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adultswim2021 · 2 years ago

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Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters | April 13, 2007 | Feature Film Premiered on April 10, 2007 in New York City

Before I start, I just want to point out that I was aghast that this wasn’t available on HBOMax for streaming, so I watched my DVD copy. Later I found out that the entire movie is on adultswim.com, but it’s 4:3 and letterboxed and I’m guessing it’s edited-for-television and might require a cable log in. It expires later this month. So if you’re in a similar boat but don’t have the DVD, watch it soon.

My general rule for what I cover here is any Adult Swim original comedy production that aired on Adult Swim proper. Things that don’t qualify under the “aired on Adult Swim proper” provision sometimes get relegated to special event weeks Like Space Ghost week, or the standalone week I just covered the first five episodes of Home Movies. Other stuff I stick under Ephemera Corner, a sub-feature where I cover stuff like special promos or bumps or DVDs or other extras that pertain to Adult Swim shows but didn’t air on Adult Swim. Sometimes I use it to cover different versions of an episode where relatively minor differences occur.

Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film for Theaters is a motion picture that debuted in theaters. Which means if I wanted to be a dickhead, I could call this ephemera and not spotlight it as much, or wait until it’s actual television debut to write it up. That doesn’t seem right to me. Also consider this: do I really want to dedicate the same amount of detail as I do for an episode review? They’ve been getting lengthy lately, haven’t they folks? Okay, let’s say I roughly type three paragraphs for an episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force. Does that mean this, which is roughly eight episodes of the show’s worth of content, deserves at least 24 paragraphs? AM I IN FUCKING SCHOOL OR SOMETHING?

A compromise: I acknowledge that this is such an event that it absolutely deserves a significant spotlight. Did I not write-up the Sealab and Aqua Teen and Brak Show and Harvey Birdman pilots because they debuted stealthily on Cartoon Network, before Adult Swim began? Some things deserve special treatment. And this movie, no matter whatever else you can think to say about it, at the very least deserves special treatment. It’s a movie-film for theaters for fuck’s sake.

Also: I’m already misusing the word “ephemera”, or at least polluting it by dragging it down to the perspective of treating cheaply-produced-television-as-important. Commercials, Bumpers, Promos, Website banner ads, promotional-tie-ins, trailers, etc. those are very much ephemeral. Up until somewhat recently, television was considered ephemeral. To make a movie is to make a statement that you’re making something that isn’t meant to be ephemera. It’s something you’re supposed to pay closer attention to than television. So, I won’t insult it by calling it ephemera. But don’t expect as extensive of a write-up.

The other reason: I don’t know if I could summarize the plot of this movie in a truly rewarding or fun way. A lot of shit happens in this movie. In fact, it feels less like a movie and more like a writing exercise to just make a movie using the same pace as an episode of Aqua Teen Hunger Force. The movie slows things down to a certain extent, but sometimes it feels like the ending is juuuust around the corner, because this is Aqua Teen and Aqua Teen is 12 minutes, tops. Sometimes it’s 23 minutes if it’s being weird.

The plot is basically the Aqua Teens build a piece of exercise equipment of mysterious origin. It turns out to be a robotic alien that takes over the globe while also making Carl get ripped, who is strapped to the thing and getting an automated workout of a lifetime. This all ties into Frylock’s recurring nightmares that hint at an Aqua Teen origin story. Turns out the machine was built by Dr. Weird, and part of the reason was so that he could get Carl all buff so he can cleave the muscles off his body and wear them like a suit, making him stronger, and able to fight Frylock when he gets lead down this path. More stuff gets revealed, such as why they exist. All the backstory and explanation is as dumb and as absurd as any other joke on the show, and then at a point they just start making fun of the whole idea of giving an actual shit about this.

There’s new characters like Walter Mellon, voiced by a famous guy, probably (looks it up). Oh, nevermind. He kinda helps make the movie like a typical “monster of the week” episode of the show, sorta. Really, the movie has a lot of tangents in order to give moments to some of the show’s more popular villains, like Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past, the Plutonians, the Mooninites, Dr. Weird and Steve of course. There’s also a scene with M.C. Pee Pants which could easily be cut, but it’s honestly one of the better and more memorable appearances by him. Supposedly nearly every villain is featured even it’s a brief cameo or in the background somewhere (the one I remember getting most excited about was Willie Nelson, who quickly crawls out of the attic when the Aqua Teen’s roof gets torn off).

Oh, since we’re talking about cameos (and apologies to Cameo, who was cut from the film): one of the best fucking things in the movie ever is a quick cutaway to Space Ghost getting hit by a wayward missile. He’s watching 12 Oz. Mouse on his monitor, even. Fucking wonderful seeing this on the big screen. Oh yeah, I’ll talk about seeing the movie at some point.

We get a lot of nods to the closing credits montage we’ve been seeing on television as though they were a tease for this film this entire time. The scene with Lincoln towards the beginning of the film is hysterically funny, and starts the film off on a strong note. There’s a LOT of hilarious stuff in this movie. It opens with a parody of “Let’s Go Out To The Lobby” but it’s freaking metal, putting the film in some particular canon of other films that also did that (Run Ronnie Run… the unproduced “Saturday Night Live: The Movie”... probably others).

I feel the movie is a little exhausting, and it barely feels like a movie. I love a lot about it, though, and roughly consider it good. No, really! Despite it’s problems, I genuinely love it. While it could have been better, the movie really did right by it’s fans by making something that is roughly as accessible as a regular series episode and not dumbing itself down entirely. And they even get to cuss! It really is a fun fucking ride, and is much better than it ought to be. But movies that are nothing but absurdity can be a little much to take. Sorta like eating candy for every meal.

A good example is there’s a part where the characters are having a conversation about the very real scary world-wide threat of this machine destroying downtown and reproducing asexually, and it cuts to Shake who notices the “camera” and moves his hot dog he’s eating down to his grown like it’s his penis and smiles, pleased with himself. I love this kind of thing. One of Aqua Teen’s enduring charms is that the people making it act like they don’t care about it, really. But for an entire 90 minute movie? You need a breather half-way through. A half-hour intermission would be nice. Like the theaters should have had a 30 minute intermission just to show you a local news broadcast.

When the movie debuted in theaters, I remember a slow roll-out. That is to say, I remember it not coming to my small town. I worked at a movie theater and there was a small handful of us who were fans of the show, including a couple managers. I remember bugging them to bug the regional manager to finally book the film for our theater in Redding, insisting that there were enough young people who loved the show that would come out and see it. One day we got the call: our theater was finally going to get it. We were so excited that we went out and voluntarily put the ENTIRE TITLE on the marquee, which was a tedious process and took forever, advertising the date it opened. We vowed to generate buzz and get every cool kid in Redding to show up for it. We wanted it to be a success, goddamn it.

Then we got the second call: Nevermind. We weren’t getting it. Chico was getting it. So, we had to glumly take the entire title down. But we were already whipped up for the movie, so we came up with a consolation prize: ROAD TRIP. About 9 of us piled into two cars and all went to attend the Chico, CA premiere of Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Movie Film For Theaters. The movie, I assume, was open matte, because the projectionist didn’t frame it correctly, causing some subtitles to get cropped off (for example, the opening Egypt scene where more and more subtitles litter the screen, the bottom one reading “1492”, was not fully legible; I knew it was a mistake and not a joke because this scene aired on TV letterboxed and is present on the DVD).

On the drive home, I bombed trying to impress a girl by launching into some semi-rehearsed story, I forget what the story was, but whatever it was I considered it a “greatest hit”. One of the other guys in the car had fallen asleep and my voice jostled him awake at one point he groggily yelled SHUT UP! At me. When he got the laugh I was sweatily trying to earn by holding court, I just sheepishly bailed on the story, and apologized for disrupting his nap. He wasn’t even trying to be funny. He literally started snoring right after that. I don’t even know if he knew where he was.

I would not get to see this film again until it came out on DVD a few months later. Imagine it. The indignity! Hell, I remember when movies used to take almost a year to come out on video.

Anyway, I’ve seen this movie only a handful of times, less than a lot of episodes of the show. I guess that says it all. It’s still really good, I just think the ideal form for the show is bite-sized chunks. It felt like an important triumphant event, and I had a great time watching it, and it’s better than most things of this nature. But I’m glad that I let a few years go by between viewings, and I would even say it was better than I remembered.

UHD version please. You can’t even buy this on blu-ray. Pathetic!

EPHEMERA CORNER

The movie had a fair amount of ephemera to go along with it, and I’m covering stuff I think is extra notable. There was also a few trailers, regular TV spots (I think?? I mean, there must’ve been more traditional type promos for the movie that aired outside of Adult Swim, but I don’t remember them if I saw them), a soundtrack album (featuring Meatwad singing with Superchunk and other fun stuff). Those are the things that normally go with the release of a major motion picture, so I won’t focus on them too much (NOTE: I have a bad track record with covering Adult Swim music releases; I knew Meatwas singing with Superchunk as a DVD menu backing track). But here’s some stuff worth mentioning:

youtube

Boston Bomb Scare (January 31, 2007)

To promote the film, Adult Swim had people in various large cities go around and place a Lite-Bite-esque light-up display of the Mooninites. On January 31, 2007, the city of Boston went crazy thinking that these things were bombs, causing the people who placed the guerilla advertisements to get arrested. They gave a press conference (above) where they deflected the question by talking about haircuts of the 1970s. What a couple of goofy guys! A real Matt and Dave in the making! I tell ya!

Fun Fact: I live mere blocks away from a liquor store that has the Portland Mooninite in it.

Matt & Dave’s Favorite Episodes Week (April 9-12, 2007)

Monday-Thursday the week before the movie opened, Adult Swim promoted the movie by airing a half hour of Aqua Teen Hunger Force with little host segments from Matt and Dave. These segments are also found on the Volume Five DVD set.

Dana Bugs People at the Movie Theater Promos

Couldn’t tell you when these actually premiered, but I’m guessing they aired all April. Dana Snyder accosts people at the movie theater and is rude about people seeing the Aqua Teen Hunger Force Movie! These are on the Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie DVD.

Danny Mothers promos

Danny Mothers, host of I Love Movies on Channel 5. He’s from the Awesome Show universe, and I forgot all about this until my friends started talking about it! This is a really funny bit. When I rewatched it for this, it started ringing bells. These might have aired as promos in small chunks, but I don’t actually remember this. This is available on the Movie DVD, or you can watch it in crappy quality on Adult Swim’s official YouTube channel.

Fake Endings

On the movie DVD there’s a collection of fake movie endings. I’ve pieced together what I think seems right as far as the origin and intended use for these: some were posted on Youtube, an Aqua Teen fan site, and as part of The Worst Game Ever (aka Go Right!), where the prize for completing the game was a clip of the movie’s ending. Most of them debuted on adultswim.com after the initial rollout. First time I saw them was on TV; when the DVD was coming out, Adult Swim did an ATHF marathon that included a lot of these and other stuff from the DVD between the episodes.

The Worst Game Ever/Go Right!

Okay, I don’t quite remember if this game was made to promote the movie or not, but I THINK IT BASICALLY WAS, and it should get mentioned somewhere, so why not here? It’d be too much of a pain in the ass to try and date it, anyway. I think what happened is this: the game debuted on adultswim.com, possibly not to promote the movie. Then the official movie website, kingcolon.com, also had the game on there, but maybe it was modified to include the “fake ending” prize?

ATHF Responds to the Critics

Found on the Volume 5 DVD. These aired after opening weekend, and it features the characters yelling at everyone for not seeing the movie enough, urging those who were loyal to the film opening weekend to go see it again, or even just pay for a ticket and not use it. I am assuming that they were made before the movie premiered. I’m guessing Matt and Dave anticipated that the movie would be struggling to find a large audience.

ATHF Movie Premiere with Space Ghost

This is a special one! This is another one you can find on the Volume 5 DVD, but in a truncated form. It’s the same one found on youtube. Originally this was streamed live on adultswim.com, and for a while they had an archive of the event up. George Lowe dressed like Space Ghost is hilarious and charming for the entire thing, bugging people on the red carpet and vamping when nobody worth talking to is around. He’s self effacing and jocular and always on. Just one of the funniest guys to ever exist, god bless him.

I asked Kon to recount a storied bit from our past and he did a better job describing the above live-stream, bless him:

Hello and happy 2023 to all the Adult Swimfans out there, it's me Kon with a trip down memory lane to a fateful day in April 2007, when George Lowe hosted the ATHF movie premiere party. Adult Swim livestreamed it on their website, and George was hosting in the full Space Ghost costume. He was a very high energy host, kind of taking on an ironic persona of an old-timey showbiz emcee/carnival barker. Very intentionally corny and schtick-y. And: HILARIOUS! This was a very funny stream as I remember it and George was great. But it's one particular moment that I really want to discuss here…

The premiere was mostly attended by Williams Street staffers and ATHF animators and voice actors and such, with a few other Adult Swim-related people, including the Venture Bros guys, Seth Green, and Moral Orel's Scott Adsit. Scott made for one of the funniest moments of the evening. When he interacted with George, he seemed to be doing a bit where he played at being awkward and shy about the whole thing. George seemed to not really register that Scott was doing a bit and went louder and brasher and laid the old-time showbiz schtick on thick. Him going so big seemed to actually put Scott off, which in turn seemed to make George kind of feel like this guy was hanging him out to dry. Their brief interaction seemed to leave both of them unimpressed by the other. NOTE: This is all based on my memory of an webstream I watched once 16 years ago and may be inaccurate or just completely wrong. (SIDENOTE: if anyone with access to the Williams Street archive is reading this, please somehow leak the full livestream. Hell see if you can leak the entire Super Deluxe library too.)

This interaction was so funny to me and I loved the dynamic of two funny, similar-seeming guys being so worlds apart comedically. I thought they should have a show that captured that dynamic and devised a sitcom for them called BALD DUDES. The idea (all of which was conceived after the title) was that George Lowe and Scott Adsit play two aged bachelors who are nonetheless already lucky with the ladies, who each decide to move to the suburbs to take advantage of heightening divorce rates and the proliferation of hot single moms in the area. Independently of each other, they move into the same neighborhood, in houses next door to each other, on the same day. Each recognizing the other as a threat to the dating pool, they become enemies, and every episode is the two of them pulling pranks on each other to keep the other one from getting any cougar tail. Ideally this would air on late 90s USA network, but if not then late 00s Adult Swim will do.

The one thing I must add: I remember this bit very well, and I used to imagine the opening basically being that Cosby Show opening where they’re just dancing against a generic JC Pennys photo studio backdrop. It’s just the two dudes dancing a mild hip-hop dance with a lot of “urban” head wobbles. Also they are dressed in all denim and both of them are wearing hats as if to suggest they are both self-conscious about their baldness. Also they are having a good time, suggesting that they are friends in real life (though they are not, actually)

MAIL BAG

whats the deal with you say "eagle-eyed" all the time. Is that a space ghost reference or something?

What a weird guy you are: it is an “official saying” and the eagle is a national pet for America. The fuck planet are you on?

Will you be willing to do some random shoutouts on your blog. Can you shoutout my friend Muddy from San Bernardino. He's cool and he use to watch Aqua Teen with me when we were still doing shrooms in his moms basement. Miss you, Muddy. RIP

RIP Muddy thank you for being everyone’s friend and I hope they have Aqua Teens in heaven or hell

Can you rank your Top 5 Chris Kattan movies. I'm kind of on a Kattan kick (see my review of Monkeybone on letterboxd!)

I am embarrassed to admit that I’ve never seen Monkeybone. It’s one of those movies that my group of pals talk about as a future movie night movie. I’m basically saving it for that, I think. We don’t do movie nights a whole lot lately, but it’s so tailor-made for us that I wouldn’t dare watch it on my own.

As a result, I’ve seen only 6 Chris Kattan movies. Here they all are, ranked:

1. Walter Mellon’s Big Movie (2007) 2. A Night at the Roxbury (1998) 3. Corky Romano (2001) 4. Crazy Enough (2012) 5. House on Haunted Hill (1999) 6. Delgo (2008)

I saw the Roxbury movie while visiting Universal Studios. They randomly rounded up a bunch of people for a test screening and our family was very much an SNL family so we bit. I remember telling some kid at school about it, and he DID NOT believe me, and I had to explain the entire concept of a test screening to him. So I literally told him the entire movie from memory just to prove it for when he eventually saw it.

Corky Romano stinks. Fun fact: the movie was so bad that several people showed up and shot up various theaters showing it, but this went unreported because nobody else was in the theater when it happened.

Crazy Enough was a movie night pick, and it sucks diiiiick. There are some jaw-dropping moments in it. Delgo was another movie night thing, and I have no memory of it, so Delgo winds up at the end by default.

House on Haunted Hill was sort-of an awakening for me: I saw it and thought it was uniquely terrible. I was with a bunch of friends and I remembered being like “holy fuck, that might be the worst movie I’ve ever seen in my life” and they all looked at me quizzically and everyone else in my friend group “what? I thought it was pretty good” and I was astounded. I was so alone in my assessment of the film that I honestly thought maybe I was going crazy.

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #aqua teen hunger force

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