#anyways is just a set up of sorts i guess. i hope i dont have to revisit this often >:v

[10hourshift]

Chapter 18

<prev -start- next>

Now in video ig

[illubean]

ohemgee hi! I saw ur post asking for requests and wanted to request something that's been flosting around in my head for a while- could i request a PLATONIC gojo satoru x fem!reader and a romantic bestfriend! megumi fushiguro x fem!reader where megumis out on a mission and reader misses him so she's ranting and complaining to gojo about it? Also i was thinking like reader just has a crush on megumi (megumi also likes her back) and reader's yearning over him to gojo and gojo's just like "WE GET IT." If u don't wanna write it with gojo, i don't mind the request with literally any other student in the tokyo jujutsu high! Thank u in advance! (Feel free to ignore this if u dont wanna write it <3)

Missing U

Characters: Megumi Fushiguro Type: Oneshot, Fluff, Fem!Reader

sort of wrote Gojo in here but not really >.< hope u like anyway!

Warnings: none

"Sighh..."

Currently you were sprawled upside down on the common room couch. Yuuji was watching one of his weird films on the TV while Nobara was flipping through some teen magazine. The only first year that was missing was Megumi.

"Siggggghhhhh."

Your two friends continued to ignore you, focusing on whatever had their attention at the moment. You sunk towards the floor, deciding to just let yourself fall and rest there.

"SIIIIGGGGHHH-"

"Girl if you don't SHUT THE FUCK UP I'm going to have to beat the shit out of you," Nobara warned, her eyebrow twitching in annoyance as she gripped her magazine tighter.

"What's up with you anyways?" Yuuji asks, eyes still focused on the TV.

You sat up, resting your arms and head against the couch cushions.

"I miss my man."

Your pink haired friend raised an eyebrow at this, glancing down at your pouting self before Nobara clarified.

"By her man, she means Megumi."

"Since when were you guys together?"

You huffed, leaning further into the couch while you mumbled out your response.

"We're together in my head."

Megumi had been your best friend since you got to Jujutsu Tech. He was the only other first year at the time, and even though he's pretty nonchalant most of the time he wasn't too hard to get close to. Honestly, he lets you get away with a lot of stuff that wouldn't slide had it been anyone else.

But that's just because you guys have known each other the longest, right?

"Why don't you just ask him out then?" Yuuji asked.

Your crush on Megumi was anything but a secret. All of the students knew, Gojo knew, hell, even the students from the Kyoto sister school could tell. Everyone knew but Megumi himself it seems.

"It's not that simple Yuuji!! I want him to make the first move. Besides, I don't even know if he's into me like that. What if he- OW!"

Before you could go on a rant, Nobara chucked her magazine right at your face.

"We get it, you're in love! If you're not going to do anything about it then stop complaining!"

It was silent for a few moments, save for the sound of the TV and rustling of paper while your brunette friend retrieved her magazine.

Several beats of silence.

Until-

"Siigghhhhhh...I miss him..."

With a scowl on her face, Nobara rolled up her magazine and raised it in preparation to hit you. You braced yourself for impact and as if on cue, you heard two sets of footsteps approaching.

"Guess who's back from that totally important mission!" your teacher spoke. You practically shot up from your spot on the floor, before leaning against the back of the couch, trying to act as cool as possible.

"Welcome back. How'd it go?"

"It went great! As a matter of fact, it went so great you should go hang out with your best friend!"

Gojo rests his hands on Megumi' shoulder, positioning the dark haired boy in front of him while Nobara got up from her spot to drag you around the couch and push you towards the door.

"Yeah, for the love of god, take her!"

The brunette shoved you outside, Gojo following suit to do the same to Megumi before giving you a "Have fun!" before slamming the door shut.

It was just now you realized the boy was holding a (favorite color) gift bag, a light shade of pink dusted over his cheeks as he avoided eye contact.

"Here. For you," he said, bringing his arm up to hold the bag out to you.

"Thanks Megs, but what's this for?"

"Just open it."

You opened up the bag and looked inside to see an arrangement of your favorite snacks. Taped on the inside of the bag was a note, that you gently peeled off and read to yourself. In neat handwriting it read

'Will you be my girlfriend?'

[simplyreveries]

Can I request for Lilia, Trey, Kalim on how they will confess to F!MC?

confessions; lilia, trey, and kalim!

lilia vanrouge

he already has basically indirectly taken you out on dates. for instance, when he once brought you to diasomnia to eat (dont worry, not his cooking) and it happened to be JUST the two of you to make it. with flowers and candles and everything. how convenient. he stares at you from his side of the table with his head in his hands as you look around at the little set up confused... but it's not like you're complaining anyways.

he sort of treats you already like you are in a relationship. i mean, with how close he has gotten to you- sometimes it may just feel that way around him. he likes that. he's always treating you and talking to you how someone in a relationship would. but its also easy to confuse that with how he normally is since he is... pretty eccentric.

with lilia, its truly a mystery on when or how he'll confess to you. lilia has no problem being open with his feelings, he does bring it up to the others in diasomnia. but lilia has basically already confessed to you all the time, he straight up tells you. you could ask him why he likes being around you so much and lilia will simply state "because i love you, why else?".

trey clover

treys mind gets preoccupied for a while, troubled with the idea on how to even confess to you. he'll be what seems to be in thought and ends up getting distracted from tasks and duties often. even you yourself ask what's the matter and he'll snap out and give you a small smile "hm? ah well, rook did something pretty crazy earlier during science club today...." he laughs and brushes it off. nope he was trying to figure you out more, thinking what you would want most in a confession.

unfortunately for him as well, he doesn't have exactly anyone to ask for advice, he's usually the guy people go to for help and such. though he would confide in riddle, his own childhood friend... riddle is not quite experienced with love himself ^^;. and cater is well... cater. probably gave him a bunch of completely over the top ways but trey laughs telling him that isn't exactly his thing.

i've mentioned this before but trey canonically isn't good at professing love or be all smooth with flirting.... like at all. like he's really bad at it. so, he prompts to do something he is actually good at and decides to make a gift basket of sorts filled with your most favorite baked goods. he even decorated them to look cute, he's got good experience when at his family's bakery anyway. with that, he'll write you a sweet but simple letter. since he can't really bring himself to say it in words.

kalim al-asim

you could see his infatuation with you from a mile away. he is so painfully obvious you'd have to be completely dense not to see. nevertheless, kalim still wants to ask you out, the right way! an amazingly romantic way! he'd come excited to jamil at literally an early hour of the morning after thinking about it practically all night. knocking at his dorm door and be like "guess what! i came up with the most perfect plan!!" proceeds to instantly gets the door slammed on him.

kalim spends the whole day getting ready, trying his best to get everything ready. he'll have a normal party/celebration at his dorm and when you're both on a carpet ride boom, he'll confess to you. he spends the whole day smiling like a total idiot as he gets everything ready. at least that's how he imagines and hopes it'll turn out.

he cannot keep his eyes off of you the whole time, he's practically glued to your side. unfortunately, as he WAS about to confess, holding your hands to him, looking at you with a lovestruck smile, there was a mishap on the carpet ride. it wasn't seriously bad and besides, it only led to the two of you laughing together as you get up. even though you two are a bit disheveled and his "perfect plan" got messed up. he'll happily continue and blurt out the rest of his confession right there.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for inviting my cousin to an LGBT meet up?

Cw: mentions of suicide and transphobia

I (18M) am a trans man and my cousin N (21F) is a lesbian who is very masc presenting. We're the only queer cousins in the family (at least in our generation) so weve always been good friends and shes been one of the biggest supporters of my transition, defended me from bigoted family members and always corrected family when they used my deadname/old pronouns. I lowkey hoped she would come out as a trans man or nonbinary as well. We dress in the same style which makes it so when were hanging out together one of us is gonna get misgendered since people asume both of us are trans men or masc girls. When N is the one being misgendered she doesnt bother fighting it since its more trouble than its worth but looking back i think it really annoyed her.

Earlier this year N was severely struggling with her mental health. I apologize for the wording i may have since i dont know the proper terminology for this stuff or any specific disorder diagnosis she may have (other than autism). She was having some sort of manic or depressive episode. She was dead set on pushing people away and making them hate her so she could take her own life without regrets.

I visited N once to give her my support during a struggling time but i stupidly told her there was nothing she could say that would push me away. She told me not to test her but i kept pushing it and i admit what happened next was my fault. She told me in a very cold voice that she was a terf, though that she didnt want me dead but that "we" (im guessing she meant trans ppl) made it so much harder for her to exist(???????). I didnt let her keep talking just and left her room, said my goodbyes to her family and just cried while driving home.

Im still not sure if she meant it or if it was part of her mental episode and just a way for her to hurt me and push me away. On one hand ig it explains some of her behavior? N sometimes complained when she got asked for her pronouns or being misgendered like I mentioned before. On the other hand, I gen do not believe she has been a terf all along esp with how supportive shes been of me. If she was a terf youd think she would try to subtly talk me out of it, but that has never happened. My friends have nicknamed her schrodinger's terf lol

Anyway, i went no contact with N for a few months for my own wellbeing. During this time i heard that she tried to kill herself a few times, which got her into a mental hospital. She was given higher doses of meds and seems to be doing way better.

We had a family reunion this week and i decided to approach her. N seemed a little hesitant to talk to me but stayed polite. I tried testing her and talked about the effects T has been having on me but she acted like she always had and congratulated me and even complimented me on how deep my voice has gotten. I wasnt satisfied cause i wanted an apology for what she had said to me so i pushed it more. She did end up apologzing but it was a very surface level apology. At this point i didnt want to keep pushing in case it set her off again so i just took her apology (plus i wanted my best cousin back) and spent the rest of the day hanging out with her.

On the way home my mom said she was happy me and N had made up and that i should invite her to the lgbt club meetings Ive been going to this year. It seemed like a good idea to me, she lost a few friends during her episode and she could make more queer friends here. If N is trans and just in denial it could help her get the resources she needs to feel comfortable coning out. If N IS a terf maybe having more positive interactions with trans ppl could change her mind on it. Overall i thought it would be a win for her.

I brought it up to my friends and some of them blew up at me. Their argument was that itd be exposing the other trans ppl in the group to a terf and putting them in danger. I truly hadnt considered this angle so im kinda conflicted now. She had never felt like an unsafe person before and now that her episode is over she feels normal again. Even if she is a terf i dont think she could actually cause harm? I want N to get better but i dont want to put my trans friends at risk.

So tumblr, WIBTA for inviting N to my lgbt meet up?

What are these acronyms?

[merlinfic]

group ask for lost fics #45

Hi y’all! Below are a few lost fics that us mods just can’t seem to find. That being said, we’re hoping that you lovely followers are able to help! If anyone knows any of the fics below please reply below if you know of a fic!

Note: previous group asks and all lost fics!

Anon 1 asked:

I’ve looked for this particular fic for a long time now, but it was a modern day Christmas fic in which Merlin and Arthur are together and Uther disapproves <<>> I can’t quite remember specifics other then Arthur being jelly of Merlin dating someone else? Or something to that effect anyway long story short they wind up together in the end and Uther gets past his bias X’D I’m sad to see you guys go, but I’m so grateful for all the fic recs that have been left <33333

Anon 2 asked:

hi! thank you so much for all your hard work over the years and helping to keep this fandom alive, ive got a lost fic. i dont remember much but there was a noble of some kind who was mistreating servants and he tried to mistreat gwen and merlin stepped in for her and then arthur came to save the day. thank you !! <3

miraniel asked:

Combed all the tags I could think of & still can't find this fic, worried it's deleted: Merlin, Gwen & Gwaine r captured by bandits/minions looking for Emrys. Merlin casts a protection spell on Gwen before they're caught. Evil sorcerer tries to take Emrys's power by absorbing it into a (staff? crystal?) but absorbs Merlin's soul too. Rest of fic is about getting M's soul back in his body. At one point, he & Arthur share a body. I think Kilgarrah fixes them in the end. Ty SO much! Love this blog!

Anon 3 asked:

hello! do you perhaps know what fic those quotes are from? do you know how much i love you? do you know that i would do anything for you, anything at all? crown and kingdom and anything ever promised to me, i’d give it up, i’d give it all up—tell me, do you know? / and arthur loves him, he loves him so much that he fears his chest will splinter open and spill all of it into the space between them.

Anon 4 asked:

there was this fic i read some while back where merlin was a royal, and arthur and merlin were like bffs. i think arthur was the head knight?? there was a particular scene were merlin got a dragon tattoo on his back. i wonder if you might know which fic this is? thank u so much

the-tortoise-lady asked:

Hi :D I adore you people!! I'm looking for a fic set in Camelot, where Merlin is hurt (I think it was something with his leg? Not sure tho) and then Arthur spends a lot of time with Merlin, caring for him a bit? And there's one moment I remember when he's reading to Merlin and they're all cuddled up on some sort of sofa and there's a lot of emotions and feels? And fire in the fireplace? It's definitely Merlin/Arthur I think, I guess there also were some love confessions? I just sadly can't seem to find it.. I know that I read it on ao3 I hope you can find it (no pressure tho please!!) Lots of love and appreciation and a big thank u from me :)

Anon 5 asked:

Hi, I hope you have a nice day :) I've scoured the internet and also your page for this specific fanfic that I read a while back. Essentially Arthur finds out about Merlin's magic and holds him at swordpoint. They stand right next to a cliff and Merlin startles which makes him fall off. Merlin then discovers his own immortality, when he wakes up at the bottom of the cliff. But him being kept alive does not mean he is healed of his injuries. He puts himself back together for months down there if I remember correctly. The druids show up to help at a certain point I think. Please help me, I loved that fic so much :(

thelady-mary asked:

Hello, I just wanted to say that I'll miss this blog DEARLY and everything you guys did here, it means a lot to me, truly. Ok, so I've ADHD and I can't describe things for shit so I'll put the fanfic I'm looking for as a list. 1- it was some sort of 5+1 type, with multiple chapters, I remember that includes some jealousy and he knows about the magic. It was like Arthur was learning little things about Merlin that he started to love. 2- the things that he learn (and what I remember) was: Merlin's body hair grows really fast and he said that Gaius believe it was an outlet for his magic, they're traveling and M forgot his blade (the thingy that shaves beard) and he has this beautiful beard and long wavy hair by the end of the week, when they come back A is occupied with stuff and didn't saw M all day, but at the end he's back with short hair again saying that Gwen and George helped him with his chores so he could get a hair cut and shave; also A talks about how he recently learn that dyes are expensive and wants to know how M have such a colourful wardrobe and he says he only have two tunics because his mom helped a merchant out once and he gave her two pieces of fabric with she made the tunics and his neckerchiefs; Merlin knows how to write beautifully, calligraphy and all, M gets sick in this part and they communicate via little notes send it via George who told A that he was hesitaning into giving him M's note on the beginning because he thought it was improper, A keeps one that says "I believe in you" because he needs it emotionally; Merlin can compose music and he did compose and wrote an entire play (or just one song, I don't remember much), he dedicated one song to Arthur. 3- Arthur makes an announcement talking about love and union, looking directly at Merlin, hoping that he would understand that it was more or less about his feelings for him. 4- the song dedicated to Arthur it was about a Knight falling in love with his servant (and I believe running away with him, but don't quote me on that) 5- Arthur believes that the song is about Lance and Merlin's relationship, since is about a knight and not a King, and decided to go after him thinking his heart belongs to another. 6- Merlin confess that he wrote the song dedicated to him and ask what he thought about it, but Arthur is still under the wrong assumption and says that he liked the "song about the boat" better. 7- Merlin is devastated and I remember Arthur seeing him with Lancelot, with him giving him comfort 8- I don't remember how, but they confess to one another and have a little fight over the song part. And this is all I remember, I'm sorry if is really big or even impossible, but I'm desperate.

Anon 6 asked:

Hello! First of all, thank you for the years you've spent helping so many of us with finding fics, it really is very appreciated. Now, I've been wondering whether to ask or not for help with finding this fic for a while, but knowing you're going to soon close it up made me get over my shyness and just ask. The fic has Gwaine, Merlin and Arthur out doing... Something, and Merlin is forced to use his magic. Gwaine takes the fall, and Arthur banishes him to the nearby kingdom. I specifically remember Gwaine hugging Merlin and making him notice thar Arthur only drew out his sword after thinking it wasn't Merlin the sorcerer. The next part (I can't remember if it was a new chapter or a new part, sorry) has Arthur needing a sorcerer's help to decurse a land, I think, so the the knights of the round table all go to retrieve Gwaine. He and Merlin try to keep the lie up a bit, but then the truth comes out. That's all I remember, I hope it's enough. Thank you a

As always, this post will be updated if/when any fics are found!

[pjsk-headcanons]

*deep breath pt 3*

VIIIIIIIVIIIIIDDDDD BADDDDD SQUAAAAADDDD BABEYYYYYY

or should i say...

vbs: emu (unit leader), haruka, honami, minori

vbs -> PASSION P♤NIC (my brain is out of juice have you noticed)

-emu and haruka both attended RAD WEEKEND, it is still the end goal lol

-haruka quitted ASRUN earlier and thrn picked up singing after RAD WEEKEND. rad weekend was a lot later this time around i guess nagi you have to wait to die/j

-thought this would be funny that the event pp♤ had equivalent to Light Up the Fire would be haruka finding out about nagi with an (mixed event key story other than the anni ones hear me out)

-emu finds honami (i dont know how, maybe just a school-related thing happened) they become the P♤NIC part of the group name. honami is very cautious at first (because iykyk x2) but slowly gets into it

-haruka finds minori still trying to spread hope through being an idol (65+ attempts rejected this time) is impressed, they become PASSION.

-their sekai is called city SEKAI. (shoot btw s•s is still stage sekai i forgot to add that last time)

TRUST RANKS

emu - honami -> "P♤NIC!", "faith in you", "to keep that smile warm" (cried i didnt think id be this attached to this group this is the one i liked the least)

haruka - minori -> "PASSION!", "my idol...a street artist?!" (minori originally only join bc "i cant miss a chance to work with THE HARUKA KIRITANI!! not knowing shes gonna be a street artist), "understanding that hope" (minori o7 our true goat)

minori - emu -> "pure smiles☆~", "always cheering up!", "more than surpassing" (again- up to interpretation hehe)

honami - haruka -> "getting back into it", (they both are recovering from...something iykyk yahaha) "calmer smiles☆~", "so that i can be myself again"

minori - honami -> "dog walk pals!", "brought in by friends", "with hope, with fear" (hahhdhdjshahdhsjhd *sobs*)

haruka - emu -> "bright hair...!", "that night", "setting a spark for that tomorrow" (emu and haruka dream of being able to make songs that makr people hope for the "next day" - kind of equivalent to vbs want to "take over the world" for nagi because she couldnt? parallels sigh)

asking mod for some things:

1. should i make group songs (like a list of some sorts) after im done with loreposting? or focus on sekais? ill get to both eventually but i want to see what you mod and maybe others think

2. forgot to mention that i was not the one who spun the wheel. these groups were made as an april fools for a unit swap fic called reCYCLE. hehe

anyways. wxs next, eight characters left! any guesses for next time?

🌐 anon

.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Ookay this one is really really tooth rotting fluff level

Tadc x reader who just realized christmas is coming, and is freaking out with absolute glee and childlike wonder

TADC cast x reader who loves christmas!

AAAAAA im so so sorry i could have sworn i answered this but i guess i didnt??? i promise i didnt mean to leave this in the inbox this long on purpose i think i must have lost track of stuff </3 regardless, i hope you enjoy! admin must admit, asides from presents and the christmas tree, he doesnt do many holiday activities so... admin is underqualified for this but hes still gonna try! a lot of the character segments intertwine in this btw! like not in a "similar idea" thing but in a "they are actually overlapping and interacting with one another" way so !! side note unrelated to the post eheheheh the second batch of macarons have been piped! theyre now on the counter set out to dry, and ive got my ganaches out to get to room temperature so i can whip em up into a frosting :3

CAINE:

oh i just know that caine would lean hard into holiday stuff, plus i think he has the best sense of time in the digital world out of everyone.. plus he just seems like the kind of guy to celebrate all sorts of holidays, not just christmas! year round stuff, you know? not just winter... so you guys would likely team up and totally deck out the grounds to match the holiday spirit! sure caine on his own already puts in way too much effort decorating everything, he even makes it snow! but with you around he cranks it up to 11! lets just hope there arent any scrooges around, though.... also prepare yourself because he would definitely find a way to have christmas music play on loop in the background... somewhere... ambient music but its festive songs... i think caine is also the one responsible for most of the presents, since he can basically get most things with just a flick of his wrist! ooooo perhaps a date (platonic or romantic! up to you!) where you guys wrap the gifts together!

POMNI:

funny enough, while i usually think pomni would SUCK at cooking, i think she can make a mean hot coco. granted, hot coco and/or hot chocolate arent the hardest things to make, but... i dont know, its just different when she makes it... (recommendation from the admin, add a bit of cinnamon or nutmeg to your hot coco its a game changer frfr, this goes for a lot of chocolate stuff, actually. its like the chocolate-coffee effect but like. makes a different flavor profile. add a bit of nutmeg to your chocolate chip goodies. rn.)

anyways! pomni always keeps you supplied with hot coco, and honestly it benefits you both! keeps you nice and warm, plus its delicious; and it gives pomni something to do... i mean, its christmas... surely she can take it easy from trying to find the exit... just for the season... helps with her anxiety about the whole situation, you know? making digital food sure is weird, though...

RAGATHA:

as mentioned in gangles part, she joins you and gangle in helping making a skirt for the tree! keeping up with the idea of sewing things, i think she would also make stockings for everyone; leaving most of them blank so everyone can customize them however they like... but you and her get together to decorate your own together and just !! i just think thats sweet! depending on how soon caine starts putting the christmas stuff around, you and her might be able to make some ugly sweaters for yourselves! thats a christmas thing, right? oooo and they match.... OOOO YOU GUYS MAKE AN EXTRA LONG SCARF FOR YOU GUYS TO SHARE!!!! rolls around... she makes you mittens so you can go mess around in the snow caine put all over the grounds

JAX:

snowball fight. and i mean really intense once. in fact it wouldnt be too much of a stress to call it a snowball WAR! honestly jax might just be the type to put rocks in his snowballs.... but because this is meant to be nice and sweet, he wont... just this once, and because he feels TOO mean crushing your holiday spirit (even if your digital body would quickly recover from the possible injury...)

you guys make forts and go absolutely ham. the stuff ragatha had made for the two of you! i mean sure you guys cant succumb to hypothermia, buuuuuuuuuut being really painfully cold still sucks... but the sweaters help you guys stay out for longer to play! and you can perhaps ask pomni to make some hot coco

oh yes its all coming together

ooo perhaps you convince jax to make snow angels and snowmen with you... though, i think jax would make the snowmen purposefully unappealing... but maybe you think hes actually trying his best... oh you jolly little thing..

KINGER:

okay so i admit this one might be a stretch and its mostly because his robe already has the fur and he gives off grandpa energy (even though hes only 48 but hey some grandpas become grandpas young) but imagine somehow someway he dresses up as santa (and i say that loosely, his robe turns red and the fur turns a plain white), bonus if he wears a hat to tie in the entire look. while caine is the one getting the gifts and wrapping them, i like to think kinger would ask to be the one to put them under the tree at an ungodly hour. sweet man. chews

as for an interaction with the reader... hmm.. hes the last character im writing, everyone else already has their parts done... the one christmas activity i can think of that hasnt been taken yet is baking! honestly i can see him being a decent chef! maybe its the dad/granddad energy speaking to me again... perhaps its the admin projecting... buuuut imagine you two make shaped cookies togehter; stars, candy canes, trees, bells, ect... and you ice them together! sure they may not be the prettiest or look the most professional; but does that really matter when youre having fun? they still taste delicious!

ZOOBLE:

ok i get it, i tend to lean hard into the zooble being negative and/or unimpressed with things a liiiiiiiiittle too often, but again zooble doesnt strike me as the type to enjoy most holidays. they seem more of a halloween person to me, you know? though, i think that they would switch out their antennae for ones that resemble antlers more... or if they dont have those, they string lights up on them! all for you, just because they know how excited the holiday makes you. they dont care about many things, but they care about you... and if it means doing (harmless) things they normally wouldnt do, then so be it! dont expect them to get in on many holiday activities, though...

GANGLE:

you and her make decorations for the grounds and the giant digital tree caine put in the main common area! handmade ornaments, paper stars and snowflakes, things like that! you and gangle stay up take cutting each thing, applying the colors and the glitter and any small details.... dozens of times.... because caine chose a tree that was way too big than it needed to be.... oh you might have to have gangle on your shoulders so she can reach the higher points of the tree! sits and thinks.... ooouuuuuuuuugh you guys make a skirt for the tree together with the help of ragatha... little group activity... sobs...

[komaedas-fragments]

Ah, I suppose it’d be beneficial to write some sort of introduction. Though, would it even be necessary? I doubt anyone would find this anyways.

But, my name is Nagito Komaeda. I don’t have much of a talent, but in the eyes of Hopes Peak? I guess you could call me the Ultimate Lucky Student. I wouldn’t call it that, though.

I guess that’s all I have to say, besides, your interest is probably better directed elsewhere.

HELLO HELLO!!! mod here!! this is a blog based off of the despair arc/hpa time period of nagito komaeda. i created this as a joint account with @ultimatesomething-1191 !!! just a few guidelines bellow.

- she/her pronouns for mod!!! as for nagito, he/they <3

- i am a MINOR. send an nsfw ask and you get blocked, simple. i will respond to what im comfy with, and if im not comfy im not gonna respond

- i am a full-time college student, please keep in mind i wont be able to respond immediately

- im not here to be a 100% accurate representation of nagito komaeda, please keep that in mind!!!

- this is a kmhn heavy blog no doubt, if you’re not a fan thats okay! just dont come at me for it

EDIT: HI!!’ so the sprites used in rps or answering asks are all made by myself and might end up being posted on my main to be used for free, so please keep that in mind!!! :)

these sprites are currently being revamped to be a consistent set, bear with <3

THATS ALL!!!! ASK AWAY!!

[wildshona]

World Turned Upside Down

In late June this year I got a panicked phone call from Amelia. She had been sent out to get some groceries. When she got back she could hear dad and Zoe in the bath. Nothing unusual in that is there she said to me he used to bathe us lots of parents wash their kids at the same time they have a bath. She listened at the door smiling and content she said. then she heard hinm say "Go on, catch the eel."

I guess at that moment everything changed. Catch the Eel was the First Game. she rang me what should she do. well nothing was going to happen quickly. dad was methodical and had a strange set of beliefs on the right time and age for everything. she could be catching the eel for a year. Amelia knew that as well as me. she also told me that he had removed her birth control pills from the bathroom cabinet. He was not happy and some roles had to be re-affirmed.

i spoke to chris when i got off the phone and we went into conference with Richard. Richard managed to get through to his contacts in Virginia. I had agreed with Amelia the best and safest time for her to ring me and the plan was set.

A few days later on a day when dad would be at work and then going straight to a church meeting of some sort Richard's friends arrived to move Amelia and Zoe out. It all went like clock work.

Well, not exactly. Amelia left dad a note apologising for leaving and taking Zoe and thanking him for all he had done for her, explaining that she couldn't see Zoe become Shona and that she had help to leave, the letter was wet with her tears apparently. I mean FUCKING HELL!!!!

My hope was that once she had got away some authorities would move in on him. Amelia hadn't thought about that she didnt have my sense for revenge. Not like me. But no, he knew he was in trouble, humiliation, degradation, prison. Not how he saw himself. and he was able to do something he couldn't have done here. he had bought a gun as soon as he got to the States. now he used it. FUCK FUCK FUCK.

You know i read a tumblr post the other day some idiot from Tennessee saying how proud he was that his was the first state to pass into law mandatory death sentences for child rapists. DONT YOU GET IT YOU FUCKING ARSE? We want thenm to suffer for years in fear and pain like we did - not go quietly into this good night. But then this was a man talking what the fuck does he know.

and we'll just leave aside the fact that he probably believes that if the child is pregnant from that rape she has to have the baby or she could go to jail or whatever,

Anyway, Amelia and Zoe have been in a safe place since then. She is totally unable to run her life because every decision was made for her up til now, After all, how many tumblr postings have i read about girls and women only need to know about fucking their man and pleasing their man they dont have to have a brain.

Anyway, Richard has arranged for her and Zoe to be escorted back to England at the beginning of November. She will stay with us for a while which will be interesting to say the least given the different lifestyles we have. But in the long term we are going to have to find some man who can look after her and turn into a thinking human being and not just one of the Stepford Wives.

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

HII GM!!! i hope u had good worming time ehehe :3 anyway. now that you've spent some time w/ the undersiders & met a lot of the brockton bay wards & some of new wave + the prt!! i wanna hear ur thoughts on them in general + the world so far if u have any!! & also ur thoughts on like.... how powers happen & brian and taylor's origin stories etc if thats also something you've been thinking abt!! eyes emoji eyes emoji..

i am having SO much fun w worm. physically making myself put down my phone and walk away so i stop reading and do the productive things i promised myself i would do this weekend.

I AM SO. WARY. OF THE WARDS. I DONT TRUST THEM. its rlly cool 2 me that they all have powers that i myself would consider like. Bad or Scary. the emotion manipulation thing, the literal warping of time and space etc those are all things that i would be like. this feels overpowered to the point that i almost expect it more from a villain character to build dramatic tension. which. i guess in the meta sense still works bc theyre being set up as antagonists rn but you know what i mean!!!!!

i fully think we've reached the point where taylor is in way too deep to the extent that changing anything now would end horribly bad for her on both sides. shes still holding onto this thought that shes gonna have this dramatic reveal where she puts the villains in jail and the heroes welcome her with open arms. but after that conversation with armsmaster thats just !!!!!!! not going to fucking happen!!! it doesnt work like that!!! also there keep being these little sidebars and moments where she admits to herself that shes excited about villain work or like..a chance to hang out with her new friends. girl you are not going to join the protectorate i can see right thriugh your dumbass.

<< side note on all of this i have a little bit of a theory for this. i think tattletale probably. knows. she joined with the intention of betraying them eventually. im still sort offff kind of unclear as to the extent of lisas powers and how they work but at this point i dont know how she couldve possibly missed that huge elephant other than the possibility that she is intentionally ignoring it.

ANYWAY. IVE STRAYED FROM YOUR ACTUAL QUESTION IM SORRY I JUST LIKE THE UNDERSIDERS A LOT. i have a lot of thoughts on the meta of the story and the role reversal of "villains good heroes bad" that i know some cape media does sometimes and im not exactly sure jf thats what worm is going for but i AM AWARE OF IT . and i think that is playing a little bit of why i am biased like this. but this is not to say i dont like the heroes i wan 2 know everything about them. however i dont trust them. SUPER interested in what Amy's got going on w her dad and the fact that she fucking turned off taylors powers????? despite saying she wasnt gonna mess with brain stuff?????? i think amys gonna get rlly fucked up about something pretty soon. i could see her snapping and turning into some crazy supervillain esp in the last interlude where she talked about how much pressure she and others put on herself w healing everything and everyone.

uhhhhhhh what else. hey powers coming from trauma is pretty fucked up huh!!!!! u know whats rlly funny is like. i sort of expected it to be somethinf bad like that but i was also wasnt expecting the angle that like. the powers are unrelated to whatever the event was??????? like im sure u could find ways to connect each of their powers to their trigger event but its not ljke. obvious ?? i guess?? like taylor wasnt bittem by a radioactive bug that gave her bug controlling powers u know??? im rlly rlly excited 2 learn abt more characters trogger events just to like. expand the data pool and see if yhere is a correlation between the power that they get and the event that happens. or if the power theyre born with the potential of having is just set in stone or whatever. does that makr ANY sense

[harpers-tartarus]

Thank you so fucking much for the chapter, yes i already finished, yes i commented on ao3 but i also wanted to do it here lol, i dont know how to feel except that i want to read the whole fic again and that i didn't understand anything that Selenar say (but that's my fault, english is not my first language) ANYWAY thank you and i love you take care of you 💖💖💖

Oh no! I didn't think about that! So here's what she said in the chapter with the accent removed:

There was a woman just…standing there, watching everything happening and doing nothing. Hooded in black with a watch dangling from a chain hooked to her belt, loudly ticking each second away.

“Why aren't you doing anything?” she demanded, the more pressing issue than who exactly she was.

--

She grumbled her annoyance into the grass. “What the fuck?” she demanded emphatically.

The woman tutted again. “I did warn you. You don’t interrupt the Name-Earning. You don’t interrupt the Death-Making.”

That made her go still. Of course, she was familiar with that trial. She’d undergone it herself when she was just shy of her first century, it was how she became known as the Wild Hunt, not just as its leader.

“She’s just a child!” Selenar was aghast. It was unheard of for someone to undergo the trial at Hope’s age.

--

“What’re you doing in the forge?” she asked when she finally set her sights on the girl. “And what on earth are you wearing?”

The fire was roaring and Hope had forgone a shirt, likely out of fear that the billowing sleeves would catch fire, but that left her in just a chest binding which looked a sight; a sort of welder’s mask that was vaguely bird-like, hiding her face from view, trousers made for a man that were only held up by the exceedingly tight belt she had at her waist.

“I don’t want to catch fire,” Hope complained, words muffled behind the mask.

“That’s going to impede your breathing.” Selenar countered. “You have to bind properly, Sev, I keep telling—” And then she faltered and gritted her teeth together, looking away, blinking fiercely.

Sev’ildan wasn’t here. She was alone, far from her brothers, too far to help them if they got into trouble.

“Your brother binds his chest?” Hope asked carefully, lifting the mask so that Selenar could see her face, smeared with soot and gunpowder.

She sighed. “He used to. Sev was…born with the wrong body. His human family was less accepting of that than most, tried to fix him, send him to this camp on your world… it was barbaric, that they thought they could just make him think he was a girl and that would fix everything.” Selenar looked up and Hope’s expression was painfully soft and understanding; heat burned in her eyes.

Selenar offered her hands to Hope. “I can fix it, if you like.” She didn’t reach out to fix it immediately like a human would’ve, without any concern for her carefully constructed boundaries, Selenar was better than that.

It was only after Hope gave a single nod that she reached out and carefully loosened the binding, retying it securely so that her breasts were still protected, but no longer that breathing was impeded.

Hope expanded her lungs tentatively. “Thanks,” she said after a moment.

“What’re you making?” Selenar asked instead.

“Making bullets, mostly,” Hope admitted. “I found an old rifle in the armory that I’m going to make some advancements to…and there was this pair of flintlock pistols that I’m going to clean up and make one into a crossbow.”

The first question she had was ‘why not just make more crossbow bolts for a ready-made crossbow?’ that would’ve been simpler, but then a new question came.

“Why are you making weapons?”

--

“Hey?” Selenar nearly screeched. “What in the name of the Great Mother—!”

“Oh, don’t worry about it, happens a lot,” Hope disparaged.

“It does?” Selenar’s pitch rose high. “What—”

“It’s a total bitch, coming back,” Hope continued over her, cracking her neck loud enough that Selenar winced, “but I’m unable to be murdered, which is a good gift, I guess, when people want to kill me as much as they do.”

Selenar was staring at her, uncommonly heartbroken. She stayed with her the whole day, keeping an eye on her, wincing when things went wrong, and then waiting for her to pick herself back up and start anew. And she when fired a shot that didn’t blow up in her face, but did splinter a tree explosively, she whirled around to meet Selenar’s eyes, her own bright and victorious and Selenar thought this was the godling that Sylvar was always meant to protect and her icy heart began to melt and beat again.

“You're learning the sword,” Selenar told Hope the next day while she was working on a new set of bullets. They were clearly for the rifle and not the pepperbox pistol -which after watching Hope go between the different guns for hours, Selenar had become partial to-, longer and with an eerie red sheen. Hope had swiped at her bloody nose and grinned reckless and feral and something had knotted in her chest.

“I was always told that I do better from a distance,” Hope mused, “that swords didn’t suit me.”

Selenar’s eyebrow twitched. “You're learning the sword,” she repeated in a tone that brooked no argument.

--

“Just because you can survive the damage doesn't mean you need to be forced to take it,” she reminded her. “Draw up your arm and guard.”

And then she struck hard and fast, enough that her healing shoulders pulled and ached.

--

“Admittedly, not much,” Selenar conceded, tongue between her teeth as she attempted to tune a lute that she’d found in an abandoned home just out of something to do with her fingers. “The queen likes to keep that closer to her chest, and it’s not as though there's many other people to ask.”

“Is it taboo or something?” Hope asked with a furrowed brow.

“Not quite, but it’s always plain that the topic is uncomfortable.”

Hope pursed her lips thoughtfully. “So, she wouldn’t have told you about how to get on and off the world, then.” It wasn’t really a question.

Selenar concurred with a nod. “I can't imagine that she would’ve told anyone…well, anyone except Carman.”

“Carman?” The name struck a chord with Hope, a familiarity that she couldn’t place after all the months on Fillory. “Why does that name sound familiar?” It was a question mostly towards herself rather than Selenar, but she received an answer nonetheless.

“You’ve heard of Morrigan’s sister?” Selenar was startled.

Hope snapped her fingers. “Oh, yeah! The Mad God! Cliodhna’s mother, yeah, Phogra told me about her.”

--

“Oh, good,” Selenar sagged, “you know about that…sorry, it’s just, she’s your grandmother.”

“Oh.” Hope blinked. She hadn’t really considered that, it had always felt as though she was someone far removed from her, not the woman that had given birth to the woman that had in turn given birth to her. “Yeah,” she said finally, “I guess she is.”

Selenar grimaced. “I know that your very close with Thanatos, but did he ever tell you about his human lover?”

--

“Carman was the lover that Adelaide wanted to free from the Fox.”

The words hit like a snowball to the face and Hope couldn’t help but gape at Selenar, unable to comprehend the words she was hearing. “What?” she said bleakly. “But that means…”

That means that both sides of her family had come together before.

“Fuck me, honestly,” she said, making Selenar choke on laughter. “This is not a winning combo, clearly.”

Selenar’s mouth twitched. “It has its merits.”

Hope cast an annoyed look her way. “Anyways,” she huffed, “so Morrigan locked the Beast within Carman and…also locked her away, right? That’s what Phogra says.”

She glanced down to her feet, where the god still slept in her shadow.

Selenar had no idea how she allowed that. The idea of being so close to a god made her skin itch. Morrigan was different, of course, but Morrigan didn’t stay in her shadow.

“Locked away in the Castle at the End of the World.”

“That’s dramatic,” Hope muttered.

“Drama is a requirement in your family,” Selenar replied. “It’s not quite a prison, at least, not in appearance, but it was commissioned by Calypso, surely you’ve heard her name.”

That gave Hope pause, lifting her head from where she was scrawling the details down in a book, mouth gaping. “You’re not serious,” she said, positively aghast. “The nymph that kept Odysseus for, what, ten years?”

“The very same,” Selenar agreed. “She called it the greatest commission of her career, built to contain even the most dangerous of monsters, even ones of godly proportions. Even ones like Him.” She shuddered, a flicker of fear casting across her face, making Hope twitch nervously; Selenar was so fearless that the idea of anything scaring her made her nervous. “Castle Blackspire, she called it.”

The words caught in Hope’s mind. “Wait, Castle Blackspire? That’s something!”

“No, it’s not, because, clearly, your Castle is called Whitespire and there isn’t another one in Fillory, I checked the maps—” Since Selenar had been able to walk upright, she’d scoured all the maps in the library to be sure.

“On this side, you mean,” Hope corrected, nearly gleeful.

Selenar arched an eyebrow, incomprehension plain. “Sorry?”

“On this side, there’s no Castle Blackspire,” Hope explained, hands waving in excitement. “Okay, so I read all the Fillory books when Lipson and Quinn compared my magic to the Virgo Blade from the books and there was a reference to Castle Blackspire. The dwarves that built the castle, they based it on what they considered to be the perfect design, something they called Blackspire.”

Her eyes were gleaming but Selenar wasn’t picking up what she was putting down. “Okay…?”

“Blackspire was on the underside of Fillory. When the gods Ember and Umber sprung into existence, they were constantly fighting for dominance, like the tale of Remus and Romulus, flipping the world back and forth like a coin, until Ember fell. So, if Whitespire was built on the heads side of Fillory, then—”

“Then Blackspire is on its tails side,” Selenar realized before faltering. “But that doesn't really help us get off of Fillory, now.”

--

Hope could barely open her eyes, she was so feverish and everything hurt so much, but she could just make out Selenar’s concerned eyes. “What’s wrong? Tell me!”

“I-I can’t, it’s too much,” Hope choked on her agony, on the desire to scream and rend stone. It had only been getting stronger and stronger with every nightmare, with every painful memory. “It hurts, it hurts so much!”

“What can I do?” Selenar demanded. “Bean, tell me—”

--

“What the fuck?” she murmured to herself as Hope’s consciousness slipped away.

--

“When d’you sleep?” she asked in the silence.

...

Presently, Selenar pulled back, suspicious. “Did whatever dream you had last night literally rattle your brain inside your skull?”

Hope threw back her head and laughed and she knew that wasn’t Io’s laugh, but the action still had her off-kilter. “I had to make room.”

“Make room?” Selenar repeated, confused. She wasn’t making any sense. It was like talking to someone who’d had a concussion and her brothers had dealt with that too many times to count in the war.

Hope arched an eyebrow, unimpressed. “I am mortal,” she pointed out, “my mind can’t handle the memories of multiple lives without making room for them. That’s not how it works.”

“How do you even know that that’s how it works?” Selenar’s confusion only increased.

...

Sel took a moment to stare up at the sky and wonder if this was the life she deserved. “I need to find a cliff.”

“Why?”

“To walk off it, what else?” she fired back and Hope rolled her eyes.

...

“I was-am the Wild Hunt,” she said finally, “I couldn't just leave and become a lowly guard to be close to my friends.”

“But Sylvar could?” Hope asked archly, standing to roll up the cloth for the sails.

“Sylvar had something to prove, I didn't,” Selenar said finally, eyes narrowing as she watched Hope’s shirt bunch and split to allow large wings full of midnight feathers to pierce through them.

...

“You’ve never flown with those, have you?” Selenar remarked just before Hope took a leap of faith and crashed immediately on her face.

She rolled her eyes at Hope’s grumbles of annoyance. “Here, let me show you—” She gripped Hope’s forearms and the next thing Hope knew, she was being thrown off the very mountain that had threatened to crush her only days ago.

--

“Sentient trees,” Selenar complained, “they're a load of—”

--

Selenar was still grumbling in annoyance, dripping water as she climbed her way back into the ship. “this place is unnatural,” she seethed.

“It’s from a children’s story,” Hope said, tilting her head and arching an eyebrow. “A series of stories.”

“Well, then, whoever wrote them was a fool,” Selenar complained, shaking the water off like a dog, the movement making the patches of scales along her skin shimmer and ripple.

Hope shrugged carelessly. “It’s another world, it’s not supposed to make sense. You don’t walk around Earth thinking it’ll be just like Annwn, do you?”

Selenar opted not to dignify that with a response, instead she chose to flop down on the deck and groan in complaint. “I’ve got to get off this goddess-forsaken world before my niece is born or so help me!”

...

Selenar must’ve seen a hint of how she felt flash across her face because she spoke slowly: “We don’t have to—”

...

Selenar gave her a look as she brought her own torch to steal some of the fire. “Dramatic,” she grumbled under her breath, ignoring Hope’s smirk. “Are you sure there’s anything in here of value?”

Hope shrugged, taking her torch with her further into the temple. “Well, it’s not like we were getting any answers anywhere else? That’s when you turn to the gods.”

“Hm. Interesting,” Selenar mused dryly. “Almost like a…last hope option.” Hope ignored the pun. “Especially for someone who has exhausted all o’ her options for saving her own life…” She cast a significant look Hope’s direction, which Hope opted to ignore, but she had truly walked right into that one.

...

“Some animal maybe?” Selenar muttered back. “Nothing else lives here, right?”

...

Selenar was watching him suspiciously. “How long have you been here?”

--

She raised her eyes to see the same woman who had stood and watched as Hope screamed under the weight of that mountain. “Who’re you?” she asked after a stilted moment and laughter bubbled out from under the woman’s hood.

...

“Chatwin?” Now that drew on her memory. “Like Chatwin’s Torrent?” Once she’d first been able to manage riding on a horse, she and Hope had set out to explore Fillory, taking note of its structures, man-made and not. It was why they’d ended up in the Siren, sailing around to see what happened once they reached the end of the Western Sea.

“The very same,” Jane agreed, her smile flickering and failing. “You should’ve left that monster where you found him.”

Unease gripped Selenar’s heart. “You mean Plover, don’t you?” she asked carefully. “What did he do?”

...

Shame crept up. “I’m not punishing her for not being Io,” she snapped hotly.

Realization glittered in Jane’s eyes and Selenar hated it. “You’re punishing yourself,” she understood. “Why?”

Selenar rubbed at the mark on the inside of her wrist, remembering Elizabeth wailing at her brother’s pyre before turning on Selenar. “Io and Henry had two children,” she said finally. “Ralston and Elizabeth…but Ral had too much of his mother in him and he wanted revenge but I’d promised to look after them.” Her teeth gritted. “I couldn't run off on a quest for vengeance, but Ralston could and he did and he died the same way they had.”

...

“I wasn't the best mother, to either of them,” she admitted, “if I had been…maybe they wouldn't have died so young.”

...

“Yes, maybe,” she sighed, even though the weight on her shoulders felt as though it had eased. “It’s just a strange feeling, you know? Like she’s here but not, which isn't her fault but I just feel…”

...

An annoyed huff burst out of her. “Whose side are you on?”

...

“I recognize the runes carved into his face,” she said after a long moment as Jane returned to her pruning and she only paused briefly. “Queen Morrigan likes to call them ��human barbarism’, the first attempt at achieving immortality, extending life past its limit.”

...

“I have to go,” Selenar managed out, striding away from Jane, but she’d hardly made it more than a few feet, before Jane called out, stalling her where she stood.

--

Selenar’s eyes hardened. “I saw what happened to Plover.”

“Plover? What?” Her eyes slid out of focus briefly and her skin crawled, pressing one hand to her stomach. Stringing any words together, let alone the memory was difficult.

Her friend reached out a hand only to retract it when Hope shied back. “Your clothes are ripped,” Selenar said quietly and Hope looked down at herself.

--

“No one finds entering a battlefield agreeable if they aren't running from something,” she countered just as quietly. “Answer me honestly: why do you want to go to Hy-brasil?”

--

“I told you,” she said in her lilting voice. “Fillory.” She offered him a hand and he took it. “My name is Selenar. I am the Wild Hunt.”

“The Wild Hunt?” he repeated dubiously. “Isn’t that just a story?”

Her mouth twisted into something wry. “That’s what we all become in the end.”

--

"No it’s not," Selenar whacked her with a spoon. "And that didn't even count, it only stalled your heart briefly. Human-made curses don't work on godlings; why else would Flamel not have bothered with one when he went after Iolanthe?"

...

We have a pressing problem, Selenar's voice came, echoing eerily in the silence of their minds.

...

Not necessarily, she said slowly. The constellations might have different names, but the stars are the same.

Really? Marwan and Marina said as one.

Selenar rolled her eyes. It’s called the Otherworld for a reason. It’s more of a different plane of existence than a different world entirely and it’s about as stable as Fillory.

...

Again, Selenar shook her head. The stars are reflected, so whatever constellation Annwn and Earth are linked to, so is Fillory, it will just be a reflection of the stars you know. We just need to find the right ones.

--

Knife-throwing is certainly what she’s skilled at, Selenar conceded, but she found an old rifle and a pistol some months ago that she managed to rework into what she needed. They're actually quite beautiful. Some minor enchantments but for the most part she’s jus’ used her hands.

--

It’s not as though there’s going to be a lot of time, Selenar pointed out. Just ask Bean.

...

When the time comes, you will make sure she goes through the Tree, even if I’m not here, she said.

His eyes widened. Why would you not be here?

Her own were sharp. I think you and I both know, that when you’re hunted, sometimes you need someone to stay behind as a distraction.

Marwan gave a silent sigh. She won’t go without you, he disagreed, I’ve seen how you two are. It’s not going to work if you aren’t here.

It will, Selenar said, steady and certain, if you force her to.

She’s stronger than me!

Not physically, Selenar countered.

You’re the one that taught her to flip someone my size over her back, Marwan disagreed. She absolutely can!

Then I suppose you had best be quick about dragging her through, then, Selenar replied, words flat.

...

We are speaking of gods, not rabid animals, Selenar disagreed. And gods don't like to be spurned. It will get violent, so I need to be sure that you will force her through the Tree, if necessary.

[pitynostars]

ok so first things first, i loooove gatwa's doctor so much already. if nothing else, i love the masterclass in acting he's putting on, his expressiveness is so impressive. he brings a very fun energy to the role

the church on ruby road has me feeling a bit mixed as well. the plot was kind of meh, and i didn't like how in the alternate universe ruby's mum was just so mean without her. it didn't make sense. like what makes ruby so special, hm 🤨 what's this one white blond baby got that all the other babies in the world don't 🤨 i know the point was to show how much ruby meant to her mum, but like. there are other ways to do it than have a complete 180 in characterization.

i'm honestly not super interested in the mystery of ruby's parentage (which apparently seems like it will be a huge thing unless they're just making stuff up to fake us out, in which case, good on them). but i don't want it to be some big reveal i'm sorry 😩 especially not because if it is, people will bend over backwards to say how great storytelling it is when they'd never say that if moffat did a plot like this. i hadn't even considered the possibility really, when i'd first watched it, i thought it's just not that deep, but maybe i'm wrong. the people who are theorizing that ruby is rose and tentoo's daughter are sooo funny though like

ur only saying that because she's blond and we all know nobody on this show can be blond without being related to The Blond(tm) 🙄

that literally means they abandoned their kid. yes. such good parents 😫

i also feel like we didn't....really get to know ruby that well? i'll reserve judgement to give them more time obviously, and millie seems very green (not a judgement on her, and she and ncuti seem to have a lot of fun energy together) so there's still time and there's a lot of time in general for the stories to get going, and it had to do double duty as a christmas special and an intro episode for both new doctor and new companion so like, my feelings may also change with time. anyways those are my thots for now

yesss i was sold on gatwa very quickly i just hope he doesn't become 10th doctor rehash number 2345932853845 i am so tired. give him something new. also praying him and ruby don't have a romance angle there were a couple of moments in CORR i was like. GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOT AGAIN.

CORR plot being meh i agreeee but also xmas specials plot is a lot of times like a wafer and as someone who watched it quite roasted ngl i kinda appreciated it 😂

YEAH omhg tho with ruby disappearing and her mum (i want to say carla??) completely changing as a person??? i get that the point was supposed to be like one little change can make such an impact etc etc as well. but also i was just like. .... ok but what about the other kids wasnt good enuf ???? maybe i'm a cynic lol. but fr have another MORE kids on the wall bc she's trying to fill a gap she doesn't know is from what !!!! IMAGINE.... especially with it being sort of set up as a doctor/companions parallel oh my god

nooo oh my god i know what you mean about rubys parents i like that theyre setting it up as a counter to 13s "it doesn't matter i'm good as i am my past doesnt define me" etc. but i really want it to not be interesting. i want her parents to just be like. normal people who had to make a hard choice lol. oh my god. i just realised. we're gonna go thru a fucking rey star wars arc with her im gonna lose it byee... imagine she ends the series like "im ruby doctor" :) i would quit watching.

but yeah 100% it's gonna be a big thing. atm i dont care but i guess we'll see and hope they do something interesting with it.... prayers she's an alien tbf

rose and tentoo would be terrible parents tbf i said what i said.

YEAH i know what you mean i feel like that about gatwa too i think its hard making the first intro for both an xmas special because it has to be kinda silly and rompy so you cant rlly get too into the grit of the characters?? still reserving judgement on them both, but its taken me a while to warm up to like. everyone in dr who since bill--- wait i take that back i loved bel in flux from like her first scene but she's not a doc or companion.

[metavandetta23]

nobody is going to read this, so I am just gonna put it out there warning: rambling from some fucking guy ever. you have been warned.

life sucks, blah blah blah, but instead of just complaning about that, how about I give you bit explenation as to why. so sit down there one of my 121 followers. If anyone of you read that is and not just clicked follow on one art I made and buzzed off (no offense there, just saying.) Okay so you might ask, why now out of sudden i blow like up that. Here is the answer: See, I have been doing creative stuff like, be it art, writing, music or whatever for past..... lets say 4-5 years. As you might guess, some of these ventures didnt pan out in the end. i mean, its given. It happens. Let me mention some of the things I tried over the years. I tried making a homestuck comic on mspa when I first started doing creative stuff. I managed to get pretty far compared to most projects I will mention, but I didnt finish in the end. Why? I got burned out, because I worked on it full non stop. Then I tried having a cool rp campagin session with pals from discord server I known. That ended in tragedy, especially after one of them out of fucking blue, send a fucking gore of dead person. None of us expected this to happen. Earlier I tried music, couldnt do that thing earlier unless you call "music" by swapping midis with shitty piano font. Well, atleast it didnt end up with a gore.

Then I tried working on some ut aus. Did it even work? HAHAHAHAHAHA, what do you think? Ofcourse, not. Didnt peak interest, because I didnt capture interest basically. Anyways this goes on and on. Deltarune au there, some another rp server there and there (one turned into glorified horny rp out of college setting that I tried initially, pal if you are reading this, sorry but this server just sucked ass) I think you might start seeing a pattern here. You would think eventually. That being "Gee meta, thats sure lot of failures, you must have atleast succed one time BIG right?" Haha, no. Okay I did manage to finish some of my stuff but like. really really low bar stuff. so essentially in the eyes for everyone, nothing. See, most of the failures from these projects came from me doing solo. You would think me teaming up with someone would help? Not really, unless I literally pay them money for it, tough fucking luck. Out of 5 years of me doing creative shit, only 4 people helped me out that I recall. they couldnt helped me out for long in the end, but i appreciated for them when they could. all rest of people? Fucking went ghost and then I was left alone, figuring this shit out myself. It isnt fun knowing that you put trust in someone, only in the end to be alone in this in the end. I wish I was so fucking talented, creative, witty or self efficent as the people i asspire to, the artists i admire who make works of artm writers who can write witty, fun but touching stories. I wish I could be at thier level, so I could make great works of art. But atlas, I am not. I dont seek glory or fame, even if it would be nice. No, I just want people to enjoy creating what I make, to feel like I have impact on the world, that people can share with. to make connections with. Look in the end I am just 20 year old guy from europe, that isnt much good at anything, including social life, apperantly. Only thing I am good at is pixel art, but just barely. I am very much uncreative person. and unconfident and rather hopeless one these days, despite how much I try to hide in fake smiles.

I dont have much better way to end this sort of ramble, besides mentioning tobys recent post from spring newslettter and my view on it. "There's times where it feels like your hopes and dreams are simply slipping away from you. That the things you wanted to achieve are floating away from you in the sky while you lie there, fallen in a crater, your wing torn off, never to grow back. Bitterness grows, and you feel like you may never leave the ground again.

But

That's not true.

You can still fly.

Even if you lose a piece of yourself, even if it feels like you can't get up anymore, you can. You can fly with one wing. You can fly without any wings."

Can you really even fly, even if you feel like a part of yourself was torn off? That it happened right before you could even took off. No matter how much you struggle, scream and rage. You can still never to be able to fly like others, much even take off from ground. No matter how much you try. You feel shackled to ground, to the bones of earth. While you look towards as sky, as other people dance in the air beyond your wildest imagination. Its so beautiful, yet so out of your reach. Cries of helps can be heared coming from you from miles in the air. But they all fall on the deaf ears. Or maybe its just out of bliss ignorance? You cant say. You want to join them, join them so badly. To feel like you could finally be a part of something greater. To feel like you could belong somewhere. To be cared. But you just cant. It wasnt meant to be made. Resentment grows inside your soul. As that feeling rots inside you more and more. Part of you wishes this feeling to be gone, to never be felt. But the other part, says otherwise. It wants that liberty desperately, looking with its green eyes at them. Why they? Why not me. Why not me at all!?. You just want what they have yourself. It grows inside you more and more as you allow it to. You eventually consdering tearning off other people wings. Even if you cant ever fly agian, doesnt mean you should be the only who suffer like this right? And why do they deserve to fly, anyway. They would be better off without that, you think. Plus, even in this state. You know you can do this option. To cripple someone, just to make yourself feel better even if its only for a moment. But then you realise. If you ever would reach to that point. Whatever drive you initally, would be just gone. In fear of your insecurities and weakness. You decide to lie up, instead. Rendering your shackled and vulerable. Locked inside, with no way or out. Perhpas in the end.... Its better if you dont fly at all...

[bluevelvet-room]

PERSONA 3 RELOAD TRAILER SPOILERS AHEAD

as promised, i am typing up my thoughts about reload with in depth discussion on the 2 most recent trailers. i'll put that in a read more - but before that, a disclaimer: first of all, these are my own thoughts and opinions and i will not be debating anyone about anything subjective i say. second of all, i'm only discussing the most recent 2 trailers because the other ones make me unreasonably angry so i might be missing stuff. anyways.

as a persona 3 fan, i havent necessarily been excited about reload for so many reasons i wont really be going into, but these new trailers have given me some amount of hope, and i will just be mostly ignoring the glaring issues.

some things almost definitely confirmed by the two most recent trailers as well as the demo they had at the sega event the other day:

3 physical attack types confirmed to still be in the game. this is a good thing

kouha and eiha have been added to the light and dark skill set, but no evidence of nuke or psy. this is an okay thing (im glad no nuke or psy - they have no real place in the game. but i dont necessarily think that ken and koro needed to deal damage because theyre both op as shit anyways if you build them right) (this might need fact checking, but i saw several people saying it, so)

despite prior claims, there is in fact fes content in reload. "the answer" may not be in it, but there IS fes content. so it's less original persona 3 as claimed and more the journey without the answer, fes edition. we know this for certain because a fes/portable exclusive scene is shown in the character trailer (mitsuru calling the cops because she thinks junpei's room has been burgled, as seen in the hidden cameras, an fes/portable exclusive feature)

new outfits that have been affectionately dubbed "tacticool" by my brother, and i will be using that phrasing to refer to it from now on. tacticool outfits are not an immediate addition - the old armbands do exist in the game for some amount of time. from trailer analysis, i've concluded that SEES switches to the tacticool outfits after fuuka joins but before aigis does, presumably at the same meeting where fuuka is asked to join. tacticool outfits standardly include the new armband, which is uniquely numbered to each character - minato is 3, and i've been able to catch junpei's number as 5. if anyone can figure out the other numbers, let me know i'm so curious. they also include a new coat and 3 magazine clips, which (speculatively) probably mean an evoker upgrade at the same time, possibly to be able to shoot shadows - though i'm not sure how well this would work as bullets would be pierce damage and almost entirely defeat the point of ever using aigis

we got clips of the additional male teammate "scenes", which i'm very excited about. it's confirmed they wont be social links, but they will have moments with minato, which is all i've ever wanted.

the demo apparently includes a version of baton pass, which is. fine. sure. i can deal with that

new ost/battle music which i am withholding judgment on until i can hear the full thing

dlc outfits - p4 uniform, p5 uniform, and phantom thieves outfits which look ugly as hell on the persona 3 characters and do not match the vibes at all thanks atlus. why does junpei still wear his hat

when a battle ends with an all out attack, the initiating character gets an end screen like in persona 5. we've only seen minato's thus far, though

TACTICOOL OUTFITS - IN DEPTH

now imagine if you will that i spent like an hour watching a two minute trailer because i care about these outfits so hard so i am going to describe my thoughts about them in so much detail

as i said earlier i think these come hand in hand with some sort of evoker mechanic upgrade/change, and theyre only introduced after fuuka

if i had to guess, the armbands are numbered with mitsuru as 1, akihiko 2, minato 3, yukari 4, junpei 5, and so on

they all have SHEATHES for their weapons which is sick as hell as well as everyone wearing some form of glove which is also sick as hell!!!

mitsuru has a cape. this is the most amazing thing that could have ever happened ever, and i support her in her cape endeavors

fuuka has a tactical poncho and headset (probably to make it more clear how she's speaking to everyone), but no clear evidence of having an armband. if she did have one, i'm pretty sure it'd be covered up by her poncho, so ??? but it's it's possible that only the fighting members of SEES get the new armband

ken with the oversized coat is so sick. i cannot even begin to stress how cool i think this 10 year old is. atlus was like would you like the world's sickest 10 year old with a sick ass coat and im EATING IT UP

if i think of more things i will reblog this post or make a new post idk i just needed to get the Melting Brain out. i hope everyone enjoys these ramblings and gains something out of it

[lanatusnebula]

I Want To Like Aeolus

I'm going to type "Helios" because I played a fan translated version of the game so I could avoid the eng voice actors. (I refuse to buy anything else Capcom releases related to Megaman because I physically own most of this stuff anyway LOL)

So, so good points about Helios;

he has a cool head on his shoulders (deisgn-wise)

he had model H (my favorite MMZ character is Harpuia and ZX I love Model H big)

I like his face and hair! It's super silly but the more I look at it, the more he reminds me of SOMEONE I can't actually put my finger on. It's funny. And he has... one earring? Hanging off the ear mechanic things? Not sure what to call them... audio enhancement device? Vestibular Enhancement Piece? I wish they got some nerd to official label the reploid/cyborg body parts...

He's pretty neat in that regard, haha!

Model H is super fun in ZX! I enjoyed it in ZX. In ZX it is my favorite! So good on him that he's a biomatch for pocket Harpuia.

--

From here downward i will slander Helios's name and everything he will ever stand for.

nb4, "dude if you dont like him, then ignore his existence like you do with everything else you dont like" bro you dont understand this is a struggle i must endure for the sake of my own completeness (self-torture)

This whole this is biased and abandoned by reason, but I will put on a brave face and embarass myself anyway...! ò 0 ó

Points to touch on;

his design

his writing

his personality

biomatching with Model H

background

moveset

Design

I hate his design so freakin much. He has a sleeveless vest (ok), the weird skin-tight extra padding (sure) a skirt attached to ABSOLUTELY NOTHING (ok) and PANTS (dress pants). Each of these things on a character in the Z series would be like "eh whatever". But looking at how everyone else dresses, I always wondered "what happened HERE???". I'm hoping that it was a mistranslation of the concept art to the official marketed stuff, and they added volume to the skirt when it was supposed to be attached to the torso piece. I just can't mentally comprehend his layers otherwise? Like I'm picturing he and Ciel had the same thing going on, except he has dress pants instead of tights.

I'm more than aware that fashion in the Z/ZX series is a bit unhinged and abnormal. That it might even be lore related or somehow touched on by the fact that every human is a cyborg. Maybe he's a reploid and we can't see it? I'm holding onto the hope that Atlas and Helios are reploids who hide this fact. (Unlikely)

His Writing

Because I am an ugly Harpuia fan, I was expecting more than the game actually gave. This section is my personal gripes that have no real basis for complaints. They are, as a whole, completely unnecessary and ignorable.

Siarnaq has a backstory that is briefly mentioned in his little disk thing. Okay!

Thetis has some sort of motivation that hints that something else could be there, but doesn't have a backstory in in the disk thing. Okay!

Atlas has a backstory that is briefly mentioned in her little disk thing. Okay! (she has been ruined by the fanart in select places and thus she does not exist to me LOL - same with Ashe tbh)

Helios has... a shallower motivation than even Thetis *and* lacks a backstory. I mean, sure I guess? I am biased towards Thetis because I figured for a reploid to have that much of an interest in oceans - something *happened*. It isn't even suggested that anything did happen, it's just... a good set up for me to fart out fandom crap. But Helios... I... man.

Man.

"Everything is imperfect and full of foolish fools I will kill everyone." His personality is so god damn bland. Harpuia was the highlighted guardian for most of the MMZ games and I ended up really enjoying how he evolved and how he struggled in the drama CDs. There was a lot to work with! Part of me thinks, "yes well Fefnir had jack shit going for him and you'd die for him". I DIG HIS DESIGN A REALLY LOT. But THIS GUY I simply struggle with! I want to like him because bootleg model H biomatch but I got nothing to workmwith! And that frustrates me. :(

Bland personality (I like Death the Kid ffs), shit motivation, no background - I know this is grounds for "blank slate, do what you want" but I just don't operate like that for this guy specifically.

His Personality

This section is biased.

Helios's personality doesn't really go beyond "I am a pretentious snob." He has... four lines? Maybe? I can recall four instances of dialogue off the top of my head.

"I don't have time for this lol"

"Fuck you, you imperfect crackhead" (I played as Grey).

"Fuck everyone on this planet for being imperfect."

"Self sacrifice is beautiful for friendship."

Maybe I can work with these? They are not obviously direct quotes, and are obviously played up for the hahateehee, but... I dunno man. It Should be enough to work with but I can't get into mindset of doing something with it.

Biomatching With Model H

This one is a little tricky. I assumed the biometals were either broken, muted somehow, or ditched by whatever personalities lived within them. Model Z kinda suggests to me that it IS the original inside of the biometal, but it's pure speculation based on a few lines.

I understandnthe relations some of the MegaMen have with their biometles, right

Atlas is powerhungry, which can loosely be connected to Fefnir in a very idiot way

Thetis has a "childlike innocence with attached cruelty" that we can poke ourselves in the eyes and say Leviathan had. Also ice water go brr

Siarnaq is a freaky little somethin ninja who is the complete opposite of what we assume Phantom is like based on the extremely limited dialogue he gives us. (but is substantially more to work with than what Helios gives us)

For Helios, we have to accept the "pompous homogeneous ruler mentality" as Harpuia's link. Which I don't get. What is the point of the entire Z series then? Aren't we supposed to look at Harpuia's growth and go "oh he actually is dedicated to his cause but was stuck in some muddy circumstances"? He had pride, absolutely (thinking about his post-repairs in Z3) but it's such a small part of who I thought he was personally? Granted, I did not write the game. I have no say in this; pride could have been his very essence. I just thought it was... justice.

We can say Helios is very much connected to justice - that he feels there is a sense of justice in nuking the flawed beings off this planet. (which is somewhat skewed by the fact that humans get bot'd after a while - what age? 13??? - and are basically cyborgs or robots themselves. So in a sense, they're already leaving behind their imperfect bodies) But... the super secret ending - the fact that he is present AT ALL makes no sense. If the goal is to put an emphasis on human bodies in the future, then... why is Helios present for this? Humans are the epitome of imperfection - we know this. It's blatant. It's why they do these mechanical enhancements to begin with.

Helios can't even commit to a cause right? I know all the MegaMen are exceedingly braindead and that's cool. But at least the others COMMIT to it. Thetis doesn't go "I'm gonna eliminate an entire race for the ocean" and then piss in the sea. Atlas doesn't go "Power is everything." and then break down crying and throwing away her biometal to embrace her weakness. Siarnaq doesnt go "HYPERFOCUSING ON TASK AT HAND" and then hold hands with everyone at the amusement park with a smile. THEY COMMIT.

Helios is stupid. He doesn't commit. Not if that is the truest ending leading up to this ZXC they planned.

His Background

Helios has no background. Okay. That is fine. Thetis doesn't have one either. Two focusing on the present and two focusing on the past.

But what could his background have been? Aristocrat? Poor? Feral child? Living in squalor? No parents? Abusive parents? Was he training to be one of the Sage Trinity? Albert came out of nowhere right? Maybe anyone qualifies - clearly they don't do background checks on anyone.

Maybe he was a sword enthusiast? Maybe the sword plays a part in this? Maybe he idolizes Thomas and felt his methods weren't extreme enough? I feel like the sword is very important to him as a character.

But why didn't they elaborate? They spent so much time making the Floating Islands a Shit Stage and Ouroboros absolutely mind breaking they didn't think to go "maybe we should add a line about his sword that he never actually uses." Are the writers andnstage designers different people? I don't actually know. Might be in the credits. Sure doesn't feel like it in ZXA.

His Moveset

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

why is model zx's reach so short

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[qquicksllver]

so I was at the disaster of a concert that was Fall Out Boy in Somerset this past Thursday and it was truly the most chaotic concert I've ever been too in my life. Everything was fine up until BMTH finished (incredible set btw my first time seeing them after being a few for quite a few years) when a storm hit and the venue was evacuated. We made it back to our car just before it started downpouring and was constantly refreshing social media for about an hour and half.. losing all hope it was going to continue. Then at like 10:30 pm people outside around us started cheering and I knew immediately what it meant. So we all ran to gates. The venue tried to rescan our tickets but the show had already started with half the crowd stuck behind the gates. So they let us all in anyway. Running to the stage singing "love from the otherside" was magical ngl. a core memory unlocked. We pushed our way through the crowd to the pit by the time the Phoenix started (we had pit tickets dont come for me). While I'm upset I didn't get to hear my favorite songs (disloyal order and Hum hallelujah) I'm so grateful to have heard fame < infamy live for the first time ever!!!!!!!! Incredible! Im glad they were able to at least play some sort of show for us. I hadn't seen them in 9 years so I was looking forward to this for the whole year, but mother nature had other plans I guess.