#as in tacky rambles a whole fucking lot

[jabberwockprince]

finished the fake stars of vinyl city intros for my bebes <3 kind of a redesign/redraw of the old ones here

sometimes, revolution starts with a violent and petty mechanic, their younger brother who really wants to join the airforce and a defective 1010 they both found in the trash! rambling about them under the cut

Rikki is a former troublemaker and musician who had to sort their life out back into the straight and narrow to raise their little brother, Yiruk. So they went and got a degree in engineering! They're responsible for upgrading the NSR bots and adding extra levels for the Approach stages (entirely because I wanted to make those more relevant, teehee)

To level the field, Rikki also offers upgrades and cosmetics for Mayday and Zuke's transformation thingamajigs! All in exchange for "spare parts" - these can be obtained by playing specific levels with specific remixes/modes, namely 1010 or Approach levels.

After buying all of Rikki's upgrades, they reveal to Mayday and Zuke that all the spare parts they've been getting are going into fixing a friend of theirs - a defective 1010 robot hiding in Dream Fever.

That defective 1010 robot is Ban! He was meant to be another replacement for Haym, but a little oopsie during a concert got his ass benched and set up for repairs. Afraid of being reset, he ran away and found Yiruk, who then convinced Rikki to patch him up.

His name is short for banana, because he looks like one and they're sweet just like him. Do not question him, it's his new life as a rogue bot and he gets to pick his name <3 Ban loves to wear clothes with tacky patterns and bright colors, like cheetah or zebra prints! So he unlocks a bunch of tacky clothes for Mayday and Zuke

He's absolutely going through a lot of shit regarding his identity and individuality and general newfound consciousness, but he remains very upbeat and peppy about the whole thing. He's one bolt away from snapping though.

I like to think that the rock revolution lasted way longer, with NPCs Mayday and Zuke met kinda taking over their own respective districts - so B2J inspiring Yiruk to be a rockstar causes Yiruk to start a band with Rikki and Ban. Which indirectly leads to the fall of Metro District during the rock revolution <3 like come on, those fuckin cannons in the final level that are literally built to look like Mayday and Zuke's faces????? thats so fucking COOL i wish they expanded more on this section

[inter--cept]

media i wish could exist, but it wont

i have a lot of ideas like this, so i thought i’d take the time to write a recent one out. really a fucking ramble though im not even gonna try to organize this, sorry if youre reading it a movie i wish existed is something titled along the lines of PHYSICS / DAGGER / [something in all-caps and SCP/GOC coded] following a Global Occult Coalition team working in a large city (perhaps a megastructure created by 184) to quash [insert GoI here] efforts to acquire the object in question, and then destroy it. i feel some re-naming of various things is in order (Chaos Insurgency is a bit tacky), or names just left vague for such organizations. part of what builds horror is leaving some things unknown, and that cannot be possible really with the whole knowledge of the SCP wiki and Wanderer’s Library being relevant. So perhaps the anomalous situation in this film could be retracted to only include the Coldest War canon, and some select entries and GoIs? I have always imagined such a thing as being set sometime around 2019 - could be any modern enough year really. the setting just needs to be familiar to most people so that the effect of things that aren’t supposed to happen *happening* takes hold more quickly and (ideally) viscerally. it would borrow a lot of stylistic and narrative aspects from Tenet and DECLARE, with firefights executed like HEAT (blanks, real audio, actual small-unit tactics employed at the time of making, no score during action, grounded character actions, actual radio protocol, etc). to me, the looming sense of the unknown horrors being compartmentalized above your head in DECLARE is really special. tenet sort of has that, but what strikes me more is how the whole movie feels separated from time, not only because of its plot, but the nature of the forces at work in it. Combining that detached, cold sensation with the Looming Horrors (but you’ve got to serve) could make it not necessarily the most unique, but at the least very poignant. and a movie usually has a score of some sort, right? this is probably my industrial / noise / dark ambient skew showing, but i initially came up with this while listening to Maenad Veyl’s album, Body Count. it’s consistently unnerving - sometimes energetic, sometimes ominous. The sheer bass combined with harsh claps, the reversed and chopped bells / xylophone / triangle, random ominous strings i cant identify, its all wonderful and feels slightly otherworldly

[digitaldollsworld]

Okay I hate this trial and I forget how long and convoluted it is but before I go to sleep I will say that there are a lot of things I like about this chapter. Celeste’s major reveal is really good (even tho it is a bit convenient for she and Hiro to have the same name; but now, in hindsight, it makes total sense for her to go for Hiro and to push for him specifically/try to frame him, etc. When I first got into DR, I legit had no idea why she would try to frame Hiro of all people until the very end the trial. Very interesting.)

I love the buildup to the 4th trial, which is my second favorite of this entire game. We’re already getting the very cemented character foil of Hina & Byakuya; it’s already made itself apparent just by the way they carry themselves, but it’s particularly starting to become more obvious in this trial (Hina crying and being v v rattled by the bodies, vs. Byakuya not only initially calling the investigation boring, but also then turning around to laugh and say that they would be better off without Toko. Which Hina calls him out for as well. She says something along the lines of: “How could you say something like that?”) EXCELLENT foreshadowing. Ahhh god their whole character foil and dynamic is just so so good.

I love the fact that nearly everybody instantly accused Hiro, bc that’s where the evidence obviously initially pointed, but from the jump Makoto never did that… perhaps bc he knows how it feels to be instantly accused of being guilty without anybody pulling out any fucking evidence, doing any investigation, or using any critical thinking. I think that he empathized with him.

The naegiri’s being cemented here too. I don’t think they’ve gotten into their little spat yet, right? But Makoto straight up asks her where tf she was for like, 90% of this investigation, and asks her to tell him? And she’s like “no lol” and gets v defense. When they do have their little spat, iirc he’s like “how the hell are you gonna get mad at me for keeping a secret when that’s all you’ve been doing this entire time, is keeping secrets?” And ofc I’m sure he’s referring to this whole investigation as well.

Celeste as a whole is such an interesting fucking character to me. Her mindset, her coping mechanisms, her motives and her backstory. The way she went about this trial. The way she slowly loses grasp on her facade and composure the more and more the trial drags out. The way she reacted to her execution Really, all of it is really good. I like her character. Even tho this trial… ugh I just don’t like it for the most part. It just drags out forever and ever. But it’s good for what it is.

(Last thing but this is just something stupid. They find Hifumi’s Princess Piggles glasses cloth and Makoto’s like “oh it has to be Hifumi’s. He’s the only person that would use something like this” and everybody points out that the only other people who wear glasses, that it could even possibly be, are Toko and Byakuya. And Byakuya straight up is like “I wouldn’t be caught dead using a tacky piece of garbage like that.” Please he’s so fucking funny 💀

Okay that’s it enough rambling I’m going to bed goodnight aklfjsdjfjsd

[stuckonvenus]

Love In the Time of Calderas, Vol. III

No one ever said marriage was easy; and Madisen certainly hadn’t gotten that impression from his own folks, but if he knew there would be nights like this — where all they could think to do was argue about nothing until they were coughing up blood, maybe he wouldn’t have been so quick to the draw proposing only but three years ago. He loved Posey. More than anything he loved her. But goddamn, did she know him too well. She knew when to pick a fight, where to hit first, and most importantly: where to land the final blow. And yet she was uniquely considerate about it. She never compared him to his father, even if it might’ve been justified, and she didn’t bring up the perfect marriage between his older brother and his wife, because everyone knew that was more of a farse than two teenagers who were stupidly in love with a couple hundred to splurge on a tacky wedding. 

“Holy fuck, you aren’t even listening,” Madisen combed his fingers through his hair before resting his hands on his hips. Posey was going on about how much overtime he was undertaking at work, accusing him of wanting to avoid her after their last altercation where she suggested he give up the ghost and try to get a real job that could support them both. Something practical. “I don’t wanna work at your dad’s shitty fucking law firm. Everyone knows all they do is defend murderers and rapists and — and fucking people who still listen to Nickelback—”

“Oh my God, all you do is shit on my dad, it’s so fucking exhausting,” Posey laughed humorlessly as she placed a palm on her forehead in disbelief. “Just because you have problems with yours doesn’t mean you get to drag mine down. He’s a good man who chose to defend people—”

Madisen didn’t let her finish before interjecting. “—who are literal scum of the earth, yeah,” he nodded along. “Honestly, I’m surprised you haven’t asked him to defend me whenever we fight, considering what a villain I am every time.”

“You’re so dramatic,” she scoffed. “This is serious. I know you like what you do, but you have to start acting like an adult now, Madi. We can’t survive off of the two cases you get a month and my salary at a fucking coffee shop. I wanna get a house with you, I wanna have a real life that isn’t just hopping from apartment to apartment.”

“So we can only have a life if it’s happening behind a white picket fence?” he asked with raised brows. “I don’t know what you expect me to do. I’m going to school for this, I’m almost done with my degree, and two cases is a lot for someone my age. I’m doing more than half my class has in the last year, I’m certainly making more. Sorry that a fucking two bedroom apartment isn’t a Barbie Dreamhouse, but we’ve got time to make a life, Posey. There only time that’s being kept is by you.”

Posey began pacing the room out of frustration, unable to speak properly without forming the counter in her head first — which always gave her husband more time to ramble on. “You won’t even try,” she insisted. “We’re married, Madi, and everyone is expecting us to grow up and act like it because that was a choice we made. I want us comfortable. You know we both hate it here, we’re not even that close to campus or our friends, and if we moved uptown we’d be that much closer to our families.”

“I want us alive,” Madisen said, almost sounding pleading as he took a step toward her. “I don’t want to play house, Posey. I can’t do that. And I do like it here, actually, it’s not a bad place and I don’t have any fucking reason to want to be closer to my family.”

Her blue eyes blazed at him suddenly, and he could feel his heart do a somersault in his chest from the ice cold fear piercing his chest just then. “And my family doesn’t matter? Because I don’t have a reason to not like them?” she asked.

“That’s not what I said,” Madisen immediately denied. 

“It’s how you said it,” she said in return. “You want me to stay cowered here forever with you when there’s a whole world we’re missing out on because you just — you just want it to be the two of us!”

Madisen’s brows knitted together as he thought on her words, eventually shaking his head. “What’s so bad about that?” he asked genuinely, which made Posey’s eyes softened; out of pity, surely, because she wasn’t the kind of person to feel regret. She always meant everything she said. He rolled his shoulders before dropping them and giving a deep-seated sigh. Fuck. How did he still say stupid shit to girls, even when he was married to one? 

“... It can’t just be us, Madi,” she told him quietly. “We’ll drive each other even more crazy. You know that.”

He did. It was unreasonable for him to expect her to only want the two of them forever. Look how it’d gotten them so far. He might’ve put distance between himself and all the people he thought brought out the worst in him, but he’d never considered the idea that he did that on his very own. God, how could she stand him sometimes? When he couldn’t even stand himself? Maybe that’s what soulmates were for; loving someone even when you don’t know how, or for what. 

“So... What’s your plan, Pose? I get a job back in Washington and settle down like my douchebag brother and act like life is perfect?” he asked.

Posey stared up at him. “I don’t have a plan. I haven’t had a plan since the day we got married, Madi. And all I wanted was a life with you, not... An existence. Because that’s all we do. We eat and sleep and breathe but we don’t do anything else. You’re gone or I am, or both of us, and we miss each other but not enough to change what’s obviously broken. So — maybe my plan is to have one... One without you.”

Madisen could feel the world collapse inside his chest at her words. Before he could open his mouth to respond, he stumbled where he stood, a blast from six hundred miles away quaking their tiny studio apartment and threatening the foundation underneath them. He leaned against the wall with one hand whenever the tremors stopped from below, and before he could reach forward Posey already had her hand on the remote.

“You know what they’ve been saying, haven’t you?” she asked, panic masking the defeat that was evident in her voice moments earlier. “About that caldera at Yellowstone. You don’t think—?”

As the television buzzed to life, they both watched, side by side, as an anchorman nervously delivered breaking news of an eruption at Yellowstone National Park. He could feel it. The moment where his whole life was changing. He thought it was intense enough when he was getting married, but this was an entirely new kind of fear. Camera footage displayed on screen showed the decimated caldera and everything that was being destroyed in its path. His eyes flickered instinctively to the bottom of the screen, where he could read a reel of the potentially most vulnerable areas would be. He knew that they weren’t close enough for an immediate order of evacuation, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to wait for some government official to tell them when they could leave.

“Come on,” Madisen as he took ahold of Posey’s hand and led her to their bedroom. “We’ll go out to the coast. Malibu or something. Make another honeymoon out of it.” As if that were the cure-all to calling it quits and the end of the world.

Posey followed along, still partially in shock. “Madi, we — we can’t leave them behind,” she spoke up eventually. “My parents, yours... We have to call them, make sure they’re okay. Oh, God, my mom’s in Cheyenne for a conference... Madi, oh my God.” 

Madisen froze where he stood and swallowed thickly. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He still felt the intense urge to flee, but heavier was the instinct to comfort his wife. He enveloped her in his arms and pressed her in close to his chest, to where maybe their heartbeats would synchronize and she would find peace like she always seemed to whenever she would let him hold her like this. 

“... Posey. Posey,” he said softly, stroking her ginger locks tenderly. “I know. It’ll — it’ll be okay. We don’t have to do anything right now. Just take a deep breath, okay?” he said and pulled away so he could cradle her head in his hands. “We’re going to be okay.”

She began shaking her head, unable to deny him even if she didn’t want to believe. “What am I going to do, Madi?” she asked him weakly. “I — I don’t know anything but you. What am I supposed to do?”

He chewed on his lower lip as he looked down at her, stroking away the tears that fell from her waterline with the pad of his thumb. “Let’s just make it through today, and we’ll worry about the rest tomorrow,” he said. This was as calm as he’d ever be again, but he didn’t know that yet. All he knew was that he had to keep her for as long as he could, until she finally let go. And that day would come, but in that moment, they were together, at the end of the world, and that’s all he ever envisioned for them anyway.

[tackyink]

Rambling for real about things that happened ages ago. tl;dr my school from 16 to 18 was pretty crappy

I was reading the link to the Père Lachaise bat lore on the last reblog because I did a project on that cemetery, along with a few others, when I was 17. In order to graduate from our equivalent of high school, you need to do a big project with a presentation on your last year, and my school forced us to make it a group project because the faculty just didn’t want to deal with triple or quadruple work. They heartily recommended us to pick people from our own class and do something related to our branch of study, so of course I went and joined forces with my close friend group, which was split into three separate branches (tech, humanities and social sciences). Our homeroom teachers didn’t seem to mind a lot, so we went to grab something to eat after school and brainstorm about what we could do.

In the end, we settled on cemetery art. There’s a couple of interesting cemeteries in our city, so we could do field work instead of just doing a lot of copy pasting from the internet and books.

Problem was that not only did the faculty not want to work, our Art History teacher, who actually liked the idea, was unavailable, and no one else wanted to work specifically with us because they thought the subject was too creepy.

Let’s keep in mind that these were a bunch of 50-something year olds refusing to supervise some teens’ project because they thought looking at angel statues was scary. I... just... what.

In the end, we were assigned the French teacher, who according to the only one of us who had her as a teacher was a bit nasty, and hoo BOY.

There were two groups under her supervision, and she favored the other one and couldn’t even be discreet about it. At least once a week we met with her for an hour to review our progress, and she spent at most 10 minutes looking at our material, not even feigning interest or offering any suggestions, to then go to the other group and chat with them until the time was up. This went on for months. This project was 10% of our grade and the most civil thing that woman said to us all along was that it was nice that we had translated and cleaned up a statue chart that we found on the internet. We ended up doing everything by ourselves.

My Spanish Lit teacher, bless his certified weirdo soul, and my homeroom teacher were the only adults that attended our presentation in a cramped room that wasn’t even used for lessons, and I guess the French teacher hadn’t been saying very nice things about our work because both were pleasantly surprised with the result and congratulated us.

Then, the final nail in the coffin was when the grades came out. We got a 9 out of 10. Nobody in the school got a 10 because according to the teachers we asked, “the perfect project doesn’t exist.”

This was a problem, because students averaging 9 to 10 on a global scale get their first year of university free, and there’s a limit to how many of those a school can give out. One of my female-presenting friends and I were essentially competing for one of the three available spots, and we really needed that extra point because guys had an advantage over us: our PE teacher was a sleazy sexist bastard and it was well known that he never graded guys below 7 and girls above 6, barring two exceptions: we could get up to an 8 playing extracurricular sports or, in one spectacular case we witnessed, being a literal model with very bouncy tits. This isn’t a jab at her, she was a professional model and dressed as such, even to school, and looked older than her age. He liked that. How’s that for creepy, faculty?

Adding to that, I fucked up my knee playing basketball when I was 15 and relapsed at 16, so I had to sit out PE classes for most of the year. I had a flat 5 in my report card.

Our saving grace came with the final meetings the teachers had at the end of our second year. I would bet a lot of money that it was a combo effort by our homeroom teachers, the Spanish Lit wacky man, and the Latin teacher, but they decided to up our PE grades so we could have a 10 in our global grade and get that free pass to university. To which we went together, by the way, so group projects were never shit again.

I didn’t fully realize the gravity of all this until I was older, but the rampant disfunction and cronyism in that school nearly left me out of university. There’s no way I could have afforded it, and with the rapid rise of uni prices in the following years and the economic crisis, there’s even less of a chance that I would have been able to save money and go later. I was very fortunate to have a few choice people willing to stick their necks out for me, but I also hope the French and PE teachers choked on a spiky dick in the years that have elapsed since then. At least they fired the English teacher after only ~10% of us passed the English test in our uni access exams.

[jaskierswolf]

Flaming Desires

Summary: In a world where soulmates are connected through their kinks and sexual desires, Geralt and Jaskier decide to try out something new in the bedroom. Luckily for both of them, Geralt is a firefighter.

Rating: E

CW: No sex but lots of sexual content, wax play, dom/sub vibes, general hoey vibes, mentions of sex work.

Part three in this AU, part two written by @geraltrogerericduhautebellegarde. Your turn babe 😘

Also shout out to @kuripon for beta-ing

________

Dreams; they were going to be Geralt’s downfall. On the menu this week was wax play, something that hadn’t even realised he was into, but he just couldn’t stop dreaming about it. Jaskier had taken the week off filming for his OnlyFans page, so it wasn’t a video, and yet Geralt couldn’t see an ordinary tea light without getting hard. Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem but Jaskier had arranged a date that evening so the two of them were sat in Jaskier’s kitchen with the lights down low, and a tacky christmas candle holder sat in the middle of the table.

And Geralt couldn’t stop watching the flame, the tiny pool of molten wax at the base of the wick. It was ridiculous but he had to sit on his hand to stop himself from reaching for the candle and dipping his fingers into the wax. He’d never had this problem before. He was a firefighter for god’s sake, fire wasn’t sexy.

“Jask?”

“Yes, darling?” Jaskier cocked his head, a coy smile playing on his lips.

“Are the candles a you thing?” Geralt asked, groaning as he tried to ignore his erection and eat his food but it was persistent and he was feeling particularly horny.

His soulmate just chuckled, never breaking eye contact as his lips wrapped around his fork. The bastard then had the audacity to moan softly, licking his lips in a way that was unfairly seductive, and Geralt was about two seconds from clearing the table and having his way with Jaskier right then and there.

“Don’t even think about it,” Jaskier purred in a low voice. “I have plans tonight, and I will not have you ruin them by being a brute.”

“Fuck you.”

“Spoilers,” the musician trilled, winking as he sipped his wine. The liquid stained his lips red which only made him look even more irresistible.

“I regret introducing you to Doctor Who,” Geralt groaned.

“No you don’t, you love me,” Jaskier giggled.

“You never answered the question,” Geralt reminded him gently, “Candles?”

His soulmate hummed, tongue swiping across his lips, as he tilted his head. Long fingers danced along the rim of his wine glass, and his blue eyes twinkled in the candlelight. All in all, Jaskier looked ethereal, something out of a painting, a fairytale. He even had the name to match, Jaskier, Buttercup, Dandelion. Geralt’s beautiful flower; gorgeous and deadly.

And completely insatiable.

“I thought they were a you thing?” Jaskier asked slowly.

Maybe they were, or maybe they’d ended up in some weird kinky loop through the soulbond… which Geralt had finally admitted existed. There was just no way it was some kind of coincidence. When he was feeling intolerably horny, there was Jaskier lying on his bed at the end of work, dressed in the prettiest stockings and Dandelion’s make-up. When he was feeling in the mood for just a good nature documentary and cuddles, Jaskier would turn up at his door with two onesies and a bag of takeout. They were just in sync, almost every day.

Geralt had never had someone in his life that had understood him like this before and it was completely exhilarating-- terrifying, but exhilarating. His brothers teased him about it relentlessly, and they were both careful about telling people how they really met, but Geralt had never been happier.

Even if he was discovering kinks he never knew he had.

Wax play… really?

“Well, fuck.”

Jaskier frowned, scratching absentmindedly at the scruff that was beginning to grow. He preferred to stay clean shaven for Dandelion, but in between videos he got lazy, and Geralt would be the first to admit it was a good look on his boyfriend. “Did you want to?”

“Yes,” Geralt said, probably far too quickly. “Yes,” he repeated more slowly as he felt his cheeks heat up, “but I don’t know how.”

Jaskier’s hand cupped his cheek, fingers caressing his jaw as they fell away. “I’ve done research. Do you trust me?”

“Always.”

“Well, that’s a lie. You wouldn’t even let me chop the vegetables,” Jaskier teased.

The memory of Jaskier’s cack-handed attempts at prepping the veg made Geralt shudder. The knives had been blunt and Jaskier had narrowly avoided a trip to A&E. “I trust you,” Geralt said again, grinning at his boyfriend, “just not with things that could kill you.”

“Fire kills,” Jaskier reminded him, “or didn’t my insanely pretty firefighter boyfriend forget?”

“I won’t let the house burn down, Jask.”

His soulmate giggled. “Can you imagine that phone call? ‘Hey, Eskel, It’s Geralt. We almost burnt Jaskier’s flat down playing with candles in the bedroom.’” Jaskier’s tone took on a gruff growl as he mimicked Geralt’s voice.

And that was it. Geralt stood up and pulled his soulmate into a kiss before he could protest, the taste of shitty red wine still on his lips. Jaskier moaned into the kiss, his fingers digging into Geralt’s hips and they both stumbled to the bedroom, dinner promptly forgotten.

In Jaskier’s bedroom were a few candles, plain looking, and yet Geralt felt a whole new wave of arousal. They were actually doing this, and Jaskier had apparently prepared. He was pleased to see a small bucket of water in the corner of the room and the fire blanket from the kitchen. There were times that he forgot that Jaskier and Dandelion the sex worker were the same person. Jaskier was a professional, and he took everything they did very seriously… and Geralt fucking loved him for it. He felt safe when they played like this, and it even gave him the confidence to submit to his soulmate. That hadn’t happened very often before Jaskier.

Geralt squeezed Jaskier’s hand as he pulled him over to the bed, cupping his cheeks as they kissed lazily, neither in any real rush, until Jaskier pulled away. He was smiling softly at Geralt in a way that made his heart flutter, as if there was any doubt how much Geralt loved him.

“Take off your shirt, love,” Jaskier told him, pressing a final kiss to Geralt’s cheek before getting up to fetch the candles. “I ordered a soy candle, it’s meant to be good for beginners. Cooler burn rate, but you will let me know if it hurts too much? We can stop at any time, just say your word,” Jaskier started to ramble, a nervous habit that Geralt found so endearing.

He pulled off his shirt before crossing the room to press his lips to the nape of Jaskier’s neck and his arms wrapped around his boyfriend’s middle. “Stop worrying, Julek.”

“Oh,” Jaskier hummed.

“I trust you,” Geralt reminded him.

“Hmm, I love you,” Jaskier murmured, spinning in Geralt’s arms and capturing his lips in a kiss. “Okay, right, on the bed.”

“Back or front?” Geralt asked, but he already knew the answer. He always seemed to know, but Jaskier liked to verbalise it so Geralt let him, especially as this was a new kind of play for them.

“Front please. Thank you, darling,” Jaskier smiled warmly as he struck a match, the soft golden glow from the flame lighting up his face beautiful, before he lit one of the candles.

Geralt did as he was told, propping himself up on his arms whilst he waited for his soulmate. He closed his eyes and let his mind drift, focusing on the soft melody that Jaskier was humming under his breath. There was a tingle of heat itching under his skin, and he was pretty sure his boxers were a mess in his trousers from the way his cock was aching. He had no doubt he was already leaking, but he did his best to stay still, resisting the urge to rut against the mattress. Jaskier would tell him if he were allowed to do so.

“Oh look at you, absolutely perfect, pretty as a picture,” Jaskier cooed.

His cheeks burnt, and he had to bury his face in his arms. Geralt loved the praise, but he was easily overwhelmed by it, in a good way, mostly. He still struggled to believe that Dandelion, his crush for so long, was now his boyfriend - no - his soulmate, that the videos were and always had been practically made for before either of them knew.

Jaskier pressed a kiss to his shoulder, and he hummed, letting his boyfriend know he was okay, and then Jaskier’s fingers were in his hair, scraping against his scalp. The sensation was nearly too much and he moaned, the sound muffled by his arms. Jaskier chuckled as he pulled Geralt’s hair into what felt like a ribbon, and then Geralt felt his boyfriend’s hands run down the length of his spine.

“Fuck,” he groaned.

They’d barely started and already he felt like his entire body was on fire. He felt heady with arousal and his cock was aching to be touched.

“Ready?” Jaskier asked, his voice sounding as wrecked as Geralt felt.

Geralt just grunted, and then, at Jaskier’s stern silence, mumbled a ‘yes’. He shivered as he felt Jaskier’s breath against his skin, gasping as Jaskier swatted his arse. The room was silent apart from the soft singing of his soulmate, and Geralt could do nothing but wait patiently, or rather impatiently.

Until…

“Cock!” Jaskier spluttered, his words swiftly followed by a resounding thud.

“What the fuck?”

He bolted upright, still feeling a little spaced, but he recognised the smell of carpet burning and it was enough to cut through the fog in his mind. Jaskier was sitting on the floor, legs sprawled and the candle had fallen onto the rug, catching on the synthetic fibres.

“Jaskier!” he growled, snapping his boyfriend from his shock.

“Oh- oh fuck!” Jaskier scrambled for the water bucket.

The fire didn’t last long but the mood was killed. They both just stared at each other across the singed rug, until Jaskier cracked a smile and they burst into laughter. Jaskier couldn’t stop apologising in between fits of giggles, pressing his face into Geralt’s neck to hide his embarrassment. Despite the almost torturous week of wet dreams prior, Geralt could only chuckle as he held his boyfriend close.

They would just have to try again another day.

[sablegear0]

I know we’re all mad at Other M for various reasons but, credit where credit is due, when the game is putting in effort it is very pretty.

I’ve been poking around for reference images while working on “Cyanide” and I need to take a minute to just ramble about Adam’s absolutely cavernous fucking office. Look at this.

Look how huge this space is! Wikitroid sources Adam’s height at around 6′ so already we’re looking at something like 15′ ceilings, at least. And this angle doesn’t even show the whole width of that window, the framing implies there’s more room off to the right.

And it is empty. There is nothing in this room. Granted it could be smart-configurable, with stuff hidden under the floor panels but somehow I doubt that. Because if that were the case you’d think his desk and chair would also be on-demand furniture, right? Nope.

Star Trek-lookin’-ass oldschool wood furniture. Oversized leather chair. Other M did some weird stuff to the Federation aesthetic compared to the Prime games, lemme tell ya (I mean, Adam’s uniform too but that’s a whole other ramble).

But now that I’m here overthinking it, I realize once again Other M offers so much more intrigue than it explores. Why is this room so empty? Is that the standard for GF officers? Or is that just Adam? If the latter, is it because he doesn’t spend a lot of time here? Or is it because he actually just can’t be arsed to decorate the place?

And you know, I initially thought it was tacky visual short-hand in a melodramatic flashback, but the single picture frame actually says a lot here. There’s nothing else in this room, no indications of personality, except that frame and whatever is on that shelf behind him. I don’t know how common hard-copy media are in the Metroidy future, but the fact that Adam has actual books and a physical photograph could say a lot about him. Maybe he’s got a bit of an old-fashioned streak we don’t hear about? Who the hell knows. Other M certainly isn’t going to tell us.

Anyway that’s it, I’m done for now. Had to get that out of my head. Thank-you for your time.

[dandunn]

Do you like American Gods (the book)? It's one of my faves so I'm curious to hear your opinion on it :)

Sorry had to delay answering this because I had about 50 pages left and I had to run and finish it haha.

I really liked it! Sometimes the pacing was a bit... leisurely, but that's not always a bad thing. It really feels like one huge road trip where enjoying the journey is the whole point.

I pretty much immediately liked and related to Shadow and he's probably the reason why I decided to splash and buy the book. Protagonists who are huge and strong and maybe have a bad rep, but are also more kind and more intelligent than they let on are TOTALLY the best kind and want to kiss him.

I think my favourite gods were definitely the Egyptian pantheon, Mr Ibis/Thoth, Jacquel/Anubis, Horus and Bast. I was an Egyptology kid so I fucking love those guys. The part where *mild spoiler* Shadow gets a bit dead and sees their true forms was one of my favourite bits.

I also really enjoyed the side story involving the car on the ice where it became a murder mystery because Holy shit. That payoff was great (I figured it was obvious who did it but the reveal still made me 🤯)

The whole main plot reveal was also great, I love how the story kind of switched gears like that. And Laura's whole payoff was also amazing. Rest in peace girl.

Ummm yeah I'm also kind of an nerd for gaudy, awful, tacky Americana so I loved seeing real places like House on the Rock and Rock City come into it. Like wow! that place sounds awful and I thought it was a great place for the gods to square off.

I could probably ramble a bit more but maybe I'll do that if/when I watch the show. BUT I also like how there's chapters that go into the dark side of American history because there's a LOT of it and I found some chapters challenging to read, like the stuff about slavery and the many awful things done in the name of colonisation. But you know. It Happened and its good that Gaiman doesn't shy away from it at all.

I dunno I just thought that was admirable, and me not being American I just... flat out didn't learn about this stuff in school, especially the native American side of things (side note: I also rly like Whiskey Jack as a character he's fun)

I'm sure people smarter than me have spoken in more detail about this series and I'm VERY late to the party but yeah 😂 Shadow call me pls 😍📞

[idnek83]

Can u write something about soudam wedding?

I’m sorry this took like 3 weeks to answer, but here you go: 4.3k word worth of Soudam wedding ramblings.

(This is for a western style wedding by the way)

Wedding Planning

Neither of them know what they’re doing, cus neither of them ever really spent much time thinking about weddings growing up, much less their own weddings lol

So one day, after they’re engaged, they’re just hanging out with some friends. They’re on a couch, Soda’s laying with his head in Gundham’s lap, just vibing, then their friends start asking about what they have planned. They both kind of look at each other and shrug, cus they have planned literally nothing, they just know they kind of want to get married on their anniversary, but that’s really all they’ve got lol.

Sonia like presses them for ideas cus they must have at least some idea of what they want, right?

Soda looks up at Gundham and is like ‘probably lots of black stuff, yeah?’

Gundham nods and looks down at him ‘perhaps with vibrant accents in your preferred colors as well?’

Soda’s like ‘Oooh and we could have like an animal theme maybe?? OH! OR A ROBOT ANIMAL THEME????’ and Gundhams just like ‘whatever makes you happy’ and they throw out a couple more terrible ideas while Sonia silently suffers lol.

Eventually they’re laughing at their own stupid ideas and Sonia is just glad they actually realize their ideas were dumb and they didn’t seriously want a goth robot hamster ice sculpture lol. They admit they don’t super care how it all goes down, they both just want to get married and have fun with all their friends at the reception.

Sonia offers to take care of the planning and stuff with her team of professionals (Yes she has a team on wedding planners okay, she’s the kind of person who has been planning her wedding since she was 9 and also she’s a princess so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯). She seems really excited and Soda and Gundham really don’t know what they’re doing so they agree to let her handle it as long as they get the final say on things. She immediately starts rambling about all her ideas and Soda and Gundham just kind of chuckle and smile at each other.

 Suit shopping

Fuyuhiko takes them suit shopping. They go together, they aren’t too concerned about keeping their outfits a secret from each other and they figure it’ll be fun to watch each other try on all kind of different things. Sonia comes too of course.

They start kind of idlily browsing sample suits (they’re getting custom suits made, Fuyuhiko wouldn’t hear otherwise) and Sonia asks what kind of suits they’d like to see each other in. They both stop and look at each other, and Fuyu rolls his eyes cus they’re just blatantly checking each other out lol.

Eventually Soda shrugs and is like “I don’t really care. As long as I get to see Gundham looking hot as hell in a tux I’m good with whatever” and Gundham kind of tilts his head and is like “So you would prefer me to wear a tuxedo?” Soda is dumb as hell and doesn’t realize Gundham is not using ‘tuxedo’ as a synonym for ‘suit’ like he was, so he gets super blushy and is like “Oh. I-I mean if you were thinking about a dress instead that’s cool too.” And Gundham’s eyes just widen a bit because he was not thinking about wearing a dress but now he’s thinking about Soda in a big, white, full skirted wedding dress. Soda is picturing Gundham in something a little more fitted with a high slit. They’re both just blushing and staring at each other until Fuyu clears his throat and tells Soda that a tuxedo is a type of suit, and he’s pretty sure that’s what Gundham meant. Soda just hides his face in his hands and apologizes. Gundham comes over to kiss his forehead and tell him it’s okay, and eventually they get back to looking at suits lol

Gundham’s done pretty quick. He does end up picking a tuxedo, and I’m not great at fashion but Just picture something black, very gothic, and a tiny bit extra haha. Soda super excited to see it once it’s done being made, cus Gundham already looked amazing in the sample suit. He maybe gets a little emotional looking at his fiancé all dressed up knowing it’s for their wedding, but nobody says anything and Gundham just smiles at him softly.

Soda has a lot more trouble. He doesn’t want to ruin their wedding by wearing something tacky so he’s trying to stick to traditional black. But every time he comes out and looks at himself in the full length mirror he can’t help but feel uncomfortable. He doesn’t look like himself,  he thinks he looks like some kid borrowing his dad’s suit for prom.

He’s on like the 12th sample suit, he���s trying all kinds of styles and different lapels and undershirts/vest combos but he still just feels like trash in all of them. This suit fits him like a glove, accentuates all of his best features, and he honestly looks so good in it. Sonia and Fuyuhiko are telling him as much, along with whatever staff are around.

But Soda still doesn’t feel like himself. And Gundham can tell.

Gundham comes up behind him and wraps his arms around his waist and they both just look at themselves in the mirror for a moment. Gundham makes a point of frowning as he looks at the suit and Soda laughs at how obviously exaggerated it is. It’s the first time he’s genuinely smiled in at least an hour.

“What’s wrong, babe? Don’t like it?”

“Hmm… perhaps if it was yellow… maybe blue?”

Soda laughs but he feels a little self conscious. He really doesn’t want to make their wedding tacky, but he just doesn’t feel right in such… boring colors. He tells Gundham as much. Gundham hums and kisses his cheek, still holding him from behind, and asks to see color samples for the suits materials while Soda insists he’ll be fine and he’ll just get used to the black.

Someone brings Gundham a collection of cloth samples, and he finally separates from his fiancé to stand in front of him and hold them up, one by one. Soda is insisting black is fine the whole time. Eventually Gundham stops, holding up a sort of deep red, and tilts his head. Soda looks at the color; he likes it, but he’s still worried it would be kind of tacky. Gundham asks for someone to bring him a jacket in that color.

He puts it on Soda and grabs a black suit jacket and a red tie for himself, before standing next to Soda and linking their arms. Soda looks in the mirror and, hey, that’s not too bad, the red actually looks pretty classy, and paired up with Gundham’s tie it looks…

He starts crying, but it’s mostly relief and happiness. Fuyu laughs at him but tells him he looks good and Sonia just smiles while Gundham pulls him into a hug. They order the 12th suit in red, and every time Soda tries t apologize for being so difficult Gundham just shuts him up with a kiss lol.

Wedding Traditions and Stuff

They start talking about wedding traditions one day after having a conversation with Sonia about how the wedding plans are going. The first thing that comes up is the whole ‘bride walking down the aisle’ thing since, obviously, there isn’t gonna be a bride. Gundham suggests they both just walk out together, but Soda kind of wants that moment where he’s standing at the alter and gets to watch Gundham walk down the aisle towards him. Gundham just smiles and kisses him and says he’s like that too.

Soda suggests they take dance lessons or something so they can have a cool first dance. Gundham says they can if he really wants to, but he would rather just be able to hold Soda close and sway to the music without having to worry about memorized steps. Soda blushes and agrees, he mostly suggested it cus he thought Gundham would like it anyways.

Neither of them really care about name changes. They both offer to change theirs, but in the end they just decide to keep their own names.

Sonia (jokingly) mentions being disappointed because there won’t be a bouquet toss, and Chiaki (also jokingly) responds that Gundham should just toss a single rose into the crowd like tuxedo mask. He agrees to do it (not jokingly)

They both write their own stupid sappy vows, it’s not even something they have to discuss.

Hajime is Soda’s best man, Sonia is Gundham’s. She insists on being called ‘best man’ instead of ‘maid of honor’ or ‘best woman’ because she likes the way it sounds lol.

They pick a very classic décor theme, but add in a lot of black accents for the aesthetic✨

They decide to do that thing where they spend the night before the wedding apart and don’t see each other again until the actual ceremony.

Bachelor Party

Soda wasn’t planning on having his own bachelor party, he figured they could just have like a joint bachelor party at their house or something because he loves his fiancé and prefers to party with him lol. But then Fuyuhiko, Hajime, and Nekomaru are carrying him out the front door while Gundham casually waves and tells him to have fun lol (They absolutely got Gundham’s permission before kidnapping his man haha).

(Gundham invites Sonia over for wine and calls it his bachelor party. They watch the bachelor and laugh about how funny they are.)

Soda is thrown in the back seat of one of Fuyu’s fancy cars with blacked out windows and yells at his friends for like the whole trip while they just laugh at him lol. They eventually get to a bar and Soda is just super relieved it’s not a strip club, Hajime tells him it’s cus Gundham wouldn’t let him, but Fuyu and Nekomaru insist it’s cus they have more class than that. (Whose lying? You choose lol).

They get a table and a round of shots as soon as they get inside. It’s actually pretty laid back as far as bachelor parties go, they mostly just sit and talk, and get Soda gushing about his soon to be husband lol. At one point, after a couple drinks, they do like a chugging contest for the first time since they graduated uni and Soda wins. Fuyu is just like ‘wtf when did you get so good at this?” and Soda is like “Well, thanks to Gundham I’ve gotten really good at swallowing” and everybody just fucking groans while he loses his mind laughing lol

As the night goes on Soda just gets sappier and sappier and starts complaining about how much he misses his boyfriend. Nekomaru pats him on the back and is like ‘he isn’t even your boyfriend anymore, he’s your fiancé’ and Soda just light up like ‘yeah… I’m so lucky…’ before he stops and his eyes go wide. The other guys kind of look at each other, confused, before Hajime’s like ‘uh, you good dude?’ and Soda’s just like ‘oh my god, he’s my fiancé! We’re gonna get fucking married next week!! Holy shit that means he’s gonna be my husband! I have to tell him!’ and the guys just laugh while he dials Gundham.

Gundham is surprised to get a call from Soda and gets a little worried, so he answers like ‘is everything alright, my paramour?’ and Soda is just like ‘Holy shit Gundham! Did you realize we’re gonna be husbands??!?’ and Gundham just laughs and relaxes while telling Soda that, yes, he did realize they were going to be husbands lol

Soda just rambles away on the phone about how excited he is to marry Gundham and how he promises to be a good husband and how much he loves him. The other guys roll their eyes and decide it’s probably time to call it a night lol.

When Soda gets home he immediately attaches himself to Gundham and tells him how much he missed him lol. Gundham just pets his hair and gets them both ready for bed as he asks if Soda enjoyed his bachelor party. He says his favorite part was when his fiancé kissed him good night, and Gundham just rolls his eyes and does it haha

The Wedding

Soda is super nervous the night before (not in a ‘I’m not ready for this’ way, he’s just excited and scared he’s gonna say/do something dumb or that something terrible is gonna happen and ruin the whole thing) and he ends up calling Gundham from his hotel room at like midnight and talking about all his worries (“What if I say ‘I don’t’ by accident and we have to do the whole wedding again?” “What if I have to pee in the middle of our vows?” “What if we get to the ‘speak now or forever hold your peace’ part and like, Nekomaru suddenly decides he’s in love with you? There’s no way I could take him in a fight!”). Gundham smiles as he reassures Soda that whatever happens, they’ll get through it, and that he doesn’t really care what happens, as long as he gets to call Soda his husband by the end of the day.

They fall asleep telling each other how excited they are.

In the morning their respective best men wake them and help them get ready. Gundham styles his hair up and Soda puts his in a low ponytail, and they both put on their fancy new custom suits (They both got ties to match each other’s suits too haha). They’re both a little nervous but Hajime and Sonia are ready with all kinds of compliments and reassurances, and they get both grooms out their doors and on the road right on time.

Gundham gets to the venue first, and he’s a little taken aback by how good it looks. Sonia gushes about all the little details while Gundham just half listens and thanks her. He’s looking at the flower arrangements sitting in classy black vases, the chairs covered in white cloth held in place with black ribbon, and noticing all kinds of subtly gothic touches Sonia added to the décor. Soda may have been worried about making the wedding tacky with his suit, but Gundham had been worried about making it tacky with shitty gothic decorations. He’s amazed with how well Sonia managed to pull it off. He grabs both her hands and sincerely tells her that he loves her and that she is, and always will be, his dearest friend. They both get a little teary and hug it out haha.

Then Hajime ruins it by kicking in the front door and saying something like ‘Gundham you look hot as fuck, but get out of my sight right now so I can bring your stupid ass fiancé in. Also, hey Sonia, great job decorating.’ Lol

Sonia and Gundham head off into a little room to wait for the ceremony to start, and Hajime heads back out to get Soda. When Soda gets inside he’s just as impressed by the décor as Gundham was. He thinks it’s all very Gundham and he loves it. Hajime tells him he tried to get Sonia to throw in some hot pink roses for Soda and Soda is just like ‘thank god Sonia didn’t listen to you.’ Lol

Soda just heads right into the main hall, just taking in all the amazing décor until his eyes land on the wedding arch. He stares at it and it just really hit him that this is happening. He’s about to marry the love of his life. He’s about to be able to call Gundham his husband. He’s about to be Gundham’s husband. He starts tearing up and Hajime pats him on the back, smiling ‘Come on, ya big sap, lets get you married’

Hajime gets Soda up to the front to take his place under the arch and Sonia comes out to see how things are going. Everything is pretty much ready and the officiant is ready to go, so Sonia heads back to Gundham’s room and the officiant signals everyone to take their seats so they can get things started. Soda’s regained his composure in the tie it took everyone to settle down, and Hajime gives him one last pat on the back before he takes his place to the side and the music starts.

Soda looks up as the door opens and he sears the image into his mind immediately.

Gundham looks amazing, he always does, but there’s just something extra to it in that moment. He’s glowing, Soda decides, and as their eyes lock he feels himself tearing up again. It only gets worse as Gundham gets closer, it’s not long before he’s full on crying. He’s jut so overwhelmed with love and happiness, and he almost wants to sip all the vows and wedding rites and just be married already.

Gundham’s not doing much better. He’s vaguely aware of their friends and family waving to him and complimenting him or congratulating him as he passes, but he’s way too focused on Soda to really care. He looks so handsome in his deep red suit with his hair tied back, and he’s frozen, clutching his hands in front of him nervously the way he had been when Gundham entered. Gundham want’s to run to him, sweep him off his feet and just declare them married himself, but he manages to hold himself back. He doesn’t hold back his tears nearly as well though, and a few roll down his cheeks before he makes it to the altar.

When Gundham gets to Soda he immediately pulls him into a tight hug, Soda wrapping his arms around him just as quickly, and then they’re both laughing through their tears. Gundham gently strokes Soda’s hair, careful not to mess it up, and kisses his forehead. Sonia scoffs to let Gundham know he’s on thin ice for that, she’s very into wedding traditions, but lets it slide since it technically isn’t a real kiss lol.

They eventually pull themselves away from each other a bit and try to wipe away each other’s tears at the same time. It’s a little awkward but they’re happy and don’t care, they just keep staring at each other as they finally step back, still holding hands, and signal to the officiant that they’re ready to start.

Soda says his vows first, it’s on purpose, he wanted to go first cus he knew he would be too busy crying after Gundham’s vows haha. He’s like shaking really hard when he starts, cus he hates public speaking and he’s embarrassed to be so sappy in front of all their friends, but as he talks he watches Gundham light up and it just gets easier and easier, until he’s only shaking from the effort it’s taking not to kiss his groom.

Everyone is expecting Gundham’s vows to be long winded and extra extra, but to their surprise they’re pretty straight forward. Gundham explains, as part of his vows, that he doesn’t need extravagant metaphors to express his love and he wants to speak plainly and clearly, in hopes of expressing how clear his feelings for Soda are (he said he doesn’t need metaphors, nut technically the whole thing is a metaphor lol). Soda is in fact crying well before he finishes, and the only things that stop them from kissing once Gundham stops talking are a stern cough from Sonia and a disapproving tut from Hajime lol

The officiant does their thing, Soda and Gundham requested a shortened version of the usual spiel cus they didn’t want to have to stand through a stupidly long ceremony, but even that feels way too long to them haha. When they get to the ‘speak now or forever hold you peace’ part, Gundham raises a non-existent brow at Soda before gazing pointedly at Nekomaru for a second. Soda snorts and laughs and nobody else gets it, but no one speaks up either haha

Gundham is the first to say ‘I do’, then Soda nearly cuts the officiant off with his own ‘I do’ before they can even finish the question haha. The officiant basically steps out of the way while saying ;you may now kiss cus they can tell these two have no patience lol.

They both lean in before the officiant even finishes speaking. Their lips meet and Soda wraps his arms around Gundham’s neck while Gundham pulls him in by his waist. Their friends are cheering and clapping and both of them are crying again.

They both smile and laugh as they part and make their way back down the aisle, thanking all their friends and family, before heading outside to get some photos taken.

Photos take literal hours (wedding party, friends, family, just them, each of them separate, each of them separate with friends, separate with family, now each individual family member with both of them and each of them separately, etc, etc), and they’re both pretty tired by the end of it. They end up heading back to Gundham’s little waiting room to take a nap together.

Sonia sends Mahiru in to get a picture of them cuddled together on the little couch. Both of them have their suit jackets off, their ties loose, and a couple shirt buttons undone. Soda is lying between Gundham’s legs, head resting sideways on his chest and drooling a little. Gundham as his arms wrapped around Soda’s back and his cheek is pressed against his hair. One of Gundham’s legs is dangling off the front of the too narrow couch, along with one of Soda’s arms.

Despite how sloppy they both look, it’s one of their favorite pictures from their wedding day.

The Reception

When Soda and Gundham wake up from their nap like an hour later, they spend like a solid 20 minutes just tenderly making out being all ‘hey you’re my husband now and I’m gonna keep saying the word husband until we’re both sick of it’ haha (neither of them get sick of it). Eventually Sonia and Hajime come get them, Hajime makes a comment like ‘haha save something for your wedding night guys’ and Sonia is just bluntly like ‘yeah, you two will have plenty of time to fuck later’ lol

They all grab something to eat before the reception because Soda and Gundham have barely eaten anything all day.

Their first dance is literally just them holding each other and kissing and swaying to the music, and Soda is so glad Gundham didn’t want to take dance lessons cus he doesn’t want to do anything but hold and kiss his husband in that moment. After the first dance the champagne starts flowing freely and formal atmosphere dissolves pretty quickly lol

Gundham and Soda have both ditched their jackets and are alternating between chatting and laughing with their friends and rocking out on the dance floor (they’re terrible dancers but it’s their wedding and no one is allowed to judge them lol). They’re both kind of acting like they’re drunk but they haven’t actually had that much to drink, they’re just stupid happy. They keep sneaking off to make out, only for Hajime or Sonia to drag them back lol

By the mid night Gundham has lost his tie (They threw it on the ground during one of their make outs and both of them forgot lol) and Soda has some fresh hickies on his neck, and Sonia and Hajime decide they’ve fulfilled their socialization quota and finally release them lol. They thought about getting a hotel room, but they both agreed they would rather just spend their first night as a married couple in their own bed.

The Wedding Night 👀

(suggestive but not explicit)

They start making out the second they get in the limo (courtesy of the Kuzuryu family) to take them home. They can’t keep their hands off each other, but they manage to keep their clothes on for now haha.

Once they make it home they’re stumbling over each other to get to the door, but then Soda freezes when they get it unlocked and Gundham is just like ??? Soda looks at him wide eyed and is just like ‘I want to do the thing’ and before Gundham can figure out what he means, Soda literally sweeps him off his feet and carries him bridal style into their home. Gundham just laughs and lets it happen.

Soda throws Gundham onto the bed and jumps on top of him, resuming their earlier make outs for  bit before Gundham pushes him back. Its Soda’s turn to be like ??? but Gundham just says he has a surprise for him and heads off to the bathroom.

Soda is 100% expecting lingerie, but when Gundham steps out in a lacy white baby doll with matching white panties and stockings he nearly dies from joy.

Gundham says he noticed the way Soda had reacted to the idea of him in a wedding dress during their suit fitting and went out to buy this outfit pretty much right after. Maybe it wasn’t quite a wedding dress, but it definitely had a bridal feeling to it.

Once some of Soda’s blood makes it back up to his brain, he smirks and points out that Gundham doesn’t really qualify for the whole wearing white on your wedding day thing’ and Gundham’s like ‘hmm, really? Better make sure, just in case’

It’s all really tender, filled with reverent kisses and I love you’s and a couple of happy tears, and by the end of it both of them are completely naked and cuddled up, smiling as they look at the new matching gold rings adorning their fingers.

They both fall asleep thinking about how excited they are to spend the rest of their lives together.

[bitchiha]

✎ Hinata With a s/o Who’s Personality is the Opposite of Hers

A/N: this was a request from  a very sweet anon and I worked on it for such along time, but Tumblr did not save the post so I had to retype it.. but its okay, I am fine and here is the second attempt: 

Request: Hi! I hope you're doing well. I was wondering if you could make some relationship hcs for hinata with a s/o who's the opposite of her? My baby deserves everything and I don't see much of her and am sad bc I love her 😢 Thank you you talented person who warms my heart💿💗💿

Warning I did not proofread this <3 I am too ducking lazy bye

Gosh okay Hinata needs a s/o that’s loud and slightly obnoxious lol, like she needs that type of person to push her out of her shell. She may be shy at your advances at first, but let’s be real she actually really loves them.

99.9% of the relationship is Hinata stuttering your name. “Y-y/n!!”

She likes when you make a big stink of any small gesture she does for you. It makes her feel super confident and even if she’s walking away blushing just know that she’s going to be thinking of that moment for a good month afterwards. Like she brings you food one day after you’re training with Naruto and you’re so happy that you mow it down in like 2 seconds. Then you smother her in hugs, kisses and praise and she just turns beet red. “Y-y/n!”

Your compliments help push her out of her shell even more and she cherishes every single one. Even if your compliments are kinda shitty, it’s the thought that counts. “Wow Hinata, youre eyes look like marbles, they’re so cute.” And Hinatas blushing so fucking hard and Shino and Kiba just scratch their head like?? “Uh why did you blush at that weak ass compliment?”

You’re basically her cheerleader. Make sure to give her pep talks. Like if she’s feeling down about herself for whatever reason, you always go up to her and give her the best inspirational talk you can, throwing in all the cheesy shit you know and she��s always grateful. You’re probably half screaming the pep talk because you’re just so riled up to make your girlfriend feel energized and the effort alone is comforting. “Don’t worry about what anyone else says, I believe in you Hinata! I know you can do this.”

Whenever you two are on missions together she always makes the effort to try and show her powers off to you. She sees how protective you are of her in the village and she wants to show you that she can take care of you too. That just gives her the extra drive she needs to kick the enemies ass <3 She loves when you stare at her wide eyed and shocked after she whoops their ass. Like leaving you speechless is such an accomplishment because you hardly ever shut up. “Holy shit, Hinata!!! You’re the coolest girlfriend ever, you totally kicked their asses!”

Brag about her!!! Please just flex about your girlfriend. She does the same for you but she gets super shy afterwards. Like when she talks to Shino, Kiba and Kurenai about you she always does the little finger thing with her hands and turns beet red. Kiba loves to tease her about it when you all hang out, “Yeah, Hinata always talks about you with us. She’s always rambling about how—“ then Hinata proceeds to clamp a hand over his mouth with her eyes bulging out of her head. “K-Kiba!!”

You’re a tease so you like to get her flustered. So sometimes you join in on Kibas teasing, afterall it’s just fun and games. It’s not like Kiba wants to hurt your feelings. However, if it’s anyone else in the village they will not get the same treatment. Oh someone wants to shove Hinata as they walk past her in the village? Want to say she’s not strong? You will openly challenge them to a battle. “Hey you jerk! You wanna disrespect my girlfriend again? I’ll kick your ass right now!” And she’ll hold you back, “Y/n! It’s okay! Really you don’t need to do this.”

Honestly as you two get closer in the relationship, she starts to develop some of your mannerisms and little by little she bursts into “y/n fits.” That’s what kiba calls them. It’s basically where she does something bold and totally un-Hinata like. Like someone’s talking crap about you in the village and she goes from little shy girl to “who do you think you are talking about y/n like that?!” Kiba tells you about the fits later and you just sit back with a grin, “that’s my girl.”

She also doesn’t mind PDA — to an extent. You’re an affectionate person so you can’t help the PDA sometimes, but you know when you’re overstepping. There’s 3 levels of Shy Hinata. First level is with light PDA, like gentle little touches that you don’t even notice you’re giving her. Light brushes over her arm as you walk, or your fingers thrumming against her thigh as you two sit down at a restaurant. There’s a little brush of pink across her cheeks and you normally don’t notice it unless someone *cough cough* ( Kiba ) points it out.

The second level is with intentional touches, like hand holding, wrapping an arm around her etc. Her face turns bright red and you have to ask if it’s okay, she nods eagerly, she actually likes it a lot. It just takes her a while to adjust to it.

The third level is emergency level. Like this is just borderline she is going to evaporate. It varies from touches you didn’t mean to be so intimate, to jokingly slapping her ass when you pick her up from training. She just immediately turns red and starts stuttering and you can almost see her head overheating.

It’s kind of funny lol and you have to apologize afterwards because she’s literally over heating for five minutes afterwards. As the relationship goes on she will end up getting you back at least once, even if she’s blushing the whole time. It’s worth it though because you’re blushing just as hard at her sudden boldness.

Also loves nicknames, even the tacky ones you give her. Call her a whole list of nicknames and she adores every single one of them. For real, like you can call her: princess, peaches, love, cutie pie, sweetie, etc and they will all make her smile.

Saves like every card you give her. They’re the most extravagant yet horrendous things that ever came into creation, but she loves them all and ignores Neji’s blatant dislike for them. Like sure, they’re decked out in glitter and they look like a five year old made them, but you tried your best and the thought that you spent your time on her in such a sentimental way always makes her gush. Keeps them all in a shoe box under her bed with all the other trinkets she collects from dates and hang outs with you. She definitely wears the gifts you give her too, even if they are a little too crazy for her, she likes how humbled you get when you see her wearing them.

Also she’s 100% a pillow princess and you will not and cannot change my mind <3

[smp-live]

Man in the (Shattered) Mirror Ch. 4

AO3   First   Prev   Next

No TWs for this chapter!

Techno wasn’t too confident in this whole “resurrection” idea.

The writings they were basing themselves on were just so ancient, and vague, that it was hard to have faith in them to be accurate. And Techno, ever the pragmatic, wasn’t too fond of the idea of getting his hopes up over nothing. He’d been burned before, too many times to count.

But Phil had latched onto the idea like a lifeline, and Techno could see how it seemed to reinvigorate him. Wilbur’s death had crushed him, seemingly aged him 50 years, and he gained them all back in an instant at the prospect of being able to see his son again. Techno didn’t have the heart to crush his hopes.

Neither of them were any good at emotions, anyways, Techno being unwilling to express them and Phil dancing around the topic like he did Techno’s sword when they sparred. So he stayed silent, brought Phil meals as he sat engrossed in whatever scripture he was reading, and listened to him ramble on about ideas and theories. Sent him off with a wave and a small smile earlier this morning, despite his own doubts.

They should be going through with it right about now, he mused, glancing away from the historical text he was reading - based on facts and dates, thank you very much - and to the clock. Just past four p.m.

He should go and grab lunch; he hadn’t eaten yet today. The worn hardwood stairs creaked softly as he padded downstairs with the grace of a man who knew exactly where his body started and ended. No use sitting around wondering what was happening in a country miles away. It’s not like he would find out until Phil came back.

So, the last person he was expecting to see seated at his kitchen table was Wilbur.

He stared at Techno like a deer caught in the headlights, doe-brown eyes wide and startled. Skin peachy and flushed, dressed in that tacky 18th-century revolutionary outfit he’d seen hanging on the wall of Tommy’s room in Pogtopia, except this one wasn’t torn and bloody. No, it was crisply ironed, brass buttons gleaming in the sunlight that streamed through the blinds.

“Technoblade?” he asked, shocked, sitting ramrod straight in his chair.

“Wilbur?” Well, he supposed this answered his question about whether the resurrection had worked. Although it didn’t explain the uniform. Or why Wilbur was in the Arctic and not with the rest, in L’Manburg.

“What the fuck are you doing here? No wait,” Wilbur said, scrambling up from his chair and to the window, “where’s here?” He frowned at his surroundings, then whirled on Techno. “This isn’t L’Manberg.”

“No, it-”

“Where’d you take me?” Wilbur accused, hand twitching to his belt for a sword as he stepped towards Techno. He barely faltered when it came up empty. Techno's lips twitched into a quick smile barely tinged with pride. He’d taught him well. “You working with Dream?”

“Nah.” He reconsidered. “Or, wait-”

That was apparently the wrong answer, because Wilbur’s face contorted in rage as he pressed up to Techno. They were the same height, he mused idly, meeting his godson’s smoldering eyes easily. Despite his height and his passion, he wasn’t worried. He could take Wilbur in a fight - he’d done it a hundred times before, after all.

“Where,” Wilbur snarled, seemingly without that same sentiment, “the fuck. Are. The others. I swear, if you’ve touched a single hair on their heads, Blade-”

“Calm down, Wilbur,” Techno said, raising his hands placatingly. Wilbur’s eyes flickered to them then back to his face, squinting. “I haven’t done anything. You’re just a bit confused.”

“I-“

Techno ignored his indignant interjection. “Let’s sit, alright?” he proposed, gesturing to the table. “We can talk. Like civil people.”

Wilbur glowered, but turned and stalked to take his seat. Techno followed, and they simply sat for a few moments, stewing in an awkward silence.

Wilbur looked better than he had, when he’d last seen him. Exhausted, yes, but a more recent, surface-level tiredness, not one that had sunk its way deep into his bones. His hands were calloused, but from guitar playing and gardening rather than weapons.

“Tea?” Techno offered.

“No,” Wilbur snapped. Welp, that was his only conversation starter. What were you supposed to say when your newly-resurrected godson appeared in your kitchen? Scratch that - when he appeared to be from over a year in the past, before he had snapped and destroyed everything he’d worked for?

Luckily for the both of them, Wilbur sighed and sank his head into his hands, rubbing at his temples.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “I didn’t mean to snap - I... I’ve just been stressed, lately. With the revolution, and all.”

Techno raised an eyebrow at that. “What revolution?” Wilbur looked at him like he was dumb.

“L’Manberg? Didn’t Phil tell you? Or Dream?” he added with a sneer, and that confirmed all of Techno’s suspicions. Gods, they had really somehow managed to bring back Wilbur from over a year ago. How did they even manage that?

“First off,” Techno started, “I’m not working with Dream. I just owe him a favour.” Wilbur opened his mouth to argue but quieted down at Techno’s raised hand in warning.

“Second...” Where did he even start with this? How exactly could he explain... everything that had happened concisely?

Before he could figure out his words, the door slammed open with a gust of wind and a swirl of snow. And in walked Phil, with a hand on his hat and a a bundle clutched in his other arm. Except - that wasn’t a bundle. It was a child, a sleeping child with an all-too familiar shock of brown hair resting on Phil’s shoulder.

Techno’s stomach clenched as he turned around from shutting the door and froze, eyes drifting from Techno himself to his son across from him.

“Phil?” Wilbur - the Wilbur at the table - squeaked, eyes wide in shock. “What are you doing here? Did you- You didn’t tell me you were coming.”

Phil just stared at him for a few seconds before looking away to hang his hat. “Hey, Wil.”

“Phil?” Techno interjected, getting up. “What’s happening? Is that... Wilbur?”

“Wait- what the fuck?”

“Yeah,” Phil said, wings slumping. “Look- I’ll explain in a minute. Can you get Wil - this Wil - to bed?” he asked, turning to Techno while running a hand gently through the kid’s hair.

Techno rolled his eyes, (soft old man,) but made to take Wilbur from his father’s arms. The kid shifted as he was transferred from one grip to another, and Techno tried to shush him as he walked up the stairs, as softly as he could. He stayed quiet until he was laid in bed.

“Tec’no?” he mumbled, lifting his head and blinking at him blearily.

“Yeah, kiddo, it’s me. Now go back to sleep or your father’ll have my neck,” Techno said quietly back, tucking a blanket tightly around him - Wilbur didn’t sleep well otherwise. The kid didn’t respond, sinking back into slumber, and that was fine by him.

Now, time for answers.

As Techno padded back down the stairs, voices drifted up.

“What the fuck do you mean, it’s January?” Wilbur asked.

“I mean,” Phil answered calmly and there was a clattering of mugs, “technically you’re in the future. Not for us, but for you.”

“About a year and a half,” Techno added as he walked into the room. Both father and son turned to look at him, exhaustion on Phil’s face and distress on Wilbur’s.

“A year and a half?” he asked, so broken and scared. Then, strengthening himself up from the moment of vulnerability, “did we win? The war, I mean.”

“Yes,” Phil said, sitting down and pushing a mug of steaming tea in front of Wilbur and one for Techno, “you did.” Wilbur’s ecstatic grin was enough to make Techno take a sip of his tea to hide his own smile. His godson’s joy had always been contagious.

“We won? We won! That’s bloody fantastic!” He nearly leapt out of his chair in excitement. “Tell me- how was it? How long did it take? Can we go see - actually, scratch that - why are we not in L’Manberg now?”

“Wil, mate,” Phil started, then sighed, wings slumping down, “a- a lot happened between then and now, and...” He trailed off, unwilling to voice it. So Techno decided to make his life a little bit easier.

“You died,” he said simply.

“I- what?”

“You died.”

“All three times?”

“Mm-hm.” Techno nodded, taking another sip from his mug. Wilbur just gaped, speechless for once in his life at the news.

“We tried to resurrect you,” Phil said, finding his voice again. “It... kinda worked? I mean,” he gestured at the Wilbur across the table, “case in point. But... Ghostbur’s still around. And there’s not just you - the Wilbur upstairs came back, too, and,” his voice cracked as he locked eyes with Techno, “Wil right before he died.”

“Oh,” Techno said. That... wasn’t good. Not for the server, finally at peace with L’Manburg gone, and not for Phil.

Wilbur before he died had been a destructive force of chaos, uncaring of who or what he hurt as he spiraled. Sure, it had helped Techno, as their goals at the time had lined up, but now? He just wanted to be at peace in his home in the arctic. Farm a little, maybe read some books.

If he was back, and in that same state of mind, well... Techno shuddered to think of what he might do to that peace.

Wilbur - Wilbur across the table - frowned, eyes flitting from one to the other. “Care to explain?”

“I’d rather not,” Phil said, “Not right now. We have no reason to believe it’s only you three that came back, and I- I don’t want to have to explain everything more than once.”

Wilbur considered that for a few seconds, head tilted like he always did when he was deep in thought. “Fair enough.”

“Besides,” Phil continued, “I’d rather someone else explain. I don’t know the whole story. You were a bit sporadic in your letters, mate.”

Wilbur winced apologetically. “Sorry.”

“Eh,” Phil waved a hand around as if to brush it away, “it’s fine. Anyways, we agreed to meet at Eret’s castle tomorrow to discuss.”

“Wait - castle? Why does Eret have a castle?” Wilbur asked. “Isn’t he a part of L’Manberg?” Oh, this wasn’t good.

“Wil,” Phil started, sympathetic, then seemed to think better of it. “nevermind. For tomorrow.”

“For tomorrow,” Wilbur echoed. “Right.”

He looked lost, hands cupped around his steaming mug of tea that clouded up the brass buttons adorning his uniform, in much the same way his eyes clouded as they stared blankly at the cabinets. Lost as in his whole world had been uprooted in just a few instants.

Which was fair; this was a lot to take in, even for Techno, and he wasn’t the one who found himself in the future where he was supposedly dead.

“Alright,” he said, getting up with a clap of his hands. That was enough emotional conversation for today. “Wilbur, I have a book on historical politics you might be interested in? To distract yourself for now?”

That seemed to jolt his godson out of his state, the life returning to his eyes. “Y-yes, of course,” he stammered out, following Techno to his feet. “You know me so well, Blade.”

Techno rolled his eyes as he clapped Phil on the shoulder. “You’re welcome to come join us,” he told him. Phil just nodded tightly with a wan smile, hands gripping his mug. He wouldn’t be, then.

“Suit yourself,” he said, then led Wilbur upstairs to his room.

-

If someone were to ask Fundy how he was feeling on a scale of 1-10, he’d answer a solid two. Luckily for his pride, though, nobody cared about him enough to ask.

The root of the problem was, of course, Wilbur - when was it not? His father had been the cause of pretty much every bad thing in his life ever since he’d decided to start that Prime-forsaken country. Ever since he’d gone and offed himself on a diamond sword.

He kind of mostly wanted to avoid thinking about Wilbur entirely, if he was completely honest. But both Wilbur’s ghost and Phil wanted him to be resurrected, and so he found himself going along with it. He figured he could make sure his quote-unquote father came back, didn’t immediately ruin everything, and then fuck off and never think about him again.

Except, of course that’s not what happened.

No, of course Wilbur had to fuck up something as simple as coming back to life. He just had to somehow split into different versions of himself. Because of course.

And now, there was an all-too-familiar-looking shape huddled at the end of his docks, the one place he felt at home.

He was wearing a clean white tee with a familiar-looking black cardigan thrown overtop. His feet dangled just above the water, boots shucked onto the planks next to him. Fingers tapped out a rhythm at his side as he stared out over the horizon.

Fundy recognized the melody, of course he did. An old sea shanty his father had twisted into a lullaby he’d sang every night until Fundy protested with a whined, “I’m too old, dad, stop.” He sometimes still found himself humming it, though most of the words had slipped his mind over time, replaced with more important things such as swordfighting stances, cyphers, and how to make sure a drunk man didn’t die choking on his own vomit.

Gravel crunched under Fundy’s boot as he took an involuntary step forward. The tapping stopped. Wilbur slowly turned around, both freezing as they locked eyes.

“Fundy?” his father choked out with glistening eyes. Fundy sighed.

“Hi, Wil.”

“You’re- you’re so big!” Wilbur got to his feet, a beaming smile on his face, and stumbled towards Fundy. He wanted nothing more than to run, to scream get the fuck away from me, to collapse and cry into his father’s arms. Instead, he stayed stock still.

Wilbur took his face in his hands, cradling it gently as he always did. His hand was soft and warm, gentle calluses from hours spent holding a pen or a guitar instead of a sword. Fundy had to swallow down a lump in his throat; it had been easier to ignore how much he missed this when he wasn’t staring it in the face.

But he couldn’t have this, this softness with his once-family. He’d disowned Wilbur, and his ex-father had disowned him back. Had looked his son-in-no-more-than-blood in the eyes and said, with complete honesty, “I despise you.”

That wasn’t this Wilbur, though, so maybe he could allow himself to pretend, for a bit. This Wilbur looked younger. Face rounder, limbs ganglier, eyebags less deep. Stress lines and signs of early greying gone. Little details Fundy wouldn’t even have noticed had he not just seen an older version of him.

He pulled away suddenly, eyes burning with tears, and Wilbur let him go, a concerned expression on his face. Always so fucking concerned. Until it didn’t benefit him anymore.

“Fundy? What- what’s wrong?” he asked, tilting his head slightly.

“Fuck off,” he muttered, rubbing furiously at his eyes with his sleeve. “’m fine.”

“You’re crying-”

“I said I’m fine.” Why wouldn’t he drop it?

“Son-”

“Don’t fucking call me that.” Fundy snapped, and Wilbur took a shocked step back. “You lost the right to call me that a long time ago.”

“Fundy...” Wilbur stared at him, studying, clearly trying to piece together what he could’ve done from the look on his fox-face. Joke’s on him, he’d have to actually know Fundy in order to read him, and nobody bothered to care enough to get to that point. Wilbur of all people definitely didn’t. “What happened?”

"You died,” Fundy said bluntly. He sure as fuck wouldn’t try and soften the blow for his father. “We tried to resurrect you, and you fucked it up. Now, you’re here.” He waved his arm around them. “Welcome back, I guess.”

Wilbur gaped at him. “I- I died?” he asked, breathless.

Fundy nodded sharply. “Yup. Few months ago. Now, if you don’t mind me, I’ll be off.”

“Fundy, wait-” Frantic footsteps sounded on the dock behind him.

“Fuck off." Fundy kept stalking away.

“No, Fundy, please-”

“What?” He whirled around, snarling. “What do you want, old man?”

“Old man?” Wilbur paused, amused smile on his face. “Fundy, I’m barely nineteen.”

Fundy’s blood froze, (his father was the same age as him,) but he whirled back around and kept walking. “Not to me, you aren’t.”

“I don’t have anywhere to stay,” Wilbur all-but-whispered. Fundy didn’t even turn around, this time.

“Sucks to be you. Now stay the fuck away from me.”

[tearlessrain]

30 questions tag game

Tagged by: @mercurypilgrim (thanks!)

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 5 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better.

Name/nickname: I’ve been going by tearless/tearlessrain for so long that a friend once called me that in person and I did not notice that it wasn’t my name until they said something. but I also have a lot of other names, only two of which have legal relevance.

Gender: male

Star sign: virgo, but I’ve been told by the local astrology gays that I’m also an aquarius moon and that it “explains a lot”

Height: 5′2

Birthday: a secret. I do not like being the center of attention.

Time: it’s like 3:40am. I will experience deep regret tomorrow, and I will learn nothing from this.

Favorite bands: queen feels like a cop out but like I’m never really not in the mood to listen to queen. linkin park, unironically. and all the different permutations of the crosby/stills/nash/young/simon/garfunkle cloud.

A few I am currently listening to, though: I can’t really call out specific bands/artists because I’m mostly listening to my oc playlists lately (I literally can’t stay in a bad mood listening to riska’s playlist and that’s just the energy I need in my life right now).

Favorite solo artists: (all together now) david bowie. also hozier and joni mitchell.

Song stuck in my head: O Come All Ye Faithful, in latin, for some fucking reason. it’s been there for days. send help.

Last movie: Kung Fu Panda, discord server was having a movie night.

Last show: WandaVision but I’m behind on it (loved the first two episodes but now I can feel the Marvel-ness looming again and I dread it)

When did I create this blog: god I don’t even remember, I’ve been here since the first age and never changed accounts/urls so like. around ten years now I think.

What do I post: whatever the hell passes through my brain from moment to moment, I can’t believe anyone follows me. lately a lot of rambling about my swtor ocs, sometimes it’s tolkien/silmarillion content, sometimes I liveblog terrible movies on purpose, sometimes it’s isaac asimov hours, sometimes just shitposting or unsolicited opinions about completely random things I’m not qualified to talk about. the only thing I can be relied on to provide is reblogs of ocean and horse photos, but not on any kind of consistent schedule.

Last thing googled: celtic invasion of portugal. I got slightly sidetracked from something else I was doing.

Other blogs: I’ve got art over at @tearlessrainart, horny art over at @a-world-of-osha-violations, and a little pile of extremely specific sideblogs I rarely use.

Do I get asks: not often, but those I do get are appreciated. except you, ray bans bot. I don’t appreciate you.

Why I chose my url: I originally used it as a deviantart handle (still there) because it wasn’t taken and I liked the overall way it sounded, and kept it because it’s rarely taken anywhere. and now it’s been ten years so like it’s stuck at this point.

Following: 305

Followers: 1392 which is far more than I deserve given my wildly inaccessible blogging style

Average hours of sleep: 7-8 hours usually but my actual sleep schedule skews late. I’ve never been one of those people who can skate by on 5 hours and be functional, if I get less than 6 hours I am absolutely useless and was that way even in high school/college when everyone else was pulling all nighters and shit.

Lucky number: I honestly have never understood lucky numbers, and how much I like any given number is solely dependent on how appealing its colors are according to my synesthesia. if anyone’s wondering, 420 is a hideously tacky blue/orange clusterfuck, but 69 is pleasantly greyscale.

Instruments: I play the flute, in that I own a flute that I was pretty good at playing in high school and can, if I choose, still play notes on it. I also own a melodica but I cannot play it, which to be clear does not stop me from playing it.

What am I wearing: pajama pants and a sith cloak. which sounds like a joke but I do actually own a set of sith robes and the cloak happens to be warm and very comfortable so I just kinda. wear it around the house sometimes in the winter.

Dream job: ornamental lighthouse hermit who may or may not be a wizard.

more realistically though I’m hoping to go into sfx makeup and cosmetology (I was like a week away from getting my license when the apocalypse hit)

Dream trip: I’d love to visit australia and new zealand, would also very much like to go back to scotland and possibly just not leave scotland.

Favorite food: sushi, specifically good salmon nigiri. god it’s so good. smeagol was right.

Nationality: regrettably, american.

Favorite song: god I have no idea. uh. I really like the boy in the bubble by paul simon. something about the visuals in that song speak to me.

Last book read: rereading The Robots of Dawn by Isaac Asimov, which is a terrible book that I nonetheless subject myself to periodically because I like all the books around it a lot. I need to start on Robots and Empire but shit’s been going down recently so I haven’t been reading much.

Top three fictional universes I’d like to live in:  

okay LIVE IN is a very different question from “universes I think are neat” because like. I love the whole thing firefly has going on but I wouldn’t survive it for more than five minutes. so with that in mind:

1. middle earth but like, the shire during the third age specifically.

2. I think I would enjoy being a legend of zelda npc. I could just be a weird little potion seller who lives in a tree or something. or maybe an inexplicably sexy fish man. or better yet, the inexplicably sexy fish man’s husband, who sells potions. yeah I’ve got my fictional life here completely figured out now, this is good. I would also own an extremely chonky horse.

3. one of the ones I made up, specifically the one that involves a lot of gryphons and interdimensional bullshit. more specifically the origin universe of said gryphons, which exists at the heart of an extremely complicated multiverse that includes both earth and at least one fantasy world but is part of neither. anyway it’s a nice place.

Tagging: @raemanzu @sith-nb @vampiraptor @nyriad @crypticspren

(only if you want to of course)

[flipflap-flipflap]

Long post where I ramble about my transition.  Not that I can imagine anyone doing so, but please do not reblog.

Idr if I already made a post about this but I restarted my transition after something like 7 or 8 years hiatus.  Take my advice, don’t try to transition during college.  It might seem like the ideal time, out of your parents’ eyes and in a broadly accepting environment with a lot of anonymity, but...don’t.  Unless you’re a genius and breezing through college like it’s nothing, it’s going to be way too much anxiety piled on top of you.  I burned out hard.  So hard that I’m only just now restarting my transition, almost a decade later, and under a new name to entirely divorce myself from that first experience.

That’s not to say I haven’t been dysphoric as all hell this whole time.  Getting deadnamed/misgendered by friends, family and coworkers and having no excuse to correct it has probably been the hardest part.  Over the past year or two I’ve strayed into nonbinary territory, and folks calling me by my username (including irl friends online) and using they/them pronouns has really helped alleviate my dysphoria.  And I think that’s what gave me the motivation boost to jump back into my bona fide mtf transition.

I only just got on hrt back in early March, so not a whole lot has changed yet.  The only big surprise so far has been that my belly fat evaporated before I even realized it.  I’ve thankfully got a pretty naturally feminine body, but I’ve always had a noticeable belly bulge for someone as otherwise skinny as me, but now it’s almost completely flat.  I have started working out, but not intensely enough or for long enough to be seeing such drastic results so soon.  So I assume I have the hormones to thank for that.

I should probably be documenting my boob growth, but I uh, don’t really care?  I mean, I want boobs, hell yeah, but they’ll get here when they get here.  Not like I could get implants if I wanted them till like, 18 months or something like that anyway.  For now, after a month and a half, I’m just happy that my boobs are grown enough that bras stay in place.

My big project right now is voice.  I’m not really the type to practice with people (not just with this, I couldn’t even do group studying back in school).  I just hate people seeing that I’m a work in progress, y’know?  So what I’ve been doing in the meantime is recording myself while I read a book aloud.  The book I more or less randomly chose is one that I bought on a whim and then never read: The Girl from Shadow Springs, by Ellie Cypher.  It’s an okay book, but there's two things that I really like about my choice here: a female protagonist who is also our narrator, and a fair amount of dialogue that almost always is one female and one male.  Ngl, most of my fun comes from dropping in and out of female voice to do the male dialogue lines.  I love hearing it on the playback.  The vocal acrobatics are NOT easy, and probably not helpful, but they are fun.

I’m saving all my recordings because I have no reason not to.  I’ll probably never revisit them (just like I doubt I’d look at boob growth references), but recordings actually have some potential to be handy down the road.

The bane of my life though, as always, is none other than my neck.  I’ve always had trouble shaving it, and it hasn’t gotten any better.  It’s the one and only part of my body I struggle to shave.  Face?  Fine.  Armpits?  Fine.  Crotch?  Fine.  Neck?  A fucking Christmas tree.  It irritates after every shave, especially if I try shaving more than once a week.  Daily?  It looks like I took sandpaper to it.  I moisturize, exfoliate, use a sensitive skin shaving cream, a nice aftershave balm, and fresh razors, and still I light up.  The merest touch of the razor to the skin, even before swiping, burns like hell.  And I can’t even get a close shave out of it! 

I’m going to be starting laser hair removal because duh, but I can’t really start that until after I move, which will be in late May at the earliest and August/September at the latest.  Until then, makeup is my one and only ally in this cruel world.  I should see a dermatologist like a responsible adult, but whoever accuses me of being that is a fool.

I don’t think I’ll bother publicly transitioning at work, for a few reasons.  First, I plan on leaving as soon as I find a job out of state, so why bother.  Second, I have a coworker who is the most intoxicatingly supportive person I have ever met.  I cannot underscore how little I want to hear him saying he’s cheering me on while doing a stupid little clap or something tacky like that.  I think I’d resort to violence.  Third, we’re all remote anyway so why bother with the effort?  I go into the office once a week where I see a whopping two people.  And fourth, I'm not satisfied with how my voice passes, and like I said, I don’t like people seeing a work in progress.  Idk, maybe once I’m a bit more confident in my voice (namely, consistency) and once I figure out how to conceal my big crybaby neck I’ll just casually start going in as a woman.  We’ll see.

Anyway that’s the sum of my life right now.  Uh, welcome to it?

[banashee]

 A conversation long overdue

 To her credit, Natasha is patient as she is listening to her best friend rambling over the phone. She doesn’t rush or interrupt and it may or may not be because he’s still hungover and therefore a lot more whiny than usual. She doesn't feel like dealing with that.

 It also might be because instead of cracking puns or starting out with one of his god awful phone greetings (“Barton Morgue,      you stab     '      em we     slab '      em    , got a new one?”) that make her roll her eyes hard enough to spin in circles, when Natasha answers her phone the first thing she can hear is Clint sighing dramatically and then exclaiming,

 “Please be nice. I’m dumb.”

 “I’m always nice. Besides, I'm afraid you'll have to be a little more specific than that."

 When Clint sighs pitifully and then takes a deep breath to start talking, Natasha already regrets asking.

 But she listens patiently and for long enough to start and finish painting her nails in the process.

 She listens to Clint ramble about stupid feelings, casual hookup's that haven't felt casual in forever.

 She listens to him ramble about a weekend in Vegas and a drunken night out that neither he or Tony actually remembers and so far, it sure sounds like something these two doofuses she calls her friends would do.

 That is until a moment after, and the sound of Clints head colliding with a wooden surface - over a decade of knowing him tells her that the real catcher is about to come - her mind jumps to several possible conclusions and they're all kinda cliché but. She's right.

 What the hell, Clint?

 After he's finished his long winded ramble, Natasha pours herself a glass of vodka, swallows it in one go and finally answers.

 "So, just so I get this straight. You two didn't manage to have an actual talk about your feelings in well over a year, and instead you got drunk and got married in a tacky Las Vegas wedding chapel with some dude in a Elvis costume officiating it, only to wake up the next day with no idea how that even happened?“

 Clint thumps his head onto a table again - he'll lose plenty of braincells on this trip, it seems.

 "Well, yeah." A beat of silence. "It wasn't even a      good     Elvis." he complains, as if that is the real tragedy here.

 Natasha laughs. Hard. And loud.

 Only very few instances of that happening have been witnessed by anyone currently alive - it's always humbling, because for one, it shows that the Black Widow is human after all, while on the other hand, it usually means that somebody has done something incredibly stupid. Which is probably the reason that it’s mostly Clint who causes her to laugh like that. It’s just another part of their experience as platonic life partners.

 “Okay, but have you talked       now    ?” Natasha asks, when she’s got a grip on herself again, still grinning and wiping amused tears from her eye and pouring another glass of vodka. She figures she might as well.

 “I mean, we were gonna. But alcohol is evil. We had dinner slash breakfast slash whatever, found the photos from last night that Tony has on his phone and had a good laugh. Then we ended up fucking again and well, he’s asleep at the moment.”

 Clint sounds like he’s actually thinking about how to go about this - as much as his love life resembles a dumpster fire sometimes, this is something different, drunken Vegas shenanigans aside -  it is clearly important to him.

 “Alright, then go to sleep and sober up. You two will have to have this conversation eventually.”

 “Yeah, I know. Thanks, Tasha.”

 They hang up on that - saying “goodbye” is just not their thing.

 Natasha sighs, and about 2000 miles away, Clint does the same, mussing up the back of his hair in the process. She’s right tho - she always is, so what else is new. He gets up from the couch, leaving his phone there and then he quietly walks over to the bedroom and crawls back under the blankets, careful not to wake Tony.

 He doesn’t wake up, but he turns briefly to cuddle up close to Clint once he’s back in bed, arms and legs wrapped around him like an octopus.

 It feels familiar and just right - Clint feels something ease in his chest as he hugs back while falling asleep.

 They will have this long overdue talk - eventually. For now though, the bed is warm and the company is good and neither of the two sees a need to move anytime soon.

 When they wake up in the morning, they do so with heads that are no longer clouded from a nasty hangover and to the sound of pouring rain outside.

 It’s comfortable and cozy, and they start the day with lazy kisses and wandering hands in bed, moving on to the shower later.

 By the time they are dressed and on the couch, cradling mugs of steaming hot coffee in their hands, the time feels right.

 Clint is still mulling over in his head how to start this, but Tony actually saves him the trouble.

 “So, what do you think? There is still time to annul the whole thing if you want, but, uh. We could, you know, just go for it and see where it gets us?”

 He sounds suspiciously casual when he talks about the annulation, but there is something soft and hopeful in his eyes when he offers the option of staying together.  

 Clint doesn’t even think when he answers, because his heart has already made this decision, long before they even ended up here in this hotel room.

 “Yeah, okay. let’s go for it. I, uh, I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.” He reaches out with one hand, and Tony takes it. He smiles at him, happy and content and with a giant weight falling off of his chest.

 Their hands fit together perfectly in the way they’re intertwined, and so does the rest of them as they kiss. It’s far from the first time, but it still feels like an entirely new experience.

 *+~

 Prompt No. 45: Please be nice. I’m dumb.

[radramblog]

Pink Lemonade: Not too sweet, not too sour.

(I think I’m brave enough to try some of that.)

Pink Lemonade is a 2014 album by Melbourne prog outfit Closure in Moscow and is one of the most banging’ albums in my collection. It sets out to have a good time and a good time it has, being probably the most consistently fun to sing along to of the albums I’ve tried to do that with. It also tells a pretty bizarre story, which between the salad of the lyrics, the rapid delivery, and sheer esoterica is pretty hard to follow- as such I’ll be explaining it as I go through this review. The clearest explanation of the plot is available in this article written by the band’s vocalist, and so a lot of what I’m saying is going to be coming from that. I’d recommend listening to it yourself, though, maybe even before reading on, if only so you can be as awed and confused as I was the first time around.

1. The Fool

We open on nature noises as a slow meandering line plays before suddenly being interrupted by a record distortion and a burst of energetic guitars and a quick beat, followed by the first lines of the song and what the fuck is he saying? Yeah, get used to that, that’s what this whole thing is like. Strap in.

The playful delivery of the second verse (“It’s a new day for the Fool today…”) had me hooked, with the backup vocals solidifying that position- its just a style that really appeals to me. The song doesn’t last much longer beyond that opening, because that’s just what it is- an introduction, a prologue, introducing the album’s style, energy, and protagonist.

Oh, speaking of. The Fool is our main character, and he’s who this track is about- a pleasure-seeker lost and adrift doing his own horseshit, and we’re going to watch him try(yyyyyyyYYYYYyyyyyyyyyyyy) to find his next fix- a fast track no fuss path to enlightenment.

2. Pink Lemonade

I’d argue this is the first real song of the album, considering how brief The Fool is. While The Fool introduced the off-kilter verses of the album, the album’s title song introduces the punchy choruses, with vocals going in unexpected directions and their impact coinciding with the beginnings of technical and fluid riffs. The first chorus (actually maybe the only one uhhh) breaks off with a hard pause, and we’re back in the slow build of a new, chiller verse. There’s a contrast here- The Alchemist (bloke on the cover!) offering this miracle brew, this psychedelic Pink Lemonade that’s the cheat way to heaven on earth, and the Fool just begging for it and then losing his mind as the drugs take effect and it’s not quite what he was expecting. This build climaxes as the Alchemist speaks again, voice editing simulating the effects the Lemonade is having on the Alchemist’s mind, as he pours this wicked elixir once more and reinforces quite explicitly that he doesn’t fuck around. As the music cuts back, it’s the Fool who’s finding out, as he just says a bunch of words that I don’t really get- but we hear backing vocals teasing, with the album’s first mention of the Brahmatron (we’ll get to it) The song keeps going as this motherfucker just keeps tripping- allegedly he’s grappling with extradimensional shit, you know how it is. This song fucks, by the way. It’s a thrill ride, never going in the same direction twice, and only stopping to start again until its final, bitter end.

The track on the album isn’t over, though, and here’s my first real criticism, though its more of a meta thing on albums in general. You get a lot of albums where there are additional non-song bits strapped to the start and end, typically with concept and story albums, and I just wish these would be delineated as separate tracks on the album if they’re as long as this one is. When Pink Lemonade comes up on shuffle, I don’t reaaaally want to get halfway seduced before moving on to the next song, especially if I’m not the only one listening to it.

Oh yeah, that’s what is happening, by the way. After the Fool is done tripping, he awakens in an alleyway to a voice (officially named the Tacky Ornamental Slut, ok, sure) in his head, leading him to her performance at a jazz club that is extremely forward and direct. This little swaggering, jazzy interlude (featuring guest vocals and “general insidious sauciness” by Kitty Hart who’s doing a lovely job) leads directly into and continues in the next track, as Weird Dimensional Shit happens to the Fool and by the sounds of things, either he or she is glitching through reality.

3. Neoprene Byzantine

The explosion of noise that is the first second of Neoprene Byzantine is the first thing I heard of this album, as it came up on one of Spotify’s Recommended playlists, and I’m glad I went back to figure out what the hell was going on here. Suddenly, our tempting voice has turned accusatory, essentially asking “oh, wait, you were actually into that?”, and offering the songs title character, Verina (a name never actually stated in the lyrics) to satisfy the Fool’s apparent needs. There is so much energy in this opening, essentially being *fancy guitar noodling* *sassy lyrics over a snare roll* *more guitar noodling* until it breaks, and Kitty exists the record hitting a high note that took me way too long to realise was a euphemism for cunnilingus. Exquisite. (I only realised when writing this and looking at the lyrics that this isn’t the first time that subject comes up on the album, since one of the lyrics I never got on The Fool was apparently “cunt-licking”. Earning that explicit label, I see.)

The rest of the plot of the song is basically just about Verina, a time-travelling plastic-surgery-covered literal Byzantine empress whom the Fool enters a torrid relationship with. The chorus is so much fun to belt along to, carried by the smooth guitar lines that don’t really explode like the opening does- that gets saved for part of the second verse, but we’ll get to that. The verses are also a lot of fun, with the first spending a lot of time as this cut back percussion-and-vocals bit, and when the other instruments do return the lyrics spend a lot of time with little asides (like these bits in brackets what I’m doing). The second verse on the other hand is has the vocals build along with psychedelic guitars until we are SUDDENLY YELLING, finishing with a steady fall back to normal for the final verse. The only reason I’d say they’re any less fun than the chorus is because the lyrics are fast so its real hard to keep up sometimes- kudos to the performer for nailing that.

Neoprene Byzantine is probably my favourite song on the album, and a lot of that is for similar reasons as Pink Lemonade- the energy all over the place, the different styles of vocals used, basically it has big ADHD energy, and I can appreciate that. It might literally be that this song resonates with me better only because of the better chorus, and me having a bad habit of saying (or singing) rude things with a straight face.

4. Seeds of Gold

Where Pink Lemonade and Neoprene Byzantine are chaotic and energetic, Seeds of Gold is a groovy, very danceable little tune. I don’t have as much to say as a result- its actually probably my next favourite after Neoprene Byzantine, but there isn’t as much to explain music-wise or plot-wise. The bass is grooving, and the little glitchlike noises keep it from being so smooth it feels out of place, reminding you that, yeah, this is still a track from Pink Lemonade. It’s probably the song most capable of standing on its own without the rest of the album, considering its meaning and non-reliance on themes or interstitials. That’s probably why it got a (very stylish) music video of its own.

Plot wise, Seeds of Gold depicts a more frustrated and melancholic story than its glittering guitars suggest- it’s about the ending of The Fool and Verina’s relationship, with him having no use for her anymore, his callousness turning to resentment in her mind, and he’s unwilling to take the blame for it.

5. That Brahmatron Song

Here’s where shit gets weird again.

That Brahmatron Song is the existential lament of the Fool as he discovers the truth of reality, the nature of the Brahmatron, and falls again through reality.

Like with Pink Lemonade, I’d argue this would have been better split off into two tracks, with the first half sounding completely different to the second- though at least the two are a little better connected sonically this time, in my opinion. After a mishearing of the lyrics, I can never imagine the chorus of That Brahmatron Song as anything but a particularly loud, drunken campfire tune, sung with tears in one’s eyes and a warmth in one’s heart (whether it be from the fire, the alcohol, or the camaraderie). And while that doesn’t actually fit the lyrics as the truly are, it’s a nice sentiment I’ve stuck to and kind of want to do in real life at some point.

The lyrics of this song are something that I just cannot connect to what the plot is supposed to be. Like, I get the realisation the Fool makes, but I don’t get how he’s supposed to have gotten there- the lines are just to esoteric. This is not to say it’s a bad song or anything- not as good as the previous three, but still great on its own measure- but it leaves me a bit puzzled.

The plot dives into its most psychedelic moments, as the Fool, through…some means… discovers the nature of the universe as the Brahmatron- the resonance and vibrations that make up reality as a whole. And as he fucks around with it, he gets sucked into it, leading to the second half of the song. The first half ends like a film projector being abruptly shut off, as the yawning void of the universe makes itself heard through atmospheric noise, slowly rising into a dramatic, unsettling beat. The vocals return with a transcendent BRAAAAAAAAHMATROOOOOON echoing through the noise, soon replaced by the dramatic beat continuing under what is presumably the Fool’s screaming rambles, filtered as though through a shitty radio. Guitar noodling begins, a solo lasting until the loud existential vocals come in again. Alarms blare as the raving gets more desperate, the solo restarts, and the dramatic percussion keeps going through it all. It’s almost akin to a twisted marching beat, eventually falling partially away as actual radio chatter is heard from some military type what the fuck? And then vintage video-gamey gunfire and explosions as the military dude says to fire and then someone’s really sexual moans and then it’s just over.

I don’t think I can put into words the experience that section of the song is, though I guess that’s me trying. It’s nonsensical and a little scary, but it’s a good time.

As the Fool tumbles through reality, he sees the apex, the centre of the Brahmatron, learning that it is neither malevolent nor benevolent, yawning of all possibilities and connecting to different realities. The Fool, frightened by the existential idea that all possibilities existing makes free will an illusion, desperately seeks a way out, finding a tendril leading to the forest he first met the Alchemist and diving right into that reality. It’s clearly a bit fucky, as we can assume from the military noises, but it’s familiar, and he needs that right now.

But there’s always a twist. We’ll get to the twist a later date, as at this point, I’m at almost 2,000 words and around halfway through the album. Stay tuned for Part 2.

[pynkhues]

I’m just here to say I love all of your fic and ask what might be your next update? 🙂

Thank you so much! I’m hoping to get at least one thing up by the end of this week? My office is shutting down tomorrow for the quarantine - so that day will be busy, but the rest of the week should be pretty quiet, hopefully giving me lots of time to write. 

My head’s been totally consumed with this s3 fic though right now where Beth and Rio do a job together and then bone in his new car, haha, so that’ll probably be the thing that goes up? (Although I’m aiming for the last part of the porn!AU soon too). 

Anyway, I know I posted a bit of this earlier in the week, but if you like, you can have the full first scene of the s3 fic!

I hope you like it!

Weird thingis, the place smells like her.

He’d thoughtit the first time he’d stepped through the door, the counterfeit note uncurlinglike a promise in his pocket; the ugly-ass white curtains that looked straightoutta his abuela’s house already drawn.

He can’teven really explain what the smell is, wouldn’t know how to describe itif somebody asked – something a little too sweet, but it ain’t like perfume,ain’t like fresh baked cookies or pie or nothin’ neither, and it ain’t quitelike a flower, not that he makes a habit of going around smelling the roses andwhatnot, but he’s got sisters, and Rhea used to love getting them back when sheused to love him.

Nah, itain’t anything so easy to pin down – not that anything with Elizabeth ever hasbeen.  

Back before- - well, just before, he used to think maybe it was some lotion orshampoo or something. Didn’t smell like a flower because it must have been someflower imitation, essence of whatever, something smelled once by somebody forreal and then broken down in a lab in an effort to recreate it. A bottled upmemory, some Frankenstein’d recreation of something that smelt good to somebodyonce.

Somethingnot cheap, but inexpensive, probably picked up at the drug store whileshe bought up toothpaste and diapers, toilet paper and aspirin, somethingslathered on her skin after her shower but before bed, something that’d she’dsoak in overnight, but still - -

Somethingjust on her skin.

Because thething is, now he knows that ain’t it. Knows it, because she tastes like it too.

Fuck, knowsexactly how deep inside her that taste goes.

Knows itstarts on the inside, whatever it is.

Remembers ittoo-sweet on his tongue for days after she kicked him out of her bed.

And shit, itain’t something he’s had any time recent, but still – the smell in the airdon’t just hit his nose right now, it coats his teeth.

The fact ofit all is enough to make him drum his fingers on the counter, right beside thecash registers, enough to make his jaw rock, impatient, as he watches Elizabethhelp a customer pick out a card, her movements stiff since the moment she sawhim walk in, and on anyone else that would feel like a win, but on her he knowsit ain’t one. Ain’t fear or discomfort but anger, simmering just beneath herskin.

Enough of itapparently to make her take her time, draw it out, leave him waiting longer,and he’s of half a mind to go over and get her fussin’ and flusterin’, when thecustomer finally decides on which bit of folded cardboard she wants to go with thebox of decorative plates in her hand and asks and you gift wrap, right?

And it’salmost impressive, how Elizabeth can cross the store swapping small talk withthis twenty-something (who’s all fuckin’ pep and Invisalign braces), can feel hiseyes on her, must know he’s practically draped across the counter, and not somuch as glance at him.

“Do youthink the gold wrapping paper is too much?” the girl trills. “I don’t want itto look like I’m trying too hard.”

“No suchthing when it comes to presentation,” Elizabeth replies, and he knows her wellenough to know her voice is a little tight, just because he knows what itsounds like when it ain’t, and he smiles at her, sharkish, as she rounds the counter,until all that’s left between them is the wooden frame of the thing.

She rings upthe sale while the girl natters about somethin’ or other, the ancient littlemachine beneath them all choking out a receipt as Elizabeth starts grabbingtogether wrapping paper and ribbons of gauzy tulle and metallic bands thatcatch the light and blink gold. It’s tacky as fuck, but the thing is, he kindalikes watching her work with her hands. Likes it when she’s workin’ that printer,slicing his money, likes it when she’s fiddling and fussing and straighteningthings out, reminds him of them on his - -

Nuh.

Not that.  

He pushes hisarm a little harder against the counter edge, not enough that she’ll notice,and sucks on his teeth, but shit, there’s that taste again, and he should lookaway, should stop watching her pale hands fumble with the handle of some bigass craft scissors, her narrow fingers small there – thinner than the blades,and just - - something in him twitches.

The customer’scell pings, and it’s enough to make him glance over, just in time to see thegirl quickly look away from him, and huh, he thinks, tilting his body away fromElizabeth and towards the girl instead. It’s almost too easy, to take her in,all frizzy, mouse-brown hair and bright green eyes, pink cheeks. She looks alittle curious, a little embarrassed, and he softens out a grin, nodding hishead towards the card in her hands.

“Birthday?”he guesses, and she blinks, surprised, before flushing a little.

“Engagementparty,” she replies, and Rio taps his knuckles down on the counter, all damn,so close, feeling something in him sharpen in satisfaction, when he feelsElizabeth’s gaze finally dart over to him.

“I don’teven want to go,” the girl adds, rolling her eyes in quasi amusement. “I justwork with her, but the whole office is going, so it’s like, become this bigdeal.”

Rio hums incommiseration.

“Things wedo for work, huh?”

And shit,ain’t that why he’s here tonight? Briefly, his thoughts tangle with theprospect of what he’s got to do, annoyance flaring with even the prospect ofthis fucking thing, but it’s stifled when the girl looks at him in surprise.

“Do you workhere too?” she asks, voice all loaded up with curiosity, and Rio grins, swayinga little as Elizabeth turns on the spot to grab one of the ribbons behind her,spin back, make jerky, awkward work of tying the bow.

“Somethin’like that.”

Behind him,the metallic schink of the scissors on the ribbon sounds louder in hisear, the force of the cut harsher than it needs to be, and Rio grins before hecan help it, just real fuckin’ delighted at the thought. Pissin’ her off - - itain’t like anything else.

“Do I get toask now?”

Rio blinks,pops an eyebrow as the girl flushes a little beneath the boldness of her ownquestion, and it reminds him of Elizabeth way back when, blinking those bambieyes of hers beneath the Cloud 9 store fluorescents. When that desperate edgeto her hadn’t been quite so shadowed, and huh, he tilts back towards the girl,softens his smile, waves a hand out like be my guest.

She sways onthe spot, pink in delight, bites her lip, and beside them, the wrapping papercrinkles roughly as Elizabeth’s pale hands tie bows.

“I’m goingto go with owner, I think.”

Rio laughs,twisting his head to find Elizabeth staring at him, unimpressed, before he swingseasily back to the girl.

“Got it inone, sweetheart.”

It’s enoughto make her flush all over, pleased, and Elizabeth to pick up the pace on hergift wrapping, finally finishing it and thrusting it into a bag, passing it on overas the girl starts rambling about a prize, and she’s talkin’ to him, but he don’treally care anymore. Not now that Elizabeth’s rounding the counter anddirecting the girl to the exit.

She don’twanna go, not right away. She lingers, staring at him, and he just keepssmiling wanly at her, nodding, and shit, it takes her forever to get the hint,finally scurrying out of the store. The door’s barely even closed before Elizabeth’sflipping the lock, the open sign to closed, and then she’s spinning abruptly toface him, her cheeks flushed and her chest heaving.

“You can’tcome here when we’re open,” she tells him, and Rio pops an eyebrow at her,briefly amused, when she adds: “You draw attention.”

He curves sidewaysat that, further draping over the counter, drops his elbow to it, then his chinto his hand.

“Yeah? Howyou think I do that?”

And he can’tquite swallow the grin at the way she glares at him, striding over to that bigtable full of trinkets and shit in the middle of the store, and just startsfiddling in that way she does now. Like she needs something to do with herhands, and he lets her, moving a little forwards until he’s leaning backagainst the counter instead of beside it, eyeing her off. She ain’t dressedexactly how he wants her – in some dark wash mama jeans and some pale pinkblouse, dotted with flowers. Boots with a short, thick heel.

A sweaterwoulda been better, but this’ll do

“The pulp’sdrying,” she sniffs suddenly, eyes darting to him then away again. “So ifyou’re wanting - -”

But Rio justwaves a hand at her.

“Nah, yougonna call your sister and your lady friend. They can finish that tonight. Youand me got a job.”

It’s enoughto make her pause. To make her look up at him, her eyes wide, then narrowed,and shit, it’s that smell again, curling at his nose. He swallows, looksbriefly away, and when he looks back, Elizabeth’s still staring at him, thistime with something different on her face too – and it takes him a moment torealise that she’d taken him looking away as a win. He pushes off the counter,steps forwards quickly, just to see her jump.  

“What’s thejob?” she asks, trying to cover it, and Rio hums, moving past her to grab one ofthe little baggies of hard candy, twisting it over to half read the ingredientswhile he speaks.

“Need topick something up,” he says. Sugar and peppermint oil and water, that’s allthat’s in them. Vaguely he wonders if she’s made candies like this. Probably. Forbirthday parties and PTA mixers, to sell - too sweet - at fundraisers. He feelsher shift beside him more than he sees it, her hands stilling on a huddle ofpom pom keychains.

“Why do youneed me for that?”

“Don’t needyou,” he tells her flippant, tossing the bag of candy back down onto thedisplay, just to make her jaw square. “Just think your vibe gonna hit thiscrowd better.”

“What‘vibe’?”

And shit, hedoes look at her at that, arching an eyebrow, gaze flicking down her body, staringpointedly at her floral blouse and her mama jeans, not letting his gaze drag,because it ain’t about that - - can’t be about that, but then there’sthat smell again, and fuck, he thinks, tearing his gaze back to meet her own.

“You reallywant me to answer that?”

She rollsher eyes, shifts her weight, opens her mouth to say something, probably aboutneeding information or some sort of schedule or whatever other bullshit he ain’tgot time for, and he waits until he can see the word on the tip of her tongue,before he cuts her off.

“Finish lockin’up, call your girls. Want you in my car in five minutes, yeah?”

And withthat, he pivots, striding out of the store and back into the afternoon light.