#anyway back to the normal tags ig
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"it's just me."
you barely get a chance to roll onto your back before soonyoung's already climbing onto the bed and somewhat on top of you and your blankets, and it's only seconds later that he crashes. it's far from the first time this has happened (soonyoung is clingy and cuddly, especially when he's sleepy), but he manages to knock the wind out of you nonetheless. he rests his head on your chest, and you wiggle an arm out to curl around him as best as you can in your semi-trapped position.
"soonyoung--"
"just go back to sleep," he murmurs. "everything's fine."
you stroke his hair, thumb dipping down to graze his cheek at one point. "soonie--"
"i mean it," he says, eyes peering up in the low light to see yours. "i'm fine. just need to nap." his hand finds yours, and he wraps your arm around him as he snuggles in. he plants a kiss against your chest before resting his head against it again, eyes fluttering shut. "you can rest a little longer, too."
you settle back down after a moment, arms wrapped around soonyoung as you shut your eyes again. sometimes you swear this tiger is a teddy bear, but regardless of which he is, he's yours.
#nonranghaes.thoughts#seventeen drabbles#seventeen fluff#seventeen x reader#hoshi x reader#hoshi fluff#kwon soonyoung x reader#kwon soonyoung fluff#nonranghaes.svt#hi sorry i just. needed to write something short n soft#tw for medical stuff in the tags but i need to call hospice abt a catheter bc shes... getting weaker ultimately#which. i dont know if i should be Worried or if this is normal for someone in her condition yknow?#we've started tracking how much she eats bc shes never rly ate much like. Ever. and its hard to know when shes fully pulling back from food#most of the time though its just... quiet. she just sleeps a lot. i dont know what to make of it...#anyway sorry for the small vent here im just... getting through it all ig#i need a soonyoung to cuddle with and to help me feel like i can make it through this
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thinking so so hard about LaughingStock and how that'd go down. disastrously, probably
#and ill talk about it at Length in the tags until tumblr cuts me off like a rowdy drunk after last call#please keep in mind this is all in my Brain and relationship dynamics etc are all technically speculation. anyway#so while franklydear is your more classic 'oh no im in love with him! / aw shucks im in love with him<3'#laughingstock is 'feelings what feelings / oh shit oh fuck this is bad'#to Me.#in my mind howdy is completely oblivious to his emotions#he's out here like 'gotta get the store impressively neat & shiny for barnaby! and everyone else' without blinking an eye#he starts assembling barnaby and wally's dogs slower an slower so that barnaby has to hang around a smidge longer than usual#he's out here giggling at barnaby's jokes while sweeping Hours or Days after the joke was told like a lovesick idiot#all while being like Ah Yes Barnaby My Dear Friend. My Platonic Buddy Whose Jokes I Laugh At A Little Too Hard. Platonically.#meanwhile barnaby Realizes his own feels. has a minor crisis. goes through the 12 stages of grief and absolutely panics#he's like 'ok just gotta play it cool. normal. dont be weird. he'll fall for your natural charm in no time'#'ill hold all of my feelings right here until i die or howdy reciprocates. i just cant tell anyone about this.'#'....hey wally you can keep a secret right'#and rizzes it up yk. rolls a nat 20 on charisma every time without howdy even realizing it. ig barns rolled for stealth too#and from barnabys pov its going great!#howdy is flirting back! hes showing all the signs! when eddie views their interactions he comes to barnaby later and is like A+ gay as fuck#so barnaby is a soft pining mess and howdy is Absurdly Oblivious despite being a clever & observant guy#so im imagining (will freely admit that this Train of Thought is slightly inspired by the latest chapter of Stamps by Indigopoptart)#that eventually barnaby is Confident in their budding relationship ok. hes ready to ask howdy out.#everyone who Knows (wally & eddie) are like Go For It He Clearly Loves You#and when barnaby tells howdy. howdys like 'ohhhh geez um im really flattered 🥺 but i dont feel the same 😔😭'#cue barnaby turning into the 'never again' meme while trying to laugh it off and pretend like he didnt just have his heart mr starked#so he goes home to smoke his pipe and cry and howdy goes about his day feeling Strange#why cant he stop thinking about that confession. what are these emotions. i mean its not as if hes in love with Ohhhhhh No. Oh No.#so howdy has his 'holy shit! im in love with barnaby! (lovestruck. swooning) ....Holy Shit I Rejected Barnaby (horrified. nauseous)' moment#cue howdy expecting barnaby to come by in the morning as per Routine so they can talk. he Doesnt. cue howdy stressing the fuck out over it#meanwhile wally sally (eddie sent her in his place. hes too busy) and barnaby are having a girls day (eating ice cream and watchin romcoms)#eventually barnaby hears that howdy has been Dropping The Ball and cant not check on him. cue emotional heart-2-heart outside the bodega#this is all very specific but its in my brain. these scenarious lull me to sleep every night lately
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The diffriders are so fucking fascinating to me specifically flare trooper dumjid bc like. You take a dragon mercenary who has seen war and has actively watched many comrades die. His whole thing is that he’s a perfect guard and thus the only one who survived, leading to a fucked up conception of himself as above death. And then you have him possess the body of some kid who presumably agrees to let him see earth bc That’s His Favorite Card And He Thinks He’s Cool and who’s probably like 12 (sorry saori I have no clue how old you are I’m just guessing based off taiyou + hiroki) and just. Walk around on earth (where are saori’s parents btw. Like you could say this about most vanguard characters but where are saori’s parents/guardians/friends do they know what “saori” is up to?? Does anyone who knew him pre-diffride realize how different he’s been acting?). Play a card game where he commands his dead comrades bc shiranui is paying him (which. How is he paying him, earth currency or cray currency? And what IS cray currency for that matter?). The only thing he likes about earth is the music but he is specifically cursed to keep having his headphones break. When a unit who’s diffriding a human dies in the human’s body, both the unit and the human die on both planets, and besides the money dumjid is only on shiranui’s team bc antero/miguel DIED, a fact which he’s fully aware of and iirc derides him for (may be wrong abt that one though). He constantly tells people to die when he’s cardfighting them. He is laid-back about vanguard and doesn’t care much until he loses a cardfight and because loss and death are inextricably linked in his mind he proceeds to get Super Fucked Up About It bc he’s built his entire self image off being The One Who Survives and losing the cardfight is akin to confirming that it’s possible for him to die & he especially can’t accept that Some Random Humans have the ability to take him out. Sometimes he shows his opponents the battlefield and the bodies of his comrades and they really don’t seem to devote much thought to it (like. What??? I get that chrono & friends love vanguard and chrono does address it a little bit but mostly iirc just to say “I don’t think that’s what vanguard actually does/that’s not OUR vanguard”). He’s affected worse and worse with each loss and joins a group trying to end the world to get revenge on the humans who’ve beaten him (iirc unclear whether he knows the success of the destruction of the earth will destroy him too). He becomes the last of the original diffriders - chaos breaker dragon doesn’t count he was diffridden during U20 - to remain on earth, a point which he makes sure to bring up as proof of his superior survival abilities. The kid whose body he’s possessing expresses that he’s not happy about the way dumjid’s acting and dumjid doesn’t give a shit and continues to puppet his body around. Just, everything about him as a character is so fascinating in a concerning way and, like shiranui, he brings up the fact that vanguard is Real in a way that the earth characters don’t really consider - yes they have strong imaginations and genuine attachment to their units, but ultimately they’re playing a card game where even if cards get sent to the drop/damage zones they can come back for the next battle* whereas on cray they’re fighting Actual Battles and the units that die die For Real And Permanently. Unlike shiranui, who eventually began to see vanguard as a method of reunion with his dead friends and decided that what he’d been told about earth vanguard being a direct cause for his friends’ deaths might be wrong, Dumjid never changes his view on earth vanguard after “experiencing death”, so when he finally loses and goes back to cray he’s essentially dragged back clawing and screaming. I don’t know, there’s just something about him that’s sooooo soooo fascinating to me
#*not counting g zones in battles with zeroth dragons except that chrono’s g zone DID come back#though that was probably only possible due to his Singularity so that’s a special case ig#also saori is kinda fascinating too in that he’s just some normal kid who agrees to let dumjid puppeteer his body bc he looks up to him#and then dumjid brings all his baggage and Completwlg Fucking Spirals and saori’s like I Want To Get Off This Ride Now but he Can’t#and while he once let dumjid control him now dumjids controlling him by force#and saori Doesn’t Like What He’s Doing but he Can’t Control His Own Body and he’s moving and speaking but it Isn’t Him#and even after dumjid is sent back from cray he falls in a coma#and I’m pretty sure he was in the coma for the longest time out of the people that were diffriden#which makes sense considering how much longer dumjid was controlling him for#but imagine waking up and you’re finally you again#but you have to deal with the fact that someone who you thought was cool used your body to try to start the apocalypse#and it affected your physical health too + you probably remember feeling all the things that dumjid felt#like. what. and I think we only saw him non-diffridden that one time in the last episode on his team with taiyou and hiroki#which was very cute and all and I’m glad he at least got friends out of it but Good God#anyways all the diffriders are just Fascinating to me and I could probably talk like this abt all of them#but I probably think about dumjid the most bc of *gestures* All That#sorry I have Gotta Yap Disease but I think I’m done now probably.#cfvg#fuchidaka saori#kind of#flare trooper dumjid#guess we’re tagging units now
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self-reflection.
#zexal#yugioh zexal#ygo zexal#astral (zexal)#my art#key_anem#pixel art#dot pict#whewww#back from the dead#hi guys! long time no see#for all ye tag readers: my sudden disappearance was for various reasons#but the main one was just fandom burnout. i love the zexal community! but my old habits caught up to me again#hence the break#i am not normally very active on tumblr here anyways. i am more active on other sites like ig (with the same name)#and discord. i am there too >:]#i’m very sorry for worrying any of my tumblr mutuals. i had to take the sudden break for the sake of my own mental health#i am doing better though! please take care#happy zexal month everyone!!#in other related news: the dotting on the bottom took FOREVER (two hours)#my eyes hurt
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the power i will receive in a matter of days will be astounding. watch out
#i am making this post to ramble. idk if it will actually change anything but i am trying 2 be hopeful .#ive been very. Rough all month thus far both physically and mentally and occasionally both at the same time#i am just hoping tht wat i am getting soon will help me do things bc ive rly had no energy to do anything at alllllll#and i rly dont want to like. Explode i would like to get things done#i have things i owe to people!!! i just dont have the spoons to do it Ever and it piles iup and up in my head#it fucking blows dude i have been stuck in a horrendous loop for like almost 6 months#i just want 2 be normal u know . i am hoping something will change soon#if it does not change in the nesxt few days when my shit arrives i think im like. Done For in general#like if im unable to get anything done in the next few days then i am going to very seriously have to reconsider#literally everything i do online i think. its a bit fucked up#ik it sounds like an exaggeration bu there is noooo way in hell i am Surviving like tihs !!!!!!! slash srs#i wish twitter circles did not die so i cold blow up in there bu back to ye olde norm of tumblr tags will have to do#also it feels less invasive so like. win for me ig. i do miss rambling nonstop in tags#i miss tumblr!! i miss a lot of old stuff. reminiscing for reasons both good and bad. the tumblr stuff is the good side tho#anyways i have been slowly chipping away at writing thigns this month and ik its like. not a lot at all.#but its a lot to *me* and when youre someone whos only capable of doing so mch its like. a big deal#(im writing pmdnd stuff finally getting back into gear nd stuff i have been trying to slowly draw the npcs#that ive made whilst trying to recover in other areas bu rghghrghgrgr i dont ewant to draw#i havent wanted to draw in a long long time blows up)#i shuld. stop typing actually i am rambling too much i jsujt have nowhere to mindlessly ramble anymore technicaly#i dont want to bug my friends w me being unwell all the time DFJKGHDFKGFG#mayne i will try to ccontinue with the npcs. we will see based on if i post again in the next 30 minutes
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sometimes I’m scared that other people only think my outfits eat when they emphasize my waistline and make me look skinny and not when it’s an outfit that I put a lot of care into because it’s another form of expression for me
#silv's back on her bs#like I know I probably sound like ‘boohoo it must be so hard for other people to think you’re skinny’ but I just mean that like.#I’m really proud of the outfits I put together#I like my style and I like how I’ve spent the last couple years exploring with it and letting it be another extension of myself#and I’ve created a (very small) rep around having cool outfits#but the other day someone complimented my outfit and don’t get me wrong I felt nice that day#but it was literally just low rise sweatpants and a cropped tee (ie heavens forbid I had skin showing and my stomach was out)#like was it cute? sure but it definitely wasn’t an Outfit#and I got a lot more compliments because on it then I do on a normal basis#and idk. I wasn’t the biggest fan of that#and I’m scared that I’m also starting to use it as a crutch when I’m putting clothes on before I leave#like the other day I was putting an outfit together and instead of reaching for something that I think is really cool and being creative#I was genuinely met with a wave of like ‘okay but how attractive am I gonna be if I wear this’ or ‘would other ppl think I look good’#which is FUCKED#because I LOVE clothes!!!! I LOVE dressing up!!!! and I KNOW that I don’t need to look good for others that beauty and style doesn’t#have to be conventional that there’s so many cool things that lie outside that framework. And I used to be outside of that framework too#but UGH I hate that everyone else’s opinions on MY body are starting to get to me#anyways i feel like this should have a cw but idk what to add#ask to tag#ig(?)
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hey guys sorry for being dead i'm gonna try and bring back this blog
also i'm agender now thats cool
#bee tag#new art tag!! wowie!!!#agender#nonbinary#pride#lgbtqia#objectsona#osc#anyways normal tags now#lolly got a redesign!!! she/it prns for her now#i'm a lot more active on toyhouse rn so follow me there if you want#i also have some art trades and adopts open there#ALSO i'm doing customs for warrior cats and murder drones on my toyhouse!!! go there if you want one ig idfk#ive been hyperfixated on murder drones and warrior cats so you'll probably see a lot of my ocs from those series#im so sorry osc followers i promise i'll go back to drawing funny object guys again soon#also sorry to all the wof followers jesus christ theres so many
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not being able to fit in even with the groups of ppl who don’t fit in lol sometimes it feels like this high school mentality will never end.
#ranting in the tags#not that it matters but i’m sensitive so i’m gonna complain no matter what#being called a loner all your life then turning it into some kind of badge of honor#bc it’s the only way not being able to click with or connect with ppl stings less#it only works for so long. and when it stops working… lol. just kinda sucks ig.#like every negative trait i was told i have is just reinforced bc duh!!! ding ding ding it’s all making sense ofc ppl don’t wanna talk to u!#i don’t talk enough or make a good effort or i talk too much and make no sense or come off as rude#and either way i’m off putting and it just takes too much effort to be around me#it’s like i make peace with these things and then one fucking thing happens and i’m being slammed back to 15 year old bella mentality again#it’s so exhausting and i’m so tired of being upset that i’m not good at like being a normal functioning fucking person#and ppl try and connect with me but i just give absolutely nothing in return bc i don’t know how to!!!#genuinely like how do ppl just talk to each other? how do you all have friends and make it look so easy and natural#like it’s obviously probably easy and natural bc it’s supposed to be and for some reason i just like… can’t?#okay. whatever#doesn’t matter anyway i’ll go on living#just hate being sad over this. it feels so lame lol.#oscillating between self obsession and self pity every two weeks or so i’m actually so fucking over it hahaha#but it’s cool. i’m cool. rant over 😚#bella complains
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i hate change id rather die
#people arent sticking to their usual selves stop messing w my mind#havent talked to some friends in a while and theyre wildly dif and its making me so irritated can we go back to how we were before#my obsession of waiting by the phone until someone messages me first is coming back in the worst way possible#the coincidences with k stopped and i barely even see him anymore and his clothing style is changing???#hes becoming more normal popular whatever and its so boring please i need a loser boy go back to being that#mb i cant sleep and feelings are coming back but in a weirder way and i have like 2 projects due tmr im not done w and test#i need more friends but in the way of being irl that i can wave at during school and send them videos without talking fr#serenity wake up and come home bro literally ditch school just for me 🙏 believe in u bbg#omg sid is coming back tmr thank god i need my daily walks w him i literally tried w another guy today and it was not the same#bro was yapping ab love whatever idek 😭 told me ab his crushes which good for him ig but i barely know him idc 🙏#insta wants me to stop liking k too cause it deleted all my past stories ab him when i tried to make a highlight#is it so hard to have everyone obsessed with me all the time. cant people just pay attention to me forever#i forgot what i said in this post whatever im deleting it later anyway#post#erics tag#delete later#cringingg that people know stuff ab me and why i am the way i am. maybe they should all die so it becomes a secret again#literally why did i ever talk anything out with anyone other than serenity thats so fucking stupid no shit shes the only good one#thats a lie i love attention i just hate asking for it i cant even be bothered to say more bro im so exhausted but not in a sleeping way yk#kindividual posting
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Skz reacting to you kissing them in front of the other members
Warnings: um some kissing ig? Nothing else really
Tags: established relationships, kissing, so much fluff, seungmin being a little menace like always, I think that’s it
A/n: have this while you wait for my long hyunjin one shot! Also I just started writing skz and don’t fully know how to write their personalities yet so pls be kind🙏
────୨ৎ────
Chan:
I kinda feel like this would be a normal thing for y’all?
Like you would frequently come by the studio while skz is recording to visit him
And you’d always end up giving him a little hello and goodbye kiss
It was always just a peck but you’d think you two were full on groping each other by the way the members start gagging and groaning
They honestly should be used to it by now but they just can’t help but tease their dad leader
Mainly seungmin
“Ew you like kissing old men?”
But Chan’s used to it by now and just rolls his eyes and focuses back on his work
But he can’t hide the smile on his face
He kinda likes when the members tease him, it really makes them feel like family
Minho:
Would definitely turn it into a spectacle
Ik he doesn’t normally like skin ship from the other member that much so many people think he wouldn’t like pda from the reader but I think it’d be quite the opposite
Like I feel like he’d be the type that would grab you and pull you in closer when you try to just give him a peck in the dorm
Like we’re talking turning it into a full on make out session
And he’s fully aware the members are there, that’s partly why he does it
He thinks it’s kinda funny to get a reaction out of them
I feel like there’d be a mix array of both groaning an wolf whistling from the others
Either way he’d just throw a middle finger to the members over his shoulder as he smirks into the kiss
Changbin:
I actually kinda feel like changbin would be a little embarrassed
Like at first he’d kinda forget the other members are there and kinda get into it
And then when he’d hear the reaction from the members he’d pull away with a little blush on his cheeks
Would have that cute little embarrassed smile that he does as he lowers his head a little as he murmurs a “shut up” to the members
(If you’re a stay I feel like you definitely know which smile I’m talking about)
Would totally never admit to anybody that he was blushing
Like the other members maybe Chan would tease him like “aw binnies embarrassed”
And changbin being his loud self would be like “HUH? YOU THINK ID GET EMBARRASSED OVER SOMETHING LIKE THIS?”
Like my mind immediately went to that men in colorful pants vlive he did with Chan and Han when he was yelling at chan for calling him out on rapping his line too fast and he was like “YOU THINK I RAPPED FAST CAUSE I WAS NERVOUS?” Lol
Just imagine him saying it like that if you’ve seen that live
Jisung:
This man would be SHOOK
Like I’m talking about pulling away like he’s been BURNED
Quokka cheeks are flaming red
Why do I almost feel like this man would let out a surprised yelp as if you’ve just attacked him lmao
Looks between you and the members with wide eyes like “did that really just happen?”
unlike with the others I feel like the members wouldn’t make teasing comments towards you guys
They’d just be on the floor ROLLING at Han for getting so flustered
And even though you were the cause of it he’d still hide his face behind you to escape his embarrassment
Hyunjin:
Feel like he wouldn’t get too into the kiss knowing the others are there
But also would definitely lean into you a bit
For some reason I just feel like hyunjin would be an amazing kisser
I mean have you seen those luscious lips??
Anyways that’s a story for another fic lol I’m getting distracted
like Chan I’d feel like he’d get his sassy eye roll going on when the members made a comment
With how much it seems that hyunjin and seungmin play around with each other seungmin would definitely tease the shit out of him
And hyunjin would give him that signature bombastic side eye
I feel like seungmin would keep it going to the point of hyunjin just eventually standing up to literally pounce on him
Seungmin would just be laughing like a maniac the whole time
Felix:
I actually feel like Felix wouldn’t be as embarrassed as you’d think
Like Ik he’s a smol bean but down deep I feel like Felix is actually pretty confident
Not in a cocky way but like he’s sure of himself yk?
Like I feel like he’d just smile into it
Turns it into a bit of a longer but still soft and sweet kiss
Just completely ignoring the noises from the members in the background
Like I think he’d just be in his own little world with you
After y’all pull away he just pulls you to sit facing forward on his lap and hugs you from behind
Has THE brightest smile on his face as he does it
Seungmin:
I kinda feel like seungmin wouldn’t like you giving him pda
Not like to the point of getting angry or anything
But I kinda feel like he’d pull an “ew” face lol
(And I don’t mean this as being bad or anything, I myself don’t really love pda so I get it lol)
But you probably do it to just playfully annoy him
Which is why you’d probably be giggling with the members at him
“I hate you guys” but he’d say it with a smile on his face so you knew he wasn’t actually upset about it
He’d probably give you a long kiss later in his room to make up for it
Jeongin:
He wouldn’t go as far as to immediately yank away like jisung
But he’d definitely be a shy baby
Ik he looks all grown up and stuff these days but I feel like little baby bread is still under there somewhere lol
Like his eyes would widen mid kiss when he really processes that you’re kissing him in front of everyone
The members wouldn’t so much as tease him like with the others as they would moan and groan about seeing their little maknae doing “adult stuff” lol
Poor thing would definitely turn red, covering his face with his hands as he sunk down
Would honestly be wishing the couch would just swallow him up
Probably wouldn’t make eye contact with you for the rest of the night because he’d just start immediately blushing lol
Also would probably keep his distance cause anytime your hands so much as touched the members would tease him about y’all making sure you weren’t “moving too fast”
End notes: well I officially finished this at 5am lmao. Guess I better head to bed🫡
#skz x reader#skz#skz imagines#stray kids#stray kids x reader#bang chan x reader#lee know x reader#changbin x reader#han jisung x reader#hyunjin x reader#felix x reader#seungmin x reader#jeongin x reader#reader insert#lee felix#bang chan#lee know#han jisung#hyunjin#seungmin#jeongin#headcanon#fluff#fluffy
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for @steddie-week day 3 | long (and a little bit of mutual pining but the kind when they're literally dating which i think is even more pathetic)
tags: modern day, famous au, actor!steve, rockstar!eddie
Eddie stayed longer than he should have.
He was supposed to leave Chicago with the rest of the band yesterday after their show at Credit Union 1 – opening night for a year-long national tour.
Eddie didn’t leave yesterday though. Instead, he insisted on spending one last night with Steve, one last morning pretending like they would actually get up and go to that breakfast spot they like even though they both knew they’d be spending the time wrapped up together in their bed, in the home they share, refusing to disentangle themselves until they had no other choice.
No other choice meant Eddie waited so long to leave that he ended up on a flight which would get him into Ohio with barely enough time to make it to the venue in Cincinnati before showtime (and he was missing soundcheck completely – sorta shot himself in the foot with that one, in Steve's opinion, though he won’t be caught complaining).
He won’t be caught doing anything – not publicly, anyway.
Steve and Eddie’s relationship is kind of in the halfway-stage between secret and private, where Steve posts vague, faceless photos of the two of them every now and then but still deflects questions about his romantic life during interviews because – look. He and Eddie are both at weird high-points in their careers at the moment, and that means there’s a lot of eyes on them whether they like it or not. Steve had a public relationship turn sour years ago and there is no way in hell he’s letting it happen again.
Not with Eddie. Not when it counts.
There are speculations, obviously (and after Steve dropped Eddie off at O'Hare, he posted a photo of the Kiss n’ Fly sign to his IG story with the caption i hate this place :( – mostly for his own amusement at the specific way his notifications implode afterward), and they’ll probably get around to an official hard-launch someday, but for now Steve likes that they’re keeping things to themselves, especially when they don’t get to make that choice with much else.
Steve gets a just landed text from Eddie a few hours after he boarded his plane.
(Steve knew. He’d been tracking the flight).
Before he could respond, Eddie added, miss you so fn much
i miss you too, Steve texted back, and before either of them could wallow in it too much, he sent, gonna make it on time?
probably, Eddie answered. Then, getting ready in the car lol
He goes quiet after that (the getting ready, presumably), which is fine.
Steve gets it.
He’s busy too. It’s why he’s not following along on Eddie’s tour like some glorified groupie, and it’s not like the distance is anything new. On the contrary, it’s been an element of their relationship since they met at an awards show after-party four years ago. It’s more that this time around, they were supposed to only have four-and-a-half weeks together before Steve headed off on a press tour for the movie he filmed last year, but then that got pushed out a bit further, and so that four-and-a-half weeks together turned into a glorious nine, the longest Steve and Eddie’s calendars had ever been aligned without some serious planning beforehand.
He just got used to it, Steve supposes.
He got used to having Eddie around all the time, under his fingertips, under his skin. He got used to saying goodnight in person, in their bed together instead of over phone lines, got used to waking up in Eddie's arms and hearing sweet nothings whispered in his ear rather than reading the texts Eddie would leave for him to wake up to when they were apart.
He'll adjust just like he always does, and the worst part will be over tomorrow morning – that moment right between sleep and wake when Steve will realize Eddie isn’t in their bed with him.
Like it or not, the distance is their normal and they make it work (except it’s not even making it work, because it’s not like that. Any situation, any set of circumstances will work without question because it’s Eddie).
The start time for the Cincinnati show comes and goes. A few minutes into the opening act and while Steve is mindlessly flitting between Instagram and TikTok waiting for the algorithm to fill his feed with clips from the concert (ones of Eddie, preferably), his screen lights up with a call.
“Hey,” he says the second he slams his thumb on the green accept button.
“Hey,” Eddie replied, his tone nothing short of grim.
“You geared up for the show?” Steve asked.
“No,” Eddie answered, “I’m quitting.”
Steve rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, okay.”
“I need you to come tuck my pockets in,” Eddie said, and it’s a goddamn wonder Steve didn’t break down then and there, because Eddie always managed to tug his pants on in a way that made the front pockets stick out just a bit, and throughout their years together Steve had gotten into the habit of tucking them back in for him, squeezing Eddie’s hips a little when he was done and pulling him in for a kiss.
“Yeah,” Steve manages a wet laugh, “I – fuck, man, I wish I was there to tuck them in for you.”
“I want you here so bad, Steve," Eddie says, "I really, really miss you."
“I miss you too,” Steve nodded, even though miss isn't a big enough word for the homesick feeling in his chest, “Only a week until the Indy show though. And I’m coming with you for the Michigan one after.”
“Yeah,” Eddie replied, and if he sounded a little morose about it, Steve was right there with him. Sure, it’s a comfort knowing he’ll be seeing Eddie again so soon, but when those two days are over…yeah, it’s gonna be a long goddamn while until next time, because Eddie will be playing the Midwest while Steve’s press tour is mostly on the East Coast this time around, and after that he heads up into Vancouver to shoot a period drama mini-series while Eddie plays the southern half of the US, and then��well, Steve could keep going. They’re both taking a short break for the holidays, but that and the rare weekend one of them can fly out to the other is about it for the foreseeable future.
Which, yeah, Steve loves acting, loves that he gets to make a whole career out of it, and he knows that Eddie feels the same way about his music, but…the love he has for Eddie definitely edges out the rest of it – enough that he feels the distance between him like a dull, ever-present ache whenever they’re apart.
Eddie only ends their call when his manager practically has to yank the phone out of his hand and shove him onstage, and then Steve settles back into bed, back into scrolling mindlessly on his phone waiting for his finely-tuned algorithms to do their jobs.
Sure enough, it takes less than thirty minutes for Steve’s FYP to start showing him TikToks from Eddie’s show, and amidst all the hair and leather and silver chains and chunky rings and eyeliner and manic energy, Steve sees something else, something that has the hurt of missing Eddie increasing ten-fold, something that has him seriously considering taking an ax to all his contracts and his career and his livelihood and getting on the next plane to Cincinnati.
Eddie left his pockets untucked.
#tour dates are vaguely inspired by the US leg of Metallica’s Damaged Justice tour#features some sneaky secret-relationship bits i yoinked out of the day-1 prompt i lost control of#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie week 2024#long post for “long” prompt ig lol#might come back and edit this a bit more tmrw
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— READING BETWEEN THE LINES
pairing: suguru geto x f!reader
tags: dc, noncon, fingering, forced orgasm, pwp, use of pet names (sweetheart), suguru being condescending lol
wc: 1.4k
summary: Breaking up with Suguru doesn't go as well as you had hoped.
a/n: idk what possessed me ngl! writing warmup that got out of hand ig lol. dividers by @/adornedwithlight! ao3 link here.
This is always the worst part, the anticipation of the unknown. You dragged Suguru into a private corner of the monastery, stating that you needed to talk to him about something important. Part of you hopes he won’t notice that something is clouding your mind, but another part of you knows how perceptive he can be – of shifting eyes, a nervous shake of the leg. Anything he sees can be interpreted and used against you. It’s just too much for you, to constantly live under his judgment and surveillance.
Once inside the room, you ask Suguru to sit down in an armchair in the corner, because when he’s at a lower height you can convince yourself he’s not nearly as intimidating as he actually is. He almost looks normal when you look down at him. But then his amber eyes catch yours, and you feel like a deer in headlights.
Breath, hold, let it out slowly.
“I think we should see other people,” you say, nearly hushed.
Suguru takes a moment to pause, before looking up at you with a smile. It’s not the reaction you wanted.
“You think?” he asks, a teasing lilt to his voice, “you wouldn’t do all of this to tell me you’re thinking of doing something.”
He’s right; you don’t like that. It only makes you uneasier, inhale shakily and exhale just as unstable.
“We should see other people,” you sigh, a knot tightening in your chest. You can’t bring yourself to look at him, opting to stare down at the ornate patterns on the carpet, anywhere but him.
“Where’s your spirit?” he asks, pouting and high-pitched, as if he’s talking down to a child, “you sound horribly unconvincing.”
You were foolish to ever think you would have an advantage against Suguru in a war of words. He’s always a few steps ahead of you, quick to retort any thought that takes days for you to mold and craft. Still, you do your best. This would be the last time anyways.
“W-we should see other people,” you repeat, attempting to sound resolute only for your voice to betray you, wavering like a tree branch in a windstorm.
“We both see plenty of people here,” he says, leaning back into the chair to sink into the fabric, his posture even more relaxed than before, “I don’t see why you dragged me in here to say this.”
For the first time, frustration overwhelms your nerves, swirls in your chest and manifests into something loud and impulsive.
“Suguru, I’m breaking up with you,” you blurt out.
An uneasy silence permeates through the room, and you feel the need to smother it. Unfortunately, any semblance of a coherent thought, much less a sentence, eludes you.
“Tell me what you really want.” Suguru says, the first to break it. You start to think the silence was better.
“I am.”
“No, you aren’t. I know you aren’t,” he says so matter-of-factly you’re close to believing him, “say it again.” Suguru shifts in the seat until he’s leaning forward, hands intertwined and planted in his lap.
“N-No, you’re just messing with me,” you say, backing away from him.
“That should be my line,” he sighs, standing from his seat. He takes a step towards you and your heart trembles. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong, I just-”
“Nothing’s wrong but you want to break up?” he interrupts, crossing his arms as he glares at you.
“No, I mean-” you fumble your words, unsure how to mitigate the situation. Suguru takes another step towards you, and you take another one back.
“Mean what?” The corners of his lips upturn, and you both know he has you cornered.
You stand there, finally at a loss for words. Even if you were able to articulate your thoughts, you know that Suguru would twist them in his favor.
“See? You don’t even know what you want,” he says, condescension dripping from his words before he softens his tone into something gentler. The way you would speak to a wounded animal. “But it’s okay, because I do.”
Suguru takes the opportunity to close the distance, taking your hand into his and pulling you into a kiss. His lips crash into yours and you writhe under his touch, desperately pushing him away. But all you get is an arm latched around your waist, the sensation of your bodies pressed together in a suffocating heat. His lips finally part from yours, and you rush to turn your face away from his.
“Suguru, please stop,” you whimper.
“Why? You’ll just lie again,” he answers, his hand reaching for your chin to turn you towards him, “don’t you know how much that hurts me?” he asks, voice too sweet to be genuine.
You do your best to keep your eyes away from him, the only form of protest you can afford right now. He’s unphased by it, releasing his grip on your chin to lift the hem of your skirt and trace the undeniable wet spot on your underwear.
“And it seems like your body is more honest than your words,” he whispers dangerously low in your ear, as if it’s a dirty secret he had the privilege of uncovering. You don’t want to give him the satisfaction but you don’t have much of a choice.
He pulls your underwear down, lets it fall unceremoniously onto the floor. Before long, his fingers find your clit and you wince at the contact. You bite down on your lips when he starts drawing lazy circles, not wanting to give him any more ammunition to use against you.
“You don’t actually want to leave, do you?” he whispers sweetly, and it makes your breath catch for all the wrong reasons. His fingers slowly but surely pick up the pace, and it gets harder to choke back your moans. You attempt to maneuver yourself away from his touch, but that only makes him press himself harder against you, tightening his grip against your waist.
“You’re just misbehaving because I haven’t given you enough attention, right? Then I’ll give you all the attention you want.”
“Suguru, please, I don’t want this,” you cry, and it’s nowhere close to convincing, too high-pitched and whiny.
“We’ve got to work on your communication skills, sweetheart. They’re a hallmark of a good relationship, you know. And I only want the best with you,” he coos, almost songlike. His fingers build up to a steady pace and you feel your muscles involuntarily tighten, prepare yourself for the climax to come.
“We can even try it now. Tell me, how does this feel?” He slips a finger in and you writhe under his grip.
“Suguru, stop!” you squeal, tears forming in your eyes, making the colors of the room blend and blur together.
“Don’t think that’s the right answer,” he says in that patronizing tone again, and you can hear the pout in his voice. As punishment he slips in another finger, and within moments he’s bullying the spot that has you crying from pleasure like he’s done so many times before. Your fingers grip around his arm, nails digging into his skin and leaving crescent indents in his skin, but Suguru is nothing if not determined.
“I just don’t see why you’d want to leave when I do all of this for you.” The arm around your waist finally releases, only for his other hand to trace the curves of your body until it reaches your clit. He starts building the pressure again, slow circles to contrast against the rapid pace of his fingers.
Your breathing destabilizes as your muscles tense up again against your will. You know you’re getting close, which means Suguru knows as well.
“Let it all out for me, sweetheart,” And you do, body shivering and walls clamping around his finger like a vice. The rush of heat and pleasure running through you is too much, and you fall back onto old habits, closing your eyes and moaning his name like a mantra as he guides you through your climax. Suguru only pulls himself out of you once your breathing stabilizes, when you finally come out of your postorgasmic daze and the tears start running down your cheeks.
He gently holds your face, rubbing the tears with his thumb before laying a soft kiss on your cheek.
“If this is what you wanted, you should’ve told me. Spare me the theatrics next time, okay?”
#sen writes#sen fics#s.jjk#cw.noncon#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#suguru geto x reader#suguru getou x reader#jjk smut#suguru geto smut
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.
#vent post uwu havent seen those in a while have we <33#looks like a depressive episode again#aw shucks#:/#laid in bed all day. did absolutely nothing. slept for 18 hours.#havent washed my hair since saturday. havent taken my thyroid meds in three days so idk that may have sth to do with this too ig#my flat is a total mess and im ignoring all uni groupchats (uni itself as well) and non-groupchats too.#only pretending im Normal to my best friend even tho she explicitly asked me to tell her when im feeling Bad and she does reach out to me#with her problems but i just cant bring myself to talk to her about mine#also i miss my ed so badly i need it back desperately. and i mean DESPERATELY.#anyway. something is seriously seriously wrong with me rn. like fr.#and i still haven't found the earring kms#had a bit of a ✨strongly suicidal✨ moment yesterday like it really made me go Wowwwwww girl hold yer horses cause yeah.#we havent seen that one in a while either#(no matter what my evil poll tags might have said lmao). anyway. absolutely horrible last two days.#and i once again feel like the worst and most useless and most disgusting person in the world.#my body is trash and there's nothing in this world that i hate more than it. i wish it would just. evaporate. whatever.#i hate it with a passion. peace and love.
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I absolutely loved your sanji fic!! You wrote it so well and so insanely hot but i was wondering if you would write something for buggy?
Like, imagine him letting you use his hand like a toy or something
thank you so much for the kind words and the request!! I did take this for a bit of a spin, so I hope it's still okay, but with that being said, this is wild, pure and unadulterated filth, and I wish I was sorry for this, but I'm really not. Read the tags, and if you don't like the sound of them, please just scroll.
word count: ~2k
warnings: SMUT. 18+ only. MDNI. pwp filth. free use and objectification. masturbation and fingering. pussy slapping. voyeurism. somnophilia. dacryphilia. probs dub-con and loser/perv!buggy. some degradation. swearing. do Buggy's DF powers need a warning? well, here it is anyway, ig.
Sweet Dreams
The first time it happened, you thought you had dreamt it.
You had had a conversation with the Captain ages ago but had thought barely anything of it yourself after and doubted he would act on it, so the following day, you had convinced yourself it had just been your imagination running wild. Because, surely, there was no way that Buggy would have come into your room at night.
Besides, you would have woken up if he had, right?
But then, you kept having this dream. And it always felt so real and began the same way. You would stir in your sleep as you felt his hand graze your face softly, letting you lean into his touch. He would hold you briefly before slowly walking down to the edge of your bed covers, pulling them down to reveal your body.
He would take his time touching you in one way or another. Sometimes, he would take his time and spend ages just teasing you and letting his hands roam over your body and groping your breasts, toying with your nipples, touching you anywhere but there. You'd wake up hot and agitated as your body was practically on fire at the memory of his touch.
Other nights, you would be startled by the gentle pull of your leg, spreading your thighs open. While the first time it happened was quite a shock, you welcomed it now. You would go to sleep, hoping to feel him on you again. For his fingers to rub over your clit, slip through your folds and fill you up until you were whimpering for a release.
And each time it happened, he'd get rougher, move faster, deeper and harsher. Fucking you with his fingers until the bed shook. That is when you would try to reach for him, for anything, just to be disappointed with the dreamscape because he wasn't there with you.
But, fuck, did you wish he was. More and more each night until, one day, you whined out for him in desperation. Like a dam had broken open, your room flooded with moans of his name. First, soft whimpers, but as time passed, his name echoed through you louder and louder.
'I'm so- I'm so close, Buggy. Fuck,' you cried out, feeling that familiar tightness in your body, growing tighter, ready to snap, but the release came in the cruellest form with his hand disappearing from between your legs.
The disappointment of the ruined climax practically woke you up, and you stared at the dark ceiling, trying to catch your breath. Why did he have to stop there? You were so close you just needed a few more seconds.
Your chest finally began to rise and fall at a normal pace, and you were ready to close your eyes again to fall back asleep when you heard the sound of a slow clap.
As it kept going, you jumped up in bed to be greeted with the sight of your captain standing on the threshold, applauding you from across the room.
'Captain?' you blinked, trying to make sure you were seeing things correctly, 'what- what are you doing here?'
'I couldn't help myself, baby.' While you had tried to speak with a hushed tone, considering the late hour, he never had been the considerate type of other people's sleep schedules and spoke just like any other time.
He smiled as he began making his way towards your bed. 'You just sounded so pretty, making such a mess of yourself and then-' his excitement doubled with each word he said. 'Well, and then you said my name, and I swear I could just about cream my pants!'
A shriek escaped you when, out of nowhere, he jumped up on top of you, arms on either side, locking you in between his body, his face nearly pressing against yours. So close you could feel his breath on you when he spoke again, this time in an almost disappointed growl. 'You know how long I waited for you to say it? Just an itty bitty moan, anything, but you never had. Never moaned my name before. Why's that, hmm?'
'I-' you stuttered, but he kept on going.
'Don't I make you feel good?' His lips turned into an exaggerated pout. You tried to say something but were simply too stunned to form a response, and so, even though Buggy had pulled away already, he pressed his face once again up against yours to practically shout. 'Well!? What is it?! Would you rather have someone else fuck you every night?!'
'No, captain.' You finally managed to say. 'I just- I didn't think it was real.' It must have all been a dream, right?
'Oh, it's real, alright.' He was giggling now, one of his hands brushing over your hair softly. 'All those times you came, that was all me, baby!' He gave you a sloppy kiss on the forehead and sighed out in relief. 'Just wish I was here to see it before.'
And that's when you felt it. Despite him still, practically, lying on top of you with his arms over your head, you felt his hand roam over your upper thigh. The closer he came to reaching your pussy, the wider his smile grew. 'Whatcha think, wanna finally put on a proper show for me, baby?'
'What do you-' you weren't sure where the captain was going with this.
'C'mon,' he pressed his lips against your ear, sending shivers through your entire body. 'Wanna see how you've been fucking yourself with my hand all this time.' To emphasise his demand, you were surprised with a slap across your clit. If it wasn't for the fact that he had all his weight pressed on you, you would have jerked up from the sensation.
Finally, he got up, and you watched him search the room for a place to sit, picking up the clothes you had mindlessly discarded on the armchair in the corner. He took the items of clothing, one by one, just to throw them right onto the ground, except for a pair of your panties, which he stuffed into his back pocket. He then fell back into the chair and, with a satisfied smile, called out to you, 'aand... action.'
But you didn't move. Unsure of what to do, your self-consciousness only being enhanced by his strict gaze entirely focused on you, you froze.
'I said, action.' Buggy repeated himself. 'Is there a problem, deary?'
You shook your head. 'No, I just... well I'm not really sure what to do, I guess.'
'Aww, there's no need to be shy. I mean,' he laughed, 'It's not like it will be your first time, but alright let me help- do you need a hand, baby?' He made himself giggle as the hand in question was already between your legs.
'Ok, ok,' he jumped around in his seat. 'Please, get comfortable, and here, I'll even look away.' He covered his eyes with his hand, but even in the dark, you could tell he wasn’t able to hold in his laugh, and his fingers were spread apart for him to have you in his full view.
You knew he had no intention of leaving. And after all, he had done so much for you... and even now, there would be so little you would be doing for him. All the pleasure would be yours. Just the way he looked at you, with that hunger in his eyes, it made your head spin. It may be better to just look away yourself. So, you let yourself fall back onto your pillow.
As you did so, his hand found its spot between your legs, one finger already over your pussy. If there had been any doubt about it really being Buggy who was touching you, it evaporated at the sound of his excited laugh as he felt you squirm.
'That's what I'm talking about, baby!' He cheered, and god, if you dared to talk like that to your captain, you would have told him to shut up.
'Please,' you said instead, feeling that unfulfilled sensation creep up inside you, reminding you of all the nights before, but mostly, the orgasm he had ruined minutes ago. But his hand kept up with his sly movements, only gently moving up and down your slit, never crossing the line to give you the needed satisfaction.
To get that, you knew what you had to do. You knew what he wanted you to do.
So, you reached down to meet his fingers. They practically wrapped around yours, almost affectionately, and you could feel the juices accumulated over his callouses while he teased you.
Once he felt your grip on him, he adjusted his fingers, positioning them just right for you. It wouldn't be any different from before, you tried to tell yourself, and if anything, this gave you control, wouldn't it?
Perhaps you were moving too slowly for his liking. Still in your hold, you felt him pull himself closer to you, to your pussy. You didn't try to hold him back when he finally entered you. Two slender fingers filling you, accompanied by your relieved moan of satisfaction.
But that is where he stopped. Deep inside you, he didn't move a muscle.
The rest was up to you.
It's like any other toy, you told yourself, pulling him away slowly, then pulling him back. The friction was there, but you needed more, so you kept going, trying to find the right balance between speed and force. Soon enough, you could focus on the pleasure and how his fingers were making you feel, and the moans and whimpers seeped out between your lips, immediately rousing Buggy.
'That's right. Fuck my hand like the dirty whore you are.' The excitement in his voice was almost scary, vibrating straight through the room to you.
'Buggy!' You cried out at his words.
'Sorry, sorry.' He pulled himself back. 'But can you blame me? Fuck. You're just so tight and wet. Come on, keep going.' You dared to glance his way, ensure that he still sat where you had last seen him and, indeed, he sat in that armchair, legs spread, almost inviting, and a visible tent in his trousers.
He just sat there, enjoying the show you put on for him.
And you did as you were told, thrusting his hand in and out of you. It was impossible to tell what was his or your doing, and it didn’t matter. All you cared to think about was how good he felt, hitting all the right spots inside you as you pushed him deeper.
‘Buggy,’ you moaned.
‘That’s right. Say my name, baby,’ Buggy growled from his chair. As he spoke, you felt his hand tense up inside you, push deeper into you, fingers spreading slightly.
‘Fuck, yes. Do that again.’ You were a mess, with hair sprawled out at all angles and sweat appearing in a sheer sheet over your body from the intensity of your movements. But you could swear that when you looked at your captain, it was as if he was watching a masterpiece unfold. Although, at the sound of your demand, something in him quirked.
‘What was that?’
‘Please, Buggy, do that again… that, with your fingers.’ You pleaded, trying to keep up your own pace.
‘Oh, sweetheart, I think you got this all wrong.’ Slowly, he got up from the chair. His hand stilled within you; no matter what you tried to do with it, it wouldn’t budge. You stared up at him until he reached the side of your bed, leaning over you, pressing his other hand over your face, bringing your cheeks in until you could feel his fingertips against your teeth.
‘You don’t tell me what to do. Ever!’ He shouted the last word into your face. ‘Got it?’
In his hold, you could only nod your head in agreement.
‘Good,’ he sat down, much happier with the situation. ‘Now, where were we, hmm? Oh, that’s right—’ While he had been telling you off, you had let go of his hand, so now he had the complete freedom to move as he pleased. And so, he pulled out of you, and before you had the chance to protest or respond, you felt the sting of another harsh slap across your pussy.
Without another warning, he was inside you again, moving at a pace you could never reach, practically drilling his fingers into you. You grabbed onto the sheets, eyes shut, but not for long. Only until Buggy had noticed you doing so.
‘No, no, no. That won’t do. Look at me.’ He snapped his fingers in front of your face. ‘Look at me when I fuck you.’
‘I’m sorry,’ you apologised with heavy breaths. ‘Just feels so— you feel so good. Fuck.’
‘Hmm, I know.’ He squatted beside the bed, crossing his arms to pillow his chin on, with a big, wicked, but extremely adoring smile. ‘So, why don’t you cum on my fingers, baby. Soak ‘em for me.’
You were undoubtedly getting there, the build-up of two ruined orgasms making things feel even worse, more sensitive. Tears pooled in the corners of your eyes, and you could sense how Buggy was watching them drop.
‘That’s it.’ He whispered with an intensity you had never heard before. ‘Come for me.’
And so, you did. The pleasure washed over you like a tsunami with a scream that must have woken up the entire sideshow, but it did not stop Buggy from letting his fingers have his way with you until long after you cried out his name for the so-manieth time.
‘Thank you,’ you managed to say when he finally pulled out of you. In the instant moment, it was like your whole body was released from a tight rope and fell into the comfort of the mattress.
‘Believe me,’ he snickered, reattaching his hand to bring it up to his lips, sucking all of you off his fingers, dramatically so. ‘It was my pleasure.’
the end
thank you for reading!! if you enjoyed this story, please reblog it to spread the word around, and I would love to hear your thoughts so leave a comment or a message.
INBOX < for comments, thoughts (and thots) and other requests
My One Piece masterlist is still underworks, but will be linked soon.
#buggy x reader#buggy x y/n#buggy the clown#buggy smut#buggy the clown smut#smut#opla smut#one piece smut#buggy fanfiction#fanfiction#fanfic#wtf am i doing with my life#how did i get here
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heads up there are accounts on here within the cod fandom planning to mass report accounts that post dubcon/noncon fics. would be a shame to lose you to those losers
Yeah, I figured out that would happen eventually when I started getting weird comments and anonymous asks about my noncon stuff lmao mini rant ahead.
Whatever happens happens ig, I have my stuff backed up but it's annoying and discouraging to see people deciding to comment hate on dub-con/non-con fics as if there isn't a warning for that type of content on the beginning of every single dark fic I make. I've had people tell me I'm normalizing sexual assault/rape as if I'm not a victim myself, and that's mainly why I've stayed away from writing dark fics until lately.
The community can be exhausting, giving people the chance to remain anonymous and say all the stupid shit they want to say without any consequences to it. Can't even count the number of things I've deleted from my inbox and never bothered answering because they're simply weird, hateful, and just make me tired as hell.
It's insane how impossible it seems to be for people to simply scroll away when you see warnings of topics you don't like or that trigger you. Truly, it's as simple as blocking an account or dismissing the post, there are tags you can blacklist as well, so why does it seem so difficult to use common sense?
Anyway, just woke up and I'm exhausted. I'm going to be taking a small break from Tumblr and writing while I work on some other stuff and try to get inspiration for my fics<3 I love you guys, I've always been immensely thankful for the support I've gotten. We're at 4438 followers now, should get to 4500 by tomorrow. I'll come back with hopefully more original ideas and more practice!<3
If any of you guys would like to play MW2/MW3, hmu! andddd to my mutuals, if you wanna add me on discord lmk<3
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The Same Boat
ask; hi sorry if this is too much detail but a request for reader the same age as Luke and joins the camp at around 16-17 but they had a really nice life before joining camp half blood and really hates the camp because she deeply misses her friends and boyfriends and girlfriends, and it takes place when she’s first joining and she points out to Luke how terrible the system is and they bond over being really angry about the gods. thank u!!!
pairing(s); luke castellan x gn!reader (romantic or platonic, not exactly specified but leaning more towards platonic)
warning(s); daddy issues ig
a/n; i changed the story a lil bit so that the reader didn’t just get to camp, but got there a little bit ago and was given a quest which ended a lil bit before the fic starts, hope u don’t mind. pre-lightning thief. i had ares in mind as reader’s gp but it’s not specified, i did refer to them as a dad and their mortal parent as a mom though
it’s been a while since i’ve read the books and i personally never got the luke hype so sorry if it’s a little ooc, also a bit short. had book luke in mind while writing but could be read for book or series luke ig if you ignore minor physical descriptions
art credits(left to right); velinxi, velinxi, frostbite studios
You had never known who your godly parent was.
You’d always assumed it was one of the minor gods, since the satyr assigned to your school hadn’t sought you out until you were old enough to drive. Either that or you just weren’t ‘gifted’ enough to garner much attention. You didn't know which you preferred.
In a way, it didn’t really matter. No one claimed you anyway, so you spent the first couple weeks of your stay at Camp Half-Blood — a very inconspicuous name, by the way — in cabin eleven, the Hermes Cabin.
It was a rough adjustment. You were resentful of this new world; a world of gods and monsters and magic and so many weird stories that made it hard to keep track of every twist and turn and easy to offend whichever god whose myths or name you got confused. You felt like someone was watching you at all times. Or would it be the opposite, since your godly parent clearly didn’t care enough to claim you as their own?
It didn’t help much when you were assigned a quest, either. Or rather, one of your friends were.
Austin Lake, a child of Apollo, was tasked to retrieve his father’s lyre from a forest — not just any forest, no, the Grove of Demeter. Or at least, a recreation of it, anyway. According to Austin, Demeter had banned his father from ever entering the Grove again when he’d had a little too much ‘fun’ with one of the wood nymphs there, so he needed his son to go fetch his lost toy.
Bit derogatory, you thought. We’ve been reduced to well-trained dogs.
Still, you tagged along.
There were a couple hiccups along the way, which you were told were par for the course by Chiron, who welcomed you back rather dismissively once you returned. Normally, you would’ve been offended. I mean, you get back from a not-so-semi life threatening outing, and all you get is a halfhearted pat on the back? Honestly.
But you couldn’t really find it in yourself to care. Not today.
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You sat on the hillside as you watched the sunset. Wind carried the sweet scent of ripe strawberries from the fields along with the smell of dirt and other greenery as the grass beneath you swayed in the breeze. The blades tickled your skin as you basked in the calm silence of everything — something fairly unusual for this place, as far as you could tell from your stay so far.
You, however, did not feel calm. Quite the opposite, in fact. Your feelings toward the world of Greek mythology hadn’t been good in the first place, to say the least; you’d had to practically abandon any and all traces of your life back home in order to get here since you’d been discovered so late. You missed your friends (whom you assumed would be worried sick by now, since cell service was pretty much nonexistent here and you’d only been able to contact a few of them via post), and you missed the taste of actual junk food that came from cans and bags. You even missed school, as boring and hellish as it was. At least it offered a sense of normalcy that you so desperately needed right about now.
“Room for one more?” A voice asked, snapping you out of your thoughts. You turned to see Luke standing beside the pine on top of the hill, a Coca Cola in either hand. There was a small smile on his lips as he said, “I brought drinks.”
You smiled back at him, mostly out of courtesy but also at his offer. It was as if he'd read your mind. “Sure, if you want.”
Luke strolled down to sit beside you, handing you one of the fizzy drinks and popping his own. The can was pleasantly cool to the touch, a stark contrast to the harsh sunlight hitting your skin. “Thanks.” You muttered, taking the soda with a grateful look.
“Don’t mention it,” he replied. “We keep a secret stash of six-packs in the kitchen for special occasions. The harpies are pretty easy to bribe.”
Silence settled between the two of you as you sipped on your drinks. You stared straight ahead as you did before, but now you caught glimpses of Luke’s sandy blond hair out of the corner of your eye.
It was… awkward.
Luke had always been a bit of a mystery for you. Sure, you saw him as a friendly guy, and he had been nice to you ever since your first day here, but you noticed little details the younger or happier campers didn’t.
He never really liked talking about his father, Hermes, despite having been claimed almost as soon as he got to Camp. Okay, maybe that was fair, since he had to deal with loads of hopeful, undetermined campers asking him when they would be claimed, too.
‘Oh, I was claimed the minute I got here. But since your godly parent didn’t claim you yet, I guess they just don’t care about you.’
Yeah, not a great thing to tell a twelve-year-old.
Luke was also pretty closed off in general. He was an easy guy to make friends with, sure. But other than surface-level stuff like what color he likes or which Camp activities were his favorite, only one or two people knew much of anything about his personal life. Which was to say, his life before coming here, since it’d be pretty hard to have a ‘personal life’ when you lived in cabin eleven year-round.
You remembered the night before you took off for the quest. Luke’s face illuminated by flames as he burnt his nightly offerings with the rest of the camp, his expression one you could still clearly picture. A mellow bitterness — something kept suppressed for years, stacking and stacking and never getting cleaned out, building like dust and cobwebs on top of an old dresser. It was a face you assumed you'd wear eventually, too.
And that wasn’t even mentioning all the time he spent in the arena. His swordsmanship was the definition of textbook when he was training other campers, but it was a whole different story if you happened to stumble across him practicing on dummies in his spare time. His swings were quick and precise, as usual. However, there was an almost brutal quality to him as he maimed the dummy, slashing it as if it'd slaughtered his entire family.
Not that it would be that weird if the dummy had actually murdered them, Greek mythology and all.
Anyway.
“So...” Luke started. Then he must've realized he didn't really know what to say. He stared straight ahead and tapped his finger on his knee.
“So...” You repeated. You could tell he had something to say to you, he just didn't know the best way to go about it. After all, who would waste contraband on someone they didn't really know if it wasn't to sweeten them up before asking a favor? “..Did you need something?”
Luke opened his mouth, but hesitated before saying anything. “Actually.. yeah.”
See? No one's that nice.
“I kinda heard what happened,” He continued. You picked at the tab of your can, avoiding eye contact. Of course he knew. Something like that can't exactly stay a secret for long in a place like this. “I overheard Austin talking to Chiron about it?”
Well, fuck him then.
“He mentioned you wanna keep it on the down-low, so, your secret's safe with me.” He quickly added, giving you a reassuring smile.
“Oh, um...” You didn't really know what to say to that. It was bound to get out eventually, so it was the sentiment that mattered, you guessed. “Thanks.”
“Least I could do,” He nodded. “It was supposed to be a secret anyway, right?”
“I guess.”
“...It's bound to get out eventually though.”
You sighed. There was no actual hope with keeping this a secret, after all. The best you could do was a 'everyone knows about it but we don't talk about it' secret.
“I know, don't remind me.” You muttered. “I mean, it'd be hard to hide moving to a different cabin, wouldn't it?”
Luke chuckled. “I can't speak from personal experience, but yeah, probably.”
You groaned, hiding your face in your hands. You felt like pulling your hair out. “How much do you know?”
“Not that much,” he shrugged. You didn't need to look at him to know he was lying, you had a pretty good track record of telling when someone was. “Just that you got claimed, and you're not happy about it.”
“How could I be happy about it?” You burst out, straightening your back as you whipped your head up. Your hands spread out in front of you and your heels dug into the ground beneath them. “I never wanted this life! What, I’m supposed to be grateful that my deadbeat dad finally showed up? That he finally ‘claimed’ me? What is there to be grateful for? That isn’t even the bare fucking minimum of being a parent!”
Luke tensed. You didn’t blame him. The gods were always listening, somehow omnipresent but not enough to be there for their own kids. Fucking ridiculous.
Against your better judgement, your rant continued, spilling out of your mouth like word vomit.
“It's not like I expect him to be there for every step of my life, but would it have killed him to show his face, willingly, just once? My mom works three jobs just to keep a place for the two of us to stay! What, he couldn't send child support every now and then? He's a fucking god! What good is being a god if you aren't there for the people you're supposed to be taking responsibility for?”
“Yeah, I hear that.”
You scoffed. “Sure you do.”
“I'm serious.” Luke defended, putting his can down on the ground. “I've only met my dad once, and even for a god he was kinda shitty.”
You raised an eyebrow at him.
“Okay, fine. He was completely shitty.” Luke admitted. With a bit of hesitation, he elaborated further, fidgeting with a blade of grass.
“Before I came to Camp, I was on the run.” He said, a faraway look in his eyes, almost as if he were talking about a different lifetime. “It was me, Annabeth and Thalia.”
“Thalia as in..?”
“Yeah,” he said, a bitter smile on his lips as he glanced back at the tall pine tree that stood at the top of the hill. “That's her.”
You bit your lip as you stared at the pine. Now that you knew there was a story behind it, your mind played tricks on you. The branches were suddenly outstretched arms, the leaves spiky hair and you could have sworn you could make out the shape of a face in the pattern of the bark.
“This one time, Thalia was hurt, and we needed a place to stay for a bit. Since we were desperate and not really thinking straight, we went to my mom's place.” He sighed. “When we got there... I met him.”
Luke took a deep breath, his eyebrows furrowing as if just thinking about that moment physically hurt. “I'd known what I was for a while. Prayed to my dad a couple times, too, but he never got back to me. When I met him at that house, I asked him for help. I knew we wouldn't be safe at mom's. I asked him for guidance... and he said no.”
You nodded along with his words. The sun was beginning to set now, a light chill in the air. The sky was a golden orange, which bathed everything out of the shadows in a yellow light. Luke's eyes looked almost the same color as the light reflected off of them.
“If he'd just told us where to go then and there, if he told us about this place...” He trailed off. He clenched his jaw before drinking the last of his coke and flattening the can. “Thalia would still be alive. Living. She wouldn't be...”
Silence settled between the two of you again. Luke didn't want to talk about it any longer, and, as curious as you were, you didn't want to pry. But it was less awkward this time around, a mutual understanding connecting you both.
“Kind of a dick move.” You remarked quietly. To your surprise, Luke laughed.
“Kind of?” He raised an eyebrow.
“Nah, total dick move.” You corrected yourself. You gave him a small smile. “Both our dads are jerks. Guess it runs in the family.”
“That's one thing.”
“Yeah? What’s the other?”
Luke shook his head, the corner of his lip tilting up into a half smile. “Maybe I’ll tell you later.”
You rolled your eyes. “Lame.”
The sky was turning purple now, a vibrant shade that leaned mire towards red than blue. Though soon it would be the other way around, and the harpies would come out to scare any campers who were out past curfew. You’d heard rumors that Mr.D allowed them to eat the strays sometimes, but you doubted they were true. Travis and Connor were still alive, after all. Though maybe they’d just never been caught.
Your run in with your father played on repeat in your head, each loop accentuating one horrible thing about it or the other. You fidgeted with the grass, ripping a few blades out of the ground. You bit your lip. Should you tell him about it? It would probably be good to get it off your chest. Plus, Luke actually understood how much this shit sucked.
“…You know what he said to me? When he saw me?” You finally muttered, deciding to trust him, just a bit. “He didn’t even recognize me, but I knew. The second I saw him, it was like something clicked. It took him a while, but when he made the same connection… He said, ‘shoot.’”
You laughed humorlessly. “‘Shoot.’ Like I was some piece of homework he forgot to do, and not his kid he abandoned before I was even born. I wanted to strangle him, I swear, but…”
You trailed off. You didn’t want to admit it, but your father was terrifying.
‘Watch the attitude.’ He had said, his hulking form growing until he was almost level with the trees surrounding him. ‘I don’t take disrespect, especially not from my own kids.’
I’m not your kid, you now thought, biting the inside of your cheek. He had never been a dad to you. As far as you were concerned, you didn’t have a father.
“I wished he were gone.”
…
You felt Luke’s gaze on the side of your head, practically boring holes into your skull. You glanced at him. Maybe you shouldn’t have told—
“You didn’t deserve that.” Luke suddenly said, a fire behind his words you’d never heard before. “None of us do.”
He stopped for a moment, his jaw clenched. Taking a deep breath, he turns his body towards you, facing you completely. There was no mistaking it now; there was gold swirling behind his blue irises.
“I have a proposition you might wanna hear.”
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