#anyway Rei is the most character ever

[vulturevanity]

Read Not So Shoujo Love Story on Webtoon if you want an ass kicking

[cyellolemon]

btw i ship all akam hirorei and furukaza and they're all t4t for me

[reikunrei]

remembering the final stroke part 2........... how did they make that shit so bad

[yeokii]

ㅤㅤㅤㅤ ㅤㅤ   𝓐.DORE YOU ❨ 이희승 ❩

꒰ synopsis ꒱ all hopes were crushed when you realized there was no way to get close to your crush, choi beomgyu. your advances to get close to him never seemed to work. so, you decided to get closer to his best friend, heeseung, by joining the broadcasting club. but as scripts change, so do crushes, and you end up falling for his best friend instead.

▸ auditions are open . . . !

ㅤ❕MATCHMAKER ── crush's bsf ! heeseung x reader

fast forward  ⃕ [ genre ] : written, fluff, 90s/20th century girl au, slowburn

meet the members ! beomgyu, soobin, jungwon, karina, rei, sunghoon, lia, my ocs

warnings 𖧷 angst but also teeth rotting fluff, suggestive ─ kissing; making out, cursing, skinship, afab reader, mentions of parties and underage drinking, slowburn like actual slowburn u might fall asleep, heeseung has mommy and daddy issues (erm), mentions of injuries (nothing serious) heeseung is mean at first gn, heeseung typical cold kdrama ml, beomgyu fboy era real (01z on top what can I say) lmk if there's anything I missed!

ㅤhe's a real catch ▹ 23K (lol what.)

⌕ [ archives ] one result found . . . hi hi my heeseung long fic era is finally here !! also happy early birthday to my sewlmate @yenqa hope u like my silly little work books butt!!! I had the urge to write a hee fic after watching a time called you (but my inspo is mostly from 20th century girl) also yes I tried a diff type of writing so hopefully it doesn't come out as childish eurm and I did not mean to make it this long bye also ty yen yen for making my synopsis and for proof reading !! (love ya stinkabutt) alsooo the end won't be like the end?? like ill write some drabbles for this!! I just wanted to get this over with lmao anyways hope you enjoy !! reblogs and comments r very much appreciated ^^

The fall of nineteen-ninety-six marked a pivotal moment in your life. Ever since you came into the world, you never really could grasp the concept of love. You wrapped your head around the myths and tales your mother would read to you every night. You thought that every princess would have her own shining knight in armour. So after thirteen years of living, where was yours?

Your knight in shining armour, or knights in shining armour, existed within the pages of the comic books you read. You often wondered if they would magically pop out of your books and transport you into their world.

Similarly, you wondered whether any of the characters from your adored TV shows  would step out and bring you into their lives.

So, it wasn't a surprise when your jaw dropped to the ground as you saw the most beautiful man in your life (well, technically, boy). If the epitome of beauty was a fourteen-year-old boy, it would be Beomgyu.

But it wasn’t just his face that made your thirteen-year-old self swoon over him, it was also the way he acted. You loved the way he conversed, his smooth way of talking at a young age and the way he smiled at you every time he made jokes with his friends. You loved how his eyes lightened every time he’d pull a silly prank.

But the problem was, he never talked to you. You admired him from afar. You never actually had the guts to talk to him.

As if You were content with watching his funny actions from a distance. There were some moments when you pushed aside your nervousness and talked to him.

You remember having butterflies in your stomach the moment you first talked to him. There were times when you both were paired up as project partners for a biology assessment and at that moment, you swore you would have worshipped the floor that your biology teacher walked on due to her giving you an opportunity like this.

You knew this was an opportunity to make your move. And you did. You brought him small snacks with little notes on them. Gave him gifts regularly. Maybe even took lessons from your best friend on how to subtly flirt with him. You really thought you had him. Because whenever you used to play out these little acts, you saw the subtle smile on his face. You were so close. It’s like the universe laid it out for you. Gosh, how lucky you were!

Luck. The luck that you thought you had. If luck was a person, you would’ve tackled it to the ground already. Because the day you were about to confess to him was the day he announced his new girlfriend. 

His first girlfriend. You doubt you called it ‘love’ since the only thing she cared about was that he was popular and pretty. That’s it? All that girl could get from Beomgyu was his looks and his reputation. You could’ve scoffed at the sight.

Beomgyu was so much more than that. He was loyal, kind, and trustworthy. And she went for his looks. Even though she had him, you felt as if she was missing out on so much. You were partly sad due to them getting together and also due to Beomgyu getting used to his looks.

So, you were practically prancing when you heard the news of their breakup a month later. Did you care that Beomgyu was absolutely heartbroken? Well, yes, but you felt relieved that Beomgyu was finally unleashed from that mean troll's wrath.

And as he got older, he grew more handsome. And God did you love it. When you entered high school he was a completely different person. He had gotten more flirty and way more pretty. He was way out of your league. 

Out of the years you were in this crappy high school, you made absolutely no improvement in your and Beomgyu’s relationship. Beomgyu, who kept getting new flings every summer and tons of situationships seemed to discard your existence. One could only say ‘What the fuck?’

Your thoughts swirled, and you had a collection of emotions roaming around your head until your best friend jolted you back into reality with a gentle nudge on the shoulder.

“Are you even listening?” Seori’s voice cut through your thoughts, annoyed, since she had to explain what she was talking about in the first place.

“Sorry, what were you saying?” you blinked, focusing your attention on your best friend.

She sighs, “I was saying that I think Doyoung is going to ask me out.” Seori pouts “Why does he not get that I don’t like him that way, jeez.”

Her ramble about her current boy toy washed out in the background. You were once back in your thoughts until you saw him heading into the cafeteria. Beomgyu entered the cafeteria, his smile widening at something his best friend said. 

Lee Heeseung, Beomgyu’s best friend. His ride or die. As long as you can remember, they were attached to the hip. They were basically the package deal. If Beomgyu was the life of the party, Heeseung would hold up his hair while he threw up in the host’s toilet. While Beomgyu was the exact depiction of a social butterfly, Heeseung remained aloof, keeping people at arm’s length. You could only wonder how he dealt with Beomgyu’s outbursting personality.

“Earth to Y/n!” Seori snapped her fingers in front of your face which once again, brought you back to reality.

“Sorry.” you sheepishly smiled looking at your best friend's annoyed face. Your friend followed the gaze you had fixed before looking over to her. And her eyes followed the trail of your alleged ‘man’–– Beomgyu.

“Him again.” a sigh erupted from Soeri, having enough of your rambling over your four-year-old crush.

“I’m sorry, alright!” you pouted, your back hunching over the disappointing development between you two which was nowhere to be found. “He’s just so cute, God!”

Your sigh was followed by your best friend. Not long after, your best friend’s fed-up expression converted into a rather eager one.

“I got it!” she exclaimed, her hand hitting your back while she practically screamed. You winced in pain as a few fellow students gave you judgemental stares.

“All you have to do is be close with his best friend, Lee Heeseung.” she slowly said, almost like a mastermind coming up with a villainous plan–well, you would consider your best friend to be some sort of evil criminal.

But this, this opened new angles in your head. It felt like the universe–or more like your best friend–laid it out for you again. Your once unsolvable puzzle showed a new direction, and the missing piece was all in front of you. 

Okay, maybe you felt bad that you were going to use Heeseung like that, even looking forward to it. But, you were really desperate. To the point where you would actually be eager to attend Sunday mass just to ask God for Beomgyu to like you back or even spare one glance at you. Well, what could you do? 

Out of excitement, you pulled Seori in for a hug with a squeal while giving her a kiss on the cheek which she in return, yelped. “Seori, you’re a genius!”

“Yes, I know.” she laughed a bit, escaping your tight grip on her before wiping the spot you kissed her hastily with her hands.

“I mean, how hard could it be?” 

You smiled and your gaze went up to the boy you loved for most of your life, then slowly to the equally handsome boy next to him.

Jackpot.

“God you’re such a pain to be friends with!” Beomgyu scoffed with a smirk underlying in his face, his hands in his pocket.

“What? What do you mean?”

“Well, you totally ignored that girl’s attempts to hit on you.” Beomgyu said, replaying the past moment that happened five minutes ago.

“Well, she was a nerd.” Heeseung shrugged, “Not exactly my type.” the boy said as they continued walking.

Beomgyu could only sneer at the hypocritic words coming out of his best friend’s mouth, “What do you think you are?”

Heeseung stopped in his tracks, taking great offence to the oh so harsh words said by Beomgyu, “Dude.”

Beomgyu in return, slightly chuckled at his ‘hurt’ face.

“Only kidding.” he said while they continued to walk to their next class, Beomgyu slightly bumping into Heeseung as a form of apology.

“You’re lucky I’m your best friend.” Beomgyu boasted. “Or you would be off with your little nerd antics.” he continued to tease the poor boy, loving the slight reactions his best friend gave.

“Honestly, what would you do without me?” he asked, giving a pat to Heeseung’s back which hurt too much for his liking.

They continued to stroll down the corridor, continuing the conversation with bits of banter here and there.

Beomgyu and Heeseung were basically peanut butter and jelly –– they just clicked. Every time you saw or thought about Beomgyu, his other part of him was always there. But they were practically the opposite of each other. You would stay up late at night during your daily night sessions of thinking about Beomgyu where you would wonder how in the world they became friends. 

Heeseung on one hand was the most isolated person you’ve ever seen. His only friend was Beomgyu. You would only see him have a handful of acquaintances with his daily visits in the broadcasting club he was in. 

Now Beomgyu was everything but isolative. He was the star of the school. Which meant he had a shit ton of friends. He was always the centre of attention. With his contagious laughter and a knack for mischief, he perfectly complemented Heeseung’s calm demeanour. 

Heeseung felt like he was saved when Beomgyu walked in his life. No longer was he the lonely boy who sat alone in the cafeteria because they thought he was a weirdo or whatever. No longer was he the last to be picked for basketball in recess. He finally had a friend.

It was a bond that was made by the silliest circumstances. Heeseung still remembered it like it was yesterday. The day Beomgyu became his knight in shining armour. Back when Heeseung was five or six, he was troubled by the local elementary bullies he had to face every day at school. So he felt even more frustrated when he found himself stuck in a situation where he met his bully outside of school, in a park. 

While almost being suffocated as he was being grabbed by the collar, a similar aged boy kicked his left buttock from the side so he would fall. It was a silly move, yes. A bit of screaming and newly learnt cuss words came out of the bully’s mouth and a few threats made Beomgyu scared out of his ass.

He was a pussy in the first place. He always was. So this took him a lot of courage because he had to point out the wrong and fight for justice, or so his favourite superhero at the time said. So naturally after putting on a tough facade, it quickly crumbled when the bully was about to throw a punch which made Beomgyu grab Heeseung’s hand and run. 

To this day, nothing really changed. Heeseung is still the same shy, quiet kid he was and Beomgyu was still a pussy who acts before he thinks. And together they were the perfect match for each other. 

You walked through the bustling hallways, barely managing to make it out alive with the sweaty teens packed inside, chattering away. As usual, it was always packed the minute the annoying school bell rang. You held onto the strawberry flavoured juice box you bought earlier as a gift for Heeseung so he knows that you come with good intentions –– kind of.

At the end of the corridor you made it to the broadcasting room. You felt a bit nervous, contemplating whether to do this or not. But you couldn’t back out now. This was your last shot at getting close to Beomgyu. Obviously you couldn’t.

You entered the meeting room with a nervous smile to see the faces of familiar people you saw in this school. The room looked cosy. There was obviously the recording studio across the room with a glass panel to see what was happening. A table in the middle, shelves with the older recordings of the morning announcements done by the seniors of the school, some bean bags here and there and a sofa at the end of the room. But what caught your eye the most was the little cork board hanging on one of the walls. It was decorated by a handful of polaroids of the broadcasting club.

At the corner of your eye, you saw one picture which relieved you a bit; a picture of Heeseung smiling as widely as he can. The picture brought a sense of happiness and removed the uneasy feeling you had in your stomach. He actually had feelings and wasn't a statue all the time.

Your thoughts were broken by the president of the club, Soobin. “Hi, you must be Y/n, yeah?” 

To your eye level, you could only see his chest, so you had to look up to the sun to see his face. Jeez, was he tall. “Hi, yes I am. I came to join the club.” You spoke up nervously.

“Great! Welcome to the club, we’re happy to have you here.” Soobin warmly smiled, looking back at his members, prompting them to welcome, which earnt a cheery ‘hello’ from everyone except for the boy sitting at the end of the table, secretly rolling his eyes which you clearly noticed.

You didn’t know why he was like this with you. What did you do wrong? Well, technically you were about to do something wrong, considering the entire reason you joined the club was to use Heeseung as your own little puppet to get close with Beomgyu.

You sat on the only seat available, which was next to Karina. She greeted you with a comforting smile. A few minutes into the meeting and you already like you belong here even though you didn’t know jackshit about broadcasting or the fact that you would be scared out of your mind to do the morning announcements.

But aside from that, you felt like you had a good time. Except one thing was bugging you. The most important thing you came for. Heeseung. He converted and engaged in the conversation but had kept a distance with you. You, who didn’t do anything to him at all. More than you were hurt, you were confused. Trying to remember what you had done in the past to upset Heeseung, but none came to mind.

Every time you had given out a suggestion, everyone agreed except for him. He kept quiet when you opened your mouth. The uneasy feeling was eating you away so you leaned over to Karina. 

“Is he always like this?” you asked her, your head discreetly pointing at Heeseung.

Karina followed your gaze and looked over to Heeseung, “Like what?” she looked over back to you, confused.

You hesitated for a second before spilling out the words, “Is he always this… cold?” 

Karina chuckled softly, “Yes, but he’s sweet. He’ll take some time to warm up to you.” She reassured you, putting her hand on your shoulder. “Don’t worry.”

This somewhat settled the uneasy feeling that roamed around your body. You engaged yourself back into the conversation the meeting currently had. And before you knew it, the meeting ended and the members bid Goodbye to each other, not forgetting about you. 

Heeseung was quick to leave the club, simply waving to the people present in the club, looking past you with no emotion on his face. You felt like banging your head on the wall. What the heck did you do for him to hate you already? One look at you and he already despised you. Shit, were you that ugly? You touched your face, thinking if you looked unpresentable, but that didn’t make sense. You looked fairly average and well there seemed to be nothing wrong with you.

Shit. 

Did he find out about your plan already? Fuck, fuck, fuck. Thousands of thoughts roamed around your head, each laced with panic. It couldn’t be. You hadn’t told anybody else about the plan you came up with. If he did find out, he had every right to be mad at you. You were basically using him as your puppet to get closer to Beomgyu. A slow wave of guilt was creeping over you. You cleared your throat and you bid the members that were getting ready to leave, not letting the guilt get to you. You followed Heeseung out the door and down the stairs.

You saw him walking down the stairs, his bag draped over his shoulder.

“Heeseung! Wait!” you said, rushing down the stairs. 

He turned around to see you rushing down to meet him, “Hi, um… I thought you might like this.” you said, nervously as you handed the juice box over to him.

He took it and his gaze faltered down the drink in his hand. The next thing he did was one you never expected. He scoffed. He actually scoffed. Was something funny? You didn’t get it because if there was something, you’d be the first one to laugh because you did not let any joke pass over your head. You were confused. Was he… laughing at you? 

You were the first to speak, “Did I do something wrong?”

“I’m not thirsty.” he said, looking at you. His gaze made your knees tremble. What the hell was his problem?

He handed you back the drink, but it was the least of your concerns. “Well, I’ll see you on Monday.” you said, your voice suddenly sounding dull, resisting the urge to roll your eyes.

As you passed him you heard him mutter, “You shouldn’t”

“What?” you turned back. “I don’t get what I did?”

“I just… Why’d you even join?” he turned his body and looked at you.

“I felt like it. That shouldn’t be a problem to you.” you sternly said, not caring if it came off as ‘rude’ anymore.

“It would. You’d be bored after three months and leave.” you had the strongest urge to slap him in the face. You? Bored? Like hell you were going to be. Not when you can already foresee the future where he’s going to give you one hell of a nightmare. 

“And then Soobin would have to hand over whatever comprehensible duty he gave over to you and put that on our backs.” 

You were more so shocked by his choice of words rather than angry. And currently, you wanted to pour the juice box you had in your hand over his head.

“Well I won’t, So don’t hold your breath.” your nails pricked into the cardboard of the juice box you held, trying your hardest not to twitch your face or furrow your eyebrows.

He scoffed with a stupid smirk plastered on his face, shaking his head. Putting his hands into the pockets stitched to his trousers, he walked away from you. 

“You're just like the others.”

Heeseung walked away leaving you feeling annoyed as well as frustrated. He was a complete jerk! The reassuring words Karina said to you before was no use now. You were sure he didn’t act like this when he first met the broadcasting members. So why was it only to you? But you decided it’s not worth caring anymore. He was just another obstacle in your path to making Beomgyu like you back. So you put aside your hurt feelings and straightened your back with one thing in mind; you were going to make that bastard like you.

Which is what you exactly planned on doing, standing in front of the wooden door, outside the broadcasting room again once again. 

You swallowed the big knot that rested in your throat and opened the door. To your surprise you saw Heeseung sitting on of the chairs, headphones plastered in while his fingers flipped over the pages of a comic he was reading while bopping his head to the rhythm of whatever geeky music that played through his headphones.

Maybe he didn’t hear the door creaking open or maybe he wasn’t bothered to look at you, but either way you went and sat in front of him, clearing your throat to make him look up from the comic his eyes were glued to.

You didn’t know if it was the awkward tension in the room or you dreading to ‘apologise’ to the boy in front of you, but the moment his gaze fixated on you, your heart started beating twice as fast. Maybe it was how pretty his eyes looked with his bangs covering most part of it or how he resembled an innocent bambi–

“Can I help you?” He spoke up, interrupting your thoughts about him.

“I just wanted to apologise for yesterday, I wasn’t meaning to be on edge, but I was kinda nervous with meeting new people and you ofcourse! Not that I mean it in a bad way, I don’t think you’re bad or anything I was just–” 

And then you realised that you were rambling.

In front of Lee Heeseung.

“I was just nervous.” And with that, you ended your lengthy sentence in a mutter.

You waited for Heeseung to look at you, waiting for his response and all you got was a quick sigh before he hummed.

Sorry, were you boring him?

But you did not have time to react as the door busted open with the tall president walking in, followed by Karina, Rei and Jungwon.

“Sorry guys, Lia and Taehyun got caught up with stuco meetings, but Karina will catch them up on everything.” He said, as he looked over to Karina, gaining a quick nod from her.

Everyone sat around the table as Soobin took his bulky notebook from his humongous bag that looked like it was filled with rocks. Jeez does this guy have a lot going on.

The meeting started where everyone started conversing and immersing themselves into the topics that the agenda listed. You even made a few suggestions that made the tall president smile at your already hard working attitude.

Which made you smile.

Which made Heeseung scoff.

It wasn’t a loud one, but you could definitely hear it from miles away. And even after you apologised! It made no sense, whatsoever. 

You stopped focusing on the topic at hand and looked over to Heeseung, comfortably sitting on the chair with his legs spread and his arms crossed. Oh wow.

No. You couldn’t get carried away from his figure, or whatever his arms were doing to you right now. You were supposed to hate him, right? And right now, you were just kissing his ass, which is what you’re so good at — namely, your best friend pointing that out whenever you went to milk out marks of your biology paper from Mrs. Min.

Of course you didn’t mean any of the words that flew out of your mouth when you were doing your so-called apology. It wasn’t even your fault! He was the one acting like a jerk! Not you!

But deep under all this anger and your prejudice against him, you had the horrible feeling that he knew why you were here, sitting in an uncomfortable chair with the members of the broadcasting club. 

And the truth was, he did know. He knew all about your little antics. He’s not stupid. And he’s not oblivious to see those raging eyes under that sort of cute but fake smile! In all these years of you attending this school against your will, you never spared one look at Heeseung. Your eyes were always and only on Beomgyu. So now why are you trying to befriend him? The one who was always in Beomgyu’s shadow?

Because like everyone else, you liked Beomgyu and your gateway was Heeseung. And it doesn’t take much to put two and two together, because it was the perfect plan that was all laid out. 

“So everyone is onboard with having a bake sale for the game?” Soobin asked, just to double check with everyone.

He in turn received nods and yeses from the members and brought you back into reality, stopping you from thinking about Heeseung’s cold manners anymore. 

You quickly nodded your head as well, putting your lips into a line. 

“Karina, me, Jungwon and Rei can bake the goods, yeah?” He asked for the members’ approval in which they agreed.

“Then,” He looked down at his notebook and scribbled some writings over it and looked up again, “Heeseung and Y/n would be selling them.” Soobin looked at you and Heeseung. “Lia and Taehyun can pop into help from time to time if that’s alright.”

Did you hear that right?

Your name and … Heeseung!

You tried not to show how your eyes were practically gleaming as you eagerly nodded. Meanwhile, Heeseung was not having it. He sighed like he had just been drafted into war, but nevertheless nodded his head as well, just more slowly compared to yours.

But, this opened new opportunities for you and new doors and each of them ending with Beomgyu, your beloved. You just had to crack through Heeseung first.

It was one of those nights where you had nothing going on in your life. You called Seori, but she was busy getting ready for Yeonjun’s party which well — you were invited to go, but didn’t because you were too lazy to get up and get ready.

So you found yourself here, in the comic store your uncle owned, slurping on some instant noodles and reading the latest version of Fuller House. You weren’t going to lie, you liked it. You were just sitting on the owner's chair with your bowl filled with noodles on the table and other stuff which were related to the store such as records of the borrowed comics. You bopped your head to the song that the little radio beside you played— ‘Candy’ by H.O.T.

The door to the comic store opened as you heard the bell hanging on it ring. Surely you weren’t bothered to look since the scene you were reading was far too interesting and Ryder was far too handsome to take your eyes off him!

“Welcome, please feel free to look around and pick up any of the comics you like. If you’re looking for something specific, let me know.” Although it was supposed to sound enthusiastic, you put in your own twist making it sound like those automated recordings you hear on those phone calls.

You finally looked up to see who the man was when you were going to gobble a mouthful of the tasty ramen you had. You didn’t quite see the face of the mystery man that came to him as he was quick to look at the various comics displayed on the shelves in front of you, making his back face you. 

You saw him pick out a comic book with a cover that you couldn’t quite recognize even if you had registered over thousands of comics here. After squinting your eyes a bit, you realised he picked out ‘Demon Diary’. 

So he’s a nerd.

He turned sideways and to your surprise, it was the devil himself—Lee Heeseung.

“Heeseung?” You said, rather loud.

Due to your shock and his name being yelled in the store, he dropped the comic and looked at you, startled—even going as far as letting out a cuss word.

“Hey man, keep it PG13.” You giggled, seeing his shocked figure, in which he rolled his eyes. “My Uncle’s at the back.”

“What are you doing here?” He asked, still shocked, because you were the last person he wanted to meet right now.

“Me? I work here.” You smirked, “What are you doing here?”

“I mean, I've never seen you rent books from here.” You added on.

“I was…just searching.”

“Right.” You said, smiling. 

Why is this nerd so awkward?

“You dropped the book, you know?” You said, looking at the fallen book on the ground.

“Right, sorry.” He muttered, rushing to keep the book back on the shelf which resulted in more books falling due to his clumsy demeanour. 

“Fuck.” Luckily, he caught them just in time and looked at you with the same cold glare he did earlier, but just a bit more awkward and maybe, embarrassed? 

And just like that he left, rushing out the door. 

He didn’t even say bye. 

How rude. 

From that day onwards, he felt more awkward around you. You just didn’t know why. Everytime it was your turn in the roster to announce the morning announcements in the broadcasting room, he had nothing but an emotionless expression and a thumbs up when recording it while you sat in the studio. The other days felt even weirder as you tried to talk to him, but he was quick to go in the other direction. Your head thinks that he avoided you out of embarrassment, but it still left an uneasy feeling in your stomach.

“He’s just so weird!” You said to your best friend while plopping onto your bed.

She was currently sitting on your vanity with a bunch of makeup brushes spread around the table and countless amounts of eyeshadow palettes opened. Apparently, she was practising to ‘enhance’ her looks to impress her new boytoy—Sunghoon.

One of the players on the football team alongside your Beomgyu.

Seori just hummed along to your rambles about Heeseung. Well she did care, but God how long can a person hear her best friends rant about the same guy for over an hour.

“And you know what he did?” You abruptly said, sitting up from your bed, “He just went! Without even apologising!”

“For what?” Seori asked, looking at you through the reflection in your vanity mirror with furrowed eyebrows.

“For his bitchy attitude.” You just had the urge to roll your eyes to the back of your head with the way Heeseung had been acting.

“Oh, only if I could punch him in the face.” You sighed.

“Just leave it Y/n. And I mean this whole thing. It took you what–so many months for your plan to talk to this Beomgyu boy and now what? All you’ve gotten is nowhere. Just move on, babe.” She said, while leaning into the mirror to apply her mascara. 

“Seori, Beomgyu is not just some boy. And actually, it’s taken me only weeks for this Heeseung plan. He’s just cold. That’s it. Karina said that he takes time to warm up to people so I think if I get past this stage I could really be friends with him.” You justified your plan, which Seori might call you a bit (a lot) delusional for.

“Alright, Y/n.” Seori sighed, “Whatever you say.” She turned around to look at you.

“I’m just saying, be careful.” Seori said, concern laced on her expressions, “Things don't always go the way you want it to. Just go with the flow.” She smiled.

“Wow, when did you take philosophy classes?” You said, having an amazed expression for sarcasm.

She rolled her eyes as she took out her eyeliner on the table, “Now, come here. You know you do my eyeliner the best.” She said, smiling.

You rolled your eyes playfully and stood up to go towards your best friend, taking the eyeliner from her hands and starting to carefully draw lines at the bottom of her eyelid.

Your best friend was practically the opposite of you. While she finds a new man every week, you’ve been hung over the same guy for the past four years. But having her here and listening to all your rants about him and his rude (but cute) best friend is something that you wouldn’t trade for the world.

As tomorrow was the big day for the game, you were determined to win Heeseung’s friendship as a way to Beomgyu’s heart.

Finally, after what felt like forever, the day you anticipated the most arrived. You looked at yourself in the vanity mirror and tightened your slicked back pigtails tired by hair ties with small bows on them. 

You were determined to somehow crack that little arrogant bastard���Mr. Lee Heeseung.

So you packed everything you needed and headed to the stadium which you found out was filled with hundreds of teenagers and teachers patrolling the stadium, looking like they had been tasked with finding the cure to cancer.

Oh was it a sight to see. You could smell the freshly watered grass and hear loud chatters of people conversing with each other—some even yelling. A sweet melody flowed into your eyes through the humongous speakers situated around the stadium. You were going to love today.

You quickly tried to find Seori and lo and behold, there she was, situated in between Sunghoon’s arms as Sunghoon whispered into Seori’s ear and her later laughing like it was the funniest thing that was ever said.

You ran up to them, waving Seori and Sunghoon as well—although you’ve never even spoken to him.

“Ah, my girl is here.” She squealed as she broke free from Sunghoon’s grasp and hugged you tightly.

You awkwardly hugged Seori back, trying to catch your breath from her tight grip while saying hello to Sunghoon who was smiling at the scene.

“You look adorable.” Seori mumbled to your ear, “So adorable that Beomgyu might fall for you the moment he sees you.”

You couldn't help but slap on a big smile after your best friend said that. “You think so?” You asked, touching one of your pigtails in which she nodded in return.

Sunghoon on the other hand was called out by Jake, his friend and teammate, “Babe—I mean, Seori, I have to go. Coach is asking for us to meet at the locker room.”

“Oh right.” Seori giggled as she quickly kissed Sunghoon on the cheek and waved him ‘Goodbye’ after saying that she’ll cheer him on.

Cuties.

Except that could be Beomgyu and you right now, but the universe apparently hated you.

“So, new boyfriend?” You wiggled your eyes at the blushing girl in front of you.

“No!” She exclaimed, “We just, I don’t know.” Seori mumbled.

“Well, if you want him; you need to date him, fast!” You warned Seori, “I just saw him with Wonyoung not long ago. And I don’t know, she looks like she really likes him.” You said.

“What?!” She yelled.

“Don’t worry,” You laughed at her furious, but cute expression, “With the way you kissed him he looks like he’s a goner.”

“Heeseung looks it too.”

“What?” You spaced out.

Why is his name being mentioned?

Suddenly all the emotion in your face drained away, like you couldn’t give two fucks about the boy that had it against you.

“He looked like he was two seconds away from a heart attack when he looked at you.”

“What? You saw him?” You questioned, looking around to find the rude boy.

“Yes, you know the bakesale is like the opposite of where we’re standing right?” She lowered her head asking for confirmation.

“Oh.”

Does he think I’m pretty?

But then you remember what Seori said. The bake sale.

“Oh shit, I have to go.” You abruptly said.

You and Seori parted ways after saying ‘Goodbye’ and you headed to the bakesale with a man standing behind the table of baked goodies.

Heeseung was preparing the goods as he aligned them perfectly, keeping the doughnuts next to the brownies and so on.

You soon caught on and went behind the table to do what he was doing.

“That’s new.” He mumbled.

You were shocked that he even talked to you.

But, hey. At Least he made your plan a bit easier.

“What is?” You asked in confusion.

“Your hair.” He said, not even sparing one look at you and keeping his focus on taking out the baked goods out of the trays next to him.

“Yeah, I tried something different today.” You smiled, thankful that he noticed your hairstyle.

“You look like a dork.” He simply said, as he went away taking the empty trays to wherever he was off to.

That bitch.

So he doesn’t think I’m cute?!

Your mouth was left open as you processed what he said. 

As if he looks good.

Well, he does.

But that’s not the point!

Your eyebrows furrowed as you let out a huff, leaving a pout on your face. You didn’t let his stupid comment affect your whole mood so you just continued with doing your tasks as his words went to the back of your head.

Heeseung and you continued to sell various types of cakes and other baked goods while you took a little bite from one of the chocolate doughnuts that was eyeing you the entire time. And you swore, you could see Heeseung subtly smiling at your cute actions from the corner of your eye. 

Soon after, the bakesale was long forgotten as everyone focused on the game and the star of the team, Choi Beomgyu. He skillfully passed the members of the opposing team with the ball tangled around his feet. The team needed one more goal to win the entire thing and time was not on their side.

Beomgyu had two minutes left on the clock to somehow magically kick the football into the goal. And just before you knew it, the crowd went crazy, screaming for their new champion—Choi Beomgyu.

He successfully saved the entire team by winning in the last moment and you adored the way his proud smile never left his handsome face even once. 

Heeseung beside you was cheering for his best friend when he won. You couldn’t help but smile at his excited expression which was a rare sight to see.  He soon ran to Beomgyu and hugged him as he praised the ace of the team. Soon chants of Beomgyu’s name echoed throughout the stadium.

Ah, were you proud of your future boyfriend. 

Maybe this was your chance. A chance to finally talk to him. Since no one was at the stall as they were all focused on the ace in the middle of the stadium that was sitting on someone's neck as people chanted his name, you thought to bring him a bottle of water. Maybe even compliment his football skills (even if you didn’t know shit about football).

You took an unopened water bottle from one of the boxes and when you looked at the stadium again, the crowd seemed to move. Fuck, you couldn’t lose him!

You started searching as people started to leave the stadium while some were idling around the benches taking pictures with their Fotoman cameras. The crowd was still very much alive, just the reason for it was missing. Could he have disappeared that fast?

You scanned the grounds one last time and at the corner of your eye, you saw a pathway which led to the boys’ locker room. Well, you had to do what you had to do.

So now, you were standing in the middle of the empty boys locker room with a little water bottle in your hand and the desperation pouring through your eyes to find the star of the day. 

But lo and behold, you found his trusty sidekick. And you wanted to laugh, because of the shriek he just let out which led you to think that this was a bit familiar to the situation you were in a few days ago. 

“What the hell are you doing in here? You perv!” He whispered, shouted and looked around and back at you with a glare shooting right at you.

“Hey! I’m not a perv! I was just looking for Beomgyu to give him some water–” But before you could finish your speech, Beomgyu and a group of guys were heard coming into the locker room which obviously you couldn't hear as you were too busy defending yourself.

“What! Hey! What are you doing?” You almost shouted as Heeseung pulled you into one of the showers and covered your mouth with his somewhat sweaty palms. 

And now, it was just you pressed against Heeseung's chest as his hand involuntarily found his way to your waist to create more space in this uncomfortably tiny shower that could clearly fit only one person.

“Who’s the perv now?” You whispered to yourself, looking away from him, but also internally freaking out that he was so close to you.

Maybe if you were some other girl like Minji from fourth period who could not stop rambling on about Heeseung or maybe the lunch lady that always looked at him with a smile and gave him extra chicken, you would be a puddle.

But you’re not, or so you think that way. Yet you couldn’t deny the quickened beats of your heart which you hoped that Heeseung couldn’t hear given that your chest was literally against his. 

You heard Beomgyu outside talking with some other players in his team about the match which made you smile. But you swore that you could see Heeseung rolling his eyes at your expression which honestly you couldn't care less, but to give him a quick punishment, you thought it would be fun to pinch his stomach where your hand was currently pressed against.

Seeing his shushed pained expression and his glare at you only made you smirk even more, but your little feud was quickly sent away as Beomgyu’s ongoing conversation got you distracted. 

“You should’ve seen the girls!” One of the football players said, “God, they were so hot! I almost missed a shot because of them!” He drooled.

Gross.

“Yeah, especially that Seori girl.” The other boy said.

Seori? As in my ‘Yoon Seori’? My best friend?

“Fuck, she was hot.” Beomgyu spoke up.

And at that instant, all the colour on your face drained away. You knew most boys always had a weird way of talking about girls, but you never expected your best friend’s name to be passed around like this, especially by your crush. Your pout only increased when you heard them talk even further and you felt a lump in your throat. This cannot be happening.

“Yeah, but isn’t she with Park Sunghoon? I saw them kissing and shit.” 

“Awh fuck me, I was going to ask her out.” Beomgyu half heartedly laughed at his missed chance.

So he knew who you were—given that you were always with Seori—and he was going to ask her out and not you.

Ouch.

You inhaled slowly, trying to not let your tears fall out as you forgot about the male that was beside you who was watching every expression that came out of your face. 

Heeseung didn’t know why, but he didn’t like seeing your face all sad and mushy. Every time he saw you, you were always giggly or mad at him or trying to put on a fake smile just to get closer to him. But he’s never seen this. And he did not like it, even though he didn’t know why. 

And without thinking, he pulled you closer to him.

Hugging you tight.

You were more shocked than sad as you looked at him. You let out a gasp as he held you tight against his chest and your heart skipped around four or five beats. He wasn’t looking at you though. In fact, he looked at anything else or than you, since all of a sudden, the soap that was lying on the soap dish looked very interesting. 

He looked very, very red––from the tip of his forehead to the bits of his neck that was covered by his t-shirt, he was red. His pointy ears that were peaking out were red, his cheeks were tinted with a rosy colour and you couldn’t miss out on how his adams apple bobbed as he took the biggest gulp ever!

But, why did you like it?

You shouldn’t.

You liked the man who was outside the shower.

Wait, is this his way of trying to comfort me?

That’s actually kinda swee—”Guys! Come outside! Coach wants to take photos!” One of the members that barged into the locker room yelled before all the soccer players scurried away and went outside the room and onto the stadium.

You could finally let out the breath you were holding in. But Heeseung already shoved you aside and threw himself outside the shower. 

You still couldn’t speak of what just happened, but Heeseung was quick to fill in the gap of silence.

“We sold enough stuff today, right?” He said, rubbing his pants against his jeans as he looked anywhere but you.

You blinked out of your dazed zone and looked at the nervous boy, “I think s—”

“Great! Okay, I’ll go and start cleaning up.” He said, as he interrupted you before leaving the room.

What just happened?

You should probably tell Seori.

She deserves to know, right?

“Y/n, what’s that big head of yours thinking?” Seori pouted as she put her arm around your shoulder.

Damn, she saw right through you.

You honestly didn’t know what you were thinking or who you were thinking of. When you paint a picture you see Beomgyu and his pretty locks of hair falling right in front of his eyes, his boyish smile and spark in his eyes

But

Next to him, you saw Heeseung.

Heeseung who has his forehead shown and his stupid locks which parted it, that stupid twinkle in his eyes which you wish you could gauge out and his slight smile forcibly lighting up that spark in you

Now you were stuck, stuck in between two of these boys. You definitely liked Beomgyu! Right? That’s what you keep repeating in your head, but the lines slowly blur as Heeseung’s name enters your head which makes you go into a spiral.

“Y/n?” 

“Hm?” You snap out of your thoughts and look at your best friend with the eyes that resembled a lost bambi. 

“You okay?” She asked, with genuine concern.

“Yeah, sorry.” You laughed it off, “I’m just tired from that soccer match.” 

“Right.” She dragged the word while looking at you suspiciously. 

“I’m fine Seori, I mean you would be too after selling around a hundred cupcakes.” You laughed, trying to change the topic.

But lo and behold, the universe was against you once again because as soon as you finished talking, you saw the boy that you were stuck in the showers with yesterday.

The pace of the students walking through the halls seemed to slow down. Everything else felt blurry except for him, the boy that hugged you tight yesterday. The usual hustle slowly faded into the background, leaving the world feeling slightly out of focus—at least to you. To your surprise, he looked even more handsome than he did yesterday. Wait, was he glowing?! Your mouth was agape as you intently fixed your gaze on him.

“Y/n! Snap out of it!” Your best friend brings your focus back to where you were.

“Huh?” 

Seori’s gaze followed on where your eyes were previously set on and it ended on Heeseung’s stoic face. A series of ‘oh’s left her mouth as she looked at you, wiggling her eyebrows.

“I knew you would move on!” She squealed, locking her arms with yours.

Did you?

“Seori, I think you’re mistaken. I was just–” 

“Don’t lie, Y/n. I know that stare when I see it.” She fixed a teasing smile on her face.

“Seori, there’s nothing going on.”

You couldn’t deny the fact that Her words hit you hard. Have you really moved on from Beomgyu? Just a few seconds ago, you were thinking about him.Yet, you couldn’t seem to shake off the feeling of Heeseung lingering above your thoughts laced with Beomgyu. 

“You can’t deny that you weren't just drooling for Heeseung. Not Beomgyu.” 

You shook your head, trying to clear your thoughts. "I don't know, Seori. It's...complicated."

Her eyebrows furrowed as a sign for you to elaborate, but you debated on whether telling what happened on the day of the soccer match and what you heard from Beomgyu.

“It’s just really complicated.” Was all you could say, “Don’t worry about it!” You forced your lips into a tight smile which in turn Seori let out a sigh and continued walking as you both tried shaking off the conversation you just had. 

Was it really though? You just may find Heeseung a tiny bit attractive after he allegedly hugged you tight in the showers—although not knowing it was intentional, you still very much like Beomgyu who wanted to ask your best friend out! Not that complicated, right? Maybe you found Heeseung a bit cute and maybe not much of a jerk like he showed you to be, especially when he hugged you, revealing he was more than just a cold facade. But what you couldn’t seem to ignore was how your heart flipped seeing his features in the crowd as his bambi eyes shone while his heart shaped lips formed into a pout as he talked with the other students.

Nonetheless, a little touching here and there and a confused bundle of feelings wasn’t going to derail your plan. You were determined to get this to work no matter what. And plus you were very loyal to your man. You think so.

That night, a suffocating silence forcefully clung to the air as Heeseung sat on the dinner table with his parents, the atmosphere always carrying a sense of thick tension whenever his parents were around. He sat next to his brother while his parents were seated across him, boring their eyes onto him with a stern look. With the silence they gave him, Heeseung felt a tight knot into his stomach that felt like it would burst any minute. 

The only sound that could be heard was the spoons and forks clanking against the dinner plates while the fan’s motor could be heard throughout the room. Although the smell of home cooked japchae filled the room, Heeseung hardly touched his food as he just poked his food with his fork. His father broke the awkward silence first,

As the silence of the man sitting in front of him spoke volumes, he was first to break the silence, “Son, how did the maths test you had last week go?” Heeseung’s father inquired while staring at him.

“I got a seventy.” 

Heeseung knew he fucked up. The young boy couldn’t help but shrink under his father’s scrutinising gaze. His cheeks held a hot shade of red as he looked at all the food scattered on his plate. He knew that what was about to come was another lecture from his father’s mouth and small scoldings from his mother as well.

“Seventy? Heeseung what have I told you?” His father’s voice grew stern.

“Honestly, what the absolute hell are you doing with your life? Last time it was an eighty, and I let it slip because maybe you weren’t doing well. But now I think you’re just lazy,” His father scoffed, “Why can’t you be more like your brother? Look, all his scores are above ninety and that’s all I ask from you.” He said, pointing at the younger boy sitting beside Heeseung with his fork.

Heeseung didn’t even bother looking at his brother, knowing all he could return was a guilty and pitiful face. Honestly, why couldn’t he be more like him?

“Stop spending time with those useless cameras of yours and actually focus on your studies!” Heeseung flinched at the sudden rise of voice from his father which he hated to admit that it affected him.

“They’re not just cameras, Dad,” Heeseung mumbled, gulping the dry knot stuck in his throat.

“What was that? Yeah right, as if cameras are going to help you excel in your studies,” He scoffed once again. “Maybe it’s that Beomgyu boy that you hang out so much with. That boy is nothing but a negative influence on you.” He spat.

And that was the first time where he finally looked his father in the eye now as Heeseung finally looked up from his plate and shot back the same nasty glare his father gave him, “Don’t call him that.”

“I see, now he’s more important to you than your own family. So what if I call him that, then what?” He provoked Heeseung.

Heeseung knew if he acted up, the consequences would be worse. He looked at his mother for any sign of help, but all she did was stare into her plate in fear of getting scolded by Heeseung’s father as well. Not being able to handle the situation anymore, Heeseung stood up from the dining table and left the house, not caring about the shouts that came from his father’s mouth.

The only thing that came out of your mouth was quiet snores. You were sleeping again after promising your mother you just needed a five minute nap afterschool which resulted in six hours of sleep, resulting in the time being seven pm now.

The door abruptly opened showing your older brother shouting at you trying to wake you up, “Y/n! Come on! Get up!”

“What the hell! What do you want?” You asked in a groggy voice, your eyes still closed.

“Go buy me some ramen.” He simply said.

If you had the power right now to strangle your brother to death, his soul would be on the stairway to hell right now.

“Fuck off!” You said as you hid yourself under your comfortable sheets.

Your brother in turn grabbed the sheets leaving you cold, “Go right now.” He said while throwing you some notes of money.

“Or what?” You provoked him, your hands rubbing against your arms to keep you warm.

“I’m telling everyone that a certain someone came home from school, crying because they wet their pants in eighth grade.” Your brother said in a sing-songy voice and a cheeky smile.

Your eyes shot open and you looked like you could kill him in five different ways. Because not only was he blackmailing you right now…but it was also in fact true.

Before you could chase him, he ran out the door, closing it shut after yelling what flavour of ramen he wanted.

“Ugh!” You growled at your peaceful sleep being interrupted by your annoying brother and his tasks.

You thought it was now a good time to wash your face and get rid of the way your bed was calling your name and looked more attractive than ever. Rolling your eyes, you wore your favourite red and white striped sweater and grabbed the money from your bed and left the house, flipping your brother on the way out.

You stepped on onto the chilly streets of Seoul and walked through the concrete roads to the nearest seven-eleven you could find. The walk wasn’t that long yet you felt like the sleep was getting to you from the way you felt already exhausted by the five minute walk. 

You walked into the store getting whatever ramen your brother liked and an ice cream for yourself to reward you for the hard work that you did now.

As you licked onto the vanilla flavoured ice cream, you were on your way back home while the chill breeze ran through your legs. Fuck, I shouldn’t have worn shorts.

And now that you think about it, you were only here because of your stupid older brother. With the amount of laziness he had in him, you had a hard time finding accepting the fact that the couch potato that’s probably sleeping in your bed got into a good university and actually has a life.

Oh how you could strangle your brother right now for his lazy bum. Only if you could have one day with him, he’d be scrambled eggs by now. Oh only if you coul— 

“Ouch!” You winced as you suddenly trip onto the ground, bruising your knee. Luckily, your ice cream was still intact, though its liquid melted onto your skin, dripping down your hands.

“The Gods hate me today!” You whined as you looked at your ankle in pain, “My poor knee.”

You looked up to find a place to at least sit so the pain would go off. To your surprise you found a nearby park which you used to visit all the time when you were a kid. You crossed the street and entered the park lit with rusty street lights. 

Wait a minute…

As you walked into the park, you saw a male figure sitting on one of the swings while  his back was hunched. 

That hoodie looks too familiar…

And then it clicked. That hoodie was the one Beomgyu wore when he went on one of the class trips. As much as it was a rare sight to see him attending these class trips instead of skipping them, you vividly remember it because that was one of the few times where you actually talked to him. 

So you slowly went towards the figure, acting like you didn’t know who he was just so you could sit on the swing next to him with the excuse of having hurt your knee.

As you slowly approached the male figure, you could kind of make out his face shape and then you realised that it wasn't Beomgyu at all.

“Heeseung?” 

You saw him flinch at the surprising sound and his eyes shot wide open to look at you, “What the hell? You scared me, woman.” He said, trying to calm down.

Much to your surprise, another one of your failed attempts.

Heeseung looked at the ice cream in one hand that was already melted and the ramen that was in your plastic bag in the other. His gaze then slowly went towards your bleeding knee. 

But you didn’t take his observation to note as you huffed while throwing your already melted ice cream into one of the garbage cans nearby and sitting down on the swing next to him, placing your plastic bag with a ramen packet inside on the ground, wiping your ice cream coated hands onto your sweater.

“What the hell did you do to your knee?” He inquired, a rough tone escaping from his mouth.

“I fell down.” You mumbled as you unconsciously pouted.

“And you’re not going to do anything about it?” He asked, amazed by the fact that you’re not bothered at your literal bleeding knee. 

“I don’t want to walk all the way back to get a stupid band aid.” You sighed, looking down.

Heeseung felt uneasy by the sight of your state where you looked like you gave up. He let out a sigh and probably a curse to what you could hear and got up, “Wait here.” He said as he left the park.

Your eyes looked up at the boy who slowly disappeared into the dark, wondering where he went. But you didn’t care anyways. Maybe Seori was right, you could never be able to get close to Beomgyu. Even the Gods are against it. Your pout came out even more as you thought about it even more. 

As you looked through the park, your childhood memories fluttered open as you remembered the numerous amount of times you played Hide and Seek with Seori or the endless amount of ways you managed to trip on the grass and form a new bruise somewhere where your mother always made a fuss about.

You sighed and glanced at your bleeding knee. You winced at the burning sensation it gave you and the sight of fresh blood splattered on your knee making you cringe as you had a trickling urge to wipe it all off from your sweater, but you knew better than that. You wondered if Heeseung would stick to his words and actually come back 

Just as the thought of the young boy entered your mind, you heard the sound of footsteps approaching you. You looked up to see Heeseung returning, holding a small first aid kit in one hand and a bottle of water in the other. A wave of relief washed over you as you released the breath that you didn’t realise that you had been holding.

Without saying another word, he got down on one knee and opened the first aid kit. He took the small piece of soft cotton and started to clean your wound. Next, he took some antibacterial cream and applied it onto your fresh wound.

A hiss came out of your mouth as your leg jerked away from his touch. He looked up with a stoic expression on his face, “Stay still.” He commanded.

Your pout quickly went away as his hand came into contact with your leg as he tried to hold it for a better grip, his touch being surprisingly gentle. You gulped as you looked away from the sight. He was being too kind for your liking. You were surprised that he didn’t walk away the moment he saw you.

After patching your wound up with a bandaid, he got up, taking the water bottle that was on the ground, and you looked up at him, searching for an answer as to why he did something that was so out of character for him.

“A thank you would be nice,” He scoffed but the confused look made him sort of understand what you were thinking, “I just... hate seeing blood.”

He gave you the water bottle. “You should be more careful, dork.”

You hesitantly took the water bottle from his hand and mumbled a thank you for the water bottle and disinfecting your wound from your clumsy fall earlier while he returned to his empty seat on the swing set. 

It had been a few moments since you both went back to silence and a few gulps from the water bottle Heeseung gave you for you to finally break the silence, “So why are you here?”

You turned your head around to face Heeseung who kept staring at the scenery of the park, “Needed some fresh air.”

“Mm, sometimes I need some too, but I go to the Han River. It’s more peaceful there,” you said, trying to keep the conversation light.

“Yeah, well, do I look like I can go there now?” Heeseung said, his voice sounding snarky and sharper than you expected.

You smiled sheepishly, understanding the given circumstances, “Right, sorry.”

Heeseung sighed, he could see your smile from the corner of his eyes. He looked down to his hands resting on his lap, “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… lash out on you like that.” He mumbled.

“I get it I guess… I guess we all have those days.” You said, turning back to view the comforting landscape in front of you. “I used to be worse. I once smacked my brother across the face because he breathed too loud.”

A snort surprisingly came out of Heeseung’s mouth. “Are you implying that smacking you might help?”

“Well not me! Violence does not help, but if it’s on my brother… then I’d disagree.” You giggled, remembering the memory of your brother sobbing to your mother with a red strike across his face.

A soft smile found its way on Heseung’s face and this was probably the first and few times you actually saw him smile. The problem was, you didn’t know why, but you liked it. A lot. And you wanted to keep doing whatever you could to keep that smile on his face.

Gosh! Get a grip, Y/n!

You both fell into a somewhat comfortable silence before you decided to change the subject again. “When I was a kid, I used to come to this park all the time,” you began speaking, your eyes wandering around the familiar surroundings of your memories spent here. “Seori and I would play hide and seek, and I’d always manage to trip over something and end up with a new bruise. My mom would make such a fuss about it.”

Heeseung intently listened. He found it comforting that he could just sit there and here you talk without finding it annoying. This surprised him, what was he doing? Wasn’t he supposed to hate you?

“Oh right there!” You pointed to one of the bushes, “I fell down on a bird’s nest there. I spent the entire ride home sobbing because I sat on some of the eggs and it.. broke.” You mumbled at the end, feeling embarrassed. “I couldn’t sleep that night so I went back the next day and made a birdhouse for that poor mama bird.” You said, a pout unconsciously showing up at your lips.

Even though you were currently going through your past memories and spilling your countless stories to Heeseung, all you could hear from him was silence. You started to wonder if you were talking too much, if maybe he wanted some peace and quiet. Just as you were about to apologise, your pager beeped loudly, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You glanced at it and realised it was your brother. “Oh, shit. I need to get back,” you said, standing up and wincing at the pain in your knee. You picked up the plastic bag from the ground.

You looked back at Heeseung and awkwardly cleared your throat, wondering if you were on terms to bid each other Goodbye, but before you could form a sentence Heeseung beat you to it, “Open your eyes when you’re walking and don't fall again, dork.”

You playfully rolled your eyes realising he was back to his old Heeseung self and left the park, heading towards your home. As you limped back, you couldn’t help but feel like maybe, just maybe, you’d managed to make him feel a little better.

Heeseung watched you limp out of the park, a soft laugh escaping him at the sight of your awkward struggle. A small smile tugged at his lips as he watched you go. He felt a bit lighter, thanks to you, though he’d never admit that.

Waking up with a bruise was never a good way to start your morning. You took off the thick blanket that covered you. As you felt the dull ache on your knee, the unexpected meetup with Heeseung rushed back to your head when that was the reason why you tossed and turned at night, trying to get a wink of sleep. 

The thought of the boy never left your mind, wondering where you stood with Heeseung, hoping that yesterday may make Heeseung warm up to you, but a part of you wanted Heeseung  to keep you at arms distance for the fear of something you couldn’t quite grasp onto. 

But you settled on keeping Heeseung as a part of your plan and maybe even a friend after you start dating Beomgyu. Right?

Oh right, Beomgyu…

The chestnut haired boy raced back to your mind, strengthening your feelings for him. Though, you still didn’t know why the thought settled weirdly in your stomach. 

You brushed it off and started to get ready for school, you were determined that today would be the day that you get your pawn Heeseung to finally act according to your genius plan. 

After a quick shower and trying to make yourself decent for school, you headed out the door, slightly limping but still excited and a hundred percent sure that he would agree if you buttered up enough to him.

As hours passed, the day was going pretty well while you zoomed through the classes with ease. And now, you found yourself standing in that familiar spot, outside the broadcasting room, a few minutes before the usual meeting would start since you knew that Heeseung was always the first one to be there.

What a loser! 

A kinda cute one too maybe…

Wait! Fuck—

“Y/n?” A voice came from behind you, a familiar one.

“Hee–” You turned around to see the boy towering over you, the gap between you being very close.

You froze after seeing how close he was to you, “I-I was actually going to talk to you– you’re here?”

“Guess you beat me to it.” He said, taking his hand out of his pocket and turning the knob on the door resting next to you, his side view being very clear to you.

Shit.

He opened the door and you silently thanked yourself that you weren't leaning against it and quickly scooted to the side to give him some space to walk through the room. He took his seat at the very end of the room— his usual seat. You walked in slowly, closed the door behind you, and took a seat in the chair across from him.

“I was going to say–”

“Can I ask you something?” He spoke up.

His sudden question caught you off guard, “Ye–yeah go ahead.”

“What exactly are you trying to do?”

You furrowed your eyebrows at his peculiar question, your head tilting to the side in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, why are you trying to be friends with me?”

“Oh.” An odd silence formed between you two. “I just wanted to–”

“You never even looked at me before, so why join the broadcasting club, talk to me, try to get close to me? I just want to know why notice me now?”

You contemplated on saying that it had something to do with a boy named Beomgyu but you swallowed that response down your throat, knowing how’d his future response look like. Your sudden confidence at the beginning of your day faltered, making it shred into tiny little pieces. All you could do was open your mouth a bit and gulp nervously then look down at your hands resting on your lap.

Heeseung noticed your sudden nervous behaviour so all his thoughts came out into one statement, “You like him.”

Your eyes widened and looked straight at him. 

So he knew.

Heeseung only scoffed, the pieces of your plan finally laying out perfectly to him, “And you're trying to get close to me so you can what? Talk to him?” 

All you could do was look down and nod slightly. Was it that obvious?

Another scoff could be heard from Heeseung as he stood up from his chair, clearly not wanting to be near you.

You stood up, “Heeseung, wait!” He stopped in his tracks, yet his back was still facing you.

“I have liked Beomgyu before I could even process what the word like had really meant. And gosh, I tried everything in the book and heck everything I could do to even get close to him. Nothing worked! Please just— this is my last hope as silly as it sounds, but I’m really desperate here. Just help me out a bit, because I don't think I can sleep at night knowing I didn’t try. I swear i’ll even stop talking to you if he rejects me–”

“You talk a lot.” He finally turned around to face you, “But that little monologue of yours got you nowhere.”

You walked towards him, knowing this literally could be your one last shot at this plan. “Heeseung…”

But something struck you as if a bulb just lit up in your head.

Gotcha!

“You know, you’d really hate it if you found out what happened in 'Demon Diary' without reading it, right?” You said, sneakily coming up to him.

“Right..” He said hesitantly, not sure what trick you had up your sleeve.

“If you were to help me, then you’d have the pleasure of reading it without spoilers like Raenef being the next demon lo–” As you were about to finish, his hand came in contact with your mouth to shut you up.

Your eyes widened again and your heart rate fastened for nth time. He was so close to you, his hand feeling warm against your skin. Nothing was to be heard from the both of you until Heeseung realised how close you both were which made him gulp, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down.

He slowly lowered his hand and took it off your mouth, “I want volume one.”

“Deal.”

One thing you've known about Heeseung was that he loved working with cameras. From school events to casual hangouts, he always had his camera hanging around his neck, clicking a picture of anything that piqued his interest. 

So of course, he was assigned by the broadcasting club to take the pictures of students on this field trip to see the flowers at the Musimcheon Cherry Blossom Festival and sent the new girl—aka you—to assist him, which you happily obliged. 

On the way to the field while you were in the bus, you took out your essentials to hopefully butter him up; banana milk. It always does the trick when you want something, and to your luck it was his favourite drink too!

“Woah! Is that for me?” Seori who was seated next to you pouted, trying to take the banana milk out of your hand, but you were quick to swat her hand away.

“No! It’s for Heeseung.” You mumbled with a pout.

“Oh! I get it now.” She wiggled her eyebrows at you in a teasing manner not knowing you wanted to rip them out.

“Stop! It’s not like that,” You said with furrowed eyebrows trying to defend yourself, “It’s so I can kiss ass and get close with Beomgyu!”

“No way L/n Y/n just said that.” She said with a breathy laugh. 

“You gotta do what you gotta do.” You said, stretching your arms a bit with a smile on your face.

Seori rolled her eyes at your justification, “Oh by the way, you still with your boy toy?” You snickered while elbowing Seori.

“He’s not my boy toy! It’s just complicated.” She muttered, shyly.

“Hmm, isn’t that what you said for Jaeyun, Minhyun, Sojun and—”

“Oh my gosh stop! You’re making me look like a player!” She whined, hitting you on the side, “I’m actually serious about Sunghoon, I really like him.” 

“Woah!” You turned to the side. “That I never heard, I’m impressed he managed to wrap you around his finger like that.” You said, nodding your head, impressed by how in love she looked but you’d never say it out loud since you knew she’d drag you to the pits of hell.

Seori never really liked relationships—heck! you’re surprised that she’s been your best friend for this long. She usually has casual and lowkey situationships as you like to call it, but seeing her with Sunghoon actually gave you hope that you might experience her having her first real boyfriend instead of her running away from her potential love interests. 

“Yeah whatever.” She rolled her eyes at your comment. “At Least I’m not the girl that’s been crushing on a guy for three years and hasn't made a move yet!”

“Hey! I am making one! It’s just a really slow move.” You tried to defend yourself.

Hopefully that move does work if Heeseung actually abides by your plan. So when you arrived there, the first thing you did was to search for Heeseung. Luckily, it didn’t take that much time as you found him in the middle of the field setting up the essential equipment needed for capturing some moments on the trip. You headed towards him, calling out his name making his bambi eyes drift towards you.

As you were near him, you reached out to your school bag and took out the comic he had set his eyes on, “You need to return it on Monday.

He silently thanked you while he nodded while you were still rummaging in your bag, “Here.”

You handed out a tiny bottle of banana milk to him, “Jungwon said you liked it, so.”

Heeseung blinked in surprise before he pursed his lips. He took the milk into his hand and turned around to put the comic and the milk into his bag, hiding his smile at the cute gesture from you.

The boy cleared his throat and started adjusting the settings for the camera while you rested your hand against the stand, your chin leaning on top of it, pouting in search for Beomgyu.

Once your eyes finally set on him talking to his friends, your eyes became a lot more dreamy and your once faltered feelings bounced back, strong as ever. 

“No girlfriend, right?” You muttered, still looking at Beomgyu.

“No.”

“Then what type of girls?”

“I don’t know, maybe Sim Eunha?” Heeseung answered, now recording bits of students socialising.

“Oh, so like someone innocent?” You said, taking out a notebook from your bag to record his likes, “That’s alright.”

“Favourite movie?”

“Armageddon.”

“Oh?” You smiled while writing it down, “Mine too.”

“Future major in college?” 

“Theatre and film of journalism and broadcasting.”

“Oh,” You wrote down the words he said quickly, “So he wants to be famous because he’s handsome?” You mumbled.

“No,” Heeseung stated, “I just like working with cameras.”

Wait a minute.

You looked up from your small notebook and processed his words. Is he really talking about himself? Your head shot towards the taller boy next to you with furrowed eyebrows. 

“What?” You exclaimed, “This isn't about you! I’m asking about Beomgyu.” You said as you slightly hit his arm which made him wince a bit. “If I have to get close to him, I need to know what he likes…And besides, why would I ask what you like anyways.”

“Such a dork.” Heeseung scoffed as he looked at your sulky face, “Come here, Soobin sent us both on this trip. You should record as well!” 

You rolled your eyes at the sight of Heeseung setting up his camera on the stand for more stability. You reluctantly but quickly put your pencil and your little notebook in the small pocket of your bag. His eyes averted to you as a signal to come closer which you obliged to.

“Put your eye here,” He pointed at the camera, guiding you to the camera’s viewfinder. “This is the zoom in button and here’s zoom out.” He showed you the necessary buttons needed, “Don't zoom in too much.” He nagged quietly. 

Heeseung slowly guided your hand to the zoom in button and slid it down to the zoom out button. His way of teaching you around his camera felt gentle and soothing, like you could listen to him talk about his cameras all day. His gentle touch and the proximity between you two made your heart feel like it was in a marathon. 

“Hit record.” He instructed and so you did.

You zoomed in on a few places with students chattering and at the scenery of the field and as well as the sky. 

“Hm, you’re doing surprisingly well.” He said, quietly. Way to ruin the moment if there even was one.

You froze at how close you two were where you could hear his heartbeat. It felt so comforting for some reason. You could listen to his deep breaths next to you as he guided you to record some of the scenery. But this also set off many alarms in your head, screaming at you.

What are you doing!?

Your breathing felt unsteady and awfully loud to you, to the point where you thought Heeseung could hear you.

“Okay I got it.” You muttered, trying to dominate the space you two shared behind the camera, “You can go.” You said, nagging him to leave you alone. 

He slowly backed away from you, taken aback from your words and let out a sigh which went unnoticed by you. You continued with recording the landscape which brought a sense of calmness to you. You zoomed into Seori and Sunghoon chatting away, her eyes lighting up at the sight of the cheery boy in front of him. 

Cute, you thought. 

You slowly panned your camera to the blue skies above the fields and now to the chestnut haired boy. Beomgyu’s smile melted your heart as he talked to some of his friends which seemed really funny with the way he laughed. 

He was soon joined by the taller boy, Heeseung. You zoomed in on Beomgyu to get a close-up of him, momentarily forgetting about recording the scenery. Yet, strange enough your hands instinctively moved the camera over to capture the boy next to him. There was something about Heeseung that you couldn’t quite grasp onto. His doe-like eyes sparkled as he chatted with his friends. 

With his hair that always seemed to fall so carelessly over his forehead and the way he would sneer slightly as if he was amused whenever someone spoke up, you could never seem to keep your eyes directed elsewhere and you didn’t really know why. He had this charm about him that was impossible for you to not look twice— the way his lips moved to the glint in his eyes.

After a brief pause, he looked right at the camera, catching your gaze. It startled you, and you fumbled with the camera— readjusting the camera and propping it back to the field quickly. 

Way to make it so not obvious.

However what you didn’t catch was Heeseung looking at your clumsy self, trying to grab shots here and there. And what you didn't see was the smile that found its way to his face, because of you.

If you were Heeseung, where would you be right now? Currently, you were looking for wherever Heeseung would be. In the broadcasting room? Surprisingly, no. One of his classes? No. The cafeteria? No sight of the tall boy. Heck! Even the field where Beomgyu was practising? All you could find was the dashing boy moving through the field with ease and shooting a goal into the net.

The banana milk in your hand started to look real good after your countless laps making you thirsty, but no! You were saving that for Heeseung, if he even is alive today. Suddenly, like lightning struck your head, you realised that Heeseung was a huuuge nerd. 

You jogged to where your school library would be, which was a few metres away from the football field. You entered the facility to see Heeseung in all his glory sitting at one of the tables reading the big book of the Photographers Guide. 

Of Course he’d be here!

Nerd.

His eyebrows were furrowed in concentration, looking like he absorbed every word and the sight made you smile unknowingly. Without thinking, you walked over and took a seat in front of him.

“Whatchu reading?” you asked, dragging your words a bit, leaning in.

Heeseung let out a small yell as he flinched at the sound of you speaking which made your smile grow even wider, “Jesus, woman! stop sneaking up on me like that.” You laughed, brushing it off with a small sorry.

“Why are you here anyways?” He questioned, “You don’t read.”

“Woah!” You raised your hands a bit at the somewhat correct accusation, “I do, sometimes.” You giggled. “I came to give you this.” You placed the banana milk you were holding on the table.

He raised his eyebrow at you, “In exchange for?”

“For nothing! Just a friendly gesture,” you said, but then a sly smile crept up your face. “Actually, I was thinking...maybe we could all hang out together? You, me, and Beomgyu.”

Well he knew it.

“Hell no,” He said, stuffing his nose back into the big book.

“Cmon!” You nagged, your hand reaching for his arm trying to convince him.

Heeseung looked you dead in the eye to say the word ‘no’ again to which you groaned at. 

But then, you noticed a familiar book peeking out of Heeseung’s shoulder bag that was resting on the table. It was volume one of Demon Diary.

“Aha!” Without thinking, you snatched it up.

Heeseung shot up looking at you with widened eyes,”Hey! Give it back.” He protested. 

“I agreed to give this to you if you were to help.” You said, dangling the book infront of him. “And you’re not, so i’ll give this if you—”

“Fine.” He snatched the book from your hand. 

You flashed him a big grin, “Great! I’ll see you at three o'clock at the bus stop tomorrow.”

Heeseung nodded reluctantly as if he was being held at gunpoint!  “Fine. But if this turns out to be a disaster, I’m blaming you.”

“That’s fine,” you said, grinning from ear to ear. “But it won't be.” 

As you left the library, the reality of your plan started to sink in, filling you with a nervous excitement. To think that tomorrow would be the day that you would actually hang out with Beomgyu in the flesh just brought hundreds of butterflies into your stomach. But a part of you wondered if this was the right direction you were going. But as your plan finally starts to take shape, you think to yourself if this is what you really want? You look back at Heeseung being engrossed in his little book. You wondered if maybe, just maybe, he was looking forward to it too.

But, why do you care? You were here for Beomgyu, right? You are doing this for Beomgyu, you tell yourself. But even as you tried to convince yourself, the nagging thought that was right behind you kept pouring thoughts that maybe, just maybe, there was more to this than you first realised. 

The next day arrived in a blink. You were already waiting at the bus stop, dusting off the invisible specs over your dress. Your first real dress that you begged Seori to let you borrow. The baby blue chequered dress draped right above your knees and was held with two straps that rested on your shoulders which were tied into the shape of a bow. 

You looked over at your watch —2:55. You just hoped that Heeseung would show up after praying to the Gods that this plan would finally take off. 

The time stretched on. It took a few minutes to make your stomach start grumbling due to the nervousness that ran through your body, but everything was put aside when you saw Heeseung walking towards you clad in his white tee paired with cargo pants, his hands shoved in his pockets and a stoic expression covering his face. 

Next to him was a slightly shorter boy, but also the man of your dreams and the man that was actually in your dream last night as well. Imagining him so many times in front of you, this close felt overwhelming now that he was actually walking towards you. Not anyone else—you.

Heeseung and Beomgyu stopped in front of you and Beomgyu greeted you with a grin on his face, contrasting to the boy next to him, “Hi Y/n! It’s been a long time since we talked. Hope you won’t mind me tagging along.” He chuckled.

What? Tagging along?

What exactly did Heeseung tell him?

As Beomgyu walked further ahead of you two, you slowed down your pace to match Heeseung as you elbowed him and aggressively whispered, “What did you tell Beomgyu to get him to come?”

Heeseung glanced at you, with that still same stoic look on his face and shrugged. “He loves carnivals. I barely got to finish what I was saying before he was begging to tag along.” 

“Must be fate that we both loooove carnivals so much.” You said, giggling at the thought of you and Beomgyu sharing the same love for roller coasters and cotton candy, missing the roll in Heeseung’s eyes. 

The three of you finally got onto the bus, you going right after Beomgyu, excited for the trip to the carnival. As you neared one of the seats, the bus suddenly lurched forward, causing you to stumble and fall on your ass right in front of Beomgyu.

But lucky for you, Heeseung was right behind, you pressed against his chest. His hand quickly came into contact with your arm, his grip strong as ever. You looked over to see him just as shocked as you are, but the look in his eyes exuded a genuine concern. Before you could fully register what had just happened, he pushed you away from him while wearing that same stern look on his face.

“Thanks," you mumbled, avoiding his gaze as you felt heat rising to your cheeks.

Then he finally looked at you, “Sit.”

You quickly obeyed, sitting on one of the seats that was next to Beomgyu who quickly asked if you were okay after seeing you stumble. You replied saying you were fine and breathed out the breath that you didn't know you were holding in.

You looked at Beomgyu once again, who was blissfully unaware of the little moment you just had with Heeseung, if you could even call it that. You turned your head to look at Heeseung who was standing beside you, one hand gripping the rail above for support while his eyes were fixed onto the passing scenery outside the window. 

You could feel the warmth of him radiating beside you and it strangely brought comfort to you. Even if he wasn’t touching you anymore, even if he was looking ahead of you, eyes stuck to the scenery outside one of the windows. It made you feel an unfamiliar emotion which you never experienced. And you wondered why it only happened whenever you saw Heeseung.

Beomgyu on the other hand was mindlessly babbling about the different types of rides he wanted to go and how he hadn’t been to an amusement park in years. You nodded along to his words, trying to focus on his mindless chatter about the terrifying but exciting roller coasters they have, but your mind kept running back to how Heeseung’s hand felt on your arm, how you were pressed against his chest and that look that he had in his eyes.

That stupid look.

It only happened whenever he locked eyes with you. You honestly wondered if he had sprinkled something over his eyes to make him look at you like that. But you’d be lying if you said you didn’t like it. With recurring encounters revolving around both of you, you started to lean into that look, almost wanting him to look over you with his bambi like doe eyes. 

But, you were sure that would change today. You were going to stick with Beomgyu. The bus came to a stop at the amusement park, dropping you three off. The sight of the crowded park and the sound of excited chatter alone filled the air, clearing your previous thoughts. 

You could practically hear Beomgyu’s excitement. You found yourself smiling along at him, heading towards the park as he pointed to the different rides and the various games they had. And on your other side was the walking grey cloud who had a bored look on his face the entire time. Well usually that wouldn’t bother you, but something was pulling you to walk around and try every game with him. Not the other. 

Fuck, you couldn’t get distracted. 

“We should go on the rollercoaster!” Beomgyu pointed with a big grin plastered on his face.

You nodded along although Heeseung wasn’t having the same reaction, “You guys go ahead, I’ll just walk around.”

“C'mon! It’d be fun! Don’t be such a pussy!” Beomgyu exclaimed, coming near him, his hand dragging Heeseung’s as a motion to join.

“Yeah.. you should come.” You said this time, with a genuine smile, looking forward to seeing how this scaredy cat—due to his previous shrieks from you creeping up on him—would handle roller coasters.

To absolutely no one’s surprise, he was screaming the entire time on the rollercoaster, barely making it out alive and cursing Beomgyu for wanting a second round. You couldn't help but laugh at his state while he was panting for air, his hands on his knees after getting off the “wretched” ride as he liked to call it.

You three would go onto ride the carousel and eat a month’s supply of cotton candy. You couldn’t resist dragging Heeseung onto the Disco Bang ride, laughing as he was tossed around in the spinning machine. 

Your hands naturally found your way to Heeseung’s, dragging him to any of the games to your liking, him just obliging and tagging along. You made him play the claw machine game a dozen times for a hello kitty doll and he would, skillfully manoeuvring the handles to get the cute plushie. He didn’t know why, but he did it so he could see that the doll would perfectly fall into your arms. 

Beomgyu was far gone into the fun of the carnival, drunk on adrenaline which made him ride the rollercoaster again, twice. And at the end of the day, he had to meet the consequences of his previous decision, making his feet stumble on itself and his head dizzy. 

By the time you finished circling around the entire amusement park, the sun had already begun to set. The sky was painted in shades of orange fading into pink, the stars already visible. 

And there was one more ride that you didn’t check out. The biggest part of the plan. You saved the ferris wheel for the last so you could hop on into one of the tiny cabins and sit next to Beomgyu as you both watched the fireworks begin. 

A solid set plan right? 

“Let’s check out the Ferris wheel,” you suggested, pointing to the towering structure dazzled with colourful lights.

“Uh..sure!” Beomgyu hesitantly said while rubbing his tummy, his face a bit pale.

You smiled and got into line side by side with Beomgyu and Heeseung knew that was his cue to let you two have your “moment” as you like to call it. Heeseung joined the cue later so he could go alone, his tall figure a few metres away from you. Beomgyu was too worried about his stomach grumbling to wonder why Heeseung didn’t join you both. 

As you got to the cabin, Beomgyu laid his hand on your shoulder, “I think I’m gonna be sick…"

“Beomgyu, you good?” You asked, worry creeping into your voice as you glanced between him and Heeseung, who looked equally as concerned.

“Yeah, go ahead with Heeseung.” He said, quickly leaving the line to find the nearest bathroom so he could hurl his guts out. 

Fuck.

No, no, no.

This wasn’t supposed to go this way.

The line attendant had already called out to you two, so you had to hurry inside the tiny cabin with Heeseung. You swallowed the little bump in your throat, bummed that you didn’t get to sit with Beomgyu.

You got Heeseung instead.

You plopped onto the seat, Heeseung sitting in front of you. Your eyes visibly looked sad, and Heeseung had that familiar feeling rushing all over again. The last he felt this was at the locker, the same look shadowed your eyes again. 

But, he couldn’t say anything. He just had to sit there and look at your pretty face with a pout on your lips. 

Finally, as the cabins were about to start spinning in circles, he broke the silence, “You okay?”

You scrunched up the ends of your dress, nodding as you looked at the way the fabric bundled up in your hands. 

“Are you sure?” He asked, with a softer tone, “I’m sorry that Beomgyu couldn’t join you.”

“It's..fine.” You looked outside the window to embrace the calm scenery.

Heeseung just sighed and followed your gaze out the window, occasionally looking at you, that same look on your face.

“Do you think Beomgyu liked this?” You mindlessly asked, feeling disappointment was over you.

“Yeah, I think.” Heeseung quietly answered. “ He just got ahead of himself.”

“Today was supposed to be perfect, Beomgyu was supposed to actually like me today.” You confessed, your words tumbling over you as your disappointment grew. “I was supposed to watch the fireworks with him on the ferris wheel, but now he’s puking his guts out probably cursing me for planning this and I dragged you into this—-“

Hey, hey… you did good today.” Heeseung’s words rushed to comfort you, his heart aching as he heard your breathing quickening.

“He genuinely looked like he had fun with you and trust me I know how he looks when he has fun and this was one of the few times he actually smiled that much around anyone. If you ask me, I think he… likes you plenty.”

Heeseung didn’t know why, but he hated saying those last few words. The boy had to spend the entire day at the park looking at Beomgyu gleam over you with such sincerity in his eyes as you smiled with him, riding fucking automated horses that went around in a circle and to say that he likes you was the perfect cherry on top.

“Thank you, Seung.”

Seung.

That was the first time you ever called him by a nickname. It had always been "Heeseung," usually accompanied by some kind of teasing or nagging. So don’t blame his heart for skipping a beat when you sat there all pretty calling him a name which made his mind dizzy.

“The fireworks are starting.” You said, a soft smile rested on your face as you looked to the view outside your window which Heeseung shortly followed after.

And as if on cue, just as the ferris wheel stopped with you both on top, the first set of fireworks had exploded into the sky. It filled the dark night with colour while your eyes lingered over the lit patches of collie, mesmerised by its beauty. 

“It’s so pretty.” You muttered, your voice filled with awe.

Heeseung didn’t respond right away. Why? He was too busy looking at you. It felt more worthwhile than watching a few fireworks light up the night sky. It was more worth it to see how your eyes lit up at the sight. How your eyes widened in shock of the scenery ahead of you.

You looked pretty.

“So pretty.” He muttered, almost in a whisper where only he and his gear could hear it.

Time seemed to stop. The only thing in motion was the continuous fireworks bursting and Heeseung didn’t want it to end. He realised then and there that he would burst up as many fireworks just to see that smile on your face. He realised that he’d do anything to see you happy.

That night, while he sat with you on top of the ferris wheel to watch the fireworks, Heeseung realised something deeper than he was ready to admit— yet something he couldn’t ignore, at least not anymore.

You don’t remember much about the end of yesterday. The fireworks felt like the only thing that was running in your mind. And Heeseung? You don’t seem to remember much about him in the ferris wheel—kept saying the fireworks were pretty or something? 

Nevertheless, you were a hundred percent sure that your plan yesterday had worked. Although there may have been a few minor setbacks (Beomgyu hurling his guts out), you were pretty confident that Beomgyu might see you as his future girlfriend.

That’s why you sprang out of bed, determined to commence phase two of your plan.

Movie date with Choi Beomgyu.

Featuring the infamous Lee Heeseung sitting two rows away from you both.

Considering that today was the last day of school, you knew it was your final chance to get closer to Beomgyu. As you walked down the hallway together with Seori, you had your mandatory debriefing with her about the events that happened last night, reminiscing every sweet moment with Beomgyu.

“Oh my gosh!” Seori squealed, “You two are so cute together!”

You nodded your head, feeling proud about it. “ You finally talked to a real boy! I thought this day would never come!” Seori dramatically exclaimed, making your eyes roll as she clung onto your arms in excitement.

And as if on cue, Beomgyu came into view, stepping out of a classroom. To your surprise, he actually looked at you and waved.

He actually waved!

Trying to stay composed, you waved back with a soft smile, watching as he walked away. Seori in turn looked the most excited she’s ever been, squeezing your arm hard.

“He so wants you!” She said, playfully.

You bit your lip, trying to contain that flutter in your chest. “Hopefully.” You replied in a mutter, still slightly dazed.

But deep inside you, that flutter didn’t have that same kick to it. It almost felt unfamiliar. As if it was fading away, slowly slipping through your fingers.You weren’t sure why, but the thought of Beomgyu liking you didn’t bring as much joy as it did before.

What fueled you to continue was the pure determination that coursed through your veins. With that resolve, you left to go meet your matchmaker, Heeseung.

Which is how you found yourself in front of the broadcasting room again, later that day. You opened the door to see Heeseung there fiddling with some of the equipment.

“Hey Seung.” He turned around to see you heading towards him, his eyes softening a bit at the sight of you.

“Hey.” He quietly said, going back to adjusting some equipment.

“Why the long face?” You pouted, taking a seat next to him.

Well he would look like he was struck by lightning if you called him “seung” though that pretty mouth of yours, ever so softly. If only you knew how his heart was running miles when you said it so softly, making him melt at the sound of his name coming from your lips. 

“Nothing.” He brushed it off.

“Hmm, you could tell me if something is bothering you.” You said, with sincerity. “Did I do something wrong?” You asked as you put your chin onto your hand, looking up at him with your doe eyes.

God, he was a goner.

“You’re fine, dork.” He finally smiled at you, ruffling your hair and going back to whatever he was working on.

You froze at the warmth in his gaze, but pushed the feeling aside. “Well in that case, do you wanna watch a movie with me?” You smiled, with hope in your eyes.

“You mean, me third-wheeling you and Beomgyu?” He rolled his eyes.

“Well, you are supposed to help me.” You huffed, making a point.

Heeseung glanced back at you once again seeing that pout on your face which made him sigh, “Fine, whatever.”

You squealed in excitement, hugging his arm as you were thrilled to hear his answer. 

The day passed on quickly, and before you knew it, it was already seven o’clock and you were already waiting for Heeseung and Beomgyu outside the familiar bus stop again.

But this time, Heeseung came with the absence of Beomgyu. You wondered if he was coming later than expected or…if he wasn’t coming at all. The thought alone made you gulp.

“Where’s Beomgyu?” You looked behind Heeseung, desperate to see if he even was behind the tall figure.

“He did not take that rollercoaster ride well, long story short; he fell sick.” Heeseung dropped the devastating news.

You huffed in annoyance, “Is he okay? I saw him at school today.” You asked, voicing your sincerity.

“Yeah, he is. He took half a day.” Heeseung said, shoving his hands in his pocket, “Just needs rest.”

If it only wasn’t for Beomgyu’s weak immunity, you’d both be smooching in Hawaii! (or watching the movie, you could work with either.)

“Well, what are we going to do now! I already paid.” You pouted, crossing your arms in frustration. 

Heeseung could only softly smile at your frustrated self. Just then, the bus arrived, and you looked at Heeseung, pursing your lips. 

You grabbed his hand before heading inside the bus, “What are you doing?” Heeseung asked with startled eyes.

“I’m not wasting my money.” You muttered, as you sat on one of the seats in the bus while Heeseung scoffed at your response.

You and Heeseung ended up at your local cinema, watching the re-release of fucking Top Gun, a choice made because you thought Beomgyu would like it. On the other hand, Heeseung was having the time of his life, completely immersed in the world of guns and whatnot. 

Pfft. Typical Nerd.

But you’d be lying if you didn’t think he was cute whenever he slightly flinched at the explosions on the screen. Not that cute though. Maybe… kinda… you weren’t sure!

You were just frustrated about not being seated next to Beomgyu. Instead it was just Heeseung sitting next to you. But a part of you didn’t mind, in fact it brought a small smile to your face. 

You shuffled in your seat trying to shake off the uneasy feeling you got in your stomach whenever you thought about Heeseung. 

Well you never felt like this in your whole seventeen years of living, and you sure didn’t feel like this with Beomgyu. It felt almost comforting with Heeseung. You both didn’t have to fill the silence every time, you could just feel at ease with each other’s presence. With Beomgyu, there were always butterflies roaming through your stomach, but with Heeseung you felt like you didn’t have to try to impress yourself, just you being there felt enough. 

And a part of you didn’t care that you were sitting next to Heeseung watching this God awful movie, occasionally grazing hands whenever both of you reached into the popcorn bucket. But thank God that the movie ended because you couldn’t take another second of guns and explosions.

You both made your way out of the theatre in silence, though you couldn’t stop thinking about comparing your all time love with Heeseung. You were so immersed that you didn’t even notice the uneven sidewalk to the nearing bus station until it was too late. Well you did stumble, but before you could hit the ground, Heeseung caught you just in time again.

God, you’ve got to stop falling!

“When will you open your eyes?” Heeseung remarked with sarcasm and he let go.

You didn’t register the stupid remark Heeseung had said, as the pain in your ankle started becoming impossible to ignore. You looked down to realise that you probably strained your ankle.

“Ouch.” You winched at the pain, as you rubbed your leg.

“Are you okay?” Heeseung crouched down to get a better look.

“I don’t know, I think I strained it.” Heeseung only sighed at your answer.

He shaked his head slightly, facing away from you as he was crouching so you could climb onto his back, “Come on, get on.”

“What? Heeseung, I can walk.” You said, though you definitely could not. But you weren’t getting on his back after your little thought session at the movies.

But your protests were a waste because before you knew it, you were on his back, holding onto his shoulders as he carried you.

“You’re lighter than I thought.” Heeseung teased, keeping his tone light.

You hit his back lightly as you retorted, “I’m not that light.” Though a small reluctantly found its way to your face.

Heeseung walked towards the bus station, while you rested your head on his shoulder, kicking your legs in a trace of rhythm while occasionally talking with Heeseung, though most of it was Heeseung humming along to whatever mindless thoughts you voiced. 

It almost felt like you knew him for most of your life. It felt so soothing with him, his little teases making you whine. His way of looking at you like you were the most fragile thing on earth. His way of making you smile whenever you felt sad. 

It felt like he was the one. 

But he isn’t.

Beomgyu is.

That’s what you kept telling yourself as Heeseung slowly crept up your heart. What you didn’t know was that Heeseung felt the same. Almost like two idiots in denial. Typical.

Once you got onto the train, you sat side by side in silence, the gentle ride on the bus with occasional bumps lulled you into a peaceful state. You pulled out your headphones and handed one to Heeseung, “Here.”

The soft melody of “스물다섯, 스물하나 “ by JAURIM flowed into your eyes, making this moment feel like a scene from a movie. Without realising, you leaned your head on his shoulder, the day’s events catching up to you. And before you knew it, you drifted off into a long sleep. 

Heeseung glanced down at you, a small smile played on his lips as he watched. He couldn't help but think how adorable you looked even if you were doing almost as nothing as sleeping against him. The wind from the open window made a few strands of hair fall onto your face, he gently grazed your face, tucking them behind your ear. 

And the moment you shifted closer to him in your sleep, he knew he was done for.

Time passed quickly. It was already December. As the end of the school year approached, with graduation just around the corner, the broadcasting club decided to put in their two cents in the yearbook signing party. And Soobin thought a photo booth would be the perfect inclusion for it, so students could take a picture with their friends one last time. 

And naturally, you and Heeseung were assigned to watch over the photobooth while the other members were assigned to different parts of the party such as the memory lane. You were manning the table with Heeseung while Seori and Sunghoon came over to your stand.

“Seori! You came!” You squealed at the sight of your best friend hand in hand with Sunghoon. “Hi Sunghoon.”

He waved at you with a smile, “We wanted to get a few pictures before it gets too crowded. Plus I had to drag him here.” Seori said, giving you the needed money.

“Yeah, she wouldn’t take no for an answer.” He teased Seori, gently ruffling her hair as she whined. 

Seori slightly nudged Sunghoon before fixing her hair for the pictures. You and Heeseung could only chuckle at their playful banter. 

“Right away, lovebirds.” You snickered with Heeseung at the sight of the two while Seori glared at you, mouthing ‘says you’ while eyeing Heeseung as well.

Uncalled for…

Seori pulled in Sunghoon in the booth, Sunghoon taking the initiative to pull her onto his lap as she giggled. They shared cute and goofy pictures with Seori giving Sunghoon a kiss on the cheek at the end. 

“They’re cute.” You mumbled to Heeseung.

“I guess.” Heeseung smiled with you, glancing at you occasionally.

After Seori and Sunghoon left, time went faster as the crowd started to fill up the Gym. The line for the photo booth became longer. Seori decided to join your table for a while to cure her boredom while Sunghoon played with his friends in the court. Just in time, Beomgyu showed up, revealing who was next in line.

And before you knew it, you were squished in the photo booth with Beomgyu on one end and Heeseung at the other, Seori taking up the remaining space at the far end. “Move over!” Beomgyu giggled while pushing you more against Heeseung. Instinctively, Heeseung wrapped his arm around you, his hand brushing against your waist as he pulled you in. 

A mix of nervousness and excitement rushed over you, as the same familiar warmth settled in your stomach. It wasn’t because of the tight space but because of how close Heeseung was to you. The warmth of his hand against your waist sent shivers down your spine.

The camera's flash went off a few times, capturing the moments with you four. Beomgyu had put on whatever goofy face he could come up with and Seori had her signature peace sign up while a small smile rested on Heeseung’s face. 

As the evening wore on, the crowd started to disappear. Students gathered their belongings, bidding each other goodbye. A strange sense of nostalgia washed over you, feeling emotional that this could be the last time you’d be talking with these students. Karina, Jungwon, and Rei had bid you goodbye as they left after taking down the memory lane they had set up. 

Taehyun and Lia had come in later as they were busy with student body council stuff, but wished you and Heeseung both a quick goodbye before they left as well. And before you knew it, it was only you and Heeseung with a few other students roaming around the Gym. You glanced at Heeseung who was organising the leftover photostrips, carefully putting them into one of the brown boxes beside him. 

A small smile played on your lips, “You wanna take some pictures? Just us two.” 

Heeseung looked up at you with his bambi eyes, a smile on his face. “Sure.” He agreed.

The two of you slipped inside the photo booth, and all of a sudden the air felt different. The atmosphere hung something heavy, waiting to be acknowledged. You sat fairly close together, trying to settle in. 

Heeseung started the timer and sat back down with a smile. You barely had time to think before the first flash went off catching you off guard. This made you laugh, along with Heeseung. The other flashes were followed by playful poses, you placing a peace sign behind Heeseung’s head and Heeseung pinching your cheeks.

Before the last flash went off, you felt a shift in the atmosphere. That feeling started becoming impossible to ignore. Heeseung turned to look at you just as you turned towards you. Your eyes met. Suddenly everything around you was a blur. It was just Heeseung in focus. The boy who months ago got on your nerves. The silent chatter outside became white noise for you. 

Heeseung’s gaze softened, your eyes never left him. The final flash went off going unnoticed. Before you even processed what was going on, he leaned in. HIs lips gently brushing against yours, your eyes instinctively closing. 

It felt soft, careful, yet why did your heart feel like it was going to leap out of your chest. His hands grazed your cheek pulling you closer as you reciprocated the kiss, earning him to pull even closer. It felt so raw yet so gentle. The kiss lasted a few seconds, yet it felt like an eternity. You were so far gone. You don’t seem to remember anything. 

When you finally pulled away, you both looked at each other, out of breath as you were stunned in silence.

Just then, you heard someone’s voice from outside. “Heeseung?” It was Soobin, his voice laced in urgency. 

Heeseung blinked out of his daze, pulling himself outside the photobooth after opening the curtain that divided the photobooth from the outside. “I–I’m here!” He called out, his voice shaken up. 

“Can you help me carry these boxes to the storage room? Miss Lee wants them gone by now.” He huffed, handing one of the boxes to Heeseung.

Heeseung glanced back at you, sitting in the photo booth still shaken up by that stunt Heeseung pulled. He only gulped and looked back at Soobin. “Yeah sure.” Though he didn’t have another choice as Soobin already shoved the box in his face.

“Thanks dude.” Soobin smiled and headed out the Gym with Heeseung. Heeseung looked back at you one last time before exiting the Gym, the kiss replaying in his head over and over again. 

You sat there for a moment, still not being able to process what just happened. Your heart was pounding like crazy, almost trying to jump out of your chest. The vibrations of your heart beat reached your chest, followed by your uneven breathing. Yet despite all of this chaos, you could still feel the warmth of his lips on yours. 

You still feel the presence of him next to you. Slowly, a small smile crept onto your kiss.  After you collected yourself, you finally stepped out of the photobooth. Your heart was still racing as you pulled at the photo strip hanging from the slot. As you looked at the photostrip, the last shot catched your attention, making you snicker to yourself.

You probably look like a crazy woman right now.

The one before the last shot caught your attention–the one right before the kiss. There was something with the way he looked at you, something you had noticed before, but didn’t care for. And now that you realised what it meant, you couldn’t look away. 

And it was then, standing outside the photobooth alone got you to realise just how much you liked this moment. You liked that kiss. You liked Heeseung. The thought alone hit you like a ton of bricks. All this time, you’d been so focused on Beomgyu yet It was Heeseung all along, standing right infront you yet you were so blind. 

The once crush on Beomgyu that had felt so secure was torn by in seconds through that kiss. All that you knew was crushed by the boy you thought was stuck up and a geek. 

Heeseung didn’t know what to do. He was in a state of confusion. Why did he kiss you? He knows you like Beomgyu. And why did you kiss him back? You like Beomgyu. Heeseung thought of himself as so fucking stupid. Why did he leave you like that? He wanted to hug you so badly and pour everything that he was holding in. He didn’t know what to do with these overwhelming amount of emotions. And all of these emotions were ones he felt for you. Not anyone else.

The days that followed the kiss were a blur, he’d been stuck in his bed, ignoring every call that Beomgyu made or any other friend of his. All he could do was sigh and rethink that day at the photobooth. 

He couldn’t face Beomgyu right now knowing it was your heart that belonged to him and he sure couldn’t look at you, after knowing you liked someone else. The realisation pierced him, leaving a nasty sting. 

On the other hand, you cursed the timing for making you and Heeseung kiss right at the end of the school year. You sulked, knowing you couldn’t see Heeseung after this, having to wait a month to see him in person. So you could only take the landline and call him.

What was strange is that he didn’t pick.

Again and again.

Was he…ignoring you?

As more days passed, his absence left a hole in you. It hurt like a bitch. Seori visited occasionally only to meet your dull self. You were grateful you had your best friend by your side who comforted you everytime you slipped out a sob. Your heart winced at each time the call would go to voicemail. You knew you couldn’t take it anymore so you called your last hope.

Choi Beomgyu.

“Hey, can we talk? In person.” You said, keeping it short.

Moments later, you met him at the local park, the sight bringing memories of where you and Heeseung talked. Fuck. 

“Hey, what’s up?” Beomgyu asked, taking a seat on the bench which you followed shortly after.

“Has…Heeseung been ignoring you?” You asked, your voice filled with hesitation.

Beomgyu let out a long sigh and leaned back, looking up at the night sky. “I don’t know why, he’s never been like this.”

So he has.

“I even went to his house, but his mom just said he’s going through some kind of phase. I don’t get it dude. It’s all so confusing,” Beomgyu mindlessly ranted, “Did he ignore you too? I wouldn’t be surprised.”

“He did.” You answered, “And I think it’s all my fault.”

Beomgyu furrowed his eyebrows, looking at you now. “What happened?”

Taking a deep breath, you began,  “Beomgyu, I like you. Or at least I liked you. “ You mentally winced at the sight of his eyes widening. “But now, I think I like Heeseung. Like a lot. And… we kissed in the photo booth that day, but after that, he just ran off.”

“Like the coward he is.” Beomgyu scoffed, clearly annoyed at his best friend’s loser-ish behaviour.

“And now, he probably still thinks I have feelings for you. I wanna tell him that I like him, he just won’t pick up.” You sulked, trying not to let the tears that formed in your eye fall.

“Hey, hey.” Beomgyu rubbed his hand against your back to comfort you,”He probably feels guilty about this, that’s probably why he’s shutting everyone out. I’m really sorry this happened, but…I think all we could do for now is to wait for him until he’s ready. He’s probably overwhelmed by everything.” He sighed.

“I know Beomgyu, I just want to talk to him so bad. I want to clear everything up. I just want to see him.” You said, your voice shaky. 

“Hey, if it’s hurting you this much… I’ll try and talk to him. I’ll try to get through to him.” Beomgyu said, his voice gentle 

You sniffed, wiping a stray tear. “Thank you.”

“If it makes you stop crying.” He said with a smile. 

You went back home with a comforted heart which was still hurting a bit. If you could only see Heeseung, everything would be cured. You’d give him the biggest hug and tell him everything you’ve been holding on to.

As you looked at the landline hanging on the wall, you leaned against the cold wall of your hallway. You picked the phone, dialling the familiar number once again.

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

Each ring felt like an eternity. You gripped the phone even tighter, desperate that he’d pick up. A lump appeared in your throat as the tears that were once gone came back and rested against your eyes, threatening to fall out. 

“Please pick up…Please.” You voiced out in a whisper.

It went to voicemail.

You let out the breath you’d been holding. You let go of the telephone you had been holding. The ears that had been stinging your eyes finally fell out as you let out a sob. You just hoped he didn’t hate you and you hoped that he’d pick up your calls tomorrow.

It had been days since Heeseung and you talked. Ever since that kiss, he hasn’t talked to you or Beomgyu. But what could he do? He didn’t seem to know. Christmas Eve had arrived, a time usually filled with warmth, joy, yet he just couldn’t shake that dreaded feeling off him.

The slowly softly landed on the concrete outside the house, the night displaying the bright stars. He trudged out the house carrying a garbage bag to dispose of it. 

Meanwhile, Beomgyu stood outside his house, padded up in his winter coat, his breath made visible in the air. He watched Heeseung’s dull self make a boring chore even more boring. He had been waiting a while for Heeseung to come out the house, and to his luck, Heeseung’s timing couldn’t be more perfect. 

Though Heeseung didn’t see him at first since his mind was scattered somewhere else, Beomgyu knew just what to do. He crouched down to grab a handful of snow and made a makeshift snowball or war weapon as Beomgyu would like to call it.

Before Heeseung could even turn back, a snowball suddenly smacked him in his back. Startled, Heeseung turned around quickly as his eyes landed on the mischievous boy. 

He groaned, “Seriously?” He brushed the snow off his jacket, sighing at the annoying act.

Beomgyu only smiled, crouching down once again to throw another. This time, it went straight to his arm and Heeseung could only sigh at his childish acts.

“What do you want?” Heeseung asked, feeling annoyed.

“Came to talk.” Beomgyu said, stepping closer. “You’re a fucking idiot, you know that?” 

Heeseung raised his eyes at the insult, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes you do.” Beomgyu gazed at the boy, “You like Y/n.”

His heart skipped a beat at the mention of your name, “I mean I get it, She’s pretty.”

Heeseung’s eyes narrowed straight at him, a shot of jealousy hit him, “Dude.”

Beomgyu smiled at his reaction, “So you do like her.” He laughed.

“That doesn’t matter anymore. I fucked up.” He sighed.

The older boy shook his head, “You don’t know her. I mean have you talked to her?”

“I just don’t want to.” Heeseung said, a shaky voice emitted through his throat. “I’m…scared of what she’s going to say.”

Beomgyu sighed at his friend’s foolishness but he didn’t want to be the one to break the news of you liking him back, “You never know until you try. You should talk to her.”

Beomgyu's words had left Heeseung cluttered with thoughts. He should really talk to you. Yet he still was running away from the idea of having to do anything with you. For all he could know, he might’ve really fucked up your friendship and he jus did not want to face that. 

Heeseung started at the ground, his voice soft as a whisper, “I’m sorry I ignored you. It was stupid of me to do that.” 

Beomgyu put his hand around him as a warm, understanding gesture. “You are. But you’re my best friend. You can talk to me, you know?”

The taller boy only nodded at his words, “You know, Jay is having a christmas party now.” He said after a moment. “You should come.” 

Heeseung glanced at the boy, hesitation ran through his face but he could only nod before Boemgyu grinned at him, taking him away from his house as he headed towards Jay’s.

The cold didn’t seem to be biting anymore for Heeseung. He finally felt the relief and the comfort of christmas. The warmth of the christmas lights finally rushed towards him as he finally put on a smile to be reconciled with his best friend.

Now all he had to do was talk to you.

The warm air buzzed with sweaty teenagers and booze in every corner. There were a few garlands thrown around here and there, but that was just for the name of calling this a christmas party, though Jay just wanted to talk to girls. You were squished against some sophomores with Seori, trying to get past the drunk teenagers and head to the kitchen for some water.

“Hey, did you see Sunghoon?” Seori asked, looking around.

“No, you should probably ask Jay. I see him at the entrance.” You suggested, while taking two water bottles out the fridge. “Here.” You passed on to your best friend.

“Okay, don’t get lost or get into trouble! No drugs!” She shouted as she dived back into the pile of drunk teenagers. 

After a while, you went back into the living room, already regretting coming back into the crowd. Suddenly, a voice rang through your ears making you turn your head. 

“Hi Y/n! Didn’t know you came!” Beomgyu exclaimed, hugging you with one hand while his other was occupied with a beer.

“Yeah, Seori kinda forced me to come.” You said, with a hearty laugh. “Is he… here?” You asked, with hope.

Beomgyu smiled as he grinned, “He’s at the back. You should talk to him.” He nudged you.

You smiled, thanking him as you left to see Heeseung. The thought of seeing him brought that warm feeling back in you. Something you missed feeling. At that moment, you realised how much of a void he left in you when he went M.I.A. 

He was standing there, looking slightly out of place. His bambi eyes still managed to shine through the dark setting. You took in a deep breath and went up to him.

“Heeseung. Hi.” 

Heeseung’s heartbeat quickened. He gulped looking over you. “Hey, Y/n.”

“How are you?” You said, trying to engage in small talk knowing you wanted more than to hug him and clear everything up.

“I’m well. Finally got out of the house.” He slowly spoke, taking a sip out of his red cup. “How bout you?” 

“I’m okay…” To be honest, you weren’t. You had spent so much time thinking about Heeseung and your feelings and how that whole moment at the photobooth felt. Just the thought of him and your countless failed attempts at calling him never left your mind.

“You never picked up.” You curtly said. “I was…waiting for you.”

“I’m so sorry Y/n. I never meant to ignore you.” He said, coming closer to you. “I thought you were mad at me.”

“I’d never.” You smiled sincerely, looking up at him. 

He smiled at that. “Merry Christmas Y/n.” The boy said softly, a small smile played on his lips.

You giggled as you came closer. “Merry Christmas Seung.” 

The tension between you both wore away. It felt normal again. It felt like the same old you and the same old Heeseung. And you liked how it was right now. 

But just as you were about to say something more, Jake spoke up. “Yo, you guys are standing under the mistletoe.” He yelled as he pointed at the sprig of mistletoe above you both. 

“KISS! KISS! KISS!” The chants echoed throughout the room, and all you could look at was how flushed Heeseung looked. You needed to let him know that you liked him now. You weren’t able to let out the words before so you took a step closer to him. 

You could see how red his ears were to which you smiled at. Cute. As you looked at him for consent through your doe eyes, he took the cue to hook his hands around your waist, filling the gap between you two. You instinctively put your arms around his necks, bringing his face closer to you. 

Just as Heeseung leaned in closer, with his breath feeling warm against your skin. Jay suddenly barged through the crowd, his voice loud enough to cut through the speaker’s music. You just caught him and just like that he slipped through your fingers. 

“Shit, Y/n!” 

You turned around startled, unconsciously pushing Heeseung away. “What’s wrong?”

“Seori’s crying.” Jay said, in a quieter voice. 

Your heart immediately sank, the moment you both had immediately fading away.  

“Fuck, is she okay?” You asked, voicing your concern. 

“Man, is this kiss gonna happen?” Jake said, tired of waiting. 

“Shut the fuck up, man!” You yelled before following Jay with Heeseung. 

Echoes of boos could be heard through the room, but you didn’t care about that. The only thing in your mind was Seori. You just hoped nothing intense happened.

You were left to see a distressed Seori, bawling while Beomgyu patted her back. “Seori, what’s wrong?” You asked, in a gentle manner, wiping the tears off her face.

“Sunghoon—kissed Junhee!” Seori hiccuped.

You immediately hugged her, her sniffles now becoming muffled. “I thought—we had something!” 

The tears soaked through your shirt as you as she let out uncontrollable sobs. You have never seen her like this in all of your seventeen years of living. It honestly broke your heart to see her in this state and realising how much that douchebag meant to her after countlessly brushing off the times you’ve teased her about being wrapped around his finger.

It fucking sucked to see your best friend being torn into bits all because she liked a boy. You were too much into comforting Soeri that you completely forgot about your surroundings—even Heeseung.

“Let’s go home, okay?” You spoke in a gentle manner, squeezing her tight as you spoke to which she only nodded.

You headed out the door, thanking Beomgyu and Jay. Heeseung mindlessly followed you two, a soft look on his face.

As you led Seori out the party and onto the porch, her sobs got quieter as she hiccuped occasionally. The air fresh from December hit your face, the windy atmosphere almost feeling harsher towards you. 

You finally let her out of your grip to let her collect herself and cool off a bit. You friend to Heeseung who was already looking at you with the light from the street lamps shining through his eyes.

“I’m..sorry we didn’t get to talk.” You mumbled, looking at him through your eyelashes.

“Don’t apologise. You did the right thing.” He reassured you with a soft smile, rubbing your arm as a gesture of comfort which made you smile back.

“We can always talk later, dork.” 

You missed him calling you that. You missed everything he did.

“Merry Christmas, Seung.” You said, tiptoeing to kiss him on the cheek. 

His eyes sprightly widened at that. He honestly couldn’t believe his eyes. A pretty girl just kissed him—correction; the prettiest girl in the world just kissed him. He felt like he won the lottery and the price was you. 

“Merry Christmas Y/n. Get home safe.” He said, as you walked away from him, hand in hand with Seori who was deep in her thoughts.

You waved towards him, your attention on him now converting to Seori who was beside you as you both headed to her house.

Heeseung touched the sticky mark that your lipgloss left on his cheek. The warmth of your small kiss still lingered on his cheek. As you disappeared from his sight, he knew he had to pour his heart and soul to the girl who had stolen his heart.

You always thought of spending a new year’s eve party at someone’s house, drinking booze and dancing with people left and right. But you realised, this year felt different. You leaned against the cold window of your bedroom, it was slightly drizzling outside. The sound of your tv turned on for the new year’s parade complimented the white noise you could hear from outside your room. 

It felt almost lonely, you turned around looking at the scenery of the night, the stars resting against the night sky. You had already beeped Seori through your pager but she has yet to call you, leaving you wondering what she was up to now.

Suddenly, a small thud against the window jolted you from your thoughts. Startled, you turned around to see the commotion outside. As you peered out the window, you saw four familiar figures standing outside your house, one of them wiggling a bag of soju bottles and snacks. 

Ofcourse, they’d show up unannounced. 

You rolled your eyes at the sight of Seori, Beomgyu and Heeseung showing up in front of your door, to your surprise. You quickly went downstairs to let them inside and showed them to your bedroom. 

“What are you guys doing here?” You asked, as you sat down on the cold floor where you were once seated.

“Saving your ass from a boring new year, duh!” Seori said, placing the bottles on the floor as she took a seat next to you.

“You guys really didn’t have to do this.” You said, though your eyes went up to Heeseung, like he was the only person who was in the room. You couldn’t keep your eyes off of that glow that he gave.

“Ey, it was more an excuse just to get black out drunk.” Beomgyu nudged your rib cage after sitting down next to you as Heeseung sat in front of you, not a ward out of his mouth.

As the night progressed, you four got comfortable and you later found out how much of a good pair Seori mixed with Beomgyu was. Though, you didn’t expect them to actually stick to their words and get wasted. Laughter echoed from them every five minutes and long before you knew it, Seori started blabbering mindless words while Beomgyu giggled at the smallest thing. 

“Beomgyu, what do you know about love?” Seori said, as she spread her legs, lying on the floor.

“Love?” Beomgyu giggled, “That’s funny.”

“Hey, have you ever been in love?” Seori mumbled to him.

“With soju, yeah.” He joked, earning a light hit from Seori.

“You kids still have to experience the heartbreak to know what love is.” Seori scoffed, her hands on her stomach as she looked at the ceiling. It was clear she was referencing what happened to her a few days ago.

Heeseung had now gotten closer, sitting right next to you. You both hadn’t talked about what happened that night, leaving unspoken words in the air. Though you both had eased in the awkwardness and got to talking a lot, not minding the two drunkards. 

“She’s so funny when she’s drunk.” You laughed at her state.

“Beomgyu’s worse.” Heeseung added in. 

“They make a good match.” You said, sighing at their foolishness. Heeseung smiling along with you.

A few hours, closer to midnight. Seori and Beomgyu were passed out, only leaving you two up to witness going into the new millennium. 

“It’s almost midnight.” You pointed out, as crowds started to appear at the sighting for the fireworks, you intently watched it through the small tv you had in your room. 

“Yeah,” Heeseung replied, his voice low and soft. 

“Hey listen, I’ve been thinking about what you said the other day.” He said, making you go back to the night of Christmas Eve, the thought leaving a fresh mark in your mind.

You turned to look at Heeseung who was already staring at you with his bambi eyes. 

“I think this is long overdue,” He sighed. “But I just wanted to tell you that I like you, a lot. More than just a friend. You’re really pretty and you’re such a dork, it makes me go crazy.” He slightly chuckled, making you smile at his silly speech. 

“I mean every single word I say. I don’t think I can start the new year by not telling you how you make me go crazy.” He softly said.

You had no words.

You realised you couldn't make up a small speech like his. It felt like too much to say. You had been pushing away your feelings for him, because you were too into Beomgyu’s handsome face. But after him opening your eyes wide, you realised the pretty boy sitting next to you was all you could ask for your new year’s wish. You looked at him through your eyelashes, your mouth slightly agape. 

You just wanted to kiss him.

So why not?

You leaned in, ever so slightly. You kissed him. The world outside seemed to slowly fade away. The countdown on the tv and the gentle snores from Seori and Beomgyu served as background noise. You could practically hear your heartbeat along with Heeseung’s. You could feel the slight taste of soju as his warm lips pressed against yours, his hand slowly reached its way to the back of your neck to pull you in closer. It felt like his lips against yours was the only thing that mattered.

3! 2! 1!

The fireworks started.

The kiss started in 1999 and ended in 2000, the clock struck twelve as the new year came in. You pulled away, exhaling that breath you didn't know you held in. You couldn’t help but giggle softly, as he finally cracked a smile.

“I like you too, alot.” You looked at him, he rested his forehead against yours. “Guess I fell for the wrong best friend.”

“I guess I fell for a dork.” He joked, earning a slight tap on his chest by your hand. “At least, that dork is mine, I hope.”

“I’d love to be yours, Hee.” 

Heeseung smiled at that, pecking you quickly. “Happy new year, dork.”

“Happy new year, Seung.” You replied, emotions filling you full.

He found his way to your lips again, kissing you with a tighter grip, and in that moment, you finally caught him—you weren’t letting the boy go anywhere. The boy who intimidated you at first, who called you a dork and now his, who cleaned your wounds and gave you piggyback rides. The boy who was your first love, now leaving him to adore you.

❨ READ MORE ❩ ៸៸ loading tapes . . .

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‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎‎‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎‎ ‎‎prod yeokii ! do not copy, repost, translate any of my works

[bnhaobservation]

Todoroki family and chap 430

In case it wasn't obvious by now, I was very invested in the Todoroki family storiline and one of the things that sadden me the most about chap 430 is this image.

We've Enji, or maybe I should say Endeavor, Rei is pushing his wheelchair as he goes somewhere, we don't know where, some want to think he's visiting Touya but it's not said and, around him there are 3 men and a woman.

It's not his children, it's his sidekicks and Hawks.

The final chapter doesn't touch what happened to Natsuo and Fuyumi, we've to assume Fuyumi is happy with her work and Natsuo with his marriage.

We don't know if Touya is still alive but, anyway, he's going to die. Even if we assume he died happily he had said smiling was why they lived their lives. He could keep on living out of anger and grudge but not out of smiles and happiness?

Fuyumi has fought for all those years so hard because she wanted back her family and she basically get nothing, not her old family as Natsuo leaves and Touya dies and it's not even hinted she has a new one as it was Natsuo the one who got a girlfriend as soon as he entered university and marries her basically a year and a half later.

Natsuo is just rushedly married to this character of which we don't even know the name. We don't know if, in the end he visited Touya again or not, we don't know if he ever managed to overcome all the anger and pain he felt inside for how his father ruined the family.

Shouto became a Hero, but his mother is not with him to support him but she is with his father. We don't see his siblings around him, cheering for him. We don't know which effect had on him to reconnect with Touya only to lose him. We're only told he became a good Hero so people don't call him anymore Endeavor's son, forgetting people also looked poorly at him for being Dabi's brother. How did he overcome that? Evidently it somehow disappeared as all the first years are already all his fans and even Dai said all the kids wanted to be like Shouto... but, at the end of the day, we aren't shown Shouto having a good moment with his family, his good moments come from being a Hero and being with his friends.

Even if we assume that, despite having to marry Enji out of duty to help her family, Rei had fallen in love with Enji while their family was having a good time before he turned abusive, and now that she had forgiven him and he stopped being abusive she's glad to be back with him... skipping this was very vaguely constructed she lost 10 years in a hospital and we can't see her with her children. She's supposed to be happy being with him with one of her children dead and one of her children keeping away from his father because just being in the same room with him makes him feel bad.

Mind you, I'm not saying Natsuo should forgive Enji or force himself to be with Enji or whatever but having a person that's related to you that makes you to feel bad just by being in the same room with you so that you've to avoid that person, is not something that's good. If Enji and Rei live together and Natsuo wants to visit his mother he has to make sure to do it when his father is somewhere else. In the past Rei was split between taking care of Shouto, who couldn't be with her other children, and taking care of Touya, Fuyumi and Natsuo, with the result Natsuo felt neglected because he was very small when all this happened and needed his mother... but likely she ended up neglecting Fuyumi and Touya too because you can't be in two places at the same time. Now, instead than having to take turns with Shouto, Natsuo have to take turns with Enji.

Ad for Enji... all his atonement for what? He doesn't manage to rebuild a relation with his children, apparently his sidekicks and Hawks have replaced them, they're conveniently of the right number. His children would have gotten where they were even without his atonement because all we hear is about others helping them, he only get the cool sentence, we see nothing of his struggle. But this is also supposed to be a happy ending for him. Who care if he doesn't have his kids? He has his sidekicks and Hawks his newfound family he would have had anyway had he focused on his work only.

The story tried it's hardest to make me think he cared about his family but then I'm supposed to think he's happy not having any of the sort apart for Rei and a new found family.

Horikishi had already established in the previous chapter Enji would have his sidekicks and Hawks' support, I didn't need a reminder of that.

I needed to see THIS image at the end...

...maybe including Natsuo's girlfriend as he could have introduced her to the rest of the family... or him holding his firstborn and letting Rei see her grandchild.

I needed to see Fuyumi finding someone with whom to form a family since she can't have her own back and she wished so badly for it.

I needed to have this being shown to me...

...or at least to see Touya out of that contraption as he died in peace, a smile on his lips since happiness somehow couldn't save him but grudge could.

I needed to be told something that Enji did that HELPED his kids, that made them be better. Not something vague, I need something concrete. Even if they would never be with him, since he's supposed to atone to them, I need him to make something more than just give them a new house and pay for the bills because he'd been paying bills through all his life so that's not new.

I would have been fine with him watching them smile from a distance or hearing from Rei how they were doing and smiling.

Mind you, I'm willing to believe in Horikoshi's mind Enji now is a changed man and very sorry for what he did and loves his family and yadda yadda but there's a reason why we say 'show, don't tell' and so far Horikoshi is more interested in telling than showing.

I get that in his mind Enji is a character more important than Rei, Fuyumi, Natsuo or even Touya, I would have been fine with all that I've mentioned being shown through his perspective because he cares about his family and so he's happy if they're happy.

If, in all that talking Midoriya does about reaching out to others, what he wanted to point out was Enji had continued to reach out to help his family even if they had cut him out of their lives.

But no, the good part is that his sidekicks and Hawks are reaching out for him. Okay, I can take this as the test trying again to point out Enji will never be a Hero, in the end he's not the one reaching out but the one others have to reach out to help but, again, it was established in the past chapter so I didn't need a reminder and it kind of steps all over his arc of trying to reach out for his family.

In the end the most he does is to just take it when they want to yell at him and let them live the live they want... I do think it's a great thing if an abuser were to realize what he had done to his victims and try to atone. It's kind of a miracle turned true... but there's just too little of it in this story.

Maybe I'm missing some deep cultural context, maybe Enji is doing something AMAZING for his family that Horikoshi thought he didn't need to show because it's obvious to Japanese readers but... but I wish he had shown it. Instead the moment Enji finally stop being a Hero and could do something for his family, the manga ends with his family disregating but I'm supposed to see it as a happy ending.

I prefer it had just been called a sad ending. Bad things happen, I can stomach them but honestly "Ano Hana" makes a much better work at portraying grief and atonement and the same goes for "Koe no katachi".

Horikoshi knew he was selling this manga also to foreign readers. I'm not saying he should have made his manga thinking to them but, if this atonement arc was so important, maybe he should have made it more understandable for us as well. This makes the diffference between a national mangaka and an international one.

[skubean]

Headcanons for Aihaitham, Vox, Luca, and Rei with shy gn s/o?

hi, anon, i did get your request, and thank you !! hope you like this <3

Vox, Luca, Alhaitham & Rei with a Shy! GN Lover

characters: vox akuma & luca kaneshiro from luxiem, alhaitham from genshin impact and suwa rei from buddy daddies

notes: gender neutral reader, slightly ooc, uses of petnames such as love and darling, just fluff, nothing else enjoy!! (haven't proofread yet, so lmk of any errors!)

[ vox akuma ]

you've known vox to be someone who isn't shy with affection nor words, so he definitely likes bringing out a reaction out of you knowing that you're shy.

pda is his thing, and the first time he held you and you got so red, the image of that is basically permanently planted in his head.

vox is very reliable, so i assume that he would be the type that will do stuff for you if you can't. for example, he'll initiate most of the affection and will always be sure that you're comfortable.

he would ask for permission before touching you, so that you don't get surprised when he suddenly snakes an arm around your waist while your doing some chores.

he definitely notices your efforts in being the first to approach him, but he'll never push you to do it. so imagine how proud he was when you were the first to ask for a kiss after you both started dating.

"my, isn't this something, darling?", still manages to tease you before he gently leans into your lips, slightly feeling you tremble before holding you tight to reassure you.

he would tease you sometimes, but doesn't do it often because he doesn't wanna make you feel uncomfortable. so, he'll only usually do it if he notices that you're being playful.

the type to definitely sneak kisses when he thinks your asleep because he just finds you adorable!

overall, isn't really a problem to him knowing that his loveable significant other is shy around him, in fact, he likes it!

[ luca kaneshiro ]

luca's very social! so it was a surprise to him at first when he found out that you were actually shy.

hesitant to tease you, but does it anyway lmao

he thought you didn't like him, that's why you were so quiet (you were actually so into him, you just didn't know what to do)

once you both progressed into the relationship, luca would be the type that would play small pranks on you to see your reaction (mostly because he wants to see you smile)

isn't pushy with pda, but you can never resist his puppy eyes. he doesn't even know it's his charm, it just works!

pda in public happens occasionally, mostly because it's you who initiate it. otherwise, luca wouldn't want to push it (not that he doesn't like it, he's also kinda flushdge)

luca's a man of many words, so he's definitely one to tell you plenty of stories while you listen attentively.

talks a lot, listens kinda trope

after a while, luca's become a natural around you. he knows you best when others don't! so, people sometimes say that he's a pro when it comes to you.

"ofc i'm an expert! i'm the best bf ever", makes you laugh when he says that in a silly voice.

long story short, luca's the type of so who tries his best to make you feel comfortable, so he's definitely the #1 material man.

(more utc!)

[ alhaitham ]

ah, yes. the scribe. the acting grand sage. the man who ppl assume has no care for others and is extremely ignorant.

lies. lies everywhere.

alhaitham is the type to act really cold or carefree in front of others, but in front of you? baby.

it's probably your shy nature that makes him so comfortable. (prefers you over anything, so >>>>)

comes home and would drape himself all over you, while you get all flustered and red. this man will just laugh and pecks your cheek.

hes cheeky like that, i just know it.

very protective. literal definition of protective.

saw kaveh try to talk to you one time while he wasn't home and mans ran just to push kaveh away from you.

people know that you're both together because alhaitham makes it a habit to flaunt his locket of you every chance he has.

"acting grand sage, regarding this matter-" "it's 5. work is done. now, if you'll excuse me, i have someone waiting for me at home", literally leaves the office in the middle of a meeting bcs he will never come home late.

"love, im home" "uh, haitham, your co-worker called-" "pay them no mind, love. they're idiots", gets all handsy with you.

alhaitham doesn't really care that you're shy, he actually likes when you act all natural and blush around him only.

anyways, you're his beloved that he cares more than anything else. lowkey a simp. (i love goofy alhaitham sm im sorry)

[ suwa rei ]

rei is not a man of many words, we know that. so he doesn't really mind your preserved nature. in fact, it's like you both connect telepathically.

you were the first to ask him out (much to your own surprise), and rei thought you were really cool.

i feel like rei is also protective but he hides it a lot. the type who would sort of stalk you just to make sure your safe.

he may not talk much, but he does it for you. he knows what it feels like not being able to speak, so he doesn't push it onto you.

you and kazuki are probably besties, because kazuki bribes you with information abt rei you've never heard of before, and rei is always trying to separate you both.

he actually likes seeing you all sparkly and excited.

the both of you were pretty awkward early on in the relationship since talking wasn't really a thing.

but after a while, rei got used to the idea of having you around that he doesn't act all lazy anymore (kazuki thanks the lord for you).

if you also play games, expect a lot of late night dates where you both play games and hang out.

rei trusts you with his life, and is probably most comfortable with you. so, he isn't shy to prove that he loves you.

confesses out of the blue so often just to make sure you still love him.

"y/n." "yea, rei?" "i love you", sees your cheeks redden and smirks in satisfaction. (hes a fucking tease, i just know so)

overall, rei is the best if you're an introvert or prefer quiet dates. idk i just feel like rei doesn't mind you being shy because he himself has no care for anything skskksk (in a good way ofc).

a/n: okay, i just wrote what came into mind, so im sorry if this is a little scuffed! since valentine is tomorrow, feel free to request for valentine-themed hcs or imagines -> here!

happy early valentine's everyone <3 i'm spending it alone sadge T.T but i'll probably write some fics tmrw! see you - eden

[adamworu]

Kaworu and Rei still remain as the most interesting characters in Eva franchise to me after all these years. Their knowledge derives in the metaphysical. That one can and does exist beyond physical means. That everyone dies twice. When life first leaves the shell and when the last soul speaks your name. It makes sense too. How the characters most versed in identity are those not allowed to fully to exist in peace. Kaworu exists within a cyclical narrative that dooms him to never being allowed to live or die in his own means. Someone versed on the cycle but trapped anyway. Is it any wonder then, why Kaworu thinks of life and death as identical? Rei from start to finish always been a vessel of forced maternity and general baggage. She is treated as spare parts. Rei likens herself to flowers but only ever perceives them for use or lack thereof. They exist but many aren't 'needed.' Their existence and visage are strongly controlled. Always under someone's thumb. Is it any wonder then, why Kaworu and Rei stand in front of Shinji in End of Evangelion aside from Shinji's representations?

They're both well versed. They're powerful beings that have existed beyond time and space yet still are very much trapped by an undercurrent of forced stagnation within Eva.

Knowing is suffering.

[animentality]

And yes. These are all characters from my demon summoning assassin novel, 7 Deadly Habits of the Modern Demon Summoner.

Which is COMPLETELY FREE to download on the free Kindle app (available for iOS, Android, tablet, etc. on the app store) from February 22nd to February 26th!

eBook only, but if you download it for free now, and like it, then you can always buy the physical copy to have on your shelf :D

Link here.

Full description below. I'd appreciate a reblog/signal boost, because I don't want anyone to miss grabbing the book while it's most accessible. But also vote on which one you think is the worst, because I promise you, they are much, much, much worse in the actual novel.

Anyway. Thanks for listening. Sorry to bother. But not that sorry.

Transcription in case the photo does not load:

Twenty-three-year-old CEO Don Francisco wants one of the richest women in the world dead. Which one? Daphne Oakland: actress, model, heir to the Oakland financial empire, and unbeknownst to the general public, talented demon summoner. But since Francisco isn’t nearly as rich as the established Oakland family, he hires the only assassin he can afford: Sebastián Monterey, a down-on-his-luck, struggling demon summoner, the cheapest and lowest ranking one there is.

But Monterey is nothing like Cisco expected. He’s high-spirited, reckless, relentlessly cheerful …and worse, he’s a bit of a slut. The CEO is horrified to find out that Monterey has not just one, but seven angry exes in the killing business, who will stop at nothing to get in the way of an already impossible hit. Not only do they have personal reasons for wanting to see their former lover dead, they also have professional reasons: they are all currently employed by the Oakland family members!

To make matters worse, Monterey finds out the Oaklands are each protecting a demon ritual artifact for Daphne. When brought together, all 7 can be used to summon a demon more powerful than any currently contracted on earth. If he is to carry out this hit at all, he’ll have to interfere with the summon by stealing every artifact, and maybe even summon the demon before Daphne can.

But that's only if none of his exes kill him first!

And here's some lovely art of the MC, Rey, which I commissioned from the talented @marcissistv (Twitter).

[junglejim4322]

when this one blog followed me and i clicked on it and all of their previous posts were answering increasingly deranged asks about chappel roan (and now ethel cain too) and the more i read the more i realized they were a cryptoterf zionist taylor swift fan . Most U betrayed the white creed shit Ive ever seen

I made a post saying “chappell roan the first campy pop star with no gay male fans” when she was first coming up before she hit A list that got a couple thousand notes and I’m not joking I think I got the most unexpected vicious backlash I’ve experienced since like the tumblrinaction days. There were people in my notes saying shit like good we don’t want faggots at her concerts anyway and people writing essays on why I was a lesbophobe in my inbox. One person took it upon themselves to send me no joke like 15 anons and other people (I knew this would happen lol) mined my blog to find the least respectable artist I was a fan of (Lana del rey) (she also has ‘you betrayed the white creed’ fans too idk why people think liking music is endorsing someones fans or character be real) to say I was homophobic/a misogynist (?) because of the fact I like other mediocre white people but not her lol. Anyway when she released those videos calling her fans creepy and saying they have no boundaries I couldn’t be less surprised like yep I microdosed her fans one time and she put how obsessed they are mildly. Huge tangent here but I’m just speaking my mind being real x

[shehsart]

Anyways REI TODOROKI: one of the best written female characters I've seen in a long time and very VERY refreshing take from how shounen usually tackles women. It either kills the mother figure or leaves her existence a mystery. Or just one inspirational quote for the protagonist's power up but no. But here we have Rei guys, she's over 40, freaking gorgeous, mother to a hero and a villain. Doesn't need to be brash or violent to show she's powerful. Went through extremely harsh abuse the worst kind imaginable but came out stronger. Tiny but resilient. Spent 11 years of her life at a mental hospital, sees her son reveal to the public that he's a mass murderer and instead of breaking down she goes to confront her abusive husband about it (again he was so triggering for her) Rei who's words made Shoto want to be a hero despite the negative outlook Enji gave him about heroes. Sees dabi's inferno which is so hot people are told not to even look that way but she rides a robot towards it and runs into it even when she has zero resistance to flames. Rei who's still guilty about Touya blaming her back when he was 13. Endeavour not being able to do anything about it but Rei's quick actions delay the explosion until Shoto arrives. Thank you Horikoshi for giving her character closure. Rei todoroki the most woman ever.

[thehollowprince]

We're a few days away from the premiere of The Acolyte, and this showed up on my Google Recommendations. Against my better judgment, because it's Screenrant, I opened it anyway, and I'm a little torn.

Like, on the one hand, I've never viewed the Jedi as gods, literal or otherwise, but I fully admit there has been a kind of deification of characters like Luke Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Qui-Gon Jinn, and more recently with newer characters like Rey and Ahsoka. Even Anakin, though, to a lesser extent. There have been quite a number of people who have looked at these characters and said

"This is what a Jedi is supposed to be and nothing else."

Of course, it's been that exact sentiment that has led to a lot of negativity toward other Jedi, namely Mace Windu, but also Yoda and Luminara and Ki-Adi-Mundi.

But since there are no legacy characters in this show (with the possible exception of a Yoda cameo), I'm hoping this show will look at the Jedi as what they are, warrior monks doing the best they can to keep the peace in an ever more chaotic galaxy.

Charlie Barnett (Yord Fandar) said this

I want to talk specifically about the first half of this quote.

"It's like that moment when you realize that your parents aren't gods, do you know what I'm saying? That kind of mysticism plays out., and I think Yord is stuck in and committed to being in the 'Jedi are gods' sentiment. He is a Jedi Knight, and he's fairly new to the position too, so he is very excited to do it right...

I am all for exploring the "flaws" of the Jedi (such as they are) by showing a character that grew up with this expectation of what a Jedi was supposed to be (basically the galaxy's version of superheroes) only to find out that it's not all like it was in the holos.

The only downside I have with this is the fact that Yord would have grown up in the Temple and realized that the Jedi aren't these superbeings. Sure, he could have idolized his teachers and masters, but not to the extent that he'd be blind to the realities of the position.

And then we have this.

I remember reading the interview with Dafne Keen in Empire where she talks about her character (Jecki Lon) and how, even though she's just a Padawan, she's a better Jedi than Yord.

That rubs me the wrong way. Not every Jedi is obviously equal in all talents. Anakin, for example, was one of the best lightsaber duelests of the Order, even when he was just a padawan, but he lacked focus and control, something Obi-Wan had in spades. Same with Ahsoka later, with her being an exceptionally talented padawan but letting her anger get the better of her sometimes, as well as her pride. Yoda was the wisest member of the Order, but Mace was the Order's best duelist.

You get what I'm saying?

Even Obi-Wan had an answer pointed out to him by a youngling in Attack of the Clones. They all have their strengths and weaknesses, and they compensate by working as a whole.

So, while I don't have a problem with Jecki being a better duelist or being stronger in the Force than Yord, it's irritating when it's labeled as her just being a better Jedi. Another thing I remember specifically from her interview was her saying that the only reason Yord became a Jedi Knight was because he was older, and I didn't like that, because that's not how the Order works!

Who knows, maybe I'm reading to much into this, because I've been pretty vocal about how most of what's been said about this show behind-the-scenes has been pretty anti Jedi and this just feels like a continuation of that train of thought. I have no problem with Yord being proud or angry or even falling to the Dark Side and becoming this acolyte. I'm just nervous about how they're framing it all.

[qwertyluverz]

[🐚] eternity - neteyam x (metkayina) reader

I’ll be with you for eternity

[MAJOR SPOILERS]

✧ in which reader takes an interest in neteyam

warnings ✧ blood + angst + gunshot + violence + slowburn (kinda) + probably ooc neteyam

word count ✧ around 2.5k

[A/N]  ✧ i was listening to say yes to heaven by lana del rey. so this fic is somewhat based on the song  🤭. ANYWAYS first fic and i love angst and death and neteyam so #whynot, also send in request bc im eager to write more for the new avatar characters !!! also did not realize how long this was…

#wrotethisinonesittinganditisnotproofreadwhatsoever

                              ∘ ───♡༉─── ∘

Ever since the Sully’s arrived, the formidable village routine shifted; at least with you. 

The Omatikaya family stood on the shore with courage and respect. Villagers of all ages surrounded them with interest, immediately beginning to judge their arrival. Your appearance came shortly after as you followed behind Tsireya, your closest friend in the reef, as you both disconnected your queues from your ilus, the Sully boys both watching in interest 

Almost like a shadow to Tsireya, you stood behind her in the crowd, observing the dark blue Na’vis as you fiddled with your bracelets that covered your arms loosely. You eyed them up and down until you locked eyes with the eldest son. It felt as if a heart string was pulled, feeling your pulse pound at the miniscule interaction. His golden eyes stared deeply into your bright green eyes, almost an invitation to see who would back down. You squinted at him before turning away and disappearing into the crowd. Mindlessly, the elder son lifted his head up in attempt to follow your trail, but had lost you in the sea of heads.

A sigh escaped your lips while you made your way back to your ilu. She was a dark gray, almost black ilu with beautiful white markings. Tuhi, was her name. You smiled fondly at Tuhi, reminiscing on the significance of her name; your mothers name. She was taken so early from your life and due to what you considered, a mere sickness. You felt resentment towards Ewya. How could she take your mother? And how could the Tsahìk fail your family? Ronal was intimidating to say the least, but you had your grudges against her. Although you never confidied with Tsireya about your feelings with her mother, she had eased the pain you felt.

You held your hand to Tuhi’s face, rubbing the side of her neck. “Hey girl,” You took your hand and connected your queues, relishing the connection you had with your companion.

“(Y/N)!” You heard a soft voice call to you, just as you were about to take off.

“Huh..?” You turned around with confusion as you noticed Tsireya, motioning you over towards the mauris with her one free hand. In her other, she held a box of some sort, her farce adorning a warm smile.

You gave Tuhi a small pat and disconnected your queues while you waved a small goodbye. A light sigh fell from your lips as you made your way to Tsireya.

“What’s up?” You asked, folding your arms over eachother.

“I am showing the Sully’s around!” She beamed with excitement. Despite not knowing who are what the Sully’s are, you could only assume it was the new Na’vis.

“And what does that have to do with me?” you continued on, simply wanting to enjoy your time with your Ilu.

“Come assist me, Sister! I was given the duty to teach them our ways, and you know Ao’nung won’t be help.” She concluded, putting the box by her feet and grabbed onto your arm, pleading you with her eyes.

In the most dramatic way possible, you rolled your head over and managed to work out a very annoyed “fine”, despite there being a small smile on your lips.

You followed Tsireya as she gave a tour to Sully family, learning names along the way. The oldest girl, Kiri seemed to hate every second her time there, which you didn’t mind. Lo’ak, the younger brother in the family, was clearly infatuated with Tsireya the whole tour. Tuk, the youngest Sully, had an insane amount of energy, and for some unexplained reason you absolutely loved her. And Neteyam. The oldest Sully sibling, he easily was the most mature and whether you two would bump heads or get along was unclear, yet strangely, you loved it.

Neteyam’s eyes were traced on you during the small tour, the way your hair moved with each step and every clang of your beaded bracelets that went all the way up to your elbow, enticed him. Staring was rude, but he couldn’t help it.

                              ∘ ───♡༉─── ∘

You, Tsireya, Ao’nung, and Roxto all dived into the water one by one. Tsireya taking a more graceful approach and you and the others just jumping right in. Free diving was peaceful and crucial to metkayina culture.

Easily, you and the others outswam the sully children. Their constant gasps for air and terrible form had led them to fall behind.

‘They’re terrible divers.’ Ao’nung signed as you smiled in amusement. Tsireya shot down the claim, signing back that, ‘ they’re learning’.

You watched the Na’vis at the surface while they tried making sense of Tsireya’s signings. Neteyam and Lo’ak eventually motioned for your group to come to the surface.

“Holy shit, you guys suck.” You laughed out, moving your hair out of your face. Slightly disappointed, Tsireya slaped your shoulder in retaliation, the Sully’s taking their turn to smile at your misfortune. You rubbed your shoulder while Tsireya began to formulate a new teaching strategy.

                              ∘ ───♡༉─── ∘

As the days went on, you had warmed up to your new routine: wake up, train the sullys, adventure, go to sleep. It was so simple, yet so enjoyable. Teaching sessions had spilt up, you taking Neteyam, and Tsireya taking Lo’ak.

Tsireya showed Lo’ak compassionate and thoughtful ways of teaching, while you showered Neteyam with teasing and sarcastic (truthful) words.

“No! Like this. You breathe like this.” You demonstrated to the older boy, placing your hands on your stomach.

“Like this?” He asked, golden eyes staring straight into your own rather than your hands, his breathing staying the exact same.

“No! You don’t listen. You’re like a baby.” You spoke, forcefully grabbing his soft yet calloused hands into your own, directing them onto his stomach and chest.

Silence.

Realization dawned upon you with a mental note of your position. Neteyam simply looked away, as your eye’s decidedd to find interest in the sand below you. The intimacy of your smaller hands over his larger ones, and you leaned towards him was too much for you to bear. Neteyam, too felt embarrassment — maybe it was the silence.

“Um..” of course. Your voice cracked, sounding two octaves higher. Internally you punched yourself, attempting to fight off the wave of heat you felt rise to your cheeks. Neteyam turned his nervous gaze back to you, a smile creeping up on his lips in amusement. You raised your head up towards the Na’vi, bright eyes locking with his own.

“Just breathe..” you muttered out, your voice barely audible as both your heartbeats molded into one.

“You don’t need to be so scared…” commenting on his fast heartbeat, a mere attempt to shift the focus back onto your teachings.

And other times, you would simply push Neteyam into the water. Unannounced.

Him walking to his mauri after his father called? Pushed.

Sitting on the walkway with his feet in the water? Pushed.

Literally minding his own business? Pushed.

Neteyam called it torture, but you called it reality.

“A good diver should always be prepared to get wet!” You shouted to him with excitement when he resurfaced. Him annoyed, you amused.

Eventually, your teaching sessions became extended adventures, sometimes taking along Tuk because you couldn’t resist her. You had found a habit in carrying her everywhere for reasons you couldn’t understand.

You and Neteyam both rode on Tuhi throughout the reef, and despite Neteyam’s grip on your waist, you paid no mind as the scenery of your home took all your attention. You never got tired of the marine environment, even after all these years.

Neteyam’s eyes were locked on your side profile. He was such a starer, and yet he felt no guilt for shameless watching your every feature.

                              ∘ ───♡༉─── ∘

“What’s it like?” You spoke softly, laying on your back as you mindlessly watched the stars.

“What’s what like?” Neteyam asked, his body parallel to yours.

“The forest.”

Neteyam blinked, head turning over to yours in an instant.

“You want to know about my home?”

“Yes.”

He smiled.

“The stars. You can hardly see them at home with all the trees in the way, and at night time the forest has beautiful glow.” He turned his gaze back to the glowing sky, “My clan was known for its music and ceremonies, so there was never a night without dancing and laughter.” The fond memories of his home felt overwhelming, knowing he would probably never return to the place he grew to love.

A comforting silence fell upon the two, only the distant sound of waves crashing on the shoreline was heard.

“I want to take you there,” Neteyam spoke softly, sitting up from his lounging position.

“What?” You responded with confusion, turning your head to his. Neteyam grabbed both your hands and pulled you up to your feet with ease.

“Let me take you there.” He spoke confidently, your hands encased closley to his chest. Finally grasping what he was saying, you shook your head eagerly in compliance.

“Here. Dance with me.” He lowered your hands, his gold eyes staring straight into yours.

You slowly took your hands out of his grasp. “Metkayina’s hardly dance, only underwater..” you tilted your head to the side, adverting your gaze from Neteyam’s deep stare.

He grabbed your hands again. “Just follow me.” he moved his head back into you vision, a soft smile adorning his lips.

Hesitantly you nodded, allowing Neteyam to lead you in a traditional Omitkayn dance. The jangle of your bracelets and his own jewelry moved as one, almost as if harmonizing with eachother. Hands up, hands down, step back, twirl in his arms; everything about it was euphoria to both of you. Simultaneous laughters filled the air at every mistake, every mistep, every splash made on the alternating waves. The moonlight giving you both a glow as it reflected off the ocean’s surface.

“Neteyam! Neteyam..!” You ears perked, picking up on the voice calling for the Sully brother. Noticing Neteyam’s face drop in annoyance, you turned around, halting your nighttime dance.

“Ao’nung?” You squinted, confirming his presence. Neteyam let go of your hands and made his way towards the chief’s son.

“What is it.” He demanded, folding his arms over in irritation.

“Lo’ak. Me and my boys took him past the reef..” Ao’nung panted out, his body hunched over as he tried regaining his breath. Why he was out of breath? You haven’t gotten a clue.

“What.” Neteyam sternly replied, disbelief lacing his words.

“Past the reef.. he hasn’t returned and…”

“Skxawng!” You hissed, stepping towards Ao’nung. Sure, you and Lo’ak weren’t that close, and but any idiot would know better than to take him out the reef.

“You will tell my father about this.” Neteyam intentionally bumping shoulders with him as he passed.

Ao’nung felt guilt rise in him, as you grabbed him by the ear, dragging him behind you. Despite interrupting your dance, Ao’nung ignored whatever the hell you and Neteyam were doing.

                              ∘ ───♡༉─── ∘

The events that would happen in the next few days were chaotic to say the least.

Lo’ak supposedly befriending Payakan.

And Kiri having a sezuire while connecting to the spirit tree only showed how fond you truly are of the Sully’s.

Rushing with Tsireya and the others to bring Kiri to the Surface. Holding Tuk in your arms to calm her down, and shamefully marveling at the protectiveness Neteyam displayed towards his siblings, something you’ve only had a glimpse of. And the arrival of Jake Sully’s human friends had you questioning your sanity.

‘So much.. skypeople stuff…’ you thought to yourself, finding an interest in Jake’s weird hand ritual and the mechanism that hovered over the shore, sending tsunamis of sand on the viewing villagers, including you.

And of course the arrival of the Tulkuns. More specifically your spirit sister.

The arrival had sent the village into a state of excitement, Na’vis of all ages jumping into the waters at the familiar blowhorn. The Sully’s on the other hand watched with confusion, no one had explained to them about what was happening and why thrillful cries filled the air. Splash after splash, the Metkayina’s met to reconnect with their spiritual families.

“It is time (Y/n)!” Tsireya yiped in excitement, grabbing your hand and pulling you behind her. Weaving through the village walkways, you both arrived at the Sully’s maori.

“Come!” Tsireya ushered the family out into the water, exchanging your hand for Lo’aks. In an instant they disappeared into the waters. You eagerly rushed to Tuk and carried her into your arms. Neteyam taking in the scene with fond eyes.

“The Tulkuns have arrived!” You smiled at her, exiting her home. Kiri stayed put in the floor, only moving after constant urges by Tuk.

“Come on!” You jumped into the water with Kiri and Neteyam following suit. Quickly you called Tuhi over, adoring her beautiful patterns. Connecting your queues, the four of you were off the see the Tulkuns.

Beautiful whistles filled the underwater world as you inched closer to the Tulkuns. You grinned widely once you caught sight of your spirit sister. Lightly tugging on Tuk’s arm, you signed to her, ‘There is my spirit sister! Her name is Mevewi.’ Disconnecting your queue and motioning for Tuk to ride with Kiri, you swam to your sister. Greeting eachother, she began to tell you of her troubles and you shared your current lifestyle with the Sully’s.

Ears perked in realization, you turned around, ‘Wait here!’ You signed, swimming back towards the viewing Omatikayas. You smiled as you made your way to Neteyam. Grabbing his hands, you pulled him through the water to face Mevewì.

‘This is Neteyam. We swim together,’ Neteyam bowed his head as Mevewì teased you and the Sully boy. Unbeknownst to Neteyam, Mevewì’s teasing caused you great embarrassment, but you relished the moment with her.

The inconsistency of emotions the village felt was like no other. One day everyone was celebrating, the next people rallied for war. Clouds, heavy with rain filled the sky on the bitter morning. Almost as if Ewya had a heart to mourn with you all.

Simply, an attack on Ro’a was an attack on the clan. You joined in with the chanting and battle crys, eager for revenge on the Skypeople’s ignorance. Much to your dismay, the immediate charge for war was shot down by Jake. Advising us to warn the Tulkuns instead, and the clan complied, most furious with the agreement.

In the midst of this outbreak for war, Neteyam grabbed your hand and ushered you away. He spoke no words as he led you on Lo’ak’s trail. You stayed silent on your trip, only following the taller boy while your mind was clouded with grief.

“No way you’re rolling out of here baby brother,” Neteyam spoke, letting go of your hand as he approached Lo’ak, Ilu saddle in hand.

“I’m going to warn Payakan. He has no one to warn him.” He replied sternly, fixing the saddle on his Ilu.

“No. You must stay here you skxawng.”

“He’s an outcast. He has no one else but me!”

Neteyam sighed, placing a hand on his head, “Why do you always have to make things so hard?”

Lo’ak quickly pushed his hand off, “You mean..” he started off hesitantly, “You mean why can’t I be the perfect little soldier like you?” Neteyam ushered back in disappointment, “I’m not you Neteyam.. I’m not you.” You watched as Neteyam exhaled, clearly annoyed with his outburst as he beginning to pace on the deck. A part of you wished Neteyam didn’t bring you here to witness the dilemma.

“He’s my brother!” Lo’ak motioned towards the sea, Neteyam only stopping his pace to practically size his little brother up.

Lo’ak swiftly turned on his heel, “Oh! Oh! He’s your brother?” Neteyam spoke with disbelief, his hands gripping onto his little brother’s arm, preventing him from going any further, “No. I’m your brother.”

And with a shake of his shoulder, Lo’ak dived into the waters, ignoring the arrival of Tsireya and the others.

Quickly moving into action, Neteyam called his Ilu, “He’s going to Payakun.” He informs the others before diving into the water, you following suit.

Before you knew it, the entire teaching group was after Lo’ak with the addition of Tuk and Kiri.

“Wait!”

“Stop!”

Wave after wave, you found yourselves eventually reaching the panicked Lo’ak, hearing his pleads for help as he tried pulling the tracker out of Payakun.

“Shit.” You whispered to yourself, climbing off Tuhi as you made an effort to get the beeping mechanism off the Tulkun. Pushing and pulling seemed to go down in vain, the group noticing the large vehicle approaching.

“Call dad.” Neteyam spoke, looking up as his brother as he tugged at the red marker. Lo’ak nodded and made the callout, noting the children he was with and the state of business.

Eventually the beeping machine was pulled off the tough skin of the Tulkun.

“Go! Go! Go! Swim away Payakun!” Lo’ak urged, hoping onto his Ilu after giving his spirit brother a few pats on the fin.

“Everyone go hide. I’ll take this and lead them away,” Neteyam spoke, holding the tracker in his hands. He nodded to you as he dove into the water with his own ilu. The rest of you guys dove down, temporarily finding security in the seaweed.

White lights seeped through the gaps of the seaweed, proving the hiding spot to be fruitless. the mechanical buzz echoed through the water as the group evaded capture. When Neteyam returned, the group had spilt up, taking seclusion in air pockets.

You found yourself with Tuk, the panicked little girl held onto you the second you made your appearance.

“Why are you alone?” You asked urgently, your voice echoing in the plant.

“I lost kiri!” Tuk responded, holding onto you arm tightly.

A sudden splash sent you and Tuk into a state of fear, a scream erupting from both of your throats.

“Tuk!” Lo’ak spoke, giving you a nod of acknowledgement. Soon another splash came, marking the arrival of Tsireya.

“It is coming!” Tsireya alerted the group, noting on the white light that glared on their legs.

“Alright!” Everyone took a deep breath before diving back into the water. You took the lead of the swimmers, ignoring the spotlight that kept you all in sight. Coming to a stop, Tsireya motioned you to swim the other way, another mechanicism making its way towards you. You nodded furiously before turning to swim in the opposite direction. Your endeavors proved to be unsuccessful, a net capturing Tsireya and Tuk. You followed suit with Lo’ak, taking out your handmade knife, trying to cut the girls free. You paused you actions as you watched two Ikarans dive into the water, swooping down to care the net airborne.

“Tuk! Tsireya!” You yelped, dangling off the side of the net, your fingers gripping onto the gaps.

“Hold on! Hold on!” Lo’ak began to hack away at the net with his knife.

“Hurry!” Tsireya called out, moving her and Tuk away from the cutting blades.

“Arrgh!” You groaned in fustration, only splitting one of the woven ropes in half. The wind that nipped at your skin came to a rest, notifying you of the ship’s presence. You felt your body jerk, the Ikaran releasing his grip on the net, leaving you all to fall to the ground. Making a quick recovery, you stood up, locking into a defense stance. Your blue knife blade was held parallel to you as you swung it bavk and froth. Lo’ak shared similar movements, his ears pinned back as he hissed.

“Put the knife down.”

“Give it up kid!”

“Come here.”

Voices of all kinds filled your ears and before you knew it you were held in a headlock by some oddly dressed Avatar. You bared you teeth over and over, attempting to free yourself by a simple act. What caught your attention was a human boy checking up on Lo’ak, perhaps you would ask him about that thing later. You winced at Tuk’s screams as the Avatar led you to a railing.

“On your knees.” He commanded, kicking the back of your knees in order to force you down. You watched helplessly as he cuffed you to the railing, the others falling helpless as they were cuffed as well.

“Are you alright Tuk?” You spoke softly over your shoulder, letting your arms go limp in the restraint. Your attention was then directed to the familiar crys, the appearance of your clan and the Sully parents left you in shock.

“Dad!” The little girl while tugging at her own restraints, a hopeful grin on her face. You and Tsireya exchanged glances, your people on the way to rescue you.

After Lo’ak’s communication device was ripped from him, a stalemate was ensued by both opponents.

“I’ve got your kids, Sully.” The leader Avatar spoke, standing infront of the line of arms.

“Tell your people to stand down.” He held a gun to Lo’ak’s head, you felt helpless against your restraints. “I will not hesitate to execute your kid.” The older Avatar gave you a mere look as you hissed at him, Lo’ak shooting you a look to stand down. Sucking up your pride, you listened to him. You knew Lo’ak probably had a better understanding of these deamwalkers. You huffed, turning your head to watch Jake make his way towards the boat.

‘Please Ewya..’ you had never begged to Ewya, not since your mother died, but now it was a time for desperate measures.

Almost as if on cue Payakun made an attack on the battleship, sending avatars and humans running amock. You eyes widened as Ewya seemingly answered your prayers.

“Payakun!” Tuk shouted, wtaching the Tulkan’s body land onto the deck with thud, destroying the ship in the process. You let out a cry for battle as your clan charged in towards the boat.

“Yes!” You yelled, raising your head towards the sky while Lo’ak focused on getting himself free.

“Come on!” He urgently pulled at the breaking rail, eager to escape confinement. Sounds of gunshots and war crys filled the air as you pulled onto the railing with Lo’ak.

“Neteyam!” Tuk alerted, watching as her older brother came to the rescue. You turned your gaze to the boy, feeling as if you were about to burst out crying at the sight of him.

“Hey guys,” he smiled, beginning to cut off the handcuffs we were put in, sending us free one by one.

“Yes!”

“Hurry up!”

“Are you alright?” Neteyam asked as he approached you, cutting the handcuffs off in a swift motion.

You opened your mouth, yet no sounds came out. Your emotions were all over the place, especially with Neteyam’s arrival, so you found yourself nodding to the Na’vi. He smiled at your efforts, raising hhis hand to ruffle your hair before returning to his self-made task.

“Oh come on, thank me little brother.” Neteyam teased as he freed Lo’ak.

“Let’s go, let’s go!” You urged, holding on to Tuk’s hand as you pushed Tsireya towards the water. You brushed your fingers against Tsireya’s arms, notifying her you were not coming. Tsireya noticed it as your signature way of saying goodbye. She turned to look at you with surprise, unable to argue with your decision.

“They have spider.” Lo’ak commented, picking up a gun as he glanced at his brother.

“Go you guys.” You gave Tuk’s hand to Tsireya as you wtached them dive into the water. Turning on your heel you crouched next to Neteyam, interested in Lo’ak mission.

“We can’t leave him!” Lo’ak concluded, leaving the pair as he began to search for “Spider”.

Neteyam exhaled, shaking his head as he turned to look at you, “Go! Get off the ship!” He commanded, standing up as he got ready to follow his brother.

“No.”

“What?”

“Teyem.” You grabbed his hand, his ears perking at the nickname, “If you fight, I fight. If you run, I run.” You affirmed, keeping your eyes locked with his own.

“(Y/N)..” He spoke softly, the world falling silent as he focused on you.

“Oel ngati kameie, Neteyam.” His jaw slightly dropped in surprise, your hand reaching up to hold it, forcing the words have a stronger meaning on you both. Neteyam nodded, an awestruck expression placed on his face as he met your hand with his.

“Let’s go.” He patted your hand and set off the follow his little brother, who he found to be watching the scene with a smirk.

“Skxawng.” He muttered underneath his breath in embarrassment as he walked past his brother, brushing shoulders. You followed suit, a small smile on your face.

The three of you found yourself climbing on the ceilings to avoid detection, Lo’ak and Neteyam watching for Spider. Soon in a charged assault, you all dropped down on a group of humans, taking them doen with ease.

“Bro!” Spider spoke, smiling after effectively de-masking a crewmate. Lo’ak returned the smile, but the reunion was cut short. Two of the Avatars began to open fire on you, bullets whizzing through the air

“Let’s get out of here!” You said pushing the boys to cover, grabbing a stray gun on the floor as you hid behind the wall.

Your ears kaid flat as you and neteyam peered out, the Avatars approaching you quickly. Being the older kids of your mini rescue squad, you and Neteyam urged the younger boys to run, Spider taking the lead as they dove into the water.

“Neteyam..” You panicked, the gunfire not ceasing.

“On the count of three we go!” He yelled, taking the gun from your hands.

“One!” You mentally prepared yourself for the run.

“Two!” You shook your shoulders as Neteyam shot back at the Avatars

“Three!” He yelled, taking your hand and leading you both to the water.

Strange. You had just prayed to Ewya yet it felt as if she was making you acknowledge the pain in your heart. The unnecessary hatred you had for her, for Ronal, hell, even your mom.

Being submerged in the water felt soothing to say the least, the adrenaline carrying you to the top as you held your chest.

“Teyem..” you voice came out as a whisper as the others celebrated, Tsireya even finding her way there to meet with the group.

You gripped onto Neteyam, feeling your body go weak as the adrenaline rush ran down, “Neteyam.” You spoke more firmly, your tight hold on Neteyam alerting him something was wrong.

“(Y/n)?” He turned around to face you as you struggled to keep your head afloat, even after holding onto the boy. The group watched as the waters turned a scarlet red, you being the source of it all.

Tsireya let out a scream of shock, immediately rushing to your side and calling her Ilu.

“She’s shot!” Lo’ak stated, rushing to hold onto Tsireya’s Ilu. Neteyam felt as if his soul had left his body, “No.. No! No!” He repeated, starting to put pressure onto your wound as you laid against his chest. You let out a scream, the feeling of your injury being touched sent you through a state of pain.

“It hurts!” Neteyam sucked in a breath as he pushed down harder, only causing you to scream more.

“You’re hurting her! Stop it!” Tsireya cried, not able to witness you being put in even more pain.

“Im sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Neteyam choked back on tears as he unwillingly put you into more pain.

Ewya was so cruel, but maybe, just maybe you deserved it. You treated Tsireya with snarky remarks, paid little to no respect to Ronal, and even your own father. You shut him out the second your mother died, so young and emotional. Why did he let you do that to him? Perhaps Ewya yearbed to teach you a lesson and the only was you could pay for your wrongdoings was meeting your great end.

The group of teenagers urged you onto a small, rocky island, the wave paying no respect to your body as it pushed you back and forth.

“Watch her head!” Neteyam repeated, still pushing onto your wound with heavy hands as you sobbed in pain. Eventually, your body was carried out of the water and laid onto the bumpy stones.

Neteyam taking his spot next to you, shouting to Lo’ak to change spots with him. Lo’ak did as told, his eyes suken in sadness as he placed pressure onto your chest. Your hands closed around his arms in an attempt to pull them off, not wanting to bear the pain. Your fruitless efforts brought tears to Lo’ak’s eyes, “I’m sorry..” He stuttered out.

Tsireya found herself by your head, she encased your head with her hands, her face torn in agony. “Ewya please!” She yelled, wiping your own tears away with her thumbs.

Your desperate pushes on Lo’ak ceased as Neteyam cried silently by your side. You sucked up the small ounce of pride you had left and spoke to no one in particular, “I want my mom!” You cried out, “Dad!” The teens watched you with sadness, “I’m sorry!” You yelled. “I’m sorry!” You closed your eyes shut, not wanting to see the pity your friends held over you.

Lo’ak , the boy who you learned to be a troublemaker, brought to tears by someone he had spent little to no time with.

Tsireya, the girl you had grown up with and sometimes given unnecessary rudeness even though she had saw you as her sister.

And Neteyam, the boy you had trained, the boy who promised to take you to his home, the boy who showed you how to love. Your eyes watered at the sight of him. This would mark the end of your journey with him, no more dances in the moonlight, quick adventures through the reef, or following him to reprimand Lo’ak.

You felt your hands reach up to touch all of them, fingers gliding against their arms, leaving streaky trails of blood. The teenagers watched your action with great sorrow, figuring this was your own, special (Y/n) goodbye. Tsireya choked, the gesture being a familiar one; whenever you would say goodbye.

Neteyam suffered in silence, your time was coming to an end and no one could help it. Ignoring the voices in his head, screaming no, he grabbed his queue. Lo’ak and Tsireya exchanged a startled look.

“Bro.” Lo’ak held his brother’s arm, stopping him from whatever he was doing. “Don’t do it.” The little brother spoke sternly, his now dry tears leaving glossy stripes upon his cheeks.

Neteyam cracked, his heavy sobs filled the air as his hold on his braid fell limp, “I want her, Lo’ak!” He choked on his tears as Tsireya watched the scene play out with woeful eyes. Spider’s hand fell onto Neteyam’s back, showing him an ounce of comfort. Neteyam reached to hold your face in his bloodly hands, taking Tsireya’s place.

“Teyam..” you muttered out, bringing your own hands against his, “I’ll be with you for eternity,” you winced, the pain practically becoming numb as you felt yourself slip. Neteyam looked down with sad eyes, his tears splashing onto your face, mixing with your own. Without thinking, The oldest Sully brother crashed his lips against yours, muffled noises coming from his mouth, unable to conceal his weeping. Only for a second did you return the gesture, you body falling limp in the teenagers hands.

“(Y/n)?” Neteyam broke the kiss, inspecting your lifeless eyes.

Tsireya screamed in realization, turning towards Lo’ak as she buried herself into his shoulder, bawling with grief. Lo’ak lifted his hands from your wounds and engulfed Tsireya in a comforting hug, painfully watching his older brother.

Neteyam felt the way your body temperature dropped, your skin growing cold on his palms. He shakily exhaled, his mouth opening as if he were to scream, byt no sound came out. Neteyam stared at your lifeless eyes, and with a blink of his own golden orbs, he pulled his bloodied thumbs over your eyelids. He felt his lips quiver into a frown as he tried to fight his cries, still wanting to be the strong older brother for Lo’ak. And despite his efforts, he felt himself cry even harder as the realization set in. He wept as he laid his forehead against yours, his own tears gliding down your face.

“I see you, (Y/N).”

                              ∘ ───♡༉─── ∘

Ewya. Everything had linked back to the all seeing god. She predicted and she chose. This time, she had chosen your unexplainable hatred to be repaid with you returning back to her.

The burial marked the ending of your life as (Y/n). Only Ewya knew where the waters would take you once your body sunk to the floor. Neteyam earning a spot in your burial next to your dad and Tsireya, pushed your body through the waters, each of you wearing parts of her signature bracelets.

The clan watched in sorrow as Neteyam choked back tears, watching your father take you down to the bottom of the Cove. You never introduced your father to Neteyam or vice versa, but the pain you both shared created a sense of comfort.

Neteyam’s cries were shown as bubbles escaped from his lips while he watched your body disappear on the seafloor. Tsireya, in a effort of comfort, gave Neteyam a side hug, which he returned only after watching your last strand of hair disappear into the glowing plants.

Essentially, everything Ewya stood for resulted in eternity. Eternal peace, eternal love, eternal forgiveness. Everything eternal lasted forever in Ewya’s eyes, and even if something proved to be gone, Ewya would find a way to wrap it up in the loop of endless beginnings.

And maybe, just maybe, that’s what you had really meant when you told Neteyam you would be with him for eternity.

[einsatzzz]

HURRAY, IT'S TIME TO TERRORIZE OTHER CHARACTERS! For now just emoji oc ask!

Minato: What is this oc most passionate about?

Hiyori: Does this oc make good or bad first impressions?

Rei: What's your favorite thing about this oc?

Shiki: How does this oc get along with people they just met?

Rosa: Around when does this oc get up in the morning?

Hi Mel!! Sorry this took a while hahaha but thank you for sending an ask for the other guardians 🥹💖 I hope you're doing well and taking care of yourself while you're busy with irl stuff!

Also, I wanted to include a colored sketch of Rei (Oniyanagi's resident red flag) because of our topic on Rei and Akina possibly being such a toxic ship together lmaoooo Anyway here are the answers to your asks!

Minato: What is this oc most passionate about?

Minato is passionate about a lot of things, which includes fighting and his own opinions. But what he's most passionate about is the desire to become the right-hand man. This is mainly fueled by wanting to be recognized by both his father and Oniyanagi 9th (the twins' dad). Very especially, Oniyanagi 9th because Minato places a lot of respect in him. Even when he's grumpy, he suddenly becomes polite when the 9th is around.

In short, he wants to kick Yui's ass. That's his top priority right now.

Hiyori: Does this oc make good or bad first impressions?

In general, as a known honor student at school and as the leader of the Health Committee, he makes quite the good first impression to most people. However, that good impression might just become a little bit tainted when he starts swearing out of frustration at the idiots that surround him on a daily basis.

Rei: What's your favorite thing about this oc?

What I love about Rei is that he's a character that craves chaos for the sake of his own personal entertainment. Of course, whatever he defines as "chaos" is also dependent on his own personal preference. He's quite the manipulative person (being able to read people skillfully) and he uses that as well to create chaos around him. This allows for a lot of fun things (from a creator pov lol) to happen in the story whenever he's around.

And as mentioned before, he is someone who is also obsessed with getting money. His comfort item is cold hard cash. Honestly, fair, money can buy happiness fr fr. It's just that his methods of getting said money is very questionable.

Lastly, he's ikemen. I love ikemen.

Shiki: How does this oc get along with people they just met?

I already answered this here!

To add more though, two of the people he didn't get along with are Minato and Hiyori (as shown in the post linked). If you don't want a discussion to end up being a loud shouting match full of swear words, don't let these three people get into a heated argument.

Rosa: Around when does this oc get up in the morning?

As the head of Ninomiya Estate's staff, her day starts very early, around 5AM. She quickly goes through her own morning routine like drinking water upon waking up, stretching, bathing, putting on her uniform and reviewing her plans/tasks for the day.

As a bonus, one of the early morning tasks that she does is to check up on Kurumi if she is already awake. But the thing is, Kurumi rarely ever wakes up early on her own. Sometimes, Kurumi looks way too cute while she's asleep!!! How can Rosa just interrupt such a beloved adorable sacred form!!! So Rosa just accidentally lets her sleep in for a liiitttle bit more and the consequences might lead to something like this.

[mamadarama]

IM SO SORRY IKEEP ACCIDNENTANLY UNFOLLOWIGN U BC THE ASK BUTTON IS NEXT TO IT 😭😭😭 i love ur content so MUCH i would NEVER unfollow on purpose omgg 😭

also anyways imjust wonderign , have u ever thought abt what would happen if yumenosaki didnt exisr inthe first place ???? like. what if they all jsut go live normal lives. or maybe if any of the major events in tthe storyline never happened. cause youre so amazing at analyzing stuff so id realllyyyyy like 2 hear ur thoughts <333 THAMKYOU!!!!! have a nice day :DD

OHH LOL OK i was like hey didnt this person follow me the other day? ive done that before too

i have thought abt that!!! i think some of them would still end up being idol adjacent? also a lot of characters grew up in the same area so they might end up going to the same school or smth anyways so theyd still know each other.

wataru is a stage/movie actor and eichi buys vip seats to all his shows until he notices him . kanata and kaoru are both marine biologists. madara is still exiled and starts traveling doing god knows what, but comes home to japan sooner than he wouldve if eichi didnt stall him during the war. in japan he continues to do god knows what. odd jobs and the like. chiaki and kanata still meet and kanata is saved from the cult. chiaki might go on to become a professional basketball player? izumi and makoto dont have a falling out bc the war never caused leo to break down, so izumi doesnt get paranoid for makotos safety. both of them along with arashi are models and leo is still a composer. arashi would also be a divorce attorney purely on the basis that i think she would be really good at it. rei retains most of his 2nd yr personality and simply mellows out a little instead of acting like an old man, and his friendship with keito wouldnt fall apart. keito is a mangaka and a teacher. hes trying to keep those identities separate but who knows how long thatll last. koga and rei still form deadmanz but keito wouldnt join. instead theyd be a duo unit until koga invites adonis to join, and this time adonis actually gets the chance to since deadmanz wont disband before koga can invite him. kaoru might join later, but its more of a hobby and his primary goal is still taking over and carrying on his mothers research. he works at kanatas aquarium. adonis is a park ranger. i think souma would be a teacher. either biology or a weapons class, or both. kuro and shu are both fashion designers but kuro would specialize in costumes and shu would do mostly high fashion lines for runways. kuro also does wrestling, he intended for it to be just a hobby but he ended up being a fan favorite so now hes better known for that than he is for his costume work. mika is shus apprentice still. hiyori is dawdling and unsure of what he wants to do, but in the meantime hes busying himself with making youtube videos (think jenna marbles). he still meets jun in school. jun is a streamer but he also has a fitness blog and works part time as a personal trainer. pretty average life but with the added bonus that he lives with hiyori, so he doesnt have to worry about money as much. nagisa is a geologist and historian. he works at a museum, thats about it. he still stayed with hiyori until he was adopted by his current family. ibara is the ceo of some company. yuzuru is toris butler still and tori is learning what he needs to do as his family's heir. tsukasa is doing the same. yuzuru and ibara dont meet again after ibara leaves the military facility. ritsu is a professional pianist, hes known for theming his performances around his vampire thing and playing creepy organ music, except on a piano. mao is a freelance photographer and a tutor. makoto continues to be a model, but also does gamedev and photography on the side. he also streams with jun and natsume and has a radio show with the rest of trickstar. anzu would still get transferred to whatever all boys school trickstar is going to, but instead of being trickstars producer shes just part of their friend group and theres no war. switch exists as a magic act, performing at events and whatnot. tsumugi also has his own fortune telling business and works as a librarian, and sora is a competitive gymnast. hajime is a botanist and works for the city managing public gardens. mitsuru became an olympic athlete. when nazuna graduated he went to college to do ...whatever it is hes doing. since there was no unit keeping them together, he was able to just stop talking to shu and they eventually drifted apart painlessly. tomoya and hokuto are actors. subaru is a solo idol. the twins street performances took off and they became a well known acrobatic duo. shinobu is a radio host and has a podcast where he talks about anime. tetora is a competitive martial artist. midori happily works as a vegetable farmer with his family.

rinne and niki live the same way they did before becoming idols, except niki has a cooking show. tsukasa secretly helps kohaku escape from his family and silently passes his allowance over to kohaku so he can live somewhere safe. as soon as he can he gets back into contact with aira. he lives alone like niki did when he was 14 and spends a lot of time in the library trying to homeschool himself. aira is still an idol fanatic but doesnt become an idol. hiiro goes to look for rinne, but rinne refuses to leave and hiiro goes home after making rinne promise hell still visit home sometimes. hiiro takes rinnes place as the next monarch. tatsumi and kaname still go to the same school but kaname never has the accident, so oremeru never abandons his identity and has no reason to hate tatsumi. tatsumi is learning to be a priest from his dad and will eventually take over as the pastor at his family's church. since es was never built on the same land as the ayase's bunker, mayoi would stay underground for longer. if he left at some point hed be a visual artist and submit his work to galleries. he probably wouldnt meet the rest of alkaloid, at least not right away.

so thats what i think would happen, more or less.

[robian]

End of Evangelion

Sorry for cursing, but what the actual fuck did I just watch. To understand this film, I basically had to read an entire essay about background information that can only be found in outside sources such as video games. I even watched a 5 minute YouTube video purely just to understand the infamous hospital scene. 

If you're confused like I was please read this:

and read:

https://imgur.com/2oRZv

Shinji at this point in the story is just absolutely fucked up in the head mentally. Both of his friends leave. Asuka is comatose. Rei is swimming in a juice bathtub. He even killed the guy that finally accepted him and even liked him. By the way apparently some people think Kawaru is a representation of Jesus who needed to be killed. Anyways, Shinji was just mentally not there. Shinji's in this shit mental state and knowing Shinji, he doesn't know how to properly express his emotions. So naturally what does he decide to do? Bust a load to Asuka's comatose body. Btw although the anime doesn't show any attraction for Asuka prior to this (except the kiss maybe and the childhood friend fantasy) apparently there's some side content that makes their relationship make a bit more sense.

I would explain the events of the story in more detail, but reddit can explain it better. Basically at the end Shinji decides he would rather live in the new destroyed world than a fantasy and the only person that we can see who also decided to stay is Asuka. Basically,Shinji chokes Asuka so he knows he's not living in some weird fantasy. Asuka caresses his cheek and calls him disgusting, letting him know that it isn't a fantasy. Basically Shinji has the craziest character development in all of anime history. Although it's hard to say if he's even alright at the end.

On one hand I think Evangelion is a masterpiece and on the other hand I think it's garbage. It's an anomaly within anime. As a story writer, if most people can't understand your story, then it's badly written. However, Evangelion reminded me of poetry. It was confusing but clearly had deeper meanings. I doubt anyone could ever COMPLETELY understand Evangelion by only watching the series&movie. It practically requires discussion between people to even grasp it. If the writers wanted to leave a lasting impression, they certainly achieved their goal.

[menofsweaters]

okay so

y'all seemed unusually chill about my last Endeavor rant, and that has lulled me into a false sense of security. General disclaimer that everyone is allowed to engage with media however they want and no one is ever obligated to like/appreciate/forgive/whatever any character and this is all fictional barbie doll playtime so who cares -

BUT

Whenever I see a lot of anti-Endeavor rants, it just screams to me that the person posting has maybe not fully internalized the idea that parents (and adult figureheads in general) are human beings who are quite fallible and capable of making terrible mistakes just like everyone else.

Most people who abuse and neglect children do not realize that they're abusing and neglecting them. I know this is a tough pill to swallow.

Heck, most people who abuse other people in general do not realize they're causing harm. We as human beings generally like to see ourselves as the main character - as a person who's making the correct choices, who knows best, who's out for the greater good.

When parents and guardians abuse and neglect their children, they're generally not thinking "I want to hurt a child," they're thinking that they need to teach the child discipline, or that the child is ungrateful, or that they're somehow doing what's right for the child and the family even if it's hurtful at the time. Or, perhaps at the same time, they're not examining their actions at all, due to lack of understanding, mental health issues, addiction, etc. Makes me think of that post that circulated about how "child abuse is inherently irrational" because YEAH. IT IS IRRATIONAL.

This all very much tracks for Endeavor, who married Rei and started having children when he was quite young, and by all accounts did not have anyone in his life to offer a good example of what a healthy, loving family looks like. We also see his descent into emotional disturbance pretty starkly when you look at the memories of Touya and Fuyumi when they're very young versus the at height of his abuse. We also don't see any other heroes of Endeavor's age who are parents in canon.

Endeavor's thoughts were always "I need to protect Touya from hurting himself, and the best way to do that is by distancing myself so he stops wanting to be a hero" and "I need to train Shouto to be as strong as possible so that he can surpass both me and All Might and become a great hero." Both of these are selfish and short-sighted to some extent, but they're not sociopathic.

He was never thinking, "I want to hurt my children and my wife." No one thinks that way. That's some family annihilator thinking, and there's no indication that Endeavor thinks this way. Very, very few people are that cartoonishly villainous in real life, and Horikoshi has made a point of showing that Endeavor is multifaceted. He only recognized his own shortcomings with his family when he was older and saw the consequences. Would it have been better if he realized these things earlier (and maybe got some damn therapy)? Yeah, of course! That would have been way better!!

Anyway, I think the point that I'm trying to make is that people seem to have this assumption that Endeavor KNEW what he was doing was wrong and did it anyway, when that's simply not what's shown in the canon and also is not realistic in terms of actual bad parenting.

Not to get too deep on main or whatever, but as a survivor (ugh) of childhood abuse, and someone who's dealt with abusive partners as an adult, letting go of the idea that abusers are fully aware of what they're doing and are purposeful with the harm that they do was a HUGE hurdle for me to overcome, but it made my life way better to accept that people are just selfish idiots who have no idea what they're doing in most cases. This doesn't mean that abusers are innocent in any way, or that they can't be held accountable for their actions, or that you have to forgive blah blah blah, but I really genuinely encourage people to reexamine the idea that abuse is always purposeful because it very much is not.

Thanks for coming to my rant, no tags because I don't want to get harassed by teenagers. This is just me spitting out my internal thoughts on the internet and I have no desire to engage in arguments about it.