#anyways. as you can see i have been thinking a lot about all of that in this last year

[raebiis]

I was thinking about this last night, so I’ll share the idea I had here:

Organized crime- not (explicitly) the mafia bc that’s just gauche. But their roots are the same. This is temporarily from the love interest’s POV, so I’ll refer to them as MC for now. Also, this was more meant to be a sort of ‘warning’ to the MC but they’re drawn in anyway- it gets much worse when romance is involved… tbh I just love a good toxic relationship.

The MC (who I personally imagined as Al Pacino’s Micheal Corleone- a little fanfic just for me- but to each their own) is witness to an argument between two sisters. One is the ‘leader’ and the other is… not ignorant, but also not completely informed.

The other is a recovering addict who relapsed and the leader found out about it. The leader confronts the other and there’s an ensuing argument/one sided screaming fest while the other cries and tries to shift blame.

She blames it on her longtime boyfriend (there’s history there).

It’s a mistake.

“Oh,” leader says, suddenly calm. And why does she look a little amused? “Are you sure?”

“Yes,” cries other, unable to recognize the danger through her tears.

“Are you absolutely positive that it’s his fault?” Leader clarifies. “And this is how you want this to go?”

“Yes,” other insists.

“Okay,” leader says, and leans in to press a kiss to others head, “then just rest here and I’ll take care of it.”

And other would know better, should know better, if not for the relief of leader no longer being upset with her.

It’s only when leader pulls a gun from the drawer next to her that other catches on. But it’s too late, leader has already silently ordered the goons to keep other there and out of the way.

Other is begging, pleading, but her words fall on deaf ears. Leader brushes past MC on her way out, and MC turns to watch her out of the window.

Other’s boyfriend is outside, having just exited the shed out back. He looks up at Leader and begins to smile before she raises the gun- his face hardly has time to shift in horror before-

!!!

Leader takes her time meandering back to the house, other’s wails can be heard all the way down to the lake at the bottom of the hill the house sits on.

When leader enters again, MC can feel their heart racing and they take a measured step back. But leader doesn’t even notice them.

She sets the gun aside and goes to her sister, gathering her in her arms and shushing her tears.

“It’s alright,” says leader, “don’t worry. I’ve taken care of the problem. You can start to really work on recovery, now.”

And other blubbers out something that sounds a lot like a confession to having lied. Her boyfriend was innocent?

Leader’s smile is unsettling when she pulls back and cradles her sister’s crying face (she already knew). “Don’t say that, other. Because if he wasn’t the source of the infection?”

Her thumbs press deeply into the hinge of her sister’s jaw, and her smile is long gone by now.

“That means I’ll just have to cut deeper.”

And other has a look on their face- understanding, despair, and the unconditional love of siblings forged in fire. Other knows to forgive leader is to invite more pain, but how could she not? Leader is her sister, and her sister has been by her side all these years. And her sister isn’t always terrible. Most of the time she’s kind, generous, gentle…. That’s gotta mean something. It has to make up for all the times leader is cruel.

Doesn’t it?

(And, of course, we see the same happen to MC. They’ve seen the warning signs, but leader at her best is just so charming and so loving- how could they ever not love her? Why, even in her most wicked moments leader is only expressing the depth of their unfathomable love. Leader hurts them to save them. Right?)

fucked up hurt/comfort. the person who stabbed you tends to your wound. the person who killed your loved one helps you grieve.

[bluemotifofsleep]

The Process of Elimination

kuroo tetsurou x reader

- for someone so smart, Kuroo can be unbelievably dense.

you’re supposed to be doing your chemistry homework.

“how about Kenma?”

instead, Kuroo is listing the boys volleyball club members because you’d asked if he thought any of them were boyfriend material.

“one time Kenma said i had the posture of a 14 year old gamer boy. that kind of threw me off from him.” Kuroo makes a pained look.

“yeah, that sounds like Kenma.”

you weren’t actually all that interested in the boys volleyball team to be honest, already coming up with a reason you’re not compatible before he’s even got their name out. you’ve spent enough time around Kuroo (and by extension, the team) to know that you only had eyes for one of them. you’d only asked about it hoping that maybe he would say-

“Lev? he’s tall. girls like tall guys, right?”

“ughhh. Lev is like a little brother.” you’re face is scrunched in something akin to disgust at the mention of the childish underclassman. “plus, he’s three years younger than me. do you think i’m some kind of pedophile?”

Kuroo rolls his eyes.

“well, if you’re only interested in third year players, that narrows down your options.” your heart starts beating faster at the inevitable conclusion you know will come from this.

yes, there’s only three third years. kai, Yaku, and-

“why are you asking about only team members anyways?” he’s turned to fully face you now, discarding his textbook and miscellaneous papers on his bedspread. you’ve noticed that for such a responsible person, Kuroo can be really unorganized.

you’ve been noticing a lot about him recently. like how his cheeks flush after an especially tiring match, or the way he tilts his head back and does a full belly laugh at something Kenma says, or the way his smile is a little crooked when it’s real, or how when he’s focusing really hard on a question in your shared homework his brows furrow just slightly, kind of like they are now. like you’re a question he needs to work tirelessly at until you’re answered.

“well, you probably know them best.”

he hums in thought.

“what about Yaku?”

you hum back and pretend to think about it, rolling the thought of it around in your head and looking at it at every angle. you’re not interested in Yaku. you know this, why doesn’t he? how can’t he see the truth that’s right in front of him? literally, right in front of him.

“Yaku’s a bit short, isn’t he?” you shut him down like you’ve shut down every other player Kuroo has mentioned, hoping that by the process of elimination he could come to a conclusion. Kuroo is good at math, right?

“so you’re looking for a tall, handsome, funny but not mean, smart, third year on the volleyball team.” he says and he looks at you like at you like you’re chemistry homework he’s just figured out.

your heart starts pounding faster, there’s only one person left. you know he’s come to the same conclusion that you have. your fingers are pulling nervously at his duvet, and your shoulders are drawn tight up to your ears.

“you like Kai?” he says it like an epiphany. your shoulders drop. for someone so smart, Kuroo can be unbelievably dense.

you’ve had it.

“urgh! no, you idiot! you, its you. i’ve liked you for months now! literally how have you not noticed? you’re making me feel like i picked the wrong person to help me with homework, because if you’re going to act stupid, i may as well just do it by myself.”

after your words, the silence is deafening. you can hear each individual tick of the clock on his bed side table.

shit.

shit.

did you really just say all that?

Kuroo is looking at you like you’ve grown a second head. you scramble to say something, anything, to spare the last fraying pieces of your dignity, but your throat feels like it’s closed up.

“you like me?” he says it kind of like he repeats back your wrong answers on the practice sheet your working on, incredulous.

“um, yeah. maybe a little.” you’ve lost all the heat that came with your outburst. the air somehow feels prickly in his room, your arms breaking out in goosebumps.

you’d known that by initiating a conversation of this topic, he’d eventually find out. you just didn’t think he would look so shocked.

“you like me.” he repeats, and this time he’s got a furrow in his brow again. it sounds almost accusatory, like he thinks your lying to him. like the idea of you liking him is just so unfathomably weird, you have to be lying.

you’re instantly mad again.

“yeah, so what? what’s so bad about that?” your feelings are hurt, for sure. you didn’t necessarily expect him to reciprocate your feelings, but this outright dismissal of them is painful. “just reject me so we can finish this sheet and i can go home.”

he looks shocked suddenly, like you’ve slapped him across the face.

“no! that’s uh, that’s not what i meant.” and his words throw you off a bit. you’ve known Kuroo for a long time, and you’ve never heard him sputter so outright. he’s always been a fairly cool and collected guy, almost suave with his words, not easily caught off guard. right now, though, he looks as though you’ve taken the ground out from beneath his feet.

“but you- you really like me? like, actually?” the question repeated at you makes heat rise to your cheeks and you feel an embarrassing tickle at your nose, like you might cry.

“i’m leaving.” you start gathering your homework strewn across his bed.

“no, no! wait!” he grabs your wrist lightly, his hold on you loose. if you wanted to, you could pull away from him, but you don’t. as embarrassed as you are, the idea of leaving Kuroos bedroom and possibly never being invited back after your confession is heartbreaking. instead, you lean a tiny bit closer to him so his arm isn’t as strained, and you sit back down onto his plush mattress, ready to hear him out.

“i’m sorry. i was just surprised, is all.” and he sounds like he’s telling the truth. not disgusted, not alarmed, not disappointed, just surprised.

he’s facing you completely now, and he still hasn’t let go of your wrist, your skin tingling at the connection.

you try to sus him out from his expression alone, but the look on his face is hard to make sense of. he looks earnest, and he’s got a hard set to his brows. you’d almost say it looks determined. it reminds you of his face mid volleyball match, when he’s deciding how to get it right, when he’s calculating all of his moves. there’s a small blush on his cheeks, and it’s such an odd and out of place thing for kuroo, you almost wonder if you’re imagining it.

and then he’s leaning in and kissing the thought right out of your head.

you’ve read books before and heard girls gossiping about sparks flying and heat and electricity during a kiss, but this feels different. kissing Kuroo is like lifting off in a hot air balloon, your heart soaring above the clouds. it feels like floating, it feels like finally getting the right answer to a particularly hard chemistry question you’ve been working at for a while, it feels like watching the Nekoma volleyball team win a close match.

it feels like victory.

he finally pulls away after a while, both of you panting and red-cheeked, looking at each other with stars in your eyes. you can vaguely feel some of your homework being crunched under your hand that’s keeping you upright, but you can’t find it in your to care all that much. besides, if it gets ruined, that just means more time spent with Kuroo redoing all of it.

“i was just shocked, is all, about how convenient that is,” he’s slowly leaning back into you, and you can’t help the way you’re leaning in too, pulled together like magnets, like a positive and negative ion. “because i like you too.”

~

he’s such a dork. i’m in love with him.

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - I'm Late But Who Cares?

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

Jan 2025 Week 5

Ongoing Series - Thai

Your Sky (Sun iQIYI) ep 11 of 12 - Oh no my babies are in trouble! I actually don’t mind the coming out being part of the conflict, it’s rare to see these days, but it was more common in early BL. This show feels like such a throwback Thai BL anyway, that it’s sort of goes with the story. Of course it was conflict that was resolved almost immediately. But honestly I’m so charmed by the show I don’t mind any of this.

ThamePo (Fri YT) ep 8 of 12 - still enjoying but annoyed by Jun. I’m glad everybody’s feelings have been made clear, Iun is too much a little shit for the way he went about it. The hand holding was very cute tho. 

Truer words! When a character reveals the entire plot of a show.

The Boy Next World (Sun IQIYI) ep 4 of 10 - Phu’s friends are the best. I love them so much. Still cautiously enjoying this.

The Heart Killers (Weds Gaga) ep 10 of 12 - Why are Kant’s pants always too short in this show? Meanwhile, the plot progresses as expected. But it’s OK. I’m enjoying it enough. I like that Kant, who is slightly evil, is willing to go even more evil for the man he loves. It was a twist I was not expecting. I believe it less with Style. Oh my, have we turned into a caper all of a sudden? Huh. This was a good episode. But then I do like a caper.

I’m also gonna mention briefly that I see you Heart Killers for using old tropes in a new way. The bleacher shot (Lovesick callback), the empty pool. Very very clever.

Fourever You (Thurs YT) ep 17 end - Nice solid ending I remain more interested in the couples we never got but i hope we get a season 2. 

Conclusion

A standard university Thai BL centering around two couples (med student meets engineering youth) in two parts (chasing the forever dragon that is 2 Moons). This was watchable but not much more than that with nice optics. Best if you can get hold of the extended (sexy) version especially for the second couple. 8/10 

Perfect 10 Liners (Sun YT) ep 14 of 24 - Wine is totally getting the "good one." Faifa (hands-down my favorite character in the series) is the master of the sarcastic ja particle. He’s very clever with it. Pay attention if particles in Thai interest you. I don’t understand why Yotha it’s so special that everybody’s willing to cater to his erratic whims.

(Am I the only one who thinks that Book and Santa should lead a BL together?)

Sangmin Dinneaw (Sun iQIYI) ep 5 of 10 - This is such an odd show. But it was a very nice kiss. And more.  And I love the boy admiring his marks after. Nice touch.

Flirt Milk (Sat YT) ep 2 or 10 - everyone behaves like a complete idiot and it’s driving me nuts.

Ossan‘s Love Thailand (Mon YouTube) ep 4 of 12 - I dislike most of the characters in this show, but I truly loathe the daughter character.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

When it Rains it Pours (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 4 of 10 - I continue to enjoy this more every week, and I’m really looking forward to next week. (Shocker.)

Eternal Butler (Taiwan Fri Gaga) eps 8 of 12 - no ep this week, Happy New Year! 

Impression of Youth (Taiwan Weds Viki) eps 4 of 9 - It’s modestly enjoyable but of all the relationships I think I like the brothers the best. I mostly have a smile on my face when I watch it, but so far it’s eminently forgettable. To the point where I occasionally forget to watch it when it airs. That said it looks like next week we’re getting very Taiwanese. 

Teenager Judge (Vietnam Sat YT) ep 17 of ?? - sigh

It's airing but......

I Will Turn Back Time (China Gaga) 6 eps - It’s Chinese, no idea if it will end well or not. But it’s the stepbrothers trope. Still, I’m not gonna watch it until it’s done.

In Case You Missed it

Winter Is Not The Death of Summer (Thai) - It's done. Spies reported in the following: Not recommend. "Lots of awkward silence and muddled story. Abrupt ending. Doesn't lean into either the romance or the prison aspect." So yeah, I'm leaving it a DNF.

End of year wraps are here!

2024 Trend Report

MY BEST & WORST BLs of 2024

Best Kisses (and sex scenes) of 2024

BL's 2024 Quirky Awards

2024 Awards - Quick Picks

Next Week Looks Like This:

*** Yeah we already in it and my calendar is a complete mess, so no visual for you. ***

On now: FC Soldout (Korea iQIYI) 8eps - sports BL, football player meets actor.

2/14 Exclusive Love (Taiwan Gaga) - Shy aspiring singer inherits funeral business.

2/27 Secret Relationships (Korea iQIYI) - Stars Wei's Kim Jun Seo. Adapted by Cradle Studio (Kakao). About clever and resourceful Daon who has worked hard to overcome being poor. His cheap ways annoy his coworker, Sunghyeon but after “an incident” with his parents, Daon grows closer to him. But Daon also has feelings for his former tutor. This has the signs of a classic Kdrama all over it: Office setting, love triangle, lead suffering for his self-actualization. I’m optimistic about a longer treatment.

2025 Line Up

BL Announced for 2025 - PART 1

BL Announced for 2025 - PART 2

20 BLs Announced for 2025 That I'm Really Excited About

GMMTV 2025 Line Up - My Totally Biased and Wildly Flawed Feels

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Best line in BL history? Possibly

(last week)

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity @rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

[alarajrogers]

Commiserate with them. He's a liar, but the news media did their best to hide it, because if it bleeds it leads and they knew Trump would cause so much chaos and suffering, it'd be great for the news. It's not like the old days when reputable journalists ran the news; nowadays it's all giant billionnaire corporations, and all they care about is money, and screwing over little guys like us to make a buck. Honestly, you wanna know what's really going on, read foreign news media like the Guardian and stuff like that; they have laws that kept the billionnaires from buying all the news media over there, so they're still telling the truth at least some of the time. You're from Venezuela? Great! I'll bet you Mexican news sources are willing to tell you the truth about our leaders, though they'll lie to protect their own. As a native Spanish speaker, you have access to a world of news media I can't read. It's ok if you don't trust Venezuelan media, there's the entire continent of South America, plus Spain itself, and you can read any of it you want. It's all on line, just google it in Spanish. I'm so sorry this is happening to you. In today's world you can't blindly trust anyone; you have to do your own research, but there's so many crackpots and conspiracy theorists out there who are just making shit up to make a buck. I mean, did you know his ex-wife -- the dead one, the one he buried on his golf course -- wrote a memoir where he beat and raped her because she gave him a referral to a doctor for a hair implant and the doctor messed it up? I mean, she said afterward, no, she didn't mean to imply that he treated her badly... but she put it in there in black and white. I think she was scared of him. I mean, she ended up dead and he wouldn't allow an autopsy, and she got buried on his golf course. I'm from New York; we've been seeing this guy's shenanigans since the 80's, so I know, I wouldn't put anything past him. You know he was a really good friend of Jeffrey Epstein, right? Who died in prison the last time he was president? Yeah, obviously there's no proof of anything, but you gotta wonder. Anyway, you take care of yourself. It's a damn shame politicians get away with lying like that. I know we always joke that politicians lie, but this guy. Wow.

This kind of thing. You don't blame them for being taken in. You blame Trump for being a liar and the news media for collaborating. You don't mention Democrats and Republicans, you talk about "politicians", because on both sides of the aisle most people agree, politicians suck. You talk about billionnaires propping him up because they want to steal our money to make themselves richer. You express sympathy for them. Maybe, depending on your audience, drop some of the salacious conspiracy-like hints about Trump's behavior.

Meet them where they are, and offer them friendship and sympathy. You're a lot more likely to get them on our side that way.

[goddamnitmahtin]

dc x dp idea 3

Ok ok ok I don’t know if anyone has done this before. But like mad scientist x attachment ghost au. BUT it’s reverse. So instead of Danny being the dead one in this situation, it’s Tim. I don’t know how Tim would have died but it’s when he’s in his late 20s and Danny is a mechanical engineer at WE, his haunt.

Now in this AU Danny is still a halfa and he even became ghost king. But this isn’t the universe he came from and here? He’s nothing more than a very tired engineer with some meta abilities (floating, eyes glowing, just enough of his ice powers to be able to make sure his whiskey is always on the rocks). But the thing about being ghost king? It makes you immortal. Even when you’re taking a vacation in another universe.

Upon finding out the ghost king starts working at his haunt, Tim finds himself a new obsession. Danny. He can’t get enough of this nerdy guy and the amount of things he could learn from the ghost king himself? Tim is foaming at the mouth! Ugh he just HAD to be everywhere this man went! Tim was even considering making himself an attachment ghost just so he could follow him around outside of work (like Danny ever actually left).

So imagine if you will.

Danny being the only one who can see Tim as he pokes and prods him all day everyday while he works.

“If your the ghost king why are you in this dimension working for WE?”

“Ooh what does space look like?”

“Could I ethically haunt your computer?”

“What’s your favorite color?”

“Tell me Danny, does every ghost see the cosmos in your eyes or is it just me?”

“What are you working on anyways?”

“Did you know when I was alive, I used to fight crime?”

“Hey Danny, how old are you for real? I know you aren’t actually 27 since you’ve claimed to be 27 for the past 9 years you’ve worked here and you don’t age. Is that a Ghost King thing?”

“Did you know that Gotham used to be chock full of super villains? Most of them are retired now but back in the day? WOW was it a lot of fun to punch that clown in the nose.”

“Hey Danny, how much ectoplasm would it take to make me corporeal? I don’t wanna be, I just think it’s a cool experiment.”

“Did you know that when I was alive, some fucker took my spleen and kept it in a jar for funsies?”

“My brother Jason died twice you know. Was he like, one of your subjects after the first time or did he get a free pass?”

“What’s your favorite food?”

“Have you ever been to Batburger? Is Batburger still a thing?”

“I used to be the CEO of this place, did you know that?”

“Hey Danny! Do I get cool ghost powers too if I marry you?”

“What are the Infinite Realms like? Is it cool?”

“Hey Danny, I went through your company file and I was wondering why you changed your last name to Nightingale? Is that an artistic choice?”

One day, Danny just snaps and has a full on argument with what all his coworkers on the night shift think is pure air, “WHAT WERE YOU, A STALKER WHEN YOU WERE ALIVE?!”

Tim smiles a toothy grin, “YES! AWWWW DANNY YOU DO LISTEN WHEN I TALK! Oh by the way, if you don’t fix that gear, the system is gonna blow.”

Danny does end up fixing it in time but still.

Anywho…. Tim slowly grows on Danny and after Danny has to leave the dimension because he’s gone too long without aging and his boss is getting suspicious, he decides, fuck it. He might as well take his ghost with him. Maybe he will get powers if he married him. Only one way for find out right?

[drksanctuary]

Was Nico really as significant as queer rep as people make him out to be? Or is it just nostalgia causing them to believe he is a lot more significant than he actually is? It's hard for me to gauge so I was wondering if you have an answer 😅

A lot of queer characters in fandom spaces particularly very popular ones were really only side characters or they were more frequently just presumes straight and no one was ever told otherwise. A lot of the big name fiction out there had characters that you had to create gay subtext for if you wanted any at all. (Which to be fair stems from male authors inability to write good enough female characters that a lot of the people wanted to ship male characters with other male characters because they were the only ones with character development) Nico was for the first time a 1. main character in a 2. Large fandom and was 3. Explicitly specified (not subtextually) as queer. He checked a lot of boxes all at once. Not to mention that the way he was outed, the fear, all of the “bad” things a lot of people say were handled with his character were all things that Millennial queers had to deal with. We didn’t have all the safe spaces or acceptance so that was realistic to a lot of our experiences.

But obviously these are generalizations and they’re based on my observations of what I saw and also colored by the country I live in (USA). So perhaps this isnt true or perhaps there are some nuances I am missing.

Personally, Nico and I came out the same year. It was my favorite book series, Nico was my favorite character and it seemed all of our favorite headcanons (Nico is gay and had a crush on Percy) became true. So it was a absolutely significant to me. I remember screaming with joy when I saw the excerpt and I was texting my partner about it and she was equally excited.

It was pretty big news in the fandom. A lot of fans were excited. And it was a kids book so that was significant in that kids could see themselves in Nico, and it would be validating.

Anyway sorry for the ramble, but I think, to answer your question, it was significant but perhaps was accented by nostalgia of the people who experienced it. It was iconic to us but it may not have been that big a deal to the world at large or even the fandom at large tbh.

I dunno who else you asked but imma tag some other people who were in the fandom back then bc maybe they can offer more insights or helpful opinions?

@avaetin @bvckbiter @aroaceleovaldez (?) @thomas-life @thinkingjasico @gutsybitsies

[setmeatopthepyre]

WIP wednesday enabled/tagged-ish by @peapodbond & @geddyqueer <3 really felt like sharing this slice of antarct-fic. enjoy!

-

Katie slides the bottle towards him. “Drink up, kid. The rations don't carry over.”

Buck happily obliges. They drink in companionable quiet for a while, Katie occasionally providing commentary on the people coming and going or doing the rounds, telling Buck who they are, how long they've been coming to the Ice, pointing out the winterovers and the ones with interesting stories.

They're watching two pilots (“That's Hisham, helo pilot, third timer. Girlfriend's a kiwi, she's at Scott base. Other fella's one of the Canadians with Ken-Borek. Loïc, think it was. Fixed wing pilot. They tend not to get along.”) get into an argument that both men seem too tired to actually escalate, when Buck speaks up.

“Katie, have you ever been in love?”

She dangles her bottle from between her finger tips, eyes still on the argument unfolding. “Sure.”

He props his head up on his hand to look at her. “What happened?”

Katie levels her steely gaze at him but something she sees makes her soften a little. Shrugs. “She ran off to go study insular dwarfism in Madagascan chameleons. Left me behind.”

Buck's eyebrows raise along with the corners of his mouth. “Oh. S-so you're--”

She nods, taps her bottle against his. Leans in and mock-whispers, “There's more of us than y'think, kid. Even out here.” Considers it. “Perhaps especially out here. The Ice tends to attracts people like us.”

Buck watches her take a swig of her drink and lets the words sink in. “Wait, what do you mean, 'people like us?'”

Her pale eyebrows inch towards the edge of her bandana. “What do you think I mean, Buckley?” She gestures at herself. “The gays, the dykes, the-- whatever you are. You know. The queers.”

“Oh.” Something uncomfortable twists in his gut. “I-I'm not--”

Katie leans back, genuine surprise written across her face. “Well I'm sorry, kid. I could'a sworn last night you spent all of three beers waxing poetic about your helo guy.”

Buck makes a face. “W-well. He-- he's not my... but--”

“You're in love with this man, yeah?”

And he can't help the lovestruck smile that's tugging at the corners of his mouth, dips his head. “Yeah.”

“And you're a guy.”

“Uh, o-obviously.”

“So you're...” she gestures and Buck realizes he's supposed to finish the sentence. He shifts in his seat, discomfort gnawing at him.

“Yeah, I, uh. Yes, I-I guess that would make me...” he trails off, looks at her pleadingly, not sure if he wants her to give him all the answers or just drop the subject entirely.

“So, what, are you homophobic?”

Katie's raspy voice still carries, and Buck casts a panicked glance around the bar. Thankfully, no one seems to have heard her. Or they're really good at hiding it. “No! No. No, of-- of course not. I-I'm... I've always been an ally.”

She raises her eyebrows. “An ally who's in love with a man but can't even say out loud that he's... what? Gay? Bi?”

He gives her a desperate look from where he has his face practically pressed against the tabletop. “Right? I-I should know, shouldn't I? How-- How can I-I not know?”

He's whining. That was definitely a whine.

As if by some miracle, Katie looks less unimpressed with him than she usually does, which doesn't say a whole lot, especially considering the fact that she's not even looking at him right now. She's staring off into space as she takes a long swig from her bottle. When she speaks, her voice is uncharacteristically gentle.

“You came all the way out here to follow the guy you're in love with,” she says, slowly, as if trying to explain something to a particularly dense but, arguably, loved child. Then she sighs, puts a calloused hand on his. “Look, kid, you don't need to choose from a whole bunch of labels. Hell, the only labels I knew 'til well into my thirties was dykes and fags.” And Buck tries not to flinch, but she clocks him anyway if the roll of her eyes is anything to go by.

She pats his hand. “You don't need any labels at all if y'don't want them. God knows they probably never think about it.” She gestures at the other bar patrons with her bottle. “But there's not needing a label, and there's bein' ashamed of what that label means, and a lot of us older folk used the former as an excuse for the latter for a long time. Claiming that label means something to us. It doesn't have to, for you, but if your guy spent any time in the closet, it might mean a whole lot to him.”

Buck takes a moment for the words to sink in. “What, so he thinks I'm... ashamed of my feelings for him?”

She pats his hand twice more before removing hers and leaning back. “Hell if I know, I'm not a mind reader.”

-

no pressure tagging @ambernotember @sugarpenchant @geddyqueer @beanarie @epiphainie @leashybebes @iphyslitterator @rcmclachlan @trombonechurchill

[beatlblog]

#wouldn’t be the 25th craziest thing to have happened with these sentient mops (via @chirpingchorus)

#yeah that's how they ended up with wrongo (via @notafain)

#right next to the time ringo got his head stuck in some railings. you can see a lot of the world from there.#i know this is a joke post and whatnot but hold up lemme just...#yeah you just gotta believe shit cause let me tell you i really didn't think that paul and george went hitchhiking together#but they did! and that's a basic lore fact. but i didn't believe it at first. sounds made up ya know? anyway back to the jokes. (via @entarstellars)

listen the hitchhiking isn't crazy what's fun is that they went to harlech SPECIFICALLY bc it's in the lyrics to men of harlech

#i know this is about the beatles but this also happened with csny. neil was the one in an interdimensionsl rift for a year (1973) (via @tweeterwilbury)

oh thanks for the info

#which is unironically the ringo plot in all of their movies btw (via @blondecasino)

#i'll be real with you guys. the weirder the story is the more likely it's true#story: the beatles kept a pile of george harrison's vomit as a pet while they were living at a grotty german bar. verdict: true (via @moptopper)

#Ringo's interdimensional travel inspired across the universe (via @georgeharrisonsmiling)

#objectively Ringo is the best one to say things about also because he doesn't know (via @varsbaby)

#well yea but its ringo. like if george did it id be like that’s uncharacteristic. but ringo oh yeah sure (via @wronglennon)

#what did you think nowhere man was about (via @constance-dartagnan)

#only real heads know john tried to close the portal over nyc (via @streetlegal1978)

#prev that's why they made that round memorial for him in NYC. It symbolizes the portal (via @scary-ivy)

#have you not seen their movies (via @kuside)

#it's true#he came back Wrongo (via @violet-jessop)

#Yeah obviously#it's where he went after falling through a strange hole in the Sea of Holes (via @bewareofdarkness)

#this entire site is on drugs (via @shewas-agaystripper)

both david and neil got stuck in an interdimensional rift if you think about it (via @tweeterwilbury)

oh there's more

#new beatles movie when (via @nyxnoxxx)

#beatles lore is just cray cray. youre either a normie or on too deep there’s only two quantum states of being a bug fan#oh you dont know about neil aspinall knocking up pete best's mum?#oh you dont know about the seven levels? (via @justlike-awoman)

#would totally believe this happened to Ringo#the universe has been trying and failing to kill him since he was born (via @mooncustafer)

in re bewareofdarkness' tags

#how i sound explaining when john lennon saw a ufo on august 23rd 1974 probably (via @carbuckety)

how HE sounded actually (god bless julian backing him up)

#ringos got the weirdest lore (via @the-mystic)

he's lived the longest -- ample opportunity

beatles lore is so crazy because. people will be like "wait you don't know about the time ringo got stuck in an interdimensional rift for 2 years??" and you just have to assume they're telling the truth

[mango-dot-yum]

There’s been a lot of hate for more recent costumes in Starlight Express, and I think we all just need to appreciate that we no longer have these:

(This is hate, so if you like these costumes good for you but you probably won’t want to read the rest of this)

Duvay is the… least bad, but they may be because I have nothing else to compare her too. I don’t like the gray shoulder things because they just look off, but it could be worse.

And now, Dinah. Honestly, if I were Greaseball I’d leave her too, because what is that outfit?? The front panel of the skirt was removed, the doily was removed, and her leggings were removed. It looks wrong. And the skirt looks weird, too. Her having long sleeves and no leggings make her outfit look unbalanced, with way too much happening up top and basically nothing on the bottom half of her.

I don’t think the problem is even her not having leggings, Expresso Astral didn’t have leggings for her, and it looked fine. I think the problem is the combination of missing leggings and missing skirt parts.

Next up on my complaint list is Pearl. She looks like if a bootleg company made a doll of Pearl. It looks like comparing MLP toys to the show. What I mean to say is, you can tell it’s Pearl, but it doesn’t look like her. They remove the part over her bust that said “OBSERVATION” which, like, okay I guess? But that makes the thing around her neck look strange and like it wasn’t supposed to be there. It looks like they meant to remove that as well, but they forgot. The front panel of her skirt with the “PM” was removed, and the other panels became less pink. My biggest issue with this costume isn’t the costume itself, though, it’s something inconsequential: the wig.

In my opinion, Pearl’s wig is one of the most memorable parts of her costume- it’s why a lot of people don’t like 2018 revision Pearl. And this wig is just so… boring. It’s underwhelming and looks weird with the rest of the costume. I would say it’s because it’s blonde, but my favorite Pearl wig isn’t the typical pink/pink-white-

-so I can’t even say that. The it just doesn’t look like Pearl. The best part of Starlight Express costumes is that they’re flashy and pretty. If I saw someone wearing this wig in public I wouldn’t look twice.

And last(and most definitely least) ,Buffy. Poor, poor, Buffy. I love Buffy, she’s my second favorite coach. But this costume? It’s just so… I don’t even know what to say. She has a bare midriff, the chest box being reduced in size(probably to show more cleavage), but she does have the “napkins” tucked into her belt, which I do like. My main issue is the chest box. That has always been my favorite part of Buffy’s design, the details on it being fun to look at.

But this(as in the Las Vegas and tour costumes, not Bochum 1989 Buffy which was used as an example for the chest box) just looks tacky. Without prior knowledge, I wouldn’t be able to tell what it’s supposed to be, which I think is pretty bad because it’s the main part of her costume. It’s the part that makes it clear she’s a buffet car, without being able to tell what it is, she doesn’t look like Buffy.

I am not a puritan(or at least I hope I’m not), I don’t care about sexual costumes in musical theatre, I’m not trying to say the costumes are bad because they’re not covered head to toe. What I do have an issue with, though, is when sexuality becomes misogyny. Look at the other costumes for these tours/Las Vegas and you’ll see what I mean.

I think it was in bad taste how only the coaches lost significant portions of their costumes. If you’re going to make slutty costumes, make ALL the costumes slutty. Have Greaseball wear little shorts and a crop top or something, I don’t know. But I think it’s weird how only the coaches became more sexual. It’s not “empowering” it’s misogyny(in my opinion)

Anyways, sorry for my rant! I try and stay positive for the most part on here but ARGGH I HATE THESE COSTUMES😭😭

I genuinely did enjoy writing this because I love yapping about Starlight Express(even if it’s negative), so if anyone wants my opinions on specific things please ask me in my replies or my asks :D

[ghostiguro]

{lil ramble}

lately, i’ve noticed a bit of a concerning pattern in the fandom. i’ve seen multiple posts about people complaining about artists drawing particularly female or more femme presenting lambs. which funnily enough, i have not once heard a single complaint about male or more masc presenting lambs, but i digress.

there’s nothing wrong with having a preference, the problem is when you insist that the alternative is wrong or inferior. you can say you like something without also saying, “but this other thing is bad.”

there are so many different lambs out there, go find ones that you like rather than trash on the ones you don’t like.

this is less for the people who have been complaining than it is for people who may feel discouraged by it. i know that someone who goes out of their way to be an asshole isn’t gonna look at this & go, “oh shit you’re so right,” that’s generally not how those kinds of people operate.

it just really sucks to see such a negative attitude brought into a space that is usually really positive. i love that there’s so many different lambs in the community, & i don’t think any of them are bad or wrong by any means. just different.

-

on a much different note; i am working on art, i’m just a bit stuck at the moment. :,)

i’ve been working on designs for all of the mini bosses & all of my little cultists, which has taken me a loooong ass time. & then i want to eventually give my lamb & goat a proper introduction, cuz i haven’t really said a lot about them. i have endless notes about them & their story, i just haven’t figured out how to share them. so.. i’m working on that. <.< i still don’t know what their names should be either.. blah.

but anyway yeah, little update. :b

[pun-ishment888]

Funniest thing about all this to me is that, even if we assume all the allegations are true(which I see no reason to distrust), there were just so many outs for Iskall. But he kept picking the wrong dialogue option every time.

"He has been underpaying his employees severely and being manupilative", "yeah I sucked at managing stuff and my attempt to keep things casual resulted in very bad expectations from me, and a lack of professionalism, because I ignored the inherent power imbalance. I'll be staying away for a bit as I rethink my approach."

"He has been hitting on his employees and being weird" "I didnt think I was making them uncomfortable, I misread the room, I apologize for that, that wasnt my intention."

"Iskall there have been some complaints about you, can you hop on call to talk things out?" "Oh hey hermits, yeah, sure, I'll hop on in an hour, afterall I trust you guys after all these years"

"Hey guys, Iskall here, I did bad, at the time there were a lot of emotions and I didnt want to take accountability so I took some time for myself, now that Ive processed the emotions, Im back to apologize, and I hope to still make entertaining videos for you guys."

Literally ANYTHING other than:

"There are hermits with hidden motivations, I am the victim of a witch hunt and I'll be seeking vengeance now that Im free to speak my mind, they slandered my name when they uhhhhh anyway, they are after me for no reason which is why I refused to explain anything to them since the beginning and went to the cops, which wasnt suspicious at all."

Its like he was handed an exam with 50 True/False questions and got a 0/50.

[starlightrosa]

Outlet

With thanks to @mari2akary for this ADORABLE idea!

Summary: Valentino is pissed off, like usual. Vox is sent to pacify him. It ends, for once, in a rather unexpected fashion.

Warnings: Canon-friendly language, severe swear warning, Valentino in general. (If not comfy seeing him written, please skip past and take care of yourself.) All SFW.

Word Count: 1.6k

Enjoy!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been a relatively quiet morning. In the tower belonging to Hell’s fearsome overlords, the Vees, Vox was in his hideout playing around with cameras and feeds so as to get the best angle for spying on Alastor yet again. At least, that’s how he assumed the morning would go. Hell comes with its problems, and one was bubbling up faster than the flat-screen could have assumed.

“VOX!” came the voice of Velvette, crackling over the monitor of the TV overlord. Honestly, you’d think the Brit would have learned to solve her own problems by now, surely she could just-

“VOX! I need you up here, NOW!”

“Whatever could be the problem, my dear?” Vox asked, turning his back to the British woman, sipping from a mug of coffee as he scrolled through his phone.

“Your little boy toy. Get up here now and cool him off before he rips apart the models that I need for MY SHOW! Damn it, Valentino!” Velvette yelled, before the digital screen went blank.

Vox lifted himself out of his chair, his charismatic smile gone from his face now.

“Oh boy, here I go. Off to go see Valentino. Hey, hey, hey! Fuck my life.” Vox said, ranting to himself as he stepped aboard the lifting pad to take him up to where Valentino was, in the efforts of cooling his anger.

When Vox got up to the suite that the Vees all shared, he saw something that should have surprised him, but it really didn’t. Red smoke blanketed the area, and there was a very angry Valentino, ranting and raving to the air with saliva flying from his mouth in his outrage.

“THAT UNGRATEFUL WHORE!” the moth demon screamed aloud, throwing a glass of… whatever he was drinking. And it would have hit Vox in the face, had the TV demon not quickly stepped out of the path of oncoming liqueur.

Vox had gotten used to a lot of Valentino’s mannerisms by now. The moth Overlord was a very unstable sort, with a temper more fierce and fiery than the eternal flames that ravaged the wasteland of the Pride Ring. So this once again came as no surprise.

“Um, which whore are we talking about exactly?” Vox asked, his hands behind his back. He looked mildly bored of this tantrum already, and if Valentino was anything to go by, this was only getting started.

“Fucking Angel Dust!” Valentino snarled. “Who the hell else would I be talking about?! That fucking SLUT walked out on me! ME!!!!” he continued, pacing around the room. “I fucking made him! I’m gonna remind him of just who he belongs to!” he said, rifling through the storage cupboards and pulling out two shotguns, one yellow and the other pink.

“Now, which of these compliments my coat?” Valentino asked to himself. Vox just chuckled.

“Val…” he crooned, though his charismatic drawl switched to something sharper, offering one warning and one only. “You’re not going over there.” he says.

“And why the fuck not? Angel is mine. I own him, so I can do what I goddamn want with-!”

“VAL!” Vox shouted, startling the moth into an angry yet disbelieving silence. “I said you’re not going over there, so you’re NOT FUCKING GOING.”

Valentino fell back on the sofa, kicking his legs in anger and pouting like a goddamn child. Sometimes Vox wondered why in the hell he was dating such a petulant, whining man. He shouldn’t care about any of this, realistically.

But leaving Valentino to stew in anger without any way to cool off was not a very good idea. Vox swore he was still finding bullets in the walls the last time Valentino got angry, and the carpenter’s prices were way too damn high for Vox’s liking anyway.

“You need to control yourself.” Vox said. Val scoffed.

“And how in the fuck do you expect me to do THAT?!”

“I don’t know, read a damn book? Play darts?” Vox guessed, rattling off some casual activities as an idea, before he saw the look on Val’s face. Like he was hatching some kind of plan, as the moth overlord quickly sat up and kept his eyes on Vox the entire time.

“Uh, Val? Why are you looking at me like that?” Vox enquired. Suddenly, the TV demon felt a little worried.

“You know, Voxy… I might have a way to take out my anger. If I can’t use Angel as my outlet… then you’re gonna have to do.” the moth demon said, before tugging Vox to him. Vox stumbled forwards and landed across Val’s lap. And usually Vox didn’t quite mind being in this position, if you get my drift. But the way Val was looking at him, not with lust, but with sheer mischief did more to unsettle Vox’s nerves.

Vox felt the moth demon working him out of his jacket, leaving him in his red and black striped vest. Of all the fucking times to wear the short-sleeved one. And Vox quickly began regretting it even more when he felt one of Valentino’s hands gripping his wrists and pulling them above his head.

“Val.” Vox warned, though the sharp warning was lost in the way his voice wavered. “Don’t even think about it.”

“Oh, I’m thinkin’ about it, guapo.” Valentino responded. “I really am.” he continued, his voice a cat-like purr.

Vox opened his mouth to say something else, but an uncharacteristic squeal left him as Valentino gave the other overlord no warning and began digging his claws into the hollows of his underarms with his free upper hand.

“VAHAHAHAHAHAL!!!!” Vox cried out, squirming in the moth demon’s arms. Val just tightened his hold around the other, refusing to let him go.

Valentino just laughed. “Where are you trying to go? No escaping me, Voxie~” he crooned, enjoying the sight of his boyfriend squirming in his arms far more than he would admit. Vox was enjoyable to get his hands on, in many more ways than one.

“D-Don’t! Val, don’t! Don’t!” Vox begged, wriggling like a worm in his boyfriend’s arms. Val only grinned, every sharp fang in his mouth fully on show, even the gold one.

“Don’t what, Voxie~?” he questioned.

“Tickle me!” Vox giggled out, too caught up in the tickles to properly register what Valentino implied in the moment. Oh, he fell for it. And Vox soon realised and attempted to backtrack, though Val was undeterred. “Wahahahait wahahait WAIT- ACK!”

“Begging is always rewarded with me, guapo.” Valentino crooned. “This goes on until I’m not angry with Angel Dust anymore. And because you made me mention that slut again, that’s an extra minute of me wrecking your shit.” he finished, hearing Vox gasp at the suggestion.

“V-Val!” Vox cackled, his eyes screwed shut. “Thahahat’s nohohot FAIR!”

“I don’t think I asked for your opinion, Voxie. Now quiet down before I double your time.” Valentino threatened with a rare glint of playfulness in his reddish eyes.

“Gohohoho somewhere else!” Vox pleaded. If he kept getting tickled here in the underarms, he was going to overheat, quite literally. Having a literal TV for a head seemed like a fun concept, but it meant that the fun of blushing was thrown out the damn window and instead there came a very real possibility of Vox overheating from exertion, or blowing a fuse due to overuse of his energy. And a reboot wasn’t exactly how he wanted to spend his afternoon, and he was fairly certain Val wanted that even less.

“Alright, fine. Whiny-ass.” Val said with a loud sigh as he pondered where to go next. Then he got a good idea. He released his hold on Vox’s wrists to gather hands under his back, and flipped Vox over.

Vox landed with a muffled ‘oof’, now lying on his stomach. Valentino looked down at Vox. “You know, Vox… I could go for a snack.”

“Then gehehet Kihihitty!” Vox babbled between chuckles that bubbled up out of his throat. Kitty was their robot who did whatever any of the Vees wanted without any fuss.

“No, she’s not needed.” Val purred. He gnashed his teeth playfully at Vox. “I was thinkin’ something else.”

“Lihihihike what?” Vox asked, not liking the evil smile on Valentino’s face.

“Ribs.” Is all he says, before he got Vox’s little striped vest up, revealing the electric blue skin, as he dipped his head, enjoying Vox’s pleads. Valentino had stumbled upon this spot a few times ago, and it was a favourite spot to get the TV demon crumbling.

“No, no, no. Val, please! Don’t, DON’T-!”

Val’s teeth met Vox’s ribs, nibbling along the ticklish bones. Vox shrieked as soon as he felt it, cackling and clawing into Valentino’s shirt with the freedom of his hands.

“VAHAHAHAHAL!!!” Vox screeched. He couldn’t think straight, and his face was getting dangerously hot. If this didn’t stop, he might just burn out. “STOHOHOHOP!”

“Awww, but I’m having so much fuuuun tickling your back. I kind of want to keep going.” Valentino shrugs, now going at his ribs with one set of hands, and the lower set scratching at his underarms. “Not like you can stop me anyway, since you’re laughing your ass off at the moment.”

Vox babbled. “I AHAHAHAM GOHONNA OVERHEHEHEHEAT!!! VAHAL, PLEHEHEHEASE!!”

Valentino debated, but then he sighed, letting go of Vox. “Fiiiiine.” he says, before grinning. “But this continues later tonight. Don’t think I’m done with you yet, Voxie.” he says, the Overlord getting up to go to the kitchen.

Vox sighed, leaning back into the comfort of the armchair. He really needed a nap to cool his circuits off. His eyes fluttered shut faster than he wanted, the last thing he saw before falling asleep was Valentino rooting around the fridge.

And if Valentino left the dozing Vox a sandwich and a glass of water while he slept, that would be just between them, and with only slight mockery from Velvette at some point. Such is life in Hell.

The End!

(Guapo - handsome. Spanish hehe)

[terrinle]

first and foremost, i want to note, as i did in the post, that this is not about me saying gender segregation is good-- i dont think it is. i think that people should be able to access things the that they need and it shouldn't be based on gender. but that is not what i was talking about lol

this post was prompted by seeing a guy say that he had "no reason" to be excluded from womens spaces, and i just think thats kind of ridiculous, because obviously there is one reason why he would be excluded from a womens space: him being a man. that is, in fact, a reason, lol. whether you think thats a good reason is not the question. the question is: if being a man is an invalid reason to be excluded from a womens space, then what reason is there that at all that anyone can be excluded from a womens space?

if youre not out yet, then idk why you wouldnt already be allowed to go into womens spaces? like lmao. like obviously if people think youre a cis woman, they'll allow you into womens spaces? this is a complete nonstarter lol

with a lot of these, you yourself admitted they're coed/accesible by cis men, so i dont know why you brought them up? they arent relevant. medical procedures, though systemically gendered in a way that can exclude us, are not womens spaces in and of themselves, as evidenced by the existence of male doctors in these fields?

my question to you with many of these is: okay, so your theoretical guy is older and hes not out and isnt transitioning and maybe doesnt even want to. i can understand the argument for his inclusion. but does that mean that EVER trans man should be included in womens sports/dorms/etc entirely on the basis that we're trans men? because thats the argument that bothers me, the idea that, no matter what, we should be included in womens spaces, even in cases where there are existing alternatives for men that we can easily access? like what other reason could there be except for our agab?

i dont see why youd have to divorce your lesbian wife (a marriage is not a womens space lol), but i could see why she would divorce you for being a man and i also think thats fine lol. i think that if lesbians do not want men, including trans men, in their spaces, that should be respected lol. sorry! hanging out with your lesbian friends isnt a "womens space" even if it is a space with all women, lol. an event for sapphic women is not necessary for survival. this is another example wherein you have so many caveats and it feels so granual that i dont know what you want me to say. yeah, maybe in that specific case, sure, yeah, but not every trans man fits that description-- probably, most dont! should those of us who do not be included on the basis of being trans men?

honestly, i dont care if you want to go into lesbian spaces, but i do wish that trans men could ever seem to acknowledge that the whole "we've always been here 😌" is not a value neutral statement in this context. we've always been there because of biological essentialism and transphobia lol, the same kind that excludes trans women from those spaces, both historically and today. i realize a lot of trans men identify as lesbians which i think is whatever, im not gonna tell you what to do with your life, but idk, acting like there is a reason besides our agab that we're allowed to do that leaves a bad taste in my mouth every time i see it being said without so much as a nod to that fact

and yeah. of course i think men should be allowed to access dv and sa related services, shelters, and

anyway. i know i missed some of these but many of them were completely irrelevant so you'll forgive me lol, but i have to cook dinner now. i hope you understand that, as i said, i dont support gender segregation! my question was: since gender segregation does exist, then what other reason besides gender is there to exclude them?

okay my question, genuinely, to trans men in the transandrophobia space, is this:

upon what grounds can someone justifiably be excluded from a womens space if not their gender? if trans men should be allowed into womens spaces, then why not cis men? i mean, theyre men, we're men, and if we're allowed in, why shouldnt they be? "they dont face the same struggles that we do!" lmao some of them do!

its just perplexing why the statement "the only reason someone can justifiably be excluded from a gender segregated space is that they are not the gender that the space is for" is so fucking offensive to people all on its own? like yeah yeah our struggles but like we are still men, right? and these spaces are for women, right? so why is "you are being excluded for being a man" when you are one treated like this absurdly offensive thing or like theres "no reason" for it. there is one! youre a guy lol.

whether you think that you should be excluded for being a guy or not is not the question im asking here-- its that, if being a man is not a justifiable reason to exclude someone from a womens space, then what is lmao?

[witchyliterature]

PLEASE PLEASEEE could you do like unreciprocated love w touya i’d be so grateful 🙁🙁 maybs based off of the song chest pain by malcolm todd or promise by laufey either oneee! n i have no idea what format it could be so whatever you think fits best :)

this is actually my first time writing proper angst sooo IDK. i chose promise bc i know that song better which made it easier to write to. i think this was ok? I REALLY DONT KNOW but yeah. anyways, it’s post war period, rehabilitated touya au, mentions of death, reader is a little mean to touya but one could argue it’s justifiable (depends on perspective, idk im just the author yall). did a normal one shot format cus i can only do 10 images on mobile and i knew i wanted this to be a lot longer (it’s only 1.6k words but still). touya living with shoto canon cus i said so. use of the name dabi but only for metaphorical comparisons. gender neutral reader. hints to musician dabi (like one line). uhhh yeah i think that’s all, HOPE U LIKE

promise; touya todoroki

dabi was never a romantic.

the bubbling burnt feeling of hatred consumed him wholly and swallowed any other emotion - he was a vessel for hatred, for not only did he carry his own, but also his family’s who couldn’t express their own feelings toward endevour.

yet, touya found out he was.

after the war and a long rehabilitation process, he had realised there are other things to life, hatred was not the only emotion in sight, it was not the only emotion he deserved.

so when touya found out that he had feelings for you, the only friend he had ever made by himself after the war that didn’t have any villainous intent, he had been terrified.

he couldn’t explain it at first, why his heart would leap when speaking to you, or why he tried to hard to impress you when you both went to the gym, or even why he had made a song about you and all the lyrics sounded oddly romantic.

then, when even his socially inept brother could tell that he had some form of feelings for you, it finally clicked.

so then, he made a promise, to distance himself until these childish feelings resolved themselves.

touya didn’t deserve to love or be loved, not after all the destruction he caused or all the suffering he made others feel - even his own family.

for 16 days, he avoided you like the plague. airing your calls and texts, avoiding you at work (which was damn near impossible) and when he did have to talk to you, he kept it short and sweet, even then, his palms got sweaty and his smile would grow double its size when you were around.

but, at some point, he broke his promise.

he didn’t exactly understand why he did, he just saw someone that looked like you when he was walking home from work and decided that enough was enough.

shoto had hyped him up, telling him that this was going to be fine, you had to have want him as well after everything, or at least you would give him a chance.

touya’s confidence was built, he knew what he was going to do, he was going to ask you out.

on call though, he was still a shy little boy on the inside of it all.

leading for him and shoto to be sat on the kitchen island seats across from one another, calling your number while putting you on speaker.

“touya! oh my goodness, here i thought you were going to end our friendship! what’s going on, why have you been ignoring me?” your sweet voice rang through, it felt like he could see your small cute pout as you said that, hand on hip attempting to look serious.

“i would never, i’m sad you would think that.” touya chuckled.

“yeah well, ignoring me for 16 days is really something, you know?!” you laughed.

“my deepest apologies, you can burn me at the stake if you truly want to.” touya responded smugly.

“i would but that seems like it would turn you on.” you scoffed, he laughed in response.

“alright then, but you won’t get to know why i called you.” touya sighed playfully.

“do tell oh great touya takamani!” you said with faux respect.

that was the last name he told you, the one the government gave to him. they allowed him to keep his first name since not many people remembered him at touya anyways, as well as to allow him to keep at least some part of his identity.

“listen, you’re like really stupid sometimes, and it gets me angry sometimes. you talk way too much and you love spoiling movies for me.” touya stated.

shoto looked at him confusingly, touya flinched as he realised he was just insulting you and you were remaining silent.

“wait- i- ugh, i didn’t meant it like that. i had this whole other part to it but…” touya stammered.

“it’s ok, i know you didn’t mean it. you’re terrible at talking about your feelings but, i’ll be patient with you, i always will be.” you said calmly.

shoto looked at touya shockingly, he had met you once or twice and understood… the physical attraction to it. but hearing you talk to his brother in such a fashion made him realise where touya’s love for you come from.

touya’s own heart fluttered tremendously at that, you were always paitent with him. even now when he has ignored you for over two weeks and you never shouted or screamed, you just, waited.

“i just mean that, those traits are things i don’t even hate. i love them, and you, i love it all.” touya blurted out, his legs bouncing with anticipation while shoto gave a thumbs up.

“aw, you’re so sweet! i love you too, touya!” you responded.

“no, i mean it as though, i love you… romantically. i want to go on dates with you and take you to your favourite places and think of a future with you. in fact, i don’t even care what we do, i just want to be near you while we do those things. i.. don’t exactly understand how these things go, ive never been in a relationship or have seen a successful one other than my brother’s friends but even then i don’t really see them. i’m willing to try, as long as im yours, im willing to do anything you want me to.” touya had explained, his gruff voice softening out as he spoke.

as he spoke, it felt like you could see the starts twinkle in his eye, the ones that only show themselves when he looks at you with that look. full of love and hope, with his heart raw and beating on his sleeve. yeah, you could imagine it vividly.

and you hated it.

you hated how you can see him gazing in his house dreaming of a future with you, or how you can imagine his blushing while thinking of you, or those moments in work where his eyes are stuck on his figure and you pretend to not acknowledge it.

because you did not want him to think of you that way, you never desired to be his and you never held out hope of you two being together past friendship.

and you didn’t care if that hurt him.

“touya, i hope you’re not serious.” you laughed pitifully.

shoto and touya froze.

“i-i am?” touya responded slowly, as though he knew what was coming. he was in the danger zone and the alarm bells with ringing violently as he pretended that they were just precautionary measures.

“i know that you’re dabi.” was all you said in response.

touya’s eyes widened, his breathing quickened and his hand ran through his white messy hair.

“you do? damn i was-“

“don’t play this off as a joke. listen, i didn’t care that much when i first learned a couple months ago. i valued our friendship despite your past, but expecting a relationship between us is downright delusional. even if i were to give you a chance, it would never last. that war you started because of your own daddy issues caused a lot of my families death and financial issues, i can respect the change in behaviour and i don’t mind keeping you as a friend but i could never love a villain.” the sting of your venomous words seeped into touya’s bloodstream and stopped the rhythmic beat of his heart.

he felt dizzy and lost, he heard you speak again but it became a blur as his vision started to blur from the sting of tears the bullied its way out of his eyes.

touya was angry, sad, heartbroken and anything else under the sun. worst of all? he couldn’t even blame you. you were well within your right to reject him for that reason and he hated that.

the familiar bubbling started to boil in his gut again, his default emotion to any bad situation that was all consuming and ever so comforting in its perverse ways.

it was like a hug from his father, Lord knows that he never received that when he was younger much but the one time he did, the one time affection was shown to him, it felt like this. touya felt like everything he ever despised, all the darkness within his enveloped him within its grasp.

it was reliable, trustworthy and never lied him.

love wasn’t, it was sickening and tight on the heart. it was faulty and pretended to be there for you in times of need, but, like everything in life, was just a trick that got him vulnerable enough to make him tick.

touya finally locked back into reality, realising now that shoto and you were arguing. he has never seen his stoic brother that angry, but he didn’t know why. why would he defend the very villain that ruined his childhood? dabi was the very thing he seeked to destroy and it’s not like dabi and touya were that seperate.

touya was just dabi with a false sense of security.

“it’s fine, honestly. sorry for bothering you y/n, hang up sho’” touya suddenly spoke.

shoto hung up the phone quickly, placing it down as he looked at his brothers eyes. once full of life, stars and love looking exactly like it did eight years ago.

“are you-“

“i’m fine.” no he wasn’t, of course touya wasn’t, but what more could he do.

he shouldn’t have broken his promise, he should’ve stayed away and listened to dabi - the anti romantic voice in his head telling him to stay away.

because now touya realised now more than ever, that while it hurts be something, it was worse to be nothing with you.

[campbyler]

Hello!!

I’ve had an unpublished modern au byler fic in the works for an embarrassing amount of time and I’ve noticed that you two talk about characterization a lot, which has been my main struggle. I’ve figured out choices to make for characters and how they relate to choices and characteristics of the canon characters in the show, but I’m not sure if the reasoning behind those choices and traits will translate to readers.

I love the fic and I feel like y’all did a great job with making those reasonings clear in your writing without directly saying it, so I’d love to know if you have any specific tricks for that!

Also sorry if this kind of formal, I’m stuck in email mode with finals coming up :|

hello! soooo sorry this is such a late response — i was thinking it over when it came in and then i ended up talking about something similar on another ask and totally blanked 😔 thank you so much for asking for our input, i’ll try to be as concise as i can! (<- edit from future me who has finished typing up her answer to this ask: famous last words. you were not concise. at all. oh my god i’m sorry) i know you said you already made your initial characterization choices and everything so please bear with me while i word vomit and rehash what was probably part of your thought process anyways just to be able to follow my own train of thought lol

some general thoughts here that thea and i have been mulling over for the last few months regarding how we’ve written our fic and choices we have made for it: we’re both well aware that acswy is not everyone’s cup of tea for many reasons, but i’m specifically bringing this up in response to your ask because every once in a while, we do see someone refer to our mike and will as being written out of character, whether or not that’s a deterrent for them in reading. and i want to make it clear that this doesn’t bother us and nothing im about to say is meant to sound defensive or like we’re making a case to people who feel this way — we have our reasons for making the decisions that we did and also already heavily retconned our og concept for them on account of it having been pretty ooc at the time, even to us, so we’re confident with where we are now — but it has made us think about what people actually consider to be “out of character.” this brings me to my first point re: characterization which is, to us, the importance of differentiating between something that the character in the source material doesn’t/probably wouldn’t do versus something that is more of a direct contradiction to the character themselves. for example, we’ve seen people say (often while reading for the first time) that will is ooc specifically in the first couple chapters of acswy, a big reason being because he’s “mean to mike.” it is, of course, vastly different from how he acts in the show and is probably a slightly jarring dynamic to be dropped into right off the bat, especially since the entire premise of the fic is that the reader has almost zero context for why he’s behaving this way, and even more so at the beginning of the fic before his and mike’s relationship develops further. to me and thea as writers, the importance lies more so in the context for it all: how mike and will would turn out after growing up without each other as best friends, with a lot of the cultural pressures of the 1980s removed but having some new ones of the 2010s/20s introduced; not going to high school together, being in the same friend group for years and getting closer over time with many interests in common, but also facing a lot of conflict and having that friend group be geographically separated while a lot of it goes down.

and with this context, what we would consider to be ooc would be if we just like. made will a straight up DICK or something lol. no nuance involved, constantly berating mike with no reason to do so, even with their unknown history, like just ragging on him all the time and never backing down, even when mike isn’t engaging (side note: giant personal pet peeve of mine that max constantly gets written this way but i digress). we see in the show that will is often snarky and sarcastic and will stand up for himself when needed, especially with mike — which imo is another sign of will’s trust in him and their bond, that he can be honest with mike and not fear genuine retribution, and in acswy, he knows mike will meet him where he’s at. he sometimes isn’t afraid to hit a sore spot, but he would never ever just be a jerk for the hell of it -> we even see him apologize after their fight in s4, despite it clearly being a very emotional moment for him and a lot of truth behind what he was saying. whether he intended for it to come out that way or not, he still felt bad for reacting that way and apologized to mike’s face about it. likewise, there’s a reason acswy will acts the way he does with mike specifically, and we were also intentional with making mike match his energy like he does in canon, which will counts on, even — the way these boys BICKER, oh my god — and he has his own ways of pushing will’s buttons which prove to be very effective. even in the early chapters there are a lot of moments of softness and real friendship between them that (we hope!!) make it pretty clear that it takes some effort to maintain this facade, that there is more than enough of their “canon” bond and dynamic and chemistry where being friends and having fun together is a much more natural state to exist in, and is where they usual end up during those brief periods where they let that mask slip. same principle if we had made mike some uber-jerk who had completely different interests than he does in the show (we are so glad that book annotator and zelda fan mike wheeler is ringing true for you all ☺️), or someone who’s super self confident and popular and charming (outside of will’s very unreliable pov) once he and will start hooking up. i think most people would look at that and look back at canon mike wheeler and say yeah that is Not my mike, because making will an actual asshole or making mike any of these things would be going against core character traits that are central to their arcs in the show. will wouldn’t be will if he was generally a confrontational dick, and mike wouldn’t be mike if he was popular and exuded self confidence and so on. that’s just not them! so to summarize, i guess the question to us is more along the lines of “would they ‘not do this’ in the show out of circumstance/lack of necessity (e.g: canon byler going to the same schools until s4, never having a reason for rivalry to develop, growing up living in close proximity to each other and all of their mutual friends, etc) or would they ‘not do this’ in the show because it’s antithetical to the way they have been written?” we find it much more interesting to put a character in a situation and then essentially work backwards in a way to see how they would react to it, rather than putting them in situations that correlate to things we have seen before, and therefore would probably result in them reacting in a way we have seen them do before.

and now coming back to what i think you were actually asking: i think my biggest tip to making those references without it being said outright is honestly just to have faith in both your readers And the creative choices you make. which sounds like a bit of a cop out answer but i simply can’t understate the important of trusting your readers to pick up what you’re putting down, and to trust that they’ll read between the lines for you. a lot of my favorite characterization moments in aus are ones that are really really subtle, where a character does or says something that is clearly a callback to something in the source media, but it isn’t explained in a way that’s actually calling attention to it — it always seems much more natural that way, like whatever they did is just a progression of who they are in that story instead of the author trying to make a point or force a connection. just off the top of my head a small example might be how i see so many authors in non-magic/no upside down aus still make will really struggle with the cold, often just as a throwaway line or paragraph which imo is much more effective for me than trying to explain why he’s feeling this way. or having him enjoy the same media as in the show in a slightly varied and less direct way (e.g: being into the new star wars shows as a continuation of his canon interests, putting him in theater club to play off of the posters we saw in his room, etc). i think it also helps to have something specific in mind that you’re trying to tie back, like an important moment for that character’s story or something that stood out in the source material. like, i love writing lucas and dustin bickering over stupid stuff bc it takes me back to them in s1 in the principal’s office or s2 in general, or one of my personal favs in my own fics was one where i had will be on a constant rotation of fun patterned socks. he’s creative, he’s an artist, it’s (hopefully) a pretty clear connection to make once i write it in, and i really do think a modern version of him would get a kick out of something like that! and sometimes people just won’t pick up on what you’re trying to say and that’s okay too! everyone reads fics a little differently so some connections might be more obvious to some people than others and so on. from my experience as a reader, i find it pretty easy to connect the dots between an intentional and thoughtful moment of characterization vs one that doesn’t quite hit the nail on the head, or the author felt the need to spell out for the reader which maybe took me out of the moment a little too much or something. to me, making those choices and translating canon to an au is honestly the hardest part, especially with a modern au and a show like st that is So defined by the period it’s set in, so if you’ve already got that out of the way i genuinely think you have the rest of it in the bag as well. unless you worked through it in the month it took me to get to this in which case i am so so so sorry LOL

okay that’s been my word vomit of the day, hopefully any of this made sense or was useful at all, but thank you again for your kind words and support and for thinking to ask us! always always happy to chat writing, even if it takes me a million words to do it 😗

[marythequeen]

hello guys, i'm here to talk about leah toole's fictional book on mary i of england's. it's called the saddest princess.

at first, i want to clarify that i am highly aware that this book is fictional and not a biography. so you don't need to say "hey but it's fictional"

also, before reading her book, leah toole was someone i really liked. i used to follow her on tiktok and was really excited to read her book. however as you can understand, i am very, very disappointed.

let's start.

just after i had read the prologue i knew that many things would piss me off throughout the book because it was horrendous.

the vilification of queen mary is outdated now and seeing even the people that claim to like her doing this, made me feel awful. according to countless reports, in her death bed, she was peaceful and her conscience clean. the people that she had executed were mainly guilty of treason and many others were executed without her knowledge. i don't think that feeling guilty about this would be her main concern.

but do you know who was rather frightened and surrounded by guilt? her half sister elizabeth.

apart from this, if you ever saw a video of leah toole's, you probably know that she's a great hater of the spanish princess because of its inaccurate portrayals. mind you, the spanish princess tv show never ever claimed that it was historically accurate or something like that but leah toole was MAD (and rightfully so!! i totally agreed with her.) about it anyway. so imagine my disappointment when i started to read her book eagerly then realized that it, in many aspects, was a cheap copy of the tv show.

"there was no lone for this useless baby girl." i mean, really? that scene and almost everything about it was in the spanish princess. AND this whole scene could be proved wrong with countless reports. do i think katharine of aragon suffered from a kind of postpartum depression? i absolutely do. but do i think she HATED her own daughter for years? no because that's not what happened in reality.

again, this is a historical fiction book and it doesn't have to be historically accurate but it's called a hypocrisy when you criticize another material because of the same thing you did yourself.

(ps. katharine of aragon had blue eyes, not dark brown.)

mary's birth scene was AWFUL. henry saying mary is a useless girl was highly inaccurate. writing such things while mary's reputation is STILL unfairly blackened is very unnecessary.

"katherine had tried to love her daughter. but no matter how hard she tried, nothing the girl did held any meaning in katherine's eyes." are you kidding me??

also having mary curse constantly? this woman didn't know the meaning of whore until she was forty something. i can't even imagine her saying words such as bastard, harlot, whore etc. (in the book she called anne boleyn names when in reality she simply called her that woman. which is respectful enough.) especially when she used the word bastard when she was nine? now c'mon! throughout the book, the author is obviously influenced by the spanish princess tv show, even though she'd been very critical about the show. there's a pretty word for situations like this :) and it's called hypocrisy.

and *that* scene with duke philip? even the most passionate mary hater wouldn't write something like this. that was worse than wattpad, worse than ao3. (if you didn't read the book, take a deep breath, she had sex with him. again, did not happen in reality.)

apart from all of this, the only thing that i've liked about this book is clearly seeing that mary wasn't as forgiving as her mother was. because that's what actually happened. long story short, i was eager to read the other books of this series but i don't think that i'll be reading the rest. i am so very disappointed with this. it was such a waste of time. and i have to tell you that i am also incredibly sad because i used to enjoy her content a lot.

there are many more issues about this book but unfortunately i don't have enough time or will to live to write a detailed review but i think this'll do anyway.

lastly, at least there are very few quotes that i've liked and would want you to see.

—chapuys shrugged, "it would seem the king himself is struggling to separate the two religions," he said, "and his newest testaments have received mixed reactions from his council. i believe that in his heart he remains a catholic, but he does not wish to be told by anyone whether it be the pope or his best advisor - what he can and cannot do."

—"of all the women in my father's life, i have survived him the longest. and that alone is a great achievement."

—"i survived my father's tyranny for all my thirty-three years. this edward seymour could not scare me if he turned up at my doorstep dressed up as the devil himself."