#anyways. feeling a specific good mood coming on today
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longing4yesterday · 13 days ago
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i've been stoking in my own negativity lately so i'm gonna try my best to keep positive today <3 it's been a real struggle w/ my mental health lately but every step forward is a good one. anxiety be damned i have friends that care about me! and i'm writing gay rpf!! we're doing good!! in any case, i'm sharing a hug with you all if you need it <33 love you all
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phagodyke · 4 months ago
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ughhhh
#mood rocketing downhill. thjs can only end well :-(#on my period and so tired and sad and lonely and i really really really want a hug im going to bash my head in with a rock#and a bit annoyed i spent ages testing climbing shoes today which ive been meaning to do for ages and the staff were rly nice#and i got a pair in the end but tbh i may end up returning them bc on reflection im not sure theyll work for my specific climbing style#what i rly wanted was a few sizes down of my current ones but they didnt have stock. and i tried the size i wanted in a variation of the#same shoe ie. same shape just not the rubber im after and they fit near perfectly so now im just thinking abt them instead.#u know what fuck it. ill take the train to my old city tmr and go to the climbing store there bc i checked online n they do have them.#ill just be constantly doubting my decision if i dont and i need to do smth nice for myself. and i can read on the train#and if they dont fit better well i have these other ones. and these ones are still nice! but im worried theyre more suited to sport/trad#and im primarily a boulderer... and i mean theyd def be good for some types of bouldering and i wanna get into sport/trad anyway but arghhh#whatever. fuck it. booked my train its not that expensive anyway just time. im tired of letting my decision paralysis get to me#and always settling for shit that makes me unhappy bc its not quite what i want but i talk myself into pretending im okay with it#when im not!!! and its unfair to myself and everyone around me to so consistently fail to identify n communicate my actual wants/needs#this isnt actually abt the shoes im upset for other reasons but at least projecting it onto this gives me a semblance of control#and gives me an easy way out of having to confront n deal with my avoidance...... it literally has no fucking limits huh.#well whatever. i need to food shop and eat and shower and then its okay ill play a videogame and go to bed early#its not been that bad a day i watched a movie this morning which was nice. and it was nice to cycle around the weathers great#probably havent slept enough. probably took my afternoon meds too late. probably just feeling lonely and tired and on my period....#tomorrow will be a nice day and monday i have climbing and there are other nice things coming up. puts down my head bashing rock#okay feeling a bit better now ive cried a bit and typed this. deep breath. wheres my shopping list.#.diaries#.vent#byeee
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ennabear · 5 months ago
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hi ennabearrrr...im back at it again...poppin in your inbox with a request for more loser!abby fluff if u want! 💙 i need her to be all blushy and squishy and i literally want to just EAT HER WHOLEKELFKTO love your writing soso much, it brightens up my day every time!
ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ HIIII SWEET PLUTOBEAR!!!!! i love having you in my inbox don’t worry 🫶 i’ll build you a comfortable little nest so you can enjoy your stay and come back sometime... HEHE ANYWAYS making fun of this fucking loser again but she’s actually just me in another universe… nsfw at the end but i swear it’s cute!!! 18+
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can’t stop thinking specifically about loser!abby falling asleep in front of you for the first time when she comes back from patrol completely wiped out. the trudge back to her room feels like it’s never ending, her whole body is sore and aching but she’d rather pass out in bed than on these concrete stairs. you’re sitting in her bed waiting for her— sheets freshly washed and pillows fluffed— when she clambers through the door. she doesn’t see you at first, yelping and almost falling backward when she realizes there’s another person in her bed.
“abby, it’s me.” you laugh, staring at her panting and hunched over form.
“jesus fuck, never do that again.” she sighs, holding her face in her hands.
you beckon her closer, opening your arms to make room for her. she flops right down on top of you, completely crushing you as her muscles relax. “how was patrol?” you prompt.
“mmmh, it wasn’t great.” she groans. “we almost lost a guy because he got shot in the leg. he was losing so much blood, saying shit like ‘tell my family i love them’ and it kinda freaked me out, you know how i am.”
“he’s gonna be okay though?”
“yeah. at least i think so. i just pray that never happens to me.”
“it won’t.” you assure her. “i love you too much to let it happen. plus, i wanna see what you look like with gray hair and wrinkles.”
she giggles softly into your neck, wrapping an arm around you and settling down. before long, her gentle breath turns into soft snores, and her soft snores turn into her sounding like a fucking chainsaw with a puddle of drool dripping down your neck.
you laugh again at your loser of a girlfriend, letting her exhausted cacophony of snores lull you to sleep like some sort of evil white noise. this was the first time in a while you fell asleep with such a smile on your face.
or… loser!abby oversharing to you while she’s drunk. you’ve never questioned why she was so sentimental about certain things, like how she could remember how and when she got every coin in her collection, but would never let you touch them. as soon as she got some alcohol in her system, she felt like it was impossible to shut up. (although she frequently felt that way, sober or not.)
it didn’t really cross your mind that she’d lost someone so close to her. sure, you’d lost your own family and friends a few times. the world is cruel but we adjust, we learn to grow around the grief, changing into bigger and better versions of ourselves. that’s what abby was good at.
she was so sweet, so confident, sometimes even a little bit of a badass although she’s a true dork at heart. so when you hear the story of her fathers passing, the brutality of it absolutely wrecks your heart. the fact that she was in the building when it happened, letting the mysterious murderer escape right under her nose, leaving her with a giant hole in her heart that could never be filled.
“i’m sorry…” she giggles through her waterfall of tears. “we were supposed to have fun tonight and i killed the mood. again.” you frown at your girlfriend, pulling her in for a tight hug and letting her sniffle into your shoulder. yeah, it’s true, she did technically ruin the mood. but how could you be mad at your baby? at least you know her better now, and she’d probably find another way to ruin the mood if not this one.
on a happier note, walking in on loser!abby masturbating... she’s actually had a great day today, and she wants nothing more than to be pleasured by her girlfriend to end it. she just doesn’t know how to ask for it. after giving you a quick parting kiss in the cafeteria, she showered and returned to bed, deciding to finally do something about the ache in between her legs. should she go get you? what if she just rubs one out really quick and then forgets about it? should she wait until you get back?
fuck it, she decides, and she’s instantly shoving two fingers into her weeping hole. the stretch is easy, she’s used to it by now. she whimpers as her fingertips graze her g-spot, reaching up to tug at one of her nipples. “abby?”
“oh, jesus!” she gasps, clamping her hand over her mouth as her cheeks redden. “you have got to stop doing that!”
“having fun?” you tease, watching as her blush spreads from her cheeks to her ears. “yeah… well, no actually.” she sputters. giggling, you climb on top of her and tug your shirt off, then lean forward to place a sweet kiss on her nose bump. “would you like some help?”
as soon as you get her approval, your lips are suckling onto her clit with two of your own fingers pumping in and out of her. she’s breathing incoherent praises like “gah, fuck! oh- it- i’m !!!” as you slide in and out of her, pausing repeatedly to lick up some of the slick that’s dripping down your hand.
once she tips over the edge, you rub her thighs in encouragement, mouth too occupied sucking up all of her cum to praise her verbally. when you pull away, she’s staring up at you with doe eyes. her lips, cheeks, nose— fuck, her whole face— looking more kissable than ever.
“i’m sorry.” she sighs once you have her wrapped up in a warm blanket, guiding her head to rest on your chest.
“for what?”
she ponders this for a second. she’s so used to apologizing for embarrassing herself that she forgot you’ll love her no matter what, even if it’s as awkward as walking in on her with her hands down her pants. “uhh, actually, i dunno anymore.” she smiles. “i love you though.”
you crane your neck down to kiss each of her eyelids as they flutter shut for the night. “i love you too, silly.”
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glorysbox · 1 year ago
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bihan x afab!reader (no pronouns used)
wc: 1.1k
warnings: explicitly 18+, bihan is mean, slight mention of power imbalance, slightly possessive bihan, coming inside, brief breeding mention at the end
Your Grandmaster is stressed.
It’s evident in the way his hips snap into your own, his cock buried in the warmth of your sex. Evident in the way he has little regard for your feelings or your own pleasure—clearly displayed in the cruel way he fucks into you and the punishingly cold grip that he has on your body. It stings—the icy feeling of his fingertips dug into the flesh of your hips.
“You belong under me,” his voice is low and even, nearly drowned out by the obscenely wet sounds that have you clenching tightly around him. “Be glad that you have this opportunity.”
You don’t respond. It’s not like you can, anyway—your face is buried into the mat of the floor, lips bitten as you desperately try to prevent any moans that Bi-han forces out of you. Your wetness pools around the base of his cock, sticky strings breaking with each pull out of you and reforming with each brutal push inside of you. It dribbles down, down your thighs, staining the mat under the both of you. Messy enough to be clinging to his balls and painting his thighs. Had you not been turned away from him—face down and ass up—you’d be able to notice the way he’s struggling to hold back the noises that threaten to escape his throat. You’d be able to see the way he bites his lip; see the way that his eyebrows are so tightly drawn together and see the way his cheeks are painted a rosy shade of pink. There’s a reason why he only fucks you from behind.
You are glad, though. It’s beyond you why Bi-han has taken such a liking to specifically you—despite being Lin Kuei, you perform significantly worse than your peers and struggle to keep up with the intensive training that you’re all forced to endure every day. It’s clear that he only keeps you around for one reason. Stress relief.
There’s a part of him that secretly relishes in the way you’re so much weaker than he is.
Bi-han doesn’t ever touch you. Doesn’t truly ever lay claim to your body through possessive touches as much as you secretly would like—but you don’t complain. You never complain. The fact that your Grandmaster comes to you of all people to relieve his stress is enough—and you do your best to help him. You really do. It’s not shown on his face, evident in his words or displayed in his actions, but Bi-han does truly enjoy how easily you bend to his will. He finds himself reveling in how easily controlled you are—and you don’t mind. You never do. It’s okay for him to use you… he is your Grandmaster, after all.
Cold fingers snake their way up your body, resting on your back��dipping in the center to push you further towards the ground. You shudder. Bi-han, for once, decides to not be (so) rough with you. This time, he won’t bury your face into the mat and grip your hair and force you to take the brutal pace of his cock until you’re cumming all over him. He’s in a good mood today.
Bi-han takes advantage of the way he’s forced you to arch under him, his cock drilling into you faster and a tad bit harder than before—the loud noises of your arousal probably audible to anyone who’d walk by the room. You can’t help but whine at this. It’s unintentional. Something that you can’t hold back… usually, you’re better at keeping yourself quiet. Bi-han likes it when you’re quiet. That’s what you thought, at least.
“Who’s your Grandmaster?” Bi-han’s hand grips your hair, pulling you back and forcing your neck to crane. He’s not feeling so benevolent anymore. His pace increases, his cock pumping inside of you harshly enough to the point where you can’t help but moan. He makes an effort to tilt his hips ever so slightly—the blunt tip of his cock rubbing alongside the spots he knows makes you cream around him. For someone that claims to only care for his own pleasure… he knows your body very, very well. Your walls flutter and clench around his cock, hands clawing at the mat below you as his grip in your hair tightens. His tone is gravelly—low—and you find a strong feeling of need throbbing in your lower body at the sound of his voice. “Say it. Don’t disappoint me.”
You could never dream of it.
“B—Bi-han…” Your voice comes out as a long, drawn out whine. You’re usually more mindful of your volume—but the feeling of him pressing into you like this, so relentlessly—you can’t help it. Hands gripping the mat to steady yourself, there’s nothing to stop the sounds that you make from escaping. You try to bite your lip—but he just presses deeper into you. Making you whine more. Your body trembles under him—legs shaking—as he draws back to plunge further into you especially roughly.
Bi-han is starting to find that he doesn’t mind listening to the sound of you moaning under him like this.
“You belong to me,” he reiterates, his hand moving from your hair towards the junction of your legs. Cool fingertips make their way towards the bud in between your legs—two of his fingers rubbing your clit in soft circles, a stark contrast to the punishing pace that he’s set for you. “No other man can have you like this. Say it.”
“Y—yours,” your words come out in babbles, barely intelligible as you struggle—squirming and writhing under him as he toys with your clit and drills inside of you. “Yours—I’m—”
The feeling is too much. His cold fingers ghosting along your clit—the other hand gripping your hips harshly enough to leave bruises. It doesn’t take a long time for your squirming to become borderline uncontrollable; matching the way your walls flutter and tighten around him like a vice and matching the way your cream and arousal stain his cock. Bi-han fucks you through it. He always does—more focused on finishing himself than having any regard for you—his hips stuttering at the feeling of you creaming around him and his grip on your hip tightening even more.
He stuffs his cock inside of you, burying himself to the hilt—leaving no space between the both of you. You can feel his seed leaking inside of you—it’s warm, and hot, and unfamiliar.
“You’ll give me a son.” He tells you, voice akin to a demand as his grip on your hips keeps you in place.
Who are you to deny your Grandmaster?
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cloudyskydreams · 4 months ago
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hey!! i see youve been posting about the sanses a bunch and i was wondering if you could write some cuddling headcanons? im mostly here for UF Sans but u can write for all 3 of them too if you prefer :o] whatever you want really
Hi thanks so much for requesting! I absolutely can do that for you I loved writing these so much, Red is absolutely one of my favorites he's sm fun to write I did end up doing all three cause why not ::3 Anyways I hope you enjoy!!
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UNDERFELL: Red
•Red is a clinger he loves touching you in any form and capacity and cuddling means he can press your bodies as close together as he wants.
•He's can big or little spoon both works for him. When he is big spoon he likes curling up around you holding you to his chest. It's reassuring, but ohhh when you hold his head to your chest and gently rub his skull and wrap yourself around him? He melts he loves being the little spoon it makes him feel safe and loved.
•He runs warm so I hope you're ready for some heated cuddles. He likes to run his hands up your sides and trace little pictures into your skin and his hand is always nice and warm when he does.
•Red gets a bit touchy while cuddling but that's part of the experience, he won't do it if you're uncomfortable with it too. Just squeezing your soft bits or more teasing touches if you seem into it. He doesn't even do it in a lewd way at first he just likes touching you but then his thoughts catch up with his actions.
•Sleep cuddler all the way, he loves being close to you in his sleep and him seeing you by his side when he wakes up from nightmares always helps calm him down.
•PURRING, I am obsessed with them being able to purr this man specifically. Imagine falling asleep with him in your arms while you can feel the vibrations of his purr on your chest. Be proud he feels safe and loved enough to be able to do that!
Small drabble because why not:
Today was not a good day for Red, everything that could go wrong seemed to and it had left him on edge waiting for the next awful thing to happen. You being the dutiful partner as always noticed his mood change 5 minutes into him coming home and called him over to the couch.
"What's wrong baby?" You ask gently looking at the skeleton in front of you. His shoulders are tense and he's looking at the ground his usual smile strained.
"nothing ta worry your pretty lil head over doll, jus a bad day." He grumbles out and you frown. You reach over and gently take his arm he looks up from the floor to stare at you in confusion as you gently pull him forward. He follows your lead and eventually the skeleton is sitting on your lap as you wrap your arms around him. His shoulders drop from their scrunched place and he looks into your eyes as if searching for something. After a second he seems satisfied and lowers his head to your shoulder resting it in the crook of your neck.
"It's okay," you say softly as you trace his spine through his jacket, he sighs contently and nuzzles into your neck cuddling close you"This will pass, it's just a bad day and it will come to an end and tomorrow we'll do better " you continue to reassure him as you rock him gently back and forth. You make no comment on your shoulder wettening or his hold on you tightening and simply hold your bonefriend close, hoping to be a comforting rock for him in tough times like these.
Undertale: Sans
•He likes to cuddle has no preference on little or big spoon besides little spoon requires less work and he likes that. He likes to hold and be held so it depends on whatever mood you're in.
•His cuddles are almost always sleepy and even if you aren't he's feeling nice and relaxed enough he'll probably be passed out within ten minutes.
•One of his favorite positions is him on his back and you resting your head on his ribcage, he'll run his hands through your hair or trace small hearts and doodles on your back.
•Likes to use your squishy bits as pillows especially your legs, he'll wrap his arms around your thighs and burry his face there and be out like a light within the next few minutes.
Underswap: Blue
•Blue likes big spoon the best because it makes him feel bigger and like he's protecting you. He doesn't hate little spoon though and actually one of his favorite places to be in general is pressed into your chest.
•Another big purrer, his purr is loud and proud and he does it often when around you, especially while cuddling because he feels so safe and content.
•For videos where he doesn't have to show his face he likes having you sitting in his lap with his arms caging you in as he plays. He likes having you close to him while he works and plus a little extra motivation of having your partner in smooching distance for when you beat a hard boss is always nice. He likes having you sit like this for multiplayer games too.
•When cuddling he'll get the random urge to bite you and normally follows through with it by nibbling on your neck as he pins you down either with his body on top of you or arms wrapped around your waist. He attributes it to a form of cuteness aggression and being around you that close sets it off in him.
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julilovesyou444 · 2 years ago
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ok first of all your writing is so good i’m literally in love????? anyways, could i request a tom x reader fluff with them cuddling but like tom doesn’t rly know how to do it bc he’s used to hook ups and stuff and so it’s diff for him?? i feel like that’s super specific but i think i wld be so cuteee idkk. anyways tysm pookie 💗💗💗
show me how ~ tom kaulitz
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AHHHH thank you love!! you are so sweet💟 I’ll try!!! thank you for requesting, this is my first time doing one of these so I’ll do my best!! if you have a request, feel free to do it in the little thingy on my page, this was so fun !! ALSO, if this isn’t what you were expecting or anything, I’ll write it again differently, no problem ☺️
background ~ you and your boyfriend had just started dating not long ago, and there were a lot of things in the relationship that were new to him. he hadn’t been in many relationships at all, so he isn’t sure on everything, for example, cuddling and affection. you show him how :)
warnings ~ none, just fluff and cutesy stuff, tad bit of angst too
I’m Montenegrin so please forgive me if my English is messed up !
~
you had been at home all day, just picking up and relaxing. it was a pretty chill day though. you’re boyfriend, Tom, was at the studio all day. At first it was just a couple days of the week for a few hours, but lately it had been everyday for the whole day. You could tell it was taking a toll on him. He was tired and more irritable. You knew it wasn’t his fault, and you honestly felt really bad for him. When he would come home, he wouldn’t want anyone to bother him. After dating Tom for a week or two, you came to realize he was not an affectionate person. You thought that he just needed to warm up to you, but it had been almost a month. Besides kissing and sex, he rarely touched you. You couldn’t figure out what was wrong, so you tried to ignore it for the main part.
today was another long day for him. you weren’t living together yet, but he just slept over at your place all the time. you had made dinner for him tonight, not something you always did but you wanted to be nice. you were sitting on your bed, scrolling through random websites on your laptop when you heard the front door open and shut. Tom didn’t call out to you like he usually did. You knew today probably sucked for him. The fear of him rejecting you as he sometimes did made it hard for you to leave your room, but you did anyways.
You walked down the hallway to main room of the apartment to see Tom sitting on the couch, watching tv. He looked angry. The dinner you made him still sat on the table, untouched, and probably cold now.
“I made you dinner.”, you spoke softly. His eyes darted from the screen to yours. Tom looked so upset, almost as if he wanted to cry.
“I know. Thanks, but I’m not hungry.”, he replied coldly.
You took a step closer to him, almost testing the waters.
“How was the studio?”
“Shit. It was shit. Do I need to pause this or…?”, he replied rather harshly, referring to the television.
“Tom…”, you trailed off, very quiet. He saw the hurt in your eyes and immediately hated himself for taking his anger out on you. He grabbed the remote and turned off the t.v.
“I’m sorry, I’m just in a bad mood. I’m really stressed and tired and I don’t know how to get rid of it, but I shouldn’t take it out on you.”, Tom said, sounding genuine as ever.
“come here.”, you said, putting your hand out for him to take. You could tell he was very hesitant, but he took your hand and let you pull him up from the couch.
before he could argue or protest, you pulled him into a hug. you usually didn’t hug, but it felt like he needed it. You wrapped your arms tightly around his torso and pushed the side of your face into his chest. At first, his arms were just outwards, unsure of where to go. When he became more aware and comfortable, and put his arms around your neck, hands on the side of your head as he placed his head on top on yours. you could feel him relax into the hug, and it made you so happy that you were finally able to do that for him.
“I’m sorry for being rude, today was just so so bad, and these long ass days are tiring me out.”, Tom said, his voice muffled into your head. He left a soft kiss on the crown of your head.
“I know, and I’m sorry. Let me help.”, you pulled away, looking up at him.
“Help how?”
“Y’know, help you relax and stuff. Make you feel better.”
“I’m not really in the mood to fuc-“
“No, Tom, not that. Like just get into pajamas and I’ll rub your back and cuddle you, yea?”
“Uhh-“
“Please, trust me, you’ll feel so much better.”
Maybe it was your pleading eyes, or the fact that he secretly wanted to be intimate with you in this sense, but it didn’t take a lot for him to give in.
“Okay.”
“Yea?”, you beamed. He couldn’t help but smile back before playfully rolling his eyes.
“Yea.”
“Okay, go get changed into something comfier.”
He nodded and grabbed some of his clothes from your room before heading to the bathroom.
You quickly went into your room and started trying to “set the mood”. You dimmed the lights as much as possible and lit a few candles. You grabbed a bunch of really soft blankets and some water too. You wanted him to feel comfortable around you. He wasn’t affectionate or that touchy with you, and you wanted him to be.
Tom walked into your room, looking around, admiring your dedication.
“Lay down.”, you instructed.
“So bossy.”, he jokingly muttered.
He laid down on your bed as you walked over.
“Lay on your stomach.”
He groaned but turned over onto his stomach.
You climbed up onto the bed, and then put one of your legs over him so you were straddling his lower back.
“what are you-“
“shhh just relax.”
your hands found their way under his shirt, making their way up to his upperback. You began to slowly massage circles into his back, feeling him instantly become less tense under you. You gradually added pressure in places that felt a little more stiff. You began to knead the knots out of his back too. There were a lot. No wonder the poor boy was so upset, his stress was causing him to get strained.
You went on massaging him for a bit more, and you could tell how calm he was getting.
you climbed off of his back and laid on your side next to him, facing him. His face was towards you and his eyes were shut, but you could tell he wasn’t asleep just yet.
“did you like that?”, you said softly. he opened his eyes narrowly and nodded.
“yes, thank you. you don’t even know how much I needed that. I’m so tired now.”, he murmured.
you opened up your arms. Tom watched you intently.
“c’mere”
“for what?”
“pleaseee don’t fight me on this one. I just wanna hold you.”
“what, like cuddling?”, he questioned, looking doubtful.
“yea… is that okay?”
“um… yea, yea it is. its just that… fuck, this is embarrassing.”, he rubbed his eyes, trying to hide his uneasiness.
“listen, all of the girls I’ve been with before, I never really did anything like that with them. usually we would just hook up and they would leave. what im trying to say I guess, is that I don’t really know how to cuddle or anything like that. I sound so stupid. its kinda just like hugging, right?”, he rambled.
at first, you couldn’t even say anything because you could believe that your beautiful, beautiful boyfriend had never been shown love and affection like that before. he so clearly deserved it, even though he had his moods, he was the sweetest thing. You felt bad for him. That was probably why he hadn’t shown or done anything like that for you before.
“I’ll show you how.”, you responded with a small but sweet smile. his eyes sorta lit up and he picked up his head from the pillow.
“show me how?”
“mhm, c’mere. don’t make me wait any longer, im tired too y’know.”, you teased him a little. Tom scoffed before scooting over to you, waiting for your instructions.
“put your head against my chest, under mine.”
he listened to you, putting the side of his face against your chest. You took his arm and wrapped it around your waist, and he quickly got the memo and snuck his other arm beneath you so that they were both wrapped around you. He pulled you closer, forcing you to smile. you entangled your legs with his.
you two were finally cuddling. you had wanted to for so long, but you didn’t know how to ask. you could feel Tom’s slow breath blow out against you as he got closer to falling asleep.
“thank you, baby.”, he sleepily mumbled.
“of course. I’m sorry your day wasn’t great.”
“it’s definitely better now. I wish we would’ve done this earlier.”
“I thought you didn’t really want me to touch you, or for you to touch me, in this way, I guess…”
“I’m sorry, I wanted to but it was just unfamiliar to me and that kind of scared me, I didn’t want to do anything wrong and I’m not used to this kind of affection.”
“I’m sorry, Tom.”, you said, gently stroking his hair. he breathed deeply, showing you how relaxed he was becoming.
“it’s okay, I have you now.”
You continued to play with his hair as he cuddled you, and you could tell just how peaceful he was. He ended up falling asleep pretty fast. You were so happy that he was able to unwind and open up with you. You reached over to the candle and blew it out. You flipped the light switch off and let yourself fall asleep in Tom’s arms.
~
a/n ~ awww this is very sweet to me😭 I love doing these cutesy little stories, they are my favorite to write. I’m in my home country right now so I’m sorry if my posts are very inconsistent or posted at a weird time, thank you for the request!! all of the comments are so sweet too, and they make me feel a lot less insecure about my writing. have a good day !!!💋😽
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thewritingrowlet · 8 months ago
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The Outing Trip pt. 2, ft. tripleS Xinyu and Dahyun
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tags: cheating, cum-in-mouth, creampie, ass play, (a bit) rough
word count: ~10k words
author's note: I was 3k words deep into this shit when I realized that I didn't have any picture of them together so here's their pictures from the GND showcase. In terms of plot, I initially wanted Dahyun to have a bigger role but then I decided that I'd give her the spotlight in a future part instead.
Anyway, thanks always for reading <3
p.s. Wolfie if you see this again; send me another idea on June 12th (oddly specific, I know). Thanks in advance. <3
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[🐈‍⬛| 08:02]
Oppa
Don’t forget
We have a meeting with everyone today at 1545
Don’t forget to bring Xinyu with you
“Xinyu-yah”, you call out to Xinyu, who’s busy getting dressed in the bedroom, “Nakyoung just reminded me of today’s meeting”. Xinyu gets out from the bedroom after she’s done changing, “yeah, she just texted me as well. You don’t have classes today, do you, oppa?”. You get up from the sofa and shake your head, “I’ll take you to campus, baby. I’ll refuel the car after dropping you off”. She shoves you in the chest and you’re sat back down on the sofa, “it’s like 8, let’s chill for now”. Xinyu then sits on your lap and tucks her head against your neck, “I always like how you make me feel small even though I’m taller than most people”. You chuckle and peck the top of her head, “you can thank my dad for his genes, precious”. She squeals at the pet name, “aww, that’s a new one, isn’t it?”. “Not really”, you say, “I said it last Monday when I was lulling you to nap—remember when you were resting your head on my lap? You probably already drifted away to dreamland when I said that, though”. “Oppa, I want to take a little nap like this until it’s time to leave, okay?”, Xinyu says as she steals a peck on the neck from you.
After a few minutes of seated cuddling/napping, it’s now 10 minutes before Xinyu needs to leave for class. You want to make sure that she’s in the correct state of mind before you take her to campus, so you attempt to wake the napping fox. “Honey”, you say as you give her some taps on the back, “we need to leave soon”. She looks around her as she gathers her consciousness, “huh? Already?”. “Yes, already. Now let’s wake up and get ready, okay?”, you pepper her face with kisses to help her wake up. She holds your head to make you stop, “give me a reason why I should go to class and give up the chance to be spoiled by my boyfriend all day long—it better be a very good and rational one, oppa”. You crank the gears in your head to come up with an answer for your clingy sweetheart, but you only manage to come up with the most dull and basic answer of all time: “your education is important, love—what would people say when they hear that the vice president refuses to go to class because she wants to stay at home with her boyfriend?”. She huffs in false annoyance, “I don’t care about what people say, oppa. The world is ours and they’re merely leasing in it”. “C’mon, let’s not say such thing, love. I’ll carry you to the car, okay?”, you lift her by her thighs and stand up from the sofa.
-
You’re now in the car, on your way to campus to drop Xinyu off before getting fuel for your car. You notice that she hasn’t made any sound since you two left the parking lot, so you look at her and see that she’s asleep again. You suspect that she’s not feeling too well and not in the best mood, so you decide to make a quick detour to get some ice cream for her—thankfully she doesn’t wake up when you’re in the drive-thru because that’ll spoil the surprise.
“Cutie pie”, you softly tap Xinyu in the arm, “we’re here”. “I’m not feeling too well, oppa. I’m having a period right now and it’s not pleasant”, she says with a weak voice. The tone and manner of her speech makes your heart ache because Xinyu is never one to act like this. “Honey, look at me, please”, you grab a cup of ice cream and show it to her, “I have some ice cream for you. I hope this helps”. She smiles despite the discomfort and takes the ice cream from your hand, “thank you so much, oppa. Your kindness keeps reminding me of why I fell in love with you”. You pull her to you and peck her lips, “I love you, baby. Please hang on until the end of the day, okay?”. She says her farewell before getting out of the car with ice cream in hand, and you wait until she disappears from your sight before driving away.
-
Xinyu greets you in front of the classroom where the meeting is taking place but instead of leading you in, she pulls you around the corner instead. She pulls you into her embrace and hugs you tightly. “Thank you so much for the ice cream, oppa. I’m so sorry for being annoying all the time”, she says. You peck the top of her head in response; “you’re not annoying, baby. How can I say that you’re annoying when I don’t know exactly what you were going through? It’s not fair for you”. She lets go of the hug and wipes her glassy eyes; “you’re gonna make me cry if we keep hugging. Thank you, oppa, seriously”. You take her hand and walk into the classroom with her to get ready for the meeting.
“Hey, look who’s here with me”, Nakyoung says when she sees you two enter—Yooyeon is sitting on her left while Dahyun and Chaeyeon are on her right. “Unnie, hi”, Xinyu waves at her. “Hey, guys”, Yooyeon replies with small waves of her own. “Are you going to be with us for the meeting, Yooyeon-ah?”, you ask her. “I was about to ask if I can, actually. Nakyoung-ie told me to ask for your permission”, she says. You shrug, “I don’t mind having a spectator. We’re getting food after as well so it’s easier like this”. You walk to the four girls and give Dahyun and Chaeyeon a fist bump, “welcome to the council, you two. Run for presidency when you can, okay?”. “Thank you, oppa. We won’t disappoint”, Dahyun says.
-
Nakyoung told you a few days ago that she wanted to run this meeting, so you take a seat among the 30-something person crowd and let the spokesperson cook. “Alright everyone”, Nakyoung starts as she stands in front of the class, “I’ll be the one speaking today, since Jisung-oppa is having a sore throat today. Let’s get started, shall we?”. Xinyu leans over and whispers to you, “your throat is sore, oppa? Must’ve been the ice cream”. You chuckle and shake your head, “no, it’s not; she made that up”.
Nakyoung kicks off the meeting by explaining the when and where of the trip; 3 days 2 night from September 29th until October 1st on the island across the strait. She then continues by explaining the method of transportation to get there, which is by bus, which will get on a ferry to cross the water before getting off and continuing the ride until you arrive at the resort. Lastly, she announces that each room will be occupied by 3 people and that everyone is allowed to choose who they want to share the room with, as long as they’re of the same gender. She skips the “who” part of the 5W1H because it’s obvious already; who else is participating if not the members and leaders of the council? Nakyoung takes a sip of water and catches her breath before answering a bunch of questions from people in the room. After answering all of them, she sees that no one else raises a hand, so she ends the meeting and tells them to send her an email should they have questions.
Only the 6 of you remain the classroom after everyone else has scattered to continue their day. “Good job, Nakyoung-ah. You did well”, you praise her. She pulls Xinyu to her feet and hugs her, “aaaah, I’m so tireeeed. Is this how it’s always like for you, oppa?”. You chuckle as you get up from your seat, “kind of. You get used to it, though”. Yooyeon chimes in and tells her perspective, “I haven’t got used to it even though we’ve had a bunch of meetings already. Being in the center of attention overwhelms me”. You offer a hand for Dahyun and Chaeyeon to help them up. “Let’s go get dinner, girls. It’s on me, just like usual”, you say as you lead them to the door.
-
“Does anyone have any idea where we should go?”, you ask the crowd in your car. “Dahyun-ie’s restaurant! I want burgers, oppaaaa”, Nakyoung raises her hand and exclaims. “Any objections?”, you ask once again but get no answer. “Alright, Dahyun-ie’s restaurant it is”, you say. You glance at the rearview mirror and see that Dahyun is covering her cheeks, presumably to hide her blush. You look forwards again and keep driving until you get to your destination.
-
“Alright, girls; we’re here”, you look around the car and see that everyone was asleep—no wonder the ride was super quiet. Everyone but Xinyu gradually wakes up after hearing your announcement, as they reach for their stuff and slowly get out of the car. You get out of the car and sprint to the other side to help Xinyu get out. “Please carry me, oppa”, she says. You’re concerned if maybe she’s in pain, “are you okay, baby? Does your body ache?”. “I’m okay, just feeling extra clingy today”, she says with a teasing smile. You repay her smile with one of sweetness before giving her a piggyback ride to the restaurant.
“Mom, I’m bringing my friends again!”, Dahyun greets her mom as your group enters the restaurant. “Omo! Welcome back, children”, Mrs. Seo waves to you and your friends, “what’s wrong with the miss on your back, Jisung-ah?”. “She’s having a period so she’s not feeling so well right now. Xinyu-yah, say hi to Mrs. Seo”, Xinyu waves cutely after hearing your words. Mrs. Seo puts her hands on her chest, “and you’re carrying her like that? Oh, how cute and nice you are”. You deflect her words and line up in front of the cashier with the girls to order. After everyone has finished ordering, you pay for everything (without forgetting the extra) and head to your group’s favorite spot near the wall.
-
Everyone but Xinyu has now completed their meal, so the 5 of you stay seated and wait for her—Dahyun’s mom gave Xinyu an extra serving of fries, so combine that with the fact that she’s not feeling well, it takes her longer to finish her food. Since you’re sitting next to Xinyu, you’re able to offer comfort her and encourage her to keep eating. Chaeyeon praises you for being a good boyfriend to Xinyu and that you and Xinyu are really meant to be together. You thank Chaeyeon for the kind words and pray that you’ll get to spend the rest of your life with Xinyu, because there’s no one else that you love more than her.
You see Dahyun get up from her seat and stand next to Xinyu before whispering something to her ear. Xinyu replies to whatever Dahyun just said with a nod, so Dahyun walks up to you and whisper in your ear. “Oppa, my parents want to talk to you. Follow me, please”, Dahyun says. You give her a nod and follow her to some office space tucked away in the back of the restaurant.
Once you enter, you see that the room she has led you into is actually empty. “Where are your parents, Dahyun-ah?”, you ask her as you look around the room. “Oh, they’ll be here soon”, Dahyun says as she approaches you, “I told them to join us when I tell them to. I want some private time with you first”. You look at her in confusion, and that’s when she pulls you down by your nape and kiss you. Dahyun breaks the kiss after a minute and rests her head on your chest. “What was that, Seo Dahyun?”, you ask her. You don’t hear any answer from her, but you do hear some sobs. “I love you, oppa, but I know I have no chance against Xinyu-unnie. There’s no way that you’ll leave her for me, is there?”, she says after a sniffle. “Dahyun-ah”, you say as you wrap your arms around her slender torso, “what are you saying right now? What does Xinyu have to do with anything?”. Noticing that you’re hugging her, Dahyun rids of any thoughts that’s holding her back and hugs you. “I just wish that you were mine, oppa, but we both know that it’s highly unlikely to happen”, she confesses.
You take a deep breath before pulling away from the hug. “Please don’t cry; I hate seeing girls cry”, you say as you wipe the tears on her cheek, “can we get your parents after this? The sooner we can get this out of the way, the better”. “I lied”, she confesses, “I just wanted to have some private time with you”. You can’t believe your ears; “excuse me?”, you question her. “I lied to you and Xinyu-unnie—is she always that gullible, by the way?”, she says. “Yes, she is”, you admit and sigh, “I’m getting out of here. The last thing I want today is breaking Xinyu’s heart by lying to her”. She grabs your wrist as you start walking away, “can I at least tempt you with a blowjob?”. “No, I get that a lot from Xinyu already”, you say, resolute and clear—not sure why you need to flex your sex life to Dahyun, though.
You return to the dining area and see that Xinyu has eaten all her food. You get on a knee next to her so that you gauge how she’s feeling based on her expressions. “Good job finishing them, baby. How are you feeling right now?”. Nakyoung answers your question for Xinyu, “she said she wants to go home soon, oppa”. “You do, sweetie?”, you ask Xinyu, and she replies with a nod. You get back on your feet and look at the crowd, “are we ready to go?”. “Just leave, don’t worry about us”, Yooyeon says, “go, take Xinyu home. I’ve been in her shoes before, and I wished I had had a boyfriend like you at the time”.
-
You carry her out of the car as soon as you arrive at your building and hustle straight to the bedroom. “Let’s lie down for a second, okay? I’ll get you some water and clothes”, you say to her after setting her down in bed. “No!”, she blurts out, “just-just be in bed with me, oppa, please”. You grant her request and get in bed to cuddle with her, and Xinyu promptly wraps her long limbs around different parts of your body. “Oppa, you won’t leave me for anyone else, right?”, she asks, as if knowing of what happened in the restaurant with you and Dahyun. “Never, princess”, you assure her with a short but genuine answer. She pecks you in the neck before continuing, “I don’t care if I sound like a broken record every time I say it, but I really mean it every single time, oppa”. “I would much rather listen to a broken record than be the cause of a broken heart—does that makes sense, by the way?”, you say, earning a small chuckle from Xinyu. “I don’t know if it does, but I don’t care; my stomach hurts too much and I don’t want to think about anything”, she says.
-
Two weeks have passed since Dahyun’s little stunt, and it is now Friday on the 29th of September which can only mean one thing: day 1 of the outing trip. “We should give this trip a name”, Nakyoung says. “You should come up with it”, Xinyu and Yooyeon say at the same time—Yooyeon isn’t coming along, but she wants to be there when you leave. “Sure, I’ll try—you guys like making me do stuff, don’t you?”, Nakyoung says.
Yooyeon then turns to you, “Jisung-ah, can we talk for a second?”. You nod and walk to the other side of the bus with her to get some privacy. “What is it?”, you ask. Yooyeon rubs her forehead with a palm before speaking, “Dahyun-ie told me everything”. You signal to her to keep talking, so she does. “Will you be okay? Xinyu is also on this trip with you”, she asks. You take a deep breath before answering; “I’ll be fine. I’m planning to address it with her at some point during the trip”. Yooyeon gives you an encouraging smile and a fist bump. “Whatever decision you two come up with, try to make it easier for her, okay? She has a good heart, and I would hate to see her lose it”, she says. ”Oppa, where are you? We need to leave!”, Xinyu shouts from the other side of the bus. “That’s my cue”, you give Yooyeon a friendly hug, “I’ll see you on Monday, okay? I’ll treat you guys to lunch”.
You go back to where everyone was gathering and see that they’re getting on the bus one by one. You hold Nakyoung and Xinyu by their wrists to prevent them from getting on. “I’m counting on you two”, you say to them, “help me run the show, please”. They both give you a nod simultaneously, so you let them go and get on the bus with everyone. “Make sure nothing catches on fire when we’re away, okay? See you on Monday!”, you say to Yooyeon as you wave your goodbye, and she waves back with a smile. Once you are seated, the bus starts moving, thus marking the beginning of your last council initiation trip before graduating.
-
“We’re getting on the ferry, guys”, the co-driver says as the bus rolls onto the ship, “you can get off the bus if you want to. Just make sure you’re back in your seat in one hour”. After being given permission to get off, you walk to the upper deck to take in the sight of the strait. You lean against the railings and feel the fresh and relaxing breeze blowing at you. “Never knew how good it is to be on a ship. I wonder if mama and papa would be down for a cruise trip—for their anniversary, maybe? I should call them later”, you say to yourself
You close your eyes and savor the sense of freedom the sea is giving you, and you feel a hand on your back. “Hi, baby. Here for the wind as well?”, you say without looking. “I like how pet names escape your lips so naturally all the time”, the voice says. “Wait, that’s not Xinyu’s voice. That’s—“, you turn your head and see Dahyun in front of you. “Can I help you?”, you say, trying your best to stay composed. “You can, actually”, she says before pulling you away from the railings to hide behind a wall. “Stay still, please”, she tells you as she gets on her knees in front of you, “you know where this is going, don’t you?”. You can’t help but panic now, “Seo Dahyun, are you out of your mind? Xinyu will feed us to the sharks if she sees this”. “Please, oppa. Just this one time—Xinyu-unnie is busy with the other recruits right now”, she begs you.
You let out a deep sigh and start taking off your pants and boxers, piling them on your ankles. “Oh my God”, Dahyun exclaims, as she wraps her hand around your cock, “now I’m really envious of Xinyu”. You grit your teeth at the sensation, “that’s Xinyu-unnie to you”. “Fuck you”, she says before putting her lips around your cock. If Dahyun wasn’t on her knees with your cock in her mouth, you’d be offended and scold her, but she is, and you can’t think straight right now. “You better make this worthwhile, you slut”, you warn her. She removes your cock from her lips with a teasing smile, “keep the names for when you’re fucking me, oppa”, she says before continuing her work on your cock.
You’ve gotten a lot of heads before from your beloved, but Dahyun is doing an exceptional job right now: the way she’s licking the underside of your cock as her head moves along your shaft is different to how Xinyu usually does it. “This is a terrible time to think about Xinyu—fuck, I’m so sorry, my love”, you think to yourself. “This is the longest I’ve seen a guy last”, Dahyun says, taking a break from stuffing her face with your cock. “Are you going to finish this or what? If you can’t make me cum first try, you don’t deserve a second time”, you tease her. “Oh, I will, no need to worry about that”, Dahyun wipes her mouth before taking you in it again.
“You’ve had enough fun. Time to do it on my terms”, you say. You take her gloriously thick jet-black hair in your hand and start fucking her mouth deep. “Xinyu never gags, so you better not gag”, you provoke her—it’s not that Xinyu doesn’t gag at all, it’s just that she’s gotten more and more familiar your cock with every blowjob she’s done. You push the back of her head into your crotch and feel your tip hit the back of her throat. “Stay”, you command, and she does as you say (not that she has other options). After staying in that position for a few seconds, Dahyun starts gurgling loudly, so you show her some mercy and leave her mouth. Dahyun coughs and pants as she massages her neck, “holy shit, how does unnie do this all the time?”. “Because unlike you, she’s a good girl”, you then yank her hair and make her look up, “I’m gonna cum in your mouth and you’re gonna swallow it without letting a drop leak, is that clear?”. “Yes, oppa”, she says between pants. “Wrong fucking name”, you say sternly and yank her hair again. “Oh, fuck, my hair—yes, daddy”, she corrects herself.
You put your tip on her lips again and she opens her mouth obediently. “Be good”, you say as you start fucking her mouth harder and faster to chase your orgasm. You take it up a notch and pinch her nose shut as you fuck her face. Your brain starts wondering if you’re trying to make her your side slut, but that’s a question for later. For now, you’re aiming to shoot your load into her stomach. “I’m cumming, slut”, you say, as you release drop after drop after drop of cum into her mouth. The suddenness catches Dahyun off guard and makes her choke, but she tries her best to adhere to your command anyway.
You remove your cock from her mouth and see Dahyun swallow your cum in one gulp. “Good girl”, you praise her. You help her up to her feet and hug her, “let’s make sure no one knows this, yeah?”. “Yes, oppa”, she says, “I have a new idea, oppa”. You squint your eyes, expecting her to say something wild, “and that is?”. She looks at you straight in the eyes and utters her idea, “I can be your side girl, oppa”. You’re taken aback by her words, “what the fuck are you saying right now?”. She shrugs, “I figured since I can’t steal you from unnie, I’ll just be your side girl. You can come to me if Xinyu-unnie is unable to, um, please you”. The angel sitting on your right shoulder is yelling at you to say no, but the devil’s urge is stronger right now and you’re succumbing to it. “Sure, just make sure to keep this between us. Now let’s get out of here”, you say, feeling uneasy.
-
The 1-hour break flew by, and now you’re sitting on the bus again with Xinyu next to you. She leans her head on your shoulder and sighs, “where were you, oppa? I didn’t see you at all". Your eyes shake in nervousness, “I was sightseeing on the upper deck, baby. What about you?”. “Nakyoung-ie suggested that we should talk to the recruits and know them better considering who we are, but since you were away, I represented you and now I want to sleep”, she says with a yawn. You chuckle and pat her in the back, “that’s my girl. Get some sleep, baby. I’ll wake you up when we arrive”. “Your girl, huh? The one you just betrayed by getting a side chick? You’re fucking shitting me right now”, the angel insults you—you never knew an angel was capable of swearing, but you deserve it right now.
-
“Alright, guys; we’re here”, the co-driver announces. You tap Xinyu in the back a few times to wake her up. “Wake up, sweetie; we’ve arrived”, you say to her. “I wanna go home, oppa”, she says with a pout. “We’ll be home before you know it, love. Patience for now, please”, you persuade her. “I want your cock tonight”, she whispers to you, and you try your hardest to not blush (and get a boner).
You see the co-driver open the door, so you get up from your seat and get off the bus followed by Xinyu and everyone else. You ask everyone but Xinyu and Nakyoung to wait outside the resort complex while you go in and get the keys from the reception desk. “Good morning, miss. We’re from the Silicon Summit State University”, you say to the lady sitting at the desk.  “Good morning to you as well. Please wait a moment”, she says as she opens the book in front of her, “I’ll get your keys so please have a seat”.
She returns to you after a few minutes with a bag filled with keycards. “Here are your keys. Have a good stay and please don’t mess anything up—the hall is ready for use, by the way”, she says. You take the bag from her and say your farewell before leaving the front office.
“Attention, please”, you say in front of your crowd, “find the roommates you want to share a room with and line up in front of me with your group so that I can give you a keycard”. They do as you say and make groups of 3 with their preferred roommates. One group after another lines up in front of you, and you give each group a keycard to their room until every group has one. Everyone walks away to find their rooms, leaving the three of you alone with no keys left. “Did you miscount?”, you turn to Nakyoung. “11 rooms for 33 people and 1 room for Professor Kim, no?”, she says. “33 people? You didn’t count us, you dummy”, Xinyu pinches Nakyoung’s cheeks. “Wait, wait—aaaah, I’m so sorry”, Nakyoung says as she tries to push Xinyu away. Xinyu lets go of Nakyoung’s cheeks and turns to you, “so what do we do, oppa?”. You dismiss their worry, “it’s fine. I’ll head back in there and ask for 2 more rooms for you two and myself—I’ll pay, don’t worry”.
“Excuse me, miss”, you say to the lady again, “my friend miscounted how many people we have in the group, so now we need 2 more rooms. I sincerely hope you have some vacant ones right now”. She nods and fiddles with the computer in front of her, “we have 6 empty rooms right now and 2 of them are on opposite ends of the same corridor”. You sigh in relief, “I’ll take that 2, please”. She nods again, “sure, the previous 11 have been paid in full so you only need to pay 2”. She then tells you the sum and you hand her your card. “What about the breakfast and dinner buffet, miss?”, you ask as you enter your PIN. “No worries, I’ll tell the other staff members about the situation so that you can sit and eat with everyone”, she says as she hands your card back to you.
“Hey, girls”, you call out to Xinyu and Nakyoung, who then walk up to you. “Here’s your card. I hope you don’t mind sharing a room with Xinyu”, you hand Nakyoung a keycard. Xinyu looks at you in surprise, “I’m not sleeping with you?”. You shake your head, “you’re not. We don’t want the others to libel us”. Xinyu takes the card from your hand, “I’m so sorry, oppa. I’ll make it up to you one day”. “Don’t worry about it”, you pet her head, “now let’s get some rest before we start doing stuff, okay?”.
-
You walk with Xinyu and Nakyoung to find your rooms and get in as soon as you find it. “I’ll see you in 2 hours”, you say before closing the door behind you. You drop your bag on the bed and feel your phone vibrating in your pocket.
[🍒]
You’re alone, aren’t you?
Wanna fuck my face again?
[👑]
How did you know?
No, not in the mood
[🍒]
Curious much?
Just tell me if you want to cum
ㅋㅋㅋ
“I need to fuck some obedience into this girl, don’t I?”, you say with a sigh after. You throw your phone on the bed and start opening your back to get some shower supplies. You don’t like the soap and shampoo they offer at hotels and resorts because they don’t make foam. You then head to the bathroom to get a quick shower to refresh yourself after the long ride and the blowjob Dahyun gave you on the ferry.
-
The 2 hours are up, and now it’s time to go to the hall to officially start the initiation trip. You meet Xinyu and Nakyoung outside the hall, and Xinyu immediately runs to you and hugs you. “I miss you”, she says with a sad tone. “Cutie, it’s only been 2 hours”, you chuckle, “we’ve been apart for longer before”. “Yes, but not when we’re in the middle of nowhere”, she defends herself. You see Nakyoung roll her eyes, “oh, c’mon. 2 hours without oppa won’t kill you, and we’re not in the middle of nowhere, damn it”. Xinyu lets go of the hug to scold Nakyoung, but you pull her back into the hug by her wrist. “Calm down, please. This isn’t my apartment, let’s not make a scene here”. After taking a few seconds to calm down, you drag the two girls into the hall.
“Good afternoon, everybody”, you greet the council members, and they immediately look up from their phones. “Some of you have done this before while some others haven’t, but please allow me to welcome you all the same. I understand that this initiation trip might look or feel pointless to some of you, but it’s important to see this as an opportunity to get to know everyone better. You guys will spend a lot of time working with each other on projects, and that includes me, the vice president, and secretary”, you say and get collective nods as a reply.
“Now, let’s start by introducing ourselves, starting with me. My name is Jung Jisung. I was born in 2001, so this is my last dance both in the council and university. It has been an honor to be the president of the council, and I look forward to working with you guys in my last year—also, it’s okay if you find my title to be weird or cringe; I cringe when I hear people say that title out loud as well. Feel free to call me anything but sunbaenim, please”, you end your introduction with a small bow, “I’ll let those two girls introduce themselves”. Nakyoung pushes Xinyu to go first, so she takes a spot next to your right to introduce herself. “Hello, everyone. My name is Zhou Xinyu, born in 2002 in China. I was Jisung-oppa’s running mate back then and now I’m the vice president. I look forward to working with you guys as well”, she says. There’s nowhere Nakyoung can hide now, so she steps up to introduce herself. “Hi, hi”, she starts, “I’m Kim Nakyoung. I was also born in 2002 but unlike her, I was born in South Korea. Officially, I’m the secretary of the council but outside the office hours, I follow these two around like a third wheel”.
“Thank you, you two. Aside from the three of us, we also have a treasurer named Park Jaehwan, but he’s currently hospitalized for Dengue fever. In case you didn’t know, we also have governors who lead their own councils on the faculty level, and you’ll meet them soon as we collaborate for projects like community service”, you say, “now, let’s continue the train and have everyone introduce themselves”. At your words, Dahyun runs to the front with Chaeyeon behind her. “Hellooo!”, she says excitedly, “my name is Seo Dahyun but you can call me Soda. I was born in 2003 in Busan. I look forward to making memories with you guys”. You chuckle in amusement, “thank you, Dahyun-ah. Next person, please”. “Hi, hi, hello”, Chaeyeon says while waving, “I’m Kim Chaeyeon, born in 2004. I also look forward to making memories with you guys”. “Thank you, you two. Ministers, it’s your turn to shine now—you don’t want to lose out to these two, do you?”, Nakyoung says.
Like a real government, you also have a handful of ministers in your council. They are basically group leaders who have a handful of council members working with them and are usually tasked with coming up with projects and helping run things at the university level and sometimes the faculty level as well. In fact, one of them is coming up to introduce herself right now. “Hiiiiii”, she drags out her greeting in excitement, “my name is Park Aecha and I’m currently the minister of public relations. I was born in 2003 in Seoul and Park Jaehwan, the treasurer that Jisung-oppa mentioned earlier, is my older brother—please pray for him, by the way. Welcome to the council, guys!”.
As another minister walks up, Aecha leaves her spot to sit down again, but you pull her to the side first. “Aecha-yah, if you want to leave first, just say the word. We’re not holding you hostage here”, you say to her. “Thank you, oppa. I’m planning to leave tomorrow afternoon after the interviews, if that’s okay with you and the two girls. Only the three of you matter to me”, she says. “I guarantee you that we’re 1000% okay with that. If you hear anyone say otherwise, just tell me who and we’ll throw them into the strait”, you assure her. Aecha smiles and nods before leaving you to head back to her seat.
-
“Thank you for introducing yourselves, everyone”, Nakyoung says, “we will take a break for 2 more hours before gathering here again for a leadership and professional ethics class led by Professor Kim Taeyeon—we have a lot of down time today but believe me when I say that you should enjoy it as much as you can”. She looks in your direction, so you give her a nod; “dis-missed!”, she says with a voice crack, provoking a collective giggle from the crowd. “Good job, Nakyoung-ah”, you say to her. “Aaaaaah, why did my voice crack, oppaaaa”, she complains to you as she smacks you in the chest lightly. “It’s okay, happens to the best of us”, you chuckle as you pat her back. You then pull Xinyu in for a quick kiss. “I’ll see you girls in 2 hours; I want to sleep a bit—wake me up if I oversleep, okay?”.
You text Dahyun as soon as you enter your room, leaving the door slightly ajar.
[👑]
To my room, please
Door isn’t locked
Make sure no one sees you
[🍒]
On my way xoxo
You lay in bed after seeing her response and immediately hear the door swing open and slam shut. “That was quick”, you say when you see Dahyun in your room. “My room is right across from yours, oppa”, she confesses. “Huh, no wonder you knew where my room is”, you say. “Mhmm. Now, what can I do for you?”, she asks. You get up from the bed and tell her your wish, “I want you to take everything off—now”. She starts by taking off her short black cardigan that’s held together with just one button, revealing the sports bra she has underneath it; “that’s cute”, you comment. She then unbuttons her jeans and take them off, thus leaving her only in her sports bra and panties.
“Come here, I’ll finish the job for you”, you say to her. Dahyun then gets closer to you, “yes, daddy”. You pull the sports bra over her head and toss it somewhere without looking before kneeling to take off her panties. “I like that you keep it clean and shaved. Keep doing it, okay?”, you praise her. “Yes, da—oh, God, yes”, her words are cut off when she feels your tongue on her pussy. You yank her legs apart even more so that you can have more space to move your head closer to her pussy. You lick and suck her clit, forcing Dahyun to cover her mouth to muffle her moans. “Oppa, please”, she begs with a low voice, “please, that’s so good”. You want to make her cum to repay her “kindness” on the ferry, so you stick two fingers into her pussy without letting up the stimulations on her clit.
“I’m-I’m so close—please, oppa, please”, Dahyun says between muffled moans. You finger-fuck her pussy faster and keep licking her clit like it was the most delicious ice cream ever. “O-oppa, hug me, please”, she begs. So, you stand up and hug her as she requests. She hugs you tightly and muffles her scream by biting your shoulder, and you hear splashes on the floor—"she’s squirting, that’s fun”, you think to yourself. Dahyun immediately becomes limp in your arms, so you hold her to make sure she doesn't fall.
“I-I—fuck—haven’t cum that hard in so long”, Dahyun says with heavy pants, “thank you so much, oppa. I-I love you”. You lift her and put her in bed before leaving to get a towel and some water. “Here, have a drink, sweetie”, you say as you guide the bottle to her mouth. You let her hold the bottle herself and walk to the small puddle to clean it. “I’ll get back to you in a minute, okay?”, you say as you walk to the bathroom after cleaning the little mess.
“I’m guessing it’s my turn to make you cum?”, she weakly says. You put on a gentle smile, one that you usually show to Xinyu. “No, sweetie, it’s not. I just wanted to repay your kindness”, you peck her in the forehead, “I love you, baby”. She wipes a stray tear on her cheek, “but I’m just your side girl. Are you sure you want to say that?”. You take her hands and pull her into a hug, “yes, I am”. “Finally accepting her as your side chick, huh? Splendid job, son”, the devil praises you. You shake your head lightly to rid his voice from your brain and focus on the girl in your arms. “I’m so sorry but you need to leave soon, darling. Make sure no one sees you, okay?”, you peck the top of her head apologetically.
You help her put on her clothes, starting from her panties. Before you give her the sports bra back, you quickly nibble her tits; “soft and perky, exactly my favorites”, you comment. Dahyun blushes as she tries to put on her sports bra; “tha-thank you, oppa. I know they’re not as big—“. You cut her off by giving her a peck on the lips, “what’s the point of comparing yourself with others, sweetie?”. Dahyun’s cheeks get even redder at your words, “oh, how sweet. Xinyu-unnie must be—oh, fuck”. You cut her off again with a squeeze in the neck, “say her name one more time, I fucking dare you”. You let go of her neck right away and clarifies to her, “I can be both sweet and mean at any given moment. It just depends on how you act around me. Are we clear?”. She nods in understanding, so you hand her jeans back and she puts them on right away. “I like how you dress, sweetie. Dress like this when we’re together, please”, you say as she puts on her cardigan. After making sure that she’s ready to go, you give her a quick kiss on the lips and let her go back to her room. “Make sure no one knows about this, okay?”, you say as Dahyun leaves the room and closes the door behind her.
You take a glance at your watch and see that you have around 90 minutes before you need to go to the hall again. You decide to take a nap as planned until you either wake up from the alarm or a flurry of missed calls from Xinyu. “What are we becoming, Seo Dahyun?”, you question yourself, “oh, God, Xinyu would be so hurt if she finds out about this; she was my first and now I’m two-timing her—fuck, I’m so damn stupid”.
-
You wake up before the alarm rings, 20 minutes to spare before the session starts. You decide to go to the hall right away after texting Xinyu to tell her that you’re heading there first. You see Professor Kim Taeyeon walking to the hall as well, looking mad attractive as ever. “Professor Kim”, you greet her simply. “Hi, sweetie”, she says with a warm smile―she has a habit of calling her favorite students with pet names, and you entered her list after making the dean’s list thrice in a row. “You look like you have a lot going on. You can tell me, sweetie; you know I don’t judge”, she says as the both of you enter the hall. You picture in your head how hurt Xinyu would be if she finds out that you’re cheating, and the sting of guilt makes you shed a tear. “I, uh, I fucked up, professor”, you confess with tears on your cheeks, “I betrayed Xinyu terribly”. “Let’s sit down before we continue, okay?”, she takes your hand and drags you to sit down.
She makes you sit in front of her, “go on, please”. You decide not to hide anything from her because you trust her that much. “There’s this girl that has been chasing me even though she knows I’m dating Xinyu, and instead of addressing it with Xinyu and pushing her away, my dumb ass gave her the opportunity so now she’s my side chick—excuse my language, professor”, you confess teary-eyed while looking down in shame. Professor Kim sighs, and you figure that she’s disappointed in you. “I hope those tears are coming from a place of guilt”, she says. You nod, “Xinyu would be so hurt if she finds out, and I wouldn’t be able to make it up to her no matter what”. “Humor me with a question, Jisung-ah: which one is more important: your beloved Zhou Xinyu, who has been with you through storms and tranquility, or this new side chick—what’s her name, by the way?”. “Seo Dahyun, professor”, you say. “Seo Dahyun? The freshman?”, she questions you. “You know her, madam?”, you look up to her.  She sighs again, “I’ve met her parents before, and I had been told that you invested in them”. You nod again, “my family’s treasurer did it for me, so I don’t know the details”.
She takes your hand in hers and rubs the back of it softly, “would you please answer my question?”. You take a deep breath to recall the question before giving her your answer, “Xinyu is far more important to me than her, professor; she’s been by my side through everything”. She nods in understanding, “we all make mistakes, son—sometimes more regrettable than we’d like to admit, but what matters is how you can learn from it and become a better person”. “Your advice, madam?”, you ask her. It’s now the professor’s turn to take a deep breath, “you said that Xinyu is more important, so let Dahyun-ie go, Jisung-ah. Xinyu deserves the best of you while Dahyun-ie deserves much better than to be someone’s side chick”.
“Oppa!”, Xinyu shouts excitedly when she enters the hall, “oh, I’m sorry—hello, professor”. “Hi, darling”, Professor Kim says with a smile, “welcome”. Xinyu approaches the two of you and then turns to Professor Kim, “why is oppa crying, professor?”. Professor Kim gestures to Xinyu to sit down. “He had a lot in his mind but couldn’t bring himself to talk to you, so he shared some of them with me instead”, she says, “tell me, darling: do you love your president-oppa here?”. Xinyu looks at you and Professor Kim in confusion, “I do, professor. I love him with my entire being”. Professor Kim looks at you with a motherly smile, “see, son? Xinyu loves you as much as you love her. What else is there to doubt?”. Professor Kim then stands up from her seat to prepare for the class, “I’ll give you some space to talk, okay?”.
Xinyu pulls you to your feet and hugs you tautly, “oppa, what is she talking about? Are you okay?”. “I’m okay, sweetie. I’m-I’m so sorry”, you say in a shaky voice, “my mind was full of bullshit, but I didn’t want to bother you with them”. Xinyu sheds a tear of her own after hearing your words, “but-but why not, oppa? Am I not your girlfriend? You can talk to me about your worries, you know”. You pull away from the hug and wipe her tears, “I just couldn’t muster up the courage to talk to you about it, baby. You already have a lot to worry about so I just wanted to be the shoulder you can lean on”. Xinyu puts her forehead on yours, “I’m always here for you, oppa, the same way you’re always here for me”. You nod and peck her forehead, “I love you, darling. I’m sorry for making you worried. Now let’s calm down, okay? People will be here soon”.
-
You are holding hands with Xinyu during the session, and time flies by like it was nothing. Professor Kim is now offering advice to people who want it, and people start raising their hands. She tells each of them what they need to hear no matter how cold it might sound. “We all make mistakes in our lives, and that’s okay”, she says, repeating her advice for you from earlier, “what’s important is how you deal with it, learn from it, and become a better person after, because falling in the same hole twice is simply foolish. I know I do not look and act like a wise person all the time, but this is what I’ve learned throughout my life—I’ve been in your shoes, but you haven’t been in mine”. You squeeze Xinyu’s hand after hearing the professor’s advice. “I promise I’ll keep improving and become a better person for us, love. You deserve the best of me the same way I deserve the best of you”, you whisper to her. “I love you, oppa”, she whispers back, as if it wasn’t clear as day already.
When you turn to Professor Kim again, you see that she’s smiling at you and Xinyu before turning back to the audience. “Does anyone have any more questions?”, she asks, but no one raises their hand. “One more thing before we wrap things up, ladies and gents: remember to always be honest with yourself and those you love. Tell them you love them and are grateful for them”, she adds, “we come and go like on the freeway, so hold them close while you can”. You look down to process the things she just said, trying not to cry in front of the whole council as you feel like a revelation has been brought to you, courtesy of the one and only Professor Kim Taeyeon. “You may go now”, the professor dismisses the crowd, “I’ll see you back at campus in a few days. Good evening”.
Everyone but Xinyu and Professor Kim has left the hall to do whatever, leaving the three of you in the room. “Take care of each other, will you? I want to see you two live a good life—together, hopefully”, she says. “Thank you, professor. Have a safe flight back”, Xinyu says with a respectful bow. The professor gives her a smile and starts walking away, giving space for you two to have a little catch-up.
You jump up from your seat and pull Xinyu into a passionate kiss. “Thank you for being in my life, baby”, you say after breaking the kiss, “I will do my best to be the best boyfriend for you”. “Oppa, I’m thankful for you as well, you know”, she says in such a calm manner that you rarely hear (because she’s energetic and loud most of the time) combined with a smile that’s as warm as the morning sun, “I’d like to make a promise as well, love: I promise to always be by your side through thick and thin and be the beautiful and graceful girlfriend that you deserve—do you know why, baby?”. You shake your head to encourage her to continue and see where this is going, “because I love you so much, honey, and I sincerely ask you to never leave me because I can’t picture myself alone without you—I’ve never been selfish before, so please allow me to be selfish just this one time”. Xinyu very rarely uses pet names with you, only referring to you as “oppa” (or “daddy” when you two are in bed), so the words she’s saying are hitting you harder than ever, working wonders to convince you to cut ties with Dahyun. The professor was right: these two girls deserve the best life has to offer, and you can’t cater to both at the same time without hurting one of them.
-
You take her hand with a smile and drag her to leave the hall. “Baby, can you come to my room, please?”, you ask her. “For what reason, Mr. President?”, she says, smirking. You turn the gears in your head to come up with an answer. “You want me to stay by your side, yeah? I’ll do you one better”, you lean in so you can whisper in her ear, “how about I stay inside you instead, baby, hm?”. Xinyu turns away to hide her tomato cheeks. “Oh, my fucking—oppaaaa, what are you saying right noooow? Fuck me, are you even listening to yourself, oppa?”, she says, flustered. You double down and tease Xinyu more. “Fuck you? Yeah, that’s the plan; I’ll be cumming inside you as well”, you say with a naughty smirk. “Aaaaah, why are you like this, oppaaaa”, Xinyu whines, her blush is obvious for anyone to see. You chuckle in amusement, “alright, baby, that’s enough playing around. Now, would you kindly follow me to my room?”.
You decide to call Nakyoung to ask about today’s schedule before jumping into the action. “Nakyoung-ah”, you say as soon as she picks up, “where are you?”. “I’m in my room. I saw that you guys were busy, so I left first”, she says. “Yeah, it’s fine. We had some personal things we needed to address with each other”, you explain, “we don’t have anything important after this, do we? Just the dinner?”. “What do you mean ‘just the dinner?’ We’ll be asking them to make an essay on council project ideas before dinner, remember?”, she says. “Oh, right”, you say, “anyway, we’re skipping dinner, so if anyone asks, tell them we need some time alone and that we’re sorry. We’ll go over their essays with the ministers tomorrow morning”. “Yeah, I can do that”, Nakyoung agrees to your request, “are you guys okay, though? I saw both of you bawl your eyes out earlier. You’re not breaking up, are you?”. Xinyu takes the phone from your hand, “no, we’re not breaking up. In fact, we’ll be solidifying our relationship tonight”. You hear Nakyoung laugh over the phone, “sure, girl, whatever you say—just keep it down when you do it, ‘kay? Have fun!”.
-
Fun is exactly what you’re aiming for tonight, and while Xinyu knows that as well, you don’t want to jump to it right away. “Baby girl”, you softly call out to her, “I’m not horny for the sake of it, but I do want to show you how much I love you and my options are limited right now”. Xinyu rubs your cheek with her thumb gently, “Oh, is that so? Show me then, oppa, and I’ll show you my love as well”.
Usually, you start by taking off Xinyu’s clothes but this time, you decide to switch it up and take off yours first. “Is it just me or are those biceps bigger?”, Xinyu comments. You flex in front of her, “I don’t know, I haven’t noticed anything yet”. Xinyu’s eyes move down to your cock, “that looks bigger too”. You chuckle, “there’s no need to inflate my ego, love”. “Inflate your—no, I’m dead serious!”, she says as she moves to hold your cock, “you will stretch me for sure”.
Snicker as you pull Xinyu up to her feet to kiss her. “I love you, baby, and I don’t care if I sound like a broken record because I mean it every time”. Xinyu furrows her eyebrows as she tries to remember something. “Wait, that’s my line from when I was bitching about my period, no?”, she crosses her arms and pouts, “apologize for stealing my line or I’m not letting you in my pants—don’t forget the pet name”. “I’m sorry for stealing your line, baby—also, you weren’t bitching; you were in real pain”, you say, adhering to her demand, “can I get in your pants now?”. Xinyu shoves you softly, “sit on the bed and watch me strip”.
Xinyu takes a few steps back and takes off her T-shirt, revealing her tits that’s covered with a simple white bra. You start stroking your cock at the sight, and Xinyu throws her T-shirt at you, “impatient, hm? I like it; makes me feel wanted and beautiful, you know?”. You groan after a particular stroke, “I always want you, beautiful—respectfully”. Xinyu shakes her head as she unbuttons her jeans and pull them down, “you and your words, oppa”.
The sight of Xinyu in her underwear (or naked—just so we’re clear) never gets old for you; “it has to be illegal to be this hot”, you utter while mindlessly stroking your cock. “I can’t get these off, oppa. Wanna help?”, she teases. You’ve never acted so quickly at anyone’s words before, as you jump off the bed and approach her; “woah, relax, oppa”, Xinyu comments. “I don’t know what that word means”, you say, possessed by lust. You make quick work of her bra and panties and throw them to God-knows-where. You then pull her in for a kiss, your tongue wrestling hers like it was AEW.
Xinyu breaks the kiss after a minute so that she can breathe. “Fuck, baby, I want you so bad right now”, you say with a deep, lustful voice. “Just—fuck—just take me already, oppa. I can’t fucking wait anymore”, she says, her breath heavy from the lust. You carry Xinyu to the bed and make her take the bottom position. “Oppa, please, let’s start already—OH”, Xinyu covers her mouth tightly as you immediately ram your cock into her pussy and start fucking her deep. “You’re stretching me, you’re stretching me”, she chants softly in your ear after biting you on the shoulder. You’re tempted to leave a hickey (or a dozen), but you don’t want people to know that you’re having sex, so you leave her neck and chest alone.
Xinyu almost lets out a loud moan, but you squeeze her neck just in time before she does. “I’m sorry, love, but we can’t afford to get caught”, you say to her. “You-you—just cover my mouth, don’t cho-choke me”, she says with troubled breath. You let her neck go and retreat from her exceptionally wet pussy. “On your stomach, please”, you say, “moan into the pillow”. Xinyu nods and rolls over onto her stomach, and you lift her ass up to get a better angle to bang her. After making sure that her face is pressed into the pillow, you start fucking her again, harder this time. You can’t hear what Xinyu’s saying right now, but that’s the whole point of using the pillow.
As you keep fucking her from behind, her asshole keeps peeking from behind her cheeks, and your cock, which has taken over your brain as an organ of thoughts, urges you to do something about it. You take your index finger and touch Xinyu’s rear entrance, and she turns to look at you instantly. “Don’t hurt me, please. I’ve never put anything in there, oppa”, she says. You nod, “do you consent?”. Xinyu gives you a little nod, so you start pushing your finger into her forbidden hole and it forces Xinyu to bite the pillow. “Ngh, you-you’re stretching me, oppa”, she says, and you’re not sure if her expression is that of someone in pain. “Are you okay, baby? Do you want me to pull it out?”, you ask her softly despite your pants. “I-I think I’m fine—try putting in another finger gently”, she says.
You stop your thrusts to focus on the task at hand and put your middle finger in her ass as gently as possible. You hear Xinyu make some sound, but you maintain your concentration and patience to work on her asshole, until her ass finally gives way for your fingers. “S-so full”, she says, “is this what—hngh, God—anal feels like?”. You shake your head in cluelessness, “can I go again, baby?”. “Only if you promise to not your move fingers as you fuck me”, she says. “Of course, love”, you say
You notice as you’re fucking her again that her pussy keeps squeezing your cock randomly and you suspect that she’s close. “Fuck, you’re so tight, princess”, you praise her as you up the pace. “I’m close, oppa; make me cum, please”, she says, confirming your suspicion. Pull out your fingers so that you only need to concentrate on one thing, which is fucking her in the pussy with your cock; “the ass play can wait”, you think to yourself.
“Oppa, I’m cumming; pull out for a second, please”, she utters, so you do as she asks and pull out. You see Xinyu scream into the pillow as you feel her juice hit you in the pelvis area. You wait until she’s done squirting before fucking her again. “I know you’re still sensitive, but I can’t wait. I’m sorry”, you say to her. Xinyu’s moans are getting worryingly loud, so you put a hand on the back of her head to make sure the pillow stifles the sound.
You feel your cock leak in her pussy, and you’re reminded that you haven’t asked if it’s okay to cum inside. “Darling, is it safe today?”, you ask her. “I’ve been taking pills since after my last period, oppa”, she says. “I’m sorry I didn’t ask earlier”, you apologize to her, “I’m cumming inside you, okay, love?”. A few pumps later, you sense that you’re about to bust, so you lodge your cock as deep as you can in her pussy and open the valves. “Stay inside, oppa”, Xinyu says weakly, “God, so warm every time”.
You’ve spent your entire vigor fucking Xinyu, so now you feel weak. “Xinyu-yah, can I pull out now?”, you ask her. “You can, but before you do”, she says, “I want you to take a video of my pussy as your cum drips out of me, oppa”. You’re bewildered by her request, “can I ask why?”. “You’ve said multiple times how hot it looks but I don’t know what it looks like, and now I’m curious”, she answers. You look around the room, “I mean, sure, but where is my phone?”.
Thankfully (and conveniently enough), your phone is on the bedside table under the lamp, within arm’s reach. You open the camera app and switch to video mode, “I’m pulling out, baby”. You aim the camera at your cock as you’re pulling out, and it only occurs to you now how big of a cock it looks, especially on camera; no wonder Xinyu was intimidated and hesitant at first. After your whole shaft is out, you move your aim to record her pussy and wait until your cum starts spilling out of her. “Oh, that’s so thick actually”, you comment as you see your cum escape her pussy. “Yeah, your cum is always thick”, Xinyu replies, “now mute the audio and send it to me”. You fiddle with your phone for a moment and notify her that it’s been done, and Xinyu drops her waist onto the bed to rest.
“You and I are not finished yet, miss vice president”, you say as you lift and carry her on your shoulder. “You want to go again, oppa? You want to make me scream my lungs out this time?”, she says—Xinyu has this pure, innocent girl façade but she’s quite naughty actually. You chuckle, “I’m spent, love. What I meant is I want to help you clean up—stop being so perverted all the time, hon, damn”. “Aaah, oppa, why are you teasing me like that? It’s not my fault you’re so good at sex”, she complains while smacking your back playfully.
You make her sit on the toilet and kneel in front of her. “I’m good at sex because of you, love. You’re my first so I hadn’t the slightest clue about sex back then, but you patiently helped and guided me and here we are”, you tell her. You always mean what you say—well, 90% of the time—so Xinyu knows without a shadow of a doubt that your words are sincere. “You just fucked my brains out and now you’re talking like this, oppa?”, Xinyu says. She then takes a breath and starts her rant: “this is why I want to stay by your side, oppa. Imagine what it would be like for me if you left and then I got with someone else and because I’ve been so conditioned to hearing your sincerity and honesty, I couldn’t tell if my boyfriend was lying, and then—". You cut off her train of words with a kiss. “I understand, love. I want to stay with you as much as you want to stay with me—cross my heart”, you say to her with a smile. “There you go, son”, the angel makes a return and commends you, “you’ve finally remembered how important she is to you”.
You stand up and pull her into the shower, and then Xinyu pulls you into another kiss. “Your cock is poking me”, she giggles, “are you actually still horny? Want me to suck you?”. ‘Tis your turn to chuckle, “how can I not have a boner when you’re naked in front of me?”. She turns away from you and puts her hands on the wall, “One day, I’ll be naked for you 24/7 and just let you do whatever to me: play with my tits, cum on my face, shove your cock down my throat, et cetera”. You feel a rush of excitement in your head instantly, “um, can we do that next weekend?”. She lets out a laugh, “you can’t have enough of me ever, can you?”.
“No”, you say firmly, “I can’t. You’re just too hot”.
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danieyells · 7 months ago
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@2flowerz NOW I CAN POST THEM LOL HERE'S ED TO START WITH
PERVY OLD VAMPIRE IS AN ABSOLUTE GOOBER. . .he's also very very tired. But he has a very nice reaper taking care of him and a friendly dog that wants him to go outside more, so he has people who love and care for him even though he's. . .a little troublesome haha.
also I changed the format from previous posts and added the specific times and seasons and such for each dialogue! this should help lessen some confusion about how to get them.
Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)
"Ah, there you are. I've a favor to ask of you— come to my room and I'll explain."
You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)
"Oh? It appears we have some letters. Alas, my eyesight is not what it used to be. Read them out to me, would you?"
well maybe if you didn't stare at your tablet all day. . . .
Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)
"I have much to learn about the human world... Rui is teaching me a lot, but I cannot seem to divorce myself of careless blunders."
y'know, it's good he's trying to learn anyway. 400 years old is never too late.
"What did I do before Darkwick? I eked out a humble existence in Eastern Europe. Hm? The most powerful vampire? No, those are just rumors. "
didn't you confirm it yourself in the main story though--also if he was living in eastern europe for the past 400-ish years i wonder if he saw lyca when he was young, even if in passing? then again eastern europe isn't exactly small.
"I was taken by a sudden whim to travel abroad. I had heard good things about Japan so I came over to play, but alas, I was captured."
so he went to japan just to have a nice time for a while but the Institute decided to keep him trapped in Darkwick. . .and then they didn't listen to any warnings or concerns he had. . .no wonder he doesn't give a shit what's going on around here, why would he? They abducted him while he was on vacation--and for what?
"I have no interest in harming humans. After all, they die so quickly. They should enjoy their short lives while they can."
"(cough cough) Oh, it's you... I'm feeling worse than usual today. I don't suppose you could carry me to bed?"
Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)
"(yawn) Good morning... What time is it? ...Still that early? Wake me up again at midday, would you?"
honestly Ed? Mood.
Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)
"If this is about a mission, I can't help you, I'm afraid. I leave such day-to-day duties to Rui, so I suggest you ask him instead."
Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"I'm more or less confined to this house most days, for various reasons. I'm on my best behavior. But I'll do what I can to support you from the sidelines."
y'know, he's offering to help a little even at Affinity 3 and that counts for something in my book.
Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)
"My favorite channel should be posting a new video at any moment... Sorry, but could we continue this tomorrow?"
you have not yet reached the stage of friendliness where you're more important than a youtube video lmao
Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)
"I don't suppose you know where Rui is? How troubling... My YouTube video has stopped playing..."
well at this hour i'd check either the bar or his room???
Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"Oh, it hurts... I cannot seem to shake this ache in the place Rui touched me earlier... I think I'll rest a while."
so it seems like either his limbs pop off/part of him breaks open when Rui touches him, or he suffers a great deal of pain for an extended period of time, maybe his body actively fighting extremely rapid necrosis? Rui did say that he basically insta-kills anyone who isn't super strong, so Ed being in excruciating pain instead of dying or losing a limb now and then makes sense.
Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)
"I can't survive much sunlight. Without my parasol, I can barely go outside... (sigh) It really is quite punishing..."
Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"Sounds like Lyca's having fun, from all that yapping. I think it's good for him to develop some temporary bonds with humans at this time in his life."
Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)
"I felt the urge to go stargazing, so I went to a hill nearby, but Towa was there already and he chased me away."
TOWA STOP BEING MEAN HE actually he probably would have bothered you and if he smells like a corpse to you that would have been annoying even if he didn't talk to you BUT STILL DON'T BE MEAN.
Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)
"You ought to be getting ready for bed. Me? Oh, I'll turn in soon... Just one more YouTube video."
Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)
"Are you going for a walk? Take care not to spend too long in the garden. Humans are rather susceptible to the miasma there."
WE NEVER DID LEARN ABOUT THE MIASMA. WHAT'S UP WITH THE MIASMA WHY'S THE AIR IN OBSCUARY FUNKY.
Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)
"Do you realize that human society is controlled by a shady cabal of elites? There are many videos about it on YouTube."
I AM ONCE AGAIN ASKING FOR HIS LAPTOP TO BE TAKEN AWAY OR TIME ON IT RESTRICTED. . .HE'S INTO CONSPIRACY THEORY YOUTUBERS HE'S GONE TOO FAR DOWN THE RABBITHOLE
Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"The ghouls are rioting again? Ah ha ha ha, they certainly are full of energy. If you'll excuse me, I was in the middle of a YouTube video."
he simply does NOT GIVE A FUCK lmao the ghouls could be dying out there and he'd probably shrug it off. Maybe keep an eye on things with his sixth sense or have some bats watch. Maybe that's part of why so many ghouls dislike him? he doesn't have any concerns for their plights and problems?
Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)
"How strange... I can't find my other sock. I could have sworn I put it here... Have you seen it?"
Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)
"Lyca made a mess again? Ah ha ha ha. Try not to judge him too harshly—he's not human, after all."
i think even for non-humans there's some cleanliness to be strived for. . .even pigs are pretty clean animals from what I hear. . . .
Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)
"Rui? Is my lunch ready yet? ...Oh, it's you. You wouldn't happen to be feeling heartsore, would you?"
he's asking if you're sad because he feeds off of tears more than blood. . . . .he wanted to see if you'd cry for him. . . . . . .wait how does Rui usually go about doing this!? Does he cry every day for him???
Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)
"Rui has his tavern work at this hour. He made sure I had everything I needed before he left, though."
ed's all cozy in bed with a nice bottle of tears and his fully charged tablet, all the dirty laundry's off his floor and everything--and now you're here! everything is perfect.
Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)
"Has night fallen already? Do keep in mind that my vitality returns at this hour. You really should be more careful."
i'm kinda getting Taiga vibes here where as his affinity goes up he kind of clearly wants to eat you more, except where Taiga kinda tried to keep away from doing it until Affinity 24 where he snaps and ties you down and starts hurting you, Ed just starts warning you 'you're in danger being around me right now' lol. When he tells you to be careful he makes the sadist face, so he is telling you to be careful around him specifically. . . .
Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)
"You can't sleep? Come, close your eyes. I'll hold you in my arms until you surrender yourself to the land of slumber."
isn't Ed's skin cold. . .I feel like it may be hard to sleep like that for most people lol then again maybe he'd be perfect for temperature regulation?
Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)
"Ah, thank you for coming so early. I slept even worse than usual last night... The cleaning can wait. Let me rest my head on your lap, would you?"
'the cleaning can wait' huh. . .is this another Jin situation where he's started to expect you to clean up his room all the time lmao I MEAN RUI ONLY CLEANS IT ONCE A MONTH SO A LITTLE SUPPLEMENTARY CLEANING WOULDN'T HURT. . . .
Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)
"How are you finding Obscuary? Anomalies live quite differently to humans, so you're adapting to it remarkably well... Perhaps you're predisposed?"
'hey i know you're probably scared about becoming an anomaly that will harm your loved ones and all but you may already be showing signs so you should just stop worrying and join us!' also do they really live so differently. . .so far the main difference is cleanliness lmao
Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)
"My, where did the time go? Talking to you is just so relaxing. Why? Perhaps it's because I know I could feast upon you at any moment."
in Japanese he says something like "The sense of security of being able to strike at any moment"--he's saying he could bite you and you're so comfortable with him you wouldn't even put up a fight before he could do it. He's making his 'sadist' face, but I think he means it in a 'you're relaxed around me, and it makes me feel comfortable to' way. . . .or not. He could just mean that he appreciates you as easy prey 8D
Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)
"Really. You became embroiled in another petty human dispute? How absurd you humans are. Come here."
he feels so bad for you and always getting involved in some shit. . .you know you wouldn't have to do any of this if you abandoned your humanity and just became an anomaly?
Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)
"So, you've come sneaking into my room in the middle of the night? You really are a wicked girl. What were you hoping for? Go on, say it."
Do you want him to feed off of you? Or do you want him to feast upon you? Or were you just that starved for his company? I feel like he's willing to put aside his tablet for you at this point, especially if you're coming into his window late at night for a little tryst.
Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)
"Being with you brings up old, old memories... Perhaps it's because you remind me a little of her."
well he is hundreds of years old, so of course he had lovers in the past. . .I wonder if she was also mortal, and if he refuses to see humans and anomalies as compatible because of heartbreak. Or maybe he doesn't get heartbroken like some humans do, and it's just nostalgia. But for someone who struggles to remember things sometimes to have old memories stirred up, I think that's a good thing. He must feel quite old at this point, but having someone around who reminds him of being even a little younger must be nice, even if he doesn't think it will last. . .then again maybe that's part of why he seems like he encourages you to become an anomaly in his character stories. Because he'll get to have you around for longer.
Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)
"The plants in our garden become rather lively in the spring. See? There's a little cannibalism going on over there."
(between 11am and 4pm)
"My favorite channels have been updating more frequently than usual of late. I suppose humans really do experience spring fever."
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"(yawn) I look more tired than usual? Must be the spring weather... Goodnight."
(between 8pm and 5am)
"Cherry blossoms are fascinating organisms. Born carrying the stench of death and falling all too soon... Just like humans, really."
i don't think most humans smell like death(unless we're referencing the poem about sakura trees having corpses beneath them to make the petals pink again) but go off i guess--also it makes it seem like he wishes humans lived longer? funny thing for a guy who thinks humans aren't compatible to say.
Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)
"Obscuary is lovely in summer. It's so dark and cool, with a lovely miasma breeze. I've no desire to step outside its confines."
honestly living in eternal night during the summer doesn't sound bad aside from all the bugs. but the tentacle plant in the garden probably keeps most of them away, so. . .obscuary in summer sounds lovely.
(between 11am and 4pm)
"How the sun mocks me... Vampires across the nation are advised to avoid going outdoors unless absolutely necessary."
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"It was so hot this morning that Rui was walking around after his shower in just a towel. A sight for sore eyes, I must say."
HAPPY PRIDE MONTH HE IS BISEXUAL. in Japanese he says that Rui was walking around soaking wet and that he's incredibly handsome but doesn't mention the towel--so Rui may have been wet and bare naked walking around Obscuary. . . .
(between 8pm and 5am)
"My air-conditioner? I believe I have it set to 64 degrees. Hm? You're cold? Humans truly are such fragile creatures."
that is almost 18 degrees celcius for the non-americans! it's not that cold imo but it's definitely a little chillier than most people like their personal space.
Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)
"Humans take extra delight in their meals during the harvest season, do they? Interesting. Perhaps I'll follow suit."
lap up your tears nice and slow and sensual--
(between 11am and 4pm)
"The stamina and physical strength of a vampire is dozens of times that of a human. We don't need to work ou— (cough) (wheeze)"
YOU GOOD BUDDY YOU STARTED COUGHING WITHOUT EVEN MOVING i mean i get it i have asthma but still--
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"Ah, the curtain of night closes. Now that the days are becoming shorter, my physical and mental health have much improved."
does that mean you don't need help getting dressed for a while--
(between 8pm and 5am)
"How beautiful the moon looks tonight. Its light is such a comfort to us non-humans. You look rather lovely bathed in it too."
Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)
"(sigh) Even in the dead of winter, Lyca is so full of energy in the mornings... Just try to imagine waking to him barking in your ear."
that explains why you lock him out of your room lmaoooo
(between 11am and 4pm)
"What do you think of my dressing gown? Rui made it for me. It's surprisingly warm."
MOM RUI STRIKES AGAIN MAKING HIS BOY COZY CLOTHES FOR THE WINTER
(between 4pm and 8pm)
"(cough cough) I only took a few steps outside, yet I felt as though my heart froze over... It's best not to leave one's room on days like this."
(between 8pm and 5am)
"They say that on cold nights like this, humans long for the warmth of another. Well? Shall I provide it for you?"
DO YOU POSSESS THE WARMTH OF ANOTHER SIR I RECALL YOUR SKIN BEING DESCRIBED AS COLD
His birthday: (November 10th)
"Having you celebrate my birthday makes all these long years of life worth it. How old am I? A gentleman doesn't tell."
given your estimate was 'idk 400 i stopped counting around 300' i think it's less you won't tell and more you can't tell lmaoooo
Your birthday:
"It's your birthday, is it? I'll have to give you a present. What do you want? Go on, tell me."
New Years: (January 1st)
"Happy New Year. I heard it's a tradition in this country to impart small monetary gifts. Here, for you."
OTOSHIDAMA GET!!!!
Valentine's Day: (February 14th)
"My, is this for me? I'm touched. I don't usually partake of human food, but I suppose I'll make an exception."
it's about the symbolism! it's the principle of the thing, even if the chocolate tastes bland to your vampire taste buds!
White Day: (March 14th)
"It seems that today those who received chocolates on Valentine's Day are supposed to return the favor. What a conscientious country this is..."
yeah but what'd you get them tho--
April Fool's Day: (April 1st)
"Oh, I'm burning up... I'm not long for this world... Won't you grant me one last request? ...No need to make that face. I'm joking, of course."
Halloween: (October 31st)
"Trick or treat. I'm a real vampire, you know. Give me your blood, or I'll play a trick on you."
probably the only time he's directly stated wanting to drink your blood lol
Christmas: (December 25th)
"Merry Christmas. Rather amusing for a vampire to celebrate a holy day, don't you think? Let's fill tonight with magic and wonder."
Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)
"I'm going to lie down a while. If you need something, ask Rui."
(13 affinity and above)
"Hello? Oh good, there you are. It would be troublesome for me if you were to disappear. Let me know next time you decide to wander off."
WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'D BE TROUBLESOME. I guess it's because you clean up after him and help him and stuff. . .and at higher affinities maybe he feeds off of your tears and/or blood. . . .
Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)
"Well, hello there. It's been a while. Come over here—I've been looking forward to your return."
OUR SLOPPY LIL VAMPIRE BOY. Flirts, drinks tears, minds his own business, and is on his best behavior despite that he was abducted by Darkwick. They should be thankful he's not angrier, considering he's apparently strong enough to LEVEL A BUILDING ON HIS OWN. As his affinity goes up he seems to be more comfortable around you, although that comes with the concern that he expresses less human thoughts more openly. . .which isn't a bad thing, imo. He should be allowed to be an anomaly. He's not harming or preying on you, just saying he could and that he's dangerous. But he also just seems to like physical affection and flirting and having you do chores for him so he can be lazy. . . .
I love him lol he's stinky
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so-long-soldier-writes · 7 months ago
Text
Gemini Coven Better Watch Out
kai parker x reader | requested
summary: kai comes back from his sister's with new magic and a new mission
tags: rough kissing, neck kissing, dirty talk, breeding kink, unsafe sex, biting
word count: 2.1k
a/n: biggest apologies for the time it took to fill this!! also, i realize now, i could've done this in headcanon format and probably had it out sooner, but ngl i've kinda wanted to use the scene post-kai taking jo's magic in a work anyway, so it works out lol
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Kai comes back from his sister’s with a newfound energy. The recently-merged siphon witch had been feeling ill the last twelve hours, and after wondering what it could be to make him so sick, he decided to seek her advice. Despite hating him for all he’s done, Jo’s still a doctor, and she’s probably the only one that could have any clue how to help him. So Kai went alone, not wanting to freak out Ric with the both of you there, and hoped his sister would take pity on his weakened state.
He barely gets through the doorway before grabbing your shoulders and kissing you passionately. He backs you up to the nearest wall. You can feel his dimples against your skin as he smiles. 
Kai feels healthy again. His strength has obviously returned, and he’s no longer sweating nor coughing up blood. Three different energies seem to swirl about in his blood. You can sense them, a witch yourself, and if he were to siphon you, you bet you’d get dizzy fast. 
His hands explore your body. Fingertips trail down your figure, until determined palms grip your waist. He kisses down your neck, kisses getting sloppier as his lips travel south. For a moment, he pauses, panting against your skin. You giggle, threading your hands through his hair, and take your opportunity to talk. 
“What’s all this for? Feeling better?”
He presses another kiss to your collarbone. “Much.”
“Good. What worked?”
“I needed Jo’s magic for the merge to work properly. Luke as a substitute made me the leader, but it didn’t give me the strength I needed because he wasn’t my twin.”
“She gave it to you?”
“With some convincing. But if she didn’t, I would’ve died, causing the death of the rest of our dumb coven, and all the prison worlds would have collapsed, leading to who knows what kind of destruction. That seemed to convince her.”
“Well, good. Because I can’t have you dying on me. I love you too much for you to leave me.”
He smiles, then kisses again. His teeth lightly graze your neck, and you drop your hands from his hair to his own neck in surprise. 
Kai’s always spurred on by those words, but today, they seem to set a fire in him more than ever. He teases the skin beneath your shirt as he pulls at the fabric. His lips reattach to your neck, kissing and nipping along it as if it’s the last thing he’ll ever do. When you put a hand to his chest, his heart is racing. 
You’re not sure what’s gotten him in such a mood at three in the afternoon, but the more heated he gets, the more you start to burn between your legs. You start to clench them together, fighting the feeling, but he notices quickly with a tsk of the tongue. 
“Ah, ah, ah,” he clicks, then picks you up and tosses you gently onto the couch. 
Kai climbs on top of you as you start to laugh and writhe on the soft material. He’s like an animal that’s captured its prey, but wants to tease it first. A dark look takes over his eyes, contradicting the smile that still rests on his face. His clothed hard makes contact with your bare leg, making you gulp. One look down reveals the wet spot forming under your skirt. He pets it gently, eliciting a moan from you.
He kisses your knee before moving his lips down your inner thigh. Excitement grows, however, so does curiosity. You want him, but you want answers first. Specifically, what happened at his sister’s that’s gotten him so turned on? Is it the volume of magic in his blood? The overwhelming power? Or is it a degradation from her mouth? His need to prove himself in spite of her words?
You open your mouth to ask, but his eyes meet yours as soon as you do. His dark look waivers your confidence. His fingers dig underneath your panties, stimulating your clit with ease. Your breath catches, causing you to squeal. A shiver runs through your body. He positions himself to kiss your lips at the same time he’s touching you. 
Question temporarily forgotten, you capture his face in his hands to kiss him back. He’s rough, still, pulling your bottom lip with his teeth and clutching your side between his nails, but remains gentle on your most sensitive tissue. Kai pries your legs open wider with his own. His hard is desperate against the rough material of his jeans. He rubs it along your leg every time he drops his lips back down to your neck, then up to your face again. The friction gets him panting and you hungry. You ache with a need for him to fill you. His teasing is too much, heating up your body, but neglecting where you need him most. 
“Kai,” you whimper, giving into the need. You can get him to do almost anything you want when you say his name with that tone. The touch-starved man turns to butter for you.
“What’s it, baby? Whatcha need?”
“Need you. Need your-” you reach for him, but your finger tips only graze his stomach. The space between your bodies is closing in as he starts to grind more on your leg. 
“Need me, hm?” He whispers it into your neck, causing another shiver. “Where do you need me?” The two fingers on your clit slip between your folds. You bite your lip and grab at his waist for support. “Need me here?”
As good as it feels, it’s not enough. You whine, squeezing your walls together against his fingers. He gets the hint, but teases you further anyway. 
“No? What about here?” He pushes a little deeper. A bit of smirk graces his face and you resist the urge to brazenly spit up at him. “Not there either?” He clicks his tongue once, as if stumped on where you need him. 
“Kai,” you try again. Your body sweats as you near your high. His name comes out mangled and weak. 
“Ah, I know now. You need my cock, is that right?” Your heart skips a beat at the vulgar term falling from his lips. “That’s it. You want me to fill you up completely. You need me pressed up close as I thrust into you, hm?” You whine more. He removes his fingers from your heat to rub on your clit again. “You want me to make you come, so that I glide so easily in and out of you? So that I can fit you so tightly, you can’t even remember your name?” He licks a stripe up your neck, then nips at your earlobe. “I’ve got you, baby. I’ve got you.” Kai pauses, pulling your skirt and panties down to your ankles, then immediately removing his own clothes, too. He holds himself in one hand while using the other to bring you back to the edge. You squeeze your eyes shut, pleasure overwhelming your body. “That’s it, c’mon. You’re doing so well. So close.”
“Kai,” you mutter, feeling him on your leg again. You clench around his fingers, but he lets you this time. Curse words spill from your lips as you reach your high. His name slips in between the strings of profanities, making his heart race a little more each time. He can’t wait to be inside you and fill you up the minute you’re ready. 
“You okay?”
“Mhm.”
“Need a moment?”
“No. I need you.”
He smirks, then positions himself in front of you, teasing your folds with his tip. “That’s my girl.” Kai leans forward to distract you with a kiss as he pushes into you. You moan into his mouth at the feeling, but there’s no pain. He made sure you’d be wet enough, and now, he can be sure you’re comfortable as he has his way with you. “Good?”
 “Yeah.” After a couple starter thrusts, you hook your legs around his waist. “Harder.”
He adjusts just slightly for a deeper angle. “I’ve got you, baby. I’ll fuck you so well your legs will be shaking, how’s that sound?” You giggle with excitement. “Mhm. I’m gonna fill you up, and you’re gonna feel so good. You’ll be dripping by the time I’m done with you. You’d look so beautiful all full and round, and everyone will know what happened and who got you knocked up. You’d be such a good mommy.” Kai pauses, sweat beading on his forehead. You’re not sure what is causing the sudden baby-talk, but you can’t describe the mixed emotions it makes you feel. His tone is full of excitement. His praise makes you feel rich. 
“Kai,” you whine, unsure what to say. 
His focus, though, is clearly elsewhere. “I’m gonna give you a baby, hm? I’m gonna fuck you so well. Fill you up, and stay inside until you’re good and bred, and not gonna pull out til I’m sure it took. How’s that sound?”
You open your mouth to respond, but a deep thrust makes you moan instead. He smiles, entering a pace that suits you both. 
“That’s it, baby. Let go.” His hands hold you still as he buries himself inside your heat. Praises and profanities leave his lips, but your mind is too fuzzy for you to pick them up. You’re close to your high and he knows it, watching the way your breathing gets heavy and your body clenches harder. “C’mon,” he urges, nipping your shoulder again. 
Kai’s vocal and rough most of the time, but never in this way. But ironically, you were just thinking about it’d be like to have a baby with him. You think he’d be a good dad, despite his past; he’d make sure his kid never suffered the way he did. 
“I’m close,” you mutter, spurring him on.
“I know, c’mon. I’m almost there, too.”
A sudden feeling of warmth shoots through your body. A fullness you’ve never felt before. Kai pants against your skin after his own release, but doesn’t slow down until you reach yours. You do, a second later, from the heavenly feeling of his seed inside you. He doesn’t pull out, plugging you up as promised, and revels in the sensation.
For a moment, you stay like that, with his body atop yours and his face buried in your neck. But then you dig your hands in his hair and pull him up to face you. His cheeks are dark red, and a smile brings out his dimples. You bring him in for a kiss, to which he complies, kissing you much more softly than earlier. When you break it off, he rises, sitting up on his knees.
You follow the action, resting your weight on your elbows. You’re still connected, but a little has leaked out from the movement. You watch it, then cock your head at him.
“So what brought this on, huh?”
“Was it too much?” A look of worry overtakes his face, but you reassure him with a shake of your head.
“No, just unexpected. I didn’t know you had that in you. What caused it?”
He hesitates, but then admits what truth he had learned only an hour prior. “Jo’s pregnant.”
You blink in surprise. “What?”
“When she gave me her magic, I could feel it.”
“And that has to do with this… how?”
Upon sensing the new life in his sister’s womb, something spurred within him. Whether it was a need to compete with her - to be the one to produce the coven’s next set of twins - or to prove that he is just as capable of creating and raising a baby, he has no idea. But that moment of realization brought an urge to him immediately. The need to breed you, to make you full, but also, to bring something as definite and permanent into your lives as a baby, to show everyone how much he loves you, that he is capable of love and willing to change. 
A thousand reasons flood his mind, but he isn’t sure how to word any of them. Emotions are still so new to him, it’s a mystery thinking about which ones are appropriate for which situations. 
“I don’t know,” he finally says. 
You understand. Even if he has some idea, he’s clearly not ready to try and explain it. Sometimes, it takes time, but he always reopens the conversation later, when he’s more apt to talk about it. He’s getting much better, the closer you grow. 
“Huh,” you shrug.
He smiles, full of relief. “Huh.”
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kunikukitty · 9 months ago
Text
☆ Always An Artist, Never The Muse
Scaramouche/Wanderer x Fem!reader
ix. beauty of art
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Since when did it started?
You've always been complimented to be a beauty, always been given praises, and you too are confident when it comes to your appearance.
Not to mention, you are also surrounded by good-looking girls such as Mona, Hutao, and Faruzan.
When did it started, when you began to question your own vision and the mirror? Since when were you became so sensitive about your appearance?
Being an artist who desired to be a muse was your ultimate struggle before. And perhaps, even until today.
You never made a portrait of yourself, having more interest in other scenery you see — and never did you became anyone's art inspiration.
To the non-artists, this might not be a thought worth being sad about. You too, you tell yourself it isn't a big deal, yet it persists. There is an ache, a longing to be admired just as how much you used to admire those whom you painted.
You used to be saddened over the fact that no artist chose you— maybe because you are an artist yourself?
However, even after your candle of passion became unlit— even after the spark that used to shine so brightly began to lose its light, you didn't became anyone's object of admiration.
"Don't worry, I'll keep you company."
You heaved a sigh as you heard Capitano utter those words in a reassuring manner, resting your head to the backrest of the bus seat you're sitting on.
He must've sensed your nervousness, also with the fact that he knows what you've been through.
That's the reason why you rejected those other fine art students anyway, since you didn't want to be just become a muse because you're a part of the options.
They were tasked to ask exchange students to be their model for their project. None of them would ask you if you weren't one, and you hated that. Could it be your pride as an artist hovering over your mind, that you wished to be somebody's muse because they specifically chose you and not just because you happened to be there as an option?
And now you were asked again yet for the same situation— you weren't the first choice.
Is this petty? You honestly don't care.
How silly these emotions of yours, hindering you from enjoying being a muse for the first time.
The bus stopped and the two of you exits the ride. You walked with Capitano as he led the way, coming to a halt some minutes later in front of a black gate. He looked at you before hitting the doorbell.
You brought a hand to caress your own face. Your skin isn't exactly clear, though you do not have many blemishes either.
You've always been confident of your appearance, and you didn't know why. Is it because you truly are indeed beautiful, or where you just blinded because of the praises you've heard?
Yet whenever you look in the mirror, you can't help but to see your image turning uglier each second. Is what you see in the mirror what you actually looked like?
You breathed in and out, wanting to mask the nervousness you're feeling. Faruzan is pretty, would the artist be disappointed upon seeing a face inferior to hers—
Forget about that, because you are the one disappointed right now...!
You regretted getting swayed with Faruzan's words. You even asked Mona for an advice to strengthen your decision, and she also said some motivating words similar to Faruzan.
What a load of bullshit, you shouldn't had listened!
Because it's fine, yes, it would be fine.
This trip could've turn out good just as your friends say— if not for the man standing before you! This... is he the artist?
The moment he opened the gate, you glared at him from head to toe, in which he responded with a roll of his eyes, turning his attention to Capitano instead.
The same shade of indigo that ruined your mood at the time you first entered the university, the blind-hater man!
Honestly, you could brush that off as just bad day for both of you which led to a stupid argument, but the bad impression lasted!
Whenever you see him around the campus, there's just this underlying vibes around him that ruins your mood. So even if you both ain't having a conversation, it's as if you are being brought back to that argument and you can't help but to feel the annoyance all over again.
And therefore strengthening the bad impression.
You followed after them as they entered his... kind of a huge house.
Of course, of course. Students at that goddamn university are rich, it's no wonder.
You eyed the interior, a minimalist design yet it looks extravagant due to the high-end materials. High ceilings, big chandeliers— his living room is grand and sophisticated space. The walls are in neutral colors, decorated with many paintings...
Oh.
Are these his works? They are... beautiful.
Not just beautiful, but breathtakingly beautiful.
Every pieces are paintings of abstracts and places, and there are no single painting of an image of a human.
The scenery looks realistic though, are portraits just not his forte? Or maybe he just didn't displayed them.
You got too absorbed at staring at them that Capitano had to tug you forward. His gentle hold brought you out of your reverie, continuing to follow after his friend.
"What even is his name?" You asked in a whisper.
"Oh right, you didn't get to be introduced properly." He nodded at himself, "Scaramouche is his name," then he called his friend's attention, "And she is [Name]."
...That turned awkward, just for you maybe. 'Scaramouche' just nodded his head and so did you.
When he opened another door, you almost drooled at the sight. Because why wouldn't you— it is his very own art studio inside his home! It's huge and definitely pleasing to look at. There are many paintings on the floor and some are hanging over the wall, all of the pieces are masterpiece! There are an unfinished sculpture of a head on one of the tables, charcoal drawings on paper, sketches of anatomy, movable wooden figure, and more.
Despite not liking him, you hold a respect to every artists. Not to mention, one look at his studio and you could tell he is talented...
You had to contain your excitement.
It's not like you're hiding that you are an (ex) artist, but you also do not want to show hints or tell that you are one, especially that you have nothing to show.
You would rather keep it that way, people not having an answer whether you are or not an artist— except for those who already know, of course.
"Pardon me, [Name]." You looked over to Capitano who has an apologetic expression on his face. "There happen to be an emergency, I'll leave you to Scaramouche's care."
You just nodded, Capitano had always been a busy man. You watched as he converse with the said man before he gave you a small wave, walking away.
"Stay here."
'Scaramouche' said, and you were left alone in his very own art studio.
You sat down on a stool, probably the seat he prepared for Faruzan. With a frown, you looked around.
Your heart raced as your eyes met your own pair of eyes, the full length mirror in front of you glinted in an ugly way.
You felt frozen in time. Is it because you would be exposed to an artist's eyes who would look at every detail of your appearance so he could draw it, the reason why you felt so bare in your own vision?
It was as if suddenly, you appear naked in front of everyone— drowning in their uncomfortable stares that ran through your insides.Your skin is getting ripped the more you stare at your own reflection, and you feel so exposed to the point that every nook of your face became visible in your eyes.
Since when this started, really? Where you no longer feel beautiful at every angle, as if your features are becoming distorted.
Ah, right. The people who compliments you are non-artists. You used to be one and yet you never drew yourself, and now you feel so imperfect and full of flaws. Maybe because you're aware of the truth.
Maybe this is why you've only became a muse now of an artist who had no choice but to draw you— you are indeed pretty, just not pretty enough that people wants to keep looking at you.
An art is supposed to be beautiful in every way, a masterpiece people enjoy looking at.
You, are not a piece worth staring at.
You are not designed to be a muse in the first place— and you no longer had the skills to paint.
Everyone is either an artist or the art, so now, where do you stand?
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note. im back yippiiieeee hello yall ^^
taglist. @veekoko @aeongiies @featuredtofu @kodzusmiles @magica-ren @feiherp @beriiov @hiraethhv @kleej @eutopiastar @keiiqq @bananasquash @kuniisvt (i cant tag those in bold ;(()
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melodic-haze · 9 months ago
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YK HOW CLORINDES BUTTON IS FIGHTING FOR ITS LIFE ON HER UNIFORM RIGHT. Then imagine reader noticing it and just tearing it apart and suck her tits. That’s a need fr 🤤
☆ — DEMO TRACK: sub!Clorinde x dom!Reader
☆ — TYPE: NSFW
☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: Nipple obsession 🫶, she gets kinda perved on a lil bit but that's just people looking at her and her whoreass fit like!!! What!!!!!!!, idk what else ngl
☆ — NOTES: Dude how the fuck do her clothes even work. Like I've been staring at it for a while now like what. How???? Anyway it's 1 am sorry if it isn't coherent
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Clorinde's buttons are fighting for their lives and so am I
"Appropriate uniform" my nonexistent left NUT how the HELL!!! Is that allowed!!!!!!!
No but seriously it must be such a struggle to watch her walk around like that. Like what. What why what
You couldn't help but stare at your lover's chest—more specifically, her button-up that was practically struggling to hold on.
"..Clorinde?"
She lifts her head to look at you with a light smile on her face, temporarily pausing her movement to put on her shoes, "Yes, my dear?"
You cleared your throat as you leaned on the wall, looking at your eyes still locked onto that same spot, "Do you not get.. you know, a clothing violation or something?"
"Why?" She tilted her head in what is indesputably, undeniably real confusion, "I do not see why I would."
She probably feels it though. Or at least you'd assume so, with how tight her clothes seem to be on her.
"..Nothing. Just, um," you scratched the nape of your neck sheepishly before shaking your head and forcing your eyes on her own, "good luck at work today."
She nods and says her goodbyes before leaving out the door.
Hm.
When you're outside, for some reason you can't help but notice that people are staring at her awfully lot!! It could be because like she's the Champion Duellist so obvs they'd be in awe.........but it doesn't seem like they're in awe for that reason, with the way they look at her restricted chest when they're close enough. Is it just today that they're noticing this?? Or is it just today that YOU'RE noticing them looking at her??????
Whatever it is, it's pissing you off a little (a lot)!!! She has the audacity to say she doesn't know what you're on about when she's being gawked at bc of the same reason YOU were gawking at her for
By the time the day ends you're about to lose it (I would personally 🫶) so you're waiting in your room for her before she comes back, all oblivious to the MANY stares she's had and the. Wardrobe malfunction that was going on there. The moment she gets back, dude POUNCE HER because I fuckin would 😭😭😭
Don't give her time to even think of anything—not like she'll need the time, she'd abandon all trains of thought for once the moment you're both in the mood. Kiss her HARD, she'll happily let you and your tongue lead like a familiar dance between the two of you
What ISN'T familiar, though, is when you grasp onto the opening part of her button-up and tug on it. And not tug on it normally like you would to suggest that she takes her clothes off, nonononono I mean FORCING IT TO SPLIT
She breaks the kiss to ask you what you're doing and that you're putting a LOT of force into-- OH SHIT IT POPPED OPEN!!!! The buttons didn't really need any encouraging by that point but with your help it popped off to god knows where 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️ but colour her SURPRISED she did NOT expect you to do that
Or did she
Anyway she's quite literally about to complain to you, saying that that was her clothes you JUST ripped open what the heck!!!! But then you kinda easily shut her up the moment you tug her bra down and start paying attention to her tits
Bite em hard, suck em real nice and leave a VERY obvious mark on them so that she thinks twice about wearing things that will DEFINITELY expose her at any given minute. Play with her nipples too, and don't forget to give attention to the neglected side❗️❗️
She'll shut up real quick if you pay SOOO much attention to them, pulling you in even further via holding your head closer to you. She'll even comb your hair too, if you have any :3 though she might accidentally tug on them if you do smth that particularly gives her a shock lol
Atp rip her tights for access too, she won't even care anymore now that you've ripped her shirt open 🤷‍♀️ she says she has more anyway what's one loss gonna do?? Rip it and massage her clit as you don't stop spoiling her breasts, sucking them as if something's gonna come out if you persevere hard enough, and I promise she'll be breathing so fucking heavily as she begs you for more. More of what? She can't even clarify, the ever so composed Duellist is at an utter loss!!!!!
Plunge your fingers in and you can feel how wet she is, how Easily your fingers just slip into her and move in and out, how her folds practically flutter around your digits from every lick and suck of her nipples like a bitch starved AND possessed
If you curl your fingers a certain way and suck on her tits at the same time too???? Oh FUCK you're ripping out SUCH a huge orgasm from her that has her bucking her hips and grinding them into your palm and you need to fuck her through it!!!! Fuck her through her high and bring her down......and even after that she kinda don't gaf if she's absolutely dirtied her attire atp or made a mess as she drags you off for more, hat probably on the ground and forgotten
She'd care when you're like DONE done though, with her sighing in such a way that you do feel like you should probably help bc you DID still rip her shit apart 😭
But yeah dude everyone can stare all they want but only YOU get the privilege of going feral and tearing her clothes apart just to touch her and taste her in any way you can. Mark her up so that underneath her clothing, as embarrassing as they are, are all the proof that everything under the fabric?? That's all for you babe 🙏🙏
It was the day after, and you were looking at her and her clothing once again.. along with everyone else's looks on her, once again more filled with a mix of filtered lust and quite a bit of jealousy from some of the women due to how form-fitting her attire was.
She did say that she'll make a note to buy some looser versions of her outfit, but...
At the end of the day, it was Clorinde's decision to wear what she wants to wear. And it's not like it's ever hindered her work before—if anything, the fact that it's the way it is probably helps with her mobility somehow, especially when such a chest is sure to be a nuisance when she moves around so much.
..You can't really help but feel a bit jealous of your girlfriend, though. Or maybe possessive?maybe, but such a word feels like you want her all to yourself.
(You do, but still.)
But then you realise that maybe such worries are unfounded after all, especially when you overhear someone speaking of a dark mark on her neck, which she describes as a nasty bite on patrol.
You know it wasn't some random bite though, and it seems that she knows full well she's lying, especially when she sees you and gives you a small smile before pretending to scratch her neck to reveal that dark mark you had inflicted.
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cabinofimagines · 1 year ago
Text
Tradition
I know we said to request only platonic stuff but I could not help myself. Therefore, requested by me to myself, I am writing a romantic poly!solangelo fic. They keep coming and they don't stop coming- Pairing: Will Solace x reader x Nico di Angelo, Poly!Solangelo x reader Request: none Word count: 1.6k Warnings: None! -Asnyox
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A lot of demigods have lost people and places dear to them, it was nothing new for a lot of the faces you saw during the holidays. Yet, it was hard to get used to losing things. 
You missed the time you spent at home. Of course, you loved camp, you loved your friends, but every time the holidays came around you felt homesick to a place you would never return to. The worst part was remembering the specific traditions you used to have with your parent - and knowing that you wouldn’t get to do those this year again. You often go through this period fine, a little high strung sometimes but with your friends, and boyfriends, on your side you would get distracted enough to only get sad when you’re alone. 
And it felt wrong to celebrate the holidays without your traditions, it felt weird to bring up your traditions and it was simply hard to communicate what you wanted. Maybe you wanted to be back home, never having known demigod life, or maybe you just wanted a hug and baked a specific recipe you used to make every year, or see your living room decorated specifically like it used to be. 
Either way, the holidays come and go every year and it seems that today was simply the day that your brain decided to be sad and homesick. Thus, you figured you would just spend some time wallowing in your misery on your own instead of bringing down the general mood around camp. Maybe a part of your reasoning was that the more happy atmosphere of camp would simply make you sadder and feel worse. 
However, your boyfriend seemed to have a different idea. You see, your sour mood around the holidays didn’t go unnoticed by your lovers, as you seemed to close off a little more each day from them. Nico especially wanted to make the holidays a bit special. In the previous years, before he stayed at camp year round, the holidays had always been tinted by grief and sadness. He barely remembered how he used to celebrate when his mother and Bianca were still around, but Will and you had slowly been giving him new hope. Perhaps, with the two of you on his side, he could slowly move on, and one of the steps he wanted to take was to rejuvenate his energy around Christmas. Therefore he had made some plans for the three of you.
“I’m not really in the mood to go out today, Nico.” you looked away from your boyfriend, “I’m sorry,” 
“Please?” Nico wasn’t one to beg, but he really wanted to spend time with you, “Will’s already in my cabin.” he offered as he held out his hand to you.
“I don’t want to bring your mood down,” you explained, but you slowly took his hand anyway, unable to tell him no. 
“That’s fine,” Nico grinned a little, “If there is anyone who would bring the mood down it would be me and you know it.” Then his face flushed a little, “besides, it wouldn’t be the holidays without my family.” 
“Your family?” you asked before, softly, “oh,” Your heart stammered, he had meant you and Will as his family, you looked at him fondly, “I love you, Nico.” You stepped closer before softly sharing a kiss with him.
When you finally entered the Hades cabin you didn’t notice much to be off. Will was laying on Nico’s bed, with his feet still on the floor. You sat next to him, putting your hand on his hair. Will smiled at you. 
“Nico got you out of your cabin?” Will asked, grabbing the hand that was on his hair and pressing a kiss to the palm as you hummed. 
“He had some rather good arguments,” you elaborated, “like loving me, and loving you.” 
“I didn’t take for our sunshine to be a poet,” Will sat up as Nico sat down beside him. They kissed softly, “But your talents are uncountable,” Will finished his sentence as he broke away. Nico had a blush on his face as he stared at his boyfriend. 
As you sat there for a moment in silence you realized that for a moment the never ending sadness you had felt the past few days had gone, chased away by simply being near your boyfriends. Perhaps you should note down that your loved ones would make you feel better, as much as loved ones could also make you ache. You shuffled your body closer to Will’s, and felt his warmth against your side. 
“So what’s the plan?” You asked, looking at Nico as he came out of his little daze. 
“Well, I thought maybe,” he hesitated for a second, the slightest sliver of doubt in his mind, “that we might celebrate the holidays with the three of us. As in, we make our own tradition?” he suggested, and Will nodded slowly. 
“My mom and I used to write each other small poems,” Will said, “Or I guess songs, sort of, each year.” Will then smiled softly, “Well, we still do. She sends them in the mail and I use Hermes Express to get mine wherever she is. It’s a small way we communicate. Although, the three of us don’t have to do that, it’s honestly a bit private for me.” Will admitted. 
“Did you have any traditions, Nico?” You asked. 
Nico shrugged slowly, “I don’t remember a lot, and never really had a celebration since coming to camp.” Then he flushed slightly, “I used to go to McDonalds, and simply get a festive meal.” 
“Festive?” Will poked Nico’s side, “What, do they add Christmas lights to it?” Nico shook his head. 
“No, but the people there,” he sighed, “I suppose I just sought out the energy, okay?”
“You’re cute,”  you told him, leaning over Will to kiss Nico’s cheek. On your way back Will grabbed your cheek and pressed a kiss to it.  
“What about you?” Will let your face go. You thought about it for a moment, but it didn’t take long  as you had been sitting with these feelings for a while. 
“There wasn’t much outside the standard things-” you sighed, “I suppose for us what mattered most was to spend the time together.” after another beat you resumed, “I mean, we always made a dessert together but the recipe changed every year,” you laughed at the memory, “we really should’ve written it down somewhere. I don’t even remember the name.” 
Nico perked up a little, “Do you remember the ingredients?” but you shook your head. 
“I only remember the taste when the nectar tastes like it,” You leaned on Will’s shoulder, “Which isn’t always.” 
“Well, we can just bake a different dessert each year until we find it, starting now.” Will suggested and you rolled your eyes, “That would take ages,” you objected, but Nico ignored you.
“Where will we bake?” Nico asked, “Last time I checked anything that could serve as a kitchen here is a bit off-limits.”
“I’m pretty sure Leo can give us something to work with.” Will said, and you felt the trembles of his voice through his chest. 
“What, he’ll let us bake on top of him? He’ll lay still for twenty minutes?” You joked. 
“No, we’ll lock him in a small, metal box until the food is cooked,” Nico said and you laughed. 
Nonetheless, after you made your way to Bunker Nine it only took Leo half an hour to have a baking station set up, with the condition that he would also get a part of the dessert. 
“And kisses?” He puckered his lips, and as you stepped towards him, Nico was faster, pressing a rock he had on hand to Leo’s mouth. Leo backed away, as he grimaced. 
“Hey! That’s unhygienic!” he objected, but Nico just smiled widely. 
“I dunno, stones are rather tasty if you ask me.” Nico put the rock on the table.
“Yeah, you need minerals in your diet Leo.” Will chimed in from next to you. Leo looked unimpressed as he waved you off. 
“I’ll be somewhere on the other side working on Festus, just make sure to call me when your dessert is ready.” 
And as you had limited resources - even Leo couldn’t magic all the ingredients from his workshop, and the Stolls only had a small stash of possibilities (that you could afford) - the dessert you made was rather simple. But that didn’t matter, even though for sure it was not what you used to make, it was special. Not perfect, and it still hurt, but keeping your traditions, carrying them over to your new life, it was special. And you knew you would keep doing it - keep carrying that which you got taught by previous family and friends, all because you loved them and they loved you. You’ll unconsciously carry them with you, their deeds and only when you miss them will you notice the print they left on you. But for now, keeping traditions from nostalgic times was all you needed to remember that even if there are people you no longer can meet, they will always stay with you. 
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cinnamonest · 11 months ago
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not too sure if you've already put thought into it, but which yanderes would be/wouldn't be willing to break bones? i feel like for most of them it's a hard yes but depending on the circumstances and their mental fragility.
also sadisim. (COUGHCOUGHCHILDECOUGHCOUGH)
ignore this ask if you've already answered/have a question similar to this (or just don't want to answer/! and if your reqs are closed and my tumblrs just tweaking that's okay too!!
I would say Albedo initially, but he's a practical man, if you're not going to be using the limbs anyway might as well just take them off, so… as for some others…
Kazuha does it for practicality, specifically your ankles. It's a useful risk prevention method.
He still feels bad, and he apologizes… but he doesn't hesitate much. After all, he did give you fair warning, but you ran off yet again. This is just to keep you safe, for your own well-being, and for his peace of mind.
He's sweet about it too. He puts your hand against his arm beforehand, and tells you here, you can squeeze down on my arm, okay? After all, it will help with the initial pain.
He's still sweet when you squirm away and whimper, even though the grip with which he pulls you back is harsh.
I know. But I can't let you be a danger to yourself…
He holds you gently for however long it takes you to stop crying. He'll get you water and food and painkillers/alcohol, tends to your every need, waits on you hand and (broken) foot. Notably, once the initial reaction has died down, he stops really acknowledging it in any meaningful way, talks to you as if everything is normal. Even when addressing your leg, he talks about it as if it were some injury you acquired by other means.
You might be spiteful enough to bring it up and remind him that it's his fault, but he's quick to correct you, keeping a soft voice and gentle smile all the while.
You did have every opportunity to choose otherwise, you know. Ah, but I know you're upset… it's okay if you blame me.
He'll be fully patient for you to heal, too. He’s very cheerful once it's fully healed, says he's glad you're better, helps you walk around a bit to get readjusted, keeping his hands firmly supporting you the entire time. Even for a while after it's healed enough to walk, he checks on it from time to time to ensure the final stages of mending are going well.
He tells you you're fully healed, with a soft voice and ever-pleasant smile, not without adding—
Let’s hope it stays that way.
----
Childe has to be in a more angry mood than usual to get to that point. Usually, his form of sadism is the sort that focuses on a sort of pleasure-pain, the sort he can get off to… but this is a bit different.
It's only because you keep being irritating. He's really tolerant, you know? He's been so lenient, he tells you, he's been so nice, he's been so good to you, and what do you do? You keep being mean. It's cute up to a certain point, but you're being like, really really mean.
It's actually kind of nice, on his end, to see your immediate reaction — you can tell just by the strained smile and clenched teeth as he speaks that you've crossed some sort of line. For once, you actually shrink back, clutch your hands up at your chest defensively, start to take some steps back… but you can't get away fast enough before you're drug forward by the hair or neck.
Come on… it's not that hard to be good, is it?
It's a last chance — he's nice enough to give you that, at least, even if you don't deserve it (which you don't, he thinks). Come on. You can be good, you can apologize and submit and he'll forget all the spiteful shit you've done today and then you can have a nice, happy rest of the day. You can do it. It should be easy. He takes one of your hands in his, holding it with a sort of sincere pleading gesture.
But, even though you should know better, you still remain spiteful through your fear, narrow your eyes and tell him no. You try to jerk your hand away, only to find his grip on it is iron-firm.
His smile twitches.
Aw. That's too bad.
And thus, you process the sound and sight before the pain — you see him take your hand and twist it, hear the snap, and only then does the pain shoot up through your wrist, through your arm and to every nerve in your body. It's bad enough that you fall to your knees, squealing, cradling the now-unnaturally-twisted limb.
Yes, he's very very nice, but admittedly, hearing you wail like that is rather pleasing, all things considered. More so when he grabs you by the jaw, jerks your head up to force you to look at him, and sees the tears in your eyes, the way your face contorts with pain.
Maybe you can be good now…?
This time, you squeeze your eyes shut, frantically nodding your head, a pitiful little sound coming out of your throat. He'd be lying if he said it wasn't very satisfying.
---
There's also a notable difference between willing to break bones and likelihood of breaking bones, actively willing or not.
Some non-humans are particularly unaware of their strength — Xiao fits this well. He genuinely doesn't like hurting you, although you would think so, based on how much he does, it's just that he forgets how fragile you are. For someone of his strength, your body might as well be made of glass.
So it just sort of happens… he grabs you by the arm or leg and pulls in the wrong direction a bit too hard, there's a stomach-churning snapping sound and suddenly you're shrieking and crying. It startles him quite a bit — he lets go and shrinks back, all wide-eyed and head darting from side to side as he looks around in confused panic.
But just as with fragility, he's also not very aware of the durability of the human body. He’s not great at gauging severity of injury — normally, he just attacks creatures until they stop moving, because that's his goal when it comes to his responsibilities.
So he has no real reference for how much damage he's done. Bones are all connected, yes? He probably broke something important, or made some internal organ come apart somehow, and it will kill you. The thought sends him into a full-fledged panic, he's bolting off and dragging help back as fast as physically possible, explaining that you have sustained mortal injury and are on the verge of death.
He's at least comforted to learn that that is in fact not the case, and you have merely broken your arm, which, the innkeeper confirms, is in fact not fatal. He's too relieved to notice the blatant frustration in her voice (this marks the fourth time he's insisted you are about to die over something actually far more trivial), and merely nods when she asks to please be more careful.
He doesn't really know how to handle the matter from there. He feels guilty about it. You're obviously in pain, and it's his fault. He'll sit next to you, hunched over and staring with those big yellow eyes as if trying to make you heal faster with sheer willpower. Makes sure you don't get up and move around (despite your insistence that your legs are just fine — still can't take risks, he says), disappears for a while each day and comes back with mountaintop herbs that are supposed to dull pain.
He doesn't outright say sorry, but you can see the remorse on his face and in his actions, and it's actually kind of pitiful… it reminds you of a little kid that broke a vase sheepishly trying to put it back together… all in all, you can't really bring yourself to be harsh about it.
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jennamoran · 1 year ago
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The Far Roofs: Systems
Hi!
Today I’m going to talk a little bit more about my forthcoming RPG, the Far Roofs. More specifically, I want to give a general overview of its game mechanics!
So the idea that first started the Far Roofs on the road to being its own game came out of me thinking a lot about what large projects feel like.
I was in one of those moods where I felt like the important thing in an RPG system was the parallel between that system and real-world experience. Where I felt like the key to art was always thinking about the end goal, or at least a local goal, as one did the work; and, the key to design was symmetry between the goals and methods, the means and ends.
I don't always feel that way, but it's how I work when I'm feeling both ambitious and technical.
So what I wanted to do was come up with an RPG mechanic that was really like the thing it was simulating:
Finding answers. Solving problems. Doing big things.
And it struck me that what that felt like, really, was a bit like ...
You get pieces over time. You wiggle them around. You try to fit them together. Sometimes, they fit together into larger pieces and then eventually a whole. Sometimes you just collect them and wiggle them around until suddenly there's an insight, an oh!, and you now know everything works.
The ideal thing to do here would probably be having a bag of widgets that can fit together in different ways---not as universally as Legos or whatever, but, like, gears and connectors and springs and motors and whatever. If I were going to be building a computer game I would probably think along those lines, anyway. You'd go to your screen of bits and bobs and move them around with your mouse until it hooked together into something that you liked.
... that's not really feasible for a tabletop RPG, though, at least, not with my typical financial resources. I could probably swing making that kind of thing, finding a 3d printing or woodworking partner or something to make the pieces, for the final kickstarter, but I don't have the resources to make a bunch of different physical object sets over time while I'm playtesting.
So the way I decided that I could implement this was by drawing letter tiles.
That I could do a system where you'd draw letter tiles ... not constantly, not specifically when you were working, but over time; in the moments, most of all, that could give you insight or progress.
Then, at some point, you'd have enough of them.
You'd see a word.
That word'd be your answer.
... not necessarily the word itself, but, like, what the word means to you and what the answer means to you, those would be the same.
The word would be a symbol for the answer that you've found, as a player and a character.
(The leftover letters would then stick around in your hand, bits of thought and experience that didn't directly lead to a solution there, but might help with something else later on.)
Anyway, I figured that this basic idea was feasible because, like, lots of people own Scrabble sets. Even if you don't, they're easier to find than sets of dice!
For a short indie game focused on just that this would probably have been enough of a mechanic all on its own. For a large release, though, the game needed more.
After thinking about it I decided that what it wanted was two more core resolution systems:
One, for stuff like, say ... kickstarter results ... where you're more interested in "how well did this do?" or "how good of an answer is this?" than in whether those results better fit AXLOTL or TEXTUAL. For this, I added cards, which you draw like letter tiles and combine into poker hands. A face card is probably enough for a baseline success, a pair of Kings would make the results rather exciting, and a royal flush result would smash records.
The other core system was for like ... everyday stuff. For starting a campfire or jumping a gap. That, by established RPG tradition, would use dice.
...
I guess technically it didn't have to; I mean, like, most of my games have been diceless, and in fact we've gotten to a point in the hobby where that's just "sort of unusual" instead of actually rare.
But, like, I like dice. I do. If I don't use them often, it's because I don't like the empty page of where to start in the first place building a bespoke diced system when I have so many good diceless systems right there.
... this time, though, I decided to just go for it.
--
The Dice System
So a long, long time ago I was working on a game called the Weapons of the Gods RPG. Eos Press had brought me in to do the setting, and somewhere in the middle of that endeavor, the game lost its system.
I only ever heard Eos' side of this, and these days I tend to take Eos' claims with a grain of salt ... but, my best guess is that all this stuff did happen, just, with a little more context that I don't and might not ever know?
Anyway, as best as I remember, the first writer they had doing their system quit midway through development. So they brought in a newer team to do the system, and halfway through that the team decided they'd have more fun using the system for their own game, and instead wrote up a quick alternate system for Weapons of the Gods to use.
This would have been fine if the alternate system were any good, but it was ... pretty obviously a quick kludge. It was ...
I think the best word for it would be "bad."
I don't even like the system they took away to be their own game, but at least I could believe that it was constructed with love. It was janky but like in a heartfelt way.
The replacement system was more the kind of thing where if you stepped in it you'd need a new pair of shoes.
It upset me.
It upset me, and so, full wroth, I decided to write a system to use for the game.
Now, I'd never done a diced system before at that point. My only solo game had been Nobilis. So I took a bunch of dice and started rolling them, to see ... like ... what the most fun way of reading them was.
Where I landed, ultimately, was looking for matches.
The core system for Weapons of the Gods was basically, roll some number of d10s, and if you got 3 4s, that was a 34. If you got 2 9s, that was a 29. If your best die was a 7 and you had no pairs at all, you got 1 7. 17.
It didn't have any really amazing statistical properties, but the act of rolling was fun. It was rhythmic, you know, you'd see 3 4s and putting them together into 34 was a tiny tiny dopamine shot at the cost of basically zero brain effort. It was pattern recognition, which the brain tends to enjoy.
I mean, obviously, it would pall in a few minutes if you just sat there rolling the dice for no reason ... but, as far as dice rolling goes, it was fun.
So when I went to do an optional diced system for the Chuubo's Marvelous Wish-Granting Engine RPG, years later, to post here on tumblr ... I already knew what would make that roll fun. That is, rolling a handful of dice and looking for matches.
What about making it even more fun?
... well, critical results are fun, so what about adding them and aiming to have a lot of them, though still like rare enough to surprise?
It made sense to me to call no matches at all a critical failure, and a triple a critical success. So I started fiddling with dice pool size to get the numbers where I wanted them.
I'm reconstructing a bit at this point, but I imagine that I hit 6d10 and was like: "these are roughly the right odds, but this is one too many dice to look at quickly on the table, and I don't like that critical failure would be a bit more common than crit success."
So after some wrestling with things I wound up with a dice pool of 5d6, which is the dice pool I'm still using today.
If you roll 5d6, you'll probably get a pair. But now and then, you'll get a triple (or more!) My combinatorics is rusty, so I might have missed a case, but, like ... 17% of the time, triples, quadruples, or quintuples? And around 9% chance, for no matches at all?
I think I was probably looking for 15% and 10%, that those were likely my optimum, but ... well, 5d6 comes pretty close. Roughly 25% total was about as far as I thought I could push critical results while still having them feel kind or rare. Like ...
If I'm rolling a d20 in a D&D-like system, and if I'm going to succeed on an 18+, that's around when success is exciting, right? Maybe 17+, though that's pushing it? So we want to fall in the 15-20% range for a "special good roll." And people have been playing for a very long time now with the 5% chance of a "1" as a "special bad roll," and that seemed fine, so, like, 20-25% chance total is good.
And like ...
People talk a lot about Rolemaster crit fail tables in my vicinity, and complain about the whiff fests you see in some games where you keep rolling and rolling and nothing good or bad actually happens, and so I was naturally drawn to pushing crit failure odds a bit higher than you see in a d20-type game.
Now, one way people in indie circles tend to address "whiff fests" is by rethinking the whole dice-rolling ... paradigm ... so you never whiff; setting things up, in short, so that every roll means something, and every success and failure mean something too.
It's a leaner, richer way of doing things than you see in, say, D&D.
... I just didn't feel like it, here, because the whole point of things was to make dice rolling fun. I wanted people coming out of traditional games to be able to just pick up the dice and say "I'm rolling for this!" because the roll would be fun. Because consulting the dice oracle here, would be fun.
So in the end, that was the heart of it:
A 5d6 roll, focusing on the ease of counting matches and the high but not exorbitant frequency of special results.
But at the same time ...
I'm indie enough that I do really like rolls where, you know, every outcome is meaningful. Where you roll, and there's never a "whiff," just a set of possible meaningful outcomes.
A lot of the time, where I'm leaning into "rolls are fun, go ahead and roll," what it means to succeed, to fail, to crit, all that's up to the group, and sometimes it'll be unsatisfying. Other times, you'll crit succeed or crit fail and the GM will give you basically the exact same result as you'd have gotten on a regular success or failure, just, you know, jazzing up the description a bit with more narrative weight.
But I did manage to pull out about a third of the rolls you'll wind up actually making and assign strong mechanical and narrative weight to each outcome. Where what you were doing was well enough defined in the system that I could add some real meat to those crits, and even regular success and regular failure.
... though that's a story, I think, to be told some other time. ^_^
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nanaminokanojo · 7 months ago
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BAD NEWS (part 61)
-just when you thought you were over your humongous crush on your older brother’s best friend, geto suguru, you couldn’t have been more dead wrong, except satoru doesn’t like suguru for you because he knows his kind all too well: a huge ass playboy who breaks hearts like he changes socks. but you think, MAYBE you’ll be the exception…maybe not.
CHARACTERS: drummer!geto suguru x you/afab reader | gojo satoru | various jjk characters
GENRE: full-length smau + prose | band au | college au | stupid pining | aged-up characters | friends to lovers (?) | smut
TW/CW: strong/mature language | adult content so mdni on some parts | mentions of alcohol, drugs | mentions of cheating, promiscuity, mild dubcon, etc. | god-awful pet names | toxic behavior | will add more if something arises
MASTERLIST | CHAPTER INDEX
<<prev part 61 next>>
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You wished on all the forces of the universe to remove you from your current predicament. Have the floor swallow you whole, for the roof to cave in, make you disappear. Anything, any second now. But nothing. The universe isn't on your side, not this time. And you continued to stand between the counter and Suguru, gnawing at your lower lip so much, it's probably bleeding. All the while, you kept your eyes away from his unrelenting stare, fixing your eyes on the silver skull pendant that hung below his collar.
Suguru patiently stood his ground before you, not saying anything as time ticked by one agonizing second at a time. You can hear his every breath, fanning over your forehead. One minute movement and you'll be touching him. Not a good idea considering everything that happened. But it looked like there was no escaping this time.
Squaring your shoulders, you dared to meet his gaze, but you immediately shrunk back to your awkward state, except the words were already leaving your mouth before you could stop them. "You wanted to talk?" you croaked, your confidence dying in your throat when you saw the frustration dancing in his eyes.
Despite that, he was gentle in his approach. "That's what I said, kitten."
Or so you thought, regretting your next words. "C-can you um..." You motioned for him to move back, but he shook his head at you much to your chagrin.
"No. I don't think that's necessary."
You shrugged, sulking as you shifted your weight to your left leg. If he wasn't going to let you have your space, you can make it difficult for him, too. "Fine." You folded your arms over your chest, a satisfied smirk drawing itself across your lips when he slightly moved back at the action. "Talk about what, Suguru?"
His expressions were unreadable as he paused, evidently testing the waters. "Looks like I'm jumping all the hoops today, but I'll indulge you." He leveled his face to yours, mouth stretching into a grin. "Let's talk about that Sunday night you came home drunk. Particularly the part where you and I –"
"Okay, okay, I get it!" You were covering his mouth with your hand before he could finish, giving him a heavy look which he returned with one of understanding before you withdrew. You let out a loud exhale, feeling your knees go weak at the thought that the matter hangs between the two of you for discussion. You weren't ready, but you had to be if either of you are going to be okay with each other again without you evading him all the time regardless of how things would go.
You looked at him sheepishly. "Do you have to be this close though?"
He rolled his eyes at you. "You're not going anywhere this time, sweetheart."
Curse him for knowing you too well. "You're too close –"
"Getting shy with me now? Thought you wanted me this close." He arched a brow at you, getting in that pushy mood you disliked when directed at you.
"When did I say that?"
"Do you want specifics?"
"Now, you're just being exasperating." You did an eye roll which made him chuckle, but you were having none of his geniality. Instead, you pouted at him. "What about it, anyway?" you mumbled.
Suguru scoffed, the sound coming out with a little laughter of disbelief. "Did you seriously just ask me that, kitten?" He had taken a softer tone on you despite himself. "So, it's a trifling matter to you?"
You sighed. Talking about such things was hell on earth. You've taken drastic measures before just to avoid it, but he seems done with your nonsense. Suddenly, you felt tired, finally letting go of your guard and resting your forehead on his chest, prompting him to stand upright. You've always sought his familiar warmth without inhibitions, and you found comfort in the way he held you.
"That's not what I meant. It's nothing I can trifle with, as you put it. You're not someone I can just take for granted, and you know that."
"Y/N, that's exactly why I wanted to talk about it," he told you. "You're very important to me, too, and I don't want this to become the reason we fall apart."
The sincerity in his tone made you feel a little guilty although you knew it wasn't the intention. Suguru may have his flaws, some of which pissed you off terribly, but you can never deny that he cared for you, first, as Satoru's best friend, and second, as an actual friend to you. Your antics after what happened, something you even initiated, wasn't a good look, but you still felt like countering him on that despite the looming possibility of his words.
Stepping back a bit, you met his gaze, quickly regretting it when you saw just how intensely he was looking at you. But you leveled with him, all your unspoken feelings for him coming up to the surface and pretty much making your self-control crumble. He just held so much power over you, and he didn't even know it.
"Why does it have to make us fall apart?" you asked.
"Because..." He moved closer to you, large hands landing on your hips as he effortlessly lifted you up onto the counter, making you yelp and smack him on the arm from being startled. He chuckled as he stood before you, eyes lighting up as you pouted when he booped your nose. "You have a knack for avoiding things you don't want to deal with, better than you avoid your opponents on the field."
"I do not!" you protested, but it was met with a wry smile.
"Really now, kitten?" he challenged. "You managed to avoid me even in this house. Thought I wouldn't notice you sneaking out in the morning? Or how you made Megumi come here the day later just so you won't have to face me?" He feigned hurt but was unsuccessful in concealing the sly glint in his eyes and the slight upward twitch of his lips. "I made you hangover soup, you know."
You shrugged, feeling your face grow hot. "I'm sorry, okay?" you snapped, but the fight in you has long cooled down. "I just..."
"Yes, kitten?"
"I didn't know what to do about it," you mumbled. "I needed to think."
"And?"
You looked at him with narrowed eyes, silently considering what to say, and maybe you should be bolder like all those girls who pretty much got what they wanted from him one way or the other albeit momentarily. You weren't going to be one of them, were you? Come to think of it, he wouldn't even be around if the thought didn't bother him, would he? You just weren't sure in what manner, but you were going to make sure you weren't going to end up getting the short end of the stick.
Looking back to that night, he didn't force you into anything, even trying to stop you, but if this whole affair with him was one-sided, he wouldn't have done anything to cross that line with you at present and even a year ago.
"Does it bother you?" you asked him instead.
"Yes..." It was his turn to be uncertain and awkward. "Somehow, it does."
Huh, you thought, pushing further. "In what sense?"
"If you're asking if I regret it, kitten, I don't, and neither do I feel sorry in general save for the fact that you weren't clear in the head when it happened. I feel like I've taken advantage of you –"
"Okay, stop. I knew what I was doing, Suguru. I'm not exactly a kid you're supposed to babysit regardless of how you view me," you countered.
"Hmm. How exactly do I view you, Y/N?"
"Oh, I don't know. Your best friend's kid sister?"
Suguru arched a brow at you. "That's always been your opinion about me, sweetheart. I never said that. Otherwise, I wouldn't..." He let his words trail off as if he caught himself, but was hiding it under the guise of not wanting to state specifics.
You chuckled without mirth. "Do you realize what you're saying right now?"
His eyes went dark as he pushed his tongue against his cheek, jaw ticking as he ran his ring-adorned fingers through his hair in utter frustration. "Believe it or not, I do."
You faked a gasp, thrilled to your toes at his little revelation and deciding to make him 'jump the hoops' as he put it earlier. "My, my. My brother's best friend has the hots for me? Who would have known?"
"Y/N..." He sighed. "Kitten, don't say it like that. You make it sound like I'm some creep who stole your virtue."
You scoffed playfully. "You're the one acting like a damn virgin here since earlier. Now, I feel like the creep who stole yours."
"What?" He looked so appalled at your words that it was comical and you couldn't help giggling at his expression. "You little –"
"You're cute when you're flustered."
He rolled his eyes at you, but couldn't help but join in your laughter anyway. And as if nothing happened, you're back to being your silly selves around each other again. Or so it seemed in that moment which easily broke when he spoke again.
"So...did you dislike it?" he asked cautiously, looking at you from under his lashes. He sounded hopeful, and you couldn't help but think if he was ever any degree of vulnerable around anybody else.
"I don't know. I was drunk, remember?" you decided to bait him, and he bit it, making a face at you. You laughed even more at that.
"I'm serious, kitten." Suguru inched closer and closer, eyes hazy as he looked into yours, and you didn't even realize he was already standing between your thighs.
Shoot your shot, you thought to yourself, only hoping you won't regret it, but it seemed like a problem for future you. "I believe I made it clear just how I felt about it."
"Mhmm." His reponse was shaky at best, and you loved that you had this effect on him, too. "I can show you more, kitten," he whispered, lips almost touching yours, his piercing gaze daring you to make the next move as they shifted to your mouth ever so slowly, the intensity making you feel like he was touching you without even doing it, making you squirm.
But you weren't about to give in easily, inching back slightly even as your hand slid up his shoulder. "I don't know, Suguru." You smirked at him. "Can you?"
He returned the gesture, eyes smoldering. "Wanna find out?"
"I–"
"I'm home!"
Suguru jerked back at the sound of Satoru's voice from the direction of the hallway, leaving him with no choice but to stand awkwardly against the adjacent sink.
"In here!" you called out, picking up your abandoned sandwich, taking a bite as you suppressed laughter at nearly being caught by your brother who appeared by the archway and leisurely entered the kitchen.
"You're here, too? Didn't know you were coming over," he said to Suguru. "Had dinner yet?"
Suguru furtively glanced at you. "Was about to."
You winked at him then hopped out of the counter, taking your sandwich with you, motioning to leave the kitchen.
"That's all you're gonna eat? Is Utahime telling you to lose weight or something?" Satoru asked, noticing your food.
"Nah, too lazy to whip anything up." You looked at Suguru, your gaze pregnant with meaning. "I'll be in my room. Don't bother me."
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© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI’S “JUJUTSU KAISEN”. [20240704]
PHOTOS/IMAGES/GIF/FANART/ANY MEDIA CREDITS GO TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.
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rotisserory · 3 months ago
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Aventurine Is BPD Coded- Some Thoughts
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Ahhh welcome back everybody to another installment of 'Rory writes a ridiculously long essay nobody asked for to shine light on characters who exhibit symptoms of borderline personality disorder so that we can learn to recognize symptoms portrayed in media that aren't just 'crazy manipulative abusive ex' and start to treat the disorder with a shred of compassion' !!
A good chunk of you follow me because of my essay I wrote on Reo Mikage from Blue Lock, my beautiful borderline princess, and I am PLEASED to announce that my essay is now the first result when you search 'Reo Mikage BPD' on Google, AND he has since been added to the BPD character database !! Saving the world one baddie at a time, no need to thank me B)
Today, I want to write something out that I've been dying to share. I think Aventurine can be read as a BPD coded character, and I think he would be able to cop a diagnosis should he go see a therapist (which we all know he CLEARLY has not done). I've been puttering around posting this because I've been spending so long on a full, all encompassing analysis of this sick blonde man, but I want to take a quick break and kick my feet over BPD Aventurine, so I invite you to come kick your feet with me!
Some context before I start:
1.) Borderline representation is extremely important to me. I've got the BPD / CPTSD combo meal, so I'm having TWICE the fun !! But seriously though, it's not easy being viewed as crazy and 'bad' all the time. Trauma disorders are rough enough as it is just to live with / overcome, but it's worse when there are books, forums, blogs, shows, ect. dedicated to hating you and talking about how evil you are. So, I get really excited when I spy BPD-coded characters (especially if they're likable people and not just ghoulish irredeemable villains or manic pixie dream girl characters). Fans, characters, and even Aventurine himself refer to him as 'crazy' 'insane' 'unstable' which only further rang my BPD bells because he's not crazy; he's just traumatized!
2.) I’m not a psych, so I obviously can’t diagnose real people, and don’t use any of this to diagnose yourself (I don't need the scandal!) I do, however, have a masters degree in English and structured the basis of my education and published my thesis on mental health, cluster B personality disorders specifically, so I read and research a LOT. I’m confident enough in my knowledge to diagnose anime characters (lol).
3.) If you're somebody who has a weird hangup about borderlines, feel free to either not read this, or do read it and soak up some useful information! Regardless, I know Aventurine fans can have some really wild takes (/neg) , so believe what you want at the end of the day! This is just my interpretation of what's festering in that sad brain of his. You can disagree all you want to, but what we're not going to do is spread hateful stereotypes or perpetuate negative stigmas about BPD! That's cornball behavior and I will call you out for it ^-^
CW for discussion of death, suicide, self injury, and identity disturbances
Anyways, if you ask me, Aventurine has a case of Beautiful Princess Disorder, and I'd like to explain why <3 So, buckle up! This will be another long one.
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First, let me define BPD: it's a personality disorder characterized by a long-standing pattern of instability in mood, interpersonal relationships, and self-image. Though it's coined as a 'personality disorder', I urge you to look at it as a trauma disorder. People most often develop it when they are repeatedly traumatized during their formative years. It actually overlaps a TON with complex post traumatic stress disorder, which is why a lot of us baddies end up with both! (On that note, you could definitely view Aventurine as CPTSD-coded as well! I'm a stinky kinnie so I'll just say he's both <3) I won't preach too much on why it's so necessary to treat borderline as a traumatic stress disorder (since hopefully I'll be focusing my own personal academic research on that and I could yap for HOURS about it lol).
But when we look at BPD properly, it's evident that the basis of this disorder is that these people didn't have the opportunity to learn and foster proper emotional reactions. Because of the recurring traumatic events, sections of borderline's brains are underdeveloped as a result. They have a smaller amygdala and they have reduced volume in the prefrontal cortex, as well as other differences in brain development. I've heard it described as 'you were forced to learn some behaviors that helped you survive at one point in your life (for example, maybe fervent efforts to avoid abandonment, unstable emotional reactions, self harming tendencies, lying, mirroring, etc.,) but now you need to unlearn them, because they’re no longer helping you.'  They're trauma responses.
Aventurine shows us a perfect example of the kind of shit that would make someone develop BPD: dude grew up in extreme poverty, was constantly told he was special and he was supposed to bring good luck, watched his entire family and race die in front of him when he was literally still just a kid, was kidnapped and sold into slavery, was forced to murder roughly 34 people while everybody watched him like it was a game, probably went through several other fucked up things while he was enslaved, and then killed his slave owner and was promptly sentenced to death for it. That's...a whole lot of ridiculous trauma that would severely impact somebody's ability to mentally grow and develop correctly. The bulk of his childhood/adolescence was spent with no safety, no security, overwhelming guilt, constant fight or flight reactions, learning how to take on other personas to avoid violence or mistreatment – you get the point. He did not have a normal life and it is absolutely probable that he would develop a trauma disorder from the shit he's been through.
So then, what behaviors/signs does somebody need to exhibit to receive a Borderline diagnosis? The 9 diagnostic criteria for BPD are as follows:
1. Fear of abandonment
2. Unstable or changing relationships
3. Unstable self-image; struggles with identity or sense of self
4. Impulsive or self-damaging behaviors
5. Suicidal behavior or self-injury
6. Varied or random mood swings
7. Constant feelings of worthlessness or sadness
8. Problems with anger, including frequent loss of temper or physical fights
9. Stress-related paranoia or loss of contact with reality
As with my last post, I'm going to organize this based on the 5 immediate traits I think Aventurine exhibits most (you only need 5 out of 9 to receive a diagnosis, so let me cut to the chase and stop wasting your time w my yapping).
Fear of Abandonment:
Aventurine has a habit of wanting relationships and then pushing them away once they get too close. He also clearly has trauma associated with losing people prematurely.
First of all, let's look at Aventurine's tendency to view relationships as transactional. With the expectation that a friendship, partnership – whatever –  is mutually beneficial, that generally implies both parties will leave satisfied once the 'transaction' is complete. That’s his parting line in the game, actually! “Satisfied with our transaction, I trust?” 
That being said, he's already prepared for people to leave when they're done getting what they want from him. In one trailer (and the game) he refers to himself as "another cog in the machine known as the strategic investment department" and then says, "Your humble servant aventurine at your disposal [...] I can also play the role of ‘friend’ – if needed; Go ahead, use me as you wish, even stab me in the back if you see fit."
This is a very strange thing to say upon first meeting someone LMAO. He's speaking of himself like he's an object, rather than a person. Before the other party even says anything, he's basically saying 'hey btw if you end up disappointing me in some way, i'm already prepared for it!' Establishing relationships with the assumption that the other person will betray you/abandon you/hurt you in some way? Borderline behavior. God forbid somebody does try to break down one of these walls, we'll see Aventurine's second habit to avoid abandonment: pushing people away.
Something people don't necessarily consider is that ‘efforts to avoid abandonment’ doesn't always mean the person is on their knees begging you to not to leave them. It can manifest as someone being very flighty and purposefully cutting ties randomly/pushing people away from them so that nobody is able to abandon them. If you leave first, they can’t leave you, right? This is a very common behavior for borderlines to avoid the pain that comes with being abandoned.
The most notable moment of this, in my opinion, is when Aventurine tries to gaslight himself into thinking that Ratio really did stab him in the back during their ploy against Sunday. As we know, their fighting, bickering, and Ratio's 'betrayal' were all part of Aventurine's plan. When they leave Sunday's office, Ratio immediately asks if he's okay and if he needs help, and Aventurine is very dismissive/a little rude in his response. Ratio is confused because Aventurine is talking as if he wasn't the one who MADE this plan and TOLD Ratio what to do:
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Aventurine is basically saying, "Hey babe this is not in the script we talked about! Let's stay on track, remember? You hate me, you betrayed me, and now you're leaving me!" And Ratio is like "Yeah okay but are you good? Because you don't seem good,” but Aventurine's heels are so far in the dirt at this point that he is NOT budging at all. When he's in the Trauma Maze, Future Aventurine grills him on this moment:
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I get why this part confused some people; why would Aventurine think this when the plan was his idea in the first place? Because, he subconsciously doesn't want to get too attached to the idea that Ratio might ACTUALLY care about him or want to help him. He's forcing himself to think "no, that's not what he was doing, he was planning on actually ratting me out all along, he was only asking about my wellbeing to get in my head."
However, I think it's evident that Aventurine wants relationships/attention just as much as everybody else does, he just won't let himself have it. To further this idea, I think the lyrics to White Night (the Penacony trailer theme song) are worth looking at (these specifically):
I don't wanna be alone tonightOh, lead me with your altered signThere's no one else left for me to loseHeadin' to the other side, other side
I don't wanna be alone tonightI'll bring you to my best disguise'Cause you don't need, don't need to know the truthLet me rave forever in your life
The song is obviously about Aventurine when you look at the lyrics, but these lines in particular just further my point that this man does NOT like the fact that he's alone. He wants relationships, he wants closeness, but he rejects it at the same time out of fear that he might lose somebody prematurely again and doesn't want to experience being abandoned or being rejected for his personality (his real one or his fake one), which leads me to...
Unstable Self-Image; Struggles With Identity or Sense of Self:
The shift from Kakavasha to Aventurine screwed this guy up REAL bad. A MASSIVE part of Aventurine's character, in my opinion, is his struggle with his identity/sense of self. I mean, he literally had to kill off who he used to be in order to live how he's living now, and he didn't have much of a choice in the matter. Jade sums it up pretty well when Aventurine is sat before her on trial: 
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Aventurine joining the IPC comes with the price of...well, becoming 'Aventurine'. Since I'm clocking him with a BPD diagnosis, the identity disturbance would have probably happened before this moment, and I think it did. I'll bet it started festering after that first massive traumatic event where he watched his family die and tried to rationalize how that was possible with his 'good luck' (since that was really the only consistent idea he had about himself), and it probably only got worse when he became fixated on the fact that whoever tf he is, he's only worth 60 copper coins (did the math – that's about $3). That's gotta cause some massive identity issues. He's coined as this ‘good luck charm’, this ‘blessed child’, a ‘beacon of hope for the Avgins’, and somehow, he ended up in the absolute worst situation possible while simultaneously dooming all of the Avgins (obviously not his fault, but he thinks it's his fault).
When Jade tells him to pick a new identity, ironically he picks one that is everything he probably grew to hate after his childhood/adolescence.
Associating with the wealthy? The rich were the people who paid to brand him and enslave him. The IPC? Promised to help the Avgins but disappeared when the Katicans invaded, then came back and kidnapped him to sell him as a slave. Now he's both wealthy and a part of the IPC, and you have to wonder how he truly feels about it. We'll look into that more later. Regardless, he's not really 'free' now, even if he isn't technically owned by a master anymore. He's chained to the IPC because this is life now; this is his identity. Where else would he even go? What else would he do? (Die, perhaps?) It's not like he can go home, or go live a peaceful life out on the countryside somewhere. He made 'Aventurine' his entire life and his entire personality. On that note, I really like this quote from his third character story:
“The aventurine, that symbol of power and of the future, is about to be officially handed to him — Yet it would have no more allure or value in his eyes as soon he obtains it, even though he had sought it by putting his life on the line.
He returns to his office in a daze. The aventurine stone emits a peculiar glow on his desk, seemingly congratulating and mocking him at the same time."Was luck truly on your side when you wrestled with fate?"”
Did he really luck out with this one? Comparatively, of course, this is better than his life as a slave, but he essentially just traded his rusted chains for golden ones. Becoming Aventurine might wind up bringing him a lot more pain than it was worth. 
Also, the outfit he chose? Covered in gold, fur, and jewels, all materials that somebody who knows nothing about being rich would assume rich people wear in excess. It's evident in his tacky taste (sorry honey I love you so much but the hat is just crazy work you look like a pimp) that he doesn't know anything about how to dress himself. And I bully him for being tacky but it makes sense! He dresses exactly how you'd think an out-of-touch billionaire would dress. Back to his sense of identity: it's very important to establish that Aventurine feels guilty about taking on this persona! That's all 'Aventurine' is: a persona. If he were to die tomorrow, the IPC would dust off that stone and give it to another bozo who would end up being the next 'Aventurine'.
While he didn't initially develop this personality subconsciously and it was a 'choice' to start playing this role (not that he had a plethora of alternative options), the perpetuation is damaging him mentally. He does a good job of keeping up the act, obviously. This theme that his entire personality is just one big act is overarching through the entire Penacony quest, but there's one moment in particular I really liked: when Sparkle is being a jerk and he has this offhand comment about how he's so frivolous, vain, and flashy, and how he'd hate to live anywhere where it rained since his outfit is too expensive to get wet.
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Then, we have this interaction in the maze: Future Aventurine brings up the memory of him and his big sister playing dead, floating in bloody water to avoid being killed by the Katicans when they attacked. He mentions that it was his father's shirt, the last one his father left behind before dying, and that it was ruined. Aventurine says it wasn't ruined, and he's always kept it. (I wonder if that's the shirt he wore during his time enslaved?) Future Aventurine grills him and asks ‘why keep it? This new person that you are would never wear something so dirty and old. 'Aventurine' wouldn't want that old rag, it's not worth any money. 'Aventurine' would never splash around in murky water like that; he wouldn't need to.’ Nobody is hunting him, now he's the hunter. Future Aventurine makes the snide comment that he bets Aventurine wouldn't even dare to go outside in the rain, let alone do any of the things Kakavasha had to do, since he's so much more elite now. Aventurine, clearly hurt by the implication, says that even after all this time, he's never changed.
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Of course, he hasn't. Deep down, no matter how much he tries to trick himself and everybody around him, he's still the same scared, traumatized boy he always has been. His future self chastises him for having an inferiority complex and mentions that with every gamble he makes, he has his left hand shaking in fear behind his back.
But the constant pull to push Kakavasha down and keep up this act that 'Aventurine' is the real him obviously perpetuated the identity disturbance in him and made it a hundred times worse, to the point where (as Future Aventurine points out) the hole he's dug is basically impossible to climb out of.
Because of this, I interpret Aventurine to constantly be struggling with his identity, not knowing who really exists under all the masks he wears, not knowing if he or anybody around him will ever figure it out. I imagine he feels very empty and unfulfilled, since as I mentioned in the abandonment section, he doesn't want to be alone. But the higher he climbs on the social ladder, the further he can separate himself from other people. This is a classic issue borderlines face. We masquerade as something we think the people around us will like, someone WE might like, but it always ends up leaving us feeling more empty than before.
(This is just an added bonus to chew on, but I got stuck on this line when I played through Penacony:)
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Do you think once he became Aventurine and got the money and the resources, he researched toys that normal kids play with? Fancy ones like building blocks, stuff that he would have never been exposed to as a kid? Obviously baby Kakavasha would not know wtf building toys looked like, and I'm sure teenage Kakavasha didn't have the opportunity to browse toy catalogs. But, he recognizes the toy even though he says he's never played with them before. Maybe he considered buying it but decided against it, since it doesn't fit his new persona. Kakavasha doesn't exist anymore, so there's no reason to nurture that part of him. Anyways, just wanted to hurt y'all a bit more. Speaking of hurting ourselves:
Impulsive or Self-Damaging Behaviors + Suicidal Behavior or Self Injury:
I'm combining these two because my points kept blending together, so bear with me lol.
Aventurine is known for being incredibly reckless and putting himself in the path of danger over and over again. When discussing how he tricked Sunday with the Cornerstones, Future Aventurine asks:
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I want to exaggerate how crazy it is (i can say that i'm also a bpd baddie) that he smashed his Cornerstone. I don't think a Stoneheart has ever done that before. Their stone is what makes them a Stoneheart. Ratio mentions that without it, Aventurine would be back to being nobody. Remember: that's what makes him Aventurine. You know, the persona that required him to kill off his former identity? Their Cornerstones are more important than the Stonehearts’ lives, as stated multiple times. But that's just it: Aventurine doesn't GAF about his life. He doesn't mind putting his life on the line to pull off his plan because he has that deep-rooted desire to punish himself for everything he thinks was his fault. He gets called out for gambling with his life multiple times during Penacony, and while most of the time it's reduced to him just being crazy (cough, bpd) or just having a severe gambling problem. Extremely hot take, but I think he gambles literally as another way to hurt himself. I mean, look at what he says when you ask about his hobbies:
"There's no denying it, my fascination is with the game of chance... be it the exhilarating rush of triumph or the extensive emptiness that follows, both are worth savoring, time and time again."
Being impulsive and risky, betting his life over and over –  it makes him feel alive. He knows the end result will hurt, that he'll have to face that 'extensive emptiness' and the extreme guilt he feels regarding his continued good luck, but he does it anyway.
Speaking of betting, his bets are always 'all or nothing', seemingly every time. Future Aventurine calls him out on always risking everything with every gamble, asking:
"Do you truly believe the greater the risk, the greater the reward?"
Or...do you just not care what happens to you? He doesn't need to risk a lot; he's never lost. He could bet the lowest amount and still win every time, and make a lot of money depending on what everybody else bet. In fact, that would actually be a better strategy in gambling (poker/black jack specifically), because it would insinuate that he's not very confident with his hand and prompt the other players to bet higher, assuming that they'll beat him.
I imagine he gets a shred of dopamine betting everything he has knowing that he'll probably win, but hey, who knows? Then after winning and multiplying everything he has, I imagine that 'extensive emptiness' that he refers to is the feeling of 'oh good, more money. More status. More success. A reminder that no matter what I do, I'm stuck here in this role forever.'
For some reason, he also thinks that taking risks makes him appear more confident and secure. He makes a show of always keeping up the big bets and he boasts about how successful he is, while clutching his hand behind his back thinking 'oh god, is this it? will I finally lose this time?' He brings this up when he's speaking with himself and he says, 'How could a weak person take such daring risks?"
Oh, the delicious irony.
That raises the question, though: if he wants to die so badly, why hasn't he yet? It's not like he had an easy life. He fought very hard to stay alive, so why does he act so recklessly now?
I think at his core, he's scared. Dying is scary. His family is there in the afterlife; would they be disappointed in the person he’s become? At the same time, being alive is exhausting. The constant emotional pain this guy probably deals with every day? It's gotta be heavy.
His behaviors around suicide remind of a classic passively suicidal person with BPD: maybe they don't necessarily want to die, but they're tired. They don't have an active plan, but If something is going to kill them, they're not going to move out of the way.
So, carrying out his Penacony plan makes sense. Of course he’s not completely sure what will happen when Acheron kills him, but because he doesn’t have anything to live for, he’s fine gambling with his life. He makes a show of finally throwing out every last chip, too, no longer clutching them under the table in fear. He was fine with smashing the Aventurine stone because it's not like he was planning on using it after his final show; the little bit of power it had left in it was more than enough.
That being said, we do have to address this little number:
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Aventurine attempted several times in Penacony, he admits it flat out. The writers even went sofar as to bold this line specifically! I think this does also go hand-in-hand with him being passively suicidal, since he's pretty sure he'll live when he attempts in the dream, but he's gonna try it SEVERAL times just to be sure. Mentally healthy people wouldn't try it... once, Aventurine!
As if we needed more evidence that Aventurine constantly puts himself in danger, you know I HAVE to mention...the light cone:
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n case you haven't read the description for this light cone, let me share it with you:
"You don't believe me?"He (Aventurine) provocatively looks at the man (Ratio) before him, then draws out a revolver, empties its cylinder, and leaves a single shot in the chamber.
"Seems like I'll need to get you up to speed on how I do things if our cooperation were to remain amicable."He pushes the gun into his opponent's hand, spins the cylinder, and points the barrel to his own chest.
He pulls the trigger repeatedly, and the smile on his face remains the same after three empty clicks."Life is a grand gamble, and I'll always be the final victor."
Now what the HELL is this? Mind you, this is the first time Ratio has met this man!!! Imagine you meet your new mission partner for the first time and he puts a revolver in your hand and fires it thrice, then leaves. WHO does that? (...a baddie, perhaps!)
I don't think it's a secret to anybody who has spent a reasonable amount of time around Aventurine that there's something off about him, and that there's a really deep sadness running through him. There's some instances where other characters mention his passive desire to die – A few quick examples I can think of:
The instance in Story IV with Opal:
"Maybe luck won't be on your side this time, and the bill for all your past good fortune will come due [...] But isn't that what you've been longing for?"
Opal implies Aventurine wants to fail on Penacony, which, as we've discussed, is an accurate assumption. Jade says something similar after Aventurine's stunt: when Topaz says the light in his stone went out, Jade replies by saying "he got what he wanted."
Also, I’d like to point out that Ratio must have been anticipating that Aventurine would do something rash, since he wrote that note (doctor's advice) long before he started grilling him after the meeting with Sunday.
It's also worth noting the nod to T.S Eliot's "The Waste Land" (a very long poem about life and death). You get the achievement Sibyl, What Do You Want? after playing through the past of Kakavasha's life, and once you defeat boss Aventurine, you get the achievement She Replied, I Want to Die. I don't think that one needs an explanation, but boy does it hurt! (There's other, smaller nods to him being suicidal, like the Waiting for Godot achievement – Google the story if you're unfamiliar. Not as relevant, but I must mention it bc it makes my english major brain go brrrrr)
Also, overspending/gambling/being loose with money is a very common vice for borderlines to indulge in and harm themselves with. It's also implied that he drinks a decent amount. I counted 6 bottles of SoulGlad in his hotel room just from the angles I could see, and he's shown to be passed out at the bar when Ratio goes to get him before they go on their little date-I mean, mission. Aventurine says 'he must have drank too much', and whether or not that was true is irrelevant since it was a believable enough claim that Ratio bought it.
Borderlines are (usually) self-destructive in some capacity, and while some very annoying people assume it's for attention, it's so much more common for it to be because our inner emotions are just so out of whack. Sometimes, matching the inner pain with outer pain is a way to cope. They might also do it to try and combat-
Constant Feelings of Worthlessness or Sadness:
Probably the most nagging, prevalent feeling Aventurine deals with is the constant feeling of worthlessness. One thing about this man? He hates himself. Like, really hates himself. Take a look at the missions during his maze in Penacony. This one is one of my favorites:
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It doesn't get much more on-the-nose than him calling himself a selfish, useless loser. He gets stuck on that word, in particular. Loser.
Aventurine, at his core, views himself as a massive loser. Is that ironic because of how much he wins? Not really. Money and materials are just part of the Aventurine persona. He's 'rich' in stuff, but he's not rich in what he actually wants. I think it's obvious that if he had the option to quadruple his wealth or see his sister again just one more time, we all know what he'd be picking.
The only thing he wants is connection – connection with his mother, his father, his sister, anybody at this point – but he can't have it. His family has been dead for a long while, and as I discussed before, his fear of abandonment and his luck scare him away from forming any other relationships. 
This luck, this destiny to be blessed, leads him to reflect on his life a lot and wonder what the hell the point is. He treats himself like some sort of walking curse, because he's convinced that his luck is bound to hurt other people. Every time he wins, somebody else loses. The luck that keeps him safe destroys everybody else around him. As Future Aventurine puts it:
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His luck is "built on the pain of someone" else. This perpetuates the constant feeling of guilt, which in turn, makes him feel worthless. Why is it him that's spared every time?
Then, right before you start his boss fight, Aventurine says,
"The architect's flawed stone, of no value at all."
Some people speculate he's talking to the MC when he says this, but I can't help but assume that he's referring to himself. Even if it was directed at the MC, so much of what Aventurine says in his bluffs and boasts are just digs at himself. He's sort of an expert at hating himself, and what do people who hate themselves do if not project? Especially when you consider the fact that aventurine is actually a really cheap, undesired stone. It's like $3 a caret and mostly only used to rip people off and pose as jade. I really don't think it's a coincidence that his character is based around a stone that is, essentially, worthless.
The way that Aventurine is also prone to giving people ridiculous amounts of money/gifts can be read as a frantic effort to keep relationships going and prevent people from leaving him (relating to my points on both his feelings of worthless and his fear of abandonment). He has a skewed view on relationships, since the only value that's ever been associated with him is monetary value and that of his 'luck', which in every context is spoken of as an asset to benefit people he cares about. His sister told him that his luck was 'the most precious wealth' of the Avgins and Jade sees him as an investment that can bring her more wealth because of his luck, but he views it as a massive burden that ends up wrecking everybody around him. So how does he prove to other people that someone as worthless as him should be allowed a seat at the table? Deep down, he thinks that he's still worth 60 red copper pieces, and he's desperate to show other people that he's worth more than that now – even though he doesn't believe it at his core. With all the money he wins now, he can throw it at people and say 'look, look how much money I'm worth now, you want me around because I can buy you anything you want, that's a useful quality in a friend!'
(I did use the 'seat at the table line' as a nod to what his slave master said to him when they were discussing his worth: "Don't forget your place, slave. You're not qualified to be at the table." Which is, painfully, what Aventurine says when you open up chests! He scoffs and says that "it's hardly enough for a seat at the table." :’) )
There is also, of course, Aventurine's overarching struggle with finding purpose in his life. We see a lot of his existentialism during his trauma maze, but at the end of his trauma maze, Future Aventurine finally stops ripping Aventurine a new one and is vulnerable for a second, saying he doesn't understand what he's ever done wrong to have suffered as much as he has.
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Then, when he's in the Nihility and he's speaking to Acheron, making the decision on whether or not he even wants to keep going, he asks her:
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As I said, he has this conversation with himself in the maze as well, but here he's actually being vulnerable and speaking to somebody else about it: what's the point in being alive if we're just born to suffer? If nothing else, this solidifies the emotional struggle that Aventurine is constantly having. I also think it furthers the idea that he has this nagging sort of emptiness inside of him which is another BPD trait: the feeling that you're empty at your core, and you're constantly trying to fill it with things (friends, money, substances, whatever) but nothing ever works. You worry if anything will ever make you feel 'whole' again, and pair with the the identity disturbance? You're left with a constant feeling of despair.
Other Points:
These are a few other random thoughts I have, inspired by in-game moments but I'm taking them for my own evil fiendish BPD narrative. Take them with a grain of salt.
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I think the stigma he gets around 'being crazy' is really BPD-coded. Separate from the ridiculous discrimination he gets for being an Avgin where people assume he's a liar and wolf in sheep's clothing (which can this man catch a SINGLE break jfc), he also has this reputation of being crazy, insane, manipulative, cunning, and someone you want to avoid, which is more rooted in his reckless gambling habit and status with the IPC. Living with this reputation of being insane and unstable for...lowkey no reason at all? Very BPD coded. I think Aventurine leans into that stigma to keep people a certain distance away, but it also just ends up making him hate himself even more.
Also, his entire mantra is "all or nothing", which always rang my BPD bells as well. There's not a lot of gray area with him, which is a key trait in borderlines as we often display very black-and-white thought patterns.
In Conclusion:
I think Aventurine is a borderline princess <3
No but actually though, Aventurine is extremely smart, witty, funny, generous, and very kind-hearted, and he also happens to have a lot of BPD symptoms :^) I don't think it does any harm to view him as BPD-coded; in fact, I think it's great to associate positive, fan-favorite characters like this with BPD because it helps to humanize us. Borderlines are not violent, crazy maniacs, they're people who have been severely traumatized and developed some unhealthy habits because of it. They deserve love, respect, understanding, and communication, just as everybody else does.
If you actually made it this far, thank you for reading! I hope I was able to shed some light on Aventurine and his Symptoms. And, as I do in all of my BPD posts, here’s your reminder to kiss the borderline baddies in your life and tell them they’re important to you :^) Living with BPD is exhausting and I know I speak for all of us when I say that. We try so hard every day to stay positive and regulated, and though rewarding, it's exhausting and very hard work. Nothing makes us smile more than some recognition that we're trying our best !!
Till next time xoxo (and shout out to @roxirinart for helping me edit this monstrosity mwahhh mwah)
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