#as someone who lived in florida it is actual hell

[silent-sanctum]

"Jotaro Kujo is Weak at His Core"

As a writer and avid character psycho-analyzer, I find this concept fascinating because I wholeheartedly agree with what OP has quoted from a "What opinion would get the community to do this? *Insert Johnny getting torn apart*" post.

Before I begin, I know some people will see this, misread it, and immediately say "lmao did we watch the same show? He's strong, badass, and can kick anyone's ass. Like do you know Star Platinum bro?". Trust me, I've seen the replies to this post and they said this same exact thing.

And I'm here to say that to said people, if you truly are not the illiterates I'd like to term you as, you'd take the time to realize that when we say "he's weak", we're not referring to his physical prowess because we know he's one of the strongest characters in the show.

If you don't like to, then you're just proving the accuracy of the last sentence: "You can't stand seeing your edgy badass image of Jotaro as vulnerable."

Pushing that aside, I'd like to expand on OP's opinion/headcanon with some depth to it and explain how exactly he's "weak" outside of being a skilled and strategic fighter.

I've learned that to be holistically healthy, one needs to develop and maintain all optimal functions of oneself: Physical, Emotional, Social, and Mental.

Obviously, Jotaro excels in the physical category. He's conventionally attractive, taller than the average male population, well-defined with a muscled build, fit as hell, street and book smart, and highly in tune with his environment making him adaptable in any circumstance.

He's "strong" in that aspect we all know at a superficial level.

However, we start to see the core problem once we strip this good-hearted man of his physical appeal:

Emotional? He believes he doesn't need to express them to others because why should he. He refuses to process them and instead keeps them behind a locked wall of stoicism and aloofness.

Social? Can't communicate to save his life. He's reclusive and doesn't know how to socialize outside of work. Guarded and skeptical around others. Too much of a workaholic to bother making new acquaintances (if he even knows how) outside of familial connections.

Mental? At 17, he went on a death crusade over Asia and the Middle East, almost died numerous times, and most likely lived with unresolved PTSD that carried over into adulthood, and further deteriorated his already poor social and emotional skills.

What do we have then? If we look past that powerful exterior of a man, we have inappropriate emotional expression, poor socialization, and constant fatigue of dealing with bullshit that relates to his trauma.

And this is what we mean by his "core": His mindset. His inner machinations. The soft spot his enemies would need to target in order to defeat or kill him, strategy-wise.

I. Emotional

We pretty much already know how this man handles emotions. And this may come off as "irrelevant" to the dudebros and the meme riders who believe "haha feelings are for pussies, I advocate for edgy autistic Florida man who don't give a fuck, elopes with dolphins, and berates women".

But believe it or not, he has them, just like any other human being on the planet. I said it once and I'll say it again: Not everyone will wear their heart on their sleeves. Some will convey emotions publicly with no issue, while others would prefer to keep to themselves.

But how does this contribute to him being "weak" at his core?

Essentially, it's similar to how someone with depression may behave (not everyone, some of them). One may appear friendly, sunny, and bubbly to everyone around them, not knowing they're actually suffering from a void that eats them up from the inside when alone.

For his case, it may look like he doesn't care about what happens to him and everyone around him, considering his nonchalant and aloof behavior, but beneath that cold exterior, he cares way too much for his family, friends, and allies. He feels too much to the point where once his allies are endangered, he would sacrifice his well-being without a second thought.

And that's an issue to him.

To him, emotions make him vulnerable and in his circumstance where enemies are actively hunting him down trying to find his weak spots, his emotions should be kept behind doors because he doesn't know how to regulate it on the outside so it's either total stoicism or lashing out.

I found someone saying this line about him that fits him so well: "He's a good person who doesn't know how to be a good person."

This is a man who means well and truly wants to help out of the goodness of his heart, but because of his inability to convey his emotions properly and is unable to pick up emotional cues, it can lead to shit tons of misunderstandings due to inappropriate tone & expression, and that can change how someone views him in the long run, thus leading to unintended deterioration of personal relationships (which contribute to the social aspect of his weakness).

The emotionally-reserved character here with the poor communication skills is the girl. She's a CEO who just received a call, came out from work, and meets with her husband, asking him to accompany her to a doctor's appointment.

I found a visual representation of what I just said above. Just to give context: The show is about a married couple who struggles to keep their relationship afloat, having to navigate through family politics, work & life balance, and miscommunications so they could find why they loved each other in the first place.

Observe how she thinks she views herself VS how others actually view her as.

Other's POV: Demanding, brash, and insensitive Her POV: Anxious, hesitant, and confused

Now remember what Araki had written about Jotaro? "He doesn't believe he must reveal his emotions to others because he thinks everyone can figure him out, leading him to be a victim of misunderstandings. Others think him to be cold-hearted, rebellious, and insensitive."

II. Social

With emotions as our base foundation to poor communication skills, this leads us to his weak socialization aspect.

In a recent quote reblog about how he was raised as a child may have contributed to his tough persona, I mentioned something about his need of "Security".

Growing up, it was mostly just him and his sweet pacifist mother Holly. Joseph couldn't have visited often (he hates Japan) and his dad is a busy musician with a packed schedule on tour. As a kid up to early adolescence, he was coddled by his mother and raised as a good student. Everything was going great for him.

[In popular headcanon] Once he passed puberty, the change to his Part 3 MC era began. People began picking fights with him and bullying him, and he began to see the world as a threat to his safety. Knowing his mother, he wouldn't rely on her to defend him against these dangers. She was too kind, too friendly, too loving for her to deal with the harsh life he now has to deal with.

So he had to be the stronger one for both of them. He already had the physical attributes for it, so why not use it to his advantage?

He got on the popular delinquent trend back in 80's Japan, integrated a couple of cool masculine-esque personalities as his own from his favorite Western and Crime media, and is then able to project this menacing aura everyone should be afraid of, to ward potential threats away from him and his mother.

But Mijin, how does this make him weak? What does this have to do with his need for security?

Think about it: The poor guy's already introverted, doesn't feel comfortable with his emotions that he can't express properly, and now he has to be skeptical with people around him because he realized how shitty society can be, which leads to intimidation that wards off not only potential foes but potential friends as well, making it look like he's anti-social.

On the outside, people are likely to think that he likes being this way when in reality, he seeks a reliable support system on which he can lean onto. Everyone with a sound mind wants that subconsciously because we are social creatures. It's part of our nature.

He's constantly fearful of his surroundings, growing even more vigilant as he ages, but he doesn't look afraid because he chooses to put on a brave face to challenge said fears instead of acknowledging he's scared. I read somewhere in an ask that's not mine that in the manga, some panels actually depict Jotaro shaking/trembling in a mix of fear and adrenaline during some of his fights.

He wants to be around people who he can trust. People who he can lower his defenses with. People who are capable of protecting him just as he is capable of protecting them. People who can face his intimidating aura and challenge it to stand on equal grounds with him or to remind him of his place when he goes too far with certain things. Hence, why he seems comfortable being with the Crusaders.

For once, he wants to feel safe.

To not feel like he has to be this strong pillar of hope that everyone depends on.

To be someone being protected, instead of the other way around where he was always the strong protector. He wants a life of normalcy where he can just be a marine biologist and a professor with a loving family he can come home to.

But that can't happen. The inner circle of friends he counted on is either dead or far away, leaving him even more fearful of the world around him. This results in even more guarded skepticism, always watchful of who's an enemy Stand user and what their Stand could do. Because of his cautious nature, this leads to minimized socialization with others.

With little to no solid support system he can count on, he has no one he feels completely secure with because he believes danger will always come to hurt and/or kill those near him. He doesn't want to burden others with the issues & responsibilities of dealing with Stand users. He wants them to live the normal life he could no longer have.

He doesn't trust in the capabilities of his loved ones when it comes to defending themselves against the amount of potential threats and dangers he has faced, and yet he cares about them dearly. So, he commits to what seems to be the most practical solution in his mind: Self-Isolation.

To be a distant beacon where danger is attracted to and away from those dear to him.

(As we see in the beginning of Part 3 where he willingly locks himself in jail as soon as he sees himself as the threat, and in Part 6 where he stays away from his family once he realizes his enemies were targeting him).

"Your family is your weakness."

All this leads him to become what Araki always envisioned him to be: A lone hero.

III. Mental

Now onto the last part, this part of the essay will focus more on the popular headcanon the community has made about him: "Jotaro has PTSD."

Considering what he's been through at only 17, it would be no surprise that he'd acquired major trauma after those 50 days. Think about it- he gets injured more times than he can count, almost dies numerous times, sees his grandfather get "killed" in front of him, and all this combined with the constant reminder that his mother's life is also on a time limit. A failure to kill DIO meant a failure to save Holly.

The amount of pressure and risk he had to endure for her (and there will still be people who adamantly believe that he hated Holly because he said "bitch" to her twice in the first two episodes).

Now, remember when I said about him having this mentality of over-independence when dealing with stressors? It was still manageable during Stardust Crusaders, but because of what had transpired in Cairo, that mindset carries on to the rest of his adulthood, more so if we consider that he most likely didn't get any therapy or treatment for his trauma.

It might be normal for a teenager to hold onto this stubborn notion of "I can do this by myself" and it's all casual, but with trauma now involved, that notion warps into a persisting belief of "by doing this myself, no one else will get hurt" (i.e. refusing help, doing solo fieldwork, self-isolation).

But Mijin, you keep saying "mentality" this, "mindset" that. What are you talking about?

There's an old Tumblr post I found that talks specifically about this in great detail, but to put it shortly: Jotaro has always wanted to do things by himself because he believes that not only will the task be done with, there would be no one else involved with it, making it better for him to cope mentally if ever shit hits the fan (tying back to poor emotional expression and insecurity in bonds).

If any injuries were to be inflicted, he would be the one to receive them, and he alone, because who knows how he'll react and/or cope when his allies are harmed instead of him over and over again? (refer to the trauma of Jotaro surviving Cairo while the majority of the team that went with him died a.k.a "survivor's guilt")

(Also, refer to how he had exhibited great distress when Jolyne was about to be struck by a rain of knives that Pucci sent)

This might also be the reason why he's more self-sacrificial as an adult: Will be the bait during the rat episode instead of Josuke, takes the brunt of Sheer Heart Attack's explosion to spare Koichi, dives straight onto a path of bullets to save Jolyne, etc.

The only possible solution so he could snap out of that belief he holds on to is that strong, reliable support system he internally needs. People who can help him without sustaining fatal injuries in the process [social]. People who he can approach to release any pent-up frustrations and inner conflicts [emotional].

If he had found those people, then he might have been able to deal and/or cope with his trauma better instead of letting it linger and change his outlook in life [mental].

But we all know how his life went in canon. One moment he's a kid playing ball with his mother, then in his last, he dies by having his head bisected by a time-altering Stand.

Jotaro is a person with a gold heart and a rough exterior. Someone who wants to help and protect his loved ones from the unpredictability of the world the best that he can. But even then, his best wasn't enough. His fear was masked with an air of strength and capability, perhaps as compensation for everything else he lacked:

Adequate processing of emotions.

Stable connection with familial, platonic, and romantic bonds.

A sound mindset that stems from effective coping for his PTSD.

We could only hope in headcanon land that he had a better chance at life in the Ireneverse where he finally could develop his inner core better and get that long-deserved break he had always wanted.

[willowycreature]

that rat bastard had her locked up in florida omg

[greenglowinspooks]

Ok guys consider this: DP fic where Danny and Wes run away together

Make no mistake, they still absolutely HATE each other. Wes has been trying to expose Danny’s identity since the beginning, and that hasn’t changed a bit since the GiW appeared.

Now, though, it makes a little bit more sense to Danny.

Wes is at his window, panting and shaking, and he is bleeding. The GiW, he explains, had been harassing him since the beginning. An hour ago, they got the warrant needed to take him into custody, and they went after him immediately. To add to that, they got the papers to go after one other person as well. Danny.

So now, they’re on the world’s worst road trip to Florida or Alaska or some other, equally far away state because Wes has an uncle there who he knows has a deep enough grudge against the government that he won’t sell them out for anything.

They hate each other, and desperately wish they could ditch each other, but Danny’s the only one who can actually keep their rustbucket bike (originally Wes’ brother’s, gifted to him after it started breaking down) working without dropping at least 2 grand on repairs, and Wes is the only one with a driver’s license.

Danny’s honestly surprised that Wes didn’t just sell him out. Wes told him that, quite frankly, he probably would have, had the GiW not attacked him as viciously as they did. He still hated Danny, of course, but he couldn’t live with himself if he just…left someone to get tortured like that.

Danny snaps that he knew the GiW would do that since the beginning, and if Wes had just listened to him—

In truth, he’s surprisingly touched. He’s never gonna tell Wes that, but still.

Basically just roadtrip of hell where Danny and Wes slowly get closer and start to understand each other, while simultaneously Jazz and Sam are working together to politically destroy the GiW, Tucker is running digital interference as much as possible (Danny, please stop showing your full face in front of security cameras, are you trying to give him a seizure), and the parents Fenton are beginning to think that they might’ve, just maybe, made a slight mistake in their understanding of Phantom.

[heyftinally]

Y'all are going to like this one.

SWIFTIES DON'T TOUCH THIS POST WITH A TEN FOOT POLE, I SWEAR TO FUCKING HELL-

So my friend sent me this article, and I'm going to tell you why I think it's complete bullshit.

1) wishing us a happy Pride month is the BARE MINIMUM. As someone with her presence in the media and social influence, she could - and should - be doing SO much more than just wishing us a happy pride four days in.

2) "the singer has been an advocate for the LGBTQ+ community" not a good one. She seems to only remember us when it's convenient or benefits her in some way. Case in point:

2018 - "When it comes to feelings and when it comes to love and searching for someone to spend your whole life with. It's all just really really delicate. You know?" Taylor then performed her song "Delicate."

2023 - It’s painful for everyone, every ally, every loved one, every person in these communities.

In the first example, the intentional song reference comes off as extremely tacky. This is people's LIVES you're talking about. People are MURDERED for who they are and who they love (or don't love). This isn't an appropriate time to pull out the "oh-so-quirky" act and be cutesy.

In the second, the fact that she can't even center queer people in their own experience is so, SO telling. I promise, however painful it is for allies, it's 1000x worse for us to LIVE it. Allies don't have to wonder "am I going to get hate crimed wearing this?" before they leave the house - we frequently do. To not acknowledge that shows me that everything she says is performative at best.

3) I wouldn't call what she does "advocacy". She mentions us every now and then when it's convenient for her, profits off of us when we fit her marketing plan, and I've yet to find where she actually apologized for the homophobia in the original version of Picture to Burn. Also, she's real good friends with Travis Kelce's dad, who is a raging transphobe (and I bet his kids are, too). You don't get to call yourself an ally if you willingly allow the people around you to be violent bigots.

4) "always" is a strong word for someone who seems to show her support situationally at best. The full quote was "The way for that to happen is for us to continue to keep pushing governments to put protections in place for members of the LGBTQ community. And I promise to always advocate for that." Yet she doesn't do that.

5) what she speaks out, I've noticed that it's nearly always in the states that primarily agree with her. We don't see a whole lot of her "inspiring ally" speeches in places like Texas or Florida. But I've seen plenty of them come out of already notoriously queer-friendly places. If you aren't willing to face the heat of the difficult places along with the comfort of the easy ones, you don't get to call yourself an ally. Allyship is not easy. Anyone remember when Lady Gaga advocated for us in Russia, under threat of arrest, and her response was "arrest me, Russia! I don't give a fuck!"? Yeah, I've never seen even half that level of true commitment from Taylor.

6) STOP. MAKING. STRAIGHT GIRL SONGS. "GAY ANTHEMS"!!!! FFS it's such a slap in the fucking face of REAL, ACTUALLY QUEER ARTISTS that y'all keep calling these piss pathetic straight girl over produced crap songs "anthems". Fucking stop it. If they aren't queer, they don't qualify to be a queer anthem or icon. Start supporting ACTUAL queer artists with ⅛ this energy, for the love of FUCK. This bullshit pisses me off. Do you need a list of queer artists? I'll make you one by hand if you promise to stop trying to label Raylor Swift's straight girl shit songs as "gay anthems".

7) rainbows and gender subversion are not exclusively nor inherently queer. If that's our bar for "gay anthems", the bar is so low Lucifer himself needs a damn Webb Telescope to just barely see it from hell.

[pimosworld]

The ties that bind

Pairing- Dave York x f!reader x Francisco Morales

Series Summary-Dave is a private investigator who tracks down soulmates. He’s tasked to find Frankie’s, but what happens when he finds you and he wants you to himself?

CW-18+,MDNI, Angst,Fluff,Eventual Smut,Hurt, Comfort,MMF dynamics. General warnings for each chapter. Anything sensitive will be added to individual chapters.

WK-5.5K

A/N-This starts out angsty but I don’t write sad endings so keep that in mind going forward. Reader has a best friend very near and dear to my heart.

[Series Masterlist][Main Masterlist]

Not beta read

Chapter I

Dave looks over the file on his desk again before he makes the call. He reviewed it the night before and was going to contact the client until he realized not everyone holds the same weird hours as he does. Insomnia. 

  He takes a sip of his coffee as he dials the number with a Florida area code. At least he would get to enjoy some nice weather this time. The last soulmate he tracked down mid winter lived in Buffalo New York, he wasted weeks trying to find him only to find out he was happily married and had no intention of leaving his current wife. The woman who hired him was devastated but…devastated doesn’t pay the bills so she was out twenty grand, and went back to being single a few states over. 

  They don’t always end in misery but he’s used to it now. He wonders why he still does it, maybe helping these people will erase the thought of killing someone’s soulmate when he’s contracted for his other job. He can’t think about that one too much. 

  “Hello Santiago speaking.” Dave glances down at the file once more to be sure. 

  “Ugh yes I’m Dave York calling to reach Francisco Morales?” He hears a low curse on the other end and some apologies. 

  “Oh ya, just give me a second.” He can hear ruffling and the sound of a sliding door. My patience is already wearing thin. 

  “Thanks for returning my call. I’m actually hiring you on behalf of my friend Francisco.” 

  This wouldn’t be the first time he was contracted to find someone’s soulmate because some friend or family member couldn’t keep their nose where it belonged. There would most certainly be drama and resistance. Two things Dave did not handle well. 

  “That’s very generous of you. Is Francisco eager to find his soulmate?” 

  “He ugh…well…yes, yes he is.” Fat chance

  “I would need to meet him of course to go through with this, you understand?” 

  “Of course, that won’t be a problem at all. I sent you the details of when and where we can meet and provided you with the deposit.” At least he means business, either way Dave doesn’t care about the in’s and outs of why people do it. He knows it’s important… or at least he did. 

  He finishes going over the rules with Santiago that will hopefully get relaid to Frankie. He’ll find your soulmate and set up a meeting. If the person does not wish to pursue the relationship he will relay that to you to avoid any in person embarrassment. No stalking or harassment involved. If he can’t find them within 30 days you get your money back. 

  Some people frowned upon what he did. Purists thought you should meet your soulmate organically. They were rarely alone for more than a few years before they found theirs so he didn’t like listening to what they had to say. 

  He wasted years trying to find his love. When he did find her…it was already too late. Those six months were the best and worst of his life. Knowing he’s found his soulmate and gets to spend every waking moment with her only to have it ripped from his grasp. 

  If he had to spend the rest of his tortured life helping others not waste time then he would. 

  ****

  Why the hell did Will make them wear bow ties? This must be Amanda’s suggestion, there’s no way he decided they should all be this uncomfortable on his wedding day. 

  Frankie looks over at Ben and Will having some brotherly talk as if the younger miller has some wise words of advice having been married for all of six months. He loved rubbing it in that he was able to tie the knot before the rest of them of course excluding Tom who got married years ago when they were all in basic. 

  He tries really hard not to be bitter on these days but he can’t help himself. Of course he ran that risk when he married someone who was not his soulmate. He loved Sophia so much it didn’t matter to him. It’s worked out for plenty of other people and it worked for him…until it didn’t. 

  He didn’t try very hard to find his soulmate. Between being in the military, not being able to put down roots for so long and the fact that his soulmate probably hated him for all his scars and tattoos he can’t say he put much of an effort into finding them. 

  The hummingbird tattoo on his wrist practically taunted him his entire marriage. He pretended he didn’t care and so did she. She always told him they would try for kids when she was ready and he never pushed. He thought she was finally ready when she told him they needed to talk. Never in a million years did he expect her to say she found her soulmate and she was leaving him. 

  Their baby boy should be a year old by now, Sophia was pregnant within a month of the divorce being finalized. This was information Santiago insisted despite the others protests that he needed to know so that he could move on. 

  He can’t put the blame all on her. He left for Colombia to bring home money so they could start a family and he came home with nothing but news that her best friend's husband was dead. 

  It must be some kind of fucked up karma that they went back for the money and now he’s alone. If he’s really being honest with himself, he knows they never really loved each other. It was convenient for both of them. Frankie doesn’t like being honest with himself so he'd rather continue on painting her as the villain in his story. 

  “Hermano, you need some help with that tie.” Santiago starts fidgeting before he can even answer no. He slaps his hands away and Santi backs away with his hands up in surrender. 

  “Why are you being so nice?” 

  “I’m always nice.” Frankie scoffs at that. Santiago was never nice unless he wanted something from you. 

  “You picked up my tux, gave me a ride here and now you’re offering to fix my tie?!” He gives him a look and Santi knows it’s only a matter of time. 

  “I have a surprise for you.” He resumes fixing his tie despite Frankie’s protests. 

  “The last time you surprised me someone died.” Santi clears his throat but doesn’t protest, it must be bad. 

  “I hired a PI to find your soulmate.” That last part is rushed out but Frankie hears him clear as day. 

  He shoves him back a few steps which draws the attention of Ben and Will. “Why the fuck would you do that?” 

  “Chill out Fish, what’s your problem?” Ben steps between the two of them as Frankie looks as though he could spit fire. 

  “I told him about the PI.” Ben whips around to Santi. 

  “I thought we were gonna wait until tomorrow.” Frankie looks over at Will in disbelief. 

  “You fucking knew about this?” He can see it in their eyes and how no one will look at him directly.

  “Can we please talk about this tomorrow? I’m getting married in an hour.” 

  Sure he’ll talk tomorrow, they can all talk about staying out of his life and meddling in his business. Pope can call off the PI and they can all go back to being happy with their soulmates and Santiago can go fuck off somewhere in another country as he always does, leaving Frankie to mope alone with his thoughts. 

  “Ya we’ll talk tomorrow.” Ben comes over to fix his tie and Frankie clenches his fists at his side. 

  This is going to be a long day. 

  ****

  The new Mr.& Mrs. Miller do look very in love on the dance floor as Frankie enjoys his second piece of cake. Cake never betrayed him…his ex wife and his best friends maybe but never cake. 

  Ben dips his wife and it sorely reminds him of his wedding day when he and Sophia ended up with calloused feet from dancing all night. 

  His chest tightens at the sight of Molly dancing with her girls. She stayed so strong through it all and she looks so happy, maybe it’s just a front or maybe she’s choosing not to be a miserable sap like him. She lost her soulmate and never once judged them for what they did. She knew how Tom could be. Frankie doesn’t know how someone could treat their soulmate the way Tom treated Molly. He’s better off alone than with a soulmate who doesn’t love him back. 

  Santiago makes his way over to the table and gestures to the seat next to Frankie. He nods his head for him to sit down while he watches the dance floor. They sit in silence for a moment and Frankie thinks about how selfish he is for being so petulant about the whole thing. 

  Santiago never cared about finding his soulmate, maybe because of their line of work or maybe it was the nature of his being. He’ll never forget the look on his face when his tattoo’s disappeared. He told the guys it was fine but they could hear him trying to muffle his cries in his bunk. 

  “I’ll do it Pope.” Santiago looks at him with a mixture of shock and excitement. 

  “I came ready for an argument.” He slides Frankie’s plate closer to him to steal a bite of cake. “We meet him tomorrow.” 

  “Jesus what if I said no?” Frankie slides the plate back to himself, not ready to let go of his precious dessert. 

  “You might want to lay off the cake if you’re going to meet your soulmate soon.” Frankie flips him off as Santi grabs the plate and saunters off to the dance floor. 

  ****

  Dave’s always early to meet a client, but never this early. He couldn’t find a lot of information on Francisco Morales but he did find out he was Delta Force and so was the man that hired him on his behalf. He always met potential clients in a public place of their choosing to get an idea of who they are. There's no doubt in his mind that this coffee shop holds no significance to the two men and will most certainly not help him figure out anything about Francisco. 

  He knows it’s their military training that they will never seem to break free from. It doesn’t make it easy for your soulmate to find you when you're as mysterious as Francisco Morales. No social media, no parking tickets, no convictions. A minor hiccup with his pilot's license but his record was scrubbed clean a few years ago. It takes a lot of money to completely wipe your record. 

  Their trip to Colombia wasn’t as off the books as they thought. With Dave’s connections he can find out a lot more about the average person than they think. It’s true he is paid to find your soulmate but he has a duty to uphold to not put said person in harm's way. Frankie’s sketchy past and interesting finances make him a little wary to just introduce him to the person he’s supposed to spend the rest of his life with. He doesn’t know the circumstances behind his wife leaving him and that also has his guard up. Who just up and leaves after 8 years? 

  He pauses his thoughts momentarily as he notices an old Jeep pull into the parking lot of the cafe. He hasn’t seen a Jeep like that in years. His suspicions are correct when two men around his age step out. Still relatively in military shape, the shorter of the two in a black t-shirt much too tight for him and black jeans. The taller one in an open flannel and blue jeans donning a dirty cap and aviators…that must be Francisco. 

  They both survey the area as if it’s their first time here and that confirms his other notion that these men wanted to meet somewhere not near their home. Probably thirty minutes to an hour outside of where they actually live if he would guess. Fifteen minutes early to be safe but still not earlier than him. 

  “I should’ve worn something nicer.” Frankie smooths his hands down the front of his worn flannel as they approach the coffee shop. This was his nice flannel but maybe he could’ve taken an iron to it or something. 

  “Relax hermano, he didn’t bring your soulmate to the meeting.” 

  “You vetted this guy?” Frankie couldn’t find much information on David York, which worried him a little. 

  “As much as I could.” Frankie holds the door open for Santiago as they enter and head straight for the counter. Coffee is much needed after imbibing too much at the wedding. He’s grateful in hindsight that he chose this location just outside of town. 

  “Corner,black suit.” 

  Frankie glances up, hopefully shielded by his sunglasses. “He looks smug.” 

  “Don’t start.” Santi hisses under his breath as he steps up to place their order. “ Two black coffees please.” 

  Best case scenario, this guy finds his soulmate and Frankie can’t even wrap his head around what he would do with that information. It scares him to even think about it. 

  Worst case scenario, Pope is out some money that he didn’t ask him to spend in the first place and he can go back to whatever semblance of a life he was living before all this. 

  Way to be positive Frankie

  ****

  Introductions are awkward to say the least. Frankie and Santi seated at the small cafe table across from Dave who has set a notepad down next to his small coffee. The silence is deafening as he scribbled down a few things after giving them a once over. 

  “So I’m sure you have some questions for me. If you don’t mind holding those until I’ve gone over everything.” He’s not really asking and Frankie already had his hackles up at the grim outlook of the man in front of him. 

  He always hated ‘suits’ . This guy is obviously ex-government and he’s not really sure how someone like him ended up in the line of work of finding someone’s soulmate. Besides the obvious monetary aspect there is a lot of love and emotion involved and the man seated before him doesn’t strike him as the romantic type. 

  “Why did you decide to hire me to find your soulmate?” I didn’t hire you. Frankie looks over at Santiago hoping he’ll help him out a little. 

  “Well ugh…I actually didn’t.” Dave raises his eyebrows at that but lets him continue. “My friend here was kind enough to give me a push in the right direction.” After too many drinks and a lot of talking he reconciled with Santi that this was something he should at least try to pursue. 

  Everything seems pretty straightforward once he starts going over his normal way of doing things. Frankie understands after the initial round of uncomfortable questions that Dave needs to make sure he’s not some weirdo. He opted to return a few peoples initial deposit upon meeting them and not deeming them safe enough or sane enough to track down their soulmate and uproot their lives. 

  Frankie’s thankful he doesn’t pry too much into his reason for divorcing. Dave mostly wanted to make sure that he was not still legally married because he won’t set anyone up for heartbreak. 

  Dave has a thirty day guarantee, if he doesn’t find them in that time frame you get a full refund. Frankie is a little shocked at his confidence. People spend their entire lives trying to find their soulmate and he can somehow guarantee it. 

  “So, now that I’ve gone over all the logistics. Do you have any questions for me?” Frankie looks to Santiago who’s been uncharacteristically quiet throughout this meeting. Maybe out of courtesy for Frankie or perhaps he’s sizing him up. Either way, Frankie really only has one thing he is curious about. 

  “Why do you do it?” 

  Dave takes a sip of his lukewarm coffee. It’s pretty bad if he’s being honest but he needs a moment. He always needs a moment when this question is brought up. It’s usually one of the only questions he hates answering. Truthfully answering would require to let people in ‘strangers’. 

  These same strangers trust him enough to do this so as uncomfortable as it is he provides enough of an answer to suit both parties. 

  “I hate to say that it pays well, but I have to state the obvious.” For the first time during the meeting Frankie can see his hard exterior crack a little. The first time where he seems nervous and unsure of what he’s going to say. 

  “Also…I wish I had met my wife sooner. I may have had more time with her.” 

  Santiago excuses himself from the table. He doesn’t do well with emotions. Frankie knows that probably stung a little. He’s not sure if it’s worse that Santi never got to meet them or if meeting them briefly makes it all that more painful. 

  “I appreciate your honesty Dave.” He sends him a tight lip smile that doesn’t meet the eyes. 

  “If that’s all you have for me I’ll be in touch in the next few days hopefully with an update.” 

  Frankie shakes his hand, a firm handshake he notes to himself. Dave has a nice build, he’s not sure why he makes a note of that as well. 

  Frankie finished the rest of his coffee and headed outside. Santi leans against the back of the Jeep scrolling idly on his phone. He looks up at him but says nothing as they both get in, Frankie in the driver's seat. 

  “I just needed some air.” Santiago looks out the passenger window seemingly fixated on the passing cars. 

  “I know hermano.” He doesn’t need to say anything more. 

  Neither of them speak for a while, too many thoughts on their minds as they ponder the meeting and what all of it means. Seeing Santiago still struggling with losing his soulmate makes Frankie want to give this his all. 

  ****

  Santi can’t shake the thought of Dave doing all this because he didn’t have enough time with his soulmate. At least he got to spend some time with them. He's lied to himself all these years after his tattoos and scars of his soulmate were long gone. This was not about him though, this is about helping his friend move on and be happy. That’s all he wants for them after the chaos he caused in Colombia. He has to make things right for him. Frankie may not see it as his fault but Santiago can’t help but think maybe Sophia would’ve stayed if things hadn’t gone so poorly. 

  Santiago would never know that things started to sour in their relationship long before that Ill fated trip to steal someone else’s money. 

  Frankie was the one who had it all together. A real job he could be proud of , a wife he loved , a house for their future family. Things quickly fell apart for him after they returned and he was no longer the one that they looked to for guidance. 

  Santiago made it his mission to help Frankie get back on his feet after they went back for the money. Frankie got his license back, he bought a home that didn’t remind him of all his memories with his ex wife, now all he needed to do was find love. 

  Santi rubs his hands across his jeans trying to shake himself from the trance. Frankie eyes him cautiously from the driver’s seat. 

  Santiago leans forward to turn the radio down. “So how are you feeling about all this?” 

  “Considering he has a guarantee, a little better than I felt going in.” 

  He doesn't want to get his hopes up too much but he’s starting to get that feeling like things may be taking a turn for the better. 

  Frankie pulls up to Santi’s house and puts the car in park. 

  “I know what you’re gonna say, I’ll be fine I promise and I’ll call you later after I sleep off this hangover.” Frankie smiles at that,Santiago only lets a select few into his world and he won’t push it any further. 

  “I just want to say thanks Pope. This really means a lot.” Santi waves him off and hops out, he knows how much it means but he’s not gonna get any more emotions out of this day. 

  “Love you hermano, this time next year we’ll be planning your wedding.” Santi calls out over his shoulder before he enters his house. Frankie wants to roll his eyes at that but he secretly hopes that he’s right. 

  ****

  “Alicia! We’re gonna be late.” You stand in your bedroom in front of the floor length mirror putting the finishing touches on your makeup. The modest yellow sundress and strappy heels you bought ages ago are finally getting some use. 

  “I can’t decide on what to wear.” You faintly hear her yell from her bedroom. 

  You’re not particularly excited about this singles event she signed you up for but you certainly didn’t want to walk in late and have all eyes on you. She’s your best friend so you agreed to accompany her on one of her many schemes to get you back on the dating scene. 

  You cross the hall to her room and find a mountain of clothes on her bed and more clothes flying out of her closet. 

  “Let me see what you’re wearing.” She emerges from her closet in a slinky black dress to match her long black hair. She was a bombshell in anything she wore so you aren’t sure what the hold up is. 

  “Alicia that looks hot, wear that.” She gives herself a once over in the mirror as she smooths her hands down the front. 

  “You don’t think this is sending the wrong message?” 

  “Babe you said yourself you need to get laid.” You glance down at the time on your phone. “Shit we’re gonna be really late.”

  “You’re right, I did say that. Thanks for talking me off a ledge.” She grabs her phone from the nightstand as you follow her out of the room. 

  “You’re gonna need to pretend my room is yours if you bring someone home though.” You gesture towards the disaster she left on her bed. 

  She turns to you, grabbing your face and kissing your forehead. “Only a true friend would let me defile her bed for the sake of a hookup.”

  You laugh as you shoo her along out the door. “That’s what friends are for.”

  ****

  The bad news, you were indeed late. The good news is no one seems to notice as you both enter the hotel lounge for the event. Everyone is talking and mingling amongst themselves so you and Alicia have an opportunity to grab a drink and settle in. 

  You haven’t been on a proper date in years so she thought this would be a nice way to ease back into things. No pressure or obligations and no awkward first date etiquette. People were just here to simply talk and get to know each other. If you made a connection that was great but if you just didn’t like someone then there were no hard feelings. 

  “Cute guy at twelve o'clock is checking you out.” You try to do a subtle scan of the room as you sip your fruity drink. 

  “Alicia I don’t know what that means…Wait how do you know he wasn’t checking you out?” She steps in front of you to slightly block your view. 

  “He’s in the gray button down on my right .” She half whispers as she attempts a head nod. “Do you see him?” 

  “Oh shit he’s coming over here.” You both do your best worst to act casual as a tall and very attractive…distractingly attractive man walks over. 

  “I do have to say yellow is definitely your color.” 

  “Told you.” Alicia says under her breath as she leaves you at the bar with this stranger. 

  You thank him politely for his compliment and introduce yourself as you try to ignore the lewd gestures your best friend is making with her hands behind his back. Thankfully she’s interrupted by a man with a tap on her shoulder. He’s noticeably not the type she goes for. He’s much too tall for her…she prefers to tower over her love interests ‘it makes me feel powerful’ in her words. 

  Jeff was nice enough as he engaged you in conversation. He mostly droned on about his job in finance and his hobbies, his five year goals and now come to think of it…you didn’t really get a chance to talk about yourself. He excused himself from the conversation when he saw someone he knew in the crowd, leaving you in your comfortable silence once again. 

  Your moment of reprieve is short lived when a woman approaches you. You actually enjoy talking to her and you can tell she’s listening intently. She’s beautiful, funny and smart. Perhaps another time you would be interested but she mentioned she just got out of a long term relationship and you don’t have the energy to be someone’s rebound. You’ve spent years repairing your broken heart and if this is your one attempt at trying to find love again it just wouldn’t be fair to either of you. 

  You still exchanged numbers after she’d said how nice it was to meet you. Your eyes immediately find Alicia’s across the room with a man who could be her grandfather. He doesn’t seem to notice her look of save me etched across her face. You take this moment to tease her a bit, making the same hand motions she did earlier. An older woman looks on in shock when you realize a little too late that you’ve caught the attention of others in the room. 

  After offering an apologetic smile, you gather yourself and join her across the room. 

  “Sorry to interrupt, Alicia, can I borrow you for a moment.”

   She loops her arm in yours pulling you close to her side. “It was nice to meet you Irving.”

  “The pleasure is all mine dear.” He takes her free hand, planting a sloppy wet kiss on the top. You bite your cheek to stifle a laugh as she waves him off. You can feel her eyes on you as you exit the lounge. 

  If looks could kill you’d be a goner. 

  “Irving seemed nice.”

  “Shut up.” 

  You both burst into a fit of giggles as you make it safely to the hotel lobby out of sight of anyone trying to vy for your attention. 

  These were the moments you lived for with your best friend. The reason you were able to get back on your feet when you moved across the country to start your life over. She took you in like a stray cat, no questions asked when you replied to her ad looking for a roommate. You didn’t find out until later on that she didn’t need the money, she just hated living alone. 

  She came from a wealthy family and traveled the world before settling in Naples Florida. She never had a soulmate…it wasn’t out of the ordinary for people to go their entire lives without so much as a mark or tattoo. It makes you wonder if the universe chooses at random or if people are destined for that path. She is such a free spirit it almost makes sense why she can’t be tied down to just one person. Her biggest problem is making sure her current interests aren't only after her for money. 

  “So…what’s the plan for the rest of the evening babe?” You both step out still arm in arm. It’s a beautiful sunset starting just over the tops of the buildings downtown. You could walk down to the beach or drab a drink at another bar. 

  You can feel your dress starting to cling to your back from the humidity and you made a huge mistake wearing heels that weren’t broken in yet. Alicia looks at you and then pulls out her phone to call a car to come get you. “Let’s go home and eat ice cream while we discuss what a train wreck that was.” 

  You let out a sigh of relief as you push back trying to stand on the heels of your feet. “That sounds like a perfect night.” 

  ****

  “At one point he actually took his dentures out to show me.” Alicia buries her head in the pillow as you make a disgusted face. 

  “That’s awful. I’m so sorry.” You’re laughing to the point of a stomach ache. 

  “Ya, you sound really sorry.” She throws the pillow at you on the other end of the couch. “So tell me about the girl. You were talking to her for a while.” She raises one eyebrow at you as she reaches down to the coffee table for the carton of rocky road. 

  “She was nice.” You lean forward grabbing the carton from her hands. “She was more than nice actually…but she just got out of a serious relationship.” 

  “Ugh…no one wants to be a rebound.” 

  Your thoughts exactly. 

  You swear sometimes you share a brain, or maybe you have just spent so much time with each other that you can’t help but think alike. 

  “I’m glad we went, I needed to break the ice. It’s not like the love of my life is gonna waltz into the record store.” You loved your job, you always had a love for music. There was something so special about the medium of records standing the test of time. That’s the kind of love you wanted. 

  “Let’s just marry each other if this dating thing doesn’t work out.” She holds out her pinky as you wrap yours around hers. 

  “Deal.” 

  “Deal.” 

  You raise from the couch gathering your plush blankets. “I’m gonna turn in for the night, love you leesh.” 

  “Love you too hon’, get some sleep.”

  ****

  Sleep

  That was a joke in its own right. The problem with having anxiety is the one time where your brain should quiet down is when it wants to be the most active. 

  You brush your thumb along the etched roses on your ring finger. It’s such a fine and delicate tattoo, the line work is beautiful and the stem of it perfectly curls around coming to a point at the end of your finger. 

  You hate to assume, but it’s always felt feminine in nature. It doesn’t seem like a drunken mistake or a rushed decision. The tattoo feels intentional. You had a lot of tattoos in a short amount of time when you were in college. These tattoos were overtly masculine. A small Blackhawk tattoo on your left wrist, almost mirroring your hummingbird. A gun of some kind on your left ankle…you weren’t familiar with firearms. A tiny elephant on the inside of your left thigh, by far the most adorable of the set. 

  In short succession they all adorned your body before you graduated from the California Institute of the Arts with a minor in arts management and a major in music history. Your step mother always said it was a waste and your father couldn’t be bothered to defend you. Your mother would have been proud though. 

  It was years before the roses showed up on your finger one beautiful spring day. It was so unlike the others it turned your world upside down. 

  The reason you moved across the country to escape the control and the pressure of someone who couldn’t love you with those scars and tattoos. Resenting you more and more each day knowing that you belonged to someone else. 

  It’s those thoughts that keep you up at night. The nightmares and horrible things that only your mind thinks up. As much as you try to push those thoughts away, you know deep down someone is out there. Made for you. 

  We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses. 

Comments and reblogs are much appreciated.

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[morganbritton132]

hey! firstly wanted to thank you for this whole eddie munson tik tok saga, it’s seriously brilliant and hilarious and always something i look forward to. i know you’ve said that you weren’t really going to go into detail on the specifics of the world (ie other characters careers and lives etc.) but do you have any vague ideas on where exactly the others ended up? like i saw that you jonathan’s a photographer in a different state, and i know dustin lives close by, and i think you said something about max and lucas still together, but have you got any other information or little headcanons you can share? (like who ended up with who?) feel free to ignore this btw ik it doesn’t exactly fit into the stuff you normally post so no worries if you don’t want to acknowledge it 😂 again, i love this series so much thank you for putting so much time and effort into it!

I actually have talked a bit about what jobs that I think everybody would have in this post!

I left Mike and El out because I haven’t really come across a job that feels right for those two. Someone did suggest once that they thought that a good career for El would be working with child protective services, and I think that’s fitting. I think it makes complete sense that she’d want to help children out of bad situations. My only problem with it is that working for CPS is a very noble profession, but it’s gotta be depressing as hell.

And also, I don’t think that El should have to work.

She saved the world multiple times. I don’t think she should have to participate in the capitalist hellscape that is having a job.

As for where everybody lives and who they’re with:

I don’t know if I’ve ever stated it outright, but Steve and Eddie live in the suburbs outside of Chicago. Everybody lives in or around the Chicago area, except for Jonathan and Argyle who live in California and Erica who lives in Washington DC. People have moved in and out of the state, but currently almost everybody is within driving distance.

Hopper and Joyce still live in Hawkins. Wayne lives in Florida now and stresses the fuck out of Eddie when he refuses to evacuate for hurricanes. Also, Karen divorced Ted and she remarried a wonderful man that loves her and pays attention to her, and supported her when she wanted to go to college.

I take some hard stances on who is together in this, but every other relationship will probably stay vague enough that if disagree, it can ignore it. Definite relationships in the Eddie Munson TikTok Saga: (1) Nancy and Robin are technically married but still refer to each other as their girlfriend or partner, (2) Max and Lucas are married, (3) Jonathan and Argyle are together but not married, (4) Dustin is in an on/off relationship with Suzie that is currently off, and (5) Jeff has a wife and she’s wonderful even though she has never been mentioned.

That leaves Mike, Will, and El up for interpretation (Again).

I pair Mike and Will up as a couple, but I’m honestly not very invested in the relationships of the younger kids (except Max and Lucas) and doubt that I’ll ever explicitly talk about them as a couple in this AU. SO, if you think that Mike and El should be together, I think you can probably interpret any Mike/Will things as them being friends.

Also Erica and Tina are a couple.

[galway-girlatwork]

written for @studioghibelli's writing challenge

Fandom: Narcos

Rating: Mature-There is angst, fluff and smut if you squint really, really hard. 😊

Central Characters: Reader/Pena/Murphy

Central Relationship: Pena/Reader

Word Count: 3,478

AO3

Please do not copy or reblog my work without tagging me

Music inspiration: The Pretty Reckless

SUMMARY:

A tumultuous relationship with a fellow DEA agent, is marked by tension and unspoken feelings. Can a growing affection, mixed with reckless behavior, drugs, death, money and power, really survive? From Bogota, to Miami, to Rome, how far will it go?

A Broken Silence

As the last of the Cali Cartel fell, like little toy soldiers, she wondered what was next. She’d been down in Columbia, longer than she’d lived back in the states. It had taken years of dedication, long fucking days and even longer nights. Elise thought of the hundreds of people that had died, gotten hooked on blow and for what? Power and money. That was the root cause of it all, power and money. She’d been assigned to Columbia a year after she became DEA. They told her she’d be an asset, it turned out to be a load of shit. Women agents were looked at as glorified secretary’s but that was until she met Pena and Murphy. Pena looked at her like a piece of meat, Murphy actually used her intelligence to their advantage. Did she ever actually make it into the field? Yep, as an undercover hooker, Pena’s idea of course. His exact words to her, as she stood there in a slinky red dress was, she had a body, might as well use it. That was the first time she hit him. The second time was when he drunk on whiskey and made a pass at her.

The three of them had been working together for a year before she realized she actually cared about Pena. She’d been sitting in her car, in the parking lot of the embassy when she saw him pull in, a gangly female crawling out of the passenger seat, as he got out, pressing herself against him, her tongue half way down his throat, his hand on her tit. Part of her wanted to vomit, part of her wanted to punch the whore. She knew the woman was a whore, those were the only types of women Pena seemed to be interested in. It was that afternoon, the dynamic of the relationship changed between them because she realized she’d been jealous and the only reason a woman was jealous was because she wanted him. She wanted all of him but knew it would never happen. Her attitude towards him went from indifference to straight up bitch, Murphy snickering every time she went for a kill. By the time Escobar was riddled with bullets, Pena hated her with a passion, which he made clear before he was sent to DC, Murphy back to Florida and she was right back where she started, glorified secretary.

A month later she had been re-assigned, working with some head honcho on the Cali cartel and the intel needed to break up their little surrender deal they had going, cringing inward when a jean clad hip, found the edge of her desk.

“Well, well, seems something is working out for me, how’s is shaken Tanner?” “Are you fucking serious right now Pena? I am working with you? Again? Can someone please tell me who I pissed off in a past life?” “Probably the devil himself hermosa.”

“Don’t, don’t do that.”

“Do what?”

“Come in here thinking I won’t deck you for bein a polla.”

“Whoa, Spanish is improving.” 

“Get the hell off my desk Pena and go find yourself a whore. I’m sure there were slim pickins in D.C.”

“You offering?”

“Vete al infierno.”

“Already there babe.”

Getting off her desk, he went into his office, slamming the door, watching the glass rattle before he threw himself in the chair behind his desk. Fuck, he thought Elise would have been stateside by now, along with Murphy but as luck would have it, she was here to torment him. It was hard seeing her right now, needing to focus on Cali but he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Fuck she was still beautiful and her temper gave her skin a glow that most women he knew would kill for. Closing his eyes, he remembered all the nights he thought of her. Imagining his hands twisted in thick, curly brown hair, looking into eyes so brown, they were almost black, as he slid into her, marking her as his. He not only wanted her but had fallen in love with her. He wasn’t sure when it happened or how but he realized it the day he had been shipped to D.C. thinking his career was over, sitting in an airport bar with Murphy. Murphy knew it and told him to do something about it before it was too late. He’d laughed it off before giving his partner a hug, both of them going their separate ways. Well God had a sense of humor, he thought as he walked in, seeing her sitting there in jeans and a t-shirt, chewing on a pencil as she read the file on her desk. Yea he was so screwed and not in the way that made him want a drink and a smoke.

The next six months were unbearable, her nerves frazzled when it was all over, thrilled when they gave her a month before she was going to her next post in Miami. Just because Cali fell in Columbia didn’t mean the drug trafficking did, since it was still all about power and money. What was that saying, he who dies with the most toys wins? Well, these bastards were gonna make sure they had all the toys and more.

Sitting on a bar stool, surrounded by co-workers, they celebrated with food and drinks, the beer and tequila flowing freely, except for Pena, who leaned more towards whiskey.

“To victory,” Javi toasted, his eyes lingering on Elise longer than necessary.

“To victory,” she echoed, smiling, but there was a wistfulness in her eyes that Javi couldn’t decipher. As the night wore on, one drink led to another to another and before she could stop and form thought, she found herself in Pena’s apartment, passion flaring between them like an arc of lighting. His lips found the base of her throat, suckling at the skin and come morning, it would be a purple blossom of broken blood vessels. Fingers tugged at the buttons of his shirt before she grabbed the sides, yanking as hard as she could, buttons pinging to the floor before they moved to his belt. She wanted him knowing in the morning she’d be gone. One night wouldn’t kill her, right?

Fuck, he thought, as he yanked her t-shirt off her frame, breasts held in place by a wisp of lace, was this really fucking happening right now? Her skin was warm and soft beneath his hands as he undid the button on her jeans, hand sliding into the waistband, his mind focused on one thing, and he almost died right there as he slid his fingers into her depths, feeling how wet she was. God fucking damn he wanted her, laid out in his bed, beneath him, his body marking her as his.

She moaned against his mouth as his fingers slid into her, the pad of his thumb against her clit, every nerve over firing, sending dopamine coursing through her, limbs melting from one feeling to another until they were both naked, not remembering if they had even stopped kissing at this point. He was rough with her, one hand tangled in her hair while the other slid under her knee, teeth nipping at her earlobe. Reaching between them, hand wrapping around the thickness of his cock, she positioned him at her entrance, his name a whisper into the space between them.

That was all it took for his control to snap like a rubber band wound too tight and he slammed into her. He held still for all of thirty seconds before he lost control, hips bucking against her like teenager having sex for the first time. She was warm, wet, tight, her skin sweet on the tip of his tongue as he dragged it across one nipple before moving on to the other, lips attached themselves to the skin of her collar bone, sucking on it, knowing he would mark her there just as he did to the left side of her neck. He knew some thought hickies were tacky but he didn’t give a fuck. When she walked the streets of Columbia, he wanted everyone to know she was taken. He pulled out of her so violently, he wondered if he’d hurt her, but that thought was fleeting as he flipped her over, bringing her to her knees, fingers digging into her hips as he pulled her back, sliding into her with no remorse for the brutality of it. He was feeding his soul with her body and she was allowing it. He exploded violently within her as her orgasm hit, her walls clenching around his hardness made it impossible not to, his name screamed out into the sex filled air surrounding them. Arms wrapped around her, his chest against her back, holding onto her for a moment before he left go, collapsing on his back.

Her body had a mind of its own at this point, falling on her side, facing him, watching as he took in deep gulps of air. He turned to look at her, eyes making contact, it was like they had just seen each other for the first time and there was something so intense in his stare and she felt it within her soul, feeling as if he knew everything about her and still wanted her, wondering if he actually cared, if all the hate fueled words he’d thrown at her, was a façade. She shook her head, displacing those thoughts as she moved over him, wondering how many more times they could lose themselves in the moment before dawn streaked across the sky of Columbia.

He woke up to an empty bed, reaching out, only to find Elise’s side cold. Panic surged through him as he saw a note on the pillow.

*Javi, 

Watch your back. Be safe. 

Elise.*

Fuck, he thought, as his heart sank, crumbling the note and throwing it across the room. He’d never been good with words, especially when it came to expressing feelings. He’d cared for Elise, but kept that buried, not wanting emotions involved because they were a distraction in the dangerous world they’d been living in. But now, that time was up down here, he realized he couldn’t let her go and now he had to find her.

Finding her hadn’t been as easy as he thought it would be. By the time he got cleaned up and to the embassy, he found out that everything was being sent to the field office in Miami, her next assignment. He wasn’t due to leave Bogota for another week. By the time he got to Miami, his nerves were on fire, feeling like he was always just one step behind her. She’d checked in with the field office but twenty-four hours later, she’d gone on vacation and no one knew where, all they could tell him is she wasn’t due back to the office for a month. Where the fuck could she go for a month?

It took him two days and breaking protocol, something he did with ease; to find out she was in Rome. How the fuck was he going to find her there? He’d never been to Rome and no idea where to start. That was when he broke into her new apartment, searching for any clue and found just the name of a museum, Galleria Borghese. What the fuck was he doing, chasing some woman across the fuckin world? This was out of character for him, he was the fuck em, use em, kick em to the curb kind of man but now he was standing at a ticket counter, passport in hand, heading to Italy.

Everything she’d done since she landed were things she did on the fly. There was no rhyme or reason to where she went, how she spent her days, just happy to be away from drugs and death. Don’t get her wrong, she loved her job but Columbia had taken a lot out of her and she needed time to breathe, to find herself again. But her thoughts kept drifting back to Javi. The night they shared had been everything she had ever wanted, and yet, she knew it was impossible. Maybe that was part of the reason she’d come here instead of staying close to home. Maybe she was running and didn’t even know it. Maybe she was just a tad crazy about a man who went through women like he did cigarettes.

She wandered around Rome, trying to take in what was around her from Vatican City, to The Colosseum, every art museum and tonight to the Trevi Fountain. She’d learned that it was best to go at night, the crowds were not as bad and to make sure she threw three coins into to the water. Gelato in hand, she was standing at the edge of the fountain, the white marble still warm from the sun that had beat down on it from the day. Even she had to admit that it was beautiful and again that is when her mind went back to Javi. Fuck, why the hell did she had to be in love with that man? He was more a man of action, not of words. She had seen him break hearts before, and knew she was just another casualty.

The Trevi Fountain loomed ahead, Javi been all over the tourist places and had come up empty. He was frustrated, pissed and was beginning to wonder if he should just go back home and wait however there was one small problem, he was not a patient man, anyone who worked with him could tell ya that much. When he reached the fountain, the third time he’d been there, the coins glinted at the bottom, knowing each one was a wish, a hope and without a coin to toss in, he couldn’t help but think about his own wish, to find Elise. He was too stubborn, refusing to go back and wait. That was when he saw her, sitting at the very edge of the fountain, rubbing fingers over his eyes to make sure it really was her. About fuckin time, he thought, as he watched her throw a single coin over her shoulder. He moved towards her, pushing his way through the crowd, ignoring annoyed mutters and sharp glares of the other tourists he jostled aside. He was less than a foot away from her before he stopped, “What did you wish for?”

Shock couldn’t even begin to describe the look on her face when she saw him standing there, asking what she’d wished for. He looked out of place among the tourists and well everything that Rome was but his eyes were intense, filled with determination, a look she’d seen before when they were in Columbia. “Javi what the fuck are you doing here?”

“I came for you.”

“Why? My assignment in Columbia is over, so is yours so I am a little confused as to again why you’re here.”

Grabbing her hand, he began tugging her away from the fountain, looking for someplace where they could talk, finding a doorway, he pushed her back against the old, faded brick, kissing her, tongue slipping into her mouth, tasting lemon against her lips before he pulled away from her. “Why the fuck did you leave Bogota without saying goodbye?”

“Wait you came all the way to fuckin Italy to ask me that? Are you insane?”

“No. Yes. Fuck. I came here because I didn’t realize until I woke up to an empty bed, a fucking note, and you gone, that I love you.”

“You have lost your mind. Javi please don’t do this because I seriously can’t handle it. I’ve seen you with other women, I’ve seen you use them, hell I’ve seen you break them, and I can’t be just another one in a long line of em.”

“You’re not,” he said. “You’re not just another one of them. Te quiero hermosa.”

“Yea heard you say that a time or two. Look, what happened that night, it was, and this is not to feed your ego, was amazing but I am also not stupid. I can’t take the chance that this is nothing more than a fling and, in the end, the only one picking up the pieces is me as you move on to whoever can give you intel on whatever big bad you’re chasing.”

“God you fucking talk too much.” He kissed her again, hands wrapping in the thickness of her hair, before he nipped his way to her shoulder, teeth and lips, digging into the curve of muscle and sinew, suckling until he heard her gasp, her fingers digging into his hips. The tip of his tongue ran over the red mark on her skin, knowing he marked again, a smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth. “Now every man in Rome will know that you belong to me.”

“I am not a possession Javier Pena.”

“Fuck I didn’t mean it that way. God damn it, Elise. No one is fuckin perfect but I’m standing in the middle of a fucking country I’ve never been to, chasing you around the globe wanting you, no one else, why can’t you see that?”

She stood frozen for a moment, eyes wide with shock, his words hitting her like the tidal wave crashing over her. Taking a deep breath, she slowly let it out, “Because I don’t want to be hurt, can’t you understand that? I’ve been in love with you, all this time and there is a part of me that wants you too, to love all the parts you are. Demanding, possessive, passionate, asshole, dedicated. The risk? Of this? Of believing you want me this much is something I don’t know how to handle.”

“It’s not going to be cut and dry baby. It ain’t like intel where you dissect it all. Just feel it.” He took a deep breath, frustration giving away to relief, stepping closer, eyes locking onto hers. “I get it hermosa, never been down this road before with anyone. Scared shitless that I’ll fuck it up but let’s try to see where this goes.”

Feeling the warmth of his body against her, hearing all the words, let’s be honest, every woman wants to hear, “Okay,” she whispered, voice barely audible. Something in the back of her mind was telling her this was a mistake, of the highest, but fuck it, she thought, because she didn’t want to be that person who turns a hundred and has regrets. Fingers tugged on the belt loops of his jeans, she pulled him closer, tongue tracing the outline of his jugular, skin tangy with the salt of his sweat.

His breath caught as she pulled him closer, feeling her mouth against his throat. “I just want to get away from all of this. Just you and me, away from the crowds, from everything. I want to be alone with you, beneath me. Fuck we need to go now or I am going to take you against this building and we’re getting arrested.”

As dawn began to creep along the city, fingers pinched her nipples as she straddled him, hips rolling in circles, his cock buried deep within her body, he pulled her down to him, lips hard and demanding against hers, devouring her orgasm as his spilled into her depths, her heartbeat erratic against his chest as he wrapped his arms around her.

His name was whispered breathlessly, her voice trembling with the aftermath of their orgasms, feeling his embrace tighten around her, hands now trailing down her back, she pulled back slightly to look into his eyes, a soft smile playing on her lips as she rolled off of his body, laying on her side. “Didn’t get much sleep last night. We should stay in today, order room service.”

Grabbing her wrist, he pulled her towards him, a hand cupping her breast, nipple still erect beneath his palm. “I don’t think I will ever get enough of you hermosa, so I am in agreement with you on that. Te amo.”

“Yo también te quiero, cariño.”

“Getting better with the Spanish.”

“Been practicing.”

Fuck, he thought, hearing his native language fall from her lips, he was in deep with her and it was a realization that hit him with a force of a hurricane, watching her as her eyes drifted closed, breathing steady as she fought staying awake, losing the battle. How the fuck had he fallen for her? He, who had always kept emotions in check, as he whored his way through Bogota, taking down drug cartels, not wanting involvement. Figured he would be scared out of his fucking mind but he wasn’t. The last thought he had before sleep claimed him? How he could get re-assigned to Miami.

[pleasantglitterflower]

The dark side of envy (Joe Burrow x Burrow!sister x Patrick Mahomes)

Tw: envy, hatred, anger, resentment, displays of narcissism and psychopathy

NCAA Championship 2017- Clemsom x Alabama - Tampa, Florida

Janine had just won the college football championship for the Alabama Crimson. It had been a fantastic season for the young wide receiver. She walked towards her parents with the trophy in her hands, all proud, seeing her brother in the middle of the way, all smiles with open arms to welcome her.

-Jan, I can't believe it, I'm so happy for you, you're a champion. - Joe tries to hug her, but she walks right past him, pushing her arm hard against his chest.

-Get out of here, you little shit. - She strode towards her parents.

Joe stood there, embarrassed and not knowing what to do.

-Oh my God, daughter, I'm so proud, you won the college championship. - Her mother shakes her hard, before she and her father give her a triple hug.

-Now that we have a champion, next year we'll all be in the stands, cheering for Joseph. - She just forced a smile at her father's comment.

CURRENT DAYS

A lot has happened between Janine and Joe, her twin brother, but of all these many things, the most important one, without a doubt, was his effort to be with his sister, to show her that he loves her and wants to be part of her life.

Janine, on the other hand, is the kind of person who, when she realizes she is good at something, uses it to bring everyone down to earth.She has become the most poisonous and manipulative person Joe has ever met in his life and she loves being like that, the kind of unbearable person who only shows herself like that when everyone around her is already tied down enough to her and her ego.

Her words at first made him laugh, his mother would say “It’s just her way”, “She loves you”, “You are siblings, she would never hate you”.

But it’s not quite like that.Janine has never been able to see anyone being better than her and when she does, it’s better that that person is someone she really loves.

Like her husband Patrick.

Someone who is hard to overcome, hard to shake, hard to deal with and hard to hate.

She knew she couldn't compete with him, so why not combine business with pleasure?

Mahomes fell in love with her strength, her desire to be the best in everything she does and the way she is with her family.

At least until they get married.

-We finally have someone we can proudly call a quarterback- She boasts, still wearing a veil, with a glass of champagne in her hands, giving her husband a peck on the lips, who laughs awkwardly.

Joe, sitting at the table with his parents, heard it and started laughing, hoping it was just a joke, but it wasn't. Janine hates him.

As the years went by, the annoyance became more and more explicit at family dinners, making birthdays, the rare holidays they could spend together, a living hell for his parents, siblings, nephews, and husband, for everyone except Janine, who enjoys watching her brother with his head down, without the courage to retaliate, because he wouldn't be able to say a single word that he knew would hurt her, out of respect for his sister and love.

Actually, Joe never understood what love in a family is. Some people are easily lovable, while others, like Janine, even though he had more reasons to hate them, just thinking about it made him feel incredibly guilty and his conscience weighed on him. She was his sister and all she had to do was receive her love, no matter how much it cost him.

-You need to listen to this new Kendrick Lamar song, this guy never tires of changing the rap industry- Joe says, ecstatic as always, when the subject is his favorite genre.

-You again with that low-level and derogatory noise, please improve. Although what could I expect from you, right Joseph- His smile died and so did the conversation and smiles at the table.

-Jan please, you are married to a black man, you know better than anyone how important this song is for the whole society, that the lyrics talk about real problems, not stupid love affairs- He tries to keep the conversation going.

-Any John Lennon song already does the job, we are in the 21st century, no one is an idiot- she replied.

Seeing Patrick uncomfortable, she sat down next to him with her plate made, now she would need to disguise the situation.

-But of course if Patrick likes it I respect it, especially because he listens to artists and not gangsters.

They weren't just arguing about music.

-I've been thinking about maybe finishing my studies, maybe changing fields, it might be good for the future- Joe confessed to Jamie, his older brother.

-Joe, you're almost 30, do you really think now is the time to think about that? You wanted to waste your time with these ridiculous courses, you don't even have enough intellect to do anything else- Janine makes the comment. Dan, the middle brother, immediately snorts.

-You talk as if you were a respected journalist, when all you do is spread fake news on social media, what kind of intellect do you have, Janine Burrow? It's because of people like you that others hate journalists. Give us a break, girl- The brother stomped off.

-Far be it from me to be bored enough to judge other people's lives, especially since I have real problems to think about, but it's very interesting how you think that finance is less important than marketing. Don't forget that your beloved husband didn't graduate, but your brother has a master's degree, something that not even you have. - It was Jamie's turn to throw it in her face.

-I think it's better to focus on your problems, Jamie, and go pay your mortgage. - The brother's hatred is visible, from the looks on his face they would easily kill each other right there, in the Burrow family's living room.

But nothing in the world moved Joe more than when she decided to criticize the only thing that Joe was most proud of in the world, not a football trophy or a degree, but his foundation.

A foundation he wanted the whole family to be a part of and help out equally, something that would be something from his family to the others, but someone refused to be a part of it.

-Joseph, I've been thinking, I want to make a photo album for the foundation of all these moments we've spent together and most of all, it would be really cool if we had an annual photo with whoever wanted to participate, to show how many lives we've touched, it would be really cool- Robin focuses partly on the Thanksgiving pie and partly on what the Burrow siblings are doing in the kitchen, to make sure nothing gets out of hand.

-I was thinking about doing some TV commercials with the kids to try to get more visibility and donors. With that, I believe we could extend the donations to the state. I feel really bad about only being able to help our hometown. I even spoke to Jamie and he loved the idea. - Joe explained, trying not to get dirty with all the seasonings he puts in his food.

-It will be really good. We can see which kids feel comfortable speaking out, if their parents allow them to participate, and then we can put it on TV. If the feedback is positive, we can even get support from interested companies. - The older brother explained to Robin, who agreed excitedly.

-Doing charity and advertising? If you want to be seen so much, put a watermelon on your head and go naked in the street. It had to be Joseph's idea. He's trying to buy sainthood. If you show charity to everyone, it's better not to do it. - Janine hurt him in the worst way.

-That way we'll get more donors, more interested people who will help. - He tried to explain.

-I have projects like that and I don't need anyone to know when I make deals with other people, I also don't need anyone to know, I just go there and ask them to see the project and help. You're ridiculous, you only think about fame, did you know that I even have a project with the NFL itself? - She boasts.

The silence in the kitchen takes over.

-I encourage girls to dream and maybe make it to the NFL - she was soon interrupted by Jamie.

-Do you know what your mistake was Robin? Joseph not being Josephine, because she would beat Janine to a pulp - Jamie leaves the plate she is making, going to the sink to wash his hands.

-Or rather, my intellect isn't that bad, it's your fault, dad, because the man is the one who defines sex. Besides, it's your fault that this girl is like this, because you didn't raise her right, you just did everything she told you to do, you two are wimps and now we have to put up with this bitch talking shit - Jamie leaves in a hurry with Jim, his father, calling him. 

-Don't beg me to come back, I'm almost 50 years old, I don't need this shit, I'm going back to my family who are saner - He shouted, leaving the house. 

-Janine, this behavior is unacceptable and you know it - Robin tries to correct her daughter. 

Although Jamie always gets on her case about what she does to Joe, he is her favorite brother and is always around, because for some reason the anger goes away. 

For this very reason, Joe always felt forced to do the same, but for Jamie, who was never offended, it was easy to forgive. 

And when her mother got stressed about the situation and called her to talk and take it easy on Joe, she gives her best acting.

-Joseph has always been the favorite, you always loved him more than me, because I'm a girl, you always celebrated everything he does and never cared about what I do- She opened his mouth and started to cry.

Jim dried her face, which began to burn, and when he felt his chest tighten, seeing his little daughter sad, he quickly went to her and hugged her tightly, while Robin remained firm.

-You know better than anyone that we always did everything equally for both of us. When you won the NCAA, we threw a party and kept Joe hopeful that his ring would arrive, and when he won, we threw a party and kept you hopeful that one day greater victories would come. So swallow your tears, because you have nothing to complain about us, girl, not in that sense, we always did everything equally.

But none of that is enough to stop her.

Patrick discovered a blog years ago, something very common until he was a teenager, where there was always some special subject for the author that it addressed, until it was replaced by long videos on platforms with the same style. But the more time passed, the more he spent with Janine and returned to the blog, the stranger everything became.

Investigating was not enough, she is his wife and knows her well, but he does not have the courage to ask if she had a blog when she was a teenager.At least until the day came to clean the garage, she had to get everything there in time, so why not during the holidays?

He took down the boxes, got ladders and a bench to tidy up the place and take a break from her pink world, it seemed like a good thing.Among the dolls, books, photographs, old telephones studded with crystals, making him laugh at the fashion of the time and also at imagining her at that age, he found an old diary with a broken padlock.

He opened it, imagining that they were drawings, because he himself loved to draw, but showing them to anyone would only be embarrassing. Even among the various scribbled pages, he found some rants about his family, very similar to the ones on the blog, nothing too different from what she talks about every day, so he wasn't too worried.

Until he saw one reference in particular, which left no doubt.

“Just one”

That's what the girl on the blog always said, because according to her, she wished she had been the only one born on that December 10, 1996.

Patrick didn't even blink, everything seemed to stop around him. It couldn't really be her, his wife saying those things about her family on the internet, for everyone to see, as much as he hoped to know that it really is, it's too heavy for him.

She didn't see when he came to her in the living room, she just threw the notebook for her to catch and by the look on her face, she knew exactly what it meant.

-I already know about the shit you did- He said loudly, catching her attention.

-That's good then- She let the notebook fall on the couch and went back to looking at the phone.

-If you still want to live in this house, be my wife and have the slightest bit of my respect, find a way to fix this situation, because if this becomes public, it won't be very good, besides, everything you wrote about them is disgusting and knowing them Janine, I know it's a lie - Mahomes yelled 

-Of course it's a lie, Joseph is too soft, he would never be able to fight back against me, but it made everything much more fun- She couldn't stop laughing.

Patrick stares at her seriously, not believing what he heard, and then she finally sees that he is really angry.

-And what are you talking about me? What did you lie about me to people or, I don't know, on some fake login somewhere? Fix this or this marriage ends here. - His ultimatum came out, leaving her alone in the living room with many worries, but not about feelings or what she did, but about being discovered and what she would do.

She took the diary and threw it in the trash can on the street, calmly returned to her house, not imagining that there would be a photographer there at that moment, wanting to see the facade of the house, after the recent renovation.

Unfortunately for her, he waited for her to come in and stop the movement at the door, to hang on the trash and pick it up, which for him at one moment seemed crazy, soon became true, since when he opened it, he found something too heavy and soon saw the same thing as Patrick.

Patrick was soon asked at the press conference.

Chaos ensued.

The Mahomes family was shocked, since they had no suspicions about this evil and dark side of Janine.

The Burrow family was devastated, due to so much exposure, each one of them was exposed there in an almost indiscreet way, with only their identities hidden.

Anyone who knew Janine and the way she talks about them would know it was her, because she talks about many things that happened, but also invents many others to make herself look poor.

Anyone who only knew the Burrow family would be suspicious, but would never have guessed that Janine would do this.

Joe was seen by Ja'marr, crying in the training center, hiding, afraid of being found, wondering what bad thing he did in his life for his sister to hate him so much.

Yes, hate.

As she herself writes in a post that was rescued, "If I had known that my brother would be so unbearable, I would have found a way to suffocate him with the umbilical cord", and she has often admitted in other posts that she planned different ways to kill Joe, whether by putting poison in his food, trying to asphyxiate him while he was sleeping, or even contacting hardcore serial killers from Athens to order the crime, but according to her, she ended up giving up because she wanted more years to make his life hell.

Joe is devastated, hurt, hurt, sad, it's as if someone had broken both his legs, both his arms and kicked him in the face, no injury and no defeat would hurt more than that.

In another state at the training press conference.

-Janine, what do you have to say about the blog? Do you regret it? Have you apologized to your family and especially to Joe? - A reporter asks.

-I was just a teenager, a child, too immature, it was just a joke, nothing major and they know it. - Her evasive answer and psychotic smile after answering the question shocked everyone. The apathy and coldness in Janine's eyes, and her frightening psychopathic smile put a warning sign in everyone present in that press conference room. They didn't need to be experts in psychology to realize that they were in front of a pathological narcissist with psychopathic traits.

Patrick began to suffer the consequences, as if he himself had created that blog.

-If Patrick doesn't come out and apologize, it will only seem like he is in agreement with all of this and since she is his wife, it is very clear that yes, he is in agreement. How can someone marry someone who doesn't respect their own family? If he didn't know before, now he does. What does she say about him without him knowing? - One of the commentators asked indignantly.

-Exactly, he has to speak up.

-Yes, he does, many sponsors won’t agree with that - another added.

-What scares me the most is that Patrick and Janine have a daughter together, what kind of education is this child receiving? Poor child - another commenter laments

That weighed on Patrick's conscience, the consequences of what he didn't do could arise,that's when he washed his face and made a video tagging the entire Burrow family, except Janine.

'I would like to publicly apologize to everyone in my wife's family.

Above all, I would like to say that I found out about this a few days ago and that I do not condone it, nor have I ever condone it. I have already asked her to do the same and I am waiting for it to happen and, like everyone else, I know very well that this cannot happen at home, it must happen publicly, since she had the courage to expose the family publicly in so many ways, for so many years. I can only regret that this happened. I love each and every one of this family and they are my family, especially you Joe, who shares the same profession and who is so young and talented, you have always had and will always have my respect and affection. You are family to me, you are a brother, I am sorry for those hurtful things you read, things your sister said about you'

The video was finished and posted, Patrick was more than ecstatic with everything he read.

When Janine saw it, she immediately appeared behind him, ready to confront him.

-My video, which I had no obligation to post, is ready, now please, have enough courage, the same courage you had to mistreat your brother, and do the same Janine and personally apologize to your family and Joseph or, if it's better, pack your bags and leave - He ordered, going up the stairs without even looking at her face.

She hugged her brother in a careless way, while he, imagining that she was being truthful, held her tightly, letting the tears wet her shoulder, who soon grimaced without anyone seeing.

-I'm sorry for everything, I was just an immature and idiot, who didn't know what I was saying, you know I love you very much Joe - She said it out loud very easily.

When her brother released her and she thanked him for it, she had to put on a fake expression of sadness, which worked well.

Peace was established between the Burrow’s, at least that's what everyone thought, since now she had other ways to transfer her anger towards Joe, a new diary, and Janine, with her traditional psychopathic smile, started writing again.

[sirfrogsworth]

I have two best friends.

Which is not an apt description.

Best friends is too small a term to describe what they are to me.

Chosen family. Ride or die. People I would drop everything for if they needed me. People I would protect with my last breath. People who know embarrassing details they will take to the grave.

Now that my mom and dad are gone, they are my lifelong companions. I trust them with my life.

I talk about Katrina all the time. But I tend to keep my friendship with Delling a little more private. I don't love either of them any more or less. There is no ranking system for my besties. But Katrina and I are basically like an old school comedy duo, so we have a lot more shenanigans to share. Shenanigans are easy content for a blog.

Delling is disabled like me. We have a lot of the same consequences from our health issues. Extreme fatigue most of all. Delling was unable to get disability benefits though, so they have to work a 9 to 5 job. And it exhausts them to the limit. They often will work and go straight to bed. If it were possible, I would talk to Delling every single day like I do with Katrina, but circumstances don't always allow for that.

So we have less shenanigans, but the same amount of love.

I'm also a little more protective of Delling at the moment. They are trans and for some reason a large portion of the "very online" people have decided to hate my best friend. And sometimes I worry about drawing attention towards Delling from the few trolls who still hate follow me.

Delling is almost always in my thoughts when I write about trans issues or argue with transphobes on Twitter. But I refuse to invoke "I HAVE A TRANS FRIEND" most of the time. For one, I don't advocate for trans people just because I have a trans friend. Though it does make the emotions I feel very intense sometimes. A lot of tears and anger. But I also don't want to sound like those conservatives who justify everything they say because they have a friend from a marginalized group.

There are certainly times people will be like, "Why would you mutilate someone and cut off healthy breasts??" and I wanna be like "Delling is much happier without boobies and I can see a huge difference since their surgery and you don't know what the fuck you are talking about with that mutilation nonsense. FIGHT ME!"

But I don't think I need to announce my bestie's private top surgery details just to win an argument on Twitter.

I'm just really happy for them and I am glad it helped. They struggled to get the surgery for so long and fought like hell to make it happen. People acting like it is this horrible thing make me so angry. When it finally happened it was... a relief. A weight lifted off their shoulders... err... chest.

After my dad died, Katrina was unable to get away from Florida to help me out. She was dealing with her disabled dog, Lucy, and her end-of-life care. That just isn't something you can ask someone else to look after for a few days. So Delling got permission to do remote work and drove down from the top of the country to help me. They came on the weekend of my dad's service and stayed a few days after to help me get the house sorted.

I'm honestly not sure I could have made it through that experience on my own. During the service, Delling just clung to my side as I tried to act normal when long-lost relatives offered similar grief platitudes over and over. And I kept introducing Delling and saying they were from the wrong state for some reason. I do actually know where Delling lives, but I guess my brain was not functioning in that situation.

Delling also helped me finish my eulogy literally hours before I gave it. And they helped me print out a bunch of photos of my dad that almost no one looked at. I'm so glad we spent all morning frantically doing that. *sigh* Though I'm hoping the photos will come in handy when I do an online memorial for my parents, so it was not all for naught.

There was a moment when a certain someone gave an impromptu speech at the end of the service about how she let my dad see his granddaughter for a couple of hours a year ago and how special that was, and Delling tightly squeezed my hand to help channel away my anger.

Ya know, those totally normal *yearly* visits all grandpas get to have.

Sometimes friends just know, ya know?

Delling and I also revamped the kitchen for my needs, which I have already turned into absolute chaos. And we had a fun shopping trip to Sam's where I bought tender beef jerky that was the toughest to chew jerky I've ever experienced. I guess the "tender" on the label was sarcastic.

All I know is that casually shopping with my friend was this beautiful bonding adventure where we just got to hang out and be together. It's weird the experiences that stick with you. Trying to pick out wholesale sushi with my bestie will be a treasured memory for the rest of my days. And I think that is kinda perfect in its simplicity.

There are not enough thank yous in the world for what Delling did for me. I wish they could have stayed a few months instead of a few days. I miss having them here in person. But they had a foster bunny to take care of and a job and a family. So I had to give Delling back to the top of the country.

I just wanted to write this in appreciation of my other best bestie. I love them more than anything. And I can't tell you all how special it feels to have someone who will drop everything, drive across the country (through tornado weather, no less), and keep you company during a very lonely time.

[roguekhajiit]

Conspiracy theory time.

Please note: Not now, nor have I ever been, a hard-core kool-aid drinking conspiracy theorist. I engage in these topics for fun only.

This is one that I have been formulating in my head for the past couple of months. Be warned, it's long.

Trump is staging his own assassination attempts to earn sympathy votes.

PART ONE

Thomas Matthew Crooks was allowed to walk around a Trump rally carrying a gun. He didn't make any attempts to be covert. He was allowed to access the roof of a building that was conveniently left unsecured with a direct line of sight of the former president.

Following the shots, Trump is allowed to stand up and raise his fist in the air, with the American flag conveniently waving behind him for a photo op.

Now, this could have been halfway believable. The photo op is suspicious by itself. But then we have the maga politicians who didn't waste any time taking to social media to lay the blame on democrats and liberals. Your candidate was just shot (supposedly), we didn't even know the shooter's identity yet, and they were already in full gear with the blame game.

Then, in the days following this attempt, every wanna-be private investigator on the internet was digging up his voting and spending history in order to shift the blame onto democrats and liberals. I mean, it couldn't have possibly been an ex Maga cultist who finally took the blindfolds off. He HAD to be a democrat.

Of course, they found some obscure donation on ActBlue that may or may not have been his. And that was all she wrote, folks. He was a bonafide, hard-core, liberal. There's no possibility that someone can switch parties. You just can't do that in American politics. It's not allowed. In fact, it might as well be illegal.

Then, there is Trump's ear situation. He says the bullet hit his ear. He even had that obnoxiously oversized bandage on his ear for a couple of days. But then it was gone. No scar to prove the bullet ever hit him.

Some say that he's a billionaire, and he can afford the best surgery money can buy. But hold up there for a second. If he's a billionaire, why does he need to raise money to pay his court fees? Why does Granny need to withdraw money from her life savings so Trump can pay his attorneys? Shouldn't he just be able to write a check?

Even if he wasn't actually in debt up to his toupee, he's 78. Cosmetic surgery on a 78 year old ear isn't going to be perfect, and it sure as hell would need extra time to heal. Sorry, folks, Trump just doesn't have super healing powers.

PART TWO

Ryan Wesley Routh is a 58 year old ex-con, ex-Trump voter living in Hawaii working as a handyman and bringing in a $3k a month salary.

On September 15th, just 5 days after Trump's disastrous debate against Kamala Harris, Routh is arrested for allegedly attempting to assassinate the former president. He was spotted apparently pointing a rifle through some bushes at Trump's Florida golf course. It was originally estimated that he was 300 to 500 yards away from his target. After being fired upon, he fled in a black Nissan, which a witness was conveniently there to take a picture of, and drove 50 miles before he was pulled over and detained without incident.

At the scene, they found a gopro, two backpacks full of ceramic tiles (what for?) and his rifle.

After the incident, different details were revealed, and many were contradictory.

The incident was immediately classified as an attempted assassination. Reports stated shots were fired, but it wasn't immediately clear if he fired any shots. Later, they would say he didn't even have TFG in his line of sight. Yet, he was reportedly 300 to 500 yards away.

The Sheriff praised the secret service, saying they did everything they were supposed to do. Yet they didn't do a perimeter check of the golf course before TFG started golfing? Just weeks after the previous assassination attempt and subsequent increase in his security details? Shouldn't a perimeter check be included as part of the SOP for protecting a former president?

It is also reported that he made multiple flights between Hawaii and Florida in order to scope out places Trump was known to frequent. On a $3k a month salary.

Now, we get to the blame game. Of course, as with Crooks, maga was quick to label Routh as a democrat. Conveniently enough, they were also apparently able to find donations from him on ActBlue. But not so fast. He voted for Trump in 2016. Isn't it possible that someone can hold bipartisan views? Nope, according to MAGA, if you have a Harris/Walz bumper sticker, you're a terrorist.

PART THREE

Now, just five days after Trump said,

“I’m going to go there in the next two weeks. I’m going to Springfield. You may never see me again, but that’s OK. Got to do what I got to do. ‘Whatever happened to Trump?’ ‘Well, he never got out of Springfield.’"

The government and media are releasing the contents of a letter they claim was written by Routh to the World:

“This was an assassination attempt on Donald Trump but I failed you. I tried my best and gave it all the gumption I could muster. It is up to you now to finish the job; and I will offer $150,000 to whomever can complete the job.”

There are a lot of questions that surround this. Firstly, why release this? This puts a bounty on TFG. Secondly, the person who had the box claimed to hold it for several months, never looking inside. Not once? Thirdly, this means he would have written this months in advance well before Crooks ever fired his first shot. It also means he never planned to succeed. That would make this less of an attempted assassination and more of a suicide mission.

But when we look at Trump's statement 5 days ago, which seemingly predicts his own death, it starts to look like this letter was released intentionally. There was another letter that was found in his possession, but they aren't including it as evidence, nor are they making its contents known. Just the one that puts a $150k bounty on his head. Whose gonna pay? Surely not the guy sitting in jail who was only earning $3k a month.

[sniigura-archive]

i know you and i like you anyway (1)

chapter 2

nathan prescott x reader ; warren graham x reader

summary: when the pressure and eyes are on you, it’s hard to stay afloat. especially when your not so forgotten best friend comes back into your life. and they are ready to mess up the plans others have for you.

having parents and peers constantly nag you about your grades, interests and lack of an significant other can bring you down. but meeting the new kid in the academy can change at least one of your mocking points.

yn is implied to be afab (lives in fem dorms) but is genderneutral otherwise!

tw/cw: mentions of poverty, mental health issues, canon typical violence, swearing, implied/ref drug use, modern au as in its not 2013, huge canon divergence and messed up time line, obsessive behaviour, possessive behaviour, tell me if i missed smth!

read on ao3 for better formatting and tagging

unlike popular belief nathan prescott did not grow up in arcadia bay. the heir to the prescott name grew up in fort lauderale, florida. his family, from his mother side, lived there. she was able to convince his father to let them live there, bless her soul.

(“it will be good for him! for us! the pressure will destroy him. just look at how kristine treats us.. i don’t want to lose another child.”)

he spend his time at prestigious elementary and middle schools. and at middle school is where he meet you. people started quickly talking about you, simply because you were the only scholarship student. unlike everyone else you didn’t come from money.

your uniform was constantly 3 sizes too big, your hand was constantly raised and when you got anything less than an A there was clear panic on your face. the biggest difference to everyone else were your empty eyes and constant deadpan. seemingly nothing truly got a reaction out of you. there was a boy who tried to, by pulling at your hair and messing up your homework.

you beat him up so bad that the whole class just decided to leave you alone. and fact is, everyone who was near you also got left alone, so nathan was naturally pulled towards you. he wanted nothing more than to be left alone.

middle school was hard, simply because nathan`s problems started to really show, he wasn`t a child anymore who threw temper tantrum’s. he was now a boy with violent emotional outbursts. and quite frankly, children are cruel. getting a rise out of the weird prescott kid was more entertaining than torturing their maids and nanny’s.

because you were the only one who could handle his temper, simply because you didn’t care about it as long as he didn’t touch you, you got paired up for different projects.

and that’s how you meet his family. his father didn’t like you, but he doesn’t even like his own children, so his opinion didn’t matter. his mother and sister loved you, simply because you were very polite. dinners were filled with you being questioned to hell and back while you were trying to eat as much as possible.

“uhhh.. i have an older brother, he’s 2 years older than me…i have a twin brother, too. and another 3 little brothers. my father works at a la…actually he’s unemployed right now. my mother works as a teacher and during the summer break she works..where ever they need someone. what i want to be when i grow up?…middle class.”

meeting you after school was hard, responsibilities which nathan couldn’t even imagine carrying were put on your shoulder.

(“sorry. i have to study and babysit. so sorry, i need to grocery shop and take care of dinner. i wish i could, i have to cut the hair of all my brothers and clean the house. if i don’t pass this test my father will murder me.. i have to study. thank you for being so understanding.”)

to be honest, at first nathan didn’t even want anything to do with you. his mother insisted for him to invite you over. he now knows she pitied you. he now knows, too that you even were able to pull on the heartstrings of his father, because he would ask when you would visit again.

when nathan asked you, why did you have to care for everything, what did your brothers do to help? “have fun, i guess.” he felt angry for you. “how can you just roll over and take it? what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“well, who else would do i? why are you angry? i’m not angry, and i’m the one with the responsibilities.”

nathan learned to love you and the emptiness you carried around.

just like everything good in his life, your friendship (or was it more? it felt like more. he misses you, he misses your mean comments, your eye bags and exhaustion.) ended slowly.

once middle school was over, and he was able to graduate with a dirty record of violent outbursts, which was magically clean once he looked over it. the prescott family moved to arcadia bay. he was enrolled in the blackwell academy.

he found this out at the end of the summer break. to be honest he was getting suspicious, because all his questions regarding the highschool he was supposed to attend were being ignored. his father send him away, his mother smiled at him with sadness, he insisted to go to the same school as you.

“please, don’t forget me at your new cool school.”

“i will NEVER forget you, idiot. you’re the only tolerable person i know.”

the way you smiled at him was still clear in his head. you were beautiful in a way he has never seen, and the older he gets the more he realises he never will see anyone quite as pretty as you.

when nathan is 13 he meets dr. jacoby and starts treatment for the anger he feels. he knows that he fells ptity for him. nathan misses you, when he told you about his father, about the bruises and pressure he is under you simply talk about an escape plan. a way you both will be free from the shackles your family put on you and live happily everafter.

maybe you pitied him, but that would never stop you from treating him normally. you didn’t try to avoid his outburst, his meltdowns, you were always direct to him and never lied. he respected you more than anyone. he sees it in his mother, and relatives, how they dance around him as if he is fragile.

when nathan moved away, the first year he visited every break he could. summer, fall, winter and spring spend together. when he wasn’t there with you, he texted you. sending letters, postcards and hour long phone calls. his father hated this, more than anything.

(“depending not only on someone, but on such a low class person? don’t you know that you’re being used? they only see you as a walking wallet! i will put an end to this.”)

the only time dr. jacoby has seen sean prescott in person is when he expressed his concern regarding a codependent friendship with someone from florida. looking back on it, the doctor realised he was lied to and he was able to convince nathan to stop the contact, the only stable and positive influence in his life.

nathan wishes he could say that he got back in contact with you, that you were best friends again, but life is cruel and he’s a coward. he misses you, more than anything. he thinks he’s obsessed with you, dreams were about you (both dreams and nightmares), his day was spend imagining what you were up to, what you look like now. the silly thing is, nathan has never told anyone about you. victoria knew that he had an ex best friend in florida, but she didn’t know any details, rachel knew he was hung up on someone, jefferson knew that there was someone inhabiting his heart and mind.

and well. the school knew somethings. see, the thing is, when you’re high some things slip out. sometimes you mumble a name once or thrice when you’re passed out, and when you (try) hooking up with someone, you moan the wrong name. more than once. with different people. yeah. when one person claims he said the wrong name it’s one thing, but three? he was in deep shit.

victorias nosiness didn’t help, she wanted all the gory details, but he couldn’t say anything. what was he supposed to say? i fucked it up with the best person, because i couldn’t stand up to my shitty father and useless psychiatrist? sure. part of him was sure that she saw the pictures of you he has in his drawers, in his albums, hidden away.

for a short time nathan thinks he moved on, when he met rachel. she was pretty, smart and nice. she was less than you and much more. and he thinks he’s ok, ok with the distance and unknown which surrendes you. why did all your social media accounts have to be private?

nathan is 18 and it has been nearly 4 years since he has seen you. blackwell turned into the senior focused art academy, just like it was planned. he entered his first year in the 2 year programme and finally he was able to make a name for himself. victoria turned the vortex club into a group for the elite just like how she planned, with nathan’s help. he wasn’t the victim anymore, he finally ruled over the school grounds. summer passed and before he could register it, it was fall break.

it was the last few days and students started to move back into their dorms. the talk right now where the new students attending, some students dropped out because they were catched with drugs on their person, some couldn’t afford the rising tuition prices and others simply moved away because of their parents. nathan couldn’t careless, those who left aren’t close to him, but who is truly close to the prescott heir? he can’t lie though, he lost one of his best customers, or more like frank did.

victoria was in nathan’s dorm room, she was checking out the new student’s. according to her, there were no new people in the girl dorm’s who fit in the vortex club. how tragic. outside on the hallway was some commotion,

“please, move and unlock your door before i decide against helping you with your furniture.” could be heard from the outside, spoken by an unknown voice. the room besides nathan was being occupied. sad. he will miss the privacy and silence. especially now, with furniture being build. fucking hell.

“oh my, hottie alert. two of them even.” victoria was peeking out of his door.

“oh yeah? found some new members?” she hummed, “let’s go over and introduce ourselves. first impressions are everything. before the freaks come and snatch `em away.”

nathan groaned, “give me a minute. i’m still fucking hangover from yesterday. fuck, frank needs to stop stretching his shit or one day i’m going to die, for real.” victoria only chuckled at her best friend.

stepping away from the door she got out here phone and looked herself over in the camera, fixing a few strands and wiping away lipstick which started to smear over her lips. in the meantime nathan got up from his bed, going through his har with his hands and putting on his iconic jacket. with that he left the room, victoria right behind him. looking his door before they make their way over to his new neighbours.

and honestly, he should have expected this, because you always meet someone twice. or that’s what you always said. the door was open, and some guy had his back turned towards them. damn, he’s tall. it’s kinda overkill. turning around, the stranger nearly ran into him and victoria,

“shit! my bad, i didn’t see you there…do we know each other?”

you weren’t who nathan saw when he found out you were back, or more like you were here. in his life. instead, he saw face to face with your twin. the guy was freakishly tall, nathan remembered how small he used to be, now he was over 6 feet tall with clear defined muscles.

nathan with his proud 5`7 feet felt his fragile ego being tested, simply by the fact that some guy he used to know when he was, like, 13 was now way taller than him. and part of him wants to lash out, yell at oliver for not watching where he’s fucking going. but nathan was aware that this would kill any chance of reconciling with you. starting a fight with your brother would immediately put him on your shitlist, even if you hate oliver. sometimes.

(“he’s still my brother. if you talk badly about him again, i’m going to throw you out of this window.”)

“jesus himself could stand before you and you wouldn’t recognise him. stop bothering people, this is the third time you have asked someone this. get your stuff already.” your clearly annoyed voice rang through the room. thankfully this took away n

oliver scratched his head, “man, not my fault i can’t recognise faces for shit. my name’s oliver. nice to meet you guys!”

victoria the angel (or devil) took over the conversation, noticing that nathan was a tiny bit overwhelmed, “hi! i’m victoria and this is my best friend nathan. we just wanted to welcome you to blackwell. if you need any help don’t be afraid to ask us.” she put on her best mask of friendliness. “we are the leaders of the vortex cub, a group for blackwells elite. i’m sure you will fit right in.” taking out a flyer she gave it to him.

reading it over oliver said, “me? for sure. i don’t know about grumpy bear back there.”

“what’s that supposed to mean?”

“you’re my twin, and i love you but you’re mean. like, even teachers are afraid of you. well, i better get going before you throw something at me.” with that oliver left his spot at the door and nathan finally can look at you. you were sitting in the middle of the room, an unfinished shelf laying on the floor and a toolbox was at your side. in one hand you held a screwdriver and in the other hand, raised into the air you held a pillow, obviously ready to throw it.

you look just like he remembered and at the same time it feels like he’s looking at a stranger. you’re not quite as skinny anymore and your eye bags weren’t as dark anymore. wearing a oversized hoodie and jeans, just like when you were a kid. but now he knows it’s probably more a fashion choice instead of only owning hand me downs and extra big clothes to grow into. of course, you still have to be stupidly attractive. now you wear glasses, too.

you lowered the pillow back to the ground, now that your target left. looking down at the shelf you pouted and said in a small voice, “i’m not mean.” your piercing gaze drifted over to victoria and then nathan, “hi, i’m the mean y/n, apparently.” when you saw him, you did a small double take. victoria and her awareness immediately caught that. stupid artists and their eye for details, especially since she has heard that name mumbled many times.

“oh? where are you guys from?” she asked, smiling at you.

“uhh…florida,” when you saw her raise a brow, hinting at waiting more details you continued, “fort lauderdale, to be exact.”

“what a coincidence! nathan here also grew up there. do you perhaps know each other?” the way victoria smiled reminded you of a dog barring it’s teeth in a warning.

nathan knew you and you would play along with whatever lie he went with, but part of him doesn’t want to lie. here’s his chance to actually start a path, to be friends again (or to be more. but you probably hate him, on the other hand who doesn’t?).

“…long fuckin` time no see, y/n.” what a lame way to say hello after nearly 4 years, but it’s not like he can rewind time.

before he could register it he was hit square in the face with the discarded pillow, “what the fuck? what happened to forgive and forget? huh?”

“woah..” only now did nathan register that fucking warren was also in the room, sitting on the bed. the guy was impressed, he never thought he would see someone attack nathan fucking prescott. warren is putting you on a pedestal right now.

“what the fuck are you looking at, loser?” in true nathan fashion he had to lash out at someone and it couldn’t be you. warren quickly put his hands up in surrender, regretting ever speaking.

“no fighting in my room, guys.” oliver returned in his hands two boxes stacked on top of each other. looking at nathan, he said “so i do know you, what kind of unforgivable act did you commit for grumpy to punish you with the pillow of hatred?”

“stop calling me that!”

oliver walked further into the room, dropping his boxes near you and asking you something, in a hushed voice and a language unknown to the others in the room. when you answered his eyes widened in shock.

“the rich kid! of course i remember you, dude. in fact, y/n will forgive you for whatever you did and marry you. so we- you guys can be rich and shit, together.” oliver nodded wisely, while you looked so tired. shaking your head, you simply started to screw around with the screws in the shelf.

quickly dismantling the shelf, you dropped the screws messily on the floor and stood up, pointing to your brother you said, “you’re horrible,” pointing to nathan, “i’m incredibly angry with you,” pointing to both warren and victoria you spoke your last words, “it was nice to meet you both. warren, i will take you up on that offer to show me around.” and then you walked out with the tool box in hand.

“are you finally going to tell the story about y/n?”

“…fuck, i don’t know how to put up any furniture.”

[longlivetv]

me reading your post also living in an extremely red area of florida and nodding harder and harder as i go on: hell yea

Would I prefer to live in a world where everyone was on our side? Of course. Am I glad to now be in a blue state on a blue street? Of course.

But I also need people to understand that people irl who are not chronically online genuinely don’t know a lot of the things we know/believe about the other side. Folks on the other side actually disagree with a lot of things they stand for, if given the opportunity to find out in a non-confrontational way. People are super ignorant, and they’re not learning anything new by only talking to people voting for the same person they are, they’re just getting their views reinforced.

Being friends with someone isn’t an endorsement of their politics, it is finding human connection and that is something that we all need more of. The deep divide between sides will only widen if no one ever builds bridges.

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

~Big spoon, little spoon (+cuddle) headcanons for the Main 6~

=======================================================================

Loui: mainly little spoon

-he is often the victim of being snatched and cuddled closely (I mean- who wouldn’t snatch and cuddle th living f*ck outta him 🥺)

-he is always the little spoon, with only a few exceptions

-the only way this boy is sleeping is if he is with someone else like Florida, Mass, Texas, or Georgia

-he is very, VERY cuddly, especially when he’s sleepy

=======================================================================

Florida: big spoon

-he is always the big spoon, no matter what

-despite his chaotic energy and personality, he really loves being able to hold his loved ones in his arms as if he were protecting them

-he is always very warm, and while he is absolutely jacked, he is strangely comfortable to cuddle with

-he will snatch literally anybody to cuddle at random times of the day. New York just drinking coffee and contemplating on putting a gun barrel in his mouth? Snatched. Loui just simply existing? Snatched. Texas overworking with no break? Snatched. Gov nonstop working? Snatched.

=======================================================================

Cali: big spoon

-mans is always the big spoon

-he is like Florida, warm and jacked, but comfy

-York usually ends up being his cuddle victim cuz he knows that Yorkie is beyond touch-starved

-during that one winter where Texas and Loui both froze over, Cali and Florida snatched both of them and cuddled them since Flo and Cali were both warm.

=======================================================================

Texas: 50/50

-sometimes he’s the big spoon, other times he’s the little spoon

-he loves being big spoon cuz he’s able to hold those he loves close and "guard" them as they sleep

-this man will NEVER, and I mean NEVER, admit that he loves being little spoon and that he loves being held. Tho it is quite obvious that he enjoys it, seeing as he doesn’t fight back or protest against it if somebody manages to pin him down and cuddle/hug him

-has definitely been manhandled and cuddled by Alaska. No doubt about it. And while he grumbled and protested a bit, he secretly did not mind it, and definitely hopes it’ll happen again (and it does)

-Loui has definitely fallen asleep on top of Texas just so Tex wouldn’t move, and Texas won’t move because he has a "secret" soft spot for Loui, and loves being able to hold those he loves.

=======================================================================

Gov/DC: mostly little spoon

-first off, if you’re gonna cuddle this mf, you’re gonna have to go through the struggle of getting his stubborn *$$ away from his work

-he usually ends up being the little spoon and the big spoon at the same time if there’s two people cuddling him "against his will" (usually Florida and Loui, Florida big-spooning Gov and Gov little-spooning Loui)

-because of how sleep deprived he is, if somebody cuddles him, he will fall asleep nearly instantly, but not without some sleepy protests

-gets handed over to Georgia a lot so that he will actually sleep and not just run on coffee

=======================================================================

And finally New York: little spoon

-yes his scrawny 5’10 *$$ is a little spoon and yes he would rather take a swim in Australia’s oceans and walk through hell in full winter gear before admitting it.

-much like Loui, being cuddled is the only way he’s getting any proper sleep whether he would like to admit it or not

-he will fall asleep in the arms of whoever is holding him whilst purring if they end up petting him like a d*mn cat "against his will" (I say "against his will" cuz he could literally make them stop at any moment if he wanted them to, whether it be with a single word or a punch to the family jewels)

-he usually ends up being the cuddle victim of Cali or Florida and Loui, and he "secretly loves it more than life

-when getting cuddled, for the cuddler it’ll be more like having a sleeping cat next to them if York isn’t fully relaxed (as in, he’s curled up in a ball with his arms wrapped around his torso)

[fishfingersalad]

Rvb skating hcs, bc I miss skating but I can’t figure out how to put the brake back on my blades, and where I live is rlly hilly so I need it or else I'm trapped in the cul-de-sac.

Putting a break cause its a real long list lol

Skateboards:

Alpha Church (Can’t actually skateboard, swears he can but he's sooo wobbly) Tex (Can actually skateboard, makes fun of church) Tucker (Between Church and Tex’s levels, hes decent at it) Wash (Don’t think I need to explain this one) Niner (I’ve seen a lot of wheelchair niner hcs, shed totally do wheelchair skateboarding) Palomo (Falls over a lot, but hey he just keeps on going.) Bitters (Absolutely holds it over Palomos head that he’s better at skateboarding) Theta (canon)

Rollerskates:

Kai (Dunno if this one needs an explanation, she might like derby ngl) Donut (He seems like he’d use them as transportation, just skatin around) South (She’d do roller derby and get so competitive about it) CT (Seen some videos of people doing sweet flips and tricks w skates) Ohio (She gives me the vibe of someone who’s got cool iridescent pink roller skates) Andersmith (Picked up skating cause the younger lieutenants were into it) Matthews (He’s a bit unbalanced, but he’s determined)

Rollerblades:

Carolina (Speed, blades are faster than skates) Simmons (He is shaky as hell, but he is trying. Won’t skate anywhere that’s not flat.) Kimball (Lina taught her, they race) Dr Grey (Dunno, just vibes) Jensen (Much like Simmons but with more uneven terrain) Epsilon Church (Picked blades so he could skate w Lina, and to be different from Wash n Alpha) Omega/O’malley (I'm just picturing him chasing people around at high speeds, cackling) Eta (Wanted to try something new, and to spend time w Theta)

Iceskates:

Florida (Specifically figure skating) Felix (Honestly idk, he’s cold and sharp like an ice skate) Delta (He’d ramble about why it’s an intellectual sport, but actually just thinks its fun) Sigma (He’d be rlly pretentious about it)

Scooter:

York (Guy has no balance but still wants to be included) Iota (Cheers on Eta and Theta, does sick scooter tricks)

Other:

Grif (I think he’d have a longboard that he rides around) Sarge (Quad bike) Doc (Also a longboarder) Idaho (I think he’d prefer dirt bike racing) Iowa (Quad bike, it’s like a mongoose) Caboose (Mountain bike, no real explanation, just vibes)

Doesn’t skate (or bike or anything):

Lopez (He prefers cars, might've made an electric skateboard at some point but doesn't rlly use it) Wyoming (Can’t see him skating at all ngl) North (Cheers everyone else on and records videos) Maine (First aid) Locus (Tried to skate once and fell over. Now he just broods from the benches.) Doyle (Too nervous, prefers to just watch) Gamma (I don’t think he’d go outside much ngl)

[dyke-pollinator]

Hey just read one of your recent posts and… you seriously giving out HRT advice? Like, for free???

(If so, uh. I (transfem) live in Florida. Help?)

Sorry this took me a few days to get to <3 I luckily managed to escape the hell hole that is Florida long before figuring out I was trans, and sadly I do not have any personal experience trying to get access to HRT down there now with the new legislation that was recently passed. So just be forewarned that the info I have for you is based on anecdotal evidence given to me by a trans friend who (until recently) lived down there.

The long and short of it is that it is now difficult to access hormones in FL at the moment. As of last May, all people wanting to get on some kind of hormone therapy must have a consent form signed in person given to you by an MD or DO. A Nurse Practitioner will not work and you will not be able to access anything through strictly online means anymore. There is no way around this and is a step that must be taken.

Planned Parenthood is still a big resource, I do not know with certainty whether all of the locations will have an MD or DO that will be able to complete the consent form for you, but from what I have gathered, they are still a great resource for information and helping you get in to see someone who is still willing to prescribe hormones in the state.

The other two organizations I was recommended are Hope And Help and the Campaign for Southern Equality Florida branches. Theyre able to offer you a lot of resources for knowing what your rights are, and communicating with Doctors offices and pharmacies to get you your prescriptions. I've not worked with them myself, but I have heard good things.

Sadly, even with these resources, it may still be difficult to get access to care in Florida. Some doctors offices are refusing to prescribe HRT and some pharmacies are refusing to fill prescriptions due to a combination of bigotry and fear of legal repercussions.

All of this assumes that you are also at least 18+, unfortunately as a minor, the process would be even more difficult and would require full support from your parents to even have a hope of getting access.

Here are some links to the organizations I was talking about. Planned Parenthood Locations in FL that offer In Person Gender Affirming Care: https://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-center?location=Florida&service=lgbtservice&channel=onsite&page=1 Hope and Help FL Branch: https://www.myflfamilies.com/hopeflorida

Campaign for Southern Equality FL Branch: https://southernequality.org/legal-resources/florida/

And if you'd like to reach out to me in DMs I may be able to put into contact with some folks who are more intimately familiar with the experience of getting and maintaining access to HRT after SB 254 went into effect.

And if you do manage to get onto HRT, I will always strongly recommend starting with injections over pills or patches if you can handle actually doing the injections yourself.

[moonlightdancer26]

My predicted ratings of Taylor Swift’s songs in her upcoming album The Tortured Poets Department:

(hey, so basically to anyone who isn’t a Swiftie, this post is gonna make zero sense to you so just ignore this lol)

1. Fortnight — 5/10, I genuinely don’t think I’ll like it, maybe it’s bc the AI version on tiktok isn’t my style at ALL and kinda ruined it for me. Plus the title doesn’t stick out at all and I’m so sad that this song is track 1, esp considering her most recent album Midnights had an iconic opening track.

2. The Tortured Poets Department — 8/10, I always LOVE her title tracks and I’m so excited for this one.

3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favourite Toys — 7/10, the title doesn’t really stick out to me but I feel like it’s gonna end up being an amazingly catchy song. Negative points for the easy rhyme. (“boy” “toy”)

4. Down Bad — 10/10, I’M CLAIMING THIS SONG IDC IDC, I HAVE SUCH HIGH HOPES

5. So Long, London — 10/10, I’m actually terrified to listen to this song bc not only is it TRACK FIVE, but I know for a fact that I’ll sob. I’M SO EXCITED AND SCARED.

6. But Daddy I Love Him — 5/10, not too bad not too good, love the Little Mermaid reference but idk something tells me that I won’t vibe with this song

7. Fresh out the Slammer — 6.5/10, the title’s interesting and I have no idea what to expect

8. Florida!!! — 4/10, hate to say it but I feel like this might be my least favourite

9. Guilty as Sin? — 10/10, ALSO CLAIMING THIS SONG, I’m so excited for this omgg

10. Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me? — 6/10, I feel like the lyrics are gonna be similar to her song Anti-Hero, which makes me super happy, but I’m deducting points for the painfully corny title.

11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) — 9/10 for relatability reasons. Like damn Taylor thanks for calling me out. But also there’s a SLIGHT possibility that this song is about M*tty Healy and I am simply very concerned about that.

12. loml — 7.5/10, I just KNOW it isn’t just gonna stand for “love of my life.” Taylor’s too much of a genius to use that abbreviation for its common meaning.

13. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart — 7.5/10, -2.5 points for the corny title, but I do expect to cry when I hear this song, and well, who doesn’t love songs that make you want to rip your hair out?

14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived — 9/10, I saw someone on tiktok say there’s a correlation between this and the story of Rumpelstiltskin and it blew my mind. I have high hopes for this

15. The Alchemy — 9/10, manifesting that this sounds like The Archer and has parallels to Invisible string (“a single thread of gold tied me to you”) 🙏🏼🙏🏼

16. Clara Bow — 9/10, I just know this song is gonna be interesting and addicting as hell

On April 19, I’ll reblog this post after I listen to the full album and I’ll confirm or deny these predicted ratings. If anyone wants to join in on this, go ahead!