#another person said abt autism

[silly-himbim]

YouTube commentors try not to be the most rudest people challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

[c0rpsedemon]

.

[queridaz]

welp. they made a mistake and instead of booking me an autism screening they booked me a therapy session.

[natalie-goodmn]

Next to Normal round 3 thoughts:

there’s a lot of things I noticed this time that I didn’t before but that’s just bc as a Natalie stan I must be looking at her the whole time

- I never noticed Gabe throwing Dan’s keys in Just Another Day before that’s SO funny

- I also finally saw Diana kiss Henry, she really WENT FOR IT

- is it just me or does the Wyndhams need to turn up their mics?? Maybe it’s just that I need it In My Ear Canal but I’ve noticed the singing is a bit quiet (I also didn’t notice this in Oklahoma)

- I love Gabe holding the microphones to Natalie and Dan during their I’m Alive dialogue. He might be a demon with the spirit of a dead two year old but he’s sooo silly :D

(this is getting long so more under the cut)

- something something Natalie playing her fake keyboard with the band’s piano behind her, something acting and pretending like she’s a normal person with a normal family

- I just realised that Gabe AND Natalie licks up Diana’s leg. Diversity win

- the parallels of Gabe and Diana reaching out to each other in Im Alive vs Natalie reaching down to her in Wish I Were Here (and maybe Catch Me I’m Falling) i feel sick,,,

- Gabe holding Diana in I Am the One like Henry’s holding Natalie, welcome back Freudian Gabe

- also the head kiss parallel with Gabe in Just Another Day and before he’s about to leave in I Dreamed a Dance

- the blood is so visceral but a part of me misses the bway staging too where they just walk off slowly and as dr madden talks abt Diana’s attempt. It’s basically the same thing but the reveal felt slower idk

- also man every time I miss the donmar staging of the one tiny bit where Dan’s going “Is this helping or? Di?” as Diana just walks off and back to the therapy chair. Idk it just felt like dissociation better to me, but I do like Ominous Circle Of Thinking

- I also love love love how they play the “I love you as much as I can” in this. They play it like a failed charm roll, and you really get everyone’s frustration and that she’s trying hard

- and then in Maybe when you see that Diana actually knows Natalie deeply bc she’s like her,,, hold on. Similarly, I love how the first person Natalie hugs in act two (I think?) is Diana instead of Henry. Me when the real story is between a mother and daughter (mamma Mia who)

- Diana rolling her eyes and mouthing ‘oh my fucking-‘ to Dan going “can you tell me what it is you’re afraid of” is maybe the best representation of anxiety and I’m not even kidding, MOOD Diana

- god I know it’s been in all the productions but I love how much agency Diana has, you rarely see it with mentally ill characters but she’s so funny and knows what she wants and I love her

- everyone’s said it, everyone knows it but JACK WOLFE god he’s amazing every time

- I’ve thought this both times, is it just me or when Gabe is silhouetted (I think with the music box) is his neck like inhumanly thin??? Like genuinely asking, I don’t think that’s Jack’s neck?? Is it?? Am I just misunderstanding human anatomy when someone wears a hoodie

- I’ve said it before but I Am the One reprise is one of the best scenes in musical theatre and it should end there. I’m a Light hater SORRY, I like the message a lot but it’s always felt like a studio note or something where they’ve been told that it has to be uplifting at the end or it’ll do badly and make everyone sad

- natalie,,, covering her ears and her big headphones. Autism. Also really love Eleanor’s portrayal of her anxiety. Instead of Jen’s anger, she has a hamster like anxiety quality to her (complimentary)

- also I swear I see no one talk about it WHEN GABE TOUCHED NATALIE’S HAND??? AND SHE NOTICES SOMETHING??? That’s new for this production right?? Theories???

- Natalie starting to tidy up Gabe’s toys,,, she’s breaking the cycle,, she’s the hope. And playing with them with Henry and showing him the bunny toy 😭

- I’ll say it. The “you’re like number one on my list of problems” doesn’t work that well if you don’t have Jen and Adam’s sarcasm. Too earnest. Banned.

- I’ve said a lot abt this Henry but I actually like this act 2! He plays him v desperate and anxious which I don’t think Adam does, it shows the stakes for act two. Also his arc UGH. From being a Dan parallel where he’s saying he’ll be perfect for her and that he wants who he knew and that he’ll stay anyway because he made a promise to,,, the dance and saying that he’ll stay bc he loves her and he doesn’t care if she goes crazy

- Also I think Natalie mouths ‘help me’ as she stops Henry from walking off in A Promise owwww

- also Henry apologising to the pianist after the recital (I think?) and picking up Natalie’s bag from the club 😭

[cringelordofchaos]

Disability + Queer headcanons for some South Park characters i like

(warning: u might not agree w everything i have to say !!! :shocked emoji:)

(also sorry if im inconsistent w some characters pronouns ill probably refer to a character with their canon pronouns in the show and then when i remember trans hcs of said characterr suddenly ill refer to the w different pronouns)

Craig Tucker

- gay (no fucking shit sherlock)

- level 1 autistic, low empathy, difficulties communicating and understanding emotions, yada yada u get the gist

- some form of anxiety? idk probs not to a disordered amount but its there.

Kenny McCormick

- Chronic pain (everywhere)

- Epilepsy

- dude LITERALLY got a seizure from simply playing a video game (in thepokemon episode) this dudes physical health is so bad prolly cuz his constant deaths still leave an impact on him even after he gets revived?

- autism !? (idk im not 100% sure just yet)

- selectively mute

- probably some form of (complex?) PTSD from the constant traumatizing deaths he endures though again like im not sure

- but yyeah ok i just remembered thispost is about disability AND queer hcs so uhm kenny. I like the genderqueer hcs but he could also just be really gnc and i love that for him too. either way likes women a lot and i cant exactly imagine him liking a dude? like idk maybe but nah i dont see it

Tweek Tweak

- im sorry but i personally dont view him as having adhd cuz his parents tell others hes hyperactive bc of it but really its because they keep drugging the fucking eight year old so idk. like idk he could possibly have it but i cant decipher cuz we dont know what tweek would be like if he wasnt drugged and a coffee addict at such a young age. and causes of symptoms matter

- but yeah he def has GAD and panic disorder bc of the drugged coffee

- oh also gay

eric cartman

- NPD (i know hes a really stereotypical and harmful portrayal of it and there should be better representation of it but theres no way he doesnt have it im sorry)

- sexuality and gender are whatever benefits him at the moment

(ok but if ur actually wondering abt my hc hes probably gay)(in extreme denial obviously though)

Butters Stotch

- has some form of disorder related to trauma and if he doesnt hell get one when he grows up because like dudes been through SOME FUCKING SHIT. (and he canonically falls asleep to and wakes up to the sounds of his own screams so like. uhm)

- seems like hes straight? like could be bi though idk. he DID have a crush on princess kenny though? take it as you will lmao

- SHIT i forgot about marjorine. yeah just like w kenny either genderqueer or gnc, love both hcs

- may i suggest aroace butters though

- or no sexuality butters (he doesnt have a sexuality :broke heart:)(dont aks me how that works it jst does)

Stan Marsh

- Major depressive disorder

- literal alcoholic at age 10 thats bound to mess him up for life one way or another

- canonically diagnosed with asperger's syndrome but it was his obvious depression being misdiagnosed

- bi but like only gay for specific chars. but yeah confused abt sexuality

- gender questioning too and its pretty canon as shown in 'the cissy'. though then again stans really empathetic so u could say stans confused feelings of gender identity were just being influenced by cartman and wendy recently telling the school theyre trans. idk WHICH way stans trans though and neither do they

- emo

kyle broflovski

- im gonna hes say asexual cuz of human kite's character chart thingy and also bc why not

- have got zero clue as to what his sexuality is like. im a style shipper (big surprise ik) so u might think i think he likes dudes but idk. ive never seen anyone hc him as aroace before but i think it could fit him. he does seem like he could just be cishet too. or maybe bi? ive also seen gay hcs of him. idk man i think multiple fit depending on how u interpret his character?

-

Tolkien Black

- his roleplay character chart thingy said ther character was gender neutral so im going w that hc

- likes girls (canon as shown in cartman finds love)

Bradly/Bradley (the one from the conversion therapy episode)

- gay (SHOCKER)(BIGASS SURPRISE)(

Timmy

- canon wheelchair user (whats the term again i forgor) and also intellectually disabled (but also there was one point where it was revealed he was actually a genius i think?? so maybe hes not intellectually disabled but rather he lacks the capacity to express or communicate his inner world? idk)

- timmy

thas all i got for now im too lazy to continue but yeah pls dont kill me for these

EDIT 11/JUNE/2024: forgot to say this but also kenny has more physical disabilities than listed and also Cartman is dyslexic in my hc

[lionmythflower]

HIIIIIIII!! What’s your Headcanons for Lizzie/Bunny/KittyMaddie. platonic or Romantic?? (Or really your Wonderlandian couple headcanons)

i STARTWD ANSWERING THIS AND THEN IT DIDN'T SAVE-

anyways imma js give u some headcanons if u want me to type what I was gonna put before I can but it was mainly js Abt who kissed who when

(I'm also including Alistair in their polycule bc why not lol)

Maddie rambles so much and their partners are the only ones who can understand them

lizzie made a bag for Alistair that works the same way as Maddie's hat :)

THAT ONE SCENE WHERE KITTY TRIES TO EAT EARL GRAY (Maddie's mouse) HAPPENS ON A DAILY BASIS 😭

(Justice for Earl Gray)

bunny would love graphic novels and Maddie would buy them for her

Alistair can also read an entire novel in a day and Kitty says it's terrifying

Also back to the graphic novel thing bunny's fav graphic novel would be the Tea Dragon Society by K. O'Neill (I'm projecting and I js got the rest of the tea dragon series)

Lizzie is great at drawing and does so many drawings of her partners<3

When ever one of them makes Lizzie flustered, she'll be like "off with ur head" while blushing furiously

Kitty has a very specific tree that they sit in all the time and when their partners can't find them anywhere else they look there

Maddie is genderqueer and Kitty is nonbinary and they both go by they/them pronouns :)

Alistair gives trans vibes idk

lmao there's no way that bunny and Lizzie are cis

I think bunny is genderfluid and Lizzie is bigender or smth like that

Maddie and Alistair both have ADHD

Lizzie is bipolar

And bunny is dyslexic and has autism (they go nonverbal sometimes and all her partners know sign language for when that happens)

Kitty has OCD

And both kitty and Alistair have apd bc I said so

Kitty will js curl up w their head in their partners lap when one of their partners are sitting

Maddie is the most affectionate and bunny is a close second

Bunny likes to turn into her rabbit form and js sit on her partners laps

They all have great music taste

But Maddie can't sing to save their life (but they still try to, bless their soul)

Kitty can't spell for shit and bunny's like "I'm the one with dyslexia? How come u can't spell???" And it's js bc they hardly passed elementary/primary school 💀

bunny is the one w all the half used or not even opened journals

Maddie brings the best snacks on road trips

Kitty js sleeps the whole time while they're on the road

Alistair is the designated driver bc the last time they let Maddie drive they ended up in monster high (how do u get THAT LOST that u end up in another universe mads-)

Lizzie is the the astronomy person in their polycule

She absolutely loves constellations :)

Maddie will js be like oh look at the moon!!! No matter what phase the moon is in at the time

And then Lizzie will inform them what phase the moon is in

The all cuddle a lot

Like 24/7

Thank you for ur time

^ that's the scene I meant (I could only find it in an edits so that's why there's words lol)

[stardustcleaningguy]

ok im back to rant abt more saverem twins autism things :P

in my last post (which if you havent seen, was me reblogging @dragons1re ‘s post about the plant powers as a metaphor for autism/autistic traits) i didnt really go into much detail about knives because i was a little too focussed in the fact there is another autistic vash truther out there .. but im gonna talk abt knives now.

like i said before i dont necessarily think that knives has enough control over his outbursts to really be completely proud of them, but also when you are the person known for having regular outbursts and are considered ‘dangerous’ or ‘weird’ by neurotypical society, it begins to become a part of how you view yourself as a person (or at least thats how it was for me as a kid - a lot of my autism hcs are based directly off my own experiences). i mean this in the way that once you have that impression established of you - that you are strange and offputting and scary - its very hard to overcome the perception of others and seem ‘normal’ and so you just kinda give up, and accept your role.

this is how knives’ behaviour appears to me, from an early age people have this perception that hes hard to deal with and has big outbursts of emotion which he struggles to control - and even when he DOES learn more ways to control it, he still refuses to mask because hes continuing to play into the general perception of him by neurotypical (aka human) society. he lets his emotions control him because he doesnt see any point in masking - i mean what would it change if he did try and act normal? the humans already know hes a dangerous monster freak right? i was only able to change from this mindset because my environment and the people around me changed but because of the magnitude of knives’ actions hes unable to do this - until the very end when he finds humans that dont just see him as a dangerous creature but an actual person who just wants safety for him and his brother (but then he gets appled so …)

also im not really saying that knives thinks of himself as a monster, he just knows that humans have that impression of him and instead of trying way too hard to appear normal like vash, he leans more into the role of ‘weird dangerous monster’. hes super scared of humans (the same way an autistic person may become fearful of neutotypical society because of the way they have been treated within it) so thats another reason why he has this whole im super dangerous and evil thing going on even though he spends most of his time napping. top 10 people comitted to the bit

idk this rant MIGHT have gotten a little too tangent-y and i MIGHT be projecting onto knives just a teensy little bit but it was fun to write so wuteva !!!!!!!! (also all of this is specifically discussing trigun maximum - i luuuuv maximum)

[tearsofcalamity]

wriofucker's fine by me lol unless u have another nickname that'd be both as accurate & funny!

i wasn't too clear earlier; i think our mandatory education goes up to 9th grade, and then it's like a minimum of 4(ish) years for a uni degree. so it's not all that different lol

nahh im telling you i had one macroeconomics class once and it fried my fuckin brain. only reason i could stand it was because the professor was too right-brained for his own good (he'd start his lectures with a song he liked. i wrote a bunch of barely-relevant shit abt environmental pollution on the exam—he was super passionate abt it—and he just let me pass<3 loved that guy). ik i said it before but good luck on ur studies!! im sure you'll absolutely kill it out there. and, thank sm! i actually finished the short story assignment last night but im too scared to submit it jdhdj

im so glad you've got more kaveh brewing omg he's so<33 bit of a shame you're not into kavetham (they make me bite & scream) but that's just fine; more kaveh/reader for the world! except the world is me and nobody else<3 can u imagine teasing kaveh in public, maybe he's even all nice & plugged up, and you're warning him not to let a single person figure out what's going on bc he's for your eyes only<3 but it's so difficult and you're relentless and it feels so, so good... he doesn't even care about people finding out anymore, but he wants to be a good boy for you... phew. lord have mercy

HAHA WRIOFUCKER IT IS THEN!! happy to have a named anon :D

ohhhh I see I see! okay yeah so it's pretty similar just a few differences! I think the only reason I'm surviving my business/econ work is cause I've got a math-wired brain lmfao. I've got autism ("high functioning" but I don't really like that term for it, I think the more acceptable one is "low support needs") and I got the "math autism" as my friends put it so that's probably a bigger part of it. I like making spreadsheets and working out equations HAHA, also thank you for the well wishes I actually just found out I passed calc 2 with an 82% so I'm very happy about that!! I'm glad to hear you got your short story done as well, sounds like you're moving through it all good <3!!

HONESTLY I don't hate the ships (like either kavetham or haikaveh I think they're different? like some shippers put the top's name first or something?? I'm not 100% sure) like I TOTALLY see the chemistry don't get me wrong, I think it's mainly just that I get so sad seeing like nearly 0 kaveh content without alhaitham included. I love both of them but kaveh's got such a unique and deep story too, yet people often just kinda treat him like an accessory to alhaitham likely cause he's 4 star and haitham is 5 star so it turns me off of the ships a bit </3 still though that's so true MORE KAVEH/READER!!!!

oh don't even get me started on teasing kaveh in public there's so many ways you could do it and each one would make him squirm more than the last... shove a nice little vibrator deep inside of him, remote controlled of course, and enjoy watching his knees practically buckle every time you up the intensity. ooh, maybe he's giving a one-time academic seminar for some kshahrewar students and you just stand in the corner, grinning at him all the while while he shakes and tries his best to keep his voice level, praying his face isn't as red as it feels...

or play around with him in the tavern, sit right next to him and brush your hand along his inner thigh while he squirms, not sure whether he wants to move closer or further way from you... this one's easier to hide since his flushed cheeks could easily be attributed to a bit too much to drink, but once he's grabbing at your wrist to push your hand into his bulge at last, he knows by your stare that he's messed up. I mean, he hadn't kept his promise to be good, had he? guess you'll just have to rail him over his workbench back at home when he least expects it! (totally ignore his needs/pretend he's not acting super horny when you get back at first, though, he'll be so good for you when you finally do bend him over)

[happyk44]

hiiii happy!!!! how do you feel abt jason's adhd? in my opinion, the books didn't really do a job illustrating it. how do you think it would manifest and affect him? i'd love to hear your opinion ☺️ i love you!!! 💖💓💗

Personally, I think of Jason as being autistic versus having ADHD. We know through Frank that having ADHD and dyslexia (both of which Frank does not have) is not an exclusive requirement to being a demigod. On top of that, Rick’s use of ADHD is not… great. My sister has been diagnosed with ADHD since she was five – she is very much the inattentive subtype, and I think Rick’s use of ADHD as a superpower of hypervigilance does sort of exclude people who primarily experience inattentive symptoms.

But those kinds of symptoms are not easily rewritten as “benefits” (which. yeah. It’s a disability), so I get why he didn’t include it. I remember reading a while back that when the books were first published, rewriting ADHD as a superpower/benefit to kids who had it was a common narrative, so, like, okay, but also. It’s been two decades.

But anyway. Jason. Yes! In general:

He gets easily distracted by different tasks, but to other people it just looks like he’s multitasking

He forgets to take care of himself a lot, forgets to eat, shower, drink water, sleep, talk to people and be social, etc

Auditory processing issues. During long speeches he starts to zone out because the sound eventually merges into all the other background noise he’s trying to filter out (wind powers and wolf vigilance amplifies the sound of everything) so he often encourages people to just get to the point and be upfront, and gets frustrated when people won’t. Also can’t stand people who talk in monotone (which is ironic because I think Jason doesn’t inflect or shift his voice very much)

Leo definitely uses his voice in various tones during conversation, so while Jason is like “oh my god, please stop talking in circles I have no idea what you’re saying”, it’s a lot easier for him to listen to Leo’s rambling monologues because he doesn’t speak in one or two tones

If it doesn’t interest him, the conversation can start to blur together as well because he struggles to focus on what’s being said. Fortunately, just because of how CJ and New Rome are structured, most topics at hand are things he likes (ancient Rome, gods, politics, etc). Unfortunately, Jason doesn’t really have strong human connections and his position as the golden boy of Camp Jupiter, champion of Juno, son of Jupiter, etc, etc, etc distances him from a lot of people so casual topics, like video games or TV shows, rarely get brought up to him in the first place

The onslaught of sensory issues makes it hard for him to focus. He’s taught himself how to filter things out, but it’s a constant practice to do and gets very tiring

Object impermanence – if he can’t see it, it doesn’t exist. Luckily for him, he doesn’t own a lot of things, but for things he has to keep tucked away in a drawer (like clothing), he slaps labels onto the container/drawer. Everything else, like the couple of misc trinkets he owns, he keeps out and obvious

One of things he does to help it avoid blending into the background is using sharp colour contrasts. So if its important – like medication or something, he might use a bright yellow basket on top of a black dresser or whatever because the yellow stands out so sharply it’s hard for the basket to blend into the background and so he remembers to take his meds.

Another thing is moving location. So he might move the basket from one side the dresser to the other and back again every so often

He’s pretty good at maintaining habits and routine (autism), but also if something happens that throws off the routine it takes months to get back on track and it is the worst thing ever, it is grueling and he hates it. Habits and routine are not innate, they are a constant active conscious choice he makes every day

Making plans can be difficult, even in battle or on quests when strategy is key. He can get tripped up on the small details and overlook the larger picture, or be so focused on the larger picture, he doesn’t see the small details. Because people have been so reliant on him for strategy, he’s more or less managed to get away with looking competent, but it’s always a competition with himself to remain on task, instead of narrowing into something that doesn’t matter

People will often comment on how fast he can get things done but its literally that he gets things done fast because sometimes he waits too long to do the thing (procrastination) and now he’s got like five seconds to the deadline, OR he has a burst of focus and gets that thing done as fast as he can before the executive function dips

He does get bored easily, so he'll flit between task to task, but it’s really that he needs stimulation, needs to be doing something, and if he’s not doing something, he’s losing his mind, and because he lacks a core sense of identity, he flits from task to task to find something that interests him (but there’s so little that does because he does not know who he is and he’s just mimicking people and it’s not the same)

Emotional dysregulation

He gets lost in his own head a lot. Part of it is just standard dissociation, but the other part is that his brain is always on, everything is firing at all cylinders, there is no quiet, it’s just noise and reminding himself of things he needs to get done on repeat, 24/7, loud as can be and he can't turn it off or lower the volume. His brain is full of bees and they won't stop buzzing

As a result, he probably has pretty bad insomnia

I think he has a lot of trouble getting stuff started. Body doubling encourages him to get started on stuff, and he’s never not been surrounded by at least one other person, so when he starts living alone in Cabin One after The Lost Hero, he is so confused that he can’t seem to force himself to pick up his shirt off the ground. And it just stays on the ground for days. Until he runs out of clean underwear and has no choice but to pick it up to get laundry started

He doesn’t own enough stuff to be fully disorganized, but if he does, he’ll have the most organized areas in his room ever, and then his closet is a mess because “well I don’t go in there a lot”

I think he tries to keep a spreadsheet/list of items he owns that he doesn’t use very often, but he still has doubles of a few things. Also so many batteries. He’s constantly like “I don’t think I have enough batteries” and then he buys the batteries and comes back, goes to update the list on the back of the door and it’ll be like “you have batteries. Stop buying batteries. There are too many batteries” and then he throws the batteries in the box that’s overflowing with batteries and forgets they exist again, but then, when he does need the batteries, it takes him so long to find the box

He would self-medicate on coffee if he didn’t hate the taste. He also doesn’t like soda. Or chocolate. So, you know, RIP to him. He’s rawdogging life. At least Leo can inhale caffeine like his life depends on it

He has the waiting mode problem, where if he has something scheduled at a certain time, it doesn’t matter how much time he has until that thing, he just. Waits. For the thing. Like he could get so much done in that time, but he can’t. Again, body doubling has helped, but living alone makes it so much harder

Reward systems don’t work with him. He doesn’t get the same sense of satisfaction that a neurotypical would after getting a reward after task completion. So when he absolutely needs to get something done but his brain is like “nah we gotta sit here and stare at this wall for seven hours while dissociating”, he just ends up screaming at himself a lot

Jason’s probably in a burnout so intense that if he took a minute to rest, his body and mind would shutdown for like three years.

He forces himself to get things done and screams at himself the entire time, and it hurts in a way he doesn’t understand but he has to do these things because there’s no other choice and people are relying on him.

Since he’s been groomed for leadership since day one, he’s never really had a chance to breathe that the other kids would get, so even when he finally has the chance to rest, it’s like his mind knows how unsafe that would be because shutting down completely would never be safe for him (trauma!!) so he just refuses to rest, which involves a lot of him getting lost in his own head or hyper-focusing on something (like spreading recognition of minor and forgotten gods) instead of. You know. Breathing

I think a lot of his issues with ADHD become more present after TLH when the quest is over and he’s alone. CHB has structure, but its not as narrow as Camp Jupiter’s routine and structure, and Jason lives alone, operates his own schedule, doesn’t really have other people to remind him of things, etc, etc, so the sudden shift makes him start to spiral a bit in his fears of incompetence.

It’s not that he’s incompetent, he’s very competent, but his problems were never as evident because other people had his back as he had theirs. He’s kind of like people w/ undiagnosed ADHD or autism who leave their support systems for university and suddenly school and life is the most difficult thing in the world, when before it was a lot easier

Timeblindness does affect him a lot, especially when he's doing something he enjoys. He wears a watch everywhere. And has a lot of backup watches

A lot of these probably overlap with autism but like, lol, I do primarily view him as autistic.

[fuckingstrange]

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| "I don't like myself that much. But I'm glad you do." — Personal Prompt |

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WARNINGS: Self-hating talk, Indications of possible Autism, talk of a not-so-kind mother, cussing, kissing, probably bad writing

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WORDS: 657

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Begging y'all to be nice (or not idk) and if you know me irl fuck off (kindly or just don't talk to me abt this)

You sit in bed, your head in Reid's lap as he soothingly strokes your hair while humming an unfamiliar song to fill the silence so that you don't get that annoying ringing in your ears. You've been laying there for about thirty minutes, trying to calm down from the stressful day at the bureau where the office was just a little bit too loud, a little bit too bright, and everybody was just a little too chatty. The odd buzz that was pulsing through your body that left you on the verge of tears thirty minutes ago has calmed down tremendously with the help of his soothing humming and the feeling of his fingers carding through your hair, so much so that you're able to space out and fall into a landfill of thoughts. They're not good by any means, but it's whatever.

Reid turns his head down to look at you, smiling in a slightly worried manner when he sees how zoned out you seem. "Penny for your thoughts, baby?" He says in a quiet tone, watching the way your eyes trail up to his and seeing how it takes a minute for your vision to focus in on him. "Hey there." He greets when you finally blink, an indicator that you're back from whatever rabbit hole of thoughts you fell down.

"..hm?" You hum in question, asking him to repeat whatever he said before. He smiles before moving his hand to poke the center of your forehead. "I offered you a penny for a chance to get an idea of what's going on in that racing mind." He says, hearing the way you hum softly as you think about it.

"..I was thinking about how much you seem to like me. I, frankly, don't like myself that much. But I'm glad you do." You respond, giving a light shrug as if the way you talk bad about yourself is normal. Sadly, it is, but Reid has been trying to break you out of that habit. "Oh." He reacts, making you raise an eyebrow as you wait for him to say something more. It takes a minute but he eventually whispers, "You know I don't enjoy hearing you talk like that about yourself." Pressing a hand to your cheek before he adds, "I find you very interesting."

"..Love, I'm not that interesting. I'm just some 28 year old dumbass-" You start, though he silences you with a kiss. He holds your lips against his until he feels you melt into it, letting it linger for another few seconds before pulling back enough that he can look into your eyes. "You're not as dumb as you think. You're pretty smart, you just have certain issues that make it hard for you to voice your words correctly." He says, the compliment making you feel a little bad that you even decided to say anything. Reid notices your uneasiness, moving his hand to cup the back of your head and pulling you in for another calming kiss. "You'll learn how to take a compliment, eventually, baby." He mumbles into the kiss, "And I'll make sure you're never treated anywhere near the way your mother did." He adds.

"..I just don't understand why you're so nice to me." You admit after he removes his lips from yours, hearing him sigh makes you start to feel like you're annoying him until he suddenly pulls you to sit up in his lap. "I'm nice to you because I actually love you. You're just not used to it, and I swear that's fine." He explains, his words putting you a bit more at ease. You rest your head on his shoulder, mindlessly beginning to play with the soft fabric of his plain brown shirt. You get so lost in the soothing feeling of the soft material in your hand that you barely notice when he begins to whisper sweet nothings in your ear.

[bitchin-tubs]

Complain time again tee hee but I’m just like UGHHHH talking genuinely to these ppl is SO hardddddd

With girl A, I spent almost a whole class lecture (friendly) debating with this one girl on why people medically diagnosed as psychopaths and sociopaths are not inherently dangerous, are not narcissistic by default and how ‘masking’ is not a form a manipulation. Her source for all of these… You. The Netflix show…

With girl B, I feel like she’s sooooo,,,, dismissive ?? Idk like I tried to introduce her to my friends once and she genuinely did not gaf. Like I said hi B this is C then she says hi to me and me only. Like my girl C is right here. But at the same time she’s always bringing me into her friend groups which is fine but I dont connect easily so most times I’m kinda just there SPECIALLY if it’s an all men group when I have specially told her I tend to be uncomfortable with men for “no” reason

I was having a conversation with girl A and the topic of autism was brought up, I told her that I think I may be low on the spectrum but there are some things I tend to relate to with autism behaviors, and considering opened up to me about her anxiety and how she had previously talked very openly abt diagnosis I thought maybe she’d get it. I know,,, self diagnosis (u are free to feel any type of way abt it) but idk I thought she’d have any type of nuanced comment about it but I should’ve known from the psychopath talk… I had told her that I find meeting new people very hard, I have difficulty talking to said people and I tend to be very restrictive about who I make a meaningful connection to. She said that my personality is and I quote “mamona” (jerk/snob/asshole ish) and completely dismissed my masking, overstimulation, 10 year old special interest, taking shit to literal and not understanding social cues or instructions as “just being different” yeah so I thought… yknow I might not have autism valid but idk I felt so ignored at that moment

Also don’t think I just unpack shit on her unannounced, we talk and convos play out as they usually do and since the topic was out I was like sometimes I wonder if I have it because of so and so plus she was unwinded with me before so it wasn’t impossible for us to talk abt personal stuff, even though we not so tight we are still close

Another thing I’m very bad at making friends, I think I mirror good enough to have nice interactions with people but not to the point they invite me to shit or talk to me outside of classes. Back when I was in my exchange program I was sharing a room with 3 swifties so I had to pretend to like Taylor swift so I wouldn’t feel singled out, I also watched the summer I turned pretty and witnessed these girls thirst over bad boy #2 when I thought the character was so shitty (the actor is good looking but I’m not attracted to him) and also would also unknowingly spend all-nighters on school nights (as in I didn’t know they were meant to be all-nighters) with them watching a movie I didn’t particularly like and see everyone thirsting over annoying man on screen (one of them was some straight outta wattpad step-sibling story ew, the other pride and prejudice IM SORRY YALL I DIDNT GET THE HYPE 😭 call me uncultured it’s okay

A and B are sólo also hardcore swifties and I can only be neutral abt her otherwise they get on my ass about it and saying I like Taylor swift or her music is too big of a lie even for me

I told girl A about this (or at least a bit) and she said that I should’ve just been me. Girl I can’t be me we were both witnessing a girl being actively bullied (tv show ass bullying they printed a picture of her and drew over it ugly, taped it to her dorm room. Still hurtful and bullying tho) I’m NOT about to ostracize myself

HOWEVERRR these are not my main friends, these are like the friends I made to not be lonely in these extra classes for an American 🦅🦅🦅 diploma. My close CLOSE friends are from my same career classes and they are so much more understanding and can interact more naturally with. So in my day to day I got good genuine friends by my side

I recognize that I can be perceiving these memories differently than how they actually happened, misinterpret their actions and just be in my feeling right now but idk I feel like I’m so difficult and constantly just have to comply with people in order to make others comfortable

[mobileexo-forceofthekoreanarmy]

Lore post ! I don’t know where else to put this but did you know that the Korean translation of Hana’s Academy cosmetic lore implies she actually won the world championship with D.Mon and King (presumably in a World Cup for team Korea; the latter was still her archrival likely on another team)? I’ve always assumed she beat out Kyung-soo, but the wording is so fundamentally different in Korean—in English, note that it says she surpassed both of these people to win (though we knew she was on the same team as Yuna). Below is a translation of the Korean version:

My partner is big into esports (and also just the best gamer I know LOL) and said that this actually makes the art from shooting star of D.Va kissing the trophy alone make more sense because it was likely an MVP award, which goes to just one person in a competition. So, yes her stats and prestige likely outranked King and D.Mon (surpassed them, if you will) but they played together? And during the regular season were probably on separate teams hence the “arch rivalry”.

And all of this is supported by her canon Taegeukgi skin, which states explicitly that she represented Korea worldwide! And Michael Chu saying (his words) that her and King were “neck-in-neck” rivals makes sense when you consider they likely won the same worldwide titles together on the Korean team.

I think it’s crazy how different the wording is between the two translations and that King and D.Va actually have shared history. I’d love to know what that meant for their rivals dynamic and if they were potentially friends before MEKA? Maybe I’ll draw something. Also this basically confirms that neither Overlord nor Casino played the same competitive game (Mecha Guardian V) as the rivals and Yuna. (Jae-eun was likely never a pro gamer guys I’m sorry gamer casino truthers but formula 1 is a full-time gig and since they’re likely around 23-24 it’s improbable that they did both 😭😭) + lots of little hints imply Seunghwa actually played StarCraft! If they played MGV, they would likely have also been mentioned in the lore blurb as they would also have been top Korean players who represented the country.

This is probably a bit silly but I thought somebody else might find it cool maybe? We have such limited explicitly-stated MEKA lore so I like to synthesize 🩵💕 maybe I’ll do it on something else sometime. And if you want me to talk about another MEKA-squad related topic or compile info abt it my ask box is open for others with worms in the brain LOL

Also hi :] I’m back on this account 😭 since my last post I found out I have autism and also have come to terms w the MEKA squad being my special interest for years now so I hope to be a lot more active. Idk if this goes anywhere but I’d love a space to post abt this stuff and am carving out this one ♡

[princes-creations-askblog]

Finally posting oc content again bc I can’t hold it back anymore <3

Ok so I have this set of ocs (I’ve talked abt them before in this post right here) and uh. I’m remaking them now. or trying to, I’m having bad writer’s block hngh—

So like. Now that I’ve exploded and absolutely NEED to post them or I’ll die, I’ll give you some basic info on them :)

I’ve renamed Jay to Jeiviin. They’re a six-year-old Sky Dragon born and raised in Emporia, having lived in Taldrena their whole life (up until an incident in which they ended up in Voxtren). They’re intersex and were raised genderless, and have an older sister.

I’ve renamed Cora to Avaki. She’s a seventeen-year-old Sky Dragon that was born in Talix, one of Emporia’s islands, and moved to Taldrena with her family when she was 8. She’s Jeiviin’s older sister, and really into true crime.

I’ve renamed Sigasi to Sivea. She’s a fourteen-year-old Healer Dragon born in the Philippines, but moved to Emporia (specifically Voxtren) when she was 11. She’s an only child, but became best friends with Jeiviin and Avaki after the events of her (and the other characters’) story takes place, and she’s surprisingly feisty for a Healer.

I’ve renamed Delta Sun to Astrallon. They’re somewhere around 150-160 years old, and they’re an Angel from the Concept Universe (or the Void). They left their home when they were in their 20s to search for their missing mother (idk what happened to her though), but they never found her, and instead decided to just. Stay in Emporia. I mean, it’s a really pretty country, so. Fair enuf.

None of them have designs yet, but I have some very basic ideas for what I want them to look like —

Jeiviin will be pretty short (I mean they’re 6 so ofc), and their main colour will definitely be blue. Lotta scars.

Avaki will be more seafoam green I think? And a lot taller. Possibility of being emo or scene

Sivea is so so purple. I kinda want her to resemble a violet-backed starling. I love those fucking birds. I want her to have a sorta medieval-goth-princess aesthetic, but more modern

Astrallon gets to be tall as hell. Way taller than they need to be. Get enlarged stupid. And I want them to have some vague religious vibes, like biblically accurate or something. Perhaps multiple sets of wings, or too many halos. Or too many eyes.

Ok now that that’s out of the way.

Storyline thing or something!

The kiddos are still both gonna be experiments — that was an integral part of their story before the remake, and I don’t wanna change that — but Astrallon won’t be an experiment anymore. Instead, they’ll be friends with the guy running the experiments, but they won’t know about it until he calls them up and says “DUDE WE’RE GETTING FUCKED UP PLEASE HELP”.

The experiments aren’t gonna be turned into some form of superhuman (superdragon?) beings anymore, either. Instead, the cult is trying to transform Dragons into Humans by surgically removing their Draconic traits and making them physically look as human as possible.

Those experiments never end up working and all the subjects that went through the procedures died. Including Jeiviin. But they get to come back as a ghost, because I said so.

Anyway!! The reason Mr. Cult Guy calls Astrallon screaming for help, is because Sivea and the other still-living experiments broke out and started killing motherfuckers. As they should.

Astrallon is a very kind person, so of course, they immediately run over to their friend’s location to help, and promptly get their shit FUCKING WRECKED by Sivea, who thought they were another cultist.

Some other stuff happens after that, and then the story ends, but I haven’t gotten to that point yet. As I said, I’m having writer’s block atm, so I can’t get past the part where Sivea starts plotting.

Also, despite the setting of this story being in Emporia, which is also where my AHiT AU takes place, this is not set in the AHiT universe! It’s an entirely original work, full of the blorbos from my autism.

I am tired and can’t think of anything else to write, so that’s it post’s over. Eat up

[twinknote]

murder your memory by title fight but it’s murder your Mommy

my mom is so fucking weird and ironically often very spot on about our relationship when she’s trying to joke with me

on wednesday, she used the tortellini i had bought to make pasta salad as basically my only lunch for the week bc she didn’t plan anything to take to her friend’s house. this made me Really mad bc 1. she didn’t ask me 2. i spend a lot of time and energy meal planning 3. i have a Lot of anxiety abt food bc ED recovery + ARFID + autism + lifelong food insecurity and 4. it takes me a Lot of energy just to pick up an online order and put it away

so i ended up having to go to one store, find out they’re out of stock, and go to Another store, which took Hours. the next day, i started making the pasta salad, realized that she had used the entire bottle of dressing i had bought for it, and nearly had a meltdown over it in the kitchen. she came to “comfort” me and said she’d go to the store to get more the next day. she joked “i’m really screwing you over this week, huh?” to which Past evan would have comforted and reassured her. but Present evan just went 😬 which like Good for him tbh bc this Did very much fuck up my week

anyway this morning the cycle continues, she’s trying to be all buddy buddy and get my reassurance while also trying to get me to feel bad for her. again, jokingly, she comes into the kitchen saying “did you peel the rest of the eggs for me? if you loved me, you would peel the eggs for me” laughing with her head on my shoulder, as if she doesn’t Always weaponize shame against people to do things for her. reminds me of a time she jokingly told me i was “gaslighting” her which like. girl if i’m gaslighting you’re a nuclear fucking bomb

and then she made sure to complain to me about going to the store Two days in a row (bc she Chose to go yesterday to buy eggs?) which is like. Ok cool 👍 i go to two stores in one day every week bc i’m the only one who buys groceries, and then had to go to two stores Again two days later bc you used my food 👍 That’s Awesome 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍

anyway thank god for therapy and people talking abt manipulative emotionally abusive narcissistic parents (and i use the term narcissistic to describe a self centered quality of her actions and thought patterns, Not to hypothesize that she has NPD) bc i’m now able to Choose not to reassure or comfort her when she’s being “i’m surely the worst person alive but i won’t straight up apologize” and “Woe is me i have suffered more than jesus christ, pls pity me or i will Die”

[crazylittlejester]

time-master sword anon

ok so I’m projecting my experiences onto time again 😭

so um one time I was in pe in 6th grade and one kid said to someone I was friends with saying “ is (insert irl name here) special? Like in an autistic kind of way?” And then the person I was friends with told me and I was like “🤡” (I haven’t gotten an autism test yet but there a high likelihood I do have autism)

anyways that would happen to Time, no doubt abt it 🫶

(also istg i have another au for Lu but their x men characters and istg there’s a relationship between two characters that is so time and warriors coded it’s actually insane)

i had a crazy similar experience when i was in high school- also im sorry that happened, they seemed like they said/meant that in a negative way, and being autistic is awesome so that was mean (<- source: I am autistic)

ALSO WHICH X MEN CHARACTERS 👁️👁️

[super-psycho-lov3]

do you know of any resources talking about bpd symptoms or like. accurate self tests for bpd? i’ve been sort of suspecting i might have it but i want to do my research first (if not thats totally ok and sorry if this ask is rude! just asking bc you said something in another post about being informed/doing a lot of research on personality disorders?)

HEEEYELLO YES SIR I DO!!! GIVE ME ONE SECOND!!! SO: for context, we have BPD and NPD with some traits of HPD and StPD and have hyperfixated on PDs before while having a special interest on psychology in general, especially when it comes to our own disorders :3 but of course i can give some resources!!

if you want to send another anon, i dont mind you getting more specific — i.e. what in particular tipped you off, anything that makes you doubt yourself about the ascertain, etc!! if you like i can also give my own run down of bpd and any other PDs, tho i will be straightforward if i Do Not Know That Much or don't know Enough!!

but you can also reply, reblog, or dm me if thats easier or more comfortable with you!! i really do love helping people learn abt PDs :3 autism go brrr