#andre x glenn

[datchidatchi]

Happy Valentine's Day!

Have some smootches for our favourite biochemist. 💝🧪

Instagram I Twitter

[justasfunsober]

Inside Job characters as John Mulaney quotes

Bc anytime I make a new blog I have to do this.

Reagan Ridley

Brett Hand

Andre Lee

Gigi Thompson

Magic Myc

Glenn Dolphman

[cognitosclowns]

I wanna fall asleep with these freaks 💓🥺

I am the eepiest sleepiest little guy of all time and this activated a Worm in my Brain so this is gonna get SO LONG AMSDNAMSND

sfw!! just snuggles and soft things

Reagan

Not extremely cuddly? She likes her personal space!

That doesn't mean she never wants cuddles, she's just gotta be in a particular Mood for it!

Most nights, she wants to be kinda,, gently curled into your arm?? just a loose grip around it w/ her own, cheek resting on your bicep.

She talks in her sleep, but it's very quiet. Usually it's just her going through her schedule for tmrw (does she?? dream of work in her sleep???), but occasionally, you'll hear her mumbling about how much she loves you <333

Yes, it's just as cute as it sounds. She has no memory of it in the morning, but if you bring it up, she'll get this flustered little Half-Smile alllll morning <3

She falls asleep so fast. if you wanna be cute w/ her while cozied in bed I'm so sorry, the second she feels Safe and Warm and Cozy in your vicinity she's passing out for 4-12 hours ✨✌🏻

It's alright, you know she needs her rest <3 besides, that just opens up options for you two to be soft and shmoopy in the morning

Brett

Unsurprisingly, the cuddliest guy of all time. He would be inside your ribcage if the opportunity was provided KJASDKASJD

He really likes?? laying on your chest and stomach?? he likes to be significantly further down. occasionally you'll just,, barely see his hair and the top of his forehead peaking out from the covers from how low he gets

it's just so comfy! he likes The Noises and Warmth and Vague Suffocation that comes w/ sleeping w/ his head under the covers, resting against your torso <3

He smiles so much in his sleep. you didn't think ppl did that outside of movies, but he totally does <3 usually only when he's having a particularly good dream.

OH ALSO HIS BED IS SO FUCKING COZY

I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THIS MAN DOESN'T QUILT. HE HAS SO MANY BEAUTIFUL HAND-MADE QUILTS AND BLANKETS AND KNITTED SHIT IN HIS BED. I hope you like being cozy bc you're gonna be The Coziest Of All Time.

He also sleeps with stuffed animals! He always did as a child bc his treehouse was always cold as hell, and the habit just stayed with him!

they're so well-kept and soft all these years later <3 usually he just keeps them at the foot of the bed, bc it makes him feel safe to, but occasionally he'll bring a couple up for you two to snuggle <3 You Are Never Too Old To Snuggle A Stuffed Bear Don't Like To Yourself.

Andre

A Nightmare (affectionate)

not only is his sleep schedule Entirely Batshit, but he has so much trouble falling asleep. expect lots of tossing and turning

he does settle a lot thought when you hold him!! Don't hold too close, he still needs to squirm a lot to actually fall asleep

You're also the only person that he gets a full nights sleep with <3 he usually ends up waking up in the night, his mind starts working on smth, and he doesn't go back to sleep <3 but with you, it's almost instantaneous.

A little Jump, a bit of squirming to get into a comfortable position, and then off to seeb again <3 it's nice to see just how safe he feels around you <3

Expect plenty of early morning/late night convos <3 hell even middle of the night convos, where he hasn't realised that he fell asleep and instantly hops back into Whatever He Was

He also has such a habit of. Continuing Conversations From His Dream. like he'll just grab your arm and start talking about Yes I'm Sure If We Distilled It Enough We Could Make Whiskey Out Of Lighter Fluid Myc before passing out cold MASNFASMFJ

TLDR. squirmy silly man, but also enjoyable to seeb with.

Gigi

OUGHEEEEEEEEAWBABWBAGOURGHR <- experiencing wife fevers

SO COZY HOLY SHIT

I refuse to believe she doesn't have a Big Comfy Bed. Silk covers, big thick duvet, more pillows that she knows what to do with. The bed is 3 times the size of her so when you catch her snuggled up in bed she truly just looks like those photos of Very Small Puppies in Very Large Beds MNASDMASND

So cuddly <3 you wouldn't expect it, since she makes a point of being seen as very Untouchable and Independent, but she loves to be held.

Her ideal state is nuzzled under your chin, feeling your pulse through your neck <333 a leg hooked around yours to make sure you're nice and close.

She takes a while to fall asleep, so she likes to go to bed early! Feel free to join her at any time, she'll just be dozing <3

If you do join her when she goes to bed, expect some,, very soft, lovey-dovey moments. she looks utterly adorable, all bundled up in her cozy little slightly-too-poofy nightgown and eye mask.

She Deserves 1000000 Cheek Smooches Or Else You Shall Die Of Love Disease <- her favourite part of the night. she will start giggling the moment she feels your lips on her cheeks and neck.

kisses her 1000. she's the most

Myc

HE OWNS A WATERBED I KNOW THIS FUCKING MAN OWNS A WATERBED

A FREEFLOW WATERBED TOO. NO SUPPORT IT FEELS LIKE YOU'RE FLOATING.

It's actually pretty comfortable after you get used to it. you see the appeal, it's kinda got that Sensory Deprivation Tank feeling of weightless floating <3

Expect to be utterly Mummified in tentacles AKSDJASKJ

He insists that it's so that you don't go tossing and turning in your sleep and knock his ass off the bed but. You See Through His Lies You Understand. You See The Jackassery At Play Here.

OUGHEEE he has such a habit of like. swirling his tentacles gently around your skin. Not necessarily stroking back and forth, moreso massaging? if you have any knots in your back, thighs, or arms, they're gonna be gone by morning.

Fairly quiet? That doesn't mean silent though, he absolutely talks while you two drift off to sleep, but it's all in very quiet tones. A Little Shit, But Lovingly. (you may. gently have to bop him on the head and tell him to Shut The Hell Up Its 3 Am Goddamn Not Everyone's Job Is Just Sitting Around Getting Jacked Off MANSDMASNDMANSDMN)

Glenn

He snores like a foghorn I'm so sorry. the old man of all time

If you can look past that though, he's so fucking delightful to sleep with <33 most especially bc he loves when you lay on him

he says smth about how it Helps Unfuck His Back, but you're at least 45% sure that that isn't the main reason

(and you're right, it isn't <3 he just loves feeling your weight on him)

He loves just,, leaving a hand against your back, running up and down as you settle in to sleep <33 before leaving it to rest on the small of your back <33 love is so real and true.

his tail wags in his sleep

HIS TAIL WAGS IN HIS SLEEP

HIS TAIL WAGS IN HIS SLEEP

You'll see this most when he's sleeping on his stomach, bc when he's on his back his tail can't move, and on his side Everything Hurts At All Times KAJDKASJ

You'll see it squirm around the most when you're touching him <3 if you run your hands through his hair, or trace patterns on his back that things gonna be WHIPPING like a wheatstalk in a hurricane.

^ this also applies to. early morning and late night cuddles. in the morning its more of a,, slow waggle? like you'll just see it gently twitching under the bed, while you place kisses on his cheek BAWBBABWBABW <- if I talk about his tail any more we'll never be done

just the guy of all time <3 go sleep with that old man go do it go do it now go go go go g

JR

Let Him Sleep On The Booba

Truly he sleeps best with his face buried in your chest. what can he say, it's cozy as hell.

his ideal state is being Unconscious. A Coma. Laying horizontally being fed nutrients through a tube. He will nap on you at any possible moment

It's one of the time's he feels Truly Safe? Like he's constantly having to run around doing what the Shadow Board wants, doing what Rand wants, etc. Sometimes You Just Need A Little Nap With Your Partner To Be Okay Again

He IS freezing cold I refuse to believe otherwise. he runs Ice Cold and it takes him 15 minutes to warm up. feels a bit like cuddling a corpse until your body heat brings him back to Human Levels Of Warmth.

The things we do for love smh MNSFGKFAJSFGKSDJ

stupid rich expensive bed. imported silk sheets. mathematically optimised mattress designed in a lab to give him The Best Sleep Possible. he's rich enough to buy several countries, he might as well put it to use.

Alpha-Beta

OUGHEEEEEEEEAWBABWBAGOURGHR <- experiencing wife fevers part 2

He's such a heavy sleeper MY GOD. If you couldn't hear his internal systems whirring and clicking you'd think he was dead KJDSAKFJASDKFJDSA

It isn't really his fault - his 'sleep cycle' likes to be done in one solid stretch, to avoid file corruption, which means. His body just,, won't wake him up unless it senses Active Danger to himself or you.

It's fine! He'll wake up if the house is on fire. Probably.

'aww you're such an old man <3' <- he's going to push you into a woodchipper AKSGJSAKDJFKSDFGJ

He's so warm and cozy <3

Upside, personal heater during the winter. Downside, summer is hell for both of you (Upside, he sleeps mostly naked in summer to avoid Dying of Death Disease)

Hold him <3 hold him he won't ask but he loves being held, even more than he loves holding you (which is. Saying Something). The second he feels your arms wrap around him, maybe one of your hands gently fussing with his hair? Out like a light <3 its sweet, all those unspoken ways that shows how much he loves you <3

ABWBABWBAB I swear I did an ask like this before but. I don't care this was so cute. If you have any additions, go nuts!

[rapturemctro]

The brain Rot is real, I made a relationship chart to show off Atlas's relationship with the rest of Cognito Inc.

I actually copied the little chibi designs from The Gang jacket from Season 1, and ended up trying to mimic the style to the best of my ability for Rand, JR, and Ron. I'm pretty happy with how it turned out!

I've also added a blank one under the read more for any other Inside Job Self Shippers who wants to use this, or show off their own relationships with the gang. Please tag me if you use this I wanna see!!!

[sin-sidejob]

Inside Job Text Prefs

texts to send them abandoning their work and stripping their clothes off while running to you:

JR scheimpough

— “My lunch meeting just got canceled. Also, I’m not wearing any panties.”

Andre Lee

— “want to fuck while testing your new strain?”

Brett Hand

— “I want a baby.”

Glenn Dolphman

— “anyway we can get clearance to fuck in the tank? I heard the seat’s comfy.”

Reagan Ridley

— “Filled the coffee pot. Btw, want to break in your new office, CEO?”

Gigi Thompson

— “saw you earlier while grabbing coffee. You look tired. My face is free to rest on.”

Alpha Beta Robotus

— “I’ve got a new idea for a dick modification. Also, you look good today.”

Myc Celium

— “want to see how many flagella you can put in me? I feel like breaking our record.”

Ron Staedtler

— “it’ll count as repentance if you kneel between my thighs.”

[ijafterhours]

You can't fire your own family. Can you?

It's been ten years since Reagan finally assumed control of Cognito, against all odds. Her team is finally complete, and they're training the next wave of employees for their lives under the skin of America. Success is right around the corner. However, one of these new prodigies is starting to have second thoughts, at the apex of her most crucial mission. Reagans own daughter, Lara.

You heard it here first, folks! Inside Job; After Hours 2 is finally scheduled for its release, with the first episode dropping Sunday, October 1st! I'm so incredibly excited for you to follow Lara's journey this season, and i'll be dropping bits and bobs before release as well, so stay tuned for more, and get excited! The next chapter is right around the corner!

1.10.23. Inside Job; After Hours - Season Two, Episode One: Welcome to Cognito 2.0!

[same-pic-of-venus-everyday]

[file-21674]

Gang with a S/O who has anger issues!

This is NOT!! Romanticising!! Anger issues is a serious topic that I and some of my friends deal with! Please don’t read if this is somehow a sensitive topic to you <3

Retrieving information . . .

FILE. . REAGAN . . .

Would probably understand where your coming from

If your anger is physical she would keep her eye on you 24/7

If you ever got mad at her, she would be pissed, but would calm down for the sake of not provoking you further

Fighting/arguing is okay with her, but if it ends with you getting hurt she’s yelling at you for being reckless

She would try come up with a device to control your anger, (weather it works or not is completely up to you)

Gives you advice, mainly just saying “put your anger into your work, trust me, it works more than you would think”

If your anger is more like, silent and glares, she would rub your back

She’s really awkward, when she sees you staring someone down, eye twitching and fists clutching nothing. She would. In the most awkward way. Try to calm you down.

Overall she doesn’t know what she’s doing, but she’s trying to help no matter what!

FILE . . BRETT . . .

Has no clue what to do. Like at all

If your anger is more physical he would be next to you ALL the time. Would probably drag Reagan away from her desk just so he can be with his 2 Favourite people!! And so you don’t kill MYC

If you ever got mad at him he would be like “oh..” and make the :( face, he would forgive you, of course! But he’s still going to be upset, APOLOGISE.

Fighting/arguing, he’s not a big fan of. He doesn’t want you to get hurt, but if the person your fighting is a asshole, he will watch, but be standing next to you

He would be rubbing your shoulders trying to calm you down, telling you to let it go (Elsa) and to just leave it. BUT SWEETLY

He wouldn’t give you advice, HE WOULD IF YOU ASKED, but I think he’s more of a physical comfort kinda guy rather than just using his words

If your anger is more like silent and glares, he would look at the person your glaring at worriedly

He’s nervous, scared you will lash out all your built up anger on him. So he’s not gonna try say anything that could possibly anger you, I can see him hugging you from behind while you stare at the person who made you angry

Overall he’s slightly scared of you, but always there to comfort you when you need it <3

FILE . . GIGI . . .

honestly, I see her being more encouraging than handling your anger

If your anger is physical you best know she’s recording you whenever you get in a fight. If you win she posts it on her story on Instagram, if you loose she’s giving you tips

If you ever get mad at her she’s offended. As fuck. But knows not to say anything.

Fighting/arguing she’s okay with. It’s not her business. But if it gets out of hand she’s holding you to her chest screaming at the other person

She would rub your knuckles softly, and tell you that it’s okay

She doesn’t give advice. She gives tips. On how to either distract beat or intimidate the other person

If your anger is more like silent and glares. She’s concerned. 10000% concerned

She wants you to be able to express how you feel so if your ever just sitting there tapping your fingers on the table while killing someone with your eyes. She’s begging you to atleast go talk to them to settle your anger a little

Overall she’s not good at helping, but good at encouraging!!

FILE . . ANDRE . . .

He finds it hot. :/

If your anger is physical. He’s 100% gonna pop one when your fighting/screaming at someone

If you get mad at him, he’s gonna slowly…melt in his chair and look at you…and smirk.

Fighting/arguing he’s good with. Unless it costs him his drugs or weed or you getting severely hurt

He would offer to smoke pot with you, but if it’s one of those days you chill and watch some episodes of breaking bad to calm down

He’s not good with advice, like at all so expect something shitty like “anger is like…condoms in a way!” And he’ll get distracted and start talking about condoms 💀

If your anger is more like silent and glares, he’s just gonna take it the same way,

He will make jokes to try and make you look away from the person your staring at like “Hey Y/N! Don’t you think this chicken wing kinda looks like a dick? Y/N?” Once he realised that your twitching he’ll try and drag you away, talking shit about the person you was glaring at on the way

Overall he’s eh. He can be compassionate when he needs to, but tries to lighten the mood rather than pry you away from the person

FILE . . GLENN DOLPHIN . . .

Respect you.

If your anger is physical. He’s gonna start rambling about American “MY COUNTY STANDS BY WHAT Y/N IS DOIN. LEAVE YOU…(idk)” is what he would yell to anyone trying to stop you

If you get mad at him. I can see him sucking air through his..nose? And water coming out of his blow hole..?

Fighting/arguing? Bitch he’s joining in. He’s throwing a gun at you and telling you to shoot whoever

If it gets bad, then he’s there to listen. But he is TERRIBLE. At advice

Like I said he’s terrible. But he’s trying..though if he dose give advice..give it 5 minuets and it’s a story about war

If your anger is more like silent and glares, he doesn’t care ANGER IS ANGER TO HIM

He will feel awkward after a few minuets of you just staring at someone and he’s just sitting there..next to you

Overall hes terrible..BUT HE MEANS WELL

FILE . . MYC . . .

bros the reason your mad

[ben-pincus]

Hey how are you?

May I request some angst to fluff(Reagan ridley x reader) where Reagan is badly injured and reader takes care of her and they both catch feelings?

zoo wee mama took a break from writing inside job there because I was a bit sad my sillies got cancelled but this hot chocolate is making me write again lets go!!!1

"you gotta hold still, man.." you brought the alcohol wipe to the gnash on her forehead again, surprise surprise, she flinched back.

"ow!! fuck!!" she winced.

"we could take a break? I just don't want it getting infected, is all." you sat back on the office chair, spinning it around while looking at her office.

you two had come back from a mission that failed, which resulted in reagan getting injured and you only having a few scrapes and bruises.

"just- just fucking get it over with!!" she groaned, frustrated as she felt blood trickle down her forehead again.

"shit.." you pulled down your sleeve over your knuckle, using it to wipe the blood off her forehead.

she was confused by this, why would you ruin your perfectly good top for her??

"right, it's gonna sting like shit. again. you can hold my hand if you're up to it. I know it helped me when I was younger n' getting injections n' all that shit.." you extend out your hand, your palm facing up as you waited for her to hold it.

she didnt hold it, yet.

but when you put the wipe back up to the gnash, she grasped onto your hand and squeezed for dear life.

"we're almost done, just a bit more."

you were being so gentle with her? why? she hasn't been that nice to you. she doesn't even remember talking to you that much.

"now! done!" you leaned back, taking the bandages and wrapping them around her head, cutting it off and tying it where it needed to be tied.

"you'll look like you just came out of hospital, but it's better than actually being in hospital, right?" you cracked a smile, closing the first aid box.

"uhm. yeah. yeah." she wanted to say more, thank you! would you like to go get a coffee sometimes? even though my social skills are fucking horrendous?, but her mouth remained closed.

you cleared your throat, "just, come back to me in 2 days to change the bandage. or if it rips. 'kay? I'll see ya round." you smiled at her before exiting her office.

safe to say, she definitely ripped it just so she could see you again.

"I dont like them!! sure, they make me feel like im dizzy every time I see them, and yeah, maybe I get nervous and stutter when im around them, and-"

reagan was greeted with knowing stares by the rest of the gang,

"-oh shit."

[aquatic-mycologist]

may we please have some collective headcanons for the Gang w/ a gn! reader who has six fingers on each hand (like ford pines from gravity falls) and is kinda self conscious about it? keeping their arms crossed and their hands in their pockets a lot, and handshakes are very rare

Sorry for taking so long! Hope this is to your liking, if it's not what you had in mind pls do tell and I'll give it another shot!!

Under the cut cause it got long </3

The first time they met you was probably...a bit chaotic, honestly

At first they didn't really think anything about you, you keeping your hands in your pockets all the time was a bit odd, not gonna lie, but hey they've seen weirder (like a dolphin man and a gigantic sentient mushroom, for one)

It wasn't until you HAD to file some papers that you reluctantly showed your hands as you grabbed your pen from across the table

No matter what you had expected, it certainly didn't prepare you for the instant bombarding of questions and comments

Now, I will say, NONE of them have any malice in their hearts...But that doesn't stop the experience from being highly uncomfortable

Because on one side, you had Reagan curiously studying your hand as if they were a rare animal

On the other, you had Myc making a crude joking comparison to his own six flagella

And then there was Brett, who was oh so sweetly excited and musing about how Wow he has never seen anyone like you!! and asking a million questions per minute

And before the rest joined in, you pulled your hands away and back into your pockets, which made everyone realize that Yeah that. was pretty insensitive

But after receiving a well deserved apology, you are no longer being suffocated by the attention, and they soon become so used to it that they barely think about it anymore

Honestly? It ends up being a really comfortable place for you with the way they acommodated

And they all look after you so that the experience you had with them the first time you met NEVER happens again

Meeting someone new in the office and they offer a handshake? Brett will discreetly take it himself and make the moment pass naturally

Myc may or may not read your mind often to distract you when you start getting self-conscious along with Andre, but you didn't hear that from me

Glenn shoots...the DIRTIEST death glares in the direction of anyone who stares too long at your hands or is generally being inappropiate. And having the LITERAL HEAD OF THE WEAPONRY DEPARTMENT by your side like that? Rest assured you're never bothered by other people

If you ever wanted to conceal your hands, Gigi and Reagan team up and make some discreet, comfortable and stylish gloves for you to wear, which were neatly placed on your desk at work in a box with a sweet encouraging note, half in neat cursive and half in clean and sharp writing and a few sentences scribbled out from previous attempts at wording stuff correctly

In general? They just really care about you and will do their best so you're comfortable

[jrandreal]

Intro & Masterlist

Hey, I'm Diego! Welcome to my Inside Job Blog! I'm autistic and this show has captivated me in a time of struggle. I draw, write, theorize, and generally discuss the show. For writing, I mostly do x reader headcanons.

> Asks open! {Writing requests, art requests, comments, questions, & anything else. I love having a flooded inbox.}

Theory Masterlist:

Ridley Diploma

Dietrich Kluge

Robe-O-Reagan

Writing Masterlist:

The gang (Everyone):

The gang realizing they have a crush on you

Rand:

Autistic reader immune to his abrasiveness

My art tag

My theory tag

My writing tag

[orngejunkie]

I FINALLY MADE AN INSIDE JOB OC!!! :D

her name is Billie Burnhand, her pronouns are she/her and she is pansexual

she has been dating Brett Hand for about 1 year now

her birthday is September 24, 1993

(this oc is based in 2022 where Brett is 30 and Billie is 29 :3)

she is the head of the animation department of Cognito inc

she hangs out with The Gang™️ a lot, but when she’s not with them, she’s in her office animating, character designing, or reviewing what the other animators made and editing it slightly (with their permission of course)

her parents divorced when she was 10, she tells herself that it didn’t affect her that much, but she has abandonment and commitment issues that she doesn’t know about (she shows signs of them, but doubts that she actually has those issues.)

her best friend is Reagan, but she also talks to Gigi and Andre about pop culture moments

Glenn, Myk, and Rand make her uncomfortable

she’s not close with J.r

yippee!!! i love having an OC for this show cause now i can draw her and brett so much i’m actually going. crazy hooray!!!!

[your-mums-nuts]

Annual reminder post to send me anything inside job related requests I am ALWAYS ready to make content, don’t be a gross creep tho. I’m fine with any and all ships except the gross ones.

I do fanart, fanfics, edits and just generally headcanons in my head constantly

[rapturemctro]

Okay so I finally finished Season 1 of Inside Jobs, I was literally on episode 8 last week and ended up restarting it cause my husband wanted to watch it with me, but I am absolutely dying at the fact that both Andre and Glenn know what furries are! Do you think Andre has a Fursona?? Do you think Glenn’s been mistaken for a Fursuiter before in the past and that’s how he knows about them? I’m so curious, but honestly that line was so good!!

[sin-sidejob]

Inside Job + Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentines Day!! I tried to at least write a little something for the holiday since I’ve got a bit of a tradition going

Warnings: NSFW + MINORS DNI mentions of sex, vague and genderless, safe for all genders. Mentions of food and eating. Monsterfucking? Misuse of candy + absolutely gratuitous cum play and cum eating. I mean it. I wanna say machine fucking for Robotus due to that one line, “you’re about to fuck a machine!”, I love that line lmao — anyways, enjoy!

JR Scheimpough:

- he’s absolutely taking you out to an overly expensive restaurant, there may or may not be chocolate involved that you’re allergic to. He tries to go above the expectations of above and beyond, black card on fire from the amount of times he’s swiped it.

- I can see that kind of conversation where he needs to be told he doesn’t need to do so much, y’know? Something of a sweeter, softer ending with you telling him that he doesn’t need to go all out, all you want is him (plus: “so you don’t want the jewelry?” “I never said that.”)

- then just Valentine’s Day fucking where you may or may not be decked out to the nines in heart jewelry or something lacy beneath whatever red or pink outfit you’ve got on, littered with hearts in your attempts to steal his. JR’s too oblivious to realize that it’s been yours all this time.

- you’ve got him beneath you in his obscenely large bed in those custom 3k thread count Egyptian cotton sheets, and he’s drained and blabbering and essentially orating his last will and testimony as you urge another after another orgasm out of him, poor little thing, empty after giving you everything to feel full. what a gift he is.

- the night ends sticky and sweaty, coated in that salty, glimmering sheen of a fresh fuck. His glasses are askew if not abandoned completely and he’s out of breath, staring at the ceiling and grinning like a fool as you curl around him, pulling up the blankets and sheets around you both and nestling up against him. JR needed the reminder of how it’s the little things that matter, not the grander gestures. He gets it when he feels your breathy little goodnight kiss against his shoulder right before you fall asleep. He gets it.

Alpha Beta Robotus:

- i can see AB’s attempts to do the cliche things he’s seen from sitcoms and realizes through personal error that it just doesn’t work — both for him being the one orchestrating things and then just shitty hijinks of things not working out

- like baking and he only realizes afterward that his hands aren’t calibrated enough for the delicate art of piping. Or when he tries to order you flowers and they don’t arrive or they’re the wrong ones, unfortunately the kind you’re allergic to. He spends too long picking out the stamens to make sure there’s no pollen that could make you ill.

- you think it’s sweet and you didn’t want or need much from him, and you’re just happy that he tried. He made an effort, and you reward him for it, showing him with your mouth wrapped around him how gestures truly speak louder than gifts, especially as you swallow him down between your thighs.

- I can see this being early in the relationship too but fuck he’s just overwhelmed and out of sorts, taking his hand and placing it where your jaw meets neck and guiding you to take him further, spouting sentences of praise in the holiday spirit littered in debauched terms to describe how he feels, how you make him feel, and how he plans to return the favor.

- he shuts up though, right about a minute or two in, after you roll his balls between your palm and gently tug and the robot man is flooding your mouth until it coats your tongue and trickles past your lips to drip down your chin and land atop your chest. He needs to learn how you’re supposed to take those valentines cliches tongue in cheek, but you supposed something between your will do for now.

Brett Hand:

- goes all out with a homemade meal then dancing but in the comfort of home, spinning you around barefoot in the grass of your backyard as the radio plays something sweet and soft

- you’re soft and warm in the moment, well fed and well loved, and you let him twirl you back into his arms underneath those fairy lights you both hung up last autumn. It’s tender and sweet and you taste it on his lips like the promise of next autumn, and the seasons to follow, threading your hand in his hair to bring him close.

- you take lead from him, no longer following, urging him back through kisses that turn wet and messy, getting him to sit atop the outside dining table as you stand between his legs and make a mess out of him. You smirk against plush, swollen lips as he whines once you palm him through those precious Simply Southern khakis with the heart embroidery, sweet man, so precious for you.

- he even moans sweet, Brett’s mouth gaping as you pump him in your fist, layering thick all those compliments you always seem to have stocked away. He cums soon, quickly, but you pay it no mind, licking your hand clean from where he’s painted it white and sticky. He carries you into the house and barely makes it to the kitchen before bending you over, knocking over the festive heart garland over the doorway as he goes, and he laughs loud at your shitty joke about how he’ll always be a heartbreaker.

Reagan Ridley:

- she’s fallen trap to your bargaining and lovely eyes once more, but this Valentine’s Day she’s in a theater watching a shitty but kinda’ good movie, popcorn rich with artificial butter, giant sodas, and sidled beside you in one of those luxe movie theaters with the larger seats.

- you press kisses to her shoulder and cheek between scenes of the movie, occupying yourself with thanking her for the outing and having fun, even though it wasn’t her idea. It’s better than being home, and hey, she still gets to wear sweats.

- her interest gets piqued though when you start rubbing at her thigh when a scene gets busy, your eyes trained on the screen as your hands busy themselves with toying with her, pulling that drawstring bow undone and sneaking your warm, smooth palm beneath to linger over the warm cotton, gently pushing to the side her panties to slide through the slick pooling at her cunt.

- Reagan’s legs widen and part in efforts to get more of your touch, her hands white-knuckling both armrests. You shush her whines and little halfhearted comments with pretty kisses, the shadows making you both seem like a cute couple, your jacket covering her lap and allowing you all the privacy in the world to go knuckle-deep and curl into her cunt, swallowing her moan with a sweet smirk. She can taste the candy on your tongue too, tart and sour and sweet in the way you make everything sweeter.

- it doesn’t take long and the action scenes from the movie and the laughing audience scattered about cover her moans and how she gushes around your hand, soaking her panties and the inner lining of her sweats. You kiss her through it and work her down until you can slide your fingers out and suck them clean, getting back to the movie and finally grabbing some popcorn, hands still sticky-sweet and glinting with that spit shine in the light reflection. Yeah, Reagan can’t say she’s having a bad Valentine’s Day at all.

Andre Lee:

- it initially starts with making those silly tissue box - valentines boxes and shitty cards and filling each other's up at work with silly little dollar store cards with cheap candy attached. Soon, as the day progresses, and every time you stop by his office or send anyone his way, he finds better cards that get bigger and bigger, some with gift cards for date activities or little homemade coupons.

-he was mid-conversation with Myc as he flitted through the coupon book and spotted the more sexual ones, seeing how they got more filthy the further the flipbook went on, prompting him to ditch the dollar store heart sunglasses and stare openly and swat away Myc as he tried to peek.

-due to the fact he already finished his work — which was a lie — he hurried over to your office and shut the door, locking it promptly as he neared and sidled between the desk and your chair, standing between your legs. "I'd like to redeem this little coupon here, hm?" he smiles, giggling light as you take it and look it over, smirking at the words and which one he chose.

-"Alright then, strip for me, and let's get to it," you murmur, already unbuttoning your shirt and watching as he undid his own after eagerly tossing off his labcoat and shucking off his crocs. Andre stands in just his cartoony heart print boxers between your thighs and watches as you strip slow but reveal inch by inch of what you wear beneath, and you get to watch as well as he grows hard against the seam of his boxers.

-"C'mon then," you murmur, "I won't bite," you trail a hand through the sparse hair over his lower belly where it peeks out just above where his dick is, smirking devilishly as you watch him tremble, rocking back on his heels, rewarded as your fingers lower the waistband and take him in hand, pumping slow, "but I think its in the holiday spirit to be adoring, and I know how well you love the bite."

Gigi Thompson:

- the day goes by fast, having spent it out the entire day from brunch to dinner, shopping throughout and by the time you get home you are both exhausted yet just absolutely aching to strip and go at it, having teased one another throughout the events of the day. Shopping bags from boutiques and department stores linger in the hallway, abandoned along with the trail of clothes that leads upstairs and t your shared bedroom.

-you have her wait as you get ready, kissing her in lingering, longing pecks that are laced in reluctance as you pull away before heading to the bathroom for a moment, and she takes the opportunity to strip and splay herself across the pillows in strappy, tight magenta lingerie, semi-sheer in some places, cut out in others, exposing a lot yet bound and wrapped like a present just for you, a heart pendant centered between her breasts with your initial carved into the back, close to her heart.

-you return, in your underwear as well, and take a moment to marvel at her risque ensemble before revealing the toy hidden behind your back, that little rose number you saw she had been eyeing, and you let her know that you were intent on comparing how the toy does to your mouth. Before that even commences, you inch forward upon the bed and press your thigh between the apex of hers, knocking against her cunt and you watch her keenly as her pussy throbs against soaked cotton.

-you watch with eager yet lazy eyes as she grinds against your thigh, breezing through a soft sigh as you shift it, hands smoothing across her nylon-covered thighs to toy with the hem of her underwear, thumbing her clit through the fabric as you urge her closer. "There we go, look so pretty Gigi, pretty angel," you mutter as you watch her pant, grinding desperately against your thigh and wriggling as you flexed and twitched it. "Keep going, gotta' earn your surprise baby, make it a Happy Valentine's Day."

Myc Celium:

- there’s an annual tradition you and Myc have where you try to make it through a rom-com or shitty valentines movie without getting bored and fucking.

- this time it goes awry because the rules were never about getting horny because of the movie and holding off on fucking one another. You started squirming in your seat first at a line the love interest said, or more accurately, ground out. It sounded rough and deep, harsh and mean in just the way you like it. Myc could practically smell it on you before he noticed it — well, in his way.

- you both try and occupy yourselves in the sake of competition with snacking or talking shit about the movie, but every once in a while that love interest would say something similar to how Myc would phrase words, form them into those digging, deep comments that get you clenching and sweaty. In an effort to distract yourself, you consume an entire bowl of chewy fruity candy.

-you both eventually give up, and you're quickly sprawled across his lap with him pumping loads down your throat, hands jacking him off as you ride another flagella, staining pretty pink underwear thoroughly but you pay it no mind, focusing on how even his orb is in the festive mood, pinks littered throughout, and it turns nearly fuchsia as he cums with a shout of your name, nearly whimpering as you hollow your cheeks as you suck him clean, still riding and chasing a slow-build high.

- last coherent thing the bastard says after recovering and pulling his spent appendages from your wanton mouth is something along the lines of “happy Valentine’s Day to me, you little tart” as he places candy hearts atop your cum-coated tongue, chuckling to himself as he watches you swallow down the little pure candies down with something so dirty.

Glenn Dolphman:

-he managed to get everything done in time, prepping after work for something intimate at home, doing the grocery runs and the preliminary work ahead of time to make sure it was great.

-Glenn's not great at the whole public scene and he more than makes up for it in how he tries to do right by you, making an effort where it counts. He's got your favorite foods and snacks available and the weekend is cleared, his kids are away with their mother for the weekend so there isn't any worry or concern about being quiet and private.

-you arrive a bit early, not by much, and you know how he loves punctuality. You didn't expect to walk into his home after unlocking the gratuitous amount of locks on the door to come across him, sleeves rolled and dolled up in an apron, to be cooking over the stone and looking so good doing it.

-He notes your approach and before he can comment, you do, murmuring something along the lines of skipping dinner and going straight into dessert as you snare your arms around his abdomen, leaning up to press a kiss to his cheek. Glenn blushes something along the lines of how he worked so hard and you nearly drop to your knees right there and then to pay homage to his efforts.

-instead, you save it for later, helping him cook and moving about the kitchen, getting shooed out when he catches you doing anything, being sweet, and you don't complain, the seat at the countertop allowing you to watch him move around. At some point, after everything had been cooked and set to a low or gentle, warm temperature, he finally gives into those little tempting comments you muttered out as he moves about, the last one about his forearms making him literally drop the spoon he was holding into the sink with a clatter before he rounds around and starts undoing the ties of the apron. "Get over 'here and bend over darlin'. I'll give you your dessert."

[ijafterhours]

"You can't run from your problems forever."

Convinced she can turn pain into action, Lara hatches a plan.

Thank you for being patient with me during my short hiatus! Welcome to the final arc of After Hours!