#as soon as you get out of traction | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

saintobio · 9 months ago

Text

blank canvas. (2)

after offering a painful ultimatum to finally be enough for him, things ultimately get worse as he decides between keeping you or losing you as the only resolution.

pairings. ryōmen sukuna, fem!reader

genre. florist x tattoo artist au, mild angst, opposites attract

tags/warnings. strong language, defloration (kinda), explicit smut, undertones of manipulation and gaslighting, toxic relationship, undertones of cheating

notes. 11.2k wc! thanks for the love on bc1, i didn't expect it to gain traction at all but tyty. last part will come soon, but that will be the final chapter to this mini-series.

part 1 | part 3

The ride back home was uncomfortable.

It wasn’t because you had promised to give yourself to him that night, but rather because his uncharacteristic silence was not what you had expected after delivering your ultimatum. You already proposed a wonderful solution to his needs, so why was he acting like you were the one being ridiculous? This was why you hated it whenever Sukuna chose silence over open communication, as it left you a hard time guessing about what was running through his mind. His expression didn’t offer any clues either, because he did pretty well at concealing his emotions behind a facade of indifference.

When you said you would do it with him, you meant it. But what did he think of it?

The sharp wind cut through your skin, the roar of his motorbike deafening your ears as your boyfriend accelerated his vehicle upon entering the tunnel. The vibrant yellow lights offered a cinematic view, tempting you to imagine yourself embracing the wind with open arms, though you knew better than to do so. Instead, you held onto him tightly, wrapping your arms around his waist and leaning forward as he sped through the empty lane.

It was nearing midnight, and the sparse traffic allowed Sukuna to indulge in one of his habits: riding his bike in the late hours of the night through this particular tunnel and onto the highway. You knew this ritual helped him clear his mind since it offered a rush of danger that sharpened his focus on the road. His choice to take this route tonight also only confirmed to you that he was grappling with internal thoughts. The last time he rode this fast was when your parents made you choose between them and him, slapping it in his face that he was and would never be welcomed in your family.

To be honest, it frightened you. The speed at which he was riding was dangerous for both of you. Moreover, his bike was a YZF-R1, although street-legal, it was still a high-performance sport bike more suited for the track. It required agile and precise handling with its 1000cc engine. Yet, no other vehicle seemed more fitting for Sukuna than this.

Whatever was on his mind, he didn’t care to let you know. You two didn’t really speak throughout the ride while you clung to him like a backpack, praying in your head that you two wouldn’t get into an accident. Thankfully enough, he did safely take you home as you arrived at your shared apartment at exactly midnight.

“Please don’t ride like that again,” you muttered as he helped you out of his motorbike. “You could’ve gotten us killed.”

His fingers then reached to unclasp your helmet, pulling it up to reveal your face. “Well, we’re still alive.”

You looked at his face despite his best effort to avoid yours, standing centimeters apart while he switched off the engine. He didn’t return your gaze as though he was drowned by guilt. Should you speak at this? Or should you let him do it first?

“Baby.” After a minute or so, it was your boyfriend who sighed and finally gave in, pulling you close and resting his forehead against yours. He kept his eyes closed even when he was cupping your cheeks. “You don’t have to do this.”

Yes, you certainly shouldn’t. You didn’t have to do things unwillingly, but that wouldn’t change the fact that this on-going issue was putting a strain on your relationship and this would be your last shot at trying to salvage it. And you couldn’t have him looking for sensual gratification from anyone else other than you, so what other option did you have, really?

“I want to do it.”

“Not if you’re forcing yourself like this.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Who said I’m forcing myself?”

“Your face tells me you are,” replied he, staring at your face in defeat. “So, let’s not—”

“What, and let this issue haunt us over and over?” You smiled bitterly, shaking your head adamantly. “This has to be done. I need to experience it so I’ll finally understand.”

Understand what? His face almost spelled out those words, but he chose not to say anything of the sort and instead leaned in to kiss your forehead. “Alright. I’ll make it memorable.”

— —

Easier said than done, of course. You kept overthinking about whether your performance would be satisfactory to him given that you didn’t have enough experience to learn anything at all, aside from the make out sessions that you did once in a blue moon. Around thirty minutes of your time was spent hyperanalyzing your situation in the shower, while the other half of it was spent doing a little more than your nightly routines. Since Sukuna liked powdery scents, you placed a good effort in applying lavender-scented oil and perfume on every inch of your body. You also shaved any unwanted hair, especially on all the intimate places you knew he would be seeing. And by the time you were done, you stepped out of the bathroom blooming like a fresh flower, wrapped in nothing but a thin towel that hugged your womanly figure.

It didn’t feel right at all. It didn’t feel good knowing that you were preparing yourself like that, when these things should only happen on the first night after your wedding. It didn’t feel great that you were going to lose your virginity to a man who had not even proposed to you. This wasn’t even your honeymoon, but you had to pretend like it was.

Did Sukuna feel the same?

He wasn’t lying in bed when you walked out of the bathroom. Instead, he had just returned from outside—shirtless, wearing his favorite gray sweatpants, and holding a box of condoms and a tube of lube in his hand. It was clear he had made a quick visit to the convenience store nearby and got the essentials for your first night.

Immediately, he eyed your towel-wrapped body with restrained lust, clearing his throat as he walked towards the nightstand. “You look nice.”

Really? Did he really have to make this more awkward than it already was?

“Thank you,” was all you could softly reply. It was funny how he pretended to be busy placing the box and tube above the bedside table instead of lunging at you like a desperate man. But because you wanted to get this over with, you were the one who approached him from behind, wrapping your arms around his waist, and touching the firmness of his abs. For someone who had zero experience, you were definitely trying hard enough and that should please him. “You have to help me out here, my love. Guide me.”

When Sukuna turned around, your heart started racing. Of excitement? Maybe. Of anxiety? Perhaps. He made it better though when he finally caved in and looked straight into your eyes, tucking a few strands of hair behind your ear before lifting your chin with his hand. “You smell extra nice, too,” he added, leaning close enough that you could feel his warm breath fanning your face.

You were feeling it now. The equal lust. The carnal desire. The feeling of his sweet kisses, which he made true as soon as he crashed his lips onto yours. His kisses usually ranged from tender to rough, but this time, it was an altogether different type of kiss. It was passionate and demonstrative, as if showing you exactly what he had been wanting to do to you the first time you got together. This must be the result of being celibate in over a year. He was clearly a man deprived of sexual pleasure, and you were responsible for it. You actually turned him into a monk.

Now, he wasn’t holding anything back anymore. With his hand on your nape, he deepened the kiss to the point where you could feel his tongue exploring your mouth. You followed whatever he was doing like a good girl, like a very good girl, as he completely devoured your mouth with his. It didn’t take long for him to advance his kisses in other places too, being your jawline his next target, and then your neck as he feathered kisses around the soft flesh, leaving marks that would need a few days to be concealed.

Because his arms were tight around your waist, yours were locked around his neck. Where else should you be putting them? What does the girl usually do in this situation? You tried not to think much of it and listened to your own body while your boyfriend was sucking the skin around your collarbone. At first, your hand traced his toned chest, then it moved southwards to feel his abs, and further down to his…

“Y-You’re hard.” Your eyes widened as you felt his growing erection behind the fabric of his sweatpants. It wasn’t your first time seeing his boner, but it was the first time you touched it with your own hand. It was the first time you had your palm stroking his length, swallowing hard as you realized just how hard and thick he was.

“It wants to be inside you,” he whispered through your mouth, kissing you back again, “so bad, baby.”

Gosh. Your knees felt weak and you two hadn’t even really started yet. How much more when he starts putting that thing of his inside you? You were breathing hard, trying to catch air as your boyfriend continued to lap his tongue with yours, guiding your hand to continue fondling his wood while it grew bigger the more stimulated it got. By letting you touch his hardened crotch together with his own, you realized that you had just unlocked a newfound fetish of yours. “D-Do you… do you think about doing it with me often?”

He bit your lower lip before pulling away, animalistic eyes sending you into an orbit of pleasure. “Do you mean if I touch myself to the thought of you a lot?” he teased, chuckling darkly at the obvious heat on your cheeks. You couldn’t help but feel excited at how vulgar he could be with his words. “I do jack off a lot, angel. And it’s always you in my mind.”

You didn’t even have the time to melt from his words, because before you knew it, he was already peeling the towel off your body to reveal your completely naked figure. Obviously, your first reaction was to get shy—with your heated cheeks, your inability to look him in the eyes, your little efforts in covering your breasts and crotch, but he made sure to pull your hands away while keeping his eyes on you. “…Don’t stare.”

Sukuna, however, didn’t listen. His dark eyes scanned every curve of your body, particularly around your chest area before he sighed and threw his head back. “Fuck,” he cussed under his breath. “You’re so fucking sexy. I can’t believe no other punk has seen you like this.”

Your confidence grew little by little because of his praises. “But isn’t that a good thing?”

“For sure.” He almost laughed at his own words, more so in disbelief, before he reached out to touch your bosom. “No one can touch you like this, either, baby.”

“That’s—”

“Hmm?” Your boyfriend smirked at your reaction. While his other hand went to squeeze your breast, the other traveled to your bum, squeezing the cheek with equal fervor. “Can I have a taste of you, baby?”

He fondled your breasts with both hands now, massaging the rounded mass like they were his property. You had to admit to yourself that the feeling of being touched actually transcended your expectations. Or maybe it was only because of how erotic it was, but you couldn’t deny how turned on you were as his veiny, manly hands cupped your bosom.

And as soon as you nodded and permitted him to ‘taste’ you, he took no time in gently pushing you down the mattress, allowing you to lay at a comfortable position under him and his wanton stare. Taste you? He was more like eating you, when he pinned you against the mattress and sucked the skin on your chest. At first, his tongue rolled along your cleavage, inching closer and closer to your right breast while he had his hand squeezing the left. Your body naturally gravitated towards him as you arched your back so he could have better access to your chest. Not only your chest, but also your crotch as he started grinding his clothed manhood in between your folds.

“Mm…”

Sukuna’s mouth was on your breast now, suckling on your flesh and playing his tongue around your nipple. You couldn’t tell if it was pleasurable or painful because his tongue felt ticklish on your skin, but the suction definitely was an entirely different feeling. Both weren’t bad, anyway. They were just new to you. But even if they were foreign, you were curious and all the more interested, studying every little thing he was doing with your body and trying to make mental notes out of it.

Maybe you should have watched porn. That way, you could have been more aware of the step-by-step process of having sex. Who knew there were steps to follow at all? You didn’t think that foreplay could draw this much delay in your session because all you thought was that he was going to insert his cock straight inside you as soon as he saw you naked.

With all the touching, fondling, and kissing… what were you supposed to do? He was doing all the work here.

“Baby,” you spoke softly, staring at the ceiling, “C-Can I… touch you?”

Instead of pulling away, his mouth latched onto your left boob, giving it the same attention before moving south. “Not yet.”

When he said that, you didn’t expect his hand to land on your crotch. Your heart was thumping at an irregular rhythm as you felt his fingers moving in circles around your bud, playing with your clit before spreading your folds apart. “Nghh—!” you let out an embarrassingly loud moan, eyes widening at the sound of your voice, but your boyfriend shushed you by placing a peck on your lips before spreading your legs into a V.

“You’re so wet,” he said, pointing out the obvious as he positioned himself in between your legs, spreading your labia to reveal your entrance. Something about the situation made you increasingly self-conscious, but his undeniably hungry gaze kept you from covering your most sensitive area. It seemed like he was enjoying the sight of your pussy, especially with how wet and ‘untouched’ it was. “Your pussy’s so pretty, baby,” he mumbled, lowering his face closer to the area, “Can’t wait to put my dick inside it.”

You whimpered at the feeling of his tongue in between your folds. No, you couldn’t even think straight after he started teasing your vagina, alternating between flicking his tongue around your bud to french kissing your entrance. His tongue was so deep in your cavern that you were raising your hips involuntarily, going insane from the pleasure it sent your body. Your hands even gripped the sheets and your back arched into a C as you held back from moaning like a wild animal. At some point, the slurping sounds and the feeling of his mouth kissing your vagina had your legs shaking.

Though, you could ask yourself: what turned you on the most? Was it him actually eating your pussy or just the idea of him doing it?

And just when you thought he was done, he replaced his mouth by inserting a finger inside your cunt, garnering a much louder whimper out of you. “B-Baby!”

“Does it hurt?” he asked, eyes locked with yours as he slowly moved his middle finger in and out. “It’s so tight.”

“It hurts…” You nodded, feeling his finger moving in circles inside your cunt as though he was trying to get a feel of your walls, measuring the tightness and such.

He kissed you for a good minute. “Relax, angel. Don’t clench too much.”

Clench? You didn’t even know you were doing such a thing. “How to…?”

“Just relax.” Sukuna placed a hand on your abdomen, pressing it down while he was inserting yet another finger inside of you. “This’ll help you prepare so it won’t hurt as much later.”

Now, you were goddamn nervous. What did he mean it wouldn’t hurt as much? Because you were overthinking the pain of having him his actual cock inside of you. If you couldn’t even bear having his two fingers inside you, how much more with his clearly thick shaft? It was ridiculous to feel both anxious and yet aroused at the same time. Anxious, because you knew he could rip you open. Aroused, because his fingers were currently doing a great job at hitting your most sensitive spot. Whatever it was that he was reaching, it was certainly sending waves of ecstasy throughout your body.

His fingers continued to move. In. Out. In. Out. In. Out. Around. When he pulled his digits out, he sucked the juices on them, tasting every drip of your essence from his fingers. “Sweet.”

Were you? You started to get curious at how he tasted, too. Sweet? Salty? Bitter? You seemed to be moving on autopilot when you pulled yourself up and sat in bed on your knees. “Your turn?”

You asked the question as if you knew what you were doing, which was why Sukuna found it adorable and humorous at the same time. He did help you pull down the sweatpants that had been covering his erection for what felt like eternity, only to reveal a monstrous size that sprung out of the garment.

Holy fuck was all you could say.

He stood at the edge of the bed, a devilish smirk displayed on his saintly face as he saw the length of his cock compared to your face. You obviously hadn’t seen many cocks in your lifetime to be able to compare his size, but in your eyes, he was definitely big. He was girthy. He was lengthy. He was veiny. Meaty.

“Wanna suck it for me, baby?” he encouraged, pumping his shaft while looking at you. Fuck. “Open your mouth.”

You did as told, wrapping a hand at the base of his length while placing his tip on your mouth. You pressed your tongue flat on the surface of his tip, rolling your tongue around the head as if it were a lollipop. Was that what you were supposed to do?

“Eyes on me.” His voice deepened an octave. And it was also raspier.

Why did he want you to look up at him? It was already embarrassing.

“I said, eyes on me, angel.” He grabbed your chin and forced you to lock eyes with his darkened ones. Damn. No wonder girls were desperate to see him in his shop every single day. This was probably what they had been daydreaming about. “Suck my cock.”

In your head, you became a slut. In reality, you were still a shy, inexperienced virgin who didn’t know what to do. You relied on his instructions and looked at his expressions to know if you were doing a good job and to see what he liked and didn’t like. He definitely liked it when you sucked the head, liked it even more when you started to let him go deeper in your mouth, and surely liked it a hell lot better when you gagged after his cock hit the back of your throat. But in spite of the string of saliva that left your mouth after gagging from his cock, his arousal only grew harder, this time holding your hair in his fist as he began thrusting his hip forward. You were bobbing your head at a rhythm that satisfied him, feeling the stretch on your scalp as he tightened his grip on your hair.

“Tighten your mouth around it,” he instructed, fucking your mouth senselessly like hitting your throat was driving him nuts. Your eyes were already filling up with tears because of your urge to gag again, but you didn’t think it would be a good idea to stop now while he was just starting to pleasure himself.

This was the first time in your life to give someone a blowjob, and you weren’t sure what to make of that experience. It personally didn’t give you pleasure, but you liked hearing his desperate moans. You liked hearing him curse and get vulgar with his words. You liked seeing him get rough. His taste, on the other hand, was somewhat a different experience. Since you were only sucking his flesh, it was a tad bit salty at first contact but didn’t taste anything much after tongue got used to the skin around his shaft. Perhaps his cum would have a stronger flavor, though it looked like he had no plans in releasing his load into your mouth as he pulled his member out.

“Fuck it,” he grunted, gently pushing you back and spreading your legs wide open again, “I wanna feel your pussy so bad. Can I fuck you raw, babe?”

All those condoms, and he wanted to have you raw?

“But… I don’t wanna get pregnant.”

His face was full of assurance, shaking his head and denying any chance of knocking you up. “You won’t be. I’ll pull out, I just… I have to feel you raw the first time. I have to.”

“Okay…”

You were nervous as hell. You had butterflies in your stomach, your heart pounding in your chest like a drumbeat you couldn’t silence. You had imagined this moment countless times, but now that it was here, the reality of it was too overwhelming. Your mind yet again raced with a whirlwind of doubts and insecurities, and every nerve on your body seemed to be on high alert while you watched him getting occupied with rubbing his entire length with lube, ensuring a smooth entrance inside you.

He was nervous too, right? You couldn’t be the only one. You couldn’t be.

You just wanted everything to be perfect. To show him how much you cared. To feel that you were enough. But the thought was paralyzing. Tonight was more than just physical intimacy; it was a step forward in your relationship, a moment of connection you wanted so badly to cherish. This first intimate encounter should be filled with love, respect, and mutual understanding.

But what if after this, he’d come to realize that you weren’t the one? What if he’d get disappointed and tell you that you weren’t worth it? What if he’d leave you for someone else who could pleasure him better? What if, after you had given yourself to him, no one else would ever appreciate you anymore?

You wanted this, didn’t you? You wanted to feel the heat of his touch, the intensity of his gaze, the intimacy of your connection. You wanted to explore this uncharted territory with him, to dive headfirst into the unknown and discover what lay on the other side. But were you really ready for this? Did you truly want this? Would it be everything you had imagined, or would you regret losing your virginity to him?

The fear of inadequacy gnawed at your confidence as Sukuna positioned himself back in between you, his tip rubbing at your slit a couple times before he finally sunk it into your entrance.

“Haaa—!”

“Shh. It’s okay, it’s gonna be okay.”

“N-No, I—!”

It felt like your walls were being stretched so painfully, like your flesh was being torn open in the most agonizing way. This was not the kind of pain you pictured out when he put his member inside. Sukuna even tried to grab hold of your hips to keep you steady, but you were withdrawing your hips back, wanting nothing but for him to remove his cock.

“It hurts… It hurts… please, stop. Please!”

“Baby, I’m trying to be gentle—”

“I SAID STOP!”

Both of your eyes widened at the same time, and that was the only time you two were ever in sync. He was clearly shocked by your outburst, while you yourself were surprised at how you raised your voice at him. Neither of you expected that situation. As a result, he did pull away and completely withdrew himself from you.

Frustration was evident on his visage and he couldn’t even hide it anymore. “Fuck this,” he spat in exasperation, taking a deep breath as he reached to slip his sweatpants back on. “I knew it.”

“No, I…” You swallowed. “It just… You kinda forced it, I wasn’t ready.”

“I forced it, really? I forced you?” His laugh was out of complete disbelief. “I never forced you into anything, angel. I’ve asked you since the beginning if this is really what you want.” He took a pause, a very uncomfortable one, before he went on murmuring, “It was just my tip and you’re overreacting like this. I’m not even halfway in.”

His agitation had finally awakened you to your senses, realizing that you did end up doing what you were scared of doing. You ruined the moment. You were so caught up in your bubble of negative thoughts that you had once again failed to fulfill what you were supposed to do. No wonder he was aggravated, now sitting away from you and wearing his clothes as if telling you that he was done. Done being blue balled by his own girlfriend. Done expecting something he was never really bound to have.

You reached out to touch his arm. “Baby, I’m sorry… I just got scared, but we can still—”

“Still do it?” he continued your sentence by ironically cutting you off, “No, the fuck, I won’t. I’m not in the mood anymore.”

His reaction brought tears to your eyes, because the way he was acting stung your fragile heart. You didn’t mean to ruin anything. More importantly, you didn’t wish for everything to just turn out like this. “I-I’m sorry. Let me try again, please.”

The weakness of your voice seemed to have softened him, becoming calmer and more composed after a few minutes of contemplation, but he still held his ground when he massaged his temple and sighed. “Let’s just not push it, Y/N.” He looked at your eyes, with hurt and rejection reflecting on them. “Even if you say you wanna do it, you think I can’t see it in your face that you’re not really into it? You’re never ready for me and maybe it’s my fault, maybe there’s something about me that you’re so scared of. Maybe it’s because you don’t feel secure with me, maybe you wanna save yourself for someone better, someone who can give you a brighter future—”

“That’s not true!” You shook your head desperately, your eyes blurring from the pool of tears while you clung to his arm. Where was all this coming from? It sounded like he had been harboring those feelings for so long. “That’s not true. What are you even saying?”

“I don’t even know what I’m saying. I’m just…” Trying to give a reason why you won’t give it to me. That must be what he had wanted to say. “Look, I don’t wanna pressure you into this bullshit anymore. I don’t wanna make it look like I’m begging for your affection like this. Intimacy should happen normally for couples, and if we can’t have that, then we can’t. That’s it.”

Why did he sound like he was giving up?

You tried to keep your emotions at bay while listening to him battling with his internal thoughts. “I understand I disappointed you tonight, but…”

He was adamant at shaking his head, distancing himself from you by getting up from the bed. “No, you got nothin’ to apologize for. It’s your body and your choice. I’d never force you into anything.”

Then… then…

“I just think it’s not the perfect time,” he continued, shooting you a glance before looking away. Each step he took added another crack on your fragile heart. “From now on, I’m never gonna initiate anything intimate nor will I expect anything from you, aight? I’m over it.”

Alone in your vulnerability, you could feel the cold air hugging your naked body as you watched him walk towards the door, leaving you in the dark both literally and figuratively. “Where a-are you going? Come on… Please.”

He no longer cared to turn around. He no longer bothered to comfort you as he walked away, muttering, “Just gonna go for a ride. Don’t wait on me.”

— —

Nearly three weeks had passed since that night and you would be lying if you said everything was okay.

No, everything was not okay. You could feel the distance growing each day even when you two still did everything together. Your normal routines didn’t feel normal anymore because he was acting too detached ever since he told you that he wouldn’t initiate anything intimate ever again. And to be honest? It hurt. A whole fucking lot. Hearing your partner say that they would never wish to do anything intimate with you was probably the worst way to experience heartbreak. Because he was truthful with it, and he showed it very openly.

Now, he’d lock the door whenever he would take showers. He’d spent most of his time outside riding his bike until midnight. He stopped texting you sweet messages while on tattoo shop duty. He seldomly joined you to eat breakfast and dinner together. His back would face you whenever you two slept in bed. His eyes avoided you even when you walked around in underwear. His hand wouldn’t touch you even when you were centimeters close to him. There were no kisses exchanged either, unless obliged to do so when leaving the house. No hugs. No hair-stroking, hand-holding sweetness ever shared. You were simply cohabiting in your shared apartment like strangers who had barely even said I love you’s.

“Man, that’s rough,” remarked Suguru Getou, your cousin and the barista, as he tidied up the counter behind the elevated bar. Having just served his friend an Americano, he listened intently as you vented about your situation with Sukuna. “I’ll be honest with you, Y/N. It’s not looking good for you.”

You knew that. You just refused to acknowledge it. “I mean, all couples fight.”

Suguru shook his head, however. “You two aren’t even fighting. Dude just gave up and started detaching himself from you. If that’s not a sign already, then I don’t know what is.”

“What sign?” you asked, hiding the obvious worry in your voice. You need not be dense about his words, but you wanted to have some kind of hope to grasp on.

“Sign that he’s falling out of love?” he continued.

And somehow, his white-haired friend thought it would be okay to chime in. “More like a sign that the tool's not interested anymore and is about to dump her.”

Your face felt hot and in the most terrible way. “Sorry, what was your name again?” you asked, your tone dripping with sarcasm. You hadn’t expected the guy to suddenly chime in, considering he had been quietly typing on his laptop just moments before. “I don’t remember asking for your opinion, so don’t go listening to somebody else’s business when you’re not part of the conversation.”

“Jeez,” said the albino guy, grinning at your cousin as if amused by your barrage of a response. “She’s a yapper, too. I thought she was supposed to be this sweet and innocent type, Suguru?”

“Not always.” Suguru chuckled at his friend before turning to you, apologetic eyes now attempting to soothe your nerves. “Sorry ‘bout that, Y/N. Satoru just likes to tease people. Don’t mind him.”

You kept a straight face. “Well, then maybe tell your friend to keep his nose out of conversations he’s not invited to.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Satoru gave you a playful salute before extending his hand towards you. “Look, I didn’t mean to overhear, but I actually sympathize with you. If it were me, I’d never do that to you, baby.”

Oh, God. You were so bad at this. Was he flirting with you or was he simply playful like this?

Nevertheless, you rolled your eyes and ignored the hand he offered, essentially brushing off his advances. “I don’t need sympathy. All I’m here for is to talk to my cousin to try and have his advice on the matter,” you emphasized pointedly, making it clear to Satoru that he was the last person you wanted advice from. “I don’t need a stranger listening to my personal life.”

“Doesn’t hurt to receive advice from another guy,” countered Satoru, shrugging. “Right, Suguru? I mean, we’re both guys. We can give you some insight into how men think.”

You felt the urge to bury your face in your hands. It was clearly a mistake going there and putting yourself in that situation, and now having two guys aware of your sex life with your boyfriend. That alone was so wrong on many levels. But could it be helped? Suguru was your closest cousin, the only one who didn’t turn his back on you after you left your parents’ home. He was working at a cafe three blocks away from your flower shop and you happened to be delivering a batch of fresh floral decorations for their cafe. You obviously found it a good opportunity to open up to him about your struggling relationship and hoped he could offer some male perspective on Sukuna’s behavior. You just hadn’t anticipated his friend eavesdropping on the conversation the entire time.

Well, that should have been expected anyway, since only the three of you were in that cafe on a lazy Wednesday afternoon.

“I don’t kiss and tell, by the way.” Satoru was beaming as he gave you that assurance and you couldn’t help but admit that the man had some charm in him. He was attractive, no doubt about it. He was also tall, toned, and seemingly well off based on the way he dressed. He had a casual yet preppy style, something you would normally see from guys who went to private school.

“Do you work?” you asked out of sheer curiosity. “You don’t seem like the type.”

“Oh, now she’s interested.” Satoru seemed to have found your sudden interest in him humorous. “I’m finishing my MBA, miss. Thank you for asking.”

“He’s a privileged rich kid with generational wealth and a family business,” Suguru remarked, playfully gesturing a cutting motion across his neck. “Definitely not your type, huh, Y/N?”

“Why, what’s her type?” The white-haired man looked intrigued, pulling his stool closer. He had that stupid grin on his face as though the topic just sparked his curiosity. “What’s her boyfriend like?”

Suguru, who wanted to play along, jokingly hummed in deep thought. “He’s got tattoos, likes to tattoo other people, is a college dropout, rides a big bike, smokes and drinks, listens to heavy metal, was probably a delinquent and a juvie alumni—”

“Excuse you, he’s never been in a juvenile detention center,” you defended your man, feeling like your cousin’s categorization of Sukuna was becoming a little too derogatory and you had to correct him for that, “and he’s a good man. He’s sweet and caring, he’s passionate, and he loves me sincerely.”

“Sincerely, not?” Satoru quipped, earning your glare in return. He immediately raised his hands in surrender. “I'm just joking. If you believe he’s all that, that’s your choice. I don’t judge booktok girls who romanticize typical bad boys.”

You rolled your eyes at his audacity. Each word that left his mouth seemed to stoke the flames of your irritation. “You’re so offensive, I’ll have you know that.”

The white-haired guy smugly took a sip from his coffee. “At least I don’t make girls feel guilty for not having sex with me.”

“Oooh.” Suguru was clearly enjoying the show, unaware that you were one step closer from smacking his friend across the face. “Touché. He kinda has a point, Y/N.”

“Be serious,” you warned.

To which he agreed to. “Okay, I am being serious now,” he said, abandoning his playful stance to lean in on a more solemn posture against the counter, “If you think Sukuna makes you feel guilty for not doing it with him, then shouldn’t that speak for the kind of relationship you two have? He wants something you can’t give. His reaction tells you everything you need to know about him.”

You tried to absorb his words with a better understanding and without any bias. “Isn’t his reaction normal? He’s a man, too. I understand his needs and I made him feel somewhat rejected.”

“It’s all about respect, Y/N,” answered Suguru, “If he’s a decent man, he wouldn’t make you feel that way. No mixed signals, no guilt tripping, no nothing. If you can’t do it, then don’t.”

“So, you’re saying you wouldn’t feel the same if your girlfriend keeps rejecting sex with you?”

Suguru smirked. “I never said I’m a decent man, either. All I’m saying is if what you want isn’t exactly aligned to what he wants, then maybe it’s best you break it off with him because this shit won’t get you anywhere, Y/N. Trust me. He’s gonna dump you before you know it. I mean, it’s one thing to pretend he’s all fine with it, and it’s another to distance himself from you like he’s silently protesting.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” Satoru joined in once again. “It’s impossible for a guy like that to be in a relationship for so long and not have any pussy. We think of sex 24/7, some of us are just better at restraining ourselves than others. He’s putting up with it now, but it’s only a matter of time he gets sick and tired of waiting. You do realize he can get any girl he wants, anytime he wants, right?”

Although you were still uncomfortable at Satoru casually chiming in on the conversation, it was true when they said they could give you the exact male perspective you needed to hear. This allowed you to go deeper into Sukuna’s psyche and understand why he was acting that way. You just didn’t know how to save the connection you have with your boyfriend when both your cousin and his friend were describing all the red flags on Sukuna’s behavior.

“I don’t know,” you spoke in a tone of defeat. “I kinda understand where he’s coming from, so I can’t just leave him for it. I love him.”

Satoru looked at your cousin like you couldn’t be saved. “She’s in too deep.”

“Yeah, gaslighted as fuck.” Suguru was shaking his head in disappointment.

The taller man chuckled and brought up a ridiculous offer to lighten the situation up. “Honestly, Y/N. I know we just met and all, but if you ever need someone to teach you how to do good in bed, just hit me up. He’ll never know.”

“Shut up,” you shot back at Satoru, eyes rolling at his remark.

“You’re out here feeling bad for that guy when he could be fucking his clients at the tattoo shop.”

You argued. “No, he’s not—”

“Are you sure he isn’t?”

It wasn’t Suguru nor Satoru who posed that question; it was Yuki Tsukumo, the café’s manager and Suguru's respected senior. She was in a relationship with one of your boyfriend’s stepbrothers, Choso, and was also a fellow biker, which allowed her to cross paths with Sukuna in their community. Despite this connection, she was never particularly close to him. In fact, Yuki didn’t personally get along with Sukuna and she was very vocal about it. She was, however, a regular client of yours and ordered floral arrangements from your shop on a weekly basis.

It had been awhile since you last saw her, and didn’t expect that the first greeting you would give her was a question. “Yuki, what do you mean?”

Great. Now, three people know about your relationship quagmires.

She was placing her helmet at the counter and sitting on a stool before answering you, “I really think you should talk to him about it, Y/N.”

No, no. Why did you suddenly feel a pang of anxiety out of nowhere? Something about the sympathy in Yuki’s eyes felt unsettling, and it sent a wave of fear through you. She definitely knew something. What was Sukuna doing behind your back?

“Can you please just tell me?”

Her gaze studied your face intently, as if deliberating on the right thing to do. “Well... I spotted him riding with a girl the other night. Initially, I thought it might be you, but last night, I saw them together again. I recognized her... because it was his ex. I think he’s been giving her rides home lately.”

Amidst the quiet of the room, your heart felt like it was breaking in two. The sudden revelation sent you into an abyss of pain.

“You might wanna visit his tattoo shop later.” Yuki encouraged me with a comforting smile. “It may be best to confront him about it.”

— —

Sukuna wasn’t sure how to act around you anymore. It wasn’t like he was purposely avoiding you, but he just didn’t feel comfortable acting like everything was fine and dandy. Because if he was damn honest, the sexual frustration was fucking with his head. So much so to the point where he started questioning himself if he should still put up with a relationship like this.

First of all, there were pros and cons involved. He had to consider that it was a special connection filled with special memories, too.

If he was talking about the pros, he knew he would have a loving lifetime partner with you. You were beautiful, kind, and pure. You inspired him and motivated him to be better. You were unmaterialistic and happy with the littlest things. You gave his dominant side the urge to be a better man, like he was made to protect and provide for you. You became his muse; a blank canvas that was all for him to paint on. A canvas that no one had ever touched. Or, in your world, a white lily that was associated with chastity and virtue.

But then, there were also cons, and the foremost of it being you were too conservative for your own good. You grew up in a strict environment with uptight parents who wanted to control your life. He could never voice it out, but he really hated that you were square like your parents sometimes. You were too traditional and afraid to explore new experiences, oftentimes policing him for living his life as free as he wanted it to be. The ‘opposites attract’ thing did seem to work in your relationship at first, with your differences being exciting for each other, but as time went by, it became clearer to him that you two were too different to actually be in sync together.

Hence why your relationship became rigid and suffocating, forcing him to take a breather by distancing himself from you for some time. He did this for your benefit, because he had to clear his head before risking losing you for good. He didn’t want to jeopardize a relationship that he knew meant the world to him. Perhaps this was just a phase, a challenging period following the honeymoon phase, where all your differences seemed to become more pronounced.

But to repeatedly make him look forward to sharing intimacy with you, only for you to back out at the very last minute? Man, was that so frustrating.

It didn’t help that it was destiny itself that seemed to be stirring the pot. Because while you two were going through a rough time in your relationship, the irony presented itself outside of Sukuna’s tattoo shop late at night just as he was about to close.

“Ryo?” A tall woman with athletic build, long dark hair, and beautiful doe eyes came into view with a wide smile on her face.

His ex-girlfriend of three years.

Sukuna held the door for her albeit the confusion in his eyes. “Yorozu?”

The only difference he noticed was that she had become a lot sexier, with the curves on her body more womanly than ever. It was obvious that she was active in the gym to achieve such a fit physique. But other than that, her facial features were the same. Her heart eyes still shone bright at the mere sight of him, as if they carried stars and galaxies.

“I think I came too late,” said Yorozu, smiling in disappointment, “I should probably just return tomorrow.”

“No, you’re good.” Sukuna insisted on letting her enter his shop, closing the door as soon as she was inside. “What brought you here?”

She stood confidently in front him, wearing nothing but a blank tank top and some loose white pants. “Funny story ‘cause I actually just moved to this city recently and I just found out you had a shop in this area.”

Oh? That was interesting, indeed. Sukuna wondered how she even found his shop in that case, while he was leading her to the tattoo chair. “Are you here to get a tattoo or?”

“Yeah, yeah I am.” She was sprinkling some charm in her grin. He knew her too well. “I think it’s amazing that I’m gonna get it from you again.”

While Yorozu was talking to him, he couldn’t help but ask: was it wrong for him to be in the same vicinity as his ex? Considering how jealous you could get, this was definitely wrong in your eyes. But as he wasn’t doing anything sketchy, he figured there was nothing wrong about what he was doing. Yorozu was technically a client and he couldn’t deny her his services since she was basically a friend of his, too. So, was he breaking any code here?

“Well, only if you have time now, of course,” she added out of consideration, “It’s kinda late so I can always come back.”

Sukuna shook his head and headed to get his book of tattoo art samples. “It’s fine. I got clients lined up all day tomorrow, so,” he said, placing the book on her lap, “You wanna check that or do you have a design in mind already?”

Yorozu’s eyes fell on the tattoos marking Sukuna’s body, her gaze landing on every familiar inch as though she had seen them all the time before. It was true. She had seen more of him, actually. She had done more with his body, too. “I kinda wanna get a sleeve, but I want you to choose the design for me.”

A tattoo sleeve? Damn. It was something he would never in a million years see from you, but for Yorozu, it was totally normal. She was as obsessed with ink as he was. And although she’s had a couple of tattoos in her body already, which were done by him, it would be her first time to get a full sleeve.

“I get to choose, really?” Sukuna chuckled lightly. If he were to think of Yorozu’s traits, she was definitely a classic red rose. A seductress, alluring woman was how he saw her and the said flower would be a true-to-life representation of her personality. She was passionate when it came to loving someone, and was completely devoted to him back when they were together. The only reason they broke up was because they were too similar, as if she was his counterpart, and he saw fit to leave a relationship where they both constantly battled for dominance. Yorozu could get too aggressive on loving someone and he didn’t particularly like that. He made her understand why they weren’t working as a couple, and it took her some time, but she eventually accepted his decision. Now, you could say, they were somehow on good terms. “Alright, I’ll do your sleeve, but I’ll keep the design as a surprise.”

Her eyes sparkled in excitement at the thought. “I’d love that!”

“Since you want a sleeve, we’re gonna do some stencil application today.” Sukuna didn’t waste any more time in getting ready with his equipment, biting on the glove while wearing the other on his hand. “It’ll take fifteen to twenty hours to complete a sleeve, and each session could last two to six hours depending on your pain tolerance. My schedule’s actually full all day until next week, but you can come around the same time every night so I can finish yours.”

“Yeah, I’m absolutely fine with that,” she enthused. For some reason, Yorozu was happy with the idea. The idea of coming to visit Sukuna every night in his shop. The idea that they get to be alone. The idea that they would be able to reconnect just like old times. Those were the things that Sukuna assumed was going through her head.

And as he did start with his ‘client’, it was probably best to admit that the sexual tension was high. The room felt stuffy as the both of them remained there until midnight, with her sitting on the tattoo chair, and him doing her tattoo to her left. His eyes were intently focused on the intricate patterns he was doing on her arm, but also couldn’t avoid seeing the contours of her breasts since she was wearing such a thin tank top. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen them before. He’d seen every part of her body from her neck down to her toes. He’d put her in every position from missionary to doggy. Goddamn, he could even remember how warm she felt around his cock. Didn’t she like it when he came inside her? Or when he made her swallow every drop of his seed?

Sukuna cleared his throat, shaking his vulgar thoughts away as he continued with Yorozu’s arm. He may not be cheating, but thinking back on those intimate experiences with someone else other than his girlfriend was definitely not morally right either. But what sexual experience could he reminisce about with you? That ridiculously embarrassing night you two had shouldn’t even be counted since he was trying so hard to forget about it.

He cleared his throat. Again. For the third time. “What, uh, what’ve you been up to?”

Yorozu, who had no clue about his thoughts, turned her face to look at him happily. “Not much, actually. The bar I worked at closed down, but I got myself a new job in this club as a full time hostess and part-time promoter. You should come by. Drinks on me.”

By not exactly accepting or refusing, Sukuna decided to just smile it off. “That’s why you moved to this city?”

“Yeah, I mean… obviously, the rent here is higher, but it’s closer to my job. I get paid decently, too.”

“That’s nice.” He was just trying to make small talk at this point. “Do you know your way ‘round here? How are you gonna get home?”

She considered her options. “Probably a bus or something?”

Sukuna paused, contemplating the situation. “There's no bus here at midnight,” he remarked, concerned for the girl who would have to navigate her way home alone at such a late hour. She was new to the area and clearly still adjusting to the commuter lifestyle. Unlike her, he had a vehicle that could safely transport her home. There would be no harm in offering, right? “Look, I have a bike and I usually take midnight rides, anyway. I can drop you off on my way home.”

“Really?” Her voice echoed excitement in them. “I’d appreciate it, Ryo. Thanks so much.”

Life was ironic, truly. He didn’t see this situation coming because he never expected that he would even come across Yorozu ever again. They didn’t have any contact prior, but he still saw her on social media whenever he (on very rare occasions) decided to check his accounts. He never had her blocked, either, which was why you knew about Yorozu after snooping through his phone and reading through some of his old messages with her. Sukuna used to tell you not to worry about her, and that she was just his ex, and that she had nothing on you—which were all true, of course, but it was funny to him now that the woman his girlfriend was most threatened by was back in his life.

And she was riding at the backseat of his motorbike, her arms latching at nothing else but around his torso. She was seated at the seat reserved for you, wearing the helmet that was bought for you, and holding onto a man that was rightfully yours. It all didn’t feel right.

But because Yorozu delighted in his habit of speeding on the highway, he had somehow forgotten about the guilt that was forming in his heart.

“You still have your ex’s Instagram?” Your questioning eyes met his defensive ones as he joined you in the living room, finding his space on the couch next to you. “I read your dms. Why haven’t you blocked her?”

Sukuna’s breath remained steady. “Only toxic people do that shit.”

“But I’m not comfortable with it!” you nagged, letting him snatch his phone from your grasp.

“Do you see me talking to her still?” he asked, trying to be as patient as he could be, “Baby, I don’t even talk to her. I don’t think she’s active there, either.”

You crossed your arms. “Then, block her?”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m being fair. You shouldn’t be keeping tabs with an ex.”

“What are you—” Sukuna decided to cut his own sentence after realizing that the argument was plain stupid. “You know what, I’ll just delete my insta.”

“How many times do you two do it?” you asked out of nowhere, sitting at the waiting area while he was closing his shop. “Your ex. How often do you have sex with her?”

What kind of trap were you setting now? If he told you an honest answer, you would get mad. If he lied or even sugar coated it, you would also get mad.

“Does it matter? Why do you keep asking questions about her and then get upset with me?” Sukuna’s frustration resonated in his sigh as he tidied the space where he tattooed his client a few minutes ago. “She’s an ex for a reason, so get over it.”

He was starting to get annoyed by your never-ending questions about his past experiences, but he knew you were simply coming from a place of no experience. You probably wanted to know what he liked in bed, what pleased him the most, what kept him from wanting more. Was that too much? No. Were you overdoing this entire thing? A little bit.

“Why are you defensive?” you asked softly, still sitting on the couch as you watched him avoid your eyes. “You make me feel so insecure every time.”

He scoffed, shaking his head as he turned around. “I don’t know, baby. If you’re feeling insecure, then do something about it.”

“Thanks so much for the ride, Ryo.”

Yorozu stood by her door, returning the helmet back to him while she kept her eyes locked on his. Her gaze was inviting, tempting him to give in and submit to his carnal desires. Any man would read her intentions the same way; Yorozu stared at him like that because she wanted to invite him to her place. She wanted him to spend the night and do unforgivable things. To remember the passionate exchange they once shared.

But Sukuna wasn’t like that. No, he wasn’t a cheater. “I, uh, gotta get going.”

“Oh…” Disappointment clouded Yorozu’s face. “Okay, then.”

“See you tomorrow?”

“...Alright.”

“Okay.”

“Wait!” Yorozu pulled his arm just as he was heading back to his motorbike. The sudden closeness in their proximity made his heart race fast. He knew what was coming. “I missed you, Ryo.”

He knew what she was about to do next.

And holy fuck did he guess right, as he was taken aback when Yorozu suddenly leaned in to press her lips onto his. Her soft, cherry lips moved desperately to taste his sweet kisses.

But he didn’t return it. Instead, he immediately pushed her away. “Yorozu,” he spoke softly, “I have a girlfriend.”

“You do?” She didn’t need to hide it. He could see the heartbreak on her face.

“Yeah,” Sukuna confirmed, maintaining a more appropriate distance now. “We’ve been together for some time, and I live with her.”

Yorozu tried to maintain her facade of indifference, making it appear as though she was unfazed by his revelation. “That’s... That’s cool,” she said, “I’m sorry for, uh, the kiss.”

Sukuna nodded, “It’s fine. I should’ve told you sooner.”

“You’re alright,” she reassured him, “It's totally my fault. I hope she won’t be upset with you or something.”

Sukuna had no plans to tell you, knowing well the additional turmoil it would bring to your already strained relationship. However, he realized the importance of clarity in his intentions and the need to set boundaries. “We’re just friends. We’ll keep things civil. I’ll finish your tattoo in a couple more sessions, and then we’re done. Sounds fair?”

Yorozu nodded her head with a reluctant smile. “Fair enough.”

— —

5 more days. Her sleeve required five more sessions, and days went by too fast for him to count. He had busied himself with his clients, while you had busied yourself with yours. He couldn’t even spend time with you because his shop took a chunk of his time from him, and even at home, things had become too awkward ever since your unspoken night.

So, in some ways, Yorozu became his routine. She visited his shop for the past four nights and he had taken her home afterwards. She was in absolute love with her rose sleeve and they weren’t even complete yet. He still owed her one last session and told himself that it should also be the last time she should be around him. It wasn’t right and he didn’t want to create another source of argument with you.

And in truth, he certainly felt a little guilty for spending more time with his ex than his own girlfriend. But did he purposely do it? No, it was fate that brought her to his door about a week ago.

In spite of his stubbornness to admit his wrongdoing, he still ended up stopping by the flower market to get you a nice bouquet of white lilies. He knew you could make a prettier bouquet than that, but he thought it would be a perfect opportunity to surprise you with flowers that didn’t exactly come from you. Besides, he had some making up to do.

Later that night, when he returned to your shared home, he found you sitting at the couch seemingly waiting for him to come home. The lights were dimmed and the television was turned off. For some reason, you were wearing outside clothes and had a somber expression on your face, too. That alone caused the loud thumping of his heart.

“Hey,” he greeted, nonetheless, sitting next to you on the couch and kissing your cheek. “Everything okay, baby?”

Your eyes carried sadness in them as you looked at him and searched for answers you couldn’t find. “Where were you?”

Sukuna handed the bouquet over. “Got you flowers.”

You didn’t accept them. Instead, every second seemed to torture you. “Where were you before that?”

“In the shop…?” He didn’t know where to start, but he was definitely scared. “Why? Sorry I’ve been busy lately. I’ll make it up to you, angel.”

“You close your shop at nine,” you pointed out, voice breaking in the middle of your sentence. “Why do you always come home at two in the morning?”

Fuck. Fuck! What should he say? Should he make an excuse for it? Should he say he’d been checking on Yuuji after his shifts? Should he say he’d been riding to other cities to clear his mind? He didn’t fucking know what to say, especially not when you were clearly on the verge of bursting out.

“Answer me!” you cried, finally releasing the bottle out in the open. The tears that welled in your eyes now streamed ceaselessly down your face. “You’re an asshole. I-I hate you! I fucking… you think I don’t know? You think I’m too stupid to know?!”

Sukuna calmly received the fists you had swung on his chest as he tried to grab ahold of your arms. “Baby, I’ll explain everything.”

“No, damn y-you!” The tremor in your voice squeezed his heart in the most painful way because he hated seeing you breaking down in front of him and over him. This wasn’t the first time he had made you cry, but this was the first time he had seen you actually sob like this. “I-I gave myself to you! I left my p-parents for you! And this is what you do to me? You’re cheating on me with your ex?!”

He was desperate to hold you, hug you, cage you in his arms. He wanted to take your pain away. Wipe your tears away. However, you didn’t allow him to touch even a strand on your hair as you kept on pushing him off. Sukuna felt like he was going to lose his mind. “Baby, listen to me please. It’s really not what you think—”

“I don’t care!” you spat, moving away to wipe the tears off your face. “I don’t fucking care! You sleeping with her or not doesn’t change a thing. Don’t you get it? I’ll never be enough for you!” Despite your loud voice, the cracks in her facade only revealed your longing for validation and acceptance, etching into every tear-stained moment you two had shared over the course of your relationship. He watched you, paralyzed by the sight of you breaking down, as you grabbed a luggage you had been hiding behind the couch as if you were ready to leave. “I’ll never be the person you want me to be and staying with you will always remind me of it!”

“No, no, no… Let’s talk.” Sukuna had to suppress his own tears while he tried to reach out for you. “Baby, please. I don’t feel anything for her, or anyone. It’s just you. You are enough for me, baby. I’m sorry, please.”

You, on the other hand, were adamant at your decision. “I can’t stand what you’re doing to me anymore. I don’t like how you make me feel about myself. I hate how you make me question my own choices!” Tears continued to flow, and your voice wavered, transitioning from anger to a more subdued, pained tone. “I hate… I hate that I love you so much, that I lost all my backbone just to make you happy.”

“You don’t need to.” He was feeling more and more miserable now, his heart sore from all the emotions he had seen from you. “Y/N, you don’t need to. I’m sorry, I love you. I love you so fucking much.”

…

“It’s over, Sukuna,” were the last words he could recall hearing before passing out drunk in his bed that afternoon. “We’re done.”

— —

It was your first heartbreak. Your first actual relationship. Your first everything. Surely, people shouldn’t expect you to move on easily, especially not when the subject of your heartache worked across the street from you.

You were a mess. You had cried enough tears after you moved out of his apartment that night, screamed your heart out as you suffered from the pain of loneliness once more. You couldn’t even bear the thought of returning to your parents and hearing them say they told you so, because loving Sukuna was a choice you thought was good for you.

In the end, he was just a poison without any antidote. A toxin without remedy. The most effective solution was to sever all ties to prevent further contamination.

But strangely enough, you hadn’t seen him in his shop ever since that night, either. The tattoo parlor remained closed for more than two weeks without any notice. While a small part of you worried for him, a bigger part of you cared for yourself. He no longer held any importance to your life, and you should let it remain that way.

What you should focus on, instead, was living your life without any trace of him. A life of independence, away from the toxicity of a manipulative man who constantly made you doubt yourself and what you offered. As they say, you have to learn to love yourself first before you can fully learn to love others.

And in your journey of knowing the truth of that saying, a certain white-haired man entered your floral shop on a somber Friday afternoon just as you were arranging preordered bouquets for multiple customers to pick up.

“Hey,” you greeted the man, surprised at his sudden appearance at your shop.

Satoru grinned as he approached you closer. “I’m here to pick up two bouquets.”

“Oh, it was your order?” Your eyes widened. Silly you. Of course, Suguru would order on his friend’s behalf. He wouldn’t even get his girlfriend some flowers, let alone his mother. So this being Satoru’s order made much more sense. “Okay, you got a bouquet of blush peonies and another bouquet of pink tulips, am I correct?”

He smiled handsomely, displaying his set of perfect white teeth while listening to you talk. “Correct.”

“For your mom?” you asked before you made your way to pick up the bouquets, handing them to him carefully.

His response came with a soft, affirmative hum. “Mhm. One for her,” he said, taking only the bouquet of tulips, “The other is for you.”

Oh, no, no, definitely no. You had seen this before and it didn’t go well.

“That’s lovely, but…” You offered a smile. “I’m not taking those peonies.”

Satoru acted innocent, his vibrant blue eyes coruscating under the ambient lights. “But it’s mother’s day.”

You playfully shook your head. “I’m not even a mother.”

“Yes, you are,” he went on teasing, “the mother of my future kids. I like to think in advance, you know.”

Honestly? This man started off with a bad impression on you, but he wasn’t actually so bad. He was an easygoing, happy-go-lucky person who carried positive energy around him. That, and he was decent, too. He was the type of guy your parents would have surely approved of. He was a degree holder like you, even pursuing graduate studies to run a business that was already generating an income that you could only imagine of getting. He was set for life with no uncertainty with what he wanted for his future.

“Satoru?”

He met your gaze. “Yeah?”

“About your offer last time,” you recalled, recalling his earlier jest about teaching you some things in bed, “I think I'd like to take you up on that.”

#sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #sukuna angst #ryomen sukuna x you #ryomen sukuna x reader #sukuna x y/n #jjk x reader #tattoo artist sukuna #biker sukuna #tattoo artist x florist au

4K notes · View notes

frudoo · 2 months ago

Text

It’s always baker!reader or butcher!Simon—which is always delicious, mind you—but I’m not sure I’ve ever seen baker!Simon (correct me if I’m wrong). Fem!Reader.

Baker!Simon who decided to take his therapist’s advice to find a relaxing hobby and taught himself to bake and decorate after retiring from the military.

Baker!Simon who runs a home bakery so he can do what he loves where he loves. Where else could he blast his favorite playlists while creating tasty treats (he’s convinced that listening to Tool truly helps make the goodies taste better)?

Baker!Simon who specializes in intricate desserts—flawless layered cakes lathered in rich buttercream, perfectly piped patterns across the surface. Soft, chewy sugar cookies with royal icing that has a satisfying snap to those who can actually bear to bite into them and ruin his beautiful designs. Smooth, vibrant macarons with a gorgeous rise and creamy ganache filling.

Baker!Simon who gets his traction on Facebook. He sells his goods on Marketplace and is a member of nearly every baking group on the site—and is quite popular amongst the older ladies in the same groups.

Baker!Simon who, as amazing as his baked goods look and taste, cannot take a flattering picture of them to save his life. Because of this, he doesn’t get as much business as he’d like. Apparently, Marketplace shoppers are picky about camera quality, as if that has anything to do with talent or flavor. Even the baking groups he’s in have given him warnings in the past to take clearer photos—the admins backed off as soon as the old ladies found out they were picking on their best boy.

Food Photographer!Reader who stumbles upon one of his groups one day, seeing the potential in his treats and knowing she could help him out with his promotion photos.

Baker!Simon who cocks an eyebrow at the ping his phone alerts him of, opening Messenger to see a pretty thing with a camera in his DMs:

Sorry to bother you, but I’ve gone through your profile and I think your work is absolutely gorgeous. If you’re interested, I’m a trained photographer and I’d like to help you out with your pictures? No charge, don’t worry. Consider it a favor between two small businesses! :)

Part 2 <3

#uh oh #everyone say ‘fru stop making new AUs’#jk send in allllll the asks about him!!!!#call of duty #cod #cod mw2 #simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley #Baker!Simon

2K notes · View notes

acid-ixx · 1 month ago

Text

mea culpa (again &. again mini chapter)

tw: allusions to self harm, depression and suicidal thoughts. sensitive content ahead. this happens in between the end of chapter 3 and start of chapter 4.

if you were to describe the first few years at the manor, the first word that comes to you would be...

well, regret.

at every attempt, at every woeful request, and the rejection that follows. their distant stares, as if looking elsewhere other than you, or the way some wouldn't even acknowledge your name, or presence; it would've devoured anyone else's hope, would've been an already telltale sign that they had no interest in the likes of you.

invitations to spend time with them, to hopefully gain insights about their interests— just for that sliver of desire that somehow, someday you wouldn't have to constantly be on your knees, asking pleases in the sweetest tone a six year old like you could muster to a butler who had more important duties to attend to other than a desperate child wanting to spend time with their family.

when you lose something dear, you begin to desire that very same treasure lost. your mother is no more, her kisses were no more, her lingering touches long since disappeared.

it's only after a few weeks did the grief register within you. only then did the desire to recreate all those soft moments with her manifested into the threshold of your mind; clawing, hungry appendages that disguise itself as innocent ambition ready to hurt you.

all you simply wanted was to meet your father, to see him outside of camera flashes, or in news channels and interviews that only capture one part of him. you wish to see the man idolized by hundreds of civilians for his charitable actions, admired by thousands; a man who you were lucky enough to have as a father.

the very same man who, after having to take you under his care after news about your appearance sparked traction in media— was never in the same room as you.

and if he was? he'd be gone as soon before you could quickly greet him with a hello.

you remember those days, though. the first time where you'd get to pass by your... dad.

a lonesome afternoon, with a storm transpiring outside, the thick gusts of air and heavy rain thumping against the expanse of windows. it was only a quarter to six, yet the scene outside portrayed a sky far darker the shade of blue, and looked almost as if it was midnight. only the dissonant patterns of beating rain guides you to wander around listlessly with nothing to do; bored and delirious after a day of simply being... alone.

but the erratic noises didn't stop you from ceasing in your steps upon the sight of the man, standing in a room and looking out. his silhouette casting against the chandelier's orange light.

it was enough to stumble over, and do a double take at the man in front of you, only a few feet away, before coming closer to his distracted form to further take in his features.

how tall he actually was, towering over your impish, malnutritioned body like a wall. slicked, black hair, some strands loose and freed. his was more intimidating in person. gruff voice you've never once heard on tv, demanding control and respect. thick arms that contrast your sinewy ones, with veins that protruding from jagged skin; all hidded with fancy business suits and a charismatic smile that beckons your eyes to look upon his face instead.

he was handsome in person, more regal than the street thugs you've seen out the windows of your apartment windows. and, for a second, you couldn't believe that this was your father, standing in a room looking as if he could be painted then and there; your fingers buzzing to catch your hands on your sketchbook to draw every detail of the man in question.

your father, your dad, your papa that you've always marveled upon. now standing right before you like a statue concocted by a renaissance artist.

though the most important aspect of your father is his piercing blue eyes. brighter than anything you've seen before, yet duller than the bleak colors of the manor's wallpaper; gazing endlessly outside with no acknowledgement of the way you shake, or how the thumping in your

after one year of begging alfred to see him in person, you get to see him now on such an unannounced day.

yet you're happy all throughout. because he's here now and that's all that matters to the mind of tiny you, gasping and exhilarated to near tears.

fingers shaking, eyes never ripping itself from the man who's stripped you away of all words you wished to say.

it's as if he fits within the gothic setting perfectly. hell, even annunciating its splendor; the sharp edges on his face that are perfectly shadowed by the lack of illuminated, yellowish light, his stiff posture surveying the room, and muscled form speaking volumes of how much he truly acts as a pillar of support for the city.

safe to say his beauty was ethereal.

seeing him up close was far ever a better spectacle. you weren't just enamored; you were in every bit frozen in your stance, burning the memories of your first union with him into every crevice of your mind. dumbfounded, breathless, and buzzing with ecstasy of being face to face with a man your mother must've loved.

after all, he wasn't just one of the kindest souls to bless all of gotham, he was more than that. he was, in most important of details, your father.

a father you haven't seen, nor met, in the first years of your life.

yet those same eyes squint at something, anything else, and never once looked down at you, who modestly tries to pull at his loose house wear to capture his attention after moments you were locked in place. too small, too stubborn and young to understand why his gaze never wandered below and kept to his thoughts instead.

"papa!" you call out to him in a high pitched voice with a wide smile, trying your best to overpower the sound of the raging storm outside. your actions prove fruitless, yet you still attempt to make him snap out of his trance, jumping and shivering in near childish excitement.

and this was all you needed: a single grunt in response was enough to make you all the more feel ecstatic. it washed away your prior somberness at the weather since you're unable to play in the garden, and was replaced with overpowering fulfillment to a single noise he produced.

it never once crossed your mind that the grunt you thought he reciprocated wasn't acknowledgement of your actions.

no, it was merely him seemingly too preoccupied at the thought of his dead son; mind lost, and with no direction to take other than the grief that's still instilled into the pools of his deep, blue eyes.

it never once occurred to you how he hasn't looked down at all, or heard the wispy intonations of your voice blending into the faint, whimsical tune of jazz music that does the least to ease the pain eating away at his chest every time he's given a moment alone to ponder ever-so deeper into his current world of worries.

a world where you don't exist, and you've never once come to realize that until it was too late.

whilst you were busy admiring every side of your father, the good and the bad, you were ignorant to the unforeseen implications of how he never reciprocated the love you've shown him that faithful day; forgotten and buried under lonely silent walls and echoing halls that could only echo a figment of your voice.

when he had left the room and you to find tim, you were left to your own devices once again. yet at that time, you simply bounced with joy and jumped to the nearest couch, allowing the delusions of an improving life shackle you to the deepest of regrets after.

and despite everything, the manor was colder still. and it is cruel and unforgiving to a child like you.

others would've given up, others wouldn't even try so hard after the first failed attempts.

but you? you just weren't them, and you continued trying, one after the other attempt all failing miserably; your first mistake, yet never the last.

it went on like that for 13 and a half years.

these occurrences where you thug at the fabric of the adults roaming around the hallways, only to be ignored or downright rejected. dick broke his promise about visiting your room a second time, but you still chose to bother him every time he comes to visit for anybody but you, tim was no better and preferred to keep his space all for himself; accustomed to the life of a being a single child and preferring it that way, alfred had butler duties, and secret identites he had to tend to every night, and your father was... just that.

thirteen.

an unlucky number in some cultures, a number that was too long when translated in the language of time.

a decade, and nearly a half spent trying and failing. even then, everything you do amounted to nothing. every sweet smile, every baked treats long discarded in the bin, every longing gaze, and effort to set about physical affections for people who were more like strangers to you than family.

strangers under the same roof, living and thriving whilst you wait for admission to be accepted into their comfortable circles and inside joke that raptures from their luminous eyes.

you remember every single moment you had when you were in close proximity with your siblings, and the moments they exactly leave and forget you were even besides them in the first place— quietly humming as if understood that you didn't wish to disturb their presence with yours, but happy enough that they could at least tolerate you.

even if that tolerance stems from the mere fact that you were akin to a ghost in their ever-so busy eyes.

even so, you still remember. young and forgiving, spite a foreign emotion on your tongue, not until you've met the youngest of your lot which would only be after a few years, when you were too late.

you remember the faint elation that courses off through your veins every time alfred promises to get you at least a sliver of meeting bruce again— but even that has barely any updates, you've long since given up the hope that you would see him beyond his busy days.

and you remember it very clearly when dick first introduced you to your room, the sheer brightness that emanates off of your idol, the curls of his hair that flow like ocean waves framing his chiseled face; and his smile, a grin that sports the brightest of teeth, which brings warmth that makes you forget why you were even taken in the first place, replaced with whimsy and giddiness that you get to meet your favorite person in the world, second to your mother.

the way his bright blue eyes contrast with bruce's, seemingly sunnier, more kinder in its approach that makes you drown deeper into the same gaze that forgets you a day after.

and those memories were stored in your heart, both good and bad, kept under lock and key to both haunt and tempt you throughout the entire months you had to deal with the loneliness clawing in your heart.

the pain was surreal every time you reminisce upon the windowsill, watching distantly in the garden that stretches far beyond thick fields of trees, flora and fauna; as tim spends his waking moments with his new group of friends who all praise the colorful array of bloom planted root-deep with love, and care and perseverance— all with soft, vibrant petals and sturdy stems that were a product of your hard-earned labor.

nobody truly acknowledged it was you who planted all those colorful arrays of flowers.

yet you remember everything, or at least recollections of when and how you came to realize just how truly invisible you are to the world.

the hope that flickers within once someone sets their eyes on you, family or friends. the heartbreak that settles within every fiber of pallid skin and sinewy bones every time those eyes leave your form after the slightest of seconds; you remember them all in record time and run to lock yourself in your room to write all these instances in an endless supply of diaries documenting just how miserable you truly are.

no matter if it pains you, and rips at the edges of thinly lined paper stained with black-inked pen writing down your harrowing rants; bleeding into the pages just like how your emotions run deeper than depression and ebbing anxiety.

dates were plastered as both a reminder and punishment for you to reflect upon— on all your wrongs, and ways on how to better yourself so someone, other than alfred, could finally acknowledge you for more than a few seconds.

you remember everything, you were sure of it, but not the first time you purposely drew blood from your skin, or when you contemplated ending it all.

maybe it was all stemming from pressure, or the constant subjection to emotional neglect paired with no support system helping you handle your instability to control your emotions.

or it came after you had first met damian, with your youngest brother threatening you with a damn sword that nicked your skin; making it his mission to torment you consistently your entire life. pushing you down the stairs, calling you and your mother names; a disgrace, mere baggage to the wayne's reputation— even if you glare at him with the slightest bit of bite does he retaliate with an even stronger approach. until you give up, until the fire in your eyes are washed away by the current of dizzying turmoil. until you couldn't even look at him eye-to-eye anymore, ignoring the wide stares he gives you and the way his hands reaches out to you after you run to a different room from his presence alone.

or it all probably fucking started when the lump in your throat had refused to go away, when the heavy boulder you call your heart weighs you down to watch in a corner as yet another member gets introduced into the family, when jealousy raptures and seers into your veins at just how easy...

how easy it is to actually integrate your presence into the wayne family, so why couldn't you?!

a week after you were integrated, it was tim who was welcomed warmly, who fits in so perfectly like a piece of a jigsaw puzzle whilst you were considered an exclusion, an extra who doesn't don a fucking cowl every night, who couldn't in your damn life break every bone and return in one piece, serving as a symbol inspiration for the media to set its eyes upon, and your smile most definitely doesn't brighten the entire room.

you're nothing compared to them.

to try so hard, to fail all the same— as your achievements, your successes and milestones all amount to nothing but heartbroken expectations and a pat of pity from your butler.

the hurt piles, and piles, and piles itself until the colossal infrastructure falls and obliterates around you in its torrid pits of flames and carnage, until glass shards erupt and pierce at your skin until it reaches bones— much like the blades you store and use to butcher skin until it turns into an unintelligible mess of bloodied lines flimsily slashed across the expanse of your body.

like an artwork, a canvas that pictures slaughter in the wake of tragedy. with blood that seeps and stains into the crevices of everything it touches, with you as both the painter and the muse of the chaos you chose to wreck upon yourself.

thick ropes, pill bottles, bottomless water, and sharp blades; they all became topics of interest within the pages of your flabbily designed sketchbook. there was a period of time where all you could do was subjecting each blank slate of ivory sheets with stabs of pencil lead and ruined brushes every time you handle things too roughly. you'd clench into whatever you're holding, and bite at your teeth until it draws blood that drips on grayscale sketches portraying you meeting brutal fates.

and it always ends in your ripping those sketches apart whilst curling in on yourself, pulling at unkempt hair and scratching at hollow, sunken cheeks.

with screams unheard, silent and voiceless through the halls of the manor you once considered a home— like a ghost with no words that come out its mouth, a robot with no voicebox, a doll whose mouth is stitched shut.

it was always silent every night, but the voice of doubt was always louder, and it beckons you to hang yourself, to end your life and to never look back at their wide grins as they spend yet another night together.

it convinces you to write a note for each and every member of the family, to bid them farewell and pass to the world; even if those letters would forego the same fate as you— neglected, stored at the dustiest corners of the room.

you're hurt, both inside and out, alone and deserted with only your thoughts; loud and unforgiving, terrible yet comforting. you feel hurt, at dick's broken promises and sideward glances, jealousy at jason's hold over bruce even after years of his death, spite at tim's brilliance and all the friends who come over at the manor, as if taunting you of his social privileges, and fear for damian to spring up against you, to kill you with his blades and serve your cold body upfront on top of the dinner table.

and you were hurting all the damn time. if not physically, then mentally and emotionally. you allowed the invisible shackles to scar you, trapping you with spikes constantly piercing through your organs. you let yourself be a victim to the past, subjecting yourself to punishment by remembering your mother, sprawled all across the floor in crimson carnage— as you're taken away from her by policemen scouring the area before you could even run to her limp body. it was enough to tempt you to draw sharp object on your skin, condemnation for a life that shouldn't be saved— you would've preferred if your mother lived, rather than you. she had so much more to do with her youthful life, you had nothing.

life was unbearable, you were always teethering on the edge of a cliff suspending in thin air; choosing to run for either hill, holding a string ready to break, for safety always required great risk. one you'd rather jump off of than expend anymore energy of your already weary life altogether—

until you had decided to change the course of your life. until, one day, through gradual thinking and contemplation, that they were the main source of your torment. that you needed to say goodbye, you need to live to honor your mother.

that was the only ideal part of your twisted world. all for your mother, who had sacrificed herself, her kind heart, all to keep you safe and contented.

when you had made the ultimate decision to move out of the manor, throwing away your past life and moving on with a different chapter, you thought your habits would've ceased. that you're cured, that nothing stands in the way of your developing independence and uprising confidence.

you are free, unchained to both the confines of your emotions and the neglect of your family.

happy, content, and living the best of your world despite the financial circumstances and... overdue bills. either way, you're satisfied and that counts. counts for the six-seven months you were away, meeting new friends, ignoring the prying eyes of a certain individual always watching you from afar, as you party and drink and come to only regret not staying sober the day after.

you were at your peak.

feeling the best of all worlds.

at least, not until dick's sudden messages flipped a switch, into a dormant part of your mind, adrenaline surging through your veins, your vision flooded with similar images of your past: of eerie hallways and lonely birthdays. those memories taunt you, and dick's gleaming pair of ocean eyes, that once bring comfort into your oblivious brain now traps you in his spiteful gaze.

and you really, genuinely thought you were no longer in need of anymore pain.

yet you were always wrong. of course you always are.

you're just you, remember?

now, in your current apartment, you stand hidden in the safety of your bathroom, staring at the mirror without thought, with only resignation; unprepared at your family's plans to take you back into their caging arms, but ready for the blade to once again reunite with the familiar lines long healed.

all to wash away your regret.

reblogs, and most especially comments and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.

a/n: sometimes, the pain you bear is too much to handle alone. sometimes, it can manifest through physical means to overpower the anguish that hurts you from within. but that doesn't mean going through the notion is deserved; nobody should ever resort through hurting themselves. when writing this, i was projecting all my emotions into the mc. in truth, as much as i love goofy drabbles, or write for the pleasures of myself and others; that doesn't change any problems i have at all. chronic depression is a pain in the ass. releasing my emotions through writing helps me a lot. and i hope that whoever reads this little drabble know that this is a love letter both to me for how far i've come, and the readers who've supported me with comments and praises that helped me go through the day. i've nothing else to say, i feel indifferent to the draft.

753 notes · View notes

sluttyminghao · 1 month ago

Note

Wearing a mini skirt, but mingyu couldn't stop thinking about bending you over, slide your undies to the side, and fuck you in your mini skirt

you knew exactly what kind of reaction you wanted to get out of mingyu by wearing this tight, red mini skirt. you had planned the perfect outfit for your night out on the town, and you were counting down the seconds until mingyu saw you in your outfit.

as soon as he stepped out of the bathroom in all of his tanned glory, he stops in his tracks. his eyes widen and you can see him devouring each inch of your body with his hungry eyes, basically fucking you without even laying a hand on you.

"do you like my outfit?" your voice is soft as you run your hands down the front of it, smoothing out wrinkles that weren't even there. before you can even look up at him again, he's standing right in front of you, hands on the hem of your stupidly short skirt.

"i do like it, but honestly i would rather see it flipped up while I have you face down on the bed," he mumbles, his hands moving from the hem to under the skirt, to cup at your now soaked panties. you weren't even sure how that happened in that short period of time, but there was no going back now.

without a word spoken between the two of you, you could feel mingyu's large hands maneuver you towards the bed and flip you over, so that you are face to face with the sheets. your ass is perched up just enough that mingyu can get full access to you, and he does.

with a few swift movements, mingyu has your skirt shuffled up your thighs and panties pulled hastily to the side to expose your glistening core to him. he can feel his cock twitch in his hand as he guides himself to you, not even bothering to lube himself up with how much you're dripping.

it doesn't take long for mingyu to adjust to you and start up a steady pace, both his hands on your hips for better traction. you can hear his pleasured grunts and moans and the way he grips your hips has you imagining the pretty bruises you'll see in a few hours.

his cock is reaching places inside you that you didn't even know existed, and you can feel him throbbing with want against your walls. with every thrust, you can feel him begin to falter and speed up, hoping to get you over the edge at the same time as him.

in only a few moments you can feel yourself sliding over the edge into your blissful orgasm, with mingyu following suit only a few thrusts after, with a drawn-out groan of your name. you remain ass up on the bed for a few moments to regain your composure, before you feel mingyu wipe at your thighs with a warm towel.

your panties are pulled back over and mingyu brings you up to stand upright, fixing your miniskirt so that it covers everything again, and he looks at you with a cheeky grin.

"best keep all that cum inside you hm? don't let it drip otherwise everyone will see what a dirty little whore you are"

#sm: masterlist 2024 #sluttyhao smut #sluttyhao scenario #kpop smut #kpop scenario #seventeen smut #seventeen scenario #mingyu smut #mingyu scenario

511 notes · View notes

aces-and-angels · 6 months ago

Text

verification source (no. 175) follow: @amalashuor @moatasim20101010

to my moots/lovely lurkers: if you've been following me for a bit then you may remember my first post i made for amal and her family in late june.

in a short span of time- amal has become a dear friend of mine and her campaign has been able to receive a significant amount of traction thanks to everyone who has continued to share her messages with the world. i'm writing you all today to share amal's latest message to me:

several friends of mine have heard the same sentiment shared by other ghazzans: the rafah crossing may reopen very soon

the targeted attacks within the gaza strip are ramping up- with several massacres being executed by the israeli army in one day. this is a deliberate tactic used to conceal the true extent of their war crimes. families like amal are scrambling to raise enough funds to be able to cross into egypt. with this latest revelation of the border reopening- the time to act has never been more crucial.

so far, amal's family has raised ~44% of their goal (€13,288/€30,000)

please share her campaign as much as possible + donate if you can so they may all get to safety

amal was my inspiration to launch the art campaign boost. because of her, several families have been able to gain more visibility on this platform. please continue to give them all your undivided attention/support.

amal's message:

Hello Can I tell you all the words in my heart? I sent you back because I really need you Here in Gaza, news is spreading that the Rafah crossing will return to work at the end of this month But I did not raise enough money to leave Gaza Please tell the whole world to help me so that the campaign reaches its goal before the end of the month so that I and my family can get out of this extreme danger. Please do everything you can for me💔💔

tagging for reach: @magnus-rhymes-with-swagness @aria-ashryver @ascindio @malcriada @lampyri

@appsa @turian @timetravellingkitty @palms-upturned @riding-with-the-wild-hunt

@mydemonsdrivealimo @monmonp0k @mimibayra @three-croissants @ascindio

@saibug1022 @cadybear420 @thosehallowedhalls @sneakerdoodle @gaiuskamilah

(if y'all can think of more people to tag- @ em)

#moatasim20101010 #amalashuor #not choices #signal bost #🍉#art campaign boost

799 notes · View notes

invisibleicewands · 7 months ago

Text

Please come and see me because I’ll be dead soon’: how Michael Sheen got sucked into a forever chemicals exposé

An opera-loving member of high society turned eco-activist who was forced into police protection with a panic button round his neck. A Hollywood actor who recorded said activist’s life story as he was dying from exposure to the very chemicals he was investigating. Throw in two investigative journalists who realise not everything is as it seems, then uncover some startling truths, and you have “podcasting’s strangest team” on Buried: The Last Witness.

On their award-winning 2023 podcast Buried, the husband and wife duo Dan Ashby and Lucy Taylor dug into illegal toxic waste dumping in the UK and its links to organised crime. This time, they focus on “forever chemicals”, specifically polychlorinated biphenyls (PCBs) and set out to discover whether one whistleblower may have been decades ahead of his time in reporting on their harmful impact.

“It’s amazing how big the scale of this story is,” says Ashby, as we sit backstage at the Crucible theatre, where they are doing a live discussion as part of Sheffield DocFest. “With this series, we don’t just want it to make your blood turn cold, we want it to make you question your own blood itself.”

It all started when Taylor and Ashby were sent a lead about the work of former farmer’s representative Douglas Gowan. In 1967, he discovered a deformed calf in a field and began to investigate strange goings on with animals close to the Brofiscin and Maendy quarries in south Wales. He linked them to the dumping of waste by companies including the nearby Monsanto chemical plant, which was producing PCBs.

PCBs were used in products such as paint and paper to act as a fire retardant, but they were discovered to be harmful and have been banned since 1981 in the UK. However, due to their inability to break down – hence the term forever chemical – Gowan predicted their legacy would be a troubling one. “I expect there to be a raft of chronic illness,” he said. He even claimed that his own exposure to PCBs (a result of years of testing polluted grounds) led his pancreas and immune system to stop working. “I’m a mess and I think it can all be attributed to PCBs,” he said.

However, Gowan wasn’t a typical environmentalist. “A blue-blood high-society Tory and a trained lawyer who could out-Mozart anyone,” is how Taylor describes him in the series. He would even borrow helicopters from friends in high places to travel to investigate farmers’ fields. Gowan died in 2018 but the pair managed to get hold of his life’s work – confidential reports, testing and years of evidence. “I’m interested in environmental heroes that aren’t cliche,” says Ashby. “So I was fascinated by him. But then we started to see his flaws and really had to weigh them up. My goodness it’s a murky world we went into.”

The reason they were able to delve even deeper into this murky world is because of the award-winning actor Michael Sheen who, in 2017, came across Gowan’s work in a story he read. He was so blown away by it, and the lack of broader coverage, that he tracked him down. “I got a message back from him saying: ‘Please come and see me because I’ll be dead soon,’” says Sheen. “I took a camera with me and spent a couple of days with him and just heard this extraordinary story.”

What Gowan had been trying to prove for years gained some traction in 2007, with pieces in the Ecologist and a Guardian article exploring how “Monsanto helped to create one of the most contaminated sites in Britain”. One was described as smelling “of sick when it rains and the small brook that flows from it gushes a vivid orange.” But then momentum stalled.

Years later, in 2023, Ashby and Taylor stumbled on a recording of Sheen giving the 2017 Raymond Williams memorial lecture, which referenced Gowan and his work. Before they knew it, they were in the actor’s kitchen drinking tea and learning he had conducted a life-spanning seven-hour interview with Gowan before his death. So they joined forces. Sheen isn’t just a token celebrity name added for clout on this podcast; he is invested. For him, it’s personal as well as political. “Once you dig into it, you realise there’s a pattern,” he says. “All the places where this seems to have happened are poor working-class areas. There’s a sense that areas like the one I come from are being exploited.”

Sheen even goes to visit some contaminated sites in the series, coming away from one feeling sick. “That made it very real,” he says. “To be looking into a field and going: ‘Well, I’m pretty sure that’s toxic waste.’” Sheen was living a double life of sorts. “I went to rehearsals for a play on Monday and people were like, ‘What did you do this weekend?’” he says. “‘Oh, I went to the most contaminated area in the UK and I think I may be poisoned.’ People thought I was joking.” Sheen ended up being OK, but did have some temporary headaches and nausea, which was a worry. “We literally had to work out if we had poisoned Michael Sheen,” says Ashby, who also ponders in the series: “Have I just killed a national treasure?”

The story gets even knottier. Gowan’s findings turn out to be accurate and prescient, but the narrative around his journey gets muddy. As a character with a flair for drama, he turned his investigation into a juicy, riveting story filled with action, which could not always be corroborated. “If he hadn’t done that, and if he’d been a nerdy, analytical, detail-oriented person who just presented the scientific reports and kept them neatly filed, would we have made this podcast?” asks Taylor, which is a fascinating question that runs through this excellent and gripping series.

Ashby feels that Gowan understood how vital storytelling is when it comes to cutting through the noise. “We have so much science proving the scale of these problems we face and yet we don’t seem to have the stories,” he says. “I think Douglas got that. Fundamentally, he understood that stories motivate human beings to act. But then he went too far.”

However, this is not purely about Gowan’s story – it’s about evidence. The Last Witness doubles up as a groundbreaking investigation into the long-lasting impact of PCBs. “We threw the kitchen sink at this,” says Ashby. “The breakthrough for us is that the Royal Society of Chemistry came on board and funded incredibly expensive testing. So we have this commitment to go after the truth in a way that is hardly ever done.”

From shop-bought fish so toxic that it breaches official health advice to off-the-scale levels of banned chemicals found in British soil, the results are staggering. “The scientist almost fell off his chair,” says Ashby. “That reading is the highest he has ever recorded in soil – in the world. That was the moment we knew Douglas was right and we are now realising the scale of this problem. The public doesn’t realise that even a chemical that has been banned for 40 years is still really present in our environment.”

To go even deeper into just how far PCBs have got into our environment and food chain, Ashby and Taylor had their own blood tested. When Taylor found 80 different types of toxic PCB chemicals in her blood it was a sobering moment. “I was genuinely emotional because it’s so personal,” she says. “It was the thought of this thing being in me that was banned before I was even born and the thought of passing that on to my children.” Ashby adds: “We’ve managed physical risk in our life as journalists in Tanzania and with organised crime, but more scary than a gangster is this invisible threat to our health.”

In order to gauge the magnitude of what overexposure to PCBs can do, they headed to Anniston, Alabama, once home to a Monsanto factory. “As a journalist, you have an inbuilt scepticism and think it can’t be that bad,” says Ashby. “But when I got there I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. I hate to use words like dystopian, but it was. There is a whole massive school that can’t be used. There’s illnesses in children and cancers. It truly was the most powerful vignette of the worst-case example of these chemicals.”

It’s bleak stuff but instilling fear and panic is not the intention. “Obviously, we’re really concerned about it,” says Ashby. “And although the environmental crises we face do feel overwhelming, it is incredible how a movement has formed and how individuals are taking action in communities. The lesson to take from Douglas is that the response doesn’t have to be resignation. It can be agency.”

#Michael Sheen #Interview #Buried #The Last Witness #BBC Radio 4 #it's interesting that with two little kids at home he went in a poisoned place anyway

761 notes · View notes

mountttmase · 4 months ago

Text

Catch You

Note - Holiday Mase alert 🚨 so glad I could get this posted before summer was over 😭 and thank you to @saltyheartnightmare for the concept that sparked this 🩷 I hope you enjoy and please let me know your thoughts 🥰

Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader

Word count - 24k

Warnings - fluff and angst

It had been a long time since Mason had a photoshoot like this and to say he was feeling a little awkward about it would be an understatement.

Especially now you were watching.

You weren’t meant to be there, in fact you were quite looking forward to an admin day in the office so you could get your life in order but today it just wasn’t meant to be.

You got that being the newest recruit meant you would have to do certain jobs until you’d earned the right to do what you’d been hired for but it had been three months now and you still felt like the office newbie.

Studying fashion had been hard and the fact you’d even managed to bag yourself a job as a stylist was an achievement in itself but no matter how many shoots you’d been on since joining you’d never managed to actually style anyone. You made tea’s or unloaded the van and set up the racks. All you wanted was your foot in the door and to actually do what you loved but it was taking longer than you’d thought it would.

You’d tried going it alone for a while after you’d graduated but you weren't getting anywhere so you signed up to an agency with the promise of collaborative working and shared ideas. It was turning out to be a lot easier than working by yourself as you were in an office most days working with loads of talented people but yet you still felt out of place a bit.

It was hard to book shoots or even work on other peoples when you weren’t published anywhere and you were finding it hard to build traction. All you needed was one little break, some good luck and you knew things would take off for you but since you weren't associated with anything to do with fashion in everyone else’s eyes, it was hard.

Your office bestie Freddie had tried, having already been signed up to the agency for a few years and having made the right connections meant right now he was on a shoot that had been set up for him by a friend from London. Apparently it was a big deal and he’d been working on it for months but you were glad not to see him today as all he did was distract you and today you needed calm and to get your head down.

It was difficult but you’d managed to get a fair bit done so when your phone buzzed at around 11am you chanced a look only to find your biggest distractions name pop up and from the look of the message you knew you had to reply.

You’d seen the box on his desk, a big REMEMBER FOR WEDNESDAY sign stuck to the top and after a sneaky peak you saw the watch in question. Thankfully the shoot wasn’t too far away and within half an hour you were walking into the shoot after stopping for a quick coffee as a treat for doing such a good deed.

It was unlike anything you’d ever seen before. Hordes of people running around as the loud bassy music filled the large open plan space. Lights flashing every few seconds as you caught sight of the photographer you’d seen on your previous shoot and you knew he meant business.

You managed to find Freddie fairly easily, right by the rails as he stood with his hands on his head and you knew he was losing his mind a bit until he saw you. A bright smile taking over his face as he grabbed yours and placed a big sloppy kiss on your forehead which made you giggle.

‘Don’t get too ahead of yourself, I might have brought the wrong one’ you laughed, digging into your bag and passing him the box but you saw his shoulders relax as soon as he set his eyes on it.

‘Thank god, honestly the last thing I needed was a fuck up today so I owe you one, Kid’ he told you, and you fought back the roll of your eyes at his stupid nickname for you. Placing the box on the table so he could reassess what he had and you used that time to have another quick look around and see what was going on.

‘How’s it going?’ You asked when you turned back but you could tell something wasn't right with him.

‘Alright I guess’ he shrugged and you raised your eyebrows in hopes he’d elaborate a bit. Working on a shoot like this was the ultimate dream for you so the fact it was only alright to him seemed strange and you knew something was wrong. ‘I don’t know, I feel like somethings missing and I’m not sure what. Would you take a look at the shots for me?’

‘Me?’

‘Yes you, you wombat. You might be able to see things I can’t’ he told you before nodding over to where the shoot was taking place and your jaw almost dropped to the floor when you saw the first picture.

How you hadn’t seen this man as soon as you walked in you’d never know but now you had you couldn’t stop looking. Your eyes flying from the screen to see him stood against the backdrop and his eyes met yours softly before he looked away with a timid smile.

He was a natural in front of the camera, doing everything they were telling him to effortlessly all while making everyone around him laugh but even though his personality was clearly shining through, he could have been as dull as a door knob and you still would have had the same reaction to seeing him.

He was beautiful.

Dark brown eyes that shone under the floodlights, a beautifully sculpted nose that you wanted to run your finger down and a smile that you knew would break a million hearts. He was pretty in a way most boys aren’t and as he stood there in a full suit and just socks you felt your heart stumble and how cute he looked.

‘Who’s he?’ You asked, trying to act as nonchalant as possible and not arouse suspicion that you’d just seen the most beautiful creature ever created but thankfully Freddie was so in his own head he didn’t suspect a thing.

‘Who Mason? Footballer, he plays for United’ he told you and you just nodded and pretended like you knew what that meant. It shocked you that he wasn’t an actual model as he definitely had the face for it but you could tell from his build he was sporty. His muscular arms almost straining against his selves and you had to tear your eyes away from him to look back at the screen. ‘You remember Woody? He’s his best friend and set this up for me’

You’d met Woody once at a work event and emailed him a few times since then. He worked for the same agency as you just down in London but you had no idea his best friend looked like a gift from god and you started the piece all the parts together as you watched Mason awkwardly stand there as his hair was being messed with for the next shots.

‘Wow it really is who you know huh’ you teased but you could see him rolling his eyes as you looked at a few more pictures before Freddie huffed in annoyance.

‘Do you see what I mean? Something's off’ he told you and as you chewed on your lip you wondered if you should tell him the truth or play it safe with him however in the end you knew you had to tell him your thoughts honestly as this shoot clearly meant a lot to him.

‘I think there’s too much going on. It’s supposed to be all about the watch right?’ You asked and he nodded at you curiously. ‘Okay well the tie needs to go first if all and there too many rings on just the one will be fine’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, keep the ring finger one on the opposite hand but the rest can go. Keep the top button done up as well and add a button clip. What else do you have?’

‘The other outfits are over by the rail with the model shots on. Let me sort him out but you go take a look I’ll be back’ he told you before scurrying off to adjust Mason so you could take a look at what was left to come. You knew what he meant and even though you liked every style he’d picked there were changes you would have made and thankfully enough the pair of you were comfortable enough around each other to say it like it is. ‘What do you think then, kid?’ You suddenly heard, looking up to see Freddie looking at you expectantly so you quickly got out a pen to make notes on his sheet.

‘I don’t like that shirt open, button it up apart from the top few and tuck it in. And go with the vans over the Nikes’

‘You think?’ He questioned but you could tell from his voice he wasn’t questioning you and was actually taking on board what you had to say.

‘Definitely. And this one, try him without that jacket too like just with the vest’ you shrugged before looking up at his quizzical face. ‘Just try it, if I’m wrong I’m wrong’ you told him but it wasn't long before Freddie was being called over to the screen and you knew he liked what he was seeing now. Calling you over to have a look for yourself before you were grinning at each other.

‘Can you go pick me a belt out for him to go with the tucked in shirt? I think we might need a chunkier one’ he told you as you walked back over to the racks and you scanned over the accessories as Freddie started typing on his phone before he nudged you shoulder. ‘You want a coffee?’

‘Oh sure, do you want me to get everyone’s order?’ You asked. Slipping back into your assistant persona quickly but he was quick to shake his head at you.

‘Nah, I’ll get one of the interns to go. Just tell me what you want’ he told you and you had to stop yourself from smiling. This was the first time someone had ever taken your order on a shoot and it felt like a big moment for you.

‘Oh um, a latte please’ you nodded, turning away to hide your smile and you could see him writing it down before he was looking back up with a smile.

‘No worries’ he chuckled, looking around until his eyes fell on Mason and you made yourself look busy by picking out a belt like Freddie had told you too. ‘Mase! You want a coffee?’

‘Latte please’ he called back, his voice getting closer as he made his way over and the sound of it made you smile. He sounded friendly but sexy at the same time and you found yourself biting your lip to try and hide how giddy you were feeling at the prospect of maybe getting to talk to him.

‘Mase come here, I want you to meet y/n’ Freddie called, pulling on your arm to get you to turn around and once you had he was a lot closer than you first realised.

‘Nice to meet you’ you smiled, holding your hand out for Mason to shake but when he flashed you his pearly whites you suddenly didn’t feel as confident as you did a few seconds ago. You felt shy and intimidated by his looks which never usually happened but you could also see he was just a normal nice guy underneath all that and it settled you a little and his hand felt warm in yours as he shook it.

‘You too’ he replied quietly, his cheeks a healthy shade of pink now and you figured he was just a little shy when he couldn't keep up eye contact with you for very long before he was looking to Freddie for help.

‘She’s actually made a few last minute changes to what you’re wearing but I just need you to go with it’ Freddie explained, but Mason just nodded along like it was nothing. Clearly he was used to lots of last minute changes in these conditions.

‘You know me mate, I just do what I’m told’ Mason laughed but before anyone could say anything else he was whisked off with a new outfit in hand to get changed into. His silly comment making your cheeks burn for a reason you didn’t want to elaborate on but thankfully Freddie was too in the zone to quiz you about anything.

You stayed for the rest of the shoot. Getting things ready for Mason to change into and Freddie even let you have the final say before Mason went back in front of the camera. You and Mason catching eyes every now and then and everytime he smiled because of you the photographer would tell him to keep going and smile more.

The plan wasn’t to spend the whole day at the shoot by soon enough it was 4:30 and you wondered where the day had gone. You’d had the best time though and the day had only cemented in your brain that this was exactly where you should be. Hopefully soon you’d be the one calling all the shots though.

‘Were going for dinner soon, you coming?’ Freddie asked as he brushed up beside you whilst you packed some things away but you just shrugged, not sure if he wanted you to say yes or no.

‘Oh um, I don’t want to intrude’ you started but Freddie just shook his head with a smile.

‘You wouldn’t be, Mase actually asked if you were coming so consider yourself officially invited’

‘I need to tidy some bits away at the office and send some emails’ you mused, knowing if you stayed and went for dinner you’d have extra work to make up tomorrow but the thought of getting to eye up Mason a bit more was swaying you.

‘Well head off now and you can meet us there okay?’ Freddie insisted and that was all it took to convince you. Packing your bag away and with a few quick goodbyes you rushed back to the office with a spring in your step.

You were in a pretty good mood and managed to get all your tasks done easily. Freddie texting you around 15 minutes before you were due to leave and thankfully the restaurant wasn’t too far from the office. You spotted Freddie straight away, tapping the seat that was next to him for you to sit down in but the fact Mason was on the other side made you excited and nervous. Wondering if you’d be able to talk to him a little more after today's events and thankfully enough you saw the way his face lit up as you approached.

‘You don’t mind me sitting here do you?’ You asked as you slid into the seat but he just shook his head as he subtly chewed on his bottom lip.

‘Of course not. I saved that one especially for you so I can pick your brains a bit’ he winked. Feeling your cheeks flush at the thought of him wanting to sit with you and it was almost as if you couldn't contain your surprise.

‘Me?’

‘Yeah, of course. You really made the difference today so I’ve got some questions for you… if that’s alright like you can tell me to shut up’

‘No no, I’d love that. Hit me with it’

You barely said three words to Freddie all night. Mason was taking up all of your attention as you spoke about the day and all it entailed until you branched off into other things. The conversation flowing easily between the two of you and you could feel your cheeks hurting from smiling so much as he came out of his shell throughout the evening. Eventually showing you some pictures of his all time fashion fails so you could laugh at them together.

Freddie took you home when it was time to leave and after a big hug goodbye from Mason, Freddie was giving you a look as he walked you to the tube.

‘What’s that look for?’

‘No reason? You have a good night?’

‘The best. Thank you so much for letting me stay like the whole days been amazing’

‘Well it should be me that’s thanking you, you really saved me today’ he told you, flinging his arm around your shoulder but he really didn’t need to thank you at all.

‘I’ve always got your back bestie’

y/n recently added to their stories

Considering the shoot day was the first time you’d met Mason, ever since that day he’d become somewhat of a repeat cast member to the insane reality show that was becoming your life.

Freddie had a fair few jobs lined up with him as Mason had some events coming up that he needed to be dressed for so you’d seen him a few times in the office for fittings. Unfortunately it was only in passing and you hadn’t managed to have a proper chat with him like that first day at dinner but he was always quick to greet you with a warm smile and a quick hug and you knew the silly little crush on him you’d developed on the first day of meeting him was going nowhere.

It was hard not to like him, he was gorgeous and funny and his smile made your heart race but the fact he was just a normal guy made you warm to him immediately and everytime he was around your eyes would constantly find his until you were both laughing every time it happened. The both of you never really knowing what you were laughing at and therefore unable to explain it to anyone else but just one look into his triple chocolate fudge brownie eyes made you giddy.

Even when you got home you didn’t stop thinking about him. Spending your nights watching countless tiktoks of him goofing around or searching him up on YouTube to watch his game highlights. You’d never been into football before and had no idea what was going on but watching him run around with a big smile on his face made your heart happy and you couldn’t believe your new friend was so talented. Feeling an immense sense of pride as you looked over all of his accomplishments so far.

It was a few weeks later when you got to talk to him properly again. Walking into the office to see him sat in your seat next to Freddie’s desk and you felt happier immediately knowing you’d get to see him today. Wondering if you might get a bit longer to talk to him and from the cheeky smile he sent you, you figured he might be just as happy to see you.

‘You’re in my seat, Mount’ you told him playfully, watching him look up at you in shock before the brightest smile you’d ever seen flashed across his face.

‘I’m just keeping it warm for you’ he winked, getting up as you approached but before you couldn’t do much else as he pulled you into a bone crushing hug causing you to laugh into his chest.

‘Oh get a room you two’ you suddenly heard Freddie moan. Lifting your head up to see him smiling at you as he walked over but you just rolled your eyes. Feeling Mason's chest rumble as he chuckled at his stupid comment but the pair of you pulled away from each other slowly so as not to cause anymore comments to be made. ‘You ready Mase?’

‘What’s happening?’ You questioned as Freddie dropped a box on his desk that he began to open and you couldn't make out what was going on even though they seemed excited by it.

‘’I’ve got the first copy of his edition’ Freddie smiled, pulling the box apart to retrieve a few copies and it was like the excitement had slapped you across the face.

‘Ooo I wanna see’ you replied, your voice excited as you clapped yours hands together and fought to make you way next to Freddie who was flapping it open and pulling one out.

‘I thought you might, that’s why we waited for you. Thanks for being late today, kid’ he teased but you just rolled your eyes.

‘Oh be quite’ you huffed. Taking the copy he handed you and when Mason placed his hands on your shoulders from behind, you smiled up at him. The pair of you excited to see how it had all turned out and as soon as your eyes landed on the front cover they began to well up.

You remember that picture being taken. It was just after you’d met Mason and once he’d gone back to take a few more shots you remembered him looking over to you as you and Freddie bickered like siblings over what belt to go with the next outfit.

‘What do you think?’ Freddie asked quietly, nudging your shoulder as he passed Mason his own copy but you were eager to see more of what was inside.

‘It looks amazing’

‘Yeah I’m not bad am I’ you heard Mason murmur next to you causing you to giggle but you couldn’t disagree with him. He looked gorgeous.

Every picture looked better than the last and even though it was a struggle, you were trying not to look at his face. Wanting to look at what he was wearing and all the changes you’d made but as you flicked through to the last page you felt your heart stutter.

‘Wait what’s that?’ You mumbled. Your voice slightly shaken as you read over what you thought you’d seen and no matter how much you blinked it didn’t go away.

‘What’s what?’ Freddie asked and when you looked up to him he was looking back with a knowing smile.

‘Is that my name?’ You whispered, pointing down to where it was written in black and white and it was almost like you were in a dream.

‘Of course it is’ Freddie smiled, shrugging his shoulder like it was nothing but to you it meant everything.

‘But Freddie I didn’t-‘

‘You saved my bacon, it’s the least I could do’ he told you sincerely and before you knew it you’d launched yourself at him. Hugging him tightly and he held you back knowing how big this was for the both of you. ‘Now you’re published, you can help me on my next shoot, right?’ He laughed, pulling away and ruffling your hair a bit but you didn’t even mind. You were too over the moon with everything to care.

‘Really?’

‘I’ll set us up a meeting, yeah? I wanna get your input. I think you and me are gonna make a pretty good team’

‘Oh Freddie, this changes everything for me, you know that right?’ You told him. Your bottom lip wobbling as you were so overcome with emotion but you held it in as best as you could.

‘I know kid’ he told you sincerely as you felt your eyes well with tears. You didn’t want him to see you this emotional though so you flung your arms around his shoulders so you could hide away but you felt his chuckle as he pulled you in and swayed you from side to side a bit. ‘Come on, don’t get upset. You don’t wanna be known as the office cryer’ he joked. Pulling away from you so you could wipe your eyes but you weren’t alone for too long. Mason wrapping his arms around your shoulders from behind and settling his cheek on top of your head as you melted into him.

‘We should celebrate’ Mason smiled and you nodded enthusiastically before his eyes fell to Freddie but from the sour look he was giving you you knew he wouldn’t be able to make it.

‘I can’t mate, I’ve got a date with the old ball and chain tonight’ Freddie winked but you just rolled your eyes. You hadn’t met his girlfriend Lex yet but Freddie always spoke about her like the sun shone out of her arse so you knew he was just playing.

‘Just you and me then?’ He questioned. Looking down at you before moving you to the side and even though you wanted to shout yes you also didn’t want to come across as too eager. ‘Come on, let me buy you dinner for making me look so good’ he asked and you couldn’t help but giggle.

‘Okay’ you smiled, watching his face light up as you nodded and suddenly you were filled with nerves.

‘Perfect. I’ll pick you up after work yeah? When you you finish?’

‘I can be out of here by five’

‘Okay I’ll meet you out the front’ he smiled warmly and even if you wanted to reply you could. Freddie announcing he needed Mason in one of the dressing rooms to try some things on and you knew you needed to get on with your emails so you let him go.

It was at times like this you were grateful you kept a little makeup bag at work. Slipping off to the toilets so you could spruce yourself up a bit before Mason came to get you and thankfully he came right back into your office to escort you back down to his car. Freddie waving you off like a proud parent but you just rolled your eyes at him.

The place Mason had picked wasn’t so fancy that you felt out of place but it was definitely one of the nicer places you’d ever been to. The pair of you next to each other in a round booth so you could hear the other and even though you could tell he was a little bit shy, he still gave you good eye contact which in turn was making you feel shyer than you had in a long time.

‘So you know Woody, right?’ He asked as the waiter left with your orders. ‘I spoke to him the other day and he mentioned he speaks to you sometimes’

‘Yeah I’ve met him once and we’ve emailed a bit, he’s a cute kid’ you smiled but the look on his face made you realise what you’d said.

‘Don’t let him hear you say that’ he laughed, your face burning instantly that you’d called him that in front of his best friend but from the way Mason was laughing you knew it would be fine.

‘Sorry, Freddie keeps calling me kid and it’s stuck but I know the feeling it makes me furious. Please don’t tell him I said that’

‘Secrets safe with me’ he winked and you felt your face warm.

The conversation flowed easily and he grew with confidence as the time passed. Making silly jokes that had you laughing more than you had in a while and it was so nice to see him come out of his shell a little bit and be the cheeky boy you’d come to know from videos online.

‘Any exciting plans coming up that I can crash?’ He asked, sending you a wink and your heart fluttered at his cute little face.

‘Not really, I’m trying to book myself onto some jobs and make some connections so I’m hoping that will be a little easier now’ you told him, watching him nod understandingly as you wracked your brain to think of something else that didn’t make you sound so boring. ‘Oh I’ve got a work trip coming up with some of the guys too in a couple of months but I think it’s just an excuse for a holiday in all honesty’

‘Malta right?’

‘How did you know?’ You smiled, watching his cheeks and nose flush as he smiled sweetly.

‘Woodys going, he extended the invite actually since I know most of you lot going but I wasn’t sure since he’s taking his girlfriend’ he huffed, rolling his eyes like he was annoyed his best friend had been stolen from him. ‘I didn’t wanna be the third wheel but now I know you’ll be there I may reconsider’ he winked ‘Unless you’ve got a boyfriend you’re taking… or girlfriend you know, whatever floats your boat’

‘No I don't have a boyfriend to take… or a girlfriend’ you laughed. ‘I’m not even sure I want to go, the other two girls are like thing one and two so I know I’ll be on my own and Freddie’s taking his girlfriend so he’s not gonna be around much on the off days’

‘All the more reasons for me to come then’ he winked and you couldn’t deny the idea excited you.

‘Mason you’ve known me three weeks’

‘Exactly so I’ve still got so much to learn and what an amazing time to do it’ he laughed, but you noticed after his face fell a little bit. ‘If you don’t want me to I won't come’

‘Don’t pull out on my account’ you laughed, feeling slightly bad for making him feel not welcome. ‘What will you do while we’re at the event though?’

‘There’s a training camp not too far, it’s a good excuse for some warm weather training’ he shrugged and you could tell he was a little disappointed by your reaction.

‘I suppose it’ll be nice to have someone to sit with at dinner’ you mused, watching his face light up knowing you wanted him there and wouldn’t turn him away.

‘So you’ll let me come?’ He asked quietly.

‘It’s not my decision’ you laughed ‘But if it was then yes I’d let you’

‘Consider me there then’ he laughed before changing the subject. Gushing about how well you’d done at the shoot and how he loved all the changes you’d made. Asking if maybe the pair of you could work on some things together that Freddie couldn’t fit in and the thought of getting to dress Mason excited you more than you thought it should.

Mason dropped you home at the end of the night, refusing to let you walk up to your flat alone and just as he was saying goodby you lent up to kiss his cheek to say thank you. Clearly he wasn’t expecting it and you watched as his face softened when you pulled away and you could have sworn he was blushing a little bit. Bidding you a quick goodbye like he was nervous and once you’d shut your door you couldn’t help but smile at how adorable he was.

A knock on your door a few moments after made you laugh as you knew it could only be him and when you opened the door back up to Mason standing there awkwardly as you sent him a bright smile.

‘You forget something?’

‘Could I um… could I maybe get your number?’ He gulped ‘I was gonna ask Freddie for it but that felt a bit lame and intrusive’

Considering Mason was a footballer you couldn’t get over how nervous and shy he was around you. This wasn’t the same boy you’d met a few weeks ago posing for the camera but you loved that he had a soft side like this that he was willing to show you so you quickly nodded and held your hand out for his phone which he unlocked for you.

Once he was ready to go again It was his turn to kiss your cheek this time and you knew he was terrified. Bolting away as soon as his lips touched your skin and you stood there giggling as he practically ran away from you.

You kept in touch over text, Freddie and Mason working on a few more things together as he had some events to go to and thus sometimes you’d see him in the office. He would always stop by for a quick hug and a chat though and each time you saw him your cheeks would ache more and more.

Having a crush on a footballer wasn’t something that was on your bingo card for this year but it seemed to have hit you like a truck. Every time his name popped up on your phone your chest felt warm and he made you laugh like no one else. Every picture that he sent you made your tummy flutter and you were certain you’d never seen a man as pretty as him before.

You knew how you felt about Mason, and you were pretty sure he felt the same. Always seeking you out when he could and it didn’t help with comments from Freddie all the time. Telling you both to get a room or just kiss already and the fact Mason would wink at you everytime let you know it was something he maybe actually wanted.

You’d managed to hang out with him for longer too. Freddie inviting you along for dinner with Mason to talk about another shoot that was coming up but when Freddie’s girlfriend showed up too, you felt like you were on a double date. Her giving you the eyes like she knew something was going on but in reality nothing was. The fact this was the first time you’d met her and she was already picking up on the vibe satisfied you though as clearly others could see what you already knew.

You were typing away at your desk the next morning when your phone buzzed. Masons face popping up on your screen with a picture you’d taken of him at drinks the week prior and his silly smile still made your heart flutter like the first time you’d seen it.

You knew Freddie was on his way over so you quickly locked your phone but because Mason never wanted to be the last one to send a text, his name was flashing up soon after he’d joined you and you knew his eyes had caught his name immediately. Raising his brows at you accusingly but you just looked away and pretended to get on with some work.

‘So you and Mason, huh?’ Freddie started, clearly not wanting to let you drop the subject but you kept your eyes fixated on your screen as you typed up some notes for an upcoming shoot.

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’

‘Yes you do’ he laughed, your face warming instantly. ‘You know as much as I invited you out for dinner with me and Lex so we could discuss ideas I also did it because I know you both need a kick the bum’

‘Since when when do you meddle in my love life’

‘Since I can see two people who are clearly crazy about each other. Why don’t you take the plunge and tell him, I’ve never known you to not speak your mind’ he told you and his words hit home. Why hadn’t you said anything to him?

‘Freddie I can’t’ you huffed. Knowing he was right and you were never one to shy away from telling someone how you felt but this was different. This was Mason.

‘Look if you don't want to then I won’t push you but he fancies the pants off you’ he shrugged, looking at whatever was in his hands so you couldn’t tell if he was joking or not but when he eventually looked over at your confused face he gave you a reassuring smile. ‘Its true, told me himself that first day you met when you went back to the office before dinner. Why do you think I saved you that seat?’

‘You’re lying’

‘I would never lie to you. He’s just a bit shy around you, that's all yeah? I bet if you were to talk to him about it he’d tell you’ he said nonchalantly like the thought of opening yourself up like that to someone wasn't terrifying.

‘I don’t want things to be weird’

‘They won’t be. I’m not saying you’ve got to marry him but just go on a few dates or something. Get to know him properly. He’s a good guy y/n, and you’d be good for him’ he smiled.

Mason wouldn’t tell you where you were going but told you to dress as nice as you usually do which made you giggle like a schoolgirl. He was unbelievably charming without even really trying and the more you thought about what Freddie had said to you the week prior the more you knew he was right. You were both dancing around the subject and if all Mason needed was a little push then you'd be more than happy to point him in the right direction.

When the night eventually arrived you tried to act as normal as you could with him, but Freddie’s words were replaying in your head. Did he really like you or was he just saying that in hopes you’d both figure it out along the way? Wanting the pair of you to be happy so he was trying to play Cupid but soon after you had sat down those thoughts vanished. Mason being his cheeky but charming self and you caught each other up on the last few weeks.

You never managed to pluck up the courage to speak to him about his feelings at dinner but now you were aware of what he might feel for you, you picked up on the subtle signs that made you think he was into you.

The way he would touch your back and lean into you as you made your way into the restaurant. Pulling your chair out for you as you took a seat before squeezing your shoulders gently. The way his eyes flickered between your eyes and lips as you spoke, hanging off every word you told him and you knew he was listening intently.

When it was time to leave he offered to drop you home just like usual and the urge to grab his hand and hold it on the way back to the car was overwhelming. You settled for him placing his arm around your shoulder though and when you wrapped yours around his waist he held you tighter.

‘Would you like to come in?’ You asked him as he parked up in his usual spot. Your voice full of nerves as you were unsure but he just nodded and smiled before unclipping his seat belt and the nerves hit you in full force as you walked him into your building and up to your flat. ‘Sorry it’s tiny here’ you laughed. Suddenly embarrassed by having him in your space knowing what he probably at home but he just smiled and pulled you into his arms.

‘Hey come here, what up?’ He asked, giving you a quick squeeze before he looked at you again but all you could do was shrug your shoulders.

‘I don’t know’

‘You seem nervous’ he teased and as hard as you tried to stop it you knew your cheeks were on fire.

‘Sorry, just not used to having boys here’

‘It’s only me’ he smiled sweetly, but he didn’t realise that that was the problem.

‘Yeah I know’ you laughed, rolling your eyes before pushing him in the direction on your sofa. ’Make yourself comfy, can I get you a drink or anything?’

‘Waters fine’ he nodded but once you’d returned to him and sat down he was still looking at you with a cheeky smile. ‘What are you doing all the way over there? You’re too far away’ he laughed, holding his hand out for you so you could sit next to him and you let him drag you along the sofa until you were giggling like school kids.

It was only when you both stopped laughing did you realise you needed to say something before you burst. Tucking your legs under your body as you looked at him and it must have been a strange look as you watched him look at you with terror written all over his face.

‘Mason? What would you do if I told you I liked you. Like like liked you’ you asked him, your voice steady as you looked right at him but as soon as the words left your lips he was looking in his lap with a smile and bright red cheeks

‘I’d tell you I like liked you too’ he replied quietly. A sense of relief washing over you and it was also as if you couldn't believe it.

‘Yeah?’

‘Of course’ he giggled. Finding the courage to look back at you again and it was like the pair of you were overflowing with joy. Reaching for the others hands as you lent into each other

‘Mason, I do really like you-‘

‘Oh here it comes’ he laughed, squeezing your hand gently and even though he sounded a little annoyed you could tell he was just playing. ‘Here comes the but’

‘What?’ You giggled, unsure as to what he was getting at but his smile was infectious and you couldn't help but laugh along.

‘I can tell it’s coming from the tone of your voice. ‘I really like you but, you’re a great person but’. Come on then, what’s the but? Break my heart, let’s get it over with’

‘I like you, but I have rules’ you confirmed and you watched his face change immediately.

‘Rules?’ He questioned, clearly not expecting that to come from your lips and you thought how his confused face was adorable.

‘Yes, rules. I’m not the sort of girl to jump right into things okay? I like to take my time and make sure it’s right and that we’re both on the same page. Like what are you looking for exactly?’

‘With you?’ He asked. His eyebrows shooting up at the prospect of having to tell you how he felt but you needed to hear it from him so you both could start at the same place.

‘Yeah. Like what do you see me as? Cause if it’s just sex or something casual that’s not me. I know myself and I’ll just get swept up and hurt so we might as well be honest from the start’

‘Well that’s definitely not what I see you as’ he told you quietly, his face as red as a tomato at the mention of sex and you found his slightly awkward demeanour endearing. ‘I like hanging out with you, and I want to see where things take us’ he told you, but you could tell he was finding it hard to admit his feelings. Thinking maybe it was best you took the lead and laid your cards out on the table for him to follow.

‘I like hanging out with you too’ you smiled watching his shoulders relax as he sent you a shy smile. ‘I think we should hang out some more, like maybe go on an actual date and see what happens’

‘Okay’ he nodded ‘yeah let’s do it’

‘Perfect. Okay rule number two: I also like to keep my business private, you know? That doesn't mean we need to be secretive about whatever might be happening but I just want it kept between us. If I’m in a relationship with someone I want it to be with them and keep it for us rather than share it with everyone. Does that sound okay?’

‘Sounds like music to my ears’ he laughed before taking your hand and pulling you in further to his side. ‘Look I like you okay? I really like you and I’m happy to go with the flow and see where things take us. I’m good at going at whatever pace you want. No pressure or anything, okay?’

‘Okay’ you nodded, thankful he was starting to be able to talk about this a bit more freely. ‘So what do you want?’

‘I want to take you on a date. Many dates in fact’ he laughed and you fell forward into his chest as you tried to hide your giggles in his neck. ‘I want to get to know you better, but from what I know so far I’d say you’re pretty perfect for me’ he divulged and the thought of him thinking that about you already made your heart thump. Wanting to change the subject quickly before you got carried away and declared your undying love for him.

‘Are you… taking other girls on dates? Cause I don’t play those sorts of games’

‘I feel like I’m in a job interview’ he laughed, tickling your side as you squirmed further into his body and you couldn’t get over the feel of it under your fingers. This was the closest the pair of you had been for a long period of time and all you could think about was getting to wrap yourself around him more often ‘But no, I’m not taking other girls on dates. Haven’t been involved with anyone in months actually, I'm a free man. What about you anyway?

‘Too busy with work for dates’ you shrugged. Sitting up to look at him as you were now practically in his lap and all you wanted was to look at his pretty eyes up close.

‘But not too busy for me?’

‘Of course not’ you whispered. ‘Look I’m sorry for all the questions I just like to know where I stand’

‘It’s okay, I like it. It makes it easier knowing what we both want’

‘Well I’m big on communication’ you winked as you grabbed the zip of his jacket to play with and the smile he sent you made your tummy flutter.

‘I can see that. Look, I’m not here to mess you about okay? I like spending time with you and I want to get to know you more. As for all the other stuff I’ll leave that up to you’ he winked. ‘Like when you’re ready and you think the time is right to move onto the next step I’ll be ready to go’

‘Yeah?’

‘Of course. You know I think you’re gorgeous, but don’t tell anyone’ he whispered playfully, tickling your side lightly to tease you but the fact he’d admitted to finding you attractive made you flush.

‘Masonnnn’ you groaned. Trying to hide again as he laughed but he finally wrapped his arms around you fully and you felt yourself relax into his chest.

‘It’s true. Thought it as soon as I saw you. You never saw them but there’s a few shots of me I made then delete from when you first walked in and I was stiff as fuck’ he laughed and even though you knew he didn’t mean it in that way you still looked up at him with a brow raised in disgust.

‘Not like that,’ he laughed. His face going a bright red as he hid his face in your hair and it wasn’t long before you were both giggling again. You tried to move to get him to look at you but he wouldn’t budge.

‘Mason look at me’

‘No I’m embarrassed’ he laughed. ‘I meant like, nervous stiff. They had to tell me to relax my shoulders cause I’d clammed up’

‘Sure’ you winked, watching him roll his eyes as he knew that was something for you to tease him about now. ‘Okay so let’s go on a date’

‘Okay’ he smiled. ‘I’ll think of something good I promise. I have one condition about this whole thing though’

‘What’s that?’

‘When the time is right and you wanna make things official, like if we get there, please can you let me ask you? Like just give me a sign and I’ll make it special for us’

‘What sort of sign?’ you giggled, your cheeks turning red at the thought of him wanting to be official with you at some point but he just shrugged his shoulders.

‘I don’t know, poke me in the ribs or something?’

‘You’re insane’ you laughed, tucking your head into his neck so you could hide but when you wrapped each other up into your arms you felt a sense of peace that you hadn’t felt in a long time wash over you.

Mason couldn’t stay too much longer, having an early morning training session he had to get ready for so you walked him to the door with a pout.

‘So I’ll text you, yeah?’ He asked as you got the door and you sent him a wide grin.

‘You better’ you winked. Watching the corners of his mouth lift into a warm smile before he was leaning down to kiss your cheek just like usual.

There was something different about it this time though, his lips lingering in your skin just that bit longer which gave you the opportunity to raise your hand. Cupping the back of his head so that when he did try to pull away he couldn’t get too far and soon enough his lips were mere centimetres from your own.

You directed his movements and brought him down for your first kiss. Lips, soft and warm, slotting against each others like you’d kissed a million times before as you pressed your body against his even more. Mason's heart thrumming against your hand that was positioned on his chest and it almost matched your own heartbeat that was pounding in your ears.

You never wanted to stop kissing him. Slowly testing the waters as you inched your tongue past his lips but he was more than happy to reciprocate. A content hum falling from his as you played with each other slowly but when he playfully nibbled on your bottom lip you felt your knees go weak. Thankfully he was holding onto you tightly and when you reluctantly pulled away he was looking at you in awe. Lips plump and pink and you couldn’t resist going back in for seconds.

Mason wasn’t in the mood to keep it soft this time. Backing you up against the door as you gripped his shoulders and the vice-like grip on your waist excited you. Kissing you with as much passion as he could muster until you were both moaning into each other's mouths deliciously .

It was Mason that broke the kiss suddenly. Both of your breathing was laboured as he kissed your forehead gently and when you looked back to his face you were both blushing furiously.

‘Sorry’ he chuckled, pressing one more kiss to your lips before pulling away slightly. ‘I should get going’

‘Okay’ you pouted. Knowing it was right for him to go but now you’d finally kissed him all you could think about was kissing him again. ‘Text me when you’re home please’

‘Of course’ he smiled and with one final peck to his pouty lips you let him go.

You let Mason organise your first date, him not really giving you any clues as he wanted it to be a surprise but he promised it wouldn’t be just dinner as you guys had done that a few times before. He told you to dress fairly casually, which you did, and when he picked you up in a grey hoodie and a pair of green cargos you were reminded of how much you loved what he wore every time you’d seen him and the way he managed to make everyday outfits look just that little bit better.

You ended up at treetop mini golf. A place you’d been eying up to go to for ages and you wondered how he knew but in the end you realise it was just a coincidence. You were more than excited though and clearly he was using all his training from actual golf to help as he was winning by a mile.

‘Mase?’ You pouted after his third hole in one. ‘Do you think you could help me?’

‘Of course I can’ he smiled charmingly. ‘What would you like help with?

‘Can you show me how you do it?’ You asked, biting your lip as you reached out a hand for him and once he’d taken it you pulled him over to stand behind you as you wrapped his arms around you. ‘Show me how to swing’

You could tell he was nervous, the warmth of his chest pressed up against your back and it was like you could feel his heart hammering against you before he began to whisper in your ear.

‘Bend your knees a little bit, and arch your back slightly-‘

‘Mason please, were in public’ you teased, and you knew he was embarrassed. Wrapping his arms around you tightly as he buried his head in your neck to stop the laughs but the pair of you were giggling like school children.

‘You’re killing me’

‘Ahh, my plan is working’ you teased. Spinning in his arms so you could face him and you couldn’t stop yourself from giving him a quick kiss. The first one of the night and you could tell he’d been waiting a while for it as he kissed you with a smile and sighed into your mouth.

y/n recently added to their stories

It was your 5th date that fell a week before your trip. Mason had treated you to all sorts of adventures from axe throwing to a drive-in movie but today's outing was a little bit more laid back. Mason currently having Ace for a few days and you knew he needed lots of walks so you met him at the local park to grab a coffee and let Ace have a run around.

It was you that took his hand in yours but him who laced your fingers together and squeezed them gently. Letting you know he was more than happy to hold your hand just like usual he just needed you to make that first move sometimes and when he sent you a toothy lopsided grin you felt your heart stutter.

‘Listen I wanted to talk to you about something’ you told him, watching him raise his brow at you over his cup as he took a sip and you weren’t quite sure how he was going to take what you were about to say. ‘It's about the trip next week’

‘You’re still alright with me going, yeah? Cause you can tell me if you’re not i don’t mind-‘

‘No I want you there I promise’ you laughed, cutting him off as you could see he was about to spiral. ‘I was just wondering if we could maybe keep things on the down low a little while we’re there?’ You asked and you didn’t wait for a reaction before you began explaining yourself. ‘If it was a friends holiday then it would be different it’s just cause I’ll be there with people I work with and that doesn’t mean I want you to keep away from me, like we can still hang out just the two of us-

‘Hey it’s okay’ he laughed. Reaching down to pop a quick kiss on your forehead. ‘I get it, don’t worry

‘Are you sure, I don’t want you to think I don’t want to be seen with you’

‘I don’t think that, gorgeous’ he smiled. ‘It makes perfect sense to me, okay? You don't need to worry’ he confirmed. Squeezing your hand once more to make you believe him and after you sent him a gentle nod he pulled you into his side even further to give you a cuddle. ‘Are you busy for the rest of today?’

‘Never too busy for you, Mason’

‘Come back to mine after? Just for a little bit’ he asked and the idea of being alone with him in his house excited you. Since you were taking things slowly you’d never been to his house but now seemed like a good time and you thought it was cute how he didn’t want to part from you.

‘Okay’ you whispered. Nerves taking over you slightly but when you pulled up to his house, it was even more than you could have imagined. It was humongous, each room decorated perfectly and it’s like he had everything you could ever want and more so after making a pit stop in the kitchen for drinks and snacks, he led you to his huge sofa so you could pick out a movie and relax a bit.

You sat cuddled up in the corner of the sofa as you spoke about next week with the movie as just background noise now. Mason insisting that he’d pick you up in the morning to take you to the airport and you didn’t have the energy to argue with him. It had been a long afternoon and Ace had knackered you out so when Mason shuffled the pair of you down and brought you into his arms you let yourself cuddle into him even more.

‘If you’re not careful, I might just fall for you, Mount’ you told him quietly. Feeling more comfortable and content than you had in the longest time and the quiet rumble of his chest under your ear made you smile.

‘Well if you’re not careful, I might catch you’ he whispered softly against your forehead. Placing a gentle kiss there as you nestled your nose into the soft skin of his neck and you felt the butterflies swarm. Truth was you knew you were already falling for him and had been for a while, you just needed to grow a pair and give him the sign that you were ready to take things further.

That could wait for new though. Right now you felt safe and warm in his arms as he lightly trailed his fingers over your waist and as much as you wanted to kiss him, you also felt like you might not be able to stop yourself from taking things further this time.

‘I could get used to this, you’re comfy’ you told him quietly and you knew he’d heard you but he was too shy to reply. Holding you tighter as you felt your body go heavy and let the sleep finally take you.

A week later, Mason picked you up along the way in the morning to take you to the airport. Helping you get your bags in the Uber before you popped a quick kiss to his lips and once again your favourite blush spread across his cheeks.

Most people were there by the time you arrived, the pair of you quickly saying hello to everyone before he reintroduced you to Woody who in turn introduced you to his girlfriend, Kaz. She seemed sweet and you were glad you would have another girl to hang out with alongside Lex as the only other two girls you knew were Lindsay and Louise. Freddie had always referred to them as thing one and two as they tended to stick together and as much as you loved Freddie, sometimes you needed some girl company.

You and Mason managed to take yourselves off away from everyone. Sitting on your own so you could talk quietly and get ready for the flight you knew Mason was a bit nervous for but the sudden sound of a boy shouting made the two of you snap your heads up. Mason's face turning sour instantly as the boy made his rounds to say hello to a few of the guys and it was then you noticed Mason shuffling uncomfortably in his seat.

‘I didn’t know he was coming’

‘Who’s that?’ You asked. Not having seen him around before so you presumed he was from the London office but you were curious as to why Mason was reacting like this.

‘Thats Carl, he’s worked with Woody on a few things’

‘Do you know him well?’

‘Use to’ he shrugged but you didn’t have a chance to reply as Carl made his way over to the pair of you. His eyes flashing to Mason’s hand that was clasped around yours before he looked right at you and the sly smirk he sent your way made your skin crawl.

‘Mason, long time no see man. How’s things’ he asked. Mason jumping up so they could pat each other on the back but you could tell from Masons posture he didn’t want to be near him that much.

‘Good mate, you?’

‘Yeah really good thanks’ he nodded and before you knew it he was motioning towards you. ‘Who’s this pretty little thing?’

‘I’m y/n’ you told him after a quick roll of your eyes. Not wanting to cause a scene and call him out for his stupid comment but you could see his face change as soon as you told him your name. An impressed expression overtaking his features and you wondered why.

‘Ah y/n I’ve seen some of your stuff floating around. You’re pretty good’

‘Oh… oh thank you’ you told him. A sense of pride filling you at the fact people were not starting to see your work and you returned his bright smile.

‘Yeah even managed to make this one look good’ he laughed, motioning over to Mason. ‘I’ve tried a few times I know how hard it is’ he teased. Feeling Mason stiffening besides you as Carl tried to make a joke at his expense but you wouldn’t let that happen on your watch.

‘Oh really? I thought it was really easy’ you shrugged. Turning back to Mason who was giving you a shy smile and you could tell he was thankful for you sticking up for him a bit. ‘I won’t be a sec, I'm going to the loo’ you told him. Kissing his cheek quickly before standing up and you left without giving Carl and other glance.

‘Finally got yourself some then huh?’ Carl laughed and Mason could feel his blood boiling at the way he was speaking about you. Not wanting to fully divulge and tell him exactly what the pair of you were as he knew what he was like so he just shrugged his shoulders and tried to act unbothered by him.

‘It's not like that’

‘Oh she’s not yours then? So I don’t mind if I have a crack?’

‘Carl, it’s so good to see you’ Woody interrupted and Mason was thankful he’d stepped in. Knowing Mason would have probably exploded if he hadn’t have. It was one thing Carl making jibes about him but a whole other issue when he was speaking about you and he realised at that moment this was about to be a long trip.

‘Gates ready!’ Freddie called and with one final wink at Mason, Carl was walking off to find the others leaving him standing there to stew. Wondering if he even wanted to go away with everyone now but once he saw you walking back towards him with that beautiful smile on your face he realised you were his reason to stay.

‘Mase, you ready?’ You asked, your voice laced with concern as you could see something had changed with him.

‘Yeah I’ll meet you there’

‘It’s okay I’ll wait with you’ you smiled, trying to get him to smile at you but once you realised he wouldn’t you placed your hand on his arm to get him to look at you. ‘Are you alright?’

‘I’m fine’ he breathed, his eyes scanning the room to see if anyone from your group was left and once he was satisfied it was just the two of you he pulled you in for a tight hug. ‘I know we said we’d keep things on the down low a bit but I just need a quick cuddle‘

‘Oh Mase’ you whispered, feeling the way he clung to you so tightly a little concerning and the thought of this being the last proper hug you might share for a while upset you and even though it was you who set the boundaries in the first place you were ready to tear them up for him. ‘I know it was my choice but we don’t have to keep things on the down low’

‘No?’

‘Not if you don’t want to. I don't think I’ll be able to handle it and i'm pretty sure everyone knows what’s going on’ you giggled but you felt him relax as you spoke.

‘Well most people do at least’ he whispered but he didn’t have a chance to elaborate as Freddie was back calling you both to hurry up so you grabbed your bags and made your way to the queue to board. Reaching out to hold Mason's pinkie with your own and the smile he sent you made your tummy flip.

The flight was fine but you didn’t arrive at your hotel until late afternoon and once you were unpacked you made the short trip down the corridor to meet Mason. Most if you had decided to do your own thing for dinner tonight however Mason had invited you along to dinner with him, Woody and his girlfriend Kaz so you could get to know each other a bit and you were grateful to be able to see him in act so confidently around his friends and show you this new side of him.

Ever the gentleman, Mason walked you to your room that night and after a pretty heavy kiss by the door you bid each other goodnight. Mason letting you know he’d message you when he woke up so you could see when you wanted to head to the pool and as soon as your head hit the pillow you were out like a light.

‘Hey gorgeous’ he smiled, opening the door and popping a kiss on your cheek but you were quick to reach up and kiss him properly, feeling him chuckle onto your lips and it was all worth it for the shy smile he gave you when you pulled apart.

‘Morning Mase’

‘I’ve booked us into the hotel restaurant, no idea what the others are doing’ he shrugged as he shut his door but you just took his hand and let him lead you away.

‘How did you do that? I tried and they were full’

‘I have my ways’ he winked. Subtly letting you know he could probably get you anything you wanted but you loved the way he wasn’t flashy with it.

The food in the hotel was better than you had expected and when the pair of you were done, you made your way out to the pool. Thankfully only Freddie and Lex were out there and as you walked into his eyeline, Freddie waved you over and patted the double sun lounger next to him.

‘Morning love birds, I saved you a spot’

‘There’s no one else out here’ you laughed, dropping your bag on the seat and looking around but it was still only around 10am and most of the loungers were empty.

‘Where have you been?’

‘Breakfast’

‘What here?’ Freddie asked, his eyebrows shooting up as you nodded. ‘They said they were fully booked’

‘Apparently they make room for you if your names Mason Mount’ you joked, looking behind to see him standing there awkwardly on the other side of the lounger as if he didn’t want to presume you’d sit next to him but after a subtle nod of your head his shoulders relaxed.

You didn’t waste anymore time, wanting to get undressed to soak up the sun so you quickly slipped yourself out of your dress and packed it away before grabbing your book and when your eyes flashed over to Mason you felt like you might have to pick his jaw up off the floor.

Mason had never seen you in so little before, and you’d worn this bikini on purpose as you knew it accentuated all your best bits, and it was red, but you had no idea it would have garnered this reaction from him. Even from behind his sunglasses you could see his eyes were all over you as his tongue practically fell from his mouth so you rounded the lounger to stand in front of him but only when you touched his shoulders did he reach out to touch you.

Your knees buckled as soon as his fingertips touched the back of your thighs but thankfully he was able to steer you onto his lap and as you sat on his leg he moved his hands to your waist. Your skin tingling in their wake as he touched parts of you he’d never seen before and even though Mason could be shy and reserved about his feelings, this was the best indication you’d ever had that he found you attractive.

He was looking at you through his glasses but you missed his pretty brown eyes so you carefully pushed them up so you could see them again. Watching as the sun reflected in them so they looked like deep pots of honey and the creases around his eyes made your heart thump as he smiled at you. He was looking at you so softly and you couldn't help but reach down to kiss him as it was only Freddie and Lex out here and you knew they didn’t care and probably were even looking.

‘You’re so fucking hot’ he breathed against your lips and his words excited you as he squeezed your sides. His potty mouth making you giggle but you were glad you had saved yourself from showing him your body until now just for this reaction. ‘You’re making this impossible for me’

‘Sorry Mase’ you giggled feeling him slip his thumb under the waistband of your bottoms so he could hold your bum and even though he was pushing it you let him. ‘I wore red just for you’

‘I bet you did’ he grinned, pulling you back in for a kiss that made you want to abandon all your morals and take him back to your room, but you held strong. Pulling away gently even though you didn’t want to.

‘Speaking of hot, it’s boiling out here. Did you make sure to put sunscreen on?’ You asked. Slightly trying to distract the pair of you from a heated make out session and Mason sent you a smug smile as he realised what you were doing.

‘I did, just not on my back my arms don’t reach’ he joked, giggles falling from both your lips at the thought of him trying to do it.

‘Come on then I’ll help you you smiled. Kissing him once before before getting up off his lap and just as you’d got your sun cream from your bag he’d whipped his shirt off.

There were pictures of Mason's body online that you’d seen recently and you thought he might be in pretty good shape but it was nothing compared to the actual thing. His chest and tummy covered with a light smattering of hair that was driving you insane but his defined abs and strong arms were more sexy to you than anything else until he turned around to flash you his back dimples.

You took your time rubbing his cream in for him but it was mainly just an excuse to touch him. Planning a kiss in between his shoulder blades when you realised it had been long enough before the pair of you flopped back onto the lounger. Pinkies intertwined once more as you soaked up the sun but it was around 45 minutes later when you realised you needed to cool off

‘Do you fancy going for a swim?’ You asked him, watching his brows raise above his galssss questioningly but he was quick to take them off and help you up so you could get in together. You taking the safe option and walking over to the steps but just as you turned to get you watched Mason dive bomb in.

‘That's colder than I thought it would be’ he chuckled after he came up for air, wading his way over to help you in fully but after a few moments of swimming you’d had enough and wanted him to carry you.

He wasn’t shocked when you came over and placed your hands on his shoulders but you knew he was unsure as to where to put his hands when you wrapped your legs around his waist.

‘Hold my waist’ you giggled as you knew he needed a little direction. ‘Are you blushing Mr Mount?’

‘Never’ he chuckled, pulling you impossibly closer and he tucked his head into your neck. Inhaling deeply before looking back at you and you knew what he was about to ask before he did it.

‘Can I kiss you?’

‘You don’t have to ask’

‘I’m just checking’ he laughed. Bumping his nose against yours before he kissed you softly and you knew he was about to pull away quicker than you wanted him to so you cupped the back of his head and deepened it before he got a chance.

You stayed in the pool longer than you’d first intended to. Mason requesting that you race him a few times before he popped you on his back and you used to opportunity to cover his cheeks in kisses until he swung you back round to his front so you could hold each other again.

You were so calm and tranquil in Masons arms that the sound of someone shouting made you jump. You could feel Mason had tensed too and when you both looked over to the source of the noise Mason didn’t relax at all. If anything he clung to you tighter as Carl and his little gaggle of girls made their way over to sit with Freddie and it was like Mason's demeanour switched before your eyes.

‘You okay?’ You whispered, watching him shrink into himself a little but with a quick kiss to his lips he was nodding gently. ‘Shall we get out and get dry?’

You were both soon out. Sitting back next to Freddie but the opposite side of Carl and you noticed how even after he was dry he still had his towel around his shoulders. You didn’t say anything at first but after you’d reapplied your sunscreen you figured he might want some more too however he was still wrapped up.

‘You want me to oil you up?’ You joked, waving the suncream in his face and even though he laughed he shook his head at you.

‘No thanks, I’ll probably put my shirt on again in a sec’

‘What? Why?’ You asked but he didn’t answer so you took it upon yourself to crawl over into his lap and when his hand squeezed your thigh you sent him a cheeky smile.

‘You know for someone who wanted to keep things on the down low you’re very touchy’

‘Well you should stop being so irresistible then’ you joked watching his face flush. ‘You can put your top back on if you want but has something happened? You were fine before?’

‘It’s nothing, I’m just being silly’

‘No it’s okay. I’m just thinking about you, you know? The last thing you want is a T-shirt tan’ you winked and the small laugh that fell from his lips made you feel accomplished.

‘Somethings telling me that’s not the only reason’

‘I mean yeah I’ve got eyes Mase’ you chuckled, watching him try to hold back a smirk and from the way his eyes dropped to your lips you knew he wanted to kiss you.

His kisses were becoming more than addictive. Slow and sweet as he stroked his tongue against yours but it was the feeling of his thumbs brushing against your back that was making you shiver. Cupping his jaw so he couldn’t pull away from you but the loud and obnoxious laughs of Carl and the girls were going through you like nails on a chalkboard.

‘Would you like an ice-cream?’ You asked him as you pulled away, his face turning into one of confused amusement before he let out a little laugh.

‘It’s 11:30’

‘Exactly, we need to start early to get in as many as we can’ you told him. ‘Come on we can go for a walk or something after I just need some peace’ you smiled at him, knowing he needed the same so you quickly popped on a coverup as he chucked his shirt back on before taking his hand and leading him away from everyone else.

You knew the hotel had a rooftop bar and after some careful searching you managed to find it. Thankfully it was quiet up there and after grabbing you both an ice cream you took a seat next to him and placed your hand on his thigh.

‘The view up here is crazy’ you commented, looking out over the hotel grounds and to the beach but little did you know Mason had something else in his eyeline.

‘Yeah not too bad from here either’ he said softly, looking back at you with literal heart eyes and when you winked back at him he just laughed.

‘Cheeky’ you commented, nudging your shoulder with his. ‘We can stay away from everyone else today if you’d like’

‘No don’t be silly. I mean I love it when it’s just us but you’re meant to be here with them’

‘I’ve got the two days with them solidly Mase, I want to be with you’

‘C’mere then’ he whispered. Pulling you further into his side before resting his head on top of yours as you nuzzled into his neck. His scent overtaking your senses but all you could do was squeeze him harder until he was laughing. ‘I still can’t believe what you’re wearing’

You’d never seen him look at you like this before. It wasn’t that you didn’t think he was attracted to you at all, he always called you gorgeous and you knew you made him a bit nervous but you’d never seen him look at you like he wanted to rip your clothes off and have you right then and there like he was now. His hands massaging over your thighs as he kissed your jaw and you could feel your tummy flipping with desire.

You’d wanted him for a while, not able to get the image of him having his way with you out of your head for a week or two now but you’d still made him wait. Almost like it was a test to see how long you could give him before he went crazy but at this point it was you that had lost it. Your kisses had become messier and deeper as you got lost in each other and you knew it was only a matter of time you gave him the green light.

You kept it pg for the rest of the day though. Joining the others for lunch before you were back out by the pool and you watched Mason relax as he spent some time with Woody and Freddie until he came back to you for a nap. His head resting on you chest as your fingers brushed though his hair and you felt yourself falling for him even more with every passing second.

‘Come stay in my room tonight?’ He asked after you’d all been to dinner that evening. The pair of you not wanting to part and when you raised your eyebrow at him cheekily his face flushed as he giggled. ‘Not like that. I’m just not ready to let you go yet. I thought I could get us another drink and we could hang out? I know we’ve not slept in the same bed before or whatever and we don't have to if you’re uncomfortable but-

You cut him off with a kiss. Feeling him relax under your fingertips as he smiled and when you pulled away you knew he was blushing even deeper.

‘I’ll be in soon, okay? Why don’t you get us some snacks and find a movie for us’

‘Okay’ he whispered ‘Bring your stuff for tomorrow too, you can get ready in here’

‘Wow, you’re bossy when you wanna be huh?’ you chuckled. ‘Who knew you could ask for what you want sometimes?’ You smiled and with a quick kiss you were running back to your room to get everything you needed for your first little sleepover with him.

y/n recently added to their stories

Mason treated you to a late breakfast again the next morning before you met everyone else at the entrance just before lunch. Your pinky firmly wrapped around his as you approached the others and you noticed Freddie’s eyes snap down to look at them before they were on you. Sending you a smile and a cheeky wink like he was happy for you and even though you rolled your eyes at him you couldn’t deny you were pretty happy yourself.

You’d enjoyed the night before more than any other time you could imagine. Spending the whole night in Mason's arms as you spoke and kissed until you eventually fell asleep. You had wondered in the back of your head if last night could have been the night but you both seemed content with leaving it for now however you knew it would be soon.

Whilst you stood and reminisced in your own head as you waited for the last few people, Mason on the other hand had his eyes on someone else. Watching the way Carl drunk you in before his eyes landed on your conjoined fingers and the expression that took over his face was one that Mason had seen many times before. Almost watching Carl plot his evil scheme was making Mason uncomfortable to the point he started to pull away from you but you just assumed he wanted to hold your hand properly so you threaded your fingers through his and pulled him along into the awaiting taxi.

You’d never been on a boat like this and with there being so many of you it was hard to find a quiet spot. Mason seemed to know his way around these things though and took you up to the top deck where there was a separate space at the front for the two of you to lay down and get comfy.

You could hear everyone else downstairs rushing about and being silly but you were content with laying next to Mason. Your head right next to his as you spoke about the night before until you both got a bit sleepy and drifted off.

You heard the jet skis start up before you heard the footsteps running up to the top deck. Freddie’s face appearing from below but clearly only you had the energy to sit up and speak to him.

‘Not interrupting, am I kid?’ He asked quietly.

‘No, he’s just a bit tired’

‘Oh yeah, you worn him out?’ he laughed. Eyebrows wiggling suggestively but you just laughed as you hid your face in embarrassment.

‘Shut up Freddie’ you huffed, crossing your arms in mock anger but he saw right through you. ‘What do you want?

‘Jet skis are ready, you wanted a go right?’

‘Well yeah but-‘

‘Mason!’

‘Freddie, will you piss off’ you scalded. Look down to see Mason stirring awake as Freddie’s retreated back down the ladder and when you brushed the hair from his eyes he gave you a thankful but sleepy smile. ‘Sorry Mase, I told him not to wake you’

‘It’s alright, beautiful. Is everything okay?’

‘Yeah, the jet skis are ready but if you don’t want to do it, it’s fine’ you told him. Leaning onto your side so you could lay yourself next to him whilst he slunk his arm under your body to hold you closer with his hand on your waist.

‘I best not, I’ll get killed if I get another injury but you go yeah? I’ll watch you’

‘Are you sure?

‘Of course. Or maybe I’ll be asleep who knows’ he winked. ‘Go on, go have fun’ he whispered, pecking your lips as he squeezed your bum gently. Winking at you as you looked at him with a shocked face as it was the first time he’d been handsy with you without you instigating something but you just kissed him forcefully as you crawled over his body and left him to relax.

By the time you’d made it down and popped your life vest on, there were only a few people left. Woody and Kaz had just set off as Lex hopped on the back of Freddie’s meaning you were left with only one option.

Carl was smiling at you as he waved you over to the one he was standing by before hopping aboard and patting the back of the seat for you to sit on. ‘Your chariot awaits. I hope you don’t mind but we’ve got to share’ he laughed.

‘Oh no that’s fine’ you smiled. Too excited to get out onto the water to worry about who you were with and whilst Mason was a bit distant with Carl you didn’t exactly have a reason to not go with him. Yes he’d been loud with the girls yesterday and there was definitely something you couldn’t put your finger on about him that you weren’t 100% comfortable with but the idea of getting to go in a jet ski was the main thought in your brain right now.

‘Just tell me if I’m going too fast, okay?’ He told you. Letting you get comfortable behind him as you wrapped your arms around his waist like Freddie had shown you and once you were comfortable enough he set off.

Carl played it pretty safe and didn’t go too fast but it was fast enough for you. Having to grip o to him tightly as he tried out some spins and tricks and before you knew it he’d slyly driven you far away from the boat and everyone else.

‘So you and Mason huh?’ He asked as he slowed down. Bringing the jet ski to almost a complete stop before he was driving you around in random patterns to make it look like you were going somewhere when you weren’t.

‘What about me and Mason?’ You asked. Wondering why he was bringing Mason up whilst you were basically stranded in the sea and an uncomfortable feeling made its way up your spine.

‘You tell me. He’s keeping things under wraps’ he shrugged and you felt the sense of unease spread over you further. ‘Look, all l I know is that if you were mine I would be all over you. He looks like he barely wants to hold you hand sometimes’

‘Well I’m not yours so it doesn’t matter does it’ you hit back. Not liking how he was talking to you and the fact he seemed to be taking you further away from everyone made you want to scream in fear.

‘Oh she’s a feisty one’

‘No I just like to keep my business my business as does Mason’ you told him firmly. Wishing you could go back in time so you would have never gotten on this god forsaken thing in the first place and. ‘Can you take me back now please I want to get off

‘Oh don’t be like that’

‘I won’t ask again’ you told him firmly. Trying to hide the fear in your voice but thankfully he got the hint and made his way back to the boat where you hopped off as soon as you could before making your way back to Mason. Hearing Carl thankfully speed away leaving the pair of you alone.

Mason wasn't napping where you'd left him, in fact he was nowhere to be seen but as you made your way to the back of the boat you could see him leaning up against the side with a pensive look on his face.

You didn't know if you wanted to join him as he looked so in his own head but you fought against it and carefully made your way over. Needing his comfort after the ordeal Carl had just put you through but Mason looked as though he was in a whole other world.

'Mase? What you doing over here?' You asked. Watching him jump slightly as he realised you were there before his eyes were on the floor.

'I was feeling a bit sea sick' he told you quietly and you noticed how he didn’t really want to look at you.

'So you thought it was best to hang over the edge and make it worse' you smiled but he didn't smile back. Just shrugged his shoulders gently as he twiddled with his fingers.

'Sorry'

'It's alright, don't be sorry' you smiled. Pulling him into a hug and even though he was hugging you back you knew something was off. You chalked it down to him not feeling well and when you pulled back you could see in his eyes that something wasn't right. 'Shall I get you a bottle of water and we can sit somewhere quiet’

'No it's okay, I don't wanna pull you away from everyone’

'Mase? You know l'd pick you over anyone here' you told him. Pulling back and cupping his jaw so he'd look at you and when he sent you a smile your heart settled just a tiny bit.

'Even Freddie?'

'Especially Freddie’ you winked. 'Come on, I'll look after you. They're all still out on the jet skis so it's just you and me anyway. Can't get rid of me even if you want to’

‘Thank you’

‘Don’t be, it’s my job to look after my man’ you joked. His eyes lighting up at the way you’d referred to him as such. ‘Shall we go back up? Or do you wanna stay down here?

‘We can go up’ he whispered. Pulling you into a soft kiss that made your knees weak before leading you back up.

When everyone else came back, Woody and Kaz joined you upstairs. Mason sitting up and patting the space in front of him so you’d sit with your back to his chest and when he lazily slung his arm around your waist you blushed as he began to trace patterns on your warm skin.

You knew you were staying on the boast for most of the day so you remembered to take things to entertain yourself and you’d noticed Mason had perked up a little bit. Watching him jump off the edge with Freddie as you sat with the girls and when the option came to leave with some of the others or stay for a bit longer you both chose to stay. Thankfully it was just Freddie, Lex, Woody and Kaz left with you as Carl left with the others and when the sun began to set you made sure to take Mason back upstairs so you could watch it together. Laying on his body had his hands roamed yours and as soon as the sun began to hug the sea he brought you In for a heart stopping kiss.

The day had been perfect, his hand in yours and he sat next to you on the way back to the hotel and your heart thumped at how he was playing with your fingers. His cheek resting on the top of your head and it was almost a struggle to stay awake with how warm and safe you felt with him.

As much as you didn’t like it, you both decided you should sleep in your own beds tonight. Both of you having early mornings and you knew if you woke up next to him you wouldn’t want to go anywhere so Mason walked you to your door and left you with a kiss and the promise of seeing you tomorrow evening.

y/n recently added to their stories

Mason was up and out at the crack of dawn but you were reading over his good morning text in the lobby with a smile before you felt someone looming over you.

‘Listen, I’m not sure what Masons said about me’

‘He hasn’t said anything about you’ you told Carl and to be fair to Mason he really hadn’t. Mason did his talking with his eyes about Carl and you could sense there was something there but hadn’t come out and told you exactly what the problem was.

‘Oh… I just feel like we got off on the wrong foot. I’m sorry if I made you feel uncomfortable yesterday on the jet ski, I didn’t mean to. Mason and I like to tease each other a bit but I should have left you out of it’ he explained and whilst you appreciated his apology you still felt like something wasn’t right.

Unfortunately you were stuck with him for today, the group of you practically had been halved since it was just your work people and there was no way of getting away from him so you decided you put yesterday behind you for the sake of everyone else and try and make it a comfortable day.

‘Well thank you, I appreciate that. I guess we can start over again and be civil at least today’ you nodded at him and he sent you an appreciative smile that made you feel better about what you were doing.

You sat next to Carl in the cab and he was asking you lots of questions about your work. Ever since Masons shoot the offers to join people and help out with big projects had been rolling in like no tomorrow and you’d even managed to book a few private fittings to dress some actors for an awards ceremony in a few weeks. You hadn’t felt this positive about work in months and with Carl bigging you up like he was it was easy to get swept up in him.

The event was busier than you were expecting so you stuck with Woody and Freddie however that meant Carl was now also with you and wherever he was you knew Lindsay and Louise weren’t too far behind.

‘Right the agency wants some pictures for socials so just act natural okay?’ Freddie announced, whipping his phone out as you walked around the various stalls and exhibitions. Snapping your picture whenever he could however Carl was always jumping in to be involved and when you sat down for the first runway show he was right there next to you.

Carl wanting to be your bestie aside, you’d had an amazing day and met so many lovely people. You felt inspired at every corner you turned and you couldn't wait to see Mason and tell him all about it. It was nuts how much you missed him even with so much going on and the fact you couldn’t even get your phone out to send him a quick text to see how he was frustrating you more than anything.

TheFashionPeople

location : Malta

liked by y/n, Freddie_Smith, Carl9834 and others

TheFashionPeople A group of our extremely talented stylists and personal shoppers have been in Malta at the New In Clothing 2024 event. Make sure to follow us to keep up to date with everything they get up to!

A hand on your waist snapped you out of your thoughts and you recoiled away from Carl just like you’d been doing for the last few hours. You were sure why but he’d suddenly got it in his head that he was free to put his hands on you and whilst it started out as just gentle touches on your shoulder or elbow it had progressed quickly holding your waist or trying to pull you in for a cuddle.

‘Can you not, please Carl. I don’t like being touched’

‘What? I’m just trying to be nice’

‘Well that’s not how I’m seeing it. I would appreciate it if you kept your hands to yourself please’ you told him sternly before marching off to find Freddie. Wishing you would have just told him to piss off this morning rather than trying to be friendly for everyone else’s sake.

You were back in the hotel by the time you managed to get five minutes' peace. Knowing you had to go to dinner soon but you wanted to hopefully speak to Mason however you were a little disappointed that he hadn’t messaged you at all today. You figured he must have been busy like you so you sent him a quick message before jumping in the shower.

You were all dressed up and ready to head to dinner but Mason still hadn’t got back to you so you made a plan to swing by his room before you left. He didn’t answer when you knocked on the door though and you figured he must still be out so you went to dinner alone and tried to ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of your tummy.

‘Have you heard from Mason?’ You asked Woody. Wanting to make sure someone had spoken to him as you were beginning to panic that he’d vanished off the face of the earth but the Woody nodded you didn’t know if you felt happy or sad about it.

‘Yeah he messaged me about half an hour ago’ he told you. ‘He’s not been back long so maybe be fell asleep?’

‘Oh okay’ you smiled. Confused as to why he was seemingly ignoring for hours on end but you knew he loved a nap so maybe that was the reason.

‘Is everything alright?’ Woody asked sympathetically but you didn’t want to air everything out in front of everyone so you kept quiet whilst still telling the truth.

‘Yeah fine’ you smiled. Hoping to convince him nothing was wrong but you weren’t sure if he bought it. ‘I just wanted to check he was okay, I haven’t heard from him in a bit’

‘You know what he’s like, dead to the world as soon as his head touches the pillow’’ he reassured you and you sent him a kind smile and a nod in hopes that was enough. Watching him quickly send a message to someone and no more than two minutes later did your phone buzz in your hand.

Your heart sunk further into your tummy at his message. You didn’t know if you were being extra sensitive or he was being incredibly short with you but his message didn’t feel as warm as they usually did and now you felt silly for telling him you missed him without him saying it back.

‘Right, you coming for drinks kid?’ Freddie asked but you just shook your head as you gathered your things together.

‘No I think I’ll just head back to my room’ you gulped. Watching Freddie’s face drop before he looked at you to ask if something was wrong but you just sent him a smile. ‘Its been a long day and I wanna be fresh for tomorrow’

‘You sure?’

‘Positive’ you nodded giving everyone a quick goodbye before hightailing back to your room. Wondering what you should send Mason as a response but in the end you figured you’d play it as cool as possible and send him something you normally would to see how he reacted.

You didn’t understand why he was being so hot and cold with you constantly this trip and you definitely didn’t understand what you could have done to make him be this cold with you.

Sleep didn’t come easy that night as you laid awake and thought about what had happened on the trip so far to make him be like this. Clearly there was some sort of issue with Carl but if he didn’t explain what it was then how were you supposed to help him? And everything seemed fine the previous night before you went to bed so what could you have done in a day that you hadn’t seen him for him to be so distant?

You knew you had to speak to him tomorrow and soon enough the tiredness wore you out enough so you could fall asleep but the next you decided to test him and not send him a good morning text when you woke up. You knew it may have been a little petty but you wanted him to come to you first, almost to prove that he still liked you but you were almost halfway through the morning and it was still radio silence. Thankfully Carl had kept his distance today but you knew he kept looking at you in hopes you’d give him some attention.

The final show was was a lot, and being sat far away from Carl helped you concentrate a bit more but Mason was still on your mind. Why was be being so distant? Hopefully you’d get to speak to him later today and you were both excited and terrified about seeing him. Thankfully Freddie had managed to take your mind off of things and invited you backstage after the show with Woody as he knew one of the models and you found it fascinating getting to watch them all at work

‘Thank you for bringing me here, Freddie. I’ve had the best time’

‘Don’t be silly, I knew you’d love it. And when we get back I’ve got loads for us to work on’ he smiled. Wrapping and arm around your shoulder as you made your way back to the hotel and even though things with Mason seemed confusing and weird you knew everything you’d been working towards was finally happening for you and you couldn’t wait to get to work.

You were sitting on your own away from everyone at the pool that afternoon when Mason turned up. You hadn’t meant to be but you were sat with Woody and Kaz and they had just hopped in the water and you thought Mason would be straight over to see you since it had been so long but again you were left disappointed.

He’d clearly been back to his room to shower and change but he didn’t make his way over to see you first. Watching him drop his things on the lounger on the opposite side of the pool from you before talking to Woody for a bit as he sat on the edge but he was getting in the pool soon enough. Your heart sinking at the way he’d completely blanked you since coming out here and you wondered if you’d missed something. Eventually turning onto your side away from everyone to not show them how upset you were as you couldn't understand his behaviour and why he hadn’t come over to say hello to you first.

You’d been away from him for just over a day and a half and all you wanted was to be next to him again so the fact he’d basically ignored you when this was your first chance to speak made your head spin. Were you being too much for him? Is that why he was pulling away from you? Or were you not giving him what he wanted quickly enough and he was getting bored of waiting for you? Did he not miss you like you’d missed him?

You refused to cry but you knew your eyes felt heavy and watery. Shutting them and pretending to be asleep even though you could hear him giggling close by, it was soon replaced by the sounds of hushed whispers and soon enough you could hear the sound of someone getting out of the pool and making their way over to you.

You didn’t react to him, hearing him pick a towel up to dry his hair before he took a tentative seat next to you and when you didn’t move you felt him lay next to you but still kept his distance so you didn't touch at all. Your heart hammering as you became hyper aware of all his movements but you kept your eyes shut no matter how hard it was becoming.

You could feel him fiddling with the dangly bits on your bikini before his fingers grazed your thigh slightly and you froze. He didn’t stop though, trailing his fingers up and over your hip to your waist so he could pull you into his body and when your skin touched his you opened your eyes carefully.

‘Hey’ he whispered. The weight of the world still heavy in his eyes but you knew he was trying to cover it up with the soft smile he was sending you. ‘Sorry, I didn’t want to get you wet’ he whispered, stroking your back gently and you knew there was something still off about him even though he was keeping it well hidden behind the brick wall he’d been building for the last few days. At least he was talking to you now though you thought. ‘You okay?’

‘Just tired’ you nodded. Not wanting to give too much away and let him know how upset you were but every touch of his skin on yours made you ache.

‘Go back to sleep, I’ll stay with you’

You wanted to tell him you weren’t really tired and that you didn’t want to sleep because you missed him and wanted to talk but the words were stuck in your throat. Not even sure if you were allowed to shuffle closer to him but at least he was finally next to you and when he gave in to pull you into his chest your eyes began to sting.

There was so much you wanted to say to him, but you held your tongue. Taking what he was giving you at the moment and soon enough your missed sleep from the night before caught up to you and you fell asleep to the feel of him pressing a gentle kiss to your temple.

Waking up still in Mason's arms was a nice feeling even if you did still feel heavy with emotion and when you both sat up he made no attempt to hold you in any way again until your leg brushed his and placed his hand in your lap palm up. Silently asking you to hold it and as soon as your fingers were linked you rested your head on his shoulder.

‘Are you coming to dinner with everyone tonight?’ You asked. Trying to think of anything to say to get him talking as he was keeping quiet and you hated the awkward silence.

‘I think so’ he told you. ‘Is that okay?’

‘Of course it is’ you nodded, looking up at his face and as much as you wanted to stay with him and get him to talk but you knew the time was getting on. ‘I should go get ready actually. I need to wash my hair and shower’

‘Okay, shall I meet you there then?’ He asked and your heart dropped once more. Why didn’t he want to meet you before? To turn up with you like you’d done earlier in the week? It was only small but it was like he didn’t want to be seen with you and you had no idea what was going on in that little head of his. Right here by the pool in front of everyone wasn’t exactly the best place to ask though so you just sent him a small nod before gathering up your things and leaving.

‘Trouble in paradise?’ You heard from behind you as you made your way to the door and you didn’t even need to turn to face them to know who it was. You’d been avoiding him like the plague since you told him off for touching you yesterday and you’d been waiting for him to start widning you up again.

‘Fuck off, Carl’

‘Ohhhh, someone’s touchy. I don’t know why you’re bothering with him, I can see he’s not interested from a mile away. Why are you wasting your time you’ve got someone right here ready to give you what you want’

‘Cause I don’t fucking want you!’ you snapped. Turning to face him suddenly and you knew you’d caught him off guard. ‘Ever think of that?’

‘Of course you do, everyone does’ he told you matter of factly, looking at you dumbfounded at the fact you might not want him but you didn’t want to waste another second of your life in his presence.

‘Oh bore off, I’m done talking to you’ you huffed. Turning in the corridor and making you way to your room and thankfully he didn’t follow you.

All you could think about was Mason as you showered and dried your hair. Was he not interested anymore? Or were you being sensitive as Carl just made everything seem 10x worse.

You wanted to talk to him before dinner so you could get to the crux of the issue, knowing that if you left things any longer than needed it could take a turn and it wasnt like he was mad at you. He just seemed sad almost, and distant and since you were ready earlier than planned you wondered if it was worth a shot to go and find him.

You’d saved this dress specifically for tonight. Your last big dinner out with everyone and you wanted to look the part and hopefully catch Mason's eye a bit. Even if that did feel like an impossible task right now.

You needed an excuse to talk to him and this seemed the perfect one. Not being able to quite get the zipper done up without some help so you did it enough to be able to leave your room and not flash anyone before making your way down the hall to his door.

As you didn’t fancy standing in the middle of the corridor half dressed you knocked rather quickly in hopes he would come and answer faster and soon enough he opened up with a small but shocked smile on his face.

‘Hey Mase, sorry I’m having a bit of trouble with my dress. I don't suppose you could zip me up?’ You asked and after he quickly nodded you in, you made your way into his room.

‘Thank you’ you smiled. Standing in front of his big mirror so he could zip you up and the feeling of his hand on your waist as his knuckles brushed your skin made your knees weak. Watching him in the mirror in front of you as he concentrated made your heart race and once he was done and you caught his eye in the mirror you knew you needed to step it up a notch.

You figured you’d act as normal as possible with him, turning in his hold to face him and when you placed a quick peck on his lips you noticed again he didn’t deepen it or even return it but just looked to the floor blankly.

‘Mase, what’s wrong?’ You sighed. Pulling out of his grasp as his hands fell to his sides with a thud and you knew your question had shocked him. His eyes going wide as his face paled but you were determined to not let him brush this off as nothing.

‘What do you mean?’

‘You’ve barely spoken to me for the last few days, you haven’t kissed me. Have I done something wrong?’ You asked and even though you didn’t mean for it to, your voice sounded teary and upset. This seemed to be enough to snap Mason out of his funk a little bit as he looked at you guiltily before gently pulling you back into his arms.

‘No, you haven’t done anything I promise’ he whispered. Stroking your back with his thumbs like he always did and you felt yourself settle in a way you hadn’t for days. It was like your Mason was back as he touched you like normal so you placed your hands on his chest before he pulled you closer.

‘What is it then? Do you not like me anymore?’ You questioned but his face dropped even further. Clearly it hitting him how upset you were by his mood over the last few days.

‘Hey, no. Don’t say that, I adore you’ he told you sincerely, cupping your jaw so you’d look at him but it didn’t explain why he’d been off with you. ‘I’m just a bit embarrassed

‘Embarrassed? What of me?’

‘No not you’ he laughed, looking at you with a heartfelt smile before his face dropped again. ‘Of me. I just got into my own head about something and I feel a little ridiculous’

‘Tell me’ you whispered, trying to reassure him that whatever it is things would be fine but you had no idea what it was he could be embarrassed of. ‘What did I tell you that night, huh? I’m big on communication. So just tell me and we can figure it out’

You could tell Mason wanted to tell you. Watching him inhaling a deep breath before letting it out shakily. Swallowing down a nervous gulp as he placed both hands back on your waist and you knew he was about to hit you with it.

‘Do you like him?’

‘Like who?’ You questioned, unsure of what he meant and the name that fell from his lips made no sense to you at all.

‘Carl’

‘What? Where did you get that idea?’ You laughed but you realised it wasn't a laughing matter for him but a genuine concern.

‘Ive seen the way he looks at you and he was making you laugh in all those pictures your company posted on instagram like he was next you in every bloody one and then you were on that jet ski together before and I just…’

‘Mase’ you smiled. Moving your hands to around his neck before bumping your nose against his to get him to look at you. ‘Are you jealous?’

‘What? I’m not jealous’ he scoffed, a small smile on his lips as he realised he probably sounded a bit silly but little did you know you only had half the story.

‘Tell your face that then’ you joked but you knew he needed a little reassurance. ‘For the record no, I don’t like him. If you’d have taken any notice of me you would have seen I’ve been nowhere near him when I don’t have to be. He’s an arrogant twat who doesn’t know when to keep his hands to himself’

‘What?’ He snapped, pulling back to look at you with his hands gripping you your waist tighter and you could tell he was angry about what you’d said.

‘It’s fine, I handled it’

‘I should of handled it’ he murmured ‘You’re mine and it’s my job to look after you’

‘Yours huh?’ You smiled, your heart fluttering at the way the words sounded coming out of his mouth.

‘What did he do? Tell me’ he asked, brushing past what he’d said but his nose was turning pink out of embarrassment and even though you wanted to talk more about being his, you also knew you needed to talk about this more.

‘Nothing bad, just kept putting his hands on me you know? Like on my arms and round my waist when we were at the event. We had a chat in the morning and agreed we’d be civil that day but he went way overboard and made me uncomfortable’

‘What do you mean, be civil? I thought you two got on?’

‘Well if you hadn’t been in a strop for a few days you would have seen we don’t’ you smiled. ‘When I went with him on the jet ski it was just because it was the last space left and all he did was piss me off. Kept talking about us after I asked him not to before he tried to tell me how he’d treat me but I told him that I wasn’t interested. I’m still pissed off he ruined my turn. I'd been looking forward to that’ you huffed but now you’d explained yourself you were waiting for Mason to get to the root of the issue. ‘Why don’t you like him? You can tell me’

‘He’s just not my kind of people’ he shrugged, trying to brush past it again, but you gave him a firm look which made him roll his eyes with a sigh. ‘Oh fine, but I’m gonna sound insane. He’s always been Woodys mate but I’ve known who he is and he’s got this weird thing against me. Whatever I have he’s gotta have the same, and that includes girls. We’d go on nights out and I’d be talking to someone and then the next thing I know he’s wormed his way in. Even girls I’d been talking to for weeks he’d find a way to take from me somehow and I just got tired of him always butting in. I haven’t had to think about him in Manchester but seeing I’m him again just put me on edge’

‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ You whispered. Stroking his neck with your thumbs as your hands rested on his shoulders and you couldn’t help but feel sad for Mason. You didn’t like that he’d kept this all bottled up inside but now you knew what his problem was you could face it together.

‘I’ve never told anyone’ he shrugged. ‘He’s mates with all my mates and I don’t wanna rock the boat. But also cause it felt a little pathetic. Like it’s a weird thing to explain to people but I thought I wouldn’t have to worry about him getting to you’

‘Mason, you know I’m all about you, don’t you?’ You whispered. Watching his face soften as he gave you a lopsided smile and you knew all he needed right now was a bit of reassurance. ‘You don’t think i'd have kissed you in front of everyone, or slept in your bed the first night if I wasn’t nuts about you. I’m not that kinda girl’

‘I know you’re not’ he laughed. ‘It was never you I wasn’t sure about, it’s him he just brings out the worst in me. And I wasn’t jealous… I was scared’

‘Scared of what? Me leaving you for him?’

‘A little bit’ he whispered and your heart thumped at how vulnerable he was being with you. ‘I feel so dumb even admitting that but he’s done it to me before with girls I was just talking to, so the fact we’re more than that, I knew he’d jump in and do something stupid. It didn’t help that you’re not actually mine’ he muttered under his breath but you just about heard him. Tilting your head quizzically at him as he turned red in the face. ‘You know we’re not like… together officially or whatever. I wanted to ask you while we were away, you know? Make you my girl like I said I would’

‘You wanna be my boyfriend’ you teased, smiling wildly at his confession and his face soon mirrored yours as he smiled back.

‘Oh give over’ he scoffed before his face softened once more. ‘Have I ruined it?’

‘Not at all’

‘So if I were to ask you, like to be mine, would you say yes?’ He asked nervously, his eyes all over your face as he tried to decipher your reaction but you just smiled at him as you hoped he’d know what your answer would be.

‘Why don’t you try right now’

‘Cause I’m scared’ he whispered. Holding you tight to his body as he rested his forehead on yours.

‘What are you scared of?’ You asked, laughing a little bit at how silly he was being but you were just hoping you were coming across not as nervous as you were feeling in this second.

‘You’ he laughed. ‘I really like you and I really think we could be something you know? I like us’

‘I like us too’ you told him. Letting him take a deep breath to calm himself as you knew this was a lot for him. ‘Mase? If you did want to ask, the answer would be yes. I really like you too’

‘I’ll think about it’ he laughed shyly before you lent in to kiss his cheek. ‘You haven’t poked me in the ribs yet so I wasn’t sure’

‘And once again, you're insane’ you told him before you were pulling him into a soft kiss. Feeling him kiss you back properly after so long as your chest fluttered at the way he was holding you. Soft but strong and the way he stroked your skin with his thumbs made you want to melt into a pool of goo on the floor. ‘Come on, you’re not getting out of having dinner with me tonight. I want you sat next to me’ you demanded with a smile.

‘I’m coming I’m coming’ he laughed. Pulling you into one last hug before pulling away from you but holding you at arm's length with your hands still entwined.

‘Hey, y/n?’

‘Yeah?’

‘You look beautiful’ he whispered. His voice sincere as his eyes trailed over you but you were quick to kiss him as you felt your face flush.

‘Thank you Mason’ you whispered against his lips. Feeling happier than you had in days.

Dinner tonight was at the hotel and when the pair of you arrived hand in hand it revived a mixed reaction. Most people paid you no mind but Freddie was sending you a sly smile.

Then there was Carl, sending the pair of you daggers as his gaze shot to your hands. Eyes rolling in the back of his head that you two were together but little did he know he had front row seats to the best show in town.

The only two seats were thankfully as far away from Carl as you could get. Right in between Freddie and woody and after Mason pulled your chair out you gave him a quick kiss right in Carls eyeline.

‘What are you doing’ Mason laughed, cheeks flaming at the way you’d kissed him so publicly but you just sent him a reassuring smile.

‘Claiming you. Buckle up cause this is nothing’ you winked. Kissing his lips softly again before taking your seat and staring down Carl in the process.

You knew he was watching you the whole time. Lindsay and Louise either side of him as he quietly stewed and now you knew how awful he made Mason feel you were ready to make him feel the same.

All notions of ‘on the down low’ were out the window as he draped his arm over the back of your chair. Letting you lean into him and kiss him as much as you wanted whilst you sporadically fed each other. It was driving Carl up the wall and you loved how Mason was playing along and winking at you everytime you went a little overboard.

‘I heard the sunset is gonna be insane tonight’ Freddie mentioned as you were finishing up and with one look at Mason you knew what was coming. ‘How’s about you see if you can get us a table on the rooftop bar’ he winked but Mason just rolled his eyes with a laugh.

‘I kind of have one already booked’ he told him, looking down at you with a wink and you knew he’d booked it for just the two of you. ‘I’ll see if I can get a few people added though’

By the time Mason got back the table had cleared out, just Freddie and Woody with their girls left and Carl had stormed off in a huff much to your delight.

‘Right, I can only get an extra four seats’

‘That’s fine, six of us six seats’ Freddie winked. ‘The others have left so we don’t need to worry about them’

‘You don’t mind do you?’ Mason asked. Placing his hand on your waist before dropping a kiss on your forehead. ‘I wanted it to be just us’

‘I don’t mind’ you whispered. ‘Come on, it’ll be fun’

Thankfully the table they’d arranged for you was in the corner out of the way but right near front so you had an uninterrupted view of the beach and the sunset and as you all sat and chatted away you couldn't have felt happier if you’d tried.

You’d always found it hard to make friends at school and work but you were honestly so thankful for Freddie. Not only for all his help in furthering your career but he’d just been the best person to you and you were so happy you’d got to spend this time away together to build on your friendship.

You’d grown to adore Lex just as much, forming a girly alliance with her and Kaz over the few days you’d been here and you knew that when you were back home the three of you would be hanging out regularly. As well as getting to know Woody a little more and you knew he’d been pushing Mason not to be such a grump with you which you appreciated.

Then there was Mason. The beautiful boy that had slowly taken your heart and ran with it and you couldn’t believe you were finally at a place with him where things were getting serious. You’d stuck to your guns and made him wait until you were ready but the fact he’d waited around and was willing to work for you made your heart thump and as you looked up into his kind eyes you knew you’d managed to find something special with him.

The six of you were laughing and sharing stories for ages. Woody teaching you more about Mason than you ever thought you’d know and you could tell Mason was hating every second of it but as you pouted at him sympathetically and kissed his jaw you knew he was fine if not a little embarrassed.

‘I’m just popping to the loo’ Mason told you, dropping a kiss on your cheek as he left and you used the time he was gone to walk over to the balcony. Taking a moment for yourself to think over the four days you’d had here and how now you and Mason were on the same page you couldn’t wait to see where things may take you.

The sun was almost setting and even though it was one of the most beautiful things you’d ever seen, you knew something was missing. Mason said he’d be right back but you were starting to think he’d got lost somewhere and as you looked around at Freddie and Lex, and Woody and Kaz enjoying the moment together you felt your heart sink that you couldn’t share this with your person.

That was until a hand on your waist made you jump but as you looked up to the culprit your favourite brown eyes were looking back at you sweetly and your heart settled on your chest now he was back.

‘Just me’ he whispered, his arm wrapping around further your waist so your back was to his chest but you knew you wanted more. Turning slightly in his hold to give him a quick kiss that he deepened instantly. A complete 180 to how he was acting with you a few hours before and you smiled at the realisation you were all fine again.

‘I didn’t think you’d make it’

‘I wouldn’t miss this for the world, baby’ he whispered. The pet name making you feel giddy as it was one he’d never used before and now it was your turn to blush at how he was making you feel. Eventually turning away from him before he leant his head on top of yours to watch the sunset and you felt your arms wrap over his to keep him in place. The feel of his lips pressing gentle kisses to the side of your face making you shiver and when he pulled you in impossibly closer you couldn't wipe the smile from your face. ‘Hey Y/n?’

‘Yeah?’ You whispered back. Trying to play things cool as you could tell his voice was nervous and you weren’t sure what he was about to say.

‘Would you be my girlfriend?’

‘I think I would, yeah’ you smiled, looking back up at him shyly but the look of relief on his face made your tummy flutter. ‘I didn’t get to poke you in the ribs’

‘There’s always time for that later’ he winked. His silly joke making you laugh but all you wanted in this moment was to kiss him. Not caring about how beautiful the sunset was as the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen was right in front of you and he was yours so you reached forward and pulled him in for a bruising kiss.

‘Do you mind if I stay with you tonight?’ you asked shyly once you’d both gotten your breath back. Resting your hands on his chest as he fully enveloped you and the bashful look on his face made your heart flutter.

‘I’d be offended if you didn’t’ he teased, swaying you from side to side gently before popping a kiss on your cheek. ‘You wanna swing by your room and grab some of your things?’

‘Somethings telling me I won’t need anything’ you told him. Hoping he’d catch onto what you were getting at and even though his eyebrows shot up in what looked like understanding you knew he needed a bit more from you.

‘Oh?’ He gulped. ‘Why’s that?’

‘Well are you suggesting I need something to sleep in?’ You asked him cheekily and the deep blush that sprung up on his nose made you carry on. ‘Cause in my head, I didn’t see me, or you for that matter, wearing anything’ you whispered. Trying to be as sexy and sultry as you could and you saw Masons eyes darken immediately.

‘You mean…?’

‘I think tonight might be your lucky night’ you whispered. Cupping his jaw to kiss him and the way he squeezed your waist excited you. Pulling away to see his black eyes frantically searching your face as you both became breathless and you knew he was ready to be alone with you.

‘Shall we get out of here?’

‘I think we should’ you giggled. Taking his hand and leaving the bar without a second glance to anyone you left behind.

The feel of Mason’s thumb gently caressing your ribs stirred you from your sleep slightly. The warmth of him engulfing you and when you eventually opened your eyes he was looking back at you softly.

'Sorry' he whispered, clearly it not being his intention to wake you up but you were thankful that he had so you got to look at him some more. Knowing you'd never get bored of the boy in front of you.

Simultaneously you both began to giggle. Thoughts of the night before flooding your mind of how you'd both finally got to explore the other like you'd been craving and it was like you could still feel his bruising grip on you hips as you rolled your body on top of his. Still felt his hand lightly gripping your throat as he slowly fucked you from behind with his body pressed against yours. His whimpers and whines ringing through your ears that had only aided in tipping you over the edge and for someone who could be so shy around you he was a dark horse when it came to pleasing you.

‘I can't believe you're finally mine' he whispered after your laughter had died down, your heart hammering in your ears at how sincere he sounded and you couldn’t help but roll on top of him. Kissing him sweetly as he steadied your body on top of his.

‘Believe it buddy. No backing out now’

‘I would never’ he whispered. ‘What are your plans for today, beautiful?’

‘Don’t really have any, just a pool day I guess but I feel like I’ve not seen much of actual Malta. I was hoping we would have been out a bit more’ you pouted and he smiled at you softly.

‘Would you like to? I mean we don’t have to stay here’

‘Yeah? I’d love to go to the beach’ you smiled. ‘You know, spend our first official day as a couple just the two of us’

‘Oh yeah’

‘Yeah, let’s fuck these lot off and go out. The towns not too far so we can have a look round at the shops and grab some lunch?’

‘Do you think the others would mind?’

‘I don’t really care if they do’ you laughed. ‘Let’s say we stayed here? We would have spent all day with just each other anyway we may as well just spend it away from here’

‘You’ve got a deal’

‘I’ll go get ready then’ you told him, but from the way his hands gripped your bum you knew he didn’t want to leave his bed any time soon.

‘Not yet’ he whispered and you could see exactly why he wanted to stay here from one look in his dark eyes. ‘Please gorgeous, I won’t be able to think straight all day otherwise’

‘Oh poor baby’ you teased ‘we don’t want that do we’

‘Nope, I was too excited last night. I didn’t even get to have you how I wanted’ he whispered whilst rolling the pair of you over and you giggled as he was suddenly on top of you. Kissing your face gently as he pressed himself into your core and you gasped at the feel of him again.

‘How did you want me?

‘Like this. I wanna look at you’ he told you lowly. Rolling his hips into you but soon enough his lips were on your neck and you felt yourself melting into the sheets.

Once Mason had got his own way you laid with him for a little while. Stealing kisses and stroking his cheek as he gazed at you lovingly but soon enough you were both hungry so he let you run back to your room so you didn’t waste too much of the day and within the hour you were meeting him at the entrance. Him deep in conversation with Woody but as soon as he saw you his whole face lit up before you said your goodbyes and made your way into the local town.

You walked around the little shops first. Grabbing yourself a quick bite to eat before picking out a few bits for your loved ones back home and your heart melted as you watched Mason try and pick a few things out for his nieces. He spoke about his family often and you could see how much he loved them all but you knew he cared for the little ones especially. Even getting your opinion before making his final decision and with a kiss to your forehead he went to pay.

Next you went to the beach, it was fairly quiet and you allowed yourself to lay in the water and clear your mind as the sun licked your skin. Feeling the waves ripple past you gently as you got comfy by the shore but soon enough your light was blocked and a pair of lips were kissing yours.

‘Sorry, I couldn’t resist’ he chuckled. Linking your pinkies together before joining you in the water and you realised then and there you’d never felt more at peace.

‘Is there anything you want to do today? We’ve still got a few hours before we need to go back’ you asked once you were both out and drying off. Mason insisting you sit in front of him and from the way he kept kissing your shoulder and touching your thighs you knew he was just as in his feels as you were.

‘I’m happy here with you’

‘That’s not what I asked’ you giggled. ‘You and Woody we’re talking earlier, did you have plans?’

‘I was meant to play tennis with Woody but then Kaz wanted to play too and it wouldn’t worked out with the three of us so I left them to it. She’s way better than me anyway’

‘Why don’t I join you?’ You offered. Knowing Mason loved any type of sports and he’d been banging on about playing tennis since before you’d come out here.

‘You play?’

‘Nope’ you winked. ‘But I picked up mini golf quickly, I’m sure you’ll be able to whip me into shape with tennis too’you laughed. Watching his eyes turn dark as he nibbled his lip but within a blink the look was gone, just a pinky blush over his cheeks and nose as he thought about that statement in a different context. ‘Why don’t we dry off, get some late lunch then head back and join them. Then I can get packed up early so I don’t have to worry about it later?’

‘You’re staying with me again tonight right?’ He asked, a slight tinge of fear in his voice that maybe you couldn’t but you just smiled at him.

‘If I must’ you joked, turning in his hold so you could kiss his jaw. ‘Of course I am’ you confirmed and with a final squeeze you got yourselves packed up.

Mason found you a little Italian restaurant just up from the beach and he let you order for the both of you before you made your way back to the hotel. Thankfully Woody and Kaz had only been playing for ten minutes by the time you turned up and you spent a little while getting to grips with the game as Mason tried to teach you. Flashbacks to your first date where he was teaching you to play golf crept into your mind but this time he was much more touchy and kept kissing your cheek which was making you giggle like a little girl.

Things only intensified when he took his shirt off and you got to see his muscles flexing under his skin and you knew he knew you were staring and he kept winking at you and kissing you deeply whilst guiding your arms from behind but all you could think about was getting him back to his room for a repeat of this morning.

y/n recently added to their stories

Dinner that night was a low key affair, in fact most of you were off doing your own things so you and Mason took yourselves out to another restaurant by the beach so you could fit in one final sunset and once you were both completely full, Mason suggested going back to the hotel for a few drinks before heading back to his room.

He held your hand the whole time, not even wanting to put it down to eat as you both caught up on the few days you’d been apart. Mason eager to hear all about your event and Mason updated you on his training whilst showing you pictures of him playing tag and walking around in his little crop top that you enjoyed a lot, but your favourite thing was the beautiful smile on his face.

The bar was fairly quiet when you got back and after you’d gotten your drinks and found a table you nipped off to the loo so you could make sure you still looked presentable. Not that you thought Mason would care but the thought of sitting opposite him with sauce all over your face filled you with dread. Thankfully you were fine but as you made your way back to your table you thought you could hear Mason's voice and he didn’t sound best pleased. It was only when you noticed Carl sitting opposite him did you realise why but you hung back a little to listen into the conversation and even though Carl was being his ever charming self you noticed how mason wasn’t backing down and finally telling him how it is.

‘All I’m saying is, I’d be careful with that one mate, she was all over me the other day when we were on that jet ski’

‘Oh was she yeah? See I seem to remember you being all over her, and she told me you wouldn’t leave her alone at the event so she’s not actually been around you since cause you made her uncomfortable? Pretty sure that’s what she told me’ Mason scowled and he watched Carl's face drop.

‘Got you on a tight leash already huh?’

You knew Manson would be able to handle things on his own but you didn’t want him to have to sit through this. Especially knowing everything you did now about Carl so without a second thought you made your way over to Mason before he could say anything else. Placing your hand on his shoulder before sitting yourself on his legs and smiling brightly at him. ‘You okay my love?’

‘Better now you’re here’ he grinned. Pulling you further into his lap and resting his hand on your thigh as you lent down to kiss him sweetly and from the look in his eye he knew that you’d overheard a lot of the conversation.

‘I don’t mean to be rude Carl but my boyfriend and I were hoping for a little bit of alone time’ you told him. Watching his lips purse at the words boyfriend but he recovered quickly and began to smirk at you in the cocky way he always did.

‘I can sit here, it’s a free country’ he shrugged, settling back into the seat like he owned the place but rather than get annoyed you just cupped Mason's jaw and made him look at you.

‘Shall we go back to the room then? We can start our evening early’ you winked at Mason, hoping it was obvious enough to them both as to what you were getting at and from Mason's red cheeks you could tell he’d understood. ‘Hope you and your right hand have a good night Carl’

You pulled Mason up by his hand, the pair of you giggling as you made your way into the corridor where your room was and when you came to his room he pulled your arm gently so you’d stop.

‘You’re insane, you know that?’

‘Maybe a little bit’ you shrugged, letting him push you up against his door as you both giggled and when you reached around to stroke the back of his hair you felt his shoulders relax like usual. ‘I just want you to know you’ll never have to worry about him with me, okay? I’m all yours, Mount. Have been from the second I saw you strutting your stuff about in front of that camera’

‘I’ve known it since you walked into that room too’ he whispered. Bumping his nose against yours before kissing your cheek. ‘Also remind me to never get on your bad side. That right hand comment was brutal’

‘The truth hurts sometimes, what can I say’ you smiled. ‘How’s about you take me in your room and you can have any side of me you like’

‘Deal’ he winked. Taking your hand in his before leading you inside for hopefully another night like the previous and as he pushed you up against the door from the inside and captured your lips with his, you knew this trip was the just the start of something beautiful with the most perfect man you’d ever met.

y/n

liked by masonmount, Freddie_Smith, woody_ and others

y/n if there was ever a place to make things official, then this was pretty perfect 🩷

view comments

masonmount mine 🙂‍↕️

y/n yours 🥰

Freddie_Smith you guys, I like to think I had a hand in this 🤍

y/n you should forget stuff for shoots more often

masonmount are you trying to get me replaced already?

y/n sleep with one eye open 🩷

Woody_ my boys gone and done it 🥺 happy for you guys

y/n thank you woody 🩷 can’t wait to see you and Kaz soon

Lexxy mum and dad 🥰

y/n that’s you and Freddie to me 😭

kazzzzza triple date soon please 🤭

y/n YES PLEASE 😘

Lexxy I’m so down let’s do it

declanrice I think I’ve missed a few chapters

benchilwell tell me about it

y/n hi boyssss 👋🏻 I can’t wait to meet you Masons told me loads about you

masonmount cod later? I think I’ve got some explaining to do 😭

509 notes · View notes

adragonprinceswhore · 5 months ago

Text

Rumours

Aemond Targaryen x (Ex)wife

Chapter I: The Chain 🎼 Masterlist

Summary: Three months after leaving him, your inevitable reunion with your soon-to-be ex-husband Aemond isn’t as bad as you thought it’d be.

Warnings: 18+, AFAB reader, she/her pronouns, angst, toxic relationship dynamic, possessive Aemond, depictions of anxiety, allusions to smut

Word count: 3000

A/N: Edited and done, please enjoy 🩵 Thank you my love @theoneeyedprince for giving this a look-through for me 🫶

Breathe.

In. Hold three seconds. Out. Hold three seconds. In. Hold three seconds. Out.

You haven’t been able to eat anything all morning, far too nauseous to keep even a piece of toast down.

The breathing exercise your therapist had taught you does little to help you calm down.

You’ve felt anxious before, but rarely this intense.

It’s so physical.

You feel it in your stomach turning, chest contracting, hands tingling, head spinning.

You knew you’d have to meet him sooner or later.

Afterall, you’d both decided to stay in the band. You’d just started to gain traction, embarking on your first ever tour across the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros.

A once in a lifetime opportunity for an up-and-coming band.

Still, knowing that didn’t make it easier to turn the handle of the door and walk into the studio.

Knowing he’ll be there.

You hadn’t seen your husband, Aemond, in over three months now.

Soon to be ex-husband.

You’d honestly expected the process to be speedier; you hadn’t demanded anything from him, the only thing important to you was that you kept all legal rights you had in relation to the band; the rights to your songs. And he hadn’t really given any conditions himself, yet his solicitors took ages contacting yours.

That’s all you’d heard from him over the summer. Updates from your legal advisers about his.

You’d blocked his number after leaving the divorce papers at your shared flat and moved out, tired of your phone overheating from the amount of times he’d tried calling you.

In the end, Alicent, your mother-in-law, had phoned you, begging you to please meet with her son and talk it out. You told her that you’d already talked plenty and there was no point in continuing indulging in pointless discussion. You’d always gotten along well with Alicent, so having her call you to do her son’s bidding felt so unbelievably awkward. He’d always been such a mama’s boy.

With one final, shaky exhale, you turn the handle of the door and push it open, stepping into the hallway.

With the door ajar, you can hear chatter from the studio.

Everyone’s already here.

Good, then you’d just have to suck it up and face them. Like ripping off a band-aid; only painful for a second.

You spot Helaena first. She gives you a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes, and straightens up slightly.

You’d met her a few times in the last months; brainstorming song ideas and recording vocals together in the studio.

Besides playing the piano, she wrote songs and sang for the band, just like you and Aemond. She hadn’t asked you anything about him, which you were thankful for. You know she’s anxious about how the dynamic in the band will shift now that the two of you have separated. And her anxiety materialises in the way she starts picking at her nail beds as soon as she sees you emerge through the door.

Next to Helaena sits Jace, who plays bass for the band. He gives you a half-hearted smile, accompanied by tense shoulders and a murmured greeting.

Across the table from him is Erryk, drummer and the newest addition to the band. He seems to not sense the tension that hangs heavy in the room and smiles at you until his eyes crinkle.

His obliviousness almost makes you laugh. It nearly manages to cut through the uncomfortable tension, until your eyes travel to lock with the last person in the room.

You knew that Aemond wouldn’t cause a scene and act infuriatingly indifferent towards you.

You knew that he’d give you a nod and get straight down to business.

Still, you feel a sliver of satisfaction when your predictions turn out to be true.

“So, everyone’s done with recording their parts?”, he asks the room.

He’s already pulled out his laptop, quick fingers typing as he waits for confirmation.

Though the tense atmosphere never really leaves the room, you all collectively try to power through as you discuss how recording went and what else needs to be fixed before the album is ready.

Due to your and Aemond’s separation, and the tumultuous events leading up to it, the band had agreed that everyone would record their vocals and instruments separately; putting everything together in production later. This had slowed down the process significantly, resulting in you being far from done with the album your label wanted you to release at the end of the month.

“As you know, the label isn’t too pleased with the fact that we haven’t finished the album yet-”, Aemond says, eyes still on the screen of his laptop; both his seeing eye and the unmoving one covered by a layer of white mist,

“-But they’ve asked us if we’d be willing to perform some new songs during the tour, to boost sales and get the hype up”

His voice is stoic, every utterance straight to the point. You sit on his blind side, with Helaena between your chair and his, and you take the opportunity of knowing he can’t clearly see you to examine him, searching for any changes since you last laid eyes on him, when his knuckles were bloody and panic reflected in his lilac eye.

He looks exactly like he always does; infuriatingly handsome.

His long, silvery hair hangs loose over his shoulders. His long eyelashes cast down as he inspects the screen of his laptop. His aquiline nose slopes beautifully to meet his perfectly pouty lips, begging to be kissed-

Fuck, stop!

Truth be told, you’d put extra effort into looking your best today, spending an hour on doing your makeup and picking out the perfect outfit. Hopefully you’d succeeded in making it appear much less intentional than it was, suddenly feeling a flash of embarrassment wash over you.

Why do you care what he thinks anymore?

The meeting goes on for another hour. The band’s manager, Tyland Lannister, joins in after 20 minutes, briefing the band members on the upcoming tour. Opening night’s in one week, on Dragonstone, and you’ll all fly out the morning of the show.

As the members of the band prepare to leave the studio, the tension that had previously felt so crushing is now only lingering in the periphery.

Jace and Erryk talk excitedly about all the places they’ll visit during the tour; what they wanted to eat and what they wanted to see. For a second it almost feels like things are back to normal, like the last three months never happened.

As everyone makes their separate ways home, you spot Aemond walk up to a black car and quickly jump in the passenger seat.

Your stomach turns.

You only see a flash of her black hair before the car drives away. The mask of indifference you’d put on cracks slightly at the sight of them together.

You wanted the divorce, idiot.

It still hurts seeing him move on though. He’d done it so quickly; uncharacteristically so.

The first week after you’d left, he blew up your phone trying to get a hold of you.

Despite his inexcusable behaviour, there had been times when you felt guilty for leaving him so abruptly. Even though you knew he deserved it, you also knew that leaving him and refusing to talk to him would drive him insane. What you hadn’t expected was that he’d go and get a new girl a mere week after Alicent had called you.

Seeing them together in real life made you feel exactly as you did when your friend Alysanne had sent you the link to the 30 second video two and a half months ago.

Nauseous.

The video showed Aemond getting out of a taxi in front of a new and chic Braavosi bistro downtown. It was opening night and a few local news sources were there to report. One of the journalists had recognised Aemond, clearly intrigued by the fact that the still-married bandman rounded the taxi and offered his hand to a beautiful dark-haired woman stepping out. As they walked towards the entrance, the reporter chased them down, microphone in hand and cameraman in tow.

“Aemond Targaryen? Already moving on after the separation I see?”, the reporter half-shouts behind Aemond to get his attention.

His date turns around in response to the comment, smiling as her emerald gaze observes the reporter. The news of your separation had been speculated on a few minor fansites after someone leaked an email from your solicitor's office, but neither you nor Aemond had made any statement about it.

He wasn’t planning on giving one now either, unimpressed eye giving the reporter a once-over before huffing in amusement and gesturing for his date to follow him inside.

The reporter, set on getting an answer from the rising star, chuckles before forcefully shoving the microphone in Aemond’s face,

“Women come and go, is that the case?”, he presses with a cheeky wink.

Aemond huffs out a laugh, “Yeah, something like that”, he says, wrapping his arm around his date’s shoulders as he leads her into the restaurant.

You’d later learn that the date from that night was his new manager, Alys Rivers.

Funny how he’d gotten a manager to handle his possible solo work.

Six months prior, when you’d been approached by a talent scout asking if you’d ever thought of doing solo stuff on the side, Aemond had been absolutely livid. After giving the agent a few well-chosen words, he had stormed off, leaving you upset and confused.

It was ultimately his jealousy and possessiveness that broke your marriage, getting to a point where you felt like you couldn’t be with him any longer. Neither as a lover nor a friend.

Now, the only place he can take in your life is as your bandmate; business partner, and nothing more.

You’d seriously considered leaving the band when you decided on leaving him. Still, somewhere deep inside you can’t shake this feeling that what your band has is something unique; something you won’t find anywhere else.

You and Aemond had started the band with Helaena right around the time you’d first met.

The three of you quickly bonded over your shared vision of what kind of music you’d like to make. On top of that, your voices sounded so good together, Aemond providing structure with his precision while you focused on conveying raw emotions.

So you decided to stick it out, work with your ex-husband in order to make the music that you wanted.

You’re an artist. All artists suffered for their art, right? You’d just have to suck this up and get on with it; continue to create art. And the pain would be worth it.

Besides, truth be told, you’d never met anyone quite as talented as Aemond. You’d never met anyone else who understood the music you wanted to create quite like he did.

When it came to music, you two almost had a telepathic connection. As someone who relies a lot on intuition and ‘that feeling in your gut’, you found it hard to describe music and your visions for it in general. But with Aemond you never needed to; he understood. Two minds wired the same.

Unfortunately, that wordless communication only stretched as far as music.

You think back to one of the last conversations you had before you left him.

You’d tried to confront him about his temper and inability to keep his jealousy in check, and he’d promptly ignored you; defaulting into shutting you out.

Exhausted, you resorted to the only solution you could come up with.

“Maybe we should spend some time apart, let things cool down a bit”, you try, purposefully making your voice as gentle as possible.

Aemond, who’d been staring out the window of your apartment in contemplative rage, quickly turns to face you, expression impassive but one eye furious.

“If you want some ‘time apart’ you might as well get on with it and leave”, he says, voice chilly. Sometimes when he’s angry, he sounds so hateful it hurts your heart.

“What do you want me to do Aemond?”, you reply, patience running thin as anger overcomes you, “You don’t allow me to live my life, you hinder any chance of growth I have-”,

“Growth!? What else do you need?”, he spits back. “Do you understand what it means to be married to someone? I do fucking everything for you, you’re my wife!”

“Sure, chain me to our marriage. Keep me shackled to you forever, that’s what you want, isn’t it? While you fuck around town, relishing in the freedom you never allow me”

Your agitated voice matches his. You know your words will hurt him.

Aemond exhales loudly. His jaw’s shut tight and misty gaze piercing. He has a tendency to shut down during fights, especially when he doesn't have a snide remark waiting at the back of his mind.

Aemond’s eyes, locking yours in a death stare, narrow,

“So you want out?”

The flight to Dragonstone goes by in a flash, and after a quick soundcheck at the venue, the five members of Dragon Dreamers start getting ready for the show.

You and Helaena do your usual routine of getting ready together, checking each other’s makeup and hair.

As the venue starts to fill up, the band gathers backstage, quickly running through your set one last time. You try to shoot a covert glance at Aemond, but he immediately finds your eyes. As always, he looks impeccable.

“Since we’ve finished ‘The Chain’ in production, I suggest we play that as our opening number tonight. It’s fast-paced and will get the crowd moving”, Aemond states, looking at his bandmates for approval.

They all nod knowingly, catching you by surprise.

“I’m not sure I’m familiar with ‘The Chain’”, you say, trying to sound neutral though you suspect he chose a song you don’t know on purpose.

“It’s the one you did some backup vocals on in the studio”, Aemond replies, throwing you a quick look, “Me and Helaena can sing the verses and you can join in during the chorus”, he offers, moving to pick up his guitar, signalling that he’s done with the conversation.

Great, first song on opening night and you’ll stand there like a deer in headlights.

You sigh quietly and grab your tambourine. If you’re not going to sing you’ll at least try to join in by jamming a bit to the beat. Only one thing echoes in your mind,

Don’t let him get to you!

‘The Chain’ starts playing. Steady drums beat in a slow rhythm as Aemond plays a bluesy melody on his guitar, and you realise that it is one of the songs that you and he had worked on when you were still together.

Last time you heard it, you had worked out the melody, but not really pinned down the lyrics. Aemond must’ve taken it upon himself to finish it, completely steering away from the direction you thought the song would take.

‘Listen to the wind blow, watch the sun rise’

Why haven't you heard anything about this new edit?

A chill runs down your spine.

Has he re-written it to be about you?

‘Run in the shadows, damn your love, damn your lies’

Yes he has.

You and Aemond got married at sunrise by the Hightower summer house in Highgarden in June two years ago.

Aemond had proposed to you only five weeks prior, and being so in love that you couldn’t possibly imagine being separated for more than 15 minutes, you decided to tie the knot as quickly as possible.

You just wanted to be his.

That had been one of your fondest memories together; a small ceremony that was only yours.

Now, it leaves a sour taste in your mouth.

Memories rotting from within.

You hate it. You don’t want to think about that now.

Damn him. Damn his love. Damn his lies.

‘And if you don’t love me now, you will never love me again’

‘I can still hear you saying, “you would never break the chain”’

As he sings, he sounds so angry, his voice is almost foreign to you.

He usually tries to keep his emotions in check, even when performing. Probably too scared to be vulnerable enough to let people know he actually has feelings, you reckon.

You remember the song and the rapid pace it picks up. Trying to ignore what you think is Aemond staring at you from the side of the stage, you dance and sing to the song about your heartbreak.

You let the music consume you as you work the tambourine, dancing and spinning, trying to relish in the feeling of knowing your band had made a killer song.

The audience is loving it. You have never heard them this rowdy before, and you can see the entire venue dancing.

You keep going, trying to distract yourself so your gaze won’t travel to Aemond.

He had played a rough first version of the guitar solo he wanted to incorporate in the song for you when you were still together. It really was phenomenal, fitting perfectly with the climax of the song.

He’s an insanely skilled guitarist, never missing a note and always instinctively knowing exactly what melody will match the feel of a song.

The audience is loving it, screaming and dancing with you.

Feeling braver and with the adrenaline from the performance running through your veins, you come up to your mic and sing along with Aemond and Helaena, chanting in unison.

The three of you sound good, like you always do.

The realisation gives you comfort; there’s still hope for your band.

‘Chain, keep us together’

‘Running in the shadows’

You can do this.

A/N: Thank you for reading! 🫶

#aemond targaryen x you #aemond targaryen imagines #aemond targaryen fanfiction #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen smut #aemond targaryen #aemond fanfiction #aemond x you #my fics #rumours #Spotify

488 notes · View notes

fadeintoyou1993 · 2 months ago

Text

i'm literally so fucking sorry 2 keep doing these & i hope the day when i do not have to comes soon 🥹 but in the meantime... as y'all are tired of hearing, i'm an audhd trans dyke w no fixed income bc getting accessible jobs where i live is impossible, so most of the money i make is thru commissions online & freelance design gigs. i have some huge & important medical appointments coming up that could lead up to a more accessible & peaceful life but they're just. impossible for me to pay out of pocket bc i just simply do not have that money, not w my bills & medication & helping my dad with the nursing home bills for my grandma on top of all of it.

w that said, i'm taking commissions. i have three premium themes that you can buy right now (one of which i posted today - and am using on my main blog if you wanna check it out). i also have a masterlist of free themes that support tumblr's new editor format here. check out my resource blog for anything that could be of use to you: @userbru

and if not but you would still like to help me out in any way, any any anyyyy amount is extremely appreciated. thank you so much in advance. please don't tag these as s1gn4l b00st (it tends to get the post to lose traction)

thank you! 🌻🧿🕯️

pp.me / k0-f1

$126/600

#txt #mutual aid #financial aid #tumblr commissions #here i go again 🥹🥹

302 notes · View notes

chilling-seavey · 4 months ago

Text

Dreamland (ln4) - Part Eight

↳ A/N Thank you all for so much love on this little silly story that I just jotted out in my free time! I really took a chance with posting this and the traction it's received has been incredible to see. We still have the epilogue ahead of us, but here is the final part of Dreamland <3 looking forward to hearing your thoughts!!

↳ Inspired By: 'Can We Pretend That We're Good' by Daniel Seavey

↳ Summary: Your secret relationship with Lando goes against everything your management demands and with the start of the new year - the year that is supposed to bring you both joy - everything feels as though it is crumbling around you all at once

↳ Pairings: Fanboy Lando Norris x Famous!Author!Fem!Reader (NO use of y/n), University Student Lando x Internet Friend George x Internet Friend Alex

↳ Word Count: 17.9k

↳ Warnings: 18+, NSFW, oral sex (m and f receiving), spanking, dirty talk, leaning into Lando's breeding kink fr, unprotected pregnant sex.

PART SEVEN || EPILOUGE

Lando stood in the archway to the living room, the carefully wrapped gift box clutched in his hands. Dinner had just been finished moments before and the dishes were put away and his family sat together in the light of the Christmas tree and side table lamps as they welcomed the last evening of the year together. Winter break had started two weeks earlier and since Lando had arrived home from university, he had been in a constant state of silent anxiety as he kept an important life-altering piece of information from his parents and his siblings that the passage of time did no favours in concealing. The longer he waited, the worse their reactions would be, he was sure.

You had told him often - almost daily - that he had to tell them soon that you were pregnant but every time he tried to, the moment didn’t feel right. For most of his young-adult life, his parents had constantly underestimated him and brushed him off and called his aspirations nothing more than empty dreams. Now, that he finally had his biggest dream come true - you - he was half terrified that his family was going to ruin it. He couldn’t stomach the idea of someone making him feel badly for finally getting what he had always prayed for.

It was now New Years Eve and he knew he couldn’t go into the new year with such a weighty secret.

“Lando!” his brother called, “Come on! We’re starting charades and we need you to even out the teams.”

His brother and sisters and parents looked his way expectantly and Lando hesitated in the doorway, glancing down at the long gift box he held in his hands. He had spent hours and days pining over what to get his parents to break the news to them and with some spending money that he had put away from the funds he earned while working for you in Monaco that summer, he finally found something he thought was perfect. He still felt sick with nerves.

“What do you have there, son?” his father asked.

Lando shrugged shyly and then pushed himself away from the wall with a soft, “Just…a little something for you and Mum.”

His youngest sister groaned, “Way to make the rest of us look bad with the extra gift.”

“It’s nothing like that.” Lando promised, “Not Christmas related.”

His mother smiled and held out her hands for the gift from her spot on the couch, “You’re a sweetheart, my boy.”

Lando held onto the box for a second longer as if knowing that once it was in her hands, there was no going back. His father shuffled closer to his wife to join her in opening their gift and Lando stood anxiously in front of them with his hands clasped in front of him. The rest of the Norris siblings peered around him to watch nosely as the parents untied the gold ribbon and took off the lid of the narrow box.

The bottle of red wine was lifted from the tissue paper inside and his mother smiled, “Aw, Lando, that’s nice of you, honey.”

“Read the label.” he whispered with a dry mouth.

The room was quiet and he stared at his parents’ faces as they both read the floral patterned label that was applied to the side of the bottle. Their content expressions fell into confusion and shock.

“What does it say?” his middle sister pressed.

“Oh, fuck, mate, what did you do?” his brother groaned.

Their father read the label out loud, “‘Pairs well with becoming grandparents. Baby Norris coming this Spring.’”

Silence.

Lando swore the level his anxiety was at had made him go deaf because he had never heard his house that quiet in his entire life. He swallowed thickly. It sounded like it echoed across the living room.

The way his parents were looking at him, Lando couldn’t tell what they were feeling. With flat expressions, his father’s eyebrows furrowed and his mother’s face having gone a little pale, they just didn’t say anything. Lando would have rathered yelling.

His brother’s sudden snort of laughter broke the silence followed by his two younger sisters snickering from behind him. Lando didn’t move, narrowed in on only his parents despite the comedic nature of his siblings.

“Didn’t know this was April fools.” his brother said, making the other two laugh again.

“It’s not a joke.” Lando said softly.

His mother blinked at him, “Huh?”

His father let out a nervous little chuckle, “Really? You can’t be serious.”

“Why would I joke about this?” Lando asked.

“Who’s pregnant?” his mother inquired.

His brother teased to the other siblings, “Lando is.”

They burst into giggles of laughter again.

Ignoring the obvious immaturity and facetious remarks of his siblings, Lando gestured to the box, “There’s something else in there.”

His mother reached in and pulled out the small piece of paper that housed the most recent ultrasound that you had sent him a copy of. The black and white image clearly showed a growing baby to the point where you could easily make out a head, arms, legs like it was almost a photograph. Your name was printed in the top left corner.

His parents’ eyes shifted from your name to Lando’s face as he stood in front of them and desperately tried not to throw up. The paper was turned around to the outstretched hand of his sister and the siblings leaned in to look.

“That’s photoshop.” his brother announced.

Lando snapped, “It’s not.”

“Lando…” his father started.

“She’s pregnant.” Lando spoke the words out loud for the first time ever. “And it’s mine. And after I graduate, I’m moving to Monaco to be with her and the baby.”

“Lando…” his mother tried.

“Lando’s in dreamland again.” his middle sister sang.

“Stop.” Lando glared at his giggling siblings. “This isn’t funny. Stop thinking that I’m some stupid kid who can’t make a life for himself how he wants.”

“This is what you want?” his father pressed. “You want to be a father at twenty-two?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, Lando, you can’t be serious.” his father laughed humorlessly, “You’re still a child yourself! You’re seriously telling us that you got this girl pregnant? The girl that you might as well have a shrine for in your room? The one you’ve been stuck in clouds about for months?”

“We were seeing each other in Monaco when I was there working for her company.” Lando explained, “I couldn’t tell you because no one was supposed to know but…”

“So she, as your professional superior, took advantage of you as her intern?”

“No.” Lando cut in quickly, “It was nothing like that.”

“Sure sounds like it to me.”

“We…” Lando ran his hand through his hair as his flushed cheeks expressed his stress and his slight embarrassment as he admitted, “We were sleeping together even before I worked for her.”

His youngest sister snorted from where she was leaning forward against the couch beside him, “Not possible. She was on tour. You told us.”

Lando glared at her, “When I saw her on tour, you idiot.”

She put her hands up in defence.

His mother tried to reason with him, “We haven’t even met or spoken to this girl.”

“So?” Lando snapped, his heart racing, “Just because you haven’t met her suddenly means I’m lying? She’s a New York Times Bestselling Author; she’s busy. She’s pregnant and busy and I would have liked if my family actually offered me some sort of support for once rather than looking at me like I’m a fucking loser! Why do you hate me to be happy?”

“We’re just saying…consider your options.” his father said as gently as he could. “You’re still young.”

Lando was right there with his stern response, “She’s twenty weeks along. Our options have long been considered. We’re having this baby and if you don’t want to be a supportive part of it, then I’m gone.”

“Lando-” his father called after him as he stepped over his wide-eyed siblings and stormed out of the room without a look back.

Fighting tears, Lando heaved himself up the stairs and right to his room, slamming the door behind him just in time for the sob to overtake him. He pressed his hand to his mouth to try and keep himself quiet, his whole body trembling with adrenaline and frustration as he sat himself down on the side of his bed and did the only thing he knew to do when the troubles of his family got to him.

landonorris: They took it badly georgerussell63: What?! How?! alex_albon: Oh fuck alex_albon: What did they say? landonorris: They literally didn’t believe me landonorris: My siblings laughed in my fucking face and after convincing them that I didn’t make this up my parents basically accused her of abuse of power over me and pushed ‘other options’ at me like I would EVER think of getting rid of the baby I prayed so long for landonorris: It was supposed to be a happy moment and it was miserable and now I’m just crying in my room landonorris: I want this semester to be done and I want to start my life with her alex_albon: Damn mate :/ I’m sorry alex_albon: That really sucks georgerussell63: Wow I mean I’ve heard of parents being upset from news like this but straight up not believing you is new alex_albon: Honestly georgerussell63: I don’t even know what to say mate alex_albon: You know that we’re happy for you more than anyone else and we’ll always be here for you georgerussell63: Btw have you decided on godparents yet alex_albon: George omfg alex_albon: Not the time alex_albon: (but it’s definitely me) landonorris: I can’t even think about that right now I can hardly breathe alex_albon: Hey hey hey alex_albon: It’s okay, take some deep breaths georgerussell63: She loves you and that’s all that really matters here, right? landonorris: Yeah landonorris: I can’t wait to get to her alex_albon: She’s all yours landonorris: Still hard to believe sometimes georgerussell63: I know!! To me too georgerussell63: You’ve only been talking about her for months and years and decades alex_albon: Manifesting works 🫡 landonorris: Can we change the subject? I think I need to distract my brain georgerussell63: Sure mate what did we want to talk about landonorris: Alex how’s it going with Lily? alex_albon is typing…

The knock at Lando’s bedroom door interrupted his conversation and he looked up as his mother cracked open the door and peeked in. He sighed at the sight of her, knowing that another exhausting conversation was about to ensue.

“Can I come in?” she asked.

He shrugged but didn’t decline.

She came inside and gently closed the door behind her, carrying two stemless wine glasses filled with a little taste of red wine each, and she sat down beside her youngest son, offering one out to him. Lando locked his phone and set it to the side so he could take the glass without so much as a thanks.

“Thought we should give that wine a try.” she said, “And it seemed like you might need some.”

Lando barely cracked a smile and raised the glass up to take a sip of the rich bitter drink.

“We’re not upset with you, if that��s what you’re thinking.” she explained cautiously, “We were just…very, very surprised.”

“I’m not lying.” Lando stated flatly.

“I know. I didn’t say you were. You have given me no reason to believe you would be lying about this.”

Lando swirled the wine around the bottom of his glass haphazardly, not wanting to look at her.

His mother continued, “Do you want to tell me about how this all came to be? You and this girl and how come I knew nothing about it? You always used to tell me everything.”

“I felt stupid when I told you guys anything about her.” Lando admitted quietly. “She was always just so unattainable in all of your eyes and you constantly made me feel like I wasn’t ever going to be worthy of her. Even when I tried to tell you about the job, you guys just laughed at me. It’s like I’m never good enough for you and especially not when I’m making my own path and finding someone who is literally the girl of my dreams.”

“It was never my intention to make you feel like you couldn’t talk to me. I know your siblings are hard on you sometimes…you’ve always been so sensitive despite your tough shell and thus an easy target for them…but you should always feel welcome to tell me anything. I’m your mother. I love you no matter what.”

Lando sniffled and finally looked over at her, “I hated keeping all this from you, Mum.”

His mother smiled sadly and wrapped her arm around his back to pull him close. With a kiss to the top of his head, she asked, “Can you tell me about her? You met on her tour, right?”

A little smile grazed Lando’s face at the simple offer of being able to talk about you, “Yeah. I waited in line for almost hours and when she signed my book…I just had to offer some Bristol restaurants and one thing led to another in this conversation and she ended up taking me up on my offer to show her a good place. We went to Giovanni’s.”

“Always your favourite.” his mother gave him a squeeze.

“And it was all I could hope for. She’s so amazing. She’s just a person, Mum. I always knew that but everyone else doesn’t…they always hold her to such high standings and pressures and I think I was the first person to really see her for her.” Lando tapped his finger against the rim of the glass nervously, “And…we slept together that night.”

“I see.” his mother’s slightly amused tone had Lando biting back his blushing smile at his confession. It wasn’t horribly drastic to admit since they must have known from his pregnancy announcement but telling his mother when he lost his virginity was nevertheless slightly embarrassing.

“And we’ve talked almost every day since.”

“So when you came home for summer break…”

Lando nodded as he sat up straight again, “Yeah. We were talking.”

“And that’s how you got the internship.”

“Yeah.” Lando took a sip of his drink again before continuing, “Although the internship was more of a coverup for an excuse to spend the summer together. I did work and I did get paid for the work but no one other than her closest friends and mine could know. Her entire team had no clue about us.”

“Not even your mother.”

Lando assured her easily, “Or hers. But not that you guys here would have ever believed me. Dad was ready to file a lawsuit the second I told you that it happened in the summer.”

His mother set her hand on his arm, “You let me handle your father. You know how set in his ways he can be. He just sees your potential and wants you to make the most of it.”

“I don’t want to be an accountant, Mum.” Lando admitted strongly, “I’m going to finish my degree and make the most of all the money that you and Dad were kind enough to give me for school, but I don’t see myself there. Not at all.”

His mother just listened as he let his bottled up thoughts tumble out.

“The only thing I strived for these last four years was to get to her and that sounds so ridiculous, I know, but it’s true. I worked so hard to be able to get to where I am now and no money or time or anything could have gotten me there as diligently as my own determination and I did it and I love her so much, Mum. She’s my whole heart and thensome and all I’ve wanted in life. I have prayed and prayed for her for months and almost years and she’s even better than I had ever dreamed. And to have a baby with her?”

Lando was beaming despite the tears that shimmered in his eyes and he looked everywhere but at his mother from the overwhelming emotions that pulled at his chest.

“God,” Lando chuckled wetly, “I still can’t believe it. I keep pinching myself just waiting to wake up because all of this is too good to be true. Everything that I have prayed for and worked so hard for is mine. She is mine and we are having a baby. I’m gonna have a baby, Mum; a baby as perfect and beautiful as she is.”

“Oh, my Lando.” his mother smiled through her own brimming tears and pulled him in for a hug. Right away, he was melting into her arms and let out a relieved sob that came with the weight of his words and feelings that had been lifted from his shoulders. She held him close and rubbed his back and spoke to him softly, “You are in love, my boy. I see it in your eyes and hear it in your voice and it is all around you.”

Lando could only choke out a little, “Yeah.”

“If this baby came from a place of love, then no one can take that away from you.” she whispered. “I just wish you told us sooner so we could help you. She’s twenty weeks, you said?”

Lando nodded as he sat back from their hug and she wiped his cheeks free of tears with her thumb.

“My silly boy.” she tisked, “You don’t have to do this all on your own.”

“She’s all on her own, Mom.” Lando admitted, his voice trembling, “Her whole family is in a different country. She’s in that city on her own with the pressure of the paparazzi and her management and PR already gave her a really nasty warning that she is to not be seen with me because it’s bad for her image because the public is going to think like Dad thought about her using me and…”

“Okay,” his mother set her wine glass down on his bedside table so she could have two hands to hold his face in her warm palms, “I’m going to help you figure things out. Let me talk to your father and-”

“No. He’s just going to judge me like he always does.”

“Your father loves you.” she told him. “Immensely. Maybe he holds you on a pedestal as high as the world holds this girl of yours and maybe that’s wrong of him. I will talk to him. Don’t worry.”

Lando nodded.

The sudden ringing of his phone pulled them out of their moment and Lando immediately turned to grab his phone from beside him on the bed and saw that you were FaceTiming him. He didn’t have to say anything as his mother saw your name on his screen - punctuated with an orange heart emoji - and she ran her fingers through his hair and pulled him in to kiss his cheek.

“Love you.” she whispered before getting up to give him his privacy.

“Love you.” Lando replied with a sniffle and wiped his eyes so as to not be caught crying by you when he answered the call.

His mother paused in the doorway for a moment and before leaving, she said, “Tell her I say hello.”

Lando grinned and nodded.

The door closed behind her and he answered your call to catch it before the ringing stopped and he shuffled back on his bed a little more comfortably as your call connected. Soon, your face appeared on his screen and he smiled widely.

“Hey, you.” you said, your voice a little choppy as your connection worked to stabilize itself.

“Hey.” Lando replied gently. He took a second to stare at you on the screen of his phone with you in your hoodie and messy clipped back hair.

“You took a while to answer. Did I interrupt something?”

“No, not really.” Lando shrugged, “Was just talking to my mom. She says hi.”

Seeing your face break into a grin at that statement had Lando smiling right back at you.

“Oh. Tell her I say hello back.” you answered, “Does this mean you told them?”

Lando nodded, “Yeah. I did.”

“Oh gosh.” you shifted on your bed to literally sit forward with nervousness, “How did they take it?”

“Honestly? Really bad at first.” Lando sighed, “I was ready to pack up and leave. They thought I was lying.”

Your eyes widened, “Lying? Why?”

“Because it’s you. And they know you as this unattainable girl I have been pining after for months.”

You smiled fondly at him, “Aww.”

“But Mum came upstairs after and talked it out with me and I told her everything and she’s more than willing to be there for us every step of the way. It feels like such a relief.”

“Oh, I’m so glad.” you sighed, “I want to meet your family soon.”

“At least my mom.” Lando said, “The rest might take a little while to simmer down after today before I will let them anywhere near you.”

“Protective Lan.” you teased.

“Always protective over you.”

You giggled sweetly and leaned back comfortably on your bed.

“How’s baby?” he asked.

“Wanna see?”

“Yes, please!”

You shifted on your bed and lifted up the hem of your hoodie to show off your growing stomach, angling your phone down so he could see. Lando habitually moved his phone closer to his face as if needing a better look and he grinned ear to ear at the sight of that visible curve over your belly. You pushed the waistband of your pyjama shorts down a little farther so the full sight of your abdomen was on display for the camera and your hand rubbed over it in happy circles.

“Here’s baby!”

Lando absolutely swooned, “Our little sweet potato!”

“Yeah!” you smiled and turned the phone back to your face, “Baby’s been really wiggling around in there this week. It feels so weird.”

“Maybe he or she is enjoying all those Christmas treats.”

“Maybe…I can’t get enough of those cream cheese cookies my family makes. They’re like crack. Maybe I gave baby a sugar rush.”

You shared little laughter through your respective phones.

“But we’re okay.” you said, finally answering his question, “We miss you.”

“I miss you too. I can’t believe I haven’t seen you in person since early October.”

“I know.” you sighed, “It’s not fair.”

“That’s okay.” he said, “Only means our reunion will be even better.”

“I can’t wait to kiss you.” you admitted shyly.

Lando broke into a grin, “Me too. The second I see you, I’ll be kissing you like my life depends on it.”

“Maybe it does.” you giggled.

“Feels like it. I’m, like, going through withdrawal.”

“Aw, me too.” you smiled, “Lando withdrawal. Worse than any drug, I’m sure.”

“Not that we’d know.”

“No. But we can assume.”

“Educated deductions.”

“Of course. We are very educated after all. My man is going to come home with a whole degree.”

Lando nodded, “Working hard for you and our little sweet potato.”

You tilted your phone back down your body to show your hand on top of your modest bump, “And we are very proud of you.”

“I love you so much, I can’t get over it. Feels like my heart is going to explode.” Lando breathed.

“Oh!” you shot up in your bed, “Wait, I have to show you what I got from my aunt for Christmas!”

Lando laughed lightly, “Can you tell me you love me too?”

You stopped suddenly and looked right at your phone, staring at him through the camera like he was ridiculous to ask, “I love you too. Always.”

Lando smiled, “Okay, show me what you got.”

He watched happily as you gave him a little tour of your few things you received in the prior few days of celebrations and you told stories about being back home for the holidays. You told him you couldn’t wait to show him where you grew up and the places that inspired your books and your goals…and to introduce him to your family cat who came into the camera at one point and flicked her tail in your face. Life felt so good with you, even if he couldn’t physically be with you. That time would come soon enough.

There was nothing you would rather have been doing to ring in the new year than FaceTiming him. As a little virtual party for two (three, if you counted your unborn baby), you counted down the final few seconds together until the clock rang at the hour. Lando stared fondly at your sleepy smile as you laid on your side on your bed back home, and you wished each other a happy new year.

“New year, new us.” Lando proclaimed.

You smiled softly at him through the phone.

There was a pause as you just stared at each other and Lando tried not to let the melancholy look on your face completely break his heart. He rolled over onto his stomach, still holding his phone in two hands, trying not to let his own heartache show.

“Don’t be sad, sweetheart. We’re having a baby this year.”

A small smile pricked at the corner of your mouth and you let out a soft, “I know.”

“And now both our families know…and I’m going to be with you soon.”

You sniffled and rolled onto your side on your bed, replying softly, “Yeah.”

“I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” you sighed to the ceiling, “I just wish this year could be easier. I just know it’s going to get harder.”

“Management?”

“Yeah.”

“Fuck them.”

You chuckled faintly, just trying to humour him.

“Don’t let those dickheads ruin our year and the excitement of having our baby.”

“I’m trying.” you mumbled. “I don’t want to tell them I’m pregnant but at the same time I feel like I need to tell them. They might be able to guide me on how to go about this in public but they might also…be mean about it.”

“No one is mean to you on my watch.”

Lando’s defence was cute but you knew he was more the passive type, comforting you after the fact rather than sticking up for you. That was fine. He wasn’t used to the industry anyway and the worst thing would be him accidentally making things worse. His comfort was more than you could ask for anyway. It was more than you were used to.

“Y’know,” you said, discreetly desperate to change the subject, “you’re my greatest blessing to come out of the last year.”

Lando grinned ear to ear, “Right back at you, my dream come true.”

“I can’t wait until you can come home.”

“Soon, sweetheart. Just keep kicking Monaco’s ass until then. I’ll be back with you before you know it.”

As far as Lando knew, you were living life no differently: still that impressive best-selling author with a glass framed office and a bathtub full of money; your kick-ass personality virtually untouchable. In reality, you were at an all time low. Ever since October when that picture of you and Lando together was posted online by some stranger, management had forbidden you from seeing each other and between that and your balancing act of pregnancy hormones that you were trying your damnedest to suppress, you felt miserable.

Walking around on eggshells every time a member of your management or PR team came into the office was growing increasingly difficult as the weeks went by and your baby grew larger and larger inside you. It was getting harder to hide and you were terrified of what their reaction would be if they ever found out. So you ended up working from home all to avoid it. All you really had to do was write and the few meetings you had to join you could do so virtually, so you faked an illness and kept yourself cooped up in your million dollar Monaco apartment all by yourself. Well, you and your unborn baby who kept you company with those fluttering little wiggles inside you.

What started as a few days of working at home turned into a nearly permanent relocation after winter break. The moment you landed after Christmas and New Years, you hightailed it right to your house and didn’t leave for days in fear of someone finding out your secret. The iron fist of your management would be worse than the public’s ridicule, you were sure. There was nothing to do but avoid, avoid, avoid.

Your friends were starting to grow worried. You still texted them and video chatted with them, but you were different and they could sense it. It was as if your anxiety could be felt through the screen. They knew you better than anyone - and even better than Lando, although no one would admit that to him - so by the time two weeks had passed since you had returned to Monte Carlo and you hadn’t stepped foot out of your house even to visit them, your friends were ready to stage an intervention.

The knock on your front door pulled you out of your trance as you sat on your living room couch with your feet up on the coffee table. You were in sweat pants and a hoodie with the hem of the sweater pushed up to your chest so your modest round belly was on display and you were rubbing it like it was a magic-8 ball with the powers to cure your writer's block. The front door felt ages away so you didn’t even bother to look over at it when you heard the knock, too comfortable in your cozy cocoon on your couch, your body’s imprint nearly dented into the cushions from the days you had spent there.

Your laptop’s text cursor blinked mockingly at you from your screen and you stared back at it, melancholy. There was another knock on your door and then the doorbell rang right after and you frowned as you glanced over at your foyer but didn’t make a move to get up. You were twenty-two weeks pregnant after all; getting up from the couch felt like climbing a mountain. The sound of the doorbell had made your growing baby wiggle around inside you and you rubbed your warm hands over your belly to calm them.

When you thought you were in the clear from the mysterious caller at your door, the bell rang again, multiple times, in quick succession. You groaned and heaved yourself up from the couch, just wanting the noise to stop.

“Fuck, I’m coming…I’m coming.” you grumbled, pulling your hoodie back down to hide your baby from your unwelcome visitor.

When you opened the large front door, your four best friends stood bunched together on your front step: Oscar, Lily, Charles, and Max. They all grinned at the sight of you and you just scowled.

“What?” you sighed.

Charles pushed past you to welcome himself into your house and the other three followed as he announced, “We missed you and you were being strange in your messages so we came to cheer you up.”

“I’m fine, Charlie.” you closed the door behind them and crossed your arms tightly.

Oscar eyed the empty takeout containers that littered your kitchen island, “Clearly you’re not.”

“I’m growing a whole human…it’s tiring. I’m tired.” you shrugged.

“Is that why you’re not coming into work?” Oscar asked, “Because it’s hard to be an assistant to someone who isn’t there.”

“Yeah.” you answered flatly, sitting yourself down at one of the stools at the island with a habitual hand magnetizing to your belly. “I just don’t want to be out there right now…around people. Now that I’m showing...”

“Well it makes sense you feel like that but you can’t let your fear control you.” Lily countered, “You’re sitting here alone for days on end eating junk food…when was the last time you saw sunlight?”

“When I opened the door to you four.” you answered under your breath.

“If you’re feeling like this, why don’t you stay with Max and me?” Charles offered. “We have the guest room…you’re always welcome. Then you don’t have to be all alone.”

“I can’t.”

“Sure, you can. It’s no trouble.”

“I don’t wanna leave my house.” you pouted, pulling your sleeves over your hands as you stared at your lap, “It reminds me of Lando here.”

“Lando’s not gone.” Oscar reminded you, “He’s going to be back with you soon.”

You retorted quietly, “And when he is, management is going to know that we haven’t cut ties.”

Max sighed and stepped forward, having observed your interactions since you had opened the door, and he set one hand on the island countertop beside you. He nudged your chin with his other hand and you reluctantly looked up at him with a frown.

“You’re going to have to rip off the bandaid at some point.” he said, always the realist when it came to your work. It was how you connected most through being in similar public careers and you treasured his wisdom and advice like a big brother. “You’re going to have to sit down with your team and tell them how it’s going to be.”

“I have a contract.” you protested weakly.

“Re-work it to fit everyone's needs. Talk to Pierre. Get him on your side so you can team up.”

Lily spoke up, “Pierre knows just as much as management knows.”

Max added, “And he wants out of this ridiculous deal as much as you do.”

“He won’t risk his career for me.” you explained, “If this PR relationship is what keeps him afloat then he’s not going to risk it.”

“You won’t know that for sure unless you ask.”

You groaned and slumped down into your arms on top of the island, “I can’t do this. My body aches and I’m tired and I miss my boyfriend and I hate my life.”

Charles grabbed your arm, “And you’ve been staring at the same white walls for two weeks and that does not help. We’re taking you out…to get a proper meal and to get some mental stimulation.”

“I can’t go out there.” you frowned.

“Yes, you can.” Lily gestured to your hoodie, “No one can tell.”

“Under this?” you pinched the fabric, “When do I ever go out in hoodies?”

“You look nice.” Oscar offered.

You sent him a disbelieving glare to which he just shrugged.

“Then just put on jeans,” Charles offered a compromise, “and let’s go.”

Your friends had a way of convincing you to do things that no one else was able to and you lugged yourself down the hallway to your room to change into the new pair of maternity jeans that came in the mail the other day. Charles and Oscar were cleaning up your kitchen when you returned from your room but no audible thanks had to be shared, your little sheepish smile said enough. They were too good to you.

In the driveway was Max’s black Genesis SUV and he unlocked it with a chirp of the key and he opened the passenger door for you. You hesitated and glanced at Charles who just shrugged as he climbed into the backseat with your other two friends.

“You get priority because you are with child.” he said.

“Wow, you are all treating me like royalty.” you gushed and climbed into the expensive leather seat. “I should be depressed more often.”

“Ha ha.” the three chorused sarcastically from the backseat.

When Max got behind the wheel, he slid on his designer sunglasses and turned the key in the ignition, “All set?”

With a trio of “yes!” from the back, you joined in with a, “I don’t know where we’re going, but sure!”

It seemed the four of them had planned a whole little afternoon for you, starting with lunch at an upscale restaurant in the city to which Max paid for you and Charles while Oscar and Lily covered themselves. On the way back to the car, you told him he didn’t need to do that but Charles just linked his arm in yours and told you that he insisted.

You had to admit it was a little nerve wracking being out in public and every time you felt the flutter of life move inside you, you tensed up as if everyone around you could tell. But no one ever looked up. Despite the comfort that your little group brought, you found yourself texting Lando on your way to your next destination.

-Hi you <3 I miss you

As he often did, he answered almost right away,

landonorris: Hi my love! I miss you too landonorris: How is your day? -It’s nice. My friends are taking me out somewhere fun for a surprise…although our group feels a little funny without you landonorris: Aww 🥰 landonorris: Glad they are keeping my two favourite people busy in my absence landonorris: Taking good care of you? -They always do -FT later? landonorris: Yep! 8:00 like always? -Can we do 7? I can’t wait that long landonorris: Of course baby 🧡 landonorris: Go enjoy your day now 🧡 -🧡🧡

“Sappy.” Lily sang over your shoulder as she spied on your messages.

You held your phone to your chest shyly, mumbling defensively, “Not nice to peek.”

“Yeah, he could have sent an inappropriate picture.” Oscar added.

“Ew!” Lily laughed as she sat back in her seat with Charles shaking his head with an amused smile between them. Max sent him a little smirk through the rearview mirror at the constant joking that occurred within your close knit group.

The Nouveau Musée National de Monaco was your surprise destination and you couldn’t help but let an excited smile come to your face at the sign that you passed into the parking lot. Your friends knew you too well and a quiet, peaceful day admiring artwork was something that you didn’t know you needed until you were there.

And peaceful it was as you navigated the exhibits together in a little herd, admiring painting after sculpture with your hands behind your back because otherwise you kept gravitating to touch your stomach. Your friends gave your sleeve a discreet tug every time you made that slip up. The five of you shared whispers here and there about what piece you were looking at, what you liked best, and even shared a few jokes when they were relevant (mostly pointing to the most ridiculous looking subjects and saying “that’s you”). You felt calm for the first time in a while.

Well, until management called.

When you didn’t answer his 7:00 FaceTime call, Lando figured you were just busy with friends and lost track of time. But when you didn’t answer his good night message or his good morning message, he started to get worried. His eyes were fixed to his phone as he got ready for class in the morning, your text thread opened with his unread messages staring back at him, his heart thudding hard in his chest as worst-case-scenarios flashed through his mind.

He couldn’t be blamed for triple and quadruple texting you throughout the morning, desperate for some sort of response. But even your friends weren’t answering him when he asked them if you were okay and by then Lando was ready to call every hospital in Monaco before his first class of the day even started. With his coat on and backpack over one shoulder, Lando stood at his desk and typed one last message to you, pleading for an answer until he nearly made himself sick with worry.

The sudden incoming call with your management office’s name across the screen had Lando’s eyes widening. Never had he spoken to your management before as all correspondence went through you. He glanced up at the black and white sonogram that was tacked to his bullet board over his desk as he answered the call and raised his phone to his ear, class forgotten.

“Hello?”

A strong male voice broke through the line, “Is this Lando Norris?”

He swallowed, “Yeah. Who’s asking?”

“This is Ennis from the Monaco Literary Talent Agency. Are you available to come to our office for a critical meeting this week?”

“Well…I actually have class. And I’m in England.” Lando tried to keep his voice steady and he sunk onto his desk chair, “What is this about?”

“You’re still romantically involved with our client and that has only created a huge problem for us and the PR team here at the office. We need everyone to convene as soon as possible to tackle the issue before it hits the press and smother this before it blows up in our faces. Since you are a part of this and ultimately causing lapses of judgement for our client and her responsibility that came with her signature on her contract, we’re going to need you to sit in on this meeting too or there will be legal repercussions.”

Lando’s face was pale, “When?”

“As soon as possible. Today. Your flight and accommodations will be paid for.”

“I have class. I can’t just-”

“We will get our lawyers involved if you don’t cooperate. Is that what you want us to do, Lando?”

He shook his head before realizing he had to answer out loud. “No. No, I can come. That’s fine.”

“Good. We will have a driver waiting for you. Gate 2. Please be prompt.”

“Okay.” Lando jumped in again before he could be hung up on, “Is she okay though? She hasn’t answered me. I’m worried if she’s okay.”

There was a beat of silence and then the manager answered him flatly, “It was not to her benefit to be in correspondence with you until this matter is settled. She is fine.”

The line went dead.

Lando slowly lowered his phone from his ear, his mouth dry, and he stared at the black and white sonogram in front of him for a moment. When he swore he was about to cry, he looked away again and got up from his desk chair to exchange his backpack for a suitcase. The threat of legal action against him was honestly not the biggest of his concerns as his heart ached with the concept of what they could be holding you with in that very moment. He only hoped that they were gentle on you; the last thing you needed was excess stress for both yourself and the baby.

When Lando boarded the bus to the airport, he had a private message waiting for him from Alex.

alex_albon: Hey Lan - have you heard from Lily recently?? She hasn’t answered me since yesterday landonorris: Yeah I was just about to message you. The group is in trouble with management and I got called to Monaco like NOW and was literally threatened with legal action if I didn’t go so 🙃 I’m on my way to airport now alex_albon: Wtf?? alex_albon: You’re joking landonorris: Nope. And idk what I’m walking in on either. Idk what information they have or what they know or why all of them aren’t allowed to talk to me or by extension, you landonorris: I’ll tell you more when I know more. I promise alex_albon: Please do alex_albon: And be safe and sane okay alex_albon: Text me or call me if you need anything landonorris: Fly to Monaco? Lol alex_albon: Omg I would if I could, mate alex_albon: I’m sending you strength. You got this!! landonorris: I love you so much dude alex_albon: Love you too!!

The entire flight to the Nice airport was near torture for Lando and especially so since you couldn’t answer him and he had virtually no clue what he was going to be walking into. The sunny Mediterranean welcomed him gladly - a cruel irony - and he walked through the airport with his suitcase and backpack unsure how long he would be staying. Just like when he first flew to Monaco to visit you at the beginning of the prior summer, a dark dressed man was waiting for him at the arrivals gate with a sign bearing his name on it.

Neither of them spoke a word as the driver loaded his bags in the car for him and Lando buckled up in the backseat, nervous to break the tense silence around the stony-faced man. The drive to the office was tense and Lando felt like his shirt was suffocating him, constantly tugging at the collar. He wondered if he should have changed before coming; he had panic packed after his phone call from your manager and thus didn’t even think about changing out of his school clothes of a grey t-shirt and jeans. He silently cursed himself for being so foolish and not thinking ahead. He couldn’t give your team one more reason to dislike him.

Your office building was all too familiar to him and Lando was let out on the curb with his suitcase and the driver drove off without any further instructions. On his own on the bustling street of downtown Monte Carlo, Lando peered up at the building and tried to calm his nerves by reminding himself that he was hopefully moments away from seeing you after so long. Better circumstances would have been preferred but he took what he got.

The floor of your office was eerily quiet for a weekday around early afternoon and the secretary glanced up at him from her desk when he stepped out of the elevator.

“Lando,” she greeted quietly, “They’re waiting for you in the conference room.”

He nodded at her politely in understanding, his mouth too dry to even think about forming words, and he walked around the partition into the main office space. Most of the desks were empty as if the team had been told to go home early for the day but a handful of employees were gathered at the far end and typing away together while whispering amongst themselves. Lando didn’t spare them more than a brief glance from across the office on his way past, even as they obviously stared at him. Your glass framed corner office was empty too and he passed by it to turn down the hallway that was lined with the meeting rooms, heading towards the large conference room at the opposite end of the floor.

The large cherry wood table housed a large number of people, half of whom Lando didn’t recognize, but your four best friends as well as Pierre and yourself were at one end together, looking like kids who had been caught with their hands in the candy jar. Frightened, ashamed, awaiting their punishment. The rest of the table was taken up by men in suits with a few well dressed women among them and Lando assumed it was your management team. He took a deep breath before pushing open the door to the crowded room, earning all eyes to look at him.

He hated being the centre of attention but to him, you were the only one in that room at that moment and your eyes shone at the sight of him. Even with Pierre at your side - a sight that would have normally sent Lando’s fight or flight instinct going in the past - Lando didn’t bat an eyelash at him and he made a beeline for you. You jumped up from your chair and threw yourself at him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and his easily took to your waist to hold you close, smiling softly at the obvious bump of your stomach that blocked your hug between you just a little. You had grown so much; your baby had grown so much.

In reality, your hug was to only whisper to him quickly what had happened, your lips grazing against his ear as you hurried out in a barely audible voice, “They made me take a pregnancy test. They know. Took my phone and kept me on watch in fear that I’d leak something to you.”

One of the men cleared their throats and you pulled away from Lando sheepishly, dragging your hand down his chest with a small melancholy smile. Your first time seeing him in so long and it was under these pretenses. He looked so good and you craved to kiss him. You had to look away or you might have cried.

“Thank you for joining us, Lando.” one of the men said formally.

Lando left his suitcase by the wall before he took the empty seat on your other side at the opposite head of the table, wanting to say ‘not like you gave me a choice’ but he merely pulled a tight smile and nodded in acknowledgement. Your four best friends were lined up on one length of the table with their heads down in near shame, not knowing where to look but all of their downcast gases were drifting in your direction. Max’s flat stare had Lando shifting nervously in his seat even though he was sure he did nothing wrong.

The head of your management team, Ennis, who had called Lando just that morning, began the meeting, introducing the few individuals representing the management team including himself, the few from PR and the few from HR. The HR department’s presence had Lando shifting nervously in his chair as his father’s words echoed in the back of his head, how he didn’t understand that you truly did not take advantage of him as your intern.

“This meeting was called in order to discuss how we will be moving forward from now on. For context for those of you who do not know, our client by contract has been working from home recently, canceling in person meetings, and limiting her social media usage to a worrisome degree. As PR and our team is aware, it is written in her contract that consistent social media presence is a crucial asset to marketing and creating a connection with her audience and her readers. Her constant statement of feeling ill led us to conduct a pregnancy test yesterday which did come back positive.”

Said test was dropped onto the table by one of the other management members, the screen face up in the Ziplock bag and the two pink lines very clear and visible since you were already so far along. Lando’s eyes widened at how bluntly they put your personal life on blast in a packed conference room and he glanced over at you on his left to see your stone flat face staring dumbly at the tabletop, your hands folded tightly in your lap.

One of the PR team spoke up, “Is it public knowledge?”

Your manager answered, “Not yet but we have seen and heard some speculations through our undercover accounts on various social media sites. Not enough to hit the mainstream news yet which gives us limited time to think of a way to cover our asses on this.”

“Who is the father?”

Everyone turned to you and you almost shrunk down into your chair, Lando staring wide eyed around the room as everyone stared as if expecting you to answer for yourself. He shyly raised his hand a few centimeters off the table. Everyone turned back to the manager for guidance, eyebrows around the room left furrowed in near concern. Lando wasn’t sure how this was anyone else’s business but he was intimidated and just let himself listen.

Your manager continued, “After the issue that arose in October of last year, our team had a serious conversation with the client about ending this relationship as it not only goes against her PR contract but it also will cause a complete hindrance to her social image which we cannot risk. It is clear now that she knew she was pregnant at that time and did not disclose this information to us, nor did she listen to our guidance in insisting that she end any and all contact with Mr. Norris.”

The team nodded in understanding. Lando noticed Charles faintly shaking his head in disbelief out of the corner of his eye.

Your manager continued, “This is why we have asked HR to be present at this meeting as the public knowledge of our client’s romantic relationship with her intern runs the risk of affecting our company and this contract.”

You scoffed, “It didn’t start in the summer-”

He interrupted you, “And what if he sues you?”

Lando’s head snapped from you to the manager in shock.

You answered sternly, “He won’t.”

“He’s a middle class kid from Bristol who had a summer fling with his favourite author and now has the chance to make a big buck off of it. Who wouldn’t take that? Humans tear each other down to push themselves up, it’s natural.”

Lando was stunned to silence, his mouth dry and agape at the assumption.

Oscar spoke up next, with a short tone that Lando had only ever heard him use once back when he had pushed the paparazzi away from you during a dinner in the summer, “Don’t you dare speak to them like that.”

Everyone turned to him and your lineup of friends down one side of the table.

Your manager pointed a warning finger at him, “You’re not in a position to be making threats that could have you fired, young man.”

Oscar’s eyes narrowed, “Go ahead. I don’t work for you; I work for her.”

“Osc.” you spoke softly, as if telling him it wasn’t worth it.

“They’re our friends.” Charles spoke up, gesturing to you and Lando, “And you know nothing about them.”

Oscar added, “And you certainly know nothing about Lando because you haven’t bothered trying to.”

“Gentlemen,” your manager spoke sternly, “That’s enough or I will ask you to leave this office immediately.”

Max’s arm went protectively around the back of Charles’s chair, his ever-observing eyes staring down his nose at the man in charge. Lando, with his heart racing, looked back to the group of higher ups, waiting for what was going to come next out of this tense conversation.

Trying to explain himself calmly, your manager re-worded his argument as he directed towards you, “It looks bad to have you appearing as if you were cheating on a man of such high standing with a fan…your intern of all people. That opens a whole other can of legal worms that the public could rise up with. It would ruin your reputation.

Lando’s eyebrows furrowed for a moment at the offside comment in comparison to Pierre. Ever since Lando had first followed you months and near years ago, he had always silently compared himself to Pierre - your boyfriend, who he soon came to learn was all a PR stunt - but it was a hard pill to swallow. The entire world only knew Pierre as your other half. To the world, Lando was the sidepiece. It just wasn’t true but what was to be done about it? Clearly even your team wasn’t on his side…the stupid little fanboy from England. How could he ever compare to the handsome brunette French actor that was the shining star of your Instagram feed?

“We want to be proactive here.” your manager continued. “We want to anticipate how the public is going to react to the news of this pregnancy because it will get out at one point or another.”

Another one of the team members spoke up, “We should push the idea that she and Pierre are together. Use this as a way to solidify their relationship.”

Your manager thought for a moment before he actually smiled and agreed with ease, “Yes. We can prepare a post announcing the pregnancy and pass this kid off as Pierre’s. Rehash the idea that our client is in a stable and normal relationship and there is nothing shady that is going on behind the scenes.”

Pierre and Lando made eye contact from over you before both looking away just as quickly. Lando could feel his heart in his throat, like he was going to throw it up on the table. Your small sniffle from beside him didn’t help the protective anger that was thudding in his chest and bubbling up like bile in his stomach. How dare they make your decisions for you.

Your little group watched the discussion between the higher ups like a tennis match across the table, Lando’s chest burning hotter and clenching tighter with his fists in his lap the longer he heard it.

“We’ll have them all sign an NDA, sweep this under the rug and put it behind us.”

“She should address the pictures from October and offer a public apology.”

“She was pregnant and seduced by this fan and she felt badly for him.”

Lando looked over at you and the way your eyes shimmered with tears as you stared at the edge of the table with a trembling pout. One wrong word and you were going to burst into tears. Lando frowned deeper and turned back to the discussion going on around him, ignorant to the way your friends stared at him, waiting for the red of his cheeks to blow into a silence of the bullshit that filled the airtime. This wasn’t their fight to have.

“It makes sense for it to be Pierre’s kid…they’ve been together so long.”

“The public loves them together too. A baby would only enhance their audiences. We’ll probably trend!”

“We could set up a gender reveal. Livestream it even!”

“Pierre would make the perfect father figure too. He’s got the look.”

Lando stood up so fast that his chair rolled away from behind him and he cut into the conversation that didn’t include him but was all about him, shouting across the lengthy wood table to the broad man at the other end, “Shut up! You think you can just dictate what we do with our lives? You have no say over me and no grounds to sue me if I decline to your insane ideas. This is my child you’re discussing!”

His voice was wavering with emotion and you could see the way his body trembled from where he stood beside you. But he was seeing red and there was nothing he ever hated more than someone hurting you. From hate comments on your posts to invasive interview questions to now this? Lando couldn’t take it.

He was yelling now, ignorant to any scene he was making in your workplace, “This is my baby! You have no right to replace me with some fake boyfriend who has no connection to this child and nothing to do with this pregnancy! How long are you planning on carrying this lie? Huh? Because it’s going to be pretty damn hard when I’m the one with her constantly…the one taking her to the doctors appointments and the hospital and signing my fucking name on the birth certificate!”

Your manager cut in smoothly, “Oh, you’re not going to be.”

Lando literally laughed humorlessly, “Like hell I won’t be! That is my baby, and my girlfriend, and I would give up my life for them in a heartbeat. I will not sit by and let you ruin my family because you’re scared of what a few stupid strangers on the internet would say about it. Grow up! You’re grown-ass adults! If we don’t give a shit about what people have to say about us, then why do you? You are not a part of this! I’m sick and tired of walking on eggshells in fear of you! Stop ruining everyone else’s lives because you’re too miserable with your own!”

“It’s deeper than that, Lando.” your manager told him slowly, “You don’t understand because you’re not part of-”

“No!” Lando slammed his fist against the table to cut him off angrily, “I’m sick and tired of people just seeing me as this kid who doesn’t know a thing about life. You’re talking over me like I don’t have a voice of my own. You don’t know a thing about me! You don’t know who I am or what I do and you especially don’t seem to know that I love your client more than anyone else in the world. Fuck that ‘my client’ shit too, by the way. She has a name. She’s a human being who has feelings and opinions and ideas and really fucking good ideas too and I love her! She’s not your stupid doll to puppet around like this is a big game! I won’t let you! I’m sick of this and I’m sick of seeing how your rules affect her and make her miserable! I love her more than life itself and I refuse to sit here and let you ruin the life that we are building together. She is incredible and she deserves more than you pathetic money-hungry idiots. She deserves to have a real life and a real family and she deserves to be loved…like really loved.”

Lando faded out as his adrenaline dwindled and he suddenly clued in that he was standing in the middle of the conference room screaming at an entire board of managers and relation teams from the depth of his heart. He swallowed back the anxious gag in his throat and then tore his wide eyes away from the shocked men to look down at you sitting beside him. You were staring up at him in near awe with tears free falling down your cheeks and his gaze shifted just past you to Pierre who looked just as impressed as he was shocked.

“And Pierre.” Lando found himself saying, much quieter now although his voice was still wavering, “Pierre deserves to find real love too. None of this fake crap with a kid that isn’t is. He needs to find a girl of his own to have a real kid with when he’s ready like he’s supposed to.”

The young men shared little smiles and appreciative half nods.

Then Lando was bending down to you and wiping your tears from your cheek with his thumb, whispering against your temple softly, “Come on. We’re going.”

“We can’t.” you sniffled.

“I don’t care. We’re going.” he said a little louder, his voice serious but his words gentle.

You simply nodded and took his hand to let him guide you to your feet and you wiped your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodie. Your friends started to get up too.

“No, no.” your manager warned. “You leave when I tell you that you can leave.”

Max finally spoke, his tone deadly serious and stern, “We’ll be back when you choose to have empathy and are willing to hear her own needs.”

Lando led the little group of you out of the conference room door, holding you under one arm and his suitcase being rolled by his other hand and he didn’t look back as he steered you down the hallway, your friends following quickly behind you.

Once you were all a few paces away, your friends shared excited little whispers amongst themselves in disbelief that you all just staged a little walkout but Lando was only focused on you and how you shivered under his arm. He leaned his head in to be right in your space with his fingers scratching tenderly against your shoulder and you looked back at him in your close proximity and leaned your forehead against his.

“It’s going to be okay.” he promised quietly as Lily pressed the call button for the elevator under the intense stare of the secretary a few paces away.

You nodded, closing your eyes to only focus on the way he held you under his arm.

“I love you so much.” he whispered. “I’m not letting them do anything to you or our baby.”

“I love you.” you sighed shakily and slid your arms around his middle to pull him into an embrace.

He kissed your head and let his other arm join his first around your shoulders, running his fingers through your hair soothingly before caressing your back in gentle rubs. When the elevator dinged and the doors slid open, you pulled away from each other and he guided you into the elevator first. You sniffled and wiped your nose with the sleeve of your hoodie as you stepped inside and your friends followed you. You were surprised no one had chased you out to drag you back to the meeting room by your hair.

Charles pressed the button for the parking garage and your friends let you and Lando have your quiet moment in the corner of the elevator the whole way down. He barely let you stray farther than a few inches away and he kept you under his arm protectively as you shivered with anxiety and stress, your teeth chattering. But you held onto the front of his shirt in a tight fist as if scared he was going to be taken away from you again and your gently closed eyelids had your lashes fluttering against your teary cheeks.

Lando’s lips brushed against your ear as he whispered reassuring words to you, “Take some deep breaths for me, sweetheart. We don’t want to give our baby any extra stress right now and it’s not good for you either.”

You nodded weakly.

He kissed your cheek and then habitually breathed with you as you took in a slow deep breath through your nose, both of you needing it.

Moments later, the elevator doors slid open to reveal the parking garage lobby and Lando spoke to you quietly, “Let’s get you home.”

Max’s SUV was parked within the rows of cars and the shiny black exterior stood out from the others. When he unlocked it with a chirp, Lando’s eyes would have normally gone wide at the impressive expensive car you were all about to climb into but his attention and his lingering adrenaline was focused all on you. No one bothered to offer you the front seat since it was clear you weren’t going to let go of Lando even if someone paid you and so Oscar opened the back door for you and Lando helped you climb in. Max loaded Lando’s suitcase into the trunk and he and Charles took to the front seat themselves while Lily and Oscar wiggled into the third row, leaving you and Lando to have your room in the second row.

In the safety and familiarity of Max’s leather seats and Lando’s arms, you were starting to calm down and by the time the SUV drove out into the Monaco sun, your anxiety induced shivering had stopped. Lando’s arm was still around your shoulders and his other hand held your two on his lap, welcoming the way you so easily curled into his side even when you were both buckled in your seatbelts. The drive was quiet as no one really knew what to say and you were honestly thankful for that.

Staring down at your intertwined hands, you gently traced the lines of Lando’s fingers with your head resting against his comfortably. He moved to kiss your temple before resting his head back down against yours, rubbing his thumb over yours for a few strokes.

“I missed you so much.” you sniffled.

“I missed you like crazy.” Lando gave your hand a squeeze.

You leaned your head back slightly against his shoulder so you could look at his face and he gladly met your teary gaze. His eyes drifted to your lips, watching how you formed your quiet sentence, “That was incredible what you did in there.”

He shrugged modestly, whispering back to you, “I’ll always protect you.”

“I love you.” you breathed.

“I’m in love with you.” he countered.

You broke into a slight smile to correct yourself quietly, for only him to hear, “I’m in love with you, Lando Norris.”

He tightened his arm around your shoulder to guide you in for a soft, long awaited kiss. You both lingered there for a moment, smiling faintly into your chasté kiss in your getaway car together, and when you pulled away, you cuddled back into his side with your arm around his middle. Amidst everything, you were just excited to be able to take him home.

When Max pulled into the parking garage of your apartment, you thanked him for the drive and then said your goodbyes to your friends as the two young men got out to retrieve Lando’s suitcase. Your friends had you promise to keep them up to date with everything and they swore they had your back no matter what…but you needed to take that night and turn off your phone and just be with Lando for a little while. You had no objections to that idea.

Lando was waiting with Max on the pavement with his bag when you stepped out of the car and Max moved right in to give you a one armed hug. He spoke to you seriously when he pulled away, “If they call you, don’t answer. Tell me and I will deal with them.”

You nodded and promised and you said your goodbyes. Lando took your hand and led you up to your door.

“Sorry it’s a mess.” you whispered as you unlocked it and stepped inside.

Lando glanced at the dishes in the kitchen sink and the papers scattered over the dining room table and the few stray worn socks that littered your living room floor but he merely shrugged, dusting his fingers over the small of your back as he followed you farther into your house, “It’s okay. I’m not worried about the mess. Just you. Are you feeling a little calmer, my love?”

You set your purse on the kitchen island as you turned to him with a small smile, “Yeah. Thanks to you.”

“Of course.” Lando set his hands on your waist, “What did you want to do now? Do you want to nap? I know you said you haven’t been getting much sleep.”

“I wanna kiss you.” you said, pulling him closer by the front of his shirt.

Lando just licked away his smile and leaned in towards you to meet you halfway in a proper kiss, one that you had been waiting for since October and in full privacy of your own home, it felt so easy again. You hummed softly in pleasant appreciation and your hands raised to the sides of his neck to hold his kiss for a little longer. Lando’s head spun with his adoration for you and he parted your lips with his own and tilted his head slightly to deepen your kiss, sliding his arms around your waist to pull you closer until the bump of your belly pressed against his stomach.

He laughed lightly into your kiss and went to pull away but you grabbed him by the back of his neck and yanked him back in for more kisses. His hands caressed your back lovingly and he spoke softly between your purposeful kisses, “Baby, I missed you so much if you keep this up I’m gonna get hard-”

“Good.” you answered easily, moving away from his lips for a second so you could speak right to him, “I’ve been so fucking horny recently…and all I want right now is for you to just fuck the thoughts from my head.”

“Fuck.” Lando chuckled breathily at your blunt demand and as your lips went for his neck, he tilted his head back to give you room, speaking to the ceiling, “Okay, but let me take you to your room first.”

His hands fell into yours and soon you were following after him down the hallway to your bedroom; a place he knew well after your summer together. It had been so long since you last saw each other that you were almost bursting with excitement; no help from the second trimester that had your libido through the roof. Your plentiful FaceTime calls and risqué text messages were not sufficing and you would have given anything to feel his hands on your body properly. Now, as if a dream, he was there with you in your bedroom and pulling your sweater off purposefully.

You held him by the side of his neck and kissed the air from his lungs, wanting him impossibly closer as the curve of your growing stomach prevented him from touching you completely. His hands caressed your full hips that had only grown with pregnancy and then over the swell over your stomach that housed his baby. You had often sent him selfies and pictures over the weeks so he could track your growth from a distance but seeing it in person was so much better.

With a soft hum of appreciation, Lando pulled away from your lips to let his gaze fall to your taut skin under his hands. The stretch marks wriggled across your abdomen and hips and his fingers traced them delicately as he took in the sight of you before him like you were nothing less than ethereal. You held onto his biceps, letting him stare at you, and he gently guided you backwards towards your bed to sit you down on the side. Then he was sinking to his knees in front of you and pulling your sweatpants down your legs right along with your underwear to discard them to the floor and leave you in only your bra in front of him. His eyes darted over your body like he wasn’t sure where he wanted to look first and he finally settled on the roundness of your stomach, leaning in to press a soft kiss right there.

“My God, you’re even more beautiful in person.” he whispered faintly, his warm breath fanning across your skin. He guided your legs apart and kissed down the curve of your belly until settling between your legs with a tender kiss to your cunt.

“It’s not…tidy…down there.” you mumbled, resting back on your hands against the bed.

“Don’t care.” Lando answered easily before gliding his tongue between your lips. He missed how you tasted - so perfectly sweet and addicting - and he greedily went in for more.

You stared down at him and how the small bump of your abdomen hid him slightly from your view so all you were blessed with was the sight of his unruly brown hair between your legs. The feeling of his lips and tongue blessing your pussy with the sweetest kisses and licks had your nose scrunching up in pleasure and your eyes fluttering closed to bask in the sensations you had waited too long for.

His hands took to your thighs and guided your legs up so you could rest your heels on the edge of the bed and leave yourself spread open for his eager mouth. His thumbs rubbed warmly over the flesh of your thighs as he made out sloppily with your cunt and let his nose ghost over your aching clit, tending to you so lovingly after so long that you swore tears were pricking the corners of your eyes. Your hormones were going awol.

“Oh, God, Lando, I love you.” you whimpered to the ceiling.

He pulled away just long enough to reply, “I love you too.”

Lando could never get enough of the way you whimpered and moaned under his touch; it was truly better than how it sounded in his imagination all those months ago. It was hard to believe that not even a year before he was still sitting alone in his dorm room with only the company of your published words and your social media. Now he was eating you out on your bed in your apartment in Monaco while you were pregnant with his child. Life was surreal.

There was nothing else either of you could do but focus on the good to push away the bad for the time being.

“Mm, baby,” you reached a hand down to raked through his hair, “can we switch?”

Lando pulled away from your pussy with a soft slurp and a little glossy pout, “Already?”

“Yeah…I really wanna suck your dick.” you pleaded.

He would never decline that - especially after months of going without any sort of touch from you - and so he stood up without question and started to unbuckle his jeans. You dropped your legs back down over the side of the bed and reached to help him, licking your lips impatiently as you unzipped his pants and started to pull them down. Lando tugged his shirt off in the meantime and soon you were both perfectly bare in front of each other.

His fingers danced through your hair lovingly as you wrapped a hand around his hard cock and let a little dribble of spit fall from your lips onto the head of it. You leaned down slightly to wrap your mouth around it and his hand followed you gently as you sucked softly on the smooth tip. Lando’s wavering little exhale had your heart skipping a beat and you sunk your mouth down lower, starting to suck him off in lazy little bobs of your head.

But you soon pulled off him quickly and rested your free hand against his faint abs to get him to back up a little, giving yourself room to slip carefully off the side of the bed and onto your knees in front of him. Lando’s wide eyes stared down at you and his expression fluttered as you sank your mouth down around his cock again, taking him nice and deep in your warm wet mouth.

“Oh my God, baby.” he whispered shakily, taking your hair back into a ponytail in his gentle hands, “You’re such a good girl.”

Your gentle hand gave him soft strokes in time with your mouth for a few seconds before your mouth was pulling away to let your hand do the work, confessing up to him easily from your knees, “The way you stood up for me in there…and our baby…was so fucking hot.”

You kissed the tip of his dick.

“You’re so fucking hot.”

Another kiss to the tender spot right under the head. It made his thighs flinch slightly.

“Fuck, I missed you so bad.” you rushed out before guiding his dick back into your mouth.

Lando’s head dropped to the side with a tight groan from his throat, his eyes struggling to stay open with how perfect your mouth felt - no comparison to his hand from the last few months. He promised you in reply, “I missed you more.”

You moaned around his cock and kept your motions going until you were gagging yourself on it and smothering yourself deeper until you could take your hand away. Lando’s eyelids fluttered through a deep groan as he hit the back of your throat and you set your hands on his ass to pull him right in until your nose touched his pelvis. The feeling of your throat constricting around him had his hands tightening in your hair and when you gagged loudly around him, you had to pull back. Strings of spit connected your lips to the tip of his dick and Lando watched in near awe as you wrapped your hand around him again and quickly started stroking him off again, even slick in your spit that dribbled down your chin.

“God, I’m so horny.” you exhaled, staring lustfully at his cock in your face. Your other hand helped itself between your legs to ease some of the ache that was growing, rubbing your clit in lazy circles as you let your tongue swirl around the head of Lando’s dick with your hand taking the lead of the motions. You whispered against it in near disbelief, “I can’t believe our baby came from this. You and this perfect dick of yours got me pregnant.”

Lando laughed faintly, “Don’t say that or I’ll cum.”

You giggled sweetly at him and wrapped your lips around the tip for a little suckle before pulling back again, “You have such a breeding kink.”

“So what?”

“So it’s kinda hot.” you answered, “And you’re already standing up for our little family. You’re gonna be such a good daddy.”

“Sweetheart,” Lando sighed, “Seriously.”

“I know, I know,” you bit back your smile as your hand kept pumping his thick cock, “I could feel you throbbing when I said that.”

He hummed pleasantly and you flicked your tongue over the underside of his dick, staring up at him sweetly to watch how his expression changed with pleasure. Your hand moved a bit faster and your lips wrapped around the head with your tongue teasing the slit, pulling the sweetest moan from his chest that had your cunt pulsing.

“Fuck,” you pulled away from him again, “I need you inside me so fucking bad right now.”

“Okay,” Lando answered without missing a beat, “Get on the bed.”

You stood up in front of him with help from his hand for a bit of balance and you pulled him in by the back of his neck for a few sloppy kisses through your shared smiles before you were sitting on the side of the bed and scooting farther onto it. Lando crawled after you, and when you met in the middle of your familiar king size bed, he felt at home. Your lips met once more, sharing tongue-led kisses that had you reaching for his shoulders to keep him close - enamoured by him and his angelic kisses.

Lando broke away from your kiss to ask softly, “How are you most comfortable to do this?”

“I’m not allowed to be on my back.” you told him.

“I know.” he piped up easily, having consistently been following week by week pregnancy articles online throughout the process.

You kissed his lips once more before answering his question properly, “Maybe I’ll start on top?”

“Sure.”

You moved together to situate yourselves on your neatly made bed and Lando lounged back against the pillows and the headboard, helping to guide your leg to straddle his body. He licked his lips as he had that perfect view of you right in front of him and the growing curve of your belly called to his possessive hands.

“You’re so sexy.” he breathed. “So fucking beautiful.”

“Glad you still think so.” you chuckled lightly.

“Always.” Lando replied, caressing your full hips with his warm hands as you lifted up onto your knees.

He helped to angle his dick for you and you shuffled closer upwards so it could press right up against your leaking pussy. You were so wet that he let out a shaky breath at only the first teasing touch, desperate to sink into you after so long. He had gone twenty-one years without any touch from a woman and maybe in some way life was holding him out for you - you were his first and to be his only. Having to return to abstinence for a few months while you struggled with your management was nearly torture for the both of you but especially for Lando.

“Ready, boyfriend?” you asked, a sweet reminder that this was only your second time as officially dating - and only your first time that would actually (hopefully) see a satisfied conclusion for the both of you.

“Ready, beautiful girlfriend.” he nodded, trying to hide his grin.

“Compared to your ugly girlfriend you keep on the side?” you teased.

“Shush, there’s no one but you and you know it.” Lando tisked lightly, impatiently sliding the head of his cock between your glistening lips.

You grabbed his wrist, “Keep him still.”

“Gimme it, baby.” he exhaled. “I need you so bad.”

You held his wrist snugly as you slowly sank down on him, letting the head of his cock slip inside you snugly and your nose scrunched up at the stretch after so long. Lando’s free hand rubbed your thigh comfortingly as you whimpered slightly at the ache across your pelvis muscles that had been working to house your growing baby for the prior weeks.

“Good girl.” he praised softly, trying to hide the wavering of his voice that was caused by how good you felt around him, so tight and warm that he swore he was getting dizzy, “Nice and slow, sweetheart.”

“You’re so fucking big, it kinda hurts.” you pulled a strained little smile up at him.

“You’re not new to it.” he laughed lightly.

“Mm, no.” you agreed proudly, “This dick is all mine.”

Lando groaned at your words and the warmth of your pussy that sank down on more of him and he merely offered you a “mhm” in acknowledgement.

You set both your hands on his chest as you got lower and Lando held onto your hips, staring down his body to watch how his dick disappeared inside you slowly. He licked his lips and spread his legs a little wider, his eyebrows raising slightly as he watched you bottom out in near awe, filling him entirely inside your perfect body.

“Oh, fuck, I missed this.” you sniffled, dropping your head back to try and keep your hormones at bay.

“Me too. You feel so fucking good, baby.” Lando breathed.

“I missed you so fucking much.” you whimpered.

“I’m right here.” Lando promised, “Not going anywhere, sweetheart…I’m right here.”

You started to grind down on him in little back and forth motions to feel him tucked up so deeply inside you and your eyes closed peacefully to just bask in it for a second. His hands slid up the silhouette of your body and traced the lace of your bra and you allowed him to take it off you. Over the previous months he had seen your growing breasts through FaceTime chats but in person was just so much better. He dropped your bra to the ground in exchange for his hands to gently grope them with full palms as you rode him lazily with those purposeful grinds, his fingers on your sensitive nipples earning sweet moans from your mouth.

With your hands anchored strongly on his chest, you started to raise yourself up on your knees in more vertical strokes, earning a tight inhale from him as the snug squeeze of your cunt pulled along the length of his cock and back down. You were both sharing heavy breaths and peaceful moans, taking the afternoon slowly and savouringly, basking in the pleasure that you had long missed together.

“You’re so gorgeous.” Lando breathed, unable to tear his eyes away from your maternal body sitting on his lap. You were the epitome of a dream come true for him.

You smiled down at him as you bounced faintly on his cock and let his hands knead your swollen breasts. All that mattered in that moment was him.

To Lando, all that mattered was you as he asked you sweetly, “Does this feel good for you, my love?”

“Yeah. Feels really fucking good.” you chuckled breathily. “You?”

“Yeah, it’s amazing.” he nodded, “View is pretty good too.”

You let out a soft chuckle and shifted your hands from his chest to rest on the bed between his spread legs behind you, giving you a new angle, and his hands were taken from your chest to slide down to rest tenderly on your swollen belly. Lando stared at you as you started to bounce on him shallowly again, your limited movement making it look more like slight flicks of your hips in that consistent rhythm but the spring of the mattress helped you greatly.

As your eyes closed, your mouth fell open with a trembling moan, “Oh fuck, that’s it.”

“Good girl.” Lando whispered, keeping his eyes on you.

He licked his lips as he stared at your legs spread on either side of his body and the sight of your body not straying far from his before falling back down with a faint clap of skin over and over again. Your whimpers and moans were heaven to him and he let you set the pace however you needed, simply caressing the tight skin over your abdomen and the fleshy dough of your hips.

Your eyebrows furrowed slightly and your lips fell into a soft pout despite the pitchy moan that filled your bedroom as you rode him consistently with his dick nudging your g-spot straight on. It grew the pleasure inside you tightly but it came on fast and it felt incredibly overwhelming, especially after so long apart, that it made your face scrunch up in what could pass as agony.

“Oh God.” you whimpered, your voice quivering as if you were near tears, “Oh, I’m gonna cum.”

“That’s it, beautiful, cum for me.” Lando encouraged angelically,

“Oh, fuck, Lando-” you choked out.

Your breath caught in your throat and he watched in awe as your head dropped backwards and you gaped up to the ceiling with screwed tight eyes just as your pussy clenched down hard around him and you kept bouncing on his lap right through it. You squealed pitchily as your hands fisted the sheets behind you and your nose scrunched up in the cutest way he had ever seen.

“Shit,” Lando hissed, pressing his fingers into the flesh of your thighs, “that’s my good fucking girl.”

“Fuck.” you heaved for breath and fluttered your eyes open as you lifted your heavy head to look back at him, “Didn’t know I was gonna cum that fast…I’m fucking sensitive.”

Lando smiled adoringly up at you as you straightened up on top of him again and set your palms flat on his chest once more. You took a deep breath and let it out with a refreshing sigh, swirling your hips ever so slowly on his lap to bask in the bliss of it all.

“Yeah, just take a second to catch your breath.” Lando rubbed his warm hands over your flushed skin. “My good girl.”

You smiled adoringly to the air between you and your gaze found his fondly before you slowly lifted yourself up and then back down the length of his dick, pulling a tight moan from his chest. You breathed deeply for him as you moved slowly, riding out the ends of your toe-curling orgasm that you had waited near months for, just wanting to savour the feeling of his perfect cock buried deeply inside you.

Soon, you were shifting on top of him and situating your feet underneath you so you were squatting over his lap and Lando rubbed his hands over your thighs, whispering in cautious concern, “Oh, that’s going to be hard on your knees, baby.”

“That’s okay.” you whispered. “I want to be good for you.”

“You are always good for me, my love. Here, can we switch? I just wanna take care of you.”

When you nodded, he leaned up on his elbows to kiss your lips and then you were carefully sliding off his lap, wincing faintly at the feeling of his cock slipping out of you and leaving you empty. Lando moved quickly so you weren’t left lost for long and he situated himself behind you on his knees, leaving you only needing to rest forward on your hands from the position you were already in. He licked his fingers and slid them between your legs, smearing your slick pussy wetter as much as he wanted as he tended to your swollen cunt with warm caresses, mouthing a silent ‘fuck’ to the air at how the mere feeling of you had his cock throbbing.

“Spread your legs a little wider, sweetheart.” Lando instructed gently, helping you to shuffle your knees a bit farther apart and he kept his at a close angle just behind you, allowing his hips to be perfectly level with yours. He rubbed your hips, “This comfortable for you?”

“Yeah, it’s good.” you flipped your hair over one shoulder so you could try and look back at him.

Lando gladly kept your eye contact as he carefully guided his thick cock into you again, his mouth falling open slightly at the snug fit of your body nearly pulling him in. He had to break your lustful stares to watch himself bottom out inside you until his hips were pressed snugly against the flesh of your ass. When you wiggled back onto him a little, you could feel the faint hair that dotted his pelvis brush against your soft skin. You hummed contently and started to rock forwards and backwards to fuck yourself on him impatiently.

“Hey, hey,” Lando tisked and took hold on your hips, “that’s my job.”

You giggled sweetly and bit your smiling lip as you stared back at him over your shoulder and he started to fuck you lazily. A soft hum of appreciation fell from your mouth and your eyes fluttered shut.

“There we go.” Lando breathed.

Going nice and slowly after the build up of months apart was only half ideal because part of him just wanted to fuck the shit out of you, but the addition of your little life growing inside you, he also wanted to be extra careful. Savouring it all was just as good, making sweet love to you had always been his favourite dream after all.

You whispered your polite demand to the room, “Faster, please.”

Lando caressed your hips and started to thrust into you a little faster until he had a good gentle speed going.

Humming in appreciation, you spoke again, “Yeah, this speed but harder.”

Slightly hesitant, Lando only gave you a little bit more intensity just until your skin started to make that lewd little clapping sound together.

“Mm, more. Fuck me harder.” you huffed.

“I don’t wanna hurt you.” Lando protested.

“I’m not a fucking flower, baby, I won’t break.” you retorted, “Beat it up, come on. I’ll tell you if it’s too much.”

Lando took your word for it and let his instincts take over as he shoved into you with sharper precision at that same ideal speed you had him keep. Your deep groan only solidified that it was perfectly okay and he slid his hands up your back to grasp your shoulders as he gently held you back into his every thrust, the bed creaking underneath you in time with him.

“Fuck, yeah, that’s so good.” you moaned, fisting the bed sheets under your straight arms. “Oh my God.”

“That’s my pretty girl.” Lando exhaled, staring down at how your ass jiggled with every hard thrust, “Fuck, you feel incredible.”

He fucked the whimpers from your throat in steady time, gradually getting louder and louder as your eyes screwed shut. Lando slid his hands down your back and grabbed your doughy hips again, tugging you back harshly into every thrust as he hit as deep as he could with any possible hesitation vanished from his mind with how you reacted to him. You cried out with pure raw pleasure, your voice wavering with tears from how good it felt, and he spanked your ass out of habit.

“Yeah, spank me.” you pleaded, earning another hard smack to your ass and then another.

“Dirty girl.” Lando chuckled lowly, his words laced with breathlessness as he pounded into you at that addicting pace.

“Mm, mm, mm, mm-” your head dropped down and in seconds you were flying a hand out to slam against the headboard, squealing loudly, “Fuck, I’m gonna cum again!”

“Good girl. That’s my good girl.” Lando praised lowly, propping one foot flat against the mattress for a better angle as he flawlessly kept that addicting pace, only making the slap of your skin louder in time with the creaking of the bed, “Cum for me, sweetheart.”

“Oh God, oh God, oh God-” you choked out, tightening your white-knuckled grip on the sheets until you were untucking them from the sides of the mattress. “Lando!”

“That’s it…cum for me. Cum on my cock.” his jaw clenched at the first feeling of you gripping around him again, “Yes, that’s it, beautiful, make me cum.”

You shuddered when you came and Lando’s hands tended to your hips warmly as he fucked you through your second orgasm, holding you up as your body desperately tried to slide down onto the mattress and away from the overwhelming pleasure. But he kept going, pounding into you roughly as you mewled and moaned for him until tears blurred your eyes.

“Oh my God, baby!” you sobbed out.

“I’m close-” Lando panted, his voice breaking slightly as he repeated, “I’m close-”

Despite the way your body trembled from overwhelm, you looked back at him over your shoulder and offered him the sweetest begging that you knew would do just the trick, “Cum inside me. Please, please, please cum inside me, Lan, I missed you so much.”

“Fuck,” Lando groaned, “That’s it.”

“Please fill me up.” You squeezed down on him, “Oh, God, I need it so bad.”

“Cumming-” Lando warned quickly before he, too, was tensing right up with the harsh wave of pleasure that hit him. His handsome face screwed up tightly, his mouth falling open in near awe, and he let out the most beautiful moan you had ever heard him make when you felt that first thick spurt release deep inside you.

“Fuck yeah.” you sighed pleasantly and ground your ass back against him as his thrusts slowed into lazy nudges.

“Ohhh, God.” Lando withered, slumping forward slightly until his hand caught his weight against the mattress. “Shit.”

“I could feel it pulsing inside me.” you giggled.

“Yeah,” Lando sniffled dryly, dropping his leg back down so he was kneeling properly, “I came so fucking hard.”

You slowly sat back on your knees and Lando moved with you to help you shift so your back was right up against his front and his hands slid around your hips and over your belly as you leaned your head back against his shoulder and pulled his lips onto yours. The two of you shared sloppy breathless kisses until your relieved and pleasured smiles got in the way and you had to break away from each other. Lando kissed your temple.

Your hands dragged over his forearms as he embraced you lovingly and fell to a stop over his hands that cradled your baby bump. You stayed there together for a moment, still intertwined as one and letting the highs of your orgasms wash into a glowing bliss all through you. Lando’s thumbs rubbed faintly over your skin and he kissed your neck before sighing contentedly into that same spot.

“I love you so much.” he whispered like a promise.

“I love you so much more.” you responded, lifting your head up to invite him for a kiss to your lips.

Then he was cautiously helping you shift away from him and both of you shared a little wince as his sensitive dick slipped out of you and left you empty once again. You carefully turned around and slumped backwards against your pillow with a content but tired sigh, draping one arm over your head with your other habitually gravitating to the curve of your abdomen. Lando joined you at your side and you naturally turned away from him so he could cuddle up behind you, fitting your blushing bodies together like two perfect puzzle pieces meant to be.

Lando hid his grinning smile into your hair and breathed in the scent of your floral shampoo as he slid his arm under your neck and his other draped around your middle to join your hand on your belly.

“Twenty-two weeks tomorrow.” you stated softly.

“Mhm.” Lando smiled against your shoulder, caressing your little growing life with his thumb, “Baby is the size of a papaya this week.”

You giggled, “Have you ever seen a papaya in real life?”

“No, but I’m sure they aren’t as beautiful as our baby.”

“I don’t think a baby and a fruit are accurately comparable.”

Lando kissed along your shoulder, “Sure they are. And our baby wins every time.”

“Of course.”

You leaned back slightly to pucker out your lips and he dipped in for a sweet kiss or two.

He kissed your neck when you turned away from him again and his hand rubbed warmly over your belly. Your fingers wiggled their way under his to get him to hold your hand and then you brought your joint hands up to your lips to kiss his knuckles before returning them back to your baby.

Lando confessed to you quietly as you had your moment’s peace, “You look so beautiful…more than ever.”

“Thank the pregnancy for that.” you replied.

“Oh, I do.” he assured you, “I always knew you would be fucking gorgeous pregnant with my baby and look…I was right!”

You laughed lightly and he nuzzled a kiss into your neck. Then he continued gently with his little confession, “And when I came into that room today and got my first real look at you after what felt like forever…you took my breath away all over again. Just like you did when I first met you on that book tour last year in Bristol. And when you hugged me and I could feel our baby against me for the first time? It was so incredible.”

There was a pause and you didn’t answer, letting the airtime be taken up by your fingers dancing lazily with his. Lando gave your hand a squeeze as if making sure you were still awake.

You finally replied, but not like how he had anticipated, “I’m sorry about today.”

He tisked, “You have nothing to be sorry about. None of this is your fault.”

Bubbling up with hormones and emotions that you had suppressed for a while, your voice broke as you shared a confession of your own, “I just wanted to write books.”

Lando’s heart nearly shattered at the simple yet weighty presence of your words and he held you a little tighter, “Oh, my darling, I know.”

A sob fell from your lips and you raised your joint hands up again to hide your face in embarrassment, “I didn’t want all of this shit with it.”

“I know.” Lando sighed, “You don’t deserve this. Not at all. I wish I could just make it all go away for you.”

“And now you’re dragging into this and I’m ruining your life.”

“Hey.” Lando propped himself up on his arm so he could look at you properly. You hid your face in your hands but he pulled them away, speaking to you sternly but sweetly, “You have done nothing but make my life better. I have told you before and I will tell you again that you are my biggest dream come true. There has never been one second since meeting you that I ever thought that my life was worse off because of you…and especially from things that are not your fault.”

“Please don’t ever leave me.”

Lando swallowed back his own tears and he leaned down to kiss your tear streaked cheek, holding onto you like he was never going to let you, “I will never leave you. I would never dream of it. I’d never find another you.”

You wiped your tears with the heel of your palm and Lando sighed pitifully at the way you trembled in his arms. He kissed your shoulder and caressed the soft skin of your growing belly and tried to make you feel every ounce of his love in his heart that he wasn’t quite sure how to express out loud.

“I hate the way they treat you.” he whispered, dusting another kiss to your shoulder, “No one should be making you feel this low.”

You sniffled and leaned your head back slightly to look him in the eye, “And you stood up for me.”

“Of course.” Lando kissed your lips once. “No one hurts my girl or tries to break up my family.”

You reached up to slide your hand around the back of his neck and pulled him into another lingering kiss. When you parted, he sighed softly against your cheek and you closed your eyes with an exhale of your own to just feel the warmth of his body against your own.

“I love you.” you mumbled.

“I love you so much.” Lando kissed your cheek again.

You let your eyes find his in your close proximity, dancing your fingers through the back of his hair as you confessed to him in a whisper, “They all told me - even Max at one point or another - not to get involved with fans because it can be risky and messy…but honestly it was the best decision of my life. I thought you were cute from the second I saw you but something about you just made me want to trust you and give you a chance and…I can’t even remember what life was like before you and it hasn’t even been a year yet.”

Lando smiled fondly at you, “Crazy, huh? Hasn’t even been a year since we met.”

“Feels like forever though.” you added.

“In the best way.”

“Mhm.”

You shared another kiss.

The faint nudge against Lando’s palm had him pulling away from your lips with a gasp, turning to look down at your small belly that was growing your little life. He had been away from you for so long that he missed so much and this was a new development that he had only heard about from you over your late night calls.

“There’s baby saying hi.” you smiled.

Another little bump against his hand and Lando was breaking into a grin, “Oh my gosh. Hi, little one.”

It was only the smallest of feelings since the baby was still tiny and limbs hadn’t grown full strength yet but Lando was completely enamoured by the little flutters that came from inside you. He rubbed his hand over your belly and the movement almost seemed to follow his touch.

“Crazy, huh?” you said.

“Yeah. It’s incredible.” he breathed, “That’s our baby in there.”

“Mhm.” you smiled and leaned your head back to look at him again.

You watched his face for a moment as he stared, focused and in awe, at your growing baby you held so lovingly inside you. His heart soared and for a second, you thought he might cry by the shimmer of his light eyes.

Your thumb dusted across his cheek and you spoke to him softly, “I love you.”

He finally met your gaze and shared in your gentle smile, “I love you.”

The two of you shared a kiss and Lando melted back down into the bed behind you to cuddle you close with his protective hand still resting on your abdomen with yours on top. In your room, in the imperfect city of Monte Carlo, in a life Lando only ever thought he would achieve in his dreams, you were one.

He sealed his promise to you then and there, telling you with words stemming from all the love in his heart that he carried just for you, “All I have ever dreamt about and all I ever need in the whole world, I have right here.”

Tag List: @black-fireproofs @k3nmakyan @m4rt10ne @strawberryy-kiwii @herebereblogs @arieslost @ophcelia @cmleitora @saachiep81 @piceous21 @poppyflower-22 @annie115 @lewlew44 @jexxy04 @gazelle-des-pres @norrisfr @younxii @chezmardybum @russelscherry @allsouls-emma @mickslover @lilymurphy03 (idk why tag lists never fucking work on this stupid site)

♡ Enjoying my content? Support my writing here :)

♡ None of the original writing on this blog may be reproduced, reposted, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.

329 notes · View notes