#as would say the great philosopher pitbull

[jelestes]

you can never convince me olivia benson is straight because why is she always so miserable around these men? she’s always looking for a way out of these relationships and don’t give me the “it’s because she’s always been in love with stabler” crap bc how could obsessing over the POSSIBILITY of a twenty year old will they won’t type of situationship with a married man be the real reason she keeps dragging herself over and over into those goddamn awful relationships? look me in the eyes and tell this doesn’t scream text book compulsory heterosexuality to you? exactly.

[lunas-side-anime-blog]

Modern College Student/BF Eren Yeager Headcanons

Armin version: HERE

Changed his major so. many. times.

Tried premed bc of his dad but then realized he had to take a lot of math and was like “lol no”

Was a business major for a bit but he didn’t have enough tact or strategy so dropped that pretty quick

Philosophy was next but he has such black and white way of thinking, he always got into arguments with the professors

Ethics was ruled out after like a week bc of…well, obvious reasons

Joined Armin’s major for like a month but it took so much studying and memory that he quit

Tried psych with Mikasa but yeah every teacher kept telling him to go to therapy??? And he was like “no thank you.”

Eventually i think he will land in something like sport communication or management, bc the competition really gets him fired up and he’s only good at something if he’s passionate about it

also feel like he’d be a college athlete with some scholarships so yeah, it makes sense

Not a great student tbh

Type of bitch to say “c’s get degrees.”

Really its only his public speaking skills that are keeping his grade afloat bc his presentations are sooo hype and get the class all inspired n shit

His essays and quizzes tho? Yeah, not so good

Bad at attending classes too, for sure will be like “srry my grandma died.”

And the teacher is just like “you’ve used that excuse already?twice??"

And hes just like “ugh fine you got me, I was tired and hungover”

Def tried to join a frat but Armin and Mikasa threatened to not be friends with him 

Still hangs with the frat boys a lot and is always partying with them

Pregames wayyy too hard tho, wasted before the party even starts

Unironically dances to lmfao and pitbull at college parties like “party rockers” is his fucking jam

Casual pothead, has a bong he def like nicknamed the “titan” cuz it’s so fucking huge

Will share his stash with you but like next time you got alc or bud just know he’s hitting that shit

High Eren is just really philosophical about freedom but with the munchies

Diet consists of instant ramen, mcdonalds and box mac n cheese, probably alot of redulls too

Thank god he’s athletic w a high metabolism 

Is fucking rocking the man bun and will fight you if you say otherwise

Games often with Jean, Conny and Sasha

Rage quits all the time and yes, Jean has recorded most of them for blackmail

Still uses snapchat streaks and will be so salty if one of his friends broke it

“You know nothing of loyalty. It’s one snap a day! How fucking hard was that?”  

Smells like irish spring body wash, old spice deodorant and weed

Also mint? I feel like he’s always chewing gum

One of those smokers who think he can just splash cold water on his face and chew on some gum and it wouldn’t be obvious that he’s high af

Carmex lip balm is the only slightly self care item he owns

Really into anime, loves the boss fights

I feel like he’d really like Naruto, Demon Slayer, Bnha or jojo’s bizarre adventure

You know anything with a lot of fights or training 

Ppl say he’d like Deathnote bc light but honestly I think he would get lost with all the twists and be like “why tf aren’t ppl just punching each other???”

Loves rap if he’s feeling good or screamo if he’s angry, like there's no in between lmao 

For sure listens to his music way too loud even with air pods

“Max volume isn’t enough, I wanna fuck the song” type of dude

I feel like him and Conny at one point prob tried to make a youtube channel where they like react to stuff 

Jean is the top commenter…..too bad it’s hate comments lol

Is one of those guys who has such a high body temp that even if it’s like december and snowing out, he’s still in basketball shorts and a short sleeve shirt 

Progressive bc Armin taught him how sex doesn’t equal gender, and pronouns are to be respected

Still a dick tho

“He’s such a fucking- wait hold up what are your pronouns?  They? K cool was just gonna talk shit about you but wanted to be respectful about it, thanks.”  goes back to his other conversation like, “They are such a fucking worthless cunt.”

As your bf

Probably met off tinder or something bc he is just a fuckboy looking to get his dick wet

But after fucking he just keeps hanging out with you? Or like if u get ur period or don't feel like sex he’s like, “it’s okay we can just watch a movie or something😀”

So ur not quite sure if you guys are fuckbuddies or not?

It becomes kinda obvious tho if he like ever sees you with another guy and gets all up in his face like “wtf are u doing with my girl/boy?”

U guys don’t have a clear anniversary bc he never asked u to be his, it was just kinda silently agreed upon?

Clingy lil bitch after sex like will follow u to the bathroom if u let him

Needs to shower with you, otherwise you both aint showering cuz he will turn off the water 

“Now we both stinky, bitch.”

Gives me the vibe of a guy who learned sex stuff thru porn

He goes really hard, fast and will put you in crazy positions

If u have a vagina you prob will have to like teach him about clit stimulation and literally take his hand and lead it there, he’s a fast learner though 

Will pull your hair but if you dare pull his?

He'll flip you over and spank you 

Wants sooo bad to be called daddy, up to you though if u wanna call him that but you can tell he tries to lead you to say it sometimes

Not really controlling or anything, actually loves an independent partner who has their own goals 

Is insanely jealous though, the only time he’s all up on you is if he thinks another guy is trying to get on you

If you fight tbh I think Eren can be a lil brat but I think he always has a time limit 

Like..he’s the type of guy that has about three days in him of being an asshole or being in silent treatment mode before he just breaks and knocks on your door begging for forgiveness

A little toxic but again, more so about others than actually controlling you

The type to start a fight in your insta comments if anyone other than him or your besties call you hot

Will try to be cool and say “wear whatever you want, I can fight”

And he will but like will he also cry later? Yes. 

Dates with him aren’t really dates? I think his love language is quality time so he’s the type to just try to hang out and make everything a lil “date”

Lots of late night car rides where you guys just talk and share songs (also car sex if ur up to it), lazy days where you two watch movies and cuddle in bed, also I think he’s the type of bf to try to tag along with you everywhere you go and offer to get you food afterwards

Only for like birthdays or anniversaires will he try to take you out for a fancy dinner, even then you might have to drop hints that you want a nice date bc honestly he’s totally okay getting mdconalds with you and pigging out

Overall he’s kinda a scary dog privellage as a boyfriend

Whose mainly all bark and no bite

(mostly)

Fav nicknames: Babe, babygir/babyboy, sexy, shortie 

Songs that fit the vibe: 505 by Arctic Monkeys, Cherry Waves by Deftones, Daddy Issues by the Neighbourhood

“I’d probably still adore you wth your hands around my neck”

“I’ll swim down with you, is that what you want?” 

“I tell you that I’m thinking about, whatever you’re thinking about”

[lurafita]

Petvengers Chapter 4

Read chapter 1 here: Chappy 1

Read chapter 2 here: Chappy 2

Read chapter 3 here: Chappy 3

 Bruce/Hulk

If anyone were ever to ask Peter, what it had been like the very first time he met Dr. Bruce Banner face to face, he would tell them that he was the embodiment of sophisticated professionalism, and not at all embarrassing.

If they were to ask anyone else that had been present at the time, however, they would tell a quite different story.

 - (about 2 years ago) -

“I'm really not sure about this, Tony.”

Bruce said, as he was led through the halls of the tower's common floor, by the far too excited engineer.

Tony just grinned.

“Relax, Brucie Bear. I'm telling you, you are going to love the kid. Fair warning though, he can talk. Like, boy, can he talk. If he starts rambling, don't try to get a word in edgewise, just let him get it all out. He will run out of oxygen at some point, and that's when you seize the opportunity to get the conversation back on track. Because, believe me, Pete will somehow manage to totally derail the topic. Like yesterday, when he came over after school, he started out telling me about his and his friend Ted's AP chemistry project, and suddenly we are in a deep, philosophical discussion about the representation of real life issues in children's cartoons. By the way, you should absolutely watch more cartoons in your free time. Some are surprisingly deep. Did you know that Sailor Moon was way ahead of the curve on LGBTQ relationships? And considering the time period in which it first aired, that's saying a lot. And Captain Planet was actually taking on AIDS hysteria in 1992. Not to mention the fact that in Steven Universe, child heroes have to deal with trauma, instead of things just getting swept under the table. Really, this stuff is more educational than you might think.”

Bruce side eyed his friend.

“So the kid goes off on a tangent suddenly and just keeps going, huh? Completely disregarding the topic you were just talking about right before, huh? Wonder where he gets this from. This sounds in no way familiar. At all.”

Tony either didn't catch the sarcasm, or ignored it, and nodded.

“Beats me. Can't be his aunt, that woman is scarily on point. She never let's you forget, or talk your way around anything. She is just like Pepper in that regard. I think its the Italian blood in May.”

Before the billionaire had the chance to get lost in that particular line of thought, Bruce cut in.

“Look, Tony, I'm not worried about whether or not I will like Peter. From all the proud dad raving you have been doing since I got back, I already know that he is a great kid.”

 (“Excuse you! I do not rave! Least of all proud dad like!”)

“I'm far more concerned about the kind of impact standing in a room with the man who turns into a giant, green rage monster at the drop of a hat, will have on a 15 year old. I'm really not looking forward to watching the kid run away in a panic.”

Tony scoffed.

“Oh please. If you turned Hulk at 'the drop of a hat', my tower would have crumbled years ago. Also, the kid is a superhero. He fought a maniac with alien weapons and a metallic bird suit. I'm gonna eat my 1.500,00 $ Italian leather shoes, if the Hulk scares Pete even a tiny, little bit.”

Bruce would have balked at the money that Tony spent on footwear, but at this moment, the two men stepped right into the living room. They were greeted by the sight of Steve, Bucky, Natasha, Colonel Rhodes, and one brown haired teenager. Which might have been a normal enough scene, if said teenager wasn't sitting cross legged on the ceiling, clutching a bag of marshmallows to his chest and alternating between stuffing one into his mouth, and trying to convince both Steve and Bucky that it counted as a healthy snack, since it was blackberry flavored.

And even though Bruce wasn't 'that kind of Doctor' he couldn't help but clear his throat.

“Actually, since the manufacturers have most likely resorted to using artificial flavors and food coloring, you probably have about the same health benefits from those, as if you just ate the sugar straight out of the container.”

Everyone turned to look at the two newcomers, and as the adults all smiled and stepped forward to welcome their friend, a wide eyed Peter lost his grip on both the bag of marshmallows and the ceiling, and fell to the ground in a heap. Before anyone could start panicking though, he was back up and with a kind of chocked off, high pitched scream/gasp, pointed his finger right at Bruce, and exclaimed “Don't move!” Then he ran out of the room.

And while Bruce had mentally prepared himself for just such a reaction, it still left him feeling rather disheartened. A quick glance around at the other people in the room showed three very confused Avengers (they had evidently not expected that reaction out of the boy), one Air force Colonel who was trying very hard not to laugh, and a grinning Tony Stark.

“So, should I be getting you some water to wash your ridiculously expensive shoes down with?”

Bruce asked the billionaire with a dispassionate sigh, but Tony was completely unconcerned.

“Just wait for it.”

They didn't need to wait even a second more after Tony had spoken, as Peter came running back into the room, arms overloaded with books, stacks of papers, and what looked like posters, which he all dumped onto the nearby couch table. Then the teen was suddenly right in front of Bruce and vigorously shaking his hand.

“Oh my god, Dr Banner, this is such an honor. You are like my favorite scientist ever! (Tony's indignant “Hey!” went ignored) I have read every one of your published papers and my friend may have hacked into your old university and found some of your papers that you didn’t publish, and now I realize that that’s not something I should tell you probably, please don’t sue us, but can you please sign everything I own and oh my god I’m shaking your hand and I’m never gonna wash that again ever. And can I get a photo, oh my god Ned is gonna be sooooo jealous!”

All the while Peter had been holding his phone in his other hand, blindly dialed a number and waited for the other person to take the call. Then he pressed the phone excitedly to his ear.

“Ned! Ned! You will never believe who I'm talking to right now! Think of the greatest scientist you know!... Okay, the greatest scientist you know who is currently alive... EXACTLY! (Once again, Tony's “It's like I'm invisible”, was ignored) Dude, I'm looking right at him. I'M SHAKING HIS HAND! … No, I'm not being a creepy fanboy... No, I have not yet let go of his hand...”

Rhodey laughed, Tony was jealously grumbling under his breath, Steve fondly shook his head, Bucky smirked, Natasha examined the impressive pile of things the teenager had brought for Bruce to sign, Peter continued shaking the scientists hand, while staring at him with awe-filled eyes and all but screaming into his phone, and Bruce... Bruce smiled.

 - (back to the present) -

It was one of the rare, lazy, late afternoons on a weekday, that found most of the Avengers hanging out on the newly built terrace behind the tower. The strangling hold that the high temperatures of summer had held over New York city for the last few days, was finally ebbing away and Peter had seized the opportunity to take Hope for an extended walk. (Steve had declined Peter's invitation to tag along. Colonel, Bucky and him had risen early as ever, and already run a few miles) He had also somehow managed to ensnare Bruce in a discussion about something that had gone over the collective heads of everyone around (Tony was still stuck in a board meeting that Pepper had dragged him to), and the dark haired scientist had seemingly unwittingly followed the teen and dog out of the tower.

The two super soldiers had curled up together in the porch swing, Bucky carefully keeping track of Arthur's progress, as the little raccoon tried scaling the garden table that held the snack food. Steve with a sketch pad in his lap, drawing the image of Eames the cockatoo, hopping around said table while chanting “Posh tosser, bloody wanker”, and occasionally dropping down a blueberry to Colonel, who was happily waving his tail at the treats.

Sam, for some reason, found his bird's antics endlessly funny, and was filming the whole thing with his phone.

Clint and Laura had spread a brightly colored blanket over the grass and were having a picnic with Nathaniel and Lila, while Natasha was showing Cooper some easy self-defense moves a few feet away.

When Hope's familiar barking and running feet were heard, the assembled group knew that Bruce and Peter had gotten back from their walk. The over eager Pitbull ran out on the terrace, greeting everyone in turn with happy licks and a wagging tail (he jumped first into the laps of the two super soldiers, let himself be scratched behind the ears, then ran right at Sam, nearly forcing the man to lose the grip on his phone when he licked him right across the face, then launched his furry body onto the blanket with Laura, Clint, Lila and Nathaniel, and patiently waited until all had pet him at least once, and finally trotted over to Cooper and Natasha to join in on their play fight.)

This had been expected.

What was not expected was watching Peter come walking out to the terrace, carrying a huge tortoise (about 25 to 30 inches in length), and grinning widely when setting the reptile down on the grass. Bruce was following close behind the teen, his face a curious mix of shell shocked and confused.

Peter straightened up from his crouch and addressed everyone, while Colonel and Arthur (who was riding on the dogs back), came over to examine the new, slowly moving animal.

“Everyone, meet Bruce's new friend, Speedy Gonzales!"

“She is a 33 year old Sulcata Tortoise. Sulcata Tortoises can live up to 70 years and above, and weigh up to 120 pounds. Speedy isn't that big yet, though. She did grow a bit too big for her previous owner, and the guy was too cheap to invest in a bigger terrarium, because she needs hot temperatures to stay healthy. She will be okay to roam freely during the summer, but we will have to turn one of the guest rooms into a heated enclosure for her when it gets colder.”

The still completely baffled looking Dr. Banner turned to face his friends and coworkers (the Barton's and Natasha had come closer to inspect the newest addition to their home).

“...I don't even know how that happened. … We were talking about the latest research on cross-species genetic transfers, and all of a sudden I'm standing in an animal shelter and signing adoption papers for a tortoise. … I didn't even know shelters had tortoises...”

Sam, Bucky and Steve, who had already been victims of Peter's crusade against a pet-less existence, held up their glasses in a silent salute to the doctor. Natasha proudly nodded at Peter's accomplishment, and he respectfully bowed to his Sensei. Eames had landed on Speedy's massive back, and was seemingly taunting Arthur from his perch. The little raccoon shot the bird a nasty look, and climbed up into Lila's embrace. Cooper and Clint both seemed fascinated with the size of the tortoise, while Hope jumped between the father and son to get back rubs. Nathaniel laughed happily as his mother helped him feed a banana to the reptile.

Speedy Gonzales brought honor to her species, by patiently tolerating the chaos all around her, and chomping down on the yellow fruit.

-

 Bonus: The Hulk!

"Uff!"

Spiderman shook himself free of the last remaining dust particles from the pile of debris he had dug himself out of, only a few minutes ago. All around him were the webbed up enormous bodies of the mutated rats. Some of them were twitching against their spidery cocoon, trying to get out of their bindings. Peter had done his best not to kill any of them, knowing that the animals had been victims of the illegal experimentation of the deranged Professor Stollack.

It wasn't everyday that a hoard of wild, three feet tall, rabid rats tried to take over Brooklyn. The whole team had been called in for some extreme pest control.

While Black Widow and Captain America had gone in search of the perpetrator behind this particular madness, Iron Man, Hulk, Falcon, Hawkeye, Thor, the Winter Soldier, Antman, the Wasp and Spiderman had taken to the streets and taken care of the mutated and very dangerous vermin.

Peter really felt sorry for the rats. While they weren't exactly among his favorite animals, they weren't evil. No animal was. And they didn't deserve to be experimented on and used like this, for one madman's twisted plans. He really hoped they could be returned to their original forms, and not have to be mercy killed.

/"Widow and me have taken the Professor and his underlings into custody. Everyone alright? Status report!"/ Came the Captain's voice over the comms that kept the team connected during battles.

/"I'm good, so is Feather-head."/ It was impossible to miss the smirk in Bucky's voice.

/"You won't be good for much longer if you keep it up with the nicknames, Frosty."/ As long as those two still argued, they were okay.

/"I'm fine, though Legolas might need to be checked for rabies. One of those things got a bite out of him."/ Peter would be way more worried, if Tony wasn't laughing as he said it.

/"My pants, guys, don't worry. No skin was breached. Mighty Mouse over there tore a fucking hole in my pants."/ Came Clint's answer.

/"His ass region, to be more specific. If anyone was wondering, Robin Hood is wearing Paw Patrol undies today."/

/"Look, Nathaniel likes the show, okay? How about we move things along?"/

/"Paw Patrol is cool. Call me when you watch it! I will bring Cassie!"/ Scott's joyful voice sounded.

/"Cassie only watches to keep you company, you know? By the way, Antman and I are both fine."/ Trust The Wasp to keep things under control.

/"I do not know this 'Paw Patrol', but I will gladly join you and your son for a viewing, if it is impressive enough for you to decorate yourself with."/ Fighting alongside the God of Thunder would never be not cool.

/"I'm okay, and I'm totally joining you for Paw Patrol. Got a bunch of the rats webbed up. Maybe Bruce can find a way to turn them back to normal. You know, once he has turned back to normal."/ Peter finally chimed in.

/"Speaking of, does anyone have eyes on the Hulk?"/ It was sadly impossible to equip the green guy with an earwig.

Spidey took a careful look around himself.

/"He was with me for most of the fight... Wait! I see him!"/

He had spotted the big guy a little ways away from his position, seemingly crouched over something. The part-time Avenger and full-time vigilante quickly swung his way to the Hulk.

/"Just... be careful, Spidey."/ Steve's cautious warning almost made Peter roll his eyes. He knew the team worried about his easy and unconcerned interactions with Hulk, and he couldn't really fault them. After all, the Hulk was the embodiment of Dr. Banner's uncontrolled anger, and was therefore, dangerous. But Peter's Spidey-sense never went off when he was around the big guy, or rather, it never went off because of the big guy, so Peter didn't worry. He knew though, that Tony was probably already on his way to them, just in case.

He landed beside the hulking giant.

"Hey buddy! You okay? Something wrong?"

The Hulk looked at him, and then slowly turned, so that Peter was able to see what was before him. The teenaged vigilante paled behind the mask.

On the ground before them laid the remains of what must have been a carton box. One of the pieces was large enough to read the handwritten 'Free to a good home', scribbled on it. Some of the carton pieces were drenched in red. And tiny bones could be seen among them.

Hulk's grumbling voice thankfully pulled him away from the grizzly scene.

"The evil mice were eating them... Hulk was too late to save the others."

Then Hulk turned further, and revealed a small, softly mewling kitten in his palm. The giant, green hand, made the little kitten look even tinier than it probably was. And Peter's heart just melted.

"I'm really sorry, bud, but you managed to safe this one! That's great! You are a hero! Do you mind if I took it for a minute? Make sure it isn't hurt anywhere?"

The Hulk grunted his agreement, and with a gentleness few would ever associate with the big guy, handed the little kitten over. Neither of the two turned around when Iron Man landed just a couple of steps behind them.

"Hey there, big guy. Spidey. You both good? You know, because you might want to let the team know that you are both good. So that the team doesn't worry."

Instead of answering his adoptive father, Peter addressed Hulk.

"She looks fine to me. But we might want to let a doctor check up on her. Just to make sure nothing is broken."

He placed the little kitten carefully back into his green friend's big hand, and the little fluff ball immediately curled up and started purring. Peter pat Hulk's shoulder in congratulation.

"She likes you!"

Iron Man had come closer.

 "Is that a cat?"

Hulk smiled.

"Hulk likes her, too. She is tiny... Like Bug-boy. Hulk likes Bug-boy."

"You know, big guy, I don't even mind you calling me that. I like you, too."

 "No, seriously, where did the cat come from?"

"Puny Banner is a doctor."

"Well, I was thinking more along the line of a veterinarian, but Bruce should be able to tell if anything was wrong with her. Especially with the equipment at the tower. And if all else fails, there is still Helen. She is the best doctor ever."

 "Okay, one, Bruce would throw in that he is 'not that kind of doctor', right about now. And two, what is the deal with the cat?"

Hulk grunted.

"Hulk will go now. So that puny Banner can take care of her. Bug-boy tell puny Banner that Hulk is keeping her."

Peter nodded enthusiastically.

"Great! What do you want to name her?"

 "Am I invisible to you people? What the hell is the deal with the cat?"

Hulk looked down at the purring kitten in his palm, a thoughtful look on his face.

"Little Smash."

Peter grinned.

"That's a great name!"

 "Seriously, am I invisible? Did I die without noticing and am roaming the streets as a ghost now? Were those rats magic? Is this a curse?"

When the Hulk shrank back into his other half, Bruce found himself even more confused than he usually was after a transformation. Beside him, Peter, in his Spiderman suit, was trying to calm down a comically panicking Tony, who was still in his Iron Man armor, and apparently convinced that he had been turned into an astral projection of himself.

He was standing in the middle of a street in Brooklyn (in only his thankfully very stretchy pants), there were big, twitching web cocoons some feet away from them on the ground, and in his hands was a sleeping little kitten, purring up a storm.

Peter paused long enough from reassuring Tony that he was, indeed, both visible and audible, and definitely not a ghost, to quickly address the confused Bruce.

"That's Little Smash! She is Hulk's! He said to take good care of her! Oh, and she might need an x-ray."

Then he was back at pointedly not ignoring Tony.

Bruce looked down at the sleeping kitten in his hands and sighed.

Oh well,... at least she was cute.

[coin-river-blog]

2018 was something, and here’s to 2019 (hopefully) being something else.

It's New Year's Eve, and everyone is getting ready to start anew in 2019. Just because we're about to leave 2018 in the past doesn't mean we have to forget (even if we desperately want to) everything that happened this year in crypto and blockchain news. That's why ETHNews is here with a roundup of some of the less truly impactful, maybe a little less philosophically relevant, but nonetheless tantalizing stories of 2018's crypto pop-culture takeover.

Not a Subhead

We'll start just a couple of months back to help prevent any time-travel-induced vertigo. In October, it was reported that Elon Musk's Boring Company, an infrastructure and tunneling firm managed by Musk himself, was accepting bitcoin, bitcoin cash, Ether, and Litecoin as payment for the company's "Not a Flamethrower."

Turns out those reports were false, and the whole internet had been duped by a fake Boring Company domain that showed the flamethrower that's not a flamethrower being purchased using cryptocurrencies through a Coinbase extension.

I know the cryptospace is a hotbed for metaphors, but there's something about cryptocurrencies, flamethrowers, and internet trickery that feels way too on the nose.

This wasn't even the first time in 2018 that Musk's name was involved in cryptocurrency drama. In July, Musk tweeted about Twitter accounts impersonating him and running Ethereum scams, which prompted a response from Vitalik Buterin, who asked Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey to "help us please." By the end of July, Twitter purged all Musk, John McAfee, Bill Gates, and Roger Ver impersonator accounts.

Unfortunately, that also meant we lost a lot of great Musk Twitter parody accounts, too. RIP, French and Italian Elon Musk Twitter accounts.

I Only Read It for the Crypto Articles

Way back in March, Vice Industry, an adult entertainment company, tweeted about its partnership with Playboy and Playboy TV, the magazine's television channel. The plan was to allow customers to use cryptocurrencies, starting with the Vice Industry Token, to pay for exclusive Playboy content.

Like most things in the cryptospace, it didn't turn out to be that simple. By August, the Los Angeles Times reported that Playboy Enterprises had filed a lawsuit against the Canadian company Global Blockchain Technologies (GBT), which had been tasked with integrating cryptocurrency payment systems on Playboy's media sites. Playboy Enterprises claimed GBT had failed to fulfill the requirements and hadn't paid the $4 million it promised in their agreement.

I guess you could say everyone was feeling a little bit blue.

I'll be here all week.

Bitcoin Bummer

I'll be the first to say it: Bitcoin is dead. I know it's controversial, but my middle name is Hot Take, and I stand by my parents' strange decision.

What's that now? I'm not the first to say it? Bitcoin died 91 times in 2018, according to 99Bitcoins?

Well, I'll be damned.

Yes, bitcoin died 91 times in 2018, which is relatively far off from its 125 deaths in 2017. There's a lesson to be learned here, and again, I'll be the first to say it: What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Despite early predictions that bitcoin would crash this year, proclamations that the fad was over, and warnings that it had left the tracks – despite all of that, bitcoin's heart is still beating away, alive and well.

What's that now? ETHNews covered this year's hard fork and wrote a great article about the harsh reality of this crypto winter?

Well, I'm new here, okay, can I catch a break?

Coin-be Bryant

TRON founder Justin Sun announced on Twitter in November that NBA legend Kobe Bryant would be attending niTROn, the company's blockchain conference, this coming January 2019. The niTROn site also lists Bryant as a celebrity speaker.

What exactly Bryant will be speaking about is still up for debate. The site lists entrepreneurship under his name, and Bryant has made quite a name for himself in the investment world. Surely it won't be any worse than Bill Clinton's rousing keynote speech at Ripple's Swell conference, an announcement Vitalik Buterin questioned when the news broke.

Now that I think about it, maybe Bryant wasn't a ball hog at all. He was just an early adopter of the #hodl mindset.

Mr. ERC305

In April, Pitbull tried to save music.

Let me explain. Pitbull, Mr. Worldwide, Mr. 305, whatever you want to call him, announced his Smackathon project. The event sought to "decentralize the music industry" by holding a monthlong coding competition designed around "teams who can use the Ethereum platform to disrupt the current state of the music industry, bringing blockchain and music together."

Then the unimaginable happened: something positive. In July, 10 Smackathon finalists presented their projects to a panel of judges that included Pitbull. In the end, Singapore-based HyperValence was awarded first place for its crowdfunding platform that allows fans to support emerging artists by buying ERC721-compliant collectible tokens.

I guess the jury's still out on if and how this will save the music industry, but let's just end this list on a good note.

From all of us here at ETHNews, we –

808s and Hash Rates

Wait, there's one more! I almost forgot. Kanye West tweeted the word "decentralize" this year. You can figure out what that means on your own.

Okay, for real this time. From all of us here at ETHNews, we hope you have a great New Year's Eve and an even better 2019.

Nicholas Ruggieri studied English with an emphasis in creative writing at the University of Nevada, Reno. When he’s not quoting Vines at anyone who’s willing to listen, you’ll find him listening to too many podcasts, reading too many books, and crocheting too many sweaters for his dogs, RT and Peterman.

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