#anyways friend if u respond & i don't just know that i'm abt to go to bed & i promise i'll reply when i get up
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another day another "applying the concept 'disposability' to 'someone withdraws from a personal relationship, & that wasn't signed off on by the other'" kill me
#literal acknowledged interpersonal abuse Needing to be ''mediated'' (implicit premise of preserving that relationship >>>)#and if the victim doesn't participate they're treating their abusive partner / abusive relationship as ''disposable''#like in what meaningful way. getting away from an abuser is ''disposing'' of them like imprisonment / killing From A State?#dropping an abusive relationship is ''disposing'' of it? like uh yeah i sure hope it is#this is always Vaguely Applied to ''ppl don't want to HANDLE CONFLICTS or DO THE WORK'' & then connected to political actions#like well someone's just a bad person In The World / All Things if they stopped being my friend and i don't know why#like of course that Can Be good faith. it's a personal business#but if someone ghosts you and you truly don't know why Yeah maybe there's something going on but like okay let them go#if they want to do that for reasons you don't think are Compelling or they just aren't interested / putting in that Effort then like#what Friendship is really being lost here. but then tweet about it with no context & a zillion ppl like SO TRUE kys randos#[fart reverb Conflict Is Not Abuse] standard abuse apologetics which are easy & a zillion ppl go SO TRUE b/c It's Abuse Culture#someone HAS to Answer My Texts / Calls / In Person Confrontations As A Bold Clearsighted Political Actor are you kidding#someone really doesn't. even if you Really are like ''and i'm not even consciously malicious'' what a high bar#one gazillion abusive parents will tell you And My Estranged Child Won't Even Tell Me Why / Doesn't Have Any Good Reasons / Won't Talk....#what am i supposed to doooo i'm at a losssss And Really I'm The Victim#''i want to break up'' / ''okay i don't :) let's talk through Your Feelings :) [waffle around until insisting on Same Access To Person]''#someone can rescind interpersonal access to themself For Any / No Reason. on a dime no explanation necessary. for god's sake#and friendship is not actually some magically pure & Neutral relationship either. same things#anyway just unfollowed some rando for their thread spinning off a vague qrt ''ppl are so AFRAID OF CONFRONTATION they unfriend u''#going on & on abt how You Need To Put In The Work & Effort & You're Just Probably A Bad Person Otherwise & Disposability like#the disposability is my three points wastebasket toss. death via the state =/= someone won't talk to you. can we be at all serious#every day i reach out further like aplatonic people [some emblem gesture] lovelessness [same] help me#thinking of a Good Tweet i saw abt framing everything re: interactions with others around Consideration first & foremost#wildly enough the way you treat people doesn't need to have Fundamental Assumptions re: like ah Friendship / Community / Love / Family &ccc#how do you treat a stranger. how do you treat someone who you don't personally like &/or vice versa. how do you treat ppl you don't Meet.#it's all so vague it could mean Anything but a) often hints towards [abuse victims are framed as Bad Political Actors]#& b) then that's what people read into & respond to for sure lol#as ever ''oh everyone's just little bitches who can't handle any discomfort. yes; this was prompted by my being discomfited''#wait yeah lol i did not Confront this stranger to try to Posit this to them in twttr's character limit; just unfollowed. disposability smh
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𝔄 𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔯𝔱𝔣𝔢𝔩𝔱 𝔰𝔪𝔦𝔩𝔢 ❦
❦ warning lollipop chaos ahead! proceed with caution… ❦ light angst , happy ending , ex getō suguru , tattoo artist suguru , set in a tattoo parlour , soft dom geto , praise , cunnilingus , masochism , light sadism & impact play , ig semi public and i guessss office sex
the descriptions of this tattoo experience is not accurate, i dunno shit abt tattoos (even tho i rlly wanna get one). so don't bite my fucking dick off with the technicalities! lets just b happy that i acc posted this hehehe
word count ; 5k ish
black fem reader (still all can read)
lollipopliccer’s love letter ❦ … hiiiii lollipops 🪷 i just wanted to say thank u sm for the love on my debut fic i rlly appreciated it. i’m rlly excited for y’all to read this new one EEEEE. this one was also long as helllll (¬_¬), shit has just been ridiculous in my life rn so sorry abt the delay, i don’t even know y it took me this long just to write 5k ugh anywayyy. i’m excited, cus i always eat up geto tattoo artist head-cannons, mmmm they’re just so mm mm mm tasty. anyway this is my first time writing some angst, i usually stay clear away from any typa angst, i’ve already got enough of that in my life plss haahaa, i don’t even know what possessed me to dip my toe in it, but don’t worry it’s very light. okayy enough of the babble, pls enjoy my fic, and i’d appreciate all ur interaction, reposts, comments, feedback blah blah… mwah mwah mwah ( ੭ ˘ ³˘)੭°。⋆♡‧₊˚
'i'm so excitteedddd' you squeal, as your best friend nobara parks her car, beside the tattoo parlor. you both had been planning your tattoos together for a few weeks now settling on the most beautiful matching heart design on both your bikini lines, whilst individually having unique patterns going through the (tatted) hearts.
"you better not fucking scream when you're actually under the gun" nobara chastises laughing.
"fuck you bitch, you already know i'm bad like that, not even gonna flinch" you taunt, as you both get out of her car.
you decided on wearing a fitted, short black dress, that accentuated your curves and hips but would also be easily manoeuvrable for your tattoo placement. shoko Ieiri your tattoo artist made sure you were comfortable with your design and placement.
underneath your dress, you wore bikini bottoms with side ties, for the same reasons as the dress - paired with some white trainers with pink embellishments. you complete your outfit with jewellery. including your pandora bracelet with silver and pink charms, a necklace, and stud earrings.
you both walk into the parlour, it's decorated all over its dark blue walls with a myriad of paintings, sketches, and different artworks. nobara leads you to the front desk as she had booked the appointment. you're greeted by a raven-haired girl with a short pixie cut.
"hey, are you guys here for your appointment?" she asks, as you notice her name tag- 'maki', and her tattoos and scars peeking through her top.
"yeah, um we had an appointment for 6:30 pm" nobara states, you can see her start to blush at maki.
"cool, yeah i'll check that out for you, umm..." maki responds
nobara so obviously interested in maki, decides to flirt, while you absent-mindedly look at the artwork placed across the shop. it's truly captivating, the deep dark hues and colours, so beautifully drawn, depicting what you could only describe as demons. they were more abstract than the stereotypical depiction, but these works somehow gave more meaning and conveyed more torment.
"so how long have you been working here, maki right?" nobara asks
"yeah, i started some months ago."
"that's cool, i love your tats”
“thank you, i um did some of em myself, nobara right?” maki responds getting nobara’s name from the booked appointment slot
“yeah…” nobara smiles shyly
“…are those your sketches up there? nobara asks, pointing to one of the sketches you've been staring at, there's a familiarity to the work displayed. but you can't put your finger on it.
"no um that's actually from another tattoo artist's, geto." maki answers.
you almost freeze, just from the mention of his name "who?!"
"uhh geto suguru, he owns the place, his artwork is all over these walls" maki responds to you.
a shiver runs up your spine "oh..."
"on that note, i'm sorry for the inconvenience girls, but shoko, your tattooist she had to take our other colleague gojo to the hospital- broke his arm doing some dumb shit. so she won't be able to actually give you your tattoo’s today, however we're able to swap her in for geto suguru, he just got back into town and is just as talented"
"shit" nobara turns to you, already knowing the issue from just his name alone, "yn i had no idea omg, i should've checked better, we can leave"
"nah there'll be no need for that, right yn?" you hear his voice. his silky deep voice, it always had that raspy quality that made your knees go weak. another shiver runs down your spine. you whip around.
"why tf are you here?" you sneer.
"uhh i work here…" he answers deadpan.
you turn back around, after giving him a lethal sneer, "hey um maki is there any other artist today?"
"no, i'm sorry, everyone else is booked." she apologises
"and anyway, it'll be a hassle for you guys if you were to reschedule," geto states
you simply stare at nobara refusing to even glance at him.
"come on yn" geto insists gently, leaning closer to you. your back to him. your name on his lips has you reeling, how softly he calls to you, like no other.
nobara waits for what you want to do, and if you're comfortable being tattooed by your ex in such an intimate area?
"let's get this done", you tell nobara, you turn around to face geto who has that enticing smirk.
as you follow him to his workspace, nobara hangs back reassured that you're comfortable being with your ex. you get the chance to truly take him in since last you saw him. his tattoo’s have grown, as he's painted a whole-sleeved dragon across his left arm, slithering out of his tight-fitted black t. your eyes roam all over his body, soaking in his confident stride, his height, taller than you remember. the way he ties part of his black, luscious hair in the bun is similar but different from the way you remember, leaving the rest of his hair to hang past his shoulders. but his right-hand tattoo is as you remember. a rose’s stem covered in thorns, wrapped around his hand, you can't help but still have your heart swell from that.
as he opens the door for you, you strut past him in silence, he of course responds with an eye roll to your petulance. his workspace is decorated with more of his works, some unfinished, yet so mesmerising you can't look away from them, they seem to depict a greater depth, too intimate for the outer world. the deep hues of dark royal blues, blacks, and green meld together, casting an otherworldly aura. the demons here have this eerie elegance, their features subtly tormenting, evoking such sorrows.
"if you're not comfortable with me tattooing you, we don't have to, i will let you reschedule free of charge-" "i know." you state, without hesitation. and with that, the silence returns as geto smiles slightly, he then grabs his equipment, lining them up, his needle gun, ink, etc.
"why did you insist on me not rescheduling then?" you taunt
"i wouldn't say i instisted" geto defends.
"mmm really? cus i'd even say you implored" you smirk. seeing you smile… he wonders how he could’ve forgotten how magnetic it is.
"i just wanted to see you…”
a pause.
"you broke up with me." you interrupt coldly, both of you are reminded of your separation...
… you begged him to stay. the pain you felt completely consumed you, leaving you empty…
geto holds your gaze. your eyes filled with anger, but also longing. you try to conceal your feelings by turning around.
"yn..." he calls out to you, but you ignore him, seemingly too entranced by a random splotch on the wall, while trying to hold it all in "...yn look at me", geto approached.
you turned around slowly. almost stubbornly, you made sure to look him in his eyes, those deep dark orbs that never failed to suck you into a world of intensity and sensitivity. you both hold each other's gaze, so much said between each other, longing, and regret.
"i am sorry yn, i-" in his attempt to express his apology, you immediately stride past to sit on the tattoo bed, too overwhelmed.
"-right so like from a scale of 1-10, 10 being i'm gonna need to b fucking sedated, how painful is this tat going to be" you ramble, trying to divert the conversation.
you ignore his sigh, as he walks to his chair. he then chooses to focus on preparing his equipment, sterilising them, all that shit. "the tattoo shouldn't be that painful, especially as you requested numbing cream."
"cool" you respond curtly, you follow his actions on focusing on the task at hand, and lift up the side of your dress, to expose the side you were getting tatted on.
when geto looks back he sees your pink bikini bottoms with string ties, he looks away trying to keep his composure "just want you to give me an idea where you want your heart and thorns”.
you clear your throat a little, to try and calm your nerves, “um just around here, i trust your um artistic inclinations. have some freedom with it, i know its kinda simple but i um- the thorns i want them to wrap around, please.”
“of course, yn”
geto trying his best to make this experience as comfortable as possible begins applying the numbing cream. he looks you in your eyes, to see if there were any remaining apprehensions, finding none, the gun comes to life.
“you tell me how you’re feeling throughout this process, if anything feels off with what i am doing, you tell me, do you understand?” geto instructs, his firmness, and apprehension to cause you any unnecessary harm stirs things in you. things you’ve tried repressing, tried to move on from, evidently unsuccessfully.
you nod in response adding a “yes”. and so begins the process, as geto brings needle to skin, his art begins to mark you. the initial twitch of pain you feel is subdued by the numbing cream generously applied. although you can’t help the slight yelp that falls from your lips, which geto catches onto and immediately soothes “shhh it’s okay, the cream will kick in soon won’t feel a thing hun”. his words soothe you, as they always used to, leading you to simply whimper in slight pain. you can’t help but look at him, at how he’s completely focused on your brown skin, that he marks by his hands.
…
as the hours go on, you slowly see geto’s work, his art come together, the red hues of the heart mixing together with slight pinks but also contrasted shades of black, to provide it with such depth, teasing the later depictions of darkness the thorns will add. you are in complete awe of this man, of his work, as you watch him work completely zoned in, despite any dull pain mumbling under the numbing cream.
as your focus lays on him- memories, old feelings of pain, sadness, and confusion begin to bubble again, and you blurt…
“why did you leave?”
a pause…
followed by silence… your demand for answers hanging over you both, while he still remains focused on your tattoo, you remain waiting. you know he heard you.
“i found myself in darkness again, yn, but that time it was even more challenging.. my hallucinations, my night terrors all came back, i was in it deep…” he pauses trying to find his words, and you give him that space “… i knew you were there for me, holding me when i woke up screaming. you stood by me…” he paused
“…however i couldn’t let you do that, i couldn’t bring you there with me. not when i couldn’t wear a heartfelt smile in this world. i needed to find myself again, my purpose. and i know the way i left you, was cold, and confusing, and i am truly sorry, but i had to do it for myself.” as you listen attentively, watching him intently, he slowly gazes at you, pausing his work. your eyes meet with such intensity, such ache, and you start welling up, finally understanding everything, no longer being left with nothing but a cold departure.
“i’m sorry- m’so- ‘m so so sorry geto” tears cascade down your face, geto is quick to wipe them away, softly holding your precious face.
“sshh, ssh baby, don’t be silly mmm, you did nothing wrong, and i’ve been doing better. so much better. finding new channels to express how i feel, what i see.” referring to the intricate art that decorated his walls.
you sniffle, you feel so guilty and ashamed, for the resentment you harboured against him when he was out there trying to fight his way out of such a dark mental space. “they’re beautiful.” you sniffle
“not a day goes by that i don’t think about you, that i don’t regret the way i left. i would’ve come back but i thought you would move on...”
“i didn’t.” you respond
“neither did i.”
with your admissions to one another, a comforting silence fell, filling the room with sweet serenity, and you both found yourselves tethered together once again, holding each other’s gaze, filled with yearning.
you were the first to break, averting your gaze, feeling like it was the first time meeting, how your butterflies bloomed and fluttered, riddled with carnal hunger for him. the paradox of your feelings for him always consumed you, almost driving you mad, only geto could set you so ablaze.
the needle resumed its course, mechanically piercing your skin. both your attentions returned to their original positions.
the only difference being the shift in the atmosphere, the reignition of your feelings for one another, but this time at a tenfold from the time spent apart, wanting no other.
“ahh it’s getting a little sore geto” you whine in slight pain
“sorry yn, we’re moving onto the thorns now, we’ll soon be done, why don’t you take a look at it for me, tell if you don’t like anything?”
as he wipes over the completed heart, filled with colours and dimensions, so deep and beautiful, truly depicting more than you could imagine, it’s medium-sized maintaining a slight cuteness to the art, but still depicts chaos within, which geto clearly understood about you, and so was best to depict it.
“i love it.” you squeal, looking into his eyes, as he looks for reassurance from you. his vibrant smile brightens his face, you hadn’t seen it in so long, and it warmed you.
“good, we’re going to move to the thorns, wrapped down your thigh, why don’t you tell me about your choice of thrones?” geto asked so he could understand your thought process behind the tattoo.
you were apprehensive to reveal your thorns, largely from a place of embarrassment. you didn’t want to show how much he had affected you, and still did, but you did not want to lie to him especially after, he revealed himself so intimately to you.
the thorns, um, i got them from you…” geto halts at this, looking at you in slight confusion “they stemmed from me just wanting to have a piece of you still with me, something that i remembered, that reminded me of you… the thorns, the ones you have on your rose.” in explaining, you feel bold enough to touch the inked rose on his right hand, grazing your fingers over the thorns
suguru can hardly conceal his feelings. “i missed you.” geto states. his dark, sleek eyes told you how he burned for you.
“i missed you too suguru.” you whisper. your feelings flood your body, making you tingly- his intensity holds you in place. you’re both focussed on one another, suguru begins to smile feeling the warmth of your fingers touching him so delicately.
"lets continue your tattoo, i don't wanna fuck it up" suguru states, slowly bringing his hand away from your touch, even though he wanted nothing more than to let you touch him all over. to feel how those pretty acrylics, decorated in bows and charms along his skin, but he didn't want to mess this up, he wanted to tattoo you perfectly.
"okay" you respond, almost dissapointedly. wanting to feel him under your fingertips. you'd settle for now to feel his hands on your thighs, holding them to get his angles right, you were beginning to realise that you wanted more than just to stroke his hand. you want him to mark you all over, with more than just his needle gun.
"you've gotta try and stay still for me yn, i know it hurts, but it'll be over soon" suguru soothed, as his eyes narrowed around the curves of your thighs, the way they flexed and trembled slightly as you whimpered due to the numbed pain.
"okay... can i hold onto you?" you ask. he responds with a nod. you grip his arm, wanting to feel tethered- you don't remember him being so well-built, his biceps feel thick and powerful, almost hard to the touch as he flexes per his movements.
...
you're now a few hours into the tattoo, suguru’s taking his time, to add such beautiful details. the tension between the two of you is palpable, but the air is no longer filled with animosity, but rather intimacy. knowing you though, and how impatient you are suguru already sees it coming when you-
"sug i'm fucking borreeddd" the numbing cream obviously doing its job to reduce the pain to something dismissible, suguru chuckles finding your impatience so familial and adorable.
"it's barely been two hours" suguru forever sassy, remarks, rolling his eyes at ur moodiness. "now stay still, you're messin up my work." suguru states, you huff and bite your tongue, as you don’t want to fuck up his flow, you already know he works best when he’s zoned-in on a task.
you decide to catch up with him, your curiosity building, you've both missed so much from each other's lives. "i like your parlour. i would've bet money you'd turn your art into tattoos, you were too talented to let your art hide in your sketches"
suguru smiles again, "yeah? it was either this or burning down the town", he jokes and makes you both laugh, due to the absurdity. however, you both knew, there was some truth to it, which honestly added to your laughs
"right, of course committing arson, and potential mass murder is an obvious alternative." you sarcastically quip
"what you don't agree, i know you're not much better at keeping your chaos in check," he teases, his eyes locking onto yours.
you feel yourself flush, feeling seen- so you try staying on track to your original plan to catch up with him, "when did you open this place?"
"well actually gojo was the one who invested in my passion"
"that's so sweet"
"yeah, he's a fucking asshole, always all up in my business," he remarks, with a small smile, feigning annoyance. you can feel the fondness behind his words.
you notice how suguru smiles, how he teases, just like he used to, & still has that assertive and confident allure to him, that natural dominance and assuredness in himself, that he almost lost. your conversation with one another continued, bantering off one another. you make each other laugh and snicker and your heart can’t help but swell.
...
your feelings for him set aflame once again. this time with a ferocity you could barely contain. only heightened by the dull pain that he controlled with his needle, marking you so prettily. the assured control suguru had over your body was so seductive, it made places other than your tatted thigh, start to ache, start to ache so badly.
finally, geto lays the finishing touches on your tattoo, clearing up the intricate lines, adding shadings and highlights, and then wiping over the tattoo.
"okay, it's done. you can go check it in the mirror, let me know if you hate it." geto keeping his gaze low somewhat anxious to see your reaction.
as you approach the full-body mirror attached to the opposite wall, you couldn't possibly understand his apprehension because when you lay eyes on your tattoo, you are completely awestruck. you fall completely in love with his markings, the way the thorns pierce through the heart and sliver down your left hip, and thigh, wrapping them gorgeously.
you are lost for words, your lips part with a gasp, and when you bring your eyes up onto suguru through the mirror, you see how he watches you. following from your thighs decorated in his work, marking your body so seductively. then he focuses on how your dress is bunched up on those hips, those hips he’s held, and soothed over for hours today, but his mind wanders... reminiscing about all those times he used to handle and caress all over your plump thighs. how he would mould your body any way he pleased.
he watched as you held the undone ties of your pretty bikini bottoms, it made him salivate. his eyes cast over your dress- the way it hugged your body so exquisitely, propping up your boobs so prettily. the way your butt peaks out of the bunched-up dress, and how your breathing picked up, flustered from his heated gaze.
"i love it sug." you whisper softly.
"yeah?" he smirks. growing bolder, he walks up to you, and you don’t dare avert your eyes from his, through the mirror. you love the way his top hugs his thick muscular shoulders. his broad upper back being so beautifully emphasised, and how his sculpted chest has his nipple piercings teasing through his top. you salivate at his slim waist. ugh he's such a slut. you love the way his body is perfectly decorated in his art, marking his skin; and adorning his arms, and his neck, which is wrapped with a chain, you remember gifting him.
when he reaches you, he has to crouch down, flexing his strong thighs and calves hidden under his baggy bottoms, but you still have to look up at him to maintain eye contact, which he demands with his own. suguru holds the bottom of your thigh just under where the tattoo ends.
"how does it feel?" he whispers into your ear, his sharp gaze still honed on you
you whimper faintly because of the dull sting and ache from the tat
"a little sore sug, but it feels good, i really like it." you say softly while you lean into him, wanting to be wrapped in his body, his warmth.
he smiles at your admission "that's good yn, i'm going to wrap it up now, don't want it getting infected." you love the way he says your name, the way he purrs, your name rolls off his tongue so tenderly.
as he wraps the tattoo you wince, he immediately soothes you, "i've got you baby, it's okay." your body relaxes in response. your eyes never leave each other. as the tension shifts you feel enthralled, wanting him to touch you all over.
"yn, do you want me to play with you?" suguru asks, having that condescending tone that never failed to make you falter. you almost shy away, but he holds your face, bringing his hand up under your chin, his fingers grip your cheeks slightly, making you look directly at him “i want to play with you, i want to help you forgive me baby...” he whispers into your ear. your breath becoming more uneven and flustered from his proximity, that you can practically taste his aroma, how he mixes his scents of minty, smoky notes and cinnamon, woody undertones - it intoxicates you.
“…do you want me to?”
geto waits for your response, not daring to touch you the way he wants, without knowing you’re aching for it. and you want nothing more than that, for him to take care of you how he once did, oh how you wanted to see if he still remembered how to make you cum so blissfully. you nod giving out a soft “please”.
suguru kisses the side of your head, sprinkling kisses down your face making you giggle and fawn, till he reaches your neck and you lose your breath. geto finds the sensitive parts on your neck, making you feel so tingly, it's almost ticklish. you almost forgot how much you loved when suguru kissed and licked across your neck, how he would bite and suckle, leaving you all marked up just how he liked. god he’d go fucking crazy for it too. to hear you whine and pant below him as he licked and sucked. it sent tingles all over your body, straight to your clit. you shuddered under him, leaning onto him- to give him better access to mark you. slowly he grips your hips grinding his bulge into you, he even bends you forward a little so that you can feel him, how hard he is for you- humping into you over your clothed body.
geto held you at an angle arched while both of you stood in front of the mirror so that he could have you grind right back onto his dick that was growing so achingly hard for you. the way he moved your bodies together was so disgustingly sensual, you had to look away moaning as you felt his clothed dick thrust into you, giving you that sensation you so craved. you were whining, you felt so depraved like you hadn’t been touched like this in so long- you just wanted him to rip you the fuck open.
“mmm nah baby look at yourself in the mirror…” he demanded, to which you stubbornly ignored, forcing suguru to grab your face so that you could look at how pathetically you had come undone for him, just from his dry humping. “… i said fucking look at yourself, mmm? you lost your manners baby?” he teases knowing exactly how to fix your attitude. he ends his command by giving your thigh (without the tattoo) a firm slap, making you cry out, you quickly try stifling it, remembering you’re still in his fucking workspace.
“you’re so mean” you whine and pout up at him, which makes him chuckle at you, his smirk unfurling so lewdly.
“i’m going to make it up to you mmm? you’ll let me make you feel good baby? gotta apologise for making my baby upset.” the way he talks to you feigning that concern, his fucking tone, makes you feel weak, and pliant for him. as you move your legs a little wider, and let go of your tied bikini bottoms so they hang down barely concealing a thing. geto watches how strings of your arousal are built up, clinging onto your pretty bottoms. showing him just how wet you are for him and you push your butt into him even more, nodding your head in invitation for him to remedy all the mess he’s made.
as suguru brings his rose-covered hand down to your aching pussy ready to soothe it. once he touches her, feeling your glistening folds, he hisses as his eyes glaze over, and lower so seductively. you see the way his hand flexes and his veins protrude. his long, adept fingers dip further, caressing and rubbing against your hard little clit. he can feel it pulse for him, making you whine as suguru increases the pressure of his fingers on your clit. circling around your throbbing bundle of nerves. his fingers collect the slick past your lips, down to your spasming, weeping hole, and brings them back to your needy nub.
his tight circles, pet your pretty clit so well, turning you into a mewling mess, you can’t help but move against and around his fingers, acting so bratty- but suguru couldn't give a shit, he'll mould you right where he needs you again holding you by your neck and continuing his strokes on that clit regardless of how you whine.
"sug- aaa-" such a petulant whine leaves your supple lips, begging for him to go further into your leaking hole, you needed him to be inside you, having your pussy drool on his pretty, tatted fingers.
"i know baby, you need it don't you? you need me to fuck you open mmm?" suguru whispers in your ear, kissing the outside of your earlobe so delicately, while saying such filthy things. you look at him through the mirror nodding your head so pathetically, and why would he deny you, his baby? nah never...
suguru brings his finger back down to your desperate hole. he eases around your pussy going around the edges of her, only dipping the tip of his finger. you can't take his teasing-
"sugu! stop teasin-" suguru immediately interrupts, plunging his fingers into you, making you gasp. he slipped into your soppy pussy giving off that mind-numbing squelching sound, having your pussy suck his fingers in so snuggly, has you moaning wantonly. the way suguru’s digits fill you, he’s able to add a finger, scissoring two fingers into your weeping cunt, the way he pushes in and curls his fingers to rub against your plush walls it has you mewling. as you feel him find and rub against that spot, that perfect spongey spot so easily, your eyes roll back. suguru was losing his mind, he rasped a soft moan right into your ear, he loved watching you buck on his fingers, the way you moaned and struggled to take him, it made him itch and drool to have you.
his fingers in your pussy stroking and pumping into your soft, wet pussy. his hand around your neck holding your face up to keep your eyes on everything he was doing. his deep, velvety voice right by your ear, whispering, and moaning sweet nothings. you were losing your fucking mind, you almost couldn't handle it.
"aaa- nngg, sug- sug!," you moaned shamelessly "f-ohfuck i can't-"
"sshh baby, tf you think you're doing mmm, whining like that in my office?" suguru whispers chastising you. your eyes look up at him, and the way you looked so doe-eyed, so pathetic- barely able to hold in your moans, gripped him.
"you struggling to take it for me baby, want me stop?" geto taunts, but you instantly shake your head needing him all over you.
“no please don’t stop sug”
"you can take what i give you princess?"
"i need you uhahh" you wanted him to have you however he pleased.
the way he moves has you humping and panting, you wine on him trying to get some friction against your slutty little cunt.
your moans grow louder and the pitch of your whines grow higher- you suck on your pretty fingers to try and get yourself quiet, your eyes glazing over as you watch suguru fuck you so good with his fingers and his hard bulge pushing up into you. the way he licks and bites all over your neck leaving a trail of his marks. suguru still never averts his dark eyes from yours. the purple glints in his eyes kind of sparkle in your head. all of it is bringing you right to the edge. your eyes roll back, your thighs shake, your knees buckle from the pleasure. so pliant and easy for him to manoeuvre you so he can hold you up and fuck you in just the right angles he needs, that he demands.
“fuckfuckfuc- aahh ohhhh sugie. daddy oh mmynghh” you whine and cry, your head lolling onto his shoulder.
right on the precipice of your orgasm, suguru watches how you get so close to cumming, he’s fucking salivating seeing how you become so undone, how you’ve gone fucking dumb on just his fingers, he can’t help but moan and groan right with you.
“mmm mmfuck, mine. mine.” he purrs, licking all up on you
but all too soon, it comes to a halt, and your orgasm gets snatched away from you. suguru wickedly decides to take his fingers out of you. you almost cry
“wha- no suguru fuck no don’t stop, mmmmnoo” you whine so pathetically gripping his arm, it’s fucking laughable trying to keep his fingers right where you needed them, gripping his sculpted arms so hard. your hands… the size difference makes him smile. no not smile, he’s fucking smirking. that little shit.
“fuck you, SUG HMPH!” you practically stomp your feet, pushing him away as you’re about to walk away, but of course suguru grips you against him, pulling you back so close, you are still as stubborn as ever refusing to look at him, while you’re face to face, which makes him snicker. he isn’t having any of that bullshit tho, he grabs your chin and cheeks squeezing as a warning. he pulls your face up to him again and kisses you on your forehead, the side of your head, and your cheek, and then he ghosts his plump, nude lips over your lips.
“if i decide you don’t get to cum on my fingers, you won’t. i don’t fucking care how close you are.” suguru states, locking his eyes with yours so intensely, while his lips and breath feel so close to your own, you almost feel faint. you want nothing more than for him to just kiss you, you want to feel his lips again, oh how you miss how soft they were, how you loved the taste of his mouth, the taste of the mint with his own unique feel.
suguru’s eyes flutter down to look at your lips so lushly plump and glossed he can’t help but lick his lips. he wants nothing more than to mess up your brown and pink lip combo. to bite, suck and lick all over you.
“tell me you understand.”
“i understand daddy, m’sorry i threw a tantrum, i just wanted to cum on your fingers so bad-”
suguru smiles feeling fucking delighted from your admission
“-can you please kiss me, i promise i’ll behave sugie” you whisper almost whining at the end, you rub your thighs together feeling how you made such a mess for him, as your slick trickles down your thighs.
suguru feeling so pleased with you, groans into your mouth, once your lips touch. he almost forgot how much he missed this. how much he missed you, your lips, those soft lips that melted against his. he loved the way you gasped and whined from your slow kiss, so sensual and intimate. but he knew you were such an impatient brat, his impatient princess.
demanding more, you lace your hands into his hair. you adored his long, luscious hair so much, (that you remember countless times joking about shaving it off at night and turning it into a wig. those playful moments would always have you both bickering and laughing together. it makes your heart swell remembering this).
you begged for more by stroking and tugging at the nape of his hair, making his body tingle, as suguru moaned into your kiss. he licked on your lips to get you to open up for him. he loves the way you whine and moan from frustration and neediness while running your fingers through his hair, it made him lose his fucking mind, so, of course, he had to express that by nipping at your bottom lip. his bite made you whimper and grind up against him but it wasn’t enough. you needed more. you wanted more. but suguru leads the kiss to hold that slow, deep and sensual pace, having your tongues dance together, lick against each other unhurried. which was mind-blowing but also so frustrating you wanted to just devour him, you couldn't get enough.
you moaned into his mouth as suguru sucked on your bottom lip, and then went back to your tongue, licking against each other. he spat in your mouth briefly separating your mouths from one another, and immediately resuming the kiss. at this, you snapped. whining wantonly, you gripped onto him and stubbornly clambered onto him so your legs wrapped around his waist. suguru was easily able to carry you. you were determined to make him fuck you.
“daddy” you whisper, opening your eyes to pout up at him.
“yes baby?” suguru answers, giving little kisses along your chin down to your neck. sucking onto your sensitive neck areas, he knew just the right spots to make you lose your fucking mind.
“i want you to fuck me…” you say grinding down onto the bulge you could feel through his sweats. you were sure you could feel a wet spot on them, but you weren’t quite sure of the culprit, as your wet pussy dragged and humped on his dick print leaking with pre-cum. you could feel his throbbing dick just aching to be inside you, pumping you full of his cum. suguru hissed from the feeling of your mess teasing his aching cock.
“… please baby, please fuck me again, i said i’d be good” you whined, moving closer to his ears so only he could hear how desperate you were for him. suguru moans, his voice breaks and rasps a little from you grinding on him and circling over his dick.
suguru fucking snaps, he closes his eyes while his mouth slightly hangs open, just taking in how your hips wined on him while he carried you.
he then cupped your face to him, “you’re such a fucking brat.” he moans, holding your face and caressing your throat, he watches how your breathing picks up, as you get so flustered. he brings you close, kissing you on your forearm, bringing his hand around your neck. then he carries you to his tattoo bed.
“i am not going to fuck you yn-.”
“-but su!” you begin to whine interrupting him
“be quiet.” suguru reprimands, gripping your neck just a little tighter after placing you to sit on the edge of the seat “i’m not gonna fuck you on my dick. when i have you like that, it’s gonna be on my bed, where i can have you screaming on it without any fucking interruptions. do whatever the fuck i wanna do without you getting all shy on me tryna muffle those pretty moans from me mmm, you understand baby?”
“yeah daddy” you answer feeling so giddy and light with him
“there’s my princess,” he smirks, “you’re really that fucking needy, want my dick here, right where my colleagues are downstairs mmm?” he says before kissing you again. “good girl” he praises while lifting off your dress and quickly bringing his lips back onto yours. slowly he brings you to lay back. he gets in between your thighs lifting one up over his shoulder while letting your tatted thigh rest over the edge of the bed. from this angle he could see your pretty glistening pussy, clenching around nothing.
“lay back baby.” he instructs, he sees how you wait in anticipation for him laying back on the bed.
he crouches down, kneeling in front of your exposed pussy, your slick brown lips he’s completely hypnotised by, they glisten from your wetness. you grow a little shy, you weren’t prepared to be eaten out today (૮꒰⸝⸝> <⸝⸝꒱ა). you bring down your hands to try and cover her up, feeling a little embarrassed.
suguru immediately dismissing your nonsense, and swats your hand away bringing them to instead hold your plush thighs “don’t piss me off today yn, it’s fucking mine.” you almost squeal in response to suguru, he gets so intense sometimes.
suguru is completely enchanted by your scent, the way your hole quivers and weeps for him he has to have a taste. keeping his eyes on you suguru takes the time to separate your folds with his fingers, he licks your swollen nub revelling in the way you gasp and twitch from the sensation, you feel so sensitive from the way his fingers had you shacking.
he then delves in, lapping and sucking on your bud making you writhe and moan from pleasure. the movement of his tongue has such an effect on your pussy, it's marvelling. he takes his time, really getting you sensitive, flattening his tongue on your clit and then straightening it to add pressure, circling perfectly around your bundle of nerves, it makes you gasp and arch your back so prettily
“fuck! sug-daddy aaaahhh” you release a raspy cry, gripping his hair and pulling him into you to, so you can grind on his face, which makes him moan into you, muffling a-
“fuck baby” into your wet pussy, he has to hold your hips down as you begin moving around too much for him to control, so he holds your thigh and places his other arm on your hip, pushing you down, so you stay fucking still for him to play with you properly. suguru brings his tongue down to your leaking hole, thrusting his pointed tongue into your pussy making you mewl and cover your mouth to stop yourself from squealing.
the way you’re panting and moaning, suguru can tell you're going dumb for him, aching to cum all over him. he takes his mouth off of you as your moans get higher. you whine from the absence of his tongue on your needy pussy but he makes up for it by spitting on her, letting his spit slide onto your sensitive cunt. the way his spit glistens and slides down your pussy, he pushes it back into your hole, thrusting his fingers and spit back into you. you react by clutching your thighs together from the sensitivity which makes suguru look at you sharply.
“open.”
you whine, separating your thighs, so he can dip his head back down onto your clit which makes you shudder, bucking your hips into his face. he continues thrusting his fingers into you while his tongue plays and toys with your sore little clit. you can feel everything, it's all so much, your eyes roll back as your mouth hangs open letting out a broken moan while you tug at suguru’s hair.
the way his fingers scissor your folds open, cunt drooling and sucking him in greedily, while he laps and lightly nips on your clit letting his spit drool on you, just for him to suck on your juices. he eats so sloppily it has your eyes watering.
“s’good sug—so fuckin’ good,” hips grinding into the movement of his lengthy fingers, chasing that ecstasy knotting in the pits of your stomach, you’re so close you start seeing white, suguru knows you’re about to cum from the way your fingers tangle and tug at his hair, struggling to either push him closer or away from you. his dark piercing gaze never leaves your face.
“daddy m’gonna cum! shit hah aa sug please lemme cum oh please” you sob, which makes suguru groan into your pussy. feeling the way your hole clenches around his fingers, leaking out so much wetness. the way your hard clit throbs for him, your juices covering, adorning his beautiful face, he looks so pussy drunk. the only thing on his mind is making you cum all over him.
“mmm baby, you gonna cum for me.. that’s my good fucking girl” he says pumping his fingers into you while moving his other hand to circle your clit in tight circles, so he can talk you through your orgasm.
“oh fuck daddy! oh my godnngh” your hands immediately grip suguru’s hands as you squeal and moan wantonly. your body arches and bucks as you dig your nails into him leaving little crescents on his skin. your vision dots, as your body tenses, lips parting into a silent scream as your release flies through you, wetting the tattoo bed. suguru watches your cream flow beneath you, all over his mouth. he pushes your juices back into your leaking hole, drooling at the way your hole squelches.
“there’s my good girl, oh you did so good baby mmmm” he praises lapping at your excess juices spilling down, you’re so fucking sensitive it hurts
“sug-ahh it hurts, fuckk” you whine, purring up at him as you watch suguru’s desire envelop you, you can tell he’s not done with you, but you doubt you could even take anymore.
suguru slithers up to you, kissing and licking up your boobs, making you squirm. when he reaches you he holds your face so gently, mere inches away from you.
“you forgive me baby?” suguru whispers gently stroking his nose against yours, almost purring against you like a cat “mmmm?” he purrs stroking the side of your face and caressing your limp exhausted body. you feel so warm against him, so lewd and yet so protected.
“i forgive you, you’re such an asshole” you giggle feeling a little shy again, only suguru was able to make you shy, and flush so easily. suguru whispers back a thank you and captures your lips into a searing kiss, melting you both together so passionately. you clutch onto the nape of his neck and run your fingers through his hair, earning you a moan, as suguru’s tongue dances with yours sensually. he grips your hips, pulling you against him. you can feel his bulge pulsing for you-
“suguru, aye we’re back! and u’ve got another appointment waiting!” you both hear from downstairs at the reception, shoko calling out to suguru followed by gojo following suit making a ruckus, throwing a tantrum about his arm
“dudeee, where tf r u? i coulda died!” gojo shouts out. you can hear him coming up the stairs to suguru’s office
“mmm fuck suguru, they’re coming up” you gasp up to suguru who still refuses to take notice of them. he smirks, choosing to still feel all up on you
“mmmm don’t care c’mere” suguru states, you roll your eyes
“suguruuu c’mon” you smirk, pushing against him
“ugghh for fucksake” suguru huffs moving off of you, taking your hand and pulling you up to him making you yelp with excitement. you both come to your senses though when you hear gojo’s footsteps up the stairs getting close, both of you scrambling to put your dress back on and get you both presentable.
suguru then holds your chin, so you both look at each other
“what?” you nervously laugh at his intense look
“let me take you out yn? i’ve missed you so much baby” suguru pleads while stroking the side of your cheek with his thumb
“mmmm i dunno sug, dependdss on where you’re gonna take me” you smirk up at him
“let me worry about that baby, i wanna treat you, try and make it up to you” suguru implores and then kisses your forehead just as gojo barges in-
“sUgUruUuu!!”
♡ ༺。° .ᘛ𓆩♡𓆪ᘚ. ° 。༻
#geto suguru#geto x reader#suguru smut#jujitsu kaisen#black reader#jjk smut#jjk suguru#getou suguru x reader#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jjk fic#jjk#jjk geto#geto smut#suguru geto smut#geto suguru smut#suguru x reader#suguru x you#suguru x y/n#masochist sub#soft sadist#tattoo artist suguru#daddy geto#jjk angst#angst with a happy ending#light angst#geto#daddy k!nk
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@ THE ANON THAT SENT ME THE ASK ABOUT THE YOI DISCORD AND WHERE EVERYONE IS I'M SORRY I WAS RESPONDING AND THEN I NEEDED TO GO DO SMTH ELSE SO I CLICKED SAVE AS DRAFT AND TUMBLR ATE THE ASK...... orz
anyway here's the link to the discord!!
and as for where everyone is, i definitely don't know about every person that's currently active in the fandom, but here's some of my lovely yoi friends/myoots and other blogs i follow that i think you should check out (in no particular order)!!
@arom-antix @alexseanchai @jewishvitya + art blog @rikichie @blended-ice @moonlightseve @roserelease + art blog @rosereleasestheart @linneakou @lines-on-ice @blonndiec @okidokiokami or yoi-specific @okamionice @imjustapoorwayfaringgeek @justletmeremember @fishyskates @maetae2288 @rhapeseuhans @katsuki-nikiforov @rikeijo @korruptbrekker @yoi-incorrect-quotes @viktuuri-week @yuri-on-ice-action
sorry for spamming y'all with the tag it was just the easiest way to link your blogs lol hope it's ok (lmk if u want me to remove u)!!!
also i definitely forgot people and for some reason couldn't tag some people even if i did remember them (apparently they don't exist lmao? insert joke abt tumblr being a functioning website/app) so pls don't take this as an exhaustive or definitive list in any way!! i'm just a little adhd creecher trying to help someone find their way to the yoi fandom 🙇
#neptalks#the ghost talkshow#well technically. i DID want to respond to the actual ask but alas...... i was betrayed. foiled yet again by tumblr dot corn#yoi#yuri on ice#just in case sb in the tag also needs this
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I like hearing ppl infodump n u seem like a cool bean. would u be willing to talk abt shou from mp100(?) a bit with just a lil context added in for someone who only has a passing familiarity with the show. side note: plural mob be based
SLAMS DOWN ON TABLE. Before I get into this I want to say this is not a Serizawa hate post. Because I am reading what I wrote and it sounds like it at points. It is not. I was writing what I think Shou feels about him. I love Serizawa and I love them being friends, this is me talking about Shou having complicated feelings about his trauma. Okay? Okay.
Okay okay so. Shou is the son of a guy who tried to take over the world, and his entire life was spent trying to stop him. And then someone did. Someone stopped Claw. His dad got locked up. And Shous whole life had been built around trying to stop him, he had zero time for anything else other than occasionally visiting his mom (who left when he was a kid. We don't know what happened. We don't know if she tried to take Shou with or not. All we know is that Shou kept her presence hidden from his dad. We don't know how Shou feels about his mom or if he lives with her after his dad gets locked up. We know he had adults who were also rebelling in claw (the organization his dad ran), and he seemed to trust them a lot. I like to imagine they're a weird family and like. I imagine there's some Shit there. I like to imagine at least one of them was kinda giving up on everything, not really caring one way or another about what happened to everyone because they're just. Done. But then this wide eyed idealist of a kid comes by and he wants to stop his dad, holy shit the boss has a kid, and the kid is taking all this on himself. Maybe they didn't think they could fix anything but they had to save this kid. Did they believe Toichiro could be stopped at all? What were they like? We don't know much about them. How many of them were just in it to protect the kid? In hopes that maybe that idealistic, weird little boy that stumbled over to them would come out of this still a good person? God. I'm sorry I'm emo about found family. Don't mind me.
And I'm just. Okay. Okay. I think so much about how we get to know what other claw members are up to after everything, but...not Shou. Besides in fan books and stage plays, we uh. We got very little. And that makes him very interesting to analyze.
I just. Always think about how Serizawa stopped Shou from hurting Toichiro and how Serizawa got a happier life. Does Shou ever resent Serizawa? I think so much about their potential claw dynamic. Maybe he was one of the few who was kind to him, but was so disgustingly *loyal* to his dad it made him feel sick to look at. Serizawa would bring him snacks if he looked upset but would always respond to any criticisms of his father with the same unwavering Faith in him. Serizawa would comfort him after he lost a training session, Serizawa shielded the man who hurt him the most. Serizawa was a victim, Serizawa turned a blind eye to him. He needed to save Serizawa, and Serizawa never saved him. Did he feel responsible for Serizawa?
I think he felt like it was his responsibility as Toichiro's son to be the one to stop him. He needed to save everyone. He needed to make things right. He wanted his dad to go back to being who he was before things got really bad. I feel like. At first, Toichiro was an okay dad. And that's why it hurt so bad when everything went to shit and he started being so fucking horrible. Because Shou knew he was fully fucking capable of not sucking and he CHOSE to treat them like this anyway. He couldn't recognize him. He was a stranger with his dad's face and he had no idea what he did. Did he ever think if he could just fix Toichiro his mom would come back? Everything would go back to normal if he could just make Toichiro be a good person again? How long did that thought last?
I just. I always think about how aimless Shou strikes me as being the few times we see him in season three. He doesn't know what to do now. He had this whole purpose and plan. And then it didn't work. He didn't stop his dad. Mob did. His dad's alive. His dad changed his mind, but he's arrested. His mom and dad aren't together. Everything feels like it's tied up in a neat little bow for everyone except for Shou.
Of course we know that's not the case, but Shou doesn't know. Shou doesn't know that Serizawa was fucking panicked about disobeying Reigen even when their lives depended on it, Shou doesn't know that Mob's haunted by that battle. So from his eyes, it's very likely that he thinks he's the only one who hasn't moved on.
He goes from being always so dramatic sounding in all his lines in s1 and 2 to in season three just sounding...so much less? I don't know how to describe it. He sounds so much less...well. Everything was over for him, y'know? He built his whole life around carefully avoiding his dad and saving everyone and being the hero and then. Everything's done, and he didn't have a plan for what he'd do after. It all seemed like the end of Everything, and that'd be it! Nothing after that. But it's all over and he still has to live. Now what? Now what does he do?
How is Serizawa a functioning adult with a JOB now? Minegeshi joined when they were a teenager, how are they just...okay now? How did everyone, EVERYONE else get to move on, but Shou couldn't? Everyone else got their nice little ending, and Shou has nowhere to go. Does he tell his mom everything? That his dad tried to kill him but suddenly decided fine okay murder is wrong now, not soon enough to never have done that to him? Does he ask if he can stay with her? Will his lackeys want anything to do with him? Will Ritsu Everything's done and nothing's over, not for Shou, but everyone just fucking moved on. Everyone seems to be a better person than him now. Everyone seems to be fine in a way Shou just isn't.
Not to get back on my Shou and Serizawa bullshit but. Do you ever think about Shou seeing him again. And having no fucking clue what to think. Serizawa is just ...fine now. Suddenly he's no longer the guy who trailed after his dad and did horrible things for his dad without a THOUGHT. Suddenly he's smart and responsible now. Suddenly he's soooo good now. Where was all that when he needed it? Where was this functional, kind guy when he was TWELVE and trying to stop fucking terrorists. Where was this guy he would've done ANYTHING to have on his side when he was trying to save everyone from the man who raised him. Where was he. Why did he change now. Why had EVERYONE changed now. Why was Minegeshi trying for Mob, not Shou. Why was Serizawa trying for Mob, not Shou. Why was Toichiro trying for Mob, not Shou. Why didn't he MATTER. Why had NO ONE cared that he was in hell, that he wanted things to be okay. What's that one line. "If [Serizawa/Toichiro] has truly changed, it means he was ALWAYS capable of change. It means that I just wasn't worth changing for." And like. Objectively that's not what happened, objectively there were other factors and Serizawa and Toichiro are on very different levels, but Shou is like. Barely thirteen. He's BARELY thirteen. He is a child and all he's gonna see is that nobody cared when he needed them to. And now he's lost and has no idea what to do and everyone's just fine. Like he didn't almost die. Like his dad didn't try to kill him. Like he wasn't in hell for twelve goddamn years. Like he hadn't tried to save everyone. He's thirteen. He's not handling this well.
I feel like he just. Has no clue how to be normal. He doesn't know who he is now. He doesn't know what to do. His whole life orbited around stopping his dad and now his dad is different and locked up and he can't see him all the time, and things were so much worse back then so why does everything feel worse now. He doesn't know who he is now. He doesn't know what he wants now. I think so much about he says hes never using his powers again. Is he just trying SO hard to be normal. That's what he decided he wants now. He wants to be a normal kid who has friends and that's the only way to do it. He didn't have a Reigen in his life who'd tell him like he told Mob that powers are just another attribute. Maybe one day he'll talk to his lackeys, and maybe they'll hold him and tell him that that's his choice but that his powers aren't a curse or a weapon, they're just a *trait.* Or maybe he won't. I don't know. It's just so fucking. God. Shou, man. Shou.
Maybe one day he comes to spirits and such for Ritsu and sees Serizawa. Maybe they fight. Maybe they don't. Maybe they'll talk. It's just. God. Shou has so many loose ends in his life. Is he just trying to leave claw behind by never using his powers again, like he might think everyone else did? He went from "I need to save the world" to "I need to be a normal person." Did he shave his hair to look normal or did he shave it after he had a long talk with a friend that made him reevaluate things. What happened to him. If he has the spirits and such crew still, maybe he'll end up realizing that his powers are just another part of him. Maybe he'll realize they're not a curse or another thing his dad shoved on him. God. Aughhh. Sorry for being ill about Shou and possibly ooc about him but. Aughh.
Once again this is not an anti Serizawa post. I love Serizawa. Shou however probably has some Issues and I like to address them and try to give him more closure. Because I love him. Again, sorry if this is ooc, I'm still trying to get a grasp on him. If anyone who has a better grasp on him wants to add anything PLEASE let me know. I do not fully understand this guy yet but I would love to try to
#mp100#mp100 spoilers#shou suzuki#suzuki shou#shou and serizawa tag#join me in my shou has complicated feelings on serizawa agenda#and also shou has complicated feelings on mob agenda#and shou has complicated feelings on toichiro agenda#tw abuse#candyskiez asks#candy meta
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Hi! Sorry for randomly dropping anon into ur inbox, but I’m kind of in love with ur oc’s and I was wondering if you could tell me more abt Ilya? Ik u said they’re just some guy from Penn state and for some reason that really intrigues me lol.
Never apologize I love anons and I'm so flattered you like my little guys. Also sorry this is gonna take a minute and there will be many typos cause I'm typing one handed on my laptop while eating an icecream/my cat tries to steal my icecream bar, not that you needed that info
ANYWAY litte recap on Ilya:
22 years old
5'5
he/they, transman
youngest of 4, has all sisters
Played for Penn State
Now plays for Olympic Court
Goalie
Number 7
I haven't decided on what he majored in yet
Yeah he really is just some guy. He's the only athlete really in his family. One of his older sisters ran track in high school, but otherwise their family is full of musician. Dad is a middle school orchestra teacher, mom is a music professor, his sisters all went into the arts. He can play a, quite frankly, ridiculous amount of instruments and he enjoys them all but he's not particularly passionate about it.
His parents signed him up for little league exy because he saw exy on the tv once and wouldn't shut up about it/was begging them to play. His parents just wanted all of their kids to be happy so they caved very quickly and Ilya developed an intense passion for the sport that obviously never went away.
Ilya's oldest sister (Liliya) is 7 years older than him, the other one 4 years older (Kateryna or just Kat), and the sister after (Tanya) that only a year and a half older. They're all incredibly close despite any age gaps while also very much having a dynamic of lovingly bullying each other
Ilya kind of always knew he was trans and they were always in a safe space to express it. His parents used to joke that they had "3 girls and an Ilya" and they didn't even bat an eye when as a kid he went straight for the "boys clothes" and asked to be called a prince instead of a princess and only responded to being called a boy. At school it was different, in elementary school other kids didn't care but the teachers could be weird about it, and then as a teen other kids started getting mean about it. But his parents and their sisters were always accepting and they filled their house with enough love that Ilya never thought about being closeted or pretending to be someone he wasn't.
He gets recruited to Penn State's team as their starting goalkeeper as an openly trans athlete. His team's respectful for the most part. There are some people who just don't seem to get it, but they're never outright rude or transphobic to him. There are sometimes snide remarks and something Not Cool said on accident and Ilya is always quick to correct it and most of his teammates are decent enough to apologize and try to do better
And he talks A Lot about being a trans and generally queer athlete. He's happy to be one of those people out and proud for everyone who can't be. Ilya has always, unapologetically, taken up space. Not even focused on his queerness, just in the way he exists as a person. If he's in a room you're going to know he's there and you're probably going to know their every thought as well.
They care a lot and they take everything to heart. They're very much a "don't cry cause you'll make me cry" type of person. He's much more willing to take on people's pain and share their burdens than he probably should be.
And he has zero filter. While he's absolutely paving the way as a queer athlete and he has a lot to say to the press about that his press time also has to be limited because he will just say shit. He has insulted other teams, insulted specific players, shared information that he definitely shouldn't have, said "fuck" on camera too often to keep count, and a lot more. He is keeping the Penn State vs Edgar Allan Ravens twitter discourse alive and well with all the shit that comes out of his mouth
He makes his best friend his junior year. She's a sophomore named Alice and she's a defensive dealer. Her sophomore year she comes as trans, MTF, and Ilya is the first person she tells becuase he's one of the only queer people she knows. After that they're pretty much attached at the hip and Ilya would kill and die for her. Her family isn't super accepting so he takes her home with him for the holidays. His family becomes hers and they're more than happy to add one more girl to the family.
Ilya makes court right after he graduates and it's with Jude, Em, Mara, Florian. you know the drill at this point. They're the ones I never shut up about. And I think I'll largely be repeating myself and I don't want to be annoying with that so we'll stop there
Some other fun things about Ilya though:
he never learned how to ride a bike. he will never ride a bike. fuck no (he fell over and scraped his knee once and despite all the balls to the head playing exy that was his breaking point for some reason and he never got on a bike again)
he's a cat person
he teaches Florian ASL and it's the main they talk to each other cause Florian likes to go nonverbal
they were such a huge fan of Jude it took everything in them to not be starstruck when the two first met
the two instruments they stuck with were the violin and the piano
they have an addiction to strawberries
is almost always playing jazz music on a vinyl when they're home/have people over
he has a shitty autograph and Flor has begged him to "get better handwriting" since he signs so much stuff but he's fine with it being an unreadable disaster (Florian's autograph in comparison is gorgeous)
he is an unapologetic foxes stan after they win finals
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The tacophy deep dive post
Hello, my name's Ozzy, better known as Vandal or TUV. If u know me from this acc you know my biggest ship and main fixation when it comes to the ii fandom is a crackship involving Taco and Trophy. In the past uh 3 or so years that I've been in the fandom I've gotten got knows how many questions and remarks abt how it makes no sense or that they didn't even know it was a thing. And out of sheer boredom, I decided I'm gonna make a deep dive post abt the ship.
the post will be in the following order
1: characters themselves
2: why i think they could be buddies
3: their flaws, the ppl they hurt and why that plays into one another
4: just general silly shit i wanna add cuz its relevant
Who are these weird little dudes??
Ur not living under a rock you KNOW who Taco and Trophy are, but here i wanna talk a bit about their personalities.
As we all know, taco is very very fucking smart, she was able to hide her actual personality for an entire season of show. While her motive for her behavior isn't known as of writing this post, we know there's definitely some amount of reason behind it.
She's not above playing dirty or flat out killing people to get what she wants, casualties are just a part of it, they're technically immortal so long Mephone is around anyway. Her morals seem beyond fucked, caring about people supposedly but not being against using them for whatever personal goal she may have.
Despite this, if we know one thing about her its that being reminded of her mistakes and what she has done can very quickly set her off or make her upset.
But the basics, in summary, are that she has little regard for others and how what she does affects them until its too late. She's arrogant, yet smart and tactful which makes her such a threat.
And then there's trophy, who in contrast is a lot stupider in terms of his behavior and motives. Again, we don't know his reasoning behind doing what he does, other than just wanting to be better than others.
He's to put it bluntly, a fucking asshole, just for the sake of why not. Making people do things for him purely because he himself does not want to do it, manipulative in his own way. While actual attempted murder isn't something he would do, he clearly isn't above breaking a few laws if u so much as piss him off like with knife and his doll.
Outside of that/after he was eliminated he seems to have calmed down a bit, he likes photography and probably learned to find something else to do other than antagonize people for funsies.
He of course is arrogant as well, but his lack of motivation to do things himself doesn't make him that big of a threat, especially if the thing he's using against you is just normal to others.
why could they be friends? [How they meet hc I guess]
So why do I think they could get along ? Ngl I'm gonna have to put a bit of headcanons in here but it makes sense I promise.
We all know Trophy likes photography right? Well what place on the ii map :tm: would have great photo potential? The forest.
I imagine that one day, Trophy goes to the forest to take photos and whatnot [a little bit before the episode where lb and tt go back in time I'd say.] As he walks around taking photos of things, he manages to bump into taco after she [embarrassingly] falls out of a tree [mirroring her falling when hit with the gemory] and falls in a bush in-front of him. He'd be a bit shocked, cuz what the fuck just happened and wouldn't really respond until she asks if he's just going to keep standing there as she's trying to get unstuck. When he snaps out of it he picks her up to get her out and places her down. Taco, having watched the show closely, knows who he is and initially wanted to use him alongside Microphone until remembering he was eliminated and therefore would be a little bit useless. He meanwhile starts asking who she is, irritating her a lot as she did NOT get shamed on show for people to not know who she is.
The two don't actually bond in this first interaction, that comes a few days or so later when Trophy, again, finds her in the forest. This time he basically just asks her if she can find cool places he can take photos of, which does annoy her a bit but if it means he'll go away sure. This repeats a few times until she, reluctantly, gets attached.
Other stuff ig is i think they could bond over their past mistakes, a bit far fetched but hey, a boy can dream.
Their sins and whatnot
Lets talk abt their sins and what they could bond over in that regard
Taco: killed a few people, manipulation, trying to steal money, probably kidnapping with mepad
Trophy: bullying, blackmail, manipulation
I also think its interesting to note that the people they hurt have a bond with one another. Knife and pickle are buddies, Knife and Mic are buddies and we know Mic cut the bs and pointed out her behavior towards Pickle, its likely those 2 are going to become friends as well. their victims realistically can bond over these experiences.
The people they hurt and the influence they have could play into their conversations. While Trophy has done way less, he still hurt people. Them being able to bond over the past, the things they did and how to handle that guilt would be sweet.
filler i mean other stuff
Here goes other random shit i think would be funny or just mostly hcs/vague stuff that has no real evidence
Justin has confirmed Taco can fit in his head[like the cup part], largely why i tend to draw her just...in there.
i think they bond over a shared hatred of Knife
Trophy likes tea, she likes tea, let them drink tea together
i hc both were extremely ''trapped'' during their childhoods. Taco was babied to hell and back while Trophy was expected to be perfect, causing their respective ways of lashing out. A lack of freedom in both.
This is more an observation but Taco is so fucking short lmfao she can just be grabbed
based on drawings two friends made, i think they'd commit crimes together.
i think Trophy would sneak Taco into the hotel at one point AFTER ii ends to ensure she doesn't have to stay outside all the time.
And thats all for now, folks. So what was i really trying to do with this? well mostly just...rant, i miss being able to talk abt ii2. I might edit this post a bit later, to add more stuff, fix wording, answer questions etc. Tacophy means a lot to me as a ship, even if the only footing it stands on is built out of popsicle sticks and tape. Rarepairs are fun, i've had the occasional person yell at me for shipping this but honestly, its never stopped me. I love seeing people kind of warm up to the idea, even if just showing interest in the dynamic.
If u read this and thought it was neat, pls show it cuz i worked p hard on this. Have a good day :)
#object shows#osc#object show community#inanimate insanity#inanimate insanity fandom#object show#inanimate insanity 2#object show fandom#inanimate insanity taco#ii taco#ii trophy#inanimate insanity trophy#tacophy#ii tacophy#object show ships#inanimate insanity ships
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Fanfic writer asks — 4, 5, and/or 20!
hi!!
4. Share a headcanon about (character name) in (story title)!
left it open not sure if i'm mean 2 do this for one of my own stories or just any story...suppose i will take this opportunity 2 weigh in on the reg birthday debate & say that i see him as a capricorn. could perhaps be convinced of virgo as well...but that boy is not a cancer sorry
5. Is there a tiny detail in one of your fics that you feel goes tragically unnoticed?
not sure if it's something that's been noticed/brought up before but i don't think it has...i love a full circle/mirrored ending moment so in atydsp the very first line is him being awake + the very last line is him falling asleep <3
20. Is there anything about any one of your fics that you have been dying to discuss but haven’t had the chance to?
oooh idk...honestly zar has been getting quite a few voicenotes recently abt different parts of wfrau so there has been quite a bit i've wanted to discuss lol but some of it is just stuff abt the lily interlude + epilogue that i can't talk abt without spoiling...
i guess one thing i've wanted 2 discuss/one thing that's been interesting to see is (again) the way people have responded 2 the whole james/lily/regulus ambiguity...like i know that much of this fandom revolves around shipping etc but sometimes i've just wanted 2 be like it's not happening!!!!!!!! how can i make it more obvious!!!! but then again that's just part of putting ur writing out there in the world like someone can read something & interpret it completely differently than how u expected regardless of what u do...remember one person commented talking abt how they loved the polyamorous rep w james in wfrau & i was baffled bc in my mind i was writing him as aromantic...also was interesting seeing people expecting jegulily bc i thought i'd done a pretty good job writing reg + lily as platonic lol. also has just been interesting in a broader sense to see the different ways people think abt + interpret sex vs romance...like the idea that james enjoys sex but doesn't find it romantic isn't all that crazy to me bc sex & romance don't necessarily go hand in hand in my own life like. sometimes u just hook up for fun u don't have 2 be in love...but for some people those things r very tied together & it's difficult to conceptualize a guy who just wants to sleep w his friends! so that's been interesting 2 discuss...like the whole expectation that where there's sex romance must follow etc...
one other thing i've been wanting to discuss is like. r&s as they currently stand lol sent a whole long voicenote abt this the other day so have already gotten some of it out of my system but. it's interesting again seeing the amount of feedback from people who really wanted them 2 reconcile + have a happy ending at the point where things currently stand/the conclusion of the main story--or who are holding out for a happily ever after, etc. like to be fair their story has changed a lot as i've written it & i didn't know when i started the fic that the main story would end as it has. that being said ever since the obliviation became a key part of the story i've known that r&s simply would not be getting back together after voldemort's defeat...like sirius genuinely does not love remus anymore bc how could he! he doesn't remember him! they're practically strangers! & remus doesn't wanna give sirius another chance bc why would he! after all the hurt he already went through! knowing that the person in front of him now is essentially the guy who killed the person he loved & took his place! or perhaps more accurately is equivalent to the reanimated corpse of the person he loved...came back wrong narrative etc...u get the point (hopefully). anyway it just seemed clear to me that reconciliation would not be in the cards for them & it felt like brushing past that or trying to patch things up would detract from the emotional impact i was going for...perhaps even diminish the depth of the feelings they did, at one point, have for each other--like, it's only because they cared about each other so much that things are so unfix-able now. of course i do have my interlude + epilogue left 2 play around w but also bc i am mean + contrary + like making people sad every comment of someone being like "please make them happy :((" makes me want to not do that lol
& last thing is just a fun detail abt james that i'm not sure if anyone's noticed...putting it under a cut in case anyone wants 2 put the pieces together themself but a fun little detail abt his death:
james's recurring nightmare abt a bright light + his boggart being that bright light was him seeing his own death <3 bc he lost his ability to see color the 'avada kedavra' didn't look green to him; it was just bright light. & that was the last thing he ever saw! fun <3
fic writer ask game
#ask#wfrau#will add that i have had the final scene 4 this epilogue planned almost since i started writing it & it still hasn't changed so. regardless#of reactions/discussions/etc i'm planning 2 stick w my fun original idea <3 for now...#atydsp
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hi
hello internet strangers want to hear about my personal life as per usual
well as those familiar w my lore know my title ix case (us-specific college thing where, tldr, if u get sexually assaulted u can do a little mini court case thru ur school) is finally fucking over + i won . which is awesome. unfortunately the respondent (title ix word for "person who did the assaulting") got preeeetty much no sanctions at all . like literally nothing changed . the lawyer recommended they be moved to the other dorm hall but they couldnt, so basically they got put on probation and that's it. Lmao. which means my situation is WORSE than before i filed the complaint, bc b4 i filed the complaint they were in the other dorm hall, and then they moved to mine. but i can't do shit about it unless i want to take my school to, like, court.
well anyway the respondent's life changed in no meaningful way Except they moved out of the dorms last month by their own choice. i assumed that meant they were embarassed abt what they did But i guess not. Bc they've been getting really into on campus events and hanging out in the central building that i like to hang out at. and its like. okay. whatever.
but the thing is . theyve been going to a lot of queer-centric events recently . and while im the only person whos filed a complaint or won a case against them. i am not the only victim i know that for a fact and the other victim is also a queer person. So can you see why im worried about someone who managed to sexually assault two queer people within the first week of living on campus like, integrating themself into the community like nothing fucking happened
and theres this school dance coming up in a couple weeks and im worried that will give them an opportunity to like. hurt someone else.
and i want people to KNow what they did because i dont feel safe with them on campus anyway but i especially dont feel safe now theyre talking to people and making friends (especially bc most of their friends r like. friends of friends. like i dont know them but i know of them yk) . i dont know what theyre saying about me (if anything) and i especially dont know if theyve hurt anyone else. and they might have! because they demonstrated a frankly dangerous lack of regard for consent repeatedly Like i think this is a genuinely dangerous person, whether by malice or stupidity or both, and i dont want anyone else to get hurt
BUT THE KICKER IS...! well first of all we're bound by a no-contact order (baby version of a restraining order). you cant be in the same classes and you cant talk to each other (irl, online, or thru a 3rd person) the title ix coordinator has provided jack shit about what a no contact order actually entails btw lol 😒. But if i were to tell someone and they went and told that person, idk if that would be considered 3rd party contact, which would get Me in trouble
i also dont know if it would be considered "breaking confidentiality" if i said their name- again, don't know jack shit, don't have documentation of the actual rules i'm supposed to be following. but i really dont feel like this is a safe situation for this person to be on campus with no one knowing what they did
im also just generally worried about them finding out ive told people and getting mad and going to the coordinator and me getting in trouble when the only reason im even considering this is bc, again, the school didnt do jack shit
and i dont even know How i would tell aynone . like im not rly friends with most of these people . i see them around and some of them i think are cool but theyre not friends or really even aquaintences . so it would be fucking weird .
but i dont know what to do and i dont want anyone else to get hurt . and i know thats not on Me, but. i also dont want to sit back and Know. and not say anytthing
#text#sa tw#neg#i really dont know what to do here#and it's so frustrating bc imo i shouldnt have to do anything bc they shouldnt be on campus at all but WHAT EVERRR#🗒️#personal
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celeste I’m dying and need help (this is super fucking long I’m actually so sorry)
so this guy that I’ve been friends with since literally 8th fucking grade likes me and asked me to go out with him but I don’t like him back but I’m too scared to reject him because I’m the type of person to feel AWFUL if I hurt someone’s feelings. Everyone tells me that it’s not my problem and that I shouldn’t feel bad but like I CANT.
I really wished I liked him bc he’s super sweet and literally said he’d buy me sour patch kids and give them to me when we go out (but I feel bad when people buy things/do nice things for me too) and I’ve been trying to give him so many hints by either straight up avoiding him when he asks me out (this is all over text btw) and I also told him “if I wanted sour patch kids, yk id get them myself. plus I feel bad when people buy things for me” and he’s like persistent on it.
and to make it worse, he got rejected by a different girl a few months ago and literally cried. me and my friends (cause he’s in our friend group) were like “comforting him” (basically telling him she wasn’t worth his time bc she was kinda rude abt rejecting him) and stuff like that, so I don’t wanna hurt him again.
he knows I had a toxic ex but doesn’t know the full extent, and bc of that ex, I’ve literally not had a crush since him bc he traumatized me.
anyways I genuinely tried summarizing this super quick but I’m sorry it got so long, I understand if you don’t want to respond/read the whole thing, but if you do then thank you!!! <333 (sorry for any spelling or grammar mistakes I’m just panicking rn and my autocorrect is working overtime)
-‼️
okay i'm gonna give it to u so straight: u gotta bite the bullet man. i get that ur empathetic but think abt this, if u do go out w him your feelings are most likely not going to change. then you'll be stuck, eventually he'll figure out/find out that u don't rlly like him. and it'll be a massive gigantic shit of a mess.
it sucks and it can be a sticky situation but the only way you'll get out of it is by being honest and putting ur foot down so to speak. plus it'll suck for a little while but if he's a good and true friend, he'll eventually move on and you guys will be just Friends again. and you can't be upset abt it forever like actually. you'll feel bad for a little while but eventually your body/mind will do what it needs to and you'll be okay again.
as for going abt it, avoidance neverrrr works in my experience. (been there trust) you have to tell him straight up that u dont want him. and if he is still persistent, then that's a major red flag (also trust me) and u do not want that in ur life.
also also, ppl get hurt unfortunately that is a part of life. if u don't hurt him, someone else will (sounds bad but it's true) and u aren't responsible for other ppl's feelings/how they react. all u can do is live ur truth and look out for no. 1.
anyway i hoped this helped? i am ... not the best at giving advice pertaining to men/guys/boy species without being a bitch abt it but i truly did try to set aside my erm ... dislike to help u. but get other advice too and ultimately go w ur gut (and ur head be logical but not too logical)
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I was tagged by @theangrypomeranian Thanks!!
1. How many works do you have on AO3: 52
2. What's your total word count? 813,389
3. What fandoms do you write for?
atm it's Hunter x Hunter with wips in Over the Garden Wall, Futurama, and Lord of the Rings. I got my start writing Twilight fanfic on fanfiction.net and occasionally write for Star Wars when the mood is right. There are past fandoms, but I don't feel like naming them all.
4. Top 5 fics by kudos:
Okay, there is a problem. Two of my fics that are in my top 5 are also like ptsd for me from a bad fandom, so I am leaving them off this list despite their high kudo count. Right now I have them viewable only to AO3 users and you can't comment on them bc I just don't want to be reminded of them, but also am not strong enough to take them down. So anyway ... here's my edited top 5.
Blame it on the Nargles (Harry Potter)
If You're Lonely, Press Play (Over the Garden Wall)
The One With The Slaps (Friends)
Change Heartache Into Courage (Twilight)
The L Word (Twilight)
5. Do you respond to comments?
I try to unless the comment is kinda unhinged. I once had a really nice comment that switched gears midway thru to start in on a campaign to save the show my fic was based on getting nasty abt the network that canceled it and it just went off the rails, so in my head I was like thank u for that nice beginning but I'm just gonna walk slowly backwards away from this.
6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
Even my saddest fics have some sort of silver lining. I don't like leaving my characters suffering w/o any hope. So probably the AU I wrote to my own otgw canon where I kill Beatrice off (Not) A Happy Story is the angstiest, but there's some hope by the end.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
idk I'm kind of partial to the ending of my iasip fic My Fair Charlie bc these are two characters who have been thru a lot in their lives and the scene in Charlie's room where he shows Dee his memory box is just sorta cute and innocent and gives me feelings.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
In the fandom that shall not be named, I got some. I never got any hate when I originally wrote for Twilight on ff.net but when I updated my fic from there to AO3 I got some.
9. Do you write smut?
Not really no. A handful of times and it's just sorta okay. I'm more of a write an intense lead-up and then fade to black writer. I'll leave the smut to ppl who can actually write it well (ie not me).
10. Do you write crossovers?
No
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yes! It was so weird. There was another Twilight fic that I was writing that I had let sit for a few years and then someone messaged me that it had been stolen, the names changed and put on some anime fanfic website. The person knew bc the name Jasper kept popping up in that person's fic when there was no character named Jasper. They thought that was weird so they googled a portion of the fic and mine came up. Anways, I messaged the site, but who knows if they did anything abt it and anyway, I took that particular fic down since I'm not in the fandom anymore and won't ever finish it.
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
My Twilight fic 'Change Heartache Into Courage' has been translated a few times.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? No. I'm a lone wolf.
14. What's your all time favorite ship?
I mean it changes all the time, but I suppose if you want to know the couple that has the highest word count from me since this is a fanfic meme then that would be Wirt and Beatrice.
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?
I have a 38k 'Dragon Prince' fic that's been sitting since 2021. I'm not in the fandom anymore and got rid of Netflix, so even if I wanted to write my ability to watch the show is hindered. Still, I like the character development I wrote and maybe one day in the future I'll work on it again, but as of now, it's probably going to sit collecting dust for a v long time.
16. What are your writing strengths?
Long inner monologues and flirty, fluffy banter
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
Action, smut, and moving plot forward. I just want these characters to talk, not actually get anything done.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?
Haven't done it
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Created a gender-swapped Aladdin AU when I was 13. Wrote 'Hey Arnold' fic in a HA forum in my teens. Posted my first "official" fanfic (Twilight) to livejournal when I was 28 then moved it over the ff.net midway thru the year and a half it took me to write it.
20. Favorite fic you've ever written?
A Perfect Sonnet bc even tho it's like 8 fics deep into my iylpp universe, I worked really hard to world-build and make it more high fantasy than fluffy slice-of-life stuff like I usually did for them. I'm not sure if I succeeded but I am proud of the effort I made.
I am trying to remember my mutuals who also write fic. Most are barely on tumblr anymore, but I'll tag who I can remember: @justme--emily @trashangel-dee @221bdisneystreet @america-oreosandkitkats @spectraling
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this is so embarrassing <3 but would you happen to maybe possibly have a merlin (2008) fic rec list beloved mutual..... not nearly enough fic writers get it like my beloved mutuals do
i can assure you that is absolutely not even close to as embarrassing as it is to have devoured any and everything the merlin fanfiction world has to offer. i have read aus that you would not believe. i have been subjected to characterisations and headcanons that would make anyone else instantly close the tab. i have read authors with such a poor clumsy grasp of british slang i could weep from embarrassment. yet i persevered. for MONTHS. and here is what me (and beth <3) have managed to scrounge up after all of that. please use everything i've just said as context that we were NOT in our right minds reading these. proceed with caution
tributes - the! hunger! games! fic!!!! iconic legendary spectacular THEE revolutionary turnaround for the merlin fanfiction game and for the horrors generally. do NOT go in overhyped tho me and beth went in like haha what a cool weird au and then it caught us off-guard that it wasn't written terribly. also good for something longer and about much more than just merlin and arthur. it's fr like watching the show again for better and for worse. it's got camp whimsy it's got our main duo acting like complete freaks it's got this constant suffocating sense of inevitable tragedy... slayed!
history books forgot about us and in dreams - by the hunger games writer so u know it's actually written well!! don't read their other stuff tho just trust me. my memory of the first one isn't great but i remember feeling with both that finally FINALLY someone Got the finale like me + beth did. short but just rlly solid satisfying follow-ups to the show.
the court of avalon - freya + arthur best friendism in avalon realest shit ever said!!! makes me go fucking crazy fr. YES this has way too much magic lore bullshit to it and i don't careeee they're my friends.... and FINALLY a proper post-finale fic where they don't just freeze arthur in time for 1500 years...
to the point of fear - slay little mordred character study!!!!
the world i built for you - the disir fix-it!! smth i have always wanted due to being sooooo Normal about that episode (arthur's matrix. if u even care). not perfect but worth a read for sure!!
long title and also long title - i rlly like established relationship fics. sorry for being cringe and boring some crimes can never b forgiven etc.
like clouds in starlight widely spread - ok the rest of these i'm going to copy/paste from my list for beth sorry <3 but if i've already written a little deseription for each one why give myself more work yk. anyway: sad and wistful and A Lot as someone who was about to move out of my hometown when i read this. if i said it chapter two vibes. actually that doesn't mean anything ignore that. at one point arthur goes "are you trying to tell me something?" and merlin responds with, "i'm always trying to tell you something." which uh. he really is huh. it's whatever though.
fundamental imperfection - merlin and arthur as writers, gets their first meeting right (arguing and being dicks, then immediately becoming obsessed with each other). don't remember much else except the sequel is unfinished heavy angst and i cried like three times. don't read that (+ HIGHLY positively peer reviewed by beth. tell us a story about love!!!)
as long as we have we - i know you've read that fake marriage christmas fic which i love a lot (maybe it has problems but it's just so endearing...) and this is the same vibe. or well it's christmas and it's sweet so
(and said xmas fic: no matter how far away you roam <3)
tintagel - i don't know how i feel abt merlin and arthur in this but the parallels made to ygraine and nimueh are just too insanity inducing to ignore. my price is my life yours is to bear witness.... they wrote that in 2009!!!! insane
ok that's a lot + it's the best merlin ff has to offer. which is still not that great but. enjoy!! + b thankful you do not have to go into the hellscape that is the merlin ao3 tag...
kingdoms - i have no memory of this tbh but i wrote 'yeah.' underneath the bookmark so it's gotta have something
sorry edit one more I forgot - merlin and arthur are exes and arthur is just soooo weird and sad and repressed about it. also peer reviewed 🫶 (X) and also check out beth's merlin fanfiction recs tag if for some insane reason u want more. ok bye 🫂
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"In my case, I have a tendency to be a people pleaser and help others to the point of neglecting my own wants, needs, and boundaries"
Maybe since I'm not this way naturally, I'm exactly opposite of it, so I find this whole 'giving' thing working for me. But you're like this so I assume this might not be the way for you, Infact it might drain u even more.
I hope you reach that state of mind which you're hoping for. Also, instead of wanting to ditch the quality entirely, you could try to just control it, like divert it to some place better?
Also, i can relate w the draining part to some extent, I think😅 what I did was.. Cut off all those 'draining' friends n activities that only took from me. I must've spoke n written many huge essays/paras to help ppl (perfectly acc to their problems) n despite that, they still repeated crying over the same things so mostly I was just repeating the same stuff again n again.. Ugh.. N when I went to them for smth, since they're not like this, I obv didn't get my kind of response to stuff, which frustrated me at first, but then I learnt to control my expectations. Maybe mostly ppl just need an ear. Even i sometimes. It's ok. Anyway, now I tend to avoid such ppl who can bring this in me. Like I think abt how u be replying to all our hefty msgs! I'd never be able to do this! Seriously, claps to you! Also if your darling was my friend, I think I'd help her a lot at first w her decisions in whatever ways I could, but since I'm not attracted to her, I'd stop at one point, the moment I realise she's only gonna drain me. No offence but she does sound sorta draining from ur descriptions. Like how she's coming to u w her problems! I'm not so open so I don't understand this abt her. She reminds me of some ppl in my life who were such a headache once.
True, I don’t plan on having a bastardisation arc and stop caring about anyone else but myself. I just need to better moderate and communicate my wants/needs with other people’s.
I feel that, I find that many people want to vent their problems rather than solve them, so they want emotional reassurance and support instead of advice and harsh truths. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but I get how it can be frustrating to see people repeat the same mistakes and not really try to improve their situation, as well as draining to only serve as some’s emotional punching bag. It’s good that you know how to distance yourself when it gets too much! It sounds like you tend to be more problem-solving oriented when it comes to giving and wanting support from others. I am similar when it comes to giving (often unsolicited) advice, so I try to ask exactly what the other person wants from me: emotional support, specific advice, or just someone to listen.
I genuinely enjoy responding to asks and reading messages! Sometimes my response time gets sporadic because I have a low social battery and a hectic schedule, but I manage!
It can be a little tough with my darling mainly because it can be emotionally heavy, but I do care about her wellbeing and there are certain things she isn’t comfortable with going to anyone else to. She doesn’t want to scare off her relatively recent boyfriend with her mental health issues and already feels like a burden, so I am glad she is able to go to somebody instead of just suffering alone. I don’t help just because I love her, I just don’t want her to get hurt or die and apparently her options are limited. But we did have conversations about how it’s not sustainable for her to rely on me for that kind of thing (I am not always available!) and that there are other people she can trust.
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sorry i havent been around in a while, things have gotten crazy, im sure you get it. my first day of being a sophmore (10th grader) starts tomorrow and while im not extremely nervous it is also 11:50 at night and i have to wake up at 6:15, ignore the specific time as it is never specific, its an estimate at best.
i have this thing called band camp that has been going on for the last couple of days. basically i play my trumpet (her name is Margaret) for 4 hours in preparation for football season (im in the band, we have to play at football games) idk where you are ofc, so to clarify, this is american football. the concussion sport.
i picked up tarot reading and it's super silly, i would recommend. its funny to think that the cards are supposed to have their own personality. id say that i dont see it, but they told me to shut up once, sassy ass cards...
i havent been hurting myself as much because of how busy i am + how cold it is. a thing about me is that i cannot ever cvt when its cold. maximum discomfort. 0/10 stars. not funky fresh.
my ex and i started talking less often and im kinda glad it happened, which might be mean to say, considering were friends still, but theres so much to do, to worry about that i can barely keep up with things.
anyways, i think thats most of it. btw if you ever dont know how to respond to one of my rambles, id love it if you might just add your own story? about anything!!!! i like hearing from you!
— rin
hiya Rin :DDD I missed u!!
GL in school!! I'm gonna b a Freshman this year and I'm excited-nervous abt it... At least its gonna b the same ppl ( even though the principal warned us abt a rush of new students, but its better than going 2 a brand new school ) I gotta fix my sleep schedule so bad, I stay up till 3am and wake up at noon :'3
:0000 IM IN BAND TOO :DD I play clarinet :3 ( btw I love how u called football the "concussion sport" XDDDD )
Tarot reading sounds so cool :000 i rlly like astrology and numerology ( I'm an Aquarius :3 )
4 me it's still hot af here, even though snow melted like 3 weeks b4 summer break :> but yesterday I went 2 go walk my doggo and right as we were turning back, it started raining, and my dumbass didn't bring a jacket and I was wearing an oversized T-shirt and shorts, so I was running ( in flip-flops ) 4 ten mins in the rain tryna get back 2 my house lolol X'3
That sounded like a line from a book I read a few yrs ago XD ( but I hope ur still finding time 4 urself :) )
A few nights ago I was rlly, RLLY hyped up 4 highschool... Same school, few new kids, new teachers, maybe a new rep... Then I thought abt what my rep would b like. I mean tbh I don't mind if I'm known as a weirdo furry theatre kid, but last yr my ex-bestie spread nasty rumours bout me, manipulate me and my friend group, and overall make everyone avoid me. At least my friends knew what she's all abt and stuck w me 4 the whole yr, but like... What if the rumours spread 2 the new kids and bad stuff happen?? So then I stayed up thinking bout that and at 2am I multiswiped 10 times and I named the cvt Jeffo :3 ( I haven't cvt in weeks cuz I didn't have many Band-Aids left )
Have a good day Rin :DDD
-Muffin
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why did i think u were british this whole time. i just now noticed the romanian and i have been following u for an embarrassingly long time. omg i'm so sorry.
i was going to ask u if the UK is really this puritanical bc like. i was raised by some right-wingers who taught me that if i even danced with someone i was not married to, i would spend eternity burning in hell, and i still couldn't rlly bring myself to care abt a guy in his mid-20s making sex jokes enough to be offended abt it. but i mean u are not british so that doesn't matter now.
this also begs the question why are ppl getting moral/life advice from multimillionaires. like if lando gets a STD, he just goes and gets treatment. if an american gets a STD, they go bankrupt. u rlly have to put how promiscuous u can be in perspective of ur circumstances unless u want gangrenous genitals from chlamydia. also like if ur george russell or lance stroll or max verstappen or— and u physically harm someone, all u have to do is issue an apology. if ur quite literally a normal person, ur going to jail for that shit like u cannot behave like a multimillionaire under any circumstances unless u are also a multimillionaire bc one of three things will happen: 1) jail, 2) bankruptcy, 3) the end.
sorry for making u read my incoherent thoughts again but i know u appreciate a good landogate. i just don't really get this one. like wow local man in his twenties cracks nsfw jokes w his friends and experiences horniness. did these people never become traumatized by omegle. bc this isn't abnormal behavior for a man in his 20s spotted in the wild online. it's actually quite tame.
hi anon! so like first off ur not entirely wrong abt the british thing - i am romanian but ive been living in the uk for like 4 years now, u mightve seen a reference to that and assumed i was english. but bc ive been living there for a while i can quite confidently say that no, english people are not generally puritanical at all, much less than in america anyways. maybe theres more value put on decorum and politeness but i generally associate religiously-fuelled prudishness with american protestantism lmao. anyways
my thing is ive just come back from a vacation where i had no roaming so i genuinely have no idea whether ive missed smth major lmao. from what i could tell the thing ur talking abt is lando making dirty jokes on stream and ppl allegedly getting upset at that (??) which unless thats all been happening on twitter and i just havent seen it bc i deleted the app (god bless) (likely), the whole 'drama' seems to stem from one clickbait article by a clickbait sports news publication that seems to b based in india rather than the uk. was this abt the way landos (british) friends responded to him on stream? bc from what i could tell they were also participating in the moaning and calling themselves daddy activities. otherwise like what predominantly british public did u see upset? its quite odd as a thing to happen
not saying this isnt a pattern w lando tho - back in 2020 idk if u were around but if u were, u should rmbr how dire the situation was. basically anyone who'd make a sex joke around lando was essentially corrupting god's most darlingest little baby boy, how dare they. theres a certain amount of infantilisation around lando that thank god isnt happening as much anymore but maybe its reared its ugly head again. or, if ppl r getting mad at him for Corrupting His Audience (if theyre getting mad at all - again ive only seen ppl saying it was totally fine and funny), then this just represents his full flip into the whore part of the madonna whore dichotomy. the same reason miley cyrus twerking at the 2013 vmas wouldve been so much more scandalous than another female singer that hadnt previously had a child-friendly teen star image.
i dont rly know how to address the whole life advice paragraph - i rly dont think lando talking abt a girl character in fortnite shooting cream out of her palms or propellers or smth is exactly life advice. lando specifically has quite a complicated relationship w his position as a role model and he often worries abt the 'advice' he gives ppl - smth thats also like, true, hes a v sheltered 23 year old who lacks a lot of normal life experiences bc his professional career basically started around age 7. idrk what to say abt the whole std thing bc like not only have i not heard lando talk actual details abt his potential promiscuity beyond a couple vague jokes, but also bc ive never had to think abt going into debt over chlamydia doamne pazeste. also like idk if i push someone nothing happens but if max verstappen does it on an international broadcast he has to do community service for it so 🤷🏻♀️ u win some u lose some. not rly sure of the point u wanted to make if im totally frank lol
tldr like yeah f1 drivers r mainly irresponsible athletes in an extreme sport and u shouldnt model ur life after them. but also op ur life sounds terrifying like 'jail / bankrupcy / the end' sounds like either the way US capitalism works (big up the prison industrial complex) or oscar wilde's new years resolutions in january 1895 lmao
#wondering abt 'again'? is this a recurring visitor#if so welcome back#r u the esteban / pierre anons from a couple days ago#or are you the oscar stan anon come back from the war?? if so missed u#anon#ask#lando#(vaguely)
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i have sent anon asks usually abt bertholdt and i am far too scared to actually interact w u so instead i am going to timidly ask if i can be 🪷 anon 😭😭 and send u this bertholdt ask im abt to send right now LOL sorry 🙁😭 my adhd has taken the best of me and my brain can’t go any further than “wow opposite attract 😃” in this fic im writing abt savior goddess oc x god of destruction bertholdt where OC is a titan shifter and her titan is praised to be the saving grace of her homeland while bertholdt’s infamous CT is known as the god of destruction; they are both used as tools for the gain of power, OC being seen as a savior and bertholdts titans main purpose is to destroy - including OC’s titan homeland. back when the warriors first receive their titans, one of their first missions is to attack OC’s homeland, which puts this border between OC and RBA + Marcel but especially bertholdt since they’re the closest which is evident throughout the whole story; they are no longer comrades/best friends, they are enemies - this is the first realization OC has at just 11 years old when she witnesses bertholdt, who has fully mastered the CT at just 11 years old, blowing up her homeland; one day, she’ll go to marley and do the same, for her homeland. anyways OC is sent to paradis bc Marley doesn’t want her homeland gaining any power with her titan and like I stated before, there is a clear border between OC + RBAM, they do not talk, they do not interact with each other, they only talk when it is necessary. OC is very determined to gain liberation and embraces her role as a god. Bertholdt is very passive and meek about his role as the god of destruction. Although OC is very determined about her role as the saving grace for her homeland, OC knows she is not fit for the role, even if she is full of determination and will and comparing this to Bertholdt, who knows he is fit for the role because someone has to get blood on their hands and he would rather it be him than anybody else. So OC may have more of a spine, Bertholdt has more of an understanding of what it is to be labeled a “god”. so essentially, the relationship between OC and Bertholdt is savior and destruction, bertholdt is bound to destroy the world around him and OC is bound to save this world. Bertholdt is the forest fire and OC is the seed thst grows out of it. They are interconnected, no matter how much they’ve grown apart, one cannot exist without the other. Bertholdt will always seek to be saved and OC will always save him. anyways my question is, since I really really like the way you write, how do I write or better the connection (both romantic and non-romantic) between OC and Bert? i want it to be deep and full of meaning and angst and toxicity but everything I write is very surface level :(
IM SORRY ITS SO LONG!!! I DIDNT EXPECT IT TO BE THIS LONG!! :O
😲 First off!
Please don't be intimidated by me!!! I am but a ridiculous being who spends entirely too much time fantasizing about fiction worlds and characters ☺️ But you can totally be 🪷 nonnie!
Also, I'm so honored you'd write me like this since I feel like I so rarely post legit writing here. It means so much that you think so highly of my works!
Okay, now for my commentary, which may not be the best cause it's late but I didn't wanna wait to respond cause I might forget
I really dig this idea! I'm seeing some similarities with ideas I've had clunkin around my head about other nations outside the continent and Paradis, having been blessed with the power of titans but maintaining and utilizing them in a less power hungry way than Eldia did. And thus keeping them under wraps throughout the wars and all that-outside keeping their communities safe.
I guess to begin I want to pose a couple questions that may turn this into a way bigger fic scope than you want it to be so feel free to ignore!:
with OC being from a different homeland (so not Marley) how does she grow up and initially befriend Bertie and the crew?
In the same vein, how does Marley possess the power to send her to Paradis? Is it as an exile?
Why does OC not feel fit for her role? She seems pretty damn fit for it to me with your description of her embracing the role to gain liberation for her people /and herself from exile?
I think it may be difficult to really build a more solid, deep connection between OC and Bertie if the rift happens so early on in their lives. Perhaps, they aren't aware that Marley is planning to use the others to destroy OCs homeland? Maybe initially they broker a deal to help train OC to better wield their titan in order to be a proper protector for their homeland. In reality Marley is wanting her beneath their thumb as another power seat in their own pocket. Her bonding with Bertholdt and the others just helps solidify this piece and so they have he accompany the crew on the Paradis mission to further prove her/her homelands allegiance to the Empire of Marley?
So then they have those extra years to grow closer and such and get to an age where romantic feelings could be sparked due to puberty and such. It could be more canon divergent from there, in that they return (maybe victorious over Paradis even) and Marley decides after that successful mission, that wiping out/conquering OC's homeland will put them into an even greater seat of power among the nations?
#🪷 nonnie#answered asks#please take my ideas with a grain of salt darling#i tend to complicate things beyond compare
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First of all hi this is me Jadzio just on my reblog side account. I don't use my main here just cause I like to keep things organized (somewhat) and I don't like rb stuff a lot, so I archive stuff here or respond to plp. aaaa anyways main point
I'm glad it turned out ok and that now I know your pronouns! And I understand your perspective and it's valid as well as your feelings, on the matter tho I wish to share a but of mine I suppose.
I'm nonbinary and use they/they and I personally feel very iffy when plp call me other stuff. so whenever I write stuff like those tags, it comes mostly from my experiences and not something I feel like its like a, how would u call it, a proper manner to do, ifk if its making sense aaaa. I once, early on, didnt have my pronouns posted anywhere and a big friend of mine at the time called me a gendered pronoun. now why I'm calling it like that instead of just he/she? cause she was right, it was a pronoun of my asignet gender. so it should be fine, right? I should feel weird abt it right? how did she know, did I act like it, do I speak like it? haha ..... crisis time. of course its not as big of a deal and she did later say that she just shoot her shoot cause she didn't know. and I'm probably not the best at describing my feelings on my gender own. but I just dont wanna anyone to feel bad cause I misgendered them, when its so simple to just ask and it can be avoided.
also other stuff
well u are a lucky one to have a language with no gender, can I have some? I'm polish and this is the language we're u slap a table and go "aw yis... a man". they are inescapable and very weird cause they affect structure of words as u use them, so 90% plp dont know how they exacly work, so adding gender neutral pronouns is very hard and unintuative, to the point most polish enbys had given up on that front. me included, tho I still go by any/they (male), but most plp still give up on trying with me and I get it.
also saying pronouns out loud like that. I get it. its not usual and we are not rlly used to it, but tbh it never rlly iked me. it goes as quick as the name and we go on. but also listen, idk if plp can rlly recognize gender of cis plp (tho id still say the change of failure is like 10%). idk if its just my experience. and I'm not speaking from experience with plp who wear different gender cloths or something, no, its just weird like that and it happens a bit.
I shall keep that in my. if I ever won't be able to deal with it myself, I will make sure to send them here to be eaten alive.
so yeah tldr my pronouns are my symbol of perfection, so I won't let anyone get walken over. and I know this post is also coming from a kind place dw, just adding some of my own stuff to the mix I guess and like I said your stuff is also vaild
Ok, I feel like it would probably be nice of me to respond to this
Yes, he/him are absolutely my correct pronouns, I just don't really put that anywhere (unless I'm forced to), because I frankly don't care about which pronouns people use for me (which is why I've also picked any/all alongside the he/him in the SC, btw). I would probably correct others if they assumed I was a she/her, but I'd honestly find that more charming and funny, and not really insulting or offensive.
This is partially due to my native language not having any gendered pronouns whatsoever, but also, I feel like this recent obsession with putting pronouns everywhere is getting a tad weird (Especially when people walk up to a live stage and mention them while introducing themselves... like dude - we all know what men and women look and sound like, don't y'all think this is just a bit redundant? Feels like it'd be enough if just the they/them-s were the ones to mention it, once it would naturally come up)
Don't take this in a negative manner though, the post was real sweet, and I know this is coming from a place of kindness, which I wholeheartedly appreciate. And there's absolutely no need to edit anything - everything is perfect as it is, and seeing it all made me real happy.
Though if any of you end up accidentally misgendering someone, and that person starts a giant fuss over it - then please by all means send them to me. Or just tell them yourselves, that your pronouns are 'symbol of perfection'/'my lord and savior', and it's gonna be offensive to you if they don't use these. (Though I always wanted to pull that on a conflict seeking narcissistic jerk myself xd)
#obligatory srr for misspellings#its 11pm + on moblie#I need to go to sleep wwawwaawa#also tag me in thooseeee#if u wanna#u probably would if u wanna but like#I came here cause I was like#wait is he a journeys end enjoyer over lttm#must investigate#anyway feel free to not respond or do#I'm going to sleeeeepp
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