#anyway I feel like educating him on asexuality would be a good thing if he really wants to under

[bitchapalooza]

Still thinking about the fact that I confuse my friend a lot apparently but like he doesn’t fully get just how much a spectrum asexuality is so I cannot blame him. But it is funny.

[xiaq]

Hi, I have a question re:sex and Christianity. Small background: I still go to church, and I still live with my parents even though I'm not much younger than you, because housing is very very expensive where I live (pretty common here, I would say about 2/3 of my friends live with their parents and we are decently privileged kids)

Anyway. How does one get over purity culture? To be clear, I've never been told in church not to have sex, I've never gotten the gendered lessons that you got. But I am terrified of having sex. My first real, multi-year relationship just ended and while there was hand stuff etc, there was never any p in v sex (lol I feel 12). But I still had insane anxiety about being pregnant despite being on bc. And I think its because I know my parents would be so disappointed if I had sex. And if I was pregnant I could imagine all the gossip. And honestly I think im from a pretty open church, b/c one of our previous ministers kids recently got married at 8 months pregnant and lots of church people were at the wedding and supportive and her parents were there and everything.

I dont even think I particularly like sex, i might be on the ace spectrum, but how do I remove it from all the anxiety that's tied to it so I can even give myself the chance to find out???

(Asking because it seems like you've been pretty open about purity culture/removing yourself from it)

CW for sex talk (again)

How does one get over purity culture?

Oh man. That really is the million-dollar question, huh? Obviously, I can only answer re my personal experiences, and this is something you should talk to a therapist about, but I can tell you how I’ve tackled it with my therapist at least.

Purity culture is, at its core, an ideology that is perpetuated by shame. If you’re indoctrinated into purity culture when you’re a kid, the concepts become baked into the way you construct your identity, your perception of self, and your perception of your sexuality. It’s practically intrinsic, by the time you’re an adult, to feel shame any time you’re reminded you have a body, much less a sexuality.

According to the chapels I sat through every week as a kid, a girl's body could be 3 things: an intentional stumbling block for men, an accidental stumbling block for men, or unnoticeable. Women were to strive for the third option so as to keep their (and their male friends/authority figures) purity intact. After all, if a boy, or even your male teacher, had impure thoughts about you, it was your fault for tempting them (which, holy shit. I still can’t believe that was a thing I bought into for so long. If my 45 yr old grown-ass teacher had impure thoughts because he could see my 12 yr old collarbone, that sure as hell wasn’t my fault. But I digress.) The Only time a woman’s body can be something else, is when she gives it to her husband, at which point she must suddenly flip the switch in her brain that she is now allowed to be a Sexual Being and she must perform Sexual Duties despite living in outright fear of her own body and sexuality for years (decades?) up until this point. Jesus take the wheel.

Purity culture isn’t a thing you can just decide to walk away from if you’ve grown up in it. Because its ideology is insidious and internalized. So first you need to submit to the fact that you’re going to be fucked up about sex. It sounds like you’re there. Second, you need to interrogate what you believe. If you’re leaving religion behind entirely, you’ll approach removing yourself from purity culture differently than if you still identify as a Christian. It sounds like you might be the latter, which meant, for me, separating what’s actually biblical and what’s shitty, contrived, doctrine that I was told is biblical but is actually more political than spiritual. This helps you address the shame issue.

You need to throw away I Kissed Dating Goodbye and Lady in Waiting and all those ridiculous books you read and reread in the hopes of somehow obtaining impossible marriage perfection and look into actual scripture interpreted within its historical context. I could write a book on this, but the TL;DR is that the text of the Bible was written, translated, curated, and changed multiple times over thousands of years by human beings with human biases and, often, personal and/or political agendas. It contradicts itself! Reading it as it is—a flawed historical document—rather than some sort of God-breathed perfect document—is incredibly freeing. When you do, you’ll probably realize that purity culture is bullshit on a spiritual level. Which is a good start, if that matters to you. Because any time you start to feel shame or guilt you can ask yourself: does God actually care if I wear a bikini or touch a dick I’m not married to? Probably not. Wear the bikini. Touch the dick.

The most important therapy session for me was when my therapist asked what I would do if I got to heaven and God was actually the God I’d been raised to fear. What would I do if he condemned me for being bisexual and having premarital sex and becoming educated, for arguing with men, and failing to isolate while menstruating, and wearing mixed fabrics? If Montero had come out at the point, I probably would have said I’d pole dance down to hell. Instead, I said I would spit on heaven’s gates. If a god that cruel and that pointlessly demeaning really exists—a god who would create in me condemned desire—I won't worship him. The good news is, I’m 99% sure he doesn’t exist. At the very least, he isn’t supported by scripture.

Okay. The final thing you need to do is figure out what you actually want, sexually speaking. This bit is probably the hardest. I’m still in the early stages of this myself. You say: “I dont even think I particularly like sex, i might be on the ace spectrum, but how do I remove it from all the anxiety that's tied to it so I can even give myself the chance to find out???” Bro, I wish I had an easy answer for you. For me, whenever I’m feeling anxious about Sex Things, I tell myself: 1. My God does not equate my worth to my sexual habits. 2. My partner does not equate my worth to my sexual habits. 3. I do not equate my worth to my sexual habits. It seems silly, but reminding myself of those three things is massively helpful. If, after I’ve sorted through those, I’m still anxious or uncomfortable, I stop doing the thing. I evaluate. Am I overwhelmed and I need to try again some other time? Do I just not like the thing? Sometimes it’s hard to tell. Sometimes you change your mind. Sometimes you just don’t know. That’s why having a partner who you trust and who’s willing to patiently explore your interests (and respect your disinterests) is so important. Half the battle, for me, was having a partner who told me they’d be ok with no sex at all. Because that took the pressure off me. If the bare minimum they need is nothing, then anything more than that is a bonus! Hooray! This is maybe TMI, but let me tell you. I thought I was asexual* right up until I was able to have moderately non-anxious sex. Never in my life did I think I would initiate a sexual situation but… I do now. It’s a fun thing to do with a person I love and, holy shit. I am furious that I nearly missed out on it.

Finally, re birth control: I don’t know how you can approach that fear in a way that works for you. If you don’t want to ever have penetrative sex, that’s fine! If that’s a point of anxiety you can’t get rid of, then don't push yourself to do it. If you find out you like other sex things, do the other sex things! If you don't like doing any sex things, don't do any sex things! Also, have you considered sleeping with people who can’t get you pregnant? Always an option if it’s an option you want to consider. ;)

Okay. I hope this was even a little bit helpful. Sorry if it’s a little convoluted, I typed it up in bursts during my work breaks.

*This is not at all to say that asexuality can be “fixed." Rather, it’s to say that things like purity culture can drastically confuse your sexuality in general. If you’re asexual, then this process is still important to discover what you like/dislike. Then you can be explicit about those necesities and find a partner who’s a good fit (if you want a partner at all, that is).

[paintedkinzy-88]

Ok, since we're almost halfway through Pride Month, I feel like I should ask this: what are your sexuality headcanons for the Sans AUs, and how do you think they would act at a Pride Parade? Anyways, have fun, and Happy Pride Month!

Ahhhh I hate that it’s already almost done and I’ve done nOTHING. I was going to draw something, but we’ll see if I have time to before the end of the month. ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

But but but I can do this much. Probably. XD

I’m only gonna do the main AUs cuz that’s a long list as it is, so apologies but I’m not adding like Razz or Sci or anything dhsjbfjsbd. But anyway since I know this will get long I’m cutting it off here. If you want my Pride Rambles heckin take them:

Going off a semi-peaceful multiverse of course, cuz I like everyone kinda getting along—

Classic: personally always seen him as Bisexual, but more leaning towards a masculine attraction. So like a 4-5 on the Kinsey Scale huehue. Honestly don’t think he’d go to a Pride Parade unless someone dragged him there cbsjfbjsnf, so he’s probably just lazing around/being carried the whole way, and wearing a million Pride accessories cuz his friends/brother just keep piling them on while he’s sleeping lmfao

Red: Mostly the same as Classic, tbh. Though he’d probably be picking a lot of fights with anti-protestors outside the parade ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Blue: Pan, he likes anyone and everyone! As long as you meet his taco standards, gender plays no role. He’s definitely the energetic, supportive one at Pride that’s trying to make sure everyone feels happy and involved. He’s usually at the front of the parade, but also weaving through the crowd a lot. Someone says their family doesn’t support them?? Blue’s there to make you feel welcomed and valid no matter what. (ง’̀-‘́)ง

Lust: Demiromantic, Pansexual, and maybe Genderqueer. As in, he usually goes by he/him but doesn’t mind other pronouns, and will typically dress more feminine or masculine depending on however he feels. If he looks good, he looks good, gender expectations be damned. And I just think sexual attraction is one thing (kinda an important thing for his world, too), but being romantically attracted is rare. ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ He be the one that’s always friendly-flirting at Pride, and complementing absolutely everyone. He’s totally dressed up with flare, but still stylish and in the colors of one of his flags huehue.

Ink: I go back and forth with Ink a little?? I kinda go by partial canon, seeing him as Asexual and Biromantic, but he’s not sex repulsed. I feel like with him making so many worlds and so many Lust variants, it’s more of a “yes this person is aesthetically sexy” rather than any actual feeling attached to it. XD He goes to Pride in a l l the colors. He’s probably passing out face paint and confetti poppers and other Very Messy Things too. Maybe he’s even painting people’s faces himself before the parade, honestly.

Error: Maybe Demiromantic, but otherwise boi be like Classic, just more grumpy and prone to anger. XD Idk if he’d really want to go to a Pride Parade, because of the crowds, but I suppose if he was he’d likely be in the waaaay back where no one else is, just people watching, maybe enjoying seeing a partner having fun themself and that’s it. … Or he’s on the sides of the parade threatening anti-protestors too, that’s probably a thing.

Dream: HMMMM thinking long and hard about the Dreamtale duo ngl. I just felt like they don’t really. Care about gender or anything at all, and probably didn’t have any of this in their village. I guess I can see Dream as questioning, but leaning towards Pan??? He’s probably been to so many Pride Parades though, let’s be honest. Soaking in the positivity and doing his best to cheer up anyone who’s scared or uncertain in themselves. I can see him educating himself in all the stuff he missed out on so he could lend semi accurate advice to anyone still questioning themselves. He be the therapist wherever he goes smh, but I’m sure there’s been multiple occasions that his friends have pulled him into the festivities as well. I can definitely see Lust and Ink making him dress up a bit. XD mayhaps…. 👀👀

Nightmare: mostly the same as Dream, but he’s had a lot more time to think it over. Idk, I’ve always seen him as Demiromantic, and then just not caring about gender at all. It’s the one thing he always respects in others because he just doesn’t understand mortals’ obsession with gender roles. He’s a murderer, but he’s a murderer that will get your pronouns right. He likely only goes to Prides because his boys go, lmao. He’ll do whatever they wanna do at the parade, within reason. That means no, he will not get his face painted, but they’re definitely able to throw some rainbow accessories and shit on him, even if he’s not happy about it. XD Gonna be washing the rainbow glitter out of his goop for MONTHS…

Cross: He be Bi, just like canon huehue. I’ve also been reading a lot of Trans Masculine fics lately, and I can see that. Idk if I’d ever outwardly mention it in a story, since I don’t personally know much about that kind of experience and don’t want to represent it wrong, but hey if you wanna see it in my fics go right ahead, I’m not against that at all! Cross probably swapped out his cape for a bisexual flag at Pride lmao, but he’s mostly there to accompany friends and/or partners, so he’s not super social with others unless they come up to him. A good guard against creeps though!

Horror: I was going to say Bi, but honestly, nah I think he’d be Gay. I just don’t see him being very interested in girls at all??? Femininity is fine, just not girls. He’s the big burly scary guy at Pride, I feel like he’d be getting a lot of attention he doesn’t know what to do with wheeeze. Might have also brought cupcakes or cookies tbh. Gotta make sure everyone isn’t skipping lunch and passing out during the parade.

Killer: Definitely Gay. The gayest of them all and he’s not ashamed of it. He’s probably causing a lot of chaos and arguments with anti-protestors or just general creeps, mostly cuz he finds their reactions funny. Otherwise he’s a flirty bastard and probably hanging off of Cross and/or Nightmare most of the day. Idk if he’d be wearing much flag/color wise, but he’s definitely trying to put stuff all over everyone else.

Dust: I’ve always seen Dust the most Classic like, so he’s Bisexual too for sure. He’s likely right beside Killer in causing chaos and threatening assholes, but he’s also staying by Horror so the big guy isn’t overwhelmed in the crowd. I’ll bet that Killer convinced him to make little poppers and actual fireworks, too wheeeze. Used safely, of course. Mostly. Probably. Sort of.

Fresh: AroAce. I just don’t see him as very interested in having partners honestly?? Doesn’t mean I haven’t liked some Fresh ships, but for the most part he’s chill being single in my AUs lmfao. Fresh probably brought so many things to the parade. He’s got huge rainbow flag that the crowd can carry over the top of them, a bunch of glow sticks for necklaces/bracelets, balloons, wigs, light up glasses, flags galore, anything and everything, all of questionable origin ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Honestly, I’m not usually a fan of having an entire group of characters identify under LGBT, because it’s not very realistic to me. Not that I’m against the people that do, of course! Do what you want, I don’t care. It’s just not how I roll ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿

But, all the Sans AUs are based on one dude, so it kinda makes sense that they’d all reflect him in some way, some more than others. And since I’ve always seen him as Bi/Pan, ya bet a lotta the AUs are kinda the same wheeeze. There are a lot of UT characters I see as straight, Sans just isn’t usually one of them ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Maybe that’s just me projecting onto my fav, but whatever, it’s fictional characters, why the heck not.

ANYWAY these are just my headcanons. It’s not usually a thing I pay much attention to, especially when reading other’s fics. I feel like it’s really up to interpretation most of the time, and that’s one of my favorite parts of fandoms XD

[slashingdisneypasta]

Could you do a headcanon about the villain's SO that's Asexual(someone who is disgusted by sex/doesn't want to have sexual intimacy. However, some asexual individuals partake in sex for personal reasons, like for their partner while others don't at all). How would they react? Would they even care? And I was thinking for the villains that it could be Captain Hook, Dr. Facilier, Hades, Ratigan, Beetlejuice, and maybe Bill Cipher? Thank you! I love reading these!!! Your work is so good!! 💛💜

Course! Hope you likes these! ^^ Thank youuuuu, I’m so glad you’ve enjoyed some of this blog so far! 

~~~

Beetlejuice:

·         Well damn, that’s a bummer.

·         I’m sorry for him! But BJ is one hypersexual little shit. Of course, he’s not going to leave you or anything because if he just wanted sex then he’d go back to that brothel- he also likes your reactions to his horrible jokes, and your horrible jokes, and your very presence.

·         So, I mean, the ‘You’re not interested in sex’ thing is a bummer for him, but it’s not the end-all be-all of the relationship for him. Not for someone as old (And as acquainted with his right hand. Not to mention his powers) as he is.

·         If you’re still willing to have sex with him, though, be prepared to see a very ecstatic ghost!

Bill Cipher: I... kind of headcanon him as ace also? I think? I mean, he’s a triangle. He’s not disgusted by it, and he can certainly use it to his advantage, but its like ‘Yeah nah no thanks. Colossal Cosmic Power though pls?’

Captain Hook:

·         I mean, even in a relationship with someone who wants and likes sex, Hook isn’t that interested in sex. He’s spent so many years on Neverland, a place that’s run by children, that sex has been put on such a backburner for so long that fantasies and desires have sort of... become… unimportant? Well, far less important than, like, getting his revenge, keeping good form, and now, you. Sex hasn’t really been a thing for him, so it’s not a big deal at all for him at all that even now that he has a partner, he won’t be having relations like that (Unless you’re okay with it. But even then- he might not be).

·         When you tell him that you’re asexual, its just like ah ‘Ah. Oh well.’ Kinda moment. He is curious about your sexual identity (Because of course he knows n o t h i n g apart from ‘Straight’, ‘Gay’, and those rare party animals’ that’ll hit ‘either’ gender. Good grief, please educate him) though so I hope you’re ready to talk about it! It might actually feel good to have someone just, genuinely curious about you. Not as a way to ‘debunk’ you identity at all- just because he’s he thinks it’s interesting.  

·         He accepts you wholeheartedly. You know, he would say, I thinks one of me pirates is like that too! Smee, maybe? Whatever, I don’t ask about the men’s personal lives.

·         You will feel completely accepted and understood on the Jolly Roger!

Dr Facilier:

·         I tend to headcanon Dr Facilier as having ‘been around’, you know? Like, he’s been to all sorts of underground clubs and casinos in the French Quarter that he’s met everyone. Gays, bisexuals, men who are women on the inside, women who are men on the inside, people who throw gender to the wind entirely, couples made of more than 2 people, etc. And you are certainly not the first soul he’s met that isn’t interested in carnal relations.

·         Basically, with him, its like dating any gen z- he doesn’t care about losing out on sex! He accepts you and just wants you to feel safe and comfortable being yourself around him.

·         As long as he still gets to cuddle you (LOTS) and give you all-over-the-face kisses, (Meaning: Worship you) he’s happy XD Just lots of non-sexual affection.

·         Lots… and lots… of affection. He’s obsessed with it, really. Physical and verbal.

Hades:

·         Hades is a God- the fact that asexual individuals exist is not a surprise to him in the slightest like it is with a lotta other Disney Villains. Its like ‘Righty then’ and you move on with your day.

·         Hades is not as hypersexual as his flirting may sometimes imply (He is most c e r t a i n l y not at Beetlejuice’s level, anyway)- he’s far more invested in his desires to take over Olympus and that is more at risk of destroying your relationship then the lack of sex in it.

·         If you are willing to do it with him, though, he’ll be careful and slow and will stop with ease the moment you decide you want it to stop where it is.

Professor Ratigan:

·         Ratigan is a man of science- and that includes psychology, as well.

·         He quickly realises that if you two want kids and you don’t want to have sex with him to do it (If you have a functioning female reproductive system), then there’s always adoption, or other a number of other choices. Or you might not want children at all.

·         He also understands that different minds (And libidos) work differently and the fact that yours doesn’t want sex is neither a personal choice on your part, or a fault in any way. This is one of those times in Ratigans life that he realises how stupid the rest of the population is compared to his own genius criminal mind- how can anyone not understand this? Imbeciles.

·         He didn’t fall in love with your ass anyway, so no worries.

[hag-rambling-on]

Boys hc’s feats Diaspro

Riven

Riven Cassios was born to two Omega prisoners. What surprised everyone, because staying healthy enough to carry out a pregnancy on a planet that sucks your magic is... Obviously the Rocalucce Council keeps an eye on the planet, they took him out of there because no child would pay because his parents, and he has been in foster homes, although it doesn't last long since the requirements for his adoption were more strict than most -which in the long run the Council would realize was COUNTERPRODUCTIVE for his character-. That is what Darcy detects and why the high spheres are somewhat "permissive" with him.

His mother died giving birth, it was already miraculous that she lived so long and ‘bout his father I think I'm going to kill him too, maybe. The father I assure you would be love him (he called Riven to himself Daru, his gift) thought was not his initial idea, the mother always saw him as an experiment (she was a witch who followed the Ancenstresses). Ohm, also in his blood there are dark elves and giants.

Riven surname is actually the name of the galaxy where he was born or a derivation of it, as is common for orphans. So the boy knows NOTHING about the above.

Timmy and Riven are the only specialists who have passed the full course at Fonterossa, without skips. In the end they bond about it. Timmy gives him a recommendation to work as a part-time mechanic at Magix (good boy face, he knows how to use it)

Timmy

Timeus “tshhhh, it’s Timmy.... i’m not my grandfather” fulfills the physique requisits as much as any other specialist, but it is true that his physique and abilities, adapted to the distance, give him a more "feline" air.

He is also the one who wakes up at night and moves silently, scaringthe rest of the squad if they wake up unexpectedly.

His glasses are for both sight and Aura Vision. His parents are rich enough to pay for an operation, but since he would have to wear glasses for his ability anyway, why? Practical guy.

And the glasses make people look down on him, something that when his self-esteem is high and he’s being rational and cunning he knows it’s wonderful, although many others times may hurt. He is mostly leprechaum with something human.

Nex

Nex is still a Paladin born in Lymphea and with blood of literally ALL races. He adapts well to any planet, although not its people at first. His race mix makes his face “charismatic”, like always draw attention even if people don’t know very well why they are draw.

His ability is Delay Sleep. It allows him to hold over his need to sleep for days without going crazy or losing physical capacity or needing many days to recover (he can stay awake for 5 or more days, sleep 8-10 hours and go back to being his usual self). Sometimes he does not control this well and has plenty of energy in need of drop but he is the one who has the most control of his ability.

One of his parents spent time in Rocalucce Fortress as a "guest" so at times he feels like he has something to prove.

Roy

Coming from Andros, most of the population are merpeople with a few elves and humans. which avoids the 100% aquatic population. Roy, unlike Aisha is mostly human-elf with a bit of merpeople in a grandgrandgrand level. One of his parents comes from one of the colonies on the moons of Andros and he was born there although they moved almost immediately.

Roy’s paladin ability being the canon “Triton Aura” used to breathe underwater. That and learning to swim and drive all kinds of water vehicles was what made him feel "adapted" to Andros. But he always try to be useful.

He only became a Paladin at the beginning of season 6, and it was visiting him that the season began. He’s bi but he thinks of himself as straight.

Nabu

I plead guilty to liking Nabu even though I shipped Aisha with Flora and Nex. So I have a hard time thinking about him. Except, EVERY time I try to think of something. EVERY TIME. Rapunzel. So, he will never cut his hair.

But with an island instead of a tower and a babysitter (male and wizard) more dumbledoor (not, actually more like Newt Scamander mentor like).

Sometimes he misses out on some "social customs/things/normalcies" whatever is called due to his little dealing with people. He may seem naive or that don't understand sarcasm. He understands and learns quickly, but people were very respectful to him and there are things he is not used to. 1/2 merpeople 1/4 half elf 1/4 human as both of his parents are half merpeople.

He likes to swim as much as any merpeople, but they didn't let him do it much because they were afraid he would go away or lost, so he usually went off "to the heights", going up to the rooftops and things like that.

Helia

Helia is trans but keeps his first name as chosen name which I don’t understand. Also he has formally tried study practically everything he wanted. Specialist, Paladin, Wizard (of Threads). Painter.

He can't make up his mind, his family hurries him just to STOP making them dizzy and spend a few years with everything -and actually end a single “major” choice- he wants to experience, that he has a very long life and can dedicate a few decades to Everything and they can support them. Well, more or less, but he was vip pass to all these options because family connections.

Long story about Sky, Brandon and Dia.

Sky, Brandon and Diaspro's first meeting was a show. Has it all. Costumes, lies. Confusion. Kidnapping. And that is why Diaspro insists on the wedding (I would like to mention that although I don’t know her romantic orientation yet surely bi or lesbian, here, Dia is asexual. And Sky is non-binary but his parents do not approve so go for he/him to avoid problem with them. And here our story begins)

A bit of background. Brandon actually hails from Isis, the son of the military and was chosen by the whimsical chibi!Diaspro as a playmate and future personal guard (because then she believed that touching children gave "lice" and her character and age did not have the 18like wall of royal education, then in a random encounter he called her among many things what Dia's mind translated in a strange way "uncracked geode", which is a double-edged compliment in Isis that many would not accept from strangers but she liked it). Rarely they would end up becoming friends in the end. When the series begins, Brandon and Diaspro keep up with calls, which will prevent Dia's reaction with Bloom on the one hand.

On a visit (officially only from the kings of Erakyon to to the kings of Isis) for the children to get to know each other, somehow, they all ended up happily dressing up, with Sky and Dia looking like two pretty princesses and Brandon assessing whether his dress would be green or yellow because Diaspro insisted that she and Sky had already taken the blue and red and so it would be more "thematic".

Here began the first of many attacks on Sky's head, because before it had begun to be rumored (true) that Erendor had fertility problems (btw his race dwarf-high elf and Samara is leprechaum-high elf, Sky gots mostly high elf part). When they came in and saw two girls and a boy, Brandon, not the highest IQ, but one of the wisest of his team and definitely the best fighter, played along so he ended up pretending to be Sky (also helps that his hair colors looks like Erendor) Everything worked out well in the end, although Brandon ended up as Sky's squire (better for him, worse for Diaspro), and Diaspro made Sky promise that he owed her a big favor. Anyway they grew up over the years in friendship and they both knew they were not of each other's true love interest, but, they could put up with each other (because that's what royalty does).

Sky and Diaspro have a sonorous (affectionate) war over Sky's hair to annoy/exasperate Brandon. Diaspro always complains that he doesn't grow it and it would look great then. Sky says that he is fine as with his hair at it is (it's actually Erendor's thing). The soft part of Diaspro that she doesn't usually show off has taught Sky many ways to style his hair and subtly put on makeup to look more feminine if he wants to.

How I am amused by that image from wikipedia and that Diaspro entered Sky's guard so quickly. Another headcanon is that Diaspro would sometimes change her appearance a bit and go into Sky's guard to be with Brandon to annoy him and Sky, when Brandon has to talk about her without giving details, she is simply "his sister Charbonne" (she hates that alias). They were discovered when she was 15 years old but she had already trained and the royal families considered it a sign to formalize the engagement since “they search each other” (people only sees what they wants).

The Diaspro family is not good, first Brandon was a shield (emotional) because as a child they were not “that” bad and then Sky joined him (physically and politically), handling things with Bloom so like that was not a good idea when the floor was full of cracked bottles.

... omg i’m sorry you three i’m sorry what I did to you

Also, Brandon's ability as a green user is very interesting and helps with this a lot. I temporally call it “Keypoint Warning” and I like it a lot, it's like a "tic" that tells him "be careful, what you say, what you do now, even the smallest thing could change everything for youself (for better or for worse)”. He actually has a scar on his forehead (not a lightning bolt) that his hairstyle hides after “that” day but a little less fine on the words and the kidnappers might have broken his mouth so... His parents have been cured (spoiler: no) of heart attack since then.

[takonei]

Aro-ace B!Gonta and B!Tenko, Agender B!Gonta, and Demi-sexual Maki and Kaede? I noticed that none of them really get talked about for some reason which makes me sad! They're still good characters!

Ah, the return of the big headcanon wave- though I really appreciate the love for those characters, thanks a lot! :D

Aroace Gonta: 10/10

I said it before and I say it again. Aroace headcanons are always big brained. And now that I think about it, I should have given a better grade to aroace Kokichi, perhaps a 9?

Anyway, aroace Gonta is something I totally vibe with. I don’t think it would take him long to put a name on his orientation? While he does not go on the internet too much nor has anyone to educate him on lgbt+ stuff, he just lived his life normally and then maybe someone in the cast talks to him about it.

After being told aromantism/asexuality is a thing, he does feel a bit at ease knowing it’s perfectly fine, though I don’t think things would change much for him.

Overall, big brain, anon.

Aroace Tenko: 9/10

It’s still very good, and definitely a headcanon I can imagine for her!

I don’t really think she would be affected too much by the ‘WhEn ThE bOyFrIeNd’ remarks, after all she can just slam them to the ground if she wants to, sooo yea. Who needs sex and all that shit when you can get fucking ripped lmao

I didn’t exactly ship Tenko with anyone in this AU (though I would gladly see what some of yall have in stock), so I don’t have anything against it.

Agender Gonta: 8/10

I know I say that a lot, but I also vibe with this one, in a way?

As I said in the aroace Gonta HC, I don’t think Gonta would think much of their gender identity until someone points out that non-binary identities are a thing.

I do think it would take some time for Gonta to figure themselves out since they’re rather quiet and doesn’t like to talk about themselves much, but the headcanon is more than valid.

Overall, I do like it.

Demisexual Kaede: 10/10

The fantasy writer sweetheart? Demisexual? It’s more likely than you think. ;)

No seriously, I 100% vibe with the headcanon because I always vibe with aspec headcanons in general. I do think it would take some time for Kaede to fully apprehend her sexuality. Perhaps at first she would think she is fully ace as she never got many friends/lovers.

And after meeting Maki she realizes it might be more complicated than that, and the two could figure it out together.

Very sweet!

Demisexual Maki: 9.5/10

I don’t have any real reasons not to give Maki a 10, maybe it’s just that I vibe more with demi!Kaede and wanted to reflect it.

I do think Maki would realize she likes girls more than boys, but at the same time, she is not sure since she doesn’t feel that attracted to either of them. Perhaps she would know she is not entirely ace but would only figure herself out after meeting Kaede.

I don’t know how you imagined it, anon, but whatever you did, I know it’s great.

Suggest a Beta AU pride HC and I’ll judge it!

[writingandmore]

Hello! Would it be alright if I request a matchup? I honestly can’t tell if it’s open or not so hopefully it is, but if I was wrong I’m sorry about that! I would prefer Genshin, Danganronpa, or any Fire Emblem (out of the three I know Awakening and Fates—I’m less familiar with Echoes but its still perfectly fine!) but you can really do whatever you’d like, I don’t mind. :) Worst case scenario if it’s something else then I may look into it and get a new interest, so be free lol- Anyway I an INFP and a Libra (even though I’m not entirely sure what that means, and I have absolutely no idea what the numbers with the w is so I can’t tell you that sorry ^^;). I’m asexual but prefer guys and identify as she/her. I’m somewhere in the 5’8-5’10 range but nobody is quite sure where, it changes every time I try to measure my height somehow- I have long brown hair, brown eyes, and glasses and I am extremely pale. I have been described by the people I know as funny, smart, and nice, and I’m very shy around new people, since I have a hard time with trusting, but once I’m comfortable to a certain extent I’m very loud. My sense of humor is either complete nonsense or extremely dark so not many people get it, but I really dislike being serious so I’m almost always joking, but I can be serious if I think I have to. I also hate people who can’t understand extremely basic things no matter how many times you try to explain it, as well as people touching me, however I can tolerate it if I really like the person but my limit is a hug. I prefer to stay inside and enjoy playing video games, drawing, and listening to music, and I like to sing but never in front of people. I also have a tendency to deny everything in a panic while trying to escape when embarrassed or uncomfortable. Beyond that I can’t think of much else to say, so hopefully it isn’t too long and I did it right, I have no idea what I’m doing lol. Anyway have a nice day! :)

- Albedo would appreciate a partner who is intelligent and kind-he often struggles with relaying his emotions to others sometimes, so a partner who would be patient and helpful when that happens would be really nice. He's not shy, and quite talkative about his interests, so hopefully you'd be comfortable listening to his ramblings until you feel confident enough to add to the conversation regularly. He really wouldn't mind you being loud either, unless he was working on research.

Danganronpa: Kokichi!

-Kokichi loves to joke around and is rarely serious himself, so an s/o like you who could match him in that would be great for him! He wouldn't mind your dark humor either-he often gets reprimanded for taking his own jokes or pranks too far, so he really wouldn't do the same to you unless it was a really serious misstep.

FE: Leo!

- Leo is very much the same way when it comes to being frustrated when people don't pick up on things right away, so he'd understand your feelings well. He considers himself a pretty educated and intelligent person, so an s/o like you who could match him in that would be a good choice, as you typically wouldn't get frustrated with each other. He'd also do his best to be respectful about touch-he's got quite a good memory, so he most likely wouldn't forget often, if at all.

[mikauzoran]

Marichat: Serendipity: Fifty Marichat and Adrienette Kisses: Kiss Forty-Seven

Read it on AO3: Serendipity: Fifty Marichat and Adrienette Kisses: ...out of spite.

“Could you hand me the coriander, please?” Marinette requested as she measured out the cumin and added it to the pan.

She and Chat Noir were making an early dinner together and would be joined by Tom and Sabine once they’d finished tidying up the bakery after closing time. Marinette, however, was unusually quiet and seemed distracted…and Chat was pretty sure he knew why.

Earlier that day, she and Adrien had snuck off together for one of their storage closet trysts. She was ready to take things further physically, but he hadn’t gotten around to explaining the whole asexual thing yet because he was pretty sure that the quickest way to get a horny partner to break up with you was to confess that sex really grossed you out, so it probably wouldn’t be a thing that happened very often, even though you were willing to try for their sake.

So Adrien had turned down Marinette’s advances and instead tried to get her to go on a date with him that Saturday to see a fashion exhibition. She’d refused, citing her relationship status as the reason why she couldn’t go on a date with Adrien.

Adrien had called her out on being a bad friend to him lately, and he could tell how much it stung her.

Part of him hated to hurt her, but the ugly part of him really was feeling used and neglected and wanted the source of his pain to suffer too.

He knew deep down that Marinette wasn’t just physically using Adrien. They’d been friends for years, and she had always been the sweetest, most devoted ally and confidant. She always stood up for him, was always thoughtful and kind and supportive. He knew that a couple months of bad choices and heated makeout sessions hadn’t erased everything they’d ever meant to one another over the years.

But it still hurt to feel rejected by the one person whom he expected to be on his side no matter what.

It wasn’t just that she didn’t want to hang out with Adrien alone because she didn’t want to be tempted to stick her tongue down his throat. It was her not letting Chat Noir reveal his identity, her unwittingly keeping them from being everything Adrien had ever dreamed about having in a relationship.

Most of the time he was able to logically sort through his feelings and be reasonable, but, in that moment, he didn’t feel like taking the high road and being a good person. He was hurting, and he just wanted to be petty.

“So, how was school today?” he inquired conversationally, handing Marinette the coriander and taking the cumin to screw its lid back on.

“It was okay,” she replied distractedly as she attempted to level off the teaspoon. “How was yours?”

“Educational,” he answered lightly. “Science was interesting…. Did you do anything fun on lunch break?”

Marinette dropped the measuring spoon into the pan and, cursing, fished it out with a spatula. “Uh…lunch was…fine. I mean…I hung out with a friend.”

She focused very intently on moving the spices around in the pan with the onions and garlic so that they were well mixed. “How about you? Did you have a nice lunch?”

“Not really,” he confessed with a sigh, leaning back against the counter. “I’m having a rough time with one of my friends. She and I had a fight today.”

Marinette looked up from the stove to give him a soft, compassionate look that almost made it impossible for him to stay mad at her. “Oh, no. I’m so sorry, Minou. Do you think you guys will make up? Was it a bad fight?”

He averted his gaze, pretending to study the spice containers on the countertop. “We kind of already made up. On the surface level, anyway. She probably thinks we’re relatively okay right now. She knows we still have a problem, but I don’t think she actually gets how hurt I still am.”

Marinette’s face crumpled in empathy. “I’m so sorry, Chat Noir,” she cooed, resting a gentle hand on his elbow. “I know how much it sucks when the people you care about don’t see how much you’re hurting. I’m sorry your friend doesn’t seem to get it.”

He immediately felt like a bad person for trying to guilt trip her. Here she was listening to him talk about his problems like no one else in his life besides Nino, Luka, and Plagg bothered to do, sympathizing with him and giving him the attention he yearned for, and…

He pointed to the pan. “You might want to stir that. The onions are getting a little burnt.”

“Oh!” She snapped back to the task at hand. “Thanks. Sorry.”

“No,” he sighed. “Thank you. For everything. You’re really great, Marinette.”

She winced as his words went through her like a knife between her ribs.

“I’m not that great,” she mumbled, and he found that her guilt brought him no pleasure.

A silence fell between them as Marinette continued to sauté the onions and garlic.

“…Maybe you should tell her,” she suggested almost a minute later.

“Hm?” Chat tipped his head to the side. “Sorry?”

“Your friend,” she clarified. “You should tell your friend how much whatever your fight was about is still bothering you. She cares about you, right?”

“Very much,” he confirmed, knowing it was true. Even if her present treatment of Adrien didn’t reflect it, Adrien had always been an important friend to Marinette.

“Then she would want to know that she’s hurting you,” she reasoned. “Tell her and give her a chance to fix it.”

“You’re so good,” he chuckled self-deprecatingly.

She turned to cock an eyebrow at him.

He shook his head. “And here I was just planning on being all pouty and passive aggressive.”

She sighed, giving his bell a playful tap. “That’s not going to solve your problem, Minou. It’s not even going to make you feel better.”

“I know,” he grumbled, carding a hand through his hair, repeating resignedly, “…I know.”

She smiled softly, reaching up to scratch behind his ear. “Good boy.”

He leaned in, stealing a quick kiss, humming, “Good girl.”

She looked away, pretending to concentrate on cooking as she muttered, “Not that good.”

“Hey,” he sighed, slipping behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist. “Don’t be so down on yourself. No matter what your shortcomings, you’re still an amazing person, Marinette.”

“Sorry,” she mumbled, adding the tomato sauce and kidney beans to the pan, stirring them in. “Thanks. I just…don’t really feel like a good person lately. I’ve been letting others and myself down a lot.”

“Wanna talk about it?” he offered softly, ghosting a kiss to the back of her neck.

She shook her head. “Sorry.”

He deflated, resting his forehead against the back of her head. “No, it’s okay. You don’t have to tell me,” he hurriedly assured. “I just want you to know that you can…that I’m here for you, no matter what…. So, whatever it is, you can tell me.”

She turned in his arms, looping her own around his shoulders as she whispered a tearful, “Thanks…. And sorry.”

“Shh,” he comforted, wiping away her tears. “There’s nothing to be sorry for.”

Suddenly, making Marinette feel guilty was backfiring hard, and he felt sick at seeing her suffering.

“I’m sorry,” he stressed, pulling her in close, nuzzling her hair and pressing butterfly kisses to her ear, cheek, jaw, lips. “I’m sorry.”

Her arms tightened around him, and she hid her face in his neck, whimpering barely audible apologies.

[juiceboxesheadcanons]

Yo your headcanons are very poggers, do you think you could do headcanons for the adultrio with an ace s/o? Just in case you don't know, ace in this case means asexual so basically doesn't experience sexual attraction :3 Sorry if your not comfy with that, I didn't see anything about it in the rules so why not ask y'know

YESSSS I CAN!! And you can request anything that’s not against the rules!! I don’t get uncomfortable by literally anything, I just set boundaries for illegal things! THANKS SO MUCH FOR REQUESTING!!! 😁🧃 (and for the poggers it made me smile ngl)

Adult trio with a asexual s/o~

a/n: headcanon count: 30 | this does contain things about sexual intercourse and being asexual, so if you’re against the lgbtqia+ community fuck off and go to hell, but if you’re uncomfortable with this topic just scroll and you’re valid! 🥰🧃

Chrollo

🧃 he doesn’t actually mind much (stan him)

🧃 he isn’t that into sex or anything of that sort to the point he won’t date you because of it

🧃 he probably will read more about it so that he can understand more about what this is and why you feel this way about intercourse.

🧃 if he saw anybody making you uncomfortable by saying sexual things, quick kill +10 points 😁

🧃 the troupe and you wouldn’t be an issue because let’s be honest a couple of them are probably ace as well

🧃I feel like he’s either in a relationship for the benefits of information or a persons personality. He isn’t a player who just wants sex so it’s fine it’s good!

🧃 he wouldn’t treat you any differently from anybody else such as treating you like a innocent baby (shoyo hinata in every mf haikyuu texting video) and he wouldn’t just be straight out “bro why don’t you like sex?? I could change your mind!”

🧃 might hang up a ace flag or two and if he had time go to a pride event but unlikely because of his schedule 

🧃 nobody will invalidate you when he’s around, he would kill them like a fly

🧃 you being ace never will affect the relationship and he loves you just as much as if you did enjoy and feel sexual ❤

Illumi

🧃 like chrollo he doesn’t even mind, probably doesn’t even know what asexual means at this point because you know, uneducated mf

🧃 I feel like Illumi could be asexual, but then again he is married to hisoka so not quite sure?

🧃 he has to look up what it is because growing up in a “kill, money, life is war” household they didn’t bother teaching him about sexuality and his mom is probably a homophobe. silva probably isn’t tho because I feel he’s the one who approved of the hisoka x illumi ship in the first place

🧃 when he finds out what asexual means after 48 websites, and 92 computers he just is like “oh, that’s nice.” idk what else could he say? He probably never was the person anybody would come out too like that bc yk the DEATH stare-

🧃 if he saw somebody making you uncomfortable he wouldn’t kill them cause he sees it has a waste of energy but threaten them to the point oh hell nah they just finna jump off a cliff afterwards 

🧃 but if somebody invalidates you it’s a different story. “come on y/n, I’ll handle them. just go wait in the car.” 

🧃 that person never saw the light of day again. fly low I guess🥰

🧃 he wouldn’t really care if you were ace cause yk he isn’t a giant fan of doing “it” such as others. I mean he thinks it’s nice but he doesn’t just NEED it

🧃 he honestly thinks you’re great if you enjoy intercourse or not

🧃 but still is confused about what asexual is :’)

Hisoka

🧃 okay he’ll be the most difficult out of the 3 to understand you.

🧃 he doesn’t understand at all. It’s great how couldn’t you couldn’t feel or enjoy it at all?? He loves it so how could somebody else just not like it?

🧃 probably will think you’re just in denial until he doesn’t anymore. He’ll think you’re just stubborn until he tries something and you genuinely get upset.

🧃 this is depressing to him but he realizes that you’re not just a toy instead you’re his s/o. He messes up every now and then sometimes, he’s just gonna need some practice at this.

🧃 when he realizes you’re serious he will never try anything on you but if he lets something slip out he’ll probably just apologize and shut up

🧃 he’d hang some ace flags around and would celebrate pride with you, he thinks it’s nice because he is canonly pansexual so you guys could relate in one link, and he probably went to pride every now and then but he goes more often if you were to be comfortable going because anything for “his darling~”

🧃 if anybody invalidates you just like chrollo, quick easy kill (oh she passed away? aww, aww alright anyways yall want some mcdonalds? 🤷🏽‍♀️)

🧃 honestly be grateful that you don’t have to explain what ace is to him because I feel he’s educated on all topics like this, not like he had a family to educate him (fuck yo homie dead 😜) he just felt it was important 

🧃 this would throw him off a small bit but he still loves you just as if you weren’t ace

🧃 this is gonna be a challenge but he’ll get the hand of it soon :)

Okay that is it! sorry if it seems to typical but I am not part of the community myself and tried to research as much as I could for it to seem realistic ✨ ANYWAYS THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR REQUESTING!!! SEND IN MORE REQUESTS GUYS I LOVE THEM 😁🧃

[ultravioletsoul]

Virgo Shaka x Reader - N/S/F/W Alphabet

Oh dear lawd, I’ve always found it a little (ok, terribly) difficult to imagine Shaka of all people in a romantic relationship. Out of the twelve gold saints, he’s probably the least likely to be in one. It was already too much effort for my brain to picture him holding hands with anyone, let alone expressing any interest in doing the do, but here I am… writing an adult post about him. 

I need to clarify that these headcanons are about Shaka post the Twelve Houses story arc. Honestly, he would have zero interest in anyone before that since he was a little of an arrogant and vain jerk or, if he did, he would be too proud to admit it because how can a god-like figure like him feel that way?? Ludicrous!

Anyways, yes, after the fight with Ikki (what an absolute mad lad that guy is, bless him), Shaka would be more open to the idea of a romantic relationship but I still feel it’d happen under some special circumstances. And he’s going to be a peculiar boyfriend.

This is a very belated birthday gift for an amazing friend because she loves Shaka, ever since I dragged her into Saint Seiya hell ♥♥. Forgive me if it’s terrible *le cri* 

Warnings: Sexual content. Possible OoC. Unbetaed. I have no idea how this happened. 

                                                             *  *  *

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex): 

Despite his serene appearance, how collected he acts around others, and the way he carefully reins in his emotions to the point he may come off as cold and detached, Shaka can be surprisingly caring and soft with you after an intimate session between the sheets.

Considering he would only do it with someone he deeply cares about and that it’s not a decision he’d take lightly (people just assumed he was asexual until they learned about you and then were confused as heck), you have to mean a lot to him.

So of course he wants to share the warm afterglow of lovemaking with you, lying together in complete bliss.

He may not be very talkative afterwards, but don’t take it as a sign he is troubled or displeased about something. Your most recent experience is still sinking in his mind and he’s not used to feeling so many strong emotions at once.

Little actions such as playing with your hair, kissing your forehead, letting you snuggle against him, or draping a protective arm around you to bring you closer, are ways in which he would show his affection.

He’d also like to make sure you’re both clean and refreshed before a good night’s rest so don’t be upset if he scoops you up in his arms and takes you straight for a warm bath. 

Just let him pamper you while he’s in the mood for some touching and cuddling ;)

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

Not actually a favorite part of his body, but he likes it when you gently run your fingers or place feathery kisses across his abdomen. If you tease him and “innocently” draw closer to his cock, he’s going to have hard time resisting you (no pun intended :v) and may turn the tables on you.

Shaka loves everything about you but his favorite part of your body would be your eyes because of the beauty of soul he sees in them. 

As a saint who fights to for Athena and justice, he knows there is evil in this world but you are a lotus flower growing in the mud. And it’s because of people like you why the goddess he serves believes humanity is worth saving.

He can easily get lost in them when he’s making love. It’s one of the few times he wouldn’t want to close his eyes and he would gently encourage you not to break eye contact either. He loves gazing into the depths of your soul as you both reach new heights of pleasure in each other’s arms.

Nothing but that moment with you matters to him. When you’re two alone in that room, you’re the only deity he worships in mind, body and soul.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically):

Sorry to break it to you guys, but Shaka wouldn’t do cum play or anything of the like.

He’d actually be weirded out if you even suggested the idea to him, and he wouldn’t understand what’s so attractive or exciting about it.

He’s a guy who has always been meticulous and methodical in everything he does given the teachings he’s received from his mentor (the Buddha :o). As someone who has engaged in lots of meditation to clear his mind from fears and doubts, personal hygiene and cleanliness are important to him, so he would prefer to keep the mess to a minimum if possible. So no, he isn’t in a hurry to see you doing stuff with his semen.

Shaka likes coming inside you. It’s the only place he ever wants to be when he makes love to you.

It’s a wonderful, intimate moment and he would hold you tightly against him as your souls mesh together into a single being.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

It has never interested him before but, after starting a relationship with you, out of curiosity, he might have read some texts on the subject of erotic love. It was for science, tho!

Now now, of course he isn’t oblivious to the intimate affairs of couples, and nobody has to explain to him how babies are made. You can rest assured Shaka knows perfectly well how sex works. 

He wants to be a better partner for you but, for all his knowledge and wisdom, he’s aware he’s not exactly the most versed man in such matters. 

Despite this, Shaka adamantly refuses to ask anyone for advice, so you bet he’s gonna do the research on his own. He can figure this out.

Shaka would keep it classy, however. Nothing pornographic or vulgar is acceptable. That’s not how he wants to treat you.

Shaka’s approach is purely analytical and educational, and he reads it all with a straight face. The others would never guess what he’s actually up to.

It’s a serious matter for him. He wants to make sure he’s got what it takes to make you happy not only on a physical but emotional level as well.

In the past, the thought of sex wouldn’t have even fazed him. Shaka cared very little about it and honestly he didn’t see what the appeal was.

He still doesn’t much care but when it comes to you, he’s not against the idea. 

Fine, he digs it.

But he’s a little embarrassed to admit it.

As someone who has trained to let go of his attachment for sensual pleasures and desires, it baffled him a little that the thought even crossed his mind.

That hasn’t stopped his curiosity for learning more about how to please you.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?):

Shaka is a virgin. Don’t @ me. 

That’s the real source of his power. Geddit? *fingers guns*

On a more serious note, it is no surprise that he’s not very experienced.

It’s not that he thinks sex is something dirty or bad per se. He just never had the time or any interest in the pursuit of such trivialities. Lust and sexual craving are not traps he would fall prey to. He devotes himself completely to his duty as a saint of Athena, and so he avoids distractions that would hinder the fulfillment of his mission.

You’d most likely get to be the first sexual experience he’s ever had and it’s no simple feat to seduce the man who’s closest to being a god. He believed himself to be above such worldly affairs until he met you and boy…

He was wrong once again.

Finding ecstasy in your arms is nothing short of divine.

Shaka would take his time to be intimate with you, though. He doesn’t do casual sex and needs to be absolutely certain of your feelings for each other first.

However, don’t let his virginal status fool you. He has made his research beforehand (see letter D), he has prepared and knows where to go.

If he doesn’t get it right the first time he’ll try again and again until he has you writhing in pleasure. His own satisfaction is secondary to yours.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying):

Lotus. I’m sorry for being so cliché OMG.

Pic (NSFW)

He spends a lot of time in this position when he meditates, so don’t be surprised if at some point he wants you to sit on his crossed legs and ride him.

Shaka would enjoy the intimacy and closeness this position provides. 

It’s not a position that allows for frenzied love-making, but that’s precisely why he likes it so much.

Buried deep inside your wet core, he can feel your heart beating against his chest in unison with his as he holds you in his protective embrace, and there’s nowhere else he would rather be.

He loves it when you shower small kisses on his face and happily surrender yourself to him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.): 

The first times, Shaka would wear a serious expression because he’s concentrating on learning what you like, what makes you tick and curl your toes.

He’s studying you not just on a physical level. Intimacy is beyond simple carnal pleasure for Shaka. It’s a matter of spiritual connection.

He’ll get more playful and cocky (no pun intended) once he learns how to push your buttons.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.):

He doesn’t have a lot of body hair and always keeps his face clean, shaven and moisturized.

His nails are well trimmed. His hair nicely brushed and scented. His body devoid of bad smells. 

That being said, he’s not very hairy downstairs (he’s got mostly a patch of soft blond hair), but he keeps things well groomed. Shaka doesn’t like sloppiness.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect):

It’s gentle lovemaking with Shaka and nothing less.

However, he can get too caught up in the details and in delivering a good performance that it may be a little difficult for him to really get lost in the moment.

He’s too worried about being perfect and bringing you pleasure that he sometimes forgets about the most romantic aspects.

Reassuring him he’s doing a good job will put his mind at ease. Be appreciative of his efforts and give him your undivided attention.

He’ll be the most doting lover ever because sharing his bed and body with you are very special to him.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon):

Shaka has an unbelievable control over his sexual urges and, even if he’s in a relationship with you, that wouldn’t change a lot.

He doesn’t usually masturbate, even when he’s been deprived of your touch for long periods of time (which would be when he’s away on missions for the Sanctuary). He can handle it no problem.

That doesn’t mean you’re not on his mind. Shaka always thinks about you with the deepest love and respect.

Masturbating can never compare to the bliss he feels when you’re in his arms. It’s just empty pleasure and would leave him even more frustrated, aching for you.

He would rather show you how much he loves you and missed you the next time he gets to see you.

Mutual masturbation is something he wouldn’t mind doing, if given the chance.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks):

In all honesty, Shaka is not overly kinky and he’s perfectly content with vanilla sex.

However, he lowkey enjoys being dominated so if you flip him on his back and mount him, he’ll find it a nice game changer.

Ride that boy, seriously. He gets off on being a bottom and the sight of you enjoying yourself so much would drive him to the edge.

Tease him all you want, deny him release or keep him from touching you, he’ll endure it like a good boy.

But if you think you can run the show for too long, get ready because Shaka will get his due.

You’ll have to learn you can’t play dirty and expect him to show you mercy.

Bad girls like you deserve divine punishment  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

L = Location (favorite places to do the do):

He’s a bit old-fashioned, so he prefers the privacy and quiet of his own bedroom. Discretion is Shaka’s middle name.

It’s very practical and convenient too.

There’s no better place than his bed: clean, fresh, comfortable and quiet. He can relax and get in the mood without worrying about anything else.

He also won’t mind doing it on the floor, provided it’s pristine and there’s a plush mat with lots of cushions on it.

If he’s in your place, your bed and environment have to be clean and neat or else he’s not going to feel up for any sexy times.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going):

As someone who spends a lot of time inside his head, he needs a stimulating conversation to get him going.

It doesn’t even have to be sexual. You could ask him about his life as a saint or engage him in some philosophical talk. He’ll be happy to share his knowledge with you and will be interested in what you have to say.

Stroke his ego a little but don’t make it obvious.

On the other hand, witty banter turns him on, too. He’s got a sharp sense of humor but if you can turn around his jokes and roast him, leaving him speechless, he’ll want to get even through other means.

And you can imagine how  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Shaka loves foreplay. The more foreplay you have, the more aroused he’ll be. He can spend hours just kissing, cuddling and touching.

A nice bath with him can also get him in the mood. He’ll feel more comfortable if you’re both clean and fresh. It doesn’t matter if you’re about to get dirty again.

If during foreplay or sex you whisper sweet nothings in his ear and praise him, that’s a sure way to turn him on. Praise that boy if he’s doing an amazing job, he’ll try to do it even better.

On the other hand, don’t be shy to tell him if something isn’t working for you. He’ll know if you’re faking it and that will kill his inspiration. He’ll start doubting himself.

He likes it when you talk dirty to him, even if your words make him blush, but refrain from being vulgar. He will find it in bad taste.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs):

Anything that involves humiliation or degradation of you or himself.

Any weird kinks.

Don’t ask him to get into hard-core BDSM. He won’t do it.

Edgeplay. Anything that would hurt you is a big no for him. He loves you too much and wouldn’t bear the thought of bringing any harm upon you even if it’s consensual.

He won’t do it in public places.

Poor hygiene will definitely turn him off.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.):

He may not be very keen on the idea of oral sex at first, whether it’s giving or receiving. Poor bb is still shy even if he doesn’t want to look like it.

But he may be open-minded about it once he gets more experience with you.

He’ll get there with gentle guiding and reassurance, but don’t rush him if he isn’t ready yet. Let him go at his own pace.

Once he gets past his initial shyness, he’ll be more confident to go down on you.

He won’t mind receiving but he prefers not coming in your mouth or any other part of your body.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.):

Let’s be honest. Shaka doesn’t fuck. Ever. He’s not gonna rip off your clothes or manhandle you or use you like his plaything. That’s not his style.

Don’t get the wrong idea. Despite his cool exterior, he’s still a passionate man. It’s just that his passion burns slower than most.

He will take his time to make sure everything’s perfect so you both can take delight in the experience.

His mindset is one of enjoying the build up and the journey rather than desperately rushing to his destination.

He wants to relish in every kiss, every caress and every sound of pleasure you make, he wants to feel all of you— to reach into your soul.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.):

Quickies aren’t his thing. Shaka’s sex life isn’t very spontaneous, so suggesting him to pull off a fast one isn’t going to appeal to him.

He can control his urges and expects you to do the same. He can wait until a more appropriate time for intimacy.

Shaka needs preparation to have sex. He wants to be in the right state of mind, he needs to plan the details of that special night with anticipation, he doesn’t want to leave anything to chance or else he’ll find it difficult to be at ease.

Let him have it his way, it’ll be worth it.

Conversely, you can teach him how to be less uptight and not to fret over being flawless.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.): 

Shaka is game to experimenting as long as you talk about it beforehand, but don’t expect him to go outside his comfort zone. It’s a feat in itself that you even managed to get him laid.

He prefers sticking to what works for you both, so keep in mind he’s not very adventurous. 

But he’ll do his best to please you and will be open to suggestions on how to spicy things up in the bedroom.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?): 

It may not look like it but Shaka has a surprising amount of stamina.

Though he’s a bit slow to warm up, his passion will burn longer.

He won’t tire out easily but if you’re exhausted already he’ll let you rest. If you want to go another round, he’ll be happy to oblige.

He can last for a very long time without releasing inside you, but he’s also learned to have orgasms without ejaculating.

All that meditation and self control stuff? Well, turns out it’s helped him have a wonderful sex life with you :v

Bae can keep going all night long. You’ll sooner get exhausted before he does.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?):

He doesn’t own any toys. The only toys he knows are the ones kids use to play.

Blindfolds and restraints are okay. He’ll use them on you if that’s what you want.

He still prefers simple, intimate, vanilla sex. Less is more for him.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Shaka can be a big tease when he wants to so don’t expect him to be very merciful if you provoke him.

He loves it when you beg him like a god tho.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.): 

He’s not very loud. Shaka is always restrained about how vocal he is, but you’ll definitely hear him grunt and sigh and moan often.

He prefers listening to the sweet sounds you make.

Once he’s close to an orgasm, he can get noisier and will try to muffle his moans by biting his lips or kissing you.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character): 

At times when tending to his garden in the house of Virgo, he’s thought about making love to you under the night sky and among the flowers he’s cultivated.

Your hair covered in petals as the light of the universe shines in your eyes is a sight he wants to see in this life.

Though maybe he’ll never have the chance to tell you.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes):

Ideal size. Not too big, not too small. Proportional to the rest of this body. 

He’s got a pretty cock, honestly. Its texture is silky and when he’s hard it turns a rosy color. 

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?):

Shaka’s sex drive isn’t very high actually and, if it’s up to him, he won’t have sex very often. He’s for quality before quantity.

You may start wondering when was the last time you even had intimacy.

Don’t be surprised if it’s been 84 years.

He might as well look at the calendar and think “we haven’t done it in a while, next week may be a good time to get it on”.

His training taught him not to grow attached to his desires and he’s tremendously disciplined at that.

It doesn’t mean he doesn’t have sexual desires. He just doesn’t let them control him and is not animalistic about them.

Sex isn’t the most important aspect to have a fulfilling relationship. It’s just the icing on the cake, so to speak.

What truly matters is the emotional bond you two have forged. 

You’re not an object for him.

He can live happily without any kind of sexual intimacy if that’s what you want. He won’t love you any less for it and you’ll never hear complaints or reproaches from him.

Shaka doesn’t feel guilty about wanting to make love to you. Just don’t expect him to be a sex beast ready to pounce on you any time. That won’t happen.

Shaka would have no problem if you have a higher sex drive than he does. He’ll strive to make you happy. 

If you take the initiative and try to get in his pants, as long as he’s in a private and comfortable environment where he can let go, he’ll give in. Otherwise forget it.

Plan ahead if you intend to get naughty with him. Shaka will appreciate the thoughtfulness.

Just don’t take advantage of him because as much as he enjoys sleeping with you, he’ll quickly get bored if all you think about is undressing him when you’re with him.

Don’t reduce him to a sex object for your personal gratification, he won’t be comfortable with it. Respect and love him like he does with you. 

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards): 

Shaka doesn’t fall asleep immediately.

He likes cuddling after making love.

He may have his eyes closed but he’s still awake and he’s listening to your every breath, your heart beating, he’s basking in the warmth of your gentle and blissful cosmos.

He can’t believe he has the most wonderful person in the world by his side.

Even if you both know it may not last, that the next holy war approaches fast and he’ll have to fight, you’ve made peace with it. You accept what the future holds in store for both.

However, that thought still keeps him awake at night.

But he’ll never tell you. He’ll just kiss your forehead and stroke your hair until you’re fast asleep.

                                                          * * *

Well, that’s it. I can’t believe I did this. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed (?

[recklessrex]

Rexy's Cats OCs Part 4: Jellicle Allies...

Jellicallies!

(Honestly I don't really need the pronunciation guide for these ones because they're just normal names but I'll include it anyway for consistency's sake)

Ezekiel

(eh-ZEE-kee-el) An old acquaintance of Taro's and one of Munk's teachers at the training grounds. A veteran fighter with extensive battle scars

Gruff, sharp, and strong-willed

Also surprising mellow

Big people watcher

Like it's his favorite hobby, just chill and watch the world

Keen and vigilant

Introspective

But not afraid to speak his mind either

Knows how to use weapons, but only does so against enemies that are also armed

"Claws against machetes ain't exactly fair"

Carries one of those snap-out collapsible batons that police use as a quickly deployed, easily concealed emergency weapon

Also very skilled with a staff and can make use of stuff like brooms in a pinch if cornered by a machete wielding madman for example

Yes he taught Munk these things too

Typically very casual in speech

Not always very good at talking about emotions

Cares more than he lets on, or admits to himself

Would rather not care but can't help it

Will risk his life to save yours, scold you for getting yourself in this mess, and then continue on as if nothing happened

Invariably calls Munk "Kit" even when they meet again years later and Munk's an adult

Cares very much for Munk as well as Alonzo and Cass (other students of his) even though he'd rather not "get attached"

Munk, Lonz, and Cass in turn look up to him, respect him, and care about him more than he feels he deserves he'd like to be cared for

Used to be on good terms with Taro, though they met rarely and only when Taro was traveling on ahem "important protector business"

Has increasingly lost respect for Taro over the years

No he's not Yaji's favorite teacher

Asexual/Straight romantic

About Skimble's age, give or take

Average height, athletic

Short, unkempt fur

Calico, white and black with orange blotches including an orange patch over his right eye/ear and crossing over his nose, black over the rest of his head, white chin and neck… and so on

Odd-eyed, the left eye is orange, the right is blue

Lots of scars, including a few noticable ones on the face

Most notably he lost his left ear to a machete weilding madman during the same event that killed Cety's family and Arbutus

Not quite deaf in that ear, but sound on that side is now severely muffled and distant, and pinpointing the direction of sound is much more difficult

Nickname: Zeke

Herman

(HERM-an) A sly, independent young Cat that helps the Jellicles when they arrive at the Isle of Storms (more on that in a future post)

Cool, clever, and resourceful

Like for real, he's Mr Resourceful

Calls himself a "Resource Acquisitions Agent"

Gets shit you need

In return for other shit that maybe he needs or that another "client" needs

Obfuscates obliviousness and nonchalance to hide his keen interest in pretty much everything

Legitimately a chill dude

But has an agenda

What's his agenda? I'm not telling (:

Cares far more than he wants people to realize, but isn't in denial about it like Zeke

Separated from his parents in pre-adolescence, has been taking care of himself ever since

Lives alone in a small tent on a 5 meter square fenced in plot of land

No you can't come in

Well, you can hang out in the garden, but stay out of the tent

Has stuff going on he doesn't want you to see

Lacking in education due to growing up in a severely isolated community with banned heavily controlled "limited" internet access

Dude seriously had never heard of Auschwitz and Munk had to explain it to him

Also limited on his pop-culture knowledge

He's learning

Everyone knows who he is but very few people really know him

Seems to be able to come and go from anywhere, locked doors and fences be damned

Like is he magic? *shrug* maybe, maybe not. I'm not telling C:

Will suddenly appear in your camp to trade you three cans of soup for your warm jacket, then immediately go trade the jacket to someone else for a working desk lamp, then trade the lamp for…

Lol for real tho. Will come through for you. Just be patient and considerate (and have something to offer), and he'll get you anything

Be a jackass and he might decide to leave you to your own devices or maybe swindle you ah um er not give you a bargain discount yeah

Was very interested in the Jellicles, and particularly Munk, from the first day they arrived, for reasons he's keeping to himself thanks very much

No not like that. He doesn't do that. Like literally the one thing he has no interest in whatsoever

Ace/Aro

About Misto's age

Slim and kinda shortish

Soft short fur

Solid grey

Teal-green eyes

Very mild surfer-dude accent left over from his early childhood in southwest California

Nickname: Herm or Hermie but prefers Herman thanks very much. Also called "The Ghost" because he's grey and not at all because of the aforementioned ability to come and go as he pleases he doesn't know what you're talking about bruh he just came through the front like a normal person you dudes are crazy

Some notes

My feelings on male calicos in the Cats universe here

The "event" I keep talking about was on a global scale, Zeke wasn't associated with the Jellicles at that time, aside from occasionally encountering Taro. More on that event coming up in a future post if I can ever get it banged out

There's a lot about Herman that I know, but I don't want to reveal until I actually get around to writing this story

Also Herman isn't my only ace or aro character, just the first one where it's come up in context while writing these bios, idk why I didn't think to list sexuality/romantic orientation before…

brb editing previous bios real quick

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5 Part 6

[imaginebeatles]

hey, I hope this isn't too personal that it makes uncomfortable,but I'm kind of starting to learn about my sexuality and knowing that you're asexual I was just wondering how you figured it out, u know that ur asexual, and this might be the stupidest/longest question you've aver got but like if you fell in love with someone does things change and how did you deal with it?

No! It doesn’t make me uncomfortable at all. I know how tough it can be trying to figure things out and having someone tell about their own experiences can really help. This answer may end up being a little rambly (figuring stuff out was confusing for me and took years). This answer is long, so I hope it’ll help you. 

If you have any questions, message me. I don’t mind talking about it :) 

Basically, I never really questioned my sexuality at first. I grew up in a very open-minded household (my mum’s bisexual herself) and I always figured that I’d fall in love with whoever I fell in love with. If it was a girl, then it was a girl. If it was a guy, it was a guy. I never really experienced sexual feelings towards anyone, but I did like the idea of romance and intimacy (still do) so I figured it would come later when I met the right person. Sex was always taught to me by my parents and school as a natural thing that everyone will engage in and that you’ll start feeling those desires when you’re older. For me, I thought sex was weird (the idea of actually doing it or people actually having done it kinda seemed very weird to me), but it still interested me and I liked reading smut fics and having private me time ;) 

When I had my first serious crush at 16/17 however, things got... complicated. He was a friend of mine from school and we began hanging out more during a school trip to America, at which point I began to slowly realise I kinda fancied him. However, even though I wanted to hang out with him and be with him and touch him (hold hands, etc.) and kiss him, I never thought about him in a sexual way (I tried once but had to stop after five seconds because... no). At that point, I had started to learn more about lgbt+ stuff (although my country is accepting, they can do a lot better in terms of education. basically all our sex ed was about heterosexual sex with one a few lose comments along the lines of “sometimes girls like girls and guys like guys” but nothing more in depth than that. The joke was mainly that you didn’t have to worry about getting pregnant.) 

Nothing ever happened between me and the guy (we went on a double date once and flirted a little, but we were both too shy to do anything, and right now I’m kinda glad, seeing as I didn’t know I was asexual yet and having a romantic relationship would have made that whole thing so much more difficult), but it got me to question my sexuality, especially because I realised that even though I liked girls and thought they were beautiful and had strange feelings sometimes, I never wanted to have sex with them, but neither did I want to have sex with guys, making me question if I was bi again (which I am) (also, at this point, people kinda started thinking I was gay (friends and family), so that got me thinking too). 

At this point, I knew about the asexual label, but I didn’t fully understand it (there was a lot of ace discourse happening back then, which didn’t help at all with making me feel like I was experiencing a normal thing). Having always been taught sex=love=sex, I thought that if you were ace you couldn’t have a relationship with anyone and would never be able to love anyone. I really did not want to be asexual, not wanting to die alone. Now, I know this is, of course, complete bullshit, but I was still figuring stuff out. I did find the gray ace label at that point, which offered me a bit more freedom, so I adopted that privately when I started university two years later, though I never came out to anyone. 

At uni I came into contact with other lgbt+ people and we had a lot more academic discussions about gender and sexuality too, which made me question a lot of stuff again. I did more research on both gray ace and asexuality, and got more confident with the gray-ace label. On a holiday to London with one of my closest friends, I came out to them, and we talked and while she didn’t understand it, it did help me think about it more. That was the summer before my third year of university, which I would spend abroad in Edinburgh. Before leaving, I did more research on asexuality and got a more thorough understanding, and finally realised that maybe asexual described me better, so I adopted that label for my exchange year. There, I also didn’t come out, but I did more research and used the label privately for myself for half a year, before I finally came out to @chut-je-dors when I was certain it fitted me. I talked with her about asexuality and she kinda understood. That’s when I fully realised and accepted I was asexual.

Coming home that summer, I told my mum, who started to learn more about it too and then my step-dad. Then, last spring I accepted I was bi too, and that’s kinda where I’m at right now. I’m “out” in the sense that if anyone were to ask about my love life or sexuality, I would tell them, but because I’m generally quite private, I haven’t really told anyone else yet. 

I’m sorry if this was rambly and i don’t know if any of what I told you will help in anyway, but basically, for me, it was a relatively long journey. I was lucky to grow up in an accepting environment, but still the lack of information and the negativity around asexuality really did not help me accept myself. I still struggle with it sometimes, but now I do like being asexual. I wouldn’t want to change it. It’s just who I am and I don’t miss it. 

I did a lot of research on the internet (AVEN is a great resource, as well as youtube videos), and talked about it with people who I could trust, even if they didn’t know anything about asexuality themselves. But yeah, I really didn’t know I was asexual until I was 21 and even then, I didn’t fully accept myself completely until quite recently at 22/23. University was especially a struggle at times, because of certain courses I took where this kinda stuff around my sexuality came up, but it forced me to really look within myself and analyse myself and listen to what exactly i wanted, both in a relationship and sexually. 

The important thing to keep in mind is that asexuality is a broad umbrella term and everyone’s experiences are different. People’s attitudes to sex are different, as well as if they still want a romantic relationship (I do, though I only experience romantic feelings for someone I have an emotional connection with) or not. Also, some things that you may be taught are sexual, aren’t necessarily that. I’m a very sensual person when it comes to romantic relationships and I love intimacy and closeness and touching, but actual sex is a big no for me (though I’m open for negotiations, as I may have forms of sex to satisfy my partner and for closeness with them, but it’s about intimacy, not sex. I can get it through other ways too). This means that my experience of sex is different from others, even if the act itself is similar. Lots of ace people also have kinks for example, but it’s about emotional trust and connection (or something else), rather than sex itself. 

In terms of romantic relationships... I’ve only ever really wanted to date one guy and I didn’t. However, being in love didn’t change anything for me. I still liked him romantically, and I still see people who I fancy romantically or sensually or aesthetically. It’s just that I don’t want to have sex with them. However, as I’m quite neutral about sex, I’d be able to negotiate something with my partner if they want, but this depends on the partner as well as personal boundaries, which differ from person to person. Also, I didn’t really feel like dating anyone until last summer, because that’s when I figured out what kind of relationship I want. Now that I know who I am and what I want, i’m more comfortable putting myself out there and getting a romantic partner. 

Asexuality can be rather frustrating when it comes to dating, however. It makes it a bit more complicated, because you have to be sure you’re compatible in bed as well. That doesn’t mean you can only date ace people when you’re ace, but it requires good communication. However, anyone should probably have good communication with their partners, so to a certain degree, I’d say it’s better because it forced you to do this. The important thing is to know what you want and what your boundaries are. But really, in terms of feelings towards another person, it’s not that different. I just don’t want to have sex with them, but I still want to be with them and do all the other stuff couples do. Sex is not a requirement for a good and healthy relationship :) 

Aside from this, I had some very ace moments of walking with my friends in the streets and not noticing cute guys, because it’s not what I’m thinking about, or feeling weird when people bring up their crushes or sex life, because it seems so foreign and strange. Sometimes the idea that people actually have sex is still a bit weird to me. I just don’t have that desire with other people. 

Anyway, I hope this someone helped you, at least a little bit. If you wanna talk more, please don’t be afraid to message me. Figuring out your sexuality can be lonely and I sure wish I had someone to talk about it back when I was first questioning myself. Just take your time and don’t worry too much. Stuff will make sense eventually. 

[cantskank]

i think i’m having to accept that tma is just not the fan space for me.  i enjoy it now, but the only reason i got into was for the ace rep.  i’m not a fan of horror OR scripted podcasts (like i am neutral to actively dislike them pretty much).  i was not expecting it to be a romance.  not to be the grouchy aro but i thought getting into a horror podcast would be like “safe” for not having romance.  and i really like the pairing actually!  and like literally everyone else i project so heavily onto martin.  my relationship with romance in fiction is usually like- i like the part where they’re falling in love/getting together.  then the actual relationship itself is...like dicey at best for me (in terms of enjoyment).  it depends how it is portrayed really- sometimes i get it, and a lot of times it just seems so unappealing.  and like now is not the best time for either of them so i don’t really...get it.  honestly it just feels like they’re getting on each other’s nerves but are still together?  idk why that aggravates me- i acknowledge this isn’t a rational way to feel about this fictional relationship.

ANYWAYS.  idk i guess i hoped getting into tma that i would really relate to jon’s experience.  but we don’t even get his experience!  we find out secondhand, and it’s not even clear what we find out- so much so that it took someone asking a question and the creator’s response to clear it up.  even then, it was some “HE might not think of it that way but that’s what it is i guess” which is some straight BULLSHIT (pardon the pun).  i just wanna state for the record that that is WEAKSAUCE FUCKING REPRESENTATION.  at least don’t be so much of a coward that we can barely tell you’re trying to out him as ace (without him knowing) and then skirt the issue

and i don’t think he really got how important ace rep is so i maybe can’t fault him for that but...it sucks.  at least like...educate yourself on ways it might be good to portray aces in media.  again, though, my expectations are a me problem.  i just think that like we don’t have enough extant ace rep to like...casually make a character that misses the mark in those ways.  like yeah there’s a vast wealth of ace experiences and there are tons of aces who would probably not be like super ready to accept that they are ace!  like i’m basically not out at ALL irl and so i get it!  but at least like you could maybe not make that one of the few ace characters we have to represent us?  ace rep is not at that point yet!  we need characters that are open and unashamed to be ace.  todd chavez was a really weird character for me to watch!  i was like way thrown off by how comfortable he was with talking about being asexual (even though it did take some time for him to accept it!  which is totally reasonable!).  but i think it was necessary because it weirdly went such a long way to normalizing it for me?  like i’m asexual!  i spent a large formative part of my late teens/early twenties interacting with almost all asexuals on the internet (aven).  if anyone is accustomed to asexuality it should be me, right??  but actually seeing a character be asexual and even discuss it proudly made me realize how much of a shameful secret i thought of my asexuality as.  i’ve definitely framed it as a forbidden or taboo topic and really separated my active, open asexual persona online from my irl persona.  anyway the fact that that one character had such an impact on me just goes to show how much we still need that kind of representation and not some bullshit rep.

okay onto fandom shit:

i just find there’s so much fan content (mostly fic!  because i don’t really engage in any other way and i don’t really have any desire to!  because it’s even worse for this than fic i have a sense!) that doesn’t want to think critically about what an asexual relationship means/looks like.  either they are not ace and have heard “oh okay aces ‘can’ have sex, well jon will just have sex!” or they are ace and idk have internalized that message as well?  either way i fucking hate people who don’t think about how that relationship might diverge from an allo one.  THEY ARE DIFFERENT.  ASEXUALITY IS ITS OWN THING.  IT IS NOT A THING WHERE YOU JUST DO WHAT YOUR PARTNER WANTS.  IT IS NOT A THING WHERE YOU SAY “OKAY SURE” AND NEVER DISCUSS BEYOND THAT OR BOTHER TO SET BOUNDARIES.  IT IS NOT JUST ONE CONVERSATION AND THEN DONE.  like an asexual relationship can be those things but i don’t think that’s an ideal relationship anyways?  (even for allos tbh..)  and idk why you’d want to idealize that in fandom anyways?  like you can make that relationship look like whatever you want!  why would you make it look like that?  (not to generalize or like invalidate anyone’s experience but i....feel like there is some internalized shit there.  especially when these things are presented without question?  like it’s one thing to present things one way and it’s another to do it without questioning.  one of my favorite ace fics (notably, not tma) is all about the ace character exploring his sexuality!  and having sex with his partner!  but it’s presented with such attention to all characters that i have no trouble at all.  having sex as an asexual is not inherently negative, but i cannot deal with media that doesn’t consider and address the implications of having sex as an asexual.

and honestly there’s so much discussion around the Issue (that i don’t even get involved in but it swirls around my peripheries of my fandom experience) that that aspect distresses me a lot!  because the people who disagree with me make me feel like shit.  i’m sure it is really confusing and difficult to be an asexual who is okay with sex, or interested in exploring sex, or whatever people would consider themselves.  it just feels antithetical to the asexual activism of ‘sex can be cool but it’s not necessarily for everyone.’  like, if you’re an ace who has sex or whatever, cool!  and i hope you can find your corner of the ace community that vibes with that.  i cannot, and like.  compulsory sexuality does not need propping up.  if sex is for you, then congrats!  you fit into the norm in that way!  you might not fit into the norm re: sexual attraction and i’m sure that’s not easy to reconcile.  however, i am not personally in a place where i can be the person who supports that uncritically when i’m still working within myself to understand where compulsory sexuality and amatonormativity have worked within me.  because i have been hurt by both of those things, MY primary goal is to work on dismantling those things (at least in myself, ideally in the world around me).  and people who do not have that as a goal and who instead want to mirror allo-ness in writing an ace character just don’t get the same consideration from me, unfortunately.  i guess this has helped me see that i should just fuck that noise.  if you want to make that the big thing you complain about on the internet i won’t stop you.  and...it occurs to me that’s what i’m doing!  so i’m going to refocus and stop just moping about my aro aceness and how i’m being ignored.  i’ve got better things to focus my time on than haters online.  i will not be dragged down to their mopey level!

also i feel weird and way too old for the fandom demographic (even though there are certainly fans waaaay older than me in the fandom!)  i think i’ve outgrown a lot of the fandom mentality.  wait is hockey fandom for old people?  (i’m fully not old but i’m probably old-ish for tumblr/fandom.  certainly old for tma fandom)  it occurs to me it’s sort of a graduation into a societally-acceptable form of fandom and it probably doesn’t appeal as much to younger audiences.  AND things can be as sexy/romantic or platonic as you like.

anyway all this is to say that i thought getting into media with aspec rep would be good for me but i think i must conclude that it has NOT.  it has actually just upset me way more than it has helped me feel good about being ace (which was the whole goal!).  i will be glad when it is over.  AND i’m glad i’ve really just been engaging with rqg fandom.  it is much more fun and a much better story! 

[kristenbeeapples]

Further questions anyway! Gorgug and Zelda = demi-pan with one or both possibly poly-fi? Yes or no.

Omg thank you both so much for asking about what was totally supposed to be a joke post! That being said you are going to regret it because I have a lot of feelings and this is going to be looooong.

Before I start I want to shout out @riz-gukgak for posting their aro Fantasy High headcanons for aro awareness week which are all great and introduced me to the hc that Gorgug’s parents are queerplatonic partners, and also the fic ‘just shut up and drive’ by meathermac on Ao3 which features ace Zelda! If anyone knows their tumblr let me know and I’ll tag them. (Also read it, it’s great!)

So to begin, I think there’s a lot of justification in canon for Zelda and Gorgug being ace or on the ace spectrum, and particularly Gorgug by virtue of him being a PC and us spending more time with him. The recurring gag of the binder/his parents explaining sex acts in a lot of detail to him are obviously very funny, but I’ve been doing a rewatch recently and it struck me that he never really seems into it? Like he always just seems confused or is like ‘huh, that’s interesting, I guess,’ but without any emotional attachment to it. It reminded me of how I reacted to the (limited, lol Catholic school) sex education I got - it was something that was interesting but I analysed it in an academic way rather than connecting it to myself, if you get what I mean. Probably it’s a comedic choice on Zac’s part but also in the context of the show I feel like him being ace makes sense.

As well, Zelda and Gorgug are such a contrast to the other teenage couples on Fantasy High. At first it was just Tracker and Kristen fucking all the time, which is fine and they’re a very different couple to Gorgug and Zelda, but this week we saw Ayda explicitly telling Fig she finds her erotic as well as them previously making out for a really long time (and of course the iconic Fig hot tub situation). We also have had Ragh hooking up with Fethethriel (? idk how to spell it) and other teen characters like Skrank canonically fucking a lot of people. As far as I remember the only thing we’ve seen Gorgug and Zelda do is kiss, and even that only a couple of times. They’ve been together for over a year and not done anything more - I get taking it slow or whatever, but that’s also a good justification for them to be ace!

As for specific headcanons, yes I think both of them are bi/pan-romantic. Zelda I feel like is demi-romantic also, and maybe thought she was aromantic for a while before having one of those really intense crushes on one of her friends in middle school and being like ‘oh no.’ I think when she and Gorgug were first hanging out she explained all this to him and when they officially Started Dating was like ‘we will have to take things really slowly before I’m comfortable.’ And Gorgug, being Gorgug, was like of course! And then as time goes on and on and they still haven’t done anything sexual, Gorgug realises he doesn’t really mind? If they never do anything at all? Gorgug mentions this to Adaine (who is for sure aroace) one day and she’s just like, ‘dude, you’re ace,’ and he’s like ‘oh, okay, makes sense!’ He and Zelda talk, and she realises she doesn’t mind either since she’s probably grey-ace/sex-neutral too so it works for them!

Also, I feel like Gorgug’s parents would feel absolutely terrible when he tells them - in my mind they’re like overcompensating for not being a “normal” couple by aggressively teaching Gorgug all about sex and relationships, but they just like. Forgot. That maybe he wouldn’t want a “normal” relationship either? They end up doing a bunch of research and make a new binder full of ace/aro terms to go through with Zelda and Gorgug and it’s just very sweet.

This has gotten ridiculously long but to finish, yes also to poly things (also in meathermac’s fic!) I feel like Gorgug and Ragh are queerplatonic partners/bros who make out sometimes, and Zelda has a similar relationship with someone from the seven maidens so it works out. However, they’re each other’s primary partners and their relationship is the only explicitly romantic one. 

TLDR; pan/demi-romantic/grey-ace Zelda and pan-romantic asexual Gorgug!

[silentvirgoj]

sexmania

I’m not sure what there is to fix, it’s simply just not the right parts. Nothing seems broken. If the groves from manufacture don’t match the add-ons, then what makes sense is that piece isn’t meant for the additions? It needs… something else? I suppose you can keep using energy and time to make something fit, make it work. But something tells me, it will always keep slipping and will continually need analyzing and further realizing the same revelation.

Sex, for me, is liberating. It’s something I am comfortable with, experienced with, and the act of cumming I am quite fond of. The thought of actual engagement of sex, does not necessarily always excite me. Sure, at times, but that need can be met so quickly and easily with a tool, and without emotional attachments if it were to be another person, the time and care those people do deserve. I could see myself, in the long run, being asexual. Sex is hot. I like getting dressed up. Even a little role-play and story-telling. I am attracted very much to any gender, I watch porn almost everyday and I cum almost every day. I don’t think that will change. However, needing to play a game every day with my partner of who we can get to fuck me, surprise me, get drilled by another dick, making websites and wearing outfits every day, and then to buying a phone to start making these fantasies a reality. I am starting to feel like a fraud. I am starting to feel overwhelmed. How much do you tell your partner that you’re into it, for their enjoyment, before everything is for their enjoyment and you have left yourself with no space? I want to make the people I love so happy, that I would do anything, even if it were a charade on how far I would go sexually for them. It’s not that I wouldn’t have sex with another man for him, or another women. It’s just the frequency that scares me. If the rate at which we talk about it became the rate that we actually participated in it.. I don’t think I’d ever let it get that far. 

I think about how I see other people procrastinate in things I could never, and yet, I am realizing, no matter how prompt I am, the one thing I will always put off is the most important, which is myself and how I feel. I will tolerate something in my life until the very last moment I can’t, and it blows up. I blow up. And I lose it and I run, because so much damage has been done.

I want to cry thinking about it. I thought my life changed a year ago when I met my partner. I started out being exactly who I was. But little by little, I caught myself doing what he wanted, because he likes control and I like to give it. 

If this relationship doesn’t work out, I feel like I can’t believe one will. I have lost a general hope for multiple connections with one person.

To note, my partner and I connect on… sex (but not necessarily our sex appetite), most values (like being a good person, having integrity in your work and relationship, being thoughtful in a relationship, doing whatever you need to for them, giving them what they want, and our creativity. I have to say that is the extent.. and they are all great things. 

I give Dan anything he wants. Anything. Even when I have sworn I never would, he somehow convinces me out of it, then I convince myself, too. God, I convince myself often. 

And we are back to what I had learned a long time ago, maybe dating back to high school. “Your self is always at fault”. Because you can blame the other person all day, but really any person, or I, am responsible for the things I say, how I behave, react, talk, what I do, how I do it. Every person has to take ownership for where they are in their lives.

I can’t begin to express what Dan has given to me, or what he has sacrificed so that I could be happy and taken care of. It is in his blood to care, just as much as it is to control. I am not speaking of “controlling” as a bad trait, because there are the positive ways he applies it, such as knowing that every persons in his personal life like kids, are accounted for, and all of his work people have clear expectations, and so do I.

I am privileged, I truly am. I am supported. I have freedoms that I always had dreamed of. I also realize the freedoms I have lost. This is a factual statement. I can now go to the store and buy whatever and however many groceries I want. When I want to try a recipe, I can. I can buy a coffee every day and not flinch. I can buy gifts for people or myself. There are no financial worries. I am financially pleasant. I am financially free. I am not, however, free to go climb a mountain whenever I want to. Or go hang out with a guy who yes I might find attractive and might have a small crush on but really hanging out with people in general is a way of discovering who you are in this life, by connection. I miss learning and randomly putting myself through school or different platforms of education. I use to put  myself through a lot, on a whim. And who I am today is so great because of it. I don’t know who I am now. It’s not that important to know anyway… 

I really love Dan because he pushes me to do things that I normally and lazily wouldn’t do. He talks me up, he tells me to “just do it” in a sense. He shows me how important it is to be kind to everyone, to not judge everything at first. Mostly business things. He judges a lot of things, like health, nutrition, fitness, disregards nature and planet Earth, he doesn’t like to think of himself as an artist… all things that make my heart soar, that make me who I am.

But I am getting side tracked. I am just feeling a huge disconnect because our relationship right now is super over sexualized and I don’t feel the same but I am saying I do and at first I thought it made sense to but now it’s showing how serious Dan is about all the things we talk about and I could be ostracizing it in my head because the rate at which we are doing things are high because he’s not here and he is very unhappy with where he currently is and this set up has him finding release but I wish we could find another kind of release because this isn’t natural to me and just feels like a giant distraction for him and sometimes people just need to “go through what the go through” and stop running and feel it and change what they feel like, instead of drowning it out with porn links and sexy outfits and my cumming. SIGH.

[rt8815]

Mamihlapinatapai

This follows my Untitled: “Last Gasp” Inspired piece from last year, so it’s set in mid March-ish 2018. It also fills the “Mutual Pining” square on my CM Bingo card.

WC: Almost 1,900

Notes: Taylor and Jaime are two of McKinley’s bandmates. They will appear in an earlier set fic that I haven’t finished yet 😏

Mamihlapinatapai is a Yagan (of the Nyungar people) word which means, “the wordless, yet meaningful look shared by two people who both desire to initiate something but are both reluctant to start.”

—–

“Congrats, guys!” McKinley exclaimed, raising her glass. “The Dream Team is back together and Barnes has retreated to her office to lick her wounds. All is as it should be.”

“Cheers!” everyone toasted, laughing against their professional judgement.

JJ slid into the seat next to McKinley.

“It feels great to come back home,” Emily sighed, soaking in the sunset view from Rossi’s back yard.

McKinley sipped her Scotch, tapping the table suddenly when something occurred to her.

“Spencer, how ever will you tell your students you’ll no longer be teaching full-time?” Her hand flew to her heart. “Your fan club will be absolutely devastated, poor things,” she smirked, sounding anything but sympathetic.

Spencer almost choked on his wine. “Oh God, no,” he started, but just then Garcia joined them at the table.

“What’s this about fan club stuff? Are you planning costumes for a convention?” she asked.

Spencer buried his face in his hands and grumbled something that sounded like ‘piece of meat.’

McKinley stole a bit of Penelope’s Mai-tai before continuing. “No cons, Penny, unless you think dozens of shrieking harpies only there to drool over the male lead qualifies as a ‘convention.’”

Emily leaned around JJ. “Well, that piqued my interest. Go on.”

Spencer moaned, his voice muffled behind his palms.

“Nearly one hundred people came to his lecture this week,” McKinley stated. “They’ve become very popular…with the ladies.”

“Wow! Spence, that’s great,” JJ congratulated him, though she had a mischievous gleam in her eye.

“Yeah, Boy Wonder,” Penelope chimed in. “Why the bashfulness?” She’d had a few drinks and was a bit slow on the uptake.

McKinley rolled her eyes. “Penny, bubeleh, most of them weren’t there to learn,” she emphasized, staring pointedly at Spencer.

Penelope started to cotton on. “Oh,” she grinned. “You’re saying that they-”

“Got it baaad, got it baaad, got it baaad. They’re hot for teacher. Ow!”

Emily wolf-whistled as JJ stretched over the table to ruffle Spencer’s hair.

He finally reemerged, his face beet-red, though he appeared annoyed rather than angry.

“Ley, tell us more about these fangirls,” Garcia demanded, bouncing in anticipation. “Give us the deets.”

McKinley glanced at Spencer, who shrugged, apparently resigned to the good-natured ribbing.

“Do y’all remember The Bimbettes from Beauty and the Beast?” she asked, “and the “I Love You Eyelid Girl” from Raiders of the Lost Ark?”

Penelope giggled into her drink. “That bad, huh?”

“Ugh, worse,” groaned McKinley, now buzzed and losing her filter. “Both of those things cranked up to eleven.”

She rested her elbows on the table, imitating everything the students had done. “They weren’ listenin’ to a thang he said. They twirled their hair, got all doe-eyed and constantly ‘Ooohed’ and ���Aaahed.’ Talk about flirtin’ up a storm. I swear a few of ‘em drooled.”

“You don’t say,” Emily snickered.

“It was disgusting. Those girls made such asses of themselves. I felt bad for ‘em really.”

“Uh-huh,” JJ chuckled, sounding unconvinced.

“No, honestly! They just would not back down. They stalked us through the hallway. I was worried they were gonna eat ‘im alive!” McKinley cried as she fluffed Spencer’s hair. “I had to keep Skindiana Jones here safe.”

“I uh, I don’t recall them stalking us,” Spencer interjected, “and I still don’t understand why women always-”

“Spence, read. the book. we gave you!”

“Seriously! This has happened on so. many. cases.”

“Yeah! Remember Lila Archer?”

McKinley whipped her head around. “Wait, what? Lila Archer the actress?”

“Yeah,” replied JJ. “Lila was a stalking victim 12 years ago. Spence stayed at her house. She pulled him into her pool and they made out.”

“Oh, she’s very pretty. I imagine that must’ve been quite something!”

“Don’t forget all the working ladies who hit on him,” Emily added.

“And the bartender who flirted with him,” slurred Penny.

Spencer shook his head. “Women go for guys like Morgan or Alvez, not me.”

McKinley frowned. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d assume that right there is false modesty. It’s not though, and that makes me sad.”

“I’m weird.”

“Weird should be a compliment,” McKinley countered.

“I ramble a lot-”

“Some find it endearing.”

“-about things nobody’s interested in.”

“I’m interested…”

But Spencer wasn’t paying attention.

“My hair’s too long…”

“It suits you, Spencer.”

“I dress like an eighty-year-old man.”

McKinley scrunched her face in amusement. “Yeah, like I said the other day, I’m fairly certain the whole tenured professor look is their kink. Face it, Pretty Boy: yer eye candy.”

Spencer grimaced and hoisted himself up from his chair.

“No, don’t go!” McKinley pleaded, loosely grabbing his forearms. “We’ll stop now, right guys?”

“Of course.”

“Sure.”

“Fine, I’ll zip my perfect, rosy lips.”

Spencer eyed them warily before lowering himself back down. As he drained his glass, McKinley resumed her elbows-on-table pose, feigning innocence.

“I do have one question for you though, Doctor.”

He arched an eyebrow. “What might that be?”

McKinley fiddled with his tie, unknotting it. “I’m worried about my grade in your class. T-t-t-teacher, can you see me after school?”

Spencer sputtered, blushing furiously, then jerked his tie out of her hand and stormed off as dignified as possible.

“I think of all the education that I missed,” she called after him, gesturing for the others to join her. They chorused, “But then my homework was never quite like this!”

They all dissolved into fits of laughter, although McKinley’s quickly dissipated.

“Shit, he’s my ride home. That’s gonna be awkward.”

Emily cleared her throat. “So, how long have you been in love with Reid?”

“I – what?” McKinley squeaked. “I’m not in love with Spencer! What gave you that idea?”

“That show you put on just now. Plus, I saw you two on my porch the other day. I have security cameras…with audio,” Emily admitted.

“Anyway, you’ve looked at each other differently for a while now. You act differently towards each other too. Maybe bringing up the lecture is your subconscious telling you that you two have evolved beyond friendship.”

McKinley shook her head. “Emily, we haven’t known each other long enough for that.”

“Granted, five months is fast,” said Tara, who’d slid into the table unnoticed, “but you’ve spent a lot of his sabbatical and regular time outside work together. Simply put? The quality of your and his friendship could well outweigh the length.”

“And the way you talked about those students?” JJ added. “You called them shrieking harpies and you sounded ready to rip them apart. I mean, I believe that they drooled over Spence, but you laid it on kind of thick. Was it all about keeping him safe, or was it also you telling them to back off?”

That had McKinley stumped. She remembered silently mocking the girls’ behavior, and how she smugly whispered, “It’s never gonna happen,” effectively saying Spencer was out of their league. What stood out the most was how she stared them down as she linked arms with him, deriving satisfaction from their…jealousy?

“Did I deliberately taunt them?” McKinley wondered to herself.

She recalled a sensation of hackles raising. There was no polite way to word it.

“I was marking my territory.”

McKinley had a sudden desire to take a shower.

Her feelings had undoubtedly shifted, but she had no frame of reference for them. And that frightened her.

She switched tactics. “Don’t forget that I’m aroace, guys. I don’t experience romantic or sexual attraction.”

Garcia popped up from her phone, where she’d been hunting down the ‘perfect first date venue.’ “You talk a lot about how sexy and pretty guys are, though. I’ve caught you staring at many a tuchus. What’s that about?” she winked.

McKinley cut eyes at her. “I’m asexual, Penny, not blind. I admired the Venus de Milo too, but I didn’t wanna hump it either.”

“Y’know, I used to identify as bi,” Penelope replied. “I was in my late twenties before I knew that I’m pan. It’s only for you to say but, it might be worth considering demi identities.”

That struck a chord with McKinley. It would require a lot of unpacking her emotions, but it was definitely worth considering.

…

Spencer stole glimpses at McKinley as he drove her home. She was drumming a beat on the armrest. He chuckled; she always did that while deep in thought.

Stopping at a light pulled her from her reverie. “Thank you for driving me home,” she said rather meekly.

“You’re welcome. Never take Uber or Lyft.” He coughed nervously. “You know, because it’s not the safest mode of transportation. Half of our cases start that way,” he joked.

McKinley grinned. “You’re an absolute prince for doing this, especially since I’m a rotten friend.”

Spencer’s jaw dropped. “No, you’re not! Is this about the lecture? Because it’s nothing the team hasn’t teased me about before.”

“Yeah, but I shoulda known they’d take the piss,” she whined, kicking her legs grumpily, “and I went too far with the song. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay, I forgive you,” he assured her as he stepped on the gas. “Although, I’d like to point out that I’ve never once brought up the men who hit on you at bars.”

“True,” McKinley breathed, playing with a loose thread on her blouse. “But that seems to have died down at O’Keeffe’s recently.”

Spencer pressed his lips together, eyes fixed on the road. She eyed him suspiciously.

“You wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?” she prodded him.

“Think fast.”

“It’s probably the team’s presence. Most of the regulars know who we are.”

Fortunately, she accepted his suggestion. “Yeah, that’s feasible.”

“Truth is I shoved my credentials in their faces once or twice,”he confessed silently.

“When that doesn’t work, I step between you and them while flashing my revolver, but I’m not owning up to any of that.”

Spencer parked in Taylor and Jaime’s driveway and walked McKinley to her tiny house in the backyard. Boogie bolted out to greet them, tail wagging vigorously.

At her door, she twisted around for a final goodnight, surprised to find Spencer standing so near. He raised his hand and combed his fingers through her hair.

“Cherry blossom,” he explained, showing the pale pink flower in his hand. Spencer reached up again, brushing hair out of her eyes, lingering this time.

McKinley found herself tilting her head into his hand.

“Please don’t stop playing with my hair. Is this what he feels when I play with his? Am I blushing? Is he blushing? What’s that look he’s giving me? Affection? Is that how I look at him? I wish he’d say something. I should say something, but I can’t speak. My heart’s pounding. What’s wrong with me? I never have trouble talking to Spencer. How can someone make me flustered and relaxed at the same time?”

Spencer moved even closer. “Ley, I was wondering -”

“Bork!”

They sprang apart, the spell broken, to see Boogie dancing impatiently. He jumped, placing his paws on Spencer’s thighs.

“Hey buddy, I’m not ignoring you,” he promised as he scratched the dog’s ears.

Satisfied, Boogie pushed open the door and stared expectantly at McKinley.

Spencer retreated down the stairs. “I should be going. Good night, Ley,” he said, the slightest note of disappointment in his voice.

“Night, Spencer. Text me when you get home?”

“Always,” he smiled up at her, stepping backwards towards the fence and through the gate.

—–

@illegalcerebral @dreatine @cynbx @cmbingo

Everyone else let me know if you’d like to be tagged in the future!