#anon: be good to yourself

[kvothes]

going forward, how do i know the difference between digging myself in deeper and digging my way out?

the city / empties itself tonight. lightning stages this perfect // vacancy like so many camera flashes. / for a moment, you are famous. even god / is looking for you.

[naughtybg3confessions]

My whole 21 years here on Earth I was sure of my straightness. Why has Astarion ruined this? It started with the bite scene giving me a boner and now I’ve jerked off to him more times than I’d like to admit. Am I gay now?

[canisalbus]

As I sit here tending to a nosebleed I think about how that was the first picture I saw of your characters. His open, almost casual self loathing resonated with me. So much of people with "gross" physical traits seeking love is explored only in metaphor, but here is art that shows it without shame.

Your dogs make me feel like a real human being. Thank you.

.

[shepherds-of-haven]

Ya see, im a loser, aight, lol. I basically replay this game over and over, and i gotten so good at gaining stats, im stronk af in the game. And what im upset about, tho, is that because my character is so strong and competent and skilled, they dont really get hurt lmfao. Now, some might be saying, but that is a good thing?! Aint it?! And you would be correct! Except im delulu, and i love the scene where Blade gets all angry that MC got bit by that fish with acid blood lolololol. I gotta relearn how to not be such a strong character so i can live my delulu dream lmfaooooo.

MC when you consider their stats:

MC when there's a cute RO to play damsel in distress for nearby:

[lemonhemlock]

I did not get into Game of thrones when it first started airing. In fact, I waited until it was long past it's heyday (around s6 or 7) to check it out because the marketing and the conversation surrounding it misled me into thinking it was nothing more than "grimdark" bullshit. As one famous YouTuber sarcastically called it "hot fantasy that fucks." So, I avoided Martin's work for literal years due to the impression that I got from online reactors and show-only casuals who did as you and a few others have described as his work being fundamentally misinterpreted.

Fortunately, I overcame my hang-ups, purchased the books (even the supplementary material) and fell down an entire rabbit hole of ASOIAF which led me to recognizing that this world he spent decades creating is far more complex than what had been portrayed onscreen. Regardless of the possibility of the books remaining unfinished (which I am fine with, personally), what George has created is a genuine work of art that I imagine took a tremendous amount of time and energy. So, for so many people online to behave like children and throw tantrums because they feel entitled to him (ew) instead of ushering forth more reasonable conversations and legitimate debates about the nature of his situation frankly makes me look at this fandom with a heavy dose of skepticism.

It is truly baffling to hear even professional critics and see articles describing George as being "ungrateful" or "unprofessional" when it has been well-documented just how often authors get locked out of the adaptation process and left to the wayside as consultants. Look at what happened to Rick Riordan and Christopher Paolini! George R.R. Martin is not the only author to have qualms with how a multimillion dollar studio has mishandled his creative work, and to act like he should remain silent just because he's amassed a certain degree of wealth is quite frankly, ridiculous. He shouldn't have to settle down, be grateful, and stay quiet because the greedy corporate executives and their media drones will get offended by actual criticism that could alter the perception of the adaption being revealed as mediocre for having departed from the source material.

TLDR: authors should be allowed to speak up about their art being sacrificed for commercialization.

Thank you so much for this message, anon! This needs to be talked about more, because I don't think a lot of commentators truly understand the vulgar, late-capitalistic sheen that seems to set in and slowly poison any ASOIAF adaptation. It honestly baffles me how quick some members of this fandom are to rush to the defense of, what is essentially (let's not be kidding ourselves here), a cashgrab by a giant corporation to the detriment of the actual artist and the actual creative foundation behind it.

Why else would "MAX" (if that is even their name) make another (or several other) ASOIAF adaptations? Not to stay true to any philosophical aesthetic vision, as it has become more than apparent with Season 2, but to increase shareholder profits by appealing to the lowest common denominator. Even the basic premise has been shifted in order to address popular trends and satisfy the mindless consumer that doesn't want to engage with anything deeper than their favourite tropes, prettily packaged:

from a story about a doomed ouroborous family superimposed on the pitfalls of feudalism, with villainy and heroism to be found on both sides, it has been simplified and reduced to a narrative that exalts white feminism and disqualifies anyone who opposes its girlboss protagonist. This is Sheryl Sandberg's version of Fire and Blood.

Truly, I think Sara Hess did (unintentionally) outline it the best: "civilians don't matter in Game of Thrones". They don't matter in Game of Thrones, but they matter in A Song of Ice and Fire. The entire heart of the series is contained in Septon Maribald's speech. The writers "kind of", must have forgotten, though.

[significant-narratives]

i need to hear more about this natemac wanting to kidnap mitchy at any possible moment

nate wanting to kidnap mitch comes from this interview excerpt from when they went to worlds together in 2017:

you can read the full article here

there's also this post that has some more moments of the two of them interacting, if you're curious!

[little-pup-pip]

Hi!

I don't know how much fandom stuff you make, outside of requests, but if you ever have time, could you please make a fnaf puppet-inspired moodboard? None of mine look very good and yours are a lot cooler :)

Here you go!!

[bloggingboutburgers]

Was it ever tough for you when you first realised you were aroace? Stuff like questioning if you're actually aroace or not. I just turned 17 and realised that I was aroace a few months back but I still can't help but question myself at times. Mainly cause I don't really relate with some aroace stereotypes and that just makes me feel like an outsider I guess. Was it ever like that for you?

Aaah... Not really, I guess TwT I'm very much sex-repulsed and romance-repulsed, so... I guess I got lucky in that way, it makes it way easier to be certain about my orientation I'm sure. Considering I was bullied in the years before finding myself out, I also already felt like an outsider, so I guess it wasn't a concern for me so much as a given parameter... So... I make self-affirmation sound easy but I think it's also because I have it easy, personally. My own experience makes it so that I don't have much room for doubt... But I can only imagine it's not as easy for most people.

With that said... It might be idealistic thinking but I still firmly believe no one can call the shots about yourself except yourself, so please don't forget that! And... I hope that nonetheless you can find other aroaces you relate to, even if it's only in part, so you can feel more validated for being who you are, the way you are!

[rootspiral]

Thank you so much for your detailed episode analysis! I especially appreciate this most recent post (ep. 4 part 7) with the in-depth REGRET section. As someone who was dating an Agatha-type, it's very vindicating to see people calling Rio the responsible one here... Sadly, it just not a salvageable situation without a lot more growing than Agatha has time or inclination for!

Anon - thank you for sharing, I've been sitting with this ask for two days now and thinking about it a lot. First of all, I'm sorry you went through a relationship of that kind.

This show is excellent in the way it portrays Agatha as a deeply sympathetic character while not letting her get away with any of her bullshit. Rio has been trying and trying and trying to fix Agatha but it's clear that she won't ever be able to do it, that Agatha has to put the work in herself. Their relationship was a very happy parenthesis that was never going to last because Agatha is simply too much of a mess. If it weren't for Nicky, something else would have eventually pushed her to the edge. I really believe that if Billy hadn't showed up and Rio had managed to win Agatha back, their relationship would have crumbled in some other way.

"Coven two" is a lovely concept but it's just not sustainable. It didn't work for Rio and Agatha - why else would Agatha have sought to add a child to their family? It's not like they had unprotected sex that one time. And then it didn't work for Agatha and Nicky. It won't work for Agatha and Billy either, unless she makes a real effort to change her behavioral patterns. Rio and Agatha had a deep and romantic codependent relationship, they were literally the only person in each other's world, and how could that ever be enough? Agatha's unhappiness stems from her loneliness, from being a covenless witch, Rio will never be enough to fulfill that void no matter how hard she tries.

It's heartbreaking really because Rio loves her SO much. She understands better than anyone why Agatha is the way she is, she is going above and beyond trying to help, and by doing so she's making herself smaller and diminishing her own pain, because Agatha's pain must be bigger and more important. I'm so glad she snapped in the end and they had a good fight over it, it was high time. Agatha's well being cannot rest on Rio's shoulders only, the ball has to go to Agatha's court now and she will have to change and make amends if she wants things with Rio to work out, there's no other way. She has been cruel and unfair to Rio for too long, she has been punishing her for what was never Rio's fault in the first place.

In order for Agatha to change she has to make a concrete effort toward it and she has to have a support system in place, both of these aspects are crucial, one cannot work without the other. Only then she may have a real chance to - well, not to win Rio back because that fool is too much in love and will be hers forever. But it might be enough for their relationship to work out in the end.

Mind you, I want them to work out because they're fictional and wish fulfillment. If I had a real life friend in Rio's situation I'd tell them to get the hell out and prioritize their own well being.

[eliotbaum]

hi! Will it be possible to book an order in your shop and take it in person in Vienna? 👉👈

gasp. yeah sure why not! karlsplatz deal let's go

[rooksblvd]

oh to be loved by yuji

In honour of the fandom's collectively adopted child's birthday. In my head, Shibuya never happened. In my head, Yuji is happy. Call me Fushiguro Megumi, because I am irrevocably in love with Itadori Yuji too.

who gives you the best hugs

who is a major ass cuddler

who will hit a spider with a slipper if you're scared of it and then secretly have a mental breakdown over it when he realises that it must've had a family

who takes you on onsen dates

who insists on helping you wash your hair and more

who breathes in the scent of your hair whenever he thinks you're asleep (on him of course)

who's procrastibakes pies so good that make you want to inhale them all in

who cooks and looks hot while doing it

who will bring you flowers out of the blue because why not

whose love language is playing bread & fred with you

who is big fucking tease

"I love you" "Say it again" "Ugh, you're fun, I guess" "You guess? Damn do you slander everyone you supposedly fall in love with?" "Nope, you get special rights" "Oh? What else can I get away with then?" "What do you want to get away with?" A cheesy grin spreads across his face and you realise you might have screwed yourself up, uh oh!

who absentmindedly caresses your thumb when your hands are intertwined

who will play dumb only to rile you up and then make up by kissing you all over

who gets away with almost everything and yes, that might have to do with how he's a little cute

who insists you match outfits on movie nights

who will go on a rant mid movie about how poor the visual effects are and then spend the next half pestering you to explain how the plot developed in the time he was ranting

who asks for consent every time he kisses you, no matter how long you are together, he will look for a sign of permission every single time

who buys you the most random of things because they reminded him of you

who is just as good a listener as he is a yapper

who puts on the slayest of bangers when he cooks/bakes with you (Livin la vida loca being one of them)

who follows the sidewalk rule religiously

[wispscribbles]

hi i just discovered your beautiful art so i obviously needed to scroll down your whole blog to catch up on everything you posted haha

i just wanted to say that i got way too emotional after reading that post of yours regarding mw3 and your mental health… on one hand i’m so sorry that you felt that way, but on the other i feel it with my whole heart

ghoap content especially for me helped me these past few months with my mental health in ways i would never have expected, it was my solace and inspiration, i started working out too and got back into drawing, got a lot better at it as well!

but unfortunately i get way too fixated on fictional stuff and there comes a time that my brain switches up and connects the things i liked and comforted me with things that make me extremely uncomfortable and stressed out, especially if i fall down a fandom rabbit hole that i would never have searched up, beacuse i know myself, i know my limits and triggers but i feel like i’m not a part of the fandom if i don’t like and interact with every single headcanon, art and ship

these past days i was really down because of that, and the things i read (why did i do that???) and now when i think of ghoap i think of that stuff and im scared that i alienated myself from the one thing that made me happy

but discovering your art and with that your post reminded me that im not alone in these feelings, even if it’s not the same exactly, and i wanted to thank you, for sharing your thoughts that time i guess haha <33

((sorry for rambling))

Long reply under 'keep reading' !! CW: talk of triggers and MCD

Always feel free to ramble my way!!! How nice you could find some comfort in my art and ghoap stuff. Especially in my mw3 post. I've been considering deleting it a few times, but hearing it maybe helped to read in some way makes me happy I left it up.

I get where you're coming from - I very much use these fictional characters as a safe space, but ppl view them very differently. There's room for it all, "don't like, don't interact" is very much a policy I agree with. It's important to mute words and be aware of your own triggers as you browse stuff in this fandom, because there's such a wide variety of stuff out there. You do NOT have to interact and agree with every thought people have on this ship, that's impossible and super stressful. There's plenty of stuff and headcanons I don't vibe with. There are no 'requirements' that you have to meet in order to enjoy fiction.

It's part of why I enjoy ghoap - that their dynamic resonates and has sparked so much creativity and outlets for so many - but it also means there's gonna be a lot of stuff u don't necessarily agree with or feel comfortable with. For example, a lot of folks use the MCD in mw3 as a way to explore grief, which I think is really cool, but on a bad day that could potentially get my brain in a bad headspace, so I only check out that art and those fics when I feel okay. There's also a bunch of stuff I'd never want to interact with, and that’s fine !!

I'm personally quite vanilla and a sucker for exploring the softer, more domestic aspects of these characters. It's what brings me joy. I know there are parts of this fandom who don’t vibe with what I make at all, and would call it untrue to the characters. Some creators enjoy exploring the more violent or toxic sides to the source material. That's just how it is, we all need different things from fiction. As long as we're capable of chilling in our respective sandboxes, then all's good.

But if you're like me, and enjoy the softer things, then definitely be aware and careful while exploring this ship and fandom. I've seen takes on these characters that are so far removed from how I view them, that they're basically the complete opposite, and it can leave a very bad taste, especially if you're the type to hinge your safe space on fiction.

Just... be mindful of yourself and your potential triggers, be respectful and don't interact with things that make you uncomfortable to the point of feeling unsafe. Shape your own online experience to your best ability.

Hope you're doing okay and still find joy in ghoap <3

[total-drama-brainrot]

TD World Tour AU, where Noah doesn't tell Owen that Alejandro is an eel in London... In Area 51, Noah is accidentally splashed with an alien truth potion (which wears off after a few days) and he talks to Owen... Owen asks Noah what he truly thinks about Alejandro, and Truth-Potion Affected Noah says this: "I have mixed feelings for Alejandro. He's a brilliant, interesting guy and I like him, but I don't trust him. He's like a slippery eel dipped in grease, swimming in motor oil. Basically, Heather with social skills. Wait a minute, why am I telling you this?!"... What if Alejandro secretly heard Noah call him all those conflicting things + Alejandro also learns that Noah is affected with an alien truth potion? 👽

Alright, you got me. I'm an absolute sucker for truth potion plots, especially when the character(s) effected by them are usually either pathological liars or incredibly secretive- of which Noah absolutely falls into the second category, given he shares so little personal information.

I'll gloss over why Noah declined to shit-talk Alejandro in London (though there's so many ways this change in behaviour could be justified) since the focal point of this hypothetical centred around their time in Nevada, so let's start from the beginning of the Area 51 challenge.

Area 51:

Before we start, it'll have to be established that no one was eliminated in London. Let's say that the majority vote went towards Duncan (team CIRRRRH voted him out immediately because they found his re-admission to the competition unfair, I guess. I imagine he'd also vote himself, if not as a plan to escape the competition he'd been actively skiving from, then just as an act of spite) but Chris instead claimed it was a rewards challenge- much like he does in Greece- because he doesn't want to let Duncan slip away again so soon.

I see no reason to alter the first part of the challenge- the sneaking into Area 51 portion- since team CIRRRRH's course of entry is fairly straightforward. Noah's presence doesn't make much of a difference to how it would play out; the majority of them throw their rocks and run, Owen gets lasered over the fence and Owen-napped, ect ect.

When both teams have managed to make their way into the Black Box Warehouse, Noah immediately suggests they should prioritise rescuing Owen. Tyler's quick to agree, since he's a firm believer in the "no man left behind" mentality (and he probably makes a not-so-subtle jab towards Noah for his chance of tune compared to London, where both he and Owen did leave Tyler behind) leaving Duncan and Alejandro to split from the group- Duncan in search of Gwen, and Alejandro just takes the opportunity to finally be free from his 'incompetent teammates' and prioritises finding an artifact.

Noah and Tyler come across the contraption Owen's trapped in, Tyler punches it in a futile effort to break it open, and the face hugger cube drops into Noah's hands. This is where the point of divergence comes into play; Tyler has his E.T. moment with one of the face huggers, but Noah- who's a tad bit more observant than Alejandro, and used to dodging surprise attacks from his various older siblings (and Izzy)- anticipates his own face hugger attack and promptly starts a game of cat-and-mouse with a taser alien hot on his heels.

The commotion of which attracts the rest of his team. Alejandro and Duncan arrive on the scene to see Tyler being electrocuted by an alien and Noah running in circles evading another.

Duncan attempts to rip the face hugger from Tyler's face, finding success at the cost of sending Tyler trampling into Owen's captive contraption (essentially taking Alejandro's canonical place in this scene) and inadvertently freeing Owen.

Meanwhile, Alejandro swipes up the nearest box he can find and snags the alien chasing Noah, who's still very loudly panicking as he flees, and succeeds! The alien is swiftly captured into the box, netting team CIRRRRH their artifact, and Noah promptly goes careening into the nearest tower of junk in his face hugger-fuelled hysteria. This causes another box to topple from the peak of the tower, landing directly on Noah's head and spilling its contents onto the bookworm- glass vials filled with a mysterious, luminescent cobalt blue liquid shatter into pieces drenching Noah in whatever they contained. (i.e. truth potion.)

Owen has his false-amnesia moment, characterised by his Joker makeover, and Alejandro enacts his revenge post-hypnotic suggestion after being addressed as "Al" one too many times.

Noah, understandably, swiftly objects to Owen's treatment and demands that Alejandro snap him out of it. Alejandro concedes, and Owen's brought back to himself. At least, for a moment, before the fatigue of having his mind messed with sends Owen into near-catatonia (the same as canon), meaning he has to be ferried through the Warehouse and back to the Jet by Alejandro and Duncan.

Things carry on canonically from there; Noah's just sort of there for the most part, though there'd be a minor hint to his newfound proclivity for honesty. Something along the lines of him giving an uncharacteristically honest answer to Owen as to who he's voting- Tyler, of course, since he was the one who ultimately threw the challenge for them... and also because Tyler still holds some resentment towards Noah for what happened in London, and Noah feels guilty about it every time he looks at the jock. Wait, why did he say that?

Sometime between this and the elimination scene, Noah wipes the truth-goop off of himself, but not before the effects have already started.

Tyler's voted out, yada yada yada.

The Jet:

Thus begins the start of "Picnic at Hanging Dork". Team CIRRRRH, consisting of just Alejandro, Duncan, Owen and Noah, are slumming it up in the Economy Cabin. Alejandro tries to rally his team by asking how to break apart Courtney and Heather's tentative co-operation. Owen suggests having Alejandro seduce Heather, since it worked for both Bridgette and Leshawna. Duncan makes his "Babe Olympics" comment. Noah pipes up that playing with someone's feelings is pretty scummy, even for someone competing for a million dollars.

Alejandro takes Noah's reluctance towards his methodology poorly; he hadn't spoken up before, when Alejandro had utilized the same strategy against other girls- and even Owen noticed that, so surely Noah did too- so why was he to outwardly against him using the same tricks? Duncan agrees, and offers ''his'' idea of having Alejandro flirt with Courtney to throw both her and Heather off their games (since Heather has an obvious crush on Alejandro), and things follow canon.

Then, the scene between Alejandro and Courtney happens. Noah scoffs at the display from the side lines, prompting Owen to ask him why he's so against Alejandro's plan.

"I mean, you never said anything before, when he flirted with Bridgette and Leshawna." Owen comments, light-hearted in nature but with an underlying questioning tone.

Noah's eyes flicker with a cobalt glow, easily mistaken for a trick of the light, and he speaks without even thinking.

"Yeah, because I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. Bridgette was happenstance, and Leshawna's whole deal could've been a coincidence, or some massive misunderstanding. But this?" Noah extends an accusing hand out towards a smug looking Alejandro, then pans it over to a flattered Courtney, "He's outright toying with Courtney's feelings after she was cheated on in front of an international audience. It's scummy."

Owen nods in understanding, momentary contemplation evident in the pouted curve of his lips, and he chimes in.

"Does that mean you don't like Al?"

"I never said that."

"Well, how do you feel about him, then?"

Again, a flash of blue light against the hickory backdrop of Noah's eyes, and he responds thoughtlessly.

"I guess I have mixed feelings about him. On the one hand, he's slippery, like an eel dipped in grease, swimming in motor oil. He's like if you took all of the worst aspects of Heather, wrapped them up in a pretty package, and gave them social skills..." He holds his hands out before him in a scale-like manner, with the left tipped downwards and tie right raised by his chin. Then, the two hands swap positions.

"And on the other hand, he's brilliant. I've never met anyone as talented as Alejandro; he's smart, he's athletic, he's funny. It's almost unfair just how perfect everything about him is- even his face is perfect. It's ridiculous! Infuriating, even. It's so hard to dislike him, even when I know he's bad news, but that doesn't mean I trust him."

Owen stands slack jawed beside his best friend, both impressed and stunned at the raw honesty of Noah's tirade. Noah, now a little more aware of himself, realises that he's said more than he intended to- more than he thinks he's ever spoken in one go throughout the entirety of Total Drama. He's not usually one for speeches, after all, let alone honest ones.

He's always been the type to play his cards close to his chest, so why...?

"I, uh, didn't mean to go off like that."

And he also didn't mean to admit it, either. What was going on?

The look Owen gives him is, in a word, vivid. The blonde has a shit-eating grin stretching across his face, a sort of elated smugness practically glowing from his features.

"Sounds like someone has a cruuuush!~"

What? No? No! Not at all, where would Owen even get that idea?!

Noah splutters to correct Owen's assumption (to disastrous results, because he does sort-of has a crush on Alejandro, so the truth potion doesn't allow him to outright deny it), and in his preoccupied state he misses how a calculating pair of sage green eyes never seems to stray from him.

Alejandro has a lot to think about in regards to a certain cynic, it seems.

[pianokantzart]

Given the objectively correct results of the Smash Bros. Sexyman contest, how do you think Luigi(and Mario too, why not) would go about rejecting someone? I think it’s time to start being realistic with myself and accept that both bros would visibly wince at the mere sight of me 🥲

Nah, Mario and Luigi have encountered some of the wildest looking freaks conceivable. If I know anything, it's that they are not going to wince at the sight of someone who isn't conventionally attractive.

But as far as rejection goes, I think Luigi would go about it very carefully. He appreciates the sentiment, but would feel the need to gently explain why he doesn't return the feelings, taking every precaution to ensure whoever's crushing on him walks away with as few hurt feelings as possible. He would then proceed to feel bad about it all day. Mario has less tact. He wouldn't feel any pressure to explain himself, but he would make it clear the entire time that– though he doesn't return the romantic feelings– he still highly values that person as a friend.

[castielsprostate]

like. it’s lovely that you’re enjoying the deadpool/wolverine shipping. but it’s still a marvel movie. i thought we were supposed to be boycotting marvel bc they have an israeli character?

hm. i already spoke about this but im just gonna be honest. you cannot deprive yourself of every. single. fucking. thing. and i am so fucking tired of policing people that are already doing shit for enjoying a single thing that isn't even involved with it.

i dont really talk a lot about what i do, because i dont think i have to justify how i live my life (something about good people dont have to brag about how good they are), but im already boycotting mcdonalds, im already boycotting starbucks, sodastream, burger king, phillips, airb&b, as much of nestle as possible, and every other company i can reasonably boycott. im donating to fundraisers and pleas for help. i donate to the pcrf. i donate to demining ukraine. i donate to greenpeace and a national cancer fund. i go to protests and demonstrations, i participate in community efforts, i share resources and fundraisers and verified information. im rallying for voters, i'm involved in my local community's green party. you dont see what i, or my friends, or other random internet users, are doing behind the scenes.

i am stretched fucking thin, my bank account is dwindling to keep up with everything. im going through insane health scares right now, chronic pain, anxiety so severe i want to fucking die, and a major chronic depressive episode to top it all off, i. am. exhausted.

you cannot deprive yourself of everything because when you do, there'll be nothing left of you. and who the fuck are you going to help then? the world is still happening, it's still turning despite the wars and genocides, despite the rising death toll of climate change, despite the threats to democracy. all we can do is put our effort where our mouth is, and take care of ourselves.

[fisherrprince]

Okay so okay so hmmm. The "shadow" of the Dark Knight is meant to be some representation of a part of one's soul, specifically the darker emotions and reflections of oneself, so would Alisaie's be Alphinaud since they're twins? Someone she constantly compares herself to and finds herself Lacking In Relation To Him (In her own mind, he is smarter, he is kinder, he is more rational, he Knows What To Do More Than Her), which would force her to slowly learn that You Are Good Enough As You Are Alie-

grabs you slowly pulls you towards my wip folder looks around. it looks like wol. it looks like the wol the strongest the best the winner until they confront it and it changes shape into just alisaie, just herself she’s competing with. the wol pushes her to be better, she pushes herself to be more. the wol is what she wants in a teacher. herself is what she needs to confront