#apostle Nathanael

[beethovencool]

John 1:48-49

[momentsbeforemass]

Not Nathanael

(for all of us who are less than perfect)

A lot of Apostles share names.

There are two with the name of James. Two Simons, even two Judas’s. But there’s only one Nathanael.

That’s plenty. And today’s Gospel shows us why.

The first time Nathanael and Jesus see each other, everything clicks into place. Jesus says to him, “here is someone in whom there is no deceit.” And Nathanael’s response? “You are the Son of God.”

Unlike every other Apostle, Nathanael immediately knows exactly who Jesus is. Like flipping a switch. How is that even possible?

It’s simple, actually. And it’s a ringing indictment of you and me, and every other person for whom it isn’t like flipping a switch. Because of what it tells us about Nathanael. Which is?

In the words of C.S. Lewis, “It takes holiness to detect holiness.”

That’s why Nathanael immediately knows exactly who Jesus is. Because that’s how holy he is.

Jesus reached out to Nathanael once. And Nathanael got it.

That’s why one Nathanael is plenty. That’s why you and I need the rest of the Apostles. 

Because the rest of the Apostles? They’re a mixed mess. One of them over-promises and underperforms. Two of them are all about recognition and being first. One of them is a revolutionary. Another one has doubts. You get the idea.

The part I love? How Jesus treats the rest of the Apostles. The mixed mess. The ones who aren’t already holy. The not-Nathanael’s.

When they don’t get it immediately? Watch what Jesus does. Jesus doesn’t give up on them.

Time after time. Jesus tells them, and shows them, exactly who He is. And for years, none of it really clicks for them.

But Jesus doesn’t hold them to the Nathanael standard.

Jesus reaches out to them. And keeps reaching out to them. Until they get it.

It shows us that there’s a place in the heart of Jesus for each one of them.

And it’s a sign of hope. For all of us.

Because it shows us that there’s a place in the heart of God for each one of us.

For you and me, and all of the other not-Nathanael’s.

Even if we’re not already holy.

Today’s Readings

[belovedivies]

Hello👋 I was wondering how would the skinless chicken-I MEAN Nathanael interact with Raphael's older sibling?😅

cw: minor spoiler dividers-credit: @kodaswrld m.list

nathaniel and you…

⋆ ˚｡⋆are the epitome of a match made in hell! We have a body dissection loving maniac who breaks guns with bare hands and a sociopath whose father you buried for the throne that your brother now occupies. Of course, you guys get along like a house on fire.

⋆ ˚｡⋆surprisingly have the time to hang out. You always find a way to forcefully squeeze yourself into his schedule, like dropping by unannounced during his night shifts so you can whip him away for a few minutes! The nurses and patients mistake you two for a couple all the time, something Nathaniel doesn’t bother to clarify anymore.

⋆ ˚｡⋆share what can almost be considered as a bond despite the chaos going on. Aside from Raphael, he’s the one guy whose company you somewhat enjoy and find amusement in. You’re also the only girl who gets to spray deodorant in this scary man’s face and don’t end up being slammed against the wall. It’s a win-win! ☪︎ ･ﾟ ･Nathaniel... begrudgingly acknowledges the influence you have on Glory Club. How a fragile-looking woman can command fear and respect without trying. He, though, still has a hard time wrapping his head around the mind-boggling jokes you blurt out sometimes versus the cruelty you’re capable of inflicting. One night, after a quick patient checkup, the Apostle found you in the hallway along with two of his men out cold on the floor, their hands and legs bent at all different angles. Then you just ran up to him with a smile, never elaborating on what happened. ☪︎ ･ﾟ ･You... think Nathaniel’s pride now might as well be his downfall. He’s strong, he’s smart, and he has potential. But this is THE Peter we’re talking about. If that boogeyman is lurking around the corner and somehow still as unbeatable as he was 50 years ago, Nathaniel—even in all his evolutionary glory—statistically stands no chance of surviving. And if he is lucky enough to just barely make it out alive, the man’s ego is gonna be damaged for good. ☪︎ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･❂

“It’s so cold out here…” You tugged your legs underneath your chin and let out a loud yawn, wiggling your feet. “I thought the rainy season ended last week?”

Five centimeters away from you on the bench, Nathaniel leisurely sipped on his Americano. “High humidity levels,” he set the cup aside, “so your clothes might get saturated by the moisture in the air.”

“Huh, guess that’s why I’m still shivering in these 70D stockings—“ mid-sentence, your eyes widened when the guy suddenly took off his blouse and draped it over your lap. “Thanks.”

Nathaniel just shrugged and picked up his drink again. Two nurses walked by and cooed at the scene, though you weren’t sure if the attention was on you or him, or the playing-house act he had been tolerating for a while.

You scanned your surroundings: the hospital’s courtyard was mostly empty at this point. A few elderly patients hung out in the right corner of a dimly lit cafeteria, doing their nighttime stretches. When you look up, a billboard on the side of the building greeted your eyes—a picture of an old-looking Peter with his back hunched. The bounty flashed beneath it in place of the contact number for donation: 7,6 Billion Won.

“Kim Soongu…” The words left your lips as an afterthought, but then you caught Nathaniel’s jaws clenching in your peripheral vision with the coffee cup suddenly crushed to a pulp in his palm, a river of brown dripping to the ground.

The awkward silence didn’t even last for three seconds before a hysterical fit of laughter left your throat as you clung to your stomach.

“Holy fuck—“ snickering, you leaned against Nathaniel’s side like you two were having a sleepover. “Look at the way you got your panties in a twist with just the mention of his name. Is he that good?”

Your slightly-closer-than-an-acquaintance furrowed his eyebrows and answered through gritted teeth. “Brat…”

“Annoying too?” you mirrored his cocked brow with amusement, cheek leaning on his shoulder as you watched the guy slip off his beverage-soaked glove, “didn’t the stats say Soongu is just another D-rank killer though?”

“Not it from my observation.” Nathaniel huffed. “He had some untapped potential. Having him on my team would be… beneficial.”

You tilted your head. “For…?”

“Taking down Peter,” he looked a little irritated at your constant questioning, but ultimately decided not to show that frustration. Instead, Nathaniel’s raspy voice took on what seemed to be a teasing note; his lips curled up into an easy-going smile as the man flicked your forehead.

“So much for your plastic surgery idea, princess.”

“Ow—!” You squealed, touching the violated skin; he wasn’t even using force and you could already feel a bump rising. “What do you mean? So it wasn’t him?”

“It’s real skin from what I felt.” Nathaniel ran a hand over his hair. “Tch, whatever. When he shows up tomorrow, I’ll definitely find out.”

Tomorrow. You tucked your legs further under your chin, eyes still trained on him.

“Hyun Il.”

“?”

The Apostle turned his head towards you.

“You’re 100% likely to die.”

“Doubtful, aren’t we?”

You let out a giggle. “You wanna hear me say it?”

Nathaniel’s gaze hardened. “I will win.”

Cute.

A sigh left your lips as you stared up at the dark sky above. It was a relatively starless night, but there were still some lonely orbs twinkling if you squinted hard enough.

Some saw themselves as the sun—the center of this universe with planets orbiting around them. Constantly striving for a new high. Yet there were bound to be limits. A wall in between. Something, someone who might just show up one day and render all of their efforts useless.

How incompetent we were in the grand scheme of things.

☪︎ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･❂

"Planning to dig up his body?"

Raphael's comment earns a small smile from you. Taking your little brother's hand, you stand up from where you have been crouching on the ground for the last few minutes.

"Nathaniel doesn't need to be physically here to haunt me," you hum playfully while his fingers brush off the imaginary dust on your hair. "Jokes aside, he's cremated. I'm surprised to find out that could still work without the furnace blowing up; he's like a walking T vessel."

"Mhm…"

"Found anything at the scene?"

At your inquiry, Raphael's brows drawn together in a way that reminds you of Nathaniel. Then again, frustration doesn't have a second face.

"Tch, nothing at all." His grip around your shoulders tighten. "That bastard vanished without a trace."

All the killers dying… so that really was Peter's doings. You've seen the outcome from miles away, yet who is to say the result doesn't baffle you in the slightly? What Glory Club is dealing with here is no longer a human being.

"Hey, Raphael…" for a second, the face of an unfamiliar teenager pops up in your mind—black hair, red eyes that hold an immaculate sense of authority, "do you think that…"

"Yes?" Your brother tilted his head. There's a lump in your throat that is suddenly too hard to swallow.

"Nevermind," as quick as that eerie hypothesis comes to be, you forcefully swat it away; a sharp edge to your smile, "let's get back, shall we? It's gonna start raining soon."

[myremnantarmy]

𝐀𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝟐𝟒, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐆𝐨𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐥

Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Jn 1:45-51

Philip found Nathanael and told him,

"We have found the one about whom Moses wrote in the law,

and also the prophets, Jesus son of Joseph, from Nazareth."

But Nathanael said to him,

"Can anything good come from Nazareth?"

Philip said to him, "Come and see."

Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him and said of him,

"Here is a true child of Israel.

There is no duplicity in him."

Nathanael said to him, "How do you know me?"

Jesus answered and said to him,

"Before Philip called you, I saw you under the fig tree."

Nathanael answered him,

"Rabbi, you are the Son of God; you are the King of Israel."

Jesus answered and said to him,

"Do you believe

because I told you that I saw you under the fig tree?

You will see greater things than this."

And he said to him, "Amen, amen, I say to you,

you will see heaven opened and the angels of God

ascending and descending on the Son of Man."

[the-chosen-fanfiction]

John the Apostle | Thunder Blues | Platonic

Dialogue prompt: “Are you serious right now?"

Requested: Yes

When the younger Son of Thunder is upset that he has to stay behind in Capernaum to wait for Simon, you comfort him, reassuring that Jesus knows best.

The Apostles have gathered at Jesus’ behest. Sitting next to John, you watch both Andrew and Philip as they reveal that their ministry has brought more harm than good in the Decapolis. 

Jesus, across from the two, nods in understanding as they conclude their rather distressing story.

“Aha… And… What was your strategy to clarify it?”

Philip takes a sharp breath. “Well, we uh… We told, uhm…” 

“We-We-We tried to… Uh, to tell one of Your parables.” Andrew stutters. It is clear that both of them feel embarrassed. 

“Parables! Good!” Jesus praises, “That’s what I would have done.”

“Which parable?”

Philip clears his throat. “The… The Banquet.”

“You know, the one where guests give excuses not to come and so, everyone else gets invited.”

Next to you, John huffs in disbelief. “You chose the Banquet?” You put a hand on his arm, trying to push him back into his seat, trying to not escalate the situation. You know that the two feel humiliated enough as is by coming clean about their troubled mission.

“People get upset by that one.” Nathanael adds.

“Of course they do.” Jesus hums, but there is no hint of accusation in His voice. 

Andrew lets out an anxious noise: “Well, if it makes you feel any better, we first considered the Wheat and the Tares but… We thought better of it.”

“I already told you,” Jesus patiently explains, “Some people wouldn’t understand that parable.”

“I’m not even sure I understand the Wheat and the Tares.” Thomas adds. You give him an understanding look.

Jesus lets out a soft chuckle and winks. “Give it time.”

Philip sighs. “The problem is that they did understand the parable and it caused fights in the street–”

“Rioting.” Andrew emphasises. “Between Jews and Gentiles.”

Jesus lets out a soft hum as Philip carries on. “Leander has told us it’s getting worse every day. The prominent Hellenistic priest has changed his ways, which is good, but… When he abdicated his duties as priest and leader, others tried to fill the void, and so projects are going undone and people are just angry, and blaming each other for everything.”

Next to you, John has a concerned look over his features. You put a hand on his arm and gently squeeze, at which he smiles a bit wistfully at you. 

“It led to stealing,” Andrew says, “Fights in the streets… Many people are actually leaving their homes to escape the violence.” The final part of his sentence is a whisper. You can sense the shame he feels. 

Big James stands with his arms crossed. “That’s the violence You suggest sending us into?” 

Brief silence fills the room as all eyes turn to Jesus. “What part of the parable caused this fight to break out?”

“The people outside the city.” Philip answers. “The ones on the highways and the hedges, the last to be invited and the last to accept the invitation.”

Jesus draws a sharp breath. “That’s what I suspected.”

John leans forward. “Speaking of which - the highways and the hedges - does that actually refer to Gentiles?” 

A deep sigh leaves the Messiah. “He who has ears to hear, let him hear. We leave in the morning. Everyone go home and gather your things. We take to the highways and hedges before dawn.” 

The Disciples go to stand, and next to you, John still looks worried. As Jesus speaks to comfort Philip and Andrew, you whisper in John’s direction. 

“Hey, you alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just… Thinking.” he mutters. “How this might affect our ministry. What it might mean for us. If we must fight, then so be it. We’ve got strong men on our side who would be strong and capable in battle. I’m certain we’ll be able to snuff out this riot before it escalates even further.” 

Before you can reply that you don’t feel like the Messiah is aiming at such an approach, Jesus gets up from His seat, grabbing a few empty cups. “John, may I have a word?”

John picks up his head and looks up at his Teacher. “Yes, Rabbi.” He gives you a small smile as he gets up, and you nod at him. 

“Good luck, okay? I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

“Of course. Shalom, (Y/n), have a good night.”

“Sleep well, John. Shalom shalom.”

As you watch him head after Jesus, Who is currently rinsing out the cups, you let out a sigh. Being John’s childhood friend, you know better than anyone of his oftentimes brash nature out of sheer passion and dedication. 

The soft look in Jesus’ eyes, however, ensures you that He will take care of things. You smile at Him and stand to leave the house and find your own instead, giving Him a nod in greeting.

He mirrors it and turns to John, giving the former fisherman a special task.

_

The next morning, you’re sitting at Matthew’s old place, spending some time with Mary and Tamar as they work on their small business.

“Perhaps you should stay behind with us.” Tamar muses, “Help us out here.”

You shift and shake your head, smiling. “And miss out on all the tension? Hm, I’ve got a feeling that this is going to be a pivotal moment. The last thing I want is to be left out.”

As other followers of Jesus come trickling in, you check your belongings one final time - an extra tunic, a full waterskin, and another pair of sandals. On the bottom of your bag sits a stale piece of bread, so you toss it out. 

“Jesus is here,” Nathanael loudly announces, “Time to go!” 

Everyone moves to the door, momentarily gathering outside the building, where Jesus is patiently waiting for everyone. You follow the group as one of the final people to leave, putting the strap of your bag over your shoulder, getting ready to leave.

Before exiting the building, however, you halt on the threshold, turning to look inside the house one last time. Upon noticing John pouting as he is leaned against the wall, you frown slightly.

“Hey, John. What is going on? Come on, we have to go.”

He huffs and crosses his arms over his chest even tighter. “I’m fine, (Y/n). You wouldn’t get it.”

Planting a hand on your hip, you approach him. “What are you on about? By the way, where is your bag?”

John clicks his tongue, barely looking at you, muttering something under his breath that you cannot quite understand. 

“Sorry, I didn’t catch that.” 

He sighs. “Jesus wants me to stay here in Capernaum so I could wait for Simon.”

“He still hasn’t showed up, then?”

John lets out an exasperated sound. “No, he obviously hasn’t! Which is what frustrates me so much!”

“Why?”

“Because I want to come, too!” He looks at you with an expression that is nothing short of frustrated. “Everyone is getting to go out there with Jesus and witness perhaps a massive turning point in this ministry, and I get waiting duty! I want to go, too! I am also part of this group! He calls me beloved, so I must be important enough to see it too, right? I can’t stand it.”

You watch him for a long moment, slightly narrowing your eyes in thought. “Are you serious right now?" you question, although there is no reproach in your tone.

John grows restless under your scrutiny, exhaling sharply. 

“What, are you going to judge me for that?”

Pursing your lips, you hum. “John, son of Zebedee. This is not about you.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” he snaps. 

In spite of his anger, you remain calm. “I’ve known you forever, John. You’re always so keen on staying in the loop of things, which is a great trait to have. You are inquisitive, passionate, eager to learn. I admire that about you, my friend.”

His expression softens. “Huh, thank you for your kind words. But what does that have to do with anything?”

You step closer, putting a hand on his arm to comfort him. “Jesus loves you. He loves all of us. This entire ministry, however, does not revolve around us. About what we see, or about what we do, or about what He does for us. It is about what He does for them.” You nod at the door behind you, “For the world out there. For those who are weary, and wounded, and in need of healing.”

You pause, sighing.

“I know that it is difficult to possibly not be there when something pivotal happens, but it is not a given that we get to witness every single thing that will happen for the glory of Adonai. Besides, a lot has to happen behind the scenes. If Jesus did not need you to be here to wait for Simon, He wouldn’t have asked you to.”

“Jesus said that the success of this mission depends on Simon.”

You smile. “See, there you have it. Jesus can use you in many ways, even if you are not directly at His side.”

John lets out a sigh and lowers his gaze. Regretful about his outburst, he folds his hands in front of him. “I know.”

“Our plans do not always match up with His plans, but you trust Him regardless, hm?”

“I do. More than anything.”

Nodding, you pat his shoulder in a friendly manner. “Then we should not always rely on our own understanding of a situation. You might not be satisfied that you have to wait now, but in the long run, that feeling will make sense, and you will be glad that you indeed waited for Simon.”

The wry smile on John’s face makes place for a brighter one. He tilts his face back up, smiling.

“I hadn’t thought of it this way yet, (Y/n). Thank you for your perspective, that was very meaningful, and I can now see the value a bit better of Jesus asking me to stay behind.” He sighs, his smile slightly shrinking. “Although I am still a bit upset, how can I not be? You guys are going to get to the Decapolis! I wish I could be there right with you!”

“But Simon is necessary for the success of this trip, according to Jesus. Trust Him in this, too. Completely, okay?”

John sighs and nods. “Okay.” he says, exhaling. “Okay.”

You smile, stepping away from him. “Good.” you say, “I will see you soon, okay?”

He hums in acknowledgement and gives you a small wave, appearing way more positive now. “Thank you for your words. Safe travels, (Y/n). We will see each other before we know it.”

Nodding kindly, you agree to what he said and head after the others, finding them just outside the house. Big James puffs out his cheeks as he sees you and lets air escape slowly, knowing that you had to deal with a pouting John. However, you give him a small smile in turn. 

“Things will be alright with John,” you reassure his older brother, “He just needed another perspective on things to see that the task Jesus gave him is valuable in and of itself.”

“That is good to hear, (Y/n),” Big James states as you walk together into the outskirts of the village, following the group of Disciples. “Plus,” he adds, “It means we won’t have to deal with his nagging for a few hours at least.”

Chuckling, you shake your head, knowing that John feels useless regardless of the importance of his task, and bump a fist against James’ shoulder. 

“Tch, as if you nag less than he does. That you two haven’t physically chatted my ears off at this point is a miracle to say the least.”

James rolls his eyes, but cannot fight the grin that spreads over his face. 

“Fine, it means you won’t have to deal with half of the nagging.”

[coddlefish]

no copping out and saying none of them but also you HAVE to commit to only of them because we’re following the ryan murphy logic of one in ten are gay so only one of the apostles can be gay

make sure to reblog for a wider sample size!

[queenofrest]

Nathanael seems to be the most complex and challenging apostle to write about, but I love him and wish there were more requests for him.

[dolokhoded]

i regret the order i've had so far with the disciple hcs i don't know how i should go next. like should i post matthew with philip and nathanael and jesus with judas and jb and then thad james and thomas? and what about the rest non apostle characters? if i post lazarus and his sisters im doing it in one post. and then susanna and joanna ? and then maybe one post for the parents, mary and joseph, maybe mary's sister (jb's mother) elizabeth, salome and zebedee ? actually yeah that's probably exactly what im doing i take it back i like this plan that's what im doing. i don't know who goes next though. probably not james thad and thomas. not the non-apostles either let's get the main group finished with first . anon did ask for Judas...

[hopealoft]

Who is Jesus Christ?

1. The Son of God

Many Christians who understand their faith believe that Jesus Christ is the Son of God. The Holy Scriptures refer to Jesus as the Son of God several times. Let’s start from the conception of Jesus Christ.

Luke 1:30-35 (TLB)  “Don’t be frightened, Mary,” the angel told her, “for God has decided to wonderfully bless you! Very soon now, you will become pregnant and have a baby boy, and you are to name him ‘Jesus.’ He shall be very great and shall be called the Son of God. And the Lord God shall give him the throne of his ancestor David. And he shall reign over Israel forever; his Kingdom shall never end!”Mary asked the angel, “But how can I have a baby? I am a virgin.”The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit shall come upon you, and the power of God shall overshadow you; so the baby born to you will be utterly holy—the Son of God.

This is a famous story told every Christmas when we celebrate the birth of Jesus, but there’s a chance you haven’t heard of it yet. It’s not a mere story; it is History. Mary, a young virgin in Nazareth, Galilee, was engaged to a descendant of the Jewish King David, Joseph. One day, God sent Gabriel – the Angel, to deliver a message to Mary. This is the message seen in the scripture above. God had chosen Mary to bear Jesus Christ. You might ask how? Mary asked the same question! The angel revealed to Mary that she would conceive of Jesus Christ through the Holy Spirit. This is the only event of its kind recorded in history. Jesus Christ was born as the angel of God said, and He has changed the world to date. 

Before Jesus Christ started His ministry, His cousin, John the Baptist, had been announcing the coming of Christ.

John 1:23-28 (TLB)  He replied, “I am a voice from the barren wilderness, shouting as Isaiah prophesied, ‘Get ready for the coming of the Lord!’”Then those who were sent by the Pharisees asked him, “If you aren’t the Messiah or Elijah or the Prophet, what right do you have to baptize?”John told them, “I merely baptize with water, but right here in the crowd is someone you have never met, who will soon begin his ministry among you, and I am not even fit to be his slave.”This incident took place at Bethany, a village on the other side of the Jordan River where John was baptizing.

Although John the Baptist didn’t know who Christ was, he announced that Jesus was the Christ when He came to be baptised by John the Baptist.

John 1:29-34 (TLB)  The next day John saw Jesus coming toward him and said, “Look! There is the Lamb of God who takes away the world’s sin! He is the one I was talking about when I said, ‘Soon a man far greater than I am is coming, who existed long before me!’ I didn’t know he was the one, but I am here baptizing with water in order to point him out to the nation of Israel.”Then John told about seeing the Holy Spirit in the form of a dove descending from heaven and resting upon Jesus.“I didn’t know he was the one,” John said again, “but at the time God sent me to baptize he told me, ‘When you see the Holy Spirit descending and resting upon someone—he is the one you are looking for. He is the one who baptizes with the Holy Spirit.’ I saw it happen to this man, and I therefore testify that he is the Son of God.”

Several accounts of people calling Jesus the Son of God because of the supernatural things He did. 

Nathanael:

John 1:49 (TLB) Nathanael replied, “Sir, you are the Son of God—the King of Israel!”

Peter:

John 6:68-69 (TLB)  Simon Peter replied, “Master, to whom shall we go? You alone have the words that give eternal life, and we believe them and know you are the holy Son of God.”

Martha: 

John 11:27 (TLB)  “Yes, Master,” she told him. “I believe you are the Messiah, the Son of God, the one we have so long awaited.”

Paul the Apostle:

Romans 1:1-4 (TLB)  Paul, Jesus Christ’s slave, chosen to be a missionary, and sent out to preach God’s Good News. This Good News was promised long ago by God’s prophets in the Old Testament. It is the Good News about his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord, who came as a human baby, born into King David’s royal family line; and by being raised from the dead he was proved to be the mighty Son of God, with the holy nature of God himself. Hebrews 4:14 (TLB)  But Jesus the Son of God is our great High Priest who has gone to heaven itself to help us; therefore, let us never stop trusting him.

[andijaart]

+++🙏🏻God Bless🕊️+++

The Apostle Bartholomew (Nathanael)

MEMORIAL DAY JUNE 24

Holy apostles, pray to the merciful God, may He grant our souls forgiveness of sins.

💫International Orthodox Art Corporation Andcross May the blessing of the Lord be upon you!

https://andcrossartstore.etsy.com

[holystormfire]

John 1:43-51

'Come and see’ replied Philip

The Martyrdom of Saint Bartholomew,

Painted by Jusepe de Ribera (1591 - 1652),

Painted in 1634, Oil on canvas

@ National Gallery of Art, Washington

Gospel Reading

After Jesus had decided to leave for Galilee, he met Philip and said, ‘Follow me.’ Philip came from the same town, Bethsaida, as Andrew and Peter. Philip found Nathanael and said to him, ‘We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law, the one about whom the prophets wrote: he is Jesus son of Joseph, from Nazareth.’ ‘From Nazareth?’ said Nathanael ‘Can anything good come from that place?’ ‘Come and see’ replied Philip. When Jesus saw Nathanael coming he said of him, ‘There is an Israelite who deserves the name, incapable of deceit.’ ‘How do you know me?’ said Nathanael. ‘Before Philip came to call you,’ said Jesus ‘I saw you under the fig tree.’ Nathanael answered, ‘Rabbi, you are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel.’ Jesus replied, ‘You believe that just because I said: I saw you under the fig tree. You will see greater things than that.’ And then he added ‘I tell you most solemnly, you will see heaven laid open and, above the Son of Man, the angels of God ascending and descending.’

Reflection on the painting

Have you ever found yourself responding negatively to a suggestion of someone and then thinking further about it and having a change of mind and heart? I certainly have. Someone makes a suggestion as regards to parish life for example, and initially I respond with maybe little enthusiasm. I can only see the downsides, the problems, the complications, the demands it might make on time, etc... Then over time, I begin to see the suggestion in a different light. The words that that person spoke still linger in my mind and I mull it over. Then I come around to seeing that maybe there is something very worthwhile here after all.

That is exactly what happened to Nathaniel. Philip came up to him to share his enthusiasm for Jesus of Nazareth declaring that he and others had finally found the Messiah that the Jewish Scriptures had foretold. Nathanael’s initial response was dismissive, ‘From Nazareth? Can anything good come from there?’ We can indeed all be prone to dismissing people on the basis of where they are from or where they were brought up or their social background or even the colour of their skin or whatever. However, thanks to the gentle persistence of Philip, ‘Come and see’, Nathanael came to see Jesus and did change his mind! In fact he completely changed, as he gets on declaring ‘You are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel’. Jesus then responds that he hasn't seen anything yet!

The next time we meet Nathanael in this Gospel of John, he is to be among the group of disciples who went back fishing after the crucifixion of Jesus, to whom the risen Lord appeared. Nathanael did indeed see greater things...

When it comes to our relationship with the Lord, where we begin is not so important, because the Lord can always move us on, as long as we are open to being led by him.

Most Bible scholars believe Nathanael and Bartholomew were the same apostles. Our painting by Ribera is a profoundly moving work portraying the apostle's final moments before he is to be flayed alive. His body seemingly bursts through the surface of the canvas. His outstretched arms embrace a mystical light that illuminates his flesh. His piercing eyes, open mouth, and petitioning left hand convey an intense communion with the divine. He was a man who wasn't afraid to change his mind, even to the point of dying...

Article by Father Patrick van der Vorst

[frmartinshomiliesandreflections]

24th August >> Fr. Martin's Reflections/Homilies on Today's Mass Readings for The Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle (Inc. John 1:45-51): ‘You will see greater things’.

Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Gospel (Except USA) John 1:45-51 You will see heaven laid open, and the Son of Man.

Philip found Nathanael and said to him, ‘We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law, the one about whom the prophets wrote: he is Jesus son of Joseph, from Nazareth.’ ‘From Nazareth?’ said Nathanael ‘Can anything good come from that place?’ ‘Come and see’ replied Philip. When Jesus saw Nathanael coming he said of him, ‘There is an Israelite who deserves the name, incapable of deceit.’ ‘How do you know me?’ said Nathanael. ‘Before Philip came to call you,’ said Jesus ‘I saw you under the fig tree.’ Nathanael answered, ‘Rabbi, you are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel.’ Jesus replied, ‘You believe that just because I said: I saw you under the fig tree. You will see greater things than that.’ And then he added ‘I tell you most solemnly, you will see heaven laid open and, above the Son of Man, the angels of God ascending and descending.’

Gospel (USA) John 1:45-51 Here is a true child of Israel. There is no duplicity in him.

Philip found Nathanael and told him, “We have found the one about whom Moses wrote in the law, and also the prophets, Jesus son of Joseph, from Nazareth.” But Nathanael said to him, “Can anything good come from Nazareth?” Philip said to him, “Come and see.” Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him and said of him, “Here is a true child of Israel. There is no duplicity in him.” Nathanael said to him, “How do you know me?” Jesus answered and said to him, “Before Philip called you, I saw you under the fig tree.” Nathanael answered him, “Rabbi, you are the Son of God; you are the King of Israel.” Jesus answered and said to him, “Do you believe because I told you that I saw you under the fig tree? You will see greater things than this.” And he said to him, “Amen, amen, I say to you, you will see heaven opened and the angels of God ascending and descending on the Son of Man.”

Reflections (10)

(i) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew, one of the Twelve, is traditionally identified with Nathanael, who features in today’s gospel reading. Initially, Nathanael pours cold water on Philip’s witness to Jesus, whom Philip has come to recognize as the long-awaited Jewish Messiah. Nathanael’s refusal seems to be based on a kind of small town prejudice. We subsequently learn in John’s gospel that Nathanael was from Cana, which is not far from Nazareth. When Nathanael asks, ‘From Nathanael! Can anything good come from that place?’ he displays a dusty opinion of this neighbouring small village. Yet, Nathanael’s initial refusal of Philip’s witness to Jesus was not the end of Nathanael’s journey. He subsequently had a change of heart and responded to Philip’s invitation to come and see Jesus. However, Jesus had already seen Nathanael even before Nathanael’s initial dismissal of Philip’s witness. Jesus had a relationship with Nathanael before he had a relationship with Jesus and when Nathanael realized this he confessed his faith in Jesus as the long-awaited Jewish Messiah, ‘You are the King of Israel’. He was continuing to make progress on his journey of faith. Jesus assures him that he will make further progress into the future; he will see ‘greater things’. He will come to recognize Jesus as the meeting place of heaven and earth, the one on whom the angels of God are ascending and descending. Nathanael’s journey of faith can speak to our own journey. The Lord is relating to us even when we are not relating to him. Our initial resistance to the Lord’s call need never have the last word. He continues to call us to come and see. If we respond in any way to the Lord’s call, he will affirm us in our journey and he will continue to open up new horizons on for us our journey of faith, until we come to see and appreciate him as God with us, the one through whom God’s love comes to us.

And/Or

(ii) Feast of St Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew has traditionally been identified with Nathanael who features in this morning’s gospel reading. He is portrayed in that reading as someone who journeyed in a very short time from great scepticism to great faith. His initial response to Philip’s witness to Jesus as the long-awaited Jewish Messiah was to ask, ‘Can anything good come from Nazareth?’ Elsewhere in John’s gospel we are told that Nathanael was from Cana in Galilee. Cana was not that far from Nazareth, and wasn’t all that different from Nazareth, but, obviously the people of Cana did not think much of the people of Nazareth. Philip was not put off by Nathanael’s apparent resistance; he simply said, ‘Come and see’, and in fairness to Nathanael, he came and saw. Jesus was not put off either by Nathanael’s resistance, because as soon as he saw Nathanael he complemented him, ‘There is an Israelite who deserves the name incapable of deceit. It was Jesus’ positive reception of Nathanael which brought Nathanael to make his great act of faith, ‘Rabbi, you are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel’. The gospel reading suggests that Jesus could look beyond the negative in people to see and to name what was positive. The Lord sees and names the good in us, and if we could become more aware of how the Lord regards us, we too, like Nathanael, would grow in faith.

And/Or

(iii) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Today we celebrate the feast of St Bartholomew. He has been traditionally identified with Nathanael who features in this morning’s gospel reading. Nathanael dismissed Philip’s initial witness to Jesus with the dismissive words, ‘Can anything good come from Nazareth?’ Nathanael had a dusty opinion of Nazareth and had no expectations of it. In this regard, he was probably not alone. Yet, in response to Philip’s persistence, Nathanael did make his way to Jesus. Upon seeing Nathanael Jesus paid him a high compliment. In spite of the fact that Nathanael had been dismissive of Jesus initially, Jesus was anything but dismissive of Nathanael. This is a reminder to us that the Lord is always generous in his way of perceiving us. Even when we are less than generous towards him, he remains generous towards us. The Lord’s generous vision of Nathanael changed Nathanael in some way. From initially dismissing Jesus, he went on to confess him as the Son of God and King of Israel. Jesus’ generous vision of Nathanael brought out the best in him, and can bring out the best in us. In a similar way, when we are generous in our way of seeing and relating to others, we too can help bring out the best in them. That is our calling as followers of the Lord who is full of grace and truth.

And/Or

(iv) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

We know very little about Saint Bartholomew, but he has been traditionally identified with Nathanael who features in today’s gospel reading. According to the last chapter of John’s gospel, Nathanael was from Cana in Galilee, which was not very far from Nazareth and much the same kind of place. Yet, when Philip announces to him that they identified Jesus of Nazareth as the long-awaited Jewish Messiah, Nathanael responds by asking ‘Can anything good come from that place?’ An example perhaps of small town rivalry! Nathanael started off dismissing Jesus on the basis of where Jesus was from. However, once Nathanael met Jesus for himself, his view of Jesus completely changed. He declared in Jesus’ presence, ‘You are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel’. The gospel reading suggests that there is no substitute for a personal encounter with Jesus. Without that personal encounter, Nathanael would have continued to dismiss Jesus outright. Through Philip, the Lord called Nathanael to ‘come and see’. It is because he came and saw, and met with Jesus for himself, that Nathanael ceased to be a sceptic and became a disciple. The Lord is constantly calling on us to ‘come and see’, to meet with him in a very personal way, one to one, rather than just knowing about him by hearsay.

And/Or

(v) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew is listed as one of the twelve apostles. He has tended to be identified with Nathanael who features in this morning’s gospel reading. Nathanael starts off being very sceptical about Jesus, ‘Can anything good come from that place – Nazareth?’ However, he finishes by making a great confession of faith, ‘Rabbi, you are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel’. Yet Jesus goes on to tell him that although he has journeyed from scepticism to faith he is still only at the beginning of his journey of faith. Jesus promises him, ‘You will see greater things... You will see heaven laid open and, above the Son of Man, the angels of God ascending and descending’. Nathanael will eventually come to see Jesus as the meeting point of heaven and earth, the one in whom God has taken flesh. Nathanael had made great progress on the journey of faith but he will make even further progress. His initial movement beyond scepticism was inspired by the witness of one of the disciples of Jesus, Philip, who shared his faith with Nathanael and encouraged him to meet Jesus in spite of his scepticism. We are all on a journey of faith. On that journey there may be a moment or many moments of scepticism. Yet, the Lord keeps calling out to us and promises us that we will see greater things. If that is to come to pass, we need people like Philip to support us on every step of our faith journey and we in turn need to be a Philip to others on their faith journey.

And/Or

(vi) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew has been traditionally identified with Nathanael who features in our gospel reading this morning. Jesus pays him a lovely compliment, ‘Here is an Israelite, incapable of deceit’ or ‘in whom there is no deceit’. Jesus admired his openness and honesty. Even his dusty opinion about Nazareth, ‘Can anything good come out of Nazareth?’ was, at least, an honest opinion; it was what he believed. Nathanael went on to recognize that his honest opinion about Nazareth was a mistaken one. He came to see that Jesus from Nazareth was none other than the Son of God and the King of Israel. It takes a generosity of heart and spirit to recognize when we have got it wrong, to recognize that our opinion of some person or place has been shaped by our prejudices rather than by reality. Nathanael’s honesty and generosity of heart can be an inspired to us on this his feast day. The final word of the gospel reading, however, is given to Jesus, not to Nathanael. It takes the form of that wonderful promise Jesus makes to him, ‘You will see greater things... You will see heaven laid open and, above the Son of Man, the angels of God ascending and descending’. We may have a certain insight into Jesus, a certain appreciation of him, like Nathanael, but Jesus assures us that there is so much more to see and appreciate. In our relationship with Jesus, we are always only towards the beginning of our journey. There are always ‘greater things’ to see.

And/Or

(vii) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew is listed as one of the twelve apostles. He is traditionally identified with the figure of Nathanael who features in this morning’s gospel reading. When Philip shared with Nathanael his emerging faith in Jesus of Nazareth, Nathanael dismissed it with the remark, ‘can anything good come from Nazareth?’ Yet, this dismissive, sceptical attitude would not go on to define Nathanael. There was some little openness in him, because when Philip went on to say to him, ‘Come and see’, Nathanael did come and he saw for himself. When Jesus saw Nathanael, he drew attention not to his initial dismissive attitude but to his openness, ‘an Israelite who deserves the name, incapable of deceit’. Jesus admired his honesty; there was no pretence in him. As a result of his meeting with Jesus, Nathanael goes on to make his confession of faith in Jesus of Nazareth, ‘you are the Son of God, you are the King of Israel’. Nathanael had moved from scepticism to faith. Yet, Jesus assures him that he is still only at the beginning of his journey; he has only begun to see. Jesus promises him, ‘You will see greater things... you will see heaven laid open and, above the Son of Man, the angels of God ascending and descending’. He will come to recognize Jesus as the meeting point of heaven and earth, as God in human form. Like Nathanael, we are all on a journey. The Lord invites us to ‘come and see’, no matter where we are on that journey, and, if we do manage to see something of the Lord, he promises us that one day we will see greater things than what we now see.

And/Or

(viii) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew, who is only mentioned in the gospels of Matthew, Mark and Luke, is often identified with Nathanael who only features in the gospel of John. One of the striking aspects of the portrayal of Nathanael in this morning’s gospel reading is his openness and willingness to change for the better. When Philip tries to share with Nathanael his emerging faith in Jesus as the Jewish Messiah, Nathanael initially dismisses Jesus out of hand on the basis of where Jesus is from. However, when Philip persists, Nathanael goes with Philip to meet Jesus. Then when Jesus addresses him as a person incapable of deceit, Nathanael makes a great confession of faith in Jesus, ‘You are the Son of God; you are the King of Israel’. Jesus reminds him that he is not yet at the end of his faith journey; he has only begun to see, ‘you will see greater things’. Yet, we sense that Nathanael, having travelled so far in such a short time, will continue to make progress. He is an encouragement to us all that change for the better is always possible, for all of us. We all have the potential to grow in our relationship with the Lord and to allow him to shape our lives ever more fully. Nathanael would not have made the progress he made without the initiative that the Lord took towards him, initially through the person of Philip and then in a more direct and personal way. The Lord continues to take the same initiative towards us; he continues to call us into a deeper relationship with himself; he never gives up on us; he knocks on our door in various ways. All he asks is that we have that same openness to respond to the Lord’s initiative towards us that Nathanael had. If we have that openness, then, like Nathanael, we too will change for the better, we will begin to see greater things.

And/Or

(ix) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Bartholomew is mentioned in the list of the twelve apostles in the gospels. He is traditionally identified with Nathanael in today’s gospel reading from John. Nathanael was initially very dismissive of Jesus, wondering if anything good could come from the village of Nazareth. He poured cold water on Philip’s witness to his faith, ‘We have found the one Moses wrote about in the Law...’ Yet there was something about Philip’s witness which prompted Nathanael to go with him when Philip said, ‘Come and see’. Nathanael’s own personal encounter with Jesus led him from his initial dismissive attitude to a sharing in Philip’s faith, ‘You are the son of God, you are the King of Israel’. This was still only the beginning of Nathanael’s journey. Jesus informs him that he will see greater things. Yet, he had already come a long way from his initial scepticism. The story of Nathanael in today’s gospel reading reminds us that faith is a journey of coming to see the Lord more clearly and of following the Lord more wholeheartedly. Even if, like Nathanael, we start in a very inauspicious place, a place of doubt and scepticism, the Lord continues to call us, and he calls us in and through each other, as he called Nathanael through Philip. No matter where we are on this faith journey, the Lord continues to say to us, what he said to Nathanael, ‘you will see greater things’. We are always on the way until that eternal day when we see the Lord face to face.

And/Or

(x) Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

The reason we read this gospel reading featuring Nathanael on the feast of Saint Bartholomew is because they have been traditionally regarded as the same person. There is something quite attractive about the portrayal of Nathanael in that gospel reading. His initial response to Philip’s breathless witness to Jesus seems very gruff and dismissive, ‘Can anything good come from Nazareth?’ We are all familiar with the tendency to dismiss someone on the grounds of where they come from or who their parents are. Prejudice is always with us and can even lurk in our own hearts. Yet, Nathanael didn’t allow himself to get stuck in his prejudice. He thought better of his initial dismissal of Jesus and he went on to respond to Philip’s gentle invitation to come and see Jesus. We are being reminded that it is not where we start that matters but where we end up. We are all capable of having a change of mind and heart for the better, especially when it comes to our relationship with the Lord. This freedom to move to a better place is a quality that Jesus recognized in Nathanael and appreciated. When he sees Nathanael coming towards him, he pays him a wonderful compliment, identifying him as a man ‘incapable of deceit’. Where we are now is more important to the Lord than where we have been in the past. Once Jesus engaged Nathanael in conversation, he made further progress, publicly declaring Jesus to be ‘the Son of God’ and ‘the King of Israel’. He has come a long way from where he started; from dismissing Jesus on the basis of his home village, he now confesses him in a striking way. The Lord invites all of us to keep travelling that same journey of deepening our relationship with him. Wherever we are on that journey, he will say to us what he went on to say to Nathanael, ‘you will see great things’. Nathanael still had a long way to go on his journey towards Jesus and that is true of us all. The journey of coming to Jesus, seeing him with our heart and mind, staying with him and witnessing to him is a life-long journey. It is one of the great journeys of life and the Lord travels it with us, constantly calling us to come further and to see more.

Fr. Martin Hogan.

[roman-catholic-mass-readings]

5th April >> Mass Readings (Except USA)

Easter Friday 

(Liturgical Colour: White. Year: B(II))

First Reading

Acts of the Apostles 4:1-12

The name of Jesus Christ is the only one by which we can be saved.

While Peter and John were talking to the people the priests came up to them, accompanied by the captain of the Temple and the Sadducees. They were extremely annoyed at their teaching the people the doctrine of the resurrection from the dead by proclaiming the resurrection of Jesus. They arrested them, but as it was already late, they held them till the next day. But many of those who had listened to their message became believers, the total number of whom had now risen to something like five thousand.

The next day the rulers, elders and scribes had a meeting in Jerusalem with Annas the high priest, Caiaphas, Jonathan, Alexander and all the members of the high-priestly families. They made the prisoners stand in the middle and began to interrogate them, ‘By what power, and by whose name have you men done this?’ Then Peter, filled with the Holy Spirit, addressed them, ‘Rulers of the people, and elders! If you are questioning us today about an act of kindness to a cripple, and asking us how he was healed, then I am glad to tell you all, and would indeed be glad to tell the whole people of Israel, that it was by the name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, the one you crucified, whom God raised from the dead, by this name and by no other that this man is able to stand up perfectly healthy, here in your presence, today. This is the stone rejected by you the builders, but which has proved to be the keystone. For of all the names in the world given to men, this is the only one by which we can be saved.’

The Word of the Lord

R/ Thanks be to God.

Responsorial Psalm

Psalm 117(118):1-2,4,22-27

R/ The stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone. or R/ Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

Give thanks to the Lord for he is good, for his love has no end. Let the sons of Israel say: ‘His love has no end.’ Let those who fear the Lord say: ‘His love has no end.’

R/ The stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone. or R/ Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

The stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone. This is the work of the Lord,

a marvel in our eyes. This day was made by the Lord; we rejoice and are glad.

R/ The stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone. or R/ Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

O Lord, grant us salvation; O Lord, grant success. Blessed in the name of the Lord is he who comes. We bless you from the house of the Lord; the Lord God is our light.

R/ The stone which the builders rejected has become the corner stone. or R/ Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

Sequence

Victimae Paschali Laudes

Christians, to the Paschal Victim offer sacrifice and praise. The sheep are ransomed by the Lamb; and Christ, the undefiled, hath sinners to his Father reconciled. Death with life contended: combat strangely ended! Life’s own Champion, slain, yet lives to reign.

Tell us, Mary: say what thou didst see upon the way.

The tomb the Living did enclose; I saw Christ’s glory as he rose!

The angels there attesting;

shroud with grave-clothes resting.

Christ, my hope, has risen: he goes before you into Galilee. That Christ is truly risen from the dead we know. Victorious king, thy mercy show!

Gospel Acclamation

Psalm 117:24

Alleluia, alleluia! This day was made by the Lord: we rejoice and are glad. Alleluia!

Gospel

John 21:1-14

Jesus stepped forward, took the bread and gave it to them, and the same with the fish.

Jesus showed himself again to the disciples. It was by the Sea of Tiberias, and it happened like this: Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathanael from Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee and two more of his disciples were together. Simon Peter said, ‘I’m going fishing.’ They replied, ‘We’ll come with you.’ They went out and got into the boat but caught nothing that night.

It was light by now and there stood Jesus on the shore, though the disciples did not realise that it was Jesus. Jesus called out, ‘Have you caught anything, friends?’ And when they answered, ‘No’, he said, ‘Throw the net out to starboard and you’ll find something.’ So they dropped the net, and there were so many fish that they could not haul it in. The disciple Jesus loved said to Peter, ‘It is the Lord.’ At these words ‘It is the Lord’, Simon Peter, who had practically nothing on, wrapped his cloak round him and jumped into the water. The other disciples came on in the boat, towing the net and the fish; they were only about a hundred yards from land.

As soon as they came ashore they saw that there was some bread there, and a charcoal fire with fish cooking on it. Jesus said, ‘Bring some of the fish you have just caught.’ Simon Peter went aboard and dragged the net to the shore, full of big fish, one hundred and fifty-three of them; and in spite of there being so many the net was not broken. Jesus said to them, ‘Come and have breakfast.’ None of the disciples was bold enough to ask, ‘Who are you?’; they knew quite well it was the Lord. Jesus then stepped forward, took the bread and gave it to them, and the same with the fish. This was the third time that Jesus showed himself to the disciples after rising from the dead.

The Gospel of the Lord

R/ Praise to you, Lord Jesus Christ.

[sassystudent-me]

Reasoning, ranting, and commentary on what their talent would be, put it in the tags.

[myremnantarmy]

𝐀𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝟐𝟒, 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑

Feast of Saint Bartholomew, Apostle

Gospel Jn 1:45-51

Philip found Nathanael and told him,

"We have found the one about whom Moses wrote in the law,

and also the prophets, Jesus son of Joseph, from Nazareth."

But Nathanael said to him,

"Can anything good come from Nazareth?"

Philip said to him, "Come and see."

Jesus saw Nathanael coming toward him and said of him,

"Here is a true child of Israel.

There is no duplicity in him."

Nathanael said to him, "How do you know me?"

Jesus answered and said to him,

"Before Philip called you, I saw you under the fig tree."

Nathanael answered him,

"Rabbi, you are the Son of God; you are the King of Israel."

Jesus answered and said to him,

"Do you believe

because I told you that I saw you under the fig tree?

You will see greater things than this."

And he said to him, "Amen, amen, I say to you,

you will see heaven opened and the angels of God

ascending and descending on the Son of Man."

[the-chosen-fanfiction]

John the Apostle | Muse | Romantic

Dialogue prompt: "Your hair is so messy." - "Oh, please. It's because you can't stop touching it."

Requested: Yes

In order for you to be able to draw John properly, his hair just has to be perfect.

The charcoal slides against the parchment smoothly, carefully pressured by your precise hand to leave behind fine lines without the charred wood snapping underneath it. You trace your tongue over your bottom lip as you apply the final details, your gaze flicking up and down every few moments to see if you’re still on the right track, but your state of concentration is soon broken by a sudden voice behind you.

“Are you done yet?”

For the third time in ten minutes, Nathanael questions how far along you are, and does so in the most Nathanael-fashion possible. In spite of it being not the first time, it startles you nevertheless, and you close your eyes in annoyance as a small stripe of charcoal now sits obnoxiously inside the eye, where you had been working on the pupil. 

“Thank you for that, Nath.” you sigh exasperatedly, voice laced with sarcasm, knowing that thumbing away the mistake will lead to nothing but an awful smudge, and you momentarily stare at the portrait you had been sketching. You had managed to capture the warm features of Jesus’ face, had given His beard just the right amount of volume and you were more than happy with the shape of His nose, but now, the kindness of His eyes falls flat because of an ugly thick stripe of charcoal. 

“Sorry about that.” Nathanael quips, “Anyways, do you think you can draw me one of those as well?”

If glares could kill, Nathanael would have met his demise the moment you set eyes on him. He takes your narrowed eyes for his sign to leave, showing his palms in defence. “You don’t have to do it right now, no worries at all.” He backs off before you’re even able to voice the thought that the former architect wouldn’t be able to sit still for that long anyways.

Inhaling sharply, you turn your gaze up to Jesus, Who gives you a small smile.

“I’m sorry, Master,” you sigh, “It was going so well, I was so proud of how it was turning out. I will of course make You a new portrait, and I will try my very best to capture the same details as I did in this previous–”

Jesus holds out His hand. “Nonsense, (Y/n), I am sure it is beautiful. Let Me take a look.” You reluctantly hand Him the piece of parchment and He inspects it, drinking in every little bit of the drawing. 

“I-I know it is likely not what I could have–”

“It is beautiful, (Y/n). Thank you very much, I love it!”

Your eyes widen. “Really?”

Jesus nods, then lets his gaze go to someone who is coming up behind you. “Really. See, there are more people who would like to have their portraits drawn.”

Your smile falls. “I thought I was pretty clear, Nathanael, that I am not in the mood to–”

Upon pivoting and being about to give Nathanael a piece of your mind, you come face to face with nobody less than John.

The very man you’ve been sketching in secret in your notebook for the past weeks.

The former fisherman who has started to become a muse of sorts ever since you had a romantic dream about him two months ago.

The younger son of Zebedee whom you’ve been sweet on for a while now. 

The one who sends butterflies through your entire system. 

“John, hi!” you somehow manage to greet him, “Uh, shalom, how are you?”

John the Beloved smiles sweetly. “I am doing well, (Y/n), thank you. How about you?”

You nod and gulp in an attempt to get rid of the dryness of your throat, but to no avail. “I’m good!” you squeal, a bit too high-pitched for your liking, “I just made a sketch of Jesus.”

With his eyebrows raised in curiosity, John looks at the piece of parchment in Jesus’ hands. The Messiah hands it to him so that he can inspect it closer, and your face flushes whilst he scrutinises it. 

“This is so good, (Y/n), you are very talented!”

Flustered, you lower your gaze. “Thanks, I’m trying my very best to get better at it.”

John hums and hands back the parchment to Jesus, Who stands and gives you another word of thanks before walking off, heading for his tent where He finds His leather backpack to safely tuck away the drawing. 

“Would you…” John rubs his neck, “Would you be open to drawing me as well? I would like to give my eema some sort of gift to remember me by.”

The thoughtful comment warms your heart. 

“Sure,” you breathe, “Right now?”

His hair bounces as he nods, and you look at it. Chewing your lip, you can already see a few loose strands that need to be tucked into place. 

“Would you like me to sit anywhere in particular?”

You gesture towards a fallen log on the edge of camp. “How about there?” you propose, and John hums in agreement.

“Sounds like a great plan. I’ll bring you a chair, hold on.”

The fisherman carries a small stool over to the log, so that both of you can get comfortable. With the change in light, you recognise that you take another angle than the one you had drawn Jesus in, and you shift a little closer to the younger son of Zebedee. 

“Want me to sit here?” 

You hum. “Please.” He puts the stool down for you to position properly. You drag it over to the right position and reach for your bag.

John takes a seat on the log so that you aren’t looking right into the sun and pulls a rather prideful face, puffing out his chest, straightening his back. “How about this pose?” he suggests, causing you to snort a laugh. 

“You aren’t going to keep that up for long, trust me.”

“Why not?” John asks whilst you take an unwritten sheet of parchment from your bag and you rummage through your tools to find a proper bit of charcoal to begin with. 

You nod towards Nathanael, who is busy chatting with Thaddeus a little away. “I had him as my model not too long ago, and he could only sit like that for five minutes before his muscles got tired.” John flexes his arms and gives you a determined look. “Well, I am used to heavy labour, so I can take it!” The sight makes you flush and you clear your throat, looking away. John relaxes his body and smiles, thinking of the pink tinge on your cheeks as adorable. 

“Just… Take on a pose that you can maintain for about forty to fifty minutes.”

His eyes widen. “Forty to fifty– Right, okay. Art takes time.”

You smile and nod, waiting for the fisherman to poise himself in such a way that does not strain him yet is interesting enough to make a drawing of. He leans a hand on the log he is sitting on, puts his legs a little further apart and turns his gaze to you. The way his dreamy eyes seem to drill into you as he stares nearly makes you snap your piece of charcoal between your fingers. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” you abashedly query. 

John shrugs. “Well, then it will seem like I’m looking right at the viewer.”

In an attempt to gather yourself, you inhale through your nose and calmly exhale right after, shifting in your seated position. 

You hold out your thumb in an attempt to somewhat figure out the proportions, and make a rough outline of the shape of his head. Every time you cast your eyes back up at him, your heart skips a beat, the intensity of his gaze making you flustered. 

“I’ll… I’ll need to fix your hair a little.” you say. 

John smiles. “By all means.” 

He sits still as you card your fingers through the thick, dark brown locks. The moment you make contact with it, your breath hitches, and you are not brave enough to let your focus go down to John, who is gently gazing at you. 

“That’s better.” you state when it’s shaped into a better model, sitting back. “Okay, let’s see…”

You sketch the first outlines of his features as well as the shape of the mop of curls that sits untamed on his head. Squinting, you roughly sketch where his beard goes and try to get the broadness of his neck and shoulders right, and John flicks his tongue over his lips, giving you an amused look. 

“You’re cute when you’re concentrated.”

“Huh?” Having missed his words, you look up at him a bit confused. “What was that?”

John gives you a tight-lipped smile, suddenly self-conscious, and shakes his head. “Nothing.” The motion causes his hair to spring back where it had been before. 

Clicking your tongue, you reach over to it again and softly play with it in the hopes of tucking it into just the right place. John enjoys the feeling of your fingers against his scalp, letting out a small hum. “Everything okay?”

You nod and lean away again so that you can resume your work, trying to calm your racing heart down, which is affected by his proximity. Although the fisherman does not smell clean – you’re certain that you don’t smell amazing either during this long time on the road – you bask in his scent regardless. It is comforting, and you suddenly wonder how things would be between you if he knew what you felt for him.

With a slightly unsteady hand, you draw him, and slide the charcoal against the parchment in just the right places. Studying people in this way never fails to make you amazed at how incredibly complex God’s creation is, each face different from the other. Staring into the eyes of your crush is an added bonus to this particular sketch.

“How is it coming along?” 

His kind demeanour puts you at ease. Your gaze meets John’s and you smile. “Slowly but surely. Be patient, now. Here, hold on.” Once again, you find yourself reaching forward to get some of his curls to sit in a prettier way, and he chuckles. 

“I shouldn’t rush art, sorry.”

With a pleasant hum, you continue your drawing. 

In relative silence, you get down to the largest features quite easily, and you’re soon already working on the smaller details, swapping between different pieces of charcoal that you carry in your bag. At some point, you carve a chunk of charred wood into a tiny, fragile point with your pocket knife in order to capture each and every curl to your best ability. 

John sits there, awaiting your results yet not pushing you to hurry, like Nathanael had done. Every few moments, you find yourself looking up into his eyes and deem it almost intimate. Your tummy swirls with butterflies more and more every passing second, and you wish that you would never finish this drawing, just to keep him in front of you for longer.

Watching you in this way makes John almost abashed, your scrutiny intense yet adoring in a way that you so delicately add details here and there, showing that you’re truly studying him. Your concentrated state is nothing short of adorable. Something in his gut drops, resembling disappointment, that you hadn’t heard him tell you that he thinks you look cute a while ago. Perhaps he should repeat himself – or maybe that he shouldn’t, for he doesn’t want to make a fool out of himself–

A gust of wind pulls both you and John out of your focused state, and you can barely hold onto the piece of parchment that threatens to escape. You puff some air from your lungs out of relief and smile at the younger son of Zebedee, who grins back at you with an equal beam.

“That was a close call.”

Humming in acknowledgement, you gaze at him again, shaking your head in disbelief at the sight of his curls all across his forehead, casting way different shadows over his face than they had done before. 

“Ugh, John, your hair is so messy!” you quip, swiping a finger over his forehead from left to right in the hopes to somewhat push it back into place.

John rolls his eyes with a smirk. “Oh, please. It’s because you can’t stop touching it!” 

“The wind keeps messing it up, and I just need to draw it perfectly. I cannot help that your hair is just so… Inviting! Captivating!”

“Says who?”

“Says me! And how am I supposed to properly get it on here if it keeps bouncing out of place?”

John chews on the inside of his cheek to fight his spreading smile as the warmth of your index finger causes a thousand butterflies to erupt into his stomach. 

“There.” You say once you’re satisfied with how his curls are sitting. Turning back to your sketch, John feels a pang of disappointment that you’ve stopped touching him.

“(Y/n), I’ve been meaning to tell you something.” His heart pounds against his chest as he says the words. 

With a questioning gaze, you look up from your drawing. “Is it important, can it wait for a few moments? I’m nearly done with this.” 

His gut spins and he nods a bit, and he watches your hand as it slides the charcoal over the paper, skilled, talented. 

The next time it moves up to touch his hair, John decides right then and there, he will most certainly– He doesn’t have a long time to overthink his plans when you put down your charcoal again in order to once again adjust his dark locks, tucking and pushing the strands in the places you deem right so that you can have a great–

John catches your wrist in his hand and brings it down from his forehead. Whilst maintaining eye-contact, he presses a light kiss onto the back of your fingers, smiling a bit shyly with flushed cheeks. 

Shocked, you freeze in your spot. Upon seeing your reaction, John releases your hand and shakes his head apologetically. “Oh, no, I’m–I’m so sorry, (Y/n), I didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that, and–”

Finding your voice, you whisper his name. “John,” you mutter, cupping his face with that same hand. He leans into it without realising it and smiles. “It’s okay. Does it… Does this mean that you like me?”

He lightly laughs and nods, biting his bottom lip in thought. “Very much,” he admits, but his smile falls. “I… I didn’t mean to pressure you by kissing your hand there. It was not proper of me, and I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you repeat, softer this time, and you flick your gaze down to your sketch momentarily. “The drawing is nearly done. Would you like me to finish it now?”

With eyes that glitter in amusement, John puffs out his cheeks and lets air escape slowly before shaking his head, taking your other hand in his as well. 

“Perhaps we should discuss other things first. You can always tame my hair another time. Would you like to take a walk whilst we talk over things?”

You smile and nod, allowing him to help you up by taking his hand. 

Carefully folding the unfinished sketch, you put it neatly into your bag to complete later. 

You’re certain it will not be the only drawing you will ever make of him.