#anyways its was less then £10 so i had to get it even if dont get the rest
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#personal#keep being like. if Only i had talked to him sooner. if Only i had been Friendlier sooner. but its like#Realistically.... probably wasnt ready. and also like. itd have to happen after school was over anyway bc 1. um i need to focus on school#and 2. how Awkward if i asked him out n he said no. or say we broke up or soemthing#like there were weeks i saw him every day. aint no way... i could handle the awkwardness of that#so ok ok ok. everything is fine JFJFJKFKFKFMFMFMFMFMF#i just have to remember not to get in my own head about it#like if i wanna message him i just should.....#its just..... hhhhHHhhhhh whyd this have to happen to me at 29. i could have been a happy spinster thank u NFJFJFJFJJFJFJFJF#but now ik what having an actual crush is like and oh wow is it painful. but also beautiful n fun. i just...... and lets face it this is#more than a crush. like its definitely Like like but i dont wanna say the Real L Word bc it seems..... idk JDJDJJDJD#but ive definitely um.... fallen. ya. ew JDJDKDJKDKDKDKDKS#but im just gonna follow my gut or whatever the fuck has been guiding me bc things have worked out so far#and like it wouldnt have without his participation. like ya....#im just like... what if he Forgets about me or like everything fizzles out#but then its like i Know if i see him again itll all come back.#bc in the summer i tried so hard to get over him (and kinda succeeded)... only to see him again in class and be like oh fuck oh no and the#n That Dinner. that was the final blow. i was so overwhelmed i got lost on the way home#which... the restaurant we were at is less than 10 mins from my house so you can imagine the uh Overwhelmingness#i cant even remember the original point of this but. i think we'll find a way ....... i say we but i should say 'i' bc until he tells me#that he likes me im gonna have to like Not Assume. hhhh#it doesnt help either that ppl were bringing up 'hes just not that into you' on twt bc Now im like#oh God. am i in that kind of situation???? i doubt it tho. i think hes just reserved. GAH. whatever happens happens
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attempting another raglan knitwear item [screaming and crying car crash sound effect cat yowling glass breaking]
#so far have had no luck with raglans. right now. i have the right amt of stitches just not in the right places#but its ok bc it 1 misplaced stitch which should be in the front but fsr is in the back. no harm done i can live w 1 st#im mostly also bad at being patient enough to achieve gauge#like . its ok i have a 90% accurate stitch gauge and a 115% row gauge#which like is perfectly plenty but i am gonna have to do some quick math later on bc it says to knit until it measures 12 cm#but there are still some 20 odd rows to go (with increases) and im already at 5 cm#and the gauge also said 22 rows = 10 cm so like idk i do think something's not quite right there vis a vis measurement but whatever#i just really hope it works out pls god let it work out im using such a cute yarn combo#im holding 5 strands of yarn btw which is so fucking stupid especially bc one of the yarns is one i recuperated from a sweater and split#horrendously but its SO beautiful its like a yellow cotton polyester blend (or viscose icr) and its like silky soft and gorgeous#but also entirely split into like 6 strands or smth plus the shiny strands that make it so soft keep getting caught on my dry hands#and i dont even have that dry hands but like anyway point being im giving myself a headache inducing task#and i hope it works out#i also should perhaps do a crochet raglan cause its . easier. and i care slightly less abt crochet so i wouldnt mind fucking up
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today 2 years ago i was in america and i had the worst hangover of my life and i was in a waffle house with my friend in awkward silence bc we’d fought in a stranger’s kitchen the night before and the server refilled my water for the 5th time while i fought to swallow half a forkful of hashbrowns and she said “i know that look, y’all had a good time at the superbowl last night” and i was thinking actually we had a mediocre time at a nerd bar where u throw darts and all the drinks r named weird things and anyway my friend gives the fakest laugh ive ever heard followed by “yep we sure did” like are we in a CW show right now what was that line delivery and also what even is the superbowl i was born here and should know but honestly i’ve always just pictured everyone gathering at a comically large bowl of cereal but her nametag says leslie and she’s really nice and she’s refilling my water for the 6th time so yeah sure whatever i’m a red blooded american i’ll be anything for leslie in this moment anything and she tells us stories about working at bars downtown and my friend tells me bad jokes and i feel a little better even though my heart is kind of withering away because my flight is in 17 hours and theres not enough time never enough time i won’t see him for another year and a half and i won’t ever see leslie again and if i ever run into the italian stranger who fell in love with me over darts then it won’t be the same because we won’t be dancing and i’m sitting in a waffle house while the sun sets and i’m sweating gin and tequila and my flight is in 16 hours and i have so many goodbyes to say in this
city because when i was fifteen somebody threw my glass heart onto the floor of my childhood house and bits of it shattered everywhere and fell into the cracks of the floorboards and behind the fridge and i’ll never ever get them out much less back together but i feel like ive been trying for eight years all the same and my flight is in 15 hours but maybe if my friend brings me home now i can spend three of those looking for more shards even though i’ll cut my hand because time never wore down any of the hurt because time might heal wounds but it cant really do jack shit about a metaphysical glass shard its still gonna make me bleed and my friend brings me home and we curl up beside each other in my childhood bedroom thats too small for us it was really a supply room but it became my bedroom when i was eleven and i painted it blue and put up stickers of fish and never took them down but someone someday will take them down and hopefully the house burns to the ground before anyone can touch them theyre mine i grew up here theyre mine dont touch them dont please dont please please please i grew up here and my flight is in 12 hours now because i fell asleep beside my friend and he let me because he knew i needed it he kept watch even though we dont have time we never do because he has to go now and all i can give him is a hug and my hoodie to keep safe until i can see him again and fight him in a stranger’s kitchen again and the sun is gone now and i go and i sit with my dad and my flight is in 10 hours and im trying
not to cry im trying to stare at the stickers because maybe if i look at all of it hard enough i’ll get to stay but i dont because thats not how it works and now my flight is in 4 hours because i fell asleep in my childhood loft bed and now i have to leave i have to pack up and go for the fifth time and it never never gets easier and i know i only have a few more trips left until someone takes my stickers down and paints over my ocean but for now my best friend’s stepmother comes with me and my dad to the airport because my best friend is in college two states away and my flight is in 3 hours and i cry i cry so much and she cries too because she loves me and i think it is such a beautiful blessed thing that i am so loved but oh it is so painful too because i spend more time in its absence than its presence and my flight is in 2 hours and i have to go and my dad is waving goodbye and i see it because i looked back because im stupid i always look back i never look forward i’m forever walking blind through my life because i’m looking back and i can tell my dad is crying and now i have to go through TSA sobbing and it’s awkward because they ask are you okay kid and im not but i cant tell them sorry its just that when i was fifteen somebody threw my glass heart onto the floor of my childhood house and bits of it shattered everywhere and fell into the cracks of the floorboards and behind the fridge and i’ll never ever get them out i cant tell them that so i nod yes im okay and i go and my flight is in 1 hour and i hope it fucking crashes and my flight is in the air and im so far away from all those shards on the kitchen floor now but they’re hurting me all the same and i think i look kind of insane sobbing in the middle seat but how can i miss so many people and so many rooms at once and not lose my mind a little bit? i was going to tell you a short witty little joke about the time i realized i was 21 and didnt know what the superbowl was but i think i slipped on a shard. i’m sorry. maybe next time i’ll get it right. maybe in another two years. maybe you’ll never see me again. maybe this is all the time we had.
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#got volume 1 of trigun maximum for like £9.50 and now im#trying to come to terms with the fact i’ll never get the rest bc theyre out of print#and so hard to find 🚶🏻♀️#like im half convinced the one i have is fake#although that seems like a lot of effort to go through for a tenner 🧍🏻♀️#but like. the website said it was in good condition but its looks almost brand new 😭😭#anyways its was less then £10 so i had to get it even if dont get the rest#bc by all accounts thats a pretty good deal 😭#personal#however whenever i start collecting a manga series its sometimes hard to not get the urge to complete it#like with op i thought i’d get the first few. then told myself i’d stop at 100 and now im waiting on volume 102 being delivered 🚶🏻♀️#i bought vol 1 of bleach and had to stop myself getting the boxsets 🧍🏻♀️
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i caved and bought the legacy collection out of curiosity
i bought it on steam by the way, no way am I going anywhere near the ea app
random thoughts as i go along:
game loaded up straight away with no issues (what a strange feeling)
got into pleasantview within 2 minutes (obvs I have no cc installed right now so its gonna be faster anyway)
a bit of a jumpscare to see the game again without reshade ngl
straight into the lothario household. don you look... different without all my defaults
screen resolution defaulted to the right size without me having to change anything by the way, which was nice
turned up all the graphics setting to max and going to visit the goth household as that always gives me lag, even vanilla
this experience is already making me realise I need to cut down my 12gb downloads folder, cos man this is so smooth and fast without all of that in my game
well everything is working perfectly straight out of the box. had no issues with multiple sims on the big goth lot
going to quit and load up again with my ui mods and defaults next (along with hugelunatic's ikea pack as cc)
legacy collection has an entirely different file path by the way, so won't mess with existing ultimate collection installs (i wouldn't have dared to do this otherwise)
okay all my defaults, ui mods and some others are now in (downloads folder is up to 3.64gb now) and everything is working fine still
ikea items as cc don't seem to be fully appearing in the catalog though? that might be a me problem but i dont know
adding in all my cas cc now, along with hood defaults and hood deco cc (downloads folder is up to 6.5gb now). i'm also adding in anything else I can think of like camera mods, user startup cheat etc etc
getting into pleasantview in less than 2 mins still
heading into cas for the first time now...
... and it loaded up within 10 seconds even with ALL of my cas cc? and this is the first time too so I would've expected major lag. normally cas takes about 60 seconds to load in my game
update on the ikea pack as cc... the build items are definitely there, but not the buy for some reason?
biting the bullet and adding in the remaining 6gb of my 12gb downloads folder
all of my cc is now in the game and loading times were about 30 seconds longer than before. still no issues
took darren dreamer to a community lot and there were no crashes/issues/lag. normally going to a community lot is very dangerous for me cos its where I get the most crashes or issues, its why all my community lots are incredibly small lot sizes
also I have the hood deco view set to extra large... normally I have to have it set to extra small just to play in a small household
i dont think I'm being delulu here to say things are running better
next up is adding in all of my mods, then after that I might dare putting in my mega populated uberhood save, and try reshade?
another ikea update: everything is showing up now. it was me being an idiot
so all of my mods are now also in (so my entire downloads folder now) and i haven't been able to trigger any crashes or pink soup yet through normal gameplay? even with extra large hood view from lots
reshade keeps crashing my game on startup... damn, what am I doing wrong
RESHADE IS NOW WORKING (ver 6.1.1)! thanks to this guide
I finally added in my uberhood save (which is packed with hood deco and and has 35 playable families).... and it's working! I also played with a household for a bit and everything was working fine
final update before I go to bed (as its gone midnight here lol)
i now have all of my mods, cc, saves, and reshade installed, and I've yet to have any pink soup or crashes (apart from the crashes when I was *incorrectly* trying to install reshade). honestly... i'm surprised. i dont want to speak too soon obviously, but things seem better. i was just playing in a household with extra large lot view on and that would usually IMMEDIATELY crash my game, but nothing happened. tomorrow i'll actually play for an extended period of time, so i'll be able to tell more for sure then.
i hope this has been helpful to at least a couple of people, and i'll leave with you a shot of my pleasantview newly loaded up in the legacy collection 😅

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just how big are the planets in homestuck?
this is a question that has been in the back of my mind for a while now and i thought i might as well try to figure it out.
first we're gonna need a good reference point.
fortunately andrew hussie made this part easy for me.
we know the stick on the floor in this panel is a meter stick with exactly 8.56cm snopped off to make it exactly one yard. as a canadian im more comfortable working in the metric system, but i'll take what i can get.
at its longest points, this stick is 211 pixels in length. 211 divided by 3 is 70.33333333…
let's round this down to the first decimal point to make things easier for myself.
ok so in the homestuck universe one foot is 70.3 pixels. at 417 pixels, this would make hussie in the same panel just shy of 6 feet (1.8m) tall.
with this unit of measurement we can start measuring other things.
john, at 222 pixels from the bottom of his shoes to the top of his hair, comes out at 3.2 feet (1m). quite short for a 13yo, but i digress.
safe assumption that john remains 3.2 feet no matter how far away you are. with john zoomed out to 87 pixels in height, a foot is now equivalent to 27.2 pixels, again rounded to the first decimal point. that would make the alchemiter next to him, at 278 pixels, 10.2 feet (3.1m) tall. the door, at 179 pixels, is 6.6 feet (2m) tall. the window, at 125 pixels, is 4.6 feet (1.4m) tall.
let's zoom out again.
john is a minuscule 27 pixels in this panel. the doors are a diminutive 51 pixels tall and the windows a whopping 36 pixels. alliteration aside, this would make a foot at this distance a mere 8 pixels. with this in mind, the entire house, at 703 pixels tall on the right-side wall (not including the railing), is 87.9 feet (26.8m) tall.
once again we zoom out.
the same wall in this panel is 117 pixels tall, making a foot from this distance a mere 1.3 pixels. the pillar it rests atop of, from the end of the driveway to the point where it meets the clouds, is 182 pixels or 140 feet (42.7m) tall.
one more zoom out.
the combined 227.9 feet (69¹.5m) of the house and pillar combined have been reduced to a mere 10 pixels here. with the length of a foot now immeasurably² small, let's just go ahead and make this our new point of reference. at 250 pixels, the diameter of LOWAS is the same as 25 of john's house plus pillar, or 5,697.5 feet (1,737m). this would make its circumference 17,899.2 feet (5,456m).
we only need to measure LOWAS its been demonstrated a few times that all the homestuck planets are roughly the same size.
at a diameter of less than a two kilometers, the homestuck planets would most likely be astronomically classified as asteroids. it would take about an hour and a half to walk all the way around a homestuck planet. not that you even could walk on it because assuming they had a density comparable to earth, homestuck planets would have an acceleration of gravity of 0.0000000000000001 m/s^2 (for reference earth's acceleration of gravity is on average 9.80665 m/s^2)
anyway that's how big the planets are in homestuck.
¹nice ²technically measurable i just dont feel like it
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Wicked Gelphie fans, i need you guys so badly to know how well Elphaba/Glinda are "good timeline"d "history doesnt repeat, it rhymes"-ified by Dorothy/Princess Ozma in Baum's original Oz book series. like. Dorothy/Ozma get everything; theyre the sweet, intimate friends-to-"??? are they a couple?"-ified political power-sapphic-duo that Gelphie would have wanted to be. like??
if you merge canons, fam... Wicked-Glinda must be struggling, seeing Dorothy/Ozma be everything she and Elphaba could have been.... omfg... the angst potential, the envy of watching a couple of sapphic childhood sweethearts get everything they were denied, fulfill Glinda and Elphie's dreams, and seemingly so easily too...
(also!! they even CAN look like a kid-Glinda and kid-Elphaba! there's canon to justify that kind of appearance paralleling!!)
faq below if you want more context
edit, psa: i did read these books from like.. the ages of 10 to like 14 or so, maybe as young as 8? idk, i dont remember. anyway. its been a decade since i picked them back up. and i didnt think this would gain as much traction as it has been after 100+ notes in less than 24 hours. uh. so. take my chronic memory loss-addled summarization with a grain of salt?? like? i just wrote this post so i didnt have to re-vent (agAIN) to my friends about how much i fucking love Dorothy/Ozma, period, much less in parallel to Gelphie. so. enjoy, carry on, and whatnot lmao
1️⃣: there's Oz books? plural???
yes, Baum wrote 14 books about Oz, actually. also, he wrote them under the appointment of "the royal historian of Oz" instead of "author", so there's other "official" Oz books by other "royal historians of Oz"
Baum wrote so much bc (he needed money, yes, but also:) kids would send him questions in fan-mail, and he would proceed to answer them via new novels. so he never planned to make more Oz books, he just (wasnt good with money and also) was routinely inspired by the kids who wrote to him and would write the stuff they wanted to learn about Oz and whatnot
2️⃣: does Dorothy go back to Oz? wasn't it all a dream for her??
yeah, Dorothy returns to Oz a lot in the books, she eventually even moves to live there permanently. bc, in the book series, it's a real place
only in the 1939 film was Oz ever a dream
3️⃣: how does Dorothy look like Glinda OR Elphaba?? what are you talking about?
okay so, "The Wizard of Oz" has an illustrator, W. W. Denslow. in the book, Dorothy is confirmed to be wearing a blue-white gingham dress (she changes outfits tho, she doesnt always wear the same dress all 14 books like she's some cartoon character); but im pretty sure her hair was all Denslow(? i could be remembering wrong. p sure im not tho??). this is what the 1939 movie based her appearance off of. so i can see why youd go "she doesnt look like Glinda or Elphaba"



BUT Denslow and Baum started feuding. so for the rest of the Oz books that Baum wrote, he had a different illustrator by the name of John R. Neil
and Neil decided to give Dorothy for every one of the books he illustrated (so, 13 of Baum's books to Denslow's 1 book of Baum's) a cute lil blonde bob, making her look like what i assume blonde-Glinda looked like as a child. i think she'd approve lol





so!! Dorothy very much looks like a trendy little Glinda, with her cute blonde bob, her fashionable drop-waist dress, and bows for most of the Baum series, actually!
(also, Neil had a preference for dressing Dorothy in this red and polka-dot number, but, again, she does wear other outfits)
(lmao also look at Tin-Man and Scarecrow with blonde-Dorothy, they look like her two gay dads encouraging her to just go be herself at school?? i love them)
(also, if you see "Eloise At The Plaza"-energy in this Dorothy design, im right there with you lol)
4️⃣: who is Ozma??
she's the Princess of Oz. she eventually appears in the second book of the series. she rules Oz after the Wizard
she's actually a really interesting transwoman allegory too. (spoilers for a book from the early 1900s?) she was born a little girl named Ozma, but has a spell put on her as a baby to be genderbent and was socially raised as a little boy under a different name, and she later realizes who she truly is: a girl. she finds the transformation scary, as she returns to her girl-form she always truly was, but she feels better and more herself now that she is Ozma again. i dont think L. Frank Baum intentionally wrote her to be a trans allegory, but you can very obviously see why our trans elders fucking LOVED Ozma back in the early 1900s
also, she has a similar "sir, you fucked up" relationship with the Wizard as Elphaba*. and, also like Elphaba, Ozma politically tries to make things in Oz better (just.. unlike Elphaba, Ozma has the power and support to do just that p much asap)
* (edit for contextual clarification on how the Wizard fucked up: the Wizard fucked up with Ozma because he is ultimately and p directly the reason why she was genderbent/hidden. he deposed of her family and sent her away. Baum decided later on to backtrack a little bit on this(?) because he wanted to bring back the Wizard and, in order for Baum to do that, has to try to not make him SO terribly horrible??? so like. Ozma does end up forgiving him and tolerates him amd he's nicer, later on, within the books. but i doubt any modern adaptation of the books would follow that, personally. even as a kid, i went "bullshit" and headcanoned that Ozma fucking hated the guy and, at best, MAYBE tolerated him for Dorothy, but overall did not like him for justifiable reasons! i think the direction society seems to have taken the Wizard is interesting, and i wouldnt be surprised if there was at least one future adaptation that made him The Bad Guy in a very Rumplestiltskin in the Once Upon A Time TV show kind of way. but like. in the books, they do END UP getting along. i just forever disagree with Baum on that lol i think the Wizard fucked up, and in book 2 of the series (the one where Ozma is, y'know, introduced), it is obvious the Wizard FUCKED UP. but yeah. also, Ozma does get her dad back. her mom was kind of never in the picture to begin with, specifically in a Ponyo's Mom kind of way, like, she made Oz and then left it for her husband and kid to rule, so. yeah. im getting off track. my point is the Wizard did a full-on coup on her family and then banished her and genderbent her so no one would recognize that she had claim to the throne he was sitting on!! he fucked up! so, like, i personally hc that Elphaba founded the "i hate the Wizard" club to which everyone slowly joined, like Fieyro and etc, and Ozma is their youngest member. the Wizard did both Elphie and Ozma so dirty, omfg)
it also should be mentioned, Ozma in NBC's "Emerald City" was casted as Black (her actress being Jordan Loughran). so, though Ozma does not have green skin (but also? neither did the Wicked Witch of the West in the books, she wasn't green there. that was a 1939 film decision to make her green. so! Ozma could be green!! why not!), but she does have Black features to theoretically remind Glinda of Cynthia Eviro's Elphaba when you consider that casting. or, if you prefer a Jewish!Elphaba casting, a'la Idina Menzel's Elphaba, i think Ozma's book design works well to interpretively parallel those features too. or both, if you like the sound of a Black-Jewish Elphaba and Ozma paralleling lol
(edit, because i thought i mentioned this but? no?? i didnt?? i must have misclicked or something to have deleted the paragraph. im so sorry, here you go:) also, when Ozma was a boy, she was basically enslaved to her jailor of a caretaker. which one could interpret as "oh, a Cinderella story!", sure. but, with a Black Ozma, it does read as an intergenerational grief-formed power-fantasy that is both empowering and poignant for Ozma to have ran away from her enslavement and gone on to become a princess afterwards. to any Black folks who may be going "is this going to trigger me?" about Ozma having been a child-slave, i remind you that Baum wrote this intentionally for children, so, no, the books do not sit in the trauma and horror of enslavement, but whether or not it would trigger you yourself is up to your discretion. i will say, Baum did NOT write the American Girls' Addy of his time (context: a children's book about a child-slave that does go into the horrors, some, though in a kid-friendly way) or Louis Sachar's Holes (i asssume i dont have explain Holes since its movie was such a hit), i remember it as even more kid-friendly than either of those also-children's books, so i would assume most people would be fine? but you are responsible for your own mental well-being, i urge you to confirm if it is fine for yourself however you need to do that. but, yes, you can use this backstory as further evidence for your Ozma being Black, of course! you can have Ozma be Black regardless, but if you want this as further evidence, go ahead! and also, it does parallel Ozma to Elphaba in the sense that Elphaba's family mistreats Elphaba! (i will, regardless of if you prefer a Jewish and/or Black Elphaba, add that doing so is also a nice "fuck you" to Baum in how, being a white man of the late 1800s and early 1900s, did end up throwing in racist and/or antisemitic caricatures here and there within his 14 books, unfortunately. i, an Indigenous American, remember as a child still immensely enjoying Oz despite Baum being racist towards Native Americans. if youre curious on the egregious level of it all and if the story could still be enjoyable, id say it's in the realm of Peter Pan, Willy Wonka, and Matilda of "wow. that is shitty. im going to pretend this thing i love is good instead via cognitive dissonance")
regardless, in John R Neil's illustrations, Ozma does have black hair, so that too coincides with modern understandings of Elphaba






(there is also her appearance in Disney's "Return to Oz", performed by Emma Ridley, where she is blonde. but, though i love that spooky movie, that's neither here nor there. as far as im aware, only in that movie has Ozma not had black hair)
anyway, she rules Oz; and by book 3, becomes really close friends with Dorothy. they're not a canon couple, not anymore than Gelphie is, but they are such close and affectionate friends that they are so easy to ship as childhood sweethearts (so, no, there is no moment of 🎶loathing🎶, but i find that sweetness makes them an angstier parallel for Glinda to watch over, personally lol)
like here's some illustrations from the books of them just being two "gal pals". no wonder our queer elders shipped them lmao and this isn't even all of their illustrations together, this is just the first spurts that google shot out at me lmao



also??? this is them with book-Glinda. not only do they look absolutely darling, also, yes, Dorothy becomes a princess, because Ozma said so. they co-rule Oz together. they are just too sweet, fam, i love these two little childhood sweethearts, i choose to see Dorothy's princess-ship as the same as two kids promising to marry one another when they grow up. this is so cute



and can you imagine Wicked-Glinda? looking down at these two, seeing what could have between herself and Elphaba had things turned out different??? im making myself sad
(also "Book of Glinda" is so wild. both in terms of "...Baum, how do you not see this as queer?" like with one example being like "Baum, you put that Glinda has 100s of single women at her beck and call in her palace, this is so easy to see as sapphic, sir"... and then, over here, we have John R Neil repeatedly reading "gave a platonic, innocent kiss" and going "okay, so, uh, making out? i dont do platonic kissing" lmao anYWAAAAYYYY, THAT'S NOT RELEVANT HERE)
🌟5️⃣ bonus:
so, you might have a few follow-up questions. like, what is "Elphaba" like in the books? what does she look like?
well, she's really only in the first book. she's one-note, evil, dies. she's not green-skinned, and she isn't given any sort of name. she is only called "the Wicked Witch of the West", that's it, she is not Elphaba
however, i will mention the Wicked Witch of the West, in the books, is a fashion disaster and i want to see her look used as evidence that "yes, goth-Elphaba and dark-academia-Elphaba are 10/10, but also?? kitschy grandma-core knitwear-Elphaba × her fashionably Barbie pink girlfriend". i'd love to see art of that. i'm just saying


also?? this isn't related to her at all but guess what
Scarecrow/Tin-Man was like THE ship for our queer elders. they are so emotionally intimate, they live together, it's great, look at these pictures of them being absolute bros (can you see why they were shipped so hard)


i bring this up, bc you could argue Fieyro/Boq if you merge canons to make your own narrative and whatnot. guess Fieryo and Boq kinda had their own mirrored 🎶loathing🎶 period under that framing lmao
or, if you hate Boq, youll probably love the Tin-Man's angsty "ship of Theseus"-like backstory as the once-Nick Chopper(: his human name, pre-tin-ification) that is in the books
so! enjoy that knowledge!! theyre super cute in the books, i love them. again, not a canon ship, but still beloved by our elder queers, just like Ozma and Dorothy
i hope it makes even more sense now why our queer elders used the phrase "Are you a friend of Dorothy?" as code to see if someone else was queer, not even taking into account the 1939 movie or Judy Garland's relationship with the queer community
anyway, albeit this is all the basics generalized, that should be everything
but yeah!! Ozma and Dorothy reminding Glinda of what could have been, of what she lost, being the sweeter "next generation" version of Gelphie?? tugs so hard at my heartstrings
but yeah, do whatever you want with Gelphie, Fieryo, and Part 2. im just saying. the angst potential of being envious and living vicariously through someone and seeing other people get the happy ending you were denied?? is right there lol
(edit: this awesome video by Kaz Rowe JUST came out if you want to hear more about the Oz book series, its queerness, its author, its GLARING PROBLEMS including but not limited to instances of racism, and so on and so forth. Kaz Rowe is a fantastic video-essayist, so i hope you watch the video and enjoy their hard-polished craftsmanship)
#wicked#gelphie#glinda#Elphaba#glinda x elphaba#wicked glinda#ariana grande glinda#glinda the good witch#glinda upland#elphaba thropp#wicked elphaba#cynthia eviro elphaba#the wicked witch of the west#wicked witch of the west#wicked witch#dorothy gale#the wizard of oz#wizard of oz#princess ozma#ozma
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Opinion on the US's Cogs damn obsession with corn?
don't know what you're talking about specifically but my understanding of US agricultural policy in general is that being a farmer in capitalism sucks and has since colonization and for a long time the US government tried to make it suck less with subsidies which sometimes work (because people get paid predictably regardless of demand and its less like gambling with crops) but sometimes go over really badly (because then too many people grow it and the price per bushel goes down and then government has too much corn) and then a couple times they got rid of all the subsides and related regulations and that REALLY didnt work (because then the price just crashed hard and with nothing to compensate them a bunch of farmers, many of whom were in debt for other farming-related reasons, couldnt get paid and actually had to foreclose their farms, which accelerated the long-standing trend of farms getting foreclosed on and then being bought out by bigger farms that then ended up running INSANE multi million dollar operations, sometimes even on farms in other states where the owners do not live, in communities they do not contribute to) and they had to backpedal on it and then eventually they just started on the current system where you simply pass a farm bill every 10-12 years instead of yearly or biyearly and that way you simply dont have to think about it, and then when it is election time you go stand by a cornfield for a while for tv. it does not fix the huge enormous farms buying out smaller farms problem or any of the complicated related problems but it DOES put it off for longer which is more important.
sometimes also you (USAID for instance) can give the too-much-corn you have from farm subsidies to a foreign country as a 'gift' and say youre just being a helpful little guy, but in the process of doing so undercut the local farmers in that country because they cant compete with free stuff but that's cool because then the foreign country can't really survive as well without US agricultural aid and you can manipulate them to do imperialism better AND you have more demand for the corn which might raise the price per bushel in the US. also sometimes the corn is fed to livestock en masse because the meat is worth more and sometimes its made into gas or high fructose corn syrup, and sometimes the price is so low per bushel that the insurance on the field is worth more than the actual corn.
but. i CANNOT stress enough that the most important thing about corn is that you can stand next to it on tv and if you cant do that, maybe you can stand next to a guy who is around it a lot and say you are helping him.
in my relatively uneducated opinion the most epic way to solve this complex multi-century interdisciplinary push and pull of supply and demand would be to just pay farmers a salary through the state since youre already paying out massive state subsidies for crops you dont need anyway and the farmers are performing a vital service and that way you can guarantee people a consistent salary AND control how much of each thing gets planted so you dont have a massive stockpile at all times AND you reward individual people instead of paying out large amounts of money to whatever massive operation sells the most corn by virtue of being big, but if you dont want to do that then the second best thing is to just pass another mediocre farm bill whos inflexible 10-ish year lifespan makes it impossible for it to respond well to changes in market demand and that way you can just put off making tough decisions and instead stand next to a guy and a cornfield on tv again. which as we have covered is the most important part of american agriculture
#you know?#(i took an agricultural history class in college. dont remember everything but i remember my overall impression was this)#asks#plont asks
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I have been obsessing over this perfect court!AU and have literally like one irl friend to talk about it with. So.
The thing about Riko is that he never ever ever could have been anything different. He has at least one but probably two personality disorders (narcisism and antisocial i'd argue), which are the result of the abuse he endured. From a young age he was only an object, a spare, or the embodiment of an idea.
Others are redeemable because they are people, but he never really was a person in his own right. So he got worse and worse and worse, and we all know what he did.
I wanted a story where he could have something different, for i feel there is no universe in which he ends in a different way: everything he has is a childish dream, and that would have failed at some point anyway. And with failure comes death. I think his brother would have killed him even without the whole clusterfuck of the last game, just because without Kengo the main line was now only one adult and the 'branch' one was 2, which is one too many. Between Riko and Testuji, killing Riko made the most sense because Testuji had no interest in power, he just liked his dolls; also he was already an expert at his job, while Riko would have to learn/train to fill that role. And obviously age is also a factor, Riko is young, Testuji is middle-aged: for ichirou, a young man, the second is less threatening.
I could go on for hours guys im not even joking
For him to have a different future, he is not even the only thing that needs to change. If he was a good person, he'd have been dead earlier. If he was an okay person too. Maybe as morally gray he'd have the same exact life with a little less enemies.
What needs to change with him is the people he has around, his safety net. He has zero people on his side in canon (And he shouldn't have them, mind, he's horrid. But still, out of every bad person in aftg he is the only one who no one loves), he only has followers and pawns. So for an AU to work, he would need to change in a way that would affect the people he surrounds himself with enough to once again reach the show down with Ichirou and "win" against Testuji.
To do that, i think he needs Neil on his side. Kevin is great dont get me wrong, but he doesnt get it the way neil does. Neil gets the mafia, its way of thinking, its deals and the way power moves. Neil know how to be vicious and how to read people and how to push just enough.
To have a 'good' relationship with neil something needs to go differently during the selling, so that his mom doesnt run away with him. But he'd also need to have a good relationship with kevin first. For him to have a different relationship woth kevin i dont think he'd necessarily need to be better morally, he'd just need to be a better manipulator. In canon he controls people with fear/violence/money, but the best way to control people is actually through love/favors. To train a dog, you better give it treats than beat it. I think this way they would end up with a better relationship but also, the better relationship would in turn make him a better person, and the two things would continue to feed each other.
Neil comes in now. He is 10, Riko and Kevin are 12. The thing with Neil (aside from all i've already said) is that Riko would quite literally own him at this point, the same way he then owns Jean. The main difference between the two situations i think would be 1) their personalities 2) their age. At 16 (Jean 14) Riko is already off the deep end. Waay too deep. But at 12? Different story.
For the first point, mostly i'd say that Neil grew up in an abusive household like jean did, but he knew his father as the butcher, as a mafioso, and he was taught how to use knives ecc as a kid. He knew the drill, he knew the life. Jean was completely uprooted, brought into a different country, told to play a game i dont think he knew anything about. Much more jarring. Neil already loved Exy, he wanted to play it all the time; the sport itself would be a good motivator for good behaviour. Jean was just angry angry angry (fair.) and alone in a different country. So. Not the same. I think Raven!Neil would be the one person on the team not afraid to tell Riko off, but also not afraid of his violence (much more restricted in this au guys), and riko is also not scared of Neil's violence (a bit more than in canon, he grew at castle evermore; he is nathaniel) so they find solace in each other. He'd know when to listen and when to mouth off [Riko saying "nathaniel" vs "neil" and things like that]
Second point is their age, because at 12 riko is more susceptible to change than he is at 16, so building a rapport with neil would prove more beneficial, for all i've said in point one.
Jean would be a harder case. Bringing him to heel is much more complicated, because riko doesnt have anything to leverage against him nor offer him, the guy has nothing to lose anymore and now is not enough of a person to desire anything (well. Anything obtainable. He'd like to be free for sure). I think again a lot of the work would be done by neil (and kevin too obv, but neil mostly, as his partner) because they are the same age, play the same role, are partners. Neil would be a centainty. And this better riko wouldnt be violent to destroy his spirit, he'd be "forgiving" (when useful) and bandage his wounds when the Master beats him, and be generally kind to a kid who is so starved for kindness he'd kill himself to at least get the touch of death. That + group mentality and i think jean would be on board too.
Andrew also factors in all of this, but i'll go on later this has gotten SO LONG and i wont even reread it gosh i hope it makes sense.
Basically this whole thing ends up in: take the insanity that is andreil as a couple but that somehow is the sanest couple out there but extend it to the perfect court 5.
#riko moriyama#aftg#neil josten#kevin day#jean moreau#andrew minyard#all for the game#tetsuji moriyama#ichirou moriyama#i hope no one misreads this post as a “riko is actually redeemable” on the piss on the poor website
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Hello, it's the new year and I haven't been...talking much for a long time.
As I've stated, I've had multiple health scares this year, and I -goddamn this is too formal, I dont like to talk about myself much, I'd rather keep things to myself, but I'm currently taking multiple meds for a formal diagnosis, right now I'm being treated for Bipolar. Turns out there was something up. I aint really afraid to talk about it, I mean lots of people get treated for many things and it's normal.
This was uh.....scary for me, I figured something was up and I mean I'm fine now but DAMN first 15 minutes of hearing that? Nasty. Lot of things that are super personal tied to just a lot of shit yada Yada I feel like shit for just being nonchalant about this but I don't know what else to do, I'm taking care of myself and trying to fix my life up.
But now that I'm getting to a point where I'm more stable, I'm starting to feel more ....me? Genuinely, it's gonna take me a long time to make myself get into a solid schedule, I dont think I'll ever have one, maybe the slight one i have now, but atleast I don't feel like I have 0 control over my life at this point.
Idk man I had some kind of control but I don't know...who am I kidding. I feel like a new person. I feel better, my body doesn't hurt as much.
I don't know if being a new person is a good or a bad thing for me but uh...idk idk idk maybe I kept reading through my scripts and realized something.
Anyways, now that I know when to take the meds so I can draw, I've been back to just? Drawing and having fun?

Really living by this its why I'm not online much, if I aint having fun what's the point.
BUT now I get to the uh...other shit.
So because of the meds stuff and all kinds of shit mostly......IM ABOUT TO LOSE INSURANCE...... and I've done a few things.
For starters. I'm setting up a patreon, I'm going to do it so that it would only charge when I make a post of 5-10 pages of the comic, I'm gonna get through my first half of chapter 4 before I ever even think if taking anything from ANYONE, so no monthly just for specificposts. Quite ffrankly, I do not like money, like in a way of it makes me nervous and I want people to get a bang out of their buck because I'd I don't make it good is it worth it????
tWO......I don't like advertising, I never did, I probably should of said I have them last few plushes during December (like everyone around me was saying to do and YET....there is less then 10😭) but I wanted people to be spending money on something worthwhile. Hell I mean, it's guilt, its massive guilt, there are people more in need and NOW MORE THAN EVER.....so to not feel like a thief, anyone who gets this critter here, I will donate a solid 30USD out of each purchase to a family in Gaza in need, of your choice of course. I need to pay for shipping but whatever else is left I will donate the rest. That should leave me around $40 on each plush and that's fine, I'm gonna save it for meds because when I go uninsured idk how long it's gonna be, maybe a bit maybe a while, I dont know yet but I wanna provide aid in some way. Like ceasefire don't mean shit until it's permanent, and I don't trust Israelis to hold true to any promise. So I want some of that money to atleast help SOMEONE. Because in the end I know I can get by but.
But my wife is the only person with a job.......😬😬😬😬😬
Besides all of that I'm sorry I haven't uploaded pages or drawings or anything, I wanna have a better relationship online, like I did when I was younger, when it was just fun and I had my own corner, maybe that'd nostalgia but I'm getting sick of social media, and maybe I don't wanna be walking on eggshells because of fandom whatever. So I will be trying to do more in the future, I hope yall have a good day.
And thank you again for all the patience with my slow ass 😭
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Birthday Cake



Synopsis - The day before your birthday, Yunjin pays you a visit
Pairing - Kim Chaewon x Reader
Tags - Angst (not that sad tbh), established relationship, told from Yunjins perspective, Chae is only mentioned. Inspired by the song Birthday Cake - Dylan Conrique. Possible errors
Word count - 2799

“Hey. Howve you been? I hope lifes treating you well, wherever you are now.”
“Youre turning 23 tomorrow god youre getting too old for this world grandma.” Yunjin couldnt help but chuckle to herself from the irony of it all, knowing you werent getting any older and you never would.
“As per birthday tradition we made you a cake! Well Chaewon baked it obviously, you know i cant bake for shit. Youre probably laughing at me right now arent you? You werent any better either.”
“Remember that time actual firefighters had to come and save us from the mess you created? When you tried flambéing for the first time to impress Chaewon with a fancy home cooked dinner? But then ended up impressing everyone by burning down your kitchen?
Oh and remember that time when you tried baking bread but got distracted and left the loaf in for too long? It was like a black crunchy concrete brick. And then your dumbass tried eating it”
Yunjin recalled, cackling at the memory. “Man that was the best 10 bucks of my life, wiping her tears from laughing too hard.
“Fun times those were”
“Hey I helped decorate it though! We all did! Its a nice heart shaped cake in your favorite colour with ribbons and swirls of frosting to line the edges. We even cut and put on some of your favorite fruits. Youll see it tomorrow when Chaewon comes to spend the day with you.
Speaking of your girlfriend, or ex girlfriend now? i guess im not quite sure since you know youre not here but then again you never really broke up either so like honestly im just gonna say girlfriend because saying ex girlfriend makes the situation even sadder.
“So like anyway we spent half the day going around to places you both spent time together at. Im talking date spots, food places, things you liked to do together. I think she wouldve rathered go alone but i didnt feel right letting her go out half in a daze.”
“We went to the park where you two first met. Sat on the ledge of the fountain she pulled you out of, in the exact spot you gave her your number to repay her back for saving you. She didnt say much during the day, just a few words of how the moment you had together went. I think she was reliving it in her head, i cant even blame her.
We then went to the bakery coffeeshop you had your first date at, Chaes favorite one in the city. She ordered her usual, a slice of cake and a milkshake, apparently you two would always share those when you went.
The waiter recognised her and immediately put the order in with a nod, Chae didnt even need to say anything. I got a milkshake too, it was pretty good i can see why you enjoy the place.
Chae ate half the cake, drank half the shake and then left it, said that she was saving it for you. I think part of her still thinks youre here. Like she knows youre not, but she doesn’t want to believe it.”
“Did you know her milkshake came with 2 straws? Maybe the waiter thought id be sharing it with Chae but like i also got my own one so maybe the waiter thought youd be coming too. SHE definitely did. She kept going on about how we couldnt go yet because you werent there yet. It took her half an hour after before she left the cafe.
Your half of the meal is probably in the bin now, either that or Chae took it home with her. I dont really know, i stepped out and waited in the car. It felt like i was interrupting something. Didnt feel like crying in public either, at least in the car less people would notice.”
Yunjin doesnt say much after that, letting her thoughts take over and enter rumination. Its not until she hears the cheerful chirp of a robin that she snaps out of her reverie, wiping away a stray tear that had began to fall. Clearing her throat she continues to recount her day.
“Ahem uhm we also went to some other places, your favorite ice cream store by the pier, that one ramen place we found on a drunk night out, the tiny photo booth store in the mall with all the goofy accessories. You get the point though, places we made memories at, places where we had fun together. Now we’ll never get to.”
“At the end Chae had me drop her off by this flower garden. Im not quite sure why she wanted to go, she didnt say. She also didnt want me to go with her either. All i know is that theres a big duck pond inside, maybe you would know why.
And then I came here.”
Reaching into the bag she brought with her, Yunjin pulled out a medium sized box. Not too big, not too small and placed it on the ground in front of some flowers that were starting to wilt, evident by the dry outer petals and leaves. The box was covered in blue and white lined wrapping paper, topped with a golden ribbon bow and a tagged envelope attached by string.
“Oh and i brought you a present. Youd probably try emphasise how much you dont need a gift and that just being with you was enough but how could i not? Its your birthday. You and Chae can open it up tomorrow, i wont reveal the surprise just yet.
I wrote you a card inside too, i know how much you appreciate each one you get. I stumbled upon your box of old cards youve kept. Sorry i didnt snoop too far i promise, i stumbled across it when looking for clothes to steal borrow while you were out oops uh now you know but i got curious and took a lil looksies. Found the one i wrote to you 3 years ago, actually made me cringe i dont know why you kept that. Will also not understand how you managed to keep one from when you were 12 though. Like i cant even remember where i leave things the day of i cant imagine being able to keep something for that long. Real dedication you know.”
Theres a rustling of leaves in the air as silence stretches on, a slight breeze blowing past making the atmosphere of the graveyard even more chilling than it normally is.
“You know its funny, she visits you every weekend , half the time probably just to sit in silence, but you already knew that. After all your always here its not like you can leave, no matter how much anyone wishes otherwise.”
Leaning back onto her arms with her hands flat on the ground, Yunjin looks up into the sky wistfully, watching the clouds slowly drift across and a few broken leaves fall down beside her. Its strange how the clouds kinda look like your face a little.
“She still tells you everything right? Just like before? Ive never seen someone who Chaewon opened up so easily to. You cracked through her angry hardass exterior so easily we didnt even know that was possible. Everyone else had such a tough time trying to connect with her at the start, she was always so standoffish and judgy, in a bitchy way you know?
Yet you appeared and proved otherwise. Made us feel like fools. Her friends of multiple years outdone by some girl she had met a few days prior, we were all jealous as hell.”
“But youre not just some girl. Youre yn ln. The yn ln who made Kim Chaewon the happiest girl she could ever be. The love of her life. The one she wanted to marry and spend the rest of her days growing old and wrinkly with.
Yeah she wanted to marry your dumb gay ass, picked out a ring and everything, i was there when she brought it.”
The plan was to have a beach day with the gang, you love the beach. Spend the day in the sun and surf then at night we would have a bonfire going, roast some marshmallows, eat some smores and then while youd be busy distracted Chae would get down on one knee and propose. There would be flowers on the floor in the shape of a heart, there’d be fireworks to celebrate and light up the sky. It was just like in those cliche tv shows you guys liked to binge together.
After you said yes, because we all know you would, you two would spend time together on the beach, watching the waves roll in and stares shine bright in the sky. Just the two of you in the best place possible, the company of each other.
Chae had it all perfectly planned out and it was going to be the best day ever for everyone, not including your wedding day of course, but who knew just 2 days before that, you…well….Yeah.”
Tears begin to fight their way out of Yunjins eyes, the memory of the news weakening her composure.
“Chae regrets it so much, that she didnt propse earlier because even if you still had to go, youd still be closer to fully being together. The word girlfriend is weak when compared to ones like fiancée or wife but we all agree you guys were each other’s wives, hell you guys already acted like a married couple with the way you treated each other, the only thing you were missing was the official government title. Theres no denying you guys were great together though, you fit together like pieces in a puzzle.”
“She never told you about any of that did she? I wouldnt be surprised, I dont think she has the heart to tell you.
Not after it got shattered to pieces when we got the call. It broke her you know? You. Broke her. Though you know that. In fact youre probably beating yourself up for it too, it wasnt your fault.”
Salty water was now flowing freely from Yunjins eyes, the streaks leaving a stinging after effect that started to poke and prod at her face. Temporarily she loses balance as she cleans up the running tears with her sleeve, careful to be weary of her makeup. There was a reason she wore waterproof mascara today.
“I still see Chaewon holding your engagement rings sometimes. She would fiddle with both of them for a little bit before putting on her one. It would slide into place so smoothly and shed wiggle her fingers and admire the ring as if it was the first time shed seen it.
It really does look natural on her, sits so well on her finger like it was meant to be. Yours is absolutely beautiful as well, i know youd love it. Maybe one day she’ll let you see it.”
Theres another moment of silence before Yunjin continues, hesitation evident in her voice.
“I know its probably selfish and cruel to ask of this, but could you do me a favor?”
“Could you loosen the hold you have over Chaewon? Im not asking you to make her forget, id never wish that for anyone and i definitely dont want to forget you either but please, set her free.”
“We both know shes never really going to, shes too attached, but encourage her to let go a little, tell her that shell be alright even if youre not here physically, let her know that no matter what happens you will always be by her side supporting her. All she ever does now is work, stay home or visit you. I know its not much different from what she did when you were still here but she doesnt even go out anymore. No matter how hard we try.
We did manage to get her to go on this date with this girl but not even 5 minutes in she ran out crying because all she could think about was you and how being on that date was like betraying and cheating on you. And we both know you hated cheaters.
It doesnt matter if Chae ever finds a new person or of she stays alone for the rest of her life clinging to your memory, i just need her to be happy. Maybe itll never be the same as it was before, but i cant keep going on seeing her like this.
She doesnt talk much and she doesnt even cry much anymore, i think shes run out of tears, just sits staring out into space. Its always silence with her now, she doesnt even get angry for fucks sake what happened to our angry cheetah? Shes lost all the fire she ever had in her, its still in there, it has to be. But, im not sure if we will ever see it again.”
Theres a much longer pause now before she speaks again, breaking the sullen silence with an equally solemn tone. Snorts and sniffles accompany her now hoarse voice, the crying between speaking taking its toll.
“Im sorry for not visiting earlier, i know its been almost 9 months since youve left, but to be honest i couldnt bring myself to come.”
“Its not the same anymore. The group cant do some the things we all used to do together. Anytime you get mentioned Jimin starts crying, Ryu gets mad and starts yelling before she also starts silently crying, she doesnt think we know, Yujin just gets up and leaves without saying anything and Chae just goes still and silent. Its like we cant even talk about you as a group anymore because everyone just goes quiet, trapped in the memories of the past or the moments of what could be.”
Running her hands through her hair, Yunjin lets out a frustrated gasp of air, clearly not a fan of how things have become. Her eyes closed tightly as if it would suppress the multitude of emotions she was feeling in the moment. If Yunjin had been standing shed be pacing back and forth right now.
Sigh “Ah its been more than an hour already” she says as she looks down at her phone. “Im really sorry that i have to cut this short, i wouldve been talking to you longer if i hadnt just sat in my car for so long, it really is inexcusable since i haven’t even visited before but im meeting my girlfriends parents for the first time today at dinner. Im quite nervous about it because what if theyre unwelcoming and dont like me? Or what if theyre not open to their daughter dating someone elses daughter? I really hope it goes well.
Oh my god i never told you about her. Im so sorry that i left it to this late to mention something as important as that. Youd be grilling me for details right now if you were here. Her names Kazuha Nakamura, came from Japan. Shes so calm, so so sweet and an absolute angel. She carries herself with so much grace like a princess of royalty but shes so unserious she could never actually be one if she tried. Also really funny without even trying, you two would’ve gotten along so well.”
“Zuhas also really understanding, helped me cope and get through you leaving, one of the main reasons I was able to keep going despite everything actually.”
“I really think it might work out. Hell we met while the wound was still wide open, but she stayed through that anyway and helped patch it up as much as she could.”
“I really wish you were here to meet her.”
“I miss you. We all do.”
Standing up, Yunjin gives her arms and legs a stretch, brushing off the dirt and debris of her pants. Looking down at the stone slab engraved with your name, a beam of light shining off and blinding the girl through her glasses. She gives you a half hearted smile filled with bittersweet longing, tears still shining in the corners of her eyes.
“Thanks for being our friend, and thanks for listening to me today. It made me feel a whole lot better just talking to you. You were always good at that, lighting up someones day by just being there. No wonder Chae loves you so much.”
“I promise to try visit you more often when i can. Maybe i’ll bring Zuha to meet you too. I know youd want that and im sure shed like to meet you too, even if just once.”
“I wish you were still here.”
“Happy birthday Yn.”

A/N - First angst oneshot, hope its alright. Feedback would be appreciated if there is any :]
#kim chaewon#kim chaewon x reader#chaewon x reader#le sserafim#le sserafim chaewon#le sserafim yunjin#yunjin x reader#huh yunjin#kpop imagines#le sserafim imagines
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GOOD MORNINGGGG(istg if you dont reply to those tiktoks imma-)
ANYWAY i woke up and had an idea for u cuz im so smart and imma give it to you
so lemme get theeee mcflurry and a big mac(full band headcannons) with a bf who just be maddddd clingy and they love it like all the time but thing is if someone does it a lot then they bound to need space and they thought if they told reader to stop he finna be sad
BUT sooner or mf they yell(not yell yell) for reader to stop for just a god damn minute and readers just like "ok🤷🏾" AND WALKS AWAY AND DOESNT HUG OR KISS THEM FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK(hell even two)💀💀💀💀like they will sit next to bro and he doesn't even lean on them😭🤚🏾
like he aint mad or nothin he just took it really literally😭
add anything you want like duhhh
BAND X CLINGY READER
teehee hii😈 you send me like 10 tiktoks in under a minute bro

BILL:
・He genuinely does love when your clingy
・Bro is clingy asf himself oml-
・Yet everybody needs alone time to themselves, and eventually he would just feel the need to be alone
・He really didn't want to hurt your feelings, he knew this was your way of showing your love, but he would eventually get overwhelmed.
・At first he'd try giving you small hints, like when he would say he wanted to go out for a walk. Yet everytime you wanted to come along and he didn't have the willpower to ask to go alone.
・He puts up with it for a little longer before he reaches a breaking point.
"M/N! Please just leave me alone for a second holy fuck-"
"Oh, okay."
・He'd feel relieved you weren't mad at him
・Yet after a day- hell maybe even a few hours- he's craving that touch again.
・Like sitting next to you on the couch just waiting for you to hold his hand or cuddle him VKYXWUHWVEE
・You took u alot of his time so now that you didn't hang out with him as much he felt surprisingly lonley.

TOM:
・Less patient than Bill.
・Babe he loves your touch, kissing you and holding you and snuggling you and-
・He won't admit it but he's actually quite clingy too.
・He really loves his alone time though, especially if its spent playing his guitar. He just likes to be alone to relax his mind
・Gives you a few subtle warnings, telling you he "has to clear his mind" and "needs to relax"
・Yet you would still cling to his shoulders like a koala. He loved you soso much and didn't want to hurt your feelings but he felt almost suffocated.
・Telling you he's going somewhere only for you to say "Ah, where are you going? Can I come too?"
"Can I go anywhere without you following me?!"
・lol ok
・You shrugged and walked away from him, he wanted to tell out your name and call you back but he also wanted time to himself
・Feels anxious when you don't hug or kiss him like you used to, he's afraid you'll break up with him or something.

GEORG:
・He'd get overwhemles pretty quickly
・No no, don't get him wrong, he absolutely loves hugging you. But sometimes he would rather hangout and talk instead of snuggling for hours.
・So if you ask to go out with him somewhere he doesn't care at all at first, actually encouraging you to come along with him.
・But, like Tom, he loves to be alone.
・It's just comforting for him to be in a quiet area with nobody else.
・Bro gives no warnings, just flat out says "Can you not touch me right now..?"
"My bad."
・He's happy you understand him and don't just yell at him. He's happy you respect his boundaries
・He finds himself missing your touch, how you would kiss him all over his cheeks and lips or how you would play with his hair when yo would cuddle.
・HE THINKS YOUR MAD AT HIMMMMMMMM
・He's kinda scared to ask you to start giving him attention again
・You seem fine so...shouldnt he feel fine too?
(he doesn't)

GUSTAV:
・KJHBECJJLEFCBLUIEHRCLKUWEBDCLJHWEDCMKWEDCBMJDCMJWEDBM
・He absolutely loves your affection, doesn't care if he's doing something he will stop and hold you if that's what you want.
・He just feels so safe and happy in your armssss
・Sometimes he just needs a little break, like maybe a few hours or a day to himself.
・He always feels bad about this though, he loves you more than anything and doesn't wanna push you away.
・He'd give so many hints because he doesn't wanna hurt your feelings omfg
・Eventually just tells you flat out, even though his heart is pounding.
"I just need to be alone, M/N!" "That's fine."
・He doesn't know whether to be confused or relieved, he's a mix of both.
・He misses your affection so bad wtf...
・Just wants to pick you up and cuddle while watching a movie, but he's waiting for you to make a move but you want to respect him and-
・its very confusing.
#tokio hotel x reader#tokio hotel x male reader#tokio hotel x you#tokio hotel#bill kaulitz#bill kaulitz x male reader#bill kaulitz x reader#bill kaulitz x non binary reader#bill kaulitz x you#tom kaulitz#tom kaulitz x male reader#tom kaulitz x reader#tom kaulitz x y/n#tom kaulitz x you#georg listing#georg listing x male reader#georg listing x non binary reader#georg listing x reader#gustav schäfer#gustav schäfer x male reader#gustav schäfer x non binary reader#gustav schäfer x reader#gustav schafer x reader#x male y/n#x reader#x male reader
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Dorm leaders with a Razor!MC
a/n: totally lost the pookie who asked for this but if by some miracle yk its you, pls dont beat me up for taking so long </3 /j
also if tumblr did smth weird with the bullet points again, point ur guns at the app
its one week before my exams so im using my adrealine for smth!!
You are generally good-natured person who considers your wolf pack your family and becomes enraged if they are hurt by other parties. You love your wolf family but dislike the fact that you aren't fully like them. You considered the few humans you do encounter to be your friends and are willing to protect them from danger if it means sacrificing your and your pack's dinner for the night. You are a quick thinker. You are also honest and forthright due to your limited exposure to human life. You are not used to speaking and only speak in short phrases and words, finding it troublesome, but you continue nonetheless.
Riddle
my mans stopping you like this to take a look at your uniform

pookie, youre a lil messy rn -he said this in anger, I'm just giving you the nicer version
its ok, he helped you clean up a lil after!!
u absolutely trying not to mess up the collar and tie up bcs its so uncomfortable:😢😔
it always goes back to the messy version as soon as hes out of sight or its half the day already
he wont find out (i lied he absolutely did)
he can always count on u to tell him the truth should your friends ever do smth bad
"broke. chair." while pointing at ace and deuece
they have tears in their eyes as riddle approach them
honestly some of ur behaviour makes him go⁉️
fr thought u were a beastman or smth
then found out youre just a human whos lived with wolves their whole life
FUCKEKEKE REMEMBER THAT TIME IN HIS OVERBLOT WHEN HE WAS TALKING ABT PARENTS
u being an orphan as he goes on with his speech: /JOKE
ace beats his ass up for u its ok
him trying to figure out how they didnt try to eat u🤔
he didnt try to stop u but that wont mean he wont go😅😅
ALSO eat ur veggies pls
hes chasing u around heartslabyul trying to make u eat a wee bit of carrots
Leona
"veggies:( bad:(" "so real"
^ur real time convo
whenever youre given food with veggies, u pass it off to leona
leona then pass it to ruggie who then muched it off
he absolutely told u to give ruggie any veggies btw (free food for the man‼️)
ruggie is forever happy to receive free food
he actually thought u were a beastman too because of your scent
"r u a jack kinnie?" he would ask (he didnt ask it like that)
turns out you just got raised by them
idk savanaclaw might be an ok? place for u? considering most of them r beastman there
like its not even surprising to see u practicing with them every morning anymore
ruggie dragged both u and leona by the collar to practice btw
"im all the way in ramshackle" leona surprise adopted u to savanaclaw, dont resist /J
u surprisingly get along well with him‼️‼️
leona acting like he doesnt care abt the youngsters👴🙄 (hes failing)
he totally didnt take a nap with you in his usual spots, no who did that?? pft not him
no he did NOT save u from accidentally getting hurt by your friend's troubles btw no
also, he did not mind that you do not talk much
the less words the better for him!! he encourages this (he got beat up later by the people who thinks otherwise)
Azul
youre so simple, azul actually had a great time
"pls sign this contract to save ur friends" "ok:)"
well youre homeless now (not rlly u have a home in savanaclaw)
yk those super villains laughing evilly everytime their plans r going so well?? thats azul
he didnt even need to put many efforts in trying to trick u, u just go thumbs up at him
he does not feel bad btw
he does not care if youre a beastman or not. a business opportunity is all you'll ever be to him
maybe a friend too but you'll need to unlock friendship level 10 for that
can wolves swim underwater, im sayign yes for plot reasons
anyways u came back from trying to get the painting(?) picture (?) like a wet dog
im saying nonsense rn i think i need sleep its almost 1am
he threw his head back 90° to laugh dramatically at how u reminded him of a wet dog
this is a joke, do not come for me
honestly he had to drag u away from the lounge once bcs u tried catching the fishes in the aquarium
"MF LEAVE MY FISHES TF ALONE IF U WANT TO LIVE" is what he wouldve said if hes not a professional businessman
he is a professional guys do not worry💯
honestly, he is pretty ? that you had trouble speaking
after finding out its bcs youve been isolated from the human things, he kind of goes🤔
the business in his head is controlling him before he can stop them😖🫣
would u like a potion from him to help u with that problem<33
honestly head empty rn
Kalim
rhey all thought you were a beastman and he is not an exception
is def surprised bcs ur ass howled one time at a full moon
he witnessed that, he had the front row seat as witness
he lets u do ur thing its ok
even asked u if its family tradition HELP /J
"oh man u have such fluffy hair"
he said before trying to touch it and realising its literally tangled all over
him and jamil whos right next to him

were u raised in a barn??
kalim assumed theres no hairbrush in ramshackle
u dont have to worry bro, kalim is more than happy to stock u up with some hairbrush
"oh its nothing much dont worry😊🙏‼️" the literal gold handles on the hairbrush:
u dont have to worry abt not speaking much, he speaks enough for the both of u
he spoke such strange things u dont understand him sometimes
u just nod along and gave him thumbs up
its like sun and moon but the moon is confused /j
if youre sleeping outside, he will join u btw
he brought his pillows and blanket out to have a small sleepover with u
jamil had a mini heart attack when he went to wake kalim up in the morning to see hes missing from his bed
Vil
vil when be sees u

yk how yall lived in pomefiore for a bit after the idia thing??
yeah he polished u up so much bro
u came into the dorm looking like someone abandoned u so youe only option was to live in the jungle with the help of ur jungle friends and have survived through the way of the mammals since u were an infant
and u came out looking like a brand new person
u came out of the dorm looking like u got new skin that its literally shining under light, ur hair softer and no longer tangled and no more eyebags and u smell like flowers
vil wiping his forehead after a job well done😊🙏
also he was pretty shocked when he found out u were pretty isolated from the human norms or whatever
he did try his best to break you bad habits, like literally running in mud
he also helped u with like speaking problems?
he got u a whole dictionary in case u dont know the word bro
also fix ur uniform for ueach time u try to loosen it up because its too suffocating for u
if u try to loosen it up one more time, he'll add the veggies in ur plate
he absolutely does makes u eat ur veggies
he'll tie u down a chair and make u eat them even
/j he wouldnt. he have rook to help him with that
Idia
him after he fixed ur dorm with the greatest and newest updated quality just for u to sleep outside

he gets it, youve been raised this way
but he just fixed it for u bro😢😢cant u at least sleep in there
grim sleeps in diff rooms every day bcs of the upgrade and u did this?? /j
oh well at least the outside kind of looks better now too he guess....
u dont even use the tv, u dont know how it works
"people in there real?" "? no ?"
he beats u in every video games ever because u literally could not keep up with technology
hes slaying everyone and youre wondering how to make ur character walk the way u wanted them to
u accidentally drowned somehow in the video game
he feels a tad bit bad for u
he cant bond much with u because like
hes quiet, youre quiet
hes a modern dude, u dont even know whats a phone
he likes video games, u prolly like hunting for food
if you two r in a room together, the only people who r talking r literally the wind
"whoosh whoosh whoosh🌬" whoosh whoosh🌪
Malleus
he spoke enough for the both of u (its abt gargoyles)
he actually spoke so much confusing words for u
u looked at him like 😃🫨 (ur head is spinning and u r dying)
u can always ask him if u dont understand tho
he will explain in another paragraph but its ok, at least u understand now
barely actually
ur brain hurts and its fried from talking to him since he use big words
he did try to use simpler words for u!!
oh u two can kind of bond i think
youre both not familiar with technology so it will work well
u know those faces grandparents make when looking through new technologies
like the eyes squinting and eyebrows furrowed look with thag confused look
yeah thats the both of u
u both try to figure it out together (it did not work out)
yall asked lilia for help
peepaw is into the trends, he can help the both of u dont worry!!
he saw how messy you could be sometimes and went damn
he'll fix u up with magic its ok
show me funny things, magic man
anyways its a habit of his to fix anything in ur appearance whenever u have ur nighty walks
like u have this dirt on ur white uniform? say no more.
theres a damned branch in ur hair (dont ask how u got that) and its tangled in ur hair?? he got u pookie
part of ur clothes r literally ripped off because god's knows what youve been doing in your free time??? u dont even need to ask bbg
#also i think razor and silver can get along quite well#the adoptive sons#twst wonderland#twst#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland x reader#riddle rosehearts#leona kingscholar#azul ashengrotto#kalim al asim#vil schoenheit#idia shroud#malleus draconia#how do i usually tag#in my boomer era i forgot how to post#is this what i usually tag???#say yes pls
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chugs a pint of beer and slings the can against his forehead (tonk)

Constantinos Brakus HCs 🐂
The Basics:
obviously his mental health is in the gutter.
on his own he's just sort of a nuisance, spitting venom and trying to keep to himself. save for the times he decides to swipe something from somebody.
nothing special in the eyes of anyone. just plain dog food.
his priorities are arguably much simpler than most of the warring students' at bullworth. the main one being Food and the other just being going thru the motions of the day.
but aint nobody at that School normal, even if they aint in any of the cliques acting out gang wars.
Expanded Lores:
he thinks nobody really has his back. and for the most part, he's right. but there is one exception to this.
that being his Auntie: the nasty piece of work known as Edna.
having an iron stomach, he's probably the only kid that doesnt get sick off her cooking, after all he was subjected to it all his life.
it still doesnt taste great even if he does help himself to seconds.
but she doesnt mind lending a waxy ear to his plights. at all.
oftentimes he's asked her to feed some of his bullies especially foul things. homemade cottage cheese and the like.
anyway aside from her slop his diet consists mostly of red bull (hah), corn chips, and that canned spray cheese.
he can and will pound 3 energy drinks back to back to get through the day. or night. or whatever he wants to zone out of.
his sleep schedule is absolutely fucked up.
for one he has like 3 different bullies' homework to do so he doesnt get his teeth kicked in. for another the quiet of the night is far less grating on the mind than the daily struggle.
but when you're up late the days tend to blur together. he is horribly timeblind. never knows what day it is.
due dates breeze by him. as such he doesnt always get people's work done on time. the cycle of abuse continues.
he also loses track of other things. such as his own hygiene. tragically. but he makes an effort nonetheless.
genetics have blessed him with both Coarse body hair and semi Potent body odor. but he still tries to keep it under wraps.
he really doesnt need anyone calling him a monkey on top of everything else.
bullworth as a province doesnt care about the mentally fucked.
he can arguably be Many things, the most obvious being depressed, but the one thing he is for sure is Undiagnosed.
its not that his parents dont care about him. he's very well loved at home.
but his father is part of the coast guard and typically not around, while his mother has a rather unhealthy attachment to wine. so they dont give him as much attention as he may need.
speaking of his mother. oh boy.
you know what they say about military wives. they get lonely.
she's been having an affair with none other than ms peters, the music teacher, since constantinos was around 10 years old.
they had met at a flea market; his mom likes to make trash collage art from seashells and corks and whatnot, and ms peters likes to support local artists.
damn hippies am i right?
he's less ashamed of them being dykes and more put off by his mom just being a cheat.
music class has especially gotten uncomfortable for him.
speaking of, he primarily plays the clarinet, but he was also slotted to be the poor sod playing for the school's nutcracker showing.
which as we know jimmy had to fill in for, on account of him either sleeping through it or outright deciding not to humiliate himself further onstage.
moving on this boy absolutely hates everyone. himself included.
being in the mascot though? its great. because hes Not himself.
he'd be happier if he got his own fursuit. but he was banned from the local convention center on account of him stealing a few hundred dollars worth of things.
so the mascot costume, and all its drawbacks, will have to do.
even if hes more of a jackass donkeyboy lololol.
yeah his kelptomania has caused him a lot of pain
closed many doors for him. hes pissed off most of the cliques with his stickyfingered ways.
most of his stolen loot gets shoved under his bed, but hes not adverse to chucking things in a donation bin somewhere either.
whoops that got a bit long. anyway. inbox is still open.
[hc masterpost link]
#bully canis canem edit#bully scholarship edition#bully cce#canis canem edit#constantinos brakus#mine
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munchausen by proxy
another attempt to get my ao3 out there via tumblr ❤️ warning for kind of dark weecest as dean is 14 (which implies sam would be 10), implied child abuse, underage incest, grooming, and similar topics!!! don’t like, dont read!!! ☝️ also heads up for second person pov, this is written so ur dean. also i high key don’t like the ending to this, its kinda ass..
summary: supernatural au where the monsters and demons and hunters are shared delusions of dean and sam, a by product of john telling stories and feeding them hallucinogens and similar meds since they were able to breathe.
(read it on ao3 !) https://archiveofourown.org/works/61008211/chapters/156560167
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“A child weaned on poison considers harm a comfort.” - Gillian Flynn, Sharp Objects
Daddy always told you to look out for Sammy, that there was something in the closet, under the bed, something always out to get you. You knew what Daddy meant, saw it from the corner of your eye, you swore you did! You wouldn’t be a good big brother if you couldn’t take care of Sammy, Daddy said so.
You turned 14 five days ago. Daddy gave you a special treat. You weren’t actually sure what it was but it was sweet so it didn’t matter to you. It made you feel all funny, tingly and floaty. A real special treat , Daddy said as he handed a piece to you and the other piece to Sammy. You knew better than to question Daddy. Last time you did that, you had to be 5. That was the first and last time you tried that. Besides, Daddy was a lot nicer when you didn’t question him.
Your birthday night, you felt like you were dreaming throughout the whole night. Which was odd, cause you felt tired, like you had been up all night. You could’ve sworn you had been sleeping since 6 pm that night. But you knew better than to ask Daddy about your weird dreams, how tired you felt.
You wondered if your dreams meant anything. You remember hearing Daddy’s voice in your dream, muttering something you couldn’t make out through the haziness of dreams. Sammy was right next to you, you could feel his presence, even in your dreams. It was so real though. You swore you could feel Sammy’s little hands on your body, feel your pajamas being pulled away from your body, could feel dream Daddy’s eyes on you and dream Sammy. (Daddy would be proud of that fact, you were sure.) You couldn’t really remember what happened after that. You woke up with a wetness in your pajama pants. You didn’t wanna wake up Daddy in the next room over or Sammy next to you, who oddly enough had a similar wetness in his pajamas.
But you could deal with it on your own, you were a big boy. You could dress yourself and Sammy, get ready for school before Daddy even notices anything. As long as you bury it in the laundry basket, you knew Daddy wouldn’t ask.
You were good at doing what Daddy asked, swallowed down whatever he put in front of you without a word. You saw what he sprinkled atop your spaghetti (you couldn’t help but notice it showing up on Sammy’s first before you connected the dots to your own dinner) and you knew it wasn’t parmesan, Daddy didn’t bother buying that. But you never questioned Daddy, he made sure of that.
At school, you were learning about abuse. You were less than interested in learning about the signs of abuse. You were friends with smart guys, you knew they could handle themselves. (You wondered if you could handle yourself, really.) You couldn’t help but think about Daddy as you listened to the lady at the front go on and on about abuse and the signs and blah blah blah. You felt bad but you couldn’t help your mind. It just seemed.. similar.
When Daddy asked what you learned today, you couldn’t help but watch him sprinkle the white powder over dinner and overthink his question. (Did he know? You wondered if he took a peek inside your thoughts.) Nothing. Nothing fun, anyways. I could barely pay attention. He took your answer with a hum and placed the plate in front of you. You couldn’t help but notice the lack of Sammy.
Daddy? Is Sammy with a friend or something?He’d dismiss you with a wave, muttering on about how it was your night tonight, don’t worry about Sammy, focus on Daddy tonight. You gave into his requests with a hum of your own.
As you finished your plate, you noticed the haziness fogging your head again. You couldn’t make out Daddy’s words. (You were glad Sammy wasn’t here tonight. You nonetheless wondered where he was. He didn’t talk to many people in school. You couldn’t find your voice right now, not with Daddy pulling down your jeans and a warmth cupping your head.)
#weecest#wincest#the winchester family#the winchesters#the winchester brothers#johndean#deanjohn#samdean#deansam#supernatural#spn#sam winchester#dean winchester#john winchester
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good evening daet fandom. anyway i was going through my old scribbles and i found these that i did about a year ago.. where i thought about what a sequel to dust could look like: an unstable dust having to fight his other halves for control a lot more than in the first game. i think i posted a little bit about it a long time ago but i figured i'd post these too.
i just keep coming back to this little blue guy. its been over 10 years now i can't escape. for more ramblings go below the cut
i like the idea of jin when he shows up is a bit more.. like. not as willing to get things done and is a bit more of a pushover. like he was kind and willing to help but the extreme he was pushed to in order to avenge his parents is more of an exception and not the rule OR if you're not a fan of that jin interpretation i could see he over-corrects in his interactions with other people in fear of slipping into the person he became when he lost his village. plus if he gets angry he fears thats when cass can wrestle control from him and dust
cass is aggressive. he's angry. he lost the one person he probably cares about in this world and he plans to make it everyone's problem. fortunately ahrah has a mind of his own and whenever cass tries to use him in a way that's not self-defense he can just. stop in midair and cass can't do shit.
that doesn't mean dust never shows up, he just has less of a wrestle on the two souls than he had before because of the whole dying thing. it gets exhausting managing his emotions and two entirely unique souls yknow? him and jin do kind of team up to keep cassius from yknow. killing people but jin also doesn't have dust or cass's strength so in life-threatening situations he's kind of useless. and i think dust has a lot of strength and is resilient but he can only handle so much and he's one of three sharing a body. its probably mentally and physically exhausting.
anyway sorry if you read this far its almost 2 am and i dont really feel like proofreading too much. if u like this maybe i'll draw more and if you wanna send some asks about it you can
#dust an elysian tail#doodles#also i just think it would be so fucking. tragic for ginger to in a roundabout way reunite with her brother#but also seeing him meaning they might be risking dust#and it brings up an interesting question of if there's two souls what does that make dust#does he have his own 'soul' or is he just like. purely magic#ALSO i mentioned this back when i originally posted about this idea but i changed cass to purple and jin to orange#mostly bc i thought they were better than the green/red typical colors#and it looked better on dust's blue#though dust with red eyes KINDA fucks#but i think purple works better (and its my fav color)
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