#anyway may you all find the catharsis of destroying some glass in a stupid way

[utilitycaster]

real talk when I was in college and in the Hating Everything stage of coming out of a depressive episode one of my friends was like "hey you wanna throw burnt out lightbulbs and perhaps an empty wine bottle off the roof" and it did in fact help a lot so I trust Chetney implicitly

[astaroth1357]

Catharsis (A Satan x GN MC Fanfic)

As it would turn out, moving is hell, and tensions are high in my house for the moment... I can't work up enough of a playful mood to look at my other WIPs right now, so here's another episode of "I'm Moody and Need to Work Through Some Stuff... w/ Jazzy." Funny enough, I wrote this while listening to Kartharsis (yes with a K) by TK from Ling tosite sigure (yes the Unravel guy).

Warning: Angst, Verbal Abuse

Catharsis: the process of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions

Satan could never claim to have the healthiest anger management strategies… To some extent, it's not exactly his fault. He's a being born from rage itself and for most of his life, it's tinted his every thought… Even after cooling down some, his temper remained exceedingly short. And worst of all, his wrath could burn looong… If given a chance, he could stay mad for days unless given some kind of release…

His brothers usually knew to steer clear if getting Satan that pissed. The only surefire way they had of calming him down was to let him destroy something and that wasn't doing all that great for the House's walls… But brothers do what brothers do. There will probably always be a day where they're bickering or fighting with each other… which means that Satan could never be off the hook entirely...

The person who actually got his nerves this time was Belphie. The co-members of the Formerly Anti-Lucifer League don't butt heads very often, but it's bound to happen occasionally… Particularly when Lucifer was concerned. Belphie had promised to get Satan a book he needed for a curse the two of them had been scheming for months. It was supposed to be so intricate and difficult to undo that it'd have the eldest struggling for weeks… Unfortunately, Belphegor had decided to sleep in on the day he was supposed to bring it... This made Satan miss a crucial time window to put the finishing touch on their curse. They'd have to wait another century for the planets to align again…

To say that Satan was irritated would only be the start… truthfully, he was furious. Days of effort and planning went to waste because his lazy brother couldn't be bothered to get out of bed! Perhaps even more unfortunate, though, was that Belphie wasn't one to take someone else's anger lying down… He may be lazy, but he had wit far beyond his rank and venom to match it in equal measure... All fights between these two were like verbal pit matches, a vicious dance of jabs and insults until one of them finally throws a punch or someone else steps in to break it up... 

Today's unlucky contestant was Beel, who hollered at them loud enough to shake the walls... Satan knew that Belphie was more than happy to leave the situation as it was… The lazy bastard could always hide in the attic and sleep away his problems… but it wasn't that easy for Satan. His anger doesn't just "go away" like everyone else’s... Sure, he may appear to simmer down.. but it lingers. It festers. And he hates it…

He hates being mad… There's nothing pleasant about anger. Breaking people under your feet in righteous fury? Well, there's some fun in that. But just being angry with nothing to do about it...? Whoever asks for that…?

Which is why he was trying to indulge a suggestion the MC gave him some time back to take his mind off it… Stress cleaning. Apparently, it wasn't unheard of for humans to use cleaning to vent emotional frustration through physical activity... The concept didn't sound unreasonable to him at the time. So when he passed by the kitchen and saw the dishes from Beel's last meal stacked up high, he decided to roll up his sleeves and give it a try.

… He should have known that a little bit of cleaning wouldn't have been enough for him, though. With each dish that he scrubbed clean, his sponge's pressure against the porcelain increased ever so slightly… Building and building until he was very nearly cracking the plates beneath his fingers… 

No… the rage wasn't leaving him. He kept replaying the fight again and again in his mind… always producing new comebacks to words that were never said and spiraling farther down into his own resentment… Hadn't the human said this would work? Why wasn't it helping…?? If anything, he just felt more worked up than before! Why was he listening to them anyway? What would they know about helping him, Wrath made flash, control his anger?? What kind of idiot was he for even considering-!

"Satan…? Are you okay…?" The tentative, yet familiar, sound of said human's voice called to him from the kitchen entrance. He didn't bother turning back to face them and just kept his eyes trained on the filth in front of him...

"No." There wasn't any point in lying, was there? They could see him practically slamming the plates down on the drying rack by this point…

"Ah…" He heard them shift their weight as an awkward beat passed. They no doubt knew it wasn't a good idea to approach Satan when he was angry… but that meddlesome streak of theirs must have been begging for them to intervene in some way. Typical human… sticking their nose in places it didn't belong…

"Well… Beel told me about what happened… You and Belphegor, right…?" He heard their footsteps finally enter the room and stop somewhere close to the kitchen island. Trying to keep some space between him and them, perhaps? Oddly reasonable coming from such a reckless creature… But it didn't stop his shoulders from tensing up at the meer sound of Belphie's name.

"Don't bring him up." His words snapped out like the crack of a whip, menacing and sharp. Though he couldn't see them, he was sure the MC flinched, and he felt a perverse sort of satisfaction in that thought… There was a pause before the MC continued, clearly considering their next words carefully...

"Satan… I just wanted to tell you that it's my fault Belphie slept in… I kept him up last night, and you know how he gets when he can't sleep." Their words were slow and careful like they were trying not to startle a wild animal. He still didn't turn back as he waited for them to continue.

"... Okay. I just thought I'd let you know, I guess… It wasn't really his fault…" There it was. His simmering temper had been wanting, no begging, for him to find something, anything, to let it go on... And this was just what he had been looking for… an opening.

"Oh. So you're taking his side then?" Pausing, he stopped abusing the glass in his hand and let an eerie calm build from his lack of motion... He knew just what he needed to do to scare them. He's done it to other people hundreds of times...

"W-what? No-I never said that…!" It didn't matter that they were right. He wasn't in the mood to be reasonable right now.

"You may as well have. You're already down here coming to his defense, aren't you? Did he put you up to it? Holding that precious 'cuddle time' you two like so much hostage, I bet..." He threw them a sidelong glare from over his shoulder and felt yet another wave of satisfaction from seeing their confused face. It was like he just swept a rug out from under them, and they were failing to catch their balance.

"That's not what I…!" They stopped themselves mid-sentence as it seemed to dawn on them just what they had gotten themselves into… Satan wasn't looking for a reasonable conversation right now. He was looking for a punching bag... But they weren't looking to be one.

"You know what… No. I don't appreciate your tone." He could see their eyes narrow as they found their resolve once more, stronger this time. He hissed softly at the loss of his easy mark...

"What does it matter? You're the one who started this in the first place. You just said as much a bit ago. Don't you know to leave me alone when I'm pissed off anyway, or are you really just this stupid?" That one must have hurt because he saw them flinch this time…

"I'm only here because I knew you were upset-"

He cut them off sharply. "And you didn't think I needed the space?" Again, they flinched at the growing volume of his voice, but they didn't appear to back down either. They only responded in a tone much softer than his own, patient but strained from invisible wounds...

"It passed my mind… But I just wanted to help…"

Help? Oh… Right. He must have forgotten who he was speaking to… Help was all the MC ever did. Even when they had no idea how or when their ideas were so crazy, they'd put Mammon to shame… He always knew they meant well… Did his anger really just blind him to why he was even washing dishes in the first place…?

The two stared at each other for a few moments while Satan battled over what to say next... Their earnest answer had re-awoken a bit of sense in him, yet he could tell his temper still wasn't satisfied… An overwhelming part of him, one he loathed to acknowledge, was calling for more vitriol… It just wanted to fight and be petty for satisfaction's sake… to have an enemy to stomp over, no matter who it was…

But just looking into the MC's eyes was keeping those hateful words down his throat… He could see that they were hurt and worse, he was well aware that he caused it… Sure, he may not have raised his fist, but he had still done plenty of damage with his voice alone… They didn't deserve his rage, and even now, he hated to have released it on them in the first place…

His internal struggle must have reached a peak without his knowledge because he hadn't noticed his grip was tightening around the glass in his hand. At least, not until it suddenly shattered all over him. The MC jumped back with a yelp at the unexpected explosion, and even he shouted a swear or two as he felt the shards lodge into his palm.

"Shit!" It didn't take a doctor to know that having glass embedded in your skin isn't ideal, and he could claim to at least have a little first aid know-how. As he used that knowledge to inspect his hand, he almost completely forgot that the MC was in the room until they made a noise.

"Um… Satan?" They were hesitant to speak, which he didn't blame them for. He did have a habit of breaking things for intimation value, but he guessed that they noticed he was as shocked as they were for once. "Need this?" In their hands was the first aid box the family kept in the kitchen. Though it was really only intended to bandage up the occasional knifed finger... it would do for the moment.

"Yes, that would help… thank you…" Though his appreciation was genuine, his words were stilted and hollow… He couldn't even meet their eyes considering how this whole exchange started… He felt terrible before, but now it was more than enough to finally overpower the wrath within him… He hates knowing when he's been a total asshole too…

He gestured the MC to put the box on the counter then began treating his wounds. They helped him as he worked nimbly, but he could feel an awkward tension between them… Not undue, but still uncomfortable. He knew he had to remedy it quickly...

"MC… I'm sorry… That was wrong of me…" They glanced away from his hand for only a moment before responding with a strained smile.

"It's alright…"

"No. It wasn't…" He paused only to grunt as he removed the largest glass shard from his palm. "...I was looking to let off some steam and targeted you unfairly… I didn't mean what I said; I was only searching for a reason to be mad… None of this was your fault… I hope you can forgive me…"

The MC shook their head as they searched the box for bandages. "No, I have some fault here too… I really should've given you space to cool off before talking to you… I just saw that you were doing the dishes and thought you were simmered down already…" He stopped what he was doing a moment and glanced back at the sink's drying rack, now half full of still soapy and partially cracked dishes.

"... Well, I don't know how vigorously you wash those, but I don't think I'm ever going to find that to be a relaxing activity." Their soft chuckle relieved a bit of the weight in the air, much to his solace.

"Fair enough… Though I'm not sure what I was thinking telling you to try cleaning in the first place. I should have just asked you to break every vacuum in the House instead." They both snickered over the image of him ripping the handles off of their hoovers by accident, and, slowly, Satan could finally feel the anger in his chest fading away... Of course, it'd be the MC to do it… It always was. Why hadn't he found them to start with…?

"And just so you know, I'm not taking sides with Belphie or anything. I'm sure he turned off his alarm or something." He snorted slightly as he finished the bandaging. Were they really still on that?

"I know, don't worry about it. It doesn't matter what side you're on to me anyway." He took his newly bandaged hand back just in time to see their puzzled expression.

"What? Why not…?" He chuckled some as he let his undamaged hand come to rest on top of their head, stroking back any bangs in an affectionate pet of sorts. He then caught the back of their head to tilt it up towards his, meeting their wide eyes with a devilish grin.

"Because you'll always be mine, kitten…"

[joy1579]

Zen cheated on MC. She finds out and instead of crying her eyes out is getting drunk and calling Seven (which is madly in love with her but never told her because of her relationship with Zen).

so first I’m so sorry this took sooooooooo long but i hope you get it and i hope you like it. i had a ton of fun writing drunk MC. also i didn't want MC to use seven as a rebound so they don’t get together right away but seven does take care of her and they probably get together after a couple of months. she has time to move on and their romantic relationship has a real foundation to grow on.

so without further ado

zen cheats and seven gets the girl

You normally didn’t pay any attention to the gossip that circled around Zen constantly. after all every week they claimed there was some new lover or budding cast romance and every week without fail, Zen would come home to you, loyal as a knight. lately though the rumors had become more focused more realistic somehow. Zen’s rehearsals had run later, started earlier, things simply seemed off no matter how much you tried to deny it. so when the news story broke and plastered TV, magazines, and websites with numerous pictures of Zen wrapped around some pretty little blonde with big blue eyes, you hated to admit how much you had braced yourself for the blow.

the RFA chatroom was going haywire and your phone was ringing off the hook as you packed a single small bag. you supposed you should have been crying, grieving the loss of nearly two and a half years of “love” washed away by little more than some passing fancy. yet you couldn’t quite find it in yourself. Instead you felt an icy ball of hard anger settle in the pit of your stomach.

so it was that you now stood in some no name nightclub sipping a drink you couldn’t pronounce bought for you by some guy that had since given up on your affections. You had shut off your phone to stop all the notifications that had been flooding in since the pictures of Zen and THAT woman were released. You didn’t want to deal with the aftermath of that bomb dropping right now, didn’t want to explain things to the RFA or have to see Zen trying to defend himself. Right now all you wanted was to find some sort of catharsis in the loud music, alcohol and dancing. Downing the last of the far too sweet drink, you made your way toward were the band took requests. you shoved a ten towards the man and half shouted over the music.

“something fast, angry, and loud” he nodded and you decided to grab another drink while you waited for your request. you opted for strength over taste and grimaced as you chugged the drink. the icy anger you felt slowly dulled with your 3rd drink of the night and in the back of your mind you knew it was more the effects of alcohol than any real emotional progress. Four more drinks and several songs later had you ready to turn your phone back on if only to find a place to stay. confusion struck you however when your lock screen showed only black with green text moving at lightning speed.

“grrrrl that’s crazy you gotta show me how you got it to do that!” said one of the girls you had found yourself dancing with earlier.

“I didn’t do this girl.” you said slurring your speech only the slightest bit “oh no! what if this isn’t my phone!” you gasped “no nah it’s my case false alarm it’s mine. see the purple that’s, that’s my color so it’s got to be my pho-.” you were cut off by the ringing and answered it quickly fumbling the phone just a bit your drunken haste “phone?”

“mc?!?” cried the voice on the other end

“seven!! lucy, lucy- yell, lu- luceal? how do you, how do you say your name seven? not seven the other name you know the L one the bible name.”

“what? MC? are you drunk? never mind. listen I’m on my way to get you I got your location from your phone already so I’ll be there soon”

“I made friends, seven listen, listen” you pointed your phone towards the group of girls you’d been dancing with “grrl! grrl! you gotta come here my friends on the phone! you know the guy I told you

“fuck that guy!” one of them yelled prompting another to cheer an agreement.

you tried to stifle the laugh that fell from you lips before you replied. “nooooo the other, the other guy the good one remember? oh she’s dancing now.” you held the phone back to your ear to explain “she’s dancing now seven but, she’s so nice and she said, listen she said hyun is” what had she said? the memory was fuzzy now but you did know one thing “hyun is so stupid you know that?”

“MC I’m so sorry about what happened”

“where does he get off pulling that crap?” you broke into a fit of giggles suddenly “wait no I know where he gets off don’t I. Do you think she knows? seven do you think she knew?”

“mc please I’m almost there okay just 3 minutes’ tops can you come outside for me I’ll meet you outside”

“seven I think, I think I need a place to stay cuz, I think I need a place to stay because I lost my key or I gave it away? I don’t know”

“mc come outside please I’m pulling in”

“seven thank you so much oh, oh just a sec” you held the phone to your chest “grrl I gotta go!” you yelled waving at the dancing girls.

one waved back at you quickly before another shouted “you do you girl! YOU do YOU!”

you laugh at that and yell back “Imma do ME” before stumbling towards the door. just as you reached for the handles though the world lurched to one side and you stumbled directly into someone’s chest.

“mc? are you okay? you don’t look good! come on let’s get you out of here.” it took you several long moments before you recognized the car and voice of the man you had run into.

“sev! your here!” seven flinched at your loud voice before raising an eyebrow at you

“MC how drunk are you? like on a scale of 1 to 10”

you looked at your fingers for a moment as if you were trying to count but when your eyes focused back on sevens face your only answer was simply “which one is drunk?”

“okay. That answers that”

“I hate him you know?”

“huh? oh yeah”

“and I, I think he, sev? seven how long do you think?” you asked pulling your knees up to your chest and leaving your heels on the car’s floorboard.

“I don’t know” he admitted solemnly eyes locked on the road and hands in a white knuckle grip on the wheel. the momentary silence in the car was broken by the ringer on your phone playing the telltale love song you had set as Zen’s ringtone. you grimaced and rolled down the window before dropping your phone out of the speeding car.

“what the?!? MC! did you just - “

 “shhhhhh I don’t want to talk about it.” You slurred moving your hand in his vague direction trying to put your fingers to his lips in the classic shushing style but failing miserably.

“I um I’m pretty sure the phones destroyed anyway so I guess that’s that” he mumbled drifting off as you sunk lower in your seat curling in on yourself even more.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been this sleepy seven” you mumble before yawning and hugging yourself tight “Hyun may suck but he was always warm ya know? like, like a god damn space heater”

“if your cold I can turn on the heater” seven suggested gently one hand moving to adjust the air conditioner for you

“nooo” you whine grabbing his hand. you gasped the second your skin met his and exclaimed “your hands so cold”. bringing his hand to your face and pressing his icy finger gently against your eyes you mumble “they’re perfect”. after a moment you sigh enjoying the soothing chill against your skin. you didn’t notice sevens blush as he focused resolutely on the road.

 waking the next morning was hell. the blinking red lights of all the electronics in the room were way to bright and none of them went off at the right times. you buried your head into a dark red pillow before slowly things clicked into place. had your head not ached with every movement you would have sat bolt upright in the bed, but considering the angry throbbing in your skull and slight nausea in your stomach you opted to simply bury yourself farther into the bedding around you. the sheets smelled familiar, a semi sweet honey kissed scent that brought to mind cheeky smiles and mischievous winks. between the signature scent and the deep maroon color you knew exactly who’s bed you’d ended up in. sevens. at some point you would have to address all the implications of that fact but first you figured you should start with hangover management. first things first after all. head still buried in the bedding you used one hand to feel around you and get your bearings. when your finger met with a bedside table you searched it for anything to sooth your headache only to hear a quiet chuckle. you groaned shamefully before deciding to simply flip off the man watching you struggle before pulling you hand back into your make shift blanket sanctuary. After a moment you heard the door open and shut before the sound of a glass being set down on the bedside table told you it was okay to reach out again.

“I shouldn’t drink. I never drink? why did I drink? who let me make such a terrible decision.” you grumble to yourself sipping on the water seven had brought you praying to ease your headache.

“we couldn’t reach you to stop you. you turned your phone off.”

“sorry” you said shamefully “I know you don’t like alcohol picking me up probably wasn’t fun was it”

“don’t worry i was too worried about you to be angry” you buried yourself back in the blankets to shield yourself from light again. he was sat facing the bed with his laptop angled to shine away from you, a gesture you were extremely thankful for even if the light still felt blinding.

“thank you for letting me stay here seven. I guess I’ll have to look for someplace new to stay huh? I don’t really want to continue living with, him” you mused

“I uh, I have a guest room. just till you get back on your feet if you want.”

“you sure you and Saeran wouldn’t mind? I don’t want to impose”

“I’ll ask him but I doubt he’ll mind he practically thinks of you as a sister”

“thanks.” you said letting yourself peek out of the blankets just a little “um where’s my phone?” you didn’t like the mischievous smirk that lit sevens face at that question. Your drunk self-had a lot of explaining to do.

 the following weeks where long. putting your life back together seemed to highlight just how much of it you had built around Zen but seven helped the whole way. you had seven send him the info to take over the fan page that you had managed for him. he even helped you replace your phone and block Zen’s number. you and Saeran spent several evenings listening to angry music before eventually you had raged enough to be sad about everything that had happened and then seven was there to cheer you up. he joked around and sent you cute cat pics, one time he even took you to see Ellie while Jumin was at work. after a while you returned to the RFA chat determined to face whatever drama was awaiting you but seven had already handled it. He had banned Zen that first day and let the other members know what was going on so you didn’t have to relive every detail; and for the first time you thought maybe when one door closes, another one opens.