#anyway ramble over <3 /
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[Image ID below!]
[Image ID: A digital doodle-page of Professor Venomous, Lord Boxman, and Fink, drawn in a messy pixel style. The background is mostly grey with bright squares of pink, purple, and red scattered across it.
Venomous stands with his hands casually resting in his lab coat's pockets, while Fink sits on the ground next to him with paper and crayons. Many blank speech bubbles point from Fink as she excitedly rambles about her drawing. Venomous is not paying attention, staring off into the top right with a considering expression, faintly blushing.
The top right shows his thoughts. On the very right, Boxman is tackling Venomous in a hug while a bright explosions lights up the background. Boxman is squinting at the viewer with a smug smile. Venomous is catching him, also grinning evilly at the viewer, his snake tongue bit between his teeth. Both of their lab coats are splattered with blood. The top left shows Venomous' snake form, focussed on his teeth and curling tongue. Blood drips from his mouth. In the background, Boxman stares with a wide-eyed look of appreciation, pressing both of his pointer fingers together as he blushes deeply.
A cut-in panel in the bottom right shows Venomous covering his mouth with his hand, sweat beading his face as he frowns thoughtfully. Question marks float above him, surrounding a drawing of a box and a heart. /.End ID]
🐍
#guhhh i think about these two a lot........... mediumlong tags incoming/#ok ko#professor venomous#fink#lord boxman#myart#blood/#i Desperately need more angst with these two!! like there is so much POTENTIALLLLLL/#especially with the whole shadowy drama. like from boxman's perspective he woulda just snapped out of nOWHERE AUGHHH/#but nO!!!!! fluff first! i have a System! i gotta draw a doodlepage for everyone first- *then* we can get into the 20 page angst comics/#bc trust me i have So Many Things sketched down. it's gonna happen DFLKBNDFKLB/#anyway ramble over <3/
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So does anybody else ever think about how Loop felt the need to demonstrate that the party's deaths wouldn't have any effect on the loops. I know I do but that's besides the point. Anyway I don't think Loop actually needs to bathe, they just like to feel included.
#'but lucabyte didnt you already do a comic with this exact same message? that loop has potentially killed their party intentionally before?'#yes i did absolutely do that thank you for noticing. that is what the cannibalism comic is about. no that was not a metaphor. lol#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#sifloop#isat siffrin#isat loop#in stars and time fanart#isat fanart#lucabyteart#ill ramble elsewhere some other time. maybe in a text post. but. long and short of it: even if you assume the answer to 'how do they know'#is that in sasasap isa got frozen once. theres still the fact that the loops are from sif being too distressed. how far gone does a siffrin#have to be before they can witness a party member die and notice it has no effect. how does loop feel to have planned to kill the party#during act 3. why did they NEED to show sif that. are they trying to preemtively stop them from getting the idea in their head#that maybe that might work? when they're out of all other options? when they just get so frustrated and at wits end?#loop helps in subtle ways through the whole game. and in less subtle ways like begging sif not to use the dagger. and while yes the#overarching reason you need to learn that the loops are tied to sif is because you need to figure out wish craft.... loop doesn't know the#actual mechanics of the loops themselves. just what didn't work. the power of friendship. getting the final hit in. being perfect. etc...#and besides all that.. how did loop feel during that hangout. being so deceitful. especially since before the other shoe drops#sif is enjoying themselves. but they know what's coming the whole time.#as for: why bathing? its the obvious imagery for blood on their hands/washing/never being clean. and is a bit of an inversion of the other#piece i just drew with the other casual closeness and nudity being kind. this one is cruel instead.#anyway tag ramble over ill do a masterpost of all my fanwork with some directors commentary sometime i promise. since i know im often vague
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Snapshots of simpler times..
#hellooo been a while.. again#i was overwhelmed by finals but now I've been over two weeks off of school so you get a treat!!#i was feeling nostalgic and wanted to draw uniforms and this came to be#it's supposed to look like candid photos if it doesn't that's the fault of your lacking imagination /s#anyway i tried to improve on different things with each one so they're not really consistent but i tried my best#ignore how inconsistent my artstyle is you just gotta get used to it#the picture with sleepy tubbo is titled whittle boy in my heart <3#the first two are kinda related. tommy shot up the mess hall and had the month's cleaning duty cus of it#anyway i ramble too much here. it's good to be back tho! maybe I'll draw something else before the end of the year lmao#my art#dsmp fanart#cwilbur#ctommy#ctubbo#cniki#cfundy#lmanberg#fennec.art
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*rolls up 15 years late with Avatar the Last Airbender thoughts*
So I've been rewatching clips from the show lately to refresh my memory while I'm writing my Zuko Alone fanfic. And last night I rewatched the clip where Iroh teaches Zuko how to redirect lightning and I have had thoughts about this scene for years so I might as well finally throw them into the void of tumblr.
So, this scene is insane to me, because at the end of learning how he could-hypothetically- redirect lightning, Zuko looks at Iroh and, completely seriously says "okay I'm ready to try it with the real thing now". Like, Zuko, the boy with a massive scar on his face from where his father burned him just looks at his uncle and says, "shoot me with lightning".
And yes, he's 16 and not thinking but that's part of the point because the amount of blind, complete trust Zuko has in Iroh to look at him and say "shoot lightning at me" after the insane trauma he had at the hands of his own father- that is WILD to me. Zuko literally trusts Iroh so much that he just assumes, without even having to think about it, that no matter how volatile and unpredictable the lightning is, Iroh won't hurt him because Zuko cannot fathom his uncle hurting him.
And of course, Iroh's appalled because Zuko's standing there with a massive scar on his face from when his father misused firebending against him and likewise, Iroh cannot fathom hurting Zuko. And since IROH knows how volatile and unpredictable lightning is and how it could literally kill his son nephew he is absolutely NOT going to use it just to let Zuko practice redirecting lightning, but he's so flabbergasted that Zuko would even ask him that that he just kind of splutters angrily that he will ABSOLUTELY NOT shoot lightning at Zuko. (it's also just another layer of how messed up Ozai is because he shot lightning at Zuko without a second thought later)
But I hope Iroh thought about it later and realized the amount of pure, unthinking trust Zuko has in him because ;-; the child didn't even THINK about it. "Okay uncle shoot lightning at me now. I know I'll be safe because it's you." I love them so much 😭😭
#avatar the last airbender#zuko#uncle iroh#have literally had these thoughts rattling around in my head for YEARS#makes their reunion at the end of season 3 even more heartbreaking and sweet because zuko was so afraid#that iroh would be mad at him ;-;#the consequences of the crossroads of destiny really haunted him haha ;-;#their dynamic isn't even in my story I was looking it up just for lightning redirecting reference but the scene brought back thoughts#I love avatar it's one of my dormant hyperfixations that can become a current hyperfixation at any moment#which is. actually what's happened to me xD#this could potentially be relevant considering netflix is doing avatar tv show things now#but I doubt they'll do the subtext anywhere near this well#*writes an avatar fanfic 12 years after I first watch the show* 16-year-old me would go feral over the story I'm writing haha#anyway enjoy my ramblings
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i could take you (to have and to hold) | 3.6k
On Sunday, Eddie goes to church for the first time since leaving Texas. Here, he meets a priest with sandy blond hair and blue eyes and a smile that could put God's light to shame. This promptly sends Eddie spiralling into the confession booth, and Eddie splits himself open to bleed out over holy stone floors. He speaks Shannon's name into the darkness, and it doesn't bring her back to life, but it might revive Eddie. Because he says her name, whispers the two dreaded D words—death and divorce—and the world keeps on spinning for the first time since she'd written an apology into her eyes over the table at that rooftop restaurant. The world keeps on spinning before stopping all over again. Because Eddie goes to the cemetery, and he lets Shannon go. He lets her rest. And he shaves his moustache off. And he sits on his couch in his empty house and looks at a picture of Christopher and thinks I'm going to get him back. And then Buck texts him. Broke up with Tommy Beer?
(OR: commitment, faith, buck, things finally start to make sense for eddie) aka the handdelivered to @danielsousa fic <3
#sami rambles#me? writing? for the first time since june? apparently!#it seems i just needed to get very sick and have many big assessments looming over my head#anyway i actually kind of ate with thissssss ur welcome <3#911 fic#buddie fic#buck x eddie fic#buddie fanfic#buddie fanfiction#buck x eddie fanfic#buddie#buck x eddie
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Thinking about Eddie Munson who was complaining to the rest of the band about his shoulders and neck hurting post show. One of them convinces him to go for a massage.
Eddie shows up day of and is told to strip to level of comfort and get under the sheets laying on his back, his masseuse will knock before coming in. Eddie has not an ounce of care or shame, strips completely naked. Scars and tattoos on full display. He climbs between the sheets and waits. After knocking and hearing a "come in", his masseuse enters and-
The most handsome man he's ever seen walks in. A bit of stubble on his defined jaw, soft pale lips Eddie wants to kiss, big brown eyes Eddie wants to get lost in, slutty little waist and an ass Eddie could-
He introduces himself as Steve. Verifies where Eddie had said his tension was on the form he hastily filled out. Then it starts.
And maybe, maybe, Eddie is a bit touch starved. He could have anyone he wants, but they don't want him just his fame. Pushes them all away. Only gets close to his band, but they all are busy and have their own people outside of work.
And Steve is just touching him. Rubbing smooth circles into his temple, down his cheekbones towards his jaw. Pressing on parts of Eddie's face he didn't even realize were tense. It's relaxing.
And Eddie regrets not leaving at least his boxers on to help hide that he's becoming hard. Kind of embarrassing, which makes his dick harder- which, that's a lot to unpack right now-
"Hey, relax man," Steve says, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder. Eddie can see Steve's eyes dart towards the obvious situation," It's natural. Happens to the best of us." "Does it happen to you?" Eddie blurts out. Eddie wants to shove his face in one of these soft plush pillows and scream, but Steve just snorts a laugh and shakes his head at him. Doesn't even respond as he continues the massage.
Eddie tries to hold back his groans as Steve turns his head to the side and rubs his neck into his shoulders. He can feel the tension leave his body slowly. Feel the knots in his muscles release.
Eddie can't, however, hold back the noise he makes when Steve grabs a hold of his hair and tugs it. Eddie's eyes pop open and he stares into Steve's face, who has started blushing. Steve just clears his throat and let's Eddie's hair go before continuing the massage.
#Steve was just moving his hair and the intrusive thought won over and yanked Eddie's hair towards him#Eddie is waxing poetic in his head has already written a minimum of 3 songs about Steve and is now going to have Steve star in every fantas#Lol yall aren't gonna believe this i paused when typing 'Eddie is' and the suggested was to put 'Eddie is a gay disaster' asdhfdlsl#Anyways this was totally NOT inspired by me getting a massage (I've had many in the past) and this random masseuse grabbed all of my hair i#Their hand and then tugged it towards themselves which...has never happened before and I almost moaned so uh found something out about me#I was just like “OH???oh!” And then proceeded to melt into the table#That wasn't even the wildest massage experience I had...I've had a few which is why I know I should only stick with one person#Because I trust that masseuse but instead I was like “well let me try the stones they don't offer here” and went elsewhere#ANYWAYS I could see this happening to Eddie and went oh yeah...didn't mean to ramble but here ya go#Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson#Eddie Munson x Steve Harrington#Steddie#Steddie drabble#Jade is Talking
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I know damn well I misunderstood the assignment but we roll, I'll understand it some day
It's killer and dust btw. If you couldn't tell. Which you probably couldn't.. forgor to say but shhh 🤫 Killers having a convo with himself..
..I kinda wanna change my url but idk to what
#I got this compliment once and I was like :3 bc I like compliments. then 4 days later I recognise the name and pfp on#on a tumblr I rlly rlly like bc they're super cool make super cool art and has super cool ideas and I'm just like woah they complement me s#so I search my notifications to find which post they complimented me on and I find out. they're following me. ummm IJWEHFOIWJ#i just can't get over this bc they're literally so cool what#anyways#I got two whole documents of canon dust things and one ao3 of canon things about killer#so I'm learning a way to do justice to the creators image while still putting my own twist on it bc I love fanon and that's how I grew up#I'm literally so passionate about fanon. specifically Gacha fanon bc it's literally so fun and no one else know that#like. literally everyone just like had terrible experience apparently idk how I didn't experience that#am I the only one who knows these characters still had lore Ben though unrelated to anything canon at all#anyways I'm rambling too much whoops#sans au#utmv#undertale au#sanscest#if u want#killer sans#dust sans#kist#if u want...#LOVE affair#teaching myself to use this tag too but eh#did you know Horror is more likely to be a part of the bad Sanses than Dust#Jesus fuck I rambled these tags to hell
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Oh, help me God, this hellboy got me coming back for more
reblogs super appreciated !!! close-ups under the cut !
#south park#south park fanart#stan marsh#shroomer's art !#shroomer's archives: south park#artists on tumblr#my ramblings + thought process starts here (warning. its a lot) vvvvvvvvvvvvvv#"heyyyyy shadowww. its mee. da devil.#the amount of eyestrain i went through while rendering this#gradient maps!!! are so fun!!! (they are not i hate them so much)#lots to improve on still. but that's for next time!#the process of making this was so arduous.... but i learned a lot i feel#(and also if i had spent any more time working on this i would have actually lost it)#BUT YIPPEEEEE HAPPY BIRTHDAY STAN MARSH THE LOSER BOY I CANT BELIEVE I FINISHED THIS ON TIME#2 days in advance too by the time the queue uploads it#anyways.... stupid loser boy stan marsh..... i found out his birthday was coming up soon#and i had this idea sitting in my head for like.... 2 weeks i think#popped up when i was listening to lexie liu's album the happy star and the song diablo came up#and i thought wait.... doesnt stan get possessed by satan at some point#and so here we are!!#I ACTUALLY RECENTLY WATCHED THE EPISODE TOO AND THE THEME OF THE SONG FIT THE THEME OF THE EPISODE CRAZY WELL AS WELL#sometimes my genius is almost frightening#anyways this emotionally sensitive animal lover boy has really grown on me over the course of the series <3#i still havent.... finished cartman's sheet.....#the self designated deadline i gave myself of 2 weeks is coming up soon and erm. guh.#dies#this took so much effort and brainpower that needed to be allocated to my assignments.......#but its ok!!! im gonna sell this as a print!!! so its kind of!! productive!!#guh i hope this one performs well sob theres this nagging feeling i have that its not gonna do well at all#try painting some funky lighting + greyscale painting she said. it'll be fun she said.
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[ID in alt]
hi hey hello. you should go check out @u3pxx 's piece for the mea culpa zine I just made a fun and silly continuation of it because im normal about it <3
more fun and silly shenanigans under the cut
[ID in alt]
#ashenart#aa4 spoilers#apollo justice#trucy wright#phoenix wright#clay terran#apollo justice ace attorney spoilers#weh weh weh 👍proud of myself for getting this done in like. 3 days. sorry to the art asks in my inbox im almost done with yall too#anyways posting this scared style hope everyone likes#<- actually wait no im gonna ramble REALLY FUN TIME WITH THE COLORS ON THIS ONE kinda heart of the cards-ing it#ive been also working on an oc comic for the past couple of months and that + this i think im getting better at servicable backgrounds#I think this is the first big piece ive done w/o lineart and instead just drawing over the sketch i really like how its came out#there was also a scrapped 5th page that was dropped just bc trucy finding the body fitted better for an ending RIP beanix jumping over the#couch you will be missed. by me
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It's mostly the fault of poor editorial practices that B&R is so heavily misaligned continuity-wise w/ the main batman book. But walk with me for a minute:
You are Damian Wayne. You are 14 years old and have had one of the worst years of your life last year. Which is saying a lot.
Your brother, one of the people you were closest to, got shot in the head and forgot who you were. Your best friend went to space for a week and came back 3/4 years older than you, taking away your previously established dynamic and leaving you to have to bond all over again w/ a new one. You may or may not have gone wayyy too far with your new superhero team, who now all hate you, because you fucked up big time*
And worst of all, when you do try to do the right thing, you end up forced to watch Alfred, a father figure to you, the only one at your birthday that year, the person who has been so patient, loving and trusting with you, even when you probably didnt deserve it...die. you watch him die, and feel it's all your fault.
And your dad never corrects you on that last point. So you run away.
First to your mom who can tell something's up with you, she knows you don't give up that easy, you decide not to stay with her because you remembered how actually, neither of your parents are good at communicating with you despite their best efforts, so now you're 14 and flying solo.
And you do fly solo. For a while. Make new friends, new enemies. You think you're better off for it. You've got your best friend and your brother back. They're not around as much. It's fine.
And eventually your dad tells you that it's not your fault that Alfred died. Bit late but it's appreciated. Really. There's a bit of a hiccup where you get possessed by a demon and wage war against your father but after that, all in all, you two are...together again.
You start to think maybe you want to give him another chance, for the two of you to be father and son.
And in a change of pace, it works out! It's going good, mostly. He insists you go to highschool, you resist, feel like he wants you to be something that you're not (wants you to be normal), but eventually you acquiesce for your own reasons. He cheers you on at soccer and nosies around at your fundraising events with the other parents and gives you a stern talking to about your choice of girlfriend. Because he cares.
Except all the while this is going on, your dad is currently having his brain slowly taken over by an evil version of himself that he created and every time you look away he's slowly tearing your family apart (your brothers are just barely keeping it together. The ones who didn't get lobotmized that is Jesus Christ). You keep taking his side in these conflicts, for whatever reason. Maybe because he promised it would be different this time, and it isn't** and you're going to stick with him until he keeps his word for once.
But at the end of the day?
It's like your brother says. You're not the one who saves him. Broadly speaking, you've made things worse and needed others to come save you. And what else is Robin really for? You thought it was about redemption and teamwork but guess you're wrong. It's about saving your self destructive, apparently two-faced and erratic father. And you can't even do that right.
* TT (2016) by Adam Glass is a racist ooc mess, but unfortunately it's still canon so I'm referencing here, though like a lot of works authors clearly wish weren't canon but are, it's been subsequently glossed over. Win? Maybe? Or not?
** again Zdarky's characterization of Damian is so outdated as to be ooc, and considering the way he constantly and explicitly uses it to illustrate Tim's strengths as robin, I'd argue there's. Also implications there. But the batshit insanity of the main batbook compared to B&R rn is crucial for this post, so I'm attempting to justify it. This time..
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#damian wayne#batman and robin#i know i already made an animatic of steph to tears over beers by modern baseball (you know the bit)#but this post has made me think of damian in this context. weeps#idk i read batman 138 for myself and the ways Zdarsky structures it to portray damian as inferior is just. AUGHH IT MAKES ME SICK#LEAVE MY BOY ALONE#the fact that josh williamson (not a perfect writer but i generally enjoy his stuff) had to single handedly save damian-#-after didio left the company and make him robin/a hero again#ONLY FOR THIS STILL TO BE HAPPENING THE MOMENT DAMIAN IS IN A NON JOSH WILLIAMSON BOOK#SICKENING#anyways. imagine if these titles connected and created a greater narrative besides building to event books. would be crazy huh?#that's not fair B&R is enjoyable in its own right and I'd rather have the main batman book touching less things to be frank#but still#if they ever do the theoretical tim/damian robins miniseries that lives in my brain maybe this could be discussed in some way#anyway <3
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The ''Are you trying to romance me?'' meme but with Barnaby and Howdy
i belted this out in like a half hour flat <3 bc Yes
#AH FUCK I FORGOT TO PUT SOMETHING ON HOWDY'S TAG#listen listen this was done in a bit of a rush!!! i wasnt paying much attention!!!#i was thinking about what to have for lunch which is always a Very distracting topic#anyway thank you for introducing me to this meme it fits them So Well i think#like in my mind barnaby could do literally anything and howdy is off to the side all 'god... hes so attractive.... i need him'#scribble salad#rambles from the bog#laughingstock#barnaby x howdy#howdy x barnaby#thinking about them alwayyyyssssss#theyre so damn GOOD together what the Fuck is it about them!!!#i know i say this every time but agh! AGH!!#wait... no wait yeah i Do know what it is about them. ive Realized.#AGH THEYRE SO GOOOOODDDDDDDD#the boyfriends the husbands the Fluffy Fruity Pals <3#alright time for lunch and then its back to packing & the five hour shrek video essay#unless im consumed by the laughingstock thoughts that are fighting to take over my mind again#i need to draw wormie
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pysch is a cool show with comedy and mystery and whatnot but the real mystery/plot/point of interest is the pineapples. I’m just here for the pineapples really.
(Respectfully) move over Burton Guster with your lunatic sidekick Spencer Shawn or something I just wanna see the pineapples
#Pyschos don’t come for me this is one of my favorite shows so far#I’m a little over halfway through season 3 and I love it so much#they’re all so silly and goofy#I also love while Gus is the levelheaded reasonable don’t just always jump into danger guy he doesn’t completely fall into that stereotype#he gets to be fleshed out and also gets to be goofy sometimes and I love him#oh yeah Shawn’s there too#love how he’s universally accepted as bi#Juliet O’Hara the woman you are#I was skeptical about lassie at first but he’s grown on me#anyways#psych#shawn spencer#burton guster#burton gus guster#psych tv#psych show#psych 2006#juliet o'hara#carlton lassiter#just because I did ramble about those two in the tags
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oh hama bead sg-1 we're really in it now
#i made these like. 3 weeks ago but i was hoping to get a better photo to post#unfortunately im riddled with adhd and keep forgetting to do that so this is the best it's gonna get#they're so widdle because i had about six colours total to work with lmao but they're actually so relaxing to make so who knows#maybe at some point i'll be picking it up as a full hobby#that's also the reason daniel doesn't have glasses btw i just haven't found a decent way of doing them#also long hair bc if i ever get around to doing jonas vala and cameron we would have some serious twinning going on#anyway tag ramble over i gotta go to therapy now#stargate#stargate sg1#hama beads#perler art
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the thing i'm learning about being a sports fan is just.... you really have no control over this thing that you love so much and you've invested so much time/energy/emotion in! and that is so hard to accept! you can do all your little good luck rituals, you can critique the players and the coaching and the scheme to hell and back, you can learn as much as you can about how the game works....but it doesn't change a thing. all you can do is sit there and watch the players do the best they can! (and even then there's only so much each individual player can control!)
you just have to practice radical acceptance i guess! what's gonna happen will happen and you just have to sit back and enjoy as much of it as you can 🫠🫠
#or radical optimism lmao#can't believe we're gonna be the first 0-3 team ever to win a super bowl! how exciting for us :) :)#anyway people have definitely articulated this much better before and several times over#but just something i've been thinking about and working on this week#because it's been a hard season and it's only going to get harder#and if i stress myself out too much about it then that's not good!#control what you can control and accept the rest and all that#just a quick little ramble before bed here!
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So basically ATLA brain rot has hit me like a truck
#atla#avatar the last airbender#zuko#toph beifong#what happened was I was forced to watch the live action#which is actually pretty good if you get past the first few episodes#and if you don’t have someone in your ear telling you it’s awful the whole time#first episode is definitely the weakest and that’s 50% gran gran’s fault#aang and katara are also pretty flat but whatever#sokka’s good and zuko’s fantastic actually#they did goof on a few things but overall I think it’s a fun time#just don’t expect it to be as good as the cartoon and you’ll be okay#ANYWAY it got me missing toph#so i rewatched the blind bandit episode#and then wound up watching the entirety of books 2 & 3 in a few days#and now I’m brain rotted#which is especially weird considering when I first watched it I was like#yeah that was good! and then never thought about it again#i dunno what changed but i need help it’s taking over my life#wanted to draw Sokka too but he looks hard to draw#and i had enough trouble with these two#maybe someday#sorry for rambling in the tags goodbye
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Time for a long Aylin ramble, because I haven't indulged in a while.
I'm actually really invested in Aylin being an aasimar! I do not think it is a misnomer or mistake, as I've seen people suggest. She was referred to as a celestial explicitly in some older builds of the game, but this was changed at some point during development. And I noted aasimar enjoyer Oath, quelle surprise prefer it this way for a variety of reasons. Primarily, I think, because it lets her be larger than life, have a touch of that other-worldliness and otherness, while keeping her very much "of this world" still, very (physically and otherwise) present and part of the prime material plane, and ultimately far more human than I believe even she herself would sometimes like to be.
To bring up the most basic and rules/mechanics-bound "creature type" level of categorisation, as an aasimar she is a humanoid, and not a celestial - outsider. Her outsider status is absolutely there and a goldmine of things to explore, but that's a different post sitting in my drafts for far too long that I'll get around to one of these days (but for now you should read this post that I love). Yes, she is in a very real sense above it all, she will outlast everyone around her and whatever she gets involved with. We also get to see her dramatic poetic archaic speech idiosyncrasies (Ho!), her odd sense of the passage of time, and, of course, her oft-discussed and joked about apparent lack of filter or regard for current social graces.
(Endlessly amused at her just going: I'll do it when my mum tells me to.)
All things combined, Aylin feels more like a being of two worlds to me than a guest visiting this one, even as she is called the emissary of a goddess. She embodies a blending and an odd balancing act between the lofty divine and the mundane, duty and preordained purpose and personhood, and touches on the many ways this balance can be tipped. A classic D&D aasimar struggle, really, and a well I am happy to keep returning to.
Balthazar: She was a unique specimen even before I began my work. Aasimar. A god's blood united with mortal flesh.
She honestly isn't even that far from a regular aasimar stat- and ability-wise - Aylin does have several special abilities, but these are flavoured as blessings from her divine mother instead of an inherent property of her as a creature - though, notably, Aylin herself at one point claims she is always reborn because "it is [her] nature".
“Blessed with the favour of a goddess, Nightsong cannot be permanently killed. When unconscious, at the start of her turn she recovers 1 hit point.” “Nightsong will be resurrected by the powers of Selûne whenever she dies.”
Importantly, she does not get to reincarnate, or get a new body, or flit away to her "home plane" or anything like what celestials get to do. She is anchored to this one physical existence (again, very human of her), tied and limited to this one body as it painstakingly repairs itself over and over and over (to a sometimes extreme extent, e.g. the all but outright stated regrowing of amputated body parts in a frankly horrifying context), insistently and indomitably but ultimately imperfectly. And I think that's part of why the kintsugi design drives me utterly wild, why her immortality setup is more interesting to me than, say, a mutant healing factor, or something like the characters in The Old Guard. Her history is pretty literally engraved on her skin, and when she, in the role of a power-granting artefact and the object of a ritual sacrifice, tells you she will feel every wound you inflict upon her, it is so easy to believe her. And I'm not even that invested in physical suffering, just that it means it's all still very palpably there, forever, and she doesn't get to magically restart with a clean slate in this sense, nor does she get to forget past lifetimes as some creatures like devas do. It's just a flavour of immortality I personally find far more engaging than most.
(I mean, yes, I am also a known hurt/comfort sucker and if you're going there in order to set up a scene where she's, I dunno, getting doted on by Isobel who's invented new scar tissue pain relief massage techniques, you know I'm going to be all over that.)
I'm also not sure I'd say she can just pop over to Argentil to hang out with her mum at will. I mean, planeshifting is not that hard to achieve, and also she can just… ask Selûne, ultimately, I guess. But I wouldn't say she has spent much time there, and I think she takes her role as Selûne's champion and representative in the Realms too seriously and too much to heart to be away from them for very long.
Which also calls to mind the issue of the obvious and "simple" answer to Isobel's eventual death - namely that with Isobel picked up as a petitioner soul they'll all just go live out the better part of an eternity in Selûne's realm. Probably in some form they will - it's never guaranteed, but this time, yeah, probably something like that will happen, and there will be, as Melodia says, no loss, only temporary separation. But I'm really not into just handwaving or stripping away most of the mortal/immortal pairing issues inherent in the relationship. If we're going for the "hang out in a different plane of existence forever" option, I think at one point Aylin would have to "complete" her duties and lay down her sword, in a way, and pick between Faerûn and the Gates of the Moon - meaning she herself is effectively moving on to a completely new phase of her existence as well.
And while Selûne carving a lovely marble statue and bringing it to life and similar takes are fun and beautiful and interesting, I'm very invested in an Aylin who was born, raised, and had to actually grow up and learn and be trained. I have a ton of headcanons of Aylin being a weird glowy baby at some point (with all the Disney's Hercules jokes I've seen folks make, of course), being entrusted to a series of Selûnite enclaves and temples and cloisters, hounded by Shar and her agents pretty much all her life.
(Neither here nor there, but Aylin also comes off as a fairly "young" immortal to me - note that I am basing this on absolutely nothing but a general impression and there's no actual hint anywhere about how old she really is. Just vibes.)
To finish up, I'd like to shout out Isobel, and the big humanising factor she is presented as. For instance, a very concrete bit of motivation for Aylin to eventually "humanise" her perception of time, if nothing else.
Aylin without Isobel is horribly depressing to me mostly because she seems to distance herself from her humanity and err on the side of holy duty (see: her epilogue letter, ouch). And Isobel is definitely the person who (invaluably, imo) explicitly and consistently insists on Aylin's humanity and personhood, who cares for her as a woman and not a divine weapon, who actually treats her well-being as a priority, and who understands her so very well and so deeply. Who does acknowledge the gloriously resplendent Dame Aylin, daughter of the Moonmaiden herself in all her awe-inspiring presence and occasionally amusing foibles, but who never fails to look past the titles and fronts even Aylin herself is so keen to put up, and focus on what lies behind it all.
A moment that sticks out to me in particular is her bemoaning Aylin's disregard for her own safety, then actually getting very angry if you suggest Lorroakan can't hurt Aylin:
Isobel: Even after all she's been through, she thinks herself unstoppable - invincible. It all feels like recklessness to me. Player: Lorroakan can't harm her. Have faith. Isobel: He can harm her. Just as Ketheric did. She'll survive it, but she can suffer like any of us - and for longer.
Using Isobel's words verbatim is a good conclusion to my thoughts here, I think: the truth of Aylin being "singular among us all" coexisting with all the ways Aylin is "just like any of us".
And now I'll pay the cute Aylin screenshot tax one last time.
#yes i know i'm sorry i forgot to dump some water over her head before taking these#dame aylin#bg3#baldur's gate 3#aylin x isobel#isobel thorm#meta#headcanon#long post#aasimar#i genuinely cannot find what my meta/rambling tag was#anyway once again for the record i find her endlessly endearing#on top of being an interesting and engaging character
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