#at 30 i realized i had no gender

[hikikomoriheadphonegirl]

[triplefrustration]

i've got like. five different books i'm in the middle of reading right now LOL they all scratch different itches. im going to try to read 52 books this year which seems like a lot but half of what i read are graphic novels so it's not that bad, im already ahead of schedule. maybe i'll post little blurbs on my thoughts as i finish each (would probably be a good brain exercise). "shelving" anything i don't plan on finishing any time soon.

At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender - a memoir by a 50 y/o intersex person living in japan. it's been interesting to see cultural similarities and differences, as well as a perspective from an older trans person, and is usually what i pick up when i want something lighter. it's fun to read just hasn't sunk its claws into my brain like some other books (including books i've read recently that i hated)

Akira Vol 1 - reading through the entire series this year. hasnt grabbed me quite the same way the movie did, i think because what got me obsessed (and i mean a literal obsession) with the movie was a lot of the mood set by music and artistic choices. sup early on, but again my hang up here is just that it hasnt hooked me emotionally so far

The Dispossessed - ok SORRY. im having trouble with this one. i havent read a lot of le guin, my main engagement with her work is omelas. still very early into this one, but the writing style feels very detached and reserved compared to omelas. i assume of course the voices for each piece were developed specifically for the needs of each, which are VERY different but idk. i hope it picks up, if it doesn't i'll try earthsea and if i don't like that le guin just may not be for me:/

goodnight punpun vol 1 - grabbed this on a whim at a local bookstore today, has been on my list for a LONG time. it's great so far as expected. i generally know that the story gets really dark, and seeing the tone i understand why people get so distinctly unsettled by it. excited to keep reading:) since this one has my attention the most right now it's my book of the week

capitalist realism is there no alternative - i have like one chapter of this left LOL. im awful about reading theory but im just trying to remember how to use me noggin right so i'll worry about nonfiction later. might finish this as a commute audiobook. would shelve this but since i have so little of it left i might as well try and finish it soon

house of leaves - i was so excited to read this last year when i decided to start reading again i picked it up immediately. unfortunately i am still regrowing the brain cells necessary to follow this competently for the time being. SHELVED!

[biromantic-nerd]

John Lennon

[usagisnaps]

[theotakufiles]

At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender Manga

"At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender" is a compelling and thought-provoking documentary series that follows the life journey of Alex, an individual who embarks on a remarkable exploration of their gender identity after reaching a crucial milestone in their life. This groundbreaking docuseries delves into the deeply personal experiences, challenges, and triumphs that accompany self-discovery and acceptance.

As Alex courageously dives into introspection, they confront societal norms and expectations to unravel the complexities of their own gender identity. The series showcases how their journey impacts not only themselves but also those around them – family, friends, colleagues, and romantic partners – who must grapple with preconceived notions about gender as well.

Throughout the captivating episodes, viewers gain insight into various pivotal moments in Alex's life. From coming out to loved ones and navigating through different communities to seeking support from experts in the field of gender studies and understanding the significance of pronouns – each chapter pushes boundaries and prompts viewers to question their own understanding of gender.

This gripping series aims to challenge conventional beliefs about gender while fostering empathy for those whose identities defy traditional categorizations. Through heartwarming stories of personal growth, resilience, and realization, "At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender" offers viewers an engaging portrayal of one person's transformative journey towards self-acceptance in an ever-evolving world. Get ready for an eye-opening exploration that celebrates diversity and advocates for understanding at its core!

Please show your support for the talented manga author of 'At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender Manga' by purchasing a copy of this incredible work on gekimanga.com. By doing so, you not only contribute to the success of this brilliant artist but also help in promoting inclusive storytelling and diverse representation in the manga industry. Let us unite in celebrating creativity and kinship by getting this thought-provoking manga today at gekimanga.com!

[asexual-levia-tan]

i love the bias + the fan pairings so much because on the surface its very "oh, well, the bias just has to fall for the fan and then its happily ever after" but no! its way more fun than that!

the fan isnt in love with the bias. in fact, the fan doesnt view this world as reality, nor do they even view their bias as a human. the fun part of this pairing is the fan having to recognize the world they live in as their new reality and the people around them as people! the bias falling for the fan is just part one, the fan falling for the bias as an Actual Human Being is just as important an element

[chemicalarospec]

I don't believe in anything spiritual but if I were to believe in something it would be that my soul was made to grow up in the 2000s but something happened and my release was delayed.

[shwarmii]

i never realized Viktor was missing from Disenchanted Fashions before (or at least tumblr isnt showing him) and i am having so much fun with that bit of freedom towards his wardrobe jfc

[fizzseed]

i have 30 mins lunch break for my 7.5hr customer service shift and im spending it desperately trying to stay caught up with the 4hrs of lecture this fucking job is making me miss

[ljaesch]

Tokyopop Highlights At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender: Life Lessons From a 50-Year-Old After Two Decades of Self Discovery

Publisher Tokyopop offers a thoughtful graphic novel memoir that ponders gender, transgender issues, and the daily obstacles faced by gender minorities and members of the LGBTQIA+ community as it highlights At 30 I Realized I Had No Gender: Life Lessons From A 50-Year-Old After Two Decades of Self-Discovery. The graphic novel is available now in print and digitally across all major comics…

[hikikomoriheadphonegirl]

[obsessivevoidkitten]

That Time You Got Yeeted Into Another World, Mistaken as a God-Sent Gift, and Used as a Prize in an Arena

Yandere Bear-Man Dilf x Gender Neutral Reader

CW: Noncon, framed for a crime, language barrier, eaten out like it's groceries, biting, scent marking, musk, combat, general yandere behavior

Word Count: 765

(Speed written out of nowhere because I had the idea suddenly, not beta read so please forgive any mistakes. I hope you guys like this ficlet. Also forgive the title, in a game I was playing there was a crossover with "That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime" and I liked the vibe of the title.)

You were framed for a crime you didn't commit and in your village the punishment for that crime was immediate exile via being shoved down a steep crater in the center of which is a one-way portal to what is thought to be Hell.

What no one on your side of the portal knew was that on the other side was just another world. A world that celebrated with a great holiday anytime a human came through the portal. It was also a world populated entirely, with the exception of humans who crossed over, by human-like beast hybrids.

Driders, lion hybrids, nagas, aqrabuamelu (scorpion-men), harpies, dog people, centaurs, minotaurs, gnolls, and many other races that seemed to be part human. 

They have a connecting portal in their universe, but any who try to go into it are spat back out. The current went only in one direction.

Every few years, a human would be flung forth from the portal, a gift from the gods! But only the worthy can keep such a gift. So whenever a human comes to the realm from the watcher of the portal will ring the bells and all the warriors assemble and a grand tournament is held at the arena. Whoever wins gets to keep the human and gains enough wealth to care for them properly.

Things are no different when you arrive, you are immediately ushered away, examined, and pampered like a prize doll with no agency. Despite your objections. It seems like only the keeper of the portal has any rudimentary undestanding of your language, not that it helped you. He didn't explain much and his speech wasn't that great. Something about... a big game?

You were naturally frightened beyond all reason, seeing all these beast-men, but it didn't seem like you were being harmed. It really wasn't what you thought hell was going to be like. 

On the day of the big tournament, you were dressed in the finest silks, given a tiny crown of silver, and taken to the best seat in the arena. One where everyone could see you. A cushioned throne was provided for you to sit upon. You figured that this must be a ceremony to welcome people from the portal.

You watched as all the combatants sparred. At first you were horrified, but it became evident that people could yield and death was, almost always, avoided. There were combatants of every variety. 

Even from the start the best seemed to be a naga woman named Eeris and a bear-man named Brakwen. As they advanced through the fights they both finally made it to the finals where they'd clash. Eeris favored twin daggers and fangs while Brakwen used claws and brute strength. He had a sword but had not resorted to using it. 

It was a mighty battle but Brakwen the bear-man managed to win. You still did not yet realize you were the prize. Not until you were escorted down to him and were carried bridal style out of the arena with the crowd cheering. Brakwen had won the god's favor!

From close up he looked even more imposing. He seemed to be in his late 30s to early 40s. He mostly looked like a hairy man from far away though up close his massive size, sharp teeth, claws, thick fur covering his arms and quite frankly adorable bear ears, gave him away. He was rugged but admittedly rather handsome. You knew there was nothing you could do so you let him carry you away. 

Despite the language barrier, Brakwen did his best to please his god-given prize. He could tell you feared him. Especially since you tried to run off a few times. But Brakwen didn't get angry. You never even managed to get past the door. Even if you did there were two gates outside the house. You were far too valuable to let wander off. 

Eventually when you had stopped running off, and when his rut demanded he wait no longer, he began acting a bot more aggressove and sexual towards you. 

Though you tried to stop him it ended with him stretching out your hole with his powerful tongue, lubing you up with his copious amounts of drool, and sliding into you with his massive musky cock.

That's what your life was now. Being treated like a fragile precious gem most of the time and then for one week out of every month you were fucked full of hot bear cum in every possible position, bitten possessively, and scent marked by being forced to wear his oversized clothing. 

[terfshadow]

When I went on HRT, I underwent a single phone interview with GenderGP to assess me. I told them I wasn't even sure what I identified as, as this was when I was starting to have my gender dysphoria ease as I realized being a woman wasn't this mark of the beast or whatever. after a 30 minute phone call, I was advised testogel. After paying, I got my testogel in two weeks. I got it delivered, and never had to see anyone face to face, or do more than 30 minutes of talking where I was pretty open about being confused about my gender.

I was told that testosterone would improve my energy, after I was open in my application about having disorders that give me chronic fatigue. I was told it would help me lose weight, very alluring as an overweight woman. I was told I would gain muscle. Asked if baldness ran in my family on the men side, I said yes, and the person I was talking with hand waved it and said I wouldn't have to worry.

Never once was I told that it'd affect my fertility. Never once was I told I would start losing hair. I was not told that I would be going through menopause as a fresh adult. I was not told about vaginal atrophy. I was not told about the liver problems, the bone problems, anything. They never assessed whether I could give full consent (I am autistic, disabled, and need caretaking to function day to day)

TRAs will say it's still my fault, that I was an adult and should have known better. I was told I was transgender since I was an ACTUAL CHILD. I was socially transitioned before I even hit puberty. When you spend over a decade like that, of course you're going to go into that as an adult.

AND TRAs will say that getting hormones is not easy. It is a fucking lie. If you have money, you can get hormones. You do not need gender dysphoria, you do not need an actual evaluation. You give them money, and they will tell you it is a miracle drug that will cure what your problems are.

[bitchface24-7]

THE SEDUCTIVE PROFESSOR VIKTOR PT2

synopsis: after completing “The Science Behind Magic: HXT101” with straight As your darling Professor Viktor decides to reward you. After all, you're no longer his student... So you two are no longer breaking any rules. And he can have you in Any. Way. He. Wants.

warnings: age gap (viktor’s gotta be anywhere in his 30s-40s to be a professor, reader is in their 20s (early to late I don’t really care) ), technically still a power imbalance, switch leaning dom!viktor, I tried my best to make this gender-neutral, this isn’t gonna be a full on story, just bullet points I come up with, Grammarly as my beta

genre: m/f or m/m

p.s. Please save me from this man, why is he invading my every thought and dream? He's making me realize things about myself.

PART 1

Being in higher education is a total pain in the ass.

Having Viktor as your professor made it a million times easier.

Especially since you finished his class as the top student. The look on Viktors face when the charts were released still gives you butterflies to this day.

You're officially a graduate of your STEM program! And with how amazing your grades are, and how many spectacular references you got; you were able to become Viktor’s TA. Allowing for Jayce to become the Lab Professor of “The Science Behind Magic: HXT101” (they still alternate roles. They hate being confined to one aspect of teaching.)

Especially since you're now secretly dating the most sought-after professor the academy has ever had.

You know it’s still frowned upon, a TA dating their superior, but at least it’s not as bad as a student fucking their professor. You're guilty on both counts.

You only have a scheduled class twice a week. Once on Tuesdays in the morning, and once on Thursdays in the afternoon. The rest of the week you're free to do whatever (and whomever) you please. It's mostly built this way so you can have enough time to grade almost a hundred assignments and still have time to relax.

You two have squeezed that schedule dry.

You've had sex in the classroom, in your shared office, in the library, in each others apartments.

You're fucking like rabbits.

You'll never forget when you were honestly, truly, just trying to grade some papers with Viktor in the library and all of a sudden you're getting fondled underneath the table and you're covering your mouth trying not to get caught.

You were rewarded that night with how well you behaved. You made sure you two didn't get caught. How sweet.

But there have been times when you've been bratty; desperately craving Viktor's love and attention.

And you got it, in the form of you getting your throat fucked and ass smacked with Viktors cane. He didn't stop until you had tears streaming down your face and your ass was a beautiful mixture of red, purple, and blue.

(you were too stubborn to use your safe word)

The looks of concern your students shot you as Viktor subtly yet smugly drank his sweetened coffee made your blood boil in both anger and lust.

You could barely sit or move due to the spanking, and you could barely talk due to the pounding your throat received. Making it so Viktor taught the class and you sat there pretty; and incredibly uncomfortable.

Some students shot you pointed looks but you pretended they weren't there.

But… there has been instances where YOU were the dominant one.

Where you sucked his cock under his desk, not caring if colleagues came in to chat. Even if it was the dean.

Where you rode him into the mattress, painting his pretty neck and chest with a smattering of hickies.

Where you sat on his face until your body gave out due to how skilled he is with his fingers and tongue.

You're not sure you've ever orgasmed this much before in your life, but you’re not complaining!

Aside from the mind-blowing sex… dating Viktor is like a dream come true.

He’s caring, sweet, kind, and thoughtful. He's still snarky and sassy with a dry dirty humour but… he's perfect.

And you wouldn't change a damn thing about him.

Even when you two are cuddled up in bed late at night and you're having a deep conversation, and Viktor’s insecurities peek through, you shut that shit down immediately.

You're in awe over the fact Viktor's never been in a proper relationship before.

You make a promise to yourself after learning that. You'll be Viktor's first and last relationship.

Till death do you part baby! You wonder which ring will look best on your ring finger.

(but that's a bit farther into the future. Enjoy your relationship as it is now with its sweetness and crazy freak nasty sex)

[straightouttherosebush]

♡Licking Love off of Knives♡

Characters: Leona Kingscholar, Vil Schoenheit, Jamil Viper, Idia Shroud

Synopsis: These guys seem likely to degrade their partner, but how would they do it?

Content Warning: AFAB/Female! Reader, "Queen" used as gender neutral, NSFW themes (Degradation (verbal, sexual, physical), rough sex, vaginal sex, foot play (not necessarily fetish? Like, Vil uses kissing his boots to humiliate reader, idk you decide), bondage (shibari pretty much), oral (male anatomy), I must add that all characters are written to be 18 or over and that all of the actions happening here are consensual and any BDSM should be practiced with someone you 100% trust and have set boundaries with :D)

♡ Leona seems like the most likely to degrade his partner. Gloved fingers in your mouth or around your neck, squeezing, his mostly clothed body flush against your naked one. Bullying his cock into you while growling in your ear that you're a stupid slut good for nothing but taking his dick, if even that. Don't try to pull away because you're scared of the pain, either. You're fucking lucky, you should be grateful to be hooking up with a prince, of all things. He'll hold you in place and you'll be able to feel his long nails through his gloves as he tries to work himself inside your tight hole. Where the fuck do you think you're going, you pathetic whore? You wanted this. You had the audacity to tease him, after all. Little human cunt unable to handle beastman cock, crying like a little bitch and grunting from the pain of him stretching you out. He thought you were tougher than that! Where is that spunk? All growl and no bite, herbivore?

♡ You aren't getting what you want until Vil's whims are satisfied. This was your first time with him, but he realized that with every insult, you'd get a little... worked up. At least, as far as he could tell. Why else do you flush when he's harsh with you during dance practice? Why else do you clench your legs together as he dissects everything you did wrong and bluntly relays it to you? His mean words are divine, not even vulgar, and mixed with his voice? You are simply obliged to obey. He had his chin tucked into his collar as he looked down on you. His elegant legs were crossed and his eyes glared daggers into yours. Is it so hard to do? Did he expect too much of you? He must have if you are so incompetent as to not know how to properly pose. All he wants you to do is nuzzle up to the foot of his thigh-high boot and kiss it. That's all. He just wants you to worship him and keep a memento of your grovelling, but if you can't do that, maybe you don't deserve his long fingers inside you, hitting that spot inside of you just right as they curl. The moment you lay a kiss onto the toe cap and start kissing your way up the latex to his thigh, he starts smirking. His eyes, sharp as ever, coldly taking in your pathetic visage. As you make your way up to his thigh, your eyes plead with him as you let out a hushed "please, my Queen." He looks at you with squinted eyes and a wry smile, and scoffs. He didn't get that on camera, so let's try that again. For the millionth time. He doesn't think he stuttered, either. Get back down there.

♡ You've been tied up in Jamil's room for 30 minutes now. Masterfully tied red ropes adorned your body as you lay on his bed, legs forced open and arms tied behind your back. He was trying to work, and you were all over him constantly. And since you can't manage yourself around him, this is your punishment. Tut, tut, it's only been thirty minutes. Can't handle that much? Too bad. He still had studying to do and other duties to attend to even after that, so you had better get a grip on yourself quick, lest you be stuck there until Jamil turns in for the night. While he is able to remain focused, he will rarely glance over and flash a conceited smirk at you. Hearing you whimper and beg every so often was music to his ears, but he can't have that impeding him either. Your incessant whining is also now becoming a distraction. He suggests you cease it before he gags you. And that he does. With your own wet panties. Scarlet, just for him. Can you taste yourself? See how desperate and stupid you are for him? How absolutely cockdrunk you are and he hasn't even let you have it in weeks? So weak willed... and only for him, right? Come on, admit it. This is the only time he wants you to open your whore mouth. Oh wait! You can't! Oh well. But then he hears a few knocks on his door. Thankfully, he locked it, and you're so lucky he did. What's that? Kalim is asking for Jamil to start on dinner and wants you to dine with them? Ugh, fine. He supposes he can untie you and let you partake in the privilege of dining with the rest of the dorm at his side. But he does not forget, nor does he easily forgive.

Idia isn't typically the meanest, usually he's too meek to be so cruel. Especially not to his doting partner, may the Seven forbid it. However, right now? He's in a game lobby talking about your lackluster "under-the-desk" support. Ever since he caught onto you liking his more arrogant, mean side, he has been using it like crazy. The more he insults the use of your teeth, the more sopping wet you become. You cost his team a game because he was carrying and had to stop you from biting down on him. Way to go, jackass. You better not be touching yourself either, you don't deserve that. The fact that you can hardly see his face from under the desk works wonders for his confidence. He could never say these things to your face. Sure, to any of the normies outside, he probably could. He'd backtrack, but he could still say it at first. But when he's locked in, he's locked the fuck IN. The tips of his hair were still flickering pink, but his voice sounded rougher and a bit angrier than usual. Usually, loser virgin Idia would be shooting blanks by now. God can't you do your job right? You're not even playing, you have one job, and He's nowhere close to finishing. He doesn't care if your jaw hurts, he can't just reach down there, grab your hair, and fuck your face in the middle of a match. Can't. Love to, but can't.

Hello once again!!! I've had these headcanons for a bit so I worked them into little scenarios and I hope you guys enjoyed them! I put actual research into this chapter because as much as I am a degradee, I kinda felt like I was missing something. :>

I really don't know what came over me while writing Vil's part, I blacked tf OUT. I was thinking about the vampire Vil design while writing it because great GOOGLY MOOGLY, y'know?

I MIGHT also do a post on the characters I think would praise/worship their partners. Idk, heavy might.

Bye bye little shrimpies! ROSEY ♡

♡MASTERLIST HERE♡

Ⓒ Written by Rosey, please do not copy/repost/translate.♡

[elierlick]

There's a very cute manga about coming out as nonbinary in the 1990s by a 50-year-old writer Shou Arai, At 30, I Realized I Had No Gender: Life Lessons From a 50-Year-Old After Two Decades of Self-Discovery. You can order it here.