#and. honestly. i have trauma from it. I'm not comfortable enough yet but yes i was diagnosed with ptsd because of the mishaps in recovery

[diagonal-queen]

chuuya, kunikida, and dazai with an s/o who would hide under the bed for no reason besides its nice down there and would sometimes grab their ankle to scare them

i would love to hang out under my bed tbh but i keep all my stuff under there lol. good deterrent for demons because then they can't fit under there

S/O who hides under the bed

♡ pairing: Chuuya Nakahara, Doppo Kunikida, Dazai Osamu x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: How are these guys with an S/O who likes hanging out under the bed?

♡ cw: Swearing, teensy tiny bit of NSFW in Dazai's part.

note:

Seriously though. Thank you guys for all your sweet comments and messages I really appreciated all of them very much (and yes each one made me cry). I might not say it very much but I love all of you guys and I'm thankful for your support. Apologies for errors and I hope you enjoy x

Chuuya:

He's just kinda like...wha...? He's so confused at first lol

Even if you grab his ankle and try to scare him, he's just like...why'd you do that babygirl (gender neutral term). He'd also find it kind of adorable how frustrated you get that it didn't work, but what were you expecting? He's a mafia executive babygirl (again, gender neutral term)

Chuuya is little amused by your under-the-bed habit and lowkey thinks it's pretty cute. At first though he was kinda worried as to what caused it, but if it makes you feel better then he doesn't care

If he wants you out of there he will coax you out with your favourite food or something like you're a puppy (he's getting his yearning for a pet dog out of his system don't worry)

Probably wouldn't go under the bed with you super often, but you guys would have a lot of conversations while he's laying on the bed and you're laying under it. It's surprisingly easy to do!

Would start leaving you little gifts/snacks down there sometimes as a surprise

Probably wouldn't encourage you to sleep under there though. Spinal health and all

As always Chuuya is very supportive and all he wants is for you to feel happy and safe <3

Kunikida:

Worried about this habit at first. He assumes that it's some kind of trauma response. Whether it is or it isn't he'll learn to accept it don't worry

That being said he doesn't really love it. If you wanna relax he'd rather that you do it in a more comfortable space. If you're under there because you don't feel great then he'd rather you just talk to him. He'd do (almost) anything to make you feel better :')

If you grabbed his ankle one time to scare him he might never recover. Like he'd be genuinely terrified. Might faint or burst into tears or scream or something idk

Absolutely would chide you for your "childish behaviour". In all honesty he just feels like it's something Dazai would do and he suffers enough from this kind of thing at work

But yes in the end he would forgive you if you apologised to him. Might not be so kind if you continued trying to scare him though

Leaves you a pillow and a blanket down there just in case you get cold. He won't leave any food though because he's worried about ants and mould and stuff

Wouldn't go under there with you though. Sorry but he just doesn't wanna 😪

Honestly? As long as you're getting your shit done, he doesn't mind where you spend your free time

Dazai:

He literally doesn't even question it. Sometimes small spaces are just cosy y'know?

Dazai literally lived in a shipping container (at least I think? I haven't read Stormbringer yet T-T). He'd be all up for hanging out under the bed whether or not you were with him lol

The first time you grab his ankle to scare him, if you're lucky, you'll catch him off guard. But you're never getting his ass again, ever

I mean sometimes he might play along to humour you, but you'll literally never actually scare him again. Like he just walks into your bedroom under the assumption that you're under the bed and prepared to scare him.

Straight up if he can't find you when he wakes up or something he'll just guess that you're under the bed and won't bother you.

That being said if you straight up disappeared or something he'd obviously worry about you. But he gives you space when you need it, and will only come under the bed with you if you say he can

Also he would definitely start doing it to you. Both as revenge and just because he thinks it's funny, but he'll stop if you ask him to (you don't. It straight up becomes a war)

He straight up might try to get it on with you under the bed, as if there's room or something. Damnit Dazai

taglist~ ♡ @gettinshiggywithit, @fedyushka, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl

[findafight]

On the one-sided harringrove post- I feel it becomes infinitely funnier with bi steve. He likes men, just not Billy. Never Billy.

Oh yeah. When Billy fiiiirst comes to school with his music blaring Steve is head over heels for Nancy, so he might register that the guy with the Camaro and loud music has a good ass, but then billy opens his mouth and Steve is like "oh, no ass can make up for that personality." And continues with his life.

Just. Okay I like to project just a liiiiittle on Steve with him just. Not realizing his attraction to men isn't a straight thing. Like. Of course all straight people feel that way, you just kinda ignore it or don't do anything about it. So Steve is half way between being comfortable in his sexuality and being closeted to himself because buddy used Hawkeye Pierce as the blueprint of straightness.

So Billy is out here, wallowing in self hatred and internalized homophobia, hating Steve and wanting Steve and hating that he wants Steve and wishing Steve would pay attention to him enough for a hate fuck he can cry about later, and it's all very angsty. All the while Steve is just actually completely fine with thinking a dude is hot he's just got standards that include "not racist" "doesn't try to beat up kids" "hasn't made me blackout from head trauma"

Wait. Oh no. I feel an au coming on. Shit. Au where post S2 Robin hears piano coming from the band room after hours and is her curious self going "I must see who is this mysterious genius" and it's Steve. They get to talking and hanging out and all of a sudden Robin thinks they are actually good friends. Best friends. Somehow.

Cue them going to a band party together. Someone spikes their drinks with waayyyy more than they were expecting so they are blasted. Robin has to go pee but does not want to go alone so she drags Steve into the bathroom with her and makes him face away. He's like haha Woah you really had to pee. And she goes shut upppp and washes her hands but sits across from him. Steve smiles at her and gives her his speech about how amazing she is and how glad he is to be her friend (it is like March '85 so he is still not ready to get back out into dating yet). Robin tells him about Tammy. They sing. Someone slams the door open and kicks them out of the bathroom because there's a fuckin line.

They lay on the grass outside and look at the sky. Steve like. Caaaaasually mentions once having thought he was gonna marry Tommy when he was six and then realizing you just didn't do anything about those feelings and Robin's gotta shoot up going WHAT!! WHAAAT? Because it sounded like Steve coming out to her? Right after?? She came out to him??

And Steve is like yeah. Like you don't really have to? Easier to ignore it and flirt with girls who I like or think are hot. And poor Robin's brain is melting she's like please Steve I'm really drunk are you telling me you sometimes want to kiss boys? And he's like yes, obviously, everyone does. Just like everyone also wants to sometimes kiss girls. Except lesbians I guess who only want to kiss girls? And gay guys only want to kiss guy? Yeah that makes sense and straight people don't care but go for the opposite ya know?

Robin is like NO!! And calms down some and says "okay I'm telling you this because you are my friend and you just told me almost the same thing. Steve. I like girls and only like girls. That not a straight thing"

"yeah. You've said."

"but I am ninety nine percent positive that just because you like girls doesn't mean you're straight because you also like boys."

"what"

"yeah dude, I do not think this is a heterosexual experience you're describing. I'm not an expert but. Yeah.

"oh. Huh."

"yep."

"I definitely thought it was."

"your brain is so weird I'm still kind of obsessed with you."

"haha. Honestly I'm kind of obsessed with you. This is wild."

"well. At least I know you're stuck with me."

"ohhh nooooo whatever will I do with my best friend always around..."

ANYWAYS THE ACTUAL POINT OF THIS is not in fact the stobin. It's actually that

Sometime probably in may, when Steve is ready to be on the dating scene again, he gets with Eddie. Robin is happy for him but also so mad because he went from "probably shouldn't act gay even tho everyone feels a little gay sometimes" to "hey Robin what would you say if I said I got a boyfriend?" In less than two months. How does he have straight AND gay game. That's not fair.

Steddie getting together is a non event. Eddie is still like ewww sports and yet somehow he made out with Steve Harrington and the next day Steve asked if he wanted to get milkshakes and throw rocks into the quarry to see the splashes. Eddie must restrain himself from thinking it's a date because he knows it's not but it'd also be the perfect date (Eddie is a simple man)

At the end of the night steve kissed his cheek and says "I had a really great time..."

Eddie just blurted "hey do you want to be my boyfriend?"

To which Steve perks up like "yes! I'd like that!"

And Eddie didn't actually think he'd get that far so he was like "neat!! See you tomorrow!" before slamming the door in Steve's face.

So they're dating and Eddie disparages sports but Steve is like haha aw you don't like watching me play? Which is sooo mean to Eddie because obviously?? He likes?? Watching his boyfriend??? Run around in tiny shorts and sometimes shirtless?? He has to reevaluate some things he supposes.

All while this is happening Billy is still on his Greatest Homoerotic Rivals shtick with Steve. Eddie notices and is like to dude...what is with Billy? And Steve just sighs. Says Billy is weird and obsessed with him and glares all the time. It's a whole thing. Billy is pissed because what is Steve, his epic rival, doing hanging around some random band geek, his sister's bitchass friends, and maybe the local dealer.

Alright. Grad happens. Yay Steve! Poor Eddie. They go to some party , hang out with people, sell some drugs, etc. Billy is unfortunately also at this party, and is like. Lazer eyes boring into Steve's back. Very annoying. At some point, he sees Steve slip away and is like this is my chance so he follows him.

Howmever he comes across Steve, his epic and totally heterosexual rival, making out with Eddie the freak Munson.

And listen this is a scary thing to be caught inna town like Hawkins, but that's not the point of this post.

So Billy goes "what the hell?"

They turn around. Billy is still spluttering.

"what are you-why would you-- with him?!" He says.

Steve raises his eyebrows, alllll cocky confidence. He smirks a bit. Drawls. "Well, yeah. I like cock, billy. Just not yours."

Because the point of this post is that Steve is a bitch.

Thank you.

[denaliwrites]

Love's Perfect Ache

Alec Hardy x GN!Reader

Summary: You have news for Alec and he doesn't take it the way you'd hoped.

Soundtrack: Arsonist’s Lullaby by Hozier

Requests: Open!

Warnings: Pregnancy, Mention of Abortion. No pronouns but Reader has a functional uterus.

You hold one end of a pregnancy test in one hand and tap the other end against the palm of the opposite hand while your legs aimlessly take you in circles around the kitchen. It's an anxious tick, something you've been doing for the last two hours. Since you took the test and saw the result.

Positive.

You can't help it -- it's not even good or bad news yet (that'll be figured out once you tell Alec). But learning you're carrying a baby is rarely something that people feel neutral about. And now, all you can focus your energy on is pacing and tap tap tapping the test against your palm while you wait for Alec to come home.

Of course, you want it to be good news. You've seen Alec with kids -- he's great with them when he actually cares enough to put in the effort to be. You've met Daisy a few times, and every time you see the two together you see that he's putting in the work to be a good dad, that he cares and does his best for her.

You'd be lying if you said seeing him with Daisy, or any of the neighborhood kids, didn't make you want kids of your own with him. Or even just a kid. One would be enough, really. You're not sure his heart could take more than one, anyway.

Your pacing came to a halt when you heard the door open and shut, panic suddenly filling you. As he rounds the corner and his eyes land on you and he starts to smile, you anxiously blurt out, "I'm pregnant."

You wait with bated breath, hyperaware of his expression, the way it changes from joy at seeing you to confusion to realization to panic and finally settles on...

"Fuck!" he growls in anger, and you shrink back, clutching the test tightly. "I thought we were being careful."

"I... I don't understand," you whimper. "Why are you angry?"

"Because I can't have another kid!" he turns his ire on you, but stops when he sees your devastated expression. "Darlin', I don't have it in me to raise another kid. I'm not as young as I used to be."

You nod, trying to hold back the tears. "I understand."

"And -- and think of Daisy," he went on, seemingly on a roll. "She's sixteen now, think how weird it'd be for her to be sixteen, seventeen years older than her little sibling."

"Y-you're right," you said, trying to placate him, trying to stop him. "Honestly, I should've expected you to react this way..."

He goes on, rambling about his heart and his career and at one point he circles back to his age, before moving on to the trauma of the Sandbrook case. He's completely missed that you're in tears.

That is, until you finally have enough. "Fine," you sob, and that stops him, that finally gets him to shut up. "Fine. You clearly... you don't want it. I'll make an appointment at the clinic tomorrow for termination."

He pauses, caught between having gotten, presumably, exactly what he wanted and a need to comfort you. Eventually, though you're not sure how, his need to comfort you wins out, and he pulls you into a tight and loving embrace. "Not... not yet," he says with a sigh.

"Why?" you ask meanly, squirming in his embrace to try to break free. He doesn't let you.

"We're both emotional," he says softly, hold loosening once he's sure you won't run away. "Let's... let's take some time, y'ken? Maybe we'll... maybe I'll come 'round. Who knows?"

"Why on Earth would you do that?"

"'Cause I love ye," he says simply, like there could not possibly be any other answer, like you should know that there is no other answer. "And your happiness means the world to me... and if that means ye get a kid, then..." He trails off, but you feel him shrug.

"I'm not gonna force you to have a baby with me, Alec," you whimper, eyes fixed on the wall ahead of you.

He slips a hand under your chin, tilting your head up so that you'll look at him. "You're not forcin' me to do anythin', darlin'," he assured you, planting a loving kiss to the corner of your mouth. "I want what'll make your heart sing."

[mswyrr]

^^ Well said. I delayed reading it because I didn't want to engage with it for a while - and, once I did, even though Collins had earned so much trust from me with her handling of Katniss and Peeta's disabilities, I was still wary. So I actually highlighted every instance where she wasn't writing him according to ableist tropes.

Yes, at 18 he's been shaped by Capitol indoctrination at school and in his family and in the media. He sees with those lenses. They come easily and automatically to him. But he also connects with people as people and realizes - oh, the District kids are just kids?? And they're being starved and hurt? I know what it's like to go hungry... This is wrong. Why should Lucy Gray have to sing just to get food? I'll get her some, even though I don't have enough.

Over and over - but if you stand up for the wrong people, you will be punished. He tries it; he protects Lucy Gray. And then he pays the price and -- somewhere along the way, he doesn't want to pay anymore. He wants to protect his family and be a winner. And you can't be a winner--comfortable and safe and in control--and stand with someone your society has designated to lose. So he chooses.

It's heartbreaking - and it is, sadly, terrifyingly, the kind of choices the majority of people make - his 18-year-old choices, that is. That moment in his life is the perfect one to write about, because it turns the eye of the story on how young people are shaped - but also, at that young stage, he's closer to the common ordinary people in any corrupt society. He's just trying to survive. It's later that his urge to win motivates him to get worse and worse and worse - no longer wanting to protect his family, in fact tossing Tigris aside, *only* wanting to win. Taking pleasure in driving people into the ground.

It takes decades of choices for him to become that person, though. And it is a creation he makes of himself. The younger person is closer to most people though.

For example, I live in a democracy, thankfully. And yet it is so much driven by what Langston Hughes called "the same old stupid plan / Of dog eat dog, of mighty crush the weak." When I walk into work and I see the cops clearing unhoused people from the only homes and safety they have--a process that we know from studies shortens peoples' lives, hurts them emotionally and physically for no gd reason, just cruelty, just greed--living in an encampment near my work - I don't do anything. I'm afraid to. Sure, I try to donate to people who help and write letters and vote... but I don't resist directly. I'd be punished. So there's a little bit of that 18-year-old kid early in the book who knows right and wrong and yet just wants to be safe in me. And I have to wrestle with it. Because I don't want to ever forget that it's a wrestling match. That's when the perverse incentive structure starts to consume you IMO. And most of us live in societies with perverse incentive structures of some kind. Some lure that is offered to us, of feeling better than, of exploiting others, and some threats of punishment too.

To my mind, it's a good story that can make me think of feeling a pang of shame and sadness and then looking away as the cops clear people and remembering that it's a struggle, that I am not simply on the side of angels, that my society is structured around cruelty and greed and it doesn't have to be. It shouldn't be.

re: the use of trauma. I'm interested to see what Viola Davis does with the role and how Dr Gaul is adjusted in the film script - honestly, her apparent flatness was one of the things in the book I thought could be better? And in film reviews I'm reading it seems like they strengthened her. We'll see. I think she's so good at leaning into why all of this is justified because she truly believes it. And she's looking for future leaders who can truly believe it too. And, as much as she and Highbottom apply pressures to shape this youth--including that hilarious imo scene where Coriolanus naively says "people love children"--by the end Coriolanus is writing her letters and offering himself as someone who will fit that shape in order to get the rewards it offers. There's a subtle shift as that happens that is quite nuanced. And, again, focusing on his youth is so powerful because he's a being in formation, a person being created and creating himself as an adult.

There's a *reason* why Collins opens the book with this quote:

“I thought of the promise of virtues which he had displayed on the opening of his existence, and the subsequent blight of all kindly feeling by the loathing and scorn which his protectors had manifested towards him.” — Mary Shelley, Frankenstein, 1818

Though, again, the major shift of Part 3 for me is that he begins to take an active part in forming himself and he is fashioning himself to be a winner, to fit what he believes Dr Gaul and the authorities at the military school want, hoping and fearing that he won't be able to do it so well and desperately happy when the chance at rewards for doing so is still open to him. IMO Part 3 and the Epilogue aren't the end of his journey, they're the death of other possibilities and the birth of who he's choosing to become. And even he can't fully imagine where that will go as the decades pass and the choices mount up.

That is not the kind of quote you use to begin a story about someone who was born evil to begin with. The book takes 528 pages even though it's only about a few months in one 18-year-old's life precisely because it's a carefully drawn and teased out character journey, a corruption arc. As reviewer David Ehrlich put it in his review of the movie:

is Coriolanus embracing his nature or defiling it?

It's supposed to be a question, not a foregone conclusion. And I think the weight of the text itself leans in favor of "defiling" as the answer. Though it can be interpreted multiple ways (as it should be). I think the movie only lines we have from Lucy Gray in the trailer hold true: "there’s a natural goodness born into us all.” But, in one way or another, it doesn’t just stay that way, it’s a struggle. “It’s our life’s work to stay on the right side of that line [between good and evil].”

It’s a little on the nose with the themes, but I’m cool with them having her be so clear about it since apparently it’s not clear in the book I guess????

[vodika-vibes]

Arachne having to point out trauma therapy for the Jedi & their battalions 🤦‍♀️ Honestly she’s just cleaning up their messes

I feel like this is a conversation that she's had with them before, lol

In fact! Let's rewind to the Jedi Council's first meeting with Arachne.

Arachne frowns as she looks at Dogma, who's half wrapped around her, with his head pillowed on her stomach, while he dozes, and then she looks at Tup, who's using one of her couch pillows as a stuffed animal. Her boys are traumatized. And she knows that the battalions don't have mental health specialists on them, or else she would have met them before now. Her frown deepens as she lightly strokes the top of Dogma's head. This is unacceptable. Just because they've been trained their whole life for war doesn't mean that they can't get trauma. The answer is simple, bully the Jedi into letting the battalions use their mind healers. Yes! Perfect! She's so clever~ Carefully she shimmies out of Dogma's grasp, and slides one of her stuffed tookas in her place, and then she presses a feather light kiss to the top of Dogma's head and she ghosts into her bedroom. It's time for your friendly, neighborhood Arachne to make an appearance at the Jedi temple. She pulls her suit on, and moves to the window, before she pauses in thought. Quickly she scrawls a note on a sticky note, and she sticks it to Tup's forehead, and then she jumps out the window. The Jedi temple isn't that far away, all things considered, especially when she can swing from speeder to speeder, and soon enough she's crawling through the vents, up to the council room. The adults...adultier adults, at least, are talking about something, and Arachne is curious as to how long she can lurk before someone notices her...or calls her out. Oh, she's well aware that they're well aware that she's there, based on the way that eyes keep flickering up towards her, but they haven't called her out yet. Half an hour later, there's a pause in conversation, and Master Koon tilts his head, "Would you care to join us, my dear? The vent can't be comfortable." Arachne laughs softly, and opens the vent to flip into the room, "You'd be surprised," she quips as she lands lightly on her feet, "Nice ta meetcha. I'm Arachne, and I'm here to argue for allowing the clones use of your mind healers." The room is silent for a moment, and then there's a soft laugh, "Miss Arachne," Master Kenobi says lightly, "We're Jedi...we don't use mind healers." Arachne pauses when she receives that, admittedly shocking, information. It reminds her of the time when she, Miles, and Pete had to stand in front of the Avengers and argued that they (the Avengers) definitely needed therapy. She nods slowly, and then beams, "Hello! My name is Arachne, and I'm here to encourage the jedi and the clones to start seeing Mind Healers. I have a presentation."

[daddysboydean]

Hey! ^_^

So I'm copy pasting this cause I'm asking several people the same thing to gather answers, and I dont want to mess up my wording.

Why do you ship Wincest, why do you like it?

And I know a base answer would be "look at the way they look at each other" but you can notice that people have a thing for each other or acknowledge a couple without shipping it, without being invested in it or liking it.

For me it's because I think it's cute and sweet, that they would be able to make something nice out of the, to be frank, dumpster fire of their life, that they could cut a weird little hole for themselves and say "in the midst of all this bad, THIS is for us." It also interests me to think about how they would get to this point, to cross so many lines and become attached to each other in a way that is VERY atypical, even for their isolated situation. Cause not every set of siblings, even when put through a ridiculous amount of trauma, turn towards each other in a incestuous way. They might be codependently bonded, but it doesn't usually spill over into the physical or romantic. (I'm talking about all this in a very fictional setting btw).

So I enjoy the created home and comfort, and the psychological(?) aspect of what would make it happen.

And I was curious about what the appeal was for you.

Thank you! ♡

such an interesting question! there are easy answers, like you said, look at the way they look at each other. the actors had great chemistry which makes it easy to ship their characters together. and it fascinates/torments me that they’re brothers and yet the homoeroticism on the show was fucking intentional, like i will never ever get over how absolutely bonkers that is. drives me wild. 

why do i ship them, though? honestly i think i have a pretty basic bitch answer. it comes down to wincest having everything in it that i got into fanfic for in the first place. my previous ships were all darker, and i was generally drawn to even darker iterations of those ships in the fic I read. i like it when there’s something wrong about the couple, some reason they shouldn’t be together (forbidden romance <3 yay <3). i like unhealthy power dynamics, obsession and codependence, morally gray characters and anti-heros, characters who feel born wrong or made dirty, outsiders, ‘us against the world’ and when there are external forces at play that the pairing has to go up against. bonus points if there are supernatural/magical elements and if the pair are on opposite sides of...something. i don’t like a lot of fluff — just a sprinkle of it, really, a taste, enough to provide a little reprieve from all the darkness and raise the stakes but not enough to outshine it. gimme whump and character studies. i’m big on sexual tension even if it’s not an explicitly sexual fic. none of my previous ships were canonically incestuous, but i’d find the incest AUs anyway — usually daddy/daughter stuff (wincest is actually my first queer ship). 

anyway, wincest has all of that in spades. it’s kind of like my perfect ship. you said they're atypical even for their situash and yes, they’re so fucked up and wrong, and on a very visceral level. they’re more fucked up than any other ship I’ve ever shipped, and it’s fucking canon. you don’t have to even try to make them as unhealthy as possible because they’re already there. and digging into that? sticking your fingers in the wounds of their psyche to see what makes them tick then pouring salt on that shit to make it worse? literally makes me want to scream! they’re sick in the head for each other and i’m sick in the head for them. even if we’re not talking wincest as in my dick is hard for my brother, even if it’s just gencest or weirdcest, it’s totally fascinating to crack them open and take a peek inside. and yet there’s capacity for such a painful, gut-wrenching softness between them that ruins me. it ruins me. you can put the happiest spin on their story but it'll always be a tragedy.

the last thing i’ll say is that there’s a lot of material to work with. i typically stick to preseries or kripke era fic when i read and write, but SPN is kinda special because yeah there are 15 seasons to pick at and dissect and expand on, but the writing was also super sketch at times and the storylines weren’t terribly cohesive throughout, plus it was written for a family network, so a lot is still left to the imagination. they gave us enough (whether intentionally or accidentally) to make for some seriously compelling theories and headcanons — and to imagine how things could be X rated. really no limit to what you can come up with, and that’s a fun playground to roll around in.   

thanks for asking! this is something i've thought about in a back burner sort of way but never really looked at head-on.

[dufferpuffer]

On the topic of boggarts: do you think it was irresponsible for lupin to use them in the first lesson in class? I’ve seen people talk about this before and I think there’s an interesting critique to be made. 1. Having students expose their fears in front of their classmates might leave them vulnerable to targeted bullying. 2. Students could have trauma exposed through the boggart. (Most of the kids had childish fears yes, and he only jumped in front of Harry because he assumed it would have been more serious than the others but he doesn’t know the other kids and one of his 13 year olds could very much have suffered some kind of abuse or something of the sort and have that manifest in a boggart. Seems like an oversight.) what’s your take?

Yes, I do - but not wrong to deal with Boggart's early. Honestly they should probably be a first or second year class. And maybe they are - Snape does say they are far behind in the curriculum, though how hyperbolic he was being is hard to tell.

Boggarts are more dangerous the more trauma you have experienced. Molly, who had lost both her brothers in the first war and now had a whole family of loved ones, couldn't deal with it. I fear, while Dumbledore could deal with one, it would destabilize him far more to see the corpse of Ariana than it would Ron to see a spider. After Ron had experienced Hermione being tortured... im sure his Boggart changed to something more like that. Crippling.

So dealing with Boggarts early is almost critical - when most children do not have experiences that would make them a problem yet. ...But some will. It is irresponsible to thrust children into that without propperly getting to know them.

Even with how low the bar is for magical school safety and logic - Harry was in that class. The way Remus structured it was to have the Boggart bounce between students as it saw fit, confused. He had to run and protect Harry. He hadn't even pulled him aside - a reasonable thing to do, considering what he has famously gone through, not just as a baby but in the previous two years.

So yes, I think it was highly irresponsible as a first class. Why would he do such a thing...? Because he was scared. He was scared of being unimpressive, of not being good enough to teach, of the children fearing him as a monster (irrational - but that's what he fears most.)

So what does he do...? He falls back on what he knows best, his fathers specialty: Boggarts. Something he knows in-and-out. He picks a BIGGER monster than him to be in the room, so he will look good no matter what. He teaches the children he will stand up with them against their greatest fears. I doubt he planned it, but how cool he would have felt to jump infront of Harry Potter in order to prevent Voldemort from appearing. Heroic.

I'm sure he justified it as Boggarts being essential to learn about early... it being a good topic to start on given there are dementors in the school this year... very familiar to him, so its a safe thing to start with.... but really he didn't do it for the kids. He did it for himself. Comforting himself is usually his no. 1 priority.

If I were to take the class:

First year, second half of it. Half a year to get to know the students and see their capabilities with their wands - and the students will be at the school for awhile after, not home - where abuse might be. Have a week learning about Non-Beings, focusing on Boggarts.

The kids are 11 - so have them answer questions like "Have you ever had a Boggart in your house?" and "What sort of places do you think a Boggart would like to be?" (closets, attics, basements, under beds) Give them time to think about what their Boggart might become - and give some students the chance to perhaps share what their Boggart DID become if they've seen one before.

Teacher shares what THEIR boggart is. Be a little vulnerable. If it is 'light', like a spider, they can connect with students. If it is heavy - they can tell how fearsome Boggarts really can be. That, when they face a Boggart, they will need a different teacher to handle the class with them.

Build up the practical as a game. It is best to deal with Boggarts in groups, so the class will 'play' with one, all together - it'll bounce between them quite harmlessly. However - if you do not wish to take part, because your boggart might be particularly fearsome - you stand at the back with the teacher and watch how it is done. Then, individually, after class, you have your go - with the teacher right at your back, with you.

It is VERY important to learn how to push through. But if it is truly horrifying and the student cannot manage - the teacher is right there to step forward and deal with it themselves.

[alwynwitch]

YESSS!!!! One thing I noticed too, is that when Lestat talks about Armand, Gabrielle, Nicki etc, he mentions what they're doing, how they're doing it and his own impressions of it and what his reactions were... But the focus is on what Lestat thinks and how he feels about them, not the other way around. Now, with Marius, he makes assumptions of what he believes are Marius's intentions. He talks about Marius being patient and gentle, wanting to calm him down etc, but those are his own projections because he didn't know Marius enough at the time to classify the nature of his actions, Marius didn't say any of those things and he wasn't even able to read his mind like that. For example, with Gabrielle he would be "she put her hand on my shoulder and it brought me comfort", while with Marius it would "he put his hand on my shoulder to comfort me" (those are made-up examples just to illustrate it, but the books have a lot of receipts if we look at it). It's such a small and yet enormous difference. He was seeing things he wanted to see. By the time they part Marius declares affection to him and we can argue if he were saying the truth or lying, but on the early days? Those were his issues and traumas taking over.

(For context: see this post)

Wow, that's a really nice observation! I don't think I noticed that, but I'm definitely going to analyze it the next time I'm going to re-read The Vampire Lestat. Lestat's relationship with Marius is so interesting, because it often seems Marius is nicer to him than to Armand, but still... it is super weird whatever mentor/pupil or father/son dynamic is going on between Lestat and Marius lol.

For example, Lestat in TVL when he goes badly wounded to Paris (after Claudia and Louis tried to kill him):

Yet not once in all this time did I call out to Marius, did I try to reach him over the miles. I could not beg for his healing blood. Better suffer purgatory for a century than Marius's condemnation. Better suffer the worst loneliness, the worst anguish, than discover that he knew everything I'd done and had long ago turned his back to me.

Hmmm okay, better to suffer purgatory and the worst loneliness than to have Marius, this dude you only knew for a few (intense) days, turn his back on you and express any disappointment. Sure, sounds completely normal.

And again, right before Lestat has to play his part in the trial that will condemn Claudia to death... he is thinking about Marius:

And where was Marius? How many countries, rivers, mountains lay between us? Could he hear and see these things?

However, the dynamic is certainly weird from BOTH sides. Marius spied on Lestat before they even met and knew all the details of his life already... hmmm.... definitely not creepy at all.

And then when Marius shows him Those Who Must Be Kept:

"I don't want to look at them anymore, Marius, honestly I don't," I said, trying to get my hand free, and shaking my head. But he was holding on to me as firmly as a statue might, it seemed [...].

Marius is physically restraining Lestat (for some moments at least but Marius definitely noticed and was doing it on purpose lol)... that's of course not a red flag at all. Another weird moment:

"Marius, please let us go out of here. I beg you. Forgive me, I can't bear it! Please, Marius, let's go." "All right," he said kindly. He squeezed my shoulder. "But do something for me first." "Anything you ask."

Hmmm okay, so Lestat feels like he has to ask permission if he can leave the room and Marius says yes but only if you do something for me. This is super manipulative. And the constant touching? Weird. But somehow Lestat still describes this as "kindly".

[gretchensinister]

20 questions for fic writers

Thank you @marypsue for tagging me!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

732 oh gosh it needs to have text next to it to not show up giant

2. What’s your total word count?

1,316,095 aha you can tell most of my fics are short

3. What fandoms do you write for?

What I am currently preoccupied with is The Dark Crystal/The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance. The vast majority of my fics are for Rise of the Guardians, and I have one fairly substantial fic each for Thor and Venom.

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

Give You Everything, not surprised about this one, it's Eddie/Venom and I published it a little less than four months after Venom came out in theaters. 2. Single Snowflakes, this one is a surprise? It's barely over 1K, T for subject matter, Bunny/Jack where Jack talks about past trauma with Bunny. I wouldn't have written it except that this was part of my project to fill every prompt on Round 1 of the Rise of the Guardians Dreamwidth kinkmeme. I guess it resonated with people??? 3. How Old? Another Bunny/Jack fic, G-rated and very short. 4. What it Means to Ask, yet ANOTHER Bunny/Jack fic, G-rated, but about how serious the concept of being a "mate" is in Pooka culture. How Old? was also related to that. 5. Down and Dirty-a wrestling-type fight between Jack and Bunny turns into sex.

What have we learned? The Jackrabbit fans, they are legion.

5. Do you respond to comments?

For the past several years, yes, pretty much always. Back in 2012 when I was just starting to post on Ao3, I was like unto a nervous deer and sometimes didn't respond. But I did print out all the comments on Without Contraries There Is No Progression (Pitch/Sandy that got me writing big complete things) and put them on my fridge at the time. It helped me get my master's degree.

6. What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The one that comes to the top of my head is Warmer Than I Thought. Jack's dying because he just didn't have enough believers when he became a Guardian. He's not going to come back with continuity of self. Pitch is there to offer him some scant comfort as he goes.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I mostly write happy endings, honestly, but the honor of the most happy and resolved ending goes to His Time, which is chronologically the last fic in my Rise of the Guardians Apotheosis AU. It's a far-distant future, OT8, everyone is together and essentially the pantheon of a new planet they made after Earth is gone due to the expansion of the sun. They are trying to make it go well this time, and so far succeeding.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

The closest thing to hate I ever got was on my explicit Thorki fic...from a person complaining about how much I had Thor and Loki talk to each other.

9. Do you write smut?

I write a lot of explicit sex, yes.

10. Do you write crossovers?

I've written a fair number in my prompt-fill project, but it's not something I'm drawn to write.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I've never known about any of my fics being stolen.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Someone talked to me about translating one of my fics and I was very excited and I said yes. However I don't know what came of that because things happened and I fell out of communication with the potential translator. Maybe they finished it and I don't know about it!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, and I don't think I would, unless it was part of a strictly structured event/project.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

Well, it's Pitch Black/Sandman. Conceptually, the ships I'm drawn to have ties to dichotomies of dark/light, good/evil, cosmic opposites kind of thing. Pitch and Sandy, as personifications of nightmares and dreams, were a perfect vessel for that obsession.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

I told my friends, "I'm not going to rewrite The Phantom of the Opera." And I'm not. But there's a version of PotO that I wanted that uh, isn't what any of the big official versions gave me. So I started writing and I have 49,615 words so far. If I don't find a way to finish it I think I will end up posting it as something permanently unfinished, because there's a lot that I like in it now.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I have been told in a real graduate writing workshop that I have good dialogue. I also like to think I'm pretty good at sensory descriptions.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The things I find extremely difficult are endings and like, plots where things happen--I want so badly to write a big complicated Space Empire story but like. How is does political intrigue? (This house is FEELINGS ONLY.)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

I don't think I'd ever do it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Almost certainly Dragonball Z. If all goes well, my friend and I may have the chance to excavate some of my old notebooks during the holidays and then--it's archive time and that is a threat.

20. Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

It's A Draught of Light, which I love as it is, and for proving that I could write an alternate-world epic fantasy novel as long as I didn't like, admit that's what I was doing. I do admit though that I have an edited version that takes it farther away from being fanfic that I like even better. Maybe I should, hmm, start taking steps to making that version available, if you understand what I mean.

Who do I know writing out there that hasn't been tagged yet? @queerpyracy, @purplebloodedmajesty, @incurablenecromantic

[brambletakato]

if you’re worried the wordcount’s gonna scare away readers, it probably won’t. i’d absolutely read a 2k post if it’s about my guy jean desmond descole sycamore. honestly i’d read a 20k post about him if i could. pinky swear

... ok so i was actually working on this a few months back.. I wrote a very long draft, then I saved it and came back to it, cringed myself out and just. never posted it,,, but after a few months since I figured that its just because I went too deep into it right off the bat instead of giving a ""small"" summary so here we go ATTEMPT 2!!!!

(also if you're an oomf, you're a part of the campaign and you know what orange spoilers mean then do NOT read further pretty please bats my eyelashes at you) AND PROFESSOR LAYTON SPOILERS

So when I talk about campaign Des, I'm referring to a version of Descole that I've roleplayed for almost 5 years now (which is INSANE to me . has it been that long??? whar??? since when??? it's still 2019 is it not????)

The campaign hook is that it's essentially a mass isekai/amnesia plot; Your blorbo from some fandom gets sent into this world patchworked from other universes and whatnot, and they have to figure out their past whilst also finding out how to get back home. Super cheesy stuff on paper ngl, if you read it on some tv series' synopsis you'd probably skip

But its stupid fun to be a bit silly and have Jean Descole from the professor layton series interact with The Mario from the paper mario series and its a guilty pleasure :]

So as for a summary as to what happened over the 5 years (and then I can clarify on any points if anybody is curious (cricket noises));

To clarify who Descole is in this campaign, he only remembers bits of his life in regards to the canon/campaign rp. He remembers having a wife and daughter, but he doesn't remember that they're dead. He remembers his parents getting kidnapped and having to give away his brother, but he doesn't remember what happened to him after that. He remembers bits of his crimes as Descole, but never why other than for either the Azran or Targent. He's right in hindsight, but it's not he's expecting in the present time. He doesn't remember Raymond at all :( poor guy

He also accidentally adopted a young Trucy Wright (like... around 7-8 years old?) because her father is nowhere to be found and his group is actually nuts with close to no responsible adults. ... Actually why don't I talk about them for a sec;

He ended up in a party of like... 9-10 people and yes that is just as insane as it sounds. Some characters would join or leave the party but it has consistently been 7 characters attending excluding Descole. and yes they're all played by different people except mario who's played by the host, so thats like. 8 players at the table at one time

Anyway so this party is pretty much the source of most of his trauma in the campaign funnily enough. One of them blackmails him about his past and then tries to turn the rest of the group against him (meanwhile he dont know SHIT !!! given the amnesia situation), Descole gets defensive and accidentally fans the flames which ends up in the greatest betrayal for him;

When that person shot him in front of the entire group, both friends and foes alike, and they all turned their heads away from him as he bled onto the snow.

I'd love to get further into the party's hijinks(?), how the party came to be, and ultimately where they are now but that's the bare minimum you need to know (and I'd love to answer anything about them!)

Anyway, it's still unknown to this day how this one thing happened, but it's heavily implied to be because of psychological stress mixing with a third secret ingredient; Sometime during all of this, Descole kept finding himself in a room in his sleep-- And often his sleep was plagued by unspeakable nightmares, so this uneventful yet cozy room would've been a comfortable break for him...

... If not for the fact that Desmond lived there, too.

So Desmond is played by the fucking amazing host too and he's apparently a manifestation of his subconscious, and Descole REALLYYYY didn't like that (very much weirded him out, especially since Desmond was extremely blunt and near emotionless; he'd try and give advice but Descole was super nuh-uh about it)

His unease around his subconscious was enough to where he tried to sleep deprive himself to prolong seeing that guy + having nightmares, which that went well (he almost legitimately died lol)

As they have more chances to genuinely talk, their relationship changes. For better or for worse?... Can get further into that if anybody asks lol

Oh one more thing, because the canon roleplay took super long to have sessions, some players opted to have non-canon roleplays to fill in the gaps of time... Which ended up becoming their own side-campaigns that the host would sometimes join in as well. In fact the host has like... A few non-canon campaigns that he's running, and to be honest there's a few non-canon campaigns I end up thinking about a lot

You might've seen the terms "SS", "Chamber RP" or "Persona RP" in my tags and those are some of the non-canon campaigns. Right now we're focused on the canon rp and Chamber RP, which Chamber serves as a tutorial/introduction for a huge overhaul of the ttrpg system we use. We're still in Act I of canon, but Act II is VERY soon which will be using the new system.

SS; Player hosted, everybody fights an evil version of themselves that doesn't have amnesia while trying to take down an international cooperation. This is super fun because Descole in this one finally remembers WHY he did all of those terrible criminal things in the past...

Chamber RP; Host's campaign, amnesia is reversed; You remember your canon counterpart but not the campaign memories... But this doesn't last long as memories of the after starts to seep in. In a similar vibe of the Zero Escape series, you have to find a way out of a sci-fi laboratory while carrying the metaphorical torch of your forgotten hundred other attempts.

Persona RP; Host's campaign; In stark contrast it's super slice of life-y most times lol. Des gets a job as a teacher in this one??? It's set almost 3 years in the future of the canon campaign and as the name implies is SUPER Persona based. There's a strange other plane of existence that supposedly has the answers as to why they have amnesia... And the serial murders that's been going around town.

Anyway I'm definitely leaving out big details for the sake of brevity but I'd be happy to answer anything and thank you if you've read this far!! finally feels good to get this all out ngl

[andvys]

ANDYYYYY BESTIEEEEE. How I missed your angsty writing and the way you break my heart. No but like honestly, I just caught up with the last 3 chapters of We'll burn the Sky and bestie, I wasn't readyyyyyy for the pain you were going to put me through.

I have a lot of things to say so sorry if this is long.

Well first of all, I LOVE petty reader, I can't express how much I gasped when I saw the whole breakfast gate and Chrissy's reaction was just AAAAAAAHHH, she truly is an inspiration. I love that from the 3 series that I've read from you, they are so different. First we have LWTUA Reader, a strong, brave but also really broken girl that just has so much trauma but also so much love to give which is precisely what makes her the fiercest of fighters for who she loves; then we have Everlong reader, heartbroken, insecure but also strong in her own way, is no easy feature to see the man you love break your heart thousands of times and still be able to love him; and now we have this Reader, also traumatized, maybe not in the same way as LWTUA reader, but in a more realistic setting, everything about suicide, an abstent mother but just the lack of love in her life just creates a character that has to have a tough side to survive AND THATS WHY THE PETTINESS WORKS SO GOOD.

(This is more to share my personal experience relating to the part where she remembers what her mother taught her of not letting them see her cry or broken cause I also have that bad trait of not allowing/want to let people see me crying which has led to a lot of difficulty expressing my feelings and somehow I see this reader struggling with everything inside her, yes she is telling eddie how heartbroken she is, how hurt and betrayed he has left her but I also feel the hesitation and how much it would hurt to be betrayed in such a way by the one person you have allowed to share your heart with, idk I might be talking out of my ass here but that's how I interpret it)

Moving on with Steve... oh Steve, beautiful, innocent Steve. GET THAT DICK GIRL. I'm glad it happen, and I'm more glad that Eddie saw it, fuckkkkkkk himmmm. The fact that he didn't like immediately broke up with Chrissy when she showed up left me speechless, men really be telling you they love you like no one else but they'll let their gf (they didn't tell you they have) parade around their relationship and let her cuddle with them and also go to breakfast expecting everything is good and well???? I'm living for the Steve drama here, like he's just so nice, funny and understanding but also good at fucking... HERE YOU GO KING YOU DROPPED THIS 👑

I love Eddie's suffering but it still comforts me this will have a happy ending. Anyways, I know this is already long enough but I just had to say it, I most likely will come back to say more stuff but right now is all I can think off.

As always, love you ANGST QUEEN, you are an amazing writer and I can't wait to read more of any of your stories ❤️

Hiiii! Oh my god 🥹 thank you so much for this! You made my morning 🥹❤️ (and never apologize for long messages/asks, i love them so much)

Petty reader is what we needed in this fic! I didn’t want her to seem like a weak and broken girl, I wanted her to show Eddie that she can be a real bitch!

LWTUA reader will always be my baby, she was so badass and sacrificial but I love her.

And you are 100% right about reader from this fic! She definitely struggles to express her feelings or show emotions in front of others! It’s a bit different with Eddie cause she can’t lie to him about her true feelings but even he gets confused by her cause she keeps jumping back and forth between being vulnerable and acting completely unbothered, he can read her but at the same time he struggles to do so.

What Eddie did with Chrissy was messed up, he wanted to break up with her and yet he made no move to do so when he had the perfect chance to, he is a dumbass. No one can blame reader for not trusting him or believing any of his words.

You will definitely get more of Steve soon! Reader and him will spend a lot of time together 🤭

The happy ending is what we always need! Can’t go without it! Eddie is a dumbass but he will make things right again 🥺

[violetjedisylveon]

Free Fall

Eda raises two gods AU ch 18

Summary: Eda takes care of the kiddos after Enzo's panic attack.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: ⚠implied/referenced trauma, panic attack, mentioned panic attacks, guilt, anxiety, ghosts mentioned⚠

A/N: I'm back with more of this! We've still got 2 more chapters to go before Enzo finally goes to therapy! We're getting close to the DSM 5 chapter and then Enzo is going to therapy and I can have the kiddos not get constantly traumatized for a change!

Enjoy!

Eda Raises Two Gods AU Masterpost

________________________________________________________________________________

Eda honestly should have known better than to trust it. The delicate peace and calm that had filled the owl house in the three or so weeks since their extended visit to Datura was bound to shatter at some point.

She hadn't expected it to happen so soon.

Or be so volatile.

She had thought she'd have more time to figure out, well, something.

She peered into the living room. Enzo was still curled up in a ball on the couch, Gailine and King hadn't moved from their positions at his side. Nibs was firmly wrapped around Enzo's head like the good little emotional support noodle they were.

Eda couldn't stop herself from glancing outside yet again.

She had seen Enzo lose their footing from the living room, and raced out once she registered that he was falling.

Gailine had been closer and instinctively reacted, grabbing Enzo with her abomination prosthetic. Eda had barely had the time to get Gailine out of the way before Enzo's reaction.

Whether it was the fall or the abomination goo or something else entirely, Eda didn't know, but something had set off Enzo worse than she'd ever seen.

They had violently pulled earth and rock and trees out of the ground and surrounded themself in a protective bubble of debris. She had been able to use her own magic to slow down the chaotic storm enough to reach the kid, but it was definitely the worst reaction she'd seen yet.

What was worse than his reaction was the look on Enzo's face when they realized they weren't alone, their small, broken sobs, the overwhelming relief that flickered through the intense fear and panic in his red eyes, the way they had melted into her arms when she deemed it safe enough to approach. That wasn't something she could ever forget.

Someone had messed this kid up badly, so badly that they tore the earth up with a panic attack.

Eda couldn't put it off any longer. She needed to talk with Clover about what the next steps should be.

And she had to somehow convince the Ocelat that Enzo was still a normal witchling and not… not… whatever they really were.

Speaking of Clover, the Ocelat came up behind her.

"Would you like to talk?" She asked softly.

"Probably should." Eda shrugged.

The whole situation had been terrifying, but she was feeling oddly numb, her emotions felt muffled, they were still there and she did feel them, but they weren't like they should be. She figured Clover would know something about that.

She was extremely grateful that Enzo had this big massive panic attack when Clover was here. Without the Ocelat's instructions on what to do and how to help Enzo with the adrenaline hangover(which was apparently a thing), Eda truly didn't know what she would have done.

She probably would have freaked out and made the situation worse.

She sat down at the table with Clover.

"How are you feeling?" She asked.

"How do you think I'm feeling? My kid almost -no- they did fall off a cliff!" She snapped.

"Yes, they did -and it wasn't your fault so don't even think about blaming yourself- but how are you feeling right now." Clover said.

Eda sighed and rubbed her arms, running her fingers over her thin scars, letting them give her their odd comfort.

"Numb? I feel it, but it's not really there." Eda admitted.

"Would you describe the feeling as dissociation?"

A brief spike of irritation surged and she could feel the owl beast howling in the back of her mind. It had been since she saw Enzo fall but its influence on her was subdued. It was yelling for her to take care of their kids but not taking any action itself. The bird brain's smarter than it seems.

"I, maybe? I don't really know, you are the expert on this." She snapped again.

"Yes, I am, but my normal methods are a lot harder when you have a wild animal in your head." Clover said calmly.

She extended her hand, a small flower bloomed in the center of her palm, its vines wrapped around her hand.

"Would you like me to try?" She offered.

"Yeah, that's gonna be a hard no." Eda said.

Clover shrugged, the flower retracted.

"You're experiencing some emotional detachment, in this case it's a short term response to a stressful situation. I'd prepare yourself, speaking from experience, you're going to get hit hard later." Clover told her.

Eda nodded. She could handle that when she had too. Clover pulled a note quill out of her bag. The quill floated in the air with a soft glow.

"Now, there are some things we need to talk about with Enzo." She stated.

"Yeah, there are." Eda eyed the innocently floating quill distrustfully.

"Okay look, I know what Enzo did was really strange and-"

"It wasn't that strange, sad for sure, but it's quite common for a young witchling's magic to spasm during a panic attack." Clover said, smoothly interrupting her.

Eda scanned the Ocelat's face, gauging her reaction and intentions. Clover was remarkably calm for what just happened, but if she remembered her school days right, Clover had usually been calm in the heat of action and the immediate aftermath. She was grounded, calm and collected in the moment, and would freak out later.

It was probably part of her job.

Clover leaned forwards and adjusted her glasses.

"I won't ask, you don't need to explain. Personally, it's none of my business, I can easily chalk it up to a very powerful witchling and nothing else." Clover said quietly.

"Thank you, for understanding." Eda said after a quiet moment of processing.

"No problem." Clover's more chipper tone returned.

"Now, let's get started."

Clover pulled a rather thick file out of her bag and slid it across the table to her.

XXX

Clover's alarm went off.

Eda glanced at the clock, it was past eight, well past the kids' bedtime. And Clover had a late meeting today, a personal tragedy struck a friend of hers and she had offered to help xyr.

She closed her file and passed it back to Clover. They had gotten through a decent amount of the more important stuff, though she knew all the paperwork in the world wasn't enough to prepare her for what she had to do next.

Talk to Enzo.

Eda looked over at the kids, still curled up on the couch in the exact same position.

"The hardest part of this is getting them to understand it will help." Clover said somberly.

Eda glanced over her shoulder, Clover was checking the pockets of her bag but staring out to the setting sun.

"So many of them don't want to be there, or don't want to talk about it because if they don't it can't hurt them. It's a long process." Clover sighed.

The Ocelat closed her bi colored eyes and took in a deep, slow breath. She blinked open her eyes, casting a glance out towards the kids, specifically her kid, who was still holding onto Enzo. With just one arm, her prosthetic got damaged… maybe for the better.

"She won't want to leave." Clover muttered to herself.

"Do you have the time for that?" Eda questioned. Gailine could be extremely stubborn, and Clover was on a tight deadline.

Clover glanced over at her, clearly she hadn't expected to be heard.

"Do you want to have someone come pick her up?" Eda suggested.

"Eibhlín is out of town until the weekend, and most of my family is busy preparing for the Moon Festival -shit I gotta get ready for that to, oh stars-"

"How about she stays the night?" Eda asked, cutting Clover off before she could descend into a spiral.

Clover shot her a quizzical look.

"Are you sure about that?" She asked.

"The nest might be a little crowded but it's fine." Eda shrugged.

"Besides, I don't think any of them are coming apart for a while." She gestured to the pile of kids on the couch.

"I- you're right. Gailine won't leave." Clover nodded.

The Ocelat turned back to grab her bag and froze halfway, staring out the window. Eda followed her line of sight, she didn't see anyone coming.

"What is it?" She asked, turning back to the Ocelat.

Clover frowned, the setting sun reflected in her glasses.

"You have Spirit's Flowers growing on your window box." She said seriously.

Eda checked and sure enough, the delicate, otherworldly flowers were growing. How she hadn't noticed them before now was a mystery. An inkling of worry broke through her lingering numbness.

Everyone's heard the ghost stories, and knew the signature sign of a haunting. Malicious or not, it was concerning. Spirits were fickle and unpredictable, even if you were gifted in Oracle magic.

"How long?" Clover asked.

"They weren't there when I left for Datura's." Eda answered.

The Oracle was silent for long enough to get Eda even more worried. A vine slowly stretched out from her hand towards the Spirit's Flowers.

"… this complicates things…" Clover muttered.

The vine pushed between the windows and brushed against the stem of a flower before snapping back. Spirits didn't like their flowers being messed with.

"I don't have the time for an in depth survey, but as far as I can tell right now, whatever's behind it isn't expressly malevolent. It's content, passive for now." Clover said.

"You haven't had any odd activity or haunting symptoms, have you?" She asked as she walked to the door.

"I haven't noticed anything different." Eda admitted.

"I have." The door swung open and Hooty pushed them both outside.

"What?" Eda snapped.

The bird tube nodded confidently.

"I was sleeping and they asked if I minded them being around. They said they wouldn't cause any trouble, I can barely tell they're here most of the time. They come and go." Hooty said.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Eda growled.

"They aren't a problem, they just watch, they come at night." Hooty gave her the bird worm version of a shrug.

Eda opened her mouth to ask Hooty more about the spirit that he had decided to let into her home, but Clover suddenly yelped and drew her attention away.

"Shit! I gotta go I'm late already- write down what he said, I'll look at it later- bye -I'll come by to pick Gailine up tomorrow, I hope Enzo gets some sleep tonight, bye!" Clover waved as she left.

Eda watched her leave, just to make sure she didn't get herself hurt. Gailine really was like her mom in that way.

She waited for a while longer then went in. It was way past bedtime.

She knelt down in front of them. Enzo blinked, the far away look in their eyes faded into recognition. King was already asleep and Gailine was too sleepy to notice her, so she tapped the kid's shoulder.

Gailine jolted awake and stared up at her with tired eyes.

"Clover had to go, she'll come pick you up tomorrow, you can stay over tonight." Eda said softly.

Gailine nodded sleeping, she shifted her focus to Enzo.

"Does that sound alright, Starshine?" She asked them.

Enzo stared at her for a moment then nodded. Maybe she was seeing things but it looked like the tiniest bit of tension left Enzo's body.

"Alright, let's go to bed." She said.

Eda guided the trio of sleepy children up the stairs into her bedroom. Enzo didn't like to be alone at night, so she had moved their mattress into her room a while ago. Tonight was definitely going to be a nest night.

Maybe I should make a nest for the kid… that's a thought for another time.

Eda sent Gailine to the bathroom with a pair of shorts and large t-shirt she had laying around that she could sleep in. It would be big on the six year old, but it would work for the night. Enzo changed in the closet and came out in a t-shirt with a crescent moon and stars pattern, their shorts were nebula patterned.

Eda got the nest set up for the added company, she had a shit ton of cushions, pillows and blankets in her room. She used all of them to line the nest. She already had the room stocked with fresh bunches of Hyssopi and Sage Nettles to ward off any potential nightmares.

After a day like this her kids needed some good sleep.

Nibs, Syvne and Aeronwen were already squished together in an adorable noodle pile in the corner of the nest when Gailine sleepily stumbled back into the room.

Enzo stepped in carefully and Gailine fell into the nest from how tired she was. The Ocelat just flipped over onto her side and stayed where she fell.

Eda was already wearing comfy clothes that she more often than not was too lazy to change out of. She joined the kids in the nest with King.

The little gremlin scurried over to Enzo and curled up on his lap. On instinct Enzo ran a hand through King's fur, gently tugging out the small knots and tangles that accumulated throughout the day. Their other hand was holding something close to their chest.

It was their hat, the one they'd been wearing when she had first come across them. She had their old clothes in a basket in the closet, just in case they wanted or needed them again for whatever reason. Enzo didn't wear them anymore, he would sit by the basket sometimes with a far off look on their face. They would take the hat out and wear it around the house. It was a bit of a comfort object for them, maybe it was the smell, even after she washed them it still carried a distinct, soft and sweet berry scent, and a vanilla scent with very slight alcoholic undertone.

Enzo also carried that odd berry and vanilla smell, but they also had a bit of a salty breeze smell mixed in, just like King, and something else she couldn't place.

I should put a spell on their hat so they can take it with them. Eda thought as she reached out to her child. Enzo jolted at her touch, then relaxed once he realized it was her.

"Are you going to be alright tonight?" She asked softly, Gailine was already asleep on her section of the nest.

Enzo stared at her, fist clenching around their hat.

"It's okay if you're not." Eda said quickly.

They took a second, then nodded. They put their hat on and pulled it down over their eyes.

" … im sorry…" they whispered so quietly she barely heard it.

"Sorry?!! The hatchling has nothing to be sorry about! Not the hatchling's fault! Never the hatchling's fault!" The owl beast screeched in her mind.

Eda waited a moment for the bird brain to be done raging.

"Can I hold you?" She asked.

Enzo peered up at her in surprise, unreadable emotions flickered in his eyes before they nodded and scouted over to her. Eda wrapped her arms around her kid and pulled them closer, they grabbed onto her shirt tightly.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about. It's not your fault, that will never be your fault. I will never get mad at you for it." Eda whispered.

Enzo tightened their grip, their body trembled with silent sobs. Eda rubbed her kid's back and whispered soft reassurances until they slipped into a light sleep. By then, both King and Gailine had migrated over to them and joined them in a sort of cuddle pile.

Eda made sure everyone was settled and safe before she let herself go to sleep, if anything happened she'd wake up in an instant.

Her kids were safe tonight.

XXX

Another of those cursed flowers had managed to weed its way into his study. Philip sneered at the starkly colored flower, insulting him with its mere existence.

She was still around, that spiteful witch was refusing to let up.

He burned the flower away with a simple fire glyph. The ghostly flower shriveled up into a pile of ashes. He stomped on the ashes, crushing the existence of the flower under his heel.

The satisfaction of crushing her soon faded, it wasn't a true victory. She may be dead but she still would not give up on her mission.

She would come back, she always came back and never let up. It was impossibly annoying at this point.

Philip turned away from the crushed ashes and went back to his studies. He was still recovering from his setback; the Collector hadn't given him all the information he needed before fleeing. He still had a few wrinkles to iron out, but he was making good progress without the pathetic brat.

He spotted something blond out of the corner of his eye and glanced up, expecting to find Hunter sneaking around again, they all had their little phases he had to endure through.

But it wasn't Hunter when he looked up.

It was him.

Standing there with that cold, bitter anger on his face as he silently stared down at him, that bloody knife floating above his head and that blood staining his chest.

He had swore that his crimes would haunt him. His near dying breath was a curse against his own brother. A curse destined to silently, bitterly haunt him forever.

Caleb's anger had always been blisteringly cold.

Hissing started in his ears as he stared down the glowing specter. The hissing built up to a ferocious, fiery screeching that threatened to make his ears burst.

Ghostly fires erupted out of the ground, he ignored the burning feeling of his skin and waved the unholy flames away. It never worked.

The screeching reached its peak and in a burst of light, Caleb was gone with his witch.

In his place was a pair of those stupid flowers, always taunting him.

________________________________________________________________________________

Caleb and Evelyn's favorite afterlife couple's activity: making Philip's life hell! 

Be like Caleb and Evelyn, haunt your/your husband's murder ✨together✨

Gailine is cat :3 and therefore very physically affectionate with everyone. She is just cuddly, like my cat who loves snuggles. Eibhlín is Gailine's other mom, she is a botanist and horticulturist.

Alright I hope you all have a good day, whatever that is for you!

VJS Out!

[emilyrosediary]

relationship trauma aftermath

I grew up in a happy home. My parents are together, therefore, according to psychology a nuclear family. I was shown a good example of what love is and was part of a church with families full of love. There was stability in my childhood. I was cherished, I was cheered on, and I had parents who showed up for me. I never had to question what I was eating that night or if my parents were going to be there to tuck me in. I had it really good. My dad loves my mom and vice versa. They took care of each other and have been together through a lot. I have dreamed of a safe love like that.

From the outside, there should be no reason I ended up in the kinds of relationships I found myself in as a teenager. But I went through my fair sure of traumatizing relationships at a way too young age.

I had my first kiss at thirteen and following that he became my boyfriend. I was in eighth grade so this wasn't going to end in marriage but he was my first boyfriend and that had a big impact on me. If you ask if I loved him, I'd say yes. Although love for me at nineteen looks different than it did at thirteen and will look different when I'm thirty. He was my first love and the first guy to emotionally manipulate me. I assume he got away with it because I lacked emotional maturity and didn't have anything to compare it to in my life. He would be super sweet then cheat on me or threaten me at times to get his way. Yet I always found myself running back to him. No matter how much he hurt me, I loved him, right? I assumed the push and pull was what love was: the give and take. But I gave everything for nothing but abuse in return. He mentally and emotionally destroyed me for his own benefit. But that's what men with emotional sledgehammers do. Break you down until there's nothing left. Eventually, he broke me to the point that I was terrified of him and hated him.

Then I met my second love. We started dating right before I left for college. We’d fight, and I'd get ignored for days. I'd spend my days crying begging for him to love me and give me an ounce of attention. Guess that's how I learned to bottle my emotions so well. There was never an emphasis on discussing issues. We would just brush them under the rug till he gets pissed and screams at me till I cried begging him to stop and apologizing for stuff I didn't do. Just like my first boyfriend, there was no lack of emotional manipulation. We had some really good times and by no means was I perfect but at least I can say I didn't make him feel worthless. He couldn't say the same. For an eighteen-year-old, I became very comfortable with feeling like shit and being a doormat.

To play devil's advocate here. I am imperfect. I was not a perfect girlfriend at thirteen or nineteen, and I never will be. I adapted to be extremely defensive. The walls have always been way up for me. How my first relationship went impacted my second, and honestly impacted all of my relationships. By the time I learned to stand up for myself, that's all I did. Even if I didn't necessarily need to. I let one relationship as an innocent little girl impact the way I love forever. I am not blameless for hurting other people while I was hurting, I'm healing too. I've caused my own amount of damage trying to love after them. 

This is just the short version of the relationship issues. No, I was never hit, but I got emotionally punched in the gut by men too insecure to deal with their own problems. I pray every day that they get help and are healed. And I pray no other girl will ever have to go through what I went through with them. Maybe watching me break from their very glance to then being the one strong enough to look them in the eyes and say goodbye was what they needed. Maybe they got their shit together. I'll probably be healing from what they did to me for the rest of my life. Trying to erase them and the patterns they made me believe were normal from my memory. But I can say every day I'm healing and trying to be a better person. Making sure my friends don't get trapped as I did, and learning to let the people who actually love me, love me.

I'm unsure if I am ready to love even now. I know what it feels like to love, but I still associate it with eventual heartbreak. That's most likely why I run, it's a defense from what won't happen but I am convinced I will. I'm healing at nineteen from teenage boys' blows. And maybe one day I'll be able to trust the words of songs where they stay and love you right. Right now I just know word-for-word country breakup anthems. Because when you open your heart to the wrong people they crack it and soon enough it's nothing but a scrambled mess along a chest cavity. The remains of a nineteen-year-old girl who has always chosen to love the wrong people. The people who carry around emotional sledgehammers. So when someone walked up with a sewing kit I was not sure what to do.

There will be someone who wants to love me. They'll be ready to pick up the pieces and sew back together a heart they didn't break. They'll be my best friend, and I won't have to worry about them hurting me. I know there's someone. And I know one day I'll be able to love without running. I'm so tired of running. I just want to be ready to accept healthy love. I've watched so many people reach it and I want that to be me. I want my future kids to look at how much my spouse loves me and reach for that. I never want my kids to settle. I want them to feel love. I want them to feel safe. I want them to listen to love songs and understand them. And I want them to think, “wow I want a love like mom and dad”, I want them to see my marriage as healthy. I want THE love, the one that feels like home because I finally believe I deserve this safe love.

[silentmoths]

First of all i want to say that i absolutly love your writing! Is soo good!!!

And if your requests are open i'd like to ask for platonic zhongli x child reader (if u r not confortable with that just ignore this ask)

Zhongli found child reader somewhere alone and took them home where child stays. After some time zhongli finds adoption papers in childs room. Child wants to ask zhongli to adopt them and already has the papers tk ask him (since zhongli likes contracts)

Thank u so much

oh OH NO THATS CUTE ABSOLUTELY Zhongli x Child!Reader

Platonic, fluff, comfort, Gender Neutral Reader

To say Zhongli's life had taken a bit more of a turn than even the ex-Archon had expected was an understatement. But really what else was he to do when he had come across the collapsed, burnt out home in the countryside, the child screaming for parents who's bodies he'd later found in the rubble.

The way they'd clung so tightly to his coat when he'd called out to them, tears streaming down their filthy, soot-ridden face. It didn't sit right with him, leaving them at an orphanage; try as he might during his days as archon, orphanages and childrens homes could never provide everything a child needed to thrive, he'd worked with plenty incognito over the centuries; it was a hard fact of life that even the archon struggled to come to terms with.

Besides, he had the means, he had a job and a home, mora and food, had a hand in raising young Ganyu (well, more like glorified babysitting for cloud retainer, but the experience was still something he looked fondly upon), plus, he wanted to know what it truly meant to be mortal, what better way to learn than parenthood?

He'd never expected it to mean so much.

----

The first months were difficult for you both, naturally. He was very new to children, let alone one who'd just lost everything in such a violent way, your emotional outbursts were...difficult for him to understand for the most part; crying in the night? sure, nightmares were common after trauma, but crying when he made you a meal you'd often eaten with your parents before the incident? that took a little longer for him to understand.

But soon enough, days melted to weeks, to months and now, nearly two years. Director Hu did so love her newest little consultant whenever you begged to come to work with him (schooling was important to, but he could indulge a day of playing hooky every once in a while, plus it was near guarenteed that the moment you walked in the door, you'd be all but kidnapped by the young parlour director to go pranking). It was rare that he found himself home before school ended for the day, and yet, that's exactly where he'd found himself.

Walking in the door, he catches himself before calling the usual 'I'm home!' into the empty apartment. It was strange, but not totally unwanted; a moment to himself to do things for himself.

and yet, after the first cup of tea, he finds himself wanting the clock to strike three already, so atleast he knew he didn't have to wait long until he had someone to talk to. For someone so young, you certainly were a quick study, any and all lectures you'd sat in on at the funeral parlour you could repeat with scary accuracy, so at the very least, Zhongli knew you'd understand if you asked about his day and he accidentally went on a tangent about a certain ceremony.

a distraction is what he needed...and the apartment could do with a bit of a tidy, a quick dust, put a start to dinner, make some tea and snacks for when you got home...yes that sounded like a grand idea.

He'd never expected mortal life to be so...domestic. But he'd found a certain level of joy in nurturing another, watching you grow and thrive, watching your talents and skills bloom; you'd make an amazing consultant yourself one day, or perhaps something else, the sky was the limit.

----

It wasn't often he invaded the sancturary of your room, honestly compared to most books he'd read, and the advice he'd been given from other parents, you kept your room neater than he ever expected, even still, the blinds and ceiling skirting could use a dusting. It's as he reaches up to bust a cobweb forming in the corner that he knocks a folder from a shelf, the contents falling to the floor and spilling out onto the floor, oops.

He's quick to deal with the cobweb before bending to collect the papers, a school assignment perhaps? He quickly glances over them and the moment his eyes land on the words 'Certificate of Adoption' he feels his very blood freeze.

Original Name of child: Date of Birth: Place of Birth: Name of Birth Father: Name of Birth Mother: Name of Adoptive Father: Name of Adoptive Mother:

Almost all of it was filled in neat, careful handwriting...how long had you had these? It felt like he'd stumbled upon something he wasn't meant to see, and yet...

It's not until a quiet gasp in the doorway pulls him from his thoughts that he even realises your home, looking up to meet your wide eyes, he hasn't seen that look in a long time...in fact he hasn't seen it since the day he'd found you; fear, insecurity, anxiety as your eyes slowly drift between the papers in his hand and his face.

"I...I um...I've...."

Ah, that's something he knows, the little, anxious stutter when you obviously had something to say, but didn't know how to word it; now this he knew how to handle. He gently takes your bag from your hand and places it on the floor, guides you to the kitchen table and leaves the papers there while he brews some tea, you preferred yours with cream and two sugars.

"How long have you had these, darling?" He finally asks as he takes a seat opposite you.

"C-couple of months...X-Xingqiu helped me get them..."

Ah, the young, second son of the commerce guild, an interesting little boy, certainly wise beyond his years, somehow it did not surprise him that he was your source of such important documents.

"Are you...mad at me?" Now that question catches him totally off guard.

"Mad? why would I ever be mad?"

You're picking at your cuticles again, an old habit that you'd never quite grown from when you were stessing.

"I...I thought that...w-well we're always learning that Liyue is the land of contracts a-and...I know you said I could stay forever but... we never..s-signed a contract."

The words knock the air from his lungs. His child, his darling, who had no idea who he even was, wanted to confirm their relationship him in the best language Liyue spoke: a contract.

"And you thought that...for some reason...I would not say yes?" The quiet nod is all he needs. One hand reaches forward for the papers, the other for the pen he always kept in his coat; a very special pen that he, as Rex Lapis, as Morax himself used to sign his own contracts; the ink derived from his very own blood, as he easily reads over and fills in the missing details.

You watch in silence, watching as he elegantly fills in the blanks without missing a single beat, the entire contract filled in mere moments; missing only one more signature, one neither of you could supply.

"Ms. Yanfei should still be at the office if we hurry." He smiles, rising from his chair. You wanted to go now, you really did, but instead of following him, you find yourself collapsing into him, clinging to his coat and bursting into tears, two months of shuffling your feet, of anxiety and insecurity gone, just like that, it may have been a few simple strokes of a pen to him, but to you it felt like an avalance falling from your shoulders.

Strong arms easily scoop you up and into his chest so you can cry a little more comfortably into the crook of his neck instead as he hums a quiet tune, the same one he would hum every time you'd woken from a nightmare or had a bad day at school, all while he rubs your back.

Perhaps the signature from Ms. Yanfei could wait until tomorrow, neither of you say it, but tonight seems like a Father/Child night, so after you've calmed, you watch as he places the papers right by the front door, setting you down, you know the look in his eye, it's one of those nights; so you rush off to get changed and to wash your splotchy face.

"What do you fancy tonight, darling? Dessert first and work backwards?" You giggle, sometimes your friends said Zhongli was kind of intimidating, that he seemed stern and a party pooper; but that was just how he looked.

to you? Zhongli was kind, he was patient, he helped you with your math homework and enjoyed listening to your stories, you enjoyed going to the funeral parlour with him. He made you feel safe and loved, you still missed your parents, and he was always there in those moments when it got to be a bit too much; he never tried to keep you away from your old home, if you wanted to go visit, he'd make a day of it, you'd take inscense and flowers and you'd tell your parents what you'd been up to.

So, as he easily lifts you onto his shoulders so you could see over the general bustle of liyue, you smile contently, resting your chin on his head.

"Love you...dad."

You feel him hum contently.

"I love you too."

[multifandoms27-blog]

OMG THE LAST HCS WERE SOO GOOD( ꈍᴗꈍ)( ꈍᴗꈍ) I really like your writing, it's very comforting. And yes, you write pretty fast! To do even half your work, I probably have to write for a few days (perfectionism obliges).

I come here with another idea! Not yet modern!Ling ideas tho (but I'll request it if you're not tired of me by that time haha x)) I was thinking of hcs or a scenario with Ling and a jealous reader. Not the cute kind of jealous, or the mad kind— more of the anxious, scared kind of jealous. Like (gn)reader having serious self esteem issues but not wanting to like restrain their partner, scared of losing them type of deal. Angst? Fluff? Comfort? I say you decide what you'd prefer. Thank you very much!! (◍•ᴗ•◍)❤️

AAAAAAA THANK YOUUU <3333 And of course I'm not tired of you!! I'll never tire of you and lil' Ling!!

Sorry this took me a bit! The boyfriend got sick and I've been taking care of him

~*~*~*

Content: Ling Yao x GN reader!

Warnings: Detailed process of a panic attack, doubtful thoughts, but GREED COMES TO THE RESCUE, also Lust is her own warning tbh (I love her but damn-)

Notes: I've been mentally not feeling it, and I relate a little too hard to this ask, as sometimes I'll get like this with my boyfriend. I used the end to comfort myself lol. Dw, my boyfriend treats me right!! My brain is just a silly little goose trying to process 10 years of trauma lol

~*~*~*

Ling isn't gonna notice baby boy, baby

I headcanon Lan Fan as being somewhere between a little fruity and all the way fruity, so I don't think you'd have much to worry about with her

Riza is pretty stoic and never interacts with Ling

I don't like Winry

Let's just picture: Lust is still alive, and begins interacting with Ling cause he has Greed's philosopher's stone

It doesn't even have to be anything inherently romantic. Lust is forced to interact with Ling because he holds her "brother"

But it was one comment from her that set you off

She was in the other room with Greed, and you'd decided to listen in. They were talking about someting with Father and some guy named Hoenheim

"Honestly?" Lust said. "Your new host is really cute...too bad he's so young."

"Hm? Oh, yeah." Greed brushed her comment off and continued the conversation like before

Greed knows you and Ling are a thing and has your back. Plus Ling was freaking the fuck out in their shared headspace.

But, that was enough for you to creep away from the door and sit on the couch. Lust was attractive, and her main game was seducing men to get what she wanted...

What if she wants Ling?

What if she convinces Ling that she's better?

What if Ling changes his mind and wants to be with her instead...?

So many what if's swam through your head. Your heart thumped rapidly in your chest, your lungs feeling like they weren't getting enough air, your eyes stinging with tears as constant images of Ling and Lust together began to haunt you.

Slowly curling up into yourself, you turned so your face was plastered into the couch cushion

The ringing in your ears grew louder and you soon tuned out Lust and Greed, now being replaced by image after image of Ling with Lust

You refused to let tears fall, not wanting to bother Ling with this whenever Lust leaves and Greed puts Ling back

You didn't know how long you'd laid there until a pair of hands landed on your side. You jumped and turned. Ling's eyes were still a mahogany red, which meant Greed was still in control.

"Hey kid. From the look on your face, I'm assuming you heard what Lust said."

"Is it that obvious...?" You say, rubbing your eye.

Greed patted your head. "Sorry, kid."

"Sorry for wha-"

Greed had closed his eyes and allowed Ling to take over again. The prince pounced on you, rubbing his cheek with yours, ecstatic to be back in control

Ling's memory is spotty when Greed is in control, so he didn't know you'd heard Lust's comment

You hesitantly wrapped your arms around Ling, mumbling a low "hi"

Ling paused. "I know that tone. What's wrong, honey?"

Ling, your ever doting boyfriend, looked at you with concern.

"No, I'm...I'm fine."

"You sure? Your breathing heavier than normal..."

You gave Ling a fake smile. "Yeah, yeah."

Ling, not believing you, hugged you tighter. "You can tell me, hun. Nothing's gonna happen, okay?"

You trusted him, of course, but your brain and heart were telling you no... "I...I'm worried I'm gonna lose you to Lust."

son of a bitch-

"Oh...so you heard her?" Ling looks down at you. "Listen, I love you, okay? Not her. She can go try to hook up with someone else for all I care. Besides, this body currently inhabits her brother, so I don't think she's thinking anything in particular..."

Ling snickered at the end, kissing your forehead. "I promise, I'd never let her get close to me. Greed and her just needed to talk about something is all. I love you, okay?"

Numbly, you nodded, laying your head on his chest. "I love you too."

"Now, let's watch a movie and order in, yeah? I'll get your favorite~!"

He suddenly got up and moved to your TV, messing with it, then fiddling with his phone and ordering your favorite food for delivery. As you watched him, you felt the oxygen slowly return to your chest, and your muscles relaxed. You could trust Ling, he loved you. He really did. He wouldn't be doing this if he wasn't.

"Hey, Ling."

"Yeees, sugarplum?" Ling looked up from his spot on the floor.

"I love you."

Ling giggles. "I love you too! Food'll be here in fifteen, okay?"

[nebulous-tundra]

tbs honestly upsets me so much because lauren IS actually pretty good at representing certain things entirely on a character basis (damien is actually a really good portrayal of a neglect survivor who develops harmful maladaptions to survive, and also how difficult and frustrating it can be to stop said maladaptions when you have absolutely no frame of reference for what relationships of any kind are supposed to look like, which doesn't go away during adulthood even if you're expected to "know better" without actual guidance (which people don't realize having learned those things from experience growing up because they take it for granted) and also being in a position where you feel safe and comfortable enough to be able to drop them in the first place!) but the way she USES those characters makes me want to grit my teeth until they turn to dust ("damien is Bad because he's the Bad Kind of abuse survivor and those survivors are Bad and they Don't Want to do better and that's why they won't (nevermind that nobody will help them no matter how much they reach out ignore that)"), but the BIGGEST sticking point for me was mostly how damien (who has at most interpersonal power over others) gets run through the wringer even though he clearly DOES want to do better, whereas wadsworth (who has enormous systematic power being basically the CEO of a big government organization that MEDICALLY TORTURES PEOPLE) gets away with basically a slap on the wrist because Famiwy. like this could honestly be commentary on how traumatized mentally ill people with maladaptions and no societal supports are often failed by the psychiatric system and even further traumatized by having the rug pulled out from under them at all times and big important people in powerful positions in corporations are allowed to just do whatever they want without real consequences but instead it's a W because damien is an Icky Mentally Ill Man and wadsworth is a Girlboss. i'm so sorry i've unleashed this here something was Awoken in me

lauren IS actually pretty good at representing certain things entirely on a character basis [...] but the way she USES those characters makes me want to grit my teeth until they turn to dust ("damien is Bad because he's the Bad Kind of abuse survivor and those survivors are Bad and they Don't Want to do better and that's why they won't

YES! YEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS ! i think TBS was meant to be a story about queer/neurodivergent people and an empowering story about how they Stick It To The Man......but end up repeating this issue of accountability in society in the most ironic way possible. i'm glad i'm not the only one who goes a little nuts at the topic because it's honestly just SO FRUSTRATING.

manipulate mansplain malewife Damien gets more abandonment trauma as well as has to relearn how to LIVE(which i'm sure all of us who had a full education and resources still struggle with)whereas gaslight gatekeep girlboss Wadsworth is on bad terms w her nephew : [[[[[[ both are found narratively Bad and yet for whatever reason only Damien is the one to face any real consequences.......as someone who in his last episode revealed a very deep want for personal growth and actually displayed some.........and as a neurodivergent guy........and a queer.............and a child neglect victim to the most severe degree.........................and now poor and broke........... but hey. that's a W for the rest of the cast right. why show a story about love and growth in even the most unlikeliest of people in your story about love and growth.........

i believe we're entitled to be at least a little bit unhinged by this.