#anyway this review is pretty solid otherwise!

[jacquelinemerritt]

Final Fantasy VII: Machinabridged Episode 5 Review

Originally posted on October 22nd, 2015

Cloud prepares to dress as a woman, and nobody seems to mind.

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, it is likely that you’ll recall that in my review of Dragonball Z: Abridged Episode 15, I criticized Team Four Star for their handling of a character meant to represent trans and masculine women, who after having her gender revealed was subject to many demeaning jokes that sent the message of the inadequacy of women who don’t conform to traditional expectations of femininity (a critique that I still hold to).

And then, you might recall that KaiserNeko, one of the lead writers and editors for DBZA, reblogged my review of that episode, apologizing and explaining that they had mishandled the representation of women like Dodoria unintentionally, and their focus was solely on keeping the situation in character.

I bring this up now because Final Fantasy VII: Machinabridged Episode 5 does an excellent job at showing just how much Team Four Star has grown as writers since the release of DBZA Episode 15, wiping away any concerns I had about how they would handle this part of the story.

See, Final Fantasy VII contains, as an incredibly important part of its plot, a sequence where Cloud must cross-dress and pose as a woman in order to rescue Tifa, and I was worried that the over-the-top caricatures present throughout most of this series would carry over into their handling of the cross-dressing sequence, which could easily lead to harmful jokes at the expense of trans and gender-nonconforming people.

Takahata101 nails it from the very beginning though, and this happens in part due to the presence of Aerith, whose unbridled optimism and supportiveness has her leading Cloud gleefully through the transition process, where someone like Tifa or Barrett would have immediately rejected the idea.

It’s also incredibly meaningful that Cloud is the one to suggest that he cross-dress; while he makes the comment that he could do so off-handedly, it still suggests that posing as the other gender isn’t outside of his comfort zone, and the ease with which Aerith convinces him to go for it provides more evidence for this, and it is finally fully proven that Cloud desires this when he justifies cross-dressing in the terms of how much better than Tifa he would look while he saved her.

It’s also important to note the positive reactions of Giuseppe and the Church of Brodin to Cloud’s desire. Giuseppe has great dresses all around, but as soon as he realizes that it will be Cloud’s first dress, he abandons the rest of his work in order to make the best dress of his life just for him.

Similarly, the Church of Brodin are planning on forcing Cloud into a masculine challenge of strength to obtain a wig, but when they find out that he wants the wig for the sake of (in Aerith’s words) “becoming a woman,” they give it to him without the contest, claiming that it is not their place to question or challenge his lifestyle choice.

It’s interesting as well that the wig, which normally might be seen as an object denoting femininity, has been adopted by a church of ripped, masculine dudes as a symbol of their god’s masculinity, which is a fairly clever inversion of expectations.

Finally, when the members of the Church of Brodin give Cloud the wig, and Squaticles says that no one has the right to discriminate against another person’s lifestyle, Cloud says that he feels that context is needed. Now, I’m just a girl running a film criticism blog and mostly writing about abridged series, but I can’t help but wonder if, just perhaps, that’s a nod to my criticism of DBZA Episode 15. Maybe I’m being a bit presumptive here, but it would actually be pretty amazing if that were the case, as I’d have a definitive example of my writing having an effect on the world, and who doesn’t want that?

Rating: 5/5

If you enjoyed this review, consider supporting me on Patreon.

Stray Observations

I do feel I should add a brief addendum pointing out that crossdressing and being a trans or masculine woman are not the same, but the handling of gender non-conformity in this episode is still excellent.

Cloud: “Aerith, it would appear to me that Tifa has been kidnapped by a Mafia leader with the intention to give her the sex.” Aerith: “Oh no, she can’t do that ‘til she’s married!”

“Am I, the owner of my own store, sure that I have anything else besides drugs? Noooo, I’m pretty sure.”

[adobe-outdesign]

Lickitung line review

Lickitung is fairly forgotten about in the grand scheme of things, but I do like it quite a bit. The tongue thing is super in-your-face obvious and is a very unique theme (it also might be vaguely based off of an akaname yokai).

But what makes it work for me isn't just that it's a weird abstract creature with a tongue—it's that it's a very organic, cool-looking creature with a tongue. I love how its very vaguely salamander-esq in the face but is also bipedal, with a huge tail that mimics the tongue. It feels like something that could exist, and I always enjoy those kind of designs.

The stomach markings are also pretty interesting; it's an usual pattern that I don't think any other Pokemon sports, and they add a lot of shape to the body. Color-wise, pink is an obvious choice, and the cream works well to accent it. I do wish the pink was a bit deeper or more saturated as it feels a bit washed-out, but otherwise, this is a solid weird tongue thing.

Lickitung also had a beta evo design in the Spaceworld Demo. I like the rolled tongue, mustache, and markings... but the way it's some kind of Indian snake charmer(??) feels uncomfortable, and the body shape needed to change more.

Speaking of evos, Lickilicky is also as a weird tongue thing, but unfortunately it's not particularly well designed. My favorite thing about Lickitung is, as I just said, that it feels like an actual animal—but Lickilicky is anything but. The completely circular body, perfectly straight tongue, and stubby legs make it feel more like a toy.

But my other issue with it is that it doesn't really feel like a progression of Lickitung. Lickitung's thing is, surprise, the tongue, so you'd expect the tongue to be longer or more prominent in the design. Instead, it's shorter. Yes, it can presumably extend to be longer, but why would you de-emphasize the most important part of the design?

Similarly, the markings are reduced down, making them once again feel like a regression instead of a progression. They at least attempted to add something with the markings under the chin being more bib-like, but that's not enough to make the entire design work. Also, the wi-fi markings don't add much at this point and they would've worked at least a bit better in white.

You want to know an easy fix for this problem? Make Lickilicky the pre-evo. It feels weird to imagine Lickitung evolving into Lickilicky, but a Lickitung surrounded by little baby Lickilicky? Adorable! It would also make sense with things like the bib and the little curl of "hair" at the top.

If there's one thing I can give Lickilicky, it's that it at least has better colors than Lickitung. That, and the :P expression is kind of fun. Otherwise, though, I don't think this one works much at all.

(I also have to give a quick shoutout to @inprogresspokemon's Lickitung evo. This, to me, is a much better direction at all—it emphasizes and doubles down on the tongue paralysis thing and it still has a very organic body shape.)

Anyway, overall, Lickitung has a strong theme and a nice abstract design that conveys said theme well, but Lickilicky feels like a step backwards and would've been much better as a pre-evo. Maybe consider putting an everstone on this one.

[animereviewsbykyranskye]

My current top 15 Anime and why

Because why the fuck not. I'm doing top 15 so that I have some variety behind it. Otherwise I would just be gushing non stop XD

Apparently numbers go big now - AND THEY GO SMALLER IF YOU TRY TO TYPE IN THE SAME LINE AS THEM???

comparison:

15

15 -

DA HECK????

(Edit: I was going to colour all the numbers because I wanted a rainbow. WHY THE FUCK FOR THEY CHANGE TO SMALL WHEN YOU COLOUR THEM??????)

Guess the titles of the anime get a small heading. Anyways. Onto the actual list!

15

Technoroid OVERMIND

Ayo. Starting out with a really random one. So if anyone were to look at my Anilist then they might be a bit confused. I decided I'd keep movies out of here as well as anything I haven't specifically finished. Also takt op. Destiny needs a re evaluation.

Anyways. This premise is so sick and I feel like they managed it really well. The characters were all really fun and the music was fantastic which is honestly the most important thing about Idol shows. I really like idol shows but often struggle with the stupid drama in them that just leads to seasons upon seasons that didn't need to happen or wouldn't actually happen.

In this they're just androids. The fantasy twist works so well for the genre and I honestly don't know why it isn't done more often. This way they can bullshit the drama and it actually makes sense.

Honestly my favourite character was Kite. He was great and his voice always gave me shivers. Especially his piece in the closing. Damn.

I don't want to go into full reviews with this, rather just gushing about things I like and stuff. I really don't think this got the recognition it deserves - probably because of it's deviation from the norm - but it would be cool to get some sort of sequel.

(Edit: There's a manga releasing apparently. Imma check that out.)

14

UniteUp!

Continuing on with the trend of idol animes apparently. UniteUp! was so good. As I mentioned in my Reviews while I watch of the show, it felt so grounded and real that other idol shows just don't seem to capture. These were all real people with real problems dealing with real life.

I also like how we had such a large cast of characters but it never really felt overwhelming as they focused on group dynamics and specific individuals rather than trying to cram every single person into their own arcs.

Once again the music was fantastic and by god was this show pretty gay. Honestly I don't know what the sentiments of others are, but the Anela duo definitely weren't straight and neither were Akira and Daiki. That bath scene says it all.

Anyways. If you want a fun time with a really solid idol anime, please check it out. I saw earlier that we're getting a season two soon. I am so looking forward to it.

13

Trigun Stampede

Damn! I don't even know what to really say about this one. The visuals are absolutely stunning - there is no doubt about that. The score and the characters are excellent. And how dare they leave us on that cliff hanger.

I have absolutely no history with this story and still need to watch and read the originally but I am really looking forward to seeing how the story adapts between the three.

You can ask my partner. I've already said we're watching everything trigun related as soon as we are done with our current show.

I'm really looking forward to season two. And especially seeing how this all pans out. Apparently there will be tears according to the fandom. Concern.

12

Re-main

Damn this show came out of nowhere for me. I watched it quite awhile ago and have been meaning to rewatch it again.

The premise is definitely a sports anime but honestly so different. All because of one thing. The fact that he is an amnesiac is such a fascinating concept to work with - especially with how he was before (trying not to spoil - can't remember when this comes up in the anime)

And then the ending?? Damn. They seriously set up that cliff hanger and I really hope this show gets a sequel.

I really can't say too much about it without giving away some spoilers but damn does it change up the formula and do it so fucking well.

11

Given

Given is great. Such a pure but heartbreaking portrayal of love on one side with such conflicting but also nurturing views on the other. Having the different realtionships throughout this is really well done how they all bounce off of each other. Especially when they entertwine it with the music.

As it is said. That is how they communicate - through the music.

I'm busy catching up with the manga and really hope the anime continues with it.

Also the fucking is just fucking gorgeous. It has no write to hit you that hard.

Also - something else that shouldn't be allowed to hit you that hard. Damn Mafuyu has had a difficult past. We love how he learns to heal and grow with Uenoyama at his side.

Anyways, moving on.

10

Bakuten!!

Okay. Who said a sports anime could be this pretty.

I love the art style and the music throughout all of this. I love the portayal and the evolution of these character - seriously all their arcs are great. The interactions of the team is so tangible and real.

I watch a lot of sports anime and I often struggle with some of the drama used within the sports - it feels like the only thing that ever fuels the story is the matches. Whereas in Bakuten - the character seriously fuel the story. You can understand their motivations much more than just - I want to play this sport and be the best!

I also feel like they really captured everything really well in the movie. The whole concept of wanting to sore is great and really well executed.

I also love the interactions they have with the other team. It's not just a once off competition or practice match that they face each other. We actually get tangible characters for the whole team and see how much they two teams are similar to one another. It's a very healthy rivalry that isn't normally this expanded on in sports anime.

9

Sasaki and Miyano

Yesssssss. These two are just absolutely amazing. Their whole story arc and relationship is just tooth rottingly sweet. They bounce off of each other so well.

And I love the fact of how slow the actual story is. They meet at the start of Miyanos first year (from what I know - I still need to read the novels) and sasaki's second and they only end up confessing just before graduation happens. It really plays out well and is so healthy.

There is no problematic elements like in so many BL stories which is such a breath of fresh air. And the fact that sasaki is very specific about making sure to maintain boundaries to ensure that miyano is comfortable is also excellent.

On a slightly different note - I still need to see the Hirano and Kagiura movie. Been dying to watch it. I've been keeping up to date with both manga and both of these stories are amazing. I love the dichotomy of the two stories and how they are coming to their own realisations of their feelings in honestly very different ways.

I also recently watched the dub of the anime due to some videos on tiktok. Fucking hell it is absolutely hilarious. Kellen Goff as Sasaki has no reason for being that good. Seriously. Damn.

8

Link Click

On a completely different note. Damn this one makes you questions your own morals and reality as you know it.

I really don't want to get into this one much as I do believe watching it blind is the best way to go.

The art style is fantastic and that opening hits like a truck it is so good. The characters just click (pun not intended) and you just understand their motivations and don't know which side to side with most of the time. It brings about such high moral dilemmas that will seriously mess with your brain sometimes and there is one episode that will likely make you cry.

Anyways. Season 2 has just started airing and I am so ready for it.

7

Buddy Daddies

Why did a show about two queer platonic dudes who adopt a child while beings assassins hit so damn hard.

The show jumps between episodes with backstory and episodes with them just being good dads and it is balanced so well. This anime won't end up getting a sequel most likely with how it ended but damn I wouldn't say no to one.

Rei is my favourite character and I relate to him far too much. His interactions with the world are so fascinating and his whole arc with Miri is honestly some of the best media I've seen.

I absolutely loved watching this show weekly and it always brightened up my day when I realised a new episode would be up.

If you would like further thoughts on this one then check the Reviews while I watch on it for more chaos.

6

No Game No Life

So. This was the first ever anime that I ever watched. It was a random recomendation from a friend. Look at where we are today.

This show is honestly just so fun. The characters are silly and the whole plot is just absolute chaos. I really enjoy the games aspect and how it was all incorporated into the world.

I can't even really say much about it. It is just a guilty pleasure of mine and will always hold a special place in my heart.

Also. Please can it just get a second season already.

5

Assassination Classroom

So. Unlike everything else on the list - this one I only finished really recently. My partner and I were watching it together. And to put it out there straight away. I cried. That ending was far too emotional.

I really enjoyed the humour throughout the whole thing as well as the constant underlying dread of the whole situation.

They also really played out Koro-senseis backstory really well. The teasing to it was excellent. I must say though that one of the twists seriously came out of left field. Like damn.

I've just recently bought the boxset and am reading through the manga. Once again. It's absolutely amazing.

Also the openings of them all jumping are absolutely fucking hilarious and you can't tell me otherwise.

If you want to know what officially sold me on the show was just in the first episode. (Note we watched in dub)

Don't ask me why but I found this to be the most hilarious thing ever. The absurdity and the line delivery was magnificent. I annoy my partner by quoting it atleast once a day.

4

Life Lessons with Uramichi Oniisan

Speaking of comedies. This show has no right to be this good. The absudist dead pan comedy in the middle of whats meant to be a TV show is such a random premise but just works so well.

Due to the nature of the show, the characters are extremely relateable. I especially love Kumatani and Kikaku.

If your on the same side of anime tiktok that I am then you have definitely seen/heard snippets of the dub.

I think this was the first anime that I originally watched in sub and then tried it in dub and actually enjoyed it. (I often find that whatever I originally watched it in is the only one I can watch it in - it's very difficult for me to change it)

The voice acting on both sides just works perfectly for the show. And that final episode and how they did it was the best thing ever.

Please just give it a try.

3

Angel Beats

Okay. Time for a hard hitter. This comedy like assassintaion classroom is fucking excellent but will make you cry, like damn.

In complete and utter contrast to No game no life, this was the second anime I had ever watched. I had found a video that gave some suggestions and thought I would give this one a try. When I say it destoryed me, I mean it literally. I constantly think about the end of this and I absolutely love revisiting it.

The twist and turns along the way are fascinating and I love how each one alters the characters and the narrative. Each of the characters feel unique - even the lesser developed side characters - with fascinating and complex backstories.

The whole thing just makes you question your own place in life.

2

Moriarty the Patriot

Another one I just randomly tried because I saw a video on tiktok. The first episode immediately pulled me in. I thought it was just going to be some simple detective story (At the time I didn't know much about Sherlock Holmes and who Moriaty was so I didn't have any of that to guide me into this story.) But nope.

I keep saying this but in this one I really mean it. The characters are built so well. The dichotomy between William and Sherlock - as the fandom would probably agree - is just amazing. How they bounce off of each other - i don't even know how to really descirbe it.

Honestly just go watch it.

And if you enjoyed the anime - please go check out the manga too. If the anime was done well - then the manga is done to lamost perfection.

This show was what got me into reading and then eventually buying manga. I now have every single one that is out.

1

Yuri!!! on ICE

Did I make the title gay? Yes.

Okayyyyy. This is just going to be me going on about how much I love this show. Bare with me.

So I was in an anime watching slump just before I picked up this show. I had been seeing some videos popping up talking about it and decided to give it a try (this was in 2020)

I immediately fell in love with this show. Literally everything about it. I ended up rewatching it three times over the course of a week. It got to a point where I was so upset that there wasn't more content for it that I just cried for half a day. (Ask my partner - it was chaos)

This show is the reason I now read fanfiction - all because I found a way to technically have more content for it.

This show holds such an important place in my heart that I sincerely cannot express it properly.

If you've never watched it - go give it a try. It would mean a lot - and hopefully one day we might get a season two.

----

Thanks for reading, if you managed to get to this point. I find it interesting how my explanations managed to slowly get shorter throughout the list as I just started becoming more emotional than factual.

I hope you enjoyed it and maybe grabbed a recommendation or two. If you'd like to know more or hear me ramble on more about anything in particular then please let me know.

[pointless-soap]

Review - Public Goods

While visiting my family for the holidays, my dad told me that he had gotten me an Airbnb nearby his apartment. That way, my girlfriend and I wouldn't be sharing the couch with two rambunctious dogs. My girlfriend and I are very grateful for this, as we appreciate having our own space like this.

When we arrived yesterday, I took a look in the bathroom and noticed that the hand soap, the shampoo, the conditioner, and the body wash are all the same brand: Public Goods.

(I'm only including the one picture, because it's all you really need. All the other bottles are basically the same, but instead of saying Hand Soap, they say Shampoo, Conditioner, or Body Wash.)

First things first, I have to admit that the graphic design of the bottle does nothing to endear me to the soap. I'm not a huge fan of minimalist design. I think it's boring. I like clutter. I like when there's a bunch of little stuff on bottles. I think bottle's should have word searches and crosswords goddammit. This bottle has the brand, the type of soap, the volume, the slogan "It's all good", and nothing else. Where's the pizazz? Where's the fun? It's gone.

Hand Soap

Anyway, onto the soap itself. Despite the first impression, the hand soap is actually pretty solid. I don't mean in terms of matter. It is a liquid, don't worry. I mean that it does the job well. It doesn't really lather well, which is disappointing, but it doesn't clump up at all, it spreads easily, and it wipes away grime. It works! A good sign for soap. Not much to say for the smell though. It's pretty inoffensive, subtle, standard soap stuff.

7/10

Shampoo

Not gonna lie. It was pretty disappointing. Felt like I was just using the hand soap on my hair. It didn't lather, which is like the one thing I expect shampoo to do? There's gotta be suds in there, otherwise it's no fun. I even went and grabbed an extra squirt to see if maybe I could rub more in, and all I got was disappointment. Anyway, it's fine otherwise. Smells pretty nice, but again not like anything in particular. That's it. Also it pretty effectively killed my curls, but that's normal for shampoo. It's why I only really shampoo once or twice a week.

5/10

Conditioner

I didn't use the conditioner. I have curly hair and use a specific conditioner for it, recommended to me by my sister who went to beauty school and knows these things. I didn't want to completely kill my curls, so I just used that.

?/10

Body Wash

At first, I was optimistic. It came out of the bottle thick, which is great for a body wash. Smelled nice. Was a different texture than the shampoo and hand soap. Fantastic. Pretty quickly though, I became disappointed. I don't know if it's the brand or if whoever owns the Airbnb did this, but it honest to god seemed whatever down. Just fell right off like sauce off of penne lisce, the worst pasta noodle. I guess I'm clean, so that worked, but it was genuinely disappointing.

4/10 (Again, it might've been the owners who watered down the soap though, so if Public Goods wants to send me fresh bottle, they can DM me and I'll update the review.)

Summary

Public Goods seems to me to be a decent company. They talk a lot about environmentalism and sustainable practices, which I hold to be a very important topic. I hope what they say is true. But what it says on the soap bottles does not seem to be.

"It's all good" the soap bottles say, right near the bottom, in tiny print. I would say it's more like "it's fine" or "it works" because those are technically true.

But the hand soap was pretty good.

[spookfished]

media roundup february

hi everybody :3 i didnt really read a lot in february i was busy 'doing school' and 'looking for employment.' sad! i have spring break coming up so im planning on using that time to read a bunch (and also apply for more jobs -_-) this post and previous can be found on my neocities!

books:

revenant gun by yoon ha lee: the last book in the hexarchate series, starting with ninefox gambit. (slightly edited from my discord review, SPOILERS INCOMING). in machineries of empire, there a disconnect between what the audience craves and what the book is willing to give them-- for example, things like Whats up with the calendar + the hexarchate, why did jedao do all that, etc. this works in the books favor (imo) by increasing tension, creating a sense of discovery, and avoiding clunky exposition.

however in the two sequels it expands not just to what the audience wants but also what they like. care about? some big examples are the weight of the remembrances* and less cheris, but also stuff like jedaos focus. which isnt bad like i like jedao. but like, if you Dont you sure do get a lot of him. also did anyone actually like brezan sorry. hes fine like for example with the end of a memory called empire, when the protag (forgot her name sorry) loses her brain buddy, it feels like a second coming of age almost--her brain buddys been a crutch but now she gets to stand on her own (albeit as a changed person, with brain buddys influence). vs cheris who kinda starts to feel like a cameo character who literally fucks off for nine years??? there is also a sort of ongoing sense of "these sacrifices for the greater good are ok (if sad) and these are not" whihc ngl sometimes feels pretty arbitrary to me. and given that machineries of empire focuses on like the Littlest most downtrodden people it really is wild yhat we dont see a lot of civilian life? anyways i enjoyed it and i think its worth finishing out the trilogy but it wasnt as satisfying as i could have hoped (ALSO NINEFOX GAMBIT IS A REALLY FUN SOLID READ. I LIKED IT A LOT)

*the rememberances are a set of ritualized tortures that create a power structure that literally powers a lot of the empire's technology. this is a very cool concept! a big part of jedao and cheris' rebellion is about making a place that Doesnt have to run on torture. except that like, besides the intellectual knowledge that Torture Is Bad as a reader i didnt really feel that invested in this? like we only get to See a remembrance happening midway thru book 3. im not like advocating for torture porn or anything but it seems weird to have that be the focal thing when neither cheris nor jedao had any scenes where they were affected by it (and so the audience didnt have anything like that either). idk it kinda just stood out to me. like yes i care about these characters but why should i care about This specifically

hexarchate stories by yoon ha lee: an anthology set in the world of machineries of empire, expanding the world and fleshing out some stories. this was pretty solid! theres a wide range of stories and lengths, and i liked the variety :3 its like a little charcuterie board. (yoon ha lee's bias for shuos jedao really stands out here though..) its kinda essential reading to me imo though bc otherwise the ending of revenant gun isnt that satisfying :| lol anyways once again if youve read ninefox gambit check it out! spoilers for the whole series tho

exordia by seth dickinson: hard scifi about agency, impossible choices, and how they shape you. also, international geopolitics! like ninefox gambit, exordia demands your attention and concentration. you kinda have to read it at a time when you have brainpower to spare. however, exordia rewards everything that you put into it :3 i ended up learning so many random facts during this book… like AGL meaning above ground level. i feel like i need to read a book about democratic confederalism now also. a couple of my other friends read this book and got lost in the large cast and intricate web of events--i didnt have as much of an issue but u might need a piece of paper or sth. exordia is a book that's dense enough to feel like three books, and that can be good or bad. seth dickinson has this really spare, concise prose that leaves a lot to your imagination but also like. can sum up a person or situation in just a couple sentences? and that leaves a lot of room for the reader to investigate which i like :3 hm what else to say…. i really liked clayton (clayton!!!!) but i found erik super annoying ymmv. the ending kinda leaves you at a loss which i honestly kinda like? like yeah obv a sequel would be nice but i like it the way it is. anyways not for the faint of heart but id still recommend<3

accidentally engaged by farah heron: f/m romance aww so cute <3 really nice contemporary romance which tosses together a bunch of tropes--arranged romance, fake dating, baking together--into something that actually works really well! the two leads were very charming and i liked reading about the good food. i liked the way the protagonist's almost-stereotypical portrait of a loving but strict south asian family (am i allowed to say this) gets fleshed into a group of honestly kinda bizarre people that love her and that reena can genuinely connect with. yay family! overall, not especially memorable to me personally but still enjoyable. rec if youre into contemporary romance

last breath: the limits of adventure: realistic fiction (?) about what it feels like to drown, die of dehydration, fall from a cliff, etc. lots of research, very thorough! (well sometimes they live and sometimes they dont). an expansion of this absolutely fantastic article about hypothermia. honestly none of the stories quite live up to this one imo but this is still a really solid and exciting read! i couldnt put it down! although it does have a touch of the orientalism that you get from like, a lot of extreme sports circles lol. i would definitely recommend reading the article, and maybe read the book if it especially interests you.

video games:

pokemon legends of arceus: a pokemon game set in the past that breaks the mold by letting you dodge roll. my opinions here coincide pretty closely with the dunkey video, which is that this is a really fun game that is also literally half finished. controls are clunky, story is paper thin, graphics are fucked, overworld is extremely empty but its also just very fun?? it took over my life for like two weeks and i missed class???? anyways i would not get this at full price but if you can borrow it from a friend its super interesting to experience. im looking forward to the kalos one :3

slay the princess: a horror? romance? visual novel about saving the princess, slaying tbe princess, and everything in between featuring the vocal chops of that one magnus archives guy. dudeee this is so fun! i think its very kind to the guy inside of me who is Embarrassingly Anxious about any and all video game choices that can like, affect the narrative. lmfao its fun to fit in a couple runs or two between other things, but i did start losing track of what previous paths id taken after a bit of a gap. however!!! i would definitely think about playing this game if you like visual novels or Narrative or Loops! or girls who kill lol theres a free demo if you want to try it out

movies:

velocipastor: action movie about a priest who turns into a velociraptor to punish the wicked!!!! so fucking cool a lot of love put into this (low budget) movie made me so sad i dont speak cantonese (? at least i think thats what it was) watch this with friends

music:

Gato by nobonoko: really fun 80s synth jazz? album written by two fictional gay furries. no wait come back ok this is one of those things i got recommended by youtube and then actually listened to it a bunch of times its just very soothing and nice :3 ive been listening to jazz pretty much my whole life so i have a huge bias. also im a sucker for fictional bands eg splatoon… also the art is so cute?? those two guys?? its hard to pick a favorite song but i think i like the titular gato! also theres a bunch of other stuff made by the same two artists

option by Crosses: i totally forgot what the genre for this is but its like when metal guys are like i need to have a song for my metal wedding. song recommended by neil -_- anyways very sappy im fond of it nonetheless. i definitely did think it said "can you promise me to the grave"

Roy by Idles: from british rock band idles new album tangk! im going to be honest i did not like this album as much as some of the other ones by idles, but thats ok! hmm when i play this song out loud during crew shifts i feel embarrassed. but i really like seeing how idles' vocalist's voice has evolved over time! the way hes branched out into more melodic and belty stuff over time is very fun. the prechorus + chorus are very fun to sing along to as well :3 its just a fun song

anyways if you read any portion of this thanks as always :3 what else to say.. i made pandesal recently and its been my only successful bread that i can remember. go me! anyways see you guys in a bit

[aurorawest]

Reading update

White Trash Warlock by David R Slayton - 4.75/5 stars

Urban fantasy with a protagonist from a trailer park, who, for bonus points, got sectioned by his older brother as a teen. Daddy issues, mommy issues, and brother issues, what's not to like? I ordered everything else by this author I could find when I finished the book, including the other two books in this series.

The Fascinators by Andrew Eliopulos - DNF

Boring.

The Revolutionary and the Rogue by Blake Ferre - DNF

Boring, with the added crime of actual plot happening but still, somehow, nothing actually happening. I kept reading whole pages and realizing I had no idea what I'd just read.

The Red Scholar's Wake by Aliette de Bodard - DNF

OMFG CAN I CATCH A BREAK. This was such a disappointing DNF, too, because I'd really been looking forward to it. One of the characters is a spaceship and it bills itself as a space opera? Yes please. But after the initial marriage of convenience setup, it's just all a bunch of pointless, boring conversations. Nothing happens. I flipped ahead. Still nothing happening. Not a space opera but definitely cozy sci-fi, which I think I officially hate.

Honeytrap by Aster Glenn Gray - 5/5 stars

An FBI agent and a GRU agent get assigned to work a case together in 1959 and they fall in looooove. But oof, this book was so good. I'm not sure I've ever had a time skip hit me in the gut so hard. I really can't recommend this book enough, it fits squarely in my niche interest of mid-century America or Britain m/m romance. I think Natasha Pulley also awakened something in me with The Half Life of Valery K, because I seem to be a sucker for gay Soviet men. Speaking of, if you liked The Half Life of Valery K, I bet you'll like this too! Anyway, read this, but be prepared to be hurt by it.

Ordinary Monsters by JM Miro - 4/5 stars

X-men meets Strangers Things with a dash of English boarding school, set in Victorian Britain.

Human Enough by ES Yu - DNF

Promising until it devolved into boring, pointless conversations and tumblr posts on neurodivergence.

Olympic Enemies by Rebecca J Caffery - DNF

I put this down on page 12 and my wife grabbed it to flip through it, cackling at the amateurish prose.

Frost Bite by J Emery - 4.5/5 stars

Snowed-in cabin fic with an enemies to lovers romance between a vampire and a (former) vampire hunter. It was cute and a quick read.

The Lost Apothecary by Sarah Penner - DNF

Very Not Like Other Girls. Also read a review that said pregnancy was a huge focus of the book, and that's a squick for me.

Reverie by Ryan La Sala - 3.75/5 stars

This book didn't quite live up to the promise of its beginning (missing memories, bizarre disruptions to time and space) and the writing was a little twee at times, but overall I enjoyed it. This was the author's debut, so I suspect subsequent books will probably be better. I did feel like the teenage main characters were weirdly inured to death, which also contributed to me knocking of a quarter of a star from what would otherwise have been a solid 4 star book.

All Souls Near & Nigh by Hailey Turner - 3/5 stars

If you like The Tarot Sequence by KD Edwards, this series might be worth picking up. I will say, though, that it's nowhere near as good. I think it's a combination of pacing and too many characters that detracts from my enjoyment of this series. This is the second book and I enjoyed it more than the first, probably because I sort of remembered the massive cast of characters from the first one. It's one of those things where I really don't think they're all necessary and some should be combined with others. The pacing is also...weird. It's pretty much nonstop action. At one point I think the main character drove back and forth between various crime scene locations and his office like 5 times in a day.

That said! Despite the issues, clearly I still picked up book 2, and I'll probably read book 3 at some point. I really like the two main characters.

[skylights422]

New X-Men '97 tomorrow! I am very excited! But I also had meant to make more posts reviewing the first three episodes. It was going to be multiple posts over different topics, but I am short on time and organizational energy, so I am just gonna make two posts over the biggest topics: The Romance Drama, and The Plot. Romance drama first! It got Long, so it's under a cut. xD (And a quick disclaimer that any negative opinions on the canon writing of couples doesn't mean I dislike people for shipping any of it; I almost never ship anything personally just as a matter of personal preference, but am very much a Ship And Let Ship/Don't Like Don't Read kind of person)

First, I will just say that the Jean/Scott/Logan drama was...always the most boring and confusing part to me in the 90s show? I just didn't feel like they did enough to show why Wolverine was SO in love with her when it seemed like they never spent any time together normally or had any major bonding moments? So I felt like he was just pining based on appearance and the fact they were teammates, which...is fine I guess but not the sweeping, dramatic unrequited love it was always portrayed as.

(I mean Wolverine was so torn up about them getting married he REFUSED TO ATTEND and instead spent time trying to kill an illusion version of Scott in the Danger Room, that's. Very dramatic! And for what? Maybe they covered it a little bit in an episode I haven't re-watched yet but I remember Past Me at least not finding the explanation impressive enough lollll)

So, I'm not...super looking forward to more of it in this new show, but also expecting it since it was always such a feature. I'd rather not have Jean kinda date Logan just because she's mad at Scott and Logan wants to? But it won't shock me. By and large I have made peace with my dislike for that particular love triangle since I'm otherwise such a fan of both series. (And so far anyways Logan has been a little less weird about his unrequited feelings even if they're still pretty obvious)

THEN we have the Rogue and Magneto romance. This one I have had more mixed feelings on. My kneejerk reaction was confusion and dislike - I didn't know until I looked it up after the episode that they were together in the comics, and since they weren't in the previous show, it felt...really random. (Also I am just not much a fan of couples with large age gaps, obviously Rogue is an adult and can do what she wants, it's just not my cup of tea. Plus Rogue and Gambit is one of maybe, like...five? Couples in media? That I have any investment in AS a romantic couple lol, but mostly I was just not looking forward to more romantic drama in general since it's just not something I tend to enjoy much)

Now I have two opinions. One is simply that I am Over feeling bothered by it and just curious to see what they do with it, since Rogue and Magneto do have some compelling thematic reasons to have scenes together anyways. And Rogue and Gambit definitely COULD have a mature conversation about it, which would actually be pretty neat.

Now my main quibble is that it was introduced so suddenly, and with so little explanation. As a general rule, I do NOT consider 'it happened in the source material' to be a valid excuse for anything in an adaptation unless it also makes sense within the established lore/characterization/etc. of the adaptation itself. A Doylist explanation existing does not remove the need for a solid Watsonian one, and if there just...isn't a Watsonian explanation, then I feel it is lazy writing at best, actually terrible writing if done badly enough.

There's definitely still time for them to give some kind of flashback or explanation for Rogue and Magneto though! You can introduce new aspects to character's pasts, in general. So I am holding out my final opinion to see if they do that, and in what way.

On a smaller, technically still hypothetical note, next for romance drama we have: Morph crushing on Wolverine. I do agree that it's extremely possible, even likely, that Morph seeming Interested in Wolverine in this version is deliberate - I mainly say hypothetical because I have seen some VERY overtly queercoded stories/scenes/etc. be written genuinely by accident, and at this point I'm really not sure how it was intended (like, if it's meant to be anything bigger than the scene itself or not).

And once again, I have mixed feelings on it. On one hand, having an openly gay character in an X-Men cartoon is good! It's nice to see some diversity in orientation. And Morph makes sense since they are the closest to a blank slate as you can get with a pre-established character, only being in nine episodes total of the original series - very spread out ones, as well.

But well, there's two reasons I feel kind of egh about it. One is that nearly all the Established Duos that got a lot of attention in the original show were romantic ones, and as someone who is fundamentally more invested emotionally in non-romances, I really liked the thought of having a best friend duo to fixate on. (We do still have Magneto and Xavier but XAVIER IS DEAD RIGHT NOW SO IT ONLY HALF COUNTS)

The other is that it...would almost definitely be another unrequited crush. Which for one, is just drama that isn't interesting to me. But also I dunno if 'sad gay bravely accepts never getting with the love of their life' is amazing rep for...friendships OR gay people??? Like you could write it so that Morph is genuinely fine being 'just' friends, and maybe in an ideal world that would even kick Wolverine into considering he could maybe be More Normal About Jean. But I worry about their friendship falling apart or it being made out to be 'not enough' to Morph and ultimately just making everyone look bad (and also if they push too hard on the Sad Morph Angle I feel like it could just be another case of villainizing people for not returning affections which I just, REALLY HATE)

SO I'M ON EDGE ABOUT IT. Possibly they won't do much with the concept at all, which I'd frankly prefer. Possibly they'll find a way to write the one-sided romance that is actually considerate to both sides and doesn't destroy their friendship. Possibly they'll even introduce other gay couples somewhere in the show so the rep for it isn't all riding on Morph's shoulders! But I am also very aware how easy it would be to do this wrong. SO WE'LL SEE.

[morethanaloveinterest]

A Conflicted Review of Leia's Costumes in ROTJ

Let's talk about the highs and lows of Leia's final costumes in the original trilogy.

Kicking it out of the fucking park here - just look at her! Leia is a bounty hunter! Cannot even describe how much this meant to me as a kid. I love how it still has a lovely silhouette without actually being something only a woman could/would wear. The poncho belts are great, is what I'm saying. And the boots! I remember the gloves viscerally - I need them. Anyway, she wears this in the first scene of ROTJ, where she negotiates effectively with Jabba the Hutt. And then frees Han from carbonite before she is unmakes and we see who she really is.

Female representation: 10/10 Listen, I love a pretty dress at least as much as the next girl. But I thought it was a big deal to just get her in some pants in the last movie. Now she is not only in pants but is dressed like the baddest outlaws in the galaxy. Love it!

Practicality: 10/10 I don't know what bounty hunters need to be able to do, but she looks pretty prepared for anything that might happen to her. She's protected from the sun and blaster fire, she has a helmet, her boots are great, could not love it more.

And then such a devastating change. I mean, great job Carrie Fisher, on your workout routine. But this reeks of some executive complaining that there wasn't any eye candy in these movies. In any case, obviously Leia did not choose to wear this and is a slave of that disgusting slug. It is a lot like what the other slave girl wore. But it opens up a lot of questions about the misogyny of the galaxy that was definitely avoided in the other movies. I do like that Han never actually sees her wear this, but her brother grabs her to escape, so it's a little weird.

Female representation: 2/10 I can't say it's the worst thing I've ever seen a lady be forced to wear, but it's definitely up there. And to think I praised this series for how they avoided the bikinis common for ladies in scifi at the time.

Practicality: 0/10 All that skin exposed in the desert would be deadly. And the skirt thing would get caught on stuff while the rest of her is subject to all manner of scratches or bruises.

Whew, much better. Every human character on this mission is basically wearing the same thing, which is fun. It is camouflaged as they go through the forest and everything about it is designed to help with that purpose. I like that Leia does not get a unique spin on the male costumes - she just wears the same thing. With her hair braided up under her helmet.

Female representation: 10/10 Perhaps not as good as the bounty hunter outfit, but still just as great. She matches her brother and the other dudes, and it's nice to be egalitarian.

Practicality: 10/10 At least as practical as her costume on Hoth, love that for her. The boots are great for tramping through the woods, the poncho protects her arms as well as hiding her weapons, her helmet is definitely a good choice.

For child me, this was the best thing Leia ever wore. Or anyone ever wore; I loved this dress so much. Finally, she is wearing a flattering dress that looks crazy comfortable. Her hair is down at last - there's a reason she wears this again after they have defeated the Empire. It's the Happily Ever After outfit and it's wonderful.

Female representation: 10/10 I am biased, possibly, but I think it does a great job showing Leia as feminine as she navigates befriending the Ewoks and her relationship with Han.

Practicality: 8/10 I mean, boots and a more solid skirt would help. Or having her hair out of the way. But otherwise she's pretty prepared to do whatever she might need to do.

This is what Leia wears for the final battle on Endor, the end of the war. Presumably, the earlier outfit was just a poncho over this, but whatever. It deviates from Leia's signature color but is not too far from it. The structure of the shirt is not much different from 80s fashions at the time, when women's clothes were intentionally designed to mimic men's. And it's nice to have Leia in the field during the final battle instead of just watching from the sidelines like in the first movie.

Female representation: 10/10 Like I said, she mostly kicks it out of the park (in general and in this movie). This is a great costume for her to wear in battle and it fits her style while still being like what her peers are wearing. At least in terms of design.

Practicality: 9/10 I had to take it down a notch since there is no helmet, but it is still pretty fantastic. Perfect for the final battle in the woods.

If you enjoyed this, check out my Star Wars for the Girlies Series (New episode on Leia!)

[eemcintyre]

"Excessive Force" (1993) review

Bc ya girl finally got her fingies on a DVD and was able to watch it in more than 6 pixels 😌

I don’t care what the haters say- I am so very completely HERE for the hair and the earring 👏🏻

The fact I went into this the first time not knowing he wrote it until the opening credits and SCREAMING

Speaking of the writing, overall, I appreciate his attempts at humor and the good twist near the end, but at the same time hon WHY were you writing stuff like Terry’s dating a model (with NO personality or reason to be there- guess even he’s not immune to “men writing women” smh 😔😆) and “It’s game time, baby” making me absolutely cringe myself away AAAAAAAGGGGHHHHH 😤

But I might forgive him anyway bc **that one scene** (if you know you know); you have to be at least a bit of a kinky motherfucker to write smth like that and you can’t convince me otherwise ���🫠

Plus the top-tier kitten content- in this house we love a man who loves cats

That one guy in the beginning complaining about his denim jacket getting ruined like BRUH maybe don’t wear it to a mafia drug raid?? But what do I know 🙃

I’m always a slut for the roundhouse and wheel kicks (don’t ask me which is which bc I don’t know, but I read somewhere that’s what they’re called and that person sounded like they knew more than me)

Also speaking of things I’m a slut for- the jazz piano has me melting to my fucking knees 😍💕 fun fact: jazz is also my favorite genre, so this inclusion to the plot, although wildly out of place and unnecessary, *chef’s kiss* 🤌🏻

Ok but can we please talk about how tiny girlypop Charlotte Lewis is in comparison to him?? Also I looked it up and she's 5'6 and I'm only 5'2 and the resulting mental imagery is making my head spin and my stomach do feats of acrobatics

Honestly this movie is such a guy-type movie to write, like I swear only a man could have written it. between the men writing women shit I discussed above to the cringe one-liners and the almost-constant gratuitous violence over anything resembling, idk, character development...? A+ fantastic content

It is so entertaining to me that Terry's emo ass in his all-black layered outfits drives a fkin pastel yellow car

Honestly, if you don’t overanalyze it and are solely there for a pretty 6’5 man kicking people, holding a kitten, and playing jazz piano, solid 5/10.

[clatterbane]

Danzig Roulette Mystery

(Retrying this one out of stubbornness with an archive link, since now Tumblr seems to be choking on uploads that include any manually formatted links to Reddit. 🙄 Thank goodness for Type Machine, which I actually installed on recommendation like 10 years ago when Tumblr mobile was just randomly eating all kinds of reblogs.)

At any rate, the only actual "mystery" there appears to be some Amazon fulfillment weirdness with the vinyl reissue of one album.

But, I saw that post and realized that I somehow didn't recall ever listening to Danzig: 6:66 (from '99). Fixing that now, and it's still not ringing a lot of bells.

No real mystery there either; the man has been nothing if not prolific over the years, and I was focusing on other shit through the late '90s-early 2000s. And also zonked out pretty hard on a series of meds for a misdiagnosis. I honestly do not remember some things that I would otherwise. Still thought I had probably heard the whole back catalogue by this point, though.*

Anyway, it's not bad, with a very period post-grunge "somebody's been listening to the beginnings of nu-metal" vibe that I really wasn't expecting from those guys. Not pulling it off badly, either.

(Mini-update: 2002's 777: I Luciferi is going even harder with the nu-metal influences. Gotta keep it current, I suppose! I am also not entirely sure who all was in the band then, and don't particularly feel like entering that particular musical spiderweb right now.)

Glenn Danzig really does NOT appear on any hypothetical list I might come up with of artists who seem like they'd be fun to have a couple of drinks with. But, he has been turning out a lot of solid material for like 45 years now.

_________

* With the notable exception of 2020's Danzig Sings Elvis. Which is a thing that exists, and garnered a review in the New Yorker. Haven't quite worked up the nerve, as unintentionally hilarious as the concept may sound. Dude may have been trying a little too hard to channel Punk-metal Elvis for a good while, but...

[watching-pictures-move]

Movie Review | The Brave One (Jordan, 2007)

I didn't get around to it at the time, but I do remember being sort of interested in seeing this back in my teenage years. In part because Ebert wrote a three-and-a-half-star review and because I thought Foster looked cool on the DVD cover pointing a gun, but also in part because of the genre. At the time I still hadn't wrapped my head around the idea of genres not being inherently good or bad, so the idea of a revenge thriller seemed enticing because revenge = dark and gritty. Also, the idea of an elevated revenge thriller seemed especially enticing because I was still somewhat beholden to ideas of "good" taste, and enjoying a straight ahead genre exercise seemed a little too base while enjoying something like this was a bit more acceptable because it was making baser subject matter material better. These days I'm happy to watch Charles Bronson blow people away in movies that seem patched together with scotch tape, but back then I was a bit of a pretentious doofus. I'm sure it's real exciting to hear me reminisce about the time I considered watching a movie but didn't follow through.

Anyway, I don't think anyone really thinks about this one anymore, but I liked it enough. Jodie Foster acts so little these days that it's nice to go back and watch any of her roles and see how good she could be, and she unsurprisingly brings a lot of depth and texture to this. Honestly, it would have been kind of interesting to see her give a performance of this calibre in something schlockier for lack of a better word (I'm thinking like Robert Forster in Vigilante, which for the record is a very well directed movie, but you get what I'm saying). This is of course about the psychological toll of becoming a vigilante, but I'll say that Neil Jordan does not condescend to the genre like you might have gotten with, like, Michael Haneke at the helm. The violence does feel visceral and there are some interesting, if heavy handed, visual choices, even if they're undermined by the slickness of the 2000s studio craft.

There are also stabs at sketching out New York City as a melting pot, mostly by changing up the ethnicities of the criminals Foster blows away. This is also a movie that conveys the heroine's transformation through wardrobe, as she goes from dressing like a high schooler to dressing like an adult. The call-in radio show scene presages a similar element in the 2018 Death Wish, and you know both movies at some point are gonna end up on the Criterion Channel under a series called Elevated Vengeance or some shit. Also, absolutely the wrong reaction to this very serious movie and a particularly upsetting scene, but I chuckled when Larry Fessenden shows up as a mariticidal maniac. Anyway, the ending is pretty dumb but this is a pretty solid effort otherwise.

[so-much-for-subtlety]

[Spoiler-free review] last night I finished watching Billions and in the final (7th) season they added Babak Tafti who is soooo fucking hot, but a still kinda unknown actor (he doesn’t even have a Wikipedia page?!). Just look at him👀🥺🥴

He also had a small role in Succession, although unusually for me I think he’s hotter without the beard (but still very very hot)

Anyway Billions was such a weird series. The plot got so formulaic and the characters behaviors sort of ended up parodying themselves but (I think) that was probably intentional because it kind of added a slapstick comedy to what would have otherwise been just a typical drama.

They also have the striking physical transformation of Paul Giamatti who lost a LOT of weight mid season when filming paused during pandemic/strikes (one of the most unbelievable scenes was a bunch of NYPD wearing masks lol) and they also had an interesting non binary and neurodivergent character join in season 2 and became a core/main character from S3 to end of series.

I won’t give specific spoilers, but the ending I think was pretty satisfying from a fan perspective.

Also shout out to Condola Rashad who played this badass bitch attorney and (IMO) had a great character arc.

I fuckin hate the billionaire class and government corruption and the plot sort of played to this, but it also ultimately casts them as heros which is gross but eh, it was still an entertaining watch.

A solid 7/10 bananas 🍌

[adobe-outdesign]

Thoughts on the Aisha? It’s been my favorite neopet ever since I got a mcdonalds plushie of it when I was like 8 before I even knew what neopets was

Aisha are great because they're almost somewhat normal cat-like creatures—except they have two pairs of ears, one normal set and one set sticking up like antennae. These ears are the most important part of their design, as they're both visually distinct and very memorable.

Aishas also vaguely implied to have some degree of extra-terrestrial origins due to the existence of alien Aishas, which is a nice bit of worldbuilding and helps explain the weird ears even more (not that they're that unusual by Neopet standards, but still, it's neat).

In addition to the four ears, the other main notable thing about Aishas is their near-constant closed eyes (though some Aisha characters do have theirs open), which are punctuated by a ring around the outside. The ring is nice, as it helps break up their otherwise solid body colors a bit.

I'd also argue that Aishas benefited greatly from customization. First, their old artwork was getting very dated and needed a refresh anyways, and secondly, the only real change is that they're standing now, which doesn't really affect anything.

But the other big benefit the Aisha received is that their collars became a wearable item that can now be removed. I'm not going to lie, I never liked the collars. First, they're weird because in-universe, Neopets are anthropomorphic, and indeed, no Aisha characters sport the collars. Secondly, as a species, where do those collars come from, and why do Aishas wear them? And thirdly, they tend to add unnecessary color to their designs (like how the blue and green Aishas shown above sport red and yellow collars—though this varies depending on paint job). The "A" tag also feels clunky. They're not the worst, but having the choice to remove the collars or keep them is the best of both worlds.

The only big benefit to the collars is that they do sometimes do some really fun things with them depending on the color, as I've spotlighted below.

Favorite colours:

Alien: No Aisha review would be complete with talking about alien Aishas, which are absolutely iconic in their own right. Species-specific colors are always enjoyable, and the fact that the alien Aishas have SIX ears is fantastic. I also like the spacesuit/helmet combo, and the red triangle at least accents the red color a bit if you choose to keep it on. I just wish they had done something fun and futuristic with the collar, instead of sticking to the standard version.

Darigan: The converted version of this pet isn't terrible, but the unconverted version is fantastic. The thin body looks great, almost snake-like, and the pointed tail matches the tall ears, which are given a delightful devil-horn look. The spots help break up the body a bit, as does the addition of an underbelly, and the collar changes shape to a D for darigan, which is fun.

Mutant: Mutant Aishas, my beloved! What a great design. Replacing the second pair of ears with mouths and then accenting the pink lips with floppy, tongue-like spikes on the back is just great, with the pink working great against the blue. Bonus shoutout for the singular eye and the mutated "A" on the collar. My only nitpick is that the collar tag should've been the lighter teal of the stripes on the ears, and the band should've been pink.

BONUS: I'm cheating by including this, but I have to give a shout-out to the baby Aisha for being downright adorable with its little binky collar and soft blue color. I'm not usually big on baby pets, but this one's actually pretty great.

[bugbyte]

Today was good! I’m a little overwhelmed!

3:30 am posting because I’m feeling slightly wound thanks to today being a whole day, but it wasn’t a bad day?

Short version: bunch of appointments, thankfully all online, but after last week being stress central this was tolerable. I got my MMJ eval and it was quick and easy and if anything I over prepared because I’m so used to not being believed and having to back myself up with data. (Which I have to gather and keep for myself because medicine is apparently just a free for all where no one communicates with each other through the online app they have specifically so they can all access data about me from each other! Neat!)

Anyway that was a major relief and I was ready to cry because they said that this should work really well with the conditions and symptoms I have. I’ll probably write something up on the process later (because I would’ve liked a plain English walkthrough of what to expect but that’s ok) but I got my card from the state, which is all digital now, so welcome to the future, I guess.

We headed out to a pretty well reviewed and priced medical dispensary in the area and had a long info session on what would work best for me and landed on some low dose (for now) capsules and gummies. Then we got fried chicken because I’d had enough for one day and went home to see if it would work.

I took a capsule, ate my chicken, and waited. They did advise taking it with a fatty food (could’ve been peanut butter or avocado or anything really; we just got chicken for its uh, health…improving….properties….yeah that sounds right) It took like a solid hour and change to notice anything, and the effects were pretty minor.

I kept trying to explain what was happening to Delade but it was a very subtle thing and hard to get across. Basically the calmest I’ve felt in ages (bonus) and like a slight tiredness, like when you’re tired at the end of the day but not exhausted or like drugged tired if you take something to get to sleep and it hits hard. Just a nice soft calm feeling.

I got brave and tried adding in an extra half a gummy (watermelon flavor!) and that hit much more quickly and mostly just added to the soft feeling. Trying to put it in better words, it was like the different between laying directly on the hard floor, or laying on a puffy blanket on the floor. You can still feel the floor, but it’s much more comfortable than otherwise. I didn’t really feel particularly loopy other than finding a few things funnier than they probably actually were. I think I would compare it in drowsiness more to like…if you’ve been given an opioid after surgery or dental work or something, it’s kind of more like that than feeling just knocked right out. I always felt like these kinds of things gave me a sort of “cozy,” safe feeling while still being conscious enough to do some light things, and this was similar. Everybody’s different though so I might be a weirdo.

So yeah, it does work! I wasn’t expecting like a 100% change in pain levels, and this will definitely take some fine tuning to get right, but there was a difference for sure. I had the makings of a nasty headache after being stressed out all afternoon, which didn’t seem affected much by anything I took so that’s interesting. If I hadn’t had the headache I probably would have attempted some comic work but staring directly into a screen felt like a bad idea. In any case the sharp edges of the pain in the rest of my body got filed way down and I’m pretty amazed overall.

I know this can work now! So I can try again tomorrow! Hopefully with less stress headache so I can get a better gauge on how it actually feels! And hopefully try to draw.

So now I just have to figure out how not to feel weird about this talking to various doctors. Some recommended it, some I can imagine being less positive, but I think the anxiety about being judged is mostly in my head.

Anyway! It was a good experience overall, both the process for getting the card and actually trying the drug itself. If it’s something you’ve been looking into and have questions I can try and answer based on my (admittedly brief) experience so far. I only know how things work in NY, but being pretty anxious I get how it can feel more enormous to figure out when you don’t know the whole scope of a thing or what it’s like to actually do.

This entire thing makes me cackle btw because in fifth grade I won some DARE essay contest in school and I think got some kind of gift card I spent on art supplies, and a hat with the DARE lion mascot thing on it, which I think I still have and should probably start wearing for maximum dumbassery.

[babyspacebatclone]

Consumer Review for Flare Calmer® Pro ear inserts.

OMG these actually do what they promise!!!

🤩😍🤩

The ear inserts are hollow, meaning you still hear all the noise around you, which I admit is a tiny problem at the moment because my hearing sensitivity is currently high (being the end of the week, most of this was typed up at work during nap time) and so I am hearing the volume amplified.

But the stated purpose? Even out the highest pitch frequencies, which contribute most towards me going into an Autistic Meltdown?

After wearing them for a few weeks, I can finally definitively say yes, the experience supports the science.

At first, I wasn’t sure. The kind of pitches I respond worst to aren’t exactly common, or at the very least I’m not always going to encounter them.

Well, that’s what I was telling myself.

I have three different factors to noise that contribute to triggering my sensitivity/anxiety:

Noise Volume

Sound Frequency - higher is more painful

Oscillation in Frequencies - think how violins are played.

If all three max out, the result is a 12 out of 10 in my brain for agony and stress accumulation.

I should also mention I, naturally, work at a daycare center.

With crying babies and tantruming preschoolers.

Smart, huh? 🤪

Anyway…

I can tell when I’m specifically hit by a noise not just by the pain, but my response: first I close my eyes, a repressed wince; then the unrepressed winces; then slamming my hands over my ears, at which point I’m going to Meltdown it’s just a question of how quickly I can leave to make it a small one.

Yesterday, one specific child just had her own metldown after waking up from nap.

“Meltdown” in that she was in a spiral of “I’m mad so I’m crying, I’m crying because I’m mad,” it was 80% a tantrum where she was resisting all attempts at us calming her down explicitly because we weren’t going to “listen” to her (that is, let her play with toys she’d already refused while we were trying to get ready for snack, the same routine we do every day).

Anyway, it was 20 minutes of her crying and pouting at us.

And I know this girl, and how bad her tantrums hurt my ears.

It was mostly 8 out of 10, peaking at 9 out of 10, and that was all volume.

No wincing from me. None of that warble along the high frequencies that kills me.

And the day before this, I was definitely getting those while eating out between the “communicate with the waiter” and “put in my Flare Earshades and zone out.”

I’m not going to say they will work for everyone, and I think that’s why they have a pretty average review rating:

For some people, they do nothing, because the frequencies affected by the inserts aren’t ones that bother them.

And for other people - fortunately myself included! - they only protect from one specific thing.

But that very specific thing is a huge Meltdown and anxiety trigger!!!

(Comfort wise: I always feel the Pros in my ears, which have a solid aluminum core inside very well shaped silicon. But it’s literally just “feel” - there’s no pressure like from most noise-managing plugs. My set fit me perfectly, but there are limited sizes so that’s going to be far from universal. I can wear them all the time, but I also have some mild relief touch-wise to take them out.)

Oh, last point.

I’ve been using the Flare Earshade Pros less, but so far they’ve been very good. Definitely less ear pressure than my otherwise favorite foam earplugs, which has become a big problem for me. Decent noise blocking, maybe a bit less than my foam earplugs but I jam those in deep (which is probably why they hurt so much, lol). The comfort to noise reduction ratio is definitely in the Earshades favor.

And they’re so small, because they’re pre-shaped memory foam. I carry earplugs at all times in an Altoids Mini tin with some migraine meds, and instead of playing Tetris with everything I can just drop them in and be happy.

Definitely a recommendation, if you’re cruising the Flare Audio site already!!!

[lovelykhaleesiii]

What are your opinion of FNAF movie?

SORRY I waited to watch the film to then answer this ask. BUT WHY DID THE CENTRE’S FIRE ALARM GO OFF THAT THEY STOPPED THE FILM FOR A SOLID 15 mins and as they resumed the film, I lost 5 mins of dialogue because they forgot to put the sound back on… ANYWAYS 9/10 ⭐️

this will be a spoiler free review!!!!

as someone who has no background knowledge of this franchise (other than seeing thirst edits of Josh Hutcherson) this movie was actually really decent. I enjoyed the theatrics of it, the dialogue, the pace & the entire story line.

with that being said, my opinion will vary from someone who has played the game and is well acquainted to the story/characters.

although it was really easy to follow the plot line & as an introduction to this universe it was informative. the gore and horror was standard, not too gory or chilling.

the animatronics themselves and any CGI involved was outstanding. foxy was probably my fave, gave me the most chills.

otherwise, I wish they had delved deeper into mike’s backstory with his brother. the film was pretty short in comparison to most, but nonetheless, I thoroughly enjoyed myself.