#apologies for oversharing. needed to get this all out

[minterim]

just had my dad admit to me that even though he's fully aware of how much his alcoholism hurts me and my mum and brother he refuses to quit drinking outright because he likes it. cool

[httpiastri]

as happy as i am for lissie and marcus (even though I knew they were already together because I literally watched them make out with my own two eyes) it was honestly my last straw. I’m so tired of seeing everybody on my social feeds happy and in relationships when I’ve just had the worst week of my life and have basically given up on falling in love because if I can’t even drive how am I going to go to places where I’ll meet people?!?!? i have spent every Valentine’s Day alone while my friends go on elaborate dates and I’m just so so tired

not the make out sesh 😩 oh to see them with my own two eyes irl... what a pretty sight it would be

this got quite personal and hit a little too close to home so im putting a lil keep reading thing

love :(( i’m truly sorry you feel this way... but god i felt this ask so much... first of all, i'm really sorry about you having a bad week. it's completely fine to feel the way you're feeling, it must really suck, but i'm sure you'll get the license and you'll be driving shortly!! i am keeping my fingers crossed for you ❤️

i’ve always been very calm about relationships and love, very much “i’m not in a rush” and “it’ll come when it’s time”. i’ve always been a hopeless romantic but i haven’t been stressed about it – i’ve always been so busy that i haven’t really had time for love, and i've been okay with hearing about friends and their great love lives while i've spent pretty much every weekend and holiday alone at home. but… eventually, it becomes exhausting, you know? when falling in love for real just seems so far away and like something so hard to achieve in some way....

i also kind of feel you on the driving part... i decided not to get my license for a bunch of reasons, and idk how i'll get around without driving... but also as i am still living with my parents, it just seems impossible to meet someone, because where would i bring them? home to meet my snooping parents?? no way

i think we just gotta hold on to the hope that when it is the right time, it will happen. i don't believe in the whole "don't rush it" thing, i think that we're all allowed to seek and chase love if we want to, but i also think it's okay to take a step back and just breathe and be okay with the situation. unfortunately, our current day society is so formed around relationships, soft launches and hard launches and dinner date pics on insta and public proposal videos, that i feel like the pressure easily gets overwhelming. there's also something in the way that people think other people's love lives is any of their business, like friends and relatives asking me why i don't have a boyfriend, as if a partner is something i need to live my life? surely it would make it better, but i don't need to be reminded and hurt yet again over the fact that i'm alone, when i'm just trying to move on in life...

i'm trying to stay patient, open to any opportunity, and remembering that social media is merely a highlight reel and not reality. i hope you too can find peace in remembering that things will get better, we just have to work through this first. we will get through it and come out stronger on the other side. darling, if you ever need something from me, want to rant, or anything else, know that my messages and inbox are always open 💗

[medicinemane]

I'm still mad about the friend of mine who got harassed off of here. Any time I see their old url, it feels really nice to see it again, but then I remember why they're not using it anymore

Didn't do a damn thing wrong, just annoyed some people enough they started a harassment campaign. They literally said as much, I'm not just making that up. Every last thing they supposedly did wrong either wasn't wrong period, was twisting their words hardcore, or was a situation where they didn't realize the context of a phrase they were using a tiny bit of gentle correction was enough to make them go "oh shit, I didn't realize that" and change (but still get harassed even though they literally had already changed)

Accused of all kind of horrible shit over fucking nothing, people just like having an acceptable target and are a bit over eager to buy into slander that if you actually know the person is demonstrably false

I still talk to them of course, but the past pisses me off

[pnutbutter-n-j-elyy]

They Unknowingly Bring Up and Insecurity| Seungmin Pt2

Pt1 Pt3

Seungmin sat in the living room with the guys while you were in the kitchen with Lee Know preparing something for your guy's weekly hangout. You all decided on playing monopoly together, with you and Seungmin partnering up.

Bangchan carefully set up the board while Felix was handing out the money.

"Seungmin hyung." Jeongin asked as he handed his elder the thimble to him.

"Is Y/N okay? She's been really quiet. She won't even talk to me." Jeongin's face was droopy as he stuck his lip out. "I was wondering if she was upset about something?"

Seungmin took a breath and spoke quietly. His voice soft and rather sad.

"I think I said something that hurt her feelings really bad." His voice was starting to wobble a bit, and that told Jeongin all he needed to know.

"Did you say sorry?"

Seungmin nodded and his cheeks puffed out slightly as he pouted. "She said she was okay but I don't believe her."

Jeongin grabbed the hat and messed with it. "Well, what did you say to her?" He inquired.

Seungmin pulled out his phone and scrolled up to his texts with you. Which it didn't take long for him to scroll up because you hadn't been texting him as often. He only heard from you for important or urgent things, and he was missing the little random blurbs of somewhat unnecessary - but entirely endearing - information about what you were doing.

He handed his phone to Jeongin and the maknae quickly read it through.

"Hyung, you know why Y/N and her last boyfriend broke up right...?"

Seungmin shook his head and Jeongin opened his mouth to speak but you walked in with Minho with a tray of snacks.

"Did Minho teach you how to make something new?" Chan asked you. Seungmin could tell the rest of the guys had picked up on your odd silence, but you nodded.

"Kinda...he taught me how to set a charcuterie board. It's pretty."

You set it down and Jisung immediately went to go grab something.

"MMM Y/N THIS IS SO GOOD!!" He popped a piece of cheese into his mouth and his cheeks puffed up. "You need to teach me now!!"

The effort Jisung had given to get you to respond was in vain.

"Jiji, I just grabbed the cheese from a package..."

The wide eyed quokka boy scratched his neck. "Oh um. Its still good though."

Throughout the first thirty minutes of you guys playing, minimal conversation was made and Seungmin was feeling antsy.

He missed your voice.

When you stood up to go to the bathroom and go restock the snack supply all the guys turned to you.

"Seungmin apologize. I miss my baby girl..." Jisung whined.

Seungmin deadpanned and Jisung frowned. "What she was my baby girl before she became your baby girl..."

"I don't know how I'm supposed to fix it! I don't know what I did wrong really..."

"Hyung, her boyfriend broke up with her because of her tendency to overshare...and you know...talk a lot."

Seungmin's puppy eyes narrowed as his eyebrows furrowed. "What?"

"It was a stupid reason to break up really. She only told me because one time she was feeling insecure when we were hanging out and some lady told me that 'my girlfriend talked a lot'; which I told her that I wasn't dating her but also that it didn't matter because I talk a lot too." Jeongin frowned.

Seungmin blinked a few times and bit his bottom lip.

"I don't think she's upset at you Seungmin..." Changbin spoke. "From what I see it seems like she's trying not to be a burden."

"Burden?"

"She doesn't want you to break up with her so she's trying to change that aspect about herself. You're naturally a quiet person and she probably thinks she's too much for you and that you'll get tired of it."

Seungmin shook his head. "No! I could never get tired of Y/N-ie!"

Chan chuckled. "You guys really are perfect for each other." He says, marveling in his work. "But...tone doesn't translate over text."

"And you're a sarcastic motherfucker." Minho adds.

Hyunjin stretches across the floor. "You can say that again."

Jisung huffs. "Well go on and apologize! Because I want my gossip buddy back! She never finished telling me about the drama on her mom's side of the family! I was invested in which side piece got her cousin pregnant!"

Hyunjin shoots up, sniffing the drama. "Ya! Seungmin fix it! I want to know now too!"

Seungmin looked down at the board as he contemplated just how he could fix this.

Because sometimes words weren't the cure.

But actions were.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry for the short work 🫠. But in all the drafts of my 3 part angst series (oops theres more?) the 2nd part tends to be shorter since its the down hill of the plot.

[amorisxx]

Snickerdoodle a.d.

pairing: Art Donaldson x reader prompt: Imagine being that parent who always brings baked goods to the PTA meetings and generally getting along with everyone really well. But for some reason Art Donaldson says something that rubs you the wrong way one night. warnings: smut 18+, car sex, piv, cheating, adults acting like horny teenagers, flashbacks, not proofread word count: 2.4K a/n: I wrote this in one sitting just from seeing this post 🤭

part ii | part iii | part iv | part v

𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃

He notices he’s offended you by the way you stop talking directly to him, looking everywhere but him. Smiling at everyone but him. You’re giving your undivided attention to anyone who speaks but when he opens his mouth you seem much more interested in your nails.

Art has known you since he's been coming to these meetings. He knows that you offer a polite smile to everyone, but he'd grown used to the small smiles you'd give him. The secret grins and the sarcastic eye rolls you shared with him when Nancy got a bit too controlling or when Dan overshared about his marriage.

You would playfully nudge his elbow when Cynthia inevitably brought up her small knitting business. You’d been initially interested, always loving a good sweater, until you found out the only things she knit were small replicas of pets.

You would discreetly play tic tac toe or hangman on a napkin while the more aggressive moms argued about where to host the next school event, or when the guest speaker for the night would drone on and on.

Once, you baked snickerdoodle cookies and Art ate three of them in one sitting, then asked to take some home for “Lily.” So, you made sure to bake snickerdoodle cookies almost every time you brought snacks. Everyone knew the circular red tin you’d bring was Art’s.

The two of you didn’t really talk outside of the PTA, but Art considered you his friend at these things.

Which is why he should've known not to bring up your recently divorced ex-husband during the meeting. He’d simply been trying to make sure the headcount for this year’s Fall Fest committee was right after Nancy had thrusted the clipboard into his hands. He was tasked with making sure everyone on the list was still showing up. When Art asked you if your husband would still be attending, you went silent, your lips tensing up like you’d tasted something sour.

“Are you really asking me that right now?”

Art stammered. “I just wasn’t sure…”

You scoffed at him disbelieving.

“Well when he finally gets his head out of that whore’s ass then maybe he’ll be able to let you know.”

He doesn’t say anything.

Before he hands the clipboard back, he makes sure to draw a line through your ex-husband’s name.

Art tries to apologize after the meeting is over. Insisting on walking you to your car and carrying your dessert containers back for you. His self deprecating little smile makes you roll your eyes, but you turn for him to follow you anyway. You silently lead the way to your car keeping a couple steps ahead of him. Despite his attempts to look away, Art’s eyes stay glued to the sway of your hips the whole way.

Once you pop the trunk and gesture for him to place the containers down, you finally look him in the eyes for the first time since he’d pissed you off. Art shoves his hands in his pockets, telling you he’s really sorry for what he said. That he wasn’t thinking. He wants to make it up to you.

You purse your lips, look at the way his eyes seem hopeful yet a little too pleading for an offense so small. You tilt your head to the side, taking in his features before eventually telling him that “it’s fine,” and that you forgive him. He seems to visibly relax at this and you can’t help wondering why he would be so hung up on your forgiveness. After all, it was really an overreaction on your part.

You tell him as much and reassure him that you don’t need anything, he doesn’t need to make it up to you. He grabs your hand then, insisting that he wants to.

Art has always been this way, you think, all placating and overly apologetic when he thinks he’s done something wrong. You’d chalked it up to the media training you know he must’ve received. Being agreeable probably made his PR manager’s job ten times easier. Not that you didn’t believe he was genuinely a kind person, but you knew even Art might be overcompensating every now and then.

You’d seen the way he could be snarky without remorse before. The two of you would basically laugh about it later. You’d also seen how he never hid the way his eyes would linger on your cleavage. The way he’d give you a small, bashful smile when you’d catch him, his smirk only growing wider the more you blushed.

Art Donaldson could be sneaky.

ᯓ

He’d never been ashamed about being touchy with you. Placing a warm hand on your arm or back when greeting one another, letting his fingers skim your hand on the table next to his while he listened to speakers. The touching seemed innocent enough until one night when he’d walked you to your car after the two of you had stayed longer. You had been distracted during the meeting.

Art stayed and listened as you told him about your husband and how he’d come home late after you planned a romantic evening for the two of you the night before. You made sure your son was at your parents’ house, made his favorite meal, and lit candles around the house. The two of you had decided to schedule date nights per your therapist’s suggestion. When 1 am rolled around, and your husband had returned none of your calls, you scraped the food into tupperware containers and got ready for bed. He came home with apologies and excuses about getting caught up in the office. He had already eaten, and he smelled of a perfume you didn’t own but had grown to recognize.

That night, you told Art that you were sure your husband was cheating on you. He told you that he understood how you felt. You didn’t believe him. Tashi was perfect.

After your tears had dried, and Art managed to pull a few laughs out of you, the both of you decided it was time to call it a night. You moved to give Art a casual hug, but he wrapped his arms around you so tightly that you couldn’t help but melt into it, burying your face in his chest. You remembered him smelling warm, like amber.

Art had rubbed your back as he held you, whispered that he was sorry that your husband was a dumbass. You huffed out a laugh, pulling away to look at him. He’d brought his hand up to your cheek, his other hand on the small of your back. You smiled at him through your eyelashes before letting your head drop down with a sigh.

Your cheeks burned as you took in how your legs were tangled with his. Art had tilted his head to get a better look at you again, but you’d stuck to hiding your face against his chest.

He huffed and let his chin fall to your shoulder. You still refused to look his way, turning to watch some trees. You felt both his hands on your back now.

“What are you thinking about?” He whispered.

“That we said we should go home like 5 min ago.” His hands traveled lower. “You?” You asked shakily. You could feel his breath warm against your neck.

“That I might not be any better than your husband.”

Your eyes widened. Art’s palms firmly cupped your ass. In contrast, his lips were pressed gently to the skin of your neck.

“Art!” Your hands flew to his hair.

He laughed into your neck.

You slapped his arm, but when his eyes met yours and his lips were mere inches away from yours, you let your eyes flutter shut.

His breath fanned your lips. He smelled like snickerdoodle cookie.

Then, his phone rang.

Art had pulled away from you, turning around to answer the call. You could tell it was Tashi. He’d been honest, telling her that he’d stayed late talking to you. At the mention of your name, he paused and looked over his shoulder.

“Tashi says hi.”

ᯓ

The two of you never brought up the almost kiss again, but you knew Art hadn’t been sorry. The next time he saw your husband, he’d smirked and told him how lucky he was to have such a great wife. Your husband, ever the narcissist, soaked it all in, pulling you in by the waist, showing you off like a shiny toy. When he turned away, Art had winked at you.

ᯓ

So, you know that Art is either laying it on thick or feels extremely remorseful about reminding you of your cheating ex-husband.

When he grabs your hand, insisting on finding some way to make it up to you, you see a look of desperation in his eyes that looks new.

Your eyes drop to where his large hand covers your own, then they travel up his toned arm until you find his face, flitting between his eyes and his lips. And for some reason, you’re leaning in. Maybe it’s your way of reassuring him that you guys are good. Either way, he’s not moving back. You’re gripping his forearm with your free hand and suddenly your lips are on his.

You’re not sure if it was his tongue or yours that first went seeking out the other, but now you two are sharing sloppy kisses on the empty school parking lot.

When his left palm presses into your cheek and you feel that cold metal band sting your skin, you pull away with a gasp, remembering where you are, who he is, and that he has a damn wedding ring on. This is Art. PTA Art. You know his wife, for god’s sake. You’ve hosted play dates between their daughter and your son. You carpool with them. You curse and back away from him.

“I’m sorry, I—I don’t know why I did that. I shouldn’t have...”

Art shakes his head, stepping closer to you. He’s looking at you with those damn eyes again. Like he’ll break if you say the wrong thing.

“I—we, we shouldn’t have done that, Art.”

He shakes his head again. Your palm comes up to hold him back, but it doesn’t work as he simply grabs ahold of the hand on his chest and presses himself against you more. His forehead comes down to lean on yours. His eyes closed.

“You don’t understand,” he sighs. “I want you.”

“But you’re married Art…”

“I want you.” He repeats. “I’ve wanted you…for awhile now.”

And though you already know this, it still shocks you that he’s actually saying it now. Before you have time to register it, he’s back on you and you don’t know if it’s because you’re afraid to break him or if you’ve just always been this selfish, but you let him press you against the trunk of your car. You let him push his tongue into your mouth, let his big hands knead the flesh of your hips and ass. Let him lick and nip at your neck, nibble on your earlobe.

You let Art push you into the backseat of your car. You let him settle between your legs, guiding his lips to yours, wrapping your legs around his waist.

He’s pressing his hips into yours rocking against you as he pushes your top up. Art’s hands frantically work at your bra, impatiently bending the wire in the process of taking it off. You gasp at his eagerness but can’t say anything as he’s already wrapping his mouth around your nipple making you arch your back up off the leather seats. His hands are gripping your thighs and shoving your skirt up when he releases your nipple with a pop.

He’s up long enough to tear his shirt off and for your equally impatient hands to reach for his pants. His shorts are barely past his balls before he’s back on you. Kissing all over your lips, jaw, neck. Art groans when his fingers find their way to your soaked underwear, rubbing his thumb from your slit to your clit through the fabric. You whine and rock your hips into each movement. You pant into his open mouth as he pulls them to the side, letting the air hit your bare cunt. He dips his thumb into your entrance then drags it up to sloppily circle your clit.

You’re moaning loudly into his mouth, begging him for more. Art smiles against your lips as he takes himself in his hand. He lets his head sweetly kiss your sticky clit, and he asks if you want him to put it in.

You nod eagerly.

"Yeah?" He grunts, tapping his head against you in a taunting manner.

You nod again and let him press against your opening.

Art covers your mouth with his when he finally pushes into you, stifling both of your moans. He gets his arms around your waist, holding you as he rocks into your pussy. You’re whimpering and squeezing around him like you haven’t had dick in years, and Art thinks he might pass out when you start bucking up into him and begging him to fuck you.

He doesn’t even care that he won’t last long. He can’t deny you. So, he wraps your thighs tighter around his waist and pushes himself forward. Your mouth falls open as Art slides out and pushes back into you with a grunt. Your hands are in his hair, pulling at the short strands. You mouth at his jaw as his thighs slap against you.

Art buries his head into your neck as he frantically fucks into your tight hole, and he’s whining that he’s close. His fingers that have been playing with your clit are slippery with your juices and you clench your thighs, nodding with him in agreement.

You end up letting Art Donaldson cum inside you. You let him rub your clit until you orgasm around his dick that’s still buried in you.

You let him help you redress. He’d winced when he saw the mess he made of you between your legs. You ignore the way you can tell he wants to say sorry.

Once you’re both dressed and you’re standing against your car with wobbly legs, Art tells you that he still wants to make it up to you.

You roll your eyes.

“Good night, Art.” You get into the driver’s seat.

“I’m serious.”

Your hand hesitates on the door handle. You look back at him and his pleading eyes and his pathetic yet charming smile.

“Your wife has my number.”

And then, you shut the door.

𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃

a/n: reader reminds me of Anna Kendrick’s character in A Simple Favor, sweet but also kinda toxic

thanks for inspiring this @artdcnaldson <3

[wongyuseokie]

All Too Well | c.s.c

Summary: You thought you met the man of your dreams. He was everything you ever wanted, but what happens when that dream falls apart and when that man is no longer the one you recognise? You want to love him against all odds because you believe things can be better.

☆ 18+ minors dni |☀︎fluff | ☁︎ angst | ♕smut | ♥ completed works

Word Count: 21,190 words 

Pairings: Professor! Seungcheol x Female Reader Genre/Trope(s)/AU(s): Established Relationship, break up au! Slightly (quite) toxic relationship, HEAVY ANGST, fluff, smut. 

Content Warnings: There is an age gap between the reader and Seungcheol, but it’s not massive. He’s 30, and she’s 25, but it’s enough to cause problems. Seungcheol is a condescending little shit in this. Yelling, swearing, crying, arguments, toxic couple behaviours, mentions of an injury. Hospitalisation it’s nothing serious—mentions of blood.  Smut Warnings: smut, unprotected sex (don’t do this). Fingering, oral (male and female receiving) shower sex, multiple orgasms, squirting and using sex as an apology.   Authors Note 1: This fic will hurt quite a bit, but I like pain and write many of my experiences with my ex. It’s a form of free therapy, and it feels cathartic. Also, this story is fiction. Cheol is a fucking dick in this. This is a story that is not reflective of him or my impression of him. It is pure fiction, nothing else. Authors Note 2: Thank you so so much to my lovely @multi-kpop-fanfics for reading over this, my lovely @wooahaeproductions and @gyuwoncheol for beta'ing this fic for me 🩷 Authors Note 3: This is a Seventeen rewrite of an old Joon fic of mine, so if it looks familiar, that’s why hehe. 

Taglist: @dkluvrsclub @wooahaeproductions @stayinhellevator @aaniag @seungkwansphd @tomodachiii @gyuminusone @bitchlessdino @zezedoesshit @ohmygodwhyareallusernamestaken @noiceoofed @joonsytip @miniseokminnies @wonwoos-wineparty @persnyako @deobienthusiast @the-boy-meets-evil @gyuswhore @gyuwoncheol @shuadotcom @multi-kpop-fanfics @ourdawnishotterthanourday @thegirlwhoimagined @starlight-night0 @dreamsbloomout @aaasia111 @wongyuuu @ana-marais98 @gaslysainz @cherrylita @highvern Part of the Broken Illusions Stories

© wongyuseokie 2024. All rights reserved

“Mia, I’m not going to go on Tinder to end a dry spell, nor am I going to sleep with any of the men here. They are all old and most likely married. I’m not keen,” you groaned to your best friend. 

Mia had dragged you out tonight because she said that you had a dry spell that needed to be broken, but you were not going to submit to your hormones, and you surely were not going to submit to some random guy on Tinder with the worst possible pick-up lines. 

“Look, I can take care of myself. Men are useless and self-obsessed,” you claimed before sipping your martini. 

“Surely not all men?” A voice spoke, making you choke on your drink. 

You wiped your face wiped it of what? quickly and turned around in your seat to face the voice’s owner. Your eyes widened like saucers upon seeing the man standing before you. You were speechless, and as your eyes scanned, trailed from his deep-set eyes, his impeccable build, and his thighs, thighs that you wanted to straddle and ride until you screamed his name over and over. 

“Nope, all men,” you quipped, making the handsome stranger smile at you, revealing his deep dimples. 

“Y/N’s been burned by useless men, men who’ve claimed to be all that and then fell short, so she’s quite cynical about most men,” Mia chimed. “Ow!” Mia yelped when you kicked her shin for oversharing. 

“Well, how about I get you another drink?” The man suggested, and Mia grinned before hopping off her barstool. 

“Great, you do that! I have an early shift tomorrow. Stay safe, Y/N,” Mia said, winking as she headed out of the bar, and you glared at her, knowing that her ‘stay safe’ comment also meant to use a condom. 

“I’m Seungcheol.” The stranger introduced himself, and you nodded, turning around to face the bar as he sat down next to you. 

“Well, you already know my name. My best friend did kind of yell it,” you deadpanned. You didn’t care how ridiculously handsome Seungcheol was. He could just be another man who could talk a big game and be useless. 

“What would you like to drink?” Seungcheol asked, and you shrugged. “Surprise me,” you said. You made a mental note that if he got you some fruity shit, you’d leave him the second the words left his mouth. 

“How about a Yuzu fizz gin and tonic?” Seungcheol offered, and you smiled at him, nodding. 

“I can guess that if I ordered something you didn’t approve of, you would have left the bar by now?” Seungcheol joked.

“Well, now you’ll never know, will you?” You joked, making Seungcheol smile again. 

“So why are you here? Trying to find Prince Charming?” Seungcheol asked with a chuckle.

“Oh, come on, be honest. I’m not one to judge,” Seungcheol encouraged, and a sly grin formed on your face. 

“If you insist, then okay,” you started to say, inching closer to him, swallowing a gulp as you took in the scent of his cologne. It was musky, spicy, and woody all at once. 

“I’ve been stuck in a painfully long dry spell, and my hand is exhausted. I just need to find someone to fuck me hard,” you answered nonchalantly, and you swore you saw Seungcheol gulp slightly. 

“You’re telling me a woman as beautiful as you has not found a man?” Seungcheol asked as he moved away to hand you your drink. You took a sip out of the glass, smiling at the taste. 

“Good?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded. 

“Would you like to try?” You asked, and Seungcheol shook his head. 

“Maybe later?” Seungcheol replied, and you nodded.

“But to answer your question, it’s not about looks. For instance, a guy might be doing well, then he’ll say something obnoxious, and I’ll no longer be interested,” you explained.

“Fair enough, I apologise on behalf of my species. We often get too excited when we see a beautiful woman and act up,” Seungcheol clarified, making you grin. Seungcheol was incredibly handsome and sweet, but you didn’t feel anything. Nothing clicked. There was no instant chemistry; suddenly, you felt tired and bored and just wanted to be wrapped up in your blanket. 

“Well, this was nice. Thank you for the drink, but I think I will call it a night,” you said, and Seungcheol simply smiled at you. You were relieved at how he wasn’t pushy or objecting to the fact that you wanted to leave so early. Most of the men you had met would get defensive or be less than understanding if you wanted to go before they got to cop a feel.

“Wait, how are you getting home?” Seungcheol asked. 

“Walking home, it’s a twenty-minute walk,” you replied.

“Y/N, you can punch me if I step out of line, but no, you’re not walking home alone.” You sighed, but you didn’t mind entirely, plus you could kick him in the crotch if he acted up. You were cognizant enough to do so. 

“Well then, Seungcheol, since it’s a bit of a walk, shall we play a game?” You asked as you both stepped out of the bar and started to walk. 

“Seriously?” Seungcheol asked, grinning. 

 “Humour me, Seungcheol .” 

“Fine then.”

“Great, let’s play twenty questions,” and you proceeded to ask. “How old are you?” 

“30,” he replied. 

“If it’s not too rude to ask you, the same?” Seungcheol asked, and you smiled before replying, “25.” 

“I have another question if it’s not too crude?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded at him to ask it. “When you said you wanted to be fucked hard, how hard?”  You gulped; you swore his voice had gotten deeper and huskier since he left the bar. You chalked up your reaction to the cold air, playing tricks on your mind. 

“If let’s say, hypothetically, it was me, how hard would you want me to fuck you?” Seungcheol continued , making you stop and turn to face him. His eyes were piercing and burned through any façade you had on tonight. 

“Hard enough to make me forget my name,” you whispered, earning a nod from Seungcheol. 

The rest of the walk was filled with silence, aside from a few questions from Seungcheol, but you couldn’t get the vision of him standing over you and asking you how hard you’d like to be fucked out of your head. 

“Well,” you breathed out when your eyes landed on your front door. 

“This is me,” you said, standing with your back against your front door. 

“Wait, I have one thing I want to try but don’t worry, you still have permission to knee me in the balls,” Seungcheol teased, making you chuckle, only for a second, before his soft lips landed on yours. The kiss was so light it almost felt like nothing happened, but you knew it did because you felt your heartbeat out of your chest the minute his lips grazed yours. 

“I always wanted to know what the Yuzu gin and tonic tasted like,” Seungcheol said smugly before moving away from you.

“Well, it was lovely meeting you,” Seungcheol said, leaving you speechless and breathless as he turned around and walked away from your front door. 

“Seungcheol! Wait!” He turned around, smiling at you. 

“Would you like to come in for a nightcap? We still have several questions left,” you suggested, hoping he’d say yes. Seungcheol grinned as he nodded, following you into your apartment. 

Fifteen questions in, Seungcheol and you were on your living room sofa. You were cuddling into his side, your legs on his lap. Around five questions ago, Seungcheol’s hand started trailing your exposed thighs , and  you had let out a few soft moans at his touch. 

“Question sixteen for you, Y/N,” Seungcheol said, and you laughed at him. 

“You kept count?” You asked, and Seungcheol nodded.  

“I’m very detail-oriented,” Seungcheol replied, and you rolled your eyes.. Seungcheol’s hand stopped trailing your thighs; instead, he gently squeezed them. 

“Tell me, how hard did you want to be fucked?” He asked again, and you quirked your brows at him. 

“You already asked,” you replied breathlessly, and Seungcheol shrugged. 

“Would it hurt to get details?” Seungcheol pressed staring right into your eyes. You would be lying if you said you didn’t start getting wet five questions ago, but now your core ached at his words. 

“So hard that I can’t walk, so that I’m a mumbling and whimpering mess.” You said as you moved so that you were straddling Seungcheol. You gently moved your hips against his, and you felt his length hardening. 

“Question seventeen for you. Why did you ask me for a drink tonight?” you asked as Seungcheol groaned and held your waist, stopping your movements.

“When I saw you in this dress, I couldn’t help but think about how I wanted to do nothing more than rip it off your body,” Seungcheol spoke, and you moaned at his words. His grip on your waist got tighter, and you were sure you would be bruised tomorrow, but you didn’t care. 

“Question eighteen, Y/N, are you wet right now?” Seungcheol asked, and you smirked and proceeded to reply with another question. 

“Question nineteen, Seungcheol, do you want to find out?” You asked, and Seungcheol’s eyes darkened with lust as he nodded,lifting the pushed-up hem of your dress so that it was at the waistband of your panties. 

Seungcheol looked at you for consent, and you nodded, giving it to him. He pulled your panties to the side and brushed his fingers through your folds. Seungcheol moaned at your wetness, then moved his fingers to his mouth, and relished your taste. 

“Final question, baby. What’s your safe word?” He asked.

“Peaches,” you replied.

“Peaches it is,” Seungcheol responded, content with your answer, he carried you to your bedroom to a night filled with absolute pleasure. 

You woke up the following day to soft snores; you smiled softly at Seungcheol sleeping. Seungcheol looked incredibly handsome, even with his hair ruffled and mouth open as he snored lightly. You hated how you were romanticising this one moment, especially considering that it was the result of several drinks and very sexual questions that led him to your bedroom. Still, at this moment, you wished that this would be the view you could wake up to every day. 

He was perfect. He was so sweet, loving, gentle, and kind all night long. You wouldn’t be opposed to having that type of care and affection regularly. 

You decided to get out of bed and grab your oversized nightshirt as you headed to the kitchen, leaving your bedroom quietly not to wake him up andruin the little daydream you were happily living in. 

You took a detour, making sure to head to the bathroom first, freshen up, and then head to the kitchen, where you made a cup of green tea for yourself and a cup of hot coffee for Seungcheol. In your hazy recollection of last night, you remembered Seungcheol ordering a couple of espresso martinis, so you assumed coffee would be a good idea. 

You held the mugs in your hand as you headed back to your bedroom, smiling when you saw Seungcheol sitting up, stretching, and smiling sleepily at you when he turned his head to face you. 

“Damn, and here I thought you left me,” Seungcheol joked. His deep morning voice made you feel warm, like the tea that warmed your throat with every sip. 

“It’s my house,” you replied, smiling at him and handing him a mug of coffee. 

“So, what do you do, Y/N?” Seungcheol asked. “Aside from rock my world,” he added, joking, making you roll your eyes at him. 

“I’m a freelance web designer, but I just took a break to travel with my friends for a bit, and so I’m just getting back into it.I need to go out and hustle to get clients again,” you said, and you noticed an emotion you couldn’t decipher flash across Seungcheol’s features. 

You assumed he was squinting at the morning sunlight streaming into your bedroom, but it was gloomy. Still, it was early, and maybe he was just tired. 

“What do you do?” You asked, not wanting to dwell on your thoughts for too long. 

“I’m an English Literature professor at Seoul National University,” Seungcheol said, and you couldn’t help but notice the hint of smugness that laced his tone. Still, then again, if you were a professor at the most prestigious universities in the country, maybe you, too, would behave that way. 

“So, you’re like a nerd?” You joked and knew it fell flat, noticing how Seungcheol gave you no reaction. 

“Is it still a thing to call people nerds? Youngsters these days,” Seungcheol mused, and you couldn’t help but again detect an undercurrent of an unpleasant tone that made you feel uncomfortable. You let it slide because you knew nothing about this man. 

“I enjoyed last night,” you said softly, joining him on your bed, hoping to change the topic. 

“I did, too. I didn’t think heading out for a drink after work would help me find you,” Seungcheol agreed. 

“I, uh,” you fumbled. You wanted to ask if he would be willing to see you again, and Seungcheol got the hint. 

“I want to see you again, and not just to repeat last night, but because I want to get to know you more,” Seungcheol said, and you beamed at him. 

“Shit, I need to get home and shower and get to the university, but can I have your number? I’ll text you after my lecture today, and yes, I’ll text today itself because I don’t believe in the whole bullshit of waiting for a day after to tell someone you enjoyed their company. I guess that’s something I learned with age,” Seungcheol stated. 

Then, you wondered if you felt Seungcheol’s age would be a motif you could never get rid of. 

“Wait, so the buff hot guy, you ended up going home with him and fucking him?” Mia exclaimed obnoxiously loud in the supermarket, making you glare at her as you got a few disapproving stares from fellow shoppers. 

“Oh, you need to work on your indoor voice. You will end up spilling my life story to the world,” you said, elbowing Mia, who shrugged. 

“So well, was he the kind of dick you want inside you again, or what?” Mia asked as you grabbed some pasta and put it in your shopping cart. 

“He asked me out,” you replied.“Well, sort of. He said he doesn’t believe in waiting a while to text, so he said he’d text me today because he enjoyed my company,” you clarified, and you saw Mia’s grin widen. 

“What does he do?” Mia asked. “He’s a professor of literature and SNU,” you responded.

“Damn, I need your luck to get that kind of dick on a night out, a qualified dick, if you will,” Mia joked, making you laugh. 

“I don’t know, he still hasn’t texted, and it’s nearly 7, and if he texts any later than that, it’ll just be for a hookup, and I don’t want to be a booty call,” you explained, and Mia nodded. 

“Well, he’s a professor at one of the most prestigious universities. Maybe he got busy, and if he enjoyed your company, I’m sure he doesn’t only want sex,” Mia explained. You shrugged unsurely, and your phone buzzed in your pocket as if on cue. 

Unknown Number: Hey, it’s Seungcheol. Sorry for not texting earlier like I said. Students had a lot of concerns, and it’s been a long day. I finally wrapped up, and if you haven’t made plans already, I’d like to take you out for a late-night dessert.

You smiled at your phone for what must have been  too long, considering Mia decided to nudge you. “Fucking reply, you dork, and have him for dessert because that man must be sweet,” Mia teased, wiggling her brows at you, making you roll your eyes at her as you typed a reply. 

You: Hey Seungcheol, that’s okay. Dessert? Colour me intrigued, where should I meet you?

Not even a minute afteryou sent the message, you saw the words “Seungcheol is typing,” flash across your screen, making you smile and feel giddy like a teenager having a crush. 

Seungcheol: Send me your location, and I’ll pick you up. 

You: Sure! 

You: Location sent

Seungcheol: Perfect, see you in a few! 

You grinned at your phone as Mia headed towards the check-out aisle. “Wow, he’s offering to pick you up, too. He’s already a keeper,” Mia stated, and you shrugged. 

“How?” You asked, curious to understand your best friend’s logic. 

“He’s going out of his way to meet you and pick you up; he wants to spend more time with you before the date. He isn’t simply telling you to meet him at a place. He is making the time and effort to take you out on a date after a busy day. That’s a good sign,” Mia explained, making you smile. 

You and Mia had paid for your groceries and now were waiting outside. You were conversing with Mia when a sleek black Mercedes caught your eye. It was a sexy car, and your eyes widened when Seungcheol stepped out of the car and smiled at you. 

“Sorry, I hope I didn’t keep you in the cold too long?” Seungcheol said, and you shook your head at him. 

“Not at all,” you said shyly, earning a particularly hard nudge at your side from Mia, who noticed your shyness. 

“I’m Mia, you must be Seungcheol,” she greeted, making Seungcheol laugh. 

“I remember you, you’re trouble; you were the one who was kind enough to inundate me with Y/N’s sex life that night,” Seungcheol recalled, flustering Mia and you. 

“Well, it worked out, didn’t it?” Mia countered, making Seungcheol smile, allowing his deep dimples to appear, making you smile too.

“Can’t deny that”, Seungcheol agreed, winking at you, making you smile even more, so much so that you thought your cheeks would break. 

“Well, I’ll leave you to it,” Mia said as she started to walk away.

“Wait, Mia, why don’t I drive you home before we both head out on our date? It’s cold and late,” Seungcheol offered, and for some reason, that stung. You don’t know why. She was your best friend; she’d never betray you, and Seungcheol, well, he was nothing to you right now. 

Mia looked at you nervously, and you shrugged before nodding. “Yeah, come on, girl, it’s cold out. Besides, it’s not a long drive,” you rambled nervously, and Mia nodded as she approached the car. 

Seungcheol was nothing but a gentleman, holding the door open for youfirst, letting you in the front seat next to him, and then moving to help Mia into the back seat, and you couldn’t help the ugly feeling of jealousy that stirred in the pit of your stomach. 

Why would he help her after me? You thought and shook your head to rid yourself of those thoughts. You needed to compose yourself before Seungcheol joined you in the driver’s seat. 

“Alright, Mia, why don’t you tell me your address?” Seungcheol asked, flashing her a smile. You forced another smile at your best friend, annoyed at how your emotions clouded your ability to be rational, but Mia was right. Seungcheol was a catch, and you didn’t fancy losing him to your best friend. 

The entire drive to Mia’s apartment was filled with awkward silence, aside from a couple of jokes from Seungcheol and a few nervous giggles from Mia. You kept your gaze on the road ahead, refusing to engage in the conversation. You hated how your insecurities got the better of you and ruined a good time. 

“Thank you, Seungcheol,” Mia said softly, and for a second, you wanted to roll your eyes at her when you heard how sickly sweet her voice sounded, but then you realised that’s what she always sounded  like and that your insecurity nearly caused you to ignore your best friend. You could tell Mia had noticed too as she too kept stealing worried glances at you. 

“Hey, I’d never, and I’m sorry I imposed tonight,” Mia said as she exited the car and stood by your window. You let out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding and nodded. 

“I know, I’m just sorry. I got insecure,” you admitted quietly, and Mia nodded before hugging you awkwardly. 

“Have fun tonight. Remember, he wants to spend time with you. You’re not a second option,” Mia reassured, and you smiled at her, mentally noting to send her a long and apologetic text after tonight. 

Seungcheol, ever the gentleman, walked Mia to her door and waited for her to go inside before hereturned to the car, sat in the driver’s seat, and smiled at you, which you half-heartedly returned. 

“Okay, did you and Mia argue before I showed up?” Seungcheol asked, and you shook your head. “Then why did you act as if I overstepped by dropping her home?” Seungcheol questioned, and you sighed. 

“Can I blame it on insecurities, and you can drop this?” You asked, and Seungcheol’s face softened. 

“I want to spend my night with you, not her. How about I make it up to you over the best cake ever?” Seungcheol suggested, and you nodded, smiling at him. 

The drive was filled with the music in Seungcheol’s car and lo-fi remixes, and halfway along the drive, Seungcheol broke the silence. 

“So, this place is far, but I promise you it’s the best dessert place in the world. I know the owners, and I’ve known them since I was a kid, so they’re like family, so the food is legit,” Seungcheol rambled, making you smile. 

“So busy day, huh?” You asked, and Seungcheol nodded as he moved one hand off the steering wheel to lace it with yours. 

“Yeah, but seeing you made it all better,” Seungcheol replied, making you smile at him. 

“Cute,” you replied, making him grin as he drove. 

“What about you? How was your day?” Seungcheol asked, now properly holding your hand as he kept his free hand on the steering wheel and continued to drive. 

“Well, I mean, it wasn’t particularly productive. I asked a few clients if they had any upcoming projects I could assist with,” you explained 

“Well, you can’t be passive about it. If you want something, you need to chase after it,” Seungcheol explained and then winced slightly. “Fuck sorry, I’ve been with students all day, repeating this shit to them, and I automatically clicked into professor mode; sorry,” Seungcheol apologised, reaching gently to take your hand and bring it to his lips.

“You’re not exactly wrong, but maybe just keep the life coach’s advice for the kids?” You joked, and Seungcheol’s eyes lit up as he pulled into the familiar driveway of the bakery.

“We’re here!” Seungcheol exclaimed excitedly as he parked the car, getting out first and heading to help you. 

“Oh,” you said, pointing to your grocery bag.

“Leave it here; it’s cool,” Seungcheol replied. 

“Shall we?” Seungcheol asked as he closed the car door behind you and held out his hand for you; you took it, smiling as his large hand engulfed yours, making you feel safe. 

“Is that who I think it is?” A voice called out from the bakery’s back, and Seungcheol grinned, hearing the voice as he replied. 

“Halmeoni, it is. Cheol is hungry,” Seungcheol said playfully as he guided you into the bakery and a more petite older woman approached Seungcheol. 

“Oh, you are getting buffer by the day, and I see it’s paying off. Who is this beautiful woman?” The lady asked, making you smile shyly.

“Y/N, she and I are here on a date, halmeoni,” Seungcheol explained, making you grin even more. 

“Well, I’m glad to see you are dating again. After Yoona, I thought I lost you for good,” the lady added, and you felt Seungcheol’s grip on your hand tighten at the mention of Yoona. Lost him how?

“Halmeoni, not now, please,” Seungcheol warned. 

“My dear, Y/N, how rude of me. I’m Minji Kim, but you can address me as Halmeoni. Why don’t you two sit? I’ll get you the specials?” Ms. Kim offered.Seungcheol nodded as he guided you inside to find a more secluded booth to sit in. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Seungcheol said softly as you sat down. You were about to counter, saying you weren’t planning to ask him, but you decided against it. It wasn’t your place. Not tonight, at least, not on a first date. 

“This is our best-selling product and Cheol’s favourite,” Ms. Kim interrupted a couple of minutes later, as she placed a molten cake on the middle of the table and placed down two forks as well. 

“Enjoy, kids,” Ms. Kim said before she disappeared. 

“I know it looks simple,” Seungcheol started to say, “But this is the best thing ever. Open,” Seungcheol said as he picked up a forkful of the molten cake and moved the fork to your lips. You accepted the cake, letting out a hum of approval as the chocolatey taste filled your mouth. 

“Fuck, that’s amazing,” you praised, and Seungcheol smirked as he took a bite for himself. 

“Halmeoni says the love she pours into the cake makes it so delicious. She’ll never tell me her recipe, even if I beg,” Seungcheol complained, and you laughed at him. 

“Isn’t that better? Some things are better left unsaid. It might ruin the magic,” you said, and Seungcheol smiled slightly. 

“Ah, the childlike wonder, cute,” Seungcheol said, earning a funny look from you. 

“Is that a problem?” You asked, moving your hand away from him. Seungcheol shook his head. 

“No, I guess I have a very black-and-white view of the world, and sometimes I fail to account that other people don’t. I like that you see the world with all its beauty and colours,” Seungcheol explained.

“Well, stick around me long enough, and maybe you’ll see the world with a bit more colour?” you suggested, and Seungcheol shrugged. 

“We’ll see,” Seungcheol said, and you gathered from his tone that he didn’t fancy discussing this issue further. 

“Hey, you’ve got cake on your face,” Seungcheol said, leaning forward, and you assumed he’d wipe the cake off your lips. Instead, you were met with his soft lips. You melted against his lips as they moved against yours, only for him to pull away for a second and then find your lips again. You pulled away this time with a light smile. 

“Halmeoni will have the worst impression of me if all I do is make out with you here,” you joked, and Seungcheol smirked. 

“I agree. How about we finish this cake, and maybe I can show you how much I wanted to spend my day with you instead of lecturing my students?” Seungcheol suggested, and you couldn’t help how your expression changed.Seungcheol caught onto it as well. 

“I didn’t ask you out only to have sex with you, I promise. I want your company, but I also want to be able to hold your hand and maybe steal a few kisses here and there. I’d rather do that in a comfortable setting and not traumatise poor halmeoni,” Seungcheol clarified as he placed another kiss on your lips, and you hummed into the kiss. 

“Shall we?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded.You stood up with him, placing your hand in his, and following him to the counter as he paid for the cake, much to your and halemoni’s protests. Seungcheol smiled as he walked out the bakery door, ensuring to wave to Ms. Kim. You felt yourself becoming more enamoured by his actions.  

You concluded that Seungcheol could have a hard exterior, but soft inside, much like the lava cake. He could seem slightly unapproachable with his curt and short replies, but if you dug deep enough, you knew he was filled with nothing but love and warmth, and you were determined to get to know that Seungcheol. 

You were determined that you could be that one for him, the one he’d let in. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Seungcheol asked as his voice took you out of your daydream of becoming the future Mrs Choi. 

“I enjoyed tonight; well, everything tonight has been so incredible,” you admitted, and Seungcheol turned to smile at you, nearly running through the red light, making you laugh and gasp.

“Fuck, do you think being distracted by you is a valid reason for running a red light?” Seungcheol joked, and you shook your head at him. 

“Nope, but I think it’s cute,” you said as you placed your hand on his knee. 

“That impatient? We’re almost back at mine,” Seungcheol teased, and you rolled your eyes at him,pinching his knee a bit which made him laugh. 

The drive back to Seungcheol’s place was filled with jokes and flirty remarks.Once Seungcheol reached his apartment, he couldn’t park the car soon enough and hurriedly helped you out,practically running to his apartment with your hand in his. 

The minute you were inside his apartment, you took a second to take off your red scarf. You placed it on the coat hanger by the door and squealed in surprise when Seungcheol turned you around in his embrace, bending down to lift you into his arms and carry you over to his sofa. 

You stared at him, confused. What did he want? Was it just sex? You wondered, and Seungcheol spoke,  ending  your worries within seconds. 

“I just want to hold you like this, in my arms, look,” Seungcheol started to say as he adjusted his position so that you were lying between his body, your chin on his toned chest. “Maybe I’m moving too quickly, but I told you I don’t believe in all that bull shit of following rules. You’re the first person I’ve felt this  comfortable with for so long, so forgive me if all this is too much because I can reign it in,” Seungcheol admitted as he stroked your cheek, making you smile. 

You sat up for a second tokick off your boots, taking your position back, and laying on his chest. “I don’t need you to reign any of this in,” you reassured. Seungcheol was special; he was older, wiser, and something you had never had. You weren’t about to lose him for the sake of some social constructs relating to dating. 

You always felt like people made up or exaggerated when it came to how love made them feel.  You had friends, like Mia, who would act like they were on cloud nine or something when they were in love, and you never understood it. It wasn’t because you were traumatised as a child or anything, far from it. 

You were a happy kid, but your parents weren’t in love. You knew that your parents stayed married for your sake, and while you would always commend them for that because you knew you could never do that, you never understood the point of pretending. All that to say, you never grew up with a perfect example of what love looked like, and after shitty hookups and your fair share of fuck boys and heartbreak, you gave up on the concept. 

You didn’t hate love; you just assumed it was something inconceivable that others got, the lucky ones, and you, you didn’t think you’d ever get it. You had convinced yourself that for so long, until you met Seungcheol, until that first kiss with him.

Now, four months later, you watched your boyfriend working. 

That was your man, your safe space, your home. Even though there were petty fights and arguments, you two would make it work because that’s what people do when they’re in love. 

They fight for each other. 

“Okay, I guess I’m decent-looking enough, but you’ve been staring at my face for the past ten minutes, with a smile on yours,” Seungcheol chuckled as he looked at you. 

“Wait, I’ve been staring for that long?” You asked, feeling slightly flustered. Seungcheol nodded as he pulled you closer into his chest. 

“What’s on your mind?” Seungcheol asked as his hand traced patterns lazily on your lower back. 

“I just-,” you started to say.“Are you real?” You asked Seungcheol, who furrowed his brows at you. 

“What?” Seungcheol asked

“I don’t know, I fuck. I never believed that I could have something like this,” you said shyly, and Seungcheol smiled fondly at you. 

“Like what?” Seungcheol encouraged, and you took a deep breath to sit up and adjusted until you sat crossed-legged next to Seungcheol on the bed. He soon followed, sitting up, and leaning against his headboard. 

“Like, I always thought love was a beautiful concept, but it was a concept that others would get, not me. I never thought I would find someone who would love me, how you do, how you make me feel when you kiss me, and how I feel when I hold your hand. Seungcheol, I feel safe with you, and that’s something I never associated with love. Love was always so unrealistic to me,” you rambled and paused to look at Seungcheol, who smiled fondly at you. 

“That’s why I asked if you were real, or something I made up because I was so desperate to feel loved and to be loved,” you admitted.

Seungcheol placed his hand over yours. “You feel safe with me?” He asked.

“The safest. I feel like I’m floating. When I’m with you, I feel like you’ve taken me to a place so high, where there is nothing but love and safety,” you babbled, letting your feelings pour out and making Seungcheol smile widely at you. 

“Fuck, then, this is not a good time to say this is it?” Seungcheol said, and for a second, you felt like you had come down from the proverbial cloud you were floating on. 

“Uh, say, what?” You fumbled, and Seungcheol grinned at you before leaning over to kiss your lips softly. 

“To say that I love you,” Seungcheol admitted, making your eyes widen.  

“To be honest, I’ve been meaning to say it for a while now.I just didn’t know if it was the right time or too soon, and I didn’t want to scare you off or anything, but hearing what you said made me realise that I too have nothing to fear when I’m with you,” Seungcheol confessed, making you? at his words as you moved to crawl into his lap. 

“You love me?” You asked.

“I love you,” Seungcheol repeated, and you beamed at him. 

“I love you more.”

Four Months Later: The First Crack in the Glass

“How was work?” You asked Seungcheol one evening, and he  groaned as he flopped into your bed, wrapped his arms around your waist, and cuddled you, making you smile. Your boyfriend might have been a big shot and a fancy literature professor, but he was a giant teddy bear behind closed doors, and in moments like this, you were reminded of it. 

“You want to know?” Seungcheol asked as he sat up and stood up to take off his shirt and pull off his work clothes to change into a more comfortable pair of sweats. 

“I was teaching the kids about Sylvia Plath,” Seungcheol said slowly. 

“Oh, shit, I’ve heard of her,” you said absentmindedly, and Seungcheol let out a soft hum.

“She’s one of the greatest writers, and you’ve only heard of her?” Seungcheol asked. There was a hint of condescension in his voice, and you couldn’t help but feel like there was a hint of judgment from him. 

“Cheol, tell me about her work,” you said, trying to push down the funny feeling his words left you with. 

“I mean, what can I say? You smiled, watching him, listening intently as he fell into a soliloquy about Sylvia Plath’s writing. “The woman was troubled. Like any great artist, she used her pain to create beauty. She turned her darkest thoughts into the most beautiful words,” Seungcheol explains. 

“Who’s your favourite poet?” Seungcheol asked suddenly, and you shrugged. 

“I don’t know if I have one. Literature was something I liked, and I enjoyed everything I read. I don’t think I cared enough to love one author exclusively,” you replied, earning a grunt from Seungcheol. 

“You couldn’t have liked it enough if you can’t even tell me a favourite author. What about a poem or novel?” Seungcheol pressed, and you glared at him. 

“You sound like an arrogant prick,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol laughed and held up his hands in defeat. 

“Okay, I apologise,” Seungcheol said, but the smile on his face made you realise that he didn’t mean it. 

“I loved the play A Doll’s House,” you said, and Seungcheol’s eyes widened.

“You’re familiar with Ibsen?” He asked, unable to mask the surprise in his voice. 

“Just because I’m not some fancy fucking professor doesn’t make me stupid,” you said, inching away from him, and Seungcheol let out a soft sigh. 

“What did you love the most about the play?” Seungcheol asked. 

“I guess, like Nora, I too feel like I always need to be a certain way and that people have an expectation of what and how I should be,” you admitted, looking down at your blanket, and you felt Seungcheol pull you into his arms. 

“I hope that’s not because of my thoughtless remarks?” Seungcheol asked, cupping your face with his large hands, and you shook your head. 

“No, but I guess just life. I just see so many people my age settling down, with a family and kids, and everything, and they have a steady  job, and just everything,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol nodded, pressing a kiss to your forehead. 

“So? That’s their journey, not yours, my love. You will have all those things when it’s right. You don’t need to rush it,” Seungcheol said, and you smiled at him. 

“That’s one of my biggest insecurities, and I don’t think I’ve ever voiced it, not even to Mia,” you confessed.

“I appreciate that you trust me with it and know that it’s a feeling that I’ll keep safe with me,” Seungcheol promised his words making you melt. 

“You’re my safety net?” You asked, and Seungcheol nodded. 

“Yep,” Seungcheol responded. 

“Oh, babe, my friends wanted to meet you, so I asked them over to dinner at mine, join me? I want to introduce them to the woman, who, I quote, ‘makes me less of a miserable bastard’,” Seungcheol explained. 

“I’d love to,” you replied.“Wait, miserable bastard?” You asked, unable to fight the slight grin on your face. 

“When Yoona and I ended things, I was a miserable bastard,” Seungcheol explained.

“Um, not to rehash shitty memories…” you started to say, and Seungcheol’s soft smile turned into a harsh glare as he spoke. 

“Then don’t. I’m not interested in talking about her, and it’s none of your business,” Seungcheol snapped, and you nodded, feeling embarrassed for even bringing it up or attempting to. 

“There are some things in life we keep to ourselves, right? For all our lives, a secret we take to our grave, Yoona, is that for me,” Seungcheol explained, and you sighed in acceptance, wondering how awful that relationship could have been for him to be still so resentful. 

“I get it. You’ll never hear her name from me again,” you vowed.

“Thank you,” Seungcheol breathed out. 

“Fuck, does this dress look okay?” You asked, waltzing out of Seungcheol’s bathroom in a black cocktail dress. Seungcheol barely looked up as he placed the wine glasses on the dinner table. 

“Cheol,” you huffed, and he looked up at you. 

“My friends will like you; they don’t care about what you wear,” Seungcheol said, and you walked  over to the dining table with a sigh

“I get that, but still,” you trailed off, and Seungcheol shrugged. 

You were about to respond when the doorbell rang. “Cool, they’re here. Just be yourself. They’ll like you,” Seungcheol affirmed, and you sighed, nodding, as you watched him open the door for his guests. 

“Jeonghan, Chan, Mingyu, and Joshua, this my love, Y/N,” Seungcheol introduced you proudly, waving towards you as the four men walked into the house.You smiled and waved at them awkwardly. 

“Why don’t we get a few drinks, and then we can all get acquainted?” Seungcheol offered, and the rest agreed with nods and hums. 

“So, what do you do?” Jeonghan asked. 

“Well, I’m a web designer, so I do a lot of freelance work,” you explained, and Jeonghan nodded, smiling. “That’s incredibly impressive,” Jeonghan complimented. 

“What do you do?” You asked, and Jeonghan took a sip of his wine before answering. 

“I also work with your boyfriend, except I teach law,” Jeonghan replied, and you nodded. 

You were about to reply when you were suddenly interrupted by Seungcheol. “Oh, Jeonghan, don’t bore her; she’s not into the academia,” Seungcheol said. You knew he meant no harm by it, but it made you feel like an idiot. 

Did your boyfriend think you weren’t smart enough to converse with someone other than him? 

“Well, everyone likes criminal law, murders, and stuff,” Jeonghan joked, attempting to ease the tension, as he noticed how your face fell with Seungcheol’s comment. 

“I know, I love watching crime documentaries,” you added. “Same. What would you say are your favourites? Forensic files?” Jeonghan asked. 

“Y/N, you know that watching a documentary on crime, especially an extremely overproduced TV show, does not mean you understand the details of the law. You watch crime shows because you find it cool, but Jeonghan teaches the law. He respects and appreciates it immensely,” Seungcheol added, and you baulked at his words. 

“Ignore him, Y/N, this pompous literature professor thinks that if you don’t like Sylvia Plath, you’re a disgrace as a reader. Seungcheol can’t understand that while her work is untouchable, it’s too much, and that’s not a mark of one’s intelligence. Rather what they like,” Jeonghan said. His last words were directed to Seungcheol and were emphasised with a particularly intense glare at him. 

“Cheol, why don’t you look after the kids? Yeah, I think Joshua said something about replacing all your vintage books with decoys,” Jeonghan offered, and you were thankful for his comment as Seungcheol stalked off to the kitchen. 

Jeonghan looked at you sympathetically before motioning for another man to join you in the conversation. He looked younger, and he had a bright smile. 

“This is Chan. He’s the baby of the group,” Jeonghan said, and you couldn’t help but think that his words were a dig at you, but you saw no malice in his voice. He just wanted you to meet another face. 

You started a conversation with Jeonghan and Chan; this time, it was just about lighthearted topics. Thankfully, Seungcheol didn’t interrupt with a patronising comment. 

“Dinner’s set!” Seungcheol announced, and you sighed. You finally felt better about what happened between you two earlier, but you decided to swallow your pride and join him at the dining table. 

“No way you did all this, Cheol,” A man you vaguely remember called Mingyu mumbled, and Seungcheol laughed. 

“True, my love here..” Seungcheol said as he moved closer to you and wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you in to kiss your cheek softly. 

“She helped. I would have burnt the bloody house down,” Seungcheol said.You took a deep breath before nodding in agreement. 

You decided you’d chalk up Seungcheol’s initial crappy behaviour to him just being nervous, and maybe he just wanted to save you from a boring conversation but just had a terrible way of executing his plan. 

You’d let it go and try to enjoy the rest of the night. 

Except, that didn’t go to plan. Several minutes into the conversation, Seungcheol’s grip on your hand loosened, and by the time dessert was placed, Seungcheol had his chair tilted so that his back was facing you and no longer looking at you or engaging you in the conversation. 

You felt awkward. Everyone in the room knew each other except you. You were the odd one out, and your boyfriend seemed completely fine ignoring you, too. You didn’t want him to coddle you, but you didn’t expect him to turn his back on you. 

You placed your hand on Seungcheol’s back once to get his attention, but he merely shrugged it off, and you felt tears threatening to spill, so you politely and wordlessly excused yourself, not that anyone noticed. 

You excused yourself to Seungcheol’s study, where you found yourself a bottle of wine, and decided to sip that and stayed all night and didn’t emerge until after dinner and his friends left. 

“Hey, I thought I’d find you here. Why didn’t you join us for dinner? I told them you came down with a headache, but I got to say you didn’t make me look good, doing that,” Seungcheol explained as he walked into his study, and you rolled your eyes at him as you took another sip of your wine. 

“I just wanted to introduce you to my friends, and you just decided you couldn’t be bothered?” Seungcheol scolds, and you scoff. 

“Why are you so pissed off?” Seungcheol asked as he sat across you, and you stood up and walked over to the window. 

“I’m not pissed off. Who said I was pissed off?” You said sarcastically, and Seungcheol sighed.

“You’re acting pissed off,” Seungcheol added. You sighed before speaking. 

“You acted like I was a fucking dumbass; what the hell was the comment you gave to Jeonghan? That I’m not into academia, or that I can't understand the law because I watch a Netflix show about crime? You made me look like a fucking moron,” you spat.

“Look, whenever I try to show you anything about my work, you get bored, and you either fall asleep or can’t keep up. I was trying to save you that with Jeonghan,” Seungcheol replied, and you stared at him in shock. 

“I don’t fall asleep because I’m not interested. I fall asleep because you talk to me like a student. You lecture me; if you spoke to me about your work the way you do with your friends, with that same enthusiasm, then maybe I’d pay more attention, but you fucking don’t!” You shot back, making Seungcheol sigh. 

“So, what was I meant to do? Let you try and have a conversation with Jeonghan about the law, something you know nothing about?” Seungcheol asked, and you nearly slapped the smug look off his face.

“Fuck you. You don’t need to have a master’s degree or prior knowledge about a subject to be interested in it and for fucks sake. I just wanted to get to know your friends, but whenever I tried, you intercepted the conversation with a comment that just made me sound like a fucking child,” you yelled at him, and Seungcheol groaned. 

“This was meant to be a good night, and you’re making it all about you,” Seungcheol mumbled. 

“Me? How? You barely acknowledged me, you turned your fucking chair around and didn’t look at me during dinner. You barely tried to include me. Your friends, they’re all older than me, and you made no fucking effort to include me,” you yelled at Seungcheol.

“You have a mouth. You could speak up. No one would stop you,” Seungcheol offered, earning a glare from you. 

“Why would I fucking do that? Whenever I contribute anything, you show up to either call me an idiot, or when I do try to get your attention actively, you fucking shrug me off. Do you know how that feels?” You asked, your voice trembling. 

“Fuck don’t cry. That’s not fucking fair. I don’t even remember the fact I shrugged you off. You can’t attack me for something I don’t even know about,” Seungcheol retaliated. 

“Fuck can you just acknowledge that you fucked up a little bit? You’re making me feel so fucking stupid,” you choked out, and Seungcheol shrugged. 

“I don’t think I’m making you feel that way. I think you’re making yourself feel that way,” Seungcheol offered, and you glared at him.

“Fine, then, if I’m so fucking stupid. Then, I should just let you be. I’m going home. I don’t want you to feel even more stupid with me around,” you snarled, slamming your wine glass down hard enough to startle Seungcheol but not hard enough to break the glass. 

You stormed out of the room as Seungcheol helplessly followed after you. “Wait, Y/N, fucking wait. It’s late, please just stay until the morning, and I’ll drop you off; I can’t drive you home yet, I’ve had too much to drink for it to be safe,” Seungcheol argued, and you scowled at him. 

“I don’t fucking need this. I can take a cab,” you said, grabbing your phone, and Seungcheol shook his head at you. 

“Not a fucking chance, not so late, please; just let me sober up, and I’ll drive you back?” Seungcheol pleaded, and you gave in.

“I’m going to clean up,” you said, shoving past him and heading into the kitchen as you started to clean up the mess. 

“Let me help,” Seungcheol offered, and you ignored him. “Babe, please, I’m fucking sorry, just let me help you?” Seungcheol asked again, and you failed to notice how close he was standing next to you. You bumped into him, managing to drench yourself in red wine. 

“Fuck,” you hissed out as the tears threatened to spill over.

“Go, take a shower, I’ll clean up,” Seungcheol said, taking the glasses out of your hands, and you nodded as you silently walked back to the bedroom and stripped, putting your black dress in the laundry hamper and stepping into the shower.

You felt the tears stream down your face. As you washed up, you started to rationalise the fight in your mind. Maybe you had overreacted, or maybe Seungcheol just got caught up in the moment, hell you’ve been guilty of that yourself when you meet your friends, so why should you hold him to a different standard?

You stepped out of the shower, wrapped yourself in one of Seungcheol’s fluffy white towels, and headed out of the bathroom to find Seungcheol sitting looking forlorn on the edge of the bed. 

“I’m fucking sorry,” Seungcheol mumbled, and you sighed as you leant against the wall. 

“I may have overreacted a bit. I just wanted to feel loved, but I get it, time and place,” you said. 

“I do love you, and tonight I acted like a fucking ass. I just wanted to impress my friends, and I did it at your expense. Can you forgive me?” Seungcheol asked. 

“I can,” you said, holding out your hand to him, which he took and walked over until he was towering over you.

“How can I make it up to you?” Seungcheol asked as he placed a soft kiss on your lips, which you gladly reciprocated. 

“Well,” you started to say as you undid the towel, letting it drop to the floor, and Seungcheol smiled at you. 

“You want to make it up to me, Cheol?” Seungcheol nodded furiously. You reached down and placed your hand gently on the top of his head and moved his head so his face was at your cunt. 

“Show me how sorry you are,” you said, guiding his head into your pussy. Seungcheol gently pushed your back into the wall. He lifted your leg and wrapped it around his shoulder. He started by placing soft kisses, gently kissing your cunt. He ran his tongue over your folds, moaning as he tasted your arousal. 

“So sweet,” Seungcheol praised and dove back in with more desperation. He moved his tongue to your clit, and flicked his tongue against it. You moaned in approval, and he continued his movements. 

He suddenly pulled his mouth away from your core, lifted you, and walked over to your bed. He laid you down gently, and his mouth found your cunt again. Seungcheol positioned himself on his knees at the edge of the bed, his tongue now reaching your entrance. He pushed his tongue inside you, and you mewled at the feeling. He shoved his tongue further into your cunt, and his hand reached your clit. 

He rubbed at the swollen nub, and you soon found yourself cumming on his tongue. Your hips bucked against his face as you rode out your orgasm. As soon as you got down from your high, Seungcheol shoved two fingers into your pussy making you squeal at the oversensitivity. 

He pushed his fingers deep inside of you until he reached a rough patch of skin, and you squealed. He smirked, and he started moving his wrist up and down, making his fingers repeatedly hit the spot inside you. It had you seeing stars. 

Your second orgasm hit you harder as you felt yourself squirt for him. You were clawing at the bedsheet for support; the way he made your body feel was incredible. He latched his full lips around your swollen clit as he furiously pumped his fingers inside you, and a few short licks and you fell apart again. 

You whimpered into the bedsheet, which was now soaking wet, and you reached your hands out for him. He smirked, and he pushed you back further onto the bed as he stripped himself. Seungcheol then climbed over and on top of you. He grabbed your legs and wrapped them around his waist. His hard cock was resting against your aching cunt. Just seeing his length made you delirious. 

He was so thick the first time you had sex with him, you couldn’t even comprehend his thickness. He made you feel so full and had indeed ruined you for other men. His length was perfect, it was able to go deep inside you, and the thickness another word allowed you to feel so good. He filled you up. You bucked your hips against him, rubbing your wet folds against his cock, and he hissed at that. He pushed himself into you, and you moaned at the stretch. 

His hands moved to unwrap your legs and positioned them around his neck. The new position allowed him to go deeper, and he pushed deep into your cunt.  His thrusts were  paced perfectly. Slow enough to make you feel every inch of his cock, and fast enough to make you moan. 

“Harder, Cheol,” you whimpered, and Seungcheol smirked. He pulled out of you and flipped you over onto your hands and knees. He realigned himself and pushed into you.

You and Seungcheol always played rough and pushed each other beyond your limits. Your pussy was making obscene noises as you had cummed so hard. He picked up his pace, knowing he would not last much longer, and his grip went to your throat. You somehow found the ability to tap his hand, letting him know to choke you harder. You liked it, and so did he. 

His grip around you tightened. He pushed into you, and you fell apart again. This time, you screamed into the pillow, and Seungcheol released not too long after you. He flipped you back over, laying you down on your back. He moved down again to your pussy, and licked and sucked. He moaned, tasting your release and his. 

He always did this; he wanted to lick your pussy after cumming inside you. You didn’t complain. A few more licks and one final suck to your entrance, and you came once again. He placed the last kiss on your cunt and pulled you into his arms. 

“I’m still so fucking sorry,” Seungcheol apologised, and you rolled over to place your head on his chest. 

“It’s okay, just don’t do it again?” You said, and Seungcheol nodded, pulling you into a soft kiss as he held you until you fell asleep in his arms. The feeling of safety was still there, but why did it feel like there was a slight tear in the safety net that was your love?

You shook it off, thinking it was expected. Couples fought. 

You two would be fine. 

“Morning gorgeous,” Seungcheol mumbled the following day as he wrapped his arms around your waist while you made tea. 

“Hi,” you replied, turning around to face him as he pulled you into a soft kiss. 

“I want to talk to you about something,” Seungcheol said, and you looked at him nervously. 

“Chill, it’s not a bad thing. Well it is, but it doesn’t affect us,” Seungcheol explained as he guided you into the living room and onto the sofa. 

“Yoona, she was my first love, my first everything. Well, not everything, but she sure felt like it. I thought she and I would be together for the rest of our lives. I proposed, and she said yes, and somewhere along the road, everything went wrong. I found out she cheated several times while we were engaged,” Seungcheol explained as you held your breath. 

“So, whenever she is mentioned, I get agitated because she ruined me and made me cynical until I met you. You make me happy, happier than I’ve been in a very long time,” Seungcheol explained, and you sighed, feeling terrible for him. 

“I want to continue making you happy for a long time, Seungcheol. I won’t ever hurt you like her,” you promised, making him smile at you. 

“I love you, and I’m sorry for last night. Look, there’s a cocktail party at the university next Friday evening. I’d like you there and want to show you off to everyone. I want to show off my girl,” Seungcheol said proudly. 

“I’d like that,” you said, placing your lips on his plush ones. 

You, too, would be fine. It was a slip-up, not a crack in the safety net—just a slip. 

“Good god, I was starting to think that Seungcheol had kidnapped you or something,” Mia joked, making you laugh nervously as she entered your apartment and hugged you tightly. 

“Why would you think that?” You asked, genuinely concerned about why your best friend had such a vivid imagination. 

“Well, you’ve only spoken to me a few times within the four months that you and Seungcheol have been dating, and I say this with as much honesty as I can. Don’t become one of those girls that ditches all her friends once she finds a guy,” Mia joked, but you knew there was some weight to her words. 

“Mia, that was in university, and it happened once. I’m not the same person anymore,” you defended, and Mia nodded. 

“So why did you want me to come over, girls’ night, or trouble in paradise?” Mia asked, and how you chewed your bottom lip nervously was enough of a tell for Mia to sigh and understand. 

“Why don’t you sit? I’ll grab the wine, and I’ll explain everything,” you explained another word, and Mia nodded as she kicked off her shoes and got comfortable on your couch. 

You handed her a glass of cabernet and held another glass for yourself as you sat down on the sofa and started telling her about every detail for the last four months. It was going well until you finished recalling the details of last night’s fight. 

“Wait, he did fucking what, and you fucking forgave him? Why because he made you cum?” Mia accused, and you cringed. You had just finished recounting the entire story of the dinner with Seungcheol. 

“He made a mistake,” you mumbled, and Mia scoffed. “A mistake is forgetting to order dessert, not ignoring your girlfriend, or treating her like she’s a bumbling idiot!” Mia fired back, making you sink into your seat. 

“Sorry, you need to talk to him about this. Sex is not an apology, and why did you forgive him? Did he just gaslight you into  forgiving him? Is that what happened? Did he say that you’re being crazy or shit like that?” Mia interrogated, and you kept shrinking in your seat. 

“Mia, shut up. Stop using such extreme words for him,” you whimpered. You didn’t like how loud her voice had gotten, and she sighed. 

“He used sex as an apology. Y/N, do you not know how big of a red flag that is? And the fact that you gave in makes it even worse because you’ve now set the precedent that he can pull this sort of shit with you, and you’ll forgive him if he makes you cum hard enough!” Mia rattled off, and you wanted to smack her if it meant shutting her up. Instead of being rational, you decided to defend your boyfriend, even if it meant doing it at the expense of hurting your best friend. 

“Mia fuck you. You were in a relationship with, what was that guy’s name, you remember, the one who cheated on you for four months straight, and you kept taking him back. You’re going to lecture me about being spineless in my relationship when you let a guy walk all over you for four months straight because you were so fucking desperate!” You snarled and regretted the minute the words left your lips because you saw how hurt overtook Mia’s face and how her lower lips trembled. 

“I haven’t seen this side of you in a while. You were like this in university, where once you fell for a guy, you became blind to his every flaw and then lashed out at anyone who tried to tell you otherwise. You know what, Y/N, you know where I live. Find me when you decide to take off your rose-coloured glasses. I can’t bear the sight of you right now,” Mia said, placing the wine glass down on your coffee table and storming out of your house. 

You felt awful, but Mia was wrong to assume that Seungcheol would use sex as an apology instead of actually apologising instead. You shook your head and sighed, finishing your glass of wine. You would reach out to Mia eventually.

“Fucking hell, you look beautiful, my love. I might just be the luckiest man alive,” Seungcheol praised as you stepped out of your bedroom. 

You wore a red evening gown that exposed enough of your chest to be enticing but also respectable for a formal event at a university. You topped off your look with makeup that brought out your best features and slipped on red strappy heels. 

“Shall we?” Seungcheol asked.You looked up at him. He was wearing a black suit, and you honestly wanted to skip the university party and have him take you right here. Now, as if he could read your thoughts, Seungcheol laughed. 

“Don’t worry, you can rip this suit off me after tonight,” Seungcheol said, making you laugh too as you took his hand and headed to the party. 

“Y/N! So lovely to see you again,” Jeonghan greeted when you and Seungcheol entered the venue. 

“What about me?” Seungcheol joked childishly, making Jeonghan roll his eyes.

“Needy, isn’t he?” Jeonghan teased, and you laughed.

“But you love me,” Seungcheol said, and you smiled

“I do,” you said, making him smile backbefore he looked  up, and he suddenly froze as his eyes fixated on a figure across the room. 

“Cheol?” You asked, noticing how Jeonghan also looked tense as both men intently stared at the figure, now making her way across the room to greet them. 

“Jeonghan, my favourite law professor, you know my students miss you dearly!” The lady joked. 

“Yoona,” Jeonghan acknowledged, and you, like Seungcheol, felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room. 

This was Yoona? 

This was the woman that broke Seungcheol’s heart? This woman, who Seungcheol failed to explain, worked alongside him. She was a colleague of his. He saw her every day at work, and nowhere during the four months did he think to mention that he still worked alongside his ex-fiancé. 

You also felt Seungcheol let go of your hand, and you could have sworn he inched away from you. 

“Seungcheol, it’s so lovely to see you, and who might this be?” Yoona asked as her gaze turned to you, making you gulp and then pale in horror as Seungcheol could not answer for a second. 

“She’s a friend,” Seungcheol mumbled, and you saw Jeonghan shake his head slightly, and you sighed at him, holding your hand to out to Yoona

“Pleasure to meet you. How do you know Seungcheol?” You asked, feigning innocence, and you heard Seungcheol fail to bite back a hiss. 

“I’m a colleague of his, and oh, I guess we have some history, actually pun intended on that.I teach art history here. Are you a prospective student?” Yoona asked, and you stared at her and looked back to see Seungcheol ’s poker face staring back at you. 

“No, I’m not a student. I’m amazed that you’d think that,” you replied, unable to keep the slight bite use a different word your tone had to it. 

“Well, what do you?” Yoona asked, and you were about to answer when Yoona beat you to the punch.

“Well, you must be a fellow academic. Our Cheol here has a type,” Yoona said as she shot you a wink and waltzed away from the conversation, leaving you a mess and Seungcheol angry. 

“Okay, I’m going to leave you two to it,” Jeonghan said as he rushed off too. You started to feel the room close in on you and you just wanted to leave.

“Would you excuse me? I need to make a phone call,” you said hastily as you ripped your arm out of Seungcheol’s hold and nearly ran out of the ballroom and outside to a quieter area of the venue until you found a secluded bench to sit on as you gathered your thoughts. 

“I thought I’d find you here,” you turned around to see Seungcheol standing, staring at you withhis hands in his pockets and looking at you with an emotion you couldn’t decipher. Was it guilt or annoyance? 

“That’s Yoona?” You asked, and Seungcheol simply stared at you. 

“The Yoona?” You repeated, and Seungcheol sighed, nodding as he walked over to stand across from you. You could not look at him. 

“What?” Seungcheol asked, and you let out a dry laugh at his ability to be so damn obtuse. 

“This is the woman who broke your fucking heart. You work alongside her, and you never once thought to, oh, I don’t know, mention that she is not only your ex but your fucking colleague?” You snarled another word, and Seungcheol sighed. 

“Grow up, adultshave to- what?” Seungcheol paused mid-speech when he saw you glaring at him. 

“Do not fucking patronise me. This is not an age issue. Your ex,who at the mention of her name, you become a frigid bastard.You failed to mention that you work with her!” You repeated, raising your voice. 

“What do you fucking expect me to do to? Run away? We met here, fuck, I’m a grown man. I can’t run from my problems!” Seungcheol shouted back, and you sighed. 

“You don’t get it do you?” You choked out. 

“No, because you’re acting like a fucking child, and I am not one. I need to deal with every situation, no matter how unpleasant it is!” Seungcheol spat. 

“Fuck, shut the fuck up about being more mature because you’re not, not even for a fucking second. How the fuck do you expect to have a future with me when your past is there in front of your eyes every fucking day, and the worst part is that you never told me. You act as if I gave you this new lease on love, but now I don’t know if that’s something you can sustain because the woman who broke your heart is your colleague. What if one day she wants to try again? How do I know that I know that you won’t go running?” You rambled, letting a tear slide down your face. 

“You’re being selfish and so fucking unfair,” Seungcheol retorted.“Do you not think so?” Seungcheol asked rhetorically

.“Fucking hell, I told you she cheated on me while I was fucking engaged. Do you think I have no dignity or some shit that I’d go back running to the woman who ruined me?” Seungcheol yelled, and you shrank into yourself. 

“Can you just do what I do, and fucking grow up and realise that in life you need to put up with people who you may not what anything to do with, but that’s what being an adult is like?” Seungcheol continued to yell, each word piercing your heart. 

“Oh, then again, what would you fucking know about being an adult? You are a 25-year-old with no fucking direction in life. You have no stable job or anything stable. In contrast, all your friends are either settling down, and you fuck, you sit at home with no motivation to go out and find yourself some work,” Seungcheol yelled, using your biggest insecurity against you.

“You have no fucking stability, and you act like a fucking child, so don’t you dare lecture me on how to behave,” Seungcheol spat and then sighed deeply when he realised what he said. 

“Y/N-,” Seungcheol started to say, and you held your hand up to him.

“No, fuck don’t, Cheol, don’t you fucking dare. You used my biggest insecurity against me. Who the fuck does that, huh?” You asked, and Seungcheol sighed, looking down. 

“As for stability, you’re right. I don’t have a ton, but if there was something that I thought gave me some semblance of stability, I thought it’d be you.I thought that at least it would you, but you aren’t my safety net anymore, are you?” You yelled, and Seungcheol looked down in shame. 

“I’m sorry. I told you seeing her makes me turn into something else!” Seungcheol weakly defended, and you glared at him. 

“No. Fuck you, you don’t get to do this. What about being an adult, huh? Being an adult means not getting set off by every situation that doesn’t favour you. Instead, it’s about finding ways to cope. It’s about setting boundaries, so your past doesn’t hurt you and hurt the people in your present,” you choked out the last word as Seungcheol took a step forward towards you. 

“Y/N,” Seungcheol started to say, and you ignored him. 

“Just fucking go back to your party. I’m going home. I’ll text you, but please leave me alone for tonight,” you said, pushing past Seungcheol.

“Please let me know when you get home,” Seungcheol said weakly, and you rolled your eyes at him. 

“I said I would, didn’t I? Now, fucking move,” you spat, storming out of the garden and out of the venue as you waited for your Uber to arrive. 

You had barely gotten home that night when you heard someone pounding on your front door. You groaned, knowing it was Seungcheol. You glared at the front door, hoping that if you ignored the incessant pounding, then he’d get the hint and he’d just leave, but Seungcheol was relentless. You knew that. 

You sighed, walking to the front door and opening it to reveal your teary-eyed boyfriend.

“Baby, can I please explain?” Seungcheol asked, and you ignored him as you let him into your house, and he closed the front door behind him. 

You started walking back into the house, Seungcheol trailing behind you. Once you were inside, you turned to him, and before you could say anything. Seungcheol dropped to his knees, hugging your waist, begging for forgiveness. You ran your hands through his hair.

“Cheol, it’s okay.” 

Seungcheol carried you to the shower, where he helped you shower and clean. He helped you dry up and pulled you into his arms once you were both curled up on the bed. 

Seungcheol ’s fingers were gently ghosting your cunt. You felt him turn you to face him; he captured your lips in his full ones. His hand finding your core, rubbing your clit, he did this till you fell apart. He repeated that almost four times until he pushed himself inside you till he came. 

You couldn’t sleep that night. Only one question plagued your mind. 

Since when did sex make up for an apology? 

You woke up the following day sore and worn out. Not just from the fight last night that left you out and alone in the cold but also from Seungcheol fucking you into the mattress. You heard faint snores from him, and you took it as an opportunity to get some alone time. You wondered, did he think sex would make up for what had happened? 

After showering and cleaning yourself up, you headed to the kitchen to make breakfast, subconsciously making breakfast for two. You were stirring the noodles waiting for the water to boil, when you felt two strong arms wrap around your waist. You felt Seungcheol place kisses along your neck, and you melted into his embrace for a second until the events of last night came back to you. 

“Cheol, can you set the table up? I’ll get breakfast ready.” You said and you felt Seungcheol press a kiss to your cheek before  running off to set the dining table. Once you made your way over with the contents of breakfast, you sat down and started to eat. 

“Baby?” Seungcheol’s voice broke the silence, and you looked up to see him staring at you. His eyes were red, brimming with tears. You felt your heart clench. 

“Y/N, I’m so sorry about last night,” Seungcheol started to apologise again; his voice was breaking as he tried to contain himself.

“Which part, Seungcheol? The part where you failed to introduce me as your girlfriend, or the part where you threw my insecurities against me, or the part where you told me to grow the fuck up?” You fumed.

“All of it, all of it,” Seungcheol said, standing up to kneel in front of you. “I fucked up so much, but,” Seungcheol started to say, and you interrupted him. 

“If you think that fucking me last night made it better, it didn’t because now I’m wondering if you think sex is the solution to all our problems,” you said. 

“Never, I just, I’m shit with words at times, and I knew that at least my actions could prove my love to you. It’s a shit thing to do, but I didn’t do it to distract you from last night,” Seungcheol replied. 

“I want to talk about everything, but I want a breakdown of everything. First, why did you pull away from me when you saw Yoona? Were you embarrassed?” you asked, your voice breaking, and Seungcheol shook his head. 

“Of course not,” Seungcheol replied swiftly, and you glared at him.

“Because all I do wonder if when you call what we have love, you never call it what it is,” you admitted, and Seungcheol sighed as he stood up. 

“Come on, let’s talk on the couch,” Seungcheol offered, and you stood up, taking Seungcheol ’s hand as you walked over to your couch. 

“I tell you, I love you,” Seungcheol said, and you nodded.

“You do tell me that you love me, but the way you do it is like it’s a secret,” you mumbled, feeling a tear roll down your cheek. 

“I get that I’m younger, and I’m not some fancy professor with a huge savings account, but the way you act at times, you act like you are ashamed of me. Fuck, for Yoona to say that you deviated from your type to date me. What does that mean? Am I some charity case, where you’ll date a non-academic girl, and then later I’ll be a notch in your belt, a funny story to tell over Christmas, with your real wife, and everything?” You babbled as you broke into a sob, and you felt Seungcheol pull you into his arm as he hugged you tightly.

“You think about a future with me?” Seungcheol asked, and you scoffed. 

“Is that all you took from everything I just said?” You asked.

“No, but it gave me hope. Look, Yoona brings out the worst in me, and you were right last night to tell me that as adults, we can let that jar us or act out because that’s life, right? Meeting people and getting to know people you may not like is life, but Yoona, at one point, was my life. She was my future until she ruined it. Every time I see her, I lash out because I’m brought back to the headspace that I was in when she cheated,” Seungcheol explained, pausing to take a breath. 

“She reminds me of every insecurity I had, she takes me back to a very dark headspace, and instead of working my way out of that, I lash out because fuck, I’m scared that it’ll happen again,” Seungcheol admitted looking down. 

“You think I’d cheat on you?” You asked.

“No, but you’re young, gorgeous, and still have so much ahead of you. I woudn’t blame you if you found someone your age,” Seungcheol mumbled, making you scoff again. 

“I’m with you, aren’t I? Unless this is your plan? Pushing me so far that I no longer want to be with you? Is that what you’re trying to do?” You asked, and Seungcheol shook his head immediately. 

“Then why the fuck is this constantly an issue?” You snapped, and Seungcheol winced slightly at your tone. 

“I guess when I first started dating you, you were so different and, in a good way, a fresh breath of air, but everyone around me started joking that maybe you know it was just a fling because we are so opposite at times. However, as the months with you progressed, I know that’s not it.I know I love you, and I’m so fucking sorry that for so long I made you feel otherwise,” 

Seungcheol paused to take a breath. “I love you, and I am serious about this. I want to make this work, I do,” Seungcheol admitted another word. 

“Then stop lashing out at me and talk to me. Stop running away from me, run to me instead,” you said softly, and Seungcheol smiled at you. 

“I didn’t mean what I said about you having no stability. It was so fucking shitty of me to use your insecurity against you. I just, fuck, there’s no excuse, I’m just fucking sorry,” Seungcheol apologised, his head hanging low. 

“Yeah, that stung. Look, how about we take a week, cool off, and I guess  catch up in a week?” You offered, and Seungcheol agreed. 

“How’s this, I’ll plan a getaway for us, and I’ll cook us food too!” Seungcheol suggested, and you laughed. 

“I’ll follow a recipe to a tee and have Mingyu monitor me?” Seungcheol proposed making you grin at him. 

“Fine, but if I get sick from your food,” you started to say, and Seungcheol laughed. 

“Then I’ll kiss it all better for you,” Seungcheol said lamely. 

“I’ll see you in a week, my love, and remind you why you fell in love with me,” Seungcheol promised as he placed a soft kiss on your lips, and you  smiled as you watched him walk away. 

You let out a breath you didn’t realise that you were holding when he walked away. You nodded to yourself. You and Seungcheol would be fine, this was a slight tear in the safety net, but you two would be fine, you convinced yourself, for it was only a tiny tear. 

“Hey,” you mumbled, embarrassed, as Mia opened her front door the following evening. 

“What, have you come here to tell me I deserve no love or something?” Mia spat, and you felt like you had been slapped, and looked down in shame. You deserved that much. 

“Mia, I fucked up. Can we talk, though?” You asked, holding the box of doughnuts in your hand, and she sighed, nodding as she let you in. 

“So, what, I’m assuming the Mr. Perfectly Wrong fucked up again?” Mia mocked, and you sighed as you kicked off your shoes and sat on her couch. 

“He was engaged in the past, and she was like his dream girl,” you said, unable to stop the way your voice trembled at recalling Yoona and realising how she was the opposite of you. She was dignified, elegant, older, wiser, or whatever other negative thought you tortured yourself with. 

“She still works with him. They both teach at the university; he never told me, Mia. I had to find out because I met her at a university event,” you mumbled, unable to stop the tear that slid down your face. 

Mia sighed as she sat down next to you, and you took it as a positive sign to launch into the story of the fight. 

“Oh, that mother fucker!” Mia swore, and you flinched at her expression. 

“Mia, he was hurt,” you mumbled, and she scoffed. 

“How many excuses do you want to give this piece of shit? I get that love is blind. I fucking do. You cruelly pointed it out to me, but let me tell you something, my love, he’s blinded you. He’s no good for you. He’s condescending, judgmental, rude, and worst of all you keep forgiving him when he gives you half-assed apologies!” Mia ranted, making you look down in shame. 

“Is that who you want to fucking be with?” Mia asked. “A man who keeps you like a secret, aman who acts like you’re a kid, a man who talks down to you?”  You sighed.

“Maybe it’s just a bad spell. He’s not like this, ever,” you defended, and Mia groaned, rubbing her forehead. 

“This man, I don’t care how good the sex is or how amazing the good moments are. The good moments aren’t enough to mask that he is inherently flawed and has a complex. A complex that he will project onto you, and you will struggle to try to meet the ideal woman in his head. Still, you’ll try all your life because that woman doesn’t exist, and not to be unkind, but it’s because that woman will never exist for him. He doesn’t know what he wants,” Mia explained, calming down as she sat down next to you. 

“He said he loved me,” you mumbled weakly, and Mia nodded. 

“I’m not denying that he cares for you, but his ego comes before you, Y/N. You will bend over backward for this man, and you have, but see if he even bothers to put in an ounce of that same effort that you put into this relationship,” Mia continued , and you glared at her. 

“You know what? I didn’t come here to be yelled at. I get enough of that from him!” You seethed, and Mia frowned at you. 

“There, right there, if you can’t even figure out what’s so fucked up about that sentence, then I don’t know what even to tell you,” Mia said.  

“We’ve hit a rough spot, but we’ll be fine,” you shouted, almost as if you were convincing yourself more than Mia. 

“You know what, I’ll be here when this illusion is broken,” Mia mumbled, standing up, and you took that as your cue to leave. 

You stormed out of Mia’s house and drove straight to Seungcheol’s. 

“Baby?” Seungcheol asked when he opened the door and saw your downcast expression. 

“What’s wrong?” Seungcheol asked, and you shook your head at him.

“Can I stay here? I know we’re meant to meet at the end of the week, but I just need you,” you asked.

“Of course, my love, you know where everything is. I just have to grade one more paper. Then I’ll join you?” Seungcheol asked. 

You were so worn out from the week's dramatics that you quickly showered, changed into one of Seungcheol ’s shirts, and headed to bed. You curled up in Seungcheol ’s bed. You smiled when you felt him join you later that night, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist.

Protecting you, never letting you go, he was your safe space. 

You woke up the following morning to something stroking your thighs, and you opened your eyes to see Seungcheol ’s head placed between your legs. He was kissing your inner thighs, slowly making his way to your cunt. 

You moaned as you spread your legs, placing them onto his shoulders. Seungcheol ’s luscious lips wrapped around your clit.

As he sucked, his pressure was perfect. He pushed in two fingers and thrust them in your cunt, as he sucked on your clit. He licked and fingered until you came around his fingers. Occasionally, he would run his tongue up and down your wet folds but always go back to your cunt. 

“Morning, princess,” Seungcheol greeted as he hovered over your body and captured your lips in a sweet kiss. It felt like the first time you slept with him. 

Passionate yet soft, you felt loved, and that was not something you felt in his embrace for a while. 

“Morning, handsome,” you mumbled sleepily as Seungcheol pulled you on top of him. You felt his cock hard and waiting. You moved and sat up and slowly sank on his length. 

“Fuck!” You let out a groan of pleasure. He felt so good inside you. You lifted your legs and started moving your hips, riding him. You felt his grip tighten on your thighs as he helped you ride him. 

You wanted to see him fall apart underneath you. You trailed your hands to his fingers, and your nails grazed his nipples, making him buck into you. You moaned as his hips pushed his cock deeper inside you. You kept riding him until you felt him still and released inside you. You sighed, feeling his warmth fill up your cunt. You hadn’t cum yet, and Seungcheol knew that. 

“Princess, over here,” Seungcheol motioned to your mouth, and you moved, legs shaking as you sat on his waiting tongue. Seungcheol, as always, licked you clean of his cum. 

You both were still in bed in the afternoon, simply embracing and kissing each other, when Seungcheol spoke, breaking the silence. 

“So, do you want to make the trip a little earlier?” Seungcheol asked, and you looked at him, smiling. 

“Can you take leave on such short notice?” You asked. 

“Baby, it’s reading week for the students, so yes, I don’t need to worry about them for now. I want to focus on us.”

~~A Trip Upstate~~

“Got everything?” You asked Seungcheol for the fifth time. You had to stop yourself from laughing as your boyfriend kept going back and forth between his apartment and his car, forgetting something with each trip. 

“Wait, oh, for the fucking love of god. I forgot the car keys,” Seungcheol groaned as he ran back into the house, and you laughed at him some more. You were still laughing when he came back. 

“Hi,” Seungcheol said sweetly as he wrapped his arms around your waist, capturing you in a warm hug. 

“I like seeing you like this, happy and laughing,” Seungcheol said, making you smile at him. 

“Well, you make me laugh and happy,” you admitted, placing your chin on his chest and looking up at him. 

“I’ve been fucking that up a lot, but I promise you, this time I won’t fuck up. I love you, and I need to get back to showing you that it’s not an empty promise,” Seungcheol spoke, and you reached up to pull him into a soft kiss. 

“I love you, and thank you,” you mumbled against his lips. 

“Shall we, my love? There’s a nice cabin I want to take you to upstate, and it has our names written on it,” Seungcheol said , and you nodded as he helped you into the car. 

The drive up to the cabin was filled with jokes, laughter, and a few kisses here and there. It felt normal. Like you finally got your Seungcheol back, like all the fights could be forgotten because he was back to normal here. However, that hope ended the second you and Seungcheol started fighting over how to cook a dish. 

“Why are you so mean about this? I’m helping you; you don’t even know how to peel a fucking onion!” You snapped at Seungcheol, who was crushing the microwavable rice packet. 

“I might not know how to peel a fucking onion, but at least I’m not a 25-something that has no fucking direction in life!” Seungcheol spat back, making you exhale deeply. 

“Y/N,” Seungcheol started to say, and you glared at him. 

“No, Cheol, what the fuck, what the actual fuck? You’ve been using my insecurity against me twice now, and what-do you think each time you apologise, I’ll come back crawling? Or something? I’m tired of this, and I’m,” you took a deep breath to collect yourself. 

You would not let Seungcheol see you fall apart, not when he was the reason behind the tears. 

“We’re done,” You stated calmly, glaring at Seungcheol, who didn’t dare follow you as you walked away,.You grabbed your overnight bag and called an Uber, heading out of the cabin. 

You weren’t sure if you had properly ended the relationship between the two of you, but you were tired of constantly giving him the benefit of the doubt, and for him to only shatter it the second he felt remotely attacked. 

1 Month Later: The Breaking Point 

“Don’t you fucking dare,” you mumbled to Mia, who had picked you up from the floor of your house last night. You had called her on your way back home, and thankfully she didn’t ask many questions, and just tried to help you. 

Since you left Seungcheol, you didn’t know where you two stood. He made no effort to contact you, so you just assumed that since you yelled. “We are done,” at him, that you were. 

Seungcheol took the hint and left you, but what pained you the most was that he could never run after you. 

You craved his touch, his voice. You wanted him, but his lack of effort made you think he wanted nothing to do with you. Were you just a waste of time for him? 

You thought that what you two had was a masterpiece, or what was that before he tore it all apart? Or was it you? Were you the one who tore it all to pieces? 

All that to say, you had held yourself together, well, or at least you could put on a happy face. You just plastered on a fake smile and went on about your day. You put your efforts into your job out of spite. 

You wanted to prove to Seungcheol that you weren’t some bumbling idiot, but instead, you were a 25-year-old with things going for her. You wanted him to see you wanted him to be proud of you, but he wasn’t here to see it. Maybe he never cared. 

Your breaking point was this afternoon. You had just secured a huge contract, and just as you had signed on the dotted line, you wanted to share it with Seungcheol. You froze mid-text when you realised that he wouldn’t care. He wouldn’t care if you had done something remarkable because you two were done, so why should he care?

So, you started bawling at home and shakily dialed Mia’s number, and that’s when she came to your rescue. She came to find you when you were at your lowest, and you felt guilt engulf you. You had defended Seungcheol to her, insulting her viciously, but she never batted an eyelid. 

“You know most people say thank you,” Mia joked, and you sighed.

“I am thankful, trust me, more than you know. I know you want to say I told you so, so go for it,” you snapped, and Mia shook her head as she helped you sit on the couch. 

“He lost the one real thing he had. That’s not on you. He never fought enough for you,” Mia explained as she pulled you into a gentle hug, which made you blubber and, thus, make you cry more. 

“Nothing, nothing from him, for a fucking month, Mia! Nothing. I thought he loved me and saw a future with me and all that bullshit, but he did not fucking bother, not once, to even be like, are you okay? Nothing, he just, fuck, wait, I think my phone is ringing in the bag. Can you help me grab it?” You asked, and Mia nodded, scrunching her nose at the private number. 

“I swear if it’s that fucker calling through a random ass number to get to you, he’s going to get the living lights smacked out of him,” Mia threatened as she handed your phone to you. 

“Hello?” You answered. 

“Hello, Miss Y/N. We have been given your number as an emergency contact. Do you know Mr. Choi Seungcheol ?”

“I’m sorry. Who are you?” You asked, your voice trembling. What happened to Seungcheol?

“Sorry, I’m Nurse Lee. I’m calling from the Seoul National Hospital. We have been given your number as an emergency, so we are calling to ask if you could come down and sign a few things for us?” You sighed in relief, but only slightly. 

You got into your car, not caring if you got a fine for speeding. You reached the hospital and parked, running in your heels to the main lobby. You frantically explained that you got a call and were quickly ushered upstairs to the wards. 

You heard laughing and opened the door to see your ex-boyfriend laughing with the doctor. His eyes widened as he saw, and just like that, his laughter faded. The doctor noticed your presence, and he waved you in.

“You must be Y/N. Thank you for coming here. We just need to discharge him, and we need you to sign a few forms for him.” You nodded, still confused, “I’ll be back in around thirty minutes. I’ll let you two catch up.”  The doctor left the room and left you both alone. 

“Cheol?” You said softly. 

Seungcheol wasn’t looking at you. You walked to his bedside when you saw there was enough space. You sat down slowly and held his face in your hands. He reluctantly looked at you. 

“What happened?” you asked. You let go of his face so he could talk. 

“It’s not a big deal,” He said. You rolled your eyes. 

“It is, especially if you’re in the hospital.” You countered. 

“Don’t laugh.” He said, warning you. You nodded. “So, long story short, I may have dropped a knife on my foot.” You looked at him, perplexed.

“How?” “I was cooking, and it was going well. Then the knife slid off the counter and onto my foot. I didn’t lose a toe, just a lot of blood. So yeah, by the time I got here, I passed out from blood loss, and I guess that’s why they called you.” He blurted in one go, and you tried to stifle a laugh.

“Seriously?” He said, but you could hear the smile in his voice. His heart warmed at the sight of you smiling. It had been so long since he was the reason for your smile. 

“I’m so sorry, but why were you trying to cook?” You asked. 

Seungcheol ’s laugh faded, and he paused. “I noticed a lot about me that I’m not good at. Cooking is at the top. I felt as if I could attempt to conquer that maybe I can do more in life,” Seungcheol looked down at his hands covered in wires. You touched his thigh, making him look at you. 

“You are good at so much,” you countered, and Seungcheol shook his head.

“Professionally, maybe, but my personality? No. Nothing great there,” Seungcheol said, resignation lacing his tone. You opened your mouth to say something, and Seungcheol spoke first. “I’m not saying this to guilt-trip you into taking me back. After you broke up with me, I started seeing someone,” your hand jerked away from his thigh, which confused Seungcheol until he saw the heartbreak on your face. 

“No, Y/N. I meant seeing a professional,” Seungcheol said, laughing.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, unsure what you were apologising for.  

“If you think I’m even close to being able to move on from you, you’re insane.” 

“Come on, let me drive you home?” You said, Seungcheol nodded. 

“I appreciate it, thank you.” 

While driving, something occurred to you, and you had to ask. “Cheol, um, how come I was your emergency number? Last I remembered, you said it was Jeonghan?” Seungcheol blushed and scratched his neck. 

“Uh, well, it’s embarrassing now, but I changed it three months into us dating,” his confession, making you almost drive through a red light. 

“Why?” 

“Ugh, I sound so stupid because we’re not together, but I guess I wanted you to know I trust you. I know my actions during our relationship were deeply contradictory to that. I also knew that you would be the one for me.” 

“The one? In three months?” You asked. 

Seungcheol smiled fondly at you. “Can you pull over?” 

Seungcheol fished out his wallet, looked for something, and pulled out a small silver ring. 

“Seungcheol, what the fuck?” 

“Trust me; it’s not a proposal. I don’t think I’ll be that lucky. I just thought it was something I should get after three months. I wanted to give this to you, but then I hurt you so many times after, and each time, we tried to make it work, and I kept on fucking it up for us. It was a promise ring that I’d never hurt you again, and I guess I failed.” Seungcheol admitted, and you noticed a tear fall down his face. 

“Why do you still have the promise ring?” You asked. 

“Wishful thinking, I guess?” Seungcheol replied.

“I miss you,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol heard you.

“We can try again,” you offered weakly. 

“No, not yet. Let me learn. Let me be a better man for you. If I can’t, then know you deserve so much more,” Seungcheol spoke, and you smiled softly at him. 

You resumed driving. Upon reaching Seungcheol ’s house, you pulled up and helped him out of the car and into his apartment. You laughed when you saw the floor covered in blood. It was not a normal reaction, but the backstory was quite amusing. 

“Hey, Cheol, why don’t you lie down? I’ll clean this up for you?” You said. 

“No, I can manage,” 

You glared at him. “Trust me,it’s safer that I do this,” You laughed as you watched him hobble to his bedroom. Thank goodness he didn’t live in a multi-story house. 

After cleaning up, you found Seungcheol sitting in his bed, playing music and softly humming. You knocked on his door. Seungcheol smiled and waved you in. 

“Hi.”

“Blood’s gone,” you said, and he patted the space next to you, and you sat down on the bed next to him. 

“Thank you. Somehow, you’re always cleaning after my mess.” 

“Seungcheol, don’t,” your voice firm. 

“I cannot even begin to tell you how sorry I am. Fuck, come here,” he patted the space in front of him. You carefully moved and sat between his legs so as not to hurt his bandaged foot. Seungcheol pulled your hair to the side, kissing softly on the nape of your neck. 

“Just please, don’t break me apart again because I don’t think I’ll recover anymore if you do,” you pleaded, and Seungcheol turned you around in his embrace so that you faced him. 

“Never again, I promise,” Seungcheol promised. bullshit

“Okay, so where is your boyfriend?” Mia asked, venom dripping off every word, and you rolled your eyes at her. 

“He probably got caught up with work. Can you fucking let it go?” You asked, and Mia shrugged. 

“I’m just saying, for a man walking on thin fucking ice, he better at least bother with his girlfriend’s birthday party,” Mia stated before walking out of the room to place balloons in another part of your apartment. 

You sighed, knowing she was right, but Seungcheol was busy. Maybe he’d be late, but he’d show up. You kept telling yourself this until midnight when he never showed up, but you were  several drinks in and had enough liquid courage to storm over to his place, which is precisely what you did. 

You hailed a cab and made the drunken journey to his. 

Your conscience was warning you. You paid no attention. 

Yousure as hell ignored it for long enough. You could continue to do so. 

You knocked on the door, and the door opened to reveal a shirtless Seungcheol in a pair of black sweats. You had lost all sense of rationality, and at this point, you didn’t know what was right or wrong. 

“Y/N?” Seungcheol asked, confused, as would anyone. He couldn’t help but take in your appearance, how your cleavage left little to the imagination, but he knew the reality was better, how your heels made your ass seem even rounder. Your face was beautiful as always, but your mascara had run slightly, and your nose was red.

“Can I come in?” You asked. He nodded quickly, letting you in and closing the door behind him.

Seungcheol slowly guided you to the sofa, and he sat down, waiting for you to sit beside him. Instead, you straddled him, your legs on either side of his hips. 

“My birthday. I got a crappy, “happy birthday” text from you, and you don’t show up to my party. What the fuck is wrong with you? This is not the attitude from someone who wants another chance,” you fumed, and Seungcheol stared at you sighing. He had no excuse, none whatsoever. 

“Y/N, I—” You shut Seungcheol up with a kiss. You rolled your hips against his crotch, and you could feel that underneath his sweats, he was naked. No boxers. You could partially feel his cock against your lace-covered cunt. 

“Y/N, I, what’s going on, fuck,” Seungcheol stopped speaking as you started sucking his neck, gently grazing your teeth against his neck andmaking him whimper for you. You felt his cock harden fully underneath you. You pulled away from his neck for a moment. 

“Cheol, at this moment, I need to forget that I’m mad at you,” you admitted, and Seungcheol sighed before nodding as his grip on your thighs tightened. 

“I’m not saying no; you don’t need to apologise, and you don’t need to leave, but we need to talk when we’re done,” Seungcheol added. 

“I will.” 

“Good.” Cheol stood up from his position and carried you into the bedroom. And he noticed your makeup had smudged and brought you to the bathroom. He placed you on the counter, his lips immediately finding yours. Kissing you, his lips pulled and sucked on yours. You moaned, allowing him to slip his tongue inside your mouth. 

Seungcheol deepened the kiss. His hands found the straps of your dress; he pushed them down. You hissed as your breasts met the cold air of the room. Seungcheol helped you out of the dress, leaving you in your soaked underwear. He groaned at the sight. His hands went to your legs, pushing the heels off your feet, his lips never leaving yours. He moved his hands to your underwear and pulled it off. He groaned when he saw how wet you were. 

He pushed his sweats down and undressed; he stood erect and naked in front of you, and you took a moment to drink in his appearance. Seungcheol guided you into the shower, and you let out a moan, when you felt the warm water hit your skin. Soothing you, you felt Seungcheol turn you around and push your back against the wall. He placed kisses down your neck, his lips finding your breasts. He sucked and nibbled your nipple as his other hand massaged and squeezed and tugged the other breast. Cheol moved his body down yours as his lips found your cunt. 

Seungcheol placed a soft kiss. He gently lifted a leg and wrapped it around his broad shoulders. He pushed two fingers inside of you, groaning at how wet you were, where he could practically taste your arousal. He angled his fingers inside you and started to finger you, and his lips found your core, as he ran his tongue against your folds. 

He pulled your clit between his teeth, gently grazing the swollen bud. You whimpered. He replaced his teeth with his plush lips. Wrapping them around your clit and sucking as his fingers pounded into you. He kept his movements up until you came. You tightened against his fingers, and your clit throbbed in his mouth as he helped you ride out your orgasm. 

Seungcheol gently unhooked your leg from his, and you sank to your knees. You pushed against his toned abs, and his back hit the shower wall. You wrapped your lips around his cock; he was thick. While your hands wrapped around the remainder of his length, you took him and started to suck him. He let out a low growl and a strangled whimper as you continued to suck him. You grazed your nails along his thighs and whimpered, bucking his length into your throat, making you gag slightly. You kept sucking until you felt him still and releasein your mouth. 

You smirked as Seungcheol was panting. He pulled you two on your feet and into a sweet kiss. He cleaned the both of you up, his hands finding your face and washing the smudged mascara off your face. He guided you out of the shower and to his bed. You moaned as you felt the soft sheets against your naked body. 

Seungcheol couldn’t get enough of you. His eyes drank you in. His mouth was desperate to taste you again. He approached you, lifted your legs, and placed them on his shoulder. His mouth found your cunt again. He started by placing soft kisses against your cunt, knowing where to lick you. 

He wasted no time. He dove straight in, his thick tongue flicking against your swollen clit. Your hands made their way into his hair. He pushed in three fingers this time. He lapped at your arousal while you whimpered in oversensitivity. It didn’t take much after that for you to cum on his tongue. 

Seungcheol rubbed his cock against your wet folds several times and then pushed in. You hissed as the stretch was quite intense after two orgasms, but he felt so good. You tugged on his hair, making him look up at you. You brushed your thigh against his hardened length, and he wasted no time. 

“Move”, you whispered, and that’s all it took for Seungcheol to lift your legs and place them on his shoulders, allowing him to hit deeper inside you. His thrusts were rough, and each time, he would withdraw only to push back harder and deeper. 

He leaned down and captured your lips in his. You melted into the kiss while he pounded into your cunt. You were a mumbling and moaning mess underneath him. You felt yourself clench around this length, making him groan into the kiss. He pushed a few more times until you fell apart on his cock. 

He pulled out of you gently and laid down beside you. 

You woke up a few hours later, not realising you had fallen asleep. 

You woke up to at least thirty texts and missed calls from Mia, and you sighed, stepping out of Seungcheol’s bedroom to call her. You quickly told her what happened last night, and Mia could only relay her disappointment. 

“Do you not see how far gone you are, Y/N; you’re making excuses for him. People like him don’t do this just once.” 

“He was busy and couldn’t make it,” you explained, and Mia scoffed. 

“Y/N, I’m telling you as someone who has been through something like this. He will leave you broken.” You scoffed, and your following words were nothing but pure venom. 

“Mia, you had a relatively hot boyfriend, and he dumped your ass. So I guess you’re not too different to me since the only thing you’re good for is looking the way you do. You couldn’t keep him either..” You kept your voice stern and firm. 

Mia groaned. “I won’t ever say I told you so, but when the inevitable happens, you know where to find me. I’ll listen because I know you won’t.” With that, Mia hung up. 

You sank to the floor.  

How did a loving relationship with your boyfriend leave you so drained and lashing out at others to defend him? What went wrong?

“Hey, did I interrupt something?” Seungcheol asked, startling you, and you stood up, shaking your head. You didn’t want to get into it with him right now. 

“Here,” Seungcheol said, handing you a coffee mug, and you nodded, taking it. 

“You’re right. My actions last night weren’t of a boyfriend trying hard to prove that he’s worthy of being with you,” Seungcheol explained, and you rolled your eyes. 

“I’m tired of hearing you apologise. I need you to show me that you’re fucking sorry,” you said . 

“What about a date tomorrow? There’s a gala at my university. Don’t worry, it won’t be like last time, I promise,” Seungcheol begged, and you sighed, nodding. 

You weren’t exactly sure what made you want to give him a second chance, but maybe because you loved him or the idea of him, you weren’t entirely sure which one. You just knew that regardless of what the situation was with you two. With him, it still felt like home somehow. 

DIVDER:

You and Seungcheol walked hand in hand to his gala; this time, he wasn’t distant, curt, or moody. He was jovial, greeted everyone, and introduced you until Yoona entered the picture. 

Seungcheol wasn’t flirting, but he sure as hell didn’t bother to hide how happy and  excited he was to see his ex, considering he spent nearly 45 minutes talking to her. You stormed out of the venue and waited by his car until he noticed.. oblivious to your anger. 

“Waiting long?” Seungcheol asked, and you scoffed.

“I’m amazed you remembered I existed. You seemed to be taken by Yoona. I thought I was a distant memory,” you mocked, earning a glare from Seungcheol. 

“Let’s just go home, yeah?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded, following him into his car.This time, he didn’t help you in.“When the fuck did I give you a reason to think I’d cheat? How many times do I need to fucking tell you that Yoona and I are done?” Seungcheol bellowed suddenly, and you sighed. 

“That’s not the fucking point!” You yelled back, and Seungcheol sighed, loosening his tie.  

“The point is that you always gloss over our problems, you always act like I’m a child or something, and you never tell me the truth. When I get mad, you act like I’m insane even to be upset. Do you know how that fucking feels?” You yelled, and Seungcheol glared at you.

“Not my fucking problem thatyou don’t understand how the fuck relationships work, or maybe you’re too fucking immature to make one work,” Seungcheol hissed as his grip on the steering wheel only got tighter. 

“This is so fucking rich coming from you considering the fucking fact your ex dumped you, and yet you’re so obsessed with her that you didn’t care that she cheated on you. Instead of spending the night with me, someone who loves you, you cosied up to someone who walked all over you!” You yelled. 

“Y/N, get out of the car before I make you!” Seungcheol yelled, making you whimper at his tone and words. 

“Seungcheol, please, I’m so sorry,” you were begging, but Seungcheol ignored you. He leaned over and opened the car door. You looked at him; his eyes were trained on the road ahead. 

“Seungcheol, please don’t do this,” you begged. You knew you couldn’t change his mind, but you were scared. He didn’t seem to care. You reluctantly exited the car, gently closing the door behind you. Seungcheol wasted no time, and he sped away, drove off, and left you alone in the dark. 

You were freezing, and your outfit did nothing to counter the cold. You let out a sob, your feet in absolute agony from the heels, and your mind an emotional mess. You pulled your phone out of your purse to call someone. You called Seungcheol, no response. You sighed more. Seeing as he would ignore you the entire night, you called the last person you could think of.

“Y/N? What? It’s two in the morning. What do you want?” Mia’s voice was hoarse and laced with sleep. You tried to reply but couldn’t help the whimper that escaped your throat. 

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Mia asked, her voice now concerned. 

“I don’t know where I am, and it’s dark and cold. I’m so sorry for disturbing you. I shouldn’t have—” 

“Y/N, stop, pin me your location. I’m coming to get you,” You sobbed out a thank you and sent her your location. 

Around twenty minutes later, you saw a car enter the empty street, and it screeched to a halt suddenly. Mia stepped out with a coat and ran towards you. She wrapped the coat around your body. She didn’t ask questions; she just guided you to heris car. 

“Let’s get you home,” Mia said. She was fuming, but she was scared that if she yelled at you now—which she surely would, she’d break you into two. 

“Do you want me to come in?” Mia asked as she pulled up outside your apartment, and you shook your head. 

“I just need time alone, but thank you, Mia,” you said, who nodded as she watched you leave the car before waving to you and driving off. 

“Baby! You’re safe!” You turned around to see Seungcheol running after you, and you sighed as you walked into your apartment. Seungcheol followed you, and this scene was one you knew all too well.

“You threw me out of the car!” You yelled the minute you were inside the apartment. 

“I was scaredI’d say something worse if you stayed. I was trying to mitigate further damage.” 

You rolled your eyes at him.“You’re a fucking moron.”

“I am, but I came back, I—” you interrupted him. 

“For what? To apologise?” You asked, and you hated that hope still coated your words. 

“No, because I can’t do this anymore. I can’t, you’re acting so fucking immature, but we’re not good for each other. I need someone who gets me. I can’t coddle you every five seconds because you got your fucking feelings hurt,” Seungcheol said, finality lacing his words. 

“So, if we were closer in age, we would have worked?” You asked, and Seungcheol sighed, nodding. 

“I’ll send someone for my things, and I’ll mail your things back to you by the end of the week,” Seungcheol mumbled as he walked out of your apartment. 

He left as quickly as he came into your life. You’d experienced heartbreak before, but nothing like this. You wanted to die. You tried to stop feeling because the pain manifested into physical pain as you felt your entire body go numb and limp. You couldn’t handle it, and you felt all too much all at once. 

The Reeling

It had been two weeks since Seungcheol broke up with you and after he returned your things to youin a box with no goodbye letter and nothing to give you any semblance of closure, you impulsively booked a train ticket to see your folks  

If Seungcheol didn’t want to coddle you, you tried to find comfort in the two people you knew would. 

“Y/N?” She was confused by how upset you were. Your mother practically yelled when she saw you at the front door, and you burst into tears the minute she saw you and hugged her. 

“I missed you,” you cried into her arms while she was happy to see you. 

“Come in. Why don’t you go to your room freshen up?” You nodded.

“Hi, stranger.” You said, scaring your father, who was too engrossed in a crossword puzzle.

“Y/N!” He yelled, standing up to hug you. 

“Oh, who’s ass do I need to kick for you crying?” You shook your head. 

“No one, I just missed you guys,” you lied, and your parents nodded knowingly. 

“Freshen up, honey. We’ll be right here with food and a drink?” You nodded at your mother and headed to shower

“Seungcheol,” You answered your phone that was ringing. You had just gotten out of the shower and were drying your hair. 

“Uh, hi. Sorry, I wanted to pick up my hoodie. I left it at yours, but you weren’t there, and I just wanted to check when you’d be back so I could get it?” Seungcheol asked, so casually, so casually cruel. 

At least he was honest. You knew nothing was left there anymore,

“I’m visiting my folks; I’ll send it to yours when I’m back,” you said, keeping your tone neutral and devoid of emotions. 

“Cool. Thanks,” Seungcheol said, hanging up before you could get a word out. 

You broke down again. He called you, only to break you all over again. 

“So, it’s a boy problem? It’s got to be,” your father mused after dinner. You two and your mother were in the living room, sipping wine and catching up. 

“I was a fucking idiot. I gave him a chance after chance,he walked all over me, and I let him because I loved him,” you whined to your parents, who smiled sympathetically at you. 

“I would rather you didn’t call yourself that. I didn’t raise one.” You smiled at your dad’s attempt to be funny. 

“Well, I was,” You sighed, sipping the wine. You decided you’d tell your parents everything aside from the ridiculous amounts of sex that led you up to this moment. 

“Why did you want to try so hard to keep him?” Your mother asked, and you shrugged. 

“Because I loved him, or so I thought I did, but love shouldn’t hurt this much,” you mumbled. “You know what? I was right when I believed that love is this huge thing that doesn’t exist, and aside from you two, I don’t see it anywhere.” You said, and your parents smiled softly, 

“Honey, love isn’t easy. It takes so much effort and time to get it right, and even then, you can screw it up.” 

“Then what, I screwed up?” You accused, and your mother shook her head. 

“No, you tried and broke yourself into two to become someone he wanted. That is the furthest thing from love. It’ll hurt, but one day, when your paths cross again, you’ll be able to smile at him with no malice and thank him for putting you through hell because you’ll know what you never want again,” your mother explained, pulling you into a tight hug as you sobbed. 

“He couldn’t even be bothered to attend my birthday,” you mumbled, sniffling pathetically, and your father nodded. 

“That’s not a good sign, if I’m being honest, isn’t it meant to be fun, a birthday party?” Your father asked, and you could only shrug. 

“Get your hair done or something,” your mum suggested the following week. 

“Why?” You asked, and your mother smiled at you. 

“Well, isn’t that what everyone does after a breakup? Get their hair done, and you’ve been moping for a week. Go outside, go and see the colourful world out there,” your mother said, kissing your forehead. 

You laughed but decided to take up your mother’s advice, and soon enough, you found yourself in a hair salon. 

“So, how do you want your hair done?” The stylist asked as he started to towel dry your hair. 

“I’m not entirely sure, but something that screams I’m doing good and happy.” The stylist smiled.

“A few highlights and waves?” He suggested, and you grinned. You relaxed into the chair as the stylist worked on your hair. 

You smiled at your appearance in the mirror. You felt fresh. You still felt pain, but the new hair did do wonders. You’d never understand the logic, but it helped, only for a second, until a voice stopped you in the shopping mall. 

“Y/N?” Your blood ran cold, and you’d recognise that voice anywhere. 

“Yoona,” you muttered, turning around as you faced her. 

“Did you change your hair? I like it. It looks lovely!” Yoona smiled. 

“Can I help you, Yoona?” You asked, not having the energy to pretend to care. 

“I heard you and Cheol broke up?” Yoona said, and you cringed at her use of his nickname. 

“Why, are you waiting to dig your claws into him?” You snapped, and Yoona shook her head. 

“Look, I have no defense for what I did to him, but I’ll say this: There is an idea that Seungcheol has in his mind. Even if I didn’t fit that mould, should I have cheated? No, but it wouldn’t have mattered because I would never be enough for him, and neither were you. He has a version of a woman in his mind, which doesn’t exist. You dodged a bullet, my Y/N,” Yoona narrated as she walked off, leaving you speechless. 

It was on your walk that all the puzzle pieces fit together. Yoona wasn’t wrong—granted, an unreliable source—but her words weren’t exactly wrong. You bent over backward to appease Seungcheol, but nothing was enough, and if Yoona, his “ideal girl,” failed to meet his idea, then what was his ideal? 

A never-needy, ever-lovely jewel whose shine reflected on him? Was that all he ever needed: someone to make him look better? 

You smiled, turning back to see Yoona walk into another shop. Maybe she was right; it’d take a while to reconcile and face the trauma of dating Choi Seungcheol, but you knew it wasn’t you anymore. You could have been carved by the gods themselves, but unless that god were Seungcheol, you would never be enough for him, and somehow you were okay with that. 

You just needed now to heal, mend old relationships, and find yourself again, but you were a soldier who came back from war half her weight. You needed to regain strength from this, heal, and become someone who had learned from this. 

You could do it. You’d get older and wiser, while his lovers would be the same, wide-eyed and keen until he tore them to shreds when he realised they weren’t the one. 

You could move on. You’d be fine. 

The Healing: 2 Years Later 

You were fussing over your speech for the fifth time that day. 

“Girl, it’s fine, you’ve worked your ass off for this app. I can’t believe you got SNU to sponsor this. You’ve grown up!” Mia said dramatically, making you laugh. 

You two were okay again; it took a lot of healing, but you two were okay because you didn’t hurt anymore. 

You were at the launch of your newest app, a website for students and teachers to connect quickly.You wanted to pitch it to SNU, and they agreed. 

You had finally finished your presentation when your eyes locked with his. 

You flashed him a smile, and he returned one.It was like nothing you imagined at that moment. Nothing hurt anymore; he was a painful memory, but he was your past. 

You would sometimes wonder if the love affair between the two of you maimed him the way it maimed you, but you also figured that you could live without getting that answer from him. 

You’d be okay. You weren’t okay then, but you are okay now. 

You were okay before you met him, and you’d be okay after him. 

[five-and-dimes]

Off Book

Sometimes shit gets stuck in my head and I just gotta get it out. Dreamling, human au, soft smut, read on AO3.

~~~~

There is a script.

There is always a script, for everything and anything, even if Dream doesn’t always know what that script is. Sometimes he gets the words mixed up, or he gets the words right but the cadence wrong, and he’s left floundering until someone decides to cut him out of the dialog completely. 

Which. Hurts. But he gets it.

There is a script for this too.

Hob moving on top of him, hands on his hips to pull Dream back onto his cock with each thrust while Dream’s fingers curl around his shoulders. The bedframe is making little thuds against the wall, and Hob’s breath is hot as he pants next to Dream’s ear. Dream is biting his lip, because sometimes silence is more acceptable than the wrong line, and he feels the way his breath hisses through his teeth on a particularly strong thrust. Despite his best efforts, a needy, desperate whine escapes his throat. 

“What do you need, sweetheart?” Hob rasps, keeping his rhythm as he speaks, pulling back just slightly to glance at Dream’s face.

There is a right answer to his question.

Dream knows what he’s supposed to say. He knows it from porn, from oversharing friends, from partners who tried to spoon feed him his lines- You like it like this, right? I know this is what you want, I know this is what you need- until all he had to do was nod along. He knows what he’s supposed to say, he knows what’s expected, he knows the script here.

“Softer.”

He chokes the word out, and he thinks if Hob hadn’t had their faces pressed together it might have gone unheard, he might have had a second chance to get it right, to say what he knows he was supposed to- harder, faster, more- instead of pathetically pleading for the wrong thing. There are tears welling in his eyes and his breath catches in his throat as he feels Hob still. Maybe this isn’t the end. Maybe he will just have to endure rolled eyes and pointed questions designed to let him know exactly how ridiculous he was being, perhaps a few sharp comments about how weird and stupid he was. He would endure it all, gladly, to not be pushed away.

“Of course, love.”

Dream gasps, eyes snapping open when he hadn’t even been aware of clenching them closed in the first place. A tear escapes as he blinks in surprise, looking up at Hob’s gentle gaze. A flash of sadness crosses his face, followed by shining compassion as he leans down to kiss the corner of Dream’s eye, “Anything you want, sweetheart. That’s why I asked.”

People don’t ask because they want an answer. They ask to move the script forward, to follow the tracks laid down in front of them, to get to the ending plotted out in their heads already. For his whole life Dream has been taught that every interaction has one right answer and countless wrong ones. His answer had been wrong.

But Hob just smiles as he shifts them gently till they are laying on their sides, facing each other. He has one hand wrapped around Dream’s waist to hold the small of his back while the other tugs at his thigh, tangling their legs together and then petting up and down his side in long, soft strokes. 

“Like this?”

The next thrust is slow, and deep. Dream can hear himself sigh, wrapping his arms around Hob to pull him impossibly closer, burying his face against Hob’s neck just in case he fails to blink back his tears appropriately. It feels so good, and Hob is holding him so gently and fucking him softly, just like he asked, as if it was actually possible to get what he wants even when he wants the wrong thing. And he still feels certain he will do something to make it all go away.

He opens his mouth to… he’s not really sure what. To apologize, maybe. But all that comes out is a sharp gasp, and he hears Hob moan, a sound he has become so familiar with and fond of over their time together, the sound of Hob feeling good.

“God, you’re perfect,” he mumbled, a hazy note to his voice that he only got when he was truly losing himself to pleasure and Dream lets out a choked sob on the next thrust as he realizes that somehow he hasn’t messed anything up, Hob isn’t just being nice or indulging him to hold it against him later, Hob is enjoying himself just as much as Dream is.

And crying isn’t in the script either, but when Hob shifts to kiss him deeply, he doesn’t pull away at the taste of salt on his lips. He threads his fingers through Dream’s hair as they kiss, moving together languidly, no rush, no urgency. By the time they both come, Dream’s tears have dried, and Hob still hasn’t let him go.

As they clean up- still quiet, still slow- there is a part of Dream that wonders if this is just a new script for him to learn and eventually get wrong. As they curl up in bed together- still gentle, still soft- a larger part wonders if maybe, with Hob, there isn’t a script at all.

[r3starttt]

LOSER! DINA

DON'T BUY TLOU | PALESTINE MP PALESTINE LINKS | DAILY CLICK

AN: this is the best request I've got because?!?!?! Dina could a hundred percent be a loser, the type that's so hot and smart and funny they just get the girl?

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who refuses to wear her glasses on public because she's a hundred percent they make her look like either a grandma or a mom and not that she's against it because she'd said it herself- she'd be a milf, but she very much so rather look her age and hot.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who approaches quiet people with stupid and very annoying lines, or says "Oh, you do speak?" but somehow is so charming she gets to be friend with them and get them to overshare

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who approached to you first, no shame, no nothing. You could see her friends behind her, some meters away, ashamed or making fun of you? you couldn't really tell.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who made you realize the reason behind her friends face the second she spoke. loud words, random facts, cheesy compliments. But it all worked and she got the girl!

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who never leaves your side and definitely makes sex jokes whenever she has the chance. Like going out with friends and she needs to go to the bathroom with you and everyone's so normal about it so she has to make it awkward by saying something stupid. Or you take too long and she apologizes for it... hot tbh

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who overshares and makes people overhsare. You can't trust her with a word because- she doesn't mean it, but the words come out and people end up knowing whatever secret she was supposed to keep

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who gets hyperfixations so randomly but also so specific. Like a brand, a color, a fabric.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who forces you (not really because u agree) to do matching outfits and stuff.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who is obsessed with astrology and spiritual stuff. That's her whole personality. She knows how to read tarot, hands, auras. Anything you're curious she'll learn or use to to practice lmao

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who wants to be a cool witch SO bad.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who also gets obsessed with animals. She'd see a rabbit and believe she can have thousands. A horse? ofc she can handle. Cows? Lambs? she'd be so good just trust her.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who gets baby fever a lot but doesn't really admit it cs that's not very cool hot girl of her.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who is so romantic and cringy and clingy and just a lot? she's so intense and takes serious the special dates. You'll have the greatest birthdays and dates.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who week one and she already wanted a family with you. U-haul lesbian pls everyone agree with it

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who's the type to do baby voice when cuddling and when she gets conscious about it she really wants to rip her tongue off

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who wants to have so many hobbies but always fails because she gets overwhelmed with all the tasks. Like, she'll try to make you a handmade gift "easy" and ends up sweating and groaning because suddenly she forgot how to cook, how to sew.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who's naturally smart she needs to correct people when they're wrong. Who's a natural leader she has to offer for every task and help people- which ends up with her telling them what and how to do something.

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who believes she's the hottest human ever and people keep humbling her for it. (they're just jealous duh)

⠊ᥫ Loser! Dina who's SO horny, all the time. She's also touchy and the kind to whisper the most stupid shit on your ear and slowly make it more explicit, or do things to purposely turn you on, but she ends up needing you more.

Dina taglist: @whorefordina @hbwrelic @asraion @averyistired-62 @stevienicksrarities @aouiaa

TAGLIST?

[tragedy-of-commons]

Good morning, Gwen. Avery reblogged your event and it appeared on my dashboard, so I came running.

"You're not good enough for him. Just break up with him already." + Jean + platonic

"You're not good enough for him. Just break up with him already."

Jean feels her heart plummet in the suffocating confines of her chest, your words stoking a different kind of fear. Had she overshared too much, causing you to finally snap? Are you going to stop being friends with her for good? Will you start to ignore her when she waves to you in the street? Will you tell everyone about what a sorry person she really is?

She knew she couldn't hold a genuine friendship down for long. It was only a matter of time before you became sick of her busy schedule and secretly dysfunctional livelihood--

She's sobered from her panic by the sound of your fingers snapping a scant inch from her face. "Teyvat to Jean! Hello?"

Like you always do, you're the one to ground her when things get particularly rough. Right - she needs to actually respond; being this inarticulate isn't doing her any favors.

"My apologies," Jean breathes, fidgeting with her gloves. She actually needs to be present so she can heed your counsel. "Please continue."

"Archons, I didn't mean it like that. I'm just saying that if he constantly expects you to meet impossibly high standards, you'll never be good enough for him," you jut your thumb out from your clenched fist and swipe it across the expanse of your neck. "You need to kick his ass to the curb, and you need to do it yesterday."

Your (literal) cutthroat gesture makes Jean shift in her seat. You don't mince your words at all - but that's precisely what she needs, precisely why she came to you for advice. Lisa has a terrible habit of sugarcoating things, even when she's at her most proactive... and Kaeya is, well, Kaeya.

She rises and places a hand on the backrest of her chair, rounding it so she can gaze out of the generously sized window that brings her whole office together. The view of Mond Proper, her home, never fails to calm her down.

"...I'm not even courting him, truly," Jean explains, watching the breeze ruffle a patrolling Knight's hair before being lost in the rustling leaves of trees beyond. "My obligations leave no room for that. We're keeping our relationship casual, informal."

She can almost hear the grimace in your voice. "Casual or not, him expecting you to ditch your hobbies or dress a certain way crosses the line. You know that as well as I do. If you're looking for permission or validation, I'm giving it to you right now."

Those words immediately soothe a large chunk of her anxiety. Jean's ramrod straight posture relaxes into something much more tailored for this atmosphere - sharing a cup of (now cold) tea with you, her dear friend.

"You're right," because of course you are, "but I have no idea how to end things. Etiquette classes didn't prepare me for any of this."

You snort as she turns back around to face your judgment. "To hell with etiquette. My suggestion? Kill him," you propose with the seriousness of a soldier about to go to war.

Jean's cheeks burn hotly as she flounders, attempting to deal with your type of humor in a timely fashion. You mercifully wait for her to do so, teacup and saucer perched daintily in your free hand. In all honesty, she wishes she were more like you; brave, uncaring of what others think, the main character of your own story.

She finds it in herself to chuckle. "I value diplomacy."

"Yeah, yeah," you roll your eyes good-naturedly, "but this isn't one of your romance novels, Jean, nor is it a negotiation. You deserve to be treated with respect, full stop."

She really wishes you'd stop bringing up her guilty pleasure so nonchalantly, but then she'd be deluding herself. She also wishes that she could be as confident and point-blank as you are, even if you both share the same sentiments - hers are just hidden under many layers of propriety.

"I believe you're very wise," Jean tells you sincerely. "The people of Mondstadt should elect you as their new Acting Grandmaster."

"You know, they should. I'd have that dickhead fling of yours executed immediately. Do they do that here? If not, they should look into it."

She sighs. "I take it back."

You grin, slamming your empty cup back onto her desk with a clatter. "Really? You don't want me to flay him alive? Or exile him to Dragonspine with nothing but the clothes on his back? Oh, oh, I know! What about electrocution--"

As the sun sinks down even lower in the sky, casting the Knights of Favonius Headquarters in a truly poetic glow, Jean realizes she feels much better. She'll have to get back to work soon, but for now she'll indulge you as long as she's able.

(Electrocution doesn't sound like too bad of an idea.)

🏷️: @akutasoda, @aviiarie, @lowkeyren

a/n: hi! good morning to you too & i'm glad you chose to take part! thank you for the prompt huehuehue. i decided to go in a little bit of a different direction because i just couldn't bring myself to be too mean to reader or the lovely jean... hope you don't mind!

event post here

[fleurriee]

— earth and sea ; neteyam sully

pairing ; neteyam sully x fem!reader

synopsis ; since meeting neteyam, you had found yourself making a new friend you were comfortable around. or maybe he was starting to become more than a friend....?

word count ; 5k

themes ; fluff, tiny bit of angst

warnings ; mentions of anxiety & feeling scared of interactions (me), small dosage of reader not feeling good enough for certain things/neteyam…

author's note ; is this going too fast? a part of me feels like it is, but then the other part of me doesn’t care bc i found these two absolutely adorable & want nothing more than to just shower them in the love they deserve?? they’re soulmates, what else was i supposed to do, hmm?? also, i like to think that whilst na’vi do court their mates, they’re quite quick with it, like they just want to be mated and start a family, is this just me or i’m i thinking too much on this?? anyway, i really hope u enjoy this chapter bc it’s adorable and fluffy and ughggghhh!! apologies it took so long <33

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In the short span of time that had passed between that first day when the Sully family arrived in your home, seeking uturu and pleading for the safety of their lives, your life had slowly began to change.

Because, in all that time, Neteyam Sully, the eldest son of the two new outsiders, had been nothing but kind to you.

The conversation you’d had that one time with him, when teaching the other Sully’s how to properly travel within the waters, had clearly sent him some messages you weren’t aware of. Since then, he’d sought you out more, wanting to be a part of your company and slowly chip away the walls you’d built for protection against your own fragile heart all those years ago. You guess you should’ve known this would be happening - he did ask whether or not there was a chance you’d get along with him - and, now, he was doing everything to ensure that you did.

Neteyam picked up on your shy mannerisms, too, during this time, realising that compared to the rest of the clan he’d met, you weren’t exactly the most confident one out there. It was difficult for you to do or say or go through certain things than it was for others, but, he understood that. He understood that because he was never overbearing to you, never putting you under any pressure in anything in particular, never forcing you to do anything you didn’t want to do.

And, slowly but surely, he was right. You were beginning to get along with someone like Neteyam Sully. This boy - someone who you shouldn’t have gotten along with in the first place simply because of your stark differences, someone who you should’ve stayed away from because everywhere he went, danger followed his family - made you feel nervous. But, it wasn’t the normal feeling of nerves that would settle at the bottom of your stomach, festering and rotting themselves whole until you wanted nothing more than to claw them out. No, these nerves felt like beautiful butterflies swarming gracefully within you, ones you were slowly beginning to enjoy and seek out more of.

They made you feel more alive, and so did he.

Of course, you couldn’t have been going through all of this, basking in the territory of the unknown, without Tsireya being there and knowing about it, too. You hadn’t told her too much, not wanting to overshare, but, you’d made sure to tell her enough that you could go to her should you have the sudden need to rant or ask any confusing questions. It also wouldn’t be Tsireya if she didn’t slightly tease you whenever you were alone with Neteyam (which, actually, happened to be more times than you’d come to realise…), loving the idea of her lifelong friend slowly beginning to poke her head out of her safety blanket of a shell and become the person she really was for all to see.

As your best friend, she loved seeing you comfortable in places or circumstances you never thought you would’ve been in. Clearly, Neteyam was a good influence on you, and she was entirely too happy that the two of you had met.

But, even with the time of meeting them having passed by in a sudden blur to you, it clearly wasn’t going as fast to the rest of the world, the Sully’s included. The younger of the lot were still continuing to struggle with fully taming their ilu’s, despite the several times you all had tried teaching them. Some had it better than others (mainly the girl’s, but you weren’t surprised there), but there were still moments where even they couldn’t get it down to perfection, not to the point it needed to be at if they wanted to live within Awa’atlu.

After much deliberation, yourself and the others decided the cause of their struggles was due their breathing techniques and not being able to hold it as good as it needed to be. So, Tsireya exclaimed that it would be better to attempt to tackle that problem first. That way, they might improve in other aspects, too, arranging a day for the group of you to focus on that particular area.

Sat in a circle, legs crossed over as each of you faced one another, you showed them the correct way they should be controlling themselves within the depths of the waters. Tuk was situated in front of you, allowing you to help instruct her like you’d requested - she was a delight to teach, and you wished to continue to do so throughout her entire Metkayina training - and you were in between both Tsireya and Neteyam, a situation that fell into place subconsciously without either of you fully realising it.

Tsireya’s calming words spoke comfort over those learning, guiding them in the right direction as they each watched on in earnest, wanting to best at something they weren’t expected to all those years ago in their home. You watched with tender eyes as Tuk’s own never left the girl, doing her best to replicate her movements. Leaning forwards, you held your palm against the youngest girl’s stomach, delicately pushing it further and allowing her to even herself out as she held her breath. Even when doing so, wavering on, she sent you a small, slightly giddy smile of appreciation. It was clear she was getting the hang of it.

However, someone who wasn’t getting the hang of it like his youngest sister was the eldest one to your right. You noticed in your peripheral vision that he wasn’t doing it correctly, the way you’d been showing him, as he stuttered on his breathing and struggled to calm himself down when he felt it leave his lungs.

There was a moment of hesitation that filtered through your veins as you thought your options over, knowing what you needed to do - not only to help aid Neteyam in his exercises, but to also push yourself that little bit further. You were doing so well, especially with Neteyam, and you didn’t want things to end with him.

So, with one last lingering look around the rest of the group and taking note that each of them were focusing on their own breathing or guiding someone else, you turned a little in Neteyam’s direction, patting gently atop his arm. In an instant, he’s stopping, looking over and down at you expectantly, and you immediately feel the butterflies make their home within your stomach once more - how could they not, when his eyes only filter in your own, so intense and eager?

You watch as he leans subconsciously closer down to you, making sure that he would be able to hear every quiet word you uttered to him. This was a move that had happened recently, but one that made you feel seen. Because, Neteyam knew that you struggled with words sometimes, and when you finally gained the courage to say something, it wasn’t always the loudest. But, still, he wanted to hear every word you had to offer, and he wasn’t going to miss anything you said to him.

This time, however, you struggled to say anything, staying silent, instead. You found that the words you wished to speak, the question you wanted to ask him, was getting stuck in the back of your throat, something that happens more times than you’d like to admit. And, you hated it when this happened, because it made you look so stupid. How could someone struggle asking a simple question, when it was the easiest thing in the world?

In an instant, it’s as though your mood suddenly deflated, and you feel terrible about yourself. Your eyes gaze upon the floor, too scared to look the boy in front of you in the eyes and show him your vulnerability, despite knowing he’d understand - after all, he’d seen you go through this before.

And, when you feel one of the most gentlest taps against the top of your knee, knowing already that it had come from him, you slowly realise that you don’t need to hide from him, because in some way, he’s like Tsireya. He’s someone you can trust wholeheartedly without any worry of being judged or belittled… the only difference is there are other feelings lingering there with the Omatikaya boy, ones you’re still too scared to admit.

When you make eye contact with him again, there’s already such a soft look upon his features, the sunlight painting him in an ethereal light as he smiles reassuringly down at you. Those butterflies are back again, almost like they’d never left, and just one looked shared between the two of you had your spirits lifted once more.

You don’t think about the words you couldn’t speak anymore, simply refusing to acknowledge them and let your mood decrease again, instead pointing downwards, motioning to his stomach and looking back up at him in waiting.

It was obvious he was confused, just by the look of him - from the way his brows furrowed, questions lingering behind his gaze, and his mouth turned, trying to think of all the things you could’ve meant. So, you push your palm flat against your own stomach to help line your breathing, before motioning back over to him.

There’s a small oh that escapes his lips upon the realisation, a blush forming on his cheeks as with a giddy smile and sheepishly nodding. He gives you the space to move, watching as you hesitantly bring your hand close to him, before pushing your palm against his stomach. This is the closest the two of you have been to one another, accepting the boundaries between the two of you and never touching the other in such an intimate way.

It’s obvious the move has its affects towards the both of you, as you feel Neteyam’s breathing begin to stutter upon the contact, shaky exhales falling from his lips. There’s no doubt a darkness to your cheeks, too, as you feel everything within you begin to heat up, and you’re not quite sure how you’re supposed to react to all of this, ensuring to keep your gaze locked on your hand to further any embarrassment that might occur. Neteyam, however, simply cannot take his gaze away from your face, basking in each of your features and willing them to imprint themselves within his mind, not wanting to forget a single detail about you. You’re so ethereal to him, so beautiful and enchanting that the thought alone causes his ears to flutter and his tail to smack gently against the ground in a small burst of excitement.

His trance within your presence helps calm his breathing, and when you feel that, along with the soft patter of his tail against the sand, you bring your hand back to your person. There’s a proud smile already lingering upon your lips, happy that you had managed to help teach him something, but also happy for him having gotten better at something, too, that when you look up, only to find him already intensely gaze at you, everything falters within you. It feels as though your heart had just skipped a beat, as though your smile faltered and became a little shaky, and all that was on your mind was him.

He has gazing at you in such an intimate way even when you weren’t concentrating, when you were paying any attention… imagine how he’d look if the two of you ever had something more.

You’re only broken from your thoughts, the staring contest between the two of you not faltering, when you’re brought back to reality when he speaks up. “Thank you,” he says, breathlessly, almost as though he’s in some type of trance, words strangely quiet.

Collecting yourself to the best of your ability, you smile up at him slightly shakily, nodding, struggling to form any words due to a mixture of being out of your comfort zone and basking in the way this boy was looking at you, hoping your actions conveyed the words you wished you could say.

In that moment, too, you realised how close the two of you had gotten, your faces so close to one another, like any moment now, something else could’ve happened.

And, something might’ve done, but you would never know when suddenly, everything filters back into the front of your mind as to where you are and who you’re with. The sound of chuckles made their way to your ears, the once Neteyam-filled trance dissipating and focusing instead on those around you. Your head snaps in the direction of the laughter only to find Rotxo and Lo’ak giggling to themselves as they looked on at you two; Kiri and Ao’nung were rolling their eyes and grumbling under their breaths; Tsireya was trying to keep her ever-growing smile hidden behind her hand, and Tuk was none-the-wiser, too busy concentrating still on her breathing exercises.

“Oh, shut up,” Neteyam groans, speaking up before you can even attempt to hide away. He shoves the top of his younger brother’s head, before Lo’ak pushes him back. Before you know it, they’re shoving one another teasingly, in a way you know brothers do after, having seen ‘fights’ like this beforehand.

You find yourself laughing softly at their antics, watching as they push and shove at one another before they’re both on the ground, and your eyes subconsciously travel over to Tsireya like they always do, like they always wish to seek her out, just for one small moment of comfort. She throws a knowing look your way, one that has your cheeks heating up again, but then her smile turns gentle and tender, reassuring - after all, at the beginning of all of this, Tsireya was the one who had said that this could be good for you, and now look at where you were. Sure, things were still going to be difficult for you - you had no doubt they always would be - but, already, you were doing things you never thought you’d be able to do just months ago.

Looking back over at Neteyam as he had his little brother pinned against the ground, demanding jokingly that he apologise to him for whatever reason you didn’t know, you realised that you were slowly starting to believe that Tsireya was right.

Only a few days had passed since that moment shared between yourself and Neteyam, but somehow, it had felt like longer. In that time, you hadn’t had the opportunity to see him again - your clan were planning a small celebration together (although, they were never small when it came to the Metkayina, so you knew exactly what to expect), and your time had been taken up by helping them prepare.

A small part of you was just slightly grateful that you hadn’t been able to see him yet, mainly because you needed to get yourself together, and truly understand what you were feeling. You had an inkling, but it wasn’t like you’d felt something like this before, and you didn’t really know what to do with it.

Tsireya had obviously been a huge help, and she’d told the truth, one you knew was inevitable. You’d been thinking the same thing, and maybe you were just too scared to admit it. But, when Tsireya said what even she knew to be true, it was like everything fell into place and some things began to make sense.

Neteyam began to make sense.

So, begrudgingly, that’s why you find yourself willingly turning up to the clan get-together, secretly telling yourself that it wasn’t really because you wanted to just catch a simple glimpse of him, but because you helped set this up. Even you couldn’t convince yourself that well.

The entire front was alive the moment eclipse had fallen towards the ground, setting the atmosphere alight with so many different spirits. There were several tables aligned along the edge, a variety of foods you swore you couldn’t even name they were so exotic, the hunters having gone out extra early to collect so much; a group of Na’vi were at the front, swaying to the music they were creating and lighting everything up with their melodic voices, creating an aroma of peace and tranquillity.

Everyone you had ever come to see in your short life was present, either dancing along with the music or chatting away their day with a friend or their families. So much noise was filtering in through your ears, you could barely hear yourself think.

Things like this were never your thing, simply because of the amount of people in one area and how loud it could get - when you enjoyed listening to the soft sounds of nature on your own, you were never going to get along with an environment like this. But, like you’d told yourself, you had helped put this together, and it only felt right to watch as others enjoyed themselves in their element, basking in the feeling of the family of Metkayina coming together as one… definitely not for Neteyam…

Arms crossed over your chest like a protective mechanism, shielding yourself away from anything that made you feel even slightly uncomfortable, you stayed towards the edge, not wanting to get mixed up in the thick of the crowd, knowing that would only be your worst nightmare. Your eyes flickered from one set of people to another, searching for your best friend, only to quickly find her close to Lo’ak, the two of them sitting side by side, smiles bright and achingly adorable. Hoping to talk to Tsireya, you let this one time go, knowing she was enjoying herself with someone she really cared for, especially after the talk the two of you had no too long ago where she admitted to finding him attractive.

So, you left the two of them to it, staying in your hidden place at the back, too scared to venture any further. Allowing the sounds of wonder, awe, and bliss reach your ears and satiate a part of you inside that warms at the idea of happiness, you’re too focused somewhere else to realise there’s someone coming up behind you. “Not a party person?” they question, their voice unintentionally startling you.

Your head turns around quickly, wanting to get to the source of the scare as soon as possible, only to find the other person you’d been hoping to find - Neteyam. He hadn’t changed much for the get-together - some people like to go extra and all the way, dressing up in their most fanciest clothing just to show themselves off, but, Neteyam stuck to his roots, his usual clothes adorning his muscled skin, the same ones he ritually kept from his home in the forest.

You liked him that way.

With a calming sigh, one to rest your suddenly beating heart, you turn your attention back to the rest of the clan in front of you. “Not really,” you reply, shrugging.

“Yeah, me neither.” Neteyam laughs nonchalantly, slowly taking steps to walk up beside you. You can’t resist the small smile that begins to curve up your lips at his attempt to start a conversation with you.

Silence envelops the two of you, something that seems to happen more often than not, but you can’t find yourself dreading it. No, you’re basking in it - in everything around you. There’s such a loving atmosphere filtering in around you, from the clan, the people, from Neteyam. Just being in his presence alone seems to make you the happiest you’ve been, and you realise there’s nothing you won’t do to continue chasing that feeling.

But, whilst you soak up in the silence, the Na’vi next to you can’t seem to take it anymore. “Look,” he started, moving forwards so he’s standing directly in front of you, capturing your whole attention. Now your eyes are on him, you notice he’s looking a little nervous - his hands are fidgeting, fingers wringing and his eyes are flickering between each of your own, like they’re not sure what they should really be doing. He takes a deep breath, like he’s preparing himself, and you find yourself leeching onto that nervousness of his and taking some of it as your own. “I know that this might be a bit out-of-nowhere - or maybe it isn’t… I kind of hope it isn’t - but I… like you, like… really like you. And, I was hoping maybe we could try…” he gestures between the two of you, his words so unbelievably soft and scared, “…this?” Your eyes have widened automatically, in complete disbelief at what he’s just admitted and asked you. “But, only if you want to,” he quickly adds on, not wanting you to feel any type of pressure. “You know, I don't want to make you uncomfortable in anyway." There’s a small laugh at the end of his rambling, one that’s hesitant and hopefully understanding.

His words course and filter their way inside your mind as it begins to cloud over with so many different, lingering thoughts. You’re not quite sure what to focus on first, because you’ve never done this before, and you’ve never really prepared for it. Sure, you knew one day there would come a time where you’d have to choose a mate and go through the whole process of courting, but you’d never spoken about it in much detail with your mother. So, now that something similar was happening before your very eyes - with Neteyam, nonetheless, someone you had come to treasure hardheartedly within you - you didn’t know where to start.

The butterflies swarming in your stomach had come back, crediting to this entire situation. Thinking on it, you knew since the moment you’d first laid eyes on him, you had found Neteyam Sully attractive - how could you not? - but, not once did you ever believe he could think of you in the same way, and especially not enough to tell you that he wanted to try the two of you out together. None of this made sense - you weren’t good enough for Toruk Makto’s eldest son; you weren’t good enough for someone who was supposed to be an Olo’eyktan back in his home.

But, despite thinking these things, that didn’t mean you didn’t want him in the same way. Your negative thoughts were trying to put you down, attempting to steer you in the opposite direction and away from a beautiful opportunity presented in front of your very eyes, one that could blossom into something ethereal and unique if you didn’t give it a try. In your fight against yourself, you look down at the ground, swallowing deeply as you think over your next words. You need this time to truly understand what could happen next with whatever words come out of your mouth, you calm your racing nerves and steady your rapid heart - because, you wanted to this, too. You just had to learn to counter yourself against those pessimistic thoughts.

Looking back up at him, you smile warmly - it’s shaky and scared, but, it’s warm, nonetheless, something he picks up on. “You do not make me uncomfortable, Neteyam.”

A breathy, hesitant laugh escapes his lips, like he’d been scared of overwhelming you and somehow managing to push your further away than he ever wanted you to be. “Good, good.”

There’s more silence that surrounds you, except this time, neither one of you are feeling anything else other than one another. Your eyes pierce into each other’s, your intense gazes never straying away. You will yourself to hold this contact with him, wanting to feel even just a smidge of confidence when you admit your next words. “I would… like to try it, too.”

A small, shy smile accompanied your words, and when he saw that, along with his mind processing your wonderful words, the tension once residing in his taut shoulders dissipates, and a smile radiates upon his features, becoming wider and showing his fangs on display within his excitement. Just at the sight of his happiness from your words somehow quickens your heart from within its cage, continuing to wonder how someone as beautiful as Neteyam could hold such feelings towards you.

Almost like he knew where your mind was spiralling towards, he takes it away from you, licking his lips in concentration and taking a step that continues to scare him, despite knowing you were beginning to feel the same way. Wiping his hands together out of nerves, he brings one of them up towards you, palm facing up as he gestures for you to take it. “Would you like to dance?”

It’s only when he’s asked you that particular question that you realise the women’s singing have slowed down, a much softer, gentler tone emanating from their voices. You look in the near distance behind Neteyam, watching as couples dance sensually to the melodic sound with their partners, pressed up against one another as they show off their love to everyone else.

Neteyam notices your change in expression immediately, watching it fall as the prospect of dancing in front of others - to such an intimate-sounding song, too - has your nerves beginning to spike. Wanting to reassure you as quickly as possible, hating the sight of you so worried and distressed as it pierces his heart painfully, he moves himself directly into your line of sight again, not allowing you to look at the others anymore. Still, he hand continues to wait for you. “We don’t have to go over there,” he shook his head, wanting you to feel reassured by him alone, “we can dance here, or somewhere a little more private.”

With your heart evident in your gaze, watching him and only him, appreciation fills within your system to him. Since first meeting him, Neteyam has understood your boundaries on the same wave length as Tsireya always has, allowing you to put up walls and tending to your needs to willingly, so lovingly. This was all even before he slowly started to fall in love with you, and now that he had you, he was only going to be the perfect gentleman for you that he always has been.

A sheepish smile plasters upon your lips, and you nod up at him, your shaky hand taking his and holding on tightly, his life force aiding to calm you down. He turns his head to look at the clan, just checking up on something quickly, before gesturing the two of you in the opposite direction and leading you further into the trees.

It’s even more secluded now that you’re blanketed from the trees, darker and much more hidden away, but not an inkling of you feels scared that you’re here with only one other person, because it was Neteyam, and you know you never have to feel scared around him.

Your hand is still tight within his grasp, and you were close to letting go of him, expecting to start engaging in a dance you’re used to having watched growing up - one that was original to your clan, or maybe even his, one slightly less intimate and more fun - but, he doesn’t let you pull away. Instead, he keeps your hands clasped together, placing his other one gently against the back of your waist and slowly pulling you closer, repeatedly watching every expression you make to ensure that you’re always comfortable.

Now that he’s in position, he chuckles softly at the confusion warping your features. “This is how they dance on the star where my father is from,” he explains, watching as you slowly nod in understanding. Still, it doesn’t feel right to you, mainly because whilst Neteyam’s hands are where they should be, you still have one of your own hanging limply at your side, unsure what to do with it. Thankfully, upon noticing this, Neteyam unwraps his one from around your waist and guides yours up and around his shoulders, before returning once more to its place. “Is this okay?” he asks you softly. “Are you comfortable?

His questions that you can tell are truthful and sincere have the awkwardness you were previously feeling disappear, feeling as he gradually starts to sway the two of you side to side, the Metkayina music faintly beating in the background, quiet in an atmosphere such as this one. You find that you can no longer shy your gaze away from him. “Yes,” you reply, so soft and delicate that it has his heart fluttering, “this is perfect.”

Somehow, his smile grows wider at your words, elation coursing through your veins, feeling one of the happiest times he’s ever had the pleasure of being in. His feet continue to gentle guide the two of you in this sky-person dance, the warmth emanating from his presence alone slowly calming your once racing heart and allowing you to succumb to him entirely. Subconsciously, your head falls to lay against his chest, his rhythmic heartbeat echoing within your ears like a mantra, wishing it was all you could hear for the rest of your life.

As he lays his chin atop your head, pulling you in impossibly closer and thanking the Great Mother for allowing him to feel something so special - let alone, allowing him to take this in the palm of both his hands and call it his own now that he knew you felt for him the same - Neteyam thinks back on the moment he’d been told they were moving to a different clan for their safety, back to the moment he’d first arrived at such a startlingly different place. He remembers wishing he could go home, wanting to feel the presence of familiarity through his person again. But, he also remembers that his father had once told him that home isn’t always necessarily a place… it can be a person, too.

And, for the first time since arriving in your home, in Awa’atlu, wrapped up in your embrace, Neteyam found himself not missing the forest as much as he used to.

taglist ;

@monahiiii @bakugouswaif @teyamsatan @sulieykte @teyums @neteyamslovrr @tinkerbelle05 @netesanrr @lanasblood @camilo-uwu @queen190 @adrianarose7 @ttkttt @ayoungforeveruniverse-blog @lucialobelia @littlepisceanpixie @gyuventure @afro-hispwriter @thexplosivegirl @bellstwd @tahni-04 @eclipseatsea @6422btw @badbussylol @ellabellabus07

[keeksandgigz]

Hii!

I was in class when i thought about this so bare with me

I’d love to see eddie x introvert!reader, since eddie is quite extroverted i’d love to see how they act in school and at lunch, does he sit next to her when they get to choose seats or does he sit with his friends? Does she get sad over “dumb” stuff? Maybe he overshares kinda personal stuff about her and she gets really hurt?

I will love you 4ever if you write something with this hehehehehe

thank you! xx

hi darling!!

this is gonna be very based on myself as i am introverted to a fault oops

I do think that he's very respectful of your boundaries and he really tries to kind of stave off putting you on the spot. Like when you two get together he spends two months literally hanging out with you at lunch because you don't feel ready to meet his friends.

It's not to the point where he ditches his friends to hang with you- albeit some complaints, but they're children, what do they know?- But it definitely gives you your time, especially because it can be debilitating sometimes. Meeting that many people at once? And he gets it, of course he does.

You're only yourself when you're with him, and of course, that means that he's your only friend most of the time. You both know a lot about each other, but I do think he has a big mouth and sometimes stuff just escapes him, especially when he's taken by the enthusiasm of being at the center of the conversation.

It takes him three months to get you to join him and his friends at lunch, and the first time you do, he's so excited he's like "My lady's here, so you guys better behave yourselves. She thinks you guys are a bunch of brutes already" and it kinda hurts you because now they have this opinion of you that you don't like them and they don't see why they should like you back.

And you have to block out the tears 'cause now everyone's looking at you weird- or so you think- and all you need is to hide back in the library. Needless to say it takes him a whole afternoon to get you to forgive him. He apologizes telling you that he's an idiot and that he'll take you out to the mall to spend however much money he's made that week from dealing.

You also make him tell the guys he was exaggerating and that you didn't think they were animals. Well, you do, but they don't have to know that.

[billgetsmewet]

Can you do an imagine where it’s mutual masterbation with early 2008 bill (the black hair with white streaks one) and she squirts all over herself as she watches bill jerk himself off infront of her. Bit of a wild one, came from the depths of my imagination (if you’re not comfortable that’s 100% okay) 😘😘

Paired

all the expected warnings are in the req!

a/n:i need a coke zero so bad

You and your friend were talking in school and she mentioned something about “mutual masturbating” while talking about her new hookup.

You werent suprised , she was an oversharer, but this word caught your attention.

You werent sure how comfortable your boyfriend , Bill, was about these things, since you guys never had sex together before.

You and Bill finally got the chance to hang out, its been a while and youve forgotten about this whole “mutual masturbation” thing.

-nsfw-

He came over to your house, but you guys got pretty bored after a few hours.

You were laying on him, head in the crook of his neck. You felt something almost pierce you on your pussy.. he was barely even touching you..

Bill slowly rolled you off him, thinking you were asleep. You could barely hear his zipper move down before he unbuttoned his pants.

You could hear him whine and moan, whpering your name as his dick was all wet from precum, you couldnt help but crack your eyes open for a bit, just to see his length.

God, was he big.

You wanted to wake up so bad, jerk him off instead of him doing it or just do something instead.. you wanted him to please you so bad aswell.

You sit up, frightening him for a bit.

No-no no, Bill, its okay, its okay! dont worry!! im so sorry

you were obviously not sorry, you did this on purpose.

you gave him a tight hug, feeling his dick, that was hanging out of his jeans at this point, harden.

Fuck it.. you mumble, taking off your shirt, beginning to do the same as him, you couldnt help it.

You finger yourself while he is jerking himself off, hes so hot, his cum all over his fingers, as his mouth hangs open.

He moans your name, making you speed up with your fingers, close to the edge.

Y/n.. he moans submissively, begging for your help

He obviously gets no reply as youre too busy playing with your pussy, but its not like he gives a shit.

He starts to moan heavily and take deep breaths, hes clearly close to his climax.

You take one good look back at him and she shoots his load, cumming all over his hand and your bed.

He gets up immediately, apologizing, but you just kiss him in reply, starting to make out.

ps i hope this was ok😭😭 love u izzy 😜😜😜

[somanyratsinthewalls]

Burning Hearts Chapter 16

Pairing: Law x Straw Hat Zoan Type (named) OC 

Summary: *SLOW BURNNNNNN* You were teleported across the globe in an instant, away from your crew. Your body was badly broken and beaten, thrust into the harsh landscape of a Northern island. You are discovered by the Heart Pirates and brought back to health. Startled upon waking up in a foreign place with an unfamiliar crew, you are shocked with the news that you’ll be spending two years there. Trafalgar Law, the captain of the Heart Pirates has made a promise to train you, but will it become something more than a mentor relationship?

Taglist: @zoros-fourth-sword @cottoncandyloverrrr @nothing-but-brass @airwolf92

WC: 2400

Burning Hearts Chapter 16: Broken Trust

— — 

The next morning, you were awoken gently by a sliver of light making its way past the dated lace curtains and the faintest chirping of songbirds outside the window. You flex and stretch a bit and feel the warm body behind you holding you close. You touch your lower stomach, nothing but smooth skin. Last night really did happen… all of it…

You turn around and nuzzle your face into the sparse chest hair that decorated Law’s tattooed sternum. Law hums, he must have already been awake for awhile. 

“Good morning.” He says as he cards his hand through your hair. 

“Good morning back.” You whisper as you pepper his bare chest with light kisses. 

“T-that tickles…” His hand in your hair stills. You pull back to look at his face. 

“Law… I really can’t thank you enough for last night… You have no idea what it means to me.” You smile and lean in and place a kiss on lips. 

“You don’t have to thank me. I promised I would help you.” He states. You smile at him. 

You lean forward and press more kisses to the column of Law’s throat, applying more pressure than before. His breathing hitches and his body freezes. 

“Well…” You say in between your wet mouthing of his neck. “If you won’t let me say thank you, maybe there’s another way…” You slide your hand down his chest to cup his half hard bulge through his sweatpants. 

Law grabs your wrist. 

“No, it’s fine!” He says nervously as he pulls away from you and sits up in bed. 

“Law, I-“ You didn’t know wether to apologize or reassure him that you wanted to pleasure him, but he cut you off before you got the chance. 

“We should get back soon. I’m going to clean up and we can leave.” Law gets up from the bed and leaves you laying there, naked and alone, as he enters the en suite bathroom. You were confused and frankly a bit frustrated… but that wasn’t new to you about your feelings for Law. You sigh and hop out of bed to pack up your things. 

— — 

The trip back to the base was mostly silent, both of you clearly feeling awkward about the situation in bed this morning but nobody daring to broach the subject verbally. Once arriving back you quickly head to your room to drop of your things before heading straight next door to Ikkaku’s room. 

You knock on the door. 

“You bumping uglies in here or can I come in?” You holler from the hallway. 

“Come in!” You hear your friend call from inside. You push the door open and you see Ikkaku and Penguin sitting on the floor playing cards. 

“Beat it, Peng. I need to vent.” You make a motion with your thumb to the doorway. 

“Oh shit. This doesn’t sound good.” Ikkaku’s smile drops as she sees your face. 

“Aww come on I won’t tell anyone! Let me stay!” Penguin whines. 

“No way, you even tell Shachi if you haven’t taken a dump all day, there’s no way you won’t spill these beans. You’re the king of oversharing.” You scowl and cross your arms. 

“Fine.” Penguin sighs and rises to his feet and leaves the room, closing the door behind him. 

“Soo…. Your romantic getaway not fairy tale quality?” Ikkaku inquires, patting the spot next to her on the floor for you to sit. 

“Ugh that’s the thing! It really was! Until this morning…” You groan. 

“Okay okay, back it up. Did you guys like… do it?” She raises an eyebrow. 

“No!” You reply immediately, sounding almost irritated. “I mean we… more like he… well he gave me head and it was great but-“

“It was great? NO way. That makes sense because he asked Peng about it in the kitchen the other day and he was super weird about it… but I didn’t think much of it because he’s weird about like… everything? You know?”

“Wait he asked him how to eat pussy?” You say, wide eyed in shock. 

“Apparently. I’m just shocked it was good. The first time Penguin went down on me it was like a dog trying to get the last bit out of a peanut butter jar…” 

“Ew.” You furrow your brow in disgust at the mental image. “Ok but this morning I tried to reciprocate and he totally pushed me off. Freaked out about it. Now it’s weird between us. I don’t know what I did wrong.” You sigh and sit back on the palms of your hands. 

“Maybe he needs more time. He’s a delicate guy, D. He barely allows himself any time to enjoy himself or anything at all, he probably isn’t used to the idea of someone wanting to make him feel good.” Ikkaku leans forward and grabs a bag of cheese puffs from somewhere under her bed. She cracks the bag open and offers it to you. You grab a few and shove them into your mouth. 

“I mean it’s like? What man in his 20’s doesn’t want a handjob?” You complain through mouths of processed junk food. 

“Apparently the kind of man that you’re into.” Ikkaku shrugs. “Ease him into it. Talk to him about it. He might be weird, but he probably just needs to trust you and he takes a long time to trust people. He’s been hurt a lot and you gotta just let him feel it out at his own pace.”

“Fine, I get that… but you have to admit it’s kind of giving mixed signals when he was face first inside of me just the night before!” 

“Damn he was really going for it, huh? Well, maybe giving and receiving are on different planes for him! It wouldn’t kill you to have a conversation about it.” Ikkaku scolds you. 

“I’m gonna give it a day. I think my brain needs a break from all this. Do you wanna smoke about it or something?” You say as you fish your metal case full of pre-rolled joints out of your pocket along with your lighter. 

“Normally I would reprimand you about unhealthy coping mechanisms, but since you’re offering…” 

— — 

Alarms blared all through the base early the next morning. Law was of course already up and dressed, going over paperwork at his desk when they first went off. He immediately sprung up, grabbed his blade and headed out to see what the cause of the alarms. 

“Captain!” Bepo shouted as he rounded the hallway corner. “Pirates! There’s a whole crew of pirates docking on the East shore of the island!” “Shit.” Law says as various Heart Pirates joined him and Bepo in the hallway. “I’ll go take care of it. You all stay here.” 

“I’m coming too.” Daisy chimed in from behind Law. 

“No you’re not.” Law state and put out his hand to stop her. 

Blades in hand, she brushed past him towards the large metal door of the base. 

“I wasn’t asking for permission.” 

— — 

Law quickly teleported himself through the forest towards the eastern shore as Daisy soared between the tree tops, careful to stay below the sky where she could be easily seen. Upon arriving at the beach, the pair found a surly crew of 50 or 60 pirates that had already disembarked their two ships. 

A very large pirate with a scar across his face wearing a yellow hat stepped forwards, clearly the crew’s captain. 

“You know this guy?” Daisy asked Law, her eyes not leaving the foreign pirate. 

“Never seen him before in my life.” Law responds. 

The captain speaks. 

“So the rumors are true! Strawhat Pirate Rito Daisy, 60 million berries, hiding out with a warlord! Were you going to keep the money for yourself, Trafalgar? Or did you have something else in mind?” The pirate chuckled evilly. 

“Who even are you?” Daisy ask, annoyed. 

“I am the great feared captain-“

“You know what? I actually don’t care. You can all leave now alive or you can board your ship in body bags. Take your pick, dick head.” Daisy retorts. 

“I’m not leaving without my 60 million berries, bitch.” The stranger spits back. 

“Wrong choice.” Daisy unsheathes her blades and looks towards Law. “I guess we have to kill these guys, huh.” 

“Guess so.” Law brandishes his own weapon. “Room.” 

And with a single “room” the fight was on. Normally, two against fifty were unfair odds, but a mediocre pirate crew against two wildly powerful devil fruit users evened the playing field. 

Law battled fiercely, taking out handfuls of enemy pirates at once, trying to reach the captain. He assumed Daisy was doing the same, he wasn’t worried, knowing that this was a perfect opportunity for her to use the skills he had been teaching her. It was time to sink or swim. 

Law briefly looked over in her direction and was impressed with what he saw. Pirates were falling all around Daisy, skin burnt to a crisp, massive chunks taken out of their flesh by what seemed to be massive claws. He had only seen Daisy like this once before, but this time she was even more dragon than human, she was twice her size and her entire back half resembled that of a dangerous creature. Black scales glimmered in the sun from her back haunches to high up on her torso, a huge spiked tail swinging and knocking men to the backs. 

Daisy reached the captain before Law did, dispatching him quickly with a fierce blow with her back claws to the chest. 

Upon seeing their captain felled, the rest of the pirates stopped fighting. There were only a few dozen left, but they all dropped their weapons. 

“W-we’ll leave! Please! We won’t tell anyone what happened! Please!” A bruised and bleeding man on his knees begged Law to spare their pathetic lives. 

“Fine. Go. Don’t ever come back here-“ Law is interrupted by a massive snarl and a burst of flames engulfing the entirety of the rest of the enemy pirates, effectively barbecuing all of them. 

“Daisy! Enough!” Law shouts at the large creature he knew just the night before as his lover and bedmate. 

Daisy turns to Law after hearing his voice and steps towards him, nostrils flaring in quite a reptilian way. She continues advancing towards him, tail swishing angrily and smoke billowing from her nose and mouth. A guttural, clicking type growl comes from deep in her throat. 

“Daisy…” Law warns as he slowly steps back. 

Before Law could draw his blade in defense, Daisy let out a powerful roar and lunged forward. Her claws dug straight into his left arm and ripped his flesh. 

“AH!” Law cries out and instinctively uses his full strength to lift the beast off of him and throw it to the ground. As the body tumbles away from him on the sand, the tail and claws vanish and the Daisy that Law knows returned to view. She was whimpering and writhing in pain, he hit her harder than he had meant to, but he had to protect himself. 

He looked at his arm, it was bleeding profusely. Law made a quick room to suture the wound closed, but it wouldn’t hold for long. This was going to take much longer to repair, but he didn’t have time, he needed to see if Daisy was okay. 

Law runs over to the curled up body. He grabs her shoulder and rolls her onto her back, eyes fluttering open, pupils now returned from their snakelike slits to the human ones he was so fond of catching glimpses of. 

“Daisy? Where are you hurt?” Law does a once over but can’t find anything of note. 

“Hurts…” Daisy manages to choke out before she coughs of an alarming amount of blood onto Law’s jacket. 

— — 

You wake up in the surgical room on the table, reminiscent of your first morning at the Heart Pirate base. This time however, you were not shackled to the operating table and you were certainly thankful for that. 

You were however, confused. You had an ache in your abdomen and no recollection of how the fight ended. 

“You’re up. How do you feel?” 

Your head snaps in the direction of the familiar voice. 

Law was seated on the office stool finishing up some sort of bandage on his left bicep. He looked tired. 

“What happened? You’re hurt?” You sit up in concern, ignoring the sharp pain in your stomach. 

“I’m fine. You had some internal bleeding but I fixed everything. You should be back to normal soon.” Law doesn’t look up from his work on his bandage. 

“They did that to you?” You inquire. 

There was a long silence, the only thing being heard was the buzzing of the fluorescent lights. 

“Law?” You press further. 

“It wasn’t them.” He stated plainly while refusing to face you. 

It was silent again. 

“What does that mean? Law? I don’t know what that means, did something happen?” The tone in your voice became frantic. 

“You lost control Daisy. I’ll be fine. We just need to train more.” Law finally rises from the stool and walks towards your sitting form on the operating table. 

“I… I hurt you…?” Your eyes fall to his bandaged arm. Your hands go to cover your open mouth. “I’m so sorry, Law…” You put one of your hands on his forearm as tears welled in your eyes. “I would never try to hurt you, you know that, right?”

“I know.” Law’s voice was still cold. 

You sit up further and try to lean into Law’s chest. 

“Law, please, I am so sorry.” You start to cry. “I’m so sorry…” 

Law puts his hand on your cheek and forces you to look up at him. He uses his thumb to wipe the tears rolling down your soft skin. 

“Enough. Use it to make you stronger. Get some rest for now. You can stay with me.” Law picks you up, as gently as he could with his injury, and carries you to his room. 

--

*Author's Note: Hi! So so sorry for the long break, I was on vacation then I got the stomach flu lol. Next chapter should be up this week, too! Thank you for being patient! Feedback is always appreciated!*

[tonberry-yoda]

What about fluff ABC with Gyro? I thought sending about a word first for this, but I realized that he deserves the whole ABC 😩👌

Gyro Fluff Alphabet

notes - fluff alphabet here. YESSS! We love gyro and he does deserve the whole ass alphabet! thanks so much for the request and apologies for taking so long!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

horse riding

deep convos

and lots of shopping

i just see it

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Everything?????

like he is just in AWE by you

but also your laugh

he can really get you laughing and he just loves that so so so so much

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

he would rub your back and whisper sweet nothings in your ear

if you just need some space, he will give you the space

strangely, i think he would be a good cook and he would make you something to cheer you up

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

he could see the two of you together forever

getting a home, stuff like that for SURE

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

he acts dominant and he actually kind of is

but it's more equal tbh

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

sometimes he just picks fights to be stinky

but those never last long

real fights never usually happen, but when they do he is SO PETTY and will not forgive you until you forgive him first LMFAO

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

VERY GRATEFUL

i mean he sees everything you do and all the hardwork and loves you so much for it

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

he keeps his past a secret

he doesnt want it getting in the way of a potential future

but he doesnt hide much

hes a goofy overshareer for sure lol

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

he didnt change much

he felt like he didnt need to change for someone and that makes him very comfortable

he hopes that you didnt have that feeling that you needed to change because he thinks you're perfect

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

oh yeah

he'll just steal you away from who you're talking to and be all cutesy to make them jealous LOL

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

OH GOD YES

slow, passionate kisses that leave green lipstick marks

he'll whisper sweet things against your lips and pull you close

the first kiss was SO romantic under the sunset and GOD you can't stop thinking about it

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

he would just tell you

but it would be so romantic actually

he would tell you how much he loves you

gives you the "you dont have to feel the same, but I love you more than anything"

you both cry

and have been together since

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

I think so, yeah!

when you have the conversation, he would prep you for the proposal

it would be a while longer to see if it's something you two really want to do

he proposes again under the sunset and the wedding is simple, just close friends and those you love

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

pumpkin

sweetheart

pookie (it gets on your nerves for sure)

love

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

he stares at you with a small smile always

heart eyes for sure

it actually wouldnt be that obvious to others, but he makes sure when youre alone to remind you how much he loves you

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

i think so!

he doesnt hide the relationship

he'll hold your hand or give you little kisses, but nothing crazy or anything that makes you or others uncomfortable

he loves bragging about you though tee hee

saying how much he loves you ALL THE TIME

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that's beneficial in a relationship.

a small weird one, but if you have long hair, he loves to braid it! and if you have black hair, he will learn how to do your hair in ways you love!

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

STUPIDLY ROMANTIC

and like cliche but without realizing it

KISSES IN THE SUNSET DUDE

it feels like a dream tbh

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

oh definitely!

you both have separate dreams and he respects his own and your

he will help you if he needs to, but he wants to see you do this on your own and feel successful without him

and he does that for his own dreams too

but you both help each other if needed

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

he likes crazy fun stuff, but he doesnt need it

he loves asking you on CRAZY dates and if you say yes, it's fun

but again, he likes your chill life and likes having it for sure

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

he knows you STUPID well

like he literally can tell if your upset, sad, angry, happy, etc.

he knows you like the back of his hand and sometimes better than you do

when he sees something's wrong, he will 100% be able to help

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

you mean a lot to him

but he isnt codependent on you

he doesnt need you to feel like a valid person

he just knows that you are a part of him and he loves that sm

but seriously, you are a number one thing in his life for sure

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

his love language is words of affirmation, so before bed, he will always whisper how much he loves you until you both fall asleep

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

YESSSSSS

he loves loves LOVES cuddles

just how soft you are, he cant get over you

Y earning - How will they cope when they're missing their partner?

he just kinda chills

but he'll run into a room, thinking you're there, and then get sad that you're not

you're so used to being together that it's weird when the two of you are apart

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

he definitely would

people he loves mean the world to him, so he would do literally anything for you

~~~~~

jjba masterlist (2) (3) | pinned post | ko-fi

2023 @tonberry-yoda – do not repost or claim ANY of my work as your own! likes, reblogs, and comments are not only welcome, but appreciated <3

~~~~~

[ihhfhonao3]

I have been re-reading your Apollo epilepsy fic over and over so many times, I was wondering if you could write another one where Apollo has a minor seizure at work, but Trucy freaks out and calls klavier?

Hello again, and thanks so much for requesting! I mentioned it in another req but I do apologize for this one taking so long, all my motivation went out the window like mid-may so now is the time that I'm finally able to clean our and answer some stuff people have asked for.

That said, I hope you enjoy, per usual it's under the cut!

Apollo had been having a rough and stressful week at the agency, and Trucy could definitely tell. Apollo wasn’t always too hard to read when it came to his emotions- even though he tried his hardest not to complain (or at least, tried his hardest not to complain to Trucy. Complaining to his boyfriend Klavier was a whole other story), his consistent audible sighs and random, out-of-the-blue groans made things a little more obvious to discern. Trucy didn’t really blame Apollo for bitching, however- while his current case wasn’t too difficult or confusing (as Apollo had claimed), the witnesses and defendant were incredibly annoying and difficult to work with. From what Trucy saw, one of the key witnesses was an extremely rude man who talked down to Apollo during his investigations. On top of that, the defendant was a little bit of a blabbermouth. Trucy was sure that Apollo was afraid that she would overshare in court and ruin his case for her.

All of this combined only made all the more sense when Apollo leaned back in his chair and rubbed his eyes, mumbling to himself under his breath. Trucy was doing her homework on the couch at the moment and she chuckled a little when she looked over at him. This wasn’t a particularly unnatural reaction for Apollo, in all honesty. Whilst he did undoubtedly love his job, that didn’t mean that there weren’t points where he probably considered going on an extended leave of absence. And from the stories that her dad had told her about his younger years as a rookie attorney, Trucy knew that Apollo wasn’t the only one who had thought about throwing in the towel before. She was even beginning to observe this phenomenon with Athena as well, and she was still just a trainee.

Trucy got back to her homework just as Apollo leaned back forward to continue what he was previously doing. Apollo let out a long and sad sigh as he resumed staring at his computer. At the moment, Apollo and Trucy were the only two people in the agency. Athena had headed out early for the night and Phoenix had already retired to the second floor of the agency (where his and Trucy’s apartment resided) so he could go to sleep, telling Apollo to ensure that he did not let his daughter stay up too late into the night. Apollo agreed, albeit grudgingly.

Trucy squinted as she tried to analyze a particularly convoluted math word problem. Goodness gracious, who in the world needs this many watermelons? She thought as she re-read it. Trucy set her work down in a huff. Time for a break. The seventh break of the night, but really, who was counting?

Trucy leaned forwards on the couch and let her eyes wander for a moment. She looked at Charley sitting in the corner, she looked at the peculiar stain on the coffee table, she looked at her various props in the back, she looked at Apollo who was continuing to mutter to himself. Apollo didn’t notice that Trucy was not working, since he was so absorbed in his work. He was hunched over at his desk, staring angrily at the case papers as he scribbled something much too quickly on a notepad. He seemed completely and totally consumed by what he was doing, thinking about nothing other than the task he had at hand. Trucy couldn’t tell if this was due to pure determination or pure stress.

Apollo groaned again. Well, stress was the answer then.

“Alright there, Polly?” Trucy asked. “Do you want me to get you anything? Coffee, maybe?”

“‘M fine,” Apollo muttered. “Do your homework. Don't get distracted.”

Trucy shrugged and looked back at her assignment. No matter how hard she tried, though, she just couldn’t bring herself to focus on it. At one point, she did notice that she was making a little bit of a dent in her work, but almost immediately afterwards she got distracted again. Not by a truck passing by or a dog barking, but this time she was actually distracted by Apollo.

He kept groaning and mumbling repeatedly in obnoxiously loud volumes, until at one point, he sat almost completely still and started to stare into space. For some reason, this scared Trucy- Apollo wasn’t typically one to zone out, especially when he was working so hard. Something must be wrong.

“Are you alright there Polly?” Trucy asked. There was no response.

“Polly? Hey, Polly!” Trucy tried to get Apollo’s attention, but he was still completely unresponsive.

Trucy then noticed something. Apollo’s arm was shaking slightly at his side.

Trucy began to panic. She couldn’t believe how she could have forgotten.

Trucy had forgotten that Apollo had epilepsy.

Quickly, she got up from her spot on the couch and grabbed Apollo’s phone from his desk. She opened the emergency call keypad and punched in the number that she had memorized by heart the minute she started listening to Guilty Love.

“Hase, my dear, what did I tell you about staying up so late all of the time?” Klavier Gavin’s voice came from the phone, smooth and gentle. “You need to work on having-”

“Klavier!” Trucy shouted. “Something’s wrong with Polly! I think he’s having a seizure!”

Trucy heard Klavier let out a small gasp from the other end.

“Fräulein, how long has it been since it started?” Klavier asked.

“About a minute or so I think,” Trucy said.

“Got it. I’m setting up a timer for him right now,” Klavier said. “Now, I am going to give you a couple of instructions. Please do exactly as I say.”

Trucy nodded. “Go ahead.”

“Okay,” Klavier said. “Now, I want you to stand in front of him for the duration of the seizure. This is to make sure that he doesn’t fall. Keep a hand in front of his chest just in case. You with me?”

“Completely,” Trucy said. She put a hand in front of Apollo, a couple inches away from his chest.

“Gut.” Klavier said. “Now, don’t touch him or move his body, but if you need to, inch his chair away from his desk so he doesn’t knock into it while having muscle spasms. When he’s in a clear, safe spot, lock the wheels on his chair.”

Trucy put the phone on speaker as Klavier gave further instructions, doing as he told her and gently rolling Apollo away from his desk.

It may not have seemed like it, but Trucy was deeply afraid and nervous. What if she messed something up? What if Apollo got hurt and it was all her fault because she couldn’t follow simple directions? What if-

“It’s been nearly four minutes,” Klavier said suddenly. “You may want to prepare to call an ambulance.” He sounded ever so slightly distraught.

Trucy started to breathe deep to calm herself down, but just as it seemed that the paramedics would have to be summoned to the agency in the middle of the night, Apollo’s arm started to slow down its shaking and he didn’t look so spacey anymore.

“Klavier, I think it’s over!” Trucy said happily.  “He’s coming back, his arm isn’t shaking anymore!”

“Oh thank goodness,” Klavier said, sighing. “That was a longer one. I’m just glad that it didn’t cross the medical threshold.”

“Truce?” Apollo mumbled, clearly disoriented. “What happened?”

“You had a seizure,” Trucy said. “Klavier helped me keep you safe.”

Apollo smiled a little weakly. He was clearly still tired. 

“I’m proud of you for doing that, Truce. And thank goodness you picked up, right Klav?” Apollo said.

“You know I always do when it’s you who’s calling,” Klavier said. Trucy could practically hear his grin.

“Okay, alright, enough,” Apollo said. He started to slowly get up from his chair, and Trucy helped anchor him as he stood up to prevent him from toppling over. Apollo then grabbed his phone and turned it off speaker mode.

“I love you,” Apollo said into the phone’s microphone. Trucy could hear a happy shout from Klavier before Apollo hung up on him.

“Polly, you can’t overwork yourself like this,” Trucy said. “You’re stressing too hard and it’s clearly causing you some problems.”

Apollo chuckled and slowly made an exaggerated bow. “Aye aye, captain. I shall make my leave now and treat myself to a good night’s rest, per your order m’lady.”

“You better!” laughed Trucy. “But I’m serious. Don’t work yourself to the bone. Daddy knows about your condition and I think he’d rather have an unfinished case than you in the emergency room.

“Alright, alright,” Apollo said. “I’ll try and do better to not do things that can hurt me, like being a workaholic and not eating. Since I know it matters to you.”

“Who does it not matter to, Polly?” Trucy asked. “That’s a weird thing to say!”

“But really, I mean it when I say thank you,” Apollo said, straightening up. “So much can go wrong when people with epilepsy aren’t properly taken care of during a seizure. So good job for thinking on your feet and reacting accordingly. You probably… you probably just saved my life there.”

Trucy blushed and grinned broadly. “Don’t flatter me, Polly! You just go home already!”

Apollo saluted and bid good night as he exited the agency.

And he did end up following orders, going to bed as soon as he got back home.

[the-haunted-office]

Hey guys.

I wanted to take a moment to be a little candid with you. Just a small bit of transparency to kind of clear the air a little bit, and I think it will also help clear my head too.

I don't want to go into too much detail and overshare or anything, but I am willing to share a little bit.

As some of you may know, I am a mother. I have a young child who is special needs, and all this last summer we've been struggling with him behavior-wise. About a month ago he was placed into a psychiatric facility, and I'm afraid I have... not been at my best myself mentally and emotionally lately.

If I have been acting out of sorts or spoken out of turn or anything, I sincerely apologize for it. I have not meant to cause anyone any undue stress as a result of my own stress. If I have, please know that I regret it deeply and I am sorry for it.

Knowing this, I am doing my best to keep myself in check and to step away whenever I feel like my anxiety is getting to be too much. Sometimes some things unexpectedly upset me and I need to be better about walking away. I will be better about this.

If you'd like to come into my DMs, I'd be happy to chat, with the understanding that I don't particularly feel up to going into detail about my private life. If you'd like to discuss other things, my box is open, so feel free to come on in.

Thank you for your patience and understanding, and as always, thank you for being here with me.