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kpforpresident · 3 months ago

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Chapter 7 | Part 2

Thanks for sticking with me, kids. A snippet for your patience x

Lexa, refusing to be cowed within her own private chambers, continues on her path away from the door. Only years of training and instinct keep her steady in her slow methodical movements to pull the three throwing blades from where they buried into the head and neck of the dummy. Shards of wood flutter slowly past Lexa’s hand as she works the honed blades from the soft wood, landing across the dull black leather of her well worn training boots. Lexa can practically feel Clarke burning a hole in the side of her head, arms crossed angrily in front of her body as she taps her food impatiently on the worn wooden floors. She hasn’t moved more than a foot into the room, clearly unsure about being in this space despite her angry entrance.

Polis feels a million miles away in this small space, a buttery stream of sunlight pouring through an upper window to fan out in a dreamy pattern on the far wall. The entire structure of the converted stable is wood, the mere memory of two horse stalls standing against the far right side, now filled with practice dummies, spare training weapons, and a jug of water that a young Natblida is tasked to refresh daily. A small tin bowl sits on the rickety table beside the stall entrance, a few apples and a small linen bag of jerky tucked carefully inside. This had been Anya’s addition to the space when Costia had died and Lexa hadn’t left the stables for a week, the silent plea the closest Lexa had ever seen Anya come to a concession.

The silence seems to grow teeth as the two women look at each other- one with barely muted scorn, the other with trained neutrality. Far away, the river’s melodic trickle is the only reprieve from this moment that seems to drag out into infinity.

Lexa flips her dagger slowly as she crosses from the spot by the training dummy to perch onto an stable door, leaning into the wood that had been worn smooth with centuries of use. This had been Heda’s private stable for many lives before Lexa’s, the war drums a constant and unending companion to many previous Commander’s reigns. Lexa was the first to lead a life that didn’t fall asleep and rise in the morning with a constant refrain of war just beyond her doorstep.

This was a life that was mean to be dotted with peace, and propserity for her people. Lexa had fought and bled and strategized and lost to make it so.

Lexa remembers with a pang how little Madi who worked in the kitchens had run in the week previously, breathless with joy over the return of the robins to the nearby meadow, where young children took their outdoor lessons. Lexa, who had yet to be broken of her habit of sneaking into the kitchen to sneak a few pieces of cheese and the end of the daily loaf of bread- much to Anya’s continued chagrin– had nearly swallowed her tongue in surprise when the door flew open to reveal the breathless, beaming youth.

The birds had avoided Polis for Lexa’s lifetime thus far and her parent’s before her. Not that she blamed them- the clatter of the hammers in the smiths as they foraged swords from glowing hearths and the pounding of horse’s hoof beats had been the constant in the sunrise years of Lexa’s young life.

Now, birdsong would sometimes float through the morning markets, the entire city seeming to hold its collective breath as the quavering notes filled the honey-sweet summer air.

Madi’s little brother–Roni– had died in the attack by Nia. A pang hits Lexa deeper in the heart as she remembers the little boy’s tawny eyes and deep dimple in his cheek that would appear when Lexa snuck the little boy the scraps of her morning meal, studiously avoiding Lyra’s eyes as she tutted silently from the far end of the dining room.

Lexa refuses to turn her back to Clarke as she storms farther into Heda’s sanctum. This is her space. She will not be cowed by some sacred blonde girl, sent down from the skies as if destined for her personally.

Flip. Flip. Flip.

“I must speak with Aden regarding his inability to keep Heda’s location confidential.” Lexa hears herself saying as she runs a finger down the tightly wrapped leather handle of her weapon, feeling the worn material give slightly as she rubs the pad of her thumb into the spot just below the throat of the blade.

Lexa practically watches Clarke catch fire in front of her as the blonde swells with the force of her anger, blue eyes sparking with barely withhead fury as she bears down onto the Commander with all the wrath of a summer storm.

“It’s been days, Lexa! I had to practically emotionally black mail a twelve year old to tell me where you were! Because you, a fucking LEADER OF A COUNTRY decided that instead of comforting your people in a time of uncertainty and strife, you were going to hide in your quasi-man cave, SULKING!I”

Lexa blinks under the assault of Clarke’s spat accusations, Clarke’s pulse thrumming at the speed of light as the light shines passionately in her gaze. A moment passes as Lexa continues to turn her knife over and over in her hand, clearly finding some small comfort in the repetitive movement.

“A man- cave…?”

“Not the point, Heda,” Clarke practically snarls.

For the first time in Lexa’s short reign as a leader, she dislikes the sound of her title. Coming from Clarke, it sounds like a curse.

Clarke’s so close now she can almost count the freckles that spray across Lexa’s nose like sand stuck to a wet canvas. Even gaunt and clearly sleep-deprived, whether from an unknown outside threat or her own doing, the Commander was beautiful. Grey-green eyes held steadfast to Clarke’s own, the deep calm within them unruffled despite the rapidly tightening corners of Lexa’s mouth, muscles growing taught as Clarke bears down on her.

Clarke is suddenly reminded of a fox she had come across in the forest, trapped into a corner by a slightly larger, heavily mutated bobcat. The fox had grown stiller and quieter until it had exploded with fury at its attacker, snarling as blood sprayed from the ferocity of its attack. Still growling a challenge, the creature had bounded into the dense of the trees, scarlet tail flashing in the dying light of day.

The way Lexa holds herself as Clarke closes in reminds her of the fox- and yet, she can’t find it within herself to stem the tide of her tirade as she moves even closer to the grounder.

“I even came by your room, there was never candles lit inside and regardless of the hour, the guard would lie for you and say that you weren’t there–”

Lexa can’t stop the way her eyes linger on Clarke’s cupid bow as she talks, despite the absolute vitriol that coats her tone as she spits words at Lexa like arrows loosed from a bow.

Has she always had that freckle?

All of a sudden Lexa’s skin feels too tight, sweat still dripping down the small of her back. The handle in her hand is the only thing anchoring her to this moment and her tenuous threads of sanity, keeping her from falling into orbit with that dammed freckle–

She wavers.

“It’s because I wasn’t there, Clarke.”

The trudge back to Polis in the weak light of a dying day is not a pleasant one. Clarke, seemingly able to keep herself quiet only through some herculean force of will, glares daggers at Lexa throughout the entire, muddy walk through the rolling hills outside of Polis. And through the streets of the city, dodging sellers and shoppers alike as she silently follows a hooded, semi-disguised Lexa back towards the heart of the city, the tower.

Moments prior, a silent brow had arched as Lexa sheathed her throwing daggers quickly and draped a light black shawl around her shoulders, carefully tucking her hair beneath and arranging it so most of her features were thrown into sharp shadow.

Catching Clarke’s questioning gaze in the cracked mirror piece that had been hung at the door, Lexa shrugged as she tucked an errant curl behind her ear.

“Keeps me from being spotted as Heda. Helps me move unnoticed through the city.”

She leaves through the door within another word, leaving Clarke to ponder what occasions the leader of an adoring public would want to move through the city without the mantle of Heda.

Now, back at the tower, Lexa lets the shawl fall back, the guards moving in a practice wave to let her in as she strides towards the rickety elevator. She quirks an eyebrow as Clarke hesitates.

Gathering the remnants of her patience and courage, she follows Lexa into the hated rusty box and into the heart of the tower.

///

#clexa #can you feel my heart #clarke #lexa #chapter 7 part 2 #outlines for the other 2 chapters and the rest of this one exist i promise #come bug me to write #clearly my motivation needs to be external

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butmakeitgayblog · 9 months ago

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in your canon au, say Lexa lets loose and gets drunk and extra cuddly. And she’s more vocal to Clarke about how attractive she is and how much she loves her. How does Clarke react to that seeing her be so free and be young for the first time?

Ya know... I actually think a drunk Lexa would be very mushy.

Cuddly, yes. Handsy and smoochy, yes.

I think if she ever allowed herself to be tipsy in public she'd never be anything but proper, if not a little more subdued. Sat a little lazier in her throne. Relaxed back and legs spread with that cocky air of swagger she gets about her. Probably a half grin constantly twitching juuuust at the edges of her lips. Nothing beyond that. Still entirely dignified and in command of her faculties.

But alone?

I think if Lexa allowed herself to overindulge alone in her room with Clarke, I think the more romantic and dreamy side of Lexa would come out mingled in among her normal poise of Heda. A coin constantly flipping from moment to moment. A demure and elegant smile here, a wine sodden giggle there - all bunny toothed and deliciously silly. All hazy bedroom eyes and low hung lashes dotted with warm, mushy kisses to the hinge of Clarke's jaw. Those big juicy lips stained red from berry wine constantly half pursed in drunken thought. Asking Clarke for thoughts on the clans and what she thinks of Earth, what's her favorite old world poet and ever more stories about life among the stars.

Just because, "Even when you're angry with me, I enjoy listening to you speak."

Which is... not exactly the most romantic thing a person can say, but coming from Lexa, there's always a deeper truth buried in her words. Lexa is always saying something, even when she's not saying much at all.

And it's in that understanding that moments when Lexa would do something as careless as let herself have a few drinks too many, and become more open and vocal, that would make everything she says and does hit even harder. All the thoughtless kisses and the not-so-mindless trailing of her fingers along Clarke's palm. The murmurings of how beautiful Clarke is, how sexy she is when she's... well, doing anything. Leading her people, brokering peace, eating, yawning, sleeping. When she pulls Clarke close under the furs of her bed and whispers in a kiss against Clarke's ear that she had thought she'd never get to feel this again. That after losing Costia, she'd forced herself to accept that she'd always sleep alone. That she'd forced herself to prefer it.

But she doesn't miss sleeping alone...

Because Clarke is pretty, and funny in all the ways Lexa doesn't believe that she is, and that she feels more like herself with Clarke pressed against her ribs.

And I just think Clarke would feel... strong. I think she'd feel strong in those moments. Because so much of her life is obligation and weighed down by her people and her responsibility, but this is different. Being responsible for - being trusted to protect and care for - a drunkly handsy and romantically attentive Lexa isn't complicated. Not when she's honest with herself. It's not another obligation. It's getting to be with Lexa when she's vulnerable, when she's just being Lexa. It's getting to hear how that complex brain of hers works, and all those inner thoughts being as close to unfiltered as Lexa ever gets. I mean what can she do when those big doe eyes are blinking at her from half a pillow away as Lexa whispers that she didn't know love could feel like this?

What can she do other than fall for her harder?

#anon #in secret au #imagine a tipsy Lexa telling Clarke that she'd hoped Clarke would take a nap with her in her tent that evening before the mountain #gay loser #every time Clarke suggests a nice nap together after that night Lexa would 100% just 😐😒

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writing-in-lesbian · 1 year ago

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A Heiress in Love Pt. 7

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff / Female Reader

Tags: angst, fluff,

Translations: Hainofi = princess // Strik sis [Strisis] = little sister // Ai hod yu in = I love you // Ste yuj = Stay strong //

Chapter synopsis: War is coming and some things need to be sped up for the alliances to work. Right in the middle of everything, someone will warn or new appointed commander about her betrothed.

A/N: This story keeps sending me into new research topics! I hope I’m doing them justice. Also since there aren’t a lot of trigedeslang transistors, everything in italics and underlined would be trigedeslang. Again, I’m partying ways from some canon events in the 100 in order for this to work. Work is not beta’d so all mistakes are mine.

Chapter 7 - A Heda on the Rise

The darkness seems to be more welcoming this time yet, the red fog that you saw before remains there, like a guardian.

Fainted noises try to make their way into your mind, but the dizziness you feel is more than enough to shut anything that tries to reach you. Your hand feels warm and is the kind that makes you feel sleepy and cozy. Feeling a squeeze into your hand, the darkness starts to dissipate slowly.

You get back into reality when you hear far away your name being called, turning to the right, where you think the voice is coming. Opening your eyes, you see your mom looking at you with worried eyes. Her lips mouth something to you but your brain is a little bit foggy.

“Are you okay?” Her echoed words reach your ears. “You seem a little uneasy”

“I’m fine” yet her mother instincts kick in and she gets next to you. Wanda just observing through her peripheral vision, not letting your hand go. Clarke is observing your face, she touches your forehead but feels only your cold skin.

The voices around you are a mix of angriness and confusion, Octavia and Natasha are having their staring contest.

“Octavia, there’s no need to duel Duchess Natasha” You hear your mother talk but your mind is trying to catch up, everything seems a little out of sync. Perhaps the lack of sleep, food, and water is taking finally a toll on you.

“Heda” whatever simple hand gesture Lexa does is enough to keep Octavia in silence.

“Mother, a flame keeper has been in grounders line for all time” you hear Madi say but can’t seem to fully understand it.

“Commander if I may,” Tony says, and to your surprise your mother acknowledges him with a simple nod.

“I know all I’m allowed to know about Flame keepers and I think with our nanotechnology we can improve the efficiency and security of it. That’s why, Duchess Romanoff would be dear Y/N guardian and you my dear…sorry don’t know your name”

He pauses, you guess, waiting for Octavia’s response, which never came.

“Well, you my angry brunette will be as well,” he says and you can guess the gasp you hear is Madi’s. You feel a squeeze in your hand and Wanda’s tense right next to you.

“It will be fine, you don’t have to be afraid,” you think as loud and clear as you can to calm Wanda, it worked before so, she should be able to hear you right away. The tension in your hand lessened and let you know it did.

“I’m not following,” Pietro says out of nowhere, you didn’t even pay attention when he arrived.

Your mother guides King Tony and your mom to the center of the table, pausing a little at seeing your ceremonial things still in place. She searches your gaze but you avoid it before meeting her eyes. You see her guards follow her and stand a few paces behind her.

“Mother if I may, I thought only the commander was worthy of carrying the flame, no offense to our guests here”

Madi approaches your mother, asking silently to clear everything, but is stopped by your mom. Clarke grabs her hand, making her stay there, out of your reach.

“Y/N, Wanda” Lexa’s voice is neutral but you detect a hint of warmth in her tone, her raised hand indicates for both of you to approach her.

You feel Wanda’s tug and in that moment you realize how stiff you were, if the crack of your knee indicates it. You walk slowly, never letting Wanda’s hand go, an action that is noticed by everyone. Clarke has a small smile adorning her face, while Natasha smirks. Octavia’s face goes neutral, even thou you know deep down she’s content with how things are seeming to go with Lady Maximoff and Pietro gives you his usual thumbs up. You search for Madi’s eyes, looking for the comfort a big sister could provide but you see only confusion.

“As we unite our people through my daughter and Lady Maximoff, we should never forget our origins and focus more on our similitudes rather than our differences” Lexa speaks softly but firmly, a tone you have heard many times when she was tucking you into bed explaining to her best effort, the hundred questions you bombarded her with at night.

That is enough to make you form a hard-to-see but small smile.

“We need to understand us and help us. The flame, Madi, is one of the things that make us grounders unique but is, as we know, dangerous for the receiver. To protect us, King Tony will improve the flame that Y/N will be getting, allowing me to continue to keep it as well until I transcend and pass it fully to her”

“If I may,” Tony asks “When Ultron got out of our alliance and started doing all crazy things, it reminded me that, what we all here seek, is the chance to live in peace, and when that is threatened and our loved ones are in danger, we protect them”

“Attack them and you attack me” you hear yourself saying.

“Precisely!” An over-excited Tony says, “It took me two hits close home to understand that I, couldn’t do it alone” he says while walking towards you.

Before he can reach you, Wanda takes a tiny step in front of you that causes Tony to stop before getting too close to you. His face is intrigued but doesn’t change his excitement. However, he changes slightly his course of action and goes to the table instead.

“I have been fascinated with grounders' culture since I met your mothers' ages ago Princess Y/N, so when the time called for it, I reached out to them and well, here we are”

That’s the most simplest way of explaining years of traditions in less than 10 seconds but he says this while getting something from under his coat. It’s a small red box with lines in yellow. He then proceeds to uncover his arm and punches some letters or that’s what you think he’s doing, in what looks like a bracelet, that is more than that as a hologram appears in thin air.

“That still doesn’t explain why Duchess Romanoff has to be the flame keeper,” Madi says, still not trusting any of this.

“I didn’t ask for it either nor do I understand it all but I trust Stark on it” Duchess Romanoff’s voice is so near you that you have to take all control to not shiver, instead squeezing Wanda’s hand, noticing the small smirk she has. For your own sake, you decide not to question it further. “Plus, I care for Wanda and if she becomes part of the grounder's culture, I want to understand it as well”

“Madi, daughter. Patience in one thing”

“Patience in all things” you hear your sister finish the sentence with a sour mode. A sentence that Lexa tried so hard to teach you when you were little and got impatient. You also remember the many lessons you had with her on the proper way of breathing and how to use it to control your anxiety or fears.

“We know the importance of the flame keeper, that’s why part of the agreement included sharing the information about it with them as well we allowed for someone to be part of it. A decision Clarke agreed on it”

At one point you suspected your mom was a big part of the decision on your marriage, the fact that she agreed on the Flame makes you wonder if it had anything to do with their past. You knew your mom carried it for a brief time and how it affected her. Perhaps all of this comes in the best interest.

“Out of all the pool presented, your mom and I decided Duchess Romanoff was the best candidate,” So your mothers chose who was going to bear it? “Not only is she an expert in hand-to-hand combat, but also has a high set of skills that will help keep Y/N and Lady Wanda safe if the case arises”.

Your mom lets Madi's hand and stands next to Lexa and, you figure this has a deeper commitment than you thought of.

“Along with Octavia” Clarke says “She more than anyone would know the importance of protecting their Heda” Just knowing that Octavia will take the role as well, gives you some type of comfort you didn’t know you needed.

Your mother explains while motioning for Octavia and Natasha to come. King Tony proceeds then to touch the hologram and you see the chip projected there and the image is more vivid and clear of what you have seen on your mother’s books and Becca’s library. There are a lot of small letters and numbers scribbled all over it, your best guess it’s that it contains the improvements your mother told you about. Still, how does it work, would it hurt now? You know before, the Flame would allow you to keep your thoughts separated, and now? What is all of this doesn’t work and the Flame chooses another person? Many questions are rounding your mind and it’s getting harder to keep track of all of them. Wanda’s thumb starts doing small circles in your hand, making you get out of your mind.

“I might not be able to read your mind but boy your thoughts are loud” and hearing her whisper so close to you, makes your skin and body tremble. A small chuckle leaves your mouth, getting just the attention of Madi, who looks at you with a curious expression.

“The adaptations I made, would allow Queen Lexa and Princes Y/N to be able to carry the flame, without having any dangers to their health, minimal pain for our princess here, and preserving all the qualities the first commander did”.

Lexa opens the box containing the Flame you’ll be getting soon, the small piece capable of uniting or separating nations, containing power and a lot of responsibilities, making you well aware that, if the old laws were still in place, a lot of people would die to get their hands on. Yet, the infinite symbol inscribed on it faintly glows.

“Y/N… Y/N…the moment has come. Welcome daughter”

“Our nanotechnology has been a resource that many are after, and I’m more than happy to lend it to the aid of our new conjoint kingdoms and the well of their and our heiresses”

“Y/N… Y/N…the moment has come. Welcome Heinoffi”

You barely hear him, being more interested in the data and images showing virtually, the blue hem making it look fascinating to you, so much so that you barely register the small step you take towards it until you’re stopped by Wanda’s hand still in yours. Your mother notes this and takes a look at you, her curiosity getting the best out of her.

“Y/N… Y/N…the moment has come. Welcome Heiress Woods-Griffin”

“Y/N… Y/N…the moment has come. Welcome daughter”

“Y/N… Y/N…the moment has come. Welcome Heinoffi”

King Tony keeps talking but is just white noise compared to what you are hearing. You have heard the stories, the legends, you know that the voices of past commanders, some kind of memory of them will talk with you… but it should be until you get the flame right? So, whose voices are these and why are you hearing them?

Natasha opens then the box, containing a similar but smaller piece of your flame, much to Octavia’s displeasure, noticeable on her face but is replaced soon by curiosity as she sees Wanda taking a step towards Natasha.

“The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here. The moment has come. The heiresses are here.”

You feel a sudden need to reach for the box your mother has, taking Wanda with you, who shows nothing but a willingness to walk, eager to get the box in Natasha’s hand. You hear nothing but the voices until….

CLANK, CLANK.

A metal noise is heard, making you stop in your tracks, your hand close to the box your mother had, which has been closed. Wanda’s hand is on the box Natasha has, with Clarke’s hand on top of it. You didn’t notice your mom moved, less see the other box being opened.

“Curios indeed” you heard King Tony say.

Wait, weren’t those the same words Aiden told you?

“Fascinating, isn’t daughter? My predecessors are eager for you to join us” and you look at your mother, her eyes are unguarded just for you and you see the love and pride in them, but you also see something else, you can’t pinpoint what it is yet.

“Lady Maximoff” she takes her sight towards Wanda and notices how, despite taking different steps, your hands remained linked. The small smile there is just perceptible for you and Madi.

“What is in front of you, is a replica of the Flame Y/N would be getting that you would be having in custody, hence why we decided to have two flame keepers, one, to guard Y/N and the other, to come in place if the occasion arises, you need to evacuate with the flame”

Wanda returns to your side, dropping your hand to play with her ring fingers, a piece of hair falls from her hairstyle, and you observe her while trying to comprehend everything that has been said, your mind racing a mile per second, tying things here and there. So if Tony requested the marriage to protect his lands and people, your mothers agreeing to it AND sharing the flame knowledge, plus including another flame keeper and a replica? What’s the real meaning of all of this?

“Would I always be hearing the voices?” Comes the quiet question of Wanda.

“You heard them?” Pietro, who up until this point was watching the whole thing unfold, approaches his sister. You can’t help but step a little in front of him.

“I…think?” Her eternal frown comes into place and you can’t help but notice that’s different from the one prior, this one is less pronounced, making her eyes smaller, although the tilted head remains the same.

“If you heard them Lady Maximoff, as precedent as this is, I believe it has to do more with your abilities, still, it doesn’t minimize the fact of it, especially for someone who’s not natblida” your mother says, not even a hint of surprise on her voice. Turning, you see your mom looking at Wanda with confidence, a spark of something you haven’t seen reflect it on someone outside your clan for a long time.

The fact that both of them knew about Wanda’s abilities makes you wonder how much they know, you recently learned them, but well, maybe King Tony shared that information. If your mothers agreed to

Madi opts now to turn and walk away, your instinct is going after her but your feet refuse to cooperate. By this time, the first signs of sunrise are showing, and the little place you have been all night starts to appear clearer. You can see more now the features of the ceremonial table and the articles left there, the thin smoke of the incense long gone, but the ashes remaining there, scattered on the table. Your mom has noticed the sun rising as well, whispering something to Lexa, and then proceeds to leave, taking Pietro with her with promises of breakfast and coffee. The last item offered, you think, shouldn’t be something Pietro should get his hands on, an over-caffeinated hyperactive child is the less you need now, yet, the thought brings a smile to your face.

”Now, there’s a journey ahead of us that we should prepare for. We leave in 15 minutes, horses are ready and I believe, King Tony wants to speak to you Y/N” Your mother takes the bowl containing your blood and needles and signals for the rest of the party to leave all, except for Octavia who maintains her position not far from you, but giving you enough privacy.

Wanda is hesitant to let your hand go. And after a few seconds of thinking she turns to leave, Natasha at her side in an instant.

“I’ll be out soon,” you say after her, taking her nodding as a sign that she heard you, saying it to try and reaffirm whatever worries or curiosity she might have or maybe it was to calm your worries. You haven’t met King Tony personally nor this close before, but here you are.

“Curios is a killer thing, don’t you think my darling?” He says while playing with the matches left on the place where the rest of your ceremonial things are.

“Not your darling, please don’t refer to me like that again” There’s an element you don’t like about someone calling you darling, other than really close people.

“Feisty, I see. No wonder why our dear witchy feels attracted to you”

“With all due respect King Tony, what is it that you wanted to talk? We need to leave soon and we have a few hours ahead of traveling. I would like to get ready”

But the fact of his words is making something inside you, clearly is nice to hear a confirmation that Wanda feels attracted but his tone and the way he said it, doesn’t suit you well.

“Yes about that… I just wanted to make sure you’re prepared for what might come?”

King Tony might be a lot of things, but discrete has never been his best strong suit. You need to inquire more about what has been said and agreed on this marriage thing.

“I am” and your voice carries so much strength and pride, just like your mother used to do and still does when her reasons are questioned. You have spent a lot of time studying, training and preparing for your ascension as Heda, the fact that a war might break soon makes you nervous, but you trust your preparation and your heritage.

“And if chaos breaks?”

The sun is almost up, mother nature indicating that your party must leave soon for the agenda to continue and not interrupt another thing. Although your ascension ceremony will be tomorrow night, you’re certain more things are preparing behind the curtains, didn’t Octavia mention something about Raven sending a package for your ceremony? To be honest, if Raven knew about it, then… when or how did she get the news about it? And how did she get them that fast?

A flock of birds past over your head, but your eyes remain on the King, gauging his reaction to your lack of response, trying to read him. He’s quite the character, making it a little bit difficult to find a truthful interpretation.

He takes your silence as something based on the chuckle he makes and proceeds to explain.

“Our dear witchy over there and future Mrs. Woods-Griffin can be something” his bracelet on the hand signaling where Wanda just left shines under the sun, making you realize you need to end this soon.

“You know about Wanda’s magic then” It’s not a question.

“If I know? Girl, I will be afraid if her chaos gets out of control-”

“So your better option was to ship her to a foreign kingdom so it gets out of your hand”

“Princess” and the tone is so petty you almost hate it. “I rather have her as an ally than be on the receiving end of her anger”

“I shouldn’t be entertaining you with these questions, but If chaos, as you and Aiden like to name her magic, decides to come out to play, I’ll be ready”

Your mother never taught you to look down first on a staring match, combine that with the stubbornness you inherited from your mom and you have a killer stare. Which makes King Tony smile like a madman.

“Good! That’s exactly why I choose you over Vision to be her wife, now chop chop Princess we have a journey ahead of us”

He leaves your side faster than you can comprehend what he just said. Of course, you have heard of Count Vision and his last attempt to have Wanda as a wife, the thought never sitting well with you, for all purposes, word has it that Count Vision is just as cold and heartless as a machine, but his assets and technology would have been something to pique the interest of Tony, yet he chose you over him, why? You have so many questions to ask your mother but are afraid she won’t answer them if she feels is not the time. Deciding not to dwell more on the issue you kneel to retrieve the bag where you carried your ceremonial things.

A chirp is heard somewhere in the trees, hurrying your steps, knowing Echo is just a moment away to come and retrieve whatever things you leave, you finally, step out of the ceremonial place and take a few seconds to enjoy the cold breeze.

This exact time, just a few minutes after sunrise, is the time you have come to love the most. The temperature is perfect, not warm yet not too cold, the wind is chill enough to be able to enjoy it without a heavy jacket. Your mother used to find you out of bed at this time many times, standing by your side, always extending her hand without saying a word, and every time you took it. Both enjoyed the silence and the company. She would later carry you back to your chambers, tickling your sides until you asked her to stop between waves of laughter. She did it until you were 6 years old, claiming you were too big for her to continue carrying you and wasn’t proper for a princess.

“Heinofi” Octavia's voice surprises you, having completely forgotten she was just mere steps away. Did she hear your talk with King Tony?

“Don’t you dare question what you have to offer, we all know anyone would be honored to be your wife”

“I’m not-“

“I know you Y/N, whatever King Tony said about Vision, ain’t worthy worrying your mind”

For many people, Octavia is just a distant, uninterested, savage brunette, but you know that’s just a facade, deep down she’s more intelligent and observant than a lot of people think, yet her nickname of Bloodreina holds up to her reputation.

She grabs your chin and lifts it so you can see her in the eyes, and what you see makes you question not for the first time, what have you done to have such a cool aunt care that deeply for you. Madi once joked about you being the daughter she wished she had.

“Thanks Aunt”

“Now, Echo had your horse packed and your mother awaits. I saw Wanda pass with Natasha so we should get going”

She proceeds to lead the way but your hand stops her before she can take more than two steps ahead of you.

“Aunt Tavia”

Octavia turns to look at you questioningly.

“Do you know the reasons my mothers agreed on all of this and if they were aware of Wanda’s abilities?”

You hesitate for a moment, your question taking her out of guard.

“You better than anyone should know that not all the important decisions your mothers take are shared with their counsels. That being said I know they were aware of what Wanda can make, and no Y/N I don’t know it. As for the reasons for the marriage to take place, I guess they balanced both options of suitors and decided on the best one, political and personal”

Wait, both?

“Both?” You ask but her gentle push for you to walk makes you trip, regaining your composure you keep walking but still waiting for her answer.

“I shouldn’t have said that. Forget I said it” She well knows you won’t let it go that easy, but for your benefit, since you had your wish granted, you keep quiet. Making a sign of erasing your mind with your hand, you smile and walk ahead of her.

It doesn’t take you too long to reach the parting point, you see ten to twelve horses at the ready, your mother guards already in place. Counting them and making mental notes of which horse is for whom, you notice five are still waiting for their rider but yours is not there.

“Daughter, are you ready?” Your mother’s voice welcomes you, just as she is mounting her black Percheron, her elegance is something you have always admired. You take it as a good sign that Philly is there, since you know that’s not her battle horse, since it has been a while since Raven implemented some upgrades and experiments on that department, no longer using life animals for it, but rather something mechanic, nor exactly a robot but similar.

“I am mother” Echo approaches you, with your own Lipizzan horse, his grey coat shining under the weather and his mane braided elegantly.

Approaching them you thank Echo and take Dasher’s reins. Your other hand caresses his forehead carefully avoiding his muzzle. You approach your forehead to his.

“Hey there Dash, ready for a journey?” His only response is his short snort. You have had it since you were eight, a present from Queen Regina, arguing if you were to be a good goddaughter, you need it to learn to ride properly. The relationship you had with Dasher has only been growing ever since, with both of you bonding almost immediately.

Those are the things that make you question how many of your relationships were just mere political movements rather than affection. Deciding to leave that thought for another time, you caress Dash one more time before a guard helps you mount him.

Once you are on him, you whisper small affective, and reassuring words into his ear, caressing his beautiful mane. You know Dasher can feel nervous sometimes when new people surround him, so you do your best to stay calm and transmit that to him.

“Lexa” you hear your mom calling her, she’s still on the ground. “Safe travels. I’ll see you soon” She takes Lexa’s hand for a few seconds and leaves with her guards towards the carriages zone, part of King Tony’s party is waiting over there, as far as you can see he’s not among them. You guess she might be doing something else for the wedding preparation with your guests.

“My dear Lexa, what beautiful creatures you have here” Well, that responded to your question about why he was not over there.

You’re guessing that if he was the one working on the new flame, he would be the one indicating how to handle it.

“We’re proud of our horses. Intelligent and magnificent creatures they are”

King Tony walks closer to the other horses, you supposed he would wait for someone to helpl him but to your surprise, he mounts it quite quickly.

“I’m a bit rusty, it’s been a while since I did it”

“You used to ride?” Your question is more of curiosity than anything else.

“Growing up, yes”

“Impressive horse Commander, and more impressive he hasn’t dropped Stark”

You turn to see Duchess Romanoff and Wanda slowly approaching, you haven’t thought why they weren’t there nor near the carriages when you joined.

“Very funny, let’s see how yours handles your presence” Is he indulging in the comment?

Without more thinking you descend Dasher and walk towards Wanda, offering a small smile which she reciprocates albeit reluctantly, which makes you frown a little.

“Those are beautiful horses Princess Woods-Griffin” so you’re back to formalities.

“Not as beautiful as you” You can hear and feel Octavia and your mother cringing from where they stand, already in her horses, but the small blush on Wanda’s cheeks makes it worthy.

“Echo and Finley will help you mountain yours, we need to be leaving soon” and the commanding voice your mother has is enough for King Tony to regain his composure.

“I have never ridden a horse before” It’s Wanda’s timid voice and now you understand her behavior and posture.

She’s afraid.

Her hands are playing with her rings, trying hard not to bite her nails, and her sight is fixed on Dasher, you can’t help but feel pride. He’s mesmerizing and gorgeous to look at.

“Then you must ride with me” and not soon after your words leave your mouth you know a reprimand will come your way.

For safety reasons, in every political travel, there must be only one rider per horse, in case there’s an ambush, your guards can help you escape in different routes and not compromise any of you. You know that this journey is way more than just a political thing.

“Daughter, I’m afraid that would have to be for another occasion” There’s not a drop of hardness or angriness in your mother tone, but a small warning.

And for the first time in forever, you do something you never thought you’d do.

You guide her to Dasher.

The horse sensing what are you going to ask, just moves with his head, signifying he’ll allow Wanda to ride him.

“Dasher would be yours for the journey then” Lexa, Octavia, and even Echo are well aware of what that means.

Dasher is to be ridden only by you, the horse not allowing anyone else to mount him, not even her first owner Queen Regina has been able to do it. Dasher never allows the saddle to be put on him if it’s not going to be for you, you guess that he can sense it and has a better instinct than most humans.

Not even Princess Danvers, your previous girlfriend did it. Dasher liked her but never allowed it to be ridden by her. When you two went out riding, you had to take Quinn, your other Lipizzan horse for it, she allowed other people with you.

Once, Queen Emma said that the connection you had with your horses was similar and way freaky than the one Regina had with Rosinante, her horse. You answered that she didn’t understand the connection between horses and humans since her horse wasn’t too happy with her. Queen Regina snorted, making you feel good. Until this time, is hard for you to call them godmothers.

“Is it yours? He’s magnificent” Wanda says and you can swear Dash neighs in response to that. Cheeky little bastard but you feel happy he’s allowing Wanda so far.

“Yes, his name is Dasher, he’s my main one”

Like reading your mind Dasher nudges his muzzle on Wanda’s shoulder and you encourage her to pet him.

Your mother observes this and smiles, happy to see you content despite the threat of war over your heads.

“Here, let me”

In an instant, Finley, the stable young man is at Dasher's side, putting his two hands together, so Wanda can step into them, this action needs it to push the rider up. You take Wanda’s waist and she jumps a little, surprised by the action.

“I’ll help you get onto him. Dasher is a gentleman but if you have never ridden, it can be tricky to get onto him”

Wanda looks at you, her ever-inquisitive look in place. She puts her hands on your shoulders, nodding her head, indicating she’s ready. You laugh and turn her, her back now towards you.

“Put your right foot on Finley’s hands and impulse your weight. Once you feel the push, your left leg should do a small arch over Dasher’s back. Ready? On three. One. Two. Three”

Wanda graciously mounts Dasher, giving you a memory to cherish for ages. Once she’s on Dasher you can see her nervousness be replaced with excitement, her smile getting bigger by the second.

Echo, who had taken over Dasher’s reins, gives them to you with a small nod.

“Here, this will help you guide him and to hold on to him. You won’t need to do much, since Quinn and I will go right next to you and Dash is excellent following us”

You had been involved a lot in their training, making sure both knew how to follow each other without a rider or an injured one. Sometimes your paranoia pays off.

“Okay” and is the smile and the brightness in her eyes that does it for you.

You go to Quinn, feeling Wanda’s eyes on your back, observing your interaction with Quinn, you salute her the same way you did it with Dasher. You mount her without help, years with them have made you agile. Echo passes your bags and sword. Thanking her you take a moment to whisper something into Quinn's ears, getting a snort in response.

“It seems we’re all ready. Indra” your mother motions for her most loyal warrior and leader. Indra gives this vibe of hating everyone but is nothing compared to Anya.

“Send a messenger to the clans. Let them know my daughter's Ascension ceremony will take place tomorrow. They should know we’re ready and we must stay united in our coalition”

Indra nods and takes off on her horse, you thought she would be going with you, but then again, a lot of things have been changing by the second. The guards open the gigantic gates, and you see the roads that lead to Polis, the royal guards leading the way, followed by your mother, King Tony, Duchess Romanoff, then you and Wanda, Octavia, and the rest of the royal guards behind

You hear some guards whisper safe travels. You’re somehow excited for what lies ahead. After all, you have traveled this road many times, knowing the safety of its course. Turning you see Wanda calmingly admiring the landscape, one hand in Dasher’s rein, the other, caressing him slowly. She’s a natural.

The sun is now fully up, giving the forest a whimsical view, everything seems calm, so you relax and let yourself enjoy the ride, a few moments of peace before the madness begins.

Tag List: @spongebobtentacles @wandamaximoff727 @cristin-rjd @aawake-atnight @msromanoffswife @juno-verse @wandastan-2 @wannabe-fic-reader @cd-4848

#ao3 author #cross posted on ao3 #wanda maximoff x female reader #wanda maximoff x y/n #a heiress in love #wanda maximoff x reader #fanfic writing

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ao3feed-clexafic · 1 month ago

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Remember Me

Read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/63206869 by Val_Creative Instead of Lexa getting shot, Clarke takes the bullet. Non-fatally. Words: 280, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 18 of Close Enough, Welcome Back Femslash February! 2025 Fandoms: The 100 (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Categories: F/F Characters: Lexa (The 100), Clarke Griffin, Titus (The 100), John Murphy (The 100) Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa Additional Tags: Season/Series 03, Episode Fix-It: s03e07 Thirteen (The 100), Lexa Lives (The 100), Everybody Lives, Fluff and Angst, Whump, Sad with a Happy Ending, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Blood, Gun Violence, Major Character Injury, Suicide Attempt, Polis (The 100), Heda Lexa (The 100), Protective Lexa (The 100), Soft Lexa (The 100), Angry Lexa (The 100), Lexa Loves Clarke Griffin, Clarke Griffin Loves Bellamy Blake, Protective Clarke Griffin, Injured Clarke Griffin, Soft Clarke Griffin, Vignette, Femslash, Femslash February, Femslash February 2025 Read it on AO3 at https://archiveofourown.org/works/63206869

#ifttt #clexa #clexa fanfic #Don't @ me if you're unhappy with tags

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lexa-griffins · 3 months ago

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What animals do farm clexa get for their farm in order?

The first animal they get are a couple of chickens. They are easy enough to maintain and fresh eggs are always welcomed.

After that, it is only when the house is more or less ready that they get a little cow that Lexa adores.

Heda the horse comes after that.

They have a goat. Small thing, Clarke saw it being sold to small and bought it home. You havent been to the Griffin's farm if you weren't headbutted by that angry baby.

Lastly Wanheda comes to them to keep Heda so company.

#letter opened #farm clexa

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bababaka · 2 years ago

Text

Clexa x reader headcannons

Part 2

English is not my first language, so if you catch a grammar mistake or have any tips to help me improve, just send me a message.

Write what you wanna see in the world.

If ends up being too OOC i apologize.

That's it. Hope you enjoy.

Part 1

Warnings: mentions of sex(nothing TOO detailed), violence.

- You were a desertor. A traitor. To both your nation and the aliance.

- Nobody would want you. So. You hid.

- Did what you did best and pretended to be someone else. And it worked.

- You found a little village. And set roots there. Though you were still a stranger, an outcast.

- You kept to yourself.

- You would hunt. Cook. Clean. Sell.

- You were the mysterious outsider. It shed some light on you. But not enough.

- To them, you were just an outcast. Dishonored. That left battle.

- In a way, they were right.

- In your time there, you caught winds of rumors, news from the world you once left behind.

- Some didn't make sense, like the army of Azgeda being possessed by demons and Heda were the one to defeat them all.

- You had no doubt she took a lot of them down though.

- You were relieved. She won. She survived. She's alive.

- Queen Nia lost. Maybe even died. You don't know if you should mourn her.

_ In a weird way, you cared. Not as little as you hoped, and not as much as you feared. But enough to make you confuse. Not knowing how to react.

- You ended up gathering informations. (Some habits never die)

- You learned Heda rescued her people on the mountain.

- Skaikru and Azgeda were both banned from the coalition.

- You also learned of the girl that singlehandlely killed all moutainmen. Wanheda.

- For months on end, you stayed like that. Hunting. Selling. Trying to get news from the world.

- And yet, for months, you were alone.

- Until you were not.

Your relationship with Clarke

- Strangers to friends with benefits to lovers :)

- You never talked directly to Clarke, but you saw her. Killing Finn, with Lexa, when Gustus died. You knew what she looked like.

- So, the red hair didn't fooled you.

- She tells you a fake name.

- You never say anything, though. You understood the need to run. The need for anonimity so you don't confront her about it.

- You take her into your cot.

- At first, you wouldn't talk much to each other. And, when you did, never about your life, about the past.

- You develop a dinamic of some sorts. If she hunted, you would cook. If you hunted, she would cook.

- But you always went to the village alone to sell what you hunt.

- Sometimes, though, she would let some things about her slip.

- Like when got hurt hunting, and while she was taking care of you, you asked how she knew so much about healing. She gave you a look, the one that meant you were bordering subjects that were forbidden. She sighed and murmured something along the line of "i learned from my mother".

- You didn't press for more. You never do.

- Sometimes, you'd surprise and scare Clarke with your silent footsteps.

- She'd flinch and reach for her gun.

- The first time that happened, you also reach for your knives.

- Both always are armed. She with her guns and you with your knives.

- Clarke would sometimes murmur a curse in another language. English, you recognize. You weren't very good at it, but caught some words. "Fuck" being a constant one.

- You would complain about the bullets in her killings. That it made it difficult to cook and soured the meat.

- She would scoff and tell you to do better.

- The next day, you apperead with a smug smile and a bigger animal in your hands.

- You teach her how to hunt. She already knew some stuff, obviously. But you taught her how to be more efficient.

- Sometimes, Clarke would be sad and angry. Her humour very unsteady.

- She was hurting. So were you.

- Somedays, she wouldn't get out of bed. Others, it would be you.

- With time, you formed an unspoken agreement. When one was in such state, the other would bring them food and take care of the house.

- You liked that. You liked not being alone anymore.

- You don't really know how that happened, but you and Clarke start having sex.

- The first time was when Clarke was upset with something. And to that point, you started to care about her.

- Her snarky humour, acid words, standoffish behaviour but still caring, still soft.

- You tried to talk to Clark. Try to help. Though that wasn't something you two did. Too personal. Too close to open wounds.

- You did, anyways.

- Amidst that, somehow, your lips met. And later you were in bed.

- You don't know if it were you or Clarke, that iniciated the first kiss. It didn't matter. Not when her body was pressed against yours, her moans so close to your ears.

- You don't talk about it in the next day.

- You never discuss the nature of your relationship. You just let it happen.

- And it happens. Again and again.

- And despite yourself, knowing you shouldn't, you feel your heart being shot, ensnared by the girl of blue eyes.

- So when two weeks later, she doesn't come back from hunting, you grow anxious and panicked.

- Maybe she left you. But what if she didn't?

- You weren't a tracker as good as Ronan, but you were enough. And felt an urgence rise in you when you noticed traces of fights. Clarke were taken.

- When you saw the traces led you to Polis, your heart grew restless. But you kept going.

- And almost turned away when you learned she was brought to Lexa.

- You were determined, though. So, you spent days relearning the routes of the guards and where Clarke was being kept.

- You thought it was weird when you saw her not in a cell, but in a room. For guests.

- "Clarke, wake up!" you whispered in the middle of a night. She got up in a flash.

- "Yn?? What the fuck are you doing here?"

- "Getting you out! So, come with me. The guard is set to come back in 3 minutes!"

- "What do you mean 'leave'? I can't leave! I don't want to!"

- "what do you mean 'you don't want to leave'?"

- Needless to say, you were caught. If Clarke fucking followed you, you would've made it. This was not on your skills. It was on Clarke.

- More guards were on you in a second.

- Clarke tried to help. To tell them to go easy on you. Which made their work harder. You don't go easy on them.

- But, you were overwhelmed shortly.

- Doesn't take long for Lexa to appear. And you both freeze. You stop resisting.

- She recovers her posture faster than you.

- "Throw them in the cells."

- You gulped. Looking down.

- You hear Clarke's voice. But you have no idea what she was saying.

- Only later Clarke realize you called her for her real name.

- You stay at the cell for days. Alone.

- Clarke had left you.

- After what you think is 3 days (you counted by the meals), Clarke came.

- She was gorgeous. Blonde hair. Green facepaint making blue eyes stand uot even more. A dress you knew to be for special ocasions.

- She looked like a goddess. You almost feel compeled to kneel over.

- "Well, you look... Good, Wanheda. Fitting for a leader just like you."

-" Why didn't you tell me you knew who i was?"

- "It's not like you were the most honest and open person."

- "How long have you known?"

-"I've always known."

- She just looks at you for a few moments.

- "Who are you, really?"

- "Didn't the commander tell you that already? Or Indra and Titus? I'm sure they would be thrilled to fill you in."

- "I heard enough from them. I wanna hear from you."

- "It's a long story. Don't you have somewhere else to be?" you point to the clothes.

- "I have time." she leans against the wall.

- Not seeing why not, you start to tell your tale. About being trained as an assassin since a child, given the task to spy and murder Lexa.

- You don't say why you gave up on finishing your assignment.

- " So, i ran, hid, you came in and i took you in and here we are."

- Clarke doesn't speak. She keeps you under her scrutinizing gaze.

- You look away.

- "When I realized you were taken, I... Thought you needed help." You look at her attire and your surroundings. " Clearly that wasn't the case."

- She sighs from where she was seated. " I was taken. But everything has been sorted out."

- "I can see that."

- "Why didn't you kill Lexa?"

- You shrug. "Didn't feel like it. Why have you stayed? For you to run away and taken back by force, well, i take you and Heda aren't on the best terms... At least not anymore.

- It takes a few moments for Clarke to respond, but eventually she does.

- "She betrayed me. She left me alone on the Mount Whether."

- "Looks like Heda isn't that different from me."

- "We all make mistakes and things we regret thinking it was the best."

- "...Did you forgive her? You are too kind, Wanheda."

- "I gave her a second chance."

- For a moment, the silence reigns.

- You huff. "What have you came here for, Clarke?"

- She looks unsure then, and avoids your eyes.

- "I guess i wanted to know if the you that i knew was true."

- "It wasn't like you were truthful."

- "So it was all a lie?"

- "You lower your voice to almost a whisper. Hoping if you were quiet enough, maybe, you wouldn't feel as exposed "No, it wasn't."

- She nods and gets up to leave, but not before saying "For what it's worth, it wasn't a lie to me either."

- And she leaves you with all that conversation spiraling in you head.

- "It wasn't a lie." Your heart felt lighter.

...

Part 3

#Clexa x reader #clexa headcannons #clarke griffin #lexa kom trikru #Clarke x reader #Lexa x reader #the 100 #my fics

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hmsharmony · 2 years ago

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Tagged by @hondagirll to list my top 9 books. Caveat that many other books could have made it on here, and choosing came down to which books caught my eye while scrolling through my five-star reads. The only ones that are permanent fixtures are probably 1., 2., and 5.

1. Dancing Shoes by Noel Streatfeild. My ultimate comfort book. When I was 10 or 11 my mom gifted me Ballet Shoes, Theater Shoes (aka Curtains Up), and Dancing Shoes (Wintle’s Wonders). I don’t remember when I first read them, but what I do recall is sixth grade outdoor education, when I was desperately homesick (and actually sick with a bad cold) and would curl up at night in my bunk with Dancing Shoes. Maybe it was because that book was a comfort when I was dealing with my separation anxiety, but as much as I loved the other two books, Dancing Shoes is the one that captured my heart. Rachel Lennox is one of my favorite characters of all time. A ten-year-old girl trying to step up after her mother’s untimely death, convinced she must be the responsible one and keep her sister on track. Sacrificing and sacrificing when no one has asked for it, when no one really wants it, all because she’s convinced herself this is how she does right by her mother. I have read or listened to this story at least 100 times, and it never fails to bring me comfort.

2. Emma by Jane Austen. A self-involved but well-intentioned protagonist! Long time friends turned more! “I cannot make speeches, Emma. If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.” All things I love, but the reason this book has stuck with me is probably because it was the subject of a literary criticism paper I wrote in 11th grade. I lived and breathed Emma (both the book and the contemporary criticism of it) for a good two months, and it left an indelible print on my heart.

3. Saving Francesca by Melina Marchetta. The love and care Marchetta gives to her characters. I was a blubbering mess reading this book. It’s one of my favorite coming of age stories, with a focus on Francesca’s relationship with her mother (the latter of whom is suffering from depression) and the friendships Francesca builds at her new school. This is reminding me I need a reread.

4. Under a Cruel Star: A Life in Prague, 1941-1968 by Heda Margolius Kovaly. I haven’t read this book since my sophomore modern European history class in college, but I remember how much it meant to see a story about antisemitism in Europe that doesn’t end in 1945. So few people talk about it—the DP camps, the pogroms, the Soviet persecution. Around this same time we watched Life is Beautiful for my Holocaust and Post-Holocaust reflections class, and I remember how angry, how frustrated I was that the ending made it seem like liberation was the end of the suffering. This is one of the books I routinely encourage people to read if their Holocaust education only went through 1945.

5. Night by Elie Wiesel. This is a favorite for a slightly odd reason: this is the book that helped me find my “voice” in academic writing. It was one of the last books we read in 11th grade AP Lang, and my teacher had spent the year pushing us to find our voice, and I had struggled to understand because “I wrote the essay how could it not be in my voice!” Looking back, given my personal connection to the Holocaust, it makes sense that Night would be the book that broke through in that particular way (that said, I wouldn’t realize the extent of the effect of my Holocaust trauma until a year and a half later, when my pop pop died, so at the time I WAS surprised this book turned out to be the key). The struggle to hold onto religion, to believe in a higher power, in the face of genocide is one that I have struggled with almost my entire life, albeit often at an unconscious level. Wiesel’s struggle with the same was the subject of my essay, and I put myself into every word of that paper.

6. The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern. From my 2015 Goodreads review: “There are those books that, when I reach the end, I smile. Those are the really good ones. And then there are the ones where I'm in tears -- not because of emotional manipulation or because the story was sad, but because the writing is so beautiful, the story so moving, that I'm reduced to tears.“ The deftness with which Morgenstern threaded together the time periods, the second and third person POVs, the seemingly disparate narratives still haunts me.

7. We Were the Lucky Ones by Georgia Hunter. Another personal one for me. So much of studying the Holocaust is, understandably, sadness and horror. And when you’re a survivor descendent? It’s knowing your existence comes at the expense of 6 million Jews. It’s looking at your family tree and seeing every branch but one cut off. So to know that there was one family where the branches survived? Against all the odds, in the face of indescribable evil? Again, from my Goodreads review: “I'm not sure there are words for how much this book means to me. To know that an entire Jewish family made it out alive... it's overwhelming to be honest.”

8. In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan. I don’t know what to say other than this book is a goddamn fucking delight. The trope subversions in this book are perfection, and I grin every time I think of the chaotic, messy trio.

9. Record of a Spaceborn Few by Becky Chambers. God, no one does found family like Chambers. Every single book in this series reduced me to tears, but this one resonated with me in particular, perhaps because this installment is entirely character driven, with a focus on the every day. It’s like a fictional popular history take on the future.

Tagging @reasontoshine, @lissomelle, @malinaa, @jamietaylr, @therabbitcatcher and anyone else who wants to do this because it’s nearly 1 am and my brain is blanking

#books #sometimes this becomes a way too personal blog #meme time

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bigg1999 · 2 years ago

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🤲🤲 You have any more Depths of Love by chance you could share? By chanceee?

I don't have any Depths of Love ready to share just yet...

But hopefully, you've read Stardust? Here's a scrapped scene from Warrior of the Universe.

Lexa looks up to the rearview mirror, watching as her ten-year-old son gets into the car, throwing his bag down. She waits a moment, watching, making sure to hear the click of the seatbelt before she drives off. Silence fills the car, the radio on low, unlike their normal chats after school.

Halfway home with still no words, she sighs, causing him to look up, green eyes that mirror her own meeting hers in the mirror.

"Do you want to talk about whatever is bothering you, or do you want to be grumpy?" Lexa questions, focus going back to the road.

"I'm not bothered, I'm just angry," he defends, causing Lexa's mouth to quirk up slightly in amusement.

"Alright, still. Do you want to talk about it?" She asks again, turning on her blinker as they make another turn.

"No."

"Alright, then I'll talk about my day. Let's see, I had a terrible meeting first thing with all the board members. It was fine, I just had to remind them I'm in charge. Then your mother surprised me for lunch before she went to see Octavia and Lincoln and then I had..." Lexa continues on, knowing her son isn't listening, but filling the space with sound as she drives the rest of the way home, pulling into the driveway.

"Make sure you do your homework before you start playing," Lexa says as they enter the house, Danny kicking off his shoes in a rush, and heading to his room.

Lexa sighs, shaking her head at both his pair and another, kicked off at the door in the walkway. She fixes it, moving them both to the mat before putting her keys up on the hook, venturing further into the house to find the owner of the other pair.

She grins when she finds the blonde in her studio, earbuds in and obvious to the world around her, focused on a painting. Lexa grins, seeing it's a painting of their son in the universe they created. His blonde hair is wild, and his striking green eyes stand out against the dark warpaint around his eyes, that trails down his cheeks like Heda's does, only his goes above his brows too, and there's a cut out where his skin shows through, resembling Wanheda's.

Lexa waits for Clarke to step away from the painting, surprising her by wrapping her in a hug. Clarke yells in surprise, not realizing the brunette was there, but quickly laughs at herself. She sinks into the warm body behind her, tilting her head to she side to allow the brunette to press some kisses to the side of her neck as she sets down the paintbrush on the bench and taps the screen of her phone, turning off the music to her wireless earbuds.

"Hi, baby," Clarke smiles, hands wrapping around Lexa's around her midsection.

"He looks amazing," Lexa compliments the painting, resting her head on Clarke's shoulder.

"Thank you. I'm still unsure about the war paint design, maybe I should ask him about it," Clarke confesses.

"It's a little of both of us, I think it's great. Speaking of," Lexa sighs, releasing her hold on the blonde, allowing her to turn around, "He's upset about something."

"Something?" Clarke questions.

"Mhm, he wouldn't talk to me about it."

Clarke sighs, her brows scrunching in confusion, "He didn't talk to you?"

"Nope. Just said he's angry," Lexa relies her known information.

"Weird. Maybe I'll go ask him about the warpaint and talk," Clarke suggests.

"I'll get started on dinner."

Clarke grins, looking into green eyes and sharing a kiss before heading their separate ways. Lexa hums to herself, cooking dinner by herself, listening to the sounds of a video game coming from the living room. Hushed voices as Lexa assumes mother and son discuss. She calls them to dinner, happy to find her son is back to usual, chatting about his day as they eat.

Over dinner, Clarke suggests they watch a movie together. They all agree, settling on Brother Bear. After the movie, Danny heads to bed, only having fallen asleep "a little bit," he defends.

"So, he all good?" Lexa questions after Danny's door shuts.

"One of his friends said something offensive and it upset him," Clarke says with a sigh, "He's got such a good heart."

"Offensive?" Lexa questions, following Clarke's lead and heading to the bedroom.

"Homophobic. Transphobic. You know how kids are," Clarke says with a shrug, crawling into bed.

Lexa sighs, "Sadly, that I do. Wish we still didn't have to deal with that shit though. Wish our kid didn't have to deal with it," Lexa admits softly, climbing in after the blonde.

"He's a strong boy, he'll handle it."

*-*-*

"You know that's not true," Danny defends, glaring at Donnie.

"Come on Danny. Just because you're cool doesn't mean that your mom's are," Donnie defends with a scoff, rolling his eyes, "Like my dad says, women are only good for two things-"

"Just shut up dude," Danny rolls his eyes, grabbing his lunch tray, ready to move tables.

"Hey, it's alright. I mean, your mom, technically, is straight. Your other one just likes to dress up, it's cool."

"What did you say?" Danny questions, still standing, looking at the boy across from him.

"Come on, everybody can tell. It's not like he looks like a woman," Donnie laughs.

"Both of my moms are women!" Danny growls, green eyes burning.

"Yeah, just like I'm sure her hair is blonde," Donnie scoffs, rolling his eyes, "I mean, her boobs are nice to look at, but you can tell they're fake a mile away."

Danny's brows furrow in confusion.

"Blonde?"

"I mean he didn't even change his name. He could've at least changed his name to something better than Clarke."

All of the anger that Danny had felt, boiling under his skin, disappears. He looks at the boy in front of him, and laughs, shaking his head as he grabs his tray.

"You're a joke, and your hate is a joke," Danny says, walking away, leaving the other boy stunned.

*-*-*

"How was school today?" Lexa questions, watching as Danny climbs in.

"It was good," Danny says with a laugh, grinning as he does his seatbelt, "I talked with Mom yesterday about my friend being stupid, and I told him today."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. He's not my friend anymore. He's homophobic, transphobic, and sexist, and I don't need that."

"No, I agree. You do not need friends like that," Lexa hums, focusing on the road.

"He's so stupid. He tried to make me upset by saying you aren't a woman, but he's so dumb, he thought Mom was the one who's transgender. He says you can tell, but he thinks it's the wrong mom," Danny says with a laugh.

Lexa hums, brows raising in surprise, "Really?"

"Yeah. Said her boobs are too big," Danny rolls his eyes.

Lexa chuckles, blush coating her cheeks, "I don't think either one of you is old enough to be looking at boobs yet."

"His dad is a poop, he probably said it," Danny confesses with a sigh as they pull into their driveway.

"Yes baby, most hate starts at home," Lexa admits softly, following her son.

"Mom!" Danny calls as they enter the house.

"What's up?" Clarke answers from the couch, looking up to the doorway.

"You were right, Donnie didn't know what he was talking about! He thinks you're transgender!"

Clarke laughs, "What?"

"Yeah!"

"I guess that's because your mother is just so beautiful," Clarke says, meeting green eyes and sending a wink.

Lexa can't help her cheeks turning pink as her son agrees with a cheer, shaking her head as she heads into the house to kiss her wife.

#clexa #lovely anon #ask answered #stardust #DJ Griffin #asks answered #asks open #asks welcome

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