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blackcoffeeandteardrops · 5 years ago

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Finally got around to writing my post FFH fic. Family reunions, just the way I like it. Under the cut & also at the above link.

The staccato beat of Pepper's heels hammering against the floor caused Peter's heartbeat to quicken as he slowly opened the door to the lake house.

"Listen, I have already been on hold for ten minutes. I don't care that he's in the middle of a meeting, go in there and get him out. I'm staying on the line until you do," Pepper said, clutching her phone to her ear, turning just as Peter made his way into the house. "Hi, Peter. You guys made the trip okay?"

Peter let out a shaky laugh. That she could go from demanding to motherly in the matter of seconds was slightly alarming, but considering the fact she genuinely was a mother, he guessed that probably shouldn't come as too much of a surprise. He jerked his thumb over his shoulder, letting his suitcase fall to the floor with a thud. "Happy is out with Aunt May getting the rest of the bags from the car. Thank you, by the way, for--" the rest of the sentence dies on his lips as Pepper held up a finger, pointing to her phone and smiling apologetically before striding off into the kitchen, berating whoever was on the other end as she did so.

"And this is the last of them," Happy said, wheeling two suitcases in, looking about as he did so. The sound of Pepper raising her voice from the other room seemed to satisfy whatever question he'd had, so he focused back on Peter as May came in, closing the door behind them. "I'm not sure what rooms she has you two in, but--"

"I do!" Morgan exclaimed, quickly bounding down the stairs, all but tumbling into Peter's legs when she ran to greet them. "Mommy said you guys are coming for a sleepover! She even said we could have cheeseburgers for dinner, and we can eat on the couch! They usually don't let me do that, but mommy said it's a special oca…" she paused, fiddling with her sleeve and furrowing her brow as she tried mastering the more complex word. "Occasion," she declared, grinning proudly, oblivious in the way only a child can be of the chaos that had brought them there. "Plus, it'll be even cooler when you find out--"

"Morgan, sweetheart, why don't you help me set up dinner, hmm?" Happy chimed, gently nudging the girl towards the living room as he removed the sack of burgers from where he'd carried it at his side.

Peter frowned, as if he was missing something, but before he got the chance to dissect it any further, Pepper strode back in the room, nodding at May in greeting. "I've spoken to the lawyers, who are drafting a cease and desist as we speak. We also have a team digging into how and why the Daily Bugle got that video in the first place. It doesn't cover all our bases, but it's a start."

"What about the other sources that have picked up the story since the video was plastered over every screen in the city? You can't unring a bell, and Peter can't exactly hide here forever," May said trying to be a voice of reason, only to have Peter cry out in frustration beside her.

"Peter is standing right here! Is--is it even safe to be here? Safe for you and Morgan, I mean. I don't want anybody to be at risk because of me," he replied, anxiety bubbling in his gut. The scent of the burgers wafted over and it was nearly enough to knock him over. Within minutes of the video playing the first time, Happy had somehow tracked him down, driven MJ home, and then gone to the apartment to where Aunt May was already halfway through packing their things. He hadn't had a chance to even think about food until that moment.

"Here is essentially the safest and most secure place you could ever be. Besides, Peter, you're family. We want to help you as best we can," Pepper replied, resting a hand on his shoulder. "Let's get you something to eat. We'll worry about the rest later, okay?"

Peter nodded reluctantly, her use of the word "We" sticking out like a sore thumb in his mind. Pepper meant her and Morgan, of course, but it was moments like this that made him miss Tony more than ever. How Tony would react was something he'd caught his mind drifting to several times throughout the car ride to the lake house, and he couldn't help hoping his mentor turned pseudo-father would have been there to help him figure out what to do. Pepper's heart was in the right place, threatening legal action and offering him a place to stay until the dust settled, but Peter felt off kilter in a way he figured only Tony would understand. Sure, Tony had a hand in revealing his own superhero identity to the masses, he wasn't immediately labeled a villain or looked at in mock horror by his closest friends--the look of shock MJ had upon watching the video still burned in his mind--but he still badly wanted to have Tony's support. The fact he was gone weighed heavier on him, just as he looked up to see May and Pepper watching him expectantly. "What?"

"She asked if you wanted to eat," May supplied, eyes brimming with concern.

"Yeah. Totally," Peter replied, forcing himself to act positive when he caught Morgan glancing over at him. The last thing he wanted was having to make her worry about him, too. He sat on the couch, pointing to the bag as Morgan sat cross legged at the coffee table near his feet, ketchup staining the corners of her mouth. "You think there's a cheeseburger in there for me?" he asked, watching as she all but leaped into action, happy to help him and triumphantly pulling a foil wrapped burger from the sack. It was enough, at least for a few minutes, to sit among friends and eat food, while some Disney sequel he knew nothing about played in the background. He was lulled into a sense of safety, of warmth and protection he feared he'd never experience again, so much so that the sound of feet shuffling into the room behind them didn't even alarm him, despite the fact that everyone he knew to be present was already accounted for.

Three things happened almost at once. First, he realized there was another burger sitting wrapped on the table, though everyone had already eaten. Second, he saw Tony's jacket draped over the arm of the chair, as if he'd come right back for it. And third, he heard someone that sounded like but couldn't possibly be Tony, clearing his throat and speaking behind them.

"You guys seriously ate without me?"

“You’re supposed to me resting,” Pepper said, immediately jumping up from where she’d been sitting. “Besides, we talked about--”

Peter pressed his hands to his ears, squeezing his eyes shut tight, as if doing so would cause him to fade away from his current surroundings. It wasn’t possible, it wasn’t. He had to have slipped into an alternate reality somehow, or maybe he’d been trapped in one of Mysterio’s more elaborate schemes. He felt sure that if he were to turn around, Tony wouldn’t be standing behind him. He simply couldn’t.

“Oh, my God,” May said beside him. Distantly, he heard the sound of what he knew to be her glass hitting the floor. “But--”

“I know, we have some explaining to do. And we’d like to, but--”

“This isn’t real,” Peter said, willing himself to stand and turn to face the man he’d so badly wanted to see. Standing mere feet away with only the couch separating them was Tony, looking a bit worse for wear but nonetheless alive. “No, you couldn’t...you wouldn’t lie…”

“Hey, kid, I get it. You’re mad. I’d be mad, too. But I didn’t lie. I never--”

Peter started shaking his head, hot tears burning his eyes. Absently, he heard Pepper instruct Happy to take Morgan upstairs and help her get ready for bed. May was still sitting on the couch, clueless but somehow less angry than he was.

“Peter, honey, I’m sure there’s a valid reason. He’s been through a lot, we all have,” she said, trying and failing to be the voice of reason.

“I almost just died, again, trying to save everyone. You...you could have helped. You could’ve come--”

“And what? I’m only at about sixty percent my normal strength, with one real arm and one robotic one that still needs tinkering. I wouldn’t have been any good for you,” Tony replied, apologetic. For a moment, he thought he’d maybe gotten through. Peter rounded the couch, andTony turned, opening his arms, only for Peter to breeze right past him towards the door.

“I told you we shouldn’t rush him,” Pepper said, clinging to Tony’s good shoulder when he tried running after him. “He needs time.”

“And what? I’m just supposed to sit holed up in my room until I’m instructed to make my grand appearance?” he said, spinning to face her, all frustration fading when he saw the look on her face. “I’m sorry, Pep. But some jackass that tried to kill him just blasted his name all over the world so now everyone knows who Spiderman is, and now they’re going to paint him as a villain. And what’s more, this guy used to work for me. You can’t seriously think I’m going to stand idly by, do you?”

“No, I don’t. I know enough about you to know it’s taking about every ounce of strength you have to not go running after him right now. But what he needs right now is a chance to cool off, come to his senses. Once he realizes?” Pepper said, locking eyes with Tony and raising an eyebrow, hoping he understood.

“It’s a little crazy, he’s not biologically related to you, Tony,” May said, standing awkwardly from where she’d been sitting on the couch. “But he gets a lot of his behavior from you. It’s nice to know that you’re, uh…” she gestured vaguely between them before pointing towards the stairs. “I’m going to go see if Happy needs any help with Morgan.”

Pepper nodded, watching as May headed upstairs. “And I’m going to clean up and jump on another call. We need to stay on top of this thing,” she said, opening the front door just a crack in case she might get a glimpse of Peter. She paced back to Tony, cupping his cheek and leaning in to give him a kiss. “Give him a few minutes and then you can go check on him, okay?”

Tony leaned into her touch, holding her hand to his face and turning to plant a kiss against her palm. “I’ll do my best.”

Peter sat on the dock, his legs dangling over the edge. He’d walked around the property, getting more comfortable with the place he’d only been a few times, stopping to give Gerald some berries, before settling to stare out at the water. He didn’t actually intend to leave, just needed some time to think, but when he heard footsteps behind him, he tensed up ready to bolt.

“If you want me to leave, I will. Although, I mean, this is my house. I kind of come with the territory of you hiding out here,” Tony said, waiting a few seconds to see if Peter would run before settling in beside him. He watched as Peter tore fragments from a weed he’d picked, slowly tossing them into the water, not even bothering to look up at him. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine,” Peter replied, dabbing at his eye with his sleeve.

Tony sighed, wishing it were easier. “No, it’s not. None of this is. There’s not a guide book for how to help your superhero kid get through having his identity revealed,” he said, glancing over to see if Peter would react. There was a hint of an uptick in his closed lips, but not much. “I hate what he did to you, but we’re going to fix it.”

“It wouldn’t have happened had you been there. You were just relaxing here, just living your life, not even bothering to tell me or anyone else that you weren’t, you know, dead. And I show up here because Pepper is nice enough to let us stay, and I’m just supposed to...what? Act like it’s normal? It’s not,” Peter said, slamming his fist onto the dock so hard it shook. “I gave him your glasses because I really thought he was a good man. I told him he was an Avenger, and he just sat there and lied to my face. My friends almost died because of--”

“Because of you? Believe me kid, I know the feeling,” Tony replied, laughing self deprecatingly. He shook his head, staring out at the reflection of the moon over the water. It seemed unthinkable, that everything be so calm despite all that had happened recently. “And for the record? Until recently, I wasn’t just here living my life, as you so nicely put it. This thing here?” he said, waggling the fingers on his artificial arm. “Wakandan tech. After the battle with Thanos, I was as good as dead. They took me to Wakanda where I was in a medically induced coma. Countless skin grafts, surgeries, and when I woke up? I was alive, but every inch of my body burned. It was like I was cooking from the inside. I might’ve been alive, but I didn’t want to be. Not for a long while. But when I was well enough to speak, to make sure I’d make it through? They flew Pepper down, and we stayed for a few more weeks. It took Morgan a while to get used to it, but she’s come around. Physical therapy, medication, and rest...it’s about all I can do.”

“It looks so real,” Peter replied, shaking his head as he watched Tony grip a therapy ball in what he now knew to be an artificial hand. “Miss Potts wasn’t angry when she found out you were alive?”

“Oh, she was livid. It’s still a point of contention. But she was more angry with the situation than with me,” Tony replied, tossing the ball in the air and catching it. He smiled triumphantly, waggling the ball in Peter’s direction. “It took me two weeks to learn how to do that.”

“To catch a ball?” Peter asked, doubtful.

“This may look real, and it’s wired into my body with the best neural interface I’ve ever seen...so good I’m jealous I didn’t create it myself. But yes, two weeks to catch a ball. At least twice that long to put any sort of pressure on it. Pepper can testify. Until recently, I haven’t been fun to be around,” Tony replied, watching as Peter nodded slowly. “Look, Pete,” he said, darting his tongue out to moisten his lips. “You really think I didn’t want to be there? You honestly think I was content just sitting idly by while one of my kids was in danger? It was terrifying. But it would’ve been worse had I gone and not been able to stop it. I’d never be able to forgive myself. I was monitoring the systems, watching...if there was ever any moment that I really doubted you’d be okay? I’d have put a stop to it,” he swore, giving it a few seconds to sink in. He expected Peter to jump in, lauding him with tales of what happened in his Europe trip, of how he’d fought, but was met only with silence. “Pete, I’m--”

“One of your kids?” Peter replied, his voice cracking.

“That’s what you picked up on in all that?” Tony replied. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. They’d not been very good with the whole emotional thing before the blip. He hadn’t communicated the way he thought of Peter as one of his own, but the way the boy’s eyes lit up at the implication made him realize that he wanted to try and be clearer with his line of thinking. “Well, yeah. You’re one of Tony Stark’s roaming band of misfits,” he replied, elbowing him in the side. “Seriously though, how are you holding up? It’s not every day your cover gets blown to the world.”

“At least you had a choice,” Peter replied, closing his eyes upon realizing how bitter he sounded. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it that way. I just meant that--”

“That I didn’t have my cover blown by a psychotic maniac bent on revenge from beyond the grave? Yeah, I get it. Not quite the same,” Tony agreed. “Pep’s in there doing the best she can to keep this under control. It won’t be easy, and it’ll take some time, but we’ll get you there.”

Peter’s chest grew tight and he shook his head, struggling to keep his breathing calm. Were it not for his certainty that Tony would jump in after him, he’d kick off the dock and make himself sink, if for nothing other than feeling something other than the crushing weight of trying to make his new reality make sense. He dug his fingernail into his palm so tightly it began to bleed.

“Breathe,” Tony replied, rubbing small circles against his back. “In through your nose, out through your mouth,” he continued, gritting his teeth. That anyone would put someone he cared about through so much pain and him be at a relative loss to stop it was maddening, but the least he could do was try and help him through it. He watched as Peter’s breathing returned to normal, waiting until the boy appeared calm to keep speaking. “That’s not the first time that’s happened, is it?”

Peter hung his head, shrugging his shoulders, but surprisingly not feeling as embarrassed as he might've expected. "I haven't exactly been sleeping well since everybody came back," he conceded.

"I'm sorry, Pete," Tony replied, clapping his hand against the boy's shoulder. He watched as his lips twitched; a fraction of a smile, there and gone within a second. The image of Peter's body dissolving into ash and slipping through his fingers flickered across his vision. He'd spent more time mourning Peter it seemed like than actually knowing him, a fact he thought about not for the first time. "I shouldn't have drug you into this. I shouldn't have put you at risk, allowed you to participate in the Avengers. If I hadn't, none of this would've happened."

Peter started shaking his head before Tony even finished speaking. "I chose to jump on the ship. I mean, I didn't do it knowing I'd die...sort of...on some alien planet, but I still chose to do it."

"You did," Tony agreed.

"I was on a date," Peter said, the words popping out before he realized what he'd said. "Before the video where Mysterio told the world I was Spiderman. MJ and I were finally--"

"That friend of yours? You finally told her how you felt?" Tony asked, genuinely curious. Peter wasn't yelling at him anymore, and if he was still angry at him he was no longer showing it, so he considered it a step in the right direction. "Before...everything," he continued, gesturing wildly. "We were in the lab. You were up way, way past your bedtime, getting to that point where you were practically delirious, and you started talking about her. It's good, I'm happy for you."

"I'm not," Peter replied, gripping the edge of the deck and leaning forward. "The look on her face when that video played? I don't think she'll want to see me anymore. Besides, I don't want to put her in danger," he paused, cheeks burning red. "You've got enough to worry about right now, what with coming back from the dead and all," he continued, giving Tony a pointed look. "You don't wanna hear about what I'm going through."

"Whose idea do you think it was for you to come here? I'm kidding, it was Pepper's, but I backed her up one hundred percent. I wouldn't have done that if I didn't care about you," Tony insisted. He heard Peter let out a soft laugh and frowned in confusion. "What?"

Peter stared up at the pin prick stars, remembering vaguely what it felt like to hurtle through them. "We never used to talk like this."

Tony could count on his one hand the times he'd hugged Peter, and on the same hand the number of times they'd had such serious discussions, in non-life threatening situations. It wasn't intentional, a by-product of the facade he'd hid behind over the years. He hadn't had a good relationship with his own father, Lord knew, so it made sense that he'd struggle communication wise with the child he considered his own. Still, he vowed before bringing them all back that he'd do a better job at it. "No, we didn't," he replied. "But as it turns out, losing fifty percent of the world's population including the protege you love like a son, getting married to the smartest woman on the planet, and becoming a dad before nearly dying at the hands of an evil alien bent on destruction really changes your outlook on life."

"Pepper's the smartest woman on the planet?"

Tony rolled his eyes. "Of course she is. She's going to figure out how to get you out of this mess," he replied, already picturing her pacing back and forth inside demanding answers from whoever she was on the phone with. He shifted a little, wincing as he felt a sharp pain radiate up his side. He held up his arm in Peter's direction. "Come on, kid. Help me up. Let's see what progress she's made so far."

"Are you okay? I mean, you survived despite the power of those stones literally coursing through you, and seriously, how real your fake arm looks is kind of weirding me out, but--" he cast his eyes downward at the look on Tony's face. "Sorry, I didn't mean--"

"No, it's okay," Tony assured him. "They had to take a piece of my calf muscle to help fix the side of my face. But hey, I'm officially part robot now, so I guess I've got that going for me."

Peter smiled, feeling lighter than he had in a long time. As they walked towards the house, he caught a glimpse of Tony's scars, some of them faint but still proof of all he'd gone through in the name of keeping the world safe. Before he could stop himself, Peter launched himself at Tony, wrapping his arms around his waist. "I'm really, really glad you're okay."

Tony had nearly lost his balance from the unexpected hug, but he knew better than to look a gift horse in the mouth. He waited a few seconds before pulling back. "Me too, kid. And listen, about what you said before? About being afraid of whether MJ would want to see you anymore? If she feels half as much for you as you do for her, I think you're going to be fine."

Peter opened his mouth to speak, only to close it again. There'd be time to talk things through--with Tony, with MJ, with Aunt May--but he knew not everything would be solved overnight. "Should we go inside?"

Tony nodded, leading the way. He listened quietly for the sound of Pepper's voice, wanting to seek her out and discuss what their next steps were in terms of figuring out Peter's life post-identity reveal. He knew it would take time and some not altogether pleasant decisions, and there was a part of him that wondered just how well he could help whilst still being declared dead to the world. Still, that night all the people he cared for most would be under one roof, causing him to feel more relaxed and to breathe easier than he had in a long time. It wasn't much, but it was a start.

#tony stark #peter parker #ffh #iron dad and spider son #fanfic

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marvel-medigeek-fics · 6 years ago

Text

The H Word: Human

Part 4/?

Warnings: violence, angst, anxiety, language, PTSD mentions, blood

TW: anxiety attack(?)

Summary: The aftermath of giving a friend a bloody nose does not help the recurring symptoms of PTSD.

If you are struggling with the things mentioned or alluded to in this chapter, reach out to some you trust and find some way to get help. You don’t deserve to suffer, especially alone.

Word Count: 1836

After breaking Nat’s nose, or at least starting the waterworks of blood, you retreated to your room, bawling like a helpless baby. It was not a nice feeling to feel so out of control, yet so controlled by feelings, so strong, yet so weak.

Once you settled yourself onto your bed, it was hard to force yourself to even shift to a better position to mope. Everything was so fucking hopeless. So fucking hopeless. So fucking hopeless. So fucking helpless. So fucking helpless. So fucking hopeless. So fucking hopeless.

A knock startled you out of this endless mantra. “It’s Sam. Open up.” You knew he couldn’t get in, because you locked the door and jammed a chair under the door. You could hear him wriggle the knob, but it seemed like a mile to the door and another to open it.

“Come on, Y/N, open up.” The sound just sounded like static. More static. Was this a common thing? Static in the head. Did she get knocked out and this was just a hallucination? Concussions can cause hallucinations. So can psychological trauma. But trauma can cause anything, from internal bleeding to ingrown toenails. Including punching your best friend because you can’t control your fists.

Hopeless. So hopeless. So fucking hopeless. So fucking hopeless. Fucking hopeless. So hopeless. Hopeless. Hopeless. Helpless. Hopeless. Helpless. Hopeless. Helpless. Helpless. Hopeless. So fucking hopeless. Hopeless. Hopeless. It was almost like the words would choke you if you didn’t keep repeating them. Hopeless Helpless. Hopeless. Helpless. Hopeless. Helpless. So. Fucking. Hopeless. So Fucking— You didn’t realize Sam had broken down the door until he was cradling you like a baby. A fucking hopeless baby. Your other brain wanted to throw him off your bed and out of your life. But your brain, your real brain wanted to accept the gesture.

You had no idea how long you sat there, your other brain droning on until it became uncomfortable buzzing at worst. “Are you okay?” Sam asked, “You were shaking like a baby bird just learning how to fly.”

“Mostly peachy.” You said sitting up and hugging one knee to your chest. “How’s Nat?” It isn’t easy to go on after your brain decides to shut everything out, but you’d read once that going on like everything was normal would help. It wasn’t really, but it was distracting. Maybe that was what it had meant by help.

“You only broke her ego, if that’s what your asking. Her nose stopped bleeding in 5 minutes. She says she wants to talk to you as soon as Banner will clear her to take the wad of gauze out of her nose.”

You merely nodded, still jumpy about your reflexes and their breach of your control. “I think music will help. As it does. I’ll start with a song.” Sam said, scrolling through his phone for the song you had a strong feeling he was going to pick.

The opening chords of September wafted out from his crappy phone speaker. “I thought you were going to pick a Marvin Gaye song.” you teased.

“I’m full of surprises lately aren’t I?”

“No, Sam Wilson, you are the worst at surprises.”

“No, I’m definitely not the worst.”

“Then who is?”

He shrugged and started dancing to the peppy beat of the song. “Come on, dance, Y/N!”

Dancing had never been your thing and it sounded dorky, but you just wanted a nap and some chicken nuggets. So you curled up under the covers, extremely tired from the events of the day and also very emotionally drained from days of crying, but not really releasing anything.

—

Sam stayed in your room for a while but finally left once he realized you were dead asleep. His next stop was the little intern who he had assigned to track that son a bitch that had did this, the whole losing control, hidieholing away.

The intern had gotten no nice leads, except for the fact that he worked in a very high-security building. But security wouldn’t stop sam from avenging his girl.

—

It was very late when you finally got out of bed. You were starving. So starving you didn’t even notice Nat supping her coffee until you say down with a peanut butter sandwich in hand.

“Hello, Y/N.” She said calmly.

“Hey, Nat. How you doing?”

“Ego’s a bit bruised, but I’m alright. I didn’t know you had it in you.”

“To what?”

“To punch someone. You couldn’t even kill the wasp that stung you last week.”

“One, not the same thing. Two, I was kind of dying. I’m allergic to wasps remember?”

“I remember.”

“That wasn’t really me, anyway.”

“I know. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I suppose I should.”

“You don’t have to if you aren’t ready to.”

“I know.”

“Even if you won’t agree to talk, I do want to keep training with you.”

“Why me? I’m just a tactician. ”

“That’s exactly why.”

You rolled your eyes in reply.

“Besides, Wanda is with vision, Sam is a sore loser and Steve and Bucky are too busy working out in other ways.”

“What about Pietro, or Tony?”

“Pietro is terrible to fight andTony’s always distracted.”

“Tomorrow.“

“All right.”

You sat there in not talking until you finished your sandwich and Natasha drank her coffee.

“You know, Bucky’s experienced in that type of stuff. Maybe you could talk to him.” Nat broke the silence.

“Experienced in what type of stuff?” You asked, knowing full well what she was talking about.

“PTSD.”

“I don’t have PTSD.”

Nat raised her eyebrows and shrugged. “Whatever you say.”

“I’m serious. I don’t.”

“Are you just saying that because you want me to drop it?”

“Maybe.”

“I’ll tell him to come by after our training session. 9 am right?”

You nodded, knowing she wouldn’t let it go and Bucky would drop by no matter what you said.

—-

The next morning, you dragged yourself out of bed to go train with Nat. You downed a cup of coffee with extra sugar and then headed down to the training room.

The training room was full, just missing Clint and Pietro. Which was kind of relief but you couldn’t quite place why. Bucky and Steve were racing each other on the treadmills. Sam was using a virtual reality machine to work on agility. Wanda and Vision were throwing things at each other to work on their manipulation skills.

“Welcome to having your ass handed to you, Y/N,” Nat said when you made your way to the ring.

You merely made a noncommital grunting sound and sat down on the floor and began stretching.

“Today, we’re focusing on blocking. I noticed last time you aren’t the best at blocking. And by the best, I mean, you blocked one of my punches.”

“And? One is better than none.”

“True, but I threw 6.”

It was a long few hours of Nat throwing punches, some easy and some hard, for you to block. You managed to dodge most of them, but that was not the object of the session. Once, you caught her fist and wrenched it away, but it was the vaguest of reminders of someone else’s hands coming for you. You wouldn’t touch her after that, because it felt too much like losing control. Blood dries, but bones don’t heal as quickly.

“Come on, Y/N, just block another of my punches. Come on, please.”

After the third time, she asked, enough was enough. “No! I’m done. I can’t deal with the possibility of breaking you again. I couldn’t do that to someone else.” You voice began to break as Nat looked at you in shock.

“Come on, Y/N. It’s not like that.”

“It might as well be!! It’s all the same!! I’m learning how to defend myself, because, what, I couldn’t do it on the worst night of my life? What good is that going to do me now? A broken shell of a badass tactician, that’s who I am now! And how am I supposed to repair myself, when not all of the pieces are here?”

You began to bawl, again, so powerless to stop the emotions that had no business in the training room.

—-

Sam was lost in his virtual reality, mostly to work on agility, but also to find himself in a world that was not filled with fucked up people and power agendas. But then he heard someone yelling. Fuck.

By the time he got his headset off, you had bolted from the room and the rest of the Avengers were clustered like pigs. Crude reference, but no one said Sam was the linguist of the team.

“Is she okay?” Steve asked, knowing the answer, but breaking the obvious confusion in the room.

“I’ll go talk to her.” Bucky volunteered.

“I’ll come too.” Sam agreed with Steve’s and now his friend.

—-

Bucky and Sam were not the best at finding people who did not want to be found. It was almost 10 minutes before they found you under the stairwell three floors down.

“Hey,” Sam began softly, kneeling down to your level like he would an injured bird.

“Go away,” came the disgruntled reply.

“Not gonna happen,” Bucky piped up, provoking a reaction from you.

“Bucky.”

“Y/N.”

“Go away,” you replied, after a brief pause.

“Like he said, not gonna happen.” Sam reiterated.

“You’ll get tired eventually,” you replied sullenly.

“We have lots of patience, tacty. Well, he doesn’t, but he’s going to get some.” Bucky took over, pointing his last praise at Sam bitingly.

“I have lots of patience. I’m a damn bird whisperer.” Sam bit back.

“Back to the task at hand, bird whisperer.” Bucky turned back to you, “I bet that stairwell is mighty uncomfortable, how about we find a more spacious place to talk, hmm?”

You didn’t speak, because moving sounded like an effort, you couldn’t even think about exporting. But with a held out hand from Sam, who you still trusted, and the unwavering peace of Bucky, who you also still trusted, you finally emerged from the stairwell.

“Do you drink coffee?” Bucky asked when you had finally made it to one of the conference rooms that didn’t have floor to ceiling windows.

You didn’t usually, but this seemed like a good time to have a class.

You nodded at him, calmly taking your place at the table. Sam dropped into the seat beside you. “Do you want anyone else in here while we talk? A lawyer, maybe?” He sounded hopeful at the last part, but you shook your head, not yet, you said silently. He nodded understandingly, or at least feigning understanding.

Bucky sat the mug to your right and Sam’s to his left and then took his seat at the other end of the table. It was something right out of a movie, but movies don’t usually show all the pain that comes with having a round table discussion. Therapy session. Legal statement. Whatever. But this is definitely no movie.

Taglist: @leenat23

#avengers #avengers fanfiction #sam wilson x reader #marvel fanfiction #fanfiction #sam wilson #marvel #mmgfics

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americanahighways · 3 years ago

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Video Premiere: Molly Jenson "Goodbye"

Song Premiere: Molly Jensen "Goodbye" @mollyjenson @greglaswell #tonymancuso #tonydoesvideo @tinderboxmusic

Americana Highways is posting this premiere of Molly Jenson’s song “Goodbye,” the title track from her forthcoming album due to be available Aug 20. On “Goodbye,” Molly Jenson sang all the vocals. Greg Laswell played all the instruments. The video was produced by Molly Jenson andTony Mancuso, and directed, filmed and edited by Tony Mancuso. For a dive into the depths of vulnerability, try Molly…

View On WordPress

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granma-sweetie · 2 years ago

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andtoni o pandora

oh my fcuking god its

its antonio ponderas

MDNSMFJSNDJSBD WHAT

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sportsleague365 · 5 years ago

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The latest on the workout circuit: Cleveland Browns * DE Fadol Brown Houston Texans: * CBs Brian Allen and Adonis Alexander, RBs Byron Marshall andTony Brooks-James Minnesota Vikings * WR Maurice Harris Bunch of former Washington players making the rounds as Harris, Alexander, and Marshall are all ex-Redskins. Harris is probably the “biggest name” on this list, and this is his second NFC North visit in recent weeks as he worked out for the Lions at the beginning of the month. Last year with the ‘Skins, Harris had 28 catches for 304 yards. The Cal product reportedly had a solid camp with New England this offseason, but he was waived with an injury settlement after suffering a foot injury. #AdonisAlexander #BrianAllen #ByronMarshall

#AdonisAlexander #BrianAllen #ByronMarshall

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ao3feed-stony · 5 years ago

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The Mysterious Dissapearance of Captain America

by ALittleBattyLady

It's a beautiful day in Upstate New York where Tony Stark lives with his husband, the prolific War Hero Captain America. It's also their fifth anniversary. Presents are wrapped and loving touches exchanged, but when an alarming warning from JARVIS drags him away from work that very day, things take a dark turn. Handsome, Loving Steve Rogers is taken from his home leaving Tony Stark to scramble desperately to find him before anything bad happens to him. But the clues are odd. Strange. Manufactured.

Was the Stark-Rogers household as loving and happy as they claim?

Everyone's about to find out just how loving Anthony Edward Stark was with his husband, andTony is about to see how truly wicked his beloved's mind can be.

(The Gone Girl AU no one asked for pretty much)

Words: 2843, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Iron Man (Movies), Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types

Rating: Not Rated

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: M/M

Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts, James "Rhodey" Rhodes

Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark

Additional Tags: GONE GIRL AU, Lovers to enemies to lovers, not the most faithful retelling, Stony - Freeform, Characters and relationships will be added as they appear, Dark Tony Stark, Dark Steve Rogers, this'll be fun, I even promise you a happy ended

source http://archiveofourown.org/works/20887955

#stony #steve rogers #tony stark #iron man #captain america #fan fiction #ao3 stony feed #stony fan

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frustratedcastingdirector · 8 years ago

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Huffington Post Review of “The Price”

Steven Suskin, ContributorDrama critic

Aisle View: Arthur’s Price03/16/2017 08:01 pm ET

At the final curtain of Arthur Miller’s 1968 drama The Price—and I’ve seen all five Broadway productions—I’m always left thinking: this is a very good play. Something has kept it off the Miller Hit List (which consists of Death of a Salesman, The Crucible and A View from the Bridge, plus sometimes All My Sons). And every time I see The Price, I walk away wondering why.

Terry Kinney’s scintillatingly bristling revival, from the Roundabout, offers a clear answer. In 1968 at the 46th Street (where it had moved from the Morosco), I left the four-character play talking about Kate Reid (as Esther) and Davey Burns (as Solomon). In 1979 at the Playhouse, it was Fritz Weaver (as Victor, the cop). In 1992 at the Roundabout, it was Hector Elizondo (Victor) and Eli Wallach (Solomon). In 1999 at the Royale, it was Bob Dishy (Solomon). This time, it was Mark Ruffalo, giving an altogether excellent performance as Victor. And Jessica Hecht, as the finest Esther I’ve seen. AndTony Shalhoub as the most convincing Walter yet. And Danny DeVito, who is making his Broadway debut—although the man, you could say, has loads of experience—and who I suppose is equal to Burns as Solomon supreme.

This tells us a few things. First, it suggests that Miller’s play—about the familial bonds and internecine strains of brotherhood and sacrifice—is deceptively strong. (Deceptive in that we walk in knowing the play will be good, and repeatedly find it considerably better than that.) Second, it reinforces how incisive Kinney—a Steppenwolf actor, who staged the 2001 production of One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest—is as a director. While the original had first-rate direction by Ulu Grosbard, the other Broadway productions have had the feel of top-grade regional theatre.

Mostly though, it reveals the secret of The Price. Miller has given us four deep, conflicted characters. More accurately, three deep characters plus one octogenarian Jewish vaudevillian. And I mean that literally: Solomon was an acrobat who played on the same bill as Gallagher & Shean, and Miller has written him raveled like an onion, “playing the part” of the used-furniture dealer with all the schmaltz he has. Not simply the actor playing it with schmaltz, mind you; the character milks every line for a laugh, and isn’t averse to feigning a heart attack or two if it will help him lower the price (or, rather, “The Price”). Let us just say that DeVito is a marvel; if the evening weren’t as good as it is, we might recommend it simply so you can see what Danny can do with a boiled egg. (And yes, the egg is in Miller’s meticulous stage directions.)

Otherwise you have two brothers: a highly-successful surgeon and a blue-collar patrolman. Victor stayed home and took care of Pop, a casualty of the Depression, and lost any opportunities for advancement he might have had. Reason for his resentment of high-living Dr. Walter, and reason for Victor’s wife Esther to share the resentment.

But it’s not quite as simple as that. The action takes place as Solomon comes to buy the household furniture before the building is demolished: ten room’s worth of furniture stacked in the attack, where the family was forced to move after the millionaire father went bust early in the Depression and had to rent out the rest of the house. What’s the price Solomon will give them for the furniture? And what’s the price each of the other characters has paid over twenty-eight years of resentment?

Ruffalo is likable, honest and direct, more plebeian than the other Victors I have seen (although I did not see Pat Hingle, who had already left the original production before I got there). Shalhoub, the former TV actor who has demonstrated his stage-worthiness with searing performances in Golden Boy and Act One, is a marvel as the successful brother. Walter almost sheens with success, on the surface; but the actor from the first allows us to see the depths that work beneath. Shalhoub can express his character’s psychology by simply buttoning and unbuttoning his suit jacket; by play’s end, he is gnawing at his fingernails.

When Victor and Walter finally tangle, we believe it. (They grasp each other in a manner reminiscent, somehow, of the final battle between Romulus and Remus.) Esther arrives nervous, slightly drunk and in a brand-new suit (which is probably more attractive than she usually dresses); is she somehow excited by the thought of seeing her husband’s rich and successful brother? Maybe, and maybe not; Hecht plays it in such a manner that the brothers—and the audience—can’t quite tell. She is wonderful here, with her finest performance since the Liev Schreiber A View from the Bridge.

So there, it seems, is the answer to our Price question. Miller has built the play on four equal characters, giving each their space. But I’ve never seen the play with four equal performances. Mr. Kinney has taken his actors—all of whom are accomplished—and mixed them together in such a manner that the play always comes through. Not ensemble work, exactly; rather, four star turns which continually halt, making way for whomever the playwright wants the audience to concentrate on in the next exchange.

The Price was the end of the line for Miller. At least nine more full plays were produced before his death in 2005—the last to reach Broadway being Broken Glass (1994) and The Ride Down Mt. Morgan (2000)—with nary a one of them getting positive attention. Every time they did another revival of Salesman, the man was hailed as one of America’s greatest playwrights and a living treasure; do a new Miller play, no one cared. People just wanted to see Salesman,The Crucible, A View from the Bridge, and sometimes All My Sons.

This play belongs on that list. Thanks to Kinney, Ruffalo, Shalhoub, Hecht & DeVito, we have an opportunity to see just how high The Price is.

Arthur Miller’s The Price opened March 16, 2017 and runs through May 7 at the American Airlines Theatre

#the price #mark ruffalo #tony shaloub #danny devito #jessica hecht #arthur miller #terry kinney

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modcrnspirits · 10 months ago

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Alois waited patiently like a hungry slut, but he did not see it coming how rough Tony finally got. He took it with pleasure though, letting his head pull back and the spat fall right into his mouth. He barely had time to swallow it though - Tony's rough kiss followed and he kissed him back hard, his own cock hard between his legs as the boy pushed the cock closer. "I'm yours, boy. All yours. Use me as you see fit." He said in a deep, thundering voice before closing his mouth around the cockhead, tongue swirling over it.

Tony was enjoying the way Alois wanted him to dominate him. Normally it's the reserve, with the older man being dominating but seeing him be submissive was turning Tony on. A hand went through Alois's hair and yanked his head back roughly as he leaned his head down and spat down into Alois open mouth before kissing him in a forceful manner before yanking Alois's head away from his. "Your mine now, got it?" He said in a firm tone. "Say it!" He ordered not allowing the man to taste his cock just yet.

#addictiontolust #alois #andtony

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muhlenbergcollege · 5 years ago

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'What the Constitution Means to Me' closed its Broadway run last month. https://ift.tt/2lMN85o

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torentialtribute · 5 years ago

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Feud pair are ready to rumble as Rafael Nadal sets up grudge match with Nick Kyrgios

Nick Kyrgios, ready to argue again with Rafael Nadal the outsider of Aussie proves the court jester with first win to set up Wimbledon champion

Rafael Nadal Banged Yuichi Sugita during their first meeting on Court No. 1

The 32-year-old Spaniard won 6-3, 6-1, 6-3 and met Nick Kyrgios

The controversial Australian defeated the tournament in 2014

Published: 23:38 BST, 2 July 2019 | Precious little bad blood has been spilled on the lawns of the All England Club

Both men won a blockbuster second round on Tuesday to set up. With all the snipping back and forth in recent months, this is how close the tennis gets to a grudge.

& # 39; I'm not sure if I and Rafa could beat the Dog & Fox and drink a beer together & # 39 ;, Kyrgios summarized, referring to a waterhole in Wimbledon. & # 39; I get along well with people, I don't like it. We have mutual respect, but that is it. "

<img id =" i-75947a1fac0ce65a "src =" https://ift.tt/2J5gHb9 a-1_1562106977770.jpg "height =" 423 "width =" 634 "alt =" Nick Kyrgios will risk his body when he takes over his enemy Rafael Nadal "Nick Kyrgios will risk his body when he takes over his enemy Rafael Nadal takes over "

Nick Kyrgios will lay his body on the line as he meets his enemy Rafael Nadal

takes over the second round of Wimbledon "

dal thrashed Yuichi Sugita for a second round to set up a game against Kyrgios "class =" blkBorder img-share "/>

<img id =" i-232016b683bc6133 "src =" https://ift.tt/2W3ngi6 /07/02/18/15543840-7206005-image-a-1_1562088898937.jpg "height =" 441 "width =" 634 "alt =" Nadal has beaten Yuichi Sugita to start a second round match against Kyrgios "class

Nadal thrashed Yuichi Sugita to set up a second round match against Kyrgios

Kyrgios was the first to book his place in the second round after a rioting entertaining match against fellow Australian Jordan Thompson. Nadal accompanied him with a prosaic 6-3, 6-1, 6-3 thrashing of Japanese qualifier Yuichi Sugita on Court 1.

Now they will repeat their 2014 fourth round clash in which an then 19- The one year-old Kyrgios announced itself with a huge upset.

Their counterparts are at three each and the score in this year's verbal war is about even, too.

The former coach and uncle of the 33-year-old Spaniard, Toni, added that the Aussie & # 39; no education & # 39; has.

Nadal said in February that Kyrgios & # 39; lack respect for the public, the rival and himself. ]

The 32-year-old Spaniard defeated Sugita (photo) 6-3, 6-1, 6-3 on Court No 1 on Tuesday "class =" blkBorder img-share "/>

The 32-year-old Spaniard defeated Sugita (photo) 6-3, 6-1, 6-3 on Court No 1 on Tuesday "

The 24-year-old Spaniard defeated Sugita (photo) 6-3, 6-1, 6-3 on Court No 1 on Tuesday [oldrepliesthattheNadalclansonlypoorloserswereRafa'salty'andTonies'ordisgustedbyhimthesuggestionthatKyrgiosis'badfortennis'isabsurdThemanisacashierandahugeassettothesport

There were rants at the referee, the cricket shot, a thrown fourth series and an absurd number of shots between the legs and full-length dives. But there was also a wonderful service when the world No. 43 won 7-6, 3-6, 7-6, 0-6, 6-1.

Kyrgios was doing well at the start of the game, but that did not last long.

<img id = "i-678c7b0bfeddd752" src = "https://ift.tt/2RO4L06 13 / 15528058-0-image-a-1_1562069729524.jpg "height =" 423 "width =" 634 "alt =" Kyrgios won an incredible first-round match against Jordan Thompson against Jordan Thompson on Tuesday

<img id = "i-821515ec4dd8aa5b" src = "https://ift.tt/2YsyU7D /15556110-7207011-image-a-3_1562107056395.jpg "height =" 399 "width =" 634 "alt =" <img id = "i-821515ec4dd8aa5b" src = "https://ift.tt/2NyDsEw 1s / 2019/07/02/23 / 15556110-7207011-image-a-3_1562107056395.jpg "height =" 399 "width =" 634 "alt =" The Australian was bent over the net during a play passage on Tuesday.

The Australian saw himself bent over the net during a passage of the game on Tuesday & # 39; el for hundreds of th & # 39;

& # 39; I play for hundreds of th & # 39; thousands of dollars and he makes such an idiot. Wake up. & # 39;

Kyrgios won only five points in an 18-minute quartet in which he made great efforts as a Group of the Brexit Party in Strasbourg. & # 39; If a boxer drops his hands, does that mean he is not trying? & # 39; he said & # 39; It could be a tactic, right? & # 39;

Kyrgios defended his antics. & # 39; Because I am different, it causes commotion. If everyone were the same, it would be boring, wouldn't it? "

Nadal had to say cunningly to himself. & # 39; He is a very dangerous player if he wants to play tennis, & # 39; he said. & # 39; And mostly to the top players I want to play tennis. & # 39;

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#Feud pair are ready to rumble as Rafael Nadal sets up grudge match with Nick Kyrgios"

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