#anyway i hope i could in some way clarify for you why i made that comment
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lezzian · 2 years ago
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Yeah it’s actually pretty brave to say ‘we should use animal products instead of relying on slave labor and mass carbon emissions to eat rabbit food’ on this site, especially for a POC. Do you know how many times a white vegan has gotten pissy because I told them to shut the fuck up and eat what’s there and called me a nigger in my DMs over it? I’ll give you a hint, it’s been more than one.
I am so sorry to hear you were treated that way. That is fucked up and bad and traumatising and it should never have happened. I understand that experiences like that will cause distrust and anger. I did not mean to single you out or anything. I just wanted to vaguely allude to the fact that I think it's strange to laud someone for saying that we should stick to the status quo, meaning, the consumption of animal products.
I had a whole thing written down here about how veganism works for me - how it's not overarching principle but rather a logical endpoint for my philosophical and political beliefs (which is really to just... respect the earth and all its creatures). But people more eloquent than me have written about the philosophy and standing principles behind veganism, like acti-veg on this site.
In the end it's just that I believe the preservation of a sentient life is more valuable than the goods or profit I could make if that life were ended. The production process behind animal products seems to me so unethical that I cannot buy them in good conscience. This should not be a difficult concept to grasp... Anyway, I find it extremely annoying how veganism as a philosophy is blamed for problems that are simply not caused by veganism, but rather by capitalism. Capitalism produces shit working conditions for all workers- including the workers who process animal products! Capitalism produces landfills full of leather and pleather products which will never be reused or recycled because production is completely divorced from demand/need. Capitalism produces deforestation in the amazon to make way for soy and corn based agriculture, which is then mostly exported to the west, where it's used to feed animals whose bodies will be turned into consumer goods. And capitalism wants to turn veganism into purely a consumer identity rather than a philosophical and political movement, which will divert attention away from capitalism's faults by directing your attention to a consumer identity that is offensive or made offensive to you.
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hannieehaee · 4 months ago
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HOT TO GO!
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18+ / mdi
summary: moving into a quiet apartment complex you expected to find nothing but solace, not your most entertaining situationship to date OR the three times you kept it casual with your new neighbor vs the one time he made things serious.
content: neighbor!jungkook, strangers2lovers, situationship (kind of), fwb, jk's a lil bit of a himbo in this fic, afab reader, smut, three smut scenes lol, penetrative sex, dry humping, oral (f and m receiving), fingering, etc.
wc: 7.1k
a/n: this is honestly just a silly and unserious fic that's mostly smut lol i hope u guys enjoy it<3
masterlist | patreon
"Oh, wow, uh, hey."
"Hi?", you looked at the stranger in curiosity, though still very shocked by the adonis of a man who had suddenly knocked on your door.
He cleared his throat and shook his head as if rebuffing himself to speak again, "Fuck, okay, that was such an uncool first impression. What I meant to say was 'Welcome to the neighborhood,' but you just caught me off guard. Sorry."
"I caught you off guard? You're the one who knocked on my door."
"Yeah, not gonna elaborate on that," he chuckled sheepishly, extending his hand, "Hi, I'm Jungkook, your neighbor," he introduced himself.
You chuckled in return, letting his ambiguity slide as you briefly shook his hand, providing him with your name, "Hi, Jungkook. I'm new here, if that wasn't obvious."
"No, yeah, you can really tell the difference between you and the old lady who used to live here. She was- wait, fuck. Did she-"
"No, Jungkook, she's not dead. The landlord told me she just moved into some retirement home," you clarified.
"Thank god," the boy sighed in relief, "Me and Mrs. Louis go way back. She used to bake me cookies on Sundays."
"Oh really? Well, you won't be getting any cookies from me. Sorry," you joked.
Cocking his head to the side, he lifted his eyebrows, "We'll see about that."
"What does that even mean?"
"I can be very convincing."
Was he flirting? Through a cookie euphemism?
"Are you-"
"Anyways, if you need any help with moving in, let me know. Maybe coming over to help build some furniture?", he suggested, "I like to be on a friendly standing with all my neighbors," he smiled as he disregarded his prior flirting, almost as if it had never happened.
"I'm your only neighbor. There's only two apartments per floor," you recalled, still amused by his oddity.
"Exactly," he winked, and with that, he turned to leave, heading back to his own apartment, "See you around."
It was through that very short interaction that you first met your neighbor, Jungkook. Despite how odd he had seemed, he carried a charm that intrigued you (though his pretty appearance also drew you in).
Closing your door, you went back to what you had been doing previously, a smile of disbelief on your face as you tried to come up with some believable reason to scout him for help – as he had offered – just to see him again.
Unfortunately, most of your stuff had not arrived yet, so you truly had nothing you could possibly use as an excuse to get him to come into your apartment so soon. It was nice, though, to know that your new neighbor was as friendly as he was (and as attractive, might you add).
~
"Hey, neighbor."
"Oh, hi, Jungkook. Did I forget to tell you my name last time?", you wondered why he'd omit your name, unless you had been too distracted last time staring at him to remember.
The next time you saw Jungkook was a day later at the apartment complex's laundry room located at the basement of the building. From what you'd seen the few times you'd walked by it on your way to the elevator, no one really seemed to use it. No one except Jungkook, apparently. You'd also come to find out that this apartment complex seemed to be occupied by mostly elderly people, with you and Jungkook being some of the few exceptions.
Eyeing you up and down in a not very discreet way, his eyes landed back on your face before responding, "No, just got distracted, sorry," he chuckled similarly to how he'd done last time.
This was the second time you'd seemingly caught him off guard, but you weren't complaining. The thought of your presence taking him out of focus gave you a slight boost in confidence, especially considering how attractive he was.
You eyed him curiously, noticing he had no laundry with him nor was he using either of the four washing machines located in the room. As soon as he came in, he took a seat on top of the washing machine next to the one you were currently putting your clothes into. When you smiled at him questioningly, he had no reaction, simply smiling back.
"What are you doing?", you asked whilst continuing your prior task, almost paying no mind to him.
"Just hanging out," he responded simply, swinging his feet back and forth as they hovered due to the stature of the washing machine he was currently sitting on.
"What, with me?"
"Yup. Just trying to be neighborly, is all. Shouldn't be down here all alone," he reasoned, "Can I help you? I love doing laundry."
You scoffed at that, "Really? You love doing laundry? Also, I don't need a bodyguard," you hadn't taken offense to his comment, but you'd found it somewhat amusing. He clearly just wanted to spend time with you, which admittedly made you feel slightly bashful. However, there was no harm in making him work for it a little more.
With a huff, he got off the washing machine and leaned down to help you organize your laundry, dividing it between colors, "I'm known as somewhat of a laundry fairy", he nodded seriously.
"Oh, so you do other people's laundry, then?"
"Yep," he nodded, "It's a whole profession. I part-time as bodyguard too," he joked, continuing to shuffle through your clothes.
"The perfect man," you retorted back, sarcasm in your tone.
"Exactly. You could make really good use of me," he winked, finishing up his pile of clothes and moving onto yours, beginning to place them inside the washing machine.
"Are you asking me to use you?", you braved it and flirted back, turning to look up at him.
The air in the room was comfortable, yet it now had a hint of something more. What it was, you weren't sure. Although Jungkook had hinted at being attracted to you when you first met a day prior, you'd never had a flirtation move so quickly. It usually took a bit more conversation before getting to the more suggestive comments, but the pleased look on his face as he looked down at you made you too excited to backtrack.
"I'm surprised it took you this long to get that. Was my self-invite to your apartment yesterday not hint enough?", he followed along, putting down the article of clothing he had in his hands to take a small step towards you, now leaving a very small distance between you.
"Oh? Was that what that was? I think I'm gonna need you to be a bit more specific. Spell it out for me, maybe?", you tilted your head to the side teasingly, almost as if daring him.
"Aw," he placed his hand on his chest, as if hurt, "That's my bad, pretty. I'll be a little more forward from now on, okay?", he coo'd, leaning down and letting his nose nudge against your own lightly.
"So, are you? Or are you all talk?", you dared him, tilting your face upwards, almost meeting his lips.
With a muted grumble, he closed the gap, pulling you towards him with a pull from your waist. Humming against your lips, he pressed you up against him, practically molding you to him as he allowed the kiss to become heated. The air in the room became even heavier somehow, causing you to mute any outside forces that could possibly take you away from a constant chorus of Jungkook playing in your head.
The kiss had no time for hesitance or shy meetings of lips as it instantly occupied the otherwise silent room with wet sounds of tongues intertwining and almost inaudible moans shared between lips. The harsh surface of the washing machine behind you almost felt like nothing as Jungkook's lips continued to distract you while his arms lifted you to sit on it. Legs opening, you welcomed him to stand between them, pulling him in my his shirt to ensure not even one second of distance between you was allowed.
Your head tilted back almost on its own accord as his lips trailed down your neck, humming into your skin after every kiss and occasional nibble of skin.
"J-Jungkook ... What if someone sees?", your common sense finally made an appearance, though you made no move to stop him.
"No one uses the laundry room here, it's fine. We have the place to ourselves," he breathed out between kisses, making his way back up to your lips.
With a scarily practiced finesse, his tongue snuck its way into your mouth, easing yours into copying his movements. Your resolve wore down quickly after that, following along with every touch of his on your skin. Despite not being one for casual hookups, it was impossible for you to deny the immediate chemistry you'd had with your neighbor. Who would casual sex with your neighbor going to hurt anyway?
His lips soon took your mind away from any further thought on the manner, trailing down your neck while his hands came up to wander under your tank top, tracing your skin with his calloused fingertips as goosebumps began to form. With soft hands and a rough tongue, Jungkook had your brain emptying at a worrying speed, now becoming a shell of yourself with nothing but Jungkook in mind. Just some kisses and some hand action already had you as putty under him, what a shame.
"Can I take this off?", he murmured against your lips, hands itching under your shirt as it rode up due to his movements.
"Mhm," you conceded, your own hands going under his shirt and feeling up the muscular skin of his back.
With your consent, his hands trailed their way back out from under your shirt, reaching down to help you out of it. Underneath was a tiny piece of fabric you could barely call a bralette, doing a terrible job of hiding the goosebumps on your skin or the hardness of your nipples. His tatted hand went up to toy with a clothed breast, murmuring praise against your cheek as he angled his head to look down at your chest. His eyes trailed to yours, finding them empty of any thought and far too wanting of more of his touch.
"How about this?" he practically whispered, one hand on your breast while the other went to toy at the strap of your bralette that had fallen from your shoulder to the meatier part of your arm, fingering at it softly, almost as if teasing whether or not he'd pull it all the way down or not.
"Yes," you almost whimpered, needing the skin-to-skin touch on your chest. Your back was already arched towards his chest, your body pleading him for more without any further words necessary.
He sighed once the job was done, your chest now fully naked for him and the rest of you almost equally as nude. It was only a tiny pair of shorts with some teeny tiny panties underneath that prevented him from your full nudity. In the meantime, he was still fully clothed. But somehow you didn't mind. His touch on your body was enough to keep you satiated. Surely you'd have your turn to enjoy his own nudity later on.
A groan left him upon hastily removing your shorts, now able to feel the heat coming from between your legs through the offensively thin panties you had on. Dragging you from your thighs, he placed you on the edge of the washing machine as he himself pulled down his pants just enough to leave him with boxers and some beaten up tank top. With a huff, he began intermittently connecting your crotches, bumping his hardness against your heat with a grumble. The art of dry humping might've been lost among many, but you were thanking any higher power that Jungkook was not one of the many to disengage with it.
"You're so warm already," he sighed, face pushing its way to your neck, nosing at your scent, "'n smell so fucking good ..."
Your nails dug to the skin of his shoulders, obsessed with the drag of his cock against you. He was hitting that sensitive, swollen spot that bad you wanting to give him a key to your apartment just so he could come over and do it over and over again.
"So fucking soft n pretty," he mumbled, "God, can't believe I got such a pretty little neighbor all to myself," he rambled on and on, "Gonna make you cum like this, okay, gorgeous? Promise I'll give you more next time, just- fuck ... just caught me off guard again's all ..." all his words were slurred, clearly marking the approximation of an early orgasm. What might've been a turn off for many others had your own high approaching just as fast. A hunk of a man such as Jungkook losing himself to mere dry humping? Sign you up!
"Me too," you almost whined, mouth open as you practically drooled at the feeling of that size and girth, excitement growing within you.
"Yeah? God, so fucking good n perfect," the praise was never ending, greatly aiding your impending orgasm.
With one last groan of your name, Jungkook's hips sped up, now dragging you more harshly into him in desperation for his orgasm. It was only a few moments into his own orgasm that you came too, too stimulated from his extensive play with your chest earlier on and simply too wound up to not find release with someone as attractive as he was.
In other circumstances you would've been embarrassed at how easily your body reacted to his own, but Jungkook seemed just as affected, still panting at the exertion his high had taken from him.
"Sorry," he chuckled breathlessly a few moments later, wide boba eyes staring at you with a shy smile, "I don't usually welcome people to the neighborhood by jumping them like that, hah, I hope I didn't overstep," he needlessly apologized as he helped you clean up with nearby towels and aided you in redressing you and himself.
Giggling at him couldn't be helped — he was far too cute. He was the perfect mixture of cuteness and hotness that it made you frustrated if you thought about it for too long.
"Jungkook, I promise you that was a very appreciated welcome," you laughed as you patted his shoulder reassuringly, stepping down from the washing machine.
"Great," he nodded with a smile, though still a but shy, "Let me help you with your laundry now, then? I won't jump you again, I promise."
"Maybe for next time, then?", you attempted to flirt, high fiving yourself internally when you pulled a shy chuckle out of him.
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Next time you saw Jungkook was back in your apartment.
Maybe you should've expected him to be on the other side of that door, specially considering you hadn't met anyone else since moving here, but you also hadn't expected him to be so continuously forward.
Within less than a week of being here, you'd met Jungkook, flirted with him, hooked up in the laundry room and proceeded to wash your clothes with his aid — as it turned out, he really was better than the average person at doing laundry. And now, you were curious as to what the next thing to come would be.
After a few knocks on your door, you resumed drying off your hair and walked over to the door, skin still damp and thin robe wrapped around you. Being almost nude, you decided to be smart and look through the peephole before admitting a stranger into your home. Looking through it, you found the one person you'd hoped to see every time you left the apartment; Jungkook.
Had it been anyone else, maybe you would've bothered to ask him for a few minutes in order to get dressed before attending to the door. However, seeing as Jungkook had already seen you almost fully nude, it seemed dumb to do so. That, plus the fact that you were pretty sure how today's visit would go.
"Hey," he said casually when the door was opened.
Donning yet another tank top, the contour of his muscles could be easily seen as he leaned against the frame of the door. A confident and suave smile was on his lips the moment his eyes did a once-over of your body, clearly taking notice of the singular layer of clothing you had on.
"Huh," he hummed, "You're making this too easy for me," he chuckled, letting himself in when you stepped aside to silently welcome him.
"Hello, Jungkook," you ignored him, closing the door behind him, "Are you here to help me unpack?", you questioned upon seeing him approach the few boxes located in your living room and eyeing their contents curiously.
"Yeah. Figured you were taking too long to invite me over, might as well invite myself," he said distractedly, focus all spent on a bunny figurine he found in your boxes, mumbling a quiet 'cute' to himself.
"Let me get dressed and then we can start," you said, beginning to walk to your room while he sat on the floor, beginning to open some boxed furniture you hadn't even bothered to eye since its arrival.
Already in the other room, you heard Jungkook call over before you could close your door, mentioning something about 'You'll end up undressed anyways, but okay,' causing you to chuckle to yourself.
It only took you a few minutes to moisturize and dress yourself in some comfortable loungewear, able to hear Jungkook's ruckus all the way from your room. Despite his slight awkwardness shining through sometimes, he seemed to be a very confident guy, so it made sense to you that he'd made himself at home almost immediately upon his arrival.
Heading back to your living room, you found him sat comfortably on the floor, boxed materials to build what appeared to be a bookshelf laid in front of him while he eyed a manual. Originally, he had implied that his intention to go visit you had been for another hookup, so it amused you that he had actually taken his own words literally and decided to help you out with your furniture.
As you took a seat next to him, you decided to voice out this thought to him, "Wow, you're actually going to help me unpack?" you asked amusedly, hands reaching out to copy the way in which he assembled some pieces together.
He shrugged, "It's the neighborly thing to do," he reasoned, "Plus, the sooner you're unpacked, the sooner we can do more fun stuff."
Despite it being said so casually, it was more than enough encouragement for you to put your mind to the task, knowing that the unexpected help of your hot neighbor was way better than the alternative of getting all your moving in duties done by yourself.
It took about two hours to get done with most of your unpacking, combined with putting together the few pieces of furniture you had bought and neglected to build. The last of it was found in your bedroom in the form of a few boxes of skincare and clothing you'd been too lazy to unbox, opting to instead use whatever you needed at the time and leaving the rest unpacked. Jungkook tutted at you disappointingly at this, lightheartedly scolding you for not simply organizing your stuff as soon as you moved in and revealing to you how organized he was himself.
"Is there any box you want me to stay away from?", he wondered as he rummaged through one of the various boxes you'd moved onto your bed to organize.
"Nope, what do you mean?", you wondered, pulling out a hair dryer and placing it in its rightful spot before walking back over to the bed.
"Well, for instance ..." he trailed off, pulling out a tiny piece of lace you'd forgotten was in the box labeled as 'clothes' Jungkook was currently going through. He gave you an awkward smirk, his mind seemingly battling between being smug at the thong in his hands and affected by the thought of you wearing such a garment.
Immediately, your eyes widened, a gasp trapped in your throat before you jumped at him to grab at the lace, only for him to pull it back with a laugh, now holding it above your reach. You continued to pull at him, letting out an annoyed 'Jungkook!' to express your annoyance, but still laughing at how childish he was behaving.
He let you take hold of the thong after a few more slaps to his hard chest, laughing at your frustration. To prevent your further attacks, he grabbed onto your wrists, deciding to hold you against him as you let go of the panties and paid mind to him instead. Far too casually, he leaned down and trapped you in a soft kiss, humming against your lips as his hands wrapped around your waist and your own went to his shoulders. You damned him in your mind, chastising yourself for how easily it was for you to become entranced by his touch.
"You knew what was in there, didn't you? Hmm? Seductress," he joked against your lips, though the tone of his voice didn't make you laugh, especially not when it was said in an airy whisper between open mouthed kisses.
"Shut up," you grumbled, pulling him closer, unwilling to let the kiss end.
With masterful expertise, Jungkook managed to lay you down on the space of the bed empty of boxes, hands going under your shirt to trace the soft skin of your back. His lips trailed down to your neck and reaching down to the space of your chest not covered by your tank top, grumbling against your skin.
"You smell so nice," he sighed, "So fucking soft too," he continued, not shy in feeling your skin and even breathing you in.
Tuned with you, he disconnected from you to eye you for permission to remove your shirt, dragging it away from your body after a nod of confirmation from you and proceeding to remove his own. Your hands imitated his own, also feeling up his toned body as you continued to kiss. Now leaning atop you, he ground his crotch against your own, groaning into your lips at the basic pleasure he received from it.
"How far do you wanna go?", he murmured as he ground into you, "I'll do whatever you want. I owe you, remember?", he continued, referring to your encounter at the laundry room where he promised to fuck you properly next time.
"Do whatever you want," you replied, looping your lips again, "Just- fuck, do anything," you practically pleaded.
Chuckling, he nodded, opting to lay you down properly, moving aside any boxes that were in the way so you could lay all the way back while he trailed his way down your body, tugging down the tiny shorts you'd opted for a few hours earlier. You sighed at the realization of what was to come, ashamed to admit you'd been wondering how that piercing would feel between your legs.
"So soft here too," he mumbled, kissing up your thighs distractedly, making his way up to that area between your legs that was calling his name, "Fuck, 'n smell so good," his nose practically pressed up against the very thin layer of cloth separating him from your cunt, shamelessly breathing you in as he dragged his nose to press into your clit before pulling away.
A mute whine was pulled out of you, making your thighs attempt to close without much thought, only to make his arms wrap around your legs and pull them in opposite directions in order to separate them. He took a quick moment to pull your underwear down your legs, immediately going back to wrap around your legs to keep a wide enough space for him to enjoy you.
He began tentatively, almost as if testing out how he would go about having you. It only took some encouraging mewls from you for him to really put his heart into it, diving in as his tongue delved into your cunt, moaning against you. He hummed and groaned into your cunt, especially so whenever your hands would pull at his overgrown mullet, pulling him even closer to you. Taking advantage of his large nose, he nosed at your clit while his tongue played with your cunt. Your mewls and the scratching against his scalp should've been more than enough indicator that he had you at the palm of his hand.
"Baby," he moaned against you, refusing to create any distance between you, "you taste so good, fuck," he cried out, as if he were the receiver of the pleasure. But then again, maybe he was — or at least that's the gist you got from the commotion happening under you as the bed bumped with every movement of Jungkook's hips humping against it.
"K-kook, fuck, right the- oh, fuck ... right there!", you cried when his fingers joined in on the equation, tongue focused on your clit while his fingers curled inside you to perfection.
It was embarrassing how soon you felt your orgasm approaching, but you didn't blame yourself, not when a 10 was on his knees, whimpering against your cunt and letting endless muffled praise leave his lips while his tongue refused to let out. You lost control of yourself at some point, unashamed in the way you pushed his face against you, closing your thighs around his head and ground into his face. This only caused a high pitched whine to leave Jungkook, following your silent instruction for more and giving in to you twice as hard.
"Cum, baby. Wanna taste, fuck, please," he pleaded, looking up at you for a quick moment, making your brain leave you entirely at the pretty eyes he was making up at you, practically begging for your orgasm to come.
If you were boneless and defeated before, you were more so now, losing yourself to your orgasm as the pretty boy continued to lick and suck at your release, humming as if he had just been provided the most satiating meal. The humping of his hips never stopped either, only accelerating upon your high and only halting when you'd gone down from it, insisting on pulling him up the bed to claim his lips, wanting to enjoy them while the arousal was still fresh on him.
"God, fuck, you're nasty," he chuckled breathlessly when your tongue quite literally attacked his mouth, insistent on tasting yourself on his lips. This was clearly not a complaint, but more like a happy realization, as Jungkook practically reached down your throat as he tongued at your mouth, providing you with your own taste and moaning endlessly as he did so.
"Did you cum?", you asked between kisses, eyebrows pinched with worry that you wouldn't get to play with him this time around either.
He chuckled, a bit embarrassed, "No, pretty. Almost, though. I can just finish myself off if you're tired or-"
"No!" you interrupted, not shy in reaching down to his still clothed cock, feeling the length through his clothed ad he shuddered, "Let me suck you off? Fair trade, right?", you suggested, wanting nothing more than that size inside you one way or another.
"Oh, you sure? I don't want to force you or anything-"
You interrupted again, gesturing at him to flip you over so he could be under you this time around, "No, Kook. Please? I really want it. Can I have it?", you decided to be a bit mean, playing up the begging under the assumption that a guy like Jungkook would probably enjoy it.
You were right.
"O-oh, okay, beautiful," he rasped, hands in a frenzy to undo his sweats so he could give you access to his dick, "Just, fuck, give me a second. I don't wanna cum right away," he blushed, giving you a sweet peck before leading you to your knees while he sat at the edge of the bed.
With an excited giggle, your hands joined his own to help him lower his pants and boxers just enough to give you access to his length — the same one that had dragged against you until completion just a few days prior. His groan at your touch was immediate, body physically shuddering when you wrapped your hand around it and eyed it with hunger. His hands laid on his thighs, fingers itching as he attempted to hold his reactions back.
"Can I?", you asked, leaning closer to it as your hand remained wrapped around it.
"Yes, just, fuck, don't laugh when I cum too soon," he warned with a whine.
Another giggle left you before finally lowering your head down to his own head, lips wrapping around it and suctioning meanly. With a hum, your tongue lightly licked at the tip, earning a mixture of a groan and a sigh from the man north of you. Your hand remained wrapped around his length, twisting while you tortured the tip with your mouth. To ensure you could really drive him crazy, your other hand joined in, playing at his balls and earning yet another sound of supplication from him.
"G-god, fuck, wait- Don't- Fuck, more, baby, please," he begged, hand shyly going to the back of your head to lightly encourage you to engulf him in your mouth.
"Want my mouth?", you asked as you let go of him, though still lightly licking at the sides of his dick, unwilling to stop teasing for as long as you could help it.
"C'mon, baby. I gave you my mouth, just- Oh, fuck, yes," he sighed when you decided to practically down the majority of his dick, enveloping as much as you could while using your hand to jerk off the small percentage of it that couldn't fit into your mouth.
You decided to show off as much as you could, taking him far enough to gag and pushing through it for as long as possible. The whines and whimpers coming from the man above you were more than enough reward for your efforts.
"F-fuck, you don't have to g-gag, baby, shit, don't force yourself," he panted out, barely able to get those words out without effort. This only encouraged you further, puffing out air from your nose in order to obtain as much oxygen as possible. You knew he wad almost at his end, so you used every asset available to you to break him. You took breaks to breathe every so often, but other than that, you were practically a machine attached to his cock.
"Okay, shit, fuck," he stammered out curses, "Gonna cum, pretty, w-where? In your mouth? Please? Fuck, let me cum in your mouth," he rambled while his hands made a mess of your hair as he attempted to keep it away from your face. His hips also began a slow and shy grind against your face — a barely visible movement but still completely present. It represented his lack of control as you blew his mind away, something which went straight to your core.
You nodded, humming against his dick knowing it'd cause a vibration that'd have him keening for his orgasm. And right you were, as his hands shamelessly pushed your head into his cock without a second thought, clearly too overcome with the pleasure of his orgasm to worry about gagging you with his cum. You, however, took it like a champ, reasoning that within some seconds you'd get to breathe properly again.
"G-god, baby, just like that ... C-cumming, shit" he cried, hips still pushing into your mouth. You wished you could see how his whiny demeanor manifested onto his face — those gorgeous features must've looked breathtaking when pleasure was all he felt.
Finally, you gasped out for air after having swallowed as much as you could manage, with some of it dripping past your lips. Jungkook let himself lay back on the bed to catch his breath while you remained on your knees catching yours.
This lasted very little when Jungkook suddenly decided to use his brute strength to drag you up on the bed, sitting your still wet middle on his flaccid self, pulling you in for yet another tongue-filled kiss. He hummed and moaned and whined as he licked every remnant of his essence from your mouth, causing a similar reaction from you.
After the fact, you shuffled yourself off him and made space on the bed to huddle up to his side, which he welcomed by cocooning you under his arm and pulling you flush against him. It was comfortable and silent for a few moments as you continued catching your breaths and letting the sweat on your bodies transpire — you also made a mental note to invite him to take a shower (with you, maybe).
"You moving in next door was not on my bingo card, but thank fucking god for that," he chuckled after a few moments of silence.
"Yeah? You didn't stalk your previous neighbors for a hookup?", you joked, receiving a devious squeeze of his strong arm in retaliation.
"Shut up," he tutted, "You like that I'm like a dog following you around."
Fair enough.
Silence then took over again, up until the two of you were rested enough and decided to get back to the task at hand — putting furniture together and unpacking anything that was left boxed (though you decided to leave any boxes that may contain panties away from his reach).
It was easy for you to fall into fun conversation with Jungkook, which only led to him staying over for far longer than anticipated, taking up your day and even ordering takeout for you to eat after getting all the grunt work out of the way. A shower was had, though you mutually agreed for no funny business (other than a good ten minutes of making out under the water, but that didn't count in your eyes). Since he lived right next door, he managed to extend his visit up until the last minute, entertaining you more than anything had in the past week of moving in.
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One month into your new place and you decided the move was probably one of the best decisions you'd ever made. You'd come to find that Jungkook's old neighbor was not the only old lady living in the building, but that the neighborhood was mostly made up of old people (which, granted, Jungkook had warned you of in passing). That gave to a slightly boring home life, but you liked it better this way. Jungkook being your sole young neighbor was more than enough, specially with how often he went out of his way to seek you out.
After those first two hookups, no time for anything else was really had. This made you embarrassingly needy. The anticipation for finally having actual sex with Jungkook was too much too handle, specially when he'd still occasionally bump into you and catch you off guard with a kiss (which usually led to a make-out far too filthy for the public setting). You'd started your new job a week after moving and Jungkook was occupied by some reason or another, meaning that you'd only really see each other in passing. Although you'd text and keep up with each other, the frustration continued to build up.
The third time you were really able to get Jungkook alone was a little over a month after moving in.
You weren't particularly proud of how it is that you got him back in your apartment, but in your defense, you were ovulating that night and feeling particularly needy. Knowing that Jungkook was a bit of an unserious man, you knew that some pull from you and he'd put everything aside to come crawling. The thought itself made you feel powerful.
With a single 'accidental' text (maybe it was a lewd image, you'll never tell), you began to hear obnoxious knocking on your front door — within seconds of delivery, might you add. Excitedly, you walked over to the door, opening it to find a breathless Jungkook holding up his phone with your conversation pulled up, the incriminating picture taking up his screen.
"You're so mean to me," he managed to say before you pulled him in with a kiss, kicking the door behind you and turning around so he could press you up against the now closed door.
"Mean? I didn't do anything," you feigned between kisses, already lightheaded.
"I've been wanting to come over," he sighed into your lips, trailing down to your neck to catch his breath, "Just been so busy, fuck. If you wanted me so bad, you could've just come visit. I'd drop anything to have you," he continued, unable to unglue his lips from your skin. His hands mirrored his sentiment, grabbing at every curve with a desperation you hadn't seen from him before.
"I thought you were the one that was supposed to be chasing after me?", you joked with a breathless chuckle.
"Sometimes I need a little encouragement, baby. Need to know I'm not just bugging you," he replied as he undressed you almost as if it were second nature to him.
Walking you back into what he knew to be your room, he laid you down, now donning nothing but your panties. He soon after matched your nudity, stripping of his muscle tee and sweats, making his way on top of you as he'd done last time.
"Will you be mad if I fuck you?", he rasped, one hand at your boobs and another rubbing at your cunt through the thin layer covering it.
"You're an idiot," you deadpanned, "I'll be mad if you don't."
Needing no further confirmation, his hand slipped past your panties, rubbing circles on the puffiness of your clit while continuing to kiss you. This didn't last for long, simply being used as an aid to lubricate you with your own wetness as his fingers reached a little souther to smear your slick around while his thumb continued to play with the swollen bud.
Already unclothed, Jungkook took his hand away from you, resulting in a whine from your lips to his and moving his hand onto his own arousal. Jerking himself a few times, he stopped kissing you in favor of leaning back to look down at you while twisting his fist on his dick. After quickly fishing for a condom from his discarded pants, he went back to his previous position, rolling it in while you nagged at him to hurry.
Before actually entering you, of course he had to piss you off one last time by teasing your clit with the tip of his cock, groaning when he felt you flutter beneath him. One kick from you was enough for him to chuckle and finally enter you, groaning in unison with you at the feeling.
"Jesus Christ," you groaned when you felt him begin bottoming out, inch by inch filling you up enough to cause an unknown level of pleasurable pain. You hadn't stopped to think what that size would feel like inside you — or at least as much as he was able to get in.
Above you, Jungkook looked tortured, still and with a wincing look on his face as he waited for the green light to begin moving in and out of you. It took you a few moments longer, nimble fingers digging into the muscles of his arms before you finally nodded at him to move.
"Fuck," he groaned upon finally beginning to pick up a pace, biting his lip and his eyes almost rolled back.
"More," you urged, falling in love with the feeling of him immediately.
Your eyes were crossed, your fingers digging far too painfully into his skin, your legs wrapped around him like a vice, everything was far too intense far too quickly. He obeyed your plea immediately, making matters worse for you, having already been blowing your mind prior but now simply melting it.
"How do you feel this good?", he grunted. His arms reached your thighs, pulling you up a bit to hammer into you at a better angle, "Should've fucked you since that first day, shit. How'd I get such a pretty- fuck, such a pretty girl delivered right to my door?", he went on, sweat building on his skin.
The slapping of skin sped up with the proximity of Jungkook's orgasm, just as yours followed along. His hands were restless, attempting to hold you up while also thirsty to feel every possible inch of your body.
"Please tell me you're close, or else this is going to be really embarrassing for me," he muttered onto your skin.
With a chuckle, you confirmed your incoming high, whining when he finally let himself go and sped up in order to reach his own orgasm, now more relaxed knowing you were right with him.
He let out some uncharacteristically high moans as he filled up the condom, groaning and stilling once he was finally done. You joined him mere seconds later, arching your back and pressing your chest against his own as bliss encompassed you. Despite the sticky sweat covering you both, Jungkook let himself fall against you, pulling out and placing the condom aside momentarily so he could lay beside you while you caught your breath.
In the almost silent room, Jungkook nuzzled against you and kissed the sweaty skin he could reach, hands playing with your hair as he pressed you up against him.
"Would it be bad if I asked you out? Or should I have done that before seducing you in the laundry room?", he wondered out loud, leaving love bites on your neck.
You laughed at how random he could be, appreciating how he spoke his thoughts aloud most of the time, "You can ask me out, I won't bite. Unlike some people," you muttered the last part, giggling when he gave you a slightly harsher bite.
"You like it, don't lie," he muttered, suddenly getting up and dragging you with him despite your whine in negation, "C'mon, we're going to take a shower, have a quickie, and then I'm taking you out for some boba," he decided, using his inhuman strength to pull you up and drag you to your restroom.
"But-"
"C'mon, I've been wanting to ask you out since you moved in, I'm already late," he hushed you, carrying your basically limp body to the restroom with the promise of a fun night, something you did not have it in you (nor did you want to) deny.
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to read short 1.6k word continuation (+ all other previously written bonus content) you can go join my jk monthly tier on patreon!
content: smut, afab reader, oral (f receiving), etc.
wc: 433 (teaser); 1619 (full drabble)
sneak peak:
"Are you ever going back to your apartment?", you murmured, though it was likely muffled by the large body wrapped around you.
"What, already tired of me?", asked Jungkook as he continued to nose at your skin, a habit you realized he had soon after making things official. He had a sensitive nose, he'd said once, always enjoying the cosmetic products that gave you that floral scent he adored.
After a month of officially dating, Jungkook had become the human manifestation of a leech. It was rare for him to leave tour side whenever you so happened to have free time and would take advantage of the proximity between your apartments.
Being frank, this was something you loved about him. Still in the honeymoon phase, there was nothing better than getting to see your boyfriend at any given time, especially when he was the one seeking you out. He made you feel wanted and like you were a necessity for him, almost as if he had an addiction to you.
That being said, the man just would not leave your apartment.
Now, this wasn't too much of a bother thus far. You liked it, in fact (at least for the most part). He was quite clean while also being laid back, which was a great combination to have in a person who was practically taking on the role of your roommate.
He did, however, prove to become a distraction when it came to your day to day life. You allowed yourself to indulge in his company too much, leading to a huge drop in your productivity.
But what could you do? He was addictive.
"You love having me around, don't lie to yourself," he continued, "What, tired of waking up to head?", he joked, hands making their way under your shirt to cheekily trace your skin.
"Waking up to head?," you asked incredulously, "You woke me up by tickling me, you menace."
He chuckled, adjusting himself on the bed so he could climb on top of you, knees settled on each side of you and hands slowly bringing your top up.
"Okay, fine. Maybe I've been a bad guest. Let me make it up to you?", he grinned, snaking his way down your body until his head was leveled with your stomach, kissing the skin he'd freed just moments prior.
"Better make it worth my while or else I'll start charging you rent for every hour you spend in here."
"I'll move in. Don't threaten me with a good time," he joked, knowing most of his time was spent here with you regardless.
...
find the 18+ continuation on patreon!
if you have trouble finding it on there, just let me know!!<3
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kaleldobrev · 1 year ago
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Possessive
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Pairing: Soldier Boy (Ben) x F. Reader
Summary: Ben is highly against when other men hit on you
Original Prompt: Requested by anonymous | HEYYY THERE. First of all- I love your work so freaking much. Second of all- if you’re still accepting requests I was wondering if I could ask for a soldier boy x reader where they’re out at a bar and some creepy guys hits on her?? Basically how Ben would react and everything. THANK YOU SO MUCH LOVE <333
Word Count: 2.3k
Warnings: Cursing (21x) & Possessive!Ben
Authors Note: I re-wrote this I think like a handful of times cause I honestly wasn’t happy with it. But now I am finally happy with it | I really hope you guys liked the way this turned out | If you liked this, don’t forget to like & reblog. I really appreciate it! Feedback is always welcome ♡
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“So tell me why you fucking dragged me here again?” Ben asked, walking very close behind you that he might as well be attached to your back.
“Hughie’s birthday,” you reminded him.
“Remind me again why he invited me?” Ben asked. “Because we aren’t really buddy-buddy babe.”
“Because believe it or not, he doesn’t hate you,” you said. “Besides, even if he didn’t invite you, I would have dragged you here anyway cause he said I could bring a plus one. And you my guy, are my plus one.”
He rolled his eyes. “I seriously do not want to fucking be here. I have other things I could be doing than hanging out with your friends.”
You turned to him, cocking a brow. “Like what? Smashing bennies on our kitchen counter while you watch re-runs of M*A*S*H?”
He furrowed his brow, hating that you knew him all too well. “Fuck you,” was how he chose to respond.
“Fuck you too,” you smirked. “Now let’s go grandpa,” you said, taking his hand in yours and making your way to the back table where your friends probably already were.
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“Y/N!” Hughie exclaimed, holding a beer in his hand. “You made it!”
“Of course I did,” you smiled; him and you exchanging hug. “I wouldn’t miss actually seeing Butcher let loose,” you winked.
“You’ve seen it plenty of times luv,” he said, picking up a shot of vodka.
“Yeah but, that was when strictly murder was involved,” you clarified. He shrugged his shoulders in response, knocking back the shot.
“Hey. I’m shocked you actually came,” Hughie said, gesturing toward Ben.
“She dr—” he started to say, but changed his mind when he saw you, looking at him with the biggest ‘do not piss me off’ look. “Wouldn’t have missed it.”
“So, what’s everyone drinking?” You asked.
“White claw as usual for me. But we have beer and vodka shots too,” Annie replied, gesturing around the table as your eyes followed the drinks.
“Anyone in the mood for some rum?” You asked. “Kinda in the mood for a rum and coke myself.”
“You’re always in the mood for rum and coke,” Ben mumbled. “Rum and my coc—” He mumbled again, but you quickly cut him off, not wanting him to finish his sentence.
“Okay!” You clapped. “I’m gonna go get some rum and coke. Ben, you wanna come with me?” You asked, turning in his direction.
Ben weighed his options: he could either sit at this table making small talk with your friends that he had nothing in common with, or he could go with you to the bar and maybe have the chance to convince you to have a quickie in the bathroom. “I’ll come with you.”
“Perfect!” You clapped again, aggressively taking his hand as the two of you started making your way toward the bar.
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As soon as you and Ben were out of ear and eyeshot, Annie was the first one to break the silence. “So, what’s going on with them? Because whenever I bring up their relationship she always changes the subject.”
“They aren’t in a relationship,” Butcher clarified. “Not a real one anyway.”
“I mean, friends with benefits is kind of a relationship,” Annie said. “I mean, it’s not like the two of them don’t have feelings for each other ya know?”
“How do you figure?” Butcher asked.
“You don’t see the way the two of them look at each other? Those are more than ‘I only fuck you cause you’re convenient eyes’,” she explained.
“He doesn’t love her. Dont think the cunt is even capable of love,” Butcher replied, taking another shot of vodka.
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“Did you actually want rum and coke or did you just want us to have some alone time?” He smirked. “Come and cock if you will.”
“Why does everything that comes out of your mouth sound disgusting?” You asked, not nearly as disgusted as you were over a year ago when you had first met him. Because you had been around him for as long as you have, you had basically become desensitized to basically everything he had said or did. Him walking around naked? Just an average Tuesday. Him snorting coke while you make pasta? Just an average Friday.
“I thought you liked the things that came out of my mouth,” he winked.
“We are not doing this right now,” you warned him.
“I mean we could. Your heart is beatin’ rather fast right now. And your cheeks are turning that pinkish color they usually get whenever you wanna jump me,” he smirked.
“Either go and sit down or stay quiet. Cause I don’t need these random people in this bar to know about our sex life,” you whispered yelled.
“Where’s your sense of adventure Sweetheart?” He smirked again, starting to tug on your empty belt loop on your jeans.
“Ben,” you whispered through gritted teeth.
“What?” He asked, whispering in your ear. “It’s not like anyone’s paying attention to us. This bar is fucking crowded.” He pulled you close, and kissed your neck; which caused you to let you a tiny moan. “There she is,” he smirked against your skin.
“Okay. I need you to go sit down,” you said, Ben still very much kissing your neck.
“You really want me to go and do that when we can go into the bathroom and have a good and quick fuck?” He whispered.
His offer was tempting, more tempting than you would have liked to admit. But you had to restrain yourself, at least right now — because you didn’t want to get fucked in a dirty bar bathroom. “Ben,” your voice stern.
He knew that voice all too well, and he immediately stopped what he was doing. “Fine,” his voice annoyed. “Gonna go sit by your friends.”
“Ben, you can still stand here. Just keep your hands to yourself,” you told him, but he was already half way across the room. “Fucking child,” you whispered, full well knowing that he would still be able to hear you.
“Pain in my fucking ass,” he mumbled to himself.
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“They’re been over there a long time,” Hughie said, trying to see over the sea of people. “Oh wait! Here they come.” But instead of you and Ben coming back toward the table, it was just Ben; and everyone looked at him with slight confusion. “Where’s Y/N?”
“Getting her rum and coke. Weren’t you paying attention?” Ben slightly snapped.
“Jesus,” Hughie mumbled.
“I think what he means is, I thought you were getting one with her,” Annie said.
“Trouble in paradise?” Butcher asked slightly smirking; holding up a shot of vodka for Ben to take. Ben just rolled his eyes and took the shot. “That’s what I thought.”
“Can someone fucking move so I can sit the fuck down?” Ben asked, his voice full of annoyance.
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As you waited at the bar for yours and Ben’s drinks, you tapped your fingers along to the music that was playing even though it was very muffled sounding due to the immense crowd in the bar tonight. “Hey little lady,” you heard a male voice say, but you ignored it, thinking that he was probably talking to the girl next to you. But then you felt an aggressive tapping on your shoulders. For a split second you thought that maybe it was Ben, but you knew he would never do something like that to you.
When you turned around, a man about a few inches taller than you stood in front of you. “You talking to me?” You asked.
He scoffed. “Yeah, who else would I be talking to pretty lady?” His words made you shudder. “Cold?”
“Uh yeah…I uh…I run a little cold,” you lied. Fuck, he noticed the shuddering, you thought.
“You can borrow my jacket,” he said, starting to take off a leather jacket that reeked of menthol and cheap whiskey.
“No I’m good, thanks though,” you said, trying your best to be nice. “Besides, I’d never see you again, so you would never get your jacket back.”
“See, I fully intend on seeing you Sweetheart,” he said. “In more ways than one,” he winked. Again, you felt your body shudder. “Are you sure you don’t want my jacket? It’s honestly really fucking hot. Kinda like you.”
Oh sweet baby Jesus, you thought. “I’m good honestly. And plus, I’m sure my friends have a jacket I can borrow.”
“Your friends uh?” He cocked a brow. “They as hot as you?” You honestly didn’t know how to answer that, so you just stood there a little dumbfounded. “I’ll tell you what, I’ll give you my number and we can meet up later for a little party.”
“I don’t thin—” you started to answer.
“And before you say no. I’m sure you would love it, it’s a sex party. Like uh, that Herogasm. Ever been to Herogasm?” He asked.
Of course you’ve been to Herogasm; but it wasn’t for pleasure on any account (as that kind of thing wasn’t remotely your thing). You were strictly there to make sure things didn’t go more south than they already did. “That’s not really my —”
“I really think you’d enjoy it,” he said. “The guy who created it must of been such a freak.” You have no idea, you wanted to say.
“Soldier Boy,” you said, and the man looked at you with slight confusion, furrowing his brow. “Created it…Hero…gasm…”
“Oh shit he did! Man, that guy is a fucking legend,” the man said. “Hey, you think he would still be going to those if he didn’t get killed in that nuclear thing in Ohio back in the eighties?”
“I honestly wouldn’t know,” you said, starting to actually get embarrassed.
“Anyway, enough about that guy. Have you ever had a threesome?” He asked, abruptly changing the subject.
“Hey Sugar,” you heard Ben say from behind you.
“Get in line pal,” the guy said. “She’s with me.”
Ben raised a brow out of amusement. “Oh she is, is she?”
“Yeah and—hey, has anyone ever told you that you kinda look like Soldier Boy? Man, he was my favorite,” the man said. If Ben’s ego couldn’t get any higher…
“He gets that a lot,” you chimed in.
“Shit, you two know each other?” The man said, looking back and forth between you and Ben.
“Yeah,” Ben said. “We’re real familiar with each other. So why don’t you scam before I break your nose for hitting on my girlfriend here?”
The man couldn’t help himself but scoff. “Girlfriend? Dude, you wish.” Oh no.
“Excuse me?” Ben asked. “I don’t think I heard you quite right.”
“Of course you didn’t, cause you’re an old, fucking —”
Ben’s hands went into fists, and you felt him start to push past you, but you stopped him by pressing a firm hand on his chest, which was starting to get unbelievably hot. “Let’s go sit down. Annie just texted me asking me where we are.”
The drinks that the bartender made you and Ben got slid toward you, and you picked them up, attempting to hand a glass for him to hold to replace one of his fists. “Don’t wanna worry her now would we?” Ben said, his voice still full of anger, but it was attempting to sound calm.
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“You’re pissed at me aren’t you?” Ben asked, as the two of you started making your way toward the table.
“Why do you think I’m pissed at you?” You questioned.
“Because I didn’t let you handle that yourself,” he answered. “I know you’re all about feminism or whatever, but I didn’t like the way he was talking to you.”
“I admit what you did was slightly more alpha than I would have liked but, I’m not remotely pissed at you,” you told him. “It was kinda…hot actually,” you confessed. “I’m just more intrigued by the choice of words you used.”
“What words?” He raised a brow, the two of you stopping in your tracks mere feet away from the table.
“The fact that you called me your girlfriend,” you said. “You could have just said friend, but you choose to use the word girlfriend.”
“Jesus Christ,” he rolled his eyes. “We are not having this conversation now.”
“But you can grope me in a crowded bar?” You asked, cocking your head.
“That’s different,” he said.
“H-okay, I’m not gonna touch that. But seriously? I think we should really talk about this at some point because you’ve been doing that a lot lately,” you said.
“Doing what?” It was his turn to cock his head, and look at you with slight confusion.
“Calling me your girlfriend,” you stated.
He rolled his eyes again. “Tell me one time before this time that I called you my girlfriend.”
“Literally yesterday,” you responded all too quickly.
“Because some creep was hitting on you. To be fair, you call me your boyfriend,” he said, trying to turn this conversation in his favor somehow.
“I have never once called you my boyfriend,” you stated.
“You did. Yesterday when you were on the phone with your mom,” he told you.
“A conversation that I told you not to listen in on might I add,” you retorted.
“Okay, that’s besides the point. Point is —”
“Look, I’m gonna make this simple. Do you want me to be your actual girlfriend or not?” You asked bluntly, cutting him off.
“What?” He asked, for some reason acting like he was confused.
"I'm tired of beating around the bush okay? We like fucking, we already live together, and we genuinely like spending time with each other. So, why not just make things official?" Ben knew that you had a point. "So, do you want to be my boyfriend or not?"
"Yes," he replied, sounding slightly annoyed.
"What?" You asked, sighing.
"I wanted to be the one to ask," he mumbled.
"Fucking Christ," you mumbled.
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castiwls · 2 months ago
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coach .ᐟ
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Paring; patrick x reader
Synopsis; your sons tennis coach is the bain of your life. You hated Patrick zweig - that only made you that much more attractive to him.
Requested;
Notes; i feel like i cant write him properly still :( something feels off
Masterlist | coach!au masterlist
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“Can Patrick come?” 
Your son’s voice cut through the quietness of the car, his head peeking up from the switch in his lap. He sent you his best puppy dog eyes as you met his gaze through the rearview mirror for a moment.
“You want Patrick to come?” You clarified as you raised an eyebrow. He nodded enthusiastically before looking back down to his game. “Mhm.” A long-suffering sigh left your lips as you focused back on the road.
Great.
Of all the people your son could grow an attachment to he’d just had to pick one of the most insufferable guys you’d ever met. It had taken you all of five minutes to decide that you were far from keen on the tennis coach your ex had found for your son. 
“I don’t know…” You sighed hoping your son would simply drop the topic. Why did he want his tennis coach to come to dinner anyway? That surely had to be breaking some sort of code, either that or it would just simply cause more drama amongst the other parents at the club.
They already believed your son got special treatment. One mum had once claimed that the two of you must be hooking up at least if the way he looked at you was anything to go by. Sure you’d noticed his less-than-subtle glances as he checked you out - his grin only growing at the scowl he’d get back - but you were not sleeping with him.
“Please.” He pleaded looking back up. “I’ll do the dishes and clean my room?”
The car came to a stop outside the courts. “You do that and you hoover for a week.” You turned in your chair shooting him a look as he nodded. “I mean it.”
“I will. I will.” He nodded so fast you thought he was going to make himself sick for a moment.
Shaking your head with a small smile. “Fine. I’ll talk to him.”
⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *
“Don’t let this go to your head.” You said taking another sip from your glass. Patrick held his hands up as he found your gaze. “Hey! I’ve been good.” He raised an eyebrow watching you for a moment. 
He’d all but jumped at the chance when you’d begrudgingly approached him explaining that your son (for reasons you had no idea) wanted him to come to dinner. 
Patrick knew damn well why your son had made that specific request. You were by far the hottest person he’d met at that damn club and your kid was pretty cute too. Maybe he was wrong to bride a 9-year-old with the promise of £20 and a new trick shot but hey! It had worked out for them both. 
“Loosen up a little.” He grinned as you placed your drink down. “You’ve been glaring at me for the last hour.”
“I’m trying to will you away.”
“How’s that working out for you?”
“Well, you’re still here so…”
Patrick hummed sitting back in his seat. He pointed a finger at you, waving it around slightly as you frowned. “I know you like me. I know that because otherwise, you would have said no.”
You scoffed. “Just because I’m giving my son something he wants doesn’t mean I liked you.”
Patrick smiled, the same one that made your stomach flip - not that you’d ever admit it. “Whatever you say, Sweetheart.”
“Stop calling me that!”
⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *⋆·˚ ༘ *
You’d unleashed a monster. 
Patrick’s advances had only worsened since that damn dinner. His eyes seemed to linger on your chest for a moment too long as you handed him the cash before dragging your son away ignoring the way you could feel his eyes boring through you.
Other than that he’d been… okay.
Until right now.
“Why are you at my front door?”
“Suprise.” He smiled leaning against the doorway. You leveled him with an unimpressed look at he looked sheepish for all of a minute. “I was just passing by and decided to say hi.”
“Mhm.” You nodded letting out a sigh. “He’s at his dad's.”
“It’s not him I wanted to say hi to.”
Patrick shot a look down your path before peeking over your shoulder and into the house. “Nice house…very you.”
You frowned shifting slightly. “What do you want?”
Patrick huffed rolling his eyes. “God your no fun.” 
Part of him loved it. The challenge of cracking that cold exterior just enough to weasel his way in. He’d seen your softer side, the way you acted around your son was almost a polar opposite of the glare you seemed to always be levelling him with.
It was hot.
He was many things and determined was one of them. He would crack your walls if it was the last thing he did. 
“I know this is all an act. The whole I hate you thing.” He leaned slightly closer, his forum almost looming over you. “You’re playing hard to get. Other guys might have just called it a day ya know? Been on the end of your glare one too many times and decided to call it quits.” His hand slowly curled around your own.
“Unfortunately for you, I’m just as stubborn as you.”
You hummed, trying to ignore the heat swirling in your stomach because you would not fall to Patrick Zweig’s charms. You’d spent the last year doing everything in your power to keep him away yet he’d somehow weasled his way into your life.
“You don’t know anything about me.” 
He raised an eyebrow, his eyes flicking to your lips for a moment. 
“Oh yeah? I think we can change that.”
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toruro · 2 years ago
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— ✧ oh my!
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pairing: xu minghao x reader
description: choosing to be roommates with vernon chwe would undeniably be one of the few life-changing decisions you made in your lifetime. he brought along support, friendship, and most importantly: a hot friend. — or, in which you’re roommates with vernon and you happen to fall for one of his many chaotic friends.
tags: smut (18+), oral (m receiving), just stupid mutual pining, fluff, seriously self indulgent, mentioned past toxic/controlling relationships
w/c: 13.6k
a/n: REPOSTED. this was my first attempt at a kpop fic ever and my first time writing smut so please bear with how awkwardly written it is. a fic that was supposed to be multiple parts but i couldn't come up with a real plot either so ummm … nevertheless i hope u enjoy!
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I. OH MY!
Moving in with Vernon is among your top life changing decisions, pretty much ever.
You two met in college, first sharing a calculus class together and occasionally studying together. Your friendship was budding—he was someone you could count on and never had to second guess. Spending more time together, you naturally grew closer, eventually reaching a point that when Vernon mentioned moving out of his shitty studio, you two immediately decided to find a place together.
Fresh out of college, it was the best decision in all ways possible—money was not nearly as big of a burden as before, and it was fun having a friend to talk to whenever you wanted in the vicinity of your own home.
It’s been an enjoyable eight months since you two started renting out this place together, and this evening, you’re in the kitchen cooking some brownies with an old package of brownie mix you found shoved in the back of one of your cupboards. You’re making a bit of a mess, but you can only hope that Vernon doesn’t mind too much—you will clean it, after all.
You’re in the midst of pondering about how long it’ll take you to clean up the little (big) splatter of flour you dropped on the ground when there’s a buzzing that comes from your phone. You huff, looking down at your fingers that are coated in oil and brownie batter. Setting down the bowl you were mixing, you then go to wash your hands as the buzzing dies out. After wiping down any moisture left on your skin, you pick up the phone to see a missed call from Vernon.
Did he forget something? you wonder, pressing the call back button and holding your phone up to your ear. You hear him pick up the line almost immediately, curious to know why he called you. “Hey,” you say casually when you know he can hear you. “Everything good?”
There are a few voices in the background that you hear, and you recall how he told you this morning he’d be hanging out with his friends. “Yeah, yeah, everything’s great. Look, I was wondering if it would be okay with you if my friends came over to our place? I would’ve asked earlier but I didn’t think we would be hanging out more and…well you get it,” Vernon sighs.
Your lips make a little ‘o’ shape, nodding to yourself as if Vernon could see you right now. “Yeah of course they can come over!” you tell him.
“Are you sure?” he clarifies, and you smile at the sincerity. “It’s just—I mean like they’re probably going to stay a while?” It comes out as a question and you laugh. “Don’t laugh at me,” Vernon grumbles, “I’m just making sure because they’re probably going to stay late in the night and there’s a lot of them.”
“Yes Vernon, I know there’s a lot of them—twelve to be exact,” you retort. “Yes, I’m okay with it, it’s not like I do anything these days anyways. I’ll be fine,” you tell him honestly.
“Okay, thank you so much,” he replies, relieved. “We’ll be there in like ten minutes.”
“Ten?!” you shrieked, quickly taking in the giant mess you made around you, baffled when you think about how you’re going to clean this up.
“Yes, sorry,” Vernon murmurs. “These guys change their minds so much and—ugh—you get it. We’re already close to the apartment complex so we’re just going to come up. Is there a problem?”
You hum, looking around you. “I might’ve made a bit of a mess in the kitchen, but…but I’ll figure it out.”
Vernon laughs. “I doubt they’ll care—most of them are dogs.” You giggle at the muffled protests heard in the background before he continues. “Anyways, thank you, I owe you one. See you in five.”
Your phone beeps when he hangs up and you stand by yourself in the middle of the kitchen. “Five?” you whisper to yourself, “Fuck! He said ten! But now five? Fuck!”
You whip your head around to look at the kitchen, grimacing as you’re dawned with the realization that there is no way you’re going to clean this up before they come. It takes you around 5 seconds to debate your options, finally deciding to just give up on trying to clean up and focus on finishing the batter and getting the pan in the oven.
You set your phone back down on the counter, picking up the batter bowl and giving it a few more stirs to rid it of any clumps before spreading it all out on a pan. It takes you a few moments to find the mittens and stick it in the preheated oven, a wave of relief washing over you when you’re done.
That’s one thing out of the way…I guess , you think to yourself, letting your hair down from the tight up-do you had it in earlier. Looking down at your black t-shirt and yoga pants, you take a few moments to try and dust off whatever flour rubbed off on the cloth. Of course, many stains still remain, but you figured this was better than nothing.
You’re about to grab a broom to clean up the floor when you hear a knock at the door. Sighing in defeat, you wash your hands once before heading to the door. You’re placing your hand on the door knob before you hear some clicking, hesitating to open once you realize it’s Vernon on the other end unlocking it himself. You step back from the doorway as the door is pushed slightly ajar, allowing you to poke your head through the small gap.
You’re met with the sight of multiple guys crowding around the door, a slightly frantic and honestly exhausted-looking Vernon leading the group. “Hey,” he greets as you step back once more, pulling the door open fully.
“That was less than five minutes!” you exclaim, trying your best to ignore the gazes of the unfamiliar faces behind Vernon. You’ve seen pictures of them before on Vernon’s social media and stuff but you don’t really know them at all—you’re only aware of bits and pieces from the stories he tells you occasionally.
“I’m sorry!” he puts his hands up in surrender, stepping through the doorway as you back into the kitchen that remained in the chaotic state you left it in.
“I didn’t have time to clean!” you whine, frantically waving your hand at the kitchen, allowing Vernon to take in the scene.
“Hey, hey, hey,” a new voice pops in and you see a hand snake it’s way around Vernon’s shoulders. A man with blonde hair and a chiseled face looks at you sympathetically. “It’s not Vernon’s fault,” he tells you calmly. “You can blame it on us for changing plans quickly. Don’t worry, Vernon feels bad about it, he told us.”
You sigh, a small pout making its way onto your face. “Fine,” you huff as the rest of the boys fill the large room that contains the kitchen and living room. You aren’t sure what to do now, watching them all shuffle around, taking off their shoes and attempting (key word: attempting ) to organize them in front of the doorway. You hadn’t really thought this far ahead—should you go to your room now? Would it be awkward to just hang around here while they’re in the living room (your kitchen and living room are basically one large room, so there’s no real way to avoid them)?
You’re glad Vernon picks up on your uncertainty. He turns to his friends, speaking up and saying your name, which catches you by surprise. “My roommate,” he clarifies, as they all look at you. You smile awkwardly, giving a small wave before averting your gaze. Vernon then turns around, pointing at the couch across the room, “Now can one of you set up the Mario Kart?”
The rest of the boys nod, beginning to break out into small conversations by themselves as they all make their way to lounge in the connected room, finally giving you a bit of space to breathe (not that they were making you uncomfortable or anything—you’re just a little shy).
“I’m sorry again,” Vernon tells you, and you can hear the genuinity in his voice. “What were you making, by the way?” he asks curiously, peering over at the mess.
“It’s okay! And I was making brownies—I found some old box mixes in the back of the cupboard and I figured I should make them before they expire,” you explain, looking over at his friends who have now settled in the living room comfortably. “Do your friends want some? I’ve made a big enough batch for everyone, I’m sure,” you tell him.
“Are you sure?”
“Vernon can you stop asking me if I’m sure,” you complain loudly, running a hand over your face. You hear a snicker come from the other side of a room, catching sight of one of Vernon’s friends seated on ground, a playful smirk on his face upon hearing your conversation. You feel your ears burn, quickly turning back to Vernon. “Yes, I just made them for fun. It’s better to share with them than have us eat all of it,” you chuckle, picking up a dustpan from the corner of the kitchen to begin cleaning up.
“Okay fine,” Vernon murmurs. “Thank you a lot,” he concludes, finally turning and joining friends on the couch. You begin your work to clean up the flour you dropped on the ground, getting lost in your own little world after slipping in your airpods, tuning out the noises of rowdy men and Mario Kart sound effects.
You’re practically done with cleaning the kitchen when you hear your timer go off, nearly skipping to the oven to turn it off and pull out the pan of brownies you’ve been putting so much effort into. The aroma floats through the room, and you catch the glances of a few of Vernon’s friends who peek over, trying to get a look at whatever you’ve come up with.
You smile to yourself, placing the pan on the counter before pulling out a knife to make nice, even pieces. It takes you a few moments, but once you’re done, you look down at them happily. Slipping on your mittens, you carry the tray over to the living room, a small, upwards curve pulling at your lips.
The boy you remember from earlier—the one who laughed at your reaction to Vernon—notices you first, and you can’t help but wonder how you didn;t recognize him from any pictures because holy hell he’s pretty. His eyes are looking at you through heavy eyelashes and there’s a coy smile tugging at his lips—he’s charming .
It takes you a good five seconds to realize you’re staring at him and another five to realize he’s caught you in the act. You whip your head away, looking at the rest of the boys, some of which who are intently focused on the game on the screen, others of which who are indifferent.
“Um, I made some brownies, if you guys want,” you tell them all, clearing your throat. “They’re fresh, so they’re a little hot, but you can wait for them to cool down.” You set down the pan on the table as the rest of them quiet down, some immediately spewing out words of gratitude.
“Aren’t you going to have any?” one of them asks, and you recognize him as the tallest. Mingyu? You recall some stories about him.
You shrug. “I kind of just made it because we had the boxes left…I think it’d be better if you guys shared it.”
Another boy with glasses sitting on the armchair speaks up. “You can eat it with us—our way of saying thanks,” he encourages. You throw out a close lipped smile, glancing at Vernon as if to ask if this was all just a show of politeness or an actual offer. He offers the slightest nod, and your once tight smile is let loose. You nod your head cheerfully, looking around you to find a spot to sit.
Noticing your confusion, the boy with the blonde hair and sharp face from earlier points to your right. “Sit next to Minghao, I’m sure there’s room there.”
You look down, met with the gaze of him , trying your best to hide your twinge of excitement as you silently shuffle over and sit down at the edge of the rug. Minghao . You like that name, you say to yourself in your head before shaking your head lightly—what are you thinking? You can’t be crushing on a guy you just laid your eyes on!
Inhaling sharply, you turn your head to the screen, grateful to see everyone else’s attention has also averted to the heated one-on-one match between the glasses guy from earlier (you now have learned his name is Wonwoo) and Mingyu.
They’re a loud bunch, but you can’t find it in you to mind—watching them all get along so well, so freely, is liberating in itself. You feel relaxed in a way you didn’t know you could be.
As content as you feel right now though, there’s an anxious thought buzzing at the back of your mind, and no matter how desperately you try to push it back, it keeps crawling its way up, especially when you feel your thigh brush Minghao’s .
Stop it , you chide yourself. Stop it! A little more harshly. Stop thinking about him!
“Hey…” the first time he says it, the words don’t quite reach your ears. “Hey,” he says again, nudging your thigh with his knee, increasing the minimal physical contact you two already had. You’re snapping out of your daze in an instant, whipping your head up to look at him . “You good?” he asks, and while you can tell he’s being sincere, there’s an almost playful smirk gracing his lips.
“Huh…oh, yeah,” you murmur, bashful that he caught you lost in your own head, thinking about him. “Just zoned out for a second,” you explain with an awkward laugh, pulling your legs into your chest and resting your chin on your knees.
“I could tell,” Minghao replies, and you can’t help but gaze at how cool he is as he reaches toward the coffee table, cutting himself a piece of the brownie. You watch him carefully as he takes a bite—you’re honestly just admiring his face, but you think you can brush off your shameless ogling as looking to see if he likes the brownie. He catches you staring, and you’re unsure of what he thinks of it, opening his mouth to talk again once he’s swallowed it. “It’s good,” he tells you, and you smile.
“I’m glad…it would have been kind of embarrassing if it wasn’t.”
“Don’t worry—chocolate isn’t even really my thing but I like it,” Minghao compliments, and you can’t tell if he’s being genuine or faux out of sincerity. Your grin brightens nevertheless as you sink back into the front of the sofa behind you, averting your gaze to the screen once again.
You’re feeling a little shy, of course, and the silence that now sits between you and Minghao isn’t uncomfortable or awkward, rather it’s…heart-warming. Your smile doesn’t leave your face as the room is full of cries and laughter and taunts as the results of the first round are revealed.
You sit in an amused silence, watching them for around another twenty minutes and even getting to play once (albeit your minimal effort—Mario Kart always gives you a headache anyways), before quietly standing up as the boys are cheering over Wonwoo winning yet another match. Minghao looks at you as you raise yourself above him, and your stomach churns at the way he raised a brow.
“Leaving already?”
You shrug casually. “I think it’s about time I get to doing my own stuff,” you explain, throwing out a small smile before retreating to your room before Minghao—or anyone else—can notice or say anything. You’re grateful Minghao didn’t make a scene about you leaving—it’s not that you don’t like the boys (far from it), but you’ve been tired the whole day and were looking forward to a nice nap.
Settling into your bed after shutting your blinds, you pull the covers up to your chin shooting a quick text to Vernon to make sure he wakes you up for dinner if you didn’t wake yourself up in time. You shut your eyes tight, doing your best to ignore the tight feeling that settles at the bottom of your stomach.
The second you identify the feeling, you squeeze your eyes closed tighter. Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Your words don’t aid you, of course, because all you’re thinking about his stupid fucking Minghao and his stupidly hot face and his stupidly cute smirk and the stupidly handsome way he looks at you and— oh my god you need to turn your brain off right now.
You settle on not breathing, trying to pretend you’re dead, in hopes it’ll lull you to sleep. Of course, the effect is the opposite of your intentions—the lack of oxygen only reminds you of the way Minghao took your breath away when you first noticed him.
You huff to yourself, rolling your body over so your face is pressed into the pillow as you quietly curse to yourself. “God, I’m so fucked,” you whine, childishly pounding your fists against the plush of your mattress.
You’re being immature, you know you are—like a child throwing a tantrum—but who can blame you? He’s just so pretty and that smile of his is so endearing and you can’t help but find yourself so falling for him.
It’s a miracle that you fall asleep at all, let alone so quickly. You figure the exhaustion from the past week has finally caught up to you, even with the onslaught of attraction that came your way after seeing Minghao.
When you wake up, it’s much darker. The sun hasn’t fully set yet, but the sky is painted a deep red which is bound to morph to purple within a few more moments before finally sinking into nighttime. You glance around and you realize that the only thing besides the outside light that’s illuminating your room is your bed lamp that you forgot to turn off.
You rub your eyes a few times, still in a bit of a groggy, drowsy daze, before remembering what woke you up in the first place—the knock on your door. “Hello?” you croak out, immediately slapping a hand over your mouth at the mangles sound that leaves your mouth. It’s quiet for a moment and you’re able to identify the faint voices in the rest of the apartment as Vernon’s friends.
Your mind is suddenly racing through the possibility of who could’ve knocked on your door and— oh my god! What if it’s Minghao?! What if he heard y—
You hear your name being called out softly and your speeding train of thought falters. It’s Vernon. Thank fucking god. “You up?” he says through the door and you pull the covers off of you to meet him at the door. Poking your head through the crack as you open it slightly, you squint immediately at the intrusion of light to your unadjusted eyes.
“Good morning,” you joke, stepping back to let him in. “Thanks for waking me up…jeez, I was knocked out,” you murmur to yourself, rubbing a hand over your face as you walk to your dresser to find yourself a comb. “What time is it?”
“It’s like six…the guys were worried that they were being too loud when I told them you were sleeping,” Vernon muses, pulling up his phone to scroll through something. “But I was like nah she sleeps through everything—and I was right,” he says with a laugh as you roll your eyes, trying to make yourself more presentable as you pull your hair back into a low do.
“Whatever…did you guys have fun? I’m assuming so since they’re still here…”
“Yeah, we’re ordering dinner right now. I told you they were gonna stay for a while. That’s why I woke you up too: I was gonna ask if there was anything specific you wanted—if you wanna eat with us of course,” he explains, holding up his phone to display the food delivery app he had opened earlier.
“Would that be okay? If I had dinner with you all?”
“Yeah of course, no one would mind,” Vernon assures you as you look at yourself in the mirror, fixing your hair, narrowing your eyes at your roommate.
“You sure?”
“Okay now you need to stop asking me if I’m sure,” Vernon huffs with a roll of his eyes followed by your laughter.
“Okay okay, fine,” you reply. “Give me like two minutes I’ll come out and we can decide something with everyone,” you say, ushering Vernon out. He puts his hands up in surrender, turning around to join his friends in the other room. After he leaves, you debate with yourself whether or not you should change or join the rest with your pajama pants and loose fit t-shirt.
Overcome with the still lingering drowsiness from your nap, you choose comfort, and decide to just throw on a loose cardigan over whatever you’re wearing now before stepping out of the room. A yawn escapes your lips as you enter the living room, catching sight of all the boys lounging around—some are seated on top of the kitchen island, legs hanging over the edge, while others are laying down on the couch with their feet kicked up, the rest with their legs folded on the ground.
You try not to stare at Minghao too much when he enters your line of vision, but the task is becoming impossibly harder the longer you look: he’s laid back on the couch, feet resting on a blonde boy—Jun, you think is his name’s—lap, and you don’t miss the way his arms are crossed behind the back of his head, shirt lifting up just enough to reveal a little bit of the skin that dons his torso.
You begrudgingly peel your eyes away from the marvelous sight when you hear someone call your name, heads turning to you once they realize you’ve finally joined them.
“About time,” the boy with sharp features from earlier—Jeonghan—says as a greeting, waving you over as he stands next to Vernon. “Come on, help us decide what to order.”
“D’you sleep well?” another asks, and you turn your head to see who’s speaking as you approach Jeonghan. You recognize the boy now as Seungkwan, and you smile while nodding. “I swear me and Chan thought you were dead!” he exclaims jokingly as you furrow your eyebrows.
The boy next to him shoots Seungkwan a death stare before speaking up, much to your amusement. “What Seungkwan means is,” Chan begins with a huff, “we were playing a game and Mingyu lost and he yelled and we were scared we woke you up but nothing happened!”
“I told you, she sleeps through everything,” you hear Vernon mumble from behind you, not missing the joking look that’s toying with his face. You roll your eyes and hit his shoulder, loud enough for everyone to hear and cause them to laugh, smiling internally at the reaction you were able to elicit.
“That’s not true!” you whine, looking over his shoulder to see what restaurants they were choosing from.
“Joking, joking,” Vernon mumbles, turning his phone so you could see better. “We’re choosing between Mexican and Thai. You can choose which, since we’re all pretty evenly split.”
You hum for a second, thinking about which you’re craving more, finally settling on, “Thai!”
There are some cheers that erupt behind you, and your face heats up right away when you turn around to see some of them (Minghao in particular) with cheerful smiles and fists of victory in the air. “Thai it is!” Vernon announces. “Tell me what you guys want,” he says before looking at you. “The usual?” you nod with a grin, backing away as he places the order while the others call out the array of dishes you want, making your way to the seating area to sit down by one of the sofas (totally not because that’s where Minghao was sitting).
As you settle down onto the ground, Minghao speaks up. “Do you want to sit here?” he asks, sitting up from his horizontal position, pulling his legs back to make space between him and Jun on the couch. Your eyes shoot up, darting between Minghao’s deep brown eyes and the space on the couch.
“Are you sure? You can lay down if you w—”
“Nonsense,” Jun says with a chuckle, and you can’t even comprehend what’s going on until you feel Minghao’s cool fingers wrap around your wrist, tugging you up slightly as a direct invitation to take up the spot next to him. God his skin is so soft and his touch is demanding yet so gentle and it’s just enough to get the butterflies that you thought died off to be resurrected once more. “Our way of thanks for choosing Thai,” Jun tells you.
“Yeah,” Minghao agrees, and you try your best to focus on what he’s saying even if it’s impossibly hard with the way his body is pressed up right against you. He leans back as if to stretch his body, arms reaching back behind the couch and settling in the space behind you,
God, you feel like you could die on the spot—it’s not like he’s got an arm wrapped around you or anything so why does this feel so intimate? You can only hope and pray that he doesn’t feel the immense heat radiating off of you as you adjust yourself to sit more comfortably on the couch. In hopes to diffuse the tension that you’re kind of sure you’re the only one feeling, you speak up. “Do you guys want to watch something? A show? A movie?” you suggest reaching forward to pick up the TV remote from the coffee table.
“I’m down,” Wonwoo says with a shrug.
“Oh yeah!” Seungcheol speaks up, “I’ve been wanting to rewatch Batman for a while!”
“Batman then?” you, looking around at everyone as you click the remote to pull it up after you see the nods of their heads. You put on the movie, sinking back into the couch as you do your best to focus on the screen in front of you, and not the faint touch of Minghao’s arm to the back of your neck.
You’re successful for a bit, thankfully, but your peace of mind hardly lasts when the food comes in and everyone settles on the ground to eat—your and Vernon’s rule that there’s no eating curry on the couch. You, Minghao, and Jun slip from your spots on the couch and sit on the ground where your feet lay just a few moments ago, and suddenly you’re hyper aware of the little space you three are squished up against.
It’s a miracle, you think, if Minghao doesn’t notice the way your skin burns against his as his thigh is pressing right up against yours. This touch is different from the one in the afternoon—that one was…light…innocent. This one…this one’s different—it has you burning and yet shivers run down your spine. If you were a little bit more in your senses, maybe—just maybe—you would notice the tight lipped smile that tugs at Minghao’s li ps as well.
Oh my! Now the crush begins.
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II. COME TO ME
That night, after the movie, the food, and some beer, the twelve boys shuffle out of the house at around eleven, murmuring soft and tired “thank yous” and “goodbyes.” You can’t deny that you’ve been…a little stiff the entire evening. Sitting next to Minghao for a good 2 hours wore you out—it was a constant battle between your moral consciousness and your…budding feelings.
Stop looking at him! You’d say one moment, but then, god—oh my god his hands! No! Stop! He’s so close to me —stop acting like you’re in middle school! But his smile is just so pretty, god he lights up the room , but wait, stop being so cliche!
Naturally, you're convinced you’ve gone insane. Once the boys left, you and Vernon are left in the comfort of each other’s silence before beginning to make small conversation as you guys begin to clean up (the others honestly didn’t leave that much of a mess, you were just a bit of a clean freak).
“Your friends are fun,” you tell him quietly as you throw out the food containers that you finished earlier.  Vernon looks up at you with a small smile, and you can tell that he’s been anxious about you not enjoying your time.
“That’s good, I’m glad.”
“Why haven’t you brought them over before?” you ask curiously, pondering about how there might have been a chance you could have laid your eyes on Minghao ages earlier. “Aren’t they like your best friends?”
Vernon shrugs. “Well yeah, they are, but there’s a lot of them, like you saw. I didn’t know if you’d be okay with that, today just happened to be a day where it was hard for me to say no to them.” You laugh heartily at that—the image of Vernon being persuaded by twelve guys looking at him with puppy eyes. “I really am glad you liked them though. If it’s okay I’d like to have them over more,” he puts out tentatively.
Of course, you perk up at that—maybe a little too noticeably. “I’d love that!” you say excitedly, before shrinking back down at how eager you sound. “I mean like, of course I won’t barge on your time with them but they’re really fun to be around and I’d like to see them more often,” you explain, placing your hands on the counter now that you’re done cleaning all the dishes. Vernon seems to catch onto something and you want to die from embarrassment with the way he’s raising a brow at you.
But if he does notice anything, he doesn’t say it, instead choosing to shrug again and trudge away from the kitchen. “That’s great. Can I have them over next Saturday?”
You blink once then blink twice. “Of course,” you reply without a second of hesitation.
Saturday can't come soon enough. With your own work to do, you find your mind drifting constantly to the face of a pretty man who you can't seem to stop thinking about. You need to scold yourself every single time you realize you're daydreaming—god no, more like fantasizing—about a man who you've not only seen only once, but is one of your roommate's best friends.
Daunting as it is, you're finding this whole situation quite...fun. You can't remember the last time you've felt something so pure and rejuvenating as this crush—gosh, you feel childish for calling it that but what else can it be? Your heart palpates when you think about him, your eyes ache to see his beautiful face again, and holy hell you don't even want to get started on the raw goosebumps you get when reimagining the moment where his skin brushed up against yours.
It's Friday night now, and your stomach swims with anticipation of what tomorrow will hold. You're sitting on the couch in your living room when Vernon comes home from the gym, dropping a bag of food on the kitchen counter. "Hey, I was at the gym with Mingyu and he got me some leftovers that his mom made," he tells you as you look up at him.
"Oh sweet," you say, relieved you won't have to go through the effort of figuring out what to make for dinner. "Your friends are coming over tomorrow, right?" you ask, feigning nonchalance—fucking acting like tomorrow hasn't been the only thing on your mind for the past one week.
"Yeah, they're gonna come up pretty early actually. I was gonna ask you actually, if you wanted to come with us since we're planning on going to the beach later. It's gonna be pretty hot and we haven't gone down in a while," he explains, beginning to open the bag of food as you get up and join him, trying to ignore the endless thoughts that run through your mind.
"The beach? Of course I'd want to come—wait, would that be okay with them? I wouldn't wanna intrude in on your day."
Vernon shakes his head with a chuckle. "Oh my god can you stop?" he says jokingly, "they were the one's who suggested, actually. Not that I don't want you to come either—I do—I just want you to know that they enjoyed you being there last week just as much as you did."
"Really? Who suggested it?" You hope you aren't coming off as too curious—Vernon is perceptive, and you'd be a fool to think he couldn't figure out exactly why you're so insistent on figuring out who asked for you to be there.
He seems preoccupied though, taking the food out of the containers, much to your relief. "Uhh, it was Minghao I think. But like everyone agreed after that, Jeonghan even said he'd pay for your ice cream if you came."
You're convinced the universe is bullshitting you right now. Minghao? Your Minghao? Asked if you could join them? At the beach?
You might just pass out.
Naturally, Vernon looks at you funny. "Are you good? You look like you've just seen a ghost."
You shake your head nervously with a smile, turning back to grab a piece of fried chicken he pulled out. "No no, I was just thinking about if I even have any swim suits—I think I threw them out last summer because of Jungho," you murmur, and while it's not the full truth about what you were just thinking about, it is something that's on your mind. Vernon looks at you with a frown.
"You threw them out because of Jungho?" he asks sadly. "Fucking hell, I forgot how crazy he was," he murmurs, looking down to take his own bite of the food. You shrug solemnly, finding yourself in a mood a bit more down than you'd like.
"Weird times," you reply simply. "Think I could just go to the beach in like some shorts and a shirt? It's just water after all."
"Yeah that should be fine. We'd be leaving before noon so I don't think you'd have the time to buy new ones anyways," Vernon agrees, pushing himself off the counter.
You nod with a smile, ignoring the small pang of sadness you felt just moments ago. "Sounds good."
You're a heavy sleeper—you always have been—and given that it's a Saturday, it's no question that you're bound to sleep until Vernon is banging your door to make sure you aren't dead. Seriously. Saturday morning, despite your excitement, kicks off with a groggy start. You're rolling around in bed, ming hazy as you aimlessly try and figure out what time it is and what exactly woke you up since you know you don't set alarms for weekends. It takes a few seconds for the knocking on your door to register in your brain.
You blink once and rub your eyes, squinting so that they can adjust to the light as you peer at the clock, realizing that—shit, oh shit, it's almost 11. Didn't Vernon say that his friends were going to be here in the morning?! And that they were gonna leave before noon?! Shit!
You're scrambling out of bed, digging through your drawer as you call out a meek, "I'n up!" to whoever's knocking on your door, throwing on the only swim suit that you—thankfully—found tucked away in your closet the night before, covering it up with some shorts and a loose top that you picked earlier as well. You're quickly faced with realization that you still look like you just rolled out of bed which, to be fair, you had. That doesn't stop you from frantically brushing through your hair, trying to put it into a simple braid before finally feeling ready to open the door.
You're expecting to see Vernon, in all honesty, since that's how it went the last time they were all over. The man standing in front of your door is, in fact, definitely not Vernon. No, the man in front of your door is Xu fucking Minghao, and you think you're absolutely fucked by the way your knees go week.
"Hi, sorry, I hope I didn't rush you," he greets politely, stepping back, allowing you to take a good look at him. He's wearing a white sleeveless shirt that hugs hugs his body tightly, followed by a blue hawaiian shirt that sits loosely on his upper half. His lower half is adorned by simple swim trunks, and you do your very, very best to not stare at his calf muscles.
"I, uh..." your voice trails off, in a haze from how attractive he is as well from your fading drowsiness. You rub your eyes once under your glasses before responding. "It's okay, I don't know why I didn't get up earlier," you huff to yourself, looking down, "I thought I would."
"Don't worry about it," Minghao murmurs, and he brings a hand up to your head on top of your hair to ruffle it a bit. You might just scream. "It's good that you slept," he continues, walking back to the living room as you follow him. "We thought you'd wake up from how loud we were," he says with a chuckle as you enter the room with everyone else in it as they turn to you.
"Yeah," Seokmin agrees through a mouth full of muffin, Joshua lightly hitting his shoulder and chiding him for talking with his mouth full.
"She's awake!" Jeonghan cheers playfully.
"i know Vernon said you'd sleep through anything," Chan begins to admit, "but literally do not understand how you didn't wake up until now. I swear, there was a moment where Soonyoung was just screaming at the top of his lungs and we were all wondering if that was gonna get you to come out but Vernon didn't even bother to check."
Your face burns at the comment, but there's a warm sort of feeling that bubbles up in you when they all laugh—it's not a mean laugh, no, it's friendly and it's kind, and it's making you feel welcome.
"You guys just don't listen to me," Vernon huffs, tossing you an orange from the kitchen. "We're going to head out in like five minutes," he tells you. "We need to figure out the car situation because I think Wont's car and Joshua's can only five each and mine can hold four."
The next few minutes are spent trying to figure out who's going to go in which car, everyone deciding that Seungcheol, Seokmin, Chan, and Jun would be going in Wonwoo's, Jeonghan, Jihoon, Soonyoung, and Minghao would be going in Joshua's, and Mingyu, Seungkwan, and you would be going in Vernon's. You won't and say that you aren't a teensy bit disappointed that you don't get to sit with Minghao, but the beach is only a twenty minute's drive away anyways, and you feel this is also a chance to get to know Vernon's other friends better too.
The car ride is fun, and you enjoy Seungkwan's cheeky remarks to everything, laughing along to pretty much everything he says, as well as Mingyu's oddly calm hyperness...? You aren't sure how to explain it but there's a constantly endearing and jumpy aura radiating from the tall boy, yet he seems quite tame for the most part. Nevertheless, you're entertained and excited to spend more time with them as Vernon parks the car on the beach, pulling out his phone so he can figure out where the other's are.
"Ah" you murmur, as the fourteen of you are grouped up finally, making your way into the hot sand and towards the water. "This is like the perfect weather for the beach," you say, wiggling out of your slippers so you can walk on the sand with your bare feet. Seungkwan is standing next to you as you both trail behind the rest of the crowd a little, the both of you immersed in the warm feeling of sand between your toes.
"I love the beach," he says, throwing his head back to look up at the bright side. "I'm from a beach town, so when I found out that the beach—and all my friends—were here, I just had to move here too, you know?"
"The beach is nice, but I won't lie, it always makes me so exhausted after I spend a day out here," you admit, dragging your feet across the sand, basking in the hot feeling it brings. "Who knows, I'll probably go home and sleep so hard tonight that even Vernon might think I'm dead," you joke, causing Seungkwan to chuckle.
You two continue to talk about the beach and Seungkwan's home town as your group nears the water, everyone beginning to set up their towels and the picnic blankets you bought. Everyone helps out, and before you know it, Mingyu, Jeonghan, Seungcheol, Seokmin, and Seungkwan are ripping off their shirts and running towards the water. You watch them with amusement, standing up to shimmy out of your shorts and shirt.
Vernon looks at you, speaking, "You were able to get a swim suit?" he asks, confused considering your conversation with him last night. You smile somewhat sadly, and Minghao, sitting next to Vernon, can't help but notice.
"Uh, not really," you mumble, looking down at your black bikini. "I think Jungho just never knew about this one so I didn't get rid of it, and it was just shoved in the back of my closet or something. Anyways, I'm burning and I really want to get into the water," you conclude, turning around without giving Vernon a chance to respond.
As you run off into the water, Minghao turns and looks at Vernon him. "Who's Jungho?" he asks, shameless about his curiosity.
Vernon frowns as soon as he hears the name, and Minghao wonders just what kind of person this Jungho guy might be. "Just some ex. A really shitty one," Vernon murmurs, looking out at the sun. Minghao feels something uneasy churn inside of him. He gives Vernon that look, which tells him he wants to know more. "Like he just sucked. Didn't treat her right and shit. I didn't like him at all. None of her friends did. He tried to get her to throw out all of her swim suits and stuff because he didn't trust her at the beach or some bullshit like that."
"Goddamn," Minghao hisses, leaning back on his hands as he watches you play in the water. You looked like you were having so much fun—you were so at ease. He wants to chide himself for looking at the way your skin glistens in the sun, your bikini hugging your body in all the right places and in all the right ways. He knows he shouldn't be thinking about you like this, especially when he's only just met you a week ago, but that isn't to say he hasn't missed your quick glances. The way your eyes dart towards him, his body, his eyes, his lips, and quickly jump away when you realize he's caught you.
You feel the same way, he's sure of it. Minghao knows you feel the same tingles, the same sparks, the same rush of pure happiness when you see each other.
His thoughts are interrupted by Joshua speaking. "He made her throw out her swim suits?" he exclaims incredulously. "Insecure much," he mutters under his breath, and Minghao laughs along with that. "Good thing he's just her ex now—that sounds horrendous."
"Agreed," Minghao replies while Vernon nods, standing up to pull off his hawaiian shirt and top. "I'm gonna go into the water," he tells the rest of his friends before jogging lightly, following in your faint footsteps.
You're feet hit the water, and you stop in your tracks as you take a few moments to get used to the temperature change. You're looking up to see Seungkwan and Jeonghan waving you over to around twenty feet further into the water, but you call out to them to tell them to wait a second as you just melt in the feeling of the water against your toes. You stand there for a few moments before you hear a familiar voice coming up from behind you.
Oh. My. God.
You don't even want to turn around because you're scared of your reaction to seeing him shirtless—god, you aren't even sure if you'll be able to contain yourself! You think if you pass out, you'll just have to blame it on the heat, but still, how are you going to be—
"Hey," Minghao says cooly, stepping next to you in the water and holy crap, he's toned and he's practically glowing in the sunlight, the shadows hugging every peak and curve of his chest, his arms, his hands, his collarbone, his v-line—oh my god you need to stop. Practically ripping your eyes away from the wondrous view that is Minghao's body, you're forcing yourself to look up at his eyes (not that it's any less of a view—his eyes sparkle just as much as he does).
"H-hi." Did you just stutter? No fucking way you just stuttered. You think you might have to drown yourself right now. "I thought you were going to stay around with the others a bit longer," you say sheepishly. Minghao smirks at you, and he thinks now is his chance to try and fluster you up a bit more.
"Well I can't just let a pretty girl go into the ocean by herself, now can I?" he replies smoothly, taking a few steps in front of and waving you to follow him, and you would only if you hadn't just stopped breathing. How could he say that so casually!? How could he—wait. Wait! He just called you a pretty girl. He thinks you're pretty. Xu fucking Minghao finds you pretty, and he's saying it to your fucking face. You actually might die right now.
You can't even formulate a response, just tearing your gaze away from him and smiling shamelessly at the ground as you follow behind him slowly. Mission accomplished, Minghao thinks to himself, and something inside of him goes batshit crazy by seeing you so smiley and undone.
"W-whatever," you finally say as the water near to your hips as you two start nearing the others guys who are currently splashing each other with water. Minghao watches them, and get an idea, playfully splashing some water your way. You jump back quickly, eyes widening before you gasp. "You did not!" You quickly splash water back, but Minghao seems to see it coming and he moves out of the way. "Get back here!" you yell, running after him as he nears Mingyu, hiding behind the larger boy. With your eyebrows, you pay no mind to this, continuing to splash water everywhere, hoping that at least some of it will get on Minghao.
Mingyu puts his hands up, eyes scrunched up as he tries to block the water that's inevitably going his way. "Hey! Hey! Hey! Not me! Not me!" he cries out as the others laigh.
"Get Minghao!" you call out to the other boys who catch on quickly, joining you on your rampage against Minghao. Eventually there's just so much water splashing everywhere that within minutes you're all spent, gasping for air as you all try to rub the water away from your eyes. Once your vision is no longer blurry, you blink hard a few last times before turning your vision towards Minghao again and holy hell, you didn't think he could look any hotter than he did sitting in the sun but wow. His hair is wet and hanging low on his forehead but it's so messy and so hot and all you can think about is running your fingers through those locks yourself and making a mess in your own little way and—okay stop, you can't be thinking about this, especially not in public.
It takes a moment for you to fully calm yourself down before you're laughing with the other guys as they start to play a new game. You try to ignore the butterflies you get whenever you near Minghao, but it's a painfully hard task. You grow to accept the feeling as the minutes go on, simply existing alongside the bubbly feeling instead of pushing it down.
The next hour is spent in and out of the water, everyone else eventually joining those of you in the water, and you find that time is passing faster than you can even think. Time with them is fun, it's carefree, it's liberating, it's refreshing. Once you're all too tired and too spent, you're trudging back to the little spot you all have set up as everyone begins to pull out the food they packed. As you snack on your lunch, the fourteen of you sit in a circle and talk about the plans for the rest of the day.
"Let's play beach volleyball," Wonwoo suggests after everyone's finished eating, and it's no doubt that everyone else pretty much agrees immediately.
"Yeah, I saw a court in that direction, and I'm sure we'd be able to find a ball," Jihoon adds on as everyone stands up.
"I think i'll stay behind," you tell them all, leaning back on your hand as you fan your face with the other. "I'm kind of tired and I think I just need to sit down for a bit," you explain.
"That's okay, but you sure you won't be lonely," Vernon clarifies as he stands up.
You shake your head, but right before you're going to respond, Minghao speaks up. "Don't worry about her, I'll stay behind too." God, someone save you—your poor heart can't take much more of this.
"Oh okay, great!" Joshua says happily, the others standing up as well to go follow Jihoon to the volleyball court. "Catch you later!" You and Minghao wave at the rest as the drift off into the distance before being left in the silence that sits between you.
Minghao speaks first. "It's nice that you came, it's refreshing to have someone new, especially if they're like you."
You raise a brow at him, turning your body so that you're completely facing him, legs crossed as you lean forward. "Like me? What does that mean?"
Minghao gives you a sly smile, like he was expecting this. "Fun. Easy-going." He pauses. "Pretty."
"Is this your way of flirting or do you just enjoy being very direct about what you're thinking."
He laughs at that, throwing his head back. "Nice one. Those two are actually the same thing for me, so take that as you see it," he says with a shrug. You're face is on fire, and you're sure he can tell by now. Minghao catches on and he leans forward. "Is it working?"
"Maybe it is," you murmur nonchalantly.
"I think it definitely is," he shoots back with yet another smirk. God, you can't do this anymore. He's just so close to you and you don't know if it's because it's hot or if you're flustered or whatever but you're burning and not thinking straight and before you know it you're leaning in so close that you can feel Minghao's soft breath on your lips, stopping right before you two can connect.
It's the silent words now: kiss me, kiss me Minghao, and you almost think that this is true love when he leans in immediately after, heeding your silent requests.
Minghao's lips are plump and soft and taste slightly salty from the remains of the ocean water, in contrast to the sweet way he's got one hand cupping your chin. His thumb strokes at your skin and the touch is so light that you think you might go insane, gripping onto one of his biceps as you try to ground yourself in reality—in this moment, that you're scared might almost just be a figment of your imagination.
News-flash, it's not. In fact, this moment is very much real, very much happening, and very much one of the closest things to heaven you've experienced.
When you pull away, his hand is still on your chin and yours still rests on his arm. "I won't lie," you whisper, "I've been thinking about doing that all week."
"Me too," Minghao admits almost immediately, the revelation sending both shock and relief coursing through your veins. You let go of his arm, finally, and he drops his hold too, but you scoot closer to him so you're not sitting side by side as you face the ocean. "We shouldn't do anything else right now," he says quietly, and you know he doesn't have to say to know what you're both thinking. "I don't think you'd want the others seeing anything."
"You're right," you say with a nod, but you still interlace his fingers that are next to you with yours on the ground. Minghao squeezes your fingers back slightly in confirmation that this is very much okay. "Do you want to get something to eat? I saw some people selling fruit on our walk through the sand," he suggests after a few moments. You nod along, shuffling through the pile of clothes that are everywhere so you can find your shorts—it's sp warm out right now that your skin and swim suit have already dried off.
While you're fishing out your shorts and slipping them on, Minghao finds his hawaiian t-shirt and slips it on, although his bare chest is still very much on display, despite your poor heart's cries for him to cover it up—no! Don't let anyone else see! You blush bashfully at your newfound jealousy of others seeing Minghao the same way you do, but those thoughts are soon pushed away as he reaches out a hand to you to help you stand up. You grab his hand with a smile, following after him as you both head toward the fruit stands at the front.
"What do you want to get?" he asks you when he sees you squinting to try and see what they're selling.
"Pineapple!" you cheer when you realize one of the stands has your favorite fruit, and Minghao can feel his heart swell at the sound. "Can we please get pineapple? It's my favorite fruit and it's the best for hot days."
Minghao smiles and nods, and your heart nearly pops out of your chest. "Pineapple and mango?" he suggests as you stand in front of one of the stalls, pulling out his wallet. You nod before thinking for a moment, pulling out your own wallet before he has a hand a hand on your waist, pushing it away. "I'm paying," and it's not a question when he says it. You slowly push your wallet back into your pocket, mind racing with the thoughts of how a man can be as perfect as Minghao.
"Okay well," you reply, pulling your wallet back out in defiance, "I want to buy some fruits for the others too," you explain. "And I don't think it's fair for you to pay for all of that."
Minghao huffs, letting go of your wrist before turning back to guy at the stall. You two end up splitting the cost of five cups of fruits before returning to the set up on the sand that you have with your arms much fuller than before. Back once you're both sitting, you chat about whatever and you definitely forget how to breathe the multiple times that Minghao picks up a toothpick and feeds you the fruits himself. There's something so domestic and so comforting about the way you both smoothly speak, move, flow—being with Minghao is languid and despite your racing heart at the thought of being with him, you feel...relaxed.
This feels right.
After around an half an hour of talking, you find yourself laying on your back as you have Vernon's hat on top of your head as you listen to the ocean. "Should we go to find them? They'll probably be hungry by now and beach volleyball is starting to sound fun," you say, sitting up and readjusting Vernon's cap on your head.
"Bored of me already?" Minghao teases, sitting up as well, readjusting his shirt.
You roll your eyes. "You know that isn't it. The fruit isn't gonna taste as good later, even if we keep it in the cooler. It tastes better fresh," you reason.
"Fine fine," he murmurs in defeat and you grin, getting up to pick up two of the cups of fruit while Minghao grabs the other two.
"You know where they went?" you ask him, looking to your left and right, trying to recall which direction the boys left in.
"This way I think," Minghao says, pointing to your left and you squint, nodding excitedly when you see some volleyball courts in the far distance.
"Wow, that's pretty far," you think out loud as you both start walking in that direction.
"Can't handle it?" he coos, looking down at you as he takes his effortlessly long strides.
You scoff, turning your head away as you feign nonchalance. "Whatever."
"I'm joking," Minghao says quickly, reaching one hand over to pick up the cups of fruit your holding so that he's holding all four now. You're about to protest but he simply turns his arms away from you so they're out of your reach.
"Thank you," you say sheepishly, holding your hands behind your back as you two begin to speed up your pace when you both realize that the fruit will grow warm soon. It takes around seven to eight minutes for you guys to reach the volleyball courts, calling out to Vernon when you reach hearing range. "We brought fruit!" you yell, pointing at the cups that Minghao graciously carried for you.
The boys run over, almost all of them in a panting, sweating mess.
"It's like you read our minds," Seungcheol tells you and Minghao, picking a strawberry and stuffing it into his mouth.
Seokmin nods along, picking up a piece of mango. "We were just talking about how we're already hungry again."
"Yeah," Chan agrees, "and I think Mingyu was gonna pass out in the next five minutes if you didn't bring him something to eat." You all look at Mingyu who's sitting across from you, legs out and upper body leaning on his arms behind him as his face is scrunched up—he nearly looks like he's dying.
"Fuck you all!" he groans, falling back onto the sand. "I swear, Jun and Cheol were targeting me! They kept hitting the ball in my direction!"
Jun laughs at that, throwing a hand up to Seungcheol for a high-five. "Damn, I didn't think you'd catch on."
"How could I not!?" Mingyu whines, sitting up again to pick up another fruit. "I was on the verge of the death because of you guys."
Jeonghan ticks his tongue as everyone laughs, "Ah, don't be so dramatic Gyu, we were just having fun. Plus, who doesn't want to win."
Mingyu grumbles as he kicks some sand Jeonghan's way as everyone retreats back into the normal conversation of the plans next. After a few moments of discussion, you all decide to go back to your set up and stay there until sunset before heading home.
Once you all make your way back, the hours are spent chatting, building a moat (Mingyu and Chan seemed especially interested in this for some reason), and playing in and out of the water. As the sky begins to merge from blue to yellow to a deep orange, you begin cleaning up. At the moment, you aren't sure who brings it up, but the word "sleepover" gets thrown around and everyone is practically on their knees, asking to sleep over at Vernon and your place.
"Why our place?" Vernon complains. "Why not Minghao and Jun's? Or Joshua and Jeonghan's?" he begins throwing out the other's names.
"Because we like yours the most," Joshua says simply, everyone nodding their heads vigorously in agreement. Vernon huffs and looks at you for help, but you only shrug—you aren't sure how to respond to this and you aren't going to pretend like you aren't a teensy bit excited about the chance of Minghao spending the night (even though there'll be 12 other guys in your home).
"You guys owe us," Vernon finally says with a deep sigh, "big time."
The car ride back begins by Vernon, Joshua, and Wonwoo yelling at all of the passengers to not get sand into the car, and while you all desperately try to heed by their wishes, it's nearly impossible. You should've expected that nothing with this group is ever especially peaceful, but you're pleasantly surprised by how every event with them somehow has you bursting into laughter until your stomach hurts.
When you all return to your apartment, it takes a messy, chaotic hour or two for everyone to sort out when they would be taking showers, realizing that you should have planned this better once you knew that fourteen people would be scrambling to try and use your and Vernon's single shower. Once you're all washed up, you're left sitting in the living room, trying to figure out how you're going to pass the next few hours. Of course, one brings up Mario Kart, and suddenly they all perch against the couch trying to see who can beat Wonwoo.
It's now when you start to feel the exhaustion of the day catch up to you, recalling how you told Seungkwan that beach days make you tired. You excuse yourself to your room, locking the door behind you before slipping under the covers and nuzzling against the pillow.
In the silence—well not really silence, since apartment walls are thin and boys are loud, but still—of your own room, you find yourself catching a moment for you to properly think. And then it all comes crashing onto you.
Minghao. His lips, his eyes, his arms, his hands, his fingers, his lips (yes, his lips again), his touch, his gaze—and holy hell do you need more. You almost whine out loud into the sheets at the thought of having to wait for him any longer, your brain fuzzy from both your exhaustion and the tingling feeling that courses through your nerves.
Your mind races through the endless possibilities of what has happened and what can happen and before you know it you're falling asleep.
It's two hours later at around 8pm when you hear your phone buzzing by your chest, hardly lifting your head to see who it is. When you recognize the caller as Vernon, you hit the answer button, putting minimal effort into lifting the phone up to your ear as you grumble.
"God, do you ever stop sleeping?" he huffs on the other end, and you can faintly hear someone in the background laugh. You rub your eyes as you push yourself out of bed, rummaging through your drawer to pick out a cardigan to throw on.
"Sorry," you grumble with a yawn. "Beach days make me tired."
"I can see that. Anyways, we're in the living room ordering takeout, so hurry up if you want to have your choice," he threatens playfully.
"Alright alright," you mumble, trying to make your bed a little neater before leaving your room and heading towards the living room. They're all there, as expected, some movie playing on the TV as Jihoon is playing something on the guitar (where the hell did he get a guitar from?!) and Wonwoo and Mingyu are playing yet another game of Mario Kart on the Switch tablet.
"And she's here!" Chan exclaims, causing some eyes to turn to you. Minghao, sitting on one of the chairs at the kitchen island turns to you quickly, and the eye contact has you turning into mush immediately.
"When you went to your room," Vernon begins to say, distracting you from your thoughts and placing a hand on your shoulder, "I thought you were just going to chill for a bit. I didn't expect you to be napping."
Seungkwan comes in and swats Vernon's hand away from you. "You're so judgemental Sollie! Let her be!"
"Thank you Seungkwan!" you agree immediately, turning to raise an accusing eyebrow at Vernon. He rolls his eyes and steps away, holding up his phone which has the food order on the front screen.
"Hey, I'm ordering your food!"
You step back, putting your hand sup in surrender. "Okay fine! Fine! What are we getting tonight?"
"Mexican!" Jeonghan calls out. "It's my treat!" Everyone cheers as you tell Vernon your order, sitting down on the ground in the living room as everyone bunches up in the middle to begin discussing the next big problem you all have—sleeping.
It seems like no one quite thought this out earlier but your apartment is small and fitting fourteen people into this space seems near impossible, especially when you know that they'll all insist on you sleeping alone in your own room. It's a hassle to pull out all the extra pillows and bed sheets that you have, everyone trying to clear space to make as many makeshift beds on the ground as they can.
Somehow, you're all able to fit eight "beds" in the living room, Chan and Seungkwan being the lucky ones to squeeze into the extra space that Vernon has left on his bed and Jun and Jihoon calling the spots on the sofa and arm chair. From there on out, time seems to pass easily with the thirteen of them, and you're starting to understand how Vernon's been able to be their friend for so long. The hours pass quickly and by ten p.m., you're spent and tired from the day—too tired to go on.
Before you know it, you're helping them all make the final touches to the makeshift beds, bringing out as many extra comforters as you can in hopes to make sleeping on the ground a bit more comfortable. Bidding goodnight, you wave to them all and retreat to your room, but not before staring at Minghao for maybe a little too long. He stares back, of course, and anyone else would miss it, but you don't—the way he nods slightly, before turning away to say something to Jun.
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III. OUR DAWN IS HOTTER THAN DAY
It's eleven when you hear the knock on your door, and it's embarrassing how quickly you scramble out of bed to open it. On the other side, as expected, is Minghao. You're pulling him in without a second of hesitation, grabbing his neck and slamming his lips onto yours hard. His hands are making their way onto his hips immediately, moving up and down along your waist and torso to feel every inch of you that he can. You've both been waiting for this for ages, and it's about time you lose control.
"Hao," you whine softly as he presses you into your wall, his tongue running against the corner of your mouth. His only response is kissing you deeper, teeth clashing as you seek to explore every last bit of each other. Minghao swears he feels his dick twitch at the way you call him by his nickname, his fingers tightening their hold on you.
"You'll drive me crazy," he murmurs, kissing down your neck as you run your hands up and down his arms to feel the curve of his arms.
"That's the—ah—plan," you grunt as you sucks at one spot on your skin. Minghao continues peppering your skin with kisses before you feel like enough his enough, intertwining your fingers in his hair and pulling his head up so he can look at you. "Can I suck you off?"
Minghao is, undeniably, taken aback by your forwardness, and while his head his telling him to take his time with you right now, his other head is telling him to give in. In any other situation with any other girl, he would be denying you, taking his time to at least finger you first but he's been too pent up and too horny since the first time you kissed him to say no.
You're surprised when he quickly nods—you aren't the type to dive right into this kind of stuff but Minghao has been doing something that's reconnecting the wires in your brain, causing the overwhelming urge to sink to your knees for Minghao to crash into you.
The second you're on your knees, you have your hands on the waistband of his shorts, pulling them down at once with his boxers to reveal his length, long and pretty and hard with a bead of pre-cum dribbling off the end. You reach up, holding the base with a hand as you look up at Minghao to meet his eyes.
"Fucking hell," he groans, throwing his head back before you reply with a hiss.
"Quiet! They can't hear," you remind him, before adjusting yourself on your knees so you're in a better position to prod his tip at the front of your mouth. You drink in the way Minghao's breath hitches as your lips wrap around him, tongue swiping at the tip softly before pulling back.
"Don't—" he takes a deep breath, "don't be a fucking tease."
"'m sorry," you mumble, pulling your head back. "Can't help it." You kind of mean it and you kind of don't. Honestly, you aren't sure what to think—all you want to do is make Minghao feel good and do it now. Minghao notices the desperate glint in your eyes, and he takes this chance to wind his fingers into your hair, pulling it back into a makeshift pony tail so he can move your face in the face that he wants. The thought has you both going down into a spiral.
Minghao looks down at you so intensely that you think you just might cum from the look alone, but then he's speaking. "You okay with this?" he asks quietly, running a thumb along your lower lip with the hand that's not holding your hair back.
"Yes," you reply almost instantly, and your eagerness has his eyes darkening—you can see it.
"Fuck," he groans, leaning back again while he takes your hand that isn't wrapped around his length up to his thigh. "Tap twice if you want me to stop, 'kay?" You nod quickly, hoping Minghao will get the idea that you're beginning to grow impatient.
Message received, it seems because before you know it, Minghao is guiding your mouth back to the tip of his length, so you can take him in. Once you have your lips wrapped around him, he pushes you forward more, causing your eyes to widen as you realize he's nearly hitting the back of your throat. You take this as your chance to do exactly what you've been aching for, and you begin to bob your head back and forth.
The moan Minghao lets out is near perfection, and you're immediately encouraged to push more, to push deeper, to do whatever it takes to make him make that sound again. You're about to do it again before you feel your hair being tugged so that you're fully pulled off his cock. "Fuck," he chokes out, looking down at the sight of you with red, puffy lips and blown-out eyes. "Do that again," he demands, and you don't waste a second before you wrap your mouth around him and push down as far as you can. His hand is pushing at the back of your head, his soft words from above encouraging you to go harder to go deeper because you're his angel and he knows you can do it.
God, the words that are spilling out of his mouth are downright filthy but they're messing with your head and before you know it your moving your head back and forth in sync with Minghao's hips that are snapping forward slightly, causing him to batter the back of your throat. It's not the most comfortable feeling but the discomfort definitely not what you're thinking about when you hear Minghao's pants—his soft groans that escape his lips now that you've got him so desperate.
There's drool running down your chin and it's so messy but it's so hot and it has your pussy aching but you can't even think of relieving yourself—not when you can feel the vein on the understand of his dick against your tongue, not when his hand is laced in your hair with such a tight hold you think you might just pass out, not when you know he's so close to his release within minutes all because of you. "Fuck," he grunts again, snapping his hips once more, particularly harder and sloppier this time. "I'm gonna—fuck, I'll come soon."
Your jaw is aching by now but it doesn't compare to the throbbing you feel in your panties—god, you're going to go crazy. You use your hand to rub whatever of his length you can't fit in your mouth, using these last few moments to let Minghao jut his hip and shove your mouth further onto him and holy hell do you love it. You can feel it coming with the way he twitches inside your mouth and you can tell he's about to come when he pulls you off of him, before you're opening your mouth wide again, eyes silently begging him: inside my mouth.
It's like earliedirtr, when you kissed, except now it's so much more frantic, so much more ecstatic—Minghao hears your silent requests and only takes a second to push himself back into your mouth. You only need to suck once or twice before you feel it in your mouth—his cum, hot and shooting down your throat. He pulls out after that, you taking a second to swallow and then lick the glossy tip, your body filling with pride at the way you see his leg twitch.
"God—fuck," Minghao finally manages to say between sputtered breaths, "You're so hot." He pulls you up by the arm as he slips his boxers and shorts back on, placing a hand on your hip as he brings you up for a fierce kiss. Your lips are all swollen and Minghao is extra gentle with the way he runs his tongue along them, kissing you so softly you almost forget that he just face-fucked you less than a minute ago. He's pressed up against the wall right now, but takes this moment to flip you both so it's you who's leaning back.
Minghao pulls away from your lips, chuckling at the way yours chases his in the few seconds after, before connecting his lips to your neck like earlier. "Let me give you something in return, yeah?"
"Yeah," you agree, nodding dumbly the second you feel his hand slip down your shorts, ghosting over your panties.
"Fuck, you're so wet," he groans as he pressed down through your panties.
"Hao," you moan, as he rubs little circles on your clit over the fabric, "please, please, hurry." Minghao chuckles and usually you'd be embarrassed but then again, there's nothing usual about getting fingered by your roommates best friend while all of his friends are asleep in the next room over. Minghao still is going slow with you, taking an extra moment to slowly push your panties aside. You're growing so impatient, the throbbing between your legs getting so impatient, that you think you might start sobbing. "I've been so good, Hao, please? I wanna cum," you beg, meeting Minghao's eyes as you look up at him.
God, you're doing something to him, he thinks—you might just be the death of him. You just look so cute and so desperate and the way your eyes are already glossy has his dick hard again. The fact that he didn't even have to ask  you to beg for him is more than enough for a million thoughts to be racing through his mind, but in all honesty, the only thing he wants to focus on right now is making you come.
"Angel, fuck," he murmurs, into your skin, placing a kiss on your collarbone as he uses one hand to lift your shirt up to your neck so he can hold one of your tits, the other hand running through your folds so he can coat his fingers in your slit. "You wanna come?" he coos, prodding one finger at your entrance, and he thinks he might tease you a little longer but then he sees how quickly you respond and it has his resolve crumbling. He sinks is finger in and it's so long and so thick and reaches places in one go that you can't even even imagine of reaching with your own fingers.
You let out a deep sigh, instinctively grinding down on his hand so that your clit is also brushing against his palm adding to the stimulation. Minghao is gentle in the first few moments, moving his finger in and out at a steady pace before you murmur his name once more, causing him to push a second finger inside. "Oh my god, Minghao," you moan, and his eyes shoot up at yours, using the hand that was at your tits to cover your mouth.
"Quiet," he demands, as he continues to fuck you with your fingers. The sound of your wetness and his fingers against your gummy walls is echoing though the room and all you can think about is how dirty and how erotic this feels, and you moan again quietly again at the thought. Minghao's fingers still inside of you at the sound, and you feel your eyes widen and tear up once more. "Be quiet, or I'll stop," he murmurs, resuming his ministrations once he sees you nod.
"Minghao," you say quietly, throwing your head back when you feel him start to play with one of your nipples. "Feels so—so good," you hiccup, doing your best to keep quiet. He's fucking into you ruthlessly now, the pads of his fingers hitting spots you didn't even know existed, and you know your end is close by the way your vision nearly goes white. You grind against his hand harder, and Minghao picks up on the subtle movement.
"Gonna cum?" he breaths out and you don't even have it in you to say anything, your only response being your quickened movements. "C'mon angel, cum for me," he whispers into your ear and maybe it's his voice or maybe it's the way his fingers have you seeing stars or maybe it's the stimulation of your clit against his palm or maybe it's everything combined but you're cumming hard and fast within seconds around his fingers, and holy shit you think that might just be the best orgasm of your life.
You're left panting as Minghao's fingers slow down inside of you, twitching every few seconds from the overstimulation, before he's pulling them out of you and your panties completely. You want to hide your face, looking away when you realize how wet they are. "Why're you looking away?" Minghao asks, grabbing your chin so you can look at him. "It's hot," he tells you with a shrug, bringing his fingers up to your mouth, raising a brow. You're slightly embarrassed, yes, but you'd be a fool to try and deny him, opening up your mouth and suck your own wetness off him when he presses his fingers into your mouth.
After you swirl your tongue around him a few times, he pulls his hands back, replacing his fingers on your mouth with his lips, kissing you sweetly. You bring your hands up to his hair, moving your lips in unison as he places one hand on your waist, pulling your shirt back down to cover you.
"That was fun," you finally say when you're both pulling away.
"You're gonna drive me up a wall," Minghao mutters under his breath, taking a small step back. "But it was." He's silent for a moment before speaking again. "I'm gonna head back—wouldn't want anyone to wake up and find out I'm not where I supposed to be."
"You think someone would wake up?"
Minghao chuckles, and you feel those butterflies again. "You were pretty loud," he says, bringing a hand up to scratch the back of your neck.
"Whose fault is that again?" you ask.
"Dunno," Minghao says casually. "He must be super hot though."
You click your tongue as Minghao walks backward toward your door. "Hmm, I'll have to agree with that."
He smiles and kisses you hard one last time before ruffling your hair. "Sleep well angel."
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a/n. not even going to bother reading this through because i'll get embarrassed. dw guys i'm working on a better hao fic soon >_<
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plus-size-reader · 1 month ago
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Meeting the Family
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Foggy Nelson x Plus size!reader
Word Count: 1821 words
Warnings: none
Summary: Foggy asking Matt about you, his hot foster sister who comes to bring them some take-out one night.
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“Yeah, we’re here. Just park wherever. I’ll buzz you in, it’s 312”
Matt’s voice mindlessly filled his apartment as he spoke into his phone, currently pressed between his shoulder and his ear.
He had been on the phone for about six minutes now, and right about the time it started to sound like plans were being made, that was when Foggy’s interest peaked.
After all, he lived in their shared place too and whatever was going on was bound to involve him in what seemed like a matter of minutes.
“Whose on the phone?” He whispered, getting quickly waved off as Matt focused on the task at hand. Whoever had called seemed to be still chatting away which only interested Foggy further.
So, out of options, he made his way over to the window, hoping that whoever was coming up was close enough to the building for him to scope something out.
…and he was in luck.
Right across the way, in the parking lot attached to the student center was a young woman talking excitedly into her phone, lugging bags of chinese takeout in her free hand.
In all honesty, he doubted that was who was coming to visit, as neither Foggy nor Matt had had a pretty girl visit them since moving in but the details didn’t matter.
Once he started looking at her, he felt like he couldn’t stop.
Everything about her was captivating to him from the bright smile on her face as she spoke to the way she cleverly dodged tripping on the curb after clipping her heel stepping onto the street.
It was charming, as charming as a complete stranger could be and it actually made his chuckle.
“Nice save” he laughed under his breath, thinking about all the times he’d nearly wiped out in the same spot. “What is?” Matt wondered, suddenly appearing behind Foggy and nearly making the man jump out of his skin.
Apparently his phone call had ended, and he’d taken it upon himself to sneak up on his roommate, which always seemed surprisingly easy for him, given the whole being-blind-thing.
“This girl on the street, she almost ate it on the asphalt” he allowed, making room at the window for his roommate, not that he would be able to see her anyway.
Matt nodded, listening to your footsteps as you approached their building and made your way up to the call box. It was after official visiting hours in the building, but as long as he let you in, there wouldn’t be a problem.
Then, almost in sync with your movements, came the buzzing from downstairs. “That’s my sister, she wanted to see the place so I had her bring some food”
It was casual, all things considered, and still, the news hit Foggy like a ton of bricks.
Sister?
Since when did Matt have a sister?
“Hold on. You mean, you are related to her?” Foggy clarified, his jaw practically hanging down to the floor as he tried to process this new information.
Why was this the first he was hearing about it? And had you been this adorable the entire time?
Matt took a passive note of the way his roommate’s heart rate spiked briefly but thought nothing of it. Foggy was excitable and this wouldn’t be the first time he overreacted.
“Not really. We grew up together at the orphanage, became each other's family” he explained, hoping that was enough information without getting into your shared and very complicated history.
Really, there were enough stories between the two of you to fill hours and hours but there was no point dwelling on that now.
“That’s cool. I have a couple siblings too. I just didn’t expect to be meeting the family” Foggy tried, wondering casually if he needed to change into a cooler shirt before you made it up the three flights of stairs or if that would be too obvious.
After all, it was sort of against guy code to go after your buddies hot sister but it wasn’t like Matt wanted you anyway. It would be a waste if he didn’t at least make a good impression.
The knock on the door sent both men into motion, but for two very different reasons.
Matt made his way across the short expanse of the apartment to the front door while Foggy beelined for the bathroom, figuring he could fix his hair if nothing else.
“Hey Matty” you cooed, a wide grin on your face the moment Matt appeared in the doorway.
You two hadn’t seen each other since he moved in and, in your opinion, that had been far too long. After all, you had spent most of your lives a few doors down from one another.
You weren’t used to having to travel to see him.
“I heard you tripped in the parking lot on your way up” he joked, pulling you into a tight hug and closing the door.
You scoffed, at first because he would have the guts to make fun of you when you came all this way with the best chinese food in town and then because there was no normal way for him to know that.
“How?-” you started but he waved you off with a gentle nudge, “Nosy roommate”
Then, as if on cue, Foggy emerged, doing his best to look both as handsome and as normal as he ever had. His hair was still untamed, sitting just below his shoulders, but at least he’d brushed it.
That had to count for something.
“You must be the nosy roommate” You nodded, pointing him out as you put the pieces together, “It’s nice to meet you, I’m Y/N”
On instinct, you produced your hand for him to shake it but Foggy didn’t move. He wanted to, he really really did, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t do anything but stare.
Which was definitely very calm, and normal of him.
There was a beat of silence as you tried to figure out what to do, and Matt waited for Foggy to say something but it never came.
“That’s Foggy, and you can set the food in the kitchen”
You nodded, tapping his arm gingerly as you passed so he’d know you walked away before setting a new course toward where the little kitchenette across the apartment was.
Their place was no bigger than a dorm but considering two college boys lived in the space and one of them was completely blind, it was well kept and way nicer than you would have expected.
As soon as you were out of earshot, Foggy turned to his roommate with what could only be described as an incredulous glare dressing his face.
“Hey, so not to be weird but what the deal with your super hot sister?” Foggy hummed, hoping that his tone didn’t give away how aggressively he was ogling you to his best friend.
He could have used a heads up, at least.
He didn’t want to be inappropriate or make either of you uncomfortable of course but it wasn’t every day that such a beautiful woman invited herself into his living space and he was a little caught off guard.
He didn't want to miss an opportunity.
Not that you were an opportunity, of course.
He would never stoop so low as to think of you that way, he just wasn’t that kind of a guy.
Still, he was a guy and there was no getting around the fact that he was sure you were the most stunning person he’d ever laid eyes on, and he’d seen lots of people in his time.
“First of all, there’s no deal and second, she isn’t super hot” Matt answered, scrunching up his face as he considered that the reason behind Foggy’s increased heart rate was likely surrounding you.
Which was already far too much information as far as he was concerned.
“I can assure you, my friend, that she is uber hot, even if you can’t see it for yourself,” the blonde argued back, shamelessly letting himself watch as you searched the cabinets for actual plates.
You were sort of just hoping they would have some.
“Hold on, I’ll be right back” Foggy allowed, leaving Matt searching for which one of the movies in their extensive DVD collection they could watch while you were here.
You had gone through and made him braille labels for all the cases a while back, and now, all he had to do was decide which of the vast selection seemed right.
“The plates are up here” Foggy called, half jogging toward where you were still searching to reach up and grab the few dishes they had acquired together.
It didn’t even occur to him to wait for you to move before he did though, resulting in you basically being boxed in between his frame and the countertop.
There was a moment between the two of you as you met his eyes, a couple plastic plates held in his hands, the space between you essentially miniscule.
“Thanks, I was starting to think I’d never find them” you tried, doing your best to cover up how flustered the situation had made you, because you had just met him, after all.
There was no way you could have a crush on him already, right? Those things took time.
Though, how much time definitely seemed to vary because in the twenty minutes he’d known about your existence, Foggy would definitely say he had some kind of feelings for you.
He just wasn’t sure how to go about acting on them yet.
Foggy laughed, it still not occurring to him that he should back away from you, mostly because he didn’t really want to. “It’s no problem. We don’t really use them, not a lot of company”
That didn’t seem likely to you at first but between the two of them, you weren’t really sure who would have anyone to invite over more than the other.
“I’m sure you have girls over all the time” there was humor in your voice, but you were just as curious as teasing.
Surely you weren’t the first person to have noticed how darling he was. You thought the students at Columbia were supposed to be smart.
“Food’s getting cold!”
Matt interrupted your conversation before Foggy could assure you that, without a doubt, there were no other girls he’d rather have going through his dishware than you.
The reminder that you were not only not alone but also in the company of your brother made your skin hot but you did your best to cover it up with another light laugh. “
Coming right up, Murdock. Don’t get your panties in a knot” Foggy called, making a show of handing you the plates he’d so gallantly fetched for you before grabbing the take out bags, “And just for the record-there are no girls”
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therealcocoshady · 3 months ago
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Kinktober - Day 3 - Pet Play (Part 1)
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Kinktober 2024 Masterlist
A/N : Hey guys ! I'm a couple of hours late for Kinktober Day 3 but here it is ! The prompt is pet play. I actually got really inspired by it and as it turns out, I got somewhat ambitious and it is a long one. I'm not done with it so I will be releasing it in two parts. That way, you can still have something to enjoy on the day of 🤭. Please mind that this is my personal take on pet play, which is informed by reading that I have done on the subject. This kink can look different depending on people's dynamic ! Anyway, I hope you enjoy it ❤️
Part 2
CW : pet play, implied d/s dynamic, soft domination, vanilla
« Honestly, I wouldn’t mind being someone’s pet ». Little did you know these joking words would be the end of you. 
You’d known Marshall for a little while. You had quite a few friends in common and, in spite of your age difference, you had become quite close. You namely shared a love for music and a questionable humor, as well as a knack for pushing the jokes a little too far. Everyone you knew said that the two of you had a chaotic duo energy but they had to admit that it was very distracting. It was all dark humor and banter. You always made fun of each other and you were never short on jokes that capitalized on his status as a lonely, single fifty something man with an hermit reputation. The age thing and relationship status were true. However, he was far from being lonely, or an hermit. Still, you enjoyed teasing him. You were spending the afternoon at his place, just the two of you, browsing through his cassette collection and discussing the latest hip-hop drama, when he made a snarky comment in passing about your recent breakup. Something about your relationships never lasting too long because of you being impossible. « That’s a lot of nerve for someone who’s been single for what ? Four, five years ? At least I’m putting myself out there. You should try that sometimes. », you clapped back. « I didn’t- I mean… You know. I’m just saying you don’t know how to pick guys that can actually handle you. », he tentatively clarified. « I’m not impossible », you argued. « For these dudes, you are », he hummed. « Whatever », you sighed. « Why don’t we focus on you, huh ? You talk as if you were such a big relationship expert buy you’re the lonely, single one. I still have a bunch of options. You, on the other hand…». He stared at you with an amused look on his face. « I’m all good, thank you for your concern, Y/N », he said calmly. You chortled and mumbled something inaudible, causing him to sigh. « To be fair, I’d rather be alone than have to deal with the whole relationship thing », he stated. « So… You don’t miss dating ? Like… You’re ok with the possibility of ending up alone ? » you asked with a raised eyebrow. 
«Yeah I wouldn’t mind some company but I don’t care about it that much », he shrugged. « Besides… Just because I’m not dating doesn’t mean I’m lonely. ». You hummed. Ultimately, Marshall’s dating life was none of your business. But as his friend, even though you sometimes joked about it, you didn’t want him to be alone. You knew him enough to know that, even though his family and friends kept his social life fulfilled, he could easily get into his own head. In truth, you were concerned. « How about a pet ? » you suggested with a smile. « I wouldn’t be a good pet owner, especially now that it’s just me at home » he chuckled. « I work too much. And I’m not sure it’d be too happy here ». You let out a giggle and looked around you. He had this massive mansion all to himself and you could definitely imagine a couple of cats or dogs living their best life. « Yeah, you’re right. Huge houses usually don’t make great spaces for pets » you said sarcastically. He shook his head and smiled. « Here’s the issue : if I want some live-in company, I’d need something as independent as a human being but as easy and docile as a pet » he chuckled. You hummed in understanding, thinking to yourself that this man was definitely too complicated. You already knew it but sometimes, it showed more. « Too bad it doesn’t exist. Maybe we wouldn’t have to deal with you being all cranky if it did » you joked. « I mean, it does. It’s just hard to find the right match » he shrugged evasively. « Huh ? » you asked with a raised eyebrow. « I mean, you know. Like… Different kinds of pets » he hummed. You still didn’t get it. You stared intently, waiting for him to elaborate. But he didn’t. « Like… robots ? » you asked. The question made him laugh, as if you had said some sort of joke. « I know you’re younger, but I didn’t think you’d be so innocent » he chortled. « Like what ? I really don’t get it ! » you defended yourself. « Like pet play, Y/N. That’s what I’m saying. Like… Real people being pets, it’s a thing». You ket out a giggle. « You mean people dressing up in the bedroom for some kinky shit ? » you asked jokingly. « I mean, yeah, that exists. But some people go kind of deeper than that. Even in non-sexual ways. They just have that relationship with someone, where they let go of tension, responsibilities, and they let the other person direct them and care for them ». You hummed, understanding a little better. In truth, you hadn’t really heard of that before. « So they’re treated… like an animal ? Like, they’re fine with being treated like a dog ? » you asked with your eyebrows furrowed. « Some people actually enjoy that. But it’s not so much about feeling like an animal. It’s just letting go, trusting someone to be responsible for your wellbeing. Like, they have rules, boundaries, and they can unwind ». You nodded, finding that it actually made some sense. « You seem to know a lot about this, old man », you teased. He shook his head and gave you an enigmatic smile. « I’m 51. I know a lot about a lot of things. ». You hummed again and chuckled. « That doesn’t seem so terrible. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind being someone’s pet. Maybe it’d help with the constant noise in my head. ». He stared at you intently and chortled. « Right. You. A pet. » he said mockingly. « What’s that ? You don’t believe me ? What are you saying exactly ? » you asked, falsely offended. 
« You’re an agent of chaos, that’s what I’m saying », he chuckled softly. « I’ve been friends with you long enough to know you’d suck as a pet. You just don’t have what it takes ». You crossed your arms, almost vexed by his comment. You couldn’t exactly deny being rather skilled as an agent of chaos, but there was no way in hell you would let him say you weren’t good enough. « You think you know me that well, huh ? », you challenged him. « Maybe I’m not the problem, you know ». He raised an eyebrow. « Meaning ? », he asked, as if to make sure he understood the implication quite right. « You heard me », you said defiantly. « You’re would suck as a pet but, really, you’re the one who wouldn’t have what it takes ». His eyes opened a little wider and he scoffed, shifting to an assured stance. « Is that right ? », he asked. « Oh yeah », you teased.  « You wouldn’t be up to the challenge ». There. You had said them. The magic words that, you knew, flipped a switch inside of his brain. In the few years you’d known him, you had come to learn that Marshall didn’t deal well with people doubting him. And, petty as you were, you didn’t shy away from using that against him from time to time. « You know what ? Let’s settle this. I’ll show you », he challenged. You froze for a second because laughing. « Show me what ? » you asked. « That I’m up to the challenge », he replied. « I’ll prove to you that I’d be quite skilled as a master. You’re the one who would not last a day ». Now, you were the one being provoked. You crossed your arms and tilted your head, gesturing for him to elaborate. « You try being my pet for 24 hours. We’ll see who lasts longer. You or me. Then, you’ll now if you’re terrible as a pet or if I suck as a master. Deal ? ». You stared Ito his baby blue eyes. 
« What’s at stake ? » you inquired with a raised eyebrow. « Honor », he simply shrugged. « That’s the answer of someone who knows he’s going to eat his words », you teased. He looked at you and let out a sardonic chuckle. « Alright, smart-ass, what do you want ? » he asked, seemingly dubious. « Amazing Fantasy #15 » you immediately replied. He let out a laugh and shook his head, as if you had just made a joke. You stared at him with your arms crossed, standing on business. « Do you even know how much this thing costs ? » he challenged. Only you did know how much it cost. That comic book was a rarity, a holy grail. One he kept somewhere in a safe and had always refused to let you borrow, arguing that you were way too clumsy to be trusted with the diamond of his collection. « Last one that was auctioned was sold for over three million. I know. », you answered matter-of-factly. « Though rumor has it that you paid a third of that price for yours», you added. « We’re not betting a million dollar-worth comic book over some stupid pet play joke », he warned. « Relax, grandpa. I’m not suggesting you hand it over. I just want custody of it for a week. », you said. « Two hours. With gloves and supervision. », he counter-offered. « Two days. Here. No supervision. I’ll agree to the gloves. Besides… I thought you were confident. Are you backing down, old man ? », you grinned. « Put some respect on your owner’s name, pet » he grinned as he extended his hand. « You got yourself a deal. But if I win, I want your imperial star destroyer ». You stared into defiantly into his eyes and shook his hand, determined to make him eat his words and win your bet. Not only were you a sore loser and you really wanted to read that comic book, but now that the most precious item of your Lego collection was at stake, you absolutely refused to let him win. « You’re not my owner », you said. « Not until next weekend, that is », he replied with a grin. 
The two of you had agreed that the bet would start on Friday evening at 8PM and that you’d have to be a docile pet for a whole 24 hours. You’d spend the weekend at his place, which wouldn’t be the first time, since he often had people over. You hung out with him often and you’d stayed over in the past. His huge mansion was the perfect place for entertaining people and he tended to take advantage of that. In the preceding days, you had done research on the pet play dynamic, trying to figure out what you should expect. It appeared to be quite a spectrum, with various roles and possibilities. You had agreed to leave the details to Marshall and, although you inherently trusted him, you sort of counted on him to be an asshole to some extent. That being said, you’d previously had a conversation regarding limits, so you knew he was aware of things you absolutely wouldn’t agree to. He was one of your closest friends and he knew you pretty well anyway. That being said, you were a little curious as to what he had planned. Knowing him and his knack for making fun of you, you almost expected pranks. You wouldn’t put it past him to have dress you in some silly outfit and have you eat from a dog bowl.
When you arrived at his place, you greeted him with a hug, as usual. He took your bag and you went to sit on the couch. « I’m surprised you haven’t already bailed » he gently teased. « You know I’m not a quitter, Mathers. Besides… I really want to read that comic book. » you replied with a grin. He hummed and moved a little closer to you. « So, we’re doing this, huh ? » he asked. « Unless you already want to-» you began. « I’m good, pet » he cut you. « Let’s see if you can handle it for a day ». You looked at him defiantly, willing to show you were absolutely not willing to back down. « Bring it on, old man. Whatever you have planned, I can and will handle » you said. He chuckled and walked to fetch something from a drawer. « I figured you’d need something to fully get into it » he said with a grin as he handed you a collar with a little bell on it, as well as a pair of clip-on cat ears. You gave him a side-eye. You knew he would do something corny like this. Still, you weren’t one to fold, so you immediately put them on. « How do I look ? » you asked. « Pretty cute » he admitted. « So, we’ve established that I’m going to be a cat ? » you asked. He shook his head and shrugged, as it it didn’t really matter. «Pets don’t talk, now, do they ? », he asked with a playful grin. « So be a good girl and shut up unless I ask you something or allow you to speak, alright ? », he added. You pursed your lips and stared at him, tempted to run your mouth, but you ended up nodding, not without a slight eye-roll. He chuckled and cupped your jaw, stroking your cheek with his thumb. « Good girl », he softly praised. « And since I’m nice, I’ll pretend I didn’t notice you rolling your eyes ». You were used to having physical contact with Marshall. As a friend, he wasn’t one to be stingy with hugs. But this was different. It was caring and warm and intimate. You sort of liked it, though. As innocent as it was, it sent some kind of warmth through your body, the way he had gently cupped your face and asserted his dominance. He took you to the movie room, suggesting to watch a movie. You figured the weekend and that stupid bet might turn out to be enjoyable. After all, lounging in a lavish mansion, with the promise of being taken care of didn’t sound like a total nightmare. Even if that implied remaining silent and surrendering to someone else. You walked to one of the couched but, before you had the chance to sit, Marshall cleared his throat. « No pets on the couch », he hummed. You immediately gave him a side-eye, although you remained silent. You stood there, watching him. « Don’t look at me like that », he chuckled. « I’m not a monster. I’m not going to make you sit on the floor. I actually got you something ». He went to a corner of the room and brought what resembled a dog bed. Only, it was human-sized and seemed rather comfy, almost luxurious. He positioned it next to the touch and gestured to it, a smile tugging at his lips. « Did a bit of shopping, this week. Wanted to make sure my pet had everything she needs. What do you think ? », he asked. Judging by his smile, you could tell he was pretty proud of himself. Apparently, the collar and the corny cat ears were not enough and you wondered what else he’d bought. « Are you serious ? » you asked. « Are you backing down already ? » he playfully retorted. « Not at all. This looks… Fine, actually ». You kneeled and took place on the dog bed while he sat on the couch. To your surprise, it was one of the comfiest things you had ever sat on, and you almost automatically curled up on the soft fabric as Marshall stared at you with a smile. « See ? ». 
You silently hummed and he picked the movie, opting for some classic comedy, one genre he actually knew you liked. You settled, a little bit apprehensive. Calm and focus had never been your forte and, as much as you enjoyed lounging in front of a movie, knowing you had to be obedient was a little challenging. You were starting to get antsy and fidget a little and Marshall seemed to pick up on it. He gently placed a hand on the top of your head and traced small circles with his fingers. « Relax, pet. Just focus on the movie and ease up ». You hummed and tried your best to ease the tension of the past week. It had been stressful at work and you could feel it in your neck and shoulders. As soon as he saw you stretch your neck and shoulders, he placed his hands on your trapezius muscle region and gently started to massage. You closed your eyes and hummed in approval. « Better ? » he asked softly after a few minutes. « Yeah, thanks » you replied with gratitude, thinking that he wasn’t too bad when it came to caring for someone. « Good. Now just focus on the movie », he directed. You turned your head and focused on the screen. After a while, Marshall got up and left the room, only to come back after a few minutes with some snacks and water. « I know you never drink enough water or really eat when you’re working. Time to hydrate and eat. » he commanded. You looked at him with an appreciative smile and did as you were told. There was something freeing about all of this. You had thought the whole thing would be somewhat gimmicky, but he had actually anticipated your needs. He seemed kind of serious about this bet.  When you were done with the water bottle and the snacks, he gently patted your head. « Good », he gently praised. You gave him an appreciative smile and turned your attention back to the movie as his fingers kept on stroking your hair. Slowly but surely, the noise in your head started to quieten and you began to let go of all the tensions of the past week. In the back of your mind, you knew you were safe, with someone you trusted and felt safe with. When the movie ended, you were in some kind of zone, fully relaxed for the first time in ages. You knew where you were and yet, at the same time, you felt a little hazy. « All good ? » Marshall asked. You simply nodded with a soft smile, something different than usual in your eyes. You were usually in pocket rocket mode, especially around your friends. They were used to your erratic, sometimes chaotic energy, and how you never really stopped talking or fidgeting. No one was really used to seeing you calm and silent. Not even yourself. You could see Marshall smile and he extended a hand for you to get up and grab. « Time for bed, now, pet. I know you had a long day. You need to rest. ». You nodded again and followed him upstairs while he carried your bag. You expected him to drop it in the guest bedroom where you usually slept whenever you stayed over, but he seemed to have other plans in mind. He smiled as soon as he picked up on your confusion. « Pets sleep with their owners, now, don’t they ? » he said with a low voice that sent shivers down your spine. 
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hotchfiles · 11 months ago
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ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ❝ [CHOICELESS HOPE] ❞ — three. need in the devotee.
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pairing: aaron hotchner x bau!reader. summ.: the moment leading up to the kiss, the drumroll, is as good as the kiss itself. it's certainly more innocent. it's completely harmless. cw: canon divergent. emotional cheating. right person wrong time. no use of y/n. wc: 1k+.
previously
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    First cases were always an awkward matter, getting to know new people, having them wonder if you were nice or not and wondering the same thing about them. You thought maybe having Dave around would make it less clunky. Irrevocably wrong you were, as you had to explain the divorce from your cheating husband when he asked how the bastard was.
    Everytime you thought about your divorce it made something in your brain twitch, it had been finalized four years prior but it still hurt, and you got mad at yourself for being hurt, not only because it was a hit to your gut, your non trusting nature decided to trust this one man and he broke it so easily. But it hurt more as deep down you felt like you deserved it. Like it was your karma. 
    “I watched you speak about the importance of profiling for crisis negotiation once. You seemed very passionate about it, almost like Hotch–” You held in a sigh as the genius boy possibly every unit had heard of spoke. You were an expert. A leader in your field. It just happened that your field was the one Hotchner literally wrote the book about. You would have to deal with the comparison constantly now. “Why did you transfer?” 
    “Not the pay, that I can assure you.” That earned you your first group laugh, some of them looking over at Rossi, possibly understanding now why he looked so enthusiastic about your transfer, or because he was the one who mostly talked about the fact the pay was shit. 
    “She was the only one available with experience, and she was forced to.” Aaron clarifies from his seat on the jet, having thoroughly read your paperwork by now. You nod in confirmation, not caring that it wasn’t the best look to have been forced into their unit. It was yours first anyway.
    “Familiarity with the way Hotch works was a factor too, it seems.” Some things don’t come written on paper, only the influence of being one of the unit’s founders, like Dave, guaranteed that type of information, or at least you thought so, as that fact didn’t come to you as reasoning. Still, you wouldn’t lose the opportunity to tease Aaron, even if only a bit. 
    “Familiarity is a way to put it, huh? Most of his methodology was created with me.” Scoffing loudly was his response while he shook his head in disbelief, the rest of the team glancing from you to him in curiosity. 
    “Maybe write a book about it then.” Two hours into the first jet flight and you could possibly punch him in the face to get that little shit eating grin out of it. Or maybe kiss him. 
    “I thought working with you two together would make me feel young again. It doesn’t. I’m too old for this now.” Dave points to you both and looks back to the files, bringing the conversation back to the case in hand. 
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    First two months he tries not to favor your presence, sending you off with Derek, Dave or Spencer to check crime scenes, talk to suspects, witnesses, but like magnets you two always ended up beside each other, too close, shoulders touching while reading files and completing each other’s thoughts for the profiles. 
    You do try to keep your distance as best as you can as well, favoring sitting alone on the jet, talking to Emily or losing to Reid at chess, bonding with the team was an important part of what made any work the best work possible. And it’s not as in better workplace, but better at the job.
    Connecting with the team made profiling better, faster, that was why you and Hotch were quick to make connections, quick to see holes, patterns, when you were together. 
    Still you catch his annoying glances that he makes no effort to conceal when you lock eyes with him, instead he smiles with his teeth and waits for you to look away. And you usually do. 
    Las Vegas being the final destiny though, you had your mind set on not looking away when he did his well known dance of glancing and waiting for you to look back, instead getting up to your feet and walking over to him, savoring the soft, almost shy smile he gave you as he took in your every move, from your seat to the one by his side.
    You take a spray bottle out of the pocket of your FBI jacket and hand him without a word, trying to ignore the way he makes it his job to linger the soft brush your fingers against his as he read the information. 
    “Sunscreen? You know I don’t–” 
    “Don’t like the feeling on your skin, yeah, that’s a spray one, not sticky, not liquidy and it dries out completely.” Aaron listens to you intently, but still has his suspicions, being shown clearly by the way he furrowed his brows even though his heart was skipping several beats by your actions. 
    “What about the smell?” He’s properly fiddling with the bottle as if he was a kid with a toy, taking the cap off and trying to smell it through the sprayer, you roll your eyes and extend your arm to him. 
    “It’s unscented, touch and smell my arm, I’m wearing it.” You’re not really thinking it through when you almost shove your forearm on his nose, he obliges it and takes a deep breath, you feel the air leaving his nose in your skin and get suddenly shy. 
    His cheeks flush in warm pink, the product might be unscented but your skin smells like… You. He could recognize it from a mile away. He thinks to himself for a second and realizes that maybe if sunscreens had your scent he wouldn’t mind using them. And when his fingers softly touch your wrist, getting hold of it to lower it down, he is reminded of how soft you feel so he has no choice but to drop it or else he would be holding onto it for as long as you’d let him.
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ringsreforged · 4 months ago
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Natalie's *deep* Haladriel thoughts - BEWARE
Pau - When you read this later, let me know if you want me to move it to my personal account, yeah? If it even still exists...
I’m not really sure what this post is going to end up being. A defence of the show and the separation? In part! A critique of the show based off leak spoilers and my own gut feeling? For sure! A desperate ramble in an attempt to get my head in order? Absolutely!
I will say before we dive in that I’m absolutely a Haladriel shipper, but the way I ship isn’t always in line with fandom. I ship what I see as part of the narrative because it’s the narrative, and everything else is a bonus. I make this distinction because I think this is why I’m so okay with a lack of scenes when some others are not, and I don’t want to come across preachy. I don't think I'm in any way superior for this by the way. In fact, I wish I could be more *normal*!!!!
If you came to this show for Haladriel alone, and simply want to see them share scenes week to week – that’s your prerogative. I’m not trying to say you shouldn’t feel that way. What I might try to say is that I don’t think that makes the shows bad or suggests that the writers have baited with this relationship. I think that’s ultimately what I find frustrating…
But anyway, let’s get into whatever this is. A reflection on expectations, a five-season arc, and those STUPID spoiler leaks…
AND THERE WILL BE SPOILERS. STAY AWAY. HISS.
Alright, so this post is mostly brought to you by a sinking feeling I have that the leak spoilers are real. Because everything in that episode 7 promo matches up.
STOP READING if you don’t want to know the spoilers. And honestly? STOP READING IF YOU THINK YOU WANT TO KNOW because living with this knowledge has truly made this season less enjoyable for me (credit to it, then, because I still think it’s incredible). IF I’M MAKING YOU PANIC, STILL STOP READING because there very much is a world where these spoilers aren’t that bad in context…but I prefer to keep my expectations low…
Have you gone???
HAVE YOU GONE?????
SPOILER TALK
Okay.
So, the leak spoilers say that there is no kiss between Sauron and Galadriel (which, honestly, I have no great issue with – more to come on that later). Instead, the kiss is ELROND AND GALADRIEL, and I absolutely do take issue with this.
I can only hope and PRAY that it works in context, but I can’t get my head around it. And yet, the promo…it’s all falling into place. Elrond will be sent to discuss terms with the orcs before the battle. He’ll see Galadriel in chains, and he’ll ask for a moment to say goodbye. Adar will allow it because he’s a gent like that. This is where we get the chin touch with the thumb everyone speculated over and then…HE LEANS IN AND KISSES HER TO PUT A NEEDLE IN HER MOUTH? SO SHE CAN RELEASE HERSELF LATER??
To clarify, most of this is my spec, but THE KISS TO PASS HER A NEEDLE IS A REAL LEAKED SPOILER THAT NO LONGER SEEMS FAKE.
It's just…so convoluted and weird??? Does he store needles in his mouth like a squirrel? Why couldn’t he have slipped the needle into her hand??? WHY ARE YOU PUTTING ELROND’S LIPS ON GALADRIEL’S?
And look, maybe this spoiler IS still fake! But the details were so specific, and everything about the context seems to be accurate, so that feels like it would be a bonkers coincidence to me. Maybe when we actually see it play out, it will be fine.
But that does bring me back to the Haladriel of it all, just briefly. With my whole heart, I do not need them to kiss. After season 1, I didn’t think it would be possible, and I’m okay with that. But if you’re willing to let ELROND’S lips touch her, then MY GOD, you could have let Haladriel have ONE kiss where she’s trying to distract him or some shit. OOF.
My only relief is that it happens next week, so we can hopefully get it out of our systems and enjoy the finale.
That said, if these leaks are true then that also means the finale leaks are true. Now, I actually never wanted to see any of these spoilers (hence me making it VERY CLEAR what this post is about, because I wouldn’t inflict this stress on anyone unwillingly), so once I got the Elrond kiss details, I tried to get away without seeing much else. But there was some information on the big Haladriel scene.
I’m actually not going to detail it here, because – overall – I think we’ll still super enjoy it (just…lower those kiss expectations) AND because I don’t think all of it was spoiled. At the end of the day, there will be plenty to unpack, they’ll be back on our screens, it will be meaty, it will be layered. I’m really looking forward to it, in general.
My one fear is that it’s a season 1 finale repeat. And again, that won’t necessarily be bad per se, but it will feel a little bit underwhelming. Now, I’m not somebody that wants a true corruption arc for Galadriel. Normally, I love that shit, but not in this IP and not with this character. I want to see her explore her darkness, I want to see her face it and accept it, and I certainly want to see her be tempted…but I don’t expect or believe we'll ever actually get the whole ‘dark queen of Mordor’ vibe. Prisoner? Maybe. But not an actual dark queen.
That said…surely this scene doesn’t play out the EXACT same way as season 1? Sauron shows her a vision, she’s tempted, but ultimately resists and tells him she’ll never be at his side. I just don’t get why we’d repeat that, when there are so many other options that still keep Gal on the side of light.
I keep coming back to Galadriel’s line to Elrond in episode 4 – when it comes down to it, he has to choose to defeat Sauron and sacrifice her. I feel like if I hadn’t seen the leaks, then I would be 1000% expecting this to be the outcome. Especially with how Elrond’s theme comes in at the end of The Last Temptation track. He comes upon the confrontation but chooses to do the thing that will harm Sauron in the long run, rather than the thing that will save Galadriel.
I hope so badly for this, but I do worry that it will go the other way. What if it parallels Gandalfanger’s destiny/friend choice, and Elrond chooses her because THAT is how light wins or some shit? Not that this will be a bad scene by any stretch – I love their relationship and want to see their FRIENDSHIP (grrrr) reforged…but, again, the S1 finale! Sauron left her in the water, and Elrond was there to save her.
There’s also Galadriel’s conversation with Adar in the most recent episode – you succumbed, I resisted – but I guess this could go either way? He succumbed, so she resists. She insists she’s able to resist, so she succumbs. URGH. MY HEAD.
There MUST be a difference. SURELY??? Like, this season has been so well written…I just can’t comprehend the copy and paste.
Again, this isn’t anything close to a deal breaker for me. I firmly believe the showrunners when they say this relationship will remain the core of the show, but…hmmm. Okay, on that note…
DAMAGE CONTROL – MOVING ONTO THE DEFENCE OF THE SHOW
So, this is where I want to get into some stuff that I just…don’t agree with that I’ve seen being thrown at the show by shippers. And I’ll reiterate here that I’m truly not telling anybody what to feel. You can hate the show for its choices and feel how you feel. You can express yourself in your social media spaces, and if anybody doesn’t like it they can mute/block/unfollow. This chunk isn’t really aimed at you guys.
This is more for other people like me, because I’m cursed to be somebody that generally wants to just…enjoy things for what they are, while also being susceptible to the mood of others. I want to scroll tags and have a good time, rather than see negativity because it lowers my mood (this isn’t just ship related by the way, I really love this show overall…it’s just this tag that has been impacting my mood most this season). Regardless of the nonsense that might be in episode 7, and even if the finale scene is a repeat of S1, I’m still going to want to focus on enjoying what we get, enjoying the narrative being told etc. So, for those of you that have a little sinking feeling in your gut after the first half of this post, hopefully this second half will help.
This isn’t a ‘typical’ ship. This is a true ENEMIES ARE ENEMIES dynamic where the bad boy is ultimately going to be (is already) pure evil, and where our heroine is the embodiment of light. There are certain things that we just have to accept when it comes to loving this dynamic as part of the show – there will never be another season like season 1. Nor should there be?
Do I wish for s3 to have them in close proximity for at least a few episodes? Of course! Do I think it’s possible with or without finale spoilers? Absolutely (given how quickly characters travel from place to place on this show, they could end the season at opposite ends of Middle Earth and this would still be on the cards…). I’m also anticipating Season 4 as a good time for them to be in full MIND PALACE mode – where the rings are all ringing, but Galadriel hasn’t yet worked out how to shut him out yet. By season 5, there might just be one final scene before the final battle. But, again, I really do think there needs to be a little bit of acceptance of that. Or, at least, expectation of it.
Something I really want to push back against is this idea that Haladriel was baited or teased, but the writers don’t actually care for it. Honestly, that’s nonsense to me on a couple of levels.
First of all, almost EVERY dynamic this season has been reduced to a handful of scenes here and there. The most consistent relationships have probably been Annatar and Celebrimbor, and Durin+Durin+Disa (off the top of my head). Elrond and Durin (probably the other most popular dynamic of S1) have been apart all season, Elrond and Galadriel have too. Isildur popped up to say hello and we might not see him again.
When you actually stop and look at this season…Sauron and Galadriel had to be separated. She could not be anywhere near him while he’s working Celebrimbor, and there’s no world in which they were ever going to change that narrative. And yet, the Sauron and Galadriel dynamic has been consistent across the season. With Galadriel predominantly (and depending on how the finale goes, I may have thoughts on this), but it has also been easier with her because people have talked with her openly about Sauron. It’s been harder on his side, but the fact that Mirdania seems to have been cast to look like Galadriel honestly – right now – feels like it was done with the express purpose of giving Sauron a Galadriel reference.
Again, I’m not saying you have to like the lack of scenes, but it’s not bad writing to respect the overarching narrative of an ensemble show. Galadriel’s season has been all about him, and we’ve had countless insights to make that clear – building up to their final confrontation. If Sauron was running around mentioning Galadriel every five seconds with Celebrimbor or with the dwarves, it would be horrendously out of character.
This next comment is…somewhat dependent on the finale…but as somebody that loves Elendil and Miriel, everything in Numenor has been somewhat crammed in. I would firmly argue that the Galadriel/Sauron dynamic across this season has been treated with care and reverence, all building to a climax designed as the high point of the season. Will we be 100% satisfied? Who can say! But it IS what the season is building to.
I think this brings me around to a particular gripe I have, and maybe the people that believe this came to the show after S1 had fully aired or something…but there’s this idea floating around that the showrunners don’t like this dynamic and are just giving it crumbs to bait people into watching. This makes me want to scream.
These showrunners literally took a few lines about Galadriel being tempted by Sauron and PITCHED THE ENTIRE SHOW OFF OF THAT. The Tolkien estate wasn’t only pitched by Amazon BUT CHOSE THIS PITCH OVER ANYTHING ELSE. Season 1 was written pretty much like a prologue centred around GALADRIEL AND SAURON HAVING A PERSONAL CONNECTION WITH ROMANTIC UNDERTONES…and guess what?
They wrote all that…they filmed ALL THAT…before knowing anything about the audience reaction! That was ALL the showrunners, the writers, the directors, the actors. They ARE the narrative. They are not bait.
Does that mean the fundamentals of their dynamic will always please you, individually? No, of course not. Some people want outright romance, some people want soft Sauron, some people want Dark Galadriel. Will they kiss? I doubt it. Do I wish they would? Sure! Will they be separated again next season? Probably! Will I also wish that they could at least be stuck together for a run of episodes again? Absolutely!
But the idea that any of this is bait, or unimportant to the show drives me a little bit bonkers.
I guess my personal feeling of frustration comes from the fact that I feel so lucky they are exploring this show from the perspective of this dynamic, regardless of specific details/scenes. I’d bet my house (I don’t own a house) that every other pitch hinged on Elendil or Isildur as the protagonists of the show. Now, I love those dudes, but just IMAGINE? The fact that we’re on this path at all is still WILD to me.
ANYWAY, this is what happens when Paulina goes on holiday and I have nobody to ramble too. Sorry for the explosion, but I’ve been dreading the stupid kiss spoiler since I stumbled on it after EPISODE BLOODY 3 and so I needed to vent somewhere.
TL;DR: You are welcome to feel the way you feel, and if you hate everything you go right ahead, but maybe this makes sense to somebody. IDK. IDK.
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ominouspuff · 9 months ago
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Tears on Kamino
CC-2224 didn’t know why the other boy was crying, but he didn’t need to. All he needed to do was pull his fingers over a shaved scalp, slowly so as not to startle, and try not to let on how curious he was to see the way the tears dripped in odd shapes down the hot, red, twisted face.
They were hidden, huddled up together — actually hidden, not just sticking to shadows in the open, because if tears weren’t, the odds were against them that things would get official, and nothing good ever came of something getting official. The closets had no cameras nor microphones, and the one they’d crammed into (seventh basement level, thirty paces from Engineering and the guards at its door) was in disrepair — was in line for being decommissioned, in fact. The Kaminoans were meticulous.
But it wasn’t decommissioned yet, so CC-2224 knew it would be the perfect place the instant that he’d pieced together that his new companion was about three seconds away from bursting into tears. They’d made it to the door in under two, but it had taken a bit of jostling and bony elbows jammed into sensitive places that might’ve accelerated the whole ‘tears’ business. 
They were here now, anyway, and they were safe. CC-2224 considered the maneuver a success.
“Hey,” He said, and it was a useless thing to say but he’d heard that the majority of what was said to crying things was supposed to be useless. Apparently there was something distracting and comforting about just — being chattered to. So CC-2224 did his best. “Our rations are made from bugs. I would’ve guessed fish, but they don’t have the nutrients. Plus fishing is a dignitary sport anyway-”
“Would you - shut up -” The other boy interrupted wetly, heaving with great big breaths that diminished his chest to half its size with every gasp. His face was — if possible — redder than before. His brown eyes were sharp, and they were glaring at CC-2224 from beneath his brows, hardened with a painful-looking panic. “Just- stop talking.”
CC-2224 digested this request (such as it was) in silence, weighing the odds that the boy knew better than he did what was needed. He scrutinized the glare in the dim lighting, but it was clear and steady enough. CC-2224 nodded agreement, lips sealing tight. He kept stroking the shorn head, the space so tight between them that all he had to do was swivel his wrist a little — the boy hadn’t asked him to stop that, and he hoped he wouldn’t think to.
He signed with his free hand instead of speaking, furrowing his brow to clarify it was a question.
The boy’s glare wilted slightly as he focused on tracking the signs. Finally he blew out a shaky gust of air. “CT-7567.” He said, and it was very strange to hear him try to put firmness and confidence into it when he could still barely breathe without hiccuping. “You could tell that by checking my code anyways.” He explained defensively — as if he thought CC-2224 might judge him harshly for revealing it or pounce on some kind of opportunity.
Then again, if CC-2224 hadn’t just dragged them both into a protected space, it would’ve been smart to be suspicious — and he would have had to investigate a bit to find the other boy’s code. Seeing as CC-2224 had done all sorts of helpful stuff, though, the second-guessing was a poor show — one that immediately made CC-2224 that much more certain that CT-7567 had been crying because he was an idiot.
He’d heard that, in some places, ‘idiot’ was just an insult. It wasn’t that way on Kamino. Idiots didn’t last long; the Kaminoans were, after all, meticulous about utility. Closets weren’t the only things getting decommissioned. Pretty common reason to cry as far as CC-2224 figured, and it would explain their current predicament.
It was enough to grim up any vod, but there might be hope yet. 
CC-2224 settled his back against the wall, breathing deeply, and imagined he could see the sim-walls — that he could read the fake mission update on the holo, letters glowing, challenging him to find a way to beat it. (Pretending helped him think faster. Being too confident was a weakness, but if CC-2224 knew anything, it was that he was very good at this.)
There were immediate gaps in information he needed for the mission’s resolution — holes that needed filling before he could pick the next direction. His hand moved almost of its own accord, signing fast and hard. 
CT-7567 watched, his breathing evening out by painful increments, brows furrowed in concentration where another cadet would have followed easily. (CC-2224 held his breath at what that might indicate about CT-7567’s intelligence, and he resisted an urge to suck his teeth.)
“Stop, stop,” CT-7567 finally snapped, flapping a hand right into the middle of the signs. “They haven’t taught us that, yet — I only know pieces. Talk instead.” 
“Oh, good, I thought you were stupid.” CC-2224 said in relief, and startled when the other boy hit him hard on the shoulder. “What? It’s not uncommon. If you had been, you’d be dead soon.” He snapped, narrowing his eyes and leaning backwards.
CT-7567’s red face blanched, both splotchy and pale at once, and CC-2224 nearly got distracted by how different it made him look. Later. He could think about it later, when CT-7567 wasn’t in danger anymore.
“Stop panicking.” CC-2224 said, and it came out a bit nasty, but his shoulder was still aching. CT-7567 hit hard. “What’s your defect?”
CT-7567’s fear turned to outright terror, but they were so far beyond that now it was almost silly to see. CC-2224 was no Kami, nor a Good One — if he had been, he’d have reported CT-7567 from the start just to get an edge.
(Among clones, it was a taboo question. It still got asked, but only as a last resort; usually quietly, to a terrified boy in a corner with several others hemming him in, trapping and shielding all at once. Tell us, the braver ones would say, maybe we can help. 
Sometimes they did help. Other times they made things official. ‘Identifying and reporting issues’ was something high-functioning property was supposed to be good at. They liked how following procedure made things easier for them, and if it didn’t come at the expense of another clone, CC-2224 might not have blamed them.)
CT-7567 stared at him like he’d damned the name of Nala Se herself. But just as CC-2224 was bracing himself to hear something stupid, like ‘what defect?’, CT-7567’s eyes narrowed and his spine straightened and CC-2224 suddenly knew — 
‘Idiot’ wasn’t the defect. The defect wasn’t even in that category. CT-7567 was just smaller than CC-2224 had figured, and there was something more serious going on — something big and obvious and unfixable that made little things helpless the bigger they got, the more it grew, the harder it was to conceal. Helpless vod got desperate, and sometimes acted like idiots, but that didn’t make them one. 
“You’ve got your hand on it.” CT-7567 said cryptically, but blessedly (for the sake of CC-2224’s dwindling patience and proportionally increasing anxiety) followed up with: “My hair. It’s wrong; gets white splotches when it grows.”
Ah. Actually, CC-2224 knew something about things like that. “That why you have it shaved?” He clarified. The buzz felt nice under his fingers.
“Yes.” CT-7567 muttered. “But the splotches are getting bigger.”
Bleaching. CC-2224 knew even more about that, though not from experiencing it personally. 
Bleaching was common. It meant that hair began to lighten in odd places or patterns — usually before maturity, but some unfortunates were late bloomers.
CC-2224 had once caught a glimpse of a fully fledged CT being transferred on a hover bed to decommissioning, hair speckled with white. It had been a shock to realize it could happen that late — that they couldn’t be sure they were safe, even after maturing.
There were some solutions he knew of already, but they were difficult, and resources limited. Even the best ones relied on luck so heavily that CC-2224’s nose wrinkled, and he bent himself to the task of thinking up other solutions. 
Five minutes of silence and thoughts and buzz beneath his fingertips ticked by before CT-7567 brought CC-2224’s awareness abruptly back into the closet. 
“Your fingers are trembling.” He said, so much steadier now — maybe because he was focusing on someone else’s problem. CC-2224 knew the feeling well; if a clone wasn’t careful, they could get obsessed with it, to the point they forgot to take care of their own business entirely — and that ended in death too, of one sort or another.
“They do that,” He said distractedly, stifling the spark of irritation that being interrupted ignited in his chest — like a petty little mouth full of sharp teeth, nipping at his ribs. He focused on the buzz beneath his fingers. “They do it when I’m thinking. I like solving problems.”
“Oh.” There was a lot in that ‘oh’, but CC-2224 couldn’t spare much brainpower to track it — he was using it on other things. Then, after a pause, CT-7567 quietly said: “Thank you.”
“Haven’t solved anything yet. Thank me when I do.” CC-2224 pointed out — this time with significant impatience at being interrupted — and CT-7567 grunted in acknowledgement of the wisdom behind that, at least.
CC-2224 thought harder, holding his jaw carefully loose so he wouldn’t chew his lip. The silence stuffed his ears full, and he danced from idea to problem, from solution to unexpected flaw, until there were no more flaws and his lip hurt because he’d forgotten not to chew it.
The closet came back into clarity, and CC-2224 stilled his shaking hand. He couldn’t quite contain his grin, though. “Got it.” He said — and because he really did have it, he let his pride show. With luck, it would help reassure CT-7567 it was true, and he’d be confident instead of second-guessing everything. “C’mon. We’re going to need a few things.”
They spent the next few minutes trying to do damage-control on CT-7567’s unbelievably splotched face. 
CC-2224 donated his socks to the cause, wetting them in the sanitization pump (it leaked on his bare feet, but he offered that up as a painful necessity), and wiping the tears away methodically. CT-7567 bore it stoically, every ounce of his will bent on forestalling more tears — and he managed it. His skin went back to normal and his pinkish eyes cleared up. They couldn’t help the swelling of his lids and nose, but that was a manageable risk.
CC-2224 did some rinsing and ringing out, then put his slightly soggy socks back on, sealing his boots up just as he would for a dry pair, already resigned to the blisters. CT-7567 dithered a bit, watching with a distracted nervousness and looking ready to suggest they wait out the swelling too, but wisely thinking better of it. They’d been in the closet for fifteen minutes already; any longer would definitely be too much of a risk for being noticed.
“On me.” CC-2224 said authoritatively once he was done with his boots, and at first it felt silly to include the other boy in pretending, but CT-7567 straightened and took it seriously and calmed in an instant, and CC-2224 felt vindicated that he’d guessed the right approach — that he wasn’t the only one who liked this tactic. 
“Sir yessir.” CT-7567 said — and the unexpected honorific hit CC-2224 like a battering ram. 
It felt — Bad. Strange. His mouth dried, and he blinked slower so he could hide a moment in the black behind his lids. 
Mission, they were on a mission, and CC-2224 was a commander, like he was supposed to be. He needed his brain working fast and his CT obeying faster, if this was going to work. 
“Let’s go.” He croaked, a bit hoarse, a bit excited. (His hands still trembled a bit when he opened the door.)
120 notes · View notes
yeollie-plz · 2 years ago
Text
I Got You
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Javier Pena x Plus Sized! F! Reader
Synopsis: Javier teaches you how to be confident. AKA Javier teaches you a lot of things…
Genre: Fluff, angst, AND smut!
Warnings: 18+, anxiety, problems with self confidence, reader insert (Y/N), smut, fingering, oral (female receiving), drinking, thigh riding, kissing, making out, cursing, reader gets soaked (in many ways)
Gif credits to owners!
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This is a requested fic by a very lovely anon that sent me a DM. They were super sweet! I hope this is everything you wanted and you enjoy it! I also wish you all the happiness! Thank you! <3
P.S. I’m thinking there will be a part two to this but I’m not 100% yet. Lmk your opinions!
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When you met Javier, you never knew how much he would end up meaning to you. In your eyes he was this handsome guy in tight (very tight) pants just lending you a hand. No actually, he had his hand held out to you to help you up. You took it with red cheeks and a shaky hand, muttering a thank you.
He smiled, "No problem, you okay?"
A nod was the only reply you could muster. Not only were you already embarrassed but there was something about the sun kissed glow of his skin that just had you blushing.
"Well, I'm actually supposed to be chasing the guy that knocked you over, so I gotta go." He said all too quickly and rushed off.
After a few days, you had convinced yourself that you were imagining the event all together. A product of watching too many rom coms, you had deducted. Nothing more.
That was until he walked into your favorite coffee shop and you knew you had not made it or him up. You followed him with your eyes as he ordered. He turned to scan the room, his orbs landing on yours. His head quirked to the side as a smile danced on his lips. Suddenly he turned at the sound of the barista calling something out. He grabbed his coffee from her with a nod and turned back to you.
He made his way over to the table you were at and took a seat.
"Hi again." He said while taking a long sip from his coffee. It was probably hot too...
"H-Hi."
"I hope this is okay, me sitting here I mean. No other tables were available so."
You glanced around, there was at least five tables open. Your brows furrowed, "Um, sure, I don't mind."
He took another drink from his coffee, making a sound of content at the taste.
"Wanna go out with me tonight?" He said after a few seconds of silence.
"What?" You weren't sure you heard him right. He wanted to go out with you?
"Do you want to go out with me tonight? Dinner? Maybe dancing?" He clarified. You did hear him right.
"Um, I don't really dance."
"I'll show you, believe it or not I’m a pretty good dancer.” He said, swaying his hips slightly. It all looked pretty awkward, seeing as he was sitting down. You quirked a brow at his movements.
“I believe it. I just-“ You started, only to be cut off.
“Great! I’ll see you at the place next door to here at 7.” He got up abruptly, taking his coffee with him.
He just turned around when he seemed to remember something, “Oh! I’m Javier by the way.”
“Y/N.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N.” You sat there stunned by the conversation. The only thing you heard was the bell over the door ringing as Javier left.
Javier…
—————— Five Months Later ——————
You were lounging on Javier’s couch, yelling throughout his place as he got ready for some work event.
“Are you sure you don’t wanna come with?” He yelled from his bedroom.
“Javi…I can’t come, you know that.”
“You just don’t want to come.” Emerging from his bedroom, wearing a pink button down. He gestured to the shirt questioningly, you nodded in approval.
He made his way to the couch, lifting your legs so he could place them on his lap.
“You know why I don’t want to go.” You said while looking down at your hands.
“Hermosa…” There was a sort of pleading in his voice.
“Javier…” You pleaded back. There was almost a threat in your voice.
“Fine, then I am staying as well. I’d much rather be on this couch with you anyways.”
“You have to go, it’s for work. Besides there might be a beautiful lady you can take home there.” You said with a shrug. Although, you liked Javier the two of you were never going to be more than friends.
You didn’t think he would ever like you. How could he? You were you. It hurt, of course especially because you were all but in love with Javier Peña. But again you were you and someone like Javier would not like someone like you.
He was experienced, you were not. He was confident, you were not. He was fit, you were…not…
He had a type and you did not fit that type.
“I should go, let you get to your party.” You said with a hint of sadness, your thoughts sinking into you. Lifting yourself off the couch, you headed to the door.
“I like you.” Javier bursted out. You turned almost too quickly at his words. He was avoiding your gaze, pretending to be interested in his hands.
“You what?”
“I like you. I like you a lot actually. Maybe too much.” Finally he met your eyes.
You scoffed, “No, no you don’t.”
“Yes I do.” He said matter-of-factly. Javier rose from the couch and crossed the room to you. Grabbing your hand, he brought it up to his heart.
“Feel that? It’s racing, that’s how it always is when I’m around you. It started the moment I met you and hasn’t stopped since. My heart beats for you.” He was right, his heart was racing.
“Javier…” His name left your lips in almost a whisper.
“Y/N…”
Your eyes met, “I can’t.”
And you ran.
You kept running until you found yourself at the spot you met Javier at. It was only then that you sunk to the ground and began to cry.
It didn’t take long for Javier to find you there. You didn’t notice him at first until he held out his hand to you.
Tears streaming down your face, you slowly looked up at him.
“Can we please talk?” He pleaded with you.
You took his hand and let him help you up.
“Let me talk,” you started, “How? How could you like me? I’m no where even close to your league. I’m a virgin! I look like this for gods sake!”
“You look perfect.” Javier tried to reassure you as he reached for your hand. You denied him, stepping back.
“I do not.”
“You do. And being a virgin, well that’s an easy fix.” He said with a smirk. You couldn’t help the blush that rose to your cheeks.
“But what about all the girls you are with all the time?”
He chuckled, “I haven’t seen any of them in months, basically since I met you.”
“But-“
“No buts, let me show you how much you mean to me. Come home with me?” He held out his hand to you once again.
“I’m not…I don’t think I’m ready for that.” You shook your head and took his hand.
“That’s okay, we can take it slow. Everything is on your timeline. But let me lead? It’ll be like when I taught you to dance, I’ll teach you to love yourself. I'll teach you to see yourself, the way that I see you. I got you.” His eyes bore into you, you nodded.
—————— One Month Later ——————
In the one month that Javier and you had been dating, he had taken you on a date almost everyday. He would do at least one thing each day to ease yourself into confidence.
Today he had decided to take you shopping, he wanted you to find a new dress to go dancing in. Dancing had become a very common date activity for the two of you. It brought you out of your shell and gave Javier an excuse to have his hands all over you.
You were struggling with picking a dress though. You had brought a few into the dressing room and each didn’t sit right. Pulling at the fabric of the latest one, you sighed.
“Amor, come out. Let me see.” You heard from the other side of the curtain.
“No, I don’t like it, it doesn’t look good.” You stared at your reflection. In retrospect the dress would look good, it hugged every curve and pushed your boobs up. It was just you. The dress did not work on you. If you had lost a few pounds maybe…
All of a sudden the curtain was opened and Javier slid into the dressing room.
“Holy shit, you look amazing. This dress is…wow.” Javier was awestruck.
You rolled your eyes, “I look like a sack of potatoes.”
“And oh how delicious you are.” He replies with a smirk, capturing your lips with his own.
You and Javier had kissed already. You’ve even made out a few times, done a little over the clothes groping but you were still not at a fully sexual point yet. You were still nervous.
The kiss was feverish, like the two of you were starving for it. Teeth clashing and tongues molding together. Javier’s hands found your ass and squeezed causing you to yelp.
“I want to taste you.” He said against your lips.
“Aren’t you already?”
“I want to taste,” he glanced down, “all of you.”
It took a few seconds for you to understand what he meant until you felt his hard on against your thigh.
“Oh.” You said in realization.
“Oh?” He replied with a raise of his brows.
“I think I would like that.”
Javier smirked placing one last kiss to your lips before falling to his knees. Pushing the dress up past the swell of your ass. He marveled at your underwear choice. Although not the sexiest, they were a bit lacey.
“Fuck, it’s like you knew what was going to happen today.”
He ran his fingertips up the inside of your thigh, slipping a finger under the crotch of your panties, feeling your wetness.
“You’re soaked. Why haven’t you told me how much I effect you?”
You shrugged in response, “I’m still nervous about it all.”
“You have nothing to be nervous about. I got you.”
Suddenly he pulled down your panties and took in all of your naked form, well half naked. Not wasting any time, he licked a strip along your core causing you to gasp. It was a newfound pleasure. Of course you had touched yourself before but nothing compared to someone else, especially someone’s tongue.
Javier seemed content with your reaction and continued to slowly tease you with his tongue. Each stroke of his muscle causing you to react. The teasing was almost too much, you needed more. You let your hips grind down onto his mouth.
“Mmm baby, yes grind on my tongue. Show me how good I make you feel.” His words made you moan.
“Oh but keep quiet, don’t forget we are in public.”
Right, you were in public. You were being ate out for the first time…in public. Holy shit. It was kind of hot actually.
You quickly forgot about the fact that anyone could hear or find the two of you and focus on the intense pleasure Javier was giving you. He had started to move his tongue faster, swirling his tongue in circles every few licks.
At this point you were keening, struggling to keep yourself on your feet. Javier moved his hand to the backside of your thigh and lifted it over his shoulder, supporting you with his body and giving you more balance. This also caused his tongue to hit a new angle, you let a moan pass your lips. Your hand slapped over your mouth.
You saw Javier’s eyes glance up at you and you swore you saw someone flash behind them.
“Can I use my fingers?” At this point you were far past the nerves and logic, so you nodded instantly.
The hand that wasn’t supporting your thigh grabbed your hip and squeezed before trailing down to where his mouth was. He pulled off only to gain a whine from you. He laughed and ran his finger along your entrance. Slowly he inserted that finger. You gasped.
“Please, Javi, I need more.”
That was all Javier needed to hear to fully let himself go. He began pumping his finger in and out of you, hitting the perfect spot inside of you. He added another finger to the mix and quickened his pace slightly. Bringing his lips back to your clit he sucked the bud in before letting it go with a pop. His tongue was now on you again. At this point your knees were shaking. He moved his tongue in time with his thrusts.
“I’m-I’m gonna” You began to say but couldn’t finish as blinding white pleasure crashed over you. Your entire body shook with the force of your orgasm. Never have you felt something so good. No time you touched yourself was it ever this amazing.
Javier worked you through your orgasm, it wasn’t until you whimpered that he let up. He stood and brought his lips to yours once again.
“That was…oh my…”
He smiled and pecked your lips.
“I’m glad it was good. Now you better get that dress.”
Ever since that day in the dressing room, Javier has been even more attached to you. Complimenting you every chance he gets, always needing to be touching you in some way, he was obsessed. A part of you was beginning to accept that this was more than another score for Javier. He actually liked you...maybe even love...no. Nope, there was no way. Javier would never love someone like you, he was too...Javier.
Tonight, you and Javier were going to meet his partner, Steve, and his wife, Connie, for a little dinner double date. You were beyond nervous. You had met Steve in passing a few times but now the situation was different. You and Javier were together, what would he think? And not to mention Connie, you had never met her.
Javi tried to reassure you numerous times. He said they would love you and that he didn't care if they didn't anyways, but it all still gnawed in the back of your head.
There was a knock at your door, it was Javier. You did one more once over in the mirror, tilting your head at your appearance. You were wearing the dress, it felt wrong to put it back after such a sin was committed in it. Plus, Javier liked it so much you couldn't say no. Lightly pushing a piece of hair back into place, you decided that this was as good as it was going to get and made your way to the door.
Javier stood leaning against the doorframe, a single rose in this hand.
"Cariño, if I knew you were gonna wear this, I would've planned for us to stay in tonight." He was mesmerized by your appearance. You blushed instantly, looking down at your feet.
"I think we cancel, I wanna keep you all to myself." Javi tried to push himself into your apartment, you placed your hand on his chest to stop his movements.
"Javier, we have to go. How would I look if we were to cancel on them?"
He sighed, "We could make up a really good excuse! But fine, you're right," He handed you the rose. "But if anyone even looks at you, I'm taking you straight home."
You rolled your eyes at his antics and took the rose, admiring it. You knew no one would even glance your way but your heart swelled at his...was it jealousy...?
Arriving at the restaurant, you were greeted by Steve and Connie who had already arrived and claimed a table for the four of you. You tried to put on your most confident smile as Javier introduced you to them.
Although you and Javier hadn't had the official talk of what you were to each other, a piece of you wished he called you his girlfriend. Instead you were just Y/N to him.
The conversation was light as you all decided what to order. Connie recommended a cocktail to you and you ended up ordering it. After the server left with your orders, Connie asked how the two of you met.
Javier laughed as he told the story of a perp knocking you over and him becoming your "knight in shining armor." His words, not yours. That seemed to break the tension you had stored up as you laughed along with him. Connie was also laughing at the dramatics of Javier's storytelling. Steve had a big smile on his face that he was trying to hide with his hand.
The rest of the evening went smoothly, all of you talking about anything and everything. You were relieved with how well it was going, the food was also delicious.
The night was winding down and Javier was now three drinks in and little tipsy. You had stopped at one, but not only did he have a higher tolerance...he also had a bit of an addiction. Not that you minded, you just knew he got very handsy when he has been drinking.
As if you were manifesting it, Javier's right hand had made it onto your thigh. He was rubbing soft circles into your flesh.
You would've brushed it off but his pinky was getting dangerously close to your center. Clearing your throat you stood, Javier's hand fell from your thigh.
"I'm just going to use the restroom really quickly. Be right back." You shot Javier a warning glance as you walked towards the bathroom.
You had finished your business and were now washing your hands when you heard the door opening. You didn't look over, assuming it was just another person needing to use the bathroom, until you heard the lock click. Thats when your eyes snapped up, meeting Javier's.
"Javi...what are you doing in here?" You whisper-yelled at him.
"No need to get nervous, amor, I needed to see you in private. You've been driving me crazy all night." He sauntered towards you, you made note of the slight stagger in his steps.
"You've been drinking. I need to take you home." You said as you side stepped his advances.
"I only had three and I want you." Stepping towards you once again.
"You can have me when you're sober." You bopped his nose and made your way to the door, only to be stopped by Javier placing his hand over the lock. His other was trapping your body. You turned around to face him, raising a brow.
"Please just kiss me." He wasn't asking, he was almost begging.
You gave in and pressed your lips to his. Javier melted against you. His hands fell to your hips and guided you to the counter. Where he started to mess with the hem of your dress. You let this go on for a bit before pulling away when he started to pull it upwards.
"Uh uh, you said a kiss. Your partner and his wife are waiting for us."
"Please, I'm sure they are about to do the same thing. Steve's been eye fucking Connie all night long." Javier rolled his eyes and tried to bring your body back to his.
"I did not need that image." He laughed. "Can't we just go home? We can cuddle and maybe a little more there." Your voice was laced with the innuendo.
"Fine, but only 'cause I'm pretty sure I saw the bartender looking at your ass."
You two paid and bid your goodbyes to Steve and Connie. Making your short walk back to Javier's place. As you were walking the streets of Colombia, raindrops began to fall on you.
"It starting to rain." You pointed out. Javier released his hand from yours and lifted them to the sky, trying to feel the rain. He nodded.
"We better hurry home then." And right as he finished his sentence, it began to pour. Javier grabbed your hand and dragged you into a run to his front entrance.
Finally you two entered his place, now soaking wet. He lifted his shirt over his head, muttering something about needing it off. You marveled at his tanned form. This wasn't the first time you had seen him shirtless, but now there was a new fire inside of you.
He seemed to notice you staring and smirked at you. But that quickly faded as he noticed you shivering.
"Let me get you a towel and some dry clothes." He left down the hallway, leaving you to drip in the entryway. Javier returned with a towel and a t-shirt.
"Here, I'll let you change, be right back." You accepted the items graciously and started to dry your hair with the towel.
After you were sure he was gone, you peeled the drenched dress from your skin and slipped into Javier's t-shirt. You brought the collar to your nose and inhaled, it smelt like him. You smiled.
His footsteps were heard coming down the hall and he rounded the corner with fresh, dry clothes. Including a very revealing pair of gray sweatpants. This is when you realized the draw of a gray sweatpant, you could see everything. You were now wet for an entirely different reason.
"Damn, the rain really sobered me up." You snapped out of your day dream just as Javier slumped down onto the couch.
You don't know what came over but you crossed the room to the couch and straddled Javier's hips. He blinked at you in surprise, but he gladly accepted the intrusion of personal space.
"What are you doing, sweetie?" He questioned.
"Don't know, just need you." You didn't wait for a reply and leaned fully into him, capturing his lips with your own.
Now you were the one who just needed to kiss him. He moaned into the kiss. The sound caused you to grind down into him, feeling him harden.
His hands were gripping your hips and leading your motions against him. Keeping up the friction, the two of you were lost in the kiss, that was getting more and more deep as it went on.
Nothing but lust filled the air as the two of you kept up the heated make out. One of his hands reached between your thighs and ghosted over your clit, causing you to gasp. This let him slip his tongue past your open lips, fighting for dominance with yours.
“Naughty girl not wearing any panties.” He said into your lips.
“They got all wet.” You tried to defend yourself. You tell he was holding back the innuendo that was on his mind before he brought your lips back together.
The hand that was teasing your clit, reached up to your jaw and pulled your face from his. You looked confusedly at him.
“I want to try something. Do you trust me?”
“Of course I trust you.”
“Good, I want you to ride my thigh.” He said while looking into your eyes, trying to read them.
A few thoughts flashed through your head as you processed his request.
You couldn’t muster anything out but a, “Are you sure?”
He nodded, “I got you.”
He helped you shift your body so that you were now straddling only one of his thighs.
“Just grind on me like you were before, baby. Use me to get yourself off.” His eyes were filled with lust. He sure did like pleasing a woman.
You nodded and leaned back into his lips. As the kiss heated up again, you didn’t even need to think about it, your hips started moving on their own. Grinding your clit down into the fabric of his sweatpants. The texture causing you to moan into Javier’s mouth.
“That’s right baby, use my thigh.” He broke the kiss to trail his lips down the expanse of your neck. He attached his teeth and sucked, you knew there would be a mark (or a few) the next day but you didn’t care.
His mouth pulled off your neck with a pop. He admired his work before looking at your blissed out face. He watched as your hips slowed a little as you lost your rhythm.
Javier’s hands returned to your waist to help you back into a pattern. He rocked your body back and forth and watched as you fell apart on top of him. He thanked whatever god brought you to him.
As you got closer and closer to your release, it got harder to focus. Not even Javier’s guidance was helping to you to keep up.
He must has sensed your distress and brought his lips back to yours and his thumb back to your clit. He worked the hud as he worked your mouth.
The kiss was slower now as he was more concentrated on getting you to your finish line. His thumb moving expertly against your clit, rubbing it in circles. The perfect speed and pressure.
You threw you head back, breaking the kiss.
“I’m so close. Please…”
He rubbed you quicker and right as you were about to tip over the edge he pulled your hips back down onto his thigh. His hands helping to get your hips back into motion. Even with how muddled your brain was, you knew what you body needed and you ground into him.
He flexed his thigh to give you more pressure. This action and rubbing your clit one last time at just the right angle, sent you into an intense orgasm. Your hips moved faster and faster as you worked through it. Javier’s hands kneaded your breasts lightly as he watched you fall apart.
As your breathing evened out, Javier spoke up. “Was it good, mi amor?”
You could only form a drunk after orgasm nod as a response. He smiled and kissed your forehead. Slowly he lifted you off his thigh and placed you onto the couch.
“Now I need a new pair of pants again.” He chuckled, noticing the huge wet spot that now adorned them. He began to lift himself off the couch before you spook up.
“Javi…what are we?” He looked over at your blissed out face.
“We are whatever you want us to be, hermosa.”
“I want to be yours.”
“Then you are mine.” He stood over you, using the back of the couch to support his weight.
“I want all of you.” This could be the orgasm talking but you had let it slip out and there was no going back.
“In due time. Right now, I’m going to put you to bed. We had a long night.” He pecked your lips and lifted his body to an upright position.
Javier leant his hand out to you, you took it. A knowing smile on both of your faces.
“I got you. Forever and always.”
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scarletcomalies · 2 years ago
Text
broken reflection
Wanda Maximoff x Fem Reader
Word count: 5,342
A/N: This story is inspired by Elizabeth Olsen's character in Love And Death. However, I must clarify that while I appreciate her performance in the show, I don’t agree with nor glorify the actions of the real-life person she portrays, Candy Montgomery. Therefore, I made the decision to switch the character to Wanda Maximoff and create a “multiverse” storyline. I was inspired by someone else who did a similar switch, and I felt that it was the right decision for my own. With nothing else to add, I hope you enjoy!
Marriage was supposed to be your happy ending, but as your marriage deteriorated, an encounter with another woman opened your eyes to a new world of possibilities and desires you never knew existed.
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Time seemed to pass at a frantic pace whenever you found yourself immersed in your most tormenting thoughts. The ceiling, which you watched as you lay in your bed, became your silent witness, as the moonlight streaming in through the window illuminated the cracks in the ceiling, which you could have sworn, you knew by heart by that point.
You caught yourself finding comfort in those seemingly insignificant details, but at that moment, they seemed to be the only tangible things in your life.
Because, no one had prepared you for this.
For as long as you could remember, the idea of marriage had been presented to you as something wonderful, as a kind of destiny that you had to reach in order to be happy and fulfilled. And very late you realized that, in your quest to find that sense of belonging and fulfillment you so longed for, you had fallen into the error of looking for in marriage what you should have found within yourself.
"I worked my ass off to give you everything you needed, I spoiled you rotten, and the one thing you were supposed to give me in return, you couldn't give it to me!" He exclaimed when he came home from work at nine o'clock at night, and you found yourself in the painful position of telling him again that no, you were not in the mood to try.
He had never told you anything like that, at least not explicitly. However, he always let you know by giving you those little looks whenever he saw those happy families with their children in the park, or disguised as a brief "we're working on it" whenever the subject came up in those absurd after-dinner conversations he made you attend. He never felt the need to say those hurtful words to you, until that time.
You could hear your mother's voice echoing in your head, "That's what you get for marrying so young, to someone so old." And yes, you were the youngest of all the wives who gathered after church on Sundays. From the way they talked to you, it was obvious that they thought you were so ignorant of everything just because you were young.
Before, every day of your marriage felt like a fairy tale, everything seemed solved, and you thought you had fulfilled your purpose. It wasn't until, for a change, some idiot friend of James' decided to pick on him by telling him that he was "falling behind."
What hurt the most was that he was looking for in children what you were looking for in marriage, both wrong because, you insisted, it was within you. That was why you refused to even try, in the first place. Being a father wasn't supposed to be just a compensation for his lack of fulfillment.
After failing miserably to go to sleep at a decent hour, you woke up at noon and realized that he was gone. It wasn't the first time he had breakfast out because you simply refused to wake up to prepare him something. The only reason it didn't bother him was because afterward, he took advantage to see other women. Oh, you knew, he didn't even deign to hide it.
Even if you weren't doing the same thing, you supposed you could care less anyway. Any semblance of love had vanished so long ago, but you couldn't afford to be as bold as he was, because you repeated, you were doing the same thing, seeing other women...
... or rather, another woman.
It all happened when one Sunday night, which you thought would end up as hell, was what started a part of your life that really meant something. Very chaotic and perhaps sick to consider it as such, but all you aspired to was those weekday evenings. Before, you had nothing to aspire to, no one you really wanted to give yourself to in that sense.
For a change, you were fighting with your husband. You were eagerly talking to the women about everything and nothing at the same time when he called you over to talk, and his expression was so serene that it was inevitable to think it was not good.
"You'll be happy now! I'm the laughing stock of all my friends because they know we are not even trying to have a child," he blurted out, his alcohol breath invading your nose, causing you a feeling of revulsion immediately.
"How fragile you are to accept a commitment as big as a child is, just because you can't stand the awful comments," you replied, almost in a mocking tone. He hated that, he hated that you seconded all the remarks in some way. His friends teased him because you refused to sleep with him, and you teased him because he cared. It was his nightmare and your delight.
"Not everything is about having kids! They know you're disgusted by me!" He clarified, and just imagining the kind of conversations they were having made you loathe him even more.
"We women are not trophies for you to show off. We are human beings," you replied, pushing him slightly, which was enough for him to fall like a sack of potatoes. "How empty-minded are you guys that the only remarkable thing you have to say is whether or not you slept with a woman, huh?"
He stood up awkwardly and laughed.
"Spare me your feminist talk, I'm outta here," he growled and proceeded to walk off to who knows where.
You let out a long sigh after watching his figure shrink in size until he became invisible to your eyes. Every time he was gone, you felt free. It was as if all your problems disappeared in the form of a loathsome person like he was.
You felt even too guilty because that day you wished he would dawn lost somewhere and never find his way back or have a horrible accident.
"What you said is too true," you heard a voice behind you, making you startle.
You looked around until you came upon Wanda in the driver's seat of her car, with the window open. You were so immersed in your discussion that you didn't even notice that she had been listening to everything.
"I'm sorry you had to witness this," you muttered, lowering your head.
"You know, I always thought of you as a naive girl who doesn't have a fucking clue, but I realize you have guts. Even more than many in there," she ignored your apology, and at her statement, you didn't know whether to be flattered or offended.
"I guess it only takes being ten years younger than you for you to condemn me like that," you shrugged, opting to feel satisfied. This was a great opportunity to prove yourself wrong.
"What are you talking about? That's a lifetime!" She exclaimed as she laughed. You really appreciated that she decided to lighten up what could have been another argument with a little joke, where she made fun of her own mistake. That definitely marked a before and after between you two.
"You're right, you were all here by the time Queen Elizabeth was born," you joked back, causing her to let out a loud laugh that even echoed throughout the neighborhood. It was her reaction that made you laugh even harder.
That day, she asked you to go with her in the car and get lost around the neighborhood. It was almost like a therapeutic session; she talked about her husband, and you talked about yours. You made them the biggest targets of ridicule and insults for maybe three hours, and only stopped when you went to a gas station store to buy snacks and subsequently find a spot in a parking lot on top of a building.
"Don't you sometimes wish you had met other people?" you concluded, as she finished telling you how her husband responded to a piece she wrote. With such indifference that it made you feel extremely indignant.
"All the time," she confirmed, nodding. "Sometimes I imagine what my life would have been like if I had married someone who cared about my mind and not my uterus, and who treats me like a diamond in the rough that values at all times, and not like a trophy that just shows off but leaves to rest in some closet as soon as everyone is gone."
"That's me!" you laughed, placing your hand above hers to squeeze it, as a sign of comfort.
"But I do have a better proposition for you, why don't you start by doing it yourself? Prove to yourself that you're more than what your stupid husband thinks you are, and maybe that will even give you the courage to walk away from him if that's what you want."
You felt a mixture of fear and excitement at the idea. Could you really do it? Would you be able to find the strength to stand on your own two feet and figure out what are your own dreams, even if it meant abandoning the security of your marriage?
You looked at her, who was smiling encouragingly at you, and you felt a surge of gratitude for the moment you shared. Maybe it was time to take a chance and see what else life had to offer.
"...Wow! Such wonderful words were not rehearsed before? You're a natural," you praised her. She blushed slightly at that. "Keep in mind that I'll think about it carefully."
"Think about it! Besides, my husband is an idiot and your husband is an idiot, what would you say if... we found that courage between us? That way maybe we won't settle for less," her voice became raspy in a matter of seconds, as she leaned towards you.
"Oh, sure! Keep in mind that I'm willing to support you...-"
"Look, regardless of that silly prejudice I had about you, when we were playing volleyball, and the sweat was running down your tight blouse... oh, you have no idea what it provoked inside me," she confessed. "Today when I saw you put that fucker in his place, I realized, I'm incredibly attracted to you."
You watched her for a moment, and noticed how her green eyes turned dark. Who were you kidding? If you didn't want James to lay a finger on you it was because it was women like Wanda that you coveted with your being to do whatever they wanted with you.
"I'm not going to lie to you, I was only going to volleyball to see you," you whispered, as if you weren't the only souls in that compound.
You weren't lying. You weren't a big fan of going to physically exhaust yourself after the mental exhaustion that being under the same roof as that disgusting man brought you. However, the mere thought of Wanda being there made you become the most passionate athlete.
"Would you be interested in having an affair?" She inquired without preamble.
Every day used to feel like a cycle of dreary routines from which you could find no escape, leaving you with a sense of longing for something different to shake up your existence. You never imagined, however, that said "something" would be an affair with Wanda Maximoff.
Instead, you adopted an exciting routine that was previously calculated, in order to be able to get away with it, and so far, not a soul suspected you.
However, you were also highly involved in the delight of each other's company, so there was no danger in going to the movies, shopping, visiting each other at home to simply read together, or sharing a lunch.
You hoped that, like you, Wanda would also feel that your presence had irrevocably improved her life, for it was evident that you found in her what you knew you would never find in anyone else.
And so the sleepless nights had become somewhat more frequent than usual. They were minutes turning into hours, until the light of a new dawn appeared through the windows of the room.
Your thoughts were mainly shaped by the failure of your marriage, which there was no longer any point in fighting to save, and how it all led to an affair whose most essential rule you had broken: don't fall in love.
Fortunately, you would fall asleep after your idiot husband left the bed and his scent gradually faded away. It was during those nights that you longed to find yourself on Wanda's chest instead, with her intoxicating scent invading your nostrils. For you, it was one of the most effective ways for you to sleep.
"Who is this?" You groaned, after the ringing of the phone had woken you from your slumber. It was when you saw the clock hanging on the wall that you realized it was four-thirty in the afternoon.
"Your mistress," Wanda laughed on the other end of the phone, replacing annoyance with a feeling of happiness that only she knew how to bring.
The more you fell in love with her, the more you knew this was doomed to fail. You could feel the impending apocalypse, the moment when she would break your heart because you were asking for too much. She was the only solace in a world that had lost all meaning, and you refused to lose her.
"Oh," You replied with a chuckle. "Are there plans for today?"
"I'm too excited to see the new Star Wars movie, and I was wondering if you'd like to go watch it with me," she proposed. "I know we went to the movies recently, but I really hope you don't mind..."
"Yes! You'd love to go with you," You exclaimed, with a huge smile plastered on your face. "If you want to go to the movies a thousand times, a thousand times I'll go with you."
"Yay, perfect! I'll pick you up in an hour and a half," she anticipated you. "See you then."
As soon as you hung up the phone, you set about taking a shower, putting on an outfit and applying makeup that would leave you sufficiently satisfied with your appearance. In a matter of effectively an hour, you were fully ready.
You were putting away the mess you had left behind when you heard your doorbell ring, and with great joy, you ran to the front door.
There she was, with a smile even bigger than yours, and she didn't hesitate for a second to throw herself at you and hug you warmly.
"You look beautiful," You complimented her, appreciating her green orbs and full lips that once kissed every inch of your being.
With a slight blush on her cheeks, she looked around, then grabbed the back of your neck and kissed your lips.
As if it was the first time ever, the softness of her lips against yours was an indescribable sensation that never failed to make you melt by her touch and surrender to her.
"And you look divine," she whispered, a few millimeters away, causing you to feel her hot breath as if it were your own.
When you finally broke apart, you were both breathless and flushed. You looked into her eyes and she returned your gaze with a look that was a mixture of passion and maybe, just maybe, a reciprocated feeling of love.
***
"Have you eaten yet, darling?" she asked, once you stopped in front of the cinema, whose line was somewhat extensive.
One thing you greatly appreciated was that concern which was represented through small actions, as in this case, they were questions of whether you had eaten, and at other times they regarded your sleeping habits or whether you had eaten something really healthy and not just fast food from some restaurant nearby. These were acts that may have been automatic and even inert to her, but to you they meant the world.
"I know that tone you take when you've just woken up," she began, referring to the way you answered the phone. "And since I only gave you an hour's notice, I guess you didn't get to eat."
You laughed at her conclusion, which completely evidenced how well she knew you and how interested she seemed in you, "You got me, but it's okay, popcorn will do."
"Not a chance," she countered, predictably. "Let's get you something to eat, and we'll smuggle it into the cinema to make it more fun," she proposed.
You nodded, knowing that she always found ways to make any situation more exciting.
Together you headed towards a small food stall near the cinema, and as you waited for your order, you couldn't help but feel grateful to have someone so thoughtful and considerate by your side.
Once your plates of food were delivered, you took care to hide them appropriately in your respective bags, and, after purchasing your tickets and popcorn, you proceeded to walk towards the cinema, completely satisfied with your successful smuggling.
Finally, you found your seats in the darkness of the theatre, surrounded by the fragrance of corn and butter. You looked to your side and saw Wanda already looking in your direction. It was there that you confirmed once again that the movie didn't matter as much as the fact that you were there together, sharing a fun moment where you could escape for a brief moment.
The film turned out to be shocking in every way.
From the very beginning, it kept you on the edge of your nerves with its intense and exciting plot. The pace of the film gradually picked up and the tension built up. The scenes were shocking and you were holding each other's hands tightly.
It was then that the unexpected plot twist occurred that left you gasping.
The iconic "I am your father" stunned everyone, especially the woman next to you, who was perhaps the biggest fan of the franchise in this room.
"No way," she whispered, and you noticed her eyes watering. "There is no way!"
You couldn't lie, you were just as surprised. Even though it all started as a way to keep Wanda company, you couldn't help but feel moved. You could say you were even beginning to understand what all the fuss was about.
Once the film was over, she stared into the void for a long time, still processing what had happened.
"Do you want me to drive?" You proposed, somewhat amused at her state, but also willing to help and understand her.
"No no, I'm fine, come on! I'm not a teenager!" She shook her head, heading for the passenger door and opening it for you - a gesture you adored.
"Thank you, ma'am," You thanked her, getting into the car. Once she made her way to the driver's seat, you decided to comfort her a little. "Sometimes you're a teenager... sometimes we are. I think growing up is overrated."
She took your hand in hers, and kissed it affectionately, "I wish it was like that all the time and not sometimes; I wish all the time I could have exciting experiences that constantly make me feel on top of the world. I wish I could give that to you all the time. If only we could get married... I swear I would make you the happiest, as happy as I know you would make me."
"Unfortunately you have Vision and I have James... society is slowly programming us to be another one of the bunch, another model of the housewives we're expected to be," You retorted, feeling infected by her melancholy. "That's why we have this, to escape from time to time."
"But I don't want it from time to time! You know something? I've had it with Vision," she stated, starting her car. "I'm sick of him not touching me, not listening to me, and just watching his stupid show."
Your eyes widened.
You never imagined hearing her say that. Sure, you complained about your husbands and the life they gave you, it just didn't seem feasible for neither of you to leave them.
But in the end, why couldn't you have what Steve and Peggy had, for example? And that's when you knew you could have it, you were just with the wrong people. The biggest question was, if Wanda got this person, was she going to leave you? Was it going to be really you?
And that was your biggest epiphany.
You didn't care if you could never have her the way you wanted her, just having her in your life in any way was more than enough. You wanted her happiness even if it was at the cost of your own, and that's when you realized that what you felt was love at its best.
"What are you going to do?" You questioned, once you came back to your senses. It wasn't until you got to your house that it happened.
"I'm going to take all the money he keeps hidden in that shoe box, get the hell out of this town and start over," she replied. "I've been thinking about it for about two weeks now, but I think it's time."
You felt a lump in your throat as you listened to Wanda's words. You couldn't believe that she was planning to go away and leave everything behind, and that on top of it all, she had her mind completely made up.
You had been through so much together, you had laughed, cried and shared unforgettable moments. But now, it seemed that all that would come to an end. You would return to that monotony where you desperately searched for something that could make the day different from others. You missed your home, your family, your friends... and it wasn't your husband, it was Wanda who made you feel that leaving all that behind was for the best.
And again, if she promised to do her best to find the happiness you knew she longed for as well, then this too would be worth it.
Tears began to well up in your eyes as you tried to keep your composure. You struggled for words, for inevitably, sadness gripped your heart. Goodbyes were never easy.
"What are you doing? Why are you crying?" Wanda asked, taking your face in her hands.
"It's just... I don't want to lose you, I love you and going back to the life before I met you is scary, but if that's what you want, then..."
"Don't be silly, you're coming with me," she interrupted, wiping your cheeks with her thumbs. "Wait, you said you loved me?"
You were surprised to hear Wanda's question, immediately mentally beating yourself up for not having calculated your words, but, to your surprise, you also felt a surge of joy at finally being able to express your feelings.
"Yes, I said I love you, silly!" You exclaimed, as if it hadn't been obvious enough. "Look at this godforsaken mess that you've made of me. You're like a bright light in my life, you're the only one who makes me laugh until my cheeks go numb, you make me feel alive, you taught me colors after I got used to so much black and white, you taught me a language I can't speak to someone else. You're everything I ever dreamed I could find in someone, how could I not love you?"
"We don't need to get married, we don't need a damn piece of paper to be happy. Happiness is the most important thing and we already have it," she said, moving closer to press her lips against yours for a moment. "I love you madly. Thank you for opening my eyes. You were my motivation for coming up with this plan in the first place, now that I know what it's like to really live, I refuse to go back to what came before."
"How are we going to do that?" You inquired, somehow reminding her that you too had an issue to disengage from.
"Meet me at midnight."
Once you returned home, you found the person you were unexpectedly certain you would leave behind in a matter of hours.
He had his feet up on the coffee table, his hair tousled and his tie undone, his eyes too focused on the television, which fortunately were struggling to stay open.
"You should go to sleep, or you'll have a very hard time getting up tomorrow," You suggested, knowing full well that you were only going to earn a complaint.
"It's my problem if I want to stay up all night," he grunted, straightening his posture to wake up a little. Even he couldn't deny that it was in vain.
With a scoff, you dropped your bag on the kitchen counter and headed for the bedroom.
You had to pack as soon as possible so that when James decided to go to bed, you wouldn't be caught literally displacing your entire life in a single suitcase.
You started with your clothes, which you folded into rolls so they would fit more effectively, and proceeded to take your beauty products, hygiene products, belongings that held sentimental significance, and sadly, space only allowed you to pack two pairs of your favorite shoes. It was a huge suitcase, the same one you used when you moved here, and you were even surprised at how much you could fit in it. You guess it was again going to accompany you in a new scenario, this time a successful one.
You heard James' clumsy footsteps approaching the room. By that time, you had the suitcase packed and hidden under the bed, waiting for midnight. It was only half an hour away.
He collapsed into bed, not bothering to change or pull the covers over himself. He just tossed and turned, with nothing else on his mind but sleep as soon as possible.
When the time came, you let out a deep sigh and carefully got out of bed, feeling your every movement like an explosion in the darkness of the room.
Once you felt more confident, you slowly bent down towards the suitcase you had hidden under the bed. Every inch you moved was a huge effort, but you knew you couldn't afford to be discovered.
Finally, you reached for the suitcase and carefully pulled it out. Each movement was as if you were touching a taut string, expecting that at any moment it might snap and make everything fall apart. Likewise, each step you took seemed to be heavier than the last, but without looking back for a moment, you kept moving forward, knowing that you were on the last step of your escape.
You heard footsteps approaching from behind and your heart began to pound.
No, no, no. You refused to turn around and look. You were too close!
You tried not to think about it, to convince yourself that everything was fine, but it was impossible.
Suddenly, a hand landed on your shoulder and you were startled. You turned around to face James, who was standing there, his eyes full of sadness and worry.
"Let me go, James. There's nothing you can do to stop me," you said quietly, trying to hide your fear.
"I know," he said in a calm voice. "I'm not going to stop you. There's no point in keeping this marriage if you're not happy. If I'm not happy. Go with her."
You were shocked to hear those words coming out of James' mouth. For so long, you had been holding back your true feelings for fear of hurting him, and that it would end badly. He already knew that, and he accepted it.
Your expression made him chuckle, "I saw you kissing before you came in," as if reading your thoughts, he confessed what you were wondering. "I just want you to know that I've been watching you for a while now. I noticed how happy you were coming back after spending time with her. Only someone very cruel would stand in the way of that... I'm not cruel, even though I haven't done a very good job of showing it."
You couldn't help but feel some gratitude towards James for being so understanding. It was a strange feeling, considering you were running away from him, but in that moment, you felt that you had finally found someone who understood what was going through your mind.
"You're not the only one who's been seeing other people. I've been seeing... men, too." He confessed, leaving you paralyzed, not knowing what to say. You never would have imagined James would say something like that to you. You felt confused, shocked, and at the same time, a little relieved. At least you weren't the only one who had been hiding something. "You should learn from me, I was careful about it," James joked, trying to lighten the tension in the air.
Finally, you found the right words, "Thank you, James. For understanding me, for being honest. I don't know what's going to happen to me and Wanda from now on, but I'm sure I'll find my way to happiness. And please do whatever it takes to find yours too, no matter with whom it is."
He simply nodded, an understanding expression on his face. "I promise I will, and I hope this isn't goodbye."
James and you hugged each other tightly, sharing an emotional moment that would seal the end of your marriage. It was amazing how this moment of parting was the one where you felt the most respect and compassion for him, and you could tell the feeling was mutual. It would have been easier if instead of condemning each other, you had been willing to understand each other.
Afterwards, he offered to walk you to the car towards Wanda, and you accepted. You walked together in silence, as if you both knew it was better to leave words behind.
The older woman was waiting inside the car, and both James and you laughed as her jaw practically dropped to the floor when she saw you. The confusion was palpable on every faction of her face.
James walked over to her and took her hand, looking at her lovingly, "Take care of each other as only you know how, love each other as you deserve to be loved, because you two are amazing people and deserve all the best in life." He told her sincerely, conveying his flooding desire to redeem himself.
Wanda was overwhelmed by your now ex-husband's words, and nodded tearfully. "Thank you for trusting me with something as precious as the happiness of this one right here."
James gave you one last hug before walking away, and Wanda's gaze was still fixed on him with equal parts sadness and gratitude.
You placed your suitcase in the trunk, and subsequently made your way to the passenger seat.
Wanda asked, "Do I want to know what happened?"
"Long story," you sighed, letting out the air you'd been holding in for far too long.
"Well, we have a long trip waiting for us. There's time," she started the car's engine.
With great excitement, your story with Wanda began this way, the person with whom you were destined to witness fulfillment at its greatest expression.
Together you started a business and lived on it, your daily routines never lacked for adventure and laughter. Every day your love grew more and more, and you never looked back, always moving forward together.
You fondly remember how each sunrise was like a new roller coaster of emotions, always full of new challenges. And in the most difficult moments, when darkness threatened to invade you, you clung to your union, knowing that together you could overcome any obstacle.
And so, with Wanda by your side, living each day with passion and enthusiasm, you knew you were exactly where you were meant to be, living your life to the fullest alongside the person you love most in this world.
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gremlinmodetweeker · 4 months ago
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A Boy, A Twisted Memory and A Desire for Love
So this is the first official Ghost story on my blog. I know, I know, it's been a long time writing and I've not written something for the guy, but it's really just because I get so worried about writing him poorly.
I know he's a big military guy who hates having emotions and kills any and all kindness in his heart, but I also really like the idea of him exploring the concept of healing from his trauma? I dunno, I just thought about it.
Also, like König, I can't imagine Ghost keeping normal pets. Originally I had him get a spider, but then I read over his backstory again and it made more sense for him to get a venomous snake. I think it's a major step to overcoming his trauma. By the way! Big trigger warning, this is about a snake! This entire fic centres around a snake!
Anyways, I had some fun writing this but it made me super sad.
TW: Snake, discussion of past abuse, emotional trauma, child abuse (referenced), emotional disregulation
Wordcount: 1.7k
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Story Below the Cut
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A Boy, A Twisted Memory and A Desire for Love
Simon locked eyes with the little black and yellow creature housed deep within its cave. It was a small thing, barely hatched from its egg it looked like. The length of a ruler at most. It was a light thing, covered in fine scales along its supple body. This thing was venomous, yes, but it couldn’t do any real damage. It was a threat maybe to a mouse, but a man such as himself wouldn't fall to such weak poison. Swelling, pain, nausea, yes. But death? Not quite.
And yet, his heart quickened within his chest. He could feel the sweat forming on his brow. It had been so long since he’d seen one of these beasts, and yet the same fear from back then wormed its way inside him now.
“Hungry?” Simon’s voice was particularly gravelly, roughened by sleep deprivation and lack of use.
The creature made no move. He’d be surprised if the thing even heard him. Did it even have ears? He’d have to ask the breeder later.
“Been a long time since I’ve seen one of yer kind before,” he admitted. He didn’t quite know why, but it felt somewhat soothing to speak to the thing.
“I killed the last one of ye that I saw. Crushed the fucker right under my boot, I did.”
It didn’t seem to scare the beast off. He wondered if it really was more afraid of him than he was of it. He hoped that was true. He didn’t want to admit that the fear still wriggled under his skin.
“He wasn’t anything like what my dad ‘ad,” Simon closed his eyes as the oppressive memories washed over him, “that one was a right bastard. Bigger than anything I’ve seen ever since. Shoved it right in my face, he did. Wouldn’t let me go till I kissed it right on the lips. If it bit me, I wouldn’t be standin’ ‘ere. But you,” Simon opened his eyes, dark eyes matching two glassy eyes of inky black, “you’re nothing. You're pathetic. You’re… You're so small.”
Simon turned back to the breeder.
Finally, the creature came to its senses and slithered back further into its burrow. So sleek and streamlined, and yet so slow to move. It was afraid of him, that Simon decided the moment he noticed that despite backing away, it didn’t dare look elsewhere.
“How much for this one?” he asked as he pointed at the plastic cube.
“That one?” the woman blinked and looked at what he was pointing at, “the female or the male?”
“The female,” Simon clarified.
“Oh she’s pretty, isn’t she?” the woman adjusted her glasses as she slid behind the plastic cube, “poor girl’s probably pretty scared being out here.” She didn’t mention how terrifying Simon was in his dark clothing, rough fabric stretched tight across his broad frame. He was used to scaring people by this point. Sometimes, like now, he wished he wasn’t.
“How do you pronounce that?” Simon pointed at the name that had been scrawled in blue ballpoint pen on a blank sticker.
“Boida dendrophila,” the woman replied, “she’s pretty young, but she’ll get big soon enough.”
“She’s one of them big ones, yeah?” Simon asked aloofly.
“You bet your arse,” the woman grinned, “she’ll be big soon enough. Don’t know much about ‘em?”
“Oh no,” Simon leaned down to take a better look at the little beast, “I’ve been doing my reading.”
“You got a big enough enclosure for her?” the woman quizzed him.
“Sure do,” Simon hummed, “I built her an enclosure myself. It’s nearly as tall as me, long too. Got some nice branches for her to climb and all that..”
“Wow that’s a lot of space. You sure that’s not too much?” the woman frowned.
“She won’t be in there for a bit, I’ve got something for while she’s small,” Simon reasoned.
What a stupid question.
“Oh well that’s fine,” the woman broke out into another smile, “but yeah she’s eating mostly baby mice, an adult once in a while. You know she’ll be eating bigger things when she’s full grown, right? You can handle that?”
“I think I’ll be quite alright,” Simon mused, “have to admit, she’s a right beauty.”
“She really is, isn’t she?” the woman gushed, “I’ve been raising her since she was just hatched. But now? Well, normally I sell them off a bit sooner, but she grew on me. Unfortunately, the husband isn’t too fond of her and wants her to be moved on.”
“Why’s that?” Simon looked at the woman from behind his sunglasses.
“Oh he got bit when she was the length of a pencil,” the woman laughed, “he’s held it against her ever since!”
“Heard her kind can get pretty feisty,” Simon commented as he looked back at the spider.
“They can get a bit aggressive, I won't lie to you. A bit territorial, too,” the woman explained carefully so as not to scare off the only interested customer she had all weekend.
“Real fast,” Simon continued on, “with nasty bites.”
“Sounds like you’ve done your reading,” the woman laughed uncomfortably.
“Course,” Simon refrained from rolling his eyes, “so how much is she? The sticker’s ripped.”
“She’s on sale, actually,” the woman grinned, “only a couple hundred quid.”
“That much, eh?” Simon straightened up to tower over the slender woman.
“Normally she could be anywhere up to four hundred,” the woman fought back against the subtle threat of intimidation.
“Well then,” Simon looked down at the cube, “looks like I got a good deal then.”
“You won’t go stompin’ on her, will you?” the woman furrowed her brows.
“No ma’am, that was just what I had to do when I went out to the Middle East,” Simon chuckled humorlessly, “I wouldn’t dream of hurtin’ this here little lady.”
The woman grinned as she counted her bills, Simon smiled just slightly as he picked up the container and brought it back to his car.
When he got home, he carefully moved the little creature into the glass enclosure of dirt, leaf litter and cork bark. He put it back in its place on his shelf and smiled.
“Dendrophila, eh?” he chuckled, “how ‘bout Ophelia? That’s a cute lil name for ya.”
The creature only burrowed away under the cork bark, eager to get out of sight of the frightening giant before her. He didn’t blame the little thing, he’d be terrified of himself if he was a younger man.
Once, he’d hardened himself into an unstoppable thing, a monster of a man. He had formed his shell through cruel lashings the world had lavished upon him. He took ablutions in raining blood. He was festering sickness or silver sin. He was what he despised in the world, the monster he tried to protect his own family from. When his brothers in arms welcomed each other warmly, they regarded him as a feral dog to be kept at a distance, chained in the backyard, out in the rain.
In Simon’s heart there was no room for love. He was not a man forged in kindness and love. He was the unfortunate son of Mr. Riley, cursed from birth to be raised in the muck and mire of human atrocities. He had been calloused by the time he was nine, and by the time he joined the military even the recruiting officers were afraid of him. He was too cruel, too strict, too much for anyone to handle. He could brute-force his way through life, but only for so long.
Even monsters had hearts. This was the unfortunate fact that Simon had learned far too late in life. He hated himself for how he wallowed in his loneliness. He thought his team would be enough, but there was a despicable part that still resided deep within him. He could offer his rotten sort of love to his teammates, but he could never care for them like he needed to. There was a part of him that had been stunted since childhood, and far too late it breached his skin to scream into his ears, begging him to please just notice me, notice me and don't let me die here inside of you.
He didn’t want to, but he spoke to a therapist. It was Price's advice after he'd broken down with a bottle of whisky in one hand and a revolver in the other. Price promised to never say a word as he unwound his lieutenant's fingers from the trigger.
A week later he'd arrived at a small office. They’d been cowed by him at first. Everyone was, but something about frightening the one person he wanted to be helped by hurt a part of Simon he wished to rip from his chest. Once he would have laughed, but in that office, he could only hurt. No tears fell, but his walls did and he was able to speak openly for the first time in his entire life without the help of a bottle of jack and a pair of dice. It felt wrong. He hated it, but he learned.
His therapist told him that to help rid himself of this festering parasite of an emotion, he should try to nurture the damned thing. Simon had laughed in the man’s face. He then told him to go to Hell. The man had learned not to flinch in the face of a predator, and so pushed forth. He said that to grow, Simon could try getting a cat or a dog. Something he could raise with the love he never had been given as a boy.
He said that he needed something to love or else he'd never be able to heal. Simon scoffed and left the room, but not before booking another appointment. The smug look on his therapist’s face disgusted him. He turned quickly and left.
So maybe it was out of spite that he bought Ophelia, but there was a part of him that felt like he needed the little creature. He needed something to love, and so he did. He loved the Ophelia with all his heart. He nurtured her and cared for her as best he could.
Months passed, and he started to handle Ophelia. She hissed, she scurried away, she did everything to get away from Simon’s touch. He figured that if he had to face himself, he’d do much the same. He wasn’t a creature born of love and compassion. He was death, in face and in heart, but each time he brought Ohpelia’s container out and changed her water, when she ate from his tongs, he could feel his rotten heart beating within his chest. It made him smile despite himself.
He was not a creature of love, and yet it was love he felt when Ophelia tentatively reached out and slithered up his hand. When he raised her up, ever so gently, he couldn’t help but cry.
How cruel was the world that a boy, born from street gutters and raised by heavy hands, would only ever feel love for the first time in a dingy London flat on his thirty-first birthday, alone save for the venomous snake in his hands?
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Stories
Ghost Dump
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becauseicantthinkwritings · 2 years ago
Text
Teeth
Part 13
Masterlist
Warnings: Stalker vibes, confrontations, anxiety.
Photo by shaazjung on Instagram
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"There's something you haven't explained to me." Billy says suddenly.
You pause, from sending your messages, looking across at him from your spot in the passenger seat.
You raise your eyebrows expectantly.
"Why do you think hackers- or people trying to breach security in general- would underestimate the level of sophistication of the system?"
You take a deep breath, lean back.
"Because," You say with a tired sigh, "When they search up the company structure, they'll see me as a consultant."
"You?"
"Female." You clarify.
"You really think that people will make that assumption?"
"Why not? It's been happening for most of my life anyway, I'm just weaponising it now."
He's silent for a long moment.
"I'm sorry that you have to go through that."
"It's fine," You sing, "It means I get to design a system that looks dumb but ruins some fucker's life."
He smiles fondly, glancing over at you.
"Come over to my place next week, I'll do the cooking this time."
You hum, prolonging your response so that it seems like you take some time to decide.
In reality, saying no was never an option.
"Sure, I'd like that."
You don't notice the way his shoulders drop subtly, relaxing, just moments after.
.
It's not as difficult to leave your place alone as it was before.
Sure, for those first few weeks after the robbery, you'd only gone to and from work with Billy and occasionally, one of your friends would accompany you to the supermarket.
Today, when Amy calls to find out of you're still on for later, you pause, and tell her that maybe you're going to try to go by yourself today.
She's quiet for a moment, and you can almost hear her thinking.
"Okay, but please call if you feel even a little bit unsure?" You can hear the worry in her voice, you know that she's thinking about the first time she accompanied you, and you hid in the bathroom for ten minutes cause you thought you were being followed.
"I will, Amy, thank you."
Truthfully, you could never shake the feeling that you were being watched.
It went with you everywhere, like a shadow that just kept coming back no matter how much light you shined on it.
You tried to take deep breaths, and reassure yourself that everything was okay. It was the best you could do.
Billy was the only person that made you feel completely safe, his knowledge and background meant that you could very much trust whenever he said you weren't being followed.
But now? Alone like this, you try not to look over your shoulder too many times when examining apples, or not to freeze up when someone got too close to you.
Overall, at the cashier, you find yourself a little glad that you're able to at least get this far despite anything that may happen later.
It's a step in the right direction for your self-empowerment, a reminder that time can sometimes help repair the damage caused by traumatic events.
You're piling your groceries into the trunk of your car when you hear someone say your name.
Freezing in fear is a normal response for you, but once again, you do your best to breathe through it, and turn.
"Andrew? Hello," you greet.
Your former boss gives you a sharp smile and approaches. You take your time, assessing him as a possible threat.
He looks a bit sallow, the underneath of his eyes are a little grey, possibly with lack of sleep, a shadow of a beard sprouting on the base of his face.
He looks a bit unkempt, his hands in his pockets and you make sure to casually put your trolley between him and you for safety.
"You look like you're doing great." He says, taking in your piles of items, and then carefully looking at you.
You watch his eyes trail down your body and your head lights up with warning signs.
You smile politely, nodding your head.
"I'm fine, I hope you are too." You offer lightly, trying to finish packing your car as quickly as possible.
"Well, when you left, the everyone was counting on Anvil to accept our offer. When he declined, the board decided I wasn't good enough at my job."
You swallow. Is that was this was? A guilt trip?
"I'm sorry to hear that." You state calmly.
He takes a shaky step forward, and you stand your ground looking right at him. You think if he tried something, the shopping cart would come in handy in keeping him away from you.
"It's odd though, I keep playing my last meeting with Russo over and over in my head, and do you know what stood out to me?"
You don't respond.
"What stood out," he continues, "Is that Russo only wanted you."
So this was an accusation.
"Now why would he want someone like you, if you weren't fucking him?"
You press your teeth together angrily.
"Fuck. You." You grit out.
He blinks, having never seen you this angry before. You continue before he has the chance to speak.
"You think I wanted to leave? I left because you kept treating me like shit. Over and over again, and now you think you can come here and accuse me of this? No wonder you got fired when I left, because you couldn't keep taking credit for my work."
"You little bitch." He says taking another step forward until his body is right against the shopping cart. He grips the metal side of it, leaning forward even more in an attempt to get into your space.
"I vouched for you so many times. I'm the reason you got this job in the first place. You were nobody, nothing, until I decided to give you a chance. I've been watching you for a week now, trying to get you alone to talk to you, and you've been hooked to William Russo like dirt under his boot, and you want to tell me you aren't fucking him?"
You feel the fear of realization sink under your skin. Your stomach turns, making you nauseated.
"You've been following me?" You ask, in a much smaller voice than you want to.
He frowns, pushes away from the trolley and turns his back to you for a moment.
"Don't flatter yourself, I only wanted to talk."
He grits out.
You don't say anything, just watching his figure, trying to figure out how to get away from him.
You close your trunk, he watches you return your cart to the little docking station nearby.
"I'm sorry for the way things turned out." You say to him finally, trying to ease the tension.
He studies you for a long moment.
"You can fix this. Bring Russo back to us, they'll take you back, you can vouch for me like I once vouched for you."
"I'm not going to do that."
He grunts angrily, taking steps to approach you.
You back away, but he just keeps coming, he's almost in your personal space when suddenly a hand claps down on his shoulder.
The parking lot security guard looks very stern as he pulls Andrew a safe distance away from you.
"Is this man bothering you?" The security inquires in your direction.
You gulp, thinking that if you said 'yes,' you'd be forced to stand around here for longer.
"A bit, but I just want to leave." You finally say.
The guard nods, standing as a wall between Andrew and you, and you take the out, sliding into your car as fast as you can and reversing out of your park.
You don't look back.
.
'I don't suppose you could spare a moment to come over?' You send in his direction.
You swallow, turning your phone over in your hands, deep in thought.
You phone vibrates, you glance down.
'Be there in 5.'
"It's open." You say, when you hear a knock on the door.
He comes through slowly, no harsh sounds ever present when he's around.
"I know this building is safe, but you really should check before you let people in. What if that wasn't me?"
You don't answer, just staring at him as he locks the door behind him.
You sigh, your feet tucked under you as you lounge on your couch, your third glass of wine cupped securely in your hands.
You look up when he says your name.
You study him the same way he studies you. His hair is wet from a recent shower, but he's dressed comfortably this time, in black sweatpants and a soft green hoodie. He looks so comfortable, and the words 'boyfriend material' spring to mind, your mouth twitches, deep in thought, thinking about what he would say if you said that to him.
"Are you alright?" He asks after studying you.
You nod, taking another long sip of wine. He looks behind you, probably noting the abundance of unpacked groceries on your kitchen counter. You'd brought most of them up, only really worrying about the frozen and refrigerated items before you'd stopped, in favour of the sweet white you were now holding.
"Sometimes, I really hate the field I chose."
Billy looks at you for a moment, trying to read into you, but you know he doesn't have all the information.
"Why?" He asks, stepping forward and dropping into the spot beside you easily.
You rest your cheek on the back of the couch, looking up at him.
"It would be easier. I could have picked the culinary arts instead of this and no one would question if I was sleeping with my boss everytime I did something good."
"Someone accused you of that?" Billy asks evenly, doesn't take his eyes off of you.
You sigh, nodding, swirling your wine around in your little cup- not using a piece of glassware out of fear that you may break it.
"Andrew," You say softly to Billy, despair heavy in the farthes reaches of your mind.
"He followed me, confronted me, accused me, and then tried to bargain with me to come back."
You sigh, sniffling for a brief moment, fighting the pressure behind your eyes as tears pool.
You blink quickly to stop them from falling.
"He told me that I would be nothing without him. And all the way home I kept thinking that if I'd just picked something else, anything else, I might be a little bit happier."
A teardrop splashes into your wine, you wipe at it quickly.
He lets out a slow breath and you glance up at him in surprise, half realising that he's still here, watching you.
His dark eyes are tender, studying you in great detail before lifting a hand and crooking two fingers at you.
"Come here." Is all he says.
You breathe out a rush of air, knocking back the last two moutfuls of wine in your cup before setting the item on the little table in front of you.
You move slowly, giving him a chance to change his mind, leaning into him, and slowly resting your head into the crook of his neck.
His arms wrap around you, pulling you even closer until you're half seated in his lap.
There's just a rightness to being in his arms that finally breaks the dam inside of you. You let out a little sob, and his arms tighten around you as your body begins to shake as you cry.
"Sorry," you hiccup, "I- I'm sorry."
He shushes you softly, his cheek resting on the top of your head.
You feel small in his arms, a fragile thing made to be picked up and cared for and he very sensation makes you cry harder because it feels good, and you find yourself unable to gather the strength to think about pulling away from him. His scent is around you, his body pressed so tightly to yours that there's no gap between you.
There's a small abstract moment in your head, that you're able to identify a wholeness that wasn't there before.
You shiver, looking up at him with tear-stained cheeks, noting the feeling that you'd never realised you were missing something until he took you into his arms.
His thumbs wipe at your fresh tears, pushing them back, forcing them away.
You press your head back against his chest, shudders out a sigh as his arms go right back around you.
"There's so much I want to say," Billy starts, "I don't even know where too begin."
You sniffle.
"You don't have to." You murmur, hoping that he doesn't feel obligated to comfort you with his words.
You feel your head begin to swim as your third glass of wine begins to catch up to you.
"When I started Anvil, I had nothing." He says, his voice smooth and deep in your ear.
"There was me, and an idea, and I made a lot of questionable deals in order to get my company started."
You hear him swallow.
"There was one man, he believed that because he gave me a chance when no one else would, that he owned me. He treated me like his own personal dog, and for a couple of years, all I did was whatever he asked."
You listen intently, melting into him as he begins to rub circles into your lower back.
"It took me a while- longer than I'd care to admit- to understand that just because he helped me, it didn't mean I owed him everything. Sure, his generosity was appreciated, but it was my work that took Anvil off the ground, and seeing how far it's come, how far it has yet to go, and how much good it does makes it worthwhile for me."
He takes a moment to catch his breath.
"What I'm saying is, that you don't owe anyone a damn thing. Your successes are your own, because you did them." He makes a little sound of amusement at the back of his throat before continuing, "You're the secret ingredient."
You sniffle, smiling at his words.
"Andrew thinks he gave you these opportunities out of the goodness of his heart, but that's bullshit. You showed him who you were, and he picked you because he thought you were good at your job."
"And you?" You ask, desperate to hear it, "Why did you pick me?"
He makes a tiny huff of amusement.
"Because I love my company," You feel his face press into your hair, "And I wanted to give it the best chance, which is you."
You sigh, pressing yourself as close to him as possible, breathing in that amazing spiced scent, before relaxing fully, turning to a boneless mass in his arms.
"Thank you." You finally say to him.
He makes a deep sound in the back of his throat, you feel the vibration against your cheek.
He doesn't let go, and you have to motivation to pull away.
You're so at ease that you can't help closing your eyes, falling asleep in his arms without a second thought.
.
He holds you for a long while, a stupid smile on his face as he breathes in your strawberry scent.
When he's sure he won't wake you, he slips a hand under your knees, and stands with you in his arms.
You make a little sound, your arms wrapping tighter around his neck.
Billy takes his time, walking you to your bedroom, pulling the covers back and placing you down.
You don't let go of him, clinging like a koala, his eyes widen as you almost pull all of his body weight on top of yourself, he catches his weight on his arms before he crushes you.
He tries to pull away but you're not having it, maneuvering him in your sleep, until he's on his back, and your body is cradled against his, your head on his chest.
He lets out a breath of amusement, raising the hand that isn't pinned under you to stroke you hair.
He hears you hum in bliss and he smiles.
He wants to worship you so badly, kiss every inch of your skin, and then twice over for good measure.
He can't help it, pressing his thumb over the pout of your lips, his heart flipping when you draw even closer to him.
How can he pull himself away from you now? What kind of strength would that take?
Billy thinks about what would happen if he stayed right here beside you, if you wake up in the morning and find him here, you'd probably be so at ease.
He wanted that, he would probably kiss you at some point.
He can feel his heart racing as he thinks about it, kissing you breathless, giving you rounds of uninhibited pleasure, hearing you beg for him as if he would ever deny you.
But what about after?
He swallows, worried about after.
He wouldn't be able to keep himself away from you. Once, would never be enough.
He'd have to have you, over and over and over, never wanting to hide your relationship.
But that would make rumors true, it would invalidate your successes because you were sleeping with your boss.
The breath that escapes him is so pained that it takes him a second to take another.
He'd never forgive himself if he ruined your reputation that way.
He sighs, tracing the back of his hand over your cheeks and listening to the way you sigh.
He knew what you wanted, your body made it crystal clear everytime he was around you, calling out for him, and if he were a weaker man, he'd oblige.
His relationship with control was strained on a good day. The military had helped him focus his anger, train his rage and his bloodlust, but nothing had trained him to control his desire.
As Billy looked at you, sleeping in his arms, he felt his control grinding down with each breath you took.
It was only a matter of time.
.
Alone.
Again.
You sit up, taking a sad breath.
How did he always manage to slip away from you? Why?
What would it take to wake up next to him?
A question that goes unanswered.
In your kitchen, you're stunned to find that all your groceries have been packed away, only a few items in unfamiliar places. A warm feeling in your chest, you almost want to text him and thank him, except that you remember the last time you did that he left you on read. You decide to tell him in person when he's taking you to work.
You get dressed for work like usual, but when you're halfway ready, you pause, thinking about Dani's words from a few days ago.
In an effort to torment him, you shed your fancy work shirt and grab one of the work appropriate dresses in your closet.
It's sky blue, with half sleeves and matching belt. You're not sure if it will even catch his eye, but you decide to try anyway.
Except that when you step out of your aparment building, it's not Billy waiting for you.
You've seen Sergei around before, but you blink in surprise when he nods his head at you, and pulls open the back door of the car he's standing in front of.
Your heart plummets.
He'd sent someone else to pick you up.
You smile at Sergei, asking him for a moment before you pull your phone from your pocket and dial his number.
"Russo." Is what he says when he answers.
"Hey," You greet lightly, trying to be quick, "Did you send someone else to take me to work?"
He's silent for a moment.
"Yes, I-"
"Okay thank you," you interrupt, not interested in hearing what he had to say, "Just checking to make sure. Bye."
You end the call, staring at your phone for a second before shaking your head.
You turn to Sergei, giving him a smile and a word of thanks as you slide into the back seat of the car.
"Do you have any music preferences?" He asks kindly, and you wonder briefly if that was even in the scope of his job.
"Anything is good with me." You respond, crossing your arms and looking out the window angrily as he begins to drive.
You have many hindsight realisations on your way to work, that you really could have driven yourself. The only reason you were okay with Billy taking you is because he was going in the same direction anyway.
This just seemed like way too much time and effort to get you to work.
You try to make excuses for Billy, like maybe something urgent happened at work, or something personal, you didn't really know every aspect of his life now did you?
But you knew in the back of your head, that this was something he always does. He gets close, gives you blissful peace, and then pulls away, ignores you for a few days.
Frankly, you've hit your boiling point, and by the time you get to work, you're fuming.
You drop your things on your desk, and you give your coworker a big smile when she compliments your dress.
You'd worn it for him. Pathetic.
You make it up to his office, smiling at Katerina, his secretary, asking her if he's available and waiting for a yes before you knock on his door and enter when he says.
He doesn't even look up at you.
Taking notes at his desk, and there's just so much anger inside of you that you're not really thinking straight.
"Is there something you need?" He asks flatly, still not sparing you a single glance.
So he knows it's me, you think, and yet somehow he refuses to look up.
It cuts like betrayal.
"I can drive myself to work from now on, thank you."
He pauses, finally, looking up at you.
You watch him swallow.
"I insist, really, it's safer this way." He says.
"But inefficient," you counter, "To have Sergei go out of his way no doubt, when I have a perfectly good car."
He looks like he wants to argue, but can't form the right words.
He stands, eyebrows drawn, coming to stand in front of you.
It's probably a bad idea on his part, given your warped headspace, your eyes drop to his lips for a brief moment, before going back up to his dark eyes when he speaks.
"Very well, if you insist on driving, it's your choice."
You nod sharply, your throat closing up in despair. Was this the end of your friendship?
"Good." You say, no emotion in your tone, "One more thing."
"Yes?" He asks.
You swallow, grabbing the knot of his tie and pulling him down a little, while simultaneously rising onto your toes.
You don't give it a second thought, pressing your mouth to his.
It's like fireworks going off in your head, sparks spilling over and scattering into the farthest reaches of your mind.
You let out a little sigh of bliss into his mouth before releasing your grip on his tie.
You pull back from his mouth, taking a deep breath to apologise when suddenly his hands are on your hips. You feel the way his fingers twitch, as if he's fighting something bigger than you.
You gasp as he pulls you closer, body pressed tightly to his and you look up into his eyes.
He angles his head down, and his mouth is on yours once more.
He returns the kiss this time, with eager hums and steady pressure. It's greater than any other kiss you've ever experienced.
Your chest feels warm, your stomach flips, sizzling sparks work their way over your skin.
Your hands grip his shoulders, snaking their way up behind his neck.
He groans, hot breath into your parted mouth and you accept the sound greedily, more desperate for him than ever before.
He turns you, presses you up against his desk, braces his arms on either side of you for a moment before his hand cups the back of your neck securely.
It's all consuming, the way his mouth moves this way and that, the friction of his beard on your chin the taste of his mouth threatening to undo you.
His blunted fingers pressing tight into your skin, his hands wander your body, reaching for your knee, raising it to wrap around his hip. Your clothed center just barely brushes a hint of stiffness at the front of his pants and all you're thinking in various levels of enthusiasm is 'yes.'
The loud pitch of his ringing phone startles you. You shove him away quickly in surprise, gasping as you slide from your spot between him and his desk.
Your body is hot, cunt throbbing, skin hypersensitive and aching for his hands.
You suck in a big breath, smoothing your hair over in a panicked frenzy and running your hands down your dress.
Oh God.
Oh God.
Had you really just did that? Kissed him when you'd come in here to tell him off?
You try to take another measured breath but Billy seems to have taken all the air in the room with just one touch of his lips.
.
"Russo." Billy says, leaning over the desk, putting his phone on loudspeaker.
"Apologies for interrupting, but Miss Meachum is here and demanding to meet."
Billy huffs, of course he'd be interrupted by a Meachum. The entire family never understood boundaries.
He looks over at you, facing the windows, taking deep breaths and looking more and more flustered by the second.
"Tell her I'll be with her shortly." He says, hanging up right after.
He studies you, the ripe scent of your arousal filling the air. The panther tears at him, to sit you on his desk and follow through with exactly what he was about to do.
When he resists, the beast plants images of you writhing in pleasure as he licks your strawberry sweet cunt. His cock is half-hard, growing more erect with each second his mind replays what it was like to finally have your soft lips on his.
He swallows, opens his mouth to speak.
You beat him to it.
"I'll drive myself to work from now on." You utter harshly.
He watches in disbelief, mouth parted, as you head to the door, opening it and stepping out without so much as a glance at him.
It's all he needs to realize how much he's fucked up.
.
.
.
A/N: sorry 😞
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jess-the-vampire · 10 months ago
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I love the idea of Eda being this terrifyingly powerdul witch who rules over the Boiling Isles, but she's still a complete softie when it comes to her kids.
Eda: We have ways of making you talk-- Luz, sweetie, Mommy's working right now-- Oh my gosh, did you draw this? *holds up Young Luz's drawing of a flower* That is so good!
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(i'm going to pocket that idea as a animatic video i could do later)
yeah the reason this happened was because when i made the au, even though it was a swap au, i really did not have the heart to make eda of all people actually abusive.
so i figured "Hey, if au philip is not going to be 100% like eda anyway and keep some of his flaws from the show, i don't seen why eda can't be technically an antagonist but also keep being a decent parent".
the swap is trying to keep them in character, even if philip is struggling to get better and eda is having her own unique issues.
(like i think there's some misconception that philip is a "Good person" in the au, and while he is better....i would not clarify him as a "Good person", just a "Recovering" and "Improving" individual)
So eda loves her kids, even if she screws up, there's good intent at least.
it's actually what i originally was hoping they'd do for belos before it was revealed what his relationship with hunter was like in s2.
Not that i'm against what they went with (Like it's still a fine story as is), but it would of been kinda interesting for a show to tackle a child leaving their villianous parent behind, despite the fact they have a genuinely loving relationship.
like imagine if philip HAD cared for hunter (I mean i think he technically kinda does in canon, but in a more toxic way), he was still doing all this horrible stuff and still hurting people, but hunter was the exception and he always treated him well.
So when luz and the gang try to turn hunter around, it breaks his heart to see his uncle as a bad person, and how to process that. Not to mention how hard it would of been for him to leave in the first place.
could even still of had the grimwalker aspect and left hunter wondering if his uncle ever loved him at all or he just loved caleb instead.
Making belos abusive to hunter was just the obvious route to take, so it would of been interesting had they done something like this and subverted those expectations. It would of certainly added to the "People are complicated" thing the show kinda was talking about near the end.
But i don't write the show, so instead i just added some of those aspects into my au instead with eda and luz (Though eda in this au really isn't that bad a person tbh)
i guess it makes for a fun dynamic in the au, eda cares about her kids and her family and that's more the motivation for her being an antagonist then anything.
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babyboywinchester · 7 months ago
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i’m watching supernatural for the first time. i’m on season 3 right now, but i’m not that excited for castiel that comes in season 4, just mainly because misha collins gives me the ick. like calling the CW homophobic because dean and castiel didn’t get together is already weird because like why is he so hung up about it?? i know it has a lot to do with his fan base, but normal actors don’t really interact with their fans like that, like why is he leading them on for a show that ended four years ago?! also i know he’s probably done a lot of bad things but saying the f-slur when he had to clarify he’s straight is wrong. also him saying the slur in the context of gay people needing to reclaim it was so bizarre to me, like dude stop saying it?! he just gives me the ick big time with all that.
also sorry this was so long.
No need to apologize, dear one! I love getting asks or talking so fear not.
I’m excited the hear about you starting Supernatural! I loved the first three seasons. My sister and I started watching it back in the fall of 2012 when I was a senior in high school. It was so exciting and we couldn’t wait to watch as many episodes after school as we could. Anyway, the magic wore off after we got all caught up and were able to watch season 9 as it aired and I became more involved in the fandom side on tumblr… destiel was EVERYWHERE and as someone who was realizing they were a wincest shipper… that made it all that much worse.
Luckily, I have found that the Destiel screechy circle are but a VERY small minority. Thank GOD… but oh are they loud. That ties in to Misha of course. You know the signs they have in places that say stuff like “don’t feed the animals.”? Yeah, those are for people like himself who insist on baiting and egging on these mentally unwell people into believing, and filling his pockets, because it saves him the trouble of having to get a job or actually work on making changes himself.
So, the whole balls deep thing? Real bold of him to say at a convention where Jensen wasn’t present when Jensen himself, numerous times, has mentioned he does not like Destiel. Also bold of Misha seeing as he’s unemployed and the CW was the place that gave him his longest running job… that’s also called defamation and if I were the CW I would send a cease and desist letter. He’s emboldened by these people who worship the ground he walks on because they fetishize one gay ship. He takes them for the rubes they are and milks money from them by just regurgitating the same shit they pass around to each other in their little bubbles. I’m sure you’ve come across them… so I won’t even mention some of their names here as I don’t have the time or patience to deal with their lot.
Yes, bold of a man to use the word “f-g” when he had to walk back coming out as bisexual and come out as straight. He’s learned nothing. He’s also just gross, crass, and all around an unpleasant person. He knows this is his only way to stay relevant and so he’s going to milk it until it’s dry.
Fear not you are NOT the only one who can’t stand him or Castiel. Luckily, regardless of what the hellers say, he doesn’t add much to the story and his “arcs” can be completely ignored and it doesn’t take away from the story any.
Thanks for the ask! I hope you’ll send more as you continue watching the show!
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