#anyways I'm never going to actually write him as an Admiral because it will kill me

[anundyingfidelity]

OUT OF MIND — Soldier Boy/Ben

Summary: Ben believes he's alone in the lab, that you're just a product of his imagination and insanity. Is not like that, you're more real than he ever thought.

Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x female reader.

Word count: 1.3k.

Warnings: sexual content, p in v, blowjobs, handjobs, heavy non-con (such as reader taking advantage of Ben), nudity, some angst, mentions of torture and being unconscious.

Note: *another one* this is part of @artyandink Jensen's drabble marathon (if it can't be due to the content of this is totally okay tho!) Anyway hope you like this dark piece of crap I had on my drafts because I could never write a long fanfic ever again, I'm taking so damn long to write.

☕ if you like my writing, support me with a ko-fi !

GEN MASTERLIST!

taglist is here!

The last doctor left, metal door closing behind his back, leaving you all alone with the man lying down in a too uncomfortable stretcher, hands and ankles tied.

The doctor's instructions were clear. He didn't care what you'd do to the experiment in the room. No one cared. As much as a scientist you were yourself, you stayed until late, admiring the former hero at your complete mercy, with nowhere to go or a voice to yell for help. Not that he might needed though.

The room was cold as you paced to remain by his side. His chest going up and down, eyes closed as he slept thanks to the dosis of gas you always administered before taking the tests of his blood and getting into the good part: the torture.

Tens of scientists and doctors stepped the lab to test his strength and powers, gifting him of endurance and new abilities along the way. You were one of them. And this was your price for making him indestructible instead of killing him, switching completely the main objective of the reds. You never really talked to Soldier Boy, more than just the silent moans and gasps leaving your mouth when you actually got into business. Ninety nine percent of the time he was unconscious under the effects of the gas, but he did caught you on top of him a couple of times, or just sucking him off until he was hard in your mouth. The only thing further than talking was his green eyes staring at you, just as he woke up from the slumber. But that made it a thousand times better.

With your fingertips, you traced his bare arm. The skin hot against your hand, finding the way up to his muscular chest, and then down his stomach, stopping right above his crotch. Your mind started wandering all over with the past memories of you and him inside that same lab room.

It was wrong, but you couldn't stop.

You've done this countless of times, what was with doing it again? Besides, he was a piece of shit of a man as far as you knew, using women as appliances and then tossing them like garbage once he was bored. You had to have fun too. Your hand went under his pants, softly playing with his shaft, as your free one went to brush away the mess his hair was doing on his forehead, so delicately.

His cock grew hard thanks to your touch, jerking him off smoothly. It only made you yearn for him more, the wetness between your legs increasing as you rubbed your thighs together to feel some friction that could relief you for a moment.

You pushed your skirt up and took off your panties, completely desperate to feel him inside you. But before you pulled his pants down enough to free his dick, ans you leaned down to take the tip of his cock between your lips, sucking him just right to earn a somewhat loud gasp from his throat. You took him deeper in your mouth, soaking his shaft with your saliva and stroking with your hand what couldn't fit.

Just as you tasted some pre cum, you pulled back and climbed on top of him, straddling his thighs and lining his cock with your cunt, rubbing yourself on his length. You moaned softly sinking down on him, your tight, wet walls engulfing his dick, until your ass met the hot skin of his thighs. His cock twitched inside you as you rolled your hips in slow, deep movements, that soon became desperate. Biting your lip, you unbuttoned your blouse and pushed your bra down. Quickly, you held on his chest with the palms of your hands, riding him.

Soldier Boy brows furrowed, his breathing became unsteady as much as yours. Sometimes he looked like he would wake up in any minute, but he wasn't really able to. The features on his beautiful face used to change as you had your way with him because it was natural, and you loved to be in control. The only thing you'd regret was his big hands not being put into good use because of the restraints around them. You were so close to your climax that you wished he could bury his nails on your ass and mark it red while you're bouncing on his cock. Maybe someday you'd do it the right way. But not right now. Control suited you and you liked being on top anyway, playing with your tits at your own pace as they bounced with every thrust.

His cock met the deepest parts inside your pussy and you played with your clit and your folds, reaching sweet release and coating his cock with your juices. You continued the steady rhythm of your hips, going for a second orgasm, his dick throbbing so hard you would just fuck him until he spilled inside.

You let out a raspy moan as he came, filling you up and triggering your climax again, thighs shaking. You recovered your breathe, feeling his cock softening inside your pussy. His brows went back to normal, but you felt his heart still racing. Shifting on top of his cock, you reach his bearded cheek, caressing his features.

"I wish I could see underneath all this," you mumbled. "But I'm afraid you'll wake up for real and kill me."

You smirked just a little at the thought. Probably he'd just agree to fuck you if he was awake and back to his old self again, not drugged, not put into sleep. He was the perfect toy nonetheless.

But then, his eyes fluttered open softly. He thought it was just his mind playing tricks on him, watching your face as the bright, white lights iluminated the room. Soldier Boy often believed you were a ghost from his twisted mind, that there was something inside his mind tormenting him to the point he was being used for sexual pleasure by an unknown entity. But your touch, the heat of your body, and your weight over his own told him otherwise. You were fucking real, straddling his lap, with his dick buried balls deep in your tight cunt, tits out and messy hair and lab coat. Soldier Boy groaned, hands clenching into fists.

He spent so much time, decades, inside those concrete walls that there was this primal need inside that couldn't be met. And you were there to make it true from time to time, even if he wanted it or not.

"Good morning, sunshine," you mocked when he tried to free his wrists, but was too weak to do so. "The gas effect is fading away I see."

He grunted as you pulled off from him, climbing down to fix your clothes and putting your panties back. Soldier Boy tried to scream, but his throat was sore; he had to fight the restrains on his limbs, however it was useless. He was so powerless and fragile for a moment.

"Shhh, it's okay," you whispered, putting your hand on his forearm. He looked at you with a mixture of fear and rage. "You're gonna be okay. I always take care of you," you smiled as the stretcher began to shake while he tried to set himself free. "Now don't try it, you're a good boy. Aren't you?"

Soldier Boy groaned like a scolded puppy once you combed his hair with your fingers.

"You've been here for a long time, and no one has ever taken such good care of you as I do," you said, leaning down until your lips were close enough to his ear. "So you better obey me and keep being a good bitch for me."

Once you pulled back, he got the perfect close up of your face before you turned around and left the room, the sound of your heels echoing before the metal door finally closed. In less than five minutes, the chamber was filled with novichok.

Before sleeping again, Soldier Boy knew it was real.

The woman fucking him on his dreams and living nightmares was so damn real.

Soldier Boy taglist

@delaynew

@k-slla

@thesilmarillionblog

@onlyangel-444

@mrsjenniferwinchester

@daisy-the-quake

@jackles010378

@mostlymarvelgirl

@deans-spinster-witch

@drasticemotions

@stoneyggirl2 @sapnaploves

@believeinthefireflies95

[dolche-tejada]

Round 7 : The Duality of Qin and Hades

I don't think there was any other round conclusion that left me that confused at first. I mean... why did Hades died so tragically when he was fighting for his family and to honor his dead brother's memory, motives that usually tend to be some huge green flags in those kinds of mangas ? And then I realized the answer was right there : Hades was doomed to lost like this precisely because he was fighting for the honor of his family. To understand what I mean, you had to take a look at Hades and Qin as characters

Let's begin with Hades. He is at his core a tragic figure and this well before his actual downfall. From the moment he's introduced into the plot, Hades is defined above all through one thing : Duty. He's one of the most feared and respected gods of Valhalla, someone on which everyone rely and the Ruler of Helheim.

And this is his tragedy because Hades does not assume the responsibilities and duty that come with his status, he endures them and lets them define his entire life.

His whole language is always axed about how he has to do this or how he can't lose that just because that's who he is, never because that's his own choice.

Hades has no desire to avenge Poseidon. He's emotionally exhausted (look at the bags under his eyes), he admitted not having fought for a long time and more importantly : He damn well knows that Poseidon couldn't care less about being avenged. But he has to fight anyway because it's his inherent duty as an older brother, his vow is part of who he is.

He wasn't supposed to fight in the Ragnarok and didn't even want to kill Qin against whom he hold no real grudge. Quite the opposite, he even comes to sympathize with him and admiring him. But he still chooses to fight without hesitation since it's his duty as a god and king of the Netherworld. He can't lose against a mere king of men.

And that's where Qin comes in.

His introduction actually sums him up perfectly : We see him making his own way by breaking through walls into the gods' VIP lodges instead of waiting in his room ; he ragdolled Ares who tried to force him to leave ; and when Brunhilde asks him to follow her to the entrance gate, here's his answer

This is his core character : Qin doesn't care about traditions and expectations. He doesn't follow the path that is expected of him, he traces his own road (literally and metaphorically) and makes no compromises with anyone, whether they are gods or humans.

When confronted to Chi You, a tyrannical demon god who oppresses his country and people, Qin doesn't resign himself to accept it like previous kings did, he actively fights against this status quo and forces it to bend to his notion of duty

It can be long (his fight with Chi You literally take six days), it can be painful but this is how he proceeds and that's his greatest source of pride. He's not defined by his status as king, he's the one who defines what it means to be one

This is an essential component of his backstory and Round 7 writing. When we meet Qin as a child, he's the radical opposite of the one we know : He doesn't try to impose himself as a person and rather immediately conforms to the expectations of those around him.

Chun Yan scolds him for not acting like a child should ? He forces himself to act as such to satisfy her. His guards and the locals of Zhao use him as a scapegoat for the people they've lost ? He apologizes and endures hatred and excruciating pain because that's what is expected from him. That he passively endures

You know where I'm going with this : Little Qin is basically Hades' foil. Both represses their feelings to conform themselves to duty and exterior expectations, which make them utterly miserable (which isn't that apparent for Hades yet but I'm coming to this).

However, Qin grew up from this through his meeting with Chun Yan, which made him realize something that will forge him into a king

A lesson Alvitr will also remind him at the end of his fight by asking him to say clearly what he wants when he started to doubt of himself. Something to which Qin just answered : "I want to win... No matter what !"

One wants to win because he has made a promise from his own will, the other has to win since his vow define him.

Because Hades never learnt that lesson and always suffered from it. I've seen a lot of people praising him for how cool and badass of a big brother he is in his backstory, for wiping out a whole army of titans to protect his siblings but imo this is just sad. Instead of talking to his family about this threat and trying to find a solution together, he immediately assumes that he has to deal with them alone, even tho he knows that they are too much and he might actually die.

And when Poseidon asks him if everything's okay, he isn't even able to ask for help or just look at his brother when he's lying to him

But miraculously this time he managed to win this battle, thanks to his trump card : Ichor Eos. An ability that highlights how self-destructive Hades is when it comes to protect his duty and family. To activate this trump card, he has to hurt himself and bleed. Fulfilling his duty literally requires from him to sacrifice himself.

And despite this, Hades still insists that everything is fine afterwards. No matter how heavy his burden is, he will never be defeated because that's what the world expects from him

Except he did. Sadly this time, his burden was too heavy and he got destroyed in the process. Hades died and not even in a satisfying way. Just compare with the others fighters' death :

Lu Bu died feeling joy for the first time in his life, happy to finally fighting an equal

Adam lost with a peaceful smile on his face, knowing that he did his best to protect his children

Poseidon was bitter in his last moments but held on to his pride until the end

Heracles remained faithful to what he is and inspired Jack to become a better person

Raiden had the best sumo fight of his life and vanished with the woman he loved

Zerofuku finally got to be happy too

Nikola gave the most wholesome speech ever known to Mankind after making science evolved once again

And Leonidas was proud, having proven that Sparta will always be the strongest

But Hades ? Nothing of that

In his last moments, he was convinced of having let his family down and being a failure as a result, apologizing to them for this just before disappearing forever under their eyes.

And the most painful part of this is that Hades was the only one to see himself as such. The members of his family may have admired him for his strength and his willingness to make any sacrifice for the honor of gods but they still loved him first and foremost as a person. Adamas was ready to throw away his own pride as a god (the thing Hades literally died for) by killing a crippled half-dead Qin for winning in a fair fight. Hermes composed a requiem in his memory and Zeus was both heartbroken and sorry to hear his last words. He knew his brother had nothing to apologize for but realized that the latter didn't.

At the end of the day, Hades didn't lost this battle of kings just because Qin was stronger. He lost because Qin was the better king and learn to find worth in himself rather than in what people expected from him, while Hades let his responsibilities consume him throughout his whole life.

[the-modern-typewriter]

Okay so I recently went through a break-up so I'm a thirsty gay guy looking for some content and you're my absolute fav on this app :) Could you (if you wouldn't mind of course) write about a hero who has fallen over heals for a villian with low self-esteem who doesn't realise he isn't all that bad and was forced into this life? Maybe with some cuffs just for the spice😅 Preferably mlm but I'm a sucka for the person who won't stop flustering their crush by over complimenting them😭

"Well," the hero said. "Here we are again."

The villain looked up at the hero, standing over them. His hands were already cuffed behind his back, and, honestly, he was feeling thoroughly dishevelled. It had all happened so fast. He'd lost so fast.

The hero barely had a perfect hair out of place. He hadn't even broken a sweat! It seemed very unfair.

The villain half expected to already hear police sirens in the distance.

"You know," the hero said, hands on his hips. "I'm starting to think your heart isn't in this scary criminal thing."

"What, because I'm crap at it?" The villain wanted to sink into the floor.

"Mm, no. You're very good at it, actually. I think you just don't want to hurt me." The hero flashed them a smile. "Thank you for that, by the way."

The villain looked down at his knees and away from that smile, from his failure. He tugged at the cuffs.

His powers, such as they were, were the explosive kind. He could detonate buildings and the ground where the hero stood with a flick of his hand, obliterating the large majority of his opponents immediately...providing he didn't actually mind obliterating them. Killing them.

He was supposed to be fine with that. Didn't he used to be fine with that? The villain's jaw clenched.

"It's not an insult," the hero said, a little softer. "I don't mean it as an insult. Compassion - kindness - is an admirable quality. You know that, right?"

"Are you taking me in or not?"

"No."

The villain's gaze snapped up, wide-eyed.

The hero crouched down in front of him, putting their faces level.

The villain swallowed. "No?"

"No," the hero said, oh so casual. "Don't think that would do you any good."

"Lunatic asylum, then?"

The hero smiled, faint and crooked and something unreadable. "No."

The villain's brow furrowed. Surely that didn't mean...the hero had never seemed the type to kill. The villain tensed.

"You're remarkable," the hero said. "Smart. Powerful." The small smile grew a fraction. "Gorgeous."

The villain hated the immediate and unstoppable blush that burned their cheeks at that; like each kind word, each terribly sincere piece of flattery was its own bomb going off somewhere in the villain's body. "So you're...keeping me locked in your basement?"

The hero laughed. He sobered a little at the villain's expression.

"No," the hero said. "God, no. I meant -" The hero bit his lip, and the villain's treacherous gaze followed the movement. The hero's eyes brightened. "No," the hero said. He placed a hand over the rabbit-thump of the villain's chest. "I mean that you have a kinder heart than you give yourself credit for. If you'd like to do something else with your life than - this - I would help you. In anyway that I could. I'd like to."

The villain stared at him.

"You're asking me to join you?"

"No," the hero huffed. There was something warm, fond, to his tone. "I mean, you can if you like, you'd be very welcome. But to do something else. Whatever you want."

The villain's head spun. "You don't think I want to do this? I've - do you - you do know who I am?!"

"I know your history, yeah."

"Then you'll know - you'll know that I can't just up and do something else!"

"Why not? You're certainly talented enough to try your hand at reinvention."

"I'm a killer. I am literally made for killing and burning and destroying things!"

"You didn't kill or destroy me."

"And I lost in all of three seconds for the weakness."

The hero considered him at that; his panting, fevered, broken defence.

The villain yanked at the cuffs, desperate to run, to get away from the look on the hero's face. From all of the hero's shining expectations.

"If that was it, you can uncuff me now." It sounded a little too much like please, please, please.

The hero settled back on his haunches, warm hand falling from the villain's chest. "What do you like about your current profession?"

"Are you serious right now?" Absurdly, suddenly, the villain could feel tears pricking his eyes. Frustrated things.

"Perfectly."

"It pays well."

"And that's what matters to you?"

"You've seen me, right?" By all accounts, the villain liked the finer things in life. A nice bespoke suit felt like some small compensation for everything ugly about the rest of them.

"Oh, yes," the hero said. His gaze roamed over the villain again. "Handsome, but not very happy, I don't think."

The villain's face burned all over again. "Stop it."

"Hm?"

"Stop - complimenting me. You're trying to distract me!"

"I can't just be complimenting you?"

"No!"

The loudness of it felt like a confession, and the villain squirmed. He yanked at the cuffs again, hard enough to hurt.

"Easy," the hero said, quieter.

"If you're not going to turn me in, let me go!"

"You really hate me complimenting you that much?"

The villain glared at him, the effect largely no doubt ruined by the distress coming off in waves.

"Huh," the hero said. "Because it's me or-?"

The villain yanked at the cuffs again, even harder. Blood welled up on his wrists. He could feel his breath quickening. He could -

The hero leaned in, and the lock clicked. The cuffs sprang open.

The villain was on his feet in an instant, several large steps between them, poised to bolt completely.

The hero stayed crouched, practically on his knees, hands raised in placating surrender in the air.

The villain gawped.

"Easy," the hero said again. "I'm really not trying to upset you. I didn't mean - I didn't expect that reaction. Are you okay?"

And the villain believed him, which was far worse, because what was he supposed to do with that? What the hell was he supposed to do with the hero's compassion? His smiles, and his compliments as if the villain was in anyway worthy of any of it.

"If you're embarrassed about being flustered," the hero said, "you don't have to be. You look lovely flustered. It's really endearing. I'm not-"

The villain covered his blushing face with his hands. He wanted to claw out of his flustered skin; find some control again, find a way to make the terrifying leaps of his heart settle. To stop hoping. To stop aching for - more.

"Shut up," he hissed.

The hero shut up.

The villain didn't get to have more. Not after everything. He certainly didn't get to have someone like him.

He raised his hands from his face, and waited for the hero to flinch at the threat of it, to betray the underlying horror of what the villain was, to brace himself for death.

The hero did none of those things. He simply continued to track the villain's movements - knowing who he was dealing with, but not afraid. Never afraid.

The villain's hands faltered again.

The world did not erupt in smoke and madness.

"Easy," the hero murmured, a third time. "Can you - can you explain to me why you're upset? So maybe I can help?"

The villain gave an agonised little scoff, and fled.

[daisy-mooon]

carol/yon-rogg… thoughts? (i’m so sorry in advance)

The way I was literally just vagueposting about them on Discord 😭 the TIMING

I've read nearly every Captain Marvel fic on Ao3, Yonvers included, and I have a lot of thoughts

Gonna start this out by saying I hope this ship never becomes canon endgame

Complicated exes

Carol would not go back to him.

She would definitely have regrets and grief, but she would not go back to him. It would he impossible for her to feel safe around him.

She could maybe be a coworker or ally if she's feeling exceptionally generous and the universe would collapse otherwise, but a proper relationship is out of the window.

Yon-Rogg projected onto her a lot. She was an amnesiac clean slate. In the deleted scene, the person he most admired was himself - what if he started admiring himself after he rescued Carol? Viewing himself as a saviour too her?

Yon-Rogg would never see the Supreme Intelligence as Carol. He's a Kree supremacist, and he knows that Carol is human. He can't ever treat her as a full equal.

The Supreme Intelligence would demote him, but I doubt it would give Yon-Rogg any consequences that actually measured up too his actions.

They definitely hate each other after.

They would both beat the shit out of each other if given the chance.

They've definitely been in a relationship and they've definitely slept together.

Carol wouldn't tell Maria everything about Yon-Rogg at first because of the guilt of having a relationship but eventually would spill the beans during the blip. It would be very hard for her to do.

Yon-Rogg would 100% be jealous over Prince Yan. Meanwhile Prince Yan would obviously care, but he'd he incredibly cold and dismissive towards him. He knows him only as the guy that destroyed Carol's life. He's not deserving of his time.

Valkyrie definitely knows about him. Again, like Yan, she doesn't think he's deserving of her time. But she wouldn't hesitate at stabbing him if he came to it.

The Kree have a kinda poly culture so what I'm saying is that Carol was sleeping with Yon-Rogg and Dar-Benn at the same time and they hated each other a lot

Carol's relationship with Dar-Benn is awful but a lot healthier in the sense that Dar-Benn had zero idea about Carol's origins.

I can definitely see Dar-Benn learning about Carol's origins after she becomes Supremor and being shocked, but deciding not to do anything to punish Yon-Rogg. Again, Kree supremacy. Any good will she has for Carol goes out the window the moment she realises she's human.

The shared blood thing... poor Carol.

I NEED people to talk about the fact that Carol literally DIED and Yon-Rogg resurrected her like??? This is how you know the MCU has gone to shit because any good writer would milk the fuck outta this

Carol's fine with blood UNTIL it is blue. Blue blood makes her incredibly squeamish.

She has a Thing against blood needles and transfusions that she refuses to explain.

Yon-Rogg would never call her Carol. Mostly Vers, maybe Captain or Danvers, but never Carol. It would mean that he accepts her as a separate person.

Very bitter over her leaving - "why isn't she grateful for all I did for her?"

Yeah the Supreme Intelligence treated him wrong... but that does not mean Carol should forgive him in anyway

I know some Yonvers fans will kill me but it's an emotionally/psychologically abusive relationship.

She literally does not have access too basic medical information about her species???

Are we gonna talk about the fact that all of this time hes wittering about fair fights Carol physically can't beat him in a fair fight because Kree are stronger than humans? And that she isn't allowed to know that she's human? So she's being gaslit into thinking her failures are her fault when they're not?

I honestly also think its important that not everything should be romantic. They aren't romantic in canon and he still abused her. It's not always a partner or family member that can abuse you - it can be anyone.

I would write more but it's 1am so im wrapping it up. Anyways, final thoughts: a very interesting and deeply unhealthy dynamic that adds a lot to Carol's character but as an endgame ship would detract from her character arc. Anyways im tired af gn squad

[silusvesuius]

I’d read a whole ass book about you talking about Ulfric in both your canon and fanon version. He had a lot of potential as a character in the game but the end result felt like the writers put two hours of thoughts into his character but it was 90% plot related and everything related to his personality was squeezed into the rest of the 10%. I could literally live in his walls while playing and I still don’t get a good enough look into his mind. I had to feed off crumbs given to me through the civil war questline and his conversations with Galmar (also for some reason I was able to sleep in his bed after I was done with that questline which was odd but oh well) you can barely have a conversation with him about HIM. And one could go through a play through and completely miss a lot of details about his life with no problem at all. Like come on he could’ve at least had a journal in his bed table or something, how come a random fucking miner deep within an old cave gets one and he doesn’t. I coped with how “put together” he seems from the outside with assuming that he’s the type to bottle it all up and only allows that side of him to show when he’s alone with Galmar (again we could’ve had more dialogue with just the two of them) with him turning into a completely different man behind closed doors and resembling nothing to the cold hardy leader he appears to be sitting in his throne. But even with all of that we still got way too little content of him considered what we’re told he’s gone through.

But yeah anyways, I enjoy it every time you talk about your interpretation of him, I could spend hours just reading about it I ain’t even exaggerating *autism*. And I’d love to also hear more about your fanon depiction of him. These two versions might seem separate yet they feel so intertwined as if one is in a higher spiritual level. I dunno which one’s which.

So yeah keep being the amazing artist that you are.

THANK YOU LOOOL 💗 Yes literally my princess is so isolated in his own mind that he doesn't even write his thoughts down everywhere (he's afraid the th*lmor agents that are hiding in his closet will read his diary and relay everything to el*nwen) he has no good coping mechanisms. we will never know how he's feeling because the only times he talks about it is when he's bathing with galmar or something (it's too ecchi we can't be seeing or hearing none of that) or when he's really exhausted after an insanely long day, collapsing into his arms and starting to cry saying he's s//icidal, and before galmar can even say anything ulfric is like (Slicks hair back again and rubs off the snot and tears) "actually nvm i'm good"

they gave us the two crumbs of him seeming a bit like a paranoiac in 2 lines and then that one fruity af conversation between him and galmar and thought it's enough to keep us fed. and it is. And it is. (my bones sticking out) i will flip them turn them and make a pancake

if i was president ulfric would be would always be looking @ U sideways && like he's about to deck you in the mouth; unlikable, unapproachable, nasty, horrid, paranoid;... the list goes on

+ i love the tidbit of t*rygg actually admiring ulfric it's so funny to me. Don't try to befriend a traumatized war veteran guys now t*rygg is up there singing in talos' choir. he killed him for all of the reasons listed in canon but also because he hates seeing people be happy especially elves (el*sif). Shut up brainless, th*lmor-tainted... woman, DISHWASHER, get ready to be triggered by loud sounds for the rest of your life like me when i hear the clacking of heels

[eaymtb]

To extend a metaphor: Writing for me is going on a road trip. The Plot/Plan/Research part of my brain is in the passenger seat with a stack of pamphlets and an itinerary of major tourist destinations we Definitely Have To See along with a secondary list of sight seeing stops along the way. Write, meanwhile, is in the driver's seat and is navigating purely based on the vibes. Oh, Plot can point Write in a direction, that's easy enough, but Write is figuring out how we get there as they go, taking detours and back roads to admire the scenery. And they actually work pretty well together. Write creates problems sometimes, getting a bit lost maybe or going out of the way to explore something interesting, but Plot really enjoys solving problems anyway, so even when Write takes the story somewhere unexpected, Plot can work with it and still keep us headed in the general direction of the next major destination.

Right up until these last two chapters. I'm not mad about it. Okay, I was for a hot second when I realized what I'd done and then realized that the next major destination isn't plausible anymore. I spent a week seriously considering re-writing one or both chapters and ultimately decided not to. And then I had to spend a bit of time being sad about not getting to go to this next destination. And then I decided it, fuck it, I'm going to figure out how to make it work anyway, and then I had to come to terms with realizing that, no, actually, I can't. Not and still write a good story that makes sense.

Which, that's the thing. Write knows what it's doing, more or less. It's heavily intuitive and I can't articulate the process for shit, but relying on it always takes me somewhere good, even if it's not where I thought I wanted to be. Where am I now is where I think I need to be for the characters and therefore the story and that's one of my key rules: The characters dictate the plot, never the other way around. And if that means killing this one particular darling plot destination that I've been hoarding since almost the beginning, then, well. It's going to have to die.

I sort of have EaYMtB arranged into loose arcs in my mind. The first arc had two major destinations. One was to confront Genesis with a Consequence that would thoroughly shake him out of his self-righteous self-pity. I had the events of chapter 10 in mind from the very beginning. The other was getting Cloud and the kids to Wutai. That goal, on the other hand, I didn't initially have any clue how I was going to accomplish, never mind what the destination was going to look like when I got there. It required some very intense days spent with maps, measuring tape, calculators and just so much research on various vehicles speeds while I figured out a route, but what that route ended up looking like in prose comes entirely down to Write figuring it out on the fly. 'They take a charter boat from Mideel to the Gongaga coast' became Smilin' Joe as I was writing Chapter 4. I had a day of pure panic towards the end of that arc when I thought for a minute that I'd written myself into a position where Cloud and the kids couldn't actually plausibly escape the Turks. Plot solved that dilemma by deciding 'Cloud has a PTSD trigger' and Write successfully took that and ran with it because not only did it solve the immediate dilemma I was having (that Cloud didn't know they were being hunted and would therefore have no reason not to stick with the original plan of sleep until morning and then bribe or threaten a fisherman into taking them across to Wutai, at which point all the Turks would have descended on the coast) it also added to the idea I wanted to build that Cloud's mental health maybe wasn't as stable as everyone would like to think.

The second arc had one primary goal and one secondary goal. The secondary was to get Genesis and Sephiroth together romantically in some clearly stated way. I had no idea how I was going to accomplish that either, to begin with, and figured it all out on the fly, too. The only part of that development which I knew I wanted to incorporate from early on was the conversation about Loveless and how winning the love of a goddess is easier than the love of a parent. Not a major plot goal, but an important character note I wanted to make sure I struck. The primary goal, however, was the confrontation at Fort Tamblin and I had been sitting on that one line, 'The only thing heroes do is die.', since the beginning, as well as the aftermath of that being the very first time Zack gets a POV. Getting there though, that was all in Write's hands once again. Plot had some notes: develop Cloud's relationship with the kids, continue developing the kids as independent individuals distinct from Sephiroth, etc. 'I want Cloud to encounter a language barrier' became Izayoi literally as I was writing that paragraph in the town square. I went back and did some research in order to name her after she mimed giving birth to Sasame. (Write gave me an amazing character with a small problem: what's her name. And plot figured that out in a way that ties them into some of FF7's development lore).

So I'm in arc three now, of what should be (might still be?) five plus an epilogue. Except, obviously, I've blown up the destination plot goal of this arc. Gone. Doesn't work. This darling is dead. And I've accepted that, it's fine. The problem I now have is that this arc destination was going to be the culmination of several things, not least of which was setting Lazard and Veld up for their roles in act four. Okay, maybe I'm not as good with this as I want to be just yet. It's, just, it was so much. I've been building up to this the entire time and now... Now what I have is a bunch of plot stuff that I know how works in theory. I have the lore developed behind it. I know exactly what's going on with Angeal's sword, for example, down to the why and how, which is also the safest example I can give because everyone knows there's something weird going on with it. But also the call to reunion is obviously going to be A Thing. And Hojo is up to some shenanigans, that's hardly a secret. But the itinerary is now in tatters, I've gone off road, the compass has broken, et cetera, et cetera. Just to really drag the metaphor out on it's last legs. (It can die out here in the desert with me).

Okay, I'm done with the dramatics. I'm not a huge fan of continuing without a solid itinerary of plot destinations. It's kind of scary! I don't know any more how I'm going to tie everything together. But it's also maybe a little exhilarating. I spent yesterday working out the immediate problem of What Happens Next. And I have the bare bones of the next handful of chapters. I'm also thinking that, maybe, I get to expand outwards again. Everything recently has narrowed down to Wutai, to Cloud and the kids and the Firsts. The confrontation and it's immediate aftermath. But maybe now I have a good reason to expand back outwards. To reintroduce the Turks in a more active way again. Maybe find a way to integrate some of the other characters like young Cloud, who wasn't supposed to be a thing until halfway through arc four, but now. Now I might have an even better way of introducing him. A way that I'm kind of excited about. Does it screw up some things I thought I was going to do? Abso-fucking-lutely it does. But maybe this is good, maybe this is better.

And, oh, oh fuck, I just had an idea that literally had me run from one end of the house to the other making squawking noises. HA. Okay, well, mission accomplished with this post. I was trying to get to a point of hyping myself up for the possibility of actually pantsing this for the time being. Seeing what happens a handful of chapters at a time. Reframing the plot stuff I have from 'I'm about to resolve some of this' to 'I have these in my back pocket, now let's see how I can use them.' (Terrifying. Terrifying. But exhilarating.)

[what-if-i-just-did]

Guilt & Revenge: Sunburn

Whumptober, Day 5: Sunburn

Guilt & Revenge Masterlist

I JUST finished writing this... I'm gonna try to write some other stuff so I can build up a buffer again. I really hope ya'll r enjoying this series too so far. I think some things still feel vague vague without the context? So I might add some meta over the next few days. I promise everything makes sense once it's all published and in order, it's just confusing now. Anyways, lmk if you wanna be added to the taglist!

TWs: off-screen torture, shame/guilt over being complicit in torture, captivity, implied previous underage whump, mentions of bullying, crying, and possible suicidality

Paul hadn’t wanted to make the forty minute drive to Buffalo this week, since it had been really busy at work this week, but when Mercedes said she’d go over to Dom’s in an hour… he decided work could wait. 

He’d gotten sunburnt yesterday, because he’d gotten invested in the book he was reading outside and lost track of time. It was only the second time in his entire life that he’d gotten sunburnt, but it was a heatwave afterall. He felt kind of stupid, in retrospect.

Looking at Dom now, he felt a wave of shame wash over him. There he was, worrying about things like sunburns and books when they were literally keeping a person captive and torturing him. It had been.. almost two years since they all found each other. He never meant to start any of this. By the time he realized they were serious, it was too late to back out. They kind of scared him. And.. deep down, he wanted to see Dom suffer. Just to see how it felt.

It felt fucking awful. He felt guilty. The tiny glimmer in him that felt justified, satisfied by the retribution, was far outweighed by the part in him that was hyper aware of what they, what HE, was putting another person through. How horrible it was. 

He couldn’t help but stare at Dom’s skin, ignoring the red running over it. Dom was almost translucent. He wasn’t particularly dark before, at all, but… over a year without sun. Dom would never have a sunburn again. He’d never feel sunshine again, never see the sun or the sky or clouds… never smell freshly cut grass or the ground after rain. Never set foot on dry land again.

Slowly, a realization punched it’s way into Paul’s chest, and guilt pierced his heart. They had taken this man’s life. They might not have killed him, although Paul was sure that was where this would eventually head. But they had stolen his life. Taken away everything he had, until he might as well be dead. God knew that if it had been Paul in that situation, he’d rather be dead than what Dom was currently experiencing.

It had been months since Dom tried to mouth off at them or struggle. Suddenly, with a shock, Paul wondered if Dom had reached the same conclusion. That he’d rather be dead.

Paul blinked a few times, trying to shake the thoughts. Guilt would help no one. What was done, was done. He watched Mercedes as she was busy with Dom, admiring how gentle she was, even as she was doing… horrible things. He didn’t understand how she could believe this was justified, but even with that belief, she showed compassion. 

Not for the first time, Paul wondered if Dom had already mellowed out by the time he bullied him. If he’d been worse with the others, done something that actually warranted this. The realization of Dom’s suffering gave him deja vu to the last time he’d felt the exact same. The first and only time he’d seen Dom cry.

Well, no longer the only. Dom had done a lot of crying the past year and a half. More like, 

the only time when they had been kids. That was a better phrasing.

Was it? Weren’t they still kids? They were still teenagers. Legally adults, now, but…

They hadn’t been when it started. Only Mercedes had been. But aside from legality, they weren’t really adults. Were they? Paul certainly didn’t feel like it. Maybe Hugo and Eileen and Mercedes did. Maybe they felt like adults, and that’s why they didn’t feel bad for what they were doing to Dom. Did they view him as an adult, too?

He scratched at his skin. He’d forgotten how annoying sunburns were. Dom would never have to deal with it again, or with so many other troubles of the outside world.

No, his trouble was far worse now. Paul’d bet that Dom wished he could deal with little issues like sunburns and books right now. And not… this.

Paul swallowed. He just felt like a little kid, in over his head.

[generallemarc]

Fuck you Disney. You win.

There's something that's very core to me when it comes to properties I like: I am a sucker. I will see something that's not good, acknowledge that it's not good, and then proceed to fall for it anyway. I not only enjoyed Resurrection F, I re-watched it. That's the level we're dealing with here. So when I see the cringiest-ass thing imaginable for the introduction of something I never thought I'd see in a million years, the entrance of Grand Admiral Thrawn into the world of live-action, I was determined not to let it suck me in.

And then he spoke. And I remembered from the single episode of Sherlock I'd watched all the way through that Lars Mikkelsen is also a regular actor, and thus had been able to come back to the new medium like he'd been there all along. I loved Rebels, and 70% of that was because of Thrawn, because this was the Thrawn I'd grown up with with a voice that matched him perfectly. I'm not going to watch all of Ahsoka. I'm not going to bother following the wider narrative, and I'm certainly not going to give a damn about any of the new Strong Empowered Women they'll be sure to shill me as they kill off or backgroundize all the characters we actually give a damn about. But I will see every last second of Thrawn's screentime. Because Mikkelsen's performance, even against the worst writing and decisions Disney can come up with, is guaranteed to be superbly artistically done.

[stellamancer]

OOO I wanna play for the fandom ask game!!

N, I, K, U ☺️🥰💕💌

LMAOOO ERIKA....

N - Name 3 things you wish you saw more of in your main fandom or fandom of choice.

Slow burn long fic. And when I say long fic i mean more than 50k. I kind of feel like I might have to be the change I want to see in the world but man... People who write long fic like really long fic are truly admirable. I mean, if I scour ao3 I think I'll probably find some... that also requires scouring ao3.

I'm actually not sure what else? I think I'm pretty satisfied otherwise LMAO. Fanmerch maybe... But then again, maybe that's a good thing for my wallet. I buy a lot of official merch anyway.

I - Has tumblr caused you to stop liking any fandoms, if so which and why?

Lin asked me the other day when I mentioned it, but in a sense I kind of got away from Mystic Messenger in part thanks to tumblr. To repeat my previous answer then, I felt pretty discouraged when I got rejected from zines and I thought I was at least a fairly decent writer. I didn't say it then, but in some ways I kind of felt like an outsider? Truthfully, at the time I mostly wrote and never really read and I think my hermit status then contributed to that.

I also don't like Stranger Things and have it filtered. After seeing 5000 of the same gif of that one guy's face. I'd had enough LMAO. I recently filtered something else but I shan't say. >_>;

K - What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?

Katsuki Bakugou. I was distraught when it seemed like Hori was gonna kill him off because like... To bring that character so far just to kill him? Terrible absolutely terrible. (On the other side of that to also basically immediately resuscitate him? What was the point of killing him right there in the first place?) There have been recent manga developments that have caused me to feel the same way so I haven't actually read the manga since then OOPS.

U - Three favorite characters from three favorite fandoms and why.

I'm assuming this means one each, right?

Drakenier series - YorHa No. 9 Type S (9S)

Nines is really precious. Really sweet. How energetic he is! Enthusiastic he is! He's a good foil to 2B who is so stoic. I can't talk about him too much without getting into spoiler territory and someone who follows me is playing so I don't want to do that, but what I will say is 9S is a little unwell and I like that.

IDOLiSH7 - Nikaido Yamato

It's his glasses. I like a man in glasses okay!! Okay, so like Yamato is the type who would tease me and I'm a freak because I'm into that!! It's so funny because I'm a Yamato oshi, but like I think that objectively Mitsuki and Gaku and Ryuu are better men LMAO. More worthy of fawning over, but I still like Yamato because of that mean streak. Okay, next.

Jujutsu Kaisen - Satoru Gojo

There has never been a character that I've known was going to fuck me over the way I knew Gojo was going to get me. I've said this before, but it was a very conscious choice to not get into JJK for as long as I did because I knew. And even if he was the worst character ever I'd find some reason to like him. Actually you know what? Why is he even on this list? I hate him. He's so hard to write because it feels like there's too many things going on in his head and it's all layered and it feels like he's the master of being two things at the same goddamn time. Concerned but amused? Cool but a pathetic loser? I hate him so goddamn much.

[voyageofthenautilus]

Mod Blue's Thoughts

Finally able to write up my thoughts on the last few chapters of 20k Leagues. Both myself and Mod Pluto have been very busy with other things, so we may not getting around to reading/reblogging everyone's posts in a timely manner, but I personally have been enjoying following along with what everyone has to say!

The Red Sea

-I like Aronnax's knowing, "hint-hint" comment to Nemo at the end of this chapter: " It would be most unfortunate if such a secret were to die with its inventor!” And how Nemo just changes the subject immediately. Come to think of it, I love the way the dialogue in this story is structured. Lots of back and forth without too many descriptions of the way it's being spoken, or what the characters are doing/how they look when they say it, and yet the dialogue itself completely gets across the way they're saying it and how they look. Reminds me of a script, almost.

-I wonder if Nemo praising the French explorers (de Lesseps is not the first one he praised in the story) is Verne's attempt at misdirecting the readers into believing that he's a Frenchman. (That, and the scene where [SPOILERS].) That would be very ironic if he were, and Aronnax didn't recognize a fellow countryman... but we all know he isn't (and I believe that can be inferred even without reading The Mysterious Island). Funny, then, that Nemo should have so much respect for the French, and now here's a Frenchman who showed up on the Nautilus- maybe that's one reason why he's attracted to him, because he admires his country.

-"There can be no secrets between men who will never leave each other." DAMN.

Arabian Tunnel

-Ned's skepticism about the tunnel at the beginning of the chapter is so amusing to me. "Who ever heard of such malarkey?" LOL. And of course, he's proven wrong.

-Actually, Ned is amusing throughout this whole chapter. "We're old chums, whales and I, and I couldn't mistake their little ways." LOL again. And "I've never killed anything like that!" (I'm honestly starting to wonder why Ned was made Canadian and not American, as some of his traits seem very stereotypically American- but I also enjoy that he COMPLETELY subverts the "nice Canadian" stereotype! (which of course is probably a more modern thing...))

-It's adorable how Conseil genuinely believed the dugong was a mermaid for like, half a second. That, and the comment about a second Nautilus. Does nothing faze this man?

-...Something tells me that dugongs don't work the way Jules Verne thinks they work.

The Greek Islands

-So yeah, the "neutral like Switzerland" quote was an invocation of Twilight, and I am so pleased to know there are people out there for whom this phrase was NOT ruined (because they never read the books/saw the movies), because my brain is unable to divorce this phrase from Kristen Stewart's delivery of it in the movie Eclipse. Anyway: things are starting to come to a head here, and it's about time. Aronnax has been thoroughly dazzled and absorbed by the Nautilus, and Ned is not having it at all. He has a life that he wants to get back to. No amount of scientific research and wonders can obscure the fact that he's a prisoner. And he's not going to accept any vague "surely this voyage will end!" comments from Aronnax, because deep down (or not so deep down), Aronnax doesn't want to leave, and Ned knows that if one person stays, everyone else will stay. So he's ready to make a decision, which Aronnax is not ready to do in the least. Acckkk, this conflict gets so much harder to read as the story goes along...

-Also, poor Conseil really needs to stop living and dying by Aronnax's decisions, as I said at the beginning of the book. But I feel like he might choose to stay as well, which complicates things for Ned even further.

-Originally I had the Feb. 14 and 15 emails scheduled as one big entry, before I realized that the 15th can be sent as its own email, so the heading we got for Feb. 14 is more appropriate for Feb. 15... but Valentine's Day or not, I fully believe that infodumping to Aronnax IS Nemo's love language.

-Y'all are so much smarter than me. Even having read this book a few times, I was just as much in the dark as Aronnax was about what Nemo was up to with the gold ingots.

-Speaking of which... the scene with Nemo doing all of this in full view of Aronnax and then immediately brushing it off, BWAHAHAHAHA.

The Mediterranean In Forty-Eight Hours

-"It was obvious to me that this Mediterranean, pinned in the middle of those shores he wanted to avoid, gave Captain Nemo no pleasure. Its waves and breezes brought back too many memories, if not too many regrets. " Kind of an oddly specific assumption to make, there...

-Interesting to read the bit about how the Earth will die from losing its heat. If anything, it's seemed to me in modern times that the Earth will die from becoming TOO hot. And funny comment about the Moon, too- now that the theory that the Moon was once a chunk of Earth that broke off in some sort of collision and fell into the planet's orbit has become the most commonly accepted one when it comes to how the Moon was formed, I'm very amused by the thought of people thinking in Verne's time that it had simply "lost its vital heat" like they predicted the Earth would eventually. (If I'm wrong about anything I've said here, please correct me!)

-“Then we have ample time to finish our voyage,” Conseil replied, “if Ned Land doesn’t mess things up!” Lmao, burn. Someone's feeling a little testy when it comes to Mr. Land? (I feel like this definitely shows that Conseil would prefer to stay on board, regardless of his "master.")

-"...although his catalog is a little dry..." Speak for yourself, Aronnax!

The Bay of Vigo

-Wow, Aronnax has got it BAD for Nemo, secretly hoping that Ned's plan will fail and worrying about causing him distress by leaving. Oh, Aronnax.

-"Never was hospitality more wholehearted than his." You say about the dude who drugged you and locked you in your room to keep you from spying on him?

-There's the portraits of freedom fighters! Yes!! Nemo definitely places himself among them, as we are going to see later in the chapter.

-I said it already, but that one part in this chapter where Nemo bursts in and completely derails Aronnax's train of thought never fails to amuse me, and is one of my favorite Nemo moments in the whole book.

-I'm half-convinced that Nemo knew they were planning to escape that night (although how would he know that?), because it seems VERY convenient that he'd show Aronnax the treasure of the Bay of Vigo right when Aronnax was planning to leave, thus ensnaring him further. (That, and the physical impossibility of getting to the surface in time...)

-FUCK YEAH the ending of this chapter! Nemo is 100% right in this regard (in my opinion anyway). When Aronnax was talking about the company assigned to recover the lost treasure, I was thinking... "there's no way he seriously believes the wealth would ever be distributed to those who need it?" But then again, Aronnax has proven himself to be surprisingly naïve and idealistic when it comes to the government and corporations (and tbh, naïve when it comes to individuals as well, seeing how deeply he trusts in Nemo). If only his love for Nemo would radicalize him... but his privilege may stand in the way of that.

A Lost Continent

-Major eye-roll at Aronnax trying to convince Ned that Nemo's not all that bad, really. Ned is already 100% set in his opinion that they need to get the hell off this ship and nothing Aronnax can say will change that. In fact, Ned probably just hears (what sounds to him like) demented ravings when Aronnax is talking about Nemo and what he witnessed.

-As for the rest of the chapter: GORGEOUS. And what a romantic notion in general, of Atlantis being discovered and explored under the sea.

[prosperdemeter2]

Just love all the emotional growth and care Eddie is doing for himself in this chapter!

Allowing Maddie in emotionally a teensy, weensy, bit and letting him take a : PROGRESS!

Coming to the slow realization that it’s easy for him to be critical of Maddie for things in Buck’s past and wnating Buck to be upfront because he wasn’t experiencing it , and(as you perfectly said) Buck doesn’t know HOW to be mad at Maddie because they have and probably will never have a “normal” sibling relationship: Good, soft pats on the head for you Eddie!

Standing his ground with Shannon and expressing his feelings: YOU TAKE THAT CUSTODY EDDIE. WE ARE SO PROUD OF YOU!

The Christopher scene killed me “I’m glad Mommy cancelled” and I don’t think Mommy loves me” 💔💔😩😩 and the fact that he was afraid that Eddie would think Chris calling Buck ‘Dad’ meant he wanted to replace Eddie: DEATH. I AM DEAD. Which is so little kid logic, but also 😭😭

The end was so sweet. But I don’t know if I feel comfortable with your ending line of “Eddie wasn't in any rush, he was pretty sure they didn’t have an expiration date” and the other line of “and that, too, would be something they’d have to talk about later because Buck’s quick jump into taking the blame for everything was as heartbreaking as it was growing old” I got my eyes on you. I am channelling my inner Admiral Akbar and sensing “This is a trap!”

Also, can I become an OC in this so I can just plug in the loose wires that make up Harvey’s brain and maybe just shake him a little?

Anyways, loved this chapter. Can’t wait to be destroyed next week

You're so sweet omg 😭 comments on AO3 AND here???? I'm so soft, I am but a puddle.

Eddie has grown so much!!!! It's slow progress but it's progress all the same! He's realizing that his family deserves to be cared about just because they're his family! He's starting to let Maddie in and maybe not be so harsh towards her (but always, ALWAYS, will choose Buck first. If she hurts him, for example, he might like her but she's not the one he's going to protect, so to speak).

The Shannon of it all!!!! I've been planning that little confrontation for a while now, and it was so nice to get to write it all down for once.

The little kid logic in Chris 😭 I have a lot of feelings about how the general fandom tends to write him as much younger than he actually is and!!! Eddie opening up that communication with him and trying *so hard* to create a space where Christopher feels heard is everything to me.

But omg lmao no this is not a trap. I am a big fan of happy endings and I promise that last line (when it comes to Buddie) was meant to be a nice, peaceful repreve from the general angst 😂

[catreginae]

I posted 465 times in 2022

That's 463 more posts than 2021!

340 posts created (73%)

125 posts reblogged (27%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@silvercaptain24

@catreginae

@spookybuu

@squigglywindy

@here4dragons

I tagged 430 of my posts in 2022

Only 8% of my posts had no tags

#just talking - 185 posts

#ask - 170 posts

#catreginae: thou shalt not fall - 161 posts

#anon - 69 posts

#linked universe - 59 posts

#alliankitty - 47 posts

#my writing - 31 posts

#lu warriors - 28 posts

#linked universe fanfic - 22 posts

#fanart - 17 posts

Longest Tag: 96 characters

#i'm one of those people who has separate folders in my emails just to make comments easy to find

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

An AU where Warriors joins last... because the chain has to find and rescue him.

After the War, but before the events of LU is kicked into motion, a group of people (can be traitors but I think it would more interesting if it was a group of citizens) take Warriors and uses him as ransom. They send his blood stained scarf as proof thst they actually have him.

Athena isn't convinced that the group is interested in sending him back safely, thinking that would just take the rupees and probably kill him once they have it since Warriors would undoubtedly be a witness.

Luckily for her though, a group of heroes have come looking for Warriors and she sends them to track down Warriors and get him back.

Cue the all the suspense and mystery. I'm not good with that kind of thing.

This idea is adoptable. If it speaks to you, it needs a good home. Just tag me if you decide to do something with it.

106 notes - Posted November 25, 2022

#4

Kat is an incredibly person and a wonderful writer (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠❤

Just saying that I admire you is too little,

You so precious than a crystal

Any altar I put for you will be too small,

For thou who always remain standing after so many has falls

Not even the most beautiful words could describe how amazing you are after all.

(⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠❤

Reblog if u agree♡

I just want to see how far this goes...

122 notes - Posted November 1, 2022

#3

AU where Warriors received a medical discharge months after defeating Ganon because he never truly recovered from his injuries. He's unable to stay on his feet long enough to fight, let alone hold his sword. Although Artemis offers him a place to stay in the castle because of his service, he finds hard to stay and ultimately retires to a small village in the countryside with Proxi where nobody really knows who he is. He survives on military benefits and rarely interacts with the other villagers, but they do check on him from time to time.

Warriors isn't exactly happy in retirement but he's more or less accepted it.

Until eight other heroes come to the village Warriors retired to and ask around for a hero named Link, and Warriors can't fathom why anybody would come looking for a broken hero like him...

138 notes - Posted September 29, 2022

#2

Another LU idea that I might not write because nothing is working out so far (because you know, my life).

At the end of Hyrule Warriors, Warriors just collapses. Could be all the collective injuries from taking down Ganon, combined with the exhaustion, and maybe a good ol' infected wound or two. Whatever the reason, he collapses in front of Mask and his condition isn't great.

And when it's time for all the time-displaced to go home, he still's unconscious.

Masks tries to fight against going home because he doesn't want to leave until he knows Warriors will be fine. He's forced back anyway. He leaves not knowing if Warriors even survived. He lives for years, wondering if Warriors is okay.

Come LU and Time gets to meet some of the other heroes, but Warriors isn't among them. He thinks to meet that mayb Warriors died after all and that's why he they haven't been reunited. However, he can't voice why he is so worried.

But Warriors just happens to be the last to join the chain. He pulled through just fine, trying to ignore the fact that a lot of his friends left and he never got to say goodbye.

203 notes - Posted September 5, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

As much as I like reading dissections of the fandom characterizations as they compare to canon, I think the more important thing is that people have fun and make the content they want so they keep improving their craft. People intentionally disregard canon all the time in any given fandom.

You don't have to drop system/DID Four just because Jojo isn't using it. If you like that headcanon, keeping using it as often as you would like. Canon isn't the end all be all, especially in fandoms. Just don't confuse canon and fanon and you should be fine.

267 notes - Posted April 12, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[iamnicodemus]

Let's get straight to the brass tacks;

This. Chapter. Rocked. There's very little about your prose, your turn of phrases, that I can say now that I've not already said a thousand times, but know that I was eating it up the whole time.

After the last chapter stabbed me in the heart, this was a perfect hope spot. The talk with Mobius was balm on that wound. I've said before how I love how you write him; his weary but supportive dad energy is so good 😭and I LOVE how much he cares about them.

This chapter was well worth the wait <3 so good to see this series back.

Would this be it? Were you truly broken beyond repair?

No, don't say that :'(

Maybe it was the fear of knowing you wouldn’t be able to live through another loss.

I'm not sure she'd survive the finale of Season 2 😬

There were telltales of a steady rhythm thudding beneath your skin and through your veins; the ghosts of it tickled your fingertips and called out your name. His heartbeat, as real as you’d pleaded for in countless sleepless nights.

Exquisite writing here.

Thor had once told Loki about the red string of fate—when the god of thunder had been strangely obsessed with Midgardian folklore in his teenage years. A red string that connected soulmates, it could stretch and bend as the two souls drifted apart and then met again, however, it would never break. Now, as Loki heard your steps getting further and further away from him, he couldn’t help but hear a snap.

he’d be okay with loving you from afar; so long as he got to love you at all. 

you cannot create lines like this and just expect me to be okay

You stared off into space, watching from a secluded corner table as a few of your colleagues walked by with their own coffees, yet not actually seeing it. Your mind was elsewhere, drifting between what-ifs.

The way they're both reacting the same way; despondent, out of tune with reality, a shell of themselves 💔

“But don’t you think that, sometimes, we complicate things too much?”

Amen 🙏

Oh, you couldn’t have been more wrong then. Because when he looks at you with that same shine to his gentle eyes that had captivated you since the first time you’d met him on the grounds of New Asgard, when his voice takes on that special tone that’s kept for you only, when he touches you with the same delicacy you’d always known, when he has the same bashful smile, laughs at the same jokes, drinks the same tea. How could he not be your Loki?

If this isn't the most beautiful thing 🥺

“Listen to me,” Mobius cut you off before you could go downhill into a pity party, “he’s miserable, okay?” He spoke matter-of-factly, to which you only raised your eyebrows. “I’m serious, you should’ve seen him this morning, looked like a kicked puppy. Trust me when I tell you you’re hurting him more by staying away.” He added with a smirk; “and you two are killing me with all this 'will they, won’t they’.”

THANK YOU, MOBIUS!

A familiarity lay heavy in the cold and fresh air, it has brought you peace many times before. The frozen grass crunched beneath your feet and the rustling of leaves did little to drown out the loud beating of your heart. You didn’t need to open your eyes to know where you were, but you did anyway. The clearing was the same as it’s always been, with a few trees on both of the far sides, a clean and starry night sky that adorned the beginnings of the spectacle that was the northern lights, and finally, the lonely wooden bench in the middle.

The fact that he came back here, to this place - this moment - they so briefly shared 🥺

You wondered if he’s missed you as much as you missed him.

Girl. Come on now.

From afar, you admired how Loki’s hair flowed effortlessly with the breeze, coming loose from behind his ears and making you wish to run your fingers through it.

Always a spare moment to appreciate how majestic he is

Looking forward to chapter nine. This delivered in spades.

what once was mine | ch 8

Loki x Reader

Series Summary: When watching what once was supposed to be the rest of his life, in an empty room in the TVA, Loki sees someone he can't recognize; a girl who's all tenderness and loose smiles, and most importantly, she was smiling at him.

A/N: Yes, this is long overdue and I'm sorry for the long wait; but now it's finally here and I hope you can enjoy it, we're nearing the end :'). If it's been too long since you've read the other chapters, I'd maybe recommend checking them out again because we're picking it up right where we left off. The next chapters will be posted soon <3. Also, Mobius plays cupid here and we love him for it lol.

Masterlist | Read ch 7 here

You kept your head down as you walked, not particularly looking at where you were going. Rogue tears were falling onto TVA's hallways with each step you took, a hand covered your mouth to stifle the sobs. The sight of your rapidly moving shoes became more unfocused by the second.

You needed an out, you needed to breathe. And you didn't care that the bathroom you rushed into was a communal one, you slammed the door shut behind you and turned the lock, praying that the stalls were empty.

Silence hung in the air, the only sound being your heavy breathing. Gulping back a massive lump in your throat, you leaned back against the closed door. The smooth wood was cold, feeling going past the fabric of your shirt and raising goosebumps on your skin. With the back of your hand, you tried drying your tears.

Would this be it? Were you truly broken beyond repair?

You wanted to shout apologies in the air; for the Loki you'd just found, he deserved it, he did nothing wrong; for yourself, for the bruised heart beating in your chest that you'd promised to mend.

Part of you also wanted to berate yourself for being overly sentimental and utterly incapable of processing your feelings. For being stuck in this limbo.

You pressed your palms to your eyes, feeling them dampening, fingers shaking.

His touch had been like a bonfire on a cold night—a strange metaphor, given the fact his skin was usually colder than yours; yet it held truth—it enveloped your heart in a warm and familiar embrace, the most blissful kind of pain. It hurt, you couldn't quite place why, but it did.

Maybe it was the fear of knowing you wouldn't be able to live through another loss.

There were telltales of a steady rhythm thudding beneath your skin and through your veins; the ghosts of it tickled your fingertips and called out your name. His heartbeat, as real as you'd pleaded for in countless sleepless nights.

And when you finally held it in your hands again…

'But you're not him.'

You regretted it, probably as soon as the words left your mouth. Because… they were a lie. A lie you told yourself for fear of losing him, again.

Yet now, you couldn't help but feel like you just did.

─── ·❆· ───

Thor had once told Loki about the red string of fate—when the god of thunder had been strangely obsessed with Midgardian folklore in his teenage years. A red string that connected soulmates, it could stretch and bend as the two souls drifted apart and then met again, however, it would never break.

Now, as Loki heard your steps getting further and further away from him, he couldn't help but hear a snap.

Maybe he was the one who fucked it up, maybe it was his fault. You weren't his to have or to lose anyway. As much as he wished you were.

Loki stood awkwardly by your desk; he felt almost as if he was invading just because this was your space and, as you'd just made abundantly clear, you wanted nothing to do with him anymore.

He took advantage of your secluded nook to brush off the tear tracks on his cheeks—he didn't need anyone asking questions he barely knew the answers to—before running a hand through his hair, straightening the collar of his jacket, and taking a deep, hopefully steadying, breath.

For the first time, he felt utterly lost, without a north to guide him. He stalled by neatly organizing the mess that was your desk, thinking maybe you'd have a change of heart and come back to him. He stacked documents, organized pencils, and even folded a cardigan of yours that was hanging on the back of your chair.

Loki stalled the longest he could, until there was nothing more to tidy and no hope left. When you didn't come back, he walked up to the elevator, and now stared at the many buttons without knowing which to press. Truth be told, his mind was miles away; focused on the feeling of your soft skin against his and the sweet perfume of your shampoo. Would he ever get to feel you so close again?

"Hold it, please," Mobius called from a few steps away, hurriedly walking towards Loki. The god extended a hand to hold the doors open for him.

Mobius skipped into the elevator with a big sigh, clutching a rather large stack of documents to his chest. "Thanks," he breathed, shooting a glance at Loki. A beat passed and he did a double take, with a frown as he looked Loki over, who still glared at the buttons in front of him, all puffy eyes and pouty lips. "… What happened?" Mobius' voice held the tone of someone who probably already knew the answer he'd get. He reached past Loki and pressed the button that led to the cafeteria—a coffee break couldn't hurt.

For long seconds, Loki kept silent, contemplating whether to lie or be honest. He felt too drained to come up with a lie. "I… believe I messed it up."

Mobius didn't need names. He raised a hand to pat Loki's shoulder. "She'll come around, buddy."

Loki's eyebrows softened, he had a faint, bittersweet smile on his lips as his eyes welled up with tears again. It stung, bitterly. Perhaps he was never destined for happy endings. It was okay, he decided, he'd be okay with loving you from afar; so long as he got to love you at all. He already counted his lucky stars that the slim odds were in his favor and he got to meet you. "I don't think she will."

The weight of his words didn't go unnoticed by Mobius, who turned to Loki with a rather bewildered expression. "You really do like her… Don't you?"

Loki lowered his head, lips parting in a futile attempt to try and word his feelings. All he managed was a defeated sigh as he brought a hand up to rub one of his eyes. That was answer enough.

─── ·❆· ───

It's been a week. Or at least what would be the equivalent of a week in the TVA. You didn't know if you were the one avoiding Loki or if he was the one avoiding you. But you haven't seen each other ever since you said those hurtful words to him.

Your spoon clicked against the ceramic of your mug, stirring a coffee that had probably already gone cold. You stared off into space, watching from a secluded corner table as a few of your colleagues walked by with their own coffees, yet not actually seeing it. Your mind was elsewhere, drifting between what-ifs.

It's been like this, for this past week. Your mind mostly numb, stuck on auto-pilot. You couldn't stop thinking about him, couldn't stop missing him; his presence had become such a constant in your life these past couple of months that now that you didn't have it, a part of you felt hollow and empty. There was always a vacant chair beside you that left you feeling perpetually cold and alone.

The last few nights had been more sleepless than not, guilt ate away at your insides and kept you from diving into deep slumber. You wondered if the few grimaced smiles you received from your colleagues today were because you'd forgotten to hide the faint dark circles under your eyes.

"Good morning sunshine," Mobius slid into the chair next to you, placing his steaming mug on the table along with a single donut on a small plate. He took a momentary glance at you and his smile dropped a tad, "or maybe not so good."

You tried giving your friend a decent smile but you could tell by the look on his face that it didn't reach your eyes.

"I'll probably regret asking," Mobius pulled his chair closer, taking a sip of his coffee before continuing, "but what's wrong?"

You've never liked it when people asked you that question, it made you wish that your problems really were simple enough to be put into words. You avoided his eyes, something akin to shame and timidness twisting your stomach. "I'm- I'm not sure," a frown came to your brows, as if you were finally seeing past the fog. You shook your head softly, "I think I messed up."

"So I keep hearing," Mobius sighed. It wasn't condescending, no; it just looked like he was in on a secret you didn't know.

"I'm just… I'm so scared, Mobius." There was a sway to your voice that wasn't there before, with your heart on your mouth beating as raw as the wound you'd carried for so long. "I'm-" You hesitated, words heavy as you closed your eyes briefly. "I'm scared, and I'm still so confused."

You could feel the familiar sting of tears building behind your eyes. "I've wanted him back for so long, and seeing him again like this, it just-" Your lips hovered, trembling. You felt a warm touch landing on one of your hands, reassuring. You squeezed Mobius' fingers in gratitude. "… Now I have memories with him that only I've lived, and part of me still doesn't know what to think, what to do. And if I ever were to lose him again, I- I don't think I could…"

With a gentle nod, Mobius took hold of both your hands, he spoke slowly, "I understand… Well, maybe I don't," he chuckled, and when a small and genuine smile crept onto your lips, a proud glint came to his eyes. "But don't you think that, sometimes, we complicate things too much?" He asked, voice tender and drowning out the increasing hustle and bustle of TVA's cafeteria.

"You got him back." Mobius gave your hands a gentle shake to accentuate his words, voice low yet dripping with hope and excitement; "Yeah, maybe he comes from a little before you two met, but it's still the same Loki." He tilted his head with a tight smile, urging you to take his words to heart. "The one thing you wanted ever since you got here, don't you see how lucky you are? Maybe you should just let yourself be happy about that for a change."

For long seconds that felt like hours, you stayed silent, only feeling the bruising beating of your heart against your ribs. The air left your lungs and you had trouble pulling it back in.

He was right, wasn't he?

Maybe you could allow yourself to be happy after all this time. Maybe you could finally go to where your heart had been trying to lead you to. Maybe you really did get a second chance.

Yet, like freefalling into a frozen lake, the last words you'd said to him came rushing back. "I hurt him, Mobius." You winced at the memory, at the desolate look that had painted Loki's eyes as soon as you uttered the words.

'But you're not him.'

Oh, you couldn't have been more wrong then. Because when he looks at you with that same shine to his gentle eyes that had captivated you since the first time you'd met him on the grounds of New Asgard, when his voice takes on that special tone that's kept for you only, when he touches you with the same delicacy you'd always known, when he has the same bashful smile, laughs at the same jokes, drinks the same tea. How could he not be your Loki?

"It was the last thing I wanted, and it happened, and now I- I don't know if there's a way back from-"

"Listen to me," Mobius cut you off before you could go downhill into a pity party, "he's miserable, okay?" He spoke matter-of-factly, to which you only raised your eyebrows. "I'm serious, you should've seen him this morning, looked like a kicked puppy. Trust me when I tell you you're hurting him more by staying away." He added with a smirk; "and you two are killing me with all this 'will they, won't they'."

A small laugh escaped you as you raised a hand to dry your eyes and squeezed Mobius' ones with the other in a gesture that you hoped conveyed the immense gratitude you felt for him.

You missed Loki. You missed him so much it felt like a part of your soul had been torn out.

"Do you have any idea of where he is right now?"

─── ·❆· ───

You stepped into the smoked glass doorway as if you were walking a tightrope that might snap at any second. You held your breath as you went through, eyes closed, and hands clammy.

A familiarity lay heavy in the cold and fresh air, it has brought you peace many times before. The frozen grass crunched beneath your feet and the rustling of leaves did little to drown out the loud beating of your heart. You didn't need to open your eyes to know where you were, but you did anyway.

The clearing was the same as it's always been, with a few trees on both of the far sides, a clean and starry night sky that adorned the beginnings of the spectacle that was the northern lights, and finally, the lonely wooden bench in the middle.

Loki sat on the far right side of the bench you once shared. The night was cold and he only wore a simple dress shirt, for a second you wondered if he was not cold, before remembering his origins.

The moment feelt intimate, precious. You wondered if he knew you were there and chose to stay silent, or if he was too lost in his own what-ifs. You wondered if he's missed you as much as you missed him.

Your feet were glued to the ground, you noticed. Hands closed tightly into fists and mouth dry. A part of you remained so afraid still, as if, now that you're here, it might be too late.

From afar, you admired how Loki's hair flowed effortlessly with the breeze, coming loose from behind his ears and making you wish to run your fingers through it. He had his left hand lying beside him, fingertips touching the wood of the bench; as if reaching for something, someone, who's not there.

You caught it then, how, with the corner of his eye, he finally noticed your presence. You caught it by how his shoulders immediately tensed up and he looked straight ahead as if bracing for something.

No turning back now. You took the first step towards him.

⋆* ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

Ch 9 coming soon.

I no longer make taglists. You can follow @talesofesther-library and turn notifications on to know when I've posted a new story/chapter.

Thank you for reading this little story. Feedback and reblogs are literally what keeps me motivated to continue posting here, so I’d appreciate it if you could take some time to reblog and comment. <3

You do not have permission to repost, copy, or translate my works on any platforms (even with credit), please respect.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

playful dress miss raven

HI 🤡 I wanted to do some doodles of Miss Raven in her own version of Stage in Playful Land’s costume.

Yes, I was too lazy to color-- I drew inspirations for the outfit design from the female dancing puppets in Disney's Pinocchio (since the new event heavily references this film), Doll from Black Butler's circus arc, and ballet in general. The specific ballet I looked at was Coppelia; it's about a boy who falls in love with a doll (the creation of a mad scientist. His fiancé, Swanhilda, then impersonates the doll in order to win his love back. I thought it fit well with the idea of the "human puppet" motif of the Playful Dress series.

BONUS DOODLES:

I like to think that Miss Raven got dragged along for the trip because she was busy chewing the group out for sneaking off campus... then Kalim (bless him) thinks she's feeling left out, so he tells her to come with them! "The more, the merrier!" (And hey, Ferro and Gidel won't say no to another poor unfortunate soul for their amusement park.) "F-Fine! I'll attend, but only so I can keep a watchful eye on you all! I intend to write a detailed report on your transgressions for the headmaster to review when we return."

"Yeah, yeah. You say that now, but I bet you'll be like a kid in a candy store once we actually get there." Ace rolls his eyes. "You spend so much time with your head buried in a book--it'll do ya some good to kick your feet up and do something different for a change."

"Gahahah! It sounds like she's excited for Playful Land!" Kalim grins broadly. "We're going to have so much fun together!" "I will do my best to assist in the documentation of this trip, Raven Crowley-san," Ortho offers. "Pictures, videos... I'll record them all, so we won't forget this anytime soon!"

... Anyway 🤡 Miss Raven has to help babysit the idiots (while trying to mask her own childish wonder as she experiences an amusement park for the first time). Oh, and J word and L*ona are there, so 💀 more trouble for her...

"Heh. You're staring at that roller coaster with big, sparkling eyes. If you want to ride it, then just say so." Leona says it with a smirk, a lilt of smugness to his suggestion. "There's nothing wrong with a kid being a kid."

"I-I'm not a kid! I'm just... admiring the composition of such an imposing metal structure!! There is nothing like it in the natural world."

Jade chuckles. "Would prefer to partake in one of the many games they offer here? Ah, and should you ever feel peckish, there is a selection of carnival fare to indulge in: caramel apples, popcorn, cotton candy--"

"All foods which would result in terrible toothaches if consumed in large quantities! And games? We haven't the time to enjoy such leisures."

"Oi, eel." A scowl from Leona. "Shameless of you to cut into our conversation, isn't it? I guess without the octopunk around to keep you on your leash you think it's fair game to act out in front of an upperclassman." "Oya? I don't recall there being a formal chaperone for this trip, Leona-san," he replies easily. "Fufu, perhaps you feel the need to preside over your juniors in the absence of the usual pack you dole orders to."

"Here's an order for you then: back off. You're killing my mood."

"As you wish. Come along, Miss Raven. We wouldn't want to disturb our dear senpai." "Dragging prey around like they're puppets on strings," Leona snorts, blocking the path. "You go. The canary stays. Our business isn't finished yet."

"Business?" Jade continues to smile. "Oh no, I would never mean to interfere with such a thing--but it's not truly business you're interested in, is it, Leona-san?"

"Funny. I was going to say the same of you."

"... You're both talking as though I'm not literally right here!!"

[penname-artist]

Listen man, they just leave and come back with headcanons, like stray cats leaving dead mice on my porch at two in the morning, okay? It’s not my fault that Kittyhawk just DECIDED this was his shit now. Anyways, here’s a few headcanons because I want him to shut the fuck up back here.

-Out of all the current day carriers, Kitty is probably one of the least professional among them. He’s a bit of an oddball out compared to the rest of them (as seen above) simply from his more laid-back, easygoing nature and “dad qualities”

-I’m willing to wager that because of the above, he’s probably also among the least qualified to have even upgraded to such a status. Or if he was, he only just barely squeaked by on it, and it kinda shows.

-He’s not actually a dad, though that’s probably something he would have liked to be pre-decision. But he is a kid guy, and a complete softie. Would probably make immediate besties with Dusty if he ever visited.

-Flysenhower is likely the first, if not only other carrier he’s actually gotten really close with, purely because while Flysenhower is his polar opposite, he’s still empathetic, and rather humbled by Kitty’s carefree vibe (just...he never admits that).

-In a humanized format, I literally think that he has a nature like OFMD’s Stede Bonnet. Truly, he has the vibe. (I bet you can guess then who Blackbeard’s equivalent is. By the way, hopefully, I will be making a short drabble around that like...one day. When I stop being burnt out and sad about my shriveled up brain)

-Naturally a *little* clumsy

-Would be the guy to wear Hawaiian flower shirts

-Has also probably had like three different mid-life and late-life crises, and the abrupt break in his bubbly nature to become practically depressed has put Flysenhower in a panic on more than one occasion.

[bbokkie]

Weak For Your Love

(Yoru x reader)

"Little lady you have me so weak, weak for your love."

Scenario: Phoenix and Jett help Yoru confess to GN! Reader !!

This fanfic is requested by @sleepless-nxghts ><

(Sorry this was deathly late, it's currently 11:30 and music is playing outside my house and it's honestly AGGRAVATING 😠. Sorry this was late again, I'm so busy during Thursday's - Sunday's. 💔 Anyways I wanted to do a thing where I put songs which helped me make fanfics, lyrics from songs surprisingly help me a lot with fanfic writing and I wanted to share you guys my cool ass music taste!!)

Song: Weak For Your Love by Thee Sacred Souls

Yoru actually never knew why he loved you, can you blame him though? A person like him would honestly be too stubborn to actually see and feel their own feelings, it might sound weird but highlighters with weird hair like Yoru doesn't really have a grasp on love or reality.

Most of the time he found you aggravating, the way you mostly never looked his way, the way you never usually talked to him, the way you never really batted him an eye. I guess that was why he found you annoying, it was because he never got your attention.

But there was something in you that made him stuck to you like a magnet, no matter how far he would try to run away from you, the magnet would pull him back.

He loved the minimum times that he actually got to interact with you, your gentle hands touching his brass skin as you mended his wounds. He loved your smooth yet firm voice you had which had him weak. He loved everything and anything about you yet he felt like he never even knew you.

In conclusion, he was undeniably weak for your love.

Phoenix kept catching his gaze wander off somewhere which wasn't his own mirror or something, yet to another table who had a single figure. At first Phoenix was worried he wanted to kill you, never in his entire life had he seen his friend deep in his thoughts while staring at someone with such intensity that wasn't the intensity of wanting to kill them.

Worried, Phoenix called over his other friend, Jett to see what was wrong with Yoru.

"What happened to him?" Jett asked. "I don't know, he's just staring at Y/n! I think he wants to kill them." Phoenix whisper-shouted. Jett looked at her friend's expression longer, trying to capture just what was going on in that tiny mind of his. "I think that's admiration." Jett whispered to Phoenix. "What!?" Phoenix whispered loudly which eventually caught Yoru's attention. "What are you looking at?" He asked. "Nothing. We were just waiting for you to stop staring at Y/n like you're obsessed with them or something." Jett rolled her eyes, sitting down. "What? I'm not obsessed. Stop spewing your bullshit." The male scoffed, defending himself all too quickly. "Chill, it's not like you like her, right?" Phoenix joked, sitting down shortly after Jett.

Then there was a short but telling silence.

"Right?"

"No way! You like them!" Jett pointed at Yoru, almost bursting into laughter. "No I don't! What gave you that idea!?" The male shouted. The more he denied it, the bigger the blush dusting his cheeks would grow. The more he denied it, the more Jett and Phoenix knew of his feelings. "How many times do I have to tell you! I don't like them!" The male grew angry and stormed off shortly after being laughed at by his own friends. "Come back! Don't go!!" Phoenix laughed as his friend walked away, his figure shrinking by the seconds.

Yoru never really liked opening up to other people especially about love. He wanted to keep his feelings away from everyone, he never wanted anyone to know what emotional layers awaited them. But now, two of the most obnoxious and loud people know that he has a teensy crush. This was definitely going to be an annoying journey.

"You should totally confess." Jett smiled. "Hell no!" Yoru said quickly. "We'll help you!" Phoenix offered. "You two will do nothing but mess it up anyway." The male grumbled. "So so you do like them." Jett gasped. "That's not what I meant!" The male's cheeks flushed of red as he tried his best to hide his feelings which obviously and painfully failed.

"Come on, if you don't confess, I'll tell them you like them." Jett threatened. Yoru had a foul expression on his face, he was practically backed up in a corner with no escape. "Fine. But you better make it good." Yoru finally gave up, submitting the future of his relationship with you to Jett and Phoenix. He basically either signed up for rejection or something that could really spark and change his life.

"Okay so maybe like in the rooftop?" Phoenix suggested. "What, and let Yoru push them off?" Jett joked. Yoru just sat there with no clue of what was happening or what year it was, he sat there listening to Jett and Phoenix's stupid ass ideas that would practically lay out his entire love life.

"Okay, maybe outside the building? Y'know, where the trees are? Trees are romantic, right?" Phoenix said. "Plausible, surprisingly." Jett nodded.

Yoru was basically in his own world, he was thinking of how to confess to you and what to say. If he hadn't put on a poker face, his expression would be the equivalent of "panic"

"So it's settled, now we just need fancy words for him to say." Jett clapped. "Don't worry, Yoru. I had to make an essay about Shakira- I mean Shakespeare when I was in highschool. That dude knows lots about fancy words." Phoenix nodded confidently.

"Say something casual." Jett suggested. "Yeah, don't recite Shakespeare!" Phoenix slammed his fist on the table. "Maybe ahh.. I really like you, if you're free maybee let's bang?" Phoenix snickered. "Shut up, Phoenix!" Jett shouted. "I know what to say already, are we done here?" Yoru sighed. "What is it?" Jett asked. "None of your business, now can I go?" Yoru stood up. "Okay, okay! Let's just revise the plan once more!" Phoenix said, pulling Yoru back down to his seat.

The day finally came, the day where Yoru would finally confess his feelings to you.

Jett asked you to come out the building 8 minutes before the supposed confession. She made up a stupid lie that there was a new agent outside. When she came into your room she was all giddy and excited. She told you to meet someone outside the building. Without much to do you followed her instructions and went outside the building shortly after she left.

"Okay, you remember the plan?" Phoenix whispered. "Yes, you told it to me 7 times in the past 30 minutes." Yoru rolled his eyes. "Give this to her." Phoenix said, pulling out a flower. "A flower?" Yoru scoffed. "Do you want a partner or what?" Phoenix rolled his eyes, shoving the rose into his palms. Jett quickly went back to her friends, telling them the news. "Okay, she's coming!!" Jett giggled. "Go get em rift walker!" Jett whooped, shoving the male out the bush. Yoru grumbled profanities but got out of the bush.

"God, he walks so awkwardly." Phoenix commented.

As minutes pass, you finally came out the building. You looked around and it was dead silent. In the middle was Yoru looking down on the ground embarrassed.

"Evening, Yoru." You smiled which made him jump. "What're you doing here?" You asked. "I just- wanted to ask you something." The male stumbled. "Go on, you can tell me." You chuckled. "Phoenix.. wanted me to give you this." He pulled the rose from his back, giving it to you. You giggled. "Is Phoenix the one who likes me, or do you?" You said, the male froze. "I really like you, Y/n." He mumbled, underneath the moonlight you saw his cheeks flush of red as his bashful eyes averted away from yours. You smiled to yourself, in the light he looked so pretty. "I like you too, Yoru."

You have my heart inside your hands

Baby, be careful what you do with me

(yorulover99 back at it again with another humourous banger 😎😎 make sure to smash that like button and subscribe for bangers like these!!?)