#andor a personal attack

[arofundy]

who is making these recommendations and can you explain why these specific ratios. also are you certain the dog is getting everything it needs from this diet. are you 150% certain that your animal is not missing anything that they need to thrive and be healthy. sure your dog can survive with a homemade diet but like. are you 150% certain that they are healthy and getting everything they need / that it isn't making anything worse. WSAVA guidelines and pet food testing exist for a reason. and raw food (and any brand saying they ship raw food to your door) is completely untested. your pet is the test case

[blackstarising]

bodies was really like going to target in the best way possible i went in for one babygirl and left with 15 omg

[cadwhatalad]

Thinking about Andor and violence, and the way the show remains constantly aware of the aggressor/aggressed relationship in every interaction between the empire and the rebels; both in terms of the way in which the rebels’ violence towards the empire is expressed in moments of combat, and the way the empire is shown to be constantly exercising their aggression outside moments of combat.

Luthen invokes it his first conversation with Cassian – “the way they laugh, the way they push to a crowd. That voice telling you to stop, to go, to move.” He doesn’t talk away they torture or kill, he talks about the way they manage people, and how that management is achieved through a constant press of mild but unrelenting violence. Then it’s shown, like the TIE fighters on Aldhani. The way they just blast through the mountains, the size of them against the characters in the foreground. The pilot who flies over them when they’re preparing for the heist has no reason to think they’re anything other than shepherds, but he still flies as close and fast over their heads as he possibly can because he’s noticed them and wants them to know it. He doesn’t shoot, probably isn’t allowed if the garrison wants to maintain its veneer of civility. But he’s noticed them, so now he has to let them know that he could hurt them. Just flies overhead. If he happens to clip someone? If one of them gets caught in the wake turbulence and thrown into a tree? Not like he’d ever know or care. He doesn’t need to, as long as they know. Can’t let them forget that they’re only alive at the empire’s mercy.

Or in the prison, the way the guards never shut the fuck up when moving prisoners around – it’s a constant poke-poke of stop, go, stop, move, stand there, walk, stop. The very first introduction to the prison we’re given, when the head guard makes this big flex of “how can it be we can stand here without guns, just wait til I show you” so he can demonstrate the floors - it’s a show of confidence that’s proven almost immediately to be bullshit, because the guards are incapable of interacting with the prisoners without constantly grabbing them, hefting their giant tasers, shouting and pushing because they’re terrified that if they stop for half a second the prisoner might feel like a person again, and that alone would be enough to pose a threat.

Meanwhile, the violence of the rebels is shown as an exact inverse. It’s a subtle thing – often they’re active aggressors right back, often they throw the first punch or fire the first shot, but they’re almost always in some kind of vulnerable position when they do so. In the very first fight, Cassian doesn’t square off. He tells the guards about the credits in his pocket so they’ll come close, stays passive until they’re in headbutting range, and then he attacks. When the prisoners are preparing the breakout, they stay on program until the last possible moment, weapons hidden behind their backs as they comply. When Cinta stabs the ISB agent, she manages it because she backs up into an enclosed space and lets him corner her there. He never once considers that he’s not in control of the situation. His hands are down by his sides as he looms over her, and he doesn’t think to check where hers are until the knife’s already in his gut.

To me it’s a stunning textual representation of Nemik’s statement that tyranny requires constant effort. Think about Syril entering a random house during his manhunt and shooting at the first thing that moves, looking stone-cold terrified even through he’s the one with the big gun and the warrant, versus Cassian and Luthen escaping in the same episode by setting off a decoy first, allowing pretence of rolling over without a fight so they can slip away unimpeded. Think of the way the riot sparks off; not as soon as Maarva’s recording ends, not when the cop makes a paltry attempt at cutting off the transmission with his jacket, but when he gives up on nonviolence after that attempt fails and just kicks over the whole droid, even though he probably knows it’ll be the thing to blow the keg. He’s culturally incapable of doing anything else. Think of Wilmon, bringing a bomb to the riot that only works as well as it does because the empire showed up with crates on crates of grenades and then left them just sitting out in the street.

Wherever the rebels succeed, it’s where the empire fails to check what’s under the hammer before they swing. They rely on a constant wall of aggression and never bother to check the cracks in the foundation. Cassian says so – why would the prison guards bother spying on the prisoners when all they have to do is turn the floors on twice a day? Why would the garrison defend against an attack when they’re so sure no one’s stupid enough to try? Hell, fucking Dedra says so, spends the first half of the season clanging the alarm bell waiting for the rest of the ISB to catch on to what she’s already noticed.

The show never pretends that the empire’s violence isn’t overwhelming and devastating and almost inescapable, but what it does do is show the utility of taking moment to breathe. Plant your feet. Wait for your moment to strike. You don’t need to rely on lucky shots if you’re smart about where you aim.

Idk I just think it’s neat.

[exhausted-archivist]

In regard to my last reblog, I kinda want to expand on it.

The novels are 100% optional flavour text. They aren't required for you to really understand what is happening in the world. With the exception of Asunder, that one for me is a bit of a grey area but that is only because it covers aspects of two companions (Cole and Vivienne) that are glossed over and is rehashed entirely in an aspect by another companion's personal quest (Cassandra's).

Not even World of Thedas, the lore books are required because a big chunk of them are put in the game as codices. And the character stuff that's not? That's also flavour text and the fact that Leliana doesn't share background reports on your companions or you can't find them is a missed opportunity in utilizing Leliana. The whole "Game" aspect of Orlesian politics could have also been better incorporated through Josephine and Vivienne.

This is long so... cut.

But TLDR: Nothing is mandatory. World of Thedas, Asunder, and Masked Empire are just under utilized flavour text. They better not do the same or worse with Tevinter Nights.

We know they cut Cole from having Evangelina and Rhys appear for his personal quest and instead we got that weird thing with Varric and Solas being disagreeing dads on nature vs nurture. Rhys and Evangeline, but more so Rhys, are so important to Cole's background that I feel they could have brought them on with a little codex or preamble and it would have worked fine. They could have touched more on Cole's fear of becoming a demon again, his sense of identity and self, and even explored his whole concept of "helping" and his unique brand of compassion - because really Cole's form of compassion is a little off the beaten path.

But, that isn't because Asunder is mandatory, but because Cole isn't well anchored to begin with. They don't really explore him as a spirit/demon, they mostly use him as a way to tell you about other characters, and he's really wishy washy on even establishing what happened at the White Spire or with Seeker Lambert and just gives these sort of teasing/tantalizing starting points.

Which leads into a weak point with Vivienne. She has issue with how the war started. She has issue with the vote. She has issue with everything that happened with the White Spire. Which again, isn't explored and is just flippantly mentioned in banter with Cole or when she's snarking at Fiona.

We know she has issue with the vote because it was made when everyone was already dealing with Circles falling and templars killing people and extremist mages were killing other mages that opposed them. The vote was made not by people who were elected by the Circles - not entirely. They were made by whoever happened to get to Andoral's Reach and it was very much an emergency vote. She wasn't there for the vote and that's the start of the issue for her. Which, understandably this was written before Vivienne even existed, but with that they never resolve why she wasn't there for the vote or even aware of the chaos of the Circles. You kind of guess it's because of Bastien's health but yeah not really clear.

Both Cole and Vivienne's stories would be better anchored as well as give the Mage Templar war and the factions with in it more nuance if they even tried to incorporate the cliff notes of Asunder. It would also make it more of a flavour text and less of this murky grey area.

Which to make it even more murky and grey, Cassandra's whole plot of discovering the reversal to tranquility? Yeah that was discovered by a tranquil mage at the request of Divine Justinia. Literally every circle mage and Chantry person (of a certain rank) knows of its existence. Which they cheekily hide in ambient dialogue between Mother Giselle and another cameo character from Cassandra's past, Avexis. An elven mage who was turned tranquil because of the danger from her abilities to not only control small creatures but dragons.

That story Cassandra is known for? The dragons attacking the Grand Cathedral? Avexis was involved with that. Whole big thing in Dawn of the Seeker. But I digress.

Mother Giselle and Avexis talk about the reversal to tranquility in Haven. Everyone already knows but Cassandra's personal quest misleads you cause she's so pikachu-faced about discovering that there was a reversal and the Seeker's knew about it. Only half of the information should be new to her, the rest everyone knew about for a year and could have been beautifully folded into her story as to not only her mixed feelings on how she didn't feel as close to Justinia as Leliana was - because Leliana was in on it and Cassandra wasn't even aware that the Divine requested this happen behind the Seeker's back in 9:35 Dragon.

It would have been a great point to fold into the story to not only give more context to Cassandra questioning the Order but also feeling out of control and lost. Honesty would have been a good point in tension for her and Leliana to have.

But instead Cole goes largely explained, Vivienne is under explored and barely connected to the Mage Templar War conflict, and Cassandra is a (in my opinion) much less interesting rehash of something most people connected to the Chantry and Circles already knew for the most part.

Asunder is less required reading and more of discarded world building that amounts to a lot of missed opportunities.

Something I think that Tevinter Nights is at risk of if not worse. Either under utilized world building or they go full tilt in the wrong direction and it becomes the first required reading.

Specifically reading, because the first required additional media is the Legacy DLC of which they yoinked Corypheus and the whole start of the red templars from. And then again with Tresspasser which establishes and reveals so much vital information for the next game. Both DLCs, I think should have/be updated to free. Especially since it's been so long and they are required for the story now. And any "well players had to pay for them previously" is bs because new players can get the whole trilogy on sale for like 15USD. Deluxe editions included so they come with the DLCs - except for DA2.

Asunder and DLCs aside, lemme now circle back to the whole World of Thedas/Leliana and co thing.

The thing that grinds my gears about the World of Thedas bits is that a large part of them... are written to Leliana as reports. In game Leliana talks about doing background checks - how she isn't thorough enough with Solas because there wasn't enough time and more pressing things were coming. He slipped through the cracks. But everyone else? She got dirt on. Sera included. Leliana could have been a great vector to not only divulge more flavour text lore of our companions, but it could have also given us more aspects of conversation. How do they feel knowing Leliana gave us reports? Is sera annoyed because of the questions you can now ask? Is Blackwall sweaty because you might know details he doesn't? Does Iron Bull want to compare notes and see how good Leliana's network is?

There was so much they could have done with Leliana to not only make her more involved but made us more involved with the characters. It would have lead to more interactive story telling and folded in making the meta knowledge less meta as our Inquisitor actually used the resources of our spymaster.

Still, not required reading, but a way to fold in all the world building you've done to make the characters feel more real and give us a chance to bond with them. Even if we can't talk to them about it because "leaving it open ended for headcanons".

This also goes into how "The Game" is under utilized in Inquisition. So much of Inquisition is telling vs showing us or letting us experience something. Having more scenes where we walk in on Josephine dealing with combative knowledge, using our origins and background perks to play the game introduces us to the concept of Orlesian politics and perhaps we get perks - more soldiers, resources, gold, higher starting approval at the Winter Palace. Something that has more relevance to us and folds in this supposed system all of Orlais is beholden to.

A similar system could have also been used with Vivienne. Whether she was hosting nobles or if she wanted to gossip with you over a letter she received that she thinks could be of use to you if you know how to properly use The Game. It would have also been interesting if it impacted the noble npcs hanging out in the hall, if it became weighted depending on just how good you were. Less Orlesians meaning less support from Orlais and more reliance on other nations to legitimize the Inquisition. More Orlesians? A stronger army, more standing with the court and the Chantry, more ammunition for when you're dealing with Celene and Gaspard in the Winter Palace. Things like that. Simple story threads that didn't really need to go anywhere but perhaps impacted the ambient state.

It would have helped tie in Masked Empire and give it more weight (and also make Michel de Chevin be more than the rando the Imshael maybe killed).

Just saying... It's just under utilized world building in an interactive media.

[ireallyamabear]

Aldhani heist modern AU for Andor Appreciation Week 2023 - Day 3: Favourite Arcs ##

(Coruscant/Aldhani Valley) Vel Sartha, society girl, implicated in last year’s Aldhani Bank heist

Leaked documents from the Security Bureau allege collaboration of political and criminal elements on a not yet seen scale.

An investigation into the claims of Security Bureau agent Lt. Dedra Meero, who assembled the leaked file using confidential security documents, has been started. Experts doubt the validity of her claim that a yet unnamed leader, code name “Axis”, orchestrated the attack - in which eight bank employees and security officers lost their lives - with the goal to raise funds to establish a broad revolutionary alliance.

The investigation into the heist, in which over 12 tons of gold and an unknown amount of legal tender was stolen, has notoriously been kept under wraps, with no official suspect being named by Aldhani Valley Police as of yet. A political dimension had not been part of the conversation about the motive for the heist up until the leak. Some of the file was assembled from confidential sources, including a politically highly incendiary illegal missive by the SB about Sarthas’s cousin, Senator Mon Mothma. Parts of the document seem to come from redacted files and sources, with no explanation how Meero has obtained these. According to inside sources, intra- and interorganizational security leaks in the Bureau are already being investigated. The document claiming to identify the perpetrators and their motive was leaked online by a yet unnamed person, going by “A friend of Lt. Meero”, who claims to “not longer be able to sit idly by while a good officer who knows the truth gets no recognition for her work”. Meero’s lawyers maintain that she herself has not broken confidentiality and did not leak the document herself. Whoever leaked the documents faces charges for disseminating confidential SB information. The file also names Karis Nemik, founding member of the Alliance of Socialist Students (ASS) and a former officer of the Imperial Army, identified only as Lt. Gorn as co-conspirateurs. Also named are Cinta Kaz and Taramyn Barcona, two veterans of private security outfits that have served in multiple military tours overseas, as well as two more men, Cassian Andor and Arvel Skeen, who have minor criminal records. There are no current criminal investigations into any of the seven suspects. Besides Sartha, none of the accused have been present in the public or on social media in the last year. Unsourced rumors that at least the accused Lt. Gorn was actually one of the bodies found at the scene have yet to be confirmed.

Meero draws alleged connections between the suspects foremost through photographic evidence. Most of this evidence is already under scrutiny by officials and a vocal crowd online, with claims of image manipulation already going viral.

Various civil rights attorneys and organizations have already spoken up about the political dimension in the accusations against Sartha - especially because of her connections to the current senate - and Nemik, who has been an outspoken political activist in recent years. 

Members of the Mothma Senatorial office and Vel Sartha’s PR team have yet to comment.

Meanwhile, Sartha shared a cryptic post with the caption “Throwback to last year - I had been camping all spring!” on her various social medias.

## @andorappreciation

[dice-wizard]

So I have a pretty basic question

what’s the benefit of a dice pool rpg system over just rolling a d100 or something?

Okay so, a single die (but also d% even though this is rolled as two dice) has a flat distribution. There is an equal chance of all results on the die. When you roll a d20 your odds of a 1 are the same as the odds of a 20. The d20 was intentionally used for attacks in D&D because of the swinginess of that probability.

When you use a dice pool, it creates a bell curve instead, broadening and stabilizing your results. This is why PbtA is built around the 7-9 mixed success result - this will happen with much more stable frequency than rolling 10+ on 1d20. Similarly, Exalted uses pool math that allows the player to estimate every 2 dice generating one success, around which all the base difficulties are structured. When you start fucking with things like ones taking away in classic World of Darkness, you destabilize the nice curve and get into bad swinginess again.

The smaller your single die, the tighter (andore difficult) the framework for where you can adjudicate failure. My butthole clenches when I see people using single d6 resolution and have failure on 3 or less.

I don't really think people understand the importance of mathematical stability underpinning your basic resolution, if you're going to do something with randomization at all.

When someone says "We'll just roll a d20" I ask, is it because you want that level of swinginess? Usually no. Usually the answer is because that's what that person is familiar with - which fuels some of my distaste for WotC's stranglehold on the ttrpg zeitgeist.

Anyway, the difference is all in the control you want to have over success, failure, and your system's ability to predict and adjudicate that.

[butterflydm]

wot rewatch (book spoilers edition): 2x3

And here are my additional thoughts that contain spoilers through all the teasers and the books through book 13: A Memory of Light.

I was watching show-only reviews to try to figure out if it's safe to call Ishy 'Ishamael' yet but reaction seems mixed on whether or not Moiraine's words clued people in on the situation, so I'm going to stay ambiguous about him in my book spoiler-free posts for now.

I loved the changes that the show made to all Nynaeve's tests. They all make sense in context of the show and Nynaeve's character, they all tell us something about her, and there's also some great connective threads between them. We've known for a while (or guessed) that her first test would take place when she was a kid because her mom appeared in the casting lists... quite a few months ago. Ages ago. But I definitely prefer this one to the book version. It was so heartrending and touching.

2. The crimsonthorn strand throughout the tests is very interesting to me. I talked about this in the other post, but on a more spoilerly note, I like that the show is not defaulting to "all the Wondergirls feel a draw towards Green because They Like Men" and that Nynaeve is actually getting tugged between Yellow and Red in these last two episodes, as Liandrin tries to influence her. It makes me wonder if maybe they'll have Elayne incline towards maybe Brown ("I like to tinker with things") instead of Green. Though Nynaeve did put Egwene in the Green Ajah in her personal AU (which did such a good job in only using elements that Nynaeve was aware of when she went into the arches! No Elayne in Nynaeve's AU; and no Rand because she believes him to be dead).

4. Side note: thrilled that Nynaeve does not have to be naked for the test. The amount of times that women have to strip down for rituals in the books gets pretty ridiculous (especially when men doing the same kind of ritual -- ex. going to Rhuidean -- does not require them to strip). Stripping down to her shift makes the point well enough.

5. A thought I had about the people attacking the Two Rivers -- could this have been happening during the Andoran Succession Crisis that led to Morgase being Queen? And so the Queen's Guard, instead of keeping the roads clear of bandits, were busy with the civil war among the nobility, which let bandits get even as far as the Mountains of Mist. That could actually serve as a really good reason for the Two Rivers to basically nope out of being part of Andor -- "you were so busy squabbling amongst yourself that you let bandits rove the lands and kill innocent people". I'm not certain if the timeline matches up, but I will put it out there as a theory.

6. Her second test is based on the same worries that she had in the books -- that she's abandoned the Two Rivers and she won't be there when they need her and someone who isn't a good Wisdom will have taken over for her -- but shifted the details to hit harder in the show version, and to use characters that the show viewers are already familiar with. It really worked for me. I also liked them essentially using Perrin's lies about Rand to Tam in the books for Nynaeve here instead, where it makes a lot more sense -- she doesn't want to steal the only comfort that she can give a dying man by telling him that his son is dead.

7. Liandrin genuinely got herself invested in Nynaeve! I liked seeing that. I really like that the show is giving more emotional depth to our Darkfriends. Both Sheriam and Liandrin come across as very genuinely upset that Nynaeve hasn't returned through the arches. Because they both think of themselves as the good guys! Liandrin's motives in the show seems to be along the lines of "You need to have power so that others can't have power over you" while Sheriam's in the books were about being Black Ajah essentially to get ahead in the Tower but never expecting that she would actually need to do anything TOO terribly bad in exchange. Neither of them wanted Nynaeve to die or get hurt (they were both probably hoping to turn her to the Black Ajah). It's also really funny that it's entirely possible that they do not know that the other one is also Black Ajah.

8. Theory: being able to sense latent channelers may be a Talent rather than something either everyone or no one can do. Because it's one specific damane who comes out to point out the individual women to get dragged off to be damane, rather than it being the two women who were used to attack the village.

They are hitting the dehumanization angle hard. Egwene's 'training' is going to be so hard to watch.

9. Ishamael doesn't seem like he was expecting to find Perrin here, so I don't think Ingtar has been in regular contact with him. I really do wonder where exactly the Darkfriend social happened, timeline-wise, to the rest of the season thus far.

10. Ah, goodbye, Uno. I'll miss you, but you went out like a boss. Given the changes that were made to the plot, this does make a ton of sense -- Uno is not a man who backs down easily and he's also not a plot-relevant character really... ever, at any point. He's a fun character for flavor but someone who can be sacrificed to illustrate a narrative point without needing to change any of the story in the future.

11. Changing Logain to being able to see men who can channel as opposed to ta'veren makes a lot of sense on a practical level -- Mat was sitting right next to Rand, so if he saw ta'veren, then he would have seen both of them glowing; making it about Rand being a channeling focuses Logain's attention and memory in on Rand specifically.

12. Rand being kept out of the knowledge loop here kinda cracks me up because "Rand is on an information diet" is something that kept coming up in the books and it frustrated me so much because, in the books, it was consistently a result of his allies just never being willing to tell him a fucking thing ever unless he bullied them into it or spied on them. It makes a lot more sense here that he doesn't know what's going on with anyone else's plotlines! Taking something frustrating from the books and making it make sense is a really good habit that the show has been doing.

13. Lanfear continues to be the funniest girl in the world. She is just on cloud nine so far in s2, cruising along living her best life. Also, we see that her inn cheekily has her personal symbols as their sign.

14. Given how much Rand is experiencing the class divide in Cairhien and how much he's seen the poor get mistreated and looked down on by the rich and titled, I almost wonder if he isn't going to get a bit of Mat's arc from the books when he finds out that Elayne is a noble and needs to realize that she's not like the Cairhienin nobles.

15. Mat escaping from one abusive situation only to land right into another one definitely reminds me of the Tylin->Tuon pipeline in the books, of course. The main difference being is that we're dealing with mother figures in the show and not 'romances' (please take that word with a very large grain of salt). Possibly the biggest way that they can set Mat x Tuon up for success is actually showing us her relationship with her mother and how toxic and cruel the environment that she grew up in is. I feel like not killing off the old Empress at all and instead having Tuon take over a faction of the people and split off them off from the Empire would give us a sense that she really IS Not Like The Other Seanchan, instead of just wanting people to believe Mat when he says it despite there being no evidence in Tuon's actual behavior (I'm trying to remember who originally suggested that idea, but it was a while ago, so I have forgotten; I'm sorry!).

16. Liandrin grinding in to Mat how worthless and what an awful friend he is will, presumably, be some pretty good setup for him to show himself to be both loyal and vital in the final episode, though there will probably be more pain for him in the upcoming episodes (maybe involving what happens with Min's viewing about him stabbing Rand).

17. Lanfear is buzzing on such a high of getting show off of her Personal Dragon to a fancy group of lords and ladies at the start of this party.

18. Rand's conversation with Moiraine's sister is particularly fascinating! There's a queen of Cairhien but I suspect that it's not a Damodred (maybe I'll be wrong and Anvaere is the queen! We'll see!). That Anvaere reaches out to the mysterious ~outlander lord~ and shares so much with him is very intriguing, especially if we end up seeing her again later in the season (once Moiraine arrives in Cairhien?).

18. Here is where the cracks in Lanfear's illusion of perfect happiness with her New Lews Therin are beginning to show: he's keeping secrets from her, he's doubting her, and then he just leaves her behind. She is probably getting some very unhappy flashbacks right about now.

19. I wonder if Rand's bad experience with Logain here will inform his choices in the future. In the books, there isn't really a good reason for him to give Taim free rein over the school, but if it's more of a "Taim vs Logain" situation and he already doesn't trust Logain (and Taim appears less affected by the madness), then him trusting Taim might make more sense.

20. Mat being released from a prison cell and not knowing where to go and then (temporarily in this case) returning to his prison gives me echoes of "Mat inexplicably appears by magic in Ebou fucking Dar, a place that treated him like shit for months" from A Memory of Light, lol.

21. Perrin feeling wary about getting too wolfy because of his encounter with Ishamael feels like a much better reason that we got in the books... though I wonder if we'll follow it up by having him meet... shit, the guy who lost himself to the wolf; do not remember his name. But I'm thrilled to have him hanging out with Elyas and the wolves (Hopper?) for now.

22. Liandrin calling Mat Cauthon, agent of chaos, "nothing if not predictable" feels like it needs to bite her in the ass at some point.

23. Yeah, on rewatch, the sex dream is definitely Lanfear feeling like she can finally show her possessiveness and anger in Rand's dream. She is MAD at him for keeping secrets and leaving without her, but she can't show it when he's awake because it doesn't fit her carefully crafted persona. She does NOT like her men with an air of mystery -- she wants to know every tiny thing that he's thinking and feeling. I wonder if Rand actually did light the roof on fire or if Lanfear helped it along -- she's definitely taking advantage of his vulnerability in the aftermath of the fire. "If you ever leave me like that again, I will kill you." Yeah, that's absolutely Lanfear.

And, you know, her inn burning down does mean that she doesn't have to worry about dealing with it anymore. Now that she's had a taste of Rand in fancy coats, I think she probably wants to try to figure out a way to make it happen again.

24. Nynaeve's dream does have a couple of painful easter eggs in it -- Mat gets a wound over his eye; Perrin gets killed by an axe.

Nynaeve does forcibly bring back the arches in the books too, just without so much happening in the illusionary life. But I liked this a lot because of how much it gave us from the other characters who believed that Nynaeve was dead.

25. So, my theories about what we might get in episode four. Wow.

Rand's trajectory... I don't think he's done with Logain. But I feel like ep4 is going to be a big one for him, based on the title (Daughter of the Night). Rand may find out the truth about Selene in this episode, which would be a. be a pretty big betrayal but also b. might make him realize that it's not likely that the Dark One is actually dead.

Moiraine is presumably on her way to Cairhien right now, but it doesn't seem like she thinks Rand himself is there, but more that she's investigating the poem situation, so they may run across each other by accident.

Everyone is going to get to react to Nynaeve powering her way out of the arches (like a boss). I am very curious if Lan is going to spend an episode in the Tower before going after Moiraine... but if Actual Lan goes to the Tower... hard to imagine he wouldn't tell Nynaeve, at least, that Rand is still alive. He knows how deeply Nynaeve cares about the Two Rivers kids.

Unless Liandrin tricks Nynaeve, Elayne, and Egwene into leaving the Tower before Lan arrives there?

Where are Mat and Min going! Mat can't be going after Egwene & co to save them because... nothing to save them from at the moment. Where would Liandrin want him to be led? Falme? I mean, maybe, but he can't channel, so it's not a secure prison for Mat like it would be for the girls.

Perrin's storyline is going to teach us more about the Seanchan and wolfbrothering, I imagine. Maybe some scouting. He can truthfully tell any Seanchan soldiers (if he runs across any) that he's taken the oaths.

Will we follow right on from episode 3 or is there going to be a timeskip to give the characters some time to travel to new locations?

[crowhoonter]

The Acolyte finished and it seemed like everyone hated it so much that they simply needed to continue watching. And you know what? It was actually pretty decent all things considered. The characters ranged from a bit generic to interesting, the choreography was fantastic, the costuming was fun, and the story was fairly interesting.

Sure, it had its stumbling moments, episode 3 in particular was baffling in more than a few aspects, but do you really want to look at that and say it was worse than the Boba Fett show? Seasons 2 and 3 of Mandalorian? Fucking Ahsoka? Do you really want to look at this and tell me its worse than any of the prequel movies?

I don't get it. The Acolyte brought out the worst in this fandom, and for what? To get angry at something that had weird dialogue, like all of Star Wars? To be upset that it delivered a new, actually interesting story unlike everything else (besides Andor) that they have made? What is there to be so upset about? No one actually gives a shit about Ki Ad Mundi so it certainly can't be him and all of that "its too early for him to be there" business. Does a black woman being the lead really bother you cunts that much?

Its just really gross seeing the insane personal attacks that people have been throwing out, often at the actors and writers. It was disgusting when everyone did it to the actors and writers of the sequels, and its disgusting now. If you don't like it then just move on with your life Jesus Christ.

[light-yaers]

Maroon.

Masterlist | AO3 | Ko-Fi

Cassian wasn’t like the others. He was like the red clay beneath the white salt on Crait outpost. He was maroon, and he used to be yours. 

Or: the time you and Cassian met, up until the Battle of Scarif. 

Warnings: major character death [follows Rogue One: A Star Wars Story], grief, trauma, implied sexual content, masses of angst.

A/N: I will just say that I think this is the saddest thing I’ve ever written. Also-- I do attempt to say something in Kenari in this work. I got it by combining Portuguese and Spanish words. It’s not real Kenari. It’s just the best attempt I had. 

Word Count: 10k+

maroon.

Red. 

 That’s the only colour you can see now. Sketched upon every surface, splattered on every flight suit, hidden beneath every fingernail.

 You see it so often now that the entire world seems red. The sky had an ominous haze to it, foggy, with a sickly shade of pink that resembles evaporated blood; sucked up by the clouds; preparing to rain down upon all that you find holy.

 Cassian sees it too, but in different ways.

His red is made up of Ferrix bricks, and the clay that makes up Rix Road. The maroon tinge of grease on his palms, the luminescence of the whiskey that Maarva used to love, B2EMO’s distinctive paint job. 

 He described them all so well that you could imagine everything so vividly. Often times, you found yourself spacing out on perimeter searches and ground missions, mapping out the Ferrix roads and Bix’s section of scrapyard inside your head.

 He didn’t tell everyone about his life.

 You were special, in that sense.

 It had been a while, you knew that, since he’d left his home. For a few months, he worked closely with a higher-up— Luthen Rael— until his expertise was needed elsewhere.

 The more time passed, the more savvy the Empire got when it came to double agents. Luthen was under a constant watchful eye now, too far gone to try and bite back against the thumb that he so callously lived beneath.

 It just wasn’t worth it; for him; or for Cassian.

 You were there when they dropped him off on base; an outpost on Crait. There was nothing much there, bar the salty taste of the air and the vast wasteland.

 But, there was red. Red everywhere. The clay that lay beneath the thick, ice-like layer of salt that covered the planet, exposed by footsteps and tank wheels and X-wing take-offs. 

 So. Much. Red.

 And then, there was Cassian.

 He jumped off the lander hesitantly, strength lined his shoulders and jaw. All he held was a bag of personal belongings, and the eyes of someone who had seen too much, too far, for how old he was. 

 But, he still hadn’t seen salvation. None of you had.

 “Lieutenant,” your commander said, jumping off the ship behind Cassian. You nodded at him on approach, not yet acknowledging the unknown rebel. 

 “Commander. Glad you made it back safely,” you said respectfully.

 “Almost didn’t, but—,” he smacked his hand on Cassian’s shoulder, alerting you to each other. “Andor here got us out of an Imperial mess,” 

 You regarded him then, taking in the complexity of his gaze. “You’re a pilot?” you chided.

 “Anything that can run, I can fly,” 

 “You’ll fit right in,” you smiled, and Cassian’s shoulders instantly relaxed. You stuck your hand out to him in proper greeting. He smacked his palm against yours, shaking your hand softly in return.

 “Lieutenant,” Cassian said.

 “Andor,” you replied. 

 You were one step closer to friends.

 Being on a planet such as this left you with free time— the worst disease you could ever want when in the rebellion. Free time meant suffering souls. Free time meant overthinking. 

 Cassian was in briefings. Having not been on base before, he was subjected to different training. Security, what to do in the event of an attack or ambush, dormitory regulations and the like.

 A few hours after greeting him, you were in the landing bay, going over the mechanic rounds for the fifth time. You’d got so bored that you’d taken to memorising the mechanic teams shift rotations. You were in communications, a Lieutenant, but when things were stale it often left you lonely.

 “Lieutenant,” your commander called, but you were so zoned out you hardly heard. “C-26!” he boomed, prompting you to drop your data pad abruptly. It crashed to the floor, a few buttons pinging off and rolling in all directions.

 You internally cursed.

 “Commander,” you turned to him, noticing Cassian behind him as you did.

 “I know things are dry. Show the new recruit around, will you? The escape routes, the fire doors, the dormitory building,”

 You saluted him, gaining back some of your composure. “Yes, Sir,” 

 He left as soon as he’d arrived, leaving Cassian and you in the landing bay alone. As soon as he was gone, you instantly relaxed, letting out muttered curses beneath your breath as you dropped to the floor, looking for stray data pad parts.

 “He’s a real stick in the mud,” Cassian spoke first, peering down at you as you scrambled on the floor.

 “He’s a very good commander. You’ll learn that with more time here,” you snapped, annoyed more at yourself than at Cassian. He huffed behind you, amused.

 “Is it always this… quiet?” 

 “No. This is abnormal,” you admitted, standing up and assessing the data pad parts in your palm. “Luthen’s off the radar, you know?” 

 Cassian nodded gravely.

 “It was getting too hot,” 

 “What work did you do with him?” you asked, trying to be as unbothered as possible, but Cassian immediately stumbled.

 “Why do you want to know?” 

 You laughed, a belly chuckle. “This isn’t some random planet, Andor. Nor a back alley. This is the rebellion. We share here. We’re on the right side of the war,” 

 Maybe this was a test. Your own secret one to assess him. To work him out. To see what game he was playing. Everyone did it, even if you were all on the same team.

 Cassian regarded you quizzically, trying to work you out.

 “You already know,” he replied. You smiled. He’d caught on immediately. 

 “Aldhani. That’s a feat,” 

 “So I’m told,” 

 “You were there. No point in pushing away congratulations from the rebellion. You deserve it—,” 

 “No, I don’t,” he cut over you, stiff as a board, as hard as steel. His gaze had turned soured, his eyes stone cold. 

 Silence descended the landing bay. You reattached the buttons on your data pad quickly, the clicks of metal upon metal clanging throughout the empty bay.

 “Come on. There’s much to see,” you said finally. The two of you started the tour of the outpost. 

 He never mentioned home, never mentioned Maarva or Bix or Ferrix, in the first few months. Only after you’d been assigned a few dual missions, scouting patrols, being a pilot and comm unit, did he finally open up.

 You did, too.

 “My mother is from Sorgan,” you said gently, five hours into an eight-hour perimeter scout. 

 It was customary to split up tasks on the outpost. It wasn’t like other rebel bases. There weren’t masses of cadets around to borrow. 

 “She never liked grey. Only greens, and blues, and the oranges of the sunset. My father was from Yavin. Same greens, same trees, but completely different ways of living. She moved there for him, uprooted her small village life because she fell in love as soon as she saw him,” 

 You loved talking about your parents.

 You missed them. They were some of the first to join the Alliance, and some of the first to die. You were raised with rebellion in your blood, brought up by your godparents and moved from base to base with them.

 Crait outpost was their attempt at keeping you safe, but all it did was drive you insane. Why someone such as Cassian was here, you didn’t know— it was effectively a ghost town now, with no more than one hundred officials on base, and only acting as a secure link for meetings to take place, or for transport missions.

 “They were rebels?” Cassian asked, sat in front of you and piloting the ship. The space was small, compact, and your flight suits were stuffy, but this was the only time you felt free.

 Shoved in a tiny ship, scouting the outer atmosphere of a planet that you knew like the back of your hand— but you were in the sky, dotted amongst the stars. You craved this.

 “Yes. They died rebels, too,” you said it quickly, getting it out of the way. All rebels had lost someone; maybe everyone; who was close to them. It was customary. 

 “And now, you will finish what they started,” Cassian said, no hint of falseness in his voice.

 You glanced to your left, catching his reflection in the control console. It was the only way you could see each other sat like this. His reflection was wobbled, warped, but you still got to see his eyes. 

 You sort of loved them, really, over the months you’d got to know them with increasing intensity. 

 “That’s the plan,” you leaned back in your seat. 

 The urge to say what about you? was overwhelming, but you bit on your tongue. Getting personal was not obligatory. Being more than acquaintances was less normal than this, but you opened up because this felt different.

 Cassian felt different. 

 You swallowed through the silence, through the cogs whirring in Cassian’s brain. 

 Until they finally clicked.

 “I had a mother. She wasn’t my real mother, but she was as good as. She was all I ever knew,” he started, and you breathed out slowly as relief washed over you.

 This went two ways.

 Good.

 “Maarva was the bravest person in the galaxy. That’s not an exaggeration, it’s the truth. A daughter of Ferrix. Died with honour. She protected me through it all,” he listed off everything he wanted, recalling small details and going on tangents whenever he pleased. 

 You listened intently, laughing at his funny stories, envisioning the copper streets of Ferrix.

 “I was a pain in her ass, I knew it. From age fourteen I was scaling over the wall in the scrapyard to find Bix. We were just kids,” 

 “Was there something more?” this is the first time you properly interjected. He perked his eyebrow up at you in the console reflection.

 You squinted back at him, amused. 

 “Come on. A man like you has to have some broken hearts behind him,” you let out, smiling uncontrollably. He does the same. 

 “For a little while, yes,” he admitted. 

 “Knew it,” you muttered, and Cassian leaned forward slightly. Maybe he was embarrassed. Maybe he was shocked, because you read him so easily. 

 A silence descended across the tiny cockpit, encasing you both in a feeling of knowing. Knowing each other, knowing the stars in the sky, maybe even knowing that all of this was temporary; probably. 

 “When I left Ferrix for the last time, I put her on a ship with Brasso, Bee, some others,” Cassian continued slowly, leaning back in his chair and letting out a sigh. “I promised I’d find her,”

 He hadn’t. 

 “There’s still time,” you said strongly, meaning every word. 

 You knew Cassian well enough by now to know that, when he put his mind to something, more often than not he ended up succeeding. It’d been a long time since he’d left Ferrix; many moons had passed and grown and disappeared in that time; but not Cassian’s love for Bix. 

 Not his allegiance to justice, or the rebellion. Not his skill and brash nature and overly annoying attempts at getting you to laugh during meetings with General Mon Mothma or other higher-ups. 

 You meant every word, every breath. If he tried to, now, he would find his family again. 

 “My time is for the rebellion, now,” he replied finally, sending you a soft smile into the console reflection. “Wherever they are, they’re safer without me,”

 There was nothing you could say to make it better, nothing you could offer to give him even a shred of hope when you knew it was pointless. He was here, and they were elsewhere; that was the way he wanted it, as much as it pained him. 

 You remembered that perimeter search well. You dwelled on it often, mostly when Cassian was off world for missions and you weren’t in contact; or when he was pissing you off to oblivion that you wanted to blast him between the eyes. 

 But, upon every landing; every return to Crait that he graced you with; his hugs got even tighter. 

 When the Death Star hit Alderaan, he was away. You fretted, you cried in private, worried for his safety and whether the Empire would hit his planet next. But, when he returned, you were the first to sprint out to his ship. 

 He dropped himself from the cockpit, skipping over the last two ladder rungs, and almost tripping upon landing, as he scrambled to you— sprinting, full pelt, directly towards each other. 

 He dropped his helmet to the ground, unbothered, before you embraced with an unceremonious smack into each other. 

 “Thank the stars,” you whispered, only loud enough for him to hear. He laughed, but it wasn’t full of comedy; it was relief filled. 

 “Did you miss me?” He squeezed you harder. 

 “Shut up, Cassian.” You squeezed him harder right back, until you were just two rebels, standing in an almost empty landing bay, clutching onto the other like he was the very air that you needed to breathe. 

 On base, you would work around each other in the way giggling school kids would. He would come to the comms rooms just to ask you one question, before hitting you with a joke on his way out. You’d head to the Admiral’s quarters with a message to deliver, only to be hit by Cassian’s gleaming gaze as you entered the room. 

 He was higher-up than you, a Captain, hot shit. But he never looked down on you; not ever. 

 “Captain Andor,” you announced. He stood up straight from his position, leaned down, next to the Admiral.

 “Lieutenant, how can I help?” He smiled at you jokingly. When formalities came into play, he loved chalking it up, making it worse. Purely because neither of you were like it behind closed doors. 

 “I’ve intercepted a relay from a close-by Destroyer. I think it’ll interest you to listen, considering we had a tip from someone on a planet close by about the defector,”

 The Defector. An Imperial pilot that randomly decided to join the side of the rebellion. He’d been the talk of the Alliance since Alderaan had been hit. 

 “Good work, Lieutenant,” Cassian started rounding the circular table that separated you. “Tell me everything you’ve heard,” he stopped to peer down at you, smile on his face, before the two of you left for communications.

 It wasn’t long after that when he left again. On another mission, out amongst the stars while you played the housewife, fixing the same coolant compartments over, and over again, and trying not to go crazy. You could count on one hand the months that you and Cassian had known each other, but that didn’t stop either of you from falling into the trap—

 The trap of care and concern. In the rebellion, it was the worst trap of them all. 

 Against protocol, Cassian sent you message relays this time. Maybe it was due to everything feeling less stable, everything going to shit. The Death Star was in full flight; citizens were at war with their own minds, worrying about whether they’d be the next planet to be destroyed by the power of a dying star. 

 Jedha City, that’s where we’re going. Saw Gerrara is close, as is the defector. I’m with someone who’s very valuable to the cause, someone who can get us close to Gerrara. I’m safe. I miss you. 

 You read them at night, over, and over again. Every crumb and speck of communication that he could muster or even allow. 

 Jedha City, that’s where he, K-2SO, and this mystery helper were. His written words allowed you to imagine him, surrounded by sand, by the wind, by the ruins of old temples and all that sandstone that made up the planet, and the city itself— alone, yes— but also being him. 

 Cassian was brave, Cassian was fearless. He was born to be a rebel, and, despite his troubled upbringing, he was still kind. That was a good sign of his character. 

 “C-26,” your commander approached you one morning. You were alone in comms, choosing to stay during breakfast to get more done. The quiet was the only place where you weren’t reminded of Cassian. “A word?”

 “Of course, Sir,” you swivelled on your chair to peer up at him. 

 “We just received news,” he started, but the tone of his voice shifted immediately. Your heart dropped. “Jedha City has been hit by the Death Star,”

 Words couldn’t describe the jolt that slashed its way through your entire body. 

 “We haven’t received word from Andor or Kay-Two, but due to their mission parameters, their location was on world—,”

 “Stop,” you let out harshly, trying to come to terms with the words he was saying. He stopped when you asked, standing up straight as he waited for you to reply. “You think they didn’t make it out, is that what you’re saying?”

 “I just want you to prepare for the worst,” he replied sullenly. “That’s what I’m saying, C-26. I know you and Andor are close,”

 “That’s irrelevant—,”

 “No, it’s not,” he said strongly, taking you by surprise. “I’ve been at this outpost with you for close to two years, seen you when you’re bored stiff and wondering what the hell your purpose is,” you listened to his every word. “As soon as Cassian showed up, that all changed, don’t deny it,”

 “I’m not,” you said defensively, standing up abruptly to face him, but there was part of you that had completely shut down. 

 This wasn’t the time where you needed someone else to confirm just how close you and Cassian were. This wasn’t the time where you needed someone to drill into you about the extent of your lonely, prior life on this outpost— only gleaming brighter after his very arrival. 

 You needed to raise your guard and focus on your breathing and not spill your guts all over the floor by your commander’s feet. 

 “We’ll find out in a few hours,” he added, finally. “Feel free to take some time.”

 “With all due respect, Commander, I’d rather be so busy that my fingers go numb than sit in the silence of the landing bay and wait for him to come home.”

 He nodded at you, taken aback by the power laced between your words. 

 “As you wish,” he said, softer this time. “Back to work, then, C-26,” he gulped after speaking, like he didn’t want to have the formality of it all right now. Not while you were tensing every muscle in your body to stop yourself from screaming, and he could see that pain written all over your face.

 “Yes, Sir,” you breathed out as you sat back down, swivelling yourself back towards your screens. Your fingers got to work, and your commander disappeared once more. 

 You stayed at your desk for eighteen hours straight. You looked up images of the Death Star hitting Jedha City. You reached out to other bases to see if they had any updates themselves. You scanned the skies with radar until the clockwise motion of the visuals had fucked up your eyes for the night. 

 When you dozed, dreams finally took you. 

 You and Cassian are on a forest planet, somewhere that looks like Yavin and Sorgan combined. He looks younger, almost, less stressed by his years as a rebel. His clothes are clean. Gently, he turns to you as you both stroll through the lush greenery, sticking out his hand for you to take. 

 “Come,” he urges, as you slip your hand into his grasp. When he smiles, it’s like nothing can ever be wrong with the world. “I have to show you something,”

 You follow him as he leads you to a clearing; large and built from limestone. It’s moss covered, dazzling in the sun rays as the vibrant green lights up the entire clearing. It’s soft, it’s warm, and you have Cassian’s hand in your own— there is nothing that could have made you happier. 

 “Here,” he says, tugging you forward with more excitement. You squeal as you stumble into him, but he simply repositions himself and holds you to his chest warmly. 

 You both look out over the horizon. You’re at the top of a cliff; steep and deadly should you fall; but quiet and beautiful where you’re stood. You see mountains on the horizon, snow-capped and covered by a subtle fog. The sun is setting as you breathe in sync, as Cassian gently drops his cheek onto the top of your head. 

 “This view,” he says. “This view reminds me of you,” you watch in silence, a warmth cascading through your gut, as the sky changes to a glowing red. “The colour red reminds me of you. Maroon, burgundy, whatever shade, it doesn’t matter. When I see something red, I think of you, wherever I am in the galaxy,”

 You peer up at him, eyes glassy with emotion. “Red reminds me of you, too,” you admit. “The red of Ferrix bricks. The clay that makes up Rix Road. The maroon tinge of grease on your palms,” you pick up his hand softly, but it is spotless. “The luminescence of the whiskey that Maarva used to love. Bee’s paint job,” you list everything one by one, certain that you’re thinking on the spot, but there is an odd sense of Deja vu that falls over you. 

 Gently, smiling, he takes your chin into his hand, resting his thumb just below your bottom lip. His eyes skim every feature on your desperate face, every wrinkle and bump and scar and bruise. The sign of a rebel is etched on your skin, while he is completely perfect. The small scar above his eyebrow is gone. The collection of dirt stains from clay don’t litter his face. 

 He is perfect, but not his usual perfect. He is perfect in aesthetic ways, not in the ways that make Cassian; Cassian. 

 You suck in a breath as he starts to lean forward, softly, gently, your gut lurching within your body with the desire to absolutely crumble against the feel of his lips on your own. 

 “The red of the Death Star ray,” he whispers, just an inch from your face. 

 “What?” you gasp suddenly, tugging away ever so slightly. 

 “You remind me of that red, too,” he smiles at you so genuinely that you feel sick. “The red of the Death Star. The red of the Death Star that killed me,”

 “Cassian—,” you stutter, pulling away from him. He’s still smiling, and you feel like you might vomit your guts upon the forest floor at any moment. “No,” you find your words. “You’re not my Cassian,”

 “Here it is, now,” he says, turning back to the horizon. The sunset that once faced the sky has now been replaced— by an explosion the size of a small moon. Debris already litters the crater, as the impact of the ray heads in every direction on the planet. 

 You look at him, distraught, but he’s in some kind of trance. 

 “Look at that,” he breathes out, before turning back to you. “What a beautiful way to die.”

 You woke up to beeping. Incessant and shrill, you shot up in your chair as you realised what had happened. You’d fallen asleep at your desk, drifted into dreams that were unable to replicate Cassian in person. Quickly, you shut off your systems. When the beeping stopped, you leaned back in your chair and tried not to think about how your fingers were shaking, how your heart was beating out of your chest. 

 Inhale. Shake. Exhale. Shake. Inhale. Shake. Exhale. Cry. 

 You wiped away a stray tear, not wanting your own subconscious to be your downfall. You wouldn’t let it, wouldn’t let it show. He had to be alive, somewhere out there, he had to still be completing this mission. 

 What a beautiful way to die. 

 You switched off the light by your desk, knowing it was time to call it a day. You wouldn’t be of help if you were sleep deprived. Hoisting yourself from your chair, you left communications glumly. Your back clicked when you stretched yourself out. 

 The bays were empty. You had no idea what time it was, but from the quiet of the outpost, you guessed everyone was in their dorms. Gently, you placed your hand on one of the X-wings in the bay. It was customary for pilots to swipe the noses of their ships before take-off, just for good luck, just for the hell of it. 

 You always oddly loved the way Cassian did it. Before every perimeter search or recon mission, the methodical way he so delicately placed his hand and dragged it against the smooth metal of his ship reminded you of the soft way he draped his arm around others; around you. 

 Oh, Maker, please let him be alive. 

 Back in your dorm, you didn’t sleep— but you still dreamt. You dreamt of him, of the real Cassian, not the one that had infiltrated your mind beforehand.

 In the morning, a knock woke you from your dozing. As the door wooshed up, you were hit with the face of your commander. You saluted him immediately, standing to attention. 

 “Sir,”

 “At ease,” he said breathlessly. He’d run all the way here. “There’s a call for you,”

 “Sir?” you let out, but he was already smiling. 

 “It’s Cassian.”

 The two of you sprinted to the control room, hearts in your throats. Your commander was older, but not by much. Your godparents had placed you under his command for a reason, and you knew this was one of those times. His softness was needed, as too was his formality and allegiance to the rebellion as a whole. 

 He cared; and that’s what mattered in the long run. 

 You rounded the corner to the control room and almost stumbled, but he grabbed your waist before you could trip. “Come on. He’s on the General’s frequency,”

 The General’s frequency? This was a line solely reserved for Alliance Generals to talk to one another undisturbed. This was unheard of; Cassian was a Captain; you were a Lieutenant. 

 As you passed the control table, you slowed your breathing. A comm headset sat atop a desk, just waiting for you. Your commander stayed behind you, filling the room with a calmer energy. “Go on, C-26,” he urged, and you almost burst out laughing; from relief. 

 You peered back at him, sending him the softest smile you had within you. He reciprocated in full. 

 “I’ll leave you be,” he decided, before stepping back slowly. When the thud of his boots disappeared down the corridor, you finally allowed yourself to pick up the headset. 

 You slipped it on, feeling the pump of blood in your ears and the incessant beat of your heart as you prayed to the Maker. Then, you clicked the relay button. 

 “Cassian?” You whispered pathetically, but there was no other way around how you felt. 

 “Meu korazon,” his voice trickled over you like honey, in some language that you couldn’t identify. He’d called you it many times before—it was a long time joke that he never told you what it meant, but you still felt warm whenever the name cascaded over you. The relief in his tone is what got to you the most. 

 “What does that mean?” you asked, on the brink of tears. Cassian chuckled; it was a sound you loved. 

 “Nothing,” he let out, changing his tone. “I’m just happy to hear your voice. Meu korazon,” he repeated. You shut your eyes, trying not to utterly explode into tears. You’d never felt more relieved in your life, never been happier to hear someone’s voice.

 “Where are you?”

 “Yavin 4. We got off Jedha in time, just before the planet was destroyed,”

 “We?”

 “Me, Kay, and some stragglers we’ve picked up. The defector is with us, and two protectors of the temple from Jedha. And—,” he stopped, sucking in a deep breath. “Jyn Erso,”

 “Erso?” You let out instinctually. Everyone knew of Galen Erso, Imperial weapons designer, the man responsible for the fucking Death Star. 

 “It’s complicated, not something that I can explain over a comm relay,” he admitted, and your heart sank. You knew things were escalating, knew missions were in place. You waited for orders to rally every single day, knowing that it was only a matter of time before a strike occurred on the Death Star.

 “Are you coming back?” You whispered. “To Crait,”

 He went silent for a moment, and you knew what his answer would be. 

 “No, I’m not,” he let out. Your heart broke, the blood rushed to your head. “You’re coming to Yavin 4 instead.”

 The shuttle came for you as soon as possible. Your commander had set it up without question, knowing that it was time for you to get involved elsewhere. This wasn’t just about Cassian; it was about you. You packed in record speed, bringing the limited items that you owned and fitting them in one bag alone. 

 Before you left your dorm, you etched your name on the underside of the small desk in the corner. Others had done it too, names like Lynx 2BBY. You added yours, scribbling 0BBY next to it, knowing that you wouldn’t be coming back again. You had more purpose than this, more than working behind the scenes when you knew you were capable.

 Cassian knew it too. Knew that you could do more; wanted to do more; to end this war once and for all. 

 You jumped on the shuttle before your commander, but he stopped by the hull door. You turned back, rucksack on your shoulder, and peered down at him. “You’re not coming, are you?” You knew. He shook his head with a small smile. 

 From this position, you were closer to his height now, basically the same. It felt odd, being able to look him in the eye fully; it also felt needed. 

 “There’s still work for me to do here,” he said finally. 

 It sunk in then that this might be the last time you saw him for a long time. Depending on how things went, depending on the mission at hand with Jyn Erso. 

 “Thank you,” you said. “For being the best commander to work beneath, and for being my friend,” you meant it. 

 “It’s been a pleasure,” he smiled, before saluting you once more. You saluted back strongly, before the hull door slowly rose, cutting you off from each other.

 He waved as you took off, flying high above the outpost until you left the atmosphere. 

 You arrived at the hight of the meeting. Mon Mothma and Bail Organa were present, amongst others. The room was packed to the brim as you entered at the back, rising onto tiptoes to see better.

 “There’s no choice but to retreat! The Empire will stop at nothing to ensure every base, every planet that we inhabit, is dead and gone—,”

 “There’s a flaw!” A young woman spoke up, someone that you knew to be Jyn Erso. You stepped through two others, looking out into the light. The breath hitched in your throat when you saw Cassian next to her. “There’s a flaw planted specifically for this use. We need to gather a team and strike it while the iron is hot,”

 “With all due respect, Gerrara and your father are dead, Erso,” Tynnra Pamlo spoke up softly, but with purpose. “How can we believe these claims? When there is so much at stake and our resources are already running so thin,”

 “I can vouch for her,” Cassian stepped forward abruptly. You flinched as he did, his eyes skimming the crowd of higher-ups and rebels— until his gaze finally hit yours. 

 He stopped, going silent for a moment as a few sets of eyes hit yours from following his own. Jyn followed his gaze, too, and when her stare hit yours, her expression softened. Perhaps, Cassian had told her about you. He’d gone to all this trouble just to get you here; had called you over the General’s frequency to ensure that you knew he was alive and well. Had called you meu korazon, whatever that may mean. 

 My heart. My heart. 

 You smiled at her, before glancing back to Cassian. 

 “Go on, Captain,” Mon Mothma urged him, and the moment ended. “Continue.”

 “I can vouch for Jyn,” Cassian repeated. “I was there, both on Jedha and on Eadu. I saw the hologram with my own eyes,”

 “That’s all well and good, Captain, but there is no evidence. It’s been destroyed. We simply have no choice,” Vasp Vaspar chimed in, but he looked almost apologetic. 

 “You’re asking us to invade an Imperial installation based on nothing but hope,” Pamlo spoke up again, looking directly at Jyn. Jyn smiled sadly, strongly. 

 “Rebellions are built on hope.”

 It wasn’t enough.

 “So, it is decided,” Pamlo spoke again. “We will scatter our fleet, retreat to safer planets, hide away— until we are strong enough to fight back against their weapon,”

 “No— please, Senator—,” Jyn persisted, but Pamlo held up her hand. 

 “All those in favour of retreating?” 

 The majority put their hands up. The room fell silent. 

 “It is done.” Pamlo left first, followed by the scattering of cadets and rebels. 

 You fought against the dissipating sea of people to get to him. Cassian caught your eye, pointing to the door, so you followed the rest of the gaggle back to the landing bays. Your heart was in your throat when you made it out, glancing and scanning over all the pilots, mechs, and techs that left the meeting with upset frowns on their faces. 

 When Cassian emerged, he pushed himself through the crowd and broke into a run immediately. 

 “Cassian—,” you breathed out, but the air was ripped from your lungs when he bombarded you into an embrace. He held you for a long moment, so hard that you could feel his heart as it pumped in his body, syncing up with your own. “Thank the stars,” you let out from relief; a saying that you’d said to him so many times before, on missions where he almost hadn’t made it home. 

 “Did you miss me, meu korazon?” He whispered, only loud enough for you to hear. 

 “I always miss you,” gently, he brought his hand to the back of your head, stroking your hair softly. You nuzzled your cheek into the nook between his shoulder and neck, breathing him in. 

 This felt different. They said that distance made the heart grow fonder, but you and Cassian weren’t like normal people. Perhaps it was the threat of death that kept you so close, the worry that one of you might never return when they left. Either way, it had come to this. You thanked the Maker for him. 

 When he pulled away, he raised his hand to your cheek. You smiled; before punching him in the stomach swiftly. 

 “Hey!” He yelped. 

 “How many times do I have to tell you to not die?” You exclaimed. 

 “I didn’t!”

 “You almost did!” You pointed at him threateningly. 

 “But— I didn’t,” he said, straightening himself out as his surprised tone mellowed. He smirked at you, but you shot him with a look of fire.

 “Don’t you dare make that face at me,” 

 “What face? This is just my face,”

 “You know exactly what face I mean, hot shot. That little smirk,” you imitated the smirk. “Like you know everything, like you’ve just thrown an insult at me and are proud of yourself,”

 “Have I ever told you that you look beautiful when you’re angry?” 

 You almost swallowed your tongue, stepping back and immediately feeling your ears go boiling hot at his comment. You crossed your arms, trying to ignore the way his gaze was eating you up inside. It skimmed down your body and all the way up again, divulging all your secrets within seconds. 

 “No, you haven’t,” you almost spat it out, knowing that the heat was growing onto your cheeks as well. “You should more often, you piece of Bantha shit,”

 His smirk turned into a full grin, which then prompted chuckles to burst from his lips. You rolled your eyes at him, pissed off and flattered and wanting him all at the same time.

 “I hate you, I swear,” you said through clenched teeth. A lie. 

 “Don’t swear it. You know you don’t hate me, meu korazon,”

 “Tell me what that means,” you uncrossed your arms, stepping closer to him again. “Tell me, Cassian.”

 He sucked in a deep breath, and suddenly the roles had shifted. His ears got warm; his cheeks went rouge. He kissed his teeth as he accepted this; he had to tell you the truth after so many months.

 “It means—,” 

 “It means cooler than him,” Jyn spoke up suddenly, approaching you both gently. “Because you are definitely cooler than him,” she said, and you couldn’t help but smile. She stuck her hand out to you gently, which you took happily. “Everything he’s told me about you has been good,”

 “I should hope so,” you joked, as the two of you looked back at Cassian. He looked awkward, or caught out, or both. 

 “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” his voice trailed off, as he placed his hands on his hips and looked uncomfortably around the bay. 

 Eventually, others gathered. You were introduced to Bodhi, the defector, a scrawny pilot with a big heart; Chirrut and Baze, the temple protectors; a few others who wanted Jyn’s plan to be set in motion. It was clear that they’d all been through a lot— Jedha, Eadu—and now their want to do something good had been denied. 

 Throughout the solemn chat, you stuck by Cassian’s side. At one point, he placed his hand on the small of your back, peering down at you like you were pure gold. This was the Cassian that you adored— tired, but still fighting. There was dirt on his forehead and some dark circles under his eyes, but he still looked perfect. 

 “I knew they wouldn’t believe you,” he said to Jyn, peering down at the floor with his hand on his hip, the other on you. Gently, you wrapped your arm around his back, too, just so he knew you were there. 

 Jyn stepped forward, a look like fire on her face. “Thanks for the support,” she said stubbornly. Cassian met her eye. 

 “But I do,” he said strongly. “We do,”

 Men and women gathered, over thirty of them, all ready to stand up and fight for the cause that they believed in. When Cassian spoke, you held onto his every word. He was impossible not to listen to, impossible not to go utterly silent whenever a speech erupted itself from his mouth.

 Jyn approached you and Cassian after it was decided; they would all fight.

 “I’m not used to people sticking around,” Jyn smiled, a smile that you knew to be genuine. She turned to you gently. 

 “Welcome home,” you let out. 

 What ensued was a heist of epic proportions. You helped Bodhi locate a stray passenger lander, watched as he powered it up, checked the fuel gage and coolant compartment. You sat in the co-pilot seat, going through checks. 

 “I thought you were in communications?” Bodhi asked somewhat frantically. He had a rapid way of talking, but he was sweet. 

 “I am,”

 “Then how do you know so much about ships? Do you pilot as well?” you scoffed at his question. 

 “In the Alliance, we’re all all-rounders, truthfully. But—after my parents died—I wasn’t allowed to fly anymore,” you admitted. 

 “Why?” you shrugged, sad whenever you remembered your godparents taking that away from you. 

 “My guardians when I was growing up, they just want to protect me. I just wish—I wish that they’d realise I’m good for more than this,” 

 “This is legendary,” Bodhi said suddenly. “Hijacking an Alliance lander, going to Scarif for the Death Star plans. This is what someone like you was made for,” you knew you’d only just met him, but your heart reached out to him. 

 You placed your hand on his forearm, nodding at him in appreciation. 

 “Thanks, Bodhi.” You smiled at him, eyes glassy. 

 “This is what I’ve been saying for almost a year,” Cassian’s arrival made you flinch. You swivelled around to meet his gaze, looking at him knowingly as he peered down at you proudly. “You’ve always been capable of so much more, but you’ve been held back your entire life,”

 “Who are your guardians? Are they here?” Bodhi asked. You sucked in a sharp breath. 

 “They’re both Admirals,” you confessed. “They’re not posted in this system, they’re elsewhere, but,” you glanced back at Cassian, shooting his own smirk back at him. “What they don’t know, won’t hurt them,”

 Cassian pointed at you, leaning down affectionately, and bringing his fingers to hold you by the chin. His thumb rested just below your bottom lip; just like the dream; but this was real. 

 “This is why I love you,” he said lowly. Bodhi turned away with an awkward smile on his face. 

 “Tell me what meu korazon means, you coward,” 

 “Not until you ask nicely,” Cassian joked, shifting his thumb ever so slightly upwards, so it was swiping against your lip. You fought the urge to smash your face onto his; he was so close, it would be easy, and he’d definitely expect it. “You’re looking at my lips, meu korazon,” he whispered, and you all too late realised that you had been staring at his mouth.

 It was hard not to. 

 “Because I’m waiting for you to tell me what it means,” you lied. 

 “I’ll go find Jyn—the ship is ready to fly,” Bodhi said quickly, removing himself from the cockpit as soon as possible. Cassian laughed to himself, a knowing laugh that radiated through every pore in your body. 

 “I forgot he was still there, truthfully,” Cassian let out. You held your breath with embarrassment, falling into him ever so slightly.

 “We’re awful people,”

 “We’re only human, you can’t blame us,” 

 “I can, and I will blame us,” you chuckled out, bobbing your shoulders softly with built up laugher. You had to bring a hand over your mouth to stop yourself from giggling to oblivion. 

 “Hey,” Cassian said, annoyed suddenly. “Don’t do that,” he grabbed your hand gently and pulled it away from your mouth, holding it in his own. “I was about to kiss you, that’s just not fair,”

 He swiped his thumb over your bottom lip. Your heart jolted beneath your ribcage, lurching forward so quickly that you’re surprised you didn’t kiss him as soon as his words had stopped being spoken. He was looking at you like you were gold, like you were the red of the sunset that both of you loved, the maroon clay that laid beneath the salt on Crait, where you’d both met all those months before. 

 “Tell me what meu korazon means, and you can kiss me all you like,” you whispered, giving him an ultimatum. He let out a soft huff, peering down at the floor as an excuse to lay his forehead on yours. 

 His hand wound its way onto your cheek, his thumb swiping there instead. 

 “You’re impossible,” he let out. You shut your eyes, feeling the strength in his arms as you laid your hands on his biceps, just to hold him as he squatted on the floor by the co-pilot chair. 

 “That’s why you love me,” 

 “I do,” you opened your eyes. “I really do,” he admitted. “My heart. It means—you’re my heart, meu korazon.”

 My heart, my heart. How many times had he called you it? He’d started after a trip where his cover had been blown. He’d come home, beaten and bruised to within an inch of his life. You cared for him for days, fussing over him in the med-bay, reading him books as he lay in bed.

 That’s when he’d called you it for the first time, all those months ago. Since then, you’d asked around about it. What language it could be, if anyone knew what it meant, since Cassian had been so against telling you every time you’d asked. 

 Now you knew why. He’d been waiting for to realise it, waiting for you to understand that you were his heart, his body, his love. 

 You kissed him before you lost your nerve. It felt like coming home. It was everything you’d ever wanted and more. He was soft, but you felt the fire within him. One that started in both of your guts and grew outwards, overtaking every sense and controlling your every move. 

 When you pulled away, you took the time to indulge in the way he looked. A deer in headlights, flushed, breathing heavily. 

 “If you’d told me that sooner, I would have kissed you sooner,” you let out, a few chuckles escaping alongside the words. 

 “We’ll just have to make up for lost time,” he smiled, holding you close. 

 You both stayed like that for a while, laughing subtly at the fact you’d finally done it—you and Cassian had finally told each other the truth, spilled your guts upon the floor for each other, felt the other in a way that you’d both so desperately wanted behind closed doors. 

 When the shuttle engine started, all of you held your breath. 

 “Cargo shuttle, read back, please. What’s going on out there?” the control tower spoke through the pilot comms. Jyn approached Bodhi, squatting by his side to hear better. “That ship’s off limits, no one’s supposed to be on board until further instructions,”

 Bodhi clicked the relay. “Uh—yes, yes, we are. Affirmative,”

 “That’s an impounded Imperial ship. What’s your call-sign, pilot?”

 Bodhi looked to Jyn, stuttering over his words. You watched her mouth we have to go, while Bodhi continued to struggle with what to answer.

 “Say something,” Jyn whispered, fierce. “Come on,”

 Bodhi exhaled shakily. “Rogue,” he glanced around for approval. “Rogue One,”

 “Rogue One? There is no Rogue one,”

 K-2SO switched on the radar scanner, evidently running out of patience. “Well, there is now,”

 The shuttle took off abruptly, rising into the sky as fast as Bodhi and K2 could get it off the rebel base. As soon as you left the atmosphere, you were punched into hyperspace. You stood with Cassian by the cockpit, watching the blue lights of lightspeed cover the ship windshield. 

 You were going into the belly of the beast, right into the enemy’s hands, but you’d never felt more part of something. 

 Flying through Scarif’s shield was up there as the scariest moment of your life, but still you all persisted. Cadets in the back got on their gear and checked their blasters, dusting off their helmets and preparing themselves both mentally and physically for what was about to come.

 Upon landing, Cassian took you aside gently. 

 “I need you to stay here,” he explained. “We need someone on the ground with Bodhi while Jyn and I find the data inside. It’s too risky having more of us inside the building,”

 “Okay,” you said, just so he knew you understood. Gently, he placed a communicator into your hand, wrapping your fingers around it slowly. 

 “For you and me. You need me, you call me,” he whispered. Once again, this was not allowed, but he was doing it for you. 

 All of a sudden, everything hit you all at once. He was leaving, the same way he did every time he took off from Crait outpost and went off world. He was leaving, and he may not come back this time. Really not come back this time.

 You peered up at him with all your strength, widening your eyes to get across every fibre of your love for him, everything. 

 “Come back to me, Cassian.”

 “I’m not going anywhere,” he laid his hand on your cheek. “I promise,”

 “Because, I swear, I’ll kill you otherwise. I really will,” you let out, stuttering over your word and trying not to crumble completely. 

 Cassian leant forward and kissed you simply—as if it was the most normal thing he could ever do. When he pulled away, that fucking smirk was on his face again. The one you loved to hate, but dreamt about when he wasn’t around. 

 “What a beautiful way to die, meu korazon.” he said. 

 And then, he was gone. 

 And all hell broke loose.

 First, it was the troopers. There were so many of them, all with their blasters firing. You stayed with Bodhi in the ship while cadets fought them outside, knowing that you needed to be here for the transmission of the plans. It was essential. 

 Then, it was the walkers. They bombarded over the landing bays and destroyed ships and people alike. Smashing their bulking feet down upon the ground without so much as a second glance. 

 Chirrut and Baze were dead. You struggled to breathe. 

 Come on, Cassian. 

 Bodhi had sent distress signals to all branches of the galaxy, praying for rebels to arrive. It was a call to action, a cry for help. You needed all the help you could get, as the war raged outside and you focused on not losing your cool. 

 “Bodhi!” you screamed, just so he could hear you. You were sat at the secondary comms, heart in your throat at what you were hearing. The tears came faster than you could have imagined. “They’re here! They heard us!”

 Above Scarif’s shield entrance, two dozen rebel ships had arrived. They were there to help, there to answer your call. Bodhi grabbed his comm immediately, knowing what to do. 

 “Rogue One to the Rebellion!” he yelled. 

 “This is Admiral Raddus to Rogue One!”

 “Raddus, they have the plans. They found the Death Star plans. They have to transmit them from the communications tower! You have to take down the shield gate, it’s the only way we’re gonna get them through!” he spoke quickly, efficiently, and for a moment you allowed yourself to feel relieved. 

 “Pull up a hammerhead corvette—I have an idea. Stand by Rogue One, we’re on it!” Raddus replied. Bodhi bowed his head in thanks. 

 After the battle for the past hour, the fear of death from every trooper and walker and higher up on this godforsaken planet, you were hopeful—you were hopeful. 

 “This is for you, Galen,” Bodhi whispered to himself. It was go time. 

 “Bodhi, we need to tell Cassian—,”

 “Grenade!” he yelled over you, as the tinker of metal upon the hull of the ship alerted you both to the danger. 

 You had seconds to live. 

 You did the first thing you could think of; you clipped a blaster to you hip and jumped out of the shuttle; right before it exploded and blasted into a thousand pieces. You fell onto the sand of the landing pad, covering your head and ignoring the agonising sting of burns on your back. 

 All around you, troopers and cadets lay dead on the floor. Debris littered the sand. The once beautiful seclusion of the bay, surrounded by swinging palm trees, had been obliterated. 

 And Bodhi. Bodhi lay, burning, on the hull of the destroyed and on fire wreckage of Rogue One. 

 It was hard to hope for the best when all you wanted to do was join him. You felt the guilt first, then the grief, then the excruciating pain of all the losses you’d endured. You knew what you’d signed up to, knew this was always inevitable, but that didn’t stop you from feeling broken.

 When you moved, your skin burned. But still, you moved. You moved into the tree line, into the last of the greenery that surrounded you. You think your mother would have done the same, and your father; hidden in the foliage; made friends with the leaves as you focused on not dying. 

 You gulped down the pain, knowing that you needed medical attention; badly. It would have to wait. 

 You grabbed the communicator Cassian gave you and turned it on. You clicked the relay. 

 “Cassian,” you croaked. “Cassian—everyone’s dead,” you said, not even knowing if he was listening on the other end. 

 Static was all you were met with, until he finally replied. 

 “I know,” was all he said. “So is Kay-Two. But, you are alive,”

 “And you,” you said bluntly, struggling to be emotive when your energy was all but gone. “I’m trapped, at the landing pads. There are walkers, and—there were troopers—Bodhi. He’s—,” you stuttered through the words, trying to hold it together.

 “Use that big brain of yours,” he urged you forward. “I know you can get out, meu korazon. Through the shield gate, back to the Rebellion,”

 “Not without you,” the tears came thick and fast as you realised what was happening. “Where are you, my love?” you struggled to get it out.

 “We’re at the communication tower. Krennic—he got me with his blaster,” you stifled a sob. “We’re waiting now, for the shield to go down. We’re so close,”

 You allowed yourself to picture the perfect outcome: Raddus manages to open the shield gate, allowing the Rebellion into the atmosphere. They blast away the last of the enemy, kill Krennic where he stands, destroy their ships and leave them marooned on the planet to rot. 

 You find a ship and pick up Jyn and Cassian from atop the tower. They crawl into your ship and fall to the ground, hugging, safe, while you fly them far away from this god-awful place—back home; back to Yavin 4.

 You kiss Cassian a thousand times; you kiss him until your lips go numb and your belly hurts from all the laughter that he causes to burst from within you. He touches you softly and warmly, keeping you safe while also letting you roam free; the way you’ve always wanted to live. 

 You destroy the Death Star. You destroy the Empire, together. Alive. 

 “Okay,” you said, shutting your eyes and dispelling the last of your cold tears. You sucked in a shaking breath, forcing yourself to stand. “I’m finding a ship and getting off this fucking planet. And then—I’m coming back for you, Cassian. I will always come back,”

 “Meu korazon, I know,” 

 His comms cut off. You forced yourself to move.

 You blasted your way through the last trooper stragglers, going from landing pad to landing pad, looking for a ship. When you found one, you thanked the Maker within your heart. Somewhere deep down, you let yourself rejoice. 

 Just this once. Only for a second. 

 You’re working on autopilot when you entered the beat-up lander, praying that the engine is still usable. It stopped and stuttered to life, while you worked on powering up the comms systems. The static pinged abruptly, and you fiddled with the frequency knob until you could hear Admiral Raddus. 

 “Admiral, this is—,” you stopped. You didn’t know what to say. “I’m on landing pad four. How is the shield gate plan going?”

 “Tell me your call-sign, Lieutenant,” he pushed you, replying over the static. You sat in the pilot seat, looking out the dirtied windshield. 

 “Rogue Two,” you made it up on the spot. It was fitting.

 “Rogue Two, copy. Look at the sky,” he said knowingly. 

 You leaned forward, looking at the sky above. The blue haze of the shield gate had all but disappeared, after a Star Destroyer had crashed directly through it. It was still falling—in that slow motion sort of way that is both menacing and beautiful. 

 “They did it,” you whispered, but your comms were still on. 

 “The plans are being transmitted and uploaded as we speak, Rogue Two,” he announced. You thanked him, before clicking off your relay and got to piloting. 

 Before you could think, you took off in you ship. Quickly, you headed to the tower. If they were still up there, there was a chance that you’d be able to pick them up. You prayed, you hoped, you dreamed. 

 Cassian. 

 “Cassian,” you said over yours and his comm. “I’m in an Imperial lander, circling the tower. Where are you?”

 Only static came from the communicator. 

 “Cassian, come in,” you urged, as tears fell from your distressed eyes. 

 Nothing. 

 “Cassian!” you shouted, you screamed, you raged. 

 “Rogue Two—get out of there!” Admiral Raddus exclaimed over your ship comm. “They’re here. The Death Star is here,”

 You ceased to breathe. On the horizon, you saw it. Hulking, large, a sickly shade of grey and the size of a fucking planet as it loomed over everything. It covered the sun, casting a shadow over the entire planet. 

 “Rogue Two, that’s an order!” another voice came over your comms, but it wasn’t Raddus. “Don’t you dare disobey your commander,”

 “Commander?” you replied, eyes still glued to the horizon as you circled the tower for a third time. 

 “The shield gate is down. Leave the atmosphere, Rogue Two. Now,” he pleaded, and you wanted to rip the control console before you. You wanted to destroy every scrap of metal, every bolt, every button, and scanner that resided in this grim ship. 

 You only wanted him. You needed him. 

 “I can’t, Sir,” you croaked. 

 “Yes, you can,” he urged. You could picture his face, concerned and worried and on the brink of a meltdown in his X-wing, up in the stars. “Yes, you can!” he exclaimed again, shouting at you full pelt. 

 With every wasted second, the Death Star was gaining power and would soon blow. It would destroy the planet in minutes, seconds. Immediately. 

 “Please,” he let out. “You have so much more to do in this life.”

 You grimaced when you left the tower, heading for the upper atmosphere. You could see the collection of rebel ships, above the destroyed shield gate. Admiral Raddus, Bail Organa, your commander. They were all here—they’d all responded and helped. 

 You didn’t say a word as you entered space, letting the darkness encase you. You ignored the stars; the stars weren’t the same without him here. They would never be. 

 You blocked out the frantic comm relays from your ears. Something about Vader himself, something about the plans still uploading—nothing about Cassian. You turned off your comms altogether; you would follow the rebels back to base when you saw them jump into hyperspace; but this time was for you and Cassian. 

 Picking up your communicator, you looked down at the planet beneath you. Somewhere, Cassian was still down there. Jyn was still down there. 

 “Cassian,” you tried again, hating the sound of the static after each word. “Cassian,” your voice wobbled, your tears started to fall again. “My love, I need you. You said, if I needed you, to call you. I’m calling you, Cassian. I need you,”

 The air shifted when the Death Star fired on Scarif.

 You watched in horror as the initial blast slowly erupted, crumbling the crust of the planet as if it were nothing but a piece of paper that had been stabbed by a sharp lead pencil. 

 “Do you see it, meu korazon?” Cassian’s voice croaked over the comm. You almost vomited up your heart. “The colour of the sky. It’s red, but still soft. It reminds me of you,”

 You bit away the want to scream. 

 “Describe it to me,”

 “The skies used to look like this when I was a boy—on Kenari. They were so soft, so red, casting a glow over our forests and reflecting off the waxy leaves that we used to build our homes,” his voice was beautiful. You memorised every syllable and note and croak that he could muster. “My sister would clap at the sunset, every night. It happened so fast. One minute, the sky was still blue, the next a pale pink, and then—you,”

 “Me?” you sniffed through your tears. You couldn’t see properly. 

 “You. That shade of maroon, the deep kind. The kind that warms you. The kind that I see whenever I close my eyes. You,”

 The explosion was spreading fast, forcing the water from the vast ocean of the planet in all directions. 

 “Where are you, my love?” you asked. You wished you hadn’t.

 “On the beach, meu korazon. It’s beautiful. I’m with Jyn,”

 “Good,” your voice shook. 

 The first of the rebel ships flew into hyperspace around you. Time was up. 

 “Cassian,” you wobbled. “I love you,”

 “I know,” he said, huffing slightly. “I’ve loved you since you dropped that data pad and scrambled on the floor to pick up the buttons,”

 “Meu korazon,” you stuttered out. 

 “Meu koraz—,” the communicator went dead. 

 All you could hear was static, the ugly kind, the kind that made you want to vomit up your heart and use it to drive the ship home. 

 “Cassian?” you shut your eyes, feeling every muscle in your body give up. The air was ripped from your lungs. “Cassian!” you let out a scream so shrill it could’ve curdled cream. 

 Below you, the last of the planet was being destroyed. The crust crumbled like breadcrumbs, scattering out into the stars, while the core lay slowly dying. The light of a dying planet—it was maroon.

 Just like him. 

 Admiral Raddus’ ship blasted into hyperspace quickly, so you had no choice but to follow. There were only a few ships left now, including the looming Star Destroyer on the horizon that you knew wasn’t the ally. 

 You blinked away your tears, punching your ship into hyperspace as you collapsed onto the console. You wept, you cried so badly that your throat went red raw. The communicator was flush in your palm, cutting off the blood circulation and turning your knuckles white all the while. 

 You could no longer dream.

 When you returned to base, you didn’t speak for four days. You went back to work, helping Mon Mothma with a statement and planning the first stages of the attack on the Death Star. Despite doing it without words, Mon Mothma still chose to rank you up. 

 Captain. You were a Captain now, just like he was. 

 “Congratulations, Captain,” your commander approached you in the comms room. You were alone, but you preferred it that way. He was staying on Yavin 4 until rebels were needed at Crait once again. 

 He saluted you, and you silently laughed, allowing yourself a small smile. 

 “How does it feel, hm?” he sat next to you, smiling at you sullenly. 

 You said nothing, still not comfortable with the sound of your voice after you listened to it for so long—screaming, wailing—a few days prior. It made you feel sick. 

 When you didn’t reply, your commander shuffled to find something in his pocket. “I thought I’d bring these for you. He was always leaving his stuff around, you know? His dorm was next to mine, and it was gross,”

 Gently, he dangled Cassian’s dog tags before you. He never wore them, there was no point when he was always on recon missions. It would be a dead giveaway. You sucked in a deep breath as he slowly lowered them into your palms. They were cold, freezing cold, like they’d been left in the snow for days. You instinctually warmed them with your fingers. Turning them over, you read his name. 

 Captain Cassian Andor. 

 You were speechless, and not just because you’d decided not to talk for days on end. There were no words that would be thanks enough for what your commander had just given you. You had nothing of Cassian’s, nothing to remember him by, until now. 

 Gently, you skimmed your fingers over the metal over and over again, furrowing your brows when the tears started to well behind your eyes. 

 You looked up at your commander. “Thank you,” it burst from your lips, a coarse whisper, but words, nonetheless. He smiled. 

 “There she is. I was starting to miss her,” he said fondly.

 He left you to have some time, smiling as he exited the communication bay. You exhaled shakily as you finally put them around your neck. They were cold when you shoved them beneath your shirt, resting them over your heart. 

 This was the Alliance. The Rebellion. And Cassian had fought valiantly for what he believed in. An excellent pilot, a stellar fighter, the man you loved and who loved you back. It seemed only fitting that he would return to the sky, where he came from. 

 Scattered amongst the stars forevermore. 

 Meu korazon.  

[enigmaticexplorer]

Six Options for Star Wars Watching Order: For those who don't know where to start

Hi @violetasteracademic! I saw your comment asking about Star Wars and because Tumblr’s comments only allow so many words, I thought it best if I typed out a complete response :) 

I’m going to break this down into six watching orders depending on your preferences for engaging with Star Wars content. 

The first option is a general, easy way to get back into Star Wars that focuses only on the 11 movies.

The second option is for people who are NOT interested in watching animated shows; this focuses solely on the 11 movies + live action shows. 

The third option is intense and combines movies + live action shows + animated shows.

The fourth option is for those who've seen the movies and are only interested in live action shows.

The fifth option is for those who've seen the movies and are interested only in the animated shows.

The sixth option is for those who've seen the movies and are interested in watching both the live action and the animated shows. (This is my recommended viewing option for those who have already seen all 11 movies.)

Option One: The Simple Viewing Order of Star Wars

If you want to get back into Star Wars but aren’t 100% sure what content you want to engage with, I would start by rewatching all 11 movies. Recommended watching orders depend on each person. I recommend watching in chronological order, especially since you’ve already seen the movies before:

The Prequel Trilogy (The Phantom Menace, Attack of the Clones, Revenge of the Sith)

Solo

Rogue One

The Original Trilogy (A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi)

The Sequel Trilogy (The Force Awakens, The Last Jedi, The Rise of Skywalker)

Rewatching the 11 movies will give you a big picture overview of the Star Wars universe as it currently exists, and then you can decide which eras you want more content about (the Clone War era, the Empire era, the post-Empire era), if any. 

Option Two: Star Wars Movies + Live Action Shows

If you want to immerse yourself into ALL live action content of Star Wars, then the Disney+ shows are a great way to start. There was a surge in the Star Wars fandom when The Mandalorian (a live action show) first premiered back in 2019, and since then, five more live action shows had been created.

I recommend watching the live action shows interspersed among the movies. The shows build off the movie era they take place within, and they provide additional information and world building to their respective eras.

The shows that take place in the post-Empire era (after Return of the Jedi) are all connected. Characters in one show can be seen in another. So, to avoid spoilers, it's important to watch these shows in chronological order.

It’s important to note, however, that watching only the live action materials means you’ll be missing relevant information revealed in the animated shows. The animated shows are not necessary to understanding the big picture, but you might want to do some reading before you start the live action shows to make sure you know who the main players are and the general plot of what’s going on. 

Your watching order will be:

The Phantom Menace (movie) 

Attack of the Clones (movie)

Revenge of the Sith (movie)

Solo (movie)

Obi Wan Kenobi (live action show) 

Andor (live action show)

Rogue One (movie)

A New Hope (movie)

The Empire Strikes Back (movie)

Return of the Jedi (movie)

The Mandalorian Season 1 - 2 (live action show)

The Book of Boba Fett (live action show)

The Mandalorian Season 3 (live action show)

Ahsoka (live action show)

The Force Awakens (movie)

The Last Jedi (movie)

The Rise of Skywalker (movie)

The Acolyte (live action show)*

* The Acolyte show just finished airing last week. It takes place hundreds of years before The Phantom Menace. No other Star Wars media deals with the content and era seen in The Acolyte. If you’re interested in this era, you will need to get into the books and comics which delve into it more. Since I have not watched this show, I can’t make a recommendation of whether or not it’s necessary to understanding current Star Wars media. However, if you want to give it a shot, I would watch it last.

Option Three: Movies + Live Action Shows + Animated Shows

If you want to engage with ALL the Star Wars media content out there, you’ll need to buckle up for an intense ride. You will be combining all of the movies with the live actions and the animated shows. The animated shows have multiple seasons with 12-24 episodes each season.

Before you start watching the animated shows, it’s important to remember that these shows are intended for children audiences. They are kiddish at times. They are unserious. There are some dreadfully dull episodes (looking at the Droid Arc in S5 of TCW). However, ALL of the animated shows mature with each passing season, and they provide SO MUCH information that’s relevant and, frankly, pertinent to understanding the depths of Star Wars as a whole. If you’re able to overlook poor animation at times and a handful of cringey kiddish storylines, then the animated shows will payoff. They contain some of Star Wars best moments ever—from lightsaber fights to emotional deaths to gut-wrenching relationships. I will always recommend watching the animated shows.

The animated shows are also great for not only understanding the Star Wars universe but also navigating the fandom. The clone fandom, especially, has a big presence on Tumblr. (This is the fandom I'm part of and it's such a wonderful place!) You'll see lots of fanart and fanfics from this community alongside The Bad Batch community whose show just recently concluded a few months ago. If you like soldiers who respect women and emphasize loyalty, then you will enjoy the hell out of this fandom.

Here is the chronological watching order with movies, live action shows, and animated shows*:

The Phantom Menace (movie)

Attack of the Clones (movie)

The Clone Wars Movie (animated movie)

The Clone Wars (2008) (animated show)

Revenge of the Sith (movie)

The Bad Batch (animated show)

Solo (movie)

Obi Wan Kenobi (live action show)

Rebels (animated show)

Andor (live action show)

Rogue One (movie)

A New Hope (movie)

The Empire Strikes Back (movie)

Return of the Jedi (movie)

The Mandalorian Season 1 - 2 (live action show)

The Book of Boba Fett (live action show)

The Mandalorian Season 3 (live action show)

Ahsoka (live action show)

The Force Awakens (movie)

The Last Jedi (movie)

The Rise of Skywalker (movie)

The Acolyte (live action show)

* Please note that this viewing order is biased. I have excluded the animated shows Resistance and Visions. I didn’t enjoy either so I don’t recommend when watching. And since neither has proved itself pertinent to the Star Wars timeline, at the moment, they are not necessary to understanding the universe.

Option Four: The Live Action Shows

You've seen all 11 movies and now you want to jump into the live action shows. The live action shows build off the information provided in the movies and deep dive into certain eras. These eras are split into two: the Empire era and the post-Empire era.

The Obi Wan Kenobi show and the Andor show take place during the Empire era. The former has one season (it may have a future season but this hasn't been confirmed and the first season ends on a conclusive note). The latter has a second and final season that will be premiering either this year or next.

The Kenobi show is perfect for Obi Wan lovers who want to know what happened to him after Order 66. This explores Obi Wan's grief, his relationship with the twins, and his own encounters with his old apprentice.

The Andor show is perfect (my favorite of all the live actions) for those who want to get into the "dark side" of the Rebellion. Building off the less-than-ethical means of fighting we were introduced to in Rogue One, Andor continues this exploration of rebellion and the means required to fight against a fascist government. This is slower paced and darker but it's one of those shows that you have to rewatch because the little hints scattered throughout make more sense on a rewatch (and, if you're like me, it makes it even more exciting).

Now, if you want to know what happened during the post-Empire era--the era when the New Republic existed and prior to its eventual collapse to the First Order--then The Mandalorian, The Book of Boba Fett, and Ahsoka are the shows for you. These three shows are interconnected. Pay attention to the watching order below.

The Mandalorian relies on information and characters explored in both The Clone Wars (animated show) and Rebels (animated show). However, you can understand its storyline fairly well without these shows as background. You might have to do some research, though, especially when it comes to the third season. The third season lacks background information and expects you to know its major players from prior knowledge.

The Book of Boba Fett is to be watched immediately after The Mandalorian Season 2 and before Season 3. It's one season and most likely, due to the backlash it received, will not have a second season. Warning: If you're a big fan of cold-blooded, bounty hunter Boba Fett, this show will disappoint. Lower your expectations.

The Ahsoka show builds off the two previously stated shows but is also heavily influenced by Rebels (animated show). If you do not watch Rebels, you will need to do some extensive research on characters and plot lines in order to understand the main objective of the show.

Watching order:

The Mandalorian Season 1 - 2 (live action show)

The Book of Boba Fett (live action show)

The Mandalorian Season 3 (live action show)

Ahsoka (live action show)

Option Five: The Animated Shows

The animated shows are the spine to Star Wars. They provide so much information, character development, and plot explanation for the Clone War and Empire era.

The Clone Wars (2008 animated show) is one of the most popular pieces in Star Wars media. It has seven seasons and it follows the storylines of both Jedi and the clone troopers who fought alongside the Jedi. It's a devastating show but the characters introduced and explored are complex. If you want to watch this show, I would recommend watching the dreaded The Clone Wars movie before. It's not necessary to viewing but it does introduce the main characters of The Clone Wars. If you decide to skip it (totally understandable), I would read a summary on it. The later seasons (seasons 3 - 7) are much darker, more intense, and more heartbreaking. If you're struggling to enjoy the first two seasons, push through to the third (or skip to the third). That's where the story really starts and, if you don't like that season, then you can dip out knowing that it's not the show for you.

The Bad Batch just concluded a few months ago and it's well-lauded like The Clone Wars. It's set immediately after Order 66 and its follows a group of rogue clones as they find purpose and make their own life during a fraught time period when they're being hunted down. If you like the clones and want more clone-centric content, then this show is the perfect follow-up to TCW. (It also stars Omega--a young girl who grows into herself and steals your heart.)

Finally, Rebels takes place in the Empire era as well. Some of its characters are seen in TBB. Unlike TCW and TBB, Rebels gets a bad rep for its poor animation and its kiddish tendencies. The first two seasons, especially, are difficult to watch. However, the last two seasons are much more mature and the storyline becomes intense. The final season is one of the strongest single seasons Star Wars has produced. This show follows a found family of rebel fighters trying to make a small difference in the galaxy and whose Jedi members become responsible for more than they were expecting. It's emotional and it's affecting future Star Wars projects, especially upcoming live action storylines. If you choose to skip Rebels, I would watch the final season or read an extensive summary on it in order to understand what's coming.

Your watching order:

The Clone Wars Movie (animated movie)

The Clone Wars (2008) (animated show)

The Bad Batch (animated show)

Rebels (animated show)

Option Six: The Live Action + Animated Shows

You've watched all the movies and now you want to watch all the shows (excluding the three shows that I haven't seen/don't recommend). Watching the live action shows + the animated shows is the best way to immerse yourself in the Star Wars universe. And after you've watched the shows, then you can dive into the books (which provide even MORE information to the universe as a whole!).

Here is your watching order:

The Clone Wars Movie (animated movie)

The Clone Wars (2008) (animated show)

The Bad Batch (animated show)

Obi Wan Kenobi (live action show)

Rebels (animated show)

Andor (live action show)

The Mandalorian Season 1 - 2 (live action show)

The Book of Boba Fett (live action show)

The Mandalorian Season 3 (live action show)

Ahsoka (live action show)

The Acolyte (live action show)

There’s A LOT of media content with Star Wars right now. It can be very overwhelming! Let me know if you ever decide to get back into the fandom! Obviously it has its toxic sides but the fandom on Tumblr is fairly welcoming and kind. And if you have any questions, let me know. I’d be happy to talk :) 

[vaspider]

I knew that Andor had managed to truly capture the banality of evil when they put wannabefash mctryhard, whatever his name is, in the Imperial Cube Farm, and they pulled back and showed how big that fucking cube farm was, and I legitimately had a panic attack bc I felt like I was drowning in working in the financial sector again and trying so hard to do the best I could for every person whose mortgage I touched but knowing that the deck was stacked against me and nothing I did was going to change the world or make the predatory shit stop, and they were draining away my health and life and making me complicit in their shit bc like Wells Fargo literally has a whole division about investing in military shit, like every major bank does, and everyone who touches a major bank is helping them fund the massive fraud that is the US military even if we don't consent to it and we don't really have a choice, barely even the illusion of choice

Anyway, that scene had very effective cinematography.

[notasapleasure]

The Saga of the Coal-biter and the Skraeling

Medieval Icelandic saga AU for Cassian Andor/Brasso the Ferrixian, pre-canon/backstory, M, multichap (completed; updating with ~10 chapters weekly, currently 31/45)

The wolf was small and brown, it looked skinny, and it bared its teeth whenever I looked in its direction. I thought it was waiting to rush in and finish me off just as soon as I got myself free of the fighting bulls, but when it moved and its teeth began to snap meaningfully against the air, I realised it was trying to attack the bulls, to drive them away from me. It didn't let up until the grey bull grew distracted and the black one landed a killer strike. Then the wolf turned on the black bull, and as I lay in the mud, shaking and confused, another animal I had never seen in person joined the brawl - a tall, dark bear, swiping its paws at the remaining bull as the wolf lunged at its neck. The two of them brought it down, and I watched the whole thing without moving, until the bear and the wolf, victorious, their pelts matted with blood, turned to regard me. The wolf gave a snort and I flinched, but the two animals seemed to agree their job was done. They turned and headed towards the gate that led out of the home field together, two unlikely, foreign predators walking shoulder to shoulder.

[classicanalyzer]

The Acolyte - Lost/Found and Revenge/Justice Thoughts

"The Jedi live in a dream. A dream they believe everyone shares. If you attack a Jedi with a weapon, you will fail. Steel or laser are no threat to them. But an Acolyte...An Acolyte kills without a weapon. An Acolyte... kills the dream." Stranger Dark Side user

Lost/Found

I totally guessed that Indara would bite the dust based on how little we saw her in the trailers.

While Mae is cruel for her goal, she isn’t heartless when she spares the bartender after she sees his kid.

I'm so glad the Neimodian voices are not the racist accents from the PT in this show (though I will admit after hearing those voices for so long and in the iconic memes, it feels weird to hear non-racist voices...but nonetheless it's very good it's not present). I applaud Lucasfilm for doing this. Also my shameless advertising of Brotherhood, that book did a lot of justice to the Neimodian race. It's also just an amazing SW novel in general.

I love Sol and Osha a lot. Sol (played by Lee Jung-jae who did an amazing job at portraying Sol, he even learned English for the show! I'm so happy to see a great Korean Jedi Master. I feel represented and it's a great feeling) truly represents the best of the Jedi and is clearly disturbed by the direction of the Jedi Order's current path. I also like how Osha despite no longer being a Jedi still holds out for the best of them. Her funny banter with Pip also gives her some levity in an otherwise dark story.

Yord represents the dogma of the future PT Jedi Order while Jecki represents the emotion suppression of the PT Jedi. However, I like how the two just like Sol quickly caught on that Mae is definitely alive and is doing the crimes when Sol told them about her.

The Polan is such an amazing ship design and I love the Hyperspace ring-based craft that carried it.

I very much appreciate that Sol believed her rather even hesitating for a moment. It shows how much Sol is different from the other Jedi who were more ready to place judgment on Osha.

We also see the beginnings of the Jedi Order of the HR Era to the PT Era with the Jedi becoming concerned with emotions leading to attachment (ironically missing the point that emotions can also make people stronger through their bonds but they must make sure emotions don't lead to attachment) and their reputation to the greater public. Even visually, the Jedi Temple of the HR Era is shown to be much higher than the Temple in the PT Era where the levels of Coruscant expanded upwards kinda pulling the Jedi down.

The production value behind this show is simply incredible. All the practical sets and on-site location shooting are present. I love seeing the diverse array of aliens in this show including a Zygerrian Jedi (we also got a prominent one in the HR Era comics as well). As much as I love Andor a lot, I will admit that the lack of aliens in that show is noticeable.

I also absolutely love the Dark Side figurer's speech to the Acolyte at the end of the episode.

Revenge/Justice

I really like how Sol is concerned about Osha falling to a dark side. With what is implied with Torbin's vague last statement, there's something bigger with Sol's concerns for Osha and desire to help Mae beyond failing them both.

Qimir is a squirmy little vendor. I feel there might be more to the guy than we think.

Master Torbin killing himself was one of the most unexpected dark turns I didn't see coming. I get a feeling the four Jedi might've been involved in the destruction of the Aniesya twins family although I highly doubt they were personally involved in the destruction but might've accidentally led to it.

I also love how the HR Jedi that Mae targets never attack her (except for Indura who decided to finally use her Lightsaber). The entire time Sol was fitting Mae he was more focused on asking her and disarming her weapons. A true Jedi never attacks first but to disarm and to try to prevent a conflict by non-violent means first.

Also very interesting that Mae didn't know Osha was alive. It's going to be quite an interesting conversation between Mae and her master when they reunite. That look when Mae finally sees her sister alive is amazing acting (you almost forget that they're portrayed by the same person which is how great Amandla Stenberg, Osha and Mae's actress, is).

I can't wait to figure out what's Kelnacca's deal next week.

The music done by Michael Abels is phenomenal and I cannot wait to analyze more into the score once the soundtrack comes out.

Overall, I really love this show. Leslye Headland and her team absolutely cooked and I need to talk more about the mysterious Dark Side figure's speech and how it related to their plan in the show.

[tarisilmarwen]

Rebels Rewatch: "Secret Cargo"

Mon Mothma is a badass, that is all.

Hello another one of my husband's favorite episodes.

So much story expressed in just body language and establishing shots. The Ghost is waiting--apparently they've been there a while if they're willingly listening to holonet news--and they're all anxious and bored.

So the Ghorman Massacre, if previous Legends canon still holds, is that incident I mentioned way back when, when Tarkin landed a Star Destroyer on top of a group of protestors, implicitly with Palpatine's permission.

And can we just admire the sheer balls on this woman? Mon makes this pretty speech in the Senate chamber while it's in session.

Meaning she called Palpatine a "lying executioner" to his face.

Legends canon also holds that right after this, she personally hand-delivered the Declaration of Rebellion to his desk.

Yeah. I love her.

Heeeeeey good thing they established how utterly creepy these droids were back in "Warhead" because I see it and now I'm filled with dread.

The sound design for these things is still excellent.

Love how Ezra can tell different dialects of Binary apart in order to know the probe "speaks Imperial". He be learning behind the scenes yo.

(In more ways than one, as we'll soon find out.)

The way they draw out this suspense as the probe makes another round is great, quick teamwork and fast reflexes almost had the thing once it was within range.

Intense Ezra is intense. :)

The Ghost takes in a Y-wing in yet another cool utilization of its cargo hold.

Too bad these pilots are ungrateful. "You're making things harder for all of us!" Awwww boo hoo is the tyrannical authoritarian government getting even more tyrannical and authoritarian because it's finally being pushed back against? That's an occupational hazard, people. You're in a rebellion, it's not going to be cake and ice cream.

"It would have been prudent to avoid detection, as ordered." The probe was literally on top of them looking in their windshield, I think it was long past having detected them.

But enough griping about Gold Squadron's backseat rebellion-ing, let's get some more action!

One of the Y-wing pilots conveniently gets taken out so Ezra can take their place and I love this expression from Gold Leader:

He's just like, "Really? This upstart kid?"

But Hera has complete faith in him, awww.

Ezra looks really good in a Y-wing helmet. I don't think he keeps this one, he only seems to collect Imperial helmets.

*ANGELIC CHORUS*

Faslfhaksjfh pretty sure fandom winced when Ezra said the cursed line but! In this case nothing bad happened. Guess we broke the curse.

And now we learn just why the Rebellion loved using Y-wings so much. Two attacks from two fighters and they absolutely cripple this light cruiser.

His face is too pure sometimes. T_T

I really like how Mon is characterized here, Rebels really leans into her Paragon qualities. She sounds like a woman who's tried her best and is finally fed up, and you absolutely believe in her capacity as a Rebel leader. I think one of the reasons I'm reluctant to watch Andor is how they handle Mon. I'm not really a fan of "graying" my heroes.

Dantooine namedrop!

Four Star Destroyers hovering over Capital City now, come on guys that's excessive.

The beginning notes of Thrawn's leitmotif play softly here, in glockenspiel it sounds like, before switching to the iconic organs. As a side note, since they have Kiner for the Ahsoka show please please let there be some theme carryover from the show.

Thrawn already knows Hera's tactics well enough to deduce where she's going to go; through a risky, little-used smugglers corridor in a nebula. Him sending Pryce and Konstantine to head her off I don't actually think was him setting them up to fail, because for all intents and purposes they had the Ghost dead to rights, Hera was just a bit too creative and clever and managed to slip free.

Why is this show so good at coll menacing shots for Thrawn?

Mon speaking to another one of the archthemes of Star Wars: When to keep fighting inside a flawed system versus when to break from it and burn it all down. There's no real easy or right answer. Bail, and Padme, and Mon worked for years within the system, both of the Republic and the Empire, trying to change it from the inside. The Republic, for all its flaws and problems, could have been salvaged if enough people cared enough to fight for it, and absent Palpatine's influence of course. The Empire on the other hand, is rotten to the core, from the top down, the entire hierarchy and infrastructure designed to deprive its citizens of rights and due process and basic freedoms and control them under an oppressive hand.

Which isn't to say that continuing to fight against the Empire's rule from the inside, in the government halls rather than on the streets, was a worthless endeavor. Not all political conflicts can be solved by direct action. But it does take wise discernment to know when to start openly opposing a corrupt system.

Mon has apparently reached that breaking point.

This whole conversation is just... nice.

Hello yes, someone order some fresh scenery porn?

Ezra gushing about how Hera's "the best around" awww.

The Empire shows up, Vult Skerris now shoved in a TIE Defender, as if he wasn't a hassle enough in a regular TIE, and Ezra tries to warn the others about the Defender to no avail, we lose a couple redshirts.

This music cue is gorgeous, the animation on the nebula is gorgeous, I know I'm not being super verbose this rewatch but this episode is just so nice.

The way the Interceptors just melt, the bits that peel off the Ghost...

This music cue is much more relaxed than the wailing chorus at the end of "Journey Into The Star Cluster", more like a track you'd hear in a nature documentary, maintaining its sense of subtle awe and wonder even as a danger is narrowly escaped.

Love that Mon immediately knows she needs to stall for time so that Hera can think up something. She's fitting into the Rebellion already, knows her people well. :)

Also hilarious how her stalling tactic is a laundry-list of political demands.

LOL Chopper rolling along the floor there.

Ezra being an actually really decent pilot (because Hera taught him) and taking care of business. <3

Hera's face when she hears Ezra. <3

Sabine would have loved Hera's tactic here.

SCORCHED.

Dantooine be pretty.

[CIRCLE HIGHLIGHTS THE PART IN MON'S SPEECH ABOUT AUTHORITARIANS STIFLING FREEDOM IN THE NAME OF "SAFETY", POINTS EMPHATICALLY.]

Rebels said beware tyrants trying to control you for your own (or "the greater") good.

This whole ending bit is just so... optimistic. There's a sense of hope and heroism, of dawn breaking after a long night. Things are clear cut, there is evil and we must stand against it.

And finally the true Rebel Alliance is born. :)

Ahhhhhhhh I love this episode I love it, it feels almost chill in pacing and tone but that sense of clarity of purpose, that OT feel, it's just beautiful, this is just a pleasant episode.

Even knowing what happens in the finale can't fully dampen the spirit of this one.

[iviarellereads]

The Shadow Rising, Chapter 17 - Deceptions

(THIS PROJECT IS SPOILER FREE! No spoilers past the chapter you click on. Curious what I'm doing here? Read this post! For the link index and a primer on The Wheel of Time, read this one! Like what you see? Send me a Ko-Fi.)

(Harp icon) In which, hi again, bye forever.

PERSPECTIVE: Thom is gleeman-ing to raise spirits after the Trolloc attack, and planting rumours about the High Lords possibly plotting against Rand. He thinks about how he's really starting to feel his age, especially with his limp, as he walks into his room... to find Moiraine going through the papers on his table, as if she has every right to be there. Thom thinks she's beautiful and graceful, and she laughs at his quips, but calls himself an old fool and too tired to think straight.

He's so tired he doesn't even remember if he left anything incriminating anywhere. They exchange pleasantries, and Moiraine touches Thom's knee. He feels a tingle, and she says she wishes a good healer had been nearby when it happened. Thom says a dozen may not have been enough, given a Fade did it. Moiraine says she knows, and Thom wonders how much else she knows. He notices the injury feels a little better than it did before, and gets grumpy that he didn't even ask her to look at it, wondering what she's after.

Mo brings up a High Lord's death, and another's rapid illness, and he realizes she knows he's been sowing plots, playing the Game of Houses. Moiraine adds that it seems the two led the faction that would have tried to kill Rand. Thom plays like he's just a simple gleeman, and Moiraine brings up that he was the Court Bard at Caemlyn for a time, and Morgase's lover after Taringail Damodred's death. She knows that Taringail had been planning for Morgase to die, and for himself to ascend as Andor's first king.(1) She says the Thomdril Merrilin she's heard tales of could play the Game of Houses in his sleep, saying it's a shame such a man calls himself a simple gleeman, and such arrogance to keep the same name.

Thom counters that, speaking of names, it's remarkable how much you can learn about a person from one. Take Moiraine Damodred, of the House Damodred in Cairhien. Taringail's youngest half-sister, the late King Laman's niece. And, Aes Sedai aiding the Dragon Reborn since before she could have known who he was. News of such things could shake the world, maybe it's best that a simple gleeman stays tucked away in servants' quarters.

Mo says she doesn't use her house name because the Damodreds had a bad rep before Laman started the Aiel War, with good reason. Thom, annoyed he can't ruffle her feathers, asks right out what she wants. Moiraine says Nyn and El leave for Tanchico today, a very dangerous city. Thom's knowledge might keep them alive.

Thom interprets this as wanting to separate him from Rand, and says he's too old for that sort of thing, he's thinking of taking up farming. Moiraine says a quiet life might actually kill Thom, sounding amused. But, she can guarantee, under the First Oath, that Tanchico will not kill him.

He frowns at her, wondering how she can possibly know that.(2) He asks why he should go to Tanchico, and Moiraine says he could protect Morgase's daughter. Thom says he hardly knew her when he left Caemlyn, so Moiraine breaks out her trick card: she knows about his nephew, Owyn. The Red Ajah should have brought him to the Tower for the process of gentling, but they did it in situ and left him to die. On purpose. Thom asks why she's telling him this, and she says she wouldn't have, if he'd agreed earlier. If he goes to Tanchico, next time they meet she can give him the names of the Red sisters who did the deed, and the one who gave them their orders.(3) And they will meet again, he will survive Tarabon.

Thom asks her to leave, and she says she will prove to him that not all Aes Sedai are like the ones who did this. He asks her again, and she leaves. He sinks to his knees, and thinks it all through, cursing Moiraine for backing him into such a corner.

PERSPECTIVE: Min has been taken under the wing of the Mistress of the Kitchens, Laras, and taken up embroidery as an excuse to sit in one place and watch people for long periods of time, though she’s no good at it.

Gawyn and Galad sneak up on her, but only Gawyn knows her, because of their prior encounter. Galad doesn't recognize her at all, with the longer hair in curls, the dress, and all the makeup. Gawyn asks her to read a passage from a book and tell Galad that it's nonsense. It's a book about the Way of the Light, like a Whitecloak manifesto. Min pretends to not understand it, and comments she means to read books, but her hair takes hours to get right, don't you like it?

Gawyn says it can't be good if the Whitecloaks follow it, and Galad says the author was a great man, even if the Children of the Light have been excessive sometimes since their founding. Min says she can't imagine a Whitecloak dancing, and the Aes Sedai don't seem to care for it either, does Gawyn think there's much chance of a dance here? Gawyn is fuming with frustration, but Galad offers to escort her to a dance in the city, if he hears of a suitable one, and smiles at Min.(4)

Gawyn changes the subject and says he sees the Amyrlin speaking to Min every day, has she mentioned his sister or Egg? Min says the Amyrlin checks on her often, to see if she's closer to a decision. Did he say his sister? No, she's never mentioned the Daughter-Heir. Who was the other name? Galad says they shouldn't bother ~Mistress Elmindreda~ with all that.

Min misses the rest of what he says because she's spotted Logain, wandering aimlessly through a garden, with an Accepted as his companion (mostly to stop him from killing himself or escaping) and sees a flaring halo around his head, gold and blue. It means glory and power, but his glory should be behind him, in his false Dragon days.(5)

Gawyn pities Logain, Galad can't because of the thousands of people who died under or because of him. Min excuses herself abruptly, but Gawyn follows her, offering to carry her basket. She tells him off for mentioning El and Egg in front of Galad, Elmindreda doesn't know or care about them. Gawyn's just worried, especially with another false Dragon in Tear. Min proposes that he might not be false this time, but Gawyn will believe it when he sees it.

Min tells Gawyn to trust the Amyrlin, and he says fine, but did you know Galad's been drinking in taverns with Whitecloaks? Not more than a cup or two, but drinking and talking. Eamon Valda himself gave that book to Galad.

Gawyn asks Min to tell him if she learns anything about El or Egg, and she says she will, but qualifies it in her thoughts: she will if she can, if it's safe for them. She wishes she could go back to Rand. She leaves Gawyn and makes her way to the Amyrlin's study. The new vision of Logain is too important to wait, though they're supposed to be careful about meeting.

Siuan takes the news in stride, as much as one can. Starvation in Cairhien, a sister missing in Tarabon, Trolloc raids in the Borderlands again, someone calling himself the Prophet stirring up riots in Ghealdan. War in Arad Doman has stopped trade from Saldaea, causing further unrest in Maradon.

Siuan asks why Min rushed up here, and Min says, because nothing she's seen since that first day she arrived has been important at all. She feels useless. Siuan says one day Min's visions will draw her a map to the Black Ajah, and pay more than enough for their passage.

Min asks Siuan to tell the princes something closer to the truth than the farm story. Siuan asks if she should change her story after all this time. Min says Siuan doesn't even know if they're in trouble, does she? Siuan suggests Min assume that Rand is fine until they hear otherwise.

Some messages arrive, and Leane reads one. Siuan expects more news of Trollocs, but almost as bad, Mazrim Taim has escaped, and two sisters are dead. They make arrangements to hunt him back down and gentle him on the spot. Siuan reads the other message, and it's news of Rand: he holds Callandor. Now she can convene the Hall of the Tower and announce that the Dragon has truly been reborn, and the Tower must support and guide him. She can finally work openly.

PERSPECTIVE: Sahra Covenry, the novice who had escorted Min to the Amyrlin's study. She's working at a farm, and thinks it's so unfair, she didn't do anything.

An unnamed Aes Sedai approaches Sahra and demands to know everything she heard or saw about Elmindreda.

“But I heard nothing, Aes Sedai. The Keeper sent me away as soon as—” Pain racked her, digging her toes into the dirt, arching her back; the spasm lasted only moments, but it seemed eternal. Struggling for breath, she realized her cheek was pressed to the ground, and her still trembling fingers dug into the soil. She did not remember falling. She could see Mistress Elward’s laundry basket lying on its side near the stone farmhouse, damp linens spilled out in a heap. Dazed, she thought that that was odd; Moria Elward would never leave her washing lying like that. “Everything, girl,” the Aes Sedai said coldly. She was standing over Sahra now, making no move to help her. She had hurt her; it was not supposed to be that way. “Every person this Elmindreda spoke to, every word she said, every nuance and expression.” “She spoke to Lord Gawyn, Aes Sedai,” Sahra sobbed into the earth. “That is all I know, Aes Sedai. All.” She began to weep in earnest, sure that was not enough to satisfy this woman. She was right. She did not stop screaming for a long time, and when the Aes Sedai left there was not a sound around the farmhouse except for the chickens, not even breathing.(6)

=====

(1) And she knows that Thom killed her pain in the ass of a brother, just as he killed the High Lords. (2) Just how does Moiraine know that Thom will survive going to Tarabon, so firmly that she can say it plainly, bound by the First Oath, to never speak any word that is untrue? And why is she so insistent on proving to Thom that hashtag Not All Aes Sedai? (Those of you with shipper goggles might also remember another odd comment of hers recently about the face of her husband. They've only interacted about three times, but if the rest of this conversation didn't read like flirting in political jargon, I dunno what to tell ya.) (3) This is ALSO the first time we've heard that the Aes Sedai, and the Red Ajah in particular, have done anything wrong with regard to handling men who can channel. Funny that Moiraine says they shouldn't have been allowed to do what they did, when her bestest friend in the world orders similar actions in the same chapter. (Siuan doesn't suggest leaving Taim to his followers or home village, but still.) (4) Min isn't very good at playing an airhead, but then, people don't expect much of airheads, so she gets by. Poor girl still feels drawn back to Rand, though. Sorry, he's headed into the Aiel Waste, you won't see him for a while yet, even if Siuan let you go. (5) What could that mean? Well, let's think: why would Logain continue to appear in the story past the first book? This is RJ's way of reminding us that Logain exists, and more, he's still got some part to play. (6) And poor Sahra didn't deserve that ending, but here we are. Who do you think that Aes Sedai might have been?

[butterflydm]

wot reread: towers of midnight (chap 27-38)

spoilers for towers of midnight

This gritted teeth reluctance of Egwene's, where she knows that they can't afford to face the Seanchan now because the Last Battle is more important -- this is the vibe. This is the energy. We need more of this when talking about the Seanchan.

2. Anyway, Egwene is trying to reach out to Rand's allies to convince them that he needs to be convinced to stop his plan of breaking the seals. This section works better than the earlier ones imo because Darlin, etc. doesn't know about the big epiphany and Rand's shift in perspective, so instead of another person reassuring Egwene that Rand is ~much better now~, we get a more measured response that talks about loyalty, and the Seanchan to the west, and that they all knew that the Dragon Reborn would likely go mad before the Last Battle so this shouldn't really be a surprise and he's still the only horse in the race.

3. They receive word that the watchtowers of the Borderlands are beginning to go dark -- a sign that the Last Battle is truly beginning. Egwene learns that the Hall is meeting without her, and goes to the meeting. After some Aes Sedai political wrangling, Egwene manages to get them to trade authority over the armies with authority in dealing with monarchs and rulers, aka Rand, who rules Illian. She also does some important loophole closing to make it harder for another secretive group like the Black Ajah to depose an Amrylin as happened to Siuan.

4. There is a certain amount of hilarious irony in Faile being hurt over Morgase using a different name and hiding her noble identity given the way Faile entered into this story (though Faile does realize this herself after a moment). But then she admits to herself that her real worry is that Morgase, as a fair woman, might fairly decide that Perrin really is a murderer, and they would have to deal with the consequences of that decision.

5. While a bubble of evil attacks Perrin's camp, Morgase and Galad are talking off in the Whitecloak camp. Morgase thinks about how she wishes she'd done a better job teaching Galad about shades of gray, so perhaps he wouldn't have been drawn into the Children of Light, with their black and white philosophy. She does her best to impart some shades of gray teachings to him now: good people can make mistakes sometimes and that's as important as knowing if a crime itself happened (basically that intent does matter when judging for a crime). She does not quite convince him, because... idk we need to draw out Perrin's plot more I guess. And the bubble of evil means that Perrin is asking for more time on his side too.

6. Okay, so Tam hasn't left at this point. But Perrin has been casually talking about how Elayne is planning to marry Rand*, which means it should be buzzing around the camp as gossip, which means that Tam should already know about Elayne when he first meets Min in Tear. There was zero indication about this in the Tam scenes in TGS but since it seems obvious that Tam should already know, I'm going to imagine/pretend that he talked to either Min or zen!Rand (once he returned) about these rumors about the queen of Andor wanting to marry Rand.

Anyway, Tam tells Perrin that he needs to leave on special ~Aes Sedai business~ but that he's proud of him. I guess that's nice. And then he leaves, off to go be in the ending of TGS and nearly get killed by his son. So that's where Perrin is in the timeline.

*this really does illustrate how infrequently Perrin thinks of Rand and how quickly he manages to dispel his visions of Rand compared to Mat, since he apparently has NOT been watching Rand constantly having sex with Min in recent months -- or maybe the ~Pattern~ just knows that Mat is more interested in seeing Rand during those times than Perrin is? Because Perrin actually DOES know Min and Elayne both separately -- he spent that winter between TGH & TDR spending a lot of time with Min and she even confessed to him that she was fated to fall in love with Rand (though didn't know if he would love her back), and he was in Tear when Elayne and Rand were together as well -- so you'd think that he'd consider what it might mean for Elayne's marriage hopes that Min stole her boyfriend, since he doesn't know about the shared love confessions, yet the only thing he mentioned as a potential objection to the marriage is that Rand might be too busy ~conquering his next nation~. I mean, I guess he could have been making poly assumptions but that's really the sort of thing that maybe should have actually been in his thoughts at some point, lol.

7. Haha, Elayne finding a loophole in the "required bed rest for a week" rule laid down by her midwife. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 ilu Elayne. Anyway, she's here to see a demonstration of Aludra's dragons! It's interesting that Mat explained to Elayne that Aludra's main motivation is to get revenge against the Seanchan, which potentially means that he told her about the Seanchan destroying the Tanchico chapterhouse and murdering & enslaving the Illuminators there. But, yes, the first public demonstration of the 'dragons' (aka cannons) is a success. After agreeing to give her all the resources that she requires, Elayne makes Aludra swear that she will keep the creation of these a secret, but Birgitte feels anxious about the idea of them anyway. "The world just changed."

8. Perrin's crash course in How To Wolfbrother: Dream Edition continues. This time, he's learning how not to be afraid of himself as Young Bull and how to confidently control the wolf dream around him when he's inside it. Over a handful of days. This is the first time Perrin finds out that this is the dreamplace of 'everyone' and not just wolf-related people. Hopper brings Perrin to a city so that he can walk through the 'fear dreams' of the people living there, so that he can do an accelerated crash course in How To Wolfbrother. And I do find all this wolf-development good but... wow, it feels so belated. Mat got his war memories in TSR and struggled with them over the course of TFoH but had basically accepted them by LoC. Perrin found out he was a wolfbrother in EotW and is only now finishing up his coursework in How To Wolfbrother.

9. It's interesting that the wolves are waiting on Dragonmount for Rand to face his moment of decision between destruction and life. We've only had hints of how connected the wolves feel to the Light & to the Dragon Reborn. Kinda wish we'd gotten more. One of the downsides of how Jordan kept dividing up the storylines and separating everyone, I suppose, plus the general theme of Team Light having rotten communication skills and keeping secrets from each other.

I really do feel like Sanderson rushed Rand too much in TGS and then idled with him in ToM and I think it would have worked better to have the ruthless Rand arc paced out more with the other characters in ToM rather than climaxing at the end of TGS. I'm also kinda... eh on whether or not we needed Perrin there ~in spirit~ with Rand on Dragonmount? I'm not sure we needed an outside PoV of this scene when we had an internal one already? I like the descriptions well enough but I am tired of always seeing Rand from the outside in ToM. But, anyway, Rand chooses life and the wolves all celebrate. It's kinda funny that the wolves are so into Rand and he... barely has any clue that wolves are related to the Last Battle in any way? I don't think anyone (Perrin) has mentioned that he's a celebrity to the wolves.

10. I am more than halfway done with ToM and I feel like barely anything has happened yet, lol. "Let's all catch up to Rand's moment of being awesome" didn't work for CoT and I'm not sure why Sanderson decided to repeat that again for ToM. There are definitely some chapters and PoVs that I am enjoying but overall this book feels like filler half the time, which is a WILD choice, bro.

11. Mat is dicing, and it seems to partly be a vibe check to see if his luck is with him (see, this is what I meant earlier about how Elayne's supernatural guarantee is more guaranteed than Mat's is). Strike nine-point-three as Mat notices the wide smile of a "raven-haired beauty". He is now preemptively telling (some) women that he's married in hopes that they will do the work of not being flirty rather than him doing it. Strike ten-point-three, as Mat regretfully thinks about how the innkeeper's wife is very pretty but her husband would assault him if he looked at her for too long so he only glances at her briefly.

12. He's been walking around with his face uncovered all day, hoping to draw the gholam to him now that he has a plan on how to deal with it. It works after a while and the two of them fight (in streets that are being kept clear by the Band keeping other people away). The gholam is able to get his medallion away from him, but Mat has borrowed two of the copies from Elayne and discovers that they still work against the gholam. Ah, and the secret weapon is finding a way to trick it/back it into falling into the Gateway created by one of the Kin. This is a good chapter, for the most part, except for some minor things here and there, that are mostly annoyances that were pre-baked into Mat's new characterization from Jordan in CoT & KoD. The gholam thing unfortunately does feel like it turned more into a personal vendetta, which I think is a shame, but I'm glad that channeling was an essential part of defeating it. Mat has, since parting from his slaver wife, now worked extensively with free channelers -- Teslyn saved his life against the gholam before, and it's Elayne connecting him to the Kin (who had to escape Altara to avoid being enslaved by his wife's people) that saves him here and helps him defeat the gholam.

13. Strike eleven-point-three as Mat notes one of the Kinswomen who is plump and pretty and would "fit nicely on his knee".

14. Yikes on bikes that Mat wants to give a slaver, who is hostile to channelers and who wants to torture and enslave them, a medallion that would protect her against channeling (though this plan of his does make an asshole move that Tuon pulls later somewhat ironic). Though he isn't aware of the copies' flaws, it sounds like, and one of those flaws is that they protect against some weaves but not against the most powerful, so Elayne could, for example, still balefire Tuon's ass if she were wearing one of the copies.

Also, I bet that Mat did NOT tell Elayne that he was planning to give her hard work to a slaver who would be willing to torture, degrade, and mind-break her if given the chance. Honestly, once Elayne does find out who Mat is married to, she has every right to feel completely betrayed by him. He used her to aid someone who would be willing to torture her and the people under her protection. And he's so deeply in denial about Tuon (thinking of her ~as a person~ as completely separate from her position ~as a powerful enforcer of slavery in a slaver society~ and behaving as if 'protecting Tuon' doesn't support the Seanchan Empire in any way -- this is the bullshit that his "your empire is my enemy but you aren't" double-thinking allows to him to believe despite it being nonsense) that it doesn't even occur to him that what he's doing here is a complete betrayal of the trust that Elayne has placed in him. And after Elayne saved his ass here too -- both with the copies of the medallion, and also because she and Birgitte are the ones who came up with this plan for him.

...I wonder if the medallion copies would prevent a sul'dam from using an a'dam, since (unlike the original) they do not allow the wearer to channel while wearing them. It seems logical that they would block the link created by the a'dam.

15. Anyway, Mat is basically pulling the exact same "I am on both sides and neither at once" routine with Tuon & the Westlanders that Gawyn pulled with the loyalist Aes Sedai and Egwene, so I can only hope that this means that Mat will come to his senses post-canon the way that Gawyn came to his senses and picked the right side once he learned that Egwene was imprisoned by the White Tower. There are a few easy ways that a post-canon narrative could make that happen.

Honestly, it's more likely that Tuon will grossly violate Mat's sense of morality past the bounds of what he can take than that she won't, given what we've seen of her personality and beliefs. If they have multiple kids in the future and Tuon raises them in the Imperial Seanchan way, Mat will rebel against having his kids sabotage and undermine each other to attempts to appeal to empress dearest; if he sees someone in a collar that he recognizes than this may bring things home to him in a way that it seems like he's forcing himself to ignore when the slaves are all strangers; if they have a channeler kid who Tuon tries to collar, etc. Lots of things could cross the line, and all of those things seem perfectly in her character as has been shown thus far in the books.

The interesting thing to me here is that Mat gets to fence-straddle without getting the fandom hate that Gawyn got for it. Is it simply because the reader got to know Mat for much longer before he started his fence-straddling ways in CoT? Is it because Mat has a more amusing internal narration so people are willing to forgive him for more than they would other characters? Is it because of who gets hurt because of the fence-straddling?

Gawyn's fence-straddling meant that he didn't help Rand during/after Dumai's Wells and he also killed some number of Warders during the coup. Mat's fence-straddling means that so far he's been complicit in forty Aes Sedai getting enslaved by the Seanchan plus an unknown number of injuries and deaths, and he's currently plotting to give Tuon a tool that would help her enslave more Aes Sedai (even if he chooses to be in denial over the fact that she could use it that way).

16. General Bashere and his army finally arrive with Asha'man to give Ituralde some relief. Rand shows up too, a little bit later, and apologizes to Ituralde for how he has failed in making peace with the Seanchan and in giving him the support that he needed. Rand goes out alone to kill a massive wave of Shadowspawn by himself.

17. Rand processes that he was angry during the recent fight with the Shadowspawn... and that that's OKAY. He's allowed to be angry as long as he processes and controls that anger appropriately and doesn't lash out at his allies. Very important step!

lol we also get updated on Min's Old Tongue prophecy analysis project re: Callandor. It's... lol, whatever. I guess it gives Min something to do.

Once again, I wish so much that we were actually in Rand's head and not just getting him filtered through other people's PoVs.

18. So Nynaeve has given a full report of her time with Rand to the Amyrlin & Siuan (who is clearly still one of Egwene's main advisors at this point? She's the only person in the meeting with Egwene and Nynaeve). She is capable of communication, just not with Rand. *sigh*

Nynaeve defends Rand here against Egwene (she says that if the Asha'man's behavior is Rand's responsibility, then the Aes Sedai's behavior is Egwene's responsibility), but was never willing to tell him anything when she was with him. The rest of the scene is them sketching out their plan to take out Mesaana (using Egwene as bait again). Nynaeve suggests working with Rand, but Egwene shoots the idea down.

19. Gawyn is just... casually hanging out with Elayne in Caemlyn? We didn't actually get to see their reunion? Well, that's disappointing. Gawyn guesses that Rand is the father of Elayne's kids and she mentions that if he is, it would be smart not to tell anyone about it, as it would make them targets. Gawyn and Elayne talk some various things through re: Rand and Egwene and, in the end, Elayne helps Gawyn let go of his hate of Rand. She releases from his obligations in Caemlyn, so that he can fully devote himself to Egwene & the White Tower. It's a sweet scene, honestly. It gets quoted sometimes as Elayne doing a Take That at Gawyn over classism but that's not really the approach she's taking at all with him.

20. While he's here, he takes out the dagger that was dropped by the assassin and examines it, getting a started reaction from one of the nearby 'Kin', who is actually one of the ex-damane (Marille), who recognizes the dagger and what it means. He finds out that the Bloodknives are Seanchan assassins who are sent personally by the Empress. Suicide troops left behind to murder Aes Sedai, in this case. They've murdered several women already, and those deaths are also ones that Mat is complicit in. We get a reminder here that "the Seanchan treated their damane worse than animals" as Marille cowers and whimpers when Gawyn's voice raises.

(And Tuon would happily do this kind of emotional damage to Mat's sister Bode, or to Egwene, or Elayne, or Aviendha, or Nynaeve, or Moiraine, etc. -- though that does remind me of how it, in retrospect, it does seem like the composition of Mat's party that escaped Ebou Dar was another deliberate choice to shield Mat from the true horror of what the Seanchan do to these women -- he has never met an native Seanchan ex-damane, who has had to reconstruct herself from the ground up after having been taught since fifteen or sixteen years old that she is a subhuman monster. But having someone like that around during the circus journey would have been an even stronger indictment of Tuon as a person and of her society as a whole, so potentially that's why Jordan avoided it)

21. So GAWYN gets to hear the explanation here that all sul'dam are capable of learning to channel, something that no one has ever gotten around to telling Rand. Kaisea, the ex-sul'dam (who was also Low Blood, it sounds like) that Gawyn meets here, is insisting that she belongs in the collar now. If Elayne is so sure that it will undermine Seanchan culture for this news to spread, then it's baffling to me that she isn't spreading the news! This should be a major (deliberately planted) rumor, especially in cities and villages near or across the Seanchan border (it's entirely possible that this was originally part of Jordan's plan for the Seanchan, before he decided to slow-walk them starting in CoT, for the sake of the outriggers that will never happen).

Gaywn learns that the ter'angreal rings that the Bloodknives wear gives them the ability to blur near shadows but it comes at great cost -- once activated, death will come to them, usually in a couple of weeks and at a month at the longest. Around now is when he gets the message from Egwene to return to the Tower. Instead of doing so, he has the knife sent back, with the message that the assassin is Seanchan (and the details of how they work). Also, just as the Seanchan declare their army Ever Victorious (and their empress ~may she live forever~) they also say that the Bloodknives are impossible to survive if you're their target. You can always count on the Seanchan to declare that they are The Best and Most Perfect at everything, despite the evidence being against them. From what I've seen in the books, the only thing they're actually 'the best' at is propaganda (though both of those traits -- claiming to be superior and only really being superior at SAYING they're superior -- are pretty common for fascist-style governments, so I guess that's all true to form).

22. Perrin is STILL planning to disband the armies that he has gathered (after the trial, before he goes back to Rand). wtf dude! I don't care if you don't want to lead them; hand them over to Rand and HE can lead them. He has stopped complaining about leading them publicly, at least.

23. Perrin has figured out that there's a connection between the weird dome in the wolfdream and the inability of channelers to create Gateways in that same area in the waking world. Oops, there's a section here where Faile's PoV becomes Perrin's for a few paragraphs and then swaps back to Faile's, without the normal spacing markers that the books use for PoV swaps in the same chapter.

24. Conclusion of the trial: Perrin "killed unlawfully" but did not "murder" the Children of the Light, because the Children did not have authorization to act within Andor's borders, so Morgase is treating it as a clash between two mercenary bands. Then she throws the sentencing to Galad. Galad asks if Perrin will stand by the sentencing, Perrin says that he will... but only after the Last Battle. Galad agrees to those terms and says he will name the sentence itself later.

(in light of our Dain Bornhald casting news -- this is the culmination of his own series-long arc, where he learns and begins to believe that Perrin was not responsible for his father's death)

24. Tonight is the night that Egwene plans to face off with Mesaana in TAR. They have their trap set. Egwene also asks Silviana to send Gawyn another letter requesting his return but to make sure that she asks this time instead of telling. Egwene would probably have had more success if she'd written the letter herself, lol.

25. The frustrating thing about the Whitecloak trial being the trigger for Perrin's character arc climax here is how he has committed much worse deeds since then and not regretted them. I don't care about the results of his Whitecloak trial. I want him on trial for selling two hundred women into slavery! Anyway, he's heading into the wolfdream to try to kill Slayer, while Faile is in charge of handling the retreat through the Gateways in the waking world. He isn't able to kill Slayer, but he finds the dreamspike that was being used to prevent Traveling and starts traveling north with it, so that his people will be able to leave.

26. While Nynaeve keeps an eye on the fake location for the TAR meeting that is meant to draw out Mesaana, Egwene attends the real meeting, which is between Aes Sedai, Wise Ones, and (for the first time) a handful of Windfinders. We know that Egwene's big goal is that she would like all women who can channel to be 'tied' to the White Tower in some fashion, so I'm guessing this meeting is going to be an attempt at making that work. The Windfinders describe the White Tower taking people in a very poetic way: "The White Tower inhales but does not exhale -- that which is brought in is never allowed to leave." And the Wise Ones are feeling some solidarity with that vibe.

Egwene agrees with this point and says that they may have been wise to keep their abilities a secret, but then says that the White Tower does have some knowledge that they do not... and they begin to work out a potential bargain. Accepted being sent to learn from Wise Ones or Windfinders... and apprentices being sent to learn from Aes Sedai and then being allowed to return to their people instead of being required to stay with the White Tower. It feels like she's taking the lesson that she saw with Nynaeve in the Testing here and applying it to the Aiel & Atha'an Miere. She also agrees that the ter'angreal that belong to the Aiel and to the Atha'an Miere can be agreed to belong to them, without the White Tower trying to snatch them away because they've declared ~all ter'angreal~ to be theirs.

27. They also talk here about the other 'common foe' that they share -- the Seanchan. That an alliance between their three groups will make it easier for them to stand together against the Seanchan. The bargain still needs to be ratified by each of the individual parties' people but it's a pretty sound one, imo.

28. Mesaana attacks the decoy location and, by ta'veren coincidence, Perrin's journey north with the dreamspike has led him to Tar Valon. And Gawyn manages to return to Tar Valon via Gateway right before the dreamspike arrives and cuts off the city.

29. Carlinya is dead OFF-SCREEN. She was killed by Mesaana off the page? That's so rude. tbh, I actually do wonder if maybe she was supposed to have been one of the women abducted by the Seanchan (due to the viewing that Min had) but no specific notes were left about it? While ravens are somewhat associated with the Dark One, they've been a lot more strongly associated with the Seanchan. But I do wonder if maybe the reason that ELAIDA was the named one who was taken by the Seanchan was so that the readers would be like "oh she deserves it tho" and not hold the Seanchan as accountable for their slave raid as they deserved to be, and as they might be if a non-hostile Aes Sedai were the featured one being abducted.

30. So Egwene, the Aes Sedai, & the Wise Ones are fighting Mesaana and the Black Ajah, while Perrin fights Slayer and Gawyn races to try to protect Egwene's sleeping body from the Seanchan Bloodknife assassin(s).

Nothing about this climax is impossible to do if Rand is still ruthless!Rand imo. He's not really related to what's happening here at all. Dragonmount could have happened after this and it would have been fine, story-wise. I'm feeling pretty strongly overall that it was a mistake to pull the trigger on Rand's epiphany back in TGS.

31. Perrin and his less than a week's worth of Accelerated How To Wolfbrother coursework vs Egwene's year-plus of training (since she started her dreamwalker training in the same book where Perrin & Faile got married, and they just had their anniversary), yet we're supposed to buy that he's become Epic Good at it.

I mean, Sanderson really was caught in a Catch-22 with Perrin tbh, because of how Jordan had stalled Perrin's character arc out. He is SO FAR BEHIND the other characters at the start of TGS that he kinda has to do this accelerated sort of character arc, where he went from driving in reverse to jumping ahead so that he could be with the rest of the pack but... man, there's just Too Much Perrin in this book.

32. The big battle: Gawyn kills the Bloodknives (proving once again that the Seanchan talk of being The Most Superior is just talk) but almost dies in the process. Perrin moving the dreamspike here trapped Mesaana in place; Mesaana attempts to use the same trick on Egwene here that Nynaeve used on Moghedien, imagining an a'dam on here, but Egwene is able to force the thought away and the collar off again (using, in part, the hard-earned control of being Aes Sedai, but also her Dreamer abilities in TAR).

But again, here, we have the reminder of how fucking awful it is to be enslaved by the a'dam, as Egwene fights her panic about temporarily being collared. So again, the narrative has not forgotten how awful the Seanchan are... in the plotlines of the female characters. Egwene is able to take Perrin's "it's only a weave" thought about balefire and turn it into "it's only a piece of metal" about the a'dam. And she is able to turn her will against Mesaana and defeat her permanently. When Egwene wakes up, she finds the bloody scene with Gawyn and the dead Bloodknives, and she bonds Gawyn to save his life.

33. The nightmare that Perrin pulled Slayer into is someone dreaming in terror about the Last Battle. Perrin seems like he's potentially realizing here the full gravity of the Last Battle in this nightmare? Maybe when he wakes up, he'll stop trying to send away volunteers who want to fight in the Last Battle. He's able to use the nightmare to destroy the dreamspike but has to flee before he can kill Slayer; with Hopper's last dying thought to him to "seek Boundless".

That seems like a good place to stop, since there's a PoV change in the next chapter.