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#anyway do not perceive my ramblings.
buqbite · 30 days
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Halo
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iraprince · 8 months
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Hiii, i love your stuff and kinda from a distance really look up at you for, in my perception, being able to express yourself without giving a fuck. Thats sick dude, Im so so afraid, of absolutely everything, its nice to think like i might grow into someone less apologetic of my existence. Nice to see people just being yknow
hey, thank you, this is really really nice. the secret that is probably not a secret is that i am also deeply afraid a lot of the time lmao -- but less than i used to be, and in ways that feel less stifling and self-suffocating, if that makes sense.
like, it used to be "i'm scared that if i express myself the way i want to, everyone will find me obnoxious, so let's just sand those edges down to be safe" -- now my fears are more like "now that i'm expressing myself in a way that feels natural and real, i'm afraid that it's all stupid/vapid/not worthwhile or meaningful" (<- specifically abt my art) or "i'm happy that i talk and act the way i want to now, but what if it makes me impossible to befriend," etc etc etc. which still feels bad and puts me in a funk a lot of the time but at least it's a fear that comes After/in reaction to doing stuff, rather than a fear that STOPS me from doing stuff, you know? like, it's evolved into a kind of fear that's less in my way.
anyway. i believe you'll experience something like this, because wanting to grow is the first step of growing. the fact that u hope or wish for something different means you're already on your way. to fewer fucks!! or at least distributing the fucks u give in a way that serves u better
#stuff like accepting that i'm reserved and i'm not very accessible via messages.#or that my online tone isn't very bubbly and it's weird and uncomfortable to force it.#i stop letting fears about that shape my behavior ('i'll look mean or snotty so let's force markers of Friendliness to avoid that!!') -#- and instead act the way i want to and then trade it in for new fears that come After the action.#also a good reminder to give urself is that if ur fear is abt how other ppl perceive u (as 90% of mine is personally)#u really... can't actually control that. and being very very anxious abt it all the time is usually ur brain throwing a tantrum abt not--#--having that control. bc it is understandably very scary that u don't have that control#as much as it sucks + is terrifying the truth is the only thing u can do is ask urself 'am i behaving in a way that i'm proud of'#'am i behaving in a way that's in alignment w my values + what i think is important'#bc if the answer to that is yes and somebody hates u or is deeply offended by ur existence anyway. well. literally not ur problem#but obv being at peace w that is way way easier said than done + requires tons of practice and will take. probably. years. which is fine#i am stuck with myself. i can either contort myself forever trying to be someone everyone will like and find totally nonthreatening and-#inoffensive and in the process exhaust myself totally and never feel safe or natural myself. OR#i can say okay. so i am a kind of prickly guy with stern and drab speech patterns and close to no social energy. and i think i can still be#-sexy and fun this way. and it is up to other ppl to figure out if they can agree w me on that#ANYWAY enough rambling for now. just another one of those things i think abt a lot so i have a lot of ready-made sentences abt it in mind
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somnimagus · 2 years
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Ohh if MoM would let me this is still The Ideal Team I would assemble based on who's the funniest to watch run
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hm ok so for a while i was thinking that Wally, for the most part, only perceives reality as "Home", the neighborhood. that's his entire world, it's all he knows
but then i slapped myself and went wait. the Live Interview. Wally has been outside of Home, and has interacted with humans (presuming that the interview did actually happen, of course). and through Wally's interactions - or rather, attempt at interactions with Us, the QA, and the WHRP, it can be strongly assumed that he knows that there's an Elsewhere. there are places outside of Home. maybe he doesn't quite understand that there's another reality of sorts, but there's no way he's unaware that there's more than just the neighborhood out there
(and then of course there's the fact that Clown has said that humans are deeply involved (not a direct quote, im paraphrasing) in Welcome Home. maybe Wally interacted with them / regularly interacted with them. there could have been an adjustment period after he gained consciousness where humans helped him learn how to walk/talk/fine motor skills - this could be why he has such a seemingly inherent / desperate trust in Us & the WHRP & the QA... humans made him and cared for him. it's possible he could view them as a sort of higher power to trust & have faith in
& maybe he's been off-set or could go off-set. i mean, the houses' rooms were all different sets - the buildings themselves were empty husks, right? who's to say Wally wouldn't physically walk to the individual set pieces whenever he went over to someone's house (but then that leads me into speculation on how the puppets' consciousness works and how multiple copies of them could co-exist and wondering which is the - im getting off track. but there's all of that and then the two part "you're okay!" art pieces of Wally & Eddie, which are technically canon - dont quote me on that - and that's Another ramble/theory post i could go on about & have strong feelings on. Anyway!)
"but wait," i hear someone protest, "what about Barnaby? he was in the Live Interview too"
but was he? was he really? was that Barnaby, or was that a person in a suit playing the character Barnaby B. Beagle? i mean, if it was Barnaby, there had to be some memory fuckery going on that prevented him from either fully comprehending/realizing the situation, or just made him forget as soon as it was over.
and actually wait, Wally has to be aware of the reality discrepancy. because it was certainly him in the Interview as himself. He had to have understood on some level that either that wasn't really Barnaby, or that Barnaby wouldn't remember the interview.
(there's a connection in my head between all of this & how he would view an apple pie. "it isn't the same anymore. something's different". but i can't pin it down for the life of me.)
and with the Talking Telephone calls, Wally explicitly tells Us that he's not going to tell anyone who was behind the calls. i remember listening to the "original" prank call audio tests, which while were very similar to the canon in-website ones, have a few changes. one of which was Wally - in the tests - saying that the others weren't ready to meet Us yet. now in canon that tidbit has been swapped out for "You have to go too. You have work to do" but i think it's still implied through Wally's purposeful withholding-of-information that he doesn't think the others are ready to know. or he straight up doesn't want them to know
i mean, one little theory i previously had is that Wally wants them all to catch on to the nature of their reality and situation, but he doesn't want to - or Can't - tell them outright. they have to figure it out. and that can't was either something keeping him quiet, or because if they learned too soon / inorganically, their little puppet heads would pop into confetti like Red Guy's in dhmis 4
However my views have Changed and i'm pretty sure Wally is purposefully not telling anyone to maintain the illusion that everything is fine and can continue on as it always has. maybe it comes from a place of protectiveness, of love? whatever the motive i think he wants them all to keep being unaware and dare i say, Complacent while he "fixes" their situation.
which is delusional, but we all know Wally is digging his metaphorical claws into a desperate bid to keep everything the same / return it to its original state, leaving bloody scratches in something already rotted. or something like that!
all this to say i think it's interesting how it seems that he's the only one aware of humans / an outside/other world, yet he's so determined to stay in his lane. he wants connection & communication yet he doesn't want to leave or change. he wants help in keeping things the same (some could say in keeping Our reality & his separated) but in the process he's dooming everyone/everything and tearing down those walls himself
(Wally: i'm going to stay where i am, and you're gonna stay where you are, and we're gonna help each other keep me and my friends where we're meant to be. anyway i wonder what this sledgehammer does)
#this is a very disjointed ramble but when are they ever put together!#i have to start at point a to get to point 36 yk yk#trying to write down my thoughts is like trying to keep a firm grip on a lubed up ferret#SOAPED!!! SOAPED UP!!! I MEANT SOAP yk that doesnt make it any better. anyway moving on dont look at me#its. its. the more i think about wally the more i go insane#like he's got neurosis stacked on neurosis stacked on-#there is something soooo wrong with him <3#homebogging#welcome home speculation#wh speculation#i do think his heart is in the right place. i do think he's trying to achieve something he thinks is good & best for everyone#but... despite being aware of more than his friends... technically knowing more Truth than them#he's more trapped by that knowledge. he's ruled by it. and he doesn't really have the -#i dont want to say capacity bc i have to believe that he Can change. he just doesnt know how / currently doesnt want to / is too scared to#but he doesn't have the freedom the others have. bc in their ignorance they can ignore their confines#in a way they're more real than wally despite living in a fabricated world as fabricated people with fabricated lives#they're authentic in their ignorance#and ive said it before and ill say it again - wally was created as a blank slate while everyone else already had a Foundation#no matter how false their memories are they Have them. they have the tools to change and want change#they already perceive themselves as more than what they were made for. they think they're People (not humans - people) dont they?#so if they learn theyre trapped... they'll want out. meanwhile wally is already stuck bc while they have - in a way - More#the neighborhood & the show are all wally has. he knows there's outside but he doesnt have any reason to Want that outside#bc why would he want to leave home? why would he want anything to change? it's his sole purpose isnt it?#idk i just think wally would benefit from being told 'you dont need a purpose / you dont need to adhere to a purpose / you are enough as Yo#doing what You want. you can just Be'#but yk. what was i talking about again#oh yeah - wally is so so aware and yet so in the dark#he's got one half of the puzzle but they're all corner/edge pieces and he's trying to fill the inside space with Nothing#hm. i wonder if he'll end up needing the other neighbors to help finish the puzzle... who's to say who's to say!!#FUCK YOU TUMBLR I HAD MORE TO SAY. CUT OFF AGAIN AGH
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silkling · 8 months
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Real question folks.
We all know Optimus’s motto right? Right?
“Freedom is the right of all sentient beings.”
Yeah, that one. You know the one.
But. Like. Issue.
Animals are sentient. Animals like dogs, cats, wild animals, they all have sentience. So like, what do we think the Autobots think about that? How do they feel about the fact that humans (and probably every other species in the galaxy) regularly domesticate, tame, and use other sentient creatures for their own gain? For things like. Entertainment, agriculture, pet-keeping. All that stuff.
Do you think they’re bothered by it? Do yo7 think they look at humans, with our pet dogs, and think
“Wow, this situation is kinda fucked up.”
I mean. Personally , I don’t think they take much issue with it. (Especially cause like there’s instances of them in canon not giving a shit. Buster in IDW. Fluffy Ears in Earthspark. Etc.) I think they understand the difference between sentient and sapient. Like. Humans are sapient. Cybertronians are sapient. Animals are….not? At at least not really. If you want to classify animals as sapient I think you can make that argument but even then you have to agree that their sapience is severely limited compared to like. Human sapience.
So. I don’t know. Do you think the bots get wigged out but human pet ownership, I guess. Because I know what Optimus’s motto is. I know what he says. But like. Do you think maybe he means sapient where he says sentient? Cause I think that makes more sense.
Cause like. He’s advocating for total freedom, right? Equality under law, ability to self determine your own life and destiny. But. Uh. That wouldn’t really work for animals? They’re sentient, yah, but they operate on an instinct level. Not an intellect level. Not that they don’t deserve protections and shit. That’s not the point. The point is like. Do you think Optimus (and the other Bots I guess) differentiate between sentience and sapience when they apply their beliefs. Because if not then they’d have to also be advocating for total animal freedom.
I do not know where I am going with this. But. Do you all see my point???? Please tell me you do. This has been niggling at my brain for years and I just. I cannot stop thinking about it. I don’t know why.
Sentience is not sapience. But the Autobots fight for the freedom of “sentient beings”. This is driving me insane. Do you think they care about a difference? Or do they see humans as monsters for our dominion over animals? Someone help I’m thinking too much about something that doesn’t even matter.
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fogwitchoftheevermore · 9 months
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Yes!!! Watchers are Narrative!! I wish I could put it in words better but that's exactly how I see the Watchers. The patterns and stories and everything Just Makes Sense
DUDE LITERALLY i so badly wish i could actually articulate what i'm talking about here or honestly i at least wish i had some screenshots from the bigger mechscord about how people talked about Narrative. but it's just- ok if you're someone who has never heard of the mechanisms.
the mechanisms were a band of immortal space pirates who roamed the universe looking for stories. every story they found was always a tragedy and every story they made was equally a tragedy. they transcended time and space as they traveled because wherever they were going and whatever they were doing was at the whims of whatever (out of universe) made the story better. the way this manifests in universe means that the Narrative kind of exists in universe and has it's own thoughts and whims and is doing it's own thing. this is most obvious when the mechanisms die. but space, i thought you said they were immortal? yeah, they were, until it served the narrative for that to no longer be the case. all of their deaths are pretty indicative of this, but i think jonny's is the best example/the easiest one to understand.
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"for some reason, it sticks". the "reason" is the narrative. the narrative has decided jonny works better dead than alive, now, so that's what he is, even though he has never before been able to reach that point.
basically it's taking those concepts that got real popular on tumblr (doomed by the narrative, the narrative loves you, etc.) and making it real- the narrative is somehow a sentient, alive thing that has wants and a story to tell. you are a member of that story and equally the vessel through which the narrative can tell it. once the narrative no longer needs you, as character or narrator, that means your story is over too.
things happen because the narrative says they do. these things don't have to make sense- sometimes something just works better this way, so there's plot holes and retcons and inconsistencies and missing information from different sides of the story but that doesn't matter because it's all serving one big story.
so like yeah the mechanisms concept of the narrative really encapsulates the watchers, and honestly a lot of mcyt storytelling in general, to me. it's a little cruel but it's mostly just not human. it has a story it wants to tell and that story is very frequently tragic, or at least has a lot of tragedy within it. (the mechanisms sometimes told happy stories! kinda! look the only thing i'm thinking of is briar rose and cinders and even that's not quite happy but you get what i mean.) sometimes the story doesn't quite fit together right, or elements are only decided upon later on and have to be sort of shoved in. the narrative exists mostly outside of the story but sometimes needs to move things along or needs someone to tell the story so it chooses someone to do it. it leaves just enough room for interpretation in the story for the audience to put themselves into it, to have their own brand of fun. do you see the vision.
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daz4i · 11 months
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ik a common pet peeve ppl have with media is that trope of a villain having a really good point about society then immediately killing a baby to achieve it or smth and how it's used by people in power to demonize these criticisms of them. but i do think in bsd when antagonists make a good point it still stands and it's still a good point regardless of what they do about it, and the narrative does not want you to perceive them entirely negatively. like, there's a reason atsushi spends a few chapters in a conflict bc he agrees with fukuchi's ideas, just thinks his methods are harmful. the story lingers on it bc it wants you to stop and think and see the good in them, i think, and not to be mean and turn it around like a "gotcha! you are just as bad for agreeing!" or smth.
i think it all stems from how every character in bsd is morally grey in order to humanize them. every antagonist is presented in a positive light at some point (only exception i can think of is fyodor, who so far hasn't been presented in a really grey way either), their motives or ideals are laid out so you can understand WHY they're doing the things they're doing, and eventually they end up working with the protagonists because well. they're all humans at the end of the day.
the thing driving all protagonists in bsd is simply to keep living (each have their own asterisk next to that, but i won't get into details) and usually keep others safe. they beat the forces that stand in their way of achieving this, but for a moment, these forces' own goals get reflected back onto them, and they become a vehicle for them as well, at times.
it's less of a "villain makes a good point then kills a baby to make you disagree with them", more like "villain makes a good point but the story lingers on it so both you and the in-universe characters think about it and consider it. they also kill a baby but that's more like a personal character flaw that might get ironed out of them with the power of friendship"
that's also why wildly loved characters that are generally considered positive start out trying to kill the protags (akutagawa, chuuya, lucy, poe, sigma, the hunting dogs etc). you know WHY they do this. you know what led them here. you also saw other sides to them - silly moments, helping their comrades or innocent bystanders, positive interactions with the main cast - which help make them feel more human, thus making them easier to understand for us as readers.
idk man i think it's p cool
EDIT: i will also add!!!! that imo fyodor seeming purely evil despite bsd's attempt at humanizing its characters!!!! is less of a fault in writing but rather showing how he dehumanizes HIMSELF. he views himself as more than human. characters like sigma view him as more than human. and so, for now, the narrative will treat him as such too - not bc he's right. but bc it serves his current story, and hopefully a future arc will have him unlearning that, or more layers will be peeled from him so at least we as an audience can see his humanity (i have a feeling the information sigma got from him + the injury dazai gave him + him being bested in general + whatever the fuck "that man" comment was, will all play a part in that)
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omarwolaeth · 5 months
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Sometimes I think about how the natural energies might not have been as clean cutting as we're lead to believe, and how Yuuya and Yuzu might not be the only split-soul existences, entirely because of a blast radius that neither Ray nor Leo knew about if the En cards ever went off.
#marwospeaking#Imagine hiding under an overhang of rubble. finally safe from Z-Arc perceiving you as being there and a target for his wrath#and some other pro duellist with confidence bigger than the solar system activates four man-made eldritch abominations in the shape of card#to end the eldritch abomination that is 1 part human to 4 parts dragon. and it also ends you because you just happened to be within range#would you have the Ray issue of only being a spirit? or the Zarc problem of your pieces are at each other's throats because their monsters#said so? do you have either problem or neither - and if neither. do you still exist in those pieces or are they unable to recall anything..#..of you? would they ever be able to figure out why their faces are identical if they ever met?#or even if you were a result of this. how do you live knowing you weren't meant to exist all because your original form got caught in..#.. something that never should've involved in - the price was Ray and Zarc. and never them. but they ended up as part of the payment anyway#can you even claim anything of that? Leo Akaba would probably deny you that because it would free him of the responsibility that#his cards killed someone wholly innocent because they were too close to the cards. because then it frees him of a guilt he can't#cure by bringing 6 existences back that only ever existed in this new world. how would you feel if you were part of academia only..#.. to realise your death and creation can be squarely blamed on Leo Akaba for creating the murder weapon in its four pieces..#..and it was never meant to be used on you but it was anyway. without anyone realising it until it's far too late. 14 years too late#14 years and another instance of reality too late#whoops! ended up rambling. anyway this is Taking Up Space In My Brain#arc v
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welcometogrouchland · 9 months
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I support the "Batman was unfairly biased to Stephanie for XYZ reasons" crowd so strongly bc DC claims that Bruce is a master planner who is able to understand anyone's psychology but he didn't realize that literally every single one of Steph's problems as a teenager would've been solved by her joining a shitty punk band. If he couldn't figure that much out then he didn't understand her for a minute
#ramblings of a lunatic#PLEASE TALK TO ME I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ON STEPHANIE IN A SHITTY PUNK BAND#her bandmates have turned into ocs it's stage 5 at this point boys#anyway what is steph dealing w/ pre-52 as spoiler that got her in hot water?#1. the anger issues. easily fixed by her getting to scream about beating her dad to death without actually doing it#2. nobody fucking listens to her (including batman). well when u are playing music ppl are definitely fucking listening#3. has no non-batfam friends and thus ends up feeling abandoned almost every time she gets kicked out of the group. bandmates are friends!#don't like being in your shitty house? go to your band mates house and jam!#need to articulate the anger issues in a way that doesn't disturb your frazzled paranoid boyfriend? write angsty songs!#also I do genuinely have a lot of thoughts on how music was applied to Stephanie's character and what it tells us about her#like she loved it. clearly. and she was GOOD at it too. steph is constantly perceived as a screw up and has pretty low opinion of herself#piano was something she could take pride in. in i believe issue 113 of tims og robin series-#-tim is AMAZED at her playing all these years later. so is nocturna a few issues earlier#there's a standard visual language in comics for good or bad music- notation drawn in either shaky or smooth lines#stephs are all smooth and golden. she's good even after all these years of not practicing#but all she says to tim after he compliments her is ''i used to be better...'' SHE SEES THE WORST IN HERSELF AND HER ABILITIES#SHE DESERVES A CHANCE TO FEEL GOOD AT AT LEAST ONE THING LIKE SHE FINALLY GOT TO AS BATGIRL IN HER SOLO#and onto my final point: dinah has several times expressed some degree of fondness/admiration for steph. steph has likewise trained w dinah#and thinks she's cool as fuck. which makes sense. bc dinah is cool as fuck#and what is dinah in??? that's right. a band#steph should join dinahs band for her mental health. this has been an essay#stephanie brown#spoiler dc#dc batgirl#batgirls#<- since that series re-canonized pianist steph!! bless them!
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I think people using he/him for fake bean might mean it in the way they'd refer to a dog of unknown gender (i.e. "Look at him go!")
But using they/them myself I understand how annoying this can be lmao.
(That is a fair point! I am guilty of this too, so I definitely see where you are coming from!
It can a little frustrating, but it's not like the end of the world to me, and I'm kinda used to it bc pretty much all my sonas/characters are usually perceived as masculine unless they are very outwardly presenting in a feminine way (and even then it's 50/50 hdshdf)
But 99% of the time it is not malicious intent, so there's no need to worry about it too much
Tho that all being said, as a general reminder, please respect people's pronouns if you know them!)
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virtuangel · 2 years
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김준서 (KIM JUN SEO) 1st Mini Album [ECHOES of love] 2022.11.20 6PM (KST)
#kim junseo#wei#ouiai#DEAR GOD it's 10AM as i draft we have 6 hours to go until i post but oh my god im finally done i thought id never finish dear GOD#this is far from the best thing ive ever done. but it was an interesting experience#nd definitely took some time (not the most tho . nothing can beat paula's birthday set when it comes to that) but also .... surprisingly#less than i thought ? like longer but also shorter .? u know ?#this made me go insane i kept forgetting about my food and i also kept working in silence half of the time bc i would forget to put smth on#eri if i decide to do a second one next year PLEASE tell me to start sooner like if i start brainstorming into ur ear in like may pls accept#i say 'if' as if i wasnt already working on song choices for next year lmao#i was really excited for this and i think that made me not rlly think as much as i should have i think i can do better next year . if i star#if i start early enough#ANYWAYS#happy junseo birth <3 my prince <3 or smth idk#pls dont perceive the mcd thumbnail from up close i beg u#boy who's so important . . a boy so fox . . . nation's model (2) pretty boy with pretty voice . . whatever im not gonna start rambling more#but he's very important n i hope he knows that he is & that he's so very loved & i hope that he's happy today and always . etc#nd i love him or whatever . whatever whatever no one look everyone close your eyes#*mine#special thanks to eri as always my bewoved who has been hearing me talk about this for the past like month thank u for putting up with me#(re:this and also in general i love u)
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rambunctioustoons · 11 months
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I feel like because I fell down the dca rabbit hole while being deliriously horribly sick with the flu, it's literally required of me to make a sick fic chapter.
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Thoughts on fannart of your ocs?
mmmm yeah! i think Yes
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Okay but you have to understand how READY I am to get a live action ORV film series. Quick disclaimer that I honestly know really little about film/visual media (and even less about East Asian media), but...
On a story level, it simply sounds like a Bad Idea. I mean, how do you translate a story about stories told through the medium of words into live action? How do you translate the way it makes sure to tell you that this story works as reality because you can't see it, because there concepts that you can really only visualise in your head through the written word?
But then again, they could go the direction of using the medium of film itself as Dokja's fourth wall. Make it seem like a cool but generic live action with subtle hints here and there that it's more than it seems. Have Dokja be hot rather than his plain and average...have fight scenes and choose which thoughts or not we get to hear. I mean, seriously...the film doesn't have to be cohesive or accurate to the book. It could literally just be the way Dokja wants you to experience his story and his narration - the film could be a depiction of his unreliable narrative. And as he and the walls begin to crack, so does the story...and maybe we'll get to see those thoughts and cracks in the beginning of the story through flashbacks rather than real time (could make the inner speech filters sound nicer but idk).
Or if it's truly just Bad(tm), it's still fun because yeah...guess who took on the role of the Star Stream and forced a story and its characters into a tale to pander to audiences simply for capital gain? (Or what if they really do make big changes to the ORV story so as to accommodate the medium of film as story? Make it so that the film itself is the Star Stream?)
And also, a last slightly less ironic and overenthusiastic observation....just that, yeah, I do wish ORV was animated instead of live action. But given that their animation industry is somewhat small, currently, and that means they might have to rely on Japanese studios, I prefer they just stick to live action. There's no telling how Japanese studios will localise Korean names/settings/history, as they've done with Solo Levelling and Raelina. Again, I have NO idea if this is a right assumption to make, so if someone knows more about it, I'm happy to be corrected.
The point is, though, that ORV live action has the potential to be spectacularly bad or good - either or. I don't think it's possible for it to be just mediocre or average and I wouldn't want it to. It's either KimCom definitely made this movie post-Dokja return to make money off their leader's stupidity or the studios will capture the essence of how stories and humans are fatefully intertwined but through the medium of film.
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returnofahsoka · 2 years
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the difference between these two images haunts me in ways i simply cannot put into words
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look. at. this. look how tiny and insignificant and vulnerable that light is against the darkness and then look how they almost burn everything out in that other scene, blinding and white-hot and powerful, and tell me you don't want to chew on your phone screen
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