#anyway i feel like i may have to link this multiple times in the future

[seventhdoctor]

#also to be fair he was a kid when he did it

Okay I wasn't going to comment on the original reply because 1) Yubel's crimes aren't even the point of this post* and 2) that user doesn't seem to like me in particular (given they have an "anti" tag that's just posts of mine they've commented on) and I've blocked them to save us both some headache, but before this risks breaking containment too hard I want to point out the original tags here:

Note that the person who made these comments chose to omit the last tag, which on top of phrases like "never 4get" is intended to communicate that I am attempting to be funny on the Internet and roasting a character I'm fond of, rather than seriously attacking his character. On a joke post, about Yugioh characters saying skill issue.

* And before someone tries to take this out of context again, I shouldn't even have to say this but this skill issue joke post is not intended to be a post where I discuss my opinions of Yubel's crimes and it never was.

Edit: I realize this post is a bit cranky so here's an additional joke now that I've had to comment on the original reply anyway:

Check for comprehension (in the style of reading-comp-posting):

What meme is the original post referencing?

Are the speakers of the shown quotes taken seriously? Are lines like "while you were wasting time being dead" intended to be interpreted as reasonable judgements of others' circumstances?

Is it likely that the tags are taking described offenses seriously? Out of the three shown quotes, why are OP's tags referencing one speaker specifically? What do phrases like "the most guy ever" convey about OP's opinion of that character?

How does user janestvalentine interpret the quoted tags? Given your answer to #3, is this a reasonable interpretation?

Of the original tags, which ones does user janestvalentine include or exclude in their quote? Is any information lost from excluded tags?

OP posted a screenshot edit attributing user janestvalentine's comments to a particular character. Discuss with a mutual familiar with GX: is this a usual comment that character would make? Given your answers to #2 and #5, why might OP have chosen to make this comparison?

Yugioh characters simply have no patience for your skill issues.

[welp-back-on-my-bs]

Mmmmm Silvio rant time- because bday-

Fuck I love this man- his story is so good to like- wtf-

He starts out as a total price of shit, a snobbish bitch who is literally everything we hate about capitalism. First impression makes me think of Daughter of Evil and the princess in that song. That's the impression that the king wants Silvio to give off and what he has of Silvio (a spoiled brat who is just an asshole but good at buisness).

But that's what he was groomed into becoming by his parents. Going trough his story we get a bit of a better picture of Silvio, the actual one. He is very kind and believes in people, doing what he can to make them succeed in life(what he does with thr baker and what he tried to do with Rio). He is stubborn as all fucking hell and dosent really open up about his feelings easily. He is loyal to a fault, his loyalty may at first appear to be to his father, but the fact that he insults and belittles him at every opportunity shows otherwise. His true loyalty is to the people of Bennonite, their futures, to Rio, and eventually Emma if his route is chosen.

The first thing we see of Silvio is him haveing pushed a woman away after sex and then drinking. He drinks, alot. It may be a cultural thing, but I think it's also a repression thing. He is addicted to alcohol and sex to hide any bit of weakness.

His distain towards women is a clear factor that his parents put a very negative perception of women into his head. Basically every negative thing he has said about women, that's his father talking about his mother. Or him talking about his mother.

Now- for the Dalmation symbolism. I think the princes chose their crest around the age of 12 so that their personality has mainly formed and whatnot. So, Silvio choseing Dalmation works well (and I think makes his bond with Rio all the better because Rio also chose a dog).

For the physical symbolism, Dalmatians have a white coat with black spots on it. This shows Silvio is good at heart but has been trough and done bad things. That won't go away, but he is still a good person all the same.

Dalmations (like alot of dogs) were bred for hunting. So Silvio being sent out to do the trades, being the Bennonite representative, etc. Is his father putting him to use and sending him out for the hunt foe whatever reason he has that time. (To hopefully get him killed too)

Intelligence, loyalty, courage, determination, strength, and adaptability. Those are all things dalmations are known for and very easily apply to Silvio aswell.

This man is very intelligent, I mean, he is a merchant. I would pur him just below Gilbert and Chealver when it comes to intelligence. It probably wasn't ingrained into him, but he picked up differnt things while doing the kings errands.

I already did loyalty-

Determination... ❤️. Anyways- that determination is heavily linked towards his stubbornness. In his Romantic route, he comes up with a plan to make a four way alliance between the kingdoms. The king ends up pissed, but he knew that, he knew the conciquences and did it anyways. He dosent wish for those he travels with to end up dead. That's his number one rule. Don't. Die.

Courage is also quite the thing, I mean, he does often backtalk the king. Even gets the courage to go trough with his betrayal towards his father because of the change of loyalties.

Strength is probably not his strongest suit. But he is still very strong. He isn't apart of the military, but he has been able to fight off pirates and multiple of them at once. He could probably bring Gilbert out into a draw in a physical fight. But he isn't the strongest emotionally. He hides what he actually feels, pretends that he dosent care about the ones he cherishes the most, dosent cry when he needs to. He can't do it. But he can do it for things that will show in the long term, he wants to help Rio become what he sees as strong, so that he won't have to be hurt. He helps Emma be able to express herself freely instead of being happy 24/7. He supports those who wouldn't have the money to chase their dreams.

Adaptability is a strong suit for him. He may also lose out to Gilbert in this area, but that dosent matter. He adapts quickly into the situation with Emma since Gilbert was the one to figure out first she was Belle, so one less job for him to do. He proposes a tight deal on the first draft and makes extra so that Obsidian would agree aswell over the original plan. Makes sure that the two people he cares about the most is away from the shithead of a king.

All in all, Silvio is a good boyo and I love him alot-

[freya-howlett]

Gloomy issues - Inside Hyrule Series pt. 5

Content: With new places to explore, there's new enemies waiting for you.

Author's note: kinda longer than expected, but I really like bickering today. Got inspired by a Tiktok I saw once, but can't find it and can't remember the username :( I'll give credit as soon as I find it.

Y/N. No shipping, simple draft.

Inside Hyrule series is a a series of oneshots, in no particular order about YOU in the world of Zelda! Just imagine... how it'd be to have adventures with your favourite hero and princess? How it'd be to travel alongside Link? Do not expect a cool, intricate plots, it's just something to help you (and me by writing and imagining it) to relax and have a nice moment.

Divider by: chachachannah (Tumblr)

"Look! How do I look?"

You turned around and saw Link trying on a familiar green cap. You laughed.

"Silly," you answered. You approached the chest where Link had found the cap as he bent down to take a small piece of paper lying on the bottom.

"It reads: 'According to legend, this cap was crafted for a hero who travels the wild lands'," he then removed the cap to observe it. "It's weird but wearing it just feels so right."

Yeah, 'cause you did in a past life in a different era, you thought to say, but remained quiet. Link this time, however, had more questions.

"So, you met other heros of legend, didn't you? Was this one real?" he inquired.

"He was," you nodded, crossing your arms non-chalantly. You remained silent for a moment because, being honest, the presence of that cap was confusing. It should't be there at all. That time was, literally, a different time, a different alternative for the future. Or that's what you thought. Maybe you were wrong. No worth mentioning anyways. You shrugged visibly. "He was the one I traveled with before you."

"Oh," he exclaimed, amazed, taking the cap off and observing it as it may hold some secrets. "How long ago was that?"

"I mean, it's now a legend, I can only imagine how long it was."

Link shook his head, astonished.

This conversation was going to dangerous places. Talking about the reality of things wasn't in any way your desire, but you also understood the curiosity. You used what was true inside his world: you were someone meant to help the wielder of the Sword that Seals the Darkness or hero of prophecy whenever he needed it, no matter the time, era or world. This Link was particularly interested in learning more, and he was aware that there had been multiple heros before him, but he didn't know it was him in different versions. He didn't need that knowledge. He also got inquisitive about your age once, a natural question since his perception was that you've been alive for thousand and thousands of years. You found an easy answer to that:

"I just age slower," you responded as you shrugged. "Way, way slower. But I'm about the same as you."

Surprisingly, that answer satisfied his curiosity, only for that moment at least.

"C'mon, I'm hungry, why don't we camp or something right here?" you asked, trying to change the subject.

"In this massive skeleton?" he asked, motioning towards at his feet. You were standing in the jaw of a massive creature.

"I meant on the ground, but yeah," you responded. "It can be a safe cover, don't you think?"

"Hope those Horriblins don't come back," he mentioned as he effortlessly jumped down and removed the new cap.

The place maybe wasn't the best to eat, but the food was delicious regardless: steamed tomatoes and some honey candy the Hateno children kindly gave you. However, despite the nice lunch, you both had to keep on the move. You hadn't found the zone's Lightroot yet, so the area was pitch black and dangerous. Your only source of light was some brightblooms you both had gathered and Link's Miner's Armor top and trouses he decided to bring. It was such a spectacle.

"I still think you look ridiculous with that," you teased him.

"You're just jealous you aren't brave enough to wear it," he answered sarcastically, gathering his stuff to keep on traveling.

"C'mon" you chuckled.

You and Link walked under the skeleton through it's lenght, maybe it had something interesting under it. The chains on Link's outfit didn't make as much noise as you thought at first, even in that extremely silent spot. As ridiculous as it looked, you had to admit that costume was quiet useful.

"Be careful with that gloom," Link's voice was low. In the Depths, it was for the best to not make as much noise as possible to not alert the creatures living there who could see you way before you could. So most of your trip had been in silence except for the small 'picnics' and resting spots, and that after making sure the surroundings had no undesired companions.

"Ugh," you expressed when the sole of your boot touched a bit of gloom, which was a disgusting, thick, mud-like substance all over the place. It's life-draining characteristic made it extremely dangerous, but a tiny bit wouldn't do harm at all.

The steep was large and difficult to walk on, but you both kept on walking carefully so as not to fall on the gloom and your spear helped you with its support. A squishy soft sound caught your attention behind you and you stopped to turn while Link kept on walking. Maybe a Horriblin had decided to sneak behind you through the gloom, after all they were immune to it. However, there was no one.

"Something wrong?" Link asked in a whisper.

"No, it's fine," you murmured back and continued walking. Not even two steps more when the sound was there again and you knew it wasn't just a coincidence.

When you turned, you saw the gloom was... moving? bubbling? fuming?

"Hey, Link," you patted his arm to caught his attention. "What's...?"

Before you finished your question, some weird-looking long tentacles appeared from the disgusting dark mass, towering you both. The gloom, you realized, was moving with them. Before Link or you could even react, the tentacles faced towards you and let out a phantasmagoric screech that penetrated your whole body and mind.

You saw with horror those weren't tentacles, but hands with eyes in their palms. Your scream was combined with their high piercing shriek.

"Run!" Link yelled as he took your hand and ran towards the path you were heading originally. The steep made it hard to run, however you both managed to be faster than the horrible creatures following you.

"Should't you fight those things!?" you yelled as you fought hard as you could to keep on with Link. His pull, however, was helpful.

"They're made of gloom! Do you want me to die!?" he answered.

"No, but what the hell are they!?"

"Shut it and run!"

Outrun them was proven a tiring effort, it took a good distance for them to suddenly dissolve and dissapear. Your left side hurt in a stabbing ache and you were out of breath. As soon as you were free, you threw a brightbbloom seed to the ground and fell, gasping for air.

"For the Goddess..." you said wearily. Link wasn't really affected by the race, he was still standing, patting his outfit. "I've never seen something like that."

"Me neither," he answered, distracted.

"I don't want to encounter them ever again, they were so scary," you continued. They were very similar to enemies you found before: Dead Hands, Wallmasters and Floor Masters. You always found them disgusting, creepy and horrible.

Link didn't answer you, he was still patting his clothes, this time looking more worried. You arched your eyebrows: "Is something wrong?"

"My cap," he answered, facing you with a troubled expression. "I may have forgotten it back at the skull."

You stared at him with an open jaw, astounished. You knew what he was implying.

"No," you shook your head. "Oh, no, no."

"Please! I won't leave it there! It's special!"

"You only had it for like ten minutes."

"Those were some special ten minutes!" When you didn't buldge, he kneeled besides you and took you by your shoulders impressively tightly. You mouthed 'ouch', but Link kept on talking: "C'mon! We don't have to fight whatever those things were, we can just slip past."

"Slip past how?" you questioned, frowning.

"We can climb the steep. They were on the bottom part, we just have to climb the rock to go around them. Didn't you realize they heard or felt us because we passed right by their gloom? Maybe we can avoid them by going on the upper side, quietly and all done. I get my cap and we're all happy."

"Me happy as in what? What do I earn going in there with you?"

"My happiness," he insisted with a funny tone. "You've said so yourself, you came here to help me and your help is what I need at this moment."

"To recover a dusty, old cap you yourself forgot," you raised your eyebrow, your tone remained ironic. "A cap that's completely useless."

"I won't lend it to you if you keep insulting it."

You let out a sigh and removed Link's hands from you. You knew you had no choice at all, after all, he was right and you came to that world to help him, despite the stupidity of the situation. Your own Purah Pad was heavy in your hip, how easy would be to just use it and leave that awful place! But once Link made his mind about something, he didn't retreat.

"Okay," you answered, resigned. "If I get killed, I won't forgive you."

You had to calm your breathing the walk back, soon you reached a part you both could climb, way faster than you wanted.

"I'll be right beside you," Link whispered, animating you. "As long as we're quiet, we'll be fine."

You only nodded and gulped. The rock was easy to climb and you moved sideways to advance, with Link at front, guiding the way. The brightblooms you threw in the lower path were still there, so that was comforting in some way to not be completely engulfed in the darkness. This time the weird hands wouldn't take you by surprise at least.

You saw the pond of gloom and noted that it wasn't moving at all, still and deceitful as before. Carefully, you and Link moved hands and feet to advance.

Beeeeeeeep!

Your heart sank to your stomach. Your Purah Pad was vibrating on your hip.

"Hi, Y/N!" Pura's lively voice was heard, you recognized it as a voicemail. "Bet you're busy right now since you're not answering my messages!"

Link stared at you in horror, he held himself with a single arm as he tried to reach for your Purah Pad. The creepy hands below let out a screech.

"Like this new feature? Thought it'd be a nice surprise. You can now hear my voice wherever you are!"

Link managed to take your Purah Pad, the screen glowed and illuminated his face, but it was too late. A hand took you by the ankle to pull you with unbelivable strenght and you gasped.

"Say hi to Linky for me!"

Link growled and let go of the Purah Pad, which fell loudly to the gloom-covered ground, to hold your wrist and try to pull you up. The hands were relentless and you felt another one pull your other leg.

"Bye-bye!"

An anormous hand took you by your upper body and pulled you away without much effort. Link exclaimed something behind you, but you didn't hear him. In your vision there was only gloom and yellow eyes as your energy was being drained away. You struggled and tried to fight back, but the hand holding you was too strong. You gasped for air, it's hold strangling.

An arrow passed by you and you saw Link standing with his bow ready. The hands snapped and let you go, dropping you like a sack.

"Y/N! Move!" Link exclaimed as he shot another arrow.

You dragged yourself as far as you could, your hands and knees getting scratched by the dirt. You lungs weren't working at all, no matter how much you tried to keep the air inside, they didn't process it. There were explosions behind you, Link was definitely using bombs. You took your hand to your chest as you hid behind one of the bones.

There was another detonation but your ears were already ringing.

"It's over!" you heard Link yell and his hurry steps approaching. "It's over! They're done," his voice went lower as he got close and kneeled in front of you. He put his hand on your forehead. "You're so pale."

Your eyes weren't on him, but looking in the pool of gloom that haven't gone away. It was still moving.

"Link," your voice sounded so hoarse, lacking air, as if you had been strangled. "No, look," you pointed exactly where some red smog was grouping together into a human-looking form. Your friend expression changed to anger when realizing it wasn't over.

"Why can't that shit let us be?"

"Take this," you motioned towards your spear. You didn't have to say it for him to understand: it was better to fight that new enemy from afar.

"And you this," he said as he lend you a small packet he had on his pouch. "Eat it, will make you feel better."

As he walked decisive, you opened the small cloth to see some crackers. But they didn't seem like normal crackers, these ones were glowing slightly in golden. Sundelion crackers. As you bit into one slowly, for you were nauseous, you wondered how Link got them.

Starting to feel revitalized, you turned to see how Link was doing. The monster had weapons of its own and was trying to charge to Link, but he was faster and moved just in time to strike mortal blows to the unprotected side of the enemy. Link this time was definitely fighting with all his might and the battle didn't take much longer. The monster fell to his knees as Link stared at it without any emotion on his face, then it tried to reach one more time to him with its creased, bony hand before succumbing and dissappearing. You let your head fall behind, leaning on the bones, in relief.

"Now it is gone," Link spoke as he approached. He wasn't even out of breath. Aside from your spear, he was carrying another weapon and two weird purple and red lumps that looked disgusting. "Look, it dropped this."

"I won't touch that," you pulled a face, feeling nauseus just by having those lumps in front of you. "They smell weird."

"Better take them to Purah and see what they are," he said as he put them inside his pouch. He let the weapons on the ground and helped you raise to your feet. "And maybe we should also talk to her about that new feature she did. How are you feeling?"

"Better," you answered, shaking the dust from your clothes. "It seems they drain energy when in contact, just like gloom," you explained. "Thanks for the crackers."

"You're welcome," he said, studying the new weapon he had taken again from the ground, he started to give some steps to the path where you came from but you stopped him.

"Hey, your cap's over there," you pointed with your spear towards the another direction.

"Oh, yeah! The cap!"

"Don't tell me you forgot."

"Well, I was concentrating in saving your life, so I didn't exactly forget."

"You were the one who made me risk it anyways!" you exclaimed. "And you forgot!"

"I didn't!"

"Oh, yes, you did, you were gonna leave just like that without it! I honestly should've let you."

"As a reward for going back with me, you can use it all the way back to the Research Lab. It's either that or hold the pouch with those lumps that fell from the gloom monster."

"Disgusting," you muttered.

"And... I actually think they're moving," he checked his pouch.

"Ewgh, no, I'm outta here," you said, walking a bit faster. Link chuckled behind you.

"I was just joking."

"Go to hell."

"With all the wandering spirits and life-draining monsters around here, technically we're there already," he chuckled again and you squinted your eyes towards him.

[corruptionasart]

I followed for video game corruptions. Don't think I've seen much of those of late.

damn sorry i'll make sure you get a refund

Anyway i'm also gonna go ahead and lump this in here since it's related:

So I'll forgive people for either coming in late to the party or just not paying attention to how this blog has changed over the years but I've spoken several times in the past about how rom corruption over time has become really boring to me. That's why over the past few years I've posted less and less of it.

Back when I started doing this stuff and really committed to it back in like 2016-2018 it was great, I started this blog as an excuse to do more of it, playing retro games and breaking them was, and honestly still is a lot of fun. Unfortunately I made the mistake of running a queue which meant I needed things to fill that queue which meant I was essentially turning art into content, and over time that took its toll and I burnt out hard on it. There was a point where basically all my free time was spent on some aspect of running this blog, whether it was playing the games or going through recordings to make gifs or tagging posts etc.

Over the past couple weeks actually I've been going through all my old ShareX screenshot folders (btw i wholeheartedly endorse sharex it rules and i donate to its patreon) I've been collecting all the screenshots I've made of rom corruptions (somehow I hadn't done this before) and what I've noticed is exactly what I noticed all those years ago, it's kinda all the same.

You might disagree with that but again I've been seeing this stuff for like 8 years now and there's only so many times I feel like I could post something like that before it gets stale, the same goes with the gifs and videos. Again, I do enjoy making that stuff but I just feel like I personally feel like I need to make a change.

I'll get into the AI part of what I said this morning in a following post but I should be a bit more clear that the collage stuff I've been doing and anything else that I plan to do in the future isn't meant to be entirely about showcasing ai art or glorifying it, it's just another piece of the puzzle. I mostly made the post about ai stuff mostly because I wanted to see what the reaction would be in this community to that specifically. I wasn't expecting the "anything that isn't rom corruption is off-topic and shouldn't be posted on this blog" contingent. I may very well make another blog just about the ai stuff because I think there are things I could talk about with it with regard to pushing against the tide of garbage and making something new with it, idk yet.

THe last thing I want to say regarding rom corruptions specifically, though, is that it's interesting to me that despite the fact that I've posted the link to the corruption wiki multiple times now and people clearly do have an interest in this stuff that hardly anybody is out there posting this stuff either here or anywhere else online (at least outside of the Vinesauce community, which I feel goes for a very different vibe in what they do.)

The tools are out there, they haven't really changed all that much for years apart from being supported for more modern systems, and yet nobody's posting anything.

Maybe I should make another proper tutorial on my whole process, try to push harder to get people to make stuff.

Sorry if this response is kind of incoherent, I've been called away a lot in making this, I'll try to make the next few posts shorter

[lady-ashfade]

To be fair to that anon with a great request idea.

They probably sent it to a few as not all write the requests. Which is fair. You guys are the writers you guys get to chose what the hell you want to write.

I don’t think there is anything wrong with sending it to a few so long as you can link it to the request. That then shows how you were sent it if another writes their own idea for it too.

Plus being able to compare and see how different or how each writer might have been on the same wavelength for ideas is cool.

The only ones in the wrong are the muppets who think it is okay to send threats to people. They are the pricks. Not you, the writers or the anon, the person who wants an idea wrote out by multiple awesome writers.

You are valid in what you said but at the same time don’t take it out on request blogs/anons who just want to see their fave writers write what they thought of and see it brought to life by your awesome writing. Plus like I said above some ignore requests and some just don’t want to write that request which is fine. But that is why they send it to more than one.

I don’t mean to be a bad person here. Or a prick. I am going to be a prick to the jackarses though who think sending threats is something that should be done. You lot can feck write off. Let people enjoy writing what they want, let writers write a request that was sent to many and see how different but wonderful they could all be.

Anyway I am sorry this is so long. I hope it makes sense. You and anon = good, pricks who send threats which is why you wrote what you did = shitheads.

I hope you have a nice day and I look forward to reading more of your awesome fics. (I do hope one day you may decide to write what the anon wrote as it sounds like a wicked idea and with your amazing writing it would be so so so damn good, again it’s up to you. I understand if you don’t want to).

Have a good Sunday 😁

No I get where you’re coming from for sure. I hope one day we can all do the same requests.

But if I had wrote the request and didn’t see that someone else with a bigger platform did it- I’d most likely getting threats.

This is not mine, but a lovely person @starless-nightz

I am really upset that people do this is, which is why I put it in my rules. Which someone should always read. I was completely upset. I am valid in my feelings because I know first hand what things like this can do.

Link here for the post of someone doing something similar to someone else.

The problem with sending it to a few writers, it doesn’t go over well. If I didn’t see my FRIEND make it then who knows if someone else got it and they got hate, or me, or someone else.

And I already have a idea similar to that. But I will never write that request to show peoples that it’s completely wrong. I’m not mad at you lovely Anon! But theses things can’t be easily fixed. People need to learn. Also I’m not okay with writing what someone else has done for this reason. That’s a big no no in this community and I, and others feel strongly.

Anon might not have meant harm. But they could cause harm. And it’s in my rules-

Anyone sorry if I came off as a asshole but this really needs to be said. I’m so tired of seeing people get hate. It makes me really upset. But you’re lovely, and I also hope to do what you said in the future and get your point of view and wish- that we all can do asks. I just find it disrespectful.

Also if they weren’t Anon i would have messaged them privately instead of what I made.

I’m sorry to the person who sent that request, but it’s not something to do when many others with the same rules for requesting get ignored. I’m happy to talk to them privately and explain. But I will never, and I mean never be afraid to speak my mind.

Sorry if I seem like a asshole again, this message has made me cry and feel overwhelmed.

Edit: I am over having a panic attack- anon I love you and you’re really nice. I will try and be a better person

[broodsys]

yelling into the void

my biggest issue lately is a deep fear about my future being uncertain. i'm very disabled, i'm easily fatigued, and i know i wouldn't be able to do any kind of "typical" job, although i might be able to do a full-time office job, but it'd wear on me a lot at the same time, esp re: getting there and back

but i don't think that, realistically, i can just... avoid having a job. i need to work

and part of my big spiral lately is that i recently found one job that actually seemed feasible, and, bonus, like something i'd actually enjoy doing and had some experience with. i knew it was unlikely that i would get it, but i still hoped, y'know? i just really wanted this one thing to go my way. but, no. got rejected for it. and i've been really bad about applying around, but it feels so pointless, y'know? like there was a time i was submitting 40+ apps and getting nothing. so now i'm being choosier and trying to do better at them but it's still getting me nowhere

and i'm just. really scared and exhausted and demoralized

i've thought a lot about applying for disability, but there are a lot of limitations if i go that route. plus it would be a Process and i'll probably get denied multiple times and may have to fight to retain my coverage and all these other things

and yknow. unmedicated adhd sucks. it sucks! i have so much trouble doing shit but i'm wary of getting medicated rn because of the shortages and all, and i honestly think it'd be worse for me to find something that works and have it be taken away than to continue on with all my weird structures and routines that sorta-kinda work

add to that a lot of continuing tensions in my household, a lot of... i won't get into it, but health risk factors also in my household... and a serious inability to prepare food and eat well regularly that isn't even so much linked to my disabilities as it is to my family situation, it just sucks. it's hard af and there doesn't seem to be a way out except a job... which i can't get

and what's extra frustrating is that i actually want to work. i think having a job, so long as it's something i can do wrt my disabilities, would help me a lot, even aside from relieving the fear. i do much better with external structure. i try to build my own strict routines and that does help, but external stuff has always worked better for me. i've thought about returning to school but finaid is already a little :/ about giving me more money bc i've gone through the dental assisting program only to immediately return to school to get my BA, plus honestly i wouldn't even know what to do besides use school as an intermediary external structure

but i want to work. i want to do things. and in an ideal world, i want a job that lets me help - people, the environment, whatever, just to do some good. i want money that i can donate to causes. i want to have a sense of even relative security in my life and future. and i can't get that by doing nothing but holy shit doing anything feels so pointless rn

so yeah, that's the biggest, most immediate hurdle i gotta get over now. have to pick up my hope or at least my stubbornness and try again and fail again and try again anyway and it sucks so much and i'm so tired but there's no alternative

[ofstormsandfire]

OH OH sages of the calamity if you will…

I will indeed!

so. spoilers ahead for both botw and hyrule warriors: age of calamity if you want to avoid them. like, the Main Plot Twist of age of calamity. also some plot spoilers for the sage quests in totk. putting the rest under a cut o7

sooo. y'know how hyrule warriors: age of calamity had a really fun plot twist of "the people who helped link take on the divine beasts in the botw timeline got brought to the aoc timeline to help save the champions."

(also now that I think about it they might have foreshadowed tulin being your main buddy for the rito questline in totk... because it was teba who came to help revali, tulin just got yoinked by accident too)

the botw timeline, presumably, still exists. and is progressing at roughly the same speed as the aoc one.

imagine, if you will, that a repaired terrako Notices Something's Up There. passes this info on. and, well, the champions are well aware that they'd be dead without help from the warriors of that future.

they can help! (also, they're like. the only ones who can help due to something something "things get a little weird if you have multiple versions of the same people in the same world for long, we're lucky it worked out at all with the sidons")

(...I may be planning to try and use that plot point to bring back the main timeline's champs? maybe. if I can make it work and it doesn't feel narratively unsatisfying to me. We Shall See.)

anyway. when link wakes up on great sky island, he wakes up with terrako there. he's confused. rauru is confused.

he gets A Lot More Confused (and so does tulin) when they're midway through the rito questline and aoc revali comes crashing in (somewhat reluctantly) to help.

(also - unsure if I want to go this route, but it's entirely possible that the people who went to the aoc timeline straight up Don't Remember their time there. maybe they never remember it. or maybe they remember it again once they run into the other timeline's champions. there are a lot of loose threads I have yet to figure out but it would be a really cool fic y'know?)

highlights include -the climb up to colgera being Much Less Of A Hassle thanks to revali's gale. when he can be convinced to use it, anyway. -daruk might show up a bit early specifically because I want him to see yunobo being Weird. (and also I think it would be funny if link had to drag him away from the marbled rock roast he might be too old to eat anyway) -there is so much fucking crying between sidon and mipha and dorephan. I don't think :) she can heal :) dorephan's injuries :) I also think it would be funny if she showed up to help with the sludge like at mipha's court and then Turned Around. -fun fact! riju can die during the gibdo assault on gerudo town. it's fucking heartbreaking. she drops to one knee like urbosa did during the aoc cutscene and everything. I think the ~parallels~ of urbosa showing up Just In Time would be fun. also, like, more lightning where gibdos are concerned cannot be a bad thing -throughout the fic zelda is in contact with the champions via terrako. totk link really wants to talk to her and then just kind of starts crying once he does.

so yeah uh. another fic that would be really cool if I had more solid ideas for it lol (and if ao3 would separate the damn botw and totk tags like they should have to begin with-)

[thenwethrowitonthefire]

hello.

reading your answer to the last ask made me feel warm, I had read it multiple times and each time after I lied down, zoned out, letting myself to feel or smile at certain parts (like where you talked about Russell and calling him peter pan. good nickname:)).

reading your share of story and even others on tags touched me deeply. you were right about to feel 'they get it' btw, it put me at ease how you or others get what I said. I was a little worried about misinterpretion about last ask I sent, so you can guess how I felt by the answer, when I got a long touching answer where you were talking with passion about sparkstember (and any other things about sparks)

I had watched the links you sent me and the concert in 2014 was a real masterwork in another level, their performance shook me by core to the point i wished I could go back in time and get ticket for it (if tim traveling was real(or is it real?) watching sparks on London hall would be def on my list)

in the end thanks for giving me hint about the sparkstember, I checked it out and would like to participate(not sure how much of it probably not all of it but I want to try) plus I'm not worried about my anon mask, at least not anymore. rather keeping it because I find joy on looking for my answer rather than I get notification. beside I think you had figured who am I long time ago(unless you haven't so I would eat cake to that)

Hey, I am really glad it made you feel that way :) You can bet other people felt the same way reading what you wrote, me included! It's never stopped being special to me, that we've got Sparks and this lovely fandom.

... that 2014 concert is one that makes me wish for time travel too. I'd definitely go see it again ✨ Something that doesn't come across at all in videos is how beautiful the lights in the hall were as well, it was just stunning in every single way, absolutely magical. (I'd also go see some 21x21 shows, the Exotic Creatures Of The Deep show, and Balls. But the great thing is that the thing I'm most excited about is the shows the future holds 💖 No time travel necessary 🌞)

I had indeed figured out who you were some time ago, but I'm all for letting people eat their cake ^^ So you can be anon on here for as long as you like :) I've really been enjoying your asks and I'll always continue to have a million things to say about Sparks and their work. So yeah, inbox is always open.

Anyway, I really look forward to seeing you around with Sparkstember! Also (and this goes for anyone who may be reading this): don't worry if you're not familiar with some of Sparks work yet. There is so much to explore with Sparks and it's a beautiful thing to take your time with! It doesn't matter how much you know or don't know, or how long you've been around: if you like Sparks you like Sparks and that means you have a place here. (Even after 12 years I'm still learning new things! It's great!)

I couldn't decide on my parting gift for there is too much to choose from, and so today... I'm giving you memes :)

Number 1, number 2, number 3 and number 4.

Also there's a little special day coming up for the Sparks fandom in... 4 days. (Don't worry, you don't need to do anything or look anything up. You'll see it on your dash when the time arrives, can't miss it 🌞)

------

Edit: wait here's the parting gift for this ask! (Maybe you've seen it already by now but it's just really nice anyway.)

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by S P A R K S (@sparks_official)

[advancedpottery217x2]

Love even unto its innermost parts

I consider myself a romanticist. It happened suddenly a few years back, when I found that this word fit what I consider to be important in fiction. If I just said this out of the blue one day however, people would probably get the wrong idea about me. I do have a general fondness for both ロマン and romance in fiction, and I also feel those two are connected while still being separate entities.

I've wanted to write about my stance on romance in fiction for a long time (since the Mitsumei post that's now uhhh two years ago apparently), and I did say in my Sakura no Toki post that I would expand on my concept of ロマン in a future post. While these topics are quite similar and I have no qualms about it myself, it still felt "wrong" to group them together without a further idea connecting them besides the label of romanticism. Until this March when I actually got that idea and right now when I finally decided to write this post.

This post will probably make even less sense than my previous ones since it is almost completely born from my personal views on abstract concepts, so don't feel bad if you don't understand.

(NOTE: Views expressed in this post do not necessarily reflect my view on relationships in real life. Also not a spoiler-free zone for anything.)

In my mind romanticism is たった一つの大切な想いを貫くこと.

(No the Gunslinger Girl song did not lead to this thought although I will link it here anyway because I love the manga which you should go read right now.)

To understand this we must first separate love projected from within the self and love projected towards the self.

Love projected from within the self is what you personally find important to yourself and ideals, convictions you wish to share and experience with others. It is what you like and what you consider crucial to understanding your personality and beliefs. It is important to realize that this is a form of love.

I guess this is more of a problem in recent years where media consumption as a set checklist with guidelines is more prevalent, but I believe that is an antithesis to the nature of love. This may seem like a given, but life is possible to live without having a solid idea of these things, giving birth to people who cannot use their own words to express their opinions. I believe being selfish is an important part of love as love cannot exist without two distinct entities whose emotions come within the self.

Love projected towards the self is a fictional work's backbone, or the thoughts that went into it during its creation. How this gets conveyed to the self varies depending on the medium but ambience is important in all of them. Ambience is felt from every corner of a work so the stronger the backbone is, the more it shows in multiple facets of the work (総合芸術). Of course, not everything has the luxury of having a singular vision so this concept is not necessarily tied to a work as an entirety; feeling love from singular part(s) is not any lesser.

The message a work conveys (if it exists), willingly or unwillingly is only one part of this love. I believe you can feel it in anything, from a character's spoken and unspoken words to intimate depictions of backgrounds. Personally, music is a big one for me and is the reason I am an Aquaplus fan now. It doesn't have to be straightforward either, if anything being drawn to things that appear contradictory is proof of ロマン in and of itself. The act of using your own experiences to process and accept two clashing senses within you is a sort of 原体験 of realizing the self and the world are separate entities that operate on their own merits which brings me to my main point.

The moment the loves within and without the self meet (貫く) is the moment the feeling of ロマン is born.

You could simply call this finding something the fits you or speaks out to you but this post is about love. The only love you are privy to the most intimate details of is the love that comes from within. This is because unless you can somehow mind link with other people you will never be able to fully understand what goes into their love, even if you are on the same wavelength. That is why we seek love to reach our innermost parts. This is true in real life too but that is outside the scope of this post.

Not everything in the world has the kind of love that resonates with you and sometimes it does not have love at all. That is why it is necessary to acknowledge these truths, to distinguish what does and does not fit you to have conviction in your own love.

Of course this is only true when the levels of love do not overpower each other. If the outward love is too strong, personal ideals overtake the work and color our perception of it to the point where it is no longer recognizable to others. In an internet example, I feel this is the case with people who take their headcanons too far and push them to the point of general acceptance, with some people not even realizing or refusing to realize that they are far beyond the context that the original work has presented. If the inward love is too strong, the work seeps into the psychology of the self to the point of lowering a person's ability to form their own thoughts on it. Another more personally aggravating internet example are those eroge reviews on Japanese Twitter that basically write the same points and have the same game quote peppered in. This is not to say these cannot exist (as much as I don't want them to), but they are simply not ロマン.

How does one go about in search of their ロマン then? As I said before, selfishness is an important element. Reading recommendations and reviews is valuable in gauging if you will enjoy something. However if that is all you rely on, it is easy to lose sight of your outward love. It is important to balance these with your ability to pick out things in the wild. After all, between ロマン discovered through others and ロマン discovered yourself the latter has more ロマン度. If you find it hard to broaden your horizons, seeing what your friends that have common interests and common reasons for liking those interests also like is a good start. The latter is especially important in the ロマン department as finding things that hit in that regard is harder than simply finding things you will enjoy.

Simply finding things to enjoy is also a skill one should hone. However, one must understand that something that does not match your love is not something to be shunned or frowned down upon. We are equipped to enjoy many things in life no matter how they relate to us. To that effect I do not associate romanticism with optimism. The act of believing in and finding love in the world is one of the most human actions one can take. That is why we feel such elation at the meeting point of loves. In that moment the beauty of the world enters our hearts we feel at one with something outside of the self and revel in the joys of communication. That is why I cannot stop my pursuit of ロマン.

たった一つの大切な想いを貫くこと is more straightforward in the romance department. As outlined in the ロマン section, romance also arises from two distinct entities whose emotions come within the self. That is why being able to see how both people come to hold romantic feelings and the moment those feelings become mutual feels victorious. Unless you are a devout romance hater or fan of a losing character in a romcom, seeing two characters get together is a cause of celebration.

And there's the rub: The outward trappings of romance are discussed much more than the intricacies of their feelings.

I can enjoy lighthearted will-they-or-won't-they, tension caused by unrequited love, and dramatic events fighting against the odds as much as the next guy but my eyes always remain on the prize: the actual feelings two people hold for each other.

Until recently I was vaguely in the camp that romances with obstacles in their path are the most rewarding at the end. It's a popular sentiment, so you can't go wrong with it right? It is quite sound as if the feelings in the relationship are not strong enough they won't make it to the end. But as I felt increasingly aloof with a lot of those stories I started to think that my true interests lied elsewhere.

The truth lies in たった一つの大切な想いを貫くこと. What causes people to develop feelings for another person? How do these feelings remain and grow stronger as opposed to fizzling out? How far are you willing to go for another person? How do these feelings interact with your own set of values, your own love to the world? Yes, true love is born when a character's love from the self and their love for another person harmonize, resulting in たった一つの大切な想いを貫く in their actions. That is the love I seek with my entire body.

Since there is no requirement to go this deep most of the time it is possible to be satisfied with much less. In some cases less can be more, and to reiterate I am not saying that only one kind of thing should exist. I simply wish for people to think more about the characters' feelings for each other when discussing fictional romance rather than on the playground level of who likes who.

Too often are romances lauded or condemned for reasons other than this. An all too familiar internet example is people throwing around certain parts of a relationship as problematic. Is it so fucked up to value a fictional relationship based on how the characters feel towards each other... But on the other hand you have people who value those certain parts above all else. I'm looking at you people who think incest routes in eroge are the best even if there is no other meat to the relationship regardless if they are blood-related or not. I guess if you're there for the outward trappings alone I can't blame you for getting exactly what you want but going around spouting about how it's a purer form of love is a completely different story. In eroge I feel surface level romance discussions are even worse because sex scenes can fool people into thinking something is deeper than it actually is.

As scenario writer Hozumi Kei wisely stated in a BugBug interview:

──今聞いてもワクワクしてきますね。 保住：美少女ゲームって、実は「恋愛をちゃんと描かない」んですよ。『ONE』や『ToHeart』の段階で既に確立している手法なんですが、ヒロインは必ず問題を抱えていて、主人公はそこに必ず首を突っ込んで二人で解決する。このことがメインになってしまい、そのついでに二人は恋愛したりセックスしたりするんです。 ──つまり多くの美少女ゲームは「恋愛」をテーマにしていないということですか？ 保住：自分はそう思っています。未だにこの手法で作られている作品がほとんどですよね。それだけ凄いメソッドということですが、そろそろ卒業しなきゃいけない気はしています。 ──『ましろ色シンフォニー -Love is Pure White-』は恋愛を中心にした作品、ということでしょうか。 保住：主人公もヒロインも色々抱えているんですが、その中で恋愛を進めていくことで、物語が進んでいく。その辺りが上手く描けた作品だと思います。ここまでド直球の恋愛作品って、当時中々作れなかったと思うんです。そこに挑戦してくれたぱれっとさんには感謝していますね。

I have played Mashiro-iro Symphony and was impressed with how it put romance at the forefront of Hozumi Kei's routes, even if it wasn't exactly to my taste.

In the end I simply wish for people to embrace love more. Embracing your own love is knowing yourself as best as you can and aiming to find it in the world. Embracing love from the world is acknowledging that many different forms of love exist and there is always exciting new frontiers to be found out there. Embracing the nature of romance is understanding love's great capacity and the way it interacts with the self.

Romanticism is realizing love is a terrifying force, and it is up to the self to give it context in our everyday lives.

ロマンチストなので。

~Bonus Corner~

What are some works I feel exemplify the things I talk about in this post?

I will say everything mentioned in the Sakura no Toki post counts and with the new knowledge in this post let us reexamine this equation:

時間経過(=連続性があること) + ロマン = 刻

Why do I feel ロマン from Sakutoki? Because the love of art is etched into every facet of this work. Through the music, backgrounds, characters, and the various art pieces in the game, art is attacked and affirmed from different angles all in service of the overflowing pathos associated with both creation and consumption. In this regard I like Toki more than Uta.

On a pure ロマン front I consider the Tears to Tiara series to be the pinnacle of it, as evidenced by the fact I made this blog at first to post about it. Marui Takeshi's other works also excel at the element of ロマン as well as Shumon Yuu in Kitto, Sumiwataru Asairo Yori mo,. Years back I changed my VNDB comment for that game to "わかってるなぁ" without really knowing why but the mystery is now solved. I'll get around to his other games someday!!

In the romance department, you know me, I will say Mitsumei. Shipping is a bit more complicated than what I wrote above since depending on how much is actually in the original work there is a lot more imagination required. But the fact that Edgeworth and Franziska have such a relationship that is barely touched upon in official media have led to me thinking about it more than most of the naysayers so I will say what I most want to see of them in official media is them having a heart to heart conversation to further my thoughts. 支離滅裂な思考・発言

Back to the topic at hand I greatly enjoyed ISLAND as a romantic work which really does seem like a rarity amongst the debates I've seen about the science fiction parts of the game. I have wrote about Hakuchuumu no Aojashin before and that is probably the stronger recommendation between the two here. Astraythem was a surprise for me last year in how the time travel plot elevates the themes of love presented in the game and not just for the main relationship. For anime Kaguya-sama wa Kokurasetai: First Kiss wa Owaranai, the latest installment of the series is good for its deliberation of romantic feelings to an extent not seen in most other media. It was kind of funny seeing reactions to it praising that aspect as a novelty when I think about it every day with Mitsumei but that's another story. Need season 4...

I must include a special shout out in this post to Eris from Princess Connect! Re:Dive who kind of destroyed my brain during the game's 6th anniversary event earlier this year.

Eris (CV: Kuwashima Houko) is functionally a clone/copy of one of the main characters Yui (CV: Taneda Risa) who after the events of the previous game (the Ameba soshage) was forced to watch the protagonist loop while stuck in the VR game world countless times with the reset occurring when either the protagonist or Yui died. Of course Yui and by extension Eris hold romantic feelings for the protagonist so watching so many loops gradually destroyed her sanity levels to dust to the point where the only thing she desires is a world with just her and the protagonist. Honestly during this part of the story in the game, I had a passing interest in her but not much in the grand scheme of things since that part felt like a slog to get through while it was updating. In the end Eris disappears after a confrontation between her and Yui.

This event brings proper closure to that plotline while also further establishing Yui and Eris's feelings for the protagonist. This event blew me away because Priconne is a mobile game where a lot of the characters have romantic feelings for the protagonist. But these always felt more like trappings due to being the kind of game where you raise your bond levels with girls like some kind of romance game. Of course it is not a romance game and there are no big depictions (not yet...) except for Yui and that is mainly one-sided since the protagonist is not forward at all in the love department. Even then I felt that Yui's feelings were more of a plot device as they caused Re:Dive to happen and she is too shy to do anything most of the time. That's why seeing Yui and Eris going at each other like a catfight in this event felt like a light from the heavens. The two finally felt like realized characters with romantic feelings instead of two bishoujo with the word "love" stuck to them. Kuwashima Houko's ability to express Eris's pain, longing, bitterness, and faint hope was stunning. You really feel that the weight of her feelings has engulfed her to the point of no return and the event works on processing them in a world where she was not given the mercy of complete death. God please let Eris win. Eris reappeared in the main story in this month's update let's fucking gooooooo.

Lastly, the manga panel from the header image of this post is 恋は忍耐 which I found completely by chance when I saw it had an Ikuhara Kunihiko (Mawaru Penguindrum director) recommendation on the obi. After reading the first chapter online and impulsively buying the first volume on Bookwalker I can understand why. If I hadn't seen that panel I don't know if I would have had the energy to write this post so quickly. Looking forward to the next volumes!

[ask-serendipity-sky]

Tae is kinda very smart for not confirming Taennie lol. Jennie doesn't give af about dating rumors because she already have multiple confirmed relationships, Tae is the biggest celebrity she's ever linked with, her Fandom kinda supports her, she will be hated anyway by others and has nothing to lose. But Tae ? Everything opposite of Jennie's case.

Personally I dont think they'll last until he decides to marry her and I think he feels the same. So why put his career, fanbase and reputation in danger for a relationship that won't last ? That's why there's no 'contribution' from Tae's side to this news lol, if anything he boosts Taekook whenever he can as it holds his fanbase together. Tbh it was a smart decision, if he wasn't dragging tkk to this shit tho. This isn't his first nor last relationship, it's his private thing which he dont wanna confirm to anyone.

I BET IF HE'S MARRYING A WOMAN ONE DAY IT WON'T BE A CELEBRITY, ESPECIALLY A VERY POPULAR BUSY ONE. You know how most SK men generally think about marriage right ? They want someone who stays at home, look after their kids and family, available to spend time with husband whenever he's at home. Tae has said he likes a woman who can be like his mother (its a eww for me tho). Even the regular men are like that so we can imagine how a busy rich celebrity men may want from thier wife lol. Most of korean female celebs who married male celebs either quit work or took long breaks. And Jennie is too big to be just a home maker momma he dreams of and not planning to give up everything to marry him. She has her own career which is almost big as him and is even busier than him. So yeah, I think they'll breakup eventually and find other partners who they can build their ideal future with.

Hello,

Hmmm.

I'm sensing that you don't like Jennie? Lol

I just want to point out that Jennie is probably more known that Tae. She has as much to lose as he does, if not, more. I don't like how people low key shade her and act like she's inferior to Tae. She doesn't need Tae either. She's done well on her own. And she's dated G-dragon...I mean...come on!

I don’t see it like this at all. Taennie is strong AF! I know people judge Jennie for other valid reasons but if you see content of hers (not on stage), she seems very sweet and down to Earth. Nicer than Tae, actually. She's much more likeable and she has a pleasant personality.

I remember a BP live where her and Lisa are decorating a cake and Jennie says that she wants to be able to bake cakes with her children while Lisa says she will just give them money to buy a cake lol

Jennie didn't grow up with her mom either so it seems like she also wants a home and a family. She's is very motherly.

I actually think they are perfect for each other.

If Tae is not confirming, that's because he needs album support from the tkkrs and his fans who don't see right through him but just wait until all this is done. It will be interesting.

Hope this helps.

[multiplicity-positivity]

Look, this is more of a general question that I'd be happy for you and your followers (if they and you feel comfortable) to answer: What is your sense of "self" like and what "type" of system do you consider yourself to be (multiple, median, something more specific, nothing specific, a third secret thing, etc)?

I'm trying to figure out how being plural "looks like" to say if I really am or if what I feel is something different /info

Hey, this is a… really difficult question.

Our sense of self is fragmented, weak, and unstable at best, and missing at worst. Each alter may have a bit of an idea about who they are as individuals (like name, pronouns, memories, interests), but we spend a lot of time in a fog or so checked out that we don’t (or can’t) really think about who we are. It’s taken us a lot of work in therapy and internally to even be able to sign off on these posts lol!

We often feel unreal, invisible, like we’re floating above the clouds, or trapped inside our own mind. Different alters feel and view our depersonalization in different ways, and out sense of self is not universal across the system. Ralsei might firmly know who soft is, what soft wants, and softs role in the system, while Ghost or Alucard (or me!) may struggle to remember our names, who we are as individuals, and where we’re going in life.

Many people with dissociative disorders are able to have enriching, worthwhile careers, but our severe fragmentation of self has kept us from being able to focus on a single track for the future. Kip is drawn towards mental health work, Margo wants us to go into library science, Cecil is fascinated with technology and wants us to pursue a career in IT… and I, the host, don’t know what I want. I feel like I’m always too hazy to learn anything that might help us in a career, I can’t choose between my alters, and past traumas have me believing that we’re not smart enough to do anything besides fast food work anyway (hence, we’re a delivery driver). Hopefully this example demonstrates how our choppy, incoherent sense of self impacts our lives in tangible ways.

As for what “type” of system we’d call ourself: at this point anyone in the system can agree that we are a DID system. That’s how we consider ourselves. Many of us in the system use labels like plural and multiple to describe our system, but not all of us view the system like that. For others, we collectively are “a person struggling with DID.” A person with a disorder, nothing more. These alters do not use plural labels for themselves or the system. In general, the system uses “alters” and “parts” language to describe ourselves and each other. Most of us don’t care for the term “headmate” for our system specifically.

One last thing I’d like to say is that plurality and systemhood look vastly different from system to system. So your experience with plurality may not look like ours at all. You don’t have to have a weak, unstable, or fragmented sense of self to be plural. You don’t have to struggle with depersonalization in order to experience multiplicity. These things often do come as symptoms of dissociative disorders, but not every system has a dissociative disorder.

You can click through some of the links in our post of resources if you’d like to learn more about dissociative disorders and plurality. Many of the websites we linked there include anecdotes and personal accounts from systems, so they might be able to help answer your question.

Sorry if this is rambly or doesn’t make much sense.

💫 Parker

[x-daisy-x]

Hiii Daisy!! Milly’s telling me i might be attracted to woman.. can you tell me more abt that???

-Lia (ooc: can’t ask on side blogs T-T)

Oh hello Lia! Of course, I wouldn't mind trying to help! You can always come and ask me about anything especially stuff like this!

Well, for me it was easier to figure out I was a lesbian because I had two moms and I knew about queerness from a young age, and that girls could love girls and boys could like boys (stuff like that!). So I'm not really sure how it really is for other people with different familial situations, especially ones with homophobic parents.. it can be a lot to learn and unlearn but with patience and time, you can get there someday!

I think one of the most basic questions of this is: who do you see yourself ending up with in the future? A man? Woman? Person? No one? Does it matter? Does it change anything? Can you see yourself with multiple of these people in a lasting relationship? It's ok to just try to sit down and think about it and how you would feel about doing "couply" stuff - like kissing, cuddling, holding hands - but with the same gender, and then see how you feel about it.

It's also important to notice that sexuality is a spectrum! You may despise the idea of kissing anyone but one specific person, or you may like people romantically like a flickering switch; on an off. You may find people attractive, but may not want to date them. And etc, etc. If you find yourself having complicated feelings on this matter, I recommend research! I think I could link some quizzes or articles to you if you need them!

There's a lotttt more to it, and it isn't as simple; but that was the start for me and when I first questioned it and I thought it mightve served as a good start to you too!

Anyway, hope that helped, Lia!! You can always talk to me if you need it, and I wish you good luck on your journey! Even if you don't end up being queer, you may find out something else about yourself! It's really about self exploration and discovery and I hope you the best!

- Love, daisy 💙

[backtothefanfiction]

WIPS & 2024 Plans!

Hey ya’ll. So as hinted at I have a lot of ideas and works in progress so wanted to kind of do a little summary and tease some of the stuff I’m currently throwing around and kind of give and make a plan of action for the coming year regarding my content here.

I finally finished the office kinktober prompt after nearly two months of it being half written as said in the authors note, I am giving up on the idea of kinktober/kink til Christmas altogether. But there are still a few ideas that came from that list I do really want to write which will be included in the future ideas portion of this post but yeah… let’s just start with the current WIPs and what’s gonna come first.

Current WIPS (with summaries)

In order of completion with rough estimate of posting!

Spiders and Lace

1920s Mob Spider-Man Au where Peter starts dating a young socialite in order to get to her criminal brother.

(First Part releasing this December)

The Secrets We Keep

A Jeb Pyre (Under The Banner of Heaven) multi chapter story. Jeb is starting a new job in a new town after the Lafferty case where he meets an old school friend. Both of them are running from their hometown and hiding secrets, but will those secrets crush this new budding romance?

(Series starting in January, date to be announced)

WIPS Currently On The Shelf

These have all either been teased and parts not posted or one or two parts posted then currently abandoned. I have stuff written for these and aim to go back to them at some point I just don’t know if or when.

I Will Always Find You

A multiple part Pedro and Oscar character’s fic featuring different linked AUs looking at the idea of past lives and reincarnating with the same souls.

(I keep picking this up and putting it back down but I love the idea and it means so much to me and I want to do it right, so until I can do it justice, it’s on the shelf.)

Metanoia

When Mando takes on a job to retrieve a kidnapped young senator, the two of them end up on a journey that has Mando questioning his whole way of life.

(I have posted the first chapter of this but may take it down as I don’t know when I’ll go back to this idea and I think I want to adjust it anyway. This is basically just a story to really go into what I wanted from Mando’s journey meeting other mandalorians and how it makes him question his creed seeing how other mandalorians live and getting to really explore that inner turmoil.)

Future/2024 Ideas

Some of these may get written some time next year, some of them may come later, some may never get written at all, but I wanted to share my thoughts anyway.

No Body No Crime

Based on the Taylor Swift song, this is a murder mystery that would feature multiple crossover characters from Dave York (the murdered husband), Joel Miller (the accomplice lover), Jeb Pyre (the detective) and possibly a few other characters from across the Pedro, Andrew and Oscar character lists. I love this song and I do have a whole list of ideas just based on Taylor Swift songs which may become their own mini series with a song for each album, but I really want to write a multi chapter fic based on this song.

Untitled Joel Miller Fic

I already made a post with this idea. Inspired by the Mummy, as I feel Rick O’Connell and Joel Miller give me similar energy. However instead of fighting Mummies we’d be fighting Infected to hunt down different artefacts a particular bookish main character wants to protect and preserve. Think road trips, myths, history and unlikely allies with ridiculous sexual tension.

Triple Frontier Boys One Shot

I’ve been fantasising about a very naughty TF boys one shot which is pretty much straight smut and one rocking night for reader. I did start writing some bits for this a few nights back, but didn’t like it the next day but plan to return to it at some point.

Tis The Damn Season

Another of those previously mentioned prompts inspired by Taylor songs, Tis The Damn Season is a Frankie Morales one shot that may come sooner than we think as it’s an idea set at Christmas. Frankie goes back to visit his parents one time a year and always ends up back at your place on Christmas Eve like your very own Santa Claus.

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So those are my current WIPS, ideas and plans. Let me know which you’re most interested in.

[kwangyadetective]

🔭 The Visions: A Corrupted and Blinding Dream (Phantom)

A theory post discussing about what happened in WayV’s ‘Phantom’ music video and a its possible little connection with Ten’s Birthday.

(!) WARNING: This is a theory as it is not confirmed by SM entertainment nor members of NCT, so please don’t believe this 100%!

I have this little fear inside of me, what if a member will reveal a hint of the lore that happened in the MV :” It will either lead me into making a new post or... I don’t know this is just a theory anyways. But lets get started!

After rewatching the MV for the hundredth time (not just because I love it), I finally got what was happening. I sort of read some theory threads too on Twitter since there is a media reference to this comeback, which is the Phantom of the Opera that unfortunately I don’t really have much knowledge of. But first of all, I’m going to give you a link of the twitter thread I found that discusses the references to the musical, Tweet Thread Link. It actually gave me some ideas when typing this.

 As for this post, I will be talking about the SMCU side.

“Ten the puppeteer, whose evil side is dominating him, nearly has the members in his grasp through a fake dream but Winwin is there to stop it.”

1. Ten’s Wish

You may also read more on this on Ten’s Birthday post.

Although it is still unknown of what he really wanted to fulfill, in both Miracle track video and Birthday MV, he was blowing a candle. Considering his solo title called ‘Birthday’, it is not far-fetched to be connected to the fact that we do make a wish before blowing candles during birthday parties. But this wish is nearly fulfilled and it is apparent by two things; the dream that they are in is an illusion or fake, and some members are affected by it.

“Like a phantom that be pulling my strings

Hey-yo hey-yo, the puppeteer tugs, and

In darkness, the world loses its way”

There were many scenes of Ten, he was even the first to appear in the MV and looked the most villain-like (in a way). Especially that one scene where he walks into the room that the others were already in, it seems he knew the place already. He is the main phantom.

2. Fake Dream

It has been mentioned multiple times that the dream they are in is fake.

“A vile night, but it can’t make real what’s fake”

“Dream is a trickster hiding what’s real”

The members realize that it is not real and the reason it isn’t is because they are wearing the masks.

“See through it all from behind the mask

Only I can see the truth so crazy

Look as if there is no mask

The light of truth was never lost”

“A hazy vision of the future feels only like Déjà vu

An absurd revelation of something fake” Read More at http://lyricskpop.net

“Through the chaos feeding on fear”

This dream they are experiencing too is somewhat dreadful to the members and it surrounds them with their fears. That is somewhat based on what I got from the lyrics too, and it is symbolized by the chandelier which I will be talking about later on.

The Phantom mask from the musical is known to only cover half of the face, and I think this choice is interesting since Ten has a history of being associated with one eye. But in here, the masks that are used cover both eyes which would function properly if its function here is to mask the members from the reality. Unlike in the musical where the mask is used to cover the weaknesses of the phantom, here it is used to blind the members.

3. Hendery

I believe that all members (except for Xiaojun), were already affected by it as seen in one scene where all members were holding Xiaojun in masks but Hendery was definitely the most suspicious one. From the last set of pictures, it was shown that only he and Ten has their pictures somewhat blurred. A theory I made about these blurred pictures from Jaehyun’s Forever Only post is that the member is not being himself or corrupted/ under someone’s control.

From one scene of the MV where there are black cat/panther’s eyes behind him (plus his odd eye), I theorized that it has something to do with Ten because in NCT2018 Yearbook, Ten was holding a black cat... This may need more backing... but another thought is that the animal could possibly have a similar role to the snake that has been around in SMCU. In the end, the masks on his face (oddly he has many) disappeared after Winwin rescued everyone, it may seem like he is the most influenced under the villain (whether it was caused by Ten or just the cat). I also have a speculation there is another story for him which involves Jalapeno... but only the SM staffs and Hendery know that...

4. Xiaojun

It has been theorized by people that Xiaojun has the role of the main protagonist of the musical. It was mentioned that the main protagonist saved herself by either lighting a fire or by a fire that happened(?) and people connected it by this one picture of Xiaojun who was holding some kind of lighter.

Initially I thought this was the same case as NCT127′s Favorite pictures and aespa’s Hallucination Quest pictures where they are in the villain (snake’s) area. However, now I see that instead of Xiaojun being in the grasp of the villain, he is protecting himself. This is pretty evident because he was holding the lighter himself unlike the 127 and aespa’s pictures. This is why he seems to be the only one targeted in the MV because possibly he was the only one left that is not that affected by the fake dream.

5. Winwin

Winwin was the one who break free from the dream, or was strong enough to take action. Something along the lines of that. He shot a dagger to the heart that was chained. There is a possibility that the heart belongs to Ten? If that is the case, does that mean he came back to normal? perhaps we’ll find out about this in the next comeback...

6. Chandelier and Moon

According to the musical, the chandelier is the metaphor of bad omen that surrounded the members with fears which makes this dream to be dreadful (citing this from the Twitter thread). As Winwin shoots the heart with a dagger, it fell to the ground and changed the entire atmosphere of the room. This reveals the real look of the room.

The place where the moon was present, could be a specific area in the Neos’ dreamscape. The moon was red because there was a presence of a villain and turned yellow, which means that it turned back to normal... I think.

The Ending?

It was rather confusing to me because in the end the members wore the masks again and stayed in the room. Unless that was just meant to be in between the scenes and just for a cooler ending, could it be that it ended well? Winwin and Ten were the only ones that wore this mask, so does that mean he’s in the side of good now?... we’ll have to see the next comeback.

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In the end, I love the MV BUT I still can’t believe they didn’t put a SINGLE MIRROR. It was only in Xiaojun’s teaser... and I thought it was the important element but here we are. We’ll see the next part of the story in their next comeback~

[kawaiiers]

This is the worst article I may have ever read. It lies right from the get go. First of all, of course, it's not easier to use, definitely not for me. But I'll get to that point.

"The website looks a bit different — it’s simpler; less cluttered; and, hopefully, easier to use." Yes, because it's "less cluttered" it's harder to use. It's harder to find something that was right there from the get go, in the open! Ctrl+F exists for a reason and now it's been rendered useless. I have no idea why on desktop, where You have all the space in the world, You would hide language changing and other useful links. I get doing it on a phone screen, it's tiny and hard to use, but a desktop screen is exactly the opposite. On desktop You can open multiple links at the same time, You can find links easily and there's enough space to show them. Hiding items just makes me click more and ergo lose more time!

"After three years of development" lol just lol

"The new design is the culmination of years of research, dozens of consultations with movement groups and volunteers, and thousands of points of feedback from Wikipedia readers." Who? Your mothers?

"The updated interface improves readability by reducing distraction and clutter and making pages easier to read" Oh, so people with bad ADHD, I guess. I don't see how a person with a normally functioning brain would have problems with a single sidebar.

"It introduces changes to the navigation and layout of the site, adds persistent elements such as a sticky header" Claim to make the site more user friendly, yet add a sticky element. HILARIOUS. Sticky elements are a million times more distracting than a normal sidebar xD Not to mention they're ugly and annoying all hell. But yes, it's more comfortable to use, ofc

"Our data shows that these changes improve usability, and save time currently spent in scrolling, searching, and navigating – all of which adds up to an easier and more modern reading experience, so that more people will love reading and contributing to Wikipedia." I HAVE made an account on wikipedia after the change indeed. To change the layout back to the good one. Using the new wikipedia every time i use someone else's computer or open it in incognito feels like being skinned. Slow, terrifying and painful.

"In the future, we plan on continuing to listen to our audiences and adapt and improve our experiences based on their needs" youtube talk. Translation: "we plan on making the site more hard to use because we love mocking our userbase"

Anyway modern UX drives me off the internet so I guess it's a good thing after all

[fantomette22]

you’re so right in your art maria having gerhmans babies is the best ending to bloodborne how many would they have? probably gerhman wants many babies 😳😳😳😳

Thank you anon(s) ! (I don’t know it's the same person here??i guess?). Always happy to know people enjoy my ideas & drawings :) ! Especially that one.

Also I’m sorry but I might have understand a few of your sentences a bit weirdly too? so allow me to explain my position on the subject. (+I feel like you’re reducing her to just have kids ahah i don’t really like that. Not a fan of tropes where people just have many kids just to have kids too. But perhaps you didn’t express yourself well)

(So I have multiple differents interpretations of characters relationships at the same times and I like to imagined multiple stories too. In canon. I really don't think anything serious ever happened between them. An if there's indeed romantic feelings involve on one sides or both I don't think it went really far due to the mess in Yharnam and mental states of the characters after the Hamlet.)

While imagining stories, I asked myself many questions : what type of persons the characters were, what they looked like for some... and at some point what's their view of parenthood. Who could have kids if they desire and who couldn't (because pretty sure at least 1 human in the entire of bloodborne is infertile) who would have like and who didn't want to. (I have some thoughts about Annalise on the subject for ex)

We know Gascoigne had children but he's a last generation hunters. I don't feel like many old hunters would have children for ex. Because of the hunt & how uncertain the future was (+the mental disorders & illness the fishing hamlet cause...) it's not the best move to have kids if you get killed afterwards or if the children in question ended up killed...

Also the game not really about babies ? Ok birth/ rebirth (and death) are central themes and there’s Mergo, the orphan, the Vilebloods and all. It’s funny the humans want to become gods but the gods are envious of the humans because they can give birth… so yeah it’s ONE of the central themes with how far humans are willing to go… but i don’t see how that would link to some particular characters wanting lots of kids. ^^’

But well it's headcanons time now.

Concerning Gehrman, I feel like he didn't seriously consider having a family for a huge while because of his way of life but still have a soft spot about the idea to have a lil family of his own. And then consider that maybe he could build smt with Maria 🥲 If he's not an hunter anymore pretty sure he would make the perfect house malewife husband. But i also feel he's more like : "it's ok if we don't have children, we'll just have a dog then." type of guy. Not wanting to push things to fast and don’t really want too many too? Just want his family to be happy (I mean he’s not the one birthing them so he would like to discuss things first xD and he’s scared something goes wrong too.) will actually do a pretty good job at taking care of children i think.

Concerning Maria it's a bit more tricky...well when you look at the characters in the hunter's nightmare and everything you don't get the feeling she would like to actually have/give birth to a child. But it's a nightmare and I still consider the doll as being a lil part of her. She looks genuinely happy to take care a of lil great one in the 3rd ending 🥺 So I fell she might have wanted/like at some point take care of an infant if the conditions were optimum ? I even headcanon that maybe she took care of sick infant at the church/ research hall T_T I tend to makes lot of parallels with myself and Maria so i’m like hm she don’t want to ? Can she even? But maybe she wished at some point too? She don’t want to use blood as a weapon, a way to hurt and kill living being that’s why i think she feel closer to the church mindset about this « sacred medium » : she may think it should be use the blood to heal people, to give life…

SO anyway that drawing is an AU where basically the good hunter said it was "rewind time" and managed to gives a 2nd chance to everyone. (I won't develop too much here but basically the orphan of Kos lived, no RH like we know it and no hunter nightmare and Laurence didn't screw up that bad with the old blood) so they all don’t go mad and don’t develop mental disorders 👍

I love drama and tragedies i think they deserve happiness in the end 😔 (yes it’s my way to cope with the the sad things i imagined too)

As for numbers of children i’m not really the type of person to imagining lots of kids… i really don’t focus my stories on that (this one is an exception and it made me happy 🥺) and when i imagined oc or others stories with kids 3/4 of the time it’s a really conspicuous and responsible choice when they very long discussion about it (that work for this as well)

I know at the 19th century used to have generally lot of children (the grandparents of my grandparents were like 10…) but in Bloodborne & soulsborne games it feels like people who have kids have like 1 or 2. (Exception for Elden Ring with 3 siblings from the same parents! And even more with the half siblings yoooo!)

So basically i thought of 2 lil kids for now. (Perhaps 3 with an adopted one) but add one more if you count the dog xD

I have differents scenarios how things went (but haven’t have everything settle yet) but here they are in a lil house, next to the forest, and next to a village. A bit far from Yharnam (taking time for them but also still working for the church? But i had an ideas where they stayed in Yharnam too?) Hm i don’t know, i have a few ideas but i won’t in details here.

So i’m glad to have found the courage to actually draw & share it. It just melt my heart every time i look i it…(best thing to fall asleep in a good mood!)