#anyhow i'll be around
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PW:AA Spoilers (1-4)!
one of my favorite things about miles edgeworth is how profoundly human he is. we're led to believe he's abandoned all morals leading up to 1-3. then, his interference gets your client a not guilty verdict and you start thinking there's some good left in him. come 1-4, his facade slips and you glimpse upon how caring he truly is, what with him trying to keep phoenix out of dl-6 (and, as a consequence, away from defending him) + paying maya's bail after she's held in contempt of court.
he subverts every expectation you have about someone who falls under his character archetype. i was especially moved by his dialogue in the detention center.
exhibit A:
Phoenix: Can I ask you about the murder? Edgeworth: Wright. I'll ask you again, just leave me alone. Phoenix: ... Edgeworth: Please try to understand. I'm not doing this to prove I'm tough, or because I look down on you. I just don't want you anywhere near this case. Understand?
exhibit B:
Phoenix: Edgeworth? Edgeworth: It's only been a matter of hours since you last visited. Yet you've made incredible progress in your investigation. I'll admit it, I'm impressed, Wright. You were always single-minded in your work, though. Once you start on something, you always see it through, don't you? Phoenix: About the "DL-6 Incident"... Edgeworth: Right... DL-6. I didn't want you to find out about it. That is why I refused your offer to defend me. I'm sorry if it sounded like I thought you weren't up to the job. I just wanted to keep you away from DL-6.
he's quick to reassure phoenix that this isn't about pride or faith in phoenix's capabilities, though he'd used petty insults to ward phoenix off earlier.
i'm of the (unpopular?) opinion that of phoenix and edgeworth, edgeworth is a far warmer person. it's why i can't quite buy yamazaki's edgeworth in most cases, but that's a topic for a different post i already have drafted.
this also isn't meant to undermine the gravity of edgeworth's mistakes as the "demon prosecutor". it's very likely he put away innocents while burying his past. i do strongly believe the first game (and every game in the first trilogy, really) rounds the characters in a way the second trilogy often couldn't, though, and it's that charm that makes the first trilogy feel timeless.
#`ace attorney#miles edgeworth#phoenix wright#vel talks ace attorney#pumped this out bc of my reply on a random tweet lmao the brainworms are worming#when i say 'warmer' i don't necessarily mean 'warmest' or 'kindest' or 'always a pleasant person to be around' bc he's still very mean!#anyhow the reason you'll rarely see me analyzing edgeworth in isolation is bc his character story genuinely makes me breathless with grief#i'll have more to say abt this on replay but i'm excited to replay aa1-aa3 retrospectively#ace attorney spoilers#aa1 spoilers
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I’m turning you all into marketable plushies, you watch (Patreon)
Bonus eyes because embroidery brain:
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#ZEX#Original#Cure#Bar#Caleb Stern#Brain has turned to plush mush lol#Tsumtsums really feel like the correct outcome here for those two hehe ♪#I actually went about looking over my like - one and a half Tsumtsums to get a grasp on their construction#Y'know for funsies just to see just to be curious#I think they wouldn't be all that hard to make - something to consider anyhow#I was also thinking about the Tsumtsum sneezing thing lol - many Max all flopping around a Dex! Or many Dex overwhelming a Max haha#Still on the ZEX plush brainrot of course of course he's just so cute ;;#Thinking a lot about construction of his eye :0 I see the appeal of printed fabric so you don't have to contend with large embroidery#Or seams - especially on circles hgwegh not my favourite#Just want it to be flush and flat! Eye-shaped rather than any bulges hmmm how to how to#I'll figure it out - there's ways to make recessed edges in plushies too! Just a matter of how#Few originals to throw into the mix ♪ Cure's already a plush bear! Specifically with the plush pattern I have on hand#I personally don't care much for the pinch style of sewing on features but I feel like at least for her ear inlays that'd probably work best#For the ''meaty'' part of her ears maybe that could be full and proper lol#Barrr <3 Just now realizing how off-model I drew him lol but either way! Huggable! ♥ I've looked- ball-jointed plushies are Kind of a thing?#Even if it was just by shape tho it'd be awfully cute :) And to dress him up in a tiny jacket hehe#More of the Helix lads! Bit cleaner now that I know a bit closer what I'm aiming for hwah they're so cute ;;#I do think it'd be really fun for them to have different eye shines based on their personalities :D#It wouldn't be all that much more work - maybe a lack of practice on specific shapes but apart from that#And rounding out with a short joke lol Caleb's the shortest! It's only right that he'd be a smaller plush! Obviously! Lol
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Happy Vargasversary! Only one meme this year, but I do have a few Vargas-themed online dolls and Picrews for your viewing pleasure lol
I’m so sad about Flash!! It’s just not the same with Ruffle, at least there’s Flashpoint. Anyway, pretty sure I made this Scriabin before the shutdown haha
I can’t find this one, which is such a shame! I think it’s a total classic :0 Something something computer Scriabin haha, there’s no long hair option! Wires are a good enough stand-in
Had to do it the other way around too of course. Don’t tease him! (Do tease him)
Kitty!Edgar! Being able to add things like his glasses, goatee, striped “shirt”, even his bangs! So many lovely options 💕
Feeling normal, covered in blood. I always love when Makers include the Red String, it is Excellent ✨
Rinamaru‘s Anime Avatar Creator, THE maker GOAT to me ♥ Got a sequence of Edgar newly face-cut-up, with the bandaid on his nose, and then “fully” healed hehe
Ladyverse!Jake and Edgar! ♥ I think I was going to make Scriabin as well but there weren’t enough features that’d suit him so these two got the feature instead ♪ I can’t find this one either, I think it’s a Picrew though...? Update: Smol found it!! Thank you!!
Smol also made the boys with one of her fave Picrews! For only really knowing Vargas from my incessant talk (lol), I think she captured them quite lovely :D
I also had to give them a go of course haha, I’m very happy for the option to remove eyes lol
#💟#Shitpost#You think that just because I only have one meme I'm going to miss a national holiday???#Lol#21 years........ Vargas can now drink in the US lol#I know I had another meme edit in mind like a week ago and it's been eluding me ever since >:0#Well if it comes back to me I'll have one ready for next time haha#I've been on the fence about sharing these sillies because well - they're silly! But they're also cute and I like them :)#Shame about the ones I can't find now I even scoured Flashpoint for the one I know was around before Flash shut down :(#I really can't remember what the girls sitting next to each other one is tho >m< If anyone recognizes them I'd love a link!#Very much want to give credit to these lovely artists <3#Scriabin is shockingly difficult to make in dollmakers lol - he's just too beautiful to be correctly perceived smh#Edgar on the other hand is quite easy so he gets a lot of the spotlight haha#I rarely stray outside of those two but hmm maybe going forward seeing if I can make a complete set ♪#Anyhow lol
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Because I am lazy with reinventing stuff I have been looking at some fallen angels (mostly Watchers because there is a list) and it's so funny to me that there is/was an angel around to "Cure the stupidity of men" Like thanks I need no more
also there was one guy which bascially was a constellation myth for Orion and he and Azazel(/Lucifer/Satan/whoever pointed Eve to the apple) were punished by hanging out between Heaven and Earth...forever or a long time but that got me to think...this would mean that (insert name of whoever tempted Eve in YOUR specific texts) is also a constellation, and if it's Lucifer it'd be the Morning Star which from what I remember either refers to Venus OR the brightest Star in the Sky aka Sirius aka part of Canis Major aka the constellation right next to Orion Fallen Angel shenanigans in the Sky? it's more likely than you think
also smth smth them being turned into Constellations and humanity using Fallen Angels, aka the givers of forbidden knowledge (you know..like reading and stuff) to navigate smth smth
#txts#look i know this is an overall...mix of many canons#not all bible#but i always associate that stuff with the bible bc thats my first introduction i got to this kinda God and his cohort#its still part of christianity and judaism afaik#but i think it was part of different books#.....i think even B.C but i also think some stuff referred to Jesus#but that might have just been Abaddon whose canon goes beyond a name and title#good for them#or them as a place#or them as dirt digger#or them as witness of jesus rebirth#i'll stop there#i enjoyed digging through greek myths as a kid#this tbh brings the same stuff out again#bc you can just see the connections people have made#and how they explained the world and happenings around them#by making up a lot of funky little guys#and telling stories to teach societal conventions#or sometimes just to make smth cool up (also good)(maybe not for historians but hey)#so anyhow i am absolutely imaging Samyaza(insert 20different ways to spell his name here) getting plopped up there#and Az/luci/satan/whomever at this point just going 'First Time?'#as they both just have to hang out around there#does it make sense? not rly#but neither does texts describing Azazel as someone distinct from Lucifer#or him as both a place AND a fallen angel#and sometimes the same one as Samael#bc these texts are fucking old and from various places and cultures and ever shifting depending on what was needed#so in this one canon(my headcanon)...this exists now
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1/ this bout of comms almost done and 2. spawndate in 3 days so I have! been fixin up some stuff for the itch store. that'll go live on the 29th! right now there Is a pack of the lineart stuff I did last year for folks who found that agreeable, still free to grab! for practicing coloring, or if you wanna mess around with colors when ur not feelin like doing lineart, or if you wanna try to figure out colors in a drastically different style than what you usually go for. or if u just wanna look at it that's cool too. small announcement that is all see u in a few
#bakuspeech#update on the situation: is mostly contained. it'll take a fair bit to make up for how much it's kicked us in the nuts#but it's doable. just Very annoying and tedious and sudden and overall it just sucks#esp. like right up close to my birthday lmao. like if it happened earlier this year I'd be like alright. sucks shit but par for the course#this year has already been so fucked up. this might as well happen#but since it's happened in december it really brings on the feeling of like. fr bitch?#right in front of my cake? me the birthday boy? the specialest fucking boy?#but well. theres a Thing around here that's ur birthday usually being the unluckiest day#but also we're the kind of folks who track death dates rather than birthdays. like up until very recently#all four of my grandparents have unspecified birthdays. their birth years aren't even correct. on paper they're like#a few years older than they actually are#and my granddad on my dads side was even from a family of some means so it wasnt even a class thing#man. last year Something was happening around this time too. idr what but it also sucked#mmm. well. what is really just is. and I've already taken a hammer to it anyhows#I'll do the same for the birthday thing. it Will be fucking good. I take a hammer to it#I'm very glad I still get some commissions even tho it was practically right up to noel#you guys are very generous. I don't say it as often as I should I think but I'm very very thankful for the support#glad to hang out around here still. glad to have the folks I have here. thank u for chillin with me#please look forward to the itch store update. got a new thing along with the old things ported over. stay tuned
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imagine how drastically different spending a day with barton could be as his friend though... like, it's literally a coin flip between him doing something illegal but perhaps objectively kind of funny in a 'wtf is happening?' way, to him doing just completely morally bankrupt. and for the first thing, i'm talking about barton stealing all of the candles of a certain scent from a store because he liked it and because 'they're already making enough money.' or, for the latter, barton not telling your muse anything about how everything they're doing that day is to prepare for him to MURDER someone. which then all of a sudden comes to a climax when he kills them like that is a totally okay to do (and this is sarcasm, OFC jsjsj) while he genuinely thinks he looks like this to your muse afterward when he just committed a damn atrocity:
#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#ooc post.#yeah i... idk what this is y'all but i swear to god he either has the most gremlin-like energy or decides to go postal around the right-#people if that makes any sense. like obviously stealing candles from a multi-million corporation is minor in comparison to literally-#murdering someone BUT it still isn't good JSJSJ and by the 'right people' i mean those who already know who he is / are aware-#of his 'dollmaker' persona because at the end of the day he isn't trying to get arrested despite how contrary to the fact this all-#may seem AHHH. also i'm sorry for using that picture y'all but i just... i still find it kind of funny in a bad way NGL BAHAHAH#and of course i'm not trying to make light out of him being a bad person. he is just SO ridiculous that he would think he looks like-#that little guy looking up innocently at your muse ☠️ anyhow though are you all tired of me making these crack-y posts yet / j#NAH i kiddd but yeah. i promise i'll post some more serious stuff on here soon but this just popped up in my head and i had to-#get it out of my system mostly due to the image of him just stuffing a bunch of candles in a backpack is hilarious to me
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you know what, I've never actually heard legit elevator music in my life, time to rectify this
#I've heard the term tossed around so much that I forgot it probably originally referred to an actual thing and not just like a metaphor#anyhow so I went and found myself 49 song playlist of alleged elevator music#until I actually end up in an elevator with said music I will never experience it in it's true environment#but at least I'll finally have a frame of reference#oracle of lore
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wow. two universes interacting with me at the same time...is kind of...uh... a lot. anyways, in less important news, today is the last day of school before winter break. the kindygarteners get to have pajama day and we don't, and george and harold are obviously quite grumbly about it. this happens every year, they haven't had pajama day since kindygarten, and once the day comes, they get all down in the dumps. not like it involves me. i personally don't care for pajama day. they never gave them anything they considered good, like sweets and stuff like that. i don't quite get why they miss it if they didn't get to do anything 'fun'.
#sk logs#i'm allergic to sweets anyhow#not like i'll be able to have any of that stuff#no point in missing something like that if i'm not gonna be able to do anything my peers consider 'fun'#there's nothing special about pajama day anyways since jerome horwitz does the bare minimum for it#at least theres nothing special about it that i've heard about from other schools#just sitting around and talking and playing videogames and eating sweets#quite a waste of valuable time i could be using for more important things
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going feral over elliott smith (again)
#i'm never gonna know you now // but i'm gonna love you anyhow#drink up baby // look at the stars // i'll kiss you again // between the bars#i'm in love with the world // through the eyes of a girl // who's still around the morning after#<- my favourite lyrics from each song respectively#this man is a genius#elliott smith#music stuff
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Maybe something with Mousey being jealous of Hunter and Smoker for one reason or another? hehe
Day 7 - There might be a reason for that
Bonus:
#My art#Requestober#RespectAWoman#Hunter#Smoker#Mousey#Always love when my bonuses are just as if not more technically complex than the main lol#I mean I say that but it was more just tedious to move things between EPSAI2 and GIMP lol#Chibi heads bopping around and a bust-up are not as intensive! My poor hand haha ♪#So this is my first time drawing the ladies digitally huh?? Or at least this trio anyhow haha I'll draw the other two someday#Considering Mousey is my favourite of all of them and her dynamic with Charger was one of my driving loves <3#I also realized while drawing this that she (as a survivor) and Max have the same outfit so that's ♥#White button down and khakis are fairly standard I know let me live XO I love them!!!#Went with pre-infected here tho ♪ When Mousey's still focused on Smoker! Hehe yaay#She's so cute <3 Love that wonderful disaster <3 <3 And also the mains as well!!! Lol#They were actually a lot of fun to draw digitally haha ♪ Hair touching - kind of all over touching lol Hunter's just Like That#I did kinda forget about Hunter's camo pants so I leaned on my SAI textures - but I did the shines on her duct tape myself! Pleased :)#I was thinking at first of Hunter offering Smoker a soda but she pushes for Smoker to be healthy huh!#So I was thinking maybe a weird-flavoured sports drink or sugar-free lemonade or something lol#And the usual ribbing lol Mousey do you know what you're wishing for ♫#I had a moment while drafting where I was like ''Where was the one of Smoker playing Tetris?? :0''#I 100% completely totally remembered it in full colour - but no that was just my brain filling in the details lol it was a sketched comic!#Whenever I think of RespectAWoman that's just the style I see in my head so my mind's eye took it from there pft#I found it in the end ♥ Had to make reference to it! As it's one of my favourites :D
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its not even 9pm why am i having the 9pm thoughts :(
#vent in tags#delete later#for sure. rule number one. never show weakness.#oooh nobody likes you and everyone is just keeping you around out of convenience#well no fucking shit. thanks for the news. got anything else brain?#i can't even keep irl friends what makes me think i can keep online ones too?#i'm unimportant in the grand scheme of things and always have been. i can provide a temporary joy but one day i'll fade away#because that's just what i do. i provide a temporary service in exchange for a little company and then i let people move on with their#lives. i'm unimportant and always will be.#i always feel alienated and alone. the world literally is not meant for me. i should be dead or something probably#even surrounded by people i so desperately want to call my friends i feel like i'm entirely alone... even the people i /do/ call friends...#well... they'll leave too someday. won't they? i don't deserve people around me after all.#i'm doomed to die alone anyhow... maybe one day i'll breed just for the sake of carrying on my name and then i'll fuck off and die#i doubt it though. i don't have a desire to have children... i'll just die alone and my branch of the family tree will end with me#i wanna get married but what're the chances of that? zero probably. who'd marry /me/?#even if all i want is someone to wake up next to... who'd ever give me that? i don't deserve it.#i'll stick to my fantasies. thanks. at least i have that.#some people yumeship for fun. i yumeship because i know nobody will ever want me.
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through all the practice sawashiro fights ive done this morning ive decided he has a really weird grudge against eri for whatever reason
#snap chats#IM CRYING#THE PAST LIKE FIVE RUNS HE'S TARGETED HER THE MOST#there was a run where joon-gi got the shit of it but for the most part it's just been eri#and she'll be on the cusp of health and ill be like 'well i can just heal next turn' and then Next Turn happens and he beelines for her#LIKE LEAVE HER ALONE SHE JUST SELLS CRACKERS WHAT IS YOUR DAMAGE. feminist king he's prioritizing the woman#bro found out her company's called 'ichiban confections' and saw red. literally Lol Hi Ichi#anyway. ive figured a new strat to get out of his second phase faster since that's The Problematic Phase#in my notes it says to buy two (2) rocket launchers before leaving sotenbori but i cant ?? find out where the second one's meant to go#one of them's meant for kiryu but after the kiryu fight i have in my notes to buy two more so. and you can only hold two launchers#this aint RE4 shit where you can just rocket launcher your way through the game LMAO#but yeah BEGRUDGINGLY listening to yokoyama's speedrun advice for once#ive routed in a rocket launcher as soon as the second phase starts#with any luck At Most i'll only have to deal with one or two cane strikes#so if i can just buff out the timing then this fight shouldn't be all that scary anymore#im slightly skeptical on my numbers since in this file i have adachi was one level short of getting the essence of shield rupture#so i had to do a little extra grinding but i dont think it'll be that different from a live run. i just want to perfect the guarding anyhow#y7's stats arent really revolved around your party member's levels its more around their equipment. level's important sure but not overly s#i thiiiink im getting better at it: ive figured that when he uses vile mutilation during the first phase it's a quicker guard vs vile enmit#just gotta get the feel of it down..#after my class i think im gonna have a Boss Fight Practice stream#im p sure i have a speedrun save right before the millenium tower and i think im gonna quickly make kiryu and ishioda ones#since im right here anyway#ok by i have twenty minutes Until that class lmao
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going to events is dangerous
not me coming home from a medieval market with another old time'y compass and a little handheld telescope
#noopa rambles#did I absolutely blow my budged? yes. yes I did.#do they bring me a ridiculous amount of joy? yes. yes they do.#I have no regrets#I now have three old time'y compasses#but hey at least I didn't buy another littel sword this time around#I didn't even buy any rocks or crystals!!!#I almost did but the only stall that had them didn't really have anything I fancied#there's gonna be other crystal and rock shops with more stuff#I did almost buy a little replica of legolas' knife from the films#but the color of the handle didn't really look good in my opinion so I decided against buying it#anyhow the market had a shitton of cool stuff#one day I'll have enough money to buy like a little forged letter opener#I mean it won't happen if I keep spending money on compasses but a gal can dream#not me spotting the compass and globe shop across the walking path and going#'I have found my people' and beelining to see the littel things
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the tiny fox is caused by the fact that she does not have issues with them directly ( she is too much of a cryptid to care about them ) but since she normally has issues with anyone, i think it was fitting to put at least a itty bitty fox on there 🦊 everything else ? she is proudly fluttering her lashes right now !!
barton audibly let out a loud ' huh? ' in shock whenever he saw that all of the boxes he put on the bingo card were, once again, checked off by another person. but this time it was by none other than ahri; the nine-tailed fox who he never would've thought he matched with, but then again, surprises were kind of bound to happen whenever it came to a thing like this. barton honestly fumbled for what to say for a moment before he pursed his lips in an attempt to hold back a smile and let his eyes dart from side to side, as if he was trying to make sure no one else was present in the room. and this was seemingly because he wanted to... run to close the door to his room? okay, well, that was a bit weird. but i suppose that is to be expected from him by now. as long as he didn't do anything else weird —
oh, wait, i spoke too soon. barton was now punching the air out of a sense of victory and started to laugh, ❝ yes! oh my god, fuck you, doctor orion. damn douchebag who said i'd never be able to find one person who would like me for me because i'm 'unlovable.' well, i actually found two, you dunce! ❞ barton was practically vibrating with happiness as he purposely flopped down on his bed and sighed dreamily. he took a moment to just bask in his self-satisfaction, with his eyes closing, before he realized: 'oh, yeah. i should probably say something to ahri.' barton honestly did fumble with figuring out what to say for a bit considering the fact that he got two bingos so close together was a bit flustering to him.
but hey, he could manage. barton sat up then before placing both of his hands below his chin. ( BYEEE ☠️ THIS PICTURE )
❝ so, uh, how do you feel about garlic breadsticks? and just italian food in general, actually? because if you wanted to, ❞ barton paused as he attempted to push down the flusteredness he was (still) feeling. ❝ i know this really good italian restaurant in town, so maybe we could go on a date there? it'll be my treat... i promise! it's just that i noticed you put a big marker over the 'love as consumption' thing, so i think we may just get along splendidly. ❞
#vulpesse#type bingo!#JSJSJ i'm sorry but i saw that image in my meme stockpile and just HAD to use it LOL so i hope that's alright with you#buttt just the fact that one of his doctors from arkham told him that he was ' unlovable ' is honestly really messed up whenever you think-#about it. like aren't you supposed to be helping people not tormenting them? AHHH but then again that doctor is just nottt good in general#so it unfortunately isn't all that surprising that he'd say that BUT barton punching the air is now an image that i'll never get out of my-#head and i hope it was able to make you laugh as much as it made ME laugh writing it LMAOOO#now when are they going to carrabas HMM? JSJSJ nahhh obviously there's no pressure for them to go on a date i'm just joking around-#but... barton would really like that 👀 if she wanted to that is!!#rp memes.#and also ahri not having problems with cops is so valid actually BUT we love the fact that you still put a little fox there anyhow 🥰
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I'd like to say I was drawing more this month, but tbh, with work on Outbreak and one of my coworkers getting sick (on top of going from good mental health at the beginning of the month to baaaad mental health towards the end) I really don't have much to show for it.
So here's my Shapeshifting Horny Fey Artist who's in an artistic slump going on adventures in the material plane and having existential crises... Or more likely, my man is memeing on himself.
#the disappointment speaks#drawings by me#ocs#sort of life woes given I've been kinda drained lately but hey that's just how it be on this bitch of an earth#I mean my goal for the year is to reorganize downsize and reset my main space to work better for me#so maybe then I'll have more want to draw or do stuff. idk. maybe#but hey if theres anything I've realized now more than ever#fuckin furnature is expensive as hell#my bed was bought like. its one of those ikea box with drawers in it style beds yeah? its great! love the storage#it was bought I wanna say around 2003 ish. it's an old and sturdy bitch that is kinda small for me now but uh#to put it simply I gotta move it around a bit before I could consider a larger bed. anyhow.#I looked into one dresser that's perfect. 5 drawers. reasonably sized. ikea. its like 400$. my bed was bought for 200$#this is all in CAD so maybe its like that because of CAD but STILL. fucking shit's fucking expensive.#I'm already gonna drop minimum 600$ for bonus extra stuff I'll be getting myself when I finally can reorganize#and when I get rid of deadass 6 pieces of furniture that barely function that'll be dope as fuck#but like come on. my furniture I need to get costs 3x my monthly paycheck. it's too expensive. thank god I only have to buy them once tho#hopefully. Unless wario's massive fat dumper lands on my dresser or some shit and breaks it completely within three years or w/e
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ladies and gentleman we back to "crying at 5am on a worknight-when will it ever stop?!" and i am sure my period being like a week away is not helping, even tho this feels more like general dread and helplessness and frustration and general mid 20s angst and not more usual pre-period drama it's not making this any better and i am mostly annoyed and angry between sobs....which is an interesting mix of emotions but not unusual
#txts#how did my mother get me checked for like depression way late in but not just...moodswings#bc boy are they still around as expected#not like anything came out the depression checkup#bc i was a....well depressed teen who didnt wanna do shit but be left alone to rot#so i didnt even go to therapy#i am not mad at myself for that but i feel like it' might have opened some options#eh well#rant#venting#anyhow i DO have a normal 9hour shift today so we are fucking freeballing it no sleep except the extra 2hours i allowed myself from yesterd#i have given up on rest#i am therapising myself and then just hanging out#researching jobs and Ausbildung and Umschulung#and either getting more intrigued bc that would work#or more anxious bc expecations#'oh no they want me to be good at math' literally had to do 90% math at last jobs training in school#give me the formula book thingie and i'll be fine#ask me out of the blue and i'll freeze and cry and just go blank for like an hour or so#not sure if thats a me-brain thing or that happened bc of school but hey#it sure is a wall#i'll continue hugging myself angrily and looking into jobs or whatever#stressful.......why is this all so stressful#and why do i feel like i am betraying my current workplace? stop overusing empathy this wasnt the goal x-x
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