#animals are stupid humans

[ssmashley]

HIMMMMMMMMM

[keferon]

Two Peas in a Pod: part 2/?

*slips another piece into your mailbox*

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Jazz was still feeling a little woozy from his donation in the dark hours of the morning. Blaster had breakfast changed from the usual to something that felt more like a treat, probably a reward for his good behaviour, and to help his body recover. Fish heavy in proteins, fat, all that healthy stuff. Something that normally he would have tried to savour, but he wolfed it down from excitement. Too many questions ran through his head, and most he couldn't bring himself to voice.

The mer, the mer would pull through. Blaster told him about how he had saved their life with his blood. Praised him high and low. Because Blaster knew how Jazz felt about seeing blood, about how hard blood tests were for him, and that was only a tiny vial. Not three big bags of it. Jazz hadn't seen how much they had taken – because he had kept his eye closed until they left in a hurry –, and hearing about it made him dizzy for other reasons, but he honestly felt real proud of himself.

It was a new feeling, different from other moments of pride – like when he figured out the lock codes. Yeah, this gave him butterflies and the drive to help more.

Blaster laughed when Jazz offered that the vets could take more if the other mer needed it. His handler didn't think it would be, but he would pass it on to the vet team.

Jazz's morning checks were a little off, expected with having a little less fluids and feeling off-balance, but it was kept short and quick. Blaster told him that if he learned anything more, he'd tell him next time he came by and then hurried back down to the staff area. Blaster was needed elsewhere, understandably as there weren't many mer experts here, though he did leave Jazz his waterproof stereo if he wanted to play some of his favourites.

But, the orca mer was far too busy causing a whirlpool from the laps he was swimming. He was too excited to sit still, and embarrassment be damned he started practising old vocals. He didn't remember much of his mother tongue, and he was pretty sure that his pronunciation was off, that or had one hell of an accent. Echo-speech was even more rusty. And once he had gone over and over what he could recall, Jazz began to really worry. A few sentences and handful or so of words was all he had? Gods, I hope I can at least make a decent first impression. Blaster said they were just like me, so hopefully, that will give me some starting points.

More than he cared to count, Jazz would swim into the shallow waters of the medical bay and hope to see something through that window. But no one ever came close enough for him to hear any news of the mer. He couldn't even see anything on his radar, wherever they had done treatment, it wasn't in the hospital ward. It almost felt like he was being purposely kept in the dark.

And just when Jazz was starting to worry that things had taken a bad turn, a group of staff turned up around four pm. He wasn't able to ask any questions, or rather they refused to answer. Shooing him away as they got to work. Starting with closing the gate to the bay to 'keep him out'. Jazz could easily climb those walls, but that wasn't the point. Even if the gate window was closed, he could pick up that they were setting up the water hammock. But it wasn't until he heard the cautionary beeping of the hoist lift approaching that it dawned on him – the mer was coming. Now.

"Jazz," Blaster called, "… Jazz," he blew the training whistle and finally got his mer's attention. "Stop pacing and get over here."

"But–" Jazz looked back longingly up the wall.

"Jazz," his tone dropped to a firm one, and Jazz begrudgingly swam over to the pier. The human crouched and made sure that they held eye contact before he spoke. "I need you to promise me that you will stay in your enclosure."

He sunk a little, trying to play into his cuteness, but being far too anxious to really pull it off. "What do you mean?"

"Jazz," now warning him. Blaster knew full well that he was more than capable of getting into or out of places he shouldn't, bloody Houdini mermaid, "this is serious. Things are going well, we want to keep it that way. Which means keeping things calm and feeling safe. You're excited, I get it, we all are. But in about an hour, they'll be waking up and – from past experience seen with wild Mers – they will likely freak out. And the last thing we need is you hauling your tail over that wall and making things worse. Understand?"

The beeping was louder how and the hiss of hydraulics caused Jazz to look up. The arm of the lift was visible over the wall. They're here!

"Jazz," Blaster hopelessly called for his attention once more.

Within moments, a massive bundle was carefully raised, the staff calling out and coordinating. Jazz's gaze was fixed on the black and white fluke poking out, it was the only part of them he could see, and his heart began to race. Once they became hidden by the wall again, Jazz moved back to pacing by the gate without even thinking. Listening to people hopping into the water to unstrap the mer and call back n' forth. "Careful, careful! – Watch the head! – Someone give me a hand over here! – We're clear on this side! – Keep the head up!"

Really starting to sound like a broken record, Blaster chirped the whistle and called out to him again. The expression he wore must have been pretty pitiful because the look on Blaster's face dropped. "If I open the view port… will you promise me that you will wait, that you will stay in your enclosure?"

"I promise," he answered hastily, placing his hands on the gate, over the panel that would slide open.

"And that you will wait until everything is in the clear, till the staff come to oversee the integration. There will be no rushing things and no asking staff when we will open the gate."

"I promise," he repeated, trying not to beg.

Satisfied, Blaster pulled out his radio, "Blaster to Control; when the team is out of the Mer enclosure's medical bay, open the view port. Jazz's stress is mounting without a visual."

"Can do," came a quick reply.

Though, opening the panel was not. Several minutes went by, the hoist had cleared out, and much of the staff had returned to their other duties. Only two remained double-checking the mer's breathing and pulse. The moment that the last of them left, Jazz heard the lock disengage, and he retracted his hands as the panel shifted and began to slide open. The window was too small to get more than his hand – maybe up to his elbow if he wanted to push it – through, and sat just at water level– any movement sending water hopping to either side. But it gave him a clear view of the surface area inside.

Oh.

Oh. Jazz stopped breathing. While the mer's body was mostly supported by the fabric of the hammock, cradling them on their side, effectively hiding most of them from Jazz's angle. Propped up on a soft floating platform was the mer's head, face towards the gate. Sharp features and elegantly shaped finials, with flattering lines of their markings complimenting the peaceful expression as they slept. The butterflies from earlier came back stronger than ever, his heart thundering as words fumbled from Jazz's lips, "he's beautiful…"

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-GLC

Orca Prowl really is just-- too fucking pretty, omg, I'm living through Jazz in this moment like when I first saw your designs of him.

I'm more than happy to continue writing for you, you bring me so much joy. I screamed when I saw how much you liked it. If you have any requests you would like me to add to the story, leave it in the tags or comments ♡ I now plan to continue until the tsunami and a bit afterwards, maybe more, we'll see~

Upd: There is a next part!

Previous

Oh. MY GOD. OKAY ALRIGHT OKAY ALRIGHT OKA

I'M ABOUT TO START PACING IN CIRCLES JUST LIKE JAZZ OVER HERE KDLCNFJFLFB PL E A S E THIS IS SO GOOD. The tension?? You can fucking TASTE it IT'S SO GREAT GLC I LOVE YOU

The way it all starts at night and then you (as a reader) have all this additional time to boil in your anticipation?? So fucking great. Like you can really feel how little power Jazz has over the wholse situation. The plot is moving but he doesn't have any saying in it. Well. Yet heheh

Anyway haha. Im normal and I made some art>:D

[gh0ulpunk]

"tiktok refugees" what if i slammed your face into the ground for using the word refugee like this

[itslilacokay]

nahhh bro 💀💀💀💀

[tanadrin]

fish-out-of-water character in science fiction to whom humanity is deeply alien, but who does not continually get themselves into awkward social situations because they looked up Human Ettiquette For Dummies, they learned about basic human social dynamics including how humans bond socially, and it is immediately obvious to them after five second of introspection how a highly social tool-using species like humans would benefit from spending a lot of time building social ties

[floofballsammy]

When he goes like

:>

>:>

[drawing-kitty-ckristal]

Oh god ever since i read nyoomerr's ficlet about OctoBinghe it's been stuck in my mind and i just had to draw it!

Nyoomerr's post

[systarkitty]

despicable me

[rocketbirdie]

here comes trouble (make it double!)

[frozen-seagrass]

The WALL-E au no one asked for

[gelu-the-babosa-multiversal]

At this point, I still question how bad Energon is for human health... like, there is a clear inconsistency for every new TF interaction but even in the aligned continuity the idea is bounced like a ball to all directions...

In TF Unicron Trilogy: Energon, Kick was sent countless times in search of Energon by his stupid father only because the kid had the special power to detect Energon... and then use the Energon to give Kick a power armor or something like that IDK.

In TFA it is shown how the mere presence of the All Spark can kill human cells and literally rot a human... but also reverse the process????

On TFP it is said that Energon is lethal, and it was shown with Raf after Megatron shut him with his Dark Energon canon. But then they have to sue pure Energon to save Raf and there are not other consequences after that...

In TFRB Blurr and Slavage gave a caveman a small Energon Crystal so he survived the current disaster that was destroying his home. IT. LITERALLY. KEEP. A. HUMAN. ALIVE! I keep the guy like a frozen fruit in the fridge kjahkajfhLSF

In TFES... IDK I don't remember well, but Mandroid was decaying in life. We could see his whole body rotting as the season passed. With Robby happened the same but at a much faster alarming rate...

And then there's the thing with the Botbots. I'm surprised no one has sued the store because the exposure to their products is causing limb loss, skin rotting, blood loss, sickness, and IDK what else jhdakjefhakf

I think that I might be forgetting more specific scenes and extra info, so feel free to discuss.

[keferon]

May I ask what were the best transformers media you ever saw/read?

Well Transformers Prime, Transformers 1986 and IDW comics are having the first place that’s for sure

And then the second place is kind of shared by Fall of Cybertron, Exodus, Prime wars trilogy, Robots in disguise(2001) and Transformers One.

The third place goes to G1, Animated, Earthspark, Armada, War for Cybertron Netflix series, Aligned Robots in disguise, Bumblebee, Rise of the Beasts and Cyberverse because I only liked some little parts of them.

And then I also saw some of the Bay movies, Victory and Headmasters and didn’t like them at all.

Separate first place for J-Decker. It is not exactly Transformers but it is a show about giant robots and I loved it

[meangreennunseen]

Imagine if Leman and Lion have a bad habit of just... picking their kids up the scruff of their shirts. Sanguinius probably has this too, but I raise you him having his child, just in his feathers and all you see is a little head poking out.

Animalistic primarchs my beloved, they freak out their wives so goddamn much-

I actually do have similiar headcanons, just because Primarchs aren't entirely human, just made to have human bodies, that most of their psyche takes animalistic features from the animal gene Emps gave them. Or they will figure some weird, not fully sensical way to humans, how to do things.

I see Leman Russ as someone who would run on all fours in order to gain speed, so that man would carry his kids by biting at scruffs of their shirt, while he is running from point A) to point B) on all fours. Funny wolf man he is after all.

Lion also stands up to his name. That man, however serious he is still would act battles with his child, where they are allowed to win against him, just to build confidence and train combat abilities. I headcanon that Primarchs who grew up with fight or flight response on dangerous worlds, will unconciously train their childrens' survival and combat insticts since young age.

Magnus, while not than animalistic, will carry his kid in his hair. Those manes are sturdy and kid would feel comfy and protected enough while holding for their dear life while dad is running errands (and often forgetting he has child on his head)

Corvus, while not that animalistic, tho I headcanon he is acting like Corvid very often, would carry his kid on his shoulder. I headcanon Nix was born prematurely, thus pretty small, so Corvus' shoulder was quite comfortable respite for her. Did she slip off? Multiple times, tho Corvus' reflexes always let him catch her.

I just love ideas of Primarchs figuring some weird way to go around Parenthood. Makes my day.

[alex21705]

When new b.s comes up involving Trump

[dorkfruit]

cant sleep so here's ianthe as animal pictures that make me giggle

referenced images below

[sarayashikidays]

so many folks were tagging my Kurama and Kuwabara art as shipping, I decided to actually draw Kurama doing moon-eyes at Kuwabara... After being forced along to a Megallica concert because nobody else was free-!!