#anyway more complaining about bryce coming so sorry for that

[cassianandfenrysaremyboyos]

The way Bryce is so dismissive and rude to Hunt here

[bex-la-get]

I love the new prompt! Can I request 5 and 6 for Ethan and Natalie, thank you!

NONNY! You put together the BEST combo! Yes, I love this, let's go!

Note: This takes place in an AU where Nat and Ethan confessed their love for each other, but Nat decided to leave Edenbrook after her residency.

And fair warning: this is gonna be long.

From this ask list.

5) “...you look like you just saw a ghost.”

6) “I... I can’t believe it’s really you. I thought I’d never see you again.”

Five years. Five long years since Natalie had left Edenbrook.

In those five years, she had thrived. After taking a position in the Internal Medicine Department at LAC + USC Medical Center in Los Angeles, Natalie had revamped the medical industry. From fighting Big Pharma companies-- such as Panacea-- on overcharging for basic life-saving medicines and winning to using her experience of saving Naveen's life to revolutionize patient care and saving countless lives, Natalie had become a household name in the medical community and the world.

Ethan had watched from afar via social media and the occasional television interview she had done. He couldn't be prouder of Nat; she had far surpassed anyone's expectations and was reaching new heights every day. But as proud as he was, he couldn't help but feel a bit sad.

He still loved her. He always would. And while he was thrilled Natalie was succeeding in her career-- and he would never ask her to stop doing what she loved-- he silently hoped one day she would come home. That one day, she would come back to him.

He knew it was unlikely. Still, if there was anything Natalie had taught him, it was to never give up on the person you knew you were meant to be with. And he knew Nat was that person for him. So, until he was proven otherwise, he'd hold out hope for her. Always.

------------------

Ethan was walking the halls of Edenbrook, mentally checking off the to-do list for the Board Meeting he had that afternoon, when he saw a familiar head of bright red hair. He almost brushed it off until he heard that all-to-familiar laugh and his heart nearly stopped.

Natalie.

He turned to find the source and saw Nat talking to Sienna and Jackie, looking every bit the successful doctor she had become. What she was doing here, he didn't know; but he didn't very much care. She was here, she was back. But for how long?

Without realizing it, Ethan's feet carried him towards her. He had to see her in person; had to hear her voice and to see her smile.

As he got closer, Sienna spotted him first and she smiled. "Oh, hi Ethan!"

He smiled at Sienna but was quickly distracted by the blue-green eyes he'd missed so much. The moment Natalie spotted him, she grinned and his heart began to pound in his chest. If it were possible, she was more beautiful now than ever; and yet barely anything had changed. Her hair was longer, her face a little more mature and she held herself with all the confidence in the world. But she was still Natalie. She was still his Rookie.

"Ethan!" Natalie said, making her way towards him.

He outstretched his arms and relished in the hug she gave him, enjoying this brief moment where she was back in his arms. "It's good to see you, Rookie," he said, as she pulled away.

She smiled. "I don't know if I'm much of a rookie anymore."

He returned her smile. "You'll always be Rookie to me." There was such fondness in his words that Nat's eyes shined with admiration for a brief moment. His heart was pounding so hard right now, it was a miracle it hadn't burst out of his chest yet.

"What are you doing here? Just visiting?"

"Actually, I was hoping to meet with you, Chief," she replied. "I'd like to talk to you about something."

He raised his eyebrows, intrigued. "Well, you caught me at a good time. I have some time before my next meeting if right now works for you?"

She nodded and waved goodbye to Sienna and Jackie, promising to meet up with them later, and followed Ethan to his office. He closed the door behind them, ensuring their conversation would be private and turned to face her again, sucking in a breath as he met her eyes.

She raised an eyebrow. "Are you okay? You look like you've seen a ghost."

He chuckled. "Yeah, I-- I just can't believe it's really you. I thought I'd never see you again."

She smiled sheepishly. "I did do a pretty bad job of staying in touch, didn't I?"

He shook his head. "You've been busy saving the world," he said. "You have no reason to be sorry for that. But, if I may, I've been following your career, Nat. And I'm very proud of the work you've accomplished. You've become quite the doctor."

She blushed. "Thank you; you know I couldn't have done it without your guidance. You taught me everything I know."

"Now that certainly can't be true; you know far more now than I could have ever taught you."

She chuckled. "Well, maybe a little."

He smiled and fought every urge he had to take her into his arms and kiss her senseless. Keep it together, Ethan. He shook his head. "I'm sorry, you said you had something you wanted to talk to me about. Please, take a seat." He sat behind his desk as she sat across from him and pulled out a black folder from her bag.

"Yes, well," she began, "I've enjoyed my time in LA and I'm proud of the work I've accomplished. But Boston will always be home to me-- though don't tell my mom that, she's still hoping I'll move back to Philly." Ethan chuckled and nodded as Nat continued. "I-- I miss home. I miss Edenbrook. I miss y-- my friends. And... I may or may not have seen that the DT has an opening for the lead position and I thought I'd throw my name in the ring. For the job."

She placed the folder on his desk. "Everything you need to know about the work I've done over the last five years is in this folder and I have several character references, including one from the Chief at LAC. I've also included my notes that I'll be referencing for my book that will be coming out early next year and--"

"Nat," Ethan cut her off. "There's no need for all this. The job is yours."

She looked at him wide-eyed. "What? Just like that? Don't you want to field questions? Ask me about how I'd handle certain situations?"

"I don't need to; I told you, I've been following your career. I know of the work you've done and I've seen first hand how good of a doctor you are. I don't need to field questions, Nat. If you want the job, it's yours."

She smiled. "Thank you, Ethan. I can't describe how grateful I am. I know the team means a lot to you; I'll do you proud."

"You already do."

She blushed. "So, what's next?"

"I'll get the paperwork filled out and sent to HR. Assuming everything goes smoothly and HR doesn't drag their feet, we can have you start as early as next week," Ethan said. "Unless you need more time to settle in?"

Nat shook her head. "No, I already have a place lined up. I'm just crashing with Sienna and Bryce for a couple nights while the movers bring everything up."

Ethan nodded. "Alright; well, I'll get the paperwork set up shortly." He extended his hand out to her. "Welcome back to Edenbrook, Dr. Cusack."

"It's good to be back," she said, shaking his hand. They smiled at each other for a long moment, neither wanting to let go of each other's hand. Natalie seemed to be searching Ethan's eyes for something before she spoke again. "Ethan-- er, I'm going to Donahue's this evening with everyone to celebrate my return to Boston. You're welcome to join us, if you'd like."

He smiled and nodded. "I might stop by for a bit."

Her face lit up. "Okay; then I'll see you there." She slowly-- almost reluctantly-- slid her hand out of Ethan's and grabbed her bag. "See you later then, boss."

He walked her to the door, smiling. "It's really good to see you, Nat," he said. "I-- I'm glad you're back."

The look she gave him nearly took his breath away. If he were mistaken-- and he rarely ever was-- he'd say she looked at him the same way he looked at her: madly in love. "Me too," she said. They looked at each other for another long moment before she looked down at her shoes and cleared her throat. "I'll see you tonight."

"Yeah, see you tonight," he said. He watched as she left and took a deep breath in an attempt to slow his pounding heart. She was back. She was home. It was as if all his hopes and dreams from the last five years were finally coming true. But there was one big question that still needed answering: Did she still want him the way he wanted her?

Only one way to find out.

---------------------------

Donahue's was packed. Ethan had forgotten it was Wednesday, which meant half-off drinks for all EB employees. It was something Reggie had implemented a few years ago in order to get more weekday business. It had worked a little too well and Reggie had to hire more people to keep up with the demand; but business was booming as a result so it wasn't like anyone could complain.

He'd found Nat and her friends easily; they had commandeered one of the biggest booths in the place and were currently taking tequila shots, courtesy of Jackie.

"Jacks, we're not in our twenties anymore," Natalie reasoned as she pushed a tequila shot away from her. "I can't do several shots in a row and still be a human being the next morning!"

"That's quitters talk!" Jackie argued but relented when Nat gave her the unwanted tequila shot. "More fun for me!"

Natalie laughed and shook her head in disbelief, when she spotted Ethan. Her smile grew and she excused herself from the table, getting up to greet him. He returned her smile and welcomed the hug she gave him, once again relishing in the feeling of having her in his arms. "I was wondering when you were going to show," she said, as she pulled away.

He chuckled. "Sorry; being Chief means I have a lot of extra paperwork that needs to be taken care of."

She shook her head. "You're here now. Come on, we're due for another round, anyway, so you came at a good time."

"Actually," he grabbed her hand, stopping her from walking away. "Could-- could we talk for a moment? Privately?"

She nodded, curiosity evident on her face, and followed him outside to the patio which was, surprisingly, empty. Not that Ethan minded; having the patio to themselves meant less prying eyes and ears. He sat at one of the tables and smiled to himself when Nat sat next to him.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

He nodded. "Yeah; I just... Nat, I realize this might not be very professional of me but I need to know." He turned to face her and took a deep breath. "Before you left, you told me you loved me. Do-- do you still feel that way?"

She rolled her lips together in anticipation to answer and he braced himself for rejection. Instead, she took his hand in hers and said the word he desperately needed to hear. "Yes."

"Really?" He almost couldn't believe what he was hearing.

She nodded. "If I'm being honest, Ethan, part of the reason I moved back to Boston was because I missed you, desperately. I still love you. I always will."

He fought back tears and caressed her cheek with his free hand. "I never stopped loving you, either, Nat. I always hoped you'd come home; come back to me. But I couldn't have asked that of you, especially as your career began to thrive."

She smiled. "I know you wouldn't; it's not in your nature." She scooted closer to him on the bench. "But as happy as I've been in my career, I've always been missing one thing: you." She sighed. "I wouldn't take back the success I've had over the years; I wouldn't give up the career I've built for myself because I'm extremely proud of it. But... I can't help but wonder what could've been if I hadn't left. Where would we be? Maybe running the DT together; maybe we would've gotten married, had a couple kids, maybe got a house in the suburbs. I feel like there's a whole life we could've had if I didn't leave."

"We can't sit here and wonder what could have happened, Nat," he reasoned. "You needed to leave to find your footing, spread your wings, and flourish into the incredible doctor you are today. Don't sell yourself short; the things you've accomplished are nothing to sneeze at." He looked at their joined hands and ran his thumb along her knuckles. "I would never ask you to give up your dreams or put your career on hold for me. It killed me to watch you leave but to see you thrive was more than I could have ever asked for."

"Thank you," she said, quietly. She took a deep breath. "But, since I'm home now, and I plan on staying here... maybe we can pick up where we left off? Try the whole dating thing again? And everyone knows I've made a name for myself on my own so you don't have to worry about anyone saying I slept my way to the DT position."

He chuckled and nodded. "Good point." He squeezed her hand. "I would love to pick up where we left off; if that's what you want?" She nodded and he smiled. "Good; because that's all I want too."

Moving faster than he could process, Natalie cupped his face in her hands and kissed him soundly. He melted into the kiss immediately and kissed her back feverishly, his hands gripping themselves tightly around her hips as he pulled her impossibly closer.

Though it had been years, kissing her was so familiar and natural that it was as if no time had passed between them. Her lips fit perfectly with his, full of unspoken words of love and passion. Five years had passed since he last held her in his arms or kissed her, but in an instant, those five years were gone. The only thing that was left was the two of them, making up for lost time with forever spread out ahead of them.

Tag List below the cut:

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[perriewinklenerdie]

Married (Ethan Ramsey x MC)

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x Claire Herondale

Word count: 2,4 k

Summary: Parts of Ines’s wedding told from Ethan’s perspective feat. E&C dancing, staring at each other during the wedding, basically being a married couple and everyone calling them out for it. OH3 Chapter 11 added content.

Warnings: None, it’s fluff town all the way

A/N: I feel scammed by PB. All the golden opportunities - wasted. So I fixed it.

His shoes sank a bit in the sand as he began walking towards the venue. More and more people were beginning to arrive, sounds of conversation and laughter increasing by the minute. He recognized his coworkers with ease and approached them. The first to notice him is Tobias, his eyebrow arching slightly at the sight of him.

“You came alone? Where’s Herondale?” he asked, looking over Ethan’s shoulder to search for the blonde resident.

“She helped me fix my tie, then kicked me out of our room. And refused to let me see the dress.” He explained, shrugging with a helpless laugh. Harper laughed along with him, clapping her hands gently.

“That’s wife behavior. Are you sure you two aren’t married?”

“Dude, if you two eloped, I’m not going to be working out with you anymore.” Bryce chimed in, acting as though he was offended, a serious look overtaking his face.

“Where would you- why would you- “ Ethan started stumbling over his words, realizing only after a moment that everyone was smirking at him teasingly. He huffed, fighting a blush that creeped onto his cheeks anyway. “I see. You all think you’re funny.”

“You make it too easy, Ethan.” Harper giggled, shaking her head.

“And we know we’re funny, Ethan.” His mentor put his hand on his shoulder sympathetically.

“Hilarious, even.” Baz added.

A small sound of an incoming message caused everyone to stop talking. Sienna unlocked her phone, her eyes scanning the screen.

“Claire just texted me a photo of her in a dress.”

Immediately, everyone jumped to her side, long before Ethan could even move his finger. Once he woke up from the daze, he took a step towards the young doctor that he considered his friend. Zaid stopped him in his tracks with a hand pressed to his shoulder.

“She said to not let you see the photo.”

“Why?”

Her voice rang from behind him. “I wanted to see your reaction myself.”

Ethan turned around and, at once, his breath caught in his throat. His gaze dropped to her shoes and dragged up her body slowly. The gentle flow of her skirt, pink silk that he knew for sure would almost spill through his fingers. The bodice, snug against her chest, accentuating her curves and making his male brain run wild. Careful to not linger on her chest too long – he would not get crap from their friends for this – he finally looked at her face. She was grinning smugly with a bit of a nervous spark.

He stepped up to her, resting his hand on the dip of her waist, tracing the floral patterns under his touch. With his other hand, he grasped hers in a gentle manner, raising it to press a warm kiss to her fingers.

“You’re taking my breath away.” he muttered, staring at her intensely.

“Hypoxia is dangerous, maybe I should go.” Claire teased, leaning away a fraction of an inch. He immediately pushed on her back to stop her, their personal spaces merging.

“Not having you by my side is fatal.” He dropped his voice to a low rumble, her grin melting into the soft smile. Their lips met in a slow kiss, no heat to it, just pure emotions.

They remained like that for a prolonged moment, his hands carefully pressing her to his chest. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, making their bodies move in a swaying motion.

Jackie burst their bubble. “You, lovebirds, the brides are about to arrive, cut it out.”

Ethan pressed his lips to Claire’s one last time, then leaned away. Their noses brushed against one another as their eyes met. He whispered gently. “I’ll come find you after the ceremony.”

She pecked his cheek sweetly. “Can’t wait.”

--

He wasn’t particularly a fan of weddings. He wasn’t invited to a lot of them, either. If combined with his dislike for big social gatherings, one would come to the conclusion that Ethan Ramsey was miserable right in that moment.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

As Ines and Angie exchange vows and talk about their love for each other, his eyes find Claire. Sitting in her chair across the aisle, she’s holding Sienna’s hand and passing her a tissue. She’s all anyone could ever ask for, and the mere sight of her makes him fall down into the void of memories.

How far he’s come as a person. A cynic that dreaded what a new year would bring along with a new batch of interns. A man that had only two people in his life that he could call friends. A man that went to the bar every night to forget the day behind him, only to go back to his empty apartment. All of that was so long ago that he barely recognized that version of himself anymore. He was so different now.

He smiled more. Laughed, even, and found that he didn’t find stupid jokes Lahela made all the time half as annoying as he once did. He didn’t spend every waking moment at work. Instead, he enjoyed his time off. Still at a bar, but not to drink away his worries. Not alone – not anymore.

Now, he had someone to come home to.

Claire shook her head as she laughed at what Zaid said and Ethan’s heartbeat quickened. They grew together as people too, and along with that, their relationship evolved.

From the night they spent together in the NICU, when her head slowly fell onto his shoulder and he couldn’t find a single cell in his body to tell him to lean away. Because he wanted her to be close. It was the first moment in which he thought that maybe this brilliant woman was meant to be more to him than just an intern – and right after that, he squashed the idea back down.

Every hold of her hand, every silent sign of support, he cherished it all. Unknowingly falling deeper for the woman that would become the center of his universe before he realized what was happening.

Their kiss in Miami would be at the forefront of his mind in his every living second until he kissed her again. Growing stronger with each time his resolve broke and their lips met, softly or with wild abandonment.

The first time he could call her his – the first time he had her to himself. He knew in that moment that he was ruined for everyone else. No one would ever make him feel that way, ever again. He knew it damn well – and yet, he still fought against it.

Absence makes heart grow fonder. He now knew it was true. Months he spent away from her, keeping her at arm’s length, taught him as much. How could he deny those words when the moment he pulled her closer to him outside his apartment and their lips touched, he felt his mind go blank and his heart stop. He vowed to never let her leave again. To never lose her.

And then he almost did.

The thought alone made his muscles spasm, and he was a millisecond away from running to her side, just to feel her warmth and hear her heartbeat. Leaving her side now, even if only for a moment, even to do their job, caused a silent voice to go off in his head. A wave of panic usually followed, staying with him until he saw her again.

Thankfully, nowadays, she was within his reach most of the time. She never asked why he sometimes needed to pull her close and just hold onto her – she knew.

He felt the corners of his lips rise on their own accord. She was radiant in every second of every day. In that moment, she was the most beautiful person there. The idea that it was him that she continuously chose to be with, day after day, only made him smile wider.

This was it for him. He found his one and only, as cliché as that sounded – he knew it for sure. Guess weddings really did make people reflect on love after all.

Ethan was very much aware of how lovestruck he must have been looking in that moment. With his eyes on Claire, he was a picture of a man in love – and he was finally ready to admit that he was. He loved her.

Almost as though she could hear his thoughts, she turned around to look at him. Their eyes met and a brilliant smile bloomed on her face. His lips moved as he mouthed the words, her smile becoming gentler.

“I’m yours.”

She mouthed it right back to him.

--

Music wasn’t as obnoxious as he anticipated it to be. That didn’t, of course, mean that he condoned every dance move he saw the guests do. He decided to not complain, though – it was a day to be happy, he wouldn’t bring anyone down with his opinion on their questionable choices of moves.

Currently, he was seated by the table, nursing his whiskey. Mirani twins, Tobias and Naveen sat beside him, all five men watching their colleagues party with wine glasses in their hands.

“How long, do you think, will it take for one of them to break a glass?” Baz asked, leaning out of his seat to see his friends better. Zaid grinned, taking a sip of his drink.

“Any second now. And my bet is on Varma.”

“Why?” Tobias’s face twisted in confusion as he turned towards him, intrigued. Zaid shrugged.

“Because she can.”

Ethan tuned their conversation out, choosing instead to look at his girlfriend. She danced with Sienna, laughing as they sang along to the song. Her dress moved with her, flowing through the air elegantly. He felt the urge to stand up and walk up to her.

“Ramsey, you do know you can just walk up to her instead of sitting here and pining for her, right?” Tobias snickered, punching Ethan’s shoulder playfully. He scoffed, leaning away with a hint of a burn in his cheeks.

“I’m not pining for her.”

“You are.” All four of his companions replied.

He was so distracted by their words that he failed to notice an approaching form. Her hand landed on his shoulder softly, the tips of her nails scratching the back of his neck. Knowing who it was, he leaned into her touch, breathing out deeply.

“Sorry, gentlemen, but I’m stealing him.” she mused happily, dragging her hand down his arm until her fingers tangled with his. Ethan let her pull her up, looping his arm around her waist.

“Stealing is bad, Herondale.” Tobias shot back, moving his eyebrows suggestively at the couple. Claire opened her mouth to speak, but Ethan beat her to the punch.

“She can’t steal something that’s already hers.” He grinned at them, then turned towards her. Claire’s jaw dropped in surprise at his boldness, her posture softening enough for him to pull her away from the table, smirking. Faintly, he heard Tobias’s words.

“Married. For sure.”

Ethan’s arms wrapped around her, fingers hooked onto her hipbones. She threw her arms around his neck, staring up at him with a soft smile. A slow song began playing and one look at where the DJ was situated told them who was behind this change. Ines grinned at them, giving them thumbs up and a cheeky wink.

“Is it just me, or is everyone trying to tell us something?” Claire giggled, nuzzling her nose against his jaw. He kissed her nose gently.

“So, you noticed it too?”

“Kinda hard not to. Girls said we’re acting like a married couple at least twice today.” she traced the lapel of his jacket, laughing quietly at the recognition in his eyes.

“Guys did it too.” Ethan muttered, tightening his hold on her. She laid her head on his shoulder.

“And how does that make you feel?”

He was silent for a long while. They swayed to the song, tuning out everything else. To her surprise, he didn’t tense up – nothing about his posture spelled out the doubts he once told her he had.

“Not as terrified as it did before.”

Claire leaned back to look at him. Their eyes met, tender understanding in them. Ethan leaned down, capturing her lips in a kiss, perfectly soft and not nearly deep enough. She clutched his lapel in her fist, creasing the fabric with how strong her pull was. His fingers dug into her back, skipping past the coarser material of her bodice and gripping the soft silk of her skirt. A voice in the back of his head told him to loosen up the hold or he’ll mark the fabric, but the overwhelming need he felt for her overshadowed everything else and he couldn’t bring himself to let her go.

The song ended and with it, their kiss. Foreheads pressed together, they caught their breath, standing in the middle of the dancefloor. Blissfully unaware of how much attention they gathered with their tender moment.

Ethan opened his eyes and finally allowed his mind to register the music again. Some sort of a fast tune that made people around them go mad. His girlfriend stared at him with an unspoken question, and he got the meaning perfectly well.

With a definite move, he dipped her onto the floor. She giggled, the sound breaking through the loud music to reach his ears. Ethan smirked, throwing her back into his arms. With his lips against her ear, he mused hotly.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve.”

Her leg wrapped around his thigh, pushing their bodies closer. His voice broke off and his breath shuddered at the way their bodies clashed and the suggestive smirk she sent his way. His hand fell to her ass, all inhibitions gone.

“Ethan!” she exclaimed, laughing at the carefree smile he gave her. He moved his hand a bit, albeit begrudgingly.

“Can you blame me? You’re irresistible.” He muttered, kissing the shell of her ear. Claire hummed, then twirled out of his hold and back into it, jumping into his arms with her legs wrapped around his hips. Ethan groaned deeply in his throat, making her smirk.

“I have a few tricks up my sleeve too.”

Notes

This is a part 2 to the Mile High Club fic. As I said, PB could have made the chapter so good with all the wedding themes that I’d lose my wig. Writers apparently don’t know how to do basic research into fiction themes, but that’s okay (kinda). It just means I have more material to work with.

Round two smut is coming soon. 

Thank you for reading! <3

Tagging separately

[13-reasons-ideas]

So I have this idea, You know how people want/like things they can’t have, MontyxOC have always had this friendship that bordered on something more but it never got there. She gets a boyfriend, Monty starts avoiding her majorly & their friendship crumbles until one night he shows up at her door & lays his cards out, they have a heated argument but then it turned into into something else quite heated😘 and as bad as it was that she cheated she doesn’t regret it, he’s all she’s ever wanted anyway

Why Didn’t You Say Anything? 

A/N: contains SMUT. DNI if under 18. 18+ ONLY. Trigger warning: rough CONSENSUAL sex. I hope you like this. I’m sorry it took WAY too long to get around to finishing but I was having a lot of issues finding inspiration for requests. I’ve found it again though so expect more to come. As always, I love feedback and much love. - Em

Montgomery and I had been friends since… well since forever. As long as I could remember anyway. He was a quiet kid. Kept to himself for the most part when we were younger. I wouldn’t come to find out why exactly that was until much later on in our friendship. We bonded over a love of the same candy. It sounds stupid thinking back on it now, but at the time we were just kids. We didn’t really know how to have interests yet.

Eventually, as we got older and we developed our things, we found that even though our interests didn’t really match the way people thought they should-I was a novice musician, he was on his way to being a star athlete- we bonded over our passion and drive for our respective things. He would come over to my house and watch me teach myself to play guitar, play piano, or sing. I would meet him in the park and play catch when he discovered a love of baseball. Or when we started middle school and he would try to teach me how to throw a football. That… never went very well. But he was pretty good at catching it regardless as it turned out, so it worked out in the end.

Our friendship started to change around middle school too. It wasn’t noticeable at first. He started spending more and more time at my place. By then I had learned what his father was like behind closed doors. That had been an interesting phone call to my mom to come get me. Our conversations became even longer and more personal. We talked about our hopes and dreams. Where we wanted to end up when we were finally adults. The running thing was that no matter what we wanted to be when we grew up that week, we were always staples in each other’s futures. I started to seek him out at lunch more. I felt this desire to be near him that I couldn’t explain. Or maybe I could, and I just didn’t want to, for fear of being rejected and losing my best friend.

In high school, when we made different friends and traveled in different circles, we were still best friends. We had always been basically inseparable. Montgomery and Juliette. Julie and Monty. Where you saw one of us, you usually found the other. I waited for him after football and baseball tryouts and my dad made waffles for dinner when he made the team. There was a seat basically reserved for me at games since freshman year. I only missed two games in three and a half years. Once when I had strep throat in sophomore year and once when my uncle died last year. Monty didn’t want to go to that week’s game. I told him if he didn’t, I would never play piano for him again. For his part, Monty sat through countless hours of me learning songs or listening to tons of voice memos while I was writing my own. He was at every one of my gigs, no matter how big or small. It didn’t matter if there was ten people or a hundred people, he was always there, sitting in the first or second row. Even Bryce Walker couldn’t come between us.

I couldn’t help but feel like there was something more than friendship between us. I was still too afraid of rejection to say anything and he never said anything either. Other people had always made comments about our friendship and how close we were. But we both just laughed it off and attributed it to people not understanding that guys and girls could just be friends. When we were in junior year and it became clear to me that the feelings I had ignored and buried for so long, weren’t reciprocated, I decided it was time to move on. There was no point in pining after someone who didn’t want me back. And as luck would have it, the perfect person to get my mind off of my best friend had just moved to town and was assigned as my chemistry lab partner.

Parker Johnston was an average height, thin but lean, young man from Ohio. He had shaggy blond hair and cobalt blue eyes. He came from a stable, well off family, but he wasn’t a show-off about it. His parents were mortgage brokers who wanted to work in, but not live in the city. Essentially, he was everything Montgomery de la Cruz… wasn’t. He did still like sports though. They have that to bond over. I thought after my first conversation with him after chemistry. I invited him to have lunch with us. The guys on the football team liked him. Even Monty was nice to him. Though, at that point, none of us knew what would become of Parker and I hanging out.

**

“I don’t know Monty. We are just going for burgers at Rosie’s. It’s not like I’m going to marry the guy.” I was on the phone with Monty while I got ready for my first date with Parker. We had been hanging out as friends for seven months or so. Over the summer, we had connected more and found we had more than just a mutual dislike of our chemistry teacher in common.

“Well, what do you think will happen?”

“On our date? Or are you asking if I’ve thought far enough ahead to actually consider if we are getting married? Because I haven’t thought further ahead than my math test next Friday.”

“On your date.”

“I think I will have my usual cheeseburger with pink lemonade, and we will talk. Maybe split a milkshake for dessert. Green or grey shirt?”

“Is it the green with polka dots?”

“No, the plain army green one.”

“Grey. The green one gives you too much cleavage. A cheeseburger and lemonade? That’s it?”  

“He’s seen me in the green one before, and no it doesn’t, but whatever. Yes Monty. That’s it. Why do you care so much, anyway?”

“I don’t. Just want to know what you’re planning. Make sure you’re safe.” I rolled my eyes.

“Well, I appreciate your concern.”

“Anytime. Are you coming to the game on Friday? It’s our second home game. First game of October. You know how you love fall games.”

“Of course, I’m coming. It’s not like I have a choice anymore, you guys are stuck with me.” I joked.

“Haha very funny Julie.”

“I try. Hey, listen. I gotta go. Parker will be here soon. I’ll call you when I get home.”

Our first date was going great. We had been to Rosie’s before together, but it was different now that we were on a date. We were there for hours, just sitting and talking to each other. Monty texted me around eight, just to check in. You still out or do I need to call the cops?

I’m still here. All good. He left me on read. I assumed it was because I was still out. “Everything okay?” Parker asked when he got back from the bathroom.

“Oh, yeah. Just Monty checking in.”

“Fair, fair. I guess that’s my cue to take you home for the night?”

“I suppose so.” Even though we had verbalized the need to leave, neither of us moved to leave.

“One more order of fries?”

“Yes.” After our last order, Parker drove me home and I called Monty to spill all the details as I got ready for bed.

The following Friday, Parker and I went to the game together. It was the first time we were going together just the two of us, and not with a group of friends.  As far as high school football games go, this one was pretty standard. We held hands through most of it. Bryce’s parents were out of town again, so he was having a “we lost but I have money so let’s all get wasted” party. “I’ll meet you in the parking lot? Or did you want to just meet at Bryce’s place? I have to go talk to Monty.”

“We can meet at his place if you want.” He looked confused.

“It’s tradition. I always wait for him. I have since freshman year.”

“Oh, okay then. I’ll see you at Bryce’s place Jules.” He kissed me. I smiled into it before pulling away. I watched him turn and walk down the bleacher steps and turn towards the parking lot before running off to find Monty.

I spotted him talking to Luke and Scott. His back was turned to me. They saw me coming but didn’t react. They know me so well now. They know exactly what is coming. I smiled playfully before wrapping my arms around Monty’s waist tightly. He laughed and pried my hands off of him, before turning around and lifting me up in a hug. I didn’t even complain about the sweat. “You know that doesn’t surprise me anymore Julie.”

“I know. But it’s fun.” He was still holding me. “Are you going to like… put me down at some point?”

He turned back around to face Luke and Scott. They were shaking their heads, grinning. “Nah.” He decided.

“Well. I don’t need to see inside the boy’s locker room so you put me down outside.”

“What, you mean you don’t want to see a whole lot of Brycey’s pasty white ass?” Luke teased.

“No. No I do not. Every day I don’t see that is a good day for me. And since you are hell bent on carrying me, can I at least be comfortable? My legs are just dangling here.” Monty stopped walking so I could wrap my legs around his waist like a backwards piggyback ride. His hands went under my thighs to support my weight.

Thankfully, he put me down outside the boy’s locker room. I played around on my phone while I waited for him. “You know, I smell like sweat now.” I said when he came out, freshly showered and changed. He shook his head and smirked.

“I don’t see that as a bad thing.”

“Dude. I smell like your sweat.” He rolled his eyes and stopped to dig around in his bag. He pulled out one of my t-shirts. It was a little wrinkled but still presentable. I took it when he handed it to me. “Thank you. I’ve been looking for this. How long have you had it?”

“A while.” He shrugged. I ran into the girl’s room to change. I handed him my other shirt.

“Since it’s your sweat, you can wash it.”

“You know, you never used to complain about smelling like sweat after a game.”

“Well, I didn’t have a boyfriend who would care then.”

“Juliette, you didn’t have boyfriend period.”

“You say like you’ve had a girlfriend.”

“Oh, shut up.” He pushed me playfully.

“You know. How the hell did we get to our senior year of high school and neither one of us has actually dated anyone? Tyler Down has been on dates.”

“You’ve been on dates before.”

“Yeah. but it was never anything worth getting past the end of date three. And I wouldn’t call what happens in bedrooms or bathrooms at parties, dating. You’ve been on dates too.”

“I mean, sure. But they weren’t serious.” We had made it to the parking lot now. “I’ll see you at Bryce’s?”

“Yeah. I’m meeting Parker there.”

“Awesome.” I hugged him again before sprinting to my car.

The party was in full swing by the time I arrived. I had run to Walplex to grab a bottle of Advil on the way. Monty’s Jeep was parked out front and I spotted Parker’s Ram was parked up the road a little ways. I parked in an open spot and made my way past the people milling in the front. “Julie!” Bryce called, raising his beer in my direction.

“Bryce!”

“Hey Monty, your girl is here.”

“Not my girl Bryce.” Monty laughed as he handed me a drink.

“How many has he had already?” I whispered.

“Two.” I blinked slowly.

“So, is this Bryce in a good mood?”

“Yup.”

“Huh.”

“Hey Jules.” Parker snaked his arms around my waist and kissed my head. “Hey Monty.”

“Hey. Parker.”

“Oh, shit you’re right. She’s his girl now.”

“Fuck off Bryce.” I teased. Monty was looking at Parker and I with his brow furrowed. I mouthed later to him.

The three of us moved through the party easily. Monty and Parker talked about the game. I tuned them out. I was too busy watching them. It was nice to see my boyfriend and my best friend getting along so well. Maybe that was why I never dated much before. I was scared they wouldn’t get along. Soon enough, Scott pulled Parker away to chat. “Go ahead. I’m good here with Monty.”

“You sure?” I nodded, placing my hand on his arm.

“Just don’t steal him for too long Reed.” I kissed him on the cheek. Scott nodded. When they were out of earshot, Monty spoke.

“You didn’t tell him you hate being called Jules?”

“It’s cute when he does it.”

“Julie. I saw your face when he said it. Your eye twitched.”

“Muscle spasm.”

“Mhmm. Sure.” I caught Scott’s eye from across the room. He nodded slightly to me. I took that to mean I should hear what they were talking about.

“Oh, would you look at that. My cup is empty. Time for another drink. Refill?” I took his cup anyway and he followed me into the kitchen.

While I was refilling our cups, Monty’s with beer and mine with a Crown and Sprite, I listened in on their conversation. Monty tried to hide it but I knew he was listening too. We whispered nothings to each other to make it seem like we weren’t eavesdropping. “So what exactly is their relationship then?” Parker asked. He’s asking about me and Monty.

“They’ve been best friends for as long as anyone can remember. There isn’t anything more to it.”

“They seem to spend a lot of time together.”

“Like I said, they’re best friends. And I don’t think I’m the person you need to be having this discussion with.”

“You know them best. Do I need to be concerned?”

“What? No, of course not. Look. She’s never really dated anyone before. It’s always just been the two of them. You have been seeing Julie for a week officially. It’s going to take some time for that relationship to change. Just leave it alone for now. And Monty is a good guy. He’s an asshole. But he’s a good guy. If he wanted to make a move, he wouldn’t do it now. Not knowing that she is in a relationship. You really should talk to Julie about this though.”

“I will. I just wanted to get a little bit of insight from someone else first. Thanks man.”

“No problem.”

Parker did that guy handshake thing with Scott and started walking in our direction. My eyes widened. Monty just smirked and mouthed math test to me.

“Anyway, yeah. That math test was totally brutal.”

“I’m sure you did great.”

“I’m literally eighty percent sure I failed. Mind you, so is everyone else.”

“I have it on Monday so thanks for the heads up. Oh, hey Parker.”

“Hey guys. What’s on Monday?”

“Math test that ruined my entire class.”

“Damn.” I put my arm around Parker’s waist and leaned into him.

Monty was scanning the room. To Parker, he was just looking at the crowd. But I was familiar with that look. He was on the hunt. I pulled Parker away discreetly so we could be alone and he could seem available. Monty nodded and smirked at us. Fuck off you little shit. I stuck my tongue out at him and Parker rolled his eyes. We managed to find a quiet corner that was unoccupied. “So, your drink is Crown and Sprite. You hate math. You don’t like chemistry. You like extra lettuce on your cheeseburger. We’ve been friends for months and I never really noticed any of that.”

“You like vodka in your iced tea. But your drink is whisky and Coke. You hate history. You also don’t like chemistry. You get tomatoes on the side of your burgers. I think you knew all of that about me. It just didn’t matter before.”

“That makes sense.” I laid my head on his shoulder and we sat together like that for a while. We were still getting used to the change in our relationship.

I looked up from my lap and caught Monty’s eye across the room. He had a girl in his sights. I nodded to him. He smiled, thinking no one else would see. The smile he reserved for me. Before he went to talk to whatever girl he would have under his spell and realistically, him in less than twenty minutes, he came over to us. “I’m probably going to be busy for the rest of the night, so will you make sure she gets home okay?”

“Yeah. No problem.” Monty turned to me and gave me a pleading look.

“Dude. Again? Seriously?”

“I didn’t have time to stop on the way over.” He shrugged, acting innocent.

“One of these days I won’t be here. Or I’ll leave my wallet at home. Or I won’t be carrying. What are you going to do then?”

“That isn’t a right now problem. Now do you, or don’t you?”

“I do. Calm down.” I reached into my pocket and pulled out my wallet. Parker was watching our interaction with a puzzled look on his face. I pulled out the square silver packet and handed it to him. Monty accepted it gratefully.

“Thank you. You are a life saver.”

“Don’t do anything you’ll regret in the morning, Montgomery.”

“Never do, Juliette.”

“And don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

“I make no promises.” I sighed deeply. Of course, you don’t. Monty waved at us again and ran off to go make a move on whatever girl it was this time.

I looked at Parker and he was staring at me with wide eyes. “What?”

“You carry condoms around for him?”

“No. I carry them around for me. And if he needs one, then I give it to him.”

“But why?”

“I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but he’s kind of a whore. He is my best friend, but the man is a whore. I’d rather give him a condom than take him to get tested or become a cool aunt. I’m too young for that.”

“What if you needed it?”

“Will I need it? Because I wasn’t exactly planning on needing it.”

“I don’t know. You never know.”

“Well, if that’s the case, I have a whole box at home anyway. I don’t plan on using any tonight though.”

“I wasn’t either.”

“If it makes you feel better, I can start carrying two. Also, I put a fresh one in my wallet every morning so it’s not like they’re sitting.” He only nodded in understanding. Monty was right. I didn’t see him for the rest of the night. He texted me later that he was crashing at Bryce’s.

A few weeks after that party, things with Monty and I were the same as they always were. Parker never brought up his conversation with Scott. I attributed it to seeing us around each other and Parker being comfortable with the status of our relationship. We were getting home from a coffee date. “My parents are working late if you want to come inside. My mom has a double at the hospital.”

“Sure.” He slipped his hand in my back pocket when I was unlocking the door. I blushed. Inside, I dropped my purse on the kitchen counter. He draped his coat over a chair and sat down. I was digging through the cabinets for a snack when he surprised me with a question.

“What’s going on with you and Monty?”

“Uh.” I paused because he caught me off guard. “What do you mean?”

“It’s just how you guys act with each other. I never noticed it before. Or I did and thought it would stop after we got together.”

“I don’t understand the question?”

“Do I need to be concerned about your relationship with him, Juliette?”

“No. Not at all. Monty is the last person you need to concern yourself with. It’s never been like that with us.”

“So, you just flirt with each other and finish each other’s sentences for no reason?”

“Okay, first of all, we do not flirt with each other. Second of all, we have been best friends since we were in elementary. Which means we know things about each other.” I was walking back to the table with a bowl of M&Ms. Placing it on the table, I sat in his lap gently. He wrapped his arms around me.

“You carry condoms around in your wallet and give him one whenever he wants.”

“I already told you why I carry them Parker.” I rested my head on his shoulder.

“You’re sure there’s never been anything between you guys?” Nothing reciprocated.

“I promise there has never anything between us. He really isn’t a concern that way Parker.” I kissed his neck softly. It was barely a brush of my lips against his skin.

“Do you still have that box?”

“Mhmmm.” He stood me up and grasped my hand.

“Lead the way Jules.”

The next day, I woke up alone. Parker had snuck out after a little bit of cuddling, so my parents didn’t find him here. I stared up at my ceiling for a few minutes. It was different with him. It means something. Maybe that’s what I needed to get Monty out of my system. Maybe it had to mean something. I groaned when my alarm went off again. Reluctantly, I got up and got ready to go to school. My dad had already left for work again. I texted Parker and Monty before I left. Stopping for coffee if you want anything.

Parker answered first. I’m good, thanks though babe.

Monty answered a few minutes later. Since you offered, my usual?

Gotcha. See you at school.

Coffees in hand, I pulled up to school. Parker was waiting for me just outside the parking lot. “Hey you.” He kissed me. We were walking to my locker when he saw the second coffee, he continued, “I said I didn’t want anything.”

“Oh. This isn’t for you. It’s for Monty.”

“Ah, yes.”

“We talked about this last night Park.”

“I know. That’s not all we did last night.” He muttered, leaning in to kiss my neck.

“Yeah. Last night was pretty great.” I smiled.

“What about last night?” Monty asked, scaring me a little.

“Jesus Monty. I need to buy you a bell or something. Why do you have to be the only guy at this school whose shoes don’t squeak?” I turned and stuck out his coffee.

“Parker’s don’t squeak.” I rolled my eyes. As though he could snese that I wanted to talk to Monty alone, he made a quick exit.

“I’ll catch you at lunch Jules.”

“Okay. Save some cheese for me.” Parker kissed me before walking away.

“So, what about last night?” Monty asked again after Parker left. I was quiet and blushed deeply. “Julie, what happened?”

“Homerun.”

“Shit. Seriously?”

“Yeah. It was good. Nice.”

“That… that’s great.” I didn’t notice the way his smile didn’t reach his eyes or that he stammered.

“I’ll see you at lunch?”

“Uh, yeah. I have a couple of things to do for Coach, but I should be able to make at least a little bit of lunch.”

“Okay.”

I fully expected my relationship with Parker to change after that night. But I never expected that night would cause my relationship with Montgomery change too. It seemed like the closer I got to Parker the more distant Monty became. At first, it was little things. He had stuff to do with the guys or for sports stuff at lunches. Or he had things to do after practice. He wouldn’t stop to talk as long in the halls with me. If his dad was on another tear, I would find out about it the next day at school instead of that night. He brushed it off when I asked him about it. “I don’t want to seem like more of a burden. I have other places I can crash too,” he had said. For some reason, I believed him. I didn’t think anything of it. It wasn’t the first time he had taken a break from always coming to my place. I didn’t think it would be the last time.

But then, as the days and weeks passed, our relationship became even more strained. He had stopped waiting for me after games. He had all but stopped talking to me at school. My texts were left on read for hours, whereas before, he would answer me within minutes. What had initially been dubbed a ‘break’ from seeking refuge at my house, had become a full out ending. One Monday, when I got to school his cheek was stitched closed. I stopped dead in my tracks and covered my mouth in shock. Upon closer inspection when I passed, it looked like it was stitched with sewing thread. Why didn’t he come to me? He knows my mom keeps a suture kit in the first aid kit. He all but looked through me when he caught me looking. If he saw me coming now, he walked in the other direction. For the first time, my best friend was literally all out ignoring me. I didn’t know what to do. So, I tried to do the same. If he wants to ignore me, then two can play at that game. We pretended the other person didn’t exist.

“Hey, are you okay?” Parker asked me when we were sitting on the couch watching tv.

“Yeah.” I was scrolling through my phone.

“You haven’t looked up from your phone for an entire episode.”

“Huh? Has it been that long?”

“Yes. What are you looking at?” I was scrolling through my texts with Montgomery. The last time we had texted each other was three weeks ago. Before then, the last time we went longer than two days not texting each other was when I was at summer camp and we weren’t allowed to have our phones for a week. I couldn’t figure out what I had done wrong or what made our relationship change. Parker took my phone from me and closed out of messages when he saw what I was looking at. “If he doesn’t want to talk to you because you have a boyfriend, that’s his problem.”

“That’s not why Parker.”

“How do you know?”

“He wouldn’t do that.” Would he?

“How do you know he wouldn’t, Jules?”

“We promised each other a long time ago that we wouldn’t be those people.”

“Those people?”

“The people who stopped talking when one of us got into a relationship. We promised.”

“Okay, well if you promised then I’m probably wrong.” He sounded skeptical.

“We promised.” I muttered. Parker pulled me closer and held me while I tried to focus on our show.

**

I was sitting cross legged on the couch playing I Almost Do on my guitar while I listened to the rain hitting the roof. The old Disney World sweatshirt I was wearing helped me to stay warm, even though the heat was on. As I finished the bridge, there was a knock at the door. I’m not expecting anyone. Maybe its Parker swinging by to keep me company. I set my guitar down on the coffee table and went to answer the door when there was another, more impatient knock. “I’m coming, keep your pants on.” I muttered under my breath. Yanking open the door I felt my jaw hit the floor. “Monty.” I breathed. He was soaked. His hair fell on his forehead and I could tell the flannel he wore was soaked through.

“Hey.” Was all he said. I blinked at him slowly. “Can I come in?”

“Uh, yeah. Yeah come in.” I said, moving out of the way while I tried to figure out what he was doing here. “Did you like… walk here or something?”

“Would you believe me if I said no?”

“No. Trust you not to wear a jacket in the pouring rain though.” He didn’t respond. He just looked around the living room. Okay. This isn’t weird and awkward at all. “What are you doing here Montgomery?”

“I thought about what I wanted to say to you the whole way here. And now that I’m here….”

“What are you talking about?”

“I have some stuff I need to say to you Julie.”

“Oh okay. Now you want to talk to me. Right.” I crossed my arms.

“Can you just let me say what I need to say?”

“Why? I mean, you’ve been avoiding me like the fucking plague for weeks Montgomery. Why should I listen to what you have to say?”

“Because it’s important Juliette.”

“Fine. Speak.” This better be good.

“I don’t know how to say this. I literally had this all planned out in my head on the way here.” He began. I remained silent. “I get that you’re mad at me for avoiding you, but I have reasons for it. And I need you to understand that it hasn’t been easy for me. You’re one of my closest friends.” I let out a dry, unamused laugh. Sure. You just avoid all of your friends. Totally normal behaviour for you. Monty sighed before continuing, “I couldn’t sit around and watch you with Parker. I tried. Believe me. I fucking tried. I tried being happy for you and I tried being friends with him. I tried to ignore everything in me that was screaming to just walk away. But I couldn’t do it anymore. I needed to walk away for both of our sakes. It wasn’t fair to you for me to be half out of our friendship and it wasn’t fair to me to have to keep everything in. It wasn’t healthy.”

“So, you couldn’t be friends with me, or say anything about why you were suddenly shutting me out, because I have a boyfriend? That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard you say. And we promised we wouldn’t be those people.”

“Oh, for fucks-. No Juliette. I couldn’t be friends with you because I’ve been in love with you for four years.”

My eyes widened at his revelation and I felt the colour drain from my face. What? I couldn’t think of anything else to do except laugh. “Yeah, sure you are Monty. That’s rich.”

“You think I would joke about that? You know me Julie.”

“No. I think if you did love me, you would have had the balls to fucking say something about it before I got into a relationship. Or at the very least, to not act like a fuckin’ child when I did get into a relationship.”

“When exactly would I have told you? Somewhere between when you were worrying about your friends and when you were pining after Parker?”

“Yes. Parker and I were friends with each other for months before we started dating. At any of those times, you could have put on your big boy pants and fucking said something about how you felt.”

“That’s nice that you think that. Do you think I would walk halfway across town in the pouring rain for someone I wasn’t in love with? Seriously Juliette?”

“Maybe.” I replied. I was still angry with him, but he did have a point. “It doesn’t matter. You waited too long. I’m with Parker now.” He scoffed. I hadn’t realized how close he had gotten to me until now.

“Doesn’t matter? Look me in the eye and tell me you don’t feel it. Tell me you don’t feel the fluttering or the warmth when we are together. And then tell me that what you feel with Parker is anything close to that.”

“I-I-I….” I started, trying to meet his hardened gaze.

“You can’t can you?” My silence spoke volumes. “Tell me you don’t want this.” He whispered, as he caressed my cheek. I couldn’t tell him that. And I couldn’t pull away. I couldn’t do anything to stop him. For the first time, I had allowed myself to consider the feelings I had buried down deep for so long. I opened the box in my heart labeled danger, and damn it felt good. I reached up and tapped his arm quickly, twice. Our silent ‘okay’ signal when we couldn’t speak. He immediately kissed me hungrily and backed me against the nearest wall. My hands immediately went to his belt and began to tug at it, in a heated attempt to undo it. He nipped at my lip sharply and I growled lowly from the back of my throat. Giving up on the fickle strip of leather, I began to fight with his still wet shirt. The flannel stuck to the cotton of his t-shirt more and more with every tug. Abandoning the idea of removing them separately, I grabbed the bottom of his shirts together and pulled up harshly. All the while, his lips never left mine. The only time they did was to give me the space to pull off his tops. His eyes had darkened at least two shades as he stood in front of me. I felt my pupils dilate again as I reached out for him. He was on me in seconds. The feeling of him tugging at my sweater, now sightly damp from his clothes, as though I was a prize he couldn’t wait to tear into, stirred something inside of me. The primal aggressiveness and the slow burning, ever present tension of the situation making any consequences of our actions, seem totally irrelevant. He managed to remove my shirt with far fewer struggles than I did and began attacking my neck, leaving wet kisses and stinging nips down one side and then the other. Once again, I tried my hand at undoing his belt again. This time, I was able to. Quickly undoing it, I pulled it through the loops of his dark jeans and went for the button. He placed his hand on mine to stop me. I looked at him questioningly.

“What?” I asked, breathlessly.

“Maybe we shouldn’t do this in your living room.” He said, panting. I nodded in agreement and suddenly, he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder.

“Monty!” I exclaimed, taken by surprise. He merely tightened his grip on my waist as he walked through the house to my room in the basement.

In my dark room, only illuminated by the dim pink-red glow of the salt lamp on my nightstand, he strode towards my bed and dropped me on my back. I reached out to him as he took a step back from the bed. “Get back here.” I demanded. He chuckled and shook his head.

“No. Nuh uh. I’ve waited far too long for this moment.” He smirked, devilishly. I groaned in displeasure at him. His smirk widened.

Deciding it was time to take matters into my own hands again, I sat up and slid off my bed. Taking my place on my knees in front of him, I reached up and undid the button and zipper on his jeans. He made no move to stop me as I dropped to my knees and pulled the denim harshly. They fell in a pool at his feet and I sat back on my heels as I stared at the bulge in his boxers. I growled lowly in the back of my throat and reached for the waistband of his boxers. Pulling them down, I watched his cock spring free and whined unconsciously. My movements were suddenly timid as I reached for it. It wasn’t my first time by any means. But it felt different this time. This time it was with Monty. And you have a boyfriend who isn’t Monty. Oh, shut up and let me enjoy this. I’ll deal with the consequences later. Grasping his thick, heavy cock in my hand, I stroked it softly. This was so wrong, yet it felt so wonderfully right.

My strokes changed as I gained more confidence and was able to push away any intrusive thoughts about Parker. They were faster and I tightened my grip slightly. Montgomery let out a sharp breath when my ring fingernail caught a bit of skin. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay, you’re excited. Just remember we have all night Julie.”

“I know.” His hips started to buck a little bit and my mouth began to water.

“We have plenty of time for that later.” I groaned a little. “Look at me.” I looked up at him through my lashes. “I promise you can after I fuck you into your mattress.” My eyes widened as big as saucers. We went from five to a hundred real quick. Fucking hot though.

Monty took my bicep in his hand to pull me up before pushing me back down on the bed roughly. I gasped in shock. I sat up on my elbows and watched him unbutton and rip open the zipper on my jeans. He pulled them down with a little help from me. He took a very brief second to admire my mint underwear before pulling them off and chucking them across my room. I sat up to undo and remove my pink bralette. A low growl came from deep in his chest when my breasts were out in the open and I was naked. His eyes scanned my body hungrily. My own dark eyes admired his naked body. I grabbed his arm to pull him down towards me.

“There is so much I want to do to you, but it will have to wait until later.” He whispered in my ear, biting at my earlobe. He bit and sucked his way down my neck, easily pulling loud moans out of me. There were sure to be marks all over my neck in the morning. Consequences be damned.

“Later, yes.” I panted. I could feel his hard length against my thigh. I rutted my hips against his. He kissed me passionately. When his hand trailed down my body, I knew his intentions. “No time. Just do it. Need it.” He stilled. The passion and tension were still in the air but there was a slight shift.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Yes. Just be quick about it and it’ll be fine.” I stuck out my pinky. He linked his with mine.

“If you need me to stop and adjust, just say so.”

“I will.” I nodded, trying to edge him along. Just hurry the hell up and do it.

Monty straightened up and pulled my hips closer to the edge of the bed. I shut my eyes as he lined his cock up with my entrance. No matter how ready I was and how much I wanted it, it was still a reflex. I barely felt the tip, but I knew more was coming. He held my hands in his, interlocking our fingers as he pushed further. The stretch stung a little. He was bigger than Parker and without taking the time to prepare me, it burned slightly. I whimpered softly and he stilled immediately. Only about half was inside of me. “No, no keep going. Please.” I begged.

“I don’t want to hurt you Juliette.”

“Montgomery. I need you to do it. It hurts more if you stop. Please just do it. You can give me time to adjust after.” I told him seriously, staring into his eyes.

“Okay. Deep breath.” I sucked in a big breath and let it out as he quickly thrust the rest of his cock into me. I yelped sharply and he stilled again. I felt him go to pull out and growled harshly at him.

“Don’t you dare. Just give me a second.” He nodded and stayed still, allowing me time to adjust to his size.

After a minute or so, I was ready. The pain had dissipated for the most part. I felt like we could keep going. “Okay.” I nodded. His thrusts were slow and shallow at first. The more he did it, the more comfortable it became. When my moans grew louder, his thrusting became faster. He was fucking me hard and fast. Quite literally fucking me into the mattress. I tried to match him thrust for thrust. It was sloppy at first, but soon enough, we had a good rhythm going. He leaned down more, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. His cock was buried deeper in me and I screamed. He was moaning and grunting softly in my ear. I let go of his hands and wrapped my arms around his back. Dragging my nails down, I scratched him from his shoulder blades all the way down to his mid to low back.

“Jesus Christ.” He spat out. I smirked and dug my nails into his back. He nipped my collar bone. I was panting and I could feel my core tightening. “Fuck. You are so fucking tight.” Monty stood straight again and hooked one of my legs over his shoulder. The changed angle felt like magic. My moans had become whimpers again. I bit my bottom lip to keep from screaming once again. He used his right hand to rub my clit harshly while his left steadied the leg on his shoulder. I couldn’t hold a scream in after that. His thrusts were starting to get sloppy just as I had begun to fall over the edge. My orgasm hit me like a freight train. My entire body shook. I groaned when I felt his own orgasm hit. The feeling of his cock pulsing inside of me was exquisite. Thank God for birth control and regular testing. Monty pulled out of me gently and half fell, half laid down onto my bed beside me. He was panting harshly. So was I.

“Fuck me.” I muttered.

“I just did.” He panted. I groaned, unable to find the energy to flip him off or move or make an actual noise in response. After a couple of minutes, he stood and put his boxers back on. I hadn’t moved. He walked to the bathroom across the hall, and I heard the water running. Back in my room, he gently wiped me clean with a warm washcloth. It felt very nice on my sensitive folds. I groaned again. Once I was wiped clean, he climbed on the bed again and pulled me close. I snuggled against his chest.

I woke up in Montgomery’s strong arms the next morning. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I groaned softly. Monty stirred behind me. I leaned into him. He sighed. “Half of me thought last night was a really hot dream.” He mumbled sleepily.

“It wasn’t.” I yawned. We rolled onto our backs and I stared at the ceiling. We were quiet for a time. I was processing what happened last night. I cheated on Parker. With the one person…. The one person what? I told him not to worry about? I mean, yeah. But if that was the reason, I would have regretted it as soon as we were done. Oh shit. What does this mean for our friendship?

“Do you regret it?” I paused before answering. I knew the answer already but what would it say about me if I answered him immediately?

“No. Do you?”

“Not a bit.”

“What does this mean? What are we supposed to do now?”

“I don’t know. I can’t tell you what to do. But if I were you, I would break up with Parker.”

“That would be the kind thing to do.”

“Yes.”

“Did… did you mean what you said last night?”

“About you?”

“Yeah.”

“Isn’t it kind of obvious?” He motioned between the two of us. I laughed.

“I just wanted to confirm.” Monty chuckled and turned to kiss my temple.

“Does this mean,” I paused again, “was this just to get it out of our systems? Or do you want more?”

“I want more if you want more. I’d also be down for another round.” I sat up a little and pulled the sheet around my chest to look at him. He was smirking wider than I had seen him smirk in a long time.

“I think I would like more. And as for another round, I think I need to talk to Parker first before this goes any further.” He considered that for a moment.

“That’s fair. I can respect that.” We were quiet again. He’s all you’ve ever really wanted anyway.

[danijimenezv]

Coercion

Prompt/Summary: Based on the lovely Christmas moodboard that @jamespotterthefirst​ made ❤

Pairings: Ethan Ramsey x MC (Jillian Valentine), and a little bit of Bryce Lahela x Ivy Valentine (MC’s younger sister)

Warnings: nothing, mostly fluff. Maybe a swear word here and there, but nothing serious.

Word Count: 1722 words

A/N: I’ve never written anything for this fandom, so I’m tagging a few people that I’ve seen around the main tags. If you don’t want to be tagged if I miraculously write anything else, let me know, no hard feelings at all! As always, feedback would be very much appreciated!

“Absolutely not.”

Ethan stared horrified at the velvety monstrosity the younger Valentine was presenting him, while Lahela and Mirani stared expectantly at him. He shook his head vehemently one more time, in case his previous statement hadn’t been clear enough.

“Come on, Ethan.” Baz clasped a hand over his shoulder, “It’s not that bad.”

“Uh, it’s not bad at all!” Ivy Valentine exclaimed, fully offended.

“Yeah, how come he gets a normal sweater but I get an ugly Christmas sweater?” Bryce complained.

“Because you look good in anything.” Ivy fluttered her eyelashes at her boyfriend.

“Smooth, Valentine.” Bryce hooked an arm around her waist and pulled her to him, immediately crashing his lips against hers.

Ethan rolled his eyes at their very public display of affection, and turned back to the papers scattered all over his desk, taking advantage of the fact that they were no longer focused on bothering him.

“Doctor Mirani, was there anything you wanted to discuss about the case?” he redirected the subject of conversation.

“Not about the case.” he grinned unapologetically when Ethan narrowed his blue eyes at him, “The day is almost over anyway, there’s nothing else to discuss about it today, and you should be trying to make yourself presentable.”

“I am presentable. And I’m sure there are things still left to do here, so you should focus on that.”

“Come on, Ethan, this is huge. It’s all everyone has been talking about.”

“What?”

“Yeah, everyone knows tonight is the night.” Baz wiggled his eyebrows, “You’re having Christmas dinner with the Valentine’s, aren’t you? That’s a big step for you and Jill.”

Ethan pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation, hating, now more than ever, how the hospital gossip traveled around. He never cared much for it as long as everyone did their jobs, never paid much attention to it, but now it involved him, his girlfriend and her family, and that was what made it all the more annoying.

Girlfriend. The word popped up in his mind in a fraction of second, and although it still felt sort of weird, it wasn’t unwelcomed. It had taken them quite a lot to get to exactly that point, namely most of it was his fault, but to be able to call Jillian Valentine his was something he was incredibly grateful for. The second-year resident and junior fellow of the diagnostics team had practically weaseled her way into his life, and she had made such an impact, with her coquettish charm and quick wit, that he could no longer imagine his life without her.

“Ramsey, please.” Ivy returned her attention to him, “You’re a grumpy old man, aren’t you supposed to like this kind of sweaters?”

“I’m not a grumpy old man.” he barely looked up from the paper he was reading, “And I’m still not wearing that thing.”

“I even got you a different shade of green to match your eyes better. More blueish, instead of the plain green.”

“Much appreciated.” he let out sarcastically.

“Bryce.” Ivy whined softly, asking her boyfriend for help.

“Ramsey, my man.” Bryce grinned widely, knowing exactly how to approach it, “I have it on good authority that Jillian would love it if you wear this sweater tonight.”

That made him falter. No amount of begging from the youngest Valentine would make a difference for him. Jillian, on the other hand, was another story entirely; at this point, he was sure there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her.

“Super true.” Ivy caught on quickly, “She has a similar one, and she’s probably going to wear it tonight.”

“It’s less than half an hour for dinner, don’t you two have to go get ready?” Ethan tried one last time to get rid of them.

“I don’t have anywhere to be right now.” Baz pointed out, causing the older doctor’s glare to direct at him.

“Not you, them.”

“We are ready.” Bryce winked confidently, gesturing to his and Ivy’s matching red ugly Christmas sweaters.

“Jesus Christ, you two are nauseating.”

“As are you and my sister.” Ivy rolled her eyes, “But you said it yourself, it’s less than half an hour for dinner, what the hell are you waiting for?”

“I’m simply waiting for Jillian, who, unlike the three of you, is still working.”

“Or she’s changing in the locker rooms.” Bryce offered, “Ivy and I finished our surgeries a while ago. Just admit it, doc; we, surgeons, are just way better than you, medical guys.”

Ethan simply scoffed, but before he could retort back, Baz spoke up, “Wrong, but that’s a debate for another day. I should go find Zaid, and you need to get going to that dinner. You can’t be late, Ethan.”

With a wide smile on his face and a last wave, Baz exited the office, humming a catchy Christmas song softly.

“Okay, enough of this, I’m done.” Ivy marched towards him and shoved the sweater in his face aggressively, “I’m Jill’s sister, and as her boyfriend you need to keep me happy, right? So wear this tonight.”

Ivy spun around on her heels and strut right out of there without a look back. Bryce shrugged, not being able to come up with an explanation for his girlfriend’s loss of patience, and quickly followed after her, leaving the diagnostician finally alone. He inspected the item of clothing closely one last time, before cursing the youngest Valentine. Time seemed to stretch as he continued to stare at the sweater, almost with offense, before he sighed in defeat and pulled it over his clothes. He was in the middle of grumbling under his breath about the damn piece of clothing he felt forced to wear, when his favorite voice resonated from the doorway.

“Hey, I’m sorry for the delay, but I’m ready now.”

He looked up in time to see Jillian halt completely and inspect him from head to toe, but before he could offer some kind of explanation, a breath-taking smile overtook her delicate features as she spotted the sweater. And just like that, all the insults and complaints that had been swirling in his head since Ivy showed it to him disappeared, because even if he wasn’t a huge fan of it, wearing that damn sweater made it all worth it if it got his Jill to smile like that.

“You got a Christmas sweater?” she asked breathily, still staring in wide-eyed wonder at him.

“No, not those awful sweatshirts your sister and her boyfriend are sporting around proudly. This barely counts as a Christmas sweater, and it’s as far as I’ll go for the holidays.”

“Good enough for me. It’s the sentiment that counts.”

Jillian walked decisively to him and threw her arms around his shoulders, standing on her tiptoes to reach better, while Ethan slouched slightly and wrapped his own arms around her waist. She giggled softly as Ethan ran his nose against hers, their foreheads pressed together and blue eyes boring into honey-colored ones.

“Did you wear it for me?”

“Most things I do are for you, Doctor Valentine.” he smiled softly at the adoring glint that sparked in her eyes, “But I was also coerced to wear it by your incredibly annoying younger sister.”

“Aren’t you glad you didn’t have to deal with Ivy as an intern, then?”

“Of course I am. She’s Harper’s problem, I already have my hands full with one Valentine on the medical team.”

“And you wouldn’t have it any other way.” Jill grinned, “Right?”

“No, I wouldn’t.” he leaned in and kissed her, though the moment was too short-lived for Jillian’s liking, because she whined softly when he pulled away, “Now, I believe we are expected to attend Christmas dinner with your family, so we should get going. I don’t want to be late.”

“What if we just… skipped it?” one of her hands wandered slowly down the expanse of his chest, gripping the sweater and releasing it multiple times.

“Jillian Valentine, is there a reason you don’t want me to have dinner with your family?” his voice was teasing, light-hearted, but the question had a twinge of worry underneath.

“It’s not like that.” Jillian spotted his doubt immediately, with that uncanny and unexplainable ability to pick on his thoughts as if reading his mind, “It’s just… as loving as they all are, my family is a bit complicated. My siblings are a nightmare, you would know because you’ve already met Ivy. And my parents are… intense. You’re too important for me, I don’t want them to scare you away.”

“That’s what you’ve been worrying about the whole day?” Ethan asked, placing his hands firmly on her hips and looking down at her with a stern expression on his face, “Jill, there’s nothing that could take me away from you. I thought you already knew that.”

“I know, I know, but I’ve just been overthinking about it.”

“Well, I promise you, there’s nothing in the world that can change the way I feel about you.”

“Okay.” she whispered, completely dazzled by the intensity of his words.

“Was that all?” he wanted to make sure.

“Yes, I promise. Nothing else. Definitely not any doubts about you or our relationship. I’m in for the long haul.”

“Good, because so am I.”

Jillian caressed his cheekbone delicately, “Don’t ever doubt my feelings for you, Ethan. After all, I was the one who fought for us, remember?”

“That you were.” he agreed, sighing in relief, “And I’m so very glad you did.”

“Me too.”

This time, when he kissed her, he made sure not to rush the moment. As soon as his lips came in contact with hers, they kissed passionately and urgently, like they couldn’t get enough of each other. Ethan deepened the kiss and pulled her as close as he physically could, his hands exploring the soft skin and subtle curves he already had memorized by heart. Finally, Jillian pulled apart from him, softly nibbling his lower lip before letting it go.

“Now, let’s get moving, Doctor Valentine.”

“Yes, boss.” she answered back mockingly, biting her lip to stifle her giggles.

“Jillian.” Ethan warned her.

With a heartfelt laugh, Jillian pulled away from his embrace, but entwined her fingers with his, and finally, they made their way out of the office together, ready to meet the Valentine’s for Christmas dinner.

*******************************************************************************************

Tags: @jamespotterthefirst​, @missflashgeek​, @parkerattano​, @openheart12​, @starrystarrytrouble​, @takeharryandgo​, @aestheticartsx​, @choicesfanaf​, @caseyvalentineramsey​, @utterlyinevitable​, @aworldoffandoms​, @the-pale-goddess​, @dr-ramseys-rookie​, @drariellevalentine​, @tsrookie​, @perriewinklenerdie​, @genevievemd​, @drethanramslay​, @openheartthot​, @mvalentine​, @justanotherrookie​, @lucy-268​, @paulfwesley​, @writinghereandthere​, @rookie-ramsey​, @missmiimiie​, @openheartfanfics​, @ramseyandrys​, @ruinedbypixels​

[zigtheeortega]

if we meet again

[part one of the again series]

pairing | bryce x mc

word count | 10k

warnings | mentions of sex, innuendos, drinking.

tags | @raleighcarrera, @pixeljazzy, @dakotawinchester, @writinghereandthere, @pixelsandkink, @masquerade-reimagined, @choicesarehard, @nerdferatum, @bobbymckenzie, @agentdumortain, @bryceslahela, @lahellacute, @violinet, @zigsnose, @adamdusmortain, @drsobemoji, @choeries, @houserosario, @plasticdodecagon, @noimarocketman (tagged sideblogs instead of main blogs!)

author’s note | so i recently finished the before trilogy of films, and i really wanted to write something based off of it but in a way that would better encapsulate bryce and my mc spencer! part one consists of years 1 - 4, taking place through their undergrad years at university. this is gonna be a bit of a journey so buckle up! 

read on ao3! [disclaimer: ao3 version has smut included, not separate.]

•─────────────────•

year one

The ride from the airport to her parents’ home was long and grueling, the slushy ice pelting the windshield barely passing for snow.

It was practically sub-zero outside, a stark difference between the mid seventies weather she’d just left.

Boarding a plane wearing a tank top and layering as she stepped off was a weird experience to say the least. It was like stepping into another world.

The cookie cutter suburbs were nauseatingly bland. Was this really what her parents wanted?

Sure, they were the typical awestruck immigrant family who were obsessed with the American experience, but to be wholly consumed by it? God she never wanted a roundtrip date to come so fast in her life.

They’d closed on the house faster than she could complain about it, but she couldn’t have done much anyways. They’d packed the house up right before she left for her freshman year of college, so the decision didn’t affect her too much.

The slush came down harder, sounding nearly like hail on the roof of her taxi.

She glanced down at her dirty tennis shoes and grimaced – she dreaded having to lug her suitcase from the taxi to her front door.

When it screeched to a stop, she handed the driver a couple bills (leaving a hefty tip, because hey, it was the holidays) and retrieved her things from the trunk.

Backpack slung over one shoulder, suitcase gripped in her right hand, she braced the freezing wet rain.

The walk from the mailbox to the front door was way longer than she remembered. About halfway up the short stairs, she made a crucial mistake. The ball of her foot caught a patch of ice and she tumbled to the ground.

“Ah, fuck,” she grumbled, twisting her body so she was sitting on the stairs. The rain seeped through her jeans, freezing her ass and thighs.

“Hey, miss, you okay?” A voice called from across the lawn.

Her loose hoodie obstructed her vision, so she couldn’t see the man, but she heard his shoes squelch across the grass as he jogged towards her.

“Here, lemme take that,” he said, grabbing her backpack and suitcase before helping her up with his free hand.

She tossed her hood back to catch a glimpse of the kind stranger, and her breath hitched in her throat at the sight of the handsome boy in front of her.

A single dimple appeared on one of his flushed cheeks as he flashed a grin at her, his hair damp from the falling rain. “You good?” He asked again, brown eyes searching hers.

“Uh, yeah, I’m alright. Thanks for coming to help me up,” she said, a smile tugging at her lips.

“I’ll help you to the front door. This is your house, right? I’m not aiding and abetting a burglar?” He teased, turning to walk towards her door.

“No, no. My parents live here,” she said, pointing at the house.

“And you don’t?”

“Technically yeah, in between semesters,” she said, shrugging. “Just took my last final this morning.”

“Oh, cool, me too. I made it in a couple hours ago,” he said, gesturing to the house to the left of theirs.

“So, our parents are neighbors?”

He grinned. “You sound disappointed.”

She shook her head, shoving her hands in her pockets. “No, it’s nice to know someone my age around here. They moved into this house right as I was moving into my dorm, so I didn’t get a chance to get to know anyone.”

“I guarantee my parents were the one to sell you this house,” he said, handing her the backpack and rolling her the suitcase.

“Your parents are realtors? That’s cool,” she said, nodding. “They must be great at their jobs if they convinced them to buy the house so fast.”

He laughed, eyes crinkling at the edges, his irresistible dimple popping up again. “I don’t know shit about the housing market, stranger.”

She couldn’t hold her giggle back. His laugh was infectious. “I’m the stranger? You ran up to me first.”

“Yeah, but I landed first, so I deem you the stranger,” he said, gently poking her arm. “So, stranger, do you have a name?”

“Spencer Matsuzaki,” she said, holding a hand out, half of her palm covered with the damp wrist of her hoodie.

“Bryce Lahela. Nice to meet you, stranger.”

––––

The first night home wasn’t terrible. She was practically interrogated, though.

She zoned out, slipping into the same routine she always did when she was bombarded with questions about school.

She had to stay neutral and cordial while explaining aspects of her life in grave detail on top of leaving out tons of information for her parents' health. Her parents would go into cardiac arrest if they knew how much she’d drank that semester.

After dinner, she retreated into her room for the night, grimacing at the catalogue-esque decor. Her parents really leaned into the middle class american aesthetic, and she wasn’t fond of it.

She missed living in the city. Their apartment overlooked her favorite movie theater, favorite coffee shop, and the playground of her old elementary school a couple streets over.

She missed being within walking distance of places that harbored her favorite memories. And from her new window, her view was nothing more than the house across the street and a few scattered bare trees.

The only thing she enjoyed about her new house was the balcony in front of her window, just large enough for her to sit comfortably with another person. Not like that was happening anytime soon, though.

She tugged the blanket around her shoulders, trying to fight off the biting cold. She tightened the drawstrings of her hoodie, shielding her headphones from the wind so she could hear her music clearly.

Her thoughts wandered to the boy next door.

Bryce Lahela. Beautiful face, beautiful name.

She couldn’t really put a finger on it, but something about him was so familiar. Like she’d known him for lifetimes already.

God, she admired people with that quality – being able to make someone so comfortable the minute you meet them that they just slip into whatever void you’d needed filling.

Potentially a dangerous quality, but Spencer didn’t let herself think about that possibility.

The snow had let up, the freezing temperature preserving what’d already fallen. She allowed herself a glance over at the Lahela residence, half hoping she’d find him outside.

Thankfully enough, he was exiting the front door with a wide shovel in hand, bundled up properly, unlike when they’d met a couple hours before.

She watched him as he easily shoveled the muddy sludge off of the walkways. It was just quiet enough that she could hear his soft grunts with effort at the initial plunge of the shovel into the snow.

She didn’t mean to stare. But what else was there to watch? The road was quiet, bare, like a car passing by too loudly would break the suburbian immersion.

After he’d shoveled the first pathway leading up to the house, he moved to the driveway – not before he ripped the beanie off of his head, shaking out his golden strands.

She watched unabashedly, trying to figure out how the hell a gorgeous surfer bro straight out of a Hollister ad was living next door.

He squinted in her general direction, throwing up a gloved hand to cover his eyes. A grin spread quickly, and he tossed the shovel to the ground with the other hand, using it to wave.

“Hey, stranger!” He called.

She ducked down, trying to hide her blushing cheeks as his laugh rang out, disrupting the silence.

–––

Ten pages from the end of her crime novel, right before they revealed the killer, a heavy handed knock caused Spencer to jolt nearly a foot into the air from her sitting position on the couch.

She picked up the book that morning, trying to do something productive that’d double as an excuse to get out of conversing with her parents. Eight hours later, give or take, and they’d barely bugged her for meals, let alone awkward small talk.

Shuffling to the door in her pajama pants, she yawned as she yanked the door open, expecting to see a mailman or something of that nature.

Bryce stood there instead, flirty smile and all, dimple pronounced like the cherry on top of his overwhelming attractiveness.

“Am I boring you already? Sheesh,” he teased, shoving his hands in his pockets.

She cut her yawn off, squeezing her eyes shut. “Sorry, I –” She cut herself off with yet another yawn, shaking her head. “Uh, sorry. I know that was probably super ugly.”

He shrugged. “I thought it was cute.”

She tugged her arms around herself, the tank top doing virtually nothing to shield her from the cold. “So… What’s up?”

He grinned, digging in his pocket. “I’m glad you asked.”

He whipped out two tickets, handing them to her. “Light show. You and me. Now.”

“Now?” She asked, eyebrows shooting up to her hairline.

“Yeah, now. What about it?”

She gestured to her outfit. “I’m not dressed.”

“So? Get dressed,” he shrugged again.

She rolled her eyes. “You really think my parents will let me out this late? I came back to a curfew, you know.”

“Oh. We can work around that.”

“How?” She was genuinely baffled by this guy’s confidence.

“Sneak out.”

“Did you… Did you just skip over the part where I hinted at how strict my parents are?”

He shrugged, again. “Worst case scenario, they ground you for the rest of the break. Then you go back to college in a couple weeks, and they can’t boss you around there, so what are you really risking?”

She chewed her lip, contemplating. “I mean, I can’t argue with you on that one.”

“So you’ll come?”

“Yeah. You’re lucky my parents aren’t home right now,” she said, jabbing an accusatory finger at him.

“Like they could resist this face.”

––––

Downtown – or what she presumed was downtown – was overtaken by lights, the edges of the area blocked off, vendors lined up in parking spaces, nets of overhead lights illuminating the huge displays below.

They’d been walking in silence for a while, just soaking it in and basking in the holiday spirit.

Despite her disdain for the town, Spencer loved the way they celebrated the holidays.

“Hey, I’ll be right back,” Bryce said a bit suddenly, running off before she had a chance to respond.

“Oh… kay,” Spencer murmured, watching him disappear into the crowd. She tugged at her beanie, raking shaky fingers through her hair.

Bryce was… unwavering. He had such a strong personality and a knack for flirting without meaning to.

To put it in its simplest terms, he made her nervous. Really nervous.

It was like the minute he left her immersion was broken and she realized just how hot he was and that she should be nervous.

Her eyes wandered, trying to alleviate some of her apprehension. She hadn’t been to a community-unifying event like that one before, so watching the families and children prance through the snow was enough to fulfill the soft spot in her heart only classic Christmas movies could fill.

“Here,” Bryce huffed from behind her, breaking her concentration.

She turned at the sound of his voice, flinching when she realized how close he was to her, disposable coffee cup in hand, steam slithering out of the small hole in the lid.

“What’s that?”

“Hot chocolate. I figured you’d want something to warm you up,” he smiled, lifting one shoulder in a lazy shrug.

“Oh, this is perfect,” she said graciously, taking the cup from his hands, warming both by the way their fingers brushed each others’ and the heat from the drink. “Thank you.”

“Ah, no need to thank me. It’s the least I could do after dragging you out here,” he said a bit sheepishly, kicking the toe of his boot into the snow.

“You didn’t drag me out anywhere. You were convincing,” she laughed, taking a small sip of the hot chocolate, revelling in the way it warmed her from the inside out. “Maybe a bit too convincing.”

“I don’t need to know how powerful I am or I’ll let it go to my head,” he winked. “How is it?”

“Delicious.”

He nodded. “Perfect.”

She sipped on her drink in silence for a while, racking her brain to come up with conversation topics.

They’d really only spoken in passing, so what the fuck were they supposed to talk about?

“So… you want to ride the train?” He asked, pointing at the train riding through the town square.

Within minutes they were seated on the train in the caboose – the very last seat. Families were spread out through the first couple cars, then onto couples.

They probably didn’t want toddlers watching high school aged kids swapping spit, so they sent them to the back.

That notion made Spencer nervous. Was she on a date? He hadn’t really specified – hell, he was barely giving her details about where they were going before dragging her out of her house.

The train began to move, slowly riding through the square, the families in the front chatting and the children giggling and waving at the passing patrons.

She chatted with Bryce about nothing in particular, just kind of getting to know each other. She found out he loved baseball, hated night classes, and was a huge fan of pineapple – he could smell it in her shampoo.

She’d just begun to relax before noticing the young couple in front of her lean in for a kiss that turned a bit heated. Her hands were clasped in her lap to keep them from trembling, her breath just as shaky.

A warm arm grazed her shoulders, his arm resting on the top of the seat. There wasn’t any pressure for her to do anything with him. But she kind of wanted to.

She mustered up the courage to flick her gaze in his direction, settling on his soft, pleasant smile, seemingly permanent on Bryce’s features.

“Is this a date?” She blurted, cursing herself immediately.

He didn’t seem phased.

“If you want it to be.”

She definitely did.

––––

The walk to her front door was long, even longer than when she was on her own lugging her belongings through the icy slush.

“I had a really nice time, Bryce,” she said, ambling up the last couple steps.

“Me, too. I’m glad I bought an extra ticket yesterday,” he grinned.

She raised a brow at him, prompting him to continue.

“After I helped you inside I immediately left to go get tickets,” he said bashfully. His cheeks were flushed – from the cold or the admission, she had no idea.

“So you’d had this date planned for a whole day?” She asked, a bit taken aback. He’d definitely painted it out to be a spur of the moment thing, no premeditation in sight.

“So it was a date,” he teased, dimple even more prominent as he spoke.

She scrunched her lips to the side to hide her own smile. “Yeah, I think it was.”

“Can I kiss you?”

She made the grave mistake of breaking eye contact, her gaze darting from his mouth back to his eyes. He closed the gap between them in one step.

“I can’t kiss you in front of my house. My parents could see,” she whispered as his gloved hand flicked her messy strands away from her cheeks.

“You wanna save this for another time?” Her heart couldn’t help but race at his playful tone.

She nodded.

“How long are you gonna be here for break?” He asked. “I wanna see you again.”

“I’ll be here through the week.”

“Good. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He pulled her into a hug, warm and enveloping despite the cold. “Goodnight, Spencer. Sweet dreams.”

She was so comfortable, so safe in his grip that when she felt him loosen it, she squeezed him tighter without really meaning to.

It was scary how quickly she’d grown attached to a complete stranger.

“‘Night,” she waved, eyes still trained on him as she closed the door.

––––

It took her way too long to fall asleep that night.

His last question and her agreeance to the terms ran through her head on loop.

She was anticipating what he was going to do next. Excited to see how the rest of her break would look like.

After a restless night, she awoke pretty early, lounging around in bed for way too long, aimlessly scrolling through social media.

A day ago, she’d have been jealous of her friends vacationing at the beach, but… she wasn’t as upset at the idea of being home for break.

She stood up, stretching and popping her limbs, grabbing a hoodie from her luggage to throw on.

As she did, something caught her attention, just at the edge of her peripheral – a folded slip of paper in her window sill.

She grabbed it, unravelling the damp paper, trying to decipher the bleeding ink.

“Had to leave earlier than I thought. Sorry. Not sure when I’ll see you again, so here’s my number.”

The paper had been covered in water for a long while, so long that the number at the bottom was smudged, the hardest to read out of the whole message. She could barely make out the area code, let alone the rest of it.

She crumpled it up and threw it in the trash, deciding she could just head over and ask his parents for his number instead if he’d left for school.

After trudging across the lawn through the snow, she noticed something was a bit off, but decided to push the feeling down and ring the doorbell.

She peered through the glass of their front door, realizing that the lights were off, clothes and boxes and bags strewn across the foyer.

No one was home.

––––

year two

The moment the taxi pulled to a stop in front of her house, her eyes searched the front lawn of the house next door.

The familiar sensation of disappointment lingered, despite her constant chastising to not get her hopes up.

She sat on her balcony for a couple hours a day, the space heater on full blast at her feet, trying not to look desperate as her eyes flickered to and from Bryce’s house.

But no one entered or exited the house all break.

––––

year three

He stared down the bottom of the glass, eyes trained on the milky film the eggnog left behind, the spiced rum shots he’d taken warming his limbs.

The trial had been grueling.

No one could’ve prepared him for the way the legal system chewed him up and spat him out each time he entered the courtroom and sat on the opposite side of the room, avoiding his parents’ cold glares.

He shouldn’t have had to testify against them in the first place, but who else were they going to call to the stand? Keiki? She could barely write her own name, let alone understand her rights.

And she shouldn’t have to see her parents – hell, her whole family – being scrutinized and ripped apart, televised for anyone within a thousand mile radius.

He didn’t know that this town was their escape.

If someone would’ve told him two years ago that his first Christmas in college would’ve left him in shambles, his entire world upturned, he wouldn’t have believed them.

Thank god it was one of the only properties they owned that was untouched by their blood money.

Word had spread to his university students, causing him to have to go into hiding. Did all his work from home, got special permission from the chancellor to move his courses online.

He was forced to stay in Hawaii, juggling court and school on top of the press and the general stress of life – he’d been on autopilot since his parents woke him up in the middle of the night to fly back home.

The moment he finished his finals that semester, he boarded the plane without a second thought.

He needed an escape. 

Despite the whirlwind, she was on the back of his mind through it all.

Anytime his life got a little too difficult, his mind roamed to the last time he felt normal – the last 48 hours before everything went to shit.

When he’d touched down he’d entered the empty, dusty house, throwing his things down and trudging next door.

The heavy raps of his knuckles against the wooden door were the only display of confidence he could muster.

Is Spencer here? He asked.

She’s in Europe for break.

Europe.

Of all the places she had to be during the holidays, it had to be across the world.

So he found himself at the bar, a newly 21 year old downing holiday drinks as fast as the bartender could make them.

She’d probably forgotten about him. It’s best he moved on anyways.

––––

year four

Graduation was so close she could taste it.

Yeah, she was drowning in med school applications and coming down from her post MCAT high, but her degree was peeking over the horizon, just within her reach.

She could only afford to visit home for a couple days before she had to roadtrip to a couple med schools to tour and interview.

She’d grown into herself the past three years, gaining confidence she didn’t know she had in her. Countless haircuts, style changes, shifts in interest – anytime she was uncomfortable she reinvented herself. It was freeing as hell.

So… going home was weird. Like she was regressing. She knew she wasn’t, but it didn’t stop the itching feeling that she didn’t belong there.

Her parents convinced her to visit for the holidays since it was her last year before she was truly on her own. The car ride was anxiety inducing – she tried to shove the thoughts to the back of her brain.

It’d been three years. She couldn’t dwell on it anymore. It was just a fun weekend, a spontaneous date, a gorgeous guy. Nothing more than that.

She’d moved on for sure – lots of dates, sloppy bar makeouts, and one night stands – but she couldn’t completely forget about the stranger.

It wasn’t like anything super memorable happened – it was a classic crush because of how confident he was.

Now that she’d started to emulate that same confidence herself, the allure was mostly gone, but she just couldn’t let him go no matter how hard she tried.

This time her eyes flickered to the house next door, gaze lingering a bit longer than she wanted to allow herself to look.

At least on paper she was growing.

–––––

Her first dinner at home was the same as always. She spent most of the time dodging intrusive questions and diplomatically answering as well as she could.

Maybe she should’ve thanked her parents for pressuring her to come home – it was perfect interview preparation and she didn’t have to lift a finger.

Her room was untouched as usual, the decor nauseatingly basic – if she hated it before, she hated it more now.

The suburban life was even farther away from what she’d wanted three years ago. Fast paced city life and a job in a world renowned hospital were her only two goals as far as she was concerned. Anything else could wait.

As she unpacked her toiletries, she found herself glancing at the door to her balcony.

She shook it off, choosing to settle in bed with a warm blanket with her laptop and planner, trying to focus on her diploma application.

––––

She jolted awake, scrubbing the sleeve of her jacket across her cheek, grimacing when she saw streaks of drool on the fabric.

She shuddered a bit, realizing she fell asleep on top of the covers, the room’s temperature absolutely freezing.

The space heater was close by, luckily, so she didn’t have to shuffle far to plug it in, crouching down next to it to rub her hands in front of it.

The window to her balcony was cracked just slightly  – it’d probably blown open bc of the wind or something. She pushed herself to her feet again, closing and locking the door, but not before catching a glimpse of a light. It wasn’t a streetlight. It was a porch light.

She flung the door open and stepped onto the balcony, ignoring the snow seeping through her fuzzy socks, numbing her toes.

Bryce’s lights were on, and fresh tire tracks trailed up the driveway to the garage.

––––

She tossed and turned that night, a little glad that she’d gotten at least some sleep in the form of a nap.

She gave up after a while, brewing coffee and sitting in the kitchen with her laptop for a couple of hours before her parents awoke.

When they finally woke up, she practically jumped at the chance to ask them about him.

“No one’s lived next door for years. Someone comes and checks up on it once or twice a year, but other than that, it’s vacant,” her mother said, elbows deep in a sink full of dirty plates.

She was thankful her mom was preoccupied so she wouldn’t see her deflate.

––––

Spencer allowed herself approximately thirty minutes of sulking before she made a to-do list of everything she needed to get done before noon.

She’d been home for less than a day and she was already itching to get out.

The drive from her parents’ house to the tiny coffee shop was short, the handful of tables inside bare. She guessed it was because most people were at home enjoying spending time with family – she was the odd one out for having her planner and laptop splayed across the table.

She was neck deep in a chem textbook when she saw him.

He was more chiseled. Taller, too.

The beanie was tugged tight around his head, cheeks flushed. The quarter zip up fit him like a glove, hugging every single muscle.

He slipped his gloves off, tucking them into his pocket, squinting – probably trying to decipher the inane pun names for each drink.

“Can I get a, uh, latte with a couple espresso shots?” She heard him ask, peeking over the top of her textbook, trying to get a good look at him.

He chuckled pretty suddenly, pointing at the clear display of pastries. “Add one of those little things onto it.”

“You mean the ‘Rudolph Red Velvet’ cake pop or the ‘Dasher & Dancer Dark Chocolate’, sir?” The teen said.

His grin stretched even wider, hunching over to read the labels. “Can you tell me the rest of the flavors?”

“Well, we’ve got the full setup of reindeers. It gets pretty confusing at times – ’Dasher & Dancer Dark Chocolate’, ‘Prancer & Vixen Vanilla’, ‘Comet & Cupid Cheesecake’, ‘Donner & Blitzen Berry’, and ‘Rudolph Red Velvet’,” the teen listed off, pointing at the nearly identical cake pops.

He laughed, booming throughout the small room, ringing out even over the blenders.

Yeah, that was Bryce. No doubt about it.

“Give me one of each,” he said, handing the teen a couple bills. While they counted the change, Bryce tossed a $20 bill onto the counter. “This is compensation for having to read those god awful names.”

They mirrored his expression, pocketing the bill.

Spencer was nearly frozen with fear – she didn’t think she was going to run into him. She looked frumpy and felt exhausted, and was a little frustrated at how little she understood from the passages she’d tried deciphering.

She stood up, then sat down immediately. She stood up again, conflicted.

But before she could decide what to do, he turned, coffee in hand, bag of cake pops in the other – one cake pop tucked deep into his cheek. 

She saw him.

He saw her.

Time slowed. 

She was grateful that he was the first to move towards her, eyes bright, gaze soft like he’d seen an old friend – God, that reaction alone was enough to make Spencer float above the clouds.

He chewed his cake pop on the way over, setting down his bag and coffee near the edge of the table out of the way of her mess.

“Hey,” he mumbled through a mouthful of food, chewing vigorously.

“Bryce, oh my god, I – I thought I’d never see you again – you just disappeared and –”

He held up a hand, swallowing. “What’d you say?”

“Oh, I said that I thought I’d never see you again –”

“Wait, wait,” he flipped the side of his beanie up, revealing wireless headphones, which he tugged out and immediately pocketed.

Christ. Embarrassing. Her cheeks burned, inwardly cringing. This is going so swimmingly, Spencer.

He shook his head incredulously, mouth moving like he wanted to say something, but no words came.

“I… didn’t think I’d see you again,” he said, eyes slowly raking over her features.

“Oh my god, I didn’t think I’d see you, Bryce,” she said, nervously adjusting her glasses. Good thing he didn’t notice her recycling sentiments.

“So… how have you been?” He smiled, taking a sip of his latte.

He was playing this way cooler than she was. How was he not freaking the fuck out?

“I’ve been good. Uh, good and kinda busy I guess. I’m waiting to hear back from a couple of med schools and I’m graduating this spring, so I’m excited about that,” she said, trying and failing to figure out how to condense three years worth of personal growth into a couple sentences without boring him to tears. “What about you?”

He nodded, tipping back the steaming latte again. “I’ve been pretty good. Got into my dream med school and it’s, like, across the country from where I am now, so that’ll be good for me. Fresh start, you know?”

She gave him a slight smile, closing her textbook and stacking her planner on top of it.

“Oh, I was just picking this stuff up, so I can let you get back to studying,” he said, unsure, jabbing his thumb towards the door.

“No, no, I was closing it so I can give you my full attention,” she explained, shaking her head. “Just getting some random stuff done. I’m fine.”

He relaxed a bit more at that, settling into his seat like he was at home. “So… what are you working on?”

“I’m getting some last stuff done before I leave this weekend. Just some basic housekeeping. Ironing out details, you know,” she nodded, fiddling with the frayed hole on the hem of her hoodie.

He was trying to jump back in like everything was… normal. This wasn’t normal.

“Oh you’re leaving?” He seemed disappointed, a wrinkle forming between his brows where he pushed them together.

“Yeah, I’m using part of my break to fit in some last minute tours and interviews.”

“Oh… Well if you’re leaving soon, do you wanna do dinner at my place tonight?” He asked. “I feel like we’d be more comfortable catching up there.”

A… date? After all these years? And he still knows literally nothing about me?

––––

She chewed her lip, trying to hold back a smile.

His pulse raced, wondering if she’d reject him. He should’ve thought it through before blurting out a question like that. He’d spoken to her for all of five minutes and he was already asking her to go back to his place.

“So… is this a date?”

The mischievous look on her face was contagious – just a hint of flirtatious teasing like the first time they met.

“Yeah, but only if you want it to be,” he answered, tossing the drink back again, the liquid warming his insides (his morning run was long, and the wind was biting).

“And if I don’t?” She adjusted her glasses again, the only sign of tension amidst her otherwise calm demeanor.

And if he hadn’t ran through the memories of that night over and over, fixating on every little detail he managed to retain, he might’ve not caught it.

Her nervousness was a comfort – It meant she still liked him enough to be on edge around him.

“Then we’re just two neighbors catching up while eating food,” he shrugged, popping another cake pop in his mouth.

He held the bag out to her. “Want one?”

She peered over into the bag, lashes gently brushing her under eyes. “Will you get mad if I take Rudolph?”

God, she was so fucking pretty. He couldn’t get over it. All these years and she only managed to get hotter.

“Why would that bother me?” He mumbled through his mouth full of cake.

“He’s supposed to be special, right? I just thought you’d want him,” she said, crossing her arms on the table and leaning in more.

He sat up, leaning an elbow on the table, tipping forward to close the gap between them – he plucked the cake pop from the bag by its stick, waving it in front of her face.

She didn’t retreat. The only reaction was the color rising to her cheeks, a hint of rouge beneath the spatter of light freckles on her face – the ones that no one could see unless they were this close.

“You’re special, too, y’know,” he said, pushing the limits even more, bringing it to her lips. “Take it.”

He was egging her on, testing whatever change she’d clearly been through – underneath the confidence lurked something sultry that he desperately wanted to bring out of her.

She leaned forward and lowered her mouth around the pop, sinking her teeth into the stick, her lips grazing the tips of Bryce’s fingers.

She pulled back, chewing through a smile. “Yum.”

His stomach flipped, but he kept his poker face even.

It was odd, having this girl in front of him that he’d thought about for years when he’d convinced himself it was a fluke or a dream or a little bit of both.

They both chewed in silence, eyes still firmly locked on each other.

There was so much he needed to say but it just wasn’t the right time.

“What time should I come over?” She asked after swallowing.

“When do you usually eat dinner?”

She rolled her eyes at him, still trying to hold back a smile even though she clearly found him mildly entertaining if not infuriating as hell (which was an attitude he thrived off of).

“I don’t care, Spence. Whenever you want.”

––––

Bryce tapped his foot, adjusting the napkins and cutlery for the hundredth time before pacing towards the monitor that showed him the front door’s security cam.

He should not have told her to come over whenever. The delivery guy was stuck in traffic, so his whole plan of pretending like he cooked was thwarted by the icy roads.

He checked the delivery app for the millionth time, the time remaining still stuck on “14 minutes”.

Was a button up with slacks too much for dinner? Christ, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d actually been nervous before a date.

He wasn’t sure if it ever had happened before, because it didn’t happen.

He wasn’t afraid of shooting his shot with anyone. That cute guy at the gym? No hesitation. His bio lab partner sophomore year? Of course. The ex-girlfriend of the one fraternity brother he didn’t like? Yup. That one fraternity brother he really liked? Hell yeah.

There wasn’t a time that he he actually had to try to get someone to like him – his conquests weren’t really conquests. They’d always just kind of… fallen into his lap, for lack of a better phrase.

But he also couldn’t name a single person he’d “pined” for, whatever that meant. Spencer was the first girl that had slipped through his fingers – maybe this date would be closure. If she was down to fuck, maybe they’d get the weird three-year-long outstanding “what if?” question answered.

He filled the bucket with ice, neatly digging the champagne bottle’s base into it, even grabbing a rag to wipe the perspiration off the metal to buy some time.

A few more minutes passed. When he checked the app again, it’d changed to “13 minutes”, and Spencer was walking down his driveway.

Even on the grainy screen he could tell that whatever she had on was gonna drive him wild.

He strode towards the door, flinging it open to greet her.

“Hey, Spencer,” he grinned, opening his arms wide for a hug.

She matched his expression with a sweet smile of her own, slipping into his grip and molding herself against his body like she belonged there.

Fuck, she smelled delicious. Her hair, her lip gloss, her perfume – everything about her was delectable and made holding back all the more harder.

“Hey, Bryce,” she murmured, squeezing him. “It’s cold. Can we move inside?”

“Oh, yeah. Sure. Sorry about that,” he apologized, pulling back but keeping his palm on her lower back, shutting and locking the door behind him.

She walked into the main corridor, just kind of… observing. Taking everything in.

“Huh.”

“What do you mean, ‘huh’?” He asked, glancing down at her discreetly. 

“It’s… nice. I can tell it’s your parents’ house.”

He chuckled, surprised. “Yeah, but what is that supposed to mean?”

“None of your personality is in this house. I figured it’d be brighter. Less marble, too,” she said, gesturing towards the decorations straight from a catalogue sprinkled throughout the house.

He couldn’t help that his parents insisted on flying out their personal interior designer to every house they owned. But it didn’t make it any less cringe worthy.

“No, you’re right,” he nodded, shrugging. “Can’t argue with that.”

He gently steered them towards the kitchen, his eyes flitting towards her as she scanned the house, a pleasant enough look on her face.

“What would you change about this house?” She asked, sliding onto one of the never-been-used barstools.

“Well, for one, I wouldn’t even have it in the first place,” he said, opening the cabinet next to the fridge, retrieving the champagne glasses.

“Really?”

“Really. If I had it my way, we would’ve never left Maui.”

She nodded, teeth sinking into her bottom lip.

Setting the glasses down in front of her, he stood on the other side of the counter, grabbing the bottle by its neck, unravelling the wrapping on the outside. “Hope this is alright. I just picked a bottle that looked expensive.”

“Expensive doesn’t mean better,” she said, eyes trained on the bottle, probably trying to read the label.

“You’re right, again. Two for two,” he joked, sliding the cork from the opening with a loud “pop”, the sound ricocheting off the walls and flooring.

After pouring it, he cocked his head her way, encouraging her to take the first sip.

She tipped the glass back, her nose scrunching after taking a deep swallow. “Mmmm. I would’ve settled for the shitty boxed wine I drank in college over this.”

He took a sip and shook his head, sticking his tongue out with a grimace. “Yeah, this tastes like ass.”

She snorted, covering her mouth as she laughed, making a breathy choking sound that he found oddly endearing.

“To answer your question, I’d probably paint the walls yellow. Hang up my grandpa’s old surfboard my dad passed down to me, if I can even find it. Maybe some movie posters,” he continued, gesturing towards the deadspace on the walls in the kitchen.

“Yeah, that’s kinda what I pictured, too,” she hummed, shivering after downing the rest of the glass.

“You don’t have to drink anymore. We agreed it tastes like shit,” he walked over to the cabinet, browsing the bottles, nearly empty. “I only have… a little bit of tequila and some rum.”

“I’ll take a rum and coke then,” she smiled gratefully, pushing the empty glass to the side.

While making the drinks, he checked his phone, hoping that the driver was close by. No luck – the time hadn’t shifted.

“So… when’s the delivery guy getting here?”

He could sense her behind him. When he turned to offer her a glass, he realized just how close she was.

She accepted the glass, craning her neck around him to look at his phone’s screen. “I knew it.”

“What? What’d you know?” He asked, unable to look anywhere but her plush lips, curved upwards into a grin.

She was life-ruiningly pretty. It was like God himself scanned Bryce’s brain and 3D copied his fantasies into the form of Spencer Matsuzaki, who was quite literally the girl of his dreams.

“I knew you weren’t a cooking type. I figured you were gonna get takeout, and I was right,” she pointed at his screen, the delivery app still open.

“Yeah, I was gonna try to impress you and pretend that I’d cooked everything but clearly that didn’t pan out,” he chuckled, peering down at her.

“That’s the oldest trick in the book, Bryce. I would’ve easily clocked that,” she shook her head, taking a quick sip of her drink, still standing close enough to him that he could feel her breath on him each time she laughed.

Before he dropped everything and propositioned her right there to take it to the living room, she turned on her heel and walked back towards her stool.

They sipped their drinks in silence, an air of awkwardness settling into the atmosphere – for the first time in, well, years they were completely and utterly alone.

She chewed her lip, swiping her thumb across the perspiration on the cup. “So…” 

“So?”

“I feel like we have a lot of ground to cover.”

He nodded. “I guess the question now is ‘where do we start?’”

“We could just ask each other stuff and see how that goes.”

“I’ll go first – are you still single?”

A laugh ripped from her chest, bounding off the walls and floor, filling up the space with sound (one that was quickly becoming his favorite).

“That’s the first thing you ask me? After all these years?” She asked incredulously, shaking her head in awe.

He grinned. “Sounds like you’re avoiding the question.”

“Yes, I am.”

“Avoiding the question? Or you’re single?” He teased.

“I’m not seeing anyone at the moment, no.”

“Oh, at the moment. Seems like I’ve got some competition.”

Laughing, she tipped her head back to take a deep gulp. He watched as she did, a bit envious of the glass wrapped between her fingers and the rim caught between her lips.

She was a bit more timid when she drank the hot chocolate he offered her years before, cupping it with both hands and taking soft sips, smiling shyly, like being offered a drink on a date was something she should be grateful for.

The way she held herself was different. Before, it was like she was apologetic for taking up too much space, but this version of Spencer took the world by storm – like when she walked into the room, she claimed the space as her own before anyone else could tell her differently.

Whatever miniscule reservations he had about sleeping with her were out the window before she set her glass back down.

“I’m assuming you don’t have anyone at home waiting for you if you asked me that first,” she said, bluntly, chewing on a piece of ice.

“What makes you say that?” “Well you’re obviously gauging whether or not you want to fuck me tonight so I might as well be as upfront as you,” she shrugged, a teasing smile tugging at her lips.

“Is that so?” He quirked a brow at her. “Would you count frequent hookups?”

“Nope. I’ve got those, too, but I don’t count ‘em.”

“So you turned out to be pretty wild, huh?”

She laughed. “I hope you realize how weird you sound. I’m not who I was at 18. Shit, and you barely even knew me then!”

He held his hands up in protest. “My bad.”

She tapped her nails on the counter, looking a bit conflicted. “No, it’s okay. Just a bit of a sensitive topic, I guess.”

“Parents, huh?”

“Yep. Don’t quite approve of who I am, even though I’m literally going to be studying to be a doctor,” she rolled her eyes. “I did get pretty wild, though. I mean, I had to get it out of my system before med school, you know?”

He shrugged. “Totally understandable.”

“Speaking of, why aren’t yours here? I figured I was going to accidentally run into them or something,” she mused, crunching on another ice cube.

He tried hiding his reaction, but he couldn’t help the way he tensed up at the mere mention of them. The thought of her bringing them up crossed his mind before, so thankfully he was able to keep it moving.

“Oh, they moved back to Hawaii a while ago. Been waiting to put this house on the market but it just didn’t seem like the right time.”

“So why aren’t you with them for the holidays?”

He stiffened, racking his brain for a believable lie. There was no fucking way he was baring his soul to the girl that just stepped back into his life.

She was the last good memory he had before everything went to shit, so he couldn’t break the illusion. Spencer was too good for this – maybe too good for him.

Court baggage was a heavy load to bear. Criminal baggage was even heavier. Lying to save face was the only way he could protect them both.

“Oh, it was just cheaper for me to stay here than fly back to Hawaii.”

She nodded, seemingly in agreeance, swirling the last bit of ice around her glass before tipping it back again. “S’good you get a little peace and quiet between semesters.”

“You have no idea,” he breathed, practically sighing in relief, thankful the crisis was averted.

“I do have a question, though,” she said, setting the glass down and pushing it away from her. “Why did you leave your number on my window sill?”

He leaned over the counter, bracing his arms against it. “So you did see it.”

“You’re lucky I found it! You could not have chosen a worse place to put it.”

“Well, you used to always walk out on your balcony so I thought it’d be safe.”

She pursed her lips, seemingly holding back a smile. “You remember that?”

“Yeah, of course. Why didn’t you, you know, use the number, though?” He asked, teasing.

Her mouth popped open, looking almost offended by his words. “Oh my god, you think if I had your number we still wouldn’t have talked for three years?”

“When you put it that way, I guess it doesn’t make sense,” he laughed, taking a swig of his drink.

“No, but I can’t get over that – you thought this entire time that I just didn’t try to contact you? Bryce, you offered to kiss me before literally disappearing into the night – you thought I wouldn’t have at least, you know, tried following up on that?” Spencer was giggling in between her words, barely able to get it out of her system.

“Yeah, well, you think I didn’t want to follow up on the kiss either? I’m the one who offered!”

They were cutting up, both leaning over the counter, folded over in laughter. They’d shifted closer as they got more comfortable with each other, their arms nearly grazing each others’ over the cold granite. 

God, she was so beautiful. Everything he felt when he met her three years ago was pretty much amplified. He had it bad for her.

When she noticed how close they were, her eyes flitted to his lips, tongue darting out to wet her own.

“You wanna cash in on that now? I heard that ‘Bryce Lahela Kiss Coupons’ never expire,” he said, voice low, reaching out to swipe the pad of his thumb over her chin.

“Bryce…” she said, closing her eyes, before leaning back to put some distance between them. “We have to lay some ground rules first.”

He sighed, standing up at his full height. “Okay, shoot.”

“I’m not trying to go all analytical on you, but we have to get this out of the way first. Tell me where your top three med schools are.”

A snort escaped him before he could stop himself. “What, do you only fuck guys that go to –”

“– And girls –”

“And girls – that go to John Hopkins?” He asked, teasing. “Me, too, by the way.”

She shook her head, ignoring his joke. “Nope. Just tell me.”

“Well, I’m looking at California, New York, and Chicago. What about you?”

“Ohio, Virginia, and Washington.”

The pieces fell into place for him. “Damn, you were playing chess and I was playing checkers, huh?”

She laughed. “No, no, I was just curious. I didn’t think we’d get as far as relationship talk, but I figured after everything we’d been through, we might as well discuss it, you know?”

“So that means this is a one-and-done type deal.”

“I guess so,” she said, scratching at her neck. “I’ve made out with plenty of people before and forgotten it, so if you want to just see how we feel, I’m down.”

“Oh, I think you’ll remember this for a while,” he said, stretching across the counter to gently cup her face in both hands, pressing a deep kiss to her lips.

Their first kiss was unlike no other. What’d started out as an offhanded joke to relieve three years worth of tension quickly morphed into desperate grabbing of clothes, heavy pants, and even heavier tension crackling like a fire between them.

She fisted his collar, dragging him to her over the counter, kneeling on her bar stool and pushing herself closer and closer to him. 

Bryce had his share of sloppy bar makeouts, passionate kisses amidst sex – even sweet domestic kisses during mundane tasks. But this kiss? Somehow it was a bit of everything rolled into one.

They parted pretty abruptly when he elbowed her empty champagne glass and it clattered against the counter.

“Shit,” he cursed, pulling back just a hair to check the damage.

When he turned back, she was still holding him, staring at him, a look on her face that he hadn’t seen before.

“That was…” her lids fluttered, tongue darting out to lick her lips – like she was savoring his taste.

“Really good.”

She nodded. “Insanely good.”

“So?”

“So what?”

“Is it what you were dreaming of?” He teased, but there was a hint of sincerity to it. 

She nodded again, her grip tightening on his collar. “I’m a little scared at how much I enjoyed it.”

“Scared? Why?” He murmured, stroking his thumb against her cheek in comfort.

“Well… this can’t happen,” she gestured between them.

“It doesn’t have to happen. We can pretend like the kiss never did, just like you said. I don’t mind,” he shrugged.

“But… what if I want it to?”

He couldn’t conceal the smirk tugging at his lips. “You wanna take this upstairs?”

She tried holding back a smile. “Maybe.”

“Well, you can think about it over dinner, whenever that gets here.”

The driver took about twenty minutes, and eating took them twenty more. Small talk was managed, jokes were cracked, but there was an unmistakable feeling in the air that both of them could sense.

Bryce was no stranger to sexual tension. Hell, he thrived on it.

Making a cute girl blush? Exhilarating. Getting a guy at the bar fund his hangover? Incredible. Those few minutes between knowing you’re going to fuck someone and actually fucking them? Couldn’t get enough.

The minute their plates were cleared, she took his hand and led him upstairs, throwing glances back at him like if she let go for a second he’d disappear.

As much as he just wanted to fool around, he couldn’t help but pocket the small details for later, just in case he decided it was alright to get emotionally invested. Despite feeling like he had a hold on the situation, he definitely didn’t.

He was a bit delusional in thinking he wasn’t already falling for her the way she was for him.

––––

[part 1.5 coming soon]

____

They’d been curled up in bed for nearly an hour and a half, just talking, every once in a while pulling the other in for another kiss that led to roaming hands. 

In another life, if they’d both lived in that town and grew up there, there was no doubt they’d be best friends. High school sweethearts, even.

But she knew that whatever daydreams she’d conjured up could never be reality.

This was a one-time thing. They both knew that.

After a lull in conversation she slipped out of bed, gathering her clothes and tossing them onto the bed.

“You leaving?” He asked, sitting up.

“Uh, yeah. I think I need to get going. I’ve still got a curfew,” she shrugged, making a hand motion like she was pulling the trigger.

“Still have one? Damn, that sucks. Am I gonna get to see you tomorrow?” He rubbed the back of his neck.

He remembered her curfew?

She snapped her bra back in place, avoiding his eye as she slid on her straps. “I, um, have to leave.”

“I thought you were staying through the weekend?” He sounded taken aback, like he thought he had more time.

She slipped her underwear and pants on fast. “I have a long drive ahead of me and I kinda wanted a night to breathe before I tour and interview, you know?”

He was silent. She threw her sweater on before daring a glance at him. His eyes were trained on the mattress, refusing to look at her.

“Bryce,” she called, but he shook his head.

She sat on the mattress, tipping his chin up with her finger. “What’s wrong?”

He lifted one shoulder in a shrug, sighing. “It’s stupid.”

“C’mon, it’s not stupid. Tell me.”

“I’m kinda regretting this being a one-time thing.”

She raked his hair back, leaning in to press a kiss to his cheek. “I am, too.”

He met her eyes again, brows furrowed. “You are?”

She nodded. “I like you. A lot.”

“So what’s stopping us? We can make it work if we try –”

She sank her teeth into her bottom lip, looking at the ground. “I don’t know if we can.”

“Why not?”

“The distance, first of all. And we’re going to be in different programs in different states, so there’s no way we can fully commit to school and our future if we’re trying to start a relationship and maintain it –”

“Spencer, you think I’m gonna give up that easily after all this time? I just got you back,” he said, lifting a hand to cup her cheek.

“This isn’t giving up, Bryce… this is… practical. Rational,” she added, leaning into his touch. “The right thing to do.”

“It doesn’t feel right.”

“I know, but… I think it’s easier to move on now rather than later when we’re in too deep,” she gulped, trying to soothe the lump forming in her throat.

She knew this wasn’t gonna be easy, but she figured it’d be easier than falling for him over phone calls and video chats and sweet good morning texts and the inevitable breakup that came after.

“You sure we’re not already in it?” He asked, underneath his breath, gaze flitting to her lips.

She rolled her lips, shaking her head, trying to mask her wobbling chin.

“If you don’t want to get hurt, I get it, but I need you to know that I haven’t stopped thinking about you since I met you,” he said, cupping her cheeks with both hands. “And – and I never thought I’d see you again, so I don’t want to let you go without at least, you know, trying to fight for you.”

He brought her in for a deep kiss, seemingly trying to plead his case with his touch.

“Maybe we should just go our separate ways and pretend tonight didn’t happen. It might be less difficult,” she murmured after he pulled away.

“None of this will be easy for us, Spence,” he pressed their foreheads together, both of them closing their eyes.

“Honestly, I want nothing more than to be with you. I want you so badly, but I’ve got so many commitments and my career and I can’t just throw my responsibilities out the window, because I know I would – that’s what scares me,” she whispered, voice cracking.

“You’re right. I hate that you’re right.”

––––

When she slipped back into her room after saying a quick goodnight to her parents, she curled up in her bed and cried.

She didn’t want to cry – it was like her body wouldn’t let her hold it in any longer. The sobs wracked her body as if personified guilt had grabbed her by the shoulders, dug its fingers into her skin, and shook her the tears from her.

Hours later, she woke up in the middle of the night, face still puffy and irritated. As she stood up to go throw cool water on her face, she noticed something taped to her window.

His number and socials were listed in a neat bulleted list, and below it, he’d scrawled a simple note:

“If we meet again.”

––––

[atruththatyoudeny]

Monthly Reads | December 2020

I haven’t had much time to read much this month but I really enjoyed all these fics. As always, all the love for all the authors. Thank you for making this time brighter ♥

❅ Like a Picture Print by Currier & Ives | armadillosunset | Christmas - fluff - humor - established relationship - 10k “What thrift store clearance bin did you pull that atrocity out of?” Niall wheezes, doubling over from laughing so hard. They all stand there, holding their collective breaths in that moment. Everyone except Niall, whose laughter is the only sound in the entire flat — the entire building, the entire universe at this moment. “Didn’t know we were doing an ugly sweater party this year! Why didn’t anyone tell me?” — Every year, for as long as they’ve been dating, Harry knits his boyfriend, Louis, a sweater. And every year, Harry hopes for a ring on his finger in return. Maybe this is the year Harry finally gets what he wants.

❅ Baby, You're On My List | lovelarry10 | Christmas - fluff - meet cute - pining - kid fic - 17k Harry takes his niece to see Father Christmas, but he doesn't count on meeting the cutest Christmas elf. Taken by the handsome stranger, Harry decides to recruit as many children as he can so he can see him again, and again, and again...

❅ The Ideal Flatmate | Larry_you_know | Christmas - roommates - hate to love - musunderstandings - no smut - 12k Louis shares his flat with the ideal flatmate (or I-F as he often nicknames him). Harry is a bit younger and a bit taller than him. He’s polite and there is nothing to complain about. Harry rarely brings someone over, he isn’t loud, he eats at the table and when he uses the shared area for his crafting projects he always tidies after himself. Harry doesn’t bother Louis and he pays his share in time. The ideal flatmate. The only problem is: Harry hates Louis. This will be very lovely Christmas.

❅ room for your love underneath this tree | we_are_the_same | Christmas - famous/famous - strangers to lovers - fluff - no smut- first meetings - 11k “IwannameetHarryStyles,” Daisy mumbles, and Louis blinks. “What?” “She says she wants to meet Harry Styles.” Phoebe pipes up, and Louis blinks again, absently switches the camera to himself because he knows that his followers will want to catch his baffled expression. “You-” he starts, and then stops himself, because he did tell her she could ask for anything she wanted, and how can he go back on his word and tell her that he doesn’t actually have the power to make that happen? Because Harry Styles is -- he’s next level kind of famous. Louis has two million subscribers on his YouTube, but Harry has eighteen times as many followers on his Twitter alone. He’s had three number one hits in the last year, and his last album had charted at the top spot for a record breaking 27 weeks. He’s a singer, actor and philanthropist, and there is no way in hell that Louis can get him to come meet Daisy for Christmas. So of course he laughs, even if it’s a little bit breathless, and nods at her. “One Harry Styles for Christmas, coming right up.”

❅ Something Carries On | blue_marauder | Christmas- angst - fluff - minor character death - anxiety - strangers to lovers - 18k Louis would do anything to escape the prison of his emotions around the holidays. He would even go so far as to abandon his remaining family members and go on a trip to Greece, seeing as they're better off without his holiday angst anyway. While on his trip, Louis meets a kind and vulnerable stranger who manages to break through his defenses.

❅ blinded by the sparks | wallstracktwo | angst - fluff - smut - 22k "You can’t even keep your lies straight. Mike has the memory of an elephant and can remember every single detail about every single person he’s ever met, so don’t stand there and tell me that he mixed you up with someone else.” He took back Harry’s cigarette. “I saw you exchanging lower chips for higher ones. I saw you counting the cards. There is no fucking way you won seven thousand dollars tonight honestly. And so I will repeat myself — I want in. Fifty-fifty.” Harry was completely taken aback by the stunningly attractive man standing in front of him. He made several attempts to say something — opening and closing his mouth at least twice before he was finally able to string a few words together. “What? No. No way. No. Sorry, but I work alone.” That was the truth too — he had never trusted anyone enough to let them get close, especially when it came to his scamming, so having a partner was completely, utterly out of the question. “Don’t you think you need someone on the…” Louis’ tongue darted out, licking his lips as his eyes flickered to Harry’s mouth, one eyebrow cocking up. “...inside.” Or - Harry is a scammer who drifts from casino to casino. Louis is the new waiter who wants in on the scam.

❅ The Golden Prince | behappyhl | royalty - mistaken identity - strangers to lovers - grief/mourning -19k When He arrives in London, he’s speechless. It’s so different from his little hometown, he can’t help the feeling that it is an unknown planet. Everything is bigger; The streets, the buildings, the stores. The people are always running somewhere, always in a hurry. Harry instantly feels out of place. Or, Harry lives a perfectly normal life until he gets a life changing job opportunity.

❅ somewhere in between | soldouthaz | dom/sub - strangers to lovers - 43k Louis wakes up early. He brushes his teeth and can only stomach a piece of toast for breakfast, dressing quickly and heading for the car. He pulls into the parking lot of the Department of Dominance and Submission just as they’re unlocking the doors. It takes him all of an hour in the uncomfortable chairs to fill out the paperwork to the best and most accurate of his ability, handing it over to the receptionist as soon as he’s finished and wiping his sweaty palms on his business trousers. There’s a high chance that within ten to fifteen business days, Louis will be matched with a dominant. Shit.

❅ tastes like summer, smiles like may | outropeace | a/b/o - historical - hate to love - royalty - arranged marriage - slow burn - unrequited love - angst - 47k “Is this true?” Harry grabbed the beta by the shoulders. “Bryce, where did you hear that?” “There’s rumors going around the castle,” he smirked. “stories about his beauty and his cold attitude. They know he is an omega only because of his scent, but he has never had a heat.” “Do you know what this means?” Bryce smirk grew into a big smile. “He can’t give you an heir.” A cold prince, an alpha with nothing left to lose and a kingdom with a secret.

❅ sweet like honey | falsegoodnight | college/university - roommates - friends to lovers - friends with benefits - amateur porn - minor angst - 33k Weeks of flat shopping with their limited budget with Louis as a librarian aid and Harry as a barista and arguments about whether a balcony or extended bathroom suite were more important (Harry wanted to be able to feel the crisp night’s air and watch the sun set and Louis just wanted to take long bubble baths) led to them stumbling across the perfect fit. A small flat only ten minutes from campus with a cramped but lovely balcony and an included bath. It’s affordable too… well, sort of. But they always manage. Louis picks up more shifts as an aid, adapting a habit of bringing his Psych textbooks and homework with him to finish in between duties, and later his script so he can quietly practice lines with little distraction. Harry also increases his number of shifts at the cafe and valiantly endures the nasty customers who for some reason flock to their establishment like moths to a flame. For a while, it’s enough. - Or, Harry and Louis need money and they find an unconventional solution in the form of PornHub. It’s not supposed to be a big deal.

[valentinesdiaries]

Dancing with the devil  (Ethan x F!MC)

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Casey Valentine) x Dr. Tobias Carrick 

Word count: 5,000+ 

Warning: Some adult language. Angst.

Premise: When Casey has a conversation with Ethan about their relationship, things don't end well. A date at the bar with Tobias Carrick can make things worse or warm things up. (This is after chapter 8 of Open Heart 2).

Author’s Note: This is my first Open Heart fanfic and English is not my native language. Sorry for any grammatical errors and let me know in the comments what you think.

Tags: @ohramsey​ - @schnitzelbutterfingers​ - @binny1985​ - @openheart12​

The air was starting to cool a little in Boston again. Casey Valentine ordered a hot chocolate at  Edenbrook’s cafeteria that morning, hoping to warm her body.

Her hands were more frozen than usual. As she walked down the halls, she found Ethan Ramsey, standing at the door to the diagnostic room, seeing something on his phone.

- Hey. -  She whispered as she opened the door, and Ethan, distracted, followed behind.

- I think you and I have a few things to discuss. -  said Casey, after she sat down at the table and took a sip of her drink.

- Yes, and I need to be direct - said Ramsey in a different tone. He was a little more irritated than usual, with his intense blue eyes trying to avoid contact with Casey. - I'm sorry about yesterday. I was in very mixed emotions because of the game and after the thing with my dad, you helped me ... I shouldn't have kissed you. It feels like I'm using you and trying to take advantage of you when I do not...

- When you're not ready to commit. I get it. I'm not a 17-year-old girl being deceived. But I really thought that this time Ethan, this time you would learn something, that you could see me more than that. More than a resident. More than a friend. 

Ethan sighed, pulling his hair back and finally looking into the doctor's captivating green eyes in front of him.

Before he said anything, Baz and June came into the room with the patient's chart and complained about the broken CT scan machine. He gave a heavy sigh and walked away from Valentine, who stared at the table, lost in thought.

 - So, Valentine, do a blood test before we can take the patient to a CT scan, okay? - Ramsey says, seeing her eyes get lost in the moment.

 - Yes Doctor Ramsey - Casey left the room with a chest so heavy that she felt like she was collapsing. How could he be such an idiot, such a insensible man? After everything she did for him? She wondered in the hall before bumping into Jackie Varna, who didn't look good and was holding a form from Pancea Lab.

- Hey, you look like crap -  Jackie said, playing with Casey's hair

- You too. Is that pharmaceutical bitch bothering you again?

- Not for so long. Do you want to drink later? My shift ends 9. I really need to drink.

- Sure, mine ends at 8, but I wait for you in Donahue's. I need to drink until I forget that men exist - Casey said

- Jesus, ask Reggie for some free shots. You need this. Jackie joked. Casey laughed and went into the patient's room to run the tests.

*******************

The clock hit 8:35 when Casey was sitting at the Donahue's counter. She was wearing a little red dress that made her dark brown hair and green eyes brighter.

- Alone tonight, doctor? - Reggie said, putting two drops of bourbon on the rocks for Casey.

- Not for so long. My friend will come soon - She said and saw Reggie attending to other people.

- Is this place occupied? - A male voice asked and Casey recognized that voice. It was him. What was he doing here?

- No -  She answered and took a sip of her drink. - What makes you drive across town? Did you come to get more of my patients, Dr. Carrick?

Tobias Carrick smiles provocatively. His blue eyes were intense, but not as sweet as Ethan. His tanned skin made his smile look a little brighter than normal

- I was passing through the area and I want to visit the famous  Edenbrook  bar. Your shift is over and mine too. I thought I could buy you a drink, but I see you already drinking whiskey. Ethan's favorite.

- Sure, because Ramsey is the only person who can drink whiskey. If you want to become useful here, buy me a few shots of tequila and leave me alone.

She looks at Tobias with a flaming look, while he asks Reggie for the six shots with a smile on his face. She felt her purse vibrating. A message from Jackie.

"Sorry V.

My patient got worse. I need to stay here. See you at home later.

Jackie “

- Great -  She murmured to herself as she felt the tequila liquid running down her throat. - My friend just dumped me.

- I know I'm not your favorite person, but I'm really nice if you know me - Tobias talks while drinking one of the doses - Or at least drink with me.

- You are the devil - Casey said - Tell me, Carrick, why are you really here? It's not like you're going to get me drunk and talk about my team or Ethan's bullshit and your drama history. I'm out, I don't want to play that game.

- Is it the only thought he speaks or thinks right? Medicine? Patients? The hospital? - Carrick said - I know Ethan. This is his life, but it is exhausting for everyone who tries to be a part of it. Even if it's a friend or a girl, he puts his medical ethics, thoughts and desires above everything else.

- You think you’re different? - Casey asked.

- I know I am. I was different at college that time and I am now. See, this is my job, but this is not my life. I like to travel and sailing, play soccer with my mates and flirts with pretty girls. That's why Ethan is a better doctor than me, but I got the good parts - Carrick said, looking at her. She shivered down her spine, and shook her hair out of spot. 

- If you're going out with him, I'll stop, I don't want to make you uncomfortable.

- We have nothing. We are nothing. But that doesn't mean you can show your cute face and tell me that I'm pretty like something is going to happen. It is not. You, me, enemies, understand?

- Ah, so you think I'm cute? This is a good thing - She rolled her eyes listening - But yes, I understand, I am the Devil, Lucifer, Doctor Evil. Let's see how long the little angel doesn’t commit any sin - He said, looking across the bar - Your friends are here.

She saw Elijah Greene and Bryce Lahela in the beer garden, where they played on the pool table. Casey got up from the counter, took one last look at Carrick and crossed to the other side of the bar, where her friends were.

- If this guy is pissing you off, I can fix it -  Lahela said, seeing Casey approach.

- No, I got tequila for free, nothing more. She said while watching the boys playing pool. Tobias was watching her every move.

A song from The Weeknd was playing in the background. Valentine drank too much. The guys were sitting and talking about a stupid video game and her mind was on the movement that Tobias' eyes were making to meet hers. The way he smiled, as if he knew what would happen next.

Her mind was confused and she spoke to the boys that she were going to the bathroom. She paced back and forth, close to where Tobias was sitting. Their eyes met, he followed her red dress to the bathroom with his eyes, devouring it.

 He waited a little and followed her behind. Casey was looking at herself in the mirror. Her brown hair was a little messy and her lipstick was long gone.

Without warning, Carrick opened the door.

They said nothing. They keep looking at each other in that small place, with their bodies touching, until she made a move and pressed her lips against his with urgency and violence.

The kiss was different, but it was hot. It was intense. Tobias did not move away from her and explored her body under the dress with his hands.

Casey let out a small moan when he pressed a finger on her panties, feeling the wet fabric. - I could rip your panties off and fuck you right here in this dirty bathroom bar, Valentine.

Her mind woke up and realized what she is about to do. She broke the kiss, not fast or furious, but conscious. Tobias received the signal and stopped his hand, pulling it and trying to calm his excitement. Casey looks him in the eye very seriously.

 - It never happened.

She came out of the bathroom, waved to her friends and asked for an Uber to  go home.

*************

The next morning, Casey woke up with a hangover and regret. What happened to Carrick was hot

But it was Tobias, the Tobias, who stole her patient. The doctor who is Ethan's ex-friend / current enemy.

 She showered and went straight to the hospital. She should have been the first to arrive at the diagnostic team's office, but everyone was already there, including Ethan, and June was holding a bouquet of red roses.

It looks like someone has an admirer, how romantic -  said June Hirati ironic, looking at Ethan.

Oh shit.

He wrote a card.

"Valentine,

I hoped you enjoyed your dance with the devil last night.

You are a beautiful corrupted little angel.

T. "

Her mind was going crazy. Ethan read? Did June recognize Tobias' handwriting?

 - So who's the lucky one? - Baz joked, breaking the mood of the room. Ramsey stopped looking and started making coffee.

- A guy from my hometown. He knows I work here and is trying to get in touch again - She lied. Ethan laughed a little.

- Anyway, we lost valuable time, while Dr. Valentine keeps talking about her love life, which, like the last time I checked, will not help save the lives of patients. So, please, can we focus on work?

Ethan said, upset about everything. As Casey moved into the room, he pressed his hand on her arm.

- Ah, and Valentine, this is a workplace. I know you may be having trouble understanding this, but every guy who slept with you can't send a gift or any shit to my office. Am I clear?

She wanted to shout at him how ignorant and rude he was being with her.

- Clear as water, Dr. Ramsey. I know this is a workplace. After all, I learned from the most ethical doctor.

[openheartchoices]

Fake (Ethan Ramsey x MC)

Open Heart: Ethan Ramsey x f!MC (Olivia Summers)

Words: 4.9k words

Warnings: some family angst.

Summary: Olivia needs to prove to her family that she can, in fact, get a boyfriend. Even if it’s fake.

A/N: hi guys! So I took a month off from writing. It started because of some health issues, I’m perfectly fine now, but when I sat down to write, I decided to take more time off to get more inspiration and creativity flowing through me because it was nonexistent. However, I’m here now, and I have so much to get done, and I’m happy to be back! lots of love and happy reading! <3

“Does seven work? I figured that should be enough time for everyone to get settled in. I don't even know how you convinced Mom and Dad to come up here,” Olivia told her sister through the phone.

“Yeah, that’s fine,” Octavia replied. “It wasn’t as hard as I thought it’d be. They complained about having to take time off from work, but I eventually talked them into it.” She paused for a minute. “Are you bringing anyone tonight?”

“To dinner?” Olivia asked. “Not that I’m aware of.”

“I just assumed you’d have a guy for us to meet. You haven’t introduced us to one since, how long ago? When you were in college?”

Olivia frowned. As much as she hated to admit it, her younger sister was right. The last guy that Olivia had brought home to meet her family was during her senior year of college. The guy had terrible manners, eyed Octavia the entire duration of dinner, and sneezed into her brother’s plate of food. Needless to say, she never brought him around again and broke up with him.

She’d been on a few dates through medical school, but it had never went anywhere. Olivia hadn’t even tried to put herself out there because of a certain doctor that she couldn’t, and didn’t, want to get rid of.

However, Olivia wasn’t going to let her family believe that she, at age twenty-eight, was unable to get a boyfriend. Octavia was already married with a daughter while her brother was about to graduate from college still in a steady relationship with the girl he had been dating since he was sixteen. She had to look like somewhat had her life together.

“I do have a boyfriend,” Olivia spoke up, hoping that this wouldn’t backfire on her. “It’s fairly new though.”

She could almost see Octavia’s amusement through the phone. “Really? Because I just asked if you were bringing anyone, and you said no.”

“This is a family dinner. You’re not even bringing your own husband, Octavia, and Oliver said that Camila wasn’t coming. I thought it was just going to be us.”

“My own husband isn’t coming, Olivia, because I have a baby at home that I don’t want to keep in the car for a long drive to Boston. Camila isn’t coming because she’s not even in the country right now. I’m pretty sure that everyone would be glad if you brought someone,” Octavia replied.

Olivia cleared her throat. “Well, he works a lot, and I didn’t give him any notice because I wasn’t aware this dinner was an excuse for everyone to harass me on my love life. He probably can’t make it.”

“Ask him anyway. Where does he work?”

Olivia froze. Where did her fake boyfriend work? What was a job that required many hours? She had to think of a profession quickly, but only one thing came to mind. “Um, Edenbrook.”

“Oh, he works with you? Well, what does he do?” Octavia was firing questions off left and right.

“He, uh, does what any doctor does, Octavia,” Olivia said, trying to keep herself calm.

She knew this probably wasn’t a good idea. Olivia knew she didn’t have a love life. The closest thing to a love life she had was Ethan who, might she add, had just gotten back from the Amazon, and he still hadn’t spoken more than a few formal and professional sentences to her.

Octavia wasn’t giving up though. “What’s his name?”

Before Olivia could think, she blurted out, “Ethan.”

“Great! I feel like I know him already,” Octavia teasingly said. “I’ll see both of you at dinner.”

Olivia couldn’t get another word in before Octavia ended the call. She looked around the locker room she stood in to make sure that no one else heard the phone call before running a hand through her hair.

She couldn’t believe she had just basically implied that she was dating her boss. Octavia would know she was lying if she showed up to dinner without a doctor named Ethan by her side, but Olivia also knew it was going to be entirely hard, and a little crazy, to get Ethan to come to a family dinner and pretend to be her boyfriend.

On another note, Ethan and Olivia weren’t even on good terms. Or at least that’s what Olivia thought. Ethan had disappeared without a word to the Amazon with zero contact the entire time he was gone. She had spoken to him briefly, but it was like he had put a wall up around himself.

Olivia glanced down to the time on her phone. Dinner was at seven, her shift had just ended, and she had two hours to get back to the apartment, get ready, and make it on time. The tricky part was going to be to ask Ethan to come to dinner with her.

She left the locker room having changed out of her scrubs. Wringing her hands nervously together and walking around, Olivia looked everywhere in an attempt to find her fake boyfriend, hoping that he was on the same floor currently and that she wouldn’t have to track him down or run to his office.

Luckily for her, she caught him coming out of a room and reviewing charts at the perfect time. Clearing her throat, she ran a hand through her messy hair and made her way over to him.

He still hadn’t noticed her, his eyes glued to the paper in front of him. “Dr. Ramsey, do you have a minute?”

Ethan glanced at her before closing the chart, giving Olivia his full attention. “What is it, Summers?”

People were walking all around them, making Olivia slightly nervous to ask him what she needed to. “Can we talk, like, not in the middle of everyone?”

He frowned and crossed his arms. “I don’t have time to-“

“Please?”

All it took was one look at her pleading face before Ethan sighed. “Fine. Lead the way.”

Olivia led him into the closest on-call room. The room was especially dark, and neither of them bothered to turn a light on. She turned to him, suddenly feeling even more nervous now that they were alone.

“What time is your shift over?”

Ethan glanced down at his watch. “Fifteen minutes ago. I was on my way to my office to get some work done before you dragged me in here.”

“Sorry,” she grimaced. “Do you have plans tonight?”

“I just told you I was going to do some work I’m behind on. Why?” He asked slowly, realizing that there was something going on that he didn’t know about.

Looking anywhere but his eyes, Olivia said, “Would you want to come to dinner with me tonight?”

Ethan, still not sure what was going on, raised his eyebrows, urging her to keep going.

“And my family?”

“Why do you want me to come to dinner with you and your family? I thought your family was in North Carolina. What are they doing in Boston?”

Olivia sighed. “They came to visit me. I sort of, maybe, kind of… told my sister I had a boyfriend.”

That caught his attention. “Since when do you have a boyfriend?”

“That’s the thing,” she continued. “I don’t. But I may or may not have told her that his name is Ethan, and he’s a doctor at Edenbrook, so it would be really great if you could, y’know, come to dinner, pretend to be my boyfriend for a little bit, and then we’ll never have to bring this up again.”

Ethan looked at the blonde doctor incredulously. “You told your sister that we’re dating?”

Olivia opened and closed her mouth a few times. “Well, I- not exactly. She doesn’t know who you are.” She took one more look at Ethan’s face before deciding to not defend herself further. “Okay, yeah, I told my sister that we’re dating.”

“Why would you tell your sister that we’re together? Olivia, you can’t live out a lie,” Ethan scolded her, making her start to feel guilty. “A small lie always turns into an even bigger lie."

Olivia bit her lip. “I haven’t had one good thing to tell my family about since I started working here. My sister’s been married for a year and just had a baby. My brother will be graduating from Columbia which is the same school my grandfather and my dad went to. It’s a big deal in our house. I know that lying to my family isn’t okay, but I need something to look like I’m not a major loser and that I have something good going for me besides work.”

Ethan still hadn’t said anything which was making Olivia worried. The last thing she wanted to do was tell her sister she was, indeed, lying. If Ethan didn’t come to this dinner and pretend just for her, she didn’t know what she going to do.

She stepped closer, laid a hand on his chest, and looked up at him. “Please, Ethan?”

The older doctor sighed. Olivia couldn’t tell what was going on his mind until he removed her hand and stepped back, clearing his throat. “You shouldn’t have to lie to your family. Just tell them it was a misunderstanding. They’re your family. They’ll understand if you tell them what you just told me.”

Olivia huffed. “Okay, I understand. I’ll just go ask Bryce to pretend his name is Ethan for the night. I’m sure he’d be more than willing to help me out. Have a great rest of your day, Dr. Ramsey.”

Olivia walked around him with a smirk on her face that she hid from him. In her head, she counted down the seconds until he finally yelled out, “Wait.”

With her hand wrapped around the door knob, she kept her back to him. “Yes?”

“Lahela is not going to pretend to be me. I’ll go to the dinner, but this is a one-time thing, Rookie.”

Olivia grinned as she turned around. She knew pulling the Bryce card would work. “Thank you so much. Can you pick me up? We’ll look more legit if we show up together.”

“I can do that,” Ethan sighed, still not liking the idea of lying. “What time?”

“Around six forty. The restaurant is just a few minutes down the road from my apartment. Can you text me when you get there? Sienna, Elijah, Jackie, and Aurora are all working tonight, and I’m particularly terrible at hearing anyone outside.”

Grimacing, Ethan said, “I hate texting.”

“Then call me, email me, or whatever, but know that I really appreciate this, Ethan. I’m just asking for tonight,” she said softly.

She wouldn’t lie and say that a small part of her wasn’t overjoyed with the fact that she was going to get to pretend she was dating Ethan Ramsey. Many people would be overjoyed with the situation she was in. It somehow felt real to her even though it was so far from being reality.

However, for the night, she could pretend that this was her life.

**

“Shoes, shoes, shoes. Where did I put my shoes?” Olivia frantically muttered to herself, pacing all around her bedroom in an attempt to find the wedges she had thought she laid on her bed only minutes earlier.

After finally finding them, she slipped them on with ease as her phone dinged. Olivia assumed it was Ethan, but then again, he did hate texting. With one quick glance to her phone that laid beside her, she did read a short text from Ethan saying he was outside.

She took one more good, quick glance in the mirror. Olivia did have to admit that she had outdone herself. Dinner was at a new Italian restaurant that wasn’t relatively a place that required a lot of effort on appearance. However, she did want to look nice considering everything including not only impressing her parents, but Ethan as well.

Olivia rushed out of her bedroom to open the apartment door with ease. Ethan stood outside, his left hand fumbling over the sleeve of his sweater. He glanced up when she finally opened the door. “Ready?”

She nodded as they stepped outside. Olivia locked the door back before dropping her keys down into her purse. “Let’s go.”

“You, uh, look nice,” Ethan awkwardly commented.

Olivia grinned. “Thanks. You look nice, too.”

Olivia was a little proud of herself. In record time, she had managed to pull together a cute outfit consisting of a light pink dress and a thick, white cardigan over it to shield her from the cold January air. She had straightened her hair rather than curl it as usual, and surprisingly, she didn’t hate it.

Another thing she found that she didn’t hate was Ethan opening up her car door. She gave him a confused look, but smiled nonetheless. “Well, thanks. Do you know how long it’s been since someone has opened a car door for me?”

He laughed. “No, I don’t.”

Olivia settled into the leather seat as she rubbed her cold hands together in an attempt to get some blood flowing to them. She unlocked her phone to reveal a missed call from Octavia and then a text from her that told Olivia that she was almost there.

“So,” Ethan said as he started up the car, “tell me what I need to know.”

Olivia furrowed her brow. “What do you mean?”

He started backing up. “If I’m going to be your fake boyfriend, I’m going to need to know your family.”

“Um, there’s my sister, Octavia. She’s three years younger than me. She’s a teacher, married, and just had a baby. Then there’s my brother, Oliver. He’s a senior at Columbia and majoring in political science. My mom’s a photographer and my dad is a lawyer,” she told him. “Oh, and they don’t know about my hearing that happened a while back, so please don’t bring that up. Also, don’t mention that you’re my boss. Oh! And don’t tell them-“

“Okay!” He cut her off. “I get it. So basically, don’t bring up anything that would make them frown upon you?”

“Yes! Exactly,” Olivia replied, patting his on the shoulder. “That’s exactly right.”

“Why didn’t you tell them about your hearing?” He asked, glancing over at her out of the corner of his eye.

Olivia sighed. “I don’t know. I guess it’s just that I’ve brought them nothing but bad news for years. If they found out about what a mess my intern year was then it would be nothing but more disappointment from them. I’m tired of never giving them anything good.”

“It’s not bad news. You have bad days and bad times. It’s what makes you human. You can’t be perfect.”

“That’s coming from someone who’s practically perfect himself,” Olivia pointed out.

Ethan laughed. “I’m far from perfect. I’ve made my fair share of mistakes. You have your whole life and your whole career ahead of you, Liv. It’s okay to make mistakes. Live a little instead of caring about what everyone thinks about you.”

A moment of silence passed by as Olivia sat in the passenger seat, looking out the window at the passing town and not saying a word until warmth flashed through her hand that rested on the edge of her seat. She didn’t even have to look down because she already knew what the warmth was.

“We aren’t in public yet. You don’t have to hold my hand,” she joked.

“I know. I just want to.”

Olivia turned her head while biting back the large smile growing on her face. However, she couldn’t hold it in. Even if the circumstances were a little odd, this was all Olivia wanted out of the doctor sitting across from her. She knew he wanted it, too, even if he was less vocal about it. Actions spoke louder than words, and that’s what Olivia gathered from Ethan in the time she had known him.

“That’s it up ahead,” Olivia told him. “Turn right.”

Ethan pulled into the restaurant, reluctantly letting go of Olivia hand. He looked over to Olivia who he could tell was silently flipping out. “Olivia?”

“Yes?”

“Are we going to go inside or just sit here?”

She pondered for a moment. “We could just sit here.”

Olivia eventually did get out of the car, her arms wrapped tightly around her midsection. She walked alongside Ethan in the dark into the bright room of the restaurant, trying her hardest to not let her nerves get the best of her.

Frowning, Ethan asked, “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I just haven’t seen my parents since my medical school graduation. Just flipping out a little bit. I’m fine,” Olivia rambled.

She hadn’t been home to see her parents since making the move to Boston while her parents hadn’t been to Boston to see her since she had moved. Olivia had seen her sister who made sure to come visit every so often while she saw her brother quite often considering he was just a few hours away at Columbia.

Her and her parents rarely kept in touch. A few awkward phone calls, texts, and emails here and there, but it was only ever Olivia making the effort to keep in touch. She was sure that if she stopped reaching out to them, they’d never talk to her again.

Spotting her sister’s dyed, chestnut hair, her brother’s messy blonde curls, and two strict faces, Olivia knew that was the table she had been looking for. Reluctantly, she grabbed Ethan’s hand, leading him on the way over.

Her sister was the first to notice Olivia when she finally got to the table. Octavia jumped up out of her seat sporting a large grin on her face as her arms wrapped tightly around her big sister. “It’s so good to see you!”

Olivia pulled away from her sister and smiled. “Your hair looks so good in person. I love it.”

“Thank you. It took many appointments to get it to this color, but I love it,” Octavia replied before her eyes darted over to Ethan who stood behind Olivia. She looked to Olivia with excitement, lowering her voice. “I thought you were just making him up. I approve already. Just look at the way he’s standing. He’s very attractive. You did really well on-“

“Okay, Octavia,” Olivia cut her off with a chuckle, “you’re married with a baby, for one, and two, I was not making him up. He’s very real.”

Octavia threw her hands up in surrender. “Okay, fine.”

Oliver was the next to throw Olivia into a warm hug. “Good to see you, Liv.”

Olivia repeated the same before pulling back from her brother. She cleared her throat in an attempt to get her family’s attention. “I have someone I’d like for you all to meet. This is Ethan.”

She pulled at Ethan’s arm to guide him up to stand beside her. With his hands in his pockets, he announced. “It’s really nice to meet Olivia’s family after hearing her talk so much about you all.”

Olivia had to admit that she was impressed. He was really playing the fake boyfriend card well for not wanting to do it in the first place.

Ethan shook hands with Oliver, but Octavia pulled him into a hug while muttering something along the lines of him practically being family. Olivia wanted to dig herself into a hole at how uncomfortable Ethan probably was.

However, Ethan didn’t seem to be uncomfortable, just a little surprised, as he returned Octavia’s hug. Olivia’s parents still hadn’t said a word, but both smiled, which was surprising to Olivia, before both shaking his hand as well.

Olivia and Ethan sat down at the two empty seats across her Olivia’s parents. Octavia sat at one head of the table while Oliver sat at the other while looking at the menu.

“How are you, Olivia? You haven’t called in a while, and the last time you called, you sure didn’t mention a boyfriend,” her mother said smoothly, giving Olivia a small smile.

“Just busy, Mom,” Olivia replied. “I have a job that doesn’t give me a lot of free time.”

“Your daughter is an incredible doctor. She’s truly the bright future of Edenbrook,” Ethan piped in.

Olivia laughed gently. “You tell that to everyone.”

“Because it’s true,” he said with a soft smile, looking straight into her eyes.

Olivia thought her heart was going to stop with the look he gave her. She wasn’t sure if this was just him pretending or him being one hundred percent serious. It didn’t matter though because in that moment, Olivia felt like her and Ethan were the only people in the room.

After everyone had ordered their food and received their drinks, Octavia turned her attention on Ethan. “So how did you and Olivia meet?”

Olivia froze. She hadn’t thought to come up with a backstory of their fake relationship to Ethan. She silently prayed that he wouldn’t blank up. Ethan was good under pressure, so she shouldn’t have worried, but she really couldn’t help it.

“On her first day, she ran over to help me with a patient that had fallen unconscious to the floor. We ended up performing an emergency surgical procedure. I told her that her examination was superficial and slow,” Ethan laughed.

Olivia grinned, knowing he was telling the real story of how they met. “If I remember correctly, you also told me that my scalpel technique was ‘amateur at best’ to which I confronted you about it.”

“Yeah, I did say that, but Olivia’s come a long way since that day. She’s passionate about her work, and it’s very obvious.”

Before Olivia could say anything else, her father jumped in on the conversation. “Did you always know you wanted to be a doctor, Ethan?”

“Not always. I wanted to be a detective for a while.”

“I always told Olivia she didn’t need to be a doctor. She constantly changed her mind about what she wanted to be. Now, Oliver has always known he’s wanted to be a lawyer while Octavia has always known that teaching was what she wanted to do with her life. Olivia, well, she jumped around a lot,” her dad replied.

Ethan frowned as his eyes glanced all around the table while no one said anything. For one of the first times, Ethan couldn’t read the look on Olivia’s face. She sat completely silent, her hands fiddling with the end of her cardigan under the table.

He slowly grabbed her hand under the table, intertwined their fingers, and squeezed her hand in an effort to tell her that it was okay. Olivia, obviously grateful, squeezed back in return while their hands still laid intertwined on Olivia’s lap.

“I didn’t know, Dad, because you and Mom were pressuring me into following in Dad’s footsteps from as early as middle school. Being a doctor is what I’ve always wanted to do. I just didn’t know if I should listen to you and Mom or listen to myself for once in my life,” Olivia replied cooly, taking a sip of her water and leaning back into her chair.

Olivia’s mom nodded. “We pushed you to be the best version of yourself, Olivia. It was never meant to be something bad to make you upset. We had so much faith in you. At least Oliver carried out your dad’s legacy.”

Ethan’s eyes went wide as the entire table went silent. Anger filled him as he realized no one was going to say anything. Not even Olivia as she sunk deeper into her seat, her hair falling from being tucked behind her ears.

“Can you both just stop?” Olivia asked. “I am happy with how my life has turned out. I didn’t do it to make either of you happy. I did it for me and the opportunity to help people. Can we just have a nice dinner and not bring up how disappointed you are in me for going into a career that I have so much passion for instead of a career that I was never interested in doing in the slightest bit?”

“It’s not that we’re disappointed that you became a doctor. It’s that you were supposed to take over my firm once I retired. It was always the plan,” her dad said. “But I knew that plan was over when you got rejected from Columbia.”

“Dad, stop,” Oliver cut in. “That’s low.”

The waiter brought out the appetizers as Olivia stood up, her hand jerking from Ethan’s and all eyes on her. “Stop treating me like I’m some kind of disappointment. This is why I don’t come back home to visit. I’m going to my apartment. Have a nice night or don’t. I could care less.”

Before anyone could say anything, Olivia was already on her way to the front door. She opened it and slammed it with force. Ethan turned back to the family sitting around the table. Oliver was glaring at his father while Octavia sat with a hand on her head, avoiding any eye contact.

“You two always do this,” Octavia said quietly, finally looking up to talk to her parents. “You start up a ridiculous fight because you’re mad Olivia didn’t do what you wanted her to and then you run her away.”

“He never told her she had to leave,” her mother spoke up. “Olivia just takes this stuff to heart.”

Ethan had already had enough. He was the next to stand up, glaring at both of Olivia’s parents. “You have an amazingly brilliant, extremely gifted, and incredibly kind daughter with a big heart that sees nothing but the good in everyone. If you’d take the time to look over the fact she did what she wanted to do with her life, you’d see how special she really is. Instead of doing that, you overlook her because you’re angry she isn’t didn’t do what her father did. And, in all honesty, I can see why she wouldn’t want to carry on the family legacy, no offense, Oliver.”

“None taken,” Oliver piped in.

“The next time you want to ridicule your daughter and degrade her for no big deal, think about what you’re doing. Olivia is a kind and forgiving person, but there’s only so much you can throw her way until you’ve destroyed what’s left of your relationship with her.” With that, Ethan turned his back to the table, walking briskly to get outside and find Olivia.

He did find Olivia after searching the entire parking lot and his car for her. She was walking up the alongside the road, her hair blowing from the cold air with her arms crossed.

“Where are you going?” He asked when he had finally caught up with her.

“I’m walking home,” she responded.

Ethan grabbed her wrist, making her come to a complete stop and turn around slowly. “Let’s go back to my car. I’ll drive you home and- wait, hey, don’t cry.”

“I’m not crying,” Olivia muttered, angrily reaching up to wipe away a tear.

“They’re not worth it, and they sure aren’t worthy of your tears, okay?” Ethan softly told her.

Ethan slowly initiated a hug, wrapping his arms around Olivia’s waist as she eventually gave in with one arm around his neck and the other under his arm, gripping the soft fabric of his sweater. She didn’t sob or scream, but rather quietly cried and basked in the comfort of the doctor in front of her.

“It isn’t fair,” Olivia whispered. “It’s been like this for as long as I can remember. I never do anything right in their eyes. I just want to be good enough for them, Ethan. Why can’t I be? I don’t get it.”

“It isn’t you, Liv. It’s them. You’re more than good enough for them. Don’t let them affect you like that. And just in case you haven’t heard it in a while, I’m proud of you for everything. Including standing up to your parents tonight,” he said.

Olivia sniffled and pulled back to look Ethan in the eyes. “Thank you. And thank you for doing this even though it was a bit of a mess. You didn’t even get to eat.”

He laughed and gave Olivia a grin. “Well, we could go back to my car instead of walking to your apartment in the middle of January, then we can go get something to eat with just us.”

“I would very much like that.”

There was still a lot to discuss between the two of them, Olivia knew that, but she held on to the bubble they were in. Talking about them would come later. But for the rest of the night, Olivia was going to go with her fake boyfriend and pretend, just for tonight, that it was reality instead of something nonexistent.

tags: @kaavyaethanramsey​ @nooruleman​ @openheart12​ @missmiimiie​ @bellcat2010​ @perriewinklenerdie​ @ethandaddyramsey​ @trappedinfandoms​ @queencarb​

[brycelahelalover]

Labor of love

Pairing: Bryce × f!MC (Tesse Sterling)

Bryce was watching the TV when he heard the clatter in the kitchen. He hurried over to find Tesse clutching her pregnant bully with a look of shock on her face. His eyes trealed down her legs to see a pool on the floor between them.

"My water broke." Tesse said after a few beats.

"But how? The Ob-Gyn said it'll be a couple of weeks before you're due."

"I know.. Bryce, I'm not ready for this. I haven't prepared a delivery bag, plus I still haven't psyched myself into processing that I'm going to be a mother." Tesse responded, panicked.

"It's okay. Everything is going to be okay. I'll go put together a bag. As for your processing you can do it in the way to the hospital."

"Are you making fun of me?" Tesse asked, enraged.

"Tesse, no. Even I'm not dumb enough to make light of THIS situation."

"Yeah, well. You better be."

"Okay, I'll call an uber while I prepare the bag." Said Bryce, ignoring her sass.

"And I'll go change. After all I can't go back to the hospital after our honeymoon, or what we spent of it, looking like this."

Bryce turned to their room, rolling his eyes and muttering under his breath.

"Priorities."

"I heard that."

After an uber ride filled with Tesse' s whimpering every time a contraction hits her, they made it to the hospital. When they got to the nurse's station, the nurse there asked for the patient name.

"Tesse Lahela. Or wait Tesse Sterling..."

He turns to his wife.

"We still haven't talked about what you want to be called at the hospital."

"Seriously, Bryce? Do I look like i care right now?"

"Okay. We'll go with Tesse Lahela." Bryce informs the nurse.

"Of course you would go with that."

"Oh my god, Tesse. You just said that you don't care."

"Yeah. But figures that you would go with that."

"You know what? Fine. We'll go with Tesse Sterling instead." He informs the nurse again.

"Happy now?"

"I told you I don't care."

Throwing his hands up, Bryce puts their bag on his shoulder and follows the nurse to their room.

About half an hour after, they heard a knock at the door, and then Dr. Williams, the Ob-Gyn, comes in.

"Hi Tesse, didn't expect to see you intel two weeks." She said.

"Yeah, I didn't either." Tesse responded.

"I know you weren't expecting to go through this now. But it happens more often than you think."

"I know I just.. the contractions are really bad."

"Okay, we'll see how far along you are and than we'll see."

After measuring Tesse, Dr. Williams said.

"Alright, you're not far enough to start the delivery."

"How far?" Bryce asked.

"Just one centimeter."

"Oh my god, seriously?" Now, Tesse asked, looking exhausted.

"It's fine, I'll tell you somethings you can do to make it a little bit faster."

After explaining what to do, the doctor left. And over the next 16 hours, they had other measurements, their friends came over to check on them, and even more complaining from Tesse. It was hard for Bryce seeing his wife going through so much pain and not being able to do anything about it. Probably not as hard as it is for her to go through this but still.. And then finally.

"Alright, you're ready for delivery."

"Oh, finally."

After putting Tesse on the right position, the doctor said.

"Okay... push."

And so it began.

"Push, Tesse, push." Encouraged Bryce.

"Seriously, Bryce. What do you think I'm doing right now?" Snapped Tesse.

"Okay, no need to be mean."

"Bryce.." She whimpered, tears on her eyes.

Bryce regretted it, seeing how much in pain she is.

"It's okay, baby. I'm sorry." He said while kissing her forehead.

"It just hurts so much. I can't..."

"Tesse look at me. You're strong you can do it."

"But.."

"No listen to me you can do it don't you want to see our beautiful baby?"

"I do. Okay.."

And after about 10 minutes of trying, the doctor said.

"Okay, just one last push."

And that's what Tesse did, she pushed as hard as she can. And than, they heard a cry.

"Here he is." The Ob-Gyn said before passing the child over to the nurse to clean him up. And then she turned to the couple.

"You've got yourself one healthy boy."

After a few hours of people coming over to congratulate them and their friends fawning over their newborn, Tesse and Bryce sat in silence with their baby laying on Tesse' s chest, feeding. After a while, Tesse turned to her husband.

"I'm sorry for being mean to you earlier."

Bryce chuckled.

"Who knew you'd be such a bully while in labor?"

"You're talking like you can't be one when you want to be. But seriously, I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. I get it, you were in pain... Though I wouldn't mind if you wanted to make it up to me."

"A baby is not enough for you?"

"One with a few kisses from his mother would be."

The end

So I know that it wasn't that great or thought-out but I don't know... anyway, I would appreciate it if you like, comment and reblog. And if you noticed any medical inaccuracies please tell me since I've never seen a labor and I'm not sure what I'm talking about.

[13-reasons-ideas]

Can’t Go Back Part 16

A/N: This chapter is very Justin-centric. I felt like Addy and Justy needed a day where they didn't need to worry about boys or moms. Just a day to be kids. It’s kind of filler but I like it. It’s a light chapter. As always, feedback is always nice and much love. - Em 

Things were awkward between us for the next week. We had agreed to table the discussion about his dad and had come to a tentative understanding about Justin. We had never had a fight like that before so, we weren’t really sure where the lines were yet. I learned that his dad was a line you don’t cross unless invited. He learned that Justin was a line that was going to run parallel to our relationship, whether he liked it or not. Monty’s behaviour at school was different too. He was a little nicer for people to be around. Not Tyler Down, but I couldn’t really blame him. The kid was fucking creepy. Monty was even sort of polite to Justin.

By the following Monday, things had gone back to normal. Our texts were longer and less to the point. He was… well he was more Monty at school than he was for a few days. His friends didn’t seem to pick up on the change. But I did. He’s trying. I got dressed in in my comfy light wash jeans, because Justin and I were going to the mall after school and paired it with a light pink tank top with an old red and black flannel. The flannel had been sitting at the back of my closet for quite a while. I found it while I was going through and cleaning it out for donations. “Morning Dad.” I called as I heard him pass my room. He cleared his throat and grunted in response. He must have just woken up.

Downstairs, dad was making a cup of coffee while he read the paper. “Morning Addy.” He nodded when he heard me. Definitely just woke up. Grabbing a granola bar for breakfast, I went through and gathered up my books for school. Once they were neatly arranged in my backpack, I set it by the door. My book from last night was still sitting on the island. I took it and flipped it open to my last page since I had a little time to kill before leaving for school. Deciding I would get too lost in the book, I rethought and took it over to my bag to take to school.

“Justin and I are going to the mall after school. He needs help shoe shopping. And I need to grab a few replacement shirts. I had to throw some out that were too old.”

“Have fun. Don’t forget to grab your mom’s prescription on the way home.”

“I won’t. Do we need anything else while we are out?”

“No, we should be okay. I’ll text you if I think of anything today. Your mom will be late today too. One of her students needed to schedule an afterhours meeting.”

“Okay. See you later dad.”

“Bye.”

Justin was early today, which surprised me. At least until I noticed his duffel bag. He must have spent the night at Bryce’s last night. He was mingling with his friends. I waved as I passed them to my locker, not paying anyone much mind. I watched them a bit from across the hall. They were goofing off as usual. Justin’s smile seemed a little forced. I’ll talk to him after school. My eyes scanned the group. When they landed on Monty, I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. And I will admit I may have possibly spent more time than strictly required, simply checking him out. It was during my perusal of his body that I noticed something familiar. A little too familiar. My eyes widened and I looked down. That… that’s… we are wearing the same shirt. Spinning around and opening my locker again, I ripped off the flannel and shoved it in my locker.

Casually making my way over to the group of boys, I made sure to rub my arms like I was cold. “Morning Justin. Morning Boys.” I shivered.

“Morning Addy.” Justin said, as he leaned in to hug me gently.

“Where’s my morning Addy?” Bryce smirked.

“Oh, I’m sorry Bryce. I must have forgotten we say morning to each other. Morning Walker.”

“Morning Addy. Are you cold or are you finally going to tell us all what your secret to doing well in school is?”

“I’m cold. And I’ve shared my secret with you before. It’s called actually opening the books they rent to us and reading them. Hey Justin, do you have an extra sweater? I spilled water on my other shirt like right after I left the house.”

“Yeah, I have one in my locker. Go ahead and grab it.”

“Thanks. Have I told you you’re the best lately?”

“Nope.” He laughed.

“Well, now I have.”

I was in a good mood when lunch rolled around. I nodded to Courtney in the hall on my way to the cafeteria. She was talking to Marcus about one thing or another. Tyler was watching Hannah in a way that had it been anyone else, wouldn’t have been weird. Clay was watching her too. I smiled and waved at him. He nodded back. “Hey Addison.” Tyler called. I turned around and he waved his camera at me. I waved my book in the air like I was busy but stopped for the student life photographer anyway. He snapped his photo and I continued on.

Since I was in a good mood, I didn’t even think twice about sitting with Justin and his friends. “Are we eating at the mall?” Justin asked when I sat down.

“I don’t see why not. I’ll have to stop at Baker Drugs on my way home though. Mum has a refill waiting.”

“Okay.” He nodded and bit into his sandwich. Jeff bounded over to the table.

“Guess who got above a C?” He asked, proudly.

“You?” Anders asked in response.

“Yup. Now I can finally make Clay make a move.”

“He’s going to hate it Jeff.” I said.

“I know. But he needs to put himself out there.”

“Make a move on who?” Monty asked.

“Hannah Baker.” Jeff replied. “Everyone knows he likes her.”

“I don’t really pay attention to the Jensen kid.” He shrugged.

“He hates dances.”

“I know. But a deal is a deal. I get above a C he goes to the dance. Are you going Addy?”

“Wasn’t planning on it, no.”

“Why not?” Bryce asked. I rolled my eyes.

“I hate school dances. The only not crappy part is that Tony is DJing.”

“You have to go. I’m going.” Justin begged with his mouth full.

I shook my head. What is it with boys not chewing their food? “I went to the last one. It’s Bryce’s turn to babysit you.”

“I babysat last time.”

“No, you didn’t. You were sneaking off behind the bleachers with your date. I babysat. Plus, I can’t tie a tie. And neither can Justin. Ergo, your turn.”

“Yes you-.” Justin started. I kicked him under the table.

“I’m not going to the stupid dance. Besides, I have homework.”

“Addison. The dance isn’t for like three weeks.” Jeff complained.

“I know Jeff. But I am not Clay Jensen. I have friends. I have a life.”

“Aren’t you friends with Clay?” Scott asked.

“Yes. So, I know he keeps to himself. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to the dance.”

“You’re not going to the dance yet.” Justin smiled devilishly. I rolled my eyes.

“Did you finish your English paper?”

“Maybe.”

“I’ll take that as a no.”

“Did you?” He challenged. Monty choked on a laugh. Smooth. Bryce quirked his brow.

“Did you just ask her if she finished a homework assignment?”

“Yeah.” He shrugged.

“Yes, I did. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious. Since you’re on me about my homework.”

“Justin. The last time she handed something in late, was like seventh grade because she was out of school the day it was due.” Monty added.

“I remember. She had a stress rash because of it. How do you remember?”

He shrugged. “It had never happened before.” He noticed that? And thought it was important enough to remember? Thankfully before any more questions could be raised, the bell rang.

“I’ll meet you at my locker after school Justin.” He gave me a thumbs up before walking away, already in conversation with Zach about something.

Justin and I drove to the mall, singing along to whatever was on a Spotify artist radio. “Do we want a pretzel now or later?” I asked as I pulled my purse out of my backpack in the car. I had changed back into the flannel from this morning while I waited for my best friend at my locker.

“Now.” We said in unison.

Pretzels in hand, we wandered around the mall for a while. “I need some new shirts. I had to throw a bunch out because they were really old and not able to be donated.”

“You want opinions?”

“Of course.”

“Shoes first?”

“Sure.”

“DSW?” He shrugged and nodded. At the store, we headed straight for the men’s section. I pointed out a few pairs that seemed like they were his style. He made a face at the first couple of pairs and shook his head. Shrugging, I pointed out a pair of Nikes that were on sale. He gave me his best seriously look and I laughed. “They could be nice.”

“Yeah. If I want to look like my feet are three sizes bigger than they are.”

“You know what they say about guys with big feet though Justin.” He flipped me off. “What about these?” This time, he actually tried them on. They were not the right ones.

After a few more busts, we decided it was time to try a different store. Famous Footwear was having a sale. We stopped in there. Once again, we headed straight for the men’s sneakers. He tried a couple of pairs of Converse. Neither of us were very big fans. “White?” I asked, pointing out a pair of Pumas.

“No.” He shot down. I nodded and we kept looking. He picked up a pair of grey and white Nikes. “These are nice.”

“They are.” We found his size and he tried them on. “How do they feel?”

“Good.” He flexed his foot a few times before trying them out to walk. “Yeah, these feel good.” I smiled and we placed them back in the box to go pay.

Shoes in hand, we made a quick pitstop for coffee. Justin brought up the topic of the Winter Formal again while we walked around trying to find some shirts for me. “Are you really not going to go Addy?”

“No Justin. I don’t want to go. And besides, I have no one to go with.” At least, no one I can go to a school dance with.

“You can go with us.”

“Go with you and Bryce. And Bryce’s boys?” I quirked my brow, sharply.

“Yeah. We don’t bite. We are fun.”

“Fun. Sure.” I muttered.

“You could see Clay try to talk to Hannah.”

“Or I could sit at home and binge watch Pretty Little Liars.”

“I thought you said you had homework Addy.”

“You know that was just so Jeff would let my excuse slide. For now, at least.”

“Come on. It’ll be fun.”

“If I say I’ll think about it, will you drop it?”

“Yes.” He nodded.

“Then I will think about it.” He made a fist pumping motion and I burst out laughing. “You are such a freaking dork.”

We stopped at Target and looked around the clothes-he wasn’t going to let me look at anything else-for a while. But nothing really felt like me when I looked at it or tried it on. American Eagle was a little better. I was able to at least find things I liked on the hanger and on me. “This?” I asked Justin when I came out of the dressing room in a soft purple shirt.

“It’s nice. Makes your boobs look good.”

“That’s always a plus.” I added it to the small yes pile. A blue one was next. He shook his head.

“Not your colour.”

“Didn’t think so.” A couple more noes were added to the pile before we checked out. Aritzia and Zara were close by, but I didn’t like anything on the rack enough to try it on. We made a quick stop at Madewell and I got a couple of plain white t-shirts.

“Can we make a Sephora stop? I need to replace my foundation.”

“We can if you give me your wallet, so you don’t spend all of your money.”

“I won’t spend it all. I literally only need a new bottle of foundation.”

“Alright. You have ten minutes to get in line tops.”

“Yes Dad.” I shook my head. Justin scoffed jovially. He followed close behind me in the store to make sure I stayed true to my word. They were out of my shade in my usual formula. I grabbed a bottle of my backup formula instead. By the time we were done, I didn’t even have the energy to make a stop at the bookstore. We decided to grab a slice of pizza to go instead of sitting in the food court.

Back in town, we stopped at Baker Drugs and got my mom’s prescription. I grabbed a box of gobstoppers for good measure and grinned at Justin. “Are you spending the night? We can do movies before bed as long as you aren’t a pain in my ass in the morning.”

“Sure. I’ll let my mom know.”

At home, I texted Monty while Justin was in the bathroom. Hey, Justin is spending the night for movie night.

Okay. How was shopping?

Good. I got some stuff.

Awesome. Enjoy your movies babe. Justin came back before I could reply. “Who you texting?”

“Just Zach about our Government assignment. Do we want snacks?”

“Of course, we want snacks.” Together, the two of us went downstairs and raided the cabinets.

“Hi Justin. Hi Addison.” Mum greeted as she came in the door.

“Hi Margot.” Justin replied.

“Hi Mum.”

“Make sure you don’t eat too much candy you two.” She chuckled when she saw us trying to stuff a box of Swedish berries in Justin’s sweater.

“We won’t Mum.”

“Yes Mom.”

I put a bag of popcorn in the microwave. Justin and I ran upstairs with our contraband. We both changed into comfy clothes and arranged our candy on my bed. When the microwave beeped, I ran back down to get it. Mum pretended not to notice me grabbing an extra chocolate bar. I heard her laughing with dad about it though.

“They really are quite cute together.”

“I suppose. Thankfully we don’t need to worry about them being another kind of cute.” Dad said. No, you really don’t.

Justin had Netflix pulled up when I got back to my room and shut the door. He was scrolling aimlessly. “I put butter on in the middle and the top.”

“Wonderful.” He grinned. “What mood are we in?”

“Superbad?”

“Addison! That is an R rated movie.” He exclaimed, scandalously.

“But it’s funny.”

“Superbad it is.” We got settled and hit play. After it was done, we scrolled through and picked The Social Network. Finally, just for fun to end the night… er, morning, we decided to watch the 2011 Footloose. Between the three films, we ate so much candy we knew we would wake up with stomach aches on Tuesday.

[hudush]

time after time

song: time after time by the wind + the wave

book: open heart

pairing: bryce lahela x mc (kimberly wadsworth)

word count ~ 1 140

a/n: “short drabble”  🤡 this is my first time writing something like that in english which isn’t my first language so i’m really sorry for any misspellings and grammar errors! please point them out so i can edit this trainwreck eye--. also, the next one will have some angst in it?? ofc it is if i write it  🤡

❝ stop moving, i’m almost done ❞ prompt from this post

          The sharp hospital fluorescent lights most certainly did not help Kim’s dull headache. A chilly air blast from the AC swept under Her scrubs and made her shiver, despite the white coat thrown over her shoulders.

           She always got cold fast and not moving for a while just made it worse. Sighing, she rubbed her arms and got back to counting drops falling from her banana bag.

           The truth was – she knew she shouldn’t have agreed to cover her colleague’s shift, already being exhausted and not having eaten for the whole day (Ethan Ramsey was a rather demanding boss and even thought he told her to take a break, Kim wanted to stay with her patient), but she needed extra money, now more than ever.

           She winced. Just thinking about her brother’s debt made her feel both angry and downcasted at the same time. She could send him some extra cash but if he got back into gambling–

           ‘Stop moving, I’m almost done.’

           Kim looked up, concentrating on Bryce’s focused face – the furrowed brows and a Little crease between them, faded freckles dusted over his nose and cheeks, strands of hair falling into his eyes. Can he even see anything?

           ‘I still think,’ she started, ‘it would be better if someone from plastics would look at it.’

           Bryce smirked, glancing at her for a second.

           ‘Who is the surgeon here, me or you?’ She could hear the humor in his voice. ‘Besides, maybe I’ll get into plastics?’

           Kim narrowed her eyes at him, remembering how he complained about being on plastics rotation last week – while Bryce was excited for any surgery he could assist, both of them knew he lived on adrenaline, the rush of blood when a new car crush victim was admitted, making decisions in a split of second. The excitement and thrill of someone’s life depending on your sharpness.

           He would also rewatch the most intense episodes of Grey’s Anatomy during their monthly marathon.

           Everyone knew Bryce Lahela would choose trauma. It was just a matter of when.

           He caught her staring and flashed her a smile that made her blush.

           It wasn’t like her to be intimidated, especially not by Bryce. But after the ethics hearing, after the party, after the night spent with Bryce, something changed between them. During his break, Bryce would seek her out even more. Staying at each others apartments after long and tiresome shifts just to spend more time together, cuddled under the sheets. It’s just easier, they would tell their roommates. Kim’s apartament was closer to the hospital, and Bryce drove a car. She would come up with excuses, noticing Jackie shooting her knowing glances, seeing Bryce coming out of their bathroom in the mornings. He would just smile when his roommates would ask about Kim’s coat hanged on a hook in the hall of their apartment.

           But despite the warm tones of their voices, the quiet whispers in the dead of the night which made them slowly discover each other piece by piece, despite the light teasing touches making her heart flutter and the ones that made them pant, wanting more and more, despite everything – they didn’t talk about it.

           She knew that the pace of their lives, sometimes not seeing each other for days just to steal a few moments in the on-call room, not being able to plan something just because there’s incoming trauma from a car crash, someone had to stay with the patient, or they simply didn’t have time for one another–

           Maybe he didn’t need more. Didn’t want more. Maybe that’s all they were – friends who stole hushed secrets and passionate touches leaving them both lighthearted and content in each other’s embrace.

           And maybe, just maybe, Kim once thought that they may be something more.

           But she stayed silent, taking what he was willing to give.

           She squirmed, sitting on a hospital cot, moving her legs back and forth, her shoes squeaking on the floor. There was no point in thinking about it, at least not when Bryce was just inches from her, stitching a cut on her forehead.

           Just an hour ago she found out how dangerous are hospital beds if you just got off from your 48 hours shift, heavy-eyed and most certainly dehydrated.

           After getting her almost killed by the bed, Sienna wouldn’t stop apologizing and Kim was pretty sure her roommate, when she saw the cut, would look for the head of plastics if Bryce didn’t show up and reassured her he would be more than happy to help.

           ‘I need to practice anyway’, were his exact words at which Kim started to protest.

           ‘There you are’, said Bryce, finishing stitching her up. She felt his touch lingering on her face for a second just to disappear like it was nothing in another. ‘Good God, I’m so good at this, you won’t even have a scar.’

           Kim rolled her eyes and hopped of the cot, inspecting the cut in the mirror. He really did a good job but just because of the smug smile on his face, she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction, admitting it.

           After putting a small bandage on the cut, she turned to Bryce, suddenly nervous, not knowing what to say. He glanced at her from putting away the instruments.

           Aware of his stare, Kim shifted from foot to foot, feeling her cheeks going red. She coughed, clearing her throat and wiped her cold hands on her blue scrubs.

           The scalpel jockey would not make her anxious, and especially the way he looked at her right now, as he was thinking about the way they clung to each other two nights ago, how their bodies would fit together–

           ‘Thanks for…’, said Kim sheepishly, pointing at her forehead.

           Bryce just smiled and nodded. ‘Are you free tomorrow night?’

           She stopped with her hand on the door handle, looping back at him, going over the Schedule in her head.

           ‘Why?’ He could hear suspicion in her voice that made him chuckle.

           ‘It’s Nico’s birthday. We’re going out to Donahue’s for some drinks.’

           ‘So now you’re hanging out with the vagina squad?’ Kim raised her brows thinking about Nico, an obstetrics and gynecology resident she worked with on a few cases.

           Bryce sighed, slouching his arms. ‘I already hang out with IM residents, I have lost my dignity a long time ago.’

           Narrowing her eyes at Bryce, Kim raised her middle finger, receiving a wide, playful grin from him.

           ‘I’m changing my Netflix password. You can pay for your own’, she turned away, hiding her smile.

           ‘So?’, he asked stopping her from walking out.

           Kim hesitated for a second. Tomorrow was one of the rare nights, when she would be free. But she promised her brother…

           She sighed, shaking her head at herself. He’s not a child anymore.

           ‘I’ll try to be there.’

[crazy-loca-blog]

Personal thoughts on… 2019 releases (Part II)

Note: As the title says, these are just personal opinions on Choices books and chapters. Of course, you may agree or disagree with them, I only use this platform to express my thoughts on what I read every week.

Welcome to the second part of this three-part post. As I said in the first post, I will include current releases and books that were released on 2018 but finished in 2019. The list is organized in alphabetical order and it doesn’t include the VIP Books (as I don’t have access to the feature) or the seasonal books (as I’ll talk about them in another post, after all of them have been fully released). You may see Part I here.

PS: I’ll do my best to upload Part III today (Dec. 31), but I can’t make any promises because I won’t be home on New Year’s eve.

Desire & Decorum, Book 3 (August 4, 2019 - December 1, 2019): This is the only wedding book that made real sense to me this year… and it’s definitely my favorite wedding book of the year. It was the perfect closure for a series that didn’t convince me that much at first, but that I learned to love over time. We had this whole new plot with Harry that was a little weak, but at the same time it was a smart move, as it helped to keep a balance and to not overcharge things with the wedding. But can we just talk about the final chapter? It was simply adorable, I loved every part of it (honestly, I haven’t heard of anyone complaining on the final chapter yet). If I have to criticize something, I’d say the writers went too far with Mr. Sinclaire. The man went through hell in the first two books, I thought they would give him a break in the third one… I was so wrong! But overall, I really liked this book, the new characters such as Harry, Briar’s mom and Hamid’s mom gave some fresh air to the story and new plots such as matchmaking Luke and Anabelle’s sister were a nice twist. I’m pretty happy with this book.  

High School Story: Class Act, Book 1 (October 8, 2018 - January 14, 2019): New cast, same school. I couldn’t actually say if I like or dislike this book more than the previous series because I actually feel it’s just impossible to compare them. The writers had a very difficult work to do, as they needed to make this cast different from the HSS one within the same environment, and I’d say they succeeded. Not only you can see the problems are different, but also the way they address their relationships is different, and it’s quite evident that they are younger kids that are transitioning into their teenage years more than teens thinking about graduating and going to college. We also went from this super popular MC and being prom king/queen to a MC who embarrasses himself/herself quite often and whose friends (except for Rory) are probably amongst the most unpopular kids in school. Finally, the fact that the story focuses in one specific school area (the theatre club) was a pretty smart move to not make this story a mess. So overall, it’s not one of my favorite books, but I enjoyed reading it and I appreciate the writers’ effort to make this series different from the first one.

High School Story: Class Act, Book 2 (February 11, 2019 - May 20, 2019): This is the theatre book where theatre is not seen anywhere. I’m not sure if this is the weakest book in the series (I think I still need to realize how Book 3 will end in a few weeks), but I admit I had to review the chapters’ summary because I couldn’t even remember what the book was about. The plot was simply lame, there are no big highlights in the story, we spent like half of it in the middle of a fight between Rory and our twin because they both want to be school president (can we talk about the fact that Maria is graduating?) and we appeared on TV. Our MC simply didn’t shine or did anything truly remarkable during this book. If it weren’t for Ajay’s parents’ divorce and the role our MC played on supporting his/her friend, this book would have been easily forgotten.  

High School Story: Class Act, Book 3 (October 30, 2019 - Present): Honestly, I’m not a fan of mixing both HSS gangs in Book 3. It feels weird not to be able to control a MC that I was able to manage in the past. I also understand all the hype for going to London, but did we really need as many people as we see in this book? Where are people like Natalie or Danielle? I mean, I don’t like them, but they’ve belonged to this group since day 1. Anyway… I’m guessing this is the way the writers found for us to say goodbye to this series. After six books, I think it’s the perfect time to put High School Story to rest for a while, before it becomes a mess. Even though there are some chapters left, I can already tell what my favorite thing about this book (and this series) is: the issues these kids have to face in their personal lives are serious stuff. In the past, Rory’s mom had cancer and Ajay’s parents got divorced, and now we talk about Skye coming from an abusive family and our twins trying to find their roots. That was enough. I don’t think we needed Rory and Ajay facing new problems in this book. Instead, I would have preferred to see Rory working with Maria or Ajay dealing with the fact that he became “the man of the house” after his parents’ divorce. The idea was to see them “growing” throughout the series; unfortunately, this hasn’t happened yet.

It Lives Beneath (October 10, 2018 - January 30, 2019): This is the only book in the list I haven’t read… and there is a very specific reason for it. When It Lives In The Woods was first released, I noticed that a lot of the screenshots people were posting included spiders… a lot of them. As an aracnophobic myself, I just couldn’t even begin the first chapter of that book. Then, It Lives Beneath was released and I noticed that there were some characters from the first book, so I said “mmm… maybe I do need to read the first book because it might be linked to the second one”, so I never read it. However, I have to agree with the fandom on the fact that we need more mystery and horror books in the app. Sure, I’m a sucker for romance books, but at the same time, I’m totally capable to understand that we need more diversity in terms of books. So I’m totally waiting for this series to be revisited in the future, the fans deserve it.  

Mother Of The Year (August 30, 2019 - Present): This God-tier book is one of those gifts that you don’t expect to be that nice, but it ends up being a treasure. It definitely climbed up in my personal list and went straight to the Top 2 of my favorite books in the app. Nobody had much hope on this story, but we ended up meeting an adorable daughter, a mom that was a warrior, three LIs that were simply adorable, one of the best BBFs that Choices has given us and Luz Mendez, probably one of the best characters in the app. Overall, the plot and the characters (even the evil ones!) were so real and relatable that I have to admit I went through every single possible feeling while reading the book… I laughed, I cried, I screamed, and I got mad at times. And of course, my heart broke when we realized that this was a standalone book. But do I really want it to become a series? I’m not that sure. There is a part of me who wouldn’t like to see a second book because the ending was so precious that I wouldn’t like it to be ruined with a second book. On the other hand, I love the story so much that it makes me sad to realize we won’t be getting anything new from these beautiful people. However, I think the story is perfect to make a Christmas or a Halloween special, focused on the kids… maybe even a summer book! This book definitely deserves to be revisited in the future.  

Nightbound (April 24, 2019 - July 31, 2019): I’m not surprised by the end of Nightbound, but I’m definitely sad. I had problems trying to understand the book at first because I’m not the type of person who’s into supernatural and magical stuff (I have to admit this also causes me some problems even when trying to understand the plots in books such as Bloodbound and The Elementalists, despite I think those are good series). I may even have to replay it to fully understand it. But there are some things that are pretty clear to me: the book is well written, the book is good, the book has awesome characters and most importantly, the book is DIFFERENT, something that this fandom has been asking for a long time now. So I was quite shocked when the writers said the book wasn’t doing as good as they thought. Does this book deserve a sequel? Absolutely! Even though I think it got a proper closure, I also think the plot has a lot of potential that could be explored. As that won’t be happening, I really hope to see some of these characters in Bloodblound 3, just as we saw Cal in Bloodbound 2.  

Open Heart (February 22, 2019 - June 7, 2019): Sorry, but right now I think my opinion will be completely biased because this is my absolute favorite book in the app. There’s just nothing I don’t love about it. The balance between the romance and the professional stories is one of the bests (if not the best) in the app, the characters are well written, the medical plot is interesting and it addresses many of the current conflicts in health care… it’s just a masterpiece. On the romantic side, it doesn’t matter if you go straight to Bryce or Jackie or if you preferred the slow burn with Rafael (actually, can he be considered a “slow burn”?) or Ethan, the writers took their time for the MC to befriend them, we got to deeply know these people (except for Bryce and Jackie… I’m so waiting to know more about them!) before making a choice, and not all of the romance stories ended up with happy endings and fairy tails, so yeah… it’s my perfect book. Can’t wait for the second one!

Passport to Romance (March 20, 2019 - June 19, 2019): Probably my biggest disappointment of the year. The idea behind this story seemed nice, we could have learned about so many places, we could have laughed about so many of the troubles that people travelling on a budget face, we could have had a series instead of a standalone book. Instead, we got a MC who was always late, who seemed to be quite irresponsible with her job, who lived a life of luxury and who suddenly became BFF with people he/she had just met. Come on, they were nice people (even though at some point I just wanted to make Elliot disappear), but again… we had just met, it’s not like you can’t live without them. On top of that, I can’t even remember how many times this gang violated some rules… sure, Yvette was happy, but it might have cost you an expulsion from Europe, which is not nice if you’re a travel blogger. Let’s add up the non-sense of some situations. I know that books are supposed to be a mix between fiction and reality, but I think they went too far this time. I mean… why would the coach allow Ahmed to travel with a group of strangers instead of travelling with the rest of the team? Especially if he’s a professional athlete and he’s competing in an important championship... sorry guys, but there’s nothing I can rescue from this book.

Platinum (May 30, 2019 - September 19, 2019): This is definitely one of my favorite stories this year, and sorry… but I will never get over the fact that this is a standalone book. This book is so unique in so many ways… for the first time, we heard voices and we heard people singing… we also got Avery and Raleigh, two LIs that were gender customizable… the secondary characters were gold… the plot was so cliché but so attractive at the same time… and I could continue. Reading it every week was a real pleasure, you were actually waiting to find out what would happen the next week, and at some point, it seemed like it was the only book that people talked about. However, creating this book was expensive, and well... that just sucks. It would have been so nice to see our MC touring with her friends, taking new risks, visiting new places, and receiving the rock star treatment that she deserved. This book still has a solid fanbase (especially in Tumblr), so it’s just sad it won’t be revisited in the future.

[hainethehero]

could you write a monty x winston smut imagine? where he alive, winston gets justice and clears monty's name. then they reunite when he gets let out, they admit their feelings and have sex xoxo

I took so long to write this but I wanted it to be perfect 😢 it turned out to be more angst than smut but, idk I just love the dynamic between these two.

(I'd like to also point out that though Monty didn't kill Bryce, there is no justice to be had when it comes to his rape charges. He still has to spend time behind bars for what he did to Tyler, so keep that in mind.)

Five years.

It's been five, long years since Montgomery de la Cruz had seen a full day of the outside world.

He can almost remember the day they'd incarcerated him, shackled him like the criminal he was, and had thrown him behind solid iron bars. His father had spat on him like a piece of garbage on the roadside. Called him a faggot and had left him to rot in the Crestmont California Correctional facility. He was eighteen then, so they tried him as an adult. He'd gotten the maximum; seven years behind bars with the possibility of parole.

But, by some miracle, his sentence had gotten reduced due to a cover-up by Deputy Standall and Clay's group which had revealed Alex as the person who'd actually killed Bryce Walker. Well, Alex had sort of just pushed Bryce from the bridge and let him drown while Jessica watched. She had been marked down as an accomplice.

<em>It was fucked up.</em>

But Monty took it with a grain of salt.

He knew what he'd done to Tyler was wrong. And he accepted his doomed fate with a new mindset. There was no way he could ever forgive himself for what he'd done. No way Tyler would ever be the same after that and he had to accept the cold fact: he was sick. And he deserved his punishment. The only thing left to do, was change. Bryce had it right the second time around when he started mending his ways. Didn't make him a hero or whatever, but changing was better than remaining the same evil, unfeeling monster he'd been.

His world had changed immensely since he got tossed behind bars. He suffered nightmares, mostly about Tyler and that day in the school's washroom. Other times, he'd dream about his father beating him to death after finding out about him and Winston.

And Winston...

Oh, that boy was the truth and solace Monty had never known. He was the kindness, when Monty faced nothing but fierce beatings from the other prisoners. And he was the warmth when Monty grew cold at night, curled up under his threadbare sheets. He'd visit Monty whenever he could, which was often. And he'd bring all sorts of pictures of the college he'd been accepted into. He'd talk about life outside the walls, and make promises that Monty was sure he probably couldn't keep.

Promises like, "We'll go to Paris one day." and "I can't wait for you to come home. I can give you a tour of the whole campus."

Monty was sure he'd stay behind bars forever, but, he smiled and nodded anyway, giving in just to make Winston happy.

Because Winston made him happy.

His father never visited him after the first day. Every time he called the house, the man would either be too busy or too drunk to hold a conversation. But Monty still called, hoping that the man had a change of heart. Hoping that he'd get the chance to speak to his mother again.

But no.

No such mercy.

He expected that much from his fucked up family anyway.

He'd been a bastard ever since the day he was born. That wasn't about to change now.

"Hey," a soft voice interrupts, banishing his dark thoughts and pulling him back to the present.

He's standing just outside a city apartment, in New York. The place is very alive around him, despite the darkened moonlit sky above. There are people bustling about, dressed cozily in boots, stockings and trench coats. The weather has been growing colder as the holidays gained on them. But Monty finds that he doesn't particularly care about the fact.

He's just happy to see the world again.

"C'mon, it's freezing out here." Winston murmurs, keys in hand.

"Here," Monty chuckles softly, wrapping his own jacket around Winston's shoulders before taking the keys himself.

They practically pour into the apartment, locking the door behind them as the cold wind follows them in.

"Ugh, I hate this weather." The boy complains, kicking off his shoes.

Monty snorts and shrugs innocently. "I've kinda missed it. Don't worry though, I'm sure I'll be sick of it by the next week."

Winston smiles at him and bites his lip, suddenly all blushy and shy.

"I've really missed you. Having you around, seeing your face everyday... being able to hold your hand... it's been so hard." He murmurs softly, their noses brushing together.

Monty considers him briefly before pulling him into his arms.

"Same here." He replies honestly, his chest constricting with the pain of realization that it's only been three days since he was last behind bars. Surreal wasn't even close to explaining this experience but he took each emotion in stride, a bit nervous to show Winston the changed man he had become.

"The first night I spent in that cell, I got beat up. Real bad, by some of the guys who'd been in there longest. They called it initiation, like some kind of hazing. I ended up with like... four cracked ribs and a broken jaw I think. But all I could think about was you."

Winston pauses and glances up at him with teary eyes, arms wrapped tight around his waist.

"Me?" He says with a soft smile.

Monty nods earnestly. "Yeah, you. I thought about that night... when we... y'know. And I thought about how you'd let me... let me just fuck you right there on your bed... And then spend the rest of the night with you. I'd thought for sure that you would've wanted me gone. But the next morning, you were in the kitchen making me toast or some shit."

They both snort at that, soft laughter filling the cozy apartment. Monty cups Winston's jaw and pulls him in close for a gentle kiss.

"I thought you'd be hungry." The Hillcrest boy defends cutely.

Monty's grin only grows wider and he kisses him again.

"Thinking of you got me through that first night. And then you came to see me the next day. Totally made it all worth it."

Winston blinks away a few tears and kisses Monty back, deep and intimate.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you either. Wanted you from the moment I saw you at that party. Still want you."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Things get hot and heavy from there, lips locking and tongues tasting the other's until they're suddenly breathing as one. They make it up to the bedroom with much distraction and difficulty, nearly tripping on the stairs and tumbling but Winston holds Monty close before any of that happens.

Within the dark confines of the room, Winston immediately gets to work, going down on his knees to undo the zipper on Monty's jeans. They both chuckle a little at the memory of when they'd first met and Monty runs his fingers through Winston's dark, wavy hair. It's not rough, like before, or firm; it's just a gentle hand through his hair to soothe him. And it works. Winston winks cheekily at him before swallowing him down.

"Oh fuck!" Monty hisses, his eyes closing slowly, head thrown back as he thrusts slightly. Winston's mouth is just as tight and wet as it had been the first time. He takes Monty's length down til it prods the back of his throat, riling up his gag reflex but he doesn't let up. He keeps sucking like a champ, trying to bring Monty to the edge.

"F- fuck yess-" The boy moans out loud, his toes curling into the carpeted floor. He slips off his shirt as Winston pulls back a little, kicking off his jeans.

"Wanna ride you." Winston murmurs, getting up from his knees to kiss Monty deep and hard. He takes a moment to admire the body prison had gifted Monty with. It's well-muscled and defined by hard lines and smooth curves. The veins are raised in his arms and his torso is ridged but not overly so. He looks beautiful.

Even in all of his abashed glory.

"Take my clothes off." Winston orders quietly, his eyes following the nervous ticking of the boy's jaw. He looks a little scared, Winston notices, and he imagines it has something to do with the time he'd spent in the correctional facility.

"I-" Monty begins but his voice becomes all choked up and he lowers his head sadly. Winston frowns and runs his fingers through the boy's short hair, soothing him.

"Hey, it's okay. Look at me. Monty, look at me."

Monty meets his eyes reluctantly and all he sees are tears, glistening in those hazel brown orbs... and shame. He presses a soft kiss to Monty's forehead and pets his hair gently.

"I'm sorry..." The boy sobs, resting his head on Winston's shoulder. The raven haired boy holds him instead, arms coming to wrap around his neck, hand on the back of his head.

"Shh, it's okay. You're alright now. You're here, with me. I'm right here with you." He whispers into Monty's ear, placing tiny kisses on his jaw and his temple.

"You're here... And I'm here." Monty repeats, nodding hard as if he had to make sure he believed his own words.

"We're okay..."

Winston nods, holding the boy's face in his hands. "Yes, we're okay. You can let it go now. You did your time. And now you're home. And I'm really, really happy you're here."

It takes a while but when Monty finally cracks a genuine smile, Winston feels all of the boy's anxiety and shame go away, like waters receding from a shore. It's lethargic and deep and he doesn't take it for granted as they go in for another kiss. This time, he feels Monty let go of the morbid thoughts in his mind and grins as the boy begins to dominate the kiss.

"Mmh."

"God you taste so good." Monty whispers, burying his face in Winston's neck, desperate to mark the boy, to show him just how much he'd missed him. Winston moans out loud at the sensation of teeth scraping gently over his Adam's apple. He growls deep in his throat and strips off his own clothes.

"Fuck me. Please- I want you to fuck me."

Monty observes him silently as he gets naked and then proceeds to crawl backwards onto the bed. He follows the boy, a cute grin on his face as his brown eyes trace the smooth length of Winston's body. He hovers over him, arms pressed on either side of the boy's head, like he's about to do a push-up. He lowers himself down, biceps flexing and kisses Winston on his forehead instead.

"Hey," he grins, his chuckle coming out in choked, staccato breaths.

Winston's eyes crinkle at the corners when he smiles up at Monty. "Hey." He says softly, gasping a little at Monty's hand brushing his bare hips. It felt like euphoria, feeling Cruz's hands on him again. He told the boy that much and then did his best to ignore the tears glistening in those beautiful hazel eyes.

"Hm- ...you ready?"

Winston bites his lip and gives Monty his best, 'I'm ready' grin. He spreads his legs and then hooks his ankles around the brunette's waist, causing him to thrust his hips down. The friction is overwhelming and they both have to pause before one of them blows.

"F-f fucking hell babe-" Monty shudders, hissing as Winston bucks up into his thrusts. Their naked skin rubbing together increases the heat of arousal. Winston whimpers at the term of endearment that had slipped past Monty's lips, turned on in a way he hasn't been in a long time.

"Oh, like that don't you?" Monty smirks, spitting into his palm and jerking the boy's cock in tandem with his thrusts.

Winston whimpers again, his body going taut when he feels the boy's hands stroking him sensually. Molten arousal lights up his stomach and he can feel himself peak.

"W- wait! Stop- Jesus- I can't-" He sobs, accidentally pushing the boy off him. Monty immediately freezes and pulls back, looking embarrassed and panicked.

"I'm sorry I-" He starts but Winston brings him back with a gentle kiss on the forehead.

"Its okay. I promise, I just... I didn't want to cum before you even got inside me."

Monty's eyes light up in understanding and his cheeky grin returns.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." Winston nods with a smile, wrapping his legs around the boy's waist again, pulling him in close. Their naked bodies touch and rub and slide against each other, smooth skin and firm muscle. It's beautiful and undeniably hot, the way Winston is rutting against Monty like some kind of bitch in heat.

"You're so fuckin beautiful." Monty whispers, before hiding his face in Winston's neck. He lines up his cock with the boy's hole, the head prodding at that slick heat. Winston moans at the touch and arches his back, panting when Monty begins to push in.

"Mhm! Oh shit- baby-" He hisses breathlessly as the burning sensation intensifies between his legs.

"So fuckin tight!" Monty grunts, pulling back a little to give his raven-haired lover some time. He kisses the boy's brow, then his cheek, the tip of his nose, and then those soft lips. It's a much needed distraction for Winston who finally relaxes into the kiss, opening his eyes and whimpering as Monty pushes in another inch.

"Please... please, please..." He begs breathlessly, hands in Monty's hair, tugging at the short strands firmly.

"Fuckin missed this." Monty sighs, thrusting experimentally, Winston's tiny moans and whimpers urging him on.

It gradually becomes rougher- just the way Winston likes it, and he finds himself falling even further for the messed up boy with a record. His parents would absolutely kill him if they knew he was fucking a guy who'd went to prison. But they didn't matter.

Not after five long years of waiting for Montgomery de la Cruz.

Nothing else mattered but him.

With that thought in his head, he rises up and manoeuvres himself out from under Monty.

"Wha-" Monty starts but he fixes him with his own hands so that he's lying on his back and issues a deep, dirty kiss down the guy's throat.

"I wanna ride you."

Monty's impressed grin says it all, so Winston reaches behind himself, and slides that thick length back inside of him. The tip brushes past some spot deep inside of him and his thighs shake a little.

"Mhm... yes- fuck-"

"Oh ssh- shit-baby..." Monty chokes, his hips thrusting involuntarily.

Winston grinds down on his cock to meet his thrusts, thighs sliding deliciously against his hipbones. He tightens up on each upward drag, causing Monty to hiss as pleasure and arousal sparks like exposed wires inside him. His grip on Winston's hips is tight, almost bruising and he's sure there'll be fingerprints marring the boy's pale skin tomorrow.

But he doesn't care.

Some carnal part of him wants to mark the boy. Wants to make him his again. He'd had him once, all those years ago... And now that he'd done his time, and was free, he wanted to have him again... and again and again.

He told him as much.

And that's when Winston pauses, rolling his hips slow and deep, intertwining their fingers together, staring unabashedly into his eyes.

"I want you too... never- ...I never wanna lose this... lose you, again." He whispers, tightening his fingers over Monty's.

Hazel eyes start to glisten but they never stop staring back at him. Monty's brow furrows cutely as he smiles despite his tears. And Winston can't quite put his finger on it but Monty's smile reminds him of sunlight after a rainstorm, breaking out from behind grey clouds. It's like he's the same person Winston's always known... but better.

"C'mere." Monty whispers, not waiting as he reaches out to pull the boy down over him. Their lips touch, soft and timid at first, before it grows into something far more meaningful and deep. Their breaths mingle and a string of saliva stretches between their tongues as they break apart. Winston pulls the sheets over them and continues to ride slowly until they reach the edge together.

"Fuck I'm gonna-"

"Cum in me. Please, cum in me, please..." Winston sobs, his hole tightening as he cums seconds after Monty blows his load.

Only the sounds of their harsh breaths and grunts fill the room for some time. Monty's low-timbred "Oh fucks" are accented by Winston's softer, more airy, "yes, please, please, please." They don't stop grinding against each other until all of their pent up arousal and emotions eventually drain away, leaving them both exhausted but completely satisfied. Monty lies there, eyes wide open, panting tiredly while Winston curls up on top of him, head on his chest. They're sweaty and warm but it doesn't feel unbearable.

It's a good, blissful kind of warmth that keeps them both tucked under the blankets, with soft smiles on their faces.

At least, Monty was smiling.

He frowns slightly when a soft sob escapes Winston's throat and the boy burrows deeper into his neck to hide.

"Hey," He murmurs softly, rubbing Winston's shoulder gently. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." The raven-haired boy whimpers, shaking his head. "Nothing, it's fine. I'm fine."

Monty observes him silently, stroking his wavy locks, brushing some strands out of his eyes. "No, you're not."

Winston deflects again and instead kisses him. He accepts the distraction for a while, letting the boy slide their tongues together, their lips pressed in a tight fit. But then he feels the tears drop onto his own cheeks and he pulls back.

"Please. Tell me what's wrong. Talk to me- if it was something I did-"

Winston immediately shakes his head. "No, it- it's not you, I-" His voice chokes off on another sob and he scrapes his nails against Monty's chest.

"Win-"

"I thought you'd never come back, okay?" He finally says through gritted teeth.

Monty freezes, mouth hanging open slightly.

Winston rolls his eyes and shakes his head, looking away while he's still lying on Monty, legs spread on either side of the boy's waist, cum dripping down his thighs.

"I thought- mmh... I thought they'd sentence you to life in prison or something. Clay and his stupid friends framed you for murder I- ...I couldn't let them do that to you."

"Hey, I know. It's okay now. I'm here." Monty reassures the boy gently, running his fingers through that soft, dark hair. "Look at me... Winston, look at me."

When the boy finally looks up into his eyes, he freezes, shocked by the raw emotion displayed there. He's never had anyone look at him like that before. Usually his Dad would look at him with disdain, like a roach on the floor that needed squishing. Or his mother would barely even look at him, and when she did, her eyes would be filled with a terrible disappointment. His friends weren't an exception either. They barely valued his friendship and he barely offered any in the first place.

But Winston...

Winston was the unexpected exception.

He didn't just look at Monty, no. He gazed at him, with eyes full of wonder and endearment. Like he hung the moon and lived among the stars. Lile some kind of precious thing that needed saving... needed love and needed protecting.

He wasn't used to that kind of love. That kind of emotion.

But he holds the boy's face in his hands and brings him in close, tears in both their eyes.

"Hey-" He whispers gently.

"I think I love you."

[walkerismychoice]

Stripped Bare - Chapter 7 (Bryce X MC AU)

Book: Open Heart

Pairing: Bryce X MC (Charlie Hawkins)

Summary: Charlie faces the aftermath of her overconsumption, and she and Brycee attend the first daily physical activity with the group.

Rating: PG-13 

Word Count: 2025

Thump. Thump. Thump. Charlie opens her eyes to unfamiliar surroundings but quickly orients herself. She wonders if that noise means the pounding pain in her head is actually loud enough to hear, but then it happens again, and Bryce calls out from the other side of the door.

"Charlie, are you awake? We have less than an hour before we need to leave, so I thought you might want some time to get ready."

"I am now! Thank you." Charlie glances at her phone and sees the time is 9:07am. "Shit!" She curses under breath. Apparently she was too indisposed last night to set an alarm.

"Okay, good. I brought you some breakfast if you want it...and coffee." Bryce adds.

"I'll be out in a minute." Charlie stumbles groggily into the bathroom, checking herself out in the mirror, and she is a hot mess. She splashes some cold water on her face, and wipes off her smudged mascara with a washcloth. He hair is looking quite medusa-esque, so she tames it as best she can and throws it back in a messy bun.

Her eyes drift down her body for the first time, and snippets of her memories from last night come trickling back. She remembers Bryce handing her the pajamas but she doesn't know how she got them on. She rewinds further and cringes hard. If she remembers correctly, she freely stripped down to her underwear without caring that Bryce was right there. This was after he had to carry her because she was so drunk she couldn't walk straight. And before that she grabbed his ass. "Oh god," she groans. Good thing she's paying Bryce because she doesn't know why he'd want to put up with her otherwise.

Although Bryce has seen much more of her already, Charlie is feeling much more modest in the sober light of day. She throws on her bathrobe and heads out to face Bryce. She sheepishly steps through the door, and Bryce looks up at her with a smile.

"Good morning. Looks like you slept well."

Charlie self-consciously tucks an unruly curl behind her ear. "Yeah...I passed out pretty hard. I'm sorry. I was probably so obnoxious."

"Nah. I kinda like seeing that uninhibited side of you. You've been so..." He pauses like hes searching for just the right word.

"Uptight?" Charlie chuckles and Bryce follows.

"I was going to say something more like stressed out, but hopefully you can relax more now. We made it here and Katelyn was definitely impressed by me and my charming self.

"Yeah, I noticed." Charlie huffs and rolls her eyes.

Bryce smirks. "Are you jealous?"

"What? No...It's just very distasteful for her to be blatantly flirting with you in front of her soon-to-be husband."

"Mmm-hmm. Sure."

"Anyway," Charlie starts, desperate to change the subject, "how did you sleep last night?"

"I hate to complain about a place as nice as this, but that sleeper sofa is pretty terrible. I feel like an eighty year old man this morning." Bryce massages the back of his neck.

"I'm sorry. Maybe we can switch tonight," Charlie offers.

"Don't worry about it. I'll survive, but you won't if you don't get some sustenance in you. Here, eat before it gets cold." Bryce hands her a wrapped breakfast sandwich and a cup of coffee, along with a packet of ibuprofen. "Caffeine, greasy, carb-rich food, and NSAIDs should have you feeling human again in no time."

In her zombie-like state, it barely registers that he uses the technical term for the pain meds. He's into sports and physical activity she reasons that he's probably had some injuries before and knows because of that. Maybe he's trying show her that he can pull off pretending to be a doctor. Whatever the case, she's just focused on getting herself to a functioning state.

Charlie takes a sip of the coffee, and it tastes just right. "Mmm. How did you guess how I like my coffee?"

"I took a wild guess based on what I know of you. Classic, sophisticated, and just sweet enough. Two sugars and no cream, right?"

Charlie laughs. "You are spot on with the coffee, but after last night, I'm surprised you still think that about me. You really are the best Bryce. I'm not sure I'm paying you enough."

Bryce's smile falters momentarily. "You've got to stop selling yourself short, Charlie. You are great, and this doesn't feel like work at all, even if I have keep you from falling on your face every once in awhile."

"Oh, god, don't remind me." Charlie buries her face in her hands. "I'm never drinking again... Well maybe not never, but what happened last night is not happening again on this trip."

Bryce chuckles. "If you say so. Are you ready to get your tennis game on?"

"Ugh, no." Katelyn had scheduled some type of physical activity every morning, like she'd never heard of sleeping in. "I hope you know how to play, because I'm going to be dead weight."

"I've never officially played, but I know the basics. Something tells me you know all the rules though."

"And why is that?" Charlie questions.

"Tennis is a rich person sport. I figured you all played."

Charlie narrows her eyes, offended by his assumption, but in her case he's not wrong. "You know that's just a stereotype... but in my case yes I did play tennis. I started when I was six and played all the way through high school. I went to state twice."

Bryce cracks a smile. "I actually knew that. I checked you out on the internet, remember? But I'm sorry for being kind of an asshole about it. I had a lot of preconceived ideas about you that have proven far from true already. You'd think I'd know better when people often do the same to me."

He's right because she'd made some of the same types of assumptions about him, so she's in no position to judge. "It's fine Bryce. As you may have noticed with Katelyn, those stereotypes sometimes hold true."

"She's definitely something," Bryce notes and they both laugh.

Charlie finishes her sandwich and drains her coffee. "Oh! I almost forgot." She runs into her bedroom and grabs a folded outfit for Bryce. "I have the mandatory uniform Katelyn made us order. Each team has coordinating outfits."

Bryce holds up his bright pink polo and white shorts. "Not my usual style, but you know I can rock any outfit."

Charlie bites her bottom lip to hold back a smile. "Of course you would say that. I actually think she assigned us pink because I used to hate it when we were kids, but the joke is on her, because I love it now."

"That's the attitude I like to see. Now go get ready so we don't get another tardy added to the list."

Charlie starts to walk away, but another thought pops into her mind. “So... I remember you getting these pajamas for me, but I don’t remember putting them on.”

“That’s because I sort of had to put them on for you,” Bryce admits. “You were pretty far gone by that point.”

Charlie winces and groans internally. “Like I said, I’m never getting that drunk again.”

~~~

It’s only ten in the morning, but the sun is already burning bright, heat radiating off the court surface. Charlie’s not in top form by any means, but after Bryce’s hangover cure combo and roughly a gallon of water, she’s not feeling half bad. Landry’s brother Vance and his pregnant wife Stephanie had bowed out of this event, leaving  and even eight couples. Poor Kyra, being the only single bridesmaid, is paired up with Bob. Charlie almost feels guilty, since that would have been her, but then she looks over at Bryce and has no regrets. As awkward and embarrassing as she has made things at times, she’s already having a much better time on this trip with him than she would have without him.

Katelyn announces the pairings, and predictably, she and Bryce are paired with Landry and Katelyn. Katelyn too went to state for tennis at her respective high school, only once, but she won, whereas Charlie never did, and Katelyn will never let her forget it. But Katelyn went for doubles and everyone knows she was the weaker partner, so at least Charlie has that to hang onto. Charlie really wants to beat her today, but she’s not sure she has it in her. Here’s hoping Bryce is as good at tennis as he is at everything else.

“You guys ready to lose?” Katelyn asks cockily as she takes her place, ready to serve the first ball. 

Charlie should be paying attention, but with Bryce in front of her towards the net in ready position, angled forward at the hip and knees bent, it’s difficult not to stare at his ass in those short white shorts. From what she remembers, it feels as good as it looks, and she should really not be objectifying him like this, but it’s just right there in front of her face. Before she realizes what’s happening, a ball whizzes past her face and lands in the back corner of the court.

“Yes!” Katelyn runs over to Landry and holds out her hand for him to high five her. “Better pay attention next time, Charlotte.”

“Oh, Katy, that was one serve. You might want to reserve your smacktalk for if you can actually win.” Charlie is fired up now and she is not going to go down without a fight. 

Katelyn serves the next ball over which Charlie backhands with a wicked spin over the net. It drops right between Landry and Katelyn and then bounces out.

 Bryce looks back with a smirk. “Nice one, Babe.”

The next ball goes back and forth a few times before Bryce smashes it and it hits the court and bounces out before the other pair can ever figure out where it landed. The points go back and forth a few times, with Charlie and Bryce winning the first game and Katelyn and Landry winning the second.

Then it’s Bryce’s turn to serve. Despite his lack of formal instruction, he knows exactly what to do. He serves up ace after ace, he and Charlie winning the game without giving up a point, Katelyn and Landry bickering and becoming more frustrated with each other by the minute.

They break for water, everyone grabbing towels because they are all drenched in sweat. Bryce lifts his polo over his head. “My shirt is soaked.”

“Any excuse to take your clothes off, huh, Lahela?” Charlie teases.

Bryce shrugs. “I work hard for this body. No sense keeping it covered up. You can take your shirt off too if you want.”

“Haha, very funny, but I’m good.” 

Charlie looks over to the other side of the court to see both Katelyn and Landry gawking at Bryce, and she smiles smugly. Landry suddenly decides he needs to take his shirt off too, and Katelyn rolls her eyes. His scrawny, pale frame stands in stark contrast to Bryce’s tan, muscular build. Charlie’s really not that shallow when it comes to looks, but the fact that she can see defeat written on Katelyn’s face in regards to this unspoken competition leaves Charlie deeply satisfied.

Landry and Katelyn continue to fall apart as the match goes on, and before long, Charlie is serving the match point. It bounces right at Katelyn’s feet, and hits her in the chin before rolling out of play.

“You did it!” Bryce exclaims, running over to Charlie, picking her up, and spinning her around. Swept up in the moment, Charlie takes Bryce’s face in her hands and gives him a peck on his soft, full lips. His eyes go wide as he sets her down but then a big grin spreads across his face.

Oh my god. That just happened, Charlie panics internally. “Sorry, I-” 

“Hey, don’t be sorry. That’s part of the agreement right?” Bryce quietly reassures her. “We have to kiss every once in awhile...for show of course.”

“Right...for show.” 

[finderskeepersff]

72. Part 3

Sofia doesn’t really wish to speak, she ate her food in the bedroom and said she can take care of Cartier on her own, she doesn’t need any help at all. I think it is hurting her more than she is letting on “Jackie, you should have seen him” Marcel pointed across the table “he grabbed Erwin, one hand and then the next hand, bang. He is down for the count, it was nice to see. I think the move was great but it makes me think. Why did you not hit my son’s? They are not the most strongest boys so I am shocked you didn’t hit them back after seeing that punch” I laughed “erm, it was more of a thing of I didn’t want to upset Sofia. I didn’t want to cause drama, she has been so excited to come here so I backed away and ran off, but I was angry. I didn’t want the trouble, I did already upset Sofia prior. I am going through things and Sofia is there for me, I guess we need each other. But I need to suck it up with my own issues and just be there for Sofia, she needs me” placing my fork down “if you upset Sofia, I will have to use my Machete on you” sitting back in the seat “I wouldn’t, not in that way. Look, I been through a lot in my life. I dealt with things the wrong way, I was set on the wrong path, I was lost but I met Sofia. I regret how I treated Celine, she didn’t deserve it but I was lost and I didn’t love her like that, I am trying to change and be better. I am having my own daughter so it scares me that the things I done will curse my kids, you know. I don’t want that for them Marcel, but with Sofia. She is my everything and what she says goes, and that is it” I don’t want to give too much away “I heard that Celine and your family have had your fair share of trouble, Bryce. Oh that child, he is a so cute. The thing that gets me, he finds it hard to tell you the issue so he tells you a whole thing before he tells you he just wants an Apple, I worry for my grandchildren and this was it. I just hope she is ok” I think Sofia just needs time, they need to give her time.

I can’t really sleep so I am just watching some news channel, also I am waiting for Ethan to call me. He is supposed to update me on things but he hasn’t called me or anything, not yet anyways. Kyle was shocked to know I just left, he is glad I did. My phone finally rang “took your time” I answered “sorry, I had to check on the club. How is Barbados? I see you are on the beach and shit while we suffer here” rubbing my face “it’s not like that, trust me. I rather be there, how is things. Did Mia move back in? You dealt with it?” I need to know she good before she starts complaining about it “yeah, it’s dealt with but like I am still fixing their shit, making sure it’s perfect. Also we got a meeting in Atlanta, Raphael wants it so I said Atlanta, make it easier for you. When are you back? We need you back” that is a good question “erm, Ethan. I am not sure, can’t you deal without me? You can, everything is set, I did all the shit you need?” I don’t get it “niggas play up all of the time, Miami. You need to deal with that with Amira. Cassius, nobody listens to me, it’s you they listen too. They scared of you out here, you know that. You out there just makes people free to do shit, I don’t know. Anyways, so is that it. No more Celine?” Looking down at my hand “I don’t want to lose my girl out of this, if I ever try to say do something in regards to her, ignore me. Just leave her, fuck that bitch. She ain’t my problem anymore. You remember when we went Harlem, that time burned that house down?” I asked “I do, why?” I wish that guy was alive, I want to kill Leyton’ dad but he dead “I want you to find out if they have family and peers, let me know” I want more suffering for every tear Sofia is dropping.

I want to do more damage to that nigga, I am so damn angry again. But also horny, I don’t know why. Let me try and go to bed, I need to sleep this off I am so fucking horny and it was so random. I was just speaking on doing dumb shit and now I want my dick sucked, I am going crazy as fuck and I need to sleep this shit off. Getting up from the couch, grabbing the remote from the table and turning the TV off. This shit is so wild to me that I am horny, it has been a while since I have had sex but this whole scenario shouldn’t be making me horny, this is really bad of me. Jogging down to the bedroom, it’s dark as shit and kind of creepy here. Pushing the door open “oh shit!” I spat closing the door, Sofia is awake and scared me “woah” I opened the door again “I am sorry but I got scared, I didn’t expect you to be awake” Sofia is sat on the edge of the bed, she is not bothered at all. Dragging my eyes down a little, I can see a little nipple from here, nodding my head because I can confirm that is indeed some nipple and it’s well appreciated right now “are you coming in or nah?” Sofia said “yeah, I am” stepping into the room and closing the door “you ok bub?” I don’t like to see her so down, I know Sofia and I know something like that will affect her “just don’t feel safe, I am just thinking about what happened” sitting next to Sofia on the bed “I am here baby” placing my hand on her leg “but you wasn’t, I woke up and you wasn’t here. How can she know that her daughter got raped Cassius?” placing my arm around Sofia “I am sorry, I am here now” I should have stayed close by.

Sofia needs to cry it out and like Henry says to me, only I can fight my demons myself but the people I love will me to help me help myself which worked “I love you so much Sofia, nothing will ever change that” pressing a kiss to the top of her head “I will be fine Cassius” Sofia sniffled, thinking back to what Marcel said maybe I am being selfish by not giving her my last name but it’s not to do with that, it’s me “I should have known, I made you come here for what?” shaking my head “no, you bought me here and showed me Barbados, I met Marcel. He is the coolest nigga I know, I like him. I met Jackie, she cool, I met Hope. See I remember these people Sofia, and these are the people that will be at our wedding” Sofia didn’t say anything, it’s like she has given up on me and I am not sure how to feel on that “I just want to sleep, can you please lay with me. Just keep me safe” nodding my head “I got you, I am coming to bed anyways. I didn’t know, I am sorry ok” moving my arm back, I was just thinking she was asleep when she wasn’t.

I feel bad, but the relief on that. My dick needed it, I feel better “thank you Sofia” locking my phone, I am not a cheater. I masturbated to my wife looking sexy as fuck, I ain’t want to see nobody else’s body besides her. I am set now, I had a my morning release and now I can get on with my day. Throwing the balled up tissue in the toilet and flushing it “oh shit, my bad” cant leave my babies on the side, taking some tissue off and wiping the floor clean. Imagine that, I hated it though. I had to be slightly quiet with the way I did it, throwing the tissue in the toilet and flushed it again “man” I said to myself “how many times you going to do that?” I jumped at Marcel’ voice “erm, coming out” let me wash my hands quick time, there is no real place to hide here at all. I hope he didn’t hear any of that performance, it was good for me but still. Pulling open the door “you got stomach problems?” He said, I chuckled “erm, nah. Just reading, had my phone with me” Marcel shook his head “and Daron is here, he won’t say anything to you” oh great, her uncle is back.

Making my way to the living and kitchen area “I will make you some food” Sofia got up from her seat, she didn’t need too “thank you” Daron looked at me “can I speak to you?” I don’t really want too “is it to punch me again or what?” I asked “no, just please” he gestured to go out the back “ok, I will be back” I said to Sofia, walking behind her uncle. I think this time I will swing for him, I ain’t about to have his shit at all, not again. I guess I can have my morning cigarette, grabbing my packet out “you smoke a lot” he pointed at me “I know, stressed” placing the cigarette between my lips “I heard, my dad told me. It hurts me with what happened, I didn’t know and I just wanted to say sorry and where is this guy now?” lighting my cigarette, placing my lighter in my pocket. Moving my cigarette back “dead” I said as I blew the smoke out “dead?” he repeated, it just hit me. I am speaking to this man like I know him and he knows what I do when he don’t “what I mean is that, he died” let me correct myself “do you know how?” shaking my head “I am in shock, I didn’t say anything to Sofia. My dad said not too but he said you have been a great help and you helped him with Grace, I judged you” I shrugged “we all do I guess, I just want Sofia happy” that is my main thing on my list of things.

Sofia went with Jackie to get a few things for the home, she has taken Cartier so I am with Marcel, I mean I like him so I don’t mind “how has she been? She seems ok” Marcel asked “erm, ok. She didn’t sleep until I did, she wanted me close. I think we don’t need to bring it up, it’s best if we let Sofia move on. She did and she thought Grace moved on too but clearly not” shaking my head, that bitch is not shit at all “did you think about what I said? About Sofia not being a Bundy anymore, I would like you to do that for her. Move on, I would like to see that” licking my top lip, that is a lot “we are getting married” I said “soon” I added “what if that soon was too late Cassius, anything can happen. You love that woman so you take her, you take her and you love her. I want to give her away, please” this is crazy “what is wrong?” Marcel asked “because I just don’t think I am worthy of her Marcel, you don’t know me. You don’t know my real life! If I die then I leave Sofia a widow, least she is free” he don’t get it “I think my grand daughter would rather know she is yours than being Bundy still” and it hit me, Sofia has said them words to me before. Looking away from Marcel, she has said that to me and I promised her “you know her so well?” I mumbled “I know what I see Cassius, you love her. You love her so much but you get very uptight with the word marriage, think of it like this. It only changes her last name, the rest is the same” he sighed out “I just want to give her away Cassius, she has no father nor does she have a mother but I want to be the one to give her away to you, I want to do that” I feel like it’s put on me “I know her father, he wasn’t a great guy” he dead too “you seem to know the bad Cassius” Marcel said “I did notice, and maybe I am being nosey but you have a lot of tattoos. You have a lot of scars on your body” looking over at Marcel “bullet and stab wounds, I know them markings. I got them myself” licking my lips nodding my head “I nearly died, I have cheated death” Marcel squinted his eyes at me “you’re not an accountant are you?” I shrugged “I count money” I said laughing “oh god, look let’s just change the subject, I got respect for you and I don’t want to say about anything” I can’t tell him what I am.

Marcel is a character, he just keeps on smiling at me “I stabbed a man before” I knew he was going to say something “killed him?” I asked wanting to know if he killed a man “no, he is alive. He dated Jackie” I snorted laughing “no way! Seriously?” I spat, he nodded his head “we all got a past but I am just curious that you have so many scars, even on your legs” I blew out air “does it look that bad? Cause Sofia sees this?” Marcel pointed at me “if Jackie finds out you are both not married and sleeping in the same bed she will not be happy, I didn’t say a word to her about it but it’s just noticeable” that means it looks bad “I got beat up so bad, I got stabbed, and shot at and then they beat me so much, kept on kicking me and kicking me. This is the time I just met Sofia, I was in hospital. Got taken out before the police got to me, and the first place I went too was to see Sofia at her work, she was devastated but I didn’t want Sofia to think I didn’t want to know her but it was because I got beat. I thought I was dead, that was the last thing I remember. Then I got shot in my leg, I got stabbed when I was locked up, but here I am” he wanted to know, clearing my throat “you right Mr Bundy, Sofia said to me she wanted to take my last name that time we had a disagreement, I promised her. So Sofia has always wanted to change her last name, I have not really fulfilled it and I think I should but I left the words I was going to say to Sofia at home, I wrote them” Marcel smiled at me “you don’t need no book Cassius” he placed his hand over his chest just over he heart “you have it here” he is not wrong “I think it will be nice to see you give her away, I knew Sofia wanted her dad to do it when she knew him but he wasn’t good at all. She gets let down so many times, its time” I said.