#and you know what? I AM cute. Can't believe i ever thought otherwise

[amarenamoccha]

I used to crave validation so bad when i was younger, especially from men, because i felt ugly and unlovable and unworthy. I'm so glad I'm growing out of that mindset and am finally treating myself the way i should have from the start. Let's be honest, there is no amount of love another person can pour into you that will ever feel like enough if you keep constantly draining your cup by hating yourself. Nowadays outside validation just feels like a little extra boost.

[happylittleshrub]

Rocket Plushie Review

My thoughts on Rocket plushies! I only own some of these so for those I'll go into a little more detail, but most of this is just based on vibes lol

This isn't in any sort of ranking or order

I love this one! His fur feels so soft and he sits on my desk and keeps me company. Reminds me of Pokemon's "Sitting Cuties" line of plushes. Sometimes he'll fall over a little but that's really only if he's sitting on a more uneven surface like a bed or sofa, on my desk he sits fine

This one looks like one of those Littlest Pet Shop toys. So many of the other Rocket plushies look good I don't know what happened here.

Sweet, sleepy boy I love to cuddle him ❤️ Both huggable and snuggable. My sleep has improved 120% since getting him 10/10 would recommend

This is my son my precious little child I love him I want the world for him he is the greatest thing in all of existence. He is so very soft and the perfect size to hug and to hold. ❤️

This is the first Rocket plush I ever got he is very special to me 🥹 I like the chibified design, very adorable! He does have a hard time sitting up on his own because of his disproportionately sized head, I usually have to lean him against something. His ears are velvety soft!

Tiny gremlin, an actual creature. He is full of bad ideas. I like that he comes with a tiny gun

This one looks kind of like a dog more so than a raccoon. Maybe it's just this picture. Idk he still cute tho

This one is good but something about his eyes feels a little off. I don't know if I trust him

Absolutely adorable! He has Animal Crossing vibes. I would buy him but he's over forty dollars 🙃

This one is cute but uh... this is legally distinct off-brand Rocket Wolf not Rocket Raccoon

He is 100% friend shaped I love him I want to give him a hug

"I can't believe I'm taking orders from a hamster." -Some Nova Corps Guy. I like this little dude, he's smol and squishy like a marshmallow!

This one is cute, but I do kinda wish his face wasn't so flat, otherwise no notes

This is so adorable wth you can carry Rocket around on your back like he's a sleepy little child I love it

Bro's lookin' like a finger puppet. He's very small and cute!

This Rocket looks like he needs some love. Well, that's all Rockets but especially this one. Looks like he'd be standing alone a street corner somewhere. Someone needs to bring him home and make him soup

I feel like this one should be the reference image next to the word Blorbo in a dictionary. This is the embodiment of blorbo and all other blorbos should bow to him

Shadow the Hedgehog wannabe. Gritty 90s reboot edgelord

This Rocket is smiling but I feel like he's screaming on the inside while this rando pulls on his ears

Football Head here stares into my soul. He can and will beat me up

Cute but not the best. I'd probably put him in a B-Tier (Shrub, you said you weren't going to do rankings!)

Adorable little guy! He has tiny magnets in his hands with which to hold batteries and other stolen items. You can also buy little outfits for these types of plushies so 20/10! During the colder months I let him ride around in my hoodie ^-^

This one is up to no good I love the mischief in his expression lol

I love Disney Tsum Tsum so this little peanut is an absolute winner in my book

"Until a second ago I thought you were a build-a-bear."

"MAYBE I AM"

He's so sweet and adorable would absolutely bring him home and love him forever (would be even better if he came with sound like some build-a-bears do)

WHO PUT HIM IN THE DRYER???

The way they did his eyes reminds me of Spiderman

He's a sweet boy he just needs someone looking out for him and to be his conscience and stop him from stealing batteries 💛

FERAL

Bro's got them sparkly anime eyes. Also sideburns

Alright I've reached the photo limit so that's all for now. If you read all the way down here thanks for checking out my silly ramblings!

[699charcoalp]

All alone with you

Fanwork about Lincoln and my MC Remus. A lot of grammar problems(because English is not my first language) and ooc, my fault.

Title source: All Alone With You by Egoist.

"Lincoln." someone said in the room. "I am here," Lincoln asked, "Want something?" "Nothing," Lincoln's beloved said, "I just want to know you are still with me." "Alright." And then, Lincoln saw his singer smile and wave at him. Good, again, that smile. Lincoln walks to him and sits down. If someone had acted like that before today, Lincoln might have felt a little bit strange but……the people who did this act were Lincoln's singer, star, and boyfriend. So Lincoln thought everything about the man in front of him seemed…… normal and cute. Immediately after leaving the hospital, Remus checked into Lincoln's house, where he refused all contact with anyone connected to his past (except Lincoln) and just stayed in his room all day. Other than the above, everything is normal. Remus lived in Lincoln's house like a cheerful ghost, he'd scorch the pots when he was cooking, and he'd beg Lincoln to buy a game because it was on sale on his steam wishlist (even though Remus had the money to buy it). It's just that he doesn't make any music anymore, and it's like the days of being the lead singer of a band never happened. A lot of people will say "That is abnormal", but Lincoln is not. For Lincoln, that's just one …… piece in the person of Remus, as a seeing every turn of a kaleidoscope, which is endearing no matter what it looks like. Remus laughs very violently but rarely smiles now. Contrary to when he used to be in the band, Remus used to smile a lot at that time because it was unobtrusive. Remus dreaded every stare. In one of the few interviews he was in the band, he once said: “It's a good thing I'm nearsighted, otherwise I can't have any way of fooling myself that ‘nobody's looking at me’". Lincoln replays this interview again and again and then feels proud because Remus is not afraid of him. Even at that time the members of the band, including Remus himself, knew that Lincoln was Remus's fan (of the intimidating variety). "Did you ever think of calling the police when I used to see you every time? " When the first day of Remus moved into Lincoln's house, Lincoln joked. Remus turns around and looks at him like he heard some unbelievable thing. "No, never, "Remus told him, "Why do I have to? I mean……I know you put a huge attention on me but……" Remus throws the thing that he holding away. His hands gestured idly in the air, trying to find the exact answer in these mysterious gestures, but he finally gave up. "I don't know," Remus spoke frustrated, "Even though from the first time I met you the people around me have said that you are a bit strange ……I still feel you will never hurt me." "You trust me?" "I just believe my heart." Remus shrugged, “Even though a lot of the time it shouts so loud inside me because it's triggering some switch that shouldn't be triggered, it's fine to listen and see what it has to say once in a while, at least I can feel safe. ” When Remus finished, he and Lincoln stared at each other silently for a moment. "Any question?" After this moment, Remus tilted his head slightly to the left. "No." Lincoln laughed and helped Remus put his baggage.

Lincoln's thoughts returned to this room in the present. He changed the subject as if nothing had happened, "So what are we eating tonight?" "Sichuan fish soup with pickled mustard greens, Dandan noodles, and Chili oil wontons." Remus began to say the food's name without hesitation. "Can we just eat hotpot?" “No way.” Remus vetoed, “Hot pot and this type of dish are both from Sichuan or Chongqing but they are not essentially the same thing, and I have to correct you on this erroneous idea that ‘all spicy Chinese food is related to hot pot’.” “All right.”Lincoln stood up, "Want some drink?" "Jasmine milk tea 80% sweet no ice large and without boba." There were no pauses, and someone used his lung capacity well. "Maybe someday you'll try some new flavors of milk tea?" "Yeah, maybe when this world is destroyed." Remus roll his eyes. "Wanna come with me?" Lincoln pretended to extend the invitation as if nothing had happened. "No. I don't want to." Remus' handsome face scrunched up so fast. Remus has never been out of the house since moving into the Lincoln home, except to see the psychiatrist. The psychiatrist claims it's a "pathological isolation" and reminds Lincoln that he must help Remus out of this "rut," but Lincoln thinks it's okay that Remus doesn't want to leave the house. At least he'll never leave me, Lincoln thought, and I don't think Remus doesn't realize he's self-isolating himself. The man who can write lyrics that can make people crazy emotion can't be so stupid that he doesn't realize what he's doing; he just needs time, even if the length of that time is a lifetime. Lincoln stands up and leaves the room, Remus silently follows Lincoln out of the room before taking up position by the door to the room, he leans his full weight against the door frame and watches with his arms crossed over his chest as Lincoln begins to put on his shoes after picking up his car keys. "Miss me?" "No, my dear fan," Remus lied without changing his face, "I just wanna turn the drawing room's light off." Lincoln shrugged, he knew what Remus looked like when he tried to lie, but he was happy to pretend he was being lied to. He walks to the door, but Remus doesn't move. Until Lincoln opens the door and wants to close it, through the crack in the door, Lincoln sees Remus quietly walk toward the switch to turn the light off, and immediately afterward he hears Remus say aloud, "Take care on the road. " The door closed.

@pressplay-if I was going to post it anonymously but couldn't find it …… Anyway! (leaving Tumblr nervously, leaving my laptop nervously, leaving this internet nervously)

[eerna]

eerna what's going on in s3 bridgerton your posts and answers making me scared to watch on my life lmao

pls don't hate me, Colin lovers, but I was told by a friend who read the series that he's more fun and chill in the books and also i just....find Polin from even s1 is kinda uhhhhh?awkward?? cuz he's kind of unnecessarily serious and so not chill in the previous seasons?? maybe i don't see his appeal because I'm no Penny but i do not see his appeal in the show

so rn i haven't even watched it and seeing your posts is making me moreeeeeee 😶��🌫️ it's okay give us the cringey details

Nsbysbbsb NO WORRIES!!! I have a weirdly big amount to say about this show bc I am no longer suffering as much as I did in s1 and 2. Prepare for an essay on my feelings on Polin and thank you for enabling me.

Ok so Colin. Not saying your friend is wrong bc I didn't read the book, but p much everyone I saw talking about it said Colin was very angry and aggressive in it, and for NO REASON since he's supposed to be the "calm brother". I'm glad that the show let him get upset, but never the way he was in the books/Anthony was in s2, where I legit worried about Kate's safety sometimes. Colin was my fav Bridgerton brother bc he was totally different from all the other men on the show, calm and silly and romantic.

Thar being said!!! I never ever thought of him as a GOOD love interest, and s3 only made it worse. First off, yeah, s1 and 2 do NOT show him and Pen as friends nearly enough to warrant the speed of their connection in s3. I blocked s2 from my memory bc I hated it So Damn Much so I can't 100% stand behind my words, but I don't really remember many friendly scenes with the two of them that didn't feel like he was just entertaining his sister's bestie? I remember he once danced with her, and he sent her letters from his travels, and that's it. Then in s3 we are supposed to believe Pen knows him soooo well, she sees through his tricks when no one else does, he can't stand losing her friendship when she stops talking to him. How, when the impression I got from their relationship was "oh she is clearly silly in love and he doesn't care about her enough to notice"!!!

And s3... Oh boy. Colin gets his "glowup" and becomes a rake bc Bridgerton writers would probably spontaneously combust if they wrote a virgin male lead. We see him flirt and smash other women and it is always so so so awkward. I've seen people trying to rationalize it as "Oh he is supposed to be pretending, oh we are supposed to find it cringe" but NO, he is objectified the exact same way Simon and Anthony were, and we as the audience are supposes to think it is sexy. To be fair, Pen finds it concerning but I think that has more to do with the amount of silly, vapid women constantly swarming around him. So now we are even FURTHER away from seeing any reasons why the two of them would be friends. And then we get hit with the "Colin teaches Pen how to find a husband" plot, and oh my god it is so bad, IT IS SO BAD, they have like 2 lessons across 1 episode before they are busted and stop and he literally taught her NOTHING she IGNORED HIS ADVICE AND FIGURED IT OUT BY HERSELF but everyone treats him like a war hero for taking one for the team and teaching the poor unlikeable social reject how to act. We also have the stupid scene where she is criyng begging him to kiss her because she is convinced otherwise she would die without being kissed, and he is trying to elegantly avoid it, and oh my god, I hated this, it is framed as cute and romantic but it is so uncomfortable and bad. AAAAAAAA. Anyway. Then there is this hilariously horrible incident where he saves her from a feral balloon, and if you are wondering wtf am I talking about, its because it is really bad and written like a Scary Movie slasher scene. There are exactly 3 moments that I liked, and ALL of them were bc Colin seemed very lost and desperate. First was when Pen told him they should stay away from each other after the scandal of them hanging out came out (which I liked bc if it were any other girl, some unhinged character would force them to marry, but since it was Pen they were like "Well obviously it's true there was nothing untowards happening it is just cringe haha loserrr"), and he looked like he stopped comprehending English. The second was when he was confessing his feelings, he got on his knees and looked like he was about to cry and I thought that was sweet! Well, he did mention torture which is a very ugly word to use in such a speech, but whatever. The third was after the Infamous Carriage Scene when he says something silly and the two giggle together and I was like PLEASE WHERE WAS THIS ENERGY IN S1 AND 2!!

And may I just say!! The actual Bridgerton Glowup one was PEN and NOT COLIN. In s1 and 2 you could tell she was pretty, but in s3 they made her so damn beautiful that my friends and I would go "Oh wow" several times per episode. And it's not only the clothes, they would put her in rooms where she pops out and sparkles and frame her in shots just perfectly. Idk why they only gave her 1 alternate love interest and then shot her Like That, there should have been at LEAST one more guy following in Debling's trail. Now she's the hot one in the relationship so I can't buy her desperation for Colin's approval or society's perception of Colin as a charity in any way.

With all that said. I think this is the best season of Bridgerton proper. It still isn't something I'd enjoy unironically, but at least it is neither a horrible age gap dynamic feat. SA nor a horrible disgusting juggling of sisters feat. murderer vibes. The only thing I'd say is worse than it used to be is the clothes, which are slowly creeping towards The Reign level of ahistorical and bad.

[soo-won]

Akatsuki no Yona chapter 60 magazine vs volume

Hi everyone! I managed to get my hands on the clip out of the magazine version of chapter 60 from Hana to Yume issue 17/2012, and as we don't have much trace from the magazine versions of the chapters from then, i thought it would interesting to share my findings! First, the color page: the editor text says "What will become of Yona and the others? The suspens is agonizing, but?!" (baby trio time!!!!!!) Otherwise it advertizes volume 9 and how well it's been doing. It was the first ever volume to get a special edition and cover with a new drama CD and comments from the seiyuus! Something that I can't help but find a bit ironic is how they really highlight Takuhiro Sakurai as Tae-jun on the bottom right and ah yeah...this didn't age too well.

Behind the color page, it shows that Hana to Yume was (already back then) having a special Yona Crimson Festival campaign. This is when belated Kentaro Miura drew an illustration of the whole main cast that could be win in a lottery, with a reproduction of the special cover of volume 9, autographs of the seiyuus from the drama CD and Kusanagi, and a totebag with Ao that I had never seen before. Miura apparently said that he just ended up drawing the whole cast since it grew a lot (since the time he had only drawn Yona and Hak I assume).

Then to the chapter in itself. I know Kusanagi started really making changes between the magazines and tankoubon(volumes) in relatively recent years so I didn't expect to find any difference here honestly but I found a few! I also find it interesting to see her author's note, the summary of the plot and presentation of the characters etc all around.

So! Page 2 and the first page of the chapter. No change with the manga page from the volume we know of here, but I thought it would be interesting to share for what's below. I honestly am a bit too lazy to translate the whole synopsis as I don't think it says anything novel or specially interesting (I can still do it if someone insist), but I found the characters presentation sweet since it's different from the one we've been getting for every chapter for a while, and it's very cute too since it's specially for this flashback mini-arc.

Yona: Kouka Kingdom's Princess. She is an only child who lost her mother at a young age. She is preciously raised by her father and King Il.

Suwon: Yona's cousin of three years older. He has been gently watching over Yona like a little sister ever since he's little.

Hak: The successor of Mundok, General of the Wind Tribe. Later on, he'll become the servant and bodyguard of his childhood friend Yona.

Now on to page 4: Yona's hair and face were redrawn on the third panel! The movement lines next to her head were erased too. For the text and font, you can also see that the font of the first bubble was changed for the default one, and that they're formated it slightly differently in the last box. We don't often think about the original lettering in manga and how they can also change between raw and volume do we?

Page 7: It's not like this change matter much, but I was so surprised and happy to find out that this iconic page had been modified as well. The third panel that showcases how lively Kuuto is was completely replaced with people playing music. I think the volume version indeed conveys Kuuto's atmosphere much better (like why would Yona be so amazed at two men talking and drinking really), but it's interesting to find out that back then they struggled to find what to put there precisely. From a creative process pov this is so relatable lmao.

Other than these two pages before, I haven't noticed any other change, but I thought I would share Kusanagi's author comment!

"I'm so so happy. I can't believe Miura-sensei drew me an illustration of Yona(and of the whole main cast at that!). This boost me up even more to do my very best! Thank you so much (happiness)."

Nothing special on the last page, but if anyone wondered if there was some editor text here to tease the next chapter...well no there isn't nfjbfhjbg. I so wish I could get my hands on chapter 61 too...

I'm not sure if I'll be able to get my hands on much more of those but I also got chapter 24 with this one, and I noticed a couple of things I'd like to share as well so stay tuned for that :)

[cringefail-hermitry]

I've been wanting to make a post like this for a while now, and well, having just finished a crucial stage of my life, I think this is a good a time as any.

It's gonna be a long one

Like, *LONG* long

Like, I Am Going To Mention Every Single One Of My Mutuals By Name long (if you'd rather not be tagged in the future, do warn me)

First of all, the primary purpose of this post is as a letter of thanks for the wonderful months you Tumblr peeps have provided me this year. I am not hesitant to say joining the hellsite was the single best decision I have made in the last 12 months, heck, I think about 2/3rds of the friends I mantain regular contact with nowadays came from here. But this wouldn't be a long post if it was just a brief "thanks y'all for improving my life". I'm gonna get into detail. And I'm gonna be sappy about it. You can't stop me. You're not my mother. And not even my mother could stop me from posting this.

I would've said "I thought long and hard about who I'd start with", if there was any question about it. There isn't. @tearychildren, where do I even fucking begin. I can't really say anything too specific because if I begin I don't think I'll stop and half this post is gonna be about you, and this is already a very long post, so I'm just going to leave it at this, you already know well enough just how much you matter to me.

Going onwards, another of the early spots goes to who I believe was my first mutual, definitely one of the first people I followed, @chlorohexidine, a long-time mutual and recent good friend, our daily chats, however short, never cease to be highlights of my days, your art is really cute (love me some rounded shapes) and brainstorming ideas for your TTRPG campaigns is always fun (I really like your worldbuilding, too). It's only fair to mention your (and my, just needed to make this segue well) good friend @xsenpi, infodumping touhou to you both genuinely got me through that month, and Undertale 2: Revenge of The Robots with Rei and TC has been a blast so far.

@soundsofastar is another that warrants special mention for actually changing my brain chemistry and making me appreciate the local wildlife even more than usual (if we ever meet in person, WE ARE GOING ON A NICE LONG WALK TO LOOK AT BIRDS TOGETHER, WHEREVER IT IS WE ARE WHEN THAT HAPPENS, MARK MY WORDS). Your art also makes me feel things. Not many things make me feel stuff a lot. That is impressive. I should be in a good spot to finish reading the Illuminae Files within the next few days, so please do pester me about it, otherwise the piece of media that the next person I'll talk about recommended to me will consume all the time I'd read it in.

So, the next person I'll talk about, @northwest-cryptid, thanks for letting me use our DMs as my Mabinotepad, and for getting me into Mabinogi in the first place, you've been both the direct and the indirect cause of many good times, and I gotta be honest I kinda admire you a lil' bit (and if you know anything about how I talk, I am horrible at expressing vulnerability, admiration and these sorts of emotions without a bunch of euphemisms unless I'm doing this sort of tangent where I attempt to talk about myself in a more depersonalized way, so what that sentence there essentially means is "I admire you a lot and you are an inspiration").

Another pivotal figure in how this year shaped out is @ratlesshonret, creator of The Bird Nest, site of many good times, who has exposed me and many others to some wonderful media (I AM GOING TO FINISH POCKET MIRROR SOMETIME, MARK MY WORDS), reading through all the chats in the server is usually a blast, too. Your contributions to my life cannot be understated. Seriously, thanks.

The next great friend I'll mention is @transgender-lea-crosscode, we've started talking more only recently, but have already bonded a fair bit, I reckon, damn you're good at Blazblue. You've dared to make me good at the game and for that, I commend you. You should say words about Zeroranger in my general direction sometime, I'd be happy to hear/read them.

Now for those mutuals that I don't really speak to, but are responsible for like, 75% of my total notes, like, everyone is more than welcome to jump into my DMs and start talking about anything whenever, but y'all specifically are folk I'd have started talking with regularly ages ago if I knew what to talk about. @hoshinoreika2004, @ward-leon, @edenplumreal, @tabnk2, @tapok-eve , @boofbv and @sorcerousbrick, thanks for all the lil' dopamine hits.

Shoutouts to @wretchedbirdthing for being normal about that bird, you're a blast to see on my dash and I wish you luck snapping those collarbones in twain to hear those gay little squawks.

@freiflies and @ottisbuns, alongside Tapok, Vic and Honret, y'all bring life into The Bird Nest, and although I haven't really shown up much there recently, I still read most of everything, the words are cool, keep up the good work!

@genericgirl420 and @mikusays-transrights, you two are the mutuals that suffer the least with The Distances, so let's do this in a more, well, local fashion. É genuinamente bom ver que a comunidade brasileira do tumblr está ativa e saudável, aumenta minhas esperanças de encontrar outras criaturinhas desse site maligno pelas ruas, sua presença, por si só, já melhora meus ânimos, por isso, agradeço profundamente.

Ok back to speaking in simplified Old German. This next section goes out to @lemocoffe and @teacup-of-doom, both of whom I haven't really interacted much, but what little there was was quite great, this is, in fact, an invite to do more of the interact-y thing. Y'all are cool.

Another shoutout to a frequent view on my dash, @lobotomise-me-please, whose "Boobs Girl Music" post still has 10k notes to me, I'll get back to mass reblogging it someday (if y'all wanna help, check out @boobsgirlmusic for the post, that's my Boobs Girl Music sideblog where I reblog Boobs Girl Music)

@aurora-veil, @limbuscompanyyuri and @thevanishedpeople-intothenight are up next, some of my first mutuals, y'all post good. And have been doing so consistently. For the past like, 9 months or so. That's impressive.

@meltingadoration, @holyitsquiverrflynn and @jestressofnihil, my more recent moots, there hasn't been much time to do the friendship-building and knowing each other thing, but all that means is that there's still many opportunities for that, which is cool.

Last but not least, the mutuals who I haven't quite gotten to know as well, but I'm inviting to chat anytime, @readysetgargoyle, @atlasmothss, @meeresengel, @flesh-borne, @b-kut, @aureatecenotaph, @risingdragonblade, @agender-witchery (your posts helped me immensely in figuring out gender, thanks for that) and @lich-of-lcorp. Y'all are cool, we should talk more.

And one last section for all those who I've been in touch with but aren't mutuals with, for any and all reasons (I do tend to reblog very, well, erratically), y'all deserve to be on this list, but I just didn't wanna bother you too much (I do have words of thanks to say though, if you want them, just ask).

This post is still too short to express how thankful I am for y'all existing. I don't think text could ever do it justice.

[hannieluvsyou]

Super shy.

Kwon Soonyoung x Reader

description: Wherein the loud boy gets smitten with his seatmate, the shy girl.

genre: fluff

warnings: swearing.

note: I apologize in advance for any typos or grammatical errors.

'This guy keeps staring at me...' I thought as I shift uncomfortably in my seat, trying to ignore the intense stare that shoots holes through the side of my head.

Who you may ask? Kwon Soonyoung. My seatmate.

Ever since he became my seatmate, he's a bit too uh... Loud for my liking. I don't really pay him any mind but his stares and loud mouth make me sweat literal fucking bullets.

"Hey uh– do you have a spare pen?" I quickly looked at him, surprised at the sudden question. He just stares at me as he waits for my response.

'Shit shit shit what do I say?!' I internally panic as I look for a pen.

Soonyoung patiently waits with sweaty palms. He finally talked to you! Even if you looked scared shitless, he talked to you! All he has to do now is do it every chance he gets. The hard part is well, talking to you.

Talking to people is like taking a walk in the park for him. But when it comes to you, it's a completely different story. His usual loud ass mouth becomes a thin line and his usually relaxed eyes are almost bulging out of it's sockets.

After some time, he saw a pen slide on his side of the desk.

"Here, I hope you don't mind. I don't have any other pen available." I say as I play with the pages of my book.

Soonyoung stares at the unicorn themed pen in his hand.

'Cute.' He fanboyed in his mind, pink dusting his cheeks.

He clutched it and looked at you with sparkly eyes.

"I like it!" He started. "Thank you." He said while sporting a blinding smile.

"No problem..." I whisper lowly. I don't think he heard me but his smile that widened says otherwise.

He knows that you're a shy one, but that does not stop him from feeling these particular emotions. He strongly believes that 'opposites attract'.

A few days have passed since that interaction. I have embarrassed myself once, I'm not letting myself get embarrassed twice. I just have to avoid him for as long as I can. It's not that I don't like the guy, I just don't think that we'll ever get along.

Soonyoung on the other hand, will do anything just to talk to you. Accidentally bumping into you, asking for notes, inviting you for lunch, he has tried everything. Yet what does he get? A scared expression and quick nods. It's not like he's not hurt about it, but he understands that you may be a bit overwhelmed with his advances.

But today may be the day that things will change.

I have a quiz today, and that means that I only got 2 hours of sleep. I might've aced the exam but I am tired as hell.

I can't help the bobbing of my head. 'It feels like I have a fucking brick as a head.' I thought while my eyes are only halfway open.

Soonyoung of course notices, and is about to ask if you're okay. But before he can, your head is immediately met by the hard table resulting in a loud 'bam!' sound. You remained still, already fast asleep. Luckily for you, there was only four other people in the room that don't seem to really care.

'Her position looks really uncomfortable..' he thought. An idea came up, but he ponders for a bit since you might not approve.

Finally he caves in and gently brushes the stray hairs out of your face, admiring your face in the process.

"So cute.." he said quietly as to not wake you up.

He shifts your position and now you're head is laying on his shoulder while his arm is securely wrapped around you. You unconsciously snuggle closer to him.

You stir a bit and notice your change in position. You look up and see Soonyoungs face, but before you can say anything he silently assures you that it's okay.

You ponder for a bit but doze off again, wrapping your arms around his waist slowly.

'I guess he's not that bad..' I thought before fully letting darkness engulf my vision.

He prays that you won't kill him when you fully wake up but for now, he'll enjoy this moment with you.

[mdhwrites]

So if Dana said she didn't have any original season 3 ideas, why did she also say on Twitter that she wanted 10-20 half hours for season 3?

Now apparently from the transcript and the like, what was said that there were like one sentence pitches for episodes but nothing concrete or the like. That I believe. After all, it's like taking sticky notes and using them to jot down passing thoughts. But... Ideas don't mean anything. You need to have an actual coherent thought as to how you are going to use those ideas as a creator.

So when she says she wanted those episodes, I believe her. But... Instead of it being so she could have coherently finished her story, something you can feel isn't exactly happening during S3, it would have been to explore her ideas and let it be her mouthpiece. Even as far back as S1, you can clearly see this conflict in the show. The First Day lets her take potshots at modern education and saying kids should have more freedom... At the expense of everyone forgetting that multi-tracking is literally illegal. But the idea was more important than the overall story so in it went.

Besides, when asked about your work that you cherish so much, are you going to tell people you wanted LESS time to do whatever you wanted? Or are you going to say you wanted as much time as possible? Especially since without a solid plan, you can't be like Matt Braley who straight up went "Nope. Amphibia wasn't shortened. It was always planned to be three seasons."

I still stand by the idea that Dana actually wanted to just keep going WELL past S3. Even now, she wants to do a spin off and one of her greatest regrets for what was missed was not being allowed to do more teenage Raeda stuff in the show. A second episode in the past. Expanding on what? Who knows but it's more time spent with the ship that Dana clearly loved.

I am not saying Dana was lying or a bad person but the question that is worth asking is if that time would have been spent actually wrapping up plot threads or exploring characters as they are now. Otherwise, it would end up being like the S2B and S3 we got where we are still getting elements added, refusing to wrap up story elements, and having to drag back plot points from almost entire seasons ago (Willow and Amity's friendship), if not MULTIPLE seasons ago (Willow's lack of power control) just to do something with these characters despite it being way too late to treat those elements as relevant. There is a reason why if I hear that Dana is the lead for another cartoon, I'll probably be staying away. Not when I don't want promising statements to never have a plan behind. Not again.

Expected this to be shorter. I'm rambly though. Also just wanted to clear this out. Admittedly, it's stuff like this that makes it so that if anyone ever told me they didn't trust me as a writer, I'd understand. Not because of me wasting time but because my mental health gets in the way and can cause ideas to die as my brain just refuses to write them. How we as writers use our time with the audience is important. It leaves an impression and for me, Dana's impression is incredibly negative because I care about story, even if characters come first to me.

Sigh.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[iizuumi]

Why do you ship Gen and Reno? Genuine question, I don't mean to sound rude at all. Sorry if it comes off that way.

I recently caught up with the manga (haven't read B-side yet) and there weren't any interactions between them.. is it just that they look cute together?

Thank you if you answer, I love your art- am just wondering 🍪💕

It really did just start off with me thinking they're the most pretty characters so they should kiss LMAO

but since then I have spent a lot of time thinking about them so let me present to you some of my findings on why they would work so well together!!

that i will put under the cut because i'm shy

a lot of this will make me sound like i am this meme but hear me out okay i've thought about this B-Side spoiler for the first one! but i have to mention it bc it's like my favourite part of them and also probably the one that makes most sense lmao skdjfhs It touches on a part of narumi's backstory so skip it if you don't want the spoiler!

shared backstory/ trauma!! I think with both of them knowing what it's like to lose their family and grow up without anyone around who really cared for them they'd be able to understand each other better than anyone else understood them before. I feel like they both possibly never had a place in the world where they really belonged since losing their family (with narumi always being pushed from one person to the next and reno's grandmother seemingly unable to really give him a good home) so in my mind they finally find a place in the world by each other's side because they get each other! They've been through the same shit! They'll finally help each other heal after all these years of not dealing with it!! Also it's really interesting how they have the same/similar pasts but both deal with it so differently. Narumi being all childish because he never got to have a proper childhood and Leno being so mature & caring like he wishes someone cared for him ;;

We know that Narumi is all about strength, all about results so who better to catch his eye than Reno who is getting better and showing results so quickly!! starting at 8% release force and then getting up to 43% with a numbers weapon after not even that much time??? Pls there's no way Narumi doesn't see the potential!! Also just the fact that nobody has ever been able to use 6 before like I'm sure that's already enough to turn everyone's heads but tell me narumi wouldn't be curious about this little prodigy who got their strongest weapon!

I just think squishing humanity's strongest together with the strongest numbers weapon user is a very sexy combination like just the sound of that sounds correct to me yes

They can bring out a side in each other that they otherwise don't get to show much? I feel like Reno is always taking on the responsible adult role lmao he's always worrying about everyone and taking care of things and narumi is such a silly little childish goober if he can't help reno unwind and allow himself to be a bit of a kid again then who can!! Reno is just a little guy, sit him down and make him play video games like everyone else his age!!

Looking at how Reno deals with Kafka's Kaiju transformation shenanigans I believe Reno would be very good at putting up with Narumi's shenanigans as well lmao but also he is such a polite little guy!! I think the combination of Reno being very much polite towards Narumi but also not taking shit from him is just very much amusing to me.

Reno's whole character arc is built around him trying to get stronger and strong enough to stand by Kafka's side but like if he keeps getting stronger and stronger where will he end up?? As the strongest. Which currently is Narumi ofc. So i do like the idea of Reno maybe idolizing Narumi a little bit ,, seeing how strong he is and being like yeah that's where I need to be. and ofc it's all about being strong enough to protect his loved ones but who says narumi can't be included in that by the time he gets there!!

@acystreia told me about this one but apparently electrical currents move a lot better through air than through ice? and isn't Narumi's whole ability with 1 built on him seeing electrical impulses from the brain to tell what someone is going to do next?? And Reno's whole ability with 6 is centered around the ice thing? which means Reno is the worst possible matchup against narumi in a fight???? I think this alone is reason enough for them to make out immediately. I don't actually remember any physics so this might just be me talking out of my ass but if i'm wrong i don't want to know let me live in my delusions i'm happy here

that's all I can think about right now .... I'm sorry for the long post LMAO but i hope you see my vision at least a little bit 🙏 and if not that's okay too c: still thank you for being interested in them!! ♥

[misc-obeyme]

hihi I'm back again, and here to ask who in the cast you think has the skill to do hair/up do's?

I'm 5'9, but my hair is now down to my mid thigh, and like around three feet long ?? I haven't chopped it since 2018, only trimmed it. Yet I only know how to do a simple braid, my hair basically lives in a low ponytail lol (though my mom will still do my hair if I ask her for help, which I'm grateful for)

anyway I got to read vol 2 of the manga and I remembered that the artist drew their interpretation of Lilith. So, it made me wonder if Beel or Belphie would know how to do hair, since they were the closest to her, and if she ever asked them for help?

I think Levi would be able to follow any tutorial, or figure out how to do something by trial and error since he cosplays (I bet he made his ruri-chan wig himself). I'd love to show him a picture of the heroine from whatever anime I'm watching and ask if he could help me recreate their style

Asmo we've seen in the dame cards, he's done some cute hairstyles!! I bet I could go to him if I had a fancy event.

I still think about Mammon's dame card... The chokehold it has on me is wild. We saw him do his own make-up in the art, and I think it was said he made his own outfit. So he's a maybe I could go to him? Or he'd put a lot of effort into learning because he knows it'd make me happy lolol

Barbatos also looks really pretty in the dame card !! I haven't read that devilgram, so idk if he did it himself, but what can't he do? I know in TTWF devilgram he literally makes MC's outfit and it made me SWOON

my last thought is if you can just do stuff with magic instead. Does it drain your energy to keep the style, or is it a one and done kinda spell, and don't gotta worry about it? Could a really powerful sorcerer change their hair color, and never have to worry about it fading? That'd be really cool, since I need to re dye the streaks in my hair. That would save lots of money LOL

okay I'm done 😅 time to wait ten billion years for my hair to dry now and try drawing (aiming for every other day to create something new to get better!!)

- ✨ anon

HOW do you handle having hair that long?!?

I'm 5'7" and I used to have my hair down to my low back. It was during the pandemic when I couldn't exactly go get it cut, so I just let it grow lol. And it grows dang fast, but I don't think I've ever had it past the low back area??? Do you accidentally sit on it sometimes? Or is it usually okay because you have it tied back?

All I know is I was so relieved to chop it all off lol! It's super short now, which is how I like it. It takes me ten minutes to wash and style it. I just don't have the patience to maintain it when it's long. And it's naturally curly, so having it short also means I can just let it curl and not worry about it. Ah but I am pretty envious because I always wanted to be able to have one of those really long, thick braids...

Anyway, getting off topic here, back to the question! I do think magic can be used to alter hair! I think sometimes you can get stuff that's temporary (I do believe there was a daily chat about this where Asmo put some kind of potion or something on Lucifer and Mammon?), but I would be surprised if there wasn't some kind of magic spell to permanently keep your hair whatever color you want. I think it's probably just a one and done situation so you wouldn't have to maintain it. Or at least, they'd want to develop something like that because otherwise it wouldn't be worth it right?

As for the characters, I agree with your assessments! I do think in a general sense, they'd all try their best to do your hair if you needed them to.

But as for who would already be capable without having to learn first, I think Asmo is a top contender. Barb can absolutely do anything and I don't doubt that styling hair is something a good butler should know.

I think Levi is another good option for the same reasons you said! I think he probably does have some skill at wig styling! And due to his ability to do costuming in general, I kinda think he'd be able to do a good job on real hair as well if he wanted to.

I love the idea of Beel and Belphie being good at it because of Lilith. Like I'm imagining they only know some really basic styles that were her favorites, but they're happy to do them for you any time. Maybe they get a little misty eyed while doing it because it reminds them of her so much. Awww...

I actually think Lucifer would do a good job, too, but expect to be sitting around for hours because he's gonna make sure no hair is out of place. Only perfection will suffice.

I think Mammon probably mastered whatever style he needed for his dame outfit, but I do think he would learn for you if you wanted him to.

Satan probably already learned from a book or maybe just from watching Asmo doing his hair. But I could see him wanting to do really elaborate styles or maybe using magic to style your hair.

I think Solomon would also be someone you could try, but he would absolutely use magic. I think if you really wanted him to, he would know how to do simple styles by hand. I could see him being really happy to carefully braid your hair by hand. But he wouldn't be able to resist a little bit of magic, maybe to give it an extra sparkle or a streak of color~ I think he'd develop all kinds of hair styling magic if you wanted him to lol.

Diavolo strikes me as willing but perhaps not the best at this particular thing... he doesn't exactly have experience with his own hair.

And I'm not sure about Simeon. I feel like he's pretty competent (except for technology obviously), so he would probably be able to learn how to do it fairly easily. But I don't know if he'd already have some knowledge. Same with Raphael. Though I love the idea of both of them like... doing the hair of little angels~

Mephisto would know about a bunch of fancy Devildom styles, but would he be able to do them? I think you might end up with your hair braided like a horse's mane instead.

Thirteen would know how to do everything. She's got her own long hair and there's no way that she hasn't experimented with it over the years! I love the idea of her doing your hair and her own hair in the same style so you match.

Anyway, I hope you have been able to get some drawing done! Every other day is an excellent goal! I'm rooting for you!!

[onboardsorasora]

Danni!!! Okay of course first I am here to give you these 💐💐💐 because you deserve them for every single fic you write and especially for Reclamation!!! 🫶🏼 I was wondering if you could give a little peek into what happens after the ending! Not a full blown 10k work or anything but just some thoughts like…what is the wedding like? Where do they live after? Do they eventually have kids? Do sewis have kids? Anything else you wanna add! 🫶🏼

Oh Isabel thank you for thisssss!!!!🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾 I had so much fun thinking of these! I could go on forever lmao. Here are some post Reclamation headcanons, I'll put them after the cut😅😅 I still can't believe its over🥹🥹🥹🥹

They get married at the Verstappen estate. Daniel wanted to elope so they didn't have to plan anything but Sophie insisted and called up Grace and they pulled rank. They have a garden party in the sprawling grounds. It's very classy. Isabella, Isaac, Luka and Lio are stinkin’ cute. 

Max and Daniel go off to fuck twice. The first time was handys after their first look (Charles reminded them that they’d have blowjob lips in all their pictures otherwise. Max thought that was a good idea, Jules vetoed). The second time they go to fuck is during the reception after the first dance because Daniel whispered in Max’s ear that he was wearing a special (and pretty) plug.

Daniel changes outfits three times because of course he would. His final late night reception party shirt was actually a tasteful pattern this time but if you looked closely (and only 3 people did) you’d see that the outline design was actually cocks with a ring on them 😊.

Carlos is there as a friend and Charles' date. They finally got together. Pierre is there with a new girlfriend. A different girl from the yacht party who was also a different girl from the engagement party. She's only in one group picture because no one trusts that she'll last longer than a few more weeks.

They live in the penthouse for a bit then they buy a house in the hills with a view of the city and the ocean. Daniel categorically will not move back into the estate and Max has no problems there. They get one more cat– a compromise because Max wanted a dog (since they now have a yard) and Daniel said no and sucked his dick so he'd stop bringing it up. This happens twice before Max actually does stop bringing it up because he doesn’t want to get pavloved into getting hard when thinking about dogs 🫣

They do have a daughter eventually, but like after a good while of just being married and having each other again. They have a lot of time to make up for!

Sewis absolutely has kids. They have three little gremlins! Twin girls and a sweet little boy. The middle daughter is soooo bossy like both her dads. She bosses Blake around and has him wrapped around her finger. She was the only one who didn’t cry when he first met her– she actually went to sleep, and that was during the colic phase so Sewis begged him to come over often since he seemed to be the only one to get her to rest. 

When Jules gets married, Daniel goes all out with the planning. Jules is exasperated as fuck but he lets Daniel have this because he knows his bestie is trying to ‘repay him’. Which they’ve spoken argued about but Daniel needs Jules to know how much he loves and appreciates him forever and ever til the end of time. They ended each wedding planning email with ‘fuck off’ and Jules’ said ‘fuck of please/respectfully/categorically/emphatically’. Daniel cackles each time.

Max and Daniel do not go off to fuck at Jules’ wedding. Not because of respect or anything so silly. But Daniel essentially made himself the wedding planner's assistant so he literally couldn’t step away. Charles laughed at Max’s grumblings. The wedding was gorgeous.

They still go to the cabin as often as possible. Daniel bought more land around it and they built another, bigger cabin so that the entire group plus spouses and all the kiddies can be comfortable. None of Pierre’s girlfriends have been to the cabin.

[aces-and-angels]

Will your Rowan and cute Abel have babies too? Create a family? Adopt? 🥺🥺

ooo solid question- it's actually something i've thought about, esp. after writing my thoughts on ilw's finale (here's abel's for context)

i'll add my thoughts below the cut bc i'm known to ramble lmaoo

---

the short answer: no- here's the long one lol:

to sum things up from my original deep dive, i chose the mixed ending for abel x rowan. and in order to tell yall what i think will transpire between them- i gotta quote ro herself:

Rowan: “I... I can’t leave with you, Abel, not yet. Maybe not ever... I need to make sure people like Matthias don’t hurt it again... This is who I am, Abel, I think it always will be.”

i wanna focus on the language being used here, not because i believe ro is unsure of her motivations, but to highlight that she has only begun establishing who she really is + how this newly found sense of self will play out in her day-to-day life.

on the flip side, there's abel. someone who has simply lived more life and isn't going through the same type of growing pains we leave ro with by story's end. he's a career academic, a family man- someone who wants to set down roots and excel in his field of study.

logistically, it would take years before they'd be ready to take the plunge and become parents. for rowan, it's just not in the cards. (🎶 it's my hc, i can do what a i want to~ 🎶) and she doesn't want to.

her definition of family isn't bound by children, adopted or otherwise. before that picnic, rowan (again, my interpretation of her) has never expressed any interest in having kids. a bit of a nihilist in that regard, actually. the world is too fucked up as it is, why add to its collective misery?

post-picnic, there's a lingering fear that settles along with her feelings on children. the fear of losing what she has at any point. as a result, nothing truly feels like it's hers. a large reason why rowan falls for abel can be seen here:

Rowan: I have to go back... Abel: Of course. You know you can always stay here if you want. Rowan: Your siblings wouldn't mind? Abel: No. There's always room for one more person, no matter how small the house is. *You can't help but smile at him, your chest tight. This sort of close-knit family isn't something you're used to anymore. You've stayed with Amalia's family, but you haven't had one of your own, not since that day in the mountains.*

(and it's not even technically a 'romance' option 😉)

family isn't just having/adopting children. it's playing board games on amalia's bedroom floor. it's struggling to keep pace with jocelyn (and moss) on early morning runs. it's late night drinks at lincoln's favorite bar in vegas. and it's a shared life with abel- who got rowan to believe there is space in her heart for him and everything else life has to offer. and that's enough.

plus- it's so much more fun to be the cool, badass auntie 💅🏻

[obsessedwiththedragonprince]

Se4 ep5 thoughts

I am backk. Didn't really have time these last days but here i am.

As much as I'm interested in the main plot and Aaravos' era incoming, i first need to know what happened in the camp after architect put out the fire.

Honestly such a beautiful funeral? Simple and tranquil.

Rayla u can't come back after two years and act like nothing happened! I mean i know she says how much things changed but she really hurt him.

Our boy is cryingg. Random but we haven't really got an answer on whether she was unbanished? Also I need to see some Ethari. Like now.

I really like that even tho Soren is a comic relief most of the time, they didn't make him dumb.

I kinda don't get why Viren got so desperate to practically beg that creature? Only excuse i can find is his fascination and obsession with magic. Otherwise they just did it for comic relief I'm sure is coming. I just feel it. Building it up and then an anticlimactic 'surprise'.

Yep. There it is. Viren just being tired of their shit is so funny to me. He didn't ask to be brought back. Can't he just go back to being dead in peace?

I really liked Soren-Zubeia bonding moment. So cute?? And she appreciates his wit!

Ahhhh what happened with the elf??? From the camp? The arhitect is hurt okay but. Aaaa. Imagine just. Being him. And believing that your mother's spirit/soul is lost forever. I want answers! Also Amaya-Gren moments are always so wholesome i love them.

Dunno why but it's surprising to see Zubeia as an active figure. I feel like those in power are often shown as these really passive figures. Idk.

Lmaoo I'm loving these guardians/doormen or whatever they are. 'We accept your argument.'

Their guide is really givin me gollum vibes from Hobbit. Viren's exasperation continues.

'Infuriate him and...' 'You'll probably die.'

Love how Soren connects with everyone he spends two minutes with. I have a hunch which may be completely wrong but that this hole is the entrance?

We're back to the camp! Yayyy! Where. Is. The. Elf. That's literally all I'm asking for.

Soren being observant about people's emotions? Yes. Giving advice? I feel sth anticlimatic coming again. His lecturing reminded me of Zuko's silver sandwich.

Aren't they trying to lay low? A campfire? Really?

O.M.G. yes. It's not always just love trouble (even tho it's that also). Another PTSD moment. Honestly when he said 'You know, when he took over my whole body and used me like a puppet,' sounded like he was talking to every screenwriter ever. One of those posts on here or insta or just anywhere ranting about how there are consequences and ptsd after stuff like this.

Wish it lasted longer tho.

I kinda hope this lil dragon adopts Soren. He deserves his own animal companion.(did u notice everyone has one? Like Rayla has that monkey-y thingy which i shamefully forgot the name of, Ezran has Zym and regretfully passed Bait to Callum which not okay you can have two animals and share love equally?)

Oh Soren is captureddd. Myb thrown into the hole/may-be-entrance-hunch-thingy?

Do these drangons have like rattlesnake tail horns/antlers?

[woahjo]

tbh i'm also really curious about what all your answers might be to all those questions in the ask game if that's okay with you 😆 you have a very interesting and nice perspective (as i also see in your writing) that i am curious and want to know about your thoughts through those asks if that's fine :) (you don't have to if you think it's too much!)

this is SO SWEET!! i don't mind answering them at all!!! i'll try and do most of them, but im gonna pick my fav questions from the list <33 and ill put them below the cut. im so flattered actually that u wanna hear my answers to them what if i blushed...

What did you dream about last night?

OH FUCK i forgot i had this dream until i got halfway through the questions but last night i had a dream that i was at work but i was falling asleep during it. like could not keep my eyes open,.. and my manager messaged me on teams and she was like "we can see you doing nothing" but for some reason i just could not wake myself up. and then when i DID wake myself up in the dream i was like "bro something is wrong why does it feel like im still asleep. wake up!" and then i woke up and realized i was just dreaming. it scared me 😭

What is your favorite color?

i like yellow and orange!!!! but lately i have been on a bit of a light blue kick since this summer!!

Do you feel more connected to the moon or the sun?

this one is cute!! i think i feel more connected to the sun. i'm more comfortable during the day and tend to be in a better mood. plus i really like the way it feels on my skin <3

Have you ever wished on a shooting star?

a few times!!! i've seen some on the rare occasion i went camping, but i never really remember my wish long enough to know if it came true or not lol

What do you enjoy daydreaming about most?

god this is going to sound so corny but lately my fav daydream has been imagining that im winning my first emmy for an animated tv show. idk i just imagine the way it would feel to have my work and dreams recognized, getting to thank my parents and team and shit. corny corny i know but i love imagining it.

Do you believe in guardian angels?

i do, but in a nonreligious way! i won't go too deep into it, but i've had many dreams / experiences that preceded major life events that i can't explain otherwise. even without it, it's nice to think that there is something out there looking out for us. kinda like the universe has us in mind.

What is something (or someone) you’re in love with?

this one is hard!! i haven't been in romantic love with a person ever i don't think (mutually at least), but i am in love with my friends. i really truly believe i met them for a reason and i think i'm the luckiest person because they're in my life. i have so much love for them that i genuinely don't know what to do with it. my other love... and i say it so frequently... is writing and storytelling. it's the greatest love of my life, i know it.

What’s your ideal summer aesthetic?

linen clothes and dresses and flowy shorts and humidity and laying on the floor outside. unheated swimming pools, music from a speaker or the tv, friends laying out on towels. exploring cities and sweating and driving to the beach on a whim and sitting on the porch eating lunch. roadtrips along the coast with the windows down. yeah <3

Talk about something exciting or good that happened to you this year.

maybe not this year, but this summer, i spent a month traveling japan with one of my best friends.

Where do you feel most at home?

with my friends!!! always always always with my friends

What is something you own that is important to you? What makes it so important?

writing and creating things and making art!! i genuinely can't stop myself from doing it. i write and make things with the same urgency and feeling as eating or drinking water. i do it before i sleep and when i wake up and even just in my head constantly. it's corny, but it's a part of me and i genuinely can't live without it.

Do you believe dreams have meanings or are they completely random?

i've had some WILD dreams that absolutely have meaning. some of my dreams are totally random, but i think a lot of them are symbolic of things or feelings i'm experiencing. i had one that was so long and frightening and weirdly poetic that there's no way it couldn't have meant something. haven't quite figured it out yet tho LOL

Do you believe in love at first sight?

nope! i've definitely written about love at first sight, but i think that to really LOVE someone, you have to know them. that's one of the best parts about love.

What’s the sweetest thing someone has done for you?

i've spoken about it before but when my dad had a brain bleed in may and was rushed for emergency surgery, my friends (and housemates at the time) emailed all of my professors for me, packed a lunch, packed my car with blankets and tissues, sat with me while i packed a bag with clothes, and drove me six hours one way so that i could be at home with my family. he ended up going into surgery while i was on the drive back home and the housemate driving me held my hand for hours while i waited for news that he was out. i'd never felt more held and loved than i did then and they are some of the kindest things anyone has ever done for me to this day.

What’s your zodiac sign? Do you think you fit the general characteristics of that sign?

i'm a taurus (with a leo moon and leo rising)!! and i absolutely think i fit the characteristics LOL

Are you more of a hopeless romantic or realist?

mmmm i'm not sure! i'd say hopeless romantic if i had to pick one, but not to the point that i don't know how the real world works. i don't like big gestures though, so im not sure if maybe that disqualifies me LOL. i just like the idea of eventually being known and loved for it.

What’s a song that gives off good vibes anytime you listen to it?

hold in, hold on by kid bloom!!!

Have you ever written a love letter?

nope!!!

Name a book you don’t mind reading over and over.

heaven by mieko kawakami. i could read it 800 times and never be sick of it. the lilith's brood trilogy is a close second, though i've only read it once so we'll have to test it. but i LOVE that series.

What do you do to feel at peace?

i write or draw!!! that's typically my first instinct when i need some quiet or some callie time. i feel very calm when i create.

[7ban-sama]

(I didn’t mean to insult your girlfriend I’m sorry 🙏) but I’ve thought about smthg… it’s so funny how parents in JSHK never care about their children

*chuffing* as long as you're sorry...

(for future reference: I don't really know how to engage in an ask saying 'I like [thing] more than [your favorite thing]'... I'd prefer it if instead we could talk about a subject on it's own, not in comparison to My Thing. I like Sumire plenty, she is quite pretty. But Nene is my favorite, like how all aspects of my ship are my favorite thing in this manga, & I don't really get anything from hearing about preferences that I don't have, stated at me — there's not really a 'discussion' to be had... bc there's not even a question being posed..? Anyways, hope that illuminates something.)

Oh you know, it's funny, I moreso get the impression that Iro-sensei isn't really interested in parents as characters... so we don't really get many instances of them being incredible caretakers. We definitely have a skew of, various cases of neglect, or (as I suspect for Teru's upbringing) physical abuse — but I wouldn't say that all of the parents are deadbeats lol.

I assume that Nene's home life is perfectly fine, as it doesn't seem to trouble her at all. Her parents are by her side on her first day of middle school (unlike the Yugi or Minamoto, more fraught cases) and Nene seems to be able to pursue her own hobbies, fill her room with things she likes, etc. It's not that owning lots of things means that parents are good, but combined with Nene showing no notable distress about home life, I think it's indicative of them being willing to accommodate her personal tastes. Mommy and daddy will buy you ghoul toys, give you shopping money to buy cute clothes, let you stay out after school and go to Tanabata, so on and so forth. I think of Nene's parents as loving in a... neutral? Way? I don't think they are going above and beyond for her, necessarily, but she seems to have had a normal childhood and expects nothing from them. I'm not sure if there's even any expectations on her wrt future careers. Which imo, would be to purposefully contrast the Yugi, who likely had a strenuous home life alongside expectations for Amane's impending science-focused future.

Ahh, I believe her, you know. It's her distinct swag. Normal girl swag. She has been a normal girl living a normal life until she meets Amane...

Nene's problems lie in her peer-to-peer relationships. She's not able to make many friends, and is seen as weird and eccentric. A bit homely, not alluring, which means her chances at romance are slim... Which troubles her, because she's romance obsessed and really really wants to be in a relationship. I always ah, think it says a lot, that Nene's fear manifested in the Hell of Mirrors is everyone laughing at her about how she is unattractive and no one will ever want her. That's... simply her greatest concern in life... Being attractive enough... Yk I really feel for her though, I know a lot of people would see it as shallow, but I respect that this is just how she is. She can't, ignore it-!! But yk, I also love the fact that Nene doesn't seem to think very hard about her family... It's interesting, because she's otherwise a considerate girl, who cares when innocent people are in harm's way. But ah... she still doesn't factor in her parents' misery at the thought of her never returning from the Far Shore? This decision is so interesting. While fraught families can leave characters with lasting complications, which we can explore deeply... I also am very interested in when an individual has 'no reason' to resent their family — and they don't! — but they also do not seem to care deeply about them. When push comes to shove, Nene is willing to sacrifice everything she has for Amane... which is, in reality, what really sets her apart. Her romanticism goes beyond what a 'normal person' would do.

It is, in reality, easier to leave people who have been cruel to you, than people who have never really done you wrong, because they don't 'deserve' that. Nene is an only child, what if she is valued and loved by her parents...? What if she's their pride and joy, what if she makes them very proud? Well, it just deosn't matter, anyways. Which is selfish, in a way... but I like that. It doesn't matter if you should care about your parents hard work. What if you just, don't-? In Bakeneko Ryokan, Nene is a fancy, extravagant breed of cat, and her owner clearly loved her, enough to name her 'Pretty-chan', enough to put out a flyer to find her after she went missing. But, ehm, Nene simply left... in search of hot guys, to fawn over her...... I think this probably sums up what's going on in canon lol. Loved child, but ultimately this can't take up space in her heart.

Moving on from Nene... Mitsuba's mom seems like a well-meaning woman, as well. I actually would bank on her being more thoughtful than Nene's parents, bc she at least was invested actively in Mitsuba's hobbies, and she was concerned about his friendlessness... They seem to have 'hung out' more. (Makes sense... if Mits had no friends ww...) And, perhaps Kou's mom was a caring sort (? more ambiguous though, he loved her but was very young, and the Minamoto family is complicated.) And then there's a point where, idk if we have enough information to really make a call about anyone, like. What are Akane's parents like...? Honestly, I'd assume neutral again, not terrible but not amazing, not note-worthy. I think a lot of things go into this category...

I just don't get the impression Iro-sensei really wants to linger on anything they don't have to, it really needs to be plot-relevant. Whiiich.... imo makes sense... bc Iro also seems to gravitate to young characters — sooner going to write out complex interactions happening between, 8yos, rather than full fledged adults. Since I also like young characters and dgaf about parents, I kinda get it lol. Parents are often like, something you need to figure out in a clinical sense. Often times I handwave things like, ehh they're just normal people who are fine with their kid but more hands off or whatever, etc etc, let's move on.

Maybe it's also bound to happen when you mostly care about writing romance... *strokes my chin* Which, again, same, relate. You don't really want to linger on platonic dynamics tooooo longgg.... Boring.

So yeah. I think of it more of a matter of preference and how much time is allotted to things in the story, not necessarily that all parents are supposed to suck. I think it is supposed to be distinct when someone has OK parents.

[algid-star]

Oh. My. GOD. okay so,

My burnt-out dumb ass, been working on sewing, and shared this hobby with a friend (who is cute). And like, yay! Friend! I love friends! Community! Love and support and appreciation! You can get all these and more from people with whom you are not romantic!

And she messages me fairly out of the blue, and we get to texting, and talking about hanging out and having craft time and hangouts. Body doubling! Do your own individual projects, but in a group as a fun friendship activity!

And so we go grab boba tea before craft time. And let me tell, you. Respectfully. I know people can dress for themselves and not for others to be leering at them. But also she was wearing the kind of dress I would wear if I were her if I wanted to send a signal loud and clear. Respectfully: the titties were out, and they looked amazing. ANYWAYS, BY THIS POINT I'M ALREADY PANICKING.

"Am I being too autistic about this?". I was genuinely looking forward to crafting together because I really wanted to finish up my muslin and check the fit because this is the first fitted garment I'm drafting myself and like, I'm just kinda excited to have that experience, but also share it with a friend who's also into this hobby?

But then idfk where my mind went. We got back to my place and talked about crafts and I showed her around, but then before it was craft time she had to show me something on the sofa, and then we just talked for hours. And slowly got more and more subtly cuddly. Intertwined legs to watch something on a cell phone, when we easily could have chromecasted the video to the big TV in front of us.

As I'm saying this right now, in retrospect, I don't know how I was not clear in my reception of these signals. But also that's important for the story later. Because. BECAUSE, eventually our faces got a little close and she got flustered and at THIS point I felt confidently clear. And I just smiled and asked, "what?".

"Oh, I just. We just got really close there."

"yeah, we did." just a big teasing smile, with rizz.

After more flustered, I say, "listen, I play by vampire rules. I need an explicit invitation. If there's something you want, you need to tell me clearly. Otherwise I will not push."

"well, okay WAIT, well what are YOU feeling, what do you want?"

"I really like all this cuddling. And I also think maybe kissing could be really fun, too."

She agreed. AND AAAAAHHHH.

I am still buzzing. Can you believe that there are people who actually believe that consent can't be sexy? I bratted/teased/dommed my way into sexy kissy bitey time with a lovely and cute and wonderful woman by simply DEMANDING explicit consent.

And the only thing that ever held me back in this kind of interaction has been all the bullshit expectations of how I should behave as a "man", and now that I accept myself as non-binary, I just have to be ME, and that's enough. I don't need to put on a masking performance in order to start a physical or romantic relationship. If something happens, dope. If not, now I'm friends with yet another amazing and talented and beautiful woman. Woe is me, all of my friends are dope as fuck. How will I ever cope. (that's sarcasm).

Anyways, this was a big firehouse of feelings. Idk if any of it makes any sense. It's nearly 2am (she stayed until we noticed it was midnight and we have work in the morning) and I'm exhausted, so maybe I can't keep a train of thought.

But the fact that my dumbass autistic self was SO GENUINELY STOKED for craft time with friends, and then, only then when I have zero expectations, does such a magically wonderful experience happen.