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god-sent-gender-bent · 5 months ago

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I don't discuss this a lot online because of the (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ stigma, but I am a diagnosed DID system. I'm 30. I discovered my system when I was about 24/25, and have been in therapy ever since. My therapist was a WONDERFUL woman who was trauma informed, ISSTD trained, and actually did her PhD thesis on dissociative disorders. (I'm am VERY privileged to have had access through her, she worked for our community health center which is a RARE find.)

My treatment goal was not "final fusion." It was *Functional Multiplicity.* (Keeping my alters instead of forcing us to be "one person") My brain adapted to some horrific shit. That's how it's going to cope the rest of my life.

Throughout the 5+ years I've gotten to work with and know my system, I've been able to accomplish more than I had in the 10+ years of my adult life. I lived my life thinking I was broken, crazy, forgetful, messy, and unlovable. When I started accommodating my brain and how it developed to work, *I got better.* And not "better" by neurotypical standards, but better by mine.

I made it through college with my associates. And am now working on an accelerated bachelor's/master's. I have a stable relationship and housing for the first time. I'm engaged. I own my car. I have friends that love me and a well-paying job. NONE of that would have been possible if it wasn't for the accomodations I made for myself and my system.

We work together as a TEAM. And the closer we get, the less amnesia we have. I can access memories that used to be locked away. I can share information freely. We can rotate out if things are overwhelming. Our existence isn't wrong. We aren't hurting ANYONE. We're adapting. That's all this disorder is. It's adaptation.

On September 24, my dad wrecked his motorcycle and ended up in Neuro ICU. For two weeks I had to be in that room, making sure his wife was okay and being the responsible party for everything. One of my biggest traumas is watching my mom suddenly code and pass in front of me after a two week hospital stay twelve years ago. I split an alter because of that and still have flashbacks to this day from it.

This was an EXTREMELY traumatic situation that I was put into once more. But you know what? Because I worked with my system, we were able to take turns, rotating out when things got too overwhelming. Each of us would "tag in" if we got too many symptoms of an episode coming on.

Our emotional caretaker/organizer would take over when things got to be too much emotionally or we needed to organize work things online. Our protector would take over when we needed to be assertive with pushy family members. Our medical alter (from mom passing) would speak with the doctors, gaining valuable information to pass on to the family and made sure we took our meds and handled the pharmacies when we ran out. I would comfort his wife and tell her stories. Our other, home-oriented caretaker would make sure his wife and I ate food and drank water by getting meals at the hospital cafeteria.

When we made the difficult decision to remove him from life support, my system was there. We all knew and loved my dad, even if he didn't know us. We all got to say goodbye because we increased communication and worked *with* our system instead of against it. That means no one has regrets and everyone has closure. Because of my system, what could have been a huge traumatic event, causing amnesia, splits, and mayhem in my life, became a tragic event that I was able to accept and start healing from.

I found out this week that we did split off an alter. But it wasn't from the actual trauma of losing my dad. It was to help with school stress. I don't fully know her yet, but she seems like a wonderful addition to the team. And that's why I love Functional Multiplicity. If my goal was fusion, and I was "one person" again, this would have caused another split. My brain copes with trauma by splitting. If I fuse and then split, I'm back at square one. More amnesia, more fear, more problems. But if I have a system that works together, is functional, and can welcome a new part openly, why wouldn't I keep that system? I'd rather have a trained team on deck to help through anything that comes my way, ready to help a new part, than to go back to how I was before.

Don't ever let people tell you your accomodations are wrong. Don't ever let anyone tell you that how your brain adapted to trauma is wrong. That being said, if you're a system, and your goal is final fusion, that's fine. You know yourself and your system. FM is right for us. FF may be right for you. The key is learning yourself, accepting that, and figuring out what's best for YOU. I love my system. They were created to help me survive. They're tough, resilient, strong, loving, protective, and, ultimately, my family. People don't have to understand it. But I'm happy, safe, and healing for the first time in my life, and if people think that's wrong, they can fuck off.

I love seeing those posts where people are like “if you have headmates or whatever you should be on meds because that’s not okay” posts. Like neurotypicals just think that there’s some magical pill out there that will ‘cure’ anything they don’t consider ‘normal.’ Meanwhile, in the land of reality, my shrink thinks it’s pretty healthy that I’m finally getting to know my headmates, and has no intention of putting me on magic pills, because as long as I’m not hurting myself or anyone else, who cares what neurotypicals think is ‘normal?’ Actually, let’s be real: who cares what neurotypicals think at all?

#did system #DID #disability #disability advocacy #disability awareness #did awareness

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my-autistic-things · 6 years ago

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I really don't like this whole having to submit a request for accommodations thing. I have a disability. I have been approved by a doctor as well as the disability services office to have specific, reasonable, accomodations for my disability. It shouldn't up to a teacher, who doesn't even know who I am, if I should get these accomodations or not just because "that's how they run their class".

#i say disability bc it was only on record im dxed with adhd #i *just* submitted the paperwork for my autism dx #im gonna be so fucking salty this whole semester i cant use the most basic calculator just bc my teacher says no #at community college i got to have accomodations #like i go to the da services office and meet with someone #and then they approve my accomodations and just tell the teachers #thats it #theres no meeting to discuss what we hope the teachers should approve #and then i hage ti fight with the teacher if they say no #like i could get the office involved agaib but its not like they can do much/anything #professors just think they can do whatever the fucj they want with no regard to students whatsoever #its quite honestly amazing how little they give a shit about students #personal #college #actually disabled #actually autistic #actually adhd #accomodations

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stagefoureddiediaz · 3 years ago

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Costume Meta 6x01

It feels so good to be back 🎉 and Now I have a 30 picture limit I’m gonna have so much fun!!!

We’re starting with a bit of colour theory because this episode went hard with the Yellow and blue colour theory from the opening scene! I mean we should have realised the show was gonna go hard with this episode - a giant blimp (actually a zeppelin but semantics!!) kitted out in yellow and blue crash landing - subtly is not known here! you can read my yellow blue colour theory here, but in summary - there has been a bit of a trend in the last few years in television to use yellow and blue in relation to queer relationships - the colour theory was used in Heartbreaker, Our flag means death, and Stranger things - to name a few! The long and short of it is that Yellow - the colour of communication pairs up with blue - the colour of trust and loyalty…

So we started with a giant yellow and blue blimp and from there the yellow and blue was all over the place - the buddie kitchen scene, the dad in the golf course emergency, the win a car emergency (blue car and guy in yellow) etc.

Ok now I’ve got that out of the way - I’m going to stick with going through Character by Character as it makes my life bit easier - putting the rest under the cut as this got insanely long!!

Lucy Wearing a light grey marl cap sleeve tee - light grey is a neutral colour - but it also symbolises control (a reference to the fact she was going to be interim captain) and practicality - ironically its also a reliable colour! there really isn’t a lot to say about her costume, other than that it continues on the grey theme for her from season 5 (her lunch with Jonah)

May

Rainbow puff sleeved cardigan Pretty amused to see May in a rainbow cardigan when she is clearly not being all sunshine and rainbows about her upcoming college experience! the use of horizontal stripes again fits in to my stripe theory and hints at Mays impending change of direction.

Athena

Athena sticking with what she knows works for her - black and olive khaki green! In many ways this colour combination is Athena’s out of work uniform, we see her in this combination or with some white/cream or in just black so often and it makes the scenes where she’s wearing colour much more impactful - It makes us take notice of what we see going on in those scenes for her. Here we have an asymmetric black jumper, olive khaki trousers and her gorgons head necklace (the symbol of the Goddess Athena).

Then when she goes over to Hen’s we have her still in the olive khaki trousers but this time paired with a white ribbed tee and a low v neck grey cardigan with a reverse waffle knit texture. this is one of Athenas more fluffy costumes - its showing her softer side - especially when she talks about giving Bobby the freedom to be carried away with his cruise planning to help him navigate the temptation being on a cruise ship will bring. The grey is again a symbol of stability and authority as well as wisdom and maturity - something reflected in her words - her recognition and understanding of Bobbys internal struggles, but also the fact that she came to Hens house to accomodate Hens crazy schedule - and still get to spend some time with her friend - its an opportunity for Hen to offload on a few things, rather than just getting increasingly burried under her work load.

The magenta top she’s wearing as they get ready to head off on their cruise is a wonderful choice. Magenta is a colour of kindness - it uplifts and supports others - again an indication of what Athena is doing in regards to supporting Bobby and foreshadowing the fact that she’s goingto be heading to Florida to support her parents.

Bobby

Bobby - Bobby in an army green/grey tee - very similar in shade to ones we’ve seen Eddie wear (especially Eddies breakdown) is an interesting choice - especially with all the conversations about bobby being in the program and the bars on the cruise ship etc and obviously there is the scene in 5x18 of Bobby and Eddie having a conversation and then Bobby pouring a bottle of whiskey down the sink. there is very much feeling of Bobby being finely balanced at the moment - teetering on the edge of things spiralling and that it won’t take much to tip hip over that edge. the blue and coral hawaiian shirt screams very much of someone trying too hard - especially combined with his spreadsheet cruise planning.

Hen

Hen is in a hoodie with neon orange graffiti spray paint swirls on - such an interesting choice - orange is a colour of energy and mental stimulation. its also a risk taking colour. the use of graffiti, for me at least, is an interesting one - it has an air of ‘the writing on the wall’ about it - its saying to me that the medical career path isn’t going to be something Hen continues pursuing - that her heart isn’t completely in it (the heart medical book on the desk being the one furthest away from her also plays into this idea).

Chimney

I’m going to talk about Chimneys costume as a whole because if you look anthem all together you can see the gradual change - the way they become increasingly dark. we go from the blue of the first jumper through to the darkest navy button up shirt with white check at the end. so We go from a fairly bright shade of blue - the symbol of trust and loyalty and security.

then there is the teal/green when Madney are on the sofa. its a mixture of the blue meanings, but also green meanings of harmony, hope and balance and renewal. a perfect colour for this moment, but the darkness of its tone hints at the fact not everything is going be smooth sailing from here on in.

then When Chimney comes home, he’s in a navy blue jumper and tee. this is a lighter shade of navy and is pretty similar to the blue of Chimneys uniform - a connection to the conversation he had with Bobby and Eddie earlier on. Navy is a colour associated with authority and responsibility (hence its use in uniforms) but the thing with navy is that it also has connections with depression and mental health struggles and the fact that we then have Chim in an even darker navy with a white check pattern the next time we see him is indicative of not everything being as happy as it appears on the surface. We all know Madney are going to be going to couples therapy this season and this shirt is an indicator of this. (It doesn’t hurt that it also supports my check patttern theory either)

Maddie

Maddie drops of Jee with Chimney - black blazer grey zip front hoodie and tee with stars on , heart necklace - Maddie being back in blazers is a great sign from a costuming perspective - we have only seen her wearing blazers when she’s in a good place mentally - just before Doug kidnaps her and then again when Madney are in a good place. this black blazer is connecting to the times Maddie and Chim have made starts in there relationship - she was wearing a black blazer when she was getting ready for her date with chim, and then again when they went on their first proper date. So that blazers an indicator that Maddie is in a good place and ready to embrace happiness with Chim once again.

The grey hoodie is an interesting choice because we don’t see Maddie in grey very often at all (I actually can’t think of any incidents of her wearing grey - I haven’t finished my full costume plot yet so I can’t be 100% but I can’t remember any) it shows her practicality and stability, her having gained wisdom, insight and maturity - like the black blazer its a key indicator of where she’s at mentally and the combination of the two is indicative that this time she’s in the right place of it to last

Maddie in bed in a tie dye tee and we can see the pink hoodie on the chair in the corner. Im not sure if its going to turn out to be a cut scene and we only know about it because of the trailer or if it will be a scene to accompany chimney being in the car that’s going to (almost) hit Buck but the outfit is the same as the trailer scene of Maddie and Jee-Yun looking for Chimney in the living room. Im inclined to think its a separate scene and the repeat outfit is deliberate - to highlight what seems to be a developing theme of history repeating itself. The upcoming car accident has so many potential call backs for so many characters (Chim being in car (potential rebar call back) as well as being kidnapped again (which will also impact on Hen and Bobby) Buck and the ladder truck, the Shannon callback for Eddie, Hen and Evelyn, Buck and bike accidents)

The coral blazer is a really great colour on Jen, but its also a great choice from a colour theory perspective. We have Maddie in a white tee with a 60’s style bubble writing logo which says (I think) all good and a coral coloured blazer. I’ve already said blazers are good for Maddie and this one is no exception. Coral is a colour of warmth and acceptance, it has good intentions and is optimistic - it is a colour about a bigger picture rather than small details. this is important because this conversation that Madney have is about the bigger picture of their relationship - the conversation reads like Maddie making vows to Chim (foreshadowing of a wedding anyone??) but it is at its heart one that recognises they will need to continue to put in work to sort out the small stuff - its just that in that moment - the bigger picture and acknowledging that it is the thing they lost sight of while and need to not let that happen again.

I’m a little obsessed with the green jacket we see Maddie in in the last scene and I’m sad we don’t get a better look at it to be honest - because there is so much going on. Firstly the yellow tee underneath is indicative of both happiness and the fact that Maddie communicates that she’s staying to Jee. Its a significant moment for both Madney and Jee-Yun so the use of yellow was important for this scene. As for the Jacket though. We have a floral embroidered decoration on the back - a possible throwback to Madneys first meeting when Maddie is wearing a denim shirt with floral embroidery on the yoke. But the really interesting thing is the two cranes on the right shoulder.You may recall I made this post about Hen’s crane shirt in season 5. well here we have more cranes being used in connection with Chim. Cranes mate for life and are a symbol of fidelity so here we have a visual symbol to show us that Madney are in the right place now. the other thing about cranes is that they migrate over long distances - Madney have travelled both metaphorical and physical distances to get to where they are now and those cranes are a symbol of that.

Christopher Let’s start with Chris as he’s the easiest! here we see him in a raglan sleeve tee - lightish blue sleeves and a grey body with white horizontal stripes. the stripes play into my stripe theory - change is on its way for Christopher - this most likely relates to his impeding push for some freedoms from his father - wanting to become his own person etc, but its incredibly hard to look past the stripes being connected to everything that went on in that scene - suggesting that the change that is coming is more related to the changing dynamic of the Buckley-Diaz family! the grey is a marl and it references to the same things as the Lucy tee from earlier - practicality, reliability (we can all rely on Chris to have a sassy dig at either Eddie or Buck!) while the blue arms are about trust, security and loyalty. the implications being that Chris is in safe, trusting environment and the bonds between the three of them are strong.

Chris is wearing a blue t-shirt with a pair of skateboards on in parallel with each other- one red and one blue is such an interesting choice! to choose to call back to the skateboard incident from Fools (3x12) is very loud. it not only draws a contrast between Buck ad Ana, it also serves as a subtle reminder of the first time we see a Buckley-Diaz family scene after the previous kitchen scene - the first time we get to see Buck stepping into a coparent role with Eddie.

Eddie

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. I said a while back that if we ever saw Eddie wearing yellow the Buddie would go canon. And here we have Eddie in a buttery yellow button shirt. There is so much to say about this outfit. Yellow is the colour of communication, but it is also the colour of optimism and happiness and of intellect. Eddie wearing yellow for the first time in the first non his first non uniform scene in season 6 speaks volumes about where Eddie is at mentally and personally. This is especially loud after the darker tones we saw him in in season 5 and the choice of having him in two different patterns at the vow renewal really highlights how far he has come. It’s a deliberate choice to show us where Eddie is - combine that with the giant heart eyes he’s sporting whenever he looks at Buck and its clear that the last 4 months have further transformed him from where he was at at the end of season 5. The shirt is also better fitting than mot of his outfit from season 5, where we saw him in oversized and stretched out clothing - adding a physical dimension to his mental struggles.

I’ve seen a few people comparing this shirt with the one he wore for his math date with Ana, and calling it his date shirt but I don’t think its right to put those two shirt into the same category. Especially as the shirt above actually matches up with another Eddie shirt - in fact I think it is the same shirt thats just been over dyed a buttery yellow (reason I think this is that the buttons are the same colour on both shirts!) and tailored to fit Ryan better. 2x17 - In Bobbys apartment having a conversation about if Eddie is ready to be a good husband

“we already know you’re a great dad’ “I guess the question is, can I be a good husband”

All this just before Shannon asks for a divorce and then gets killed in a car accident!

To have essentially the same shirt - just in a more cheerful colour - in such a domestic scene where they’re acting like husbands suggests that Eddie wasn’t ready back in 2x17 (because it was t he wrong person) but now - he’s in a better place (hence the brighter colour) and is ready to be a good husband! All this combining with Buck in his paralleling denim shirt showing his growth and when we know Buck is about to (almost) get hit by a car! 🤯🤯🤯 Honestly - wardrobe team I bow down to you - you’ve really hit it out of the park this time!

I just wan to show you the math date shirt from 4x08 - as you can see - not the same shirt - this one is a western style shirt - pointed yoke, pointed pockets and metal buttons/ poppers!

I actually like that the math date shirt is a western style shirt - it fits in nicely with the other times we’ve seen Eddie in western style shirts - around Shannon and his family - the concept of traditional values etc in shirt form!

Eddies grey shirt at the end of the episode is very much intended to sit in parallel to the shooting and especially the will scene.

Its a darker grey marl, so not the same as a navy blue, but the neckline has a very similar cut to it and grey as a colour can mean insight, maturity and wisdom - it is also a stable colour so its a great colour to have Eddie in in this scene - especially with them connecting Buck to the diaz boys through the editing. We are seeing an Eddie who is stable and comfortable in who he is - who has spent the episode being insightful and wise - talking Buck off the ledge during his ‘tantrum’ and being the living embodiment of what therapy can do for a person! The other thing to note about that t-shirt is the connection with that space and season 5 - one of the last times we saw Eddie in the dining room - Buck was there and wearing a similar shade of grey and Eddie sat in that same chair after therapy and picked up Bucks heart!!!! The implication of this parallel is the Eddie will be there for Buck in the same way we saw Buck being there for him!

Buck I went into it in more detail in this post, so I’ll keep it brief here. Buck is wearing a white tee - and we’ve long established that Buck and white tops means trouble! in this instance the trouble is his tantrum over being passed up for interim captain and actually reflects nicely on to the turmoil his mind is currently in in relation to his personal life with all the loaded sentences about couches and and relationships. Then there is the the mid to light blue zip front denim shirt with vertical stripes - we haven’t actually seen him in a denim shirt of any description since the western style one we saw him wear for his coffee shop date with Abby at the end of 1x09. This parallel hits on a few different levels. Firstly 1x09 is the only other time that blimps are mentioned in 911!! yes indeed that coffee shop date comes after that locker room talk with bobby about blimps and stepping in. That coffee shop date is when we see Buck choosing to go all in, in his first serious relationship - seeing all the things that come with dating Abby - and choosing to embrace them (dare I say that this is the Buck 1.5 KR was speaking about in her interview which adds an additional dimension to the kitchen scene!) and stepping in - something we’ve seen him do with Eddie time and again. That date was the foundation stone for what Buck has been building with Eddie - it was a moment of growth for him and a lesson he took to heart and continues to live by to this day. That we see this in a scene so laden with metaphors in an episode with another blimp - this time an actual one rather than a mentioned one - this speaks volumes about the intent of the writers and the direction the show is going in.

Buck is also wearing a watch in this scene - something he doesn’t do outside of work that often and especially when he is around Eddie (I haven’t finished writing my full costume plot yet, but the only time he wears one around Eddie in seasons 2-3 is when he takes Eddie to collect Chris after the earthquake).

Then we have Buck alone in his loft. there are several things to walkabout in this scene and first up we have white trainer theory - one again coming in for the win. those white trainers are a representation of Bucks journey and search for love (both romantic and familial) so to see them at this moment is highlighting that Buck has made more progress on his journey.

The white shirt with stripes call back is so very loud. This shirt however has a few differences. the stripes are a combination of Bucks two previous white shirts with a twist. There is the white pinstripe shirt from the shooting - with its narrow light grey pinstripes;

And then the shirt from the Taylor moving in to the loft scene (which of course features the couch!) which is a short sleeve shirt with wider and darker grey pinstripes;

This shirt is also worn in the conversation with Maddie (where buck confesses to Maddie he kissed Lucy).

The shirt for this scene in 6x01 is a combination of the two shirts - there is both narrow and wide pinstripes and it is of a similar cut to the other loft scene, only its not a button down shirt, its a button up shirt, its also cream and the stripes are blue and they have a tiny yellow stripe next to them! Yes blue and yellow theory in action on Bucks shirt!

I have a semi developed theory about Bucks vertically striped shirts - because Buck seems to wear them at moments when he is almost ‘imprisoned’ by something mentally. The trauma Buck experiences in the shooting is its an obvious prison - especially as they haven’t yet talked about the shooting - Taylor moving in was again a prison of his own making and only helped prolong the torture of an unhappy relationship. There is also the black with white pinstripe shirts we see a couple of times - all connected to Taylor and her mental manipulations of Buck (I think i’m going to have to put together a full post on these shirts because there is too much to go into here) and this most recent pair of shirts - the blue one from earlier - where we have a Buck doing some mental self torture trying to work out why he’s been passed over for the interim Captain job and finally this new white one - Where Buck is currently in a mental prison of sorts around what he does actually want in life - this self imposed prison is such a complex one - its of course in part tied to his job and future aspirations on that front, but more importantly all of the context and subtext we got in this episode is heavily implying that we have returned to a Buck who is on some level now conscious of his feelings for Eddie. there is so much complexity here for Buck to wade through - Evan ‘the clinger’ Buckley is clearly wrestling with the idea of what if it goes wrong - what if he’s reading too much into things - he’s not yet in a place where he is prepared to risk both his friendship with Eddie, but almost more importantly his relationship with Chris - the kid he promised he’d always be around for. Buck is not yet willing or able to accept that the risk is worth the reward - that this is the forever love he’s been searching for. There is also the job to add into the equation - would they be split up at work if they begin a romantic relationship, how would it affect the dynamics- of the team, and would it have an impact on Bucks newly awakened desire to progress his career. I also thin there is something in it about accepting his queerness - not in a grappling with it kind of way - more in a deeper level understanding this aspect of himself and recognising its impact on his life. The best way I can think to try and explain what I mean is to use my own experience with gaining my ASD and ADHD diagnosis as an adult. When I got my diagnosis - suddenly all these little things that I had experienced throughout my life up to that point suddenly started to make sense - the dots began to connect and I could better understand who I was as a person (and how tings might’ve been different if I’d known earlier). its not that it changed me as a person, more that I was able to make some break throughs mentally. it feels to me at least that that is what we’re seeing Buck going through - he’s now beginning to understand himself better and its this love for Eddie that is allowing it to happen. And Buck does need to connect to parts of his younger self in order to move forward - and that includes recognising past relationship behaviours as well as other traumas (the shooting) need to be understood.

Wow I got a bit off topic there!!! all this to say that that white shirt has so so much to say about where Buck is at as a larger theme. I’m wrapping it up here - if you made it to the end I am here handing you cookies in thanks! 🍪🍪🍪

Tagging people who have asked to be tagged. If you’d like to add you name to the list - please comment on this post and if you asked to be but you name isn’t below - it won’t let me tag you for some reason 🥺🥺🥺

@mistmarauder @theladyyavilee @loveyourownsmiilee @leothil @girldadbuddie @kitkatpancakestack @bucksintheroom @lemotmo @trashendence @elishareads @clipboardsandstethoscopes @comfortbuddie @fiona-fififi @name-code-black-widow @prettyboyandthekid @callanee @calyssmarviss @alwaysme @pbandjeremiah @batgrldes @piningpettyeddie @bi-moonlight @spotsandsocks @projectabc @livingwherethesidewalkends @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @idontshitpostbuttheolympicpark @diazboysbuckley @sweettsubaki @jordxnhennessy @shortsighted-owl @sherlocking-out-loud @ekstasisandangst-main @favouritealias @hearteyesdiaz @gossamerglob @ktinastrikesback @adamrparrrish @princesschez75 @bucksbuddie @oneawkwardcookie @leatherat @moniquekatie @wanderingwomanwondering @trickster-archangel

#kym costume meta #911 costume meta #meta #6x01 costume meta #911 costumes #costume theory #Athena grant #Bobby nash #Hen wilson #Chimney Han #Maddie buckley #Christopher Diaz #evan 'buck' buckley #Eddie Diaz #Buddie #911 on fox #911onfox #911 fox

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doberbutts · 3 years ago

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Is2g no one bad faith that like me saying Deaf people can't read or write when I fucking know they can - IF they did not grow up language deprived IF they had access to formal education IF they either had accomodations or were moderately successful at bootstrapping it IF they rolled the dice and got lucky.

Dad got into college because he wrote a beautiful essay on discrimination regarding racial structures within the foster care community. His calligraphy is beautiful- I grew up walking by MLK and Malcolm X's speeches hand-transcribed with ink and parchment framed on our walls. His poetry, his academic essays, his biography, he is a master with words. Many Deaf people are.

And many Deaf people aren't, because they didn't get the good dice roll. Dad was born hearing and became Deaf as a young boy due to serious injury. He already had language acquisition. I've had several customers over the years that couldn't 'just write it' because they were not born hearing and their parents never bothered to teach them visual language (like ASL) or grant accomodations. Adult people. People older than me. Some as old as my dad.

"just write it" isn't helpful. You never know when you're going to get my Dad, or when you're going to get one of those customers of mine who had no written English skills. Captions and subtitles do not help that subset of the Deaf community. No one ever helped them learn to read in the first place.

ASL is something everyone in this country should at least have even a mild interest in learning. There really is no reason why we as a country chose to ignore an entire subset of people and let them be blocked from very large portions of society just because we don't feel like taking some extra time to teach the upcoming generations as well as ourselves how to talk to those who cannot hear us.

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morrigan-sims · 3 years ago

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Was having some Thoughts the other day about my experience on simblr and how it affected my life and wanted to write them down. Might get a little mushy/personal, so feel free to skip!

So, I joined tumblr a few years ago (around 2018?? I think?? I got TS4 for x-mas 2017, so that makes sense.) originally because I wanted to follow cc creators. After that I started following gameplay blogs, and after that I started following storytellers. The idea that people could make art, or tell stories via the sims, that was unimaginable to me. And it was so cool and inspiring. I never dreamed that I’d ever be a person with a sims story, or that simblr would be as important to me as it is. Simblr is indirectly responsible for some very big parts of my identity. How? Let me explain:

Simblr was my first major exposure to a very diverse community. Having grown up in Suburban White Town #3,895, I had basically only ever met people of a certain type. But on simblr (and tumblr in general), I got my first real exposure to different cultures, religions, and viewpoints. When I came to tumblr I was in highschool, and yet barely knew anything about the world outside my town’s little bubble. By seeing other people’s sims, I learned to be more accepting of races, body types, and most importantly the LGBT+ community.

In my conservative hometown, I didn’t know a single LGBT+ person (at least no one who was out). But seeing a ton of representation via the sims made me realize that cishet wasn’t the only option. And I started to realize that maybe the reason I had never felt the same way about “crushes” that other people had in middle school and high school wasn’t just because I was a weirdo. (I mean, I’m that too, but...) I realized that yeah, okay, men can be pretty, but so can women, and so can NB people. And not everyone feels that way. And I learned that “hey, maybe the reason you feel so confused when people talk about being attracted to someone is because you’re demi-sexual.” And that turned into, no, I’m ace and bi, which turned into I’m ace, at minimum demi-romantic, but also still bi. So, what I’m trying to say here is that simblr made me gay. (/j)

Okay, cool, so now I’m comfy with that part of my identity, and getting more and more comfy with it (even if I’m not out to many people irl), that’s great!! But then I started bumping into the neurodivergent community on simblr. I knew I had ADHD and had known for a while. So, on a whim, I joined @seaslugsims discord server for ND simmers. And I met some amazing people. That was only during 2021!! And the more I talked to those amazing people, the more I started to wonder, “hey, maybe you’re more than just ADHD, maybe you’re autistic”. And so I brought up the topic and wound up seeking an ASD diagnosis. And this month, exactly one week ago today (when I’m writing this), I got my official autism diagnosis.

So, in conclusion, because of simblr, I: A) have a much wider worldview than I would have only seeing my incredibly un-diverse town for all of highschool, B) am comfortable with my sexuality (or lackthereof) and actually know enough to find labels that feel comfy, and C) got a diagnosis that might drastically improve my life in college next year, if the disability center is accomodating. So, yeah, thank you simblr.

#personal #nonsims #morrigan.txt #was gonna wait until posting this on the anniversary of me revamping this blog but that's not til june 1st and I don't wanna wait #so here you go

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blxetsi · 4 years ago

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modern levi ackerman dating headcanons

lowercase intended !

levi ackerman x gn!reader

- firstly, lets get love language out of the way

- i think his love language would be acts of service

- so like, he'll brew your coffee for you and set out your favourite mug when he goes to the kitchen to make his tea (bc we all know he'd wake up earlier than you 🙄)

- or he'll pick up a muffin from your favourite bakery on his way home

- or if you ask him to remind you to do something later, he's immediately writing it out on a sticky note and sticking it somewhere youd notice

- he notices youre getting low on your favourite moisturizer ? or lipbalm ? he's taking a picture of the packaging and getting it the next time he drives past walmart or smth

- he just does little things that help make your day better

- now i feel like a lot of people say this already, but he is NOT very comfortable with public displays of affection

- its not that he doesnt like it when you touch him, or hold his hand, or kiss his cheek, he just gets flustered and feels like everyone is watching you two

- but one thing he does allow is looping your arms together while you walk, especially in crowded streets

- it doesnt mean he doesnt like being close with you, he just hates doing it public. when youre alone ? hes ALL OVER YOU.

- "will you play with my hair ?"

- "levi im working."

- "okay can you multitask ?" motherfucker 😐

- doesnt matter if hes the big spoon or little spoon, just being close to you is enough.

- also would try and get used to your love language

- if your love language is physical touch hes genuinely surprised by how many times you put his hands on him each day (NOT in a sexual way) like even his mother never touched him as much and he's a momma's boy 😳

- when you wake up your coming out to the kitchen to fill your coffee, but not before kissing the top of his head as you walk past

- then youre guzzling down your coffee like its water before putting it in the sink and walking back, petting his head in the process

- you'll hug him while hes cooking, or brushing his teeth. youre giving him kisses before he leaves and when he comes home, just little small acts of love, but it happens so frequently that levi cant help but notice it

- your love language is verbal affirmations ? youre getting your coffee while saying "goodmorning beautiful"

- "i love yous" are thrown at him a lot, they never fail to make him feel better

- youll compliment this man and he short circuits for a second, quickly gets used to it as time goes on

- also too i think he'd be taller in a modern au, but not very very tall like erwin, im talking 5'7" to 5'9"

- and he's fine with his height, it doesn't bother him that much, he's the average height of a man so what's the big deal ?

- also he really doesnt care about height either. youre shorter than him ? cool, that means he can bend down to give you little forehead kisses. around the same height as him ? awesome, that makes it easier for him to give you a peck on the lips. taller than him ? mf he'll climb you like a tree if he has to. really doesn't care.

- also doesn't have a preferences for body type or anything. he thinks that character is way more important than looks 100% and he'll always find different things about you beautiful. your laugh is weird ? k now he's making you two watch a john mulaney special to so youll laugh. hate your belly and wanna lose weight, he's holding you and telling you to only lose weight if you genuinely want to be "healthier" and not so you get skinny. your acne scars bother you ? he's kissing your cheeks a lot more than usual, but you can't complain. literally Loves Every Part of You

- also i think his family would absolutely ADORE YOU and his friends for that matter

- miss kuchel is pulling you into a hug the first time she sees you, and is so accomodating and sweet. shes genuinely interested in your interests and what you do for a living, and will NOT hesitate to get levi's baby pictures out if you ask.

- his uncle ? he probably wont be there for the family dinner, but then kuchel's gonna call him up like "levi's s/o ?? absolutely spectacular !!" and then hes like "huh maybe i gotta come visit to see the runt and his lover"

- also i think in a modern au, kuchel wouldve gotten really sick when levi is a boy, so kenny would have came home to take care of his sister and try and take care of levi. in the end she got better, and he went back to his own home, but now she requests that he come for at least one family holidy so they can all spend it together

- BUT back to mr. ackerman

- idk what he'd do in modern times, i used to think he'd be a good english professor for a university, but then i saw a headcanon that he'd go into law school and become a lawyer, and honestly ?? it makes sense

- after a long day at work he just wants to come home to you, he'll find you on the couch reading or doing some of your own work, so he'll just slip off his coat and blazer and undo his tie while slipping off his shoes by the door. before plopping his head in your lap and requesting you to play with his hair.

- if you don't live with him hes taking a shower and then immediately calling you asking to come over. if you can ?? great he'll be in bed waiting to be spooned. if not, thats fine, but levi would like to facetime and rant.

- also has the absolute WORST road rage

- "that little prick cut me off !"

- "levi he's taking his driver's test !"

- "so ? i hope that instructor doesn't give the idiot a pass 🙄" and then will immediately honk his horn at the poor kid.

- also wouldnt be a clean freak like in canonverse. his whole "everything has to be spotless" stuff stems from trauma, specifically being left in an apartment with his decaying mother for weeks on end, but since kuchel is alive that never happens

- were things a little hectic during the time she was sick ? sure ! but kenny always tried to tidy up a bit when he saw it was getting to levi.

- levi just likes things to be neat and tidy, he doesnt do a deep clean of his apartment every two weeks, but always makes sure to clean up his messes as soon as they happen

- also doesnt like to fight

- his mom raised him with the idea that communication is key, and always encouraged him to "explain why hes upset" so they could work together to come up with a solution

- its something hes taken with him to adulthood, and even though sometimes he sounds like hes talking to a child when hes trying to get you to "use your words" he really doesnt mean to

- if youre yelling at him he'll stand there like 😐 and wait until youre out of breath so he can say "okay lets talk about this"

- is also very handy

- have a hole in your wall ? hes coming over to fix it

- need a lightbulb changed ? hes got u dont worry

- you need to assemble a piece of furniture ? he glances at the step by step guide once before hes putting it together

- hes so great at that stuff, and you only have kenny to thank

- literally when kenny first came to stay with levi and kuchel when she was sick, the kitchen light went out and he asked levi to screw another lightbulb in, the poor kid stood there like 🤨 and when kenny said "what ? you don't know how to change a fucking lightbulb ?" levi shook his head and said "uncle kenny im seven 😐"

- kenny was APPALLED. and immediately made it his mission to make levi as handy as himself.

- also, dates with him are rlly lowkey.

- he likes being in your company, so staying home and ordering take out is AWESOME in his opinion. sometimes he'll dress up and make a fancy meal with you.

- if you like going to carnivals and stuff, he's reluctant but eventually caves. wins you a lot of the prizes.

- "fuck. this shit is rigged y/n"

- "sorry levi, lets go do something else !"

- "what ? no. give me another dollar im getting you that fucking turtle"

- hange always wants to see you. levi makes it his life mission to keep you away from them as much as possible. not because he doesnt want you to get along with his friends, just because he knows that hange will spill some embarassing secrets from his college days.

- erwin ? hes okay but hes on thin fucking ice.

- also is very gentlemanly. will not only hold the door for you but for everyone. hes waiting in line for his order and someone comes up behind him and asks him to scootch so they can get some napkins ? mf its grabbing a handful himself and handing it to the person, wishing them a nice day with a small smile. hes just like,, a genuinely good person

- his singing voice ? immaculate. will he sing for you ? no.

- he also loves playing board games with you. like chess or checkers. you love playing board games with him and his friends, specifically monopoly. hange makes moblit form an alliance with them. mike is a lone wolf, and erwin and levi are always helping each other out until erwin betrays him. lots of trust is ruined between these game nights, but you literally cant bring yourself to care because its so fun to watch it unfold

this is my first headcanon thingy !! im v excited !! hope u all enjoyed 🤩✨ should i do more headcanons like these ???

- all in all, levi is a cool guy, and a cool bf.

#attack on titan #attack on titan fanfiction #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman #attack on titan x reader #armin arlert #mikasa ackerman #eren yeager #eren jaeger

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mszegedy · 5 years ago

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30 Days of Autism Acceptance: Days 17-26

This is a list of questions by @autie-jake (full list here), where you’re supposed to answer one per day for every day of April. I keep forgetting to do these daily, so here’s all the days since my last post. My last post is here.

April 17: Have you experienced ableism before? If so, how did it feel and how did you handle it?

Yes! Actually, it made my childhood so bad that my brain decided to forget it. So, clearly nothing to write about here.

April 18: Discuss how you felt when you felt when you first learnt you were autistic vs how you feel now.

I’m not good at the whole “remembering how I feel” thing. My memories of my feelings are all semantic memory. I know as a 6th grader I thought autism was super cool and I read a whole autobiography of an autistic savant because I wanted to find out more about it (Born on a Blue Day by Daniel Tammett). After a lot of intense research, I decided that I couldn’t conclusively self-diagnose, and regretfully slinked away back into not understanding or advocating for my needs. Sometime later, an actually autistic coworker of mine looked at me for like five (5) minutes, and was like, “Hey, have you been diagnosed with autism yet?” I’ve since adopted her as my second mom, for that and other reasons. I’ve had very few moments in my life when I was sad to have an autistic trait, and I got over it fairly quickly.

April 19: Talk about scripting. Is scripting something that you normally do? What kind of situations do you have a script for? Does it help you?

People don’t like my apologies, so I have a couple apology scripts saved. Otherwise I tend to just wing it and fail spectacularly. The apology scripts tend to sound… scripted, but they’re better than just doing it myself, I think.

April 20: Discuss stimming. In what ways do you stim? What does stimming mean to you? What do individual stims that you do mean? Do you have any stim toys? What would you like people to know about stimming?

Pressure stims are the most important stims for me. I’m more likely to be squeezing a part of my body than not. If nothing else, I can cross my legs tight and squeeze them together. This doesn’t have any specific function; it’s just something I do that makes me feel better. When I’m stressed, I do it more.

I also do motion stims. Often my way of locomotion is more like dancing. This is a little strange, because I don’t otherwise dance. I always feel happy, relaxed, and in control when I do that. When I’m sad or tired, my feet are too heavy for it. I am also very animate with my hands when I talk. When I taught English in Hungary for the first time, the first question I was asked whether all Americans talk with their hands as much as I do. (I don’t think they do. I have it on good authority from at least one American I trust utterly that the way I use my hands is rather unique.)

I have two improvised stim toys for pressure stimming (a scarf for wrapping very tight around limbs, and a butterknife for applying waves of uniform pressure). I also recently found one of those head scratchy thingies, and now I use it every five minutes or so. It’s a little inconvenient with headphones on, but I’m rather creative with it, anyway. I don’t actually like light touch or tickles, but generally the head scratchy thingy can be given enough pressure to provide a substantial stimulus.

April 21: Give a shoutout to some of your favorite autism blogs/autistic bloggers

UM. HMM. Like 10-50% of the people I follow are autistic, but hell if I can remember any of their handles.

I reblog from @nonbinary-hawke and their native issues-related sideblog @finding-my-culture like multiple times a day but I’m pretty sure they kinda just tolerate me? I’m mostly cut off from the actual native community I’m supposed to be part of (the Siberian one), so I try to follow American native issues with kind of a “not my lane but I’m still sympathetic” vibe, and their blogs are most of my way of keeping in touch. But we have a lot of other random things in common too; similar age, similar neurotype, similar fandoms, etc. So I’m pretty much always gonna have a platonic tumblr crush on them, given that and how much I respect their principles.

@autisticadvocacy is ASAN’s official blog, I think, and it’s always posting useful and relevant articles.

@autisticjoy and @autismisaokay are two blogs I’ve followed for most of my time on tumblr. I get the majority of my autism-related content from them.

@autistic-noodle is the first autism-related blog I ever followed! I highly recommend her; if I haven’t unfollowed her after all this time, then that means that they’ve never reblogged anything that’s triggered me, which is pretty darn impressive.

@bogleech is my favorite webcomic artist, which is a vaunted honor coming from someone with ¾ of a special interest in webcomics. I’m not actually sure if he’s autistic, but he posts enough autism-related content to justify being on this list one way or another.

I’ve definitely learned at least one useful thing from @autisticlifehack. What was it? Who knows?

@autistic-flirting is very cute, if not very active.

Shout out to @tikibats and @dreamfriend, who I actually know IRL.

April 22: What are some social rules that do not make sense to you/that you don't understand?

I’m, uh. Actually not sure? I can usually explain stuff if I think hard enough. There’s some stuff I’ve never bothered to figure out, but none of it’s so pressing that I can actually remember it.

Oh! Actually! One night during freshman year of college, I went to the computer lab to do my homework in a not-at-all-revealing bathrobe. I’ve received several explanations on why this was wrong, but I don’t remember any of them.

April 23: Do you have any internal rules? What are they?

LOTS, wow. If I didn’t have them, I wouldn’t have any shred of consistency whatsoever. I am nothing but these rules. Some of them feel more like strong opinions that can be taken or left, like the ones pertaining to writing style, but even those I follow 99% of the time. They range from really foundational moral ones like, “Everything with a mind intrinsically deserves your friendship and understanding,” and, “Every neurotype deserves to exist,” to, “Always wrap code to 80 columns (unless it’s highly nested like Lisp, in which case consider 100 columns),” and, “When mixing fruit flavor tea, always pour the syrup before the tea.” It’s quite the hodgepodge.

April 24: Talk about community. What does the autistic community mean to you? Is it important? How does it feel?

I haven’t had much of a chance to actually participate in any autistic community yet. I don’t even really participate in the tumblr autistic community. It’s just sorta me, my second mom, and a couple random people I get to see occasionally. (Also, my dad, but we don’t talk about my dad.) Most of my friends are neurodivergent in some way, though, so I’m happy with the people I have. (Not that I don’t enjoy hanging around neurotypical people, too. But it feels good to not have to work to make yourself be understood.)

April 25: Do you know any other autistic people off the internet? Is anyone else in your family autistic or are you the only one? Do you wish you knew more?

See yesterday’s answer! I wouldn’t do this if I were doing these day by day, but I’m totally justified here, because it’s literally the previous paragraph.

April 26: In what ways can allistic people better accommodate you and other autistic people? What would you consider helpful?

It’s a broad question. My mom has been getting better at not punishing me for my autistic traits, but the other day she still antagonized me for stimming at the dinner table. (I’m 22. Nearly 23.) So it’d be great if she didn’t do things like that. Not even gonna talk about what my dad could do better. (The ways he does accomodate me seem unintentional.)

Outside of that, I appreciate it when people give me very clearly-worded instructions, broken down into small steps, with every possible detail specified. I appreciate it even more when those instructions are in written form, because I can only remember two or three of those when they’re spoken aloud.

I appreciate it when food places with complex menus have the option to just sit down with the menu, without a time limit, and make up your order. Sandwich and wrap places, like Subway, make me very uncomfortable for reason; Subway has an extremely combinatorically complex menu, and you’re expected to make up your order while they’re making the sandwich. I’d like to spend some time staring at a sheet with each sandwich ingredient listed and explained, and the ways they can be combined, first.

The current switch to online classes has been great for my ability to understand lectures, and terrible for my ability to do classwork and homework. Hearing the lecture through headphones circumvents most of my auditory processing issues, and seeing the lecture slides clearly circumvents most of my attention issues. But when it comes to doing classwork and homework, executive dysfunction rules me. I do wish my executive dysfunction were better accomodated for even in the case of normal classes (and probably careers), but it’s hard to guess what form that would take. I’ve run out of brainpower for good ideas.

For the rest of the month I will do these questions daily, one at a time. Hopefully.

#2020 #30daysofautismacceptance

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jhaymyneutron · 5 years ago

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6 years ago, I experienced my biggest failure, or what I thought to be the biggest. I failed a subject that wouldnt let me stay in the course that I was in during that time. I was so depressed that things werent going the way i wanted it to be. It wasnt how i planned it in my mind.

Failing that subject means that I will be having a hard time shifting to the course that i really wanted to be in. (i was in nursing that time, and I planned to shift to PT in the same university) No one will take a Transcript with a singko. Well, atleast that college in the university that i was in. I had zero idea on what to do with my life, I had nothing for myself. I can no longer stay in nursing because I cant proceed with the cut off system because i had 1 singko (also i really didnt want to lol) I only had 2 choices, either I shift to another course that is not PT or leave my dream university and pursue PT in a different school. I didnt like both so I didnt do anything. I was a mess.

Some would say, if you dont want to leave that university then you shouldve just shifted in another course.

My 2 cents:

Nursing wasnt my cup of tea and I failed because no matter how hard i try to study, things werent just working out for me. It isnt just for me exactly.

Therefore, if i chose to go to another one that i didnt like to be in, in the first place, then I wouldve just repeated the same story but im just in a different uniform.

and so I told my parents, I needed a break. I wanted to find myself and think about what i really want to do. I stopped attending college for a year. But i never heard anything dull from my parents. They just smiled at me and said “go ahead. Do what you need to do”

For a year, I did things for myself. Things happened. I had a roller coaster ride of unexpected scenarios, that luckily I was present and I was able to cover for it because I was on a hiatus. A lot of times i felt useless and “patapon” in that 365 days but there are days that I suddenly realize, aside from trying to find myself, I took a hiatus for some unknown reasons and it was already showing up one by one.

Failing and reflecting was new to me, I realized i felt so entitled even when i dont deserve it. Ive been living as a “what i see is what i get” and it wasnt healthy for me, not even for everyone.

The thing is, UST is my dream school and I dont want to leave UST, but also I couldnt stay. Ive been so stubborn, and it only gave me heartaches because what i want wont always work. I’ve reflected so much, and I asked myself a hundred times, will I really just let myself have this heartache, randomly cry at night and think that im not good enough? When I already have the answer in front of my face and all i have to do is explore new environment and have the courage to take it? And so i left.

I went to a school that i never saw, in a place that i was trying to avoid my whole life because it is damn far. But what kept me going? I started with a boring and uninteresting days, weeks and months in this school. But eventually, i met the most welcoming and undesrtanding people in my life. I had this genuine happiness that I wasnt able to get in my former school, in here, I felt that I belong. Professors were accomodating and remembers our name, even asks us how were doing everyday in the hallways. It was more than a community.

After 4 years, I never failed saying “buti nalang lumipat ako” “i went through all those sad times, to get this super saya experience with the realest barkada”. I met people who accepted me not because they were just simply open but because they feel the same. I even met someone who gave me so much to remember, crazy. Funny twists of fate.

Exactly a year ago. I failed a subject. For the first time in 4 years. One subject that held me in becoming an intern. One subject that separated me from my friends. I cried upon getting the results of my exams. The first time my friends saw me cry, i was bawling my eyes and pouring my heart out in the quiet halls of UG. I was crying, not because I failed, but because i cannot picture myself telling my parents that I failed one subject. I am ashamed to be giving them another burden, when im already at the age of giving them the life they deserve.

I cried and cried, until i finally gave my mom a call. I was nervous, but I had to do it.

“Hello?” My mom answered. I was crying silently and cannot utter a word. “Hello? Jhaymy?” i sniffed a of couple times and my mom figured out i wasnt okay. “Bakit ka umiiyak?” I was biting my tongue while i was sitting in the corner of an empty hallway. I couldnt talk but my mom didnt forced me, she was just at the other line listening silently while im crying. Finally, I told my mom “ma.... sorry. Bumagsak ako ng isang subject” i started letting my mom hear my cry. I kept saying sorry that i couldnt count it anymore. I heard my mom telling my dad why i was crying. My dad simply shouted for me to hear. “Okay lang yon!!!! Isa lang yon!” My mom got mad at, because i kept saying sorry “tigilan mo yang kaka sorry mo. Okay lang yon!!! Wag ka na umiyak jan. Okay lang yon, umuwi ka na wag ka na umiyak jan”, my sisters overseas called me and said “its okay, its normal” “but ate, i want to help you in providing already” “jhaymy, its okay. Kaya pa namin. Dalawa kami. Mag aral ka muna mabuti at okay lang yan. Okay lang kami”.

Months passed, i bid goodbye to my friends and sent them to internship, i felt sad but I realized I wasnt ready. I dont know anything. My supposed to be patients doesnt deserve me. I know nothing. And when I repeated another year, I understood everything. I asked myself where I was the whole time the other year. Totally absent minded.

When i went for another year, i met different people. People whom i never thought Id vibe with. My 4th year season 2, gave me so much learnings, and gave me a chance to build new friendships. This year, I met someone who gave me a different vibe. You know who you are, and if youre reading this im probably gonna be shy, but oh well im just stating facts. Never had the chance to say this to you but, thank you. You made me think that im not always the wrong one and that i was patient. Thanks for letting me have a crush on you hahahahahaha i dont know how long this will take but youre really hard to forget hahahahahahah. Bye. And so if i didnt take another year, I wouldnt have met this great person and i have never been more thankful.

My last cent, whatever happens, it happens for a reason. You may not instantly know why it had to, but one day you will be able to say why it did. And you will smile like a fool for realizing that you took a different way somewhere over the years. but finally, you came in to the perfect place.

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yeehawfolk · 6 years ago

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hi! i dont mean to restart shit but i feel like the reason neurodivergent ppl butt heads over gifted kids so much is that to kids like me who had undiagnosed adhd that had me hide my report cards and tests in elementary school, its kind of a slap in the face to hear so many people who you were compared to and put down against talk about issues that have plagued you since you were super young, but framed in a way that only they could relate to! the education system fucks over both “gifted” AND-

-kids who were barely scrapping by! it just affects us at different stages of our lives, and for different reasons. tying my intelligence to my self worth, an inability to ask for help, always feeling like im underperforming, etc, these are all things that affect me because i dont want to be the ‘dumb kid’ again. i still have to do extra work my high achieving brother doesnt because my mom doesnt trust my intelligence!! + i also think that ppl are bitter yall cld do so well during school-

- in the end, i think our experiences are more like a mirror; “ure dumb and forever will be vs if u get less than the top of the class ure a failure and ur achievements dont matter” (also, personally, even after hearing all the shit the gifted program put yall thru, id love to have been a gifted kid. id rather know i have the capacity to be smart than be the kid who regularly scores in the bottom of the class)

Listen, I am neurodivergent. That's what my entire post is about, how because I was gifted, I was seen as ""too smart to be disabled"" and given no accomodations whatsoever, even though I greatly needed them. I was autistic, but nobody in the education system even THOUGHT to look at why I suddenly started failing classes when I got into 10th grade, nobody even thought to ask me why I was having such a hard time. Because if I was ""smart"" then I should be able to do good in advanced classes. So ergo, my struggling was laziness. Except for one teacher, who when I told her, told me I needed to suck it up and get my homework done or she was going to fail me.

Like, I'm not trying to demean your experiences in the school system or say "I had it worse than you", but the entire reason I made the post in the first place was because I was absolutely fucked by the gifted label in school because I was neurodivergent. The gifted label leaves no wiggle room. You're either smart and pass your classes, or you're lazy and get shit grades, according to teachers.

I had a burn out at 15 years old. Think about that. I was 15, a time where I should be hanging out with friends and doing fun things. But instead I fell to the floor of my bedroom and cried for over an hour because I just couldn't face the fact I didn't do my homework again and my teachers were going to fail me. I was so mentally unstable because of the expectations put on me by the gifted label, I was so scared of seeing that big fat F painted across my report card, that I just broke.

On top of that, I was placed in advanced classes or classes I didn't need because I was ""smart"" and it would look better for getting a ""smart"" job. They kicked me out of the one place I felt safe in the school, Art, and replaced it with electives I didn't need or want simply because it would look good on my college applications. They replaced my Language Arts classes with a ""Gifted Class"" in Middle School and specifically because of that, I have no idea how to structure an essay more than 6 paragraphs long. Every time I asked a teacher for help, they'd tell me to stay after school (which I couldn't at the time, I didn't have a ride) and wouldn't even explain in the simplest terms what they wanted because "You're smart [gifted] you should already know this."

You do NOT want to be a gifted kid. Trust me. Especially if you're neurodivergent, because gifted kids are basically pressured to be mini-adults as kids and when they don't respond as being a perfect pinnacle of maturity or smart-ness, they're said to have problems with laziness. Or ""behavioral issues"". I needed SO much in school, but because I was labelled as gifted, I never got any of it. If we need help with anything we're ""supposed"" to know, you're shit out of luck, because nobody will give it to you. "You're smart, you're supposed to know this!" Is our mantra, and eventually, we stop asking.

The reason I made the original post is because the ""gifted"" label is thrown at anyone who has even a moderate IQ score who ""think differently"" than others. See how that ties heavily into the neurodivergent community? Some people with the gifted label might be neurotypical, but a lot of them end up being neurodivergent later in life for the sole fact "they were too smart to be disabled" and nobody ever said "Hey, you Might be neurodivergent" because they were seen as smart.

Gifted kids don't have it easier. Our praise from adults is always tainted by "You could do better". We don't get accommodations we need. Our education is lax because we're already supposed to know it, despite never being taught whatever it is they expect us to know. Adults want to make all of our academic decisions on how smart they think we are. We're given double the work because "we can handle it". And worst of all, we're constantly beaten down with "You're so smart! Why aren't you understanding this?" As if not understanding something is somehow our fault.

The post wasn't being like "GOD GIFTED KIDS HAVE IT THE HARDEST IN SCHOOL BECAUSE OF X". It was "The neurodivergent community greatly intersects with the gifted community and their struggles in the school system need to be acknowledged and not talked over because of the notion 'gifted kids have it easier because they're smart'."

I'm not going to lie, most of the reason why I dropped out from 10th grade was because I just couldn't handle the expectations from my teachers to be the perfect student and hand in perfect papers. They beat down that 15 year old teenager who liked anime and Sonic and reading to the point where I had a complete mental breakdown and I begged my mom to let me quit. Begged her, on the floor, sobbing. I burnt out so bad I couldn't read a book for over 4 years. I'm just now starting to read again.

School is fucked. But the Gifted label adds another layer of Hell to it that neurodivergent kids just aren't equipped to handle, and I feel very strongly about letting these kids talk about what they went through, bitter people or not.

#cas talks #listen i understand that school is fucked in general #but the gifted experience is a special kind of hell especially for neurodivergent kids #also this isnt meant to be mean or in your face i hope it doesnt come off that way #education #k 12 education #education system #gifted #gifted kid

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kyleayessanerona · 5 years ago

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My Barangay Disaster Risk Reduction Management Kwentuhan

Hi. I am Kyle, and I am a first year Food Technology student in the College of Education Department of the University of Santo Tomas. As college students, we are required to take up NSTP as a school requirement. For our fourth module, we were tasked to individually conduct an interview with a barangay official. The topics were about the Hazard Identification, Vulnerability, Elements, and People Risk Assessment in our barangay. My barangay is Brgy. Sangandaan of Project 8, located at Quezon City Philippines.

Last December 4, I got to interview Executive Officer Ulysess Gil Peña.

He was so kind and accomodating in letting me conduct the interview on such short notice, due to the fact that I have 7am to 5pm classes almost everyday, making it hard for me to do the interview when the barangay closes at 5pm.

For the first part of the interview, I asked about the hazards we have in the Barangay. He told me that the most hazard we have in our barangay are the creeks, because during hard and continuous rain fall they have the tendency to rise in water level and flood depressed areas.

We also talked about other possible dangers that could greatly affect our barangay. Carelessness and forsaking safety measures are what cause these hazards, he said. One example of this are fires. Inadequacy of fire hydrants, that could go deep into squatter's areas are also a problem. But then he reassured me that the BFP is conducted every 3 months of each quarter yearly. Seminars and trainings are being done to raise awareness and instill further knowledge to officers and officials in preparation for actual disaster. Weather updates are very crucial, as they rely on them in knowing possible natural hazards ahead. Utilizing technology by using the apps such as I AM READY can be downloaded in our gadgets.

According to Sir Peña, typhoons are mostly the main contributors to a possible calamity in our barangay. This is because the people who live right beside the creeks and the villages surrounding it are the most vulnerable and at risk. The reason behind this is because the creeks have the tendency to rise in water level and overflow, flooding the closest and nearby areas aforementioned. The creeks mentioned are boundaries among other barangays. What adds to the risks the barangay deals with is that the people residing in the said depressed areas don't want to evacuate not until situations reach the critical level.

We also conducted the so called "Community Walk", wherein I get to visit the hazardous and safest places in our barangay. Officer Peña and I rode the barangay motorbike. The creeks are located in Engineering St., Insurance St., and the log's area. This is where the waterways travel down the line. When we reached Engineering St., they have headquarters there for the fire truck and ambulance. In the GIF below, water mark stains from the previous floods can still be seen. The water would reach people's trunks. On the other hand, the safest place in our barangay is the Mendoza Covered Court. It is quite near Ismael Mathay Sr. High School. Sir Peña mentioned that this was already proven during the Typhoon Ondoy. Floodwater didn't reach the court, with it being in high ground. This is where they made it into a makeshift evacuation site. They also put up tents when needed. The court is where they also conduct seminars and trainings regarding Disaster Risk Reduction Management and First- Aid. This is one of the best practices in our barangay. They are active and hands-on with both private and public schools in our barangay in yearly drills like Earthquake and Fire Drills. Sir Peña generously shared with me some photos he took then.

Documentation of our interview and a picture we took together can be seen here as well.

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yxcnghq-blog · 6 years ago

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good fuckin yard my guys gals and non binary pals !! i’m admin c and this is my messy disaster gay problem child jooseok. below the cut you’re gonna find out a loT about his tragic ass and if you hit the like button if i haven’t already, i’ll hit you up for plotting !! i’ll give a few ideas of connections on the end of this too since i’m gonna update and redo his plot page sfngn bUT let it be known i also mun aurora, euchan and emrys so i may have also messaged you for plotting on one of those acc’s, if so don’t worry i will ensure to give you the chance to plot with all my babies !! without further ado:

jooseok is the son of a mob family, they’re very well established in the criminal world. his parents are yeong dami and yeong joohyuk. however it is dami who actually runs the game and is the head bitch in charge shall we say, not to bring feminist agenda joo to life but as u can imagine due to this he has hella respect for women esp his mother bc of the strength he observed in her growing up. he thinks women are stronger and better at survival bc of learning through his ma and being trained by her.

so he was raised of course in the family gang, raised in crime and never really knew any other way to live. when he reached seventeen he was initiated officially into the gang meaning his role became more full time and his responsibility became larger. he dropped out of college after his first two years there to accomodate for this and so his education wasn’t the finest but he was homeschooled for a long time before he got too old as the gang considered it and he no longer had time for it. plus he was of the belief he knew enough about how the world worked through the observation of the good and ugly alone.

he does have a younger sister who he considers his entire world and he also has a brother of around the same age as him. the family dynamic is a little complex, he’d kill without hesitation for both his siblings despite the fact that his brother and himself often don’t agree or see eye to eye on anything, they bicker and give each other shit but they’d never turn their backs on each other. these are wanted connections i will eventually put on the list so they can be filled out also.

he’s considered an infiltrator and a double agent as his main job titles for the gang so right now he works undercover in the police force helping the wrongly accused escape a life of jail time and prove their innocence when the justice system fails them. occasionally he’s put in charge of strategy too and he is very very respected within the gang for being the youngest and yet the most skilled who rose to his tasks very quickly for his age and became the best at what he does at an alarmingly quick rate, he’s actually pretty well known for having the reputation of being the youngest to climb the ranks and gain status like this.

he could actually have been the boss of the gang with the amount of tasks and dirty work he takes on

HOWEVER...

jooseok has a huge secret and this is that recently he’s started attending college again and taken on night classes to study law and learn more about the police force so he can become a genuine crime detective. he is also undertaking training for the police force.

the lifestyle and career of the police force has always been his dream and his goal but with his limited education it was never something he could achieve alongside his gang life. this is why he jumped at the chance to at least do something undercover with the police and despite playing dirty cop, use it to do something good, vigilante like if you will.

joo can’t keep his secret forever though, his gang are getting wind of what’s going on and soon he’s going to have to go into hiding. despite the gang being his family, hits will be issued on him until he is eliminated and killed. simply put he is considered a traitor the minute he gives up gang life, and he knows far too much to simply be allowed to walk free possibly giving away all their secrets and intel. because it is a family business there are severe consequences for him turning away from what is considered his duty and responsibility.

joo = big be gay, do crime type energy. he’s abrasive and amoral but he’s also nurturing and naturally smart and talented at everything he puts his passion into. he’s resourceful and crazy adaptable and he’s equal parts a protector as much as he is a fighter. he can be broody and blunt but he can also be witty and hilarious with his dark sense of humor and somewhat messed up mind and moral code. if you’re considered close to jooseok then he’ll kill half the population of daegu easy with his own hands with no worries so long as you’re safe.

he worked undercover in america for a year so he can speak english and went by the shortened name of jo over there but most people call him seok or ong in korea to shorten his name to a nickname. he’s fluent in his english, jooseok is well known for being a quick learner in every area if u know what i mean *side eyes*

can be a bit of a fuckboy but has a big heart deep down despite it all, just keeps it concealed because of past toxic relationships and the belief taught into him from early on that any attachment to anything you don’t owe it to, would only result in weakness and vulnerability. and you don’t want people to know you have weaknesses when you do what jooseok does. *coughs* for this reason he has had a lot of pining and unrequited love situations *coughs*

he’s not that close with his parents, he keeps a strictly professional relationship with them mostly but his mum is his idol for her mentality and attitude to life. though he wishes he could achieve more than what she allowed for him to be a part of. wishes he could be normal.

OTHER LIL HEADCANONS:

joo joined the gang officially at seventeen when the initiation process took place and this was the time he met hyunjin ( @phyunjinn ) also known as his best friend and right hand man. they quickly became partners in the gang for everything, if joo had business to deal with especially the dangerous kind then nate would be by his side, acting as his protection for anyone who dared cross him and likewise he would give the same back. think kinda like alec and jace i guess as a good example with the whole parabatai bond aspect. they fight the best when they’re fighting together, and if one of them died, a huge piece of the other would die with them.

at first joo actually refused to talk to nate cause he’s a lil shit and he didn’t get why it should be important but dami urged her son, pointing out they were of similar ages and being initiated at the same time and it was important to have someone he could talk to and rely on like that. so he sidled his way over eventually and pretty easily and nonplussed like made a best friend out of the other male. they grew to have a secret code of trust between them, joo learning sign language for the male to put him at ease and also ordering the rest of the gang did the same despite complaints he quickly shut that shit down arguing they needed to be able to communicate with nate in his way to ensure his safety faster if need ever be. ( but for him personally, he learnt because he wanted to be able to talk to nate in the way that comes most naturally to the male )

in college he’s considered a soft jock type, heart of gold but he’s very physically attractive and a bit of a heart throb and definitely considered sporty despite also being very musically driven.

PLOT IDEAS:

joo needs some college friends, musically talented people he can consider study buddies, he was actually almost an idol once when he nearly signed on with a company because of how musically talented he is as a producer and songwriter - typically he only writes for close friends and always ensures the lyrics feel truthful and genuine to his friend’s stories but yeah give me people he is encouraged by with that and just able to be himself with.

friends from america potentially as well

other criminal underground kinda connections bc u know keeps business thriving to link up with other famously dangerous people and work together.

i would so love a good cop,bad cop type thing where someone who he’s on the police force with or is also training to be in the police force with him is genuine and legit and knows he isn’t and is kinda like shunning tf outta him for it but also trying to teach him how to be better without even realizing it and sort of having their mind changed on how simple good and bad is bc actually there is kind of a grey area which joo belonged to.

ex’s of course

as much as i love friends who don’t know about joo’s other life, i’d also love some friends who did and were hella concerned bc like siren noises what is this boi doing he’s gonna get himself killed and does he even cAre bc he fuckin should

roomies plssss

enemies and rivals are always welcome too maybe ppl who dislike him for turning away from the crime life and going straight or whatever rlly i also rlly like the idea of someone who sort of admired him and has a personal grudge bc he was so good at being a criminal and he made such a legacy and then he just abandoned it and they feel he wasted it or something

#daegu:intro #daeguintro

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maggotmouth · 6 years ago

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hi i’m nora ( 23. gmt. she/her ) and it turns out i really miss playing bridget ! i wasn’t feeling frida bt i wanted to explore som of her backstory more so ive kind of fused bits of her into bridget..... sue me.... for those of u who didn’t know her before i dropped her, bridget grew up in a trailer park in texas, she’s an angsty socialist leftie who gets fucked at the pub and goes off on one about capitalism. film nerd. got in on a partially subsidised scholarship and works in a bar and a fast food place to pay for her accomodation. here’s a pinboard !! everythin else is below this cut, like this post n i’ll (probably forget to) smash that im button for plots x

application template.

( cis-female ) haven’t seen BRIDGET MATUSIAK around in a while. the MARGARET QUALLEY lookalike has been known to be GARRULOUS & CANDID, but SHE can also be FICKLE & ERRATIC. The 21 year old is a JUNIOR majoring in FILM. I believe they’re living in AUDAX but I popped by earlier and no one answered the door.

aesthetics.

thumb holes poked through the cuffs of your sleeves, roller blades, grazed knees, not eating your greens, smiling with a mouthful of blood, sleeping in a cherry lip balm and scrunchies to keep the wild locks from your eyes. piercing your own ears with a safety pin when your dad wouldn’t take you.

connection to tatiana & did they choose her name during the watershed?

knew each other from the cheer team in bridgets freshman year and tatiana’s sophomore year. had a competitive friendship to start with but then they got into a discussion about politics at a party one night, and maybe hooked up a few times after tatiana had jst broken up w someone. they were sort of seeing each other very casually for a bit, but…. they came from vastly different circles n it didn’t really work. they were in a bad partch at the time of the reaping so to speak, and bridget picked her name For A Giggle but now regrets it big time obviously

tw drugs, teen pregnancy

BACKSTORY TIME.. her mother was from the wrong side of the tracks, was chucked out of home pretty young after a teenage pregnancy, wanted 2 go to art school and started working as an erotic dancer to pay for college but then jst…. ended up staying there. one of those girls u see in the documentaries who had Big Plans but ultimately never got to pursue them n jst got…. sucked in by the money

her mom n dad met in high school at a parents evening. alice was fourteen, toby was thirty-one. bridget’s mom alice was a roman catholic – uneducated in matters of safe sex, mother mary around her neck, bras hanging over wooden crucifixes – and willing to give it to the first boy who seemed interested enough, gift-wrapped or not. toby was the father to a girl down the road who alice knew nothing of besides her name and the few encounters in the corridors facing a stoney stare that screamed homewrecker. it only happened once, but once was enough. alice was out of the house as soon as her parents knew a child was growing in her womb.

bridget n her mum alice were more like sisters growing up, probably because of the closeness in age. alice should’ve known that you couldn’t have a thirteen-year-old-daughter at 27 without everyone knowing you’d been one of those girls who gave it away fast as a hot potato, and maybe bridget should have known that she’d inherit more than her mother’s wide eyes, that things have a way of circling back to us --- that at fourteen she too would lose it on the floor of a swimming pool changing room, soggy back, polka-dot nylon of a swimsuit pulled down to her ankles.

she grew up in a trailer park just outside of orlando resort, but she was raised in dressing rooms surrounded by sparkly costumes and nipple pasties and leotards and the like. as a kid she’d try to trot about in her moms heels n yearned for the day she’d be able to be on stage.

if you’ve seen the florida project its a bit like tht.... just kids left to do their own shit.... mother’s a bit all over the place... made money by stealing wristbands off orlando theme park visitors, and bridget was p much raised by the community, to be honest. most of her youth was spent scurrying about half naked in cowboy boots and glasses too big for her face. a smol feral child

gilly (referred to as junior) was born four years after bridget, the son of a carpenter and sculpture artist named gilbert “gilly” senior, her moms latest squeeze. whenever she wasn’t at school bridget would be in gilly’s workshop doin her homework surrounded by parts of furniture or hanging out with the kids who were visiting disneyland but couldn’t afford the hotels on the resort

like her mother, bridget fell pregnant barely out of her gingham print dresses, hair in two plaits down her back, teddies still lining her bed. unlike her mum, she was not box-shipped out to a home for fallen women but rather booked into a clinic, given a pill, just like taking your vitamins.

her mother flaked out when bridget was around fifteen and junior was eleven. they were in the system for a while, before gilly was finally granted custody as legal guardian. the three of them moved to marfa, texas so that gilly could run classes in sculpture and woodworking at the art institute. they’re not sure where their mother went. some say she rededicated herself as a virgin and joined the convent in penance for her sins. some say she works in a las vegas strip club and sells pills to minors. bridget likes to believe that she’s an actress, her name in newspapers and her face in a star-spangled dressing mirror.

bridget used to do sponsored silences and hunger strikes for kids in developing countries. was that kid in school who was always raising money something. i mean its kinda cute but also she just wanted the acclaim and attention so…. and most of the time it didn’t even make it to the disadvantaged kids she was raising it for cos her mom needed rent money or to buy the kids new shoes n they could barely afford much themselves

she’s a strident feminist, an activist for human rights and animal rights, a vocal vegetarian and an all-round soapbox sadie. catch her in the quad shouting about human rights through a megaphone. will most definitely have quizzed your character on institutionalised racism whilst inhaling nos at a party and snacking on a big bowl of cheesy wotsits

aesthetic: big military or leather jackets over tiny little sundresses. always in docs or creepers and a beret with an anarchist symbol painted on it. wears a long green trench coat covered in badges for alt punk rock bands or a red denim jacket that she hacked into a crop jacket with a pair of kitchen scissors. cuffed jeans, thrifted or stolen. white converse, more grey tbh through years of wear. crop tops and plaid shirts tied round her waist. smudged mascara. glitter smeared over cheekbones from the previous night. cigarette smoke shrouding you like a veil, the red string of a thong peaking out purposely from jeans, piercing your own ears with a safety pin when your dad wouldn’t take you, kate moss posters lining the walls of a teenage bedroom, thumb holes poked through the cuffs of your sleeves, feet pounding the earth until your soles bleed crimson.

an aspiring screenwriter. she has a very image-based view of memory and experience. always doing a screenplay or shooting film. her style has a lot of catholic iconography (think virgin suicides style or baz luhrmann’s romeo + juliet if it was done on a super 8 camera) bcos catholicism is one of the few things she remembers about her mother. she’s never actually tried to find her mum / find out about her, jst…. occasionally channels that energy into her work.

struggles with self-image and the need to be Loved By All a lot. uses sex as an affirmation of her worth and also kinda manic-depressive (though not officially diagnosed) bcos her upbringing was a bit unstable, she was a looked after child for a while when the adoption papers were still going through… struggles a lot with feeling unwanted, especially since her grandparents refuse to acknowledge her existence cos she was born outside of marriage….. so she craves feeling wanted,, like despite being a real women’s rights activist and hating objectification, at the same time to bridge there’s nothing better than someone sizing you up with hunger in their eyes

she’s queer, but i guess she favours women, and is incredibly vocal in her support of the lgbt+ movement. often at rallies. has done a face-sitting protest. really is that bitch

there’s a degree of anger for anger’s sake in bridget. she likes passionate, angry music – particularly garage rock, punk and riot grrrl. she loves the slits and skinny girl diet. viv albertine inspired her to take up bass guitar.

back at lockwood she was working two jobs to pay for uni !! at the bowling alley polishing the shoes and fixing the bowling lanes, and also as a burger flipper at mcdonalds. in amsterdam she’s managed to secure a part-time bar job at one of the hendrix university bars

massive film buff. is majoring in film at uni also spends a lot of time at the movie theatre n probably has like a season ticket. is one of those pretentious film nerds who’re like “what do u think of goddard’s work?” but also just really into shitty horror movies

she spends her evenings in downtown bars willing away her boredom, trying to find something that’ll jerk her out of apathetic lethargy. she toys with the idea of becoming a stripper — it certainly pays better than flipping burgers — but she lacks the energy to dance for several hours a night.

she loves b movies and slasher flicks. at parties, she’ll occasionally try to make a horror of her own, on a super 8 camera in someone’s basement, very paranormal activity, but she’ll inevitably get bored, or too drunk and give up, like she does with most things in her life. she lacks drive and motivation. she’s bright but there’s no hunger in her.

she’s fickle and enigmatic. one moment she could be your best friend, the next, she’ll behave like a total stranger. bridget’s unpredictable because she’s still unsure of her own identity, frequently flitting between different characters, like snake skins, before she grows bored of being bubbly and eager and becomes spiteful again. her core personality traits are probably forthright, impulsive, restless, thrill-seeking, selfish, gregarious, easily bored, childish.

SOME ?MILDLY AMUSING? FACTS

writes shitty poems on the back of napkins and quotes dead philosophers she’s never read. romanticises herself a lot. like will be standing there in a ripped t-shirt and her undies smoking a cig like “hmmm… i bet someone is falling in love with me right now”

is vegetarian for environmental reasons but snorts coke at parties like that isn’t shit for the environment ?? sis, it don’t add up

loves dirt. ate a worm once because someone dared her too. shamelessly disgusting.

she’s slightly obsessed with true crime, up late watching documentaries on the manson family murders.

favourite drink is cherry coke

a lot of her time is spent in the record store, plugged into a set of headphones, head-banging in the corner to a scratched record. music, for birdie, is a form of escapism. that and dropping acid in parking lots lmao.

sells nudes on twitter. whenever she gets low on cash she contacts one of the seedy old men who used to visit her mom’s club to venmo her $500 in return for pictures

that girl who’s always harping on about body positivity on instagram while wearing cute underwear and looking absolutely bomb

really good at rodeo bull riding. the club in marfa had one so as a youth she got really good at it bcos she was constantly tryin to outdo her friends on who could stay on for the longest. a video of her staying on one for like 4 minutes after downing several jager bombs went viral once.

micro-doses acid for mild depression bcos she didn’t believe in “that CBT bullshit”, thought that therapists, like her, were jst con artists so always a bit spaced out

volunteers at one of the local galleries but mostly just rants to old white dutch men about how cis white men have dominated art for years :/ is one of those SJW-types , like.... have a day off, jameela jamil......

has a pet rat called popeye

takes photographs of dead animals to use in her art and often posts them side-by-side with stills of women in porn to show the shelf-life of female sex workers in a patriarchal-dominated industry or some bullshit idk

big into spoken word poetry, even if its shit. likes savage depictions of femininity

wrote a thesis on art as an act of masturbation that got published

this bitch HATES capitalism and LOVES karl marx

time isn’t real. nothing exists. the self is a social construct. finger guns.

an awful person, really

plots i want that i mostly stole from the tags

muse a tries to stand up for muse b in a bar but unfortunately cannot fight for shit.

muse a (prob bridget cos works in a bar) works somewhere that’s open late and muse b comes in to take shelter from the storm.

‘I got in my car and you were sleeping in the backseat who the hell are you and how did you get into my car’

umm a wlw plot isnpired by san junipero ! esp this post. could have been a former fling that ended sourly !! cos i dont like ship forcing but still?? give me wlw stuff

“i just decked you in the face because i’m drunk and you were pissing me off but ow my hand really fucking hurts i think i might have broke it and oh look your nose is bleeding and now we’re both sitting awkwardly in the hospital while i glare at you from across the room. but wait are you giving me sex eyes?? stop that i’m supposed to mad at you??”

“platonically sharing a bed until i wake up and you’re curled round me and my nose is buried in your hair so i’ll pretend to stay asleep to keep this for a little while longer” plots

“highkey want a ‘someone wrote your phone number on the wall of a bathroom in my dorm with ‘call for a good time’ and i just texted you to let you know that i scribbled it out and oh wait you’re actually funny and easy to talk to and now we’re talking every day and i might have a tiny little crush on you even tho i don’t even know your name’ plot”

goddamn its another shippy wlw plot apparently that’s all my tag is but this post

“known for being rebels without cause, MUSE A and MUSE B are synonymous to their fast cars, nights out beneath the stars, empty bottles of alcohol, and loud music. they meet by chance one night and immediately click, and embark on a careless adventure after it despite not knowing each other. it’s them against the world: after all, what could go wrong ?”

any of these sad sour unrequited love plots

‘we take the same elevator every day and due to a misunderstanding I assumed you didn’t speak english and I’ve been talking to my friend about how hot you are for three weeks and apparently my friend has known from the start but you agreed not to tell me bc you both think its hilarious what the fuck’ au

‘I accidentally dropped you while you were crowd surfing and you broke your ankle and now I feel responsible so I’m carrying you out of the moshpit’ au

walked in on my roommate and you screwing except i know you from class and i freaked out a little

i was hustling you in pool for money but you were hustling me for free drinks so who’s the real winner here?

bridgot goes to strip clubs n peep shows like every day, cos she’s writing about the history of pornographic film n its basically research for her, so if ur characters would be into strip clubs they might see her there

i feel like she’d be on student council if they had one of those. shes that kind of bitch, turning up like elle woods with a big feather pen or a light-up heart marker, slamming down some truths before upping and leaving to go for her 11am chai latte break

som1 who attended the art institute in marfa for a summer n maybe knew her when she was a bit younger ??? idk

drama. angst. horror. also nice bike rides in amsterdam please

feel free to im me if u wanna plot, or, like this post and i’ll hit u with a message!

#i have literally just slapped bridget n frida in a blender.#sorry if u had plots with frida. pls feel free 2 discuss w me n we could just do them w one of my other characters instead if it fits.#xxxx plot with me my goblin children xxx #water:intro

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