#ao3 (potential) fic
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one-chaotic-neautral · 8 days ago
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Arcane ships ranked, for fun
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The main ships and some rarepairs I've found, I like pretty much everything in the first 4 rows. I probably missed some but idk what they are and I'm too lazy to add more rn.
feel free to add your thoughts or ships but again its just for funsies :)
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fumifooms · 10 months ago
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Hien & Benichidori compilation
Okay so I put a & but this absolutely a shippy post, the hienichidori community is quiet af and there is no discourse but their comics in their Adventurer’s Bible profiles…!!! Many may ask, does Benichidori canonically have a crush on Hien?! Straightforward answer: It’s left heavily implied but yes. Alternate answer: If the framing of Falin in an explosion as Toshiro says that he loves her isn’t meant to associate the explosion with falling in love when it is mirrored in the next page, then… I think it’s a mix of both, I don’t think just this is true because Hien wouldn’t know who Shuro is talking about or even what Falin looks like, but it could be that the explosion is instead meant to show a world vision being shaken, the thing blowing you away. So for Hien, having Shuro say that breaks this unsaid assumption she’s always had that they might end up together, and thus Falin is taken like an explosion to the face. Similarly, for someone with facial dysmorphia and for who appearances and being subservient are everything, having Hien be confident and totally assume her plain looks, even uplifting herself, that also shakes her world like a bomb. And yes it’s not just about the makeup!! Benichidori’s drawn to her confidence, to her unapologetic attitude, to her attitude. Benichidori unexpectedly snapped at Hien too, but she was totally unshaken and she replied casually and lightheartedly even then; Benichidori saying she can be herself with Hien is about Hien not caring about her mask, both her makeup and her subdued demeanor. Hien is canonically special to Benichidori.
And on the note of that comic, I took a picture from my Adventurer’s Bible for this but I think the fantranslations I’ve seen are lovely too, really gets across all the meaning of the original sentence… Where Benichidori said "She was the only one I could be my unadorned self in front of" (which is my fave) or "I’m able to act my honest self with her". Benichidori having body(more specifically facial) dysmorphia is explicitly stated in the Adventurer’s Bible btw.
Pleasee how Hien’s extra is her talking about her life story and Toshiro to Benichidori… How Hien says "That guy is blind!" and Benichidori says "I’ve noticed that 😊" as if saying that Toshiro is blind to what a catch Hien is… Also in the ninja girls’ shared inn room Benichidori puts her futon next to Hien’s bed.
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spokelseskladden · 1 year ago
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hey guys i imprinted on another minor character and now im making it everyone's problem :)
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rystiel · 2 months ago
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why are college era fiddauthor fics in such short supply
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that-willowtree · 18 days ago
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What if instead of Jayce being forced through literal hell, he got the Ekko treatment and instead went to an AU where he and viktor were happy together? And he had to force himself to find the strength to return back to his original dimension. I’d really like to see like a jayvik fic of this
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uh-oh-its-bird · 9 months ago
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"Kid Kakashi somehow spawns in jujutsu kaisen and looks concerningly similar to gojo" trope only instead of Satoru finding him first, Suguru does
Kakashi gets a dad and Suguru gets the world's most horrifically loyal child soldier, everyone wins (except for the people who really, really dont)
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phoenixcatch7 · 5 months ago
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Loz fandom stop being angsty and give the daydreaming kids on big fun adventures with a cool glowing sword some actual whimsy and joy challenge
#It's like the happy media equals angsty fandom and vice versa but like. Video game series about the dreams and adventures of childhood with#A fandom full of angst and abandonment and depression and smut#It's why I don't really stay in the loz fandom long each time I circle back around#There's so much potential for good things and comfort and snuggly warmth and lightheartedness.#Like yeah messed up things happen in front of and to link but kids are resilient beasts and most importantly they fix it#He's literally wearing the Peter pan hat to invoke that sort of eternal wonder that's the DESIGN of the hat that's why it's so identifiable#Fanart captures it a lot. The gorgeous landscapes and quiet moments and dappled sunlight#But fics???? Oh lu fics are just full of miscommunication and resentment and sour interactions and pain and simmering anger#I prefer to read trusted authors because it's so wearing but the problem is you have to go out and find them lol#It's a very controversial belief of mine that every link enjoyed their adventure even if it was scary or sad and would not be averse to#Another. Oh the circumstances they might hate. But link has never been one to refuse the call#That's the POINT they stepped up when the adults couldn't it's their COURAGE that they'd be fastest to volunteer.#Unrelated but post game botk is adhd central you can do literally whatever you want and whatever pace and you just drift around getting#Distracted and teleporting all over and setting challenges and poking around every nook and cranny#Like botw I had over 300 koroks and 98% map completion. I maxed out hero's path twice over. Totk I've just been wandering around#Speed farming lynels like 17 different goals drifting from one to the other as I wish. Still missing the last 2 sage orbs NO idea where#There's like a million hinoxs now tf#loz#legend of zelda#lu#linked universe#ao3
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paperxcrowns · 6 months ago
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i am genuinely tweaking over the fact that macgyver (2016) practically glosses over the fact that Mac was straight up!!! Lying!!!! to bozer for YEARS.
this would have been such good material to use to explore Mac and Bozer's relationship, and how complex the situation was bc YES it feels like a betrayal but it's also Mac simply protecting Bozer from his dangerous life and still keeping him close despite the danger, despite the very real possibility of bozer accidentally finding out or simply using bozer to get to Mac.
NOT TO MENTION. Boze was Mac's only link to something not remotely related to his job!!! the only bit of normal in his chaotic life!!!!
both of them having to find their footing again after the reveal bc nothing can go back to normal. like. bozer thinking back to all the weird injuries mac returned home with from his think tank business trips, all the lies, all the secrecy, all the time. justified hurt on bozer's side as well as understanding bc if the roles were reversed wouldn't bozer also lie to keep his closest friend safe? understanding the reason doesn't make the years of lies hurt any less.
adhjfkglgl i have. so many thoughts about this. i am clawing at the walls.
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its-alittleobsessed · 8 months ago
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Someone HELP the devil’s whispering in my ear and telling me to write a Stanford DeanCas fic.
It took six months for Dad to skip out on Dean after Sam left. Six months. Which is more time than Dean’s ever stayed in one place after Mom died, but less than the amount of time it took Cas to walk into Dean’s life afterwards. So it’s fine, really.
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welcometoteyvat · 3 months ago
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i think it's a shame that xingqiu and gaming (ship or friends) never got popular because everyone needs to insert chongyun in them; I like chongming as well and I like chongyun but I suspect the only reason mingqiu isn't popular is bc people dont like taking apart xingyun :| their mutual voicelines are incredibly funny, gaming and how he went out on a limb for lion dance is what xingqiu maybe wishes he could do with guhua martial arts, add in the fact that gaming has never been able to finish a book without falling asleep,,, i'd be really interested to see them interact together where the focus is their relationship, not the love triangle jealousy trope that most of the popular depictions of them are focused on :\
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rainboneish · 11 months ago
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i’m a firm believer in Luffy not having qualms about killing his enemies but there is just something so delicious about the idea of Robin and Zoro being his demons…
Zoro, who used to kill for a living, brutally if his reputation of Demon of the east blue is to be believed, who has been lonely since kuina’s death, being his captain’s guard dog and best friend, willing to go into hell for him and bring a bit of hell into the world in turn… i love bloodthirsty Zoro, who uses his blades on their enemies and offers himself as Luffy’s sword as well
Robin, called the Devil Child since she was eight years old, through no fault of her own, having had to acquire the skill set to go with that name just to survive to adulthood, unable to trust or feel safe till she is fully accepted by the straw hats led by Luffy, finally able to let her soft side flourish but never above using everything she learned Before for the boy/man who gave her Everything
And luffy, the “son of the devil” as zoro jokingly called him at the Beginning, as many people would call him based on who his father is, carrying the will of D, the will of a wild liberator God from the hidden past, who burns as bright as the sun
there is just something about a bond between the Captain, his right sword arm and his spy master, who view him as both a younger sibling and a leader/savior they would do anything for, who both understand him without talking
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gd-dollopole · 2 months ago
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I cannot stop thinking about the comparison between BBC Merlin and Smallville.
As the directors of BBC Merlin have said, an inspiration has been taken from the ten long seasons of Smallville, an US TV show I always loved, and literally grew up with, and since a few months back, I also made a re-watch of Smallville, I can’t stop thinking about the potential BBC Merlin could have had, if it actually followed some bits of the storyline of Smallville.
We can already see some of the similarities between the shows:
Merlin wears a red neckerchief with a blue tunic and viceversa, like Clark Kent, and whenever he’s hopeless or sad or angry, he wears worn out grey colours, and as an avid fan of Smallville, I can assure you that Clark Kent wears the same things;
Clark Kent has to hide his powers in a world that would hurt him, kill him, or experiment on him, if he let on his deepest secret, and for that, he not only loses the people he cares about the most, much like Merlin does, which are his father, his friends, his lovers, and almost even his mother, but forbids himself to fall in love, and therefore pursue any kind of relationship;
he’s witty, yes, like Merlin, but also shy and brave and lonely.
But the difference between Smallville and Merlin is that in Smallville, there is the closure I would have liked to see in Merlin:
Clark kent does hide his secrets, and he is good at it, until everyone else finds out about him, all on their own.
We’re talking about everyone (maybe because Clark/Merlin are not as sly as they think):
Lex and Lionel and Luthessa Luthor, Lana Leng, Chloe Sullivan, Pete Ross, Oliver Queen and so many others, either because they already had their suspicions or because someone else showed them.
And this brings the right amount of angst in the show, mixed with the betrayal and the lies and the secrets and the love triangles and the tropes that come out of them.
But where is Arthur in this picture?
Oh, this is the good bit.
For very obvious reasons, apart from the fact that he doesn’t talk as much as her, Arthur is definitely Lois Lane.
FROM THIS MOMENT ON, SPOILERS AHEAD FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN’T WATCHED SMALLVILLE:
Lois Lane makes her appearance as a main character in the later seasons, after Clark understands that he has officially lost Lana, and starts working at the Daily Planet, in the same office as Lois.
But, unlike Arthur, Lois loves Superman (or The Blur, as he’s called for the entire ten seasons of Smallville, because he’s always caught on camera, but just as a blur). She talks to him in secret, and Clark masks his voice through the phone, he helps her and she helps him, he saves her innumerable times (does this remind you of anything?), and each time Lois compliments The Blur, Clark gets angry, because it’s his alter ego who gets the praise for a job well done, and not him, the clumsy idiot of the Daily Planet, much like everyone else in Merlin’s life has always got the credit for saving Arthur’s life, instead of him.
But what they should have given us in Merlin is what they gave us in Smallville, and it would have honestly made for the biggest magic reveal:
once Clark needs to fend off another enemy of the year, and thinks he’s going to officially die, he goes to say goodbye to his friends and his most loved ones, Lois included (“I’m happy to be your servant, until the day I die”).
Although, unlike in Merlin, where Arthur is a sweet himbo, who doesn’t inspect, and who doesn’t suspect anything, Lois had her suspicions, given that she and Clark had not only started falling in love, but now worked together too, and since she cared a whole lot about him, she follows Clark.
In the Smallville TV show, Lois hides behind a building from where, minutes later, Clark falls from. Lois believes he’s dead (Clark is immortal, and this begs the questions again: does he remind you of anyone?), and notices that he’s been stabbed in the chest with a blue crystal (context: the blue kryptonite removes Clark’s powers, and renders him human, and therefore mortal, unless the kryptonite, much like the green one, gets away from him). Following her guts, and sad and desperate that the man she loves the most might die, and believing in her suspicions and instinct, Lois pulls the crystal from Clark’s body, but the moment she hears some clutter, probably thinking they’re the enemies, she runs away, and goes back hiding.
And there, she sees him.
Clark grunts, gets up, completely safe ad healthy, sees that the crystal may have fallen by itself, or simply disappeared (and actually asks himself how that could have happened) and runs away:
by using his super fast power.
And Lois sees him.
Now, what could have been perfect was, if Arthur did the same.
After an attack gone wrong in the woods and losing sight of Merlin, he goes searching for the idiot, yelling something very along the lines of, “Where’s that useless buffoon?”, when he’s actually worried sick, and finds Merlin stabbed in the middle of a clearing.
Now, Arthur despises magic. He loathes it, he doesn’t trust it, yet, bless him, he still tries to understand it. This could have happened after Uther’s death, the moment Arthur’s reign begins.
He watches Merlin.
Arthur’s alone and shocked and scared and sick, so he drops to his knees next to him. He does not cry, he does not scream, he does not faint, that’s not really him at the end of the day, right? (Lois is the same. She grew up in a strict household with a strict solider father, and has lost her mother, and she had to be the parent to her older sister… Very, very much like Arthur). Or that’s what he thinks, and out of pure desperation, and something that sounds a bit like love, just like Lois Lane, since Merlin flinches, when he should be dead, for goodness’ sake, and out of instics and probably destiny, Arthur pulls whatever has stabbed Merlin out of his abdomen.
But as soon as he does, and as soon as he hears the knights coming close to him, and not to alarm anyone, and because he does not want them to see him in this sort of shocked state, Arthur hides behind a tree.
And there, he watches as Merlin, half dead and half alive, calls for Kilgharrah.
And Arthur has the same reaction of the finale.
He does not act on what he just discoveres.
At first, he’s sceptical, once Merlin comes back like he always does (and now he knows why and how), so he avoids him, he makes awful jokes, or hints about magic and about how powerful and dangerous it can be.
But once he’s sort of gone over this phase, noticing that Merlin hasn’t done anything with his big powers, like showing him off or anything of the likes (because Arthur has always known, magic or not, that Merlin would have never hurt him or Camelot), Arthur becomes… Curious.
And here comes the part that aligns with Smallville (we can also add the sexuality/gender identity/coming out metaphor):
much like in Smallville, and with magic and superpowers, and like in real life, someone does not force this information out of people, but Arthur, like Lois, is dying of curiosity, and just wants Merlin/Clark to trust him/her and tell him/her his secret, because he/she already knows of it.
So Arthur starts doing what Lois did.
The day after everything is well, and Lois now certainly knows about Clark’s superpowers, and the fact that he is The Blur, she goes to work, until Clark arrives too, and tells her that he must be quick for something, and needs some documents for a research. Lois stalls, and pretends she’s being SUDDENLY clumsy and a bit of an idiot (this would go perfectly well with Arthur, because he is an idiot, and he is also smitten with Merlin), and let her pen fall under the desk, to see what Clark would do.
And he uses his powers.
So imagine a wild Arthur in his natural habitat (his chambers), bored like no one else, and on the verge of imploding, because his manservant and best friend and love of his life he’s being stubborn and an oaf and an idiot and a toad.
He lets the apples or the sword or the belt fall under the table, pretends he’s keen to an act of kindness, and picks up the items himself, instead of letting Merlin do it, while he instructs said servant to do something else in the meantime.
Shocked at first, but following through with the orders, Merlin does as he’s being told, after throwing several sceptical looks at his prat of a king, and as soon as Arthur gets up from his crouched down position on the floor, the bed is already done, and the clothes are already folded, and Arthur goes mad, because, oh, he was right, and what else can Merlin do?
The curiosity gets him as much as his developing feelings for the cretin, with apparently super magical powers, who could also break a neck with a flick of his eyes, if he wanted to, and Arthur starts pretending to be even more of an idiot to see more magic, without Merlin knowing that he’s actually showing Arthur his abilities.
And the best part of it all?
The magic reveal.
I love Smallville, because the way Clark confesses his secret to Lois isn’t anything grand or majestic.
Yes, Clark does take Lois flying; yes, he also shags the living brains out of her, IN THEIR FARMS IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE (I must do this again but, does this remind you of ANYONE/ANYTHING IN PARTICULAR?), but he’s just built and hot and intelligent, but also very, very shy and a bit silly.
That’s why I love Clark the most as the best version of Superman, and Merlin as the best version of the famous wizard.
So Clark calls Lois to meet him in one of the Daily Planets departments, where documents and papers are stashed and kept there, on the last floor of the building, and where no one ever goes, and he fidgets a bit with his fingers, and he stammers a lot, and Lois is about to lose it, because still, after all these years, and our love? And how can Clark not tell me? Does he not trust me? Does he not want me like I want him? And all these emotions are well encompassed on her face, because Clark fails to tell her, and he says that he’s sorry, he can’t lose her, he can’t take that risk, he has lost so many loved ones already, and what does Lois do?
She understands, because she loves Clark, and she does not want to force him.
She gulps her tears, she miles brokenly, she nods, she tells Clark that it’s fine, but when she’s about to turn on the elevator, Clark realises that the love of his life is about to slip away from his fingers, and just blurts his secret out like a bloody moron.
Much like Merlin would do.
“I’m The Blur.”, he says, and Lois smiles, she turns around, and she runs to him, and literally jumps him, until they both fall back together, and laugh and stutter out their words and yes… They end up snogging.
Now, I want you to imagine a wild Arthur standing on one of the towers or balconies in the Camelot castle, while Merlin is being the usual insecure, oblivious man Arthur’s known for over ten years, and he turns around at the confession, and he runs to Merlin, and he pulls him to him, and while in this version, Arthur gives Merlin a concussion, as he hits the stone floor (because they are romantic, but also more stupid than Lois and Clark, since they’re, you know, a bloody gay disaster), he snogs the shit out of him too, and they start working together, and getting rid of the enemies together, and form a bond that is even deeper than the one they had before already, and Arthur meets Hunith’s mother as someone else entirely, while the chaos ensue, and so do the messy feelings:
like it happened in Smallville, but did not, because Lord forbid the gays, happened in BBC Merlin.
The knights of The Round table are the other DC superheros, and Guinevere could either be a superhero of her own or the wise and smart counsellor, who would be the journalist in Smallville, and Morgana is still Arthur’ sister, good or evil, it does not matter (she could either be after Merlin or after him, the options are innumerable).
Morgana is basically the obnoxious sister Lois’ has always had, who even gets a fake crush on Clark/Merlin to manipulate the two (these TV shows are too similar, I swear).
But I’m not done.
Oh, no, I’m not.
Because imagine all of this, imagine Smallville, but as a literal crossover with Merlin:
a fanfic where Merlin is the apparent imbecile employee at the Daily Planet, who actually has so many super powers, and he’s invincible, and his boss is Arthur Prat Pendragon, who is sceptical of superheroes, and his father Uther haunts them down, and is the owner of said Daily Planet, and loathes Merlin, because he talks about superheroes in his newspapers, and about his dad, because sodding fucking hell, he could control dragons.
Imagine the mess as these two fall in love, even if Merlin thinks he hates the rich, twat boss, whose order he has to follow, while Arthur treats him like a servant, rather than a journalist; Gwen could be either Chloe or Lana Leng, the best friend or the past lover, and Lancelot becomes Guinevere’s Jimmy or Oliver Queen, and Pete Ross is Will for Merlin, and Uther, is still the mad man they have to defy.
Merlin could have had so much potential, and a plethora of ways to have the magic reveal happen, and yet it was not used, and yes, if you didn’t notice, I’m still so mad over it.
I cannot fathom the amount of happiness I would have felt if they actually merged two of my favourite TV shows ever together, a good crossover between Smallville and the Arthuriana, in this case, BBC Merlin in particular.
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roseetube · 2 months ago
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Been playing around with some aus!!! Magical girl aus are good for the soul!!! ALSO! ALSO!! IM ATTENDING NY COMIC CON ON SATURDAY!!! I swear if the 7 train isn't running, im gonna spontaneously combust!!!!!! And now it's time my mandated 100 tags (well 30, actually)
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zebratimw · 1 year ago
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I still love you (Song: Still in Love with You by Deeps)
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thestellargoblin · 6 months ago
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the fact that i am unable to find even ONE hamilton × epic the musical crossover ff on ao3 is actually a crime
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loveinhawkins · 2 years ago
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Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 ao3
The telltale catch in Steve’s breathing evens out far too quickly for it to be natural. Eddie can feel how he repeatedly holds his breath for a few brutal seconds at a time, trying to force his crying to a stop. It’s done so thoroughly, so efficiently, that Eddie is left with the unavoidable conclusion that it’s a practised skill; that at some point, Steve must have taught himself to cry silently—and to get it over and done with as quickly as possible.
Steve lifts his head up slowly from Eddie’s shoulder. He keeps his eyes low, looking down at the bed, and as he moves, he dislodges Eddie’s hold on him.
Eddie takes the hint and draws back. He’d been stroking one hand through Steve’s hair in a soothing rhythm, but it seemed so natural—done instinctively, almost unconsciously—that it’s only from stopping that he even realises he was doing it in the first place.
“Uh, sorry.”
Steve shakes his head, looks up to meet Eddie’s gaze with a weak but genuine smile.
“No, it’s… just don’t want to fall asleep,” he says. Then he seems to catch himself and amends, “Like, you can, obviously. Don’t let me—”
“Nah, it’s cool.”
Eddie takes his lead from Steve’s tone: that studiously casual air, back to normal, nothing to see here, just drop it.
He can hear the sound of nurses talking in the corridor, fading away as they walk past the door to Steve’s room. With the bedside lamp on, it feels suddenly like when he’d get up early for school in the optimistic first few weeks after summer: the world just on the cusp of waking up, still blurry around the edges.
Eddie squints in the dim light to read the clock on the wall. “Hey, you want food? Kitchens should open for breakfast soon.” Then, before Steve can reply, the thought hits him, and he rambles on, “Shit, I didn’t even—like, have they, um, cleared you for…?”
Steve laughs shakily, brushing away the remaining evidence of tears on his face. Eddie catches him giving a little self-directed wince as he does so, like he’s embarrassed himself, and the thought is quietly devastating.
“Yeah, I can eat. Got a whole bowl of mac and cheese after you left, actually.” Steve shrugs. “Doctors came in with all these charts and when they took the mask off, all I could think to say was ‘I’m starving.’”
Eddie snorts, remembering when he’d walkied Nancy for a food delivery. “Yeah, I get it.”
“Right? Glad someone does, they just stared at me like I was nuts. Still.” Another shrug. “I’m not exactly their first rodeo. Think I recognised some of them from way back, with Will. Guess they figured if I was eating it meant their drug cocktail was working.”
And Eddie knows that this version of events is no doubt highly sanitised—yet even with Steve’s nonchalant delivery, he gets the impression that whatever the doctors greeted him with had been less reassuring and more, you’re out the fucking twilight zone, kid, just be grateful and don’t ask too many questions.
“So, how was it? Give your compliments to the chef?”
“Oh, I, um.” Steve’s nose wrinkles, and he gives an endearing, slightly sheepish smile. “I don’t like mac and cheese, it was just leftover from… I wasn’t really in the position to be picky, you know?”
There’s a sudden, fierce swell of protectiveness in Eddie’s chest. “Well, fuck that. What do you want to eat now? Like, think world’s your oyster kinda shit.”
“Hmm, you might be overselling the options here. Honestly?” Steve pauses, heaves a sigh and says, heartfelt, “Toast.”
Eddie had been resolved to find it, no matter what had been said; hell, Steve could’ve said ‘caviar’ and Eddie’s pretty sure he wouldn’t even have batted an eye.
But as it is, the simplicity of Steve’s answer is unexpectedly moving—that, after everything, this is all he wants. Eddie’s already decided that this’ll be the best goddamn piece of toast in the history of the universe.
“Okay, but like, I need a guide, man. What’s your preference? Cremation levels of burnt or warm bread?”
Steve stares. “What?” His mouth is twitching, pulling up into a smile despite his still red-rimmed eyes.
Eddie sees his chance, and he plays up to it, quipping back, “You gotta give me something to work with.”
Steve laughs. Though it’s still on the quiet side, Eddie can tell it’s a good one, right from the belly. “Sorry, didn’t realise I needed a damn paint chart. Light brown enough for you?”
Eddie nods, carefully rises from the bed so as not to jostle Steve. “Your wish is my command.”
He brings back a plate of toast with entirely too many packets of butter, and Steve looks at him like he hung the moon; when he takes a bite, he says, “This is the best thing I’ve ever eaten.”
Eddie scoffs. “Think you need to raise your expectations.”
“No, I’m serious.” Steve makes a show of tilting the plate this way and that, like it’s on display at an art gallery. “You got the butter right to the corners; that takes skill, dude.”
“If you say so,” Eddie says, and he smiles behind his own cup of coffee.
There’s a gentle lull in the conversation for a few minutes, before Steve says, “You brought your guitar.”
“Yeah, I didn’t, um, really mean to? Just kinda jumped into my hands when I walked out the door.” Now back on the couch, Eddie makes an automatic movement for the guitar, where it stands propped up against the wall. Then he stops himself. “Bet you’re sick of my playing at this point, huh?”
His voice is still light, the perfect set-up for Steve to tease him back, but that doesn’t happen at all. Steve just blinks a few times, like he’s heard something confusing, then says, “No,” so simply that it threatens to put a lump in Eddie’s throat.
So he picks up the guitar. And because it’s second nature by now, feels as natural as breathing, Eddie doesn’t notice that he’s started to play Steve’s song, until he hears Steve give a sharp intake of breath.
“Shit.” Eddie nearly drops the guitar in mortification. “Steve, I’m so sorry, I wasn’t—”
“It’s fine.”
“No, it’s—”
“Eddie,” Steve says firmly, “it’s fine. Please play it?”
And Eddie could never deny him. He doesn’t sing, though, has some kind of instinct that he shouldn’t—because Steve’s eyes start looking far-off about ten seconds in.
Where are you going? Can I help? Can I go with you?
His decision to not sing is soon proven to be the right one—otherwise he might have missed Steve saying, soft as sand, “How long did…?”
Eddie waits. He loses his place for a moment, skips to the chorus. “How long did what?”
But Steve is already shaking his head. “Never mind.”
And he quickly pulls himself away from wherever he’d gone, something dark and melancholy leaving his eyes in a matter of seconds—like it, too, has been forcibly pushed back. He’s not ready, Eddie thinks.
It’s okay. I’ll still be here when you are.
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