#apricot-studies

[gingergari]

i’ve been thinking about her for a while so this is the kid mario and peach would have IF peach ruled openly as a toad 🙏🏽

her name is apricot! when she gets older she also goes by the nickname albie :]

due to the circumstances regarding her existence she has quite the magical reserves and has the potential to eclipse her mom as a mage

but for now, she’s just a kid

[maeinschein]

30m warmup

[abba-enthusiast]

I always say I’m not a superstitious person but then exam seasons comes around and suddenly i will Die if I don’t abide by my Rituals

[verstarppen]

˗ˏˋ MASTERLIST ˎˊ˗

the pit stop for all your reading needs !

mv33 ｡⋆˚ max verstappen

max and the three musketeers — mercedes is a just a tiny bit worried about your dates with their archenemesis

ln4 ⋆⭒˚ lando norris

in a galaxy far, far away — there's little time between fast cars and spaceships, but you make it work

op81 ✩°˖ oscar piastri

[ WIP ] atalanta and hippomenes — your father is eager to marry you off, but you're not putting the ring for a man who can't beat you in a race

mv33 ｡⋆˚ max verstappen

best trophy in your showcase — cheaters deserve to get cheated out of their career, or at least that's how max justifies destroying your ex's life

cl16 ☾⋆˚ charles leclerc

oh no he's hot — your comic book signing takes a turn when a fan walks in wearing a t-shirt with a poorly photoshopped "charles lechair" or wheover that is [ WIP ] caramel splotches — charles makes an oddly specific reference to your youtube channel just once, but the internet decides to internet [ WIP ] apricot bowls — there's nothing charles wants more than to win a championship, but you, the baby and the cottage are a close second [ WIP ] beef? she's a vegetarian — no one could've possibly predicted the real reason why charles made a joke that he'll join eurovision 2024...but you do, and so does your ex

ls2 ✮⁺₊ logan sargeant

behind open doors — the relationship isn't as secretive as you think it is. texan egg hunt — the ricciardo urge to be obsessed with america takes a whole new meaning when your relationship with the only american on the grid is revealed...because of kinder eggs glitter bomb — logan has a very special helmet reveal on instagram to celebrate your olympics gold metal and a scavenger hunt seems like the appropriate way to reveal it to you she's everything, he's just logan — not to flex, but how many f1 drivers can say they're dating a princess?

gr63 ˖♡𓍢ִ໋ george russell

get on with the show... — mercedes have a strict policy regarding office romance, but that can't stop Totally Spies because they can't read

ll40 ⭒𓈒ㅤׂ liam lawson

[ WIP ] roller skate paparazzi — the guy you've been flirting with on the roller skate rink conveniently left out the part where he's super fucking famous

op81 ✩°˖ oscar piastri

[ WIP ] fly me to the moon — the world hadn't seen chaos until you parked a miniplane in the pit lane to bring your boyfriend lunchables [ WIP ] blueberry pastries — the mclaren and williams admins love taking advantage of the fact that you and oscar only seem to look like you're not absolutely miserable on camera when you're together meddle about — the singapore heat can't kill you, but the sight of him sweaty and disheveled just might

lh44 ౨ৎ ₊˚⊹ lewis hamilton

[ WIP ] vassastrophe — it'll take awhile for ferrari to adjust to lewis, and if that doesn't stress frédéric vasseur enough, the reveal of who his daughter's been seeing surely will

ln4 ⋆⭒˚ lando norris

[ WIP ] just a couple of besties — the king of spoilers himself, lando "oh is it confirmed?" norris, reveals to the whole world he has a girlfriend...and not a soul believes him. [ WIP ] el pollo verde — lando's obsession with studying spanish to impress fernando goes off and on track

dr3 ‧₊˚ daniel ricciardo

[ WIP ] you, me, and franz kafka — danny ric doesn't understand how a book about a guy turning into a insect can be interesting, but if it makes his girlfriend happy he'll read it- and maybe melt a few fans' hearts along the way

yt22 ★⋆.⁺ yuki tsunoda

cheap tricks on route 66 — losing a bag at a out-of-city gas station with an etched phone number seems a little too convenient doesn't it?

ms47 ❀˖˙⊹ mick schumacher

count me in — slowly but surely that fake dating plan you cooked up starts leaving its confined lines

last updated: 9/10/2024

[steddiealltheway]

Steve is forced by his parents to go to a New Year’s work event where he knows no one. And before he goes, his mother gives him a rundown of the general rules of his behavior - including not eating or drinking anything there. She doesn’t want to risk him spilling anything on his expensive suit or embarrassing her with the way he eats.

So Steve goes to the event and is entirely miserable. His parents ditch him early on and he just wanders around the venue making brief small talk with some of his parents' coworkers. He sticks to his mother’s main topics - his age, lying about where he goes to college and what he’s studying, and the damn weather.

The food looks absolutely enticing, but it seems like every time he wants to sneak something off a platter the caterers are bringing around, his mother is watching him. So he adverts his eyes, keeping his gaze low but then his father comes by to whisper how he looks too submissive and not like a man, so he’s forced to straighten up.

Then he spots him, a caterer scowling as he attempts to balance a platter while blowing a strand of dark, curly hair out of his face. His hair is messily tied up in a bun he looks like he was forced to wear along with a suit he keeps pulling at. Steve has never felt like he’s related to someone more.

The man’s doe eyes land on Steve, catching him staring at him, and Steve quickly looks away and back towards his parents. To his surprise, they aren’t looking at him to mess up for once, too busy seemingly sucking up to someone “important.”

Steve takes the opportunity to glance back over at the man, but instead of finding him where he used to be, he’s steadily approaching him - platter of what looks to be fancy skewed meatballs in hand. Steve has never been more miserable by his mother’s rules - no eating and absolutely no talking to the caterers.

By now the man is in front of him, scowl gone and replaced with a soft smile as he offers him the platter. Steve politely shakes his head with a tight smile. The man frowns, and Steve wonders if he saw how intently he was eyeing the food before he declined. Nonetheless, the caterer continues on, even passing by his parents who both grab a skewer after the person who they’re talking to does.

Steve’s hands flex and he pinches his nose as he continues on, trying to push down the bubbling anger. He runs into a different couple and has the same damn conversation all over again before moving on to the next.

But then it happens again, the man with the messy bun and small dimples approaches him with a different platter - this time with smoked salmon. Steve politely refuses again, and the man’s frown tugs a little deeper.

For the next half hour, it’s as if the man is following him around, different platter each time - shrimp tartlets, deviled eggs, caprese salad kabobs, crab cake stuffed mushrooms, bacon-wrapped apricots, chocolate covered cheese, cheesecake bites…. All of which Steve politely refuses as the man frowns at him as if personally offended.

As the party drags on, Steve gets more and more bored and antsy. He just feels so shut in and hangry and he needs to get air. Whoever’s mansion they’re in has to have some type of balcony, so Steve wanders some more, spotting the staircase he’s passed several times, red rope making it off limits.

There’s a bit of commotion when the champagne tower comes out, and as everyone is distracted, Steve easily steps over the rope and sneaks up the stairs. When he’s hidden from sight, he lets out a sigh of relief and continues his search. He quickly finds a suspicious set of curtains on a wall, and he pulls them back.

Perfect. The doors are simple and white but to Steve’s surprise they slide apart. Dramatic. But it’s a balcony. He makes his way outside, closing the curtains and doors behind him before he takes in a breath of cold air. He feels better already.

There are two white chairs that look beautiful but incredibly uncomfortable, so Steve settles for sitting on the ground, putting his legs between the slats on the balcony railing, and glancing down at the large outdoor pool. Happy new year to him. He sighs.

The door behind him opens, and Steve whips his head around ready to be chewed out by his family or the owner.

“Shhh,” the server shushes him dramatically putting a finger to his mouth. He sets a platter filled with various finger foods down on the balcony table then closes the curtains and door behind him.

Steve stares unsure of what to do or say. His heart thuds in his chest. “So, here’s the thing,” the man says, “all night I’ve seen you practically drooling over this food, but every time you’ve refused it. At first, I thought maybe you were vegetarian, but then you refused the meatless options. Then I thought you might have some type of weird allergies, but then you refused the food that was specifically made for that. So, my question is, why are you not eating?”

Steve stares at him for a moment and finally replies, “My mother told me not to.”

The man's eyebrows pinch together. “Do you want food?”

“Desperately."

The man smiles brightly and dramatically gestures to the tray. “Voila!”

Steve glances at the tray with items stacked on top of each other because it seems like the other man ran out of space when making it. “That’s all for me?” Steve asks with the first smile of the day tugging at his lips.

The man picks up the platter and sets it next to Steve, sitting beside him. "I snuck a few bites for myself throughout the party, so yes." Steve laughs and immediately digs into the platter. "Good choice on the French rosemary chicken linguini," the man says.

Steve gives him a look while finishing chewing. "I thought this was steak."

"This is why they pay me not to speak," the man says with a cheeky grin. "I'm Eddie by the way."

"Steve," he replies, holding out his hand for Eddie to shake. Eddie grabs it and kisses the back of it. Steve laughs, "You're strange, you know that?"

"Absolutely," Eddie replies and leans in to bump his shoulder against Steve's.

They continue chatting, with Eddie spewing out some random name for whatever Steve is sampling. Every time it manages to make Steve laugh which in turn makes Eddie smile wider and scoot closer. And whenever Steve tries something he absolutely hates, Eddie will have part of the other half and either shame Steve for his horrible picky taste or break the food apart to toss through the slats to see who can get closer to getting their piece in the pool. Steve wins that game a lot.

When the food starts thinning out, Steve tells Eddie how he partially wishes the lies his mother told him to tell the others were true. How he wishes he was in college doing something instead of staying at home because he hadn't gotten into any college. Eddie tells him how he flunked out three times before he dropped out of high school. The catering job is just for the night as he samples around what he wans to do. Steve admires him for that.

They make plans as if they were going to run away together. Where they would go and what they would do if they could. Steve would teach kids and Eddie would play guitar for a living. As the night goes on, Steve is almost convinced that their dreams could maybe become a reality.

From the balcony, they can hear the distant cheers of a New Year's countdown. "Think we could do it this year?" Steve asks, countdown to eight.

"Run away together?" Eddie asks, countdown six.

"And make the life we want," Steve replies sincerely, countdown to four.

Eddie pauses and considers for a moment. "I would love to," he replies and leans forward, countdown to one.

Steve meets him in the middle and kisses him as if it this was possible and he could turn his dreams into a reality. He breaks away and whispers, "Happy New Year, Eddie."

"Happy New Year, Steve," Eddie replies smiling against his lips.

Steve kisses him again knowing his parents are going to be screaming at him later, but it won't matter when he's packing his bags for the New Year.

[latenightdaydreams]

Oh my goodness!! I absolutely loved your doll-sized! reader x König so so much. Could you perhaps make a part 2 where she tries to escape, but König puts her in the jar 😵‍💫 or maybe he punishes her by overstimulating her with his tongue…

Yes🤭😮‍💨

König x Doll Sized!Reader PT2(fem)

MDNI🔞

Part 1

Master List

>cw: fem/afab, masturbation, oral, cum play, captive, non-con

2.6k word count

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That night, you didn't sleep. You spend all night trying to escape from this closet. Breaking off the small plastic bar in your closet to see if you can break a small part of the door, looking for holes in the wall, nothing. You find yourself completely trapped within. With a feeling of defeat, you drop to the floor and curl into a ball. Tears fall from your eyes until you slowly fall asleep.

König wakes up early the next morning with a new found pep in his step. The fact he has you here, so close, gives him a rush he hasn’t felt in a long time. He enters his kitchen, going into the refrigerator and grabbing eggs to prepare for the both of you. On one plate, he loads it up with scrambled eggs, toast with jam, and sausage for you both to share.

He climbs back upstairs, opening his bedroom door, and locking it behind him. Sitting the plate of food down on his nightstand, he opens the closet door. There you are, in your purple dress, asleep on the floor. It’s obvious that you were trying to escape; he knew you would, but had hoped you would have come to terms with things overnight. Your closet is a mess and pieces of wood chippings are on the floor from the door.

König’s eyes trail over your body as he kneels down. Your eyes flutter open as you feel yourself being picked up. Panic sets in as you realize König has grabbed you in your sleep. He watches as you wake up in his hands. A look of dread crosses your face, upsetting König. He’s so used to you being happy to see him, now you’re acting as if you don’t even like him.

“I made breakfast for both the of us.” He says, sitting on the bed and placing you next to him.

The large plate of food is placed in front of you, the bread and sausage cut smaller for you to take bites. König’s eyes study your expression as you look at everything before you. He reaches out with the backs of his middle and pointer fingers, caressing the side of your face. You flinch slightly, but don’t make any sudden movements.

“Eat, kleine Maus.” König’s eyes follow the outline of your body in that dress. “It’s good, I promise. Those are chicken eggs with beef and pork sausage.”

You lean forward and grab a piece of the bread, taking a bite and smiling when you taste the sweet apricot jam. König lets out a breath he had been holding in, wondering if you’d eat. He loves to watch your mouth wrap around the pieces of bread. The way a bit of jam sticks to your upper lip.

Despite everything, you seem to have been able to maintain your cheery disposition. Not making any attempts to flee and actually eating peacefully with him. Of course, König is going to maintain a close eye on you, but he’s happy to see that you’re not freaking out.

Once you’re done eating you sit back with your arms behind you to prop you up. “Thank you for the food, König.”

“Of course. I’m happy you enjoyed it all.” His eyes study your face before speaking again. “You’re so beautiful. I’m so happy that you’re mine.”

You notice his other arm moving, your eyes falling on it and notice that he is rubbing his boner as he looks at you. An uncomfortable look crosses your face, remembering how he acted with you yesterday. König watches you as you fidget, he’s aware of your feelings but he doesn’t care. He’s horny and he wants to know what he can do with you.

“Undress, Maus.” He more so demands of you as he moves the plate of food.

“König, please don’t make me.”

“I don’t want to hear any back-talk. Take. It. Off.” His voice is almost a low growl.

You stand to your feet and begin to undo your dress, letting it drop onto the bed sheets. Avoiding his gaze, you look down at the blue comforter. The bed moves as König stands and fully undresses before you. Your eyes scan over every inch of his body, landing on his erection.

König reaches forward and grasps you in his fist, holding you as he lets himself get comfortable on the bed. As he settles down on his abdomen, he uses his hands to gently open your legs. He slowly rubs up and down your small thighs, enjoying how delicate your flesh feels. One of his fingers runs down your thigh lower and lower…until he’s slowly moving his finger up and down your tiny cunt. Your legs jerk in reaction to his massive finger rubbing your clit. An arrogant smirk crosses his lips as he watches you struggle to control yourself.

He adjusts his body to rest on his side so his free hand can reach down and stroke his cock. The finger that is slowly rubbing your clit moves to the side to hold your leg open for him. At first, he takes a deep breath, smelling what your natural musk smells like. With one deep inhale, he’s hooked. You smell better than any human he’s ever smelt before.

“Mein Gott, you smell wie eine Blume.” His German and English get mixed as his excitement grows.

You try to close your other leg to take away access to yourself. His hand moves from his cock to your other leg and holds it down. “Don’t be a nuisance.”

König lowers his head and swipes the very tip of his tongue over your sweet cunt, his eyes closing instantly. It was as if he had just eaten the sweetest cake he’s ever tasted in his entire life. The tip of his tongue is big enough to cover every inch of your pussy. He simply wiggles his tongue back and forth pulling precious whimpers from your lips.

“König, too much!” You moan loudly as your back arches.

“Mhm.” He grunts back to you.

The way your body moves as you become overwhelmed with pleasure is spectacular. His lips wrap around you and sucks lightly. In response, the muscles in your abdomen tense up and you lean forward. Your small hands press against his face trying to push him away from overstimulating you. He’s simply too big to move. With all of your might you try to close your legs, causing König to chuckle.

“I want you to cum in my mouth.” He says, pulling back slightly before diving back in.

Your breathing is heavy as you pant from his mouth consuming you. As you writhe beneath him, his cock twitches with excitement. All his mind can think of is slipping his cock into you, but logically he knows that he can’t. You’re so small he would rip you apart if he tried.

Electric waves of euphoria pleasure pulse throughout your whole body. Every little suck or swirl of his tongue pushes you to the point the pleasure is almost painful. There is no break, just constant ecstasy. You begin to shake your head side to side as primal moans escape you.

As you orgasm, König loosens his grip on your legs. He moves one arm back down to jerk himself off. His eyes watch you as your eyes flutter and roll back in your head. What a beautiful sight you are.

“Gott, you taste so good.”

While you pant, trying to recover, he grabs your body and moves how he’s positioned in the bed. He leans back against his pillows and holds you, bringing you to his cock. It’s almost the full length of your body and wider than you are. Seeing the comparison of you in one hand next to his cock in the other makes his mind run wild.

“I wish I could fuck you.” His voice drips with hunger.

König jerks himself off as he holds you close to him. The musk coming off of him consuming your nostrils. He brings you closer to him, his hand moving off of himself as he presses you against him.

“Lick it.”

With hesitation, you slowly stick your tongue out and swipe a quick lick over his foreskin. König pulls it back to expose his pink tip.

“Again.”

You close your eyes so you don’t have to see as you lick your flat tongue along the head of his cock. It tastes salty from all of the precum that has leaked down it. König lets out a moan as he feels you. It’s small, but the visual of you doing it is stimulating enough for him to cum.

“Use that fucking tongue.” He groans.

As disgusted as you are, you don’t want the giant to be upset with you so you rest one hand on his cock as you slick with passion, sucking lightly. König watches down at you with half lidded eyes, enjoying the way you’re eagerly trying to please him.

Right when he feels as if he is ready to cum, his doorbell rings. König lets out an annoyed sigh as he puts you down on the bed. He quickly stands, grabbing his pants before peaking out the window to see who it is. Once he notices the mail truck, he puts his pants on.

“I’ll be right back. I just have to sign for a package.” He leaves, closing the bedroom door behind him.

For a moment you freeze, your heart beating quickly in your chest. Now is the time. You walk to the edge of the bed, looking down at the distance to the floor. It’s at least a two-foot drop that could hurt you. In a rush your eyes scan the bed, noticing how the night stand has a safe next to it, causing a small stair effect.

Without giving it a second thought you rush to jump the small gap between the bed and the night stand. You steady yourself on the cold wood, walking over the remote and ash tray that rest on it. Getting closer to the edge, you look down at the black metal safe. The drop is big, but you know you can do it without getting hurt.

With a deep breath, you turn and drop yourself down slowly. Once your feet touch the metal a wave of relief comes over you. Not even looking this time, you turn and lower yourself down to the floor the same way. Now with feet on the floor, you run to the door, trying to fit underneath the gap in between the door and the floor. As much as you try, it’s not use, you don’t fit.

Letting out a frustrated sigh, you rub your face with your hands. König closes the front door with the package in his hand and begins to walk up the stairs. He goes to his office and places the package on his desk in the office to work on later tonight. You can hear his footsteps approaching so you decide to hide up against the wall and just make a run for it once he opens the door.

Your heart thumps in your chest as you wait. It’s as if things move in slow motion when you see the door opening. Once one of his feet is past the threshold, you run. König isn’t stupid, he quickly sees that you’re missing from the bed. His eyes dart everywhere around the room when he hears you behind him.

“Stop!” he shouts at you as you turn into one of the open doors, hoping to use your size to be able to hide from him.

The room you ran into is his office, where he spends his time making things for you. König is hot on your trail. He isn’t going to let you go this easily. As he enters the room, he closes the door behind him.

“Kleine Maus, you’ve only made this worse for yourself.” He taunts as he slowly steps forward. “Now you get to sit in a jar instead of your comfortable bed.”

The way he speaks sends a chill down your spine; you know he means it. The jar isn’t something you plan on experiencing. You look around for a place to conceal yourself until he moves on, looking at a stack of files. You slowly try to get behind the stack, but one accidental slip of your hand sends them all crashing down.

König turns in that direction and rushes to you quickly. “You’re not getting away.” He growls as he pulls the files over more to see you.

You run but before you can make any distance, König’s massive hand squeezes around you. This time his grip hurts. With all of your might you kick and hit him with your hands but nothing works. He doesn’t even look at you as he stalks over to his desk with urgent speed. You see a large mason jar and panic sets in.

“Please don’t put me in there König, I’ll suffocate.” You plead desperately.

“I drilled holes in the lid, I’m not a fucking idiot.” He says with irritation in his voice.

König lifts the lid up and drops you into the jar, your body hitting the glass with a ding. You look up as he closes you inside. He picks up the jar and holds you face level with himself, his gaze holding a lot of anger.

“Why did you try to run?!” He yells at you.

“I just want to go home.” You cry out and hit the side of the jar.

“No! You are home!” His shouts vibrate the glass jar.

He slams you down on the desk, once again rattling you. Your body falls hard against the glass as you look up. The rage you’ve feared is showing its ugly head. As you stand up and steady yourself, you watch König pull his pants back down, whipping his cock back out.

König stands and unleashes his anger out on his cock. His eyes travel all over your body, still tasting your sweet pussy on his tongue. You’re such a naughty fucking woman, a sweet little whore…his whore.

“Say you want my cum.”

“I want your cum.” You say quickly, this isn’t a time to try and anger him. Instead, you fawn instantly.

“Ja, du kleine Hure.” König moans out as he steps closer to the jar.

He stops to open the lid, bringing himself closer to the desk. His fist moving quickly up and down his cock as he aims it into the jar. Pathetic moans leave König as thick globs of his cum fall down into the jar, some falling on to you and covering your hair and face. You gag from the smell and sticky feeling as it covers you. His jizz fills the jar up to your ankles.

König looks down and sees you covered, disgusted with what he just did. A chuckle leaves his lips as he watches your reaction. “What? You don’t like my cum?”

You don’t respond, trying to remain calm so he will let you out. He isn’t going to though. You’re staying in that cum filled jar for the whole day, maybe even days. Maybe he will just keep filling the jar up, covering you until you’re consumed by his seed.

The warm cum sticks to your hair, slowly falling down your naked body. There is nowhere for you to sit or relax without having to sit in his cum. The small space traps the smell inside with you. It is absolutely disgusting.

König closes the lid again, tightly, trapping you within. He sits down in his desk chair and looks at you for a moment. Wondering how he can fuck you. What can he shove inside of you without hurting you? His eyes drift from you to the desk full of craft supplies. He notices a dried drop from his hot glue gun, picking it up and bending it. Just then an idea enters his mind, his gaze meeting yours with a mischievous smirk on his face.

[serene-studies]

03/09/24 | 17:05 | the national library

Study day 🍊

Had my fav peanut butter and (apricot) jelly sandwiches for breakfast. Otherwise I’m spending the entire day in the library since there’s only seven days left until my last exam before the next semester starts.

🎧 Skorupa; Wierzynkiewicz: Flotsam At Sunrise in The Witcher 2 Assassins of Kings Soundtrack

📖 Pekař, Josef: Bílá hora

🩶 Energy: rather tired but still happy because of my yesterday’s latin exam results

[sunlightmurdock]

The Odyssey | 1.5 | Bradley Bradshaw

previous chapter | next chapter | masterlist

chapter moodboard

Bradley learns that maybe the two of you weren’t on the same page after all.

Warnings: enemies to lovers, power imbalance (professor / student relationship), age gap (22 / 33), swearing, infidelity, nudity, mentions of erections, making out. Semi-oral (f receiving), touching, mentions of sex. Ohhh boy you thought it was all okay. Wc: 5.8k

It didn’t feel like seven days at the Gabris estate. It felt like so much longer. A whole summer, even. The sunny day down at the lake, and then two whole days of rainstorms, and the day that Teodora showed you how to know which apricots are the sweetest to pick, the day that Zoe twisted her ankle on the crumbling back steps. The night by the piano.

This morning. 

Luke must know where Bradley is, after he didn’t go to their room last night. Maybe he would think Bradley fell asleep in the study, but he isn’t that stupid. 

Of course, Bradley is here with you. He fell asleep here last night, shortly after you had. He’s still asleep now, breathing deeply against the crook of your neck, his thigh slotted between yours and his palm on your stomach.

You haven’t been awake long. 

It’s a warm, sunny morning and you can hear Sandro’s wife singing in the kitchen downstairs. Bradley smells like summer. You twist in his arms and turn your face toward his neck, breathing in the citrus and faint sweat and remainders of his cologne. 

Bradley wakes to the feeling of your lips soft against his neck, and your fingers stroking at the hair at his nape.

Instantly, he realises that he didn’t make it back to his own bed last night, but he can’t find it in himself to mind. His arms snake around your middle and he squeezes you closer. He’s in your room. Not only that, but he’s in your bed. You’re laying on your side, the textbook half squished under you. The two of you fell asleep studying. He’s still fully clothed, and that’s what matters. 

He lifts his arm and squints to check his watch. It’s still early. The two of you slept almost all night. Lowering his wrist, he startles once more to find that your eyes are now open. You blink tiredly at him.

“We fell asleep.” You mumble, barely awake. Your legs stretch out from under you as you push yourself onto your back and inch away from him. You’re close enough that all you can smell is his cologne. Each inhale tempts you towards letting your heavy eyelids just fall shut, letting your cheek rest against the muscle of his shoulder.

“Morning,” You murmur against his neck. 

He kisses lazily at your temple. “Good morning, honey.”

Last night, Bradley had touched you again. The two of you had been sitting on your bed, and you were teaching him the Wall Street way of playing poker — as skilfully learned from your time watching your father — and Bradley had, so crudely, wagered your underwear.

They are laying, discarded, on the floor of your room now. 

It feels good, pretending that none of this matters. That he is allowed to touch you, and lay with you, and kiss you. 

“Did you sleep okay?” One of his palms pressed firmer into the middle of your back, flattening you against his chest as he turns his face  toward your neck. 

“Like the dead.” You mumble against his warm skin, resting your cheek against his clavicle. He hums amusedly.

For a moment, you let it be quiet. He’s still on the cusp of sleep, barely awake and groggy. Your fingers skim up the swell of his bicep and across the scarred skin on his shoulder, onto the muscled plains of his back.

He hums at the feeling, letting you know that he’s enjoying the soft touch. Maybe you’re enjoying it just as much. His skin there is soft, and always warm. You reach for freckles that you can’t see, guided by the ridges of his shoulder blades. 

“I could stay like this forever.” You whisper. He makes a tired sound of agreement as he rubs the sleep from his eyes. 

Sighing as he pulls his hands from his face, he pulls back and lets himself look at you. Settled down against the pillow, just watching him. Studying him.

Eyes heavy and blinking at him. Lips parted just slightly, like you’ve got something to say. The warmth of your skin. The look in your eye. The fact that he knows your underwear are still on the floor.

Bradley moves before he really weighs up what he’s doing. Eclipsing your jaw with his palm, you hold your breath as he leans in and kisses your top lip. 

It’s slow, but the feelings it sends through you aren’t. The soft weight of his chest pressing into yours, just a taste of what the real thing could feel like. 

Another slow kiss, his fingers curling around the nape of your neck, pulling you closer. You comply eagerly, pressing into his touch. His knee slides between yours, finding leverage on the mattress between your thighs.

Your mind skips ahead of you, flooding the darkness behind your eyelids with images of him that night with Natasha. His hands inching along the backs of her bare thighs. The need coursing through them, pressing close to each other with each kiss. 

His warmth is inviting, intoxicating. His palm sits heavy on your cheek as you shuffle impossibly closer to him. He welcomes you against him, covering you with a fraction of his weight. Bradley likes strong women. Experienced women. 

You rush forwards, chasing his mouth, grabbing at his shoulder, tugging him closer. He follows your lead wordlessly, carding his open palm over your hair, teasing his tongue along your lip. 

It occurs to you that this could be the first time that you ever have sex. Everything you’ve been so afraid of. Ashamed of. Enveloped, hidden away by the strong feeling of his hands on your body.

It could happen. All that’s stopping you is his underwear, and the fact that he told you he wouldn’t. But he wants to. He told you he wants to.

A greedy hum passes your lips, caught against his. Your fingers slide from his shoulder into his hair before you can remind yourself that this isn’t right. 

At first, Bradley thinks that he’s imagining things. There’s no way. But then, it happens again just as it had the first time. Your hips shift at just the right angle — the third time is just too much for it to be a coincidence, you’re grinding against his thigh.

A low grumble fights its way from his chest and into his throat, his hands sprinting for you like the snap of a rubber band, grabbing you tightly by your hips. It crosses his mind that he’s moving too fast and considers pulling back to check. Before his mind can land on an answer, your hand tousles into his curls and grabs firmly.

Even all of those too-big shirts he wears, nothing could really hide the fact that Bradley just remains to be a big guy. Tall, wide shoulders, long legs and a strong middle. He reminds you of his strength, dragging you against him by your hips. The brown hair that dusts his thigh brushes the inside of your thighs, the apex of your legs.

“How’s that?” Bradley asks as his thumb brushes a strand of hair back off of your temple. 

Heat flushes instantly across your face. Bradley sees it in the calculated way that your eyes widen just slightly. The way he feels your fingers flex at the nape of his neck.

“It’s fine.” You bite back. Bradley should have known that even in a time like this, you would still be fighting him for the upper hand. Not tonight, honey. His words cross your mind, this time tinged with the resentment and shame your mind has coated them in. 

You’re certain that he hasn’t ever told Natasha no in her entire life.

He trails his tongue along the seam of your lips, slow and soft, then brushes forwards and captures your mouth into a bruising kiss. He barely even pulls back to speak, his lips brushing yours. “Tell me what you want.” 

You whimper. His massive hands and their hold on your hips, rocking you against the denim of his jeans. It’s impossible to think straight. “I don’t know.”

“I know what I want.” Bradley tells you, tucking his thumb under your chin and angling your jaw so that he can bite at your throat. The action has you keening against him, eagerly following the direction of his thumb so that his mouth can reach more of your throat.

 It’s cruel honestly, everything he’s doing to you. He’s the first man to tell you that he wants you. Not because you’ve been together a while and it’ll happen eventually. Because he thinks you’re sexy. He’s attracted to you. He wants you. And fuck, his voice is so deep. “Tell me what you want.”

“I — Bradley, I don’t —“ You sigh, huffing a deep and frustrated noise as he sucks warmly at your skin. “I want you to touch me… I think.”

“You think?” Bradley’s hand sits against the backside of your thigh, warm, his long fingers splayed out along your skin. His lips barely have to move before he’s sucking at your neck. His warm mouth, languid against your skin. Swiftly, he curls his fingers into the soft flesh of your hips and tugs you against him, working you against his thigh.

The friction ignites something. Something you’ve felt before. The kindling is hot but it’s all white smoke for now. Blinking, you stare up at him with a decision to make. He squeezes your hips.

“I do. I do want you to touch me.”

The expectation is that he’ll pull back and tear your nightdress up out of his way and have his way with you. Bradley nips at your throat compliantly, kissing his way down your jaw and your throat.

He tips you onto your back and follows suit, settling between your thighs. The morning sun covers him in gold, from the flecks in his irises and the strands in his curls to the tanned swell of his shoulders. He mouths at your collarbones, following the sweetheart neckline of your nightie, palming at your thighs.

A moan tangles from your lips as he flattens himself against your body, his bulge between your legs and his hot chest against your skin. 

Bradley dips his hand between your bodies and feels you finally. He sighs against your chest, smiling. “Oh, honey.” 

Your heartbeat thuds. His fingers graze your swollen clit and you jolt a bit, otherwise stuck to the spot by his weight. 

“No wonder you want me right here,” He murmurs, gathering your excitement on the tips of his fingers. “All worked up. Don’t worry, honey. I’ve got you.”

You drop your head back onto the pillows, feeling electricity rush through your middle as Bradley circles your clit with a featherlight touch. A whimper slips your mouth despite your best efforts, despite your teeth sinking into your bottom lip.

“I want to do it.” 

And then you have his attention. He looks up at you, his face stark and the smugness that had settled there all gone.

“Yeah?” He swallows, so hard already that he’s aching. Far from in the mind space to really disagree with you. His brows draw together. “It?” 

This time yesterday, you probably would have said no. Maybe even last night, you would have. 

This morning, it’s a breathless and desperate, “Yes.”

“I don’t —“ Bradley squeezes at your thigh and shakes his head. “Baby, I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“It’s just one step further than this,” You tell him, convincing yourself as much as you’re convincing him. “Doesn’t make it any different. It doesn’t change what we’ve already done, right?”

In these past seven days, Malcolm has never felt as far away. After what he did, what he must have done, you’ve never felt as far from him as you do now. He’s probably been looking for a phone number to contact you, and you’re glad that he hasn’t found one.

You don’t want to speak to him. In this moment, all that you want is right in front of you.

“But…” He swallows thickly, trying not to be driven by how badly he wants this. He taps his thumb against your chin. “You’re — You’re sure, this is what you want?”

“Uh-huh.” 

He hesitates, planting a hand into the pillow beside your head. His face is knotted up and unsure. A week ago you had been crying in his arms after the biggest betrayal of your life. This can’t be the right thing to do.

He glances down, feeling your fingers brushing along the ridges of his abdomen. 

Your lip throbs with the weight of your teeth pressing into it as your fingers dip into the waistband of his white boxer shorts. Bradley’s breath catches as your fingers wrap around his hardened length.

“Please?”

A deep sound passes his lips. How’s a guy supposed to say no to that? He leans in slowly, capturing your lip between his, his tense body melting against yours.

He groans as he pulls away from your mouth and moves downward. Your hand slips from his underwear and finds purchase against his shoulder.

 He kisses down your cheek and your jaw, spilling dirty kisses along the naked span of your chest as far as the nightgown will let him as his hands bunch at the bottom hem of it.

Your mouth hangs as he hunches over and pins your thighs back.

Glistening in the warm glow of the room, you writhe and wriggle beneath Bradley as his strong hands pin you down, lazily swirling his tongue along your puffy, swollen clit. 

“I said — I want—“ You stumble, your brows knitting together.

“I know what you want,” Bradley interrupts, turning his head and kissing at your thigh, silencing you all together as he looks up at you with those big brown eyes. “There’s no rush. Right?”

You guess not. You don’t have time to guess at much before his broad shoulders force apart your thighs and his hot mouth blanks your mind.

A whine spills from somewhere deeper in your throat, coming right from the pit of your stomach. Bradley’s messy with his work, lapping eagerly between your legs as his middle finger teases at your dripping pussy. He hasn’t ever done it like this.

 It’s more desperate now, but like it’s easy for him, like he knows you. His chin drips with your excitement, leaving your thighs sticky and dampened with slick and saliva.

His hand slips between his hips and the mattress, wrapping loosely around his cock over his boxers, grinding his hips into his hand.

And then, three knocks rattle the heavy, old door to your right. 

Bradley stops, and sits back on his knees at once. Your face is colorless, eyes wide and round. He runs a hand over his wet mouth, and turns his head towards the sound.

“Fuck.” He exhales, his lips hinting at a smile. As much as he should look just as scared shitless as you do, something in him finds this a little bit funny.

He’s expecting it to be your new best buddies, wanting you to come down to breakfast with them. Already deciding that he can handle hiding behind the door while you get rid of them, Bradley couldn’t be cooler.

Three more knocks rattle the old door on its hinges, and Sandro calls out from the other side. “Bradley?” 

Instantly, the smile is wiped from Bradley’s face. 

You scramble to cover yourself and close your legs and move, not quite as aware of your surroundings as you could be. As Bradley goes to move at the same time, your knee lifts and catches him squarely in the balls.

Sandro pushes his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he hears a loud, strained grunt come from inside.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry — I didn’t—“

Bradley lifts his face out of the pillow and swallows as he adjusts himself, exhaling heavily. “It’s fine. Fuck— what the hell is the matter with him?”

Matter with him in the sense that he is impolite enough to know exactly where Bradley is, and what that must mean, and to be knocking on the door anyway.

You watch as Bradley stumbles to his feet, clearly wounded, still clutching at his manhood as he picks up his jeans. 

“You can’t — you’re going to answer the door?” You panic. 

“What else do you want me to do? Hide?” He huffs, struggling to pull his jeans up his legs and button them.

“You could go out the window.” 

He shoots you a look, entirely unimpressed. You open your mouth to protest, left with no time to do anything but squeak softly in defeat as he pulls open the door an inch, blocking it with his body.

“What?” 

Sandro presses his lips together. He looks Bradley up and down. Disheveled, his curls a mess and still naked from the navel upward.

“There’s someone on the phone for you.” Sandro explains quietly. Bradley’s brows knit together as he starts to wonder who could possibly be trying to reach him this early in the morning. “Her father. I believe.” 

A quiet gasp comes from behind the door. Bradley closes it a little more, slotting himself into the gap.

“Cool. I’ll be right there.”

“Sure. He sounds upset.” Sandro lifts his palms and shrugs as he takes a step back from the door, his mouth twitching. “I can’t imagine why.”

“Ha. Ha.” Bradley answers, unimpressed.

He swings the door shut, and flattens himself back against the wood as he pinches at the bridge of his nose. You remain in the middle of the bed, your knees tucked up to your chest, your hand covering your mouth.

“Fuck me.” Bradley sighs, leaning his head back against the door. He stretches his hand into the pocket of his jeans and plucks his cigarettes from the pocket, shaking his head. “Does he have a monitor on you that I don’t know about?”

He almost makes you smile, but you’re wincing as you slip out of bed and stand up. 

“Let me speak with him,” You offer, walking nervously toward him. “He’s just going to be rude if he’s asking for you. I’ll handle it.” 

“And miss out on telling him what an incredible morning we had?” Bradley jokes, unlit cigarette wobbling between his lips as he steps around you and reaches for his shirt. You stumble mid-step, practically pouncing on him as you grab at his arm.

“No! You can’t tell him anything.” You plead.

Bradley turns and looks at you over his shoulder, brows furrowed in disbelief. 

“Believe it or not, honey — I’m not itching to have that talk with your dad. I was kidding.” He scoffs, pulling his t-shirt over his head and running his fingers messily through his hair. “You should pack your stuff. I’ll… see you later.”

“Wait!” You frown at him. “But we were…”

Bradley seems to remember his moment of insanity then — of how close he was to actually doing it just a moment ago, and blinks at you. He plucks the cigarette from his lips and leans forward to leave a passive kiss to your temple.

“Another time,” He sets it between his lips again and digs his left hand into his pocket for a lighter. “Gotta go.”

Another time. Gotta go. The door swings shut behind him and the smell of burning tobacco fills your nose as he light’s the cigarette out in the hallway. You hate that smell. You hate how casually he just moved on from that. And oh, you could kill Alessandro. 

“Hello?” Bradley pins the receiver between his ear and shoulder as he pulls the ashtray from the window ledge and flicks the tip of his cigarette toward it.

“That’s how you answer the phone? — You don’t introduce yourself, or ask who you’re speaking with? Mumbling over there—“

Bradley perches against the window and sets his cigarette back between his lips. “I know who I’m speaking with. Sir. How can I help you?” 

“I want to know what kind of operation you’re running over there. There’s no contact number for this place anywhere on the itinerary, and then when I do finally track down a number, I spend two days calling and get nothing but a dead line!”

“We had some bad weather, unfortunately it knocked out the power. Just got it back on last night, actually.” Bradley explains calmly. 

“And you think that’s acceptable? — What if it was an emergency?”

“Was it?” Bradley prompts. Maybe he has a little bit of an attitude, but he doesn’t like the way your father talks to people.

“You think you’re funny, son?”

No, generally Bradley doesn’t think that he’s too funny. He’s a lot of things, and he’s got a good sense of humour but he’s not funny like Robin Williams or Chevy Chase. But, Bradley’s got a special knack for always being able to get the last word.

“I think the house is five hundred years old and has some pretty questionable wiring. Was there something you needed me for?” 

“You know that I can have you fired?”

Bradley leans his head back and thunks it against the window frame. He can’t blame you for the attitude you catch when this is the guy you learned it from.

“In the interest of preserving my good friend’s phone bill, I’m just trying to be… concise, here.” Bradley answers, flicking more ash into the tray. If this phone call keeps going the way that it is, Bradley figures he’ll be chain smoking through until the afternoon.

“My son-in-law has been trying to get through to my daughter. He’s… worried about her. Has she said anything to you?”

Said something pretty interesting to me earlier, Bradley thinks. Right around the time she stuck her hand in my shorts.

“No, sir. Maybe her friends, but not me,” Bradley gives the answer you would want him to give. “We’re headed to Siena this afternoon and the city’s a lot more reliable for communication and stuff. I can have her call you once we’re there?”

“No. Don’t tell her that I called.” Your father decides. Bradley doesn’t mention that you already know, because he was in your room when he was informed. “What’s the number for this place?”

“I don’t have it on me. I can take down your number and I’ll call you from the hotel when we get there.”

“Not very organised for a college professor, are you, champ?”

Bradley wets his lips with his tongue and presses them together. He spends as little time on the phone as he possibly can, resenting your father’s every word. He likes the thought of Malcolm sitting at home and tearing his hair out, worrying.

He likes the thought of that little dirtbag being kept awake at night, terrified that you know what he did and that you’ll leave him. It’s what he deserves.

Bradley likes that you fell asleep in his arms last night, peacefully, and that you woke up this morning and found yourself comfortable enough to ask for what you had. Your fiancé probably didn’t cross your mind.

He goes for his morning run a little later than normal, after his phone call, and thinks about what you had said.

He shouldn’t have agreed to it as quickly as he had, maybe. It should have required more thought, and discussion — better place or time, perhaps. 

He had been so adamantly against it, but this is starting to feel different. It’s more than a few kisses here and there. It’s Bradley enjoying feeling your weight in his arms when he sleeps, and looking forward to your smile when he wakes up.

It’s better, with him. Your first time would be better with him — and he doesn’t even mean that in an overconfident way. He just knows that he and Malcolm are far from the same, and that Malcolm could never treat you the way that Bradley does so naturally.

Bradley decides that he won’t initiate anything other than a discussion on the topic of sex. As much as he does want it, he could go for months without it. And this has to be your call. But, he doesn’t want to know what sparked the idea into your head this morning.

If you ask him again, he already knows that he would do it.

By the time he has finished with your father and with his run, it’s almost time to go. The group of eight of you are spread around the mini-can, bags loaded and waiting for Bradley while Pasquale sits in the front. It’s a really short drive today. Just over an hour to the other side of the city.

“Did anyone else get their assignments back late all the time?” Abigail muses as she lays across the three backseats of the van. You’re sitting a row in front of her, fiddling with your Walkman.

“Even when I was TA’ing, and I’d get my grading in on time, Bradley still gave everyone their results back like a week later.” Robin agrees.

“Yeah, ‘cause he was too busy slipping it to Miss Penny all year.” Luke scoffs without looking up from his chapter on bathhouses, his arms stretched around Robin’s middle as she sits on his lap. 

Instinct almost has you whipping around to look at him. Common sense has you gripped to the spot, staring at the little plastic contraption . You blink furiously at the cassette tape in front of you.

Miss Penny. Who the hell is Miss Penny? Granted, you hadn’t spent too much time wandering the humanities building, but you’re affronted to not be able to picture this mystery woman nonetheless.

“No— Miss Penny? No. Please, like Bradley would ever tell you who he’s screwing.” August — Gus —, the only other guy in your little group of eight, scoffs towards Luke. He’s standing outside of the van, leaning up against the doorframe.

“And if he was making it with anyone, it was for sure Doctor Hayes. Have you seen the two of them talking? — Man, even I felt the tension.” Zoe decides.

Screwing. Slipping it to. Making it.

And now the introduction of Doctor Hayes. 

At least this woman you have heard of; she’s an anthropology professor, and she certainly wasn’t making it with Bradley — she’s happily involved with a woman.

 It was a big point of conversation in your household. The news came to light just before your father was going to make a donation, she visited him personally to ensure that her romantic indiscretions wouldn’t affect his generosity.

If Bradley wasn’t screwing Doctor Hayes, then he probably wasn’t—

“You’re right, they were probably just friends,” Luke shrugs, again without looking up from the book. It should soothe you, but it doesn’t. It’s an arrogant thing, the way he knows everyone’s waiting on his every word, so he doesn’t have to lift his gaze to engage. “Doesn’t change the fact I saw them going at it in his office.”

 When you look up you’re startled by Robin already looking at you, like she just stole the crayon you’ve been waiting for and she’s waiting for your tantrum to begin.

You glance across at Luke instead, who is still staring smugly at his chapter.

They already think that Bradley is screwing you, maybe they’re making it up to get a reaction. 

You muster the calmest look that you can, and flip back a page in your notes, pretending that you’re reviewing the material.

You haven’t ever been to Bradley’s office. There’s a vague understanding of approximately where it is that comes with having spent four years wandering those halls, but in a pinch you would be guessing at exactly where.

 You don’t know what his desk looks like, or if he’s got one of those frosted glass window panes in the door, or maybe it’s just a heavy wood door without a window.

 Some of the old rooms still have those. They’re heavy and creaky and your daddy’s donations are eradicating them one by one.

Those big, heavy, creaky doors would do wonders for someone in need of privacy. As your eyes fall shut to blink, you’re met with a split-second snapshot of Luke nudging it open. 

After hours, after a day of tough lessons. Bradley all stressed with that red flush across his chest that he gets when stuff is really starting to get to him. Miss Penny, in her mysterious shroud of fog… perched against his desk— or worse— bent over it.

You swallow. 

“No you did not.” Abigail declares with a wrinkled face, not believing the dirty little story for a moment.

You would like to not believe it either. 

“Uh-huh. It was when I was TA’ing, I came by to drop off some papers. She was sat on his desk with her back to the door and he was just—“

“Gross, I don’t want to hear about Bradley getting his rocks off with the librarian.” Zoe complains.

The librarian. Miss Penny is the fucking librarian. She has permed hair and cat-eye glasses, a skirt shorter than faculty standard allows too. She made you pay eight dollars in late fees one time. She’s like a decade older than Bradley, maybe fifteen years. 

Your nose wrinkles as you turn your head to peer in the direction of the kitchen. Why her? Why—

“Alright, everybody ready to go?” Bradley has said his long goodbyes to the Gabris family, always wishing he got longer with them, even if Sandro did cockblock him this morning.

He climbs into the passenger seat as an awkward silence fills the van. Everyone takes their seats and stares ahead at him. He turns his head to peer back over his shoulder, frowning in confusion.

“What?”

“Nothing, man,” Luke answers coolly as Robin slides into the seat next to him. “You’re paranoid.”

Another time. Gotta go. You bet he was that casual with Miss Penny, too. With however many other women he might have been with. You set your headphones over your ears and turn toward the window. 

It’s ridiculous, maybe, to be jealous of women that knew Bradley far before you could ever stand to be in the same room as him. But this isn’t jealousy, per se. It’s something else. You don’t doubt that Miss Penny didn’t mean much to him, you just… were hoping that you meant more, maybe. 

The drive is short, and you’re piling into another old, crumbling hotel on the outskirts of Siena as the sun is just starting to set. You follow the crowd into the lobby and Bradley starts his normal routine of collecting the keys.

At first, you’re chatting with Zoe, and nothing feels different. Then, you catch something in your peripheral. Glancing down, your eyes widen and your train of thought ventures away.

“My ring.” You realise, setting your suitcase down on the faded carpet of the lobby. Bradley turns around, and finds you staring at your bare hand. 

“I don’t have my ring.” You haven’t worn that thing since the first day you got there. Bradley has noticed every single day that you haven’t had it. 

“What?” Pasquale frowns, looking between you and your hand.

“My engagement ring!” You snap at him. Everyone, at once, stops to look. Bradley stares at you. “I don’t— I must have left it! We have to go back.”

“Jesus Christ.” Luke scoffs, rolling his eyes as he drops down onto the couch. He figures he could be here a while, while you’re descending into hysterics.

After speaking to your father, Bradley figured he knows why you’re so upset. If you come home without that thing, he would give you the worst lecture known to man, or worse than that, even.

“I’ll call Sandro, and see—“ He takes two steps towards you, his face soft.

“No, I need to get it back. Now. We have to go back.”

“Mr. Bradshaw has a meeting here tomorrow, very early.” Pasquale chips in from beside you.

“I don’t care! I can’t believe I left it— Malcolm’s going to kill me if I tell him I don’t have it. What am I supposed to tell him? — That I took it off?”

You’re not thinking about your father, or getting into trouble with him. Bradley stops moving. You’re thinking about your fiancé. 

Bradley has been comforting you, and singing to you, and kissing you for a week straight — not once thinking that you might one day want to wear that ring again. 

This morning, he had been fooling himself on his run, thinking that this was anything more than fooling around. That he meant anything to you at all. That you understood him. 

He stares at you, finding none of those feelings he had thought you felt this morning. Or last night, or this whole past week.

Nothing but blind panic, because you weren’t smart enough to double check you had everything.

“Didn’t you?” Robin asks.

“Just for a second! I— I — didn’t mean to.” You struggle, eyes wide and fleeting between Bradley and Pasquale.

That’s not true. You took it off because he hurt you. You haven’t worn it in seven days. You didn’t even think about it this morning when you had packed your things, or before that when Bradley had been in your bed.

You’re growing agitated, and so is Bradley. A muscle in his jaw ticks. You meant to take off that ring, and maybe you can’t admit to yourself that you meant to leave it behind. 

“Maybe they could mail it—“ Pasquale tries.

“Do you seriously expect me to go home without it?” You’re looking at Bradley still, like this is his fault somehow. Like he’s the one who took it off of your finger. Your expression turns cold. “That ring is worth more than you make in a year!”

Bradley’s expression flattens. No hurt, no anger. Just pure detachment. He holds his hand out towards Pasquale.

“Give me the keys.”

“But, Bradley, you have—“

“Give me the fucking keys,” Bradley snaps. Zoe flinches at your side, and you feel her looking at you. Pasquale awkwardly drops the keys into Bradley’s open palm. “I’m going to get the ring, if it’ll shut her up.”

Your mouth closes, lips pressing firmly together. 

“I’ll—“

“You stay right there.” Bradley bites. He can’t think of anything worse than being stuck in a van with you for the next two and a half hours. Without looking, he squeezes the keys into his palm and heads for the door. 

With him gone, you’re the only thing for them all to look at. 

None of them knew exactly what was going on between you and Bradley this whole time, but they’re all certain of the same thing now: whatever it was, they all just witnessed the end of it.

tags: @thedroneranger @batdanceq @cassiemitchele @himbos-on-ice @wkndwlff @bradshawsbaby @damrlova @fudge13 @xoxabs88xox @mak-32 @sihtricswife @callsignvenus @callsign-joyride @harper1666 @krismdavis @sheisanangell @cherrycola27 @kmc1989 @sugarcoated-lame @mshistorylover

[keeksandgigz]

Chapter 2: Au coeur des ténèbres

Part 2 of Words are Futile Devices- A Steddie x Reader Call Me By Your Name AU

Summary: As some weird feelings come to light, you begin questioning your initial opinion of your two guests

cw: some suggestive content, reader's vivid smutty imagination. reader is a bit less of a cunt, brief description of insecurities (nothing too detailed), slut shaming if you squint, kissing, a lot of internal angst, overall a lot of words I'm sorry

word count: 3k

author's notes: I'm so sorry for the wait, but its here!!!

Heart of Darkness laid in your lap as you sat in your father’s study. Eddie typed away at his desk, while Steve looked at some old archeology dissertations from past students. You were often forced to sit in and listen to the guest’s nonsensical jumble of words and phrases in an attempt to sound smart. 

You had been scolded by your father twice for trying to interact with Eddie, who seemed laser- focused on the parchment in front of him, the metallic clicking of the keys of the typewriter in the faint background of the stuffy old study. Giovanna had come by twice with a pitcher full of apricot juice from the garden, which the two had gulped down without giving much thought. You saw the way the juice dribbled down Eddie’s chin, how he lifted his thumb to clean off the mess, then wiped his finger on his black cutoff shirt and proceeded to continue typing. His fingers flexed and tensed in between typing, thick and sturdy as he stretched and massaged the palm of his hand with his ringed fingers. 

Steve sat on the dark green couch, legs spread, his shorts riding up, up, up bunching at the crease between his thighs and his groin. One of his legs bounced as he reviewed case studies, artifact pictures, lip trapped in between his pearly teeth. 

There wasn’t a whisper of a breeze, or a draft, but you shivered nonetheless. The two could’ve been patronizing and condescending, but that didn’t take away from the fact that you saw the way their skin, not yet tan from the sunlight, rippled with sweat at each whisper of a movement in the stuffy study. Steve’s leg bounced as he studied the pictures projected on the walls, his already short shorts riding up with each jump of his leg, exposing more and more of his thigh, you blushed. 

This charged silence broke once Steve opened his mouth. He held up another glass full of apricot juice. 

“What’s apricot in Italian again?” he asked, wiping remnants of juice from his chin. 

“Albicocca” your father said, smiling. He went on a rant about the etymology of the word, which you really couldn’t care about. A fun little rehearsed bit he did every year, the students’ impressed faces beamed up the stuffy study. 

“If I can beg your pardon, what you said is slightly wrong” it was Eddie. Surprise tinged your face in hearing him speak up. In the two days that you’ve known him his vocabulary was littered with grateful praises and quiet musings, here it had a slight tinge of pride. 

“It’s uh— actually the Greek etymology for apricot comes from Latin. It’s praecoquum, then praecox, then precokia and then we get the Arab al- barquq— albicocca” he mused in a butchered italian, but all you could hear in his observations is just cock, cock, cock. He sounded nervous delivering his lecture, almost as if he was scared of getting kicked out for defying an authority of mind like your father.

Instead, he looked at him with an impressed smile, and Eddie blushed a bit. Steve delivered a friendly pat on the boy’s shoulder.

Not as lucky as many. 

Later that day, when Steve stole your friends for a volleyball game on your lawn, you watched his sweaty body, clad in a blue swimsuit, shoulders flexing and shining in the early afternoon sunlight jump up and duck down along with the worn ball that keeps jumping between both sides of the net. 

Eddie sat on the lawn, in the shade. His pearly complexion having acquired just the most undetectable sheen of red that threw the boy in a panicked frenzy earlier that morning. He was sorting through loose pages of what appears to be his manuscript. 

“Why aren’t you playing instead of staring at me?” his head perked up from the typed up pages, and you could feel yourself heat up. Not even the sun could hide the tinge of pink that colored your cheeks. 

“I could say the same thing about you” you stammered out, snippy and embarrassed. 

All he could do was chuckle as he motioned his papers towards the book you had ignored sitting in your lap. “I like that book. Heart of Darkness? One of the few books I actually liked when I was in English Lit in high school” he smiled. A smile that seemed genuine, much different than the courteous smiles he had reserved for your mom and dad. 

“And that was when the dinosaurs still roamed the Earth?” you curled your nose. 

A sardonic laugh escaped the boy. 

“Very funny. And how old are you again?” he scooted his butt closer to you, his loose papers now forgotten on the lawn. The proximity made you a bit nervous. 

“Twnety-one” you breathed out “I wouldn’t give you any less than fifty- six” you nudged his shoulder and he laughed. 

“Shouldn’t you be at some snooty college party right now? I dunno, traveling the world with some sorority sister?”

“And miss this gorgeous sight to behold?” your tone dripped of sarcasm as you pointed at Steve, mid jump into grabbing the ball.

Right as you said that Steve missed, ending up on the grass, a pained moan followed. Eddie isn’t given any time to answer you, stopping in his tracks and to run and pick up his friend to escort him where you were. You couldn’t care less about the physical ineptitude of your guest— if there wasn’t any blood or bones sticking out it wasn’t worth worrying. 

“Pass me some water, please?” asked Eddie.. You complied, rolling your eyes as he began kneading the injured boy’s shoulder. He hissed at the first swipes of the long- haired boy’s hands— big and firm. You let down a short swallow. 

“Steve you’re tight— you stressed?” Eddie asked, squeezing the juncture between the boy’s neck and shoulder. 

“I’m fine Ed” he smiled up at the boy, but instead of moving, Eddie dug his fingers deeper into the golden flesh of the honey- eyed boy. 

“Here, feel” he grabbed your hand and placed it on Steve’s warm shoulder— firm and freckled, still wet with sweat. “Isn’t he a bit tight?” Much to your shock you retreated your hand, but the feeling of the smoothness of his tan skin seemed to be encased in the fiber of the palm of your hand. 

“Yeah, I guess” you muttered, going back to Heart of Darkness. 

Dissatisfied with your curt and cold response, Eddie had your friend Chiara feel the back of the injured boy, whose fingers seemed to linger along Steve’s back for long, almost mapping every mole and mark to store in her mind for later. She was an artist, and an artist’s eye was never wrong. 

Steve smiled at the girl, and in return she giggled. Once she left you closed the book in your lap once again. 

“Careful, she’s gonna try to draw you naked” you teased Steve, whose eyes seemed to be glued on the way your friend scampered around the lawn. 

“Like I’m complaining” he retorted with a cheeky smile, and that made you feel weird. 

What did she have that you didn’t? Why didn’t he look at you like that?

You cursed the way you seemed to act too much like a grown up, the way you took yourself too seriously to even participate in a dumb volleyball game. 

Maybe you should’ve played. 

Taking your towel and your book with you, you made your way back into the house, almost stomping in protest, at the way the honey- eyed boy didn’t seem to spare you a cheeky smile or a wandering eye. Didn’t matter that they both seemed like two idiots who only cared about getting the experience from your father’s expertise, exploiting and squeezing the knowledge out of the overripe peach of his brain, which seemed to become less and less awake with every year that passed. 

You disliked the way that Steve seemed to want to make a pass at each and every one of your friends, and them letting him. With his rude and pushy American ways of wanting to make everything his, his property, his Don John-ish manners that made him expect something from everyone he came into contact with. 

You hated Eddie’s arrogance in his surveying and picking your brain, making the six year difference between you two seem like a chasm, with his snobbish knowledge of literally every book that sat on your bookcase. Fingers rubbing his stubbly, boyish chin as he examined each and every shelf, spine, title. He always seemed to have something to say with you, wanting to prove himself to the whole world, confirm that he wasn’t just some trailer trash who had finally made it out of the few acres of overpopulated land. You could not remotely fathom how those two were so close together, coming from such different backgrounds. 

However, as you tried to silently beg for Steve and Eddie’s attention, that was seemingly anywhere else but on you, like an old, neglected dog, you seemed to realize that, in some twisted sort of way, you wanted to fall victim to their charm. 

Like many of your friends did, much bolder, some older, and more confident than you had been, in the past years, not hesitating to pounce on your guests with hunger similar to a hyena. The hunger of a repressed teenage girl who had just reached adulthood, craving everything that came with it– even risque summer romances with men who had traveled around the sun for much longer than they had. Throwing their plump, glowing bodies on the dance floor around the sturdy necks of your father’s students. With every year that passed, you could not escape the vicious circle of your giggling friends, who competed over who would get to lure your guests into their greedy grasp first, and you’d all hear about it the morning after. 

You’d heard about gorgeous but incredibly incapable men, well- endowed, but short, much older and more experienced. There was something about their stories, the lightheartedness in their laughs, as if playing with these men’s hearts and minds had become a game, that made you feel like a different person. Coming home and contemplating on leaving the communicating bathroom door open, so that your guest could catch you sleeping on your stomach without any shorts on, or adjusting your swimsuit at the pool right as they passed by to read on the lawn. You never brought yourself to act upon these contemplations, too scared of what your father might have thought of you, and rather, delighting yourself in tormenting your guests as a way to cope with a feeling of inadequacy that seemed to swell with each year that passed.

Ever since Steve and Eddie had arrived– young, attractive, and most peculiar thing of all, there were two of them– your friends could not stop arguing about which boy would have fallen in the arms of your friends. Anna had gushed about seeing Steve’s dick through his tiny, blue swimming shorts earlier that day during a game of volleyball, escalating into a conversation that hours later could not seem to leave your mind, as you sat on one of the lawn chairs of the balcony. 

You had not entered your room, afraid your restlessness might have woken the two boys. Nursing a cigarette in between the intrusive thoughts of whether Anna was right. Had she already claimed her prize? A part of you stung at the thought that not even four days into their stay, your friends had already gotten their slimy hands on your guests. A different part had wanted it to be you to have received such attention from the honey- eyed boy. Would he have been attentive and careful? Or full of passion and bravado, much like how he’d presented himself to you since he’d arrived? 

“This seat taken?” Steve had startled you. The irony. 

You heard him let out a whiff of air, like a muted laugh “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.” He sat down on the wicker chair next to you, without waiting for your permission. He took in the still night air that had oftentimes brought you counsel, accompanied by the melody of the night cicadas. 

“Can’t sleep?” he mused, playing with the woven wicker on the arm of the chair. 

“Didn’t wanna wake you guys up” Your dry response was accompanied by a lazy drag off the half- finished cigarette. Steve reached an arm out in your direction, you took the hint. 

“I was downstairs finishing some work for your dad, the jet lag still keeps me up” you watched his lips wrap around the cigarettes, right where your mouth had been just seconds before. Your breath hitched at the realization as he let out the smoke from his mouth, slow and deliberate. 

“So, uh, you and Anna? I heard you guys had a thing going on” you passed him the ashtray on the small table next to you as he shook the ash off the cigarette and brought it back to his mouth. 

He shook his head, “She’s your friend?” he asked, sardonically, turning away from you to look into the distant trees. 

“Not really, rumors travel fast around here” you tried to keep your mouth shut, but something inside you just pushed you to intervene, to let him know that she was certainly not good for him. “And she also has a reputation,” you added, gulping. 

He put out the cigarette in the ashtray, fixing his glasses on the bridge of his nose and sat back on the wicker seat “Is that so?” A smirk adorned his face, almost as if he didn’t believe a word you were saying. 

You nodded, heating up a bit at the way his legs spread and his shorts rode up his legs “She gets around” You avoided his gaze, looking at Giovanna downstairs in the garden, finishing up her last chores for the night. 

“Never stopped me before” he retorted, shrugging. The sour look on your face only made his sly smile slice his face further. 

“By the way your nose is curled up I’d say you’re jealous” he laughed, standing up. You heated up at the– very correct and very obvious– observation. 

“I am not” you retorted, maybe a little bit more upset than you should’ve been at his dig, standing up abruptly.

“What is it then?” he inched closer to you. You could smell the remnants of the cigarette on his breath. You felt your eyes widen and your throat close up “You’re envious of your friends getting more attention than you? Am I supposed to feel bad for you because you feel inferior to them? Maybe if you stopped being a bitch to everyone that crossed your path you’d get laid too” With each stinging sentence the boy got closer and closer to you, his chest almost touching yours, and with each dig you swelled up with anger. Why was he treating you like this all of a sudden? 

Deserved? Sure. You had been nothing but a raging cunt to him since his arrival, but his words seemed to intend to cut deeper than that. 

However, instead of hurting you, his words only revved you even further, wanting most of all, to shut up his nonsensical attack against you. 

You watched his heated expression as he stopped his ranting, leaning on the railing of your balcony. 

“Well? Nothing to say for yourself?” he muttered, his voice much lower than his previous scolding. You couldn’t say anything, inside you were fighting demons you had only heard of from your friends. You were panting as if you had run a marathon, but to him, you were just a child throwing a tantrum. 

He scoffed “Y’know what? Grow up” he laughed, before motioning to turn around. Something in your chest pulled you towards him. The need to become more like your friends, that had lied dormant as you had awaited to provocatively lure your guests into your room, had been nudged. 

As Steve walked away heatedly, closing the door to his room, you imagined grabbing his shoulder with strength you didn’t know you had and spin him around before crashing his lips onto his. 

Kissing him with a hunger that was only for you to satiate. Needing to feel yourself bloom out of a cage that you’d put yourself in because you took yourself too seriously. You imagined exploring his sturdy, tanned body. 

As you got ready for bed, peeking your face into your guests’ room, where Steve had fallen asleep without changing out of his clothes. You imagined slipping your hands under his billowy shirt, as his hands gripped your waist so tightly that his fingers could have left marks in their wake. Slipping beneath the fabric of your shirt, feel the softness of the skin underneath, scratching it with his fingernails. 

You thought about intentionally upsetting him, just to have him that close to you again. You thought about his reaction to your tongue making its way into his mouth, licking and tasting his lips, his gums, his tongue. Wanting him to have access to you, to look at you. To peek his head into your room to find you asleep on your stomach, wanting him to see your scrunched up face as you transcribed your music, leaning against a tree as you read. Swimming with your friends, but only staring at you, at the way the water would drip off your body, at the way you would look while suntanning. 

A devious thought pervaded you as you imagined both of your guests fighting to have you. Fighting to look at you. Fighting for your attention. 

You laid in bed, drunk on the vivid images of your body undulating in between the two boys, heated and needy like you’d never been before.

Thank you for reading!! Feedback is much appreciated <3

tagging: @littlexdeaths, @strangerstilinski, @aphrogeneias, @usergeta, @rebelfell, @ali-r3n, @thornsnvultures , @jamdoughnutmagician , @take-everything-you-can, @aol19 , @eddiesghxst , @myspacebrat , @xxbimbobunnyxx , @cryingglightningg , @lavendermunson , @freak-of-hawkins , @eddiesdaydream , @sidereustales

[the-mortuary-witch]

HERB AND FLORA PROPERTIES

A

ACACIA: exorcism, banishing, money, love, to be burned for alter offering, aiding in psychic powers, meditation, and protection.

ACORN: strength, money and wealth, and protection.

ADAM’S AND EVES ROOTS: (TOXIC) attract love and happiness.

ADDERS TONGUE: healing and divination.

AFRICAN VIOLET: protection and promote spirituality.

AGARIC: (TOXIC) encourage fertility.

AGRIMONY: protection, banish negative energy-entities, reverse spells, break hexes, promotes sleep, psychic protection, and returns spells to their senders.

AGUE ROOT: protection and break hexes.

ALDER: whistles entice the elemental earth, water magic, and strength.

ALFALFA: abundance, prosperity, money, anti-hunger, frugality, and providence. Place in the kitchen.

ALKANET: repel negativity, attract prosperity, and purification all heal-mental powers.

ALLSPICE: money, luck, healing, prosperity when burned, courage, magickal power, love, and lust.

ALMOND: prosperity, success in business ventures, money, wisdom, love, and anger management.

ALOE: protection, luck, money, repel evil, healing, beauty, success, and peace.                           

ALOESWOOD: love, spirituality, money, protection.

ALTHEA: protection, psychic power, and attract good spirits.

ALYSSUM: protection and to calm anger.

AMARANTH: healing, protection, healing heartbreak, and invisibility.

AMBER: healing.                                       

AMBERGRIS: lust and sex.

ANEMONE: health, protection, and healing. 

ANGELICA: protection, exorcism, remove curses and hexes, healing, visions, wards off negativity when sprinkled around the house, increases life energy bringing warmth of Fire element, and wards off negativity when sprinkled around the house.                          

ANISE: divination, psychic awareness, joy, dreams, luck, love, enthusiasm, Winter Solstice, and entices the spirits to aid in spells.

APPLE: love, healing, garden blessing, buried in the garden on Samhain as food for the departing spirits, to be shared with one you love,  immortality, happiness, luck, broken heart, spirit food, and the goddess.

APRICOT: love. 

ARABIC GUM: purification, spirituality, and protection. 

ARBUTUS: exorcism and protection. 

ARROWROOT: protection. 

ASAFETIDA: purification, protection, and exorcism. 

ASH: Prosperity, protection, healing, love, wands, leaves for prophetic dreams, sea rituals, longevity, peace, luck, purification, study, enhances magic, and besom.

ASPEN: protection, eloquence, and anti-theft. 

ASTER: love.                     

ASTRAGALUS: fortification, and strength. 

AVENS: exorcism, love, and purification. 

AVOCADO: beauty, love, and lust. 

B

BACHELORS BUTTONS: love.

BALM OF GILEAD: (TOXIC) love, manifestations, ease a broken heart, protection, and healing.

BAMBOO: protection, luck, break hexes, and wishes.

BANANA: prosperity, fertility, and potency.

BANYAN: luck and happiness.

BARLEY: healing, protection, and love.

BASIL: exorcism, love, protection, prosperity, wealth, repels negative energy, sympathy, wealth, flying, courage, business, fertility, healing relationships, and ensure faithfulness on masses.

BAY: psychic powers, protection, healing, purification, strength, wish magick, wisdom, good luck, fertility, banish negativity, energy, insight, divination, victory, prosperity, employment, mental power, and burn for psychic powers.

BAYBERRY: employment.

BEAN: love, protection, exorcism, wart charming, reconciliation, and potency.

BEECH: creativity, wishes, fertility, and balance mental health.

BEET: love.

BELLADONNA: (TOXIC) visions, astral protection, and divination.

BENZOIN: purification, prosperity, astral projection, confidence, and protection. 

BERGAMOT: success, money, confidence, protection, prosperity, employment, and unwanted advances.

BE-STILL: (TOXIC) luck.

BETONY: love, healing, burn at Litha for purification, protection; place under pillow to be rid of nightmares; sprinkle around doors to ward off despair, and psychic awareness.

BIRCH: purification, protection, exorcism, cleansing, beauty, catalyst, blessing, health, besom, and beginnings.

BISTORT: fertility and psychic powers.

BITTERSWEET: (TOXIC) protection, healing, and broken heart.

BLACK COHOSH: courage, love, protection, and potency.

BLACK HELLEBORE: (TOXIC) invisibility, exorcism, and astral projection.

BLACK PEPPER: courage and protection.

BLACK SNAKEROOT: love, lust, and money.

BLACKBERRY: healing, protection, prosperity, money, and pies for Lughnassadh.

BLACKTHORN: returns evil to its sender.

BLADDERWRACK: psychic powers, protection, money, water or sea spells, wind spells, travel, and psychic clarity.

BLEEDING HEARTS: (TOXIC) love.

BLESSED THISTLE: protection, animal healing, and abundance.

BLOODROOT: (TOXIC) love, purification, and protection.

BLUEBELL: luck and truth.

BLUEBERRY: protection.

BLUE COHOSH ROOT: courage, balance, and protection.

BLUE FLAG: (TOXIC) money, wealth, and success in business.

BODHI: wisdom, fertility, protection, and meditation.

BONESET: protection and exorcism.

BORAGE: courage, psychic powers, and carry leaves for protection.

BRACKEN: protection, healing, fertility, prophetic dreams, and rune magick.

BRAZIL NUT: love.

BRIAR: add to tea for clairvoyant dreams and protection.

BRIONY: (TOXIC) mage magick, protection, and money.

BROMELIAD: protection and money.

BROOM: (TOXIC) divination, wind spells, purification of the circle, and hung indoors for protection.

BRYONY: (TOXIC) pleasure and reveal secrets.

BUCHU: prophetic dreams and psychic powers.

BUCKEYE: luck, divination, money, wealth, prosperity, and gambling.

BUCKTHORN: protection, exorcism, wishes, and legal matters.

BUCKWHEAT: protection and money.

BURDOCK: protection, healing, wards off negativity, purifies, protects (washing floors or dried root on red string around the neck), happy home, clears space & holds the space safe, and spirit of north.

C

CABBAGE: luck.

CACTUS: protection and chastity.

CALAMUS: (TOXIC) luck, protection, healing, money, and purification.

CALENDULA: stress management , opening to the 3rd Chakra, and helps energy move outward from centre of body extending in all directions.

CAMELLIA: prosperity, wealth, and luxury.

CAMPHOR: (TOXIC) healing, divination, chastity, past lives, prophetic dreams, purification, psychic awareness, and unwanted advances.

CAPER: lust, love, and potency.

CARAWAY: protection, lust, healing, mental powers, repel negativity, psychic healing, vitality, energy, magickal power, and anti-theft.

CARDAMON: lust, love, and burned in love spells and in love sachets.

CARNATION: protection, strength, healing, altar offering to the goddess, strength.

CAROB: protection and health.

CARROT: fertility, lust, vision, and the God aspect.

CASCARA SAGRADA: protection, money, and legal matters.

CASHEW: prosperity, money, and communication.

CASSIA: psychic awareness, and spirituality.

CASTOR: (TOXIC) protection and repel negativity.

CATNIP: love, beauty, happiness, power, courage, positive cat magick, friendship, joy, anger management, depression management, and familiars.

CAT TAIL: lust.

CAYENNE: exorcism and healing.

CEDAR: healing, purification, money, protection, cleansing, courage, stopping sexual harassment, prosperity, aura field, and space.

CELANDINE: joy, protection, happiness, escape, legal matters, and depression management.

CELERY: lust, psychic powers, mental clarity, concentration, and peace.

CENTAURY: snake removing.

CHAMOMILE: purification, tranquility, money, sleep-rest (tea), love, luck, meditation, prosperity, incense for the God, gambling, hex breaking, legal matters, peace, dreams, dexterity, and protection.

CHAPPARAL: Fire element rituals, protection, and Spirit of South.

CHERRY: love, divination, burn chips at sabbats, creativity, and victory.

CHESTNUT: love.

CHICKWEED: love and fidelity.

CHICORY: favours, frugality, remove obstacles, invisibility, frigidity, and liberation.

CHILI PEPPER: fidelity, love, and break hexes.

CHINA BERRY: (TOXIC) luck and change.

CHRYSANTHEMUM: (TOXIC) protection.

CILANTRO: health.

CINCHONA: protection and luck.

CINNAMON: prosperity, success, spirituality, healing, lust, protection, love, psychic powers, passion, power, dreams, strength, astral projection, courage, money, purification, and personal empowerment.

CINQUEFOIL: money, protection, sleep, prophetic dreams, purification, lust, prosperity, and divination dreams.

CITRON: healing and eaten to increase psychic powers.

CIVET: love, lust, and sex.

CLOTH-OF-GOLD: animal communication.

CLOVE: protection, exorcism, purification, love, money, mental clarity, burn for wealth, wards off negativity, counter spells, cleansing, divination, luck, depression management, psychic awareness, prophetic dreams, happiness, and gossip.

CLOVER: success, protection, money, exorcism, love, fidelity, consecration, beauty, luck, youth, healing, faeries, and prosperity.

CLUB MOSS: protection and power.

COCONUT: purification, protection, chastity, and water.

COHOSH (BLACK): courage, protection, potency, and menopause.

COLTSFOOT: love, psychic visions, healing, wealth, and prosperity.

COLUMBINE: courage and love.

COMFREY: (TOXIC) money, root or leaves for healing, carry for safe travel, protection, stress management, safe journeys (Worldly or through Meditation), and Winter Solstice.

COPAL: love, purification, exorcism, protection, spirituality, earth element, sets sacred space, and allows guides and guidance to come.

CORIANDER: love, health, healing, protection, and longevity.

CORN: divination, protection, luck, and money.

CORNFLOWER: psychism.

CORNSILK: Water element and stimulates flow.

COTTON: luck, healing, and protection.

COWSLIP: youth, healing, treasure finding, luck, love, and psychic dreams.

CROCUS: love, visions, and wisdom.

CUBEB: love.

CUCKOO-FLOWER: love and fertility.

CUCUMBER: healing, fertility, and chastity.

CUMIN: exorcism, protection, prevents theft, fidelity, and love.

CURRY: protection and exorcism.

CYCLAMEN: fertility, protection, happiness, lust, and broken heart.

CYPRESS: healing, protection, comfort, longevity, peace, sleep, and liberation.

D

DAFFODIL: love, luck, and fertility.

DAISY: love, lust, luck, depression management, faeries and elves, and happiness.

DAMIANA: divination, love, lust, sex magick, dreams, visions, psychic powers, and opens door between worlds.

DANDELION LEAF AND ROOT: purification, divination, wishes, and calling spirits.

DATE PALM: potency and fertility.

DATURA: (TOXIC) protection, sleep, and break hexes.

DEERS TONGUE: (TOXIC) lust, psychic powers, and gossip management.

DEVIL’S BIT: love, protection, luck, and exorcism.

DEVIL’S SHOESTRING: protection, luck, gambling, power, and employment.

DILL:  love, lust, seeds draw money, leaves for protection, and flowers for love.

DITTANY OF CRETE: manifestations and astral projection.

DOCK: money, healing, and fertility.

DODDER: love divination and knot magick.

DOGBANE: love.

DOGWOOD: protection and wishes.

DONG QUAI: health, vitality, and fire element rituals.

DRAGONS BLOOD: power, protection, exorcism, potency, love, courage, fortune, catalyst, magick power, strength, purification, stimulates action of other herbs in incense blend, and stimulates movement of energy.

DULSE: harmony and lust.

DUTCHMAN’S BREECHES: love.

E

EBONY: protection and power.

ECHINACEA: strengthening spells, health, strength, and wards off negativity or undesirable energies.

EDELWEISS: invisibility and bullet-proofing.

ELDER: (CAUTION: SEEDS ARE TOXIC)  money, wishes, theft protection, exorcism, healing, prosperity, sleep, wards negative thoughts when used as wind chimes, blessings, do not burn the wood of elder for it is sacred to Hecate, see fairies in the trees at Litha, flowers used as an alter offering, berries for esbat wine, flowers added to candle spells directed at Hecate during the new moon, cleansing, and offering.

ELDERBERRIES: prosperity, protection, sleep, joy, visions, banishing, energy, ancient wisdom, contact with elementals, and invoke magic.

ELDERFLOWER: purifying and healing.

ELECAMPANE: love, protection, psychic powers, and anger management.

ELM: protection, love, and attracts elves.

ENDIVE: love and lust.

ERYNGO: peace, love, lust, and traveler's luck.

EUCALYPTUS: (TOXIC) healing, protection, joy, purification, and air element rituals.

EUPHORBIA: (TOXIC) protection and purification.

EYEBRIGHT: joy, psychic powers, mental clarity, mental ability and clarity, and visions.

F

FALSE UNICORN ROOT: connection to magical realm, and contains energy and intention.

FENNEL: protection, exorcism, healing, purification, virility, sacred to the God, hung over doors at Litha, strength, courage, and money.

FENNEL SEED: stimulates movement.

FENUGREEK: prosperity, wealth, money, mental powers, and clearing.

FERN: (TOXIC) money, wealth, eternal youth, protection, outside for rain, luck, riches, health, and exorcism.

FEVERFEW: protection, wards sickness, and wards accidents in traffic.

FIG: divination, fertility, and love.

FIGWORT: protection and health.

FIR: health, prosperity, and birth and rebirth.

FLAX: luck, money, protection, purification, beauty, psychic powers, healing, health, and initiates flow.

FLEABANE: exorcism, protection, and chastity.

FORGET-ME-NOT: mental powers.

FOXGLOVE: (TOXIC) faeries and elves, lust, and grow in garden for protection of the house and yard.

FRAGRANT BEDSTRAW: love.

FRANKINCENSE: exorcism, purification, protection, spirituality, power, meditation, blessing, concentration, banishing, courage, divination, healing, love, purification, consecration, sets sacred space, sets safe space for guides to come in, and spirit of East or North.

FUMITORY: money and exorcism.

FURZ/EGORSE: burn at Ostara for protection and as a preparation for any conflict.

FUZZY WEED: love and hunting.

G

GALANGAL: protection, legal matters, lust, health, money, psychic powers, break hexes, energy, strength, and courage.

GARDENIA: love, peace, healing, spirituality, and psychic awareness.

GARLIC: protection, healing, health, exorcism, lust sacred to Hecate, flowers for altar offerings, cloves for protection, anti-theft, wishes, and relief from nightmares.

GENTIAN: power, love, break hexes, wishes, and theft.

GERANIUM: (TOXIC) courage, abundance, health, love, protection, and fertility.

GIANT VETCH: fidelity.

GINGER love, money, success, power, aphrodisiac, psychic ability, apathy, lust, good health, magickal power, fire element rituals, brings into existence, bringer of the manifestation, 3rd chakra vitality, inner strength, stimulates flow of energy, and spirit of south.

GINSENG: longevity, sexual potency, protection, healing, love, lust, wishes, beauty, vitality, fertility, desire, encourages a long lasting affect, and strength.

GOAT’S RUE: healing and health.

GOLDENROD: prosperity, money, divination, and luck.

GOLDENSEAL: money and healing.

GORSE: protection and money.

GOTU KOLA: meditation.

GOURD: protection.

GRAIN: protection.

GRAINS OF PARADISE: love, lust, luck, money, and wishes.

GRAPE: mental clarity, money, fertility, garden magick, and happiness.

GRASS: psychic powers and protection.

GROUND IVY: divination.

GROUNDSEL: health and healing.

GUM MASTIC: magickal power.

H

HAWTHORN: happiness, fertility, powerful wands, protection, chastity, fishing magick, faeries and elves, purification, business, depression management, purity, and cleansing.

HAWTHORNE BERRIES: 4th chakra strength and vitality, love, and contentment.

HAZEL: luck, fertility, protection, wishes, nuts strung on cord in house or ritual room to invite the help of plant fairies, used for wands, healing, anti-lightning, love, aphrodisiac, wisdom, divination, mental powers, intelligence, and inspiration.

HEATHER: luck, protection, red to start or end an affair, white for protection, purple for spiritual development, use at Samhain to invite spirits to visit, rain making, and spirituality.

HELIOTROPE: (TOXIC) exorcism, prophetic dreams, healing, wealth, invisibility, money, spirituality, prosperity, and psychic awareness.

HELLEBORE (BLACK): (TOXIC) protection.

HEMLOCK: (TOXIC) astral projection, diminish libido, power, purification, charging, and alignment.

HEMP: healing, love, visions, and meditation.

HENBANE: (TOXIC) love, luck, divination, and invisibility.

HENNA: healing, health, love, change, and dying material.

HIBISCUS: love, lust, divination, and 5th chakra.

HICKORY: legal matters.

HIGH JOHN THE CONQUEROR: (TOXIC) strength, confidence, health, love, money, success, happiness, break hexes, increase strength, legal matters, anointing, and victory.

HOLY THISTLE: purification and break hexes.

HOLLY: protection, luck, dream magic, anti-lightning, balance, dreams, enhances magic, holiness, consecration, and beauty.

HONESTLY: money and protection.

HONEYSUCKLE: protection, money, psychic powers, confidence, broken heart, luck, happiness, healing, and depression management.

HOPS: healing, sleep, stress management, and opens the channel in and out of the body in relationship with the universe.

HOREHOUND: exorcism, healing, purification, protection, mental clarity, balance, banishing, and opens air element within body and in the world, opens channel for clear communication.

HORSE CHESTNUT: (TOXIC) healing and money.

HORSERADISH: exorcism and purification.

HORSETAIL: fertility.

HOUSELEEK: love, luck, and protection.

HUCKLEBERRY: protection, luck, dream magic, and break hexes.

HYACINTH: (TOXIC) business, court cases, sleep, depression management, love, protection, and happiness.

HYDRANGEA: break hexes.

HYSSOP: healing, protection, purification, wards negativity, prosperity, money, banishing, and dragon energy.

I

INDIAN PAINT BRUSH: love.

IRIS: purification, wisdom, courage, reincarnation, spirituality, and happiness.

IRISH MOSS: luck, money, protection, opens throat, and opens channel for clear communication.

IVY: (TOXIC) divination, protection, healing, fertility, love, and fidelity.

J

JASMINE: divination, love, money, prophetic dreams, sleep, prosperity, spirituality, visions, confidence, broken heart, astral projection, business, and court cases.

JIMSON WEED: protect against evil spirits.

JOB’S TEARS: luck, wishes, and healing.

JOE-PYE WEED: love and respect.

JUNIPER: protection, love, exorcism, health, anti-theft, banishing, peace, wishes, aphrodisiacs, sets sacred space, and spirit of north.

K

KAVA KAVA: lust, protection while traveling, astral projection, visions, luck, visions, protection, love, and opens one to receiving guidance and guides.

KELP: wind spells, psychic powers, protection, connection to divine source through the physical and spiritual, unity, life-force strengthening, and spirit of centre.

KNOTWEED: health, binding spells, and protection

L

LADY’S MANTLE: love and self control.

LADY’S SLIPPER: protection.

LARCH: protection and anti-theft.

LARKSPUR: protection and health.

LAVENDER: protection, call in good spirits, love, sleep, longevity, happiness, peace, healing, burn for purification, peace, use in bath for purification, burn at Litha as an offering, psychic awareness, chastity, liberation, menopause, childbirth, grief or loss, youthful vigour, stress management, travel, anger management, and attracts elves.

LEEK: exorcism, love, and protection.

LEMON: purification, love, friendship, longevity, cleansing, healing, peace, success, broken heart, anger management, and devotion.

LEMON BALM: love, success, healing, depression management, aphrodisiac, and soothes emotional pain after relationship ends.

LEMON VERBENA: protection, purification, love, power, beauty, youth, happiness, peace, mental and emotional balance, and Summer Solstice.

LEMONGRASS: psychic powers, mental clarity, lust, and repels snakes.

LETTUCE: love divination, sleep, protection, chastity, and luck.

LIQUORICE: love, lust, fidelity, aphrodisiac, meditation, and harmony.

LIFE-EVERLASTING: health, healing, and longevity.

LILAC: exorcism, protection, purification, beauty, love, peace, and psychic awareness.

LILY: protection, exorcism, repel negativity, truth, break love spells, strength, purification, and breaking hexes.

LILY OF THE VALLEY: (TOXIC) mental clarity, happiness, insight, depression management, and peace.

LIME: healing, love, protection, cleansing, happiness, and purification.

LINDEN: healing, protection, luck, love, sleep, bark for protection, leaves and flowers for immortality, good fortune, youth, attraction, and longevity.

LIQUID AMBER: protection.

LIVERWORT: love and protection.

LOBELIA: (TOXIC) healing and love.

LOOSESTRIFE: peace, protection, harmony, and purple restores harmony and brings peace.

LOTUS: protection, spirituality, love, lock opening, liberation, and mental powers.

LOVAGE: love, attraction, cleansing, and purification.

LOVE SEED: love and friendship.

LUCKY HAND: protection, luck, money, travel, and employment.

M

MACE: psychic powers, mental clarity, and divination. 

MAGUEY: lust. 

MAGNOLIA: fidelity, past lives, peace, sex, broken heart, beauty, and wisdom. 

MAHOGANY: anti-lightning. 

MADIENHAIR: beauty and love. 

MALE FERN: luck and love. 

MALLOW: love, protection, and exorcism. 

MANDRAKE: (TOXIC) potency, exorcism, protection, fertility, money, love, health, protection, catalyst, prosperity, divination, increase psychic powers, aphrodisiacs, cursing enemies, building, banishing, and protection in the subconscious, unconscious and underworld. 

MAPLE: money, longevity, and love. 

MARIGOLD: prophetic dreams, protection, legal matters, marriage spells, enhanced psychic powers, pick in full sun, business and legal matters, clairvoyant dreams, and mixed with water and rubbed on the eyelids to see fairies. 

MARJORAM: protection, love, happiness, health, money, depression management, and prosperity. 

MARSHMALLOW: healing, friendship, boundaries, love, protection, strength, and emotional balance. 

MASTERWORT: protection, strength, and courage.  

MASTIC: psychic powers, lust, manifestations, love, and magick power. 

MAY APPLE: (TOXIC) money and prosperity. 

MEADOW RUE: love and divination. 

MEADOWSWEET: love, divination, peace, happiness, harmony, and 3rd chakra. 

MESQUITE: healing. 

MILK THISTLE: creativity, protection, dispel, and transformation. 

MIMOSA: love, protection, prophetic dreams, purification, past lives, and visions. 

MINT: exorcism, protection, money, lust, healing, travel, alter offering for helpful spirits , love, luck, anger management, dreams, abundance, prosperity, and rejuvenation. 

MISTLETOE: (TOXIC) Healing, protection, love, fertility, health, exorcism, hunting, success, catalyst, lust, liberation, and sexual potency. 

MOLUKKA: protection. 

MOONFLOWER: liberation. 

MOONWORT: love, money, and divination. 

MORNING GLORY: (TOXIC) peace, happiness, and depression management. 

MOSS: luck and money. 

MOTHERWORT: balances within, self empowerment, and 2nd chakra. 

MUGWORT: astral projection, strength, psychic powers, protection, prophetic dreams, healing, divination, rub fresh herb on crystal balls and magick mirrors to increase their strength, pick on full moon night, clairvoyance, purification, sex, renewal, fertility, clearing, sleep, visions, opens one to the teachings of the subconscious and unconscious self, and 6th and 7th chakras. 

MULBERRY: protection and strength. 

MULLEIN: exorcism, health, protection, courage, love divination, calling spirits, dreams, and opens life energy flow through the body. 

MUSK: purification and sex. 

MUSTARD: fertility, protection, mental clarity, health, and money. 

MYRRH: spirituality, purification, protection, healing, exorcism, wards negativity, burn for purification and consecrations, banishing, sets sacred space, and ancient wisdom. 

MYRTLE: peace, money, love, youth, fertility, sleep, healing, and prosperity. 

N

NARCISSUS: peace. 

NASTURTIUM: healing. 

NEROLI: love. 

NETTLE: exorcism, protection, healing, lust, abundance, 3rd and 6th chakra, banishing, stress management, and gossip management. 

NIAOULI: protection. 

NORFOLK ISLAND PINE: protection and anti-hunger. 

NUTMEG: protection, money, health, luck, fidelity, break hexes, burn for prosperity, love, psychic awareness, and relief from nightmares. 

NUTS: fertility, prosperity, love, luck, use for tips on wands, gifts, and communication. 

O

OAK: protection, health, money, healing, potency, fertility, luck, the God, wands, burn leaves to purify the atmosphere, acorns draw money, burn wood for good health, acorns draw money, power, balance, and prosperity. 

OAK MOSS: court cases, money, and protection. 

OATS: money, offering to the god, and stress management.  

OLEANDER: (TOXIC) love. 

OLIVE: healing, peace, fertility, potency, protection, lust, victory, and spirituality. 

ONION: exorcism, healing, protection, purification, money, prophetic dreams, and lust. 

ORANGE: love, divination, luck, and money. 

ORANGE BERGAMOT: prosperity, success, energy, joy, friendship, success, prosperity, psychic awareness, peels for love, and incense for good fortune. 

ORCHID: love and psychic powers. 

OREGON GRAPE: money and prosperity. 

ORRIS: divination, protection, love, prosperity, money, clairvoyance, sex, and psychic awareness. 

P

PALMAROSA: healing and love. 

PALM DATE: fertility and potency. 

PANSY: love, divination, rain magick, mental powers, and strength. 

PAPAY: protection, love, and wishes.  

PAPYRUS: protection, wisdom, and self-insight. 

PAROSELA: hunting.  

PARSLEY: purification, protection, lust, love, fertility, and prosperity. 

PASSION FLOWER: peace, sleep, friendships prosperity, increase libido, popularity, anger management, and stress management. 

PATCHOULI: money, fertility, lust, break hexes, incense for drawing money, earth, underworld, business, confidence, court cases, love, desire, prosperity, protection, success, sex, and enemies. 

PAU D'ARCO: fertility, wards off negativity,  and clears. 

PEA: money and love. 

PEACH: exorcism, love, fertility, wishes, longevity, broken heart, and youth. 

PEAR: love and lust. 

PECAN: money, employment, prosperity, dreams, and discipline. 

PENNYROYAL: exorcism, consecration, strength, protection, peace, and healing. 

PEONY: exorcism, protection, and purification. 

PEPPER: exorcism, protection, use in amulets or grow for protection, and wards off negativity. 

PEPPERMINT: purification, sleep, love, healing, psychic powers, divination, money, apathy, exorcism, insight, lust, menopause, and clears energy and space. 

PEPPER TREE: protection, purification, and healing. 

PERIWINKLE: (TOXIC) Protection, money, love, lust, and mental clarity. 

PERSIMMON: healing, luck, changing sex, and insight into others. 

PETITGRAIN: protection. 

PILOT WEED: protection. 

PIMENTO: love. 

PIMPERNEL: protection and health. 

PINE: (TOXIC) protection, exorcism, money, healing, fertility, brush outdoor ritual area with a branch to purify and sanctify, burn for cleansing, needles in money spells, spirituality, gambling, dreams, cleansing, banishing, purification, prosperity, employment, birth, rebirth, strength, life and immortality. 

PINECONE: magic, human enlightenment, resurrection, strength, internal life, health, fertility, and regeneration.

PINEAPPLE: luck, money, chastity, hospitality, and protection. 

PIPSISSEWA: money and calling in good spirits. 

PISTACHIO: breaking love spells. 

PLANTAIN: protection, healing, strength, and snake repelling. 

PLUM: protection, love, healing, and self-confidence. 

PLUMERIA: (TOXIC) love. 

POKE: (TOXIC) courage and breaks hexes. 

POMEGRANATE: divination, luck, wealth, wishes, and fertility. 

POPLAR: money, astral projection, and success. 

POPPY: fertility, love, sleep, money, luck, healing, and invisibility. 

POTATO: healing, image magick, astral projection, separation, foundations, and earth energy. 

PRICKLY ASH: love. 

PRIMROSE: protection and love. 

PURSLANE: protection, love, happiness, luck, and sleep. 

Q

QUASSIA: love.

QUEEN OF THE MEADOW: power and protection.

QUINCE: protection, love, and happiness.

R

RADISH: protection and lust. 

RAGWEED: courage, faeries, and elves. 

RAGWORT: protection. 

RASPBERRY: healing, visions, protection, love, alleviates labor pains, spirit of centre, and spring equinox. 

RATTLESNAKE ROOT: protection and money. 

RED CLOVER BLOSSOMS: abundance, love, money, protection, success, and summer solstice. 

RED ROOT: clears energy and dispels. 

RHUBARB: health, protection, and fidelity. 

RICE: protection, money, fertility, rain, blessings, and weather magick. 

ROOTS: protection, divination, and power. 

ROSE: beauty, protection, purification, love, psychic powers, healing, divination, peace, luck, courage, catalyst, sex,  sleep, prophetic dreams, anger management, love divination, abundance, attraction, and prosperity. 

ROSE GERANIUM: protection. 

ROSE HIPS: healing, luck, call in good spirits, abundance, strength, and fall equinox ceremony. 

ROSEMARY: exorcism, protection, healing, love, lust, mental clarity, sleep, youth, burn for purification, wards negativity, love, blessing, consecration, cleansing, strength, wishes, dreams, beauty, theft, healing, psychic ability, spirit of south, grow to attract elves, and blessing. 

ROWAN: protection, success, psychic powers, healing, power, wands and amulets for knowledge, incense of leaves and berries for divination, fires to call upon spirits for help, grow for protection of the home, inspiration, wisdom, enhances magic, and attracts faeries. 

RUE: exorcism, protection, purification, break hexes, health, mental clarity, healing, blessing, consecration, use in altar oil, love, money and wealth, and gossip management. 

RYE: love and fidelity. 

S

SAFFRON: love, lust, healing, strength, happiness, psychic powers, wind raising, and depression management. 

SAGE: purification, protection, wisdom, longevity, wishes, health, immortality, intuition, divination, luck, prosperity, money, spirituality, menopause, psychic ability, clears, inner guide, longevity, and vision.

SAGEBRUSH: exorcism, protection, purification, joy, and peace. 

ST. JOHN’S WORT: (TOXIC) exorcism, protection, courage, strength, happiness, health, love divination, burn at Litha to send away negativity, wear for invincibility, willpower, gathered at Litha, power, and stress management. 

SALTPETER: unwanted advances. 

SANDALWOOD: protection, exorcism, purification, wishes, healing, spirituality, full moon esbats, wards negativity, spirit offering, luck, sex, banishing, astral projection, business, success, and mental powers. 

SARSAPARILLA: love, money, inner strength, grounding, and purification. 

SASSAFRAS: money, health, and healing. 

SENNA: love. 

SERPENTARIA ROOT: love and aphrodisiacs. 

SESAME: money, success in business, lust, happiness, and gambling. 

SHALLOT: purification. 

SHAMROCKS: faeries and elves. 

SHEPHERDS PURSE: sleep, depression management, and healing. 

SKULLCAP: peace, love, fidelity, stress management, and anxiety management. 

SKUNK CABBAGE: good fortune and legal matters. 

SLIPPERY ELM: halts gossip, aids verbal communication and development, enemies, friendship, and ends disputes. 

SLOE: exorcism, protection, and banishes negative energy/entities. 

SNAKEROOT: money, luck, break hexes, love, and lust. 

SNAPDRAGON: protection, break hexes, exorcism, prophetic dreams, prosperity, gossip management, and money and wealth. 

SOLOMON’S SEAL: love, exorcism, protection, and an offering to the elementals for their aid. 

SOUTHERNWOOD: love, lust, protection, and faeries and elves. 

SPANISH MOSS: protection. 

SPEARMINT: healing, love, and mental clarity. 

SPIDERWORT: love. 

SPIKENARD: health, fidelity, love, luck, strength, wisdom, and mental powers. 

SQUILL: protection, money, break hexes, and business. 

STAR ANISE: psychic powers, luck, good fortune, and spiritual powers. 

STEPHANOTIS: lust. 

STILLENGIA: psychic powers. 

STRAW: luck, attracts fairies, do not burn magik infused straw, it will bring ill-fortune, used as an image to protect an area, image magick, and fertility. 

STRAWBERRY: love, luck, joy, and broken heart. 

SUGAR CANE: love, lust, prosperity, and sympathy. 

SUMBUL: psychic powers, love, luck, and health. 

SUMMER SAVOURY: mental clarity and strength, and mental powers. 

SUNFLOWER: wisdom, health, wishes, fertility, happiness, friendship, and prosperity. 

SWEETGRASS: calling in good spirits, bringer of positive energy, clears, seals In, burned after white sage which clears, and spirit of east. 

SWEET PEA: strength, courage, friendship, chastity, truth, and love. 

T

TAMARIND: love. 

TAMARISK: exorcism and protection. 

TANGERINE: magickal power. 

TANSY: healing, health, and longevity. 

TEA: strength, courage, prosperity, riches, and health. 

THISTLE HOLLY: purification and hex breaking. 

THISTLE MILK: exorcism, protection, healing, strength, break hexes, and snake enraging. 

THYME: purification, courage, psychic powers, sleep, wards negativity, burn for purification, and healing spells, love, renewal, youth, divination, prophetic dreams, faery folk, and romance. 

TI: protection and healing. 

TOADFLAX: protection and break hexes. 

TOADSTOOL: (TOXIC) rain making. 

TOBACCO: (TOXIC) healing, purification, and offerings. 

TOMATO: protection, prosperity, and love. 

TONKA: (TOXIC) courage, love, money, wishes, luck, friendship, and prosperity. 

TORMENTIL: protection and love. 

TREFOIL: decorate altar, protection, luck, when taking one, and leave a bit of ginger or milk poured into the ground as payment to the fairies. 

TRILLIUM: love, luck, and money. 

TUBEROSE: love, lust, peace, and psychic awareness. 

TULIP: protection, prosperity, and love. 

TURMERIC: purification (used with sea salt), fortification, strength, and clears aggression. 

TURNIP: protection, endings, and banish negativity. 

U

UVA URSA: (TOXIC) psychic powers. 

V

VALERIAN: protection, purification, love, sleep, prophetic dreams, peace, sex, friendship, anxiety management, and self esteem. 

VANILLA: love, lust, mental clarity, money, confidence, attracting people, magickal power, prosperity, success, and wishes. 

VENUS FLYTRAP: protection and love. 

VERVAIN: sleep, protection, purification, love, money, peace, healing, gather/burn at Litha, altar offering, brings riches, creativity, wards psychic attack, youth, chastity, astral projection, unwanted advances, anger management, and prosperity. 

VETCH GIANT: fidelity. 

VETIVERT: love, luck, money, break hexes, wards negativity, anti-theft, exorcism, wishes, peace, protection, prosperity, and divination. 

VIOLET: protection, healing, love, lust, luck, wishes, peace, sleep, insight, and visions. 

W

WAHOO: (TOXIC) courage, success, and breaks hexes. 

WALNUT: health, mental clarity, wishes, infertility, spirituality, and travel. 

WATERCRESS: healing. 

WAX PLANT: protection and power. 

WHEAT: money, fertility, and prosperity. 

WHITE WILLOW BARK: healing, blessings, binding, sacred earth connection between human and earth and spirit, protection, and spirit of east. 

WILD LETTUCE: love divination, protection, sleep, opens to the deeper consciousness, and attunes to deeper meanings. 

WILD PLUM: healing. 

WILD YAM: fortification, grounding, release, and 1st chakra. 

WILLOW: protection, healing, love, burn bark with sandalwood for divination, vitality, energy, ending pain, moon magic, wishing, spirits, death passage, besom, inspiration, and psychic energy. 

WINTERGREEN: protection, healing, break hexes, strength, good fortune, and opens channels. 

WINTER’S BARK: success. 

WISTERIA: spirituality. 

WITCH GRASS: exorcism, happiness, love, and lust. 

WITCH HAZEL: protection, chastity, healing, beauty, and unwanted advances. 

WOLF’S BANE: (TOXIC) protection and invisibility. 

WOOD BETONY: love, purification, and protection. 

WOOD ROSE: luck. 

WOOD SORREL: healing, and health.

WOODRUFF: protection, money, victory, add to Beltane wine to clear away barriers, success, changes, psychic awareness, and prosperity. 

WORMWOOD: (TOXIC, BURN IN WELL VENTILATED AREA, PREFERABLY OUTDOORS) exorcism, protection, love, psychic powers, calling spirits, protection while traveling, evocation, divination, scrying (stronger when combined with Mugwort) at Samhain, sacred to the moon, good luck, clairvoyance, divination, and safety in cars. 

Y

YARROW: healing, divination, exorcism, protection, courage, love, psychic powers, happy marriage (wedding bouquet), wards negativity, defense, protection, gather at Litha, happiness, fidelity, broken heart, prophetic dreams, spirit of south, clears, and stimulates movement. 

YELLOWDOCK ROOT: clears stuck energy and fortification. 

YELLOW EVENING PRIMROSE: hunting. 

YERBA MATE: love, lust, and fidelity. 

YERBA SANTA: protection, healing, psychic powers, beauty, and clears channel to divine life force. 

YEW: (TOXIC) Yule symbol for death and rebirth, used for dagger handles, raising the dead, psychic awareness, and spirits. 

YLANG YLANG: insight, love, past lives, peace, sex, and visions. 

YOHIMBE: (TOXIC) love and lust. 

YUCCA: protection, purification, and transmutation. 

[marigold-hills]

june 29: blooming and June 30: camper | @wolfstarmicrofic | word count: 1009

PREVIOUS PART • FIRST PART

June, some years later.

There are lines in the stones like fingerprints, swirling into a pattern too ancient to be understood. Something carved into it, unique to it and yet connecting it with countless others just like it.

You are you, but you are of us.

Remus is cataloguing the lines, tracing them onto parchment. He stands in a bloom of flowers, careful around the blossoms not to trample them but helpless to do just that, the stone unreachable on any beaten track.

It’s the third day of their, Remus and Sirius’, stay in Brú na Bóinne. The land cradled into the arm of the river had welcomed them with unusual heat, cessation of the hostile rain which has been battering it for the previous month, and an explosion of greenery. As if the land knew: a man comes and he is a part of us, and here to study us. Show him the best parts.

Sirius can understand. He’s no stranger to making himself pretty to get his Moony’s approval.

It’s been long in the making, this trip of theirs. Endless research proposals and grant applications that Remus had to submit, then even more scrutiny on account of his status. Then, oxymoronically, a back and forth on Sirius’ involvement: a highly trained curse breaker to oversee “the werewolf professor” was welcome, but another pair of hands and eyes and feet at the sacred prehistoric site was most definitely not.

Still, somehow, it worked. They had jumped in their camper van and set out for Ireland.

“Time for lunch, Moons!” Sirius calls from under the canopy they’ve set up next to the van.

Remus, loose sleeves of a linen shirt folded to show his arms, leather suspenders holding up his trousers, looks like an academic wet dream. His hair has grown out a bit recently and now the curls fall softly over his forehead.

“You’ve forgotten your hat again,” Sirius admonishes when he gets under the canopy they set up by the van, two chairs and a small table set up with bread and cheeses. “It’s too hot for you to go around without cover.”

“Stop fussing,” Remus bats his hand away, “I’m fine.”

“My one purpose here is to take care of you. I have paperwork to show for it. Want to see? No? So let me do my job,” Sirius grins as they sit to eat.

“You’re enjoying this way too much, love. And don’t pretend like you need paperwork to be a fusspot. Never stopped you before.”

“Got me there.”

Sirius pulls a bottle of white wine from the enchanted cooler by his feet, summons two glasses.

“Drinking on the job?” Remus raises an eyebrow in mock outrage, “how scandalous.”

“You know me, always ready to bend the rules.”

Remus hummus happily and plucks away at the assortment of cheeses. The wine is crisp, faintly tasting of apricot. The grass around them is blooming daisies, the scent fresh. Sirius puts his hair up with his wand.

“I’ll never forget that you came here with me,” Remus says with a far away vice. “I’m so thankful to have you by my side. This… you know how much of a dream this has been.”

“Hold onto that thought, darling, please,” Sirius says, standing up. He was worried how to steer the conversation and here is his Moony, providing the perfect segue.

The cord is in a neat little package in his pocket, so he pulls it out and sets in front of Remus, by the plate of cheese and the bowl of olives.

“What’s this?”

“Open it.”

Remus does. It takes a moment, Sirius can see, for it to register, then he touches the cord with reverent, shaky fingers. “Really?” He asks, like it’s a surprise, like he doesn’t know the extent of Sirius’ devotion to him, to them.

“You don’t have to say yes straight away. It’s the anniversary today, of when you waited for me, and I will wait for you as long as it takes. But I’m ready. So if you’ll have me…”

“My love. My star,” Remus stands up, holding onto the cord so tightly his knuckles turn white. “Yes. Yes now and yes forever.”

And Sirius was pretty sure, but still… hearing the response breaks something fragile inside of him right open. “Really?”

“Of course. Always. Mo réalta,” Remus holds his face between shaky hands, cord still in between fingers, “you are the most important part of my life.”

***

They have the ceremony the same evening, just the two of them. Barefoot, standing ankle-deep in the waters of the Bóinne. It’s cool, calm. Laps at their skin like an embrace or like a welcoming.

The sun has set. The crickets are singing. Sirius had enchanted lanterns to float around them, and disillusioned the area against wandering muggles.

Their left hands are clasped, fingers intertwined.

There are tears in Remus’ eyes as he speaks. His accent more pronounced with the emotion.

“Ye are Blood of my Blood, and Bone of my Bone. I give ye my Body, that we Two might be One. I give ye my Spirit, ’til our Life shall be Done.”

He wraps his end of the cord around their joint hands. Sirius can feel the bond blossoming, blooming through him like molten honey. He responds.

“You are blood of my blood, and bone of my bone.” The incantation sounds different in his southern english voice, but he can feel it working nonetheless, a link between himself and Remus, between the both of them and the Irish soil. “I give you my body, that we two might be one. I give you my spirit, till our life shall be done.”

The cord glows a soft gold when Sirius finishes wrapping up his end. They reach their right hands across, over the joining, and the cord tightens and dissolves. Sirius can feel it just the same, over his hand and over his heart.

“Mine, now,” his Moony says, closing the distance between them.

“Always.”

He kisses him under the waxing moon.

NOTES

I cried

decided to put the last two into one epilogue because breaking them up just didn’t seem right

thank you SO MUCH to everyone that followed, and especially: @hoje--aqui @moon-girl88 @digital-kam @tealeavesandtrash and @sweetstarryskies you guys are the absolute best and properly fuelled the writing for this one with all the lovely comments. I honestly did not expect such a lovely response when I decided to start this project so it was just heart warming :):) thank you

as it turns out I’ve been doing tagging wrong (showing my age here) so if anyone has asked to be tagged and wasn’t I’m very sorry

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for the last time:

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[hernakedmuse]

Eddie Munson x Horror!Bimbo Reader 🦇 💕 Part One

Headcanons about Horror!Bimbo

Horror!Bimbo isn't Harrington rich but she isn't Munson poor, she's lower middle class. Her dad is very distant, he manages the grocery store in town. Her mother is a part time librarian, and is there for reader as much as she can be.

She has an older sister who is studying pre med at The University of Chicago, they were once close but her sister became snobby once she started living in Chicago and only visits on holidays now. She thinks reader is stupid and hopeless with no future.

Horror!Bimbo!Reader is 18, a senior while Eddie is 20.

Horror!Bimbo!Reader has a white German Shepherd called Pyewacket.

Pyewacket hates everybody except for reader, she rescued him from a mean neighbor who would chain him up as a puppy. They've been thick as thieves ever since.

Pyewacket doesn't even let her parents into her room without some growling and snarling.

Horror!Bimbo!Reader also has a white rat called Socrates who often rests on her chest while she watches movies.

Pyewacket was the name of a famous witch cat in the Salem Witch Trials and a familiar in the 50s film Bell, Book, and Candles. AND Socrates was the name of Willard's white rat in Willard(1971).

Horror!Bimbo!Reader has a big oral fixation, she's constantly chewing her Extra! Refreshing bubble gum, or sucking on heart shaped lollipops that she hoards a bunch of from Valentine's Day that last her throughout the year.

It drives poor Eddie insane watching her mouth like that.

And she has such a distracting mouth, especially with all her lip gloss and lip liner defined lipstick painted lips.

And she's a big lip biter too.

He has spent many a time jacking off to the thought of those lips wrapped around him. With her shirt bunched up above her perky tits that never seemed to wear a bra for some reason.

And her plush ass that was alwayss adorn with a thong that he could see under very short skirts when she would bend over, her pussy lips puffier than the average girl and would be straining against the lace or satin of her thong, a lot of the time not completely covered.

Eddie has shamefully bust in his jeans at the sight at least twice.

And when she wears her obscenely tight jeans, her whale tail of her thong would peak out from the top of the high waist cut somehow, and you could easily see the outline of her thick vagina through the crotch of the jeans.

And almost always you could see the nipples of her bouncing tits through her shirts.

She tortured poor Eddie, especially when she would always smile so sweetly at him through the hall with a breathy Daryl Hannah "Hi Eddie" that she always managed to sound suggestive.

And in class (they have English and Pre-Calc together) , she always managed to sit in front of him, leaning forward so he could see her whale tail, or her juicy pouty lips when she'd ask to borrow a pencil that she would chew on and suck on before giving it back to him. (He is a little ashamed to admit he saves a whole collection of those at home). He'd also get high off her succulent smells. Like her strawberry shampoo, rosewater body lotion, her apricot hand cream, either baby powder and vanilla body mists or spicy and fruity Poison by Dior that he knew she would shoplift from the department store at Starcourt.

Our little bimbo has sticky fingers. Her family isn't the richest and she is such a seagull. Sees something shiny, might be a little too costly, like expensive lingerie or luxurious perfumes and she HAS to have it. Flirting with sales men and women and stealthily swiping the goods.

Eddie remembers the day he first met reader.

First day of her senior year, she walks into English in an outfit he knew she would get dress coded for, faded blue daisy dukes that squeezed the life of her dump truck ass and accentuated the lewd shape of her cunt. A red cropped tank top that was a little loose with a strap falling off her summer-loved shoulder, but tight around her bouncing unbound breasts. She had on white socks bunched from black doc like combat boots, and her hair up in a messy but very pretty high half pony half bun she had pinned up on top of her head, tendrils and loks framing her face and sticking to the back of her neck for it was an Indiana September. Her bangs framing her face and silver gold hoop earrings adorned her ears, red lipstick daringly painted her lips and black self manicured nails adorned her hands. She looked like a centerfold and he couldn't take his eyes off of her, neither could the other guys.

He knew it wasn't just lust however when she complimented his Black Sabbath t-shirt and then commented how she loves Ozzy solo work and rambled about an alter she once had to honor Randy Rhoads.

No, it was safe to say Eddie fell in love with her after that.

She was never ashamed to be seen talking to him. Sure she wasn't miss popular, the boys only talked to her because of her bimbo appearance but they all saw her as a witchy slut. They found her creepy but hot because she loves horror films so very much.

She's a little bit of an airhead, things tend to fly over her head, but she does love reading surprisingly. She has been scolded by teachers countless of times for reading in class ironically, and sometimes ditched to read in the library because the librarians adore her.

She likes to get lost in books and be in another world because she felt lonely in the real one.

Reader doesn't have friends, she comes off odd.

She giggles too much and blinks rapidly and shakes her head when she doest get things which is often.

Her mom says she doesn't process things like everyone else but that doesn't mean she's dumb.

She stares a lot and kind of looks like she has no thought in her head as she floats on through but she is actually lost in her own fantasies constantly through the day.

Eddie finds it adorable, and when people make fun of her for her oddities and aloofness he will do something outrageous to take the attention off of her, to protect her.

He saw she had nowhere to sit at lunch and invited her to his table, he realized despite being so beautiful she's the loneliest person in school.

She was so honored to be invited having a crush on him since freshman year. How could she not? He looks like the boys on her wall. Like Hawkins own personal rock star.

She became of Hellfire and with DnD she had him explain it like twenty times. Some of his friends may have groaned when she said 'wait' for the twelfth time, but we're silenced by theor DM's lethal glare.

She loved creating characters so much and had fun creating hers The Enchantress.

Reader always made food for the club which made them take to her easily.

She loves to cook and bake, she could be in her own world like when she would read or watch movies all day.

Her favorite book is Flowers in the Attic, and her favorite movies are The Company of Wolves, Slumber Party Massacre, and The Wicker Man. She will watch any horror film.

Her favorite colors to wear a red, pink, occasionally black.

[stem-sister-scuffle]

STEM SISTER SCUFFLE: ROUND 1 MASHUP 9

Mercymorn The First (The Locked Tomb) vs GLaDOS (Portal)

Mercymorn The First is a Cryogenics Scientist and Anatomist!

GLaDOS is a Quantum Physicist and Behavioural Psychologist!

Why you should vote for each contestant:

Mercymorn The First:

"Scientist working on human cryogenics/necromancy. She's a genius in a codependent toxic polycule with God."

"Fits the criteria for STEM (science, tech, engineering, math (specifically science)), and also Quirky STEM (stabbing, tearing, eating, maiming). She was a scientist trying to save humanity from global warming, before one of her science buddies became a necromancer and killed the entire world. Now she’s the meanest lady ever and had a threesome with god. Also she got ultra exploded (also by god)"

"She was trying very, very hard to save humanity! She was aiming to preserve people for an interstellar voyage, so that humans could survive the end of the world. It didn't work out and the project got shut down, but after the world ended she pioneered the field of necromantic healing and was known as the foremost anatomical expert among God's Lyctors. She says ick! bleh! out loud when she's disgusted. Also she's much, much more ethical than most people in the series."

"She was a doctor that joined several of her friends, most of whom were other STEM people and a few who weren't, in trying to convince the governments of the world to make an active plan to save the world from climate change. This ended up with one of them destroying the solar system and everything in it, resurrecting it all, and becoming God. She was resurrected as one of his Saints, and continued to use her medical knowledge to become an anatomy specialist and as a key part of a plan between her and another of their friends to take down God for being a tyrant. She might have been an OBGYN but I can't remember if that's actually canon. Also, she has naturally "apricot-colored" (so, pink) hair."

"She was a Regular Doctor working to save humanity from climate change but got resurrected by her friend after he ended the world and became a powerful goddess-like figure. She uses her knowledge of human anatomy to do crazy flesh magic including making her hair naturally pink just for funsies (iconic). She doesn't put up with any bullshit from anyone, including the universe's ostensible god. I love her"

"It's not specifically described but she was the medical support in a cryosleep project, and she knows enough later to have artificially created a baby without either of the biological parents knowing about it

She's the worst and I love her. Here's a description of her in Harrow the Ninth:

You could press your hand to Ianthe’s chest, if you wanted—which you didn’t, naturally—and the blood-warm sternum beneath would gradually unfold for you. But it would take effort, and close contact, and you would need to know the sternum.

Mercymorn the First knew the sternum. Mercymorn the First knew the pericardial fat, the soft-tissue secrets of the mediastinum, the false-heart shape of the thymus. You might have to press your whole palm to Ianthe’s breastbone—doubtless—and take valuable seconds to search out the bone, and the things behind the bone, their characters, their locations. Mercymorn could pinpoint your pineal gland with the merest touch to the skull. This was not due to some Lyctoral power that she alone possessed, no honed necromantic theorem; as God had told you, she had simply memorised the body, by rote, over the course of ten thousand years. She had studied the measurements and their range of differences, and on the rare occasions when she needed to assume where something was or how it worked, her assumptions had the accuracy of ten thousand years’ experience. What Mercy didn’t know about the body wasn’t just not worth knowing, said the Emperor; if she didn’t know it, it hadn’t existed previously.

Over the dinner table you asked Augustine why, if it was simply a matter of memory, he hadn’t done the same thing. Ianthe choked discreetly on a forkful of boiled flour-paste shapes in red sauce. “Lord! I can barely remember what I had for lunch last week,” he said. “Besides, anatomy has too narrow an application.” Mercymorn opened her mouth, hurricane eyes promising a coastal lashing, and said, “Application!” but Augustine said, languidly— “One would only really need it to kill Lyctors, Harrowhark, and the rest of us never evinced any interest in that.”

That broke up the dinner somewhat.

This is her and I love her dearly

https://youtu.be/pvJOuUJNcx8"

GLaDOS:

"i’m not sure how to explain this one. she’s an evil computer who makes a woman do fucked up tasks that all involve a portal gun in some way. evil computer woman i love you :3"

"She's witty, fun, they had to restrain her intelligence and it didn't work-"

"She should be able to kill everyone forever. Anyways she runs aperture she loves science so much it transcended lives and identity. It’s just what she does"

"she kills people 👍 shes cool and i like her"

"…. I mean she’s categorically not but it would be funny to include her. Again, it would be Very Funny"

"mad scientist robot representation with a complex emotional arc through multiple video games"

"She might not know what the point of her tests are, but she sure is good at making them. Bonus points for being hot"

"Managed a massive and highly advanced scientific facility in which she ran tests and experiments long after the fall of human civilization. Chell/GLaDOS <3"

"She’s GLaDOS"

[c1rcasurv1vor]

studying in free period ❌ indulging in an0r3xic urge to walk around local supermarket for ages looking at c4lories and macros on everything ✅✅

got some stuff as well

i fear this made me broke though bc the only supermarket in my town is the bougie expensive one and i was too tired to walk to the next town over cause it would be ages back to my house 😪

anyway the protein bar is 15g for 149 c4ls with no nuts (i’m allergic) which seems crazy?? like bro i didn’t know they knew how to do that 😦 hopefully doesn’t taste like ass (it probably will tbh)

also i’ve never tried dried apricots before but i wanted some dried fruit and it seemed the most appealing

i shouldn’t go shopping when i’m hungry bc i did not need to spend six great british pounds on all this

but also

VAMPIRE CAT

i have christened him miles and he has greatly improved the quality of my life already

anyway i’ll let u know how the protein bar and fruit end up being

[libraryofmoths]

Moth of the Week

Red-Belted Clearwing

Synanthedon myopaeformis

Image Source

The red-belted clearwing is a part of the family Sesiidae. It was first described in 1789 by Moritz Balthasar Borkhausen as Sphinx myopaeformis. This was later changed to Synanthedon myopaeformis. This moth is called the red-belted clearwing in Europe, the apple clearwing moth in North America, and the apple borer. This is due to their tendency to damage their host apple trees. It is considered a pest in Europe.

They may be confused with the large red-belted clearwing and the red-tipped clearwing.

Description This moth has a thin, dark blue, segmented body. The body is hairless aside from a bushy tail at the end of the abdomen. They are noticeable due to a bright red-orange band on one of the segments of the abdomen. The wings are clear with a dark outline and veins and a fringe on the outer margin (outer edge). The wings help distinguish the red-belted clearwing from the large red-belted and red-tipped clearwings as the wings have no red-orange markings.

Wingspan Range: 1.8 - 2.8 cm (≈0.71 - 1.1 in)

Diet and Habitat This species eats mainly apple, specifically Crab Apple (Malus sylvestris), as well as Pear (Pryus communis), Hawthorn (Crateagus monogyna), Almond (Prunus dulcis), Rowan (Sorbus aucuparia), apricots, cherries, mountain ash, peaches, plums, and quince. In Canada, adult moths have been attracted to the flowers of the snowy milkweed.

They can be found natively in Europe, North Africa, and Asia Minor. This species was noticed to North America and first detected in Canada in 2005. They inhabit well established orchards and gardens, hedgerows, open woodland, and mature scrub.

Mating Adults emerge from their cocoons in early summer and on flight from May to August, this is presumably their mating season. Females can lay up to 250 eggs, usually singly in the cracks or damaged areas of the trunk and branches they are hosting in. Females attract males with pheromones released from glands. A 2010 study found that 3,13-octadecadienyl acetate is the primary sex hormone.

Predators The larvae of this moth are preyed on by parasites, fungi, and bacteria. The main parasite of red-belted clearwing larvae is Liotryphan crassiseta. Other parasites are Nematodes, Steinernema sp. The fungi Beauveria bassiana and Metarhizium brunneum are common causes of death in larvae as well as the bacteria Bacillus thuringiensis.

Fun Fact

The adult red-belted clearwings are significantly less active on cold days compared to warm days.

In 2014, Judd and Eby found that S. myopaeformis does not discriminate between yellow, green and white or between purple, blue, red, and black. This suggests that they are dichromatic, meaning they can perceive mainly two colors. This affected traps set to catch this species as they acted differently depending on the light reflected.

As this species is considered a pest to apple trees, people have attempted to control the population. This has been tried with pheromone/mating disruption, pheromone laced traps, other chemical traps, the use of predators/enemies, and the covering of apple tree trunks in oil.

(Source: Wikipedia [1][2][3], Butterfly Conservation, Michigan State University)

[anticidic]

Many a moons we have spoken,

Stories told with our emotions,

Passing glances and sunshine eyes,

Tell me the thoughts you picturize?

"Every song, every sunset, it all just reminds me of you."

“You and me. Together.”

He was young and it was summer when they were down by the water, hand-in-hand. Dazai looked distant, casting his gaze out to the lonely sea with such longing that it smelled strongly of salt and felt like the seaweed slime washing ashore. Chuuya got down on one knee and cupped his hands around sand. Warm. The grains slipped from between his fingers the same way opportunities and the concept of them slipped from their future. The past. The present. And the future. Infinite possibilities condensed into a single moment beneath the sun with a flock of seagulls circling above, searching for a place to roost. The waters lapped at their feet and soaked their toes.

He held Dazai's hand a little tighter. Because if he didn't, Dazai might drift out to sea and be lost like all the other sunken ruins and forgotten treasures down, down at the bottom of the ocean. The way Dazai looked at him and the way Dazai felt—felt so right and looked positively brimming with adoration by evening but by day poisoned with envy—Chuuya ached. Envy for what he couldn't be, but it mattered not to Chuuya. He cared not for what Dazai could never be. He loved what was.

Then, he caught a whiff of cinnamon: reminding him of some bygone spring when they took a dive. Chuuya surfaced first with a gasp, sucking breath into his lungs and coughing out water. To his left, nothing. To his right, bubbles on the surface. A reflection of messy brown curls. Then a hand on his ankle.

It pulled him down under.

Chuuya fought to keep his eyes open underwater, but the salt stung. Almost too much. Dazai held a finger to his mouth. Be quiet. If he could speak. And then a playful smile with hidden intent played on his lips and Chuuya understood.

When they resurfaced, they heard the faraway calling of Chuuya's parents. The king and queen. Wanting their prince back at home. Safe and sound. Where he belonged and where Dazai did not and never would. Dazai was a worker at the end of the day, in suit and tie with tray in hand going around asking members of royal families the same, persistent question: "Refreshments?"

The sun tickled his cheeks with a pleasant warmth. This was their little secret, after all. The same secret they planted and protected from the snow and flooding rains. The secret that blossomed and became soft as rose petals and embraced them in longing. The longing smelled of apricot among the reeds. Of dozens of little fireflies half past dusk. And they were gazing up at a starless sky on a hill with the grass beneath them, bodies touching.

“Chuuya!”

This time, his father called. They always called for him, but never for Dazai.

At the end of the day, Chuuya and Dazai were one. Two entwined souls torn apart by day that always found their way back to one another after sunset.

Dazai was the world by day. Needed. With great expectations upon his shoulders that he sometimes tired of them all. But he lived for watering the garden beneath Chuuya's balcony if only to listen in on the prince humming the quietest melody whisked away on the wind.

By night, he became nothing. An exhaled afterthought once the king and queen put their heads on their pillows and the lights went out.

And by night, he became Chuuya’s everything.

“Forever?”

Home. There was a time when Chuuya wouldn't question that word. Home was here, where his mother and father were. But now? Everything was different. Draped in absence, void, memories of the past. He would never see his mother again fixing her hair at the dressing table. No one browsing old books in father's study. And in the hallways, there was only the spirit of the carefree child who now tried to find himself in a new reality.

“And ever. And ever.”