Tumgik
#and you know I’d so go back
no-onah · 8 months
Text
Is this a safe space lmao
#^^^ ​me after sharing every single thought that comes to my head btw this is funny#ugh like lemme put this into words#and god I just forgot gimme a sec#idk I’m just so sad I have the urge to cry#wait I think I remember now#basically#when it comes to me I can endure the most impossible of abuses#and I know it#I’ve been psychologically manipulated so badly I started questioning my identity really bad when I was solid on it#and you know I’d so go back#even though she ruined my whole life and I’ll never be the same again after she used + disposed of me like that#but loving someone makes even the most hellish abuses seem doable#you’ll just trot along like a wounded puppy finding solace in the storm#it’s so sick and twisted#it makes me feel so ill and sick to act like that to make myself their servant basically#and when I read fics like that I want to actually throw up but I make myself read it to help me cope#like let me paint the picture#just me crawling back to the horrible person and finding solace and warmth in their hell fire#just sitting down in front of them at their feet and hugging their leg and resting my head on their lap just cause I feel so impossibly#alone that I gotta have some one there because otherwise my body feels excruciating and like I need to rip myself off of it and just to the#point of whimpering in loneliness#THIS SOUNDS IMPOSSIBLY PATHETIC I UNDERSTAND BUT#this is what happens when you’re abused#and it doesn’t help that my head tries to normalise abuse just so I can cope and live with it#so I can love the abuser#eeeeeeee
0 notes
electrozeistyking · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media
yeah no i’m still not here, i just scheduled this to post after a good chunk of people watch episode seven. i haven’t seen it yet. i have no idea what happened and that means this doesn’t count as a spoiler.
but i am assuming something off the walls happened or that it ended on a cliffhanger again (or maybe both at the same time) and that’s why i drew this. yeah this was done four days ago. i’m smart cookie
i’m assuming it came out already. kinda just guessing at this point
525 notes · View notes
sunforgrace · 11 months
Text
you guys please understand they were going to say “CASTIEL’S PERSONAL HEAVEN” and paper the walls like a teen girls room with pictures of dean pictures of dean’s face PLASTERED onto the bodies of beefcakes all while cheek to cheek blares out. as brought to you by fucking metatron
373 notes · View notes
puppyeared · 10 months
Text
its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
172 notes · View notes
loveandthings11 · 1 year
Text
Understanding in 1x02 vs 4x03:
*deep breath*
Early on, this is what Shiv sees:
Tumblr media
This is what she doesn’t see:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Kendall is cornered into talking about the business. Wordlessly, gently threatened into it when he said he didn’t want to right now. Gerri and Karl aren't in mourning. They are doing their jobs, and they’re testing him to see if he can do his. If he said no and walked away, the company would be taken out of family control, Logan would be furious, and he'd lose out on his dream forever.
Shiv sees none of that happen, and Kendall doesn't even tell her about it- maybe because he thinks she wouldn't listen, maybe because she said she thinks he’s weak already, or maybe because he just almost never defends himself in general. But she can’t see his perspective without knowing what happened.
The lack of understanding between them results in this disaster:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
She thinks he’s being cold by talking to the nominating committee, but we see how he really feels. He just always turns to reason and order in times of crisis and she doesn’t really know that.
He has not forgotten this conversation or Shiv’s perception of him here. He doesn’t want that:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Shiv’s been inside Waystar now. She knows now that talking business for a minute during a dark time doesn’t mean you don’t care. In fact, she did it while Kendall was confessing his worst moment, but it didn’t mean she loves him less. She knows him better now and has seen that he’s anything but emotionless. No one criticizes him for turning to reason and order this time. They ask for it.
No matter what happens, he won’t forget this nice conversation either. He won’t forget that his siblings finally see him the way he’s always hoped they would: as the big brother who can make hard decisions in seemingly impossible moments. He’s the one who can shepherd them through it. There’s trust there now and they finally know how it feels. The door will be open for togetherness now, even if it looks like it might close for a while. It’s not that they changed as people, it’s that they’ve learned how to read each other.
Not seeing each other’s perspectives led to having to be alone:
Tumblr media
Now, it seems, even though they will struggle for a while, they have an understanding.
Tumblr media
🤍
404 notes · View notes
Text
Me, progressing further into Maruki’s confidant and becoming increasingly more uncomfortable with the direction this is taking:
Tumblr media
20 notes · View notes
rosaacicularis · 1 year
Text
thinking about immortal scarian who go their separate ways to find themselves apart from the other, only to cross paths a million times on their respective journeys because they think the same way <3
132 notes · View notes
inkykeiji · 3 months
Text
bnha manga spoilers!!!!!
EEEEEEEEE I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
his hair!!!!!!!!!!!!! his fucking HAIR!!!!!!!!! i just AAAAH i cannot get over it because !!!!! that is exactly how i picture touya-nii’s hair to look 🥹🥹🥹 just down/undone n fluffy n shaggy n soft <333
anyway i am sickly in love with him, i’m not surprised to see what he actually looks like after the war, but the fact that he’s still got his eyes makes me think that his blue irises must be so stark and vivid and just pop against the rest of his injured body—which makes me both swoon and sad, because goddamn you’d recognize those eyes anywhere, the very moment your gaze meets his…but enji still didn’t, not even when he first came face to face with them, not until they were thrust in his face and screaming at him ._.
39 notes · View notes
madzillus · 1 month
Text
I started watching Interview with the Vampire. My thoughts are now consumed by Interview with the Vampire.
16 notes · View notes
poeticamethyst · 5 months
Text
Yooooo
Even in alternate universes they stare at each other gay lmao
IG speaks to me
Tumblr media
26 notes · View notes
violivs · 4 months
Text
You know what makes me weirdly happy? Is the fact that there is a solid likelihood that if I had written in a question to one of Benedick Hobbes’s Q&As, and used my real first name, and he (or IRL, the Candle Wasters) picked my question, Ben would have been able to pronounce my name without my having to include a pronunciation guide.
(I, an Irish American, have had to teach people how to say my name for my entire life. My name is also an Irish Gaelic word, which has an equivalent word in Scottish Gaelic that’s the same with some extra letters on the end. There appears to be enough overlap between Irish, Scottish, and English people who’d recognize the word, so that there’s a nonzero chance that an English-Scottish character played by a Scottish actor could nail the pronunciation even if he did move to NZ/Aotearoa at a young age. I love my name, and I don’t judge anyone for not finding it easy to pronounce from written, but I also love it when people say my name correctly on the first try. It’s always a delightful surprise. Headcanoning that he would say it right and think it was a cool name.)
13 notes · View notes
scholarhect · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media
one of those tweets i’m just going to be thinking about forever
18 notes · View notes
emry-stars-art · 1 year
Note
okay but what happens after andrew confirms that yes he has indeed been courting neil f o r e v e r? like what is neil's reaction 👁️👁️
@ myself: wow haha this got angsty
I know I’m in a fluffy mood but I needed to sit down and really think about this (mind maps and random thought association and all) and it is not great at first! Neil’s immediate reaction, I mean 😭
First, here’s Andrew’s side of the thing for your reading pleasure
And I don’t know how to write Abram’s pov in scene form because it’s so like. Heartbreaking insane in my head. Yes, first there’s 100% this thought process (that’s supposed to be slightly comical but became not that, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean for this to happen) thank you @jtl-fics for the comments I’ve screenshotted from this post:
Tumblr media
Second: he begins to feel incredibly guilty that he’s taking this from someone that’s infinitely much more deserving, whoever that is, as long as it’s not him. He was ready for Andrew to find someone he actually deserves. Now he feels like he’s ‘tricked’ Andrew into developing feelings for him, like Abram is a persona that isn’t real enough for Andrew to fall for but he’s tricked him anyway.
Tumblr media
Third: Abram is an extension of Andrew’s resources. He’s still an attack dog but one that’s been re-homed, allowed to be much less violent and treated with respect and care that he can accept even if it doesn’t always feel deserved. Abram keeps a dagger at his hip to protect himself, Andrew keeps Abram. When Andrew asks “not what,” it’s something like I’m not that, I’m not an option, I am not even close enough to touch. There is no Abram, there is nothing here for you to love. You can’t. But even if there isn’t, Abram doesn’t need to be a person in that way for Andrew to handle him, use him, however he wants to.
That’s when Abram calms down, I think. That’s something he knows. He’s repressed his own feelings for Andrew so deep that he’d take it, too, he really would let Andrew use him if he wanted to. And it would be the best thing that ever happened to him. He thinks if Andrew is so certain he wants Abram this way, he can be perfect. Abram can be perfect for him, he’s determined to be.
(But that’s a thought process that comes on so quickly and so fully that Abram’s brain actually does let go of his personhood again. This time, though, with no one telling him to attack, he tries instead to be whatever he thinks Andrew wants. So - compliant and receptive.
This is not what Andrew wants.)
But after Abram takes his time away, talking to both Allison and Katelyn about it (they’re both really helpful in their own distinct ways) he understands that Andrew really meant it - he wants Abram as a person that he’s able to have, he wants Abram’s personality and his words and the parts of him he can’t control. Maybe Abram doesn’t even fully realize the scope of his own feelings before accepting the courtship, this time with a clear head and almost shaking with nerves but with a different kind of certainty that Andrew actually does accept. It takes a long time and a lot of assurance but Andrew is patient, until Abram will return gifts and gestures of affection. It actually does so so much to help Abram reclaim his humanity, seeing newly familiar behaviors directed at him with real intention.
Thank you for the ask, this was a point I felt was important to figure out for a while and this prompted me to get around to it! Probably not what you imagined but i uhhh. Sorry 🤧
(Curious? Find a small masterpost of this royal au here 💕)
108 notes · View notes
corrodedcoughin · 2 years
Text
Eddie would have a pair of crocs that eventually Steve starts wearing but won’t admit that then turns into crocs used by anyone that comes over to the house. Every fights over which charms are used and if sport mode is better ‘on’ or ‘off’.
219 notes · View notes
sieglinde-freud · 3 months
Text
you know ive never had robin s support a spotpass character. maybe i’ll marry gangrel
11 notes · View notes
kiwikiwiandkiwi · 1 year
Text
.
#at some point you make peace with the fact that that's harry’s image#he is a womanizer#but god why do these stunts always have to be with the worst people ever????#i know next to nothing about her but i’ve seen the news about her and her latest dates#so it’s easy to assume she is not good news#but i really try to understand what’s their goal (and by their i mean harry himself and his team)#honestly after the mess that it was dwd and also holivia#and the way his comment about gay sex backlashed like so badly#and also after his grammy speech not being well received#i’d assume the best thing right now would be to keep things low and quiet#like he’s only touring right now nothing to promote nothing to be relevant about#so why not keep it this way#i just would think sometimes that would be for the best??? at least just for a little while#i guess i can answer my own question by saying they’re trying to keep his name relevant and keep people talking about him#just keeping his name in the news#so people don’t forget about him or whatever#maybe i’m being naive but not all press is good press#that’s more than clear now after how much hate he’s gotten in the last 7/8 months#so why do they always go back to the same route??#we are all tired - not just his fans - but every single person that’s perceiving harry is tired#people start to resent anyone who is in the media for too long#specially if said person keeps giving you reason to maybe not like them#i’m not even angry or feeling anything really - by now i’m used to it#but you can’t tell me that the same M.O. over and over and over and over again is good#this formula has already proven (many times!!!) to not always being the right answer#like seriously what's their goal?? because harry being a womanizer is more than well established by now#i don't think we need 'proof' of it for people to say 'oh it's just an excuse for the storyline of the next album'#we actually don't need any kind of proof anymore for the rumors to exist lmao#i guess all of this is me saying that i really wish i could have the answers i'll never actually have#anyway rant over i said nothing new goodnight
121 notes · View notes