#anyway i think a solid 8.5/10 for me! i had a lot of fun and in terms of the lore it’s don’t think it’s That bad

[bearenjoyers]

my outfit for if i go into ng+ with this guy.

[potatoesandsunshine]

ok for the benefit of everyone i am putting my ttpd thoughts under the cut bc i had a lot of them. i did listen to the album and i had a fun time writing my opinions as i went! i haven't done any of the extra songs yet but i probably will tomorrow.

overall thoughts: i like this album pretty well! definitely more to my taste than midnights. i'm not instantly in love with it, but i will listen to at least some of the songs a lot and i'll give the whole thing a few more chances to grow on me. kind of a 7/10 for me personally - i'm not sold on songs as vehicles for Lore, i need to think it's a good song to listen to if i'm going to like it. i wanted more differences in tempo or dynamics throughout; at times songs felt a little same-y. anyway, my first impressions song by song!

Fortnight: honestly i just don't love the word fortnight there are too many T's in it. overall 7/10. i like it but i want a tempo change or something.

TTPD: the lyrics... babe. but at least she figured out how to say fuck like a normal person. "Gonna troll you" is also a lot. 5/10 doesn't hugely do it for me, would skip.

MBOBHFT: like this one more. she's doing that thing she does where there are more words crammed into the verse than she needs but the chorus really does it for me. 7.5/10

Down Bad: i like the dreamy vibes. weirdly reminds me of another song? specifically fuck it if i can't have him; my brain is itching. anyway 7/10? WAIT if i can't have you kelly clarkson. (not totally convinced that was it. still can't place it)

So Long, London: wish it had instruments? interesting cadence, reminds me of Lana a little. i wish she didn't use so many modifiers but it's a decent song 7/10

BDILH: y'know i like the message. she's right fuck swifties. we're handshake about this. this one is pretty good! 7.5/10. too long though. has the staying power of like a 4 min song (i think everyone was so extremely weird about this situation and it makes sense that she thinks so too)

FOTS: again i just want less synths. i like the chorus a lot actually. kinda over how she uses American. wait what's happening to this song. solid 7/10

Florida!!!: Florence!!! this one was a guaranteed hit for me. fav so far for sure. 9/10 going on the playlist (the no-skip tswift playlist)

Guilty as Sin?: starting to feel a little samey! not a ton of tempo differences on this album. wild to write a song about wanting this hard. feels kinda honest which is refreshing after midnights. not super my song but i don't hate it. 6.5/10 JESUS COMPARISON??? (this added a point. i feel like people throw out 'unhinged' about her when she's always struck me as an extremely precise planner but this was still a big moment for me. she should do more stuff like this. she should get weirder.)

WAoLOM?: stranger things ass imagery. i like the scream i want more variation in dynamics. pretty good song! i like it as a continuation of anti-hero. 8/10. on the playlist

ICFH(NRIC): we love talking about him and smoke i will be listening to colors. i wish it was faster! but i like it. 8/10

loml: again with the modifiers. nice lyrics in this one imo. kinda sounds like you're losing me. 8/10

ICDIWaBH: very mastermind intro! again w/ the thesaurus problem. thank you. thank you. faster song. 9/10 on the playlist. get a therapist fr girl

TSMWEL: she said you get one fast song. piano!!! honestly i like the way it builds and i like the paranoia. again, feels honest. 7.5/10

The Alchemy: i like it! reminds me of the archer + willow. god she loves a sports metaphor. i will listen to this more. 8.5/10

Clara Bow: kinda feels like an Olivia dig. been very interesting to see the progression of The Lucky One -> here. can't pretend you're not the establishment. 7/10

and just for fun - here it is in the glitter gel pen :P i had fun with this! i'll probably do it for the other tracks too - it was like pretending to be a reaction channel

[thecarelessvoice]

My new hyperfixation is Lee Do Hyun (not surprised bcuz exhuma 😞👌👌🥵)

So it was a given that i'd checked out his other works, and now I'll give each of his dramas that I've seen my personal rating ^^

- 18 again - 7/10 ~ watched this one with my mom, immediately knew it was based on 17 again with zac Efron (god I'm old TT), had great laughs and tons of funs, i knew kim haneul and yoon sang hyun from before, he was super cute and his acting was solid.

- death's game - 10/10 ~ very good plot, his episode was also very good, amazing setting and also seo in guk??? God he broke my heart in this

- the glory - 1000/10 ~ I CANNOT EXPRESS IT WITH MY WORDS HOW MUCH GOOD THIS ONE WAS!!!! I honestly had heard its name but i was busy at the time the hype for it was going on (I'm not a big kdrama watcher) anyways started watching it and IT DID NOT DISAPPOINT!!! like not only he was great in it but the other??? Song hye kyu and lim jiyeon!!! My goddesses!!! They slayed every scene!! Tbh everyone were fantastic in it. Like I see myself to go back and rewatch it.

- melancholia - 4/10 ~ I'm not sure how to put it but this one was just not for me, again he did a good job on it, i liked some of the characters like the professor and si wan, it did get slightly more talorable by episode 8 but... i just didn't really connected to it. I kinda hate student- teacher romantic love and the chemistry between the leads were a bit off and honestly i would've liked it better if they'd decided to ditch the romance plot and make it platonic. (I liked the found family trope)

- the good bad mother - 8.5/10 ~ this mf reaally went all in!!! Like he really did it all for this drama. Loved a lot of scenes, him and the twins were so cute, him and mi-joo? Chef's kiss!! Amazing chemistry ❤️❤️❤️ but i just hated the mother's character and it's cruel of me but i was kinda glad for her ending, also too much heartbreak and frustrating scenes.

-sweet home- watched all the seaons and boy we had another umbrella academy/game of thrones plot fuckery 🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Season 1 - 10000/10 ~ i loved every-single-episode!! Fantastic actings, very very good plot, enjoyable characters, good soundtracks. His character??? One of his bests!!! Which is awesome cuz from what i know season one was from his earlier works. His chemistry between lee si yeong and song kang??? My goddddd

Season 2 - 3/10 despite knowing that he was not in it i watched it anyway cuz i'd ended up immersed with the whole thing not just his character(same with glory ig) and it was... yeah not good at all, i think the problem was the gap between the seasons (probably covid 19 was the factor) but yeah they had all this time to work on it but they just blew it

Season 3 - 5/10 bittersweet and very very rushed ending, so many unanswered questions and honestly i felt empty after i finished it. But he was super hot and again his chemistry with song kang and min si is top tier. (I'm thinking of reading the manhwa to heal my soul cuz I've heard it was way more better and different)

I haven't watched youth of may and i probably won't cuz it was unfortunately heavily spoiled for me so I'll put it away for now, also for some reason i ended up watching a lot of tik tok edits of it XD. (Aaand I'm kind of tired of romance dramas)

[rharyx]

Follow up to this post, where I started cataloging my Final Fantasy journey.

Crisis Core I watched a playthrough back in high school cuz I thought Zack was cool as shit and I loved the theme music, but I never actually played it. But since I finally played 7, I knew I had to follow it up with this, and I went with the Reunion remake since I heard the combat is a lot better. Which I guess it is? I can't compare it to the original since I never played it, but the combat here was real fun and snappy -- I spent hours just doing side missions. And of course the story was as good as I remember it. Only downside is Zack's new actor is nowhere near as good as his original, and that really brings it down a tad. But it still doesn't kick Zack out of my "Top 5 FF characters" list. Also, I always liked Genesis, which I guess a lot of people don't? But I think he's just so funny. Like he actually stops his mission to kill Hojo or whatever to info-dump Loveless lore on everyone in the room. Dude's so weird, I hope he's in the remake trilogy. I think a 8/10 is fair.

Final Fantasy IV Took me a bit to finish this one since stuff got in the way. Not really much to say about this one, though, I guess. The story was good, and some areas and events were cool (like the giant robot thing), with lots of characters who show up and do their thing then leave. Cecil is pretty cool, Kain sure is a guy, and I like Rydia a decent amount. Love how that dude Edge is just straight up called Edge though lmao -- I imagined him having a sort of Johnny Bravo/Might Guy voice, which really elevated his character in my head. But otherwise, the whole game was a pretty standard affair. I kinda thought the vehicle stuff was pretty interesting -- like how you had to use the hoverboat, to get to the ship, to get to the better ship, etc. That was neat in its own way. Fuck the final boss, though, that shit felt unfair. 6/10, I guess? Definitely the mainline FF I've been least into so far, but it's still nowhere a "bad" game.

Final Fantasy XII I heard this was one divisive, but I don't see how? Like, this was really good. I did hear the original release was pretty bad compared to the Zodiac version I was playing, which made me think...... Between 12's initial release, 14's initial release, and 15's initial release...is 16 the first mainline game in over a decade that came out completely fine without needing an overhauled re-release or oodles of DLC to smooth things over in some way?? (I haven't played 13 yet, so that may have been fine upon release.) Anyway, to speak of the game itself, the License Board and Gambit System was really interesting and I kinda hope they bring it back in some way in the future, cuz I love tedious grindy stuff like that where you slowly fill up an ability grid (reminded me of the Sphere Grid, kinda). And the story -- while sometimes feeling really overwhelming with the amount of terms and names I had to memorize -- was well structured and I like how everyone's stories wrapped up by the end. Vaan is truly not a protagonist though, is he? lol. If anything, Ashe was the main character of this story, which I did kinda fuck with, even if she's not one of my favorite characters from the game. Also, I loved how many areas and differing locales we went to on the journey. I wasn't expecting such an array of distinct and visually engaging locations. One thing, though...why did half the voice over audio sound like it was being recorded through a soup can? It was so weirdly mixed. Like, you get used to it, but what happened?? Anyway, as a FF14 fan I though it was neat to see where all the Ivalice inspiration came from, and overall the game was really enjoyable to play. I've definitely not scratched the surface when it comes to the optional content, like Espers or whatever, but idk if I'll ever have the time to complete all that anyway. But for the main game itself, definitely a solid 8/10. Maybe even an 8.5.

Not sure what to do next, maybe try V once it goes on sale. Or probably just jump into Remake and Rebirth.

[keefwho]

July 15 - 2023 Saturday

8:40 AM

I barely remember a dream where I was being complimented by old ladies for being such a nice young man. Thats one of my favorite feelings in the world. 

Last night’s party was AMAZING, solid 8.5/10 which is very good to me. I didn’t expect it to be better than last year’s party. So many people showed up just for me and that felt nice. We basically just hopped wherever I wanted to go which was a few worlds I had in my favorites. Too much fun was had just fucking around. 

Today I’m trying to change my perspective a little bit. I’m okay doing a lot of things by myself as long as I have someone to come back to and share it with. Thats what friends in general are for. I’m someone that wants to share good things with someone always. I’ve always been like this. Sometimes when I’m having too much fun alone, I stop and think who I could include in this. Usually it’s no one so I either stop for some reason or I just try to enjoy it anyways. At this time, I have someone to report all the good things back to so no matter what I do, I want to enjoy it so I can report it back later. 

10:29 AM

I’ve been kinda stunlocked. I keep seeing videos of people out and about and I’m just jealous. I wish I had a normal life sometimes. I hate living where I am. But I don’t want to farm pity about it. I’m doing what I can. Someday my situation will change for the better. 

Its hard for me to focus or do anything when I really want something that I can’t have. I can’t stop thinking about it but I gotta.

2:42 PM

I’m really trying to watch my thinking but I did get on a sort of tangent in the shower that I honestly don’t remember much of at this point. I do think one thing though, I want to focus my attention on one issue at a time because I find myself trying to manage every issue at once and how they relate to one another. Figuring out what to focus on is a matter of pre-requisites. Finding and accepting the kind of love I need for instance would require me to be more in touch with who I am, which seems to be at the core of a lot of things. I can’t truly operate without knowing my own identity. I’ve been thinking the first thing to go hard at is to regain my self perspective. I know what it’s like to “wake up” and remember who I am and my relation to all my memories. I want to get in touch with that and make that more constant. Without that it feels like I’m behaving like a robot or conforming to a character, not acting authentically. 

4:30 PM

Earlier while I was idling in VRchat while working on my world, someone asked me what I like to do in my spare time. It’s one of those questions that instantly re-awakens me to the fact that I don’t know what I like and how constantly scary it is to be in this state of not-knowing. 

I’ve been having this thing where I see more socially active furries posting about their daily life and achievements and they get a bunch of likes/friends supporting them. My twitter is just dead and makes me feel like I don’t matter sometimes because my friends don’t interact with it. Also I perceive these other furries to be part of larger social circles because they actually participate in discourse. I don’t know how to be a part of this though. 

5:49 PM

SMALL exercise that directly applies to my current feelings. 

To begin this exercise, first bring to mind an upsetting thought that takes the form ��I am X’, for example, ‘I am dumb’, ‘I am such a loser’ or ‘I’m so incompetent.’ Preferably pick a thought that often recurs and that usually bothers or upsets you when it does. Now hold that thought in your mind and believe it as much as you can. Focus on it for several seconds. Notice how it affects you.

“My friend doesn’t like me very much.”

It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel like I might have become too attached and am being led on but I’m so desperate for attention that I stay despite believing that they only keep me around so they don’t hurt me or maybe they want something out of me. 

Now take that thought and, in front of it, insert this phrase: ‘I’m having the thought that...’ Now run that thought again, this time with the phrase attached. Think to yourself, ‘I’m having the thought that I am X.’ Notice what happens.

“I’m having the thought that my friend doesn’t like me very much.”

It isn’t very strong but the addition of those words puts distance from the thought. Whereas before it felt true like I was appraising a real thing, recognizing it as a thought rips it from the real world and puts it back into my head. It’s just a way of re-phrasing things to be more “true.” Stating my thoughts straight up is technically lying, or could be since I might not be correct. It’s at least more accurate to announce my thoughts AS thoughts. 

11:50 PM

I HATE TALKING TO MYSELF but I want to learn to tolerate it. I hide from myself because past me was cringe and I worry current me is cringe too, or at least not living up to my own expectations. I fear that I do weird things or behave abnormally in a way where if I got perspective on myself, I’d be very unsettled by it and would realize I have to change a lot. But part of changing anything is appraising it first. Part of that comes from observing my own memories with the realization that the me I am now was also there then. Things happened that I experienced. I made decisions that affected me and those around me. I am a person like everyone else and always was. 

Anyways today I woke up without feeling like total ass so my pre-prepped dinner and staying hydrated last night made sure I avoided a hangover of sorts. I was surprised how okay I felt today actually. Earlier I was unsure of what to do and started to overthink like usual but I buckled down and worked on my world for just a little bit while hanging out in VRC. Unfortunately as usual I did not do much to report, I wasn’t very captivated by much today. I had a pretty good nut while blowing myself. I did a nice little doodle that turned out to have some weird body proportions that I somehow missed while making it but I did go pretty fast. I watched Twitch like usual in my down time while trying to think of something more meaningful to do. This evening I hung out with Daisy in VC while she sculpted a mini version of her fursuit head for reference. I played Mother 3 again finally and got re-oriented into the game. I’m on the road to finishing it finally. 

Maybe I don’t like writing about my day because I barely have anything meaningful to write about. I don’t care about the boring mundane stuff I did. I want to report what I’m proud of and what was eventful. That isn’t much though which is what I’m trying to work on. 

I also wish I didn’t pollute these journal entries with all my rants and stuff. Maybe I could make a second, more public journal that is actually just a recount of my days and what is important to me. 

[starfire-s]

here’s a list of the best, mediocre and worst kdramas i watched in 2020

no one asked for this but it’s happening because i have thoughts (also all opinions are my own if you disagree then get well soon i guess... no i’m kidding make your own posts about it don’t hate me please) ahsjsj anyways click to read a lengthy post and if you actually read the whole thing then thank you i hope you enjoy this wild ride! 

THE BEST KDRAMAS -

mystic pop up bar - this show had everything i ask from a kdrama literally i can name it all found family (to real family), well thought out characters, a mystery plot, special effects, soft romances that were well written, a happy ending! no show in 2020 even comes close to how good this one was! the writers literally guided you throughout the whole thing so you could come up with theories and didn’t do a ‘aha! gotcha’ thing where they want to prove the audience wrong but they wanted us to be right and satisfied! the worst part about the drama is that it’s still so underrated and people just brush it off as some random fantasy show but it’s so much more than that! 1000/10

flower of evil - who doesn’t want to see lee joon gi being the son of a serial killer, living with the name of a man who is in a coma, and hiding his real identity from his wife who is a detective? this show constantly had me at the edge of my seat on a weekly basis so the emotions i went through while watching this are unparalleled! the writers also did such a good job on writing a coherent story that made sense and tied up all the plot points in the end. just a really satisfying show to watch! 10/10

where your eyes linger - i literally bought a $8 viki pass to watch this show so it should tell you everything you need to know about how i feel ahsjsj the episodes were 10 minutes long but we got a good story with well written characters who got character development in a total of 80 minutes it’s insane! honestly it’s still hard to believe this show had rookie actors because they were just so emotive that you could feel all the happiness, sadness, yearning and pining! probably one of my fave kdramas this year because of the acting that i always constantly rewatch! would recommend 10/10

crash landing on you - okay so this drama was actually released on my birthday last year and it was a time in my life when i was going through a lot so maybe it’s the comfort this show provided me through that time this is why i have such a soft spot for it? like the romance was good, it was funny, there was found family, the nk soldiers were all softies, there were strong female leads, soft male leads!!! ahh!! no other show on this list made me think about the unification of south korea and north korea irl because i wanted se ri and jeong hyeok to be together 4ever! but the only issue i had with this show was the ending they gave seung jun if they didn’t do that i’d give this show a 10/10 but just for that they get a 9/10

psycho but it’s okay - this was one of those shows where you’re literally like ‘wow everyone here needs therapy’ but this show was amazing i loved the story telling and how each episode related to children’s book/fairytales! the writers also did a good job with how carefully they talked about mental health in depth without villainising their characters but actually tried to make the audience understand why they were this way which included all the side characters too who had a well thought out story in each episode! also the dynamic between moon young, kang tae and sang tae was everything to me the actors all did an amazing job portraying their characters, it truly was a healing drama. the only thing i didn’t like about this show was the whole plastic surgery plot with the mother like that was very far fetched but it provided drama so i’ll let it slide because the rest was amazing. this show is a solid 8.5/10

18 again - another underrated gem! who would’ve thought a remake of that zac efron movie could be this good!! lee do hyun stole this show for sure the way he portrayed his character and gave heart eyes to his kids (when he’s only 25 irl was the best thing i saw this year ahsjs) i loved the family dynamics in this show, i loved how it talked about what it’s like to be young parents and how society still think it’s taboo to be divorced! it’s a show that makes you laugh and cry at the same time and that’s why everyone should watch it! however, the biggest clown thing this show did to me though was that i got sls for the first time while watching a kdrama... hwang in yeop if u’re reading this i love u and u deserved better 🤡 that aside this show was a 8/10

itaewon class - i actually didn’t watch this drama as it was airing because i thought i wouldn’t enjoy the plot but when i watched it i binged the whole thing in 2 days and my biggest regret is i didn’t watch it sooner! everyone knows i have a soft spot for park seo joon since he’s my favourite actor i’ve literally watched all his dramas like he could star in the trashiest drama out there and i’d still watch it and be like wow (looking at she was pretty 👀) this show aside from the acting had one of the best revenge plots in a kdrama! just watching a character realistically hustle his way to reach the top while fighting the corrupt man whose son killed his father was so so satisfying to watch! however, the love triangle in this show was questionable idk what they were trying to do with that but it personally annoyed me! but still i’ll give this show a 7.5/10 because i enjoyed it a lot!

do you like brahms? - kim min jae and park eun bin.. that’s all you need to know about why this is a good kdrama! i’m usually not a big fan of melodramas and everyone knows i prefer rom coms but this show was just so perfectly melo that i loved all the angst and pain we got!! also just watching two introverted people awkwardly fall in love was amazing! the characters story arcs were also handled pretty well with song ah finally learning to speak up for herself and joon young learning to express how he truly feels! but... the love square? was probably the most annoying thing the rest in my opinion was nicely done! i know people had mixed feelings about the ending but i loved that after all the pain joon young and song ah went through they got a happy ending together! 7/10

find me in your memory - okay this show started off very slow and it was confusing at the start but as it progressed everything in the plot started to fall into place! i mean this show really took opposites attract to a new level where the male lead could remember every single detail from his life but the female lead had to forget some of her traumatic memories to help her cope with her life! they were also tied together through a mutual character who was a big part of their lives in a different way! just an interesting melodrama with interesting characters i liked it! and moon ga young... i love you queen!!! 7/10

THE MEDIOCRE KDRAMAS -

more than friends - was the storytelling in this show groundbreaking? no. was the acting decent? yes. also probably the main reason i stuck with this show until the end! i think we can all agree lee soo had the best character development on this show he started off as a bad boy who wore one ear stud to actually becoming a well liked character... who else did it like him? no one. also the chemistry between the mains was 🔥 but the second male lead was so annoying is there a opposite word for second lead syndrome because i had that for sure! i think the best part about this show was the people i watched it with on here... shoutout to the five of us ahsjsj also this show introduced me to a talented actor/singer like ong seong wu (y’all know my kpop knowledge is nonexistent so no i didn’t know he was in a band called wanna one) all in all a predictable show but i had fun watching it so 6.5/10

tale of the nine tailed - i didn’t actually watch this show i watched it through gifs and instagram posts ahsjsjs so am i qualified to talk about my opinion definitely no... will I talk about it anyways yes lmao. lee rang deserved better that’s all goodbye and take care. 5.5/10

start up - probably one of the most awaited opinions. y’all thought this would be in the worst kdramas section but i decided to give this show some rights. the show started off strong, lost it’s way after episode 6 and then the last episode gave me what i wanted so i have mixed feelings. the writing was not the best i think we can all agree, love triangle as a plot device? wow so groundbreaking 🤡 the characters on the other hand... i loved every single one of them i mean ship wars? i don’t know her. the show had a lot of potential that was wasted but we also got some cute moments between the characters so there was really no winning or losing with this show? but in all honesty you can’t put a talented cast together like this and then just decide to give the audience a mediocre plot but the writers did exactly that! i think i can redirect y’all to my ‘crimes this show committed’ post for a in-depth analysis. lastly nam do san was a GOOD and REFRESHING male lead and ji pyeong was also a GOOD and FUN second male lead!!! this show gave me the ugliest ship war ever that i was transported back to my high school tvd days so thank you for that!! but the cast was loveable and all had a lot of chemistry together so here’s a 5/10 maybe that's too generous but... i think the reason why i didn't enjoy watching this show as much was definitely because of the tag on here lmao

THE WORST KDRAMAS -

the king eternal monarch - i miss clowning this show so much. the amount of braincells i lost while trying to understand this plot... i should be compensated by the writers. however, woo do hwan was a treat to look at on a weekly basis... however the writers kept decreasing his screen time even though he had a dual role... make it make sense? and i cannot comment on the plot of this show because i still don’t understand anything? also in my opinion tae eul and lee gon were the most bland couple of 2020, there was no chemistry between them and there was just a random kiss in episode 5 and they randomly said i love you... where was the development? also lee gon was soooo boring and such a one dimensional male lead! literally all the side characters were so much more interesting and the cast was good... but this plot. 2/10

do do sol sol la la sol - i wanna fight the writer who decided that the plot twist on the show would be that jun is a minor? i had no expectations from this show but it looked cute and nonsensical but that plot twist made me run the other way so fast that i never looked back! just because jun is a boy they really thought this would be excused like lmao we all have critical thinking skills???? the clown behaviour. a solid 1/10

record of youth - i hate this show so much. imagine not utilising park so dam who just starred in the biggest oscar winning movie to her full potential. imagine just making her a love interest to park bo gum’s character in the year 2020. i watched it up until episode 6 and i kept waiting for her character to get development... but it never happened so i dropped this show. also this show featured the MOST useless love triangle i have ever seen in my life like what was the point? also park bo gum’s characters family was straight up annoying (minus the grandpa) but they got so much screen time like that should’ve been given to park so dam... also villainising a gay side character for no reason at all in the year 2020? this show was a waste of my time i want the 6 hours i spent watching this back. -100/10 

backstreet rookie - i watched one episode of this and literally wanted to rip my eyeballs out of my head. idk what ji chang wook was thinking when he signed this drama i think he lost his ability to read because that's the only reasonable explanation for why he chose to star in such a dumpster fire show! this show had a racist character... had a high schooler kiss an adult... sexist jokes... just the worst things you can think of in a drama... this show had it. i still can’t believe so many people watched this show to the point where it had better ratings than pbio... really made me question everyone’s taste? but sorry can’t relate my taste is excellent so here’s the rating this show actually deserves -1000/10

if you made it this far... thank you for reading. let’s continue to love some kdramas together and get clowned by others in 2021! looking forward to it 😅

[divorceegf]

Some choice quotes from Jesy’s interview in Cosmopolitan UK

About her time in Little Mix and making the decision to leave the band

FELICITY: (...) How confident were you, on a scale of one to 10, before you made the band, during the band and also now?

JESY: This is genuinely not an exaggeration – before I got into the band, I would have said on a scale of [one to] 10, I was a nine or 10. I had no insecurities, I never looked at myself and said, “I don’t like that.” When I got in the band, my confidence was zero. Once I got older and I learned not to care as much, I probably got to a 4.5. And then I’d say now I’ve left, I’m a solid 8.5.

FELICITY: That’s a lot.

JESY: It’s the weirdest feeling for me. I feel like I’m going to get upset. [Jesy gets tearful.] I didn’t know that I could be this happy. I thought when I was in the group that it was just normal to feel that way. And because I’d felt like that for 10 years, I just thought, "This is life." Since I’ve left, I feel free. I don’t wake up with anxiety, thinking, "I’ve got to do a music video today, I need to starve myself." Or, "I need to go on an extreme diet so I can look like the other three." That was consuming me.

I constantly compared myself to the others. Of course, a lot of that was in my head, but a lot of it was past trauma. Even recently, I was still getting compared to them. It’s horrible when you already don’t like something about yourself to then have thousands of people point it out. Now I feel like me. When I look back [at my time] in the band, I genuinely wasn’t me. I can’t believe how miserable I was.

.

FELICITY: Why was it important for your mental health to leave the band?

JESY: The last music video we did [Sweet Melody] was the breaking point. We’d been in lockdown, and [that had been] the first time I could have a break and be at home around people that I love. It was the happiest I’d ever felt, and I didn’t realise that until I went back to work. I immediately became a different person. I had anxiety. Whenever we had a music video, I put an enormous amount of pressure on myself to try and lose weight. I have a fear of looking back on the camera. If I don’t like what I see, I find it so hard to be in front of the camera and feel amazing and perform.

I’d been in lockdown, and I’d put on a bit of weight but I didn’t care. And [then] they said, "You’ve got a music video in a couple of weeks," and I just panicked. I went on this extreme diet, with bloody shakes, and tried to eat as little as possible. On the day of the Sweet Melody video I had a panic attack on set because I didn’t look how I wanted to look and I found it so hard to just be happy and enjoy myself. I looked at the other three and they were having the time of their life. I get so jealous, because I want to feel like that and enjoy it, because music is my passion. To have this dream and not be enjoying it because of what I look like, I knew wasn’t normal.

There’s a scene in Sweet Melody I’m not in, because that’s when I had a panic attack and broke down. I was like, "I just want to go home." I was sobbing in the dressing room. Someone really close to me said, "This has got to stop. You can’t keep doing this to yourself. You’re going to end up where you were before." For me, that was the pinnacle point. I was like, "I need to start taking care of myself now, because this isn’t healthy." It wasn’t nice for the other three to be around someone who didn’t want to be there. So I took a break. I went through a really dark time after the music video. My mum said, "This has got to stop now. I have seen you suffer too much. This has been 10 years of your life."

For so long, I worried about others and letting people down. The only person I should have been trying to make happy was myself, and I wasn’t doing that. I needed to do it for my mental health, because I know I would have ended up back where I was five years ago, and that’s scary.

.

JESY: I was on a weird rollercoaster of emotions. I felt sad, because it was 10 years of my life that I was giving up. I felt scared, like, “Shit, what’s going to happen now?” At the same time, I had glimpses of happiness, of, "I can do what I want now.” I don’t feel trapped. If I wanted to go to the fucking shop today and eat 10 bars of Dairy Milk, I could, because I don’t have to worry about being on a diet any more. I don’t have to worry about having a music video or doing an interview wearing an outfit that I don’t want to wear because three other girls want to wear it.

FELICITY: And then you feel like you’re being difficult?

JESY: Yeah. And it’s horrible. I felt like I was coming into an environment, sometimes, where people didn’t want me to be there. Sometimes I wasn’t a positive energy because I was so down. When you feel that way anyway, to be around certain people on my team that didn’t want me there was hard.

About solo music and moving forward

JESY: Music is my life. It’s so powerful for me. I’m in the studio just having fun. I loved the music I made with Little Mix, but it wasn’t the kind of music I listen to. It just feels so nice to be making music that I love. I don’t know when I’m going to bring it out. I feel really content and happy. It’s the weirdest, best feeling in the world.

FELICITY: (...) Can you give me three words that represented you in Little Mix and three that represent you now?

JESY: In Little Mix: honest, hardworking, sad.

FELICITY: And now?

JESY: Honest, content, free.

.

JESY: I feel like there have been a few people who don’t understand why I left Little Mix, but am now in the studio making music. A lot of people said, “I thought you came out of the band to focus on your mental health?” I never said when I put out my statement that I was coming out of the band to never be in the public eye or perform again, or do music. I said I was coming out of the band because I genuinely couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in a girl band.

For people to think that I would just stop working completely is crazy, because [for] me, working on my mental health is going to the studio, and creating music that I love. That’s what clears my head and makes me happy. It’s good for my mental health. I couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in the girl group. It wasn’t that I couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in the spotlight. I was constantly compared to three other girls and that mentally drove me to a really dark place, and I couldn’t put myself through that any more.

I need to do things that make me happy now, and people might think that’s selfish, but sometimes in life you have to put yourself first, you have to love yourself, and do what makes you happy.

[milfspiggy]

Let’s Rank Snifits!

Hello! Snifits are my favorite Mario enemy! To share my love for them, I’m going to go through the entire extended Snifit family, and score them all on a scale from 1 - 10 for your reading pleasure!!

The OG Snifit

Perfect! 10/10!! How could you improve upon such a great design?? Well, you’ll see soon enough, but Snifits are the ultimate being in any form. They’re like Shy Guys, which are already great and wonderful - but Snifit benefits from the addition of a little snoot!!! All creatures could be improved with a snoot, I think. Snifit’s snoot especially looks both boopable and smoochable. I wish I had a Snifit plush. Anyway, let’s move on to some of their friends and get started under the cut!

Spookum

So, weirdly, to start things off, Snifits aren’t called Snifits in Super Mario RPG!! They’re called Spookums! I’m not sure why, but it’s kind of cute, I guess?? This is still pretty much just a Snifit, just with a less cute and evocative name. 9/10.

Snifit, Again

So, I lied!! Sorry!! There actually are enemies called “Snifit” in Super Mario RPG, but they aren’t your standard rank and file Snifits in this game! There are only eight of them, and they’re minibosses!! At least, that’s my understanding from the mario wiki. I haven’t actually gotten that far in Mario RPG yet! I’m bad at video games. Snifits four through seven are actually promoted in-game from Spookums to Snifits if you lose to them in battle, though! That’s a really cool mechanic, and I’d love to see things like that more often in video games. I also like the idea that the colour of the Snifit denotes rank, with black being the strongest. Overall, despite just being a black variant of a normal Snifit, I like these ones just a little bit more than your average Snifit! I just think they’re neat! 10.5/10!!!

Whistle Snifit, Slurp Snifit, and Spike Snifit

Sorry, I lumped these guys all together because they’re kind of just normal Snifits wearing accessories!! They’re all from Paper Mario: Colour Splash. 6/10 for the whole set. I love them all very much but they could stand to be a bit more adventurous!! I like the Spike Snifit the most because they’re wearing a cute little hat and also don’t have something stuffed into their snoot. Why would you put something into an already perfect snoot?? It looks uncomfortable. I like that the one with the straw is called a Slurp Snifit, though!! Slurp is a fun word. Also, these guys all come in red, blue, green, yellow, and pink! Yellow and pink are my favorite colours though, so I used those ones to make up for them being kind of boring :3

Chariot Snifit

Hey, this one is just in a car!! That’s somehow both worse and better than the last few from Colour Splash. It gets half a point though for teaming up with a Chain Chomp, which is another favorite of mine. 8.5/10!!!

Snifaro

Aaaaaaaa!!!!!! Look at these two pals!!! I love them!! The Snifaro is actually just a regular sized Snifit with a cool pharaoh mask standing on top of a regular Snifit inside of a sarcophagus!! The Super Mario Wiki says that one of their attacks features Snifit hopping on top of Snifaro’s sarcophagus and riding it like a surfboard. That’s wonderful and perfect! Take notes, Colour Splash Snifits!! This is how you accessorize!!! 10/10!!

Ice Snifit

Take a look at these two!! They are so adorable and look so warm in their little winter coats!!!! I like the walking head version used in the original Mario+Luigi Superstar Saga a lot, but the more standard looking version in the remakes are impossibly adorable. I would give the original Ice Snifit a 10/10, and the revamped one a 11/10!!! It’s quite possibly my favorite Snifit design.

Ice Snifit, Again

For some reason, this is the only image of these guys on the Mario Wiki, but they’re just as adorable as the previous Ice Snifits!!! Yoshi’s Wooly World is, aesthetically speaking, one of the best Mario games of all time. Possibly the best game ever? It’s too bad that it’s such an easy game. Regardless, this Snifit is on par with the last Ice Snifits, but for whatever reason I like the redesign in Superstar just a liiiiitle bit more. 10.5/10!

Toy Snifit

Absolutely lovely!! I’m not sure if these pals come in different colours, and I’ve never played the Mario vs. Donkey Kong series, but this Snifit makes me want to check them out!!! I’d like a real life wind-up toy of this Snifit. Let’s make it happen, Nintendo!! 9/10!!

Scorchit

Very cute! Kind of plain though. Sorry, Scorchit, but simply spitting out fire won’t put you on the same level as Ice Snifit!! It’s also apparently called “Zeus Guy” in the manual for Yoshi’s Island DS? That’s a cute name! I feel like it would fit better if this Snifit spat out lightning bolts instead of fire, though! I like that it’s pink. 7/10

Laser Snifit and Gunner Guy

Ohhhhhohohohohoho!!!!! Ohohoho!!!! This is where the real fun begins!!! Look at these friends!!!! I love them!!!! This is what Slurp Snifit up there should have been!! The snout is the defining trait of Snifits, and these two have bumped it up to eleven!!! Apparently Gunner Guy can’t move on his own, though, which is heartbreaking. Also, he might not actually be a Snifit??? He might be a Shy Guy with a gun on his face! Is that what all Snifits are? Are they the same thing? I choose to believe they aren’t, and the snout is somehow biologically part of their face along with the rest of the mask. I’m rambling, though. Laser Snifit earns an 11/10 from me, while Gunner Guy gets an 8/10 for making me feel sad while still somehow being delightful.

Propeller Mucho

What the heck?!  What a whimsical name!! Unfortunately, this is the only image of them on the Mario Wiki, but they still look pretty cute to me! I imagine they’re the same as Fly Guys, but like. Snifits. I love the idea that Shy Guys and Snifits are kind of mechanical or toy-like in nature. Maybe that’s why they live in the toy box in Paper Mario??? Anyways, 6/10. I wish I could see them better! They would have scored higher, but they’re outdone by.......

Flying Snifit

A friend with a way less whimsical name,  but a way more whimsical appearance!! Look at those wings!!!! Most Mario enemies, when given the gift of flight, have cute little angel wings slapped onto them - but not Flying Snifit!! No, instead, this little garden buddy sprouts a pair of adorable cartoon butterfly wings!!  I adore this Snifit!! They’re going to get a whopping 11/10 from me! We aren’t done with Flying Snifit just yet, however, because they also show up with a couple of friends!!

Flifit and Sneed

I told you our garden party wasn’t over yet!! These are also easily some of the most inventive varieties of Snifit!! There are only a couple of others that stray from the general Snifit body plan, and these two are both some of the weirdest and cutest!! God, I love them. Flifit spits out Sneed, which in turn spits out (presumably inanimate) seeds! I love whatever the heck Sneed is doing in that animation. I choose to interpret it as a little butt waggle. Shake it, Sneed!! For both of these friends, I’m handing out a solid 10/10!!!

Snufit

So, like I said before, there are only a couple of Snifit-adjacent friends that change up the general body plan that is Snifit! Snufits are ghost Snifits that live in Hazy Maze Cave in Super Mario 64!! They’re very cute, but when I was little I was actually kind of afraid of them? I’m not sure why! In the original game on the Nintendo 64, Snufit was round and shaped like a Boo, which is pretty cute! I love the idea that all ghosts in the Mario universe are just big round balls of ghostliness. This version of Snufit gets an 8/10! It’s pretty cute, but the redesign of Snufit in the DS version is so much more appealing to me, for some reason! I think it’s the floppy little sleeves. As someone who always wore sweaters that were much too big for me and always seemed to have “puppy paws” as my mom would call them, this new Snufit just calls to me. Also, shouldn’t these guys have been called Spookums?? I guess Mario RPG did come out before Mario 64, but it wouldn’t be the first time some weird name shenanigans had gone down in the Mario universe. Anyways, the redesign of Snufit gets an 11/10 from me!! It’s up there with Ice Snifit and Flying Snifit as one of my favorites!!

Spider

Hey, these guys aren’t even in any of the games!! I think that should change though. I like them a lot!! Pretty creepy, and bizarre, though! I used to watch The Super Mario Bros. Super Show! a fair amount when i was little, but I must have missed whichever episode these guys appeared in. I think I would have remembered them for the rest of my life if I had!! I used to be really afraid of spiders when I was little. I think they’re really neat now though!! Still, I’m only going to give these guys an 8/10 for virtue of never being used in a game, and also for being kind of creepy and also for not having eight legs. I know that stuff isn’t their fault! It’s just the way things are sometimes. Life is cruel, especially to spiders.

Spiky Snifit

Okay, these guys are the last of the official Snifit friends! I probably should have put them up with Flifit, but I wanted them to stand on their own. I love cacti a lot, being from a desert, and saguaro cacti are just the best!! I also love how Flifit seems to have their mask organically growing from their stem, but Spiky here could easily just be a normal cactus with a Snifit mask slapped onto it!! Does it have a face underneath?? Is it literally just a cactus??? Could you make anything into a Snifit by putting a mask onto it??? Spiky Snifit here raises a lot of questions, and answers literally none of them, and for that I love them. 9.5/10!! 

Finally, I would like to give an honorable mention to one other Mario enemy that I think has been unfairly left behind and forgotten. Let’s take a moment to remember a dear friend....

Tweeter

Tweeter is an enemy that debuted in Doki Doki Panic/ Super Mario Bros 2 alongside Shy Guy, Snifit, Bob-omb, Birdo, and many other friends that we all know, love, and continually see in Mario games even today!! Unfortunately, unlike many of the other enemies from Mario 2, Tweeter hasn’t really ever shown up again! They make the occasional cameo here and there, but even those are few and far between!! Why haven’t Tweeters ever shown up again?? It’s unclear, but they’re also pretty high up on my list of favorite mario enemies! It turns out I just love masks and snoots, especially if that snoot is also a beak. If I were to give these guys a score, and I will, I would give them a 100/100!! Gone, but never forgotten (by me).

If you read all of this, thank you for your time!! I love you, and so does Snifit and all their many friends!! Feel free to shoot me a message telling me your favorite Mario enemy, and check out the blog @weirdmarioenemies​​ !! I’ve been binge reading their entire archive, and as you could probably guess, it heavily inspired me to make this post! I just love Snifit so much, and wanted to spread the love!! I hope you all come to love them as much as I do. Also, @nintendo​, please bring back Tweeter and also make Snifit a playable character in Mario Kart, Mario Party, Mario Tennis, your next main Mario platformer, et cetera, et cetera... In fact, let’s ditch Mario and make the games all about Snifit!!!

New Super Snifit Bros!! Coming soon to a store near you!!

[bluemilkboys]

Kev’s Comic Book Odyssey #1 - Spider-Geddon and The Batman Who Laughs

Hello there! Haven’t posted to this blog in a minute! Last time I did I talked about Luke Skywalker in The Last Jedi, what an absolute riot that was, huh? Well this is going to be different. In my isolation in attempt to help stop the spread of coronavirus, I have dived deeper into comic books. 

Now, the world of comics is one of the most complicated mediums of entertainment one can simply just venture into. And to avoid having existential anxiety about knowing exactly what was going on in the Marvel and DC Universes respectively, I devised a very simple method of how I would get my feet wet. My favorite superheroes are Batman and Spider-Man. So when trying to find something to invest my time in, I sought out the popular stories from those characters. This rang true more for Batman than Spider-Man (I’ve been on a pretty heavy DC kick in general lately).

So in my story hopping, I found myself really sinking my teeth into two stories in particular, Spider-Geddon, and The Batman Who Laughs. Let’s start with Spider-Geddon. 

What originally drew me to this story was the inclusion of the version of Spider-Man from the 2018 PS4 game, and my familiarity with the previous event of this nature, Spider-Verse. It’s relatively easy on new readers like myself, and I and I had enough familiarity with characters like the Superior Spider-Man to be able to infer enough and be able to understand the story completely. I guess I should give props to more stories that are able to do that until I gain enough comic book literacy to where it’s not needed anymore, huh?

Anyway, the story centers around the villains from the previous Spider-Verse event, and they’re back for more. And to be honest, the Inheritors are fine, but I wasn’t focusing on them much. They make an immediate impact in their first big confrontation with the Spider-people, killing a few of them including Spider-Man Noir, but this story was much more for me about the seeds of dissent that were slowly and gradually planted throughout the series. Otto Octavius, the Superior Spider-Man, is very adamant that he be the one to lead the team of Spider-people in the absence of Earth-616 Peter Parker, who is gone for the majority of the story, and throughout the story there is a natural sense of distrust in Otto, due to him you know, being a supervillain before, and all that. Otto is determined to end the threat of the Inheritors forever by killing them, something that the Spider-Gang elected not to do the first time around, and honestly I think this is where you see one of the weaker parts of the story. Maybe I shouldn’t call it a weak point as much as it is a missed opportunity. I think the entire moral conflict on whether to subdue or kill the Inheritors is not explored enough, and there was an opportunity there to do a little bit of a character deconstruction about Spider-Man’s willingness, or lack thereof to kill his enemies. And I LOVE character deconstruction. It’s one of my favorite things that people can do with a character. To display such an understanding of a character, that you’re able to peel back the surface layer stuff and give readers a deep tissue narrative massage, I LOVE that shit. 

I also really enjoyed PS4 Spidey’s role in this story. He was obviously not in Spider-Verse, and I don’t think anyone should have expected him to come in here and be the center of attention, so the way they utilized him really resonated with me. He was the newcomer who didn’t really have a full grasp on everything that was going on, and so I was able to appreciate his perspective because I personally do not have a full grasp on everything that’s going on. Not just in the Marvel Universe though. Just generally. In life. Anyway, PS4 Spidey gets consistently surprised and amazed at all the different Spider-Totems across the multiverse, including my personal favorite moment in the entire series right here:

All in all, I had a great time reading this event, it was a really fun Spider-Man story, and not to spoil, but the twist toward the end really got me. I’m not sure if that’s because I’m a novice in the game, or if it was just that good, but nonetheless, I still enjoyed it. Spider-Geddon gets a solid 8.5/10 good book!

Alright let’s get edgy, lads. It’s time to talk about The Batman Who Laughs. 

BWL is such a wild part of DC’s Rebirth. And according to people I talk to who’s opinions I trust, Rebirth is largely a big stinky mess, so I feel confident in saying this is one of the bright spots. God, this character, it’s entire existence is so chaotic. BWL exists in a negative version of earth, in a “dark multiverse” where different versions of Batman have become evil in different ways. Among them is the Batman Who Laughs, a terrifying fusion of Batman’s intellect, and the immoral propensity of the Joker. His origin issue was absolutely fucking wild, and a hell of a way to introduce a character, but now, he’s got his own series. From like 2 years ago. But I digress, let’s talk about it!

What I liked about this series was that it returned an element of horror that is always somewhat present in Batman’s best stories. I also love when an author knows a character so well, that they feel comfortable deconstructing that character and really exploring what makes, in this case, the Batman the Batman. BWL does a good job blending those two concepts. We’ve seen Batman pushed to the edge before, but me personally, I have never read a story that featured Batman getting pushed by someone who knows him so intimately, literally another version of himself. The story however is relatively low stakes, and relies a lot on the power of the characters and how attached you are to them. I wasn’t familiar enough with Jim Gordon’s son really at all before reading this, and a decent part of the story revolves around him, so I guess that was one aspect of it that fell short for me. And for a story literally called, “The Batman Who Laughs” there really isn’t a deep dive into the namesake character. I would actually even go as far as to say the Grim Knight gets more attention. It’s a good Batman story, but what drew me in was the Batman Who Laughs character, but this story doesn’t have much to say about him opposite of Batman.

I think Batman has been in a weird spot since the New 52, and this story, while imperfect, I believe was a step in the right direction. 8/10.

Thanks so much for reading this first in hopefully my long series detailing my journey into comics! Make sure you check out the Blue Milk Boys podcast, and follow me on Twitter @kevinOMO_. See y’all next time. 

[thechocobros]

My little (not so little) Kingdom Hearts III’s review :)

(possible spoilers under the cut)

Somebody asked for my personal opinion about the game, so, here I am! I’ll try to be as objective as possible, even if you probably know already my deep affection for this saga and for its creators XD

Let’s start with the positive things, the things that really impressed me the most about KH3, which are: the graphic (even the in-game one), the gameplay, the huge amount of enjoyable exploration. And then I’ll start voting the rest, by giving my opinion. 

 - Graphic: 10/10. I was able to see the pores on Sora’s face and on Terra’s hands. I was able to zoom on the smallest details with my Gummiphone and still find some amazing details in the landscape. Literally EVERYTHING was so well done i had to stop more than once to admire what i was playing. It was stunning. Let’s not even talk about the Disney cutscenes, because those were a masterpiece and i have no words to describe them. 

- Gameplay: 10/10. Listen, i never played a game where there were so MANY options for the gameplay. I beated the 13 darknesses by using attractions, limits, different forms, combined moves, special abilities, combos, different keyblades ... There were so many minigames, ideas, i fought on Baymax, i fought as a captain of a ship, i cooked, I did treasure hunts, took pictures, the gummiship style too ... every fricking world offered so many different gameplays options i even freaked out because i wasn’t able to learn them all. It was so FUN!

- Exploration; 10/10. Let’s be real, every world (except Twilight Town lol) was as huge as all the Disney worlds of the previous KH games together. Really, i was lost. It was even too much. It will take me a lifetime to explore all the worlds in all its beautiful details xD for ex in the POTC’s world we are able to access to at least 6 different islands + Port Royal + underwater + the battles setting + we command an entire sailing ship. Also, have you try to collect all the lucky emblems? Because I think they all are in some areas i still don’t know they exist. It was AMAZING. 

- Music: 8/10. I love “Face my fears” so much, i like “Don’t think twice” a lot, Utada is always a queen. As for Yoko, she never dissapoints me either, even though this time she didn’t came out with “new” brilliant melodies like she did in the other games. She mostly arranged differently songs and themes we already were familiar with, which is nostalgic and happily welcomed anyway. + Bonus Points to Somnus song mixed together with Hikari. Wow. 

- Plot twists/Surprise/content/plot elements: 8.5/10. Every Kingdom Hearts game needs a huge amount of “WHAt-THE-moments” and KH3 makes no exception. The final battles and the endings were a concentrated of twists and turns, starting from Yen Sid, to Ephemer, from Sora dying (like twice, during this game? the last one almost got me tho), to Kairi dying, from Xigbar’s real identity to Yozora officially inserted in KH’s main plot etc etc. It was a rollercoaster. And I loved it. Funny enough, the only “secret” that didn’t feel like a “secret” was the “secret” that Nomura defined the “biggest secret” XD ... aka Roxas xD I mean, they talked about making a replica for Roxas all the game long, so when Roxas actually appeared and claimed that Vexen made a replica for him, i was like ... yeah, thanks, that’s not a brand new information xD Talking about Vexen, him and the rest of the Organization had some really nice surprising elements, their story was worthy. 

- The narrative/structure/pace: 6.5/10. Ok, here’s the thing. Even if the actual story content was interesting and pretty good, there were problems in the pace and we all hardcore fans noticed it. Why was that? Because they changed some things they shouldn’t have changed in order to give more space to Disney worlds. 

For ex, I’m talking about the fact that we started our adventure in ... the Olympus world. I have nothing against that world of course. But in KH1 we started in Destiny Islands/Traverse Town. In KH2 we started in Twilight Town. In KHBBS we started in the Land of the Departure. In KH3 we should have respected traditions and start from an original world. Why? Because original worlds are strictly connected to the original characters’ development + main plot. By making Sora starting in a Disney world, they cut out an extremely important part in the KH3 story’s development, aka the very own basis. And  no, Twilight Town arrived 3 hours later, and was half as big as the other Disney worlds, so it doesn’t really stand the competion. 

  So, by putting so many Disney worlds and cutting out the original worlds, they confused the storyline’s pace. The actual story’s progression was reduced to some cutscenes between a world and another which is ... not a really good idea. We needed at least one or two more playable original worlds somewhere there in between, like KH2 had Radiant Garden and KH1 had Traverse Town, so that the story could have been developed  and the characters would have been able to meet and interact properly.

  In fact, the biggest problem is that the entire main plot is rushed in the last hours of the game. 35 hours of funny happy Disney gameplay. 5 hours of actual plot. It’s not balanced. The player didn’t feel the rising pressure for the final battle of light against darkness. No matter how epic the Keyblade War actually was, of course it felt a bit rushed, because it popped out all of a sudden and wasn’t smoothly inserted from the beginning of the game. 

  I can actually justify this choice though: KH3′s purpose was to give a conclusion to Xehanort’s saga. Which means they didn’t plan to develop the story or the characters more than what they already had in the previous games. They just wanted to show a proper “conclusion”. Not “development”. 

  It’s not the choice i would have taken in terms of storytelling, but it’s an option so i’m not really angry about it. It worked anyway because almost all the characters really had a solid background plot. .... almost. Which sadly leads to the sore point of the game. Here we go.

- Characters development: 7/10. Kingdom Hearts has a large quantity of very developed characters. Kingdom Hearts’ original characters are the ones who entered in out hearts years ago and we love them for a reason. They’re all well characterized, with specific strengths and weaknesses. Which means that no matter how weird the pace of KH3 could have been, the characters have been so well written in the previous games that they were able to tollerate everything in terms or story telling. Sora, Riku, Aqua, Roxas, Axel, Ventus, Xion, Terra, Naminè .... they all had a major role in KH’s plot on their shoulders and unique facets. But one character was strongly penalized by this the rhythm of KH3: Kairi. 

  Unlike most of the other characters that belong to the famous trios, Kairi could never count on a strong background, nor a good characterization. 

  Even though i liked her in KH1 (where she at least interacted with both Sora and Riku multiple times and had a part in the main plot, even if she was comatose for 80% of the time), it’s not a secret that she got benched immediately after that. KH2 didn’t make her justice with all that being kidnapped, and in the next games she completely dissapeared even. She was never involved in the story ever again. What am i referring to?

  In Birth By Sleep, only Sora and Riku met all the members of the wayfinder trio and played an actual part in their lives. Kairi barely meet Aqua once, and never played an active part in her life anyway. I mean, Aqua never needed Kairi for anything, never. On the contrary, both Sora and Riku were vital for all the members of the wayfinder trio, back then and later on.

  In Chain of Memories, Coded, 358/2 days ... Kairi was replaced with two other girls that quickly became more interesting than Kairi herself, aka Naminé and Xion. In those stories Kairi is barely mentioned and almost never appears. But Sora and Riku ... oh, Sora and Riku! They’re the PROTAGONISTS. They always interact, they always appear, they always do stuff. 

  Let’s not even talk about Dream Drop Distance, where it’s JUST Sora and RIku. 

  What’s my point? The Destiny trio isn’t a trio, it’s a duo. Kairi is ALWAYS put in a corner, she never has a part in the story. 

  I’m not talking about ships, i don’t care about ships, I don’t ship Soriku nor Sokai, it’s not about this. The problem is Kairi’s character development, which did not exist. Not only a development, but even a purpose was missing. 

  So, since i kinda liked her in KH1 and the potential was there, i thought that KH3 would have set things right for her. I had high hopes especially because of Axel, I was like, “WOW here it is a great potential for a good, healthy, platonic relationship, finally Kairi found someone to be paired with and do stuff. We will finally see her being weak, finding her power again, maybe she will be a playable character, maybe she will interact with BOTH Sora and RIku too, making jokes, express her preferences etc etc” yeah and what we got? Kairi is reduced to a mere man pain object again. She almost forgot about Axel once that Sora appeared. She got kidnapped here and there all along. Again. She kinda forced Sora to eat that fruit and never asked for his opinion, while Riku was having an existential drama going on just some steps away. But i don’t think she cares for Riku anyway since she never had any kind of bond time with him and isn’t interested in his problems. She fought once (badly), revealing that her training was somehow useless (she had to be saved by Sora and the others). She gets killed (pretty stupidly too) and Sora had to sacrifice to bring her back. And what made me angry the most: Sora’s heart gets lost in the process of saving her but it’s NOT Kairi the one going after him in the secret ending. IT’S RIKU. LIKE WHAAAT?? Riku?? She can’t even take her girly keyblade and go after the boy she is supposed to love and that died for her?? Riku has to do it? Really? It’s ridiculous. ... 

  Furthermore, she wasn’t a playable character. The only characters that we were able to play were Sora, Riku and .... Aqua! Pretty funny. (I think they are Nomura’s favorites, i don’t know.)

  Kairi’s only part in KH3 was changing outfit and “being Sora’s light” somehow but ... that was so much out of the blue and most likely an isolated moment. It could have been a nice coronation for a developed love story but the problem is that no development was there before.

  So, going back to my point.

  Even if i would have chosen another way to tell the story, the rushed pace of KH3 worked for everyone anyway, except for Kairi. Kairi needed a different treatment.

  But at this point i don’t think she will ever get it, probably Nomura doesn’t like her too much since he decided to make another DreamDropDistance game settled in Insommia next time xD so i give up on her. I’ll focus on the other beautiful female characters of this game.

  Anyway, even if i talked a lot about why Kairi was another flop, i want to point out how interesting some characters got instead. I’m talking about Xigbar (great plot twist), Saix, Demyx, Vexen (Vexen had so much importance, i mean, i didn’t expect him to be the one moving kh3’s plot), Luxord, Marluxia, Larxene and Repliriku! They used to be marginal characters and now they turned out to be protagonists, it’s amazing.

- FF characters: 7/10. I really loved Verum Rex’s surprise, it’s a clever idea to recycle the Versus characters and concepts Nomura couldn’t bring to life. Now that Nomura turned them into original characters, he has the copyright over them again thanks to Disney and he can use them as much as he wants, bringing the “ff characters cameos in kh” on a brand new level. Starting from the next game, we will have semi-FFcharacters included in the main plot, not just having a cameo here and there, which is amazing!

  But. This doesn’t mean i didn’t miss actual FF characters in Kh3. Cloud, Leon&Co left a hole in kh’s tradition.

Let’s sum it up my notes: 

Graphic: 10/10 +

Gameplay: 10/10 +

Exploration: 10/10 +

Music: 8/10 +

Plot twists/Surprise/Content/Plot elements: 8.5/10. +

The narrative/structure/pace: 6.5/10. +

Characters development: 7/10. +

FF characters: 7/10. +

Total = 8,3

AND ... THAT’S IT FOR NOW I GUESS? xD

[livingasaghost]

lover album review.

i forgot that you existed / such a CUTE bop!!! like it’s not my favorite opener obviously but i like how sweet it is like - Yeah! i’m indifferent! i don’t give a shit about you! also it’s catchy as hell and i love the production and how she’s kinda speak singing. and when she mentions rep! oof! a solid beginning but nothing super overwhelming. just a BOP! 7/10

cruel summer / definitely getaway car meets out of the woods thus it is a JAM i LOVE IT the more i listen to it - especially the bridge oof!! i have a feeling it’s gonna be so good on tour but right now i don’t think it’s in my top 5? i like that it sounds super 80s though - and her lil scream at the end in the bridge!!! oof!! “i love you aint that the worst thing you ever heard!!!” 8.5/10

lover / first listen was VERY subpar but the longer i listen to the cute lil chorus and the bridge i’m SOLD! it reminds me of kesha meets kacey musgraves and i really love love LOVE how the chorus goes “MY MY MY MY...lover.” it’s just very cute and sweet and LOVERLY and i hope i can relate to it one day! not the best title track but definitely gets better on every listen. 7/10

the man / i thought this would be more of a fave (and i think it will be down the line) but right now i’m just hung up on the IDEA it’s such a good CONCEPT and obviously the lyrics are INCREDIBLE!! i think it’s a little underwhelming in some ways but i really love the bridge and the implications and the BITCHES OOF GO OFF SIS! also sounds VERY 80s 8/10

the archer / this remains my favorite pre-release single and i think it’s still in my top 5 of the album. like the lyrics, the production, the message...all of it makes it a god tier track five. i think it’ll shift around a little but i still think it’s just...FLAWLESS. i love the bridge and the end bits so much!!! 9.5/10

i think he knows / AN UNEXPECTED BOP!!!! I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!! great production, catchy af, i don’t even care if the lyrics are almost meaningless it’s so FUN!!! i really want to hear it on tour honestly! and the chorus kinda reminds me of beyonce in a way??? AND THE DRUM PART INTO THE FINAL CHORUS!!! AFTER THE BRIDGE!!! POETIC CINEMA!!!! FSDGJLDFSFHJ 8.5/10

miss americana & the heartbreak prince / OKAY so i think this is one that will change a LOT in the next few months bc first listen i was like “....ew” but it’s very much a lana del rey/king of my heart kinda song? nothing really WRONG with it just...not my fave? so it’s at the bottom bc i’m kinda indifferent to it? i like the thoughts behind it though so who knows. i feel like the more i listen the more i’ll love it! but rn i don’t the hype lol 7/10

paper rings / A FUCKING BOP OH MY GOD!!! THE FIRST TIME I HEARD THE BEGINNING I COULDNT STOP SMILING!!!! it reminds me of blitzkrieg bop in the best way!!! 1 2 3 4 !!!!! like i didn’t think this song would sound like this but in a GOOD WAy i feel like all the songs i didnt think id like are the ones that are just HUGE BOPS! 9.5/10

cornelia street / so the first time i heard it i don’t think i was that attached to it but the SECOND TIME OOF!!! a lot of people said this would be my fave and honestly.......it might be. it’s so sad but also hopeful and happy and sweet and i really like the sentiment of it! and the production is SO GOOOD and it’s catchy too? 9.5/10

death by a thousand cuts / this song is like...kinda weird but also it’s amazing?? i love the guitar part and the piano background like OOF it’s so catchy and beachy and cute? but it also sounds like bleachers? idk like it’s a break up song but it’s also a bop! ALSO THE BRIDGE!!! SO GOOD!!!! 8/10

london boy / THE DARK HORSE I NEVER SAW COMING! this is very TIWWCHNT and it reminds me of early pure heroine lorde but it’s just SO CATCHY AND GOOD!!! and also obviously it’s red white and royal blue GARBAGE i just LOVE IT!! and it’s so fun bc like now i’ve been to london so i can like ~relate~ you know?? BUT GOD I LOVE THE ENGLISH!!!!! so anyway tour is gonna pop OFF this is def in the my top five i think 9.5/10

soon you’ll get better / ...what the fuck taylor

but for real the guitar on this is so soft and genius and the lyrics are perfect and i was having VIVID flashbacks to when my grandma had cancer and it’s truly...so much to handle. she sounds so young on this song like never grow up vibes except...it’s cancer. 10/10

false god / so first listen i was like WHOMST IS THIS and it was very forgettable but the more i listen the more i think it’s growing on me? the production is so fresh and unlike taylor but the lyrics are really cool and it kinda reminds me of dress in some ways? i think i’ll like this more in the cold when it’s really dark out at night like the sax reminds me a lot of bon iver in a good way OOF OKAY I LIKE THIS MORE EVERY TIME I LISTEN THIS IS FINE but first time i was very much like......confused lol 7/10

you need to calm down / OKAY LISTEN THIS SONG IS A BOP AND IT REMAINS SO! if the archer hadn’t popped up this would be my fave pre-release single it’s just a KNOCK OUT!!! and it’s gonna go OFF ON TOUR!!!! i love the lyrics and the concept and the beat and it will always be a FAVE honestly 8/10

afterglow / another song i didn’t like the first time and now when i listen more i’m like “...okay she has rights” like it’s cute and it reminds me of miley cyrus in some ways?? but it’s also kinda forgettable sometimes and i have no serious attachment to it? who knows pretty average and yet sometimes it’s great idk v confusing 7/10

me! / I WILL ALWAYS BE BITTER THAT THEY GOT RID OF SPELLING IS FUN!!!!  but anyway this song gets too much hate for such a BOP like i know i didn’t love it the first time but she’s CUTE and she’s FUN (like spelling) and honestly even if she isn’t the best on the album i still go hard whenever i listen so FUCK ALL OF YALL 8/10

it’s nice to have a friend / i still don’t know what the fuck this song is. genuinely. like it isn’t...bad per say...she sounds good and the lyrics aren’t bad and the production isn’t...awful it’s just...weird? idk what it’s trying to be? and it’s short? i just don’t get it lol like it’s one of my least favorite songs of hers. who knows. maybe we’ll evolve idk. ?/10

daylight / i think it was a little underwhelming at first, but also it’s like........beautiful. i thought this would be my favorite and i can’t tell if i’m just projecting and saying it’s my fave when it isn’t but like.......the aesthetic, the lyrics, the production, the spoken words at the end, the concept.......it’s what i WANT. it’s my VIBE. it’s my 2019 BRAND. so anyway i’m curious to see if it stays at the top but like........i want this for the rest of forever. anyway. 10/10

extra comments //

(me giving these songs number rankings: what the fuck am i doing)

so like as per usual GENIUS but i will say i was v underwhelmed on the first listen. which happens. to be expected. but it’s all growing on me just like it always does!!! i am so excited for tour, so happy she’s happy...all of these songs are just so pure and sweet and catchy and i LOVE HER!! hehe lover but um yeah it’s definitely not in my top ranking - like i think the rankings as of now are speak now = 1989 > rep > lover = red > fearless > debut (but who the fuck knows) the longer it goes the more i think red is going to move down past fearless someday. anyway YAY LOVER!!!

— aug 23, 2019 @ 8:08pm

[novantinuum]

jen’s doctor who s11 review

On the whole!

I really enjoyed series 11 for its nice change in pace and especially the relationship built up between Graham and Ryan. I really liked how many of the episodes were lighter and kinda more adventure-y in nature than in past, instead of constant “the world is gonna end” danger. Like I love those kinds of episodes, believe me, but the lighter tone is very welcomed after many series of heart wrenching angst ahahahah! 

I loved how they handled the historical episodes this series, and really dug into the truth of human condition within those time periods, and took risks there. I actually learned a lot about the time periods they visited- for example, I never really heard much about the Pakistan partition in school. 

Thirteen is precious and I want to hug her. She’s so full of hope and that makes me so happy! :DDD I love how she’s a sciency tinkerer and likes cobbling stuff together out of whatever loose ends she can find. I’m still waiting for her to snap, though- maybe that’s just me as an angst lord talking, but I want to see her super super angry. The scene in The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos with her sternly disagreeing with Graham was very good though. But anyways, I love her positivity and her quirky alien charm, and her character feels like a natural progression of where the Doctor left off at the end of Twice Upon a Time. The Doctor has gone through a lot of healing since the Time War, a lot of self reflection and forgiving themself, and Thirteen is absolutely a product of that and it shows. It’s so nice to see them back on their feet, unshackled by that guilt finally, just wandering about the universe like they always did. 

Yasmin is so sweet and so loyal, and h o h boy if there’s anyone I can see sticking with the Doctor until the bitter end out of this crew it’s her. (*nervous laughter*) Out of all the crew she’s the one who’s had the least development though, so I’m looking forward to seeing where she goes as a character moving forward. Also, I hope we see her family more, I like them! Maybe in the New Years special, we’ll see. I’ve absolutely hit the “ADOPT KID” button on Ryan, the more I think about him the more I love him- just, all this time he’s been looking for belonging, for people who aren’t gonna leave him behind like his dad, and he had that with his nan Grace- but he didn’t know if Graham was gonna be the same or if he was only there for him bc of association with Grace. But now through all these adventures through space and time he has absolute proof that Graham will be there for him, and so he’s made the conscious decision to make Graham his family. And Graham, hhh... his grieving throughout the series, while not acting as a shadow on it, was always woven through and it’s nice to see both him and Ryan actually make peace with things through seeing Tim Shaw again and giving him his humble pie. 

In the end when it comes to this series, I love the strong found family vibes it gives. Graham and Ryan and Yaz, they all knew each other in some way before, but they didn’t truly know each other. And through being thrown together with the Doctor, entering her wild adventurous life, they got to grow closer as friends, but more importantly, as a family. The whole series the Doctor was looking for a word to describe her little ragtag group, and she wasn’t exactly sure if “fam” was the right one, but in the end it’s what she settles on because this has become a family. 

Now, what I’m hoping to see more of in the future! 

1) I’d love to see more extended domestic-y TARDIS scenes! We’ve got a lot of pre/post endcap TARDIS scenes, but I’d love to see more small little convos between characters on the way to their destinations, in between, etc. For as long as these episodes were I feel like so much time was spent providing exposition and story for the plot, but I’d love to see more fun nonsense. More glimpses at what they get up to in between, if that makes any sense. (As an example of what I mean, we got a bit of this in The Tsuranga Conundrum, at the very beginning when they were just poking about a junkyard planet, and I quite liked that.)

2) As the characters keep developing I’d love to see more conflict arise between them to test their friendships. We saw some good moments of this with the Doctor telling Ryan to stay behind with Hanne in It Takes You Away after he made a kinda narrow-minded comment about her disability, and when the Doctor flat out told Graham that if he killed Tim Shaw he wouldn’t be traveling with her anymore in the finale. I’d love to see more of this.

3) This may just be because I’m really queer, but I want the Doctor to snap and yell and get really angry at something. That’s the ONE thing that felt entirely missing from this series. In the end I get the sense that this Doctor has a far greater reign on her emotions and self because she’s healed quite a bit, but I still know she’s capable of that righteous anger and I’d love to see Jodie show off her full range with a scene like that.

4) We’ll probably get this in the New Years special, but I’m super anticipating Thirteen facing the Daleks. This is a quintessential thing for every Doctor, in my opinion, and I can’t wait for when they (hopefully!) eventually do that.

5) More of a plot arc. I definitely know the lack of a tight plot arc was because they wanted it to be more accessible for people to just tune in and watch without context,, as they’re gaining some new fans, but I hope that there’s more of a return to an ongoing series plot arc with this next series since everything’s been established. I personally really like those, because I get to be a plot arc detective! I will say that I’m very pleased that Tim Shaw was brought back for the finale, though- that acted as a very nice bookend and helped tie up all the emotional threads.

6) Also not exactly anything I can fault this series for, because I can tell one of the points/themes of it was “not everything is what it seems on the surface” and “sometimes the real monsters,,, are humanity” and I very much respect that, but I do wanna see some more just... alien baddies who ARE baddies and not misunderstood. Listen,, I’m a simple minded person. Love me some monsters! 

My rankings! 

For context, I’m generally very easy with my ratings. I’m not rating them on how critically perfect they are as plots or anything, this is purely based on how much I enjoyed them. I’ve only actually rated nine episodes of Doctor Who 2005-present with scores of 6 or below.

10- Absolutely SUPERB  9- Excellent! 8- Great! 7- Good 6- Okay

1) Demons of the Punjab    (10) This ep made me cry more than any episode of Doctor Who has in a very long time. Incredibly poignant, stunning music and cinematography. Taught me a whole lot I never knew about the partition and how it affected everyday people. I liked how the Doctor assumed the whole time that these aliens were  A good Yaz centric ep, too. It ranks 7th in my list of all-time favorites.  

2) It Takes You Away   (9.5) Wowee, another very poignant one! Some FANTASTIC acting from Jodie in this ep, and a very trippy concept with the sentient universe. Loved getting to see each companion getting a good role to play. ALSO CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT HOW MUCH I STAN THAT FROG??? AND THE DOCTOR SEDUCING AN ENTIRE UNIVERSE???? B R U H. Hanne’s actress did a wonderful job too! 

3) Kerblam!   (9) What a heckin fun episode! This one will definitely become one of my comfort eps, I can already tell. The secondary characters were all lovely, and the bots were delightfully unsettling too! I spent the whole thing going “wow I totally experienced this working at Amazon” and I thought that was pretty funny. Also, I might highlight all the wonderful Graham snark we got in this one. 

4) Rosa    (9) Gahhh this was a hard one to watch, but very truthful in its depiction of the time period, and a lovely tribute to an incredibly courageous woman. Shout out to how the ep forced Graham to recognize and accept his white privilege (and the Doctor too for that matter), the scene with Ryan and Yaz discussing racism they’ve had to endure, and also for the scene with the Doctor making jokes about Banksy. That made me laugh. “Banksy doesn’t have one of these! Or do I?”

5) The Battle of Ranskoor Av Kolos    (9) I was VERY glad to see Tim Shaw return for some finished business, and how it allowed Graham and Ryan to finally get a bit of peace for what happened to Grace because of him. This was a solid ep, with some SOLID character moments between Graham and the Doctor and Graham and Ryan. The Ux were interesting, too.

6) The Woman Who Fell to Earth    (8.5) Solid, fun episode. It wastes no time in setting up who Thirteen will be. Still one of my favorite scenes in this whole series so far is when she builds her own sonic screwdriver- GOD the music there is so damn iconic. And gahhh I love Grace so much. How dare they make me love a character so much and then let her die? Rude. That’s homophobia. XD

7) The Witchfinders   (8.5) The Doctor gets dunked in water and has soaked hair. Dare I say more? No, but I was glad to see an ep with an alien danger that actually IS an alien danger that seeks to destroy and conquer, I always love those- and this one, with weird sentient mud that can fill corpses, was delightfully grim. Willow was a great secondary character, too- loved her especially. 8) The Ghost Monument  ��(8) Okay so I really loved how slice-of-life this episode was? We actually got to know our secondary characters Angstrom and Epzo and I appreciated that. The bit with the Doctor thinking the TARDIS was gone forever at the end... hhhhhhng... that was such a good scene. You could just see the hope drained from her face, and then to see it all rush back as she finally found her?? W o w I’m so emo, y’all ;D;

9) The Tsuranga Conundrum  (7) So I enjoyed this one, but there were some kinda oddly phrased bits of dialogue in it that marks it down for me. The Pting is a delightfully weird and cursed creature, 10/10, would yeet out of a spacecraft. I already mentioned this, but I LOVE the scene in the junkyard and how slice-of-life it was. I also appreciate how someone called out the Doctor on being selfish during this. 10) Arachnids in the UK   (6.5) So this episode was riding right on the edge of “ehh” for me, but it still has some great moments in it, with the Doctor awkwardly interacting with Yasmin’s family and all those heckin spiders bee-boppin down the hallways to the tune of rap music. XD I can’t exactly pick out why it was an “eh” for me, but it just didn’t click. Maybe I was just hoping it’d be an alien thing and was kinda left wanting with the way the episode felt kinda... unfinished. Like, there’s still a bunch of giant spiders? They didn’t solve that. They just- trapped them and left. I dunno I was left wanting with this ep.

[eurovosion]

 some thoughts on this year’s entries

or i guess just a ranking with comments tacked on

albania - this year’s nf season was a let down for me, partly because a lot of the winning songs weren’t the best on offer, and partly because albania picked first and nothing could live up to it. i love the depth this has, the dark, almost tribal vibes, and most of all i love how they didn’t fuck up the revamp like they usually do. if this is staged correctly, i think this could do really well. 10/10

greece - i feel like this has been overlooked in the wider fandom, which is odd because greek entries are usually pretty polarising, for better or for worse. regardless, i really like this. it’s atmospheric, powerful as hell, and katerine is more than capable of nailing it live. don’t count greece out just yet! 9.5/10

portugal - festival da canção was easily the best nf this year and the portuguese public picked wisely. telemóveis is such an intriguing song with a really curious sound, so traditional yet so modern at the same time. i’m not 100% on the staging, but they have time to figure it out. 9.5/10

spain - la venda wasn’t the song i was rooting for in the selection (rip todo bien, never forgotten) but i’m fully on board with it now. this works so well with a big audience, and you just know that the crowd will be on his side. if this doesn’t go top 10 at the very least i’ll be stunned. 9/10

cyprus - this is just as instant as fuego for me. not sure if tamta will do as well as eleni, but the cypriot delegation has definitely found their winning formula. 9/10

malta - malta is not fucking around this year. this is a verified banger, and their best entry in years, perhaps their best ever. take as many youtube ads as you want, michela, you deserve them. 8.5/10

azerbaijan - without a doubt, azerbaijan is back with a vengeance. you can tell they’re determined to set the record straight and prove that last year was just a blip, because this is great and hopefully the live performance reflects that. 8.5/10

denmark - i really should hate this, but i can’t. it’s so innocent and cheerily optimistic in a way that i can only be jealous of whilst humming along to the chorus. this deserves to do well. 8/10

italy - it took me a little while to warm up to soldi, but once i finally got there i really started to appreciate it. i don’t think it’s a winner, but it’s a very good song, and in the end that’s all that matters. 8/10

san marino - yes, serhat is in my top 10, and what of it? you only wish your fave could write a song in ten minutes and have it go off like this. and yes, if he doesn’t qualify you’ll catch me openly sobbing in the streets for weeks. 8/10

switzerland - an unabashed bop with some actual choreography, but lacking lyrically. then again, so was fuego and that popped off live. he’s also working with the same stage director as eleni, which can only be good news for him. 7.5/10

the netherlands - don’t get me wrong, it’s a very polished song and i’m sure duncan’s great but like... is that it? this is the big fan favourite? i’m very whelmed. 7.5/10

armenia - i was expecting something like yete karogh es from srbuk, so this came completely out of left field in the best way possible. i thought we’d lost our token edgy pop song when ukraine dropped out, but armenia saved us at the last minute. the only thing i’m worried about are her vocals, because, from what i’ve seen, she isn’t the most confident performer. 7/10

serbia - another respectable but ultimately pretty safe pick from serbia this year. nevena has a really strong voice and she sells the song well, so i think she’ll avoid another moje 3 style placement. 7/10

germany - first of all, aly ryan was robbed. secondly, thank god the surprise song didn’t win. thirdly, this is alright. nothing spectacular, but it’s cute and the spinning stage was a great stylistic choice. 7/10

latvia - thank you latvia for letting this win and rejecting markus riva’s basic ass for the sixth year in a row WHEW i really love the whole atmosphere that surrounds this. barring a miracle, however, i don’t think it’ll qualify, but it’s still a good attempt. 6.5/10

sweden - i don’t think it’s john’s most solid composition, but it’s a decent entry nevertheless and it’s nice to see sweden picking an entry that isn’t generic pop again. 6.5/10

united kingdom - my only faint glimmer of national pride so far this year is that we managed to pick the only good song from the flaming garbage pile that was our nf. yeah, the lyrics are redundant and it’s a ballad by numbers, but michael gives it his all and it really pays off. 6.5/10

ireland - this will absolutely not do well but who cares, it’s fun and harmless. super chill and easy to listen, and i think sarah’s a big eurovision fan already which is nice. also i’d just like to take this opportunity to thank her for ditching the ylva and linda song she originally applied with. 6.5/10

iceland - hm. this is one where you need to listen a few times to get a full impression of what the fuck you’re hearing/seeing. i really did not like this when i first heard it alongside all the other söngvakeppnin songs (and most of them sucked lbr), but now i’m kind of ambivalent towards it. i still don’t like the screaming or the key change, but it’s something different and i can admire that. 6/10

slovenia - fine, but forgettable. she has a nice voice, but there’s a distinct lack of stage presence from the two of them and i fear that this might get lost in the semi final. 6/10

israel - i’m conflicted here. i definitely don’t think home is as bad as the fan polls and reviews imply, but it’s not great either. a verse or two in hebrew would have really elevated this and i’m a little baffled as to why the writers didn’t include even a little bit considering the contest is on home turf this year. still, kobi’s a very convincing performer and israel probably didn’t want to win again anyway. 6/10

poland - this is an odd one, which isn’t a bad thing at all in a year full of safe entries. not sure if using the bilingual version was the best shout, but it’s clearly still very polish and i’m glad to hear that they’ll be wearing the traditional clothing on stage in tel aviv. 6/10

czech republic - the chorus absolutely slaps, and if i was judging by music alone this’d probably be in my top ten. unfortunately, though, the rest of the song exists. the lyrics are truly abysmal, with some of the lines ending awkwardly and without proper rhymes where they’re needed, and the spoken-word section is genuinely unbearable. 5.5/10

austria - i honestly don’t know where to place this one. very underwhelming when it was first released, but now i feel like there’s potential here. most of austria’s recent entries have been very under the radar only to end up doing quite well. i’m not as optimistic about this as some of those, but only time will tell. 5.5/10

hungary - not a patch on his previous entry, but pleasant enough. he’s a good performer and unless the staging really sucks, he’ll do fine. 5.5/10

north macedonia - it’s a nice ballad? i guess? and, unlike a lot of their recent entrants, tamara is an established singer who we all know can sing live. there are also rumours that the delegation has been planning the performance for a while, so who knows, perhaps this’ll qualify. 5/10

georgia - this has been growing on me lately. the song itself is a bit of a bust, although the revamp helped, but oto really brings it to life on stage. even if you don’t understand what he’s saying, you can tell by the emotion in his voice that he really means it. 5/10

russia - the nightmare dream team hasn’t produced a good song in over a decade at this point, this included. kirkorov needs to quit fooling himself and let someone else have a go. 4.5/10

belgium - belgium’s had quite the glow up since 2014, but i fear they’ve gone for style over substance this year. wake up is very polished, but it doesn’t go anywhere and eliot’s live performances haven’t been convincing as of yet. 4/10

lithuania - i don’t know what was more shocking, him winning the selection or me finding out that he was lolita zero’s real voice in 2017. this isn’t awful, just very repetitive and strangely put together. 3.5/10

norway - sue me, i don’t like this. the bald guy feels out of place and out of tune, it sounds like it was written by a child, and oh my god it’s so unbearably cheap. 3/10 

estonia - eesti laul was such a let down this year. usually there’s a good mix of mainstream and alternative genres, but the new producer doesn’t seem to give a shit about variety, which is a real shame. anyway, victor’s performance is slick, but he can barely sing and the song itself is nothing to write home about. 3/10

romania - when this was first selected i didn’t mind it, probably because i just really didn’t want laura bretan to win, but as the season drags on i’ve really soured to it. it feels like it lasts for a minute longer than it actually does, and the whole ay-ay-ay part was not a good choice. 2.5/10

australia - as someone who was a big fan of estonia last year, this is honestly the furthest thing from that. it comes across as quite cheap (even without the questionable staging), and the chorus really grates on me. 2.5/10

belarus - i didn’t watch the entirety of the belarusian auditions for them to reject the potato monks in favour of lidl’s own brand zara larsson. 2/10

france - this is why delegations should be wary of selecting social media stars for their national selections. yes, they might get the viewing figures up a little, but they’ll probably win and the song will be Bad. i respect his message, but holy shit is this hamfisted as hell. 1/10

finland - if anyone was wondering how darude only ever had one hit two decades ago, here is your answer. 1/10

moldova - they really don’t want to qualify this year, huh. could’ve had ca adriano celentano, but nope. basic tune, painfully simple lyrics, but i guess her voice is nice enough 1/10

croatia - this... is awful. upsettingly so. at least jacques’ last entry had a novelty factor, but he’s doomed this poor kid to failure. 0.5/10

montenegro - i have absolutely nothing positive to say here. honest to god one of the worst songs i’ve ever heard, and no amount of clumsily shoehorned in folk instrumentation was ever going to save this. i can only pray that they’re spending their preparation time wisely and taking singing lessons, but considering that they probably blew half the budget on the music video, it’s unlikely. 0/10

as for potential winners,  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

a lot of the big fan favourites don’t have a winning vibe about them, so we might be in for a shock this year. please let it be albania or greece

also feel free to drop me an ask if you want to chat about last year’s entries since i kind of ditched tumblr for a year or two lmao

[imaginesfordayss]

BlacKkKlansman: I’ll never look at Adam Driver the same

This movie fucks. Hard. 

Honestly, Spike Lee didn’t have to go that hard. But he did with like zero remorse and me and the old black ladies next to me were yellin the whole damn time. The fucking symbolism??? The scenes at the end??? This movie took me to church and back and I am so thankful for it. 

Personally I felt that the casting of the love interest, Patrice, was a mistake. Not that I don’t love Laura Harrier to death, cause I do, but I felt she didn’t bring enough to the table for a character that was so conscious and so outspoken about what she was. I can’t put words to it but I just didn’t think she fit the character. Also Ryan Eggold looked way too nice to be a Klan leader. Like this guy is a monster and he was just too sweet looking. I can’t pity a racist. 

But everyone else I fucked with. I don’t even like Adam Driver but he owned this role. To the point where I can’t even really look at him the same. He has this one line where he’s shooting at Ron’s car and yells just the most racist, most rude slurs I’ve ever heard outside of Facebook and it was life changing. Deadass my mouth dropped I was like??? They let you say that on set??? And no one punched you in the mouth??? Bold. 

And Eric Foreman (Topher Grace) playing David Duke had me weak.

I also like what they did with the camera angles. They did scene replays which were interesting. And during the speech at the black student union, he was talking about black people loving themselves and loving their features, and throughout the scene they showcased black people in a portrait framed setting which was really beautiful. 

I feel like I could write a whole essay on the symbolism of two different approaches to racism and why the cops were portrayed as both heroes and villains and how Adam Driver’s character was so fucking important because the KKK hates Jews just as much as they hate black people but he didn’t feel like he should be included in their rhetoric cause to him, he wasn’t Jewish and there isn’t anything different about him from other white people yet the KKK still keep him on the same level as black people and he has the choice whether or not to be hated and yeah I gotta lot to say about that. 

Anyway! This movie earned a solid 8.5/10 and I cried at the end which was super unexpected and we really need to give this movie our support. Take your grandparents to see this movie with you! Fun conversations will ensue

[imadeletingmysocials]

My scores for E3, because apparently now i’m a dumb 4channer who thinks this /v/ meme shit matters, like it’s not gonna affect sales or anything it’s pointless as all hell [this is lenghy, but hear me out ok]

EA: 

4/10 - people will probably play the games regardless of how shitty this presentation was but... It felt pretty insulting. 

Battlefield V is probably gonna make a lot of money regardless cuz people like war games and it seems pretty well done, the more footage they have shown seemed better than their weird advertizement that made world war 2 seem very wacky, which honestly regardless if you’re a sexist neckbeard or not, seemed like a poor advertizement move. 

TinyBuild:

No one watched this lol and it was just 1 GAME and a fun cute musical that made people who aren’t strong enough to musicals die, 6/10 because it made nerds die and their song is catchy, i dont really care about their 1 game.

Microsoft:

 9/10 - I'm giving this much of a high score because I would play practically almost all of these games showcased (they’ll probably be available on PC which I’m biased for cuz I have a gaming PC), no kidding, I pretty much liked everything I saw and it was fairly straight to the point. Many gamers don’t appreciate the finer details of each game and think they’re generic but that’s just fanboys who haven’t played a single game outside of their favorites. 

Also my cousin uses those Xbox One netflix rip offs that gives you games so i’m happy for him. The presentation had a lot of diamonds in the rough games that will I will probably appreciate more over time (they might even become cult classics like Metro or Dying Light) than any of other games at other e3s. As for the stuff I won’t be playing: It’s mostly harmless so eh.

There was an abundance of trailers! It was like one after the other, pure goodness, it seems as if they left out all of the Sports games to EA to present and the only thing they showed that might not be anyone’s cup of tea was “Forza”, but honestly? I appreciate it, it seems like a good racing game even if I’m not one to buy racing games.... But the more you think about the number of good games presented, the less you’ll think about that, I mean they showed DEVIL MAY CRY 5!!! 

...The Funko Pop game made me scream though.

Bethesda: 

8.5/10  I cannot deny that these are games I will want to play regardless if they’re good or not. Sad to see nerds not enjoy the opportunity to meet ANDREW W.K. but I’m glad all of the divisions they own are making sequels to stuff I already like, so pretty much Bethesda played it safe.

Devolver Digital:

 8/10 It’s like that one b-movie film your college students made and you had a laugh with creating.

Square Enix: 

5/10 seriously, 30 minues of just trailers? Most of which we saw?? I guess it could be worse but who uses E3 screentime for mostly MMORPG deals! The new stuff was too vague to be excited about too.

Ubisoft: 

7/10 - I liked it when they made funny quirky things and their games are probably gonna be okay like usual, Ubisoft has dedicated fans that like their collectathon games they release every year, and it’s usually that one game you play when you’re bored and got nothing else, it’s okay. 

Gamers hate fun and dancing and all that stuff but I kind of find stuff like that exciting, while nerds who never went outside and who are sensitive as all hell to any representation of fun find it “cringey”. A panda dabbed, and that settles it, Ubisoft was the only E3 Brave enough to dab this year. 

PC Game Conference (it was fairly long):

I know none of you watch this one cuz y’all fake as hell but listen... Fuck you LOL, these are the type of games people actually play over 400 hours and really get people’s money. Like these are games built to last that might be on the best-selling Steam front page for MONTHS, like how Frostpunk was comfirmed last year during this conference, PC Gaming has been known for sleeper hits that nobody knows about (because the attention goes to cinematic experiences on consoles most of the time) but suddently everyone’s playing it. 

PC gaming has always been an alternative lifestyle and seeing as many people didn’t watch this one, that just proves the point that it still relatively alternative. Maybe it’s because everyone sounds dumb as fuck when saying “PC GAMER MASTER RACE” and acting like an elitist. 

The PC Gaming conference is always more of a talk show than a regular E3 which is why I respect it every year, fuck the hyperactive gamers that just wanna see flashy trailers, this one’s more SOPHISTICATED!! It feels a lot more human and less artificial. Either way, lot’s of what you might’ve expected: Simulators and Survival games you’ll probably spend 3 years playing until they make a better minecraft clone. 

Gamers like to act as if they’re tired of Battle Royale (already? It’s a new fad it still is here to stay for a little more) but the numbers and success of it doesn’t lie that it isn’t a fad that proves itself to be highly tempting to try out for developers. Go cry to valve that they didn’t release Half-Life 3 cuz you haven’t played any other FPS game without even researching that Valve pretty much fired all of it’s developers and you’re just being annoying.

I feel as if I need to comment what I saw at this e3 cuz nobody watched, they made a mod I liked from skyrim into a fully-ass game, they’re rebooting Star Control which not a single gamer today knows of, the HP Lovecraft open world detective game also seems very good. YAKUZA IS COMING TO PC!!!!!!!!! Killing Floor 2 stuff, Road Redemption stuff, SHARK RPG, cute indie games, Jeff Goldblum was there, Wall-E with a gun in VR which seems to have promissing good vr design by Insomiac games (yes the spyro people), 2 games about Taxi driving... Like sure I think it’s a good format for story telling but.

A cell-shaded art game, star citizen is still being made, and it’s gone to the point nobody really wants it anymore even if it’s... Still being made you know? So most guys are wrong that it was gonna be canceled. After that was the technical graphic card stuff which gamers don’t have enough capability to understand, stuff like 9k laptops that SELL a lot mind you. Rich people love that technical stuff. 

A space defense sim game, Don’t Starve Sequel, Just Cause 4 detailed explanation of the engine, Overkill’s The Walking Dead gameplay which has been in development hell for years now now has a release date, I discovered Clementine’s voice actor is white... Go figure, a literal pixelated roguelike (not what you think it is, it’s Noita), 

Theme Hospital REBOOT!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! And the doctors were cute. Probably one of the funniest games presented... Followed by REALM ROYALE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That harvest moon clone with a cute art style is still being made: Ooblets, no release date sadly. Anno is still going, cyanide and happiness still exists? and they’re making a battle royale? lol okay. How was Hitman 2 not announced during Square Enix?? Anyways it’s here at the end, the trailer was amazing and it’s coming out this year. 

I don’t have that much strong feelings because it’s just a normal conference and not a special one you know? But I’ll give it a 8/10 or 7/10 im not sure cuz I seem to like most games and I found Frankie cute.

Sony: 

Yo usually Sony makes like a huuuuuuuge thing about their conferences (like this year they didn’t even showcase indie games) but this year they started from a church for the sake of immersion?? It reminded me a little of their first E3s during the 90s, and it almost felt like a indie gathering for musicians, I swear to god, Sony is borderline experimental trying to balance out their E3 across stages. Jeb played the banjo and people just ACCEPTED it... AND THEN someone played some JAPANESE FLUTE? aRT. It might come off as a bit arrogant for some tho.

Nerds hated it and thought it was bizzare, which is why it means it’s good. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH BITCHES. Anyways could have been a little more fast-paced... But then again when it was fast-paced it was just like: Huh? What was that? I’m a big Resident Evil Fangirl, RE2 was my childhood but ignoring that for a sec: finally, Death Stranding gameplay, remins me of shadow of the colossus but post-apocalpytic, survival horrorish and abstract sci-fi.

 Kind of feels more Metal Gear than MGSV did already Cuz Norman Reedus sounds like snake a lot more than the 24 hours guy, and because from what I’ve seen in the footage, someone acts like Otacon to “Sam”. I think most now can figure out the plotpoints of this game with what has been established. I might be a bit sad at the fact that this will be a PS4 exclusive just like Metal Gear Solid 4, which I still haven’t played fully because it’s PS3 exclusive and I only have a gaming PC. 

Also this E3 was surprisingly entirely SINGLE PLAYER, I sorta don’t believe in the “single player doesn’t exist” myth honestly, especially now. I’m not sure if that makes Sony’s E3 better or worse, maybe it needed more variation, like I’ve commented, usually they have an indie showcase which this year did not. There were few games shown but for what it was worth, it’s still interesting... But yeah just 5 games? No Spyro? (easy picking), nothing extra? I can understand why many people felt this E3 was upsetting.

8/10.

Nintendo

Here it is, the most overhyped developer of all of E3, the source of “Nintendo wins E3 by doing nothing” memes because Nintendo fans really don’t care about anything except Nintendo and then act surprised when they only care about Nintendo when they try to be a little more open-minded (and fail) even if other E3s probably make more games built to last in comparisson, cuz we gay people only care about NINTENDO YOU KNOW? Shade asside... 

I was pleasantly surprised this E3, it wasn’t just a series of okay at best releases, a strong 9/10. 

tHAT WAS WHAT I WROTE IN PREPRATION....

BUT THEN???? IT WAS JUST THAT??? NO PRIME 4 NO ANYTHING LIKE JUST 3 GAMES BASICALLY? (maybe there was 5 games but eh) I mean smash is good.. It’s pretty much just an update of the last smash, every character is REALLY FUCKING GOOD BUT.... JUST THAT? jeez.. Like, the only stuff I wanted from it was Mario Party and Smash... Okay maybe that 1 Mecha game. Also I guess fornite is now on Switch but I can play that anywhere else really.

I guess a 7/10 is all I can give to just Smash, if there was a little more I’d give it a 9/10 for sure but... ehh Just Smash? jeez, fuck... i MEAN I kind of get it, Nintendo doesn’t do “e3″ normally, they usually do 1 big game at E3 and then wait a couple of months to do that little seasonal announcement thing they do across the year, ugh.. Okay. Yeah I guess i shouldn’t have expected much. Still isn’t it weird that Miyamoto was in Ubisoft’s E3 but not this one??? what!

Anyways

[raddishdweeb]

RBB unboxing and rating overal album!!

WWhew my RBB album came today! Ah it looks great, and I even pulled a Seulgi photocard. Yesss my bias wrecker, ah she looks great and her signature with the bear is precious!! 

Not going to lie, when I first heard “Really Bad Boy”, I thought I was in for a Bad Boy sequel but worse. Boy was I wrong, Really Bad Boy is an almost jazzy song. Honestly, its a pretty solid bop with a fresh concept. I don’t know why this era is so underrated, it’s a fun one. 

Anyway, time to review this album! I’m going to rate this album with TIPS, that is to say my in four categories and give it a grade (rating system will be below): 

-Title track: focuses on the concept and music video

-Innovation: focuses on the creativity of the album

-Photobook: includes the styling of the album and rates the pictures within its photobook. 

-Songs: focuses both on the overall song quality of the album and includes the title track and bsides. 

On to the review!!!

Title track: Fun song, fresh concept. I really enjoyed the Halloween concept on this one, hehe The Shining reference with Irene was great. Also, I think this was the era where Yeri got her confidence back. The amount of hate she gets is ridicoulus, but she glows in this comeback and I’m here for it. 7/10

+1 for Irene’s scream

Innovation: As I said before, Red Velvet went from a completely different sound than Bad Boy, and I really appreciated that. This was a really fun comeback, and something that definitely feels Red Velvet. 7.5/10.

Photobook:  I really enjoyed the photobook. Just look that the pictures!! Its well put together, and just pops with color!! This era actually had good styling if we’re excluding Wendy’s slightly odd green outfit and Seulgi’s slicked back hair (I know some people like, but I’m really not a fan). I especially love Yeri’s yellow highlights and every other outfit Wendy is wearing (her makeup is lovleyyyy). 8.5/10.

Songs: While the title track, is pretty solid, I gotta say this album has some of Red Velvet’s best bsides. So Good is amazing and Butterflies is in my top ten Red Velvet songs of all time. However, I am not too keen on Sassy as that thing we’re the members sort of groan (is that how one would describe it) after their lines really gets on my nerves. The chorus is lovely, but I have to skip a lot of the song because the groaning/sighing/moaning thing annoys me a lot. Other than Sassy, the other two songs, the English version of RBB and Tasty are pretty decent. Tasty is a little forgettable and ends a bit abruptly, but I wouldn’t skip it. The English version of RBB is also pretty good as english version go. For the rating of this album, I’d give RBB a 7/10, So Good and Butterflies a 9.5/10, Tasty 5/10, and Sassy 4/10. That averages out to about 7/10. 

Conclusion: When adding all the points up together, this albums gets a 30/40, which averages out to 7.5/10. RBB is a fun concept with great styling and two amazing bsides. 

Whew first kpop album review down!!!