#anywho it doesn’t actually matter for reals

[somanyfandomsblog]

“Percy fell first” this “Annabeth fell first” that… y’all we’re watching my babies fall in love in front of our eyes it doesn’t even matter who fell first!!!! The chemistry is chemistry-ing!!!!!!!

It was Annabeth btw but STILL!

(No one come for me pls)

[snowyquokka]

HOME

jeongin x fem reader

cw: angst (😈), breakup, kissing, swearing, mutual pining, mentions of cheating, kinda toxic/asshole seungmin (FORGIVE ME), not proof read bc why tf would i do that (im too lazy so my apologies if some of it doesn’t make sense lmfao-)

wc: 3.1k

a.n - so this is not how it was originally supposed to be 😭 it started as a seungmin fic but spiraled into whatever monstrosity this is lmao. everyone thank @solisyeah for the request ily. anywho i hope it’s good <3

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Seungmin furrows his brows as he inspects the photo on his screen. A photo of you with another guy, in his lap with your face nuzzled into the crook of his neck.

Just like you do with Seungmin.

On the very couch he’s sitting on.

At first he thought it was edited, because there’s no way you’d cheat on him, right? But as he took a closer look he just knew it was real.

He was tired, sore, and downright miserable from a rough day at the studio; he had to take way too many breaks for his liking and this picture was just the thing he needed to send him right off the deep end.

He shot up from his spot on the couch so fast it made his head spin, but that didn’t deter him from storming into your bedroom where you were sitting on the bed, aimlessly scrolling through your phone. Once you see his face you can automatically sense something’s wrong.

“Seung?” You tilt your head as you watch him take your apartment key off of his key ring before placing it on your dresser with a clink.

“Seungmin what are you doing?” You jump off of your bed as he slides his shoes on. He runs his fingers through his hair with a frustrated huff.

“I don’t- I think we just need a break. I need a break.” These words were the last thing you imagined to ever come out of his mouth, in this context especially. Or lack there of.

“Wha- why?” Your eyes glaze over with unshed tears that threaten to spill at any given moment. You don’t want to cry in front of him, you’ve always hated having your raw emotions on display like that, especially in such a powerless situation. “Seungmin, talk to me. What the fuck is going on?”

“Don’t play dumb with me. I’m not stupid.” Seungmin shakes his head “Did you really think you could hide it from me?”

“Hide what, Seungmin?”

“You should’ve just fucking left me. Spared my feelings, maybe. But I guess you’re just too selfish for that.”

Without another word he rushes out of the room, leaving you in shambles with nothing else to do but slide to the floor, curl into yourself and let the sobs take over your body.

Seungmin can hear you crying before he even walks out of the front door, causing his heart to clench in his chest and his gut to twist. Standing with his hand just brushing the door handle, he has to physically force himself to press on, to let you go, to accept his reality. The door slams shut behind him and the noise only pushes you further towards the realization that this is actually happening. You aren’t hallucinating, this isn’t some fucked up fever dream or an even more fucked up prank.

You just wish you knew why. No matter how much you try to put the pieces together, you’re always missing something. You can’t think of anything that could’ve set him off. Everything was perfectly normal less than an hour ago, yet all it took was five minutes to trigger the downward spiral of what feels like the end of the world- the end of your world.

-

“What’re you doing back here?” Jeongin slides next to Seungmin - who is still eyeing up the picture on his screen - on the floor. Jeongin nods towards the phone, “What’s that?”

Seungmin huffs and leans his head against the wall behind him, “I honestly don’t fucking know, I don’t even really want to know, actually.”

Jeongin reaches for the phone, pulling it out of Seungmin’s grasp. His lips part in a silent ‘oh’ as he inspects the photo. He’s assuming Seungmin hadn’t even given you a chance to explain solely based on his reaction, in typical Seungmin fashion. Jeongin turns his body to face the other, his face set in an almost disappointed expression.

“I’m going to say this with the utmost respect and I need you to not cause me any bodily harm-” Jeongin sighs before continuing, “You’re a dumbass. Like the dumbest dumbass I think I’ve ever seen. Like paboracha level dumbass. I’m talking-”

“Are you done?” Seungmin groans and squeezes his eyes shut.

“Are you done? God- you just fucked yourself over. If I were you I’d start praying that she’ll still take you back after all this crazy shit.”

“How did I fuck myself over when she’s the one cheating? Or am I supposed to just forget about that and take the blame for it all like usual? She brought another guy into the same place I spend almost all my time at, and probably fucked hi-” Jeongin slaps his hand over Seungmin’s mouth, effectively silencing him before he could carry on with his bullshit.

“Hyung. Shut up.” The maknae slowly pulls his hand away as Seungmin’s eyebrows shoot upward. “Look I get it, you’re tired, you’re upset, you’re angry bu-”

“Can you fucking blame me? I can’t unsee it. I mean, you see how comfortable she looked with him.” he clenches his fists.

“Will you keep your mouth closed already? You’re killing me here, got a massive migraine now.” Jeongin groans and rubs his temples as he speaks “That picture was taken over a year ago. Before you even knew she existed, hyung. Besides, I know her better than anyone ever will, other than you obviously, which is why I suggest that you get your ass up and go apologize for being such a dumb fuck. Beg for her forgiveness if you gotta. Maybe get on your knees while you’re at it.” he sighs and stands, holding his hand out to Seungmin before pulling him up.

“How do you know she isn’t lying to you? How do you know she isn’t lying about anything else?” Seungmin finally says.

“Because she loves you too much to do that to you. God, have you always been this dense? You seriously need to wake up and realize how stupid you sound.” Jeongin mocks, prompting Seungmin to glare at him one last time before walking out of the studio. All the while unbeknownst to the younger standing with a frown threatening to pull at the corners of his mouth.

“He’s a fucking idiot if he let’s her go over this,” he mutters begrudgingly while he listens to the soft pur of Seungmin’s car in the distance.

-

Almost a week later you’re still waking up with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. The first thing you notice is Seungmin’s apartment key still sitting on the dresser untouched. Well, it used to be his. You were really hoping that it was all just a shitty nightmare and that you’d still be tucked in his side with his soft snores being the only sound to fill the room even though it’s been days.

You realize what had stirred you awake as another knock fills the almost suffocating silence. You’re half tempted to just ignore it, but something in your gut tells you to answer it.

“Oh, uhm- hi Innie.” you wipe your eyes with the sleeve of your hoodie. Or Seungmins hoodie, rather.

God you need to pull yourself together. How could you not even realize what you were wearing. Fuck.

“Hey,” Jeongin rocks back on his heels somewhat awkwardly, “Can I come in?”

You nod and mumble a soft ‘of course‘ as you move out of the way for him to slip past the threshold and into your apartment while you take a moment to collect yourself, and to put on the most convincing smile you can possibly muster.

“What’s up?” you find a spot on the couch next to him as he scans the room for a second, looking for any signs of whether or not Seungmin actually showed.

“He’s not here, is he?” Jeongin turns to you with sympathetic eyes, finding your own longing for comfort, seemingly pleading him for some sort of consolation.

“N-no but he’ll probably be back so-”

“He’s not coming back, y/n. If he was, it would’ve been days ago.”

Before you can open your mouth to protest, Jeongin has you pulled into his strong chest and tucks your head under his chin gently. “It’s okay, baby. I got you.” he sighs, rubbing small and slow circles on your back just the way he knows you like. He places a small, chaste kiss on the top of your head because he’s learned over the years that the action relaxes you and makes you feel secure.

Jeongin knows you like the back of his hand. Sometimes he thinks he knows you better than he knows himself. He knows your favorite food, your favorite season, your favorite movie. He knows how much you love to read, having periodically skimmed your shelves for books you may have and promptly buying you ones that you haven’t already buried your nose in.

Most importantly, he knows exactly what to say in order to subside your bad moods (he’s well seasoned in this field), and that sometimes you say things you don’t mean yet he never - and will never - hold that against you.

He knows just how much you loved Seungmin, not even wanting to imagine the amount of absolute heartbreak you’re feeling. Despite all this, he can’t help but feel somewhat relieved. You and Seungmin undoubtedly wouldn’t have worked in the long run and that’s exactly what you desire and deserve: a stable, long term relationship where you’d be taken care of and treated like the absolute goddess that Jeongin thinks you are.

He just wishes you give him a chance to treat you like his- more so than he already does now.

“Thank you, In,” you mumble into his chest.

“You don’t need thank me, baby. You know I’m always here.”

You did know that, you’ve always known that. Jeongin doesn’t let you doubt how much he cares for you, he’ll spend every waking moment reminding you if he has to.

You pull back slightly to look into his eyes. “I always end up burdening you with my problems.” Jeongin’s eyes soften at your apology and all he wants to do is hug and kiss and cuddle you until he thinks he’s convinced you enough of his adoration.

But for now all he can do is settle for words, though he can’t help but think it won’t be enough.

“Baby, please don’t be sorry for that. What kind of best friend would I be if I never listened to your complaints or rants?” Calling himself your best friend took more out of him than it should have and he tries to hide his hesitation. Thankfully you hadn’t noticed.

Hearing Jeongin say this makes you realize that he’s treated you better than any boyfriend you’ve ever had. Seungmin never reassured you like Jeongin does. Actually, now that you think about it, Seungmin didn’t do half of the things Jeongin does, even if it was the bare minimum.

He’s always like this, but why does it feel different now?

That’s just his personality, right? There isn’t any hidden meaning behind his words or gestures. Or the way he’s holding you and speaking to you like you’re the most precious thing he’s ever had contact with. The sudden urge to reach out and cup his face is unreal. You just want to make sure you aren’t hallucinating. You wonder how you managed to find such a perfect person who thinks the world of you just as much as you do them. Someone who loves you just as deeply and truly as you do.

Wait what?

You’ve singlehandedly scared and confused yourself all at once now. Obviously you love him and he does you, but it feels as though you love him in a different way. A special way, one that you don’t think you’ve ever felt for anyone. Not even Seungmin, who you once thought was hands down your soulmate.

What you failed to realize, however, was that your soulmate has been here the whole time, and he’s holding you in his arms like he never wants to let you go.

You cut off your train of thought because he doesn’t want you like that and you’re making assumptions that could get you hurt.

Too late.

Another wave of sadness that has nothing to do with Seungmin washes over you.

“Baby? Hey, where’d you go?” Baby. Fucking baby. He’s got to stop calling you that. You want to tell him to stop, so why can’t you open your mouth and form those simple words.

“Mhm, ’m okay.” You can’t even bring yourself to put the tiniest bit of distance between your bodies.

You mentally scream at yourself for sounding so noticeably pathetic. He must think you are. How could he not when you’re making it so painfully obvious?

“Don’t hide from me, baby. You know you don’t need to hide anything from me.” How ironic.

“I’m not- I just-” you huff and lean your forehead against Jeongin’s chest. God, when did he get so…buff? Has he always been like this?

He pulls your head back to force your gaze to meet his. “What did I tell you, hm? Talk to me. I’m all ears.” His arms encircling your body is the last straw before the world comes crashing down on you.

Tears flood your vision and you aren’t even sure as to why you’re crying this time.

Pathetic and dramatic. Great.

Jeongin immediately thinks he’s overstepped now, he took it too far and made you uncomfortable. He removes his hands from you immediately though the action kills him inside, when in reality you want the exact opposite. You want him to pull you closer, you want your chest flush against his to the point where you can feel his heart beating.

“I’m sorry, Innie. I’m sorry.” You finally climb out of his grasp and step away from him. He follows you and with every step he takes forward you move backward until you collide with the wall.

“Why are you sorry when you didn’t do anything wrong? I don’t want you apologizing to me for no reason. If anyone should be apologizing it’s Seungmin, but it’s his fault and his loss, you know that.” You wish Jeongin would stop being so supportive, it’s making it ten times harder to ignore your surfacing issues.

“That’s not the problem, Jeongin.”

Since when did you call him by his full name?

“Then what is it? Is it me? Please I- I just want to help you.”

Your tears have finally halted and you couldn’t be more thankful. You need to be able to properly look into his eyes.

“You can’t help me.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do.”

“Why are you being so difficult all of a sudden?”

“I’m not.” You cross your arms over your chest.

Jeongin blows out a frustrated huff. “Why can’t you tell me? Is it because Seungmin and I are friends becau-”

“I love you.”

“I know you do, which exactly is why you should be talking to me right now instead of bottling it all up-”

“No, Jeongin. I love you. Not in a friend way, not in a platonic way. I want to kiss you and hold you and-” You’ve worked yourself up so much you have cut yourself off in order to calm down.

Jeongin’s mouth stays agape for a solid five seconds before he even processes what you’ve said. “You love me?”

“Is that not what I just said?” Jeongin has to bite back his smile at your remark but quickly frowns again at the expression on your face. You look regretful, like you wish you never spoke. You’re just waiting for his rejection, willing it to come faster so you he’ll leave and you can wallow in self pity by yourself in the comfort of your bed. You disturbed the peace that was your friendship.

“I- the breakup is still fresh and you aren’t thinking straight, baby. Don’t say things you don’t mean.” Jeongin pleads. Is he trying to convince you or himself?

“But I do mean it Jeongin. I really do and I can’t believe it took me this fucking long to figure it out and I wish I’d never caught feelings because this is just a shit show now.”

He goes to speak but you quickly interrupt him. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. Just forget about it,” you expect him to leave, or to at least move away. But he doesn’t, instead he leans in closer to your ear and whispers in a hushed tone,

“Didn’t I just tell you to stop apologizing, baby?” The way he says ‘baby’ sends shivers down your spine, it’s different than the other times he’s called you that. This time his words actually do have a hidden meaning. His breath ghosts the shell of your ear for a moment before he slowly pulls back to look at you. As if he hasn’t studied your every feature to the point where you’re engraved in his mind.

“You have to promise me that you actually understand what you’re saying and that it isn’t the post breakup neediness talking.” He looks at you sternly and fully expecting a response in words.

You, on the other hand, have absolutely no intention of speaking as you instead grab him by the collar of his hoodie before pressing your lips against his.

Kissing your best friend is much more intimate than you ever expected. He kisses you like it’s not the first time and with more than enough purpose. It starts off aggressive but soon simmers down into a delightfully slow and passionate rhythm and as cliche as it sounds, it’s in this moment that you finally know where you belong, where your home is.

No matter the circumstances, Jeongin always left a space for you in his heart. His subconscious wouldn’t let him fill it with someone else even if he wanted (which he didn’t), forever waiting for you to find the spot with your name written all over it and stay there for as long as you may live.

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tags: @skzstarnet @godslino @myseungsunglove @seungseung-minmin @azuna-sz @chanyeolsrealwife

[ithinkabouttzu]

omg feel free to ignore but can you do BoB headcanons of having a female medic s/o with big boobs 🙏

Easy co.’s reaction to having a nurse s/o with big boobs

genre: Fluff; suggestive

warnings: Language, suggestion (sorry guys)

description: Easy company’s men reaction to you (their s/o) being their nurse and having big boobs.

a/n: Hey!! Sorry I totally didn’t see the medic part and I accidentally wrote it as nurse i’m so sorry 😭 Anywho, just a reminder that this isn’t any hate towards any itty-bitty-titty community at all! (love you guys for real!) Also, some of these might seem like they’re sexualizing the reader but please don’t take it that way, it’s all supposed to be about love!! Hope you enjoy reading <3

Taglist: @sweetxvanixlla @ronsparky @samwinchesterslostshoe @executethyself35 @linhkhanhcps @1waveshortofashipwreck @grumpy-liebgott @barbeygirl (if you want to be added to the taglist, let me know!)

Dick Winters: - He tries to be the most respectful, it’s inappropriate to look at your body that way and he really respects you.

- But he also is fighting himself from blushing when he sees how your figure looks in your nurses uniform

- He finds you beautiful regardless though, no matter what your chest size is (even tho he’s had a very hard time trying not to stare)

Lewis Nixon: - his eyes get really big when he sees you in your nurse uniform, your cleavage out almost perfectly.

- His throat becomes dry, he feels the urge to drink water, lots of it from his recent thirst, but it seems the only thing he’s thirsty for is you.

- After seeing only men for the past months, and you being the first women he sees in the hospital, he almost dies flat out and he would be completely happy to do so

Carwood Lipton: - He doesn’t even notice at first, he only looks when you have to reach across his body in order to find a good vein.

- His face gets so red, one because he’s guilty for looking, another because he’s absolutely in awe of the beautiful things in front of him

- He still tries to not objectify you, but he truly finds you beautiful in general. He can’t help but get goosebumps at the thought of seeing you again

Joe Toye: - Man when he sees you in that nurses dress, after almost a year of seeing only the men around him, he gets so close to losing it

- He literally starts drooling at the mouth whenever he sees you, you’re like a dream come true, an answer to every single one of his prayers.

- When you do get close to him it’s like he can’t breathe, your body only clouds his mind with unholy thoughts and the dying urge to feel your pretty chest. He’s absolutely desperate for you and getting to know you for the rest of his stay at the hospital.

Joe Liebgott: - NOW WE ALL KNOW THIS MAN IS HAVING THE TIME OF HIS LIFE When he sees you, he actually does lose it, a big smile rising onto his face as though the girl of his dreams is now assigned as his nurse

- He’s an absolute slut for you. Like he’s gonna try his absolute best to make you his, whatever he has to do, he’ll do it. He can’t help but flirt with you any chance he can get.

- When it’s getting close to the end of his stay, he’s dreading it. Only wishing to see you everyday. He’ll practically beg to see you again sometime, or if he can write to you. And being good friends you say yes, making him the happiest man alive.

Bill Guarnere: - He’s probably the biggest flirt you’ve had as a patient. The look on his face is the equivalence of a kid in a candy store for the first time. He’s quick to introduce himself to you, bringing out his best charm for you

- “You always walk around looking like that? It’s killin’ me, doll, and you know it” He would whisper in your ear as you take care of him. It’s hard not to give in when he’s so enticing like this, his voice sending you chills when he talks to you so romantically.

- He’d promise he’d write to you once he gets better, making sure that once the war was over, he’d find you again and take you out the right way.

George Luz: -He gets so smiley when he sees you, he doesn’t mean to stare at your chest, in his defense your chest was kinda staring at him first, your uniform was a bit tight in the upper half making you a bit more revealed, but he didn’t mind one bit.

-He was actually rather joyful, whenever he saw you, you brought his hopes up a bunch. It always made him so happy to see you. Just being around a women and getting to be taken care of by you was a dream.

- He loves every second that he has with you, I could definitely see him being quite smitten with you after you taking such good care of him.

Eugene Roe: - He gets super shy around you and finds it pretty hard to make eye contact for the longest. He never thought he’d be the one to end up hurt, especially when he was supposed to be the one to help people get better, but being around you makes things a lot better.

- Sometimes he’d like to imagine that you guys are together while you’re taking care of him and when he’s really sad. just a lovely girlfriend taking care of her sick boyfriend is what he sees in his head (even tho he knows that’s not the case)

- When you ask if he’d like for you to write letters, he almost finds it impossible that a gorgeous girl like you, would want him to be your man. He’s estatic and would say yes immediately.

Bull Randleman: - It’s love at first sight for him. “Wow” is all he can say under his breath when he sees you for the first time. It’s an amazing sight.

- In the most non-offensive way possible, you’re like a wet dream come true to him. A sweet, pretty girl, with the prettiest tits known to man, taking care of him while he’s hurt.

- It’s like a dream for the rest of his time there. He waits and counts down the hours until you take care of him again, he’s just so happy to be in your presence.

Floyd Talbert: - After everything he’s endured the past months, you’re the best thing he’s ever seen. Literally a gift from God. You and your amazing top half mesmerizing him by the way you do practically anything.

- He looks forward to every-time he sees you. And when he does he’s flirting with you nonstop. “You know, when all this is over with, I would love to get to know you better.”

- He’s gotta a staring problem really bad, he tries to stop, but he can’t help it. You’re the first woman he’s laid eyes on in so long and he just can’t get enough of your body.

Skip Muck: - “Christ in heaven, you’re the best thing i’ve seen my entire life” He says when you walk to his bed, urgent for your care. “How are you today beautiful? Do I need to fight any fellas for giving you a problem?” He’s very playful with you, but there’s only truth to his words.

- He thinks you’re so pretty though, he’s like a schoolgirl crushing on her teacher, anticipating for your arrival everyday, and being a pet to you everytime you are around.

- When his stay is ending, he finally confesses his feelings to you, letting you know how much he actually enjoys spending time with you, and how he would love to see you after the war.

Don Malarkey:- He’s like a little boy around you, so cheerful and happy. When he first met you he was struck by your pretty face, and its was no surprise that your chest was perfect too.

- He tries being respectful every time you’re around, but it’s hard not to steal a glance at your pretty chest every now and then. You never fail to send butterflies down his body when you get close to him too.

-He’s extra sweet to you always, calling you ma’am respectfully, asking if he can do anything for you despite his physical condition. He’s just very happy to have a positive energy like you around him.

Babe Heffron: - “My goodness, what have I done to deserve you” He says when he sees you walk over to him, it doesn’t even matter if he’s hurt, he can’t feel it anymore. Only thing he can feel is a burning desire for you.

- You’ll catch him staring towards you a lot, he doesn’t even try to hide his staring eyes. He is truly fascinated with you.

- When his stay gets cut short, he asks you if you’d like for him to write to you, it was the sweetest you’d ever saw him. When you said yes he would grab you in a hug and swing you around with joy.

Shifty Powers: - He’s the most respectful out of all the guys. He’s well aware of how perfect your chest is, but he’s not going out of his way to make you uncomfortable at all. He’s pretty mature about it.

- But he does find you beautiful, to him, your body is obviously amazing, but you are so much more to him then just a nice nurse with pretty tits. You’re amazing girl that he would love to know more of.

- He probably would tell you how he feels later on once his time there was up, it he would be super nice and respectful about it.

Frank Perconte: - He’s like a dog to a bone, absolutely enamored with you and your smokin’ body (as he would like to call it)

- “What a dame” He’d say under his breath, suddenly in the need of water by your nice looks. He’s definitely gotta staring problem (he really can’t help it 😭)

- “When all this is over with, you wanna come home with me, pretty girl?” He would flirt with you until he physically can’t anymore

Ronald Speirs: - He doesn’t want to give you a huge reaction, but if you could read his mind, you’d be surprised about the things he’d been thinking about….

- “Doll, do you know the effect that you leave on half of the guys in this place? I can’t tell you what all they’d do just to touch you”

- In all, he’s mesmerized by your body and the way you move. Even in the most basic moments, he just can’t help but watch you do your job.

Skinny Sisk: - “You’re my nurse, wow. Is it my lucky day or somethin’?” When he sees you, he’s so happy that you’re gonna be the one taking care of him

- He’s a big simp for you, if you need anything, someone to talk to, help (if he’s physically able) then he’s more then willing to do it.

- He’s so smiley and happy around you it’s so sweet!! He tries not to stare at your amazing rack but he thinks you’re the prettiest he’s ever seen.

Chuck Grant: - “Golly, am I in heaven?” He thinks you’re an absolute angel after all of the hell he’s seen. If good looks could kill, he’d be willing to die under your watch.

- He has to remind himself constantly than your eyes are “up there” instead of anything otherwise, but he can’t concentrate on anything when you’re in the room (for obvious reasons ofc)

- He’s well behaved on the most part though, just a sweet bby who loves your chest like it’s nothing LOL

Johnny Martin: - He actually feels so much better when he finds out you are gonna he his nurse. Christmas day came early for him (a pretty girl with nice tits was for sure on his list)

- “What are you doin’ here? Shouldn’t you be performing at some show or something, you’re too pretty to work” He doesn’t understand why you’re having to move a finger tbh, you’re too precious to him 😭

- “I had a nice time with you while I was here, if you ever wanna write to me, you can, doll” He honestly gets kinda sad when he knows he won’t be able to wake up to your pretty face (and tits) everyday.

David Webster: - Tbh you’re the real reason why he’s in the hospital for so damn long 🤣 like the moment he met you he just had to be around you at all times

- He stares a lot, and has a quite bit of dirty daydreams containing your chest and him 😭

- Honestly he didn’t even think he was a boobs guy until he met you, you really changed him for the better

Buck Compton: - He’s this emoji: 🤤, actually drooling at the mouth, you look so good to him.

- He’s never been happier to be in a hospital at the moment, your presence is enough to bring him back to full health tbh

- He’s super thankful in general that he has such a pretty and well rounded (see what I did there ) nurse taking care of him while he’s down

Thank you for your request! If you enjoyed, make sure to reblog or like! 🩷

[olinblogin]

Will you write a Yandere azure lion x fem reader please?😃

Yees :3

I’ll be real I had a bit more of field day on this one making the reader fight back :3

YANDERE AZURE LION X FEM!READER

(TW/CWs — bad ending, reader stabs Azure in the eye, brief detailed gore, reader doesn’t reciprocate)

All was quite well in the brotherhood, banquets each night, lighthearted stories from Wukong of his endeavors in the celestial realm… it was quite nice.

Being the only woman in the brotherhood was actually a bit funny, especially when fighting. Enemies would just assume you couldn’t fight because of the sheer fact you’re a woman, and then you end up kicking their asses proper.

It was another night sat around the table, you were sat between Macaque and YellowTusk. Wukong was telling one of his stories once more, one you’ve heard dozens of times. Even if the amount of times you heard it was likely in the triple-digits, it was still enjoyable. Though you couldn’t help but zone out.

You’ve been recalling how odd Azure Lion has been acting lately.

You’d catch him staring, and he’d always turn his head away quickly.

It got to the point where tonight you made a mental note to confront him of it. Eventually dinner passed, everyone was doing their own things.

You made your way to Azure, tapping his arm. He fur on his arm immediately stood on end, head whipping around to look at you. “Oh— [Y/N]! My apologies, I didn’t see you..” he said with the underlying tremor of nervousness in his voice, ears flattening with embarrassment. “Azure, could I talk to you in private for a moment? I want to speak with you about something.” You said, not acknowledging his statement. He nodded deftly, following you as you brought him into a nearby clearing in the forest where you could speak with privacy.

“Azure, you’ve been acting odd lately. What’s going on?” You asked, crossing your arms and tucking them close to your chest. “I’m afraid I don’t know what you are talking about..” Azure would say with avoidance, playing dumb and averting his gaze.

“Don’t act so coy. You know what I’m talking about. Especially earlier… you keep looking at me strangely and you get all weird when I talk to you. What is your deal?” It’s obvious that Azure did not expect to be confronted about this at all.

His shoulders were tense and he let out a little sigh, deciding to get it over with and say what he wanted to say for the longest time.

“It’s because I.. [Y/N], I think I love you.”

There was a long silence passing by the two of you.. you truly didn’t know what to say… you’d have to let him down softly; you didn’t feel the same way.

“I’m sorry Azure but.. I really don’t feel the same way. I hope we can stay friends..?”

Azure’s ears flattened.. but instead of understanding his face twisted with anger; his muzzle wrinkling in anger at your rejection, no matter how kindly you had rejected him.

“You dare defy me..?! If you won’t accept my confession willingly, I’ll make you accept it by force.”

Azure tried to reach out and grab you, to which you acted quickly by pulling out a knife you smuggled form the dinner; plunging it deep into his eye.

Azure howled in agony as you twisted and dug the knife into his eye. You ripped it out with force. Azure stumbled back, nursing his now severely injure eye as blood and vitreous humor pouring down his face.

Eventually you got ahold of yourself, snapping out of your shock… you turned on your heels and dashed quickly into the forest, never to be seen again by the brotherhood, or anyone for that matter.

Yet Azure kept nursing his now destroyed eye, staring off in the direction you ran… he didn’t chase after you. It was futile anywho; you were one of the swiftest of them that is… he deeply regretted everything. He regretted lashing out and trying to grab you; scaring you so bad.

“I’m sorry [Y/N]. I’ll find you eventually, my dear.”

[jimxnslight]

Listen here, I need more of that car scene because what do you mean he was staring at her with his hand on her wrist? WHILE SHE’S BASCIALLY ON TOP OF HIM??? WITH HIS DARK STRUCTURED EYEBROWS I LOVE HIS EYEBROWS. That other anon was right because I cannot get that scene out of my head. Jungkook in a suit makes me weak. Jungkook demanding something makes me weaaaak. If oc doesn’t want him I will gladly take him and I won’t poison his expensive whiskey collection. I’ll make sure he sleeps nice and sound without a worry in the world because he deserves all the rest he needs for being such a big alpha male in the mafia industry. Sexy man with a sexy gun.

It’s 2 am and I have a fucking 8 am class. Let me kms cause I dunno why it was such a great idea to sign up for an early class and tell me why it’s almost a full class?? Who is functioning that early and eager to learn about macro economics? Not me I’ll tell you that. It was either 8 am or 5 pm slot and hell no am I staying on campus that late especially once the sun starts setting at 5 pm. I have no clue why I’m blabbing all of this to you but I guess as a fellow uni student you must understand the struggle of trying to pay attention during lectures. Assignments are fine for the most part but when I’m in class I cannot retain any knowledge. I’m too distracted by the guy who sits a row in front of me because he plays Tetris on his laptop and this other girl is always on Amazon adding stuff to her cart but never checking out which I relate cause I’m broke but we can pretend we have money and I’m nosyyyytt I wanna see what she’s pretending to buy. Girlie has a whole shark vacuum, some sort of memory foam couch pillows, and I think these mini cute ghost string lights…oddly specific but her list gets a pass in my book. I wish I could write like you. I would be creating novels during lecture and everybody would think I’m taking the best notes ever. Anywho I’m guessing your bias is jimin, mines is Yoongi and I will defend that man until my last breath. Jungkook is my bias wrecker, that piece of shit is too attractive for no reason. I can’t wait until Hobi comes back and I can’t wait for the next chapter!!! My adhd likes to get a hold of me when it’s deep into the night. So sorry but I’m just tryna tell you I love your writing lol. Hope you got that message

THE ADHD IS SO STRONG IN THIS IM ACTUALLY CRYING 😭😭😭

I mean ur so real for that, like it’s Jeon Jungkook in a suit being commanding and we’re just girls 🎀 But not you trying to steal Jungkook from Y/N, that man is married must I remind you 🤨📸

I actually cannot relate to the lecture thing (sorry lol) bc I’m online and thankfully we don’t have lectures, just modules. But I do remember when I did go on campus for a week I could not for the life of me keep myself awake during lectures (I also decided to be studious and booked the 8AM classes like a fool). But uni is a struggle no matter what, like I JUST did an exam where it just randomly submitted in the middle of me taking it and now I’m waiting for my prof to email me back about the issue while praying that he’s merciful enough not to just fail me immediately 🤠 so yeah, here’s to self-inflicted suffering ✨

Thank you so much! Trust me it’s not as hard as it seems, everything improves with practice. Maybe you can start out with smaller stories and eventually when ur comfortable enough move onto larger ones? Don’t hesitate to ask me if you need any help or tips, I’d be more than happy to help!

[multiversxwhore]

Call Your Father.

Drew McIntyre x Desiree Simons

a/n: don’t mind me I’m literally bored, I wanted to post something so badly, so here a little something to take the edge off(more so for me than you). Honestly this is wee bit unhinged lol This might end up on my main blog by accident bc yet again tumblr app hates me. Anywho, hope y’all like this little tidbit. Wrestling blog: @slutouttanowhere

“What do you mean your father doesn’t know about us? We’ve been dating for a year!” I sat in Drew’s dressing room, I had originally come here to get a few kisses in before the show tonight. While the intense make out session was had, it only took a second for Drew’s brain to jump back to work. Which led to him remembering to ask me for the update about him meeting my dad. Unfortunately for me, this man doesn’t forget anything. He was now holding me at arms length, and though he was smiling, I knew it was him repressing his irritation.

“I know I just never got around to it!” I rolled my eyes, threw my head back, and let my weight drop into his hands. He huffed out in frustration, we bicker about a lot of things, but this is starting to feel like an actual argument. Family meant a lot to Drew, it’s his life line, and that wasn’t something I was used to. Growing up my dad worked a lot, and by the time I became an adult, I too became very busy. I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

“You yap about me to everyone else, oh my god my man Drew is so amazing, he’s so smart, he’s so funny. Yet, I didn’t come up not bloody once to you um I don’t know, the man that raised you?” He mocked my voice, his tone going up in oactive, I wasn’t sure rather to be impressed, or insulted.

I stood up from the chair he placed me in, I didn’t know what to do with this ball of nerves that were bundled inside of me. “Ugh, you wanna know the real reason why I never said anything?” I asked, I was hoping he would say no.

“Please, lighten me.” His hands placed on his lips like a father, I pressed my lips together trying to take this situation seriously.

I glanced up at him from underneath my lashes, he waited for me, his eyebrows raised, and arms now folded across his broad chest. It’s as if he already knew some bullshit was about to come out of my mouth. I let out a deep breath, “My dad thinks you’re Black.” I blurted out in a rush. I cringed inwardly expecting him to be upset, but I was met with quite the opposite reaction.

Drew burst out into laughter, shaking his head, his tone halfheartedly, “What? Sabrina, you're killin’ me lass. Not only did you not tell him about me specifically…you lied about my race?”

“They got Black people in Scotland don’t they?” I asked sheepishly. I let out a spout of laughter, wrapping my arms around his waist, and tilting my head up to look at him.

He met me halfway, dropping a few sweet kisses on my lips, “You are a mess, you know that?”

“I’m sorry, I just got nervous, you know my dad is like super pro Black. He’s practically Killmonger, and I felt like I’ve disappointed him somehow.” I confessed, though my dad and I aren’t super close, I find myself always clamoring for his approval. Drew’s eyes shifted, a look of understanding, and determination.

“Sweetheart, he’s your father, if he loves you, and I know he does. It shouldn’t matter if I’m fuckin’ Japanese, if he can’t accept your choices as an adult, well then that’s on him.” He kissed me before I had a chance to rebuttal, one hand being my ass, and the other cradling the back of my head as if to make sure I don’t move. He pulled away only to say, “And if he doesn’t like me, that’s too bad because I’m not going anywhere.”

[immunologies]

look at my land developer dawg i’m going to jail 😫

lmao hiiii everyone! i’m anwar (not hadid) + always writing for underused model fcs but anywhooo — thank god for reopening bc i was supposed to app during the first launch but i was on vacation so my activity would’ve flopped real bad BUT… I’M HERE NOW… a lil jet lagged still but fuck it we ball :’) i present to you: iida!

navigate: general info / about / pinterest

sparknotes!

tw / suicide

okawara yosuke, 33 (proud twink death survivor btw he left that long haired era behind in his mid 20s), born and raised in fukuoka prefecture so you know he’s a bearer of the masculinized stereotype that kyushu men have but surprisingly his ego isn’t as fragile as i would expect it to be — i wonder why?

lower middle class to middle class financial status for the entirety of his childhood / it’s one of those things where as a kid you’re like “well, this is it” because you’re not fully aware that your family doesn’t have money on top of being surrounded by other kids who, in return, also come from families without bands so it is what it is / it can’t be that bad when your necessities have always been met

tbh there’s not much to write home about in terms of his childhood as in it was fortunately(?) uneventful for the most part despite starting off rocky: his mom was barely twenty when she birthed him, two freshly married young adults rushed into the hard-bitten chaos of childrearing, do they resent bro in absence of trying to enjoy the beginnings of their married life? probably, but it doesn’t matter by the time his younger brother is born, soo la voo or whatever the french be saying (tiktok reference btw if ur uncool)

yosuke is your average kyushu boy growing up: he spends his time outside rather than inside with his head in the books (it’s the same shit his teachers would always say about his lack of potential, ie: he’s lazy), has boyish fights with his younger and complete opposite of a younger brother, tries his best not to piss off his stay-at-home mom and stay away from his chronically emotionally constipated aviation mechanic drunk for a dad, you get the idea

…UNTIL the voices started to become apparent more than ever and he tells his mother who dismisses it but is reminded of her grandfather who unalived himself from alleged schizophrenia but nobody in her family knows if he ever got tested for it (y’know, if it was a genetic hereditary thing) or if it was just the aftermath of unresolved trauma/ptsd because grandpa fought in the war (you know which war) NOBODY KNOWS A GODDAMN THING. except yosuke as a child hated going to see his relatives in the far village/countryside on his mom’s hick side

lmao but when yosuke told his mom “yeah girly pop dad’s gonna have a shitty liver if he doesn’t stop drinking so much in the next couple years or so” is when she drops his ass off at a mental health facility so she definitely prioritizes her man over a kid that she wasted her 20s raising! (she’s definitely an unevolved libra no shade to yall sorry) but anywho! he’s diagnosed at 17, life is looking brighter(?), but his “schizophrenia” isn’t something talked about much at home because let’s be serious. it’s fucking abe shinzo’s japan at the time, we do not talk about shit like this

yosuke goes on to carry two jobs after high school because his parents didn’t save a college tuition fund for his lazy, non-academically inclined ass so it’s up to him to be the architect of his future / he’s psyched about entering the aviation department of kyoto university after working his ass off by trying to build a humble living but somebody’s bored and filthy rich daughter from a zainichi korean family comes into his life and what does he do? say goodbye to the ol’ pilot dream and traps this woman so he won’t ever have to worry about money like his family did

mind you he actually had love for the old girl! but he’s a gemini and gemini men get bored when you’re not their outstanding type or half as witty or clever as he may be. he knows that he’s settling for what poor lee jiyoung can do for him so after dating in college, yosuke goes on to marry the woman but never goes on to tell her about his “schizophrenia” because he’s scared that it’ll ruin his marriage (spoiler alert: it did)

so uh *scratches head and turns the page* they end up divorcing because his condition worsened as a result of his body becoming “immune” to the medications because he never had schizophrenia in the first place (ie: iida canon) — and he tried saving the relationship for the sake of his position at tk group, he really did, but at the end of the day he’s just some penniless, opportunistic man who failed to completely use up his wife’s beneficiaries. but again, he’s a gemini man who’s good at playing the part of using his “mental health” as a crutch of their failed marriage instead of being exposed for taking advantage of his ex-wife financially

(trust me he’d rather be that Type of Shitty instead of portrayed as the Exploitative Type of Shitty because it gets some pity points on his end. believe the scheme!)

so now? okawara yosuke takes up the tk group’s little passion project proposal with goero because it’s a chance at redemption. he needs to prove one way or another that he’s worthy of his job, that he’s the right man for it, his undying loyalty to the corp (questionable :3), and he’s taken the more political and diplomatic approach of gravitating/winning the trust or appeal to goero’s inhabitants instead of the founding families ‘cause his coworker’s already doing that anyways — he understands his shortcomings as a foreigner (more so as a japanese guy telling yall what to do with the land so goero can prosper financially and commodity-speaking for trade.. and commerce..) so if he can strengthen his morale to the people even if it doesn’t mean the quota won’t be met — yosuke would prefer that for the sake of ethics. he will promise the residents of goero that much: business or not.

that is all. i think. :-) i’ll be yapping for specifics on discord if needed be

personality!

likes to think of himself as an ambivert over being written off as an extrovert which is kinda true? despite being a professional yapper with those he’s suuuuper comfortable with, he finds that people who don’t match or vibe with him tire him out very quickly / genuinely a very friendly person and is emotionally inhibited probably as a result of his career where logic/numbers/analytics are concerned so yosuke prefers to focus on reason over the “possibilities” … even tho he would like to be that optimistic / isn’t one to have an extreme temper, but can be prone to outbursts if incompetence is in question / really. really. hates the notion of being black-or-white on many matters as life usually puts him in the grey area so. u know. atm doesn’t have any ulterior motives because he doesn’t have it in him anymore to be evil or whatever. he ran out of plans. just trying do the right thing from here on out, so, let him help you! bro’s probably a lawful neutral man i know i’m sorry for being boring :/ c’est la vie

connections!

i prefer brainstorming over anything and i’m down for just about everything so hit me

[positivelybeastly]

Dear avengers beast: what would you do if hypothetically you woke up let’s say ~10 years in the future and everyone hated you for somewhat valid reasons (don’t worry Simon doesn’t hate you I don’t think)

Hank looks up from re-ordering his Star Trek DVDs (Wanda wanted to borrow his complete collection of Voyager and he didn't have the heart to tell her no) and quirks an eyebrow.

"Y'know, fella, it strikes me that these are some awfully specific questions to be posing to an awfully specific blue Beastie. Do you know something I don't?"

He shakes his head and slides Enterprise season 3 back into place. Good season, lil' rough, don't much care for the Beauty and the Beast redux episode in the middle of it.

"Honestly, it'd scare the living daylights out of me. You ever think about how much things can change in ten years? It's 2013 now, and you gotta ask yourself, what's gonna happen next? Are Blu-Rays gonna be the next dominant storage media, or is something gonna replace it? Is the world gonna buckle down and work on climate change or nah? Is same-sex marriage gonna become de rigeur, or are people still gonna be weird about it? You never know, ya know?"

Enterprise season 4. God, what a great season. That show got cancelled way before its time. He's still on message boards to this day thinking about what season 5 coulda been like.

"As for me, though . . . Iunno, boychik, what could I really have done to make everybody hate me? I know I get on people's nerves all the time, on account'a my not taking things all that seriously most of the time, but hate's a strong word. Hate's reserved for the real bad stuff in the world, like sub-par macaroni cheese, Count Nefaria and - "

He picks up The Next Generation season 1. Makes a face. He's really tempted to just chuck it.

But he puts it back in order nonetheless.

". . . Anywho. Awright, so let's say I've done something real bad. Fallen into the flowerbed that the big dumb satellite god in the sky says is the death flowerbed for the day, right? Everyone hates me ('cept Wondy, 'cause he can't)."

He touches at the spine of Next Generation season 1 a little, then he shakes his head and smiles a touch. He slides it back out, pops it open, shows off the six discs.

"Real stinker of a season, this one."

"Justice, Naked Now, We'll Always Have Paris, Angel One, Lonely Among Us - there's a lot of real dreck in here. Enough to make you hate it. And oh, I mean hate - Code of Honor alone is enough to make you think the entire thing's worth throwing out. But if you give it a sec, and you just give it a little time, give it a few chances, you find the good stuff. The Big Goodbye's pretty darn good. 11001001 is great, actually! Coming of Age, Heart of Glory - yeah, they aren't All Good Things, but what is?"

He pops it all back together and slides it back into place with a touch more reverence this time.

"You give it a chance, and it builds up to something great if you just give it time. Season 2's got some really great stuff in it! Peak Performance, Measure of a Man, The Emissary, A Matter of Honor - it's really starting to find its feet. At first, it betrayed your trust, made you think it was all a mistake, made you doubt whether it was any good to begin with, made you think, jeez, Shatner, Kelley and Nimoy, were they the only things keeping that original show afloat? Was it all just one big mistake? But nah. It just had a little stumble."

Season 2 goes into the wall with an affectionate pat to the spine.

"It's real easy to give up on something when it turns around and disappoints you. But if you're patient, and you give it a real shot, if you give it time and you're there for it, it comes back to itself, you know? Iunno what these 'somewhat valid reasons' are, that's a little too vague for me to give you a proper answer, but I'd hope my friends and my family and everyone I care about can tell when something's me and when something's not me. Mixing my metaphors, I know, but you get what I mean, right?"

Season 3 of The Next Generation gets a loving touch. Maybe the best single Trek season of all time? Maybe!

"All I can do is be me, in the end. If that's enough, then great. If that's not enough, then I'll do my best to be better. I'd hope that counts for something. I guess I'd do my best to make amends, fix what I broke, and if that doesn't work, I guess I'd not inflict my presence on them a moment longer. I'm - pretty good at telling when I'm not wanted."

"Seriously, though, how bad can it be? You make it sound like I've killed someone, and we all know I don't have that in me."

[hlootoo]

For some reason, I can’t reblog from the original thread. (probably blocked IDK)

But anywho, I actually think it’s cool to see how different cultures depict Jesus according to their customs. At the end of the day, all that matters is that we recognize Him as real; and know what he was born, lived, died, and came back for. His appearance doesn’t factor in that all, it was just a mortal shell. Regardless of who or what you are, obsessing over it just seems silly to me.

[tamerahardy]

Adolescence / Curiosity / Moving Homes All the Time

You know the phrase “cause and effect “…how one thing can cause a reaction or for something else to happen! That’s what growing up felt like. I was very curious, a good person just also very curious…

My first kissing experience had been a girl. She was family to my next door neighbors who we had a good relationship with and she was also one of my close friends I met in the neighborhood from playing outside. Making friends back in the day was so easy all you had to was go outside and see what’s out there….funny I’m saying that as an adult because I’m actually scared to leave the house now and do that EXACT thing I use to do when I was younger.

Anywho I would go for er next door for the Halloween parties and sleep overs and we just randomly made out one night just two curious girls wanting to know. Wanting to know why it felt so good and what the fuck was “tongue kissing” lol.

Eventually my mom lost her first house in Riverdale and we moved to chamblee Tucker work was booming out there for bill collectors (my mom was a bill collector) and at the peak of her work. I finished my school year at Church st elementary and later went to chamblee Tucker middle with a different crowd of people. Normally when you go to an elementary school you make all of your friends there and you transfer over to the connecting middle school in that district. I was robbed of that experience, anyone I knew from Church St (the southside) became a distant memory and experience and I later moved on to meet new people.

Chamblee Tucker Middle 2005-2006 this was my first taste of “interracial crowds” I left the south side which was mainly black people and now I’m surrounded by mainly white people and Mexicans A NEW CROWD. Mind you this is early on in the 2000s so acknowledging the fact that their are different races was common it wasn’t a “all lives matter” type of thing it was more of clique up with “your group” type of thing and it was very out in the open. This is my first taste of middle school…I’m seeing all types of stuff overwhelming shit. Girls wearing makeup and skirts. All of these different energies and personalities. Girl groups. Popular people. Extracurricular activities. Detention. All of these things elementary school doesn’t necessarily prepare you for. My sixth grade year wasn’t too bad though. I still made new friends in my neighborhood. I had the biggest crush on this one guy who barely (you’ll begin to see a pattern with this so pay attention to my words) … but yea he lived in my apartment complex and went to my school he was an “8th grader and I was in 6th grade” lol his name was Demetrius. Demetrius Hepburn, I still remember his name like it was yesterday. You’ll be surprised at all the things you remember when you make these things and people the HIGHLIGHT of your life. He knew I was crushing on him but I don’t think he really liked me. I’m not sure why maybe I was too young and it was like having a toy (me) to play with because you knew I was interested and crushing real bad.

Outside of school most of my friends came from the apartment complex I lived in I was good at attracting personalities to me without having to do much. We played together and experienced each other as kids curious curious kids. I became best friends with Demetrius sister Deandre. We got a bit close…I’m not sure what it was but popular girls always gravitated towards me. It was like being able to unwind from being popular I guess. Me and her had a friendship and she was aware I liked her brother but I don’t think it was much she could do since he wasn’t interested in me…or at least made it appear. I was in my ugly duckling phase where I didn’t know shit about “parties” or “giving dances” but the girls I was around and Deandre did. Demetrius was more interested in that girls who were a bit more older and then there was me not very interesting at all I suppose…

As the days passed Demetrius and Deandre they ended up moving, some of the popular girls in the neighborhood moved as well and things changed a bit people weren’t really coming outside anymore. Energy shifted and as the “veterans” people were there a while moved on “my crowd” moved in. It got me thinking about this white boy name max who I would flirt with he was in my cooking class and we would flirt a lot lol. Me and Demetrius never did anything tho…I mean he came over to my crib one night when no one but my Gemini brother was there (I didn’t even know he was there in his room but he obviously didn’t give a fuck lol) but yea he wanted to hook up but we never did. lol that was the highlight of my life the guy I’m crushing on wanting to BE WITH ME am I about to lose my virginity? He’s actually giving me some ATTENTION WOAH! But it never happened lol. It didn’t feel right and I told him to leave because one of my brothers might walk in on us and he left.

Now looking back I remember fantasizing DAY AND NIGHT about this guy. Wanting to be so beautiful and perfect for him. Filling my shopping cart full of apple bottom jeans and baby phat because I wanted to be so fly at the bus stop for him, mind you my mom never bought these clothes at all so the way that shit sat in my shopping cart it sat in my imagination as well.

But yes they all moved and everything I felt I guess it just went away as life continued to happen. My aunt got a divorce and moved in with us. We later got robbed somebody broke into our apartment stole our XBOX 360s, my brothers jewelry, our TVS… I remember ealk my home from school and seeing my brother chase after a car it was like some movie type shit I get home our door is kicked in and our apartment a WRECK! Everybody in the complex saw too. My brother never caught him I wasn’t aware of what was going on or why… but later on my mom and my brother set our neighbors car on fire and my brother was sent to jail for it. We moved to a different apartment and I finished my year at chamblee. All of the people I met became a memory again. My old neighbors who car got set on fire they hated me when they saw me at school. They somehow looped me into what my mom and brother did and they HATED me. They picked on me and we were no longer friends anymore even though I didn’t do shit. Going to school became a nightmare. I ended making new friends in the new apartment complex I was in and even met someone who would become my boyfriend. He was Hispanic. Mind you it was mainly Hispanics and white people in that area. I think that’s why the grew to be envious of Hispanic and white women they were gorgeous and they wore short skirts and made themselves pretty with makeup mind you this was all a big deal in middle school and it made you appear more “cunt”… anywho I began friendship with this Hispanic guy I forgot his name I remember his face tho…me and him began dating after while but it was short lived. I ended up going to his apartment to see him and the look on his mom’s face when she saw me. She looked disgusted to see me and he looked scared to say anything back all he could was close the door. I could hear her yelling in Spanish through the door she wasn’t very happy at all. He opened the door and we walked away from that hostile environment. We later broke up because of it and he ended up dating someone of his race. I was very hurt and disappointed because I didn’t fully understand racism or interracial dating and different cultures. I didn’t care or think much of it but that experience opened my eyes to it. I grew very envious of Hispanic women. How they dressed, their hair, their eyebrows, that Salma Hayek vibe they had towards them, I grew even more envious of white women because of their fair skin they could fit in those crowds and be accepted, back then being emo or something like Avril Lavign made you cool and I hated that shit because I looked gross in skirts, my legs were fat and so was I. This was the year I paid more attention to how I looked, I was always self conscious about myself and my thighs being big but this brought it out more.

That summer my mom put me and my little brother into cheering and football, I use to cheer at Gresham when I was 5 so that’s something she always saw for me. To be apart of something why not start with gymnastics and cheer. Anywho I had been knew so nobody knew me (seems to be a thing) lol the girls were cool at first until the guys on the football team saw me and wanted to talk to me. This one particular guy they call “DEUCE” he was popular they all went to the same middle school not chamblee where I went but somewhere in that district. Anywho he liked me and wanted to get to know me and one of the girls on the team found out and from them she treated me like shit! The girls on the team picked on me, before our competition we all stayed in a hotel together and guess who became the target? Yep me. Nobody wanted to sit by me in the car on the way there and no one wanted to be around me in the hotel. I slept on the floor and the other bitches were in the bed. Thank god I didn’t fall asleep first either they would’ve played a prank on me and put something on my face while I slept. All I could hear was in the background “is she sleep…no she’s awake”.. a very uncomfortable night before our championship.

The school was year over, cheerleading during the summer had ended, my aunty had moved out and found her a place and we had moved again to the east side and yet again everything I experienced in Chamblee had all become a distant memory.

McNair middleeeee circa 2007-2008 boy was that different crowd unlike the new generation things were a bit more RAW and blunt back then. Mind you I was back on the east side so there wasn’t much diversity it was only black people and from being around a diverse my accent was a little “white washed” I was the “proper new girl” so everybody wanted to know who I was and what I was about…mind you everybody knew each other from elementary school so that made me stand out ALOT because nobody knew me and it also made me a target.

In McNair middle they segregated the halls “all girls” , “co ed” , and “all boys” … they had the hall divided up now that tells you ALOT about a school why divide us up like lab rats lol? Because that school was hood as fuck! They needed to divide everybody up accordingly to avoid disaster lol. My 7th grade year I was sent to all girls hall. It was literally only ALL girls there. You know that scene of Simba’s mom walking past all them hyena’s with her head tilted up mmmmm yea that was me except I was actually scared but I had to put my face on and just act like no one was there staring at me… All the girls including the popular girls would ask me who I was..where I come from and examine me and fill me out like I’m applying for a job or some shit. Walking through the halls transitioning through classes you would see people linking in with there familiar groups cracking jokes before class yelling in the hallways asserting their dominance that they were popular or YOU KNOW THEM, I would see boys from the all boys hall sneaking peaks on the all girls hallway trying to see they boo or just being messy curious boys, or they would just link up in gym since ALL halls were connected through gym class or PE. You know just like the movies where the hallways are a jungle you see the populars with the populars, boyfriend and girlfriends holdings hands or flirting type shit.

Outside of school I made new friends AGAIN at the new apartment complex we lived in. My grandma also stayed in that complex but at least we were close to her. This crowd was different tho these the type of complex where you see grown ass men staring at 12 year olds type shit. This where true adolescence and life experiences come to play because on the east side it’s very RAW either you about it or you not. It was like every time I moved ppl were advancing the girls were fast very fast and they were willing to do things with guys and then there’s me just observing from the sidelines seeing it all. I mean yea when I would go out and play and make friends older men looked at me and wanted to holler at me and the attention made me feel good I was 12-13 and not popular at all so anything was EVERYTHING to me even a little stare where they don’t take they eyes off you.

I made friends pretty easy in my complex “thornsberry apartments” this was my time to get acquainted so I didn’t feel left out anymore. Eveything was going well I was making friends I didn’t have a bad reputation or anything, UNTIL …. I began dating a guy that stayed in my complex lol (do you see the pattern …you still with me?)

His name was Simeon. Boy oh boy and he was very active lol. Unlike the boys I crushed on at my previous apartments he was interested in me OUTSIDE of school lol and very public with it. Me and him didn’t really talk in my school, he was in the 8th grade popular and I was 7th newbie. I was too young in eyes and being around me at school made his ego look bad but back at home he was ALL over me. Wr never fucked or anything but baby we was giving that energy like WE WAS and very openly in public. Lmaooo not this was my first boo that brought the freak out crazy ass Atlanta niggas. Anywho one day we was walking from the bus stop and he picked me up and it look really sexual you know when you jump on top of your boo while he grabbing your love handles mid air ….one of the girls that acted like she was my friend but really wasn’t saw it and It became kind of weird, other girls she was connected to she told them and they labeled me a SLUT.

The next day I went to school she was talking shit about me she wasn’t my friend anymore and she started telling people on the all girls hall. I didn’t really care much because what the fuck?? It became an issue because none of these girls really fucked with me they were just filling me out. Girls began to talk shit about me real bad calling me a hoe. Talking shit about how I dressed how I wear the same clothes every week, and then it led to the …….bullying.

[meowzfordayz]

hashira comfort you

Author’s Note: now to name this thing… 😆

hashira comfort you

Hashira x Reader

Word Count: ~1,300

CW: mild sexual content, platonic, traumatic references

Emergency Request Fulfilled: Hopefully it's alright if I request a Hashira (not separately) x reader who's just been feeling like giving up and all her efforts are worthless no matter how hard she tries. Just sumthin where the Hashira notice something is off with the Hashira!reader and make attempts to comfort her. If it's alright to ask I feel like maybe making the Hashira reader use a fork of positive emotion breathing or a breathing type of us generally positive to further suggest how something is bothering the reader- of course it's all up to you I'm totally okay if the reader is just someone being taken care of at the butterfly mansion or a relative of the leader of demon slayer (I'm so horrible with requests I apologize)

~faqs~

Decided to write this as hcs bc my brain doesn’t have the power atm to try and write a fanfic w/ 10 (9 Hashira + 1 Reader) characters 😆

Actually, Idk if my brain would ever have the power for that

I mean, sure I can manage a decent amount of supporting characters, but juggling 10 characters of equal importance ?? 😵

Anywho-

I feel like the Hashira are super in tune w/ each other, as well as totally oblivious They’re super in tune w/ each other in that they’re all phenomenal warriors, and thus have the necessary perception to quickly notice when something’s “off”

But they don’t really all know each other super well? And they don’t have time to just hang out regularly (unless they’re simultaneously slaying demons hah)

They also technically don’t all get along lmao

So if you’re feeling out of sorts, then they’d certainly pick up on your feelings, but most of them wouldn’t immediately know precisely what to do or say aka how to help you

I’m looking at you, Giyuu 😃

Okay real talk tho Giyuu’s been through a lot (they all have *sigh*)— Ik his depicted personality and trauma runs deeper than superficial emotional constipation 🥺

Assuming they all at least tolerate you, their approaches to cheering you up would differ vastly

Gyomei would do his best to convince you to meditate w/ him

“You underestimate yourself. Perhaps, reflecting on why you feel inferior may reassure you that you are, in fact, not?”

He’s wise, but is he helpful? 😬

“Himejima-san, I am grateful for your consideration, but I am unsure pondering my anxiety will relieve me of my anxiety.”

“Nonetheless, you are always welcome to sit beside me.”

Bc he’s still patient and generous ☺️

Pardon the imagery, but my first and only thought about Obanai attempting to comfort you is: he throws Kaburamura at you 😅

Hear me out!

His heart’s in the right place!

What goes around comes around, and if he was feeling low, then he’d prob appreciate having Kaburamura cuddling him

But like, the concept of asking for snake-being-thrown-at-you consent did not occur to him prior

If you’re cool w/ snakes, then Ig he’s lowkey helpful?

But if you’re not so cool w/ snakes… well… at least he’ll send you a letter via crow apologizing for his blunder (100% too embarrassed to apologize to your face)

My bias may be showing, but Mitsuri would likely be the most consciously comforting

The term comfort isn’t foreign to her, and she’s more than happy to pamper you

Whether pampering means simply listening to you, walking w/ you, cooking for + eating w/ you

She knows confidence, belonging, and meaning aren’t nurtured—founded—overnight, so she figures she can at least lessen your tangible burdens to free up space for you to heal mentally

Maybe she lays on her complimentary remarks a little too thickly to be convincing, but you know she means well 💖

Shinobu… 💀

I kNOW SHE CAN BE LOVING AND GENTLE AND AFFECTIONATE

But she kicks ass too

And if she thinks you need an ass kicking to feel like yourself again, then she’ll absolutely kick your ass

Metaphorically and literally

Like a coach who pushes you juuust far enough so that you know they believe in you, buuut they’re still demanding 50 push ups from you (bc they believe in you)

“I fear I am not enough, Kocho-san.”

“Nonsense. Let us spar.”

????? “Spar?”

“So I can prove to you that you are enough!”

As provoking and playful as Shinobu can be, she wouldn’t go easy on you, and when you inevitably are able to match her pace

Well

You’re not content (you’re pissed at being goaded into impromptu training), but you do begrudgingly concede her point

#I knew you could do 50 push ups #now do another 50

Debating between going the classic Kyojuro route, or the other route

He genuinely wishes to see you smile — to know you are well

BUT C’MON THIS MAN IS KINDA CUTE AWKWARD 😶🥰

Classic Kyojuro conjures the perfect sentence to make you feel worthy

And knows your favorite flower(s), which he obvi brings to you

Classic Kyojuro might even unexpectedly tug you into a warm, rib crushing hug, bc he can tell that grounding you could be helpful

As for awkward Kyojuro…

If you think about it afterwards, his perfect sentence doesn’t make that much sense (i.e. inspirational quotes that are more dumb than inspiring if you bother rereading ‘em), but it sounded pretty and honest and bright, so heyo — better than nothing!

And he doesn’t bring you flowers, but he does offer you the remnants of his lunch (when I write the remnants I mean potentially ¼ of a bite), bc he knows eating can be difficult when feeling sad

He’ll still hug you, but instead of warm it’s HOT

Sweaty, too tight HOT

Not boner pressed against your thigh HOT

And he’ll keep hugging you until your heart rate settles bc #that’s what a good friend does, but wHoOpS how’s it going to settle when he’s literally suffocating you ?????

I was excited to get to Sanemi, bc I’m so fricking soft for this man

And then I realized he’s the top contender for the worst (at comforting) of the Hashira

You’re despairing? How about I never look at you again and create the biggest possible rift between us in case my existence harms you further?

#the Shinazugawa bros

Disclaimer: all my “slander” toward these beloved characters is meant entirely light heartedly

That being said, I recognize the heaviness of the themes and backstories present throughout Demon Slayer, but just uhh, take my “quips” as you might take the donut jokes 🍩

I’m now looking at you, Kyojuro 😃

If Obanai throws Kaburamura at you, then Sanemi asks, scowling, “How are you?”

And then disappears w/o waiting for your response

Bc apparently a halfway greeting is better than none?

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, and a halfway greeting from Sanemi a day… keeps the blues at bay?

Muichiro wouldn’t be the greatest at comforting you either, but not for lack of effort

For some reason, all I can brainstorm rn is that he’d hand you shiny rocks?

Which, I feel, is more Inosuke-esque

But Muichiro’s a child! So like, childish methods of comforting?

A kid hands you a shiny rock — wouldn’t that make you perk up? At least a tad?

Random tangent, but I was on the beach once collecting sea glass, and these kids started copying me, and then gave me all the sea glass they found

#that was a very heartwarming day

“Tokito-san, what is this?”

“A rock.”

“Yes.”

“For you. It may be valuable. Treat yourself to lunch.”

Do you sell it and buy yourself lunch, or do you keep and cherish the rock? 😭

AHAHA WE’RE AT GIYUU

This is def out of character, but I hc that he’d just randomly grab your hand

And hold it

For 1, maybe 2, breaths?

And then let go, nod, and leave

He’s… aloof, but he does understand that: comfort doesn’t mean what is easy for you—the person doing the comforting—it means doing what could be comforting for the person requiring comfort

Is having your hand held for 1-2 secs comforting?

Debatable

But is his sentiment sweet?

Very 💙

Sooo Idk whether to include Hina, Makio, and Suma w/ Tengen… let’s hc both ?!

Hina, Makio, and Suma + Tengen = a lot of EVERYTHING

Pestering as to why you’re doubting yourself, verbal reassurance that you’re amazing, physical company to alleviate loneliness, and if you request anything specific, you will receive that specific thing x 4 😌

Just Tengen?

I imagine he’d feel affronted that I “just Tengen”-ed him

All of the above x 1

He’d likely backhandedly comfort you, bc how could he ever comfort you w/o hyping himself up too?

God of Flashiness and Festivals? Turns out he’s God of Comforting too

Self proclaimed, ofc

[imtherain]

Bucky Barnes Angst Drabble

Heyo

This is not only the first thing I have posted in over a year (other than reblogs) this is also my first drabble. I had this idea ages ago but wanted to make it story to post, but alas, I have not made it that far yet. So here it is.

Warning: Angst, minor dubcon allusions, long relationship, you were given as a “pet/plaything” to the Winter Soldier to satisfy his baser needs. It’s a drabble so there isn’t much detail on all that.

Anywho

So you were given to the Winter Soldier as a play thing/pet/toy whatever and you lived with him at hydra for ages. At first you hated him and hydra and everything but you took what he gave you cuz he was commanded and couldn't really do anything else. But eventually you started seeing the cracks in his cage and decided you liked him still. You didn't like what was happening but you liked that he was there. Maybe it's Stockholm-ish but whatever. Trauma bonded.  And he knows that every soft touch, every moan, while perhaps true enough, were still the caged bird singing and that if you were given your freedom, you'd never want to see him again. For a long time that's fine cuz he knows the both of you are never getting out alive.

But then one day you do get out and somehow you're with him in the world and it's loud and scary and you're both lost. But you're familiar to him and he is to you, so you stay together for a while. As he gets his mind back, and you perhaps get yours too, he realizes it's only a matter of time before you leave him. And one day, you're standing in the doorway with a duffle bag packed and a frown on your face and he says "don't you dare say goodbye" and so you just nod sadly and leave. And for the first time since he can remember he's actually all alone. He cries but there's no one there to know that.

Time passes and one day he sees you again. Your hair is shorter now or longer. You're smiling at someone, laughing. Oh god, has he ever heard you laugh? And he can't help but follow you, to see how you are. He doesn't dare talk to you, he doesn't deserve to and he doesn't want to disturb you. You left. Why would you want him back? But then the sun goes down and you walk home alone. You should be scared of the dark, but after all you've been through, the dark is a comfort. He follows you to your apartment, thinking he still hasn't been seen. But you spotted him ages ago. With your hand on the front door you turn towards the shadows that hide him and ask if he'd like to come in. He doesn't say anything as his form dissolves from the darkness but he follows you, as silent as the soldier you remembered from way back, into your home.

It's nice, warm. There's a lot of color. He wondered if you'd always liked color or if that was new. He thought about all the things he didn't know about you. All the things he should have asked when you were together. You give him warm tea and he holds it thinking about nights he held you for warmth. Neither of you speak for a long time. Maybe a small "how have you been?" "Good." But nothing more. You sit there looking at him and he's looking around your place. He has so many things he wants to say but no words to say them. He hadn't even told his therapist about you yet.

"You look good, Soldier," you break the silence at last. "I'm glad for that." And his eyes snap to yours. 

"I'm Bucky now," he tells you. You nod, sad smile. 

"Bucky," he can't help the way his heart aches to hear you say his name. His real name. He would give anything to hear it again. 

"And you're y/n, right?" He asks hopefully. 

"I changed it to (some other name) but yes, I'm y/n." And he nods because he understands. The silence falls again. He wants to reach out and touch you. To make sure you're real. He grips the cup until it cracks. You don't say anything while you watch the tea bleed across the counter.

"Are you happy?" Bucky asks at last. 

"Are you?" You counter. How could either of you be happy after what happened? How could you sleep alone when you'd spent so much of your life wrapped in him? How could you tell him that when he finally thawed out you were scared he wouldn't want you anymore? How you, surely, would only be a reminder of what had happened? 

How could he tell you he loved you?

So you sat in silence some more after cleaning up the tea.

The clock said midnight when he finally stood. You stood too, hopeful, but unsure what you were hoping for. He pauses as you both look at each other. 

"Do you have somewhere to stay?" You ask.

"I actually live on the other side of town," he admits. 

"Funny we ended up in the same place," you almost laugh. But your heart is aching for him too. He takes a step towards you and your eyes perk up. If you could just touch him, make sure he's alright...

"Do you have nightmares still?" He asked. You stop up short before you nod. "I do too." And for some reason that's all you needed to hear before you crossed the room and wrapped your arms around him, holding him as tightly as you did when he came back from long missions. But unlike all those times, his arms held you back and you could feel his breath in your hair and the longer you stayed like that, the more you were sure he was crying into your neck and you were crying too as you ran your fingers over his hair and shoulders and back.

"It's ok, it's ok," you shushed him. "I'm right here."  You tell him and he just holds you tighter and you're sure if he lets you go you'd both break into a million pieces.

You find yourself in bed with him, both clothed, but his hands are under your shirt. He did the same thing before, always searching for skin. You could feel him all over you as you cradled him to your chest.

When morning comes you're sure he'll be gone. That it was some sort of dream. But as the sun wakes you, he's still there, still wrapped around you as if he never wanted to let you go again. He looked so different in the morning light, soft, long lashes, plush lips. You wondered what it would be like to kiss Bucky instead of the Soldier. Your fingers trace his cheek and his eyes open slowly. When they register your face, he smiles. It was beautiful and soft and warm and it made you wonder ...

Had you ever seen him smile before?

[Masterlist]

[messedupfan]

Infinity & Beyond (Wanda Maximoff x Reader) Chapter 8

Summary: Wanda and Y/n are expecting!

A/N: its short.

Masterlist | All Chapters

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Wanda, have you been seeing someone else?”

“How could you ask me that? Of course not!” The audience laughs but you are trying to be serious.

“Then how do you explain this?!” You point to the ever growing belly. You stopped blinking because everytime you did, you swore that it got bigger. More unsolicited laughter. “Last I checked, we can’t do this between ourselves.”

“Well, y’know, you made that thing…” She trails so that you get the point without her actually saying what you did. This time a round of oo’s happens.

“I made a toy, Wanda! Not a functioning body part!” Again, they laugh and it takes a lot out of you to control your temper.

She shrugs, “Maybe you did without realizing. We don’t know the extent of our powers, love. Who knows what we’re capable of given the circumstance.”

"Look, I know that we've been talking about babies. A lot. But I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have done something like this without discussing it with you first. How are we supposed to explain this to the neighbors? What are people going to think?"

“It doesn’t matter what they think as long as we are happy, dear. Maybe we should start telling people about us. I doubt anyone will be unsupportive.” She looks at you with those big green eyes and your heart melts at the thought of a baby that the two of you somehow created might have her eyes or her nose and they will carry some of your features as well.

“I’m going to call a doctor to get you checked out, we can worry about the rest of the world later.” You peck her lips and move to the home phone. In no time at all the doctor is there and you are sitting next to Wanda, holding her hand as the doctor uses his stethoscope on her baby bump. He makes a sexist remark about using fruit as an estimated measurement of the baby to make it simple for ladies like you and Wanda. He asks to speak to the father so that there would be someone that understood him. You and Wanda comically exchange a look before you feed him a lie.“Uh he’s at work, can’t be bothered. Anywho, I’ll walk you out.”

You wave at your neighbor as he trims his bushes. Herb greets you back and then seems to freeze, effectively slicing into the brick wall in front of him. You decide to ignore it and head back inside to check on your wife. A grin spreads across your face as you realize that Wanda was your wife and the two of you were expecting a child that you somehow created together. All of which seemed impossible years ago. Even now, it all still seems a little impossible and yet… As you walk in, you plan to discuss the odd encounter with Wanda but the second she turns around all you can focus on is the size of her belly. Something was definitely wrong. “Wanda! How in the world are you more pregnant?”

She frowns, confused, and you point until she looks. Her eyes widened in surprise, “Oh my! We better get started on that nursery.” The two of you walk into the spare bedroom, you with a book about what to expect and her with a bowl of fruit. Wanda has fun as she uses her abilities to decorate the room meanwhile you stress over the text in the book. At some point, she says that she feels a fluttery sensation and you hurry over to her side.

“How can the baby be kicking already?” You panic. “At this rate they could be here…hmm.” You scowl at the ground as you try to come up with a nearly accurate estimate.

Wanda rolls her eyes, “He’s going to get here before you figure it out, love.”

“I don’t know, it could be the end of the week or the end of the day. I have no idea anymore. Everything has been so random since we moved to this town! It’s almost like none of this is real!” You start coughing aggressively after your outburst. You look down at your hand to find it covered in some sort of black liquid. “Wanda? What’s happening?” A blinding pain shoots through your entire body that causes you to scream out and collapse to the floor. Wanda squeezes her eyes shut and holds her hands out as her magic flies out rapidly, reversing everything back to the moment before you fell over.

Wanda rolls her eyes, “He’s going to get here before you figure it out.”

You smirk, “You think we’re having a boy?” You place your hand lovingly on her belly and Wanda nods with a hint of sadness in her eyes. “I don’t know when he’ll arrive, all I know is that we’ll be ready no matter what.” You kiss her with as much love as you have to offer but when you try to pull away she isn’t ready to let go. “Everything okay?” You ask with a frown when she finally releases you.

Wanda nods with a twitchy smile, “Yeah. Just nervous about being a mother.”

“Don’t be, you’re going to be amazing.”

Before either of you could have predicted, Wanda’s water had broken and you were dashing over to the doctor's house hoping to catch him before he was off to his vacation. You try to return home as fast as possible but unfortunately you miss the birth of your child. Luckily, Wanda wasn’t alone, she had the help of Geraldine. The doctor is a little light headed when he walks into the house and Geraldine assists him to the kitchen to give the small family some privacy. “I guess there is something to that mothers intuition. Do you want to say hi to your son?” Wanda holds the baby up to you from her lying position on the floor.

You carefully hold the baby in your arms, “Hi Tommy, I’m your other mommy.” Wanda is pleased to hear that you chose to agree with the name she had picked out and you wink at her. Suddenly, she lets out another blood curdling scream and you look at her with concern. You lift up her dress and find another head crowning. “Oh gosh, there’s another one!”

“Billy!” She shouts as she pushes. You call out for help as you catch the baby that was coming out of your wife.

“Ten fingers and ten toes! Two healthy baby boys!” The doctor declares.

“Here, let me walk you out doc.” You offer after you settle the baby you were holding into the single bassinet. He makes sure that it’s just walking and you share a laugh with the audience as you leave Wanda and Geraldine alone. The doctor makes a strange comment about not being able to escape small towns and then Agnes and Herb act strange as well. None of it mattered to you. Inside the home were two baby boys that you and Wanda somehow created together. All you were concerned about was being able to hold them in your arms again.

You walk back into the house to find Wanda alone with the babies. You ask her what happened to Geraldine. "Oh she left honey, had to rush home." Wanda turns around and gasps, turning away at the sight of you. Out of confusion and curiosity, you touch your face to feel if something was on it. Black fluid covers your fingers when you pull them away. This time you let out a gasp but in a blink everything returns to normal. You and Wanda hold the babies and settle in on the sofa to spend the rest of the evening in front of the TV.

Chapter 9

Taglist: @idiotegirl @evenbeingcrazy1998 @liver-casserole @franfineashell @yeetus-thyself @olsensnpm @brokeandconfuse @when-wolves-howl @cristin-rjd @i1ovewanda @obsessed-with-wandamaximoff @itscryptic @drpepperobsessed @alwaysgoodnight @diaryoflife

[wackybuddiemewbs]

WIP Wednesday Buddie Edition

So yeah... I'm still at it, apparently. Even though I know shit about bombs or whatever else and base this solely off of quick internet research. So yeah, those grenades are clearly plot devices for the bombshell that is that those two be gay for each other. Anywho, hope you enjoy the angst! Cheers!

Working title: Reenact My Pain of Losing You

Basic idea: When the 118 is summoned to a field with actual trenches and not at all real soldiers of a world war, everyone is in for a bad surprise when the play turns dead serious. And it’s not just time that’s ticking for Buck and Eddie.

Find out more here: Part 1, Part 2

“Alright, everyone! Gather around!” Greg announces as he makes his way back into the tent. All are at their feet at an instant. Because no matter what, this promises a way to stop walking circles, running circles inside their heads at all the things that may happen.

“The drone just landed. We got a pretty good visual of the situation. One of my men is prepping up as we speak to extract the unconscious civilian. He is nowhere near the explosives, thankfully. So if we move fast, both will make it out of the danger zone without further interference,” Greg begins.

“Lucky bastard,” Eddie mutters under his breath.

He knows he shouldn’t think like this. That guy doesn’t deserve to die because he made some shitty choices or likes to pretend to be in a war. Deep down, Eddie knows all this. And on any other day, he would know how to show proper sympathy for people ending up in tough situations because of some wrong choices. Because they didn’t have the intention for anyone to get hurt. He knows all this. And any other day, he’d know how to show it.

But he can’t. Tonight he can’t. Because tonight it’s Buck who may have to pay the price for their mistake. So Eddie can’t bring himself to it yet, to feel sympathy. He cuts it short, right above the chest. He will put it in its place once this is over, but not tonight. Just not tonight.

“It’s lucky for all of us. Given his condition, he may move in unexpected ways and cause an explosion by accident,” Greg reasons. “So long we move with caution to get him, removing the civilian from the trench will be the least of our troubles, the sooner the better.”

“But what of Buck?” Eddie asks hoarsely.

“That’s the most of our troubles, sadly,” Greg sighs, brushing thumb and index finger over the corners of his mouth. “There is at least ten explosives within close proximity. If any of them detonate, his chances of survival are little to none. Concussion grenades do not compare to fragmentation grenades of the same period when it comes to blast effect, but if you’re right on top of them… things still look grim.”

“Somehow, you make it sound like that’s not even the worst news yet,” Chim ponders, his nerves getting more frayed with every second passing, despite his best efforts. “And I don’t like that. So please, tell me I’m shit at reading a room… or a tent and that this is indeed the worst of it.”

“No, you’re sadly reading the tent correctly. The worst news are yet to come,” Greg confirms, which has Chim visibly cringe. And Eddie finds himself wincing as well. This can’t be any good.

Maybe walking circles was not the almost bad after all.

“So here it goes: We were informed that M15 were used. M15 grenades from that period had a huge downfall when it came to safety measures. To ignite them, you have to pull on a string at the base of the stick. It can easily catch on debris or clutter and thus ignite the fuse by accident. Soldiers had them exploding on their belts unawares during the war. Which is why they were eventually replaced by a model without that string.”

“But that guy got the faulty ones.” Hen’s grimace is tight. Her eyes are betraying any composure she might exude otherwise.

“Yes,” Greg agrees. “Right now, we cannot rule out that Buck at least partially pulled on some of the strings when he landed on the box. It may be that some are fully pulled back but didn’t ignite because they are too old. There is no way for us to properly determine that without moving him.”

“And thus move the cords,” Bobby guesses.

“So if Buck moves off of them, they may blow up and he goes up in flames,” Eddie mutters, finding himself short of breath. “That’s what you’re saying.”

Buck may die, that’s what he’s saying.

Buck may die while they try to save him, that’s what he’s saying.

Buck may die. Buck may die. Buck may die…

“That is what we’re trying to prevent, but that’s the biggest concern right now, yes,” Greg agrees, trying to stick to the facts for what it seems. “Buck is lying on top of them. His shoulder, side, and hip are certainly touching a grenade.”

“So you can’t remove or secure these without Buck moving,” Bobby concludes.

“There’s still a chance they won’t explode at all. When my men go in to gather the civilian, we will see how many we can safely remove. Whatever can lessen the impact of an explosion, we will do. Plus, maybe the examination is going to give us some ideas about how to proceed,” Greg sighs. “I wished I had better news, guys, but we have to take the situation for what it is. Sugarcoating it won’t help you, and it certainly won’t help him.”

Eddie huffs. “Shit.”

“Yeah, it is,” Greg sighs, offering a sympathetic look. “Alright, I’m going to see about the extraction of the civilian now. We need to reduce as many risk factors as we possibly can.”

“Keep us posted,” Bobby answers tightly. “And let us know if we can help in any way.”

“Will do.” With that, he and his team set to work.

Eddie finds it somewhat surreal, watching things proceed. He stands there by the tent and watches as the EOD moves in. He is watching a perfectly carried out operation. They move effectively and with utmost care. He can see that. He is watching them extract Larry from the trench. He can see his head emerge, and then the rest of him, banged up but alive.

And yet again, there are those things he knows he should feel but doesn’t. Relief, for instance. Normally, he’d be relieved to see this injured man emerge, to be brought to safety, to receive the help he needs. Deserves.

Because that’s a life saved.

Because that’s the job, the job he loves, the job he chose and feels like he was chosen for.

But he can’t feel it, not tonight.

Because here they are, people who are dedicated to saving lives, and they are standing by as they pull one out. And it isn’t Buck.

Yes, it is surreal. It is surreal because it is real.

It is real that they are just standing there, waiting, unable to move, unable to help.

It is real that they can’t do their job, that they can’t do it for Buck.

Eddie is grateful that Hen is taking care of Larry once he is out of the danger zone. He doesn’t know if he could keep his cool, talking to him. He’s been there before, what feels like a small eternity ago. But if that guy came about and started talking shit like the other war enthusiast did, Eddie can’t rule out he may have done something he’s sure to regret. So yes, he’ll have to thank Hen for this later on.

Because he can’t do it.

Because Buck may be blow to bits and pieces, torn apart and burned to ash in the air.

Because they wanted a big explosion, the grand finale for their little game before the final curtain draws.

Because he wanted his evening to conclude with Buck next to him on his couch, having beers and talks and little big nothings that only pass between them.

It’s because of Buck. It’s because it’s Buck. That’s why. That’s the only reason why.

“Hey.”

Eddie turns his head to see Chimney walking up to him. “Hey.”

“Just wanted to let you know that Larry is banged up alright, but he’ll be fine.”

“Thanks,” Eddie says, nodding his head tightly. “Did you manage to get a hold of Maddie yet?”

“No,” Chim sighs. “She’ll only know once she comes back home to get her phone, I guess. And trust me, I wished there was another way to deliver the news.”

“Yeah, I get that.”

“But I can’t leave.”

“No.” He pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Look, I just… I get it that you may feel like that right now, but it’s not your fault and it’s not Buck’s. That was just some bad luck.”

“I know,” Eddie sighs. “I just can’t help going back over this.”

“Yeah, I get that feeling. Doesn’t get you anywhere, though,” Chimney sighs.

Walking circles yet again, isn’t it?

“You mean when Maddie ran away to Boston,” Eddie mutters.

“Yeah. I obsessed over all the things I may have done wrong. What I should have done differently. The signs I missed… On that matter, Buck was right. I was spiraling. And that didn’t help, her or me.”

“Yeah, that kind of seems to be the motto of the evening. The things we can’t do to help people we care about,” Eddie huffs. “Look, I know there are things beyond our control. I know that. And I know this is such a situation.”

“But you wanna control it. You wanna gain the upper hand,” Chimney agrees.

Eddie lost control too many times throughout his life, even though he’s always been so desperate to keep it. He has since dug through some of that with Frank, learns to understand that this is true. That there are things beyond their control, and that this is okay.

But this is not okay. It just isn’t.

The rational part of Eddie long since accepted that there are things they can’t change. The rational part would likely say the same thing if it was someone else of the team down there and he had to calm someone down. But his partner is down there and he can’t help him. His best friend is down there and he can’t be with him. And it’s tearing him apart by the seams.

“Yeah, you wanna win but you can’t,” Eddie sighs. “It’s just...”

Chimney offers a sad smile. “It’s Buck.”

“Yeah, it’s Buck,” Eddie swallows thickly.

It’s always Buck.

“Eds?”

Eddie nearly jumps at the sound. He fumbles for his radio hurriedly. “H, hey, Buck, what’s the matter?”

“Am I right to assume that the EOD taking so long is not a good sign?” Buck asks, still trying to sound casual, though he is anything but that. “Or are they just shit at their job and having a tea party without me?”

“We’re all working on it,” Eddie assures him. “So is the EOD.”

“No doubt about it,” Buck answers, then adds quieter, “Just needing someone to be honest with me, man. So, ugh… How bad is it?”

“You’ll be fine,” Eddie answers automatically.

“… O-kay… That means I have my answer,” Buck grunts. “I’m fucked.”

“No, you’re not,” Eddie insists, licking his lips nervously.

“Eddie, that’s how we talk to people we know won’t pull through.”

“No, it’s not,” Eddie insists. “You’re not listening to me. We’re gonna get you out.”

“As I said, no doubt,” Buck sighs, his voice trailing off. “I just wonder in how many pieces.”

“Would you stop talking like that, please?” Eddie retorts, screwing his eyes shut. He regrets it the moment the words slip out of his mouth, but he just can’t take anyone joking about it. Not even Buck.

“I get to make all the jokes about this. No one else does. I’m not at all cozy on a bunch of grenades, and my bladder is about to explode before these might. Jokes are my lifeline right now. So don’t blow this for me before those motherfuckers can.”

Eddie touches his forehead with his free hand. “Right, it’s just…”

“I’m sorry,” Buck interjects. “I shouldn’t be snapping.”

“You get to snap. You get to snap and joke however much you want, actually.” Eddie closes his eyes. “But I wasn’t joking. We’re gonna get you out.”

“Okay.” Buck’s voice is almost not audible this time, and Eddie doesn’t know what to make of it. Is Buck just giving in so not to upset him? Or are they both cashing in on that lie now?

Eddie’s eyes shift to Bobby approaching. He gestures at him, and Eddie understands.

“Buck, I gotta talk to Bobby, okay?” Eddie says, eyes fixed on their captain. “We’ll talk again in a bit. Hang in there.”

“Not much left to do. Unless I piss on the grenades first.”

Eddie forces a crooked smile with the comment, “Try to think of the Sahara or some other dry place.”

“But that makes me thirsty!”

“Just hang in there,” Eddie mutters. “Please.”

“… Okay.”

“Okay.” Eddie switches the radio back off. He glances at Bobby. “What’s the news?”

“It’s looking even worse, actually. The grenades they secured can still detonate, which means the ones Buck’s on might as well. The cord is rather brittle, so it may well be that even slightest movements may make them snap to ignite the fuse.”

“Shit,” Chimney curses under his breath.

Eddie swallows thickly. “So, so… what do we do now?”

What is the plan? What mad rescue are they about to pull? There has to be something, right? They freed people out of molten chocolate before. They can do this, right? They have to.

I have to.

“The EOD still try to figure out what’s the best approach,” Bobby replies somberly. “The biggest issues is apparently the unpredictability of the malfunctions. With more modern bombs, they’d have a clearer idea of what to do. But like this, it’s really fishing in muddy waters.”

That is certainly not the answer Eddie was waiting for. Then again, was he really expecting Bobby to swing by and tell them that all is good and that the bombs wouldn’t ever blow up? Like they ever get that lucky.

Wishful thinking much, huh?

“If someone pulls him out very fast…,” Eddie bargains, he knows he is bargaining.

Bobby shakes his head. “Not happening.”

“We can’t just leave him down there,” Eddie whispers, his eyes drifting back to the trench.

“And we won’t. Ever,” Bobby resolves. “So you get back on the radio with him and keep him preoccupied, okay? This will likely take some more time.”

Eddie blinks. “Preoccupied?”

“He needs someone to talk to him. He may panic, even though he’s been trained not to,” Bobby reasons. “We got the rest under control, so you should sit down and talk to him.”

“But I…,” Eddie mutters, suddenly at a loss.

“You know whom he wants to talk to right now,” Bobby argues. “And it isn’t Greg.”

Eddie nods his head silently. No, it isn’t Greg. It’s him. It has to be him.

Bobby walks over to give his shoulder a firm squeeze. “You got this.”

“Yeah.”

Bobby nods at Chimney. “Chim? Let’s see if Greg can use our help.”

Chimney nods, offering another sympathetic look to Eddie before he follows Bobby.

Heaving a sigh, Eddie takes the radio back into hand. He feels the familiar weight, though strangely, it feels heavier in his hand than it usually does.

“Okay, back to bug you, Buck,” he says, forcing a smile. “So if dry places don’t do the trick, how about lakes?”

“You’re pure evil, I hope you know that,” Buck whines.

“You bragged about knowing the list of all bigger lakes in North and South America by heart, just last week,” Eddie argues, putting on his most casual tone. “I think now might be the time to catch up on that bold claim you made.”

“It’s not bragging if you just state the facts.”

“So if I look it up on Wikipedia right now, you’ll name me the top ten for each continent?” Eddie challenges.

It’s silly, but it’s the best thing Eddie can come up with at the moment. If that is a lifeline for Buck, he will gladly keep it up.

“You really wanna get me to piss myself, don’t you?” Buck grunts.

“No, just figuring out whether that means you get to study with Christopher for his next geography test. I heard they are doing lakes and rivers next, and I don’t have the nerve for it,” Eddie answers.

“I thought you only suck at math.”

Eddie can’t help but grin at that. “You suck at math.”

“Well, then get your phone out and let’s try, man.”

“Alright.”

Eddie keeps forcing a smile as he quizzes Buck on lakes, daring to hope that his voice will not betray him as much as his face likely does. Because if Buck was with there with him, he could tell at once that Eddie is pretending. Even though he told him not at all that long ago that he doesn’t have to pretend with him.

But this time, this is not about me pretending to be fine for my own sake. So hopefully, this doesn’t count.

But apparently, that’s the only way he can have his back right now, even if it is just with a whimsical distraction. Because deep down, both know it’s no more than that. And perhaps that’s the worst of it, the fact that they know it’s only just an act.

Yet, they keep playing this game together.

Because what else is there left to do for us?

[damn-daemon]

I risk suffering a lot of hate (so anon it is), bit I feel bad for Alicent. Everyone despises her, but she was not some cunning bitch who married the king because she wanted to be queen. Her father used his teenage daughter as a pawn. And he was the one who planted the idea that Aegon being king was important for their survival. People seem to forget how patriarchal Westeros is. We love Rhaenyra’s girlbossing her way through life, but that is an anachronism in Westeros. Alicent is way more representative of a woman’s life in that society. And that’s why she resents this situation so much. Rhaenyra is a princess who can do whatever she wants, with a loving father and an acquiescent husband, but Alicent is in a vulnerable position, in which her only choice is play by the rules and be used by her father as means to an end. And it baffles me how everyone is so unsympathetic towards Alicent, but turns a blind eye to all the unsavory things Daemon does. And the way she grew bitter over time makes so much sense. There is no justice for Alicent: she did what was expected of her, she pleased her father and then her husband by having sons, she sacrificed her needs and wishes; for what? Alicent is a woman in Westeros, and for the people at that world, she doesn’t matter. All she could hope for is that playing by the rules would secure her survival, and the survival of her children. And, in her head, Rhaenyra being queen is a threat to that. The Dance of Dragons was devastating, but we can’t see it in black and white. Both sides were convinced they were in the right, and they have a point in their own point of view. If we see things through a modern lense, Rhaenyra is obviously right, but Westeros doesn’t reflect modern society. If we try and see things as the characters would, Alicent isn’t so unreasonable.

Well, that's a novel for sure. And yes, I see part two. I will address that one separately. Ngl though, not sure why you felt the need to send the ask to me. I haven't been overtly hateful to Alicent (that my goldfish mind can recall) but eh. I'll address it. Maybe you just wanted the words out there idk. I'm not you.

Anywho, first I just want to say that viewing Alicent from the point of view of their society versus ours, she would actually look worse than we see her now. Both because we as the audience know she was used by her father and we have seen her private vulnerability. More than likely, most people of Westeros probably think she was a cunning snake that slid into the king's bed. So, if anything, we are actually getting the more sympathetic viewpoint of Alicent. Not meant as an insult to her. Just food for thought.

Second, I mean, yeah, Alicent is sympathetic. I'm not going to deny that. She was dealt an utterly shit hand in life, and was basically isolated by and from everyone she ever cared for. I am 100% Team Blacks for my own reasons, but I'm not going to say she's an evil, horrible villain out to destroy the world. She was a desperate, scared, vulnerable girl who grew into a paranoid yet spiteful woman because of the environment she was thrown into. It doesn't make her a bad person. Just a product of her environment. Seeing Rhaenyra do what she never had the chance to have is no doubt a knife in the heart, and the only real outlet she had to speak to are Criston Cole, who has a seething hatred for Rhaenyra, and Larys Strong, who is manipulating her for his own gains. Even free of her father, she wasn't free of being compelled by outside forces to become the person she is.

I guess, for me personally, I certainly can't speak for others, my sympathy for her begins to run dry over her tendency to be a hypocrite as well as her pushing her hatred onto her children. I'm not saying Rhaenyra is perfect, far from it, but I don't think she tries to paint herself as anything other than who she is. Also the whole making Rhaenyra go to her after having a kid was a dick move I wouldn't wish on anyone.

Also, I just love Daemon because he isn't sympathetic. I don't think anything he does is justified. I'm not here to defend anything he does. Sometimes you just like to watch a character burn the world to the ground. Other characters, you hold them to a different standard. My reaction to watching Jaime Lannister do horrible things would be completely different from my reaction to Robb Stark doing them. Different characters, different viewpoints, different standards.

Point is, I personally am not saying Alicent isn't sympathetic, but I'm just not a fan of her, I guess? Idk you sent me a novel and I gave one back haha.

[honeypiehotchner]

Looking Too Closely (Bucky x Stark!Fem!Reader) — part two

I’m backkk so sorry this took forever, my idiot/goblin brain wanted to hold onto this part for longer?? Anywho

Summary: The one in which you meet Bucky Barnes for the first time. Also the one in which you want to ram Tony Stark’s skull into the wall.

Warnings: angst, mentions of past violence, mentions of death, Tony is still pretty douchey (I know y’all don’t wanna hear this but he is a giant asshole 99% of the time)

Series Masterlist

You can’t sleep.

It doesn’t help that you haven’t had a real bed to sleep in — let alone one that has memory foam or whatever the hell that is on this mattress — for some time now. But the Tower is too quiet.

You can’t open your window and Tony must have the place basically sound-proofed because you can’t hear any of the city sounds that you’re used to. The late night traffic, the sirens, the footsteps, the voices, the fights, the snoring. You’re alone in here and it’s eating you alive.

You’re still wearing Wanda’s clothes. Pepper said she’d let you pick out some clothes today and they could be delivered. She offered to go shopping somewhere with you, but you don’t want anything fancy. You’ve never even been to a mall, not to shop, so that idea alone felt too much.

Grabbing a pillow from the bed, you move to the floor in front of the window. Laying on your stomach, you rest your elbows on the pillow, staring out at the city lights.

After some time, you give in and lay your head down, hoping it’ll bring sleep around. Luckily for you, it does.

Unluckily for you, sleeping on your stomach on the hard floor has your ribs feeling properly bruised by the time the sun rises. You roll over onto your back, letting your shoulder blades take the weight for the next couple hours.

By the time late morning rolls around, you open your eyes, feeling exhausted. Restless sleep is the only kind of sleep you know.

Dragging yourself off the floor, you head to the bathroom to brush your teeth. You’re not used to having one, but you’ll gladly use the toothbrush here. That’s one thing you missed more than the others while you were homeless.

You exit the bathroom and head out into the hall, down to the living area and kitchen. It’s quiet, so you figure everyone is gone or out.

You’re busy climbing on the counter to look in the top cabinet when you hear footsteps on the hall, but they’re sort of far away, or they sound muffled like they’re a distance away. You halt your movements for good measure of listening, and you definitely feel like someone is down the hall.

But, your stomach growls, so you go back to rummaging through the cabinet.

The person you sensed steps around the corner into the kitchen and freezes. He has no idea who you are, but you’re standing on top of the counter, and that’s when he realizes you’re standing on top of the counter.

This is around the same moment that you vaguely sense the same presence from the hall behind you, and you jump when you see someone is actually standing there.

He is next to the counter in a split second, holding his Vibranium arm out in case you fall. “What the hell are you doing?”

“Trying to get cereal, what the fuck does it look like?”

“It looked like you were about to fall on your ass.”

“Lucky me, I didn’t,” you snort, resisting the urge to kick his face. He’s at the perfect height for you to do it, too. “Who the hell are you?”

“Bucky,” he answers. “Who the hell are you?” He fires back.

“Y/N,” you reply, turning to go back to looking in the cabinet. It’s mostly random things, nothing you particularly care to eat. “Do you know where everyone is?”

Bucky leans back against the opposite counter, arms crossed over his chest. “Probably asleep. We just got back an hour ago.”

You hum. Right, Tony said a few of them were out. “Then why aren’t you sleeping?”

“Don’t want to mess up my schedule.”

“Hm.” You smell bullshit.

“What?”

“Nothing,” you huff, closing the cabinet and hopping down. “Nice to meet you.”

“You too.”

As you’re making your way toward the hall, you’re stopped by Tony’s voice.

“Munchkin. Get back here. You and I have some things to discuss.”

You spin around. “What now?”

“What now is right,” Tony deadpans. “Come on. My office. And Barnes, go the fuck to sleep for once.”

Bucky snorts, flipping Tony off, but only you saw it. You grinned, mouthing thank you.

Bucky smiled boyishly in return.

+++

Tony conveniently waits until his office door has shut before he starts in on the questions.

“When did your mother pass away?”

“A month ago,” you reply slowly, really too exhausted to deal with this or Tony right now. “Why are you asking that?”

“Because I wanted to see if you’d continue to lie to me, and you have.”

“What are you talking about?” You gathered that he was a pain in the ass, but delusional, too? Jesus.

“She didn’t pass away a month ago. Her funeral was a month ago.”

“Okay? And? What the hell does it matter?”

“The funeral was delayed because the police think you killed her.”

Fuck. He found out. “Well I didn’t.”

Tony looks ready to scream at you. “So you knew there was a warrant out for your arrest?”

“Well, yes, but—” This time Tony does cut you off by a million cuss words, but you continue over top of him. “I thought they gave up!”

“You knew they were looking for you and you walked in here instead. I should turn you in right now. In fact, I don’t know why I haven’t called the police yet.” He’s waving his arms wildly, no doubt trying to control his anger at the absurdity of this situation.

You cross your arms over your chest. “They have no proof.”

“Clearly they have something or there wouldn’t be a warrant.”

“They don’t have shit, Tony. I wasn’t even near my house when it went up in flames, alright? I was a mile away.”

“Where? Where were you?”

“At a gas station.”

“What were you doing there?”

“Are you interrogating me?” Is he recording this? Your eyes search briefly for cameras before you remember he’s a tech genius, so his cameras are probably hidden.

“I’m just trying to get to the bottom of why you have a warrant and why you decided to waltz in here. Do you know how much trouble this could get me in?”

“I’m sure you could pay your way out of it.”

“Hey,” he snaps his fingers at you, “I’m being serious.”

“Me too,” you snap your fingers back at him, too fed up with him to care, “Mr. Billionaire.”

The two of you stare at one another, unblinking, unflinching, anger seeping through your skin. Tony has realized quickly that no matter how hard he pushes your buttons, you’ll push his right back, just as much if not more.

Maybe you are his.

“I’ll ask one more time,” Tony starts. “Did you start that fire?”

“I was too busy getting stabbed to start a fucking fire, okay?”

This has Tony reeling in shock instead of anger. “Stabbed? Are you fucking nuts? What do you mean you were getting stabbed?”

“I mean I was getting stabbed. What else do you think that means?”

Tony sighs tiredly, frustration making him clench his jaw. “Where?”

You gesture to your abdomen. “Just in a couple places.”

Tony’s eyes widen. “A couple— Alright, you know what, we can finish this later, because right now,” he points his index finger at you, “you need to get to MedBay.”

“What?”

“Yeah, that’s the thing about getting stabbed, munchkin. It can cause internal damage. And if you never went to the hospital—”

“I stitched myself up, it was fine—”

“Uh-uh, shut it,” he snaps. “Come on. Come with me.”

+++

You run into Bucky once again when you get off the elevator at MedBay. He’s talking with Steve who is checking on Natasha who is a little bruised, and all three of their heads turn when they see you dragging your feet behind Tony.

Bucky gives you a questioning look while Steve and Natasha look plain confused, both having not met you until now.

“FRIDAY,” Tony calls out. “I need a full body scan on Y/N.”

“Yes, Mr. Stark.”

You roll your eyes as Tony gestures you into a room. You can still see everyone through the glass walls as you step on a small circle in the floor, presuming it’s where you need to stand for the scan.

Steve asks the million dollar question. “What’s going on?”

“Got stabbed,” you reply with a shrug, making Tony’s blood boil even faster.

Natasha snorts at your nonchalance, Steve gives Tony a baffled look, but Bucky seems weirdly concerned. “You what?”

“It was a long time ago,” you tell Bucky.

“No, it was a few months ago. And she never went to a hospital,” Tony adds, right as FRIDAY finishes the scan. “What have we got FRIDAY?”

“Evidence of internal bleeding that has since stopped, but nothing else. Everything has healed properly.”

“Well thank god for that,” Tony deadpans.

You nearly flip him off right there, but you settle on a glare. “Are you done?”

“Yes,” Tony says. “But we’re not done.”

“For fuck’s sake, I did not start the fire!”

“Oh no, I believe you there,” Tony says. “I wanna know who stabbed you.”

“Some random idiots,” you shrug, walking out of the room and past Tony, back toward Steve, Natasha, and Bucky. “Leave me the hell alone about it. Goddamn.”

Tony lets you walk this time, watching you storm off toward the elevator. Meanwhile, he has two super soldiers and a spy staring at him like they just found out his darkest secret.

“So...that’s Y/N,” Natasha comments. “She’s got fire.”

“She’s also got an attitude,” Tony retorts.

“It’s just like yours,” Steve fires back, raising an eyebrow.

Tony ignores him.

“Here’s my question,” Natasha says. “If she was stabbed that many times in that many places— How did it heal? That’s not normal.” And when Tony gives her a confused look, she adds, “You know what I mean.”

“Wait,” Steve catches on. “You don’t think she’s…” He looks over at Bucky.

“She knew I was standing behind the wall earlier,” Bucky says, a realization crossing his face. “She could sense me. I heard her, but I was too far away for any normal person to hear me.”

“Okay, let’s not jump to these conclusions right now,” Tony interjects. “It’s bad enough she has an arrest warrant and a habit of getting stabbed. I don’t need to worry about her being like you two knuckleheads.”

“It’s still worth looking into,” Natasha comments.

“Yeah,” Steve agrees. “We need to know if she is, Tony.”

“Well right now, she’s being a hormonal teenager, so I don’t think I’ll be able to ask her about it,” Tony deadpans.

“She just lost her mom,” Bucky says, remembering when Steve told him, and his heart broke for you. “Give her a break.”

“If you want to talk to her Barnes, go right ahead.”

“I might,” Bucky retorts, already heading toward the exit so he can find where you went. “Just to apologize for your attitude.”

+++

It takes Bucky a full ten minutes of searching for you before he remembers he can just ask FRIDAY.

“She’s currently in her room, James, but it is on Do Not Disturb.”

“Can you override that for me?” Bucky asks the AI.

“One moment.”

Bucky has no idea why FRIDAY needs a moment, but he waits. He’s in the living area so your room is just down the hall, but knocking does no good when Do Not Disturb is live. He knows because he uses it every night. No sound gets in or out.

“Do Not Disturb overridden by Tony Stark.”

Bucky rolls his eyes. Of course.

He heads down the hall to knock on your door, but you don’t respond. Because of the circumstances, Bucky goes against his better judgement and opens your door.

He’s met with a pillow hitting his chest.

“Oh,” you say immediately after. Bucky is surprised to find you sitting on the floor in front of the window, facing the city skies with a blanket over your shoulders. “Sorry. FRIDAY said Tony overrode it so I thought it was him.”

“Nope, just me,” Bucky replies, holding out his hands. He reaches down and grabs the pillow, tossing it back on your bed. “What are you doing down there?”

“Looking,” you shrug, turning back around to face the city.

“Can I join you?”

“Sure.”

Bucky shuts the door. “FRIDAY, put Do Not Disturb back up please.”

“Of course, James. Do Not Disturb is now active.”

“It’s really weird,” you say. “Having an AI in this place. Doesn’t it creep you out?”

Bucky lets out a laugh when he kneels to the floor to sit a little distance away from you, putting his back to the window. “There’s a lot of tech I don’t understand. I kinda had to get used to it quick when I was in Wakanda, though, so nothing phases me anymore.”

“Right, you were...gone for a while,” you pause, not knowing how to approach the subject. “You and Steve both were, right?”

He nods. “Steve was frozen, I was brainwashed.”

He says it so bluntly that you don’t know how to respond at all.

“I’m not anymore,” Bucky continues. “But I did a lot that I’m not proud of. And I was framed for something I didn’t do.”

You half-hum, half-scoff at that. “So you know what it’s like.”

Bucky nods, leaning his head back against the window. “I do.”

“Who were you brainwashed by again?”

“HYDRA,” Bucky replies, tensing a little. “Why?”

“Just curious,” you shrug. “The name sounds familiar, though.”

Bucky lifts his head from the window. “How familiar?”

You shake your head, unsure. “I dunno. It was all over the news, though, right? That’s probably why.”

“Yeah, probably,” Bucky replies slowly. “Can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.” You bring your knees up to your chest, hugging them.

“Do you know why you were stabbed?”

You don’t move a single muscle. You don’t even blink.

“Tony was an asshole,” Bucky says. “He shouldn’t force you to talk about something that recent.”

“Yeah.”

“But if you do ever wanna talk about it,” Bucky pauses, “I’m here. No pressure, though. I get it.”

You nod slowly, watching him from your peripheral vision. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Just not right now,” you continue, surprising yourself and Bucky. “Maybe later.”

“Whenever you want,” he shrugs. “I’ll give you some space, though. Do you uh...want your pillow back?”

You perk up a little. “Yeah, thanks. If you don’t mind.”

Bucky pushes himself to his feet, walking over to the bed to grab your pillow. He tosses it back to you gently.

You smile softly and hug it to your chest, but Bucky knows that once he leaves, you’ll lay down and sleep, right there in front of the window. Because your bed must be too soft.

He gets it. His is, too.