#anyway rule breaking mutual if you made it this far you might as well tell me something to try

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Everybody Talks Too Much (Cassandra Dimitrescu/Mute!Reader)

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: T for language, brief violence Summary: Whenever Cassandra gets angry, no one wants to deal with her. Well, no one but you, that is. Thankfully, the middle child appreciates your company... not that she'd ever admit it. Notes: Another self-indulgent fic with a selectively mute reader. This one's a lil different. Sections in italic are mostly indications that the reader is miming actions in order to communicate, though there are a few internal thoughts that are marked as such. Unlike the past two I've done, this takes place pre-relationship, so there's some mutual pining of sorts. I think that's the word.

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Among the many servants of Castle Dimitrescu, there were a number of secret rules to be followed. Guidelines that were never written down, only spoken in hushed whispers, for specific (and dangerous) circumstances. Most could be divided into one of two categories: 1, how to reduce the chances of a Lady of the house killing someone. 2, how to make sure that if they kill someone, it will not be you. Of these rules, there was one that you knew best of all, despite never having been told it. Why? Because you have observed it time and time again. After all, the rule revolved around you. To put it plainly… If Cassandra Dimitrescu was in an awful mood, but had yet to draw blood, send in the mute.

Even now, as you rushed down a corridor, you did not know why this rule was in place. You simply knew that you had been summoned countless times by frantic maidens, to go serve their volatile mistress. Admittedly you did understand their eagerness to thrust the task upon someone else. Cassandra was often considered the deadliest of the Dimitrescu daughters, for she was the quickest to anger, the one with the deepest bloodlust, and took the longest to calm down. Personally, you disagreed, believing that it wasn’t terribly hard to know what she did and did not like. All it took was some observation. It was Daniela who scared you, seeing as she was unpredictable. She didn’t even need to be in a bad mood to want to kill you.

Of course, that didn’t necessarily mean that you saw no danger in working with Cassandra. In fact, you saw a fair bit, such as now: Right as you round the corner, a shiny object hurls past your head, embedding itself into the wall. Had you been walking ever so slightly faster… Well, you preferred not to dwell on such things, especially not when the one who threw the thing was still nearby. Based on the howling laughter and swarm of insects that moves around you, the intended target was Lady Daniela. Across the room is the markswoman herself; Cassandra stood tall, huffing in anger, staring at the spot her sister had just vacated from.

“Damn it!” She yelled, stomping her foot as if the resulting shockwave might do what her weapon had not. Oddly amused, you’re quick to remove the sickle from the wall, careful as to not damage it. It’s a tad dirty, but nothing you can’t fix with your handy pocket cloth. Cleaning as you walk, you slowly move towards your employer, not even bothering to spare her a glance. After all, you had your own rules for dealing with her.

(1: Avoid eye contact for at least one minute after an outburst.)

By the time you make it to Cassandra, the minute has come and gone, allowing you to ever-so politely look her in the eyes when you return her blade. She scoffs, then practically rips the sickle from your hands. This was your job, however, so you made no complaints. Not that you could, at least not verbally. Instead, you gave a short bow of acknowledgement. Afterwards you stood still, awaiting either instructions or a dismissal. Neither came.

“I can’t believe that little shit tried to take my favorite dagger and thought she could get away with it! Agh, the nerve of her! Can you believe this?” Cassandra snapped, turning to you as if you might agree with her. Nod, simple yet effective. “At least you know how to handle a blade. Damn Daniela is lucky she didn’t get any scratches on mine.” Then she pulls the knife in question from its place on her belt, letting it gleam in the light. A soft exhale, head tipping to the side, wow is it pretty. So is the one holding it. Your mind wanders but your gaze does not. Always polite, always ready to serve.

(2: Do not get distracted; she is no patient lover, rather a demanding boss.)

“Cassandra! What was all that noise a minute ago?” Someone called, interrupting your ‘conversation’. The speaker soon appears, being none other than Lady Bela, the most reasonable of the castle residents. Though that meant little, considering the nature of her family. As if to prove your point, Cassandra merely rolls her eyes in reply, refusing to divulge the truth. And so Bela turned her gaze to you, perking a brow. “Feeling up to talking today?” She asked, already knowing the answer. Of course, your hands are already moving, not even waiting for her to finish speaking. This is a game you know intimately.

A hand goes to your belt, moving to pull a nonexistent blade from its sheath. Raising it, moving it forward then back several times, launching it towards the wall- towards the hole left behind. Then shifting, waving your hand in front of your face while exhaling a sharp breath. Flinching. An exaggerated gulp, pretending to check if your nose is still attached, sighing in relief. Lastly, an inclination of your head towards the culprit. Cassandra.

“I was aiming for Daniela. Not that it matters, nobody got hurt,” she stated, confident. Both hands clasped together, then tapping the palms together, mimicking a heartbeat at a reasonable pace. Suddenly a stomp. The beating stops, and you hold your hands next to your ear, as if listening for signs of life. Pause. Three seconds. Worried expression, eyes wide. Finally, fast as a gunshot, the heart beats again, wildly. At this, Bela shoots her sister a look of doubt, as well as judgement. Hoping to change the subject, Cassandra looks to you. “What are you doing here anyway?”

Rubbing your chin, thinking. Squinting for effect. Ah, got it! Both hands go to your sides, lifting the imaginary hem of a dress you aren’t wearing. Waltzing forward, yet in place, with the poise expected of a professional maid. Then the focus shifts to your face. Fear. A silent scream, a hand at your forehead, feeling like you… might… faint. Falling backwards, making a step at the very last second to prevent a real collapse. End scene.

“Someone was scared?” Bela asked, sounding uncharacteristically unsure of herself. When you nod, she does as well, considering the implications. “Why would they send you?”

“I hardly care why, I just want to know who so I can kick their ass,” Cassandra interjects, taking a step closer to you. All you do in response is shrug. Unsurprisingly this is not enough to please her, and before you know it she’s wrapped a hand around your throat. “Give. Me. A. Name. Now.” A perked brow. Thoughts practically telegraphed. ‘What do you expect?’ Opening your mouth, slightly, then wide, back to almost closed. No sound comes out. Obviously. It’s not like you wanted to break your own rule, but in this case you had no choice.

(3: Give her whatever she wants, consequences be damned.)

Luckily for you, Bela acts as a foil to Cassandra, there to smooth the seas. Moving behind you, she reaches into your back pocket and retrieves the notepad you keep there. Then she’s handing it to you while making eye contact with her sister. Cassandra promptly releases you, though she’s clearly not pleased, going so far as to push you away in one last act of anger. Internally you roll your eyes. On the outside, however, you quickly write down everything you know… which isn’t much.

“I don’t remember who it was. A lot of people have asked. This happens a lot.” Then you hand the paper to Bela, who soon looks back up at you in confusion. Too antsy to wait for her own turn, Cassandra yoinks the notepad from her sister’s hands, reading it over several times before reacting.

“What the fuck? Why would they send you to me because somebody pissed their pants in fear? I’m going to kill someone. Ugh, I don’t- this doesn’t make any goddamn sense,” Cassandra ranted, pacing back and forth, looking like she wanted to destroy something immediately. To your surprise, Bela doesn’t look the slightest bit concerned. If anything, she looks amused, and smiles when the two of you make eye contact. Something tells you that she knows something that you don’t. Before you can react, she quietly retrieves your notepad and returns it to you. Then she pauses, thinking, eying you with curiosity.

“Why don’t you go for now? See if anyone thanks you for stepping in, hmm?” She suggested, tone implying that this was absolutely about something else entirely. Still, you don’t care to disobey, and so you bid the two of them farewell with a deep bow. As you leave, you can almost make out part of what they say next. But you’re certain that you must have heard incorrectly. “Showing your favoritism a little too much, sister? If even the servants can see it-” the rest of the sentence is cut off by angry muttering from Cassandra. After that you’re too far away to hear anymore. What a strange day...

--------------------------

“Hey, you know where Lady Cassandra’s room is, right?” Ygritte asked, casually, definitely not having just been told by someone else that you were the solution to her problem. Pretending that you were unaware of this, you give her a smile and a nod. Later, behind her back, you will mentally add her to your list of people to watch out for. Maybe even decide to refuse to share your biscuits with her. In the meantime, you pretend that you don’t mind whatever task she’s about to dump on you. “Can you bring these books to her? I really have to get back to the kitchen soon, and that’s in the opposite direction…”

Technically true. Something told you that the real problem was that Cassandra had been extra loud the past few days. Regardless, you accept the books from her, leaving before she even finishes thanking you. Why do people do this? I don’t get it, you think. It’s like they think I’m immune to her rage. If that were true, I’d gladly throw myself between her and others. But no, that’s not the case. Hmmph, if only they saw my scars. Shaking your head to clear your thoughts, you keep walking, subconsciously rubbing the spot on your arm where Cassandra had cut you. Well, the worst spot. Being pain tolerant had made her take interest in you, during your first few weeks, but it’s what allowed you to learn her rules. Your rules, really.

Knock. Knock. A pause… three more, much softer. The door swings open, revealing your Lady, whose eyes widen at the sight of you. Tipping your hat (which you are not wearing), you greet her, forcing another smile. Then you present the books, free hand gesturing with a spiral motion towards them. She doesn’t respond. No, wait, she glances at the door hinges, considering closing the door in your face. Now both of you are staring at each other, daring the other to move.

“You’re not supposed to be here,” she finally said. There’s a gruffness to her voice that you hadn’t expected. It’s unlike her usual tone, less angry, more tired. Were those bags under her eyes?... No, just smudged makeup. “Don’t just stand there- tell me why you’re here.” Again, you gesture to the books, extending your hands further towards her. This time she takes a half-step backwards to avoid you. Peculiar. “Someone else was supposed to bring them, dipshit. Fucking hell, why can’t anyone around here do their damn jobs?” At last, she takes the books from you, carrying them deeper into your room. Though she does not close the door, you assume that your job is done. Or maybe you simply do not wish to deal with a Cassandra who’s frustrated by your specific presence. Either way, it breaks one of your rules, though you do not remember until it is too late.

(4: Do not leave until dismissed by a member of the family.)

“Where the hell are you going?” The sound of buzzing flies, a blur of motion around you, then the form of Cassandra solidifying in front of you. One of her hands is raised, pressing against the center of your chest. She pushes you, hard, making you stumble backwards into her room. Next thing you know you’ve crashed onto her floor. A tad stunned, you bring a hand up to hold your head, blinking rapidly for a few seconds. There’s the sound of a door closing, and then someone’s trying to help you stand. “I didn’t say you could leave yet. Now c’mon, I’ve got stuff for you to do.” Then she’s guiding you to her bed, making you sit down on the end. Panicked thoughts race through your mind one after another. What exactly was she intending? Thankfully you don’t have to wait long to find out. “Read through these, and-” a pause, like she hadn’t known what she was going to say until she was already speaking- “take notes. Make a summary of the bookmarked sections, or whatever.” Handing you a couple books (neither of which being ones you had just brought to her), she sits on the other side of the bed, refusing to look at you. She does, however, say one last thing, voice barely above a whisper. “Just stay for a while, okay?”

Inside your head, you make a mental note to amend your list of rules.

(4.b: Do not leave until dismissed by a member of the family. If Cassandra asks you to stay, you stay, no matter what. It’s worth it.)

[sunsetcurvecuddles]

(Psssssst)

Bobbyalex 26, 28, 45

hi beloved. guess what time it is. @weneedglitter this is for you too <3 PROMPTS: 26: kissing the top of their head, 28: feeling for each other in the dark, 45: feeling their temperature

brief au context for anyone who isn't morgan or lilly: sunset curve alive au, bobbyalex are exes, the boys all run away from their terrible families and get an apartment together.

maybe we can grow from this | ao3 link in reblogs bobbyalex, sunset curve ot4 | g | 1k | sickfic, hurt/comfort, pining

--

It’s still dark when something stirs Alex awake. His first thought is that it must be Bobby’s phone going off with his work alarm, since in winter it sounds long before the break of dawn. But when he blinks and his eyes struggle to find purchase in the dark of the room, he realises it’s still mostly quiet.

They’re sleeping in their usual order, with Luke closest to the door, then Alex, then Reggie, then Bobby on the other far side of their bed. He can hear Luke snoring softly behind him, and sometimes Reggie talks in his sleep, and Bobby’s at what sounds like the end of a coughing fit, but he’s always coughing. It must still be very late at night, or very early in the morning.

Alex is about to sink back into sleep when Bobby starts up again. It’s wet and deep, like it’s tearing his chest apart on its way up to his throat, and it’s continuous. Bobby’s always coughing, but not usually like this.

“Bobby?” Alex whispers. His voice sounds too loud in the dark but Luke and Reggie don’t stir. Realistically, Alex guesses if they slept through everything that happened in their houses, and now through Bobby’s hacking, his talking won’t disturb them.

Bobby doesn’t answer. Now that his eyes are adjusting to the dark, Alex can see vague outlines, like Reggie curled up in the fetal position with his face inches from Alex’s own, and Bobby sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to the rest of them. The shape of him is hunched, his shoulders rounded forward, and Alex can see him running his hands through his own hair. He’s still coughing, and it’s starting to sound strained and harsh.

It feels like it’s been a constant, Bobby being sick, ever since they met together with packed bags and some stolen cash from Bobby’s dad and bolted to a new city far from their shitty families. Their tiny new apartment, with its impractical kitchenette and the constantly malfunctioning hot water and the combined bed frames they pushed together to save space, is wonderful in so many ways. Reggie laughs as loud as he wants and is always well-fed, Luke plays guitar and lies around on the couch without fear of retribution, and Alex can lock the door on the bathroom from the inside and doesn’t feel like he has to have eyes in the back of his head. It’s just that Bobby’s always sick.

Alex is fumbling, dopey and unsure of the distance, when he reaches across Reggie to press a hand to Bobby’s back. It’s an action with two purposes. Rubbing in gentle circles with hopes of providing at least some comfort, he also notes that the back of Bobby’s favourite worn-out sweater is damp with sweat, and he’s trembling, but he’s not burning up. Alex doesn’t need to get out of bed and find the thermometer to know Bobby doesn’t have a fever this time.

Finally, Bobby drags in a ragged breath that comes out a wheezing exhale. He slumps further forward, so Alex continues the circles for another few moments, to see if it comes back. In the daylight, he wouldn’t touch Bobby like this (he would try not to touch Bobby at all where it’s not strictly necessary. They never brush their teeth at the same time, so they can avoid being shoulder-to-shoulder at the little basin, so neither of them has to catch the other’s eyes in the mirror). However, there seems to be a silent, mutual understanding that when Bobby’s sick in the middle of the night, the rules are different.

“You done?” he asks, still keeping his voice low. “Need the inhaler? Meds?”

“Think ‘m good. Just got cold,” Bobby rasps, voice thick with congestion and sounding so exhausted Alex’s chest hurts in sympathy. “Wanna go back to sleep.”

“Yeah, okay,” murmurs Alex. Wants so badly to say please come get warm, but doesn’t dare. Instead, he says, “Lie between me and Reggie? He’s been kicking me all night anyway.”

Bobby hesitates, still shivering under Alex’s hand, but only for a moment. “Don’t wanna wake him up,” he grunts, and Alex breathes a sigh of relief, because that’s as close as he’ll get to a yes.

“There’s enough room,” Alex assures him, even though that’s an inaccurate statement about anything relating to their apartment. And because it’s always been easier when he’s made it about himself instead of trying to give Bobby what he needs, Alex tugs at the back of Bobby’s sweater and adds, “C’mon, I’m tired.”

Even on his shaky limbs, Bobby is so careful as he eases himself over Reggie and into the spot between him and Alex. It’s a tight squeeze. Alex tries to push back against Luke, but Bobby follows him. His arms find their way around Alex’s waist, fingers brushing Alex’s waist and back where his shirt has ridden up. The skin to skin makes Alex shiver, even though he’s not the one who’s cold. Bobby nudges his head up under Alex’s chin and his whole body relaxes, one long shudder from his head to his toes as he settles. In a tiny lapse of self control, from muscle memory and instinct and years of things being different to how they are now, Alex presses a kiss to the top of Bobby’s head.

As soon as he becomes aware of what he’s doing, he stops, moving his head up to bury his face in Bobby’s hair instead. Instead of pulling back or freezing up or muttering, Alex, don’t -- Bobby just sighs, coughs slightly as he does, and Alex realises he’s already mostly asleep.

He’s just chasing the warmth, Alex tells himself, as Bobby snuggles close and Alex runs a hand down his back and up again. He ignores any sensations that might be arising in his chest. Any regret poking around in his ribs, any loneliness in his lungs, any yearning tangling up the base of his throat. It has to be enough that Bobby’s here at all. That they’re all here, and they’re safe, and Reggie doesn’t have as many nightmares and Luke doesn’t stay up until the early hours of the morning bouncing off the walls and getting into trouble, and no one locks Alex in his room away from the people he cares about. This has to be enough. Alex isn’t allowed to want anything else.

Bobby’s not well and he wants to be warm. So Alex keeps him warm.

[tteokggukk]

all an act → ksj

✳ pairing: acting major! seokjin x acting major reader, basically they’re both acting majors

✳ genre: enemies to lovers, fluff, college au

✳ warnings: swearing, copulation is implied (not written), just PG-13

✳ words: 10.6k

✳ a/n: I’M SO EXCITED FOR THIS ONE i’ve had this idea on my mind longer than my published stuff so far. i also didn’t think this would even reach 10k+ words, i initially thought it’d only be ~5k but my hand kept slipping and slipping and 10k happened. anyways, enjoy reading! and again, if you’d like to send some comments (esp on things i can do to improve), don’t hesitate to comment or send an ask!

"How many years is it gonna take for you to finish writing a sentence?" You sighed and began tapping on your foot. You were sitting in one of tables outside to finish a short paper about a film your professor tasked you to watch with a partner. Normally you were fine working with anyone, and even if it was individual work you'd have no problem getting it done in no time. However, today was different. You almost wanted to tear your hair out and scream for as long as you could until this was all over.

You didn't expect Kim Seokjin to be your partner this time.

"When you stop acting like a priss, that's when," Seokjin rolled his eyes as he typed out the remaining sentences of your "collaborative" effort. You wouldn't even call it collaborative unless it meant having to argue about several different points of a story just to piece a whole paper together. You rolled your eyes and clicked your tongue, muttering a "Looks who's talking," underneath your breath.

For the whole year you survived not being partners with him and you thought you'd be able to get away with it, until your professor stopped allowing people to choose partners and started assigning them instead. You desperately hoped this was the last time you'd ever be partnered with someone you loathed.

You were both acting majors and were well known as two of the most top performing students in your batch, but you never got along well. When you respectfully asked your professor why he paired you with him in hopes of trying to get out of it, he started talking to you about both of your “potentials” and “how much better it'd be for the two of you to work together”.

"Here. I'm done," he pushes your laptop away from him and towards you, "Can I leave?"

"We still have to print and pass this," you told him through gritted teeth.

"And you need me for that? Wow, I'm almost flattered," He snickers before standing up and grabbing his bag.

"I'm so glad you aren't."

Slamming your laptop shut, you trudged ahead to the library to have the paper printed, moving slightly faster to avoid having to talk to (or argue with) Seokjin. You didn't have the energy to keep bickering, you were just glad this paper was over and you'd never have to talk to each other again.

You stood next to Seokjin, making sure there was distance between you two as your professor, Mr. Brown, began silently reading your work.

So far so good, he was nodding and smiling as he mouthed the words on the paper, making only a few marks on every other page. 

All you needed to do was wait for him to announce your grade and you could both go your separate ways. Why couldn't time move any faster? You began counting the seconds to save yourself from boredom, but also to keep your eyes away from your partner.

"Wow, this is…" Mr. Brown spoke, breaking the silence.

"Yes?" You and Seokjin both asked in unison before glaring at each other for a millisecond.

"Unexpected," Mr. Brown says as he places your paper in front of you.

"Sir?" Your right eye narrows as you call in confusion. What does he mean?

"Unexpected. I thought for sure bringing you two together would produce a well-thought paper, but… this is terrible."

Terrible.

You felt your heart sink. No one has ever called your paper terrible. In fact, most of your papers almost always had good comments and praises and perfect marks, how could this have happened? You even made sure to check everything thrice before finalizing everything.

"What?" Seokjin exclaimed, "What do you mean our paper's terrible?"

"It lacks unity. Your opposing ideas are all over the place, I can tell you tried to link them, but you failed at it," Mr. Brown sighs in disappointment before taking his glasses off to breathe deeply, "You're aware of how many points this paper is, yes?"

"Yes," you and Seokjin spoke nervously.

"And you know only one submission is allowed, yes?"

"Yes," you both answered.

"You know where I'm getting at, right?"

You swallow nervously before speaking up, "Sir, can't we revise it and pass it again? We'll just tweak some of the—"

"I'm afraid you can't. You know the rules very well, Ms. Y/L/N," Mr. Brown shook his head. You sighed, feeling defeated.

"You both clearly have problems working together. Teamwork is part of the criteria, you know," Mr. Brown stood up to sit on the edge of his desk, "You're both our top performing students. I can understand how much your grades mean to you, but did you not consider how your differences could affect your output?"

"Is there any way we can get some extra credit to make up for this paper?" Seokjin asks. You felt a little relieved at his question as you were already feeling too nervous to ask any more.

Mr. Brown looked around in thought, "Well, there is a way I suppose. Some of the upperclassmen under my class are creating a short film and they need extra actors for their project. If you'd like to help them out, I'll give your paper full marks and add some extra points to your other outputs. It might be too taxing for you though."

"No! It's alright, could you give us their names so we can talk to them?" You asked. Mr. Brown nodded and began writing something down on a piece of paper before handing it over to you.

"I wish you two the best of luck. And please try to get along." Mr. Brown says before you and Seokjin excuse yourselves out of the room.

"What do you know? Even our papers show we don’t work together well," Seokjin mutters as you two rushed to find those seniors you needed to work with, "I could've passed if I just had the right partner."

"You're blaming me?" You couldn't believe it, the audacity, "I would've gotten perfect marks even if I wrote that paper with my eyes closed."

Seokjin laughs, "Yeah, okay. You might not have even gotten any marks if you weren't with me."

"You know, my expectations for you were low, but holy fuck," You snickered, "This is the first time I've ever gotten a comment like that on an output. I don't think you being my partner this time around was a coincidence.”

"Oh yeah? If you had just agreed to add my opinion on—"

Just as Seokjin began leaning in to you to defend his ideas, you turned around to face him, abruptly stopping his speech, "Could you just shut up and walk while we look for the guy on this paper?" Your blood was boiling at the sound of his voice, all you wanted to do was get this over with.

The two of you continued searching rooms with Seokjin following behind until you reached the room with the door number your professor had written down. You stared at the piece of paper and looked at the door, hesitating to knock.

"Give me that," Seokjin took the paper from your hand and quickly knocked before letting himself in as you followed.

"Hello, is Oliver Beck here?" Seokjin asked and everyone around stared, making you feel a bit uncomfortable. A guy with long hair wearing a plaid shirt came forward, "That's me, what is it?"

"Hi, we're students from Mr. Brown's class and we were wondering if we could participate as extras in your short film? He says we need the extra credit," Seokjin explained.

Oliver looks confused. "Extras? We've already got that covered," he says, "We need main actors."

"Main actors?" You asked.

"Yeah, no one has agreed to do it yet, but we've already asked some to—"

"We'll do it," Seokjin cuts him off, causing Oliver to raise his brows in surprise.

"You will?"

"Yeah, we really need the credit."

"Are you sure? You haven't seen the script yet," Oliver asks hesitantly.

"Positive. We'll do our best," You spoke.

"Er— alright then, follow me," Oliver motioned for the two of you to walk along. You and Seokjin couldn't help but send each other mutual confused expressions.

Neither of you knew what you were getting into. How bad could the film be that no one has agreed to do it?

Oliver pulls out two copies of what seemed to be scripts from his bag and hands them to the two of you, "Here. It's pretty short, so it shouldn't take long to memorize."

The script wasn't as thick as you thought it would be, so you decide to flip through pages to see what some of the scenes were like. Seokjin just stares at the title on the front page.

"I don't mean to pressure you but we start filming next month, so I'd start practicing if I were you," Oliver announces, "Anyways, I'd better get back to my friends. Send me your numbers so I can contact you guys for details."

After exchanging names and numbers with Oliver and a few of his group mates for the project, you and Seokjin finally left the room.

"Why do you think no one agreed to film with them?" Seokjin asks. You didn't exactly think you were both on friendly-conversation-terms, but the same question did linger in your mind.

"I don't know. Why? Are you backing out?" You asked mockingly.

"If there's anyone between us who'd back out from this, I'm pretty damn sure it wouldn't be me," He scoffs.

"You know, if we had just done that paper properly we wouldn't be stuck here doing some film that I don't even know," You sighed angrily.

"God, get over it. You should be glad you're even part of this extra credit thing. Technically I was the one who asked about it," Seokjin grunts.

"I am so close to taking this script and stabbing you with it," You glared at him.

Before you two parted ways, you both agreed to meet tomorrow at an empty rehearsal room to practice some of the scenes. You didn't know how this was even going to work, you blamed the whole thing on the paper even though you knew it was both your faults. How would starring in a film make up for everything if your paper couldn't even save you both?

You hung around in your dorm for the rest of the day to read through the script. A few hours later, Courtney, your best friend and roommate, arrived.

"I got your texts," she said a little too loudly as she entered, "Seriously? You're filming with Kim Seokjin?"

You let out a groan as you fell back on your bed with the script covering your face, "Ugh, I know! Can you believe my luck?"

"You know if any other girl had the chance, they'd thank all the gods right about now," Courtney laughed as she lied down on your bed, "I'm sorry about your paper though."

She was right. Seokjin was incredibly liked by everyone. He was the kind of person that exuded this welcoming aura, like you could easily be friends with him. Even people from other classes knew him. He always had that bright smile when it came to others. It was just different with you.

"It's fine. I didn't think our hate for each other would be reflected on our paper," you sighed, "And now I have to meet him tomorrow just to practice, ugh."

"You're meeting tomorrow?" Courtney raises a brow. You nod disappointingly.

"Well," Courtney sighed in annoyance, "Make sure he even gets there. If he stands you up again, I won't hesitate to beat the shit out of—"

You laughed, "Please, Court. He'll have to come this time. He's the one who got us into this."

"Yeah he'd better. Listen, call me immediately if he doesn't, okay? Wouldn’t hurt to give him a piece of my mind."

Ranting about Seokjin left you feeling ravenous, and it didn’t take long before you two decided to leave the room to grab some food from the cafeteria and talk about your day. When you both got back, you headed for bed and began reading the script, mouthing some of the lines to familiarize yourself with everything. 

Not even a few pages later and you felt your mind wandering off as your eyes rolled back, feeling yourself drift away with the script falling off your bed as you fell into a deep sleep.

Seokjin was a few minutes late in the rehearsal room but you decided to let it slide since you two had to be on good terms to make this practice work. Based on what you've read so far; the story was about friends who've had feelings for each other for so long but couldn't do anything about it in fear of ruining their friendship. Generic, you thought.

"I'd say sorry for being late, but it's only you waiting," Seokjin says as he enters the room and drops his bag on the floor.

"I'd say no problem, I didn't wait long, but you're an imbecile that probably made me wait on purpose," You faked a smile before quickly turning back to a stern expression, "Did you read the script?"

"Just halfway," He says and pulls his copy of the script out from his bag, "Did you?"

"Same," you muttered, "So, let's start with the first scene?"

For the first thirty minutes you two had agreed to sit down and rehearse your lines. You were both good at reciting the dialogues, it almost seemed like you were professionals. You thought there wouldn't be any problems when it came to actually acting out the scenes until you both finally had to practice with delivery, you both sucked.

"What is so hard about not being stiff?" Seokjin exclaims.

"I am not stiff! You're just not moving that close to me!" You retorted, crossing your arms in defense.

"You know what? We've been going at this scene for an hour now and nothing looks right," Seokjin sighs.

"Of course nothing looks right, it's our first time practicing together. I've literally never done a scene with you before," You sat down on the floor and ran your fingers through your hair.

You'd think two top performing students would have a piece of cake acting out simple scenes with perfect chemistry, but you and Seokjin were far from it.

"We've never been partners before?" He asks, sitting down in front of you.

"No, never. And I honestly thought it'd stay that way," You grumbled.

"God, you talk as if this was my fault," Seokjin glares at you, "If we were the last people on Earth and had to do that paper again, I hope you know I'd rather choose a monkey than work with you."

"Why? Because great minds think alike?" You fought back.

"It's a well-known fact those animals have bigger brains than you do."

I swear to God, hold me back or I am gonna hurt him so bad.

"Why don't we just practice reading the lines and act them out tomorrow?" You suggested politely with a smile that was so painfully forced. 

And so that was what you did for the next two hours, only rehearsing the first half of the film. That was what you did for the next two days, but the problem was though you two did sound great in dialogue, your act wasn't close to it.

Jin had a secret.

He's been keeping it for months now, and only his best friend, Yoongi, knew about it.

He didn't actually know why you two hated each other so much. He had no idea why you hated him at all. He just started going along with it until it became a habitual thing, but as to why this all started he had absolutely no clue.

"She's nice to me," Yoongi spoke as he shoved another potato in his mouth.

"She's nice to everyone," Jin added.

"Everyone but you," Yoongi laughed.

"I think the reason why you two can't get your scenes right is because you act like you hate each other," Yoongi told Jin as they ate their lunch, "Why don't you just ask her why she hates you so much?"

"I can't, she thinks I have a reason. It wouldn't make sense if I asked her," Jin shrugged, "It's kinda fun though, bickering with her. I just don't understand why."

Yoongi raised a brow, "Fun? Hold on, you're not…"

"It's not whatever you're thinking," Jin rolled his eyes, earning him a smirk from Yoongi.

"Right," Yoongi spoke, "What are you gonna do about your practice? Hasn't it been like, two weeks?"

"Yeah, and we're nowhere near done," Jin sighs, "Speaking of which, I have to go meet her now."

"Sounds like a date," Yoongi teased.

"I will hit you with this script," Jin warns him before taking his bag and muttering goodbye.

He hurriedly walked to the rehearsal room and checked his watch, he was late again today. Jin was sure he'd earn another lecture from you and how he lacked punctuality and that they'd never get anything done if he never arrived on time. Today he brought ear plugs, and before walking in he made sure to put them on before entering the room.

There was no noise.

It took him a minute to find you lying down on the floor on the side of the room, using your bag as a pillow. You were sleeping soundly as you clutched your script in your hand with earphones plugged in.

Jin closed the door behind him and quietly sat down in front of you. He watched as you slept peacefully, hair strands falling on your face.

You're pretty, Jin thought. You always have been attractive to him, and kind to others-- but it was always a different case when it came your relationship with him, or lack thereof. Without thinking, he found himself reaching out for your face, tucking the strands of hair behind your ear.

You opened your eyes and saw Jin sitting in front of you, his hand close to your face. His eyes widen and he quickly moves back, his ears turning red.

"What are you doing?" You asked, pulling your earphones out of your ears.

What was he doing? You hated each other. Was he not thinking straight for a moment just because you looked so peaceful and harmless while you slept? Was he forgetting how much you hated his guts?

"There was a bug," he lied and quickly stood up, shyly turning away from you.

That was odd. I could've sworn…

"Okaaay," You spoke awkwardly and stood up, rubbing your eyes to get rid of any eye crusts that may have formed while you were sleeping, "Whatever, let's practice."

You had to admit though, your practices were getting better. There was less banter and more productive work and you couldn't help but feel like a huge weight off your chest has just been lifted. Oddly enough, there were less insults coming from both sides and subtler, masked compliments.

"You know for a monkey, you're doing pretty well," Seokjin teased, causing you to roll your eyes but smile anyway.

"You can just say I'm talented, don't be shy," you joked, making him chuckle a bit.

It was awkward though, being "nice" to each other. With Seokjin, you were more used to insults and arguments rather than trying hard at compliments. At the same time, it felt kind of nice to know that it was possible to have more to your "relationship" rather than constantly fighting.

By the time you two had finished practicing, it was already dark out. You both sat on the floor for a good ten minutes before standing up and deciding to leave.

"Hey, Monkey, it's dark outside," Seokjin spoke, breaking the silence between you two.

"Yeah, I know," you replied. You were already used to going home alone in the dark, so you figured him trying to scare you wouldn't make any difference.

"How far is your dorm?" He asks.

"It's a twenty-minute walk, I guess," You tried not to sound surprised at his question, "Why?"

"Come on," he says and opens the door, "I'll walk you home." Seokjin turned all the lights off now, which thankfully hid his ears that were now red.

Your eyebrows were raised in shock as you stood there wondering if you heard him right.

"What are you doing standing there? Hurry up!" He called.

You stared in disbelief as you walked towards him, silently analyzing what food he must’ve had before practice that messed with his brain and made him nice all of a sudden. He closes the door behind you two and you both start walking.

It was silent. And awkward. And you were confused. Why was he suddenly being so nice? It felt so… weird.

"Are you sick?" You asked.

"No?" He looks at you, confused, "Why?"

"You're being nice," You said, a little too quietly.

"If something happened to you people would blame me because I was with you last," he explained quickly, "Plus, there are many animal abusers on the loose—"

"Oh, shut up, forget it," you shoved him lightly, holding back a smile as Seokjin laughed.

And then there was silence again.

"How do you wanna go about the last scene?" Seokjin asks out of nowhere.

The last scene? Oh, that scene.

It was your turn to turn pink now as you avoided trying to sound like the question bothered you. You tried your best to sound nonchalant as you answered.

"I don't know, just go with the flow, I guess…" you told him.

"When do you wanna practice?" He asks, sounding casual.

"Whenever you're ready," You muttered. Am I even ready?

When you finally got to your dorm, you contemplated whether or not you would say bye to him. While silently debating with yourself on what you should do as you stepped on the stairs leading to your building door, Seokjin beat you to whatever decision you might've made.

"I'll see you Monday, Monkey," Seokjin said, stopping in front of the first step.

"Thanks for walking with me, see ya," you said in a voice that sounded more monotone than you wanted it to be. Neither of you said anything else so you went ahead and walked in. Seokjin watched and finally left when you were no longer in sight.

The way he was acting today bothered you. Not in a bad way, you just didn't understand why he was being that way. Had something changed?

Once you entered your dorm room, you tried to fix your face into a normal one as you pushed your thoughts aside. Courtney immediately rushed over to you to ask you questions.

"You don't usually come home after dark, what took you so long?" She asked.

"I practiced with Seokjin, remember?" You spoke, carefully avoiding eye contact as you placed your bag on your chair.

"For this long?" She asks suspiciously.

"Yeah, we finally got some scenes right," you turned to face her as you plopped yourself onto your bed.

"About time," she sat on her chair, "Hey, will you go out with me tomorrow?"

"Ooooh, are you asking me out on a date?" You teased as Courtney rolled her eyes with a smile. 

"No, at least not with me," she grins.

"Huh?" You asked, squinting one eye.

"Micara set me up on a blind date with someone on campus. Apparently they're bringing a friend so now it's a double blind date," she sighs.

"You agreed on a blind date? That's so sketchy," you commented, earning yourself a look from Courtney.

"Yeah, yeah, it's sketchy. I just did it for fun, Micara says he's really cute. I don't know about the friend, though."

"Cute is subjective."

"You have to come with me," Courtney pleads with puppy dog eyes.

"Courtney! No, ask someone else," you tried to shake your hand away from Courtney who was now holding onto your arm.

"It's gonna be so weird if I hang out with the two of them!"

"Well, that's what you get for saying yes to blind dates."

"Please! What if they actually are weirdos who want to take advantage of me?" She pouts. That did make you think twice. A smile begins to creep up on Courntey's lips, knowing you were about to say yes.

"You're lucky I love you," You sighed.

"Yes! Thank you so much, y/n," She pulls you in for a tight hug, "You won't regret coming with me."

The next time you saw Seokjin wasn't on Monday.

You saw him the next day. On the double date. In a movie theater. 

Your heart nearly stopped.

At first you thought Courtney's date came alone and you almost made an excuse to leave, until Seokjin came carrying two bags of popcorn with him, almost dropping them when he saw you standing there.

"Monkey? What are you doing here?" Seokjin asked in shock.

"Do you two know each other?" Josh, Courtney's date, asks while taking one bag of popcorn.

"They hate each other," Courtney whispers to her date.

"You’re the friend?" You asked out loud.

"Before you two come for each other's necks, why don't we fall in line for the movie?" Courtney anxiously smiles as she and Josh begin to walk away to line up, leaving you and Seokjin staring at each other. The whole situation reminded you of that Spiderman meme.

Seokjin sighs and walks closer to you, "Guess I'm gonna have to stay with you."

"No one's forcing you to," you told him.

"Do you want me to leave then?" He challenges.

"I never asked you to come!" Your voice slightly raises in defense.

"Great, then!"

"Fine!"

But neither of you moved from where you stood. You just stared at each other, arms folded while Seokjin clutched onto the bag of popcorn. Finally, you let out a deep breath.

"I can't leave my friend," You spoke.

"So can I," He says, "Let's just fall in line."

Courtney and Josh were so far ahead now you could barely see their faces from where you were. Seokjin stood behind you in the line. Neither of you said anything.

There was a group of guys standing in front of you talking loudly to themselves. Suddenly you notice their voices turn down and they began whispering among themselves. You could've sworn you caught them stealing glances at you. The guy in front of you turns around to face you. You raise a brow.

"Hi, I'm Max," he introduces, "I couldn't help but notice you."

Well, duh. I'm right behind you.

"Oh, hello Max," You forced a polite smile.

"These are my friends," he motions at the group of guys behind him and they all wave, "You should join us."

Does he not know the tickets have assigned seats? Embarrassing.

"No, I really shouldn't," you tried to sound as friendly as possible to avoid any trouble, but the guy was persistent and he was beginning to annoy you.

"It's alright, we don't bite. Are you alone?" He asks, slowly moving closer while you tried to move back. This guy was extremely creepy.

"Uh—"

"She said no. Fuck off," You heard Seokjin speak up from behind you, his voice much deeper and more intimidating causing chills to run down your spine. It was different from the way he spoke to you whenever you would banter.

"I was talking to her, who even are you?" Max says rudely and glares at Seokjin.

"I'm the guy she came with. What's your deal?" Seokjin moves forward and places his hand on your shoulder to subtly move you away from the guy.

"Oh, yeah? I never saw you talking to her," Max challenges.

"I think she already said no once. How many times does she have to decline before you understand that no means no?" Seokjin crosses his arms. He was much taller than the creepy guy, who was obviously starting to become intimidated by him.

"Dude, back the fuck off. We were here first," Max spits. They were so close, you almost thought a fight was about to happen.

"Do you realize how stupid you sound?" Seokjin frowns. That was enough. People were beginning to stare so you held onto Seokjin's arm, "Seokjin, it's fine. Just stop talking to him."

"No, this guy is extremely disrespectful and creepy!" Seokjin's voice was a little too loud now, "You don't get to force girls you don't even know to stick with you and your friends. That is so close to predatory behavior," he points at the guy and people start backing away from him and his friends.

"She already said no once, you shouldn't try to peer pressure her into coming with you!" Seokjin says, "And she's not alone," he grabs your hand, taking you by surprise, "She came with me. Now screw off before I call security."

Max, along with his friends, were evidently scared of Seokjin now as they all glared at him and left. Your heart was beating fast from anticipating the worst out of the scenario, but Seokjin handled it pretty well. You were too shy to admit it, but he saved your ass today.

The two of you watched as the group of guys left, his hand still clutching onto yours. When they were gone, he looked down at you, "Are you okay?" He asks, concern evident in his voice.

You were at a loss for words. He defended you, and he's still holding onto your hand really right. This was the first time you've ever seen him truly concerned about you. You'd like to think you could've defended yourself as well, but the fact that Seokjin did it for you sent this warm feeling in your chest that you couldn't understand.

"Yeah. Fine," you spoke but it came out as a whisper. You cleared your throat, "Thanks. I really appreciate it."

"No problem," he gives you a small smile, "I don't suppose you still wanna watch this movie?"

"God, no, honestly," you laughed a bit, "I never wanted to."

He laughs and steps out of line and so do you, then he politely mentions the people behind you two to take your place. His hand was still holding yours, and you were beginning to wonder if he had noticed. You didn't let go, either.

"Let's hang out then," Seokjin blurts out. He tries to ignore the feeling of heat on his ears as he looks at you to wait for your response. You tried your hardest not to seem at all fazed.

"Sure."

Seokjin suggests going to an arcade, and so you did. When you got there, you both had to stand outside for ten minutes or so trying to finish the popcorn he bought because food and drinks weren't allowed inside.

"Why'd you buy such a big bag anyway? Were you planning on feeding the whole audience?" You tried to chew and swallow five at a time to hurry up.

"I thought the movie was gonna be boring, this was all I could do," Seokjin says defensively.

"At the rate we're eating this we're gonna get some kind of ulcer," You grumbled.

"You don't seem to be having a problem," he laughs and you playfully slap his arm.

Once you got in, you raced to one of those zombie shooting games. Seokjin was good at aiming and definitely had more kills than you did, but you couldn't help but laugh at how startled he got every time a jumpscare appeared.

"Look at all your deaths, you suck at this," he laughed while pointing at your score.

You blushed, "Ha-ha, funny. I bet you can't beat me at racing," you smirked, challenging him to a race.

"You're on," he grinned.

The two of you then proceeded to one of the car games and true enough, you beat him at it. He wasn't even close to being good. He hit every sidewalk and his car kept slowing down.

"Are you even driving? You might as well run if you even want a chance at winning," You teased as you continuously accelerated.

"How are you so good at this? Are you secretly part of those illegal street racers?" Seokjin was struggling with his car as he moved his steering wheel around.

When you were done racing, Seokjin spots one of those stuffed toy machines. "Do you want one?" He asks jokingly, not actually expecting you to say yes, though he didn't exactly mind getting one for you…

"No. Nuh-uh, that is so cheesy," you laughed and shook your head, "Let's play guitar hero."

It was difficult to admit it to yourself at first, but you were having so much fun with Seokjin. Of course, you two never stopped teasing each other with little insults, but now it felt so much more lighthearted. You started getting along well with him, it no longer felt awkward or forced.

Seokjin felt the same way. In fact, there were moments where he'd subconsciously find himself staring at your lashes, or giving you soft pats when you won a game as an excuse to get close to you. He didn't realize how natural it came to him at all, until he found his gaze fixed upon your smile that sent a warm feeling all over him.

You've never smiled at him so genuinely before. Seeing it now, it was as if your beauty had been completely magnetized. Now all he wanted to do was see more of that smile. In almost all the games you played, Seokjin decided to go easy on you so you'd win most of them. It was amusing to him, seeing you so competitive. Seeing you happy every time you won felt like a win for him as well.

When your eyes shifted to meet his, you noticed how he quickly looked away while the color of his ears turned into that familiar shade of red.

"Let's just play one last game, I'm starving," you held your hand to your stomach.

"Really? After all that popcorn?" He teased, followed by the sound of his own stomach rumbling, making you laugh.

"You tried," you laughed, "Let's play that one." You pointed at the Just Dance machine.

After a minute of arguing on what song to pick, Seokjin ended up choosing (your song of choice). Of all the games you could have picked, you started to regret choosing Just Dance. You didn't even /know/ how to dance, what made you think you could beat him at this game?

You glanced over at Seokjin who was dancing flawlessly and effortlessly. Your mouth dropped, and you stopped dancing altogether to watch him move. He was so focused on the game, he hadn't noticed you stopped playing just to watch him.

Your eyes fixated on his every move. He moved so well, you could feel your heart thumping louder as you watched in awe.

He was so attractive.

Finally, the game was over and Seokjin was surprised to see you standing there, just watching him with your mouth open. He holds back a laugh and moves towards you, placing his finger on your chin making you close your mouth. He was so close to you; you could feel your cheeks heat up.

"Surprised?" He asks.

"Who knew you could dance like that?" You spoke, but mostly to yourself.

"I don't know, natural talent I guess. Why'd you stop dancing, monkey? I thought you'd beat me at it," Seokjin pokes your forehead.

"I was just giving you a chance," You played off, "You should me thanking me."

He raises a brow and smiles, "Then as thanks I'll buy you food, come on."

You both decide to go for churros in a cafe. Seokjin suggested to dine in because you'd probably spill the chocolate as you walked, so you sat across each other in a small but comfortable space. Even though you insisted on paying for your own food, he beat you to it and paid for it instead.

"Just take it as a thank you gift for 'letting me win'," he says while adding air quotes. When he was no longer looking, you broke into a smile at his thoughtful gesture.

"You know, I never thought I'd say this but I'm actually having fun," You told him in manner where you tried to play it cool. He smiles and nods at this.

"See what happens when you aren't busy hating me?" He says with a cheesy smile, "You'll never find anyone as fun as I am."

"Sure, Seokjin," you rolled your eyes, "Just wait ‘til we start practicing and start ripping each other's throats out."

"That's not gonna happen."

"And why is that?"

"I'm confident something's changed," he grins charmingly with eyes looking fond for a moment you had to look away for fear of turning red in front of him.

You cleared your throat, "Whatever you say."

As you two continued to eat, you started talking about all sorts of things. Why you got into acting, how he was so good at dancing, how you and Courtney met. The flow of your conversations came naturally and you found yourselves wanting to know more and more about each other.

Time kept ticking, but you two didn't seem to notice. Even when you were done with your food, neither of you seemed close to running out of things to talk about.

Out of nowhere, Seokjin suddenly stopped and brought his hand close to you and you felt him gently touch your face. You stopped breathing.

"An eyelash," he says while moving his hand back.

"Oh, thanks," you tried hiding how flustered you were.

His phone started ringing, muttering a "One moment," before quickly answering it.

"Josh," he spoke. Your eyes widened.

Courtney!

You checked your own phone as Seokjin spoke to his friend. Your phone was filled with hundreds of messages from her asking where you two were and what you were doing.

"I'm with her," You heard Seokjin say, "You want us to leave you two alone? Then I guess you're doing well."

Leave them alone? That made you look up at him before typing a message to send to Courtney.

I'm with Seokjin and I'm doing great. I'll tell you everything later. I think Josh wants us to leave you guys alone. You alright? Are you having fun? Message me if you need me.

"Alright, see you tomorrow then. No, no it's fine, I'll bring her home," Seokjin continued, "Bye. Stay safe."

"They want us to leave them."

"I have ears, Seokjin."

"Big ones too, monkey," He jokes, "I'm kidding. And stop calling me Seokjin, no one calls me that."

Right, his friends called him Jin.

"Just call me Jin," He says, "None of my close friends call me Seokjin."

"Are you saying we're close friends?"

"I feel like we're moving too fast," He says sarcastically, laughing at his own joke before he continued, "No, our relationship's much more special than that."

You choked on your own saliva, "What?" Did you hear that right? Our relationship's what?

"We're partners that failed a paper and are now working on a movie," He laughs, "I'd say it's been great journey so far."

"And I'd say it's been a pleasure but it really hasn't."

"Seeing as you had fun with me today, I don't think that's true," he smirked. Why was it getting harder to get back at him?

"Shut up," You couldn't think of anything anymore.

You suddenly thought of asking him about it.

The reason why you disliked him so much in the first place. Why he left you alone without telling you.

Does he even remember?

But the mood between you two was great right now, so you decided to push the thought aside and ask some other time.

Shortly after, you two finally left the cafe and walked around, continuing your conversation. After a few more hours later, you decided it was getting late and that you should probably get back. Jin offered to take you home. The ride home was just as fun, blasting music and playing songs that you both knew.

He walked you back to your dorm and you both stopped at the steps outside the building.

"Thanks for today Monkey, I had fun," Jin smiles.

"Stop calling me that," You laughed.

"Then what do you suggest I call you?"

"Your highness."

"Too long. Princess?"

"Jeez, I was kidding," You chuckled nervously, obviously flustered so you took a step back on the first step, "Keep 'Monkey', I don't care."

He raises a brow at your response. "Your replies were better than that," Jin took a step in front of you, your faces were now close and your eyes levelled each other's. You gulped nervously.

"I'm just running out," You said coolly (or at least, in your head you thought it was cool), "You're moving to some new level of annoying and it takes some getting used to."

"I annoy you?" He asks.

"Yes. 24/7."

"I guess I'm living in your mind, rent-free," he smirks, "24/7, huh?"

You were beginning to feel even more flustered now and you knew that Jin noticed by the smirk on his face. He begins to step back and his face turns back to a warm smile.

"You wish," you spoke, "Bye, I'm leaving. Thanks for the drive." Before you could turn your back, Jin takes your hand and holds onto it. You almost muttered an "Oh my god" out loud at his action.

"Y/N, wait," he says, pulling you close to him, making you step down. Your faces were inches apart now.

"What?"

You heart was beating, trying to anticipate what he was gonna do next. Was he gonna lean in? Why was he staring at you like that? His face was so near. Did you want him to lean in?

"The last scene," he spoke.

"What?" Seemed like the only words you knew how to say now.

"The last scene," he spoke again, "We haven't practiced it yet."

Whatever it was you were expecting was off the table as you let out a sigh that Jin thought was out of relief. "Monday, we'll do it Monday. But we can't use the rehearsal room," you told him.

"Yeah, I figured. Where do you wanna practice, then?" He asks.

"Is your place available?" You asked before realizing how suggestive you sounded, "Because Courtney's usually home early."

Seokjin grins, "Yeah, my place is fine."

"Okay, great."

"Great."

"So, I'm gonna go now," You said slowly.

"Right," Jin lets go off you, "I'll see you Monday. For real this time."

"Monday, okay. See you," you waved before turning around and entering your dorm. You resisted the urge to look back and check if had already left, so you walked quickly before you changed your mind.

However, if you did look back, you'd find Jin patiently waiting until you were out of his sight, smiling to himself because of today's events. When he was sure you were gone, he finally left.

Jin was right. Something has definitely changed between you two. The day after your "date", you couldn't stop thinking about the way he was with you. He was kinder, more fun to be around. You didn't expect him to be that thoughtful, either. Of course, he was all these things to others, but now he was like that with you. Then you realized he was all you've been thinking about. It scared you slightly.

He really did live in your mind, rent-free.

"What happened, by the way?" Courtney asked.

You snap out of your thoughts and looked at her, "Yesterday?"

"Yeah, you and Seokjin disappeared."

"We decided not to watch the movie, then we hung out in an arcade."

"You hung out with him?" Courtney eyed you suspiciously, slowly making her way towards you to sit next to you on the bed.

"Yeah."

"And you're both still alive?"

"Yeah."

"So what was he like?" She asks.

"He was… nice. He saved my ass from a group of creepy guys," you smiled as you thought about it, "And he's good at dancing."

"You danced with him?"

"No, on Just Dance."

Courtney just stares, obviously shocked because she never thought you and Seokjin would get along, "You basically went on a date."

"It wasn't a date!" You said defensively, "We just… left you two. Didn't Josh tell Jin to leave you guys?"

"You call him Jin now, that's actually really cute," Courtney teases, then changes her expression to a frown, "Wait, no. Josh never said anything like that."

Huh? But I thought... "What do you mean?"

"He called Seokjin two hours later after you two still didn't show up, then he started going all 'What? What are you saying? No, I never said you two should leave us' and all that," Courtney explained, "Then he said Seokjin offered to take you home and that you two were still together. I got your message minutes later and you said you were doing great so I didn't worry."

"What? But Jin said he asked us to leave you guys…" You trailed off.

"He did? Well Josh never asked you guys to leave."

Oh my God. It didn't make sense. Why would Jin…?

"I'm thinking he wanted to spend more time with you," Courtney says, giving you a teasing look like she knew something. You only look at her. You didn't really know what to say.

It took you a while to sleep that night trying to analyze what was going on with Jin. Every little thing he did stuck in your head and it was making you confused. He affects you now in ways you never thought he ever would, you weren't sure if that terrified you.

One thing's for sure, this was the first time you wanted the weekend to pass by quickly.

You saw Jin on Monday, and the next day, and the day after that. Sometimes you'd practice, other days you'd both just sit down and talk if you were too tired. You still hadn't got the last scene right, both of you were still in the "dialogue-only" phase. Truthfully, you were both just waiting for the other to initiate it first.

On days where you and Jin would decide to just hang out and take a break, you began to notice how much nicer he had become towards you. Apart from that, you noticed him so much more now that you almost admired whatever it was he did.

Today was the last day of your practice and you both finally got through the scene. Tomorrow would be the actual shoot and you were already feeling confident that you'd do well. Just one part made you a bit uneasy, the actual kiss. You could feel how you two were so obviously trying to distract yourselves by doing other things, just to prevent an awkward atmosphere.

"Let's take a break," Jin says tiredly, sitting down on the floor.

"Shouldn't Yoongi be back by now?" You asked and sat down across him.

"No, he's over at his hometown visiting. Says he needs his space on his music project," Jin takes a piece of chip from the bag of snacks you brought, "He'll be back in a few days." You only nodded, staring at the television that was showing a movie with people drinking some fancy wine.

"I want that," you said quietly, mostly to yourself.

"Want what?" Jin looks at you, "That high class society? Fancy people around?"

"No, what they're drinking," You pointed at the wine.

"Wine?" His voice slightly sounding shocked.

"Yeah, I should tell Courtney to go get some…" you muttered absent-mindedly as you continued to watch the people drinking onscreen. Jin suddenly stands up and walks over to their mini fridge. You watched as he pulled a bottle of wine out and proceeded to grab wine glasses from a cabinet.

You sat up straight, not expecting him to actually bring you wine. "What are you doing?"

"You said you wanted wine," he says, setting the glasses down on the small coffee table.

"Yeah, but—" You stared at the bottle, "How do you even have that?"

"Yoongi drinks them to think," He says and pops it open, "I drink them with him." You stared as he poured himself a glass. "Do you want one?" He asks.

You took one of the empty glasses and moved it close to him, so he poured you some as well. Jin sat next to you on the floor as you two sat in silence, watching— no, just staring at the TV screen, sipping on your glasses of wine.

Later on, the TV was shut off and you two went back to talking. Your scripts were set aside on the bed, almost completely forgotten.

"I don't get drunk easily," Jin says, "I think you do, though. You're turning slightly red."

It was either that or because of how close you two were right now.

The wine made you talk so much, much more than usual. Jin found it interesting. He really did have a high alcohol tolerance, and watching you talk about the most random things amused him a lot.

"There's something I wanna know," You spoke, "Two things, actually." This was it. You weren't drunk, but you were beginning to lose the ability to filter the words coming out of your mouth.

"What is it?" He asks softly.

"Why did you tell me Josh told us to leave them alone?" You stared at him, he stared back at you.

"How'd you know about that?" He asks.

"Courtney." You heart beat fast. You knew what you wanted to hear, you just wanted him to say it fast.

"I'll answer you, but you'll have to answer my question after, deal?"

"Deal."

Jin set his glass down before looking deep into your eyes.

"I wanted to spend more time with you." He wanted to say something more than that. Something more serious, but he had to know your answer first.

You weren't sure what to make of that now. It was what you wanted to hear… or was it? Now it could mean completely different things.

"Oh, okay," your face began to heat up, and it wasn't because of the alcohol now, "So what's your question?"

"Why did you hate me so much? I mean, assuming you don't anymore… unless you still do," Jin asks.

"What?"

"What?"

You looked at him, searching for any sign of sarcasm or a tell that he was lying. He wasn't. He looked back at you with a serious expression on his face. There was a silence that lasted for a minute, almost as if time had stopped.

"You don't remember?"

"Don't remember what? Was it something I did?" Jin looks confused. Maybe he really didn't remember. But it only happened eight months ago. Has it really been that long?

"Eight months ago a friend set me up with you," You explained, feeling slightly embarrassed at the context.

"Someone set you up with me?" Jin asks, raising a brow.

"Yeah…" you could feel your face heating up now, "It was supposed to be like a blind date thing, so I initially didn't know it was you. So I went to the place and waited but you stood me up and when I told my friend about it, she told me Kim Seokjin couldn't make it."

"Then when I saw you the next day, you didn't seem to care and it made me so angry— the fact that you never apologized or even talked about it," You continued, "And that made me despise you."

Jin was staring at the floor now trying to recall what happened. He looked lost and confused. He reached out for his glass and took a sip before turning to face you again.

"I don't hate you anymore," You told him, in fact maybe you were beginning to feel the opposite for weeks now.

"Y/n, are you sure that happened? Because I don't remember ever being set up with you—or anyone, for that matter," Jin says, "And believe me when I say that because I've always turned down set ups and blind dates and whatnot."

"Huh?"

"I swear, that really wasn't me. Someone must've used my name."

"Why would someone use your name?"

"I don't know, I—" He runs his hand through his hair, "I've been told there are guys who are jealous of me or something. Maybe they used my name to get back at me."

"That's so low," you felt a pang of guilt now. You've been hating on him for all the wrong reasons, everything suddenly felt like a false memory. If only you'd known sooner, "What the fuck," you muttered quietly.

"What the fuck indeed," Jin sighs.

"I'm so sorry, I should've known," You looked at him.

"No, don't be. I'm sorry you had to go through that, and I apologize you thought it was me all along," He held your hand, "If anything, I should've known. You were never just mean to anyone on purpose. I should've asked you."

There was silence between you two as he stared at both of your hands intertwined, while you stared at his face, trying to get everything to sink in.

"What was your second question?" Jin finally asks.

"Why you stood me up," you laughed, "Turns out you didn't."

"You know," Jin spoke while his free hand reached for his glass. He finishes the drink in his hand before continuing, "If you did ask me out, I wouldn't leave you out in the cold."

You laughed, "Why would I ask you out?"

"I don't know. Got any ideas?" Jin teased. You smiled and bit your lip, not knowing what to say next. The lip bite did things to him, but he was trying his very best not to seem at all fazed before realizing he was already staring at your lips.

Maybe you were tipsy enough to finally do this.

You drank your wine and grabbed your script from the bed. Jin watched as you flipped over to the last scene.

"Michael," you began reading your lines as you stood, Jin's hand leaving yours, "You know we can't do this. It'll ruin everything."

Jin doesn't even need his script anymore due to the countless times you've both practiced the dialogues alone, "It's not gonna ruin everything, or anything for that matter." He stands up to face you.

"Yes, it will. You know how this will risk our friendship. This won't end well."

"Your eyes tell me otherwise."

"I don't—"

"You do, and you know it," Jin moves closer now, and you can feel your heart beating.

"Emily, I love you. I always have, and you know that. I know you feel the same." He places his hand on your waist. There were no lines left for you to read now, just one last thing your characters needed to do.

It was at this point where you both felt the wine was getting to your system.

He leaned in close, staring at your lips as you slowly moved back. When you couldn't anymore, you felt his lips meet yours, and before you knew it, he was kissing you— and you were kissing him back. You could feel his soft lips pressing against yours as your hands travelled up to his chest. You both fell back onto his bed as the kiss progressed into a rougher pattern of movements. Your hands grabbed onto his shirt while one of his hands gripped onto your waist, the other pushed back onto the mattress for support.

When you two pulled away to gasp for air, the awkwardness of the position you two were in never registered your brain. Instead, your eyes met each other's, searching for any sign of denial. When Jin sensed that there was none, he crashed his lips back onto yours.

Your mind was overflowing with euphoria and adrenaline. You were nervous, excited— you didn't know what was going to happen next. The moment his lips started trailing down your neck, small sounds began to escape from your lips. Whimpers that drove Jin wild as he began to pick up the pace.

The scene about to happen was no longer part of the script, but you were both more than willing to play the part.

The next morning, you woke up next to Jin who was sleeping soundly with his arms wrapped around you. Last night's events started coming back to you as you gently tried to squiggle out of his hold.

Panic was the first feeling that rushed over you.

1. The shoot was in a few hours and here you were, dressed in Jin's oversized shirt and sweat pants.

2. Your tendency to over think began creeping in.

What if he only did it because of the heat of the moment? You suddenly felt a wave of embarrassment because you thought you had initiated the whole thing with the script reading and all. Maybe he liked you. Maybe he didn't. Neither of you said anything about liking the other last night, so what if it didn't mean anything? You couldn't deal with this right now, so you silently picked up your things and left.

It was still pretty early in the morning, so you tried your best not to make a sound while Courtney was asleep. You took a shower and got ready before you headed out and went to the place where you had to film.

The group of upperclassmen greeted you as you walked in and made your way to Oliver, who would be directing the whole film.

"Hey, y/n. Glad you're here early, where's Jin?" Oliver asks.

"I think he's on his way," you lied. As if on cue, Jin enters the room and people start to greet him. Oliver calls him and Jin makes his way to you two. You couldn't look at him at all.

"You two should start changing, we'll start in 30," Oliver announces and you two head for the changing rooms. You walked a little faster to avoid conversation.

For the rest of the filming process, you both received compliments from everyone on your acting skills. You barely needed to repeat takes which was a relief. You and Jin had the perfect chemistry.

Jin kept trying to talk to you in between breaks, but you'd just give short and simple answers, sometimes just avoiding him altogether. You just couldn't bring yourself to make any eye contact that wasn't on set, or else you'd feel this churning feeling in your stomach and it made you uncomfortable. Soon enough, Jin got the idea and suddenly turned all silent as he observed your every move.

Finally, you had to shoot the last scene. You tried your very best not to appear bothered which seemed to work because no one has asked about why you look so uneasy. Jin was trying his best not to beg you to tell him what was wrong.

"I want you guys to give this your best shot. This scene is the most important, and I need to see more of your chemistry, got it?" Oliver tells them.

The cameras began rolling and Oliver shouts "action".

"Michael, you know we can't do this. It'll ruin everything." You were sat on a sofa and Jin was standing next to it.

"It's not gonna ruin everything, or anything for that matter." Jin says his line and sits close, next to you. You look back at him.

"Yes, it will. You know how this will risk our friendship. This won't end well." You stood up and turned away from him.

He places his hands on your waist and turns you around for your eyes to meet. He pauses for a brief second before his line, "Your eyes tell me otherwise."

"I don't—"

"You do, and you know it." Jin continues, pulling you closer to him. "Emily, I love you. I always have, and you know that. I know you feel the same." he places his hand on your cheek, and you both stare at each other.

"Maybe I do," you muttered, shocking Jin. He continues the act and finally pulls you in for a kiss. Everything came flashing back. You wanted more than what you two had now, it was so easy to see.

"Cut!" Oliver shouts and he begins to clap and you and Jin began to pull away. He looks at you for a moment, and you look back at him.

"Y/n, that improvisation was amazing!" Oliver shouts, still clapping his hands together. You snap out of it and laugh nervously, "Thanks."

"If I hadn't known better, I'd think you two were seeing each other," Oliver teases, "I'm glad you two took this role. Thanks, you guys."

After a few more praises from Oliver, you headed back to the changing room to wear your normal clothes. Scenes of your kiss and scenes from last night began replaying in your mind. You wanted to ask him what it meant, but you were afraid to be the only one falling.

You left the changing room and decided to leave quietly. As you were about to head out, you heard a voice call from behind you.

"Y/n."

The voice alone made you stop in your tracks. There was no need to turn around to know who it was; it was Jin. He walked over to you, holding your wrist so you would face him.

"You're avoiding me," he spoke. You looked around, checking if the coast was clear. When you decided it was, you soon.

"I'm not," you lied.

"Stop lying," the hurt in his voice was evident, "You are. You wouldn't even answer my texts."

"You texted?" You hadn't checked your phone since you left his apartment, "I haven't checked my phone."

"Why did you leave?" He had this disappointed look on his face. Knowing it was because of you made you feel even worse.

"Honestly? I was scared," you admitted.

"Of what?"

"That we only did that because of the heat of the moment. That it was all just for fun. That it was because of the alcohol. That it meant nothing."

"Is that really what you think?"

"No," You looked down, "I mean, I'd like to think it isn't."

"Y/n, you know it isn't," Jin said quietly.

"I didn't think it was," he admits, making you look up at him, "I meant it all. Me wanting to spend time with you. Walking you home. Kissing you. It all meant something to me."

"It did?"

"Yeah. When you fell asleep before I did, you looked so peaceful. I started thinking about how I could look at you forever, and the thought of waking up next to you made me happy," He held your hand, "But when I woke up, you were gone."

"I'm sorry, Jin, I just—" You sighed, "I thought of all the worst things and left. I panicked. That's really all I can say." He nodded.

"But did you mean what you set on set? Or was it really just improv?" He asked, his eyes staring deeply into yours.

You nodded, "Yeah, I did."

Jin just nodded and looked at your eyes. Had you really upset him this much?

"Jin, I'm really s—"

Before you could finish your apology, Jin takes his free hand and grabs you by the waist, pulling you closer for a kiss.

This time it felt different.

It felt so, real. No alcohol, no script. It was just Jin.

You wanted it to last forever.

When you two finally pulled away, Jin was the first to speak.

"I like you, a lot, y/n. And I've realized that for a while now," he tells you.

"I like you too," you couldn't help but smile, ignoring at how much your cheeks burned. It was fine, Jin's ears were just as red, "Even though you suck at racing games and my ideal boyfriend is an illegal street racer.”

Jin laughs, and you couldn't help but laugh with him because of all this. All the banter turned to compliments and all the eye-rolling turned to kisses. Now you were more than just partners who failed a paper and ended up working on a movie.

"That's alright, Monkey," Jin grins before placing a kiss on your forehead.

"The only thing I need to keep racing is your heart, not a car."

a/n: sorry it got longer than expected. anyways if you read until here, thank you for reading! i hope you liked it! send me comments/asks anytime if u want.

also, if you’d like to read my two other works, here are the links!

let’s fall in love for the night

welcome to my youtube channel

which are both taehyung x readers.

see you in my next fic/edit!

[paradise-creator]

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Amorette's song:

An royal Au! Ushijima x reader. You, are his queen but he knew you were only a dream, a wish. But dreams and wishes are meant to come true.

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 2.1k

Ushijima knew what was to come of his dream. His dream that one day you would be his queen as you both rule Shiritorizawa. The dream that he wished will come true. They say that reams are impossible, like how wishes are so far out your reach. But he was determined to make you his queen, his lover, and his one and only. That was a bold statement coming from the 13 year old prince. He knew that it will never come true. You, the sophisticated, the amazing, and wonderful princess of your kingdom. He knew that you will never be his queen, you were 3 years older, after all. That age gap, isn’t big nor is the relationship entirely impossible. But, as the crowned princess, Ushijima knew that you would be married off. That you would be in another’s arms. That you weren’t his.

“Ushi,” Your voice echoed in his ears. “Yes?” He responded as he looked up from his book. His eyes laid on your relaxed figure. To him you were so perfect, a goddess reincarnated. You inspire him to be the best king he could be to his people. You were his inspiration, his drive to be better for his people. You had such a huge impact in his life that everyone can see how he adored you. As he peered your gaze, he realized how sad they look. The shin in your eye, dead. The smile on your lips didn’t reach your eyes. He immediately knew something was wrong. “Is there something wrong?” He then added as he placed his book down and sat beside you. He would stop anything just to make you happy. You were the queen of his heart after all.

“I’m being married off to a prince. A prince, I know nothing off,” You responded as you looked at him. As those words left your lips, his dreams and heart shattered. But he wasn’t surprised, it is to be expected. His eyes widen, his heart shattered but he remained stoic. “As heirs, we fulfill our duties as rulers of our kingdoms,” He then said as he looked away, not wanting to see how sad your eyes look. You were his weakness and he can’t bare the sad look on your face. “At least I know that I taught you something,” You then said as you patted his head. You stood up and glance at him before leaving. That was all you wanted to do, you wanted to give him space, knowing that he needs time to digest it. You knew that this would impact the both of you greatly. But as the crown princess, it’s duties before your heart. That is what no fairy tale tell its readers. And ever since that moment, you two tried to spend as much time together. From frolicking in the garden to reading together. You both made more memories that will hopefully help the growing emoty space.

But that was 5 years ago. 5 years of him yearning to see you again, to hear your voice. 5 years of having an empty space in his heart. A void only you can fill. The two of you did was exchanged letters, but he wanted to see you, wanted to see if you are okay. He had heard that your supposed groom, had an affair and the whole thing was cancelled. But, he still wasn’t able to see you. You haven’t contacted him in 3 years. He has grown wary and depressed. Why is life so unfair sometimes? But that is the world we live in. He thought he would never get to see you again. But here you were, in front of him, talking to your old friends. Where have you been these 5 years? And now, of all places, he was able to see you. Kuroo wasn’t wrong when he said he will invite everyone.

“Pardon me,” He then said to Daichi, who was talking to him a while ago. Daichi saw where Ushijima was looking and chuckled. The smaller king knew who she was. The supposed future queen of Shiritorizawa, as he was acquainted with. “I wish you luck, my friend,” He then said before he left the taller to go to you. Daichi knew that this king wouldn’t let you go, no matter how hard he tried. All the blackette could do is wish his friend luck. Ushijima took a deep breath and started to walk towards you. Which the other girls had notice, and nudged you a bit. “Pardon my intrusion, my ladies,” He then said with a bow once he had reach where you were. “It’s no bother, your majesty. We were about to leave anyway,” your friends said as they left you alone. You were still the beauty goddess you once were. But you’ve grown more mature and look so gorgeous that Ushijima can’t help but blush.

“Ushi, honey, you’ve grown so much,” You said as you placed your hand on his cheek. His blush darkened as he looked away. Your touch, it’s something that he longed for. Your voice, your honey like voice. He missed how you sounded and how you talked. Whether gentle and soft or rough and oud, he loved it. As he turned back to you, his eyes had the same look on them ever since he was younger. A look of adoration and love, something that had always been with him. When it’s about you, all he can think about is how he loves you. Your so called imperfections is all perfect to him. You were a goddess to him. You were perfect to him. “It’s been 5 years, Nee-chan. Of course, I have grown,” He said as he leaned into your touch. “5 years? It really has been that long,” You then said as you retracted your hand. But, Ushijima grabbed you hand gently and intertwined with his. “What happened to you?” He then asked as he looked at you. “You stopped sending me letters 3 years ago,” He said softly. His eyes pleading you to explain your disappearance.

You chuckled and shook your head. “I needed a break from the spot light,” You then said as you adjusted your crown. “After that affair incident, I ruled over my kingdom in peace. And I didn’t want to bother you anymore so I stopped. Not knowing whether or not you wanted to talk to me,” You added. “I’m happy that your kingdom is in great condition but I would never grow tired of you. Never,” He then said as he looked at you. There was an awkward silence that fell between the two of you. It’s been 3 years since the last you two talked and 5 years since the two of you have seen each other face-to-face. Ushijima cleared his throat and let go of your hand. He then stood in front of you and bowed. “Would you do me the honor of accompanying me to a more secluded place?” He then said as he offered his hand. You smiled and accepted his offer. He interlaced your hands and started to lead the both of you to a secluded area. The twist and turns of the crowd seem never ending. But soon enough, you both reached an open balcony.

“This is better, isn’t it?” Ushijima said as he led on the railing, with you by his side. He looked at you and he was mesmerized. You, you looked so good in your dress. The color complimented your skin and your body type. You look ravishing. Your accessories and make-up brought out the most defining features. Everything he had learned to love. His heart beat quickened and his cheeks flushed. Even after 5 years, his heart still belongs to you. He waited and waited for you, and now that you are in front of him. He just can’t believe his eyes, you grew so much.

Not only with looks but as a person as well. He can see how you matured as a person. You seem more at peace. You seem more mature than what you were then. “The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” You said as you looked at him. His cheeks turned red and he cleared his throat. A phrase he never thought he would here. The moon is beautiful, isn’t it? Another way to confess love. Especially popular under the moon light in his kingdom. “Pardon, what was that?” He asked as he started at your eyes. “The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?” You then repeated as you held his hand. “I can die happy,” He responded as he smiled softly. A reply that completes the phrase. “H-how long had you liked me?” He asked shyly. “Ever since we were younger,” You then said as you looked up to the moon. “I knew you liked me and it was mutual but as crowned princess I knew I had to fulfill my duties. So I kept it a secret,” You added.

“You’ve been hiding it all this time?” He asked as he cupped your cheek. “If you would’ve told me sooner, I would’ve fight for your hand,” He said as he kissed your forehead. He wanted you to know that he won’t stop waiting and loving you. He wants to fight for you, showing you that he is the one for you. “That’s what I didn’t want to happen,” You said. “If you did fight for my hand, it might lead to war, which is counter-productive,” You added.

“Nevermind that, Can I finally call you my queen?” He asked as he hugged you. “I want the world to know that my heart belongs to you,” He added. The moonlight shone on you two as if you both were the main characters. The fairy tales you’ve read can’t fully describe what the princess felt when she met her one true prince. The way that both of your hearts beat in synch and the fluttering feeling. The tales can’t grasp the way he held you. He held you tight as if he were to let go, you would run away. Yet, he also held you as if you were made of porcelain, one wrong move and you’ll break. The fairy tales were right, once you find your true love, doubts and troubles seem to fade away.

“Of course, I’m yours and yours alone,” You said as you looked at him. He slowly leaned in and kissed you softly. With his soft lips on yours eyes flutter shut. You both held each other and savor the feeling. It felt as if time had slowed down. The way his hands wrapped around you protectively. The way your lips danced with his. It all felt surreal, something out of the tales you grew to love. As the music played in the background, you and he felt the dreamlike feeling of being in a fairy tale. It felt like forever when the kiss ended, cliché as it sounds, it feels so true. As you both stared to each other’s eyes, a familiar music came right along.

The intro for “This is Love” from the movie Cinderella. Ushijima smiled and offered his hand. “Shall we dance?” He asked. You accepted this offer and grabbed his hand. He placed your free hand on his shoulder and his on your waist. He then started guiding you to the rhythm. Contrary to the music, you both danced in a slightly faster pace, like in the movie. Your dress swayed, back and forth. He pulled you close, still managing to lead the dance, like a prince should. You felt like Cinderella and he was your prince charming. As you both dance within the area of the balcony, the moon’s light and the stars blessed the earth with their beauty. The song continues on but that wasn’t the only thing you heard. The whispers of the wind, the soft songs of the creature, and the chatter from the hall. But, all that didn’t matter to you. All you can focus on was the words that left Ushijima’s lips.

“You are my world,”

“You are my dream, my queen,”

“I love you, so much,”

“I dearly hope this moment would last just a bit longer,”

Ushijima spoke phrases and words that makes your heart pound. His words and this scene etched into your heart as the song continues. Once the song ended, you both were in the dead center of the balcony. Staring at his olive orbs, you know that this is where you belonged. He was your home, your sanctuary. “And I’ll love you always and eternally,” He then said as he pecked your lips. Even a simple action like that, it sent shivers down your spine. This is what Ushijima had dreamt about. You, in his arms, secured and safe. You, his future queen. It’s everything he could ever hope and asked for.

Dreams are a wish your heart makes. No matter how your heart is grieving. If you keep on believing, dreams that are wish, will come true.

[rebloged-content]

Recommended Sanders Sides creators

Marry Christmas, everyone! And a wonderful December day to all of you who don’t celebrate Christmas, too. Let’s be honest right off the bat, though: I’m only using the date as an excuse to do this list anyways.

So. Throughout the time I’ve spent as a part of this wonderful corner of the sanders sides fandom over here on tumblr, I’ve often found a new creator and wished I’d found them sooner. It kind of makes me wonder who else I might miss. If you do to, here are a few creators I’d love for you to check out. You’ll probably recognize some of the names, if not all, but maybe you’ll find a new favorite creator here?

And to the creators in question, I really love your content. If you’ve made it onto this list, you’ve definitely cause one or two sleepless nights of reading for me, because who needs sleep if I can have this, right? XD Whatever you’ll find written next to your name is the impression you’ve left on me and… Well, just know that you’ve made some days of my life at least a little happier, all of you. And I hope to repay the favor by telling you how much I appreciate you releasing your content into this world… Well, repay the favor at least a little, I suppose.

Let’s begin, then, shall we?

@5am-the-foxing-hour Because this? This is who you go to if you want to read good Janus-content. You are in a mood to read sympathetic Janus? Wanna see the danger noodle just casually interact with other sides? Go to their short stories. I mean, “the cult”? Prime example of how to tell a story with impact in just a few words. 8 paragraphs, but boy did I read that one on repeat. Or “water spray bottle”, this one is fun, short and will make you laugh. An energy drink for the fander heart, so to say.

Then there’s their mafia-au, “there’s more in me than precious metals”. Six are out so far, and I adore every single word of every single part of this. Protective Remus, sassy Janus, angst, comedy relief, destruction, Roman-Remus-sibling-rivalry, braincell Logan, survival instinct Virgil, working together over a common enemy… This fic has it all, believe me. Take your time and read it, because you will read the entire thing in one go once you start. At least I did, and I didn’t even notice.

And their advent writings? Those had me squealing and jumping around in a way I will deny if anyone ever sees it. I don’t even know what else to say, they are fucking fantastic and that’s that.

So, yeah. Go check them out, before I start fangirling about them even more. You know my personal favorites now, so just go there. You won’t regret it.

Next up is @coconut-cluster. Ah, yes, Lexi. Lexi, whose uni-AU started as self indulgent and has become the loceit story on tumblr. We all know her, or at least most of us do, and we all love her too. And while I also drop everything I do at any point of time I possibly can once I realize the uni-au has any form of new addition, there are a lot of other fics created by her that you should check out as well.

Did you, for example, ever want a sappy prinxiety one-shot with the sappiness only being implied, a mutual understanding of “we’re-not-saying-we-care-but-we-both-know-we-do” born from joking reassurances and a not-a-date-nope-only-a-break? While that may seem to be a tall order, that is exactly what “before the sun goes down” is. Plus there’s ice cream. Or maybe you’re more of a logince fan? Do you want a fic where Roman isn’t the prince but serves His Highness? Do you like sincere talks while you’re procrastinating showing your face to the subjects you don’t really want to rule over? In that case, you really should read “Viva la Vida”. Careful, though, this one is so sweet you’ll probably get a toothache… There also is an analogical fic that I’ve enjoyed very much: “Cracks in the Ceiling”. I love it, because it’s just calm. Fears creeping up on you, thrown away by a trusted friend with a few words, just by being there and playing into the metaphors you head created this time around. It’s calm, and there’s not really a climax or anything, but it doesn’t need one. Because it’s just a glance into everyday life. It’s beautiful in its own right, really.

What I’m saying is, Lexi has a lot more wonderful stories to tell than the uni-au. It’s the most popular one, sure, and it’s one of her best works. But you really should check out her other fics as well. Lexi herself once said that she writs fics she’d like to read. I would figure it’s because of this, but her stories are mostly things you don’t really find anywhere else. Dynamics, stories, world building, all of those are aspects you may find somewhere else. But Lexi is just one of those people who see what they miss in a fandom and create it themselves, and among these creators Lexi is my favorite. She just has that certain skill that makes that approach to writing result in the most enjoyable reading experiences. Lexi’s fics are special, because they’re different, because they are authentic and you can feel that when you’re reading her work.

@djpurple3 is another talented individual I want to talk about. I have to confess, DJ is, as far as original content goes, almost exclusively locked in my brain with the fiction “I just keep loosing my beat”. 23 Chapters so far, one better than the last. It’s a bitter-sweet story following Remus and his children, after the bitch of a mother has been brought behind bars. Abusive piece of shit. Yeah, I don’t like her much. But the story is so full of love and support, everyone trying their best, everyone seeing how much the others deserve the world and wishing they could give it to them… Roman and Remus have a sibling-dynamic I would die for here, too. Patton is just the most adorable friend to Deceit - here Damion - Virgil is a precious bean, Logan is cute and the teacher we all wish he’d had ourselves and… god, I could keep gushing about this fic forever. I’ll stop now, though, before I’ll start spoiler things. Wouldn’t want to do that, especially since I really, really, really want more people to give this a go. It’s not underrated, I just think everyone who doesn’t is missing out by a lot, so… Go over there and read DJ’s fic right fucking now, if you haven’t already read it at least once. Thank you.

@delimeful​, our wonderful lime-friend with a cute cat making a terrifying face in his header. First of all, there is the WIBAR universe, short for “Watch it burn and rust”. 5 chapters in act one, 4 intermissions (one of those with three chapters), one chapter of act two, as well as three extras and an au of this au called “the end of being alone”, and I’ve lost count of how many nights I spent reading those instead of sleeping like I should. (Or interacting with family. Or being productive. Or… It’s really a good story, okay?!) WIBAR is a deathworlder au. So a space au in which humans are regarded as dangerous deathworlders who can survive on a deathworld like earth. In other words, Virgil is the only human, and boy does that scare everyone around him. And the best part? You can feel the development, the shift in mentality regarding Virgil, feel the moment approach in which he isn’t a threat but a companion instead.

And, apart from the fic that inspired me enough to start writing “TINND!R?” over on my writing blog, there are a lot more amazing fics to read on lime’s blog. He wrote “How easy you are to need”, for example. It’s soft, it pulls at just the right heartstrings, it’s achingly hopeful and, god, the ending still has me in tears, even after the fifth - ? sixth? something among those lines - reread. This one’s a werewolf au, actually. Virgil is the werewolf, Logan, Patton and Roman are the humans.

Do you want yourself some of that pre-AA dynamic? I’d recommend “to taste your beating heart”. In this, Virgil gets separated from the rest of his group of vampire hunters and gets turned into a vampire himself, loosing his memories. And he’s “Anx” now, not “Virgil”, goddamnit! He isn’t their friend anymore, why don’t they understand that? Well, probably because they can still see Virgil’s old habits shining through. There’s a lot of tension, a lot of angst and a whole lot of frustration involved in this.

He also wrote some amazing one-shots. They’re mostly so well written that I’m almost sad not to be waiting on a continuation. There’s “the littlest mermaid”, in which Virgil goes to investigate a noise, finding a scared, tiny mermaid in need of help. In “community gardens” we have Remus being Remus, gaining the interest and friendship of the forest’s giant Logan. “Magical mutualism” tells the tale of a witch and a demon making a pact beneficial to both parties and opening the doors neither could have gone beyond alone. The way we’re all confused about our ships not actually having set sail yet comes to a hight in Virgil in regards to his friends in “amateur matchmakers”. And this is the point at witch I stop talking before I actually recommend every single one of lime’s fics instead of just my favorites as I had planed because I started to gush too much… XD

Let’s move on to @muppenthings​. Mupp is an amazing artist and she created a giant mermaid au. There’s this one orca who’s just… We love her, but I actually don’t think she’s the brightest. I really, really love her, though. Virgil himself is being a little protective over his human friends and casually so. I love this comic series for the art style, but I also love the way it makes me crack a laugh at least once per work. Or appeal to my mother-instincts, if it’s about baby Virgil. Too cute for his own good, I tell ya! And the facial expressions! The detail, the jokes, everything about this is wonderful. You should at least take a look.

@whenisitenoughtrees​. Cat got me with “This cup of yours tastes holy (This lie is dead)”. “A slow voice on a wave of phase” was next, later “Infinity and beyond”, “we are not alone in the dark with out demons” and “changing of the guard”. And then, suddenly, the night was over. I’ve read almost all of the fics in one go, and I’ve been semi-frequently visiting her master post ever since. When “There’s an endless road to rediscover” came out just a little while back, that lead to me re-reading through almost the entire list. I don’t regret it, my plans for that weekend would like to disagree.

These six fics I mentioned here are, by no means, the only ones I enjoyed. Those are just the ones I’ve found myself opening up again and again in sleepless nights. Those are the ones that pop up in my head and have me smiling to myself in the middle of god-knows-whatever-I’ve-been-doing-at-the-time.

Angst, fluff, hurt-comfort, you’ll find everything in that list. And something I’ve grown to like about Cat’s fics even more than anything else is the quick change between feeling perplexed, a startled laugh at certain wordings (you’ll know what I’m talking about when you see it) and apprehension. These fics will have you at the edge of you seat, swooping you away on an emotional roller coaster. And, god, the way Cat writes from Remus’ perspective? The introductions of her stories and the way she redirects to the main topic after going into detail on something? I saved a few paragraphs as screenshots on my phone because I love them and I want to read them again when I’m down. I just… Cat’s great.

Next up is @eliemo. Because Elias Virgil is the royalty of Virgil angst. From the touch-starved Virgil we’ve all had a head cannon of at one point in “Heart of Ice”, over ace Virgil panicking over telling his boyfriends that he his ace and didn’t think to tell them before in “Love our way” to so, so much more.

Mostly EV follows the story arc of an underlying feeling of dread at the beginning, which slowly grows into panic, exploding in a storm of angst and concludes in everyone, or at least whoever is around, coming to the rescue and helping to calm down, with the end being the hope for getting better in the future. They always manage to convey the confusion, fear or just the general thought process so well that you can’t help but get absorbed in the story. They know exactly what to say and what to leave between the lines to get the maximum effect. And, your heart will definitely be shattered after their angst. Still, the way the sides comfort each other and support each other so well every time is just… I love their stories, a lot.

I want to make two more suggestions if you want to check out this creator. A Janus angst fic, which can only be described as “ouch” you’ll find under the name “snake bite”. It hurts in the best way possible, because Janus gets the comfort he deserves.

The other suggestion gets a lot darker. It’s about Virgil having been abused by the “others” before he got accepted into the light side. The others are shocked to find out what has gone on behind their backs and they help Virgil in every way they can to recover. Of cause it’s a rocky path, though. This would be “Learned Behavior”. The series/au has twelve stories so far, one of which has two parts. You’ll find the master post for this pinned to the top on their blog.

If you like angst, you should also give @maybedefinitely404​ a look. Ly has a soulmate-au going, in which they use the concept of “you hear the music your soulmate listens to”. "Music in my head” is a prinxiety fic, but the two of them have yet to meet. Four chapters and two mini-fics in. The reason I mentioned angst is because in this - spoiler alert for the first few chapters here - , Virgil gets put through conversion therapy. Luckily Janus and Logan are better foster parents than the ones who did that to him.

They also have a master list for all their soulmate stories, featuring different ships. Apparently they participated in soulmate month, if I understood that correctly. And to be honest, that was how I even found their account. I absolutely adore their anxceit fic, which takes place in a human au. It’s starting off pretty sad, but the bonding moments are absolutely wonderful. It’s a lovely story, and the ending is one of the best ones I’ve yet to read. Their logince fic took my breath away, too. A flower shop/tattoo artist au, and Logan is the tattoo artist. Stunning writing, wonderful world building, just the right amount of backstory to have everything make sense without overwhelming/drowning the reader in unnecessary details. Their moxceit fiction… Well, this one had me in tears within the first few paragraphs. It’s terrible and you feel for Janus, whose perspective this is written from. The ending, though… Gods! The ending was so indescribably cute. To be honest, all of the soulmate stories are great, these three are just my personal favorites.

Concerning their one shots, you’ll probably have to figure it out on your own concerning this. I haven’t been able to read all of them yet, as sad as that makes me. Definitely palling on doing it in the future, though. I did read two of them, though. “Pippity poppity” really was amusing, and I am so looking forward to the second part of “The Boy who sings next door”. The way they write the dynamics between the sides? I live for that.

Another creator I would like to recommend is @maybe-im-tired.They don’t have a master post, as far as I could see, but they only post their content anyways, so… “Can’t take my eyes off of you” is my favorite out of their fics so far. I mean, the way they managed to fit the sheer chaos that is intrulogical into this one short fic is amazing. And you could take about two thirds of what Remus said and put it up on your wall as out-of-contexts-quotes. Don’t worry, he says them out of context anyways, and they will definitely make you laugh. 

The series of short stories for the human au that starts with “Glowing stars” is another au by them that you will almost certainly like. We have Logan and Virgil as kids (about 7 I think), Remus and Patton as single parents, Roman as the most adoring uncle, Emile as babysitter and Remy as his amazing partner. Remus is a great father, wonderfully chaotic as well. And a teacher! Imagine that, Remus as your teacher... He’s great with kids though, as long as they aren’t entitled villains come to make his precious Virgil feel bad, that is.

They also wrote a bunch of “random one shots”. They are all amazing, but my favorite has to be this one. It’s a logince one, once again human au. Patton may or may not tell his big brother’s crush about the feelings he wasn’t prepared to share yet. You know, as small kids do. It’s soft, it will make you smile as much as Logan does, and I love Remus in it. I generally like how they write Remus, okay? I know how much I’ve said it, but I’m not even exaggerating. They always write him differently, and all versions they write him as are so, so lovable and just… I wanna hug the life out of all Remus versions they wrote, okay? Take a look, you’ll know why.

Anyways. Let’s continue with @figurative-siren-song. This is the last account I’ve followed and I’m still sad about it having taken me this long to find them. Little salty, to be honest. (I’ll stick to they/them because they said just not to use she/her, and, well… consistency, you know? Don’t have much, so I have to get what I can XD). When I finally did find them, I went through their entire master list (at least all of the ships with characters I actually know. I’m kinda bad with the shorts characters, so I usually just… avoid them? Idk. Personal preference, I guess), and, well… I would honestly recommend every single fic on that list. They call themself “Repair Fluff King™️” and they deserve that title. But when they warn you that a fic will be angsty, it will be angsty.

I found them through the anxceit fic “A Deal”. Well, through an animatic by their friend on youtube that had linked the fic, but details. I’ve been reading this fic up and down again and again. It’s just so good! And when they talk in the second part and Janus explains why he proposed that deal. Or in the continuation, which i can’t talk about because I will probably spoiler things! So wholesome!

 Also, their losleepxeity fic “We’re worth it”. So soft! The nicknames, the plot, the everything. It’s softer than clouds look, and we all know that means something.

But, really. Everyone will find something for them by this creator. So many ships, all incredibly well written, and soft and fluffy without getting boring in the slightest. It’s as energizing as coffee, actually. And, let’s be honest, this whole fandom drowns itself in angst most of the time. Take a break from that, repair your broken hearts with goof fluffy content that you’ll want to read over and over again. Go check this creator out. You will love them. 

Last but not least… @myfriendsasthesides​ A blog by a creator who just takes the wonderfully chaotic dynamics of a friend group and using that to give us content of incorrect sides quotes. Maybe it doesn’t fit with me going on and on about fics here. I don’t care. Follow them and turn on those notifications, please, because seeing even one post of theirs on your dashboard will make your day. It’s funny, it’s absurd, it’s chaotic, it’s making you jealous of them for having friends like that. Believe me, you will want to see those posts. It’s just… the random shots of serotonin and dopamine out generation needs really fucking desperately 100% of the time. 

That’s it with the list! Eleven creators I absolutely adore, and I’m sorry I was babbling so much all the way through, but… Well, actually I’m not sorry. And actually, half of the reason I even made this post is to tell them how much I love them and fangirl about them a bit. So… Yeah. Well.I love you guys and hope you’ll have a wonderful day! And to everyone else reading this: I hope this helped you ind some new creators you can enjoy. And a good day to you too, of cause.

Sincerely, Joy 🖤

(@joylessnightsky/@sanders-sides-fic)

[wingsofthewibbets]

Hello I Made A Playlist

It is specifically for the vibes of the Calamity Trio! Also, I feel like contributing to fandom, so I tried to explain why I felt each song gave off the ~Vibe~. Apologies for the length of this monstrosity. It’s on Youtube and Spotify, but there is a song on Youtube I used that was unavailable on Spotify. It’s in no particular order, although maybe I’ll organize it one day.

~‘California Friends’ (The Regrettes)- Generally the fun upbeat vibe of the song, but also these specific lyrics make me think of Anne’s :

     I think I love you but then I think

     No way!

     I gotta go but I wanna stay

    Just stay!

    I guess I’ll save it for another day, well okay?

As well as:

     I get mixed up in my head, you do too

     But I don’t forget a thing you’ve said

     Well that’s true

I think the lyrics definitely give me more Anne/Marcy vibes, but the music itself makes me think of Sasha getting them into trouble. There’s some big garage band energy here, and it just makes me think of them running around and causing chaos. (also the ‘i gotta go but i wanna stay/just stay’ definitely reminds me of the end of the aquarium episode)

~’The Archer’ (Taylor Swift)- Oh man this song where do I even start?? There is so much?? (I know I’ve already talked about this one, but Imma do it again) I was listening to this song one day and the lyrics hit me so hard as reminding me of all the girls, specifically:

For Anne:

    Combat, I’m ready for combat

    I say I don’t want that, but what if I do?

    ‘Cause cruelty wins in the movies

    I’ve got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you

I feel like this is pretty self-explanatory, but this seriously makes me think of her relationship with Sasha -or the shambles of it anyway oof- and the speeches line just makes me there’s so much that she doesn’t tell her friends about what’s running through her head. 

Anne’s an emotional person to be sure, but she’s also a very impulsive one, which means a lot of times, what people get from her is the unedited, unreflected version of her thoughts, which don’t make them any less true, but that also means that she’s probably a little more reticent with the deeper ideals that don’t get unearthed through dramatic moments. She just does things a lot of the time, and when she gets stuck on something, it is kinda obvious from the outside, but she also gets uncomfortable with trying to talk about it, because there is no clear solution she can enact in the moment to resolve it.

For Sasha:

    Screaming who could ever leave me, darling?

    But who could stay?

    I see right through me, I see through me

As well as the repetition of ‘they see right through me/can you see right through me’, these lines give me huge Sasha vibes, specifically. I think of them kind of especially applicable to the Reunion episode, but also just how there were a couple scenes where she seemed to be regretting hiding from her friends the toad rebellion that was going to take place in Newtopia, and that conversation Anne and Sasha have in The Third Temple. I don’t think she ever considered regretting the rebellion at all, but I do think she worried over what it might do to her friendships. 

The end of Reunion was heartbreaking, for both Anne and Sasha, because if the Plantars had been able to pull both girls up, I think there would have been more opportunity for Sasha and Anne to have a better reconciliation. (i think this about this a lot ngl) And, also because she was willing to die for Anne??? I don’t think that gets discussed enough. That episode has big ‘who could ever leave me’ at the beginning, and then at the end ‘who could stay’ vibes. 

For Marcy:

    And all of my heroes die alone (OOF)

As well as

     All the king’s horses, all the king’s men

     Couldn’t put me together again

     ‘Cause all of my enemies started out friends

Ahahaha this is the ANGST. So. I mean, obviously the king’s horses part makes me think of the ending of True Colors, and I don’t think that Marcy considers Sasha and Anne to be her enemies by any stretch of the imagination, but I don’t think that Andrias is above manipulating her to think that they think of her that way. (Also the line ‘cause all of my enemies started out friends’ line is very applicable to Anne and Sasha as well, it just happened to be part of the lines that made me think of Marcy) Plus sticking around the king and whatever the heck he has in store for her will definitely not put her back together sooo-

The ‘help me hold onto you’ and the ‘I’ve been the archer/I’ve been the prey’ just apply to all of them (for the former, think Sasha and Anne in Reunion, the way Marcy tried to mediate in The Dinner, and just True Colors in general; for the latter, it makes me think of the sword-fights between Anne and Sasha, as well as how Marcy once believed that Andrias actually cared about her). The ‘Dark side, I search for your dark side/But what if I’m alright, right, right, right here’ make me think of how Anne is going to be reevaluating her friendships with both Sasha and Marcy, as well as how all of them seemed to grow into the Amphibia communities that they landed in and what they are going to struggle with leaving behind.

I had this song on loop for way too long trying to word my feelings out about it.

~’Soldier, Poet, King’ (Oh Hellos)- This song is just so absolutely perfect for the three girls. I’d like to take the time to state that I think Sasha fits soldier, Marcy poet, and Anne king, but what are y’all’s thoughts? 

     There will come a soldier/Who carries a mighty sword

     He will tear your city down

Big Sasha vibes, fits with what’s she done so far in the show, as well as how she’s being set up for the third season to be a hero (whose intentions somewhat align with the consequences of her actions).

    There will come a poet/Whose weapon is his word

    He will slay you with his tongue

Marcy spends a lot of time journaling, and she even takes the time to learn a dead language! She seems rather skilled with more traditional weaponry, but her biggest boon is her intelligence and her quick-thinking. I also think that if she does end up getting possessed by the Night, its words being spoken by Marcy’s voice is absolutely going to SLAUGHTER Anne and Sasha.

     There will come a ruler/Whose brow is laid in thorn

     Smeared with oil like David’s boy

Apart from the fact that Anne literally has plants growing from her head in the S2 finale, she is also a charismatic leader who has made connections all over Amphibia. She genuinely cares about the people around her, and takes the time to get to know them and spend time with them. Also, a lot of times, she is underestimated and seen as the David to her opponent’s Goliath- whether that be physically or in skillset.

~’Someone To You’ (The Banners)- No specific lyrics here, but the general vibe of the song. There is a sort of desperation that seems to permeate it, as though if the narrator isn’t someone to the person they are singing to, they will be nobody at all, and I think that is very much how all of the girls view their friendship, at least at first. 

Marcy gets the music box thing going because she doesn’t want to be alone; Sasha is desperate to have Anne, and she wants so much for both Anne and Marcy to look up to her as someone who is strong and present. I think for Anne, we kinda see this song in the speech she gives to Sprig in Best Fronds when she’s trying to get him to break the rules with her, but also in how she is open to reconciling with Sasha in The Dinner and giving her a second chance. Mainly, though, what I associate with Anne for this song are the scenes where she reunites with Marcy and Sasha for the first time. The spinning hug she gives Sasha, and how tightly she hugs Marcy with tears in her eyes- she really does love and care about these girls.

They all cling to this friendship so much, in different ways, both healthy and unhealthy, and I think this song really captures that.

~’Lost Girls’ (Lindsey Stirling)- This song is mostly instrumental, so again, no specific lyrics here, but there is a very deep, melancholic feel to this song. It gets kinda fast-paced at some points, and reminds me of the ending of True Colors, with Anne and Sasha and Marcy separated. There is so much space- literal and internal- between all of them now, and I think this song does a really great job of getting Those Feels across. They aren’t just lost to each other, they are also struggling with battles inside of themselves.

But the lyrics that are in this song, (lol I just said I wouldn’t mention them whoops) ‘Lost girls find a way’, are sung, the music played after them that plays remind me that, like Matt Braly said, sometimes things have to be broken to be fixed again. They can find a way. It’s not a happy song to be sure, but there’s a quiet strength and determination in it.

~’Long Live’ (Taylor Swift)- I could cite specific lyrics here, but this song has just always given me epilogue-end-of-the-battle scenes, where we get to see everyone exhausted, but happy and most importantly together. This song is what I’m hoping the future gets to be for Marcy, Anne, and Sasha; happy about their present together, being able to heal despite the past, and accepting that even if they aren’t together forever in the future, that doesn’t mean they weren’t important to one another.

~’Torches’ (Oh Hellos)- ‘Torches’, on the complete opposite hand to ‘Long Live’, kind of represents where the girls are right now with one another. 

Despite keeping that old wheel turning, despite laying that next spoke down (yes these are direct lyric references), they are also continuing to make mistakes with one another.

    I got a venom like a snake running out of my mouth

    (Running out of my mouth, running out of my mouth)

    It’s got you burning at the stake

    Innocent or not, you’re not a bet I care to take

 And, yet, somehow, they keep being led back to one another. They are more alike than they think, and even if they get back to Earth, they will still be bound by the mutual experiences they had on Amphibia, that no one else is likely to ever understand. The ways they misunderstand one another and don’t communicate cleave them apart, but also together, in a way. 

    And Father Ignorance will make brothers of us all

   (Brothers of us all, brothers of us all)

    As he sets our torch aflame

    Chasing down the flimsy specters that we pro-create

As well as 

    Mother Fortuna, O, she makes sisters of us all

    (Sisters of us all, sisters of us all)

   When the faces in her wake

    Look more like our own than the effigies that we immolate

~’Castle On The Hill’ (Ed Sheeran)- Purely just the vibes. Nothing super deep, just makes me think of how Anne, Sasha, and Marcy are going to look back on their friendships and their time together. 

~’Trouble’ (Valerie Broussard)- Though I will forever associate this song with Six of Crows thanks to a fabulous animatic, I will say that it also makes me think of the darker tone that Season 3 might take on, and how each girl is poised to take on a different problem. I see it as a very Sasha song (especially ‘I’m your Number Two man in a fight/We are revolutionaries tonight’), but all three of them tend to lead a trail of chaos in their wake. (Also the vibes here are impeccable)

~’Time Alive’ (K.C Katalbas)- (not on Spotify, definitely recommend checking it out) This song just has that perfectly nostalgic, yet aspirational feel to it. It is hopeful, yet it it has its own sort of weight. It pairs nicely with ‘Long Live’ and ‘Castle On The Hill’, in a way, I think. It makes me think of what the future could be for the girls, once again, and how even if something is bittersweet, you are still allowed to be hopeful. Mostly, it makes me think of each girl reflecting about one another, and the time they spent together. 

    And this is your life, every plan has a right to fall

    And this is your heart, through the dark it’s the loudest call

    And this is breathing

    And seeing her go

~’Try’ (The Lightning Thief)- True Color battle against Andrias vibes! And Season 3 vibes! A lot of these lyrics are kind of specific to Annabeth, Percy, and Grover’s characters, but I also think the general feel of this song is very applicable to Anne, Sasha, and Marcy. Particularly, I am reminded of how Sasha and Anne will be feeling about Marcy.

    I may fail you

   I may fail you

    I may fail you, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t try

And

    I’m not leaving your side til we find what matters

   I’m not leaving your side til we’re back home

   I’m not leaving your side til you’re remembered

   No matter how far we have to go

As well as probably the guilt that Marcy was feeling during True Colors:

   Two thousand four hundred forty eight reasons I have to come along

   Wash my hands of past mistakes

As well as

    The weight of the world’s on my shoulders

    Like Atlas, it’s crushing me down

    We’re not brave, we’re not strong, we’re not soldiers

And how could I forget?

    L.A doesn’t seem so far away…

~’Drive It Like You Stole It’ (Sing Street)- Again, like ‘Trouble’, but a little softer. If ‘Trouble’ has Sasha vibes, this one makes me think of Anne, but it also has a similar line to ‘Time Alive’- this is your life. For the most part of Amphibia, I think the girls focussed a lot on fitting in and adapting to their surroundings, but I think Season 3 is really going to see them owning who they are and taking it upon themselves to enact change. 

It also just makes me think of them messing around and being kids, trying to figure out who they are. It’s like, if they ever make it back to Earth in one piece and stay friends, but still manage to get into shenanigans.

~’What’s Up Danger’ (Blackway, Black Caviar)- local newt king gets mauled by three newly empowered thirteen-year olds

~’How Far We’ve Come’ (Matchbox Twenty)- This one is a classic. No playlist of mine is worth its salt if it doesn’t have this song here. It has the ~vibes~ of pre-last battle energy, and also I can definitely see Sasha and the Sharps playing it at some point. 

Alternately, this also makes me think of Anne, Sasha, and Marcy finally going home together or reuniting properly after the end of True Colors. Lots of angst either way.

~’We Are Young’ (fun.)- What I picture with this: Anne, Sasha, and Marcy are not entirely reconciled with one another yet, but it’s the night before the last battle or somethin’, and they still care about one another a lot. This has that energy. They’re just kids, but they’ll be damned if they don’t go out without a fight, and without standing by one another’s sides. 

(and marcy found someone(s) to carry her home nanananananana)

Slightly more uplifting(?) than ‘How Far We’ve Come’, but similar energy, I think.

~’Pump It’ (Black Eyed Peas)- three local teenagers get pumped to cause problems on purpose; montage time. I have no justification for this song, only that it has the vibes of Sasha and Anne’s relentless energy and the confidence of Marcy swinging down on a rope she doesn’t know will actually hold her weight. 

~’Disaster Hearts’ (I Fight Dragons)- I feel like this song is the definition of Matt’s tweet about how some things have to be broken to be fixed. It has vibes of the aftermath of a battle, and opening the door to reconciliation and forgiveness. Amphibia has tied these girls together, for better or worse, and I think there is room for them to become better friends and mend their relationships.

    Disaster has a way of remaking our hearts

    Long after all the thunder and scars

    Days pass and bit by bit we begin to restart

    Our disaster hearts

~’Thus Always To Tyrants’ (Oh Hellos)- It makes me think of where Anne and Sasha are left at the end of Reunion, but also in how Anne wants to find Marcy now that she know she’s definitely out there. The sound of the song gives me huge Marcy vibes, with how it does seem to be almost cheerful? The very last line makes me think a lot about Sasha (‘Learn to love without consuming’), but I think a lot of the song is applicable to all the girls in different situations. 

[just-call-me-the-intrusive-thot]

Soulmate September - Day 10

Day 10 - You are born with a birthmark, similar to a tattoo, that is shared by your soulmate.

Pairing(s): Romantic Anaroceit, Romantic RemSleep, Ambiguous Poly Glasses Gays 

TWs: Swearing, Remus being Remus, animal death metions briefly, implied sexual mention once I think? 

–

Why was it so difficult to simply bring together two handsome, obnoxious soulmates?

How could grown men be this dense?!Virgil had been trying for MONTHS at this point to get these idiots to date, yet for some reason 

Instead of wanting to date each other, they both seemed far more interested in someone else.

In him.

Why, why did this have to be his life? Tormented by such stupid, handsome men?

Okay, maybe he had a teeny crush on both of them but Virgil was getting ahead of himself.

Working at the local theatre was doing some real good for Virgil; being a techie meant he was mostly out of the spotlight - so no chance of any performance anxiety - and it meant he had to actually wake up and be a functional human being but was flexible enough that he could call in sick pretty easily if he needed a mental health day. 

Thankfully, things had been going well until Virgil looked down from the catwalk to note that the two best actors in their troupe, Roman Prince and Janus D. Lyre, both bore each other’s soulmate markings. Both on the backs of their necks, all too easy to miss. Ever since, Virgil had been trying to subtly get them to realise they were soulmates. Of course, given the intimacy of the soulmate marks, it would be entirely outrageous for Virgil to simply tell them they were soulmates; social etiquette wasn’t his forte, but his anxiety really didn’t want the possible shunning he might receive if he broke that rule. Knowing that Janus and Roman were often together for rehearsals and were similarly self-obsessed, Virgil assumed getting them interested in each other would be a piece of cake.

And yet. Somehow. The man they were both interested in was Virgil himself.

Every time he tried to get the two talking, Virgil wound up being flirted with or found himself stuck between two arguing idiots. If anything, Virgil wondered if his interfering had made things worse. Now instead of kidding and being perfect and gorgeous together, they were absolutely straight up enemies. Janus did his best to interrupt - and one-up - Roman’s stellar attempts at flirting, and Roman often tried to out shine Janus by giving Virgil anything from his favourite chocolates to gothic black roses to new headphones.

Not that Virgil didn’t secretly love being the object of their mutual affection, if anything it gave him hope that perhaps whoever his soulmate was would dote on him just as much. But just like his non-existent soulmate mark, this just wasn’t meant to be. He still wasn’t sure why he didn’t have a soulmate mark like everyone else; even his ace and aro friends confirmed they had soulmates too, so why was he skipped over? Probably because no one would ever want to be his soulmate.Yeah. Probably.

Virgil was lost in that downward spiral when Remus leapt off of the set he was painting and landed just shy of crushing the poor emo.

“Wow you look like shit,”, the trash rat greeted, sitting and slinging an arm around Virgil before he could protest, “Are the girls fighting again?”

Virgil tried to stifle a snicker. It’s a stupid meme reference, Virgil, don’t laugh.

“Of course it fucking is, when is it not?“

Remus nodded, though he looked more bored than sympathetic, “Well, how about I offer you some advice, my good bitch?”

Virgil squinted at him in both annoyance and suspicion. “If it’s going to get me arrested, it’s a solid ‘fuck no’.”

“Relax, asshole, it’s totally legal and requires zero body bags and or falsified witness statements!”

Well. That’s about as good as they’re going to get. Virgil huffed, “Fine, give me the deets, Ratman.”

Remus snickered at the old nickname; A decade had passed but still the memory of the two of them graffitiing their high school gym with their tags on their last day still lived on.

“Alright, Stitch Bitch, here’s how you do it,”, Remus ignored Virgil’s eye roll and continued, “Ask them both on a date, same place and time. Talk about your interests, since you’re probably not gonna actually have that much in common, then you can just reject both of them! They’ll be driven into each other’s arms, or some shit. You know what they’re like, they’re dramatic as fuck. It’ll be perfect.”

Virgil wasn’t amused, “But what if they don’t? What if I just end up breaking both their hearts and they wind up all depressed and-?!”

“Then it solves your problem anyway, dipshit.”, he rolled his eyes, “Jeez, you’re worse than Roman with the dramatics! Think of the middle ground, you turn them both down, they go home sulking, but they’re big boys! They’ll get over it and get together some other day! Big deal!” Remus affectionately ruffled Virgil’s hair and didn’t stop until Virgil all but threw him off, “Alright, alright, fine! I’ll try, but if it all goes wrong, you’re helping me pack to move across the fucking globe.” “Ooh, alright! Or I can hide your body if it goes REALLY badly! I know how to make sure the police never find it, after all! Did you know you just need to bury it vertically and put a dead animal on top-”

Virgil tuned him out, already trying to narrow down locations for dates in his head. He’d need to pick somewhere both Roman and Janus would agree to go. He didn’t exactly doubt either of them would turn him down, but he needed to be sure they’d both attend. Perhaps the local restaurants would be a good place to start? It’d be easy to Mrs.Doubtfire that shit. Minus the clothing change, of course. Maybe the Golden Palace might be a good idea? It’s bougie enough for Roman, classy enough for Janus, and if Virgil got lucky enough, perhaps they’d both be the ones to pay for dinner.

“...And so I told Roman about it and then Roman tells me “Remus, you dunce, you got arrested because you were caught carrying a dangerous weapon in Starbucks” but I personally think that cop was just an asshole. I mean, it was just a baseball bat for fuck’s sake, so WHAT if it had a few nails in it-”

The techie noted that Remus was still babbling to himself so he clicked his fingers just shy or flicking him in the ear,

“When’s Roman free? I know Janus is pretty flexible-”

“I’ll bet.”, Remus snickered. “Dude. You have your soulmate, don’t be a dick.”

“Hey, that doesn’t mean I can’t mentally rank every guy here on how bendy I think they’d be in bed-”

“THAT ASIDE.”, Virgil interrupted, rubbing his temples like it would squeeze out the horrible mental image and several questions he never wanted answers to, “I’ve nailed down the where, I just need the when. Janus is free most days, but Roman’s pretty enigmatic about that shit. Do you know if he’s free tonight? Might as well get this shit over with.”

Remus mulled it over, “He should be. But you should probably just ask him first then Janus. Y’know, save yourself the trouble.”

Ah. That did make sense. Virgil tried not to let it show that he hadn’t thought of that and nodded, “Right… Okay. Just, if I fuck up talking to either of them, be ready.”

“With the car or a shovel?”

“Both.”

The trashrat snickered and let Virgil stand up, giving him an ‘affectionate’ jab in the back of his knee just to get a reaction out of the techie. Virgil wasn’t sure why Remus did that sometimes, he figured it was just another one of the demented twin’s eccentricities.

Inhaling deeply, Virgil sought out Roman, careful to avoid Janus’ line of sight as he tapped the flamboyant twin on the arm. Roman spun to face him, his expression lighting up in a way that made Virgil shamefully wish that he was his soulmate. That he was worthy of all his doting.

“Virge! What can I do for you, my dark and stormy knight?”

Stop being so fucking charming perhaps?

“Uh, it’s kind of an embarrassing request, so bear with me.”

“Of course! What’s up?”

Just ask him, ignore the butterflies, he’s not your soulmate.

“I was wondering, if you’d want to go on a date with me tonight-”

Roman positively swept the emo off his feet, his beaming smile could have burned itself into Virgil’s eyes.

“YES!! YES, I’D ADORE-”

“YEP! Okay, that’s great!”, he shushed him, trying to keep things as quiet as possible, “Listen, I know you’re excited but I’m really anxious about this-”

“Nothing new there.”, Roman chuckled affectionately as he put Virgil down.

“Oh shut up,”, Virgil smirked, pushing down the sunny feeling that chuckle brought out, “Look, I’ll text you the details so can you just keep this between us? I don’t want anyone gossiping. Not that I’m ashamed of you or anything I just-”

Roman carefully halted his word vomit with a gentle caress of Virgil’s cheek, “It’s alright, I understand. After all, with such an honour, I’d do good not to betray the trust of my charming prince.”

Virgil flusteredly averted his gaze, “Hmph. What happened to your ‘dark and stormy knight’?”

“Well, if things go well, I’d hope to promote him.”

The wink Roman shot Virgil should be illegal, that thing could have killed him. The techie just gave him an attempt at an ‘oh fuck off’ smirk that came out more as a ‘fuck I have a crush’ shy smile.

No time to dwell on it, he had another stupidly handsome man to ask on a fake date. 

Virgil checked with the stagehands and made his way over to the backstage dressing room area, finding Janus sat on one of the makeup tables while their dramaturg was busy going over some directions for their next rehearsal. Upon looking up and noticing him, Janus smirked - another expression that should be outright banned for it’s lethality - and politely requested the dramaturg ‘bother him another time’. They did exactly that, leaving Virgil and Janus alone to talk,

“Virgil,”, Janus purred with a voice like sweet honey, “what brings you here?”

Don’t think about that sexy voice, don’t think about that sexy voice, don’t-

“You, actually.” Play it cool, Virge. Be suave and charming. “I wanted to ask you out on a date.”

Janus’ eyes widened slightly in surprise. Virgil felt pretty proud to have finally stunned the silver-tongued gent, though he knew it’d only be a fleeting victory. If anyone would out-smooth even the most flirty person alive, it would be Janus.

With a snake-like fluidity, Janus slunk off of the table and made his way over to Virgil; whereas Roman was only an inch or two taller than him, Janus had a whole six inches at least. Virgil found it semi-intimidating, but that just made the taller man more attractive if he was being honest. Janus softly ran a hand through Virgil’s purple-dyed hair, 

“That’s rather a bold request, Virgil. What brought this on, if I may ask? Not that I’m complaining..”

Virgil had to work extremely hard to resist the urge to nestle into the warmth of his palm. Not your soulmate! Stop it! “I uh, I figured I would take a risk for once. It’s alright if you don’t wanna-”

“No.”, Janus interjected, the hand in Virgil’s hair sliding under his chin to lock their eyes, “I’d very much like to go on a date with you. When and where?”

Virgil swallowed nervously, “The Golden Palace, tonight? I’ll um, I’ll book the table and text you the time-”

“Perfect.”, Janus smirked, gently releasing Virgil. He hadn’t realised how much he’d been subconsciously leaning into Janus’ touch until he almost felt himself sway. “I’ll be sure to wear my best suit for you. Really give you something to blush over.”

Shit.

Virgil had no rebuttal, he simply nodded and hastily headed back to his usual breakspot to work out just how he would survive tonight…

--

It turned out the answer was simple; he wouldn’t.

Thankfully Virgil had settled on an outfit that was just the right mix of fancy and casual; his black leather jacket hugged his shoulders which his dark purple button up sat under. He’d gone back and forward between his options for bottoms, but in the end, he preferred his black short pencil skirt and a pair of sheer black tights that matched his black ankle boots. It was a bold choice, but Virgil felt far more powerful in that combination. Like he could kick ass and get away with it.

Virgil needn’t have bothered, however, as the second he showed up at quarter to seven to meet Roman, any semblance of confidence in his ability to control the situation went right out the window. It should have been illegal to look that handsome. A white waistcoat and pants bearing gold trim, combined with a burgundy button up shirt with the sleeves rolled? How dare Roman look that beautiful-

Oh god, now he’s smiling at him from across the room. Too late to back out now. 

Swallowing nervously, Virgil returned the smile and headed over to the table he’d booked; far enough from the door for Roman to miss Janus arriving, and out of the way enough so that they wouldn’t see each other too soon. If he wasn’t so nervous, Virgil would have pat himself on the back for the trouble he went to securing two tables over the phone, but the last thing he wanted to focus on was the person on the phone’s sassy remarks as he did so. Instead, he focused on Roman politely getting up to pull out his chair for him.

“You look stunning, Virge! Did you change up your eye shadow too?”

Virgil gave an anxious nod, “Yeah, I thought maybe I’d try the purple instead of solid black like usual. Do you like it?”

Roman’s grin could’ve smothered him in the night and he’d have thanked it for the priveledge, “I love it!”

While keeping an eye on the time, Virgil let himself roll into conversation with Roman; he was surprised by not only how smoothly the conversation went, but how much they had in common. Sure, there was a tiiiiny heated exchange as to which Disney movie reigned supreme, but their mutual love of Nightmare Before Christmas and the artistic pursuits made for some wonderful discussion. It was a shame Virgil had to remind himself of just why he was doing this. 

He was supposed to be making his rejection of Roman easier, not more difficult.

Finally, as 8 O’clock rolled around, Janus walked in followed by a few other smartly dressed patrons. Of course, Janus very much stood out among them wearing a black dinner suit with an obsidian waist coat and golden coloured button up underneath. His usual bowler hat had been replaced for a much fancier one with a larger brim that held a marigold flower. The sight was so enticing, Virgil had to will himself to stop staring as he got up from the table,

“Excuse me, Roman, mind if I go use the bathroom?”

Roman gave a nod and Virgil made haste towards the restroom area; thankfully he’d planned ahead and knew he could use the corridor that went along behind the bar to emerge on the other side of the room without being detected. However, a new obstacle proved to be a challenge; Janus hadn’t taken his eyes off of the door since the moment he’d walked in and removed his suit jacket. 

Damn. Virgil hadn’t anticipated that. 

Luckily, one of the men who’d come in behind Janus - a man adorned in an off-black suit wearing a beanie, a pair of sunglasses, and a face mask - had just come out of the bathroom door behind him. Without the time to let his social anxiety kick in, Virgil stopped the man and asked quietly, “Hey, sorry to be a bother, but if you can distract the handsome guy at that table for a couple  minutes,“, he began, gesturing to Janus, “I’ll give you ten bucks, how’s that sound?”.

The man seemed to stare for a moment behind the shades then silently gestured with his hands in a motion of “more”.

Of course.

“Okay, uh, fifteen?”

More again. This asshole..

“Ugh, fine, twenty! That's as much as I can spare!”

The man shrugged and nodded, gladly taking the money and, to his credit, doing exactly as was asked. Virgil watched him approach Janus, asking for the time if the way Janus took his attention and turned it to his watch was an indication. It bought Virgil enough time to ‘arrive’ just as the man gave a thank you nod to Janus.

“Sorry I’m a little late,”, Virgil apologised, taking his seat, “I hope I didn’t keep you waiting?”

 “Not at all,”, Janus assured him, smirking delightedly in a way that made Virgil’s knees feel weak even in a sitting position, “You look beautiful, Virgil, if I’d known you’d look so good, I’d have picked out an even better suit.”

This fucking guy, oh my god. “Oh shut up, you look handsome as is.”, Virgil shot back, doing his best to remain calm even as Janus leant in close to strike up conversation.

--

“I’m telling you, babes, he’s either a cheater or he’s crazy.”

Remy aimed the stirrer he’d been using to push back his cuticles towards Virgil and Janus, then trained it on his stoic co worker, “Look, he’s got two gorgeous guys here and neither of them have noticed yet.”

The aforementioned co worker rolled his eyes, “Remy, you have once again utterly misread the situation for the sake of needless dramatics. It’s rather obvious what’s going on here if you take the time to pick up on subtle body language clues.”

“What’s this about clues, Logie Bear?”, questioned a rather eager waiter carrying a tray of glasses back behind the bar. “Are you playing Sherlock again?”

“Patton, please, refrain from the pet names during working hours, I’ve told you before-”

“While they’re perfectly suitable and welcome at home, we must remain professional at work.”, chimed in another bespectacled man who was manning the till, “It’s fine Logan, honey, let them off the hook this once, okay?”

Patton put down the tray and wrapped their arms around the man who’d just spoken, “Emile’s right! C’mon Logan, you can’t deny it, you like the name too-”

Logan cleared his throat to throw off the peachy blush that threatened to give away his adoration for his soulmates, ”As I was saying before, it’s obvious as to what this rather anxious individual is up to. His body language isn’t that of a cheater, Remy,”, the server flipped Logan the bird, “In fact, I’d hazard a guess that the poor lad is simply attempting to work out which man is his soulmate. I read a fascinating journal that talked all about this phenomenon where some soulmates are unable to see their soulmarks and thus rely on a technique comparable to sensing one’s aura-”

“Okay so like, you think he’s trying to get a read on these two to narrow it down?”, Remy interrupted before Logan could further explore his tangent, “Well then, it’s obvious which one he’s gonna pick.”

Remy gestured lazily over his shoulder at Roman, who was currently twirling his fork between his fingers, “It’s gonna be Tall, Dark and Dumbass over there, babes.”

Logan scoffed, “Falsehood. Clearly the gentleman he’s sat with currently is a much more appropriate option.”. The server nodded his head in their direction, “All factors point to the man in black not only being the more suitable option, but his body language is far more open and receptive to our subject.”

“Subject. Christ it’s like I’m back in science one.”, Remy groaned, but continued to argue, “Besides, you’re ignoring how he’s like, totes more comfortable with my boy in white, sweetie. Look at him, he can’t wait to get away from your boy in black.“

Sure enough, Virgil had gone to switch partners again, returning to Roman with a sweetly shy apologetic gesture.

Patton piped up, “What if they’re like us, Logie Bear? Y’know, more than one soulmate?”

Logan shook his head, “Ridiculous, it’d make no sense to have such a date if that were the case.”

Remy nodded in agreement for the first time, “Yeah, either way, you’re wrong on this one, Logan. Trust me, I know what a fellow morosexual looks like.”

Emile and Logan both sighed at that one while Patton tsk’d, “Remy, come on, thats your soulmate you’re talking about! You shouldn’t be mean!”

Remy quirked an eyebrow at Patton, “Babes, have you met Remus? I love the big sap but he’s a certified dumbass with a heaping dose of cryptid.”, he opened the drinks cooler and took out a lemonade bottle, not giving a shit that the three soulmates behind him were absolutely unamused. ”Anyway, if you’re so sure over who our ‘subject’ will end up with, how about we bet on it? Loser has to work two weeks of overtime and the winner gets thirty dollars or some shit. You in?”

Patton and Emile both declined, both more focused on their work and simply enjoying the dates being had, while Logan agreed wholeheartedly, “I do hope your next two weeks are free, Remy...”

--

He couldn’t take much more of this.

The longer Virgil kept going back and forth between the two of them - using his anxiety to buy himself time without too much suspicion - the more he was getting tangled up in feelings he knew he couldn’t indulge. Every second with Roman made him smile, even when trading verbal jabs. Every second with Janus made him feel more bold, able to flirt back every once and a while. But this wasn’t right. Janus, Roman, they were made for each other. Not for him.

He wouldn’t get to curl up next to Roman on a cold night, watching Disney movies, baking together, or following along to Bob Ross tutorials only for one of them inevitably would start painting on the other until they were both paint splattered, cackling messes. 

He wouldn’t get to dance quietly in the living room with Janus while their favourite music plays, swaying softly to his favourite Jazz music, or lazily draping himself over Janus’ lap while they read their favourite books long into the night.

Virgil stared into the bathroom mirror; his ‘dates’ had been so sweet as to compliment him, but all he could focus on was how much of a mess he felt. He’s going to break their hearts beyond repair, all because he couldn’t just tell them they were soulmates. Social etiquette be damned, why had he let it go on like this?

Feeling his chest constricting, Virgil quickly grabbed his phone and texted Remus.

V: [help. Having a panic attack. Distract me]

He tried to remember his breathing exercises, chewing his free hand’s thumbnail anxiously until he got the text notification;

R: [Cool. Did u  kno rabbits eat their babies when they’re stressed?]

…. Virgil heavily regretted asking Remus to distract him.

V: [Horrifying. Thank you.]

R: [Anytime, Stitch Bitch. Now what happened?]

V: [Dates backfired.]

R: [U caught feelings didnt u]

Virgil groaned and kept typing.

V: [fuck u]

R: [fuck me urself coward.]

Well at least that got a laugh out of him. Remus followed up that text before he could reply:

R: [Just go out there and tell them the truth]

V: [nope, no way, they’ll hate me]

R: [Bitch they’re both smitten w/ u it’ll hurt but they’ll live, they’re sat there worried about u]

V: [how the fuck do you know that?]

R: [Remy’s on shift tonight, he and Logan are taking bets on how things will pan out. They’ve been texting me non stop.]

That did explain a few things. Namely the one server with the sunglasses and sassy attitude who gave him and Roman extra desserts “for like, the cutest couple in this bitch”, and the other more stoic server who brought him and Janus a bottle of champagne “to celebrate a wonderful partnership”. When would his life stop feeling like a goddamn circus?

Virgil was pulled from his thoughts as his next text sent his blood running cold,

R: [u might wanna get back to em, they’ll be worried about u by now]

Dammit. Virgil had just left the bathroom to be met with a worried Roman, “Virgil, are you alright!? You were gone so long, I thought something had happened!”

Stomp down that affection you’re feeling, Virgil. It’s just gonna hurt more.

“I’m fine, its just my nerves-”

“Virgil?”

Both men turned to spy Janus entering the hallway with an expression of shock and disgust upon seeing the two of them. He promptly strode over and with surprising gentleness moved Virgil to his side,

“It’s bad enough I can’t avoid you at work, Prince, but I’ll not have you ruining our date night.”

As Janus went to lead Virgil away, Roman held onto Virgil’s hand, “Actually, Lies and Dolls, he’s with me tonight, so kindly take your delusions and leave.”

Oh my god, why did he trust Remus’ plan in the first place?! Janus smirked dangerously, “Or what, you dramatic hack?”

Roman took exception to that, and while Janus had the height advantage, Roman still knew how to be intimidating when needed, “I’ll make you leave!”

Before either of them could come to blows, Virgil got in between them. He might as well come clean,

“BOTH OF YOU STOP!”

Janus and Roman faced him, sporting stunned but ever attentive expressions. Ugh, this was gonna hurt.

“I can’t do this anymore! Yeah, I did ask you both here, and yeah! You’re both wonderful but you’re not meant to be with me! You’re meant to be with each other! Ugh, this was a mistake! I can’t-! I can’t be here, I’m sorry-!”

Virgil wrenched himself from between them, making a beeline through the tables and just getting out of the door before the two caught up to him. In the back of his mind, Virgil assumed the serving staff that followed behind were either desperate to see this unfold or just making sure this wasn’t going to be a dine ‘n’ dash scenario.

“Virge, come on, you’re not making any sense! I’m not meant to be with Janus,”, Roman assured him, rolling his left sleeve up the whole way and revealing Virgil’s soul mark, “I’m meant to be with you! You’re my soulmate, Virgil! Surely you knew-”

“That’s,”, Janus interrupted, “That’s not possible, because Virgil is my soulmate.”

Both Roman and Virgil turned to face him, watching Janus roll up his right sleeve to reveal Virgil’s soul mark in the exact same place as Roman’s had been. 

To say Virgil was confused was an understatement, “W...Wait, no, that’s...”

Roman and Janus stared at each other’s soul mark then looked to Virgil, “You… really didn’t know that I- that we were your soulmates?”

Virgil shook his head, ”I don’t have your soulmarks though! It doesn’t make sense...”

He turned away, grasping his arms as he tried to make sense of all this. All his life, Virgil had looked in his mirror and wished - God, how he’d wished - to find just one mark. Something to prove that he was indeed someone’s soulmate. That the universe hadn’t forsaken him. And now he had two of the most wonderful men he’d ever met sporting his soul mark while he had nothing to reassure him this wasn’t some cosmic fluke?!

Janus and Roman stood in awkward silence, the latter giving the servers an apologetic look and pulling out his wallet to pay when the former noticed something about Virgil that had him squinting to get a look. “.... Virgil, do forgive me for this.”

Without hesitating, Janus whipped out his pocket knife - why he brought it on a date, Virgil had no idea - and cut a hole in the back of Virgil’s tights, careful to avoid his skin.

“What the FUCK, Janus!?”, came the obviously horrified reply, only for Janus to take a picture with his phone and hand it to Virgil, rendering him speechless.

Sure enough, there on the inside of his right knee joint was Janus’ soul mark. 

“I just happened to spot the same shade of yellow showing through and, well….”

He didn’t need to finish, Virgil was stunned to silence. All this time, how could he have missed it!? 

Well, it wasn’t in the easiest to see area, and come to think of it, his mirror was a little too high off the ground for that kind of angle, and with the marks being so small..…..

The revelation was met with a shocked gasp from Roman.

“... Virgil, may I-”

“I’ll just take them off, fucking hell!”

Both men turned away to let Virgil remove his shoes and tights in peace. When he gave them the all clear, Roman was ecstatic to note his own soul mark adorning the left knee joint. Virgil glanced towards his two soulmates, letting out a soft sigh of adoration at their delighted faces. He was feeling a whole rush of emotions, but right now? The last thing he wanted was to waste any more time.

“Gimme a second to pay these guys,”, Virgil gestured to the gaggle of servers set in various expressions of celebratory delight, “Then we can go back to my place and have a movie night.”

Roman and Janus offered sweet smiles to their soulmate; that sounded like the perfect end to a wild night.

---- Bonus (Because I got attached to this universe, fight me) ----

With the cafe clearing out aside a few stragglers, Remy sighed distantly, “Well, it’s a good thing we both won, babes, I didn’t wanna get stuck with all that overtime.”

Logan gave him a perplexed look, “Actually, we both lost, therefore we both should work overtime.”

Remy pulled down his shades to glare at Logan, “.... Are you fucking kidding me? Bitch, we WON, and we get to keep our money, babes. What part of that makes you think “nope, overtime sounds better”!?”

Logan was about to go into the technicalities when he chanced a glance back at his soulmates, watching as Patton excitedly gushed over the night’s events, stimming excitedly with their apron while Emile folded his own and put it away for the night, glad to listen to Patton’s bubbly rambling. Logan couldn’t deny, the idea of staying late while his soulmates were home without him wasn’t an appealing idea. Maybe this once he’d spare Remy a lecture.

“.... You know what, you’re right. Excuse me.”

With that, Logan went to join his soulmates while Remy stifled a fond smirk and went to go ask the last patron to leave. He wanted to just go home and collapse into Remus’ arms. Ugh, he just hoped this dude wasn’t going to make a fuss. He wasn’t sure what kind of guy combined a suit, a beanie, shades, AND a face mask, but Remy just hoped he wasn’t here to rob the place.

“Alright sweetie, you gotta go. We’re closing and I wanna get home to my loveable dumbass. Let’s go-”

The man gestured to his ear. Ah. Remy rolled his eyes and leant down to speak closer,

“I said-“

The man quickly pulled down his face mask and stole a peck from Remy, a grin spreading across his face that curled excitedly to match his moustache.

“You gotta get home to meeeee~.”

Remus took off the sunglasses and beanie, revelling in the surprise that painted itself over Remy’s face. He stood up, wrapping his arms around Remy’s waist as his soulmate tried to form a sentence, “How long have you just been sitting here?!”

“Ever since I figured it’d be funny to watch Virgil realise he was trying to set up his own soulmates-”

“You- Wait, Virgil!? That’s the guy you’re always telling me about?!”

“Yep!”, Remus grinned.

Remy wrapped his arms around Remus’ neck, unsure if he wanted to strangle him or hold him closer, “...Did you know he-”

“Had two soulmates? Yep~!”

Remus chuckled and kissed Remy’s cheek, “Virge and I used to have gym together. He kept saying he couldn’t find his soulmarks, I’m surprised he never got my hints...”

Sighing annoyedly at his soulmate, Remy pulled him in for a proper kiss before he could go on more of a tangent. Once they broke apart, Remy poked Remus’ chest, 

“You made me lose thirty bucks, y’know.” 

Remus grinned harder and pulled out twenty dollars  “Well then, I better take this generous donation from my best friend and treat you to a milkshake on the way home then...”

-----

It’s finally doooone!!

This was a long one for sure, but sue me, I got super into this one!!

I’ll be playing catch up for a while so get ready for Day 11, I ended up with a last minute change and it’s gonna be a tear jerker. @tsshipmonth2020

Taglist: @somehow-i-got-an-account @cateye-glasses @fandomsofrandom

[colderthancoldest]

An Easy Alliance

Prompt: "You're here." "I'm here, just like I promised." & "I came back for you. I promised I would, and I did." (This Request)

Ao3 Link

Pairing: Dhawan!Master × Reader

Word Count: about 5k

Summary:  It's not easy to be a human with a Tardis. You have a doorway to any where and time in the universe- however, the catch is that the worlds on the other side are often treacherous and it feels like they're against you at every turn. You begin to wonder if it's worth it, if you even deserve this opportunity, when a stranger saves you from it- in more ways than one. Maybe you're worth more than you know.

Various Tags: First meeting, falling in love, fluff and angst, happy ending, my goal is that you will cry but laugh by the end, im ambitious like that, relationship is open to interpretation

Warning: Feelings of Depression, passive suicidal thoughts (It's not that dark, it's actually quite optimistic by the end, but I always add a warning for anyone sensitive to these topics. Please stay safe, thank you.)

Note: Please let me know what you think! I don't often write in this style so I really appreciate feedback! Enjoy :D

---

~

It's not easy to be a human with a Tardis.

It's a bit of a long story as to how you've obtained a Tardis of your own in the first place.

Essentially you found it, purely by accident. The ship had fled from the Time War and was left to rot when it's pilot was killed. Tardises are known to be temperamental, and humans are notoriously weak telepaths- but neither of you would get anywhere without each other.

In short, you struck up a deal. You take care of the Tardis, learn how to maintain her, and in return- she becomes your door to anywhere and any time in the universe.

It's difficult, seeing as the two of you can't communicate the way telepaths are able to talk to Tardises, but she- the Tardis insisted 'she'- was making do.

She translated the manual for you, provided you with food and clothes and shelter, and was patient as you slowly learned how to fix and fly her.

As if teaching yourself every inch of advanced and sentient technology wasn't difficult enough- you also found yourself deeply out of place in the far away lands the Tardis took you to.

You're human. You're mortal. You look, dress, and act in a way that's out of place in most non-human societies. Even humans from the distant future- as little as a mere few centuries ahead- barely recognize you.

You're clever and fast, but it's not always enough.

It's all too easy to offend people from cultures you've never met. Even if you do nothing wrong, it's your word against theirs.

If you had a nickel for every time you've nearly been killed by a misunderstanding... Suffice it to say, you could easily afford the tungsten wiring your Tardis is always quick-tempered about.

~

It's in one of these situations that you meet... him.

You're alone, as you always are, with cuffs scratching at your wrists.

The locals of a planet from the future have opted to skip the 'fair trial' bit and head directly to execution.

Of all the ways to go, you can't help but feel a bit... disappointed. A human with a Tardis, a person with a door to anywhere in the known universe, to any time that's ever existed- and this is how it ends.

You suppose you've already gotten more out of life than you could have hoped.

Maybe it's best to quit while you're ahead.

"Really? That's all?" a voice echoes about the large room you're being detained in.

You whip your head about in a feeble and failing attempt to pinpoint the source of the noise. Whoever it is sounds almost amused.

"Someone so quick, someone who's been so careful with the hand they've been dealt, and you're willing to give it all up- here and now?" the strange voice questions.

You spin your head around but there's nothing except shadows. You're set to die at noon and it's barely dawn.

"Who said anything about giving up?" you reply sharply.

You're scared, but that's no reason to show it. You grit your teeth and glare into the darkness around you. You can't pinpoint the figure meandering about in the dark.

"Why? You did, my dear," the voice replies, sounding pleasantly amused.

You squint in a failing attempt to make out the shape stepping into the pale moonlight.

"Me? You don't know a thing about me! I've never met you in my life!" you retort.

And you know this, because you've barely met anyone. You travel to see the sights, not to interfere. You visit worlds to satisfy your curiosity and nothing more. Whoever this is, you've certainly never told them who you are.

The stranger only chuckles faintly.

"I know all about you. A human with a Gallifreyan Tardis? I've been observing you ever since I first detected your ship on Earth.

Then again, it's not your ship- is it?"

Your eyes widen momentarily, but you're quick to force your racing heart back down your throat.

"What I do is none of your business," you defend yourself.

"And what I do is none of yours," the stranger replies in a passive song.

"However," they continue.

They step out from the dark and into the white streaks of moonlight sneaking in from the skylight in the ceiling.

They... look like a human man. A... quite well-kept and well-dressed human man.

A deep purple jacket over an eccentric checkered suit, perfect dark hair that curls at the ends like waves over his face, and dark but shining eyes to match.

You can tell in an instant that you've never met anyone like this before.

"Things have grown dull and you're the first exception to the rule I've seen in a very long time," he says in a tone that suggests this confession is somehow a compliment. "You're never after anything. You only observe."

He tilts his head.

"As much as I dislike humans, somehow- you're different."

He paces about you until you can't see him anymore because of the way the cuffs keep you pinned to the chair in the middle of the room.

You lose sight of him for a brief second.

You fear the worst but then...

The cuffs fall with a clink and your hands are suddenly free.

"For you and only you," he says as he paces back into your field of vision, "I propose an alliance."

"An alliance?" you echo flatly. It's a question, to get him to elaborate, but also a surprise.

All your time traveling, and no one's ever offered you such a thing before.

"Yes, dear," he says in a way that you would assume was patronizing if not for the polite tone of his voice, "an alliance. Your human mind is so loud, I've heard you wondering to yourself how to communicate with your ship, how to repair her, how to fly her. I can be beneficial in that field."

He sounds proud of himself.

You don't cave quickly. You aren't that naive.

You haven't made it through countless adventures- your feet pounding over the surfaces of countless planets, escaping all sorts of dangers- without being careful.

"And in return?" you ask cautiously. There has to be a catch somewhere.

"In return, you help me," he says warmly.

He looks you over with an amused smirk at his lips.

"You see, I have big plans for a certain enemy of mine. However, I don't have time to deal with the day-to-day nonsense of Earth. You help me with the little things and in return, whenever you need saving, I promise to be there."

He taps his chest with a prideful grin.

"I swear on my hearts."

You brush past him as you make your way for the door. You'd better get going before the guards return for your scheduled execution.

The sun is coming up, dying the sky a beautiful purple haze.

"You think that's something you can promise? All of time and space, and you expect me to believe that?" you scoff at his words, "You'll abandon me the moment it's convenient. No deal," you tell him.

He slips past you and reaches an arm across the doorframe to block your path. You cross your arms and glare at him.

To your surprise, he looks angry.

"I'll have you know I take great offence to that! I make good on my promises- unlike some people," he grumbles that last part to himself.

"If I say I won't abandon you, I won't abandon you. If I say I'll be back, I'll come back," he says sharply as he stares you down.

There's something in the way he locks his jaw, something in the way he takes offense to your distrust, something about the way he scrunches his nose and his brows- that make you realize he's telling the truth.

"I keep my word," he insists gravely. "Which is something- you'll find in this universe- not many people do. This arrangement is mutually beneficial. You won't be offered a better deal than this."

You exchange a glare with him for a long moment.

His gentle features are twisted up in anger, his eyes betray and old pain that you've dug up by offending him, his hand remains locked on the doorframe to block your path- and, for some reason, it makes you smile.

You huff a small breath.

"You haven't done this whole 'alliance proposition' thing before, have you?" you ask him.

He falters.

"I haven't had any need for it before," he reasons. "However, I'm currently on a bit of a schedule. I have a lot of dominos to set up before my best enemy arrives to topple them," he admits. His expression softens at the mention of this 'best enemy'.

You pat his shoulder and then pry his hand from the doorframe to pass him by.

He caves easily and follows you outside.

The dawn is breaking and you still need to get back to your ship.

"Alright," you decide with a small sigh.

You do need help with your Tardis and- more than anything- you certainly need someone to watch your back.

It's not every day some well dressed stranger saves you from your own curiosity. You feel obligated to return the favor- seeing as he did just save your life- so you decide you might as well make the most of it.

"What do you need me to do?" you ask, hopefully and yet still bracing for the worst.

Your newest ally grins.

~

He mostly wants information about Earth. He doesn't tell you why- and you don't ask.

It doesn't matter all that much to you anyway. With your Tardis, you've watched whole apocalypses pass you by. You've grown numb to it. In the end, it's always just a different verse of the same old worn-out song.

You're tired and nothing holds your interest for long anymore. Whatever he's planning, you doubt it'll have any effect on you. You might as well keep up your end of the deal.

Once you gather everything on the requested topic, he asks for information on a new one. He wants to know about Cybermen next. He wants to know about The Great Cyberwars- but only odd specifics from near the end that were left undocumented.

You begin to get the feeling that he needs to research their timeline for some reason, but he has an odd fear of them simultaneously. He doesn't want to get too close to the subject.

Again, you don't ask what it's for- and in return: you get more than you gave.

Your latest ally- he has yet to give you his name- plays translator for your Tardis. He explains bits of the manual you were stuck on and how the Tardis functions as a unit.

He's polite and- once you get past his gallows humor- he can be quite funny.

He explains how certain pieces of the Tardis controls have to be flipped in unison because Tardises are meant to have multiple pilots.

He's odd, he's blunt, and strangest of all: he's a very good cook.

He's the kind of person who always has a secret up their sleeve and he surprises you in all the best ways.

You... begin not to mind his company.

He always seems to know what you're about to say before you say it. You blame that part on his psychic abilities.

However, it's almost nice to be understood in that way. In an abstract, personal, understanding way you've never known before.

In response, he gauges that your words and actions are genuine. His ability to sense your unfiltered thoughts let him know that it's safe to open up to you in return, little by little.

Without even realizing the gradual change- he's suddenly a friend.

~

Now when you go out on adventures, when you're a lone mortal facing down the strange and terrifying perils of the universe, you're drastically less afraid.

Instead of passing through with your head down, you're able to stare up at the stars and admire then. You can safely look forwards rather than watching over your shoulder.

You're living instead of surviving.

It happened so gradually, you'd barely even noticed.

~

One day your Tardis lands in a heavily guarded patch of sacred land. It looks like the hillside near a heavily fortified church.

You're not fast enough to explain why you're there, and even if you were- the local authority won't let you. They're very strict people with very black and white thinking.

You're tied to a chair and tossed in the back corner of the guard outpost. So few people get this far past their defenses that the locals don't even have a proper prison to toss you in.

It's a long day indeed, awaiting whatever fate they have planned for you.

You're stuck in the box, alone, tied up in the dull silence. It's... annoying. Instead of wondering if perhaps you deserve it, you decide to escape.

At some point, the guard leaves you alone. You kick the chair around and reach for the scissors on the guard's desk with your hand pinned tight to the metal frame of the chair with rope.

You don't have a chance of escaping, the physics simply aren't there. And even if you get untied, you'll never make it far alive. Still, that doesn't mean you're not going to try. You're not going to let the universe- nor your own apathy and fear- get the best of you this time.

A different guard returns all too quickly. They're draped in the huge robes that the people who occupy this 'holy' land always wear. Of all the possible places to visit, you not only landed in the most heavily fortified part but also the most boring. It was basically just a monastery with a military guarding it.

You're not sure how you're going to reason yourself out of the fact that it very clearly looks like you're trying to escape.

You sharply kick at the guard's knee. It's all you can do. You're not sure if you can take them down, but it's worth a shot-

"Bloody- F- Gah- Do you mind?!"

You recoil visibly at the familiar voice.

"You?" You ask sharply.

The faux-guard pulls their hood down to reveal a familiar face. He looks quite annoyed.

"Actually, my acquaintances call me, O- but yes. It's me.

We made an agreement after all!" he hisses as if this all should be obvious to you.

"You're here," you observe, still quite shocked by the reveal.

He only rolls his eyes.

"Yes. I'm here, just like I promised. Do you really think so little of me?

I told you. When you need saving, I'll be there.

I keep my promises."

Without bothering to ask, he takes a seat on your lap. He sits sideways so the pressure doesn't pinch your thighs- which, all things considered- is quite polite of him.

He reaches down to his injured leg and rubs it with his hand for a moment. He appears to have a previous injury in that leg, and you very clearly haven't helped matters. Either way, once he's chalked up your assault to some bruising, he brushes the injury off.

"No, I'm just surprised," you tell him.

"You didn't think I would save you?" he asks, a little disappointed.

You press your lips together in a neutral expression. Whatever you think of saying, he already knows every word of it.

"I couldn't bet my life on it," you say simply.

He pulls a knife from his pocket and reaches around you to to saw through the tough rope.

"You tried to escape this time," he observes aloud.

You bite your tongue.

Yes, you did- didn't you?

It's interesting, the things you've begun to do ever since you gained someone to share your travels with. Someone who knows what it's like to do all of this. Someone who... knows what it's like to spend it alone, spending every day wondering if you're worth it.

He must hear your thoughts, as per usual, because he can't look you in the eye. He soon stands up again and leads you out.

He doesn't say another word as you return to your separate Tardises and leave.

~

Things get better from there and soon it's a pattern.

You have fun, on your own. You see the sights, you walk the streets, you eat the food. It's quiet, but it's nice not to have anyone else with you to color the world in any other way than it already is.

It's you and the world.

You and your flirts with danger.

You and narrowly escaping the authorities.

You and wondering directly into the jaws of the latest beast- only to be met with the familiar eyes of someone who is no longer a stranger.

"Again?" he asks.

Sometimes he plays dress up, sometimes he simply hypnoses the guards to let him through, but no matter the situation he's always dramatic about it.

Seeing him always brings a smile to your face. It's rare, but it's always familiar. Being 'saved' becomes more of an excuse than a necessity.

There's a learning curve to traveling the universe and before long, you've reached it's peak. You learn what to do, what to say, how to keep yourself safe.

You don't need him anymore, but you're more than willing to let him drop in to 'save' you anytime. It becomes a comfort, to know that even when you mess up, you're worth saving.

Sometimes you're in the middle of taunting a guard who hasn't even arrested you yet and when he shows up to hypnotize the problem away.

And sometimes, he suggests that he'd better stick around for a bit to make sure you stay safe.

And sometimes you recommend the pair of you get food together, and sometimes that meal turns into a walk through the park, and sometimes that walk turns into laying in fields of grass, staring up at the stars, exchanging ideas about the possibilities of this big old universe you find yourselves in.

And sometimes you wonder why this person, who's so kindhearted and protective, so warm and good-humored, keeps you at arms length.

There's something more about him, you suspect. There has to be.

You're willing to bet anything that it's something dark- but he never shows it.

He's different when it comes to you. You're not certain why.

Is it because you can't lie to him? Is it because you're honest with him? Is it because you don't ask, you don't press, you just let him be at your side whenever he chooses?

~

It hits you all at once one day that perhaps this arrangement has become more.

It stays true to its core, to be mutually beneficial and serve in favor both parties personal interests, but that's not all it is anymore.

Without realizing, it's suddenly two parties who mean a great deal to each other. Suddenly, you're choosing to help each other rather than acting in order to receive something in return.

You're not scared of danger anymore. You know how to get out of it now- and even if you can't, you know he'll be there.

You trust that he'll be there.

He's no longer contingency, he's normalcy.

You're never traveling alone because he's always there, in the back of your mind, as you wonder if he might join you should the opportunity arise.

Maybe you should voice this next time you see him.

~

When you run into him, you're offering information- per another strangely specific request- that you obtained from a library in the distant future that your ally may or may not be banned from.

You consider asking why he can't fetch it himself, but you don't. He either offers information or not. One of the rules is that neither of you ask about the others' personal business.

When you arrive at your typical meeting place, his own Tardis is a mess.

It looks... like a cluttered house inside.

The way it's decorated feels very unlike someone like him.

He immediately hugs you as you enter. That's how you know something's wrong.

You catch him rather than hug him. You suddenly feel too sick to remember any of the things you had wanted to tell him.

"What's wrong?" is all you ask softly.

He crumbles.

He remains as elegant and unyielding as always, but it's easy to feel that he's trembling. His breathing shakes and his fingers lock into the fabric of your coat.

It feels like a long time, ages, until he gets out a small sentence.

"I... have to go away for a while."

You're scared to know what that means.

"How long?" You ask tearfully.

"It depends," he breathes quietly.

"On what?"

"If my plan works."

There's a long silence as his words hang heavy in the air.

You don't know what to say.

The rule is that neither of you ask about the others' personal business.

You want to honor that rule but... the way he's acting... it scares you.

He clings to you, his fingers clawing desperately at your sleeves as he hangs his head down low, but he doesn't know what to say either.

Eventually... he decides on a sentence.

"Do you remember... when we first met?" he asks quietly.

You nod.

"How could I forget?" you chuckle warmly in a weak attempt to lighten the mood.

He smiles for a split second. It comes and goes in the blink of an eye. He shakes his head and his expression grows darker as if he's scolding himself for something.

He lets go of your clothes and turns away.

"You didn't bother trying to escape on your own. The whole universe at your fingertips and... you didn't know what to do with it.

I could hear your mind- I always can- and that day you... were about to give up fighting."

You look off to the side and let your eyes fall to the floor.

It's true. The whole universe ahead of you and you were nearly too tired to keep living in it.

You don't believe you deserved to find the Tardis anyways.

Who were you to have a doorway to the universe? Who were you to intrude where you didn't belong? You never belong anywhere anyways. That was why you left Earth in the first place.

There was never anywhere you fit. The only way you can justify your existence is by being useful, to the Tardis, and then to your new friend.

On your own... you're no one. Sometimes you wonder why you bother at all.

"What about it?" you ask coldly as you cross your arms.

You don't want to think about that anymore.

The two of you.... Helping each other gives you purpose. It gives you something to keep busy with.

You still felt the way you felt before you knew him sometimes, but you're improving. That has to be worth something.

He looks sad and broken.

You suddenly remember that he can hear every abstract hint of emotion racing through your mind.

"I feel that way too," he confesses.

His words hurt to hear.

He slowly wonders off through the room. There he goes. Keeping you at arms length again.

"It's been fun... but it isn't sustainable. My lifespan is far longer than yours. It's not worth... us hurting each other over something that can't last."

He shakes his head.

"All this time," he begins, "I've been working towards an end. I'm going to make a stand with my best enemy. I'm going to tell her everything I've learned.

I'm going to make it so that she doesn't have another choice.

I'm going to end something that should have never existed. For good."

He sounds determined all of a sudden. His last mission.

He turns to you abruptly.

"I'm telling you this because I won't be able to help you anymore," he says steadily.

You blink at the tears in your eyes.

Oh.

So...

That's what he means.

"I... understand," is all you can say.

There's a long moment of silence and then-

You rush over to hug him. He lifts you up until your toes can barely reach the ground. He holds you tight against him and spins you about as your tears splash onto the shoulder of his coat.

You want to beg him not to go, but you know he's been preparing for this. He's clearly made up his mind. There's nothing you can do to stop him.

And anyways.

He already knows what you're thinking.

"It'll be okay," he promises.

You want to believe him.

You can't.

~

It's quiet now.

Something about it all makes everything else feel quieter.

Everything feels... perhaps distant is the word you're actually looking for.

And you feel tired again. No, apathetic is what you're looking for. As if you can't bring yourself to care about the real world anymore.

You feel like you're back where you started.

You don't know what to do.

You have more than you deserve. You're smarter than you know what to do with. You're more than ever before and yet as powerless as always.

Or...

Maybe not.

You know more now. You can do more now.

You know what you're capable of when you aren't afraid and- as terrified as you are right now- you know what the right thing to do is.

It's time to put everything you've learned to good use. He’s saved your life after all- in far more ways than one. It’s time you return the favor.

~

"Doctor!" the Master shouts as the Doctor abandons him for the latest of countless times.

Why is he surprised anymore?

He should know by now that she always finds a loophole in his foolproof plans. That she always runs from danger. That she always leaves him in the end.

Now some idiot no-one cyberman-resistance soldier has pressed a button to detonate a planet-destroying bomb.

He'll be dead in seconds. Shattered into atoms and quirks and nothingness.

For as much as the Doctor leaves him, the Master simply can't bring himself to leave her. He can't stop chasing her.

Quite soon, he won't have a choice.

This is it. This is what finally pushes him over the edge.

If the Doctor can leave him for dead like this then... she isn't the person he thought she was anymore. He'll finally learn better. He'll finally give up on her.

It was a shame it was too late.

The particle is active.

He runs but... he isn't going to reach his Tardis in time.

He's alone.

~

And then suddenly he's not.

Suddenly he isn't in the crumbling Matrix room anymore. He isn't on Gallifrey at all.

He's standing, safe and sound, being held tight in someone's arms.

He comes to his senses slowly. The seconds don't feel real as they pass. He looks up to see that he's in your Tardis, in your arms, looking up at your face.

"You..." he breathes. He can barely feel reality around him.

"It just took a bit of fancy flying to swoop in, just a second in time, and save you," you smile at him.

He stares in disbelief.

"You came back for me," he says breathlessly.

"Of course I came back for you!" you chuckle. "It's like you're always saying. I promised I would, and I did."

"Saving you is my job!" he replies, still in shock.

"I had to return the favor sometime," you smile.

His face is still locked in an expression of disbelief. He's still processing this.

You decide to make it easier on him.

"How about this:" you suggest with a heavy heart, "we go back to saving each other. To adventures and pastimes and pretending this is nothing more than a profession partnership.

Most importantly, we both take it one day at a time.

And down the road, when we're done, once we've had all our fun, then we'll find out a way to go out in style.

Together."

He contemplates this for a moment.

"You won't be offered a better deal than this," you smirk. "You'd be smart to take it."

He shakes his head.

"No," he says firmly.

Your eyes widen.

"No?" You ask nervously.

The Master takes your hands in his own and laces your fingers together. He moves closer, his face inches from yours.

"No," he repeats. "I don't want to go back to how things were. I want a proper partnership.

You and me and the universe.

I don't know how I didn't see it before."

You laugh warmly as he presses his forehead to yours.

"I'll do it right this time," he promises. "I took care of what I needed to. No one will ever bother us now.

We can..."

His eyes darted about as he searched for the right words.

He held your hands tighter in his own.

"We can go back to saving each other- the universe be damned.

Every day.

For as long as you want," he promises wholeheartedly.

"Whenever you need saving, I'll be there."

Your heart is racing.

It's all you could ever want and more.

He is all you could ever want and more.

You don't need to agree out loud. He already knows. You voice it anyway.

"Okay," you grin.

~

In a strange way, you understand now.

You understand why he saved you.

You learned how to fly this Tardis. You learned how to save your friend from the clutches of death.

You are worth the life you've made for yourself and more.

You deserve to be happy- and you plan to be.

You don't know why you ever believed you didn't.

You have a doorway to anywhere. You have a hand to hold. You have a partner who would burn down every planet in the sky for you.

It's time to go out there and get in trouble and make mistakes. To fight the same old fight against every new day and always emerge triumphant.

And your partner is working on a new project. Something to do with regenerative healing using research he stole from the shambles of his old home.

With any luck, maybe the two of you can travel the universe forever.

~

[stargazer-balladeer]

Asking Out A Clueless Reader [Persona 5]

anon: can i ask for a college au! hcs of p5 thieves & mishima crushing on a ~clueless~ fem reader & maybe asking her out? fem reader even for the girl thieves please coz i like them too oop- 

Characters Included: Akira Kurusu, Ryuji Sakamoto, Ann Takamaki, Yusuke Kitagawa, Makito Niijima, Haru Okumura, Futaba Sakura, Goro Akechi & Yuuki Mishima

Note: Can I edit it a bit? I’m not so familiar with College AU that much (The College AU I’ve read so far contains NSFW), so Imma do it in Highschool setting (though the setting isn’t really mention here), if that’s alright with you. If you want, you can request again. :) Hope ya’ll enjoy this!

Reader’s Gender: Female

Warning: Spoiler warning!

Akira Kurusu

What attracted him to you is your personality at most, how innocent you were, how you never had any trouble communicating with him (even though he has a bad reputation), and how you stick up for yourself when you’re getting bullied. Those traits were just the beginning, and before Akira knew it, he’s already in love with you.

But the one thing he hated yet loved about you is how oblivious and clueless you are. Like you can’t pick up someone flirting with you unless someone told you about it, though you’ll still deny it stating they were just being nice.

This has an advantage and disadvantage at the same time.

Advantage because that means you weren’t interested in any boys and friendzone them immediately. Disadvantage, he gets friendzone as well.

Like the rest of the Phantom Thieves can tell their leader is already in love with you, and they tried helping him by making hints about it to your clueless self. Futaba practically screamed, “he’s in love with you!”. And you’ll be like, “Oh! I love him too! I also love all of you!” shots fire

But nevertheless, Akira never gave up. He persisted through your oblivious self by giving you your favorite flowers, favorite food and things you like. 

You, of course, thought he was just a caring friend (even though you wanted to believe he likes you just the same way you like him, but that’s just a secret).

I can see him taking his time in confessing to you, and when he does. You immediately friendzone him down. 

But he never gave up. He persisted that you two should go out, and you always thinking it’s a friendly hang-out. Akira’s actually, surprise surprise, on the verge of giving up, he actually doesn’t know what to do.

Even though you were clueless, you managed to notice his personality towards you shift. You thought, at first, it was something you did. But you realized (with the help of the Phantom Thieves) that Akira love you as much as you love him. 

This time, you were the one who confessed to him. To say he was shock was an understatement. He was overjoyed when you confessed to him your feelings, he literally grab you and hug you in pure joy. 

Ryuji Sakamoto

Ohh... boy.. here we go.

What attracted him to you is your willingness to support him, to befriend him and to take care of him, even though Kamoshida forbids everyone to talk to Ryuji. This poor bby admires your determination and willingness to break the rules just to take care of his body.

He has never admired you this much before, but now, he’s falling deeper in love with you.

His two friends, Ann and Akira, noticed his attraction to you so they endlessly teased him about it. The two of them even managed to pair you two up for a project, how they manage to do that, Ryuji doesn’t even want to know.

However, doing this said-project, is when he confessed his feelings to you. You. being clueless and oblivious, state you feel the same as him and hope you two continue being friends. OuCH--

Even though Ryuji wanted to give up, the now Phantom Thieves slap him back to his senses (Well.. Ann did the slapping). Now, Ryuji is more determined than ever.

Ryuji took Akira’s advice to take it slow, though Ryuji prefers a fast-pace since he’s impatient, he decided to do it. He waited patiently for you, giving you little trinkets he found and give you flowers he managed to steal from the flower shop.

How you still remain clueless is beyond him. Practically EVERYONE KNOWS HIS FEELINGS FOR YOU. ARE YOU THAT BLIND?! 

Anyway, for you to realize his feelings for you is one way, someone has to tell you and stick it through your thick skull. Which, in this case, is Ann. 

Ann might not seem like it but she deeply cares for Ryuji (AnnxRyuji fan here) and seeing him on the verge of giving up upsets her. So she confronted you. 

After this encounter with Ann, you immediately confessed to Ryuji the next day. How stupid you were, how you never realize you were hurting him so much, how you already love him as well.

Ryuji, at first was awestruck and speechless, like he’ll stand there, staring at you with mouth open. You need to say his name several times before he could snap out of his trance. He immediately screamed happily as he jumps around like a madman, screaming “I FINALLY GOT HER! WHOOO!”

You could only giggle at the sight.

Ann Takamaki

What attracted her to you is your willingness to stand up for what you believe is right and how you stood up for your friend. She was amazed when you started screaming at Kamoshida, who was about to hit your friend. She has grown to respect you, and soon came to love you even.

Of course she would subtle about this and try to act like everything was normal (alongside her bad acting skills). You and her immediately hit it off, much to her immense pleasure.

She found out your favorites and you two frequently hang out with each other. When she realized she likes you more of a friend, she panic. I mean, not everyone is accepting about LGBTQ+ community, hOW WAS SHE SUPPOSED TO TELL YOU THIS?!

Ann would DEFINITELY confined to Akira, Morgana and Ryuji about this, two of the people she could trust at the time being, alongside you. Morgana would probably be upset but he’ll eventually accept it. Both Akira and Ryuji said the same thing though, much to her displeasure, “be yourself”, “if you like her, go get her!” and “we’ll be here supporting you two.”

She knew they mean well, but that only makes her anxiety skyrocket. So she decided to just tell you directly. You, being your clueless self, thought she meant being your best friend, but she shot it down saying she wants to be your girlfriend, which made you blush.

Ann thought you were disgusted of her so she decided to walk away with a sad, teary face. You could only watch her as she walk away, like her, you were also conflicted. 

For the next few days, everyone could tell something was wrong with the two of you. They always see you two hanging out together, but now, it’s like you two were strangers to one another.

You, having enough of this, gathered your courage and march over to her classroom. When she tried to ignore you, you huff and welcome yourself to their classroom and walk towards her. She panic as she tried to run away, but you grab her wrist in time.

“When will you stop running away from me?!”

“When the tension between us is gone!”

“But.. I like you too, Ann!”

This cause her eyes to widen at your confession. And tears began to pour out of her eyes, she doesn’t know if its relief or happiness, but now she knew her feelings were requited and you feel the same about her.

She promises that the two of you will go through everyone’s criticism together.

Yusuke Kitagawa

What attracted him to you is your artistic skills, yes, nothing more. Jk. No, that’s only the beginning. He does admit he admires your skills in art, but what he adores about you is how you smile to him, welcome him to the school, how you gave him some of your food and help him in buying art supplies by halving your allowance. He’s forever grateful to you.

Unfortunately, this boy is the same as you, being oblivious to the fact he loves you MORE than a FRIEND. Which made his friends sigh at the two of you. Well, you know the saying, “Two idiots are better together.” 

“There’s no such saying like that.” -Makoto

Though Yusuke’s case is much more understandable, since he didn’t grow up in a favorable household, with no one telling him love and such. He devoted his life in his arts, and was pick up by his master, Madarame. But was ultimately betrayed by him.

Anyway, you two will hang out like normal. But, unlike your clueless self, Yusuke will pick up on his heart beating faster around you, how he started to become nervous whenever he’s near you and how he started to view you in a different light.

He thought he was ill, really. Until the Phantom Thieves explained to him that he was in love with you. 

He decided to believe in them, I mean, there’s no reason for them to lie, right? So he asked their advice.

“Ooh! Ask her to paint her nude!”

“NO! FUTABA-CHAN!”

“That’s brilliant! Why didn’t I think of that?”

“...” 

“...Yusuke.. no.”

So Yusuke decided to just tell you, but he didn’t account to the fact that you were also clueless and oblivious. So when he confessed to you, you were confused.

Yusuke decided to explain to you what he understand from his friends. And you started to understand it as well.

And the two of you decided to try it out, if it fails, then the two of you can still be friends. But not to worry! Luckily, the feeling of love is mutual between the two of you, and you two were NOT planning to break it off any time sooner.

Makoto Niijima

What attracted you to her is your dedication to your studies and beliefs, how you also carry yourself in such a prideful manner yet everyone around you respects you (which she’s totally not jealous of) and the fact that you will stand up to yourself if you feel them saying something bad about you or the people. Makoto admires these traits of yours from afar as she watches you animatedly argue to the teacher about something which she doesn’t understand, she marvels at the sight of you.

If you’re in the Student Council, she would try to befriend you. But she’s so socially awkward that you decided to be her friend, probably out of pity. She was BEYOND embarrassed at this encounter, it was so unlike her! But nevertheless, she was happy that you’re her friend now.

You two can be seen hanging out in Makoto’s office as she signs all the papers while you are either helping her or just talking to her about your day. She’s happy either way really, but she much enjoys hearing your voice over her scribbles on the papers.

You might think Makoto is also oblivious or clueless, but I don’t think she’s that kind of person. I think she knows that she’s falling in love with you and, like Ann, panics about it.

Unlike Ann though, Makoto doesn’t confides it to her friends, preferring to keep it to herself. But if Akira max out her friendship, she would bring it up to him. Akira just listens as she explains it to him, before saying the same thing he said to Ann.

Nervous would be an understatement for Makoto. You might think she’ll confront you about her feelings, oh no no my dear. I believe she’ll outright IGNORE it.

You’ll slowly notice how Makoto tries to ignore you and avoid you. You think that you must’ve done something wrong for Makoto to act like this. So, you did the most logical thing, you did a Kabedon on her.

She shriek a bit when your hand slammed on the wall behind her as she stares at your innocent face. “W-Wha--?”

“Why’re you ignoring me, Mako-chan?” 

She b l u s h e s. 

She tried run away from you but you hold her in place with your hand on either side of her body. 

With no other options, she decided to just tell you about her feelings. 

You listened as she spills out her secret to you, that she’s bi, that she likes you for a while and that if she tells you, she’ll risk getting told off by other people and risking losing you. 

I think, even though you’re clueless and oblivious, you knew that she meant more than a friend. You told her the truth, that you don’t really know what kind of love you hold for her (she saddened at that) but when she confessed, it made your chest beat faster and float. 

Makoto blinks, once, twice, thrice, before flashing you a smile and bringing you in a relieved hug. Tears started to build on her eyes as she exhale a sigh of relief.

She also promises you that you two will go through the criticism of society together.

Haru Okumura

What attracted her to you is how you also took an interest to plants and take care of them. She’s also attracted to your strong will to be yourself despite everyone telling you to change, you paid them no heed. You also don’t let others push you around, not even your parents (if you have one). 

Out of all the girls, she’ll immediately accept the fact she’s bi and in love with you.

I would like to think she’ll also take it slow in asking you out, Like Akira, she’ll start out with giving you small trinkets that reminded her of you, giving you your favorite food and giving you meaningful flowers. (I would like to think she knows Victorian Flower Language).

She would probably be subtle about her affection towards you. But I would DEFINITELY see her giving you flowers that means admiration, affection and love. (With you being clueless about the meaning of the flowers).

Haru, unlike the others, doesn’t mind if you’re clueless and oblivious to her affection. In fact, she enjoys seeing you being your clueless self. 

I think she’ll be open about her feelings to you to her Phantom Thieves, with them accepting her for who she is. 

Unlike before, she had to hide the fact she’s bi since her father thought it was a disgrace to the Okumura’s family name. But now, no longer in her father’s control, she can be open about her sexuality and no longer feels insecure about it.

When she confesses to you, expect it being simple enough. She would bring you two flowers that means love (White Carnation and Red Carnation). You would accept them, of course, and then she would confess her love to you.

You, being your clueless self, thought meant that she wants to be more than friends. “So.. we’re best friends now?”

Haru, nonetheless, giggles as she shakes her head. “Nope. I want to be your partner for life, [Y/N]-chan! Your girlfriend!”

When it finally register in your mind, you immediately became twins to the Red Carnation. Haru giggles once more to your cute expression as she brings you to a hug.

(I hope you accept her confession, or else you’ll feel the wrath of the Phantom Thieves...)

You two will DEFINITELY promise to each other that you’ll love each other, no matter what anyone says. 

Futaba Sakura

What attracted her to you is how funny you can be and how good you are in programming, like hacking and encoding codes. How you speak for yourself if you’re being downgraded by someone. How you speak so easily to someone about technical stuff. She REALLY wants to befriend you, but she’s still a socially-awkward NEET girl.

You’ll probably notice her staring at you, before her turning her head away in embarrassment. You have to be the one befriending her in this case. 

When you befriend her, you two will be inseparable. You two will do everything together, prank calling someone, hacking into a website, encoding codes, and probably make a game together.

Futaba was so happy that she finally has a friend that’s almost like her, seeing the world in the same yet different point. 

I can totally see her like Yusuke, being oblivious and clueless about her feelings to you.

When Futaba started to feel something weird happening to her, she freaks out. IS SHE SICK?!

The Phantom Thieves, and Sojiro, explained to her that no, she’s not sick and no, she’s not gonna die. They’ll explain to her that she’s in love with you.

Futaba is aware of the LGBTQ+ but she didn’t think it was possible to a girl like her. But she guess it’s the case where you’re disclose to everyone and someone comes in and you’re immediately in love with them. 

“No Futaba. That’s called obsession.”

“... same thing.”

Like the Futaba we all know and love, she doesn’t know what to do. She panics whenever you show up or she thinks about her feelings. 

Then, one day, she decided to just tell you and get it over with. But she decided to do it very uniquely. 

She programmed a website that reveals to you about her feelings. When you open it, it pops out, “I ❤ u. Would u be my girlfriend?” 

You immediately knew what she meant, even though you’re clueless and oblivious. You threw yourself to a anxiously waiting and fidgeting Futaba, who screams as she catches you and both of you falling to the ground.

You two promise that no matter what anyone says, you two will be together forever. She’s your number one after all~

Goro Akechi

What attracted him to you is how you carried yourself, similar to Makoto basically, and your intellectual ability. He’s also attracted to your observant and quiet nature, and how you appear to be aloof at times, you were also listening to others conversation (COUGH so me COUGH). And the fact that you saw him through his mask and lies. 

He befriends you immediately and the two of you hit it off fairly easily. The two of your personality coinciding with each other. 

If he feels himself falling in love with you, he’ll deny it. He doesn’t want you involve any more than this, he already befriended you, he doesn’t need to give you anymore danger. But he couldn’t help the fact that he already has opened his heart to you. 

But he knew you were clueless and oblivious, so he decided to go along with it. Hiding away his feelings. 

He thought he was being sneaky, but the Phantom Thieves caught on his feelings for you. At first, they don’t encourage him, since he’s a traitor still. But they soon accepted it and supported him.

Akechi was still hesitant to follow his heart but Akira encourages him. So he decided to court you in a traditional way. 

He started out slow, similar to Haru’s and Akira’s. Giving you small trinkets, buying your favorite food and taking you places to places. 

He thought you’ll leave him after his reputation was tarnish after Shido admitting his crimes. But you stayed with him, so he decided to confess to you.

You, being clueless, thought he was referring not wanting to be friends with you since he’s wording goes, “I don’t wanna be friends with you anymore.. I can’ take it..-”

You started to tear up and Akechi flinch when he sees tears in your eyes. Wha-?

“You don’t want to be friends with me, Akechi-kun?” You sniffed and Akechi now realized his mistake.

“N-NO! I MEAN--!”

You bursted out crying, which attracted attention to the both of you. “Akechi-kun doesn’t like me anymore!”

“[Y-Y/N]! C-Calm down! I love you!” Akechi proclaims as he held your crying face between his hands.

You sniff as you stared at him. “.. you do?”

Akechi nodded his head. “Yeah.. and I want to be your boyfriend, [Y/N].”

You decided to just nodded your head, not trusting your voice as Akechi held you in pure ecstatically, completely ignoring the stares you two are getting.

Yuuki Mishima

What attracted him to you is the fact you stood up to him when he was getting bullied, and your determination to stand up against the bullies, even though it got you wounded. He was forever grateful to you though, that’s a plus. He’s also attracted to the fact that you believe in the Phantom Thieves’ justice, just like him.

He already knew he was in love with you since a long time ago. (fun fact: you two are childhood friends). He’ll always worry about you if you get beaten up by bullies,

The fact that you were clueless and oblivious is what Mishima GREATLY dislikes about you. It’s already embarrassing that you’re the one sticking up for him, but the fact that HE has to make the first move. 

Mishima might need encouragement before actually doing something, that someone would be Akira ofc. After him encouraging the bby fanboy, Mishima would be walking up to you but his confidence would slowly go down and would ultimately back out at the last second. (Akira and Morgana sighing in the background).

I would think Mishima would confess on you by accident rlly. While doing the project, he’ll accidentally slip it out.

You (ofc) thought he meant being best friends. Mishima decided to let you believe he meant that. 

Akira would sigh in frustration and just resort in talking to you directly. 

He would explain that Mishima loves you, and not as a friend, as a girlfriend and he’ll also add that Mishima is a chicken.

You would ultimately be the one confessing to his flustered self, who just nodded his head. 

[I tried, okay? But I’m not used to Mishima’s character yet ;-; srry bby boi]

[x] Main Page || [x] Persona 5 Page

[danganronpa-21]

Naegiri Week Day 6 - Date

I did it!! I know I’m pretty late, but hey, Eon said submissions still count so I’m still going lol (thank you for the patience). This one’s a bit on the longer side and contains switching POVs, but it’s pretty easy to follow as each first line introduces either Makoto or Kyoko by name. I’ve been agonizing over it for awhile now, so hopefully you get some enjoyment out of it. If not, at least take some pleasure in the fact that I had to edit out some of my use of the word “smile” from the original draft, for I used the word 13 separate times. This is why we draft, kids. Anyway, no warnings to issue this time around.

I’ll be back to bring you Festival sometime soon. Thanks so much for your support and attention!

______________

“I’m excited for our big night tonight, Kyoko!”

Her partner’s words echoed like a horrid earworm in her mind as she jotted down her most recent case notes. They’d been vibrating around in her head since the moment he uttered them; they plagued her all throughout the car ride to the Hope’s Peak building. Even now, while he was off dealing with a misbehaving teacher case, she could not get his statement to stop pestering her. She had to be the worst girlfriend in the world to have forgotten something so important as to be classified as “big night”. Simply imagining the disappointment on Makoto’s face if she confessed to not knowing the significance of the date made her heart drop. She was never the best at remembering anniversaries and birthdays without much of a reminder; her schedule was far too busy to help her recall every significant thing. What was peculiar about this situation was that Kyoko didn’t even have the benefit of being able to check her schedule. Normally, she marked off all of their important relationship milestones on their calendar so she wouldn’t forget… but for whatever reason, today’s date wasn’t in there. No red ink scribbling circles around sloppily scrawled words, no little star stickers that her boyfriend got her into the habit of using. Just a dotting of blue ink to tell her that she had a dentist appointment the following day. Her past self refused to even give an inkling of a hint.

 Still, if there was one thing that Kyoko knew best about herself, it was that she was stubborn. A stubborn detective, at that! There was no way that she would allow herself to be bested by a simple mystery such as this. If she didn’t have any clues of her own to work with, she’d just have to start off somewhere else. Of course, what else was better to start off with than witnesses? That was how Aoi came into the picture.

Well, it would be, if she weren’t several minutes late. The tardiness was admittedly a bit strange given that she had a free period, but it wasn’t super out of character for Aoi. She tended to get so excited and ahead of herself that sometimes she would almost miss work meetings entirely. Kyoko couldn’t count the number of times on both hands that she’d come rushing in to a staff meeting over twenty minutes late. All she hoped was that she would get there sooner than Makoto would get back. To have him catch them in the middle of this discussion could be mortifying. She feared she might break his heart if she let him know that she forgot. A quick and easy bit of advice or clues from Aoi would really be ideal.

 She massaged her temples with one hand and leaned over to poke her phone awake with the other. 9:03 A.M. Aoi was officially thirteen minutes late, and in all honesty, Kyoko wondered if she should start to worry. What if Makoto had intercepted her or something? Or was she perhaps the troublesome teacher he intended to deal with? The latter seemed unlikely, but she didn’t want to rule out any possibilities. Ugh, all of this would be so much easier if she knew what Makoto had been alluding to in the first place! If it hadn’t been for Aoi arriving almost as if she were on cue, Kyoko might have given into her desire to bash her head into the desk.

 “Sorry I’m late, Kyoko!” The swimmer’s voice was just as chipper as ever, and her forehead just as sweaty. Did her morning jog run long or something? “I got a little caught up. You know how it is.”

 Kyoko sighed, doing her best to pretend to be less disgruntled than she actually was. “Indeed, I do. Still, I should thank you for coming on such short notice.”

 Aoi’s ponytail swung back and forth as she strutted to the seat across from Kyoko and plopped herself down; the manner of it all reminded her of being told to sit more lady-like by her grandfather. She tried not to scowl at the thought of him. They had been through a bit of a rough patch lately. “Of course! Anything to help one of my favourite girls.”

 The taller woman laughed softly, reaching up to brush some stray hands of hair away from her face. “I am quite glad to hear you say that, Asahina-san. You see, I have something to ask you.”

 Almost instantly, Aoi folded her arms across her chest. She turned her nose up at the detective jokingly. “You may not ask me anything unless you call me by first name. You know that’s okay!”

 She let out a half-amused sigh and did her best not to show her pleasure on her face. “Aoi, if I ask you something, do you promise not to tell Makoto that I asked?”

 Aoi’s eyes widened; her body suddenly shot forward with interest. Normally, one might have reacted with a bit of apprehension over being asked to keep a secret from their friend’s paramour, but Aoi seemed to relish it. The smile that spread across her face all but proved it. Figures. Aoi probably expected to be asked about what he was thinking of doing for their next date night or something cute like that. “Ooh! What’s going on? What do you wanna know?”

 In any other situation, there would be lots Kyoko could ask. After all, Aoi was their one friend who was not only mutual, but a confidant. She wouldn’t be able to get the same information out of Yasuhiro and Toko that she could out of Aoi, and it was vice versa for Makoto. This wasn’t to say that she begged Aoi to regularly break Makoto’s trust, or that he did anything of that sort to her – it was just that the swimmer could tend to point either of them in the right direction. When Makoto struggled to ask Kyoko for a birthday present, he would tell Aoi and eventually she would tell Kyoko what he wanted. When Kyoko was too embarrassed to confess to her feelings to Makoto’s face, she would tell Aoi and she would encourage Makoto to move in the right direction to get her to open up. It definitely wasn’t a system of broken trust, but a little one that worked for them and kept things moving to their advantage. They could function without Aoi if they wanted to, but she enjoyed helping them along. She was perhaps the person most invested in their relationship apart from themselves… and maybe Komaru.

 Kyoko drummed her fingers on the desk absent-mindedly; somehow she found she would rather watch herself move than make eye contact with her friend. It must have something to do with her embarrassment over the whole not knowing the day thing, she assumed. “Aoi… do you know why today is significant in mine and Makoto’s relationship?”

 Aoi blinked, pressing a finger to her lower lip. “Ummm… no. Why is it significant? Did I miss something?”

 “It is not a rhetorical question. I am genuinely asking. Makoto asked me if I was excited for our special night this morning, and I haven’t the faintest idea what he meant.”

 “Oh! Uhhh…” the cogs in her mind seemed to turn slowly; her gaze darting around the room as if she would somehow find the answer there. It was such an artificial-looking thinking process, yet Kyoko found herself holding her breath as she awaited a response. “I… I dunno. He didn’t mention anything to me about tonight being special.”

 Kyoko let out a groan, throwing her head into her hands. “What am I going to do?! He’s expecting a perfect night, and I don’t have anything planned.”

 “Maybe… um…” she paused for but a second, “Throw on some lingerie and hope for the best?”

 The detective scowled at her. “Very funny. You know he and I aren’t… physically intimate.”

 “Aww, c’mon Kyoko-chan, don’t feel bad,” Aoi said, her arm darting across the desk to pry at Kyoko’s wrist, “I’m sure there’s gotta be someone who knows what Makoto’s all excited about.”

 “What if there isn’t? The last thing I want to do is hurt Makoto’s feelings. I cannot afford to make such a careless mistake.”

 “Well how do you know that it was you who made the mistake? Maybe he forgot what day it is, not you!”

 Somehow, that didn’t lift Kyoko’s spirits. Mostly because of how improbable it sounded. While Makoto tended to forget more trivial matters like whose turn it was to do the dishes, he never forgot important dates. Especially not when it came to their relationship. Based on what Aoi told her, he bought most of his anniversary and birthday gifts for her over three weeks in advance. Preparedness when it came to their relationship seemed to be his strong suit, quite unlike her. Without anything to show for the upcoming night, she would look like a selfish girlfriend.

 “While I respect that you are trying to cheer me up, Asahina-san, I seriously doubt that that’s the case. You know just as well as I do how diligent he is when it comes to our relationship,” her fingers somehow worked their way back to her temples, massaging them almost aggressively, “If anyone has forgotten anything, it is most certainly me.”

 Aoi’s eyes glittered with sympathy as she watched her friend, still trying to hold her arm. Kyoko imagined that she was mostly trying to pat her forearm, but had somehow settled for gripping her awkwardly. It was less comforting and more like she’d been caught in a trap; nevertheless, she decided to appreciate the sentiment behind it. “Please don’t be too hard on yourself, Kyoko-chan. Naegi-kun wouldn’t want you to do that, even if you forgot. I’m sure he’ll understand. He’s super sweet like that!”

 That is true, Kyoko thought to herself. If anything, Makoto would find it within himself to understand her perspective. Work had been incredibly busy for both of them lately, and they did have a lot of other friendship and familial obligations to attend to… Would it truly be so awful for her to have forgotten one measly little date? She couldn’t have the answer to that question. Nobody could. There were only so many circumstances in which that things could work out for her, and it all depended on how much value the date held. If it was something huge, like an anniversary, she would never forgive herself – even if Makoto did. However, should it have been something small, she figured that they would be able to brush it off and at least try to have a good time. Value determined everything, and of course it was on the list of things she didn’t know. All she had as a clue was that the date was special somehow.

 “I appreciate the optimism, but I just don’t think I can go through the rest of today without knowing what’s going on.” She sighed, doing her best to avoid pouting like a spoiled child. While there were several things that she would confess to hating, not knowing important things hung at the top. Probably somewhere around number two on her list of hated things, coming just below coriander. Blegh. “Is there anything else I can do to figure this out?”

 Aoi shrugged, still wearing that same signature smile of hers. “Why not try asking some of the others? Komaru-chan should be in helping Fukawa-san, maybe you could ask her for help. She’s his little sister, after all!” The swimmer tapped her chin. “I guess you could try Togami-kun, too, but I don’t know how nice he would be about it. I know you guys kind of like to rib each other.”

 ‘Like to rib each other’ was a sugar coating of the truth, but Kyoko supposed it encapsulated their relationship nonetheless. Byakuya was admittedly the last person she wanted to go to for help with this Makoto situation, yet the difficulty of it all gave her little choice in the matter. In fact, she considered it to be completely unavoidable.

 “I suppose you’re right there. I’ll see about talking to Komaru-chan about it first. If that fails,” one of her hands curled into a fist, “I will bite the bullet and confront Byakuya.”

 Aoi giggled softly, finally releasing Kyoko’s arm and hopping to her feet. “That’s the spirit! Now, was that all you needed, Boss?”

 For her friend’s sake, Kyoko did her best to grin a little. Though she herself hadn’t been able to help, Aoi provided her own information that would make this anxiety-inducing task much easier. Kyoko surely owed her for that. “Yes. Sorry to call you into my office for so little, but I was getting restless. Is there any way I can compensate you for your troubles?”

 Aoi waved it off. “Don’t be silly, Kyoko-chan! We’re friends, I’m here to help you any time you need it,” amusement tugged at her lips, “That being said, though… if you have to compensate me… mind buying me a donut on your next coffee run?”

 Kyoko shook her head, trying not to show how much Aoi’s request made her laugh. Of course she’d ask for a donut. “That is… doable, yes. I presume you want the Boston Kreme again?”

 The swimmer’s face lit up with glee, her hands clapping together excitedly. “Oh god, please. I haven’t had one in soooo long. They’re so yummy.”

 Kyoko could agree with that statement. It hadn’t been until her time in Hope’s Peak that she first tried a Boston Kreme donut, but she found it to be quite a hit on her tastebuds. Definitely on her list of favourites, and Aoi’s too. The girl once joked that that was how she knew that they would be good friends. “Sounds good to me. You are dismissed, Aoi-chan. Have a good day.”

 “Thanks, Kyoko-chan! You too!”

 With that, the swimmer spun on her heel and wandered towards the door, sending herself off with a wave to her friend before closing the door behind her. God, what relief Aoi’s presence had been. Of course, Kyoko could only notice it now that she had left. Stress settled back into her the moment she departed, bearing down on her like a blue whale. Though she knew she still had the hope of Komaru and Byakuya’s assistance, doubt sprouted in her heart. What if they couldn’t help her? Oh, what would she do?

 She squeezed her eyes shut. The absolute last thing she wanted to think about the way Makoto would look when she eventually confessed to being clueless. His normally chipper expression would still remain on his face, but she would see it falter. The corners of his mouth would twitch down for a split second, the joy weakening without actually ever having to disappear. His shoulders would slump, and he would move to push a hand through his hair to make things seem more casual. He would want to show her that he was more relaxed about it than he actually was. She would be able to see the hurt cloud his eyes.

 Ugh. She didn’t want to think about that. Stealing one last long look at her paperwork, she sighed and pushed herself to her feet. If she was going to avoid the terrible, horrible fate of disappointing her boyfriend, she had better get a move on in talking to Komaru and Byakuya. The guidance committee’s not-as-problematic-as-stated student situation would have to wait.

 __________

 Makoto would be lying if he said he wasn’t worried about his fiancée.

 He hadn’t been, when he’d woken up this morning. In fact, he’d been pretty excited to spend the day with her. The two of them planned this day for ages. From the blankets they would snuggle up with to the snacks they would eat, the couple made sure everything had its place. Makoto even promised her he’d make his famous popcorn-chocolate-marshmallow bars. It was tradition for their Dead Trial marathons, after all. Kyoko tended to say that it wouldn’t have felt like a proper marathon without them. Good snacks and cozy blankets were the best thing for a day inside watching their favourite show. All they had to do was get through their long day of work. That was how it seemed at the time, anyway. Now, Makoto didn’t feel so sure.

  Kyoko’s morning demeanour changed within an instant; the moment he made mention of the day caught her in a loop of seeming unease. Her expression crumpled, falling back into its neutrality. How funny, so many years ago he would never have seen her iron mask as a sign of worry. Just a sign of Kyoko being Kyoko. These days, though, he knew better than to think that. Any emotion she gave him would be better than the cold, hard stare. The mask hid fear, the face showed affection.

  His fingers tapped on the surface of the window ledge; eyes fixed intently on the world outside. He could see two students, both girls, hanging out around the fountain on what he presumed to be a date. One with black hair and the other with brown, grinning and giggling together. The dark-haired girl was trying to feed the other a spicy tuna roll, but it dropped from her chopsticks and bounced into the fountain. Her date threw her head back laughing at how clumsy the dark-haired girl was, forcing her face to turn rose-red. At any other time, he was sure he would have felt happy for them. Even if they were skipping class to have quality time, sometimes good romance was worth that kind of thing.

 He couldn’t deny that the sight of the girls made him think of Kyoko. At the end of everything, he hoped that the two of them would have a night like those two students were having. His heart ached at the image of the two of them sitting there, a foot apart and not touching at all. No blankets draped over them, no snacks placed in their laps, no emotion as they tried to enjoy their show. He would reach for his partner’s hand but she would scarcely respond, just staring almost blankly at the screen in front of her. Her leg would be bouncing up and down like a basketball, but when he asked, she would deny being nervous. It would be a torturous, awful night; neither of them would enjoy it the way they thought they would. Then, the two of them would creep off to bed, and she would sleep with her back turned to him. She wouldn’t even try to cuddle up in his arms like she usually did.

 His gaze flicked down to his watch. 11:49, it read. His little sister was running late. She had sent him a text asking to meet him outside of classroom 8-B, and somehow had not made a point of being there on time herself. He didn’t think it was too much to expect, given that she had been the one to ask that they meet in the first place. In some sense, he shouldn’t have been surprised. It was quite like Komaru to be flaky. Makoto loved his younger sister, he really did, but sometimes the girl was just trouble. 

 He let out a sigh as he watched the girls pluck the roll out of the fountain’s water, the sunlight beaming brightly on their smiling faces. He leaned on his hand, silently wishing he could be as carefree as they were. The headmaster was leagues away from being a high schooler, but when relationship communication issues like this happened, he felt like he was right back in it again. At the end of the day, he just hoped nothing was seriously wrong with Kyoko. He hated to think that something might be wrong, and she just hadn’t had the courage to tell him.

 “Hey! Makoto!”

 Finally. Komaru’s voice snapped him out of his worries as he turned his head to look at her coming down the hall. She held a stack of paper in her arms, and her hands were brutally smudged with ink. A pair of glasses rested on her nose. Figures. She asked him to meet her, and then got caught up in drawing her manga. That was so like her. Still, he pushed down his annoyance, cracking a small smile as he made eye contact with his baby sister.

 “Hey, Komaru,” he greeted, his hands resting on his hips, “I see you’re running late, as always.”

 Komaru’s tongue found its way out of her mouth before her words did. “I see you’re still a jerk, as always,” she huffed, quickly putting her flustered run into a full stop, “Thank you for coming, though.”

 “You’re more than welcome. You said there was something you wanted to talk to me about?” 

 Komaru’s fingers reached up to scratch at her cheek, the smile playing at her lips turning sheepish. Whatever she would say next, he knew he probably would not like it. It was all a sign that Komaru had either already made or intended to make trouble. Trouble that he would likely have to clean up, he might add. 

 “Okay, so like… I know you’ve told me before that you really don’t want me to meddle in your relationship with Kyoko-” 

 Makoto closed his eyes, the tips of his fingers digging in to his hips in an attempt to quell his frustration. “I don’t, and I really hope you’re about to tell me that you haven’t.”

The smile grew even more sheepish, prompting Makoto to groan. His palm hit his forehead before he even thought to make the motion himself. Why did she have to do this to him? Why couldn’t she just pretend to vomit every time they kissed, like a normal younger sister? 

 “Okay so like… I didn’t totally ruin anything or tell her anything bad, but she did come to me asking for advice on something,” Komaru confessed, shrugging her shoulders, “And I thought you should know that she’s worried about something.”

 “Do you know what it is?” He asked immediately, his eyes widening a bit. God, he hoped she came to tell him what Kyoko was worried about. It would make things so much easier for them. After all, if Kyoko wouldn’t tell him why she was acting weird, and he didn’t know, then Komaru would be the only bridge between the two of them. It wasn’t like Aoi had had anything to say when he’d initially asked her. He was running out of options.

 Komaru tittered awkwardly, clutching her inked papers a little more tightly. One could only hope that the ink was not fresh, lest it stain her suit jacket. It was pressed far too close to her body. “You see, about that, I do, but-”

 He blinked quickly, taking a few steps forward. Whatever it was, he needed to know, and he needed to know it well. “What is it?”

 She actually cringed as she spoke, wincing like she thought that her brother was going to smack her. “She told me I wasn’t allowed to tell you.”

 He hit the window ledge with his hand, wincing as pain shot through it. Maybe not the best idea, but dammit, he was pissed off. How could she give him a flicker of hope, only to take it away a minute later? That was just too cruel. “Ugh! Why would you say anything if you knew I wasn’t supposed to know?”

 “I came to give you a hint to point you in the right direction,” she whined, stomping her foot like it was their mother scolding her rather than him, “She said I can’t tell you, but I figured you had a right to know.” 

 He swallowed thickly, the crease between his brows suddenly feeling as deep as a chasm. His body fell strangely still as he waited for Komaru’s eventual reveal. Though she couldn’t tell him much, there had to be something more to this. Surely, he could ask just a few more questions. “Is it something bad?”

 “Well, uh… hard to say. It’s nothing really bad, but it might hurt your feelings a bit.”

  To no one’s surprise, that comment did little to soothe his persisting anxieties. If anything, it planted a seed of dread in his stomach. Not only was his partner clearly hiding something from him, she was now confirmed to be hiding something that would hurt his feelings if he knew. He bit his lip. 

 “How badly, do you think?” His voice left so much weaker than usual; the ache of what Kyoko hid from him this morning digging into his soul. If he thought his palms were sweaty before, they had gained some wetness now. “Like, do you think she’s gonna dump me?”

 Komaru shook her head frantically. “Definitely not. In fact, part of the reason why she’s upset is because she likes you so much. That’s the way it seemed, anyway.”

 Makoto sighed, his hand reaching to fidget with his watch. “Are you sure you can’t just tell me what it is and I’ll pretend to be surprised if she brings it up?” 

 “Sorry, big bro. No can do. We both know you’re an awful actor.” A twinge of a smirk pricked her face. “Still, try not to worry too much. I think you’ll be able to get it out of her eventually, she’s just… worried about it, that’s all. I didn’t want you to get too in over your head if you could avoid it.”

 “I appreciate that, Komaru. Thank you.” He paused. “Is there anything else you needed to tell me?”

 “Just that you’re a nerd.”

 “Oh, come on! What are you, eleven?”

 “Yeah, an eleven out of ten!” She exclaimed with a snort, incredibly pleased with what was at best a mediocre joke.

 Makoto rolled his eyes at his little sister. “It’s like you never left middle school.”

 __________

 Kyoko wanted nothing more than to repeatedly slam her head into a wall. Step one of her plan, gathering witnesses, had proven itself to be a total bust. Not only had she completely missed with Komaru, who had no idea what she was talking about — but she’d been screwed over with Byakuya, too. He had given her no clear answers about the date, and the jerk actually laughed at her when she confessed to not knowing the significance. Clearly, he wanted to take it as some victory to hold over her head. Proof of his superiority to her or something like that. She honestly didn’t know, and could not bring herself to care. She’d left his office in more than a bit of a huff, plunking herself down in her own chair much too harshly when she finally got back to her own space. It left her with a deep hole of disappointment in her stomach; one that she suppressed all afternoon as she plunged back into her paperwork. She stayed that way until lunchtime, the pit only serving to worsen when her boyfriend wandered in.

 “Come on, honey, you really should break for lunch,” Makoto said, shooting her that same smile that won the heart of anyone who saw it, “You’ve been at that work all day.”

 Her head flicked up from the boring scribblings of ink, eyes wide with surprise. Sure, she’d half-noticed that he entered the room, but hearing him was a completely different thing. Normally his voice and presence comforted her; it took weight off her shoulders on hard days. Today, on the other hand, made hearing it seem like she was getting smacked in the face with a tennis racket — vaguely painful and incredibly startling.

 “Oh,” she paused, blinking at him as if she didn’t quite believe he was real, “That time already, huh?”

 The luckster nodded cheerfully, glancing down at the two sleek black boxes he held in his arms. They were stacked one on top of the other, one marked with her initials and the other with his. Same as always, made as sweetly as always. She swallowed hard. Why did he have to be the perfect partner? It would certainly make her mess-ups a little easier to deal with if he would just screw up every once in a while. If he could just screw up majorly on something for once, it would be helpful.

 “Yup! Can’t say I blame you for forgetting, though. You almost forgot your lunch at home. Pretty hard to remember to eat without your food, y’know?” 

 Yes, her forgetting made sense. After Makoto brought up the big night, she lost all focus. From then on, all energy went into agonizing over what she’d been unable to recall. She must have left her bento sitting right on the counter, where he always put it after finishing the preparations. 

  Kyoko smiled sheepishly. “Sorry. I guess it must have slipped my mind, with our big night and all,” it was a ploy for hints, and she wondered if it would work, “I was reviewing our plans so much that I didn’t even think about grabbing it.”

 To this, Makoto laughed. “Ever diligent, as always. I hadn’t realized that you had so many plans for it! Actually, that reminds me of something.”

 “Oh?” Kyoko feigned innocence, batting her eyelashes at him. “What is it?”

 “I was thinking that it might be a good idea to head to the store after work to pick up some stuff for tonight.” 

 “What kind of stuff?” She asked, knowing that the question would give her a little more without entirely selling her out to him. Minute by minute, she inched closer to figuring this out, and she couldn’t be more thrilled. Relief would wash over her in no time, if he would just be a good witness and comply.

 “You know, the usual for the night.” He answered with a shrug, pulling his phone out of his pocket. She could only presume that he was verifying his list. Oh, how she longed to snatch the phone out of his hands and read it all for herself. It was almost as if he was deliberately being cryptic. Her boyfriend was a wiggly salamander trying to slip out of her grasp. “I was thinking about picking up some ice cream for dessert, but I don’t know what flavour I should get.”

 Aha! A clue! A cryptic one, but still, it was a clue nevertheless. She fought off the urge to scribble it down on the precious paperwork she’d been buried in only a moment prior. A good detective should be able to commit such a fact to memory with ease, her grandfather told her once. Though she hated thinking about him, she supposed that he was right, especially considering the person she was interrogating was standing right in front of her.  

 “I’m sure that I could help you with that,” she giggled, giddy from having found a small clue, “I promise not to get stuck between black cherry and pralines and cream like I did last time.” 

 Makoto shook his head, grinning over the memory. The two of them must have spent an half an hour in that grocery store, bouncing between the pros and cons of each flavour. They had only been intending to pick it up for a simple treat night, yet Kyoko found herself paralyzed by indecision. The two of them had had such a horribly long day at that point, and she’d just wanted to settle down with the perfect ice cream. God, she would kill to have a night like that again. If she ever figured out what their plans were for their special night, she didn’t know if she could enjoy them. After all, she’d expended so much energy on figuring out what the plans would be that she might run out of energy before they even got there. 

 “I think you probably could, yeah. I’ll meet you here after school; is three-thirtyish okay?” 

 She nodded. “Sounds perfect.”

 “Great! Now that that’s settled, though… wanna go have a picnic in the Garden of Statues?”

 That had been where they left it in the office that day, a spark of hope bursting in Kyoko’s chest. Though she hadn’t been able to solve her boyfriend’s surprisingly difficult riddle right then, she was confident that she would be hot on its trail soon. She spent most of the rest of the day scribbling away at her paperwork until he came to meet her at three thirty-two. The couple were a pair of beaming faces, the two of them wandering into the nearest pharmacy/retail store in search of whatever goodies Makoto had on his list. Not that Kyoko knew what they were. In all honesty, she was a little surprised that that was even the place he wanted to go. Still, she appreciated the tip-off that it was not the most formal evening the two of them had ever had. Every hint was one she grabbed at with fervour. At this point, she needed every one she could get. The sand in the hourglass was running low.

 Even with the confirmation of the lack of formality, everything he had put in their box didn’t make sense. Salted caramel popcorn, shampoo, sponges, marshmallows, hand soap, tortilla chips, razor blades, hiyoko cakes, headache pills, chocolate, medicinal tea blends, calbee shrimp snacks, pretzels, wasabi peas, tissues… None of these things made any sense together. Separate the snacks from the household items and then maybe one could get something, but Makoto stated specifically that he was buying for their evening. Kyoko pressed her lips together, wondering whether he was just feeling snackish or if he genuinely needed these things. Part of her itched to ask him, but she worried that even that might blow her cover. Instead, she chose to quietly follow behind him, watching him continue to pluck things off the shelves. 

 “Is there anything you want apart from the ice cream, Kiri?” Makoto questioned, not meeting her gaze as his hands found a bag of pizza potato chips. Her tongue stuck out at the thought of them. They were his favourite flavour of chips, but she couldn’t stand them. Of course, it didn’t bother him any. He didn’t have to share. “You can have whatever you want. Sky’s the limit tonight!” 

 She forced herself to grin half-heartedly; the muscles in her face protested from the extra effort it took. She hoped he didn’t notice her picking at the studs of her gloves like they were a scab she could remove. “I don’t think there’s anything else I want. You go ahead and pick out whatever you would like.”

 It was only then that he twisted his head to look back at her, one eyebrow raised. Uh-oh, she thought. Must have awoken suspicion in him. “Are you sure?” 

 She nodded. “Positive. Go right on ahead.” 

 A frown carved its way into his expression. For a moment he opened his mouth as if he were going to say something, and then closed it just as promptly. He turned back towards their box and rearranged a few things as if nothing was wrong. That alone was enough to make her heart beat faster, and her breathing grow heavy. With how things were progressing, she risked actually managing to tear the silver studs from her gloves. 

 The silence persisted between the two of them for about a minute or so after Makoto rearranged their items; they wandered down a few more aisles before finally stopping in front of the frozen foods. Shivers shot through Kyoko as they walked. Unfortunately, her pencil skirt left her legs susceptible to the frigid air exuding off the freezers. She pushed herself up against him without thinking, hoping the proximity would allow her to thieve some of his warmth. 

 “Feeling a little chilly, Kyoko?” He snickered. 

 She nuzzled his shoulder. “It’s cold here.”

 He smirked slightly, pressing an awkward kiss to the side of her head. “I know, it is pretty cold. We should be out of here soon enough, though. Just as soon as you decide what ice cream you want…!”

 She groaned, slapping a hand to her forehead.

 “You promised you’d help me pick.”

 The detective only grumbled in response, stopping to turn to look at her options through the glass door. Her eyes scanned the shelves for anything that grabbed her, not taking notice of the way her partner was watching her as she worked. Her lips pursed as she searched, wondering if any of them were going to jump out at her. Bubblegum, vanilla, strawberry, coconut almond, triple chocolate, green tea, lemon custard…

 “Kyoko, are you okay?”

 ____________________________

 Okay, Makoto gulped to himself. The million-dollar question is out. 

 She turned to look at him, her brows knitted in confusion at the question. Her eyes seemed to be scrutinizing his face, drinking in every last detail. How funny it was that the two of them were spending so much time observing each other to excessive degrees. “What do you mean?” 

 “You’ve been acting weird since this morning,” he admitted, shrugging his shoulders, “It’s like you’ve been on and off perfectly normal, and then really frustrated. Some of the others noticed it at work today, too. Komaru was pretty worried about you. She said you asked to talk to her about something and seemed flustered. Said she couldn’t tell me exactly what happened, but that you were worried about hurting my feelings. Is something going on?”

 His partner cursed under her breath, and for a second he thought he’d heard his little sister’s name thrown somewhere in there. She began to nibble on her lip anxiously, her gaze darting away from him. He probably shouldn’t have brought up that he spoke to Komaru at all.

 “Did I do something, Kyoko?” 

 A balloon of pressure built inside of him as he stood there waiting for her response. His heartbeat danced in his throat. Whatever was wrong with his girlfriend, he was sure that they could manage to get through it, but only if they communicated. Otherwise, they risked never being able to find the right pieces to reach their happiness. Then where would they be?

 “It’s…” 

 “It’s…?” He parroted, reaching out to grab her hand. She moved it away from him almost like she was flinching, sending a pang of sadness through his heart. He really hoped this wasn’t going where Komaru said it wouldn’t.

 “It’s not something you did, Makoto, I just…”

 His hand moved to rest on her arm, at the very least. Though he didn’t feel he had the energy within him to do so, he cracked a small grin. “Whatever it is, you can tell me. We’re a team. We’ve got to work through this stuff together, you know?” 

 Kyoko’s cheeks burned like brand-new Christmas lights, her gaze still fixated anywhere else but his face. Her words seemed to catch in her throat as she uttered them, somehow too embarrassed to speak her mind. “Do you promise me that you won’t be upset if I tell you the truth?” 

 Oh no. Fear settled into him faster than he thought possible. She wasn’t going to confess to having done something totally wild, was she? She hadn’t grown bored of him, or decided she’d be happier with a smarter, better-looking man? He didn’t think crushing his heart in public was anywhere within her character, but she’d surprised him before. Sweat dewed on his palms; he wiped it off on his work pants as best he could. “Uh… I’d like to think I could do that for you, yeah,” he replied, cringing at his anxiety showing in his voice, “So long as you didn’t like… I don’t know, plan to murder me and then decide last minute you didn’t want to go through with it.”

 It was a bit of a joke, but neither of them laughed. Not that it mattered. He got the feeling that the two of them just wanted her to spit out her confession already. 

 “It’s nothing like that, I just…” Kyoko’s hands curled into her fists, her eyes squeezing themselves shut. “Makoto, you were saying this morning that today is such a special day, and that you were really excited about what was going to happen… but I don’t remember why today is important.”

 The murmuring of “oh” came out of his mouth before he could process it, blinking slowly as the cogs turned in his mind. So his girlfriend wasn’t mad at him, nor was she leaving him for a superior specimen? She was just… feeling ashamed because of a mistake? Because she hadn’t remembered why the day was important? She crossed her arms over herself for protection, not realizing that a relieved laugh brewed in his chest. Oh, how he’d worried over nothing! He found himself grinning within seconds. Without thinking, he leaned over and pressed another kiss against her forehead.

 “Oh, Kyoko. Have you been beating yourself up about this all day?”

 “I’m sorry. I’m a horrible girlfriend.”

 He laughed and shook his head, giving her arm a supportive squeeze. “No, you’re not!”

 “Yes, I am. I completely forgot everything that’s supposed to be important about today, and I tried to ask Aoi, Komaru, and Togami-kun to get them to tell me, but they didn’t know either. I thought maybe by coming here with you and seeing what you were buying would give me some clues as to what our plans are, but I’m just more confused. Half of these are snacks, and the other half are just random items,” she reached into the box and pulled out a container of shampoo, “Seriously. What does this have to do with tonight?” 

 He chuckled awkwardly. “It doesn’t have anything to do with tonight. We just needed more shampoo. Same thing with the hand soap and sponges and all that. Picking up the snacks was the main goal. I’m going to make those caramel popcorn bars for us to eat, and it’s been awhile since we had hiyoko cakes, and you asked me for nachos when we first planned tonight…” 

 “But you only ever make the popcorn bars when we have Dead Trial marathons...” She muttered, her eyes suddenly lighting up like she’d struck a match. To his surprise, she actually gasped, taking hold of his arm. They must have looked so silly, grasping onto each other like that. “The new season gets uploaded to Flickies tonight, doesn’t it?! Is that why today is special?”

 Finally, he let himself have a full, hearty laugh. “Yeah! Since you’ve been so busy lately, I figured you must have been holding out for it and doing all that work to make sure you could enjoy yourself once it got uploaded. I didn’t realize you’d forgotten about it entirely.”

 “So I’m not a terrible girlfriend?”

 “Far from it! Just a girlfriend who worked so hard that she forgot about a special TV bingeing night.” 

 She exhaled with relief, her hand hitting her chest. “I’m so glad.” 

 “You must have been really worried, huh?”

 “Of course I was,” she murmured, rubbing his arm in what he assumed was supposed to be some form of affection, “I was certain that I would be hurting your feelings by forgetting, and I’m sure you know that that is the last thing I would ever want to do.”

 “Yeah, I know. Still, Kyoko, I promise I wouldn’t be mad at you if you really had forgotten something important. I know you’ve got a lot on your mind most of the time, and you’re only human. Anybody’s bound to forget stuff. It’s just how people work.”

 She blinked softly at him, staring up at him with the most loving gaze that he’d ever received from him. It was as if he could see the stars in her eyes. “Really?”

 “Of course,” he assured her, “I don’t need you to remember every little thing to know you love me.”

 She sighed, throwing her arms around him and pulling him into a hug. Makoto’s heart began to beat faster as she pressed her face into his shoulder, snuggling in close. He couldn’t stop himself from breathing in her sweet smell, enjoying the cherry blossom-scent. “You’re too nice to me, Makoto, you know that?”

 “Well, you deserve it.” He murmured, holding her as tightly as he could manage. It felt so good to be in her arms.

 Kyoko snickered. “You’re such a flatterer.”

[our-wargame]

I’m No Angel, I’m Just Me

Rating: G Pairing: Oda Sakunosuke / Dazai Osamu Major Tags: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, CAREFUL; Ango’s a Hero Summary:

Odasaku gets a box. A heart-shaped box of chocolates on Valentine's Day. Ango looks rather bored in comparison to his puzzlement.

"Who would send me-"

Ango stares at him like he can't tell if he's being serious or not. "Are you kidding me."

Alternatively: Odasaku is oblivious, Dazai is ridiculous, and Ango is a goddamn saint who deserves a raise.

Word Count: 2,432 AO3 LINK

It begins like this. He's just sitting at the bar with Ango, discussing the latter's latest reports on weekly finances, when the bartender speaks, "Ah, Oda-kun?" He raises his head. The bartender offers a small smile. "I had a special request to give this to you." He bends over his side of the counter and when he straightens up, he has a little box in red in his hands. It's a heart shaped box. In the mafia, Valentine's Day is a joke; Port Mafia has their own little running tradition/gag. Instead of giving gifts to the person you love the most, you send candy to the person you like the least. Every year without fail, Dazai gets two or three subordinates to help him lug the bags of Chuuya's treats to the bar. Ango and Odasaku will each take a single piece or two upon being offered, while Dazai pick out all of his favorites. Then he tells Odasaku to take as much as he can for the kids and then asks if he still has contacts with that orphanage in the west of the city.

That’s why he doesn’t really understand what's going on right now. The bartender passes him the box. The heart shaped box. Full of chocolates.

In comparison to his puzzlement, Ango looks rather bored.

"Who would-"

"You already know the answer to that," Ango rolls his eyes.

Odasaku raises a brow at him.  "What are you implying?"

Ango glances at him. Then stares, like he can't tell if he's being serious or not. "Are you kidding me," he mutters, pulling out his phone, jabbing at the buttons with a certain kind of ferocity and then says into it, "...Dazai-kun?"

"Ango!" Dazai's chirp sounds through the loudspeaker. "How are we doing on this fine-"

"Did you know," Ango interrupts, holding the phone out a few inches from him like it's toxic. "That Odasaku received some chocolates today?"

"Is that so? I'm not surprised! Even though Odasaku isn't very well known among the mafia, he is an attractive, thoughtful, and intriguing single man! It's too bad he isn't actively looking, because if women knew about him they'd be stumbling over one another to give him things, and I don't think either you or I could stand the jealousy!"

"Is that so," Ango says flatly, and then barrels on. "Well. We're trying to figure out who sent them but we could use some help. When are you coming by?"

Odasaku is sure he looks completely bewildered but tries to focus when they get a hum from Dazai.

"Another hour or so! I bought Chuuya a gummy bear as big as him and I'm trying to figure out where to put it..."

"Is that so." Ango looks bored again. "In the meantime, will you share your brilliant deduction skills with us, Mister Executive? Figuring out Odasaku's secret admirer is some tough stuff. I'm stumped."

"I'd be delighted, Special Intelligence Officer! What do you know so far?"

Ango yawns. "Not much. The note-" Ango pauses, as if he's remembering something; still, Odasaku sure doesn't remember there being a note? "The note has neat handwriting so it's probably a woman's."

"Huh. Just to be clear," Dazai sounds very careful, all of a sudden. "There's a love letter? With the chocolates? Addressed to Odasaku?"

"Yeah."

"Huh. This is...interesting." Dazai says, not sounding particularly interested. "Ah, I've decided I'll send Chuuya his gift tomorrow, for the surprise factor. I'm heading to Lupin now."

"Alright, see you soon." Ango responds, promptly hanging up and fixing Odasaku with a look. "Well?"

Uh. Odasaku raises a brow. "Could I get a translation. What was all that just now?"

Ango puts his head down. "What am I going to do with you, Odasaku-san." he mumbles, before clearing his throat and fixing his glasses. "Okay. So. It may come as a surprise to you, but Dazai-kun is the one who sent you the chocolates."

Odasaku blinks. "What?" Why would Dazai do that? He's pretty sure Ango's quite off the mark this time. In fact, now that he's had a chance to think on it, it's more than likely it's an odd choice of prank from one of the other errand boys.

"Trust me," Ango interrupts his guesses as to whom it likely is. "It's Dazai."

"Why would Dazai-"

"I heard my name!" And the man of the hour walks in, with a smile as bright as the sun. "Let me get a crack at this-" His gaze shifts to the box in Odasaku's hand. "Oh. Odasaku really is popular. Is that a second gift?"

Before he can speak, Ango says, "Dazai, he knows it's from you."

Dazai opens his mouth. Closes it. "Oh."

"Yeah."

"Huh." Dazai says, scratching his head. "How did you know?"

This feels like a very bizarre dream, and it might be, because putting aside whatever is going on, it seems like the rules say he just doesn't get to speak. Again, Ango answers for him. "I'm a Special Intelligence Officer, Dazai-kun. Anyways, better question: where are my chocolates?"

"Your chocolates."

Ango looks at Dazai like he's the crazy one. "Uh, yes? My chocolates? I thought you were giving them to all your friends?"

Dazai breaks out into a grin. "Of course, I was!" He reaches into his jacket. Ango is handed a candy bracelet. "A friendship bracelet, if you will!"

"...is this Chuuya's candy-"

"I was kidding!" Dazai says, reaching into his jacket again. "You're no fun, Ango." And this time he pulls a little box the size of his fist, white with a little brown bow over the top. Now Ango wears surprise as he takes the box and examines the entire package before taking off the top. Indeed, there are chocolates there.

"...huh," says Ango.

"I know you didn't get me friend-chocolates back," he beams at Ango. "But it is okay, because I love you no matter what, Ango!"

"Thanks, Mister Executive," Ango stands up. "If you'll excuse me, I need to use the restroom." He disappears in an instant.

Dazai signals to the bartender. "Boss, will you get me a coffee? I'll need it to wash Chuuya's crap down. I should probably eat some, just to show him I appreciate how we maintain our mutual distaste for one another, right, Odasaku?"

Odasaku thinks about answering but then vetoes the idea, decides to ask, "Did you really send this?" with a little gesture to Dazai's apparent present to him.

Dazai clears his throat. "I did! Now where are Odasaku's other gifts. We'll figure out who sent them to Odasaku and then maybe we'll track her down, the two of you will go on a date and then kiss kiss, fall in love." Dazai's smile doesn't look very Dazai in the moment.

Odasaku makes an awkward shrug. "Ah...I'm not sure what Ango was trying to say but he made that up. Maybe he thought it'd be funny, or something?"

"Huh. Dazai says, pressing his lips together. "Did he."

When Odasaku does the same, Dazai's look fades away to a reassuring smile. This one's more real than the other one, Odasaku can see. But it's still not real enough for his preference.

He glances at the box he's placed on the counter, halfway between them. "Thank you, Dazai." He says. "No one's made me friend-chocolates before." And even though Dazai seems to be good at everything he does, he still took time and effort to make a gift for Odasaku. It's...really really sweet of him actually.

"Ah. They're not..."

"They're not...?" Made? When he'd looked at them, he thought they had to be made from an amateur's mold equipment.

Dazai doesn't reply. And when Odasaku looks at him closer, Dazai shakes his head and his bangs fall into his face, hiding his eye for a second. Odasaku feels an impulsive urge to reach over and tuck those strands behind his ear.

Head still down, Dazai talks to the floor. "Will you try them?"

Odasaku blinks. In the middle of Ango's enormously confusing behavior, he hadn't considered the idea at all but now there's no reason not to. He pops the lid off and places it on the side, then picks up a simple semi-sphere piece and brings it to his tongue. And. Wow. "It's...it's really good." He glances at Dazai, who doesn't look as pleased as Oda is used to seeing in situations like this, considering the occasions where Dazai makes him curry or the three of them hotpot, and a compliment sends Dazai into his little show of mock horn-tooting. "How...how long did it take you to learn how to make these?"

"Not very long." Dazai gives him a soft smile- this, this is the one Odasaku likes to see. Wants to see more often. "It was fun learning."

Odasaku nods his chin to the box. Dazai, agreeable and good-natured, picks up a triangular piece with rounded edges. His has caramel or something filling it inside, because a bit of sunset orange leaks out of the sweet when he bites down. It spills onto his lower lip before he swipes his tongue and licks it back into his mouth. Odasaku doesn't realize he's staring until Dazai glances at him, almost curious. Odasaku blinks, then gives the box on the counter a little push towards Dazai, who shakes his head a little. "I shouldn't spoil my appetite. Since Chuuya tried to outbuy me again...the least I should do is outeat him, right?"

"Do you ever let him win?"

Dazai grins again and then conversation about even sillier things breaks out.

A few hours later, Odasaku's in his study room when he gets a call that fills the entire apartment. It's Ango. "Hi, it's Oda-"

"Yeah, hey, so, uh? What the hell?"

He pulls the phone from his ear. "What? Also assuming your bladder didn't burst, next time let Dazai and I know you have to go. We were wondering where you were."

"You-" Ango exhales. "Odasaku-san. I." There's a muffled crackle and then a distant yell, like Ango covered the microphone to shout to the void.

"Ango?"

"Right. You listen very carefully," says Ango, in a rush. "I'm very tired of watching Dazai pine. It's not annoying so much as it is pitiful and if you show that guy pity, he considers killing you, so that's not very fun for me. Also since he's going to kill me after what I did today anyways, I just want to say: Dazai has a huge crush on you. He's in love with you. Has been, probably since forever. Please deal with him. When I die, buy me a grave somewhere I can overlook the sea okay, and on the headstone, it should say: Man Who Put Up With Too Much Shit. If I'm still alive after 48-hours, we'll go to the bar and I'll buy you all the scotch you can drink. Do not call me before then because you should be dealing with Dazai and I will be trying to avoid the inevitable hitmen. Goodbye, Odasaku-san."

Odasaku only catches the first half of his call. Dazai's...Dazai's what?

Ango's wrong. Dazai wouldn't...not with him. He's pretty sure. Pretty sure...

He thinks about every elapsed second when they were in the same room together, the warmth in Dazai's eyes when they'd parted a little past nine, the way he walked in and looked at Odasaku like-

Oh. Odasaku's stomach drops out of his body. The more time he spends reviewing, the more things starts to make sense. He starts turning the tape of his memory even further- last month, Tuesday, the Thursday before that-

Oh.

And then. He comes back to today. Thinks about orange caramel, pink lips, a smile of starlight-  

Oh.

---------------------------------------------------------

Dazai's tired. Really tired okay. It's late and he's been working on a report that he actually planned to finish earlier. And it's been a long day. And last night, he stayed up kind of late to make sweets for people, including a friend (who no longer deserves to be named Such) and a silly guy who's as incredible as he is ridiculous and-

Bleh. This is getting gross. Frankly, he does not vibe with this.

So he pours himself a glass of milk and watches it go round and round in the microwave- radiation, what? -when his phone rings in the next room. The ringtone means it's Odasaku, he knows already, and thinks about pretending to be asleep. Doesn't really want to though, and so he takes the call, says, "Hi, it's Dazai."

"Are you busy?"

"Not really." Dazai drawls as best as he can. "Checking up on little lonely me, Odasaku?"

"Just wanted to make sure you were home."

A knock. At the door. Dazai turns and goes for it, working the latch lock at the same time he builds himself up for this. He pulls the door handle back. Odasaku stands there, filling the door frame.

"Hey," Dazai greets, smiling despite himself. "What can I do for Odasaku at this fine hour?"

"First of all, I've had to process a lot." Odasaku pauses. "And I'm as unused to expressing my shit out loud as you are, so fair warning but here it goes. I was going to try my hand at the making chocolates thing. I figured it'd show reciprocation? But it's even harder than I thought it was, and I didn't want to look like I don't care as much as you do." He puts his hand on the back of his neck, which Dazai has learned to mean equal parts sheepish and nervous- which in itself, rarely shows, but when it does, is Odasaku running a hand through his hair.

Of course, Dazai's not registering this at all. He's too busy trying to understand what Odasaku is saying, if Odasaku means...

"And I could learn and practice." Odasaku blinks at him. "But I didn't want to wait for White Day. I figured I've made you wait long enough."

Dazai laughs a little. Laughs a little more, and when he reaches for Odasaku's hand, Odasaku lets him take it, takes the encouraging pull for what it is and steps a little closer, still looking at Dazai like...Dazai is something he needs.

"Ango hasn't fully been pardoned yet," he tells Odasaku, after closing the door and leading them into the kitchen. The microwave shows the time. Dazai has a report to do that he minds a little less. "But I've decided I'll let Ango live a little longer. He's okay sometimes."

"Just okay?"

Dazai grins.

[petersasteria]

Red - Tom Holland

Pairing: Basketball Player!Tom x Reader

Requested? Nah

6k reads celebration on Wattpad x

Tom Holland Masterlist || Ultimate Masterlist

* * * *

Everyone is destined for someone and they're called 'soulmates'. You've always believed in soulmates and you've always dreamed what it would be like to meet them. You never really understood how the soulmate system works before, but as you grew older it wasn't that hard to understand.

You thought you were the only one with this problem, but it was completely normal. Your parents explained it to you when you were younger.

Apparently, everyone is born seeing all of the colors except one. It varies from person to person and it's like that, because it has meaning behind it. The meaning depends on how the said soulmates felt when they met. For your parents, they weren't able to see the color pink until they met. Pink means hope. It gives a sense that everything will be okay.

Your parents met each other at a mutual friend's wedding and coincidentally, they're the only ones in their group of friends that aren't married yet. But they're still hopeful. So they unknowingly went to the open bar together at the reception and when they made eye contact, they were able to see the pink flowers and pink decorations. They smiled at each other and they just knew.

Then of course, they got married and had your older brother, older sister, then you.

Your brother found his at the early age of 9 and your sister found hers at 16. Both of your siblings are now married and engaged and you're now 18 with no boyfriends, no flings, and no soulmate.

After a person meets their soulmate, they go to the soulmate agency to get matching tattoos to signify that they're each other's soulmates. The agency also sets up their date based on the information that the agency has on them. The agency then sends an e-mail to the newly found soulmates' families to inform them on the joyous occasion.

You found it a little bit weird that there's a soulmate agency to do all that, but that's life.

"Chad asked me to homecoming!" Y/B/F squeals. You roll your eyes and turn to her, "Well duh! He's your soulmate! It was bound to happen. Why are you so excited? It's not like he'll ask someone else to homecoming."

Y/B/F frowns, "What's wrong? You never have an attitude unless something's wrong. So, what's wrong?"

You sigh heavily and clutch your books to your chest, "My sister's stressing about her wedding and she's been such a bridezilla and as her maid of honor, I had to deal with her in planning! Her negative energy is rubbing on me."

"Well that's upsetting." Y/B/F giggles. "Anyway, I have to go. See you tomorrow!"

"See you tomorrow!" you call out to her. You then realize that you're the only person in the hallway and you make your way out of school to go home. Just then, someone bumps into you and you fall face first into the ground. Your books are scattered and the very important notes for your sister's wedding are flying away before you even get the chance to get them.

At this point, you didn't care about your books. You didn't want your sister to yell at you again so you immediately scramble to your feet and quickly grab the very few notes that are still on the ground.

"Watch where you're going!" a voice yells. "You're so fucking careless!"

This made you mad.

You turn around to see a boy and for some reason, both of you are experiencing headaches. You look at the boy and the basketball uniform that was grey, is now a very strong and vibrant color of red.

He looks at your grey scarf which is slowly turning red and his eyes widen in realization, "Y-You're my soulmate?"

You were about to say something but he cuts you off, "Ugh, I can't believe this! I can't believe I'm soulmates with someone who can't see where they're going."

"You're the one who bumped into me! If anything, you're not watching where you're going! You made me lose HALF of the notes for my sister's wedding!"

"Well if you stood up faster, you would've gotten all of it!"

"Well if you just paid attention more, you wouldn't bump into me and none of this wouldn't happen!"

"Mr. Holland, are you ready to go home?" both of you look at the man in front of you wearing a tux and he has a serious look on his face. He looks about 45 years old or older.

"I'm kind of in the middle of something here, Bernard." the boy next to you says. "I'm arguing with- with- I don't even know who the fuck you are!"

"Y/N Y/L/N." you snap. "There. Are you happy Mr. Tom Holland, member of the basketball team?!"

He rolls his eyes and scoffs, "I'd be happy if you weren't my soulmate. I've waited for my soulmate for YEARS and this is what I fucking get?! Fuck you, Y/N."

What he said hurt your feelings. It was an asshole thing to say.

"Well, it's not my fault, is it?" you say softly. "I'm just as disappointed as you are, but you don't see or hear me blaming you."

"Pardon me, sir. But if you are soulmates, you must go to the soulmate agency right away." Bernard interrupts.

"I'm not going anywhere with her!" Tom says in disgust which makes you hurt even more. Your own soulmate didn't want you. How depressing.

"But it's the rule. There's a consequence." Bernard says.

"What's the consequence?" you ask. Bernard shrugs, "I'm afraid no one knows, because no one dares to break the rule."

"How does the agency know that we've met, anyway? They're not here. How do they know someone is breaking the rule?" Tom challenges.

"Oh, they're here." Bernard taunts. "They're watching everywhere."

You and Tom couldn't help but feel scared and find that information creepy. Bernard continues, "So, shall we go to the agency?"

"Fine." both of you grumble in response. Both of you are now sitting in the backseat far from each other. You were sitting in silence when Bernard breaks it, "It's really nice to have a soulmate. It's great to know that you'll have a partner for the rest of your life without second guessing. You'll realize that soon."

The car stops and you look out the window to see that you're in front of the soulmate agency's building.

"I'll wait at the outdoor parking lot." Bernard informs as you both thank him and get out of the car. Bernard drives off and you and Tom look at the building.

"I can't believe we're actually doing this." Tom sighs, walking inside as you follow him.

"I can't believe I'm actually here." you mutter.

You both walk to the receptionist who immediately smiles at you, "Mr. Tom Holland and Ms. Y/N Y/L/N, correct? You met at 2:45 pm outside of your school and now you can see the color red."

You and Tom look at each other in shock. Bernard was right; they're watching everywhere.

"Um, y-yeah. Who-Who do we go to? What happens next?" you stammer.

"Go to the second floor. They're waiting for you." the receptionist smiles and nods at the direction where the elevators are. Both of you quickly walk inside the elevator and press the 2nd floor.

You arrive at the second floor and see only one person there. The second floor was weird. It's only a long hallway from left and right, the elevator doors open at the center of it, so you're greeted by the wall. You and Tom exit the elevator and begin to walk to where the person is. You reach the person and see a woman in her mid 20s.

"Tom and Y/N, I've been expecting you." she smiles and motions for both of you to sit on the chairs across from each other in front of her desk. "I'm giving you your matching tattoos which will be placed on your wrists just like everyone else. So, would you like to tell me why your colors are red?"

"What do you mean?" Tom asks.

"When you saw each other, you both saw the color red. Why is that?" she asks.

"I'm sorry, I'm a bit lost. I don't know what you're talking about. Does that have a meaning or something?" Tom is confused. He was interested in the thought of soulmates, but he wasn't aware on how it works.

"Red means anger." she shrugs. "So why were you both angry when you met?"

"I wasn't actually mad at him. I was just having a bad day. My sister's getting married and she's all bridezilla and she made me write down important notes for her special day." you confess. "Now half of those papers are gone and I can't even imagine how angry she'll be when I get home without those."

"I wasn't mad at her too." Tom sighs. "I got a D on my paper on history and I really worked hard on it. I got so mad and yeah... here we are I guess."

She grins, "Your matching tattoos will be paper, because that's what made you mad." She starts preparing her tools and does both of your tattoos. After some time, she finishes and smiles at the both of you, "You may now go to the 3rd floor where you can see each other's files."

You and Tom thank her and leave. Both of you look at your matching tattoos as you walk to the elevator.

"You know," you start. "I guess it's not that bad."

He shrugs, "I guess. Sorry about what I said. I was just so mad and stuff."

"That's okay. I'm sorry too." you both enter the elevator and press the 3rd floor. You arrive there and the third floor is the same as the second floor. This time, there are three people there. The one in charge and the soulmates.

As you walk closer, you can hear them giggling. Soon, the soulmates stand up and happily leave. The one in charge is a lady who looks 30. She motions for both of you to sit down on the chair that are next to each other in front of her desk.

"I've now sent an e-mail to your families and I've now set a date for both of your families to meet. Now, it says here that both of you strongly dislike Halloween. Why?"

"I've had a bad experience." both of you say at the same time and look at each other in shock after that.

"Well, let's give it a good experience, eh?" she winks. "Your first date will be on the 31st of October."

"Why so far?" you ask.

"Well, your files say that both of you are extremely busy and you're unlikely to arrange something."

"Okay, but why Halloween?" Tom asks.

"Like I said, it's to give you a good experience." she chuckles. "Besides, you might end up loving that day, when you go on a date together."

You and Tom stay silent, still not believing that this is all happening.

"Okay, you may leave now." she says.

"What happens after the first date?" Tom asks.

"You're free to do whatever you want, but you must stay loyal to your soulmate. You're technically dating at this point, but you have the freedom to officially ask her to be your girlfriend at any time after the first date." she answers.

"Why ask her to be my girlfriend after the first date? Why not before?"

"Normally, people ask someone to be their girlfriend after the third date and that's the formal way. But you have the freedom to ask whenever after the first date. Besides, you wouldn't have time for each other at the moment. That's why I set the first date on the 31st of October, remember?" she chuckles.

"Right." Tom nods. "Well, thank you." Both of you stand up from your seat and she calls out, "I'll see you again when you propose!"

-

"Bernard can drive you home." Tom says as you and him walk to the outdoor parking lot. You shake your head, "Nah, I'm good. I'll just walk home or catch a bus."

"Y/N, don't be silly. You're my soulmate now and I'll blame myself if anything happens to you." Tom blushes. You giggle, "Fine. Only because I don't want you blaming yourself for anything." You smile at each other and you both get inside the car.

Both of you sat close to each other and both of you knew that things will be different from now on and things will be alright now that you have each other.

* * * *

Thought I'd write a soulmate au but like it's super different from what you usually read sksks

Tagging my mutuals: @fanficparker @myblueleatherbag @sweetdespairbarnes @justasmisunderstoodasloki @tommysparker @marvelousell @lcvelyparkers @lovingsiriusoswald (thanks for helping me sis uwu)

[thehappiestgolucky]

/sends a gentle, supportive hug/ bad weeks are rough 😔✊

May I offer you some more crimson nails headcanons in those tiring times?

– Xero being curious about dream weapons (and being absolutely astonished the first time he sees Markoth summon a dreamshield)

– Nail sparring in their spare time (with training weapons, of course), gradually turning into more and more flirting

Also, im curious about your moth wedding/marriage headcanons (and the idea of dreambonds is so beautiful🥺🥺)

🥺thank you for the hug

I will happily accept some headcanon talk. It long as I maayyy have rambled a bit-

- So I headcanon that Xero has always been able to use magic to summon his weapons, but it is different from Markoth's dream weapons. In essence they function the same, but Markoth's has that flair and seemingly no limit compared to Xero - who if he exceeds his limit completely passes out barely breathing. Markoth, being far more skilled on magic thanks to his mother, can kind of just summon at will with no breaks and that will forever impress Xero.

- Funny thing? I genuinely headcanon that they never actually flirted with each other until way after they're both dead and vibing as dream ghosts. And even then it's Xero being a teasing sap making up for lost time. Instead of the sparring turning into flirty I see only two idiots mutually pining for the other whilst being unaware the other is doing it as well.

Ok so, might ramble a bit about the moth weddings as I have two interpretations of them - one for original world and one for modern au. It’s long so if you want to read it click the keep reading ^^

OG and Moth Marriages

Dream Bonds are essentially not only the wedding rings of a marriage but the entire meat of a moth wedding. You can have a big ceremony if you want or simple go to your partner and go "we married", the only thing that will make it definite is the Dream Bonds.

Moths take it very seriously, since their marriages have such a spiritual and emotional connection between the two partners. Moths have a lower divorce rate not because they always find the best partners, but because they only marry when they're 100% serious about it. So when Markoth proposed to Xero it was after a slowburn relationship as both made absolute sure that "yeah, this is who i want to call my own". The Dream Bonds are created by both moths, but should the moth marry a non-moth, it is the moth who creates it.

The Dream Bonds form to represent the partner is not chosen but created by the Dream Bonds itself, so even moths have no idea what symbol will be used. The symbols can range from anything, but are always different and unique to the wedding partners - the symbols simply represent the partner. The partners have to pick a shared location to have their Dream Bond and they usually pick areas with larger surfaces, such as the arms, chest or back. Markoth and Xero chose their right arms because they could hide it a little easier and brush it off as a tattoo, considering Markoth was the only moth working in the ranks of the knights.

The average moth wedding is pretty lowkey, though most of the tribe would attend in some fashion to congratulate the wedding partners. Moth weddings are very much an individual thing and the only set in stone tradition is, as repeated, the Dream Bonds.

Now Markoth's and Xero's marriage worked a little differently than the common moth weddings. Essentially tied into another headcanon of mine - PK didn't allow marriages or relationships amongst knights of his court. His reasoning was that the relationships would get in the way of their duties to the people and kingdom and make them less loyal to him. Isma and Ogrim, despite having and knowing each other's feelings for one another, didn't get into a relationship because of this fact. Markoth and Xero? They got married anyway. So most of the time they had to keep their relationship secret (though not from the Five Knights because they're all friends and they been knew) and that includes their wedding. Their marriage entirely consisted of them hidden one night swearing to forever be with one another holding hands, and the Dream Bonds appearing. Despite them having to be more lowkey about their relationship, Markoth and Xero still had plenty of time to be dedicated and loving partners.

Their Dream Bonds remain even after death, but they don't actually bring the two dead together. Essentially Dream Bonds are the absolute representation of the wedding partners feelings and connection to one another. The brighter and clear the Bonds are representing the partner links directly to the partners connection, love and trust with one another. It's why Markoth's and Xero's are pretty clear.

Modern Au

There are uh, a lot of headcanons going on in Modern Au that are my headcanons in general, but really shine in Modern Au lmao-

Headcanons relating to Xero's family, what PK and Radiance were like if they weren't at each other's throats and all the infection stuff didn't happen etc. So to keep it a little more concise and brief, I'm going to just talk about moth weddings and what Xero's and Markoth's were like.

Moth weddings in modern au work a little different, because Radiance is around. This time the Dream Bonds are created directly from her, whilst still functioning the same. Basically Radiance personally officiates all moth weddings. They're not as common because she needs to spare time to them, but she is there for every single one.

Moth weddings don't have vows but more the wedding partners making a statement of love. Ramble about how much you want to grow old and die with your partner hand in hand? Hold your partners hand close and give them a kiss to show you love them so much? Gently caress their face? All of those count. Everyone has different ways of expressing love and really Radiance can tell of you're serious or not. Which is why she's there for them, she acts as a guiding light should any of the partners have less than good intentions for marriage. She'll then personally investigate the bad partners dreams to see what's up and guide the good partner about how to handle it. All in the privacy of dreams. Being a goddess do have its upsides.

Markoth and Xero's wedding got to be a lot more open with family members around, considering this Au PK doesn't have the same rule of knights not being in relationships (also Markoth this time just works in a little family run shop and is perfectly happy there whilst Xero works as one of the King's knights). Their marriage still played out similar, with the Dream Bonds being made after holding each other's hands and simply pressing their foreheads together swearing their love for each other. The biggest difference being is that they didn't have to hide anything and could be as romantic as they wanted.

[alphaketoglutaricacid]

@onehithero said: also we know theres at least some actual animals besides gadoll liek the scorpion n cows tht show up for a sec in ep 1 so tankers hav tht going for them re: food sources ..SORRY FOR RAMBLING SO MUCH deca dence essay got sleeper agent activated

onehithero said: i rly like what usaid abt kabu from natsumes pov too but i cannot form a half cohernet thought abt tht one

onehithero said: ALSO ALSO i think its interesting how the ep 8 conversation w minato is i think the only time kabu talks abt being jealous of humans being able to choose their own paths

onehithero said: also how minatos convinced hes like a good lil cog in the machine yet hes done 50 things tht wuld get him labeled as a bug but he just ignores all tht. the both of them can be so disconnected w reality

onehithero said: like minato didnt know abt 1)natsume 2) how the system has made kabu so severely depressed n he culdnt put up w it anymore.n minato continues pushing the just go along w the system shit he doesnt understand tht he was contributing to kabus misery.. n bc of tht kabu doesnt trust minato enough to tell him abt natsume for so long but then he goes n asks smth so big of him as go against the system

onehithero said: thinks abt how kabu n minato r obviously so important to each other but minato understands him less n less over time & kabu kinda already knew its risky to confide in minato like minato did know abt pipe which was a long time ago but he didnt know abt natsume til kabu was already sacrifing himself for her sake. n yet kabu then goes n tries to get him on his side anyway cuz he wants tht so badly..

onehithero said: OMG OMG CHEWS THESE WORDS SLOWLY N THROUGHLY SO DELICIOUS THANK U THANK U u get it u understand i love reading n writing essay lengh responses abt deca dence & again u just hit the nail on the head w this

Please let me know if this @ u 8 times and sorry if it did.  I will reply under this readmore but i love this enthusiasm! I like discussing this stuff so if u want keep it coming. I wanna understand deca dence better and i think i will by sharing ideas w other ppl. 

I think kabu and minatos relationship  is as good as it is because theres clearly a lot of mutual love and respect between them even when they don’t understand each other and thats why minato still runs after him when he hears kabu going suicide mission lets go baby. I think its interesting that minato was like ready to lie down and accept getting mass scrapped until he hears kabu go im about to be hilarious and hes like actually living and staying alive sounds great actually forget what i said about it being over.   you are so right about kabu and trust and natsume. I will always cherish episode 5 where kabu gives this big rousing speech about how natsume inspired him and saved his life and minatos there like ..who? ..what?? I think they may not be used to hiding things from each other. Also I think them drifting apart mirrors natsume and feis drifting apart tho I think while feis the instigator on that side kabus more on his side and minato like natsume is like wondering what in da world is going on. I think someone else wrote about this better than I can.

I do think minato does know kabus severely depressed because theres this line in ep 4 where he puts his hand on kabu and says like you’ve toiled enough at that awful job. and also in episode 11 when he and kabu talk and kabu says he was in a similar place as minato now in that he was waiting every day to be scrapped minato has no reaction until kabu says but that bug saved me. I think he knows kabus very depressed but he does not know how to address it cuz the system never gives either of them the tools or options for it. Though also I feel the system discourages meaningful relationships between the cyborgs so I think what minato and kabu have is likely pretty rare. Kabu donetello and turkey also fought together for a long time but turkey turns on donetello in a second even tho they fought together, he was his number two, and they were in prison together, and were pretty much all they got and donetello kills him in turn. I also think minato probably knew because he’s empathetic. Like I’m not sure about compassion but he’s very good at understanding where other ppl are and how to meet them in the middle so both parties get something they want. That’s how he got all the gamers to collect the old deca dence parts. Not by cashing in on ppl doing the right thing but by framing it as the final mission. He gets his lgbt community center coworkers for fight with him one last time by appealing to their sense of duty. He got the system to put kabu in jail instead of getting scrapped when Mikey got scrapped for a lesser offense. The list goes on. A tangent but I think the fact he acknowledges the living conditions of the humans are gonna get worse if nothing’s done even tho he’s apathetic at best towards them shows even when the system tries to mold the cyborgs into the roles it wants, sometimes the traits they have just keep on going despite themselves. I’m gonna stop myself before I go into jill and this theme but I’m gonna talk about it someday. So I think its more likely than not he knew but he didn’t know how to navigate around it also because it’s heavily implied he’s going thru the same thing and I think kabu might genuinely have no idea Bc kabu lacks empathy but his heart... is huge. When he hears minato express his feelings of not knowing what he wants he instantly tries to reach out and explain minatos not alone in what he feels. This is why they’re good foils. while kabu moves past where he was in the start where he states he does not intend to oppose the system and his compliance while also trying to do the bare minimum drives him to suicide, and finds the willpower and a reason to live and rebel against the system through his connection to other people (first natsume , he hangs out w kurenai sometimes too, and then with the jail robots). Meanwhile minato whos stuck in his literal ivory tower (it’s a Metaphor) never makes any of these connections. It’s the irony of kabu working at a armor repair job giving him some ability to connect w others vs minatos higher position isolating him from everyone else. I think kabu living amongst the ppl he harmed drove him to give up on life quicker, while minato being far apart shielded him from rlly having to see the effects of his actions I think he was headed a lil slower in the same direction. I think we’re led to believe minatos okay where he is but I think towards the end it’s clear minato has spent most of the series also in a bad place. I think he views things very similarly to kabu in that he wants to use what power he does have to protect the ppl he cares about similar to how initially kabu tried to just convince natsume to quit several times and he was like whatever at the rest of the humans who are natsumes comrades dying but he chooses to put it all on the line and try for some systemic change when he sees natsumes determination to fight. Also I think minato holds very little loyalty to the system cuz he doesn’t only like breaks 1000 rules for kabu (the hypocrisy) but he also looks the other way a lot. For example, when he overheard the top rankers talk about limiters he’s like I’ll pretend I don’t hear it also turn on private mode next time and he doesn’t berate them for considering cheating. Also donetello has been using an illegal avatar to climb to S rank again (isn’t it interesting that even after the ranked system is abolished something similar took its place). And his avatar looks the same as it did when minato worked with the guy. There’s probably like not that many ppl in s rank. And he calls himself donetello. Minato knows he’s supposed to be in jail but does he tell anyone? He’s like well.. that looks like someone else’s problem if they notice *goes and vapes* it’s so funny how little minato cares but it’s also not funny Bc some of minatos cruelest actions and things he’s complicit in are born not outta malice but apathy to everything. I think it shows (tangent number 4?) how the systems use of excessive force is counter productive cuz neither minato nor kabu are willing to report anything to disrupt the order Bc neither of them think the level of punishment is warranted. I also think that minato is probably the first person kabu really opens up to about why on a personal level he feels the system needs to be destroyed after Ep 7 is really interesting. It really speaks to how deep their [mutual and not platonic relationship I don’t know how to label ] is. I also think that he admits to minato that he envies human is rlly interesting and would like to hear what u have to think! I think it’s interesting that what really sets minato off is kabu saying he wants to choose for himself and also wants other cyborgs to have that freedom and I think it’s one of the few times we see minato get genuinely angry and have it not stem from worry. Tangent 5 I’m really extrapolating here but I think it’s very likely given how high up minato is that he likely knows of several cyborgs that rebelled against the system for similar reasons as kabu and knows how it ends and I think it probably feeds into his defeatist attitude. I think his role in the system must really kill whatever grasp of whatever minato has cuz he constantly has to act like it’s almost the end of the world and he’s strapped for resources all the time for like decades and decades of having to fake that type of desperation to entertain ur player base and cuz ur also on tv to entertain the general populace to distract them from their soul sucking jobs. I think that’s gotta mess with his perception of himself and also his ability to see that struggle as real and genuine. I think that’s also gotta be hard cuz he seems like out of his whole fuck we r under attack persona he seems like he’s a lil closed off but generally chill and somewhat upbeat to ppl who know him and he just wants to be isabella from animal crossing. I got really off track here. I think what really gets me is their relationship is built on knowing each other so well and so long , and how it’s managed to survive and persist through all this tragedy. They really mutually respect and love each other and that’s why kabu let’s minato walk away from his revolution even tho it compromises everything he works for. It’s why minato ultimently accepts kabus willingness to die for a tanker even tho he really doesn’t get it at all and it means it’s goodbye forever. But it’s still not enough to save either of them. Minato can’t save kabu from trying to passively starving himself to death and I’m not sure if kabu even knows where minato is at mentally. Sometimes no matter how close u are to someone there r things u miss and things u can’t help each other with. Even tho the two resolve to fight and then die together cuz this seems like the best choice Bc the system they were born into offers no alternatives, the deca dence doesn’t even activate without the help of other ppl. I think it shows one relationship cant support all that weight. In the end it is through their bonds with other ppl that gets them to an ending where they both survive when they decided alone their only option is death. Also u are so right about the other animals existing I totally forgot ty I cannot believe I forgot about the scorpion which calls to natsumes hairstyle which is a visual gag on how natsumes a bug and how like a scorpion, although unassuming, and fucking kill u, just like how her trying to get her boss to open up eventually leads to the whole thing toppling down. I also have a lot of thoughts about natsume but I’m still thinking of them and thinking hard Bc sometimes she becomes kabus inspiration Pinterest board and I don’t like that. When she shines she really shines but it starts getting sloppy towards the end so I have to think a lil longer about it. Okay I’m done. Also it’s kinda hard for me to look like I’m agreeing to ur points and nodding in this format but I really appreciate ur thoughts and will try to convey this. Maybe by formatting as a response to each of ur replies next time

[coffeebeannate]

Taken from @werebearbearbar

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 favorite works (fics, art, edits, etc.) you’ve created this year and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you’ve brought into the world in  2020. If you don’t have five published works, that’s fine! Include ideas/drafts/whatever you like that you’ve worked on/thought about, and talk a little about them instead! Remember, this is all about self-love and positive enthusiasm, so fuck the rules if you need to. Have fun, and tag as many fellow creators as you like so they can share the love! <3

I started writing fic years and years ago. And have done so in other fandoms before taking a long hiatus from the writing world in general. I stuck with written roleplay only. For  what I assume to be around four or five years, I did not write a single fic. (I also wrote short stories in childhood, teen years and young adult years)

(I want to point out though that this absolutely does not negate roleplay writing, and that writing with another person, or in a group is a lesser form) My break from fanfic came with one of the worst periods of my mental and physical health, and everything I had written was purged from my Ao3 account in a single night.

I started writing for The Old Guard in August, and below, are the things I like a lot that I’ve written for it. To do this, I decided to use the criteria of ‘fics I like the most’ instead of what seems to be the most popular to read. For me, if I really love a piece of work, I recall the creative process fondly, and have lines and bits of dialogue I truly adore within it.

1. Precision Mission Fic. Gala. Post-Movie. Current Group (Nile, Andy, Joe, NIcky)

Rated  M (Mature) 4846 words

My second fic for the fandom that I published, but the first I actually conceptualized. This one is just..so special to me. I have phone notes typed at five am. I can recall the excitement as I was so eager to share this story and get it off the ground. I wanted to see this complete so bad. I loved nearly every second of writing it, and it’s always going to hold a special place in my heart as a result. There’s so much overdone clothing talk and I can only think of it with fondness. 

Excerpt:

None of them are comfortable. Except Joe, it seems.

Joe makes it look easy. Simplistic, even, judging by the way he effortlessly glides and charms his way through the expansive ball/congregating/entertaining room. Something that never failed to fascinate Nicky was the way Joe could integrate himself almost seamlessly into any scenario, situation, or environment. Neither Andy nor himself had that ability. Not when it came to cavorting, anyway. Nicky more quietly reserved, Andy lacking in the ability to care enough to fake it.

Nile seemed to be more in the middle. She did not appear overly comfortable with the mingling, but she had enough personal grace and adaptability to make it seem somewhat effortless to have a decent time.

All their eyes remained sharp on the surrounding area, awaiting the arrival of their target. And for all his schmoozing, Nicky knew Joe’s surveillance was tack-sharp, multitasking to a degree no one he was currently conversing with could have possibly noticed.

“You going to move at some point, or have you taken up permanent resident status here?” Nile asks, appearing at his side where Nicky has spent the last half-hour molded to the furthest left corner of the solid black bar. “I know you have an excellent view, but.”

Nicky snorted, though only Nile could actually tell, “Why waste a good opportunity?”, momentarily ceasing his Joe watching to stare back into the depths of his glass, which currently contained some horrifically shocking pink abomination, Nicky’s second drink, since he was letting the bar tender dictate them, too utterly distracted to care what was touching his lips, and curious with the way the bar tender had delighted in being given free reign to make whatever he desired.

To be fair, it didn’t taste that bad-something frighteningly sugary and weirdly noxious smelling, but it’s not exactly ‘crime against humanity’ levels of alcoholic nightmares.

--

2. Old

Post-movie. Current Group. (Andy, Nile, Joe, Nicky) Mortal Andy. Character study.

Rated T (Teen and Up Audiences), 2903 words.

My first attempt at Andy-centric writing. Andy is a character I consider a challenge to write, and that makes me want to write her more. This fic centers mostly around her and the others trying to come to terms with how much has happened, within day to day life and taking the comfort that they can in one another.

I really like this fic. A lot. Sure it’s short. Sure maybe not much happens, but Andy’s character fascinates me, as does her relationship with her family.

Excerpt:

Old.

Old

Old

So motherfucking old.

Someone is calling out to her, her hearing and senses long fine-tuned to knowing. It’s Nicky- she can easily pretend she can’t hear him, he knows when she doesn’t want to talk to anyone, after all.

She’s being petty, and she knows it’s unfair. That the nearly untouched plate and nights spent not sleeping gives them reason to be at her. But facing them with that fact feels about as ideal as jumping into a flaming volcano right about now. They’re just worried. It makes her stomach turn, sour and vicious. Venom in the gut, acid in the heart.

Said volcano would be kinder.

--

3. Spice it Up (Or Not)

Joe and Nicky. Pre-Movie. Fluffy Lovings

Rated: E (Explicit) 3030 words

This one was just fun. I am such a sucker for banting, and the most established of established relationships that Nicky and Joe have going on. This one is indeed not safe for work, and honestly, the opening paragraphs are what came first, and I actually had to build the story around it.

Something that I think makes this fic fun to me as well is that, just because something that sounded like a good idea fails, it doesn’t make it an ending. Healthy communication, knowing each other..it’s so blissful to think about.

Things aren’t always perfect, but that’s okay. And it’s not always a threat. Oh and because this is me, what was supposed to be fairly light hearted gets all sappy and reflective mid-way.

Excerpt:

He knows Nicky in every way. He knows his scent from battle, from sex, from showers and from sleep. He knows his eyes in darkness, in light, in dread, excitement and worry. He knows his grief, his love, his sadness, and adoration. Excitement, passion, fear, and pain.

He could count each tear that Nicky has shed, could recall each tone of his voice in every language they know. From the first he heard to the current. The sweet harmony of song and the rough gasp of drunk intoxication. He’s heard him yell, heard him scream. Heard his shouts and his cries.

He knows how Nicky tends to favour his left shoulder even though there’s no reason beyond psychological to do so. A spot Joe stabbed so long ago. So far back in another life. He knows how he likes to pause and do surveillance before they enter any new location. Knows he likes vehicles that move fast and has a fondness for roller coasters.

He’s seen those hands, so large and skilled break bone, wield a sword and cut vegetables and fruit. Seen them card through his hair, felt them map out each knot and ridge in his spine and ribs, felt them so deep inside himself he can taste it. Rolling into it. Demanding, needing.

“Yusuf.” Nicky’s not calling him back, Nicky’s just as far gone. So often they seem to share thoughts.

Nicky knows Joe in all ways and more. Knows that Joe still sometimes seems to speak ancient by-gone languages in his sleep. Knows that he tends to carry the strongest personal scent in the dead of night. That no shower, no soap, no life experience or battle has truly ever masked the delightful musk he has to himself. There could be a cologne out there that would modify it, and Nicky would bite and lick it away. Demanding and asking, why take this from me? How dare you try to alter what I know and love so furiously?

--

4. Touch Before Heart

Historical Kaysanova. Early Years. Pre-Movie. Getting to Know Eachother.

Rated E (Explicit) 5030 words

As is pretty obvious by now, I write a LOT of early years Kaysanova. A lot. I am addicted to it.

This one..I love it. This might be one of my favourite pieces of writing of all time. If I was doing these numbers strictly in order preference, then I’d put it as number one I bet.

I think the summary I made for it sums up well just how much I love it. And maybe why.

The first moment they’re able to have a bath, they resolutely do not look at each other. Picking opposite ends of the small stream bed, backs turned to one another. A strange show of both trust and distrust; their backs were exposed, but it was up to their tentative mutual agreement to not partake in the opportunity to stab each other for it.

The..idea that they had so much to learn, so much to understand. So much confusion, anger mistrust..I just really really adore this fic and I think I did a good  job with it.

Excerpt:

He curses in unison with Nicolò, both holding fast and steady as the thing finally rights itself, Nicolò letting out a slow, shaken breath of relief.

“Are you alright?” Yusuf asks, both to break the silence and mend the irritating gap they’ve created for themselves.

“Better. Thank you.”

Yusuf wants to scream.

He wants to grab Nicolò, shake him until he can do nothing but give him answers.

Why do you drive me to the brink of madness?

Why do I know your touch, but not your heart?

Why do you tempt me, consume me?

What does it mean?

Why are we here?

Why!?

It is an unfair desire; he’s hardly given the man any more clarity.

--

5. Curated

Post-Movie. Current Group (Nile, Andy, Joe, Nicky)

Rated G (General Audiences) 1807 words

Alright, I admit it, I had trouble picking number five. I picked Curated because it’s just..so fluffy. But it’s so sweet I always feel so sugary when I think of it. The softness that I tried to convey, and I think I succeeded.

Nile is another character that fascinates me, that  I just do not explore enough, and this is all the comforting goodness I could ever hope to create.

Excerpt: 

She’s grown used to the easy intimacy they all share, but the sight before her, Nicky’s eyes half-lidded, face a perfect serenity she rarely see’s on it, Joe lost, far-away in reciting but still wholly present, creates an odd, near-throbbing ache in her chest. Something powerful and raw. It’s hard to imagine that people who have been alive this long can be this content.

Everything they’ve seen, experienced and done. All the stories they’ve regaled her with. All the prep, the anxieties, the concerns, and curiosities. None of it seems to exist in these moments. Joe speaking in a language the world might think dead, the true master of softness within the room.

--

And there we have it! I have so much more I want to write, I have so much more I want to explore, and I thank you all for sharing in these journey’s with me. May there be more writing in our future!

[olicitysecretsanta]

Work-Life Balance

For @v4l13. I thought you might enjoy a workplace friends-to-lovers AU, with some mutual pining thrown in. 

From: @laxit21

Tags: AU, friends to lovers,

Oliver listened intently and nodded along as his coworker Felicity Smoak explained the new updates to the computer systems to him. He didn’t understand half of what she said, but pretended like he did. It was a computer, how difficult could using it be? All he did was data entry anyway, so as long as Excel still worked, it didn’t matter what knew programs and security measures they’d added.

He didn’t tell Felicity this, of course, because if he told her that he didn’t need to know this stuff, she’d leave to go talk to the other employees. He didn’t want her to leave his cubicle just yet. So, he listened intently as she babbled about the new programs and what they could do. He’d take any excuse to spend more time around Felicity. She was nice, and so incredibly smart, but she never made him feel stupid. She was also very, very pretty and he sometimes had a hard time focusing on what she was saying when they talked. She was amazing, and there was no way she’d ever have feelings for someone like him.

Oliver was so preoccupied thinking about how little of a shot he had with Felicity that he almost missed her wrapping up her speech. “That’s the spiel I’m giving for now, while everyone adjusts. If you need to know more about the functionality, send an email down to IT and we’ll get someone working on it.” She said. “Any questions?”

“I- no, not really.” He said. “You- your explanation told me everything I think I’m gonna need to know. Thank you Felicity.”

“No problem.” She said, crossing his name off of her list of people to talk to. “Okay, next is…frack!”

“What’s wrong?” He asked, suddenly worried. Was someone bothering or harassing Felicity? Why hadn’t she said anything before?

“Roy’s next on my list.” She said. “He’s nice but he’s not exactly tech savvy. Explaining how things work to him takes forever. Don’t tell him that I said that.”

He relaxed, happy that Felicity’s problem wasn’t very serious, and chuckled. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

“Well, have a good one.” She told him before walking off.

“Thanks, you too.” He said. He thought to ask her if she had lunch plans, but didn’t get the words out until after she was out of earshot.

Oliver first met Felicity on his second day at the company. He’d accidentally knocked over the latte he’d been drinking onto his keyboard. He called IT immediately after that happened, and Felicity was the technician they sent to look at it. After getting a stern lecture from her, he promised not to have coffee that close to his computer again.

The incident was the first of a few involving Oliver messing up something on his computer and Felicity coming to fix it. He used her visits to get to know her better and they became friends.

“Are you ever gonna ask her out?” Tommy asked, peering over the top of the divider that separated his and Oliver’s desks and snapping him out of his daydream. “Everyone knows you’ve got a thing for her.”

“There’s no way she’d be interested in someone like me.” He responded. “She’s a genius and I just play with spreadsheets all day because my dad thinks it’ll make me somehow want to take over the business.”

“Look, I’m just saying. You like her, she likes you, make a move before you miss your chance. Worst she can do is say no.”

“She can say no, and then run straight to HR and file a complaint. She’s my friend, I don’t wanna ruin it.”

“So, don’t be creepy about it.”

Felicity finished explaining the new software to everyone on the second floor before making her way back down to the IT department. A few other techs looked up at her before going back to work. Felicity went over to her desk and sat down.

“Explaining everything went well, I take it?” Lena Luthor, the only other woman who worked in IT, asked.

“I made the mistake of saving Roy for last, but I think he understood what I was trying to tell him.” She answered. Roy was part of the new business department and he was a nice guy, but as Felicity had mentioned, he wasn’t very good with technology.

“And what about Lover Boy?”

“Who- don’t call him that.” She said. “We’re just friends.”

“But you wanna be more.”

“Oliver Queen would never be interested in someone like me. Besides, his dad is our boss. There’s probably rules against that.”

“No, there aren’t. But if you wanna stay in denial, fine.” Lena said. “Just tell me when you’re gonna make a move so that I can bet correctly.”

“People here bet on other people’s relationships?” Felicity asked incredulously.

“It helps pass the time.” She said. She didn’t mention that the only betting pool was on when Oliver and Felicity would finally get together.

Before she could say anything else, a help ticket came in from Robert Queen himself. He’d somehow deleted his entire email program. Felicity and Cisco, another IT tech, went to Robert’s office to try and fix the issue.

The next day after lunch, Oliver went down to the IT department to see Felicity. She was sitting at her desk, typing quickly and he assumed she was busy. He turned to leave but she spotted him. “Oliver, hey. What brings you down here?”

“I was looking for you, actually.” He said. “I was wondering if…”

“Yeah?” She perked up. Was what she thought was going to happen about to happen?

“A bunch of us are gonna grab drinks after work if you wanna come.” He said. internally, he facepalmed. He hadn’t come down here to tell her this. He was going to ask if she’d have dinner with him, but standing in front of her, he lost his nerve. “I-uh, I wasn’t sure if anyone had mentioned it.”

The blonde deflated slightly and her smile became a little less genuine. “Yeah, I’ll come. Is this a special occasion or-?”

“Not that I know of.” He shrugged. “We were gonna head to Callahan’s.”

“I’ll meet you there.” She promised. He nodded and left, saying he didn’t want to keep her from her work any longer. “Get your head out of the clouds, Smoak. No way he’s interested in someone like you.”

Tommy was waiting upstairs for Oliver to return. He knew his best friend had gone down to ask Felicity out and wanted to be the first person to know how it went. Oliver stepped out of the elevator and walked over to his desk. His shoulders were slightly hunched over. This wasn’t good.

“Walk it off, buddy.” Tommy said, trying to encourage his friend. “What did she say?”

“I didn’t ask.” He admitted. Tommy sighed, and he wasn’t the only person who seemed disappointed based on the sound of others sighing behind them. “I just- I got down there, and I was talking to her and I just- I said a bunch of us were getting drinks after work. Any chance you can organize a happy hour in the next few hours?”

“Have you met me?” Tommy asked rhetorically. “Callahan’s, I take it?” His friend nodded, so he started typing out an email to a few of their work friends. “And hey, maybe at happy hour, you can make your move.”

“Yeah, maybe.” Oliver said, not truly believing it. He went back to work and didn’t notice that his sister, who was interning at the company for the summer, walked past his desk and into Robert’s office.

“He didn’t do it.” Thea said, closing the door to her father’s office behind her.

“He didn’t do what?” Robert asked, not really listening.

“Oliver, he didn’t ask out Felicity.”

While Oliver’s family agreed not to meddle in his relationships, they were getting a little tired of the “will they, won’t they” act between him and Felicity. He mentioned her a lot, and it was clear that he had feelings beyond friendship for her. It was also very clear that Felicity had feelings for Oliver. The only people who didn’t seem to see it was Oliver and Felicity.

“Thea, we can’t force your brother to do something before he’s ready. The situation with Isabel-.”

“It messed him up, I know, but you can’t- I want him to be happy. Don’t you?”

“Of course, I do. Why else do you think that, whenever Oliver breaks something, I request that she fix it? it’s because she’s the best person down in IT, but also because it gives them an excuse to talk.” He said.  Robert was getting just as frustrated with the back-and-forth between his son and Felicity as everyone else. He just knew that if he tried to rush Oliver, it would have an adverse effect.

Felicity, Oliver and about seven others went out for drinks after work. Of the people who came, only one Roy, didn’t know about Tommy’s plan to give Oliver and Felicity a moment alone so that they could talk, and hopefully, Oliver would ask her out. Drinks were ordered and people started talking. They split into groups and started chatting. Roy was about to ask Felicity a question, to try and get to know her better, when Sara grabbed his arm.

“C’mon. Let’s see if there’s finally someone who can beat me at darts.” She said.

“What?”

“You and me, dart competition.” She said, pulling him in that direction.

“So, how is Thea liking her internship?” Felicity asked Oliver after the rest of the group split up. Asking Oliver about Thea was a good way to get him talking and Felicity didn’t want to start babbling and ruin the conversation.

“She likes it so far. I’m starting to think that maybe Dad should start grooming her to take over and not me.” He said.

“Hey, the finance department is important. Without you guys, we can’t get paid.”

“All I really do is put things into Excel and write my dad a report saying what the numbers indicate.” He said dejectedly. His job was so easy a monkey could probably do it, and do it better than him.

“And that’s important to keeping the business going.” She said. “You shouldn’t be so down on yourself. You’re doing great.”

The conversation turned from work to Oliver asking Felicity if she’d read the book he recommended a few weeks ago when they bumped into each other at the bookstore. She had started it, but wasn’t done reading it yet. From there, they talked for a little while before people started to leave because it was getting late. Felicity saw the time and said she should leave as well. Oliver offered to walk her to her car and was about to ask her to dinner when Tommy called out to him. He’d left his phone inside. Felicity waved goodbye and got into her car while he was dealing with Tommy.

Laurel hit her boyfriend in the chest. “What was that for?”

“You ruined his moment.” She said. “What if he was about to ask her to dinner and then you interrupted?”

“That’s exactly what happened.” Oliver said. “It’s fine. She was gonna say no anyway.”

“No, she wasn’t.”

Over the next week, Oliver talked to Felicity more at work. They ate lunch together a few times. They had already been friends, but got closer over the following few days. As he got to know Felicity better, he became less and less nervous about asking her out. He started to believe that if he asked, she’d say “yes” to going on a date with him.

Then, his father hired a new IT technician. Robert had asked everyone to gather on the second floor so that he could introduce the new hire to everyone at the same time. The man, Cooper Seldon, seemed unremarkable to him at first. As everyone was dispersing after the announcement, Oliver noticed that Felicity didn’t seem happy.

“What’s wrong?”

“Cooper and I have…. a history.” She said.

“You go to the same school or something?” Tommy asked.

“Or something.” She said. They’d dated and when they broke up, she never expected to see him again. She didn’t want to see him again. She made an excuse to go back down to her desk and started hatching a plan to avoid being anywhere near Cooper as long as she could help it.

Down in IT, Cooper kept trying to get Felicity alone, and she managed to avoid that for several days. Their break-up had been ugly and she had nothing left to say to him. Having to avoid him, though, stressed her out a lot, and others, including Lena and Oliver could tell.

When Oliver saw Cooper walk past his desk one day, he squeezed the pencil in his hand so hard that it snapped. He couldn’t stand Cooper, but he couldn’t explain why. It was probably because everything with Felicity has changed after he got hired.

“I don’t like that guy. Something’s not right about him.”

“Have you told your dad?” Tommy asked. “If he’s up to something-?”

“I can’t do anything about it. I can’t ask him to fire someone just because I don’t like him.” Oliver said before getting back to work.

Felicity’s plan to avoid Cooper worked for about two weeks, until the VP of Sales had a problem with his computer. He asked for Felicity personally, and since Cisco was out sick, Cooper went with her to take a look at the system. After looking at the computer itself, she realized there was a problem with one of the wires.

“Cooper, can you reach down and reconnect them?” She asked him. She didn’t want to bend down under the desk when she was wearing a dress, which she currently was. Especially in front of her ex-boyfriend.

“I think you should do it. I don’t know what’s supposed to connect with what.” He said. “I don’t wanna mess anything up.” She would’ve believed him, if he managed to keep the smirk off of his face.

Not wanting to cause a scene, Felicity moved under the desk to reconnect the wires. It only took a second, but when she stood back up, Cooper’s smirk was even wider. The VP of Sales seemed completely oblivious and thanked them as they headed out.

“I hope you were paying attention because next time, you’re fixing the wires.” She said.

“Lighten up. it’s not a big deal.” He told her.

“Playing the “I’m new” card to get me to bend over so you can stare at my ass is a big deal.” She shot back. “And that’s never gonna happen again.”

“But that view was so enjoyable.” As he talked, Cooper’s hand moved closer to Felicity’s backside. He was about to squeeze it when his arm was ripped away. Unfortunately for him, as they were walking towards the elevator, Oliver was coming out of his dad’s office.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Oliver demanded to know.

“Relax. Felicity and I go way back.” Cooper said.

“Doesn’t mean you can grope her.” He said. He looked over at Felicity who looked like she was about to cry. “Felicity, are you-?”

“She’s fine. You gonna let go of my arm now?” Cooper asked.

“Is there a problem?” Robert asked, stepping out of his office.

“No, sir, there’s-.”

“He almost attacked Felicity.” Oliver said. “I saw him-.”

“Ms. Smoak?” Robert asked.

Felicity sniffled. “Can I- I’d like to talk with you and Cecile, if that’s okay. Alone.” She said. Cecile Horton was the head of HR at the company. Robert nodded and walked with Felicity to HR.

She told them about her past relationship with Cooper and what had happened earlier that day. As soon as she was done, Robert borrowed Cecile’s phone to call security and have Cooper removed from the building. He was fired and Robert vowed that he’d tell every one of his colleagues about his actions so that he wouldn’t be able to get a job with one of them.

Robert then turned to Felicity. “If you’d like to go home and take a few personal days, you can.”

“Thank you, Robert.” She said with a small smile. “I- I’m gonna go see Oliver before I leave.” She left Cecile’s office and walked to Oliver’s desk. “Hey.”

“Hey. Are you okay?” He asked. He had no idea what he was supposed to say or do here.

“No, but I think I will be.” She said. “I just wanted to- thank you. I can’t- I can’t believe he-.” She was trying very hard not to cry. She was better than that, but it was still so embarrassing and demeaning and she couldn’t make herself calm down.

“Hey, hey. Is it okay if I hug you?” Oliver asked. “You look like you could use one.” She nodded and found herself engulfed in his arms. “I’m so sorry that this happened.”

“No, I- I shouldn’t have-. I-.”

“No, this is not your fault.” He said firmly. “It’s all on him. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Felicity sniffled a few times before she pulled away. “Well, now that I’ve ruined your shirt with my mascara, I’m gonna go home.”

“Okay. Text me if you need anything.”

It took a few weeks after the incident for Felicity to feel normal at work again. Thankfully, not many people saw what happened, so she didn’t feel as exposed when she came back into the office, but Robert, Oliver and Cecile stopped by a few times to check on her and make sure she was okay.

A month after the incident, when Felicity was back to her smiling, happy self, Oliver took a trip down to IT again. He had wanted to ask her to dinner the day that Cooper was fired, but then the incident happened. He didn’t want to ask her so soon afterwards and make her feel uncomfortable.  Instead of nervously standing there, he knocked on the door and called out her name.

“Hey, so I was wondering if- will you go to dinner with me?” He asked.

“Yeah, I’d love to go on a date with you.” She said with a smile. “Wait, this is a date, right? I didn’t misread-.”

“It’s a date. I wanna date you.” He assured her. “Is Friday good?”

“It’s perfect.” She said.

Oliver went back upstairs and as soon as he exited the elevator, Tommy called out. “Okay, who had the 17th in the pool?”

“That would be me.” Thea said with a smirk. “Pay up everyone.”

Oliver and Felicity’s first date went well. As did their second one and every date after that. The “when will Oliver ask Felicity out” pool was replaced by a proposal pool, which Lena ended up winning. The proposal pool was replaced by a baby pool, which no one won because Robert told them they needed to stop gambling about their coworker’s lives. The day he ended it was the day after Felicity told him that they were expecting.

Robert retired after Oliver and Felicity’s son Lucas turned 1 and Oliver took over the family business. The night of Robert’s retirement party, Oliver turned to his wife. “Can I make a confession?”

“Yeah.”

“You know how when I first started, I had a lot of computer issues? Well, I might’ve messed a few things up on purpose so that I had an excuse to call IT.”

“I know.” She said with a smirk. “I never said anything because I liked having an excuse to talk to you.”