#and... 😮💨 really tired
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50 days of routine (october 30, 2024 - december 19, 2024)
an attempt to physically and mentally survive the remainder of this semester. motivation has been dwindling and motivation drops even further when i feel like i've failed because i can't stick to a routine nor figure out how to be sustainably productive! 😓😖 so here we are with...a challenge? 😅🫠
there'll be a checkpoint for updated goals 32 days in (dec 1) 📍because after that, i start reviewing for finals full time…
updates ~daily with my forest 🌲 for the day or week so far and the everyday stuff i want to keep track of or celebrate! 🍾 because even on the days i feel like there's nothing to celebrate, i bet there is if i just...stop comparing myself to others and lower my expectations (progress > perfection) enough that i can truly appreciate life as it happens and just...live. 😖🥀🌹
here's what an ideal week would look like...roughly. i expect things to shift around a little if not a lot, especially as life unfolds and i get into the nitty-gritty of the schedule, but what's non-negotiable is daily movement, as consistent a sleep schedule as possible (bed by 9, up by 7)...and by nov. 3 (end of this week) or nov. 10 (end of next week), i'm hoping to also add the stuff in dark green, the purple, wind-down time after dinner, and hobbiting time as higher priorities too... my main goal for these 50 days is to figure out a sustainable routine that leaves me feeling fulfilled and satisfied with the direction my life is taking. 💃🏻🎶
by cbt i mean since therapy isn't really accessible for me rn i'm going to read about it and/or fill out a workbook 😅
#studyblr#codeblr#chaotic academia#mental health#therapy#it's that time of the semester where it feels appropriate to say#fuckity fuck fuck#more often#i'm sorryyyy i'm just tired and frustratedddd#and... 😮💨 really tired#but i can either be sad about it#or channel it into slightly unhinged energy that is hopefully a bit lighter? idk if you can feel it through the screen but...my brain can..#digital diary#how do i tag this again#100dop#100 days of productivity#100 days of studying#100 days of self discipline#self care#becoming that girl#light academia#cozy academia#cottagecore academia#studyspo#study motivation#study aesthetic#astudentslifebuoy#mittonstudies#studyingwithmila#50 days of routine
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just got a pretty rancid ask in our inbox and we aren't even gonna dignify it with a proper response but some of yall need to understand that fiction and reality arent the same and we really dont care about what people ship and dont ship or all that jazz like genuinely we aint got time for all that shit
sure we try and make sure our followers arent exposed to that sort of stuff and will attempt to delete anything associated with it out of respect for them if we accidentally reblog from someone who blogs about weird stuff, because people feel differently than we do about it but just because we arent telling people we dont agree with telling them to kill themselves doesn't make us bad people.
so unless its something actually harmful don't tell us how to run our blog and attack us because we dont agree with what u say. just chill its not that big a deal.
#we're going to bed#some of yall on thin ice#we really donna wanna take anons away#but these asks are getting exhausting 😮💨#wood wide web#bad vibe hours#probably delete later#dont even know if any of this makes sense but we're tired bruh
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the food noise
#hahahaaaa pleaseee i am trying to be so good#I ate already I did everything i should just leave me aloneeee!!!!!!!!!!!!#im really just so tired of this#there isn't a task that can fully distract me rn 😮💨
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Mfs when
Mfs when I tell them that regulation does not equal censorship.
#IDs are on the alts#👍🏽#proshippers dni#comshippers dni#darkshippers dni#i think y'all do know who I'm talking about here#“but cutting off cp is going to lead to censorship of queers” is you tryna tell me that these are related or something?#because I've never in my life seen queer content getting bucked down for being queer in regulated fanfic sites#so idk what you're trying to say here#🤨#anti ao3#ao3 really disappointed me ngl#specially because I'm a black person#it hurt to watch everyone hype up a site that straight up lets racism run free and with no restrictions#which puts every person of colour in fandom spaces at risk#they really do not care about us Michael...#🤦🏽♂️😮💨#it's a tired face on my device shut up
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lmao i'm so mad that if I ever give birth to twins I will separate them (?
#nah but can you imagine#dcmk spoilers#detective conan spoilers#m27 spoilers#movie27 spoilers#like bro the cliché really???? 😫#I'm tired of mangakas being like this with their stories :/ they aren't cooking#i know it was predictable but that doesn't make it any less shitty#also anoooother failed confession... again#predictable but 😮💨
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Should I go to the ceramics thing tonight or just go next week?
#a talking bunkat#I'm really tired and idk if I should now... but there is a chance I could meet some people finally too.......#😮💨
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Send 🖤 and my character will answer about yours || Accepting !
@advnterccs sent:🖤 { For the Ricks ofc fshdjkf }
Attractiveness
repulsive / hideous / ugly / not attractive / unappealing / not unattractive / meh / no preference / ok / mildly attractive / nice looking / cute / adorable / attractive / pleasant on the eyes / good looking / hot / sexy / beautiful / gorgeous / hot damn / would tap that / perfect / godlike / holy fuck there are no words
"I-I could go on a rant a-about how hot and gorgeous my boyfriend is, b-but I'll fuckin' sum it up by saying this. I-If you look at him an-and you don't see that he is t-the most handsome, sexiest, attractive, m-mouth-watering piece of ass you've ever seen in your life, t-then you need new eyes. N-Not glasses, t-they won't fuckin' do. G-Get a new pair of eyes. An-And a new brain with better tastes, w-while you're at it."
Personality
grating / irritating / frustrating / boring / confusing at best / awkward / unreasonable / psychotic / disturbing / interesting / engaging / affectionate / aggressive / ambitious / anxious / artistic / bad tempered / bossy / charismatic / appealing / unappealing / creative / courageous / dependable / unreliable / unpredictable / predictable / devious / dim / extroverted / introverted / egotistical / gregarious / fabulous / impulsive / intelligent / sympathetic / talkative / up beat / peaceful / calming / badass / flexible
"W-We...Our personalities are really fuckin' similar an-and I can't say that I-I am the easiest person to deal with. I-I'm the fuckin' opposite. An-And Rick...as much as I'd love to say tha-that he's perfect, he's not. H-He has a lot of shitty traits, almost as many as the good ones...b-but when they don't get between us? E-Even those are enticing on him. S-So...we make it work. An-And knowing each other inside out...i-it makes shit easier, o-on the long term."
Level of friendship
never in a million years / worst of enemies / enemies / rivals / indifferent / neutral / acquaintance / friendly toward each other / casual friends / friends / good friends / best friends / fuck buddies / bosom buddies / practically the same person / would die for them / true friends / my only friend
"R-Rick is my best friend. W-We understand each other in ways n-no one else ever will. W-We are closer than we could ever be w-with anyone. R-Romantically, b-but platonically too. I-I just...I-I trust him. With everything. M-Morty than anyone. E-Even more than myself. I-I trust him with shit I-I wouldn't trust me with. B-Because I know for certain tha-that he'll go to hell and back not to fail me."
First impression of them
i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them
"S-Saying that our forced encounter was messy i-is a fuckin' understatement. W-We were instantly distrustful of each other on principle b-because we were dealing with another Rick. T-Then we found out that we were the same Rick an-and we disliked each other even more. S-Self-loathing and all that shit. Y-Yet...we bonded a little, w-while figuring out how to leave the limbo. An-And the whole gun thing? S-Shit, that was hot. H-He was hot."
Current impression of them
i hate them so much / i don’t like them / i don’t trust them / they annoy me / they’re weird / I’m indifferent / meh / they seem alright / they’re growing on me / truce / I think I like them / I like them / I’m not sure if I trust them / I trust them / they’re cool / they’re genuine / I think we’re going to get along / I really like them / I think I’m in love / oh fuck they’re hot / I love them
"I-I've said it a thousand times, s-so I won't go on a rant about this either, b-but...Rick is everything. M-My universe starts and ends w-with him. W-When we are together, a-all matters is us. I-I could have just him in my life f-from not to the end of forever an-and it would be enough. I-I've doubted everything in my life, b-but now I can't even think about doubting him an-and all that he is to me."
#[ ic :: c137 Rick ]#[ headcanons :: c137 Rick ]#[ Step through the mirror and let me tell you my dreams for our destiny :: Rick & Rick ]#[ v. Rick Double Morty and Trouble ; timeline split :: c137 Rick ]#advnterccs#[[ welcome to another episode of 'Rick rants about his boyfriend and gets obnoxiously sappy' 😮💨 ]]#[[ I swear he repeats the same shit every time but he doesn't get tired of it at all xD ]]#[[ he's just SO in love omg x3 ]]#[[ and he really loves recalling that gun thing from their first meetint 🙄 ]]#;; queue
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🏝️🌞💗
#well! we made it to our house in california!#it was … a very long road trip (dog acting nuts and having to sort that out - we did! - and then busted tires and just general exhaustion#but we made it!#thing is: the house looks like a mess (to put it mildly) so it’s all really hitting and just even more overwhelming and stressful#all this moving stuff on top of having to find a new job and insurance and all the things to just live has got me 😮💨🥴🥲🫠#BUT! i’m trying to tell myself it was always gonna take time so i just need to take it a day / a task at a time#it’ll get there 🥴🙏🏻#it’s just a lot but!! trying to just keep it moving!#no clue when I’ll be able to check here more properly and write here properly (I WILL be back i just dunno when)#thanks for hanging with me and pleeeeease feel free to come write with me on discord cause I can handle that way better right now#love you all! 💗💗💗💗#00. // OUT OF AMMO ( OOC POST. )
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going to explode forever
#i’m still cleaning my room right and i have my shitty old laptop that i bought ~4.5 years ago that got me through college and everything#and it was sooo good i loved her so much !! i still have to use it for editing my amvs too bc the screen resolution is just so much better#than the new computer i bought last may. anyway but i have to connect a keyboard to it and keep it plugged in 24/7 bc it immediately dies#otherwise and certain keys don’t work. like when i say it’s on its last legs i mean it#and it’s crashing more and more lately so i’m too scared to edit anything bc i don’t have anything backed up !!!!!!#but ANYWAY it’s ridiculous to have to have 2 laptops one for editing amvs and one for all my other stuff like browsing and school etc#like that’s taking up so much space it’s such a hassle etc but the laptop i would really need is . $1500 😮💨🤢#and even if i sold my new-used 1 year old laptop it would only go for like. $500-$600 max and i can’t afford $1100 💀 but also i DO have loan#money from school and it WOULD be a big investment but !!! i grew up poor!!!!!! i live in constant fear of big purchases !!!!#but i also know!!! that this big purchase would meet all my needs and last for years!!! anyway. okay i’m done ranting i tired myself out#if ur reading this hi kiss 😘
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Good Night everyone. I need energy for tomorrow because the SKZ CB will be out and I'll listen to it asap.
Fyi I don't know almost nothing because I didn't catch up with any content except some videos here and there and that's it. Am I hyped? Yes.
Yes I am.
A lot
#I didn't even listened to the mashup/whatever the heck was that animated video#not the skzoo one#I watched that one#because they're my boobboos#these days I'm really ending up tired#I barely have the energy to interact with the moots 😮💨😞#if you're reading this thank you#interacting with you is always a pleasure for me#pensieri random#ps. I don't know if I'll go to sleep immediately#maybe I'll write something idk
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.😮💨🐺
I hate people who think it's fun to race down the streets in the wee hours of the morning. Just about every time I'm just about to sleep someone revs their engine. It's 01:30.
#I'm really tired of it#and really tired#it's sleepy wolf hours 😴 but they keep waking me up#whiskey speaks#🐺#😮💨
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I can't help thinking that Delayed Sleep Phase is only considered a disorder because capitalism doesn't accommodate alternative schedules. This despite the necessity of 2nd & 3rd shift jobs in fields like medicine and emergency response and any number of jobs involving processes that take longer than 8 hours to complete.
Like, I get that economy of scale means that some things all get done at the same time because it's more efficient. But surely there'd be benefits to recognizing that more than one schedule exists in society?
People shouldn't have to spend their entire lives struggling with insomnia, being called lazy and irresponsible, and suffering the ill effects of never getting enough sleep just because some smug assholes got together and decided that "the ass crack of dawn" is the only acceptable wake up time.
And I'd bet monies that the 10am-12pm folks are just the furthest edge of this Delayed Sleep Phase nonsense. Everyone out there who needs multiple alarms to get up in the morning? Every person who only ever gets up 10 minutes before they have to run out the door, sucking down a pot's worth of caffeine by the time they get where they're going? Tell me they wouldn't benefit from pushing their entire lives back a couple of hours. I dare you.
one of the most enlightening realizations ive had was finding out that non-24 hour circadian rhythm people were a pretty large group and most of us have oddly similar cycles of usually around 28hr internal "days" and this masquerades as "insomnia" but if allowed to sleep and wake naturally we will just advance forward through time an extra 2-4 hours a day at a relatively stable pace. we can't go to school or jobs or even run errands on normal schedules without massive pharmacological and behavioral intervention. most of the people who have been diagnosed or figured it out themselves will report horrific, life-ruining disruption in their professional lives and terrible health from accrued lack of sleep. this disorder is most common in vision-impaired people which seems to suggest it's related to light cues. anyway just thinking about this as extremely loud yard work woke me up at 8am for the second day in a row
#the speed at which my sleep pattern reverts to being up until AT LEAST 2am is really depressing when your partner starts work at 7:30am#the years I spent getting up at 4:30am to commute 2 hours for an 8am class were by far the hardest and tiredest years of my entire life#and don't get me started on how being off your natural sleep rhythm makes seasonal affective disorder so much worse#😮💨 so tired 😭
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youtube
This is what inspired the blocking post. I hate fighting this character I hate it. She's so cute I love her but why the FUCK DOES SHE GET TO HAVE HER DP WHERE THE HELL IS MINE??? WHERE ARE MY PLUS FRAMES AND MIXUP IT'S NOT FAAAAIR WAAAAH.
I finally bit the bullet and made an account to use clipchamp. I'm not happy about it but I can finally censor names so that's nice. I will be doing it shittily but hey it's censored so that's something. Please enjoy me desperately scamming my way to victory as per usual.
#saiplays#guilty gear#ggst#axl low#bridget guilty gear#I was back in that corner literally BEGGING like “Please god do the roll in I am MASHING super I can't do this anymore I'm so tired”#and thankfully she did 😮💨#I KNOW people say this MU is Axl favored but dude it REALLY doesn't feel like it#but whatever I'm not a patient man so I don't try to block the mixups as well as I could be so maybe a skill issue#Axl still sucks you'll never get me to say he doesn't ask long as I have to keep watching EVERY other zoner zone and then convert#to plus frames AND mix somehow#fucking Johnny fuckin Chaos fuckin *grumble grumble grumble*#Youtube
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the tug and pull of I don't want to force someone to open up / make them feel pressured to VS realizing that if they don't open up then I'm the only one making myself emotionally vulnerable anymore and our bond is losing that connection
#vent#it sucks man#like did i do or say something to make them feel unsafe being emotionally vulnerable?#is it a problem i can help fix or is it just something i need to lend time and patience to?#the latter. probably.#its just kinda sucky though when im told things are fine when the signs say otherwise#my intuition isnt usually wrong but it is clumsy#do i say something about it? because im tired of floundering and wondering if somethings up#and i guess worrying about it#really thats all it is i just dont want to worry abt stuff that isnt my problem#i just am so damn compelled to try to fix shit 😮💨 even when its not my shit to fix#i guess if it effects the relationship and me then its kinda my problem after all#cuz it does suck for me. i need emotional connectivity#but i dont want it if its forced#gugh. relationship hard.
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Here I go again, trying to gather up my will.
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why are companies doing more summer internships for students when i just graduated, and why were they only recruiting new graduates when i was looking for a summer internship last summer??? they really dont want me to work huh
#just yapping#im really tired of seeing link*din notifs abt bunch of internships which only want students#😮💨
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