#anyway who wants to platonically makeout

[transmascxielian]

I LOVE BEING AROMANTIC! I love talking to my friends about stuff they like. I love kissing my friends on the face and telling them I'm in love with them and knowing that it isn't romantic, it's just us. I love knowing myself well enough to know that I don't want romance or a relationship. I love platonic interpretations of media. I love defiance of amatonormativity. I love how my experience could be completely alien to that of another aromantic person because of how personal and multifaceted it can be. I love containing multitudes. I love aromanticism and I love being aro and I love being queer and trans and I love eschewing conventional relationships. I love loving.

[ham1lton]

GOOD LUCK, BABE!

pairings: charles leclerc x reader (romantic/platonic).

summary: friendships don’t always survive, you and charles would know.

warnings: cheating towards the end. no smut but a makeout session. sorry alex 💔

author’s note: the brocedes au that me and anon wanted. i’m trying something new btw. let me know how u feel about it.

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you never imagined yourself in the same room as charles. not willingly anyways. yet, when you received the invitation with his handwritten note asking you to come. you knew you couldn’t say no. you had spent so much of your childhood discussing the future. he wanted a family. three kids, a dog and a gorgeous wife that loved him. you wanted a career. the glory, the accolades and the fans that loved you.

he made you promise one day that you’d be at his wedding. you were fifteen at the ice cream shop that he’d always drag you too. you had snuck out without arthur in order to have an extra scoop after charles’ dad had paid for the ice cream you’d had earlier. he looked over at you, eyes serious and asked you to be his best man — (“best woman, best girl. it doesn’t matter. i just want you next to me. i’m serious yn.” he took a lick of his ice cream and the seriousness melted away when he left a smudge on his nose.)

you didn’t break promises easily.

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however, when arthur came running up to you, asking you to follow him. when your relationship with charles disintegrated, you never lost touch with arthur. he was like a little brother to you. you would very rarely meet him for brunch in whatever city you happened to both be in. so when he asked you to follow him, you did willingly.

“where are we going?” you ask, as he pulls you along by your right hand. “usually, whenever you don’t give me context it means you’re doing something bad. is this something bad leclerc?”

“when am i ever doing something bad?” he looks over his shoulder and gives you a wink. you roll your eyes. he plants you in front of a room and nods at it. you stare at him blankly.

“okay? i’m not a mind reader arthur.”

“i need you to help me look for something.” he nods at the room. “in there.”

“you can do it yourself.” you turn to leave before he runs in front of you and stops you.

“listen. i don’t care if you had that weird breakup with my brother,” you start to protest that it wasn’t a breakup but he stops you. “but you didn’t need to cut me off too. you were a part of my life too. you abandoned me too.”

“i don’t ask you for anything yn but i need your help. i’m looking for my silver cufflinks. i need them.” he raised his cuffs to show you the distinct lack of cufflinks. “please. i’m begging you. i wouldn’t ask otherwise.”

you didn’t expect to come here to be blackmailed and guilt tripped but it was working. you avoided everything leclerc. even his family, especially his family if you were being honest. they went from being your second family to nothing at all.

“okay.” you nod. “i’ll get your cufflinks.”

arthur smiles and opens the door for you to walk in. it’s someone’s hotel room. either arthur’s or a friend’s. it’s messy and you sigh. it’ll be hard finding them in this mess but you start carding through clothes.

“yn?”

you know that voice anywhere. you turn around and it’s charles. he’s half dressed in his wedding suit, his crisp white shirt half unbuttoned. his hair is still messy as if he’s ran his hand through nervously multiple times. you smile with no teeth and move to open the door. it’s locked.

“arthur leclerc! open this fucking door!” you seethe. you bang against the door and hear his voice through the material.

“not until you fucking talk! i’ll be back in half an hour.” you hear his footsteps walk away. you turn to charles who smiles sheepishly at you.

“tea?”

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liked by messyass1, messyass2 and 1,737,883 others.

ham1ltonshaderoom: it seems all the rumours are true. sworn enemies f1 drivers charles leclerc and yn yln have seemed to call a truce to celebrate his wedding to art historian alexandra saint mleux. she was seen wearing a dark green vivienne westwood gown as she celebrated the couple’s nuptials.

what do we think about the rekindling of this flame, ham1ltons?

view all 679,498 comments

user1: CHARLESYN IN THE SAME ROOM NO ARGUING NO FIGHTS WE CHEERED!!

user2: i wish we had pictures of her. she always eats her outfits.

-> user3: wtf how does she digest them?

-> user2: figure of speech babe <3

user4: did she have a date??

-> user5: her longtime boyfriend!!

user6: they worked it out on the remix

-> user7: so FERRARI ❤️

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charles makes you the tea. he doesn’t finish buttoning his shirt as he pours it into a mug for you. he remembered how you liked it - two sugars and a splash of milk. you stay silent but nod gratefully.

it’s been so long since you’ve been alone with him. you’re not the same wide eyed kid but neither is he. he’s getting married and you’re giving him the silent treatment. he sits on the edge of his bed awkwardly. tapping his thigh with a single finger.

“thank you for coming,” he says. “i didn’t think you would.”

“the handwritten invitation was a nice choice,” you sip your tea. “personal. did everyone else like it?”

“only yours was,” he coughs into his elbow. “handwritten, i mean. only yours.”

that’s news to you but you don’t have time to ponder what that means before he speaks again.

“i’ve thought for the longest time on what i’d say to you if i got the chance. everything. how sorry i was, how sorry i am, how much i hated you and how much you meant to me. you were my best friend yn. my best friend. no one has even come close to what you were for me.” he chuckles as he presses his palms into his eyes. “who else could i talk to besides you?”

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(insert a tiktok edit of the two of you throughout your careers. the song playing over it is the song ‘chemtrails over the country club’ by lana del ray specifically the lyrics ‘nobody’s son/nobody’s daughter’. it gets 167k likes.)

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“do you still hate me?” charles looks at you under his lashes.

“of course i do. you hurt me.”

“you hurt me. but i don’t hate you.” charles fidgets in his seat. he stretches his hands to place them on his knees. you sip your tea. “do you remember when i asked you to be my best woman?”

you nod.

“i didn’t mean that. i wanted you to be my wife.”

you would choke on your tea if you didn’t know that information but charles wasn’t subtle. yet it was a case of missed opportunities. you didn’t like him then and he didn’t like you now.

“i couldn’t hate you yn. god knows i tried. it hurts me knowing that you hate me as i could never hate you. i said all that shit because i was hurt and angry. you said i was a shitty driver. that i wouldn’t have won without ferrari’s strategies which we both know are shit-“

“i’m sorry, i didn’t know you still cared about my opinion.” you interrupt. your voice still has a defensive edge to it. he just shrugs.

“i’ll always care about your opinion.”

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CHARLESYNNIES TWITTER GC (est.2017)

user1: editing yn to l’amour de ma vie by billie eilish (extended version) rn 😋

user2: what part?

user1: listen from 2:15 till 2:56!!

user3: THATS GONNA EATT OMGGGG

user4: wish we could edit the wedding appearance of the two of them omggg.

user5: when i get off my lazy ass and finish my edit of them to ‘the girl so confusing’ remix

user6: do y’all think they’re talking at the wedding?

user7: babe do you know yn? she’s probably at the very corner of the reception right now. she’ll take a pic with every other leclerc besides charles and probably leave before dinner is served.

user8: you’re so real. yn would NEVER talk to charles let alone be alone with him. i hate it but it’s the truth.

user9: plus charles is probably busy with the wedding.

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you never considered yourself to be a bad person but making out with your ex best friend/teammate literally a few hours before he’s about to get married? that’s a bitch move.

you try to think about his fiancée. she’s probably getting ready excitedly with her family and friends. thinking about being the future mrs leclerc while you’re two minutes away from committing adultery on both of your partners.

you pull apart from charles. he looks at you with wide eyes.

“we can’t fucking do this. we’re awful people,” you sit up. “my fucking lipgloss is all over your mouth.”

“i look good in pink. it’ll be fine.” he wipes it off.

“you have a fiancée. you’re getting married.”

“tell me the word and i’ll call it off. just for you.” he looks at you. “i’m quitting f1 after this year anyways. i’m not attempting to go for the second championship. i don’t want it.”

“how do you not want it?”

“we have different priorities but i won’t be a f1 driver anymore. you always said you couldn’t date a driver. i’ve grown now. i’m fine being in your shadow. i love it. i want it.”

he looks at you as serious as he did when he asked you to be his best woman all those years ago.

“what do you want yn?”

you bite your lip, and think.

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CHARLESYNNIES TWITTER GC (est.2017)

user7: i’m hoping we get at least a picture. just one.

user4: i would DIE!!! imagine!!!

user3: charlesynnies suffer every day and everyone else wins.

user2: i think yn is right there with charles. maybe dancing.

user1: he always said she’d be at his wedding. he was right. i think there is still love there.

user5: FINISHED MY FUCK ASS EDIT PLEASE LIKE AND COMMENT ON TIKTOK BESTIES

user6: okay i wrote a little fic for ao3. it’s called ‘wait until you like me again’!! it’s domestic charlesyn as they are forced to work everything out. kinda angsty but really smutty.

user1: spamming u both charlesynnies are the best idc <3

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liked by ham1ltonshaderoom, landonorris and 1,827,983 others.

charles_leclerc: say hello to mr and mrs leclerc 💍

tagged: alexandrasaintmleux

view all 287,929 comments

yourusername: happy for you 💕

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INTERVIEW WITH CHARLES LECLERC

interviewer — so is it true? you’re renewing your ferrari contract?

charles (laughing) — it is true. racing is my life. this is it for me. it’d take something big to take me away from it.

interviewer: you all heard it here first!

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— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryy @aliciaablueprint @lennnooshh @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @marshmummy @23victoria @ourlifeforchaos @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @tsireyasgf @landososcar @yongi-lee @maxlarens @velentine @m1892 @blushmimi @evans-dejong @nixisracing @lethalvenus @santanasaintmendes @idontknowlmaoo @sainzluvrr (charles specific tags will be added to the comments!)

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[lafrexniere]

You Deserve an Oscar - OP81 & LN4

Note: Impulsively wrote this last night before bed and realized I was writing this while listening to "You Deserve an Oscar - Matt Maltese" so figured I could fit that phrase in here somewhere and make a cute title. Anyway I really like this one 😁 Summary: Landos best friend since school dating Oscar, but keeps it a secret from Lando because you were not sure how he would react

Warnings: Light details of a makeout session (he is in a mood 😉😏), and stuff is implied but not explicitly stated

"Lando, I'm just going out for a bit it's not a big deal," you said. He was always so protective of you since moving back in together. You had known each other since you were 13, your family had moved from the United States due to your parents' jobs expanding to the UK leaving you an anxiety-ridden teenager in a place with no friends and having an accent that would stand out. It was your first day, a student had been assigned to give you a tour of the school, and there he was, Lando. From that moment on the two of you were inseparable even when he was traveling for races, nothing more than a platonic friendship, you had gone to races as your younger brother had wanted to start karting, but your parents refused. Lando was the cool sibling your brother had wanted, but he was the best friend you had been waiting for, and now here you were arguing over driving your car at night. 

"Be careful, and I want you to text me whenever you get to where you are going," he said pointing his finger.

"You're not gonna ask- you know what never mind, Bye Lan," you grabbed your keys skipping out the door. After you closed it behind you making your way down to your parked car you saw the beam of light from the door light up the sidewalk. 

"Why would I need to ask? You hiding something from me?" His eyes narrowed. 

"Nope, just hanging out at a friend's, bye," you said just before hopping in the car. Oh, it was more than a friend, in fact, his teammate you were going to see, you two had been talking back and forth for about a month and had gone on a few dates, somehow getting past Lando. You both weren't really sure what you were yet, were you boyfriend and girlfriend or friends with benefits which is why you didn't want to let Lando know. You wanted to be more, there were so many times you wanted to tell Lando. After your first date, he teased you about your dress wondering who you were getting fancy for. 

You had arrived at Oscar's for the first time, he was waiting outside on his front step. You quickly texted Lando saying you had arrived and put the car in park.

"There you are!" He exclaimed as you got out of the car. 

"Yeah sorry I'm late, Lando kept me held up a bit," you apologized, "he was just being protective."

"Did you tell him it was me" he said opening the door.

"No, no I didn't," you followed him inside. 

"He's going to find out eventually you know, now that you are going to start coming over here," he said sitting on the couch holding out his arm for you to join him. You sat resting your head on his shoulder. 

"I know he's going to find out Osc," you said, "I will tell him eventually, well when we are 'us'." You dropped the subtle hint of wanting to put a label on your relationship. You two had some great dates, that led to great nights in your car.

"Us? You want to be an 'us'?" He asked sitting up straight. 

"Well yeah," you smiled as you slid your hands up to his shoulders and to the back of his neck. 

"Yeah?" He smirked matching your energy as his hands found your waist pulling you closer. 

"Yeah" you said leaning in, closing your eyes, feeling your heartbeat elevate, as your lips found his. Your fingers moved up into the waves of his hair, pushing them out of his face. His hand found the back of your neck, pulling you closer. 

Moments later you both took a breath, 

"So is this official," you said slowly scraping his scalp as he nuzzled into your neck placing gentle kisses, giving you goosebumps. He gave no response,

"Oscar?" You said pushing his forehead back for you to see his face. 

"Yes, Y/N, yes I want you to be my girlfriend," he said taking a breath before leaning in again to lock his lips with yours. You pulled away, 

"You're serious?" You smiled.

"Yes, Y/N I want to be your boyfriend, I want to call you my girlfriend, please let me be that to you!" He begged. You smirked, kissing his forehead as he pushed you back laying his weight on top of you, falling into the comfort of the couch.

"My boyfriend Oscar," you smiled before pecking his cheek. 

"I like that," he grinned. 

The two of you had lost track of time, after one movie, one container of ice cream shared, and many deep breaths later. You two had begun drifting off when you felt your phone buzz on your lap, it was not Lando, however, it was a nice indicator to see that it was almost midnight when you had gotten there at 8pm, remembering your promise to Lando you would be back by 12:30 the latest.

"Oh shit, Oscar I gotta go, Lando's probably asleep thinking I'm home already! Or he's freaking out!" You jumped off the couch jolting him out of his tired state. 

"Come on get up Osc," you pulled his arm. He pulled you back towards him.

"A few more minutes," he pleaded rubbing his eyes.

"No." You said sternly. He stood up looking through the blanket for his shirt, stretching, making it harder for you to leave.

"Please," he smiled holding his shirt.

"No no no," you rushed to put your shoes on, he followed quickly behind you knowing you were serious this time. You ran out to your car fumbling for your keys, with Oscar right behind.

"Text me when you get home," he said leaving you with one last goodbye kiss. 

"I will," you smiled as he shut your door. You waved and drove off once you had seen he got back inside. 

There you were speeding home to your best friend and roommate's place. The panic filled you on what you would have to tell Lando. It made you drive even faster. You pulled up in front of your home, looking in your mirror making sure there was no evidence of what had happened. You were scrambling to get your key and go inside quietly. The place was dark, one light on in your kitchen, you moved towards the light, finding a grinning Lando waiting. 

"Well well well," he smirked. 

"I'm so sorry I'm late, please go to bed I know you're tired." You said trying to shoo him upstairs. 

"Not until I found out what's going on with you and Oscar," all the color from your face disappeared with that statement. How did he know?

"What?"

"I can see your location Y/N, I know you were over there." Busted. 

"Lan I was gonna tell you, we were gonna tell you once we knew," you said ashamed, and embarrassed forgetting that one small safety detail. 

"Well seeing as you almost stayed the night, I'm assuming you know," he said. You sat down across from him with your head in your hands. 

"Okay Okay I get it," you rolled your eyes. 

"Y/N and Oscar" he teased, "You know I knew something was up in the paddock."

"Lando stop it!" you blushed

"I always know," he chuckled, "You deserve an Oscar for your acting on hiding this from me,"

"Ha ha very funny," you rolled your eyes sarcastically. 

"You and Oscar, it was very obvious" he teased again.

"Me and Oscah!" You said making fun of his accent. He pushed your shoulder as you got up, and you stuck your tongue out at him. The two of you headed upstairs to your rooms. He knocked on the wall once you had turned the light off, you glanced at your phone to see messages waiting.

Land hoe 🙄: He texted me, wow great start telling him you would text him and you didn't, he's just like you with the worrying, you two are a perfect match 😍🤢

Osc 🧡: Did you make it?

Please tell me you made it?

I'm assuming you did.

Well Y/N Lando is going to find out cause I'm going to ask if you made it home. 

Oh you were telling him, sorry 😘

"Sorry," you called through the wall. You answered Oscar's messages drifting off to sleep smiling as your eyes could barely stay open any longer. You were at peace knowing that you didn't have to hide this from your best friend anymore, and knowing that Oscar was your boyfriend, and you were his girlfriend. 

[hurricane105]

💋 Friday Kiss Tag 💋

Rules: From your Story/WIP, share a kiss. It can be any kiss—from familial pecks on the cheek, forehead kisses, platonic smooches, to full-blown makeouts. Spread the love! ❤️

Rules: Share a snippet of your writing!

Thanks for the tag @drsteggy! I'm tagging @demiboydemon, @zeldaelmo, @mrslrigtar, and anyone else who wants to play, no pressure!

This is from the TP Zelink marriage of convenience fic that wasn't supposed to be a longfic but is going to be anyway. It's currently titleless - usually titles come to me pretty early, but not for this one. This snippet is from their wedding (I had a LOT of fun figuring out what a Hylian royal wedding would look like):

The priests finally finish the vows and lift the cord, coiling it into the shape of the Triforce. Nayru's priestess lifts a loop and settles it over her shoulders; she can here Farore's priest do the same to Link. Din's priest holds the third loop up, draping it over a giant golden bird - the same bird that is on every shield, every banner, every piece of parchment on her desk - to represent the kingdom of Hyrule, and the people they have both promised to protect.

The priests prompt them both through their lines, and then it's time for the exchange of earrings. Auru hands Zelda the new set for Link - double hoops on a stud. She's putting them on Link's ears, careful not to poke him, and she can tell he's watching her. If they weren't in front of a crowd, she'd ask him what he's thinking, but as it is, all she can do is slide the backs on the earrings and give him a polite smile.

Rusl and Uli hand Link her earrings - ones that match his new ones - and then he's fumbling with the earring and her ear. She can tell that he's being as careful as he can to avoid poking her too. She wants to tell him that she's less sensitive than she looks, that he doesn't need to be quite so careful, and then it occurs to her that maybe that's what he wanted to say earlier.

Zelda takes a deep breath, leaning forward, and Link's lips touch hers, soft and warm, and the thought goes through her mind that it feels better than she expected. It feels like he's really promising to stay with her and help take care of Hyrule, like it's not just for show.

Or maybe she's reading far too much into a kiss that only lasts a few seconds, before they break apart, and turn together, to lead the procession to the ballroom.

[winterandwords]

Friday kiss tag

Thanks to @oh-no-another-idea for tagging me! I'm late, but I'm doing it anyway 😁

📝 Post a smooch from your writing for Friday. It can be as light as a peck or as intense as a makeout. It can be romantic or platonic or familial. As long as a smooch takes place it’s free reign!

This is from Spin Cylinder (Brett's POV)...

My eyes snap open at the chill of metal against my throat, just under my chin. You look serene, content, leaning over me as you press the blade into my skin. “Noah?” “Mm?” “That’s the wrong edge.” You break into a smile and fold the razor shut. “If it was the right edge, you’d be bleeding out.” I pull you down for a kiss and you taste like mint and words that could stop my heart. I let myself fall into an imagined future of what it would be like to die in your arms. And the part of my brain that deals in omens and comforts corrects that thought to what it will be like.

Tagging @thegreatobsesso, @revenantlore, @pertinax--loculos and @sarandipitywrites if you'd like to do it, with an open tag for anyone else who wants to join in 💙

Reblogs, replies etc on my tag posts are always welcome, but if you're doing this tag yourself, please make your own post instead of using mine to start a reblog chain.

[lamuradex]

Friday Kiss Tag (And Writing Share) 💋

Let's get romantic. Thanks to @the-golden-comet for the tag.

But first, the rules.

Rules: From your story/WIP, share a kiss. It can be any kiss, from familial pecks on the cheek, forehead kisses, platonic smooches, to full-blown makeouts.

And, as always, if you don’t have a kiss available you can always use this post as a writing share!

Rules: Share a snippet of your story/wip

Now, I've already said that October was gonna be the month for Stitches of the Mind, but the only kissing in that is... not exactly romantic. It's a horror novel after all.

But it is Spooky Month, so I'm going with it.

Here's a creepy kiss, where a woman who has mostly lost her mind is kissing a doll made in the image of a serial killer she's in love with. Enjoy!

Rhianne rested contentedly on the floor of her back room, her arms coated in faint scratches. Pretty Penny lay beside her, the doll’s delicate claws resting in two bowls. A pretty little manicure for a pretty little thing. The bowls were filled with water and antiseptic. Rhianne knew what she wanted, and that did not include infections. She held a cloth, dipped the end in the cleansing fluid, and grasped one of the doll’s limbs. She pressed the rag into its grasp, and with her help, Pretty Penny spread the anti-bacterial on her scratches. The disinfectant burned sharply, but the loving touch behind it made it worthwhile. Rhianne leant over and kissed her companion on the cheek. Right on the tip of her scar. Her eyes moved to its chest, and the only strange mark on the fabric form. A long set of stitches like a surgical scar between hypothetical ribs. They weren’t part of the original design. A new addition, one might say.

Alright, a creepy kiss. I need to work out more spooky stuff to post.

Anyway, here are my usual tags:

@wintherlywords @stephtuckerauthor @fayeiswriting @mikathewriter @agirlandherquill

By the way, if anyone doesn't want to be tagged, or alternatively would love to be tagged, feel free to let me know. Currently I'm just tagging Writeblr mutuals, as best as I can work out.

[daytaker]

What do you rank each obey me character from your favorite to your least?

Oh lord, I've thought about doing this before but it's so hard because it's constantly shifting? Let me seeeeee...

The ultimate ranking I've decided upon is as follows:

Mammon

Satan

Leviathan

Asmodeus

Solomon

Simeon

Lucifer

Barbatos

Luke

Beelzebub

Belphegor

Diavolo

TO BE CLEAR, I like Diavolo. Also, 4-8 are all basically tied. Yes, I put Barbatos in position 8 on purpose, yes, I'm aware that was low-hanging fruit. The whole list is also very fluid. Over the course of playing the games and existing in the fan space, Solomon has been my number 3 and my number 12.

ALSO! A lot of this is just "my opinions based on the vibes I get and nothing else". So please don't take anything too seriously. I'm definitely not claiming to have perfect, inarguable takes.

S Tier

These guys are consistently my Boys, my Faves, the ones I Love. I'd marry Mammon. I'd start a cult with Satan. I'd use phrases like "my little meow meow" in service of explaining my feelings for Levi.

1. Mammon

I mean, whenever I think he's not my favorite, he comes back and reminds me that he is, so I might as well just bow to the inevitable. I love a tsundere himbo. He's funny and cute and he makes my heart do the thing. My stone cold frozen aromantic heart.

2. Satan

Ah, my complex relationship with Satan, who is the worst-developed character in the OG but comes careening back into the running with an excellent display of character development in Nightbringer. Satan, for whom I simp, but who is also my feral child. Satan, who is coded autistic entirely unintentionally but whose attempts at being romantic hit me like bricks to the face and I just want him to please stop trying to be flirty and instead talk to me about cats or science or whatever hyperfixation he happens to be focusing on because it's much more attractive. Satan, who, after overblotting on wrath, just kind of passed out instead of going insane like Mammon and Asmo and everybody because he deals with this shit all day every day anyway. Satan, who deserves to be number one on this list because he occupies so much space in my brain but continues to lose out to Mammon because Mammon's blushing feels more sincere.

3. Leviathan

The unexpected addition to this list. I dunno, he's always growing on me. He's so funny. Possibly the funniest character in the game. I love writing him. He's so cute. He's so cringe. I can relate to one of those things. I don't really have any great reasons why I love him so much. I just do. He's so fun. I love his pets. I love that he got the pet show cancelled by summoning Lotan. I love him in the anime cosplaying as Ruri-chan. Actually, yeah, the anime. He got the best rep in the anime to me because he is so cute and funny in that thing.

A Tier

I love them, I will go to bat for them, I will kiss them, I will bring them their lunch if they forgot it at home, I will sing them lullabies, I will kiss their precious cheeks, but I will not marry them. (Edit: I will not marry them, with the exception of Simeon, who I would absolutely marry if he deigned to ask me.)

4. Asmodeus

He's just a fun guy? He's really sweet and caring and somehow doesn't feel like he's actually hitting on me? I've described him in a DM with someone as "your gay best friend who you make out with sometimes" and I seriously do get platonic vibes from him and I'm here for it. I'm here for platonic makeout sessions. As an aro who likes when fictional boys flirt with me sometimes but not too much, he's a very welcome breath of fresh air because his flirting just doesn't feel like it's aimed at anything? He just likes to call you a cutie pie. And I know that none of that makes sense for a character who is the literal avatar of lust, but I'm talking vibes, not reality.

5. Solomon

Solomon can ride this scale from close to the top to rock bottom to be honest. I did not like him during the recent event (Voyages). He just felt creepy to me. And that's where my problems with Solomon lie for the most part. Much like with the Asmo vibes, he just feels creepy to me. I think he's too openly infatuated and too comfortable with that fact for me? Like slow down my guy, I'm here to be jokingly flirted with not asked to cosign a mortgage. But also the panties came OFF for that confrontation with Belphie in the colosseum so congrats on your new placement as number 5. I like a lot of fandom interpretations of him significantly more than canon ones so when I go back to canon I'm always a little like "eughhh what is this?"

6. Simeon

Okay, here are my reasons. 1) He's the most beautiful character. Nobody else even comes close. Don't ask me why, he just is. 2) Plot things that I haven't even gotten to yet but if you know you know. 3) I I like how nonjudgmental he is about literal demons like he just pops in from Heaven like "let's all be friends". What a chill dude. Bonus 4) Luke's dad.

7. Lucifer

First of all, if he ever genuinely hits on me I'm hitting on HIM with pepper spray. Dad, what the fuck? Second, he just loves his brothers so much and works so hard for them and wants so badly to protect them. I admire that. I do not get any genuine chemistry between him and the main character, though that could be my romance-radar malfunctioning as usual, or even just my taste. "That's my dad, I can't marry my dad."

8. Barbatos

Another character in whom I see no chemistry with the main character, but that's okay and I love him anyway. He's number 8 because he loves being number 8. He's the second-prettiest boy after Simeon in my opinion and I like to imagine him being an absolute menace who never sleeps, never bathes, and never uses the bathroom. He has transcended all that. He is the Time Lord.

B Tier

My beloved babies (and drunk uncle)! I have no romantic interest in any of them whatsoever! One because he's an actual child and the others because I just don't. But I love them and I cherish them and I will bring them their lunches if they forgot them at home just as much as I would for tier A.

9. Luke

Yes, he's whiny. Yes, he's kind of weird to even have in the game let alone the intimacy system. No, I have never and will never call him a Chihuahua. I will beat up his bullies, including Lucifer and Mammon. I will file for joint custody with Simeon. He's so flippin' cute.

10. Beelzebub

Another classic good boy. I love him but I don't really see much in him beyond... being a good boy? He's sweet and I would give him so many hugs and he deserves so much love but I can't get over the idea that that head is empty, there is nothing inside but cheeseburgers. And I kind of love that for him.

11. Belphegor

When I first started the game I thought I'd like him best. Turns out I was wrong. Now, I don't hold it against him that he murdered me. Sometimes a demon has just gotta do what a demon's gotta do. He's a little shit, but he also did that thing in the anime where he's Beel's cheerleader while he fails at a video game? And that moment will forever be enshrined in my heart.

I mean look at him??? Holy shit???? Just seeing this image again makes me want to kick him up to number 6 or something.

12. Diavolo

I love my gay drunk uncle as much as the next person but when your gay drunk uncle sometimes hits on you, it's extremely uncomfortable. I'm not like an active Dialuci shipper but I fully support Diavolo's unapologetic simping for his totally platonic right hand man. And then he wants to get in my pants and it's like having ice water dumped down my shirt.

So there you have it! My little ranking and thoughts on each character. I'm curious whether any of this surprises you?

[tnc-n3cl]

💋 Friday Kiss Tag 💋

Rules: From your Story/WIP, share a kiss. It can be any kiss—from familial pecks on the cheek, forehead kisses, platonic smooches, to full-blown makeouts. Spread the love! ❤️ Rules: Share a snippet of your writing!

Thanks for the tag @zeawesomebirdie !

Oh, I uh... don't have many scenes that fit this one, heh... (Well scenes that are written anyway...) And uh, they pretty much all involve Rito! This is from an upcoming chapter of The Ballad of Kass, which actually involves Teba and Saki. It is a little spoilery, but not too much. I'mma put it under the read more, and instead of tagging anyone specifically just say that anyone who sees this and wants to join in can! (It's pretty tame but just in case... Content warning: "nude" bird people, horny thoughts)

In his roost, Teba takes off his Chuchu jelly-stained armor and sets it on the floor.  He’s far too exhausted to try and clean it right now.  Honestly, it’s probably pointless, the jelly has likely already done enough damage to the leather by now that he’ll have to replace it.

He turns and watches Saki standing over Tulin’s hammock.  He’s finally asleep, and while Teba wouldn’t mind holding his son all night, he’s grateful he can lie down in his hammock and not have to sit all night. 

The lantern light reflects nicely off Saki’s beautiful feathers and he can’t help himself.  He walks over to her and puts his wings around her and gently presses his beak into her dense pluma [hair].  Then he begins running it back and forth. 

“Teba,” she says, “What are you doing?”

His voice muffled by her pluma, he responds softly, “I can’t show my wife a little affection?”

She sounds rather annoyed as she answers, “Not with that Chuchu jelly smeared all over your beak.”

He gasps and backs away; he’d almost forgotten about that!  “Sorry,” he mumbles as he pours some water in a washbowl and dips a cloth in it.  Then he tries his damnedest to clean the dried jelly off.  It’s not working…

Saki chuckles, “Here let me help.”

She takes a bar of soap out of their cleaning supplies and cuts a small piece off and places it in the water.  Then she dips the cloth in it and presses it to his beak.  His heart beats a little faster.

After a moment she finishes and dries his beak off with another cloth, “There,” she says, “All better.”

He leans in and wraps his wings around her again, and rubs his beak against her forehead.  She places her wings around his midsection.  He hugs her a little tighter, and reaches for the straps keeping her clothes on.

She breaks away from him, “I’m hardly in the mood for this right now.”

Teba sighs, “I’m sorry, honestly I’m too exhausted to do much more than hold you right now.”

She looks him in the eyes, and those beautiful blue eyes of hers bore into him, “And yet you’re trying to take my clothes off.”

His heart skips a beat, “I…”

She smiles, then takes her clothes off and wraps her wings around him.  She nuzzles her beak against his neck and he whispers, “I’m sorry I missed our evening meal.”

“It’s fine,” she replies, “The village was in danger and you did what had to be done.”

A sob escapes her beak, “I knew what I was getting into when I married you.”

He hugs her tighter, Goddess how he hates to hear her cry.  He hates being away from his family, but he has to keep them safe.  He has to keep everyone safe.  It’s why he became a Warrior in the first place.

“I’m sorry,” he chirps softly and he tilts his head down towards her.

She nips at the feathers around the base of his beak, “Teba, I…”

His mind races, is this really happening?  His crest rises and he asks, “Yes love?”

“I don’t want you training Tulin at the Flight Range anymore.  He’s too young.”

He breaks away from her and huffs, “Really?  You want to have this argument now?”

She scoffs and climbs into her hammock.

“Shit,” he whispers to himself as he climbs into his.  He reaches out his wing and places it on her, “Saki, can we talk about this later?  I don’t want to wake Tulin.”

“It’s always later for you, isn’t it,” she huffs, “You might not get a ‘later’ Teba.” 

That stings more than he cares to admit, but his damn stubbornness makes him dig in his talons, “You know how much Tulin likes going to the Flight Range, do you really want to deny him that?”

She pushes his wing off her and rolls over to face him and glares at him with her feathers raised.

Goddess, he’s an idiot!

He softens his tone, “I’m sorry.  Besides its not like I can take him with Vah Medoh keeping us grounded.”

“Oh, like you won’t drag him off as soon as it’s appeased!”

The biggest idiot ever…

“I…”  He pauses trying desperately to think of something that will soothe her wrath.  “What if you come with us?”

“What?”

He sits up, “Yeah, the three of us could go to the Flight Range.  Spend some time together as a family.”

Her feathers relax and she sits up as well, she tilts her head to the side and just stares at him for a moment.  In spite of his exhaustion, he suddenly has the urge to leap into her hammock with her, and run his beak across every inch of her body.  Especially that lovely violet patch on her breast.

Perhaps he’ll even do more than that…

“Alright,” she replies, pulling him from lustful thoughts, “After Vah Medoh’s dealt with.”

[extasiswings]

I continued this audiobook despite my complaints about early plot holes and now that I’m finished am back to complain again that if you are marketing your series as a romance, yet at the end of 2 books with a collective 850+ pages, the two main characters who are supposed to be the romantic focal point are a) still doing the will-they-won’t-they/denial/“oh no I can’t do this” thing and b) have had exactly one makeout session and otherwise maybe 3 short kisses in a variety of circumstances, then you should stop marketing your series as a romance. Especially if you’re sidelining the romance at every turn even if I ignore the lack of physical development (like…these characters are stuck in a cycle of one step forward, twelve steps back where as soon as anything happens someone gets cold feet and I’m sorry but you can only repeat that cycle so many times with the same pairing before your audience starts being Over It). [Sidenote, but there was a reveal at the end of this second book that was heavily implying a whole True Love’s Kiss magic thing had happened earlier when at the time in question he…kissed her hand. Please be SO SERIOUS RN (see below for more on I would be fine with this if they were supposed to be close and platonic, I’m totally down for a family or friends TLK situation, but again this is theoretically supposed to be a romance)]

I do think it comes back to genre confusion though (which was one of my original complaints). It’s not claiming to be YA but has moments where it drops into feeling more like YA (compared to, say, India Holton’s Wisteria Society books which are very fun and whimsical but I never question that I’m reading a book written for adults), it claims to be “fantasy romance” but there’s very little actual romance happening (whether between the mains or the side pairings the author has thrown in for idk what reason other than to balloon the page count because they don’t add anything to the plot). Honestly, the series feels a lot like it wants to be Discworld (but isn’t clever enough) and the author isn’t confident enough in the fantasy world/plot itself to let it stand on its own as fantasy so instead there’s mediocre romance thrown in to prop it up (because frankly, I think there’s very little that would change for the underlying fantasy plot if the mains who are supposed to be so in love had a strong/close platonic relationship instead, and in fact I think the series could maybe benefit from that because then by the end of over 850 pages we wouldn’t be stuck on the nth repetition of “I love you but oh no I couldn’t possibly admit that and certainly couldn’t be with you” while I bang my head against the wall).

Anyway, tldr, Romance(TM) is a whole genre with its own conventions etc. It’s not easy to write and it’s not for every author. So if you’re not interested in (or perhaps capable of) writing a Romance Novel, then be honest about what you are writing, because if you’re marketing to a romance reader like me and I’m expecting to read a romance and your book/series is Not That, well then I’m just going to be annoyed.

[sflow-er]

Okay so... time for some thoughts of my own.

Had this poll been conducted before S3, my vote would have actually been "strictly platonic (non-shipper)". I may write fic about them, but in canon, their portrayal has never crossed the line from platonic to romantic. I also feel that it isn't really possible to tell a happy background love story with them in a satisfactory way considering what we know about them (especially Henry's background), and I seriously doubted the makers of YR would want to tell an unhappy one.

That last point still holds true, but as of the finale, I feel like their portrayal has shifted to "open to interpretation" after all. Here is why.

The meadow scene is a blatant parallel to Wilmon on the football field in S1E4. See this post by @waltybrainrot for screenshots. Basically, we have Wille/Henry passed out or on the verge of it, lying with his face to the side. Then we have Simon/Walter hauling him up and looking after him. All of this takes place in a field of green grass - the plastic turf of the football field for Wilmon, a lush meadow for Walty. There is no reason whatsoever for the scene to be set and filmed like this except as a wink to the Walty shippers.

The order of scenes in YR is not random but often used to connect things for the viewer. Sometimes the connection is relevant to the current narrative (e.g. the cuts between Sara&Micke in the car and August leaving the dorm in S3E3 or the S1 scenes that cut between dinner at Hillerska and the Eriksson house) but it can also be a more obscure connection that will only make sense later on. For example the camera work in S1E2, which cuts from August working out before rowing practice to Sara riding Rousseau before class. Feels like seemingly non-sequitur scene-setting imagery but also serves to connect these characters in your mind and foreshadow some similarities and an upcoming relationship between them. So why does Walty's meadow scene follow Stedrika's friends-to-lovers makeout session, and why are they the only other glimpse we get of background characters waking up that day (instead of, say, Nils and Vincent who are more central to the narrative)...?

The outtake that could be seen on director Linnéa Roxeheim's IG (first posted here by @youngroyalsnshameless) is not canon, but the fact that she posted it may tell us something about the writers' initial intentions:

I mean... It sure would be easy to read a Heartstopper reference into this, what with the obvious bi flag lighting. Or a SKAM S3 reference, what with the red cups and stripes of neon face paint. Which by the way almost resemble a Pride flag here, and their placement on the cheek almost looks like a "this character is queer" meme.

(And if you really want to go off the deep end, you can also note that the stripes look bright green - a colour that used to be associated with gay men, as popularised by Oscar Wilde, who also popularised the idea of wearing a green carnation on the lapel, which may have been referenced by Wille's crochet flower in S3E5. But that's already quite far down so let's swim back up now. I mostly just wrote this bit to demonstrate the kinds of leaps we fans can take so don't take it too seriously.)

Anyway, when you put all this together, it sure starts to look like the makers knew exactly what they were doing with Walty at and after the party. They knew this fandom always liked to analyse and find hidden meanings and parallels, and they knew Walty shippers would be on the lookout for any clues. So they delivered, in a way that would not feel too obvious (cutting out the HS/SKAM parallel) or unrealistic (letting us infer that something might happen between them without making us wonder how and whether it would work out).

So yeah, I would say "open to interpretation" now. And although I still don't consider myself a shipper, I do feel more like a fan than a non-shipper trying to trace the parallels.

Time for a little Walty (Henry/Walter)* poll!

*Or Valty (Henry/Valter) if you prefer. I'm sticking with the W.

It's safe to say that S3 and the meadow scene in particular have made many people more aware of this background ship and may have even shifted some viewers' perceptions of them. I figured it might be fun to see if thoughts on their status at the end of canon differ between shippers/fans and non-shippers.

So, hcs and fanon aside...

Feel free to justify your choice in the tags/replies! Please be respectful though - I don't want to see any ship wars or hate for these characters, people who enjoy them or even people who dislike them!

Reblogs for larger sample size are much appreciated! Will reblog with my own thoughts later.

[danses-with-dogmeat]

Ooooo you're doing yandere alphabet stuff!!! If you dont mind, may I add on to that anon's request? When you get to FO4 can you include Glory, Dima, and platonic Father? And when you get to FNV, Ulysses, Graham, Benny, and Yesman?? Thank you! I really liked the FO3 post!

Yandere Headcannons Part 3: Fallout 4 Companions + Extras

So here is the third and final installment to this little series! I hope y'all enjoyed it, and if you want me to add anyone else, of course just lmk :)

Included Below: Cait, Curie, Danse, Deacon, Father, DiMA, Glory, Hancock, Kellogg, MacCready, Nick, Piper, Preston, & X6-88

(Also, sorry if DiMA is completely out of character, I've never met him in-game, and I didn't have time to do as much research as I normally would, but hopefully it's not too obvious 😅)

Here is Part 1 (FO3 Companions)

Here is Part 2 (FONV Companions + Extras)

I hope you enjoy!

Also, just a TW for typical yandere behavior: unhealthy relationships, guilt trips, manipulation, lack of consent, control, allusions to suicide, blood, threats, and mentions of murder ahead!

Cait:

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

She’d only mock them if they were being a baby about it. Sole thinks this is bad? Try being enslaved by raiders, why doncha. She has no sympathy for them at all; whatever it is she’s putting them through, there ain’t no way it’s close to the kinda suffering she went through at the hands of the animals who bought her when she was younger. She doesn’t beat them, even if they deserve it, doesn’t do anythin’ without their consent (though she might complain about it), and they got food, water and shelter under her care. As far as Cait’s concerned, Sole can either shut the fuck up, or thank her for keepin’ them bloody safe.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

She’s sort of a “tough love” type gal. Lots of punches to the shoulder, or bumping into them affectionately in public, and some more genuine forms of physical touch in private, like playing with their hair, or hot n’ heavy makeout seshes on the sofa, maybe even massages if they’re feelin’ up to it, but she does require consent first. Especially when it comes to sex. She still likes to be intimate with her partner, and thinks it’s a good release for both of them, and she might grumble about them refusing her and say they’re being ridiculous, but Cait wouldn’t do anything, especially anything sexual, against their will. She knows what that shit is like, and wouldn’t catch herself becoming like the monsters who owned her, under any circumstance.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Cait doesn’t tend to look too far ahead. Every time she tries to make a plan, it ends up getting fucked over anyway, so she just tends to go with it, whatever “it” might be. One thing she does know though, she likes Sole. They treated her right, even from the start. No one had ever done that with her before. Even the few people she could say she cared about didn’t ever treat her right. Maybe that’s why she’s done this… Why she needs Sole all to herself. The people she’s cared about… She’s lost all of them, one way or another. That shite’s not gonna happen again, that’s the only thing the lass is certain of.

T) Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream/cry/or isolate themselves?

She wishes she could just clench her jaw and give ‘em a rap over the head to shut ‘em up. Wishes she could be removed from it, uncaring and unaffected, but the truth is, it makes her chest ache. Cait tends to lash out, to raise her voice and tell them to suck it up, if only so she doesn’t have to hear their wailing anymore, so she doesn’t have to see their tears. An’ it’s not ‘cause it annoys her, though that may be how it comes off, but it really hurts her when she thinks they might not want to be with her the way she needs to be with them. Cait may be rough with them when they sniffle and whine, but once they’ve calmed down she always tries to comfort them afterwards, in her own way, at least. She’ll drape an arm around their shoulders, wipe their tears away with a calloused finger, maybe even give their forehead a tender kiss, followed by a whispered apology and a period of silence where she just clings to them and tries to make them understand where she’s coming from. It’s not that Cait doesn’t know why they’re sad, she does. She gets it, she just wishes it wasn’t because of her. Yet still, she can’t seem to let them go.

Curie:

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Though Curie is clingy and a bit controlling, she doesn’t have a cruel bone in her body. She wouldn’t mock Sole for being upset, and would become upset herself at their negative reaction to being by her side. If she's not cruel, and if she loves them, why wouldn't they want to be with her? Honestly, she just wants to understand what she's doing wrong, and try to be the most ideal companion to her love that she can be.

U) Unique. Would they do anything different from classic yandere?

She’s so much kinder to her beloved than most. She doesn’t understand that what she is doing is wrong. This was how she was always shown affection when it came to being in the vault; the doctors were never unkind to her, necessarily, and she couldn’t possibly be horrible to her companion, it’s just all she knows. It's not imprisonment to her, it's just... living, and though the doctors and her were underground for so long, imprisoned in their own way, it was the time in her life when people were kindest to her, when she had purpose, when she could care for others and know their care in return. It's really all the synth knows.

She wouldn’t try to be manipulative, and she is alright with Sole spending time with others, so long as they always come back to her in the end. She is vastly more loving and considerate than traditional yandere characters, but she does maintain a level of control over her partner, an infatuation and a dependence on them that isn’t present in healthy relationships.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

She doesn’t see that what she’s doing is wrong; therefore, it’s difficult for her to regret any of it. Curie is kind to her love, she’s supportive, and she never leaves their side; how could they be unhappy? If they make their discomfort known to her, she has a hard time understanding it, but she will express apology, and perhaps make it seem as though she regrets her controlling actions, but she’s not sure how honest she’s being when communicating her regret. She’s more just stating what she thinks Sole wants to hear, but again, she doesn’t see her actions as anything worth regretting.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Curie tends to have a pre-war, idealized version of the future she would like for her and Sole. Though now she knows that it’s unlikely, or perhaps even impossible, for the pair to have such a life in the current world they live in, Curie is determined to come as close as she can. She feels that her partner deserves some peace after everything they’ve been through, and she wouldn’t mind some for herself either. However, this would be a distant future plan. For now, the synth is content traveling the Commonwealth with her beloved partner at her side, so that she can observe and learn as much as possible.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

She loves speaking with her love about anything and everything, especially if they want to tell her about their difficulties, and their past. Curie tends not to think of her past as being something worth saying much about, though. She stayed in one room for 200 years, most of which she spent in solitude (apart from the mole rats), and what she does recall from her past that involves others only makes her sad. She’d rather hear about Sole’s life, rather than chitter on about her uneventful one, and she’d much rather help with their problems than have to speak at length about her old friends who shared the vault with her all those years ago. However, she’s more than happy to tell Sole often and how much she cares about them.

Danse:

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

For the most part, no. Danse believes in respect above all else, and if he expects it from his partner, he'll be damned if he doesn't treat them with it in return. He's emotional, vulnerable and desperate after finding out the truth about himself, but he won't let it cloud his judgement enough to disregard his core values. He just wants Sole near to him. Wherever they want to go, whatever they want to do, as long as it's ethical and in accordance with the ideals he upholds, Danse will be satisfied, just as long as they're by his side.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

If Sole isn't comfortable, he won't show his affection for them. It's as simple as that, though, it will always be there. Mostly, Danse gives verbal praise and shows them he cares by tending to their needs. It's more difficult for him to be physically affectionate if he has to initiate, and he won't do so at all if Sole is uncertain about it, but in time, he finds that he likes to spend private moments with his partner wrapped in his arms. Feeling them physically there beside him, being able to touch them and know they're there, it's what he needs more than anything. His time in the Brotherhood left little room for showing affection, especially of the physical sort, and his fears of being utterly alone coupled with the fact that he's been touch starved for the majority of his life have left Danse nervous in the face of intentional physical affection, but nonetheless, in utter need of it. If only in order to feel as though he isn't the cold, hard, synthetic monster he thinks of himself as.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

He's a soldier, through and through. As such, Danse's punishments would be of a similar sort of consequence as they would have been in the Brotherhood. Physical punishment in the form of exercises, chores and cleaning in purposefully inefficient ways, even writing lines are all disciplinary tactics he would use to his advantage. Danse likes to think that he tries to separate his more Commanding Officer-esque personality traits, from his personal, romantic life, but when it comes to punishment, this is all the ex-Paladin knows.

S) Stigma. What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc.)?

His earth shattering identity crises threw his entire perception of reality off kilter. Danse has never witnessed particularly shining examples of proper healthy relationships, which doesn't help in this case, but more so than that, is his utter desperation to not be alone. The stinging betrayal of the closest thing he's ever had to family is still running rampant through his mind and causing an insatiable ache in his synthetic heart. He can't imagine how anyone could possibly pay him any mind after finding out the truth of his identity, but now that Sole has? How the hell could he possibly ever let them go? They're literally all that he has left, and he's clinging to them as desperately as he can without damaging them.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Danse tends to be matter-of-fact about his vulnerability. He's open with his words and trying to make sense of his own feelings, but he rarely lets himself be vulnerable in a more emotional sense. He'll do his level best at refraining from crying in their presence, and tries not to let his anger or frustration or guilt be expressed in a physical way, and even something as simple as laughter is scarce at the best of times. But his ability with words, and the way he's forced himself to engage in heart to heart conversations over the years, they pay off in the sense that his partner often knows what Danse is thinking, or feeling, but they really do have to take his word for it, because that's likely all they're going to get, unless they initiate their own physical contact.

Deacon:

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Deacon’s “abduction” of Sole is more of a manipulation of their mind than it is a physical imprisonment. He uses his wit and verbal skillset to convince Sole to only trust him, to only depend on him and the causes that he supports. It’s all in their best interest, he tells himself, even as he methodically cuts each of their friends out of their life and takes up more and more of their time until he’s the only one left in their life that they can rely on.

This whole process is against their will, but Deacon cuts everyone out at such a steady rate, takes away their freedoms over a considerable amount of time, and refuses to do anything physical without their consent; he’s so periodic and careful that Sole hardly notices their freedoms being repressed until it’s already done, until even they feel like what Deacon is doing is for the best.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He’s extremely closed off at first, and even when it does seem like he’s finally opening up to them, he proves himself a liar all over again, at every chance. It’s only after Sole is his, when he has them safely at his side, when there’s nothing left that they could hide from him, that he decides to slowly reveal pieces of his past. It’s difficult, even impossible sometimes, to tell if he’s lying or not, but he knows. It’s no easy thing for him, and it’s rare at best, but slowly, methodically, the spy unravels his story for his beloved, if only so they can understand his actions now, where he’s come from, what he’s gone through, and why he chose them to share his true self with.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He has a hard enough time with affection when his partner is enthusiastic about it, so if Sole refuses him in any way, he’s not even going to consider forcing them. But if they seem into it, and after a good amount of time spent with them, Deacon will become comfortable enough to initiate small forms of physical affection. Mostly it starts off being contact of a silly sort: nose boops, finger holding (as opposed to whole hand-holding), random tickles, head pats, noogies, and the like.

Before anything physical occurs, Deacon will be verbally affectionate by sharing jokes, words of advice, little compliments and such, as a sort of temporary replacement/start to affection of a more physical nature.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

He throws a few jokes Sole’s way, but they usually have little to do with his manipulation and are just generally used to make them feel inadequate enough that they feel they have to depend on him for their own well-being. Beyond that, Deacon isn’t cruel physically, and his mocking is always humorous enough that they may not realize how much it wears on their self esteem until he’s already got them convinced they can’t survive without him.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

This was touched on a bit earlier (See: D), but mostly he just separates them from all other sources of possible emotional support, all friends they’ve made, or what’s left of their family, and he forces them to depend on him for everything they may need in a companion, in a protector, in a friend or a partner. He’s all of it, and because he is, they can’t leave him.

Beyond that, he just ensures that they are passionate about the Railroad’s cause so they both can continue to do their jobs for the faction as a functioning team.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

Usually he just has a discussion with them. Deacon’s violent tendencies died out after everything with the UP Deathclaws came to a horrific close, and he likes to think of himself as being on the chill side of the majority of wasteland residents. Physical punishments aren’t an option for him, no sir, so he’ll just go about convincing them that what they did was foolish, and that all they need to do is trust him if they want to be happy, and if they want to survive out here.

He'll talk them through their mistakes, make it known to his partner how foolish they were, he'll belittle and gaslight enough to the point that they feel as bad about their misbehaving as Deacon does, and they won't do it again.

DiMA:

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

DiMA doesn’t want more from them than just companionship. Someone to share his time with. He’s had that with Nick before, but now… He can’t explain it, but Sole makes him feel whole, like he hasn’t in decades, and just having them near to him is enough. So, he’ll keep them with him in Acadia, and they can learn to be happy here, like so many others, with him at their side. That’s all he wants from them, all he needs is just them, here, at his side. Nothing more. Shouldn't be too hard then, right?

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

He’s always had an ideal future in mind. One where synths are safe, where they can live in peace, unbothered, and untouched; he wants the same future for his Sole. He wants them here with him, always. He wants them to feel safe, to be happy, to care for him in a way no one really has before. DiMA doesn’t know much of love, he’ll admit. It’s always been more of a concept than a feeling to him, but with Sole, he’d like to imagine he could one day know what it feels like to love, and be loved in return.

M) Mask. Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

He tries to be honest about himself, even to newcomers, it’s how he’s established trust with his allies, how he’s been the leader of Acadia with so much success over so many years, and so he is as honest with Sole as he can be. When they brought Nick to him, he could not have been more grateful, and for that, they deserve his genuinity.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

DiMA tells Sole his stories, regales the tales of acquiring Arcadia, of befriending the co-founders, of being in the Institute with Nick, of escaping, of trying to balance the well-being of his own people with the peace of those around him. He also gives praise, often telling Sole how much they mean to him, how grateful he is for their assistance, for bringing his brother back to him, for being there for him. A hand on the shoulder, a pat on the back, pressing his forehead to theirs are all ways that he shows them he cares for them. Perhaps too, if they are willing, if they’d like to try more traditional forms of affection, he knows his body is strange, after all of the alterations, the attachments, but if Sole takes the initiative in response to his kindness towards them, if they should hug him, or perhaps even give him a kiss, DiMA won’t exactly know how to react, but he’ll be grateful. He’s never really felt human before, and he hasn’t had to. He’s a synth, and proud of it, he doesn’t have any delusions about being like Sole is, but he doesn’t feel like he has to, especially if they treat him in such a way. It’s comforting to him, to be seen as human, even if he knows he’s not.

Father (Platonic):

F) Fight. How would they feel if their darling fought back?

It would just make the older man less sympathetic. He sees their reluctance as immature, and the more dramatic they are with their resistance, the less stock he takes in their reactions to his behavior. He thinks of them as being dramatic.

After all, Shaun was forcibly taken at a young age, and raised in the comfort of the Institute. He knows what it's like, and he knows that, if anything, he’s doing his parent a favor. If they don’t recognize that, he doesn’t know how to help them. The Institute is far superior to the surface world, they're safe here, they can build a new life, they can be happy, as he's been all this time. Why are they overreacting this way? It's not like there's anyone left on the surface that they care for, everyone they know, besides him, is long gone. They should be relieved to have him in their life, to start anew in a place where they can remain happy and healthy for years to come.

He’ll try to give them explanations to help them make sense of his actions, if they aren’t too hysterical, and he does want Sole in his life, so he won’t be completely emotionless, but Shaun would much prefer to have a conversation with them rather than try and calm their frantic actions.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Shaun doesn’t show affection in the way most do, but he does want to communicate his desire to rekindle some sort of relationship with his parent. Mostly, Shaun’s forms of affection are shown through actions rather than physical touch, or even words. He’ll ensure his parent is comfortable where they are staying, that they are provided for, and that they feel valued in the society that he is in charge of. However, he does occasionally try to tell his parent their value to him personally, but he’s admittedly not great at it. Physical expressions of affection may be uncomfortably returned, but Shaun wouldn’t initiate.

T) Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream/cry/or isolate themselves?

This is similar to the fighting point. If they are hysterical, Shaun’s sympathy level will be low at best, but he does have a bit more of an emotional reaction if Sole’s own behavior is subdued and despondent. Of course he doesn’t enjoy seeing his parent cry, but he has a hard time understanding their despair. If they’re reserved about it, he will sit and try to talk them through what’s bothering them, or point them in Dr. Volkert's direction for professional help. Shaun does often have a difficult time empathizing with Sole, given the differences in perspective, upbringing, and circumstance, but for them, he really does try.

H) Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Sole may never get the chance to return to the surface again. Beyond that, Shaun isn’t particularly cruel, and Sole is well cared for within the Institute, but their freedom is remarkably oppressed.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Shaun doesn’t tend to be open with his feelings, it’s simply not the way things are in the Institute, but for his parent? He’s more open than with most. Sole doesn’t know Shaun, not as the director, not as a person, and sadly, not even as their son; which is actually liberating for him. With Sole, he can voice certain ideas, concerns, or dreams of his that might otherwise be controversial, or things that he never got to act on, based on his role in the Institute. He enjoys speaking with them, but rarely does the conversation become heartfelt in the way Sole might want.

While Sole might be searching for an apology from their son, some sign that he wishes his upbringing might be different, that he wants to work towards a loving relationship with his parent with the limited time they have left, he rarely obliges these wishes. Mostly, he dismisses the idea, stating that it is all in the past, that there’s nothing that can be done to change it, and though he may seek to have some type of relationship with Sole before his illness claims him, he’s not as sentimental about the idea. He sees their relationship as a practicality now. What they could have had is something based on thin air and futile wishes of being able to go back and change the way things are now by altering the past, but Shaun knows that can never happen, and he knows that Sole is aware of that fact as well. He’ll express that if things were different, he may still have been happy, but for now, there’s nothing either of them can do to alter their positions.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

He doesn’t see his actions as anything worth regretting. His parent should be thanking him for allowing them into this faction, for protecting them from the harsh brutishness of the outside world, he shouldn’t have to apologize for going out of his way to help them… Though, perhaps the way he went about it could have been more mindful when it came to his parent’s comfort level.

Later, but before his death, Shaun will think back on how little he had revealed to them early on, how he wasn’t exactly dishonest, but he certainly wasn’t transparent, and though he won’t regret what he did, he may apologize to Sole for the strife he may have unintentionally caused.

Glory:

G) Game. Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling escape?

It’s not a game, it's a goddamn mission. If Sole leaves her side, Glory assumes they’re in trouble. It’s the kinda mindset you have when you’re a part of the Railroad, and especially if you’re an escaped synth. If she wakes up and they’re gone, she’s going on a fucking hunt for them, and when she finds them, she’s not letting them out of her sight for a solid week, and she’s sure to let them know how much they worried her when they were gone. The Railroad heavy will threaten and guilt trip Sole until they never leave her side again, and she’ll be serious as hell, all throughout.

L) Love Letters. How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

It starts off with a lot of talk. Whenever Sole comes to HQ, the heavy seems to be waiting for them, ready to strike up a conversation, to talk about their last mission, and hers, to brag about her accomplishments, and tell Sole how badass they are, even compared to her. Heart to hearts occur pretty often as well, wherein she tells Sole how grateful she is for having them in the faction, tells them what a difference they’ve made, and how they’ve certainly taken some of the load off of her shoulders.

After the talking comes the companionship. She offers to go on missions with them, even when they can tell that it’s behind Desdemona’s back, or against the Railroad leader's wishes. When they are out on missions together, Glory likes to show off her skills as a heavy, and compliments Sole on their own accomplishments out in the field. The praise leads to a bit of flirting that tends to come off as a joke, just some teasing from one agent to the next, but they become more serious the more that Sole responds to them.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

She takes away bits of their free will slowly, almost methodically, and she doesn’t even notice she’s doing it until it gets out of hand. Glory starts by ensuring she goes with Sole on every mission, she keeps them from having other companions, or working with other agents, and slowly but surely takes up more and more of their time until they can say that Glory is really their only friend.

She wouldn’t ever keep them from helping the Railroad, the faction and its ideals are just too important to her, but all of their missions go through her, and are completed with her assistance. That’s non-negotiable.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

She wouldn’t really see it as abducting, per say. Glory does allow them a good bit of freedom, just so long as she’s involved, and so, it’s unlikely she’d ever regret it.

If Sole really gave her a piece of their mind, if they stood up to her and let Glory know how much she was hurting them, how much she was stifling their freedoms, she might feel bad for a bit, especially considering her background, and her own familiarity with repressed freedoms, but once she spends some time considering their words, she really has a hard time seeing fault in her own actions. She cares about Sole, so of course she always spends time with them. Glory can protect her partner like no one else can, they share so many of the same views and goals, they have the same goddamn job, where else is she supposed to go? How else is she supposed to treat her partner? They need to get their priorities in order, cuz Glory knows where she stands.

Y) Yearn. How long do they pine for their darling before they snap?

Glory takes an interest in the vault dweller from the start, but it’s not until they’ve completed a few missions that she can’t keep them off her mind. The big one was their first mission together. After that, after Sole's badassery and the witty banter they exchanged, she felt inseparable from them. The pair worked so well together, how could she not want to spend every damn mission with them? They fuckin’ killed it together. After that, there was no way she was letting them go out without her, she was stuck on ‘em for good.

Hancock:

H) Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Hancock has a tendency to be a little unpredictable at times, and his possessiveness of Sole would only make his actions more rash. He doesn’t like to take away their freedoms, doesn’t like to take advantage of them; it goes against everything the ghoul stands for. But, he will do what he must to keep them beside him. He’s not cruel to them, he loves his Sole with everything inside of him, but… If anyone should stand between him and them, even if their own actions seek to tear them from him, he won’t tolerate it. He’s patient enough with them, but everyone has a breaking point.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He’s almost unaware of the amount of affection, (physical, verbal, or otherwise) he seems to shower his partner in. It’s just so natural for the ghoul to show his appreciation for them in that way, and though he’s conscious to Sole’s own limits, if Hancock had his way, he’d have his hands on them at all times. Long hugs, wandering hands, deep kisses and just staring in admiration are all almost constant when the ghoul is at his partner’s side. And now that he finally has his way, he always will be.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

Mostly it’s just words of warning for him, especially at first, but as he and Sole spend more time together, he will take away some of their rights as well, if he sees fit. Contact with others is already limited, but anything that Sole usually dabbles in will be cut off for a time, be it alcohol, chems, or free time out in the open. Really though? Most of them are empty threats. Hancock is no softie, he’s killed men for looking at him the wrong way if he felt they deserved it, but for Sole? Well, for them there’s an exception.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Nah, he has no interest in making them more miserable. Just Sole being there with him is enough. Hancock knows he’s not really much of a catch, despite what he tries to present himself as, so he considers that sacrifice enough from Sole. He’ll separate them from others, maybe take away a few of their freedoms if he’s really upset with them, but really, he just wants them, and he loves them more than anything. How could he ever be cruel to the one he cares for so much?

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

As mentioned in H and C, Hancock really doesn’t like to fuck with Sole’s freedoms, it just doesn’t sit right with him, with all that he stands for, all that he preaches. But if it’s absolutely necessary, he’ll take some away as a form of punishment. Really though, the ghoul is content if Sole stays by his side, if they remain his and his alone, that’s all he cares about. He’s never felt this way about anyone before, and certainly never found anyone as good as Sole that wanted him in return, and he’s not risking what they have for anything, even if it means he has to go against his core principles once in a while to keep it that way.

C) -- Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Hancock may be a ghoul, but he’s no monster. He’s not going to force anything on the one he loves. He’s convinced they feel some affection for him, but until they give the word that it’s okay, he won’t go beyond their boundaries physically. He may push some chems their way, or suggest having a drink or two, and he may separate them from anyone else that he knows can’t care for them the way he does, just to make them feel closer to him, feel less inhibitions, but he doesn’t force anything on them.

K) Kisses. How do they act around or with their darling?

Oh, anyone who can see the pair, even from a distance, knows that this ghoul is absolutely head over heels for Sole. If his lips aren’t on them, then his arms are around them. If his arms aren’t around them, then his hands are on them. If his hands aren’t on them, then he can’t tear his ogling gaze from them. He smiles for them, laughs for them, orders their food and drinks, and makes sure they’re always comfortable and safe. Even if Hancock does have to sacrifice his own ideals a bit, if he has to take away some of his partner’s free will, he still ensures that with him, they are well-cared for, that everyone (especially Sole) knows how much he loves them, and how he’d never let anything happen to them, so help him.

Kellogg:

K) Kisses. How do they act around or with their darling?

Kellogg changes quite a bit with time. At first, it’s all about possession. He’s aggressive with his partner, he keeps a wary eye on them, grasps their arm tightly in his grip as they walk, stands much too close for comfort. When they’re intimate, he’s rough with the way he takes them, marking and bruising as he conquers their body with his. 

Later though, as he allows himself to become more disillusioned, he tries to act more like a proper partner, like he was with Sarah… Despite the fact that Sole is only there by force. He knows they despise him, deep down, he’ll always know that, but… Maybe the two of them don’t have to act that way. Maybe Conrad can get some small semblance of that life he knew he never deserved, but that he was so close to having all those years ago. With Sole, maybe he can play family again. Isn’t that something they would want as well? After all they lost? 

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

At first? Not at all. Most days, Kellogg wishes he could forget his own past, Sole has no need to hear that sob story. No, he’s very reserved in the early stages.

When they've 'been together' for awhile, he may start to open up though. Particularly on the softer nights, when they’ve both had a few drinks (Sole more so than him, he’s still worried about them trying to leave him if he lets his guard down), laying beside each other in the afterglow of a union not quite as rough as they used to be, he may let slip something sentimental or sweet about his family from before. While they’re walking around the Commonwealth, he may mumble about some memory of growing up on the west coast, and eventually Sole will have enough information to get a clear picture of his life, but it definitely comes in bits and pieces that they'll need to sort out. 

L) Love Letters. How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

Sole did all the work for him, really. Came right into his clutches, as willingly as one can. Though, maybe they didn’t expect that he’d take such a liking to them. Nor did he, though.

Sole had always intrigued him, from the moment he saw them in their freezer. When he first started thinking about them, it just never stopped. Even when Sole chased him down, when they were spitting and cursing and their face was bunched up into a defiant snarl, that only made him more interested. He couldn’t believe the fight this pre-war suburban family-type had in them. After that meeting, there was no courting, no following them, no second-guessing himself. It ended there.

It was easy, holding their kid over their head like that, holding the information of where the Institute was and how to get there from them, their desperate eyes promising they’d do anything for the knowledge he had. Yes, it was easy after that, and so long as they knew that he had access to their son, that he could reach Shaun and they couldn’t, so long as they knew Kellogg was mad enough not to make idle threats about the safety of their child, Sole simply had to stay by his side. Or else.

L) – (M) Mask. Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Kellogg really is a simple man at heart. He is who he is, as unpleasant as that man may be. If anything, he can sometimes be softer with Sole than he is on the surface, but only when they are bending to his will, allowing him to remain beside them with just the right amount of fight in their actions, submitting, but with their teeth clenched and a glint in their eye, that’s when he chooses to show that softer side. That man that he wasn't, but that he once thought he had the capability to become. Conrad always knew he was a tough fucker, a mercenary, a killer, but when he’d had his family, the people he didn’t deserve, he became disillusioned, thinking his life could be anything but what it is now. Though… with Sole, maybe he can try to pretend once more. If only for a little while.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Most everything. What the hell do they have left to lose, anyway? Everyone they love is gone, everywhere they could go has changed, the world isn’t safe, it isn’t theirs anymore. No, now it’s his. And so are they. Sole has no need for anyone else. Why would they? He can protect them, care for them, keep them in line and off the cruel streets. Hell, maybe one day he’ll even take them to the Institute... Maybe. 

For now though, they stick by his side, they remain with him and have minimal contact with anyone else. They show too much friendliness to some stranger, and Kellogg’s liable to end that conversation in a most gruesome way. What the hell else could they need? Who else could they need? Nah, they’re sticking by him, doing as he says and as he wants until the day their escape is successful, and if it isn’t? Well then, ‘till the day he dies or gets tired of them, whichever comes first. 

G) Game. Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling escape?

He’d like his partner having a bit of fight in them. It’s thrilling in a way, but it’s also… cute, endearing. They really think they have the capability of escaping from him? Really? Fine, let them try, let them realize the hard way that that isn’t the case. Kellogg would like to play their game for a time, mess with their mind, let them think they've gotten away for good this time, and then, at the last second, he’d foil their plans and make it clear that he’s known their intentions as long as they had them in that pretty little head of theirs. Kellogg can be cruel, especially at the beginning. As he grows more attached to his partner though, over time, it becomes less entertaining, less endearing to him, and he’ll put a stop to it, even if he has to take drastic measures. 

G) – H) Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Well, the day they met wasn’t great… Though, there have been some certainly rough days since. Kellogg is a ruthless mercenary, he’s violent and unpredictable, but he’s also remarkably calm. He’d be able to tear Sole’s life to pieces, to cut down any remaining loved ones who might seek to help safeguard them from him, and he’ll do it without so much as blinking an eye. He’s cold, so even when Sole has no other choice but to turn to him for comfort, when Kellogg is all they have left, he’s void of sympathy. That’s the greatest hell of all for Sole. Everything that he took from them, everything he's done to destroy their life, and yet... he will never apologize, never regret what he’s done, at least, as far as they can tell. Kellogg's been through that very same shit, and it hurt, but he made it through, and Sole will too. He'll make sure of that. Whether they want to or not.

MacCready:

M) Mask. Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

MacCready tends to be pretty blatant and honest, but sometimes his actions are more over-exaggerated when he’s with Sole. Though, it’s only because he cares so much. When he was with the gunners, he couldn’t be vulnerable or emotional, he couldn’t talk about Duncan, or Lucy, or his childhood, he had to be as stoic and ruthless as he could, just to fit in with those bastards. Now though, he feels like he can open up, show his true colors to his partner, even if they’re overexaggerated or ugly. That’s what partners are for though, right? They help you to find the best version of yourself, and they put up with the worst. If he can’t be real with them, then he can’t be real at all.

A) Affection. How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

It’s a bit difficult for MacCready to get used to affection again, he hasn’t been intimate in any sort of tender sense with anyone since his late wife, and initiating at first feels like some sort of betrayal.

Later though, as he grows more used to it, once he has that little heart to heart with Sole about their own feelings of guilt regarding their late spouse, MacCready finds it within himself to start being more physically affectionate with his partner. He still is more tentative than most, and so he tends not to force anything on Sole if they’re clear about not wanting it, but if they tolerate him, or even reciprocate, MacCready likes to rest an idle hand on them and steal kisses throughout the day. He’s young, and he’s in love again, so the more comfortable he grows, the more touchy-feely he gets.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

The merc isn’t one to hold back on the occasional mockery, he pokes fun at them, and makes rude comments every once in a while, but he wouldn’t say he’s cruel. If Sole thinks he’s bad, they should’ve seen the gunners, that shi-, that crap was cruel.

He’d be firm about certain rules, and might raise his voice or knock over some inconsequential items in his state of frustration at Sole’s potential lack of compliance, but he wouldn’t hurt them physically. He’s lost one person due to his own negligence, he’s not going to be the cause of hurting, or losing, another. He can’t.

C) -- Fight. How would they feel if their darling fought back?

He’d be frustrated as hell. Why did they feel the need to resist him? He cares about them, they opened up to him, he thought they cared for him too! If that’s the case, why are they being so difficult?! MacCready blames it on their own feelings of guilt. He knows what it’s like to feel bad about being able to move on after losing the one you love, but it’s what their late spouses would’ve wanted, right? Can’t Sole see that? Them being together… it’s what’s right. They’re two sides of the same coin, two halves of a whole, they have so much in common; and he understands their reservations, but they can’t let that part of them win. One day they’ll see it his way, one day they’ll forgive themselves for moving on, and then they can be together, and he’ll never have to worry about them running from him, or refusing him like this again.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

He doesn’t see a reason to feel guilty, they both love each other, right? He’s doing this for both of them. Sole cares for him, they said so, this is what they want, they’re just a little confused right now, but that makes sense. After everything they’ve been through, they just need some time to move past it, MacCready gets it, and he’ll be there with them the whole way through. He knows that every time they come to him, admitting that they’re unhappy, or accusing him of being controlling, it’s really stemming from their own insecurities about their feelings for him, but he can be patient for the one he loves. They just need time.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

MacCready likes opening up to someone. He finally feels like he can, so he’s very vulnerable with them, more so than anyone he’s ever met, ever been with. Sole knows his past better than even Lucy did, and he likes it that way. Maybe if they see the way he opens up to them, how honest he is about his background, about his feelings, they’ll feel more inclined to be honest with him, to open up on their own and let him be there for them, the way they’ve been for him all these months.

A) -- Blood. How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

He’s killed over some of the smallest things. Killed for caps, killed for his family, killed for strangers with a contract, even killed over a spilled drink one bad night; killing for Sole would be easy. Spilling his own blood might be a little more difficult, and he would never put Duncan in harm’s way, but MacCready’s almost died for Sole before, just as they have for him. There’s no bond stronger than one like that, so if it comes to it, he’ll bleed for them, he’d kill for them, and if he thought Duncan was safe, that he would be looked after, MacCready would even die for his Sole.

D) Darling. Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

MacCready has a hard time seeing it as “against their will,” since they were so open with him at the start. Now, he feels as though their hesitation is just a result of their own self-condemnation, and he feels bad for them. He empathizes, he really does, but at some point, they both deserve to move on, to be happy.

Unless Sole is very blatant about Mac crossing a line, he won’t even know he’s doing it, so he may end up taking away a few rights, or doing something Sole doesn’t want without even realizing it. He tries to be considerate of their feelings, but MacCready often deludes himself into thinking they don’t know what they want, or what’s best for them, but he gets it, he’s been there, and he wants to guide them through it, even if at first they seem unhappy. He knows it’ll all be for the best in the end.

Y) Yearn. How long do they pine for their darling before they snap?

He honestly doesn’t think much of Sole at first, just another boss, another job. But maybe there was a little something extra to them…but he’d tried not to linger on it. This was caps, nothing more. After they helped him with the gunners, and he learned more about their past though, he was hooked. The two of them have so much in common, and they’re not an assho-- a jerk, like literally everyone else he’s met in the wasteland (except Lucy). So, how could he not fall for them?

After that, his mind was made up. He made his confession, and they admitted they felt similarly, and that was the happiest day of his life. He had someone to love again, someone to live for by his side, someone who cares about him. All he needed now was Duncan, then they could be happy. And once Sole found Shaun, they could all be a family. It’s everything MacCready's has ever wanted.

Nick:

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

He would mostly give punishments just by taking away some of their freedoms. If they want to act unruly, then he’ll just have to be sure to keep a better eye on them. Nick’s also big on lectures, making Sole feel as though he’s the victim in the situation, for having to deal with their horrible behavior when all he’s trying to do is look out for their safety. Usually he’ll sulk for a bit, and give them an exasperated sigh or two when they speak and after a day he’ll be gracious enough to forgive them. Nick makes it so that Sole doesn’t want to disobey him. Not with violent actions or shouted profanities, but with his own disappointment and clear distaste for their own actions when all he does is look out for their well-being.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Nick has just craved companionship for his entire existence. The flesh and blood Nick had Jenny, and that was the happiest he remembered being, and that wasn’t even him. Helping others brought synth Nick as much joy as he thought he would be capable of, but once he met Sole… What he thought was happiness was just blown out of the water. He wanted to be with them all of the time, didn’t want to lose this feeling, no matter what it takes.

He loves being around them, talking with them, being romantic with them, having the opportunity to feel more human than he ever has, and that’s all he wants. Maybe marriage is in the cards eventually, but if they just remain together, Nick doesn’t need a certificate to prove that he’s in love with them. As long as Sole sticks by him, he couldn’t care less what his future holds. Ideally, he would continue to help people with them as his partner throughout, and they can live a long and happy life together until a time Sole feels like retiring, then he’ll remain by their side until… Well, let’s not think of “untils” quite yet. They have a long way to go until then.

C) Cruelty. How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Nick isn’t a cruel man. He wouldn’t make the situation worse by making life hell for his partner, or by bad-mouthing them for their ignorance or misplaced trust, in truth, he wishes they hadn’t been so kind to him, shown him their capacity to love him, a capacity almost no one else shared. Then, maybe, he could’ve let them be. Now though, he needs them. They’re the only ones he can really relate to, the only ones from his time, the only ones with the capacity to love him despite what he is, and they, their relationship, needs to be protected. They don’t belong out here in the post-apocalyptic Commonwealth, and he wants to provide some semblance of familiarity if he can, to the life they knew before. How can he, out in the open, in the wastes? No, they have to be here for him, with him, if he is going to pull off this trick.

K) Kisses. How do they act around or with their darling?

Nick acts as though nothing is out of the ordinary. Sure, he’s more controlling than most, and Sole doesn’t really have the option to leave him, but he’ll be damned if he doesn’t make them want to stay by his side all of the time regardless. He’s romantic, taking them out to dinner and bringing them flowers, taking long moonlit walks and giving soft kisses in the candlelight. He’s supportive, being the first to help them when they're in need, giving advice and pats on the back, being a shoulder to cry on and their voice of reason.

Nick wants them to be happy. Wants them to feel what he does when he’s with them. He loves Sole more than he thought was possible, and he makes sure they know that. It’s why they can’t leave, after all. After being this happy, after knowing someone so kind, so gentle, someone he can relate to, someone he has the capacity to love, how could he ever choose to be away from them?

Piper:

P) Patience. How patient are they with their darling?

It depends on the day for Piper. For the most part, she tends to be patient with Sole, she loves them and has had plenty of practice with her little sister on being more tolerant, no matter her mood at the time. However, she’s only human. If Piper is having a bad day, she’s bound to be more short with her love than usual. Especially if they are the cause of her rotten mood, Piper might raise her voice with them or take away a few of their privileges, as though they were a child of Nat's age, but she’s not likely to do much more than that.

I) Ideals. What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

Piper has never had an issue with her own independence, or with taking care of Nat on her own, but she does admit, the idea of having a companion to share her life with, one that will stick by her side, who she can depend on under pressure, who understands what it's like to be responsible for someone else's care… That doesn’t sound too bad. She’s not asking for much, she just wants their attention, their presence, their know-how as a parent, their support, then she could imagine herself sharing a life with someone, with Sole. They’re just… They’re perfect. It’s not Piper’s fault that they fit every bit of criteria she had for a romantic partner, so if they don’t like it, she’s sorry, but, people like Sole are impossible to find nowadays, and they just don’t get that, do they?

She doesn’t want much, she just wants them. She wants to be able to have a family, to have someone to navigate this world with, so she can have time to write and focus on her career without having to drag Nat into every little aspect of her life. She wants someone to help her, so that she can help Nat. That’s not too much to ask, is it?

P) -- Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

Maybe she could move on if they just escaped. It’d be difficult, but if they felt that strongly about it, and she never saw them again, Piper could move on. It would take a long time though, and relationships just wouldn’t be in the cards for her anymore. If Sole died though… Man, she would go on, she would have to. For Nat’s sake, but she wouldn’t want to. She’d get even more lost in her writing, maybe have a few years of stories that hardly anyone could decipher, she might even separate herself from Nat, having her sister live with Nick or Ellie for awhile while she sorts herself out, afraid that what she’s become could rub off on the one she loves most, the only one left. Piper couldn’t do that to Nat.

After a few years though, the pain would start to dull. She would still pour herself into her stories, but her research would be well done and well founded now, she would be a bit more stable, and finally she would write her own obituary to the one she loved, before finally letting it go, bringing Nat back to live with her, and making the changes necessary to be the proper role model for her sister. So that Nat will never have to endure the pain of loss that Piper felt, and the regret that still haunts her for her treatment of Sole when they were by her side.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

It takes Piper a long time to open up and show Sole her vulnerable side. She’s really more comfortable at the receiving end of that sort of thing, but she does eventually let them in. The reporter may beat around the bush a bit though, whether she means to or not. It’s just difficult for her to open up too much. If Sole does so a bit on their own, it will prompt her to feel more comfortable more quickly though, and really, she loves talking about Nat.

Opening up about her past allows Piper a moment of distraction from what’s happening between her and Sole. She knows that she cares for them, and she knows their relationship is probably unhealthy, but the more she seeks their comfort, the more she hears about their past and reveals bits of her own, the more she realizes how perfect they are for one another.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

She would regret it, and some nights when she knows they're unhappy, when they open up and are honest with her, she may come close to letting them go. But then she thinks about it. About how perfect they are, how they’re everything she’s ever needed in a partner, how she'll never be able to find someone that compares to them, how they met and felt that instant connection, how Sole woke from their ice nap at this exact year, this exact time, just so they could meet her. There’s no way all of that could be by coincidence, and Piper can’t let them slip away, not when it’s so clear they’re meant to be together.

Preston:

P) Patience. How patient are they with their darling?

He tends to be very patient with them. In all honesty, Preston is patient with everyone, and his darling is certainly no exception. However, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t lose it occasionally with them. The minuteman’s checkered past has left him with a temper in his moments of desperation, and there are certain actions that Sole may take that he will not put up with. If they become violent towards him, or any innocent people, he won’t be happy.

Generally his show of impatience comes with the accompaniment of a raised voice and, if they really push him, a physical response, such as striking a wall or kicking at some junk he found on the ground. He would never hurt Sole, or anyone else unless they were being dangerous, and it really takes a lot for him to get to the point of shouting, despite all he’s been through, but he will go there, if he feels he must.

R) Regret. Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let them go?

All the time. Every day he would consider whether or not what he did was in their best interest, or only in his. If they expressed unhappiness, he would feel extraordinarily guilty, and would constantly second-guess his own actions towards them, and the way he restricts their freedoms in a way he knew was wrong. But Sole saved him. Until he repays their debt he can’t leave their side, and even then…

They make him so happy, he loves them, and feels as though he can’t live without them. He wished he didn’t go to such drastic measures, but he’s never loved anything like he loves Sole, and if he lost them… Preston doesn’t think he could move on from that.

E) Exposed. How much of their heart do they bear to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

He tries to be honest with them, hoping his sincerity and desperation keeps them “willingly” by his side (don’t tell him that that’s manipulation). So, he often lets them know how important they are to him, how he couldn’t live without them, he’s honest about his past experiences and struggles, and he always makes sure they know that without their aid, he never would have made it out of Concord, or out of the spiral of guilt and grief that followed Quincy.

S) Stigma. What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc.)?

Sheer desperation, and the need to survive. Preston knows that his behavior is unhealthy, that his dependency on his partner isn’t fair, but he doesn’t know what else to do. All he knows is that without Sole, he would be dead. So they have to stay by his side, it’s an instinct, it’s a necessity, a survival tactic, he doesn’t know where it came from, but he knows he needs Sole in his life, whether it’s healthy or not. He feels horrible, and maybe one day things will change, but for now, this feels like the only option in the world.

T) Tears. How do they feel about seeing their darling scream/cry/or isolate themselves?

It breaks his heart. Most nights he catches them like this, Preston curls up at their side (if they let him) and pulls them in tight, shedding his own tears and spilling a slew of apologies to them as he holds them close and wipes their cheeks dry with a gentle hand. He doesn’t want this either, doesn’t want to hurt them, and he doesn’t understand how he could make someone he loves this much, so incredibly unhappy. He wishes there was another way, and he tells them this, even as his grip tightens on their body at the thought of losing them.

O) Oppression. How many rights would they take away from their darling?

Preston just wants them by his side. As long as they are helping the people of the Commonwealth, taking their responsibilities as General into account, and he’s with them, the minuteman is satisfied. That’s all he requires. Sole can speak to others, they can go where they please, eat and drink what they wish, take rests whenever they want, he just needs to be there with them through it all.

N) Naughty. How would they punish their darling?

He wouldn’t, he couldn’t. Guilt trips are his only form of ammunition against his love. If Sole leaves him, they may never see him again. They are his will to live, wrapped up in one gorgeous person is his entire willpower to keep going; if they leave, they take that willpower with them. Their only punishment is living with their decision if they leave him, living with the consequences, living without him.

X6-88:

X) Xoanon. How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

X6 thinks Sole is just about the best thing that’s happened to the Institute since Shaun arrived and they began the process of creating Gen 3 Synths. He reveres them more than he has anyone else and is more devoted to them than he would ever like to admit. But romance-wise, he’s not sure he’s a good fit for Sole. He’s not even human, how could he ever care for them properly, in the way the director of the Institute deserves? He struggles with it for a long time before deciding that he cannot rest until Sole is his. Whatever they need, he has the ability to provide, all he needs are the proper circumstances and he believes he does have the capacity to be what is best for them.

6) -- Fight. How would they feel if their darling fought back?

It would annoy him more than anything. X6 is fully capable of restraining them, and Sole is aware of this. Why they would try to escape him, he doesn’t know; and why they would put in the effort to actually fight him on it, he can’t pretend to understand, but X6 will be able to put an end to it soon enough. He’ll make it known to them how ridiculous it is that they are trying to fight back, in both the way he easily seems to manhandle them, and in the way his unamused voice growls out in warning.

8) -- Hell. What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

X6 doesn’t tolerate anyone else taking up Sole’s attention. As far as he’s concerned, if you’re not the Institute, Shaun, or himself, you have no right to occupy Sole’s space physically or mentally. His control will go so far as to remove these human obstacles from the equation of Sole’s life. Permanently, if need be.

8) -- Stigma. What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc.)?

The courser has had little to no reference for proper societal behavior for his entire existence. He’s not meant to have the feelings that Sole inspires, he’s never felt them before, and he has no idea how he’s meant to react, but if X6 is anything, he’s intense, and absolutely relentless. He puts his everything into whatever he’s doing, it’s what he’s always done, always been encouraged to do, so why would now be different?

A part of him understands that what he’s doing, how he’s acting, isn’t normal, and it certainly isn’t proper, given that he’s a synth and Sole is human. A very important human, at that, but he feels so strongly about Sole, he doesn’t know how else to express it. Even if it is wrong, if acting otherwise means giving up Sole, X6 doesn’t want to be right.

[goudasnew]

Ooo I like pairing up my own characters for no reason! Imma pick the ones stuck in my head rn and of course I haven't shown some of them so I'll describe what their deal is. (I will soon its just that they change every two seconds 😔😔)

1. Wanda- A nonbinary witch who's a private investigator tasked in finding a missing Whitaker coven member. (They're the one on my icon)

2. Lorelei- A mercenary for hire evoker who left the mansion along with her brother after she was left for dead by their group after saving her brother from a creeper explosion.

3. Clay- A mercenary for hire vindicator who followed behind his sister when she left despite working so hard to climb the ranks.

4. Myra

5. Phyllis

6. Brian

1. #4 and #2 are on their honeymoon and run into a friend staying in the same place. Do they spend time with the friend or ignore them in favour of romance?

Omg Myra and Lorelei??!- In canon there's crazy one sided pinning on Lorelei's side and Myra doesn't entertain her advances cause they're still mourning Brian, so the fact that they got married in this scenario is crazy to me.

Myra's wouldn't necessarily spend time with the friend but would offer a simple "hello" and "how are you?" And excuse herself to continue whatever plans she and Lorelei would have had. Lorelei doesn't have any friends so meeting and socializing a bit with Myra's friends doesn't harm anyone in her opinion.

2. Which is cuddlier, #1 or #5?

Wanda and Phyllis- Definitely Phyllis, Wanda is very touch adverse so the stars would of had to align perfectly for them to even want to cuddle at all.

3. What is #3 and #6's favourite makeout spot?

Clay and Brian?!- Clay would neverrr, anyways they're both really romantic so the place would be kind of cliche. Think something like under a tree right next to a river, moonlit and under the stars type of area.

4. Which is the big spoon and which is the little spoon, out of #5 and #4?

Phyllis and Myra- fun fact they had a brief romance until they decided they were better of as friends.

They would often disagree on who was little spoon, often so that they wouldn't even cuddle at all. The only thing that would settle their disagreements would be the other promising to do a random task of the other's choosing.

5. Who is the better cook, #3 or #2?

Clay and Lorelei- So glad this question is platonic cause these two are related.

Man neither of them. You'd be lucky if you got anything edible from either of them.

6. Who asks who out first, #6 or #1?

Brian and Wanda- Interesting.

Wanda is very dense and also aromantic, so Brian would be the one to ask them out only for the answer to be, "No".

Small randomized pairing game!

Write down six characters without looking at the questions, do your best to answer all six questions, and tag a few people.

Keep reading

[tryingtimi]

Kiss me then | Aka #FridayKiss Tag Game

Thank you for the tag @aninkwellofnectar! ❤️ This seemed like a fun game, so I'll join with a Cronyl and Avelyn first kiss scene, which I wrote quite a long time ago and I'm kind of cringing over it, but oh well. I have only this one and I insist on joining lol. Prepare for the softest, mushiest, victiorian-era couple vibes. I'm not exaggerating.

Rules are that you post a smooch between your OCs for Friday. It can be as light as a peck or intense as a makeout. It can be romantic or platonic or familial. As long as a smooch takes place it’s free reign! Tagging: @writingonesdreams, @bloodlessheirbyjacques, @jess-p-edits (I crave that Krieve x Jaisse moment), @aschlindartroom, @moonscribbler, @friendlyneighborhood-writer, @the-void-writes, @circa-specturgia and everyone who wants to join.

“Well, I’m not sure how to do this right.”

Avelyn thought she was used to Cronyl’s straightforwardness, but she could feel her blush appearing on her face. Her feelings were known and requited. They confessed. Yet, she had not thought through how things would continue on.

Cronyl clearly never had any romantic relationships in the past, however experienced he was in life in general. Even though Avelyn was sure he knew how to, well, do things in it. Still, this was the first time they were completely together since they officially became a couple and he only looked at her patiently with those intense, yet somehow soft eyes…

Oh, Veilnieve. He wants me to tell him specifics?

Avelyn let her feelings soften her gaze and a gentle, genuine smile find her lips.

“A hug is a good start, I think,” she said.

“Right.”

He nodded absent mindedly while he looked around. Searching for something? Avelyn felt confused washing over her as he took her hand, but she let herself be pulled over to the wall anyway. When only a small distance stayed between them and the wall, Cronyl stopped and turned to her. His eyes were piercing with their uniqueness as always, but now hesitance reflected in a ray of light that hit them.

“Could you sit down then?”

She cocked her head to the side. Is a hug not as simple as she thought? Nevertheless, she did as she was asked and sat down, back facing the wall.

Maybe he was frustrated because she didn’t move?

Cronyl walked behind her, so she couldn’t see what he was doing, but a second later two pulled up legs cornered her on each side. Two gentle arms followed them, embracing her carefully while Cronyl’s body pressed to her softly from behind.

Avelyn’s blush deepened into a rich crimson. So this is why he was reluctant. She didn’t understand his intention. Oh, well.

A chuckle bubbled up in her throat when she felt his chin resting on the top of her head. What a strange and still reserved way to hug her? By the sights, Cronyl felt like a different person entirely. She could never imagine him being this gentle with only a hug. She misunderstood him so very much, didn’t she?

Before he could have gotten the wrong idea, she rested her hands on his, caressing the skin softly and leaned more into the embrace. He held her a little tighter, arms interlocking on her stomach. So appropriate.

It felt unreal.

Avelyn imagined something like this, but never this intimate. This idyllic. This natural. She wanted to be closer to him, but there was no chance for that. She could already feel his heartbeat from his chest that pressed to her back. It was calm and content; just like her’s.

“This is nice.”

He pulled his legs higher and somehow Avelyn closer. She could feel him putting his head on her shoulder, the skin of their faces touching.

Avelyn hummed a response because that was the only thing she could squeeze out of herself. Her blush burnt into her cheeks as she realized she wanted more.

Cronyl obviously wanted to do everything at her pace, and that just made Avelyn fell harder. Her heart overflowed with such an intense love that she never imagined. He trusted her so deeply, he gave her the ultimate control over this.

No-one ever trusted her this much.

Silent minutes passed, when she felt him grow tense a bit for some reason she didn’t know. However, when she turned her head to face him, Cronyl hesitantly looked away.

“You told me before that, if I can’t tell, then show you how I feel…” He paused for a moment. “And I never did.”

She turned a little with her body, forcing him to separate his hands around her. It already felt wrong not to be fully embraced by him.

“You’re showing me now.”

She wanted to look into his eyes – those magnificent eyes –, but he did not lift his gaze at her yet. His face did not show embarrassment or nervousness. He seemed only someone who is deep in thought.

“I’m not sure I do. It’s an unspeakable feeling to hold you in my arms. Yet… Somehow what I feel for you is so much more.”

Avelyn was sure she would have cried already if she heard this months ago. Her chest felt full of a myriad of feathered winged butterflies, her mind carved this moment into her memory.

She knew now he felt the exact same as her. He told her.

Oh, how things changed in the matter of time?

“Kiss me then.” she breathed quitely, a tiny, gentle smile finding her lips.

Cronyl looked at her. Intense gaze never leaving her eyes again. His face loosened up, tenderness conquering his whole body. There was no hesitation anymore.

He leaned in, and Avelyn’s breath caught up in her throat while she did the same. When their lips met, everything just fell into place. Cronyl brought up a hand to place on her cheek, gently, lovingly. Their kiss wasn’t particularly short and as much as it was full of passion, Avelyn couldn’t hold back a little smile how reserved he was the whole time. Yes, it wasn’t a short kiss, but she felt it that way, even though she was a little out of breath when they parted.

As her eyelids opened, she could see Cronyl’s always serious eyes watching her. With a still strangely calm, yet full heart, she leaned in the touch of his hand.

And Cronyl smiled then. A tiny, half-smile, that showed everything.

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Dating Todd and Neil would include~

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

- There’s two meeting options for the boys that I see as being particularly plausible. 1) You’re dating one of them; most likely Neil, and they find out that the other likes you, or 2) you’re dating one of them and notice their obvious attraction to each other so you suggest that maybe they just want to be together and they both decide no<3. 

- So, either way, you’ll be dating one of them and getting another one free of charge!

- Both of your boys love affection but Todd is definitely a bit uncomfortable with pda whereas Neil is almost always touching you; particularly when you’re in public since he likes keeping you close to him. So, to the untrained eye, Neil is going to be your boyfriend and Todd, just a close friend. 

- Todd’s kisses tend to be softer than Neil’s. Neil is usually more enthusiastic and playful when he kisses you while Todd usually takes his time and gives you kisses that; oftentimes, make you want to smash your lips to his. 

- Being moved from kiss to kiss during makeout sessions. Usually, Todd will be kissing you first and when the two of you part, Neil will be right there to tilt/move your face and kiss you himself. 

- Neil’s arms are around both your shoulders; yours and Todd's, constantly. It looks platonic to people who don't know about the three of you but it isn’t. 

- Todd usually holds your hands more than he wraps his arms around you. He’ll usually do it in private or when he can somewhat hide it but everyone knows that he’s a bit of a nervous wreck so they’re less likely to question the fact that you’re holding your “best friend”; and “your boyfriends best friend”s, hand in public. 

- Todd blushes whenever one of you kisses him, particularly when you’re in front of the other as though they’re not used to seeing it happen. Neil tends to be the one that makes him the most flustered since he’ll just duck down and give him one when he’s all excited and won’t even notice the way the boy turns red and looks at him like he hung the moon. 

- That being said, you’re a pretty girl kissing him so you’re bound to get some sort of flustered reaction; particularly when you kiss him for seemingly no reason at all. 

- Neil definitely pulls you into a makeout session when Todd insists that he’s “too busy” to hang out because he “has to study” or something similar. He likes to mess with him and give him some incentive to “take a break”; especially since he knows his excuse is bullshit and that he’s just too shy. It was more common at the start of your relationship for obvious reasons. 

- Both of these poor little fools are touch starved so please just show them love. Todd will literally act like a neglected puppy and lean into your hand with closed eyes whenever you touch his face and Neil will completely melt into your hugs 90% of the time.

- I mean, you’re sneaking into the room anyways, right? It’s only convenient to date the two of them. 

- Squeezing to fit in their tiny dorm beds, or taking turns cuddling with each other every night. 

- Neil is generally unbothered by the two of you hanging out without him but Todd doesn’t really like it unless your time is spent evenly between them. He doesn’t mind if you spend time with the boy alone; obviously you’re going to do that, but he does feel a bit neglected if you spend a lot more time with Neil. 

- Going to the cave together. They might not tell you about the society but they’ll most likely bring you to the secret spot just to hang out. 

- Sneaking out at night to go into town. I can picture it now, the three of you laughing, your breath foggy in the freezing night air and their cheeks and ears an adorable red from the cold. 

- Diner dates. 

- Going to book stores. It’s mainly for Todd but the atmosphere is nice so you and Neil don’t mind. 

- All of you steal each others sweaters but Neil is the one who usually finds himself missing all of his. 

- Todd raises his hands in surrender with a smile whenever Neil is teasing you and you look to him for help. He likes when you give him a cute little look or lightly shove him.

- Spending your holidays together. 

- Making special birthdays for your boys because they certainly don’t get them from anyone or anywhere else. Neil and you try your best to make the day really special for Todd because you know what usually ends up happening. 

- If you don’t go to Welton, they definitely sit together and craft up the perfect letter or peer edit their separate letters to you. 

- Todd is definitely really embarrassed when showing Neil the poetry he’s written about you but Neil thinks it’s adorable, and you find the stuff he’s written about Neil adorable so you both always insist that he has to give it to the other person. 

- Now Todd has someone to cling to in all stressful scenarios!

- Neil will go out and do his extrovert things and you’ll hang out with Todd. Don’t get him wrong, Todd loves your relationship and wouldn’t change it for the world but he definitely misses moments like those when you haven’t had them for a while. 

- Don’t get me wrong, you love your boys, but Jesus Christ they need to get a room. They’re so in love that it makes you sick.

- Its the 60s so you certainly aren’t telling anyone about your relationship but the poets probably find out because they catch you and Todd kissing and immediately just assume you’re cheating on your boyfriend: Neil. So they tell “your real boyfriend” and Neil has to somewhat awkwardly explain. Charlie will probably ask to join in and Knox will smack his arm.

- Neil doesn’t get jealous very often but Todd does so you and Neil will comfort and assure him or deal with it for the boy when they notice he’s feeling bad and is too shy to go over and see things for himself.

- Whenever they get into an argument about something, Neil has a tendency to get you involved, like saying “Well fine. Come on y/n.”, expecting you to do whatever it is with him if Todd won’t, so you’ll be torn between the two. If you don’t choose him, Neil will get upset with you too and sort of spitefully say “Fine then, stay with him. What do I care?” with a poorly concealed betrayed smile/laugh. 

- You try your best to smooth things over between them since they both sort of have a soft spot for you but Neil is pretty good at coming back in his own time. He’ll walk into the dorm as you’re sitting with Todd on the boys bed and pause before going over and leaning down to give you a kiss. Then, he’ll lean over you and give the other boy a kiss as well, basically saying no hard feelings. 

- Neil says he loves you very easily while Todd is more reserved so while you enjoy hearing it from both, it’s definitely more of a treat when you hear Todd say it. They both love hearing you say it as well, though you’ll have to say it to both if you’re in the same room. 

- The three of you just enjoy being kids and wandering around and doing as you please with each other without the fear of disappointing your parents.

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

*throws this onto the tumblr and then collapses*

GOD

THIS TOOK SO MUCH LONGER THAN I THOUGHT I’M SO SORRY

SO ANYWAYS y’all remember when I said I owed everyone an Elimetri car makeout sesh on the homoerotic Mexico road trip, due to the gi-throwing business in 4x10 necessitating more Elimetri-Keenry parallels (I think in this post here)??? WELL, I was listening to the song Robby and Tory smooched to (this one, if you’re curious) and realized that, hilariously, it’s also an Elimetri song--hence the inspiration for this chapter! I’m doubling down on the car makeout parallels in every possible way and rest assured I have NO shame about it.

As always, big thank you to @xgardensinspace​ for helping with Spanish translations, the names of local flora and fauna, and giving me the idea of  having Demetri find his own Bird Alter Ego! XD Also for informing me that there are an abundance of mangrove trees right around Demetri and Eli’s makeout spot, thus for better or for worse re-awakening my Rabid Ecology Nerd tendencies and making me feel the need to include them in the plot in some way XD

So someone in the Elimetri fandom mentioned they had a headcanon about Kyler knowing the binary boys since kindergarten, so I took that and rolled with it. Mans has been terrorizing our favorite gay nerds since grade school, and has no intention of stopping anytime soon!

Also trust me when I say that The Incident they talk about really is not too far off from how American elementary schools handle bullying...or at least how mine did -______- Like these bitch ass teachers will really have the audacity to say they “don’t care who started it” and then punish kids for retaliating to defend themselves, it’s insane

Some references to the Eli-looking-at-Demetri’s-lips scene in 2x09 because MY GOD like HOW do you explain that in a heterosexual way??? Like it’s such a bizarre acting choice if that scene was meant to be entirely platonic??? Like it absolutely read like Demetri was about to suck it up and finally tell Eli how he felt and Eli was like. Kinda down for it. If only Moon being nearby hadn’t fooled Eli into thinking he was Still Straight and dashed Dem’s hopes ;______;

Welp I really wanted to get this chapter out before S5 dropped, because it’s very saucy and that’s what the lads deserve, so...mission accomplished, I guess? XD

Quick disclaimer that I don’t mean SAUCY saucy because I am asexual af and have no desire to write straightuplegitexplicitsmut, but...this is defs the chapter where the sexy talk is the most blatant and direct lmaoooo

Anyways, read on for a deeper look at Eli’s vendetta against dioramas, another peek into Demetri and Yasmine’s doomed fling, and Demetri coming to a rather alarming realization!

Chapter 1: Here

Chapter 2: Here

Chapter 3: Here

Chapter 4: Here

Chapter 5: Here

All 5 previous chapters are also posted on my AO3, SummerPhlox!

Be warned, this chapter is a longboi!!! 9000+ words because I apparently have no chill! D:

***

The dashboard is warm against Demetri’s arms as he leans into it, the poor plastic still recovering from being cooked by desert sun all day. Sighing, he gazes out past the edge of the parking lot.

It isn’t a bad view. A tangle of fern-leaved green shrubs on the edge of the hill, a scraggly magenta bougainvillea tree, and the sprawling ocean beyond. It’s turning a paler blue as the sun lowers in the sky, sending golden ripples across the water.

Quite the spectacular luck they found this place. The GPS took them on some hilly backroad while trying frantically to avoid highway traffic, and they ended up stumbling on an empty parking lot right on the precipice of an overlook. Probably for a national park or something—if Mexico had national parks, anyhow.

In any case, no one seems interested in admiring out-of-the-way views or taking secluded hikes at 8 pm. He and Eli have the place to themselves.

Demetri shakes his head. “I cannot believe we made it here before sundown, with all the detours we took today.”

“Demetri, we took one detour. For, like, an hour.” He glances over to see his friend giving him an annoyed look.

“But we didn’t leave until 9 this morning,” Demetri retorts. “Per your request, I might add.”

“And yet here we are.” Eli smirks. “In Mazatlán, watching a beach sunset with no one to bother us. How do you find things to complain about when there isn’t anything to complain about?”

“Oh, I’m not complaining. I’m just shocked is all.” He whistles. “I must have been speeding on those highways more than I thought.”

Eli snickers. “Demetri the law-defying daredevil. Never thought I’d see the day.”

“Well, we haven’t gotten any enigmatic Spanish tickets yet. Why would we start now?”

To his surprise, Demetri finds himself easily smirking back. Some of his usual paranoia must be on vacation right now.

Eli’s eyes flick out the passenger window, and Demetri follows his gaze. Just past the bluff, the city sprawls out below them, yellow lights starting to blink on as the day fades.

It’s Eli’s turn to look concerned. His brow knits, and he glances back at Demetri.

“You sure we’ll find a hotel?”

“Oh, please.” Demetri rolls his eyes. “Half the people who come here this time of year are the lazy, irresponsible beach bum tourist type. You think they’re going to have the foresight to make hotel reservations?”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

“We’ll be fine. I mean, we’re not staying in the Hilton or anything, but there’s some run-down ‘luxury hotel’ on every corner here.”

“Fair enough.”

Eli leans back in his seat, body slumping as he exhales.

A small, stilt-legged bird flutters over the bluff, landing on one of the scraggly bougainvillea branches. The creature fluffs up pale brown and white feathers as he begins to prune, nibbling at himself with a long, needle-like bill.

His head flicks up, catching sight of the car with tiny, dark eyes. The bird does not take the news well. He bobs his neck and tail up and down, letting out a series of shrill, high-pitched chirps not unlike chihuahua yaps. Even with rolled-up car windows, the bird’s infuriated cries refuse not to be heard.

“Hey, look.” Eli sniggers. “It’s you as a bird.”

“What!” Demetri scoffs. “How?!”

Eli shrugs. “Gangly. Neck too long. Weird, fussy neat freak. Loud. Never shuts up. Jerks every which way while never shutting up.”

“I do not jerk every which way when I talk!” Demetri insists, practically banging the back of his hands on the steering wheel as he frantically gestures to prove his point.

Eli breaks out laughing. “You just did!”

“That doesn’t count! That was very coordinated movement!”

“You…almost smacked both your hands at once.”

“But I didn’t!”

Outside, the bird continues to squawk away, as if the sound’s power can send the unwanted car careening back toward the huisache and fern-encrusted hillside across the road.

“He really won’t shut his mouth, huh?” Eli clicks his tongue. “The resemblance is uncanny.”

Demetri rolls his eyes, shooting his friend a searing look. “In any case,” he mutters. “I can’t believe we’re getting into a game of chicken with a fucking shorebird.”

“Good story for Miguel, at least.” Eli smirks. “I can’t wait to tell him all about the time Human Demetri lost to Bird Demetri.”

“Oh, I am not losing this one,” Demetri growls. He leans against the steering wheel and glares out at the lanky bird, now marching back and forth on ridiculous bright yellow legs.

“At least after a while you can tune him out,” Eli says. “Just like your subpar—”

Demetri punches his arm before he can finish, and Eli bursts out laughing again.

The bird continues to yap away, patrolling the tree branch and shooting them dirty looks. After the creature seems to finally accept he cannot rid himself of the humans and their great metal beast, he gives one last defiant fluff of his wings and flutters away.

“Seems like that’s a win for Human Demetri, Eli,” Demetri says smugly, crossing his arms. His friend sneers disapprovingly, but doesn’t argue.

Not far off, a flock of shorebirds is traversing the bay, yellow stilt legs dangling underneath them. Demetri catches glimpses of flickering wings glowing white and amber in the dying sunlight. The bird from the bougainvillea tree sweeps off in their direction, squawking a greeting as he goes.

“Ah, shit.” Eli leans against the dashboard, eyes suddenly eager. “If there’s that many shorebirds around here, there’s probably mangroves, too.”

“Mangroves?” Demetri raises his eyebrows. “Are those fair game to talk about again?”

“Why wouldn’t they b—you think I’m still pissed about the 4th grade diorama project?!” Eli’s buzzed head whips around to glare at him, blue eyes genuinely offended. “I’m not a fucking baby! That shit was years ago. I’m over it.”

“I just figured. Ya know.” Demetri makes a face. “Bad association?”

Eli rolls his eyes. “Maybe for you. I’m 17, Demetri—I’m not gonna bawl over a swamp tree the way I did when I was 10.”

Demetri scoffs. Eli’s slipped into the old habit of being prickly and difficult when he doesn’t want to open up, and Demetri’s not having it. If Eli wants to hide away in a stone-walled cave, then Demetri supposes he’ll have to grab a pickaxe and play some fucking Minecraft.

He groans, leaning against the back of the driver’s seat. “For years you aggressively changed the subject every time that whole thing came up. You think I didn’t notice?!”

Eli snorts. “Did not! You’re insane, dude. I was normal about it—you were the one who kept being weird.”

“Oh, sure.” Demetri rolls his eyes, grievously unconvinced. “That’s absolutely how it was. And anyways, you ‘bawled’ because Kyler was being a fucking jackass, Eli. You have to stop talking like you’re some kind of weakling for getting upset about…something that would upset any reasonable person.”

Eli frowns, gaze fixed on the now-empty bougainvillea. “It was embarrassing. I broke down in front of everyone.”

“Who wouldn’t?! You worked your ass off on that thing!”

“Yeah, and crying sure brought it back, didn’t it?” Eli sneers. Though he’s scowling, something in his expression is pained. “Just rebuilt the whole damn diorama after Kyler flushed all the mangroves and the plastic crabs and shit down the toilet.”

“You spent hours making those trees,” Demetri recalls. “Out of model magic. I’d never seen you look so concentrated.”

His friend shrugs, not meeting his eyes. “I wanted them to be accurate. I remember I read they can do this like…saltwater filtration thing through their roots, and I thought that was the coolest shit. Did this crazy deep dive into the chemistry of it. I wanted all the roots to be linked up and tangled like they actually are.”

“Complicated and intricate. Just like whatever’s going on in here.” Demetri thumps Eli on the side of the head, and his friend groans.

“It was a really good diorama, you know.” Demetri smiles weakly. “Probably the best in the class.”

Eli stares vacantly at the glove box. “And then Kyler happened,” he mumbles.

Demetri lets out a dry, humorless laugh. “And then Kyler happened,” he confirms wearily.

Scarred knuckles work against the fabric of the car seat, scratching into it with short nails. “God. I was so excited for that stupid presentation, too.”

“Oh, I know.” Demetri smiles, remembering the feeling of sun-warmed window glass against his cheek as Eli’s eager little voice filled the car. “You wouldn’t shut up about it the whole ride to school.”

“I put it down for two seconds.” Eli clenched a fist. “To get some shit out of my backpack, or…I d’know. The damn bell hadn’t even rung by the time that stupid fuck was running off with it.”

“I never thought he’d be that bold,” Demetri grumbles, folding his arms and resting his chin on the steering wheel. “I should’ve predicted it. Given you a head’s up before homeroom or something.”

“Wasn’t your fault. I was the one who wasn’t looking. But…” He takes a sharp breath, eyes flashing. “Didn’t feel any less shitty. All those fucking trees, into the sewer.”

“And after your dad 3D-printed all those little blue plastic bases, too,” Demetri laments. “To make it look like the roots were underwater. It was the coolest thing.”

Eli turns and gives him a steaming look, and he raises his hands in surrender. “Sorry, sorry, I’m not helping. Still working on regulating that good ol’ brain-to-mouth tract.”

His friend copies his posture, slumping onto the dashboard. “He got everything but the shorebirds.”

“Everything but the shorebirds,” Demetri repeats wistfully. “They fell out on the way to the bathroom. I picked a few of them up.”

“They weren’t like the one outside, though,” Eli adds, glancing at the empty tree branch where “bird Demetri” had been. “They were like…herons or some shit. I spent hours getting one to perch on the big tree in the middle. Then I had to just awkwardly lay it down on that easter basket stuff we used as eelgrass.”

“Well, they lost their habitat,” Demetri says, shrugging. “And the rest of their ecosystem. You unintentionally created a poignant commentary on the dangers of deforestation.”

Eli sniggers. “Still can’t believe you tried to convince Mrs. Hardass Anderson that that was intentional.”

Demetri winces slightly at the memory. “I really thought it would work. I remember I’d just gotten that disposable camera, and I was taking pictures of everything. I had every angle on your project known to man in there, and every single one of them got shoved in her face while I was insisting those were the ‘before’ pics in some kind of ‘before and after’ thing.”

He’s fairly sure he was also holding the bawling, 10-year-old Eli’s hand the entire time, since only one hand was needed to practically cram his disposable camera up their teacher’s nose. He has a feeling Eli would not appreciate him mentioning that part.

He frowns, looking away. “And then Kyler walks in…”

Eli scoffs. “The teacher aide lady overheard him bragging about flushing half my diorama and knew you were full of shit. She was such a bitch about it, too.”

“It was outrageous!” Demetri throws his hands in the air. “She gave me this huge lecture about how terrible it was to ‘cover’ for your friend’s bully, and shame on me for not telling the truth about what Kyler did! Like tattling on him did any good the last sixteen times I tried it.”

Eli shrugs, not meeting Demetri’s eyes. “At least she gave me a passing grade. I probably would’ve failed if you hadn��t said anything. And if you snitched on Kyler, he would’ve given both of us black eyes.”

Demetri shakes his head, lip curling in disgust. “Gotta love that lecture I heard her giving him later. ‘Kyler Park, you need to show more respect for your classmates! This is unacceptable behavior and not at all in line with the West Valley Elementary Code of Conduct!’”

Eli bursts out laughing as Demetri raises his voice into a high-pitched squawk. “Oh my god. Is that really all he got? Or did they call an emergency parent-teacher conference?”

“Worse.” Demetri smirks. “Principal Holloway assigned him a take-home anti-bullying workbook.”

Eli gawks at him. “No fucking way.”

“Yes fucking way.” He grins smugly. “I heard the popular kids whispering about it when they thought the ‘weird loser freaks’ weren’t paying attention. Apparently he poured orange juice all over the first two, and only filled out the third one when they threatened his recess privileges.”

“Oh, god.” Eli winced. “That does explain why he cracked down on making us miserable after that.”

Demetri nods solemnly. “Truly nothing motivates Kyler Park like good old-fashioned revenge. If he could, I’m guessing he’d pour seventeen more bottles of Pepto Bismol over Miguel’s head.”

“You know…” Eli grins slyly. “Principal Holloway and Counselor Blatt would get along. They should hook up.”

Demetri scowls, making a face as Eli bursts out laughing. “Okay, you’re right, but fuck you for making me think about Counselor Blatt having sex.”

Eli only laughs harder. “Your mind went there, dude, not mine! Get your brain out of the gutter, Demetri.”

“You suggested it!”

“Only because it’d be the funniest shit. Like…I don’t want to think about it either, but I do wonder how that would work.”

Demetri scoffs. “What would their foreplay even be? ‘Oooooh baby, tell me about your 20-step plan to combat cyberbullying in youths!’”

As his voice rises into a nasal squeak, Eli is laughing so hard he’s struggling for breath. Soon Demetri is laughing too, breaking into giggles before he can even finish his next Counselor Blatt impression.

As the laughter dies down, Demetri shakes his head, tears in his eyes. “Look on the bright side, Eli. I’ll bet the West Valley Elementary plumbing system suffered dearly from Kyler’s hijinks. Mrs. Anderson probably had to shit at home for days.”

“Oh my god.” Eli snorts. “I do wonder what the sewage treatment plant guys thought when all that stuff showed up.”

“I mean…it’s an elementary school, Eli. I’m sure that’s far from the weirdest thing kids have flushed into oblivion. I heard Jake Manson say he flushed a hot glue gun once.”

Eli sniggers. “Yeah, that tracks. Wonder whatever happened to that guy.”

Demetri sighs sadly. “Heard he got wrapped up in some pyramid scheme and lost his water polo scholarship.”

Eli hums thoughtfully. “Somehow very on-brand for him.”

Demetri gazes out the windshield. As the last of the sun lingers on the horizon, the ocean starts to darken to a deep, hazy teal, broken only by streaks of white wave caps breaking around distant islands. He smirks, suddenly realizing something.

“Eli…?”

“Hm?”

“Did you destroy my earth sciences model because you figured diorama-smashing was just what big, bad, scary bullies did? Or were you trying to avenge your mangroves, and forgot for a moment what dojo their murderer was in?”

“That’s not why I—HEY! Quit laughing!”

Demetri does not quit laughing.

“I’m sorry, it’s just—‘oooooh, Hawk Moskowitz, thrower of soccer balls, destroyer of dioramas! The height of avarice and malevolence! No more will he be the recipient of such terrible crimes against environmental models, you see—the tables have turned, and now he will be the one sending every last creature and plant and landform in his enemies’ meticulous and work-intensive project to an untimely death!’”

“Holy shit, Dem.” Despite his best efforts, Eli is laughing again. “You’re such a fucking weirdo.”

“Well, I’m glad you finally got some revenge for the fallen mangrove diorama.” Demetri leans over and swats Eli’s shoulder. “Your target may have been a little off, but I’m sure all those 3D-printed tree bases still appreciate it, from somewhere in the Los Angeles sewer system.”

“I guess it did feel nice to wreck a diorama,” Eli admits, cheeks flushing.

“And thus the destroyee becomes the destroyer!” Demetri crows. “The cycle is complete!”

For a long while they sit there laughing, barely wheezing anything out between cackles. When Demetri’s aching sides demand he stop, he glances over at Eli.

To his surprise, his friend has gone quiet. He’s frowning and staring forlornly at the dashboard, all traces of amusement gone.

Guilt twists in Demetri’s stomach.

“Hey,” he says softly. “I was joking around, you know I’m not still mad about the earth sciences thing—”

“It’s not that.”

Eli’s voice is unexpectedly harsh. Demetri winces.

“…what is it, then?”

Eli’s frown deepens, eyes boring a hole in the plastic of the dashboard and looking anywhere but Demetri’s. “I missed this.”

Demetri blinks in confusion. “Missed what?”

“I missed this.” Eli finally looks up, unfortunately donning the doe-eyed stare that always makes Demetri’s rational side fly out the window. “I missed you.”

For a moment, Demetri is lost for words.

Even with Cobra Kai in the distant past, Eli still clings so desperately to the notion that he needs to hide his “embarrassing” sentimental streak. For him to be this forward…

He crosses his arms, giving his friend a half smirk. “Are you just now realizing this?”

“No, idiot.” Eli groans, slumping down and practically banging his head on the dashboard. He lets out a shaky sigh.

“Fuck.” His voice is muffled when he speaks again. “I never should have pushed you away like I did.”

Demetri frowns. Eli must really be a mess about this if he’s considering another apology. “You don’t have to—”

“I know, I know,” Eli cuts him off. “You don’t want me to say sorry again. And I’m not. But I’m done making excuses for all the fucked shit I did to you.”

“You’re not—”

“Would you shut up and let me talk?!”

Eli snaps at him with surprising ferocity, looking up to fix him with an icy glare. Demetri raises his hands in surrender, gesturing for his friend to continue.

“I didn’t get it. I didn’t know why you didn’t want to change with me, and I couldn’t figure out why you were holding onto this…this version of me that everyone else thought was a pathetic piece of shit. And I think I got angry at you for it. For I guess…caring too much about the loser part of me that I fucking hated. I thought you had bad taste, and I couldn’t respect that.”

“Eli, you’re not a loser—”

“I’m not done.” The icy glare intensifies. Demetri once again forces himself to shut up, difficult though it is.

“It felt great,” Eli goes on. “Having people respect me for the first time in my life. And I wanted you to be there with me. I thought no matter what happened, you’d always be there with me. But…you flaunted the stuff I didn’t want anyone to see, and it freaked me out. I was scared if you stuck around, people would realize I was full of shit, and they’d go back to hating me. So I pushed you away.”

Demetri stares at him, dumbfounded. He hasn’t heard Eli be this articulate about his emotions in a long while.

Eli groans again, staring out into the sunset. “It was all so stupid. I should’ve told you all this. Maybe if we talked about it, we wouldn’t have ever—well, shit wouldn’t have gotten as bad. And we almost did, too.” He gives Demetri a sorrowful look. “You tried to make things right at Moon’s party. And I fucked it all up, because I couldn’t accept that someone cared about me for—for more than how many punches I could throw.”

Demetri shakes his head. “No, Eli, that’s on me. I was the one who went up and ran my mouth. It’s my fault everything started spiraling like it did.”

“You wouldn’t have run your mouth if I hadn’t been a shit to you all summer.” Eli gives him a stern look. “And then been even more shitty to you when you were willing to let it be water under the bridge or whatever. I just…”

He lets out a shaky breath. “I can’t believe I let you slip away like that, after everything we’ve been though. All because I was too much of a pussy to admit that you weren’t some…horrible, pathetic nerd for caring about all the shit in me I didn’t like. For reminding me of all the shit I didn’t want anyone to see. Leaving you behind, that whole thing—it was the biggest fucking mistake of my life.”

Demetri catches his breath. That’s no small claim.

“I should’ve fought for us to stay together,” Eli goes on. “Like we always have. But I gave up on you for practically nothing, and that was fucked.”

Demetri can’t argue with that. He doubts it will ever fully stop stinging, thinking of Eli turning on him so easily.

Eli gives him a long look. “I was fucking stupid to take you for granted.”

He sighs, smiling weakly.

“You know…I was pretty fucking stupid to take you for granted, too. It had always been us, and it—well, it didn’t even occur to me that there’d ever be a time you weren’t around. Always just…Demetri and Eli, binary brothers!”

He sings the theme in a grating voice, and Eli has to break his serious demeanor to moan.

“Anyways, I…” Demetri trails off, frowning. “All the crap we were going through with people picking on us…I didn’t realize it was hurting you like that. I mean, it sucked for me too, but I get it wasn’t the same. I should have listened to what you wanted, and not just…I don’t know. Assumed I knew what was best for both of us.”

“You were trying to protect me, though.” Though Eli sounds surly about the fact, he doesn’t seem angry.

“I thought I was. I figured if things stayed the way they were, they at least wouldn’t get worse.”

“I know.” Eli huffs, melting back down into the dashboard and lying his head against the plastic. “And I knew you were fucking wrong. That the only way wasn’t to just…wallow in misery or whatever. I should’ve fought harder to make you see that. So I could just…” His voice breaks slightly. “So I could keep you with me.”

“You…” Demetri studies the steering wheel. “You really wanted to?”

“More than anything.” He turns to see Eli looking at him so sincerely that he thinks he might break apart. “I wanted us to be in Cobra Kai together. I nagged you to rejoin for months.”

“I know. I remember.” Demetri chuckles. “I guess it seemed easier to let you and Miguel do the intimidating if people bothered us. You two seemed to enjoy it.”

“Yeah, but…” Eli huffed. “You had to know we weren’t always going to be around to protect your scrawny ass.”

“Denial’s a powerful thing, Eli.” His friend only rolls his eyes. “And when I got to be a part of your little karate world without Gym Class 2.0, I didn’t feel the need to get kicked in the face.”

“I was used to you always being the one who talked.” Eli sighs, leaning back. “I wanted people to notice me for once. And I guess I got high off it when they did.”

Demetri shakes his head, smiling sadly. “I was happy for you, you know. I wished I was brave enough to be like you. But I felt you drifting, and I guess I got more and more frantic to hold onto you.”

“You never should’ve felt the need,” Eli mutters. “You were the only constant in my life, and I tried to wreck whatever we had. All so I wouldn’t have to feel like I was a nerd anymore.”

He groans, leaning against the dashboard with his head in his hands. Demetri leans over the console box, putting a hand on Eli’s shoulder. “Hey…”

Eli props his chin on his hands, giving Demetri a sidelong glance.

“This whole thing…this trip…” Demetri uses his other hand to gesture abstractly. “It can be a fresh start. Maybe all the painful crap between us from the last year doesn’t have to hurt anymore.”

Eli snorts. “It can’t be that easy.”

“Sure it can.” Demetri laughs, giving his friend’s shoulder a light squeeze. “We forgave each other. And we’re together now. Isn’t that what matters?”

Eli’s brow furrows, but he doesn’t contradict him.

“I know it sucks,” Demetri goes on. “Everything that happened. And frankly, I was a massive idiot to assume you’d stick around when I wasn’t really willing to…you know, adapt to your new thing. When I couldn’t see that karate could be a good shtick for you, too. I’m sorry if I was dismissive.”

“You were adapting,” Eli argues. “You came to the tournament and Valley Fest. You bought all that fucking merchandise. You just wouldn’t take my shit, and I hated it.”

“Still. I could have handled it better.” Demetri smiles meekly. “But it’s all in the past now. Right now? This epic quest through the wilds of Mexico, filled with adventure and daring-do? Well, not to be a sap, but it’s a chance for us to make new, better memories together. And I promise you that this is what I’m going to remember in the end, not any vague flashes of ridiculous karate war nonsense.”

“You mean that?” Eli sits up, eyes widening hopefully. “You’re not just saying that?”

“Why would I?”

“‘I say a lot of things. It’s a very polarizing attribute of mine.’” Demetri winces as Eli mimics him in a high-pitched nasally voice.

“Okay, well.” He chuckles nervously. “Not this time. Pinky-swear on it?”

He brushes his hand off Eli’s shoulder, extending his pinky. Eli smiles timidly and takes it with his own.

When Eli looks up, something in his expression is different. There’s a sort of cautious curiosity, like there’s something he’s on the brink of wanting to reach for. A strange kind of wonder imagining what will happen if he does.

It’s as though Demetri’s blood has decided to rush through him at 3 times its normal speed. He sits stiff, breaths coming fast, eyes locked with Eli’s.

He hopes whatever nervous sweat he’s inevitably pumping out isn’t going to make him stink.

And suddenly he’s back at Moon’s party, across the couch from a recently-dumped Eli. He’s watching Eli inch toward him—red camouflage jacket, eager smile, eyes stealing glance after glance at his lips. He’s edging closer himself, every molecule in his body fluttering and screaming from the way Eli is looking at him.

And there he is, about to take advice from his least favorite martial arts studio in the entire world.

Strike first. Strike first. Strike first.

It was something Miguel told him earlier that summer—how Sensei Lawrence talked about how you needed to “go all in.” Fully commit. Make a move before someone else did. Not usually Demetri’s style, but he wasn’t the same wimp who used to hide behind Miguel and Eli—he was Miyagi Do now. He was learning karate and he was learning how to be brave, just like the rest of them.

And Demetri was done lying to himself about how he felt about Eli. No more cowardice, no more pretending “best friends” was good enough. He was going to grow a pair and tell the truth.

And then he saw how Eli looked at Moon, face crumpling like his heart was breaking in real time. He realized how absurd it was to ever think Eli would feel the same way. That Eli would ever feel that kind of longing for a boy.

And so he chickened out.

Still a pussy, Eli said. And he was right. If Demetri was anything but, he would have leaned across that couch and told Eli Moskowitz that he wanted to be with him. That he didn’t care about karate rivalries or unhinged senseis or unsafe dojo practices or ripping shirts off for no reason or insane hairdos or cheating at martial arts tournaments—he wanted to be with him. Eli could call the whole world pussies and parrot back every absurd thing his senseis said, and Demetri would still want to hold him.

But they’re not at Moon’s party now. There’s no uninterested ex to draw Eli’s eye, and no looming threat of Kreese sinking his toxic “no defeat allowed” claws into Eli’s mind.

He’s free, and he’s using that freedom to look at Demetri.

I’m not going to be a pussy anymore.

He leans across the console box. Eli’s eyes widen, lips parting.

He’s shooting glances at Demetri’s mouth again, unabashedly hopeful. Out the passenger window behind him, Mazatlán is lighting up for the night, bathing Eli in a soft yellow glow. It’s a gorgeous color mosaic—orange and gold city lights, hazy blue-black mountains, rippling midnight blue waves, indigo sky, the faint green of illuminated palm trees, the red of radio towers. The beautiful soft blue of Eli’s eyes, staring at him like nothing else matters.

Demetri wonders if Eli looked at him like this all along, and he was just too blind to see it. He can’t allow himself to be that optimistic.

When his hand slides around the back of Eli’s neck, the other boy presses into it. His thumb brushes Eli’s cheek as they lean in, and Demetri barely dares to breathe.

Eli is the one who closes the distance. He kisses hard and fierce, like this is the most important thing he’s ever done. Demetri’s fingers flutter across Eli’s skin as they draw in and out, melting into each other and pulling away again.

If his blood was pumping before, it has more pressure than a busted water pipe now. Demetri’s doctor would faint if he knew.

It’s difficult to form thoughts, but Demetri arrives at a few.

The first is that Eli’s skin is soft, the back of his neck dusted with the lowermost velvety hair of his buzzcut. The second is that Eli’s lips are chapped from the desert heat—and unfortunately still taste a little like habanero-soaked carnitas, despite how many bottles of milk he downed after the fact. The third is that this is the first time they’ve kissed for no reason.

There are no Miguel worries plaguing them, hanging heavy in the air and making it difficult to think of anything else. There are no nightmares demanding physical comfort, be it arms or lips or both. There are no elderly homophobes nearby to make uncomfortable.

They’re kissing solely because they want to.

Demetri smiles into Eli’s lips and kisses him deeper.

He fancies himself quite a fool to believe that last night’s desperate cartop make-out session was the single greatest moment of his life, and everything after would pale in comparison. This make-out session clearly takes the cake, and only after this does he have to worry about his life taking a turn for the abysmal.

After what feels like barely any time at all, Eli pulls away. Demetri feels a wave of resigned disappointment trickle through him.

Ah, well. This is to be expected. It’s high time Eli Moskowitz comes to his senses.

Then, for not the first time in these last few whirlwind days, his best friend surprises him.

Eli pushes up the top of the console box and slithers over it with unexpected grace, maneuvering his way into the driver’s seat. He slides onto Demetri’s lap, knees straddling him.

Demetri hasn’t worried about spontaneous human combustion in earnest since he was 8 or so, but he certainly is now. Every neuron in his brain is firing at a thousand miles an hour, entire being buzzing with energy that has nowhere to go.

Eli’s hands begin sliding up his chest, finding their way under his shirt. Fingers dance across his skin tantalizingly slow, and Demetri is honestly surprised that the intensity of whatever is now capturing his body isn’t strong enough to make the windows shatter.

His skinny, bony form certainly doesn’t feel large enough to contain it. At this point, it wouldn’t surprise him if all the chemical reactions inside him, kicked into overdrive, collectively decide they’re exhausted with this nonsense and evaporate him on the spot.

“Oh.” A hand stops near the middle of his chest, and Eli smirks. “Your pulse is racing. Do I make you nervous, Dem?”

Demetri’s answer is incoherent stutters—because he really has no satisfactory answer.

Maybe he knows what the answer is. Maybe he knows what he wishes it wasn’t.

“Wait.” The blood drains from Eli’s face, and he goes rigid. “You’re not still…?”

The question goes unfinished, but Demetri knows what it is. You’re not still scared of me, are you?

Eli looks like he might throw up at the notion.

Demetri raises a hand to cup his face. “I was never scared of you, Eli,” he whispers. “I was only ever scared of losing you.”

Maybe it’s an exaggeration. He certainly was unnerved when Eli stalked through the computer lab shouting his name, or had him pinned on the arcade floor. But “scared” isn’t the right word for what he felt.

It was more worry. Grief, maybe. The anguish that Eli was slipping away into something cold and hard and dark and unfeeling, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. And, perhaps worst of all, that he knew Eli was miserable underneath it all.

He knows Eli, and he knows him putting on some over-the-top façade is exhausting and frustrating and empty. Any happiness that he got out of this fake-him would never quite be enough to cancel out what it took out of him.

And how could he be scared of Eli? How could he be scared of the same boy who once looked at him like he was the funniest kid at West Valley High, who only lashed out when he felt scared and unloved and alone?

It’s easy to fear what you don’t understand. Perhaps that’s why he can never fear Eli Moskowitz.

Because Eli is one of the few people in this chaotic and confusing world that he does understand. One of the few people he always has. And it’s hard to quake in terror when you know practically every turn and corner and dead end in the maze of someone’s mind.

Perhaps if Eli is something intimately familiar, the house he grew up in, then ‘Hawk’ is the basement at night. The one avoided corner, familiar yet eerie. Always there, but relatively untouched. The part of the house you minimize your time in—grab what you need and run back up the stairs. The one room that gives you chills, where you feel like you’re outside the jurisdiction of the rest of the house’s protective walls.

Nonetheless, the basement comes with the house, and it would be absurd to never go home again because one measly, cobwebby room gives you the creeps. It would be absurd to give up on Eli Moskowitz because he has an ugly side. God knows Demetri does, too.

“You’ll never lose me.” Eli’s voice is unexpectedly fierce when he speaks, eyes blazing with an icy blue fire. “Never again. I swear.”

He leans into Demetri’s hand, and as his eyes soften, Demetri realizes how unequivocally fucked he is.

I love you. Oh god. I love you.

He doesn’t say it. If Eli Moskowitz is inevitably going to shatter his heart into a thousand pieces, it’s not going to be on a trip when they’re stuck in a car together for at least two more weeks. There will be plenty of time for Demetri to be emotionally gutted once Miguel is safe and sound.

“I can’t lose you,” he says instead, voice cracking. “Please. I think it would kill me.”

“I’m staying.” Eli’s voice is quiet again, fingers starting to massage Demetri’s chest. “I promise I’m staying this time.”

Warm fingers continue sliding up his torso, and he leans into them. In one sweeping motion, they hook onto the inside of his shirt and pull it over his head—and just like that, Demetri can no longer inform people that he is silently correcting their grammar. Revolting.

Eli presses into him, and Demetri loops long arms around his waist, pulling him closer. He feels Eli’s hands slide behind his neck, holding it with a gentle firmness that sends shivers ripping through him. Eli smiles so softly that Demetri idly wonders if his brain will ever be able to fully function again.

And then Eli leans in, pushing him up against the back of the driver’s seat and kissing him hard. All at once, everything slides into place.

***

The first thing Demetri sees when he wakes up is a purple and brown blur.

He grunts, moving a hand to find it brushing across smooth, bare skin. The other seems to be interlocked with something soft and warm.

Demetri lifts his head, blinking until his eyes focus. The purple and brown smudges form into the shape of feathers.

Eli’s tattoo. Demetri starts.

The body underneath him shifts, and Eli turns his head to the side to look up at him. “Morning, Dem.”

Eli’s arms are folded into a makeshift pillow, the real pillows and blankets strewn chaotically across the backseat. Demetri realizes one of his own arms is tangled among Eli’s.

There’s a squeeze around his palm, and his face grows hot. His fingers are interlocked with Eli’s, apparently having stayed that way all night. What’s far more interesting, however, is that upon a backwards glance Demetri realizes that, in the king’s English, they’re both butt fucking naked.

There are a couple blankets loosely strewn across them, covering skin here and there, but it’s a sorry attempt at concealment. It’s clear they both went to sleep with not a garment to either of their names.

Demetri squawks in surprise, nearly falling off Eli and onto the car floor. “Did we…?”

Eli scoffs, lifting his head to roll his eyes more visibly. “No, Demetri, we joined a nudist colony last night.”

Demetri’s eyes trail around the disheveled makeshift bedding and land on a suspiciously non-empty condom on the floor, right under the driver’s seat. The previous night comes crashing back to him in one overwhelming rush, and his face suddenly burns like never before.

“We did,” he confirms, although the words come out as more of a squeak than a statement.

“Oh, don’t sound so horrified.” Eli lets go of his hand to swat his shoulder. “I wasn’t that bad, was I?”

“No, no!” Demetri shakes his head rapidly, unable to meet Eli’s eyes. If his cheeks were smoldering before, they’re an uncontrolled California wildfire now. “You were great, actually, I just, uh…I mean, I didn’t, uh…I just…”

He trails off, suddenly wholly unsure what he’s trying to say. Groaning, he presses his palm to his forehead. “Fuck.”

“Oh, noooo.” Eli’s voice is dripping with quiet sarcasm. “Did you get me pregnant?”

“Shut up!” Demetri punches his arm, and Eli cackles.

Demetri dares to look at his eyes, and they’re glowing. His best friend is so nonchalant, and Demetri wonders idly how many times Eli’s been in this exact situation. The morning after, wrapped up in blankets, processing the experience. The thought of Eli joking around while lying naked with someone else makes Demetri uneasy.

He can’t say why. It’s not like the thought is that surprising.

Maybe you just want to be different. Selfish prick.

Guilt gnaws at him. He shouldn’t feel like he has any claim over Eli. Not when he was oblivious to how miserable his best friend was for so long.

But for reasons he’d rather not get to the bottom of, it feels a little unfair.

“I feel like I’m the one who should be worried.” Eli rolls over, knocking Demetri off his back and sending him tumbling onto the ruffled comforter beside them. Blue eyes turn to face him, glinting suspiciously. “You didn’t give me herpes or some shit, right?”

“Wh—no!” Demetri gawks at him, mortified. He gestures wildly in exasperation, nearly smacking Eli’s bare chest in the process. “I don’t have any of those! Why would you think that?!”

Eli frowns, like Demetri’s failing to grasp a very obvious point. “Uh, because you were dating the most popular chick at West Valley High? And if you don’t think she got around before you, your head’s up your ass.”

“What, you think me and Yasmine—?” Despite himself, Demetri clutches his chest and howls with laughter.

Eli’s frown deepens. “What’s so fucking funny?! It’s a fair assumption!”

It’s a while before Demetri can breathe enough to answer. “You think Yasmine the lesbian and I had sex?”

“She wasn’t out yet!”

“Ah yes, and most lesbians, as we know, are just clamoring to get dicked by their beards.”

“Look, I don’t know! I thought she might do it to keep up appearances!”

“To whom, Eli? Her crazy homophobic mom isn’t going to ask about the details of her sex life. Who does she need to emphasize her undying love of penis to? Moon the bisexual all-accepting hippie? Sam ‘head filled only with karate wars and Miguel’ LaRusso? Were you under the impression that my girlfriend invited her mother to watch us get it on to make absolutely sure her family remained unaware she likes boobs?”

“Wh—dude, no! Why would you make me think about that?!” After seeming to shake the image from his head, he fixes Demetri with a devilish smirk. “I thought maybe it was so bad that that’s how she figured out she’s gay.”

Demetri scoffs. “Oh, you would love that. Nice try, but it never got that far.”

“That’s weird.” Eli frowns again. “She seems like the type who’d experiment with that shit. You know, even if she realized later she didn’t like guys. She did do other guys before you, right?”

Demetri doesn’t answer.

“Right?” Eli asks again.

Demetri sucks in a breath. “Well…not…not other, uh, guys.”

Eli’s eyes grow huge. “She banged a chick?! Do you know who? How did she get away with being that popular and never banging a guy?”

Demetri glares at him. “I’m not at liberty to divulge who. In any case, it was hush-hush enough that it never got out. Anyhow, Yas said she got plenty of dick, to maintain the ‘hottest girl in school’ reputation and all, but I mean…if you’re some shmuck and Yasmine says she bagged you, are you really going to deny it? That is social suicide, straight up.”

“So her sleeping with those football guys she went out with? That was all bullshit?”

“Pretty much. She lives by my philosophy of trying to get the gain without the pain. You get to be desirable without actually having to pop your cherry. Or having a cock pop your cherry, anyways.”

There’s a short silence. Blood begins to creep into Demetri’s cheeks as he remembers the whirlwind relationship, and how different it must have been from the outside vs. the inside. It was one of his stranger experiences, but one that he knows will make a good story in 20 years or so.

That is, of course, assuming he has any success making friends in adulthood. He hopes there will be at least a few he can entertain with the riveting tale of his extremely hot and extremely gay high school girlfriend.

“We messed around a bit,” he admits. “More than, uh, making out. She wanted to know what fooling around with someone with a dick was like. We tried handjobs.”

Eli hums in sarcastic sympathy. “And it wasn’t everything you dreamed it would be?”

“Not really. Pretty underwhelming. She seemed like she wanted to get it over with so we could go hang out with Moon at the mall.”

Eli snorts with laughter. “Oh my god, seriously?”

“Oh, yeah. She was treating the whole thing like a gaming speedrun. I didn’t even finish. And trust me when I say it does not take much.”

“Did you do anything else?”

He inches a little closer, gleaming with curiosity. Demetri wonders if there isn’t a tiny streak of worry in his pretty features, too.

He doubts it. Eli couldn’t care less what he did with Yasmine, he’s sure.

Demetri shrugs. “We dry-humped. Never took anything off, but she straddled me on the couch when her parents weren’t home and we went at it for a bit. She never seemed to get into it, though. Believe me when I say the moans were very fake.”

Eli snickers, and Demetri can’t help but smile. The whole thing is pretty funny in retrospect, if he’s being honest with himself.

He shakes his head, smile suddenly fading. “I had to tell her to stop. The whole thing felt…I don’t know, performative. I could tell she was just going through the motions and not actually enjoying it. Seemed like a waste of time if she was uncomfortable through the whole thing, so we put on Clueless and ordered burritos instead.”

“So she wasn’t into it at all?”

“Not even a little. It was lifeless.” He smiles wanly. “We agreed not to do anything after that, and honestly? I’d never seen her more relieved.”

“And was this before or after the stoned lesbian flirting incident?”

“Oh, months after. March, I think. If I suspected at Moon’s girls’ nights, I knew for damn sure then. After that I knew it was just a matter of time before she called things off.”

“Really?” Eli blinks in surprise. “So no more groping after that?”

“Nope. She was—well, you know how she was at school, but alone? We never tried anything else. It was too awkward.”

Eli looks at him contemplatively, eyes glinting with a light Demetri isn’t sure he likes. When he smirks again, Demetri groans.

“So I have to know.” Eli scoots closer, humming mockingly. “You said you and Yasmine broke up a couple of weeks before the All-Valley. And if you guys weren’t even messing around anymore…”

Eli rolls onto Demetri’s chest in one quick movement, grinning triumphantly down. “What the hell were all those condoms and things of lube doing in the glovebox, Mr. we’re-not-going-to-Mexico-to-get-laid?”

Demetri is sure his face is the same shade of red that Eli’s hair once was. “Uh…well…” As he looks away, Eli presses down harder on him. “I didn’t think, um—I didn’t think it was entirely out of the question that we might end up—”

“Ha!” Eli barks out a laugh, smacking Demetri’s chest. “You devious little fucker. You planned this whole thing out, didn’t you?”

“I did not!” Demetri splutters. “I just think it’s good to prepare for all possibilities is all! What’s so wrong about that?!”

“Nothing.” Eli reaches out and starts playing with a stray strand of Demetri’s hair. When he looks at him, his eyes are big and innocent and infuriating. “Just think it’s funny that you thought us fucking was likely enough to justify 20 condoms and 6 bottles of lube.”

Demetri is fairly certain that, once again, his face is at risk of burning off. “Well, was I wrong, Eli?!”

“No. But you’re so presumptuous it’s fucking hilarious. You just assumed I’d want to bang you?”

“Again! I assumed correctly!”

“You did. I’ll give you that. You know something?” Eli leans forward, lips by his ear. Demetri shivers. “That’s what I like about this new you. You don’t mope around all day thinking about what a piece of shit you are. You know you deserve some nice things.”

Demetri smirks against his shoulder. “Like dicking you?”

“Precisely.”

“You’re welcome.” Demetri lifts a hand, trailing his fingers across Eli’s bare back. “‘Demetri, I’m not gonna get laid this entire trip! This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me!’” He mimics Eli’s previous-day complaint in a nasally, squeaky voice.

“H—hey!” Eli shoves his chest hard, pressing him further down into the seat. Demetri sniggers.

“I hope I was as good as all the Mexican girls you won’t have time to seduce.”

“Hey, it’s young days yet—”

“Eli. That is all the sex you’re getting. We have a mission.”

“Fine. I guess that’ll do for now.” Eli pouts like a child, and Demetri can’t help but laugh.

“Oh, don’t be so ungrateful. You seemed to have a pretty good time.”

There’s a chill in the air, one that has been steadily creeping in through the cracks in the doors and filling the car with a damp ocean breeze. Demetri is suddenly reminded that they’ve spent the night without a heater and that his skin is growing frosty, even with Eli acting as an impromptu human blanket.

Seeming to read his mind, Eli reaches over and pulls a wad of blankets over them.

“We should go soon.”

Eli murmurs the words softly, pressing a kiss to Demetri’s neck. He tightens his arm around Eli’s back, another shiver rippling through him.

It’s really very unfair, how Eli can so easily unravel him with one small touch. He needs to work on that. It’s something ex-Sensei Lawrence might refer to as “pussy behavior”—and regrettably, ex-Sensei Lawrence is, occasionally, right.

Before he can figure out what to do about it, a sharp rap on the car window nearly makes him jump out of his skin.

“Señores?”

“Shit.” Demetri yanks the blankets closer, frantically trying to cover any exposed skin on both of them. Which is a lot. “Shit. Shit. Shit.”

A woman in some sort of security guard uniform is standing outside the backseat window, tightly gripping a notepad. Not a cop, Demetri doesn’t think, but nonetheless someone very displeased about them being there.

She knocks on the window again, frowning. Demetri shoves a bundle of blankets to Eli under the comforter, hissing for him to make himself decent.

As they scramble to cover themselves, Demetri squirms into the front seat, comforter in tow. He cracks the driver’s door, smiling brightly despite the icy rush of air that assaults his bedding-clad body.

“Hi, officer!” He doesn’t know the proper title for a night watch guard or what have you, but this seems close enough. “What seems to be the problem?”

She raises her eyebrows, looking at him like he’s just a little bit of a lunatic.

“Ustedes no deberían estar aquí.” Ah. Excellent. So no English, apparently. “El mirador no abrirá hasta dentro de 3 horas.”

Probably something to the gist of how they shouldn’t be here, this was a permit-only lot, etc etc. Demetri gives her his best remorseful look.

“Lo lamento, nos iremos.”

The security guard narrows her eyes, seemingly not satisfied. There’s a shuffling behind him, and he glances back to see Eli maneuvering his way into the front seat with a thick cloak of blankets trailing behind.

“Llegamos un poco temprano, así que decidimos ver el paisaje,” he pipes up. “Ya que estabamos aquí.”

He situates himself into the passenger’s seat, wiggling around in his blanket robes until he’s sitting up straight and looking very confident in himself. He raises a hand and smooths down some rumpled hair, presumably to look more dignified.

Ah, so Eli’s hair is long enough to rumple now. Demetri tries not to think about how cute it looks.

The security guard’s gaze drifts from the lowered backseat and the strewn bedspread to the two blanket-wrapped teenagers. Her bag-accompanied eyes glint sharply, like she’s finally putting two and two together.

Demetri very much wishes she wasn’t.

“Esperen, ¿acaso estuvieron aquí toda la noche?” she demands. “¿Y haciendo qué rayos, exactamente?”

Demetri and Eli exchange a panicked look. “Nada,” Demetri mumbles, not meeting her eyes. “Nada importante.”

She looks over them again, expression prying. Like she’s trying to get them to come clean about a dastardly crime. Despite the chilly air, Demetri imagines his entire face is glistening with nervous sweat.

He wonders if he’s about to wither away.

“¿Y qué onda con todas esas cobijas?” she pipes up, frowning.

Luckily, Eli answers indignantly before Demetri can panic over what to say. “¡Esque hace frío aquí atras!” Demetri nods earnestly as Eli begins to shiver for effect. Something about them being wrapped up in blankets because they’re so cold, and definitely not because they’re in their birthday suits underneath.

The security guard hums in consideration before letting out a long, weary sigh. “Los vi aquí adentro esta mañana,” she says finally.

Demetri turns to look at his friend. From the way Eli’s face drops, this is not good.

The security guard sighs again. “Bueno, caballeros... Me temo que tendré que multarlos por traspasar propiedad estatal e indecencia pública.”

She pulls out what looks like a ticketbook and starts scribbling away, brow creased. Demetri lets out a mewl of despair.

He feels a reassuring hand squeeze his arm, and turns to give Eli a desperate look. “Do something!” he hisses.

Eli shrugs apologetically. “She said she saw us in here this morning, man,” he whispers back. “We’re not even supposed to be here. We’d better just take the L.”

Demetri whimpers again, and Eli groans. “What, you’ve never gotten a ticket before?”

“No! Normal people don’t go around committing ticketable crimes, Eli!”

A hand pokes through the car door crack, offering a narrow red strip of paper. As soon as Demetri takes it, the security guard stalks off, mumbling about turistas cachondos.

Demetri looks over what he can only assume is a ticket and lets out a wail. Not a word of it is written in English, and the largest of the text is no bigger than his pinky nail.

“I can’t understand any of this—”

Eli snatches it away and scrutinizes it, brow furrowing. A fond smile tugs at Demetri’s lips. Eli has always looked so intense when he concentrates.

“Fuck, dude, I can barely make out shit, either,” he mutters. He looks up, fixing Demetri with a small smirk. “All the more reason to find Miguel, right? He can translate for us. Otherwise you’ll never be able to pay this ticket, and the Mexican government will hunt you down.”

He raises his hands and wiggles his fingers, making ghost noises. Demetri promptly smacks him.

“Cheer up.” Eli snakes an arm around Demetri’s neck, giving his shoulder a brief squeeze. “I’ll protect you if they send parking violation assassins after you.”

“Thanks. I appreciate it.”

Demetri laughs, leaning across the console box to slump against Eli’s shoulder.

“Can we get Starbucks?” he mumbles.

Eli chuckles. “Sure. But we should probably put clothes on first.”

***

Eyyyyy let’s hear it for Counselor Blatt x Principal Holloway, the real OTP of this whole operation!!!

Hilariously enough Dem and Eli’s elementary school principal is 100% based off my own, like this fucker never stopped kicking up a fuss about how you absolutely had to tell a teacher if you were being bullied and fighting back made you “just as bad as them” like sorry my man but if you teach bullying victims to be weenies and snitches they’re literally never going to learn how to solve any of their life problems on their own lmaooooo

Yes, Demetri is a virgin and Hawk is not. Yes, I will attest to this in court. Yasmine’s sudden over-the-top horniness was 1000% an act because a) that is the ONLY way her S4 behavior makes ANY goddamn sense and b) the idea of Demetri dating what seems to be the thirstiest girl in the entire school and never getting any is just so objectively hilarious to me.

Realistically, would Eli and Demetri slut-shame Yas for supposedly “getting around” a lot??? Maybe, but slut-shaming does not exist in this dojo because I say so, get fucked

Also how fucking funny is it that I just instinctively knew Clueless would be Yasmine’s favorite romcom and only later remembered that it had a subplot about the girly-girl protagonist dating a guy aND REALIZING HE WAS GAY HOLY SHIT

Not giving the exact Spanish translations this time because it’ll be objectively much funnier to make y’all wait until Miguel translates that ticket for them >:3 BUT the basic gist is that the security guard lady is like “wtf are y’all doing here? This lookout point doesn’t open for 3 hours...also fucking excuse me, were you here all night??? What were you doing???” and then Eli frantically tries to save their asses by being like “Ohhhh well we just got here early and figured we might as well stay and uh...look at the beautiful scenery!!! Also we’re totally not naked, we’re just wrapped in 5 layers of blankets because it’s cold in here, promise!!!”

These dumb horny idiots I stg XD GOOD FOR THEM THOUGH GOOD FOR THEM

[inimoo]

Operation: Eradicate the Homoerotic Energy Between Our Dads

Chapter 1 - The Phone Call Chapter 2 - Sam, Henry, Clara, and William Chapter 3 - Aunt Jen's Letters Chapter 4 - Caught in the Act Chapter 5 - Graduation Chapter 6 - Planes and Cars Chapter 7 - Wrinkled Polaroids Chapter 8 - "I'll have your babies Charlie. Platonically." Chapter 9 - A Tree Room Chapter 10 - Blueprints from 1968 Chapter 11 - Samantha Adeline Rogers

Summary: Michael overhears his father calling Uncle Henry 'babygirl' and is mortified to a point where he enlists the help of his best friend Charlie to attempt to eradicate all forms of sexually charged tension between their dads.

In hindsight, they probably should've just let them makeout.

Michael ends up in a room alone with his father. Realistically, he shouldn’t have been surprised. There are two spare rooms and two families - it made sense that he would be sharing it with his dad and Charlie with hers. So really, he shouldn’t be this uncomfortable sleeping beside his dad who isn’t even awake.

He’s been trying to go to sleep for two hours now.

Michael hasn’t slept in the same room as his dad since he was eleven. He tosses and turns and groans and slaps his hands onto his face. He counts sheep, he lists things he didn’t get for his birthday that he wanted, he creates a perfect person in his head, he thinks about everything he likes about the Emilys. He’s desperate to fall asleep.

Michael, after glancing at the clock and seeing that it was 2 AM, decides that he’s better off just getting up instead of accidentally waking up his father with his movements. He hurls himself up from the bed, blinks away the bleariness of his eyes and yawns, before standing up and ever so quietly stepping away and opening the door.

He’s fine with not going upstairs; it made sense that Aunt Jen asked of it and he wasn’t going to go exploring someone else's house just because he was bored. There’s only one room up there anyway and it’s her own bedroom. He walks down the hallway quietly, eyes grazing the walls. There’s not once inch of it that doesn’t have a photo on it. Aunt Jen knows so many people, been to so many places, done so many things whenever she had the time. He’s a little jealous.

Michael isn’t exactly sure why his father never lets him go anywhere outside the town. He’s quite confident in himself that he knows why his father never lets him go anywhere near the old locations though. He wonders if he thinks he’s simply moved on from Evan. He hasn’t - he doesn’t think he ever will.

There’s a soft, quiet melody playing from somewhere in the house. Michael stops, frowns, then turns his head to the sound. He raises an eyebrow before following the music coming from the kitchen.

“Charlie?”

Charlie’s sitting on the counter island hunched over a piece of paper in her hands and a radio beside her playing the illusive song. Her hair is a mess (which is surprising seeing how short it was at the moment), her eyes are puffy and red, and tears stain her round cheeks. Probably the more concerning part are the two empty bottles of beer beside her.

Michael stands at the archway for a moment with his brows furrowed in both concern and surprise before stepping towards her tentatively. He’s not really good at comforting. Himself or other people but he cautiously sits on the counter next to her and leans down to look at her face.

“Are you okay? You’re listening to ‘It’s Been A Long, Long Time on repeat.” he says and she laughs weakly.

Charlie’s always had a thing with listening to that song when she was sad and Michael takes it as a tell tale sign that she wasn’t feeling good. Charlie thinks it’s funny when she’s not too sad to stop laughing.

“I’m…” she starts, her breath cracking a bit, “I’m fine.”

“If you were fine you wouldn’t be crying in the kitchen at 2 AM listening to this song Charlie.” he says softly.

Charlie chuckles, “You know, sometimes it’s really annoying you know so much about me.”

“Equal exchange.” Michael smiles. “You know that I go into Lizzie’s room when I’m sad and I know you listen to war songs when you are.” he sits up again and Charlie looks up. “What’s up with you?”

She wipes her eyes and sits straight, laughing. “It’s really embarrassing.”

“Charlie I’ve seen you worse than this. You’ve seen me worse than this.”

“Yeah well that’s different.” she says, “It was after E-” her voice goes quieter, “It was after Evan died. Obviously you were worse.”

Michael feels his heart stop beating for a second as a pang of pain fills his chest but he doesn’t let it show. “You know both of our brother’s died. We’re in the same boat.”

Charlie sighs, then rests her head on her palm and looking back at the paper in her hand. Michael glances down and sees that it’s actually a picture. The same one they were looking at when they got to Aunt Jen’s house with their parents playing a card game.

“I don’t know why I’m crying over a stupid picture.” Charlie exclaims and she sounds a little miffed at herself, “I’m so dumb! I’ve seen her before, I see her literally every time I wake up and go downstairs like, there’s literally no reason I should be crying right now!”

“I would be crying too,” Michael tells her, “I mean, you never got to grow up with your mom. I’d cry so much more.”

“Then why aren’t you crying,” she asks like she thinks he’s lying, “You didn’t get to grow up with your mom either.” She died when you were eleven.

“Well for one it wouldn’t really be good if both of us were crying,” he says simply, “And I remember mother. You didn’t get to.”

Charlie falls silent. The song gains more and more volume as Kitty Kalen’s voice intensifies. It’s the bridge - the chorus, both Michael and Charlie’s favourite part, would start soon.

“There’s a note too,” she offers like it was a compensation for burdening him with her laments, “Look, it’s on the back.”

Michael takes it out of her hand and flips it over.

Charlotte, Samuel, and Michael all together plus me, Henry, Clara and William!! By the way Clara and William totally cheated they were not that good last time they played

There are a bunch of hearts around the words and smiley faces surrounding the note and a little drawing in the corner with four stick figures and three little ovals with faces that Michael assumes are babies. He chuckles sadly and then looks at Charlie again.

“See? It’s totally depressing but I don’t know why the fuck I’m crying over two sentences.” she complains.

Michael doesn’t say anything. She moves close to him and loops her arm around his.

He leans back and glances at the beer bottles again. “How much did you drink Charlie?”

“I don’t know,” she says miserably, still looking at the picture, “I lost track.”

He lets out a low whistle, “Drink some water Emily - have you had any food?”

“Are you using my tricks to help me?” she asks reminding him of his ‘rebellious’ phase in which he just drank beer and got so drunk Charlie had to stay up to take care of him. William never even knew so he didn’t actually know of his rebellion at all.

“My chance to make up to you?” he says tentatively, blushing in embarrassment.

She snorts, “I’m not drunk Mike.”

“That’s debatable.” he says which only makes her laugh harder.

“Do you want a drink?” she offers, holding up a half empty bottle of beer. “If you get drunk from this please never come to a bar.”

“I won’t get drunk from half a bottle of beer.” he tells her with a slightly offended expression and takes the bottle from her hand while she giggles.

“That’s debatable.” Charlie says.

“Wanna bet?” he asks, “I’ll give you five dollars and bragging rights if I get drunk first and you give me that if you do.”

“Fine,” she smiles, “I’m looking forward to getting those five dollars.”

-

In hindsight getting drunk out of their minds isn’t really worth five dollars and a funny story to tell their friends but both of them are too stubborn to admit that they’re not sober. On a better note Charlie’s not sad anymore. In fact, she feels ecstatic. It’s probably the twelfth time the song as played since Michael found her and each time she feels a sense of euphoria wash over her as the chorus plays. Or that might be the beer. She can’t tell; she’s never been drunk before.

The taste of beer was admittedly disgusting. Like, she’s surprised people fake IDs and go to jail to drink it. The trade-off was amazing though so she put up with and around her fourth bottle it assaulted her taste buds less and less until she merely associates it with the pleasant feeling of being drunk. But she stills vows to never touch a bottle again simply because it’s dangerous how good she feels drinking it.

“You look,” Michael says, flushed face and a drawling voice, “You look… I am looking. At you. What were you looking? What is there to look? Everything! You are everything! My everything is you!” he giggles like it was the funniest thing ever. It is. At least to their mushy drunk brains.

“You look like,” Charlie grins laughing to herself, “Sooooo drunk right now.”

“I’m not drunk!” he gasps, “No no no noooo - I am not drunk and you owe me five dollars.”

“Michael Michael Michael,” she giggles, completely ignoring him and tapping on his shoulder in beat with his name, “Mike, Mikey, Michael, bro look at me!”

“Charlie Charlie Charlie,” he repeats with a manic expression, “Charlotte, Lotty, my love! I’m looking at you”

“You are soooo funny.” Charlie tells him, slapping her hands on his cheeks and squishing them, “Like, everything you say is so dumb but it’s like funny dumb but also you’re smart too so it’s just even more funny!”

“ And you’re smart funny,” Michael replies with wide eyes, “But like - your jokes are too smart for me to understand so it’s double funny.”

“Awwww!” she coos, “Bro I’m so in love with you. But like, platonically in love with you. I’m going to marry you platonically. Like, even before we’re thirty I would marry you.”

“I would too!” Michael says and wraps his arms around her in a tight hug. God, he was so drunk. “I’ll have your babies Charlie. Platonically.”

“That’s not how babies work Michael.”

“It is with the power of friendship!” he states, “I’ll transcend the limits of male biology for you Charlie.”

“Michael!” she gasps, hugging him back tightly, “You would? For me?”

“Just for you! We’ll have like, three kids and a dog and a cat and huuuuge house really far away from Hurricane. Like, miles and miles away. And I’ll platonically marry you and have your babies made with the power of friendship.” Michael rambles only vaguely aware of how weird what he’s saying was.

“Gah, you’re so fucking cute!” she squeals. Charlie doesn’t ever squeal; if he weren't drunk out of his mind Michael would probably be very wary of her but they're both so so drunk.

Her eyes widen as the song plays the bridge and she grabs Michael’s shoulders.

You'll never know how many dreams

I've dreamed about you

Or just how empty they all seemed without you

“Do you know how to dance?” she asks, suddenly quite a bit serious.

“Of course I know how to dance,” Michael says, then raises an eyebrow, “Do you know how to dance?”

“Obviously I do or else I wouldn’t be asking you.”

“Why are you asking me then?”

“I’m asking you for a dance Mike.” she rolls her eyes.

“Ohhh!” he grins, “Of course I’ll dance with you my love.” Michael slips off the table and pulls Charlie by the waist to stand in front of him.

The chorus, a sound they both love so much begins to play. They grin down at each other, cheeks flushed from the beer they had both drank.

“Michael,” Charlie starts as they begin to sway to the song, “Isn’t ‘my love’ like, a romantic thing?”

He shrugs his shoulders, “I don’t know. I like calling you that though.”

“I think it’s cute.” she laughs, “And also like, it’d be so funny if someone thought we were dating.”

He snorts, “Oh my god have I told you about that time when Carlton thought we were dating for like, five months.”

“What?!” she giggles, “No fucking way man, when was that?”

Michael tells the story interrupted by his own laughter, his shoulders shaking as they continue to move back and forth, “So like, in freshman year he came up to me and was like ‘I know I shouldn’t ask but I’m a little hurt you never told me because we’ve known each other first grade so like, when did you and Charlie start dating?’ and then I was like, ‘what are you talking about man, when were we ever dating?’ and he was like ‘what? I thought you were!’ and it was really funny but it doesn’t sound funny right now.”

“No no no,” Charlie laughs, “That’s super funny what? Why did he think that?”

“I literally have no idea bro.”

“Maybe it’s because you call me ‘my love’.” Charlie says.

“Do you want me to stop?”

“No I said it was funny and cute so keep doing it.”

“Then I’ll keep doing it, my love.” he smiles

Kitty Kalen has a wonderful voice, Charlie thinks and the sound of the music accompanying her a blessing to her ears. They sway back and forth to the music and Charlie’s head droops onto his shoulder with a tired smile on her face.

“This is nice. Even if you’re not giving me the five dollars I deserve.” she says.

“I am so not drunk!” he gasps, “ You’re the one that’s drunk.”

“What if,” she starts, “What if we’re both drunk?”

“What?” Michael asks in bewilderment like it’s the strangest thing that could occur. Two people drunk at the same time? Totally unheard of.

“Oh my god!” she gasps giggling to herself, “Mike we’re both drunk!”

He laughs and his eyes widen, “Holy shit man, we’re fucking wasted!”

“At the same time!” Charlie adds mirroring his expression.

It’s honestly not even that funny but both Michael and Charlie dissolve into a laughing fit, clutching each other as they sink to their knees and lay their backs against the kitchen counter, head resting on the other.

Michael asks if he can sleep in her bed for the night - she says yes and they both turn the radio off and tiptoe down the hall to the room where Henry was sleeping. Charlie clutches Michael’s hand in her right hand and the Polaroid in her left and slowly as to not wake her father up, clambers under the covers of the guest bed. Michael shivers and hugs Charlie tight against him to warm himself up and she laughs softly and wraps her arms around him.

“Hey,” she says, “Wanna go check out the university tomorrow?”

“I don’t think they’d let us out alone.”

“They don’t have to know.” she smiles, “We can sneak out when they fall asleep.”

“Oh?” he laughs, “Is this the start of Charlotte Emily’s teenage rebellion?”

Charlie snorts, “This was your idea. I’m just making the plans.”

He chuckles, “We’ll go exploring tomorrow night, okay?”

“Okay.” she whispers and snuggles closer to his chest for warmth.

He falls asleep in minutes.