#anyways it started as a random way to cope with all of the noise my family made and now look at where we are 🔥 (i am more depressed now) | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

standfucker · 1 year ago

Text

Engravings

inspired by the following comment on my last SH fic:

Couldn't stop thinking about it, which eventually led to this.

Characters: Sanji

Reader: GN, they/them

Word Count: 6.2k

CW: Hurt/Comfort, SH, SH scars, auditory hallucinations, PTSD, mental institution-related trauma. No shipping, ace-friendly

Summary: It’s Sanji. You’re immediately, wholeheartedly certain. It’s Sanji, and he knows.

AO3 Link

"I’m listening to everything / please, tell me everything"

Nothing’s happened.

The sea is calm, the sun is shining, and the breeze is strong. All in all, a great day for sailing.

Nothing’s happened…

No recent squabbles among the crew, no surprises from sea beasts, no battles with pirates or Marines.

There’s no reason to feel the way you do. No trigger or logic to it. But you feel it anyway.

It’s like there’s an invisible filter over everything. Nothing looks different. Things sound different, though. The sounds of the waves and wind, the snapping of sailcloth and rope, the din of the crew’s voices. All of it wavers, like someone has their hand on a universal volume dial, yanking it back and forth at random. Sometimes the sounds are piercingly loud, like they’re right next to your ears, making you resist the urge to cover them. Sometimes the sounds blend into the background of everything else in a low, dull hum–so distorted that you have to focus to parse what’s being said to you.

The sound issue is your second tip-off that you’re having that kind of day. The first is the sense that the Sunny feels too small. And, crushingly, overwhelmingly, it feels like your fault. Irrational, but you can’t shake it. Really, it’s stupid: On the outside, it just looks like you’re hanging out next to your crewmates, making idle conversation. Inwardly, there’s such a deep feeling of guilt for just being there that you’re ready to throw yourself overboard.

You try to cope. You really do. You make an effort, mentally talking yourself through it.

I am allowed to take up space. I am allowed to exist.

You want to cry. You want to get down on your knees and beg for forgiveness. It doesn’t make sense, and there’s no cause you can identify. You feel like you’re going to throw up.

No one notices. How could they? Your mask is calm smiles and practiced eye contact, formed with easy jokes and interest in what the others say. Your mask is years in the making, thick with each layer you’ve added to seal in the cracks. It’s heavy and ugly, but it keeps you safe.

I am allowed to exist.

There’s no danger. You can’t explain why your fight-or-flight response is going off. There’s something wrong with you, and no one can see it because the problem is deep in the wiring. You can’t even see it. But you can feel it, and it feels so god-awful you don’t know how to endure it.

You feel yourself shaking from head to toe, so much so that it’s hard to keep your balance. But when you look down, your body is completely still. The noise around you blends together and buzzes like static, harsh on your ears. Then it gets louder.

I am allowed to exist.

You want to crawl in a hole and hide.

I am…

You excuse yourself–casually, collectedly–and head for the ship’s interior. You know what you’re going to do before you even start moving, like the decision’s already been made for you. A certainty that settles in your system, something to hold onto. The background noise grows even louder.

You stumble into the bathroom. As soon as you shut the door, all sound cuts out.

You can’t hear anything. Not even the sea, nor the creaking wood of the ship. The room shifts, draws away from you until you have tunnel vision. Your vision warps, then focuses on the cabinet above the sink until you can see nothing else. Just like before.

It’s been a few weeks since the last time.

The background noise slowly picks up, but it’s distant, like you’re hearing it coming from a different ship. You reach for the cabinet.

What are you doing?

You open the cabinet. It’s organized so each crewmate’s stuff is clustered together, with the common items at the bottom. Your gaze passes over your deodorant, your nail clippers, your toothbrush, and settles on your straight razor.

Aren’t you too old for this?

You take your razor. From the common items, you take a bottle of alcohol. You fold up some tissue paper.

What would the crew think?

It’s hard to ignore the thoughts. But like any bully, they usually go away if you don’t give them energy. Usually.

The razor’s weight in your hand is comforting. It shouldn’t be, but it is. You unfold it, wipe down the blade with some alcohol. Then you lift up your sleeve and slide it over your shoulder.

This stretch of sea has been balmy. With the pleasant weather, you’ve worn a t-shirt, the short sleeves going just less than halfway down your arm. Underneath them, high up on your shoulder, are the scars. Faint and healed, a few shades lighter than your skin tone. Noticeable in the light, but that’s why you don’t participate in the group baths.

The background noise gets louder again. You think you hear shouting, faintly, but that’s normal for the crew. It barely registers over your heartbeat.

Your heart is beating harder than before, dull thumps in your chest that seem to echo. Anticipating, ready.

Everything is going to be okay.

Finally. Finally. A hurt you can make sense of. Small, controlled. Yours.

There’s supposed to be a rush, you’ve heard. You don’t feel one. But there is a difference. The tunnel vision stops, the filter lifts. The world snaps back into place, the sound goes back to normal.

That’s when you really notice the shouting, no longer muffled by brain static. Something’s off. You focus. It doesn’t sound argumentative, like Zoro and Sanji. Nor is it playful, like Luffy or Franky’s might be. It’s startled and panicky, immediately grabbing your attention and making your adrenaline surge.

A second later, you hear an echoing BOOM, followed by an ear-splitting crunching of wood. It’s a sound you recognize, one you’ve heard before–a cannonball tearing into the ship.

You’re under attack.

For just a moment, you stare at your equipment, caught off guard. Then you pull yourself together–take your feelings and compartmentalize them for later dealing with–and tear out of the bathroom, dropping the tissue in the process. Your pistols are in their case, in the sleeping quarters. You need to get to them before you can join the fight…

The enemy pirates are strong–for a New World crew. Unfortunately for them, they’re completely outclassed by Luffy alone, much less the combined strength of the Straw Hats. Still, the numbers favor the enemy, and the battle is tiring enough to be distracting. Enough so that you forgot about what you were doing before it started. It’s only an hour into helping Franky patch up the ship, when you feel your shirt sleeve catch on your scabs, that you remember.

Then you realize you left your equipment out in the bathroom.

The razor. The alcohol. The bloody tissue paper.

Panic floods your system. You drop your tools and jump up as if electrocuted, all but flying to the bathroom. Has anyone used it since the fight?

Please no, please please please be wrong.

You kick the door open. It bangs harshly against the wall.

The equipment is gone. Your stomach sinks.

No no no no no.

You open the cabinet. Everything’s been returned to its place. Your straight razor has been folded and put away, as has the alcohol. The used tissue paper is gone. Not in the trash, either. Whoever it was must have discarded it in the toilet.

No no no no no!

Who?

Who was it? You run through the possibilities in your head. Zoro? No, he wouldn’t clean up after someone else’s mess. Neither would Nami. At least, not for free. And what about the rest of the crew?

Whoever it was, would they even know what they saw? Surely they’d just think you cut yourself shaving. That was the only explanation, right? Even if the patterns on the tissue paper were distinct, the stains shaped into blurry, beaded lines–unless they had done it before, there’s no way they’d know. Right?

This time, when you shiver, it’s for real, not just a figment of your imagination. What would happen if you were found out? At best you’d be kicked out of the crew. At worst…

I’ll get locked up again.

You feel ill. Dizzy and nauseated with the prospect. You try not to spiral, try to get a grip before panic can take hold. The best you can do is to close the door behind you, sit on the floor, and take deep breaths.

You’re not sure how long you’re there–minutes, hours–but you don’t get up until someone knocks on the door.

“You almost done?” Usopp calls from the other side.

Swallowing hard, you find your voice. “Yeah. Just a sec.”

Usopp doesn’t so much as give you a second glance when you pass him. It’s not him.

You’re hypervigilant the rest of the day, scrutinizing every action, every word from your crewmates. Nothing seems different, but that only makes you more paranoid.

Nami offers you a tangerine. The simple action sets off a cascade of racing thoughts: Is she trying to make you feel better? Because she knows? Did she tell anyone? Did she tell Chopper? Luffy?

Every interaction is like that–an innocuous action that makes you flip out internally.

Franky gives you a gift: A cute little wind-up frog toy, made from scrap metal. He says it's to thank you for helping with repairs. You scan his face, but he’s only grinning proudly. Not Franky, either.

Zoro invites you to drink with him. Brook plays a song you like. Robin hands you a book she’s just finished, saying it might suit your tastes. Nothing unusual, but enough to make you second guess everything. Each time, you cling to your mask, holding it so tightly to your face that you can barely breathe.

The next day, Sanji cooks your favorite meal for dinner. That wouldn’t be too weird, except you know for a fact that your favorite involves pricy ingredients that he prefers to save. You know this because he mentioned it, years ago, when he was teaching you how to make the dish.

You and Sanji had joined the Straw Hats at the same time. Two weeks before Luffy had shown up, you had tried and failed to dine-and-dash from Baratie. Zeff forced you to work to pay it off, plus an extra week to “teach you a lesson.” That was when you got to know Sanji. Unlike the rest of the chefs, he wasn’t mad at you for what you did. He even taught you some of the basics of cooking. As the only soft presence on the floating restaurant, you grew attached, and that feeling of reliance never really left since then. You were drawn to his air of confidence and self-assuredness, but mostly to the fact that he never hid who he was, even when who he was could be straight-up idiotic at times. But you still respected that about him.

You always liked to hang out around the cook, helping him prepare meals with what you learned at Baratie. You both fought well together, having each others’ backs in battle despite your different fighting styles. It was safe to say that he was your favorite crewmate, and though you weren’t sure what he thought of you, you viewed him as your closest friend.

So you really, really don’t want it to be Sanji.

You appraise his expression, his movement, his actions. It all seems normal, on the surface. And yet, it feels off somehow, but you can’t tell if that’s just the paranoia speaking.

“How is it?” Sanji inquires.

You stare for a second. It’s not a question he usually asks–he knows it’s your favorite and he knows you think it’s amazing. Maybe it’s just your imagination, but the smile doesn’t seem to reach his eyes.

“Delicious, as always,” you say. Your own smile lights up your face, the way you’ve carefully practiced. “What’s the occasion?”

He pauses, rubs the back of his neck. “No reason, really. I just thought that it’s been a while since we’ve had it.”

That evening, you’re alone at the port side of the ship, leaning against the railing and looking out at the night sea. Sometimes it helps with your racing thoughts. This time, it does nothing. Nothing keeps you from fixating on the situation. You feel like you’re hanging by a thread, like at any moment you’ll get kicked off the crew, and then your whole world will unravel. And it’s entirely your fault.

The questions won’t stop repeating themselves: Who was it? Did they know?

Behind you, someone clears their throat. You whirl around a bit too quickly and steady yourself with a hand on the railing. Sanji’s standing there with his hands in his pockets. Something about his posture sets alarm bells off in your head. He’s too stiff, trying too hard to appear composed.

“Hey, Y/n,” Sanji says gently, “can I talk to you about something?”

It’s Sanji.

You’re immediately, wholeheartedly certain. It’s Sanji, and he knows.

You gape at him for a moment, then collect yourself. The mask comes back on.

“Actually, I’m pretty tired. Gonna turn in for the night. Tomorrow, okay?” you dismiss, and go to walk past him.

“Wait a second, Y/n,” he reaches to grab your wrist, but you yank it away before he can.

“Don’t!” you snap, stepping back, then quickly correct yourself. “I mean–don’t surprise me like that! We’ll talk tomorrow. I really should sleep...”

Sanji frowns, hand slowly lowering, and you make a hasty retreat.

The rest of the week is torture. You’re constantly avoiding Sanji wherever possible. He doesn’t strike up conversation when the others are around, which only makes you more certain that he knows. You ensure that you’re never alone with him, and if he does approach you by himself, you make yourself scarce. It becomes harder and harder to hide that you’re avoiding him. The crew takes notice–it’s not difficult considering you and Sanji are normally close.

Zoro’s the first to say something.

“Oi, Y/n. Did you have a fight with the cook or something?” he asks bluntly.

“No, we didn’t,” you reply.

Zoro’s eyes narrow slightly. “Well, you’re both acting weird.”

Some of the others are looking your way, now. Anxiety sours your stomach. You hold your mask steady as he continues.

“You’ve been kind of flighty lately. And he’s oddly subdued,” Zoro says, “I can’t believe I’m saying this, since he’s finally quiet for once, but it’s annoying. Would you just talk to him?”

“Uh…yeah, sure thing.”

Obviously, you don’t talk to Sanji. You keep evading him at every turn, only growing more distressed with each passing day. You know you can’t dodge the issue forever, but the moment you stop is the moment you’ll get kicked off the crew or worse, and that thought makes you want to die.

But the Sunny is only so large, and eventually, Sanji manages to corner you one night at the bow of the ship. You have your back to the figurehead, throat dry as you face him. Brook is up in the crow’s nest, keeping watch. Everyone else is asleep. It’s just you two, and you know you’ve run out of luck.

“We need to talk, Y/n,” Sanji says firmly.

Your throat goes dry. “Now?”

“Right now. No more running,” he says, taking a few steps closer. “I need to ask you something, and I need you to answer honestly.”

There’s no getting out of it anymore. “...Alright.” you say. Your heart pounds harder, palms growing damp.

Sanji takes a long drag off his cigarette, then stubs it out–that’s when your adrenaline really spikes, when you know you’re in for it. He looks you in the eye.

“Should you have access to firearms?”

The question hits you like a brick, stunning you into wide-eyed silence. You open your mouth, then close it, unable to respond for a second.

“...What are you talking about?” you try.

“Given how you’ve been avoiding me,” he says coolly, “I think you know exactly what I’m talking about.”

“I’m–I’m not following.”

“Don’t play dumb with me, Y/n!” he snaps, and you cringe. “Of everything you’re hiding, this is the one thing I’m going to find out. I’m not asking. You’re going to tell me or I’m going to tell Chopper. So answer me, right now: Are you safe around guns?”

You can’t take another step back, but you instinctively try anyway, your heel scraping the wood of the ship. But there’s nothing you can do. The mask crumbles, years and years of desperate crafting turning to dust in an instant.

“God, Sanji,” you respond, “what am I supposed to say to that?”

“The truth,” he says.

“And if you didn’t like my answer, what would you do? Take them away from me?”

“Yes.” His tone is unyielding, his eyes hard.

Yours start to sting at the corners. “And what after that? You’ll have me–” you bite your tongue to keep the tears from forming, “–you’ll have me kicked off the crew?”

“I never said that,” he says stiffly, “you don’t get it–”

“You don’t get it!” you bite back, voice rising. You lower it before continuing, “you don’t know anything.”

“I know you’re cutting.”

You flinch. The words sting. It’s not a pleasant sting this time. You turn your head, unable to look him in the eye.

“It’s just…” Sanji says, and there’s a touch of hurt in his voice, “after everything we’ve been through, I thought you trusted me.”

“I do,” you say automatically.

“You have a funny way of showing it.”

That stings even deeper. You shake your head. “I do, Sanji, but this is different.”

“Why?”

“It’s none of your business!” you bite. Bile rises in your throat at your venom; you hate being callous.

“My friend’s hurting themselves,” Sanji replies thinly, “that makes it my business.”

“That isn’t how this works!” you argue. “You don’t get to know everything about me just because you don’t like this!”

“Don’t I?”

“No!”

“You don’t feel safe with me.”

That one’s like a punch to the gut. You can’t tell what’s worse, the words themselves or the way he’s looking at you. That one hurts the most, because it’s true.

“...No,” you say after a moment, then steel yourself. “You’re right. I don’t. I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Sanji, please.”

“Don’t you plead now,” Sanji says, his tone hardening. “Don’t you put me in this position, Y/n.”

“I don’t have a choice, Sanji. I can’t. I just can’t.”

“Why?”

“Sanji!”

“Why?!”

“Because last time I trusted someone with this, I lost everything!” you blurt out. “I was institutionalized, okay?! Locked up! Is that what you wanted to know? Are you satisfied now?”

Your words echo in the silence that follows. He stares, jaw dropped slightly. You’re shaking, for real this time, and the words pour from you like a dam unblocked.

“You don’t know how humiliating it is, Sanji, to have the strings on all your clothes cut off, to be given only felt tip pens to write with, to not have doors, to have a scheduled bed time. To have all your choices taken away.” Your vision blurs as you continue. “I couldn’t do anything. It was like a prison. The other patients didn’t give a shit. The staff definitely didn’t give a shit. And all the while, they drained me of all my savings, until I didn’t have a single berri to my name. Then they kicked me to the curb. The one who reported me didn’t want to be associated with a crazy person. Neither did the rest of my friends. I was homeless. I had no one and nothing! That’s why I fled my home island, and that’s why I tried to dine and dash at Baratie.”

Sanji looks taken aback. He blinks quickly, then stares down at the deck. “What would you have me do, then?”

“This is supposed to be private!” You cover your face, fighting back tears. “You need–you need to keep your mouth shut and mind your business! I don't want anyone’s ‘support.’ You were never supposed to know.” You take a shaky breath and lower your hands. “If you really care, you’ll keep it to yourself, you’ll forget what you saw, and if you tell anyone…I won’t stick around to make the same mistake twice.”

Despite what you say, you already know it’s too late. There’s no going back, and now that he knows, it’s only a matter of time until you’re left behind. You bite your tongue to keep from crying at the thought, but you have to bite harder this time. The tears keep threatening to spill anyway, until you’re tasting iron.

Sanji is quiet. He pulls out his cigarettes and lights one, not speaking until after he takes a drag. “…Do you regret joining the crew?”

“Joining the Straw Hats was the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” you say honestly. “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.”

“But you aren’t happy, are you?”

“Multiply something by zero and you get zero, right?” You look away, guilt eating at you. Experience tells you that no one wants to hear this. “I’m not trying to sound dramatic. I just… I don’t work right.”

“I don’t think you’re being dramatic.”

For some reason, that, more than anything else, breaks you. The first tears slip past your defense. You say nothing, lower lip trembling.

Sanji takes another slow drag of his cig and exhales away from your direction. “I don’t know how I missed it.”

“I do,” you say. “At the hospital, they…” the words die in your throat as the memories surge forward. “They…they…” You can’t finish, but tears begin streaming down your cheeks. You shake your head. “Let’s just say, after that, I learned not to ever give anything away. Never again.”

“They did something to you.”

You barely nod. Already you feel yourself slipping into a flashback, feel the nurses holding you down and the needle jabbing into your flesh.

“I’m sorry,” Sanji says, taking a step toward you, and then another, until he can reach out and gently touch your forearm. The touch brings you back, grounding you so that you’re back in the present. But the gentle action, and Sanji’s soft expression, only makes the tears flow faster, makes your nose run. You shrug.

“It must have been scary.”

Slowly, you nod again.

“Will you answer my question, Y/n? Please?” Sanji asks. “Please, I need to know you’re safe around guns. Will you at least tell me that much?”

You swallow the lump in your throat and wipe your face. When you answer, you look him in the eye so he knows you’re telling the truth. “Yeah. I’m… Yeah.”

Sanji sighs, his shoulders sagging with relief. “Thank goodness. Okay. Can I ask you something else?” At your nod, he goes on. “How long have you been feeling like this? Before the hospital, I mean.”

“...Since I was young,” you sniff. “I’ve been ‘coping’ on and off for years.”

Sanji sticks his hands in his pockets. “Okay. Can I see?”

“What?” The question catches you so off-guard that you stop crying. “I’m–I’m sorry?”

“You’re not going to show Chopper, right?” Sanji says. “So–”

“You’re not gonna tell him?” you cut him off, surprised.

“I haven't decided yet,” he admits. “I don’t want to go against your wishes, Y/n. But I don’t know the extent of the damage. Just… Just, let me see?”

“No.” You’re shocked at his audacity. What’s he thinking? Of course you can’t do that.

“I won’t judge. I swear, I just want to know you’re okay,” Sanji says.

“You can say that, but…” you rub your arm. “Be real. You’ll never look at me the same way again.”

“It won’t change how I think of you.”

“It will!” you shout, then lower your voice. “It will, forever. There’s no going back once that line is crossed and you see me for what I really am.”

He frowns. “Which is?”

“A freak!”

Neither of you say anything for a moment. Then you shake your head again. “I’m sorry, Sanji. But a guy like you��strong, handsome, confident–you wouldn’t understand.”

Sanji gets a weird look on his face, one you’ve never seen in all the years you’ve sailed with him. He looks to the side, then down, then up. His drags on his cigarette become long and harsh, finishing it in three breaths. He lights another, making a face. Then he nods to himself, like he’s decided something.

“Okay,” Sanji says. “There’s something I want you to see.”

You frown. When Sanji puts his hands on the hem of his pants, you frown deeper. He pauses.

“Um. Just trust me, okay? I promise I’m not doing anything weird–just wait a sec.”

He slides down his pants, and you have no idea what’s going through his head until his pale upper thighs are exposed. Then, finally, you understand, and you cover your mouth in shock.

Both of his upper thighs are covered in a myriad of scars. There must be over a hundred, clustered just above where shorts would hide them. Most of them are big, inches long and criss-crossed with each other. A few are keloid scars, thick and raised above the skin.

Your stare could burn a hole through his flesh. Slowly, you look up at him. Sanji has a faint blush on his face, looking sheepish.

“Guys like me can be freaks too,” he says simply.

You’re in complete disbelief. You keep looking back from the scars to his face. It’s too much to process–where would you even begin? Sanji, of everyone on the crew–Sanji’s like you? Brave, unwavering, gallant Sanji? Of everyone? When you don’t respond, he speaks again.

“See, Y/n? You’re not alone.”

Tears sting the corners of your eyes again. You find your voice. “Yours are old.”

“Yeah. I got lucky. Had someone’s support.” Sanji smiles slightly, in a way that he only does when thinking of…

“Zeff?”

“Yeah. He eventually found out.” Sanji laughs nervously. “At first he freaked out. Thought I was using kitchen knives. After he calmed down, he told me…he told me he wouldn’t abandon me over that, because what kind of parent would that make him?” His expression wavers like he’s trying not to cry.

You, on the other hand, start crying again the moment you hear the word “abandoned.” You realize that’s precisely how you felt back then.

Sanji grabs your shoulders so you look up at him. “You’re not getting kicked off of the crew.”

“...I’m not?” you ask, voice small and pathetic.

“No. I promise.” Sanji squeezes your shoulders reassuringly. “No one else needs to know. But, Y/n, I’m not going to leave you to deal with this alone. So, will you show me?”

“...You won’t tell anyone?”

“I won’t. I swear on my honor. This stays between us.” He lowers his arms.

You bite your lip, sniffing. You shut your eyes, mustering up your courage, and nod. Sanji waits patiently as you breathe slowly to steady yourself. You hesitate before peeling back your sleeve, exposing your upper arm.

He’s quiet as he inspects the damage. Unlike his old scars, yours have yet to finish healing, still in the scabbing stage. A ladder of thin, dark red lines decorate your upper arm and shoulder. You look between your cuts and his scars. Yours aren’t as deep as what Sanji had done, which you feel weirdly ashamed about.

Sanji’s hand comes up, hovering over your cuts like he’s going to touch them, but then he rests it on your forearm instead. Despite the clear evidence that he won’t judge you, you’re still self-conscious, so you break the silence.

“The scabs catch on my sleeves,” you say awkwardly.

Sanji nods. “I had to bandage my thigh so it wouldn’t bleed through while I was working. It always felt so…”

“Stupid,” you both say. Then you both smile at the unexpected camaraderie.

“What’s really stupid is how long I went thinking I was the only one,” you say, “and all this time, you…” You gesture vaguely.

“Can you do something for me?” Sanji asks. “Whatever you’re using–I’m not going to take anything from you. But in exchange, I want you to talk to me. We can talk in the galley, when it’s just us two.”

“I don’t know how to talk about it.”

How could you, after what had been done to you? After everyone you used to trust turned their backs? Knowing that Sanji understood you couldn’t fix the mental scars left behind by others. You could try to rationalize it, but just thinking about discussing the past made your throat dry up.

“If I told you about mine first, would it make you more comfortable?” Sanji offers.

You balk. “You–you don’t have to do that.”

“I don’t mind, if it means helping you.” Sanji says earnestly. “You can tell me anything. I won’t judge. How could I? We’re the same.”

Something broken inside you changes right then. Deep engravings fill with gold like broken pottery, sealing some of the cracks in your soul. Unmasked and exposed, Sanji sees into you, and he doesn’t waver or turn. He smiles, gently and softly and lovingly. Your eyes fill with fresh tears.

Sanji holds out his pinky finger. “Freaks?”

You smile from ear to ear, even as the tears start flowing again, and lock pinkies with him. “Freaks.”

So caught up in the moment are the two of you that neither one notices when Zoro appears until it’s too late.

He’s further down the deck, but standing right under one of the ship’s lights, so you can see him smile. “Hey, you guys are–” he starts, then notices Sanji’s pants. His smile instantly turns to a look of indignation, then rage. “What the hell?!”

Sanji scrambles to pull up his pants as Zoro charges.

“What the hell are you doing to Y/n, you creep?!” Zoro yells.

You hurriedly pull down your sleeve and move in front of Sanji, holding your arms up. “Wait a sec, Zoro!”

“I-It’s not what it looks like!” Sanji cries.

Zoro screeches to a halt right in front of you, but then stretches over your shoulder to snarl at Sanji. “You better have a good explanation for this, shitty cook!”

You grab Zoro’s arms to hold him back. Not that you could ever hope to overpower him, but you know he’s too brotherly toward you to push you out of the way. “Zoro!”

“What?” Zoro turns his focus on you, “what did he do? I’ll kick his ass for you, Y/n.”

“No, that’s–”

Sanji interjects, “I didn’t–”

“We were…”

Zoro relaxes somewhat, now frowning and looking at both of you weirdly. “What exactly were you guys doing?”

Really, being in the middle of the night, it’s not a good look. You and Sanji are both caught off guard. Fumbling hard, you both speak at once.

“I was looking at a fungal infection!” you say.

“They were removing a tick!” Sanji says at the same time.

Both of you glance at each other.

“Tick,” you correct.

“Fungal,” Sanji says.

Zoro blinks. “A fungal tick?”

You both just nod.

Zoro stares between you two, then relaxes. “Oh... Okay. Good of you to not wake Chopper.” He nods and turns, leaving the two of you to it.

So flooded with relief are you that it’s staggering. You mentally thank the stars that Zoro is a simple and straightforward type of guy.

You and Sanji watch Zoro walk away. Once he’s out of earshot, you both look at each other.

Then you both burst out laughing.

“Oh my god,” you breathe, clutching your chest.

Sanji wipes away a tear. “That was close, huh?”

The laughter dies down into giggles before you calm yourselves, grinning at each other. Then you’re both throwing your arms around the other in a tight embrace, squeezing like you’ve never been hugged before in your lives. You bury your face in Sanji’s chest, he rests his head on yours. Your fingers dig into the other’s clothing, soaking in the warmth and the comfort that you could only get from someone who truly understood. You stay like that for a few minutes, quiet, close, and held.

“Are you sure?” you whisper after a minute. “That you want to deal with this? With me? What if I never get better?”

“Nothing’s set in stone but the poneglyphs,” Sanji replies, running a hand over your head so you look up at him. “Our future hasn’t been determined.”

“Our future?”

“You and me and the rest of the crew. There’s still time to grow, and to change.” He holds the back of your head tenderly.

“When does that time run out?” you ask, uncertain.

“It doesn’t.” Sanji smiles down at you. “As long as we’re alive, there’s another chance. That opportunity is always there.”

You smile back, then press your face into his chest again. Sanji squeezes you tighter.

“Tomorrow,” you mumble into his shirt. “Let’s talk tomorrow. I’m tired.”

“I bet.”

“I never want to hide from you again.”

You feel Sanji kiss the top of your head. “And I never want to make you cry again.”

“I want to tell you everything.”

“I’ll listen.”

You both stay like that for a while longer, each second spent there healing something within yourselves.

It will take weeks to figure out how to talk about your troubles. When you’re up for it, you talk in the galley as Sanji cooks, you helping him out as usual with prep and cleanup. It’s even longer before Sanji learns everything. In the interim, you become the only Straw Hat to learn of Sanji’s past before he ever gets a wedding invite.

Like worn muscles rebuilding, like bone regrowing stronger, the scars you’ve revealed to each other, both physical and mental, strengthen your bond more than anything else ever could.

"let it out, let me in, take a hold of my hand / there's nothing like another soul that's been cut up the same" -Handwritten, The Gaslight Anthem

#one piece x reader #sanji x reader #reader insert #one piece imagines #zen writes

170 notes · View notes

sailing-ever-west · 1 year ago

Text

had a nonverbal episode yesterday and naturally am coping with autistic blorbos so it got me thinking about nonverbal Luffy and how that would affect the plot, especially with a character who is typically, well, yelling all the time.

like canon Luffy can't really keep his mouth shut and this causes many problems but I fully believe that he would be able to wreak just as much havoc if not more without ever talking.

him using sign language is super cool for a starting place, but

1. I'm honestly not sure who would've taught it to him because he didn't have a consistent education or guardian so what he knows is probably somewhat incomplete/rudimentary. Garp would've made a solid attempt I think but he probably would've tried to do it in like a strict lesson format and Luffy's brain would just ADHD straight outta there, but I think he still learned the basics.

2. Signing wouldn't always work to communicate because not everyone knows it so he would still often have to find other ways to get across what he's saying. The crew would learn sign and just get used to his various other ways of communicating but people all over the world when they're traveling can't be counted on to know stuff.

Random ideas I have

keeping a little flag with a jolly roger on it in his pocket and just pointing to it to tell people he's a pirate

just not bothering to try to communicate with people who have oficially pissed him off. sorry loser your privileges have been revoked I'm just gonna punch you now

marines getting really annoyed at first because they think he's staying silent to snub them and then realizing he just can't talk but by the time they figure that out he's already down to fight them anyway

stretching his arms into shapes of things to get an idea across

quickly drawing illustrations (not terribly helpful because he's awful at it, but he continues to do it anyway)

Zoro/someone else on the crew explaining things to a new person and Luffy just nodding proudly like yep that's my crewmate they get it :))

still makes Noises. nonverbal =/= quiet and boy does Luffy prove that

He used to sign "food" at Sanji but eventually he just Shows Up in the kitchen or approaches him with big eyes and Sanji knows what he wants

there's a rumor going around that he communicates with his crew telepathically because people cannot figure out HOW the ideas are getting across

asks people to join his crew by just showing them the little flag and motioning to follow him. once you come with him there's no going back he's like ok you're my best friend forever and within like 24 hours you're like well I guess I'm on a pirate crew

doesn't say gum gum when he does a move he just starts screaming. it's like far more terrifying and villains have no idea what's happening until they're being punched in the face by a nonverbal teenager in flip flops

basically take how abrupt and confusing Luffy already is to everyone else in the world and then imagine he doesn't announce anything before doing it

Thinking of doing some little fics or mini comics of major scenes in this AU idk

#one piece #monkey d luffy #autistic monkey d luffy #one piece headcanons #autism #actually autistic #nonverbal #sign language #luffy headcanons

80 notes · View notes

innocent-cat · 2 years ago

Note

I love your writing. I have more Percy ideas if you want. You can add as many Vox Machina characters to this as you want but I mainly want Percy. Him and acolyte background reader (they just need to have been a part of some temple, can be whatever class you want) are in that shy, flirty, mutual pining stage. While out at a tavern with everyone someone hits on reader rather brazenly and they just go "I'm sorry, but my faith demands I remain a celibate and solitary life." Meaning no sex or dating. After the guy goes away dejected and everyone is like why didn't you tell us that reader just goes "oh no I can do whatever, but people tend to leave me alone quicker if they think I've taken a vow of chastity." I know it's really specific but the idea of Percy's thought process is adorable.

I love your requests!! thank you.

Percival x Reader

Warnings - Alcohol, Sexual implications

"Moths to a flickering light", Percy x Reader

.·:*¨༺༻¨*:·..·:*¨༺༻¨*:·..·:*¨༺༻

After a long, tiring attempt of an adventure and capturing a bounty, Vox Machina decided they wanted to blow it all on a larger tavern tab.

Obviously, who could say no to a tradition so engraved to your ragtag crew that it's expected we do so? So, the whole group went without argue.

You guys should definitely figure out a new way to cope.

Upon entering the only bar left in Emon the group wasn't banned from, the group sat down at a table by a window. 7 seats. You sit on the windowsill built by the table, and Percy lean beside you.

"A round of drinks for the large group of weirdos in the corner, hun."

The wife of the bar owner told her husband, monotone surprisingly cold for someone who looks so bright. Lost the color over the years of a loveless busy marriage hmm?

Well. That sucked. You pitied them, but you couldn't do much. But, you could drink it away and pretend you never saw it.

Pushing off the wall, you decide you actually do want a drink. You walk through the bar, your footsteps light, but every noise drowned out by another within the loud clammy bar.

'Sorry. Excuse me. Oh, I'm so sorry!' You repeated these words as you pushed through people, hoping they'd understand they didn't really need to be standing in the middle of the bar. Chairs please.

"Hey, you mind if I get a beer?" You slid over the charge for the drink, quickly grabbing the frothed drink made for you. Taking a sip, you sigh.

you make a 180, and start walking back to the table you found your favorite scruffy pockpick, Vex'ahlia.

"Hey, what'cha doin without the group?"

"Whatever the hell I want, darling! We have funding that'll last us till the world falls!" She laughs, smiling, leaning, revealing a pile of drink cups on the table already.

"Alllrighhhtt.. you do that, Vex." You scoot pass the girl, likely to pickpocket 7 people by the end of the night.

"Still no drinking for you, Percival? You'd think you'd warm up to the drinking by now, truly." You took a large swig of your drink, sighing after swallowing.

"No, None for me. None of you can think straight, or at all for that matter, when drunk. You'll thank me one day."

'Tight-ass.' You whispered to him, giggling softly.

He looks at you from the corner of his eye, eyebrow raised. He shuts his eyes and he lets a smile peak.

"You know, one day you will get on my last nerve."

"Nah. Definitely gonna be Scanlan who makes you lose it. Speaking of Scanlan, where is he? Is he already balls deep in some random girl?"

"Uegh, likely. Don't get me started on him." Percy brings his hands to his face, fixing his glasses and pushing them farther on his nose ridge.

You let out a laugh, "I personally think he's funnier drunk, but I also think anyone can be funnier drunk, so take it with a grain of salt."

"..I think he's just.. odd." Percy retorted, expressing dislike for the poor habits of the bard.

"Maybe just a little. We all are anyway. Keyleth is an exception though. I wont make fun of her. She's normal."

Percy gave you a weird face before picking up the conversation you lead.

"We are all weird. Some of us less weird."

"You and Pike are definitely the most normal. Pike is our little morality compass, and you're just too polite for your own good. Sometimes you know when to be a dick, though."

Percy laughed.

You finish off your drink, and grab one of the group's table. They can't say no, you live off everyone collectively anyway.

"Ever been romanced, Percy?" You sip off the foamy drink, looking up to him as you did so.

"What? Oh. No, I guess I never had a chance to seek nor fall for sappy relations yet."

"I guess." You groaned out, growing bored of conversing with an garrulous man.

You take another drink out of your mug, and set it to the table, with a Grog, Pike, and Vax all collectively trying to come up with a reason to why it would be a good idea for Grog to take a bite out of one of the mugs.

'Ouuhhhkayyyy i'll ignore them, Percys' got it.'

When you turn around, you're met with a women directly behind you, practically literally breathing down your neck.

"Oh- do I know you?" You lean your body backwards, shifting your weight to the table behind you, your arms stretched to reach the table.

Her hand pushes a hair dangling in front of your eye behind your ear, and leans in to the uncovered ear.

"No, but I'd love to learn more about you, doll."

You shiver. Major bad vibes.

"My faith demands full purity, and celibate or abstention from the acts you're insinuating towards me."

You put one hand to her chest, pushing her off you. She groans and shuttles off.

"Oh, you didn't tell us you had to be deep in the purity thing before?" Pike babbles quickly, probably not understanding herself either.

"Not really.. I'm allowed to do whatever I want. People just leave me alone if I tell them I took a vow of chastity until marriage. Drunks aren't the most romantically interested, per se."

Pike, Vax, and Grog turn back to each other, now conversing on why the Tooth Fairy is very real and very dangerous. What did she do to them? Take the tooth and leave? Uegh.

You pause, figuring out what you're gonna do. You go back to the windowsill, sitting next to the Chaperoning Percy.

"Ever been romanced, 'Vow of chastity'?" Percy mocks your excuse to shake off the women.

"Yeah yeah whatever. I bet you're just jealous I actually have dated people all round' the clock." You looked away from him, rolling your eyes.

"You have?" Percy asks, a bit surprised and just the tiniest pinch of envy in his voice.

"..No." You stifled a laugh looking at the face he was making towards you. He cleared his throat.

"You're a good liar. Maybe it's just your poor drinking habits."

"Probably. I'd never lie this hard otherwise."

"Yeah right, let's all forget the time you tripped Grog purposefully and pretended it was an accident." He scoffed.

"You vowed to me you'd never talk about it again!"

#Percival de rolo #percy de rolo #percy x reader #percival x reader #vox machina #the legend of vox machina #x reader #pike trickfoot #grog strongjaw #vex and vax #tavern #fluff #alcohol #drinking

185 notes · View notes

chelleztjs18 · 2 years ago

Text

The Monsters Within (N.R) Pt. 4

Dark!FemReader x Natasha Romanoff (Modern AU)

Summary: You like Natasha and you are keeping her to yourself. Natasha's true self slowly shows up.

Warning: This is Dark Fic, 18+. A lot of swearing words. Graphic and gore descriptions, kidnapping, mind manipulations / brainwashing, death, violence, bone crushing and stockholm syndrome, blood kink (if you squint). Let me know if I miss anything.

A/N: Hello hello! I'm back with the last part of this series then next is the epilogue! Thank you Lou @honey-sweet-hiraeth for helping me n for the brilliant ideas for the ending. Also thank you for encourage me to step out of my comfort zone on writing it. Happy reading! and forgive me..

Series Masterlist || Main Masterlist

After you let Natasha go, the house feels empty. She left a hole in your heart. Just like her, you miss her immediately but you love her and you want her to be happy. You were sure that she would come back but you start to doubt it. It has been a month she hasn’t shown up to your door. You are mad and disappointed, not to her, but to yourself.

Missing her is already hard to deal with and all these other feelings are just making it harder for you. You have nobody else. This is just another “Wanda” all over again. You killed for her but just like Wanda, Natasha left you. All the special moments both of you had, did it mean something to her? What about the kiss? You asked the same question about it.

A similar internal fight happens to you. Part of you doubts her that she will come back and make your hope disintegrated. Another part of you still believes that she loves you and will come back.

All this leads you to your old coping mechanism even though you doubt that it will fully do its job but you still do it anyway. You are on a killing spree. Like the angel of death, you take souls more often than usual. Like a judge, you give death sentences to any random people you pick to feed the unending blood thirst monster in you.

Without any question, James helps you and he tries to keep up with you on getting rid of the soulless bodies. The loyal man stands by you every night you are dismembering your victim and passes him limb by limb so he can squeeze them into the bathtub before soaking them in the pool of acid.

You usually drown the whole body in the bath of acid but tearing them apart to pieces before that, helps you a little to let out your dismay and keeps your mind busy from thinking about Natasha.

The feeling when the big sharp steel knife forces its way through the skin, cutting through the muscle until it reaches the joints drags out your anger of you slowly but so relieving for you. It makes you feel that you gain back the control over your emotion.

The rusty blood scent spreads strongly when it flows out, shakes your senses and triggers the hemoglobin flow rapidly in yourself like it’s a shot of steroid that keeps your adrenaline rush going crazier. The slicing sounds of the cut tendon and that weird yet satisfying noise right when the joints are separated forcefully playing around through your ear releasing something indescribable in you.

Victims after victims and no matter how many limbs you cut, you still feel empty. None of them can tame the insatiable urge of killing nor the feeling of having Natasha around you.

_____

Natasha’s eyes are watching the T.V but not her mind. Her body is there sitting with Maria, watching the news but her thoughts are busy thinking about something else, or you, to be precise.

Her mind ponders the questions of how are you and what are you doing right now. She can’t lie to herself, she has the wanting feeling to know if you are okay after she left you for over a month. Her heart is barking orders at her to go back to you.

She is far lost in her thoughts. The sounds of the TV flew past over her head right away. Her eyes look empty, staring at one spot of the screen without even following what’s on it.

Maria’s voice that’s calling her name and a nudge on her arm drag her attention suddenly. Her gaze shifted to her friend next to her. “Huh? What is it? Sorry I didn’t hear what you said.”

“Are you okay? I was talking about the news. Look, they are talking about the number of missing people has been increasing in a little over a month.” said Maria in concern.

Her stomach turns into a knot and lungs are emptying on their own without her permission as soon as she hears Maria’s words. “Oh yeah, that’s horrible.” Natasha lets out her sympathy as her response.

“Do you remember our regular customer, Ms. Harkness?” Maria asks.

“Oh yeah. She is a cop, right? What about her?” the redhead returned a question back.

“Yeah, her. This is supposed to be classified but she told me that they might be all dead and the suspect might be a very smart serial killer because there’s no trace found until now.” more details flow out of Maria’s lips.

Natasha starts to feel unease from everything she hears as she swallows her nervousness down. Her brain connects all the lines of information straight to you. She knows that it was all your doing.

“Did–did they find any clue who it was?” The Russian stuttered in her question.

“Unfortunately they didn’t. Not yet. Why Nat? Do you want to tell me something? You haven’t told me about everything that happened to you while you were gone. Are you ready to tell me more?” Maria asks back to back, pushing Natasha to an edgy point.

“I–I–need more time to talk about it, Maria.”

“I know, Nat but the earlier we tell the police that you are back the sooner you get the help you need. I don’t want to get in trouble for letting you stay with me without reporting the cops that you have been back for over a month now. Did you see the face of your captor or what they did?” The more Maria asks, the more anxious Natasha gets.

“No, I didn’t. It was all dark, no window. All walls. I couldn’t see the face and the person didn’t say anything at all whenever she came to give me food or clean clothes.” she rambles whatever false answer she can give to her curious friend so she would stop asking immediately. Her heart wants to protect you. She internally doesn’t want you got caught.

“Wait..wait.. She? So it’s a woman? She gave you clean clothes? I thought you said that an old lady found you on the side of the road, gave you a lift and helped you clean up? So the suitcase you brought wasn’t hers? You also told me that the clothes are some of her daughter's. I’m confused now, Nat. Which one is the right story?” Confusion and suspicion gradually grows in Maria’s thoughts when she recalls some part of the story that Natasha told her doesn’t match at all.

Maria tries to look at her eyes but she avoids them and her face slowly turns white pale. Natasha knows that she is on thin ice right now. She realized that she told Maria false details. Small unmatch details with the previous one and that definitely digs her own graveyard. All she can do right now is to cover the lies with another lie. “I don’t know, Mar. Okay? I don’t know! Please don’t push me. I need more time, damn it!” her voice was raised against Maria.

"Okay.. okay.. Nat. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to."

Without answering her bewildered friend, Natasha rushes to her room, locking her door and hoping that Maria won't demand the truth.

As silence dominates the whole bedroom, you easily come into her memories. Shortly, you are all she thinks about. She misses you, a lot. Internally, she is longing for you. As she is sitting on her bed while trying to calm herself from the pressure that Maria’s question gave her, her suitcase got caught in the corner of her eyes.

She remembers that you mentioned the burgundy envelope then opens it as soon as she finds it. There are some numbers that are indicated as the front gate and front door lock code of your house right after your address.

She proceeds to the lines of words you wrote.

“You can always come home to me whenever you want.”

Her heart wrenches yet warmth soothes inside her. She can’t deny her feelings any longer. She misses you and wants to be with you. Without any assurance whether Yelena is still alive or not, now you are all she has. To Natasha, you are her home now. Living with Maria won’t make her life easier if she wants to keep your secret safe. Sooner or later, Natasha will be trapped in the corner of truth.

Without a doubt, Natasha decides to run away from everything and come back home to you. She packs her only belongings in the suitcase you gave her and waits until the right time for her to leave.

She sneaks out in the middle of the night and takes a taxi ride to you. The closer she is to your residence, the more sure she is that she made the right decision. Her doubt and denial evaporate. She is leaving her past life behind to be with you willingly. Filled with thrills, Natasha can’t wait to be in your arms again.

As soon as she gets off her ride home, she quickens her steps towards your gates. The beeping sound as the gate automatically unlocked right after she pressed the numbers sending a dash of feelings that made her walk even faster to the front door.

She presses the other lock codes and she opens the door right away. She scurries to the living room but you are not there.

With a smile, she naturally led herself to your shared bedroom by passing the kitchen. Her heart wrenches yet warmth and joy bubbling inside. She can’t wait to see you, give you the hug that she actually craves.

As soon as Natasha's feet led her to the kitchen, her smile quickly dropped and turned into a frown. Her excitement and the joy in her shredded into pieces in a second and they are quickly replaced by anger. The warmth that bubbled in her is now turned into a hot boiling jealousy mess.

Her heart pounds and her face feels warm from how she is feeling right now. The redhead is furious right after her green eyes catch another woman in your house with you. A brunette who is slightly shorter than you is standing in front of you with her hands touching all over you and her lips catching yours in a kiss.

Her body feels like she just got hit by a huge wave that weakens her knees but her anger supports her to stand strong.

Both of you and the woman don't see that Natasha is in the kitchen and she takes advantage of it.

Natasha doesn’t make any sound no matter how much she wants to scream. As the silence shut her mouth, her mind and eyes were moving fast in a few seconds. Her brain is thinking what she is going to do as her eyes are spotting the kitchen knife that she knows where it is.

Natasha goes ballistic and marches furiously towards the brunette right after her right hand grabs the sharp huge kitchen knife. The redhead is livid and she quickly grabs the stranger that pisses her off so badly by the hair, dragging her away from you. The startled woman screams from the pain from the pull of her hair.

With all the energy she has, Natasha pins her to the wall then her left hand quickly chokes the woman in front of her as hard as she can.. She looks at her with so much jealousy and hatred while the woman gasps for air and speaks at the same time. “Let..me..go. Who are you?” as she tries to pull Natasha's grip of death.

Everything happens too fast. By the time you try to grab Natasha, she tilts her head and watches her gasp louder as she stabs her and pulls out the knife right away out of her abdomen. Blood flows out of her wound and drips off the sharp weapon that sliced through her. From where she stabbed her, you know it’s fatal and too late to save her.

Natasha watches the crimson fluid out of her mouth and overflow her hand as she loosen up her grip then throw her to the ground.

Natasha turns her head to you but she hears the dying voice call your name. “Y/n. h–help”. SHe hates her calling your name and it drives Natasha crazy into a whole nother level. She quickly turns and straddles on her bloody and wounded lower body while the woman tries to fight weakly.. With both of her hands Natasha raises the knife and stabs her once more and that's when she took the first life out of someone.

You watch Natasha stab her again..and again..and again. Burying the knife in any part of her body she can. She doesn't even care if it thrusts into the same wound.

The sound of every lunge mixed with her grunts sound so clear in your ear delivers an indescribable feeling in you.

Blood pools around the now lifeless body and splats around the cabinet doors. Natasha's hands are now drenched in deep red colors.

You are appalled yet proud of her that she finally releases and accepts the monster in her. You just didn't expect who would be the first person she killed.

After the 16th stabs, Natasha finally stopped. She is trying to catch her breath as she stands up and turns around to you. She tossed the bloody knife away and wiped the splattered blood off her face with her forearm only ended up leaving some more smudges on it.

"Fuck, that feels so good." She said it casually and in a relieved tone as her forest green eyes looked at you.

You always knew she would look a lot more attractive with someone’s blood on her skin. Your brain is stunned with not just how she looks and what she did but it is also thinking what to do next to the dead body on the floor. You can’t deny it, no matter how proud you are of her, you are still a little shocked.

You look at her and finally break your silence. “That was Wanda.”

As soon as she hears the name out of your lips, Natasha quickly looks at the dead body with wide eyes as she bites the inside of her cheeks shortly before she asks “Are you mad?”

“I probably should be.” you answered as you glanced at the body as well then looked back at Natasha.

Silence covers the atmosphere in the kitchen along with the rusty blood scents that slowly spread. None of you say anything. Natasha is waiting for what you will say next while you are thinking.

After a good few minutes of silence, you start laughing a little. Her lips slightly open in a pinch of surprise from your reaction. She sees you walk closer to her. “Let’s clean this up.” you suggest slightly before you kiss her lips and you can taste a little bit of Wanda’s blood off her lips then you walk to do what you have to do next.

Natasha smiles from the giddy feelings your kiss gives her.

_____

You could’ve dragged Wanda’s body to the basement by yourself but Natasha insisted on helping. “This bitch..She touched and KISSED you and now even when she’s dead, she’s still a pain in the ass to get rid of.” she complains in between grunts as she helps you on putting Wanda into the tub.

“Watch it, Natty. She’s Wanda. No matter what, she’s part of my life.” you look at her in a teasing smile but there’s still a pinch of seriousness in your words.

“What? It's true. She is a pain in the ass. She’s so tall and it’s hard for me to put her in this freaking bathtub.” another complains out of her pouty lips, complete with a frown on her face.

“How did she get here anyway?” she asks in a more irritated tone yet curious as she shoves Wanda’s hand into the bathtub.

“I saved her from her ex-boyfriend and she didn’t want to be alone.” you shrug your shoulders at the same time you give her your answer. “Vision? What did he do?” Natasha pitches back another question.

“Turns out he is abusive just like her father.” you explain as you gather a bunch of big jugs of acid next to the claw footed tub.

Natasha lets out a sarcastic chuckle. “Funny world. Anyway, did you kill him?”

“Unfortunately, no. We were in public.” you let out a disappointed sigh with your answer while you open each cap of the prepared jugs. Natasha can see and knows just from your sigh how much you wanted to kill him. A question popped up in her mind.

“Will you love me more if I kill him for you?” she questions as her eyes search for yours, waiting for your answer like a little puppy.

You can’t help yourself letting out a little laugh. “Cute.” It was the only word that you said.

“I’m serious. I will kill him for you, Y/n.”

“Oh believe me, darling. I know you will.” You give another quick kiss on her lips then you grab the acid.

A second before you pour it, Natasha stops you. “Wait! Allow me to pour it on my first victim.” Natasha expresses her bone chilling request in a disturbing playful proud tone along with a small giggle then takes it from your hands.

You smile and let go of your grips. She takes it as a yes from you. In silence and with gentle eyes, you look at her pouring the dangerous liquid. Amazement screamed so loud on her facial expression as her eyes rounded with thrills while watching the effect that the chemical substance gave on Wanda’s skin, slowly..inch.. by..inch.

Natasha even makes sure that she doesn’t miss any spot. A soft satisfied gasp crack the silence and flew straight to your ears as soon as she watches it burn the skin and forcefully rip its pores.

As soon as she thinks she is done with it, Natasha takes a delighted deep breath and exhales. She turns her head to you with a smile. “So, any other ex’s I need to take out?”

You laugh. “You are horrible.” and shake your head while you fill up the bathtub with more acid.

“I’m no worse than you.” she replied with a smile. And just like that, both of you casually talking and teasing each other as if nothing happened in front of Wanda's slowly dissolving dead body.

You smile at her with such adoration.

"Then we are just a couple of monsters aren't we, Natty?"

"Yes, we are." Natasha finally accepts the monsters within.

Epilogue

A/n: Welp, that's it for today! Let me know what you think. Feel free to come to my ask or message. Reblogs and comments are highly appreciated! Follow me for more and see you in the epilogue or my other works.

Cheerio!

Taglist: @madamevirgo @musicinourlips @unstable-sapphic-hoe @fanboy7794 @chloe7076 @b0mbdotc0m @trikruismybitch @ichala @californianwhiterabbit @honey-sweet-hiraeth @imfuckinggenius @sxfwap @chaekhan @daenerys713 @luvmcgrath @stupidsapphicsstuff @pattypavo @frvny @franfineashell @heyyoweveryone @ygtft-chen @yaaskasey @sweeet-likeeee-cinnamonn @paumxmff @dopeyouth @beaniejennie @ineedafinghug @idkwhatimwriting @lucydiibi @mainly-rebloging-fics-i-like @gloriousfoxruins @grxvitye @mcubreakdown101 @aos22 @wandanatstan @paulawand @yeeterthekeeper @femalehomosexual666 @snowdrop1026 @modernmonalisa @nothingisrealanyway @idamaemann @sweeterlust @royalityofmultifandom @playboysaleen @peabrain112 @gwhaley127 @harleyswanda @bodhi-j @darth-rainbow @cristin-rjd

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x y/n #natasha romanoff x reader #dark natasha romanoff #dark natasha romanoff fanfic #black widow #black widow x y/n #black widow x you #dark black widow #black widow x reader #dark fic #dark mcu #the monsters within au

187 notes · View notes

scentedchildnacho · 2 months ago

Text

I told the pastor I have an I survived story about homelessness.....so I was terrorized.....so I dont think too much anymore and dont take anything if its not given directly....it is that i go into these meditative states and don't try to cope outside of patience

I would notice wab kinew it is like a genocide and if they wont give me my bank card to take care of things safer then program then wealthier people dont take things or go there either

People kill the register attendents and it doesnt help to have populations around

I can kind of tell you each incident....but night stalking for frequenting business and I don't ever want habits transactionalized ever again

Their businesses call cops on people and random criminals show up who dont appear to be anyone or affiliated with anyone and explain to businesses like Walmart that if financial profiling starts and cop calls that they will stab them in the throat

The jail has been for research purposes a long time not for criminals and businesses werent honestly reporting its just people being a fucko

That people just missing and that man lives next door....

Jobs is really arrogant and incorrect about freeing prostitutes from worst pimps some french restaurants if the manager pimp doesn't like having to train a waitress in a bar meal they do just grab bar stools from them till they really fall and smack their ass

Its everything women's schools in North Texas it's people being told that they should not masturbate....i find beach ass a foundational statement that women may not experience sexual enjoyment and satisfaction till I dont care if myrtle beach tells strippers that if they shock the public with exhibitionism anymore that the cops will tell their pimp they will do something for him

Men who own houses have shown me pig tie ups before and a lot of smoke so im a little those models were maybe tied up and the cops at least will start registering them ...

They shut down seal hunting and women became a body product

Stripping and the construction industry and torture with tools.....it's most notorious wardens instead of cops so

I had to be in new mexico so the engineering not charming from the veteran pride parade.....in car engines like rockets is a very very maddening noise till it's fine if you will promise you will stop fucking with neighborhoods then build a jail then

I told the pastor separatism in shelters is better ...and that I go to shelter because I do want a positive change in my life ...I do want to transform mentally and cope better and stop thinking I have to survival level life

But families for the most part is a positive influance but if it's families they often are required to take families that hit the children about it and I don't need that and dont want to see it ever....

And allowing singles with families becomes a families take any jurying and perpy people try to go around the children so it's just no singles

Thats men and women sometimes it's positive to see a nice couple work it out together sometimes the man will want to treat his homeless lady kind of roughly and that also ...I don't need exhibitionism or drama and don't want to see it in any way....so controlled separation is better

I told the pastor i don't talk to my family.......my sister married my brother in law and his family is fairly large and that occupies her a lot ...my birth father and sister died ...and my sister has always kind of escaped the nuclear family obligation by going to her friends or her husband pretty young.....

I was put on illegal doses of codeine young because I was very angry at them about my health considering their assumptive migration to mexico needs and I had to learn more about how medical works and why they didn't mean to

My mother kept taking me to doctors causing me respiratory arrest so they did try to murder all of us most of my life and we all escape that in any way we can

Anyway my mother told me when I was really really crazy that I had to just go to a sal army....and so it's if your going to harass me to just get over it then fine mom if you don't want to die better then them then go make dangerous choices if I should just go away

Then I had to find out about Scotland and education choices she could have made for me by title but not really by experience....so it's just if that lady never wanted to give me much but these scary Jewish austerities and ethics then....fine

I told the pastor I don't really mind the fights at shelter it's just sticks and stones but words don't ever truly hurt me.....and they give me information about what the conflict is actually about it's a lot deeper and more complicated then ALIX will do journalistically

Alix is a good journalist but it's not actually that basic....

They called us tribals and a lot is binary....they support farve they don't need their sponsorship brought down by non profit theory and they find police research interesting to destroy my democracy and try to control me extremely

They shut down seal hunting so it isn't though about land or whatever it's about I get weapons and what I may do with my personal independence and freedom my money

Pastor said the devil has lost he has been sent to hell and tortured.....and that's just not Godly is it

God would not reject anything or anyone no ...God did it God created this

Stop child abuse focus on that problem focus on what's important about it

Waldensians to catharists gotta grow big and strong cannot bother with vegan nothing and wealth that's not duty and obligation that's not sacrifice and helping courage to be some vegan

Big voice American you cannot talk little anymore about use to do that with grandma no

0 notes

our-dumbass-of-sorrows · 2 years ago

Text

well it's thanksgiving again, which means it's time for my bizarre tradition of listening to this song while I eat dinner

#i forgot to hit post on this earlier lol #going three years strong 💪#actually i may have skipped last year #in my defense a family member had just Died! so i believe i am excused #anyways it started as a random way to cope with all of the noise my family made and now look at where we are 🔥 (i am more depressed now)#mcr #my chemical romance #Spotify

4 notes · View notes

popes-jj · 3 years ago

Text

Paradise on Earth - Pogues x Routledge!OC PART 1

Summary: this story follows Cassie Routledge, John B’s twin sister through the events of OBX seasons 1+2.

Parings: rafe x Routledge!oc + Routledge!oc x the pogues + some JJ x Routledge!oc + everyone else.

[specifically rafe x Routledge!oc]

Disclaimer: kind of fanon rafe in some future parts, this is not condoning this type of relationship or Rafes behaviour, this is not me saying anything, it is just a story. Also in this, I have changed Rafe to be 18 and OC & the pogues are 17 in s1 not 16 :)

Warnings: mentions of drugs/drug use, mentions of death, violence, mention of violence, sexual innuendos, mentions of sex (not detailed), toxic relationships, unhealthy relationships, sad content, psychotic behaviour/tendencies, bad mental health, abuse, sexual language, swearing. (I think that is all)

This is my own work but I do not own OBX or their storyline or characters!!!

MASTERLIST

The Outer Banks. Paradise on Earth.. or so they say. For people like Cassie Routledge, it was just home. Well, the cut was at least, born and raised where she lived with her brother and father, that was until her father went missing 9 months ago. Lost at sea..

It had been hard for Cassie and John B since their fathers disappearance, they lived alone in their 'Chateau'. They tried their best to cope with the bills that just seemed to very stop, and their friends constant need to party and drink, not that the two didn't partake, they did of course. Cassie's day to day was mostly parties and constant noise from their friend group.

They all proudly call themselves Pogues, all of them being born and raised in The Cut, almost all anyway, Kiara was the only exception to that, have being a Kook initially, but they welcomed her in the Pogue life.

__________________

"That's what, a three-story fall to the deck?" Cassie opened her eyes to Popes voice breaking the groups comfortable silence. "I give you about a one-in-three chance of survival." Cassie rolled her eyes, looking up at her brother that was balancing on top of the buildings roof. Idiot.

"Hm.." John B licked his finger, pointing it to the air. Everyone's attention now on the boy above. "Should I do it?" He asked, a smile on his face.

"Yeah you should jump. I'll shoot you on the way down." Pope laughed, holding a drill tool up towards the Routledge boy.

"Yeah, let's see if you can break both legs at once." Cassie spoke up, standing up from her position on the floor. Hand over her eyes so she could get a proper look at her brother. This wasn't uncommon for the group, to be sat around a construction site on a random evening, summer had just started and they had already found themselves to be bored.

"You'll shoot me?" John B spoke, amused by the boy below.

"Yep."

The two made shooting noises to each other, JJ and Cassie locked eyes, and laughed slightly to each other, amused at the two boys being stupid.

Kiara stormed out of the unfinished building, clearly annoyed. "They're gonna have Japanese toilets with towel warmers.."

"Of course!" JJ spoke up, "Why wouldn't they?"

"This used to be a turtle habitat but who cares about the turtles, I guess.." Kiara said, looking around.

"I can't have cold towels!" JJ joked.

Kiara looked up at John B, as he stood upon the roof still. "Can you not kill yourself please?" She asked.

"No!" Cassie whined, jokingly. "If he falls, I get a bigger room. John B, as you were." She smiled at her brother who faked being hurt, putting on a fake frown at her.

"Wow, feelings are hurt, Cassandra."

"Oh, shut up." She rolled her eyes at the use of her full name, she walked over and climbed up and perched herself to be sat next to JJ on some scaffolding, snatching the beer from his hands and taking a sip.

"Don't spill that beer, I'm not giving you another one!" JJ shouted up.

John B lifted his leg up, trying to balance on the edge of the roof, his beer falling from his hand and slamming against the deck. "Good job!" Cassie put her thumbs up to her brother who just laughed.

"Of course you did! Right when I asked you not to." JJ laughed as John B groaned about his fallen beer.

"A plus!" Pope clapped.

"HEY!" A deep male voice shouted.

"Hey, uh, security's here." Pope said calming, leaning over the wooden railing. "Let's wrap it up."

"Humpty Dumpty, let's roll." JJ called to John B.

JJ hopped down off the scaffolding and held his arms out of Cassie. "M'lady" Cassie took the help down and ran off into the house with her friends, all laughing as they did so.

The guards chased the group through the house, trying to catch them, almost catching JJ as he slid over the floor. The five of them hopped the fence and made it to their van, 'The Twinkie', John B in front seat, Cassie hopped in next to him in the passenger seat. Kiara made it to the back and left the van door open for JJ and Pope to hop in as they had small trouble getting over the fence.

They all laughed as they continued down the road, van door wide open as JJ jokingly called after the guard that was chasing them down on foot. "C'mon Gary!" JJ taunted.

"You're gonna give him a heart attack!" Kiara laughed.

"I don't know, Kie, I think he looks thirsty!" Cassie called out from the front.

"I think you are right, Cass. Hey, Gary! Want a beer?" JJ threw a beer at the running security guard, "They don't pay you enough, bro!"

"JJ, stop! Stop." Kiara sternly told the blonde boy.

"Oh, C'mon. That sort of the initiative is begging to be punished." JJ laughed, looking back at the guard. They closed the van door and continued on their drive, laughing whilst doing so.

"Okay, so, party tonight?" JJ spoke up as he rolled a blunt, resting his head against the back of the drivers seat.

"Is that even a question at this point?" Cassie asked, holding her hand out to the blonde boy. He placed the blunt in her hand along with his lighter. She studied the lighter for a second, rubbing her thumb over the words 'JJ' that was carved into the silver lighter.

"No.. well- I don't know. Sometimes Pope isn't fun Pope and has to 'study'" JJ made quote signs in the air with his hands awkwardly, watching as the Routledge girl placed the blunt between her lips and lit it. "Pope?" He asked, turning away to look at the boy.

"It's summer, J." Pope looked around confused, unsure if the boy was making a bad joke.

"Great! Lovely to hear!" JJ clapped his hands together and turned back to Cassie. "Cassie, if I may?" Cassie handed him back the blunt reluctantly, getting a small glare from John B.

parts 1-3 up on my wattpadd now :)

113 notes · View notes

realcube · 4 years ago

Text

comforting you during a thunderstorm ⛈

summary: you’re not much of a scaredy-cat but you do have an immense fear of thunder storms which you didn’t tell him about. so this is how he comforts you

characters: saiki k, bokuto, suna

tw// thunderstorms, hurt/comfort

thanks to anon for the wholesome request 🥺 this reminds me of ohshc & i love it so much 💞

Kusuo Saiki

he just popped downstairs to bid farewell to his mother before she headed out to buy groceries, leaving you and him home alone

he didn’t even notice the thunderstorm, until his mom mentioned it

‘oh, i have to walk to the bus-stop in this horrible weather. is there anyway you could make it stop, ku?’

as much as he wanted to say ‘yes, but i cba. cope.’ he just blurted out a ‘no.’ before heading back up to his room

he didn’t think you were scared of anything tbh

i mean you killed a cockroach for him one time so you were basically a fearless god, in his eyes

so imagine his surprise when he walked into his room and..you were gone

he was confused for a moment until he heard faint sobs and whimpers from inside his closet

he slid the door open to reveal you cowering in the corner with your knees pulled up to your chest and your face buried between them, sniffing and only moving when you had to use your hand to wipe away the tears that poured from your eyes and threatened to stain your leggings

‘i go for a minute and this is what happens-- are you crying?’

that was when you realised that saiki had entered the room once again and when you looked up, you saw his tall, daunting figure looking down at you - the glow from the lightening behind him not doing any favours as it just made him look even more unnerving

‘i don’t cry. i’m just.. excreting my eye juices. it clears your skin-- ah!’ you tried to explain but you were cut of by another boom of thunder rattle through the house

‘you’re lying.’

yeah, you knew he was a psychic so you weren’t really sure why you thought you’d be able to get the lie passed him

also, due to his psychic abilities and common sense, he figured that the thunder/lightening was the reason for your distress

saiki sighed, not really sure if he should do what he was about to but upon seeing how frightened you were and the nervous series of continuous thoughts rushing through your head...he just had to

you heard another noise which sounded rather different from thunder but it startled you none the less

you looked up at your boyfriend for comfort, only to notice that he was gone

then, you caught a glimpse of something unusual from the window

you approached it hesitantly and peered outside to see the cluster of storm clouds being swept aside like dust by some unknown force, to reveal the bright blue sky that was hiding behind it

you were in awe and although the masses probably thought this was the work of god or the wind, it didn’t take long for you to figure out that it was your psychic boyfriend who was behind it all

‘it’s gone now.’ his voice tickled your ears from behind and to say it gave you the fright of your life was an understatement

you jumped, alarmed at first but once you turned around for your eyes to meet his, you couldn’t help but feel a wave of relief wash over you

‘oh, yes. thank you, saiki!’ you chirped, throwing your arms around him and pulling him into a tight embrace

he was a bit taken back at first but it didn’t take long for him to melt into your touch and hug back, cradling your head and patting it bc i hc that is how he hugs/cuddles

(he just wants you to feel safe with him 🥺 even though he is an OP psychic who could probably kill you if he’s not careful)

anyway, saiki will ensure that you never experience another thunderstorm for as long as you live

Kōtarō Bokuto

you already know that the first thing bokuto is going to do when he sees you cry and cuddle up next to you and cry too so you don’t feel embarrassed

but like when he comes back from the kitchen and heating the pizza he was about to eat, then he noticed you curled up under a blanket on the couch, shivering and whimpering..he drops the pizza

like he is so shocked

he didn’t want to believe that you were crying tbh

but as your bf it was his duty to comfort you

bc you always comfort him so well when he feels down and he wants to do the same for you!!

anyway, the first thing he does is join you under the blanket and cry with you for a bit

but his fake wails are so bad that you can’t help but laugh FVHIDBFA

once he notices that he’d cheered you up slightly, he’ll inquire, ‘are you scared of thunder?’

you nodded slightly, gently leaning your head on his strong shoulder, ‘a bit.’

bokuto bent his arm to pat and rub your head reassuringly, ‘but you’re so fearless, (y/n)! remember that time you went bungee jumping and even I was too afraid to do it?!’

you simply shrugged, tensing as you heard the thunder rumble through the living room

‘but anyway,’ bokuto hummed, placing a gentle kiss on your temple, ‘is there anything i can do to make you feel better?’

you shrugged once again, ‘maybe just stay with me for a bit longer, please.’

your wish was his command ✨

now there is no way he’s leaving your side until the storm passes

whether that takes a few minutes or the whole night

he’s not going to leave you even to eat the pizza he had dropped on the living room floor

and he hold you close against his chest so you know that he’s not going going anywhere

also, he started talking not only instinctively but also to drown out the sound of the thunder and redirect your attention onto him

‘and then kuroo was all like SUPRISE!! and i was all like THANKS, MAN BUT IT’S NOT EVEN MY BIRTHDAY and then kuroo was like I KNOW!! god, he knows me so well.’

‘hey, (y/n) - we should dress up for halloween his year! kuroo and his girlfriend are doing a couples costume so i think we should do one too and out-shine them! i was thinkin’ fred and daphne except you can be fred.’

‘i was looking on five minute crafts of food the other day - don’t ask why - and some of the desserts were lookin’ kinda tasty tbh. i’ll send you the link so we can make ‘em sometime.’

‘why did you comment ‘i’ll give you my first born child in exchange for you to crush my skull with your thicc, juicy, scrumptious thighs 🤤😳’ under my instagram pic? and why does it have 1k likes?’

needless to say, you can’t be sad for too when you’re around bokuto lmao

Rintarō Suna

RAIEVABTG DON’T EVEN LIE HE’D JUST BE LIKE ‘cover your ears den lmao’

ok ok so you’re on facetime with him and thunder blares through your room - it’s so loud that even he can hear it through the phone - and you jump, immediately pulling your blankets over yourself

he was hitting his vape then he pulled away to look at his phone again and you were gone (bc you had brought your phone under the covers with you and obvs it was dark)

he could also hear your little whimpers even though you tried you best to hide them by slapping your hand over your mouth

‘doll, where’d ya go?’ he inquired, concern laced in his voice. he opened his drawer to toss his vape away but he did not avert his eyes from the screen just in case something happened

‘i’m still here. just under the covers.’ you spoke, doing your best to hide how shaky your voice was

‘why?’ he puffed, allowing the vapor to leak from his mouth and escape out to his surrounding - which was his bedroom

‘oh, no reason.’

suna knew you were lying, it wasn’t hard to tell, ‘well, if that’s the case, can you come out from the cover, doll? i wanna see your face.’

‘-no.’ you immediately replied, letting out a feeble sigh as you realised that lying wasn’t going to get you anywhere. ‘i’m just a bit afraid of the thunder, that’s all.’

suna cocked his head to the side, ‘thunder? never heard that one before.’ he said, mentally cursing himself out just as he said that since it came out a lot harsher than he intended, ‘erm, why don’t you try putting your headphones on?’ he suggested in a soft voice, trying to make up for the uncalled-for comment he made

you hummed in agreement, wondering why you didn’t think of that

momentarily tossing your duvet aside, you rushed to your desk where you black headphones were laying, you picked them up and dashed back towards your bed as if someone was chasing you, diving onto it, pulling the cover back over your head and plugging the headphones into your phone before pulling them over your ears

‘this helps a bit. thanks, suna.’

suna’s eyes widened as he slumped back against his headboard, ‘suna? what happened to babe?’

‘thanks, babe.’ you corrected yourself with a giggle

now that suna’s voice was the most prominent sound in your ears, the thunder seemed to fade into satisfying background noise

you couldn’t get over the random flashes of lightening though, those always made you yelp - and he noticed this

‘i really wish you were here right now.’ you mused, hugging your pillow to your chest to imitate what you’d to if he was here with you, ‘i’d give you all my kisses.’

‘bet.’ was the last thing you heard before he hung up on you

you were quite bummed at first but then you registered that he was probably on his way over :))

and he was!

you heard a few loud knocks on your door followed by a monotone mutter ‘let me in, i’m freezing my tits off out here.’

ofc you let him in and after you led him to your bedroom, he immediately pinned you to your bed, ‘you know what i’m here for.’

‘huh?’

he was confused for a moment but then he noticed that you still had the headphones on

he snickered, momentarily pulling one of the earpads away from your ear to say, ‘kisses.’

479 notes · View notes

sweethome-silly-thoughts · 2 years ago

Text

✿•*`•.¸✯≫ Random Scenario (ig ??) || Cha Hyun-Su/Yoon Ji-Su

\NO MONSTERS AU/

-❀•≫ Okay so I was listening to Downtown by Anya Taylor-Joy (listen to it. It's good) and since I love daydreaming about Sweet Home with my fav songs it just. Kinda made me think abt Ji-Su and Hyun-Su a bit 💔

-❀•≫ As I said, Ji-Su tends to call him when she's drunk at 3am and he tends to get her to keep her safe and not let her alone in the streets that late

-❀•≫ He doesn't go out a lot, and it felt a bit anxiety inducing at first, but slowly he got used to it and going out late was a bit of a "comforting" thing, less noise, less agressive lights, and he can go out with short sleeves without ppl looking at his arm weird

-❀•≫ It also feels good because he helps Ji-Su, his presence is enjoyed, he's being useful, and he feels better having someone who care him (I feel like Ji-Su is the talkative drunk type and she probably all the shit that goes through her head when he's drunk, including nice words for her friends)

-❀•≫ Ji-Su is also happy to have him around, they tend to cope a lot together (after it took way too long to befriend him) so his presence is always appreciated and she minds less about appearing on her weaker side

-❀•≫ The magic is kinda cut out when she starts speaking about needing to barf and he just watches her do her thing a bit worried but also wondering how the hell he ended up here 💀 anyway they have a funny dynamic I believe I love them so much !!! The made up adoptive sibs I love the most

(Lyrics that inspired me btw I think they're cute :

The lights are much brighter there

You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares

So go downtown, where all the lights are bright

Downtown, waiting for you tonight

Downtown, you're gonna be alright now

Now

Downtown

And you may find somebody kind to help and understand you

Someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand to

Guide them along)

God damn this could be a fanfic plot but 1. I doubt it's good enough, just little thoughts going through my brain and 2. I'm too lazy to write it even if I could lmfao

#KINDA ASHAMED AND I DON'T WANNA TAG IT BECAUSE IT'S A BIT. PERSONAL MORE THAN MY REGULAR HCS BUT I NEED TO ORDER THINGS HERE #anyway hum. I love them a lot #still self conscious about it but I want to enjoy my little Sweet Home bubble without feeling GUILT.#sweet home #cha hyun su #yoon ji su #no monsters au #Lan's scenarios #idc if ppl disagree atp they have their hcs I have mines 👍 ya #btw NO I don't forget about Eun-Yoo and Hyun-Su dynamic Ji-Su doesn't replace Eun-Yoo in his healing process #Ji-Su was here for him and showed care for him the first Eun-Yoo helped him understand nothing was his fault #I believe the show was top focused on Eun-Yoo only when it came to Hyun-Su's healing and I wanna share the cake with more characters #especially Ji-Su because OOOH MY GOD THE WASTED FRIENDSHIP.#idk if i'll ever talk about it outside of the tags but yeah we'll see ?? idk if it's important enough #and I mean multiple ppl can help you heal anyway why tf am I talking abt this in the first place 💀 girl stop speaking in the tags 24/7

6 notes · View notes

stardustincarnate · 3 years ago

Text

YOU SHINE LIKE THE STARS, YOU LIGHT UP MY HEART // Touta Matsuda x Reader

word count : 2585 genre : fluff <33 (stargazing with this pretty boy!!)

It was a sight to behold—the empty of clouds but shrouded with twinkling stars with the right distance from one another. They were visible in every direction. What a perfect night to stargaze. You had just gotten out the yard of your family's house, accompanied by a cup of hot milk and cookies. Unfortunately you forgot to bring your eyeglasses so you had to head back inside—a surprise welcoming you when you saw someone who didn't belong in your house.

"Touta? What are you doing here?"

That was a little... impertinent. You felt guilty. It wasn't like you weren't happy to see him, you were just shocked. Plain shocked.

"Hey [Y/N]! Haha, good evening!"

He was a bit skittish, maybe nervous. You noticed how clammy his forehead was, with the reason being just finished looking at you through the loophole in the kitchen wall. "It's been a while. You look.. dazzling.. as always."

"If your definition of dazzling is someone who looks like a zombie who's just gotten out of bed, thank you." You smirked, wearing your glasses. "What made you come here anyway? Isn't it late? It's your day-off today?"

"Yup. Thought of visiting a.. friend. You see, I—I really missed you! Work hasn't been the same since you le—"

"Hm, I know that tone. Come on Matsu."

"Hey! It's not that I'm complaining! I still like my job, it's good. But it could be better if you're with us, despite your never-ending bad mood. Hehe..."

"Ooh, so you missed me, that's why you're here. You wanna catch up."

"Of course?" He sheepishly rubbed his nape. You smiled slyly and hummed, trotting back to the yard.

"Come. You're obliged to."

Matsuda followed, hesitant to sit beside you on the grass, only until you pat the space beside you. He kept on constantly shifting his legs as you munched on your cookies, offering him some. You two ate in silence, looking at nothing in particular as the night breeze hit you. The wind's eerily ethereal howl rung in your ears, blending with the faint sound of the television from inside.

He pursed his lips and looked at you, blushing while waiting for the right time to speak. You thought the same thing even without looking at him. After some time, you spoke, immediately cutting yourself off as he did the same. Of course, that's bound to happen.

"You go first."

"You're my visitor. I know you wanna ask me some things."

He fidgeted the hem of his shirt. "How.. How have you been?" You snorted, shaking your head fondly. "I'm fine, I guess. Nothing interesting though, really. No thrill in my new work plus my bitchy subordinates. I swear, Matsu, if I get full, they'll know I'm the worst of their kind."

"Show them who's boss [Y/N]! You do look scary and mean after all.. I mean—"

"Hey! I'm not as mean as I look like! I only am to Satan's spawns."

"I-I was kidding—"

"Chillax, of course."

"But at least you are actually kind and can cope with me."

"And your stupidity." You jested. He flushed pink and frantically shook his head.

"What's your new work anyway? Am I the only one among your peers who doesn't it yet?"

"Nah, they've no idea too. I'm currently working as a hotelier. But I think I'm... Is old-work-sick even a thing? Something like that."

"What hotel?"

"Not too far from the station. You just gotta grab a taxi and voila—you're there. Hm, why ask? Thought of visiting me frequently? Eh? Eh?"

"N-No! I mean.. why not? Just thought of.. visiting you during my free time, just to, you know, chatter with you. Because—because you boost my mood.. in some sort of way."

You felt your heart melt. "Aww, I'm happy. You do the same to me. And you know? I've thought of visiting you in the station as well."

"Really? You should! I—I mean.. only if you're free of course. I've been feeling out of place lately. They're still nice but I don't know. Maybe it's just me..."

"They're preoccupied with work, that's why they barely interact with you. Focus on your work, it'll make you less lonely." You said, plaintive.

"But I am focusing.."

"No, hocus focus! Not focus focus. You know what I mean?"

"That's vague, but okay?"

"And yeah, if I visit you, it won't be very frequent. I'm sorry Matsu, even if I want to. I don't want to get scolded by the inspector or the chief. I don't wanna get you in more trouble too. Even though I'd often, er, miss you, too."

The words came out, unbidden, and you mentally smacked your forehead. His eyes softened as you stared at him. He smiled, and you could tell that he was still restraining himself because even his eyes were smiling, his ears turning red. You found his smile cute and rather infectious. You cleared your throat. He averted his gaze elsewhere, mumbling.

"Why did you have to quit.. I wish you had stayed."

You sighed then pursed your lips. "Me too. But my parents don't like it anymore. Well to begin with, they never liked the idea of their only daughter being involved in a perilous job. But the arson was what really ended it all."

Matsuda looked crestfallen after you'd mentioned it. He clenched his fists. He could still remember that day vividly—the day you almost died. He remembered how he struggled to not look at the criminal because he was afraid he might start thinking of doing unjust things to the person who almost killed you. He sighed.

"I should've stayed with you. That would've never happened."

"No no, chin up Matsuu! The fire didn't even fully touch me 'cause even it was intimidated of how hot I am compared to it." You chuckled, casting him a wistful glance. "I was reckless. My bad. And that recklessness led to that. So take it from me. Think thoroughly before you act. I wouldn't want the same thing happening to you, you reckless bean."

"Noted Madame!" He laughed.

You smiled and looked up the sky, tapping his shoulder moments later.

"Yes, [Y/N]?"

"You stargaze often?"

"Not really. I can't remember the last time I did. Do you like stargazing?"

"Needless to say. I often do it. You should, too." You nudged his shoulder with yours, your proximity making you blush. You both threw your heads back and stared at the stars in silence. You began making random patterns. Matsuda giggled as he found one that looked like the initial of your name.. or as he had tried to convince himself.

"This peacefulness, it's my dolce vita! Nothing but the question of how many stars we could count. I can do this for hooours."

"Your neck will turn numb.. Mine's already feeling a little.. eh."

"There's no need to worry when we can just lie down."

You could see the redness of his cheeks after hearing that. You could almost giggle.

The two of you lay down on the grass, him spacing out a little. His shoulders were tense, his heart banging his sternum that he was afraid you'd hear just how loud it was. But eventually he relaxed when he saw you not minding the proximity at all.

Matsuda looked up, his smile growing larger and larger the more stars his eyes caught. But he had completely forgotten the counting-star-thing you said.

The night was silently still. Television from the inside had been turned off so the only noise you heard even from the distance was the sound of nature. You controlled your breath, afraid that it might disrupt the stillness. You began to grow lethargic from all the star counting. Alas, you gave up and stopped at number 42.

You looked to the side to see what progress had he made. None at all. He was not only staring at you—he was smiling! Looking at you like you are his world!

Once he realized you were also staring at him his face turned beet red. He wanted to look away, but how? There were you, exchanging stares of adoration. Hah. All that was needed was a label.

You had the strongest urge to lean in and kiss him. Kiss him? Oh [Y/N], control your thoughts! Sigh. If nothing would miraculously interrupt the stare session, you'd really kiss him.

Nothing. Nothing. The universe was in favor of you. And you know the drill.

You took the opportunity to face him and lift yourself up from the grass. Your stare could've frozen him on his position. He was going to explode in mushiness. It's almost like the wind was all it would take for your lips to press.

You rested your elbow on the grass and gently caressed his hair. You cupped his cheek with your other hand, your thumb circling it. You closed your eyes, praying you wouldn't fail this one. You did it slowly on purpose, but seemed like Matsuda opposed that. He inclined and cupped your face, kissing you.

But only for a mere second.

Your torso clumsily fell flat partially on him and the ground because of your initial awkward position. And you didn't even feel the kiss because of your forgotten eyeglasses.

"Aha...haha... Uhm—[Y/N]—you okay?? I'm—"

You sat up and boldly chuckled in spite of looking like a four-eyed tomato.

"That went veeeeery well."

"So.. ah.. the thing earlier.. moments ago—" It's as if he was trying to convince himself that it really happened. And he couldn't contain his infectious smile and laughter anymore that you were sure reached the entire neighborhood.

"What waaas that!"

You laid your glasses aside and tossed yourself at him. He fell on his back with you on his top, your legs in a tangled mess. As he wrapped his arms around your waist, he wheezed.

"I hope you're not dumb at this stuff because I hopelessly am."

"Whaddaya meaann?" You were certain he was teasing you. You clicked your tongue.

"....Silly! We're a couple now!"

"HAHAH—wait—you're not joking?? Are you?? No??"

"Do I look like I am?"

"Hah-hah, as in, you're serious-serious? [Y/N]??"

"Do I look like I'm not? Idiot of course I am! You want me to take it back?"

"Nonononono—" you tried your hardest not to cackle, "—I mean of course I do, but—ah! Stupid mouth! Uhm—well—if that's the case then why should I decline when I really like you for—for a long time now!"

"I'm going to pretend to be shocked. But I—I like you too.. I was just waiting for, uhm, you, to, uhm, confess to me, but that sounds so unlikely.. So, thank you for staring?"

He stared at you eagerly.

"Darn it, that wasn't cool! Nonono—you know what I mean, don't you...? You stared at me, and I wanted to kiss you, and then we're here.. And and—"

"I love you!"

Matsuda hugged you tighter as you became stiff and red with what he just uttered. It's either you move and explode or you don't, so you didn't.

I love you ...

He loves you. And he means it.

You squeezed your eyes shut and bit your lower lip, though unable to restrain a smile.

You cleared your throat.

"M-Matsu... Do you want to stay the night here?"

"Oh, no! Actually.. I should be heading home by now. I've got work to do tomorrow morning."

"Awh bummer I forgot.. Well, let me assist you back there."

"Thank you. I'll.. I'll visit you more often, I promise! Ah—ahem! It's one of my duties now that I'm your boyfriend.." He rubbed his nape, shy in proclaiming. You blushed.

"Hey, but you can't just disappear from your work otherwise the chief will beat your ass. Besides, you're a baby! Can't have a baby constantly slacking off his work, can we?"

"Hey! I am a tough police officer! I'm far from being a baby like you!"

"Ohohoho look who's whining like one!"

"I—If you keep saying that I really won't visit you!"

"Fine with me. I'll just find others to hang out with."

His sulky pout fueled your eruption of cackling. You put your head on his shoulder and wrapped your arms around his waist from the side.

"I'm only kidding! Of course I only have my eyes set on you!"

"That better be true.. or I will arrest that man trying to steal my girl." He squished your cheeks. "Oh, and that reminds me—I have something to say to you.."

"I bet on my life it's gonna be one of those pickup lines.."

"No no this is a good one, promise! Ehem. Are you a cr—"

"DON'T! I just know what you're going to say! No no no!"

"I haven't even s—"

"I heard that pickup line way to many times already! Don't you dare!"

Matsuda sighed. "At least I tried.. I just wanted to make you smile.."

You shifted behind him, back-hugging him and patting his tummy as you rested your chin on his shoulder.

"There is no need for that when just seeing you can already make me smile.."

Matsuda grinned, placing his hands above yours.

"I didn't know [Y/N] was so cheesy."

"H-Hey! At least it's not as bad as that 'are you a criminal cause you stole my heart' thingy you were going to say!" You protested. He laughed loudly as a response. "Psh. Time to go home now, officer."

"Uh...?" He looked back at you and your position.

"Go go go."

Still confused, he started walking through the backdoor, with you never letting him go. It was not an ideal position, and when he passed by your parents in the living room to bid them goodbye, they only snorted, unable to believe your clinginess.

Once you two were near the front door, you let go of him.

"Goodnight Touta. Please be safe on your way home. Text me as soon as you get home, okay?"

He opened the door, nodding. "Don't worry [Y/N], I will. Although.. I might be safer if you give me a lucky charm."

"What lucky charm?"

He pointed his cheeks. "...Here, please?"

"Aw I thought you'd never ask!" You leaned closer to peck his right cheek. But instead of his cheek, it was his lips that you kissed. Matsuda had turned his face a millisecond just before your lips could press his cheek. You couldn't help but smile in the kiss. He was, too. Eventually you two pulled away, with triumph written all over his face.

"Touta.. You.."

"Ahaha... Is that the time? Oh, byebye [Y/N]! Thank you for the lucky charm. Goodnight, dream a little dream of me!"

He kissed your cheek before leaving your house, looking back every now and then as he walked away, and still waving goodbye to you. You smiled and shamelessly threw flying kisses at him.

You closed the door once he was out of sight, leaning your back against it dreamily. You thought, that night couldn't get any better. You glanced to the right, your parents whose eyeballs looked like it would come out of its sockets greeting you. You laughed and shook your head before they could say anything, and then headed to your room.

And maybe you did dream a little dream of him that night...

#death note #death note x reader #touta matsuda #touta matsuda x reader #death note imagines #death note fluff #death note matsuda #matsuda x reader #death note x you #death note x y/n

77 notes · View notes

hold-our-destiny · 4 years ago

Text

5 times tony comforted Peter and the one time Peter comforted Tony

This is for @bluesweatshirt for the friendly neighborhood exchange!

(also i’m really sorry i couldn’t add in a cut off on mobile)

________________

Peter wasn't a sad person.

He wasn't too sad when his parents didn't come home from their business trip. Yeah, he was sad when Ben died- he died in front of him for god’s sake- but he didn’t show it, he sucked it up and helped May with the new struggles with money.

Peter wasn't sad, no. He was tired though.

God, he was so tired.

It had been two weeks since homecoming night and Peter was catering between not being able to sleep at all and waking up every night from nightmares.

This night was different, though.

Because for some reason… Mr Stark was in his nightmare.

It was never anyone but peter. Always Peter stuck under rubble, falling from a plane, stuck in the fire. Never anyone else so why now would it be Mr Stark?

That wasn’t exactly the first thought on his mind when he woke up.

___________

Peter woke up with a start, breath stuck in his chest, tears already escaping his eyes.

He threw the covers off him, needing to be free from the confines, before reaching for his phone.

He’s hurt, mr stark’s hurt and he can't help him- oh god he can't save him-

“Hello?” Mr Stark’s groggy voice shook him out of his thoughts.

“Mr Stark?” Peter asked, almost scared for any reply.

“Pete? You okay?” His mentor’s voice took on a new tone. Worry mixed with… something.

“Yeah, sorry, i just- I’m sorry for waking you- I’ll hang up now-”

“Peter. Are you okay?” The question made him want to cry, made him want to curl up and let it all out with how safe it made Peter feel.

“Yeah I’m-” he took a breath, “I’m fine,”

He could tell the billionaire knew he wasn’t, “Okay, well you might as well help me anyway,”

“Help you?”

“Yeah, i've been up for hours trying to figure this problem out,” He lied.

“O-okay”

The mechanic explained the problem to him, Peter letting the words wash over him, breathing through the explanation. He pretended not to notice when Mr Stark didn't ask for his thoughts, when he reminded him to breathe every now and then, just letting his words soothe the kid from the evident panic attack he’d just gone through.

God, he was so out of his element.

Maybe this was a good thing- maybe it was good for him to comfort this kid- this kid who he barely knew. Just for tonight, only tonight.

Tony was tired. No, scratch that- he was fucking exhausted.

He was pretty much ready to drop on that wednesday, ready to curl up in his king size bed and sleep for 16 hours straight.

And yeah, maybe he forgot it was lab day.

Peter walked- more like stumbled- through the lab doors, somehow racing and also shuffling to his seat, dropping his bag with a thud and sitting in his chair in almost the same manner.

Peter’s hair was messy, curls more unruly than usual, and Tony would bet that if he could see the kid’s eyes, they wouldn’t look healthy.

“Hey kid,”

No answer.

“You okay?”

A delay, then a slight nod. Peter still hadn’t put anything in front of him, just simply sitting at the desk.

“You wanna skip lab day today?”

Peter’s head shot up, eyes wide and concerned. And yeah, Tony was right, he had dark bags under his eyes.

“What? Is something wrong? Do you need me to leave?” Tony raised a hand to stop him.

“No- no- I mean more like…” He didn’t know how he was going to say this, “I’m pretty tired right now, do you wanna just order a pizza and chill out on the couch?”

Peter looked at him suspiciously, before nodding, already getting up and heading to the other room.

Yeah, tony thought to himself, you’re doing okay

______--

Peter was passed out on the couch within 5 minutes, remote laying in his limp hand and head lolled to the side awkwardly.

Tony brought the pizza in, setting the boxes down on the coffee table and gently shook Peter awake.

“Hey, kid,” He whispered as Peter woke up, matching the tone to the dark room, “You wanna have something to eat? Or at least get into more of a comfortable position,”

Peter nodded groggily, sitting up so Tony could sit next to him, legs touching as Peter moved closer. Tony raised his arm up and around the back of the couch, resting on the teenager’s shoulders and allowing him to relax into the billionaire.

Tony put a random star wars film on the tv, letting it drift into background noise as the kid fell asleep next to him.

For years, Tony had been scared of fucking a future kid up, becoming his father and eventually pushing everyone away. Somehow, now, his fears have receded, his mind reassuring him repeatedly.

He trusts you. You’re doing okay.

Peter woke up under rubble.

No, no, this wasn’t a nightmare. The air was too thick, dust invading his airways. He choked on it as he took a breath. It was too dark, way too dark, the rocks were crushing him, piercing his skin in multiple places. He groaned with the weight, reaching for his watch instinctively.

He pressed the side button three times, letting red light illuminate his surroundings and trying to breathe with the rubble pushing down on his chest.

His watch lit up blue, and Tony’s voice started speaking through it.

“Peter? Pete- you there?”

“Y-yeah I’m here” He choked out, a waver in his voice.

“Okay, how are you feeling, kid?”

“I- The rubble- it’s crushing me- i can’t-” His breath started to speed up at the reminder, panic invading his senses.

“Kid- kid! You gotta calm down, okay? We’re getting you out now, i promise- we’re gunna get you out real soon- but you gotta calm down for us to do that, okay?”

Peter made an affirmative noise, closing his eyes and trying to even out his breaths. His memories were resurfacing much quicker than he could cope with and Tony’s voice was only helping slightly. Peter didn’t know what he was saying, letting the noises meld together in his mind as he calmed himself.

After a few minutes- or hours, he didn’t know- he’d calmed down somewhat, finally able to focus on the voice coming out of his watch.

“We’re getting you out of there now, kid. You’re doing so good for me, Pete- just keep breathing for me, okay?”

With the panic receding now, Peter was much more aware of his surroundings. He was also aware of the fact that his brain was slowing down, unable to process things as quickly as he normally could. There was a reason for that in the back of his mind but he couldn’t reach it.

There was something wet underneath him, soaking up into his clothes, he didn’t like that. He wanted to move away from it but only made it hurt worse when he tried- he cried out in pain.

“T-tony!”

There was a scuffle on the other end of the line- “Yeah, pete? You okay?- what’s happening?”

“T’ny- t- tony! T’y please- g’t me out- please- please- i- i can’t-”

“Peter- what’s happening?”

“H’rts- my- my chest- there’s- it’s-” The panic was back now, confusing him even more than before, “S’mthing- und’r- something wet- under me- t’ny please-”

“Shit- Peter- Pete- breathe, okay kid? Breathe for me. We’re gunna help you,”

Peter took a breath, then another, and another, steadying his heart before whimpering when the rubble shifted, “Kid, we’ve almost got you. I need you to stay awake, okay? We’re gonna get to you soon but you gotta stay awake so you can tell us if we move the wrong thing, okay?”

Peter made an affirmative noise again, wanting nothing more than to move away from the pain, but listening to Tony.

Tony talked again a while later, surprising Peter when he did.

“Pete? You still awake for me, bud?”

“Y-yeah im- im here,”

He heard Tony breathe out slowly, “That’s good, Pete. We’re only a few feet away from you, but the next thing we’re going to move is gunna shift some stuff, okay? Tell us if it hurts you, okay, kid?”

“Okay- I’ll tell y’u”

He waited a few seconds, hearing some movement to his side, before the rubble shifted and his legs screamed in pain. He only let out a grunt, not wanting to stop the team’s efforts, and only a moment passed before he saw his father figure knelt down beside his head, cradling it with one hand. He smiled up at him.

“T-tony-” He sobbed.

Tony nodded, “Yeah, yeah, kid, i’m here now. Sorry we couldn’t get to you sooner but I got you now, i promise. You did so good for me, bud,”

“Good?” Peter’s eyes were closing now, relishing in the relief of pain after hours of panic.

“So good, kid. I’m so proud of you for staying calm. You can sleep now, okay? Let us do the rest.”

He smiled up at his mentor again, letting his eyes close and his body relaxed as his mind gave in to the not-so-distant pull of sleep.

Tony woke up that morning to a call from midtown tech.

Of course, he was confused as to why Peter’s school would call him at midday on a random tuesday.

“Is this Tony Stark?” The caller sounded dubious- doubtful.

“Yes, it is,”

“This is Julia calling from midtown tech. Are you the emergency contact for Peter Parker?”

“One of them, yes,”

“Would you be able to pick Peter up soon?” Tony was already getting some more presentable clothes on, worried as hell.

“Yes, of course. Can I ask why?”

“To be completely honest with you, Mr Stark, I don't even know. There’s a police officer in there with him right now, and that’s all i know.”

Tony froze. A police officer could only mean two things, and Tony didn’t like either option.

“I’ll be there in 10 minutes,” And with that, he hung up.

Peter practically fell into his arms when he walked into the office. Tony instinctively went to cradle the back of his head as he processed everything that was happening. One of those things being that Peter was crying.

Peter was crying.

He wrapped his arms around the teenager more firmly as the police officer stepped toward them.

“Mr Stark, I’m officer Langford,” Tony nodded curtly towards him, waiting for an explanation.

“You may want to sit down for this,”

It took some time for Tony to maneuver Peter into a more comfortable position on the couch in the corner, the kid not wanting his mentor to see his face- in fear?- but they got there in the end.

The officer sat down in a chair opposite them, “I’m sorry to tell you this but this morning May Parker was involved in a car accident, she was rushed to the hospital but unfortunately, she was pronounced dead on arrival-” Peter held him slightly tighter, “We called you here because you were Peter’s second emergency contact, and in situations like these, we need a temporary home for him. If you agree, you can take him home now, and if not we can move him to a separate-” Tony held a hand up to cut him off.

He moved the hand back down to rub across Peter’s back, meant to be a soothing gesture but somehow made him more tense.

“I’ll take him now, and i can sort out the paperwork for a… longer arrangement soon,” Officer Langford nodded before wishing them well and leaving, but Tony didn’t pay any notice, his mind too caught up in what just happened.

It wasn’t caught up in May’s death, somehow in the back of his mind, he knew, he knew that police officers didn’t just show up at a kid’s school for no reason. He wouldn’t have been called if it was anything else.

No, it wasn’t caught up with that.

It was caught up with the fact that Peter- his kid, his Peter- upon hearing Tony’s agreement to take him in- he lost all tension in his body. As if he was relieved, as if he feared Tony would leave him, as if he would abandon the kid he’s grown so close to lately.

Tony couldn’t process it.

“Hey, kiddo, can you look at me please?” Peter minutely shook his head, burrowing into Tony’s shirt even closer than before. His tears had long since stopped, now just seeking comfort from the billionaire.

“We’ve gotta be clear about some stuff, okay, bud? Just a few minutes and then we can go back to whatever this is,” Tony wasn’t good at this.

But, still, Peter pulled back from their embrace, head turned down towards his legs.

“Kid-” Tony was stuck for words, “i want you to know that you can stay with me for as long as you like, okay? If it’s just for this week, for a while or if it’s for the rest of your life, okay? I need you to understand that i’m going to stick with you through all of it, anything you need from me, I’ll get it for you,” He took a breath, “You’re not alone in this,”

Peter crumpled.

As if against his own command, his body surged forward, arms clumsily reaching for his father figure, breaths coming through as gasps, head still downturned.

But still, Tony caught him.

__________

Tony took Peter back to the tower, he set him up in his room, gave him food and sent him to bed. He figured they’d deal with talking about it tomorrow, after some good sleep and a long fucking think about how Tony feels about this kid.

That went to shit at around 4am.

Tony was up on his feet before he could process the scream, legs rushing him to the only inhabited room on his floor. Pushing the door open and hoping for the worst.

He really didn’t expect to see Peter in the corner, bed sheets crumpled around his feet, breaths barely present.

He kneeled down a few feet away, unsure about whether Peter needed him close or not. But upon seeing the kid reach out a trembling hand towards him, he surged forward, pulling the teenager into his arms.

“It’s okay, whatever it is, it’s okay, we’re safe. I’ve got you.” He repeated in hushed whispers, rocking the two of them back and forth.

It was only a few minutes later when Peter responded to him, breathing normally now, hand clutching his mentor’s shirt as he mumbled into his chest.

“Couldn’t- couldn’t save y’u- i- i can’- can’t do i’- pl’se t’ny-”

Tony hushed him.

Peter repeated the mantra for another- god, tony didn’t know how long- until tony was finally able to hush him. The billionaire carefully picked him up, walking him the few feet over to the bed and laying him down in it.

Tony hesitated by the door, before hushing his brain of all negative thoughts, turning off the light and retreating back into the teenager’s bedroom. He climbed into the bed with the kid, curling up next to him- relieved when Peter immediately turned to cling to his chest.

Slowly, he fell asleep.

To say Peter was worried about this mission was an understatement. Him and Tony were going undercover together and honestly… it was already awkward.

The thing is, Peter wouldn’t have any trouble going undercover normally but now, they were going in as father and son.

There was this guy- this villain they’d started calling the ‘poisoner’- who was targeting father and son couples, poisoning the son and leaving the father with the body until they were found. They’d tried everything to arrest the guy but… he kept getting away- going undercover was the only option- the last ditch attempt before the avengers started knocking on doors.

It was weird how Peter was more scared to act like Toy was his dad, when he could actually die if the other guy got the upper hand.

_______________

They were sat in the hotel room, waiting.

They saw the guy- the poisoner- earlier at the bar. He’d followed them all night, back to their room but… he hadn’t pushed his way in, always staying just too far away to be apprehended by Tony.

It took a few hours for there to be a knock at the door, Tony standing up and casting a quick look at Peter before going to answer it.

He opened the door to see him- the guy- the poisoner- dressed up as a waiter or something, pushing a cart in front of him.

“Can i help you?”

He smiled, “Room service, sir,” He started pushing his way past Tony.

“I’m sorry, but we didn’t order room service,”

The poisoner turned around quickly as he heard the door blow shut, quickly pulling Tony into a headlock and facing Peter, who was frozen in the shock of it all.

“Now I’m going to say this one time only,” He ignored Tony struggling in his hold, pulling out a gun from his waistband, “There’s handcuffs under the cart. You’re going to cuff yourself to the bed or I’ll blow your dad’s brains out,”

Peter moved slowly, sliding off the bed and keeping his hands visible. The man was the same height as Tony and didn’t look much bigger than him. Tony should be able to get out of his hold easily- there was a reason he couldn’t- and now he had a gun to his head.

He reached under the tablecloth, feeling the cold metal and pulling out three sets of handcuffs. He moved over to the bed again, cursing the hotel for having actual bed posts, and cuffed his left wrist to the bed, laying down on it to make himself more comfortable.

The man then pushed Tony away from him, pointing the gun at Peter this time and making fear rush through him, “Now you- cuff his other hand to the bed,”

Tony hesitated, making the man cock the gun, and Tony then quickly moved towards Peter, efficiently cuffing the teenager’s wrist, giving it a small squeeze of reassurance that didn’t do much to reassure him.

“Pull the chair away from the desk,” The poisoner commanded, “And cuff your hands behind it,”

Tony did so immediately, not risking Peter’s safety again. Only once he was situated did he start talking.

“You know you’re going to regret this,” The poisoner laughed.

“You really think so, do you? I know you’ve got this room bugged, i know the avengers are probably on their way here. But I’m here to send a message,”

“And what message is that?”

He paused, pulling the lid off the metal plate he brought in on the cart, it revealed a neat line of six vials, all full of a blue liquid.

“You need to pay for what you did,”

__________

As it turns out, the poisoner doesn't actually inject the poison.

No, that would be too merciful.

Tony’s handcuffed to the chair he’s sat in, facing the bed. The same bed of which Peter, his kid, the teenager who he’d grown to care for so much in the past year or two, was handcuffed to in an ironic parallel. Father and son. Mentor and mentee. Tony, the merchant of death, destined to lead anyone he comes into contact with to a gruesome fate.

Peter happened to be that person.

Tony remembered the first few days after the fight with the rogues, how he regretted taking Peter with him, knowing he was going to ruin the kid. The few months after had only solidified that claim, and so he’d taken the suit.

There was no way he was getting out of the situation now.

The poisoner- that son of a bitch tony was going to kill as soon as he could get out of this damn chair-

The poisoner, had strapped a mask to the teenager’s head, slowly screwing in a vial of that fucking liquid on either side.

And now he was breathing it in- the gas- the poison that Tony just sat there as he’d been strapped down.

Now, Tony thought it was bad enough when he’d had all those thoughts running through his head, memories of Peter before they’d gotten to know each other, before Tony had taken him in. He thought that had been bad enough.

But no, it was so much worse when all those thoughts suddenly screeched to a halt.

Because Peter had just turned his head, linking eyes with Tony, a desperate plea moving between them.

Because Peter was scared- he looked terrified.

There were unshed tears laying in his tear ducts, enough to easily see as you looked at the kid. His lips barely visible within the mask but from what Tony could see, they were held in a strained frown, lips being bitten.

Peter moved his head towards his mentor, linking eyes with the man. And that, right there in that moment, was when the teenager let go.

“T-tony-” A sob cut him off, choked out between his lips.

“T-tony please- i can’t- i don’t-” Tony shushed him from where he was sitting.

“Kid- Pete- I-” Tony was speechless, all known reassurances dying in his throat as soon as he’d thought of them, what were you supposed to say to a kid who was dying and you couldn’t do anything about it?

“Tony- please- dad- i can’t-” that kicked his instincts into gear.

“Kid, you need to stop talking, okay? The team’s going to get here soon, they’ll get this shit out of you and you’ll be okay, then you can tell me whatever you need to when you’re better, okay?”

Peter nodded, eyes still wide with tears but he listened to the billionaire. and somehow, that made it so much worse, the kid would follow him into fire if he asked him to, and now Tony got him into this situation.

Tony wanted nothing more than to look away from what was happening, as Peter breathed in the poison, helpless to do anything, but he couldn’t not be there for the kid. He needed his father figures comfort.

“he’s right, the teams gunna get here soon, i don’t know when but we’ll get you out of this as soon as we can, and then we can spend a week watching all of the star wars movies, and the clone wars if you want, anything you want kid”

The poisoner was sat in the corner of the room, on the other bed. He was watching them, watching Tony desperately give his kid comfort without being able to touch him.

Tony looked at him, “you’re a fucking psychopath, you know that, right? he’s 16, he’s just a kid. why don’t you kill me instead if you want me to pay so much, huh?”

The poisoner chuckled, standing up to walk over to them, “If you die, you wouldn’t feel the pain i did as my kid died in front of me, i’m going to make you watch as your kid suffocates in front of you”

He got two new vials, replacing the almost empty ones. Peter’s wheezing had gotten a lot more prominent now, trying desperately to bring in air.

Tony’s always been around death, it greets him at every corner. but every time, someone else dies instead of him, or at least, they come close to it.

He doesn’t know what he’d do if Peter dies.

______________

He’d already changed to the last set of vials now, Peter's breath was barely there.

Tony was fucking terrified, obviously.

The team was close, he was sure of it, but that had been what he’d been telling himself the whole time.

They were barely minutes out by his assumptions, but he didn’t know if Peter had minutes, vials nearly empty as the liquid in them turned to gas for the teenager to breathe in, slowly suffocating him.

He was still facing Tony, eve after this long, still trusting him to save him. Even as his body could barely pull in breaths, eyes drooping, they didnt stray from his face.

“Peter, you gotta keep your eyes open, i know it’s hard, i know- but you’ve gotta stay awake for just a few more minutes. We’re gunna help you, but you just gotta stay awake,”

Peter looked at him sadly, but his eyes stayed open and Tony counted that as a win. He started to say something but Tony shushed him quickly.

“It’s okay, kid. Don’t try to talk. We’ve been over this already, you can talk to me after the team gets here- star wars marathon and everything, remember?”

Peter’s eyebrows creased inwards, and Tony’s heart dropped. Either he just forgot about that whole part of their conversation or… or…

“You just gotta stay awake for me, okay? I believe in you kid, dont let me down,”

_______________

The door seemed to explode inwards when the team got there, Tony didn’t look up.

He didn’t look up as they arrested the poisoner, Bruce and sam moving to Peter, while two others moved to get Tony out of the seat he was in.

As soon as the handcuffs were undone, he surged forward, one hand reaching for the kid’s- which now rested on the bed after being released- and the other going to rest in his curls. Tony quickly wiped the tears off the kid’s face, staying away from his mouth as the others tried to give him as much oxygen as he needed.

Peter choked on a sob when he realised Tony was there, mouth slightly upturning even as another oxygen mask was placed over his face.

“I’m here kid. I’m so proud of you for staying awake, okay?” He looked to bruce, as the man looked away from Peter’s vitals, nodding to Tony now, “You can go to sleep now, I’m so proud of you kid, it’s okay,”

Peter’s eyes didn’t leave him, even as he fell asleep.

Tony cried as he was carried away.

__________________

Peter woke up in the medbay. That was his first sign that something bad happened.

The next sign was his mentor-father-figure-dad asleep on the side of his bed.

Peter’s eyes widened as he saw the tear tracks lining his cheeks. Tony never cried, not even when he dropped an engine on his foot that one time. If Tony was crying now, this- whatever it was that happened- it was bad bad.

“Tony?”

Tony startled awake, as if he meant to be on guard, and took one look at the kid in front of him before reaching for Peter and bringing him into his arms.

“Oh my fucking god, kid. Holy shit, you’re okay. Oh my god-”

“Tony what happened?” Was the teenager’s muffled answer, not complaining about being smothered in his da- Tony’s shirt.

“There was this- this guy we went after- had to go undercover and he got to us and he poisoned you, kid- and i couldn't- i couldn't do anything about it- i just sat there and you- you did so good-”

Peter shushed him as the memories arose in his mind, “Tony, can i talk for a second?” He received a nod in reply, “You called the team, Tony. I didn’t, you did. They got there in time and now I’m okay, aren’t I? You did everything that you could, if anything i should've done something, I’m the one with powers here. No- i know- i couldn’t have done anything but you were there the whole time telling me to stay awake and i did, Tony, because of you.”

Tony didn’t say anything, seemingly processing what the kid said. He looked up slowly, tears falling down his cheeks, leaning forward and pulling the kid into a hug again.

Slowly, Peter got tired, nearly falling asleep in Tony’s arms. So, of course, Tony moved into the bed with him, pulling the kid to rest his head against the man’s chest.

“I got you, kid, don’t worry. You can go to sleep,” Peter didn’t know if Tony was reassuring himself or the kid.

Stil, nonetheless, Peter seemingly couldn’t hold back from murmuring a last thought as he fell asleep.

“Love you, dad”

Tony froze for a moment before replying, “Yeah, i love you too, kid,”

#irondad #spiderson #peter parker #tony stark #friendly neighborhood exchange #whump #fluff #poison #nightmares #comfort #hurt/comfort #daniel writes

70 notes · View notes

hermit-pistol · 4 years ago

Text

Josuke Higashikata Fluff Alphabet:

Number 3/6 for the alphabet requests! Hope you enjoy! Click under the cut for more:

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Josuke is a very adventurous guy and he would love to be active and get out of the house with you! Whether it be exercising together or having an outdoor picnic, not a minute of daylight will be wasted.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

He is seriously envious of your style. Being pretty big on fashion himself, he's glad that he has an s/o that can match his taste. (Might even ask you to pick out his outfits for him one day, who knows)

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

He's no stranger to stress, and very much so understands the way that you're feeling. He'll wrap you into a big hug, repeating positive affirmations. It's imperative that he makes sure that you're feeling okay before he diverts attention from you.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Josuke is READY for those exciting next steps in your relationship. He often thinks about moving in together and getting a dog. He's really enthusiastic about the dog. You even catch him looking up dog breeds on his phone sometimes.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He has that "go with the flow" attitude, so it's no surprise that most of the decisions fall into your territory. It's not that he's lazy, he just trusts your judgment.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Being more bark than bite, he'll just get very loud very quickly. He won't stay mad for very long, but the man can hold a grudge for ages. Once you tell him you’re no longer angry he’ll probably follow suit.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

All throughout the day, Josuke will remind you how much you mean to him. Whether it be physical affection, saying sweet "I love you's" or buying you lunch just because, you just know that your boyfriend is as grateful as can be.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Josuke is a terrible liar. His face gets flushed and his breath gets caught in his throat. Besides that, he's pretty transparent and always tells the truth, whether he wants to or not.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Once Josuke met you, he finally got why everyone was ranting and raving about the whole "true love" thing. He showed you a new side to life, and he enjoys every day that he spends by your side. With you, he's also learned to become more confident in his appearance when his hair is down! He can afford to let his guard down around you.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

He'll get a little jealous when you spend time with his friends or Tomoko and don't check in with him from time to time. One time you were laughing with his mom over old baby pictures and Josuke had his arms crossed, pouting in the corner. He doesn't like to talk about it.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Naturally amazing kisser! He doesn't even need instructions or anything. If anything....he should be teaching you...(zoo wee mama)

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Josuke overthinks things and will be freaking out on the day that he finally decides to tell you how he feels. It would be over dinner, and when you found that your handsome man felt the same you were overjoyed. He would just sit there extremely proud of himself, grinning like a goofball for the rest of the meal.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Josuke totally proposes with the help of Okuyasu and Koichi and you can't change my mind. The three of them have been planning something big for weeks, and you can tell because they aren't slick. By the time that you and Josuke are alone, you can't help yourself and ask, "Hey, are you gonna propose already?". You can see the other two heavily breathing behind a tree and it's starting to freak you out.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

He frequently uses "babe". Like all the time. If he asks you for help or trying to get your attention, it's spoken literally every other sentence. It's endearing, though. Sometimes he'll also use a shortened version of your name!

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Josuke is like an excited puppy, and hiding his emotions is not something he's good at. Everyone in the town can tell that this pure love kinda guy is definitely feeling something strong. For heaven's sake, the man walks around Morioh in a trance.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

He's VERY handsy and cuddly and doesn't care who sees. If he could, he'd let the whole world know that you are his. Although, he'll be tasteful about it. For example, the citizens of the quaint town would rather not watch him shove his tongue down your throat.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

A random quirk? Josuke talks in his sleep all the time and says the best/ most random things. You tell him that one of these days you'll have to record him so he can hear it for himself. Most importantly, he mumbles your name in his sleep 🥺

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Again pure love kinda guy people. He's gonna be traditional, surprising you with flowers after work or treating you to dinner. He even pulls out chairs for you and the like. Josuke will always keep the romance alive.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

He's your biggest cheerleader, all that's missing is the outfit. No matter what you decide to go out and do he'll always have your back. Once you achieve your goal he'll pick you up and spin you around, saying how proud he is of you! (the dream, honestly)

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice up your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

It has been said that Josuke is the king of spontaneity. He's also quite keen on the element of surprise. One of his greatest endeavors was leaving plane tickets on the dining room table and not talking to you about it until you asked. He's too "young and wild" for a routine. Give him a few years to settle down.

U nderstanding - How well do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Josuke isn't afraid of his own feelings, so he's open for you to tell him about yours. He's extremely feeling and will listen to anything you have to tell him. He's your rock, basically, and you're so grateful that he's emotionally available for you.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

He puts his relationship at the top of his list of priorities. To him, it's even more special than video games. (that's saying a lot, here) Honestly, he wouldn't know what to do if you weren't around.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

You and Josuke have countless inside jokes and said jokes work their way into everyday life. It could either be a play on words or a funny voice; it doesn't take much for both of you to be curled up on the floor dying from laughter. He also seems like the kind of guy that makes random noises and laughs at them, don't deny it.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Josuke has declared it so he will always assume the position of the big spoon, and you accept these terms. He's also quite fond of kisses, giving or receiving. Surprise kisses are the best, in his opinion. Snipe him.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He knows that you have to spend time apart, but his thoughts drift to you quite often when the two of you aren't together. With friends, he'll zone out a lot, and maybe dramatically sigh. He'll also reread your best texting conversations often.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Josuke will put forth his best effort in the relationship, and you appreciate him for it. He doesn't really need to woo you with fancy objects or shiny things since you prefer his company anyways. You can't put a price on laughter anyways... (refer to W)

#WOO #man these are getting tough #so much info #Josuke Higashikata #josuke x reader #josuke higashikata x reader #jojos bizarre adventure #jojos bizzare adventure x reader #jojo #jjba #jojo heacanons #jjba headcanons #fluff alphabet #600 Follower Special

201 notes · View notes

tundrainafrica · 4 years ago

Text

Title: Bite

Summary: To say the least, Hange's last month of pregnancy turned out a little bumpier than what Levi would would have liked it to be.

A New Year's piece of Levihan Domestic Fluff. Happy New Year everyone!

Link to cross-postings: AO3

Notes: I know I've been writing a lot of fluff lately but yeah, just me coping with this being my first ever New Year's stuck at home with our family not together this year. Sorry for my French but Fuck Covid.

The house was quiet.

But that's how Levi wanted it. Hange was eight months pregnant after all. When she was carrying a fragile growing mini person inside her, he would rather she stayed quiet anyway. The peace and calm of the household was an improvement from the clack of rock to wood and her humming. It was a sign at least that Hange was finally getting the well needed rest that came with carrying an extra human.

But it was just a little too quiet. Too quiet for it to ever be comfortable for Levi. Levi had to note that it was past noon and Hange should have been up, playing around with whatever rocks she had on the workbench or at least sitting on the sofa reading a random book from the bookshelf in the dining room.

She probably stayed up late last night. Levi thought to himself. That thought was quickly shot down when Levi recalled that she had actually slept much earlier than him.

Of course, she's eight months pregnant. Levi attempted to scramble for other reasons for that silence as he started to give in to the nagging worry. When Hange was home, she was always making noise. Levi found it almost eerie that the noise levels were down to when Hange was out for work. All he could hear were the clatter of pans as he placed them on the sink and the simmer of the fire as he started to prepare lunch.

After I finish making lunch I'll check on her. Levi promised himself.

Levi had been up since five and had not entered the room again since then. It was for good reason. Hanger was notably crankier than usual, particularly in the mornings. Carrying an extra human to term had her having rough days every day and Levi just wanted to be a little more careful with his cards.

He turned on the radio by the kitchen window. Having an extra voice at least even if it wasn't Hange worked to alleviate some of that discomfort. He had started on reorganizing one of the cupboards when the radio whirred to life.

Hearing the man on the radio was oddly comforting. He never did leave the house as often as Hange so the radio had been his anchor to real life. With Hange home more often, he never needed to turn it on, Hange always had her own personal talkshow going on when she wasn’t asleep. Either that or he was too busy worrying about her to even have time to focus on the happenings that day.

For the first time in so long, he had the time. Enjoy it while you can. Levi told himself as he started to ponder what the news of the day would be. Having lived a long life constantly being chased in the underground that eventually evolved into a life killing man eaten giants, Levi found listening to the societal problems that plagued Paradis almost calming.

He had been dubbed ‘humanity’s strongest soldier’ and had been fighting man eating beasts and preventing the fall of humanity for a huge part of his life. Yet at present, most problems that made their way to Paradis were at least solvable by the average conscripted soldier or the average office worker. More than half the time, no one was actually in danger of dying. A significant improvement from the Paradis he grew up in.

Listening to the happenings on the radio, he was reminded of the joys of retirement. He indulged himself by listening to the last few parts of a radio drama and news on preparations for the fireworks festival that night.

The world is so peaceful. Levi had been daring enough to think that statement to himself.

“Breaking news!” It was as if the radio had sentience and read his mind, wanting to prove Levi wrong as if to say ‘the world will never be completely peaceful.’ “We just received word of a hostage situation in one of the warehouses in the Southern port.”

A wave of panic ended up running through him. It could have been from the tone of the reporter or Levi’s own instincts. Calm down. You’re not a soldier anymore. This isn’t your problem. It wasn’t at all new for Levi to react like that internally. He had an unnaturally strong sense of urgency having lived a life of danger for too long. He willfully brushed it off and attempted to focus instead on cutting the vegetables for the soup he was making for lunch.

“More information is coming in…”

Having spent most of his days alone in the house with nothing but a radio for a companion, Levi had mastered the art of multitasking, being able to pick up all the details of the radio article over the sound of the pots and pans, the sound of plates being stacked or the whistle of the kettle.

A gang car jacked one of the buses on the way out of the Southern port.

Gang holds hostage in the port fireworks which were slated to be sent to the capital for Paradis’ first ever New Years Celebration...

The fireworks were ordered more than a year ago…

Levi knew enough at least to understand what would have pushed people to steal them. Hange had mentioned it once during one of her rambles. She had been the one who had suggested they buy fireworks from Marley and celebrate New Years more than a year ago. It was apparently a highly anticipated festivity every year in Marley and having been so excited at the idea of celebrating it in Paradis, Hange went overboard with the organization. They had sent people to Marley to train with handling fireworks and had gone over multiple displays before deciding on one, which ended up being one of the more expensive options.

But it will be beautiful. Those words echoed once again in Levi’s head. He recalled seeing stars in her eyes as she said it.

Eventually Armin had taken over and with Hange’s hand out of the project, Levi had forgotten about it until he heard the details of the hostage situation over the radio. I wonder what Armin’s doing about it. A food for thought he reflected on while he prepared the ingredients for boiling.

“The police are assessing the situation as we speak.” Levi was aware they couldn’t give the exact details, the hostage takers could be listening in.

Another report came in a few seconds later. "The escaped hostages have confirmed the hostage takers do not have a radio on site. No chance of them listening in."

Levi found himself silently commending the escaped hostages for noting such a small detail. He hadn’t expected civilians to be that sharp especially in such a stressful situation.

“We escaped through the vents with one brave woman’s help but she had to stay behind.”

“How many are left inside the warehouse?”

“Just her.”

“Couldn’t she escape with you?”

“No sir. She doesn’t fit.”

“Doesn’t fit?"

“She looked like she was at least eight months pregnant.”

A pregnant woman in a hostage situation? Levi’s ears perked up at that. His thoughts flew to whoever that woman’s poor husband could have been. He had his own pregnant wife after all so he was quick to sympathize. Despite not believing in a god, he found himself sending prayers to that phantom husband. I hope someone at least informed him.

Levi kept his attention on the radio news as he mixed the ingredients and the spices for the soup.

“We have to get her out soon then.”

“She said she’d be fine. She even called the hostage takers amateurs.”

Levi was familiar with hostage situations though to know it was in their interest to keep their hostages alive. When taking the risk though, losing meant losing a life and Levi found himself sympathizing with whoever was left. Maybe I should call Armin? After I wake up Hange.

“But she could end up dead.”

“She said they wouldn’t.. On the off chance they did, she could defend herself.” Despite having just come out of a hostage situation and seeming concerned about a pregnant companion they had left behind, the woman talking on the radio seemed convinced that the pregnant woman could take care of herself.

How can an eight month pregnant woman defend herself though? Levi was starting to get a little more interested in the identity of the pregnant woman. There were two possibilities, she was a pregnant woman with a screw loose in her brain or she was an actual genius, Maybe he could ask Hange to ask Armin about it and they could learn a thing or two from her.

“She used to be in the military… And apparently had dealt with worse situations before."

So she was from the military? The military was a small community and Levi was sure he should know who it was. Was anyone pregnant though… Other than Hange?

Levi had racked his brain for a few seconds considering all the possibilities. Except one.

He did not know how many minutes he had spent considering the other possibilities before moving on to the exception. Yet that possibility was just outrageous. So outrageous that Levi had to ask Hange even if it meant waking her up from her nap.

Sorry for interrupting your sleep Hange, I just heard about an eight month pregnant woman who used to be part of the military and got taken hostage in a warehouse by the port. Just wanted to make sure it wasn’t you. Levi rehearsed his lines quickly as he made his way to the bedroom. It sounded ridiculous the second time he repeated it to himself. At that point though, it seemed worth it.

Levi’s heart started to beat faster as he entered the room, he could almost hear it. It could have been from the fear of waking up that lump on the other side of the bed or the fear of finding out it was just a pillow.

He never found out where that fear came from. It turned out the pillow was just a lump. Before Levi could even process his bodies’ reaction to the suspense and that harsh realization, his body went into survival mode. It came as a torrent of unintelligible emotions reminiscent of his fights against the beast titan and the invasion of Marley.

Just like it did then, his survival mode switched on and his instincts took over. Levi’s body was moving much faster than his brain. He called a taxi to take him to the port.

It was an option ten times more expensive than the shuttle but the price was the last thing on his mind.

Bite

The crowds on the port were large and Levi was disappointed to find out that many of the people there were uniformed policemen. He pushed his way through the crowd clutching one of the men in the front by their collar. “Why the hell are you not moving? You probably outnumber the hostage takers at this rate!”

“But sir… we don’t have orders. And there’s one more civilian inside.” The uniformed policeman who had answered Levi seemed a little too unsure and inexperienced that just listening to him made Levi miss his comrades in the survey corps all the more. That man looked like he had never fought in his life.

“Fuck this, I’m going in.”

“Sir are you sure? I think those men inside are armed with some very high end guns. We can never be too careful.”

Armed with what? Levi had been pitted against guns, thunder spears, man-eating giants and the king of all these founding titans. Despite the big ham the policeman was making those weapons out to be, Levi was not nervous at all.

He ran towards the building and in that few seconds vacillated between breaking through the window and bursting through the door. He had to act fast. Behind him, he could hear soldiers and policemen screaming at him to stay back and if he allowed himself a brief moment to stop and consider the situation, they might actually catch up.

Levi took a glance at one of the windows as he ran. The guns were on the table. Their guard was down. Levi found himself all the more disappointment at the policemen as he did. How the fuck is anybody not noticing that.

He crashed through the window where he had seen the guns on the table.

He never gave them time to pick up the guns. Even during that small moment Levi had allowed them as he took stock of the situation, they did not even attempt to dive for a weapon.

Levi and Hange did not have many things that could have served as a weapon in the house. Having only allowed himself a few seconds to get ready, Levi used the time to turn off the stove and cover the pot he had used to cook the soup. The only thing that he had managed to grab then was the vegetable knife that sat on the board he had used to cut vegetables that morning.

Levi though had worked with knives for years. He had also mastered the art of looking menacing even with the most mundane household objects as weapons. Even if he didn’t look menacing and the five hostage takers weren’t frozen on the spot, Levi was sure he still had enough agility left inside him to slit all their throats before they could shoot the gun. Preserving life had always been part of his principles though and he found himself giving the men the luxury to talk.

“Please! Don’t kill us!” One of the men begged as he fell to his knees. The others soon followed suit.

“You take hostages and you expect us not to attack?”

“We just needed money. Just give us money for the fireworks and we’ll be off your backs.” The first man who had kneeled explained. He looked to be their leader.

Levi kept his eye on the weapons on the table as he listened to the men. “This is a crime. I should be turning you in.” He had expected that to at least provoke the men. Alas, he had expected too much from them. All they did was kneel on the floor in defeat, their eyes downcast.

He approached the guns on the table and he could hear the men whimper as he did.

“The guns are broken,” one man said nervously. “We couldn’t get them to shoot.”

Of course you won’t get them to shoot. They need to be loaded first. Levi knew those guns too well. They were the guns Kenny and his police used after all. He had been at the end of that muzzle enough times to last a lifetime.

These hostage takers are amateurs. Levi had to admit, Hange probably would have been fine in this situation even if he didn’t show up.

“Where are your hostages?” Levi did not need to focus on the guns. Even if the men dove for them, Levi was sure they wouldn’t be able to shoot them.

Levi heard a kick behind him and one of the men nervously made his way beside Levi. “Over here… er sir.”

He was led to a dark room at the end of the hall. He kicked the door open, not bothering to wait for the man next to him to get the key.

The door opened to a room with many empty chairs lined up, one of them occupied by someone, someone Levi recognized almost instantly by the large belly and the fact that he had been seeing that face everyday for the past five years of his life.

Hange was there, sitting on a chair her hands tied behind her. As she looked up at them, Levi could see she had a face of overexaggerated terror for a while. For that split second, she was faking it. Levi had known her enough to know that. Within that second, it had twisted into something else, guilt and possibly actual terror.

“Levi… it’s nice to see you here,” She said. Levi had been with her enough to see that was the terror she exuded when she knew she had done something wrong.

“Why are you here? Aren’t you supposed to be at home?” Levi kept his voice cool, calm, feigning an expression of fake surprise. He was sure Hange would see through it. In fact, he wanted her to see through it.

“I would have been home by noon.”

“Answer the fucking question.”

Hange avoided his gaze. “The fireworks. I wanted to make sure they got to the capital safely.”

“You are an eight month pregnant woman on fucking leave. Why the fuck can’t you leave this to Armin.” He asked in the form of a statement. A statement he very much wanted her to reflect on.

“Armin and Mikasa are on a business trip to Marley. Besides, these are the expensive fireworks I ordered,” Hange explained. A shitty explanation which Levi refused to buy.

“The expensive fireworks Paradis ordered. We’re going home.” He approached Hange, ready to cut up the ropes behind her only to see there was nothing tying her to the chair. Of course. The others had gotten away. And the only person who could have helped them was Hange.

He noticed their means of escape in the form of a vent. It was closed yet, somehow Levi could tell it had been disturbed by its relative cleanliness when compared to the room that was covered in a layer of dust.

For a second, he had considered going out through there. The layer of dust and the large belly of Hange only made it a not too appealing option. “We’re going out through the front door and----”

And we’re leaving the rest to the police. They should be competent enough to arrest them at least. Levi would have wanted to say. That was until he heard the sound of gunshots.

Not the gunshots from the old military police guns. Those are the police guns.

“We surrender!”

The next thing he heard was an explosion then unfamiliar pops.

“The fireworks!” It was Hange who had answered that question of what that popping was. From seeing her crestfallen face, Levi was sure she had not intended to answer his question.

“We’re going out through the vent then.” He pulled Hange from her seat, making a silent apology to the baby inside her. “Can you hold your stomach in?” A dumb question to ask his pregnant wife but Levi was desperate.

It turned out though she didn’t need to squeeze her way through. The vent had been big enough for her to fit through without having to hold her stomach in.

And Hange should have known that. Hange wasn’t an idiot. In fact, Levi was sure she had better spatial reasoning skills than him, seeing as she had been in charge of the recent infrastructural developments over the years.

When he had carried her far away enough from the fire and the consequent blast, he had started to understand why she had been so adamant not to leave in the first place.

“The fireworks!” Hange was kneeling on the grass, a safe distance away from the blast and sobbing. “We paid so much for this Levi… This was supposed to be our first New Years celebration…” The intelligible words devolved into babble and Levi wondered whether that kind of emotional stress would be good for the baby.

At least, the hostage takers had gotten out safely. Levi thought, a desperate attempt to see light in the situation.

Bite

“So let me get this straight. You stayed behind on purpose?” It had been a good few hours since the incident and it still took Levi some effort to talk to her calmly. Levi understood at least that he had a duty not to cause her any more stress especially right after what had happened.

She had shut herself in the room for a good hour or so as soon as they had gotten back. Levi had made sure to check on her a few times since then since she was almost as quiet as that pillow that had pretended to be Hange that morning. By evening, her face was still red and her eyes swollen.

To Levi’s relief, she had replied, a significant improvement from her catatonic state. “We were looking forward to some grand festivities and those fireworks were expensive.…” Hange mentioned the cost of the fireworks and Levi was sure that amount was the fund of the survey corps for one year.

With the price of the fireworks, he was somehow starting to sympathize at least. “You sure we don’t need to go to the hospital?” He asked, his voice a little gentler.

“No, it’s okay I’m fine.”

Levi did believe her. She had little to no scratches on her and she was still walking normally at least. It was her almost catatonic state which troubled him. He could give that until the next day. “We still have next year for fireworks,” he said, an attempt to comfort her.

A moment later, he started to hear the familiar popping. “Is that fireworks? I thought they got destroyed?”

“Yeah, those are the normal fireworks. The ones I wanted to see were the expensive ones I ordered last year.”

So we had fireworks already? Levi found himself moving to the kitchen mechanically, with the one goal of making himself a cup of tea. If he allowed himself any emotion then, he probably could have strangled Hange at that moment. “If you wanna see the fireworks, you can go down.” Just another precaution, he set for himself so at least he was a safe distance from her

The kitchen was near the window and although they were in one of the upper floors, he should be able to hear Hange’s footsteps as long as the windows were open and he concentrated enough.

The tea was calming and it kept him more alert to Hange’s footsteps. Just in case she did something else stupid. He wasn’t at all feeling trusting that particular night.

He had expected to hear footsteps, leather on wood or cement. For a few minutes, that was what he was hearing.

A few minutes later, he heard something he hadn’t expected to hear at all. In fact it was something he probably wouldn’t have had to listen closely to hear.

A loud squeak then a surprised scream from Hange.

Bite

The last place Levi would have expected to spend New Years was in the hospital.

He had expected Hange to have done things during her pregnancy which would have ended up with a hospital visit. Never in his life would he have thought that it would have been from a rat bite and it would have been eight months into her pregnancy during New Years day.

“I tried to sit on the dumpster because it had the best view and there was a rat there...” Hange explained to the doctor from her bed in the emergency room.

Levi had stayed silent as Hange went into detail. He tried to tune it out himself, knowing ‘bitten by a rat’ was all he needed to hear for his whole body to shudder. Being drenched in titan’s blood seemed like a better alternative.

“I recommend you stay overnight. We’re uhh… going to have to talk to some doctors in Marley about this. I don’t think we’ve ever had a case of a woman getting bitten by a rat in her third term. We’ll have the nurse set you up with a room.” With that, the doctor left and it was just Hange and Levi together in that little corner of the emergency room.

Hange lay back on the hospital bed, her belly making a giant hill on top of her. It was so unnaturally large that Levi realized he wouldn’t be too surprised if the baby came out at any moment.

“You know Levi, I think he enjoyed today. He was kicking my belly back in the warehouse,” Hange quipped playfully as she rubbed her belly. Levi noted that the line that connected to Hange’s hand must have been some sort of painkiller or sleep drought. Hange’s smiling face was a brief respite from her crying face that afternoon, even if it was medicine-induced.

“Or maybe he thought you were a complete idiot.”

“You know… When I heard the window crash, the baby kicked harder… I think he knew daddy was coming to save us.”

“Or maybe he knew mommy didn’t need saving after all.” Levi returned her playful smile with a glare.

“Hey, you had fun. It was just like the old days...”

Fun? Levi wouldn’t have used that word at all. Getting shot at and being almost eaten on a regular basis wasn’t fun. Not knowing when you would die wasn’t fun. As Hange had mentioned the word ‘old days,’ Levi did start to realize he had been a little disappointed to see the men hadn’t shot at him.

He put a hand to his forehead. “Do I actually miss fighting?” He pressed harder into his forehead as if that action was enough to push some sanity back into his brain. No one should be missing a war. “Hey Hange, do you miss it?” He wanted to search for some assurance at least that he wasn’t the only one slightly insane.

He looked back at Hange to see the latter had dozed off, her face fixed into a warm comfortable smile, her hand resting on her belly.

He didn’t know how long he had been staring. It could have been minutes or hours. His trance though had been broken by one greeting of “Happy New Year!” then a few soft cheers and some light clapping. Levi wasn’t too worried that Hange would wake up. She looked to be in a deep sleep.

Levi put his hand on hers, and even with one hand beneath his and the belly, he still felt it, a light small kick. He’s coming out soon.

He leaned close to her ear, taking in the rare sounds of her relaxed breathing before he whispered his own greeting. “Happy New Year… Next year we’ll see the fireworks together, all three of us.”

It was a promise only he would have remembered. But it was a promise he vowed to keep.

#levihan #levi ackerman #hange zoe #levi x hange #fanfic

71 notes · View notes

catlynhoss05 · 4 years ago

Text

How Far We’ve Come Ch. 2

Tony DiNozzo x sister!reader Jethro x reader

Summary: (Y/n) gets home from deployment and surprises her older brother, Tony DiNozzo. What she didn’t expect was to fall head over heels in love with Leroy Jethro Gibbs. (You guys remember in season 14 where Alex Quinn and Nick Torres’s desks were facing each other? That’s how (Y/N) and McGee’s desks are.)

(Y/N) sighed, running her hand through her short platinum blonde hair as she leaned back in her chair. She was set up at a temporary desk while things got figured out. She was now doing all the required paperwork that needed to be done for her to become an agent. ‘Man, this is taking forever.’ She thought to herself as she continues working on her paperwork. (Y/N) didn’t expect the paperwork to take this long and required so much reading. “Hey, sis. How’s the paperwork going?” Tony asked as he leaned up against his desk. “It’s taking forever, Tony. I honestly did not expect this much paperwork. I just want to be done with it.” (Y/N) groaned, resting her head in her hands. “At least you have two more papers to do. It’ll be worth it, I promise.” Tony said, giving her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Thanks, Tony.” (Y/N) gives him a half smile.

When (Y/N) had finished her paperwork and gave it to HR, it was about 2 o’clock in the afternoon. As (Y/N) walked back into the bullpen, she wasn’t so sure on what she was supposed to do now. So, she had decided to go sit down at her desk that was next to Tim’s. “Hey, (Y/N).” Ziva called out from her desk. “Yeah, what’s up?” (Y/N) asked. “Has Tony always been so...?” “Tony? Yes, he has. Oh, the stories I could tell you about our childhood.” (Y/N) chuckles. “Those’ll have to wait, (Y/N). Got a dead Lieutenant. Grab your gear.” Gibbs says as he walks into the bullpen and to his desk. “Me too, Gibbs?” (Y/N) asked, standing up from her desk. “Yes, you too. And, here’s your badge and gun...... Probie.” Gibbs gives his signature smile as he hands her her stuff. He turns on his heel, making his way to the elevator where the other three agents are waiting. (Y/N) smiles and grabs her new NCIS jacket off the back of her chair and hurries to the elevator with the rest of the team.

Once the team arrived to the crime scene, (Y/N) notices that the crime scene was in an alley way next to a country line dance type of bar. “Man, I love me a good line dance.” She said as she walked up to Gibbs. “You like line dancing?” Gibbs asked, smiling. “Yes, sir. I have soft spot for everything country. Especially line dancing and old western movies. So, what-” (Y/N) was interrupted by an excited McGee. “Boss, you’ve got to hear (Y/N) sing. She is amazing.” McGee said excitedly. “Look, I was in the back of the van and the song ‘My Maria’ by Brooks and Dunn had come on and I just couldn’t resist to NOT sing along. Can we please get to work now?” (Y/N) blushes. “I like that idea. (Y/N), do crime scene photos. Ziva, bag and tag. DiNozzo and McGee, get witness statements.” Gibbs barks out.

“Hey, (Y/n). You should tell Gibbs about those home movies that we’ve made.” Tony chuckled. “Just get to work, Anthony. I’m a Sniper and I will end you.” (Y/n) said, starting to take the crime scene photos. “What do we have, Duck?” Gibbs asked as he crouched beside Ducky. “Well Jethro, looks like he was beaten with a hollow object. I do believe that either this blow to the head or this needle mark on his neck had killed our Lieutenant. I’ll know more when I get him back to autopsy.” Ducky explains. Gibbs stands up from where he was crouched down at when he sees Tony and McGee were walking back over to the scene.

“What did you guys find out from the witnesses?” Gibbs asked. “They all pretty much said the same thing. They all saw Lieutenant Andrews having some drinks with some buddies for a few hours, but didn’t see the Lieutenant leave. That was all that they remembered.” McGee explained. “There was one guy though, Alan Michaels. He said he saw a man about 5′8″, red hair, medium build, follow Lieutenant Andrews out of the bar last night.” Tony said. "Did you get his number just in case we may need him, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked. "Yes, boss."

Once (Y/n) was done taking the crime scene photos, she was making her way over to Gibbs, McGee and Tony when a truck's exhaust backfires. The sound of the exhaust backfiring triggers a bit of (Y/n)'s PTSD that she didn't know that she had. The noise makes her drop to her knees and covers her ears with her hands while she still had the camera strap hanging from her neck. Tony and McGee take notice of (Y/n)'s actions when she goes down to her knees and run over to her. "Hey, hey, hey. (Y/n), it's okay. You're okay. Just breathe." Tony says to her as he's on his knees in front of her.

Gibbs ran over to the commotion to see if he could be of any help. "N-No..... Make it stop. M-Make it stop, please." (Y/n) begged. "(Y/n), it's okay. It's over; it's all over. It was just a truck exhaust that backfired." Tony soothed as he pulled (Y/n) into a hug. After a few minutes of hugging, she spoke up. "I think I'm good now, Tony. Thank you." Tony pulled away and helped his sister up off of the ground. "No problem. But, are you sure that you're okay?" He asked. "Yes, Tony. I'm okay and I'm sorry if I had scared you guys. I never had that happen before." She said as she looked at McGee and Gibbs. "It's okay, (y/n). We're just glad that you're okay." McGee reassured her. She gave him a shy smile in return. "I've been home now for two weeks and not returning back to home base anymore is something I still haven't gotten use to. But the hard part of being home was having to bury two of my Marine brothers." (Y/n) explained to the agents. Gibbs knew all to well how that was like when he had gone through the same thing and then some. "Anyway....." (Y/n) sighed. "I was actually just coming over to tell you, Gibbs, that I'm done with the crime scene photos. Oh, and that Ducky and Palmer are done as well and are actually loaded up and ready to go." (Y/n) explained. "Alright. (Y/n), you ride with me this time and the you two and Ziva take the van." "Yes, sir." (Y/n) gave McGee the camera and started to follow Gibbs back to the squad car.

The car ride back to the office had started out pretty quiet between Gibbs and (y/n). "So, does Vance know about your fallen brothers?" Gibbs asked as he glanced over at her. "Yes, he does. That's why I didn't come back into the office to start filling out the rest of my paperwork right away. I, uh...... Had to bury one of my brothers the other week and then my other brother last week with some time in between to cope with the losses." (Y/n) rubbed her face and sighed. "Do you mind if I turn on the radio?" She asked. "It doesn't work." Gibbs chuckled, earning a smirk from (y/n). Gibbs had started developing feelings for the young agent since the moment they met. He had a suspicious feeling that she had the same feelings for him by the lingering looks and the way she occasionally looked away when they made eye contact.

“So, what are these home movies that Tony was talking about?” Gibbs asked with a chuckle. (Y/n) groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose. “When I decided that I was going to enlist in the Core, it was like two weeks before I graduated high school. Tony and I had made this promise with each other....” She trailed off. “We made this promise that before I left for boot camp and for whenever I came home on leave, we would make as many home movies as we could before I had to leave again.” (Y/n) explained with a smile as she recalled the memories. “What were the movies about?” Gibbs asked curiously.

“We played the piano and sang random songs together for some of them. Then there were some where either Tony or myself played the piano while singing as the other would make up some random dance behind the other. And then the rest were just of us in the kitchen acting like we were professional chefs and making complete fools of ourselves.” She laughed as she described the home movies. Gibbs smiled and laughed along with her as he pulled into the parking lot and parked the car. Gibbs and (y/n) made their way back into the NCIS building. They were in the elevator back up to the bullpen when (y/n) spoke up. “I’m sorry if I had scared you at the crime scene today. That’s never happened before and I’m pretty sure it’s from what I experienced in the Core.” (Y/n) apologized.

“It’s alright. I’m just glad that you’re okay.” Gibbs said, giving her a reassuring smile. “Oh, I almost forgot. Do you have any plans this weekend? Because, I need some help with the moving truck and getting everything into my apartment. I’ll even order us some take out. What do you say, Gibbs?” (Y/n) asked. “Of course I’ll help. I can bring the beverages. Beer or Bourbon?” He asked. “Uh, duh. Bourbon!” “Deal.” Gibbs chuckled. He loved the way she smiled at him and the way she looked at him with a sparkle in those big brown eyes of hers. “Thanks, Gibbs. I’m just glad that I made a deal with my landlord. And that I have a pretty awesome boss too.” (Y/n) chuckled, lightly bumping shoulders with Gibbs.

When everyone on team Gibbs had gotten back to the office, it had been a couple of hours or so and every lead that had came through was a dead end. Until (y/n) came across Lieutenant Skylar Andrews’ phone records. “Found something.” She spoke up as she did some more digging on the phone records. “What did you find, (y/n)?” Gibbs asked, coming over to her desk. “I think that the Lieutenant was gay.” She said, looking up at Gibbs. “You think?” He quirked an eyebrow at her. She raised her eyebrows at him and leaned back in her chair. “May I continue or do you wanna do this instead?” She challenged. Gibbs chuckled and shook his head. “Go on.”

(Y/n) smirked and sat back up. “Well, the Lieutenant had made a lot of calls and had messaged the same number for the last two years. I’ve gone through and read some of the very detailed messages to where I came to know that he, in fact, was gay. He was calling and messaging his boyfriend of two years.” (Y/n) explained. “And how do you know for sure that he was gay and contacting his boyfriend?” Tony asked. “The messages were very detailed and by very detailed, I mean there were VERY graphic photos too.” She explained again. “If that’s the case, then how do we catch our guy?” Tim asked. “You can send two of us into the bar acting as a gay military couple to lure the man out. Then we can catch him there.” (Y/n) said to Gibbs and waited as he thought about it for a minute.

“Ziver. You and (y/n) go into the bar tonight as a couple But, what’s our game plan here?” Gibbs asked. “Do you know how to line dance, Ziva?” (Y/n) asked. “Yes, but I haven’t been line dancing in a few years.” Ziva answered. “Okay. C’mon, David. We gotta practice line dancing before tonight. Oh, and Gibbs. What uniform should I wear?” (Y/n) asked. “Wear your fatigues.” “Got it, boss. And, Tony. I got a hotter girlfriend than you do.” (Y/n) joked.

#jethro gibbs #tony dinozzo #ncis fandom #jethro gibbs x reader

53 notes · View notes

castielific · 4 years ago

Text

The list

AO3 Link

Tags: Supernatural, Destiel, Alternate Ending, Canon Compliant (up to 15x10), Human!Castiel, First kiss Summary:

Once there are no more monsters, the only thing left to fight for is happiness.

Here is my take on our boys’ happy ending. I hope you’ll enjoy it.

**************************

"I hate you", Dean grumbles into his elbows. His arms are on the table, his head buried into it as he squeezes his hands over his ears.

"I think he’s getting better," Sam lies, hiding his grimace just in time so that Dean doesn’t see it when he raises his head to glare at him.

Dean opens his mouth, but is cut off by a particularly shrill note that makes him feel like someone is drilling right into his tympans. Even Sam can't help but squeeze his fists in pain, crumbling the edge of the book he's trying to read.

"'This would be good for you, Castiel'," Dean says, imitating Sam. "What about us, Sam? This doesn't feel good for us!"

"It's not so bad," Sam offers miserably.

Yes it is. It's even worse than bad. Dean flinches in pain at every horrible noise that resounds all around the bunker as Cas continues to play - or more like, tries to play - what Dean thinks is supposed to be 'Twinkle twinkle little star' on his newly acquired violin.

Truth is, it is all Sam's fault. Dean can't ressent him that much though, because the look on Castiel's face when they went to the music store was worth the torture they've been enduring for the last two days.

Since God has been defeated, they've all been having a serious case of cabin fever. Heaven and Hell have closed up their doors, angels and demons alike running home with their tails between their legs. Even the common monsters have gone into hiding. Apparently the Winchesters killing God has impressed them enough that they've all decided that they better keep quiet. Of course, they're still there, but smart enough not to do anything that might attract the wrath of the hunters. Apparently, they are exceptionally good at hiding when they want to because the only case the brothers have had in the last six months had been a rogue vampire that went on a rampage. He was still young and out of control. It took three hours to take him down, the whole deal was done in less than a day, even counting the drive.

In short, hunting has become boring. All they've had to keep them busy have been some random salt and burn, nothing exciting. The rest of the time, they've stayed cooped up in the Bunker and it didn't take long for them to go crazy. Each in their own personal way.

For his part, Sam has gone a little too far on his healthy lifestyle penchant, to the point that it became borderline unhealthy: Running up to three hours a day and eating nothing but vegetable smoothies. It lasted two months before he realized that all it was doing was giving him diarrhea and making his shins look like basketball. So now he's taken to digitizing and translating every book in their library….which sounds as exciting as getting all your teeth pulled out, if you were to ask Dean, but at least it passes the time.

Dean's way of coping was on the polar opposite as his brother's: he decided it was as good a time as any to learn to cook better. Dean has always loved cooking and has been having a blast since they found the bunker. For the first time of his life, he has a home and a kitchen of his own. Until now, between the Amara, the Men of Letters, and all that crap with God, he never had time to really enjoy it, limiting himself to the few recipes he already knew: burgers, steak, and breakfast food. With the hunting gig slowing down though, he had all the time in the world to try his hand at more ambitious things like roast, chili, lasagna and way too many pies.

His personal wake up call came when he tried to put on clothes one morning and couldn't find any pants that fitted him anymore.They hadn't had a case for three weeks, and he had to admit that he became a little too familiar with sweatpants. When confronted with the terrible truth of his every single one of his jeans being suddenly too small, he had no other choice: he spent the whole day dismantling the dryer to find out why it was shrinking all his clothes. Sam had a blast mocking him and Castiel, with his usual discretion, was quite pointedly avoiding looking at Dean's stomach during that conversation. Dean spent a long time in front of the mirror after that. He regrettably had to admit that his stomach resembled more Father Christmas's belly than David Beckham's abs at this point. He started to follow Sam's health routine the very next day. Or, tried to, at least. It didn't last long before he couldn't take the smoothie torture anymore, and decided that limiting his pie intake to two per week and doing some exercise should be enough.

Sam and him actually came to an agreement on food after that, and while Dean would never ever drink a kale smoothie again, it actually wasn't so bad to add a little more salad to his plate.

All in all, it was a difficult time for everyone, but especially for Castiel.

Castiel used to be an angel with a Godly purpose, a mission grander than anything people could even imagine. Then suddenly Chuck was gone, and the angels were gone too, and he just became a puny human with no real purpose, a soldier of God with no God to serve and no war to fight. Easy to say that he quickly joined Dean in his sweatpants' aficionados club. Except where Dean was happy to indulge in a laziness that he never really had a chance to try out before, Cas soon fell into depression. Even the best pies Dean made seemed tasteless to him after a time. He was lost in a human routine that he could find no pleasure in. It came to a point where he didn't even sleep in his own bed anymore, never leaving the couch except to satisfy the most basic needs. Sadly, on most days, showers didn't seem to be considered as one of those needs.

Once they had their breakthrough about their own miserable situations, the Winchesters decided to tackle their new mission: helping Cas.

It was Sam who proposed that they should all write a list of things they always wanted to do, but never had time for.

They took a trip to the Grand Canyon on the very next day, dragging a reticent Castiel along. Their road trip lasted nearly a month, because they kept getting distracted by new destinations. Sam wanted to see the Harold Washington Library, Dean wanted to go to Baltimore to go to the Dangerously Delicious Pies shop he heard about while searching for new pies recipes, and so on.

Castiel never asked to see anything, pretending gloomily that he used to be able to go anywhere in a flap of his wings, and therefore had seen everything he ever wanted too. Dean dragged him to an amusement park anyway, because he was pretty sure the angel had never been on a rollercoaster before. Dean regretted that pretty fast when Cas became strangely fond of them, saying that it reminded him of flying. They took so many rides that Dean threw up and Sam's nose bled for nearly one hour after.

Still, it seemed like a wake up call for Cas. He spent the rest of the drive home lost in his thoughts or scribbling a list on the back of a gas station's receipt. He even asked them to stop in Utah on the way back to see the largest bee hives in the US. They ended up buying so many types of honey that they now have a cupboard full of it in the kitchen.

They had been back to the bunker for two days when Cas declared he wanted to learn how to play an instrument. They went to a music store, where Castiel tried on every instrument from a harmonica to a full drum set. After the obligatory harps jokes, Dean tries to entice him to buy a guitar, and learn all the best Zep songs. Cas was too polite and knew better than to criticize Dean's taste in music, so he chose the guitar. Dean wasn't oblivious to the way his friend kept lingering in front of a black violin though, so he relented and bought that instead.

He's sorely regretting it now.

It's still totally Sam's fault though, he was the one to come up with the idea of this stupid list in the first place.

**********************

"I've decided what I want," Castiel declares as soon as the movie's credit starts rolling about a month later.

Sam snorts, waking up from the doze he'd fallen into. He blinks at them, wiping his eyes tiredly.

"I said no cat, Cas," Dean reminds. Apparently, one of Cas' item on his stupid list is to get a pet.

"I don't want a cat."

"I'm allergic to animal's hair," Dean reminds him, suspicious. Last night Cas declared he wanted a Camel. A freaking camel.

"Of course, Dean, your health comes first," Cas concedes amicably. "Although, I do wonder if you're not using this as an excuse, and would not have been amenable to adopt a pet anyway, were it not the case."

Dean scratches under his ear. "What? No. Of course, I'd want one. I love animals. Just, no snakes or anything that eats living food. I know you, and you would just end up saving all the mice or something."

"You know, they do make hairless cats and dogs," Sam pipes up, smirking when Dean sends him a side glare.

"Those are majestic creatures, indeed, Sam, but I much prefer the softness of fur. Don't you Dean?"

"What." What kind of question is that?

"Wouldn't you like it if you could have a pet with a soft fur that didn't make you sneeze and suffer so much?"

"Huh. I guess?"

"Good," Cas concludes with a jut of his chin. "His name is Honey," Cas announces, raising the kilt that was on his lap to reveal a…

"What the hell is that thing?" Dean shouts, jumping to his feet.

"Honey is a texel guinea pig," Cas says, cuddling the little beast to his chest. The pet starts emitting a little noise in pleasure as Castiel caresses his fur. It has long curly hair. Its head is black with a white spot on the top while the rest of its body is a mismatch of large black, white and orange spots.

"It looks like a freaking sheep!" Dean exclaims, sending a betrayed look to his brother that is already kneeling next to Cas and petting at the small animal.

"See, Sam, we do have a guinea pig now," Cas says proudly, making Sam chuckle at what is obviously a private joke between them.

"We don't have anything! I'm allergic, Cas, remember? My health…," Dean finishes, faking a cough. Sam rolls his eyes while Cas squints at him.

"I don't think you are, Dean. Honey has been on my lap all night and you haven't shown any signs of allergy. I've looked at you closely to make sure."

"Do you think he likes kale?" Sam asks, taking the little beast on his own lap as he sits on the ground.

"I think he might, Sam. The internet says guinea pigs need to eat a lot of vegetables. Do you want us to go and try to feed him some?"

"Yes!" Sam declares, squeezing delicately the pet against his chest as he gets up.

"But-," Dean tries to protest.

"I bought him a little hammock that he really likes," Cas tells Sam as he gets up too.

"But I haven't-"

"That's cute! I want to see it!" Sam says eagerly.

"My allergies…," Dean finishes lamely as he watches the two other men leave the room without a look in his direction. He scowls, staring at the beer he's still holding. He sulks for all of thirty seconds before he grumbles. "Dammit, I want to see the tiny hammock too. Guys, wait for me!"

**********************

"Oh, that's...that's a nice...tree."

"It's supposed to be Sam," Cas says with a pout, looking at his very first painting.

"Yeah no, I mean, behind him? The big woody thing?"

"That's you," Castiel pouts, looking dejected.

Dean grimaces, inclining his head to try, and identify himself in the glob of paint on the canvas.

"So you're not Van Gogh," Dean finally declares. "Or Mozart. The important thing is that you wanted to give it a try and you did. If you liked doing it, then that's what matters, no matter the end result," Dean tries to reassure, squeezing his friend's shoulder reassuringly. He learned his lesson when his words about Cas' lack of music skill were not so delicate, and the ex-angel ended up giving him the cold shoulder for a whole week.

When he looks back at him, Cas has a small smile on his lips and a look so full of...of something, that Dean can feel his cheeks warming a little. Seconds pass and Cas keeps staring until Dean clears his throat, forcing himself to look back at the ugly painting.

"What's next on your list?"

A hand pulling on his arm makes him turn back toward Castiel. Dean barely has time to react before his friend's lips brush with his. It's so fast and soft that he's left blinking in confusion, wondering if that really happened.

"This was."

Cas is still smiling, even though Dean recognizes the worried line creased between his brows. The hunter opens his mouth, but doesn't know what to say. To say that he wasn't expecting it would be an understatement. To say that he never thought about it, a lie. To say that he regrets it…

"I liked doing it," Cas declares, nodding his head in satisfaction. "Now I want to ride a horse."

"A- a horse?"

"Unless we can still get a camel?" Cas teases, acting hopeful. He sends Dean a wink - a goddamn wink - before he grabs his painting under one arm and leaves the room.

"Ride a...Wait. Cas! We're not getting a horse either! Cas!!"

*************************

When Dean finds him, Castiel is sitting on the bench Dean made from the trunk of one of the trees they had to cut down to make this space into their garden. The sun hasn't set yet, but the end of september's evenings are already colder. The last flowers of the season are blooming, and the vegetables they planted in the spring are starting to wilt, only a few tomatoes popping red among the green and yellowing stems.

Cas is bending forward, forearms resting on his legs. His eyes are closed and for a minute, Dean is worried that something happened, that he's sad or sick. He's reassured when he hears the low murmur of Cas' words, see the slight smile at the corner of his lips, the one Cas always gets when he's trying to be funny.

His friend hasn't heard him approaching yet, so Dean waits, trying not to eavesdrop on a conversation he's not supposed to be a part of.

Dean takes the time to check on the apple trees he planted instead. They're too young yet, too small to give any fruit, but by next year, maybe...He can't wait to bake a pie with his own apples. He rolls his eyes at the thought, that's so domestic. Yet here he is, planning on planting strawberries and raspberries, checking on the squash that is starting to grow and wondering if it'll be ready by Thanksgiving.

Vegetables are Sam's thing. Flowers and the small hive they've built are Cas'. Dean is in charge of the fruits.

They planted their garden over the underground garage, hidden by such a large ply of trees that there is no risk of anyone stumbling upon it by accident. They had to cut down trees, dig out every root, and plow the whole area to prepare the soil. They've spent nearly all spring and a good part of summer working to create that little bit of garden on the Bunker's roof. They've bought so many gardening tools that they're already making plans to build a shed here in the spring.

It's nice. The bunker is feeling more and more like a home, like a place Dean could feel himself growing old in, maybe.

They've talked about buying a house, especially Sam, but somehow they can't see themselves leaving anywhere else than in the bunker. It's their legacy, the place they were always meant to be, and they've come to love it despite all the horrors that happened there in the past.

Maybe it will change someday. Maybe Sam will want to marry someone, to buy a more traditional place with a white picket fence where he can raise kids without fearing that they'll choose a cursed object or weapon laying around as their next toy. Dean has noticed more and more of Eileen's clothes in the laundry, more of her things left behind every time she comes to visit. He hopes it's only a matter of time before he's not surprised to see her at breakfast anymore.

By the time he's checked on the fruit part of the garden, Cas has stopped praying and is observing him. The sun is setting, painting an orange glow behind him, and for a second it nearly looks like Cas has a hallo.

"You told Jack about the horse riding lesson?" Dean asks as he straddles the bench to sit next to his friend. He rubs his hands against the cold, blowing into them to try and warm them up a little.

"Maybe," Cas says with a mocking smile that makes Dean balks.

"Oh, come on, you promise you wouldn't tell anyone about me falling on my ass!"

Cas chuckles at the memory of Dean's horse throwing him into a giant mud puddle. Dean had cursed for a whole ten minutes as he struggled to stand up but kept falling right back on his ass. It made Cas laugh so much that he'd started crying. That's a thing Cas does now, he laughs. He does it more and more, and Dean is amazed by it, every single time.

"Technically, I didn't tell anyone anything," Cas argues with a smirk. He's not wrong. They have no idea if Jack can even hear their prayers now that he's taken charge of and close up Heaven. That doesn't stop them from regularly praying to him, especially Cas.

"You tell Sam and I'll bury your damn guinea pig next to the tomatoes," Dean threatens.

"No you won't," Cas says with a fond smile.

"No, I won't," Dean admits, pouting half-heartedly. He's actually come to like the damn beast. Which no one would actually know if Honey didn't start screeching every time Dean comes near it, calling for the treat that he knows Dean will give him. It was supposed to be their little secret but Honey blew their cover more than once. Dean is still pretending he hates the little ball of fluff, on principle, even though no one is fooled anymore.

"You were right about the horse, I hadn't realized the amount of dejection it actually produces," Cas concedes. "Also, my bottom is sore from the ride," he adds, squirming a little in his seat.

Dean chokes a little on his saliva at the image that brings to mind. Honestly, even without the innuendo, watching Cas ride a horse, hips rising and bending over the saddle, has done quite a number on Dean's libido. If he hadn't been questioning his sexuality before, he would definitely be now. Good thing he already was. Cas kissing him has been the only thing on his mind for days now. They haven't talked about it, and Cas is acting like it didn't even happen, but Dean has barely slept since then, spending his nights thinking about Cas' lips on his, and how he might possibly maybe want to do that again.

"Did you kiss Sam too?" he blurts out. It's not the most subtle or delicate way to bring up the subject, but apparently that's what his brain has chosen to say. Damn you, brain!

"Why would I kiss Sam?" Cas asks, looking genuinely astounded by the question.

"Wasn't that on your list?" Dean asks, scratching the back of his neck.

Cas squints at him like he's the most idiotic thing he's ever seen and, well, Dean probably is.

Dean squirms under the stare, rubbing his hands again, as much against the cold as in nervousness. The ex angel gives a long suffering sigh before he grabs Dean's wrists. He pulls on his hands until they're under his own sweater. Dean is so startled that he just looks at the bulge his hands are making over Cas' stomach with wide eyes, not daring to move his fingers. They're nestled between Cas' tee-shirt and his abdominal muscles. It's so warm under there that his skin is tingling from the temperature difference.

"You're an idiot, Dean Winchester," Cas declares. Dean looks up, and Cas is looking at him so fondly that it makes him blush a little.

"Yeah," he sighs. "I know."

"I must be one too, because I would very much like you to be my idiot for as long as you would have me," Cas confesses, a little shy as he draws patterns on the shape of Dean's fingers over the tissue of his sweater.

"I'm not sure, Cas," Dean says, making the other man tense up. "Are you sure you want to be stuck with me forever?"

It takes a minute for Cas to get his meaning, brow furrows intensely before they relax in realization.

"That was my plan all along," Cas says, his smile so wide it's showing his gums.

And yeah, knowing Cas, it probably was. Cas would have stayed by Dean's side forever whether he was an angel or a human or even a God. Hell, Cas was ready to stay by his side when Dean was turning into a monster bearing the mark of Cain, and when he was a demon. He wanted to stay by Dean's side even when Dean was cruel and screaming at him to go. It was the irony of it all, wasn't it? It always felt like Cas was leaving him, running away for angel business or whatever, but Dean never ever doubted that he would come back. He always knew Cas would come back somehow. After all, even death could never keep Cas away for long.

Dean slides his hands a little higher, making Cas shiver as they travel over his torso under his shirt. Dean's fingers tightens around the cloth, and pulls Cas closer, close enough that their noses are nearly touching.

"And now it's mine too," Dean sworns,resting his forehead against the other man's. He cradles Cas' jaw, passing a thumb under one of his eyes. The stubborn angel refuses to close them, even though they're so close that he's going cross eyed. Still, he keeps looking right into Dean's green orbits and hell, that must mean Dean can't keep his eyes off Cas either

When they kiss, it's sappy and tender and sweet and everything Dean always thought he could never have. The relief he feels makes Dean wonders if it isn't everything he's been waiting for all along, without even realizing it.

Cas is right by his side, as always, and Dean is damn well going to keep him as close as he can for as long as he possibly can. And hey, he knows the guy ruling Heaven now, so that might just be forever.

The End.

#destiel #deancas #dean/cas #dean/castiel #destiel fic #spn fix it #fic #destiel fix it #ao3 fic #Dean/castiel fanfic

45 notes · View notes