#anyway. B and I ended up dating shortly after lmao | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ectonurites · 3 years ago

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i’m SO interested in timkon from kon’s perspective!!! i haven’t read almost anything from dc so 90% of what i know is from meta on tumblr and all the context i have is literally everyone going “walking bi flag superboy and twink robin are in love, trust me on this” but then all the “proof” of (non-52) kon being into dudes (aside from *gestures at him*) is about bart?? so i’m like ok maybe this is an unrequited thing, but then everyone is going “kon is crying screaming throwing up bc tim has a boyfriend and it’s not him!!!” and i’m like ok i’m gonna believe you guys, i’m invested at this point, but y’all tricked me with the coffee thing so i’m keeping an eye open for selenur

LMAO. Okay so I do wanna say that like, the way I view things with them probably isn't necessarily the way everyone in the fandom does, especially because.... tumblr DC fandom in particular is not renowned for reading the comics and looking at things in context, versus I read a lot of comics and somehow retain a lot of the information (as is evident if you follow me/see my posts go around). Also as a whole, I feel like a lot of fan content with Timkon comes from a Tim-centric POV rather than having as much deep digging into Kon's thoughts + content (understandable in some ways because his solo? very uncomfortable a lot of the time!).

Before digging into things, disclaimer: I'll be talking a bit about Kon's dating history, and Kon at age 16 dated Tana, a 23 year old woman (he also dated another adult woman, Knockout, but that doesn't really come up as much here). It's fucked up, it's not a good thing, I hate that it's something that happened. But when talking about Kon's relationships it's not something I can like... ignore or gloss over, ya know? Because it was a big thing for him for a while and is part of his story. I just want it clear that like... while i'll be talking about it seriously as one of his relationships, it's something I actively dislike. But it's not something the narrative has him treat as bad, so when talking about Kon's perspective it might not come across as negatively as I personally view it, if that makes sense?

Anyways, the way I see things, Kon potentially developing feelings for Tim doesn't really happen until after Kon comes back to life (and even so not in a way I think he'd be at all that aware of), which places it pretty shortly before the end of the pre-reboot world. I think there are like, things that built into it earlier, which I will go into, but as a whole a lot of this is in far more subtle ways than the more obvious moments we can point to for Tim having feelings for Kon.

This post is incredibly long and probably kinda disjointed, just a fair warning 🤷‍♂️

Quick note that I don't usually like the "proof" phrasing that you brought up in the ask, anon, when discussing these sorts of things. I prefer to approach posts I make like this from an angle of supporting/explaining a reading/interpretation of the text, rather than necessarily "proving" something. What I've laid out here is a lot of how I interpret things, based on looking at Kon's history and the connections that I've noticed across it, rather than saying anything all that definitively.

To start I want to discuss some of Kon's dating history. Kon has two long-standing love interests (Tana and Cassie) and then a lot of smaller shorter-lived ones, some of these shorter ones are still rather impactful (for better or worse) and I've done a more in-depth list of his love interests that goes into all of them before here, but the two longer ones are gonna be more brought up/relevant to this post. One thing that his relationships with Tana and Cassie have in common versus his shorter more fling-like romances is him considering the girl a best friend/close friend first. Obviously this doesn't mean 'ah yes he falls in love with everyone he considers a best friend' but it's a present component of the relationships that are most impactful for him.

Tana is someone he meets basically right out of the cloning tube- they meet in Adventures of Superman #501 which is the first issue focusing on him. There's immediate aesthetic attraction obviously, but over the course of the craziness that is Reign of the Supermen they become and remain best friends, not moving into dating territory until his solo comic afterwards. He's on Young Justice with Cassie for a while where she has very clear feelings for him from before the moment she met him- but he doesn't start to actively show feelings for her until after a very specific moment- when Tana is murdered in front of him and Cassie during Sins of Youth (Superboy #74). After Tana's death, Kon begins getting overprotective of Cassie in ways that actively annoyed her (in Young Justice #29 she complains about it) and at the end of the comic he confesses feelings (in Young Justice #55).

I think 'it's a significant traumatic event that sparked him feeling more for her than he had before' is the main takeaway I want to highlight here. Because then, as we enter the Teen Titans run, Conner is hit with this big traumatic revelation about himself... with his best friend Tim right there with him (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #1).

Quick recap of some Tim & Kon stuff before this point, because their friendship had been a kinda complicated thing. Their first meeting had them pitted against one another because of Poison Ivy before eventually managing to work together, and the two started getting on each other's nerves pretty quickly once Young Justice starts rolling. It's very clear Kon thinks Tim has a stick up his ass, and Tim thinks Kon doesn't know how to take anything seriously. It's also clear imo that Kon from pretty early on wants Tim to think highly of him/respect him (like how when Batman told him that Robin thinks highly of him, Kon immediately parrots it back to the alternate universe Bruce as one of his first ways to self-identify in Superboy #60) and does think pretty highly of Tim too (thinking about Young Justice #3 at the halloween party the way Kon & Bart are so quick to defend Tim) even if he's hard-pressed to admit it.

The primary thing that holds Tim & Kon back from being closer in this whole era is the lack of trust because Tim won't share much about himself. This blows up between them on Apokolips with their big fight, and Kon's talk with Linda afterwards (in Young Justice #38) makes it clear how much he really does care about Tim & their friendship despite the tension they had.

Linda: You said it fine. So... what are you doin' up here? Conner: Thinkin'. Linda: About what? Conner: I dunno. Stuff. Linda: Boy, it's like pulling teeth with you sometimes, y'know that? Conner: I was just thinkin' about what went down on Apokolips during the war. Robin and I, well... We had words. Linda: I take it they weren't all nice ones. Conner: I said I don't trust him. Linda: Ouch. Conner: And ignored his orders. Linda: Double ouch. Conner: And implied he might be collecting files on us like Batman with the J.L.A. Linda: Mortal wound there, kid. Conner: Screwed up big time, didn't I? Linda: That's the problem with wartime, kid. For every person who covers himself with glory, there're a hundred guys who cover themselves-- and others-- with dirt. Conner: Or wounds. Like that one on your belly looks really nasty, you know? Linda: As okay as someone who nearly got herself disemboweled can be. Conner: Guess, in a way, me and Robin and the others were lucky, huh? Linda: In a way, yeah. On the other hand, some of the deepest wounds are the ones you can't see. Conner: *Sigh* You got that right. (Young Justice (1998) #38)

Once World Without Young Justice happens and Tim's name is out in the open, the big tension between them is gone and that really marks where I think they more mutually start seeing each other as best friends (but worth noting- Kon had called Tim his "ex-best friend" in Superboy #92 right after their fight on Apokolips- so as far as I can tell from what I've read, he thought of Tim as his best friend first- even in that era with their lack of trust)

Anyways, yes. So they are established best friends when we get to things like Graduation Day (where Kon drops his defensiveness as soon as he realizes how not okay Tim is during their scene in the closet together in #2)/the dissolving of Young Justice after Donna's death, and then the start of the Teen Titans run where they find out about the Lex thing together.

Now, to relate this back to the stuff with Cassie- finding out 'surprise! Lex Luthor is one of your clone parents' is a very different type of trauma than witnessing a death of a loved one, but Kon's reactions in these situations I think correlate, just matching what the trauma was. After witnessing Tana die in front of him and Cassie, he becomes overprotective of Cassie because he doesn't want something like that to happen to her too. After finding out this new traumatic thing about himself with Tim, he becomes pretty emotionally dependent on Tim because he's the only other person that knows/understands what's going on. It's Kon latching onto the other person who was present in a way that makes him feel better about what happened, and growing much closer to them in the process.

Kon's emotional dependency on Tim in this era I think is exemplified by the way he reacted to Tim quitting Robin & Steph stepping into the role- he's a jerk about it to Steph, and gets very upset about it around Tim.

Conner: So you approve of this new Robin? You want her to be in the Titans? Tim: I don't have anything to do with it. But she's a strong young woman. She really is. Conner: It's your ex-girlfriend, isn't it? Spoiler or whatever she used to call herself. Tim: Let it go. Conner: You're my best friend, Tim. How can I? The Titans aren't the Titans without Robin. They just aren't. Tim: Just because I'm not wearing a cape doesn't mean we can't hang. Conner: It won't be the same. I've heard that from too many friends I never talk to anymore. Jack: Tim, opening credits are rolling. Tim: Dad! Dad, this is-- Jack: What? Tim: ...Nothing. I'll be down in a minute. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #14)

One little detail here that I know is just Johns not being aware of how things were actually going in the Robin book (something clear from this entire arc) but that always sticks out to me is Kon just jumping to assume Steph is Tim's ex when they hadn't actually had a proper breakup- absolutely not one that Tim could have told Kon about considering Tim & Steph were in fine standing before he quit Robin and he apparently hadn't communicated with Kon since that happened. Kon just really is placing his frustration on her, in a way that... I dunno. I think he'd be upset like this at anyone else aside from Tim being in the Robin costume, but the way he highlights who she is feels oddly targeted. Because he knows this new Robin has a personal connection to Tim too, it's like him going "You're my best friend and you're abandoning me, but because this girl is/was your girlfriend you're just gonna let it happen."

Obviously though, this situation gets resolved and Tim comes back into the Robin role, and their friendship picks back up (with Kon confidently saying "I knew it," when Tim calls to tell him he'd be coming back in Teen Titans #15). But they're still keeping this secret, and it's still this heavy thing weighing on Kon. Kon tries to be there for Tim when he's got bad things going on (Jack's death) but Tim has a much harder time letting himself depend on Kon. Also all the Titans Tomorrow shit happens, and everyone's gotta grapple with that possible future. Eventually we get to the "Do you think I have a soul?" conversation, where everyone on the team's bravery about coming forward with their secrets inspires Kon to finally do the same- before it all goes wrong. Lex takes over, Kon attacks the team, and is then plagued with guilt because he hurt the people he cares about.

And while he mentions everyone in his monologue bit after he'd quit the team and was hiding out in Smallville, we only see recaps of two, Tim and Cassie, as he talks about them: "I broke Tim... and I... I hurt Cassie... I hurt her." (in Teen Titans Vol. 3 #26). Plus during his whole mind/soul journey with Raven in the same issue, he again specifically highlights the two of them.

Being in any way responsible for harm coming to Cassie has been basically one of his biggest fears ever since what happened to Tana. And Tim is the person he's been relying on emotionally the most in recent times because of knowing about stuff with Luthor. So these two together are just this huge focus for him in terms of the guilt, they're grouped together in his mind, at this point they're his most important people. (and even after he dies and comes back, when he talks about this with Cassie later in Adventure Comics (2009) #2... he once again specifically brings up Tim and her separately while grouping everyone else together)

Now, shortly after this is when Infinite Crisis gets rolling, Superboy-Prime first attacks, all sorts of shit happens, Kon and Cassie fuck consummate their relationship in the barn before the final battle gets going- and then Kon dies in her arms after saving everyone. Tim gets there too late to say goodbye, we know the drill. Thus sparking the One Year Later era where we learn about Tim and Cassie both spectacularly failing to cope in even remotely healthy ways, etc etc. These are the things that you dig into for how Tim feels about Kon.

For the point of this post though, discussing how Kon feels about Tim, we've gotta fast forward to once he's back. Worth noting such things as 'all of the year after Infinite Crisis, the OYL era, most of Final Crisis, and everything in between' happens in that time he's gone, which causes a lot of change in both Cassie and Tim.

When Conner comes back, it's not like... everything just fits back into place exactly the same as it was before, for him it feels like he's been gone days but for them it's been well over a year (and a crazy eventful one at that). Cassie has become leader of the Titans, she's got responsibilities and is definitely a bit more hardened by the things she's lost, and getting people back doesn't just undo all the grief. Tim has gone off the deep end in ways because of just how many losses he experienced in such close succession (and while some people come back, they don't all for him), and is throwing himself into his search for Bruce. Meaning that neither of the two incredibly-important-to-Kon dynamics are what they used to be, and that forces him to approach things in a new way.

Alongside that he’s also back in full force dealing with the Lex/Clark angst. We find out about the lists he keeps comparing traits of each clone parent, and Cassie immediately catches onto the way he's trying hard to push himself into following Clark's path of life in Adventure Comics (2009) #2. Cassie tells Kon about the kiss that happened between her and Tim (while very specifically saying the reasoning behind it happening was her and Tim both missing him), and they reconcile their relationship but it's clear… things there are different now, because everyone and everything's changed, but that doesn't mean they should waste any of the time they have together.

And then the following issue is his first moment reconnecting with Tim. Where he sees how closed off and distant Tim’s being, how much he’s letting guilt destroy him, how much things aren’t the same between the two of them anymore… and Kon even says it’s freaking him out the way Tim’s acting. Eventually we get to the big moment, where Tim admits he tried to clone Conner.

Tim: My girlfriend died. My dad died. My best friend died. And I couldn't accept it. I couldn't lose you too. Conner: So what? Tim: I tried to clone you. Conner: Tim- Tim: But I failed. Like I failed everyone else. Conner: Tim, even if it'd worked, it wouldn't have been me. Tim: That's what Cassie said. And I know that. I know it wouldn't have been you, Conner, but... but it would've been something. Conner: Man, between everything you've gone through, Cassie's gone through, and Bart's gone through, I picked a really suck-ass year to be gone, didn't I? Tim: The worst. I am so screwed up right now. (Adventure Comics (2009) #3)

Even though I don’t think Tim was consciously aware of it, this moment was... Tim admitting the extent of his feelings for Conner in a subtle specific way that Conner would have been able to pick up on. I’ve gone into this in more detail here- but back when Tana had died in front of Conner and Cassie, Kon's immediate reaction was "No! There must be a way to save her... Bring her back... Clone her!" (in Superboy #74). To do the exact same thing Tim tried to do.

Back in Superboy #92, the instance where it really feels like Kon has feelings for Bart he just doesn't know how to grapple with, he phrases things like "Or some Freudian thing where I secretly think of Impulse as a chick-" in his head, and I feel like here in this instance he'd be having the reverse sort of thought- "Is this some thing where Tim secretly thinks of me like I thought of Tana?"

This is kinda the point where I start to see a... shift, in how Kon thinks about Tim- or rather it's that Kon is thinking more about what Tim thinks of him. (I'll get back to that idea later- but I want to cover some events of things that happen in chronological order.)

But even though Tim's not in a good place here clearly, once things are more out in the open Kon can see that even though they each are different and things maybe aren't the same anymore, much like how he and Cassie could reconcile- he and Tim can figure their stuff out too.

Presumably in-universe next the rest of Boy of Steel happens and Tim shows up again there with the whole core four reunited at the end as Kon throws his journal in the fire. Then we get into Blackest Night- where Kon has to face his own mortality in a complex way and Cassie's the one there to help him, strengthening their bond.

Over in Red Robin in the Collision arc Tim and Kon have their reuniting moment on much better terms once Tim has found proof about Bruce and everything- and we get the very well known hug scene, where Conner affirms to Tim that all he ever needs to do is yell for him and he'll be listening. A short while later now that Tim's not fully isolating himself he actually calls upon his friends to help with the Ra's stuff. Things are looking good with them again- but even so Tim's still not around full time.

In the Teen Titans book, around this time Conner and Bart officially rejoin the team, and there starts to be some tension between Conner and Cassie in a new way- where her feelings for Conner start seeming to get in the way of her being able to lead the team and make tough calls on the field, because she's too preoccupied worrying about him. Over in Conner's solo content he's also further trying to adjust to being back in Smallville, and doing some more reflection on his life and who he is- the stuff I was talking about over in parts of this post about these concepts of 'normality' and what that means for him. By the end he reaches a point of acceptance that he doesn't need to be 'normal', but while things are ongoing he's trying to figure out just... what it is he's really doing in Smallville, what life he wants to live.

And so this combination of things leads to Conner breaking up with Cassie

Conner: I meant what I said earlier. I'm not going anywhere. I'll always be a Titan and I'll always be here for you. But-- I think it would be best for both of us if we stopped seeing each other. Cassie: What? Conner: You want to focus on leading this team and me... Well I want to try having a life that isn't only about being Superboy, Isn't only about Wonder Girl. I want to have a life as Conner too. Something simpler. Normal. I need that right now. Cassie? I figure this was coming anyway. Thought I'd make it easier for both of us. Right? Cassie: Sure. Yeah. Conner: I still love you, Cassie. Cassie: I love you. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #91)

So now Conner is in this place where he is single for the first time in a long time, and he's starting to do a lot of thinking and reflection on his life so far- figuring out who he is outside of just a superhero. The very next issue of Teen Titans is the crossover with Red Robin, and Conner is pushing hard the whole time on how happy he is to have Tim back around (and ultimately Tim does rejoin the team). This is also where we get this well known scene between the two of them:

Damian: Here's another one for you, clone boy. Conner: Seriously-- how do you put up with that little snot? Tim: I don't. I try to limit my contact with Robin as much as possible these days. Conner: Wish I could do the same. Still refuse to call him by your name. I don't care what costume you or him wears. As far as I'm concerned, you're my Robin, always will be. Tim: And you'll always be my clone boy. Conner: On second thought, maybe we should trade both of you in for Batgirl. I hear she's good. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #92)

Where Conner is acting similarly in a way to how he did back when Stephanie was the one in the Robin costume- refusing to really even acknowledge anyone else in the role because to him that should be Tim. One thing I do also notice here is that... Conner says this sweet thing to Tim, which probably comes off a little more intense than he was intending it to (the 'my Robin' phrasing), but when Tim throws something similar back at him in a teasing tone (by taking Damian's insult and making it a term of endearment) Kon immediately redirects the subject with a joke... which makes me think back to Superboy #92 where Kon writes everything off he's maybe feeling about Bart as a joke. Kinda like he went "Woah- that interaction was very tender there for a second, and I don't know how to deal with that besides making a joke," ya know?

Especially if we consider the earlier notion I presented of 'he's thinking a lot more about what Tim thinks of him' and that being something he's just not sure how to approach or think too deeply about (like to question why he's now grown this concerned with Tim's opinion on him), so him switching gears quickly to keep avoiding it... checks out! Conner's not in a place to approach any of that sort of thing yet, he's still figuring out his basic place in the world.

Which brings us to one of my favorite more overlooked moments of Tim & Kon together, from Superboy Vol. 5 #6, where they talk on the Titans Tower rooftop at 5am about their places in the world, Conner being unsure if Smallville's really the right place for him- or rather how much longer Smallville will be the right fit. It's also showing Tim and Conner having their... their trust and dynamic back, now, even after everything that's happened.

The following issue though is the reason I keep harping on this concept of "Conner is thinking a lot about what Tim thinks of him," because Superboy Vol. 5 #7 is where Conner gets affected by a Red Mercy, an alien plant that causes the person it latches onto to experience their worst nightmares come true (the exact opposite of the Black Mercy- a plant that causes the person affected to experience their dreams come true, from the famous Superman story 'For The Man Who Has Everything'). Within this nightmare world, Kon discovers he had betrayed everyone and was embracing his Luthor side, he had done something to (presumably killed) Cassie, had killed Bruce and many others... and Tim is leading a resistance against him, with a mission to kill him. When the nightmare progresses, another thing happens right in front of Kon: Tim is shot and killed.

Which means that among the fears we already knew about, like being turned into Luthor's monster... some of Kon's other worst nightmares/greatest fears are the concept of Tim hating him and the thought of seeing Tim die. These are things they specifically devoted page space to, out of all the possible fallout that could have come from Conner switching sides (even Cassie who has been consistently shown as one of the most important people to him doesn't show up here, we're just told he did something to her).

Conner: Tim? Why are you dressed like that? What's going on? Please... just stop for a minute so we can figure this all out. Tim: You had your chance to talk. You had your chance to stop this. And every time, you deceived us... betrayed us. You destroyed everyone we care about... you destroyed this entire town. No more talking... Elongated Lass, hold him. Hawklad, Negative Boy... kill him. Conner: This is insane! Something's wrong Tim... This can't be real! I don't remember Anything! Tim: Take him down! Hawklad: What's the matter, Kent, suddenly growing a conscience? Or are you just mad that you're finally the one being hunted?! Conner: [I need to find Psionic Lad. I was with him... maybe he can help... If he's even still alive.]

Conner: I... I don't want to hurt you guys. Just stop so we can figure this out! Tim: Don't listen to him! Everything he says is a lie! I bet you think you're just going to tear through us like you did the others, don't you? Conner: Tim, I don't-- Tim: Well I've got a surprise for you, Conner... A unique cocktail of the Bane Venom and Hourman's Miraclo formula is coursing through me. Bruce managed to synthesize it before he died. Before you killed him! Conner: Tim... Don't... Tim: "Don't"? "Don't"?! After everything you've done? After what you did to Cassie? Conner: C-Cassie?

Conner: Tim! Tim: Arrgh! Conner: No! Simon: Don't worry, Conner... I'm on it. Conner: Simon?! Negative Boy: I'm gonna kill you Valentine!!! Simon: Whatever, freak. (Superboy Vol. 5 #7)

I think it was worth noting that Kon's scream of Tim name as he was killed was... literally put in a different color for emphasis. This was also the case with the other person we see killed during this whole nightmare dream thing a little later: Lori, Kon's kinda cousin on the Luthor side. Aside from those two the other person who nearly gets hurt/killed is Ma while Luthor tries to manipulate Kon into doing it. So the bonds that we see as most important to him here, the ones he's at this point most afraid of losing/fucking up... are his family, and Tim.

So... yeah, Tim and Tim's opinion of Kon is very clearly prominent in his mind at this point if an evil space plant so strongly latched onto that as a piece of all this! Whether that's something Conner's choosing to acknowledge/analyze or not, it's there. To me the place it makes sense for that to have started being something on Kon's mind is back where I first brought this idea up- Adventure Comics #3 when Kon may have been comparing Tim's reaction to his death with Kon's own reaction to Tana's. I can just see that as... sparking a train of thought that just kinda keeps going even if he's trying to ignore it. And once Conner and Cassie cut things off, while she's still obviously important to him, she apparently doesn't reach the level of importance in his subconscious that she'd physically show up in this sort of thing while Tim does.

Anyways, since this places us really close to the end of the pre-reboot world, there's really not that much more with the two of them together afterwards, just a few interactions over in Teen Titans like Tim trying to reaffirm Kon how he can as they're stuck going against some clones of him at the end:

Conner: Look at him, Tim. Looks just like I did. Tim: They're not you, Conner. Conner: Aren't they? Didn't I start out the same way? A blank slate? Tim: It's not who you were, it's who you are. You have a life, and friends, and a family. Conner: Good point. I have a lot. And I aim to keep it that way. (Teen Titans Vol. 3 #100)

And then I mean, reboots happen, Kon's gone for a hot sec, and now he's back since Young Justice 2019. Conner's one of the only people who for sure remembers all this above stuff I just mentioned, his memories of the pre-Flashpoint world are untouched because he was absent for the reboots. Meaning even as Tim's feelings and memories have changed and been taken away and restored... Kon's have been exactly how they were, just with the added layer of "Kon has missed everyone while he was stuck on Gemworld." Since coming back there wasn't all that much focus on just the two of them from Kon's side, until the little bit we got in Urban Legends actually:

Conner: You know, I think I heard from you more when I was dead. Tim: Superboy? Stephanie called you, didn't she? Conner: She's worried. Thinks you're acting weird. I told her it must be a day ending in Y. Tim: You wouldn't call if you weren't worried, too. Conner: What's going on, Tim? Who's Bernard? Tim: He's a... friend. He's in trouble. Conner: Can I help? What do you need? Tim: ...I don't know, Conner. (Batman: Urban Legends #5)

This interaction as a whole just fascinates me, and Fitzmartin's choice to include it in Tim's coming out story in general. Conner's line about when he was dead just... to me that has read since this dropped as "I know you were so desperate to have me around when I was dead that you tried to clone me, but now that i'm here again you're barely talking to me." Which... lots to unpack there combined with all the questions and Kon's clear concern... especially if we consider the 'saying you tried to clone me was kinda like an informal confession of feelings' idea as something in the back of Conner's mind. With him now seeming... kinda frustrated/concerned that Tim's not paying even close to that kind of attention to him anymore. Him asking about Bernard like this and getting such vague answers from Tim (as Tim's being in general cagey and avoidant) also just makes me really curious about how Kon will like, respond to finding out Bernard is now Tim's boyfriend, I can just see so many different ways it could go.

But anyways, basically.... my ultimate point in all of this is less to say there's a definitive "Yes, Kon is 100% clearly in love with Tim" indication, but more to point out "There's a framework here to support the idea of Kon having thoughts/feelings for Tim comparable to those he's had for love interests in the past," if that... ah... makes sense?

Anyways if you read all of this- I hope it even remotely made sense!

#okay i can't reread and edit this anymore my brain will melt #u wanted thousands of words of me talking abt timkon? u got it #sam explains

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lucky-peoqle · 4 years ago

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Hi! Can you do a teen! Bill x reader? I also recently rewatched the it movies and I just wanna read some Bill Denbrough imagines (*ﾟ∀ﾟ*)

a/n; i'm slowly getting through requests,,, this week is my last week of online school so send in requests bc this summer is gonna be BORING <3

fandom: it (2017)

character: bill denbrough

warnings: swearing,,, underage drinking (not even a full bottle, just a swig)

summary: the losers are having their annual out of school sleepover. they end up playing truth or dare, accidentally having the reader's true feelings for bill released :)

truth or dare

the losers sat in a circle, daring each other to do the stupidest things they could think of, and getting the juiciest of secrets spilled. you sat between mike and stan, laughing your asses off.

the game was all fun in games until richie dared eddie to do something that he wasn't fond of. the dare consisted of something like lick the toilet seat that sat in the bathroom next to bill's room.

"i'm not licking a fucking toilet seat rich!" eddie exclaimed.

"oh come on eds, all you have to do is put your tongue on it! you don't even have to lick it," richie urged.

"do you know what i could catch from that! i refuse to do it. choose something else."

richie rolled his eyes, "fine."

he looked around, his eyes meeting yours. he smirked, which worried you, and looked back at eddie.

"kiss y/n."

"what?" you, eddie, and bill all blurted out.

you looked over at bill and gave him a look. you quickly shook it off and looked back at richie.

"you heard me. kiss y/n," he said, "she's not that bad of a kisser. i know from experience," he winked at you, causing mike to laugh, you hitting his shoulder.

"b-beep beep, ri-richie," bill muttered.

"it was in 2nd grade richie. calm yourself," you laughed.

"anyway, stop being a pussy eds. kiss her already!"

eddie quickly glanced at bill and gave him an, "i'm sorry" look and made his way over to you, kneeling down in front of you.

he quickly pecked you on the lips, pulling away with a red face. the losers whooping and whistling in the background.

eddie quickly went back to his seat, in between ben and bill, whispering something in bill's ear.

"eddie, your turn," stan piped up.

"okay, umm, ben! i dare you to take a sip of the beer bev brought with her."

ben looked over at bev, who handed him the bottle, him taking a quick swig from it. he shook his head and made a face of disgust.

"how do people drink this stuff," he laughed, handing the bottle back to bev.

the game went on. richie decided someone had to end up licking the toilet seat, so he dared mike. mike sighing, but doing the dare anyway.

richie ended up having to yell out the window and proclaim his love for eddie. stan doing something like giving a mini fashion show, using blankets each loser brought from there own humble abodes.

bev had to tell the losers who she liked in each grade up till now, causing richie to laugh at her choice in men. beverly not hesitating to beat his ass.

the game was slowly coming to a stop as the group got tired. the person who had to ask the infamous question next was ben.

"y/n, truth or dare?"

"hmm... truth," you said, getting tired of picking dare almost every round.

"if you could date one person in the room, who would it be?"

"oh that's easy! it'd be richie," you stifle a laugh.

"WHAT?!" each loser shouts in disbelief.

"i'm kidding! it'd be bill...," you mutter quickly.

"who would it be?"

"BILL! IT WOULD BE BILL!" you shout, getting tired of the interrogation.

"yeah, get some bill!" bev laughed.

you looked at bill, his face just as red as yours. he smiled at you, you smiled back.

'maybe he does like you back?' you think to yourself.

"oka-"

"bill, truth or dare!" eddie asks.

"hey! it's my turn!"

"just trust him," stan whispers in your ear.

"u-uh.. dare?"

"i dare you to kiss your crush," eddie smiles widely.

you think he's going to turn to beverly, because you see them flirting from time to time, but bill stands up and walks over to you, planting a kiss on your lips.

you kiss back, in shock. your face turns a bright red color as he pulls away.

"tell her, bill!" richie encourages him.

bill shakes his head and chuckles, "i-i like you, y-y/n."

"lucky you, because it just so happens that i like you as well," you smile, the losers loosing their minds at your answer.

he smiles widely and pulls you in for another kiss, butterflies erupting in your stomach. once you two pull away, you lean closer to bill.

"you're a way better kisser than richie," you say quietly, giggles falling shortly after.

"I HEARD THAT!"

this was going to be one hell of a summer.

end.

a/n; CUTE CUTE CUTE!!! sorry for any misspellings,, im too lazy to look through it lmao c:

#it 2019 #it 2017 #it #bill denbrough x you #bill denbrough imagines #bill denbrough imagine #bill denbrough #bill denbrough x reader #jaeden martell x reader #jaeden martell #jaeden lieberher #jaeden wesley #losers club x you #losers club imagines #losers club imagine #losers club x reader #losers club #the losers club

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ak8shi · 4 years ago

Text

Going out/clubbing with the HQ boys series: Miya Atsumu

This man.. I’m going feral

FIRST OF ALL,,, let’s get this straight: he is a total PARTY ANIMAL !!! you can’t tell me differently

Like its just a natural thing for him; he’s hot, he likes to socialize, and well,.., he likes to get fucked up when he isn’t playing volleyball LMAOOO

You probably meet him out at a bar actually; he sees you first, dancing ON TOP of the bar as soon as he walks into the function with his boys

you catch his eye immediately, he knows he’ll regret it if he doesn’t talk to you by the end of the night

Atsumu really said “Girl the way you’re moving, got me in a trance…🥵”

He thinks you’re adorable, like so cute and pretty, and Suna is like dude,,,, just ask her to dance

He’s a pretty confident guy so he probably just goes up to you and taps you on the leg, yelling into your ear when you bend down to meet his level

He’s calling you “babe” and “doll” and somehow it’s not creepy? You’re sold

You, turning around to bask in his beauty: for personal reasons I have decided to pass away <33

I mean you probably also notice him shortly after he walks in; his aura is so,,,strong and confident yet fun!! Never a dull moment with this guy

He’s definitely not a bad dancer, but he’s focused more on spitting game to you rather than trying to impress you with his dance skills LMAO

I can see him wearing a basketball jersey over a sweatshirt thinking he did something LMAO, but like he looks so good still

He definitely would have his ears pierced in college, possibly gauges 👀

Atsumu probably pregames with beer, but then moves to hard liquor once he gets to the bar

BIGGG SAKE BOMB GUY, will not hesitate to buy multiple rounds for his girl and ofc the boys

He’s definitely in a frat, a member of Apple Sigma Pie perhaps, but I also feel like he wouldn’t let that be his only personality trait if you know what I mean

Definitely lives his own life and doesn’t get sucked into Greek life, the RANGE periodt

Like, SO CHARMINGGGG,, he will NOT hesitate to talk you up at this bar

…

SIMP NATION RISE

Also ya’ll can NOT TELL ME this man doesn’t vape, LIKEE,, his go-to flavors are mango and lychee ice

Offers his puff bar to you, his lungs said ⚫️⚫️,

BUT maybe you said 😳 when he hotly blew the vapor into Suna’s face, grinning at his friend’s disgruntled expression before Suna snatches the puff back from him

Anyways long story short, ya’ll get to know each other that night through small conversation like “what’s your major” and “what year are you,” but at the end he asks for your snap,,, you know damn well you give it him lol

Even though his gives off man whore energy, in reality he respects women and is an overall friendly person, so he just happens to get along with a lot of different types of people

the type to have student athlete shit like “The grind never stops 🗣💯💧🇯🇵🏐 Psalms 23:5🙏🏼” written in his insta bio

So ya’ll probably talk for the next week or so, and whenever Atsumu gets a snap from you his toes curl and he gets all warm inside

Osamu, alone and not talking to any girls he’s actually interested in: But imagine how tired we are. Imagine how tired we are..

LMAO so one time Tsumu was stalking your insta and he shows Kita your page, gushing over how amazing you are, and Kita accidentally likes a picture from 245 weeks ago,

ATSUMU ISN’T EVEN FOLLOWING YOU YET AHH

Atsumu: Kita sweetie, you really snapped on me with this one✨🧚🏼‍♀️🌙💕 now do the same to your neck🥰💘😽

Explains the mishap to you, ofc you find it hilarious & flattering

So after talking for the week, he invites you to a small house party that he as well as the volleyball team are hosting the next weekend after

You’re so excited to see him again in person aw

You pull up at the house that the volleyball team rents looking amazing, Atsumu is literally gawking

“Ma’am…a crumb 🤲🏼”

He sticks with you the whole night, an arm around your waist or shoulder, always bending down to your level to hear everything you say clearly

We all know this man is TALL,,, a TREE that we would all like to cl*mb

Sis,,, you just KNOW he smells SO damn good too, like One More Time by Daft Punk is playing in the background b/c Inarizaki are EDM/Techno FIENDS, ya’ll are straight vibing together

(Side note: I can totally see these boys going to festivals, WOOK ROYALTY)

LOVES beer pong and would think it was SOO attractive if you were good, let’s be honest,,, your back hurts from carrying the team😌

After you both have a few drinks in you, he decides to make a move after ya’ll finish your game

Honestly, the type to just put his arms around your waist and ask “Babe, can I kiss ya?” (if you didn’t want to he most definitely would not force you at all ofc he respects you sm)

You’re red, he’s red, all you can manage to get out is “U-Uh sure?”

I need a moment… he’s such a good kisser, his lips are so soft, and he tastes like cherry cola and rum

He then asks if you would go out on a real date with him, and you can not believe that this frat boy is asking you out like this AHA

You: Maybe if you were actually good at beer pong I would consider saying yes 💗

Him: Heart’s ❤️ been broke 💔 so many times⏱, I-I, don’t know🙅🏼‍♂️what to believe 🙏🏼💔

Overall, you would hit it off with him🥺 like I said, he’s the type that never leaves you feeling awkward and never fails to surprise you !! Best boy!

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yourdanganronpaneedshere · 5 years ago

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heya long time no see! remember that time i made a request but the requests were closed?, welp now that they're open again, im here to re-send mine as i promised owo; how would rantaro, kokichi, shuichi, kaito and kiibo react when they see their (S/O) escaping from her execution, and when everything is over, she appears behind them all tired and exhausted saying "did ya' miss me?"

HeY GUYS, sorry for the long absence lmao, but it’s one in the morning and I need some ANGST. Anyways, I’m glad you’re back hun! I was really excited to do this ask!

~ Mod Hiyoko

Amami, Ouma, Saihara, Momota and Kiibo’s Fem! S/O escaping her execution!

Rantaro Amami

There was a dark aura in the trial grounds as everyone’s chatter continued on. Rantaro had a feeling since they first exited the elevator that you were hiding something, and as the trial went on, the sinking feeling in his stomach only got worse.

He didn’t really care so much how or when you committed the murder, he just wanted to know why. He wouldn’t even have imagined his dear S/O committing such an atrocious act.

You began to grow more and more nervous as you felt his stone gaze beat into you… Like he was staring into your soul. Finally, you just admitted it was you.

Rantaro let out a sigh. Definitely not one of relief. More like a weight he had been carrying was now off his shoulders, but in the worst way possible.

It was a particularly messy kill, so people didn’t have too hard of a time believing it was you. The vote was cast swiftly and everyone stared at the screen as your portrait appeared. You were the Blackened.

Your classmates looked at you in a mixture of pity and remorse. They demanded you explain your actions in minute detail, but the only voice you could register was that of your boyfriend’s.

“Why?” Rantaro asked you simply. “Why did you do this?”

“B-because…” It was hard to speak with everyone’s gazes upon you, but you managed to choke out your explanation, and everyone appeared satisfied, aside from a few snide remarks from Miu and Kokichi, but Rantaro shut them up with a harsh glare.

You couldn’t tell if he was disappointed, sad, angry, or a mix of the three, but all you felt in that moment was shame so heavy that you felt like you deserved whatever Monokuma had in store for you.

Rantaro approached you, and you braced yourself for harsh words, but instead he gently wrapped his arms around you in a loving embrace. His hugs were always the best, but this one was tighter than usual, and he was slightly trembling.

“I love you S/O. I’m so, so sorry.”

He tried to grab you again when you were dragged off to face your execution, but there was nothing he could do. He felt empty. The anger and depression wouldn’t sink in until much later, all he could think about was that you were gone. Or else he thought.

“Did ya miss me?”

He stared at you, mouth agape, but he nodded in response. He gently placed his hand on your cheek and caressed it with his thumb before leaning in to kiss you.

“Yeah, I did.”

Kokichi Ouma

For once, Kokichi almost lost his composure. He knew it was you from the very beginning, but a part of him thought maybe, just maybe there was a chance he could be proven wrong.

He kept his arms carelessly rested behind his head, he had the same mischievous grin, and he still toyed with your classmates like it was all a game to him. But inside, he was panicking. He finally found someone he could trust, and she had to go and kill someone. He felt betrayed, but the common sense in him told him not to jump to any conclusions just yet.

To your surprise, Kokichi barely acknowledged you at all throughout the entire trial. But then again, you knew him long enough to know that he probably had connected all of the dots long beforehand. Was he pissed off? Did he not care? There was no way for you to know.

Everyone else came to the same conclusion he had, and trial ended with you being voted as the Blackened. Since you were dating Kokichi, everyone had assumed that you were as nasty as him by default, so no one was really surprised.

“Why did you do it?” It wasn’t Kokichi who had asked this, but Shuichi. Your boyfriend was still actively ignoring you.

“I…” You explained to the best of your abilities. Your motivations came to a bit of a shock to the others. They expected something more… Sadistic.

You knew every second drew you closer to death, and you wanted to break the silence between Kokichi and yourself before you left him for good. You spoke his name, but he cut you off before you could say anything else.

“Wait!” He turned towards Monokuma with a desperate look on his face that surprised even you.

“Execute me instead! You want someone to die, right? Kill me in her place!”

You stood there blankly, unable to process what was going on. Kokichi, who had been ignoring you for the whole trial, who hadn’t even reacted to your confession, was now pleading for your life.

Monokuma just laughed at him. The black and white bear pulled a lever and the chain gripped your neck in a tight hold and yanked you backwards.

Kokichi screamed out your name as you disappeared. Shortly after, you reappeared on the large screen, and everyone watched as you withstood indescribable torture. Kokichi couldn’t even watch the end. He turned away, a dark shadow covering his expression. You were gone. The only person who had ever truly loved him. The Mastermind would be put through hell. He would see to it personally.

There was a tap on his shoulder, and he whipped around to see your triumphant smirk.

“Miss me?”

“W-what?”

Not much time was spent before he tackled you in a hug. His heart pounded in his chest, and he fought to hold back tears. His stance on the Mastermind still stood. They would pay in their blood for what happened to you, but that would have to wait awhile. Kokichi didn’t plan on letting you go any time soon.

Shuichi Saihara

Shuichi couldn’t believe it. It was Kaede all over again, but this time worse. At that point, he was convinced God wanted to see him suffer.

It hurt him immensely to do so, but as the Ultimate Detective, it was his job to root out the truth and save his fellow classmates from impending doom… Even at the cost of his lover’s life.

The entire time he followed the trail towards you, he felt the lump in his throat getting ever bigger. He knew without a doubt you were the killer, but he couldn’t bring himself to flat out say it. You both made direct eye contact, and though your lips were in a straight line, and your eyebrows rested comfortably like you could care less about the world, your eyes spoke to him in a way that said “it’s okay. You can say it.”

And so he did.

“…and my deductions have lead me to believe that… S/O is the killer.”

Everyone gasped. Partly at the fact that he thought you were the killer, but also because he could accuse his girlfriend of murder so calmly. It was a whirlwind of emotions in the trial room, but no one’s shock could outmatch the pure despair you and Shuichi felt in that moment.

Before he voted, Shuichi insisted you explain your actions, and internally begged that you at least killed them on accident, and not in an act of cold blood.

After you had explained everything with tears in your eyes threatening to spill over, everyone cast their vote, and all that was left to do was wait.

Shuichi didn’t waste anymore time on talking, tears fell from his eyes like a waterfall and he solemnly walked up to you and pulled you into his arms. He didn’t even care why you did it. He was about to lose the most important person in his life, and it was going to be shown on a huge t.v. like it was some sort of joke.

“I’m so sorry Shuichi.” You felt like you had to say something, something to calm his nerves, and to atone for the emotional strain he was put through, but he just shook his head and squeezed you tighter.

“No, I’m sorry. I should’ve prevented this from happening, I should’ve-”

“Let’s give it everything we’ve got! IIIIIIIIIT’S, PUNISHMENT TIME!”

In the blink of an eye, you were ripped from Shuichi’s grasp and pulled onto the execution grounds. It happened so fast Shuichi couldn’t even react. He just watched in silent agony as you went through your death. It was torture. There was no way he would be able to bounce back from this. But… maybe God didn’t hate him as much as he thought.

“Ya miss me?”

Of course he would ask a million questions once you got out of there, but at that moment all Shuichi did was hold you while the sobbing started up again.

Kaito Momota

Kaito was yelling throughout the entire trial. It wasn’t unusual for him to be vocal during trials, but this time there was unadulterated anger and frustration lacing his words as everyone began to accuse you of the murder.

“W-What the hell are you guys saying?! S/O would never kill anyone! Shuichi-”

But even his sidekick wasn’t there with him this time. Kaito desperately looked over at you, inwardly begging you to show any sign of innocence, but the look of guilt in your eyes said it all.

Even after everyone had voted and you were revealed to be the Blackened, he was still in denial. He tried to run at Monokuma, yelling various insults and curse words while Shuichi and Kiibo both held him back.

Nobody would ever catch him cry, but the sadness in his eyes was enough.

“S/O, why?”

You explained everything, expecting Kaito to be furious with you. He was furious, all right, but not with you; with the Mastermind.

He panicked when Monokuma announced that it was time for your punishment, and ran over to you, wrapping you in a protective embrace. But the chain grasped your torso, and even Kaito’s strong hold wasn’t enough to keep you from being yanked backwards.

He watched your execution, gritting his teeth the entire time.

“DAMN IT!” He yelled, pounding his fist on a nearby surface. It wasn’t fair. You shouldn’t have been forced to kill. He was going to stop this killing game. For you, and for-

His thoughts were interrupted by a voice coming from behind him.

“Did ya miss me?”Surprisingly, his shock didn’t last long before he pulled you into a hug. Like I said, nobody would ever see him cry… But at that moment, he was pretty damn close.

K1-B0

Kiibo couldn’t understand it. He couldn’t wrap his head around how you could get yourself in this position. Whether you killed on purpose or by accident, he was just… dumbfounded.

The entire trial he was silent. Normally he would chime in, as eager to solve the murder and get back to his life as everyone else. But now he could only watch in depressed silence as the trial continued on. You had told him beforehand exactly what happened, and though Kiibo did have his own sense of justice… he still couldn’t send his lover to her death.

But once the trial came to a close and your face appeared on the large t.v. signifying your guilt, his silence came to an end. There was a flood of emotions he didn’t even know he could feel. Sadness at your impending death, fear at what said death would hold in store for you, and anger that you were forced into this situation in the first place.

Everyone asked why you did what you did, Kiibo included, and you answered honestly. Monokuma’s shrill and ugly voice rang out, saying it was time for your punishment. You ran to Kiibo to share one last hug, and kissed him gently on his cheek, apologizing for leaving him. Kiibo assured you he held no hard feelings, and himself apologized for letting it come to this.

He broke down in tears when the chain yanked you backwards into the black abyss; into the trial grounds fit only for the Ultimate (Talent) herself.

You two were always together… How could this happen? You swore to protect each other, and he lost you. Throughout your execution, he was thinking of ways he could destroy the Mastermind and end the killing game. Kiibo couldn’t allow anyone else to die.

He didn’t even notice the amazed gasps coming from his classmates as you stumbled up behind him, at least, not until he heard your voice.

“Did you miss me?”

“S-S/O?”

Kiibo wasted no time in rushing over to you, wrapping his arms around you, which, needless to say, was a little painful, but at the time you didn’t care; you simply hugged him back and cried with him. As emotional as this moment was, you would have a lot of explaining to do later… As well as a very pissed off Monokuma to deal with.

#yourdanganronpaneedshere #yourdanganronpaneeds #mod hiyoko #ndrv3 #rantaro amami #kokichi ouma #shuichi saihara #kaito momota #kiibo #x reader #fem reader #danganronpa imagines #rantaro x reader #kokichi x reader #shuichi x reader #kaito x reader #kiibo x reader

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smolie · 4 years ago

Text

in december i wrote a 2020 year music review for myself that i intended to post here BUT...because i was infamously restricted twice last year, i didn’t bother since you wouldn’t be able to read it anyway because it was not possible to view my blog hjfdhfd

now that my restricted era is (hopefully forever) over i just want to post it here for the sake of completion since i want to do the same thing this year

this is really long so if you actually read it ... idk you are insane in the membrane and i love you... but i genuinely don’t expect anyone to read this hjfdhjf i just like reflecting on the music i have listened to and be able to look back on what i enjoyed in certain stages of my life! okiiii bye 💗

january

mac miller - circles (album) it’s a bit funny that i worried putting my thoughts down about this album and now it turns out to be first on the list, chronologically of course … oh bittersweet irony </3 listening to this album is such a double edged sword, either way i am always hit with a truckload of feelings when i turn to this release.

this album came to me in a time of my life where i was slowly but surely sliding down towards rock bottom again just after i got out of it and thought i was okay. the times i’ve listened to this crying in the bathtub with a glass of wine….girl let’s not lol…. it’s almost strange how much i can relate to the thoughts another person brought to paper. the comfort this album brings me is otherworldly, i feel so understood by mac’s words and it’s my go-to “wallow in self-pity for a bit then come out stronger than before” album. then again, i feel a little sting when any of mac’s songs come on shuffle. a friend of mine said she cannot listen to artists who have passed because it feels too strange and most of the time i agree but this time, it’s so so different. this album would have been mac’s salvation, i can feel it. everything would have been a bit brighter and lighter for him after this, it would have had to be. i feel like i would do him a disservice if i did not listen to this album, so i will cherish this final gift from him as his legacy and my comfort. i miss him incredibly and am all the more thankful he shared his heart with us.

album favs: circles, good news, surf

tiny meat gang - broke bitch (single) MAN I TELL THAT BROKE BITCH IF YOU WANNA GET IN TUNE BETTER CHANGE YOUR WHOLE PITCH LIKE WOAH !!!!!!!!!! did that give you whiplash? hehe funny to say this about a song called broke bitch by a duo called tiny meat gang but this song actually means a lot to me! it came out shortly before their show in berlin and i almost exclusively listened to it on my 7+ hours train ride from one side of the country to the other to see my meat boys. this played out of the fat ass speakers at the venue when they stepped on the stage and i will never forget meeting them :’) also the song fucking slaps obviously

february

loona - [#] (mini album) ah yes, the most controversial loona release to date! i’m not gonna lie and say this sounded anything like i expected it to. but also, i have come to terms with the fact that loona release noise music now and personally i am here for it. why not did not have the endless energy of hi high or otherworldly vibe of butterfly, but it’s a hype song and i am always there for hype. i also have to say the b-sides were not as strong for me as on previous releases but i think i have to come to peace with the fact that loona will never top their debut mini for me. though if i can wish for one thing…… let loona have title tracks with a chorus in 2021? pls? crumbs?

album favs: so what, oh (yes i am)

tame impala - the slow rush (album) *lights cigarette* i’m listening to pretty underground music….i don’t think you’ve heard of this band….they are called tame impala *intro of the less i know the better starts playing* yes i am a basic white bitch and listen to like 3 alternative bands but damn i listen to them religiously. like any other basic bitch on this planet i found out about tame impala through the less i know the better and checked out their music. i wasn’t too much into this album as i was into currents but towards the end of the year, i was in a moody alternative music slump that took me back to this album and i like it a lot more now! most importantly, tame impala fulfills my primitive urge to listen to songs that exceed the 4 minute mark. something clicks in my brain when i see a song that is like 6:34 and chances that it ends up as one of my faves on a album are high. i enjoy tiktok like everyone else but this trend of 2:50 long songs needs to be stopped immediately.

album favs: borderline, lost in yesterday, it might be time, is it true, posthumous forgiveness

honorary mentions: onlyoneof - dOra maar, everglow - dundun

march

nct 127 - neo zone (album) ah, yes. the album that fundamentally changed me as a person <3 i’ve been listening to nct for a while, matter of fact i checked my top tracks 2019 playlist on spotify and cherry bomb was on there lol. i remember trying to get into them in 2018 when they released their regular-irregular album but the endless member & unit concept scared me off, so i only listened to a handful of songs without looking into them march 2020, the fateful month in which they released kick it and screencaps of jaehyun’s sexy ass tiddies in the kick it mv landed on my tumblr or twitter and i HAD to look up who this man is…...remember when i thought jaehyun was my ult for like, 2 weeks? me neither, johnny suh only in this house <3

anyway, i checked out this album and by god, is this pure kpop perfection. last time i listened to a god tier no skip album like this was … maybe the perfect red velvet? hype songs, well crafted ballads, love songs that make me wanna learn the lyrics, genuinely fun and interesting pop songs, this album has it all. somehow, the way this album is crafted greatly reminds me of brown eyed girls’ sound-g, it has the same vibe, concept and mix of genres to me, i’m not entirely sure how to explain. anyway, this album is one of my favorites of all time and even though i’ve obsessively listened to it (lastfm says 1.4k scrobbles as of today, december 7th…) i am still not tired of this. i recommend this to anyone who loves kpop tbh, you will have a good time with this!

other than being just a musically solid album, the emotional ties i have with this are …. isabel stop making albums your emotional support 2021 challenge. i’ve listened to this release all spring lockdown, this basically played at every waking hour for all of march and april. the promotion time of this era and lockdown are deeply intertwined for me and so i am always remembered of all the nct content i consumed during that time which inevitably cheered me up so much. this album really means a lot to me :’)

album favs: kick it, mad dog, love song, boom

honorary mentions: itzy - wannabe,

the weeknd - after hours (album) my dear melchanoly, was one of my favorite releases of 2018, so i had been desperate for a new release by abel and boy did he not disappoint. the perfect thotty, dirty emo 80s, making it clap while crying in the club album! this is a no skip from top to bottom and all i can say is that the grammys can go to hell <3 abel aoty! there is really not much i can say about this album, the flawless production, lyrics and sound speak for themself. my only criticism is that i feel overwhelmed by 14 songs, especially when some of them are really long. a few songs greatly overshadow the weaker tracks on the album for me but i still love this to death.

album favs: escape from LA, blinding lights, after hours, faith

dua lipa - future nostalgia (album) after the weeknd’s masterpiece of an 80s inspired pop album i was really looking forward to this. i greatly enjoyed the pre-releases, i played don’t start now and physical up and down, they are still some of my favorite songs released this year! when i first listened to the album i really liked it, songs like boys will be boys or pretty please sound like fillers to be but the rest is solid. yet a month after release you couldn’t catch me listening to this and i cannot even really tell you why. i think it was a combination of the following: 1) i greatly overplayed dsn and physical to the point where i didn’t want more of the pop 80s sound that the album has 2) there were other releases at the time that caught my attention and interest more like neo zone or after hours 3) dua herself….girl….she really gave it her all this year to make herself as unlikeable as possible. nationalist propaganda and the constant traveling during a fucking pandemic were really the kicker. i can barely stand seeing her on my instagram feed anymore, much less listen to her album. her having the nerve to go “we’re in a pandemic lol” when people asked about an animated music video …. if you don’t shut the hell up lmao … also, she takes the crown for the corniest album opener of all time. i nearly closed spotify when i heard future nostalgia (the song) lmao

album favs: don’t start now, physical, levitating, hallucinate

honorary mentions: megan thee stallion - savage

april

apink - dumhdurum (song)

listen, i’m not gonna sit here and pretend like this mini album interested me in the slightest but god, the title is such a banger.i’m so sick, eung eung and dumhdurum are a holy trilogy that i will defend until the end of time! i really hope apink stick to this mature, elegant concept, it suits them so well and goes well with their new sound. come back soon queens <3

rina sawayama - xs (song) i feel like i’m gonna catch some hands here … xs is an absolute banger, the guitar riffs and disruptive sounds really get me going every damn time! but the rest of the album … tell me why it doesn’t catch me?! i literally cannot explain. i need to take an hour, sit down and do nothing but listen to the album from top to bottom once again and see if my thoughts change but right now i only care about xs.

chungha - stay tonight (song) drama! vocals! dance break! choreography! this release served it all. i listened to this obsessively during the time of the release and it still holds up today. can we talk about the run chungha had with gotta go > snapping > stay tonight? lord have mercy.

honorary mentions: april - lalalilala, nct dream - ridin’

may

lady gaga - chromatica (album) the immense disappointment i have in this album is tough to put into words lol. any other artist might have gotten away with this release but gaga having the discography that she has, well … she doesn’t get away with it. this has underwhelming all over it. i enjoyed the pre-releases and my hope was high but the rest just doesn’t live up what i expected, i can’t even say why. it’s just underwhelming pop for someone of gaga’s calibre. i listened to this album during release week and then never again till december to write this list and i can see why.

album favs: rain on me, sour candy ft. blackpink, stupid love

baekhyun - delight (mini album) it’s confession time … this is a name i never would have expected on any of my music lists to end up. exo has always been one of those boy groups i casually listened to. i greatly enjoy their title tracks and a handful of side tracks, i have a few members that i keep an eye on more than others but that’s about it. baekhyun was never one of those members i had any interest in, matter of fact i always thought he was kinda vanilla and boring 😭 i didn’t even plan on listening to this release if it wasn’t for his association with superm and thus nct, so i gave it a shot and we have no choice but to stan. his voice is like butter and can cut sharp at the same time, his versatility is insane. i dived a bit more into baekhyun related content and he is so likeable, it’s almost ridiculous. this production is absolute god tier, not a single skip on this mini. late spring/early summer i had this weird urge to listen to songs with mellow voices but still a banger instrumental and i wholeheartedly blame this release. matter of fact, this album is so good, i had to buy a physical copy. Y’ALL. THIS IS A BIG DEAL. i haven’t bought a kpop album of anyone that’s not holy top 3 (brown eyed girls, loona, nct) in like … idk, 5 years?! baekhyun’s impact. i’m a fan now <3

album favs: candy, r u ridin’?, love again

ak aussenkontrolle - in meinem benz (song) this … is very unrelated to this entirely list but i had to put it on here. i miss my ex boss and our 3 hour drives to meetings in the south of the country where we would blast trashy german rap music </3

nct 127 - neo zone: the final round (repackage) *airhorns* REEEPACKAGE TIIIIIME!!! my first nct era that i experienced from start to finish! i remember watching nct 127’s beyond live with luna where these mfs performed punch and we finished the concert having no idea what this song sounded like. the structure is so unusual and the intro catches me off-guard every time just to hype me up beyond compare. not gonna lie, the fact that johnny has exactly one (1) line hurts but! it’s my favorite line of the entire song! possibly related to the fact that it’s his line but let’s ignore that ….

album favs: punch, make your day

kim woo seok - red moon (song) i’m not even gonna lie to you. i have not a single idea who this man is. you could put him right in front of me and i wouldn’t know … all i know is that he has a banger song. i saw him perform this on a music show that i watched for nct and i ended up loving the song … thanks for your service sir, whoever you are ...

june

stray kids - go live (album) 2020 was kind of the year of boy groups for me, i’m so sorry … stray kids promoted simultaneously with nct 127 so i ended up hearing their title track and holy hell, is that a song. god’s menu is hype from start to finish. it reminds me of good ol’ 2nd gen noise boy group song a lá b*g b*ng fantastic baby. just pure hype and fun noise. i am forever grateful to witness the birth of the line cooking like a chef, i’m a five star michelin. the title track impressed me so much that i ended up checking out the entire album which i rarely ever do with boy groups and what is even rarer is that i enjoyed the b sides lmao!!! it’s not an album that i would put on and just enjoy from start to finish but it has some really solid tracks! this release made me want to keep an eye on stray kids, they seem like a really fun bunch.

album favs: god’s menu, TA, airplane

seventeen - left & right (song) the boy group run continues … same thing with stray kids, seventeen promoted during punch era so i heard their song while watching some music station show for nct and i heard this and was sold. solid, fun pop with the catchiest pre-chorus in history and a banger chorus. i listened to the entire mini and can’t say it really caught my interest so this is a title track only release for me.

dishonorary mentions: twice - more & more (i hate this song so much lol)

honorary mentions: ryu sejeong - tiger eyes, monsta x - fantasia, chloe x halle - do it

july

irene & seulgi - monster (mini) this is a weird release because it’s good. the title track is fun enough, the b sides are dope. but my issue with this is that it’s nothing new. this sounds exactly like a red velvet release. i get that they didn’t want to a joy, seulgi, irene, yeri release only and went for the sub-unit route instead, but why not be experimental and stray away from the usual sound of the group? also, whoever made monster and not naughty the title track deserves to be spat on. at least the choreography here is more interesting and “experimental” for kpop standards. also, why only a seulgi solo and no irene? i have no idea how reveluvs reacted to this release but this has rushed written all over it.

album favs: monster, naughty (i’m counting this to the mini idc), uncover

exo-sc - 1 billion views (mini) doing my part as a filthy casual exo listener. this release goes in the same category as baekhyun’s delight where i like the album so much that i HAD to get a physical copy. i don’t know what they put in the title track for it to be so diddly darn addictive but it clearly worked. the only bad thing about this release is how criminally mismanaged it was by sm, when i get you lee sooman ...

album favs: 1 billion views, on me, say it

baekhyun - garden in the air (song) i told you i’m a loyal baekhyun fan now <3 king releases and i listen, that’s just how it goes now! this is a cover of a boa song and i really love his version. there is not much to say except that it’s a really smooth song and his voice absolutely carries the track. i enjoyed this much more than i thought i would!

hyoyeon - dessert (song) YOU KNOW WHAT I DESERVE??? DESSERT!!!!!!! *insert tik tok challenge here* imagine if miryo featured on this instead of the ethnic hip girl … why can’t we have nice things. anyway, a banger!

johnny - sunny side up episode 1 set (spotify playlist, actual set) johnny being the skilled, talented, multi-faceted king that he is has been dj-ing since before debut (not me acting like i was around at that time lmao) and thus he decided to bless our quarantined, lockdowned asses with an online dj set! that was the most turned up sunday morning i ever had in my entire life. this set kicked off an edm/house/techno affinity that i had for the following couple of weeks. this set is an absolute banger, i would go insane to this in the club. he has an amazing ear for transitions and drops and i still just put on this set on the regular when i have cleaning to do or so. he could fill the void that rona and thus no clubbing in 2020 left in my heart and i’m so happy he decided to share this with us <3 now … john … sunny side up episode 2 pspspspspsps

honorary mentions: gfriend - apple, jessi - nunu nana

august

cardi b ft. megan thee stallion - wap (song) late summer 2021. we are vaccinated, icu beds are free, barely any new cases, clubs are open, this song plays and i can finally make it fucking clap.

troye sivan - in a dream (mini album) a cute mini album! nothing life-changing or as exciting as previous releases but easy (haha!) to enjoy. i really, really enjoy easy, can always count on troye for a dreamy sound.

album favs: easy

honorary mentions: itzy - not shy

september

wonho - love synonym pt. 1: right for me (mini album) honestly? i know like, 3 monsta x songs. i never bothered to get into them and maybe i never will, but it was difficult to ignore the whole wonho & monsta x mess that went on. i have absolutely no memory of why i decided to check out this release, i guess i was curious what he was going to do and … i was positively surprised lol. open mind is the exact time of song i had been so desperate all summer (remember mellow vocals with banger instrumentals? yeah) and uhm … can’t ignore the obvious … mr wonho is fucking fine. sir, you just gained a fan … now, where is love synonym part 2?? huh?????

album favs: open mind, i just, losing you

joji - nectar (album) this one is on tiktok. i heard gimme love in a bunch of tiktoks and had to look up the song and here we are. what an album! it came right as seasonal depression started to hit and accompanied me for a good chunk of autumn. at this point one has to ask if joji can ever really miss? the entire album is a no skip, it’s almost difficult to narrow down my favorites if my favorites weren’t so damn god tier!!!

album favs: gimme love, ew, tick tock, pretty boy, your man

super m - tiger inside / 100 / drip (songs) okay, listen. technically tiger inside & 100 were already released in august. instead of those three songs i was gonna write about the entire album until i realized i really don’t give a fuck about it 😭 i really only care about those three songs. and YES, i unironically like 100. is it a good song? no. but neither is jopping and that fucking bangs. i don’t turn to superm for life-changing, profound music, i turn to them for a good time LOL and that’s what they deliver every time! that being said, taeyong’s VROOM VROOM, UHMM UHMM, GRRRAHHHH verse is life-changing and profound! speak your truth king! also i wish drip was a b side for nct 127 that song is so damn sexy

taemin - never gonna dance again act 1 (album) this isn’t kpop, this is taemin pop. taemin never misses and the fact that hw*s* won dance performance over taemin is a literal hate crime. i will never forget the industry for this daylight robbery … anyway, nice album!!!!

album favs: criminal, black rose, waiting for

stray kids - in life (repackage) *airhorns* REPACKAGE TIIIIME 2.0!!!! i was on the edge of my seat waiting what stray kids were going to deliver after i greatly enjoyed god’s menu. i was still not over listening god’s menu when the repackage came out so i didn’t listen to it right away and now i greatly regret the few days i could have listened to back door earlier </3

album favs: back door, any

jackson wang - pretty please (song) i’m not gonna pretend like i ever listened to a song by jackson ever before. he is short king from got7 in my head and that’s all! i don’t even remember why i listened to this song but all i know is that it slaps severely. i love the wong kar wai inspired music video and the choreography is fun too! i’m gonna check out more of his music <3

honorary mentions: fromis9 - feel good, knk - ride

october

blackpink - the album (album, duh) i don’t even know what to say about this … this might be the weirdest release on the list for me. there are song i absolutely fucking hate (ice cream …) and songs i get my life to (pretty savage) on here and the discrepancy just gives me massive whiplash. i would never put this album on and listen to the whole body of work, i just cannot with the brain damage it gives me. i am still stuck in 2016, begging for bp to release music like whistle/boombayah/stay/playing with fire but i think i need to give up on that wishful thinking … i am just grateful we a got a title track with actual lyrics in the chrous for once.

album favs: pretty savage, lovesick girls

nct - nct 2020 resonance pt. 1 (album) this era was … a ride. nct 2020 happening was near inevitable but with covid it got pushed back so far, i started to believe it wasn’t even going to happen. i was semi-terrified of what was going to happen during a comeback with 21 (now 23!!) member group since i only experienced nct 127 comebacks so far and uhh … a LOT happened lmfao but let’s keep this about the album … i had no idea what was going to hit me. johnny having effectively 3 lines in nct 2018 did not give me much hope and after he got denoted to no line treatment in punch again, i was ready to not even have any expectation but this release changed everything. make no mistake that most of my favorite songs are units with johnny, we knew that was gonna happen lmaooo they dropped the teaser video for misfit and i thought i had my favorite song in the bag and then faded in my last song happened. y’all. JOHNNY SINGS? LIKE? ACTUALLY SINGS? DOESN’T GET FORCED TO RAP OR TALK-SING? MY MAN’S VOCALS??? OH MY GAAAAHD! this song is dramatic, theatrical, emo, it serves vocals and rap, it has catchy english and korean lyrics, this is THE song, the ULTIMATE song. i love this song so much, i want to belt it on top of my lungs in the pouring rain. apart from fimls, i also loveeee misfit, that was to be expected after i was going completely insane over the track video. johnny has like 3 lines but again they are iconic (WARNIN’! NCT WE MOBBIN’!) and i just enjoy the track too much to be upset over that. nectar. holy fuck. nectar!!!! wayv never disappoints with their thotty songs, they now have an absolute god tier hoe-ly song trinity with love talk > bad alive > nectar. the first chorus and hendery’s first verse (CHOP CHOP CHOP!) get me every time, this song is so insanely good i am severely upset i cannot sing along to it :( music, dance has nct 127 written all over it in bold letters, it’s so inherently 127’s sound!!!! i love this song so much, it’s so fun, upset and has massive dance-ability, i wish we had gotten a stage for it but i guess you can’t have everything in life </3 make a wish……………………………..the cursed unit. i don’t want to say anything about this except that, unfortunately, the song is fun and i enjoy it. the end. overall, this album is so insanely solid. i know i talk about my favorites A LOT but i genuinely do not dislike a single song on here, this is an absolute no skip album! that’s it. see you for resonance part 2!!!!!

album favs: FADED IN MY LAST SONG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, misfit, nectar, music dance, make a wish

loona - 12:00 (mini album) controversial loona release 2.0! i don’t know what it is, but somehow they managed to lace the words di da dam di dam di dam dam dam dam di dam (yeah) with pure crack. i fucking love why not, i would even go as far to say it’s my 2nd favorite title track. that is right, i think it’s better than butterfly (btw: hi high > why not > butterfly > so what). so much was strange this comeback, from the inexplicable concept + teasers, the outfits, the styling (yves….i mourn your hot girl era) but the title track is just SO good, SO fun, SO catchy that i am willing to ignore it all. i also enjoy the b sides much more than on #, they are much more memorable to me. and now … HASEUL RETURN…………….i purely live to see the next loona comeback at this point

album favs: why not, voice, universe

twice - i can’t stop me (song) thank fuck twice released a good song this year. if more & more had been the only 2020 release, that would have been the real tragedy. not gonna lie, i still haven’t listened to the full album, it just keeps slipping my mind. but! i’m going to! until then i’m gonna bop to i can’t stop me.

ariana grande - positions (album) the way this album has people upset is so funny. i am a huge dangerous woman fan myself, it’s my fave ariana album to date but she has said repeatedly that this is not the sound she is striving for. now she has her coin and can do whatever she wants in music and if that is r’n’b then fuck! we have to live with it! lmao! i can live with the sex theme of the album because it’s delivered in a fun way? but it’s getting a bit old...if the next album is about riding dick only too idk how much i would enjoy that. i would probably always come back to ari because i like her voice so much but girl, there are other topics to sing about, i promise! anyway! i like this album, it’s one of those where i can hit shuffle and enjoy it in the background while doing other stuff.

album favs: positions, 34 + 35, love language, my hair, pov

tiny meat gang - sofia (song) ayyy, it’s my meat boys :’) ending the year the same way they started it, with a banger! i absolutely love the guitar instrumental, the melancholic love song type sound paired with the theme of singing about loving a robot … yup, that’s creativity and talent right here! this makes me so freaking desperate for a new ep and i genuinely have no idea how far or close we are to one but!!! i am always waiting!!!

noel - push (ep) this is something i absolutely did not expect. noel (of tiny meat gang!) released his first ep ever and i was absolutely wowed. noel has it all, the voice, the talent, the creativity and all it took him was the confidence to finally put something out and i’m so happy he did. he gets real personal on bus back, more than ever before and i always get a bit emo listening to this track </3 this man is gonna go places and i’m so happy to witness his journey.

album favs: crow, head sunk, bus back

honorary mentions: sam smith - diamonds

november

taemin - never gonna dance again act 2 (album) i’m gonna say it. idea is better than criminal. the chorus drop???? when he goes MY AH AH MY AH AH MY AH MY IDEA MY MY IDEAAAAAA A-A-A A-A-A???? bitch … tell me you can sit still, i won’t believe you. i like part 2’s title track more, but part 1’s b sides are more interesting to me. either way, taemin delivered as expected!!

album favs: idea, impressionable, exclusive

nct - nct 2020 resonance pt. 2 (album) part two, baby! we made it! part 2 had more mellow, ballad-y songs with my everything, i.o.u. and all about you, overall less drama than part 1 but i still enjoyed it. work it is one of those controversial songs where you despise it with your entire being or you defend this top tier noise till the end and i am absolutely the latter. the agony of not being able to listen to it and seeing the timeline so divided nearly killed me, but i have concluded that people who hate work it have never felt joy in their life <3 honestly my opinion cannot be counted because i eat up anything johnny participates in … biased ass… what i’m not gonna talk about is resonance (the song), this absolute mess of a “remix”. the audacity sm had to release this as a single is insane. anyway!! this era was a rollercoaster ride. all the interactions truly made me interested in members of other units more. hendery (the rise and fall …), yangyang my beautiful son, jeno aka blue hair guy, chenle the chaos kid and xiaojun after he made make a wish his bitch in particular! all the interactions between the units were so fun to witness and it was fun while it lasted but i am … so glad it’s over lol. i miss nct 127, i miss some peace, i hope the boys get to rest for a bit and so does my bank account.

album favs: work it, 90s love, i.o.u., raise the roof

miley cyrus - plastic hearts (album) not in a thousand years would i have expected a miley release to be on here. this girl does everything to be absolutely unlikeable in my eyes but after severely banging out to her heart of glass cover, i was really excited for this and it did not disappoint. what is disappointing is that it took her so long to find a sound that fits her like a glove. i believe many people miss out on this release after her previous history and i nearly would have done the same. this alt/rock influenced pop does her voice so many favors and i really hope she sticks to this direction, i love this album greatly!!

album favs: heart of glass, midnight sky, night crawling ft. billy joel, wtf do i know

kai - kai (mini album) just. imagine debuting with an album like that. lol. what a god tier big dick move. we all knew whatever this release was gonna be, above all it was going to be sexy and boy were we RIGHT!!!! mmmh is exactly as thotty as i needed it to be and the b sides give me everything from r’n’b to trap. i love this release and i love that it’s only the beginning of kai! like!! he is only gonna gain even more experience and become even more powerful!! what the fuck!!!!!

album favs: mmmh, ride or die, hello stranger, nothing on me

honorary mentions. gfriend - mago

december

nothing? wtf?? 😭 no interesting release happened,,,,half the time i listened to christmas songs anyway lol

pre 2020 releases i only found this year

mgmt - little dark age (album, 2018) & oracular spectactular (album, 2007) another tiktok serve. i found little dark age through a tiktok trend and ended up really liking mgmt. they fit perfectly into my autumn/winter moody alt/rock mood that i had going on and i’m happy they have so much more music that i can check out!

artist favs: little dark age, electric feel, time to pretend

tame impala - currents (album, 2015) everyone’s favorite basic alt bitch album! i enjoyed this more than the slow rush for a good chunk of time, it also fit right into my alt rock autumn mood. i really love this album, like previously mentioned it has my favorite long ass tracks on there but also a good amount of short or medium long tracks. i’m still busy enjoying currents and the slow rush but i can’t wait till i finally take the leap to dive into their other releases because i’m loving everything i’ve heard so far.

album favs: the less i know the better, let it happen, new person same old mistakes

joji - ballads 1 (2018) after liking nectar so much, checking joji out was a given and i just love this album. only when i listened to this i realized i heard slowly dancing in the dark a few times on tiktok lmao that cursed app man … i would say i love nectar a bit more but this is still a fantastic album!!

album favs: slowly dancing in the dark, attention, test drive, yeah right

jus2 - focus (mini album, 2019) in my “mellow moody bangers” phase i was scouring playlists for more songs and i think i found focus on me first which fitted right into the niche i was looking to fill and i ended up enjoy this whole release! only later i realized this is a sub-unit from got7 lmao how come i enjoy solo or unit releases by got7 members but their group discography never interested me? anyway, very sexy ep!

album favs: drunk on you, focus on me, love talk

knk - sunset (song, 2019) part of my mellow bangers playlist. very sexy, i can imagine this as a runway song! i have no idea who knk are but given the fact i enjoyed two of their songs so far maybe i should look into them lol

baekhyun - city lights (mini album, 2019) i am repenting for my sins of missing out on baekhyun releases by consuming his music at an exorbitant rate. un village is one hell of a title track that i didn’t appreciate before, but i feel like in 2020 my music interests started to vary and i love the groovy r’n’b and string sound of this song so much. i also love stay up to death, the vocals baekhyun serves here are unreal. his BABY WE CAN STAY UP!!!!!!! gets me every single time!!!! what a mini!

album favs: un village, stay up

mac miller - swimming (album, 2018) i’ve listened to this album before 2020 but i had the urge to put this on here. this is going to sound so corny, but if i had to pick one song to be my life’s title track, it would be ladders. the hope this song gives me is unreal, it feels like a light at the end of the tunnel. this album is so fantastic, i love the upbeat instrumentals paired with sometimes gloomy lyrics are so incredible, mac was truly one of the greatest artists of our time. this album is so outstanding and i miss him every day.

album favs: ladders, jet fuel, 2009, self care, perfecto

doja cat - hot pink (album, 2019) i can never decide if i like doja or not but the album slaps lol that’s it come on tiktok queen

album favs: say so, juicy, like that, streets

my fav 2020 playlists

slapping mellow

neo culture technology

malcolm

why go to therapy when this playlist exists?

top songs 2020

(by spotify)

#again a heads up: this was written in december 2020 and there are a few names mentioned here that....i want nothing to do with anymore lol #like h*ndery of gfr*end #but i'm not gonna delete them because at the time i enjoyed their releases and no one knew they were ignorant asswipes <3 #also not me thinking i'm gonna get vaccinated this summer LMFAOOOOOOO #i can consider myself lucky if i even get them this year #german government my detested <3 #about me

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greatrunner · 4 years ago

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Happened across an old K-Drama I was apparently watching in ye olden times 2013 on Netflix, and honestly, I think I realized why I stopped watching it (lmao).

The focus of the show about of a woman (who works for a home shopping network) who has more or less has a nervous breakdown when her boyfriend (with some big corporate job, of course) breaks up with her and does in a public place (he disappears from the show afterward like a dropped plot thread). Afterward she runs into an old lady-friend (who’s a famous fashion designer) of her who takes pride in seducing other people’s boyfriends into a sexual relationship and complaining about being called a “b-i-t-c-h” and losing friends afterward (that’s her pictured below. She’s cute.)

All of this is to set up the return of a young man (who has become jack-of-all-trades famous producer guy) who home-shopping-network lady used to take care of when she was a teenager, trying to establish a romantic rapport between himself and the woman who isn’t interested in dating men in their 20s (she’s in her 30s).

But, because she doesn’t know what the kid looks like as an adult (holy plot convenience), he basically sneaks his way into a romantic relationship with her anyway and tells her she's being unreasonable when she breaks things off with him for lying. This is after sneaking around the house his mother bought for her, and taking things she needs for work just to get a rise out of her. He ends up living with her eventually, and repeatedly tells her, “sooner-or-later” they’ll end up together.

The show is fifteen episodes long, and is really watching a bunch of guys tell women how they should feel fortunate that men are bothering to look in their direction since hitting their 30s and 40s. I think some of the worst bits about the ageism thrown around in the show is that, when one of the women become pregnant, and everyone finds out she doesn’t have a husband, her boss tells her she has to quit her job. Meanwhile the guy who got her pregnant talks down to her and tells her how to handle her pregnancy. The two end up playing house, mostly to save her job. It was a bit baffling, but it’s not like this doesn’t happen in the states.

The other half is watching two women publicly humiliate themselves over one man (home-shopping-network lady’s boss) who is comfortable with using one them to make the other jealous. All of this is wrapped in a lot of wordy metaphorical talk about “why love is impossible” or “why love makes us crazy”.

Every time I wonder if it can’t get any worse, something worse happens. It’s like watching the domino effect of a bad car accident.

The worst bit was this guy. I like how this dude went from “sweet and supportive” of his girlfriend in all the things she does, to clingy and possessive when she tells him she’s leaving to travel abroad alone (as a way of asserting her independence) shortly after making their relationship public.

He can’t respect that she doesn’t want to travel with him, that she wants to be alone and self-reliant (and doesn’t want a overly-codependent relationship), so he tells her to break up with him. He does the breaking up with her and proceeds to pout like a child whenever she tries to talk to him.

When she tries to tell her bosses that she’s leaving, he yells at her (basically tells her to shut up), drags her out of work, and then buys a bunch of stuff on 12 month payment plan, and in so many words says, “if you’re a good girl, you’ll remember who bought nice things for you” and then she hugs him for it.

She tells her friends about what happened, one of them literally tells her “you better not mess up a good thing!” while the other tells that it’s fine that she wants travel, but also adds this bit about not losing the boyfriend (lest she want to up bitter and alone for “making a mistake”).

#in need of romance 3 #korean dramas #greatrunners meta #long post

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imkindanerdforlanguages · 5 years ago

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aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was actually right about everything about my crush and her maybe girlfriend! Full story below and some will be repeat if anyone’s actually been keeping up with this. Skip to the third to last paragraph if you only wanna hear what happened today and not all the back story. I wrote this mainly so I could look at it later and remember and it turned out wayyyy longer than expected

Ok so I’ve like this girl a long time and we’ve been friends never questioned too much of she liked girls or not so that was never really a problem. So cut to football season 2017. We’re both in marching band and that’s how we became friends that year. We ended up both being in the same English class that school year and I become good friends with some of her other friends, including her maybe gf. (Shout out to those friends they’re super great). Since I have a massive crush on her (it’s 2018 by now) I pay more attention to her and stuff and I kinda notice how she acted with maybe gf. Like paying attention to maybe gf like I payed attention to her, looking at her lips, always mentioning her, stuff like that. So I think “oh she likes her, oh well, I wish her the best.” I’m quite shy irl so I wasn’t gonna make a move or anything and I was content what it was, though hopeful that she’ll maybe like me someday. I hate if people come on too strong myself and kinda believe that feelings are just gonna be what they are, rather than things that can swung heavily (idk if that makes sense but whatever)

So summer break happens then we’re at marching band 2018 still got my crush, still hopeful but not expecting much bc I still notice things between my crush and maybe gf. I think maybe gf is straight (I know, I know I’m not for assuming people’s sexuality but it was what it was) maybe it was my feelings making me think that maybe gf would never reciprocate but anyways I mainly feel bad for my crush bc it looks she really likes this girl and I can relate lol. So homecoming comes and I really wanna slow dance with her but I miss my fucking chance bc I go to the bathroom. Oh well. She did grind on me at one point but all the girls in our group were so whatever it was nice but didn’t really mean anything. And I actually worked up the nerve to text her that she looked gorgeous at homecoming (which she did) and I’m still proud of myself for that

One day shortly after, we’re at a band competition in the warmup room chilling bc we’re waiting for the rain to stop so we can go on. We’re talking in a group and someone ends up asking her if she has a crush on maybe gf, and she quickly denies (and I think yeah right lol) but then they ask if she has a crush on me and she stutters our her denial. The way she did it made me think that maybe I had a chance (there were other things too of course like the occasional look, etc). So the next day I muster up all the courage I have and text her asking if she has a crush on me, she says no, and I confess that I like her to get it off my chest. I thank god that we still remained great friends after that. We actually haven’t brought it up since.

Then the next football game she’s asked if she’s ever kissed a girl and she says yes and I’m like ah ha! I bet they are actually dating. (Side note that I kinda came out to like have the band that night cause someone asked if I was straight and I said no). I get a text from maybe gf the next day asking for relationship advice (she had never mentioned that she was in a relationship before) or something (I can’t really remember anymore). She’s playing the pronoun game so I figure that it’s a girl she’s dating and she’s says so later and tells me she’s bi. I told her I was bi too and we bonded over that and stuff it was nice and brought us closer etc. She says she doesn’t wanna tell me who it is and I respected that but I kinda figured that it was my crush. I think oh well that sucks for me but I’m happy for them. For things like this I largely live by just flowing with life and seeing where it takes you. If I didn’t I’d probably literally explode from stress lmao

Over then next couple months she tells me various things about her relationship which went through ups and downs. She felt trapped and pressured to come out and like nobody else could ever love her (which I always denied). There was a rough patch where she overloaded me with emotional stuff (which I am not prepared to handle) but it’s not too relevant to the story other than that a lot of the things she said made me more sure that my crush was her gf bc it just sounded like how she would act (note that after this she pretty much stopped texting me about her gf so I didn’t really get anymore info)

Sidenote: I’m not too sure how healthy their relationship actually was and since I only ever got one side of it I’m still not too sure how much of what I was told was truthful vs exaggerated since maybe gf was going through a rough patch. There were things like her panicking bc her gf was talking about marriage (yikes) and coming out and stuff. But she also talked about how it was easy to not cheat bc there was no one else in our town and she would kiss other girls as like a shock factor thing at parties and be like “my gf shouldn’t get mad bc it’s not like fr” (also yikes). I’ve pretty much come to the conclusion that both of them had things that weren’t the best but we’re teenagers and this was probably both of their first relationships so I’m not labeling them as bad people or anything. The biggest clue tho that my crush was her gf was that she said that her gf was the only person who knew all the terrible things about her/her life and since my crush was probably the closest to her I sorta assumed

Sidenote 2: some other things that made me sure of their relationship: my crush once got jealous of me in the group chat (she jokingly told me no to something, idk what anymore, and my crush was like what about me??? Lol), maybe gf kinda tripped and my crushes hand went to her waist in an intimate way to stabilize her, they were always each other’s lock screens, my crush would always give in to maybe gf (which sometimes I didn’t like bc I felt like she had to give into some things she shouldn’t have— not like really bad things but just kinda :/ and she’d have to apologize for playful insults even tho maybe gf said like the same level of insult), the eye contact when our teacher mentioned interracial sex lol, also the constant FaceTiming and calling that lowkey got on my nerves (nyc trip was the worst but really wasn’t that bad. It was mostly the jealousy that made it suck)

Sidenote 3: prom happened somewhere in here and we cuddled on the couch a bit but not like what your thinking, more like sat really close but it was nice. At one point she was like completely on top of me bc she was fighting with someone playfully

Anyways moving on to the end of the school year, I’m like 90% sure they’re dating, and I notice things seem tense between them. My crush would put her head down a lot and they would playfully insult each other with a bit more bite. They didn’t hang around each other as much as they used to, etc. I was just really picking up on some vibes. Eventually things seem to settle down a bit buts it’s the end of the year already and they’re graduating and stuff.

All three of us ended up doing this program at a university that lets kids work with scientists and learn about stem etc. we each work in different labs so we don’t see each other everyday but the group gets together like 1-2 times a week. During these, I notice that they just don’t seem as close, like they didn’t sit next to each other, phone lock screens aren’t each other, crush’s name in maybe gfs phone is her full name not nick name (though this could have always been that, I’m not sure), my crush no longer apologizes or cares as much if maybe gf gets a little mad (which she gets easily). Taking this with the tension before school got out into consideration, I figure that they must have broken up. Cool cool, maybe I have a chance but also she’s moving across the state for college in a month so :/

That brings us to the grand finale: today. So I have no idea really if they have broken up or if they were even together in the first place. But then maybe gf mentions that she is now dating this guy (which I approve of, he’s super sweet). I kinda suspected bc a picture of him was her lock screen, they had been hanging out a lot, initials in insta bios (which Ik should be a dead give away but she once said that she hates how people assumed that her and this other guy were together when she was dating her gf do I didn’t wanna assume anything) and I was like ah ha! At lest Ik that they aren’t dating now if they ever did in the first place. She invites me to come hang out with her, her bf and another couple that I’m good friends with tomorrow. So after I get home, partly bc I don’t wanna be the only single person there, partly bc I wanna see if I can weasel out the truth, and partly bc I may have day dreamed about us being all coupley too and maybe a kiss (oh how I wish). I text her and ask if my crush can come too so I’m not the only single person there. She texts back saying that it would be a good idea. So I figure it’s now or never so I ask if it’s bc they dated. She originally says no but then says admits that yes they dated but she broke up with her and they are still friends.

She basically says that she broke up with her bc she’s not ready to be out bc she doesn’t wanna lose some of her friends, wants to be normal, etc. she’s always been insecure, so it’s not too surprising for me. I sincerely hope that one day she reaches a place where she can be herself and not worry. I also feel bad for my crush bc I have a feeling that she’s probably still pretty hurt over it and I wish her the best too. I’m not gonna try to like make a move or anything bc a. I have no idea how long it’s been since the breakup and how she feels about it b. I’ve already expressed feelings so I don’t wanna be that person who keeps pusing after they’re rejected c. She’s moving like 6 hours away in a month

All in all I’m super surprised that I actually picked up on the fact that they were dating and had broken up bc I’m am not very emotionally intelligent at all. Honestly I doubt I would have picked up on much if I was paying such close attention bc of my crush. I spent like an hour+ writing this I can’t believe I actually had so much to say and it makes my life seem much more dramatic that it is. Thank you if you actually read all this or have kept up with my woes in the slightest bye

#i was gonna stufy chinese but i wrote this novel instead #me

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sunnysidewrites · 7 years ago

Text

Best Friends to Lovers!Seokmin

HAHAHA THAT’S RIGHT FOLKS!!!!!! I PULLED THIS SHIZ ON YALL!!!1!11!! this is part 2 of seokmin’s bday present. and yes i know im over a month late leAVE ME ALONE!! THIS IS THE FIRST BULLETPOINT AU OF 2018!!! AND YES ITS AT THE END OF MARCH!!! FORGIVE ME CHILDREN!!!! i had SOOOO much fun writing this but maybe a bit too much bc i think i went overboard,,, but i cant help it that he needs so much love!!!

this is THE. LONGEST. BULLETPOINT. AU. I’VE. EVER. WRITTEN. it has definitely surpassed assassin!cheol pt 2 by a long shot and im a little concerned honestly bc i go OFF whenever i talk about my biases, especially the underrated ones. (wonwoo, you’ll get your turn one day wait for me bby)

happy bday to my sunshine pt 2. i love you so much that words will never be able to express it, even as a writer who writes as a hobby and has to Put Things Into Words. you’ve been such an amazing influence not only on the members, but also on carats and other diverse fans. i’ve always believed the saying that the brightest smiles hold the most pain, and i may not know all of your struggles, but i know how much you have to hide behind this idol front. we love you unconditionally, so please keep shining for us. also allow yourself to be sad and other negative emotions, but there must be darkness in order for the light to be appreciated, right? thank you for being the ball of sunshine we so deeply love. 💕💕💕

warnings: might give you diabetes on how soft and sweet i was feelin!!! as a double bias, it is hard to give everyone equal love so this is the 1 time i could fully dive into it!! also seokmin is a flirty and jealous drink sipper

Part 1: Be There In Spirt

Seokmin was your go-to for anything and everything

Whether it was to find a movie buddy or seeking advice, he was always there

You first met him at some social event your friend dragged you to

“So you can talk to more people!” Your friend would respond when you asked why

You really didn’t care much, if at all, for parties unless someone you’re acquaintanced with was also there

Your friend was too occupied with other people, so you just grabbed some food and juice and settled yourself in the kitchen

Someone entered the door and you could hear the volume of his muffled voice even from the other side of the door before he entered

You were just chilling at the countertop with your back to him and munching on your tortilla chips with salsa that you didn’t care who entered

He noticed that you were the only one there and you were eating and occasionally sighing mood tho

As he was opening his soda, he asked you pointedly, “is the food good, at least?”

You were startled and slightly jumped at the sudden sound of someone’s voice

You turned around to be greeted with the goofiest yet brightest smile

Is it possible to see that bright of a smile or one at all when someone’s drinking? Bc he definitely made it work

You just finished swallowing your food and merely brushed your hands and shrugged, “it’s pretty bland like this party,” which earned a heart laugh from the boy

“You got dragged here, too?” You nodded and cracked a smile. “What, was the whole antisocial ‘take refuge in food’ act a dead giveaway?”

He smiled and lightly chuckled, “that, and how you were muttering about getting dragged here as you munched on your chips,” he gestured to your now empty plate

“Hey, correction — I said that I was brought here against my will”

“Like that’s such a big difference,” he says with a smile on his lips as he finishes up his soda

“And it’s not every day that I meet a cool, tortilla-chip-eating person at a social, but maybe I would let myself get dragged out more often”

You kinda stared back at him and slowly blinked bc like

Was that a hint of flirtation in his tone or were you just that self-centered?

Maybe best of both worlds

You raised an eyebrow at him, “you want to see a loner at the snack table?”

“It’s easier to approach you or anyone like this, isn’t it?” He flashes another one of his infamous pearly grins and reaches in your bowl to steal a chip and pops it in his mouth

You jokingly say, “Oh, you think we’re friends now?”

He laughs throatily and puts his hands up in defense

“I think we’re past the stage of bonding over stale chips and salsa at this point”

And you’re cut off shortly when his rowdy group of friends interrupts the friendly banter y’all had rip :(((

Those darn cockblockers

“I’ll see you around, Tostitos,” he throws in a wink and gives you a short wave as he backs away from the door and leaves you as quickly as he entered

You shake your head and look at the sad, crinkled bag of chips and salsa

“Did he just nickname me after a brand of this stale party food??????”

What an iconic first impression tbh bless

Ever since then he would have this weird nickname system of naming you after foods you would eat to make fun of you or just joke around

“Cheer up, cheese puff!” ok this actually sounds kinda cute and now I’m soft :’(((

“Be there or be square, you pretzel”

You: “that didn’t even make any sense”

“Don’t be salty” ba dum tss

“Can you help me out, (peanut) butter cup?”

“Whatever you say, nerd...s”

“Okay you’re not getting any of my other candy then, seok”

He’s the only one out of your friend group — actually just everyone in general — to yell directly into your ear as a greeting

He calls it “cute”………………….. ok seok

But it’s ok bc he gives out the best hugs

Or maybe it’s just the best to you heheh ;)))

Invented!! Bear!! Hugs!!

The best ones that crush your lungs and you can barely wheeze out a breath

Your ideal hang out session with him involves screaming at the top of your lungs while playing Mario Kart and having a whole junk food feast sprawled out on the coffee table

“bRO YOU MADE ME SWERVE”

“GET OUT YOU’RE IN MY WAY”

Bonus: the chips and candy are also sometimes used to pelt at each other

It’s honestly more of a damn jungle when y’all are together it’s amazing LMAO

The type to crash at your place unannounced whenever he wants

You would open the door and he would just stroll in and look through your fridge like he’s lived there all his life

“WHY are you going through my fridge??? You need to go home, I have things to do today”

“Eh, we can just work alongside together—you’re running low on juice”

“Imma juice you boi if you don’t leAVE”

Your friend group most likely carries a pair of earplugs whenever you’re together

But underneath their rolling of eyes, they lowkey highkey ship the hell outta y’all

They even sometimes drop gigantic hints for you to get together but,,, things don’t exactly go their way

“Hey, Seokmin, my parents are having a barbecue this weekend. Maybe bring a plus one? Like uhhhhhh Y/N?” Real subtle

And he’d be like “what, Y/N??? Why would we need a plus one??? Aren’t we all going together anyways?”

The same thing happens on your end too smh

“My cousin is having a birthday party, you wanna come with? You can bring a date or whatever, probably Seokmin or something”

“Seok??? He would probably burn the place down HAHA but ya I guess I can bring him *shrug*”

And every time, both of you would ask: “but why (that other person)??? I can bring (insert another random member)”

GET A CLUE BABES!!! OH MY LORD

And they would just shake their head like sigh look at these naive kids

Mingyu: so are we just gonna let them be dumb like this orrrr????

Cheol: yeah let’s just leave them alone — nO THEY DON'T SEE HOW PERFECT THEY ARE TOGETHER WE GOTTA DO SOMETHING I’m with u on that one cheols

So this is the O Great Seungcheol’s plan: make each other jealous without knowing y’all would get jealous

A foolproof plan, amiright folks????

And what other cliche perfect way to do that than a WEDDING

it just so happens that Seokmin’s aunt is conveniently getting married and he’s inviting the whole crew

And the guys are like mwHAHAHA THIS IS PERFECT

Everyone’s talking about who’s bringing who as a date and things like that and you’re just chilling and scrolling on your phone

And everyone’s making eyes at each other without you knowing bc they’re like ok y’all time to initiate I Still Get Jealous Plan

“how about you, Y/N? who are you taking?”

And Seokmin subconsciously wants to know too bc he’s tuning in with the rest of them LOL

And you don’t even bother looking up at your screen bc that’s how indifferent you are to this whole thing

“I don’t really care, I guess anyone who doesn’t have a date or something”

Seokmin is about to open his mouth and ask you since that’s your usual thing

BUT SHOCKER!! SOMEONE BEATS HIM TO IT!!

“How about going with me? I don’t have anyone”

And you expected Seokmin to say those words, but you look up and see Jeonghan smile at you

THE LOOK OF B E TR A YA L ON SEOKS FACE DID THE TEMPERATURE JUST DROP BC IT IS C O L D IN HERE

Admittedly, you feel a little odd going with someone who’s your best friend and go-to for everything but hannie is your friend, so you don’t mind too much

So you’re like “o-oh sure that works”

And you steal a glance at seok but he has an unreadable expression and is smiling like usual

And for some reason you feel your chest drop just the slightest bit bc you thought he would at least fight for you a little bit and say something like

“heY HEY Y/N IS MY GO-TO FOR THESE THINGS”

But he doesn’t at all,,, and his lips looked a little strained when he smiled

and jeonghan is looking all slyly at seok bc he knows just a minute ago he could feel the back of his head being burned off by Seokmin’s glare

The convo picks up from where it previously left off and things are back to normal but the atmosphere is a little heavy

The day of the wedding comes and you’re about to finish dressing up

You’re waiting for half of them to pick you and meeting the other half at the venue

And ofc, in this half includes seok and jeonghan yikes

You hear your doorbell ring, and you’re like oh they’re here!! You say bye to your parents and put on your coat and shoes

When you open the door, you find yourself in front of Jeonghan and he’s like holy crAP

He’s awestruck and is looking at you like :OOOOO

“Jeonghan! Uhhh,,,, do I look weird???”

And he snaps out of it and is violently shaking his head like nO NO N O ofc not you look amazing

And you’re like heck yea I do I spent time looking this good :)))) (you don’t actually say this but it’s a thought)

and you get a funny feeling in your stomach and you realize you’re anticipating what Seokmin would think

If you got a good response from your “date,” surely your best friend would say smth good too??? Right??? That’s how this works???

Little did you know Seokmin (and everyone else) witnessed what happened and they’re like oMG Y/N LOOKS GOOD

Seokmin couldn't help but feel it should be him in Jeonghan’s shoes but he couldn’t refute the fact that you did indeed look like a million bucks

As you get in the car you lock eyes with him and you’re like hey Seokmin!!!

But you’re instantly b l o w n away by how CRISP HE LOOKS

His brown hair that’s usually sitting down and hides his forehead is now slicked back but in a way that still stands up and exposes more of his forehead and outlines his masculine face shape

His sharp suit perfectly fits on his toned body and you’re fully convinced you’re looking at an angel

YALL KNOW WHAT LOOK IM TALKING ABOUT. YOU KNOW.

You have to actually hold back a squeak bc you’re shook af

And he’s dying bc of how cute you are and wow are his palms sweaty???

You end up sitting in the middle of him and jeonghan and you’re just sitting happily and waiting to see what kinda food is at the wedding lmAO

but the real meal here is you eh??? Eh??? ;))))

Seokmin seems a little nervous and tense sitting next to you looking that good like he’s actually a little intimidated

You’re waiting for him to speak up and he’s clearing his throat and stammering a little bit

“Y-you look really nice, Y/N”

And you’re like ahahahhahhdgdhhhcjdbdhhd

“Thanks, seok, you clean up really nicely too”

And both of you can’t look each other in the eyes bc you’re gonna actually combust if you do

And everyone in the car is looking at each other like hehehhehehehh it’s workinggggg

When y’all finally arrive at the venue, you get out of the van with the help of Jeonghan’s hand

Seokmin: conceal don’t feel :))) channel your inner Elsa man :))))

And jeonghan is glancing back at Seokmin every so often to test him

And Seokmin is starting to catch on like ,,,, why is hannie always looking at me

He tests him even more when he casually holds your shoulder and drapes his arm around you

And Seokmin is like !!! ELSA WHERE ARE U

Jeonghan is being a little too touchy in seok’s eyes and Seok is silently fuming over the drinks

Soonyoung is like dude I can feel your dark energy all over my soup what’s up with you???

Seok is about to explode at this point and anything can set him off

“isn’t Jeonghan being just a little too touchy-feely with Y/N? That looks like borderline harassment. They’re not even dating!”

And soonyoung is silently laughing bc he’s like oh you fool lmao

“You sound a little too overprotective over your best friend. Well — if that’s really the reason why you are”

“Of course I’m just worried — dID YOU SEE THAT ARE THEY FEEDING EACH OTHER”

Soonyoung: u need help bro

“Steal a dance with her later” soonyoung says and seok is like uh what Im not gonna make a fool out of myself

All soonyoung does is shrug and winks and he goes back to eating

Soon enough the dancing portion begins and jeonghan takes you out to the dance floor

And it’s nice bc you’re just having pure fun and dancing goofy moves, not to mention Jeonghan is great company

But you’re a little disappointed you and seok weren’t able to talk and have fun the way y’all usually do

Jeonghan has sensed this the whole day and he says “I’ll be out of your hair soon enough”

You’re taken aback by his statement and you’re like “what no you were really fun to be around tonight!!”

And he laughs and ruffles your hair like “no need to cover it up. I knew this would provoke him” and you both look across the room where seokmin is standing alone, sipping on his drink as he pretends he wasn’t just looking at you dancing for the past ten minutes

The upbeat song transitions to a slower song and jeonghan pats you on the shoulder

“Here’s lover boy’s cue ;)))” and he bends down to your ear and whispers

“But I could stay here longer and mess around with him a little longer”

You push him away laughing and say “let’s not torture the poor guy any more than you already have”

Both of you are laughing and SURPRISE SEOKMIN APPEARS

and he claps his hand on hannie’s shoulder and says “May I?”

And jeonghan nods and looks between the both of you and is all ;)) have fun kiddos and winks at you right before he leaves

And now there were only 2

You didn’t realize you would be so nervous until your heartbeat nearly spiked up when he came into contact with you

DHHDHDJDJ SORRY IM FREAKING OUT WRITING THIS WOWIEURJ SCREAMS

It’s good I’m good we’re good this is good

His cheeks are tinted pink as he attempts but fails to make eye contact with you once again

He gently takes your hands and places them around his neck and then places his own around your waist

It’s only at this moment that you’re able to make proper eye contact for possibly the first time that entire day

You’re slowly moving to match the slow tempo and you can feel your face getting hotter in the heat of the moment

It stays intimate and silent for a few moments before the both of you try to break the silence

“Umm,,” “So,,,”

Androgen you laugh at how awkward you’re both getting

“This is probably the first time we’re not screaming for the whole area to hear”

He chuckles and nods slowly

“I think my breath is just taken away” he says so softly that the music could have drowned his voice out if it weren’t for the close proximity of you and him

and you’re like ??? By what??? Are you feeling ok??

“By you”

And you’re like bLUUUSSSSHHHing big time

“A-ah, stop it, I only tried to look a little more presentable today,,,,”

Jeonghan somewhere in the distance: that’s not what you told me this morning!!

“You always look beautiful no matter what”

And now you’re at a complete loss of words bc well how do you respond to your best friend who’s shooting compliments one after the other so easily????

You’re desperately trying not to melt into a puddle in his arms but it’s a little hard

“You’re charming as always, Lee” and he’s like ;)) ofc ofc

“You’re a good-looking fellow yourself, not just me. Have you seen the girls who were drooling over you today??”

He blankly blinks at you and shakes his head

“Well, I didn’t notice actually. All of my eyes were on you tonight,,,,,”

FUCUEHEYDH IM SCREWMJRN IM SC REA MIN F

You’re a full fledged tomato by now and you’re trying to bury your face in his chest so that you could save face from this horrid embarrassment

“Okay, tone it down, Seok,,,, I cant handle all of this complimenting for a night”

He laughs and pulls you closer to his chest, his grip on your waist a little more secure

“I don’t know where this is all coming from either, but now that it is, I might as well say it all”

“What was that drink earlier???”

“I swear I’m 100% sober rn ask soonyoung!! Anyways, I didn’t think much of anything when I first met you honestly, but looking back at it, I think there was already some bit of attraction since then”

“You liked me when I was eating chips and salsa??? Really???” You look up at him incredulously

“It may not be the most flattering moment, but it was cute how you were hunched over your bowl LOL”

You: lemme just DIE

“If Jeonghan weren’t your date today, I’m not sure if I would have ever realized this. Maybe at some point, but at a much later time. I think it would have consumed me anyways”

He notices you’ve gone quiet and he’s like oh lord what if I messed up omgofkfkkf

“So,,,, yeah,,, i get it if you don’t feel the same way,,, I don’t wanna make things weird if you’re uncomfortable knowing this,,, but it was made crystal clear tonight that I really like you more than a best friend. I think I always have”

And you’re breaking out into giggles bc you realize how dumb you’ve both been

And he’s like !!!???!!!! why are you laughing omg I’ve done it you think I’ve gone mad

“tbh Seokmin I was disappointed that you weren’t my date since you usually would fight the members if they asked me”

“I kinda thought maybe I’ve been forcing you to do it too much with me?? and the other guys and you can do whatever you want”

“Seokmin, we’re best friends i would have picked you in a heartbeat”

And he’s like skdjjdjh is it suddenly hot in here it’s just you ;)))

“But as for the feelings…… it is weird”

He’s like oh :((,,, yeah I knew it would be kinda weird—

“—that we’ve liked each other all this time and it took us this long to realize it through some dumb wedding date thing”

And his face immediately lights up and you’re about to clutch your heart by how pure he is :’))))

He almost blinds you with his smile and he pulls you in so that your slow dancing position turns into a hug and he’s giggling into your hair and is spinning you around

*INHALES DEEPLY* MY GOD SOMEONE PROTECT THIS PURE BUN IM GONNA CRY I LOVE HIM SM

You can't help but giggle with him since his laugh is so infectious and you’re both a bubbly giggling mess my lord I think I just got diabetes

Poor baby was deathly scared you were gonna reject him but he’s so relieved you didn’t!!! :’))))!!!!!!

He slowly pulls apart from the hug and you’re both looking at each other hesitantly, bashfully

and In The Moment all you’re thinking about is how warm and how right it feels to be in his arms

You’re both still in your hugging position, his arms wrapped around your upper back/shoulders and your arms around his torso

You’re a little out of breath because of all the laughing and spinning, and both his and your eyes flicker to the other’s lips

You’re not sure who leaned in first but the next thing you know, your faces are only centimeters apart, his hand on your cheek

And then you feel something warm and soft on your lips

Holy hELL, am I really kissing Seokmin???!!! You’re silently freaking out and it’s just like

Your brain: ⁉️⁉️‼️‼️⚠️⚠️⚠️

You can feel his smile against your lips as he lightly tugs you closer to him and engulfs you in his embrace

But your mind gets fuzzier with every passing second so you let yourself enjoy the moment

Until you hear distant cheering in the back

“yyyYYYEESSS WE DID IT BOYS FREAKING FI NA L L Y”

You and Seokmin pull away and look back like wtf is happening

Sure enough, the other 12 guys are whooping and cheering and you would have thought it was your own wedding

,,,,refer to husband!seokmin

Seokmin’s just like “wait y’all planned this???”

Jeonghan: ya it was so fun teasing you this past week lmao you’re welcome tho :))))

Seokmin: I’m gonna eat your share of ice cream for the next month :))))

And everyone’s just like “y’all literally took years to realize this you should thank us uhhh”

Seokmin’s about to open his mouth to spout out some more objections but you tiptoe to peck him on the lips to make him shut up

“eeeEW UGHH nvm I already regret doing this”

“Seungcheol I will eat your share of ice cream too”

On the ride back home, you’re both comfortably leaning on each other, your head on his chest and his on top of yours

You’re so worn out that you sleep the whole way back home

Bonus: the guys in the car are giggling softly and take secret pics

Extra bonus: they taunt you both and use it as blackmail but in reality they’re jealous and want you to use it as your phone wallpaper

Extra extra bonus: he gives you a goodnight kiss at the front of your door and the guys scream in disgust and hurry him to return home :’)))))

ICONIC COUPLE OF THE FREAKIFN CENTURY OH NY GODHD!!!!! I LOV!!!!! MY PURE CINNAMON ROLLS!!!!!

#write-svt #seventeen #seventeen seokmin #seventeen dk #seokmin #dk #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen headcanons #seventeen au #seokmin imagines #seokmin scenarios #seokmin headcanons #seokmin au #dk imagines #dk scenarios #dk headcanons #dk au #my post

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westanrv · 7 years ago

Text

boyfriend!dean

dean [ 권혁 ] ; fanxychild + soloist

i think it would be a sweet relationship

you two found each other when hyuk had bumped into you (on purpose) in a cafe

he came off a very intimidating, you’d always just apologized and walked away, but he didn’t let you off that quick

you were quite shy, so when you pulled you back and asked for your number, you were confused

whots this man doin???? was your exact thought

but the truth was, hyuk had seen you here at this cafe a few days before here, sitting, literally doing nothing

and bam, hes in love. lifes so crazy

you gave him your number and went on with your day, not a text or call from the guy.

he didnt even give you his name?? lmao wyd dean

but the next day,, you got a

“yo its hyuk, the guy from the cafe. lets meet, the cafe at 11?”

and thats where the relationship began

and so you two were at the cafe, drinking whatever you ordered

bc we dont drink shame here

and you end up talking about your lives and what you do for a living

and he ends up telling u about what he does and your not surprised bc hes beautiful, ofc he would have an amazing voice too

and then you guys get onto like personal lives

which is super awks btw

and you tell him abt how you’ve been single for a while

and hes like ‘ahh, i just got out of a relationship’ and ur like

‘whot??? what happened??’

and hes like ‘she was a bitch’

and ur like ‘ahhh’

then you guys r dating, like *click* dating

not

but you two start dating shortly after this date, bc you two spend a lot of time together

and i think you two would b really sweet

like just cute

people think you two have a intense relationship

when in reality, its just sweet and happy and cute

you guys nap a lot together, especially together

like he’ll come home from the studio and your already in bed bc, a mood

and he’s like ‘im tired’ and your like ‘me too bro’ and u just end up falling asleep together

and you two would watch a lot of movies together

like korean, chinese, american all of the movies.

any you can get your hands on

you two just spend a lot of time together

despite his job, yknow

smh sort it out

anyway

the dates r really cute,

hyuk spends a lot of time planning out his dates

whereas you just r like ‘what u wanna watch’

and hes like ‘captain america again’

its j supa (junior) cute

he also treats u like a fucking queen (j a side note)

masterlist

requests r open !

#dean #kwon hyuk #khh angst #fanxy child #fanxy child imagines #fanxy child angst #khh #khh imagines #khh scenarios #dean imagines #dean angst #dean fluff #kwon hyuk angst #kwon hyuk imagines #hyuk #kpop

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lusilly · 7 years ago

Text

streets of gotham: secret origins

finally a complete introductory fic for the Streets of Gotham 2 team: Colin Wilkes (Abuse), Ellen Nayar (Ember), Nell Little (Spoiler), Jordan Joyce (Jabberwock), and Niloufar Ghorbani (Seraph). (lucas comes later lmao)

Since Jordan’s got the most complicated backstory, xe has xyr own intro fic you can read here. The SoG2 team is featured heavily in Fiat iusticia and in Wheel in the Sky.

This fic was an exercise in Mark Waid’s advice on how plot is nothing more than setting upon which to hang emotion.........and that was Tough lmao. extremely unsatisfied with the ending. Relies heavily on story from Batman: The Black Mirror. Damian is about 16 here. My fav part of this is damian beating the shit out of a joker stan. Enjoy!

NAME: Damian Wayne ALIAS: Robin DATE OF BIRTH: 5 September 1996 (approximate) BLOOD TYPE: O- (Full Medical History) EMERGENCY CONTACT: BW, DG AFFILIATIONS: Teen Titans, Team Ember EVAL: [File Encrypted] NOTES: |Robin| Eval needs to be de-encrypted. Any information contained therein cannot possibly be worse than not knowing |Nightwing| Yeah thats kind of a dick move B. Lol |Batman| Notes are to be relevant to the file in question not a space for airing personal grievances |Red Hood| Im airing my personal grievances here just to spite you. You suck |Batman| If this continues I will remove editing privileges for all of you |Red Hood| You still suck Editing on NOTES is locked

----

Damian got up early; patrol had ended before two AM last night, the city quiet and still in the early winter lull. A cold snap had settled across Gotham this past week, creeping in from the bay. Though it did not snow, the clear skies brought the temperature to well below freezing, which led to slow nights on patrol. The heat of summer pushed people outside relentlessly. The cold, on the other hand, made criminals lethargic and cautious, preferring to stay inside with their families.

So Damian rolled out of bed around nine in the morning, the sunlight shining into his window through blinds he had forgotten to draw last night. The first thing he did was take his phone from its perch on his bedside table and scroll through any new notifications. Both Iris and Lian had texted him. He responded to Iris’s but not Lian’s, then went to the bathroom to brush his teeth. Not ten minutes later he was in the drawing room downstairs, where Titus slept before the great brick fireplace, which was empty.

Damian patted his dog on the stomach, whistling through his teeth. “Come on,” he said, getting down on his knees and drumming his hands on Titus’s sturdy body. The dog lit up with energy, reaching up to lick Damian’s face, tail wagging furiously as he got to his feet. Damian scratched him behind his ears. “You ready for a run, boy? Come on, let’s get some exercise.”

Alfred appeared, hot coffee in hand. “Good morning, Damian,” he said. “Taking the dog for a walk?”

“Yes,” answered Damian, glancing around. “He’s been indoors too much lately because of the cold, he needs to stretch his legs.”

“You too?”

Damian offered Alfred a little grin. “Me too,” he agreed. “It’s slow out there.”

“And here I thought that was a good thing.”

“It is.” Titus bounded across the room excitedly, chasing his tail, ready for a walk. He started to paw at Damian’s leg, and Damian only held up one hand to indicate Stop. “Down. One moment, alright?” To Alfred, he asked, “Do you know what time my father got home last night?”

Alfred gave sort of a shrug. “Not long after you.”

“Oh,” said Damian. “When he wakes up will you tell him I’m heading to school later today? I’ve got an exam at three.”

Alfred made a face of enthusiastic pride. “Your first university exam,” he said, sounding impressed. “In which subject, may I ask?”

“Multivariable calculus,” Damian answered, kneeling down to rub Titus’s big head. “It’s simple stuff. A pre-req for applied math.”

“Not finance?”

Damian flashed that grin at Alfred once more. “I’m just testing out my options,” he said. “I have time.”

“Indeed you do,” agreed Alfred, with an approving nod. “In any case, good luck and I shall inform your father as soon as he wakes. Which,” he glanced at the grandfather clock in the hallway, and took a disapproving sip of coffee, “should be quite soon. He’s quite worse than you, isn’t he?”u

Damian opened the French doors to the back garden. With a wave to Alfred, he said, “We’ll be back,” and he whistled for Titus to follow him, then took off jogging past the flowerbeds. Coffee in hand, Alfred watched him go.

The morning was brisk, but Damian felt warm and alive underneath the early wintertime sun. Taking it slow, he scrolled through his phone, searching for an appropriate playlist, then tucked earbuds into his ears and his the phone itself into a holder at his bicep. Whistling once more at Titus, he took a wide berth around his vegetable garden, knowing that Titus was prone to digging around in it sometimes, upsetting his crops. From there he stayed close to the tree line, heading out across the Manor grounds. The route he liked to take eventually led to a field and a set of rolling hills littered with public paths; he preferred, however, to take a less intuitive path, slightly different every time and designed to get the most out of the slope of the hills.

Damian took great joy in his morning runs with Titus: it was productive and refreshing and outside, instead of careful training in the facilities under the Manor, which, though state-of-the-art, could feel a little claustrophobic. It was good, he thought, to get out of the house for a little while, out from under his father’s watchful eye. This was the same reason why he’d been spending so much time with the Titans lately.

Cutting through the edge of the woods, where the trees were sparse, Damian suddenly realized that Titus wasn’t following him anymore. When he glanced around, Titus was nowhere to be seen. He came to a stop and turned around, tugging his earbuds out.

It was mostly quiet, except for the wind shuddering the tree branches. Damian whistled. “Titus!” There was no response. Muttering an oath under his breath, Damian jogged back down the path he’d just cut. “Titus!” he called again, searching between the trees on either side of him. “Titus, come!”

His heart jumped as he heard suddenly a piteous whining, as if Titus were afraid of something, cowering in fear; with a little more urgency he headed into the woods, following the source of the sound. “Titus!”

Off the beaten path, obscured by some low underbrush, the scene Damian found jolted his stomach, making him feel immediately sick before his well-practiced professional instinct took over. “Titus,” he hissed, approaching the dog, who laid whining beside the ugly sight. Grabbing Titus’s collar, he tugged the dog away, retreating to a nearby tree. Titus whined as Damian took out his phone, but Damian just said, “Sit. Titus, sit,” and the dog did so, albeit reluctantly.

In Wayne Manor, Bruce Wayne’s personal cell phone, which sat neatly in a charging device by his bed, started to ring.

Bruce, raised his head groggily from the mess of sheets and limbs in which he typically slept. Narrowing his eyes at the screen of the phone, which displayed an close-up selfie of Damian’s annoyed face that Dick had assigned to his civilian contact, Bruce started at it for a moment before reaching out and plucking it off the charger.

“Damian?” he said, masterfully masking his confusion.

“Father,” replied Damian shortly, heading back to the path by the edge of the woods. “Did I wake you?”

“I – where are you?”

“A few miles away from home, almost at Brentwood. I took Titus for a run.” This was not unusual, but it was unusual for Damian to call home halfway through. Unsure what was happening, Bruce began, “Is…everything all right?”

“I found a body,” he said bluntly.

Bruce’s eyebrows shot up. “You what?”

“Well, Titus found it, really. It was sort of tucked off the main path, we never would’ve seen it had I not decided to loop around past the Kai estate. A boy,” Damian informed his father automatically, pausing to bark, “Titus, come,” before continuing, “maybe my age or slightly older. Wearing a Brentwood uniform.”

“Signs of assault?”

“No,” answered Damian. “Dead for a few hours now at the very least, but I can’t determine COD. Suppose we’ll have to wait for the coroner’s report.”

Sitting up in bed, calm and alert, Bruce began, “All right. Bring anything you’ve gathered back here and we can look into it tonight. Good work so far but for now the best thing to do would be to call the police-”

Damian interrupted him. “I already did,” he said. “Father, I’m sorry, I think you may be misunderstanding me? I wasn’t actually calling about the body, I’m calling to ask if you can come pick me up.”

Bruce blinked in surprise. “What?” he asked. “Why?”

“Because I already called the police and they’ll be here any minute, and I’ll have to act all traumatized because of the dead body, and anyway you know I don’t like civilian encounters with police without you.”

This more or less made sense, but it wasn’t what Bruce had meant. “What do you mean you aren’t calling about the body?”

“Oh,” said Damian, as if he hadn’t even thought of this. “Well. It’s by Brentwood.”

Again, Bruce did not immediately understand. “So?”

Almost apologetically, Damian said, “A five mile radius beyond campus limits…isn’t your jurisdiction, Father.”

It hit Bruce then with the force of a freight train: he, like a goddamn amateur idiot, had ceded actual turf to Damian’s pet side team made up of Gotham natives and sometimes headed by Damian’s closest friend in the city, Colin Wilkes, who boarded at Brentwood Academy on a Wayne Enterprises scholarship. The agreement itself had been a bit of a farce meant to keep the team out of trouble, given the specific area the Batman had permitted the team as their responsibility was located in the richest neighborhood in Bristol County, slightly outside Gotham city limits. He had not imagined that any terrible crime might go down five miles away from a wealthy private school, but in retrospect, of course it would.

“Damian,” said Bruce matter-of-factly. “I appreciate your loyalty to your friends,” he didn’t want to legitimize it by saying your team, and besides the Titans were more Damian’s team in any case, “but even you need to admit, this is out of their league.”

“This is one dead body,” answered Damian skeptically. “If that’s out of their league, they shouldn’t be doing this at all.”

“Well, perhaps that’s a fair point-”

“No,” said Damian shortly. “It’s not. You wouldn’t have given Ember her uniform if you really believed that.”

This was true enough, but frankly Bruce thought Ember was the only member of that team capable of joining the fight, and ideally he’d absorb her into the Batfamily at large before she got too committed to her own team. But this was not a conversation he wanted to have over the phone, so he shoved the sheets off the bed and said, “Don’t move for now, I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Will you hurry, please?” Damian asked, sounding bored and slightly annoyed. “I hate calling the cops.”

Getting out of bed, Bruce reminded him, “You should be used to it, it’s half of what we do on patrol.”

“Yes,” muttered Damian, hearing the distant wail of sirens. “But I’m not exactly in uniform at the moment, am I?”

Feeling a little awkward at the reminder of the constant presence of race in Damian’s life which Bruce could never really fully grasp, Bruce assured his son that he would be there very soon. As soon as he hung up Damian sent him a pin dropped into a map at his location.

Bruce arrived not long after the police; a detective was talking to Damian, taking down notes. Titus got anxious around people he didn’t know, so Damian had his fingers hooked around his collar, keeping him close. The detective – a rookie who Bruce didn’t recognize on sight – had a few questions for Bruce, then patted Damian’s shoulder reassuringly. Taking Bruce aside, he recommended considering having Damian speak to a professional about the trauma of the sight he’d just witnessed, and Bruce nodded in what he hoped looked like naïve paternal concern.

Damian coaxed Titus in the backseat of the car, then got in himself. Titus hung his big head in between the two front seats, panting from exertion and excitement.

On the ride back to the Manor, Damian mercilessly mocked the police. “Now, this is so traumatizing, but you’ve been awfully brave – for Christ’s sake, it’s like none of them have ever seen a dead body before.”

“Well,” said Bruce fairly, “most sixteen-year-olds haven’t, Damian.”

“It’s not as if it was violent,” Damian pointed out. “There wasn’t even any blood or anything.”

“Which is…curious,” said Bruce thoughtfully. “No external evidence of foul play. Suicide?” Phone in hand, Damian replied, “I already sent photos to Colin, he should be able to identify him and pull his school records. We’ll check for a history of depression or mental illness, but my gut tells me a Brentwood student wouldn’t stagger into the woods to kill himself unless it was going to be uglier than that.”

Bruce nodded; this made sense. “Could’ve been an accident. Alcohol poisoning, or an overdose.”

“I’m leaning towards overdose personally,” answered Damian, texting something on his phone. “Colin’s files should have any record of drug activity at the school. I’ll meet up with him and the others tonight and we’ll get started.”

There was an awkward sort of pause. Bruce began, “You know, if you or the rest of the team ever require any help-”

As the car came to a stop in the Wayne Manor garage, Damian shook his head, interrupting his father. “You’re micromanaging,” he pointed out. “I told you, they’re never going to get better if you keep stepping in and taking over their investigations.”

“I understand that,” replied Bruce, turning the car off. “I’m merely remarking upon the fact that they lack experience, and therefore could benefit from guidance.”

“Namely, me,” said Damian, watching his father. “I’m their guidance.” He waited for a moment, eyes on Bruce, as if expecting confirmation. Little tink-tink-tink sounds came from the car’s engine as it cooled. “Right?”

Bruce began, “You already have a team-”

“You have, like, four teams,” Damian countered. “Not to mention whatever secret society you’re funding this week.”

“A murder is serious business.”

“You don’t even know if it’s murder yet.”

“If it were-”

“-then you still wouldn’t be in any position to take this from them. Just,” Titus stuck his head forward again, whining, and Damian reached out to scratch his face. “Unclench, alright?” Damian asked his father. “I can handle this.” Bruce didn’t reply to this, so Damian got out of the car and opened the door for Titus, who happily jumped out and followed him back into the house.

Later that day, Damian drove to Princeton for his first college exam. He finished early, and called Colin on the drive home.

---

NAME: Colin Wilkes ALIAS: “Abuse” DATE OF BIRTH: 9 December 1996 BLOOD TYPE: AB+ (Full Medical History) EMERGENCY CONTACT: Jane Brown LSW, Caseworker AFFILIATIONS: Team Ember EVAL: Behavioral history of paranoia and violence in multiple foster homes, though likely a result of instability in childhood rather than pathological root. Experimentation by SCARECROW led to increased physical abilities through transformation which includes augmented strength (no evidence senses are affected) as well as moderate invulnerability. Venom appears to have had long-lasting effects on body chemistry despite its degradation.

Decent field skills complemented by extreme strength. Only cleared for patrol if transformed. hand-to-hand and weapons training negligible. Defense training and development of damage-resistant uniform necessary to compensate for tendency to take fire. Precision training vital for development of fine offensive skills.

NOTES: |Robin| Consistent attitude improvements since enrollment at Brentwood. Some instability with transformations likely due to a mental block, have seen improvement past 2-3 months

---

“You’ve got to get a permanent HQ,” said Damian, in full Robin uniform, standing before a laptop computer in an empty Brentwood Academy classroom.

“This is good though,” Colin insisted. “This way we’re close to the action, right?”

“Well,” Damian replied, trying not to hurt Colin’s feelings. “Yes, though it really isn’t worth the lack of security or tech resources. Batman operates almost solely out of the Cave, and you know that’s a bit removed from the city.”

Colin said, “I don’t have a house to stick a secret lair underneath, though.”

“I mean, yes,” Damian admitted, nodding. “But the point stands. Besides, most of your team has trouble getting all the way out here. Spoiler’s bike can only hold two people.”

“That works fine anyway, Jordan doesn’t need a ride.”

With a long-suffering inhalation, Damian gently corrected, “Jabberwock, Abuse. Jabberwock. We use codenames in the field.”

“Oh, yeah,” said Colin, clicking through some files on the computer. “My bad. Anyway.” He gestured towards the screen. “This is what I got so far.”

“Aren’t we going to wait for the others?”

“Oh, should we?”

“Ideally, yes, we should. But if you’ve any sensitive information to share with me first,” he gestured at the screen, “by all means.”

Colin hesitated for a moment, watching Damian. Then he began, “Well, you know how I was kind of sort of maybe dating Ethan a while ago? So it turns out-”

“Abuse,” interrupted Damian loudly, holding up a hand. “I don’t mean – I meant sensitive information related to the case. You can call me and update me on your social life any time, so let’s try to avoid it while in uniform, yes?”

A little hurt, Colin replied, “This is related to the case. The dead kid is Joey Fremont, OK, and his roommate is on the wrestling team with Ethan, and so a while ago Ethan asked me to go to one of the wrestling team parties after the meet, and I didn’t go ‘cause he was being weird cagey about us and I could tell he wanted to go as ‘friends’ and it was annoying because like I asked him out and everything so it’s not like he didn’t actually have like feelings-”

Softly, Damian reminded him, “The point, please.”

“OK, OK, so – Ethan heard from Joey’s roommate that he was dealing in some shady shit.”

A frown creased Damian’s brow. “Define ‘shady shit.’”

“Dealing,” Colin emphasized, as if that had made it obvious. “Like, drugs.” This seemed a little far-fetched. “Joseph Fremont, seventeen-year-old trust fund baby, was a drug-dealer?”

“Yeah. Some shady stuff.”

There it was again, shady, Colin’s favorite ambiguous descriptor. Damian felt a migraine coming on. “We’re still waiting on the tox report,” Damian told him. “But it’ll be easier if we know what to look for. Do you know what he was dealing?”

“Drugs,” said Colin.

“What kind of drugs? Cocaine? Heroin?”

“What the fuck, you think I know? I didn’t buy any shit from him.”

This was going to be harder than Damian thought. “Do you know anyone who did buy it?” he asked. “Maybe Ethan, or someone else on the wrestling team?” Offended, Colin told him, “Bitch, Ethan isn’t a fucking junkie.”

“Right, since you have impeccable taste in guys.”

“Wow,” said Colin, even more insulted. “That’s fucking rude.”

Damian was saved from trying to apologize for his completely correct and true reading of Colin’s limited dating history by a knock on the window. “Cavalry’s here,” he said, heading to open the window.

Ember and Spoiler slipped into the room. “We weren’t sure if we were supposed to use the door,” Spoiler explained. “We thought there might be cameras and stuff.”

“Abuse disabled them,” Damian said. “And we’re far enough from the center of campus that security doesn’t patrol here.”

“Oh, cool,” said Nell. She waved behind Damian. “Hey Colin.”

Before Damian could correct her, Colin impressed him by chiming in. “Abuse,” he said, grinning at her. “Only codenames.”

“Oh, shit, sorry!”

“It’s OK,” murmured Damian, going back to the laptop. “Is Jabberwock coming?”

“I haven’t heard from her,” answered Ellen, shrugging. “But I imagine if she was, she’d be picking up, um,” she gave a pointed pause, “you-know-who on her way over.”

“Who?” asked Damian.

“Voldemort,” said Nell, giggling.

He looked around at Colin, expecting an answer. Colin made a beckoning gesture with one finger, and Damian went over to him and leaned in. “Niloufar,” he whispered.

Damian pulled away, frowning. “Niloufar?” he echoed.

Colin took great pleasure in going, “Shh! Codenames only!”

“I don’t know who that is,” said Damian honestly. “Do they have a codename?”

“Not yet,” answered Nell, taking a seat on one of the desks. “She said she liked Angel or something, I think.”

“No, it wasn’t Angel,” Ellen said thoughtfully. “It was something Muslim I think. I can’t remember right now.”

Damian hesitated for a moment, then said to Ellen, “Whether or not Jabberwock brings her, can you send me her information later? We’ll do a background check.”

Ellen watched him for a moment, but beneath the scarlet mask her expression was indecipherable. “I can relay it to Oracle, if that’s what you mean.”

It wasn’t exactly, but it would do. He nodded. “Now. Let’s get to business. Abuse, would you brief your teammates on the case?”

Quickly, Colin got back to business. He did a decent job, though Damian interjected a few times with details that seem to have slipped Colin’s mind. Nell, in her caped eggplant-colored Spoiler costume, sat on one of the desks, whereas Ellen, her crimson-and-black uniform, took a seat, leaning forward over the desk thoughtfully. Her body language was tight and measured, inscrutable. When his mind wandered Damian found his gaze occasionally drawn to her, though it wasn’t really in attraction so much as curiosity. He still wondered exactly what she had done to prove herself to his father, who trusted her far beyond any other member of this burgeoning team.

The specifics of the case were this: Joseph Fremont, seventeen years old, white male, five-foot-eight inches, approximately a hundred and ninety pounds, had according to his roommate never made it back to his bedroom on the night of November the thirtieth, and had the following morning been discovered dead one-point-eight miles away from campus. They were still waiting on the physical evidence, but Robin had called them all together tonight so they could hit the ground running. Colin’s revelation that Joseph Fremont might have been dealing was kind of disappointing to Damian, as it suggested that the kid might’ve just been sampling the product and accidentally overdosed. Not that he wished a murder had occurred or anything, but a good old-fashioned mystery would’ve been perfect training for the young team.

When Colin told Ellen and Nell about the drugs, sparing them the details about how he knew, Ellen spoke up. “If he was dealing and there were no external signs of a struggle, don’t you think he probably just OD’d?” “Perhaps,” said Damian, chiming in from his spot in the shadows behind Colin. “But we have to consider all the possibilities.”

“What if his tox results come back positive for a shitload of heroin?” asked Nell.

“Then we’ll rule it an overdose,” Damian told her, feeling like he was talking to a bunch of infants, “unless we find evidence that suggests otherwise.”

“But what if it’s an actual murder but someone just like coerced him into taking a shitload of heroin so he died?”

“That’s why we look into anyone who might have motive,” said Damian. “Even if this looks cut-and-dried on the surface, if there’s someone who would benefit from Joseph Fremont’s death, then we tug on that string. Tug hard enough, and something always unravels.”

“The Fremonts are Wall Street money,” Ellen commented offhandedly. “I’m sure a lot of people would have motivation to target their family.”

“Right,” said Damian. “Ember, you look into potential suspects. Colin, dig into the drug connection. Maybe something went awry with his supplier.”

Nell asked, “What can I do?”

“Stay plugged in to our contact in the coroner’s office,” Damian told her. “We need to know what killed Joseph Fremont. Until we have that, there’s only so much we can do.”

“So you’re saying all we can do now is wait.”

“No,” said Damian coolly, turning to Ellen. That blank red mask was starting to bother him, making it impossible to read her. “I’m saying you can look into potential suspects so we can get ahead of the game.”

She watched him for a moment. “So you do think it’s a murder, though?”

“I think it’s suspicious that our victim wound up two miles away from campus, in the middle of the woods,” Damian told her. “And I find it unlikely that no one knows any specifics about what occurred. Our job is to apply pressure until the cracks become evident, and then plug the leaks when we find them.”

Ellen ran her hands down her long braid. “I think that’s a mixed metaphor,” she said.

It wasn’t, though it admittedly was kind of clumsy. He ignored this comment, turning instead to Abuse. “I’ll find somewhere more secure to use as headquarters. In the meantime, collect your research. Remember to keep it all under secure encryption using the tech I gave you.”

Nell raised her hand. Damian looked at her, then did a double take, then Ellen reached out and pulled her wrist downwards. “You don’t have to raise your hand,” Ellen told her.

“Oh,” said Nell. “OK, sorry, but sidenote, are we allowed to use the computers you gave us for like, other things?”

“They’re yours,” said Damian. “Use them for whatever you need. All of your encrypted files go to a drive that Batman and I can access, but other than that you can do what you want with it.” “OK, cool,” said Nell. “I was just asking because I use it for homework.”

Colin threw his arm around Damian’s shoulders, hanging onto his neck. Poking him in the ribs, he told Nell, “Just ask Robin for another separate homework computer, that’s what I did.”

Though Nell’s eyes lit up, Ellen spoke before she could. Leaning back in her seat, she said smoothly, “I’m sure Robin doesn’t have the time to play sugar daddy to all of us, Abuse.”

“No,” agreed Damian. “Fortunately Batman plays the part very well for you, doesn’t he, Ember?” There was a silence so deep they could hear a pin drop. Damian felt belligerent and annoyed, and didn’t immediately regret the comment. He knew the grants and the scholarships and the job offers that had been extended to Ellen Nayar, and he didn’t think she had any right to sound so dismissive of his family’s generosity.

Though Damian could not Ellen’s gaze behind her mask, she turned her head away from him first, indicative of breaking first.

When she and Nell left, Ellen did not say a farewell to Robin.

---

NAME: Danielle Little ALIAS: Spoiler DATE OF BIRTH: 29 June 1997 BLOOD TYPE: O+ (Full Medical History) EMERGENCY CONTACT: Rhonda Holmes Little, Mother (Contact) AFFILIATIONS: Batgirl (Formerly), Team Ember EVAL: Promising but untrained. Investigative instincts are excellent, but more practice is necessary. Very young and inexperienced, though a strong devotion to local community and neighborhoods is a good foundation for future efforts. Potentially a place for her in the Batman Inc. hierarchy whether as an official agent or otherwise.

---

As dusk arrived the next night, Bruce sat in front of the computer in the Cave as Damian worked on some complex tech designs at the workstation below the computer hub. There was a comfortable quiet apart from the usual whir of machinery and fluttering wings of the bats in the eaves. All at once, the silence was broken by a gentle beeping notification coming from both the computer and Damian’s phone.

Not a moment later, Damian was skipping the stairs two at a time, practically sprinting to the locker room area where his uniform was kept. “Oracle,” said Bruce, hitting a button on the panel before him, “get Jim on the line.” Damian emerged, in full uniform except for his mask though his cap was only half fastened and his boots weren’t laced yet, while Bruce was still on the line with Commissioner Gordon. “I’ll look into it personally,” he was saying. “I’ll be in touch.”

Bruce closed the line and turned around in his seat to look at Damian, who stood there defiantly. He pointed at Bruce with one accusatory finger, then began, “You promised-”

Stoically, Bruce replied, “This could be very dangerous, Damian, and it would be irresponsible to let a bunch of inexperienced teenagers deal with something of this magnitude.”

“You promised,” repeated Damian stubbornly. “You told me this would be our jurisdiction, and that you would allow us freedom to pursue this mission on our own time.”

“Us?” echoed Bruce mildly. “So as soon as the mission interests you, it becomes us rather than them?”

Rolling his eyes, Damian headed down to the garage below, where his motorcycle was kept. Raising his voice to be heard, he called, “I’m their leader, so-”

“Ember’s their leader.”

Damian stopped on the staircase, then went back up so he could look at his father. “I’m their leader,” he said again, offended.

Bruce shook his head. “This team is designed to be closer to the ground than we are. You don’t have their experience when it comes to the city itself.”

“I patrol the city every single night,” Damian protested. “I know it just fine.”

“That may very well be true, but you still don’t have their urban expertise.”

“Urb-?” Damian broke off suspiciously, watching his father. Then he leaned against the rail of the stairs slightly and asked, “Is this a race thing?”

Bruce glanced around at him, an eyebrow raised. “A what thing?”

“Are you being,” he paused, didn’t know what else to call it, so went with, “…racist?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Urban is just one of those dog whistle words that means people of color,” explained Damian; he was taking a sociology class at Princeton, and he’d just read a chapter of a book about this. “And since this team is mostly that, you emphasizing that their street smarts and inner city experience feels almost as if…” he trailed off, feeling suddenly uncertain under his father’s gaze. “I’m just saying,” he said, unwilling to admit his doubt. “You may want to…think about the way you talk about them, is all.”

Bruce watched his son, surprised. Despite the fact that Damian’s words weren’t exactly flattering, he felt an odd stirring of pride. He nodded. “Alright,” he said. “I will.”

There was an awkward sort of pause, and then Damian headed once more down the stairs. Though it was just barely dark outside, he took his motorcycle to the hidden entrance to the Bunker, where he did some minor rearrangements and set up what basically amounted to parental controls on the computers. Satisfied, he alerted the entire team that they would be meeting beneath Wayne Tower tonight.

This time, Jordan and Niloufar were there first. “Ms. Ghorbani,” he said, holding out his hand to the girl in the headscarf, “a pleasure to meet you.”

Niloufar shook his hand warily. “We’ve met before,” she told him shortly. “One time you and Batman saved a school bus I was in from tipping off a bridge.”

When in uniform, Damian got comments like that all the time. Though a school bus falling off a bridge was far more memorable than most of the everyday encounters he had with citizens of Gotham, it still didn’t ring a bell. “That sounds like us,” he told her, with a killer smile. She just watched him suspiciously.

Jordan, who had been using her powers of flight constantly since they manifested, floated near the low ceiling of the Bunker. “I don’t like it in here,” she said. “Feels cramped.”

“It’s merely temporary, Jabberwock,” Damian informed her, heading to the computer. “It’s not an ideal location for your team, but I needed some place with the technical capabilities to fill you in completely on the status of your mission.”

“Our mission?” Jordan echoed. “You mean the dead kid from Brentwood?”

Damian nodded, typing something into the computer. “Joseph Fremont.”

Niloufar asked, “Is this about the results from the tox report?”

The file on the computer unopened, Damian stopped and turned around to face her. “What do you know about the tox report?” he asked her.

“I’ve heard things,” she said shortly.

He eyed her, then began, “How do you-?” but before he could finish, the doors to the garage opened and Ellen arrived with Nell and Colin.

“Hey,” said Nell breathlessly, her laptop underneath her arm. “I might have to leave early, I have a lot of homework to do.”

“That’s fine,” Damian said, looking past Niloufar and Jordan at her. “There’ve been some new developments in the case and I just need to make sure we’re all on the same page about it.”

“Hey,” said Jordan, floating upside-down, her ponytail hanging down from the back of her head, “I have a question.”

Suppressing a roll of his eyes, Damian looked at her. “Yes?”

“This kid OD’d, right?”

“Yes,” repeated Damian, “and I’m about to get into the specifics of what exactly he-”

“But like. Why should we care about him?”

The silence that followed this comment deepened considerably, broken only by the hum and whir of the high tech machinery surrounding them. “Jabberwock,” he said, “if you have to ask that question, then maybe you shouldn’t be here.”

Before Damian had even finished this sentence, Jordan was shaking her head. “No,” she said. “I mean like, specifically him. There’s a dozen cases of this same thing every day on my block, and no one’s investigating that shit.”

Damian explained, “This death occurred in your team’s jurisdiction-” but Ellen interrupted him.

“She has a point,” she said, glancing at Damian. “It does seem a little biased that we suddenly care about an overdose as soon as it happens to a rich white kid. And I have wondered before why Batman decided we don’t get jurisdiction,” she framed it in air quotes, “over our own neighborhoods, especially because Jordan’s right, this kind of thing happens all the time in the city.”

“OK,” said Damian, trying very hard to exercise patience, “well. When one of your neighbors overdoses on recreationally-developed Joker Venom, then perhaps we can look into that.”

A frisson of excitement went through the Bunker, eyebrows raising in surprise. “Joker Venom?” echoed Colin, sounding almost delighted. “Joey got offed by the Joker?”

“No,” said Ellen, a slight frown on her face. When she watched Damian as intently as she was doing now, he could almost tune out the scar, imagine exactly what she might look like without it. “Robin said – recreationally-developed? You think this kid was using Joker Venom to get high?”

Damian nodded. “It gets worse.”

Seated at one of the specimen analysis desks, her laptop computer already open, Nell asked, “How could it get worse than the Joker?”

Damian pulled something up on the computer screen. “A few years ago – back with the previous Batman – there was a case that involved a drug called diaxamene which was reverse-engineered to attack the part of the brain which controls emotion, blunting the ability to feel empathy.”

“Turn them into sociopaths,” Jordan said, sounding almost impressed.

“Psychopaths,” Damian corrected. “But, yes. Essentially.”

“Diaxamene,” echoed Niloufar, her gaze far away behind her thick glasses. “That sounds familiar. Didn’t it have something to do with a baby formula recall?”

Clearly surprised that Niloufar knew this, Damian stopped short and looked around at her. “Yes,” he said, nodding. “The perp claimed to have dosed baby formula, though no evidence could confirm this. There was a recall just in case, though, which led to a shortage.”

“Yeah, I remember,” said Niloufar, nodding. At Damian’s curious look, she finally added, “My younger brother was a baby at the time. I remember formula got really expensive.”

Without replying to this, Damian nodded, then looked at her for a moment longer.

Then he returned to the computer screen. “It looks like small amounts of Joker Venom were added to the reverse-engineered diaxamene. Because Joker Venom produces effects similar to psychopathy before resulting in death, diluting it with the diaxamene can reproduce the same feeling while decreasing its lethality.”

“He still died, though,” Nell pointed out.

Damian nodded. “It’s called an overdose for a reason, Spoiler.”

“Oh,” she said. “Right.”

“The modified diaxamene is a pharmaceutical, though,” said Niloufar, considering this. “It’s supposed to function long-term, not for a temporary high.”

“Exactly,” said Damian. “For a young person like Joseph Fremont, the mild Joker Venom would have a slight narcotic effect while the diaxamene, if he even knew it was part of the drug, would be – nothing more than a placebo. At first.”

Ellen nodded. “So what his death tells us,” she began, “is that this drug is on the market. That people are using it, and the more they use it, the more psychopathic they become.”

“Yes,” said Damian, feeling an odd rush of pride at how quickly the team put this together. “That’s the real problem here. Someone’s pulling the same stunt as the baby formula plan, but aging up their demographic.”

“Why not cut it with coke?” asked Jordan, seriously. “Or dope or something?”

“’Cause it’s Joker Venom,” Ellen said, looking over at her as if this were obvious. “It has sex appeal.”

Nell giggled, and Colin asked, “What about the Joker says sex appeal to you?”

“Ember’s right,” said Damian, shutting the others up. “How many of you have seen firsthand some result of the Joker’s crimes?”

Everyone except for Niloufar raised their hand without hesitation, but Niloufar eventually followed suit, making a noncommittal kinda sorta gesture with her hand.

“Joseph Fremont never lived in the city,” Damian continued. “If you live in the wealthy suburbs your whole life, the Joker is something of a myth, and as a result anything with some proximity to him has a certain thrill to it – like forbidden fruit. It’s the perfect new drug to introduce to a privileged private school like Brentwood.”

“Plus rich white boys are already a little psychopathic,” Jordan added.

Damian decided to give her that one. “And that.”

Despite this, Ellen didn’t seem fully satisfied. “But no one bothers to do a full tox report on a bum who OD’d in an alley in Midtown,” she pointed out. “This drug could be way more rampant than we thought.”

Considering this, Damian answered, “True, but we haven’t seen the resultant wave of crime or violence you’d expect from that.” “That’s assuming the drug has been out there for long enough. And Gotham streets are always full of crime and violence. How would you be able to tell the difference?” He shook his head. “There’s no difference on patrol.”

“You haven’t been on patrol all that often lately, though,” Colin said fairly, tapping his chin thoughtfully. “You’ve been with your other team a lot.”

Inwardly, Damian cursed Colin’s lack of filter. Ellen’s eyebrow cocked, but it was Nell who asked, “What other team?”

Jordan grinned at him. “Are you cheating on us, Robin?”

“It’s the Teen Titans,” he said stoically. “Yes, I am frequently away with them. But Batman and Oracle keep a careful record of nightly criminal activity, which has not shown any major spikes lately.”

“What’s Superboy like?” asked Jordan, legs crossed, sitting in air. “Just like a mini Superman?”

Chris was in fact very dissimilar to his adoptive father, so Damian replied, with a hint of annoyance, “No, actually. Now if we can get back to business-”

“What about Arsenal?” asked Nell, from her computer. “She seems cool.”

With a knowing grin, Colin added, “Not as cool as Impulse, huh, Robin?” Damian shot him a dirty look. “Let’s try to focus, shall we?”

“Ohh,” said Nell, laughing. “Wait, Robin, is she your girlfriend?”

For fuck’s sake. As he opened his mouth to shut this down for good, Ellen mercifully came to his rescue. “Come on,” she said, sounding sympathetic. “Don’t tease him, Spoiler, that’s mean.”

Which, naturally, set his blood boiling again. “Ember, please,” he told her. “It’s fine. Now. Back to the case?”

She gave him a wry, enigmatic smile, but nodded all the same, gesturing for him to continue.

His face felt warm, and he felt stupid for allowing himself to feel even the slightest bit self-conscious. “Some excellent thinking happened tonight, team, so thank you for that. Now that we all know where we stand, it’s time to get serious about this case.”

Doubtfully, Colin asked, “We weren’t serious until just now?”

“I mean we have a lead,” said Damian quickly. “That’s all. Niloufar, Jabberwock, I want you two looking into other recent overdose cases throughout the city, see if we’re missing something.”

“Seraph,” said Niloufar.

Damian blinked. “I’m sorry?”

“Seraph,” repeated Niloufar. “That’s my codename. I mean, it was Hafaza, but then we figured that was a little harder for people to remember and the key to a good codename is its memorability, right? Like, branding.” She paused, a little awkward. “So. Seraph.”

He watched her for a moment, then nodded. “Alright. Seraph, then. Usually the codename is accompanied by a uniform, though.”

Apologetically, she admitted, “I’m probably not…super useful in the field.” At Damian’s expressions, she explained, “I failed P.E. last year.”

Damian only had the vaguest notion what P.E. was, but he waved it aside. “Fine,” he said. “If you do need a uniform, Batman and I can help. Abuse,” he said, turning to Colin. “Have you dug up anything else at Brentwood?”

Colin shook his head. “Not really? I think Joey’s roommate was clean, actually. He wasn’t dealing anything hard, just weed. I lit up with him the other day and he told me everything. He’s kind of fucked up over it actually, it’s kind of sad.”

“Great,” said Damian. “Generally I would request that you try to avoid partaking in illicit substances, but otherwise, sure.”

“Robin,” said Jordan, with a grin. “C’mon. It’s just weed.”

“OK,” said Damian, ignoring this. “Keep pushing, Abuse. If you need backup, call me.”

“Or me,” offered Niloufar. When Damian glanced at her, she added, “I go to Brentwood too. So I can help with that.”

This was a relief; Colin was competent enough in the field, but his investigative work was still spotty. Damian had been considering an undercover mission in Brentwood himself to get the intel they needed, but if Niloufar also attended the school then she might be able to bolster Colin’s mission. “Perfect,” he said. “Seraph, you get double duty – work with both Jabberwock and Abuse.”

Niloufar practically glowed at the extra responsibility.

“Ember, Spoiler, you’re going to be investigating the Joker connection,” he continued. “Ember, I understand you have some familiarity with Arkham? This is your chance to demonstrate that. Meanwhile, I’ll-”

Just then, he realized Nell’s hand was up in the air again.

“Spoiler,” he said tiredly. “I’ve told you this a dozen times, you don’t need to raise your hand to ask permission to speak.” “Oh,” she said, lowering her arm. “Sorry! I didn’t want to interrupt.”

“It’s fine,” Damian told her, waving this away. “What is it?”

“Would it be possible for me to sit this one out? I’m failing geometry.”

Damian blinked at her. “You’re failing what?” he asked.

“Geometry,” she repeated. “Tenth grade math.”

Damian, who had mastered geometry when he was seven, felt suddenly and abruptly out of his depth. “Oh,” he said. “Yes, of course. That’s fine. All of you, never hesitate to tell me if you feel like you’re taking on too much. It’s fine. Civilian responsibilities come first.”

There was an awkward sort of pause.

Then he restarted, “Ember, I suppose that means I’ll be with you. We’ll also look at the previous case regarding diaxamene, but I’ll need a few days to round up my resources on that. I’ll contact you when I’m ready.”

“Fine,” said Ellen. “Anything else you need to update us on?”

Thoughtfully, Damian looked back at the screen. “No, I don’t think so. We’re dealing with a high tech trafficking ring by the docks again so if any of you find any unfamiliar weaponry or anything let me or Oracle know. Oh,” he said, turning around to face them again. “And I suppose I should warn you about something.”

They all leaned in a little, as if intrigued by the hint of danger.

Almost regretfully, Damian informed them all, “Batman is likely going to try and edge in on this case. He takes everything involving the Joker very personally, so I can almost guarantee he’ll try to take over. At the very least he’ll try to insert himself in an observational role.”

“That’s not so bad,” countered Jordan. “Batman’s welcome to observationally roll me whenever he likes.” Colin laughed, obviously in agreement.

Damian tried to keep his expression level. “My point is,” he restarted, “this is your mission and you all can take care of it perfectly well without his help. Don’t let him take this one from you.” He paused, looking around at them. “So. We’re all clear?”

“Super clear,” agreed Colin. “I’m gonna head back to school and get a jump on this.”

“Hold on,” said Niloufar, her gaze swiveling around towards him. “That’s not fair, I don’t board at school so I won’t be able to help out until tomorrow.”

“Um, I just said get a jump on it,” Colin pointed out. “I didn’t say I’d solve absolutely everything so you don’t have anything to do.”

“Abuse is right,” added Damian. “He can probably get a lot more done after hours than you can during classroom time. I’m sure he’ll fill you in on any developments in the morning.”

Niloufar shot a glare towards Colin, but he shrugged and relented. “Yeah, for sure.”

“We’ll get started, then,” said Jordan. “If we find anything out we’ll ping you or share it on the vigilante cloud or whatever.”

“Thank you,” said Damian, as Jordan and Niloufar began to leave. “Good luck.”

After them Colin headed out to return to Brentwood and Ellen, the only one of the team cleared for patrol on her own, also took off. Damian went over to where Nell still worked on her laptop. “If you need a tutor,” he said, peering over her shoulder, “I’m happy to help.”

“You kind of already are,” she told him distractedly, focused on her work.

He raised an eyebrow. “How so?”

Glancing at him, she explained, “I’m going to the Neon Knights center in my neighborhood for tutoring, so it’s cool. I guess I meant your family’s already helping out.”

Damian stared at her for a moment. Though he knew rationally that the entire team had enough information at this point to deduce Batman’s identity and therefore his own, it was still a new and unfamiliar feeling, like danger. It set him on edge, despite the fact that they never would have let Nell or the others into the game in the first place if they didn’t trust them enough to be discreet.

“Sure,” he said, straightening up. “Though I shouldn’t have to remind you not to talk like that when we’re in uniform.”

This seemed to confuse her, as she finally took pause to glance up at him. “But…nobody’s here.” “I know, but it’s a matter of developing a habit. If the mask is on,” he pointed to his face, “then I’m Robin. Only Robin. Do you understand me?”

She nodded. “I got you.”

“Good.” He hesitated, then added, “If you’d like you can stay here to do your work. I can program everything to shut down and lock up after you leave.” This too drew her gaze away from the computer. She looked at Damian with big eyes, surprised and a little touched. “Wow,” she said. “For real? That would be super great.”

“OK.” He shrugged, feeling a slight twinge of self-consciousness he normally only felt around Iris. He tried to push that out of his mind. “It’s no problem. And again, let me know if you need help.”

“Yeah,” she said, beaming at him. “I will.”

---

NAME: Jordan Aguilar Joyce ALIAS: Wonder Girl / Jabberwock DATE OF BIRTH: 17 March 1995 BLOOD TYPE: B+ (Full Medical History) EMERGENCY CONTACT: Maya Aguilar, Sister (Contact) AFFILIATIONS: Wonder Woman, Team Ember EVAL: Flight, augmented senses and strength from Themysciran heritage. Will follow-up with Diana. Deeply resistant to authority, but loyal to team. Need to develop discipline before regular patrol is instated.

---

“So Abuse and Seraph managed to get a lead on the Brentwood supplier – turns out a few of the older boys had been recruited by someone called the Dealer.”

“Not very creative,” replied Ellen through her commlink, peering down at the city from the corner of a tall roof.

“Yes,” answered Damian, “particularly because we dealt with someone using that name a few years ago, around the same time as the diaxamene case. In fact, the man who reverse-engineered the diaxamene actually bought outdated Joker Venom from the Dealer.”

“Oh,” said Ellen, a little taken aback. “Then – that should sort of blow the case open, right? It’s the same guy.”

“Impossible,” said Damian grimly. “The man in question has been locked up in a mental facility for years.”

“In Arkham?”

“No. I believe it’s somewhere in Chicago, far away from here. Besides, the version of the Joker Venom found in this new drug isn’t old or decayed at all, it’s very new, something we haven’t quite seen before, impossible to build up a resistance to. Enough of it would probably poison even the Joker himself.”

“If our guy can reverse-engineer a prescription drug, I’m sure he could figure out how to update Joker Venom. And if he’s not at Arkham why are we even going there in the first place?”

“Because,” Damian answered shortly, “sometimes you have to play with vermin to sniff out a rat.” This was cryptic and annoying, and beneath her mask Ellen rolled her eyes. “OK. I can meet you there in an hour if-”

“No need,” he said, just as the sleek and quiet hum of an energy-efficient stealth motorcycle came buzzing down the alley beneath the building on which Ellen stood. Robin stopped the bike, got off, and waved at her.

She let out a sigh, then made her way down on the fire escape, jumping the last few feet. “How did you know where I was?” she asked, as he got back onto the motorcycle.

“The tracer Batman put in your suit,” he answered; when she gave him a look, refusing to get on the bike with him, he grinned a little and added, “I’m kidding. But only a little. When you’re on a direct line, Oracle can pinpoint your location. If you toggled a private line or turned off your commlink, we’d lose you.”

“Wouldn’t want that,” muttered Ellen, finally relenting and climbing onto the back of the motorcycle, behind him. She sat further back than was entirely necessary.

They went most of the way in relative silence. They’d worked enough together – Damian had spent enough time training with her – that it wasn’t particularly awkward, but there was an odd degree of discomfort that neither of them were used to. When they made it to Arkham, stowing the bike in the woods behind it, Damian asked, “That reminds me, when are you going to get a motorbike of your own? You can’t rely on rides from Spoiler and Abuse and me forever.”

“I don’t have my license,” she explained. She wanted to add, And I can’t afford one, but she knew that he would offer and insist and that would be unfortunate.

“Oh,” said Damian, as if this hadn’t occurred to him. “Well. You don’t really need one, in our line of work.” “Thanks,” she said, though her smile was not visible beneath her mask. “But I’m already toeing the line as is. I’d prefer to break as few laws as possible.”

“She says,” he added, grinning slightly as they headed towards Gotham, “as we break into a private mental facility in order to interrogate a patient.”

“He’s a criminal,” she replied smoothly. “Not a patient.”

Damian shrugged. “They all are.”

This wasn’t true, and Ellen wanted to fight him on it, but this wasn’t the time or the place. With the help of Robin’s gadgets and expertise, making it into Arkham was easier than it had ever been for Ellen – he did it with such nonchalance and finesse that it seemed positively casual for him. That sort of annoyed her.

They made it to the Wayne Ward, which is where the most dangerous criminals were held, cut off from the rest of the world by thick steel doors. Somewhere in one of the cages, someone sang a children’s song. “Little Bunny Foo-Foo, hopping through the forest…”

Another inmate moaned, “Shut the fuck up.”

Damian brought her to an unmarked cell that looked no different from any of the others, and put his hand on the door, behind which the Joker still sang. “Scooping up the field mice and boppin’ them on the head…”

Quietly, he asked, “You ready?” She nodded, but didn’t speak. Looking away from her, he punched a series of numbers into the keypad by the door, and it slid open.

He gestured for her to enter, and she did. He followed behind her, and the steel door clanged behind them.

A pale man in an Arkham uniform sat cross-legged facing the wall across from them. “Down came the good fairy, and she said…”

“Joker,” said Damian.

The Joker’s head lolled back on his shoulders, his dirty green hair hanging down from his scalp. He did not look around.

“Ah,” he began, his voice sickly sweet. “It’s my second-favorite little birdie. You’d be third favorite,” he said, almost reasonably, “but the dead one came back, and that’s no fun.”

“Joker,” repeated Damian. “What do you know about a new version of your Venom?”

Though he still did not turn around, the Joker made an unpleasant sound in the back of his throat, as if displeased. “None of that faker stuff. I’m no street corner dealer, little Robbie! I only have big plans, big shows, big-” he threw out both arms theatrically; in his left, he held a crowbar stained with blood, “-drama.”

Without hesitating, Damian moved forward and grabbed hold of the crowbar, kicking in the Joker’s elbow as he did so. As Damian inspected it, the Joker started to laugh, then collapsed and rolled around on the floor so he was facing the door.

“Where’d you get this?” asked Damian stoically, raising the crowbar.

“Beirut,” answered the Joker.

Damian shook the crowbar. “Whose blood is this?”

“Yours,” answered the Joker. “Robin’s. Doesn’t matter which one, best not to get attached,” he looked past Damian, as if addressed Ellen directly, “they’re just gonna break your heart and move on. They always do.”

Uncertainly, Ellen glanced at Damian, who only stared at the Joker.

He raised the crowbar, and hit the Joker across the face with it. Again, the Joker laughed. “What do you mean that fake stuff?” asked Damian. “So you know someone’s dealing.”

“Everyone’s always dealing,” Joker answered, with a shrug. “You know, dealing, coping, the human condition.” “How do you know about the drugs?”

The Joker lunged suddenly, throwing himself at Damian, grabbing hold of the crowbar tightly. Ellen instinctively moved to help, but Damian dodged, gripping the crowbar tightly and wrenching him away so that the Joker lost his balance and fell, half laying on the ground, still clutching the crowbar. He laughed and laughed.

“The drugs?” he screeched, ecstatic. “You mean the Xanax? Oh, no, you mean the painkillers? Or are you talking about the meth, because that was what really made her spiral, huh? Just took a little while to get there, step by prescription step, and then all of the sudden bam!” His laughter turned higher, more frantic. He held up one hand in the gesture of a gun and pointed it right at Ellen’s face. “Right in the kisser!”

Horrified, Ellen stared at him, frozen. It took Damian a moment to realize what was going on, and then he kicked the Joker square in the chest, sending him reeling back to the floor. “I miss Divya!” he called, as Damian, turned around returned to the door, taking Ellen’s wrist in his hand as he did so. “She was so much fun! Good stories! She missed you bad you know, she missed her beautiful son, her beautiful little-”

A name came out of Joker’s mouth that Damian didn’t know, but he could guess what it was. “Come on,” he murmured to Ellen, who said nothing, her face obscured and made unreadable by her mask. As the Joker laughed and laughed and laughed, Damian led Ellen out of the Joker’s cell, ensured the door was closed tight, and they retreated out of Arkham. After a while Ellen pulled her hand away from Damian’s. He said nothing until they were outside.

In the darkness, he turned to her heavily.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I shouldn’t have brought you in there.”

“No,” said Ellen, shaking her head. “It’s fine. I had to meet him eventually.”

“I don’t know how he knew that about you.”

“It’s fine,” repeated Ellen, with a little more urgency. She tried to smile at him from underneath the mask, but obviously he couldn’t see it.

Damian watched her cautiously for a moment longer, then suddenly jerked his head around, obviously hearing something at his commlink. Then his gaze lengthened past Ellen, behind her, and under his breath he muttered, “For fuck’s sake-”

Despite the fact that Batman, from behind Ellen, should not have been able to hear this, he growled, “Language, Robin,” and Damian resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

Ellen turned around uncertainly; she had only very infrequently been in the presence of both Batman and Robin, and didn’t really have the hang of their dynamic yet.

Batman stood impassively before them both, watching them. “Are you here to talk to the Joker?” he asked, as if reserving judgment.

“We already did,” Damian told him. “He didn’t have anything useful to say.”

Thinking this was underselling the encounter a little, Ellen added, “He seemed to know a version of his Venom was being used on the streets,” Damian gave her an urgent look, like betrayal, so she continued, “but Robin’s right. He didn’t sound like he was involved in or even really approved of its production.”

Batman gestured at the crowbar in Damian’s hand. “What’s that?”

“A crowbar,” answered Damian.

Batman only watched him.

Damian held it up. “A man known as the Dealer tried to auction off an item just like this a few years ago,” he said, almost defiantly. “Nightwing brought it home, but he never entered it into evidence. He just got rid of it.”

“Why?” asked Batman.

“So you wouldn’t find out,” said Damian, “for obvious reasons.”

Ellen wasn’t sure what that obvious reason was, but she just glanced in between Robin and Batman, sensing the tension there.

Stubbornly, Damian continued, “The Joker was a red herring last time and I believe it’s the same thing this time around. We should be focusing our efforts elsewhere.”

“Hn.” Batman headed past them, towards Arkham. “I’ll talk to the Joker.”

As Batman passed, Robin reached out and physically took hold of his arm. “No,” he said. “You won’t.”

Batman twisted around to look back at Damian, and there was a moment of deadly, pin-drop silence.

“It’s my case,” insisted Damian.

Batman glanced up at Ellen. “It’s her case.”

Beneath her mask, Ellen’s eyebrows shot up. Reluctantly, Damian let go of Batman and turned to her. “Fine,” he said. “Ember. What do you think? Do you want a second opinion on the Joker, or do you think we should be able to proceed on our own from here?”

There was no expression on Batman’s face, but then again Ellen didn’t think there was ever really any discernible expression on Batman’s face. Once more she glanced in between Batman and Robin, before finally admitting, “I…think we should be OK.” To Batman, she said, “I’ve studied your case files and I don’t really think this fits the Joker’s M.O. Right now selling drugs to rich kids sounds a lot more like this Dealer character, or maybe, um, what’s his face, that guy who poisoned the diaxamene.”

Damian winced slightly when she said this and she suddenly feared she’d said too much; maybe there was something he’d been trying to keep from Batman. Though she didn’t really think that was all that smart – Robin’s pride be damned, this was about solving the case, not who got the glory of figuring it out.

Batman watched her for a moment, then nodded. “I expect a mission report,” he said.

“Of course,” responded Damian sourly.

Without looking around, Batman added, “I meant from Ember.”

Damian looked almost ready to blow a gasket, but he kept his mouth shut and nodded. Batman lingered for a moment longer, then swept away.

There was an awkward sort of pause. Damian turned and headed back to where the motorcycle was stowed in the woods. “C’mon,” he said.

She followed him, secretly a little pleased at this indication of Batman’s trust but also not wanting to push Damian at all. It was a weird place to be, staying quiet for fear of hurting Robin’s feelings – but then again, he was only a kid, at least a couple years younger than her. There was no need to be cruel.

A minute or so after he revved the bike and they started heading back towards the city, he asked, “Are you hungry?” His words came through clearly on her commlink, and yet she was still certain she had misheard. “Um. Sure?”

“I know a place,” he continued, taking a sharp left. “Up by Amusement Mile.”

Amusement Mile meant carnival food of some sort probably, which was fine by Ellen. Late at night as it was, the boardwalk was still all lit up neon, but Damian avoided that, heading instead for the less touristy area. There was a little shop – not much more than a booth – where he ordered falafel. Ellen got a kabob. The woman working there spoke warmly with Damian in a language Ellen didn’t know, but eventually she picked up that the woman was refusing to accept payment when Damian tried to pass it over the counter to her. He just grinned and stuffed a twenty dollar bill into the tip jar, and the woman laughed.

They sat together on the rail of the pier, which was already closed for the night. She lifted her mask to eat, then took it off completely, leaving only a domino mask around her eyes.

“Hey,” she said, nudging him a little. “Are you OK?”

He looked around at her, confused. “What? Why?”

“Your dad was kind of harsh on you. He didn’t really need to be, I know you have more experience at this than I do.” For a moment he said nothing, just watching her. Then he looked back down at his falafel wrap. “You shouldn’t refer to him as my father when we’re in the field,” he said. “Things like that are supposed to stay in a civilian context only.”

“Mmm, be careful about that. Everybody knows Robin is either Batman’s son or something a whole lot less wholesome, so I really think you should take what you can get.”

She smiled at him, but he didn’t smile back, only looked at his wrap unhappily.

When he didn’t reply, she too looked down at her food, picking at it. She hadn’t been that hungry, but would’ve felt stupid turning down free food.

Softly, she asked, “How do you think he knew all that about me?”

Damian glanced at her. “Who?” he asked. “The Joker?” She nodded, and he considered this for a moment. “He knows everything about everyone. Don’t take it personally. He knows how to get under everyone’s skin, we’ve all been there.”

“He knew my…” she trailed off. “He knew my mother’s name.” He gave a shrug. “She was in Arkham, right?”

“Yeah, but – not in the Wayne Ward. Not with him.”

“No?” asked Damian, with mild interest. “What was she in for, then?”

Glowering, Ellen muttered, “As if Batman doesn’t have a file with all the sordid details.”

“He doesn’t,” answered Damian. “Or at least not one I have access to.”

For a while, so long that Damian didn’t think she was going to answer, Ellen said nothing. Then, her eyes fixed out across the black water of the ocean, waves lit by moonlight, she said, “She…was transferred. For the Wayne Enterprises drug rehabilitation program.”

“Ah,” said Damian, nodding. “Yes. I understand that whole project was – a massive PR disaster.”

“You could call it that,” Ellen agreed. “It’s what happens when rich people throw money at problems and expect results. At any cost.”

“We didn’t know it was going to go as badly as it did.”

“I know.”

“Arkham’s always been a mess. We really did want to reform it into something good. Something productive.”

“I mean, it was productive,” said Ellen, her voice sharp. “Lobotomizing addicts did help them kick the habit, it just also had the unfortunate side effect of, well, I mean, lobotomizing them.”

There was a short silence. Damian asked, “Is she alright?”

“Kind of,” answered Ellen shortly. “She’ll be in assisted living for the rest of her life.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. Probably not even your fault. She OD’d a couple times before, so she wasn’t in great shape to begin with.”

“This can’t be an easy case for you.”

“Why?” she asked, looking at him. “Because it has to do with drugs?” He returned her gaze, then gave a little shrug.

“If I couldn’t handle an overdose now and then, Batman wouldn’t have given me the mask.”

“Why did he?”

Ellen leaned forward slightly, setting aside her food and holding the blank scarlet mask in her hands. She shook her head. “When you figure that out,” she said wryly, glancing at him, “let me know?”

When they finished their food and headed back to Damian’s motorcycle, Ellen nudged him again. “Hey,” she said. “Thanks for not asking.”

He didn’t know what she meant. “Not asking what?”

She gestured across her face, at the diagonal scar there. “If this was what she was in for.”

Damian had of course assumed this, but he had been pointedly trying to ignore the scar at all costs since he met Ellen, so he’d avoided saying it outright. For some reason the scar across her face reminded him of his own hidden scar down the length of his back. How he got that was a sensitive story, and he didn’t imagine Ellen’s was any less sensitive.

He took her back into the city, and they parted ways for patrol.

---

NAME: Ellen Nayar ALIAS: Ember DATE OF BIRTH: 26 August 1993 BLOOD TYPE: A+ (Relevant Medical History) EMERGENCY CONTACT: Kiran Kaur Nayar, Grandmother AFFILIATIONS: Green Arrow II (Former), Team Ember EVAL: Mastery of basic defensive techniques at a young age provides a solid foundation for future training. Has a tendency to fall back on defense when cornered, relying on tools to compensate. Capable of much more but struggling to balance training as well as other civilian commitments; requires more investment both in and out of uniform. Significant pain tolerance. Easily identifiable due to the scar and also hair/body type, any uniform designs must compensate.

Strong field skills, hand-to-hand improving and introduction of nonlethal weapons going well. An apparent preference for the staff though she lacks martial arts training in that area. Sharp mind and eye for puzzles. Potential for leadership role assuming increased confidence in her abilities. Imperative to firm up her loyalties or risk alienation. Family history of addiction.

NOTES: |Robin| Hand to hand is fine but she needs to work on weapons and tech. Uniform needs an upgrade, face mask restricts breathing |Red Hood| She smokes

---

“I have good news,” said Oracle, on the screen, “and bad news.”

“Good news first,” said Nell, at the same time Damian said, “What’s the bad news?”

They looked at each other, and then Damian gestured for Nell to continue. She beamed at him and asked, “Good news?”

“We got a lead on our guy,” said Oracle, a big globular green head taking up the screen in lieu of her real face. “The one who reverse-engineered the diaxamene.”

Ellen sat up a little straighter, alert. “I thought he was in some mental facility somewhere.”

“Yeah,” continued Oracle. “That’s the bad news. I, uh – had a friend in Chicago drop by to see him.”

“Oh?” interrupted Damian, with a tone that sounded unlike him. It was half intrigued, half snide. “Interesting. What kind of friend?”

“Just a friend,” she said snippily.

Damian just made a face, but didn’t protest. Ellen glanced at him, wondering what that was about. “What’d he have to say?”

“That’s just it,” Oracle told them. “It wasn’t our guy, just some decoy checked in under his name.”

“A decoy?” asked Niloufar, a frown on her face. “For how long?”

“Presumably since he checked in,” said Oracle darkly. “Which means James has been out this entire time, no doubt plotting his next step for years.”

At the name, Damian lifted his head slightly, as if surprised she would use it. He leaned against the wall of the Bunker, a little away from the others, his arms crossed over his chest. “James?” asked Colin. “Is that his name?”

“Yeah,” sighed Oracle. “OK, confession time, you guys.” The green icon which represented Oracle disappeared from the screen, replaced with blackness and then suddenly a crystal clear image, as if a window to another room. An older woman with ginger hair and glasses on sat before them, computer glare lighting her up.

She waved at them. “Some of you have met me,” she said, “but I guess it’s time to make this official. My name’s Barbara, but I’m still O in the field, OK?”

Nell and Niloufar looked a little starstruck; even Colin seemed impressed. “OK,” said Jordan, glancing with what may have been a tinge of jealousy over at Niloufar. “What does that have to do with our case?”

With a look that was tight and worried, almost apologetic, Babs continued, “The guy we’re looking for – his name is James Gordon, Jr. His dad is Commissioner Jim Gordon of the GCPD.”

Everyone’s eyebrows raised in surprise, except for Damian. He watched as Jordan asked, “Gordon? The cop?”

“Commissioner,” Damian corrected, echoing Babs.

“Didn’t he retire?” asked Ellen, glancing around at Damian, who shook his head.

“He was on leave a few years ago, that’s all.”

“Yeah,” continued Barbara, nodding. “He took some time off after what happened with James the first time. I mean,” she paused, adding, “first is relative, but – anyway. Here’s where it gets personal. Jim Gordon is my dad.”

In a little bit of awe, Nell asked, “So this guy is your brother?”

Making a face, Babs said, “Kind of.”

“Kind of?” echoed Jordan derisively. “How can it be kind of-?”

Abruptly, Damian noticed Niloufar; she kept glancing in between him and the screen suspiciously, as if she was just putting something together. “What?” he barked at her.

Again, her gaze flickered in between him and Barbara. “You’re Robin,” she said, then pointed at the screen, “she’s Oracle. Aren’t you two…?” she trailed off. “Does that mean Commission Gordon is your…dad…too?”

Damian just stared at her for a moment, arms still crossed over his chest. Then he pointed at the screen, and asked doubtfully, “Do I look like I’m related to her?”

“You could have different moms,” offered Nell helpfully.

Rolling her eyes, Jordan said, “Come on, Nilou, everybody knows Robin’s dad is-”

Both Damian and Babs said, “Jabberwock,” and even Ellen added a scolding, “Jordan.”

At these reprimands, she threw her hands up in surrender. “Nevermind.”

“OK, so,” said Nell, turning back to the computer screen. “If we’re pretty sure it’s this James guy, then we at least know where to start, right? When was the last time time he was in Gotham, and did he have any favorite haunts? We can start there.”

A little taken aback by Nell’s sudden professionalism, Damian snapped his gaze away from her and back to Babs. “Spoiler is right,” he said. “We’ll dig into all the leads we have on James Gordon Jr.”

“This is the guy who poisoned the baby formula, right?” asked Ellen doubtfully, glancing around at the group of them. Returning her gaze to Babs on the screen, she added, “Of course you know more about him than I do, Oracle, but somehow that kind of crazy complicated scheme just doesn’t seem to fit the M.O. here. Why would he downgrade to selling to rich kids?”

“Actually,” piped up Niloufar, “we went through a couple overdose cases in the city over the past few months and came up with three positive reports for the same Joker Venom-diaxamene hybrid that was found in Joseph Fremont’s body.”

“We?” echoed Damian sharply, watching her.

Instead of shrinking under his gaze, as Damian had expected, Niloufar turned to look directly at him, straightening up slightly. “Me and Jor- Jabberwock.”

Damian watched her for a moment, then his eyes flickered over to Jordan, who nodded.

“So it’s not just Brentwood,” said Ellen.

“But it’s still a valid point,” said Babs, tapping her chin thoughtfully. “James is more psychological than that. I don’t really see him getting off on handing out drugs like some kind of common pusher.”

“You think he’s working with someone,” said Damian.

It was Colin who spoke up then, from where he was leaning against one of the specimen analysis tables. “The Dealer,” he said earnestly. They all paused and looked around at him, and he returned their gazes, nodding slightly. “It’s gotta be this Dealer guy,” he continued, “the one who’s been selling to the older kids at Brentwood? That’s his partner.”

Babs considered this, twisting her lips thoughtfully. “That would make sense,” she admitted. “James can’t exactly hang around the schoolyard, but he could manipulate someone younger into working for him. He manufactures, the Dealer distributes.”

“Then that makes things a lot easier,” said Nell. “If this Dealer guy’s younger, then he’s more inexperienced, which means he’s more likely to slip up.”

“Exactly,” said Babs, nodding. “I think the important part now is to split up-”

Behind everyone, Damian cleared his throat loudly.

When the others looked around, he seemed a little apologetic. But on the screen, Babs hesitated for a moment before letting out a short sigh. “It’s your team’s case,” she admitted. “This is really important, you guys. Batman’s really taking a leap of faith by trusting you with this one.”

“They’ve earned it,” said Damian, in protest.

“Yeah, but.” Babs shrugged, her empty hands turned upwards. “This is Batman we’re talking about. It took him about ten years to even start trusting me.”

“Well,” said Jordan shortly, shooting a slightly too-friendly grin up at Babs, “all that means is that Batman’s one stupid motherfucker.” “OK,” said Damian loudly, moving forwardly to the computer. “Thank you, Oracle. Send anything you’ve got our way, we’ll get ahead on this.”

Before she said anything else, something else seemed to occur to Oracle, and she said, “Oh, one more thing. Which one of you keeps saving your math homework to the encrypted file database?”

There was a beat of pause as Damian turned to glance around at his team. Nell was staring up at the screen with her mouth in a little ‘o’ shape; Ellen nudged her. “That – might be me,” she squeaked, obviously humiliated. “I’m sorry! Robin said we could use the computers he gave us for homework!”

Damian tried not to roll his eyes as Babs explained, “You absolutely can, but you don’t need to put it in the encrypted file drive. Just leave it on your desktop or something so it doesn’t get uploaded to our databases.”

Mortified, Nell nodded. “Sorry,” she said, again.

“It’s fine,” Babs told her. “Anyway, I’m here if you guys need anything. Keep me updated.”

“We will,” promised Damian, and then the screen before them went blank. In the white glow of the Bunker, he turned around to face them all. “Jabberwock, Abuse, Spoiler,” he began, with no hesitation, “you three need to fan out, comb the city for James Gordon Jr. He’s got to be hiding somewhere. Take a look at the information Oracle sent, and then head out. This is our top priority for the time being. Ember,” he added, turning to her, “you’re with me.”

Snidely, Jordan muttered, “Wow, what a surprise.”

Glancing at her then back at Ember, he explained, “We need to figure out who this Dealer person is. If he’s dealing in Gotham, then it can’t hurt to check in with Red Hood.”

Already, Ellen was shaking her head. “Hood doesn’t let his people deal to kids,” she told Damian. “If the Dealer’s been selling to Brentwood students-”

“Based on Seraph’s intel, he’s been dealing on the streets as well. Anyway, I’m not saying Red Hood will know who the Dealer is, just that he may be able to point us in the direction of any suspicious activity lately.”

Ellen considered this, then nodded. “Is he in town?”

Damian nodded. Earlier that week the entire family had gathered to celebrate the final night of Hanukkah; Bruce wasn’t particularly religious, but as he grew older he started to take every opportunity he could to gather everyone under one roof. This had been the first Hanukkah celebration at the Manor Jason had attended since before his death. He had spent most of the night messing around with Damian and Cass, more or less refusing to talk to Bruce directly. All things considered, it went well.

Anyway, Damian knew that Jason was still in Gotham because he’d been in a group chat with him, Cass, and Stephanie since. Steph, offended that she hadn’t been invited, had been alternatively demanding all the details and simultaneously assuring them she wouldn’t even have gone anyway.

Instructing the others to review Oracle’s information then spread out across the city, he made contact with Jason before riding out into the dark streets with Ellen on his motorcycle behind him. “Hey,” she said, her commlink transmitting her voice clearly into Damian’s ear despite the rushing wind, “what’s your deal with Red Hood?” He didn’t answer right away. “What do you mean?”

“He’s, like. One of you guys, right?”

“Oh,” said Damian, taking a sharp right turn that nearly scraped the side of their legs against the street. He had thought she was speaking emotionally, as if she could detect faint strains of annoyance he thought he’d gotten past. But Ellen knew his identity and that of his father, so he wasn’t shy about admitting relation. “He’s my brother,” he told her, his voice a whisper in her ear. They entered the old block of Midtown, edging into Red Hood territory. “Adopted brother, actually, not that it really matters.”

Ellen knew vaguely of Damian Wayne’s adopted brother, but she hadn’t realized he and Red Hood were one and the same. “Damn,” she said. “The papers would have a field day if they realized the founder of Neon Knights was a drug lord on the side.”

This took Damian by surprise; he glanced back at her, confused, and then realization dawned on his face. With a laugh, he slowed the motorcycle, drawing close to their destination. “No, not that brother. Red Hood is older than him.”

After a beat of hesitation, Ellen asked, “I thought the other guy was Nightwing?”

“He is,” sighed Damian, pulling the motorcycle to a stop in a tight alleyway. Getting off, he explained, “Not very many people know this, but I actually have four siblings. Three brothers and a sister.”

“Oh, shit,” said Ellen, impressed. She too got up, slipping off the bike. “And I thought you were an only child.”

“In fairness,” he said, shooting a grin her way, “I do act like one sometimes.”

There was a loud thump before them, and a red helmet shone in the darkness as Jason Todd descended from the fire escape above. “Sometimes?” he echoed, teasing. “More like all the damn time.” He jerked his thumb at Damian and to Ellen, he said, “Kid’s insufferable.”

While Ellen gave Jason an uncertain smile, Damian got straight to business. “You heard about our case?” he asked, his voice low.

Jay gave a shrug, shaking his head slightly. “Rumors, mostly. I heard some evil assclown is selling Joker Venom pills to kids.”

Damian nodded. “We’ve pursuing all the leads we’ve got, but we’re trying to pinpoint a distributor. What do you know?”

“Nothing, really,” admitted Jay. “Nobody on my payroll goes anywhere near kids, definitely not all the way out to the suburbs. Besides, I have kind of a,” he paused, and though Ellen could not see his face behind the helmet, she imagined she could hear him smiling, “thing when it comes to the Joker, so most of my people know not to touch that shit with a ten-foot pole. Sorry,” he said, and he sounded genuinely apologetic. “Wish I could help more.”

“It’s fine,” murmured Damian thoughtfully, taking this in. “Have you caught anyone selling to kids lately? Maybe this is someone you dismissed?”

But Jason was already shaking his head. “Nope,” he said. “My reputation is pretty well-known by now, Robin. People don’t usually try and test me.”

Glancing in between the two heroes, Ellen moved slightly forward. “Is there anyone who left your operation lately, maybe for unrelated reasons? I don’t think a street pusher goes straight to working for a supervillain, if you know what I mean – it’d make sense if our guy had some exposure to you and yours before he ever made it to where he is now.”

Jason considered this for a moment.

And then he let out a very small groan. Though the helmet obscured his expression, Damian’s pulse quickened, sensing and impending revelation. “Yeah,” said Jay, nodding ruefully. “Now that you mention it, yeah. There was this one kid – I didn’t exactly, like, kick him out, ‘cause he never really did anything wrong, but he was just…” he paused for a moment, as if searching for the word, “…creepy. Not like, in a big-bad-supervillain anyway, but he was just kind of a creep. A lot of the women who worked around him had…complaints. He never did anything,” he added mildly, “but they just got weird vibes from him. Women’s intuition, huh?” Ellen heard the grin in his voice, and imagined he may even have winked her direction.

“Anything else?” she asked.

“Yeah,” answered Jay, his voice turning serious once more. “This guy – his name’s Scott Morrison, he’s maybe your age, Ember. But I caught him following me around on patrol a few times. Not following,” he continued, qualifying himself, “but – showing up in suspicious places. Like he memorized my route, which is weird enough, but then he’d start asking if I ran into any of the Big Bads. He asked me about Joker maybe once before I put my fist through his front teeth.”

Disappointed, there was a reprimand in his voice when Damian began, “Hood-”

But Jay just laughed and held up his hands. “Wasn’t that bad, li’l wing, just scared him a little. Anyway, haven’t seen him since then.” Damian nodded, but before he could say anything Jay added, “OH! I almost forgot – there was this one time, super fuckin’ weird, I kind of tuned it out.”

At this, Damian and Ellen exchanged looks. “What happened?” she asked.

“OK,” he began, leaning in slightly and lowering his voice. “Now this is super weird, and don’t tell your old man, Robin, ‘cause it’s the kind of thing he’d whoop any of our asses for – but one time, I got, you know,” he mimed gunshots with both hands, “beat up, a little, and I was bleeding all over the place try’na find somewhere to hang out and lick my wounds, and I swear to you this guy – I caught him, like, on his hands and knees on the ground following me with a fucking sponge in his hands.”

Both Damian and Ellen stared at him. “A sponge?” Ellen echoed, with a hint of disbelief.

“Yeah,” said Jay, nodding his head. “A fucking sponge. Blood is literally dripping off of my body, and he’s on the ground sponging it up. It was like, the weirdest thing I’ve ever seen.”

More heatedly than Ellen really thought was necessary, Damian demanded, “And you just let him take it? Why didn’t you tell Batman about this?”

“Because,” answered Jay, rolling his head in a way that suggested he was also rolling his eyes, “no motherfucker’s dumb enough to try and clone me. You and your dad-” he broke off, glancing at Ellen, then corrected, “-I mean, the Big Man, sure, but me? Nobody gives a shit.”

“It’s protocol,” said Damian stubbornly, but Jason shook his head.

“Believe me, this guy wasn’t smart enough for anything like that. He was just fucking creepy.”

There was a suspicious pause, and then Damian asked, “When did this happen?”

“Like, maybe a month ago? But he quit working for me before that, maybe half a year or so.”

Ellen glanced at Damian. “That fits,” she murmured. “Our first recorded overdose was almost four months ago. That leaves time for recruiting and initial distribution.”

“Right,” said Damian, with a nod. The expression on his face was still severe. “Hood, we’ll need all the info you can get us on this Scott Morrison character.”

“He used to have a place over in Midtown,” Jay said. “I think it was a motel or something, nothing permanent. Riverview, or something?”

“Riverview,” repeated Ellen, with an urgent look towards Damian. “That was on Oracle’s list.”

With a nod, Damian touched the commlink at his ear. “Thanks,” he said to Red Hood, and then into his comm he said, “Spoiler, come in.”

Returning to Damian’s bike, they headed back through the city. By the time they reached Riverview Boarding House, Spoiler was waiting for them in Room 7. “I talked to the owner,” she said, as Ellen and Damian entered the room. “Somebody’s kept up-to-date on payments, but he hasn’t seen anybody come in or out for a couple weeks now.”

“Probably since we started investigating,” said Ellen, as Damian moved forward to search the room. “He knew we were on to him and wasn’t about to get caught with his pants down.”

“Robin,” said Nell, watching him search the walls for hidden compartments. He glanced around at her, and she jerked her head towards a door in the wall. “The closet.”

For a moment he did not move, only stared at her. And then he turned to the rickety wooden door, and he opened it.

Peering in behind him, Ellen made a face. “Gross,” she said.

Damian said nothing, taking in the sight before them: a veritable shrine to the Joker, littered with newspaper clippings and amateur art and low-res photos printed from the internet. In the center, there was a small Robin action figure, the kind of thing sold at tourist traps in Gotham. The plastic Robin’s limbs and his head were all removed from his body.

Gravely, Damian said, “He’s a Joker fan.”

“That explains why he’s working with JGJ,” offered Nell, from behind them. When both Ellen and Damian glanced back at her, she clarified, “Uh, James-Gordon-Junior. He needed a snappier name.”

Looking back at Damian, Ellen said thoughtfully, “It does explain the connection. Gordon used the lure of Joker Venom to recruit Morrison as his Dealer.”

Still staring at the shrine, Damian’s brown skin had gone wan with disgust, and his lips were pressed tightly together. “I don’t understand these people,” he said lowly, then he stood up, getting to his feet. “The Joker is responsible for the deaths of hundreds, if not thousands of people. He’s a criminal. He’s not funny, he’s not interesting, and I don’t understand people who find him compelling.”

“Yeah,” agreed Nell sympathetically. “I mean, the guy’s basically a terrorist.”

Ellen caught the brief flicker of emotion across Damian’s face, a momentary tell that betrayed how much Damian disliked that word. Still; Ellen didn’t think Nell was wrong. “This is good, though,” said Ellen, to Damian. “It means we can bait him.”

Damian paused, then, very slowly, he turned around to look at Ellen.

----

�� “No,” said Bruce, shaking his head.

“It’s an hour, tops,” Damian insisted, leaning against the computer’s control panel in the Cave. “The entire team will be on top of him the whole time. It’ll be fine.”

“No,” repeated Bruce, shaking his head. “You are not removing the Joker from Arkham custody for any amount of time. He is in solitary confinement for a reason, he’s too dangerous-”

“A hour,” Damian repeated, practically begging his father. “Tightly contained and surveilled. It’s the easiest way to smoke out the Dealer.”

“The easiest is not always the wisest,” said Bruce shortly, “and I will not permit you to play games with a dangerous criminal. He always has a plan, and he’s bested you before.”

“But the entire team-”

“My answer is final,” Bruce told his son. “Harleen is out on parole, perhaps she may be of some help.”

As if disgusted by this suggestion, Damian began, “I’m not retraumatizing Doctor Quinzel on the off chance that she completes Scott Morrison’s Joker fantasy. Most Joker-philes like him think she’s a meaningless distraction anyway.”

“I’m afraid I cannot allow the alternative, Damian. It’s too dangerous.”

“We’re so close.”

“Then find another way.” Bruce’s voice was not unkind as he said, “I believe in you, and I believe in your team. But this mission has already exposed you and Ember to that monster enough. It isn’t going to happen again.”

For a moment, there was silence in the cave except for the constant whirr of machinery and the far-off drip of slowly-forming stalactites. There was a profound tension between father and son, thick enough to slice; Damian was once more angry that his father was blocking the team’s ventures, and yet Bruce would not budge. There was no compromise here.

On the specimen analysis table, unceremoniously contained in a plastic box, the crowbar remained. Bruce had not been sure what to do it, and so as he ran his tests he had kept it there in full view for all to see. Mercifully, Jason had not ventured into the Cave the last time he was here.

A part of Damian wanted to tell Bruce about Scott Morrison, known Joker fanboy, on his hands and knees, sponging up blood. He wanted to tell him that he’d dug up records that someone fitting Scott Morrison had made a clandestine visit to the Joker’s cell in Arkham, presumably leaving him with a gift. He wanted his father to know that the crowbar was a complete plant, and if the crust of bloodstains on its curved end matched Jason Todd’s, it wasn’t because this was the weapon that had been used to kill him.

But Damian was still a sixteen year old, and he was still petty. Perhaps Bruce was being especially strict because of this painful reminder of his own failure at the Joker’s hands, but Damian was just spiteful enough to keep this small knowledge from his father anyway, let him simmer in his own guilt and shame.

“Fine,” Damian said curtly. “Then any further deaths due to this Dealer character are on your conscience, Father.”

Later, he updated Ellen on the situation via commlink while on patrol. She sounded somber. “So that’s it, then?” she sighed. “That plan is out.”

“Hm? Oh, no,” said Damian, leaping from one rooftop to another, his boots absorbing most of the shock of impact. “We’re still going to do it. We just need to keep it a secret from Batman.”

“What?”

He fiddled at his commlink. “Ember, can you hear me? I said we need to keep it as secret from Batman.”

“No, I heard you, I just – that’s impossible.”

“Not impossible,” he corrected, “merely difficult for the inexperienced. Luckily you have me, and I happen to be extremely adept at keeping secrets from Batman. You have to learn that kind of thing,” he told her, offhandedly, “when you live in a house with him.”

“Breaking the Joker out of Arkham is a little different than sneaking out to meet your girlfriend, Robin.”

Without hesitation, Damian said coolly, “That’s not what I meant.” It had been, actually, almost exactly what he meant. “All I’m saying is that I know him well enough to anticipate where he’ll be watching. We do this quickly and effectively, and it’ll be over before he knows it.”

“That’s…optimistic.”

“I have been told I have a very glass-half-full demeanor, yes.”

Ellen laughed, and despite himself Damian caught himself grinning. “If you say so. When’s it going down?”

Good question. Damian considered this, standing above a stone gargoyle, scanning the cold city streets below him. “The longer we wait, the more drugs the Dealer gets out on the streets.”

“Fair enough. What’s the plan?”

“Meet the others at the Bunker. I’ll explain everything there.”

When all was said and done, it did take a little more time than Damian had anticipated. The first phase was dependent on the speed and inertia of rumor, which was spread both throughout Brentwood via Colin and Niloufar and throughout the rest of drug-dealing Gotham by Jason and a select few on his payroll. The rumor spoke of an anniversary: the birth of the Joker, or the rebirth, rather, when a man was swallowed by acid and spat back out as something else. It was a trap, designed to target the biggest Joker fanboy who frequented those circles, who, of course, naturally knew the apocryphal location of that fateful warehouse.

All they needed was one night. It had to work perfectly, smooth as silk, precise as clockwork; but Damian had faith in his team. Well. Ember’s team.

Ellen herself was stationed at the warehouse, staking it out. Colin and Nell were off on the other side of the city, waiting for their cue; Niloufar was spearheading operations out of the Bunker, and Jordan was with Damian, her speed, strength, and flight, a necessary part of his plan.

Hidden inside the bowels of Arkham Asylum, Jordan hovering slightly above him, Damian watched the seconds tick by on his mask’s lens display. For a minute or so, there was nothing but tense silence.

And then Damian touched the commlink at his ear. “Abuse, Spoiler,” he said, “you’re good to go. Seraph, how are we on security?” “All disabled and looped,” came Niloufar’s voice, without hesitation.

“Perfect,” he replied. “Ember, Jabberwock’s on her way.” He nodded towards Jordan, then took the lead, expertly navigating through the high-ceilinged halls of Arkham, avoiding guards.

In his cell, the Joker was still singing. “Little Bunny Foo-Foo, hoppin’ through the forest…”

Disabling the door’s security, Damian gestured for Jordan to take over. “Go.”

She did so, wrapping her arms roughly underneath the Joker’s shoulders and heaving him up and out, shooting back the way she and Damian came, disappearing into the night. The Joker’s fading laughter echoed in Damian’s ears as he locked and secured the door once more, then slipped away, hoping no one would notice Joker’s sudden silence.

As Damian headed back out to where his motorbike was stowed, he checked the open channel; the shit had, to put it delicately, apparently hit the fan, and Batman was barking orders at other Gotham heroes following an incident on the other side of the city, which meant he was far away from Arkham and from the docks where their plan was about to go down.

It took him almost twenty minutes to make it to the warehouse. Leaving his bike some ways away, as he approached the empty, abandoned building he was certain he could hear that faint, familiar laughter. Their trap was lain.

He found Ellen and Jordan in the rafters, high above the walkways which crisscrossed above vats which were now mostly empty. Jordan had dropped the Joker in one which had a foot or two of (probably?) nontoxic sludge at the bottom, and his laughter was so manic and so loud that its reverberations started to hurt Damian’s ears. He activated the dampeners in his commlink, relying on his teammates’ comms to hear them.

“Nice work,” he told them both. “Abuse and Spoiler gave us an hour, tops. After that Batman resumes his normal patrol around the city, but we caught him as far away as we could, so it should be at least another hour after that before he realizes there’s anything amiss.”

Though Ellen’s face was obscured, the sound of her voice betrayed her concern. “So Morrison better show up in the next two hours.”

“He will,” said Damian, watching the dark and empty walkways below them. “He won’t be able to resist the lure of legend, and there’s no way he’ll stay away once he hears that.”

“No kidding,” muttered Jordan, following his gaze.

“That’s still leaving an awful lot to chance,” Ellen added, sounding uncertain. “The timeline seems kind of arbitrary, and I’m still not completely sure why we needed the Joker himself for this anyway? Seems to me we could’ve just used, I don’t know, a recording of his voice or something-”

“Ember, please,” said Damian shortly, waving away her concerns. “I know what I’m doing.”

“Yeah, OK,” she replied, maybe a little insulted. “I don’t doubt that, Robin, but I’m pretty sure Batman said that this isn’t your team, it’s mine, and part of me is starting to think the only reason you wanted to go get Joker in the first place was because your dad told you not to-”

But before Ellen could continue or Damian, suddenly livid, could open his mouth to defend himself, Niloufar’s voice echoed in all of their ears. “Someone’s approaching the warehouse,” she told them, via commlink. “Good luck, you guys.”

They didn’t reply, because at that moment they heard the big sheet metal door to the warehouse creak open. All at once, the Joker’s laughter suddenly stopped.

Scott Morrison was not at all what Damian had been expecting. He was somewhere in his twenties, tall, slim, good-looking. His blond hair was gathered into a topknot, and he wore wide-brimmed glasses which appeared to have no magnifying effect on his eyes, and so therefore were probably only worn for the aesthetic appeal. Both he and Ellen shifted uncomfortably at the same time, perhaps coming to the simultaneous conclusion of, Oh no, he’s hot.

“Hello?” he called into the vast warehouse, which Damian thought was a pretty stupid move. He went to the stairs which led to the walkways above the giant but now-empty vats, climbing them slowly, cautiously, peering around. “Joker? Mister J?” he called, which caused Damian to cringe slightly and Jordan to whisper, “Yikes.”

Morrison continued, making his way across steel catwalk, his hands on the railing on either side. “I heard you laughing,” he called. “Are you here? Joker?”

A low, sickly chuckle emanated from one of the vats. Morrison’s eyes went wide behind his fake glasses, and he darted across the walkway, leaning over the railing.

The Joker leered up at him. His voice was low and frightening, like a purr in the back of his throat. “Who’s asking?”

“Oh, shit,” said Morrison, in obvious excitement. “Holy fuck, OK, oh my God, Mister Joker, woah. Hold on,” he said.

Morrison dug into his pocket, and Jordan muttered, “Oh, Christ,” as he took out a phone and literally posed for a selfie.

“Oh my God, Mister Joker, big fan,” said Morrison, once he’d taken the picture. “Like, holy shit, I can’t believe this is actually happening-”

Ellen gently nudged Jordan. “Go,” she whispered, but then Damian held out his arm.

“Wait,” he said.

In disbelief, Ellen blinked at him. “We have him,” she whispered angrily at him, “he’s right there, if we don’t move now then the Joker could tip him off to this whole operation-”

But Damian was already shaking his head. “Wait,” he said again.

This infuriated Ellen. Jordan just gave her an apologetic look and a shrug. Knowing Robin was the most experienced vigilante between the three of them, she forced herself into silence.

In the vat, up to mid-calf in a thick yellowy-gray sludge, the Joker just stared up at Morrison, unimpressed. “Big fan, huh?” he echoed. “What era?”

Morrison stared down at him. “Uh, what was that?”

“What era?” repeated the Joker, sounding as petulant as a child. “Nicholson, Ledger, Leto? Who was your favorite?”

“Um,” said Morrison uncertainly, “uh, no, sir, I think you misunderstand me, I’m just saying that like, you know, out of Batman’s whole rogues gallery, out of, you know, out of everything in Gotham that makes up the soul of this place – I mean, you’re it, man! Your presence is stamped into the very fabric of Gotham City! You’re everything!”

There was a silence. The Joker stared up at him. “Not very funny, are you?” he asked, his lip jutting out in a pout.

“What – I mean, no one’s as funny as the Clown Prince of Crime! But, like, I do have some stand-up material, if you like, want to hear?” He paused anxiously, then began, “OK, so, like, here’s one – why does Batman’s sidekick keep getting younger and younger?”

Sounding bored, the Joker drawled, “’Cause the older ones keep dying.”

“No,” said Morrison, “but – that’s funny too. No, it’s ‘cause – ‘cause he’s Robin the cradle. Get it? Like robbing?”

There was a long, tense silence. And then the Joker let out a chuckle. “Hey, kid,” he called up, “that is pretty funny.”

Beside her, Ellen could feel Damian tense, his entire body coiled tightly. He was aching to jump into action, she could tell. She didn’t entirely understand why he hadn’t already.

“Hey, kid!” Joker called once more. “Why don’t you come on down here, and tell me a couple more of those funny jokes you got there?”

A flash of uncertainty crossed Morrison’s face. “Oh, I – I don’t know-”

“Aw, come on,” said the Joker, kicking around at the sludge under his feet. “Hey, wanna hear another one? What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile?”

Jordan leaned over and whispered, “I know this one!”

“Get in the car, Robin,” said Joker, and then he wheezed with laughter, breathless in his own hilarity. A grin spread across Morrison’s face. Once more he dug into his pocket for something, then pulled out a plastic baggie full of pills. He snagged three or four out of the bag, and stuffed them into his mouth, swallowing them down.

Then he climbed up on the railing, and he jumped down into the vat below.

He hit the bottom with a sickening crunch, and let out a yelp of pain. “Got him,” muttered Damian, but once more he stopped Jordan from moving. “Wait.”

The Joker stalked towards Morrison, who misinterpreted this as intent to help him up. “No!” he barked. “No, no, no! This is good! Pain is good, it’s freeing, like chaos of the mind!” He let out a loud, manicured laugh, as if it were something he practiced in the mirror. “See, Joker, man, I get it! I get you, the big joke behind everything, the ultimate gag! Laugh in the face of an indifferent universe! It doesn’t matter anyway, so why not try to burn as many bridges as you can on your way out, right? We all die in the end!”

“That’s not very funny,” said the Joker.

“It’s all funny!” insisted Morrison, as the Joker slowly neared him, like a shark stalking his prey. “That’s the point! It isn’t real! It doesn’t matter! That’s what makes the joke so damn funny-”

The Joker grabbed Morrison’s topknot; his wide grin, usually so gleeful, was downturned into a comical frown. Though the slimy sludge at the bottom of the vat was only about a foot high, he shoved his face into it, sticking a knee on Morrison’s back to keep him down. Morrison started to struggle wildly, his shouts unintelligible as the ugly goo slipped into his mouth and nose.

“It’s like babies in bathwater,” the Joker said, cocking his head, watching Morrison struggle. “Never understood it! You leave the kiddies alone for two minutes and suddenly they’re floatin’ on their bellies like a bunch of goldfish. How do they drown in that!” He let out a guffawing, belly-deep laugh, which sent a chill down Ellen’s spine. Pushing Morrison’s face deeper into the sludge beneath him, he roared, “It’s not that deep!”

At that, Ellen disregarded her orders and moved. She leapt onto the steel walkway, sprinted down towards the vat, and jumped in, her feet landing squarely on Joker’s shoulders, knocking him off his feet. As Morrison lifted his face and gasped for breath, the Joker turned around to see her, and his face lit up. He laughed maniacally, gleeful.

“Look who’s back!” he screeched. “How nice! How soon! Tell me, how’s Mama?”

Ellen drew her fist back to throw a punch, but in a split second, the Joker had disappeared; she glanced up to see Jordan spiriting him away, presumably back to his cold cell in Arkham. There was a squelching thump behind her, and she turned around to see Robin glaring at her. As Morrison coughed, Damian said, “I had it under control.”

Pointing towards the pathetic figure on his hands and knees, Ellen said, “Joker was going to kill him.”

“He was going to scare him,” replied Damian pointedly. “Nothing like a healthy dose of trauma to cure you off your obsession with a criminal like the Joker.”

Still wracked with coughs, Morrison’s head swiveled towards Damian, sludge dripping down his face. “S’not a – criminal – he’s an – artist-”

Damian turned around, looking only mildly interested. He kicked at Morrison’s torso with his boot, and the man toppled over. “The eight-year-olds finger-painting at Neon Knight Centers are artists,” he told him. “The Joker’s just a two-bit con man who somehow stumbled into mythologization.”

Gasping for breath, Morrison refused this. “He’s the – beating heart – of Gotham City! He’s Batman’s binary star! He defines the Batman!”

Damian grabbed the man’s collar and swung a leg over his head so his feet stood on either side of him. His gloved fist connected solidly with the front of Morrison’s face. “He’s not that interesting,” Damian said shortly.

“Where would Batman be without the Clown Prince of Crime?”

Again, Damian punched him. “In better mental health than he is right now, that’s for sure.”

“Who would he be? He’s the Batman’s greatest match! His greatest foil! The only other man he’ll ever truly understand!”

His fist connected for a third time with Morrison’s face, and Damian looked over his shoulder to address Ellen. “People use that one a lot,” he said, sounding genuinely perplexed. “It really says something concerning about how people interpret empathy and intimacy in male relationships.”

Once more Morrison attempted that terrible, overly-practiced laugh, and Damian turned around again to hit him in the face again. It was then that Ellen moved forward, placing a hand on Damian’s shoulder. “As satisfying as this may be,” she told him, sympathetically, “we’re here to get information out of him, remember? We need to know about Gordon.”

“Gordon?” echoed Morrison; there was incredulity in his voice, even through the blood running out of his mouth. “J-James Gordon?”

“That’s the one,” said Ellen, turning to him. “Junior, that is. Is he the one who’s been supplying you with the modified diaxamene?”

“Diaxamene?” he repeated, but Ellen was already digging through his pockets for that plastic baggie full of pills, which she quickly found and removed. “I don’t know what the fuck diaxa-what is, that shit’s diluted Joker Venom!”

“Yes, we know,” said Damian shortly, clearly still irritated. “You’re the one they call the Dealer, aren’t you?”

“I – I don’t know, man, James just said to tell people that!”

“James,” said Ellen, seizing hold of this. “He’s your supplier, isn’t he?” His whole body trembling, he tried to nod, but it came out looking more like a seizure. Spittle gathered at the corner of his mouth, and his skin was quickly draining its color, turning pale. Quickly Damian pulled open one eyelid, inspecting his pupils. Tightening his grip on Morrison’s collar, Damian asked, “How many pills have you taken tonight?” Morrison started to shake violently, his eyes rolling back into his head, and through his teeth, Damian snarled, “No!” Removing one hand from Morrison’s collar, Damian flipped open a compartment on his utility belt, popped the cap off a tiny syringe, and plunged it into Morrison’s neck.

“Anti-Venom?” asked Ellen. Damian nodded as Morrison’s shaking subsided, and he grew limp in Damian’s grip. “Robin,” she said, lowering her voice. “You can OD on diaxamene too if you take enough of it. The Anti-Venom may not work.”

“Maybe not,” grunted Damian, “but it’ll give us more time.” He shook Morrison bodily by the collar, and the man’s head lolled on his neck, his eyes blinking out of sync. “Scott Morrison,” he barked, “we know you’re the Dealer, and we know you’re working with James Gordon, Junior. Listen to me. Tell me where he is, and I’ll do my best to save your sorry life. If you have nothing to give me, then I will leave you here, and you will die alone in a warehouse where no one will find your body for weeks, if not months, and you’ll go to your grave knowing that Joker himself thinks you’re not fucking funny. Now,” he said, his voice calm and collected. “Where is James Gordon Junior?”

Something was catching in Morrison’s throat, making it impossible to reply; Ellen had a suspicion that it was vomit, his stomach protesting against all the poison he’d swallowed. Incapable or unwilling to form words, he merely lifted his hands, and he pointed out of the windows which lined the walls, just below the ceiling.

Damian paused, then he twisted around, following the direction of Morrison’s finger. Ellen did as well, but she didn’t understand: all that was visible out of the window was the night sky, stars faded above the lights of the city, and the shooting spire of the tallest building in Gotham City – Wayne Tower.

Grabbing Morrison’s hair, Ellen hissed, “Is this a game to you?” but Damian had already let him go, shooting his grappling hook out onto the walkway above.

He touched the commlink at his ear. “Seraph!” he called wildly. “Seraph, come in!”

Something dropped into Ellen’s stomach as she understood. Following Damian, she sent out a 911 call with Morrison’s location and status, then quickly followed Damian onto his bike. Niloufar had never responded to Damian’s call, and when he tried Jordan, he heard nothing from her either.

As they raced through Gotham, Ellen asked, “You think Gordon knows about the Bunker?”

“Maybe,” murmured Damian. “I know he knows about my family, and he knew about Batman back when we were based out of the Bunker. It’s a tease, Ember, don’t you get it? The diaxamene, the Joker Venom, the dead child so close to the Manor? He’s been playing us this whole time.”

“How?” asked Ellen, confused. “What do you mean?”

The bike shot into the secret entrance to the Bunker, and Damian was off of it immediately, sprinting into the main computer hub. “Seraph!” he called, looking around wildly, but there was no one there. “Seraph!”

Before them, the computer screen glowed a blank white. Something blared on both Damian and Ellen’s comms, Batman sending out an emergency signal for something going down at Arkham. “Jabberwock,” said Ellen to Damian, fear tight in her voice. “Something’s gone wrong-”

For a moment, Damian did nothing. On either side of him, he squeezed his fists tightly, gloves still stained red with Scott Morrison’s blood.

Then he turned to Ellen and said, “We can’t leave. Gordon’s here.”

“Where?”

Damian gestured for her to follow him, then took her through a set of doors she’d never seen open; he peeled his mask off his face, then lowered his eye down to a retina display. It blinked green, and an elevator opened. He held out one hand as if to say to her, After you.

“Where are we going?” she asked, unmoving.

He shrugged, then stepped into the elevator first. “The Penthouse,” he said shortly. “It’s where Nightwing and I lived back when he was Batman. If I’m right, it’s where Gordon’s set up camp.”

In disbelief, she finally boarded the elevator with him. “And how is it possible that none of your fancy security features ever picked up on anything up there?”

“I don’t know,” said Damian shortly, pressing his mask back onto his face. The elevator moved so rapidly with such sudden force that Ellen almost stumbled. “But it’s stupidly obvious – where’s the one place we would never look? Right under our noses, of course.”

Ellen glanced up at the ceiling of the elevator. “Or – above our noses, I guess,” she mumbled.

They emerged in a hallway; Damian jogged to the door and took off his glove, pressing his thumb against a scanner, and then he said aloud, “Voice recognition, Damian Wayne,” and the lock of the door let out a little click.

Lowly, Ellen asked, “If your security’s so tight, how’d he get through?” but Damian ignored her, pressing his gloved hand against the door and pushing.

The Penthouse was dark, but a light was on down the hallway, coming from the kitchen. When Ellen and Damian entered, a voice called, “In here!”

With a wary glance at each other, they followed the source of the voice. Turning the corner into the big modern kitchen, they found James Gordon Jr. sitting at the counter, glasses on his face, a spoon tucked into a pot of yogurt.

“Hi,” he said, waving at them. “Hey, it’s nice to finally meet you, Damian.” To Ellen he said, “I don’t know who you are,” then continued, “Nice digs, huh? Dick could’ve decorated more probably, but personally I like it.”

“Where is Seraph?” asked Damian, his voice flat.

“If you mean the girl downstairs,” James answered, scooping up a spoonful of yogurt, “she left a while ago. Probably to help her friend with the Joker.” Blandly, he looked at Damian. “Really nice of you to break him out and everything for me, Damian. I didn’t even have to lift a finger.”

“You’re done, Gordon,” Damian told him. “Your operation is shut down.”

“What operation?” asked James, looking mildly interested.

“The drugs.”

“I don’t have any drugs,” said James, innocently.

Damian stared at him, his expression stony and unreadable.

“Go ahead, search the place,” James continued. “Not a lot around here except some personal mementos. Sorry for squatting, but, hey, life’s tough when everyone thinks you’re a psychopathic murderer, right, Damian?”

Color dropped out of Damian’s cheeks, then suddenly rushed back in, flushing his brown skin. Sensing they had to take control of this situation, Ellen stepped up. “We’ve got you, Gordon,” she said simply. “We got the Dealer, too. We know what you’ve been putting out on the streets.”

“I haven’t been putting anything on the streets,” James said smoothly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Feeling a surge of anger, she suddenly sympathized with Damian’s fury. “Scott Morrison-”

“-OD’d,” said James flatly. “Right?”

Damian and Ellen exchanged a look. For all they knew, Morrison had died before the paramedics reached him.

“Scott Morrison was a crazy man with a Joker fetish,” James said, with a shrug. He ate a spoonful of yogurt. “Nothing to do with me.”

“The diaxamene-”

For the first time, a hunt of frustration entered his voice. “Any idiot could’ve gotten ahold of that. Haven’t you heard, Miss Nayar? Prescription pills are all the rage nowadays. Oh,” he added, picking up a remote from behind him, pointing it at the television on the wall. “Would you look at that.” A Breaking News broadcast played, informing viewers that a potential catastrophe at Arkham Asylum had narrowly been avoided, and the Joker, who had mysteriously vanished from his cell, was back in custody.

James smiled at Damian and Ellen.

“All according to plan,” he said.

Damian’s eyes were glued to the screen, slightly in shock as the news showed shaky video footage of a slim figure shooting into the sky, holding someone else in their arms. It was obviously Jordan, and it looked like she was carrying Niloufar, who had covered her face with her headscarf against the cameras. Despite himself and the absurdity of the situation, he somehow found himself taken by surprise that they had managed to solve the situation on their own, without his help.

James Gordon Jr. did not fight back. He did not protest; when the police came, they arrested him, but found no evidence of wrongdoings in the Penthouse except, obviously, trespassing. Later, into his commlink, Oracle informed Damian that they were holding her brother temporarily, but they may not have enough solid evidence to put him away.

Meanwhile, Ellen got a quick status report from the other members of the team, then checked on Scott Morrison. He was alive, but comatose.

As the late nighttime hours began to bleed into the impossibly early morning, Damian and Ellen sat on the rooftop of a building, their legs hanging down over the side.

“I know – technically – we won,” said Ellen, peering down at the city streets below them. “So why does it still feel like we got played?”

“It usually feels like that,” Damian told her dully, without looking around at her. “Especially with filth like the Joker and Gordon, Junior. It always feels like there’s something we missed.”

“We didn’t need to take the Joker out of custody.”

“No,” agreed Damian. “I…suppose I just hate it when people think the Joker is bigger than he is. He’s a lowlife criminal. I wanted Morrison to understand that.”

“I think that’s the problem,” said Ellen, glancing around at him. “It…strikes me that you really can’t take these things personally in this business.”

Damian didn’t answer for a moment. Then, slowly, he got to his feet. “I understand that,” he announced, with some finality. “But…I don’t think it’s right to remove your own feelings out of these kinds of situations. I think that’s how you end up like Batman.”

“And that’s a bad thing?”

“It’s the worst thing,” he told her, his gaze flickering over to her. “A terrible option. The bad ending.”

“I don’t know,” she challenged, with a shrug. “He took care of this city for a long time before you came along. Maybe he knows something you don’t.”

This obviously troubled Damian. He bade her farewell, and then he made his way back to Wayne Manor, arriving in the Cave just as the very first edges of dawn began to break. His father was already there, seated in his throne before the computer, as always. Damian noticed the crowbar was gone from its place on the specimen table.

He removed his mask on his way up from the garage, passing his father at the computer and heading in the direction of the stairs that led up to the house above. Before he reached them, though, he paused, and he turned around.

“Father,” he said.

Bruce moved only slightly, glancing over his shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he admitted, like pulling teeth.

For a moment, nothing happened. And then Bruce turned back to the computer, his fingers clacking away on the keyboard. “What are you apologizing for?” he asked. “You won.”

“The Joker-”

“Is back in Arkham.”

“But I-”

“Maybe you made mistakes, Robin,” said Bruce, still facing the screen, “but your team was there for you, and they took care of it. I was impressed with Jabberwock and Seraph in particular tonight. Jabberwock should do very well on patrol, though I believe Seraph would benefit from a more permanent headquarters.” On the screen, Bruce flipped through a series of safehouses he’d long kept on reserve. “The Haven, perhaps?”

Damian gaped at his father. “Headquarters?” he asked. “Patrol? You mean to say – this is it? You really trust them?”

“I trust you,” said Bruce, “and I trust Ember. That’s got to be enough for now.”

Still, Damian felt discontent. “Father,” he began, “I still think – if we had just-”

“Ifs and should haves are poison, Damian,” said Bruce, without looking around. “You won. Red Hood and some of his contents are working on getting Gordon’s drug off the streets, but without a supplier, it should dry up on its own.”

“And Gordon?”

“From what I hear of him, he’s no criminal mastermind. He just likes toying with people. If he can, his father will put him away.”

“His father,” echoed Damian, trying to ignore the obvious parallels suddenly rearing his mind. “I imagine you might be feeling some…empathy, for his situation.”

“None at all, Damian. None at all.”

Damian rolled his eyes, then turned to head up into the Manor, taking the stairs two at a time.

----

NAME: Niloufar Ghorbani ALIAS: N/A / Seraph DATE OF BIRTH: 16 October 1996 BLOOD TYPE: O+ (Full Medical History) EMERGENCY CONTACT: Nazanin & Mahmoud Ghorbani, Parents (Contact) AFFILIATIONS: Team Ember EVAL: Observe for further development of metahuman abilities

#sog2 #earth 28 #damian wayne #colin wilkes #nell little #ellen nayar #bruce wayne #jason makes a cameo!!!!!#also i hated writing the joker #and this fic officially makes jewish!waynes canon #i'll fix some shit in here before i upload it to ao3 but i just had to power thru it and get it Finished #oh babs is also there

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