#ashes of memory more like ashes of gays

[butterflies-and-mirrors]

I still find it very funny that in the ashes of memory storyline when Alice, Orpheus and Frederick were in the racecourse and Frederick pulled out a gun on them Orpheus told Alice that he must be experienced because he has bruises on his palms but the thing is. Frederick was wearing gloves at all times whenever he left his room because of his condition so like. How did Orpheus know he had bruises on his palms. Is there something you want to share with the class Mr. Novelist?

[carewyncromwell]

[Marvel AU] Jacob Cromwell/Duncan Ashe Moodboard

featuring Jacob as Steve Rogers “Captain America”  and Duncan as Bucky Barnes “the Winter Soldier”

“...Jacob...?”

“You know me now? Or do you?”

“...Your mother’s name was Lane. Your sister was Carewyn. You called her ‘Pip.’ ...You never shut up about her -- how much you missed her, how much you’d make her proud. You wrote her a letter every morning at eight, no matter where you were on the front -- even in a pitch-black tank with nothing but my lighter to help you see. ...You...loved her more than anyone...”

“Nice facts. Did you collect those from hacking security cameras, or interrogating other targets?”

“Oh, for fu -- Jacob, it’s me! I know the Soldier’s a good actor, and I’m pretty damn sure I know what S.H.I.E.L.D.’s told you about me. Master of disguise -- able to blend in like a chameleon, fluent in seven languages -- the ultimate assassin? ...That was me, but -- it wasn’t. It wasn’t really me. But right now, I...right now, this is me, Jacob. ...Look in my eyes. You know it’s me.”

“...If it is really you...then tell me why you saved me, from the river.”

“Wha -- oh, come on! I -- you know why! You have to know why. How could you not, when you let me just keep hitting you, over and over again -- when you must’ve known I wouldn’t actually be able to go through with it -- ?”

“I didn’t know that. You’re a genetically-enhanced assassin, Ashe -- I knew full well you could kill me, if you tried. ...I just knew I wouldn’t be able to hurt you. No matter what you’ve done, no matter what orders I was given -- no matter what you might do to me...I would never be able to hurt you, Ashe.”

“Jacob...”

“Ashe...I lost you once. I’m not going to lose you again.”

“...Jacob... ...You goddamn idiot...it’s all the same, for me.”

[babysukiii]

regina’s puppy (4)

// regina has a soft spot for you, but when she refuses to accept why, someone else might swoop in and take your attention away from her. //

warnings: soft!regina, fluff, pining, LOTS of pining, regina is falling for the reader hard, reader is a gay mess, regina is a lesbian who’s terrible at emotions. (don’t get too used to fluffy chapters this is the calm before the storm…)

(this part 4 of the series, read part 3 here)

you end up replaying gretchen’s party in your head over the weekend. you can’t seem to stop thinking about the look in regina’s eyes when she saw you and dani talking. it was the angriest you’ve ever seen her, and then afterwards she just pretended as if it never occurred. yet it was engraved into your brain like a branded memory; permanently there for you to think about at night.

you couldn’t figure out why regina was so enthralled by you… if you could call it that. as you started to become more aware of what dani said on friday night, how you were regina’s “puppy”… it caused you to overthink a few things. this entire time you thought regina was getting closer to you all of a sudden because she enjoyed your company. now you feared it was because she just wanted some new pet to play with.

you and regina had developed a routine on the nights you couldn’t convince your parents to allow you to stay the night. she’d call you, and you’d talk for hours; sometimes till you fell asleep. though saturday night you used a flimsy excuse of being at your grandmas house; she new it was a lie. then on sunday, you barely texted her at all. she knew something was up right away, and she wasn’t going to tolerate it.

as soon as you walked out of your house to catch the bus on monday, regina’s jeep was parked on the side of the street. your heart immediately began to flutter as it usually does whenever you see the blonde. she rolls down her window, and you catch a glimpse of how gorgeous she looks. your legs have a mind of their own as you begin to walk up to her car, furrowing your brows. “don’t you usually pick up gretchen on mondays?” you question, and she shrugs, flashing you that colgate smile that makes your knees week. “she can take the bus. get in, loser.” she taunts you.

you can’t help but sheepishly smile as you get into her passenger side. “she’s gonna freak out. she was texting the group chat all weekend about how her parents found puke in her grandmas ashes.” you giggle, and regina lets out this strained laugh that isn’t her usual one. “yeah, i tried calling you but you were busy.” she grumbles, and you tense up slightly. “and you were dodging my texts. what gives?” she asks, as she begins to drive. she doesn’t turn on music like she usually does, only showing you how serious she is.

“i just couldn’t stop thinking about what happened on friday.” you start cautiously, and she frowns, an agitated expression etching itself onto her features. “seriously? that fucking bitch deserved a slap, y/n.” she defends herself, and you flash her a look. “i’m not talking about the slap… i mean, i’m actually surprised you didn’t do worse.” you joke softly, trying to lighten the heavy tension in the air. regina lets out this tiny exhale; if it weren’t so quiet in the car you may not have heard it. that’s when you take in how wrought up she seems, as if she’s been stressing over something.

surely she wasn’t stressing over you avoiding her for two days… right?

“then what is it? why are you being weird?” she questions demandingly, sounding genuinely upset. “because i can’t stop thinking about what dani said!” you huff out, sounding the most frustrated she’s ever heard. upon seeing your exasperated demeanor, she calms down slightly. realizing something was actually wrong. “y/n, everything that loser said was bullshit—“ she starts, but you cut her off, “she was right though! i am such a different person now and it’s only been a month.” you counterpoint, causing her to bite her tongue.

regina hates to be interrupted, but she really enjoys you and whatever it is that’s budding between the two of you. she doesn’t want to lose it because some stupid jock said something at a lame party she only went to in order to save face. “and you don’t like who you are? you don’t enjoy the way we’ve been hanging out all the time?” regina questions, you shake your head. “i love spending time with you… but dani called me your puppy, gina. is that seriously what people think of me now? is that what you think of me?” you ask persistently.

the blonde shakes her head rapidly in disagreement. “i don’t think of you as my puppy… just because you have the qualities of one, doesn’t mean i consider you one.” she tells you, and you frown. “how do i have the qualities of a puppy?” you can’t help but ask, and she shrugs. “loyal, obedient, always happy to see me.” she flashes you that infamous smile, and you roll your eyes in response. “y/n, dani is just jealous because you’re hanging out with me and not her. she only said that to get under your skin, and clearly it worked.” she states, and your silence causes her to reach for your hand.

her touch sends shockwaves throughout your body. “don’t be angry at me over some comment a dumb jock made because you wouldn’t go into a basement with her.” she practically pleads, and you know it’s the closest thing you’ll get to any sort of comfort from regina george. “besides, don’t you like hanging out with me?” she questions, and you throw her a look that says “are you serious”. “of course i like hanging out with you, you’re like my favorite person.” you admit, and regina feels something tugging on the heartstrings she didn’t even realize she had.

“then stop listening to what anyone else says.” this sounds more like a command, so you find yourself nodding dumbly. your brain always goes fuzzy whenever she tells you to do something, and the only coherent thought is to do whatever regina says. god, maybe dani was right, you are regina’s puppy.

you walk into school with the blonde by your side. you’ve adjusted to the gawking students that ogle regina as she walks by. you really don’t blame them; ever since freshman year you’ve been one of those people who gaze at her in admiration. until now. regina’s strange interest in you hasn’t gone unnoticed by anyone else, and you’re now beginning to adjust to all the attention.

“please never make me take the bus again!” gretchen exclaims as she storms up to the both of you, and regina rolls her eyes. “i had to pick up y/n today. you’ll survive.” the blonde sounds unamused, causing gretchen to huff in response. “i already said i’m sorry, even though it’s totally not my fault i have a totally hot basement that makes people horny.” she says, and regina narrows her eyes at her friend. “we discussed this already. i’m going to be taking y/n to school from now on.” her tone is up for no disagreements, and you shake your head in protest. “it’s okay, gina. i don’t mind taking the bus—“ you start, but she cuts you off.

“i like picking you up. hush.” she shushes you quickly, and you try to ignore the way the back of your neck heats up. gretchen pouts, but doesn’t argue any further. as the three of you approach regina’s locker, karen bounces up to you guys. “did you guys here about the new girl who’s transferring here tomorrow?” she asks curiously, and regina quirks a brow in clear interest. “a new girl? why wasn’t i informed about this?” she questions, and karen shrugs. “i heard it from arnold who says he heard it from elizabeth g.” she explains, and the blonde presses her lips together tightly.

“a new student nobody bothered to tell me about… huh.” she says as she thinks about it for a moment. “she better be more interesting than the last new student we had. jeanette renolds is such a bore.” the blonde adds simply, and that’s that. the topic of the “new student” doesn’t come up again. at least not in front of you.

during lunch gretchen begins to talk about how close homecoming is, regardless of it being 3 months away. “you’re running for homecoming queen again, right regina?” gretchen asks, and regina glowers. “of course i am. why wouldn’t i?” she responds with a question, before looking at you. “are you going to vote for me to be homecoming queen?” she asks, her voice flirty and sweet. your cheeks flush under her gaze, “of course, i voted for you last year too, gina.” you confess, and this elicits a large smile from your favorite blonde.

“everyone voted for regina last year, and this year it’s not gonna change. i don’t even think you need a campaign manager this time either.” gretchen says, and regina rolls her eyes. “i am my own campaign manager, idiot. but i have y/n to help me with more stuff this year, like what color scheme i should go with.” she says suggestively, as her gaze flickers over to you. your eyes widen in slight panic, “what?? i can’t pick your color scheme! i’m terrible at picking out stuff. i mean, you chose my entire wardrobe.” you remind her, and she shrugs.

“don’t care. your opinion is the only one that matters to me, so we’ll start looking at dresses next week. for you too.” her tone is left for no debates, and you don’t really pay attention to anything past “your opinion is the only one that matters to me”. the heat rises to your neck and face, and regina’s grin deepens. “are we still hanging out after school, or are you bailing on me today again?” regina pointedly asks you, and you nod eagerly. “we can try that new pretzel place—“ regina cuts you off, “you’re so cute, i can’t do too many carbs but i’ll get you pretzels on the way to where i’m taking you.” she declares, and your eyebrows perk up.

before you can question the blonde the bell rings, “i’m not doing anything after school—“ gretchen tries to say but regina cuts her off. “i didn’t ask, and you weren’t invited.” she hisses, and gretchen huffs. nobody dares question why regina is so adamant on spending time with you; especially alone time. honestly, you’re a bit scared to ask her as well. not because you think she’ll be mean to you, regina is never mean to you, no, you’re just afraid you may mess up whatever this is.

you’re ashamed to admit regina has become the center of your universe. she takes up all the spaces in your brain, and you can’t even go an hour without thinking about her. you and regina end up hanging out after school as promised. you end up sitting in the passenger seat of her car, a medium sized lemonade in your hand along with your mini pretzel bites. regina steals glances at you every now and then; you contentedly hum along to the song that’s playing as you curiously gaze out the window.

the only thought that keeps circling her mind is how much she likes this. just being around you.

“are we going on a hike?” you ask your hundredth question, and regina groans. “no, i hate walking.” she reminds you, and you have this adorable expression on your face as you think about other possibilities. the further from town you get, the further your mind wanders. “the beach?” you ask, and she shakes her head. “nope; i hate getting sand in my shoes and car.” she deadpans, and you go quiet for another few seconds. “we’ve been driving for almost forty minutes… what time are we coming back?” you inquire, and regina rolls her eyes, feigning annoyance.

“you already wanna leave me?” she responds with a question of her own, and you shake your head rapidly. “no! i love hanging out with you, i just gotta text my mom and let her know before we end up somewhere with no service.” you explain yourself, and regina pretends as if she’s thinking about it for a moment. “just tell your mom you’re gonna spend the night at mine.” she orders, and you flash her a look, “gina, i can’t spend the night on a monday.” you remind her, causing her to huff.

“fine, tell her i’ll have you home by ten-thirty.” she mutters begrudgingly, and you smile in satisfaction. you send the text to your mom right as regina turns onto another highway to leave town. “okay, now i’m really curious! please tell me where we’re going.” you sound more excited than before, and the eagerness in your voice tugs on the blonde’s heartstrings. “it’s just a little place i like to go when things are too much. todays like the first pretty day we’ve had in awhile, and i wanted to take you.” she reveals, causing something inside of you to melt.

“y-you wanna take me to your spot?” you sound genuinely stunned, and regina snorts. “duh, who else would i wanna bring there? gretchen talks too much, karen doesn’t know what’s going on half the time, and everyone else only hangs out with me because i’m “regina george”… it’s only natural for me to take my special girl to my special place.” she retorts easily, causing the blood to rise to your face. regina smirks as she notes how flushed your cheeks are; she doesn’t think she’ll ever get tired of the affect she has on you.

“we’re almost there; finish your pretzels.” she commands, and you don’t have to be told twice.

the sun is nearly setting by the time you both pull into a secluded area off a random road in the middle of nowhere. you can’t help but wonder how regina knows about this place; how long she was driving to find it one day. as she drives further into a green grassy area full of trees, with beams of sunlight peaking through the gaps in the tree lines. your eyes widen as she drives further, only going deeper into the beautiful woods.

you roll down your windows excitedly, “oh my gosh this place is so pretty!” you squeal tempestuously. regina tries not look at you in fear she may swerve and ram into a tree, but your sudden uncontrolled behavior causes her to smile widely. if anyone she knew were to see it, they would hell froze over. she’s glad you aren’t paying any attention to her, because you would’ve seen the unusually soft expression on her face. you turn to look at her, catching her grinning from ear to ear, “we haven’t even gotten to the really cool part.” she tells you, and your eyes enlarge as they gaze into her.

“cooler than a literal forest out of a picture book!?” you ask and she chuckles, “you’re way too easy to impress. i’m starting to think i could park behind the 7/11 with you for an hour and you’d have fun.” she murmurs, and you shrug as you look back out the window. “as long as it’s with you.” you say this so easily, and it causes her smile to fall. her expression morphs into a baffled one, and she can’t stop herself from wondering why... why do you enjoy being around her so much?

regina makes a slight turn, and you let out this breathless gasp as your eyes land on a creek with a waterfall. it isn’t big, but it’s beautiful. “oh my god… gina! this is so beautiful!” you shriek erratically and you unbuckle your seatbelt as you the car comes to a full stop. you run out, and her eyes widen, “hey! i said i hate walking!” she hisses, trying to sound angry but she can’t even recognize herself.

if the girls heard me right now, they’d never respect me again.

“come on, gina!!” you order her, and regina— the girl who never takes orders from anyone— sighs as she turns the car off and gets out. “look at how clear the water is!” your enthusiasm causes regina to approach you, and act as if she hasn’t already seen this place a hundred times before you. it looks different when you’re here… regina can’t seem to place why. she isn’t sure if she’ll ever enjoy coming here without you again, and she doesn’t care. all she can do is stare at how the light of the sunset reflects off your big, wondrous eyes.

“if i would’ve known you liked this place so much, i would’ve brought you here awhile ago. i just never thought of bringing anyone till now.” she admits softly, and your smile deepens, which is something she didn’t even think was possible. “you haven’t bright anyone else here?” you ask timidly, and she nods earnestly. “just you.”

her confession causes you to wrap your arms around her, hugging her abruptly. her eyes widen a bit; she’s never been the hugging type… yet as your delicate grasp tightens around her lovingly, in a way she’s never felt, she can’t help the way her stomach flutters pathetically. she hugs you back, and can feel you practically melt into her. you’re so happy, and it hits her that you’re happy because of her. she’s made people cry, yell, curse, and run in the opposite direction… but she’s never made anyone feel happy.

the fleeting thought alone terrifies her like nothing else ever has. regina george is falling in love with you, and she isn’t sure how to stop it.

a/n: please don’t hate me but tumblr wasn’t letting me tag some of your accounts 😭💔

taglist: @xvyzxx @spideyznss @whateveryouwantsee11 @alwaysgoodnight @chaoticcoffeequeen @mcu-junkie @lottienatswife @vanessashands @natashas-whore @southelroys @dandelions4us @ylenabelxva @probs-reading-fanfics @dont-emily-me @luz-enjoyer @flocon-neigeux @jjiwoo06 @aminetil @pyro-les @tyler-06 @justlovemaths @teenybean @emskies @tulipatheticee @marvelwomenarehot0 @syddie-reads @slaysksmska @cas-is-weird-ig @scarlettbitchx @pianogirl2121 @puppy-danvers2016 @messsor @dmenby3100 @that-one-little-soybean

[p-taryn-dactyl]

after midnight

a/n: dw i still am working on all my wips but i just wanted to show my love for the movie that ruled my childhood! also if there's a certain fairy tale and character you would like me to do i would love to do more of something like this! this is the first part, but the others have been written already, lemme know if y'all would like me to continue posting for this word count: 2.5k warning(s): the evil stepmother is NOT cunty in this guys (rip cate blanchett); the step sisters are definitely not girls girls; everyone is gay; if you know the story you know; but im also going to add aspects from one of the non-disney versions; mentions of blood (small but at the beginning); not an exact retelling, more like cinderella is a blueprint? prompt: you never thought that you would go from cleaning fireplaces and singing to mice to dancing in the royal palace in a magical disguise, meeting the love of your life. or, a cinderella story <3

The needle pricked your finger, sending droplets of blood spilling onto the fine fabric. You watched as the red seeped into the green, mesmerized by how the blood ran quick. How you wished you could be as free, as quick as you ran. But your father built this house, his hopes and dreams were buried deep into the foundations, no matter how much your step-mother tried to erase his memory. She loved his money but cringed at his legacy.

"Y/N? Gods, where is that wretched girl?" Your stepmother's voice echoed up the stairs to the attic where you resided. Quickly, you folded the cloth over, hiding the spot of blood staining the rich emerald fabric. You were mending an evening gown of your stepmother, one she had snagged on a splinter of wood while evading your requests of new fabrics. Your clothes were quickly becoming patchwork quilts and even though you rarely left your attic space, you were desperate to sew a dress that you could feel proud of. Your door burst open, revealing Valentina, the woman who's presence seemed to make your room grow colder. Her eyes narrowed in on the dress in your lap and she scoffed, hand clutching the handle of the attic door tightly, as if speaking to you was a burden.

"Are you still working on that? Whatever, the fireplace needs tending to," She spun around to go back downstairs, obviously signaling you to follow, "Oh, and be mindful, the dressmaker is here, don't get soot on any of her fabrics."

Valentina's tone was haughty, as if even when she couldn't see you, she spoke looking down upon you. You merely nodded, gently folding the dress on your bed and following your step-mother down the stairs. Making sure to keep your head down, you passed Valentina, heading towards the main fire place, where burnt logs sat and ash blanketed the stone like snow. You internally sighed, knowing how this task would end. Grabbing a rag, you sat on your knees as you started gathering the loose ash and kindling, mindful of the sparks that still lingered. The voices of Valentina's daughters wafted into the room like a burnt goose pie, making your stomach uneasy as you braced yourself for the comments they would surely make. Thankfully, you heard the voice of Shuri, the acclaimed dressmaker, mingling with theirs, gently shutting down their absurd ideas. While your curiousity spun around in your mind, furiously wondering why your step-mother had called on Shuri, someone who only made dresses for the most extravagant of occasions. She also had extravagant prices, prices you weren't sure how your step-mother would repay.

"We can do measurments in here, ignore Y/N, she'll be doing her chores." Valentina absentmindedly waved in your direction, sitting on the stool farthest from you. Shuri nodded in hello, giving you a small smile which you returned. The basket she carried was full of fabric samples and measuring strands, grabbing your attention with the expensive items she so leisurley held. As your step-sisters argued, Shuri gave you her attention, her question making you pause as you cleaned the fireplace.

"Are you also going to the ball, Y/N? I'm sure I have the creativity to quickly sketch a fourth dress." Shuri joked, not noticing how your hands shook as you continued your task. There was a ball? And your stepmother was commisioning dresses for herself and her daughters in front of you, flaunting the knowledge you didn't have. While you could care less about a ball, you were bothered by how little you knew of the outside world, of the town you loved so much. Something clicked in your mind as you thought, lifting your head to turn and begin to ask your stepmother a question but her voice cut through the air.

"Unless Y/N somehow cleans the entire house top-to-bottom until it shines and sorts our mixed grain into like piles in time for the royal ball, I don't think she'll be needing your services, Miss Adanna. Besides, the queen is hosting this ball so her daughter may find a spouse, what use would she have of a serving girl?"

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"This isn't a request! You must marry!" Evanora's stern voice echoed through the throne room, practically rattling the armour of her guards. She glared at her daughter who stood before her, hair down and wild from horseback. Agatha stared back, arms crossed and head held defiantly.

"For what reason? The kingdom is prospering, the people are happy and for the most part well fed, and we've no news of our enemies to the south! Why must I marry, Mother?" At the purple wisps gathering at her fingertips, Agatha anticipated her mother's response. The queen bunched her hands into fists, her jaw clenched as she spoke.

"You know the reason, daughter. Your...studies have put you in a very precarious position and the curse will solidify on your next birthday. Plus, it won't hurt to erase the image people have of you, with your escapades and trysts that bring embarassment into my court."

Agatha merely scoffed, uncrossing her arms as she held them out incrediously.

"If you've forgotten, Mother, my birthday is at the end of this month. And the curse you speak of can only be broken by unconditional love, something you wouldn't know about." Agatha spit out her words like venom, hopeful they would affect her mother in any way. But the Queen merely watched her daughter with cold eyes, waving her messanger up to the throne. The man gave a crooked bow to Agatha as he passed her, scroll in hand. Evanora took the scroll with a nod, dismissing the man. He scurried out of the large room, footfalls echoing in the silence. The Queen waved the announcement in the air, almost tauntingly, before she opened and began reading out loud.

"The Crown formally invites you to partake in the debutante ball for Crown Princess and Heir Agatha of House Harkness. Our home will be open for three nights as our beloved Princess searches for a partner to strengthen the bonds of our kingdom."

The Queen put down the scroll, letting it fall to the ground as she smirked at her daughter.

"You'll have three nights to find this unconditional love or the consequences you'll face will doom the lives of everyone you hold dear."

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The thought of leaving the house, if only for a few nights, ate away at your mind, distracting you from your chores. Shuri had long left, your stepmother and stepsisters measurements and requests for last minute additions scribbled on a notepad you were sure she wanted to burn. But before she left, she grabbed a package from her carriage, giving it you once Valentina and her daughters had already gone inside. Inside, you found fabric, soft and beautiful. The shimmering pink shade reminded you of your mother and how she decorated the house before she died.

"I'm sorry it's not much but I've seen your work Y/N, if they won't have me make you a dress, I believe you can bring your own dream to life." Shuri clasped your hands in hers in a goodbye, her kindness overwhelming you, bringing tears to your eyes. However, at the screams of your stepsisters for tea, your bubble was burst and you made your way inside, careful to keep the package out of Valentina's sight, hiding it under a loose floorboard in the kitchen before you started the afternoon tea. Anya, the eldest of the two stepsisters, practiced her dancing, stumbling into the couches and lounge chairs as she held a candlestick in place of the Crown Princess. Damille, the stepsister close to you in age by a few months, scoffed at her sister and mockingly danced, starting a fight between the two sisters. You kept your laughter to yourself, remembering the sting of Valentina's hand when you reacted to her daughters antics the first week after your father's passing. While you waited for the water to boil, you prepared the tea leaves, grabbing a lemon to slice and squeezing the tart juice over the dry leaves. Your mind wandered once again to the idea of going to a ball. A royal ball. While you had never truly seen the royal family, you recalled the portrait of the heir you had once seen in the library of your town. You felt heat rise to your face as you recalled the childlike crush you had on the Crown Princess, shaking your head as you pouring the now boiling water into three teacups, careful to avoid splashing the water onto your skin. Once the liquid turned into a pale yellow-green shade, you strained out the leaves and prepared a tray with the cups, a bowl of sugar cubes, and some milk for Damille, who prefered her tea tart with no sugar. You walked into the sitting room, setting the tea down in front of your stepmother. While you prepared it the way she enjoyed, you attempted to ask her a question.

"Stepmother, may I accompany you to the Royal Ball? It would cost you no expense, I can make my own dress-"

Valentina's laugh cut you off.

"With the scraps you have? I will not be seen in public with someone is a patchwork excuse for a dress, at a royal ball no less. Besides you have chores." Even though she waved her hand through the air, indicating the conversation was over, you continued, feeling slightly desperate at a chance to taste freedom.

"I can get the chores done in time, the house is never truly dirty, and I could wear one of my mother's old-"

It was Valentina's cold stare that stopped you from continuing. Something clicked in her eyes and she brought up her tea to take a sip, reveling in your tense body language. Slowly she set her tea back onto the china plate, the soft clink the only noise as you and her daughters awaited her answer.

"If you can create a dress, a new dress, that isn't embarassing for my family and if you can complete the chore of mucking the stables before the first night of the ball, you may accompany us. But," she held a finger almost accusingly in your face, "You will not speak to anyone of any status while there."

There was something in her tone, something you couldn't quite place but her agreement overshadowed any caution you could've had. You practically danced out of the room, patterns for your dress spinning in your mind.

You didn't notice the look your step-mother shared with her daughters as you left, an evil glint shining in their eyes.

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Agatha walked around the library, absentmindly running her fingers across the spines of every book as she was lost in thought.

The curse was her fault, yes, but she would never admit her mother was right. She would admit, however, that her stunt of gaining power in hope of overthrowing her mother was done in haste. If she had read the fine print maybe she wouldn't be in this position. She silently scolded herself as she saw a slight purple haze cover her vision as magic pooled in her eyes.

She had three nights, three, to find someone who could potential help her break the curse she put upon herself. Blinking away the haze, Agatha looked down at her hands, her black fingertips fading into dark grey veins up to her elbow. The words her mother spoke to her the night the curse was solidified rang in her head as she followed her unearthly veins with her eyes.

How could anyone love someone like her?

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You leaned against the tree your parents had planted the night of their wedding, tears streaming down your face as you clutched onto the scraps of your dress. You had slaved over this garment, days were spent tending to your stepmothers every word but nights were spent hunched over with a needle as you sewed a dress you had dreamed of. A dream that was nothing now. You were raised to be kind to all but as you recalled the event of this night, you felt hatred bubble in your chest.

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Excitement was all you could feel as you slipped into your dress, proud of your work. You had finished mucking out the stables hours ago, giving you time to wash the stink away from your skin and hair. Pride welled in you as you smoothed the fabric with your hands, opening your attic door to join your step-mother and step-sisters as they waited for the coach that would take you to the palace.

"Mother, look!" Anya practically shouted as you walked down the stairs, covering her smirking expression with a fan. Valentina spread her arms out in what you would learn to be false affection. Wrapping an arm around your shoulders, your step-mother examined your dress, pursing her lips. Quickly, the excitment you felt died like a dwindling fire as your step sisters joined their mother in circling you.

"Oh Y/N, I just don't think this'll work. This design is just...it has too many faults. Here, let us help."

Your confusion was replaced by cold shock as Valentina's hand shot out to rip part of your sleeve off. Anya followed, grabbing part of the skirt to pull on the seams. Damille's was the worst, using both hands to create a distance between the bodice and the top of your skirt. You stood frozen, tears streaming down your face angrily as they continued to destroy your hard work. It was over the second the familiar sound of horses sounded outside.

You don't remember what Valentina said to you before she left, or the snide remarks her daughters added on. All you remember was running, running through the house, running across the backyard into the open land where your parents tree stood proud.

And that's where you found yourself.

"How could you be so stupid?" You muttered to yourself as you wiped away tears, angry for allowing yourself to believe your step-mother could ever show you kindness. In your wallowing, you didn't notice how the ground in front of the tree started to swirl, how the wind changed directions, how a slight humming noise filled the air.

"Now why are you crying when you should be at the ball?" A slightly cocky voice spoke in front of you, unfamiliar yet comforting. Your head shot up and your eyes widened at the sight in front of you. A woman, wearing a sparling cloak stood expectantly, hand on her hip while the other held a wand. Blinking, you stuttered out a response.

"I, I can't go. They ruined my dress and my stepmother would recognize me. I don't want to deal with the aftermath."

The sparkling woman held out her wand, pointing it at you.

"I'm not too fond of this 'can't' business. You have a very obvious fairy godmother standing in front of you, ready to snap her fingers and say a catch phrase I created when I was younger. So tell me, Y/N, do you want to go to the ball?"

Without hesitation, you nodded and your fairy godmother waved her wand.

a/n: whoa cliffhanger, wonder what happens next...but seriously, i love doing AUs like this and I'll focus on getting my other wips out but lemme know if you enjoyed this??

[suffarustuffaru]

terrible ideas for rezero matching icons (arc 8 and ex spoilers)

spica going :D while julius and otto plot to kill her. this can even work extremely well without spica. here is some concept art. im gonna make this one real bc me and a pal wanna do it

^^ add in rem and subaru matching icons if you want (they’re screaming in horror)

felix / fourier / crusch but fourier is Deceased and felix and crusch are bawling

felix and julius………………………….. from That Scene in pride if

rowan, cecilus, and the heavenly sword.

cat garfiel and cat heinkel from garfiel’s theatre dream

rabbit. and subaru.

normal julius icon paired with a gluttonyed joshua.

pandora. and theresia. and a white bird

a set of astrea icons but louanna is eepy and theresia is just a jar of ash

greed if ottosuba icons but it’s a transparent otto going “gay gay homosexual gay” and subaru going “FUUUCK I CAN STILL HEAR HIS VOICE”. add in a matching echidna icon too

greed if subaru / a half-dead echidna. if you know you know

gluttonybaru / random ass book of the dead. like the matching icon to subaru is just a whole ass book

todd and subaru but like this:

^^ alternatively the same as the above but with louis and subaru

main route otto / a literal wall / greed if subaru

cute 🫶 matching icons but one is subaru and the other is satella’s shadow hands

emisuba icons but its them dead and holding hands from arc 1

anastasia, ram, subaru, and patrasche………………. from the miasma tunnel scene

meili / pushing amnesiabaru down those stairs

subaru…………………. and an unwashed cup

cute icon of emilia kissing subaru / subaru being FUCKJNG DEAD

arc 3 julisuba duel

julius / reid beating his ass

normal natsuki family icons!!!! with naoko, kenichi, an empty frame ("Subaru, where are you?"), and a jar of mayo.

subaru + getting stabbed/jumped by rachins, camberley, and gaston (the three guys from arc 1) + a hot woman watching them bc camberley has the dp of bedroom wiles—

cecilus / halibel / subaru (wrath if edition)

subaru, rem, their children, and appa man raising an eyebrow and asking him whether he is fine (sloth if subaru returning back to the arc 3 save point after dying of old age)

rem and “who?”

the barbie and ken meme with otto and subaru bc theyre definitely the kind of people to get arrested together. they literally have in a lost in memories if route

pridebaru doing half a hand heart / reinhard too busy crying to do the other half / emilia killing pride

little kid otto, otto’s cat crush, and the cat’s crush

joshua. and an apple. if you know you know

louis / rem strangling subaru LMFAOO

subaru flinging paperwork off frame / otto drowning in paperwork

the three idiots crossdressing! :) this is the most normal idea on this list.

EDIT BC I FORGOT TO ADD THIS ONE: regulus and reinhard in arc 5 being launched to the moon :)

some of these are ideas from my pals (you know who you are). also if you have more awful ideas or wanna see some of these become real feel free to say so 🙏🙏🙏

[carolperkinsexgirlfriend]

Steddie Upside-Down AU Part 114

Part 1 Part 113

It’s fully dark by the time they trundle into the trailer park. The sceneries nostalgic, almost. Steve at his side, his feet aching from too long upright, not another soul in sight. There’s no ash floating in the air, and no vines squirming on the ground, and the sky’s not an ominous red.

Will he ever be able to walk down this familiar stretch of street without thinking of that time?

He almost hopes not. Without the Upside-Down, when he and Steve ever come together like this?

Maybe it’s stupid, but he wants to hold onto those memories just as much as this one. They’re what got him here, holding Steve Harrington’s hand, floating past cloud nine and straight into the stratosphere.

His glasses are chock full of roses.

It’s a tragedy that he has to drop Steve’s hand to open and unlock the door, but he makes do.

Wayne’s on his recliner when they stumble through the door, holding a beer in one hand and the TV remote in the other. He glances away from the screen, double takes, then stares back, eyeing them both up and down with an eyebrow raised.

He takes a long, loud sip from his beer, then asks, “you boys have a fun night?”

Eddie glances at Steve, and it’s only then that he notices how disheveled they both must look. Steve’s lips are still swollen, and his hair’s fucked beyond repair. Steve’s eying Eddie in kind, making those same damning connections.

He looks worried around the edges, though, so Eddie does what he’s always done best: put on a show.

He turns to Wayne, hands planted on his hips and says, “Wayne, I’ve got something to tell you.” He reaches out, linking his hand with Steve’s once more. “I’m gay.”

Wayne snorts, coughing on his beer. It must burn because his eyes water as he gasps out, “you play too much, boy.” He wipes the overflow from his chin, glaring up at Eddie. “You finally figure your shit out?”

Eddie beams, squeezing Steve’s hand. “Stevie here figured it out for me.”

Wayne looks between them for a few seconds more before shrugging disinterestedly, says a flippant, “he’s my favorite son for a reason,” and then just turns back to the TV to continue flicking through channels.

And that’s it. That was all she wrote, and all that. The world just, keeps turning.

“Should we tell anyone?” Steve asks that night, curled up into his side the way he always is. “Besides Will?”

He pulls Steve closer, the fondness in his chest expanding to the point of pain. Will, who is a part of their fucked up little trio. Of course, they’ll tell him.

It might even help him come to terms with some things that were hard won, brutal battles for Eddie when he was Will’s age. Give the kid a little hope, and all that. Hope that there are partners better out there than Mike Wheeler, the turd.

Eddie hums, skimming his fingers up and down Steve’s arm. “Well, Wayne figured it out the minute he looked at us, that’s one down.” He holds up one finger before bringing it back to Steve’s arm and tapping it against it. “You told Carol, so that adds in her and Barb.” Fingers two and three, tap, tap.

“Jeff?”

“Oh, definitely Jeff.” Eddie raises a fourth finger, taps it once before unlocking his thumb so he can clutch Steve’s hand. He pulls it up to his own chest, pressing it to the beating of his heart. “He wants me to tell him about the Upside-Down.”

Steve’s quiet, and it’s too dark to read his face no matter how hard Eddie strains his eyes.

“Do you think I should?”

Steve sighs, digging his pointy chin into Eddie’s shoulder. “I don’t know, man.”

“Man,” Eddie cuts in, mockingly. “Your tongue was in my mouth like, ten minutes ago.”

Eddie’s body shakes with Steve’s quiet laughter. “Fine, whatever,” he huffs. “It’s not up to me, Loverboy.”

The nicknames got that same mocking edge Eddie himself had used. It still makes his heartbeat stutter in his chest.

“But I’m not sure this is a situation where not knowing would help them?” he continues, voice lilting up at the end like it’s a question. “I mean, it didn’t help us.”

Eddie sighs, letting himself melt into the springy mattress. Look at all of them. They’d left Carol in the dark, and she’d crawled her way into the inner circle by her hell-beast talons.

Stumbling around in the dark never helped anyone.

“I’ll think about it,” Eddie says, already knowing that its too late. The worm’s wriggled its way into his brain and made a home there.

But there’s an order to these things, and Will comes first, always. They clamber into Eddie’s van in the morning, ready to enjoy whatever somehow overcooked and overcooked concoction Mama Byers has made for breakfast.

Jonathan opens the door before they’re even out of the van. He leans against the door jam, crossing his arms and glaring hatefully out at them, still in his raggedy pajama pants.

“Johnny Boy!” Eddie calls, beaming as he bounds up to him, shoving past him to come into the house, uninvited. “You’re looking mighty cheerful this morning.”

“Sorry, I don’t have a cheerful face on for the early-morning uninvited guests,” he grumbles, stepping out of the way and letting Steve through with much less ire.

Eddie can’t blame him. Steve’s in his stupid yellow sweater looking soft and warm in the November air. Eddie can’t compete with that, doesn’t even want to.

“Is Will up?” Steve asks, in a far more appropriate volume for the early morning.  

Jonathan gestures toward the back of the house before stumbling over to the couch and sinking into it.

Mama Byers isn’t anywhere in sight, and the house is quiet enough that their voices may carry. Eddie’s not worried. These people are his family, and more importantly, they’re Will’s.

If the wall’s have got ears, he couldn’t pick anyone better to be listening. He’d bare any bit of himself here, if Will needs him to.

Eddie grabs Steve’s wrist and pulls him along toward Will’s bedroom. It’s time to get this show on the road.

Part 115

[beescrafting]

Johnny's Family.

Okay okay so i've been thinkinng about this for to long.

So in the end of MW2 the 141 get Johnny's ashes, not his family, the 141.

So this either believes me to think that Johnny doesn't really have a family or he was for better words for less, cut off and kicked out.

NOW HERE ME OUT-

we know Johnny's fruity in the game, its been hinted to us that he's the gay one (not ghost, ghost is Bisexual or Pansexual depending on where you wanna go with that its a whole other can of worms frfr)

Johnny was also brought up catholic...

When Johnny came out his family kicked him out and cut him off, they practically cut him off from the family tree no longer claiming him as theirs.

Thats why the 141 get Johnny's ashes, that's why they don't go to his family, Johnny was banished from his family from once he came out, and what do you do when you have no money and are just outta high school? You join the army. Johnny joined the army to avoid being homeless.

This also means none of his family tapped him out of boot camp.

Anyway, this thought has been in my brain for awhile and god can you imagine Christmas or Thanksgiving for him? He stays on base because he doesn't actually have a family to go back to, yes they are all living unlike Ghost's but they want nothing to do with him due to him being Gay.

To be honest that just makes him more relatable for a lot of people who've had to deal with that.

It explains why Johnny's so angry, why they get his ashes, why they spread his ashes.

Johnny's ashes were spread on those green hills in Scotland, in those highlands. Johnny's ashes were most likely spread there due to him talking about good memories there as kid where he had a family before they kicked him out for being gay.

the 141 was the most family like thing he's had since he was a wee lad.

[localcanadiancreature62]

MORE Perfect Plan/Perfect World au lore

More of This au. This time with the logistics of the Perfect World itself and also Lobotomy Husbands stuff.

More Lobotomy Husbands musings + how the Perfect World works: There's no official law or government in Ford's Perfect World. Bill *IS* the law,he secretly enforces every law there by having his clones from the og Dimension 46'/ tell the actual cops what to do and he threatens to kill them if they don't comply. Although despite this,there's actual government officials cops and even Barack Obama as the president however they're just as fake as Ford's "family" since they're mere copies made to stabilize the dream world that Bill made for his researcher husband. There's even various civilians to populate the dream world,which are fake as well.

Bill and Ford have been married for 10 years,which is also the duration of how long the dream world has existed. Ford is now 70,and he has been 70 for a while as time doesn't fly in the Perfect World. No one ages here,they remain the same age as they were "created". Fidds and Stan are still in their 60s,the twins are 12,Wendy is 15,Soos is 21,etc. The general populace also stays in a permanent time stasis as no one ages or actually progresses besides the changes that Ford or Bill has made to the world.

The Henchmaniacs aren't allowed in the Perfect World,as Bill knows that those chaotic bastards will ruin the permanent stasis bubble he made for his husband in one way or another no matter how many times he threatens them as he knows that it's in their nature to destroy things as the monsters of the multiverse. Which is why Ford never actually sees Bill's friends despite the triangle often talking about them.

They're not actually married. Bill and Ford aren't actually married. Bill deadass just put a ring on himself and Ford then called it a day soon after the Perfect World was created,erasing the man's memory of him randomly giving him a ring and replacing the memory with an actual ceremony with the Henchmaniacs attending. Tfw you call a man your husband when you didn't even have a ceremony and just made him THINK you had one fr fr.

Fidds Stan Mabel Dipper Wendy and Soos are NOT aware of anything that's going on in the Perfect World. These mfs are literally empty husks with set instructions on how to act or feel,their personalities and desires are PROGRAMMED into them by Bill as if they were living dolls. Only Fiddleford is starting to become aware as Bill somehow managed to make him TOO advanced as he was given alll of the assets in order to be Ford's perfect bestie,which suddenly made him develop feelings and thoughts but Bill keeps erasing his memory every time so that he won't find out about the Horrors (everything is fake the world he lives in is a lie and his entire being is a lie and he's merely a clone of a man that was far more real than he is :]),but he doesn't know that this exact advanced copy will lead to his eventual defeat.

Ford is 100% aware of the horrific shit that Bill gets into like destroying and conquering worlds torturing people and literally having the entire multiverse under his palm but instead of being horrified about the fact that he's married to a monster,he's basically like "Oh that's nice,dear" because he's too damn happy and gay to notice how fucked up his triangular husband is. There is such a thing as being blinded by happiness...

The Perfect World was created after Bill grabbed the ashes of Dimension 46'/ and shaped the remains of the dimension into his researcher husband's happy place with his newfound abilities of controlling space matter and time. He made an entirely new dimension with the remains of the original one,one with moldable qualities and a permanent time stasis (Time Baby would be thoroughly pissed at the existence of a dimension where time doesn't progress if he was still alive). The Perfect World has since been called Dimension Infinity after the Axolotl acknowledged it as an official part of the multiverse, it's called such due to it having infinite possibilities with Bill constantly molding different aspects into it (but really out of universe,i just wanted it to sound cool fodndjdnd).

I was serious about Bill being the Ruler of the Multiverse. He deadass got exactly what he wanted after he made Weirdmaggedon global and "liberated" Dimension 46'/,with everyone in the multiverse worshipping him out of fear and slight admiration for managing to have the entire multiverse at his fingertips due to his sheer power. But really it was all because of his assets,and him realizing that he the more he uses his powers the more his power grows as he can now control EVERYTHING like he said "I can control Space,Matter,and now that the dumb baby is out of the way,Time itself!". Bill managed to get the Time Anomaly Removal Crew as well as Time Baby's old time soldiers at his side,he ended up having most dimensional rulers to agree to his demands regarding him being able to freely manipulate or destroy their worlds as he wishes lest they get their organs turned inside out,and he even got the Axolotl to let him take on their role of watching over the multiverse for them while also giving him permission to create worlds as he wishes. However the Axolotl was half bluffing,as they only let him take on the Multiverse Ruler role while not letting him freely create worlds besides being able to mold the Perfect World as he wishes. Because they knew that Bill's new plan was going to fail horribly one day,and letting him have everything he wants will slowly make him realize that he made a mistake once it all crumbles down on him in the end.

In the Perfect World,nothing gets in nothing gets out unless they have Bill's permission. Bill was somehow able to grab his memory of the Gravity Falls natural law of Weirdness Magnetism and he ended up expanding on it so that it would reach a dimensional scale. This is why interdimensional anomalies besides the ones that already exist inside of the Perfect World won't be able to get in,as only Bill has the ability to collapse the barrier with his current higher power level. No one really wants to stay there anyway save for a few refugees from decaying or destroyed dimensions,because everyone in the multiverse know that Bill is bad news and that they figured it would be better to not interact with him at all lest they get their skin turned inside out for merely insulting him or Ford. Bill did this because he doesn't want anyone to go in and ruin everything for his husband's dream world with their chaos.

I mentioned that the Perfect World doesn't change unless Bill or Ford do something to it. Bill's changes are usually precautionary measures or putting in things that Ford would like,such as a setting that causes any intruder to be electrocuted once they enter the buildings that they own/are associated with such as their condo the Oregon Institute of Oddology the Stanley Co Comics building Dipper and Mabel's house that they live with Stan and their fake ass parents (lightning bolts are set to appear and electrocute enemies until they die. Bill is playing with this world like the fuckin sims) and a museum where ancient extinct anomalies are on display (the bigfoot mothman etc) while Ford's changes are usually science/environment related such as having Bill invent a new mineral that replaces plastic so that people will use something renewable AND one that's better for the environment (also to feed his ego cuz he'll be hailed as a revolutionary for this invention loll) or making the triangle create a chemical that is more dangerous and potent than radiation so that he has better fuel for his giant death ray machine (made for.. entirely research related reasons and not because Ford wants to see a machine that can kill thousands,totally totally not).

Bill and Ford got EXACTLY what they wanted,with Bill being able to rule the multiverse with his genius by his side while Ford is a successful genius like he always wanted if he didn't fail to attend West Coast Tech university. They got everything they wanted,but at what cost?. At what cost,Bill/Ford?. Bill has to try everything to keep Ford happy lest he'd be all alone again with a miserable genius that hates him and things would go back to the bitter way they were while Ford is outright living a lie no matter how happy he is with it..

Ford is slightly more unhinged now that he lives in a world with no consequences i.e one where Bill can immediately reverse time to get rid of all casualties with his newfound power. He freely creates machines that can cause whole species' to go extinct,he has made guns that can kill a thousand men,the chemicals he has unleashed to the public are more noxious than any regular mineral,and he may or may not have made Bill create a self destruct device for their house if any intruders got in (it would kill the intruders by the time they escape). He is absolutely batshit insane and Bill loves him even more for it,especially when he's the one enabling Ford's crazy experiments without once making him doubt whether it's safe or not since he can just reverse everything whenever something goes wrong.

Oregon still technically exists in the Perfect World which is why it's called the OREGON Institute of Oddology,except Oregon America is the only place there. None of the other countries exist,Bill purposely made Oregon the only state and America the only country so that Ford would never want to leave (talk about possessive amiright?). He isn't even aware of the fact that he's living in the middle of nowhere nor the fact that America is the only country smack dab in the middle of an empty white void as he's too preoccupied with his picture perfect life to care.

Story wise,the beginning and the end has all of the lore and fucked up shit. The middle part however,is entirely just happy Lobotomy Husbands. As this particular section contains the entirety of their 10 year marriage. (okay but it's so funny that the entirety of the story is in two parts meanwhile there's a whole section where there's just married gay people pffft).

This au is set in Gravity Falls,but it's no longer a geographical anomaly when it's literally the only place that exists in the Perfect World's version of Oregon. The town is exactly the same as canon,only with no mayor or founder or history with the Northwests and Bill is it's sole leader.

[ca-suffit]

sorry how long this is, but this fandom is pissing me off so much and I need to rant a little before I explode lol.

-- madeleine (nonchalantly) says of sleeping with a literal nazi, "I was inviting a frightened boy to cradle my tits," and then when louis turns her we see this as a pleasant memory, and I'm supposed to believe someone who could take pity on a nazi (even if he "wasn't dedicated to the cause") and remember him fondly isn't going to be racist? so I'm the weird one for finding claudeine to be a gross ship and being exasperated by seeing edits of them flood my dash? and every time I talk about this on ANY platform, I mostly get ignored and the few people who do interact w my posts are denying it and saying she had to do it to survive, as if she didn't also literally say she grew up rich like 30 seconds prior.

-- a decent chunk of the anti lestat crowd insists he participated in the trial as an act of revenge and can't say his name w/o talking about how they hate him (bc his racism + abuse), and these are the same people going apeshit over ben daniels saying that santiago was gay and in love with armand, as if he isn't one of the most antiblack characters we've met on the show bc he was quite literally eager to put on the trial solely bc he hated louis for falling asleep during one of his performances. and don't get me started on his monologue about claudia's ashes. and yet ppl are excitedly eating ben's interview up. 🙄

-- the narrative literally showing us that lestat has changed since the attempted murder (going off script on the trial in defense of louis & claudia, taking accountability for his abuse, staying silent about the fact that he was the one to save louis & letting him leave w armand when we know how terrifying being alone is for lestat, spending decades living in that shack and eating rats to punish himself vs the hedonistic & decadent lifestyle we saw him living in s1) and the anti lestat crowd claiming this is just him being manipulative and are furious that the writers had louis forgive him. like normally I agree that it's in very poor taste to paint an abuser as sympathetic, but the thing about this show is that these characters are immortal and have all the time in the world to change. like this isn't the writers sweeping it under the rug, they're explicitly acknowledging how horrific lestat's behavior was and there are literally canon glimpses showing us that lestat has become a better person (and I'm sure this will be fleshed out more next season as we'll get his pov) and, like, isn't it a good thing to see an abusive character realize the error of their ways and alter their behavior and become better????? like it's fair to not want to see that, but this is the wrong show to be watching if you can't handle seeing abusers change their ways & being forgiven by the people they've hurt (especially since it's pretty much confirmed armand/daniel is going to happen at some point and given I'm sure they'll be circling around each other, I feel confident that louis will eventually forgive armand too)

ur fine, u can rant! I have a lot in my inbox but I try to get to it all eventually in whatever way.

idk how much u wanted me to comment on anything or not, but I'm gonna add comments and u do whatever u want with it.

a) ur never going to have an easy time criticizing a white woman in fandom. it reflects too much of what fandom is usually made up of and ppl will usually tell u it's misogyny to judge these characters if u ever try (most of the time it's not, but that's a convenient excuse to shut down convos).

the show intentionally makes everyone do p questionable shit, especially the white characters. it doesn't tell u how to feel about it, that's up to u. that makes ppl uncomfortable. it goes further too when it is someone like madeleine, who is otherwise seen in positive ways. it's reflective of real life and that's what scares ppl the most. nobody ever fits in a box of only "good" or "bad." a lot of what the book for IWTV asks too is what defines that anyways? and S1 also said "are we the sum of our worst moments?" so it is constantly asking u that and it is for u to decide and reflect on.

b) white, gay stuff is also gonna be popular in fandoms. ben daniels is also gay irl and his husband just died so there's crossover from that to praising his character bcuz ppl feel sympathy for him. I also think ppl detach more from his actions bcuz he's not romantically linked to the characters he's torturing. ppl also just honestly dgaf about antiblackness anyways so for most ppl it's easy to overlook. which is how we get posts like this.

I mean, u can also like whatever characters u like for any reason. some ppl like characters not bcuz they support what they do, but bcuz they're just enjoyable to watch in performance or connection to the plot or whatever. I think examining santiago after what ben said about his performance is something ppl should be able to do, and again it circles back to the stuff I wrote for madeleine. where does ur (general u) discomfort lie and why? as u said, if it's ppl who dislike lestat then it's worth looking at that too, why are the characters different then?

c) there's sort of 2 things happening for this part. the first is that 2x8 did have pacing issues, for whatever reasons. a lot of ppl felt like it flattened the plot and characters for the sake of making lestat look the best (over armand) and rly shoving it in out of nowhere. the second part is what u said about the themes. I've always figured they were going to explore forgiveness and personal growth, but I also know it isn't going to be easy for ppl to follow. hopefully the full seasons coming do a better job of this but for 2x8 there were a lot of reasons ppl felt crazy about the way it was shown to us. I also agree that other characters will have these journeys with each other too. it was just such a sharp turn for S2 to end on highlighting the white character we've otherwise seen as being p horrible and suddenly saying "it's the brown character who rly did the worst!" I don't think they intended to come across like that but it's how it landed for a lot of ppl. it doesn't mean ppl have an issue with the concept of forgiveness and stuff otherwise. we'll have to see how it goes. but ya there's 2 things going on there for this rn.

[joapmactavish]

imagine soap recognizing that you’re stressed out with your current work and he knows you guys can’t leave base so he sets up a blanket and pillows outside for you to stargaze -

| no warnings just fluff and jokes, reader calls ghost gay (real) , can be interpreted however you want (gn reader, f!reader, m!reader), can be platonic or romantic although my intentions are leaning on a romantic bond. dialogue color code: soap: light blue, price: purple, ghost: red, gaz: green(can you guys tell that i love them and want to put them all in my pocket) | • this is generally a softer portrayal of the guys, if u aren’t into that sorta thing that’s cool just a heads up •

“ca’mere lassie, wanna show you sumthin”

he leads you outside by the hand and you’re met with a little blanketed area on the soft grass , plush pillows and he’s even lit your favorite candles / incense - he lays down and opens his arms for you to join him and you both wrap your arms around eachother - your legs intertwined being as close as possible - feeling his heartbeat against you.

“i know there’s not much we can do here sweetness, and this may be cheesy but i know how much ye love random surprises, just wanted to give you a little change of routine tis all”

you scrunch your eyebrows at him saying it’s cheesy, “you do know i’m a sucker for anything cutesy you do johnny, but this is so sweet, look how bright the stars look! so pretty.”

“they look wonderful but they’re nothing compared to you bonnie, you’re my stars, my moon, my world, hell- the entire universe and you’ve made my life infinitely better”

you give him a pout and scooch up to give him a kiss, “nothing i say can be better than that, but just know i love you too and-“ you’re stuttering now and he chuckles “and- i agree but l- yknow- that- i-“ you take a quick pause and he nods at you teasingly, “you’re my world.”

the guys find you two outside and you end up finding yourself all together sharing the moment now, so of course you all have to adjust and make room.

your head is laying on soaps shoulder while he has his arm wrapped around you, price has his head laid against your legs, gaz is behind the 3 of you with his head on the same pillow soaps head is on but he’s laying on the opposite side and ghost is sitting criss cross (apple sauce ofc) by you all.

price lights his cigar and takes a deep sigh - tension leaving his body as he relaxes his shoulders .

“ya know y/n, you really do know how to bring us all together in your own goofy way.”

“WHAT?! I SET THIS UP?” soap replies and you gaz and ghost laugh.

“yeah was all him, not me cap’n! i swear!”

“ah yes, if it were you- there would’ve been tea.” he flicks the ash off the end of his cigar

soap rolls his eyes, “fuckin brits . . . never tired of the damn tea”

you don’t know how but you all end up out there all night - sharing jokes and stories, childhood memories, playfully making fun of eachother and cuddling like chumps, price asking you to run your hands through his scalp and huffing anytime you stop (like when a dog side eyes you as you stop petting them) and then quickly smiling when you continue - you even caught simon swinging his legs while you were sharing scary stories and you and gaz almost died of laughter

“that shit was gay as hell” and he just rolls his eyes and grunts

but what did it for soap was the fact that gaz starts snorting with his laugh, and you’re wheezing.

these men were known to be very intimidating scary beings, soldiers and fighters first - but ever since you joined them they started remembering to have more fun - being that they joined this line of work so early in their lives they lost most of the opportunity to just exist and be. after the shit they’ve been through in their lives, you manage to just strengthen the faith they have in humanity with your caring tendencies.

after a while you can hear price snoring and ghost lets out a “heh, the old man’s fell asleep”

price slurs out a tired “m’not sleepin- just resting my eyes soldier.”

“right, i too snore when i “”rest my eyes”” sir” gaz says,

you just shush them and giggle but lightly, not to stir price since he’s against you still, arm now wrapped around your leg.

[thatswhatsushesaid]

more salty commentary about.... salty fandom commentary, but for a fandom i'm not really involved with

ftr this is about the gay-ass (affectionate) vampire show

squinting at some of super vitriolic anti-armand commentary that tumblr's algorithm keeps throwing at me like 'this? you want this one bestie? no? what about this one instead?' when in fact i want none of these takes, actually. "i don't believe a word that comes out of that lying liar's mouth!!" "of course he could have stopped claudia and madeleine's murders, he's the most powerful vampire in the world!!" (uh, i'll come back to that one later. maybe. if i feel like it) "he was onboard the 'let's murder claudia!' train from the very beginning!!!" etc. if you're even peripherally keeping your finger on the pulse of this fandom's discourse, you've probably seen some of this, too.

and... okay. bearing in mind two things:

it's been about 20+ years since i read the original novels, and

the show's relationship to the original novels, as well as the 1994 movie, is both conversational and subversive,

two seasons into this delicious mess, how are we still collectively failing to recognize that the central conceit of amc's retelling is that, intentional or not, all recollection of louis' past is both catharsis (for louis) and performance (for ???)? that all of louis' recollection of his own actions, as well as the actions of the other vampires in his orbit, is filtered through the lens of his own feelings about those vampires in that moment? like this isn't a subtle storytelling device, this is something the show is repeatedly bashing us over the head with again and again and again: louis' reliability as a narrator of his own experiences can't be trusted even when he isn't so consumed with rage that he tries to drain twenty year old daniel molloy dry for the unforgivable crime of /checks my notes, mouthing off at him like a dumbass, or goes into vulgar detail describing to lestat precisely how he is going to kill him, cut his head off, and then feed his decapitated head to lions at the zoo. which, it bears mentioning, is not the version of events that we were presented with during s1, but it is the version of events that louis himself comes to reluctantly believe is the more accurate recollection of the past.

does that make lestat into The Real Victim™️ who did nothing wrong to louis or claudia, ever? please tell me you're not actually asking me this question. be serious.

the point is that louis is right in the thick of feeling his intensely passionate vampire feelings about armand in real time, in the present day, while looking backwards through time at the 77 years they have spent together, and he is questioning everything. justifiably so, for the record! why wouldn't he question the actions and motivations of the supposed love of his life after discovering that such an important memory from his and daniel molloy's shared past was erased from his mind? but seriously, if you have reached this point in the story and your takeaway from the last episode boils down to "THIS TIME louis' recollection of the past is definitely 100% accurate! the rose-tinted glasses are OFF and we can see the TRUTH about you now armand!!!" then i just. i don't know what to say to you. lmfao.

anyway rather than getting into the weeds with anyone actually in the fandom about which of these diva vampire daddies is right, actually, find me hanging out with claudia and madeleine's ashes giving all of them the proverbial finger. because honestly, fuck all these vampires (affectionate).

[eppysboys]

Sam Leach and Joan McEvoy's Engagement Party, 17th March 1962 🕺💃

Earlier in the evening, The Beatles performed at the Village Hall in Knotty Ash, Liverpool. The evening was billed as a "St. Patrick's Night Rock Gala". Sam Leach, (Liverpool concert booker) booked The Beatles and Rory Storm and The Hurricanes to draw a big crowd so that he could make enough profits to pay for his engagement party, scheduled to follow the night's show. Both bands attended Leach's party, which didn't end until the following afternoon. Also present at the party was Mike McCartney, Paul's girlfriend Dorothy 'Dot' Rhone, Brian Epstein, Bob Wooler and Ted 'Kingsize' Taylor.

In his book Sam Leach has a distinct memory of 'a gang of us' (presumably including Beatles and Hurricanes) travelling to the party from Knotty Ash in a van. Their driver (not Neil Aspinall) pulled out from the Village Hall into the path of a speeding articulated lorry which seemed to have appeared from nowhere. Everyone braced themselves for the inevitable impact but miraculously the lorry, its brakes screeching hysterically, managed to stop less than a foot from the side of the van. Shocked, stunned, shaken and stirred, everyone in the van travelled the 1.5 miles to the party in complete silence. 

Hurricane Johnny 'Guitar' Byrne diary entry for 1962 mentions the party:

"Bought Zodiac. Knotty Ash, Orrell, then Sam Leach's engagement party. Had row with Eileen. Got home 6."

The party was at the family house in Huyton, thrown by Dolly, mother of Vera and Joan McEvoy.

"I can vouch for the fact that Brian fell in love with Vera and pursued her all night. In fact after the party he wrote more than one letter to Dolly asking her could she help him fix a date with Vera. Unfortunately for Brian she wasn't interested." Sam Leach (She seemed a little interested, as displayed below)

"Brown, who was married (but separated) at the time of her liaison with Epstein in 1962, describes him as "...very emotional. He always gave the impression of being cold and icy, but he was very softhearted, very tender, very gentle, and he had a lot of feelings. And he was all man, I don't care what they say." (Ray Coleman, The Man Who Made The Beatles)

"We’d been to the Knotty Ash Club for my sister’s engagement. The Beatles had played there, as did Rory [Storm] and a few other groups. Afterwards, as usual, we all went back to the house and Brian came along.

If you saw the Beatles in my mother’s they were just a scruffy bunch of boys. And who’d look at them? I wouldn’t bother with them but then Brian stood out and Brian looked like the real thing. He was handsome. He was tall. He was immaculate. That’s why I let Brian get behind the bar with me and help me serve the drinks. He was the best of the bunch.

So we were just behind the bar when Elvis came on, 'Heartbreak Hotel’. He loved it, I loved it, and we started dancing. There wasn’t much room. You know, you could go two steps forward, three steps back and that was it. So we sort of got a bit close and everyone was laughing at us, saying, like, 'What’s going on?’ But if you moved sideways you fell over the crates. There were crates of beer in there and everybody’s coats. We ended up on top of the coats or on top of the crates if we just moved the wrong way. And we got pretty close but I wasn’t surprised by the way he was acting towards me.

We were dancing and kissing at the same time. He was probably one of the sexiest fellas I had ever met. People say, 'Oh well, Brian was gay.’ but he wasn’t very gay with me. He was just like any other man and more. He was very easy-going and casual and funny. He’d make you laugh and he could dance. You know he could move. He said to me, 'I’ve seen you in different places and I thought you were stuck up.’ And I said, 'Well, I thought you were stuck up because I remember being in your shop and you were like the big boss.’

I think he was pretty fresh. In a house where people are looking at you it’s not like a club with all the lights out and people tend to be aware of others but Brian wasn’t that bothered. He was interested and he showed it. Maybe he’d had a bit too much to drink. I don’t know. But I can’t say that because I met Brian afterwards and he was still interested.

The next day he called round to the house. I wasn’t there so he talked to my mother about poetry. I don’t know how they got talking about poems but Brian came the following day with a book of poems for my mother with a little letter. He also gave her a letter thanking her for having the party because everyone had made such a terrible mess of the house. It was full of eggs and rubbish and bottles everywhere and he apologized for the actions of everybody else at the party.

Well, my mother just thought he was the most wonderful person in the world. At last a gentleman has come through this door and not Teddy boys and hooligans and all the rest of it. In the first letter he said he’d enjoyed meeting her, loved coming to the house, felt so welcome and would she mind if he came around again to see me. I said to my mum, 'Well, that’s impossible. How can I see him? You know I can’t go out with Brian.’ She said, 'You will have to’.

My mother was in love with Brian: 'He’s beautiful. He’s wonderful.’ So she sort of arranged it. I didn’t want him to come and pick me up at the house because I didn’t want people to see us going out. I arranged to meet him in a little cafe in Bold Street. We had a coffee and a chat and then I can’t really remember where we went. We went somewhere for a drink around Bold Street where there were all these little dives at the time. But I had to be back for nine o'clock. Another time I met him in the Tower and we had a little chat. We met in the back office and had a talk.

I liked Brian as a man and I think Brian liked me. But then he suggested if we were to go out we’d have to go to Southport or Manchester - anywhere out of Liverpool because he didn’t want to walk into my husband in Liverpool. We were separated at the time but it was a little bit awkward, you know.

It’s hard for me to believe Brian was gay. I think if I had been free and if I’d seen more of Brian I think we could have got serious. I think he was all man. I just can’t accept that he was gay.

In the shop Brian seemed like a man, like your dad shouting at you and superior. He had an attitude of superiority. But later on I discovered he was just like any other man. I thought he was a very passionate, loving person. He was like two different people. So if there’s a third person involved - this gay person - I just say he’s one hell of a man to be able to please everybody. You know, he was just unique. That’s all I can say." Vera Brown, In His Life, The Brian Epstein Story.

"George always fancied Joan and when I began dating her, he asked her to let him know when she finished seeing me. 'But don't tell Sam', he added. 'He’d batter me!' Today she probably feels like battering me for spoiling her chances." Sam Leach, The Rocking City

"Later in the evening, Joan had a headache and said she was going upstairs for a lie down. I went to fetch a couple of aspirins from the kitchen and said I'd follow her. Bob Wooler then made a typically cheap remark about pre-marital sex. Before I had a chance to sort him out, Paul and George grabbed him and made him personally apologise to Joan." Sam Leach, The Rocking City

"Rory Storm was lying on the floor hopelessly drunk. He shouted up to Paul, 'I wanna be in the picture'. So, as you can see, Paul bent down and lifted his foot into the shot." Sam Leach

"The night rolled on and I found Lennon, completely sloshed, sitting in the kitchen rolling raw eggs down Ann Barton's birds-nest hairstyle. Each time one broke, he gave a gasp of astonishment at the gooey yellow mess spreading across the tiled floor. Dolly found out and gave him a severe rollicking, which sobered him up enough to utter a sincere, 'Sorry, Mrs Mac'. Everyone liked and respected Dolly McEvoy and that was the only time I ever saw Lennon genuinely humbled. He disappeared for a while after that and was found later fast asleep in the bath.

When he finally came downstairs, he once again started to apologise. Dolly had forgotten all about it, but he was still apologising as he left at nine the next morning. As we stood outside, he shook my hand gravely. 'That was the very best party I've ever been to . . . honest,' he croaked. I was pleased everyone had enjoyed themselves, but when John started thanking me for a third time, I put him in a taxi and packed him off home. As he left, I slipped an egg into his pocket. He never did tell me how that hatched out." Sam Leach, The Rocking City

[rei-ismyname]

From The Ashes - Mystique

So, Mystique has her own book once more with issue #1 dropping on October 16th. Given the state of the Marvel world at the moment (or at least the X-books, everyone else seems focused elsewhere while mutants are being slaughtered and imprisoned... again) it really feels like Raven Darkholme's time to shine.

Looks cool but feels like something's missing

She hasn't had a solo book since 2004 - 20 years - and a lot has changed since then. She was quite the breakout character during the Krakoan age - she got her wife Destiny back, she found a sort of understanding with their son Nightcrawler (and we all learned the truth of the retcon in a pretty slick way), and perhaps most importantly we got a sense of her interiority. I'd be remiss in not mentioning Rogue, but they weren't really in each other's orbits until Fall of X. YMMV, but she became sympathetic for the first time ever. We got to see her interact with almost everyone as an uneasy ally while still being her bad bitch black ops self. Not friends, but on the same team with the overarching investment in keeping their shared home working. There was a foundation of connective tissue there right until the end.

Be Gay, Do Crime?

Alas, the wheel has turned again and Krakoa is no more. The connective tissue is gone. However, out of the three people she was closest to narratively - Destiny, Kurt and Rogue - the relationship I'm truly invested in seeing more of is her and Destiny. The book isn't called Mystique and Destiny, and she's not in any of the solicits or preview artwork, but surely they wouldn't do a Mystique book without her, would they?

My favourite sapphic terrorists

Yeah, I think they would tbh. Destiny is a very complex character to write and she was so entwined with Krakoa from the start in HoxPoX due to the nature of her gift - seeing possible futures. As the narrative pulls away from Krakoa, as we look for those pieces of connective tissue, as character growth is left by the wayside or undone, the world and stories are getting much smaller. Destiny had reached the promised land and her gift was focused on survival - of the married couple and Krakoa itself. I'm just not sure where she'd fit in a From The Ashes world.

Such a strong partnership too - Sherlock Holmes and Irene Adler.

The elephant in the room is that the pair are very popular and I'm pretty sure the Mystique-buying demographic would have something to say about Destiny being absent. I'm thinking the Magneto treatment is likely, some contrived way of keeping her in the margins of the run or even depowering her. We know Mystique is going to be more of a face than she's been in the past, 'protecting mutants.' That is a good thing as her motivations were often baffling pre-2019. Her behaviour was often handwaved with 'craziness' which is not good for any character, especially a woman.

Destiny in her distinctive mask is visible in this header, although...

This was somewhat explained in Fall of X that Xavier's (consensual) memory tampering knocked something loose, for lack of a better term. I'm hoping the growth we saw sticks, and I don't think that's unrealistic, it's the rest of it. What prompted me writing this was the AIPT review of the first issue. It all sounds exciting but the only other character mentioned is Nick Fury, nothing on Destiny. Any reviewer worth their salt should have a sense of expectations, and the absence feels meaningful.

Obviously this is all speculation, which is fun, though I'm not going off nothing here. I'm trying to be mindful of being the 'Krakoa was the best and this shit sucks' person, but Krakoa WAS the best and I really don't want From The Ashes to suck. I don't have any control over that, though I do have control over my expectations.

Bling! knows what's up, leaning on the fourth wall.

The last thing I think needs consideration is that the couple got the Wedding Special very recently. It was pretty good, though I thought the best parts were the Claremont interview and Anole's ongoing protest. But it was popular!

Mystique would LOVE that. Bisexual Menace for life.

He ended up putting it on a t-shirt. I need one!

As fun as it was and as much hype it got at the time, remember that it was a Pride Month thing. Ever the rainbow capitalists, Marvel picked a winning focus but I don't think they'd have done outside of Pride Month. Sadly, that might apply to their relationship as well. I think it would be a miscalculation, but the signs point to it being a solo book. As I often say in my doomsaying posts, we shall see and I hope I'm wrong.

They're just too iconic and work so well together. Don't get me wrong, good writing can make anything work. Aside from my ongoing mourning of Krakoa, WLW rep is important and for all their faults they deserve love like everyone else. Maybe a Sisterhood of Evil Morally Ambiguous Mutants is on the cards?

[chickensoup1025]

"Sayaka! Open the door! You need to calm down! Let's just talk about this!" Leon's fist banged on the bathroom door.

"Don't come inside! Please don't hurt me!"

He let out a frustrated sigh at her words and looked down to see the knife in his hand. "Oh jeez-" he set it on the farthest side of the dresser and came back to the door, but doesn't knock anymore.

"Sayaka?" He tried to make his voice as gentle as possible, like he's talking to a scared animal.

"Please!" Her voice was wobbly. He could clearly imagine her crying.

Leon turned around and leaned against the door, "I'm not coming in. Let's talk."

"N-no..." Soft sobbing.

He spent a few moments looking for something to say. "Why me?"

He waited almost a minute till a feeble voice piped up.

"I knew you'd come if I asked."

He could tell she was leaning against the door too, but sitting on the floor. So he sat down too.

A beat.

"Do you... hate me or something?"

"...No. I don't hate anyone here." she took a second to breathe, "I don't want to hurt anyone."

Even though Leon could see the damning evidence of that being untrue--the katana and its sheath on the ground, her knife on the dresser, cut slash marks on walls and floor--he still had a feeling she was telling the truth.

"So why then?"

"I have to leave." Sayaka's voice was full of conviction. Leon could feel goosebumps form on his arms. "..my friends... they're not safe. I saw in my video- something happened to them! Our lives as pop stars- everything I've worked towards- gone! I-I... I have to get out of here."

Leon thought back to his own video he watched mere hours ago.

-

"We're rooting for you, dude!" On the screen, Leon's best friend flashed a big smile and a thumbs up. Next to him were two more of their friends, all who he's known since childhood. "Good luck with the baseball stuff-" they all broke into laughter. Then the boy on the right said, "no, seriously, good luck with the ultimate musician thing. You're gonna need it, too." "Cause you sound like a dying horse!" "Shut up," the other was pushed out of shot with a smile. "Don't listen to him. You got this. We're rooting for you." "You better come home and visit as much as you can though!" "We love you, bud." "Gay." Suddenly, a horrible, horrible voice played over the paused clip. It was Monokuma.

"Leon Kuwata, The Ultimate Baseball Star... amazing in the diamond, and quite ambitious with his music dreams. What nice friends he has waiting for him outside the academy! But- oh no! What happened here?!" The video cut to the same setting of their school's bleachers next to the baseball diamond. But now it was abandoned, with what looked like ash blowing in the wind. Some parts of the metal benches were obviously scraped or slightly caved it. There was blood that slowly dripped down the steps, but the worst part was at the top. A human thumb. The screen then cut to black with giant red words, "Look for the answer after graduation!"

A knot formed in Leon's throat at the memory.

"Your friends, too, huh?"

[asbealthgn]

here is the last one!! thank you so much to everyone who has read these it’s been a delight but also i am NEVER posting a fic like this again lmao (this one can be read alone btw!)

Winter 2007

Steve wakes from fitful dreams to an empty bed and briefly panics. Even after twenty years, he’s still haunted by memories of the Upside Down. He still gets worried when he wakes up and can’t see Eddie. 

He pushes back the covers and gets out of bed, feet hitting the cold hardwood floors. He tugs a robe on to combat the cold and then opens the bedroom door. As soon as it’s open, he hears Eddie’s voice singing quietly and he relaxes. Steve pads softly down the hall to the living room. It’s dark, but he can see Eddie by the window, silhouetted by the streetlights. He’s rocking their daughter in his arms.

Steve leans against the entryway and listens to his husband sing in his soft, husky voice. “There’s a place I like to hide, a doorway that I run through in the night. Relax, child, you were there but only didn’t realize and you were scared. It’s a place where you will learn to face your fears, retrace the years, and ride the whims of your mind.”

The floorboard creaks under Steve’s foot as he shifts his weight, and Eddie stops singing. 

“Hey,” he whispers, looking back at Steve. Steve pushes off the wall and moves over to the window to join him, putting one hand at Eddie’s waist and the other on his arm by their daughter’s head. 

“How is she?” Steve asks quietly.

“She’s good,” Eddie murmurs. “She was crying, but she’s her father’s daughter so she went right to sleep when I started singing Queensrÿche.”

“What a good girl.”

Smiling, Eddie turns his head to kiss Steve. “Go back to sleep, baby,” he says, “I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Take your time,” Steve says. He bends over to press a kiss featherlight to their daughter’s forehead, then kisses Eddie once more before heading back to their bedroom. 

Before he closes the door, he takes one more look at Eddie. He’s started softly singing another song. Steve takes in the sight—his husband and his daughter. There are still nights when he wakes up screaming from nightmares, nights where he’s not sure if he’ll ever see the sun again. But nights like this when he gets to watch his little family that he’s always wanted and didn’t know if he would ever have, he feels so happy he could burst. 

On nights like this, life is beautiful.

(part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)

taglist: @adashofaroace @spectrum-spectre @girlwhoknewtheoriginoflove @cupc8keblonde @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @leeahpuppet @bidisastersworld @axltheedaddy @crushed-like-an-ant @whimsicalwitchm @hollysimone @awolfnamedaliac @gay-little-bitch @duckyreads @nelotegreitic @henderdads @iamsotiredman @thegingervulcan @mezmatch @stranger-poets-society @official-insanity-c @briceslayed @ohwelsh @lonestarcowpoke @lycriza @bejeweledbaby @a-huge-nerdy-nerd @cnfsd-bisexual @cheeseaddict-12 @wrenisflying @swimmingbirdrunningrock @sadcanadianwinter @ash-a-confused-enby @grtwdsmwhr @edgelordesworld @vecnuthy @lightwoodbanethings @soulminyg @notbatman00 @steve-the-hairrington @lizisodd @artiststarme @queerbeansworld @thegingerrapunzel @ceaselessly-watching @idkwwhatimmdoiing @ashlynjessi @yes-im-your-mom @steddie-there @thefailcollection @beeing-stuupid @anteaterballs @crunchiestdonut @xpaperheartso @messrs-weasley @absentlurker @panicatthediaz @thing-a-ling @bornonthesavage @momotonescreaming @slit-wrist @ironwolf11 @camachameleon @evix-syne666 @hotluncheddie @steddio @desert-fern @rotato-potato @captain-daryn @birondragon @alienace

(once again just reminding you that an extended version of this is being posted on ao3. i have 5 chapters up right now and i’m currently writing chapter 8 :D)

[johnlennonofficial]

Happy 2024 let’s talk about “Now and Then”

I’m not here to argue about quality or production or that chilling music video. I need you to really, truly, fully look at this from an open, honest viewpoint.

“Now and Then”, from the perspective of John Lennon, is absolutely, completely, mortifyingly embarrassing.

I think it’s fairly straightforward to deduce that the topic of this material is most likely Paul. Many of John Lennon’s post-Beatles songs mention this concept of rewinding time and starting again, often accompanying references to Beatles songs. Along with “Now and Then”, I think of “(Just Like) Starting Over”, “Real Love”, and “I’m Losing You”. There’s this misconception that in the ‘house husband’ period, John was happy as a dad and baked bread and took care of his kids. In actuality, according to Julian in Cynthia Lennon’s book John, John was deeply depressed and hardly left his bed most days. His plea to return back to a time before appears to be pre-house husband, and the wording seems similar to the language he shared with Paul.

With this context, “Now and Then” comes across as an attempt to have Paul in his life again. The language goes beyond platonic to this strange other realm. The fact of the matter is, his word choice is strange to share between friends, and truly comes off more as romantic.

Then, we get to Paul’s response. Paul doesn’t see this language as ‘romantic’, because it’s the language he and John have always used with one another. Paul has never, ever been good at picking up on social cues and is stuck in this zone of John was not gay because he “…never made a pass at me, darlin’.” Bless his heart, but he’s reading these lyrics and he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know it’s about him.

Because if Paul McCartney received such a personal confession of love from a man who was his closest friends for YEARS, he would NEVER have released it. This song is a coming out, and more blatant than any John released before. But Paul doesn’t know that because he cannot fathom the fact that John may be interested in him, no matter how many times it’s been clearly stated.

Paul saw a song by John, thought it was good, produced it, and released it. He released something akin to John’s diary to be forever memorialized as the last Beatles song, and he did so naively.

If you truly, truly believe for one second that John Lennon, a man who hit someone for insinuating he might be gay, a man whose heartbreak lead him to a stubborn feud with his muse, a man who wills rather drag nails in flesh than share more than innuendos to the public eye, would appreciate this being shared, you are either wildly out of touch or are in complete denial.

This song is not cute. It’s not romantic.

“Now and Then” is John Lennon’s waking nightmare. He’s alligator rolling in his grave. He’s ashes are so heated they’re 99% of the cause of climate change.

I propose that if you hate John Lennon or feel he deserves the humiliation of having a confession of love stripped bare before billions of people, go right ahead and continue talking about it. Keep listening. But pushing the piece forward with no regard of its obvious meaning, as a Beatles fan, is doing a severe injustice to the man you claim to love.