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fly-pow-bye · 5 years ago

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DuckTales 2017 - "Louie's Eleven!"

Story by: Francisco Angones, Madison Bateman, Colleen Evanson, Christian Magalhaes, Ben Siemon, Bob Snow

Written by: Madison Bateman and Francisco Angones

Storyboard by: Stephanie Gonzaga, Rachel Paek, Brandon Warren, Krystal Ureta

Directed by: Matthew Humphreys

Will they make a spinoff of this with April, May, and June in a decade? Maybe not.

Our episode begins with a special performance by the Three Caballeros. Donald Duck begins to sing, only for Panchito Pistoles to take over for him for pretty obvious reasons, much to Donald's annoyance. Jose Carioca changes the song completely before he could get to the good part, much to Panchito's annoyance. Eventually, they get into a fight, knocking down their curtain and revealing they were performing for Scrooge, who was busy with his bath.

Unfortunately, Scrooge wasn't too impressed with this bath-interrupting showing, and he wouldn't have been impressed even if he wasn't bathing. He summons Duckworth from the afterlife to kick them out of the mansion, using his ability to turn into a demon ghost. For those just joining the series, yes, this is completely normal.

Apparently, performing in bathrooms is also normal for them, implying that they're getting desperate for that big break. They could accept an offer from anyone, even one of Donald's nephews, who is followed with music fitting for a heist. Donald's a little hesitant, but Panchito and Jose go along for the green one's scheme.

That scheme? IT. No, they're not going to get a job where they tell people to turn their computers off and on again, nor does this scheme involve any sewer clowns promising candy, rides or balloons that float, but it's "it" spelled with all caps. Specifically, this is about The IT List, a website run by "famous taste-maker" Emma Glamour, who we will see later.

Dewey butts in to talk all about why this is so important: anything on the IT List becomes super famous, and he should know because she tells him exactly what he likes. That's some interesting commentary; people can blindly go with trends without forming their own opinions. That's partially why I'm doing these reviews in the first place. While DuckTales 2017 being "the good reboot" is a popular consensus from what I can tell, I want to see if that's really the case. So far, yeah, I agree with the trends in that case. There are some others I don't, of course, but that's a different story.

A great way to get on the IT list is to be invited to her exclusive party at the Duckburg Museum, and Louie has a scheme just for that.

Louie's going to help them out under the condition that they sign a contract giving him half of the money they make when they get famous. Of course, Louie still has that Louie Inc. inside of him despite no longer owning the company. Donald is hesitant again, but Panchito and Jose sign it immediately. It seems like the Three Caballeros and their constant disagreements would be a major plot point just from these last few scenes, but it's merely more of a running gag than anything major.

This plan is titled Louie's Eleven, a reference to Ocean's 11, a 1960 film, which inspired a whole series of films in 2001, involving a heist involving 11 different people trying to steal a highly guarded casino vault using their individual skills. An Ocean's film did come out when this episode was in production, and it was following the then trend of having an all-female ensemble. Louie decided not to go with that idea.

Throughout the episode, he introduces these eleven people, one by one as soon as they become relevant:

Louie - The brains behind the operation and the closest character to Danny Ocean from the films this episode is a parody of.

2-4. The Three Caballeros - The talent(?), with a question mark that suggests that Louie isn't so sure of this. Apparently, he didn't have very many flattering photos of any of them; not even his uncle, whose photo portrays him being chased by bees.

Dewey - The specialist. He wanted to be the inside man, even having a photo ready of some person in a tuxedo with his face taped over it to show that he's the guy with the license to chill. Can't really blame him; he is now a certified Dew-ble-O-Duck. He accepts the specialist role, just because it implies he's special. Also, he wants to do yo-yo tricks, even if he's not very good at it.

We get two more of Louie's Eleven already, only to show up for one little scene each. That will be a theme with most of these members, actually. I should cut them some slack; it's not like they have 90+ minutes to spare.

Huey - The forger. Despite being the real brains of the triplets, he doesn't suspect a thing even if he's specifically told to copy Emma Glamour's signature.

Gyro Gearloose - The tech guru, who clearly is only in this just to test out some earpieces that he promises will not explode in their ears. To his credit, they never do.

They make it to the party, sneaking around the outside and peeking into the window, giving us our first shot of Glamour's personal assistant: Daisy Duck. Louie fills him in on this personal assistant of Glamour, but...

...it looks like he's already lost in her eyes with romantic music in the background and a fitting expression. Prepare for the endless amounts of daydream sequences where they just do stereotypical things without any reference to their previous character traits. After we see him with bubbly eyes, he then returns to his normal expression and says...

Donald: (shakes head) Whatever.

It's hard to buy this sudden lack of caring, but at least there's some sort of resistance to the "love at first sight" cliche that anyone would expect when these two shared screen time. Not that the cliche would be out of place as just pairing two people of the same species together; Daisy is Donald's girlfriend, after all, and that was established since her first appearance. In this series, he's not quite there yet. Daisy is unaware of this, as she is busy getting this party to be...

...perfect, as Louie unknowingly says in unison. Dewey immediately jumps out and saying he's going to dance on the red carpet, only for Louie to pull him back and say that he should be following his plan. It's Louie's Eleven, after all, and as long as there's no surprises, this party crashing will be just fine.

As to tempt fate with that last sentence, they find out that Falcon Graves is there, showing off what happens to people who violate the "no party crashers" policy. He's throwing out Percival P. Peppington, who already tried to crash a party before. I wonder if we'll ever get to see him in a major appearance; his resemblance to Willy Wonka can't be just because of that purple outfit.

Dewey definitely recognizes him, as the last time he encountered him, he made him lose a lot of money and he threw him off a building. We can even see Graves do a double take when he thinks he saw him, proving that he does remember the events of that episode, too. What are they to do?

Dewey dresses up as DJ Daft Duck, a costume he apparently was carrying with him this whole time, and the Caballeros switch their hats and wear sunglasses to pretend to be his entourage. Graves doesn't really get the chance to look closely at the forged invitation, as Daisy tells him to move the line along. Even with how much fear Dewey had, he still couldn't help himself but show off that he's ready for the fun time, much to Louie's annoyance.

This does give a little more of a point to the Caballero's disagreement on how they're going to perform, which shows up again here, as it mirrors Louie and Dewey's conflict with how they should do this plan. This conflict shows up again when they attempt to get past a different guard, only to get pushed out of the way because they don't have a stage pass. Louie has just the plan to do this, as much as Dewey wants to attempt to woo the guard with his yo-yo tricks, and it involves his number 8:

Jane - The inside woman, who managed to get a gig at this top of the line party despite being an employee at Funzo's Funzone. Considering what kind of crazy things have happened there, though, she may be overqualified at this point.

Her only action in this scheme is to spill something on Daisy, who has that all important stage pass, so that she can go off in a corner so that Donald can distract her long enough to get it. With Daisy out of the way, Louie wants to use his Louie charm to get Glamour ready for the big performance.

Falcon Graves is now right next to Glamour herself, with him showing off to a random passerby of what happens when someone violates the "no photographs" policy. She does look a little familiar, actually, and there is a reason for that.

Thankfully for Dewey, it's here where Louie decides the specialist needs to do something to divert that skilled bodyguard's attention. Unfortunately for Dewey, it's not as cool as what he thinks his yo-yo tricks are, as Louie's #9 turns out to be...

Harpy - The diversion. Yeah, it's a long story how they ended up with a harpy on their side, even if this particular harpy seems to be unwilling.

There are several reasons why the Harpy is here. First, the harpy does indeed distract Falcon Graves, getting him out of the room. Second, it shows how little Louie wants to have Dewey do anything cool. Third, hey, it's another reference to a previous episode! Other than that, yeah, she just kind of disappears after this; other than those three, she's only here so Dewey can be miserable.

Meanwhile, Daisy goes to the elevator, letting out her rage on a poor vase, something Donald would totally do. Donald, sneaking behind her, runs towards the elevator, getting his foot caught in the door. Not before he motions to Daisy to let her in first, of course; he has to show he's a gentleman!

With Donald and Daisy in the elevator, Louie tells Donald to grab the card sneakily and get out of there. How Louie thinks his Uncle Donald is that careful is beyond me, but he does know that he would need to stop that elevator in order to keep Daisy out of his way. With who? His number 10!

Webby - The tactician. Wait, wouldn't Louie be the tactician? I'd say the technician would be more fitting, considering what she does. She appears for a little bit more than the harpy, at the very least.

Donald immediately says he's got it, as he feels he could easily grab that stage pass right off of her, and Louie interprets this as that he's got the card and he's already out of the elevator and tells Webby to cut the power. Needless to easy, nothing is easy for Donald, and he eventually gets caught up in Daisy's bag. He eventually admits to Daisy that he's crashing the party, and unfortunately for him, she understood that perfectly.

Louie, who decided to go radio silent so he doesn't know what's not going down or up with his Uncle Donald, runs up to Glamour, ready to use his charm. He does this right after telling off Dewey, who felt he would be perfect because he likes everything she likes because she tells him what to like.

As a bit of karma, Glamour's first word to this random kid showing up at her literal throne and pretending he's some sort of hotshot like her suggests that she figured out his entire plan. The only thing she got wrong is that she assumed he was the one that wanted to be on the IT list...though that may not be wrong, either; there's certainly some subtext for this.

He doesn't get to ponder about that for long, though, as a bunch of mercenaries show up and tie up everyone with rope, including most of Louie's Eleven. Much to Louie's mismay, it turns out there's somebody else doing a scheme tonight. Considering these are the same mercenaries that were in the first episode, it must be the self-proclaimed scheme master himself...

...Falcon Graves?! What a twist! Much more than terrified that this seemingly invincible bodyguard is now an unavoidable villain, Louie is disappointed that Louie's Eleven isn't the only scheme in this building.

In reference to that, Dewey points out that there's still one more member in Louie's Eleven we have yet to see! Who could this 11th member be? GizmoDuck would be too heroic to participate in this scheme, they probably don't want Glomgold anywhere near them, and we already got one person associated with Greek mythology. Could it be Launchpad, possibly with the help of what remains of his inner Double-O-Duck? As everyone hears galloping in the distance, we get to see who it really is, and it's...

Manny the Headless Man-Horse - The enforcer or muscle depending on whether you go with Louie's line or what he put on the photo.

Admittedly, I wasn't expecting him to show up in this episode, so he does bring the element of surprise. Does he add anything else, though? All he really does is show off how terrifyingly strong Falcon Graves is, as he defeats him in about as long as it takes to read this sentence. After he's defeated,the episode seems to continue as if he didn't even exist, with only a mere "that was odd" from Graves before he demands to have Glamour's phone.

We cut back to the elevator, where Daisy is still quite angry that this crazy man has crashed the party. However, she reveals, along with a nice dress that she designed herself, that she wishes Glamour would listen to her, too. Donald connects with this, saying that nobody seems to understand him. There's some seeds planted here and there, with that Daisy getting into a Donald-like rage scene from earlier, but this scene is where this romantic subplot really starts to bloom. It even leads to Donald singing a song, as Daisy specially requests it.

The thing is: Daisy doesn't seem to mind his speech impediment. Not only is she the only person who can understand it, she loves Donald's singing voice! Don't worry; Dominic Lewis, the series' composer, fills in for Donald for the sake of anyone else's ears for everything but the first and last lines. This amazing voice inspired her so much, she decides to throw her bag up to the ceiling, revealing an emergency ladder, helping them escape.

Meanwhile, we get to learn why Graves wanted the phone: he wanted to sell it to a very, very wealthy high bidder. A bidder that couldn't possibly be one of his former employers, who would have a vested interest in knowing what is IT, especially himself.

It turns out to be Mark Beaks. He's even revealed to be Glamour's son in a way that totally suggests he has certain issues. Dewey says this actually makes sense, and I can only assume this is referring to how they're both people who seem to be associated with the internet, and not just because they're the only gray birds in Duckburg.

Don’t worry or unfortunately depending on one's point of view, he doesn’t get to do much. As Louie is moping about his failed plan, Dewey finally decides to do his plan.

Following in the footsteps of K-Strass the Yo-Yo Guy, Dewey manages to sneak onto the stage and do his not-so-well-practiced yo-yo tricks. Even one of the mercenaries manages to be memorized by how terrible he is, as is Graves. He's so memorized, that he doesn't notice when Donald and Daisy are ready to kick him right in the face.

Much like the last episode, which was also much like the last episode, this ends with a massive fight scene with everyone in the room. It seems like almost every episode seems to end with some massive fight scene with everyone in the room. There's even little scenes with some of the seemingly forgotten characters, including Webby, who fights one of the mercenaries. I'm not complaining, this is cool.

This fight scene also proves that Daisy is a force to be reckoned with. It does kind of make Manny even more useless, being shown up by a lady with a great dress, but I kind of expected that at this point.

To make a long story short, Graves ends up losing the battle, and a few other plot threads get their conclusion, too, including the Three Caballeros finally performing with no creative differences whatsoever. They didn't really do anything to resolve that one; it just kind of happens.

After all of this, do the Caballeros get to be on the IT list? Here's a hint: Donald finally gets to sing, and Dominic Lewis is nowhere to be heard. At least one person likes it, though.

How does it stack up?

I haven't had a good track record with romantic subplots in rebooted cartoons, but I'd say DuckTales 2017 did pretty well with this. It’s not boring, it doesn’t go too far in either direction, and we got a good performance out of it, even if it was only one in-universe to Daisy’s ears.

The Ocean's Eleven plot is pretty good too. I'm not against a good movie parody, even if I'm not that familiar with the movie in question, but it is entertaining nonetheless. 4 ducks.

Next, come on and slam, and welcome to Japan.

← The Lost Harp of Mervana! 🦆 Astro B.O.Y.D.! →

#fpb dt 2017 #fpb reviews #ducktales 2017 #ducktales #disney

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thecomicsnexus · 5 years ago

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TMNT #1-4 DECEMBER 2001 - JUNE 2002 BY PETER LAIRD, JIM LAWSON AND ERIC TALBOT

SYNOPSIS (FROM TURTLEPEDIA AND COMIC VINE)

A Fugitoid makes its way across the moon in leaps, passing by Tranquility Base and marveling at how it has stood the test of time. It meets up with an Utrom, and the two discuss their plans to finish completing a large craft and bring these "guests" that they have with them.

In a New York City alley, the Ninja Turtles face an all too familiar scene - carapaces against an alley wall while a street gang - this time, the Madhattan Maulitia - have them cornered. While the four of them are more of a match for the fifteen dullards in the Maulitia, the Turtles decide to take the rooftops as soon as possible to gain some distance between them and their foes. After a moment of reflection, they head on their way, only to find they are less safe than they had hoped, as the Maulitia has somehow followed them up with snowmobiles. After trouncing the Maulitia up on the rooftops and heading back down, Donatello comes across a snowmobile all on its lonesome and steals it. Michelangelo tries to get Don's attention for a ride in the treacherous snow, but his brother doesn't hear him and Mike slips and falls in the street. Moments later, he's hit by a bus, and a costumed character named Magnrok finds him, carrying him into an alley calling someone in to pick him up.

Meanwhile, Don rides the snowmobile into a subway and loses control, crashing it through a wall, where he finds an old, abandoned armored truck.

April and Casey head out to a fertility doctor, while Shadow trains with Metal Head. After their sparring session, Shadow worries about the outcome of the appointment. Splinter dismisses it as the impatience of a teenager, but Shadow has a premonition that big things are in store for the entire world.

Michelangelo wakes up in an ambulance to find paramedics working on him. He freaks out and tries to escape, but the paramedics warn him not to open the door. Mike pays no heed to them and does so anyway, instantly falling out and finding that the ambulance is flying. Michelangelo holds on to a handle to prevent himself from falling, but he is still dizzy and injured and loses his grip. Fortunately, a flying superhero, Raptarr, happens to be in the area and catches Mikey as he passes back out. Raptarr returns him to the ambulance.

Leonardo and Raphael return to the lair, with Raph complaining about how cold he is. Leo turns up the heat and offers to make Raph some hot chocolate, and discuss The Jones' decision to try for a child of their own. Leo then asks if they should look for their brothers, they haven't seen since the scuffle with the Madhattan Maulitia. Raph declines due to the weather and suggests Mikey's having the time of his life in the snow anyway.

Mikey wakes up again, this time strapped to a hospital bed. A woman on a video screen insists he stay put, but Mike just wants to get out of there. The woman says he's free to leave as long as he checks out at the front desk, and that his effects are in a nearby closet. He wonders aloud why the staff hasn't freaked out due to him being a mutant turtle. It is at this moment that Mikey sees that the patients at this hospital are a little out of the ordinary, consisting of various costumed adventurers and non-humans.

A Doctor Singh approaches Michelangelo with some orderlies and tells him he needs to return to his room. Mikey refuses and begins to fight with the orderlies, before they are interrupted by a man approaching in a wheelchair - the Turtles' old friend Pat, aka Zippy Lad of the Justice Force. Pat takes charge of Mikey and lets Singh and the orderlies be on their way, explaining to the turtle that he is in Kurtzburg Memorial Hospital, a special hospital for aliens, heroes, mutants, and other oddities, and one of only three places like it in the world. Pat happens to be on the hospital's board of directors and saw Mike come in while he was at a budget meeting, and vouched for him. Pat convinces Mike to get back in bed and rest up.

Back at the lair, Donatello rushes in, excited, and coaxes Casey and Raph to follow him to a discovery he's made. Leo stays behind so he can watch Junkyard Wars in peace. Don leads Raph and Casey to the abandoned armored truck he'd found, and the three of them examine the vehicle, taking notes of what would need to be cleaned and fixed to get it running again, and finding the moldy corpses of some apparent robbers inside, including a skeleton in the back wearing 1970s garb and still holding onto a gun. Don and Casey leave to get some batteries and cleaning supplies, leaving Raph to bemoan being stuck there with the "dead guys".

Shadow leaves for a clandestine rendezvous with her boyfriend Jay, while Splinter worries for her safety in the snow. When she meets up with Jay, she suggests that they go to the Jones Farm and warm up by the fireplace, but he reminds her that it's supposed to be abandoned and the last time they were there, someone called the police on them. Instead, he pesters her about going back to her place and meeting her "famously reclusive grandfather", which she turns down.

Meanwhile, on the moon, the Utroms accomplish another phase on their mysterious plan.

In the jungles of Venezuela, a research team discovers a strange life form. Meanwhile, in the Big Apple, Casey, Raph and Don get the abandoned armored car running, much to the dismay of the local New Yorkers. Master Splinter and Shadow are enraptured by the television coverage of an invasion of Unidentified Flying Objects.

The Utroms finally reveal themselves to the word in a very public display. Karai fantasizes facing the turtles in battle while her aid keeps her updated on the news about the alien arrival. After watching the tv coverage of the Utroms Michelangelo and Raphael decide to get a closer look when the stumble on a mysterious robot in the sewers.

REVIEW

As I mentioned before, the Archie TMNT comic was my gateway to the world of comic-books. But because of the indie nature of the Turtles, their comics were really hard to get from outside of the US.

As a result, collecting them was frustrating, and in any case, getting all of them was futile. It wasn’t until around 2005, that I started getting TMNT comics for real.

At the time I started with colored collected editions (First), and eventually this and Tales came up, as those were being published at the time. As a result, I got almost all of the issues for both series. I was really impressed, not only by the story, but also by the interaction of Peter Laird with the fans, and how he would keep us up to date with his life. Eventually I started watching the 2003 cartoon (also, not something I had access to at the time it was broadcasted) which was heavily influenced by Peter Laird, and some of its concepts would appear in Tales.

This is a very long story, that as far as I know, it’s incomplete and there is little hope for it to be ever finished. I do hope at some point Peter Laird takes advantage of that “18 issues a year” deal he made with Viacom and make it happen.

While both, Eastman and Laird were fans of Jack Kirby, it is very obvious in this run that Laird may have been even more. Case in point, the “Kurtzberg” hospital sequence. It’s not gonna be the last time we see Kirby inspired things in the book.

When the book starts, we get the idea that there was a time jump since the last time we saw these characters (1995), but when I saw Shadow so grown up, I realized how much time really passed. I mean, the turtles are technically still teenagers, compared to how much turtles live. But they are kind... 30 now?

Perhaps the most significant thing about this run is the Utrom non-invasion of Earth. Whenever I think of Laird’s writing, my mind goes back to this story. The way he looks at sci-fi is very positive (especially considering that the Alien visit happens right after 9-11). In a way, his writing is very similar to that of Jack Kirby, who would often dedicate pages to concepts and ideas that would make life cooler.

Jim Lawson is back, and luck us, he is being inked (and toned) by Laird and Talbot.

Perhaps the main problem with this title is the pacing of the story. As the book is bi-monthly, it takes forever for a ship to land on Earth (7 months). This is not unusual in indie comics, but it makes the first issue a bit uneventful.

I give these issues a score of 8.

#peter laird #michael dooney #jim lawson #mirage studios #comics #review #2001 #2002 #modern age #indie #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles

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tatticstudio55 · 6 years ago

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Jonerys and the myth of Orpheus& Eurydice

“Only a few feet away from the exit, Orpheus lost his faith and turned to see Eurydice behind him, but her shadow was whisked back among the dead, now trapped in Hades forever.”

(https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orpheus_and_Eurydice)

There is an orphic "something” to the Jon/Dany storylines, especially when put side by side. I’ve already dug in it a bit, but wanted to explore the matter further, especially since there’s an astounding amount of material to talk about.

We’ll start with two side by side chapters from ASOS: first, a Dany POV chapter covering the sack of Meereen, and second, a Jon POV chapter where he’s being send by Thorne to kill Mance Rayder. From a mythocritical perspective, Jon is Eurydice (the loved one stuck in the land of the dead) while Dany is Orpheus (the one who tries to retrieve his wife/her lover from Hades). Each character remains mostly consistent with these roles all through the story.

The sack of Meereen curiously evokes an intrusion in the forbidden land of the dead. The “land of Hades” stands in the middle of a waste, beyond a river (the Styx) dirty with the impure thoughts of humans, is guarded by a three headed dog (Cerberus), harpies, and, of course, giant gates. Meereen, on the other hand, is

1) Surrounded by a burnt waste from one side

2) Surrounded by the Skahazadhan from the other (described as “brown” and “thick”. We’re told that the city sewers are emptied in the Skahazadhan and that the masters of Meereen get their water from deep wells within the walls of the city.)

3) Guarded by harpy heads

4) Hiding behind seemingly impenetrable walls

5) Meereen itself isn’t particularly fertile. Not technically a waste, but almost (one reason why the slave market grew so prominent there)

6) The bloodshed of the fighting pits (supposedly) appease ghiscari gods and meereenese call it the “art of death”.

7) The dysentery epidemy ravaging the refugee camps just outside the walls of Meereen, in ADWD, also creates a strong imagery (thousands of refugees on the brink of death trying to get inside the “lands of the dead”)

So, there’s obvious parallels between Meereen and the mythological land of Hades. A few (living) heroes from the Greek mythology manages to cross from the lands of the living to the lands of the dead: Heracles, Psyche, Theseus, Orpheus. In ASOIAF/GOT, Daenerys achieve the impossible as well and take Meereen.

Now, in the next Jon POV chapter we’ve got Jon inside the elevator cage, going down the Wall to meet kill Mance Rayder. Jon is perfectly aware that, whether the mission “succeeds” or not, he’s not making it out alive:

The sky was slate grey, the sun no more than a faint patch of brightness behind the clouds. Across the killing ground, he could see the glimmer of a thousand campfires burning, but their lights seemed small and powerless against such gloom and cold.

A grim day. Jon Snow wrapped gloved hands around the bars and held tight as the wind hammered at the cage once more. When he looked straight down past his feet, the ground was lost in shadow, as if he were being lowered into some bottomless pit. Well, death is a bottomless pit of sorts, he reflected, and when this day's work is done my name will be shadowed forever. – Jon, ASOS

Jon’s inner thoughts on his surroundings closely matches common depictions of the Asphodel Meadows: it’s grey, it’s gloomy, it’s grim. It’s associated with death. Moreover, unlike Dany, Jon isn’t going down there as a conqueror/savior, but as a prisoner (Thorne gave him no choice), inside a cage nonetheless. Fun fact: in this chapter, Jon and Tormund discusses how Tormund’s daughter got married to a man who crept inside their tent during the night and stole her. Tents in ASOIAF/GOT – especially in Dany’s narrative arc – are linked with death and sorcery, so it’s not impossible that Tormund’s anecdote about his daughter might mirror Orpheus’s intrusion in the lands of the dead to steal back his wife Eurydice. And let’s not even get into what awaits Jon in Mance’s tent: Mance’s wife, Della, about to give birth (later, we learn that she died from it), and the horn of Joramun (blowing in it would apparently destroy the Wall, which keeps – as Mance reminds Jon – the dead from crossing. Hum.)

It’s interesting because, as I suggested in another post (On Jongritte and Jonerys), Dany’s last ADWD chapter portrays her as a distorted orphic figure who keeps telling herself that she’s lost if she looks back, while in Westeros (if temporality align), Jon is already dead and/or on the verge of being resurrected. The two ASOS chapters I discussed above illustrates Jon and Dany as they descend into the lands of the dead, whereas in Dany’s last ADWD chapter, we’ve got the pair (Orpheus/Dany and Eurydice/Jon) simultaneously returning to the land of the livings (literally for Jon, metaphorically for Dany, as she’s just fled Meereen).

These, however, aren’t the only instances of the Orpheus/Eurydice subtext in the Jon/Dany narrative: Dany’s fever dream in AGOT and Jon’s nightmare inside the crypts of Winterfell are another example: both dreams takes place in (or starts in) cold, empty, macabre spaces filled with ghastly presences. Dany, as Orpheus, is running toward her red door (the “exit”), while Jon, as Eurydice, hears over his head the noises of a feast he’s not allowed to attend (the land of the livings, symbolically).

There’s also a scene from 7x06 where Daenerys looks back… just in time to see Jon being grabbed by dead men and dragged under.

AND let’s not mention Daenerys’s ties to music and the musical trope: her brother was a great musician (who happened to play of the same instrument as Orpheus: a harp/lyre). Her dragons “sang” when they were born. A clever fellow somewhere figured out that Daenerys’s name read backward was “serenade”. Knowing that Orpheus’s most notable attribute was his musical talent, I’m keen on considering that significant.

Thoughts?

#game of thrones #jon x dany #jonerys #daenerys targaryen #jon snow #mythology #asoiaf

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jdmainman123 · 3 years ago

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You know we have to strategize our black skin boys I know you're with pound and snake the the two boys my two loved ones the ones I love the most now you're my favorite Sons don't tell the other boys.

But we should run up to Colorado into that white trash family and crack some n***** heads me pooping everywhere and these n****** following me outside for satellite protection why do you think we got thrown out of Kansas BECAUSE THE WHITE PEOPLE WERE COMPLAINING ABOUT THE BLACKS COME IN IF WE CAN BRING IT TO WHITEY'S DOORSTEPS AND CRACK HIS N****** HEADS WIDE OPEN ON THEIR PAVEMENT AND BRING THE FIGHT TO HIS DOORSTEP

You know yacht fish is about an airplane God is not about an airplane let me remind you this is private club of this dead white trash daughter and this little black skin boy who's in love with clean food which we all agree GOD HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE AIRPLANE MY PURPOSE

So we got to think about it I mean driving a Greyhound bus to Virginia it sounds like a good idea but it's it's like the antecedent Boston when we drove through Virginia I JUST I JUST DON'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO PLAY AROUND WITH IT AND I WANT TO GET A GOOD DOWNTOWN I WANT TO LOOK FOR A DOWNTOWN

So we may want to think about this Daddy Warbucks mode I'm ready to die for he can't do this to you little black skin boys and then force me here into these cities to perform jealous actions and satellite protection and his entire white-skinned family is a deadbeat f****** dead daughter that just sends their dead white trash daughter down here and it's not fair because for us to have realized what happened for him to make these boys born without a sister is just wrong and I think we need to make a statement bring it back to why these door steps and find a real downtown in Colorado because you know it snows it's very hard to trick the city of Colorado because of the signs everywhere in the city

Like why they brought me here to see to see the official like the first sewer Caps or the first buildings that had Jackson written on it Jackson Mississippi those are two authentic that this is a real Mississippi Jackson location you know and I and I take fate and believing I can find another downtown that's all I'm looking for is a real downtown

I'm really tired of walking around the house is the point is with the house is they're all kicked out of downtown they're not allowed to back into the downtown apartments and I'm dealing with these people who know they're going to pay a judgment whatever whatever regardless of what happens with me I'm just I'm just like you know the the girl who comes in in a prison and gives conjugal visits and dances for the prisoners like it's not going to save them from their fate but it's just like a LIKE A GIFT TO PRISONERS YOU KNOW IT'S NOT GOING TO CHANGE ANYTHING WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU GUYS AND I HATE TO SAY IT THE FACT THAT YOU GUYS QUIT FIGHTING IS REALLY BORING ME

So we need to think about it either Colorado on an airplane or a Greyhound to Virginia YEAH WHEN I WHEN I FOUND OUT THE STATEMENT IS I DIED BECAUSE OF MY MARIJUANA

And your son couldn't for these to be the official report statements and for me to be here and for you guys to fall in love with this white hair white skin boy Jason and challenge me 24/7 to talk about it and let your cities be extorted by your satellite maker and the other City knowing he has nowhere to go

It's a waste of my time to sit here and poop on sidewalks and it's my balls for this dead daughter watching on the satellite I could do better for myself you know like avoiding you since I took all your airplane that was the last straw for you losers the satellite trick was we don't have to pay we don't have to pay we don't have to get on airplanes and then now it just took over calling you guys that daughters and like me I know my daughter was killed I know she's dead I don't give a f*** you know it's not like maker offered me

I threw it

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merigreenleaf · 6 years ago

Text

World Building June 2018 - Days 27 & 30, Transportation & Weather

Transportation varies a little from country to country, but I'm going to focus on Concordia since that's my main location and the place I know the most about. They don't use animals for transportation, although there are people on the continent who still do, especially in more distant/hard to reach locations. In Concordia magic often helps power vehicles, but isn't always used.

Transportation in Silveridge: In the cities, particularly the capital Silveridge, people frequently use self-propelled means of movement or public transportation. Self-propelled often means bicycles or small vehicles that are also pedal-powered, but I've come to the realization that Concordia has roller skates. There's just something about the idea of these people in their billowing robes and gowns drifting down the streets that's so Concordia's aesthetic. The country is flat, the weather is nice, and the cities have paved streets and sidewalks, so I can see roller skates being perfect for when you want to get somewhere fast when you don't need a larger vehicle that would get stuck in traffic. What probably happened was someone made skates on a whim after visiting the continent and seeing people ice skate where it's colder, and people thought these wheeled shoes looked interesting, so it took off. In a health-conscious place with lots of healers and medics, arthritis and knee problems aren't really a thing, so I can see adults doing this, too. I think the healers would love this because it would get an otherwise not very sporty population to actually exercise.

If this isn’t someone’s thing or they can’t use bikes or skates, there are also magic-powered motors that can run the small vehicles or that came be combined with pedaling to store that energy in the battery for later. How much do you want to make a bet that someone is trying to find a way to put a motor on roller skates, too? I have my money on Sol. If someone doesn’t want to own their own vehicle, there's always public transportation. In Silveridge and the largest cities there are elevated trolleys that run above the street or you could hire someone to take you somewhere.

See also

Post Office box, used for incoming mail

Stamp vending machine, often attached to post boxes

References and sources

Notes

^Lawrence, Ken. 'Before the Penny Black'. Ken Lawrence. http://www.norbyhus.dk/btpb.html. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^Batcow, Stan (2001-12-02). 'The Post Boxes of Blackpool, England'. http://www.ausgang.com/collect/post.html. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^Wicks, Paul (2002). 'History of British Letter Boxes - Part 1: Victorian Letter Boxes'. Paul Wicks. http://www.wicks.org/pulp/part1.html. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^ abcdMarsh, Allison (2006-03-20). 'Postal Collection Mailboxes'. National Postal Museum. http://www.arago.si.edu/index.asp?con=1&cmd=1&mode=&tid=2032051. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^ abcdeShaman, Tony. 'Antique Street Letterboxes'. Antique67.com. http://www.antique67.com/articles/antique_letterboxes/antique_letterboxes.html. Retrieved 2008-08-16.

^ Canadian Museum of Civilization Corporation, History In A Box: Red Forever!, Civilisation.ca. http://www.civilisations.ca/cpm/histbox/canad_e.htm

^Marsh, Allison; Pope, Nancy (2006-04-28). 'Orr & Painter mailbox'. Postal Collection Mailboxes. National Postal Museum. http://www.arago.si.edu/index.asp?con=2&cmd=1&id=76927&img=1&pg=1. Retrieved 2008-08-16.

^ Canadian Museum of Civilization Corporation, Colour, A Postal Symbol, Civilisation.ca. http://www.civilisations.ca/cpm/histbox/couleu_e.htm

^ abGlancey, Jonathan (2007-01-16). 'Classics of everyday design No 6'. theblog. The Guardian. http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/art/2007/01/classics_of_everyday_design_no_6.html. Retrieved 2008-08-16.

^Marsh, Allison (2006-04-29). 'Street collection box damaged September 11, 2001'. Postal Collection Mailboxes. National Postal Museum. http://www.arago.si.edu/index.asp?con=2&cmd=1&id=83037&img=1&mode=&pg=1&tid=2032051. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^'A Victorian post box in Brecon - made in the Black Country'. Black Country Bugle. 2007-06-28. http://www.blackcountrybugle.co.uk/blackcountrybugle-news/displayarticle.asp?id=106007. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^'Campaign to preserve red post boxes'. BBC UK News. BBC. 2002-10-03. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/2294797.stm. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^William, Earle (1975-04-29). 'Secured mailbox'. USPTO Database. USPTO. http://patft.uspto.gov/netacgi/nph-Parser?Sect1=PTO2&Sect2=HITOFF&p=1&u=%2Fnetahtml%2FPTO%2Fsearch-bool.html&r=38&f=G&l=50&co1=AND&d=PALL&s1=3880344&OS=3880344&RS=3880344. Retrieved 2008-08-16.

^'Changes to post box collections: Collection Tabs'. Postwatch.co.uk. Archived from the original on 2007-06-30. http://web.archive.org/web/20070630075459/http://www.postwatch.co.uk/issues/CurrentIssues.asp?id=15. Retrieved 2008-08-15.

^ All Royal Mail / GPO post boxes were painted BS 538 Post Office Red between 1874 and 1969. With the introduction of the K8 Telephone kiosk in 1969, a new 'red' colour was adopted for GPO street furniture, designated B.S. 539 Post Haste Red. After British Telecom and Royal Mail were split by the British Government, BT continued to use BS539 exclusively, whilst Royal Mail use both BS538 and BS539 in a seemingly random way. Prior to 1859 there was no standard colour although there is a document in the BPMA archive indicating that optionally, the lettering and Royal cypher could be picked out in white or black. In 1859, a bronze green colour became standard until 1874. It took ten years for every box to be repainted during this period).

^PIN MAIL AG

Sources

Farrugia, Jean (1969). The letter box: a history of Post Office pillar and wall boxes. Fontwell: Centaur Press. p. 282. ISBN 0900000147.

External links

Wikimedia Foundation. 2010.

Look at other dictionaries:

post box — post boxes also post box N COUNT A post box is a metal box in a public place, where you put letters and packets to be collected. They are then sorted and delivered. Compare letterbox. [BRIT] (in AM, use mailbox) … English dictionary

post|box — «POHST BOKS», noun. = mailbox. (Cf. ↑mailbox) … Useful english dictionary

post box — noun A box in which post can be left by the sender to be picked up by a courier. Would you take these letters down to the post box please theyve already got stamps … Wiktionary

post-box — see post box … English dictionary

POST-BOX — … Useful english dictionary

post·box — /ˈpoʊstˌbɑːks/ noun, pl boxes [count] Brit : ↑mailbox 1 … Useful english dictionary

Post-office box — redirects here. For the electrical device, see Post Office Box (electricity). A Post Office box full of mail … Wikipedia

Box — describes a variety of containers and receptacles. When no specific shape is described, a typical rectangular box may be expected. Nevertheless, a box may have a horizontal cross section that is square, elongated, round or oval; sloped or domed… … Wikipedia

Post office box — A post office box (often abbreviated P.O. Box or PO Box) is a uniquely addressable lockable box located on the premises of a post office station. In many countries, particularly in Africa, and the Middle East there is no door to door delivery of… … Wikipedia

box — [[t]bɒ̱ks[/t]] ♦♦ boxes, boxing, boxed 1) N COUNT A box is a square or rectangular container with hard or stiff sides. Boxes often have lids. He reached into the cardboard box beside him... They sat on wooden boxes. ...the box of tissues on her… … English dictionary

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arplis · 4 years ago

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Arplis - News: The old Green Lantern battery is running on low, as we’ve almost reached the present, so it’s time to wind down this review of non-career superheroes and their various exploits and follie

s. While time, however, is running out, the creative spark still continues to flow through several recent productions, bringing back classic characters in new powerful misadventures. To start things off on a highly positive note, we’ll first review a couple of episodes from Pink Panther and Pals, the most recent (and one of the best) revivals of the DePatie-Freleng franchise. While Panther is visibly modified into a junior adolescent form, his spirit and pantomme humor remain intact, and comic inventiveness continues to excel. This is also true of the revival of his stablemates, the Ant and the Aardvark, one of whose episodes shall be the first examined. In Zeus Juice (3/7/10), Aardvark is having more trouble than usual keeping up with Ant (who in this incarnation has the personality of a wise-cracking Chris Rock instead of a Dean Martin drawl, though Aardvark retains his Joey Bishop persona), as ant prides himself on working out, and claims to be the speediest thing in the jungle. Before he can build up his muscles, Aardvark realizes he must develop muscles to build up. So he goes on line looking on the web for a quick-fix muscle builder. He encounters an ad for a super-juicer – a mixmaster with recipes guaranteed to provide super strength and vitality. Purchasing the product, Aardvark first tries a mixture to produce legs of steel – a concoction of fruit juices and fish oils. At first, nothing – then his legs begin to swell, and his feet start pounding the turf of their own volition. His legs take off like the Road Runner, with Aardvark’s long nose trailing helplessly behind on the ground. He finally manages to come to a stop, conveniently at the door to ant’s anthill. A pound on the ground from his “thunder thighs” jostles Ant out of his bath and up the hole, where he sees the new physique of his adversary. Racing for dear life, Ant looks back and reacts, “He’s a freak of nature. I can’t outrun that freight train.” Instead, Ant hides begind a rock – a few feet from the edge of a cliff. Aardvark sees the cliff coming, and tries his best to stop, skidding until he is hanging onto the cliff with his arms, his legs danging over the edge. “You know what he needs?”, comments Ant, “Ant-i lock brakes.” As Aardvark grabs Ant with his nose, Ant climbs up Aardvark’s face and yanks on his ear, which acts as an ignition key to stat Aardvark’s legs again. Aardvark is pulled by the sheer speed of his legs off the cliff face and onto mid-air. Looking down in horror, Aardvark tells us, “Next time, I’ll use flying fish oil.” As he falls, Ant meanders home, stating “I better call somebody to clean that up.” If at first you don’t succeed. Aardvark’s next recipe is for super-vision. His eyes develop red swirls – and suddenly fire a laser beam at his front door, leaving a charred hole. “Suddenly I’m in the mood for a barbecue”, he says. He arrives at ant’s home, and invites him to come out to observe his “new look”. Ant believes Aardvark’s been eating too many jalapenos, which would account for the red swirlies in his eyes. But a blast from Aardvark’s lasers blackens the surface of the anthill. “After all this time, it looks like you finally got me”, says Ant. “Go ahead, fry me.” Aardvark revs up his eyes for a fatal blow, but Ant produces a mirror at the last split second – and the reflected beam chars Aardvark’s head to a powder. “I’d stay out of the sun if I were you”, retorts Ant. “Your head looks a little well done.” Recipe #3: Super smell. Aardvark’s already pronounced nose develops biceps of its own, prompting Ant to inquire if his sinuses are acting up. Aardvark turns on his vacuum power at super level – but only succeeds in sucking himself into his own nose, rolling him up like a pill bug. “Hey, you need a ride home?” asks Ant, giving him a kick to roll him back to his cave. Recipe #4: Since physical strength has failed, how about a super mind? Aardvark returns to Ant’s hill with lobes swollen five times their normal size. Ant inquires, “It looks like that hurts.” “Well, a little”, responds Aardvark, “…but enough already! Now you’ll never outsmart me.” So ant instead poses him a question he’s been pondering for years: “Why can’t you ever catch me?” The old unanswerable question trope strikes again, and, as Ant produces an umbrella to avoid the splatter, Aardvark’s head explodes. Aardvark is finally through with the juicer, dumping it in the trash can. He returns to the ant hill, vowing to get his meal the good old fashioned way. Turning on his vacuum nose, he miraculously sucks out the Ant on the first try. “I did it. It’s a miracle”, shouts Aardvark. Suddenly, from inside his nose, Aardvark is repeatedly judo flipped. Out of his nose emerges Ant – buffed like a miniature Hercules, thanking Aardvark for turning him on to the juicer. Aardvark lays prone on the ground, and closes with the line, “Next time I’m hungry, I’ll order pizza.” Pink! Pow! Kaboom! (Pink Panther and Pals, 8/13/10) – Pink Panther faces the same dilemma as Bart Simpson in an earlier post in this series – an irresistible collector’s comic in a comics store window – and only a buck to his name. When proprietor Big Nose (who’s priced the collectible with a tag reading “$$$”) sees Pink’s single bill, not only does he respond with humiliating laughter, but for the price hands Pink a stack of blank paper and a pencil – draw your own. Ponk returns home, and sets to work from the inside out – leaping onto the paper itself, drawing a box around him, and filling in the details as he goes. He draws in a city – but finds it inhabited by a humongous green monster, who begins a destructive rampage. Pink realizes he holds the upper hand, as his pencil is equipped with an eraser, and begins to erase the giant’s toes. The giant flings him into the skies with a snap of his fingers. Pink counters by drawing a super suit around himself (some padding might have helped, as it deflates from muscular build to his puny skinny form the moment after it is drawn). Pink begins some playful fun with the monster, drawing two windows in mid-air so he can pop in and out of them. When the giant looks in, Pink pencils his face with clown make-up, then holds up a mirror to emphasize the embarrassment. Pink next pulls a “Duck Amuck” tribute, changing the backgrounds behind the monster in mid-chase, causing him to slide on ice into a snowdrift (leaving a hole in the snow in the silhouette of a jackass), then coming out the other side as a giant snowman. Pink changes the background again to a desert scene, and melts the giant’s snow away. He draws and offers to the perspiring giant a huge glass of water – then renders his need totally unnecessary by drawing him into the middle of the ocean. Pink flushes him away by pulling a plug, returning the background to a cityscape. The giant returns from the sewer, but Pink crosses him out with the pencil and redesigns him as a baby in a baby carriage. But even a baby monster has powers, and the creature lets out with a super-bawl that has the power of an atom bomb – sending the entire comic book blasting through Pink’s roof, to land outside on a city sidewalk. Back in the comic, Pink finds himself prone on the ground, and the giant somehow regrown to his original form. On top of that, the giant has taken Pink’s supersuit, and tears the suit in half. The giant generates a force field from his fists, which encircles Pink – and from which emerge an army of giants like himself. Still wielding the pencil, Ponk faces the situation with determination, and a heroic glint in his eye, as the camera angles change to a tribute to anime. Swinging the pencil like a Samurai, Pink erases giant after giant in a ferocious battle – until the street is cleared, save the original monster, for a final showdown. With a roar, the monster charges at Pink, and Pink charges at the monster. They meet in the center, Pink wildly swinging his pencil. Pink lands unharmed, but the point breaks off his pencil tip. The giant chuckles fiendishly – but looks down to find his parts separated from each other by broad strokes of emptiness from the eraser. With a clatter, he disassembles and falls in a heap of parts to the ground. Pink has reached the last panel on the comics page, and exits the completed book. As fate would have it, the sidewalk on which the comic landed is right outside Big Nose’s shop, as Big Nose returns to open up. He spies the new comic on the ground, and is impressed by its artwork. He reaches into his pocket for some cash for a purchase – but Pink insists on a trade – for the collector’s item in the window. Reluctantly, Big Nose can’t resist, and the rare prize becomes the panther’s own. Inside the shop. Big Nose settles down to read Pink’s masterwork, when the huge green hand of the monster emerges from its pages and hauls Big Nose inside, the pages closing as thuds, thumps, and leaping pages denote the battle resuming all over again within. Then there is Garfield (as promised from last week’s article). He’s undergone some considerable changes in recent times – the first being a move to CGI (in a few feature films, and then in a series of direct to video features starting with Garfield Gets Real). Garfield’s Pet Force (6/16/09) is one of these, and not very super at all. Some primary problems of this feature series were as follows. First, instead of keeping Garfield rooted in reality, he, Jon and Odie are now residents of Cartoon World, outwardly aware of their fictional nature, something like Heckle and Jeckle. (One particularly good line results from this, in a scene where Garfield is twisted like a spiral in a torture device, but feeling no pain – “I’m a cartoon character. I do squash and stretch for a living.”). Instead of being a career cartoonist, Jon now takes Odie and Garfield to a TV-like studio, where they “film” a comic strip for each issue. And the various animal characters actually talk, and Jon and Liz can understand them, instead of merely being heard by the audience through thought projection. The whole thing is rather unnerving for old-school fans of the show. Top that with the fact that the personalities of two of the principals are altered or watered-down. Garfield still gets jokes on food, fatness, and laziness, but seems to have lost the power to insult or belittle, making no particular zingers about canine stupidity or even Nermal’s ability to aggravate. And Nermal, instead of playing the innocent or thriving on reputation as world’s cutest kitten, now seems to have swapped personalities with Scrappy Doo, just generally diving into trouble. Egad! Plotwise, it’s a convoluted tale of a parallel universe, in which an animal superhero squad are the guardians of the kingdom of a Jon-lookalike monarch, who shares with Jon a complete lack of talent in attracting women. Garfield’s parallel (Garzooka) talks in a resonant superhero voice, is muscular in build, stands about four times taller than Garfield, and is leader of the Pet Force – his powers being super strength, and radioactive hairballs. Odie’s counterpart specializes in stunning blows with his tongue. The counterpart to Arlene (Garfield’s new girlfriend) gives icy stares that freeze her victims in place. And Nermal’s counterpart has super speed. Enter a counterpart to Liz, visiting from another planet. King Jon falls for her instantly, babbling out an instant proposal of marriage. Oddly, she accepts – only for purposes of getting her hands on a set of keys to the royal arsenal, to obtain the kingdom’s latest invention – a molecular scrambler gun that not only mutates its targets into combinations of each other’s parts, but renders them mindless zombies under the shooter’s control. Three of the Pet Force are so mutated, and only Garzooka escapes, nabbing away the Klopman crystal (a counterpart to the original series’ recurring references to the Klopman diamond), which is the scrambling gun’s power source. With the assistance of the gun’s inventor, Garzooka also obtains vials of serum to endow the powers of his mutated comrades to new replacements, and the space coordinates of the only other residents of the galaxy with DNA matches to his fallen comrades. He takes off in a space ship to find the “matches” – Nermal, Odie, and Arlene. Garfield himself gets rather left out of the superhero action (since Garzooka is still in charge), while his friends take the serum and acquire the powers within. Garfield’s only real connection to the storyline is a brief assignment to guard the Klopman crystal – which, despite slipping it into a glass of lemonade as an “ice” cube, is eventually discovered by the villainess who follows Garzooka to Cartoon World. The villainess zombifies most of the population, and orders them to obliterate the Pet Force. The Force heads for a tall tower in the center of town, in hopes of using the structure as a giant harpoon to spear the villainess’s ship, while the zombie army pursues and corners them for a showdown. Garfield finally decides, against his nature, to become “involved”, and, standing on the shoulders of one of the co-workers at the comic-strip studio, devises a Garzooka disguise, luring the zombie army back to the studio to march en masse into a trap door opening to the cellar. The diversion allows the Pet Force to harpoon the ship. The villainess counters by mutating half the buildings in town into a giant metallic monster. Garfield somehow survives the chase, trips up the monster, obtains the ray gun, and mutates the villainess into a “good” girl who apologizes and accepts the position as loving queen. The film tells a story, yes – it’s just not a Garfield story. The Garfield Show, a more recent revival, at least returns the characters to the contemporary suburbs. However, it retains from the prior incarnation the animal characters continuing to talk with actual lip movements. It compromises a bit back toward the old days, striving for a halfway poont between the original and the non-abrasive Garfield, and between the “cute” verses the proactive Nermal. Super Me (12/21/09) – Garfield and Nermal watch the television adventures of hero “Ultra Powerful Guy”. Garfield as usual won’t share his snacks with Nermal during the viewing, and yields the bag of potato chips only when its contents have been emptied. Nermal stands up for himself, telling Garfield he doesn’t need his snacks, as he can get them all by himself. “This I gotta see”, said Garfield. Nermal seats himself on the sidewalk, and puts on his most adorable cute-kitten face and irresistible meows. A car stops abruptly, its occupants mesmerized by Nermal’s cuteness – and they just can’t resist handing over to Nermal an entire pepperoni pizza with mushroms and Canadian bacon. Garfield’s jaw drops in amazement, as he races over to get a share of the take. But now it’s Nermal who claims to have nothing left to share. Garfield complains that he’d bet Nermal would share if Ultra Powerful Guy were around – then states to the audience, “Idea happening.” Fashioning a supersuit out of old clothes from Jon’s closet, Garfield follows Nermal to a phone booth where Nermal is looking up local cat shows to win, and props a broom against the booth door, trapping Nermal inside. He then dives on the broom from the roof of the booth in his outfit as Ultra Powerful Guy, making a “rescue”. Nermal reacts in disbelief that Ultra Powerful Guy is so short and round in build, but feels indebted to him in view of the timely rescue. Garfield convinces Nermal that superheroes need to eat, too, and suggests as a reward that Nermal turn on some of his “cute” magic to drum up an entree. Nermal repeats his performance at the curbside, and stops another motorist in his tracks, who just happens to have a heaping plate of spaghetti and meatballs. This reward suits Garfield fine. After devouring it, he notes “You know what goes great after spaghetti for desert? Anything!” He rigs another rescue of Nermal, pushing a trash dumpster to roll down a steep hill. Garfield rides atop the dumpster to issue a timely warning for Nermal to get out of the way. At the foot of the hill, two would-be bank robbers debate holding up the bank, but are fearsome that Ultra Powerful Guy might be in the vicinity. On cue, Garfield’s trash dumpster reaches the end of the line, and Garfield falls inside the trash. Garfield emerges with a banana draped over his head, noting that this never happens to Batman. He removes his soiled mask – and the crooks believe they’ve just witnessed the hero’s true secret identity – a fat cat. Unafraid, they decide the time is ripe for bank robbery after all. Garfield meanwhile returns to Nermal, demanding a reward of a banana cream pie with chocolate sprinkles. Nermal’s best “cute” face only reaps a chocolate cream pie with banana sprinkles. “Close enough”, saus Garfield. An alarm nearby reveals the crooks making a getaway from the bank. Nermal pyshes a reluctant Garfield forward to apprehend the culprits. The crooks state they are not afraid, as they know Ultra Powerful Guy’s secret and his weakness. They drop before Garfield a catnip mouse. Nermal sees instant hearts, and flips onto his back to play with the toy. Garfield isn’t affected in the least, and states that nect time, they should try stuffing the mouse with lasagna. Their plan not working, the crooks head for their getaway car, catching Garfield’s cape in the door. Another predicament Garfield insists would never happen to Batman. Garfield is dragged down the street, frantically yelling for assistance and to let him off at the earliest opportunity. But who should arrive to stop the getaway, but Ultra Powerful Man himself, thanking Garfield for delaying the crooks long enough for him to arrive. Nermal catches up to congratulate the hero on the amazing capture – then notes that there are now two of them. He asks which is the real one, and both Garfield and the hero chime in unison “I am”. “Now c’mon, that’s not fair”, says Nermal, and asks them again. “I am” comes the simultaneous reply. “Aw, really, which one of you is it?” Garfield and the hero exchange winks, as they are starting to enjoy this, and for the remainder of the night, continue to frustrate Nermal with their united response of “I am”. The Amazing Flying Dog (12/22/09) seems more aimed at the younger viewers than usual, attempting to build a meager plotline about Odie’s daydreams of being a caped superhero and flying to the rescue of a cute poodle he has his eyes on. His daydreams include a rescue of the pooch from a burning building (using flying power to pull her from a fiery balcony, and ice breath to blow out the fire), and from the passenger seat of a car careening without brakes backwards down a steep hill. Garfield keeps waking him from his dreams, and eventually breaks it to him that “Dogs can’t fly!” Then Garfield tries to cross a road under construction, and his feet get caught in fresh asphault. The poodle tries to rescue Garfield, and gets stuck too. Here comes the steamroller. Odie hears the calls for help, and gives one last try to jumping off the roof. His ears extend, and he soars aeronautically like Dumbo, swooping in to make a nick of time rescue. Garfield turns to the audience, asking in complete puzzlement, “Did you see…” – and then awakes from his own dream about Odie. The episode peacefully ends, with the nagging question of what is life, and what is reality? The Caped Avenger Rides Again (9/10/12) – Jim Davis expected a long memory from his viewers, harkening back in this installment to his original “Caped Avenger” from 1988 previously reviewed in these articles – without barely so much as a recap to establish Garfield’s previous venture into superherodom. Jon is making a personal appearance at a comic book store to sign autographs, and Garfield brings along his Caped Avenger outfit just in case. To no viewer’s surprise, nobody shows up for Jon’s nom de plume. The store proprietor, an old-timer in the business, is disappointed at the lack of turnout, and says he’s tries everything to drum up buisiness, but attendance has slipped off drastically. He even has a rare first edition comic on display as another attraction, but still no interest. The comic isn’t even his – only there on a loan from its owner, with the condition that an armed guard be posted on duty at all times. Mysteriously, when everyone is engaged in conversation, a crash is heard. The front window is broken, and the guard seemingly knocked unconscious, with the rare first edition gone. Upon reviving the guard, he claims the assailant wore a mask, and can provide no detailed description. Garfield reverts to his Caped Avenger costume to play amateur sleuth, and Odie joins him in the same Superman style outfit used in the 1988 episode, as his sidekick, Slurp (Garfield lifting a line of dialogue straight out of the original cartoon, that the sidekick must never dress better than the superhero). They skulk through some back alleys for clues, as the film suddenly becomes slightly 2D for a flashback to provide an origin story (much in the way cutaway sequences were used in some of the “Power Pig” episodes for side-trips in the storyline of the original show). A few reasonable gags appear in the flashback. Garfield searches for an image that will strike fear in the hearts of the criminal element, so fashions his first costume as his own scariest nightmare – a pizza with anchovies. Not very effective. Converting to proper attire, the Avenger and Slurp hit the streets. Hearing a citizen’s cries of a despicable – and dangerous – villain robbing the bank, Garfield decides this is a job for – his sidekick, and tells Odie to look him up when it’s over in Bermuda. But the robber (a lobster-clawed supervillain) blocks Garfield’s attempt to exit carrying a surfboard. Garfield tries to convince the villain to give up, in view of Garfield’s devastating super powers. Garfield demonstrates super speed by running clear around the world – arriving back about a minute later, completely winded, and complaining that he was held up in a traffic jam in Luxembourg. Garfield demonstrates super strength by lifting the heaviest object in the vicinity – himself – eventually losing his grip, as he acknowledges “Jon was right, I do need to lose a few pounds.” Instead of surrendering, the villain throws Garfield through a brick wall. As Garfield notices the stray bricks on his side of the wall, something clicks in his memory, and he reverts back to reality, returning with Odie to the shop. The glass of the broken window is outside, not inside the store, indicating that the thief nroke the window from the inside. The security guard is spotted attempting to sneak out of the store – with comic book hidden inside his coat. An obligatory chase (in which Garfield uncharacteristically runs at a speed far beyond the expected velocity of an overweight cat) leads to a blind alley, with an inclined board the only route over a fence. Garfield and Odie find it first, and lay a trap. As the guard mounts the board to leap over the wall, Garfield and Odie position a trash dumpster on the other side, then slam its lid down as the guard lands inside, Garfield sitting on the lid to prevent the guard’s escape. The police make the arrest, the comic book is retruned, and the comics store has a new attraction that finally draws customers – the Caped Avenger in person. Garfuels asides to the audience, “Batman, eat your heart out.” The Superhero Apprentice (9/10/12) – Last time, we were expected to remember an episode from 1988. This time, we’re unbelievably supposed to forget a central plot point from the previous episode in the same half-hour! All memory is supposed to disappear that Odie has already been used twice as a sidekick. The comic book store has been saved by the publicity of the Caped Avenger’s solving of the comic book mystery, and its proprietor has invested in an expected shipment of Avenger action figures, which has fans lined up around the block awaiting delivery. Footage of the Avenger’s capture of the criminal (now how did they happen to have camera shots of the dumpster capture in the blind alley?) has gone viral, only eclipsed by a #1 video of the world’s cutest singing kitten – Nermal. But Nermal fears the Avenger’s popularity is striking too close to home, and might topple him from the #1 berth. Meanwhile (ignoring Odie’s previous involvement in the chase and capture), the comic book guy reveals in a news interview that consensus of fan opinion is that the Avenger should take on a sidekick. Garfield ponders this as a serious issue, realizing all the past great heroes had sidekicks. Odie prances around, demonstrating his willingness to join up – but choosy Garfield instead holds open interviews for the position. All applicants disappear after Garfield lets slip that they’ll be placing their life on the line for no pay. One runaway (a Chihuahua) encounters dejected Nermal, and the dog’s costume gives Nermal the idea that the only way to counter a superhero is with a supervillain. Nermal recruits the dog as his own assistant, and acquires a wrestling mask and cape as a disguise for himself. That night, the newly-evil duo doctor a “bat-signal” for the Avenger outside the comics store, to make the Avenger’s image paunchy and ridiculous. They also show up at the unveiling of the action figures. Garfield, however, also arrives, having seen video footage of the attack on his signaler, and, sensing a need for assistance, has finally relented and hired Odie as his partner “Slurp”. The delivery of the figures is interrupted by the Chihuahua nipping at the truck driver’s heels, while Nermal commandeers the truck, with just one catch – he doesn’t know how to drive. The truck takes off on a downhill road, with puny Nermal clinging to the spinning steering wheel, unable to reach the brakes. Garfield pursues, stumbling on a street trash can and running atop it like a log roller, finally thrown onto the roof of the moving truck. The truck crashes into the fence of a trash collection center, throwing Garfield and Nermal over the fence and into a chute for trash disposal. Inside, they face a conveyor belt of chopping and shredding contraptions, with a flattening wheel at the end of the belt. Garfield and Nermal race against the speed of the belt to keep from being pressed into pizzas. Odie appears, looking through a hatchway above. Garfield calls him for “doggie tongue”, and Odie lowers his long appendage down the hole, where Garfield grabs it like a rescue rope, and also grabs Nermal, with Odie hauling them out to safety, a split second before Nermal’s cape would have dragged him into the machinery. For all their effort, the action figures fail to sell, as now all public attention has shifted to Slurp, with footage of his rescue taking the #1 web slot, knocking Nermal’s video out of the lead once and for all. Nermal decides to take his meow-singing act to the streets, and Garfield, also through with superheroing, joins him. The Looney Tunes Show was all about a tenuous marriage of media – the Looney Tunes gang, in a contemporary “Friends” style new millennium sitcom? While occasionally generating a winning situaion, there usually seemed to me a certain uneasiness at pressing the characters into “everyday” situations. (I’ve wondered if the group might have been better-fitted to a 1960’s sitcom. Imagine Bugs and Lola Bunny as Dick Van Dyke and Mary Tyler Moore. Daffy and his girlfriend as Morey Amsterdam and Rose Marie. And Elmer Fudd as Richard Deacon. For a son, we could even revive Clyde from “His Hare-Raising Tale”.) However strange the series may have been on the whole, the writers found a combination of genres that clicked for their series finale – Super Rabbit (5/23/13) (not to be confused with the original 1943 classic of the same name). Daffy’s looking for quick cash, so raiding through Bugs’ stuff for something to sell. Bugs attempts to guard an old knick-knack (a glass carrot) with a tall tale. “I’m not the bunny you think I am. My real name is Kal El. I was born long ago on the planet Krypton.” Daffy stops him cold. “Krypton? That’s Superman’s home planet. I fell for that once, but I’m way too smart to fall for it again.” Bugs qualifies his statement – “That’s ‘Crypton’ with a ‘C’” – and Daffy buys into the tale, hook, line, and sinker. Bugs spins a yarn of his exploits guarding the city of Metropolis – an adventure unique in its presentation, retaining much of the zaniness of the Looney Tunes stars while telling in the background of the action a pretty straightforward Superman story, complete with all the dark backgrounds and elaborate special effects that have become standard to the Warner DC Universe. It succeeds in coming off as the best of both worlds. Bugs has a comic exploit outwitting Marvin the Martian as Braniac (including a visually-inventive scene with Bugs taking pot-shots at Marvin with his own miniaturizing-enlarging ray, until every part of Marvin has eigher expanded gigantically or shrunken substantially. ‘I’m a regular Pablo Picasso”, says Bugs. He next tackles Elmer Fudd as Lex Luthor, eventually blasting him out of his supersuit and leaving him only a pair of striped shorts, and kicking the remains of Luthor’s armor into space. But Elmer informs Bugs that he has just succeeded in launching a radioactively unstable generator within the suit into deep space. The suit turns out to be on collision course with the Phantom Zone in which General Zod (Daffy Duck) and two minions (one his girlfriend, the other a robot) have been imprisoned. The blast frees the prisoners, and Zod and his companions plot the conquest of Earth. Amidst a ticker-tape parade, Bugs’s enjoyment of the side-perks of being a hero is interrupted by Zod’s trio. Battling is work for underlings, so Zod leaves his companions in charge to make short work of Super-Rabbit, who is forced to surrender beneath the foot of Zod’s robot. Zod sets up a palace, complete with huge golden idol of himself, and a chorus of slaves who attempt to compose for Zod a new national anthem (“My Country Tis of Thee” played in a minor key with new lyrics hailing Zod). Bugs meanwhile visits the Fortress of Solitude, where the spirit of his father states he had his defeat coming, as he had softened under the effects of showboating for the attentions of fame rather than fighting for the right. Bugs is advised to learn the adversaries’ weaknesses, and make them his own strengths. Making an entrance at Zod’s palace as reporter Clark Kent, Bugs deduces that Zod’s girlfriend is constantly being put down by him, while the robot is treated by Zod as a brainless infant. Revealing himself for battle, Bugs puts in the right words of flattery to each of the minions in the course of the fray, acquiring friends among Zod’s ranks. He finally confronts Zod polishing his statue, and when Zod orders his cohorts to attack, they step away, leaving Zod to battle alone. An epic confrontation on a Superman scale follows, with laser eye beams cutting buildings in half, vehicles thrown as weapons, and a flying chase through the tunnels of a subway. Bugs finally outmaneuvers Zod upon his emergence from the tunnels, grabbing Zod’s cape from behind and flinging him into his own golden statue. As Zod lies dazed at the foot of his own image, Bugs says, “Hey Doc, kneel before yourself”, then uses his laser vision to cut through the base of the statue. As the statue collapses, Zod, seeing it about to topple, screams “I’m going to hurt me!” Then crash! – and Bugs stands alone. Concluding his story to Daffy, Bugs claims he banished Zod and his minions to another Phantom Zone, then gave up his powers, realizing power corrupts. This is where Daffy suspends his belief in the story – feeling that no one would give up such power and super-goodies – and leaves to hock Bugs’s stuff anyway to finance his date for the evening. The scene changes to a movie theatre, playing “The Mark of Zorro”. Daffy and his date, dressed in what appears to be period attire, decide to save a ridiculously small number of seconds getting back to their car by going down a dark alley. Fans of Batman can see what’s coming a mile away – a Crime Alley accosting by a hoodlum. Who should arrive to save the day but – Bat-Rabbit. The hero hands pearls back to Daffy’s date, while Daffy offers no reward, since he didn’t specifically ask to be saved anyway. As the ducks leave, Bat-Rabbit reveals himself to us as Bugs, delivering in his best impersonation of Kevin Conroy his own signature line, “Ain’t I a stinker?” While I’m usually a fan of Rowan Atkinson in his appearances in person on big or small screen, I’m rather underwhelmed by his “Mr. Bean” animated series. Superhero Bean (2/22/16) is little more than a time-filler, with no actual powers whatsoever, merely chronicling Bean’s costumed attempts to trail a domestic burglar on the rooftops. Not a genuinely funny moment in the whole slow-paced episode. Super-Wacky (Cartoon Network, Wacky Races (revival),10/29/18) tries to pack a lot in, but forgets entirely that the premise of the show is to conduct races – instead devising a far-out plot on the personalities of the show’s characters alone. Peter Perfect rules the roost as the superhero guardian of a city, until one day he faces the challenge of – superhero oversaturation. Suddenly, all the current Wacky Racers (excepting Dastardly and Muttley) have transformed into superheroes too, and want in on a piece of the city’s action. In competition with Petet’s super chin-laser, Penelope Pitstop flies, turns everything she touches pink (as she admits, more of a curse than a power), and carries a radioactive lasso that makes anyone caught in it utter bad puns. I.Q. (junior counterpart to Professor Pat Pending) is half cyborg, with a robotic arm that often acts out of control with a mind of its own. The Gruesome Twosome have bat powers and invisibility. Meanwhile, Dick Dastardly is Wackopolis’s resident super villain, with a head swollen with psychic powers to control minds, and Muttley possesses a sonic snicker that can bring down walls. Dastardly hypnotizes the mayor to outlaw super-heroes, but the racers plot their strategy to bring her out of it. Part of the plan is to round up “the best team of heroes the legal department will let us use on this show”. The open auditions attract an overflow of old Hanna-Barbera stars, including Snagglepuss, Rosie the Robot, Space Ghost, Hong Kong Phooey, Winnie Witch, and Jabberjaw (this on top of a one-shot cameo for Quick Draw McGraw as El Kabong in the opening scene). All the applicants flunk out (Snagglepuss even exiting stage right), leaving the original racers to forge on alone. They head for the mayor’s office, and battle an army of flying Muttley robots (a harken back to Muttley’s rotor tail flying in “Dastardly and Mettley in Their Flying Machines”). Then, taking the battle to Dastardly’s lair (which Peter had a map to all the time), the group, except for Peter, succumb to Dastardly’s mind control, until Peter reminds them of the greater strength of their super-friendship. Muttley carries Dastardly to an escape as the racers break freee of his brainwashing – but Dastardly returns in the final frames of the episode at the helm of a giant town-stomping robo-Muttley. The racers launch into the fray again, and are stopped in a freeze frame for “The End” and a last insertion of a merchandising advertisement for their super products. Snowball, the rebellious rabbit who led a revolution against the human race in 2016‘s The Secret Life of Pets, undergoes a nearly complete personality transformation to keep him in the storyline in The Secret Life of Pets 2 (6/7/19). His new little girl owner is into superhero shows, and dresses him in a miniature mask, suit and cape as “Captain Snowball”. Snowball adapts to the new role, now determined to be the protector of the world rather than its overthrower, and incorporates his love of kung fu moves into the act. A short 2D segment provides the closest to superpowers he demonstrates, including socking a bad guy through the side of several buildings, and an ultrasonic roar. In real life, minus anything but his own speed and fight moves, he becomes involved in a rescue mission to save a rare white tiger who is being abused by a sinister circus owner determined to train him to perform death defying feats. Snowball must outwit a quartet of wolves who serve as guards to keep the tiger in and strangers out (including a humorous chase through various midway attractions), release the tiger from its cage, and attempt to find the tiger a hiding place in the apartments of the big city. Eventually, the whole cast of the franchise are drawn into the action, as the wolves and circus owner close in, and tranquilize the tiger, transporting him back to the circus train. Snowball uses an RC vehicle to catch up with the train, and engages in a battle of fisticuffs with the circus owner’s maniacal monkey, climaxed by shooting the monkey out of a cannon. Snowball and several of the other pets, together with the tiger, gang up on the villain in the engineer’s cab, and the tiger is eventually freed, and finds a new home amongst the flock of felines in the apartment of a neighboring cat lady. Just as Snowball is content and confident in his life as a superhero, his little girl changes his outfit to fit her latest craze – dressing him as a fairy godmother. Snowball surprisingly accepts the role with glee, confident that he can face any new challenge after surviving the last one. (A direct to video short, “Super Gidget”, released on the home editions of the feature, was unavailable for review – anyone with nformation on it is invited to comment below.) DarkBat (8/29/19), from New Looney Tunes, is an interesting character mashup. Hubie and Bertie (together with an unknown fat mouse who seems to be new to the series) run a fruit stand for mice with the spillage from a human fruit stand, trading for cheese as currency. They are set upon by an unusual posse of cats – Sylvester, Claude Cat, and Pete Puma, in what may be their first onscreen meeting. But to the rescue comes the unexpected arrival of a small winged caped crusader – DarkBat. The deep-voiced vigilante, runs the cats a brief merry chase, landing alternately on their “heads, shoulders, knees and toes” in mimic of a children’s game-song to draw stick blows from the other cats upon whoever he lands on, then playing a game of “whack-a-mole” among the produce with Pete, armed with what DarkBat guarantees is a mallet that will only bash bats, but manages to hit only the other cats instead. Darkbat finally tries the mallet himself, smashing Pete on the head, then declaring, “You’re right. Defective.” With some banana peels, DarkBat caises the three cats to slip into a packing crate, which DearkBat nails shut and labels for delivery to Nome, Alaska. Hubie and Bertie thank DarkBat, but inquire as to his true identity. DarkBat is quite eager to share, pulling off the cowl to reveal the most unlikely choice for a superhero among the classic warner toons – Sniffles the Mouse! In his “can’t sop talking” mode, Sniffles babbles on how isn’t it something, that he can put on this costume, and it lets him do all sorts of crazy things. “Pretty cool, huh?” he asks. “It was until you took the mask off”, aays the fat mouse. But Sniffles flies off into the night (interesting that he would choose to become a bat, when a real bat was the cause of his change to talkative personality in The Brave Little Bat in 1941), while the mice comment that there goes another superhero who’s just a little batty. Writers will again be writers, trying to milk a good one-shot idea for extra episodes. Bonjour, DarkBat (8/29/19) pits Sniffles’ super-alias against Blacque Jacque Shellacque. Unfortunately, with the “cat out of the bag”, so to speak, as to DarkBat’s true identity, the element of surprise for an ending is gone, so the episode has to rely entirely on its gag content to justify itself. Actually, it manages to not fare badly on such count, dealing with a war inside Shelacque’s cheese shop when he wrecks rivals Hubie and Bertie’s curbside cheese wagon. A duel sequence uses everything in the shop as weaponry, from French breads to kitchen utensils down to tasting toothpicks. And the dialogue packs in every bad cheese pun the 4 1/2 minutes can handle – including using a high-pressure Brie dispenser to turn Shellacque into “de-brie”, and DarkBat telling Hubie and Bertie that only the Gouda guys win. Not too shabby an effort. Still funny, but becoming formulaic, is a final installment. Smoothie Operator (1/30/20). Same premise as previous episode, different villain. Yosemite Sam shuts down the mice’s smoothie stand to stop competition with his own. More bad puns on fruits and vegetables. Battles with alternating hot and cold ingredients, and a final chase with a jet-propelled motorcycle. A lot of action, but not as original. I’m sure there’s a few I’ve missed along the way. If anyone has any favorites that didn’t receive print space here, your input below is as always appreciated. The holidays (such as they are) are nearly upon us, and next week, it’s time for celebration – as the song goes, “if only in our dreams”. The post Reign of the Supertoons (Part 11) appeared first on . #Garfield #PinkPanther #AnimationTrails #DaffyDuck

Arplis - News source https://arplis.com/blogs/news/the-old-green-lantern-battery-is-running-on-low-as-we-ve-almost-reached-the-present-so-it-s-time-to-wind-down-this-review-of-non-career-superheroes-and-their-various-exploits-and-follie

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courtinggrievances · 7 years ago

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[[I’m gonna... take this time to put up a log kk had with eri this morning. this was rushedly formatted and it took me a bit to figure out how, so there might be some random < p > or something in there

PS: any formatting we did have from the discord got... erased so.... that sucks but you’ll get the point, even if they both get a bit, uh, runon? we tried to figure out a solution but right now i want to sacrifice quality for speed cause i need to sleep and we can fix it later if we really gotta]]

eridan | mags - Today at 7:37

so uh hey kar howwvve you been

Court (Kam) - Today at 7:42

HEY! NOT TERRIBLY TERRIBLE, IF I'M HONEST. IT'S NOT GETTING ANY COLDER, AND THE DRONES HAVEN'T CAUGHT US YET, SO THERE'S THAT.

eridan | mags - Today at 7:43

that doesnt relievve me all that much if im bein honest but alright i guess at least theres that just try and not get killed alright

Court (Kam) - Today at 7:43

HEY, WE'RE THINKING THE SAME THING HERE. I MEAN, I'M NOT RELIEVED AT ALL, BUT IF ANYTHING ELSE, I'VE STILL GOT MY LIFE, HAHA. FUCK, YOU KNOW I'M LITERALLY A FUGITIVE RIGHT? LIKE IF I WAS ON YOUR ALTERNIA, HOW LONG DO YOU THINK IT'D BE FOR A DRONE TO MATCH MY PROFILE UP IN THE DATABANKS AND SWOOP DOWN TO CARRY ME OFF IN ITS GRUBBY LITTLE CLAWS? LIKE I'LL TRY, BUT HEY. NO PROMISES.

eridan | mags - Today at 7:45

yeah ill nevver bring you to alternia thats for sure

Court (Kam) - Today at 7:45

I'M ACTUALLY KIND OF LOOKING FORWARD TO THE EARTH TRIP, HONESTLY. I'VE BEEN DOING "RESEARCH". IS IT TRUE THE SUN DOESN'T BURN YOUR SKIN THERE???? WHAT DO THE HUMANS DO AT NIGHT? IS IT TOO COLD, THEN, FOR THEM TO THRIVE? IS THAT WHEN THEY SLEEP, OR IS THAT WHEN THEY GET THE MOST OF THEIR WORK DONE?

eridan | mags - Today at 7:47

god you really are excited for it huh

Court (Kam) - Today at 7:48

FAR BE IT FROM ME TO SHOW ACTUAL EXCITEMENT, YOU KNOW. HEH. DEFINITELY, THOUGH. WHY SHOULD I NOT BE? I'M SPENDING TIME IN A NON-MURDEROUS PLACE WITH AN ACTUAL, HONEST TO GOD, NON-MURDEROUS FRIEND. LIKE HOLY ACTUAL FUCK, THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN OFTEN ENOUGH. EXCITED? EVERYTIME I THINK ABOUT IT I KIND OF JUST... THROW MY HANDS IN THE AIR. WHAT AM I GONNA DO? I GOT NO FUCKING CLUE. BUT IT'LL BE GOOD, I'M SURE.

eridan | mags - Today at 7:50

wwell good ill try my best to make it good for you so you get to havve a fuckin break for once but yeah its kinda flipped on earth wwhich i still cant get used to to be honest i havve the wworst sleepin problems the sun feels great there but i still cant bring myself to sleep normally at night

Court (Kam) - Today at 7:51

ALLOW ME TO SHOW A SMIDGEN OF CONCERN AND CARE FOR YOU BUT, HEY, I DON'T CARE IF WE DON'T EVEN LEAVE YOUR HIVE. I'LL RAID YOUR FOOD STORAGE BLOCK AND CRASH ON THE COUCH AND MAYBE WATCH YOU DO SHIT AND WE'LL BE GOOD. HELL, IT FEELS "GREAT"? CAN'T WAIT TO FIND OUT WHAT THAT FEELS LIKE. OUR SCHEDULES ARE KIND OF FLIPPED ANYWAYS, HONESTLY. WE TRAVEL DURING THE DAY A LOT, BECAUSE MOST TROLLS (ORPHANERS AND THE LIKE,) WON'T TRAVEL DURING DAY, SO WE GET A HEADSTART ON THEM. CAN'T OUTRUN THE DRONES THOUGH. MISERABLE EXCUSES FOR ORGANICS. JUST HAVE TO HOPE THEY DON'T CHASE US, DOESN'T SEEM LIKE IT SO FAR. I THINK WE LOST MOST OF THEM WHEN THEY RAIDED KANAYA'S HIVE AND RAZED IT TO THE GROUND? BACK WHEN I GOT MY SECOND CONCUSSION... OR FIRST, I'M NOT SURE, THAT PART IS KIND OF. BLURRY. IT WAS A LOT OF WAITING IN A DARK, WATERY CAVE. NO, SECOND, ACTUALLY. OR MAYBE, AN EXCARBATION OF THE FIRST, BECAUSE I GOT THAT ONE WHEN I GOT SLAMMED INTO A WALL BY A DRONE, EARLIER THAT... WEEK? LIKE THREE CYCLES BEFORE THE HIVE-RAZING, AND THEN I GOT HIT IN THE HEAD AGAIN WHEN WE WENT DOWN THE ROCKY WATER SLIDE OF DEATH WHEN THE DRONES ATTACKED THE HIVE. OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. LIKE I SAID. BLURRY.

eridan | mags - Today at 7:56

ok this is a lot first off wwere absolutely gonna go outside and do cool shit ill showw you the city and stuff like theres this space needle that ivve honestly nevver been on evven though ivve been livvin here for a wwhile but you should see it its like a huge towwer wwhere you can see the entire city from its supposed to be real pretty but its also real pricey so i wwas nevver interested second howw the fuck do you evven travvel at day dont you get burns or anythin isnt that shit dangerous i mean yeah its dangerous already for you to travvel at night but like i dont knoww be safe ok readin shit like this makes me wwanna practise usin my rifle again honestly

Court (Kam) - Today at 7:59

IT WAS WORSE WHEN WE HAD TO TRAVEL THROUGH THE DESERT.

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:01

I BOUGHT REALLY NICE SUN GEAR BEFORE HAND, AND I ALREADY HAD MOST OF MY BLISTERS IN THE TWO-HOUR TREK TO TEMP'S HIVE BEFOREHAND. I GUESS, ONCE YOU BLISTER UP ENOUGH, YOUR SKIN GETS USED TO IT. THEN YOU JUST SWEAT TO DEATH. I'M STILL 99% SURE WE'VE ALL SHORTENED OUR LIFESPANS BY SOME DEGREE, THOUGH. UNFORTUNATE BUT COULDN'T BE HELPED. BURNS GET CAUSED BY THE CONTACT OF THE HEATSOURCE TO YOUR SKIN- IF YOU GET TOO HOT, YOU BAKE AND BLISTER UP BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY BURN, WITHOUT ACTUAL EXPOSURE TO THE RAYS OF THE SUN, LIKE WHEN YOU WEAR HEAT GEAR. WITHOUT IT, OH YEAH. HELL YEAH, YOU ABSOLUTELY BURN AND IT'S HORRIFIC, BUT WE'RE ALL PAST THAT POINT. WE'VE BEEN ON THE ROAD FOR.... ALMOST HALF A SWEEP? WE TRY TO FIND SHADE WHERE WE CAN. RIGHT NOW IT'S COLD AND PATCHY SNOW SOMETIMES, WHEN THE SUN ISN'T OUT. IT'S SOMEWHAT TOLERABLE THIS FAR NORTH, THE SUN I MEAN.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:06

howw the fuck are you not dead yet holy shit

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:06

TEMP REFERS TO ME AS A "BRICK WALL SHITHOUSE".

eridan | mags - Today at 8:06

pretty accurate can i ask you somethin though howw did all of this start the runnin i mean

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:15

I ACTUALLY PASSED OUT ONCE IN THE DESERT, WHILE WE WERE TRAVELING TO KANAYA'S HIVE, AND TEMP HAD TO CARRY ME. ALSO, YEAH. THIS IS TOP SECRET SHIT, OKAY?

eridan | mags - Today at 8:16

god

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:16

DON'T JUST GO TELLING THIS SHIT TO JUST ANYONE.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:16

i dont evven knoww wwho to tell honestly

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:16

I GUESS TEMP PINGED HER BATTLESHIP.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:16

they cant really do much wwith this information

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:17

GOT EVERYTHING. LOCATION COORDINATES, CABIN ROSTER, EVEN THE FUCKING MENU FOR THE FOOD LINE. ANNNDD I GUESS TEMP FIGURED OUT HIS ANCESTOR IS THE UNWILLING PILOT FOR THAT SHIP. OBVIOUSLY SHE DIDN'T LIKE THAT SOMEONE GOT THROUGH THE SECURITY ON HER SHIP. BUT BEFORE SHE DID ANYTHING, TEMP CAME TO ME, AND I NOT-SO-LIGHTLY SUGGESTED WE LEAVE TOWN. AS WE LEFT HIS HIVESTEM, WE SAW THE GAGGLE OF HIGHBLOODS IN UNIFORM FORCING ALL THE PSIONS THEY COULD FIND OUT OF EVERY BLOCK IN THE NEARBY VICINITY AND INTO CHAINS. TEMP DIDN'T THINK SHE WOULD BE THAT QUICK IN PINPOINTING HIS LOCATION BUT I FUCKING KNEW BETTER. ANYWAY, HE COULDN'T SIT WITH THE IDEA THAT HE'D CAUSED THESE THIRTY-SOMETHING PSIONIC TROLLS TO BECOME ENSLAVED OR TO REACH AN EARLY ASCENSION AND RITES OR WHATEVER, SO I BASICALLY WENT IN AND KNOCKED THE SHIT OUT OF SOME OF THE FUCKS, BROKE THE BINDINGS, AND JUST FUCKING RAN. BUT THEN THEY KNEW WHAT I LOOKED LIKE, SO WE WERE BOTH RUNNING FROM HER AND FROM THE LOCALS.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:23

so basically it wwas your mate bein a curious idiot that got you into this situation

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:23

WE WENT BACK TO MY HIVE, RAIDED MY SHIT, AND THEN WE CROSSED THE CITY IN THE SEWERS FOR THE DAY AND THEN HEADED OUT OF TOWN, STAYED AT A MOTEL FOR A FEW NIGHTS, AND HEADED OUT TO THE DESERT, AND THERE'S JUST A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT I'D RATHER NOT TALK ABOUT FROM THERE. IT'S MOSTLY BULLSHIT ABOUT THE COVERUP OF WHAT I'M DUBBING THE ANCESTRAL REVOLT AND THE WRONGFUL IMPRISONMENT AND SLAUGHTER OF THOSE WHO PARTICIPATED IN IT. TEMP'S JUST ALL WOUND UP BECAUSE HIS ANCESTOR IS STILL ALIVE AND SUFFERING AND GOD. I MEAN DIP'S ALL WELL AND GOOD, HE'S GOTTEN US OUT OF A FEW PICKLES SO FAR. BUT MESSAGES ARE SPARSE, AND IT WORRIES TEMP, I GUESS. BUT YEAH, BASICALLY.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:25

so wwhats your plan are you just gonna run forevver

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:26

DO YOU WANT THE LONG ANSWER OR THE SHORT ONE.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:26

givve me the long one im invvested

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:27

WE JUST RECENTLY LEARNED THAT SHE'S CALLING ALL THE PSIONS TO HER IN A CLASS-ACT LEVEL OF BULLSHIT, EVERY SINGLE!! FUCKING!! PSION!! INTERPLANETARY SHIPPING IS HALTED, SHE'S LAID SIEGE TO ALTERNIA ITSELF IF WE CAN'T GET THE RESOURCES WE NEED FROM OTHER PLANETS EFFECTIVELY. SHE'S REARRANGED THE CLASSES OF THE STELLAR-CLASS PSIONS AND BASICALLY RESTRUCTURED THE ENTIRE ALTERNIAN TRANSGALACTIC FLEET'S INFRASTRUCTURE JUST TO KEEP DIPSHIT ALIVE. SO RIGHT NOW, WE'RE SCRAMBLING TO GET THE MESSAGE OUT. ANYONE WITH POWER NEEDS TO GET OUT OF THEIR HIVES AND GET UNDERGROUND BEFORE THEY GET BROUGHT UP INTO THE STARS TO BE USED UP AND THROWN AWAY. SHE'S EVEN TAKING EGGS, IF DIPSHIT IS TO BE BELIEVED. NO PSIONICS ARE TO BE LEFT ON ALTERNIA, AND EVERYWHERE ELSE THEY'RE ABOUT TO BECOME A CLASS A SCARCE RESOURCE.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:29

wwho the fuck evven is that dipshit youre talkin about

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:29

WHICH MEANS TEMP AND AA JUST BECAME SUPER VALUABLE TO ANYONE LOOKING. HE'S HER PILOT, THE ONE TEMP CONTACTED. I'D SAY HIS PROPER TITLE BUT I'VE GOT TO BE CAREFUL WITH BUZZWORDS.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:30

wwell alright

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:30

ANYWAY! SO WE'RE TRYING TO GET THE WORD OUT TO HIGHBLOODS ABOUT THIS CLASS A RESOURCE THING, SO THEY WANT TO KEEP THEIR PSIONICS ON THE PLANET, AND TO THE REST, TO KEEP HIDDEN. ANYWHERE IS BETTER, BUT IF THEY GET INTO ORBIT, THEY'RE BASICALLY DEAD IN THE WATER. IT'S THE GENOCIDE OF AN ENTIRE FUCKING CLASS, IT'S WHAT SHE'S TRYING TO DO, ALL TO KEEP HER PRIZE FROM SAID ANCESTRAL REVOLT. ANYWAY!! MY PERSONAL GOAL IS TO LEARN MORE ABOUT MY OWN ANCESTOR AND HOW HE TIED INTO ALL THIS, BUT I GUESS WE'VE GOT MORE IMPORTANT THINGS TO PLAN, LIKE HOW WE'RE GOING TO GET NEWS LIKE THIS SHIT OUT ON A MASS SCALE. I'M THINKING OF GETTING SOME SORT OF RADIO TRANSMITTER AND GETTING THE WORD OUT FOR OUR STATION NUMBERS OR WHATEVER. LONG TERM, TEMP WANTS TO FREE DIPSHIT. SO I GUESS WE'RE GONNA BAIT THE EMPRESS PLANETSIDE. AND THEN... I DUNNO. WE'LL FIGHT, I GUESS. SHE'S SO FAR OUT, THOUGH, THAT'S THE PROBLEM.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:34

do you really actually think youvve got a chance against the condesce

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:34

IT'LL TAKE /SWEEPS/ TO BRING HER THIS WAY, PROBABLY, UNLESS SHE PUTS DIPSHIT AT RISK, AND TEMP DOESN'T WANT THAT AND NEITHER DO I. MAYBE NOT NOW, BUT BY THE TIME SHE GETS HERE? I'M HOPING. I MEAN, IF ALL ELSE FAILS, I'LL STAND IN THE DIRECT SUNLIGHT IN MIDDAY, WITH ALL MY RESISTANCE TO IT, AND CHALLENGE HER OUT? HAHAH. ... HONESTLY...? I THINK MY PRIORITIES LIE MORE WITH THE REST OF ALTERNIA. TEMP CAN WORRY ABOUT DIPSHIT ALL HE WANTS. BUT FOR THE REST OF US? I THINK THAT'S GOING TO BE MY MAIN CONCERN. ALL INTERPLANETARY SHIPPING IS GOING TO STOP FOR A WHILE- WE'RE SWITCHING TO FOSSIL FUELS FOR FUCKS SAKE!! SO RESOURCES ARE ABOUT TO BECOME EXTREMELY RARE, AND I NEED TO STOCK UP AND MAKE SURE WE HAVE WHAT WE NEED TO SURVIVE THE NEXT FEW MONTHS. I'VE ALREADY PUT THROUGH MY ORDER THROUGH SOME OF MY LESS REPUTABLE CONTACTS, SO I THINK WE'LL BE FINE, BUT IT'LL BE ROUGH, PROBABLY. SO THAT'S THE LONG VERSION OF THE MAIN PLAN.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:39

this is this is fuckin stupid howw can you think you can change somethin wwhy do you think its YOUR job to help evveryone your biggest concern should be that you and maybe youre friends are safe like fuck the rest they nevver did anythin FOR you and i doubt they evver wwill just get out of this fuckin place this plan is bound to fail and youll pay wwith your fuckin life

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:40

YOU MISUNDERSTAND ME, DAC. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ANYONE BESIDES MY GROUP, AND THE PEOPLE MY GROUP CARES ABOUT. TEMP HAPPENS TO CARE ABOUT THE CODEJOCKEYS, THE ONES I SAVED EARLIER FROM THE HIGHBLOOD ROUNDUP? AND I CARE ABOUT FAVORS. YOU GIVE ENOUGH INFORMATION OUT, PEOPLE ARE GONNA WANT TO KEEP YOU AROUND. IT'S... INSURANCE. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME. WE NEED A NETWORK.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:42

wwell then fuckin knock that care out of him and get off this stupid fuckin planet before you actually die you dont need a netwwork you need a safe place

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:42

WE NEED PLACES TO STAY, THINGS TO EAT, PLACES TO RUN, AND YOU CAN'T GET THAT WITHOUT GIVING SOMETHING.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:42

this is not goin to wwork do you understand me

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:42

DAC. I HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEAR, BUT I LOVE HIM, AND I'M GOING TO STAND WITH HIM.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:43

youre goin to die for it both of you

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:43

I MAY WANT TO GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT MORE THAN YOU THINK. BUT HE WON'T. HE'S HERE FOR THE LONG HAUL, AND I... I THINK HE CAN DO IT.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:43

if you really cared about your mate youd get him to safety

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:43

BUT HE NEEDS SOMEONE TO BE BY HIS SIDE. DON'T SEND ME ON A GUILT TRIP, BECAUSE I'VE BEEN THERE ALREADY, I TRIED THAT. I KNOCKED HIM OUT SO HE WOULDN'T FIGHT THE DRONES, AND SENT HIM DOWN THE WATERY ROCK SLIDE OF DEATH SO HE WOULD SURVIVE AND I WOULD FIGHT THEM.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:44

try harder maybe

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:44

HE JUST GOT MAD AT ME.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:44

temp is insane

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:45

YEAH, HE IS. BUT I BELIEVE IN HIM ANYWAY.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:45

yeah cause youre goddamn stupid

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:45

I'D DO THAT FOR ALL OF MY FRIENDS.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:45

stupid is wwhat you are both of you

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:45

INCLUDING YOU, YOU KNOW. ALL YOU'RE DOING IS MAKING ME FEEL BAD, AND IT'S NOT GOING TO YEILD ANY RESULTS OTHER THAN "I CAN'T TRUST DAC WITH PERSONAL INFORMATION".

eridan | mags - Today at 8:46

im makin you feel bad cause i i nevvermind

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:48

I MEAN... I WANT TO BE ABLE TO TELL YOU SHIT WHEN YOU ASK, BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE ABLE TO FEEL LIKE YOU'RE JUST GOING TO TELL ME THAT WHAT I FEEL IS STUPID AND THAT I'M STUPID. BECAUSE THAT'S NOT A GOOD FEELING, KNOWING I'VE GOT TO DO THIS SHIT REGARDLESS, BECAUSE HE'S MY FRIEND AND... GOD, THE LENGTHS OF SHIT I'LL GO TO FOR HIM, I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND. IT JUST DOESN'T FEEL GOOD IF I TELL YOU SOMETHING AND YOU TELL ME THAT IT'S DUMB AND POINTLESS. I ALREADY KNOW THAT. I DON'T CARE, I'M NOT DOING IT FOR THE POINTLESS ASPECT OF IT, I'M DOING IT BECAUSE MY BEST FUCKING FRIEND, DUMPTRUCK OF SHIT THAT HE MAY BE, NEEDS ME TO. ANYWAY. YOU'RE RIGHT, THOUGH. IT IS STUPID, BUT LIKE I SAID. I DON'T CARE.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:50

yeah alright

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:50

SOMEONE'S GOTTA, AND I GUESS IT'S GOING TO BE ME, BECAUSE WITHOUT ME, TEMP WILL /DEFINITELY/ DIE. KANAYA MIGHT MAKE IT ON HER OWN, BUT SHE'S STILL TOO SECLUSIVE TO KNOW HOW TO HANDLE A BIG CITY, SAME WITH TEMP. BOTH OF THEM COULDN'T WEASEL THEIR WAY INTO AN UNDERGROUND FIGHTING RING IF THEY TRIED, AND I'D GET IN BASED ON MY LOOKS ALONE.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:53

yeah ok

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:55

TEMP SEES... THE SMALL PARTS OF THE PICTURE. HE'S GOOD WITH CODE AND GOOD WITH KNOWING HOW TO DO THINGS ON A SMALL SCALE. KANAYA'S GOOD WITH WEAPONS AND HAND TO HAND COMBAT, AND SHE'S A JADEBLOOD, WHICH MEANS SHE GETS EASIER ACCESS TO FOOD. PERSONALLY, I KNOW HOW TO FIGHT, AND I KNOW THE DREGS OF THE CITY LIKE THE BACK OF MY CALLOUSED HANDS. I CAN WANT TWO CRATES OF HIGHLY ILLEGAL SHIT AND KNOW EXACTLY WHO TO TALK TO AND WHERE TO GO TO GET THEM, I'VE ALREADY GOT A LITTLE NETWORK IN SOME CITIES WILLING TO BET BIG MONEY ON ME IN THE FIGHTS, AND MAKE SOME GOOD CAEGERS THAT WAY, AND I SEE THE BIG PICTURE. WHERE TO GO, ULTIMATELY. WHAT TO ASK. WHO WE NEED. WE ALL PULL OUR WEIGHT.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:56

alright

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:56

NEXT QUESTION?

eridan | mags - Today at 8:57

howw did you twwo start datin

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:57

I GOT AN ANON MESSAGE ON TUMBLR SAYING HE WANTED TO KISS ME, AND THEN IT KIND OF SNOWBALLED. HE HID FROM HIS FEELINGS FOR A WHILE AND WE TALKED IT OUT, AND I ENDED UP STORMING OUT THE DOOR BECAUSE SOME PISSFACE WANTED TO TALK TO ME ON ANON ABOUT THAT SORT OF NSFW BULLSHIT. YOU KNOW HOW THEY CAN GET.

eridan | mags - Today at 8:59

yeah

Court (Kam) - Today at 8:59

HE ENDED UP CHASING AFTER ME AND UH, HONESTLY I'M KIND OF A SUCKER FOR PEOPLE SHOWING THEY ACTUALLY WANT TO BE WITH A HOTBLOOD LIKE ME. MOST OF THE TIME PEOPLE... DON'T. I GUESS. PROBABLY. I ASSUMED IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS HEMOANONYMOUS BACK THEN, AND THAT SPELLS TROUBLE TO ANYONE WITH EYES?

eridan | mags - Today at 8:59

guess you got lucky there

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:00

BOY I THOUGHT I WAS HOT SHIT BACK THEN, ALL GREYED OUT AND SPECIAL.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:00

yeah

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:00

NOW IT'S JUST BECAUSE I'VE GOT A TINY-ASS LIFESPAN AND I'M A DEAD MAN IF MY COLOR EVEN COMES UP IN A SCANNER. AKA; TOO DANGEROUS TO WANT TO BE WITH, APPARENTLY. IT'S... NICE TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO SOMEONE ABOUT THIS SHIT, THOUGH. TEMP SOMETIMES BRUSHES IT OFF AND I FEEL WORSE. DON'T THINK HE WANTS TO FACE IT EITHER. YOU'RE A GOOD LISTENER.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:03

i try guess im good wwhen im not makin you feel like shit for openin up huh

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:03

YOU GOT IT, YEAH. ANY OTHER QUESTIONS, I GUESS? I'M OPEN TO ANSWERING.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:05

i cant really think of any to be honest you answwered evverythin i needed to knoww

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:06

ALRIGHT, WELL IS THERE ANYTHING YOU WANT TO KNOW LIKE, I DON'T KNOW. HOW TALL I AM. LIFE EXPERIANCES. WHAT'S THE BIGGEST TROLL I'VE EVER FOUGHT. THE MOST CAEGERS OR BEETLES I'VE EVER WON.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:06

howw old are you

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:07

NINE, NEARLY TEN. WHAT ABOUT YOU?

eridan | mags - Today at 9:07

wwell then youre evven younger than me

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:07

ALSO, YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT I LOOK LIKE, DO YOU. FUCK.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:07

recently turned ten though and yeah no i dont

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:07

I'LL UPLOAD SOMETHING TODAY OR TOMORROW OR SOMETHING.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:08

i wwas alwways satisfied wwith my imagination of you but yeah id like to see it

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:11

courtingGrievances [CG] sent file -wWzIKy1g.png- to [CA] at ??:?? DOES THAT SATISFY YOUR IMAGINATION?

eridan | mags - Today at 9:12

oh oh huh you dont you dont look as bad as i thought you wwould

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:12

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

eridan | mags - Today at 9:13

you look good is wwhat i mean

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:14

DID YOU HEAR THAT?? THAT WAS THE SOUND MY HEAD MADE AS I DROPPED MY PALMHUSK ONTO MY FUCKING FACE.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:15

wwhat wwhy

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:15

NO REASON. MY FINGERS ARE COLD. I'M SLIGHTLY TIRED. THERE WAS A WIND. I DON'T TAKE COMPLIMENTS WELL APPARENTLY.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:16

oh uh i mean i didnt say anythin really you just dont look bad you knoww and its a relief

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:16

A... RELIEF? HEY, WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT?

eridan | mags - Today at 9:21

im not friends wwith ugly people

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:21

WAIT, SO IF I WAS UGLY YOU WOULDN'T BE FRIENDS WITH ME? o:B

eridan | mags - Today at 9:22

probably i havve standards you knoww

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:23

I THINK THAT SUCKS. I'D MISS OUT ON YOUR PRESENCE BECAUSE I'D BE UGLY. NOT TO BE A FUCKING DOWNER OR ANYTHING. BUT I LIKE TALKING TO YOU, AND NOT BEING ABLE TO WOULD KIND OF SUCK.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:26

wwell you can be glad youre not then but really im not all that special

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:26

BUT ALSO, I DON'T THINK YOU MEAN THAT, BECAUSE YOU THOUGHT I WASN'T AS GOOD AS I LOOK. AND YOU STILL WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME. WANTED, I MEAN.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:27

people are glad wwhen they dont havve to talk to me

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:27

OKAY, LISTEN.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:27

wwell i thought you looked avverage

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:27

WE'VE BEEN TALKING PRETTY STRAIGHT FOR TWO WHOLE HOURS. IF I DIDN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU, I WOULDN'T BE. WELL, FUCK.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:28

i mean youre doin most of the talkin so

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:28

SOOOO I'M RIGHT.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:30

shrug wwhatevver you wwanna think honestly

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:33

I TIHNK I'M RIGHT, AND I WANT TO TALK TO YOU, BECAUSE, OCCASSIONAL JACKASSERY ASIDE, I THINK YOU'VE GOT POTENTIAL, DAC. ALSO; IF OCCASSIONAL JACKASSERY WAS A PAYING JOB, WE'D BOTH BE RICHER THAN THE EMPRESS HERSELF. HAHAH.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:41

i mean to be fuckin honest but also i really doubt and evven if i do havve potential it wwent to wwaste already

Court (Kam) - Today at 9:43

STILL HERE, AREN'T YOU? DOESN'T THAT POINT TO SOME INNATE SENSE OF NEED, OF WANTING TO BE MORE? THERE'S STILL SOMETHING LEFT IN YOU, BUD. PROMISE. EVERYONE'S GIVEN YOU SHIT AND SOMETIMES RIGHTFULLY SO, AND YOU GET KNOCKED DOWN A LOT, BUT YOU ALWAYS GET RIGHT BACK UP, YEAH? YOU'RE LIKE A FIGHTER. LIKE ME. I KNOW THIS ISN'T ALL YOU'VE GOT TO GIVE, YOU'VE JUST GOT TO FIND THE RIGHT PEOPLE TO GIVE IT TO. GOD. I NEED TO STOP TALKING, PROBABLY.

eridan | mags - Today at 9:59

no youre fine but uh i dont knoww i dont feel like much of a fighter wwhen i just you knoww do wwhat i gotta do

eridan | mags - Today at 10:00

you actually fight people and protect your friends and such wwhile i just do nothin

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:00

YOU FIGHT FOR YOURSELF. AND PROBABLY EVENTUALLY, SOMEONE ELSE TOO. YOUR QUADS, OR WHATEVER.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:01

wwhenevver i do its just outta place and unneeded and people get mad at me

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:06

I GET THAT. IT'LL CHANGE, EVENTUALLY. I'M RUNNING OUT OF WORDS, SORRY. IT'S BULLSHIT O CLOCK, BUT LISTEN... PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS GOING TO HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THE WAY OTHER PEOPLE DO THINGS. IT'S NOT THEIR JOB TO CHANGE YOU. IF YOU LIKE WHO YOU ARE, BE THAT. EVERYONE WHO CARES WILL LIKE YOU FOR YOU.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:08

evven if its my owwn kismesis gettin mad at me for protectin her a feww people called me manipulativve too just cause i wwanted her to be ok

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:23

WHAT DID YOU DO?

eridan | mags - Today at 10:25

someone wwas makin fun of her in public and tellin her howw she rules is awwful just cause she uses a lot of gifs of marie antoinette so i got mad and told him off but more people joined his friends probably and evventually she told me to shut up but i didnt wwant to and then i just got called manipulativve for wwantin to help her

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:26

THAT'S NOT HER GETTING MAD AT YOU FOR PROTECTING HER, THAT'S HER GETTING CONCERNED ABOUT YOU MAKING A FOOL OUT OF YOURSELF. WHEN THAT HAPPENS, YOU SHOULD MAKE YOUR STANCE KNOWN, BUT YOU SHOULDN'T PUSH IT. STAND UP FOR HER AND TELL THEM OFF, BUT DON'T REPLY FURTHER BEYOND SCORNFUL AND LAUGH-INDUCING GIFS RAGGING ON THE PEOPLE TRYING TO GET THE ONE UP ON YOU. WHAT PEOPLE ARE DOING WHEN THEY KEEP TRYING TO GET A RESPONSE OUT OF YOU IS TRYING TO MAKE YOU SLIP UP, MAKE A MISTAKE. GIVE THEM GIFS, NOT EFFORT, AND YOU SHOULD BE BETTER OFF.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:29

i still got a screenshot of wwhat someone said to me that kinda hit me - https://gyazo.com/7cee73e22a941c972692c37965269d1e - all i wwas tryin to fuckin do is protect her and evveryone wwas just against me suddenly it felt awwful karkat and i still cant get ovver it

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:30

YOU REMEMBER HOW YOU WERE MAKING ME FEEL BAD FOR DOING SHIT I FEEL LIKE I'VE GOT TO DO AND YOU WENT "IF YOU LOVED HIM, YOU'D DO THIS?"

eridan | mags - Today at 10:30

so next time i just back dowwn and let them make fun of her or wwhat

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:31

HOLD ON, LET ME FINISH THIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT FIRST.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:31

alright sorry im just ugh

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:32

THINGS IN THAT SORT OF FORMAT, LIKE "IF YOU LOVED HER, YOU'D DO THIS", AND "WOE IS ME, THIS BULLSHIT IS HAPPENING BECAUSE OF YOU" THAT MAKE SOMEONE FEEL BAD FOR THINGS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL, THAT'S GUILT TRIPPING. IT'S MAKING THEM FEEL GUILTY ABOUT THINGS THEY CAN'T CONTROL, OR THINGS THAT AREN'T THEIR FAULT. IT FUCKING SUCKS WHEN SHIT HAPPENS, BUT MOST PEOPLE DON'T CARE, AND THEY JUST GET OFFENDED AND PUT OUT WHEN YOU TRY TO TELL THEM SO LIKE THAT. YOU COULD TRY WORDING THINGS BETTER, LIKE... INSTEAD OF "YOU'RE GOING TO TURN ON ME TOO", YOU COULD SAY "I FEEL LIKE I'M ALONE HERE, ARE YOU AGAINST ME TOO?" OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. OR FOR THE SHIT WHERE YOU WENT, "IF YOU LOVED HIM, YOU'D DO THIS" BIT, YOU COULD JUST HAVE SAID "BUT DON'T YOU WANT TO SEE HIM PROTECTED TOO?". MOST OF THE TIME, PHRASING IT LIKE A QUESTION KEEPS THE GENERAL PURPOSE ALIVE WITHOUT BRINGING GUILT DOWN TO THE OTHER PERSONS HEAD.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:36

so the wwhole thing wwith her wwas actually my fault and i got wwhat i deservved

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:37

NEXT TIME THIS BULLSHIT HAPPENS, JUST GIVE THEM ONE RESPONSE OUTLINING YOUR THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ON THE SUBJECT; IE, YOU'RE NOT HAPPY WITH THE WAY THEY'RE TREATING YOUR MOIRAIL AND SHE CAN POST WHATEVER SHE WANTS, IT'S NOT THEIR JOBS TO JUDGE HER STYLE OF RULING BASED ON GIFS OF SOME FICTIONAL WOMAN. IF THEY TRY TO BRING IT FURTHER, RESPOND WITH A GIF OF SOMEONE YAWNING, OR ACT BORED OF THE CURRENT CONVERSATION, AND DON'T GIVE THEM MORE FUEL FOR THE FIRE. PICTURES ARE WORTH MORE THAN WORDS.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:38

shes my kismesis but yeah alright

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:38

AS FOR THE WHOLE THING WITH HER, I WASN'T THERE SO I CAN'T SAY FOR SURE, BUT IT SOUNDS LIKE YOU WERE IN THE RIGHT TO PROTECT HER, BUT WRONG TO CARRY IT SO FAR, AND YOU SHOULD HAVE QUIT WHILE YOU WERE AHEAD. I DON'T THINK IT WAS YOUR FAULT, THOUGH. ROSEREDMUTANT SOUNDS LIKE A FUCKING JACKASS.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:38

shrug evveryone sounds like a jackass wwhen they talk to me evveryone just treats me like dirt

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:39

THE MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU NEED TO LEARN, I THINK, IS WHEN TO STOP. THERE'S NO POINT BEATING A DEAD HORSE, AND IF YOUR KISMESIS SAYS STOP, YOU SHOULD SAY WHY, AND ASK HER TO BE HONEST. AND IF SHE TELLS YOU WHY, AND SHE'S HONEST AND TELLS YOU WHY AND IT'S A GOOD REASON, YOU SHOULD STOP, REGARDLESS, OR ASK HER TO COME MAKE YOU STOP. SHE'S YOUR KISMESIS FOR A REASON, IT'S HER JOB TO HELP KEEP YOU FROM FIGHTING WITH THE RIFFRAFF, TO DISTRACT YOU FROM OTHER FIGHTS AND MAKE YOU FOCUS ON HER. HER JOB TO HELP YOU IMPROVE YOURSELF THROUGH LEARNING WHAT BATTLES TO PICK, TO HELP YOU LEARN YOUR LIMITS, IN ARGUMENTS AND OTHERWISE.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:42

so i just kinda trust her and stop next time

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:43

IF SHE'S "BEGGING YOU TO STOP" AND NOTHING ELSE, SHE NEEDS TO LEARN TO USE HER WORDS, ALSO. THERE IS NOTHING IN THIS MULTIVERSE THAT CAN'T BE SOLVED THROUGH SOME SORT OF ARGUMENT OR CONVERSATION. YEAH, BASICALLY. SHIT SUCKS SOMETIMES BUT YOU DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO. TRUSTING HER WILL SHOW HER THAT YOU VALUE YOUR RELATIONSHIP.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:43

she didnt beg she just told me multiple times to back off and that its fine and she can deal wwith it on her owwn

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:43

HERE'S WHAT YOU SHOULD DO NEXT TIME.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:43

guess she doesnt like my help

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:43

OKAY, HOLD ON. YEAH, NO, THAT'S NOT RIGHT I MEAN. IT COULD BE POSSIBLE THAT SHE FELT LIKE YOU WERE VACCILATTING PINK, AND SHE FELT EXTREMELY DEFENSIVE ABOUT IT. YOU SHOULD TALK TO HER ABOUT THAT. BUT NO, IF SHE TELLS YOU TO STOP SOMETHING, SHE SHOULD AT LEAST HAVE A REASON, AND YOU'RE FUCKING QUADDED, SHE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING ALONE, AND NEXT TIME THAT SHIT HAPPENS. WHEN SHE TELLS YOU TO "STOP DEFENDING ME, BACK OFF, I CAN DO THIS ON MY OWN", YOU NEED TO TELL HER SOMETHING LIKE "I WILL BACK OFF BECAUSE YOU WANT ME TO AND I TRUST YOUR JUDGEMENT, BUT I NEED YOU TO TRUST ME ALSO" AND MAYBE SOMETHING LIKE "I NEED YOUR HELP TO BACK OFF, CAN YOU COME DISTRACT ME". BECAUSE, HAHA, THAT'S KIND OF HER JOB, AS YOUR KISMESIS, IS TO DISTRACT YOU FROM GETTING INTO SHIT YOU MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO HANDLE. EMOTIONALLY OR PHYSICALLY. THAT'S THE WHOLE FUCKING POINT OF KISMESITUDE.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:47

huh alright i nevver kneww that to be honest yeah i i guess ill havve to talk to her i dont knoww

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:48

HERE. https://fluffpuffandstuff.tumblr.com/post/156045666788/what-the-heck-am-ii-feeliing-labeliing-your

eridan | mags - Today at 10:49

i dont wwanna dig it up again but it might happen again and shrug

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:49

I SENT SOMETHING IN TO THIS E-ZINE AND I GOT THIS BACK, AND IT HELPED ME LABEL TEMP AND I INTO AN OMNIQUAD. YOU SHOULD READ IT TOO, ALRIGHT? AND EVEN IF YOU DON'T. HERE'S THE BASIC GIST. MATESPRITS PROTECT, KISMESIS' IMPROVE. MOIRAILS SOOTHE AND AUSPISTICES INTERVENE AS A TOPLEAF, AND WANT TO BE INTERVENED ON AS A BOTTOMLEAF.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:51

yeah i just got to that part

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:51

I'LL BREAK IT DOWN FOR YOU EVEN FURTHER IF YOU WANT, THIS SORT OF SHIT IS WHAT I USED TO THRIVE ON A FEW SWEEPS BACK, MARATHONING ROM-COMS LIKE THEY WERE THE HOTTEST NEW GAMEGRUB OF THE SEASONAL VENTURE.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:52

thats not all too surprisin to be honest hahaha but no i dont wwant to think about this more or else i just end up realisin i got flush feelins for my kismesis or somethin like that thatd just ruin things and make it evven wworse i just wwanted to be there cause i felt like as kismesises wwere a team you knoww

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:53

YOU WOULDN'T RUIN THINGS BY TALKING ABOUT YOUR EMOTIONS.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:53

yeah wwe hate eachother but also wwere still datin

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:53

EVERY, EVERY QUADRANT IS SUPPOSED TO TALK ABOUT THEIR EMOTIONS, JUST IN DIFFERENT WAYS.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:56

huh

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:56

IF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU VACILLATE, THEN TELL HER, GENTLY. IF SHE DOESN'T RETURN THEM, ASK IF THIS CHANGES ANYTHING. AND IF SHE SAYS YES, ASK HER, SPECIFICALLY, WHAT IT CHANGES. ASK HER (IN A DIFFERENT SENTENCE,) IF THIS CHANGES YOUR KISMESITUDE, AND IF SHE STILL /WANTS/ TO BE KISMESIS' WITH YOU. AND IF SHE SAYS NO. COME TO ME.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:56

no im not goin to do that

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:56

AND IF SHE SAYS YEAH, SHE STILL WANTS TO BE BLACK WITH YOU, THEN YOU'RE GOLDEN, AND NOTHING CHANGES. YEAH, NO, I DON'T BLAME YOU THERE. BETTER TO WAIT UNTIL YOU'VE GOT YOUR FEELINGS SECURELY LOCKED IN A BOX OR SOMETHING. THAT SHIT'S HEAVY.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:57

this could evven cause problems wwith my husband and im not into that

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:57

FAIR.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:57

ill just i guess talk to her about that stuff wwith that one fight that got out of hand but nothin more

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:58

JUST... ASK HER TO HELP YOU MORE WITH DISTRACTING YOU FROM FIGHTS YOU CAN'T HANDLE. USE THOSE WORDS.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:58

yeah ok

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:58

IF YOU CAN, APOLOGIZE FOR MAKING A SPECTACLE OUT OF YOURSELF. USE THOSE WORDS TOO.

eridan | mags - Today at 10:58

i dont like apologisin

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:58

ME EITHER. IT FEELS GROSS, DOESN'T IT?

eridan | mags - Today at 10:59

yeah

Court (Kam) - Today at 10:59

IT FEELS ALL... VULNERABLE AND SHIT.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:00

yeah i dont i dont like doin that so i rarely evver apologise i dont apologise if i dont gotta

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:00

YEAH. YEAH, YES. THAT BULLSHIT. IF I APOLOGIZE, I'M GENUINELY FUCKING FEELING IT, AND DITTO FOR YOU I'M ASSUMING?

eridan | mags - Today at 11:01

yeah actually lets start wwith it already sorry for uh dumpin this on you its not your job to do this i just i guess i cant help it i kinda wwhine to evverybody i dont knoww

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:02

DUDE, YOU'RE NOT WHINING. YOU'RE ASKING FOR HELP. THAT'S ALL A COMPLAIN OR A WHINE IS. IT'S THICKLY VEILED BUT THAT'S REALLY, WHAT IT COMES DOWN TO. YOU'RE HOPING SOMEONE WILL LISTEN AND DO SOMETHING TO STOP THE SOURCE OF YOUR WHINING, OR TO CONSOLE YOU AND HELP YOU FEEL BETTER ABOUT THE BULLSHIT THAT CAUSED THE WHINING OR COMPLAINING IN THE FIRST PLACE.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:03

i mean yeah but like its still not your duty you knoww i should be able to deal wwith my problems alone i guess god im just so pathetic

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:03

I SPENT HOURS WATCHING SHIT LIKE THIS AND YELLING AT THE CHARACTERS ON SCREEN, HONESTLY, I'M THE BEST PERSON FOR THE JOB, HAHA. UH, ALSO?? FUCK NO. DEALING WITH PROBLEMS ALONE FUCKING SUCKS. IT FEELS BAD AND YOU JUST GET FRUSTRATED BECAUSE YOU BURN OUT ON THAT SHIT. ASKING FOR HELP IS KEEPING YOU SANE AND KEEPING YOU SAFE. JUST FROWNED UPON IF YOU ASK ANYONE OTHER THAN PEOPLE CLOSE TO YOU.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:05

youre not my moirail though or evven my mate i shouldnt be talkin about this wwith you of all people

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:05

I'M NOT YOUR MOIRAIL OR YOUR MATE, YEAH, BUT I'M YOUR FRIEND. A GOOD ONE, I THINK, AT THIS POINT. FRIENDS GOTTA BE THERE FOR YOU.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:06

yeah i guess thanks

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:06

IF MATESPRITS PROTECT, KISMESIS' IMPROVE. MOIRAILS SOOTHE AND AUSPISTICES INTERVENE, FRIENDS LISTEN. THEY'RE THERE WHEN YOU NEED SOMEONE TO JUST LISTEN, AND MAYBE OFFER ADVICE. HONESTLY, I WISH I'D OFFERED THIS KIND OF ADVICE WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. MAYBE I COULD HAVE KEPT MY OLD FRIENDS BACK TOGETHER. MAYBE I'D ACTUALLY KNOW WHERE SOME OF THEM ARE. IF THEY'RE EVEN ALIVE.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:07

wwell at least you learnt from it and youre better noww

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:07

I HOPE I'M BETTER. I KIND OF FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING I'M SAYING IS GOING IN ONE FIN AND OUT THE OTHER, BUT YOU SEEM HAPPY WITH WHAT I'M GOING ON ABOUT.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:07

i dont knoww howw you used to be but i knoww youre good noww shrug still youre doin better than evveryone else i met before you so i guess theres that

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:08

... BETTER AT BEING A FRIEND? SHIT, I'M SORRY. YOU MUST HAVE HAD SOME PRETTY SHIT ONES BEFORE NOW, THEN.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:09

i dont just forget the things you say i got better about hemoism and i remember you havve a mate and i wwanna talk to fef about the shit and stuff friends relationships just evverythin

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:09

(:B

eridan | mags - Today at 11:10

but yeah thanks i guess im gonna take a nap i think

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:11

ALRIGHT. I... HOPE THIS WAS A GOOD CONVERSATION. SEEMED LIKE ONE TO ME, AT LEAST. SEE YOU LATER? I'M ALWAYS REACHABLE HERE... AND IF I DON'T RESPOND, SOMETHING'S PROBABLY UP. I'LL. UH. I'LL ADD YOUR MESSENGER HANDLE TO A LIST OF HANDLES ASSOCIATED WITH OUR DEADMANS SWITCH. SO IF SOME BULLSHIT HAPPENS, YOU'LL KNOW WHEN AND WHERE.

eridan | mags - Today at 11:17

oh wwell thanks thats good to knoww but yeah see you around

Court (Kam) - Today at 11:19

courtinggrievances [CG] has ceased trolling [CA?]

#chatlogs #eridacnis #posted privately to check some formatting things #god this is why i don't do the formatting and i let other people do it but im in a rush cause sleep calls me #read ooc #also #ask to tag

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canditeje084-blog · 5 years ago

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deberaepvr028-blog · 5 years ago

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star-trekkin-across-theuniverse · 7 years ago

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Cover You in Oil, pt 23

Word Count: 5127 Tags: @outside-the-government, @yourtropegirl @to-pick-ourselves-up-7, @ghostssss, @rampant-salamander, @saysay125, @sistasarah-sallysaidso @shewhorunswithfandoms, @flirtswithdanger @supermoonpanda @rayleyanns @anyakinamidala Author’s Note: Any errors in the Russian are solely my own shitty ability.

Sally processed through the hall toward the huge double doors, nearly frozen with fear and tension. She couldn’t remember ever feeling as nervous and anxiety-ridden as she did in that moment. Sasha must have sensed it, because he squeezed her hand to reassure her, and when she flicked her eyes in his direction, he winked.

“I’ve got you, kid,” he said. She swallowed and acknowledged him with a nearly imperceptible nod. As the grand doors of the hall swung open, Sally was overwhelmed by the cheering crowd waiting to see her. She took in the throngs of people, completely astonished by their numbers. She hadn’t thought that many people lived in Latveria. As she and Sasha stepped out, the crowd, on cue, surged forward, knocking over the barricades and swarming around them. The last thing Sally remembered seeing as she descended under the mass of bodies was Victor rising in the open-air carriage, a look of absolute rage and panic on his face.

She felt the crown pulled off, and the bracelets of state. Then the cloak. Soon, she was just in her coronation gown, a sea of hands pulling the symbols of office free from her body as they pushed her toward Sasha. He grabbed her by the shoulder and pulled her toward a sewer storm grate that had been pulled open, pushing her ahead of him and through the dark opening. Steady hands grabbed her legs and guided her down into the inky black tunnel. Sasha slipped through behind her.

“No lights,” A masculine voice said.

“I can’t see shit,” Sally complained.

“I’m so sorry, Your Majesty, but we would all prefer to stay anonymous.” The voice was sarcastic and Sally felt herself smile despite the irritation. She felt a hand at the base of her spine, and knew it was Sasha beside her.

“I’m gonna unzip the dress, Sally. The seamstress gave you a silk base layer, and then we have some winter clothes for you. I have to get changed too, but there’s someone here to help you,” he said.

“Thanks, Sasha,” she murmured.

“You should probably try to get used to calling me Bucky now,” he corrected. “We aren’t going back.” Sally felt his hand at the zipper, and the dress fell away from her easily. Before she could even try to adjust to the darkness, a sweater was thrust into her hands. She pulled it over her head and stepped out of the pool of dress at her feet.

“Lift your left leg,” the voice ordered. Sally did as she was bidden and felt the man take her boot off and slip a pant leg over her foot before pushing the boot onto her foot again. “Now your right.” She did the same, and again, boot off, pant leg on, boot replaced. He pulled the pants to her knees, and Sally brushed his hands away, pulling them the rest of the way.

“We have to get moving,” a second voice whispered.

“I’m ready,” Sally said, and allowed a strong grip to take her arm and lead her through the dark tunnels. Her eyes were slowly adjusting, and she was beginning to make out shadows, but nothing substantial. She recognized Bucky ahead of her, and knew there was at least one more person behind the man helping her. Bucky led them to a junction in the tunnel.

“Straight ahead will lead you to the baths, left will lead you to the edge of the city,” the man holding her arm said. “Mariya has a vehicle waiting. Be safe, godspeed.”

Bucky took her hand and pulled her down the left corridor, picking up his pace slightly. “As long as you can manage a quick pace, we’re going to haul ass, Sally.”

“I’ll manage,” she managed, through gritted teeth. Her leg was already throbbing, but she wasn’t about of acknowledge the pain she was having. Bucky sped up again, and Sally stumbled to keep up. He caught her easily and helped her along the tunnel, keeping their pace fast.

“We’re nearly there,” he assured her, as the follow the tunnel’s bends and curves. Finally, there was a faint light from a short candle, signaling where they needed to climb up. Bucky climbed up first, and checked the room before reaching down to help her climb through. They popped up in the backroom of Mariya’s bakery. Lying on the bench by the door was snowpants and coats, knit hats and gloves. They quickly dressed and Bucky cracked the door just a hair to assess the outside before opening it, and gesturing for Sally to get into the waiting vehicle. She climbed in first, and Bucky climbed in right behind her, pulling her down to the floorboards and throwing a blanket over her. Mariya looked back at them and offered a tense smile.

“You are ready?” She asked. Bucky nodded. “Then let’s go.” She pulled away from the bakery slowly, leaving the city by a narrow twisting road leading away from the mountains. Once they were beyond city limits, she turned down a barely used path. It had only been driven once or twice since the snow had fallen, and tracks were full of drifting snow. They slowed considerably as Mariya maneuvered the vehicle through the deep snow until they came to a small shack. She got out and trudged through the deep drifts until she got to the cabin and opened it up, checked it and then nodded back to Bucky.

“Let’s move, Sal,” he said, offering his hand so she could hop out of the vehicle. She followed in his footsteps to the cabin, overwhelmed by how slow going it was.

“This is going to take us forever,” she worried aloud. Bucky smiled in reassurance.

“We have a snow machine from here. This is Mariya’s family’s ancestral land, and no one, not even Victor, is supposed to trespass. With you missing, that will be moot, but Victor fears Mariya’s people, so hopefully this will stall him. Grab that pack. You’ll have to carry it while we head up the mountain, but once we’re on foot again, I’ll take it.” Bucky pointed at a backpack sitting on the floor. It matched their snow outfits. Everything looked like it had come from the military. Their snow gear was all off-white and non-reflective, like it was intended for snow maneuvers. Bucky led her to a dilapidated shed a short distance from the cabin, and climbed on the snowmachine inside. Sally noticed Mariya was hauling wood into the cabin and poked Bucky.

“What is she doing?”

“Creating her alibi,” Bucky answered as he revved the snowmachine’s engine. “She’s been up here for nearly a week already, hunting. The fire died down while she was in town, so she’s got to stoke it so it’s nicely banked before any of the Guard get here. She’s also got a nice deer hanging in the cold shed. Shot it last night, I guess.”

“How long has it been since we left the coronation?” She asked. Everything had happened so fast that her head was spinning.

“It was four minutes between the gutter to Mariya’s. Less than ten to the cabin.”

“I owe these people so much,” Sally breathed, unsure if Bucky would hear her.

“Sally,” he shook his head. “You’re their queen now. They’d do pretty much anything for you. That’s why we had to wait until after the coronation.”

“It’s been fourteen fucking minutes, Buck,” she exclaimed, staring at the back of his head in shock as they headed up the mountain. Bucky must have known where he was going because every time Sally looked back, the trees and snow looked the same, but the castle was smaller and smaller until she couldn’t make it out any more. Sally was unsure of the time that was passing, but there were storm clouds rolling across the sky, and the forest was growing dark.

“We’re nearly there,” Bucky called back to her, as they crested a ridge. Another small cabin came into view, with a plume of cheerful smoke rising from the chimney. Bucky pulled right into the storage shed and led Sally inside. “This is our last stop, and we hike from here. There’s no path for about four miles, and then there’s a well-beaten deer path. But until then, we’re on snowshoes. How is your leg holding up?”

“I’m fine,” Sally lied.

“You aren’t,” he countered. “Need something for pain?”

“No!” Sally shook her head. “I need a clear head for this. I will be fine, Bucky.”

“Then let’s get moving,” he said. “There’s an outhouse around the back. Make sure you go before we leave.”

Sally nodded, and met him back at the front of the cabin when she was done. He had his snowshoes on, and was just getting hers ready when a Servo-Guard dropped out of the sky into the snow in front of them.

“State your name.”

“Maxim Petrovich. This is my sister Anastasia Petrovna.” Bucky put the fake accent on again for the benefit of a robot.

“Identity cards?”

“They are in the cabin,” Bucky started. “I’ll just –“

“Database searched. Maxim Petrovich and Anastasia Petrovna, you will appear in lesser court in three days time to answer to the charges against you,” the Servo-Guard cut Bucky off.

“Charges?” Bucky looked confused.

“Absence from the coronation of the Empress. Dereliction of responsibility. Punishable by two weeks servitude to the Emperor.”

“Three days, at the lesser courts?”

“Affirmative.”

“We will be there to acknowledge our crimes,” Bucky acquiesced. The Servo-Guard shot back into the sky without another word. Sally let out her breath in a rush and stared at Bucky. “That was close.”

“That was ridiculous,” Sally agreed. “Let’s go before it realizes it should have double checked us.”

Bucky helped her into the snowshoes and gave her a quick lesson on how to use them before taking the backpack and tossing it on his back. He led her up the mountain, away from the cabin. Sally could feel exhaustion kicking in and as she forced her legs up the mountain, she cursed herself for not doing more hill training while she’d had the chance. They plodded along in silence until the deer trail. It was a beaten down, narrow track twisting up the mountain. In the distance, below them, Sally could see the ski hill where she’d had her accident. They had come a long distance already.

“At the risk of infuriating you, how much further is it?” Sally asked.

“How are you doing?” Bucky countered.

“I’m hungry. And tired,” she admitted. He flipped the backpack in front of him and pulled out a strip of something to hand to her.

“It’s jerky. Eat it, we can take five. We’ve got another three to four hours of hiking ahead of us before we pop over into Hungary,” he said. “Some of it is downhill.”

Sally discovered that Bucky mostly was lying when he said some of it was downhill. It was mostly creeping higher and higher into the mountains with the occasional few steps down an embankment. Her leg had been aching at the coronation hall, and by the time another hour had passed, it was on fire, and she was fighting to contain tears. Bucky was leading, so didn’t see the anguish on her face until she stumbled into him. He turned and caught her before she went face first into the snow, and helped her to sit on a fallen tree.

“You should have said something,” he admonished her.

“I didn’t want to say anything until I knew we were across the border.” Sally gritted her teeth and tried to push herself back to standing, but her leg gave out. “I didn’t actually believe until this moment that my leg had been broken.”

“I still don’t believe it has. I think all your pain is related to that soulmark,” Bucky shook his head. “Come on, I’ll carry you for a while. Climb on my back.” He slid the backpack off his back and handed it to her

“You are not piggybacking me up a mountain, Bucky.”

“You know they used nearly the same serum on me as Erskine used on Steve, right? Climb up,” he turned his back to her and squatted. Sally slung the backpack over her shoulders, and with a great deal of hesitance, wrapped her arms around Bucky’s neck and allowed him to pull her up on his back

“I feel ridiculous,” Sally complained.

“I won’t be as fast this way. If the weather changes, or we’re spotted, you’re going to have to push through the pain and hike,” Bucky said. Sally nodded against his back and kept lookout for the next hour.

The trees got more and more densely packed together the further they climbed, and Sally finally understood why this route wasn’t a concern to Victor. Who would want to climb through a maze of trees, scraping against needles and branches, just to get into Latveria? It hardly seemed worth it. She also understood where all the stories about werewolves and vampires came from, as the shadows playing across the trees made her skin crawl. Coupled with the occasional howl from a wolf, she was feeling a little spooked. Bucky suddenly laughed.

“What is so funny?” Sally snapped. Her pain was easing, but her temper was worn.

“I was in Latveria for close to a year,” Bucky started. “Never once did Victor ask me about my name.”

“I thought Alexandr was a common name?” Sally asked.

“Sure, it was. But don’t you think it should have sent up a warning flag that my last name literally translated as son of the vampire?” Bucky asked. Sally snorted.

“Really?”

“Yeah, in Russian. I didn’t know a lot of Latverian when I crossed the border. Enough that I could get by, but Latverian is kind of a patois or pidgin of Romanian, Hungarian and Russian, with a little Romany tossed in to make it interesting. I had crossed into the country from here, in the Carpathians, and thought it was a funny name. Mariya always said it would be the name that got me caught,” Bucky explained. Sally chuckled softly.

“You’ll miss her,” she commented.

“I probably will. Mariya’s a good woman,” Bucky nodded.

“Will she be caught? Punished?” Sally asked.

“Hopefully not, but she knew what she was doing,” Bucky shrugged, the action bouncing her on his back a little. “She wasn’t doing you any real favours, Sally. She didn’t really care what your outcome was, provided Victor suffered. You were just a catalyzing agent for her revolution.”

“I owe her a debt,” Sally was firm about it. Bucky shook his head.

“You really don’t. You gave her exactly what she was looking for. Instability it the house of Doom. She wants to topple his regime,” Bucky explained.

“And then what?”

“I didn’t ask,” he admitted. Then he laughed again. “I mean, I guess the reality is that the throne passes to you. It would be up to you what happens in Latveria at that point.”

“What?” She squawked. “I’ve run away. I can’t think of a clearer sign of abdication!”

“Until we can get you home and sorted, you are very much still the queen,” Bucky laughed. Their conversation had distracted both of them, and night had fallen around them, chilling the air and silencing the forest. Bucky paused, holding a finger to his lips to silence her questions. Sally’s curiosity about what had stopped him was sated when he threw her to the snowy ground and dropped on top of her, right as a bullet whizzed by their heads.

“What –“ Sally breathed. Bucky slapped his hand across her mouth.

“I think it’s a motion sensing defensive weapon. We’re only about half a click from the border now, and part of the function of the Servo-Guards is border protection. It would stand to reason that Victor had placed some up here. I hope we haven’t triggered a wake protocol,” he interrupted, hissing the words against her ear.

“If it’s motion sensing, how are we going to go that last half kilometer?” Sally breathed, careful to not put her voice behind the words.

“We’re going to have to run, in an erratic pattern,” Bucky replied.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Sally started thinking about what it would be like to die on the top of the Carpathians.

“You can do this, Sal. You go first. The goal is the peak up ahead. Once we crest it, the Servo-Guard will shut down, and we’ll be safe. It won’t know to try to identify us, it will only know that we’re too close to the border,” Bucky explained.

“Are you sure?” Sally asked.

“I hacked a great deal of Victor’s files,” he nodded. “Whenever you’re ready, my queen.”

“Oh, fuck off, Bucky.” Sally shoved his shoulder, and he rolled off her, a ridiculous smirk on his face. Sally shook her head. Even in the face of danger. Or maybe because of it, he was laughing. It was no wonder he was a legend. She rolled onto her stomach and pushed herself into a crouch slowly, trying to track where the robot had gone. Bucky tapped her shoulder and pointed to the right, down the hill. Once Sally saw it, she nodded, and got her good leg placed so she would get strength and speed from pushing away. It was going to be hard going through the snow, but it was no longer deep snow due to how close the trees were. Between the trees and the snow though, Sally was sure her path would be erratic. But it was also going to be dangerous.

She took a deep breath and pushed away from the ground, focusing on keeping her eyes on the crest of the hill and weaving in and out of the trees. She could hear something or someone behind her and just kept running, not wanting to know if it was Bucky or the Servo-Guard. She felt a burning pain in her good leg and nearly toppled, crying out, but forced herself to keep going. She glanced over her shoulder and couldn’t see Bucky but could see the Servo-Guard gaining on her. Sally’s heart was hammering in her chest as she forced herself to run, fully exerting herself. Her lungs were on fire. Suddenly, she felt someone grab her arm and tug her ahead and looked up into Bucky’s concerned blue eyes.

“Focus on running. Don’t think about the pain,” he yelled, hauling her along. As they neared the crest, two shadows emerged and Sally sagged. They were caught. Something whizzed past her head, and a strange metallic pop sounded behind her. She glanced back and saw the first Servo-Guard tipping backward, an arrow embedded in its chest. Her head shot back to the top of the mountain, and she could barely make out the silhouette of a bow.

“Clint?” She called.

“Move your ass, Sally!” He hollered, nocking another arrow. “There’s about a dozen closing in fast!”

Muzzle flash to the left of Clint made her narrow her eyes as she continued to push herself forward, half limping, half being dragged by Bucky.

“I just took out two, Clint,” a feminine voice laughed. Natasha. Sally dug deep and pushed herself forward. She was nearing collapse, and there was another biting sting, this time on bum, just above her thigh.

“Just a few hundred feet more, Sally, come on!” Bucky encouraged her. “We’ve got cover now, you can slow down if you need to.”

“Now this, Nat? This is like Budapest!” Clint laughed, releasing another arrow into the darkness.

“You’re right, we do remember Budapest very differently!” Natasha called back, firing her weapon again. Sally collapsed, finally too exhausted to go on. She could barely catch her breath, and everything hurt. Bucky scooped her up, slung her over his shoulder and kept moving, until finally they hit to top of the hill, and he started running down the other side.

“Why are you still running?” Sally asked, watching as Natasha and Clint started to retreat, eyes still on Latveria.

“Those Servo-Guards seem pretty fucking determined for a motion detection protocol. They know it’s us!” Bucky speculated, continuing. “These ones have probably identified us, and they will cross the border. Any reinforcements will stop until they can positively ID us, and then they’ll come across too.”

Natasha and Clint picked off the last three robots, one by one. They turned and started to run, trailing just a little behind Sally and Bucky. Bucky led them down the mountainside, weaving into a dense copse of trees to lose the sighting ability of the Servo-Guards. After he’d led the group of them for about ten minutes, he finally slowed down, carefully dropping Sally on the snowy ground. Sally flinched and tried to push herself back up.

“Let me see the wounds, Sally,” Bucky demanded.

“What wounds?” She asked.

“You were shot. At least twice. I need to get the bullets out.” Bucky pulled the backpack off her and pulled out a field medic’s kit. Sally eased herself over so Bucky could look at her thighs. He poked at the painful spot on her thigh and on her bum, causing Sally to shriek and try to get away.

“I’m sorry, Sally. I gotta get these out,” Bucky apologized. “They could have trackers in them.” He drew up a syringe of something and jabbed her in the thigh. Soon, the pain in the area was gone. Natasha and Clint caught up as Bucky was cutting away the fabric around the wound in her thigh.

“Shot in the ass. Totally Budapest,” Natasha nodded at Clint.

“Shot in the thigh. More like Rio,” he countered, flopping into the snow beside Sally. “Other than the lead in your ass, how are things?”

“That’s one hell of an opening line,” Sally laughed weakly. “Strangely, my ass hurts. Thanks for coming you guys.” Sally looked up at Natasha, who was staring at Bucky.

“Вы? Ты Саша?” Natasha was pale, like she was shocked. Sally doubted that happened often.

“Не сейчас, маленький паук,” Bucky warned, not looking up from Sally’s thigh.

“Хуй тебе!” Natasha rolled back on her heels and looked like she was about to light into him.

“Не сейчас, Наталья!” Bucky snapped, holding a bloody hand up. “I’m trying to patch up our friend.”

“Our friend?” Natasha retorted. “Do you even have friends?”

“I have at least two.”

“Sally, are you sure –“

“I know exactly who Bucky is, Natasha. He told me everything,” Sally groaned from the forest floor.

“Even that he shot me?”

“Why would he need to tell me that to help me escape?” Sally asked. “He told me he was a weapon. He’s not a weapon anymore.”

“Another shot, Sal,” Bucky interrupted as he stuck the needle into her again. Natasha fell silent and glared at Clint like she was trying to tell him something.

“Wait, dude there is the Winter Soldier?” Clint asked, suddenly cluing in. His bow came back up, trained on Bucky. Bucky sighed. Sally flinched, causing him to back off the stitches and look at her.

“Clint, do you trust me?” She asked him.

“Well, I don’t know about trust, but you did a damn fine job on my car,” he hedged. Bucky realized the flinching wasn’t his first aid and got back to his field medic work.

“Would you trust another vehicle in my care?” She pressed.

“In a heartbeat, kid,” he nodded.

“And are we friends?” She asked.

“Our bromance will go down in history as the most bromantic of bromances,” Clint smirked.

“I’m going to assume a certain level of trust then, Clint,” Sally started. “The only reason I am here is Bucky. Not even a word of a lie. If it hadn’t been for him, Tony would be risking another Sokovia to rescue me. He’s not who he was.”

Clint relaxed his draw and quivered his arrow. Natasha shook her head and squatted beside Bucky, watching him patch Sally up. “Do you want me to call in Tony now?”

“While my ass is in the air and another man’s hands are all over it? I don’t think that’s a great plan, do you?” Sally winked. Natasha laughed.

“It’s good to see your humour is intact,” she smiled. “But I’m going to have to notify the team that we’ve got you. And Tony isn’t going to wait once I do.” She turned away and held her hand to her ear, speaking quietly as Bucky finished dressing Sally’s wound. Sally pushed herself onto her back and sat up, flinching at the pinching pain where the freezing was starting to wear off. She hugged Bucky, impulsively, and she felt him stiffen. Pushing him away, she took her time assessing him, and saw that he’d also taken at least one bullet in the upper thigh.

“Bucky! Why didn’t you say something?” Sally accused. Natasha turned back to face them, and Sally gestured at the blood dripping down Bucky’s leg. “I don’t know how to fix that.”

“I can,” Natasha offered. She made quick work of cutting back Bucky’s pants and assessing the wound. “This is already healing.”

“I’ve had the serum,” Bucky admitted.

“The serum?” Clint asked.

“The KGB worked with Hydra to replicate the super soldier serum. It was rumoured that the Winter Soldier was the result of that, but there were never any records that could support that,” Natasha explained. Bucky nodded.

“How’s your pain tolerance then?” She asked. “Because I’m gonna have to dig this out.”

“Do what you have to do, маленький паук,” Bucky nodded. Natasha pressed her lips together in a tight line and used her boot knife to cut into his skin, lodging the blade just below the bullet and popping it out. Bucky cursed under his breath. Sally closed her eyes and looked away, a wave of nausea threatening to make her sick.

“Clint, pass me some gauze?” Natasha asked, and pressed the gauze against the wound. “Sorry. I didn’t think about the pain.”

“It’ll pass,” Bucky shrugged. “Let’s get moving.” He pushed himself to his feet and offered Sally a hand. She took it, allowing him to pull her to her feet, and they continued down the mountain, slower than they’d been. Bucky wasn’t impeded at all by his injuries, but Sally’s bullet wounds, coupled with the freezing and the existing issue with her leg, was hobbling, and it was slowing everyone down. The adrenaline was finally starting to wear off, and Sally was spent. She was not some specially powered human. It was not her job to participate in covert operations. And her body was making it clear that it was angry with her. She had no energy left.

“How are you doing, Sally?” Clint asked. She shook her head, her eyes filling with tears.

“I can’t do this,” she managed, dragging in a deep breath.

“You’ve done it. We just need to get you home,” Clint argued.

“I’m tired, Clint. I’m freezing cold. There’s a pain in my ass like a bee stung me, but apparently it’s a bullet wound. And my leg really hurts. I can’t do this,” she cried. Clint pulled her into his arms.

“And I’m telling you right now, this is the easy part. You already completed the hard part. Come on. I’ll help you,” Clint rubbed her back as he spoke. “Nat, take the rear. I’m gonna help Sally down this fucking mountain.”

“I can carry her,” Bucky offered. “I did earlier.”

“I got this one,” Clint shook his head. He collapsed his bow with a flick of his wrist, and snapped it onto his quiver before scooping Sally up into his arms. “Dry those tears, Sally. We’ve got you.” Bucky stepped through the snow to them, and tucked Sally’s hair back under her cap.

“I’ve got something you should probably have,” Bucky said, reaching into his coat. He pulled off Sally’s glove, and reached into his pocket to pull out her engagement ring. “Safe and sound. Just like you.” He then handed her her phone. “It’s time for you to call your man, and let him know you are safe. Natasha has already informed the team, but he really needs to hear it from you.”

“How did you –“

“Because if you were my girl, I’d need to hear it,” Bucky said. “Call him.”

Sally looked at the phone in her hand, suddenly nervous, worried and conflicted. More than anything, she wanted to hear Tony’s voice. But not over the phone. She wanted to hear it because he was standing in front of her, taking her from Clint’s arms into his own.

“Do you want me to tell him to come, Sally?” Natasha read her mind. Sally nodded and laid her head against Clint’s chest as they continued down the mountain. Natasha stepped away and spoke quietly, her back turned. She caught up a few minutes later, walking backward down the hill beside them, her eyes on the trees behind them. “They’re on their way.”

Sally nodded and leaned into Clint. “How long?” Clint asked.

“They’re climbing up. Tony said he doesn’t want to put the suit on unless he has to.”

Bucky continued to lead them down the mountain, the night getting colder and darker. Sally tried to concentrate on anything other than the pain shooting through her leg, watching the trees pass, eventually looking up to watch the stars, silent the whole time. She could feel pressure lifting from her chest as they made their way out of the higher altitude, and slowly, she also could feel herself beginning to relax, the tension leaving her muscles, secure in the knowledge she was with friends and Tony was on her way to her.

Finally, a light flashed through the trees below them, and Sally’s heart started thumping wildly.

“Put me down,” she demanded. Clint wasn’t expecting her to speak, and didn’t hear her. “Clint! Put me down.” He eased her to her feet and Sally started slowly, painfully walking toward the telltale flicker of the flashlight, the other three staying close by. The light flashed across her quickly, and then flashed back and stayed, causing her to raise her hand to block the blinding brightness. And then the light was gone, and the noise crashing through the woods was overwhelming. And Sally was enveloped in a suffocatingly tight embrace.

“I thought I would never see you again. I thought I would die without you.” His words tore into her. “You’re finally safe.”

The burning pain that had been confined to her leg since the accident tore through her entire body, burning her from the inside out, and she collapsed, limp, in Tony’s arms.

#avengers fanfic #tony stark x OFC

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