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A most unusual plant
(Picture from The Official Witcher Wiki)
“Geralt, do you hear this?”
“A cow. You have heard cows moo before, haven’t you, Jaskier?” Geralt asks.
“I know it’s a cow. But it sounds scared. It might need help!”
“And how is that our problem? Since when do I look like a farmer to you?”
“Geralt, the poor animal might be in mortal danger! We cannot just ride past it and leave it to a most horrible fate. All kinds of monsters are lurking in the nearby swamps, you said so yourself just yesterday!”
“Hm. I might have exaggerated a bit,” Geralt admits. “Just to make sure you stay on the track and don’t run off flower picking or looking for berries. Remember the hirikka you thought was so cute? During the dragon hunt?”
“Before you left me alone on top of that mountain, you mean?” Jaskier asks, although he, of course, knows exactly what Geralt is talking about. “And the hirikka was cute - until Sir Eyck cut its head off, poor thing. Now, what about the cow? Are you going to rescue it, Witcher, or do I have to do it all by myself?”
Summary: Jaskier saves a cow! With a little help from Geralt 😉 (Set during the events of Baptism of Fire, more exactly after the Fish Soup and before the Battle on the Bridge. You don't need to have read the books though to enjoy the story.)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences, No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: Gen
Relationship: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & The Hansa | Geralt's Company Members
Characters: Geralt of Rivia, Emiel Regis Rohellec Terzieff-Godefroy, Maria Barring | Milva, Cahir Mawr Dyffryn aep Ceallach, Jaskier | Dandelion
Words: 1759
Read on Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46668610
@witchermonstermayhem
#witchermonstermayhem2023#witchermonstermayhemday19#acid attack#archespore#Geralt's Hansa#the hansa#geralt of rivia#Jaskier#dandelion#milva barring#emiel regis#Cahir Mawr Dyffryn aep Ceallach#cahir#eamon farren#joey batey#meng'er zhang#regis#the witcher fanfiction#the witcher novels#the witcher netflix#baptism of fire
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In my defense, this is totally lore-accurate. Your honor.
caution nudity below
Everyone needs a hobby. Don't judge me.
#I personally prefer Kayran than archespore#the witcher#geralt of rivia#the witcher netflix#twn#the witcher games#the witcher 2#the witcher wild hunt#the witcher 3#the witcher fanart#I'm not sure I should add community lable or not#you can find me on the twitter if i get banned
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Prompt 128
In place of August Sixteenth, Promptapalooza 9/ Most people immediately assume Geralt would be annoyed by human ailments. Find them distracting, or burdensome. They assume that if Jaskier gets sick, the Witcher wakes him up at dawn and forces them to travel onward any ways. They spread rumors that Jaskier sews his own wounds when caught in a hunt. The people speak of the heartless witcher yelling at the bard for getting sick. Of course, it's all false. Couldn't be more false, actually. Jaskier woke up with a sniffle. Just a tiny sniffle. No big deal! And yet, Geralt noticed. Of course he noticed. Notices everything with those damn supersenses of his. "Geralt, the contract-" "Fuck the contract." "That archespore hasn't even taken me on a date yet." "Jaskier, lay down!" "I can sit up-" "LAY DOWN!" Jaskier has been stuck in a witcher-enforced bedrest for two days. Even if the sniffles became sneezes, and his throat began to get scratchy and sore. So what if he had a fever? So what if he felt like shit? He shouldn't be slowing Geralt down! But Geralt won't let him do anything but slow him down! "Not gonna tackle me to the bed?" "No, walking is good for you, in spurts." "How nice." "No, keep moving. Ten more minutes of walking." "In the room?" "You can lap the inn if you'd like." "Well, alri-" "No wait- It rained recently- Too cold and damp for you." "Says who?" "Says me. And your fever." "Geralt, it's been two days of nothing but laying!" "I thought you liked being in bed." "Yes! To fuck! To sleep! Not to lay and stare at you!" "I like staring at you." "FineI'llpacethefuckingroom-"
#motherhen Geralt#protective geralt#geraskier#geralt x jaskier#the witcher#geralt x dandelion#geralt loves his bard!#witcher fanfiction#fanfiction prompts#writing prompts#requited unrequited love#friends to lovers#established relationship#sickfic#caretaking#jaskier whump#but not really that whumpy#jaskier angst#but not really that angsty#mostly just fluff and humor#but Jaskier feels like shit for it all#lol
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post game Ciri passing a field with archespores, the locals say they can't pay her and the land's lord had refused to call a witcher
she goes to the lord to negotiate, of course he truly is one of those assholes who refuse to pay, the peasants will have to deal (they can't, some already died)
so she kills the archespores for free, gathers the seeds, breaks into the lord's garden at night and plants the next gen archespores
months later, the approximate time it takes for the spores to grow, she comes back, agrees to kill the monster for three times the price
that's how she gets rich by fucking with the dickheads 👍
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Dragonfish Reloaded
I continue the story of the WaterFireGod, for part 1 click here
(1) Remember the gate, where the humanoid aliens came through?:
(2) It changed a lot after them humanoids arived -
(3) The second invasion started at dawn. It all happened very fast:
Some very mighty guards came through the gate...
(4) ...and them tiny fragile blossoms, that arrived earlier with the humanoids, grew within seconds into all kinds of - plants?! :
(5) At the same time, a second gate opened…
(6) … spitting out some more "visitors"…
(7) … all kinds of pretty agressive fellas!
(8) The whole garden of our little unnamed sim changed into a nightmare.
Well, he called them, and they came, right?
(9) They forced him to sit down and stay put on an alienesh-crystal-stone-stool-thingy…
(10) …and startet talking…
(11) … to their GOD! The WaterFireGod. Our well known dragonfish.
(12) Then they told our little unnamed sim, that they will return to their home planet through that portal, together with their god...
(13) … right after they solved this kind-a-tricky problem, that they just learned about from the little fish - sry, your highness, of course -
(14) Turns out, unfortunatly they can not just kill the sim, and leave with their god, as they intended…
(15) … because their god can not survive without our little unnamed sim, due to the bond that exists between them. This bond must be broken of course. Or else!
(16) (Moment of akward silence)
(17) They startet negotiating. Meanwhile it was bright daylight.
(18) They discussed during the whole day…
(19) …and also the whole next night.
(20) It turned out, there is more to the good old dragonfish than we ever imagined:
When he spits fire unterwater, while living with a sim that he has a very special bond with, the fire sinks down on the ground, and turnes into gold.
And you know what they say about dragons… they protect treasure.
Next time I will tell you:
What kind of bond the sim + the dragonfish do have,
what the sim is doing with all this gold?!,
and what the "Fisch des Grauens*" has to do with all that
ITS YOUR TURN NOW!
I want you to have the option to influence the story. You can choose 1 of these 3 options, what you want me to put into the story next:
No 1 - Someone will die
OR
No 2 - No one will die
OR
No 3 - Something will happen that has to do with owls.
Just write it into the comments until the End of April, then we will wrap it up and count the voices for 1/2/3!
* Please someone tell me how this fish is called in English, I couldn´t figure that out! (the dark-greenish fella living in the ponds of graveyards, killing all other fishes, and that can be used for prolonging live) - Or maybe I´ll just make up a new name for it :-D , you can recognize it anyway by the pictures I will take then.
The mods I used here for the first time:
Asparagus densiflorus, from alex_stanton1983
Lotus Lamp, from 4Sims
Floor-Lamp Skoll, from sim_man123
From @murfeelee :
TW3 Archespore Miniset
Skyrim Blackreach Giant Mushrooms as Outdoor Lights Miniset
AMR Small Plants Group
Junk Pile as Coin Pile
Deniisu_TS4 to TS3 RoM Rug Medallion as Floor Light
Thank you, @murfeelee! Love your stuff since I played the first time with the telvanni-village, and that was on my old computer (meanwhile, this computer I´m using now is pretty old).
I will also continue the 10-things-challange, weeks ago I already picked the items for the next round - but at the moment, I want to finish that alien-story first!
And yes, I still have to finish the sorting of my mod-collection. That has highest priority, not just because I want to continue playing, but also because of this 10-things-challange I started. For both I need a well-sorted, richly filled mod-folder (lol).
Well. The last weekend I spend downloading nearly everything that Murfeelee ever published :-D ! Just the sorting of this murfeelee-collection alone will take a week, or two, or whatever it takes :-D.
I started yesterday evening with the Letter A. Today I will do the B… like in "babysteps". Like in "Baby Yoda as Teddybear", that is the first mod beginning with a "B" in my murfeel-folder.
Just imagine, this green little fella, how well he would have fit in my alien-story, if I would have known this mod a week before.
You all have a good time :-)
Oh NO now I need to do the tagging. I still have NO clue how that really works here on tumblr, although I always watch you other simmers out there, and try to get it.
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Autumn Equinox: Subquest prompts
This a list of prompts inspired by the subquests in the Autumn Equinox dash event! (Starts on the 9th!) Feel free to add context as wanted or needed. Muse A refers to the sender's muse, Muse B refers to the receiver's muse.
The SUCCESS and FAILURE prompts assume a roll from Muse A, while the ROLL prompts ask Muse B to make one! You can find the skill checks in the lovely doc for the event.
[PLANTS (SUCCESS)] Muse A attempts to persuade the flowers to behave
[PLANTS (FAILURE)] Muse A attempts to persuade the plants to behave
[PLANTS (ROLL)] Muse B attempts to persuade the plants to behave
[ARGUMENT] Our muses have an argument in Bloomridge Park
[ROMANCE] Our muses have a romantic, intimate moment in Bloomridge Park
[CHOMP] Muse A is bitten / attacked by a plant
[MUNCH] Muse B is bitten / attacked by a plant
[BLOOM] Flowers start to bloom around our muses
[ARCHESPORE] Our muses fight the Archespore
[DANCE (SUCCESS)] Muse A dances with Muse B
[DANCE (FAILURE)] Muse A dances with Muse B
[DANCE (ROLL)] Muse B is asked for a dance by Muse A
[DREAM] Muse B spots someone they love, who is alive
[CHIMERA] Muse B spots someone they love, who is dead
[NIGHTMARE] Muse B spots someone they hate, who is alive
[GHOST] Muse B spots someone they hate, who is dead
[ILLUSION] Muse B realizes the person they saw was an illusion
[UNICORN (SUCCESS)] Muse A attempts to approach the Black Unicorn
[UNICORN (FAILURE)] Muse A attempts to approach the Black Unicorn
[UNICORN (ROLL)] Muse B attempts to approach the Black Unicorn
[HUNTERS (SUCCESS)] Muse A attempts to persuade or deceive the Hunters
[HUNTERS (FAILURE)] Muse B attempts to persuade or deceive the Hunters
[HUNTERS (ROLL)] Our muses attempt to persuade or deceive the Hunters
[POINTY] Our muses fight the Black Unicorn
[HUNT] Our muses capture the Unicorn, or lead the Hunters to it.
[CHILDREN (SUCCESS)] Muse A attempts to locate the missing children
[CHILDREN (FAILURE)] Muse A attempts to locate the missing children
[CHILDREN (ROLL)] Muse B attempts to locate the missing children
[CHANGELINGS] Our muses fight the changelings
[OUT] Our muses are kicked out of somewhere, or get into a fight, while looking for the gems
[STEALTH] Our muses successfully sneak somewhere while looking for the gems
[RED] Our muses find the red gem (Are they taking anything else?)
[ORANGE] Our muses find the orange gem
[YELLOW] Our muses find the yellow gem
[GREEN] Our muses find the green gem (Robbing graves? Really? Again?)
[BLUE] Our muses find the blue gem
[INDIGO] Our muses find the indigo gem
[VIOLET] Our muses find the violet gem (Not the sewers…)
[PROFIT] Muse A suggests selling the completed crown
[WHY] Muse A tries on the completed crown (roll damage, probably)
[DARE] Muse B dares/encourages Muse B to try on the completed crown
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Witcher Monster MAYhem 2023 approaches!
Rules:
Anyone can participate.
Any media form is allowed (art, fic, gifs, music, whatever).
You can participate however much or as little as you want, no pressure to complete all the prompts.
You can post your work anywhere on the internet, Tumblr, Ao3, etc.
Tag potential triggers and NSFW accordingly.
If you want to be counted as an official participant and have the chance to be featured on the blog, post your content on tumblr during the month of May. You can still use the prompt list after May ends.
Don't worry if you cannot post your creation on the day of the prompt, as long as it's during May, it counts.
To make it easier for you to fill all 31 prompts, here are some special rules:
You can use just one prompt of the day or combine prompts of the same day (but this counts just as one fill) or you can combine prompts of different days. (If you combine, for example, 2. vampire, 4. cruel claws, 8. full moon, this counts as 3 prompt fills.)
For every new work that you have created for the event, you can post one old work of yours that fits a prompt. They count like new works! (Please tag old works with #old)
You may combine a prompt with a fill for another event!
I can’t guarantee that every single work will be featured but I’ll try to reblog as many as I can.
To increase your chances of being featured here, tag your post with the event name and the prompt of the day that you used.
example 1: #witchermonstermayhem2023, #witchermonstermayhemday1, #too many toes
example 2: #witchermonstermayhem2023, #alt. breathing fire #old
You can also @ the blog, @witchermonstermayhem
If you have any questions, please feel free to ask!
Please reblog and tag your friends who might be interested in the event. Thank you!
Have fun with the prompts! (see below)
@witcherwheeloftheyear
@witcherrarepaircommentexchange
@witchersummercamp
@witcher-bows-and-arrows
And here the prompts as text:
WitcherMonsterMAYhem 2023 Prompts:
1. Too many toes | myriapod | centipede
2. Fearsome fangs | striga | vampire
3. Wicked wings | dragon | wyvern
4. Cruel claws | gruesome gashes | scar
5. Nefarious necrophages | ghoul | cemetaur
6. Terrifying tentacles | zeugl | kraken
7. Vicious venom | basilisk | paralysed
8. Haunting howls | werewolf | full moon
9. Something wicked in the water | bubbles | drowner
10. Eery eyes | bloodshot | glowing in the dark
11. Hairy horror | yeti | berserker
12. Searing stings | sharp spikes | puncture wound
13. Shimmering scales | mermaid | mesmerised
14. Scary scratching | nasty noises | reverberating roar
15. Clever camouflage | ambush predator | eyehead
16. Creepy chittering | insectoid | metamorphosis
17. Terrible talons | griffin | chernabog
18. Horrible horns | unicorn | impaled
19. Acid attack | archespore | ants
20. Ghastly ghost | hell hound | nightwraith
21. Ancient abomination | leshen | crones
22. Sexy sirens | succubus | seduction
23. Smelly swamps | kikimore | will-o'-the-wisp
24. Treacherous trap | sand monster | grabbed
25. Menacing maw | swallowed | selkiemore
26. Towering trolls | nasty nekkers | grim giants
27. Duplicitous doppler | despicable doppelgänger | shapeshifting
28. Rare reptiloid | ferocious fish | absurd amphibian
29. Deadly demon | possessed | diabolic djinn
30. Beautiful bruxa | bloodsucking | black bat
31. Cave creature | barbegazi | knocker
Alternative Prompts (alt.)
If there’s a prompt above you don’t feel inspired or comfortable doing, you can switch it out with any one of these alternatives!
Growl
Run
Breathing fire
Scent of sulfur
Blood-curdling cry
Forked tongue
Hide
Undead
Burrow
Turned to stone
Silver sword
Don't kill it!
I hate monsters
Toss a coin
Monster friend
#witchermonstermayhem#witchermonstermayhem2023#monsters#monster prompts#witcher prompts#witcher event#the witcher#the witcher netflix#the witcher books#the witcher games#the witcher all media types
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title; this isn't homosexuality pairing; fleeced wolf (lambert/anthelme) word count; 1047 content warnings; drinking, drunk characters, implied fistfight
summary; it's a russian taunt
---
Tonight was a night to drink. Anthelme had even decided to actively get drunk, rather than sit around buzzed while the other wolves were piss drunk, bringing down one of his own bottles. Geralt was very happy to have a glass, while the others stuck purely to their homebrew. The conversation shifted topics like ripples in water. At first, Eskel was talking about a fascinating hunt he’d had (and the autopsy he’d done on it), then the topic went to the worst monster to fight (Eskel was being boringly indecisive, while Lambert and Geralt argued about archespores and wraiths), then which women were the best (which was mostly taking the piss out of Geralt for his thing for elves).
“Might as well just, just plough a block of marble! It’d be as warm!” Lambert snickered. “Fuck off. You’re just…jealous.” “Jealous? As fucking if!”
Anthelme tuned out of the conversation, let the words wash over him as he focused on his wine glass, swirling the contents around a bit. He glanced up, blinked when he saw Lambert staring at him.
“What?” He then noticed everyone staring at him. “C’mon, what’s your type?” Eskel goaded. He raised a brow, then his glass, taking a sip. “I thought I made it obvious enough with my personal aesthetic and mannerisms.” “Huh?” “I’m not into women. Rather proudly so, matter of fact.” “...Okay, then what’s your type of man?” Geralt shrugged.
Anthelme chokes a bit on his next sip of wine, not anticipating the question. What was his type? He made a bit of a face and shrugged, prompting a chorus of annoyed groans. “You’re dodging the damn question!” Lambert bitched. “I don’t know! Ugh, let me think…” He stares into his glass. “I like men with dark hair.” “Really? That’s it? Dark hair? That’s the bar?” “Shut the fuck up. I don’t go whorehunting like you do.” “I’ll show you whorehunting-”
With that declaration of war, Lambert clambered over the table, and Anthelme tried to abscond before he could pin him down. Geralt got up and swapped table sides, while Eskel just sat back, genuinely curious as to where this was going.
“Should…we stop them?” Geralt haltingly asked, trying not to throw up after moving so much. “Not like they’ll kill each other…” Eskel stared into his mug, just now realising he’d been taking sips of air for the past minute.
Geralt went to grab Anthelme’s bottle, then realised it wasn’t there. Lambert must have knocked it down in his attack. He made a shockingly soft sound of dismay. “The wine…”
Geralt and Eskel both paused in what they were doing as they realised the sounds of combat had…changed. They looked at each other, then leaned over the table to look at the other side at the same time.
Lambert was on top of Anthelme still, having kept him pinned with his weight the whole fight. Anthelme had his hand buried in Lambert’s hair, clenched but not tugging him off. There was a spattering of blood on Lambert’s knuckles, but not enough to indicate anything serious had happened. Lambert was still shifting to keep Anthelme under him, rather roughly, but Anthelme’s legs were wrapped around his middle. It finally dawned on them what was going on as Lambert’s attentions moved from Anthelme’s mouth to his neck.
“...They’re making out,” Geralt managed to spit out first. “Holy shit,” Eskel concurred.
They both sat back down, in varying states of clouded surprise. Eskel’s brow furrowed as he considered it more. He’d said he liked dark haired men. But, he thought…
“...Not that…surprising, actually,” Eskel concluded. Geralt looked over at him, an unspoken question in his brow. “It’s been weeks since Lambert got any. Anthelme’s kinda…” He gestures vaguely with his hands, in a way that is decisively unhelpful or indicative of what he means. Geralt scoffs quietly in disbelief, and Eskel groans softly, tossing up the unhelpful hand in a ‘whatever’ gesture. “You know what I mean.” “Waifish?” “Yeah.” “...I guess. The facial hair kinda…kinda detracts, though.” “Ignoring the face. Long hair, tends to pad out his hips…” “Wait, what?” “He asked me to help him with his armour a while ago, when he was hung over. Wears extra leathers on his hips. Asked me not to tell.” “So you told me.” “...Not like he’s gonna know.”
Geralt leaned over the table again, furrowed his brow.
“If you two are gonna undress, take it…somewhere else.” They finally seemed to come back to reality, with Lambert struggling off and attempting to get to his feet first. Anthelme sat up, moustache thoroughly mussed, still a bit dazed. “Ah…quoi?” “Fucking hell.” Geralt sat back again. “Get a room.”
Lambert and Anthelme split, and Eskel and Geralt only stayed for a couple more minutes before deciding to turn in themselves. The next morning was a blur of hungover fumbling, which culminated in the boys sitting at the table nursing coffees as Vesemir begrudgingly made and assembled breakfast.
“...So, about last night,” Geralt started, making Anthelme bury his nose deeper into his mug as Lambert sat up, suddenly on the defensive. “What about last night.” “The, uh…fighting.” “There was a fight?” Vesemir came around with some plates, placing them down indistinctly. Geralt nodded, dragging one over to himself before anyone else could get theirs. “Yeah, Lambert launched himself over the table,” Eskel chimed in. Anthelme grabbed his plate, declining to contribute to the conversation as Lambert scoffed. “I just climbed over it, I didn’t launch anywhere!” “What was it about?” Vesemir sat down with his own plate. “Anthelme implied we go whorehunting,” Geralt supplied through a mouthful of chicken. Vesemir raised a brow in Anthelme’s direction, and when he did nothing to defend himself, he shook his head with a sigh. “That’s not the problem, though.” Eskel leaned forward a bit. “What was with the making out?” “It wasn’t-!” “No, you guys were making out.” “Not on purpose!” Geralt snorted. “Not on purpose?” “I- I’m not, gay or anything, it just- we were both drunk, the mood struck-” “The mood struck?” “Yeah!” “You don’t have any better arguments?” “Fuck off.”
Anthelme snickered quietly into his coffee, and Lambert quickly glanced over, his pupils dilating just a bit. Everybody decided commenting would be more trouble than it was worth.
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Fandom: The Witcher
Rating: Explicit
Warning: Expect everything to be way out in left field, then take that expectation and throw it in a river. Remember, this is the witcher universe. It’s a cruel and violent world. Gore/sexual situations(con or not) will be described, strong/offensive language will be used. People will emotionally break and have their ability to “live on” tested (some might fail). What happens really just depends.
Chapters: 1/?
“Meeting a vampire in a cemetery. How much more cliche can one get?” The tall, white haired wolf said as he cautiously creeped forward through the rubble and gnarled roots that littered the cramped cave. As he moved, his hands, clad in earthen brown armed gloves, were slick with sweat from how tightly he gripped the wooden pommel of his trusted rune-encrusted silver sword. Every muscle in his body was tense, his stance screaming ‘dangerous’, ‘do not approach’.
Muttering under his breath, he recounted the admittedly amusing invitation he had received from his old, once dead friend. Honesty, the idea of meeting him at a cemetery, of all things, sounded like a tale spun by the overly courageous bard Dandelion— or Jaskier to his friends.
On a dark and stormy night, a lone Witcher, and a brave vampire meet in a cemetery. The rain pounded against the tombstones as he— haha, hilarious… Until it wasn’t. And it wasn’t for Geralt, not by a long shot. Oh sure, the place had been easy to find. A large, abandoned graveyard normally was; all he had to do was mention the name of the place once, to be pointed in the right direction.
The problem, however, was actually getting inside the tomb that lay in the center of the graveyard. Not only was its stone door locked tight, but the Witcher’s horse, Roach, had freaked out the moment her mutated rider was out of sight. So big was her fit that her nickers and neighs not only attracted the attention of two large and overgrown archespore, but the sound of her cries also drew in an unlucky giant centipede that just happened to be nearby… At least the fights were easy enough; a clever mixture of ingi and ard made sure of that.Read the full chapter on AO3(be sure to read the tags and chapter notes. Your only warning lol)
https://archiveofourown.org/works/45835249/chapters/115353352
#the witcher 3#tw3 wild hunt#Emiel Regis Rohellec Terzieff-Godefroy#geralt of rivia#oc insert#witcher crossover#fan art#blood and wine#the witcher 3 wild hunt fan fiction#alternate universe fanfic#3d render#ai audio#cloaned voice#Read on AO3
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"Between listening to the tales about the hypnotic world of crimson grasses and glass skies, half of which might be rhyming fantasy and another - self-indulgent lies, and killing half of the carnivorous flora and fauna of Toussaint without any reward for your good deeds, you deserved a little fun." Orianna drunk the chuckle as if the said grasses were crawling up her throat. During last weeks their time together outside of dutiful chores was scarce. While the young witcher strolled down the countryside, like a brave little knight, Orianna fought her own battles in smoothing out the consciences of that woeful trip to the market with the captain of the Ducal Guard. Damien de la Tour had been suspicious of the secretive mistress of the Mandragora before, not as much due to the unconscious feeling of preservation, as to his stern opinion that Her Grace's visiting her soirées was an archespore soon to bloom. Thankfully, the alien delight of popcorn rendered their talk rather one-sided and gave Orianna all the time she needed to lull captain's fervent desire to capture the truth of the matter. Cirilla's incognito, her very head, and Orianna's own reputation were thusly salvaged. However, the sun-eyed began missing their selfish shared adventures, light and dizzying as a young blood wine. The Duchy were full of the eyes and silent wings that informed the sun-eyed well of the little witcher's progress. It would be rude to leave her beloved guest solely on her own devices, and a few contracts - the most inconvenient and perilous ones - conveniently disappeared from the boards before the grey-haired maiden made her way into the village-in-need. Especially, if a contract mentioned a werewolf. "Forget about your calling for a while, my sweet Ciri. Least soon our knights would hold it against you that you are stealing all their opportunities to help the land and prove themselves," a nod to hand upon the sword, a gesture of habit more than any reaction to real danger there was. The only thing that could case the cultured vampire any unease tonight was the fault in her planned revelry. She craved wonder in Cirilla's eyes, as her children craved sweets. Hunting together with the maiden or keeping her on a short leash were out of question - and the sun-eyed noted with the trained eye of a courtier that the feather-down, the rich food, the sweet music and the gilded halls made the princess, the witcher bored and morose. "If you feel disappointed that no monster awaited you, that shall soon be remedied." with the footsteps softer than the snowdrift, she joined Ciri as the land beneath glittered with soft lights of grand palaces and merchant houses, and blinked with the pools of rich darkness where there was a forest or a shore. Toussaint was a pretty picture, made even more toy-like with the silver blanket of snow. It pleased Orianna that the maiden beside her appreciated such beauty. For soon she would see it, as no human eye had ever had... "I don't believe I have shown my wings to any of your kindred," the confession left her lips softly, cold and weightless like a snowflake, masking the omittance that they both heard. Any of your kindred that left to tell the tale...
Suddenly Orianna felt awkward and a little angry for her own awkwardness. Surely, for a person who had spent the last week waddling through drowners' guts and bandits' camps a pair of wings - the wings that she herself thought rather exquisitely shaped before a minute ago - was not a loathome sight? "Are you ready for the flight? I believe I shall lift us as high as that enormous wheel you enjoyed so in another world." coaxed the sun-eyed, somewhat more hurriedly than a playful tone required.
@fallesto
There truly was no place like home, and returning felt like a warm embrace, even if this land wasn’t hers by birth. It wrapped around her like a comforting blanket, each corner brimming with enchantment and novelty, as if she had stepped into a fairy tale.
During her stay, she honored her promise and ventured into the city, scanning the boards outside the taverns and barracks for contracts. Most were straightforward: a bandit camp to dismantle, a small monster nest to clear, or perhaps a spirit haunting a former lover. There were also peculiarities in the countryside, where insects had grown to the size of horses, and the forests were rife with issues that needed addressing. These tasks were a breeze for someone with her skills and talents, and while the coin was nice, it wasn’t her primary motivation. She found joy in aiding the people, often refusing payment, especially in the rural villages. Instead, she encouraged them to save their resources for their children and families.
She was determined to make the most of the next four months. If a werewolf crossed her path, she knew she had to be more than prepared. The challenges were daunting; one misstep could lead to infection or worse, being torn apart and devoured.
As the moment arrived, she ascended the mountain, her fur cloak wrapped tightly around her and her sword secured on her back. The trail was familiar; she had spent her life tracking monsters, animals, and even humans. In an instant, she opened her eyes, easily locating the vampire who awaited her—hardly a challenge at all.
"You nearly made this too simple for me. I doubt anyone else could have found such a clever hiding spot and concealed their tracks so well. I’m genuinely impressed," she remarked, a playful chuckle escaping her lips, accompanied by a bright smile.
"Typically, I would caution against being in a place like this during a full moon, but for us, I believe we’ll be just fine." She tightened her grip on the sword's handle, ready for any trouble that might arise. After all, who would dare to attack a vampire?
"I half-expected to encounter a giant or a werewolf up here. I was almost anxious about getting beaten and having to hobble back down," she admitted, letting her hand fall from her brow. She gazed out at the breathtaking view from the mountain's peak, where the howling winds met the fallen snow. As she stepped forward, the distant lights of small torches, towers, and castles came into view, along with the sprawling countryside and winding roads. She closed her eyes, inhaling the crisp air and letting out a soft sigh.
It felt like standing at the pinnacle of the world, and in truth, this place was a thousand times more magnificent than anywhere they had been before.
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Witcher Monster MAYhem masterpost
New works (41.033 new words) written for the event prompts (in chronological order of events):
Shimmering Scales and Stormy Seas (Words 800): This is the story of Jaskier's first time. Decide yourself if it is true or just a tall tale. Smut! (13. shimmering scales, mermaid, mesmerised, 22. Seduction)
Of Smelly Sewers and Man-eating Monsters (Words 2,808): On the run from the Brotherhood of Sorcerers, Yennefer and Cahir travers the ancient elven aqueduct on their way from Gors Velen to Oxenfurt to find the Sandpiper. But not only the monster with the many tentacles is lurking in the sewers. (6. Terrifying tentacles, Zeugl, 21. Ancient abomination, 28. Absurd amphibian)
A Most Unusual Plant (Words 1,765): Jaskier saves a cow! With Geralt's help, of course - A little monstery adventure Geralt and his company have on their way to find the druids. (Set during the events of Baptism of Fire, more exactly after the Fish Soup and before the Battle on the Bridge. You don't need to have read the books though to enjoy the story.) (19. Acid attack, Archespore)
Of Eery Eyes and Vicious Venom (Words 500): While travelling with the Witcher and his friends in search of Princess Cirilla, Cahir faces a frightening monster. (7. Vicious venom, paralysed, 10. eery eyes, 15. eyehead)
A most interesting read (Words 2,534): While Geralt and his strange company are on their way to the druids of Caed Dhu, Milva asks Cahir to read a very special book for her. (26. Grim Giant)
How to Kill a Troll (Words 7,612): Geralt and Cahir go on a monster hunt together. Set the summer after Stygga (1268). (14. Reverberating roar, 26. Towering trolls, alt. Silver Sword, Toss a coin)
Wicked Wings and Fearsome Fangs (Words 2,548): On their way to fulfil a contract, Geralt and Cahir happen upon yet another monster. And upon you. First person POV or second person POV. (2. Fearsome Fangs, 3. Wicked wings, 4. Cruel claws, Wyvern, alt. Forked tongue)
You'd be wise to beware (Words 12,847): Geralt and Cahir go on a monster hunt together where they meet an old friend, Jaskier. Unfortunately, the hunt is not as easy as expected ... (1. Too many toes, Myriapod, Centipede, 3. Wicked wings)
The dark things that wait in that house (Words 7,714): After his almost fatal injury at Stygga Castle, Cahir has lost his memory. He lives at Kaer Morhen and has become a Witcher. On the way back to the Witcher keep after his first monster hunt alone, Cahir helps a woman in distress. But is she really who she appears to be? (16. Metamorphosis, 23. Smelly swamps, 24. Treacherous trap, 27. Duplicitous Doppler, Shapeshifting, alt. I hate Monsters)
Monster Friend 1 (Words 300): Regis is waiting in front of the Witcher Keep, but Vesemir is reluctant to let the monster inside the walls of Kaer Morhen. Can Geralt convince him? Triple-Drabble. (alt. Monster friend)
Not Yet - Monster Friend 2 (Words 1,405): Regis meets Cahir on the doorsteps to Kaer Morhen just before the rain starts pouring down. (alt. Monster friend)
Blue (Words 200): Geralt spots something in a meadow. Something that is impossible to exist. (3. Dragon, alt. Monster friend)
Dreaming of Unicorns: Fanart (18. Unicorn)
... ... ... ... ... ... ...
Older works fitting the prompts:
5. Ghoul, alt. Growl, Run, Blood-curdling cry : Of Monsters and Moonshine
9. Something wicked in the water, Bubbles, 12. Puncture wound: And quietly lay the frozen lake
14. Scary scratching, alt. Hide: That Scratching
26. Grim Giants: The White Death
31. Cave creature / Barbegazi: Of cavern conversations and mountain monsters
#witchermonstermayhem2023#witchermonstermayhem2023masterpost#masterpost#the witcher prompt event#the witcher fanfiction#the witcher netflix#the witcher novels#the witcher books#the witcher fanfictions#witcher fics#Cahir Mawr Dyffryn aep Ceallach#geralt of rivia#the hansa#jaskier#yennefer of vengerberg#milva barring#emiel regis#vesemir#regis#angoulême
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Not to be a plant nerd on main but the archespore is the best Witcher monster. Ive never played the games but I've read through the bestiary wiki and nothing else compares.
Such a large carnivorous plant wouldn't be able to grow in anything besides "cursed" soil.
Carnivorous plants need to grow in nutrient-lacking soil bc if their roots are taking in nutrients, and their mouths are also taking in nutrients from prey, their systems get overloaded and they poison themselves. If you want to grow carnivorous plants, you can't use fertilizer, you need inert soil mixes.
I love the concept of a crime so awful that it renders the ground around it inert so that nothing but something just as bad as your crime can flourish
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Today’s Journal Entry:
Killed an Archespore near Toussaint, got covered in its fluids.
Haven’t got paid, slept in the woods (again).
Met old friends on the road, drank an ale together. Or more than one. I don’t remember, may you be cursed Lambert.
Back on the Path with Shard.
#journal entry#witcher life#archespore#fuck you lambert#i hate being covered in guts#lambert#eskel#geralt#maybe#maybe we will meet sooner or later
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Here’s a messy Archespore sketch 🤡 👍🏻
Now then, let’s give a few digital enhancements~
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"Folklore claims they sprout from soil watered with the blood of the dying. Thus they flourish in grounds consecrated by pogroms, dark rituals or brutal murders."
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@fallesto "Oh, a proper seasmtress is more precious that a treasure chest! I can easily imagine myself being stolen for my craft." her proclamation was serious, but his joke and his chuckle soon shaped her own mouth into a bright, little smile. No fangs. She was a polite succubus, and they were not even on a date! The instinct told the hoofed thief it was her cue to ran, while her savior was rummaging in the cart, but...another instinct, something her twin sister bemoaned often was stronger. Curiosity. After all, it was her very first witcher, flesh and bones and two silver swords. "Thank you! Ah, thank you very rather much!" Natanis pressed the embroidered satchel to her chest, as if it was her missing heart. "Please, let's leave this terrible place." the air behind their backs still had a taste of metal and something choking, heavy and suffocating. That how brutality and violence tasted. She tried not to breath and hastened her hoofs to follow the witcher, admiring his strange clothes all the while. Why would he have so many spikes? What where those pads for? And those buttons and belts? Of course, he could lie being the geralt of rivia. But then why didn't he like the mentioning of the ballads? Would a liar do that? Would a liar have care to copy double swords, pale hair, abnormal eyes and most of all a worn out, prudent armour? Besides, the murky situation with the duchess made her wary. No matter how unpleasant the witcher's smirk looked, when he chuckled, and how nice and kind the cat-like eyes above it seemed, Natanis' was not going to loose her horns quickly. "Oh, you do not truly mean that, sangbonbon!" she gasped, and slipped in front of him, gazing deep into his face. The shock cured her of the timidity of fear. "Why, it can not be true, that you would not save a poor innocent maiden - beautiful horns or not - from the hands of rough bandits who put their victims in narrow, hideous cages? Are you lying to scare me with your chilling lies?" a dainty finger was pressed into his chest. He did not seem greedy. His blood sang differently. And his eyes were eerie, but kind. And he did not stop to collect anything from the corpses, like a person, lusting for gold would do. Nor did he ask her for anything - her pearls or her kisses, did he not?
"You insist that if not for the contract..." the horned trickster put her plump, dainty hand around his courageously, taking in the scent of leather, some unusual herbal concoctions and slightly of a horse. "...you would leave me to all terrible manners of death and ruinations, calm and cold? Even if an enormous, bloodlusty griffin swooned from the skies and put his claws into my poor, soft arms? Even if a ferocious, noxiously smelling ghoul wanted to gobble such a dainty, gentle succubus right before your glowing feline eyes? Even if an archespore, that gigantic and hideous flower, got jealous of the flowers of my cheeks you would do naught?" her voice rang with warmth and an echo of a smile, no matter how hard she tried to make the tone serious, fitting to the heartwrenching horrors she offered the witcher.
“A little bit more complex than that, might be wise to take your nose out of a book and form an opinion for yourself.” And not to judge him too much on what a certain poet has been told and wrote about, liking to mixing things up and change enough to make himself all the more wonderful.
As he didn’t well …
Shit.
Those damn books and songs that are spreading across the country about him, taking his adventures and blowing them up all the more, if they had been there, they would see it was not all fighting, saving, that sort of thing, there was a whole lot of things missed out, but he could not fault his friend for what he had done and for the fact that the witcher, felt like a side character in his own adventures as the poet had done.
A mighty fine job indeed.
Of putting himself within the hero’s shoes.
“You don’t need to tell me anything, not a knight of the duchess, not going to go to court, spread rumours, won a tournament, stopped some monsters, guess I impressed the right people.” To have a place for himself, a witcher with a home now, a vineyard as well, what did he know about such things.
Other than drinking it and getting into a warm bath.
“Don’t think you where captured and taken away, over royal outfits, but then again, I have seen stranger.” Reasons for things to happen, maybe this was all over dresses, maybe they where trying to get to the duchess.
Maybe he ought not to dig too much, and have this turn into another fine mess.
“Not been here long enough, to begin to know the best places for dresses or nightly delights, but thank you all the same.” As he waved his hand playfully back and forth before her for the moment, he was here for her, to protect her, to guide her, to bring her back to the duchess without any harm being done, a duchess was someone he did not wish to cross and find on the wrong side, she seemed, kind and gentle, but cross her, well he quite liked his head where it was right now.
Not in a rush, any kind of rush to see it removed and mounted on a spike.
“Funny way that, saying thank you for me getting you out of that cage, without the duchess and the contract, you would have been left there, not sure if they where planning to cook you and eat you, or hack you to pieces, but lucky enough, for to you just in time.” To ensure nothing bad happened to her and she lives to see another day, horns, tail, hooves and all!
“Think you are the right one, not sure if there are more cages out there filled with horn creatures matching you, duchess was quite clear, scent brought me here, not going to doubt that it is you I am looking for.” As he shifted his golden gaze and looked right at her, she didn’t need to be worried nor scared around her, he was not going to harm her in anyway at all.
“See, not a monster.” As he chuckled. “More like a maiden, that is high maintenance.” As he made his light jests at her and smirked, moving forward as he would look over to the cart and nod. “Stay here.” His hand raised, tapping her on the shoulder, as he turned and walked to the card and would look around and take and lift, the satchel for her, you see.
Nothing to it, simple enough, easy contract.
As he turned around and walked right back to her and would lean down and hand it out to her. “Right, lose a shoe, drop a brush, need anything else.” As he joked. “We need to get moving.” The sooner the better, he didn’t know why, he didn’t want to know why, someone was after her, and he needed to get her back to the duchess, in one piece.
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