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[haircarecetres-blog]

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Types of Hair Loss Affecting Women

ANDROGENETIC ALOPECIA

If you have heard of female pattern baldness, it is nothing but Androgenetic Alopecia. It is a type of hair loss problem suffered by women due to certain traits passed on in their genetics. This is called so because hair loss happens in a pattern. And that pattern is the same among all people suffering from Androgenetic Alopecia. Hair fall in Androgenetic Alopecia starts from the temples and spreads all over the scalp. Girls and women of the age group between 12 years to 40 years have more chances of suffering from Androgenetic Alopecia

TELOGEN EFFLUVIUM

Telogen effluvium is a temporary hair loss problem. In this hair growth is again possible. Telogen effluvium is caused due to excessive stress taken or exerted upon an individual. As soon as the individual completes his stress period and leads a normal life. Lack of zinc, iron, and vitamins is a common cause of Telogen effluvium. Since hair loss in the Telogen effluvium is temporary, hair restoration procedures are not that advisable. Because removal of hair restoration destroys the new hair grown on the scalp

ANAGEN EFFLUVIUM

Anagen refers to the stage in the hair cycle where the hairs are still growing. In Anagen effluvium, hairs in the Anagen stage start shedding. This means new hair growth is there but those hairs that are newly growing too are shedding. Boils and fungal infections on the scalp cause Anagen effluvium. Hormonal imbalance and stress can also cause this condition.

ALOPECIA AREATA

Alopecia Areata is a kind of hair fall problem in which hair fall happens in a start — stop — restart pattern. Hair fall problems in general if started once in a lifetime will persist for a long time resulting in complete or partial baldness. In the case of alopecia Areata, it is different. It means, doesn’t happen continuously. Instead, the hair fall problem starts and then stops after some time. Then again starts after some days, months, or years and then again stops after some time, and again the same repeats. Another important thing you should know about alopecia Areata is that hair fall, in this case, is not because of a problem with the hair. It is caused because of an acquired skin infection that affects skin areas, causing hair fall.

TRACTION ALOPECIA

If you look great with dreadlocks, then be ready to get hair fall soon. And that hair fall problem is traction alopecia. If your hair styling involves pulling hair for a long time, then you should fear traction alopecia. Traction alopecia is a hair fall problem caused when hairs are tightly pulled for long periods. Traction alopecia stands at a different position among all other hair fall problems. Because it is not caused by any medical condition but is caused due to human effort to pull hair to make themselves look great.

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[teal-fiend]

The New Hire

An assistant for a wealthy business owner is given the task of hiring a pred to perform at their party

Content: fatal vore, digestion, observer pov

—

The assistant had a party to plan. It was part of their job as a personal assistant to one of the most terrifying people in the world. Although their employer never did anything terribly illegal, the assistant had the feeling that there were dark things happening that even they didn’t know about. 

There were dark things that they did know about too. For example, their bosses' borderline obsession with predators.

Their boss had a kind of motif for the unconventional and disturbing. Their company crest was a serpent, which is already a devious animal. Instead of collecting valuable art, like a normal rich person, they purposefully bought forgeries that had been in museums and books for years before they were discovered. They bought houses where tragedies had taken place. And they loved finding old jewellery with no one left willing to inherit it. 

Despite, or maybe because they weren’t a predator, the boss effused about preds whenever the opportunity arose. Telling the assistant about famous people who were preds, or business associates who were. However, this was an avenue of themselves that had yet to be truly indulged. In fact, the boss had never hired one before, the assistant suspected they went out of their way to avoid it. Until today.

One of the things the assistant had to organise, was finding a predator to be at the party. This is how the boss phrased it: “I want you to find one who can keep down their prey, who can keep still for several hours. Maybe one who has experience as a figure painting model - I don’t know - I don’t really care, I know this was kind of last minute.”

It was last minute, it was the day-of.

“-But, just as long as you can find a predator who doesn’t have ‘stage fright’ or ‘performance anxiety’, someone moderately professional - that’s really all I need. You will pay them whatever they ask, of course. I know it’s a strange request, but it would really bring something to this party; there’s a few people I want to scare the shit out of, and this'll do it.”

The boss hired them for a reason: the assistant could get anyone, at any time, exactly where the boss wanted them. They had many, many feelers. And it didn’t take them long to get a bite. 

One of their scouts had found someone who was free that night, a pred, a masters student, broke and willing to take a sketchy job. But their LinkedIn looked reliable, and they worked at a local theatre. They played the donkey in a modern rendition of MidSummer Nights Dream... A perfect hire, really. They could probably handle some weird shit. 

The new hire was picked up and delivered to the event’s location on time (one of the bosses’ cursed apartments, a place where they specifically hosted parties). The assistant took the opportunity to formally debrief them.

“You will be dressed and prepared by our costume designers, and the hair and makeup team; we have a few other performers that you need to match - you’ll meet them soon. Your job after that is to consume the prey provided for you, you only have to eat one, and then you must begin digesting and continue until you are dismissed. The choreographer will guide you on how to compose yourself before you begin the performance. 

If you need a break, there’s a discreet button you can press, you will be able to go backstage for a short time, and someone will get you what you need.”

The pred looked overwhelmed, but eager to impress them. They nodded and said something, but the assistant was already busy with someone else. 

—

An enclosure was set up for the pred and a couple other performers to be contained in. The rest of them would be serving drinks, or performing other acts in separate areas across the venue. 

The enclosure was visible from most angles, almost in the centre of the room, although there was a backdoor that the performers could exit from. Inside was like a small, midas forest, with faberge-like flowers and funguses. It matched the decorations of the rest of the venue, except it was more dense and atmospheric. 

The enclosure was inaccessible to the audience, although there was no actual barrier, more of a circumference of props that would be impossible to navigate. The assistant had requested this, so that the view of the performance would not be obstructed.

Soon, the predator emerged, glittering under the moody, dappled lights. They had in contacts that made their eyes a solid, iridescent gold. On their back was a thin cape that looked like butterfly wings. On their head were some kind of horn or antler piece, decorated with primrose blooms. On their arms and legs were a metal lace, with a flowing transparent garment over top. 

The curves of their body, especially their now plump abdomen, was lined with the finest paint brush, of intricate, organic patterns. They looked like a bounty, the cornucopia, or a paegan god. Their prey visibly wriggled under their skin, trying in a futile attempt to escape the stomach acids that were just beginning to release. The movements of the meal made a strange optical illusion under the temporary tattoos, it glittered as it shifted in the dim lights. 

This was not the same person who came in two hours ago. Frazzled, mousy-haired, rectangle glasses, exceedingly average appearance. The person who the assistant was looking at really wasn’t a person at all. It moved, but it wasn’t a person. 

The assistant was impressed, to say the least. They’d have to give credit to the makeup department. Maybe even give them a raise. Maybe. 

They’d have to hear what their boss thought about this whole thing. Was it too much? Where was their boss anyway? 

The assistant suddenly got a sinking feeling. Had the predator they hired somehow eaten their boss? But no, just then, they appeared behind a crowd of people. Although it was early, it would only get more crowded later on. 

The assistant watched their reaction closely. Laughing at some joke, their boss turned to look at the stage. Their eyes went wide, but only for a second before they regained composure and guided their group forward to get a better look at the performance. 

---

The assistant stayed close to the predator for most of the night, this was not a time for them to network. And they also made sure two security guards stayed nearby, just in case any guests got carried away and tried to get in the enclosure. 

The other reason they stayed by, though, is to gauge reactions of the guests. Their boss couldn’t pay close attention to these things, but if the assistant gathered data, they would be able to tell how successful the idea was. 

There were mixed reactions. Some guests gawked like the pred was a zoo animal, trying to get a reaction from them, which thankfully was unsuccessful. The most the pred would do is stare at a party-goer, unspeaking, with their emotionless, ethereal golden eyes. The pred did it once to the assistant, a good, long stare, and it did send a shiver down their spine. It was a primal fear, being spotted by a predator, their belly obviously full of one of your fellow prey. But were they still hungry? Am I next? What was going on behind those eyes…? Even though the assistant of all people knew it was an act, they couldn’t help but endure those thoughts. 

Other guests let the assistant know that they thought it was obscene. A predator out in public, digesting a person alive, right in front of everyone? It was frankly unacceptable. And dressing them up didn’t make it any better. The assistant listened to these people sympathetically, but unfortunately for them, this was exactly the reaction that their boss wanted. 

The party went on and the pred laid down on a kind of mossy platform that the enclosure featured. They spread across it languidly on their side, belly resting heavily on the moss. They traced gentle patterns on it with a clawed fingertip, tracing the curves of the prey.

With a slightly sickening realisation, the assistant noticed the prey wasn’t struggling any more. They knew this was what happened when one put prey in the stomach of a predator, but they never had seen it happen in real time. They couldn’t help but feel a sense of injustice as the pred lay there smug, satisfied, petting at their engorged belly. 

The assistant shook the thought away. It’s what the boss wanted. What the boss wants, the boss gets. 

—

It was getting late, many guests had already left. The assistant looked for their employer, who wasn’t hard to find. 

“Boss,”

They were wearing all black, like an oil spill. 

“You’ve done well today,” they said, “I’m impressed, I’m inspired, I have so many ideas. Everyone was upset about it- it was great. And the predator…” they sighed. “Perfect. Maybe a little over the top with the costuming, but the idea came across perfectly.”

“Thank you.”

“They’re a keeper, don’t you think? I’d love to see them here again. In fact, let’s go over there right now.” The assistant was led back to the main room with the enclosure.

Another sinking feeling. The pred’s stomach was rounder, the curves that the pred had been tracing were faint if not non-existent. And now that the party had died down, the assistant could hear the stomach over the music growling, murmuring, with deep digestive gurgles. 

The boss clasped their hands together, “magnificent. Look at how far along they are already - what a brutally efficient stomach you have,” the boss said to the predator. 

The boss rarely complimented people. The pred rested a hand on their stomach, maybe self-consciously, and avoided looking at their audience. 

“They won’t acknowledge you,” the assistant reminded their boss, “by your request.”

“Oh I know.” the boss waved their hand, “and that is how I want it to be. More mysterious that way. People fear what they don’t understand, you know.”

—

After the party was over and the boss went home and to bed, the assistant still had work to do. Packing down, making sure everyone got paid. 

By the time they next saw the predator, they had reverted back to their former selves; wearing the clothes they arrived in, make up washed from their face (except for a faint gold smudge), and their eyes were brown and with pupils again. They looked tired. It was nearly 10am, they had been on location for over 12 hours by this point. Still, when they saw the assistant, they sat up straighter and anxiously waited to hear what they thought. 

The assistant looked down at the pred’s bloated stomach. They thought about warning them; They might not want to put up with the bosses’ antics. 

They should get out before it is too late. 

But then again, the boss wanted this pred, and what the boss wants, the boss gets. The assistant was the last person on the earth who would sabotage that.

So all they said was “well done,” and gave the pred an envelope with ten thousand dollars cash. They would be back.

[livglam06]

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[gayspock]

im just gonna do a big dump like i did with the last trek movies <3 soo first contact liveblog! wrow!

- first of all i havent seen these little guys in such a long time now! so im going to sayy hiyaaa to them all when they appear!

- i also dont kno ANYTHIN abt this movie going in. wrt, like, trek movies- shit i dont know much at all abt the tng ones... ive heard a few bad rumblings, but i cant remember anything specific? well. except for the fact. i knwo data has an emotion chip put him in at some point somewhere. 🤷 which makes me fume.... & i know kirk eats shit in generations. however thats abt it. i think ive not heard anything specifically BAD abt fc though, so :33

- i will say one thing i do worry mysself with the tng films, and i guess why i havent been inclined to watch them... mm. sigh. i mean this isnt such a hot take on tumblr dot com, no sir, but i dont really care THAT much for picard. fr fr - i dont, despite all the jokes, but it isnt THT serious like... i think he has the blueprint for someone i could actually be obsessed with, as a character, but im simply not fond of how he is used narratively. in tng i always took issue with that: how stories meant for other characters, kind of wrapped up as the captain picard show a lot of the time, especially when others were really robbed of so much depth; and similarly, times where i just was not fond of the way he was framed. i think its deffo more of a personal inclination, absolutely, but mmm...

- and see obviously tos does centre kirk in that way but im not so... mad about that? because it is, like, a scaled down cast: kirk, bones and spock are the main characters and it doesnt pretend any differently you know? i think my problem is when its like... an ensemble show. and moreover i think i also just dont care so much for a character, with picards personality, being at the helm of a show either. i think i'd be obsessed with him if he wasn't- but mm.... i dont know. i dont know.

- and i think the thing i am concerned abt is how the tng movies will kinda focus on him entirely and like. that IS my assumption but i guess it just hasnt made me so motivated to watch them - among other reasons why i havent finished the tos movies, alongside. and i think that its deffo like- THIS IS .... you know again. deffo more of a personal tastes thing. though there's faults there, they're definitely starker for me given my proclivities but overall i dont think its like. tng is like a terribly done show wrt the way it handles picard or that the movies would be if they centred him. its just not sth im gonna care abt i guess so why force it?

- and its like- when i say centre him... again its like i dont know. idk if thats the best way to articulate it. and furthermore, i guess- i guess my perspective of tng is also a little inherently warped overall bc i didnt enjoy it as much as many do . i know this to be the case <3 but mmhm... teehee.

- okay actually starting the film now

- OMGGG WOW<3 THE MATRIX LOOKING SILLYYYYYYY 😁

- also dear lord. i got the same shock when watching the tos movies initially- but the budget, or at least.... the money put into, like, the way its shot always kinda rattles me a little. like omg we're getting some funny little angles and special effects arent we. oh teeehee. oh youuu guyyssss must be having so much fun!!! <3

- WHAT THE DICKENS

- BEVS... YOUR HAIR. NAURRR!!! TROI! YOUR HAIR! NAUURRRRRR SAY IT ISNT SO!

- im going to throw up. why is him fucking blasting opera music with his eyes shut as the glasses shake so funny. bald man anxiety.

- sniff sniff. also i dont like this enterprise design. i feel like shes just a little dark.... a little grungy. and dont get it twisted oh im a grunge girl im always a fan. but goodness me. isnt it a little sniff sniff SAD?

- data said hell? data? sniff sniff...

-THAT IS NOT ADAM SCOTT IS IT YOU ARE LYING TO ME

- HE SCARED ME SO!!! HIS STUPID LITTLE VOICE SCARED ME SO TERRIBLY LIKE GOOD FUCKING HEAVENS.

- also that other bloke looked weirdly like chris pine. the hell.

- ANYWAYS CRAZY FOR ADAM SCOTT . HE KNOWS HOW TO PLAY A MAN HAVING A FUCKING ANXIETY ATTACK. THERE'S JUST SOMETHING ABOUT HIS VOICE THAT SOUNDS LIKE HES IN A CRISIS. LIKE INHERENTLY.

- OH THEIR UNIFORMS OH-

LOH WORF I LOVE YOUR LITTLE ONESIE, SO HELP. I KNOW THEYRE ALL WEARING THEM BUT THERES SOMETHING ABOUT IT ON HIM THATS GIVING MOM ITS MY TURN ON XBOX

- MAYBE ITS BC HES A BIG STRAPPIN LAD SO ITS JUST.... TUGGING CERTAINLY. IM NOT SURE. THE WAIST LOOKS REALLY HIGH UP ON HIS AND ITS FITTING WEIRDLY IT LOOKS TODDLERSQUE FOR REALS

- im crazy for riker and worf. because its like riker is just a bloke isnt he just. we love riker hes our big funny bloke. but in the vicinity of worf he has this sleeper agent "im justt a little guyyyy you wouldnt hit a little guy 😁" mode that activates sometimes. but only then and never anytime else bc it would never ever work otherwise bc its soooo not a good fit on him. unless worf is there acting as his little guy lubricant so it DOES fit right and proper

- i love bullshit time mechanics.

- can i say the soundtrack guy is having the time of their fucking life. like do do do do do. like literally no so true girlie pop.

- OH SAY WHAT YOU WILL ABOUT PICARD. THAT MAN KNOWS HOW TO WEAR A FUCKING COAT! DASHING TODAY, SIR. I CAN BARELY VCONTAIN THE URGE TO SLAP YOUR HEAD.

- THAT PRETTY LADY SAID A BAD FUCKING WORD?

- e

- e

- e

- e

- e

- e

- e everyone remember 19 minutes in where data does the funny fucking jumo that just sent me insane ofr soem reason

- i have to clip it when im dome watching

- data babygirl i cant tell how i feel about this outfit its like really like it does serve cunt but im not sure about it for you and furthermore i cant see a gilet without those tory memes coming to mind. sorry....

- "please, no lectures about the prime directive" with all due respect data just fucking fell from the ceiling in a lego figure pose and snapped to the ground and just stalked at her despite an onslaught of bullets AND you were all talking quite loudly about the fucking enterprise without checking shit... girlies we cant pretend we cant i love it i love silly trek logic but oh please!

- Is it me or is geordi fucking built right now

- tHE LOOK DATA IS GIVING HIM....-

- i think data should be allowed to just call him a fucking freak if he wants to. you know picard barely holds back when saying shit to him. i think data should just say something completely loathsome and when picard is like p. pardon he should be like you heard me you bald little twat.

-HELP troi is so funny. i hope they let her be her funny self.

-"captain. we might have to consider the fact he was killed in the attack." WHY DID SHE SOUND LIKE A MOTHER GENTLY TELLING HER CHILD THAT THEY CANT GO TO MCDONALDS. AND WHY DID PICARD RESIGN LIKE A KID WHO JUST REALISED THEYRE NOT GOING TO FUCKING MCDONALDS. GIRLS...

- yes YES YES ITS THE DOCTOR HIIIII HHIII. i missyou on voyager. sorry i havent been watching voyager i just kept getting vaguely frustrated with it. do you understand? kiss on the lips if you understand?

- THE SHEER AMOUNT OF SWAG ZEFRAM POSSESSES. YOU'RE TELLING ME THIS IS THE SAME BLOKE FROM TOS?

- YOU KNOW HOW, LIKE... sooo often shows will write prequels for characters and the such and they'll just butcher them entirely. how did this get it backwards. you made him fuck righteously whereas his later self is what one may call a fucking menace.

- OH SO DATADOES HAVE THE EMOTION CHIP? HUH. <- guy who did not watch generations

- again i dont care it makes me mad i already rambled abt why i dont like it but fucking whatever grrrr.

- so when they assimilate you into the borg do they not assimilate your ass with it

- sorry that was mean but if you cannot see from this blurry screenshot the borg costumes really fucking squashed their tushes right in like help...

- BESITE DATA DID YOU JUST SNAP THAT BLOKES NECK?

- BESTIE DATA LOBOTOMY TIME...

- ALSo geordi without his visor is odd getting used to it BUT i will say his facial structure is really nice. not tht it wasnt before but obvs the visor hid his cheekbones a little bit there

- im actually insane for zeffy's bejazzled backwards cap. im actually dripping with lust for it. no wonder solkar was so quick to gape fo rhim.

- WOWWWW THEY SAID THE NAME OF THE SHOW

- lily is also sooo pretty.... sorry to stop it at all to say that but she is like hell.

- also im not sure how i feel about there being a "borg queen". i think i found it more interesting when there borg were leaderless and just sort of...spread. i mean thats the vibe i always got. that all being said she's uhm. hehehehe. well uhm she is. (twirls hair)

- actually put a pin in that i do have an oc that i did wanna repurpose for FOREVER into a trek borg oc of some descriptor ...maybe one day girlies

- WHY IS THIS...

- MA'AM WOULD YOU PLEASE STEP AWAY FROM MY BESTIE.

- I DONT WANT TO SEE DATA CREAM HIS FUCKING JUMPSUIT?

- every time they try to give picard a swaggy moment it just flops for me. theres just something so utterly swagless about him. and you see theres the thing yes. i mean many different things when i say swaggless. sometimes its a pathetic little man all alone and wet and he's mine. sometimes thst means cradling him sometimes that means affectionately poking him with sticks. sometimes it means zefram from tos as opposed to the zeffo ofthis movie. but with picard its like you just dont have swag/. yuou will never have swag. its fine. you can be a little swagless man. but trying to have swag it just does not work.... so dont trye girlie. just be bald and look pretty.

- the NOODLE processor? :3 hahaha i have one of those its called my TUMMY. lol. jk i know you said neural, picard, but i like to be silly. dont you like to be silly?

- WHY THE FUCK IS BARCLAY HERE?

- lily just looking up, horrified, at worf, and him being like "I am a klingon🧍‍♂" whys that so funny to m

-YESe YES

- YES YES YES THESE BIG SILLY SUITS ARE EXACGTTTLLYYY WHAT IM LOOKING FOR OH TEEEHEEEE. ALSO STOP IT PICARD DONT MAKE WORF GO INTO ZERO GRAV DIDNT YOU HEAR HE WILL GET A POORLY FUCKING TUMMY

- ALSO data just going mental is my favourite but i will say sigh again i hate emotion chip data thats not my little fucking guy...

-...

- ....

- .......

- . theu are not bsout to make data shag....

- TW ON MOVIES FOR DATA HABING SEX PLEASE

- DOCTOR SOONG INITIALLY FOR YOUR BAD FATHERING TECHNIQUES I SENTENCE YOU TO 5 YEARS IN JAIL. HOWEVER FOR GIVING HIM A FUNCTIONING COCK AND BALLS I COMMEND YOUR BRAVERY BUT I WILL SENTENCE YOU TO BE SHOT IN THE HEAD.

- also i again say: i dont know how if eel about the borg queen. i get it for, like, the purposes of a movie? it makes sense to have her as a character. but again conceptually i dont know... i find it boring. i think it removes some of the inherent intrigue of the borg itself.

- and even WEORSE WHEN YOU HAVE HER HORNY FOR MY DEAR DATA MY GOODNESS FUCKING ME HELP

- EVEN IF IM A LITTLE HORNY FOR HER MYSELF LIKE LISTEN

- IM A LITTLE GUY

- AND DATA IS A LITTLE GUY SO SURE SO TRUE BUT YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN LADIES!

-literally lily get his ass get his ass GET HIS ASS

- my maths lecturer once parodied his little speech he makes to lily there if anyones wondering

- "actually i never read it" CAN WE LITERALLY KEEP LILY CAN SHE BE PART OF THE CREW NOW. OBSESSED WITH HER.

- the way i sobbed so bad in st iii when they blew up the enteprise but with this enterprise im like LOLLLLLL

- "DATA?" RESPECTFULLY DID YOU ONLY JUST REMEMBER HIM NOW, JEAN LUC?

- HES BEEN GETTING SLOPPY

- ZEFRAM BLASTING HIS TUNES I LOVE HIM SO BAD

- okay thank god hes staying behind for data but nonetheless this is so funny like oh god yes data is ina pretty tricky situation but i think he did get ridden robo style

- HELP I DOTNKNOW WHY BUT ITS SO SCARY TO THINK OF HIM AS BEING YOLKED

- LIKE OMG NO... PUT THEM FUCKING GUNS AWAY! FREAK!

- ALSO SORRY BUT THIS ENTIRE SCENE IS SO FUNNY WITH THEM ALL JUST TUGGING EAH OTHER DOWN LIKE HELP . WHY IS THAT LIKE. TICKLING ME SO . IM OBSESSED IM INSANE LIKE ITS THE BIG CLIMAX AND ITS LIKE JUST PULLING ON YA DAMN TROUSERS

- THE FACT HES KIND OF JUST HOLDING HER WRIGGLING TECHNO SKULL AND JUST SNAPPED HER SPINE OUT IS KINDA FUCKED YEAH. I MEAN SHE WAS A BIT EVIL WERENT SHE. BUT THAT WAS LIKE MY GOODNESS FUCKING GRACIOUS.

- data got that cursed dick by the way all the girlies to take it for a spin its like.... look where they fucking end up . my goodness fucking me! what are you....

- OMG HIIII ZEFFY HERE;S YOUR BOYYYFRIENDD LOL

- do you guys ever think... my goodness how old is zefram supposed to be again. hes not gen z is he. good fucking lord hes younger.

- HIII SOLKAR OH MY GODDDD LITERALLY STUNTING ON THEM WHAT DID I SAY HE REALLY DRESSED TO IMPRESS

- (zefram and solkar shaking hands) and picard is like "i think its time we made a discrete exit" . alright? fucking homophobe?

- CAN WE NT GET HIM A FUCKING HAT OR SOMETHING. WHAT IF HIS FUCKING WIRING GETS A BIT CHILLY....

- OKAY WHEW thats ending. i enjoyed it. its nice. :3 i liked the tos films more bc of my bias but it was cute.

- though again. sigh. i rlly wish the others guys would get a focus for once. i think thts again one of my things yknow. like goodnessss meeeee.... can i not hear from my little guys? sniff sniff. and- i'd talk more of it but its SO late now you must understand. wwellit is not but i have a train to catch in like 6 hours and im not ready LOL

[scope-dogg]

SSSS.Gridman: Final Thoughts

Even though I watched it during its original run in 2018 just three years ago, I felt compelled to rewatch this show thanks to its inclusion in the upcoming Super Robot Wars, where it’s most likely the most exciting new inclusion in the roster for many if not most. I don’t think I ever wrote a full review piece for it during that original run, so I’ll use this opportunity to sort that out. It was one of two mecha series made by Studio Trigger in 2018 (you could argue that it’s not a mecha series really, but that’s splitting hairs, the appeal of this and various super robot shows overlaps heavily,) the other being Darling in the Franxx. It was Franxx that was probably the most highly anticipated of the two, with Gridman, as the soft reboot of an old, not-especially-popular toku Ultra-series knockoff from the 90s, probably rating a fair bit lower on the hype charts. In the end, reality defied at least my expectations if nobody else’s, with Franxx being somewhat of a letdown and SSSS.Gridman turning out to be excellent. On a repeat viewing, my opinion has changed somewhat - this time I enjoyed it even more than the first time around. I truly think that it’s one of, if not the best mecha (or mecha-adjacent if you want to be picky) series to air in recent years.

The plot setup is that one day, highschooler Yuta Hibiki awakes in the house of his classmate Rikka Takarada with a problem - he’s lost all his memories. More concerning still, he’s the only one that can see the giant, silent, unmoving monsters towering over the city, and an armoured figure inside an old computer calling himself Gridman and telling Yuta that there’s something important that he must do. Before he has a chance to reach the sensible conclusion that he’s gone insane, a monster that’s indisputably real attacks. Yuta is sucked into the old computer, and merges with Gridman, allowing him to manifest as a giant defender in the real world to fight back. The next day, however, nobody except for Yuta and his friends remember anything about the giant monster attack, and the city is as good as new - with the only difference being that history seems to have been rewritten so that those who died at the hands of the monster were actually killed in unrelated circumstances years prior. Unbeknownst to Yuta, those killed were specifically singled out by the creator of the monster - the most popular girl in his class, Akane Shinjou. Yuta, his friends, Gridman and a band of peculiar new allies must fight to protect the lives of the innocents living in the city from monster attacks while attempting to figure out just what is going on.

The plot setup is strange, similar to that of the original 90s Toku series, but the show does an incredible job of selling you on it and drawing you in. You want to know more about what’s going on and what will happen next, and the show wastes admirably little of its short 12-episode runtime in delivering on the promise of its narrative. Each new episode manages to deliver both new revelations and fresh excitement in equal proportions - there’s basically nothing from this series that feels like it’s missing, yet also basically nothing that feels unnecessary either. I sometimes despair slightly how many more recent mecha anime have gotten shorter, with 12 or so episodes seeming to be the norm for all except the biggest new releases, but if all of them paced themselves as well as this show then it wouldn’t be an issue at all. I recently watched one very long old show in the shape of Heavy Metal L-gaim, and one shorter recent one in Knight’s and Magic, with the former feeling like it’s treading water for far too long and the latter skipping over too much in an effort to cram too much into a shorter run - Gridman, by contrast, is a superb example of how it should be done. That great pacing is in service of a surprisingly interesting plot, as well - it takes its interesting setup to even more interesting places, and ends up using them to address some interesting themes. To say too much would be to spoil it, which would be a disservice, but broadly it’s about how humans approach reality and the conflicts that issue from that.

That the series succeeds on this front is largely because of a really memorable cast of characters. While Yuta, the hero, isn’t especially memorable, Akane, the antagonist, is very much so - figuring out her deal is arguably the primary driving force behind the narrative. I honestly can’t say I can think of an antagonist in a mecha series that’s quite like her - though it’s revealed that she’s the villain in the first episode, you wouldn’t be likely to guess as much on seeing her for the first time, as she’s outwardly cheerful and seemingly normal - though it soon becomes apparent that this conceals a penchant for doling out incredibly harsh judgement for incredibly petty slights, just one aspect indicating a highly disturbed mindset. The show increasingly centres around her increasingly as it nears its climax, in a way that arguably makes her just as important to the narrative as the protagonists. The supporting cast are pretty excellent too, with standouts including Yuta’s firends Rikka and Utsumi, both of whom contribute to the plot in their own ways, Anti, a monster created by Akane disguised as a young boy who’s utterly obsessed with striking down Gridman and has an incredibly memorable character arc, and others besides.

Plot and characters are just one half of why the show’s so great though - the other half is its striking presentation. Trigger’s notable for animating with a very distinctive flair, whether that’s Kill la Kill or their also-excellent feature film Promare - after all, it’s made up by much of the talent that worked on Gurren Lagann. However, their approach to SSSS.Gridman was different, if no less striking for different reasons. For me, the show’s aesthetic is defined above all else by the contrast between the ordinary and the extraordinary. The show puts a great deal of effort into portraying mundane things - city streets, school halls and the like - and then contrasting that against the bizarre and spectacular. A great example of this are the frequent shots of busy streets full of people minding their own business, completely unaware of the mysterious, ominous monsters towering over everything quietly in the background. This even leaks through into the one scenes are directed - most of the dialogue is written in a way that feels very natural, with people talking to one another much how you’d expect them to in real life, over mundane topics, even as strange and spectacular things are happening around them. It has a double effect of enhancing the air of mystery around the strange aspects of the world, and also making the spectacular events, especially the battles between Gridman and monsters, seem all that more exciting when they come around. The mechanical and monster designs alike are spectacular, and their battles are blockbuster events. The show uses a mix of 2D and 3D animation for these. While 3D generally has probably finally reached a stage where it’s generally good enough to stand in for traditional 2D animation, at least for mechanical fights, few other shows exhibit the level of mastery that Trigger exhibit when using it in this series - largely due to their deft blending it with traditional 2D for certain shots, and fantastic judgement of when to use what manner of animation. Much of the battle animation even pays homage to classic super robot shows of the past. Ultimately, I think this show’s action is close to the top of the pile when it comes to mecha shows in general - but as I said earlier it’s the blend of the ordinary and extraordinary that makes it really stand out, and the same level of care was put into the most mundane scenes. The result is a beautiful and exquisitely detailed series from beginning to end.

Overall, I think SSSS.Gridman stands out, not just within this era, which is arguably a relatively weak one as far as mecha shows are concerned, but even within the grander body of work of mecha shows as a whole - which nobody would have expected from a followup to a hokey old 90s toku show. While their recent feature film Promare was also a spectacular accomplishment from the studio, I think this show’s probably my favourite thing that Trigger’s put out in their lifespan thus far. With one worthy sequel having already aired this year in the form of SSSS.Dynazenon, another still in the pipeline, and the series achieving entry into Super Robot Wars, it’s already starting to accrue the legacy that it arguably deserves as an instant modern classic.

[naturedust]

The Arcana characters during the Covid-19 pandemic: Part 1 (Asra, Julian, Valerius)

hi everyone! i felt really happy whilst writing this. in each set of headcanons, the apprentice lives with that character! i don’t specify if there’s anything romantic or sexual going on between them though. this is VERY detailed, i’m still writing out muriel, nadia, portia, and lucio’s headcanons so they’ll come in part 2 <3 i hope you enjoy!! AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27529276/chapters/67324228

Asra

asra hosts weekly magic workshops (covering very very basic magic) with the apprentice over microsoft teams 💻 each workshop has a small fee, with all proceeds going to local vesuvian charities like mask suppliers, and food banks (who he tries to donate extra food to every week) supporting the poorest amongst their population. it was the apprentice who first suggested he do this, on a day he was feeling really afraid in the face of the pandemic.

i think he has days when he feels really helpless and trapped – and it runs a little deeper than cabin fever and restlessness. other than the pain he’d experience if he lost the apprentice again, being unable to do things freely is the worst situation he can think of... as much as asra prioritises the apprentice’s mental health, he doesn’t practice emotional expression a lot. he truly strives to be there for the apprentice and even when he remembers how they suffered after coming back...asra only cries silently at night when they are asleep – when he knows they can’t hear him. 

that’s part of the reason why he’s always seemed so mysterious in the game — growing up without his parents meant that he learnt to push down his fear and put on a brave face... and one of the reasons why he goes on trips without much explanation is to escape reality for a bit. he lets his vulnerability show only on the worst of days (like the day the apprentice died). on days where asra feels really afraid of the world and defeated, the apprentice takes over his shop duties and brews much more lapsang souchong than usual to comfort him. so much that even passerbys outside the shop are caught in the smokiness of it! unlike the red plague, every community in the world is affected, and there is nowhere for asra to escape to. this includes nopal. after vesuvia’s Covid-19 situation gets better though, he and the apprentice stay there sometimes as a mini vacation of sorts and it brings him peace 🏜

asra’s leading an effort to make high quality masks more accessible to vesuvians. in fact, that local mask provider i mentioned earlier is his initiative. he set it up after seeing people buy all the beaked plague doctor masks (the PPE of vesuvia) that actual working doctors need access to. he would never admit it but, when asra thinks about the doctors, julian is the first who comes to mind. anyways, the masks asra designs are stunning. he spends tireless nights testing their 3-ply efficacy, and they aren’t just plain blue or white – there are intricate details imprinted on them through his magic 🔮 

i think asra would also be really into coming up with new herbal concoctions for customers, after he notices how tired people look from being indoors all day – for example, he’s developed an immune system-boosting drink that’s a gorgeous swirly purple colour 🍶 it’s similar to traditional chinese medicine. also he only uses ethically sourced, 100% local herbs (by local, i mean from nopal and the tarske forest, where muriel helps him collect wildflowers and herbs!!)  🌿 he uses spells to counter the toxicity of his favourite belladonna flower and it becomes a superfood staple of his concoctions

he goes out every couple of days just to gather herbs and ingredients for aforementioned concoctions, always prioritising the ones he makes for the apprentice and always making those sweeter, taking more time to create colourful depths in them that resemble galaxies. asra also makes particular effort to bring back a wide range of fruits from his local trips as it always cheers the apprentice up 🍈

asra invents the most effective, affordable, environmentally-friendly, non-toxic and skin-friendly hand sanitiser and because this magician is the sweetest person ever and cares much more about people’s lives than making a profit during the pandemic, he shares the recipe online for free & magicians all around the world recreate the hand sanitiser for their local neighbourhoods. he’s since been featured in a couple of “Top 10 People You Should Follow” lists in business magazines and there’s an online petition with over 200k signatures calling for his nobel prize nomination lol. asra insists he doesn’t care about fame but when the apprentice laughs about these recognitions, they always notice asra’s eyes crinkling

asra would also become a lot more active on his youtube channel. that’s right, he’s always had a youtube channel, he’s just had a million hiatuses because of all his adventures. he has around 20,000 subscribers (and a similar amount on instagram...his feed is colourful and full of pictures depicting his travels, the shop, and above all, the apprentice). since he’s decided to stay at the shop with the apprentice – who is actually a little more vulnerable than others to viruses, because of their “reborn” form – he has the time to post weekly videos again. i think asra wouldn’t want to show his face in any of the videos, and not on his instagram either... and it’s got nothing to do with his self-esteem – he just wants the focus to be on what he’s doing rather than how he looks. the videos vary from very domestic vlogs with titles like “what two magicians do in a day” to packed af guides like “🐍 SPELLS TO REFINE AT HOME 🐍” & “crystals that can calm you during these times” and his wildly popular “carving crystals i mined: in real time” ⏳ the apprentice is a permanent fixture in all of them <3 viewers always assume they’re together and whether they are or not...that’s for you to think about ;)

asra is big on healing crystals and gemstones. like really, really big on them. he always makes sure to inform his customers and audiences that they are alternatives and not substitutes, and that sicknesses need real medicine & they can’t just wear a crystal in place of a mask (bc that’s happened before and he felt so guilty for carving and selling the crystal in question) what’s strange is, even though he usually sources his crystals from other countries during his travels, there seem to more than ever all around the shop and the apartment upstairs..

when the apprentice asks about it, it turns out that asra goes mining alone in nopal! he doesn’t really like to mine the actual desert as he’s only ever dug up gold and silver there. one time, he accidentally stumbled upon a cave at the edge of nopal and – ever the curious wandering magician – he ventured deep within it and found amazing crystals and gemstones everywhere 💎 he never mentioned it to the apprentice because he always thought it was too dangerous for them to go, until they remind him it’s dangerous for him too. from that day onwards they go looking for crystals every weekend together :’)

if asra was living alone, he would be fine with just wearing a mask to go outside. but since he lives with the apprentice – and especially after what happened during the red plague – he’s not risking ANYTHING. he wears aviator goggles and eco-vinyl gloves when he’s in the market, just to be extra safe, though when he’s out foraging he takes off his mask because there’s usually no one else there & it’s way too humid. the apprentice likes to make fun of how steampunk he looks & the way the big goggles make his hair extra poofy  🤍 

Julian

julian is on the frontlines of the vesuvian pandemic response. with his experience as a doctor – specifically, a frontline doctor during the red plague who discovered the cure (!!!) – he is revered by new doctors and nurses, most of whom are volunteers. when the pandemic first begins, there aren’t formal hospitals or medical schools set up in vesuvia, so he has to make do by reopening his clinic in the centre city, as an alternative to valdemar’s one in the palace – which, quite frankly is the stuff of nightmares for most of the population

as you know, julian is universally loved by the vesuvian people... so the waiting list of the hospital branch he works at is ALWAYS full. patients always report how gentle and attentive he is and how comforted they feel in his presence. even though he has to wear a hazmat suit and the plague doctor beak mask, he is known for visiting the most severely affect Covid-19 patients and holding their hands in their last moments.

the apprentice brings different flowers to put inside his beak mask every day (this is a headcanon that i’m pretty sure originated from the writer telanaris on AO3!!) to give julian some small comfort amongst all the death and suffering he’s witness to every day. they go out to the tarske forest or even to nopal with asra, or sometimes alone. because julian mentioned wolfsbane was his favourite flower once, the apprentice picked some without knowing that they’re poisonous. long story short, they blacked out and woke up in his clinic with an extremely worried julian nearly in tears launching into a self-blame monologue, about to black out himself from staying by their side the whole night

i also think julian would be featured in the news a lot and sometimes pretty randomly. he gives official weekly Covid-19 updates on the main vesuvian tv news channel – though the apprentice stands in for him after the first two weeks (he tries very hard to refuse their help because he doesn’t want to burden them, even though they assure him they actually want to relieve him of at least one of his burdens since he’s a full-time pandemic doctor – and because he almost fainted from exhaustion the second time. the apprentice kindly, but sternly asks him to take care of himself too, as he does everyone else)

he would just be on the news in general too...his random acts of kindness would go viral on social media – “Vesuvian Doctor Helps Elderly In Race for Toilet Paper.” ❤️ “Local Doctor Delivers Groceries for Struggling Families.” and his “grandmothers” in nevivon always get excited when they see him on the news and send letters to congratulate him (much to his embarrassment). julian would also go viral on twitter. one photo of him has 100k retweets: “oh my fcking god i just rounded the corner and there’s this really fucking t a l l man handing out free bottles of sanitiser. i don’t need to see him under his plague beak to know he’s hot af HELP” and the apprentice would retweet it saying “so proud of my bf” and the internet would go wild over this comment. it’s up to you to decide if they’re actually together or not hehe bc who knows the apprentice might’ve meant best friend 🤷🏻‍♀️

he sets up a youtube channel with no profile picture or description to upload a single video... “How to PROPERLY use hand sanitiser!” and all the comments are just about his looks and voice 😚 it reaches cities outside of vesuvia and because the hand sanitiser in the video is locally made (by asra!) it quickly becomes sold out by either those who don’t know how to do magic or people without access to the products being replicated by other magicians... because a lot of them actually marked up the price :(  + even communities that are afraid of magic buy it because asra’s detailed method and julian’s instructive marketing combined are that effective. a power couple... in another life, perhaps 💫

julian would then be invited to do a city-sponsored video guide on how to wash your hands (the idea is helmed by nadia, of course, who recognises the usefulness of his newfound fame). not only would he be extremely exhausted from full-day shifts, he’d also be overthinking to the point of hyperventilation before filming starts – but he surprises the apprentice with how professional and clear he is in the videos. a true thespian at heart, instead of happy birthday, he improvises on set and sings an old tune from nevivon instead as he washes his hands for 20 seconds 🌊 lemme just say...his hands also go viral lol. also, julian could be a tik tok star if he wanted to. he’s certainly got the moves for it, and can easily achieve the e-boy vibe – plus, he’s gone viral on there several times already!

even though julian doesn’t seem to care when he’s in danger, he’s very meticulous when it comes to the apprentice’s safety. living through his second pandemic and working with patients first hand means that he is very aware of how severe the situation is. every morning he prepares a 99:1 water:bleach ratio spray to spray his shoes when he comes home. he refuses to even touch the apprentice (for fear of passing on anything from the clinic) before he’s taken off his mask, thrown it away safely – then showering and washing his hair thoroughly.

having grown up in nevivon, i like to think that julian is really environmentally conscious, especially with regards to the sea. he used to go diving in the sea to retrieve trash, and as a young man he made a habit of going to the docks every weekend to remove plastic containers and wires from around the necks of salt seals 🌫. so, no matter how tired he is, when he comes home to the apprentice, julian never forgets to snip the ear loops of his surgical masks in half, as he knows sea creatures can get caught up in them. i’m sure he makes a second youtube video at some point to talk about this issue. tldr julian is an environmental activist <3

Valerius

so it’s been a long while since valerius was freed from you-know-who. his personality has definitely changed a lot since then... he’s back to his old and real self (which we never really saw in the game) 🌄 he works side by side with nadia now, not only as colleagues but also genuine friends, and he oversees the health department. he sets up dozens of hospitals and more general clinics in and out of vesuvia, consulting experienced doctors in vesuvia like julian as well as officials from neighbouring countries and states. as a side note, valerius is actually a very humble person and the most attentive listener you will ever meet. people from neighbouring governments & royal households admire him immensely as a result <3

out of everyone, i think valerius would be the most careful during the pandemic. during the red plague he witnessed lucio’s illness up close and it’s had a profound impact on him. he worries about the apprentice, a lot. more than anyone who knows him expects him to. he’s always the first to notice and remind them if their mask is falling down their nose, or if they’re about to rub their eyes with unwashed hands. you will never catch him forgetting to wear a mask or touching his face at all when he’s outside. he takes the time to use disinfectant wipes to clean everything he brings back home one by one, and though valerius is adamant it’s not the apprentice’s responsibility (because most of the things are usually files from the palace he has to go through before the next morning or things he brings back from the market) the apprentice always insists they want to help out :’) so it becomes a nice daily evening ritual, sitting together on the floor after returning from the palace, cleaning their things in silence together 💜

speaking of things he buys, valerius loves the marketplace. he discovers it one day by accident when looking for a bouquet of 🌹 red roses 🌹 to bring back for the apprentice, who was particularly upset that day after helping valerius out at the new hospitals and not being able to help any of the patients as much as they would have liked with their magic. when valerius stumbles across the marketplace, he is absolutely amazed by the colours and smells that surround him. he spends a lot of his free time and lunch hours looking through jewellery stalls – especially hairpins and hair sticks. 

anyone looking at him would be able to see how much care valerius puts into maintaining his hair. because he washes his hair every day (to avoid bringing any Covid-19 related germs into bed), and because being free from you-know-who has made him a lot more open to magic... not to mention because he actually lives with the apprentice now 💜 i think valerius would also consult asra about magical hair masks and conditioners, to keep his very long and thick hair healthy and soft, despite washing it every day.

he knows from accidentally overhearing asra a long time ago that the apprentice loves pumpkin bread, so he asks around for hours until he finally finds the baker’s stall 🍞 it takes hours because valerius is really bad with directions and gets lost a few times... it doesn’t help that he’s distracted by all the different foods and jewellery that he’s never seen before (he picks up a nice ring for the apprentice, and yes he’s so attentive and familiar with jewellery that he guesses their ring band size correctly). from that day onwards, once or twice a week, he wakes up a little earlier than usual to sneak out of his estate and buy the bread, so that the apprentice can enjoy it – freshly made, warm, and their favourite – for breakfast 🥣

yes, he has an estate (this mr. darcy-like headcanon is from jane_ways on AO3!!) and he treats his household employees very well, offering paid leave for all of them so that they can stay with their own families. in their absence, he proves to be an incredible cook, albeit a little rusty because he hasn’t cooked anything substantial since being under you-know-who’s influence and because he’s been too busy at the palace to eat anything that isn’t catered. 

due to social distancing, the apprentice and him eat in a lot more – valerius is very ambitious and soon moves past making homemade dishes... he cooks blown out, elaborate dinners and prepares creative and (visually) beautiful packed lunches to bring to work 🍴 whenever the apprentice has to work late he brings them dinners inspired by the colours of the shop that day – he is hesitant to admit it, at first, but he’s always admired the crystals there, and he is often inspired by them in his food presentations. asra is ever perceptive and gifts him a few (polished amethyst because he used to be an insomniac, black tourmaline and selenite to keep you-know-who at bay 💎) soon after the apprentice frees him from the curse

i really see valerius as someone who against all expectations is really into hands-on work like welding and carving – things that can get messy. he’s slowly trying to get rid of it, but since he first started working at the palace he’s maintained a very prim and posh appearance. he really loves to weld jewellery like rings and earrings. before the pandemic began, he took a few classes in the marketplace – classes which are on hiatus now, of course. he's set up a little studio in his estate and wears a blacksmith’s apron and goggles and everything. it’s honestly quite the sight. whenever the apprentice is working longer hours at the shop making potions with asra, he goes into the studio to continue his projects. some of the ones he’s proudest of are: the pure-silver wine rack, the gold headbands and rings he makes for himself – and then for the apprentice too when they keep “borrowing” his – and his favourite of all is his first ever project: the cast iron skillet that took him over a week to weld. he hand engraved the apprentice and his initials onto its handle <3  you don't need to read any of this as a romantic gesture, because friends can definitely do the same!

i like to think that prakra managed the pandemic especially well, and that valerius sits down to have zoom calls with queen nasrin to discuss ways the two places can collaborate and help each other 👑 she becomes his mentor of sorts, as he’s still relatively young and inexperienced when it comes to governing a city-state like vesuvia. when nasrin visited nadia before at the palace, she was not a fan of valerius at all and was just as wary of him as nadia was. however she becomes very fond of him as a result of their collaboration, and even starts to see him as a son ❕ other than the apprentice, nasrin would be the second person valerius talks the most freely with. initially he is very reluctant to share anything about his life, let alone his past before landing the consul job – but he eventually opens up and nasrin plays a role in helping him move past his failures (his eyes are opened after the apprentice frees him, and he feels immense shame from how he didn’t lead vesuvia very successfully in nadia’s absence)

[kimamanitranslate]

Filled It With My Feelings Text Translation

Sorry it took so long, but I finished the text translation of Filled It With My Feelings, the Senyuu 10th anniversary book! I didn’t translate the Season 1 Episode 1 redraw though because I’m sure we can all recite what happens in there by heart at this point. 

As it’s an illustration book, the translation is meant to be read along with the pictures - you can purchase the digital PDF of the book at hiaruron.booth.pm/items/2329424. You should be able to purchase it through PayPal or some international credit cards.

I’ve included the text under the cut, but you can also read it on the Google Docs here. 

Please note I do not give permission to anyone to use this translation for scanlations. There’s a reason why I’m posting this as a text translation rather than as a scanlation - it reads perfectly fine along with the raw book.

However, feel free to use this for text-only translations to different languages, just send me a message about it.

Page 1

Title: Filled It With My Feelings 10th. senyu.

Page 2

<no text>

Page 3

[Panel 1] SFX (Slime): *squeak* SFX (sword): *slam*

[Text Paragraph]

The story of Senyu first arrived on Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010 at 12:39 PM. Naturally, at that point, the name “Senyu” didn’t yet exist - a email was sent to my inbox entitled “A discussion about a new project.”

It was a rather vague email with few details, but at the time, I  was working as a day labourer in a certain distribution centre in Tokyo’s Ota Ward. As I hauled around boxes, my days were filled with uneasy thoughts of my future- I gave up on becoming a mangaka, I started work at an anime company but I quit there too, what am I going to do from now on? So I pounced on that vague email- Maybe this will shine some clarity into my life!

Senyu. was the product borne out of that email, and to my great appreciation, it really did shine clarity into my life. My future, which had been dark and uneasy, was illuminated bright by the light of Senyu. I would like to say that was why I made the protagonist’s name “Alba” - which means dawn - but unfortunately, that isn’t the case. I only learned the meaning of Alba’s name later - it was a total coincidence. 

Anyways, a lot has happened, but it’s now Senyu’s tenth anniversary.

Thank you very much. I never thought that I could continue for this long. This is all thanks to all of you, for supporting me all this way. 

Senyu. is a part of my life at this point - I don’t plan to end it any time soon, so I will be counting on everyone for their continued support.

Haruhara Robinson.

Page 4

Alba

While this may be obvious, the character I’ve spent the most time with in this work no longer feels like a mere “character” to me. 

He had a beta design with bangs. But since I thought he might seem more cheerful with his forehead showing, I settled on his current design. I intended to give him a haircut that was similar to characters like Kirimaru, but my lack of artistic skills at the time ended up giving him a hairstyle with a bizarre composition. 

I struggle now with how to draw his hair well.

Hero Symbol

I’ve always liked the idea of accessories that had the symbol of a hero, so wanting to have the same concept in my own work, I did my best to think up a design. I was really happy when it came out as merch.

Page 5

Ros

His backstory is really something!

I feel like he carried the entirety of Senyu’s serious plotlines on his back. I thought of Senyu. as like a story that uses the protagonist Alba to give the completed story of Hero Sion a happy ending? 

There were times when I was drawing things out that I thought, He feels kinda pitiful? But then in the story, Ros says, “Don’t judge people as pitiful by your own standards,” so then I thought, I-I’m sorry.

His equipment at the start was supposed to be like a machine that let him whip around his heavy sword like it was nothing, but everything ended before I explained any of that.

Page 6

Rchi

At the start, I just thought of her as a cute little girl. But gradually, she grew darker and darker, and by now, the dark aspects of her personality are a part of what makes her unique as a character.

Her hair accessory often disappears. Near the start, there was the explanation that it was confiscated when they were arrested, but beyond that it’s just because I forgot to draw it.

There was an explanation for why she was naked under her cloak during her first appearance, but I’ve forgotten it. I believe it was because since she was camping outside, she washed herself outside as well but her clothes were blown away by the wind - so she wrapped an old cloth around herself…?

Page 7

Foyfoy

The name “Foyfoy” was decided by an audience poll. At first, I was planning to make him Chinese-inspired, but before I realized it that concept had disappeared. His mark is leftover from that original idea.

Foyfoy’s hairstyle is one I drew often when I was a student. I often gave rivals or secondary main characters this hairstyle. 

I’m glad I could draw a design like this in an official work.

Page 8

Alles

A character drawn specifically with boobs that a Haruhara who was too embarrassed to draw boobs drew because “I can’t run from boobs!” The reason why I stopped drawing her midway through isn’t because of my embarrassment, but because I wasn’t used to drawing them, so since I never practiced it, I forgot how to.

Princess-chan

TL: This is written with the kanji for “Princess” rather than the katakana for “Hime” as her name is usually written.

She was meant to be a cute, elegant girl, so it shocked me when she immediately ended up as a violent character from her first appearance.

Since I hadn’t decided on a name for her, in the anime her name was listed as ???. I caused trouble for the anime staff.

Page 9

Rudolf

I can’t help but feel that eldery soldiers are cool. When I was doodling for fun, I often drew eldery soldiers.

Himendam

I thought of a development where a cute girl pops out from a nice big suit of armour, so I created the Himendam.

At the time, I thought, “This is a pretty unusual development, it’s great!” but now that I think back on it, it’s actually pretty common.

Slime

The first monster to appear. The first monster you fight should be a slime! Slimes should be blue! I’ve been influenced by Dragon Quest in that way.

I had this child of mine show up as your standard old monster in order to increase the impact of the panda who would show up right after.

Page 10

Minister

While I honestly have no idea why the minister is always standing next to the king, usually that’s the case in RPGs, right? 

So I had him stand next to the king in the same way. I feel as though his overall image is influenced by Magical Circle Guru Guru’s Kaya. While I hadn’t realized it while designing him, Kaya’s design affected me unconsciously.

The King

His whole thing was “a super serious old man that makes a stupid face during funny scenes,” but before I realized it, his stupid face became his default expression.

He just may be the nastiest character in the series, considering he wrapped up the entire world in his schemes for his own personal desires.

Mob Characters

The mob characters in my work tend to have this face. I like how they tend to make cutting comments while having non-descript faces.

Page 11

Suit

When Ros’ design went from complicated equipment to this thing, I was shocked at how much easier it was to draw.

I think this thing was what triggered me striving for easiness in my work. Can I blame everything on this thing instead of me? 

Just kidding, it’s all my fault.

Fake Foyfoy

If you don’t make careful enough observations, you can’t make a perfect disguise, and you end up in an idiotic costumed-character-like disguise. I wanted to use this plot device a few times more after this, but I didn’t have any chance to use it at all.

Mii-chan

Haruhara happens to have had a stuffed animal for as long as he can remember, and he still has it since he’s never been able to throw it away. I feel as though that stuffed animal served as the model for Mii-chan. In terms of his colour and overall atmosphere.

But my stuffed animal isn’t a pervert like him!

Page 12

Samejima

A delinquent overflowing with manliness. What’s with his hairstyle, I wonder. It’s actually pretty easy to draw. 

He just might never lose against anyone so long as he thinks, “There’s no way I can lose.”

Januar

I stuffed in everything my little sister likes into his appearance. “Straight-cut bangs, black-haired, one-eyed, droopy eyes.” But it isn’t as though I went and got her feedback directly so she might just tell me, “He’s not my type at all.”

I chose his personality based on my tastes- “A kind idiot.”

Page 13

Teufel

I thought of a “butler who doesn’t obey orders” around the same time as a “soldier who doesn’t listen to what you say.”

I wanted to have him appear at some point in the future, but then I saw a book called The After-Dinner Mysteries in a book store, which made me think- “M-m-m-m-maybe this book has a butler who doesn’t obey orders as well?!” So I panicked, ran back home, and drew out the head butler’s story. 

That’s why the head butler’s story was shoved in out of nowhere.

I read The After-Dinner Mysteries after I wrote in all the butler plot devices I wanted to use, and it was interesting.

At the start, Ros had his three burrs hairstyle so his design was differentiated from Teufel’s, but from Season 2 forwards I struggled with differentiating them. 

So Teuf-kun has been going through some small design changes, a bit at a time.

Page 14

Nisepanda

Before Dwango reached out to me, there was a manga I thought up with the plot “a zoo with an easily deceived curator.”

I planned to have a nisepanda appear in that work. The plot device was, “They thought it was a panda, but they were given a mysterious lifeform instead.”

Death Hot Dog-kun

A character that was born during the enthusiastic atmosphere during a meeting with my editor.

We happened to be eating hot dogs during the meeting.

I barely ever have these meetings for my other works, but for Senyu, I’ve been having meetings like this for years. So through sheer enthusiasm and cheer, things like mysterious characters and plot devices end up being created during the meetings.

Page 15

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Page 16

Dezember

Mysterious characters in manga often show up with their face cast in shadows. Dezember was born because I thought, “Why not make those shadows real?” But he ended up as a cooler character than I expected, using his shadows to attack and such.

I wanted to base him off of a toy for future plot developments, but I’m really glad I decided to based him off of dice. He became a really good character.

August

I think he’s actually a really nice person.

My editor for Main Quest really liked August, so whenever they got the chance they tried to push for more August.

Avril

A character that’s rather rare for Senyuu - one that just genuinely does bad things for bad reasons. I planned to draw her as really evil so you could tell she was a bad person, but she ended up just casually munching on bread - it really surprised me.

Neun

Back when his only appearance was a silhouette, I just wanted to make people think of that character at first. But now that I really think about the design I thought up for him after - isn’t he pretty cute?

Juli

Just like Foyfoy, I often drew characters with this hairstyle back when I was a student. I usually gave it to trustworthy ally characters. I like his design and personality quite a bit - sorry I haven’t used you much…

Page 17

The Shadows

It’s super cool to be able to split your body for each die face. I also feel like it’s a great character setting that each split has his own personality. A thought just crossed my mind - couldn’t I draw a manga just based around the Dezembers’ home life? 

...I guess it would end up like Osomatsu-san...? 

Page 18

Zwei

I wanted to use the concept that she was old despite her looks because she was a demon, so I had her dentures fly out - but now that I think about it, there’s other old demon characters, including some characters older than Zwei. So that would make her dentures a result of her own problematic lifestyle, not because of her old age…

Wanna Stab~

A mob among mobs, who ranked high in a popularity poll. I shall now grant him a name - “Phoenix the Rich”.

Mortmome

The stuff on his shoulder does some mysterious things, preventing his body from turning as well when the drill turns.

Page 19

The Great Mage

The cape he wears is very warm. His research assistants gifted him the cape as a present for his birthday sometime in his later years of life, as they were worried about his health. That’s why Alba always wears the cape.

Elf

He’s meant to be someone who knows the secrets of the world - but I can’t count the number of times I considered whether it would be better to just make him a regular old funny character. Good on you for surviving through all that, Elf!

Alf

While I did want there to be a “Elf’s best friend” character, I hadn’t thought about his name at all. So when it came time for him to appear, I really struggled with it. I wanted to make his name like Alba and Ros (Albatross) or Salt and Lake (Salt Lake)…

I may have struggled the most with Alf’s name among all my characters, considering I usually just pick names on instinct. 

Page 20

Salt and Lake and Lym

The Hero Academy trio. At first, I planned for Salt to become the Demon Lord, but when I sat down to draw everything out, Lake ended up in that role - it really shocked me.

I had always planned for the story to shift from the adventure setting of Seasons 1 and 2 to the school setting of Season 3. Though the end result is completely different from what I imagined. 

Season 3 was really fun to draw since it defied my expectations at every turn.

Page 21

Lyman

I wanted to draw a pathetic older man. I also want his scar to be because of some pathetic reason like “He tripped at a bar.”

Elmer

I reused the soldier design I thought up prior to thinking up Alba and Ros. He’s a little older than Rchi.

Justice

Justice is her ally. In other words, I wanted to make a character where no matter what she does, “I’m doing it, so it’s just!”

But it was too difficult to figure out how to deal with a character like that, so I ended up just making a regular old hotheaded reckless character. 

In the end though, she ended up as a character I quite like.

Page 22

Grandpa

A character who loves money. Since I love characters who love money, he’s a character that’s fun to use. It doesn’t actually have to be money, I like characters true to their own desires in general.

Hasegawara-kun

He was originally meant to be a silent character, but I got the urge to make him talk right before I was going to send in the manuscript. Since I wouldn’t make it if I typesetted his speech, I wrote his lines myself. By writing his lines in a way that can only be expressed through handwriting, I made it seem like I planned that from the start.

I made his speech typesetted again after I did that plot where he speaks super eloquently. 

Rib Man

He requires no explanation! 

It was funny when he moved in the anime.

Page 23

Sochi and Co.

There’s a game called Medabots - in that game, a character called Samantha leads a three-person team called the Screws. I’ve always liked that team since I was a kid. And then, I learned that my editor for Senyu was close with people who were involved with creating the original Medabots. So I had my editor tell them, “I want to put in characters I respect! Please leave it be!” 

Please google the Screws that I respect, I respect them.

Lucop

I had vaguely thought up what was going to happen until the end of season 4 of Senyu. But since I’ve done everything I originally thought up, F5 - which I’m drawing now - is all based on plot developments I thought up in +. 

-I’ve been saying that for a while now. Lucop as well was just a throwaway joke at first. But as I started moving him around, amazing developments like “Huh? No way… you had a past like this…?” burst out of him, and so he became the current Lucop.

Page 24

Midnight

A travelling doctor. As he treats his patients, he’s also searching for a cure to Mom’s mysterious disease. He’s a completely normal person with no special powers. He wanted Alba to become strong through his own power, not through familial connections.

Cecily

A mother who adores her children. I think it’s pretty amazing that she managed to raise Lake up herself and send him off to school despite being blown off to a mysterious place out of nowhere.

Page 25

Rchimedes the Second and his wife

Rchimedes the Second and his wife. (T/N: Yes, it’s written twice.)

Daromeon-san, who’s currently illustrating Kengan Ashura, was the one to draw the ridiculously beautiful backgrounds in the flashback arc in Season 2 when the Second was imprisoned. When I complained that I couldn’t draw it, he drew me amazingly beautiful.backgrounds. 

The Second’s design is based off of a mysterious preconception I have that “Demon Lords should wear raggedy capes.” Mama’s design is based on those soothing, kind moms you often see in anime.

The Mana Maker that he holds in this picture isn’t any particular Mana Maker. I just wanted to let a Mana Maker show up in a group picture.

Page 26

Rchimedes

While he’s tremendously evil, he ended up being quite loved. The Senyu characters I designed near the start wear clothes that I would never design now - I really think it’s amazing. Why did I dress him up in a jumpsuit when I decided to draw a Demon Lord?

On a side note, I imagined that the white part of his clothes peels off smoothly like tape if you pull at it from his neck. 

Crea

Since he took back his body from Rchimedes, his height shouldn’t have changed, but for some reason he mysteriously shrunk. 

Page 27

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Page 28

Originia

In a way, the story of these three marks the start of Senyu. Originia comes from me messing around with the the word “Original”. 

Rchimedes' scariest era just might be when he was living alone with Sion in Originia. Even though at first glance, it seems like he was living a peaceful, cheerful life with Sion, though occasionally getting beat up by him. But in reality, just what was he thinking deep inside, as he lived out his life, watching Crea and Sion?

Since I’m the author, I can generally imagine what my characters think just by thinking about it. But when it comes to Rchimedes during this time, all that comes to mind is “Scary scary scary”, and I can’t really think any further in detail.

I’m often asked “What’s Rchimedes’ original eye colour?”, but I think it was probably blue. I feel like I drew his eyes as blue somewhere, but I can’t remember…

Crea’s clothes slung around his shoulders that don’t fall off for whatever reason are actually sewn on - that’s why they don’t fall off. Crea sewed it on himself. While his threadwork is rough, it’s very sturdy. I think it’s wild and cool.

I showed a bit of what Sion did in the main story, but he generally did things like hauling supplies for hunting, looking far in the distance since his eyes are good, and going shopping in far-off cities for the village. Things like that.

Page 29

The two from Season 4 Episode 0

The two from Elf and Alf’s universe. Since Rchimedes’ magic research hasn’t progressed that much, they mostly fight with brute force. Since Crea never had his body stolen, he’s doing well. (He’s not doing well at all.)

Page 30

Creasion

When I was a kid, I read in a manga, “‘Hero’ isn’t something you call yourself - it’s a title you’re granted by others.” I remember thinking, “I see, that certainly makes sense,” and agreeing with it. I also thought, “While you generally think of heroes as being brave and splendid, the person who’s actually adventuring might not be able to stand expectations like that sometimes.”

Creasion may be a character borne out of those feelings of mine.

Ros, please have tons of sweets and smile tons as well.

Page 31

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Page 32

Sleepiez

When I thought of the name “Sleepiez” in Senyu+, I didn’t think much of it except “There’s an anti-Alba organization”. I also planned for Boss to be a new character. But after I took the time to think about it properly, the Sleepiez in their current form were born.

Thanks to the current Sleepiez being created, F5 was able to start even though I thought before “I’ve already done everything I want to do with Senyu, I can’t make another proper season.”

If there was no Sleepiez, I feel like + would’ve lazily continued, then at some good cut-off point, I feel like I would’ve been told, “Do you think it’s about time to end it?”

A tenth anniversary for example… it would’ve been a good cut-off point… how scary!

Boss

I can’t write about most of the Sleepiez members just yet, so I’ll be talking about Boss as their representative. 

Boss is an alternate universe’s Alba, so despite being Boss, he’s still Alba, and so I want to make him feel like Alba still. But since he’s Boss he can’t retort or make jokes, since it would ruin his dignity. So at the very least, I gave him Alba’s fashion sense to keep his Alba feel. Since his heart stained black and he became evil, his fashion sense naturally became eviller as well, but he’s still Alba, the base is still Alba. He’s wearing clothes that kinda feel like a middle schooler who just discovered fashion for the first time, like he hasn’t managed to go full evil in terms of clothes just yet.

Now I can keep Boss as Boss while still giving him an Alba feel! ...is what I thought, but… does he actually still have that feel…?

Page 33

Alba with Mana 

It made me happy that my wish for my protagonist to become the strongest at the end was granted. I thought up a lot of reasons for why only one of his eyes is red, like how it’s because his awakening is still incomplete, etc., but the number one reason is “it’s cool.” 

A single red eye is cool, right?! It’s cool right?!

Now that he can use his mana to some extent, he controls his overwhelming mana to hold it back, so his eyes are both back to black now.

Page 34

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Page 35

SQ Senyuu.

I had this conversation once-

Y-san from Dwango told me, “I want to take Senyu to a magazine to have it serialized!” 

I thought it would be awesome if it actually happened, so I approved it. Then I was like, “If you do take it to a magazine, where would you take it?”

Then Y-san responded, “Well, if you say ‘magazine’, you think Jump.”

And I was like, “Nah nah, Jump would be impossible, ahahaha.”

I never thought that Y-san would actually bring me an offer for serialization in Jump - Y-san was way too capable. Since my personal experience with Jump all started from there, I’m really grateful!

Pages 36-43

<Season 1 Episode 1 redraw>

Page 44

Afterword

Since I’ve remade Senyu Episode 1 many times before, I thought that I would never remake it again. But then I thought- why don’t I remake Episode 1 at the exact time it was originally released ten years ago, as celebration! So I ended up remaking it again.

But I think it may be my first time remaking it without changing any of the jokes or content.

[idealnreal]

Please overanalyze the shadows in his palace I am begging you.

@appleyjuiceboy​ / jester owns my braincells of course i would do this for u

Okay so i think its best if i go about the order of shadows we meet in the game so. I’m not going to go into the persona/shadows in maruki’s palace. I’ll leave that for some other day. Now! Lets hope i can remain fully coherent.

1) The fluffy haired noodle shadow we meet for (ka)sumi’s awakening

First off, look at the design of this shadow--it has the fluffy hair parted to the right like maruki, its androgynous figure, and that swirly face mask as well! The mask has two eyes, and it even looks like theres a smile there, lopsided. 

We have never seen any other palace shadow taking a similar shape as the palace ruler (except maybe the yaldaboath palace). Shadows are meant to emulate what the ruler thinks of as protectors of their heart. Maruki doesn’t trust anyone other than himself with this secret. And particularly at this phase of his distortion -- there are no scientists, to attendants, no patients. Just an empty, beautiful palace -- with possibly only one type of shadow and protector. The type that represents himself. 

(Also androgynous/nb maruki confirmed ?? yes)

Okay then lets look at what this shadow says to Kasumi.

Shadow: ... Heresy. You dare to spurn our lord’s mercy. Accept yourself... Our lord laments the foolishness birthed from your pain.

Having the context that Kasumi is Sumire here ... Because this scene comes about because Kasumi sees a cognitive version of herself (Sumire) blaming herself -- and so, a part of her is probably trying to remember that she is Sumire. Thus ‘spurn(ing) our lord’s mercy’. And yeah accepting herself as Kasumi instead of trying to remember that she is Sumire. 

But most important is the fact that Maruki’s palace shadows refer to him as a religious or god-like being (’our lord’s mercy’ calling back christian themes). Someone who is merciful and, most of all, does feel grief over one’s pain. Painting an ideal picture of a loving and caring god, ala abrahamic religions. This is a running theme with all the shadow’s dialogs. Let’s put a pin in this for now. 

These design shadows are seen again later in the container room of the palace. They’re slightly faster. The container room is a strange one -- because it doesn’t quite fit in with the rest of the laboratory/hospital/garden of eden thing going on.  While yes labs and hospitals do have storage areas, i cant imagine them being a container warehouse like this. I do headcanon that this is a storage area for the pain and suffering that Maruki has taken on from other people in order to heal them, due to his hyper empathy -- but i’ll analyse the room some other time. For now it’s interesting that the Maruki-like shadows are now relegated to this specific and really dark section of the palace.

Like the throne room/centre of eden that the Maruki boss fight takes place in -- He resigns himself to the darker gloomier parts of his palace. And the same goes for these shadows. This is where he belongs. 

Also abso-fucking-lutely we’re going to talk about how this shadow transforms when it ambushes you:

Skin suit opening up to reveal fangs and rows of teeth, and a formless monster inside. Maruki ... dude ... are you okay? If these shadows are meant to emulate him -- is this how he sees himself sometimes? HHh boy...

2) First lab coat wearing shadow at the start of his palace investigation

Prior to this, while we understood that Maruki was a researcher, it was never a defining feature of him. Like the first thing that came to my mind on Maruki was that he was just the school counsellor and snack purveyor. Now this entire researcher, scientist, side of him is in full display. And this is the most common type of shadow we see, some which are violent, and others are non violent. Maruki sees scientists as the main residents of his palace -- his drive towards investigation and discovery, to puzzling out the intricacies of the human heart, human mind, and human pain. To better further his ability to heal. But there’s also a sort of cold, methodical nature to these scientists. Their ‘healing’ is methodical, based in science.

This coupled with the religious reverence and ideology that their dialog suggests, is a nice contrast. Experiments, data, research, are people’s salvation. Not the simple belief of a deity or of a higher purpose -- but science. Science, in many ways, becomes part and parcel of their religious belief.

Shadow: Those guises ... You aren’t among those who desire salvation. Leave. You are unwanted intruders. Do not disturb our lord’s research-- this world’s salvation. Why do you willingly strive for self-suffering? Why are you reaching out to your own pain?

So here -- the shadow wants them to leave the palace well enough alone. To leave Maruki to his research, and to allow this reality to exist. They don’t want this to end violently and it seems like they’re okay with the trio not ‘desiring salvation’. And when the trio refuse to leave, the shadow asks them why they want to suffer. It’s something inconceivable to them. Maybe even challenging their resolve-- to reconsider their current path, which will only lead to more pain. Also ‘salvation’, ding, on the christian theme counter. Deliverance from above from sin, even redemption. Not for one person, but for the whole world. 

We see this type of shadow again before the scene in the auditorium. 

Shadow: You are misguided. Do not search for pain. Only tragedy awaits you beyond here. [After defeating it] Such a fool, rejecting our lord’s mercy. In that case -- witness it for yourself.

Same themes. Delicious. Lets move on now shall we.

3) Hastur -- the shadow that appears with Maruki at his reveal as his second-in-command / bodyguard

I don’t think i’ve talked about how much i love the lopsided smiles on these masks. Because i love it. it’s just the right amount of unsettling and creepy. fUCk. And the twitching, twisting, and the weeping blue paint that Hastur’s shadow form does before transforming is /chefs kiss. I wanted more.

Anyway, onto Hastur’s design. Not a labcoat this time, just an ordinary looking white suit with no tie. This is the only time we see Maruki have a bodyguard shadow -- something else he relies on. Hastur’s presence in this scene only shows how deeply afraid and uncomfortable Maruki actually is with intruders in his palace. This experience is a reminder that someone had come into Rumi’s parents house to kill him years ago (a theory for another time). Like that incident years ago, he doesn’t resort to violence here -- he did and does try to negotiate. But when that didn’t work, at least now he has something that can fight for him. 

( It is only in the second infiltration when we see Maruki actually take a more active role -- but I won’t get to that here. )

Hastur: Stubborn imbeciles, rejecting our lord ...

There is a running theme here, unfortunately. The shadows again cannot comprehend why anyone would choose to reject Maruki’s salvation, why anyone would choose suffering. And words like ‘foolish’ ‘misguided’ and finally ‘imbeciles’ here are all used to describe those who choose to reject it. While i do think Maruki only bends reality if the person wishes it (subconsciously or consciously), and does accept that there are people who won’t accept their wishes being granted and is aware of the reasons why-- He cannot fully understand or emphatise with it. 

4) These deformed Maruki-like shadows guarding the control room

Jesus christ above, i don’t like these, because they contrast with all other designs as these are more brutish and deformed. There’s used as gatekeepers at certain points of the palace, in the first control room, and later on in the brain-pod-room (my brain cells are stopping to work now excuse me) before the garden puzzle portion, at his final will seed and the entrance to the garden of eden.

We know Maruki isn’t a brute strength kinda person. And yet we see these few who’s only purpose is to defend certain things and areas with force. Its uncharacteristic, but at the same time, given the things that these shadows are defending -- it makes sense. No cunning, no wit, no negotiation, no compassion -- just forcefully defending very important parts of his heart and his work. 

Shadow (at the control room): So you dare defy His Excellency. You shall not interfere with our master’s work!

Shadow (brainwash room): Foolish rebels! You won’t take one step past here!

Shadow (entrance to garden of eden) : You?! I can’t believe you’ve made it so far ...

I had to do a double take on this. I think this is the only time this title ‘His Excellency’ has been used in the palace. While it is used for catholic bishops and that sort -- its mostly used in the context of heads of state, ambassadors-- more secular roles. The other times this shadow speaks is also similarly less reverent, less religious orientated. Of course this makes sense if the only function of these shadows is to use force to defend. They’re not the scientists or the first maruki-imitation shadows -- they’re not as devoted, and they dont have to be. 

5) Finally, these limbless noodles

This one is found during the horticulture portion of the palace. I can’t exactly figure out why. And as far as i can tell, they only appear in this portion of the palace.

As far as the design goes -- these are probably the most unhuman like. Slender, androgynous with only a mask. I’ve got nothing. Braincells ran out. Sorry!

(Haha androgynous maruki go brr)

SO! That’s it. thanks for coming to my ted talk and following me down this rabbit hole. I need to go and drink some fuckin tea. 

[emsxworld]

NEW CHAPTER!! 😊

Two scenes in this chapter were inspired by art created by @negativesd09 and @emkayoh, I have linked their work in the end notes. 

....

Ever since Peter Anthony Stark was born, he had become the definition of a Daddy’s boy, plain and simple. Perhaps it was because he shared two of his names with his father, or perhaps it was because his father had been there to take care of him and love him when his mother could not – whatever it was, one thing was for certain, Peter Stark absolutely adored him.

He was always smiling and giggling in delight when his Daddy was in the room. His first word had been ‘Dada’ and his first steps had been to toddle towards his astonished father when the mansion’s A.I notified the billionaire of the new progression occurring in the child’s nursery.

There was nothing Tony Stark could do wrong in Peter’s eyes. At times, he was the only one who saw through the protective layers the genius had built over the years to see the loveable; (for lack of a better word) dorky side to the apparent well put together billionaire and business tycoon.

Tony Stark wasn’t like his father. From the first time he held his new born son in his arms and gazed down in awe at the perfect little face with the tiny upturned nose, fingernails the size of a grain of rice and two beautiful dark chocolate brown eyes (an identical pigment to his own irises), he knew that he would not be Howard. He would not let his child feel neglected, worthless and the symbolism of disappointment as he had been growing up in the spotlight.

The love he had for Peter was indescribable, but those closest to him could see the irreparable bond Tony shared with his child. They were inseparable and so alike, not just in looks, but in their shared curiosity and urge to learn more, to thrive on in their own creative roots. Neither Pepper, Rhodey or Happy would ever deny that Tony was an excellent father. He had changed since Peter had arrived. The drinking and all-nighters were a relic of the past.

Now, Peter was the centre of the billionaire’s world. It hadn’t been easy at first, but the little boy who shared his eyes and his high IQ had wormed his way into the billionaire’s closed heart and Tony knew deep down that he could not live without Peter. One of the best parts about being a father was seeing the pure admiration and adoration in his child’s eyes and it was very clear even from the early days when the young Stark couldn’t even form words, that Peter felt exactly the same.

There was only one problem with this mutual strong connection the father and son shared. Peter had separation anxiety. He was incredibly susceptive to physical affection, which was all his father’s fault because the man couldn’t resist kissing those cute chubby cheeks and mop of curls on a daily basis whenever he cuddled his kid in his arms.

At the age of four, Peter hadn’t changed apart from growing a little taller and expanding his knowledge with the genius mind he had inherited from his father. He was still as adorable as ever and Tony just couldn’t resist the inevitable urge to swing his little one into the air, heart swelling with love as the boy squealed and giggled in infectious delight at the playful action, before bringing him down and planting small kisses all over his little face like there was no tomorrow. This type of hyper scene occurred on a daily basis and it was no wonder that Peter often craved this indulgent affection as he had been raised to expect it.  

Tony had been brought in a cold household with a detached and distant father. The only affection he received was from his mother and JARVIS, therefore as far as he was concerned he was entitled to ensure his own son knew that he was loved and cherished. Tony had very rarely experienced the tender, intimate moments he shared with his child when he was Peter’s age. He read to Peter, played with him, made him his breakfast, lunch and dinner and did everything with his son that Howard had missed out on.

As aforementioned, the only problem with his parenting style was that Peter couldn’t stand to be parted from him. Tony always dreaded the inevitable business meetings where he was required to be out of Malibu a couple nights at a time, because he knew his kid would be unhappy and there was nothing he could do to sway him.

His son loved Pepper, his Uncle Rhodey and Uncle Happy, but they weren’t his Daddy and no-body would ever be able to live up to the standards that his father had set. Tony never admitted it out loud, but the truth was that he hated being separated from his son too, even if it was easily perceived by Pepper when she witnessed first-hand how jittery and reserved the genius became when he couldn’t be with Peter.

It just so happened that another business meeting was just around the corner yet again. Both he and Pepper were meant to be there, and Rhodes was busy with his duties for the army, so that just left Happy to watch Peter whilst Tony was away for his eleven o’clock slot.

Happy was fond of Peter, but he wasn’t naturally attuned to children’s wants and needs and he often grumbled under his breath when he thought the others couldn’t hear when the little boy would cry or would enter his ‘bratty’ phase. It was very rare for Peter to do this, but it happened, as it did with all four-year olds from time to time.

Tony was keen to keep his boy distracted and entertained for the morning before he would have to leave. He had told Peter about the meeting when he went to wake him up early that morning with a gentle, warm hand stroking his son’s back to rouse him from his slumber and a soft kiss to his curls. The boy was too lethargic to properly take the meaning behind his father’s words in and had mumbled some incoherent words at the mention of the business meeting, before rolling onto his back and snuggling into the man’s sturdy chest, nuzzling his face into the crook of his Daddy’s neck.

Tony huffed a laugh at the gesture, well used to Peter being pretty unresponsive and even more clingy when he first woke up and the billionaire was only too obliged to hold his kiddo close and carry him to the kitchen to make some blueberry pancakes together and forget their worries. Heading down to the lab was the next point on the agenda.

The workshop underneath the main floor of the mansion was their favourite place. It had always been Tony’s main area of expertise, of course, as it allowed him to indulge in his genius ideas and creations and it was where he felt most at home.

As Peter was his little shadow, naturally that meant that the father had had to make a few changes to the lab to ensure it was safe for a baby to be in. The soft foamed area specifically designed for Peter, created by Tony, had been installed soon after his kid begun to display a certain neediness to be with his Daddy nearly twenty-four seven.

Peter didn’t spend all his time in his highly efficient playpen though. That was only reserved for times when his father was working on something dangerous like tasering some loose wires or working with small intricate designs which required tiny bolts and gadgets that were liable for little feet to accidentally tread on. Peter spent many a time in his father’s arms when the man wasn’t working with his hands, sitting in his Daddy’s lap and basking in the warmth and comfort that only a parent could provide.

When his son was a baby, Tony would often sit cross-legged on the floor, cradling the little one in his arms and browsing through online articles and profiles about particular topics and public figures. Peter loved the blue glow that came from the screens that seemed to float in mid-air…

…

…“Da!” The baby chirped, waving one small chubby arm at a photo of an old car model from the 1960s which the billionaire was interested in buying.

“Mhm,” Tony hummed, lifting his son so he was standing on the man’s legs to see the picture better. “What do you think, Pete? A worthy investment?” He asked, resting his chin on the top of the boy’s fuzzy chestnut curls.

Peter didn’t answer with any coherent words, but he babbled enthusiastically whilst waving his little fist, drool trailing down his chin.

The father deciphered that the only reason why his kid was drawn to this 1967 Shelby Cobra model was because it was blue. It was the colour of Peter’s nursery walls, even though this was a royal blue instead of the sky shade his room boasted, but it was smart lick of paint, Tony would give it that.

“A fitting endorsement if I ever saw one,” the billionaire remarked, tilting his chin to place a quick kiss to the top of the boy’s head, before leaning round the small body to wipe away the trail of drool with the sleeve of his long-sleeved Metallica top. The baby squirmed and wriggled but didn’t whimper as he was used to the man fretting over him. “You’re a little dork, you know?” He teased.

Peter’s little face broke into a big slobbery grin at his father’s playful tone and the tickly feeling of the beard which was scratching against the side of his face as the man leaned close to him.

He burst into a fit of giggles, Tony’s favourite sound in the world, which spurred him to grin and snigger at how perfect his little boy really was, nuzzling his face against Peter’s and scattering loads of small kisses all over his baby’s face.

“Yeah, you’re a crazy monkey, aren’t you? Crazy baby,” Tony joked between kisses, heart swelling with warmth when his kid squealed with laughter and wriggled even more.

Peter babbled some other incoherent words, but his delighted laughter was enough. Tony chuckled, warmly, rubbing his face against the little tuft of hair and closing his eyes as he inhaled the sweet smell of the apple scented shampoo he had applied the night before and something that was distinctly Peter.

“Love you, baby,” the father murmured after a few moments once the boy’s infectious giggles had reduced and the gummy smile was all that remained. Peter snuffled and cooed, nuzzling into the man’s warmth and the two remained down in the lab for the rest of the day.

Pepper found them a few hours later in a rather unresponsive state. Tony was splayed out in the playpen, top discarded beside him and Peter was lying on his bare chest.

Both were sleeping soundly, cute little snuffles escaping the baby as he nuzzled into the spot right above his father’s heart and the man’s hand was resting protectively on the child’s back, jaw slackened in his relaxed state but the steady grip on his son never faltering.

Pepper downright cooed at the sight and immediately asked JARVIS to take a photo and a video; smirking when he replied with an almost response that could almost be described as fond (even though it was technically an AI): “I already have, Miss Potts.”

…

Tony loved that picture. He had plenty of photos in a file named ‘Peter Anthony Stark’, where JARVIS had been like his own personal cameraman; always being there to capture the moments, but that photo definitely had to be in the billionaire’s top five that they had collected over the past four years.

Lab time was still special, especially as Peter was big enough now to sit at his own desk and work on drawings or small DIY projects, whilst the genius tinkered a few feet away. It was the perfect way to keep his kid occupied for the morning until Happy arrived.

After devouring the blueberry pancakes, Tony scooped Peter up into his arms, licking his finger and wiping away the syrup which had spilled down the boy’s chin.

“Okay, I know you love your old man’s cooking like a champ, but you wanna try actually getting it in your mouth next time, buddy?” Tony teased, light-heartedly, tickling underneath his kid’s chin, eliciting approving giggles from the little boy as he squirmed uncontrollably in his father’s hold. “You crazy demon child,” the man remarked, indulgently, bouncing the boy on his hip and tickling across his little tummy as he wandered over to the staircase leading down to the lab.  

“Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!” Peter chirped, grinning from ear to ear and practically squealing when he realised where his father was leading them.

“Peter, Peter, Peter!” Tony replied on an instant, chuckling at the bright shine in his son’s doe eyes.

“Daddy, I wanna, I wanna dress up as you! I wanna be you!” He was vibrating with excitement, bouncing a couple of times as he was barely able to contain his enthusiasm.

“Really? You wanna look like Daddy today?” Tony commented in mirth, smirking at his kid as he typed the pass code into the security panel. Peter was currently in his space themed pyjama top and bottoms, but he had his trainers on just in case there were sharp objects on the floor.

“Mhm! Wanna be like you!” Peter expressed, enthusiastically with a serene nod, as if it was the most ordinary, everyday request. It definitely was for the son of Iron Man.

“Alright, kiddo. We’ll muck about down here for a bit and then we’ll get you in your armour,” Tony joked, thinking about the Iron Man styled onesie hanging up in the boy’s wardrobe.

They didn’t do anything too complicated as it was still early, and Peter was still tired, even though one wouldn’t know it by looking at the ecstatic ball of energy, but Tony knew that it wouldn’t be long until he crashed with the way his crazy kid was going on. The genius asked JARVIS to play some soft pop music for background noise and he let Peter sit in his lap as he sat in front of the monitors and messed about on the internet and make notes on his upcoming projects for an hour or two.

It was getting closer to eleven and Tony’s heart sunk as he realised he would have to leave Peter soon, which was made even worse because of how perfect the morning had been up until this point. He wanted to make things as smooth as possible by keeping his son entertained, but it almost seemed to have backfired back onto the man since he would have to ruin the relaxed, peaceful mood he had created.

Tony sighed, deeply, ruffling his son’s curls in the process from where his chin was resting on top of his head. He clicked off the document he had been working on and tilted his head to gaze down at his son, who was fiddling with an Iron Man action figure and one in the shape of an alien, making cute little “pow!” and “bang!” sounds as he made them fight each other.

The man brought his lips down and blew a small raspberry on the spot behind the boy’s ear, provoking him to snort and burst into peals of laughter, leaning against his father’s chest.

“Daddy silly!” He giggled.

Tony chuckled, warmly, hugging his kid close as he nuzzled his hair affectionately. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah!”

He watched on fondly as Peter played with his fingers where his hand was resting on the boy’s tummy. His hand looked so big on his child’s small body and the innocent curiosity displayed by someone so young was incredibly endearing to the elder.

“You wanna get dressed, buddy?” Tony murmured into his son’s curls after a couple moments of just watching his kid observe his hands like he was seeing them for the first time. It was adorable and Stark never thought that he would describe something like that in his entire life. Stark men didn’t create adorable things; somehow Peter existed.

“I be like you now?” The boy asked, peering up at him with an excited grin on his face, adoration for his father shining in his brown eyes and Tony couldn’t help but feel blessed.

He smiled, indulgently, bending to drop a kiss to his son’s fore-head. “Anytime you want, kiddo,” he chuckled, swinging the boy into the air playfully and blowing another raspberry on his little pudgy belly as the pyjama top rose up from the sudden move and Peter squealed in delight, kicking his legs in his exhilaration.

Before he had his baby, Tony hadn’t been one for physical affection or physical contact at all for that matter. He never liked people handing him things and it was always Happy, Pepper or Rhodes who dealt with the personal one to one contact with investors and journalists. He had become so accustomed to behaving this way that upon the discovery that he had fathered a child, his first reaction was fear. He rarely opened up to anybody and the idea that he suddenly had a tiny human being to care for and raise terrified him.

The incredible thing was that Peter made it easy. He had literally fallen in love. Pepper liked to joke that her boss had become smitten with his kid ever since he first laid eyes on him and Tony didn’t even have the heart to argue. All of it belonged to Peter and he wouldn’t know it yet, but in a few years, Pepper would enter his heart too and he would finally open up fully to someone other than his son.

Until then, Peter would be the sole receiver of Tony’s physical affections. That’s what made the whole leaving predicament so much harder, because Peter relied on him for so much and only Tony knew all the little details about what his son liked and disliked, what he was afraid of, what brought him the greatest joys in life…he could go on and on. Even though it physically pained the genius to hear his child crying for him, he knew that Peter couldn’t live like this forever and they would have to get used to living their own lives as the boy grew older.

Tony carried the little one to his bedroom, heart sinking and stomach churning with dread as he placed the boy on his feet beside his bed and headed over to the wardrobe to grab the Iron Man onesie. He wasn’t ready for the next conversation he had to have with the gleeful little boy currently bouncing on the balls of his feet at the prospect of dressing up like his Daddy and blissfully believing that they were going to be spending the whole day together, but deep down the billionaire knew that it had to be done.

When he turned back around, he couldn’t help the warm smile that graced his features as his amusement caused the laugh lines around his dark eyes to crease and his lips to perk upwards, because Peter had taken the initiative to remove all of his clothes himself.

“You’re a terrific helper, buddy,” Tony chuckled, kneeling down to be at his son’s height so he could ask him to raise one leg to slip the onesie over his body, but he stopped to pull the boy’s underwear back up again. “Sorry, Pete, gotta keep yourself tucked away during the day,” he sniggered.

“Nuh uh! ‘m gonna be naked!” Peter giggled.

“Not gonna happen, pal. We want you to look your best for when Uncle Happy comes, right?” Tony said, pulling the onesie up over his kid’s shoulders and zipping it up. The comment left a bitter, sour taste in his mouth as it cemented the fact that he would be leaving his son in little more than half an hour.

“We goin’ out with Uncie Happy?” Lordy, this was going to be fun…

Tony smoothed the wrinkled fabric down and gently gripped the boy’s arms. “No, bud, you remember what I told you this morning when I woke you up? Your Uncle Happy is coming to spend some time with his favourite nephew whilst Daddy goes for his meeting,” he spoke softly and reassuringly, although it didn’t do him any favours because the moment his words left his lips, the boy’s face immediately scrunched up and his bottom lip trembled.

“No,” Peter whimpered. “Daddy stay with Peter.”

Jesus, the poor kid only now seemed to notice that the man was dressed smartly in one of his expensive suits.

Tony’s heart broke at his kid’s trembling voice and his little plea, as tears formed in his eyes. The father reached up with one hand to cup his child’s soft cheek and catch a fallen tear on his thumb as it fell.

“I’m sorry, baby, I wish I could. You know that I would stay and play with you all day if I didn’t have important work to see to,” the man explained.

“But Auntie Pep can do your work and you stay here?” Peter said, toying on his bottom lip with his pointer finger as his big doe eyes begged the man to stay with him. God, this kid was so damn smart, but he was so damn innocent still.

Despite the gloominess of the situation, Tony couldn’t help but chuckle at his kid’s optimism. “It’s not that simple, honey. Pepper isn’t the head of the company, so there are some things that she can’t do, but guess who can?”

“You,” the little boy mumbled, reaching up to rub at his nose as he sniffled.

The billionaire smiled, sadly, rubbing his hands up and down his son’s arms in what he hoped would be a comforting gesture. “Exactly, buddy, good job. If I don’t show up, then I would get a big telling off and you wouldn’t want that to happen to Daddy, right?”

“No…”

Tony couldn’t stand the completely dejected look on his kid’s usually beaming face; it felt like his insides were being ripped apart. “C’mon, Petey, lemme see that billion-dollar smile,” he coaxed, tickling the boy’s ribs and under his arm pits, two sensitive areas which never failed to get the little one giggling hysterically.

Peter only fidgeted a bit at the move, a stubborn pout protruding on his lips and he crossed his arms to effectively stop his father’s tickling and the elder had no choice but to take his hands away and raise an eyebrow at his kid’s attitude.

“If you can’t stay with me, then Daddy take Peter with!” The boy suddenly announced, tone completely deadpan and leaving no room for argument.

It was quite the statement from a four year-old child, but it amused the father because his kid sounded so much like him. He was just as stubborn and enthusiastic once he got an idea in his head and Peter clearly thought that he had just come up with a brilliant idea, judging by the satisfied glint in his eye, refusing to back down.

“I don’t know about that, buddy.” He couldn’t stop the huge smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, hands gently resting on his son’s hips as he spoke. “A lot of business people don’t like kids, they’re nasty old men who don’t care about anyone, especially little boys like you. You wouldn’t want to sit in a boring room with dudes like that, would you?”

Peter shook his head, his determination not once wavering even if the idea of scary old people scrutinising him did give the child some sense of anxiety. He didn’t care, he only wanted to be with his Daddy.

“I be with Daddy, bad guys don’ matter,” he stated. His fierce attempt at a serious expression was adorable, if not slightly worrying to the concerned father.

Tony caught his bottom lip between his teeth, eyebrows narrowing as he studied his kid for a moment in pure disbelief. He wasn’t usually left speechless by anybody and always managed to have the last word, but he was pretty much flawed. His four year-old had stunned him, but he supposed it wasn’t the first time Peter had done this, the little bugger had made him incredibly soft and Tony knew it.

He sighed through his nose, leaning forward to scoop the boy up into his arms, staring into his child’s eyes in admiration at his valiant efforts. He supported his son’s lower half with one arm as he playfully bopped his kid’s nose with the other hand, causing it to scrunch up as Peter giggled at the gesture.

“You’re incredible, Pete. Four years old and you’re already leaving your Dad lost for words, what is the world coming to, huh?” Tony spoke, jovially, shaking his head in wonder.

“Love Daddy!” Peter chirped, sweetly.

A soft look crossed the billionaire’s face, paternal love for his child glimmering in his chocolate brown eyes and he leaned forward to rub his nose against the boy’s, giving him an Eskimo kiss. Peter loved these kisses the most and he was in a fit of giggles immediately, squealing with delight at his father’s affections.

“Sir, Mr Hogan has arrived,” JARVIS suddenly announced. Perfect timing.

“Thanks, J,” Tony murmured, pressing a kiss to his son’s fore-head and making his way out of the boy’s room and down to the foyer. He braced the back of his kid’s head, allowing him to cuddle close since it was the least he could do, because he knew that he was in for one hell of a goodbye in a few moments.

Happy was just walking through the front door when father and son arrived, tucking the car keys into his pocket.

“Hey, Hap. Good drive?”

“As good as it can be. How’s the kid?” The driver asked, gaze drifting to the boy in his best friend’s arms. The sight certainly wasn’t anything new for him, especially when his boss had a business meeting.

“Sulking,” Tony smirked, bouncing his kid gently on his hip, who refused to move his face from the crook of the man’s neck.

“He been good his morning?”

“As good as he can be,” Tony retorted with a cheeky wink and a mischievous smirk. “Nah, he’s been great. He’s just a little cutie-pie, aren’t you, pal?” He spoke with a high lift in his voice, bouncing his kid and tickling across the boy’s rib cage, eliciting some high pitched squeals and bombastic laughter as Peter finally removed his face from the man’s neck.

“There he is, there’s my handsome little guy,” Tony beamed, pleased that his son was now smiling brightly. Speaking too soon… “Hey, Pete, Uncle Happy’s here, you wanna say hi?”

“Hey, buddy,” Happy greeted, walking up to the two with a kind smile.

“Hi, Uncie Happy!” Peter waved and reached over to give the driver a hug, Tony taking the opportunity to transfer the boy into the other man’s arms. Happy squeezed the child warmly and caught his friend’s eye, who smiled sadly and reached over to gently stroke his son’s hair.

Tony leaned in to press a quick kiss to the top of his kid’s head, murmuring in his ear, “See you soon, kiddo. Love you.”

He should have just left as soon as he placed Peter in Happy’s arms, because what followed was definitely all on him. He hated leaving his kid just as much as Peter detested it and it probably would have been better if he had just snuck out, so he didn’t have to put them both through the heavy emotions that came with their separation.

The moment the low goodbye left his lips, Peter suddenly burst into tears. His chest heaved dangerously with his heavy sobs and hitching breaths, both arms reaching out for Tony desperately.

“N-no, D-Dada, don’t go!” Peter howled, cries only increasing as he made grabby hands at his Daddy, whose pained expression caused Happy to make the quick decision to transfer the hysterical child back into his father’s arms. His wailing still persisted even when he was as close as he could be to the man.

“Sh, sh, shh, come on, baby, it’s alright. Shhh, it’s okay, I’m right here, Daddy’s here, sweetheart, shh…” Tony hushed, quietly, subconsciously rocking his son and nuzzling his fluffy curls, affectionately, placing delicate kisses across flushed cheeks and temples. The poor kid was bawling, his face bathed in tears and his grip on his father’s suit jacket exceedingly tight for one so small.

Happy watched on worriedly, eyebrows raised in concern at the boy’s complete meltdown. Tony usually managed to leave before things got this ugly, as Happy, Pepper or Rhodes were able to distract the kid with his Legos or some kind of game, so he wouldn’t bring out the waterworks like this. It wasn’t often that Tony got dragged away to these damn business meetings, so he supposed that it was just too much for the kid this time, as it had been a while since the man had been called away and it explained the extreme outburst from Peter.

The kid eventually managed to calm himself, but it took several minutes of Tony cradling him, rocking him and murmuring sweet nothings into the boy’s hair for Peter’s heart-wrenching sobs to reduce in their volume. He was still crying softly into his Daddy’s shoulder, begging for him to stay.

“Alright, screw this,” Tony spoke after a few more minutes, voice hoarse and rough as he stroked the back of his son’s head whilst continuing to bounce him with his other hand. “I’m taking him with and you’re driving.”

“Wait, you’re what?!” Happy exclaimed.

“There’s no fu-freaking way I’m leaving him here. C’mon, buddy, let’s get your toy,” Tony said, leaving no room for argument, as he hefted the boy higher on his hip and headed back towards Peter’s bedroom. Happy was left standing in the hallway, completely flabbergasted.

The billionaire didn’t relinquish his hold on his son as he allowed the boy to reach for his Iron Man figure, but before he could dash back to Happy, Peter’s squeals of protest stopped him.

“What is it, Pete? We’re gonna be late.”

“Want my crayons, Daddy!”

Tony sighed, grabbing the colourful box that was sat on Peter’s dresser and a little notebook, stuffing them in the inside pocket of his suit jacket, before making his way back to the foyer. He didn’t care that he shouldn’t be giving in to his kid’s desires like this; he couldn’t stand listening to those horrible cries and begging anymore, and he figured it would just be easier for everybody if he brought Peter with. He could worry about what the board members would think later.

“Right, let’s go,” Tony ordered, slightly breathless from all the running around, but he was pleased when the driver simply shrugged and followed him to the car. He could always count on Happy to just trust his judgement and go along with whatever he came up with, even if it was ridiculous.

Tony climbed into the back seat, sitting Peter in his lap and pulling the seatbelt over the both of them. He was exhausted, emotionally and physically and he didn’t have the heart to force the kid into his own seat, not after the huge meltdown he had just witnessed. Happy immediately pressed the button to slide the privacy screen up the moment father and son got themselves settled.

Peter appeared pretty content with their seating arrangements, sitting sideways on his father’s lap with his legs stretched out across the next seat and a small smile on his face as he nuzzled it into the man’s sturdy chest. Tony was aware that it wasn’t the safest position for the boy to be in, but he trusted Happy to get them safely to this damn meeting and there was no way the genius was letting his kid leave his arms now after their eventful morning. He felt like he was going to get whiplash soon with all this hot and cold, but he supposed this was what it was like having a little human that took after him.

Tony was drawn out of his thoughts when he felt Peter rummaging inside his suit jacket, fishing out two crayons, one bright red and the other yellow. His other hand was still accommodated with clutching onto his Iron Man figure, which he held close to his chest as if it were the most precious thing in the world.

“What’re you up to, buddy?” Tony asked, fondly, gaze soft as he watched the boy.

“Dwawing,” Peter said and before the man had a chance to decipher what on earth his son was saying, his kid reached up and drew a big red line down his father’s cheek.

Tony should have pulled away, any normal person would if they were expected to look their best at an important business meeting in less than ten minutes. No. The only movement he made was to smile, affectionately, allowing Peter to colour all over his face. God knows what he was mapping out, but Tony simply gave him the freedom to do it.

“We match now, Daddy,” Peter giggled after a few more minutes, giving a little bounce of excitement in his father’s lap as he beamed proudly.

Tony raised an eyebrow at this and took his phone out of his pocket to get the camera up and observe his reflection. Peter had attempted to draw a replica of the Iron Man mask with about as much accuracy and detail a four year-old could muster. It was pretty hilarious considering the fact that if Peter really wanted him to take on his alter ego image, he could have just pressed a button on his StarkWatch and the armour would be there in less than five seconds.

The genius scoffed at his very narcissistic image, but there was no possibility that he was going to spoil his kid’s enjoyment, so he simply cuddled him close and kissed his little nose. “Good boy, you did a great job,” he murmured, resting his fore-head against his son’s and smiling when Peter hummed happily at the praise.

Despite Happy’s excellent driving, they still turned up at the offices about fifteen minutes late into the two hour meeting and Tony gave a little sigh as they pulled up around the back. He secured his hold on his son and climbed out the car, giving his friend an appreciative pat on the shoulder, before dashing into the reception area.

The female receptionist gave him a strange, yet slightly bemused look, but he wasn’t surprised considering the current state of the normally well presented Tony Stark and his young son who was usually kept out of the public eye. A small smile quirked at the corner of her lips as her gaze trailed over the drawing on his face, but she politely chose not to comment on it and sign them in.

Tony took the lift to the top floor, tapping his foot impatiently as he watched the number dial slowly increase.

“Daddy?”

“Hm?”

“Will you still be in twouble?” Peter asked, blinking up at him with wide curious, innocent eyes. “Late?”

“Naahh, I’ve got my armour on. Nothing can get through that, you’re keeping me safe, kiddo,” Tony chuckled, brushing some hair back from his son’s fore-head, who grinned at the comment.

As soon as the doors binged open, the billionaire was off like a shot towards the correct room, not even pausing to knock and instead opting to head straight in. The door banged against the wall as it was slammed open and every head in the room whipped towards the source of the sudden loud noise, many jumping upright in their seats.

“Sorry I’m late. Peter was a nightmare this morning,” Tony said, walking over to the nearest free seat, which happened to be right next to Rhodes.

Everyone was too stunned to speak at the baffling sight of their boss with crayon all over his face and his child dressed in what appeared to be Iron Man pyjamas, clutching an Iron Man figure in his hand as he played with it quietly and ignored the onlookers.

Tony collapsed in the chair, sitting Peter on the table so that he was facing him, and he could give his arms a rest. He didn’t even need to look in his best friend’s direction to know that he was currently on the receiving end of one hell of a perplexed stare.

“Don’t even ask,” was all the exhausted genius could muster, only glancing at him in the corner of his eye.

“Tony…” Pepper, who was standing at the front and had been leading the presentation, sighed vehemently, bracing the side of her face with her hand in despair.

It would be many years later when those closest to Peter would look back on that bizarre turn of events fondly and they would always view the day that Tony Stark decided to take his clingy son to a business meeting as one of the best examples of the billionaire being a great parent. Tony liked to secretly agree.

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starburst matchup 

exchange with @haikyuu-matches​

hello! thanks for doing this with me, i think it's such a cute idea! i hope you don't mind that i've went with a more narrative approach with this matchup, i have never done one in my life D: 

you have been matched with komori motoya! 

falling for you!

komori met you at a community volleyball club. he doesn't visit too often, with the responsibilities of his own high school club, but he likes to play when he can. one particular day, he entered the community centre and saw you in all your 5'6 glory. the last time he came, he didn't see you in the crowd of familiar neighbourhood faces. you stood further towards the back of the hall, fidgeting with your fingers. this image looked all too familiar to komori, the cousin of a particularly standoffish ace. a sympathetic pang in his chest and he walked over to you, smiling as your eyes met his. 

you both traded names and he noticed that you were a little quiet. that was okay, he could talk around that. and he did, asking you questions and trying his hardest to make you feel comfortable. taking glances at your face, he saw the corners of your mouth turn upwards and noted that it was working. 

was it weird that he was enjoying it? 

komori doesn't remember too many things about that day. the volleyball match was fun and he remembered doing a really good receive. the rest of his memories from that day were filled with you. you and your shy smile, you and your dark chocolate eyes, you and your cute jokes. sure, you could've been the same as every other girl he's met in his life but there was something so discernibly about you. something so outstanding that he felt couldn't be matched. he couldn't put his finger on it so he made it his mission to finally put a name to this feeling. 

he found that the second he mentally declared his manhunt to define his thoughts on you, he was seeing you everywhere. he spotted you at the convenience store, he bumped into you at the dog park and he saw you at school. he saw you at school? komori was mildly surprised to see you in the cafeteria of his school, which was your's too. you weren't all too shocked, you knew about him through volleyball monthly but you didn't want to tell him that you did. 

five minutes of conversation and he discovered that you were both in different classes. no wonder why he never saw you around. or perhaps he did but he never took notice of your sleek black hair. he was always accompanying sakusa anyway so he didn't really notice anyone outside of his club or his class. 

somehow, someone mentioned the upcoming exam season. you declared your conflict with standardised testing, he proclaimed his struggle with revising content in return. it became very obvious to komori that his chance to understand you more intently was here; he could ask you to study with him! talk about killing two birds with one stone. you agreed to his plan with a gentle smile and he felt his heart flutter. was it the satisfaction of your agreement or was it something deeper? 

he decided that the answer would come to him later, not now. 

after the much anticipated study session came another one, and another one, and then studying morphed into free time. and then free time morphed into a weekly friday night hangout. unbeknownst to him, one of the beloved friday nights would become a vehicle for his romantic epiphany.  

komori enjoyed this turn of events. as much as he wouldn't admit it out loud, komori realised that he enjoyed your presence too. maybe a little too much. every second he spent with you, he felt his heart racing faster than it ever did after a volleyball match. it didn't help that your accidental touches made it accelerate even more. he didn't think that was even possible. it was impossible to not drink in the sight of you. the glow of your face, your silky dark hair, your gleaming brown eyes. perhaps you might’ve found them boring and painfully average but he thought you were the prettiest person he’d ever had the pleasure of perceiving. 

his fixation on you extended past your outward appearance and dove right within your mind, your heart, your very soul. he loved the sound of your laugh, the noise was melodious to him. he loved your sense of humour, all of those puns and dad jokes were right up his alley. hearing them made his heart flutter even more. he loved your hardworking nature, your love for the rain, the passion you put into everything you adored. 

he loved you. 

komori saw your widening eyes in his vision and suddenly he was brought back to the cold of your living room, back to the dark of the midnight sky, back to where he was sitting right now; next to you on the timber floorboards. the neon light of the television reflected on your pretty face, the movie playing on the screen long forgotten in favour of you. 

the realisation that he said that out loud hit him right in the chest and he felt like he was going to pass out. komori felt the air enter his lungs again when he heard you reciprocate loud and clear. 

you loved him too. 

the relationship dynamic!

you're both the most entertaining pair to be around, the gemini/leo combo makes for a fun relationship. 

the two of you are one of those couples that people want to be around, wishing to stick around to laugh with you and just see you so in love. 

with your mom friend energy and his dad friend energy (which i know he just has), you both become the designated parents amongst your friends. whether its a blessing or a curse, that's up to them to decide. 

the two of you are constantly on the same wavelength. 

it’s never too loud or too quiet with komori, just the right balance of both. 

he loves your sense of humour and thinks you’re one of the funniest people on the planet. it helps that he’s absolutely enamoured by your puns and dad jokes. sometimes he’ll shoot one right back at you just to hear you laugh. 

you both like poking a little fun at each other, giving teasing remarks or sarcastic quips. 

komori cares so much about you. 

he understands your need to recover in social situations and gives you the time that you need. he’s willing to be the pillar you run to whenever your social battery’s running low. 

though he admires your hardworking nature, he won’t hesitate to stop you if you overwork yourself. he always encourages breaks and offers to do your work for you if that’s what you need. not necessarily a nagging type of person but if he needs to take physical action, he’ll do it. it’s mostly just him stealing your laptop and pulling you into his lap for a cuddle. 

he doesn’t hesitate to remind you that you don’t have to be a people pleaser. an understanding man, he knows that it’s hard to just get over it so he tells you that he’ll be with you every step of the way, always giving you a gentle reminder of how cool you are to him and that you can say no. 

komori wants to be the shoulder you lean on whenever you’re facing something you don’t like. loud noises? he’ll hold you close and rub your back, telling you that it’ll all be okay. confrontation? he’ll confront them for you. injuries? he’ll keep an eye on you to make sure that you’re never going to be hurt. on the off chance that you do earn a wound, komori will ensure that you’re fixed up as soon as possible. he has a whole mini first aid kit on him specifically for this reason. fear of losing? he’ll always remind you that your efforts mattered more than the results and give you a kiss on the top of your head. the unknown? he’ll waddle through the unknown with you. he’s scared of it too but he won’t tell you that. violence? he’ll cover your eyes and guide you away with strong, gentle arms. 

he loves indulging himself in all of your interests.  

on lazy days, he’ll sit with you and take turns reading a book to each other out loud. sometimes it’s a whole novel, sometimes it’s a manga you’ve picked up from the library. he thinks it’s cute seeing your eyebrows furrow while you concentrate on the words in front of you. 

the study dates don’t end. whenever one of you is struggling with a subject, the other visits to be their personal tutor. it ends up being you a lot of the time, since komori loves your studying method. 

komori loves to read your writing. there are days where you go over to his to hangout and sit in silence. he adores that he can be that relaxed around you and lounge around on his phone while you sit up with your laptop propped on your lap. you’re always writing up a draft of a new creative piece whenever he glances at your laptop. he graciously offers to be your beta reader and indulges in every word you’ve typed. komori thinks that your writing style is so beautiful. 

one day, you told him that you like the french language and he spent a week trying to learn how to say ‘i love you’ and maybe a couple of other phrases to surprise you out of nowhere. when he saw your shock, he giggled and wrapped his arms around you. from that moment on, he would occasionally whisper je t'aime into your ear. he loves you so much omg. 

you play sports together. it doesn’t matter what it is; be it volleyball, tennis or soccer. you’re both a power duo in every game you play and everyone’s scared to play again the two of you. it helps that your boyfriend is one of the most notable liberos in japan. 

komori likes watching anything with you. sometimes when you’re both too tired to go out, he’ll set up his tv to watch whatever you’re in the mood for. one day you might catch up on my hero academia. another day you might be sniffling at a romcom. he likes romcoms more than he’d like to admit but he tells you about this guilty pleasure to appease your love for the genre. 

you mentioned to him once that you liked handwritten letters and komori made it his personal mission to write one for you personally once a month. they’re always so heartfelt, a clear reflection of him and his emotions towards you. he enjoys writing them as much as he enjoys the expression on your face when you read them. 

he seems to be the greek mythology enthusiast himself so he loves talking to you about it. and by enthusiast, i mean that komori was one of those kids who owned the whole entire percy jackson series. since the most that he knows about greek mythology is whatever is written in the percy jackson books, he lets you sit with him and educate him on the extensive lore of the gmcu (greek mythology cinematic universe). 

he loves hearing you talk about astrology and gets into it himself. he can’t help it, especially with the bright smile you hold on your face whenever you talk about it. when he first found out about your astrological compatibility, he was over the moon. the grin that he had on his face was so big that you thought that it looked like the moon itself. he’s downloaded co-star and reads his and your horoscope sometimes. 

date idea! 

komori decided to take you to a cat cafe after you mentioned the idea of it to him once. it’s a very him thing to do, to remember something you’ve told him offhandedly once and immediately make something big out of it. 

the second you step in, your eyes glimmer with delight as they land on the multitude of cats in the vicinity. you don’t even look back to him at once, swerving your attention to the cafe’s residents. at least you’re holding his hand still, he thinks. maybe he’s a little jealous but hey, the visible joy on your face beats his concern over being prioritised after felines living in a cafe. 

after what seemed like hours of cat-petting, you both sat to order, the food arriving in a pleasingly timely fashion. the lunch items were delicious, the desserts were divine but komori was even more drawn to the soft look of adoration on your face as you stared at a calico cat that frequently passed by the two of you. 

this might’ve been his best date idea yet, he thought. 

[haircarecetres-blog]

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[starman-john-tracy]

Radiation Poisoning | Chapter Two

by @starman-john-tracy and @asteria-star

In which John Tracy gets exposed to uranium and nearly dies, The Hood is evil, and Star generally freaks out a lot.

[Chapter One] [Chapter Three]

Star nods at him, bringing up her own scanner, just to prove it’s there. The readings are well and truly in the green. She sighs.

“Well then, we’d better get a move on.”

She’s not even embarrassed about the fact she clings to him on the way over anymore, thin fingers hooked into the gaps between his sash and his body. It’s quiet out there, just the sound of her breathing and John’s own, transmitting through the speaker by her ear with a slight crackle of interference.

The other ship is big, bigger than Thunderbird Five, looming out of the darkness like the titanic through fog, destined to sink. Star tries peering around, looking to see if the explosion is evident from the outside, but to her it just looks… abandoned. But John knows where he’s going, John leads the way.

As they arrive John gently peels her fingers from his sash and takes them in his own, leading her by the hand around the hull. A dark maw of broken, twisted metal, with jagged teeth and a black insides, greets them - evidently where the ship has been blown open by the explosion. Debris floats in a solemn cloud around the opening, bits and pieces of anything that wasn’t strapped down have been sucked out into space, along with ripped, mangled pieces of the ship’s hull. A big shard of metal bumps against John’s hip and he twists to kick it away from them before it can do any damage. The radiation scanner bleeps at his wrist. Dark green, rising.

There’s no sign of any occupants.

“Broadcasting all frequencies, this is International Rescue.” There’s a beat of a pause as John anticipates a response. There is none. “This facility appears to be leaking dangerous nuclear radiation, the two people onboard are strongly advised to abandon ship while we seal up the leak.”

The creak of the metal hull is the only kind of response he gets. It reminds him, eerily, of the Eden. The ghost ship. The fine hairs at the back of his neck prickle. He squeezes Star’s hand, just a little, though it’s not clear if he realises he’s doing it.

“This is International Rescue.” He tries again, “Are you receiving us?”

Still nothing. Odd. His shoulders roll through a shrug, and he turns a smile toward Star to reassure her, very aware that she’s far out of her comfort zone. He’s yet to let go of her hand for this reason.

“Perhaps their radio’s are damaged.” He suggests, optimistically, unaware that the occupants are far too busy to be checking something as trivial as the radio. “Let’s head inside and see if we can do something about all this leaking radiation, ok?”

‘If I end up getting haunted by some space ghost going in here, I’m going to be very upset,’ Star tells him, hand still squeezing his bony fingers. Every now and again they squeeze back, wrangling her nerves into something resembling okay. The hulking great mass of metal and charred edges looks dangerous, the very fact it was used as something other than a war machine seemed impossible. Damaged radio. Yeah, like hell, whoever is over there knows there’ll be consequences once they’re found.

Star’s gloved hand comes away black when she hooks her fingers around the wounded metal to drag herself inside. It’s somehow colder than being out in the dark expanse of nothingness outside, and Star tells herself that’s why she shivers, that it’s not the feeling of being watched. John is going to owe her at least three screenings of dumb war movies when we’re done here, she thinks, and he’s not allowed to complain about my country music on the speakers any more.

Regardless of John’s hand her own, Star almost turns tail and runs at what they find inside.... She’d have taken him with her. There’s been an explosion, yes, but there was no way to even pretend that it had been an accident now that she’s seeing it with her own two eyes. The actual fuel compartment is relatively empty, a sodding great hole blasted through the reinforced steel, but the storage vault that must have held back up canisters is hanging ominously open, a localised blast in the centre of the locking mechanism, canisters of radioactive poison spread far and wide. It looks like someone had been rummaging through the stock, and it looks like more than a handful are leaking.

“I’m starting to think the crowbar might have been a good idea,” Star murmurs, looking to John for what to do next, because she has no idea how to even begin to fix this.

“There’s no such thing as ghosts.” John murmurs, offhand, distracted. His eyes comb over damaged machinery and twisted metal - searching amongst the drifting detritus for signs of life or the source of the radiation, as he glides in alongside her. “And if there were,” He adds, “no ghost caused this.” There’s a shake of his head as he checks the instruments at his wrist, “No heat signatures on short range either. They must be further in.”

It’d be nice to have gravity, but like most of the stations systems, the artificial reproduction of it seems to be offline. There're no lights or door sensors or, as John gathers from his scans, there's no breathable air being pumped around the space station.

“You alright?” He looks across to Star to check, releasing her hand from the safety of his grip so that he can comb his fingers over the panelling, caught up in the crudity of the historical 2040s design. There’s a partially open door out to their left, leading deeper into the Xz197.

Star nods absently at his question, not taking her eyes off the ruined lock. She knows a break in when she sees one. Looking up at her, John finds himself following her eyeline with interest.

The broken-into cabin off to the opposite side of the door is clearly some kind of old storage vault, with a few rows of refueling canisters still there, all sinisterly labelled with big, black radiation symbols.

“Right, you stay here and keep an eye out for anyone for me,” John says, already ducking under the open bulkhead for a closer look inside. The little gauge at his wrist ticks up a level, moving to a pale greenish orange. “The metal around the breach was all twisted inwards, like it was pushed from the outside in,” Even as he gets further away, his voice remains clear over the radio, as if he were still floating right next to her, “I think someone caused the explosion specifically to get in here,” He’s evidently caught onto what she’s thinking, “People who are allowed aboard these things usually use an access hatch, which means these guys are either thieves or very, very lost.” That could almost be a joke from John Tracy, though it’s delivered so deadpan it’s hard to tell. “I’m just gonna seal up these tanks as best I can. I’ve got plenty of solder, it won’t take me long. Hang tight Star.”

The radiation bumps up to a light orange, warning. John sets to work, head down, tracing cracks in thick, old metal containers. Green smudges on the blue of his fingers, and he tracks where the solder needs to go. It’s lucky his spacesuit is made of some pretty strong stuff.

Suddenly, Star hears what could only be the scrape of moving metal somewhere aboard the station, reverberating into their conjoined rooms. Somewhere, someone has moved something heavy, and it wasn’t John, who's still diligently working away. The slightly open doorway to her left is a strong candidate for where the sound came from.

“John,” Star says in a low, even voice, not needing to shout for the radio to pick up her words. The sound has come from the door across the room, left ajar by someone; perhaps in a hasty retreat, or absently, carrying stolen radioactive material, unaware they’d just been walked in on. “I can hear someone moving around out here.’

She drifts to the broken door John is behind and peers in the gap. She can see him working away, see the radiation scanner flickering orange while her own stays a nearly-safe green. The grating shriek rattles the ship's skeleton again, and when Star’s head snaps around to look, she has no doubt it has come from behind the other door.

“Finish what you’re doing,” Star tells John, reaching for a length of ruined pipe that’s almost as thick and long as her arm, plucking it out of the air. “I’m going to see who this is, don’t stay in there any longer than you have to, alright?”

Hooking her fingers into the seams of the wall, Star starts dragging herself to investigate the sound.

"You can what?" He sounds worried about the fact she’s heard something he hasn’t, "I… Alright," He agrees reluctantly. It makes sense for her to check it out while he himself continues working. The radiation leak is the priority. John's already got a long strip of solder out and has flipped down the sun visor on his helmet so that he can start welding up the splits in the metal, with the intention of making the canisters safe to move out for proper disposal. "The mess out there looks like it was a pretty big explosion. There could be someone injured who needs our help."

Because of course he's worried about who they might need to rescue, instead of thinking that anyone could possibly want to harm a couple of miscellaneous astronauts, who are most definitely barging in on their plans. It’s probably lucky that John hasn’t spotted the length of pipe Star’s grabbed. A well-placed, or misplaced, blow from that thing to a spacesuit, helmet or oxygen tank could not just incapacitate but kill the wearer.

And IR happens to be very against killing the people they’re here to save, even if they are up to no good.

“Be careful.” John does take a second to warn her, not completely complacent, as she’s ducking through the door - though he doesn’t look up from his task as he says it, the first thin silver line of solder stopping up the leak. “Be quick and quiet and let me know what you find. I’ll keep the radio channel open.” He’d never leave her completely alone out here, after all. She can hear the reassuring, soft in and out of his breathing in her ear as a silence falls between them.

The corridor is long and dark, tubes and wires lining its walls and plenty of hook rungs over head to hold onto while the station is without gravity. It’s quite different from the spaces of Five, but the weightless, floating feeling does remain the same wherever out here.

Bulkheads open and close creakily at her touch and there’s a whole number of little rooms off the main corridor. A dark little lab, a room of cramped, ugly bunk beds, a galley with a small kitchenette. This station must have been a grand thing in its heyday. Grand, but with a sinister purpose. Instead of the scientific curiosity and wonder that should have come with humanity breaching the edge of space and actually living there, the Xz197 and a small number crafts like it, were built instead for lording over the lesser people far, far below. Designed to carry a payload of deadly chemicals and waiting for an excuse to use them. The war itself was apparently excuse enough.

Just what kind of people had lived up here? Could people willing to deploy such weapons even really be called people at all?

The savagery of the wars of the 2040s had, at the time, been a sticking point for moon-locked Astronaut Jeff Tracy, for sure. It’s easy to imagine John’s father young and fierce and furious with the whole madness and pointless cruelty of it. The era of peace and the formation of the United Nations and the GDF and later the Thunderbirds that had followed all seem, in the light of it, almost like a rebellion against the savage ideas of their forefathers.

There’s not a single weapon aboard any of the Thunderbirds, despite that being exactly what some people who want to get their hands on them would use them for. The image of Two decked out with machine guns would be utterly horrifying to all of them.

At the end of the corridor, the space opens out into a shuttle bay and… There! There’s a slim, shadowed figure with a black spacesuit and a dark, silver striped helmet that cleverly obscures his face. He’s busy loading small black canisters into crates, evidently to be put aboard a smaller, much newer ship that’s docked here. He doesn’t seem to notice Star’s silent, floating presence behind him.

Suddenly, there’s a cut off: “What the…?” and a sharp, startled gasp of John’s breathing, loud enough over Star’s speakers to be heard outside of her helmet. It means this section of the ship must have an oxygen supply, but it also means she has bigger problems.

It’s not that Star's brain doesn’t predict the consequences of her actions, it’s just that she doesn’t care. John gasps, and Star forgoes any thought of her own danger, head snappy around to look back in his direction, calling out his name.

“John?”

Of course, if the masked man had, by some miracle, not heard John, he’d definitely heard her.

“Oi! You!” The man’s head has snapped up, and he’s staring right at her, “What d’you think you’re doin’ on ‘ere!” The canisters get discarded and the man -whoever he is- lunges at the intruder. John hasn’t immediately responded, sending a sick spike of worry through her chest that leaves no patience or concern for the man coming for her.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” she tells him, bracing herself feet under the lip of a peeling sheet of flooring. He keeps advancing on her. She tries the John Tracy method of de-escalation again. “Who are you?”

Old Mirror-Helmet doesn’t offer up an answer. He’s reaching for a weapon at his hip, and Star doesn’t know enough about space-pirates to tell if it's an earth gun the idiot is hoping will fire, or something that will actually do some damage. ‘Okay, fine,’ Star tells him. With her feet braced against the floor, Star manages to swing her length of pipe with enough momentum to land the blow with a sickening crunch against the man's outstretched arm.

Judging by the way he shrieks, Star assumes he wishes he’d listened to her. The man's suit doesn’t seem damaged, the weapon floating outside of arms reached, released by damaged fingers, and Star works quickly. She’s got John's space-repair version of cable ties in the pocket of her sash and uses them to tie the still shocked man to a pipe against the wall. She snarled at the man. “What have you done?”

John still hasn’t responded. “John? John, answer me! Are you okay?”

"What the hell?!? I'm jus' doin' my job!" The man she's zip-tied, howling, to a radioactive space station protests at her. "What have you done?" She can hear the scowl in his voice. "I think you've broke me bloody arm! Boss said there wasn't goin’ t'be anyone aboard, said this old wreck was abandoned, nngh, years ago." He twists in place, trying to relieve some of the pressure on his definitely-broken arm. "Are yew pirates?" He demands, "And who the hell is John?" He adds; an afterthought ground out through audibly gritted teeth. He swears again explosively, evidently preoccupied with the pain. "The boss'll get you for this."

“I’m going to go ahead and advise that you get a new job,” Star snarls, tightening the cord around his wrist until there isn’t a breath of wriggle room. “If you behave I might even send someone up here to collect you, before your oxygen runs out.”

In her defence, the knock she gives the man to the head is only enough to knock him out. No permanent damage, she doesn’t think…

There's nothing but crackling feedback inside Star's helmet. John doesn't respond to her calling his name, but she can still hear him breathing, short and sharp. There’s a step of what could be feet kicking a solid surface and John groans, low, in her ear.

John still hasn’t said a word, but for the minute, Star can hear him breathing, hear him moving around, hear him moaning. Star can hear her own panting, slightly panicked breathing over it all, but before she can go pelting after him, her eyes catch the trolley of uranium canisters loaded into the shuttle. We’re International rescue, we’re here to help, echoes in the back of her mind, and Star curses John's contagious conscience.

‘Goddammit John,’ she growls, turning away from the direction to save him, hoping he can hold his own for a moment longer, and gets to work.

Back over in the canister storage room John is trying to work out just what had hit him. Or more accurately, who. A shadowy figure had dropped from a hatch above him with enough force to slam the unsuspecting Tracy down hard against the floor, his head ricocheting inside his helmet with concussive force and the half-sealed canister he was working on tumbling from his grip in the process. It rolls, weightless and leaking, in the air between them.

There's a heavy whirring somewhere as something deep within the bowels of the ship grinds online and the thick, heady weight of old, artificial gravity drags all the occupants down toward the floor. The oxygen reserves seem to have kicked in onboard as well, but they do little good where John is, with the huge whole in the hull leaking the precious O2 right out into space, with no door between him and the void.

Star’s sensors would pick it up though.

"Ah, finally." Says a horribly familiar voice, somewhere above John - who’s finding the sudden gravity less helpful for orienting himself than expected. "I was beginning to think that it would never finish warming up.” They comment and the toe of a dark boot jams under John’s helmet, rotating his head upward, forcing his neck over at an odd angle, “Well now, what do we have here?"

Ginger lashes flutter open only to be faced with a helmet-shadowed face that he sees in bad dreams more often than he’d like to admit. Only the man is not looming and holographic, but flesh-and-blood real: watching him intently, calculatingly with sharp yellow eyes.

The Hood takes in the orange sash and shocked face and grins.

[hollenka99]

The One Where Jackie Settles In

Summary: Chapter 3. Jackie gets used to life with Marvin.

Warnings: death mention, violence mention

@bupine @badlypostedeverything

In the minute it takes for Jackie's mind to wake up along with him, he becomes confused as to why his chest is in agony. More confusing than that, he appeared to be in the bedroom of someone's home. In a pile on a bean bag was a pre-arranged outfit for him to wear. Dressed, he ventures to the hallway. And things finally click. Right, he was living with Marvin now. Marvin, who happened to also be Cat. The past 24 hours had been quite eventful. He'd… rather forget it. He requests anything Marvin had on hand. If he was a superhero, surely he was no stranger to injury. Therefore, there must be something lying around to assist with pain management. To his relief, Marvin can indeed help him. In fact, he goes further and offers him whatever is required for his recovery. With the medical care over, Marvin invites his new roommate to help himself to mini Weetabix or bread. Jackie doesn't think he can manage more than a simple buttered slice of toast this morning. The Russian blue missing her front left leg observes them from her shelf. Marvin notices where Jackie's gaze is directed. "Indie's watching us eat, isn't she?" "Yep." Jackie chuckles. "Come face us, you little spy." Marvin turns around in his seat, wearing a mock scowl. "Caoimhe was like that. I couldn't eat anything at home without her staring at me until I gave her a bit of my dinner." Marvin is facing the table again. "Caoimhe?" "Oh um... she was my dog before- before all this." "Is she with friends or something?" "I guess. Them or my dad. It all happened so quickly." Suddenly, stories relating to pets fill the space between toast and soggy cereal. Jackie learns of the time Indie somehow found herself stuck in the space between the television and the wall. Likewise, he tells his friend all about Caoimhe's misadventures as a puppy, including her habit of attempting to snack on his drumsticks. This in turn leads to Jackie confirming that yes, he was a drummer and guitar wasn't his preferred instrument. The two of them chat at the table until Marvin realises in a shock that it was already time for him to get ready for work. Running late slightly, he blurts out his apologises and suggests Jackie finds a DVD to watch while he's alone. Despite how abruptly it had ended, the morning had been an enjoyable one. Joel checks up on them a couple days after the incident with Anti. He raises the issue of Jackie not having any clothes of his own. The Canadian offers to accompany him around the shops, making the point it would be a proper chance to get to know each other. With the promise expenses shouldn't influence decisions, they leave. They manage to collect a variety of tops and jeans. Apparently ripped jeans were fashionable now. Fashion had certainly changed in the past three decades. He and Joel are still able to find items that were close enough to what he used to know. The shops they visit are lacking in leather jackets but Joel is able to offer a black denim one as a compromise. With socks and underwear also in their possession, it was time to move on from clothes shopping. Almost. Doing so as discreetly as he can, Joel mutters quietly to Jackie. "I can see you eyeing the women's section. Why don't you have a look?" "No, it's weird. Trust me, men were not made to wear feminine clothing." "Listen, I have two dads and a diminished sense of gendered clothing. I am the last person who will give a damn about a guy wearing a dress. You have a similar build to my dad so..." Joel approaches the racks, flicking through them. Periodically, he scrutinises Jackie to likely determine if the dress was right for him. The most Jackie lets his new friend buy for him is a skirt that reached his knees. It seems to please him that Jackie allowed him to get even that. He supposes it was a nice garment. And a kind gesture too. With the clothes stuffed into the back seat of Joel's car, the duo return to explore the Tesco Metro. The older of the two triggers a whole conversation about Easter celebrations. Joel talks about the Beaches Easter parade in Toronto while Jackie grumbles about Easter Sunday masses. They both agree there's no such thing as too many Easter eggs. "Hey, you should get a notebook or something. It might help if you have somewhere to put your thoughts about the 21st century." "What, you want me to write you an essay about modern life when I've known nothing else? I'm 20, I was born in... 1999." "It's April so if you want to turn 21 this year, it's 1998." "Wh- 'if I want to turn 21 this year'? Can I please get through the rest of this month without having my life being threatened?" Joel groans. "No, dumbass, it was advice." He leans close to Jackie's ear. "I know about Village Square and how you were born in 1966. I'm sure you want to talk about this further but I don't have anywhere I can really take you to speak privately." "You're psychic?" "No." Joel places his bags down, resigning himself to tackle this subject while standing outside a WHSmiths. "Sure, I can create portals but I'm no mind reader." "Then how-?" "I already told you, this is not a conversation we should have in public." "What about your apartment? You don't live with Marvin and you told me you weren't living on the streets anymore." "In Canada. And I doubt it would be healthy to send you somewhere over 3500 miles away when you sustained a major injury a few days ago. Listen, how about you text- A phone, we need to get you a phone too." "Right." Mobile phones are unrecognisable. How the hell did technology advance to the point where this small slab of glass and alloy was capable of receiving calls? Not to mention the plethora of things it also offered. And controlled by your fingers on top of it all off. Joel reassures him he can take it slow with this technological leap. The main reason he bought it was for communication and it could remain so if he wanted. Jackie supposes the shiny blue back was pretty. It wasn't hard, growing accustomed to life with Marvin. His roommate would sleep in after a long night of patrolling then spend most afternoons working a shift at the local garden centre. In addition to that, Marvin would also don his Magnificent Cat costume twice a week so he could help those still on the streets. Jackie usually sat those out, feeling awkward about his new situation. Marvin was typically the one to cook. As such, Jackie felt it necessary the head of the kitchen should be aware he couldn't have mustard. If the hero could try getting into the habit of checking ingredients and being wary of anything labelled 'spices', he'd be much obliged. Marvin does his best to follow these instructions. It seemed to be working fine as there was yet to be any allergic reactions. At some point during that second week, Marvin invited Jackie to the kitchen. His plan was to bake his favourite cake, one containing chocolate and strawberries. Their joint efforts go well for a short while. Then Jackie gave himself an edible moustache upon stealing the whipped cream from the fridge. Marvin confiscated the can, only to follow suite. By the time the cake was ready to exit the oven, the duo were laughing, in need of a whipped cream restock and a change of clothes. It is after returning from a shift that Marvin introduces Jackie to an unusual pizza crust arrangement. "Pizza Hut have the best stuffed crust though. This is only the best Morrisons has to offer, as far as I've tried it." Marvin continues on, rambling about how, while studying at university, he made it his goal to find the best frozen pizza supermarkets within walking distance of his accommodation had to offer. As such, he had designated this specific pizza as his favourite. Something about the other varieties being too liquidy or whatever. He has no interest in this subject. Pizza was pizza. But... Marvin seemed very engrossed in imparting his findings to him and who was Jackie to stop him? "Oh, tell you who would go with us to Pizza Hut, my friends Henrik and Jameson. Maybe Chase too but he tends to be a rather busy guy. You should meet them. I think you might get on with those guys." Marvin makes a note as a reminder to invite his friends for a meal out. For the time being, that is the end of that. Before long, the Easter weekend arrives and with it, a chance for Jackie to finally meet Sean. It was clear Marvin looked up to his big brother from the way he spoke about him. As far as Jackie was aware, Sean was 9 years older, a video game developer and a reluctant cook, hence why the two roommates were taking care of the big meal. He can certainly see the resemblance between the brothers. Their features were very similar. The main difference between them was hair. While Marvin was clean shaven with waves descending to his shoulders, Sean had stubble and short straight hair. It was pleasant to see them have such a good relationship, complete with teasing and half-serious threats of burning the other if he kept pushing it. Jackie found Sean likeable. The whole meal, they kept themselves occupied with chatter. He learns Sean enjoyed painting in his spare time. In fact, he was creating the backgrounds for his company's new game. It is at this point that Marvin lets him know there was still a blue smudge, albeit slightly faded, on the side of his left hand. The afternoon is a good one but like all things, it comes to an end. Before too long, they are bidding Sean farewell and exchanging comments about the day's success. Night, the stranger found, was the best cover. Some dark clothes to reduce visibility and a hood to better conceal his identity from CCTV cameras. With some silent fiddling, the door grants him entry. He knows precisely which room he has to visit first. His most recent escapee is completely oblivious to the intruder. He could ensure Jackie never woke up with a single touch. But Marvin would discover the truth were that to happen. That method was too obvious. Besides, this wasn't what he was here for. The envelope slips out of his bag. In the morning, Jackie will find the surprise on his bedside table. That done, he moves on to the other bedroom. The hero is still awake, albeit engrossed by his phone's screen. Only now does Anti allow his presence to be sensed. Marvin reacts accordingly by throwing the covers to the side and defensively leaping to his feet. A palm is raised to prevent any provocative action before it could be carried out. The message is delivered. "Back off, Marvin. You should know by now what I'm like when frustrated. Let the next one slide and you won't hear from me for a good while." He looks like a three year old persevering with their poorly thought out argument. He's certainly a 24 year old man in his pyjamas rather than an on duty superhero fully in costume. "I... I can't." "One life for several. Aren't you supposed to be on the better side of the morality spectrum? Surely this is a easy choice." Anti doesn't wait for any potential response from Marvin. The serial killer leaves the way he came. The sun rises and with it, Jackie. Marvin was already awake, cradling an abandoned coffee. He gives his friend little acknowledgement as he enters the kitchen. The piece of paper Jackie is holding, however, gains his attention. Especially when he asks the dreaded question. "Uh, Marv? Do you know anything about this?" It's only a portion of an A4 sheet. A pair of scissors has been used perhaps a third of the way down. The contents is limited to a single typed line which reads: We both know he's no doctor. Maybe you should ask why he hasn't taken you to be treated by professionals. Jackie starts talking as soon as he's sure Marvin has read the message. "I- Listen, I will admit I had wondered why you never sent me to a hospital. But I guess I brushed it off as a secret identity thing. So why didn't-?" "You're new to this city, right?" "Yes." "So you don't know Anti like I do. He likes making a point of finishing what he started. I don't know how the hell he does it. But if he's the one who put you in hospital, the only place you're going after that is the morgue. So forgive me for wanting you still around. And yeah, it's true, I am not a doctor. However, books on human biology and the internet have served me fine. I've had way more injuries than Sean is aware of. Yet here I am, walking around despite the occupational hazards my hobby is littered with." "Marvin-" "If you want me to apologise for prioritising you staying alive, then I'm afraid you're out of luck." The aggression radiating from him remains for several seconds. It dissipates into something softer. "But I am sorry for putting the decision solely in my hands. If that means anything." Jackie lets the air settle between them before answering. "Alright. Listen, I am still upset-" "Fine, then I'll leave for a while." Marvin begins making his way to the shoe pile by the door. "What I was going to say was I'm still upset but I'd rather move on and let bygones be bygones for now. Just promise you won't do something that risky again." He stops completely to face Jackie. "Yes, of course. I promise." "Thank you. And, as a sidenote, if you're going to run from disagreements, at least fix that mess you call your hair. It's horrendous." The sleep deprived hero scoffs, a tiny smile creeping into existence. "Got it."

[gamebomb04-blog]

Vivo clinic Birmingham Reviews

just How To get Rid Of Cellulite From Your Legs, bum and Tum.

Content

What Foods reason Cellulite?

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let's speak About ... City Skin.

We were founded in January 2017 and have developed significant expertise in temperature level controlled storage, and gas/cryo systems tools and also engineering. We're based down on Cardiff Docks in Wales, and also have an aspiration to service clients worldwide with solutions to any type of sort of cryogenic or storage problems. The clinical literature has numerous reports of varying cryogenic freezing technics. Additionally, the density, place as well as hydration of the target cells can influence results.

Does dry brushing help cellulite?

Dry brushing can help get rid of dead skin cells and stimulate blood flow, but there's no scientific evidence that it reduces or eliminates cellulite. If you're looking to diminish the appearance of cellulite, there are a number of other treatments that are more effective at reducing cellulite than dry brushing.

Skin that feels and look plumped and also rejuvenated-- all within an issue of minutes. " Whether cryotherapy is used on the body or face, it provokes vasoconstriction-- a reduction of the blood vessel size," clarifies Dr. Yannis Alexandrides, surgeon and also owner of 111 Skin. This restriction can prompt a large selection of benefits, including discomfort alleviation, muscle recovery as well as stronger skin.

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Our initial product, released in 1985, was the Cryostream cooler, which revolutionised the process of reduced temperature level information collection in X-ray diffraction. Today, the business has a broad series of items aimed at low temperature information collection, from open flow coolers for single crystal diffraction to flat-plate chambers for powder diffraction. It's stated that an excellent dose of sunlight is good for your body and also with this innovation the light waves your skin is subjected to together with the cool temperature level has numerous benefits for your consumers. More DetailsWith over 40 years experience of collaborating with clinical as well as rehabilitation gadgets, our company believe we are able to offer the most effective degree of service in the marketplace. With all the current test devices as well as using up to day solution requirements, we can ensure your devices are operating properly as well as efficiently. SiVL is a phrase for Super insulated Vacuum Lines, essentially a sort of thermos flask yet in tubular kind.

Cryo Health provide a complete choice of cryotherapy treatments from our Brentwood center. You can locate details on what you can get out of your cryotherapy experience and the treatments readily available making use of the links below.

ENERGETIC Cryofacial therapy is a cryogenic therapy utilizing a local cryotherapy equipment to use ultra-cooled Nitrogen gas to the targeted body location i.e. face, scalp and neck. Pressurised liquid nitrogen vapours are carefully blown over the surface area of the scalp, face and also neck. The look of the face is improved instantly as pores diminish and also facial inflammation and also "puffiness" are decreased, reduction of lines, creases, acne. The skin comes to be tighter, a lot more even-toned, and blood flow is enhanced. Over time, the skin of the face gains back flexibility due to the increase in collagen manufacturing which reinforces the skin, hair and also nails along with getting rid of & purging away toxins. ENERGETIC Cryofacials can also be utilized to treat inflammatory skin conditions consisting of acne, psoriasis, eczema and also rosacea.

Liquid Cryo provides a highly concentrated cold for a successful therapy. Our cryosurgical devices are furnished with a particular fluid gas application applicator. The driver can manage the release of sufficient liquid N2O to deal with sores without wasting gas. With a temperature of -89 ° C/ -128 ° F the fluid gas is evaporating on the lesion. A freeze thaw freeze method is advised to achieve maximum results. This process causes the cells of the cells to be damaged due to the cell membrane layer fracturing therefore of ice crystal formation within the cell. With the Cyro 21 tools these fat cells are targeted by producing a thermal shock that decreases the surface temperature level as well as completely removes the fat cells using a procedure called "apoptosis".

comparative research Of Cryopen and Also liquid Nitrogen In Actinic Keratosis.

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The Cryo Ball is offered you by Cryo Express and also is distributed from our centre in the UK. This ball of wonder supplies all the benefits of a traditional self myo-fascial release in combination with cryotherapy. It will certainly reduce inflammation, pain as well as swelling and the benefits can be really felt quickly. These 2 forms of treatment permits details therapy on any type of area of the body.

Hifu Face & Skin tightening Treatments.

If the liquid nitrogen is at -180 or two in the storage vessel, it requires to be delivered at -180 at the factor of use. An SiVL pipework system does just that, securing the fluid gas from warm and warmth as well as minimising the boil-off, providing cold liquid nitrogen to your biobanks, cryostats, or experiments.

How long does it take to get rid of cellulite?

Several studies and researches done on cellulite show that if treated in a proper way it takes around 15-30 days to go away.

The tool is electrically sustained to ensure the cold air within the chamber is dry, not wet. There is a big distinction between both the therapy as well as experience in a completely dry chamber, integrated to a damp one.

This set cell fatality occurs normally in the body at all times, the treatment with Cyro 21 merely speeds up this procedure to get the immediate results consumers need. Cryotherapy essentially suggests cool treatment as well as it is anything yet brand-new. First use cold therapy goes as much back as 2500 BCE when the Egyptians used it to deal with injuries as well as inflammation.

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Invite to Cryo Health, we provide a series of entire body cryotherapy therapies to aid healing, handle pain, improve sports efficiency as well as provide a whole range of beauty as well as anti-ageing benefits. This makes it possible for a quick decline in surface skin temperature, while preserving the capacity to operate throughout the day. Unlike various other cooling down techniques, such as contact air conditioning, cryogen spray or ice packs, the Cryo 6 reduces the skin temperature quicker, with much less risk of skin burns and maintains a constant dosage throughout the whole treatment time. According to Ada Ooi, facialist and also founder of 001 Skin care, cryotherapy may be able to supply a visible increase to the skin's surface area, from the inside out. " Cryotherapy uses sub-zero temperature level to offer a cool shock to the skin, which will send fresher blood to the targeted location," she clarifies. " Even more blood suggests more oxygen, as well as a richer nutrient distribution, which flushes away toxins and also lowers water retention." The result?

Your body's body immune system will certainly after that normally refine the fat and eliminate dead cells as well as you can experience as much as a 40% reduction of fat cells in the treated location which will subsequently cause a decrease of the fat layer density. Whether you choose to submerse your whole body into minus 85 levels or our rejuvenating cleansed air facial treatment you will certainly experience the power of cold like never ever in the past. At-home alternatives are plentiful when it concerns icy devices as well as therapies.

As facialists look for to prolong their powers past the hair salon, numerous have introduced at-home products. Available at Harvey Nichols, the brand's special Cryo Maker uses a stick that requires -30 level air on the face.

But if the biopsy reveals some locations to be extremely slow-growing, these may not be treated.

Mottet N, Bellmunt J, Briers E, Van den Bergh RCN, Bolla M, Van Casteren NJ, et al

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These will certainly impact each guy in different ways, and you might not get every one of them.

University University London Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust Fund; 2014.

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" This constricts the muscle mass, lifting and firming their look while relaxing inflammation, lowering pore dimension and sebum production," clarifies Alexandrides. While it's definitely a less relaxing experience than a massage therapy with a physical ice roller, the much deeper penetration is claimed to supply greater than surface-level benefits, tightening the skin on a reduced degree. Now, just like other alternative treatments-- believe gua sha and also acupuncture-- cryotherapy has been fine-tuned right into facial treatments, designed to function specifically on our complexions. Our specifically developed applicator specifically targets particular body areas with reduced- frequency sound waves. https://southampton.lipo-sculpt.co.uk/ and also shakes the layer of fat cells listed below the skin's surface area. It incorporates home heating as well as cooling down to safely and successfully remove fat cells.

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Featuring 360 ° air conditioning plates, a delivery of heat will certainly be put on the location being dealt with, which is created to improve blood flow and also is after that followed by a cooling process, which will drop down to minus temperature levels. Our clinically authorized cryotherapy chamber has actually been built on 7 years of experience and also has been utilized by various specialist sports individuals around the globe. Our maker has been designed to the greatest specification in order to provide 100% secure usage, reliability as well as top quality, permitting you to have the best feasible experience.

A cryo chamber is not a medical device as well as needs to not be taken into consideration a clinical tool. Dependence on any kind of details showing up on this site is solely at your very own risk. This decrease in temperature level will after that start to ice up the fat cells in the targeted location without creating any kind of damage to your skin.

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The info, consisting of but not limited to, text, graphics, pictures as well as various other product contained on this web site are for informational objectives just. The objective of this site is to advertise broad consumer understanding as well as understanding of cryotherapy. It is not meant to be a substitute for expert clinical suggestions. Cryotherapy is not suggested as a kind of treatment for any disease or illness without direction from your healthcare specialist.

Contemporary cryotherapy can be mapped to 1989 in Japan where Professor Yamauchi used a chamber to treat the effects of rheumatism in his individuals. Today, Whole Body Cryotherapy is made use of by best clubs and also professional athletes throughout the globe to improve the after sporting activities healing, reduce swelling as well as stop injuries. Additionally, cryotherapy has actually demonstrated to likewise have anti-analgesic, anti-oxidant impacts as well as enhance blood circulation, mood and rest, speed up the metabolism, strengthen the body immune system as well as rejuvenate the skin.

[magnetvrs]

my @kyluxsecretsanta fic for @litchi-prince <3 I hope you enjoy!

tags: kylux, HS au, fluff, first kiss

Mr Skywalker was far from Hux’s favourite teacher. He was nice enough but that had never impressed Hux - Hux didn’t really know how to handle nice people, he always felt like he was ready for everyone to bite him and when they didn’t he felt off-balance. 

His room always felt like it had a layer of dust covering everything - the books that lined the walls, crammed in on overburdened shelves and his desk which was covered with knick-knacks that almost drove Hux to distraction with the urge to sweep them all off into a big plastic bin bag and throw them into the bins at the back of the kitchen - just to have a little order in the place. It was really like an emperor's ancient tomb filled with all his worldly possessions and left untouched for centuries, except a little more scatterbrained and untidy. Mr Skywalker himself seemed like a bit of a relic, not just because of his wild hair and weathered face and the strange robes he seemed to favour - sometimes he seemed like he was from a different planet entirely. 

It was a shame really because Hux did love history; he spent many evenings with his nose buried in musty old textbooks in his room, as his only companion. It was his favourite subject, one that he could always pass with his eyes closed even if Mr Skywalker seemed to be able to make everything so boring - with his diplomacy this and his forgiveness that. 

Mr Skywalker did have one redeeming feature, however. 

‘Ben! I won’t tell you again,’ he snapped, turning around from what he was writing on the whiteboard. For all that sometimes he seemed like he was on a different planet, Mr Skywalker did seem to have a sixth sense for Ben Solo and when he was doing something rebellious or obnoxious. Which was, to be fair, almost constantly. 

There was a shuffling sound behind Hux, a few curse words and ‘it’s Kylo’ muttered under his breath before Kylo was slamming his bag down onto the desk next to Hux’s - front and centre, of course. Everything bounced with the force and a few of Kylo’s keychains and pins clattered to the floor but Kylo didn’t seem to notice, slouching down at his desk and picking at his nails. His long hair, streaked obnoxiously with bright colours that Hux was sure didn’t meet school policy - hung like a curtain around Kylo’s face so that Hux couldn’t see his expression. That didn’t stop Hux from aiming a self-satisfied smirk in Kylo’s direction, though. 

Mr Skywalker seemed unsatisfied by this, running his hand through his hair, but doesn’t push it any further. Kylo’s foot was already tapping away underneath the table to some silent beat and Hux watched in sick fascination as the sole of his black converse flopped away from the rest of his shoe with every movement of his foot, as if it might rip off completely. Hux’s own shoes were loafers, black and specifically fitted to his feet that he’d shined that morning. It summed up their entire dynamic really, not exactly enemies but hostile to each other – on complete opposite ends of the social spectrum while both managing to be outcasts. Two extremes.

‘Well, Lei-... Mrs Organa pointed out that a group presentation is a part of your assessment and since you haven’t completed yet…,’ he pauses to clear his throat. ‘I’ve paired you all up and you’ll present your topic to the class next week.’ He picks up a stack of papers and starts placing them on their desks. 

Hux sinks down into his chair as Mr Skywalker places the paper down on his desk. He’s never enjoyed group work, especially not presentations - Hux has either ended up doing all the work himself despite trying to designate it or butting heads when the other group members didn’t like him taking charge. 

He picks up the paper half-heartedly, mentally preparing himself for whatever he’ll have to endure. But when he reads the name, Hux realises that nothing could’ve prepared him. 

**

 ‘Phasma!’ Hux hisses, tugging at her sleeve. ‘Stop staring! He’s going to notice.’

‘I can’t believe Skywalker paired you with him,’ Phasma says, apparently unwilling to drop the subject. But she does at least stop staring and turns back to her own lunch with the barest hint of a smile playing around the corners of her lips. ‘Doesn’t he know you’ll eat him alive?’ 

Hux chokes on his crisps, the sharp pieces scraping the inside of his throat on the way down. ‘What!? Phas?’

Phasma didn’t reply, instead smirking to herself as she ate her pasta.

‘Hey,’ a familiar low pitched voice just over his left shoulder says. Hux wonders, faintly, how long Kylo has been stood there and therefore how much of his panic Kylo had seen. It would certainly be troublesome if Kylo thought he cared about what Kylo thought of him, or had a crush on him or something. Foolish. ‘I guess we’re working together. Skysucker must want you to rescue my grade. You’re top of the class aren’t you?’

Hux takes a moment to cringe at the nickname. 

‘Oh,’ he replies, more snottily than he intended. He sees Phasma silently laughing out of the corner of his eye but elects to ignore her and instead stares steadfastly ahead. 

‘Well, here’s my number if you want to talk about it,’ Kylo says as a hand appears over Hux’s shoulder, holding out a piece of paper. Hux turns to look at Kylo, his gaze sweeping up from Kylo’s outstretched hand to Kylo’s face - where Hux realises, Kylo has a habit of rolling his lip piercing with his tongue. Disgusting. 

‘Yeah,’ he says, snatching the ragged paper from Kylo’s hand and trying not to think about how many germs it could possibly carrying as he shoves it into his pocket. ‘We’ll definitely need to talk. Don’t think that I’m going to work on this on my own, Ben. You don��t get to ride my coattails and half-ass this.’ 

Kylo simply shrugs, obviously unaware of the intimidating aura Hux is attempting to project and heads back to his friends across the cafeteria. 

‘You sure showed him,’ Phasma teases once Kylo is out of earshot. Hux rolls his eyes.

**

His backpack lays discarded on the edge of his bed, the A-Level coursework inside begging to be done - experiment write-ups and graphs and essays that usually Hux would’ve completed with gusto already. Instead Hux stares at his phone, the crumpled sheet of paper clutched between his fingertips. There’s a kind of suffocating anxiety settling in his chest already, at the thought of not having done his work but it’s not getting him to do this any faster. It should be nothing, a string of unconnected numbers shouldn’t intimidate him like this. And yet…

It’s Ben Solo’s number and that alone has Hux frozen, unable to think of anything to write. Was ‘hey’ too simple? Hux isn’t sure that he’s ever said ‘hey’ in his life. Listing off the sections that Hux had already earmarked for Ben seemed a bit too cold and impersonal (not to mention that there were so few of them because Hux wanted to limit the things that Ben would no doubt mess up, and wouldn’t Ben notice that straight away).

There’s no reason to be scared of Ben and his stupid distractingly pale and freckled face, Hux tells himself. He takes a deep breath and starts typing. He’s not used to having someone to text, except for Phasma who he’s known for so long that he doesn’t feel that overwhelming anxiety to keep himself neatly laced up and together around her, as he does around everyone else. 

She’s been there and seen his worst, known his deepest secrets, lived through the terrible haircuts and ache and squeaky voice and come out the other side. She’s practically family so it’s different with her. 

Hello Ben.

He hits send before he can think about it, tossing his phone aside and burying his face in his hands. He thinks that he’d rather die than read Kylo’s reply until his phone actually buzzes and he’s yanking it towards himself without thinking.

Hello Armitage. 

Hux’s teeth sink into his lip and he huffs in annoyance, taking a moment to stare at one of the bare white walls of his bedroom while he composes himself. Kylo is definitely fucking with him.

It’s Hux. I’ll write up the notes since I know more about the Russian Monarchy than you. I’ll send them to you and you can put them into the powerpoint. Do you think you can do that?

He doesn’t leave any room for Kylo to argue with him, simply setting out their roles in this. Hux supposes that if Kylo has a problem with this he’ll no doubt voice it. Sure, it’ll mean Hux doing most of the work but at least he’ll have control and God knows what Kylo would come up with. 

It’s Kylo. Of course, I can. 

Hux snorts in surprise, his fingers playing with a loose thread on his duvet. He’d been expecting Kylo to… well… be more argumentative than that, but it had gone easier than Hux was expecting. Maybe this wouldn’t be too bad after all. 

Should I come over to your place?

Hux reads the message over and over again. A noise from downstairs catches his attention, a barely audible sound that could be someone clearing their throat or the scrape of a chair against the floor.

No. The library tomorrow at lunch. 

Hux sets the phone down safely on his bedside table and takes his bag over to his barren desk, pulling out the lab report that has to be done tomorrow and willing himself to concentrate on it -on anything except for Ben Solo. 

**

The library is busy when Hux gets there, so Hux ends up only being able to find a table at the back - squashed between biology textbooks and medical journals, behind a table of Year 7’s being loud and annoying. Hux glares at them as he pulls out his notes from his backpack and lines up his highlighters in colour order and thankfully, they seem to take the hint and head off outside.

He’s almost given up waiting when Kylo finally shows up, after all, there’s only so many times that Hux can rearrange his highlighters and shuffle his notes. Kylo’s swapped his black ripped jeans for tartan today, covered in chains and zips, and a faded band t-shirt. Hux stares for a moment, trying to make out the band before shaking his head at the faded fabric as if it’s personally offended him.

‘You’re late Ben!’

‘It’s Kylo,’ Kylo shouts back and Hux catches the librarian glancing over towards them. He aims his glare squarely at Kylo. Kylo throws his bag down onto the table, sending Hux’s neatly arranged highlighters scattering across the table. He unzips it with an unnecessary flourish and pulls out a giant, ancient and beaten up looking laptop whose fan buzzes loudly when he opens it up. The back is covered by stickers - bands that Hux has never heard of and skulls and pentagrams, scuffed and peeling away. He catches sight of a rainbow on one corner and averts his gaze, heart hammering in his chest. Was that…?

‘I’m not surprised that your laptop looks like that if you throw your things around. Don’t you care about anything?’ Hux snaps back, unable to disguise his envy - his father would never allow him his own private laptop, even though they could most definitely afford one. There’s just something about Kylo like Hux can’t quite control himself around him - every little thing Kylo does just gets under Hux’s skin. Usually Hux would hate it but again with Kylo… with Kylo it almost makes him feel strong. 

‘Can we just get on with this so I can leave?’ Now that he looks at him, Kylo does look as if he’s being followed around by his own personal rain cloud. Or more so than usual at least. His hair hangs limply around his face, grease caking the roots and there are two angry spots of colour high on Kylo’s elegant cheekbones, just below his more smudged than normal eyeliner.

‘Here are my notes,’ Hux says as he pushes them across the table, shifting easily into business mode and turning off those annoying thoughts that are eating away in the back of his mind. ‘I’ve divided them into sections and highlighted the important parts. All you need to do is make each section into a slide,’ he realises suddenly that he’s talking slower than usual - that he’s trying to annoy Kylo, just because he wants to. ‘If you can do that we’ll call it even, we can share the grade. Even though I’ve done all the work.’ 

Kylo splutters angrily but otherwise doesn’t panic, not bothering to glance at Hux as he pulls the notes towards him. Hux’s eyes narrow and he can feel his brow furrowing. Despite the little he knows about Kylo this is definitely not the usual Kylo - always pushing back, trying to get the final word in.

‘Is something…,’ Hux starts to say before he realises how ridiculous and caring he sounds. He doesn’t want to seem like he’s gone soft. ‘Do you have a problem with that?’

‘I have to go see Leia later,’ Kylo grumbles as if that should be enough to answer all of Hux’s questions, not looking up from where he’s furiously typing away on his laptop.

‘Don’t you mean Mrs Organa,’ Hux says, highlighter poised in mid-air. 

‘I definitely mean Leia,’ Kylo says, popping another M&M into his mouth. ‘She’s my mum after all, she doesn’t mind what I call her as long as I’m still talking to her. We agreed.’ 

‘The Head Teacher is… your mum?’ Hux says slowly. Now that Kylo’s said it he can definitely see the similarities there, something in Kylo’s smile and his high cheekbones. Not that Kylo smiles much. Frankly Hux is surprised that he even knows what Kylo’s smile looks like, but he can see it as clear as day in his head so maybe Hux has been looking more than he’d like to admit - more than he’d even realised. ‘You don’t have the same name?’ He blurts before he can stop himself.

‘My family’s pretty dysfunctional,’ Kylo says, leaving it at that. It’s almost like he’s embarrassed about it, apparently unwilling to expand on this any further. He doesn’t need to though because it hits Hux like a ton of bricks, his chest feels tight with understanding and his lips dry; he’s embarrassed to realise that he’s shaking. It feels like the world has shifted on its axis but nobody else seems to have noticed.

There has been a change though, a spark of connection that’s passed unspoken between them. For the first time, Hux understands - understands Ben Solo, understands Kylo Ren. 

Where Hux conforms, wrapping himself in his order and unity, Kylo Ren rebels - pushing against authority, against everyone, making himself The Other that Mr Antilles the English teacher had kept banging on about in Gothic literature. Hux understands.

He glances over at Kylo again, meeting Kylo’s gaze this time. They share a look for a moment, Hux’s chest squeezing until he’s afraid he’s going to suffocate under the weight of that look - of whatever it is that is passing between them.

‘I have to go,’ he says, the words coming out strangled and half-formed. ‘I’ll do the rest at home.’ He takes off, heart-pounding, unwilling to think about what’s just happened.  

**

Hux runs a comb through his hair one last time, securing that a few flyaways are meticulously glued down flat to his head. He admires his reflection for a moment with a critical eye, noting the impressive circles beneath his eyes that surely every A-Level student approaching exam season has as well as the pale, sallow colour of his skin. Apart from his hair and his clothes, Hux has never particularly cared about his appearance. But apparently in the middle of a school bathroom is the moment his mind has decided that he really should do. He leans closer as if examining his skin in more detail will reveal some unknown secrets and his thoughts turn to Kylo Ren. He shakes his head, trying to rid himself of that thought but too afraid that he knows exactly why he would care about Kylo Ren’s opinion of his appearance. 

The alarm on his watch goes off - only 10 minutes until class, and so Hux gathers up his things and leaves the bathroom. It’s not like he’s going to be late, there’s no need to rush and yet to Hux not being early is as good as being late. The halls are busy but Hux is used to it, ducking around hordes of Year 8’s with P.E. kits and other Sixth Formers who were totally not mitching off to get McDonald’s for lunch in a completely obvious way. He finally reaches the history department, sinking back into the alcove against the wall between rows of lockers as he waits for the previous class to be over. 

He’s not exactly excited about the presentation per se, he’s always liked public speaking but his classmates weren’t exactly motivating to try and present to. He’s got some kind of strange energy that’s been building in him all day, though, tingling at his fingertips and the back of his neck. Maybe it’s not the presentation he’s excited for… maybe it’s seeing him… Hux swallows thickly, staring down at his USB and pages of notes.

‘Hey so,’ Kylo says as he flops down next to Hux, all limbs and elbows and knees - as if he’d heard Hux’s thoughts. ‘I’m not doing the presentation. Good luck.’ 

Hux swallows, unable to form a coherent thought for a moment. He’s distinctly aware of the sound of blood rushing in his ears and the way his fingertips are tightening around his sheet of notes.

‘You’re… You’re what! Ren! You absolute fucking…. You…. fucking…. Shit…. Fuck…,’ Hux is truly at a loss for words. Somewhere along the line, his mouth seems to have become disconnected from his brain and both of them can only reel at Kylo’s stupidity. ‘You’re not going to do this to me, you prick. You’re not!’’ 

Kylo is silent, his face far less stormy than Hux would’ve thought after that barrage of curses, Hux manages to think through the fog of rage clouding his mind. 

‘You called me Ren,’ Kylo says quietly, after a moment. 

‘Well of course I did! It’s your fucking name isn’t it?’ He shouts back, getting angrier by the second.

‘Thank you,’ Kylo says softly and before Hux can process what’s happening, Kylo is leaning in until their lips are only a few bare inches apart. Oh, Hux realises, he wants to…

Hux realises that he also wants to. He wants to kiss Kylo Ren, for all his stupid haircuts and terrible personality and annoyingly beautiful face. 

Closing the gap is easy, it’s only when their lips meet that Hux starts to panic. Kylo feels warm against him, his lips slightly chapped and rough, and Hux is frozen - taking in the feeling with a kind of distant panic. What if he forgot to brush his teeth that morning, what if he’s no good at kissing, what if….? Luckily, Kylo takes the lead and starts to move his lips softly against Hux’s, tipping Hux’s head back. Hux loses himself in the feeling, kissing back as much as he can. 

When Kylo pulls away Hux decides that it wasn’t terrible all things considered.  

Kylo smiles as he gets up. ‘See you later.’

Hux breathes for a moment, his hand moving towards his lips of its own accord - as if pulled by some invisible magnet. His lips feel the same as always - smooth and soft thanks to a regular Chapstick routine although they tingle slightly at the touch of his fingertips - slightly sensitive now. Once again, the world feels like it’s changed, shifted around the two of them like an alternate reality. Hux wonders how he can ever go back to just ‘being’ now, now that he knows what it’s like to kiss Kylo Ren.

That was… that was…

‘Kylo you bastard!’ He shouts at Kylo’s retreating back. 

‘Armitage!’ Mr Skywalker bursts out of the classroom. ‘I don’t expect that kind of language from you! Is your presentation ready?’ 

[judefan848-blog]

the federal government funds scientific research

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