#and yet the only thing he got out of it was dead grandpa and girlfriend also maybe dead tree too

[exhausted-kari]

This is my new favourite final girl

[to-the-stars8]

Reviving Love

Jason Todd x Reader Chapters AO3

Chapter 12

The kiss was short and sweet, but Jason felt every bit of it. He felt the softness and warmth of your lips, took in how your breath smelled like fresh mint, and heard your soft sigh once you parted. It had been the first time Jason had been kissed since he returned and he hadn’t realized how badly he needed the physical contact. His body had an immediate reaction, feeling hotter while desiring to kiss you more. You had turned away though, getting ready to eat the food that he had made. 

“Wait,” Jason said, but when you turned toward him all that he was going to say had left his mind. You didn’t need any words, as you leaned forward again, placing a hand on his cheek as you did, to kiss him. Jason whimpered, leaning forward to make it more intimate, but you pulled away. 

You kept your lips close, though, and every time he tried to connect the two of you again, you teasingly pulled away. “Slow down,” You whispered. “I don’t want you to do something you’ll be unsure of later.”

He hated that you were right. Turning, Jason looked down at his plate. The food suddenly didn’t seem good to him, the only thing he felt like having on his tongue now was you. Instead, he altered between taking small bites and watching you take delight in his cooking. 

“Where’d you learn how to cook?” You asked. “Your grandpa?”

Jason nodded. “Yup. Whenever I got mad or anxious, he’d take me into the kitchen and tell me to cook. It kept my hands busy, and I’ve been doing it ever since.”

“Maybe we could teach each other a thing or two? I mean with cooking, of course,” You said, putting your hand on his thigh. 

Jason glanced down at your hand, his thoughts going straight to the gutter for a split second, before looking up to meet your eyes. “About cooking. Sure.”

When you started to take your hand away, Jason quickly took it back, giving it a light squeeze as he did. “I have something to ask you.”

You seemed surprised, but willing to listen. For that, Jason was thankful. He tried to remember Dick’s words, “Just ask her, what’s the worst she could say?” You could say no, but Jason tried not to think about that. You kissed him, went on dates with him, and even respected his boundaries—that had to count toward something. 

Yet, there was one tiny hitch in his little plan that he was trying with all his might to ignore: you didn’t know who he really was. You didn’t know that he was Jason Todd, your boyfriend from high school came back from the dead. Fuck, he momentarily thought, how the hell was he going to play this off?

Breathing in, Jason made him forget everything but one single question, “Do you wanna be…I don’t know how to say this because it sounds so fucking juvenile, but…ah, shit.” 

Jason sat back in his chair, pissed at himself for not finding the words, and let go of your hand. Giggling, you took his hand again, and said, “Yes, I would like to be your girlfriend, Jason.” 

He looked back up at you, surprised, and blurted out, “You messin’ with me?” 

“Not unless you’re messin’ with me,” you said, grinning. 

Jason shook his head squeezing your hand. “No. Never.” 

“I’m glad to hear it, but there is something I would like to do now that we’re officially exclusive.” 

“Yeah, and what’s that,” Jason asked, amused. 

You smiled, scooting your chair closer to your plate, and picked up your fork. “To eat some of the food that’s getting cold.” 

“Only because you’re my girlfriend.” 

It felt good to say that out loud. You were his girlfriend again.

———

Jason held your hand as he walked you home, feeling as though he was walking on air. All felt right with the world; he hadn’t remembered the last time he felt this sensation. It was a mixture of relaxation and goodness. 

He hoped the feeling would never end. 

When the two of you approached your apartment door, you pulled Jason closer in hopes he would kiss you again. He did, and it was sweet and chaste. 

“I’ll see you soon?” You asked shyly. 

Jason nodded. “Of course.”

“Good, one more kiss for the road.” You pressed your lips against his. 

Jason found kissing you getting easier every time your lips made contact. It was a much simpler act than he thought it to be, though private. And, when you went inside, he watched until your retreating figure was gone. 

Taking out his phone, Jason started to dial his brother’s number to tell him all that had happened that evening.

[your-pal-nebula]

WordGirl characters portrayed by Miiverse posts (featuring my OCs) (I got all of these from Tonka Joey's youtube video about Miiverse)

-----

Violet: Is anime over yet?

Becky: Clarify please.

Violet: Has it ended?

Becky: Anime is a Japense animation style that has been used for a very long time and I doubt it will end anytime soon.

Violet: damn

----- Scoops: How many atoms are there in the universe there's gotta be like a million -----

Victoria: I love all the building in this game. I wish I could build a meaningful relationship with my parents

-----

Tobey: My least favorite character is Sonic becuase he's fast like my mom when she chases me with the belt ----- Silver: Cigarettes are like hamsters. They're fine, until you put them in your mouth and light them on fire ----- Cori: Sometimes I let my phone die and envy it ----- Tobey: Pokemon Sun and Moon makes me wish I had a girlfriend ----- Eileen: The wiiU weally isn't doing that bad i mean if they sold awound six million units there's only seven million people on eawth so almost evewyone has a wiiU ----- Silver: Yeah I love slendermen dad men is my men Cori: that's cool. ----- Rex: Halloween. Time to take out dead grandpa (RIP) and scare the absolute living censored out of Grandma. Johnson: That's not funny. Even for trolling, I find it most upsetting. Johnson: I am horrifically furious with you. ----- Victor/Veronica: Kyle got kicked out of his house. He got a few minutes to pack up and leave. The first and only thing he takes is a bottle of ranch. Are you kidding me? -----

[ultfreakme]

do you plan to write an itajun fic some day?

I do! I can feel myself building towards it(though it is probably ill-advised ahaha i have so many WIPs).

I have a couple of ideas but I don't have a concrete direction yet and am hesitant because I only just got back into JJK and I don't really feel like I get them as characters just yet. BUT, if it feels like too much to wait for, I'll list my 3 main ideas!

Junpei transfers to Sendai and Yuuji & Junpei know each other before the Sukuna Finger eating: I have a few scenes in my head for this one! Yuuji going to visit the hospital with his grandpa and Junpei's there to get checked for the burns on his forehead. Junpei's teacher telling him its mandatory that he joins a club, Yuuji overhearing it and inviting him to the occult club. Yuuji and his senpais with Junpei watching horror movies together. Them under a cherry blossom tree because this is high school romance baby and those things are MANDATORY.

Junpei lives through Mahito transfiguring him and Mahito takes him: The idea is that Junpei survives the transfiguration, Mahito gets curious and takes him with him when he escapes and realizes Junpei's got like one more try left before he does die. But Kenjaku interferes and tells Mahito that they should keep Junpei alive and test out just how far Junpei's technique can go. Kenjaku is curios to see just how far he can evolve a human, and how much farther this evolution can go during the Culling Games. So, Junpei threatens to just kill himself BUT Kenjaku takes him alone and promises him that he'll get a chance to avenge his mom by killing Mahito if he allows Mahito to experiment on him now. Make Mahito give him the power to kill him. Win-win!(He's lying just to get Junpei complicit and put him in a headspace where he'll care about power). Flash-forward to Culling Games, Yuuji is scrolling through the competitors and sees Junpei's name on it and on confrontation, I have scene in my head: Multiple small jellyfish the size of a palm floating down around the rubble like bubbles, Junpei standing at a distance watching the jellyfish shikigami float, as if he's waiting for something. Yuuji calls his name, Junpei looks at him with a small smile and calls his name back. I like the idea because Junpei is the CLASSIC trope for 'dead girlfriend' and character who's romanticized and remembered wrong after death. Yuuji doesn't know him and he was definitely looking at him through rose-tinted glasses. So Yuuji confronting this boy he romanticized and treasured in his mind in some untouchable corner and finally truly getting to know him was very fun for me. Also because in a way, Yuuji and Junpei are the first official candidates for the Culling Games (Kenjaku made Yuuji and orchestrated Junpei getting powers).

Junpei lives canon rewrite! BUT! Junpei has a million restrictions. Headcanoning that Mahito made it so that Junpei's technique when first made was taught to be most effective against humans and sorcerers, so in order to keep Junpei alive, Gojo sorta negotiates to the Jujutsu Tech higher-ups that Junpei can act as a curse user assassin and more of an undercover operative who will face humans more than curses. Which means.....killing humans. But lucky for Junpei, he needs to be trained before being sent on real missions and if in this time period, he can prove that he can defeat a Grade 3 curse and higher consistently for a certain amount of missions, alone, he should be accepted as a regular sorcerer. So it's sort of a race against the clock for Junpei to figure out how to make his technique more useful against curses than humans. Yuuji's involved in helping him channel his cursed energy in a more physical hand-to-hand combat manner and is finally faced with the absolute nightmare that is the jujutsu tech bureaucracy and is confronted with his own mortality and how they don't care about his individual life. Junpei and Yuuji basically bonding over their takes on what it means to value human life, navigating being newbies to the life of a Jujutsu Sorcerer, and dealing with the grief of losing family while trying to prove to the world that they deserve to exist. Now.....I don't want to write this....because I want to see these two have a happy ending and if I write this I'll have to rewrite the entire series or give them a sad ending by having Junpei die in Shibuya(imagine how tragic it'd be if Sukuna saved killing Junpei while he was destroying Shibuya to the final moment, slashing Junpei and THEN giving control back to Yuuji). They're both alive ending means I have to understand who's doing what in Shibuya Arc, where they are, wtf is going on in Culling Games, etc. So another reason I hesitate is because Cursed Techniques are very confusing to me. I don't have enough of a grasp on any of the JJK systems to write a convincing fic and I'm unfortunately, a sucker for detail. I think I might write the first idea, before I get around to the rest. Hopefully I can write something good but until then I hope the ideas are something entertaining to think about!

(Also, I have fic song vibes for them! The song is 'Sunset and Whale by Zhang Yuan and Vicky'. It has exactly one mid tier to terrible translation but from what I can gather, it shows the fleeting moment of meeting between two lovers through how a whale surfaces to see the sun, and how the sunlight shines on a whale, only for the sun to dip into the night and for the whale to sink back into the ocean only having the brief moments where they intersected. which hey! ItaJun vibes!).

[msnihilist]

God, where do I even START with Ben and Gwen??

For one, yeah, they're born on the same day. The same fucking day!! That's like some "written in the stars" type shit. Absolutely INSANE that the writers did that and then expected me to be normal about it.

I'm so obsessed with how the very first episode has Gwen fighting to protect Ben. She doesn't even like him and that's one of the first things she does as a character — she uses a shovel and attacks a robot that's about to shoot Ben and says, "No flying tree-trimmer is going to hurt my cousin!"

One of the first things that Gwen as a character ever does is protect Ben, and she never stops.

People who only ship Bwen based on how they bickered in the OG are MISSING OUT, that's literally just the tip of the iceberg!!

Time and time again, Gwen puts Ben first. Ahead of her own personal feelings, ahead of other people, ahead of the fucking planet. Gwen will jump alone into an endless pocket dimension to face off two of the most evil people in the galaxy to save her stupid fucking cousin. She'll throw away her normal life to learn magic and fight beside him because this dumbass clearly needs backup.

And Ben does it, too!!! They don't even like each other at this point in the show, and already, Ben is willing to sacrifice himself when Zs'Skayr threatens to drop Gwen off of a roof. He's willing to face his biggest fear to protect her. He has an absolutely world-shattering, self-image destroying break down when he thinks that he lost her.

THEY GET WORSE ABOUT IT AS TEENAGERS!!

As teenagers, Ben and Gwen are each other's best friend. Of course they are — who the hell else could understand what they've been through?

They are shown to be losers. Gwen is smart as hell and incredibly accomplished, and yet, she's only shown in a single episode to have one friend outside of Ben. Ben doesn't even have that much! He's bullied at school, the closest thing he has to a friend is literally his girlfriend. Neither Ben nor Gwen are ever shown to know anyone at all who isn't a) each other, or b) an alien related to their hero work. Not even any off-handed names mentioned to give the illusion of these kids having a social life!

There's even a joke about it:

Kevin: Ben, you sure this is the place?

Ben: That's what the tip said.

Kevin: Yeah, that's what worries me. You don't get tips, I get tips. You got no connections.

Ben: Come on Kevin. I've got connections.

Kevin: Yeah, like who?

Ben: Umm, uhh, like Gwen.

Gwen: It's true, he does know me.

(AF S2E1 'Darkstar Rising')

When Ben is 11, he takes off the Omnitrix. He leaves it off until he's 15, and Grandpa Max goes missing while hunting down some aliens. So Ben puts it back on.

But first he goes to Gwen. He goes to his best friend, the person he trusts more than anyone in the world, and asks her what he should do — if it's worth putting the Omnitrix back on.

"It wasn't the watch that was special, it was you. And you earned the chance to have a normal life," Gwen says. "You put that thing back on, and that's pretty much it for normal."

Nowhere in this scene is Gwen's life discussed. She's attending a prestigious private school. She's top of her jujitsu class. She's going to go to college early. She's got her whole life ahead of her, and she doesn't say anything about it. Ben doesn't ask.

And yet, without communicating it at all, Gwen helps Ben as soon as he decides to be a hero again. She's right there with him. Of course she is. Where else would she be? Gwen and Ben are attached at the hip, always. Where he goes, she follows.

Into space? She's there to watch his back.

(bonus points for pocket dimensions)

If she has to follow him literally inside of the Omnitrix to save his stupid, self-sacrificing life, she will.

In an alternate timeline where all their friends and family are dead or slaves and their enemies have taken over the world, Ben is the only one she cries over.

When their friend (and Gwen's boyfriend) became corrupted by power and turned against them, Gwen was going to stand by and let Ben kill him.

She begged, she pleaded, but she never raised a hand against Ben to stop him. She couldn't bring herself to — Ben even says as much. "You wanna know why you lost? Because you care about not hurting me."

Gwen is willing to sacrifice her humanity for Ben. Her parents, her future plans, her boyfriend — she can and she will throw all of that away to save Ben.

Ben taught her how to drive. Ben chews out her boyfriend when he's not treating Gwen right. Ben will fight until he can't anymore to protect her.

Ben and Gwen are constantly sacrificing themselves for each other, and the real tragedy of it is that it's not even mutual.

Ben will sacrifice himself for the world and for the universe.

Gwen won't. Because Ben is her reason for fighting.

She's not a hero like he is. She's Ben's cousin, first and foremost. He's her best friend. He's her motivation to fight. He can take her life into his hands and turn it upside down whenever he wants and she won't say a word about it.

Ben and Gwen are incredibly codependent — Ben because he's incapable of opening up to new people, and fighting side by side is the only way to get close to him, and Gwen because she decided a long time ago that she's going to be her cousin's weapon.

Gwen lives to watch her cousin's back. If he wants to fight, she will teach herself how to fight. If he needs a pep talk, she'll chase after him into the rain. If he's pinned down, she's watching his back — always.

They were born on the same day. They're so entwined with one another that of course they were. Of course.

No one else in the show means as much to Ben and Gwen as one another does. No one.

the way i get giddy whenever i see Bwen on my dash. "cousins who act like bickery siblings" really sums them up (with a delightful dash of Relationship Writing Fumble) since you didn't watch it as much, a fun fact for you: they were even born on the exact same day. my siblings and i called them "cous-twins" when we were growing up bc of that

HELLO??!?! BORN ON THE SAME DAY!!!!!!! they 100% are cous-twins omg how am i not meant to ship them? even when i was a kid and watched it, at first i assumed they were like bickering childhood friends who would probably be love interests. then i found out they were COUSINS, and my interest did get piqued but sadly not enough to watch it more often than in passing.

i loved that they were cousins but close enough to bicker exactly like siblings because they spent so much time together. they really are so adorable, and their dynamic makes for an amazing relationship, especially when they grow up and mature enough to not bicker as much.

[supercorpkid]

Once Upon a Time in…

Storybrooke.

Supercorp, Kara Danvers x Daughter!Reader, Lena Luthor x Daughter!Reader, Emma Swan x Reader, Regina Mills x Reader, Snow White x Reader, Prince Charming x Reader.

Word Count: 2900.

Previously on the series - Neverland, Camelot

“So we’re back at square one.” You sigh, looking at Henry, while he is reading his enormous book.

“Not entirely true. We know that we have to lift the curse so you can leave, and that we have to do it fast before you become a character of the book.” He says, without raising his head at you. You’re almost arguing when a plate with at least 20 pancakes is placed before you. That stops your mind mid-rant.

“Thanks, Granny.” You smile at her, who smiles back before leaving. “Except that we don’t know who cursed the town, so I might as well embrace my fate of being a fairytale character right now and forever.”

“You know, there is another way.” He finally looks at you and you encourage him with an eyebrow raise. “Too risky and honestly? I don’t even know if they would agree to it…”

“Would you go on with it already? No need to build up the climax, we’re already past that.”

“Another curse.” Henry says and you furrow your brows. Having two curses surely doesn’t sound like the solution. “A liftable curse, of course.”

You just blink at him when he doesn’t say anything for a while.

“Ok, what if my mom cursed you into believing you’re a part of the story? You would be written into the book-” You open your mouth to argue. “But it comes from someone who knows and can undo it. So, when the time comes, she lifts the curse and you’re not in the book anymore.”

“Uh.” You think about it for a second. “Sounds like it could work. It would be like if we had a countdown watch and after your mom’s curse it would just pause it.” You say and he nods in agreement.

“The protection spell around town gets lifted and she undoes your curse right after. The countdown restarts but you would be ready to leave.” He finishes your train of thought. “Only thing is whether she will agree to this.”

“Well, we’ve got to try, right? Might be our only hope.” You’re almost out of the booth when you look at the pancakes in front of you. “Give me a minute.”

“Can’t believe you’re thinking about food right now.” Henry rolls his eyes at you.

“Can’t believe you’re not.” You say inhaling the food in front of you in exactly one minute. “Ok, I’m done.”

“This was traumatic to watch.”

You ignore him and you both run out of Granny’s to Regina’s house at the end of the main street. You try to go slower so he doesn’t fall too far behind, but you’re still in front of her house way before he gets there.

“Next time, give me a ride.” He is breathing hard next to you but recovers faster than normal. “Mom? Are you here?”

“In the kitchen, kid!” You hear Emma’s voice, and you follow Henry to it. You find both Regina and Emma making breakfast together. The scene doesn’t fail to bring tears to your eyes. It’s too familiar. “Oh, you guys are together, great!”

“We think we have a, well, it’s not a solution. It’s more like a-” Henry looks at you.

“Band-aid.” You give them a forced smile.

“Let’s hear it.” Regina asks and you and Henry do your best explaining the whole thing. “So I would undo the curse and she’ll leave, huh?”

“I know it’s not ideal but-”

“But it’s pretty good.” Emma says. She comes closer to you, putting a hand on your shoulder. “Are you sure about that, though?”

“No. I know nothing about magic.” You shrug. “If this was science or anything related, I would probably be sure, but this is outside my area of expertise. If you two think it could work, then I trust you to bring me back when it’s time.”

“You should know all magic comes with a price.” Regina adds.

“What’s the price?”

“We’ll learn about it later.” She raises an eyebrow at you. You think of Lena and how you need to go back home to see her eyebrow raise.

“I’ll pay.”

“Well, then hold on to it, kid.” Regina says with a smile. “You’re about to become a fairytale character.”

You and Henry look at each other. As good of an idea this was, you didn’t consider all the outcomes. You’ll become a fairytale character; you won’t remember anything about your actual life. You won’t remember your moms, aunts, cousins, girlfriend, grandmas… You know it’s what you have to do, if you ever want to make it out of this reality and back into yours, but still. Not remembering Jamie’s laugh, Maya’s kisses, Kelly’s comfort, Alex’s shoulder squeezes, Lillian’s head tilt, Eliza’s soft voice, Lena’s green eyes, Kara’s smiles, it almost makes you want to forget about this and find another way.

“Ok, the curse is ready.” Regina says and you look up, coming back from your thoughts.

“Smells funny.”

“I know, sweetheart. It's a curse. It's not meant to be pleasant.” She says, making your heart beat faster on your chest. You hold your necklace strongly in your hands; remember your family one last time. Then close your eyes.

“Yay, food!” You open your eyes and look at your moms on the other side with a stack of pancakes in front of them.

“Hey, leave some for your brother.” Regina says, stopping you before you grab all of the apple pancakes she has made.

“Fine, you can have one, Henry.” You joke, putting just one on his plate from the stack in front of you.

“Be nicer, honey.” Emma kisses the crown of your head, before sitting next to you. You smile, putting two more on his plate.

“There, you’re eating just as much as me now.”

“Listen kids, today Emma and I will be working with Mr. Gold to see if we can lift the protection spell around the city. You two will spend the day with the Charmings.”

“Oh, come on, moms. We’re old enough to help!” Henry says and you agree.

“Of course you are. And we will need your help when the time comes. Just, well, you know how is like to work with Mr. Gold-”

“Always an adventure.” You and Henry say in unison.

“Something like that.” Emma agrees looking like she wanted to disagree, instead. “Besides, I thought you had archery lessons with your grandma today?”

“Yes!” You agree, excitedly.

“And Henry, you will be hanging out with your grandpa at the station, right?” She gets his answer in the form of a nod. “Well, great, we’re all very busy today. But we’re still meeting at Granny’s tonight for dinner, ok?”

“Sure thing, mom.” You get up and kiss her head. “See you guys later, I’m late to meet grandma.” You kiss Regina’s head right after. “Bye, mom. Squirt, wanna a ride?”

“Stop calling me squirt.” Henry complains, getting up from the table. “See you later, moms.” He follows you to the front of the house. “Don’t run so fast, I just ate.”

“You know I only have two speed levels. Fast or breaking the sound barrier.” He jumps on your back and out you go, fast enough to be at the station in a blink of an eye. “See you later!”

It doesn’t take long before you and Snow White are walking in the woods close to the city. You love spending time in the woods with her. You love just sitting in silence and letting your senses become even more refined. Sure, you have super hearing, but she teaches you how to focus even on the simpler things. Leaves in the wind, steps in the woods, birds chirping. There’s no other place you feel as in peace as in the woods with Snow.

“So? How are the woods today?” She asks, hand on your shoulder.

“Was there ever a time where there wasn’t anyone in the woods doing weird stuff?” You ask, making Snow laugh loudly next to you.

“Not in Storybrooke.” Snow agrees with a smile and points a direction for you both to walk.

“How do you want to do this?” You ask, putting your bow into position and closing one eye, looking around.

“Like we shall do everything.” You look at her and she winks at you. “Together.”

You miss the shot. You try again. Your arrow breaks. You try again. You lose your temper. You try yet again.

Day after day. Week after week. Month after month.

‘Together’ is the word to live by.

“Mom, can you help me take control of the panic attacks?” It’s late at night when you ask her that. Regina is happy that you’re asking for her help, and you two sneak into her office while Emma and Henry watch Space Paranoids.

“Remember,” She holds you, before she starts. “These are nightmares I’m putting in your mind. None of them are real. You’re safe and sound at home with us. Say the word and I’ll stop.”

“Ok.”

“But sweetheart, you’ve got to fight it. With all the strength and courage I know you have. Concentrate and fight it.” Regina says, and you nod, closing your eyes.

Your mind is filled with visions. Terrible ones, by the way. You see people dying, by shot guns and swords. It’s a war inside your mind. You know it’s not real, but the feeling is the same. You try to run but your legs feel wobbly and weak, and you fall on your knees. There’s a pool of blood under you and when you look to the side you see Henry with glassy eyes, completely lifeless.

“NOOOO!” Your heart starts beating into your ribcage, as you shake before reaching for him. “Please, please don’t be dead.”

“Concentrate. Focus.”

“HE IS DEAD! IT’S MY FAULT!” You yell, with tears wetting your face.

“It’s not your fault.” Regina says in your ear. “Breathe, sweetheart. Breathe.”

“HENRY! PLEASE COME BACK!”

“What’s going on?” You hear his voice. Regina has already stopped filling your mind with visions, but still you see his glassy eyes staring at you. “Hey, open your eyes. I’m here.”

You see him. But your body is still reacting harshly to the vision. You cry and shake. You’ve failed, but you’re not the one to back down.

Day after day. Week after week. Month after month.

You’ll overcome your fears.

“Hey honey!” Emma wakes you up, with an excited greeting, and you roll to the side not opening your eyes just yet. “I could really use your help with something.”

“What is it?” You mumble, still too sleepy to talk.

“We’ve gotta help Ella. And I thought we could have some mother-daughter bonding time.”

“You’re my mother. Isn’t that enough of a bond?” You ask, as a joke, and you get a chuckle in response.

“Come on. It would be much faster if you could fly around and find her for me. Otherwise I would have to use magic to find a shoe and then more magic to track her, and then-”

“Oh my God, ok. I’ll help.” You get up and get ready in seconds. “I know you just want my help because I’m faster than the Flash.”

“Faster than a flash, honey.” Emma corrects you. “Let’s go!”

So you find Ella, just before her evil stepmother shoots her, and you stand tall in front of her because you’re indestructible, and your mom uses magic to contain her evil stepmother, and it’s just another day in Storybrooke. You know, for a really small town, there’s always something going on in here.

“Saving the town with my kid.” Emma throws her arms around your shoulders with a smile. “What mother could ask for more?”

“I don’t know. Sometimes I think being saved probably doesn’t sound so bad.” You complain, getting a tight squeeze from her.

“Sitting around waiting to be saved, with no idea whether someone’s actually going to come for you-” She sighs, loudly. “Trust me, I know doing all the saving all the time sounds exhausting. But waiting around is-is as bad as it can get, honey.”

“I suppose you’re right.”

Day after day. Week after week. Month after month.

Heroism comes first.

“Are you ready?” Snow asks and you agree excitedly. Bow and arrow ready to shoot. You look at her getting in position. “Together.”

You nod, and you two aim at the same spot. Both of the arrows travel together and land side by side in the middle of the target. You smile, excited. “I feel like the Green Arrow!”

“Who’s that?” Snow asks and you look at her furrowing your brows.

“I-I don’t know.” You think and think about how that name just easily left your mouth. Huh. Weird.

Days. Weeks. Months.

“Here comes the town’ superhero!” Emma says when you walk in the kitchen.

“Here is the town’ savior!” You answer with a smile.

“I could use your help out there today, kid!” She widens her smile.

“Doesn’t this town have enough heroes?” You sit next to her, and she kisses the crown of your head, before placing a plate of hot waffles in front of you.

“But only one is super.” She winks, making you giggle in excitement. You’re convinced right away.

Days. Weeks. Months.

“Focus. Concentrate.” Regina says, close to your ear. And you breathe deep trying to do so.

“It's kind of hard when you're talking in my ear.”

“And when the wind blows, or it's raining, or someone's shooting arrows at you. Yes, concentration's hard. That's the point.” She bumps her shoulder on yours. “Sweetheart, you told me you needed help.”

“And I do.”

“Then let me help.” She runs her fingers through your hair slowly. “The world will always throw disappointments, sorrows and pain on our backs. It’s our job to learn how to handle them. I worked very hard for my first reaction to be as Regina and not as the Evil Queen.”

“I know, mom. You said that a million times.” Your answer makes Regina lose her cool a little. And you smile, apologetic. “I’m sorry, you’re right. I asked for help. I need to know how to handle the pain. Please, I’m ready to go on.”

“Close your eyes.” She asks again and you comply. “Are you ready?” You shake your head in agreement.

You see images. Like a lucid dream in your mind. Regina is using magic to alter what you see. And you see destruction, death everywhere. You see Snow’s head detached from her body, Emma bleeding with a sword on her heart, the only thing left from Charming is his hand, still clinging to his sword.

You should be ready by now. In fact, you should be used to it somehow. It’s not the first time you and Regina do this kind of exercise. But it doesn’t matter how many times you see your family bleeding out, totally lifeless in front of you, every single time, without fail, makes your heart beat faster, your lungs stop working, you shake, you start crying and hyperventilating, ready to destroy everything.

“Focus! No fire from the eyes.” You hear Regina’s voice and you come back to yourself a little bit, just to hold back your first reaction. It’s always the eyes.

“But mom is dead.” You cry out, clenching your fist.

“Concentrate. You can do it.”

You can do it.

You kneel before Snow’s head. Breath in while counting to 3. Hold your breath for 3 seconds. Breath out in the same amount of time. You know this isn’t real. Snow is home, and safe. You’re not in the enchanted forest. Nothing here is real.

You unclench your fist. Steadying your breath. You fight the images. Snow’s head goes back to her body. Charming’s hand disappears. Emma opens her eyes.

“You can do it.” You hear again. And you feel the thump in your heart settling back in your ribcage. Beating normal again. Soon enough the entire thing vanishes in front of your eyes. You open your eyes again. Your hands are still shaking a little, but you’re home with your mom, and you’re safe. She smiles fondly at you. “See? I knew you could do it.”

“I did it. I stopped my panic attack.” You say with excitement planted on your face and she hugs you tightly. It doesn’t matter how many months it took you to do so, you still did it.

“How about we celebrate? Guess who lifted the town’s protection spell this morning?”

“Wait, really?” Your eyes widen in excitement.

“Yes! You know what that means?” Regina asks, and you can barely contain yourself, jumping up and down.

“Pizza from the neighborhood city!” You squeak. “Can I go get it? Please mom, let me go get it!”

“Here.” Regina gives you the money. “Bring enough for your grandparents. And Belle. Maybe Hook too. Just anyone who happens to be at Granny’s.”

“So basically the entire city?”

“Basically.” She smiles and you’re almost out the door, when you look back at her and add.

“Did I have any plans for when we could leave town?” You think and think, but nothing comes to mind. “It’s weird, I swear I feel like I’m forgetting something important.”

“Maybe to give mom a kiss?” Regina asks and you smile. Rushing to her and hugging her, before kissing her forehead.

“Yeah, it was probably just a kiss.” You chuckle.

Days. Weeks. Months.

[onmykneesforhotdilfs]

Oooh i'm gonna with #3 please! And Valtor as a bartender.

He truly loathed his job.

The disgusting smell of cheap drinks spilled on the bar mixed with the stench of sweat and cheap perfume, from grinding bodies on the dancefloor and humping barely-legals in the corner, made him nauseous. The music was loud to the point his heartbeat developed arrhythmia whenever a bass boosted song played through the obnoxious sound system. To make matters worse, one of the speakers was set directly above the bar and Valtor was sick of buying earplugs every week, because if he didn’t use any protection, he’s pretty sure he would go deaf before he hit 40 and he once again cursed himself for forgetting them at home.

A particularly high note came on, and the crowd cheered while Valtor cringed as he felt the microscopic hairs in his ears, sensitive to high notes, shrivel up and die. He rolled his eyes as he spotted a tall blonde dragging taller brunette towards the restroom. Apparently, couples basically dry humping each other on the dancefloor and sucking their faces off in the corners wasn’t enough, so universe also decided to throw in a couple about to commit an indecent act in a public bathroom?

He was just about to call one of the bouncers when it hit him – he doesn’t care. Oh well. What can you do?

A woman, wearing something Valtor could only describe as lingerie, came to the bar and ordered a fruity cocktail and for the umpteenth time, he wondered how his life turned into this? How did he go from graduating on a prestigious college, having a stable job and a fiancée, to wiping down spit from the counter top on a Saturday night.

He used to be a successful attorney, his yearly salary reaching up to five-zero figure, a stable relationships, loving girlfriend and more, and yet, all of that collapsed under the enormous weight couple of words held.

His hands worked on autopilot, mixing the necessary drinks while his thoughts were miles away.

Now, whatever’s left of his past life lives in a small condo across the town and Valtor chuckled at the irony of life giving him lemons while he chopped one to mix it into the cocktail. He squeezed the juice out of the poor fruit, with probably more force than was necessary, getting some of it on his shirt in the process.

“What are you chuckling about?” The woman was leaning over the counter, her chest basically spilling out of her dress as she played with the ends of her dark hair.

Valtor raised an eyebrow as he bent down to retrieve one of the decorative umbrellas. “Nothing that would be of interest to you.” He saw her flinch in surprise at the rather sharp tone he unintentionally used. “Miss.” He added as an afterthought, hoping it would make him look less abrasive. Unhappy customers don’t tip well after all.

“Oh. Well maybe it does interest me. You’ll never know unless you try.” The woman smiled flirtatiously while her fingers continued twirling the strands of her hair. “I’m Mitzi, by the way.” She offered her hand to him.

Valtor only quirked an unamused eyebrow. “I don’t remember asking for your name.” The smile was quick to disappear from her face and she snatched her hand back like it’s been burned.

He closed his eyes as his tongue, once again, proved to be faster than his brain. It’s what got him into trouble a lot of times and this one might’ve just taken a cake because if the girl went to complain to his boss, he’d be in a world of shit. “I was trying to be nice, but it seems to me you’re too much of an asshole to appreciate it.” Mitzi gritted out with obvious false confidence because a fierce blush was very much present on her face. This obviously didn’t happen to her a lot.

First time for everything, Valtor thought.

“What I would really appreciate, Mitzi,” Don’t do it, “is if you could stop your 36C's, that you stuffed into a 34B bra, from spilling all over my counter.” You absolute moron! “I have to wipe it.”

Now you’ve done it.

Mitzi turned even reader, and Valtor wondered if he should start dialing an ambulance just in case, but she only snatched the drink he placed in front of her and threw a 5$ bill in his face. “Jerk!” And just like that, she was gone.

“Have a nice evening!” Drop dead.

He rolled his eyes and took a glass that needed wiping just to occupy his hands for a minute because he felt like a coiled string, just about to snap and burn everything in its path.

“I have to say,” girl’s voice reached him, “you just fixed my evening.” Valtor lowered the glass to the solid surface and turned to face the owner.

His brain short circuited.

Though her body was mostly obstructed by the counter, he could see that the navy blue slip dress she wore draped beautifully across her slender figure. She was also incredibly short that even standing up straight, in what Valtor assumed were ridiculously high heels, she was at least head and a half shorten than him. But the most obvious, and striking thing about her, was her red hair. Valtor never even thought that hair could be as vibrant as hers.

In his almost 35 years of life, Valtor has never seen someone as interesting as the girl standing in front of him.

When he finally shook himself out of his stupor, and when it became painfully obvious he was making her uncomfortable with his gawking (really, there was no other word for it), he smiled and spoke. “Well, I’m pleased to hear that because it will undoubtedly ruin my life.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t worry about her reporting you.” She waved her hand dismissively. “Her ego is too big for her to accept she just got rejected.”

“You know her?”

There was something nostalgic in her smile. “I used to know her… or maybe I just thought I know her.”

Valtor observed the unusual girl in front of him. In his several years as a bartender and even before, he developed quite a knack for reading people. She seemed, to him at least, like one of those lost souls that recently had their world turned upside down but tried despite to appear normal. You and me both. “Would you like something to drink?”

Her head snapped up and her electric blue eyes met his. “Oh! Yes, um,” she fidgeted slightly, her hands wringing together and picking at her nails, “anything with vodka.”

He nodded and turned his back on her to find a bottle of the best vodka the club had to offer. He didn’t know why he suddenly paid so much attention to what he’s mixing into drinks but something pulled him towards this girl like gravity and he was too weak to resist it. “Straight?” He asked without turning around.

“Ummm, that’s a bit personal don’t you think? I mean, I just met you.” Valtor stopped what he was doing and turned his head so she could see the confused frown on his face. “I don’t even know your name. As far as I know you could be a serial killer.”

It downed on Valtor what she was talking about and he chuckled at her adorable rant. “I meant the Vodka.”

Her lips shaped into a silent “O" and he saw how her neck and face turned red from embarrassed. She moaned and buried her face into her hands. “Oh God, I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” He picked the bottle and turned back around so he was facing her. He extended his unoccupied hand across the counter top. “I’m Valtor.”

She shook his hand, her hand incredibly small in his huge one, blush still present on her cheeks. “Bloom. And yes, straight vodka is fine.”

“I’ve only seen Russians drink vodka by itself.”

“I’m quarter Russian. My mom’s dad is from Russia.” Valtor nodded along as he fixed her a drink.

“Impressive.”

“it’s really not. It only made me the laughing stock of the entire class.” She took the glass filled with clear liquid, their fingers brushing together on accident, and Valtor felt a spark rushing up his nerve endings. “But, I can drink most people under the table so I guess I should be grateful.”

Humor was obviously one of the things she used to deflect the pain and trauma bullying inevitably caused. “Your hair is very… unusual. Natural?”

She nodded. “Yup. This is one of the things I inherited from grandpa.”

“Sorry if that made you uncomfortable, it wasn’t my intention.”

“No no, don’t worry.” Her lips wrapped around the edge of the glass as she took a sip and closed her eyes to savor the feeling of burning liquid sliding down her throat. “It’s actually one of the nicest things someone has said to me about my hair.”

Valtor looked at her with a small smirk on his face. “That bad, huh?”

“You don’t want to know.” Bloom tilted the glass and took a large swing of the drink, only a small amount remaining at the bottom. “What about you?”

Valtor shrugged. “What about me?”

“You have an unusual hair too.”

Indeed. His long strawberry blond hair was tied in a ponytail, but unlike herself, he loved his hair and didn’t particularly give a damn what anybody else thought about it. “I don’t really care about somebody else’s opinion and neither should you.”

“I’ve stopped that long time ago.” Valtor nodded towards her almost empty glass and she slid it towards him for a refill. “But you know, scars remain.”

He nodded. “That I do know.” Valtor saw another guy coming up to the bar so he excused himself. As soon as he moved away from her, the unpleasant sensations that accompany prolonged presence in a loud room came rushing back like a rogue train and Valtor felt the onsets of a headache forming. He served the guy and returned to Bloom who was now nursing her drink instead of knocking it back like the first time.

“So what’s a girl like you doing in a place like this?”

She quirked one eyebrow. “A girl like me?”

“Not to be rude, but this doesn’t seem like your cup of tea.”

She laughed. “It’s my friend’s birthday. She dragged me here against my will while promising she’ll stay with me the entire time. It took me turning around for her to vanish without a trace with her boyfriend.”

“That friend of yours,” he started, “wouldn’t happen to be a tall blonde dragging a brunette with her?”

“That’s her.”

Valtor made a face. “I don’t think you’ll be seeing a lot of her tonight.” His eyes slid to the direction of the restroom.

Bloom followed his gaze and she groaned when she saw where her friend went to. “Not this again.”

“Again? This happens a lot?”

“Unfortunately, it happens more than I would like to.” She rubbed her forehead.

“Right,” he drawled, “because who doesn’t like seeing their friends going at it.” Sarcasm was dripping from his words.

“How long have they been in there?” She asked while looking at her wrist watch.

“Fifteen minutes or so.”

“Damn animals. I’m never coming to the club with her again.”

An amused chuckle escaped him. “That’s not the first time you’ve said that, am I right?”

She smiled and took a sip of vodka. “Nope.”

Just as he opened his mouth to ask her another question, her blonde friend wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Valtor’s eyebrow did a backflip. How she managed to avoid detection while leaving the bathroom was beyond him.

“Damn Bloom, I leave you alone for five minutes and you’re already seducing hot bartenders!”

“Stella! First of all, I am not seducing anybody,” Maybe not intentionally, “secondly, it’s been almost twenty minutes and thirdly, what happened to your promise of not ditching me? And the moment I turn around, you’re already gone?”

Stella, if Valtor heeard correctly, giggled. “Oh live a little Bloom. Besides, it’s not like you were in a bad company.” Her eyes ran over Valtor’s form. “In fact, I wouldn’t mind taking a bite out of that.” She ogled Valtor like a piece of chocolate cake.

“I’m standing right here.”

“Okay, that’s enough for today! We’re going home.” Bloom grabbed her purse and was about to pull out her wallet when Valtor raised his arm to stop her.

“It’s on the house.”

“But Blooooom,” There was really no words to describe the sound that exited blonde’s mouth, “we just got here.”

“The fact that you're talking about having a threesome with a stranger says enough about your state.”

“I’m pretty sure Brandon wouldn’t mind.”

“Okay, time out. Let’s go.” She turned towards Valtor, a small card between her fingers. She leaned over the counter while one of her arms stayed behind, supporting her friend. “Thank you.” She slipped the card into his hand. “Call me if you wanna talk sometimes.” And with that, she spun on her heel and dragged Stella towards the exit.

Valtor stood in shock, not knowing how to react for a few minutes, staring at the business card in his hands.

Bloom Peters MD.

He shook his head, hand safely pocketing the precious cargo before he picked up the glass she’s been drinking from and turning around to wash it. The sound of retching caused him to turn around in time to see some wasted man empty the content of his stomach on an obnoxious red carpet. The stench of vomit mixed with other delightful aromas and Valtor was once again reminded how much he hated his job.

[milkbread420]

Hey! I just read your Heather hc with Kuroo and Suna and I LOVE THEM! Can I ask for the same idea but with Akaashi and Iwaizumi? Thank you ❤

 So I actually did one with Iwa from another request, here is the link to his:

Iwaizumi’s “heather” ✨

Pairing: Akaashi x f!reader

Warnings: Swearing, Angst(?)

Prompt: He has a girl best friend who’s got a crush on him, but he has feelings for y/n (“heather”)

Akaashi

He just rambles about you and he doesn’t really realize that he subtly relates everything back to you

He sees a book you like? He starts to tell her about it. She’s wearing your favorite color? He tells her that (YIKES).

He can be a bit of an overthinker so he’s always asking stuff like ‘do you think I’m coming on too strong?’ Cause he doesn’t wanna make you uncomfy.

HE WRITES POEMS AND STUFF FOR YOU 100%

She always jokes that she’s hurt he never writes poems for her but like,,, she’s not actually joking

He’s like “I thought people only do that for someone they’re in love with,”

“They do,”

That’s why I wanted one

She starts to distance herself from him when you start hanging around more and he’s a little confused and a lot hurt to be honest

He’s definitely wondering why she seems to wanna avoid you and him all the time.

So he confides in his best friend, Bokuto, and asks why he thinks she’s been so distant,

“SOOO you didn’t hear it from me, but she’s crushing on you big time,”

“Oh.”

I feel like he doesn’t REALLY think much of it like,,, it’s not really his fault he doesn’t feel the same way, and he thinks she should just get over it

But I feel like he’d try to stop talking so much about you when he’s with her so he doesn’t hurt her. 

That hurts her more though because it makes her feel like he’s pitying her and she hates that. 

She admits defeat though, she doesn’t get all crazy or anything

 She’s the one who actually ends up telling you how Akaashi feels about you, because she’s certain you like him back. 

She knows she should have let him do it himself, but she also knows he was having a hard time working up the courage to actually do it, and part of her just wanted to be able to do one thing that Akaashi would remember. 

honestly just wants to see him happy, even if it’s not with her. 

“She came to our game last week, and we were up against a tough opponent, but we won,” Akaashi explained, a small smile spread across his lips as he looked down at his hands, “She must be my good luck charm,”

The girl frowned for a moment too brief to be noticed, “Oh yeah? Well, she seems nice, I’d like to meet her soon,” Akaashi nodded and looked up at his friend, smiling a bit harder. She smiled back, thinking his was for her, “What?” 

“Your shirt,” he started, “It’s her favorite color,”

Her jaw almost fell to the floor, but she quickly regained composure, “Oh, really? I guess have good taste then,” a nervous laugh escaped her. He was quiet, and she was sure that what she’d just said had gone in one ear and out the other. She sighed and rolled her eyes at the lovestruck boy, “Akaashi?”

He shook himself, “I’m sorry, did you say something?” 

“Nope,” she shrugged. Akaashi hummed and his smile grew wider, “You’re thinking about her, aren’t you?” she asked, dreading the answer.  “I am,” Akaashi said, “She’s wonderful, I really can’t believe someone like her is even interested in talking to me, I don’t think I’m very interesting,” he fiddled with his fingers in his lap as he sat at his desk. 

“Don’t say that about yourself ‘Kaashi,” she said softly, “You’re amazing! You’re smart, talented and you’re a great person!” a smile spread across her lips as she sat up on the edge of his bed, “Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

“Thank you,” he mumbled, “I hope y/n feels the same way.” 

-

The girl sat in the library with Akaashi and Bokuto across from her as she quietly read a book she’d checked out the day before. Akaashi looked up from his work and smiled, a small huff coming from his nose. Bokuto’s eyes shifted towards his friend and the girl looked up. 

“Akaashi! You’re blushing!” Bokuto noted, “Are you thinking about you know who?” he wiggled his eyebrows and Akaashi looked away. The girl’s eyes scanned the room, thinking for a moment that you were there. You didn’t have to be there to make him feel flustered though, just the thought of you made his heart race, and just that thought was enough to make hers sink. 

“That’s one of y/n’s favorite books,” Akaashi pointed to the book in the girl’s hands, “I’ve been meaning to read it for a while now, she says it’s good.” The smile lingered on his face as he looked down. 

The girl his the frown on her face behind the book. Did he not know better than to compare the girl he liked to the one that liked him, to her face?

“Aw, you gotta ask her out, Akaashi! You’re totally crazy about her, right?” Bokuto encouraged, slapping a hand over Akaashi’s back, “If you wan’t, I can do it for ‘ya!” 

“That’s alright, I’d like to do it myself,” Akaashi said, “I’m just worried she might not have feelings for me in the same way I do for her,” he looked at the girl, “Can I ask your opinion?”

She nodded hesitantly, “Sure,”

“Do you think I’m being overbearing by walking her home every day? Am I being too obvious?” He asked, “Do you think she’s weirded out at all?”  “Akaashi,” she sighed, “You’re fine, please trust me, you’re literally being perfect, so calm down.” She wasn’t just saying that to blow smoke up his ass, she really meant it, he was acting the perfect gentleman for you, and the blush that spread across your cheeks was never unnoticed by her, even if it was by Akaashi. 

Even though she’d just recently met you for the first time, your feelings for Akaashi were so dreadfully obvious; it takes one to know one, she figured. 

The girl heard Akaashi’s breath hitch as his head snapped towards the door. She didn’t need to look up to know that you had just walked in.

Akaashi smiled and waved timidly at you, but he wasn’t sure you saw him until Bokuto called you over, “y/n! Come sit with us!” You smiled and waved back at Akaashi as you made your way over to their table.

“Hey guys!” you said quietly, taking a seat next to the girl and across from Akaashi. 

“Hello, y/n,” Akaashi smiled, “How are you today?” 

You smiled back, “I’m good! How’re you?”

“Great,” he said, “I didn’t expect to see you here so early, you usually come in later.” 

The girl almost puked. He kept track of when you got there every morning. Something about that was so simple, but so intimate in a way she wished he’d be with her. 

You nodded sheepishly, “I had to come make up a test, and I didn’t want to ditch you after school.”

“What’s this I hear about after school?” Bokuto leaned in, “Akaashi, are you ditching practice today?”

Akaashi coughed, “Yes, I feel a cold coming on,” You giggled and he looked over at you with a proud smile, glad he was able to make you laugh. 

“Akaashi! That’s so unlike you! Is your girlfriend a bad influence?” Bokuto teased. You both blushed and looked away from each other. 

You wanted to explain, and tell him that Akaashi was just going to help you study for your English exam next week, but you were a bit too embarrassed, and the words fell dead on your tongue. Your loss for words made you feel even more stupidly flustered than before and the girl quickly took notice

“Bokuto, leave the kids alone,” she sighed, looking at you apologetically. 

“Kids?” Bokuto scoffed, “They’re only a year below us! You make us sound like grandparents,” he shivered, “I’m not old! I’m still cool! Right, Akaashi?” 

“Something like that,” he replied and you snickered. Bokuto’s jaw dropped and he folded his arms, “I’m just messing with you, of course you’re cool,” Akaashi said. 

“Hey, hey, hey! Now, y/n, say I’m cool!” 

You were still a bit flustered from before, but you managed a small smile, “You’re cool, Bokuto!” 

“Cool for a grandpa,” the girl teased.

“Hey! You’re the one who called them kids,” he frowned, “Besides. Akaashi and his girlfriend say I’m cool, so it must be true!”  “Bokuto, please use her name instead of calling her that,” Akaashi sighed, a subtle blush dusting his cheeks. 

“Yeah,” the girl said, “They aren’t dating,” it came out a bit more bitterly than she’d intended, and she almost felt like she should apologize for it. 

Bokuto grinned and leaned in to Akaashi, “Not yet,” 

You looked over at the girl, silently questioning the exchange. 

She shrugged, “Boys are stupid, huh?”

-

“So? Is it too much?” Akaashi asked nervously as the girl’s eyes scanned the paper he’d handed her. His handwriting was almost as pretty as him, and she found herself mesmerized by his way with words, “Um?” “It’s beautiful, Akaashi,” she said, “You wrote this for y/n?” he nodded shyly, “She’s gonna love it.” “You think so?” He smiled as she handed it back to him.

“I’m like a million percent sure,” she said, “It’s so freaking sweet, and cute, and- hey! How come you never write things like that for me?” she asked, half joking. 

Akaashi furrowed his brows and tilted his head, “Things like this are supposed to be exclusive for someone you’re in love with though,” he explained, “If I wrote things like that for everyone, it wouldn’t be special for y/n anymore,” 

She nodded, hiding the way his words wounded her, “Right.” a subtly bitter laugh escaped her, “My bad I’m sorry,” 

He shook his head, “No need to apologize,” he looked up from the piece of paper in his hands and smiled as he caught a glimpse of you across the schoolyard, waiting patiently for him by the exit. Akaashi smiled and looked back down, feeling butterflies in his stomach before he turned to his friend, “Okay, I’m going to give it to her,” 

“Good luck, ‘Kaashi!” She cheered halfheartedly. 

“Get your girl, Akaashi!” Bokuto’s loud voice startled her from behind and she snapped her head towards him with a frown, “Oh, hey! You’re here too!” He grinned. She watched Akaashi approach you hesitantly. He gently tapped your shoulder and smiled handing you the poem he’d written for you. “Do you wanna get closer so we can eavesdrop?” Bokuto suggested with a raised brow. 

“That’s kinda wrong though, isn’t it?” She folded her arms over her chest.  “Not if they don’t notice!” Bokuto grabbed her wrist and pulled her along towards you and Akaashi.

She rolled her eyes and frowned. It wasn’t that it was ‘wrong’, she’d usually never pass up an opportunity to eavesdrop on someone else’s personal conversations, but to be frank, she didn’t really want to know the details of Akaashi’s love for you. She’d read enough in his heartfelt poem, but there she was, being shoved behind a bush by Bokuto as they listened closely.

“I wanted you to have that, I’ve been working on it for a while,” Akaashi said, a bit nervous, “I wrote it for you, so I hope you like it,” a soft, closed-eyed smile spread across his lips as he looked at you, 

“That’s so sweet of you, Keiji!” You grinned, a faint blush tainting your cheeks as you looked at your feet, “Thank you so much, I feel really special,” you giggled, looking at the piece of paper, but not reading it yet, “I’ll read it when I get home, is that alright?”

“That’s perfect,” he said. 

Bokuto frowned and folded his arms, causing them to rustle against the bush. Akaashi and your heads snapped towards the sound and he pushed you behind him defensively.

“Bokuto!” the girl whisper-shouted, “You scared them!”  “Shhh!” his hushing was louder than she was, and it made Akaashi frown, but breath a small sigh of relief. 

“Bokuto, I see you behind there, you can come out,” he said, relaxing the arm that had went to barricade you behind him. 

You smiled at him, ignoring the other two, “You protected me, Keiji, even if it ended up being just from Bokuto,” you got on your toes and hesitated for a moment before kissing his cheek. His eyes went wide for a moment, then he relaxed.  “Of course, y/n,” he said, coughing into his hand to hide his furious blush.

“Hey! We’re still here y’know!” Bokuto frowned. 

“We?” Akaashi raised a brow. 

The girl popped out from behind the bush as well, “For the record, this wasn’t my idea,” she said, “Sorry y/n, sorry Akaashi,” 

“It’s alright!” you laughed. 

Akaashi shrugged, “Well, we should go before it gets any later, it’s already dark, your parents probably want you home, right?” you nodded, “Right, then let’s go,” he waved his friends goodbye and smiled at you one more time, “Thank you for coming to our practice tonight, I think I did a lot better with you there, maybe you could try coming to more of our games, I do better when you’re there too,” he suggested. You nodded happily.

The girl really wished she hadn’t come to snoop on you guys. Akaashi had never invited her to his games, she always just showed up, or Bokuto would invite her. 

He certainly never smiled at her like that either. 

-

Laughter filled the air. Something Akaashi said had made you crack up, and his attention was trained solely on you as he watched your reaction with adoration. The girl didn’t even know what he’d said that was so funny, she wasn’t paying attention, but she took notice of how your smile seemed to light him up inside.

Recently when you were around her, all she could think about was how worthless she was in comparison to you. She felt guilty for feeling that way, you’d never given her a reason to feel that way, you’d never been rude to her. She actually liked you a lot and she was sure you could be great friends. 

If Akaashi weren’t in love with you. 

That alone changed everything. She was nothing to him when compared to what you were to him. He looked at you like you were made of diamonds and gold and everything precious, and if you were made of all those things, then she was made of dirt and cobblestone; she was there, but what purpose did she serve if no one admired her, if he didn’t admire her?

“I think I’m gonna head out,” the girl said, feeling like she was talking to herself. 

Bokuto was the first to acknowledge her, “Aw, okay, see you at school on Monday!” He smiled.  She forced a smile onto her face, “Yeah,” 

“Oh! You’re leaving?” You asked, “Do you want us to walk home with you?” 

The girl shook her head, “It’s not dark yet, don’t worry about it,” she wished you’d make it easy for her to hate you. 

“Let us know when you’re home safe then,” you smiled. 

“Yeah,” she wished it were Akaashi saying that. 

“See you later,” was all he said. 

“Yep,” she said back. 

The girl waved goodbye to the three of you and left the small cafe. It was usual for her, Bokuto, and Akaashi to hang out there on Saturdays, but you’d joined them that week. She liked your company, but not when you were Akaashi’s company too. 

“I think I’d better go too, I have some errands to run, I’ll see you guys later!” You told them.

Akaashi stood up as you did, “Alright,” he said, “Would you like to do this again next weekend?” You nodded and he smiled, “Great! I’ll talk to you later, y/n, be safe,” 

“Bye Akaashi!” you smiled and waved, “Bye Bokuto!” they both waved at you and smiled.

“Catch ‘ya later y/n!” Bokuto grinned, and as you stepped out of the building. He turned to his friend. Akaashi’s expression was strange, he looked almost confused, “You good there?” 

“Huh? Oh, I’m sorry,” he said, “It’s just, do you think she’s avoiding us?” 

Bokuto tilted his head, “Who, y/n? No way! She’s crazy about us,” he smirked, “especially you,” 

Akaashi shook his head with a light blush, “No, not her,” 

“Oh,” Bokuto realized, “Well, can I let you in on a little secret?” Akaashi quirked a brow, “So, basically, she and I were talking a few days ago and she told me that she likes you,” Akaashi narrowed his eyes, “Don’t tell her I said anything though,”

He was a bit taken aback, “She knows that I’m not interested though, why would she do that to herself,” a frown formed on his face,  Bokuto chuckled, “The heart wants what it wants, Akaashi,” he said. 

“I suppose it does.” 

-

The girl sat on one end of Akaashi’s living room sofa, and he sat on the other. They looked at each other, neither of them speaking for a while. She kept her eyes trained on him and his gaze didn’t waver either. It was strange and left an uncomfortable feeling in her chest.

“So,” she started finally, “How are things going with y/n?” 

He nodded and shrugged, “Good,” 

She frowned, “Just ‘good’? You usually never shut up about her,” 

“Well, I don’t wanna bother you,” he said. 

“Why would it bother me?” She laughed nervously. He looked at her with eyes that spoke louder than his words, “Oh,” she bit her bottom lip, “You know?” He nodded. “Well you don’t have to feel bad for me, it’s not your fault I feel the way I do.” 

“I know that, but maybe if we shouldn’t talk about y/n,” he said. She couldn’t tell if he was just looking out for himself or if he was trying to be sensitive. The latter seemed more logical.

That pissed her off. 

“I don’t want your pity,” the girl hissed, “I already told you, Akaashi, you don’t have to feel bad for me,” she said lowly, hee arms folded over her chest. 

“I’m sorry,”  “Stop!”  “Stop what?” Akaashi looked hurt. 

“Stop apologizing like you did something wrong!” She was shouting. She didn’t mean to, but everything was rubbing her the wrong way in that moment, if he so much as breathed wrong, she thought she might explode, “I’m gonna go,” she grumbled, standing up and grabbing her jacket. 

Akaashi sat there for a moment wondering what to say, but by the time he’d figured it out, the door to his house had already swung shut. 

-

“Hey, y/n!” The girl called out as she jogged to catch up to you. 

“Oh, hey,” you smiled, stopping in your tracks and turning to face her, “What’s up?”

“Do you have a minute? There’s something I’d like to talk to you about,” she said hesitantly. Something about her demeanor made you feel uneasy.

Your face fell, “Oh,” a forced smile crept onto your face, “I’m getting in the way of you and Akaashi, aren’t I?” you asked, “Look, I’m really sorry, but I like him a lot, I don’t think I wanna back down,” 

She laughed at herself for being so obvious about her feelings, “Don’t worry,” she sighed, “I wasn’t going to ask you to back off,” a shaky breath escaped her, “He likes you a lot too, actually,” she said, “that’s what I was gonna tell you,” 

“Oh,” you said, all other words falling short, “Oh,” you said again, “I’m so sorry, I feel like an asshole,” The girl shook her head, “Don’t,” she said, “I wasn’t being very clear,” she smiled, “I know I should have let him tell you and all, but for some stupid reason he’s really worried that you don’t feel the same way...” she trailed of when her eyes met Akaashi’s as he neared the two of you, “I have to go, y/n, I’ll talk to you later,” she quickly excused herself without giving you a chance to say anything back. Your face fell, and Akaashi’s hand on your shoulder startled you briefly. 

You watched as the girl receded into the darkness, she looked sad and the way she walked was lonely, as though she’d never been able to walk side by side with someone, like she was always trailing behind. You felt guilty. If your roles were reversed you might not have given up as easily as she did. She was a good person, she wanted him to be happy so badly that she forfeited the rights to her own happiness. 

Slowly, you turned towards Akaashi. 

He noticed the troubled expression on your face, “Are you alright?” he asked worriedly, “Did you catch a cold while waiting for me out here? I told you that you don’t have to wait for me,”

“That’s not it,” you said quietly. 

He furrowed his brows, “Did I do something wrong then? Whatever it was, I’m-” “Akaashi, I don’t think I’m the right person for you,” 

His heart stopped beating for a moment. 

He forced a brief smile onto his face, “Right, I understand,” he looked at you sadly, “I’m sorry, I should have realized you weren’t interested,” 

“No, that’s not it Akaashi,”

“You don’t have to sugarcoat it, I can handle the truth, y/n,” he said. 

“Akaashi, I really don’t mean it like that,” your voice was pleading and your eyes flashed with nothing but honesty, “You’re the sweetest guy I’ve ever met, really you are, but-” “But you don’t see me as anything more than a friend, right?” 

“But there’s someone else who deserves you more than I do,’ you corrected. 

He frowned in confusion, and the expression ever so slowly dissipated as he realized who you were talking about, “y/n, I don’t have any feelings for her, and you can’t force me to because my heart is already set on you,” a smile spread across his lips, “That poem I wrote, it wasn’t just for  you, it was about you, if you hadn’t figured that out already,” he said, “and I meant every word, I’ve truly never felt this way for someone.” Akaashi took your hand in his and you drew in a sharp breath as his face inched closer to yours, his lips quickly brushing yours before pulling away. You smiled and giggled, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him close. Your eyes sparkled and his did too, but it wasn’t the stars or the moon that made them do so, it was love in it’s purest form. Akaashi’s arms slid around your waist and he held you against him, his head fell into the crook of your neck and a huge smile spread across his lips as his eyes fluttered shut. When he opened them again, they were met by another pair in the distance.

The girl offered him a half hearted smile and a thumbs up, mouthing, ‘I told you so,’

She told him it would end up like this, she told him you liked him back; she told him so. 

He was never the one who needed to be told, though. 

[mcwriting]

The Marriage Project (7)

IT’S FINALLY HERE! MY FAVORITE CHAPTER OF THIS SERIES!!! Consider it a little Christmas gift from me to y’all :) there’s plenty more to come, but I loveee the vibes of this one so much

Story Masterlist

Word Count: 3491

Warnings: Some language but I’m pretty sure that’s it

% approximately the end of the 2nd week of October %

You stood on the Holland’s front porch Sunday afternoon holding a rust red jumpsuit over one shoulder and your volleyball bag on the other. 

It was nippy out, probably 50-something fahrenheit, but you’d tucked your long sleeved jersey into some black sweats and tossed on your letterman. You had decided to wear your favorite jersey, which was black except for the stripe down each sleeve in your school colors and the white words and number on the torso.

Since you were taking pictures, you straightened your hair again and put on some light makeup to complete the look.

Paddy opened the front door, looking star struck.

“Oh, hey Paddy. How are you?”

He stared up at you, flustered.

“I, um. Good?”

You gave a big smile.

“Good to hear. Mind if I come in? It’s kinda cold out.”

“Oh, yeah. Sure.”

He stepped out of the way and shut the door behind you. Inside, Tom was running around frantically, grabbing various clothing items and stuffing them in a bag. He noticed you as he passed by.

“Hey, y/n. Sorry, just trying to get all my football stuff together. It just came out of the dryer.”

You watched in amusement as he rushed back and forth. Nikki came and stood next to you.

“I love my sons, but they can be a real mess sometimes,” she joked. “Let's go put your things in the car while he gets himself together.”

You set the bag in the back of her SUV and hung the jumpsuit hanger on a loop to prevent it from wrinkling. You were talking in the garage when Tom burst through the door, a duffel bag on his shoulder.

“Okay, sorry. I couldn’t find one of my cleats,” he explained, tossing his own bag in the back. He didn’t yet put on his uniform since the pads would get uncomfortable, so Tom just wore some jeans and a tee for the ride.

“Y/n, do you want to hop in front? I’m sure Tom wouldn’t mind,” Nikki said, raising her eyebrows at her son.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind either way.”

“It’s fine. We can just switch on the way home,” Tom replied. You found it odd that he didn’t press but assumed it had something to do with his mom standing nearby.

With that, you loaded up and started the hour long drive. The time passed quickly as you conversed with Nikki, telling her about your plans for after high school. In the backseat, Tom dabbed a little bit of his mom's foundation over the still-discolored parts of his cheek.

Eventually, you got to a small neighborhood and pulled up to a cute cabin. As you and Tom retrieved your things from the trunk, an elderly couple appeared on the front porch.

“Hey, mom. Hey, dad,” Nikki began, hugging them. She gestured to you, “This is y/n. You might recognize her from Tom’s soccer games and some academic things, she’s on the girls team and very smart.”

You blushed at the compliments.

“Why, yes, I have seen you. It’s nice to meet you, dear. Just call us grandma and grandpa,” Nikki’s mother said as you were shaking hands with her husband. 

She walked up and enveloped you in a hug. As you awkwardly wrapped your own arms around her, you looked over her shoulder to find Tom shrugging sheepishly at you.

She pulled away, holding you at an arm's length.

“Well you are just the prettiest thing, aren’t you?” You blushed at her kindness and thanked her. “Now what are we all doing standing around out here? Come on in! I made cookies while you were on the way so they’re still warm.”

She ushered everyone in, Tom holding open the screen door for the group. Tom directed you to a spare room to set down your bags and hang your jumpsuit while Nikki got her camera things together.

You were sat around the dining room eating cookies discussing the afternoon’s timeline. You and Tom would take your sports pictures, then everyone would eat around five, and then you’d go back out in regular clothes for golden hour at around six.

After a few minutes, Nikki finished getting her lens ready.

“Okay. Tom, why don’t you go put on your football uniform and meet us down at the dock. Y/n, do you need to get anything else for your volleyball pictures?”

You answered yes, walking with Tom to the room to grab your volleyball shoes and ball. You were waiting to take off your sweatpants until you got outside for two reasons: it was cold, and you felt weird about walking around his grandparents’ house in only spandex shorts.

The dock wasn’t far, you could see it from the top of the wooden staircase built into the side of the hill the cabin sat on.

You and Nikki conversed as you walked down, discussing ideas of poses and where you’d stand.

You shimmied out of your sweats once you got to the dock, draping them over a metal chair covered in dead leaves. The cold air gave your legs goosebumps, but you sucked it up. You were just glad you’d remembered to shave your legs above anything else. 

Nikki directed you around some trees, had you toss your hair over your shoulder, and took a few pictures with you in your letterman. It had been about 15 minutes when Tom came down in his football gear, helmet and ball in hand.

“Oh, perfect. Tom, would you mind tossing some leaves for me? I have a neat idea for a shot.”

She had you stand in front of the water and palm the volleyball as Tom sent a handful of leaves in the air around you. You tried a few with a serious expression and some while laughing. After a few more shots that included you sitting on the dock, she had Tom jump in next to you.

“Okay, y/n, I want you to stand with the ball on your right side like that, and then Tom, get on her left and hold the helmet by the facemask,” she pointed around, guiding you. “Good! Okay now y/n, put your weight on your left leg and Tom, raise your chin. Serious faces people!” 

There were clicks and flashes as she continued to direct you in slightly different poses. One cool shot had each of you palming your respective sports balls in front of you.

“Okay, are you good with those, y/n? Is there anything else you want in your jersey before I start working on Tom’s?” 

You shook your head and gestured for her to move on with Tom’s pictures. By now your legs were used to the cold, so you refrained from putting your sweats back on, instead just standing behind Nikki watching Tom model like he’d been doing it his whole life.

Oh right… he has

His mom and he worked together well, as if they were reading each other’s minds. 

You studied the way Tom looked. After all these years, you’d never really looked at him intently enough to see the way he filled out his uniform so well. 

His biceps bulged when he moved his arms to flex for a couple shots, and the tight pants and pads around his legs gave the illusion of massive thigh muscles. As you looked back up, his necklace caught your eye. 

He hadn’t tucked it in completely, instead letting it dangle over his jersey, the red “ruby” glinting in the afternoon sunlight. You smiled at the fact he’d left it on, then looked down at your own hand. You’d forgotten to take yours off, too.

Would it be noticeable in the pictures? Was there a possibility family members would start asking if you’d secretly gotten engaged when you eventually shared the shots online? Maybe, but you decided it wasn’t a big enough deal to worry about. Some had already pestered you Friday at dinner.

You didn’t realize how long you’d been out there when a cowbell began ringing from above you. 

“Oh! That’s mom. Dinner must be about ready. Let’s head back up. I think we got enough, Tom,” Nikki explained.

She started heading up the stairs as you grabbed your ball and sweats, and Tom was waiting for you at the bottom, holding his jersey and pads so he was only left in a compression shirt on top. He started up a few steps ahead of you. 

Woah. His ass looks really nice in those pants was the first thought that popped into your head when you looked up. Oh wait. Shit, what am I saying?

You tried to avoid looking as you continued up the hill. By the time you reached the top, Nikki was already entering the house and Tom was again waiting for you. You passed right by him when he spoke up.

“You’re really gonna go in the house like that?”

You stopped and turned back to face him.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, you really want to walk into the home of my elderly grandparents with your ass hanging out?”

Right. The whole point of the sweats.

You set the volleyball down while you pulled them on.

“Now I’m not going to say that I minded the view or anything but-” you slapped him in the chest before you tugged on the waistband, hopping a little to make them sit just right and tightening the strings, then picked your ball off the ground.

“Don’t be talking about my ass that way! Nasty.”

“Sorry, sorry, I had to say it.” He put his hands up in mock surrender.

“Well if you’re gonna say that, then I’m allowed to do this,” you said, right before giving him a light slap on his own butt and darting to the house.

“Ohhh, I’ll get you for that!” he cried, following you in.

You were both chattering as you entered the dining room, where Nikki and her parents were setting up the tableware.

“Alrighty, we have some roast chicken and potatoes and green beans tonight. Hope you all enjoy!” the older woman said before sitting down. The smell made your stomach growl quietly.

You all made up plates and chowed down. Tom’s grandpa sat at the head of the table, with his wife and daughter on his left, and Tom and you on the right.

You and Tom were talking about school things when his grandma addressed you.

“So, y/n. How long have you and Tom been dating?” 

You furrowed your brows, then looked between Tom and her, an awkward tension filling the room.

“Um, grandma… she isn’t my girlfriend,” Tom said for you. You gave him a light squeeze on the thigh to signify thanks.

“Oh! Oh my goodness I had no idea! You two just seemed so close that I just assumed you were together. Sorry about that!”

You talked a little bit longer as you finished dinner, but now things felt a little uncomfortable. 

What were we doing that seemed couple-y? Could they see our little spat outside?

You took your plates to the kitchen before heading back with Tom to change into your other clothes. Since it was already almost six, you both just changed in the room, backs to each other.

You slid out of your sweats and tugged off the jersey, leaving on the spandex shorts under your jumpsuit since they didn’t show through. It was sleeveless, so you needed to change into a different bra. You glanced behind you quickly to make sure Tom was still turned around.

He was, but he was butt ass naked. You turned back towards the wall quickly, eyes wide. You assumed it had to do with the fact he wore a jockstrap under his uniform, but dear God did he have to take off everything at once?

You were scarred to say the least.

You ripped off one bra and fumbled to put the other one on before sliding the shoulder straps of your outfit on all the way. By the time you were done, Tom was at least wearing jeans and tugging on a white tee.

You finally slipped on some wedges and refixed your hair in the mirror. 

“Ready to head down?” you asked.

“Why don’t you go on without me. I’ll be down here in a few. I need to restyle my hair,” he explained, sliding his own letterman jacket on. 

You accepted that and headed back outside and down the steps where Nikki was waiting, shooting pictures of the lake.

“Oh, I love that color on you, it compliments the autumn theme well,” Nikki said as you began taking pictures. Eventually Tom appeared, too. He had another shirt in hand for when he was done with his letter jacket.

You let them take those pictures real quick, and then Tom changed, buttoning up a flannel that’s colors matched your own outfit. You were sitting on the dock balcony posing when Tom appeared next to his mother, who noticed the coordination immediately.

“This is amazing! Tom, go stand in front of y/n and cross your arms, and y/n, drape an arm over his shoulder… uh huh just like that… yes that’s good!” she directed you.

Tom helped you hop down after a few different shots and you went to stand with Nikki as she took more photos of her son.

The sun was setting quickly, so she was about to call it a night.

“Okay, you two, I just need you to get together for a couple final pictures. Act like you like each other for at least a few minutes.”

You couldn’t help but snort as you stepped up next to Tom, him putting an arm over your shoulder as your arm snaked around his waist. She was taking pictures when Tom muttered out the corner of his mouth,

“Your hand’s a little close there.”

Knowing exactly what he meant, you slid your hand down his back, resting it on top of his butt.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you feigned innocence. 

He gave you a look that said “I’m onto you,” so you did what any rational person would do in that scenario. 

You squeezed his buttcheek. 

It must have scared him or tickled or something, because he about jumped from his skin, jaw dropped.

“Oh I’ll get you for that now!” he exclaimed, picking you up and tossing you over his shoulder.

You squealed and laughed and kicked your legs as one hand traveled along your waist tickling you. In the chaos, you didn’t notice the rapid clicks of the camera shutter. He kept you off the ground for a few more seconds before finally setting you down carefully.

“Rethinking that now?” he asked, eyebrows raised in amusement as you stared up at him, pouting. 

“I’d do it again just to see your jaw hit the floor honestly.”

He rolled his eyes when some lights around the deck kicked on, not adding much brightness to the darkening sky.

“Well that looks like our cue to wrap things up. The lights going up the stairs won’t be much better, and I don’t want anyone to fall,” Nikki explained.

Once again, she headed up first, leaving the two of you somewhat alone. Now that it was dark, the air made you grab your upper arms and shiver.

“Here, put this on,” Tom said, holding up his letter jacket.

“Oh, I’m fine. It’ll only take a minute to get to the house.”

“No seriously, you look like you’re freezing. Plus, I won’t have to carry it,” he joked.

You rolled your eyes and snatched it from his hand, sliding your bare arms into the sleeves. His jacket was at least a size bigger than yours, so it basically swallowed you. He chuckled.

“Come on. I don’t want you getting lost up the stairs since you’ve practically disappeared under my jacket.”

He put his hand between your shoulder blades, guiding you to step ahead of him as the darkness began to set in.

% 

You’d changed back into your sweats and put on a tee and your own letter jacket and were now loading up Nikki’s car to head back home. 

After walking back to the house, you had all sat around and visited a bit longer until realizing it was half past nine and there was an hour’s drive ahead of you.

“Come back anytime, dear. You were a real delight,” Nikki’s mom said, squeezing you into another hug. 

“Thank you, grandma. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Will you be at Tom’s senior night here in a few weeks? I’d love to see you there,” she said, holding your hands in hers.

“Yeah, I always try to go to the games. I’m hoping to be on homecoming court this year, too, so fingers crossed.”

“Oh, sweetie, if they don’t vote you queen, I’ll personally come count the votes myself,” she joked, shaking her head. 

You laughed and after final goodbyes, climbed into the back seat, expecting Tom to go up front. Instead, he slid into the other side of the back row.

“You can sit up front, Tom. I’m happy to stay back here,” you explained, showing that you’d already buckled in.

“Oh it’s alright. I’ve already sat down, we can both stay.”

You again found it odd that he was willing to do so, but didn’t push the matter.

Having spent most of the afternoon with Tom’s family, you hadn’t looked at your phone much as not to seem rude, so you immediately began responding to snaps and scrolling through social media.

Tom, on the other hand, was watching Tiktoks. 

“Hey, watch this,” he said, unbuckling his seat belt and sliding into the middle spot next to you, refastening himself in.

“You could have just given me your phone,” you said, eyebrows raised.

“Like I could trust you with that.”

He handed over an AirPod and you watched together, laughing. He continued to scroll through his for you page while you looked on. 

After a while, your neck became strained, so you resorted to leaning your head on his shoulder. He didn’t say anything, instead only tilting his cheek to rest on your head as you continued in silence. 

A little bit later, he left the app and went to Spotify, turning on a playlist containing songs with soft beats that made you sleepy. 

You didn’t realize how tired you really were until you were being shaken awake by your nemesis, sitting up straight in realization of what happened. 

“Hey, we’re about to pull into my neighborhood,” he whispered. You just nodded in response, trying to compose yourself.

Nikki pulled into the garage and you began collecting your things from the back.

“Y/n, would you like to stay in the guest room tonight? It’s almost eleven and I wouldn’t want you to feel unsafe going home.”

You thought about it for a moment before realizing you had no extra clothes and well… Tom.

“Oh that’s alright, my house is only 10 minutes away. Thank you though,” you told her as the three of you entered the home. 

Nikki said her goodbyes and disappeared up the stairs for the third time that day, once again leaving you and Tom alone.

“Why don’t I walk you to your car?” Tom offered, opening the front door. You unlocked the car and Tom opened the back door for you to set your things in it. You were about to leave when something popped into your mind.

“Thanks again for clarifying to your grandma earlier. I didn’t want to break her heart but I wasn’t sure how to let her down nicely. She seemed so excited,” you explained.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m pretty sure she would have asked any girl the same question. But she really did like you, grandpa too. He doesn’t quite show it like her.”

“That’s sweet. I enjoyed hanging out with them this evening, and the food was incredible.”

“She does make some of the best food you’ll ever eat, but you should taste grandpa’s grilled steaks. Those are a real treat.”

“Well, you’ll have to bring me again some time. Oh, and thanks for letting me use you as a pillow in the car. I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

You knew your face had turned pink, but you could see Tom’s redden as well.

“Don’t mention it. I actually ended up sleeping for a little bit, too.”

A silence fell around you, so you eventually said your goodbyes and hopped into your driver’s seat. 

You watched in your rearview mirror as Tom stayed standing on his sidewalk until you had driven a few yards off, eventually meandering back to the house.

There was a familiar flutter in your stomach as your lips turned up into a smile.

Maybe he’s not as bad as I always thought.

%

A/N: omg I’m so happy to finally post this y’all have no idea. Hope you enjoyed! As always, feel free to send asks about anything or just say hi!

Send a message or ask if you’d like to be added to my permanent or series taglists so I can verify you’ve been added!

Story tag list: @jackiehollanderr, @one-big-fangirl, @l0lmk, @primadonnasdream, @bookworm06, @thenoddingbunny-blog, @agentnataliahofferson, @spider-babe, @stxfxniexreads,

[redladydeath]

jhgfdfghjkhgf i was going to just post this in the video’s comment section but for some reason that’s not working so here’re act one of the william and mary play:

Mary: Look, you’re my best friend, okay? And, um, best friends tell each other everything, right? Oh my god. Excuse me. Oh, Maria Regina, it was awful! He was awful, William, my Dutch cousin, or as father likes to call him “the Dutch Dog” *laughs*… I had the honor of being forced to dine with the extended family. My little Dutch cousin William– and was he rude! Oh my god. He spent the entire meal either staring at me or grimacing at the food. No manners. And he’s old too, like, at least thirty, not that you’d know by looking at him, he’s very short, but old enough to know better, and all that I could hear the entire time was his breathing– no, no, no– wheezing, with his tiny little child-sized mouth. *imitates wheezing* [indecipherable] –cause he had [indecipherable] big monster of a nose to use, but I guess that was out of commission. And King Charles II– God save him– and all twelve of his spaniels, seated at the table, eating off of the plates– how am I related to these people?

Anne: Mary!

Mary: Shh! Shh! My sister! We’re fighting! Oh god. Uncle Charles– God save him– William... ew. I’ve never fit in with this entire family and now I find out that my sister’s been ta… my sister– No, no I will not stand here and idly gossip. My sister– no. Sh– no. Sh– no. Sh– nope! Betty!

Betty: Yes, your ladyship?

Mary: Um, take Maria Regina will you?

Betty: Yes, your ladyship. Anne has been screaming for you, your ladyship.

Mary: Yes, tell her I’m dead.

Betty: Yes, your ladyship.

Mary: No, don’t, that’ll get her hopes up. Tell her that I’m resting– exhausted from a fascinating dinner with our exotic Dutch cousin.

Betty: Yes, your ladyship.

Mary: And I can trust you all? Oh, um, and would you bring me an ink, pen, and paper?

Betty: Yes, your ladyship.

Mary: How’s this? Dearest, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear... girlfriend– no, no, no... lover– no, too saucy– um... husband? Yeah… it’s a woman, but we’re gonna call her a husband. Don’t get confused! Um, dearest husband, after my prayers to all-mighty God, I’ve come to make peace with you, for it is a strange thing for a man and a wife to quarrel. What more can I say to prove that I love with more zeal than any lover can? You are loved with a love never known by man–

Anne: Mary!

Mary: You are loved more than can be expressed–

Anne: Mary!

Mary: By your ever-obedient–

Anne: Mary!

Mary: SHUT UP!! –wife. But to my great sorrow, I find out that you’ve been corresponding with *whispered* my sister!

Anne: Mary!

Mary: Shut up! Oh, to be your humble servant! To kiss the ground where you go–

Anne: What are you doing?!

Mary: Shut up! Oh, to be your dog on a string, your fish in a net, your limber trout–

Anne: She writes me too, you know!

Mary: No, she doesn’t!

Anne: Yes, she does!

Mary: Shut up! [indecipherable] If my letter has made the effect, dear “husband”, on your hard ear, I may without scruple call you my dearest, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear husband.

Anne: She is not your husband and your letter to her are weird. Also, she sends me letters and calls me her husband and loves me more than she loves you and you’re a lesbian!

Mary: That word doesn’t even exist yet, Anne!

Anne: Lesbian!

Mary: Keep your voice down!

Anne: She writes me more letters.

Mary: Our love is forbidden.

Anne: Get over yourself!

Mary: She knows unlike you I’ll be queen!

Anne: Whatever. I don’t care. I don’t even want to be queen.

Mary: Oh, good, cause you never will be.

Anne: Of course I will! When your head gets so damned big from all the bullshit praise, even your ugly, masculine, lesbian neck won’t be able to support its weight. Snap! And your head will fall off, like our poor headless grandpa Charles–

Mary and Anne: God save him!

Mary: To imagine the death of a monarch is treason, I could look you in the Tower.

Anne: You couldn’t!

Mary: When I’m queen.

Anne: You wouldn’t!

Mary: I could!

Anne: Nu-uh!

Mary: Uh-huh!

Anne: You wouldn’t be the first queen to do that to a little sister.

Mary: Well, you came in here and started it.

Anne: I know. I have something to tell you.

Mary: You could’ve waited!

Anne: I have a memory. About mummy.

Mary: Did you? Really? Would you tell me?

Anne: When we knew she wouldn’t make it much longer, she asked me to come to her bedside. She had just got her blood let, so she was speaking very openly.

Mary: It’s okay, Anne!

Anne: She asked me “Do you know why I named your older sister Mary but named you after me?”

Mary: Why?

Anne: Mummy said… “Because prefer you to that bitch older sister!”

Mary: Leave!

Anne: Mom liked me more!

Mary: I was named after a queen!

Anne: Yeah, Bloody Mary! “Oh, look at me! I’m named after a fat, bloated Tudor Catholic!”

Mary and Anne: *spit*

Mary: Leave!

Anne: I just came in here to ask how dinner went.

Mary: It was lovely. Leave!

Anne: Was it? I bet it was boring.

Mary: Only for a child but when you’re fifteen years old you appreciate stimulating conversation!

Anne: [indecipherable]

Mary: Good!

Anne: Was he… stimulating?

Mary: Ew! I mean… yes.

Anne: What was he like?

Mary: Tall, dark, handsome.

Anne: Really? Tall, dark, and handsome?

Mary: Mmyeah.

Anne: I’m jealous.

Mary: You should be.

Anne: Did he stare at you?

Mary: What? No.

Anne: I guess he wouldn’t. Not after what I have heard.

Mary: Oh, I don’t even want to hear your idle gossip– what did you hear?

Anne: Oh, it’s just that father told me that Uncle Charles–

Mary and Anne: God save him!

Anne: –Tried to marry you off to him.

Mary: What?

Anne: For some Dutch alliance.

Mary: What?

Anne: Yeah. He turned you down though.

Mary: He turned me down?

Anne: Three times.

Mary: What?

Anne: And here I was going to come in and make fun of you! I thought William was a tiny little goblin man. That would’ve been so embarrassing!

Mary: Right…

Anne: If you were turned down by an ugly little goblin man.

Mary: Right…

Anne: Three times!

Mary: Leave!

Anne: Why?

Mary: Leave!

Anne: I thought he was stimulating!

Mary: I want to be alone!

Anne: Mary the Martyr, you’re so weird! Maybe you’ll actually fit in if you didn’t lock yourself in your room all the time writing creepy letters. Some queen you’ll be! You’re friends with a fish!

Mary: Well, I will be queen whether I want to or not!

Anne: Mary the Martyr, you’re engaged to Louis the fucking XIV, what right do you have to be mad at me?

Mary: ...Have you seen the latest portrait of Louis?

Anne: Yeah!

Mary and Anne: *squee*

Anne: He’s fucking gorgeous! Even for a Catholic!

Mary and Anne: *spit*

Anne: Milky skin, so fucking rich! Full deep eyes, tight little French ass…

Mary: Anne! God is listening!

Anne: [indecipherable] I’m just appreciating the work! Those portraits are rarely accurate though. You saw the portrait of Uncle Charles–

Mary and Anne: God save him!

Anne: –He looked like a Roman god dipped in oil.

Mary: What?

Anne: He glistened Mary! Like a buttered up Roman statue! In reality, he looks more like butter. Well… butter with syphilis.

Mary: Oh my god, you can be quite cruel Anne.

Anne: I’m destined to marry one of our fat, inbred cousins, so I’m allowed to be.

Mary: Sorry.

Anne: Yeah, it’s whatever. Well, I’m going! Unlike you I actually have friends to hang out with.

Mary: Oh, bad company ruins good morals.

Anne: Fuck you! See you at dinner.

Mary: That’s why that little Dutch dwarf was staring at me. Oh my God, could you imagine that tiny, wheezing little man crawling into your bed every night– oh my god, it’s an offensive thought! But the most offensive part? He said no! He said no to me! Oh my God, the man is a slug! William of Orange– blegh! And Uncle Charles– God save him– tried to make me marry that, not that I would’ve! No! I would’ve told him off, right to his face. I’m not afraid of him! I will not be made a sacrificial lamb. I would’ve told him off to his face! Right to his tiny, regal, little mustache: “No, Uncle! You may be king, but I will not marry that creature! Put me in chains; lock me in the Tower; feed me to the ghost of Cromwell; I absolutely refuse to marry that creature!” I would’ve told him off. I will not be made a sacrificial lamb!

*fanfare*

Mary: Oh, Jesus Christ.

Betty: Your uncle, King Charles II– God save him– is here your ladyship.

Mary: Okay, send him in.

Betty: Yes, your ladyship.

*dogs yapping*

Charles: Quiet, quiet, quiet! [indecipherable] Good doggy-woggys! Now, niece!

Mary: Oh, Uncle, God save you–

Charles: Rise dear! You’re one of the few girls at court I’d rather not see on her knees.

Mary: Oh– ew.

Charles: Oyster?

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty! *grunting*

Charles: I’ve just come from your mother and father’s apartments.

Mary: She’s not my mother.

Charles: Charming lady, your new mummy. She’s got those bovine hips, so I assume she��ll be plopping out heirs as soon as James’ dousing rod directs her away from foreign [indecipherable].

Mary: Oh my God.

Charles: Oyster?

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty! *grunting*

Charles: If God is good– and we know he is– she’ll give birth to a few boys before she’s spent. Women are quite fragile, as you know Mary. It’s especially hard with our good Stuart stock and– Oh, Dicky, no, no hump, no hump, daddy has a [indecipherable]. Might we can hope for a few younger brothers– you’d like that, wouldn’t you Mary?

Mary: Oh, yes, dear uncle. How I love being an older sister to our dear, simple Anne and how I’d revel in the opportunity to be an older sister again.

Charles: Oyster?

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty! *grunting*

Charles: [indecipherable] England [indecipherable] worry that another woman would take the throne.

Mary: Yes, poor England.

Charles: Yes.

Mary: Ah, ah, ah, ah!

Charles: Dicky! If that heifer can squeeze out just one little boy, England is saved! Oh, Mary, you see it’s not that women shouldn’t be involved in politics, it’s that they can’t. Their brains aren’t built for it! I don’t even know if you can comprehend what I’m saying to you right now!

Mary: I’m lost.

Charles: Yes, I assumed so. Oyster?

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty! *grunting*

Charles: *chocking, spits* [indecipherable] Go on, up! [indecipherable] Now, where were we? Yes– women are not fit to rule.

Mary: Sorry, once more.

Charles: I am king.

Mary: You are king.

Charles: I am a great king.

Mary: You are a great king.

Charles: Women… cannot be kings.

Mary: No, they’re queens.

Charles: …Very good Mary! I’m very proud. That’s a real thought you just had!

Mary: I’m lost again.

Charles: So, if I am king and women…?

Mary: Can’t be kings.

Charles: Then women…?

Mary: Can’t be great kings?

Charles: Exactly! I am very impressed with your understanding of Restoration politics. As king, I’ve found it requires tremendous subtlety. OW! Dicky, get off! Dicky, don’t let–! God, you bastard! Bite that hand that feeds you, ey? Groom of the Stool!

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty?

Charles: Lock him in the Tower!

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty.

Charles: You made a big mistake, Dicky! No [indecipherable] bites a sovereign.

Groom of the Stool: Yes, your majesty!

Charles: Now, let us break our conversation into greater areas regarding your sex.

Mary: Ah, like needle crappy gossip.

Charles: And… boys.

Mary: Ah, yes, boys.

Charles: And… marriage.

Mary: Ah, yes, my purpose in life.

Charles: You a beautiful Stuart girl– Protestant– a large Protestant wedding to a regal, Protestant husband.

Mary: No, ha, Louis’ Catholic.

Charles: Louis? Yes, he’s Catholic.

Mary: Right, but you just said–

Charles: You, a beautiful Stuart girl– 

Mary: Oh no!

Charles: A large Protestant wedding–

Mary: Oh, god!

Charles: To a regal–

Mary: No!

Charles: Protestant...

Mary: Please!

Charles: Did you enjoy dinner last night? You [indecipherable] to impressed your cousin.

Mary: No.

Charles: William! Were you taken by him, Mary?

Mary: *bahing*

Charles: He was very taken by you.

Mary: *bahing*

Charles: Your first cousin, so you’ll have a lot in common!

Mary: *bahing*

Charles: My dead sister’s boy! She was a real bitch.

Mary: *bahing*

Charles: And you’ll have the line of succession, so you won’t have to worry about being queen, Mary. William can handle it. Sorry he’s such a cold, ugly bastard.

Mary: *spluttering*

Charles: Your Catholic father *spits* is pissed. Not surprising, but I ordered him to shut the fuck up about it. The wedding is next week. La~!

Mary: Wait! Anne!

Charles: Oh, you’re too thoughtful, dear girl! Anne will be fine on her own.

Mary: No, no, no, marry Anne off to William!

Charles: Certainly not! You’re next in line after your idiot father. We’ll marry Anne off to one of the fat, inbred cousins.

Mary: But I learned French!

Charles: And now you’ll get to learn Dutch! It’s not a beautiful language, but it matches the people. The king exits!

Mary: *sobbing*

*church music / exert of “Aria” by Marco Rosano*

Priest: Gathered! His Royal Highness Charles II!

Ensemble: GOD SAVE HIM!

Priest: The bride’s father James (the eventual second)– what? Your father refused to attend!

Mary: *sobbing*

Priest: We are gathered today in the eyes of our Protestant God to witness the eternal joining of two people, and more importantly, two nations. Our beloved England and our at-least-for-the-time-being-not-enemy Holland.

*fanfare*

Priest: The Dutch Stand Stadtholder! ...William? ...The Prince of Orange!

William: *violent coughing*

Priest: William? You good?

William: Ja.

Priest: Do you need a minute?

William: [indecipherable]

Priest: Okay! So… the, uh… the Dutch Stadtholder! The Prince of Orang– William?

William: *violent coughing* [indecipherable]

Priest: We are gathered– we are– we’re gathered– we are gathered– gathered– and we are gathered–

William: [Dutch word]

Priest: Pardon?

William: [Dutch word]

Priest: Sorry, I–

William: [Dutch word], stepping [Dutch word].

Priest: Oh, yes. *groaning* NOW! We are gathered for the joining of two people, two nations, and one [indecipherable] faith. Do you, Mary, take a solemn vow to obey and honor William until you’re parted by death? Okay, good. Do you, William, take a solemn vow to take Mary as your bride and treat her with whatever respect you happen to feel like showing her? Alright, whoo! You’re all good in here. You may kiss the bride.

William: *violent coughing*

*retro dance music* / exert of “Oh! Oh! I'm Goin' Home” by The Peppers

Mary: Wow. Midnight. Where did the time go?

William: Time for bed.

Mary: Right. Yup. Time for bed. It’s late and… it’s late and… it’s late and… it’s time for bed and there’s the bed, it’s time for bed and… we’re married now.

Charles: Now, nephew! To your purpose! God save Saint George and England! *giggling*

Mary: Right, historically, um, all of that actually happened. Well– oh, sorry, I was talking to someone else. Well, I guess it’s late, right? It’s late and it’s, um, time to go do– time to do– time to go do do do do do do do do doing of it. Ah! Wow. A ring… Is it for me? …Should I take it? …I’ll take it. Wow… a ruby… yes, ruby– rubies are very– rubies are red! Red. Rubies are… pink actually, now that I look at it. Funny, they’re really much more pink. Everyone always says “ruby red” but they’re much more pink when you look at it, oh look at that, it’s–

William: My mother’s.

Mary: Your mother’s? Wow. Beautiful. Ring. That was your mother’s. Ring, ruby, ring, ruby, ring–

William: She’s dead.

Mary: What? Oh, I’m sorry. About that– that she’s dead. What happened? Sorry! No, none of my business. Poor Mum! Um, my mom is dead. Died when I was a child so… I know what it’s like. To have a dead mum. *awkward laughter*

William: You don’t have to smile for me. You don’t have to pretend.

Mary: Dearest dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear husband– this is the woman again, um... You’ll find a pair of horns on your front door for… it appears I’ve taken another husband. Hm…

*whistle*

Anne: I brought you a going-away present. It’s another goldfish.

Mary: Thank you, sister.

Anne: I knew you already that one, so you’d like it. I hope they don’t eat each other. Do goldfish eat each other? Is it a long trip to Holland?

Mary: I don’t know!

Anne: You seem glum. Story time! When Aunt Catherine–

Mary and Anne: God save her!

Anne: Married Uncle Charlie–

Mary and Anne: God save him!

Anne: She had to leave Portugal in order to marry him. She hadn’t even met him yet, so I guess it could be worse.

Mary: Yes, but she came to England, I’m leaving it!

Anne: Yeah, fair. Just trying to help.

Mary: I don’t need your help, dear sister, this is my cross to bear.

Anne: Saint Mary the Martyr of English diplomacy! If only you were Catholic.

Mary and Anne: *spit*

*whistle*

Mary: I’ve never left London, that’s what scares me the most. God be with thee, sister. God be with thee, England.

William: …Two.

Mary: Oh. Yes, Anne got me one as a going-away pr– okay.

Anne: I hate him.

Mary: Well, he’s your brother now.

Anne: Please, I hated him when he was my cousin. I think you should be the first Protestant saint just for sleeping with him. I can’t even imagine!

Mary: …Neither can I.

Anne: WHAT?! TELL ME EVERYTHING!!

Mary: Well, considering we haven’t, that’s everything to tell!

Anne: Oh my God! You’ve been married a week!

Mary: This stays between you and me, Anne!

Anne: Oh, but Mary, I have to tell my friends!

Mary: I don’t like your friends!

Anne: Fuck you! The court would die if they knew!

Mary: No!

Anne: But Mary, you can’t tell something this juicy and force me to hold it inside!

Mary: Shh!

Anne: But it’s not you Mary, it’s him. That puny prig.

Mary: No.

Anne: But you don’t even like him!

Mary: What wife likes her husband?

Anne: He’s so gross and I used to think you were gross, but he’s like, super gross. Oh thank God you’re not screwing! Your kids would be so gro– I didn’t realize Papa hadn’t told you the truth about him!

Mary: Oh, what did father say?

Anne: He buggers boys. Said he buggers boys. Said if he takes the throne, England gets two queens.

Mary: …I’ll have nothing to do with silly, irreverent myths, Anne… And tell my other husband I’ll send her the new address.

Anne: Gross! [indecipherable] each other!

*Dutch folk music* / exert of “Klompe Dans” by Camerata Trajectina

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Oh, yes, thank you.

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Ah, yes, thank you.

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Thank you.

*fanfare*

Mary: Oh, good day William!

Citizens: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Life in Holland. It’s beautiful. It’s very, very clean.

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland!

Betty: Your ladyship?

Citizens: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Thank you! Please keep talking, Betty.

Betty: Your ladyship–

Citizens: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Anything in English– thank you!

Betty: *whispers*

Mary: Dank u.

Citizens: Ooo!

*fanfare*

Betty: Supper time!

Mary: I’m not hungry.

Betty: Not you, your ladyship.

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland…

Mary: …Dank u.

Citizens: Ooo!

Mary: I must grin when my heart is fit to break, I must speak when my heart is so oppressed I can scarcely breathe.

Betty: Oh, that’s real pretty. The Bastard, your ladyship.

Mary: The Bastard?

Betty: Your half-cousin, King Charles II– God Save Him–’s bastard son, your ladyship.

Mary: Here?

Betty: Uh-huh.

Mary: Whoo!

Monmouth: Cousin!

William: Let me not interrupt your reunion. Continue this.

Mary: How’s home?

Monmouth: England is good! The family not so much. My father, Charles II–

Mary and Monmouth: God save him!

Monmouth: –seems ill. Parliament hates your father, James (the eventual second) since he’s decided to be Catholic–

Mary and Monmouth: *spit*

Monmouth: –since we just had nine years of civil war, ugh! People would rather avoid any foreseeable royalist drama, so Parliament wrote the Exclusion Act to keep your father off the throne.

Mary: Oh no!

Monmouth: No! Charles II–

Mary and Monmouth: God save him!

Monmouth: –refused to sign it.

Mary: Oh, good.

Monmouth: No! That’s why [indecipherable] is shit! Charles II–

Mary and Monmouth: God save him!

Monmouth: –dissolved Parliament, hoping to form a more moderate one.

Mary: Oh, good!

Monmouth: No! Bad! A group of Protestants then tried to blow up my papa Charlie–

Mary and Monmouth: God save him!

Monmouth: –on his way back from a race to [indecipherable]!

Mary: Oh no!

Monmouth: Oh yes!

Monmouth: –[indecipherable] watching the race, ALL OF NEWMARKET CAUGHT ON FIRE!!

Mary: Oh no!

Monmouth: No, that’s good! Charles’– God save him– house in Newmarket was destroyed, so they had to leave the race early, thus foiling the plot to kill him!

Mary: Oh, God is very generous to our family. And how’s Anne?

Monmouth: Married.

Mary: Oh, to one of the inbred cousins?

Monmouth: We’re royal! Inbred cousins are the only dignified option! How’s life in the Dutch court?

Mary: Um… clean, it’s very, very clean.

Monmouth: Ah, thank God you have William.

Mary: *hysterical laughter* ...Yes. No, I do see William from time to time. He likes to walk from stage left to stage right to stage right to stage left.

Monmouth: Incredibly generous man– looking forward to our dinner tonight! He invited me to hunt tomorrow and all the rest of next week! Very charming!

Mary: You’ve only been onstage for a minute and a half!

Betty: There are more officials for you to meet, your ladyship.

Monmouth: See you around, cuz. Ch-cha! …Ch-cha!

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland!

Mary: Dank u.

Citizens: Ooo!

William: …Welkom in Nederland! *laughter, interrupted by violent coughing*

*fanfare*

Citizen: Welkom in Nederland!

Betty: Alright! Her ladyship has another engagement she must prepare for, so sorry!

Mary: Ugh, what’s next Betty?

Betty: Nothing, your ladyship. I just think you’ve been gawked at enough today.

Mary: Oh, thank you Betty!

Betty: What’s a lady-in-waiting for?

Mary: But I’m afraid William might be cross once he finds out I didn’t finish all the state greetings. I guess I’d actually have to spend time with him for him to be cross with me.

Betty: He’s not one to get cross about things; he’s quite charming actually if you get past the hermetic silence.

Mary: I suppose he prefers the company of *whispered* his men?

*fanfare*

William and Monmouth: *laughing*

William: *starts coughing violently*

Monmouth: I love this guy!

*fanfare*

Betty: You’ve heard that already, have you?

Mary: Is it true?

Betty: Rumors, your ladyship. I also heard rumors of a girl who wrote letters to a woman she called her husband. And I now know a woman who still writes these letters!

Mary: Dismissed!

Betty: Your ladyship.

Mary: Wait. Put the children to bed, will you? Wait– wait, wait wait– just [indecipherable]. Don’t judge me! Dearest, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear– stop!– husband… Let me start again: Dearest, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear husband: You’ve not responded to any of my letter as of late!

Anne: Dearest sister!

Mary: Oh good God, Anne! Still able to interrupt me from across the English Chanel!

Anne: It is with good nice that I write. Since we last spoke… I’m pregnant!

Mary and Anne: *squeeing*

Anne: I know! I know! I fucking know! Ah, someone has to produce some heirs in this family!

Mary: Hey…

Anne: What have you been up to? Oh! My friends are here! Thank you, sis!

Mary: Anne is pregnant. My younger sister is pregnant …I’m jealous! Ugh!

*fanfare*

William and Monmouth: To hunt!

Monmouth: ♪ I’ll sing you eight, O! ♪

William and Monmouth: ♪ Green grow the rushes, O! ♪

William: ♪ What are your eight, O? ♪

Monmouth: ♪ Eight for the April Rainers! ♪

William: ♪ Seven for the seven stars in the sky! ♪

William and Monmouth: ♪ Six for the six proud walkers! ♪ Five for the symbols at your door! ♪ Four for the Gospel makers! ♪ THREE, THREE THE RIVALS! ♪ Two, two the lily-white boys! ♪ Clothed all in green, O! ♪ One is one and all alone! ♪ And evermore shall be so! ♪

*fanfare*

Mary: Betty!

Betty: *imitating the song*

Mary: Stop!

Betty: Oh! Yes, your ladyship.

Mary: My cousin, the Bastard, and Prince William have been spending an awful lot of time together!

Betty: William loves the hunt.

Mary: How do you know?!

Betty: He told me!

Mary: You’ve spoken with him? Am I the only person in the entire world who’s not had a single conversation with my husband?!

Betty: You just need to catch him in the right mood.

*fanfare*

Mary: Dearest, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear– Oh my God, you’re pathetic! Two husbands and neither one replies!

Anne: Okay, so I wasn’t pregnant. Well, I was, but I’m not anymore.

Mary: Oh… Anne I’m so sorry!

Anne: I know. But I will be again. Maybe tonight! God be with me!

Mary: I don’t have to be Mary the Martyr. I can fix him. I can make it work. It’s a job, right? I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I’m just doing my job!

*fanfare*

Mary: Oh, William! Um, I was wondering–

William: Nothing!

Monmouth: The hunt did not go well!

William: Ugh!

Anne: Yup, pregnant!

Mary: Again? Wow!

*fanfare*

Mary: Oh, William! I’d love to talk with you!

William: …but–but–but we’re going to the hunt?

Mary: Yes, but I’d really like to talk with you.

William: …Okay?

Mary: In private.

William: Um… After the hunt?

Mary: Yeah, okay, sure.

*fanfare*

Anne: Okay, that pregnancy wasn’t meant to be, but tonight, THIS IS THE ONE!

Mary: Tonight, this is the one!

*fanfare*

Mary: Oh, William! I’m so looking forward to our evening!

William: Not in the mood!

Monmouth: The stag got away!

*fanfare*

Mary: The stag got away…

Anne: Pregnant!

Mary: Ugh!

*fanfare*

Mary: William, wait! Tonight?

William: Eh!

Mary: Wait! Here, for good luck!

Monmouth: *retching*

*fanfare*

Mary: Tonight! Tonight!

*fanfare*

Mary: Oh, husband! How was the hunt?

William: I got the stag!

Mary: Oh, you must be very merry!

William: I… uh… I’m exhausted. Ugh…

Monmouth: Come on. Shake it off.

William: *violent coughing*

*fanfare*

Mary: I will force myself to love this creature.

*fanfare*

Mary: *screams* ...Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! It must have been a chill!

William: [indecipherable]!

Mary: Oh, oh no! Oh no! Oh, my slipper! Oh, I–I’m so sorry to, uh, keep you from you duties!

William: I’ve been meaning to schedule a time for our talk.

Mary: Oh, you remembered?

William: What was the subject?

Mary: Us. You and me. Us and our… duties.

William: Ah. Our political duties are not as rulers, but as first citizens. Stadtholder means “the first citizen.” It is very different from life in England. For example, no Dutch citizen kisses my hand. In the Netherlands, we are all equals. Calvinists, Protestants, Jews– even the Jews Mary. [indecipherable] Do you like Holland?

Mary: Oh, it’s very, very clean. I’m not, um… I’m not sure if I’m fitting in.

William: Well, I don’t fit in and I was born here.

Mary: I feel the same way about my family.

William: Our family.

Mary: You’re very close to the Bastard, you know. Hunting and… actually talking and I was thinking, now that we’re actually talking, Anne is pregnant… again.

William: Ja? ...Yes? …This life is not the life you wanted, is that a true thing I just said? Bastard! Where is [indecipherable]?!

Monmouth: *whispers*

William: Your uncle, Charles II–

Mary: God save him!

William: –he’s dead.

Charles: …Oh.

Anne: I had a miscarriage. Oh, and Daddy’s the king now. God save him.

William: To his newly crowned majesty– James II– I send you greetings–

*evil music / exert of “Allegro” by Marco Rosano*

James: James II! Boy, you’re the husband of my eldest daughter, the heir apparent to the throne of England, my father’s grandchild, my son-in-law: it’s King James II!

William: Ah. From one very close ally to another very, very close ally– that is what we still are, right?

James: Say it! Say my name, William!

William: King James II?

James: YES! That’s me, the king! Say it again!

William: King James II, I first wish to send you condolences on the death of your brother, God save hi–

James: I was at his bed when he passed.

William: Surely, you provided much comfort to Charles–

James: Oh, “surely provided much comfort to Charles,” yes! He converted, on his deathbed, to Catholicism!

William: *spits*

James: I’ll never forget his final words to me: “Make sure my whores don’t starve!” Men of power keep mistresses, you know… Do you know that, William?

William: …Well, uh, the reason I write is because, well, I have an offer for you. You see, here in Europe we have a little club. I call it “a league”. Not everyone is allowed into it, actually, but England most definitely would be allowed in “the league”. It is what may be described as “exclusive”. A lot of really great countries have joined: uh, Austria, Spain, the Netherlands, even Savoy.

James: Which countries are not allowed?

William: France.

James: Oh, don’t like Louis, do we?

William: No, I don’t! Louis wants to be king of Europe and he– he is routinely invading us here in Holland. Your son-in-law: who is that? That is me! Which I know you aren’t thrilled about, but your daughter is the Princess of Orange. Louis XIV is invading not just my country, but also her country.

James: Please. Mary’s country is, and always will be, England!

William: And as the future Queen of England, you should protect her.

James: I wouldn’t be so sure about Mary. While she is the eldest, she’s still a woman, and unlike you, William, I plan to perform kingly duties with my queen.

William: I just wanted to invite you to our league.

James: I’m very important, I’ve got to go.

William: France is at our borders as we speak!

James: That’s not my problem. Mary was betrothed to him for years, you know, before she married you. My idiot brother made that happen against my protests but I’m the king now! I wasn’t supposed to be, but God wanted me. God needs me! Sixty years of second-fiddle to King Syphilis and now I’m calling the shots, William! I don’t need you, you need me, and frankly, I don’t really like you.

*evil music / exert of “Allegro” by Marco Rosano*

James: Shh!

William: Why you do that?

*evil music / exert of “Allegro” by Marco Rosano*

James: Shh!! Thank you. Ooo, ooo, how they all loved my brother Charles the Pervert– forced me to marry my daughter to that Dutch abortion! Now, I’d like to speak to the court! You all like… gossip, don’t you? Let’s talk about William.

*retro music / exert of “O Samba Brasileiro” by Walter Wanderley*

Mary: They’re laughing, Maria Regina. They’ve been whispering all morning and I don’t– I don’t want to sound paranoid but… I hear my name. I hear William’s name and I hear… Betty’s name.

Messengers: God save him!

Mary: Hello?

Messenger 1: Your father sends us–

Messenger 2: God save him!

Messenger 1: James II–

Messenger 2: Long may he reign!

Mary: Oh, Father sends you?

Messengers: God save him, yes!

Messenger 2: In his infinite and divine wisdom, we were sent to you–

Messenger 1: His oldest daughter–

Messenger 2: Possibly the future queen–

Mary: Possibly?

Messenger 1: Your mother, the queen–

Mary: She’s not my mother.

Messenger 2: Is hoping to reward England with many sons–

Messenger 1: But one’s eyes are to the future–

Messenger 2: He hasn’t forgotten his eldest.

Mary: Oh, we haven’t spoken–

Messenger 1: He thinks of you often.

Mary: Well, he doesn’t write.

Messenger 1: It’s not that he thinks of you as you are–

Mary: Okay…?

Messenger 2: More for what you could be.

Mary: Well, I’m just happy that he’s thinking of me.

Messenger 2: He’s thinking of your soul.

Messenger 1: Your eternal soul.

Messenger 2: Your eternal, everlasting soul.

Mary: Yup, those both mean the same thing.

Messenger 1: Since Jesus was crucified–

Messenger 2: [indecipherable], mind you–

Mary: Yes, I’ve heard.

Messenger 1: A church was born–

Messenger 2: The Catholic Church!

Mary: *spits* Oh, sorry, habit.

Messenger 1: James–

Messenger 2: King James–

Messengers: God save him!

Messenger 1: Has sent us–

Messenger 2: In his infinite and sacred judgment–

Messengers: To convert you to Catholicism!

Mary: …Yeah, no, I’m good.

Messenger 1: It’s the true faith.

Mary: Yes, next time he could just write.

Messenger 2: [indecipherable] reading materials!

Mary: Right, or even visit–

Messenger 1: [indecipherable] all the celebrities are Catholic.

Messenger 2: Wow, really?

Messenger 1: Really!

Messengers: Like who?

Messenger 2: The pope, you ever heard of him?

Messenger 1: Of course! Wow, the pope is Catholic?

Messengers: Who else?

Messenger 2: God!

Mary: Debatable.

Messengers: Who else?

Messenger 2: Louis XIV.

Messenger 1: Whoah, he’s a heartthrob.

Mary: Yes, okay, I’ve heard enough!

Messenger 1: But Louis’ such a hunk!

Messenger 2: And Catholic!

Messenger 1: And… He’s Catholic?

Messenger 2: You better believe it!

Messengers: A Catholic hunk!

Mary: Okay, I’m married!

Messenger 1: For now.

Mary: …Excuse me?

Messenger 1: Hard to ignore the rumors–

Messenger 2: Naughty rumors–

Messenger 1: Everyone’s tittling–

Messenger 2: A-tittle here, a-tittle there–

Messengers: Tittle everywhere!

Messenger 1: That little Dutch devil–

Messenger 2: Evil Protestant pervert–

Mary: Oh, no, no, no, him buggering boys– that’s just a rumor!

Messenger 1: Boys?!

Messenger 2: Buggering?!

Messenger 1: Boys?!

Messenger 2: Buggering?!

Messengers: Buggering boys?!

Messenger 1: More like buggering the help.

Messenger 2: Dutch devil!

Mary: With the help?

Messengers: Buggering the help.

Messenger 1: Yes, everyone knows–

Messenger 2: Knows her name even.

Mary: Do you know their name?

Messenger 1: Well, I’ve said everyone–

Messenger 2: We’re part of everyone–

Mary: So, yes?

Messengers: Yes!

Mary: What’s his name?

Messenger 1: His name?

Messenger 2: His name?

Messengers: Squinty Betty!

Messenger 1: Squinty Betty’s a man?

Messenger 2: I didn’t know she was a man!

Messeger 1: No, I bet Betty’s a man.

Messenger 2: No, man, she’s a wo-man.

Messenger 1: Wo-man?

Messengers: Wo-man, she’s a wo-man!

Mary: Wait, Squinty Betty?!

Messenger 1: And the Dutch devil!

Messenger 2: Evil Dutch devil!

Messenger 1: Evil!

Messenger 2: Evil: that’s not good!

Messenger 1: No, it’s not good!

Messenger 2: That’s the opposite of good!

Messengers: And what’s the opposite of good?

Mary: Evil!

Messangers: *scream*

Mary: *screams*

Messenger 1: [indecipherable] James–

Messenger 2: King James–

Messengers: God save him!

Messenger 1: Has the fires burning.

Mary: Fires?

Messenger 2: To feel the heat.

Messenger 1: Ow!

Messenger 2: Careful.

Messenger 1: It’s the heat.

Messenger 2: I feel it.

Messenger 1: [indecipherable] King James [indecipherable] our beloved England [indecipherable] burning more evil people than Charles ever did.

Mary: Wait, he’s burning people?

Messenger 2: [indecipherable]

Messenger 1: Evil people!

Mary: He’s burning people?!

Messenger 2: [indecipherable]

Messenger 1: Evil people!

Mary: Father’s burning people?!

Messenger 2: [indecipherable]

Messenger 1: Evil people!

Mary: Jesus!

Messengers: Praise him!

Messenger 1: Praise Jesus!

Messenger 2: Praise God!

Messenger 1: Praise the pope!

Messenger 2: And above all, praise the king!

Messengers: God save King James II, long may he reign!

Mary: …William and Betty– no… No, I’ll have nothing to do with silly, irreverent myths… Betty! Um, throw these away. And, um, put the children to bed, will you? Oh– oh– oh– oh– oh, um… question: how is it you always to find William in such a talkative mood?

Betty: I just run into him.

*laid back retro music / exert of “Rain” by Walter Wanderley*

Mary: It’s late. No, you don’t have to leave. You were in Betty’s room. Do you know how I know that? Maybe because the entire court is talking about it! No, you don’t need to talk! I have tried to get you to talk for months, you do not need to talk now! Fuck off, Betty! The longest I’ve ever spent with you is [indecipherable]. You’re impossible! You’re thick! Uncaring! Cruel! My life here is suffering and now you make me the fool? To my father, to the court, and to myself! I’m the fool! You know, it was better when I thought you were gay; I thought “Well, at least it’s not my fault” but now I know, “No, it is my fault!” You turned down marrying me once before, why did you have to say yes this time? I was engaged to Louis XIV! I could’ve been in Versailles, in the most beautiful place on Earth and I would’ve been happy– no, I would be happy! And I would be liked and my family would love me and I would’ve done everything right, but then you came along! And ruined it! And everything! And me! And– this isn’t right! No! This is not how this was supposed to go! It was supposed to be me and Louis and it would’ve been right and normal and then I would be normal and happy and I don’t know– I don’t know why you had to say yes this time! Louis– Louis– Louis is– Louis– Louis– Louis– Louis– Louis– Louis– Louis’ the king! Right? Right? And he’s beautiful! I assume. I’ve seen the portraits– which are rarely accurate– but I’ve always wanted to marry him! Well, I was always supposed to marry him– but at least he’s nice! Yes, I’ve not met him, but at least I’ve heard that he’s ni– well, I guess I’ve actually not heard anything, but I was alway supposed to ma– Well, I guess I always– Okay, well, I guess I’ve never really actually thought about it! Well, I guess I never actually like Louis, or men… Men in general. I mean, I write to a woman who I call my husband, and I’ve always had a crush on her, but she’s not very nice to me, and she writes to my sister more than she writes to me, AND I DON’T KNOW IF I’M A LESBIAN, OKAY?! I don’t like men! But I don’t know if I like women either– historically speaking, there’s some things we just can’t know about me, okay, historically speaking– but personally speaking, you know what? I’M FIFTEEN YEARS OLD!! How am I supposed to know?! You know what? No! I didn’t want to marry Louis, now that I think about it, because, well, I never actually thought about it because, well, I’M NEVER SUPPOSED TO THINK! But I am gonna think! Like you said, we’re just first citizens here, right? So I’m allowed to think! So I’m gonna think! So I’m gonna think! Right, let me think! …Okay. I have something to say. I’m fifteen years old, William. Do you have any idea how scary this is? Leaving my country, marrying you, a stranger, I… I don’t speak the language, I don’t have any friends, and you, my husband, are still a stranger. You don’t have to love me. You don’t have to like me. But please don’t be cruel to me. I… I do not know how much… more a fifteen year old girl can take.

William: …Betty’s a spy. Before I married you, I had asked her to inform me about you.

Mary: Yeah, a spy, that’s the best you could come up with–

William: It’s true.

Mary: Yes, my lady-in-waiting is a spy! …Well, what did Betty the spy say?

William: She said you weren’t like your family.

Mary: Well, I tried to be like them.

William: I never tried.

Mary: Well, I think that makes you honest.

William: But not liked.

Mary: Well, they don’t like either of us. We share that at least.

William: I need to say something.

Mary: Okay! Good! Yeah! Okay! I’m here! I can listen! …Is it a problem? Is it personal? Is it about what I think it’s about? I know what it is, William.

William: You do?

Mary: Yes. It’s about–

Mary and William: Your penis / Your father

William: Wait, what?!

Mary: What about my father?

William: He terrifies me.

Mary: Oh, yeah, me too.

William: The balance of peace in this world is a delicate thing and James isn’t.

Mary: You can talk to me about these things, William. I know who my father is, you’re not going to hurt my feelings.

William: Yes… My penis?

Mary: Oh, um, well, I mean… why haven’t we…?

William: I’m uncomfortable around–

Mary: Me.

William: …people.

Mary: Oh, yeah, well, same, haha... But, um… It’s just a job, right? We would just be… doing our… our job.

*classical music / exert of “Zadok The Priest, Hwv 258″ by the English Chamber Orchestra*

William: *panting*

William: *panting*

William: *panting*

Mary: I HAVE NEWS! …I’M PREGNANT!! I did it! William did it! We, um… well, obviously, we did it. Oh my God, I feel a strange thing!

William: Are you okay?!

Mary: No! Yes! No! …I feel… happy.

*cheerful folk music / “Bransle de Bourgogne” by Brisk Recorder Quartet Amsterdam*

Anne: I have news!

Mary: Hello, Anne!

Anne: Hello, Mary.

Mary: You’re pregnant?

Anne: No, Mumsy is.

Mary: She’s not our mother.

Anne: They say if it’s a boy, God has chosen to make England Catholic again, but that’s only a 50-50 chance.

Mary: No, he wouldn’t baptize him Catholic, Anne.

Anne: I wouldn’t be so sure.

Mary: But we’ve just had nine years of civil war, why would he lead us into another?

Anne: To save us from the Dutch Devil.

William: Me?

Anne: I prefer “the Dutch Abortion” but “devil” isn’t bad. Gotta go!

Mary: God be with thee, Anne.

Anne: P.S. I may be pregnant, not sure.

*cheerful folk music / “Bransle de Bourgogne” by Brisk Recorder Quartet Amsterdam*

Mary: Ohhh!

Messengers: Glorious day!

Messenger 1: Tra-la!

Messenger 2: We’ve been sent to you by your father, the king!

Messenger 1: God save him!

Messenger 2: Long may he reign!

Mary: Again, he could always just write.

Messenger 1: He has his own pregnancy to attend to.

Messenger 2: His future son!

Mary: Are you certain about that?

Messenger 1: God ordained it!

Messenger 2: A Catholic England!

Messengers: Tra-la!

Messenger 1: We’ve been sent to beseech you.

Messenger 2: Consider your child’s–

Messenger 1: Everlasting soul!

Messenger 2: Baptize your child in the Catholic faith!

Mary: *spits* …morning sickness.

Messenger 1: For your child!

Messenger 2: For your father!

Messenger 1: You must respect him!

Messenger 2: Honor him!

Messenger 1: It’s in the Bible!

Messenger 2: “Honor thy father”!

Messengers: The Fifth Commandment!

Messenger 1: Honor the king of England!

Messenger 2: God save him!

Messenger 1: Long may he reign!

Messenger 2: For England!

Messengers: Make the baby Catholic!

William: Mary?

Mary: Yes?

William: Honor is not obeying.

*cheerful folk music / “Bransle de Bourgogne” by Brisk Recorder Quartet Amsterdam*

Anne: I have news!

Mary: You’re pregnant.

Anne: Besides that, Mary, but yes.

Mary: Oh, congratulations!

Anne: Yes, same to you!

Mary: Thank you!

Anne: Thank you! I have news: people are talking about Mother’s pregnancy–

Mary: Ah, she’s not our mother.

Anne: –And they think it’s all a big fake! Everyone is saying how [video skips]

Mary: Who’s saying that?

Anne: The court, Parliament, everyone! Oh, they don’t like Papa; they say every nineteen out of twenty want him gone.

Mary: Yes, but not likely cause the king does not–

William: Mary–

Anne: Ew!

Mary: Anne!

Anne: Sorry… Hello, William… glad you got my sister pregnant. *retches*

Mary: No. No, it’s not right for me to dance… No! No, I can have this moment! I can be happy! Yeah, nothing’s gonna stop me– *claps* –from enjoying this moment! Go ahead!

*cheerful folk music / “Bransle de Bourgogne” by Brisk Recorder Quartet Amsterdam*

Monmouth: Ah! I thank you for the generosity both you and William have shown me over the last undetermined period of time, but I must leave.

William: Oh, where’re you going? I was going to plan another hunt.

Monmouth: There comes a time in every mans life where the cruel, [indecipherable] eye of destiny looks upon him! The hero of every story has his moment of action! [indecipherable] standing on the precipice of glory to see the apotheosis of my journey’s end on that glorious mountain green! Today I sail! This story shall no longer wander unguided like an orphan clinging from one vague historical anecdote to another! No! Search no longer, poor play, for you have found your hero! And that hero… it’s me. Someone has to save our England! I have a mighty army of almost one hundred men! Eighty two to be exact!

Mary: Wait, with eighty two men you’re planning to–

Monmouth: Invade England, seize the crown, depose your father, my uncle, and save England from Catholic *spits* tyranny?

Mary: You’re planning on doing this with…

Monmouth: Eighty two men! Historically, this is what I did, so yah. [indecipherable] sweet cousin, it will be a Protestant England! ALL HAIL KING BASTARD THE FIRST! CHA-CHAH! Ah! He-yaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

Mary: Eighty two men can’t overthrow the king of England!

William: He’s hoping the people will rise.

Mary: What would they do to father?

William: Kill him.

Mary: Ah! Ah!

William: Okay, okay, okay! The Bastard doesn’t have any support, your father will be fine! You can have this moment; you deserve to be happy.

Mary: How? I may not like my family, but I love them. Yes, I-I deserve to be happy, but Father doesn’t deserve to die!

William: He won’t, he’ll be fine!

Mary: You can’t know that for sure.

William: I do! …I-I promise you– I-I… I promise on the life of our child that nothing will happen to your father. I’ll see to it.

Mary: You will?

William: Mmhm.

Mary: …Okay… Okay, yes, okay… I’m happy.

William: Rest. Nurse? Take my wife to her bedchamber. Make sure she doesn’t want for anything.

Mary: Ooo!

William: [indecipherable]. James?

*evil music / exert of “Allegro” by Marco Rosano*

James: James?! Use my full title!

William: I have grave news.

James: Oh, has France invaded you again?

William: Your nephew, the Duke of Monmouth–

James: Who?

William: …The Bastard.

James: Oh, why didn’t you say?! How is the lad?

William: He’s leading an army to depose you and take the crown for himself.

James: *laughs* You’re having a laugh! …Shit! How dare he! Doesn’t he know who I am?! I’m the king! I’m very well respected and loved– everybody loves me! *gasps* Why doesn’t he love me?! Oh, he’s just a little shit bastard, I’ll crush him! How dare he not see how awesome I am! How powerful and strong and– oh! I am so mad right now! It was a good day too, it was going really well, I had just finished telling the queen “I’m gonna make it a good one today, you know!” Ugh, I am so mad right now I’m literally shaking! *gasps* I need to eat something!

William: I hope you now see that our relationship is very…

*execution drums / exert from “March to the Scaffold” by Paul Edward*

Headsman: *giggling* For your crimes against the crown, you are sentenced to death!

James: Say hello to your father for me, boy. Any last words?

Monmouth: Fuck off!

James: How dare you! Kill the bastard!

Headsman: God save the king!

James: No one questions my authority!

Monmouth: Piss off!

James: Bastard?!

Monmouth: I have still a few [indecipherable]

James: How dare you! [indecipherable]

Headsman: Thank you. One more!

James: Who’s the douchebag now, huh?

Monmouth: You are!

James: Bastard! [indecipherable] I am not a douchebag, I am the king of England!

Monmouth: Douche of England more like it!

James: Cut off his head!

Headsman: [indecipherable] does anyone want to take over, huh?

Monmouth: It takes– ugh! –and this is all true– ugh! –five blows! Ugh! King Douche II! Ugh– *splutters*

James: Who’s the douchebag now, huh? Not me. I am not a douche! You hear me, Bastard?! I am not a douche! You hear me, England? I am not a douche! I am King James II! Not King Douche II! King James II! Charles didn’t respect me, and you, you didn’t respect me, but my people will. OR I’LL FUCKING MAKE THEM! They will fucking tremble in love and adoration– ohh! I want hundreds to pay for this bastard’s actions! I don’t care who they were, if they even so much as saw him walk by, they are to be executed. Churchyard trees are to be littered with corpses, the military men will be order to play in time with the twitching of their feet! And if you think that this is too much, too cruel, I’ll remind you: One, I am just being historically accurate, and two, I am the goddamn motherfucking King of England! William!

William: …your majesty.

James: Oh, I couldn’t’ve done it without you! …But I know what this is. Scared to lose a few more windmills to Louis, huh? What, you thought that you could bribe me with this little quid-pro-quo?

William: I didn’t do it for you, I did it for Mary.

James: Mary? Don’t you dare bring my daughter into this. What? You thought that I was so stupid that little nugget of information would have me on all-fours like a whipped bitch begging to do you any favor you asked? No! That little shit was nothing! I could have fought him off while wiping my ass! I owe you nothing! France may be at your borders, but England could join them just as easily! God knows Louis and I talk about it. *laughs* Tip-toe around me, William. Now, I’d like to speak to my daughter. Now!

William: Mary, could you come here, please? I have a letter for you from your father.

Mary: He’s safe! Thank you, William!

James: Mary, my eldest daughter! *laughs* You know, I fought your uncle Charles about you having to marry that–

Mary: [indecipherable] William’s wonderful, actually. Yes, I–I miss my home very much, but Holland, it’s very, very clean.

James: [indecipherable] they tell me you’re considering a Catholic baptism.

Mary: Oh, no I’m not, Father.

James: You have a responsibility to me, Mary. Biblically, I am your father and you must honor me.

Mary: Well– I do honor you.

James: Then you must obey me.

Mary: Well, honor is not obeying.

James: From King Douche II to you now?

Mary: King Douche?

James: How dare you! I am very [indecipherable] you talk back to me. I am your father and you must honor me!

Mary: Enough of this.

James: You will make the child Catholic!

Mary: Stop!

James: We all know you have no choice. You’re a prisoner.

Mary: Please…

James: [indecipherable], Mary, there’s hope in the distance!

Mary: What are you suggesting?

James: Just because you… lie with the Dutch Dog doesn’t mean you need to get its flees.

Mary: He’s my husband!

James: *laughs* William isn’t long for this world.

Mary: What are you planning?

James: Oh, come now!

Mary: What are you plann– ah! Ah!

James: *laughs* You look like him. Can’t even walk without wheezing, spits blood; your time in the tower is almost over, Mary.

Mary: He is the father of my child. William, could you come here, please?

James: *scoffs* Is he the father? Last I heard, he couldn’t perform.

Mary: You’re one to talk!

James: My performance isn’t to be questioned!

Mary: I know the rumors of the queen’s great belly!

James: [indecipherable] rumors: just a few!

Mary: Nineteen out of twenty! That’s what– ah! Ah!

James: Make the child Catholic!

Mary: *spits*

James: Your mother–

Mary: She’s not my mother!

James: No, your real mother! Remember the day she died?

Mary: Please, Father, I’m in pain! I don’t want–

James: The day she died the priest came to administer her last rites, to cleanse her soul. Without it, your mother would be damned for all eternity! Her skin would scorch, blisters would form– weeping blisters!

Mary: *voice breaking* …William?

James: A priest came… and she refused him.

Mary: William! …That’s a lie!

James: After my counseling she refused the Protestant priest. The Catholic bishop was called in and all was confessed. So, in your philosophy, Mary, is it your mother or your child who’s damned to unfathomable pain and suffering? Which is the one true faith? If you baptize that child Protestant, it means you believe it’s your mother suffering, right now as we speak. Have you ever considered hellfire, Mary? *laughs* It’s something to think about. Oh! Your new mummy’s in labour now. Got to run.

Anne: Mary– and William *scoffs*– the queen’s had a baby. It’s a boy. They’ve baptized him Catholic *spits* toldja so. But there’s something else. I have some gossip! All of London– they think it’s a changeling! They think it’s not a real child. They think she snuck a child into her bed to pass off as our brother! Oh! Papa’s going mad. Something’s going to happen. Something bad.

William: May I see it?

Betty: There’s nothing to see. ...You should go to her, William.

*dramatic music / exert from “2020” by SUUNS*

♪ And what you see is really what you see ♪ ♪ What you, what you, what you, what you ♪ ♪ Do what you please, the thing what you see ♪ ♪ What you, what you, what you, what you ♪ ♪ And what you see you feel ♪ ♪ Coming real, take your way ♪ ♪ All through the way… ♪

~ Intermission ~

*guitar strumming*

Chorus: ♪ Good fortune [indecipherable] William and Mary [indecipherable]-tend ♪ ♪ May glories increase and their lives never end ♪ ♪ [indecipherable] daily successes our nation may find ♪ ♪ For England [indecipherable] they both are designed ♪

Mary: William?

William: Huh?

Mary: Why is there a Greek chorus?

William: [indecipherable] chorus now.

Mary: Yes, why?

Chorus: ♪ Over the hills and it must be done ♪ ♪ To England, Glorious Revolution! ♪ ♪ William commands and we will obey ♪ ♪ Over the hills and far away ♪

Mary: Shoot, shoot, shoot! What story with a Greek chorus ends well?!

William: It’s just a device, Mary, it doesn’t mean–

Mary: The letter! They’re here because of the letter!

William: We received a letter?

Mary: From England. They call themselves–

Chorus: ♪ THE IMMORTAL SEVEN! ♪

Mary and William: The Immortal Seven.

Mary: Parliament has invited us to England.

William: They’ve invited us to invade England.

Mary: Why would they do that?

William: I don’t know.

Mary: We can’t invade!

Chorus: ♪ Invade you must, there’s no time to waste ♪ ♪ James is a monster! Our country defaced ♪ ♪ Blood in the streets and corpses in trees ♪ ♪ Come and put our minds at ease ♪

William: Your father is in talks to invade with Louis. Where? Here! He’s–he’s had his boy and he’s baptized him Catholic and all of England is on the brink of Civil War again!

Mary: What does that have to do with us?

William: Um, well… They want us to depose your father.

Mary: It has to be us?

William: I don’t see another alternative.

Mary: Shoot, shoot, shoot! Is it right?

William: Right? We–we save England, we save the Netherlands, we keep Europe in balance– yes.

Mary: But is it right for a daughter to depose her father? It’s the Fifth Commandment, right? “Honor thy father!”

William: He doesn’t need to die.

Mary: Well, I know my history, William! You only depose a king by killing him. How many former kings do you see walking around?! But… He can’t invade Holland! It’s your country and you care so much for it and the people and it’s so very, very clean– Okay, yes! We should do this. But we have to do it a different way. No blood. No killing. If it’s an invasion, it has to be a bloodless invasion!

William: I don’t know…

Mary: Can you try?

William: Invade one of the most powerful countries in the world, other-throw its king, and not hurt anyone in the process?

Mary: Please?

William: …Ja.

Chorus: *gasps* ♪ What’s that you say? ♪ ♪ We prick up our ears ♪ ♪ [indecipherable] you come ♪ ♪ To end all our fears ♪ ♪ Think of what you both could be ♪ ♪ You’ll go down in history! ♪

Mary: We could, couldn’t we! Imagine all that “First Citizen” stuff here in the Netherlands– we could do that in England! You could bring all of your wonderful ideas to my country! Imagine: Freedom of religion!

William: Freedom of the press!

Mary: And no more torturing! Or bloody pomp and circumstance! And we do it bloodless! We ride into England and the people will rise with us and father will say “Oh wow, that’s what the people want!” And it’ll all work out [indecipherable] Why shouldn’t we be king and queen?! Neither one of us want the damn job so we’re the ones who should have it…

William: Would I be king?

Mary: Yes.

William: Who would you be?

Mary: The queen.

William: Right, but who’s the one in charge?

Mary: …Oh.

William: It would be you, you’re first in line.

Mary: Oh, me? No. 

Chorus: *murmuring in agreement*

Mary: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! I’d rather not.

William: It’s not up to you, you’re first in line.

Mary: Ah, but you! You–you are after me!

William: Right, but you still come first.

Mary: But I don’t want to be queen– okay, wait, wait! Let me think… Okay, solution. ….We’ll… both be king and queen!

William: It does not work that way.

Mary: [spluttering] Listen! We go to England; you raise an army and depose– aw– depose father and then we say “Alright! We’re both king and queen!” What’re they gonna do, say no?

William: Joint monarchs– it would be a first.

Mary: [indecipherable] I don’t know if it’s right. God says to honor thy father, but… that doesn’t feel right.

William: We can say no, Mary.

Mary: No… You okay?

Anne: Yes, quite, sister.

Mary: Okay, good.

Anne: Stop staring at me!

Mary: Let’s keep going. And my heart says to bother you.

William: Your heart says that? What do we want to do?

Chorus: ♪ To England, to England! We sail, we sail! To England, to England! At last, at last! A tempest, a tempest! Begins, begins! And [indecipherable], and [indecipherable]! [indecipherable], [indecipherable]! ♪

Soloist: ♪ To England, we sail / [indecipherable] / [indecipherable] / [indecipherable] ♪

Chorus: ♪ The men are afraid ♪ ♪ There’s no debate ♪ ♪ Revolution now must wait ♪

*storm sounds*

Mary: Ahh!

William: THEY’RE CALLING IT THE CATHOLIC WIND! WE CANNOT SAIL FOR ENGLAND UNTIL IT PASSES! WE’VE ALREADY LOST A THOUSAND HORSES! WE HAVE FORTY THOUSAND MEN WAITING TO INVADE– BUT THIS WIND!!

Mary: There have been so many omens! This wind; the miscarriage! Is it a sign from God?! Can a daughter who deposes her father be a Christian?! Can doing what’s right and God’s will be at odds?!

William: WHAT?!

Mary: CAN DOING WHAT’S RIGHT AND GOD’S WILL BE AT ODDS?!

William: Oh, it is over.

Chorus: ♪ [indecipherable] ♪ ♪ William and Mary, our God has ordained ♪ ♪ Rex and Regina, this we say ♪ ♪ Sail on the future king’s birthday ♪

Mary: Wait, really?

William: Ja. It’s my birthday. The fourth. Historically, that’s just how it happened to work out.

Mary: Oh! Well, that’s a good omen, right? Happy birthday to you!

William: Yes.

Mary: William, wait! Look… I respect you. And, under normal circumstances, I would never breach this, um, unspoken agreement, but, um, it’s his birthday– ah, could we– um, uh– you know– could we do just one round of “Happy Birthday”? Um, what’s a good starting note? *hums* Is that good? *hums* Ready?

Mary, chorus, and audience: ♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪ ♪ Happy birthday to you! ♪ ♪ Happy birthday dear William! ♪ ♪ Happy birthday to your! ♪

*cheering*

William: This is the greatest birthday present I’ve ever received. Thank you.

Chorus: ♪ William has come and we will defend ♪ ♪ To kick out the tyrant and and then will ascend ♪ ♪ His first steps on English soil ♪ ♪ Defender of faith and [indecipherable] ♪

William: Hello? Where the hell is everyone?

Peasant: *screams* Oh, it’s [indecipherable] Day. Everyone’s busy catching cats.

William: Ah. Well, um, I am William of Orange, Defender of the Faith and– wait, why are you catching cats?

Peasant: To [indecipherable] the pope.

William: Ah. Well, I am William of Orange, Defende– the pope?

Peasant: *sighs* Not the real one sadly, but yeah. [indecipherable] cats and set them on fire.

William: Why you do this?

Peasant: For God! It’s tradition! …You’re not from around here are ya, foreigner!

Chorus: ♪ Over the hills and it must be done ♪ ♪ To England, Glorious Revolu– ♪

Peasant: [indecipherable] you are making such a racket!

William: I am William of Orange, Defender of the Faith!

*cat screeches*

Peasant: [indecipherable] you scared the cat!

William: Good woman, have you not heard of our coming?

Peasant: …[indecipherable] in England?

William: I–

Peasant: [indecipherable] and whip em til their backs be bloody!! Ngyeehhhhhhhhh!!

William: *screams* I AM WILLIAM OF ORANGE! I COME FROM THE HAGUE BY INVITATION OF PARLIAMENT! Good lady! We come to overthrow King James II.

Peasant: *spits*

William: Progress. I am the [indecipherable]’s husband and myself, third in line. We come to bring stability and religious… freedom to this… country.

Peasant: Oh, you and what army?

Chorus: ♪ We are [indecipherable] ♪ ♪ Join is so you [indecipherable] ♪ ♪ [indecipherable] ♪ ♪ James will soon be overthrown ♪

Peasant: Oh, [indecipherable], sir! I don’t have anything of worth but… I’d be proud to give you my cats.

William: *coughs*

Peasant: Oh, must be the cat smoke.

William: Oh, this air is filthy. I need a little rest.

Messenger: ♪ One man tried to poison your food ♪

Anne: ♪ Some with bullets [indecipherable] ♪

Chorus: ♪ Mostly [indecipherable] ready to fight ♪

Charles: ♪ [indecipherable] horse was white! ♪

William: Let us move forward!

James: William! What the hell do you think you’re doing?!

Chorus: ♪ James was appalled by the sight that he saw ♪

James: ♪ I’ll have your head, boy, remember [indecipherable]! ♪

Chorus: ♪ Soon his generals started to fall ♪

James: ♪ Troops, make an example of him! ♪

Chorus: ♪ James’ troops then began to abandon ♪ ♪ Our glorious William now [indecipherable] ♪

James: Did you not all swear your loyalty?! You are all my subjects! *gaps* Mary! Ungrateful daughter! You must swear your loyalty to your father! It is God’s will! The Fifth Commandment! Consider the hell– *splutters* What the hell? Anne, Messenger, and Monmouth: ♪ Blood from his nose ♪ ♪ [indecipherable] to God ♪ ♪ James was denied ♪ ♪ His royal throne ♪

James: No! No! What the hell?! *spluttering* The Fifth Commandment– shit! This is terribly inconvenient

Anne, Messenger, and Monmouth: ♪ To James [indecipherable] ♪ ♪ His nose really bled ♪

James: WAIT, WHAT?!!

Anne, Messenger, and Monmouth: ♪ To France, King James ♪ ♪ Finally fleeeeeeeeeeee– ♪

James: STOP SINGING!

Anne, Messenger, and Monmouth: ♪ –eeeeeeeedddddd ♪

James: What, is this really historically accurate?! You’re just gonna let me go, William?! HA! Coward! I will return, William, I promise you that! Mary! Ungrateful daughter! You will suffer the fait of an unfaithful daughter. This is not how my story was… suppose to be told… To France.

Chorus: ♪ William has won now that James has fled ♪

William: *prolonged violent coughing*

Chorus: ♪ London is happy! ♪ ♪ With bonfires lit ♪ ♪ Willy’s lungs can’t take the smoke ♪ ♪ And all the fog just made him choke ♪ ♪ Over the hills and it must be done ♪ ♪ To England, Glorious Revolution! ♪ ♪ William commanded and now we’ve won ♪ ♪ Our new day begins with the rising of the sun! ♪ ♪ Of the sun! ♪

William: *groaning, gasping for breath*

[quaintremedies]

heartbreak under the rain

Prompt number: 5 (”I’m not saying I told you so.”)

Original Fiction*

Rating: teen and up audiences (may not be appropriate for audiences under 13)

Warning/Tags: teenager heartbreak (???)

---

Boxes were scattered all over the place, filling the otherwise empty room. The sight of them made him feel exhausted already, adding to the reality that he had to unbox all of them and put everything in their place. His new apartment, the one he got in the nick of time, was yet to feel like home, but Han Kangdae was glad that things were starting to settle themselves somehow. He remembered how nervous he was when he sent that request to be transferred here a month ago, thinking that he would get an earful from his seniors and fellow rookies. Maybe they would think that he was trying to run away, or maybe they saw him as an opportunist for transferring to somewhere nearer to the city. 

Truth to be told, there was no other reason for his transfer here than Soomin. Although he knew that his daughter had always been well taken care of by his relatives most of the time, with him being stationed quite far away and all, Kangdae still couldn’t help but to worry for her well-being. It was expected; obligated, even, and he would always go through all the hassle to make sure that she was safe and happy. His previous mentor knew this; he was his biggest supporter for the transfer, putting in some good words for him to the station chief so that he could get his approval. Kim Jowoon was a man twice his age but with a spirit of a teenager, Kangdae saw him as a father figure even though he nagged like an angry grandpa who hadn’t been taking his medicine. He would always be grateful for everything Lieutenant Kim had done for him, and he promised that old man that he’d do his best in the new station.

As he pondered while putting his things away as how he would put them in their old place, the man finally noticed that it was starting to rain quite heavily. The pitter-pattering against the apartment windows were quite loud, and when he stopped to look outside, he could finally see the dark grey clouds decorating the endless sky up above. With a sigh, Kangdae leaned his shoulder and the side of his body on the tall window, watching the droplets of rain wetting the earth and scurrying people on the side of the roads below. When most people he knew loved the rain and the smell of the earth in its aftermath, Kangdae disliked it. For a while, all he could see when it rained heavily was his young, pathetic self standing on the edge of the rooftop of the hospital building. He could vaguely recall being drenched from head to toes, staring at his trembling hands that had just held the pale, cold ones of his dead girlfriend in the morgue only ten minutes before. The tears running down his face were sad and cold, mixed with the heavy droplets wetting his face. The moment he tried to take a step forward and ignored the screams of the onlookers down there on the ground, his mind went blank. He felt nothing; not sorrow, not pain, he was like a dead man walking.

The next thing he knew, he was already laying on the floor of the rooftop with one of his ankles being cuffed by an officer, and his arm was held back by the other.

He was only twenty one, he was too young, and it was truly a hard slap on the face.

Kangdae was pulled back to reality when his eyes caught the sight of a young man--a high school student, from the looks of it--walking towards the trash bin across his apartment. From his point of view, the man could only see the teenager’s sagging shoulders and frown, eyebrows rising in curiosity when he threw away the bouquet of flowers in his hands. He decided to pay no mind to that short scene, averting his gaze by glancing at the wall clock. It was already time for him to pick up Soomin from kindergarten. Quickly going around the room to find his coat, wallet, and her favorite raincoat, Kangdae headed out along with an umbrella in hand.

The student was still there, he noticed after he got out of the building, standing alone by himself drenched under the rain. That boy is going to catch a cold, he thought. The probationary officer opened his umbrella up and decided to check on this poor teenager first. He crossed the road without hesitance, and as he got close, those red rimmed eyes were the first thing Kangdae spotted.

With that, the man held the umbrella above his and the boy’s head, earning him his attention when he looked up to him.

“Let me guess.” Kangdae finally spoke to him. “Either you got rejected or your couple cheated on you. Which one is it?”

The boy’s expression changed when the question was uttered. Clearly, he wasn’t anywhere near impressed. “It’s none of your business.” he muttered under his breath, looking away. “You won’t understand anyways.”

Of all types of people in this world, Kangdae just could never handle heartbroken ones. He knew that he was one such person for years, so he often wondered how people dealt with him back then. The man in his late 20s scoffed, knowing that this would take some time.

“Listen,” he said in a rather unsentimental manner to gain the other’s attention again, “I’m not usually the type to put my nose into strangers’ shits, but from where I’m standing, you need to be accompanied in case you’re thinking of doing something stupid after this.”

 Kangdae knew he was right when the teenager turned to him again with that surprised look on his face; it was as if he could perfectly read his mind. When he did, the older one between them smiled, amused by the look he was given right now.

“It’s unfair.” he muttered; his voice told him that he was about to break down real soon. “I loved her first. I loved her for a long time, so why did she choose that other prick over me?!”

Ha, there it was. The young, naive love of minors barely able to pass their exams. Kangdae couldn’t even spare a laugh at the poor boy, but since he signed up for this the moment he made his presence known, might as well just give him a piece of his mind.

“Women are complicated, that’s why.” the man answered lightly. “She’s just one person, there are plenty of other fishes in the--”

“But I only loved her! There are no other women like her.” to his surprise, the boy shouted and ran a hand through his wet hair. “You talk as if you know anything about love.”

 The statement made Kangdae pressed his lips together and inhaled deeply. It was him who was supposed to say that to this little shit.

“Are you seriously going to argue with me about that?” he stared at him rather intently, making the boy cower on the spot. “That’s just bullshit. You’ll find another woman and you’ll forget about that one completely.”

If Yeona was here, she would definitely smack the back of his head for lying to himself.

“Stop wasting your sanity for someone who doesn’t even care.” he reached out to ruffle the young boy’s hair, in which he responded with a protesting groan.

The short conversation lasted long enough to remind him of the reason he went out in the first place. “Tell you what. Walk with me, tell me all about it, and I’ll tell you why none of it matters.” he glanced at his watch, there was still enough time. “I won’t say I told you so, but you’ll see for yourself. Think of it as another heartbroken person helping a fellow, huh?”

The drenched student was clearly confused; unsure, too, judging by the expression he wore.

“Well, unless you decide to wail in self pity, getting all wet and cold because of the rain, then suit yourself.”

Kangdae turned around and started to walk away from him, the umbrella’s protection of the boy was gone as he did. He knew that the kid jogged to catch up with him a few minutes later; he had to hold his laughter while slowing his pace.

“You made me sound so pathetic.”

“You are pathetic.”

---

*context: The character is an OC of mine. He’s a single dad with a daughter who works as a police officer in his probationary year.

[chayacat]

Devil’s Sweet Star (9)

Fandom: Dead by Daylight

Ghostface x Female Reader  

Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut  

***

The rain... both beautiful and sad to look at. A real inspiration for some, a moment of relaxation for others. But for you it's mostly the day when people will flock to your café to protect themselves, sipping a good hot chocolate, tea or a good coffee.  

Today you only open in the morning, the weekend is approaching and you want to take a little more time for yourself. There were not many people at the moment, Melina, Jed's colleague and friend, was among the first clients. Decidedly you will attract all the Roseville gazette to your café... You were sitting with her at the table right next to the counter, both with a coffee in her hand, Melina having taken a share of Neptune's cake with her coffee.

Melina Catalina Da silva was born in Las cruces, New Mexico, to a Spanish father and a Mexican mother. They moved to Missouri when she was 4 years old, to live the "American Dream" and, although the early days were difficult, her parents gave her access to education. If her physique and her voice opened the doors of cinema and music, it was to journalism that Melina turned. However, do not rely on appearances, she knows very well to fight and some ended up in the hospital.

“I can't believe, he really told you that?” you said laughing.

“Hell yeah! He thought I was going to shut up after that, instead I blew him a few teeth! You had to see his head with less teeth. Frankly leave me like that... for a bimbo with three tons of paint as make-up, because I was not the easy girl he wanted.” Melina responds proudly.

“Ah Boys... They always want sexy girlfriends who have three neurons. And then we are surprised that some complexes on their bodies. When you love, the body doesn't matter. Only inner beauty matters.”

“Few boys have the same thought. The only ones I've met are Mattew... And Jed.”

“Tell me, you and Jed... Are you already...?”

“Me and Jed?” Starts Melina before laughing. “Hahahaha! You’re so cute! No, we never dated, I consider him as the little brother I never had. That's why I call him Jeddy. And sometimes I'll kick his ass, so he can focus more on his personal life than his professional life.”  

“Oh... Could you tell me more about him? I admit I don't know him as well as you do.” you ask shyly.  

“Well, Jed is... He's a real nerd. He thinks about work all the time and even on days off, he works at home. But... He's a lovely boy when you know him. And when you know what he went through with his parents... sometimes I think that, if I had been in his shoes, I would have killed myself. But he... He got up and fought. He has learned to fend for himself, and he has an almost frightening patience.” Said Melina.

“That's what he told me. And I think I would have ended my life too.” you said looking down to your coffee.

“And yet he didn't tell you everything about his childhood. His parents beat him and treated him like a dog, often leading him to the hospital. And of course, they said it was accidents, like falling off stairs and everything that goes with it. As he must have told you, he was an unwanted kid. But the worst part is that the whole family knew, and no one, absolutely no one helped him. So, he cut ties with his family, all he keeps from them is his last name. He deserved better than that. And when I see what he is today... if I didn't know all this, I'd say he's a lovely boy who was raised like any boys should be. Kind and respectful, but not to be annoyed.” Replied Melina before looking at you, a big smile on her face. “Why do you want to know all this? Do you love him?”

“W-What??? N-no! It's only... curiosity. Just curiosity...” you respond blushing like a tomato.

“Hey. There is no marked "dumb" on my forehead. I saw the little looks you were giving him. And then your face when he gave you his number, I saw it too.”  replied Melina with a smirk.  

“It's embarrassing.” you answer by looking elsewhere.

“Why??? I think it's so cute coming from you! In addition to what you told me about you, I don't understand why no one wanted to go out with a face as adorable as yours! You know, my grandmother used to tell me that sooner or later we'd find her soul mate. That when we born, the bonds were already woven to guide us to him or her. And nothing could stop it. Maybe you and Jed have that bond that brought you together. Now it's up to you to see what you're going to do.” Said Melina before eating her slice of Neptune’s pie.  

“If you say so...”

“My grandma never gets it wrong about this kind of thing. She has... a gift for this mystical stuff. She knew from an early age that she would meet my grandpa. And she knows that my mother will be my father's first and only wife. She even knew that Mattew would go out with Chris.”

“She’s really amazing. But I don't want to force things. I will let things come on their own and I will act on them. I’ll see what happens.”

Melina nod, then you go back to the counter to take care of the customers for the rest of the morning. For once, Jed didn't come and you're a little worried about that. Considering what happened to him yesterday, you can imagine the worst. What if Mike had gone after him again?

You and Melina were the last to leave the café at closing, and even though she assured you that Mike didn't know his address, your concern for Jed didn't go away. You go home with some unsold cakes, give some to Mrs. Lawson before heading to your apartment.  

Your gaze rested for a few seconds on Jed's door and, biting your lips, you decide to check by yourself if everything was okay. You knock on his door. No noise. There's no answer. This is not a good sign. You knock a second time, praying that he's answering.

“One minute, I'm on my way!” he said from the other side of the door, which made you sigh with relief. Thank god he’s alive... “Yes? Oh! It's you.” he said with his angelic smile.

“Hi. I... I was just here to hear from you. With what happened... I confess that I imagined the worst.” you said shyly.  

“Oh... That's very kind of you, thank you. Don't worry Mike doesn't know where I live. It does not risk ... to come and finish the job. I was focused for tomorrow night. We have a scandal to uncover. And a few more researches don't hurt.”

“You're reassuring me. I mean half, I hope you didn't sleepless for this research! I brought you some cakes, at least what Mrs. Lawson left. I thought it would do you good.”

“All the cakes you give me will always be a real sweet moment for me. Do you want to come in? I'm offering coffee for once.” He replied with a wink.  

You nod and he let you in. His apartment was neat and had all the comfort Jed needed. Despite the coat rack at the entrance, Jed had the tendency to put his jackets and coats on chairs or sofa. The kitchen was tidy and clean, some small green plants hanging around the corners.

A few films were on the tv cabinet, a reminder of the days when streaming didn't yet exist, as well as some CDs. Paintings decorated the walls of the living room and hallway, and a library full of books, next to the window. A real journalist's apartment, in short.

“Surprisingly, I expected to see this style of decoration. Simple but comfortable. And... Do you work in your living room?” you ask with a smile.

“Ha ha no, I have an office right next to my bedroom. Locked, in order to keep my job... Safe. I hope... You understand that.”

“Of course. So... Ready for tomorrow night? I must admit that this is the first time I go to this kind of event, and especially to play spies. I feel a little uncomfortable.”  

“As long as you stay with me, you'll be peaceful. But once we have what we are looking for, we will have to leave the place without raising suspicions. And I think I have an idea of what to look for.” He said before getting up and fetching something from his office, locking the door. “I think that... Hoggins will try to double his profits by sinking the last trade he just signed. I made some research about him and discovered that he had signed 4 more partnerships with former competitors, and that these 4 partnerships all flowed because of Mckellan.”

“You think, Hoggins is planning all this with McKellan, with the goal of eliminating his competitors all over the country, and thus being the only one on the market?” you ask looking at the papers.

“I'm sure. By removing his competitors, he recovers the shares that are due to him, if it’s not the whole. And so, he becomes more influential. The goal is to be, with McKellan, the only big fortunes, in the American market. We need to find proof of all this. An e-mail, a written record, between Hoggins and McKellan. And the only place you can find all of this is in his office. And if we succeed, one of the biggest scandals of this decade will come to light.”

“It looks risky. But I'm up for it! if we can put that bastard in jail, I'm ready for anything!” you said determined which made Jed smiles and Danny smiles bigger.  

You chat with him for a long time, laughing heartily and, in the early evening, you leave his apartment with a big smile on your face. It's really nice to talk to a boy as nice as him. Maybe Melina was right, maybe you and Jed were destined to meet? It is said that things never happen through chance, but there is no question of forcing fate either. If something has to happen between you, it will come naturally.

You open the door to your fridge to see what you're going to devour tonight. Homemade nems will be perfect! plus you have everything you need so no need to go out. You want to prepare everything while singing, you love to sing whether in the kitchen or in the shower, washing dishes or cleaning. You have a voice worthy of a bird song. You could have been a singer! But if it was to end up alcolic or drugged ... it wasn't worth it.

Tonight, a horror movie goes on TV, it will change you from those rotten action movies you've seen recently, with a budget as big as the best movies made so far. All with a homemade peach iced tea. Even the drinks, you make them yourself. You don't like industrial products too much, too much fat, too many conservators, too many sugars. Just horrible.  

Once your nems are ready, you prepare your meal tray, and you'll land in front of your TV, right in time for the start of the movie. it was a classic slasher, but it was always having its effect ... especially with a chainsaw. In the middle of the film, you get up to clean your plate and glass before wiping and storing them.  You start yawning while stretching, but you don't want to sleep. You turn off the living room lights and sit back on your couch to see the rest of the movie.

As sleep made you feel carried away, a noise startled you. You get up, slightly trembling and start heading towards the source of the noise. Steps were heard and you rushed to the kitchen to take something to defend yourself.

“I don't recommend it; you could hurt yourself with that little knife.” said a man voice who caught your arm and turned you in front of him, blocking your arms. And the only thing visible in the dark was this mask... “Glad to see you again...My sweet little star.” He said with a soft voice.

“It's not reciprocal.” you respond coldly.

“Ouch, you hurt me so hard. You should be kinder to me. After all, I let you live because my curiosity, about you, took over my desire to bleed that pretty neck.” He replied caressing your neck with his fingertips.

“How did you get in? And if you're not here to kill me, what do you want?”

“It’s a secret. I wanted to see you... face to face. And also, to speak like good friends. You seem to get along well with the little nerd... to play little spies. All this to bring down men I could kill... If you ask me.” he said, chuckling a little.

“Certainly not! I will never kill anyone with my own hands, Even less ask someone to do it!” you respond trying to get you out a little bit, in vain.

“Oh come on. Don't tell me you're a little naive girl who thinks solve all her problems legally. Sometimes you have to use radical means to overcome certain problems... Thorny. Deep down, you want to. You'd like me to shove that knife deep down his throat, to mutilate him for threatening you like this. I know everything he's trying to do to you... absolutely everything.” he replied, gently passing his knife along your face, without hurting you.

“Stop it! Let me go!” you said wiggling before he takes off his hands laughing and backing up. “You’re just a f***ing psycho!”  

“ouch you hurt me again. But I get used to it. Anyway... This guy will die sooner or later by my hands. We can talk about what you owe me at that point. But until we meet again... Pay attention to yourself and your sweet angel face, my sweet little star. You sing divinely well by the way.”  

He stroked your cheek before leaving through the window. You catch your breath, trying to relax your muscles. You close all the shutters and windows of your apartment before turning off the TV and going to bed.  

You look at the roof, thinking back to his words. Deep down, he was right. Solving all problems peacefully is not always the solution, but killing someone is worse. You have always been raised so as to use diplomacy more often than force. And that's not going to change. Even if McKellan deserves to be slaughtered for everything he's done? You sigh and turn off the lamp before covering up.

Tomorrow night will be the big night. And you won't have the right to make mistakes.

***

(Done! It was hard but I've made it! in fact I'm so excited to start the next chapter because I’ve got a lot of ideas in my mind! I'll hope you'll enjoyed it like the others! and don't forget if you have questions or you want to talk or if you have pages to recommend me just do!  See ya!)  

[writingwhatneedswriting]

Could you do some jealous Jotaro with a reader who is his best friend but he wants to be more than that

Indeed I can~ Beware, swearing and mild sexual implications ahoy

“Haruto!” She giggled. She always giggled for him. He’d sat her on his lap, the way he always did to taunt Jotaro, knowing that he got the one thing Jotaro wanted but couldn’t just take. Y/N. The girl of his dreams. The girl he fought a dozen gang members and won for.  “What? Can’t I tickle you anymore~?” “Not in public, people are looking!” “People will look more if you keep shouting like that~” “I mean it! Stop!” She laughed, trying to push his hands away.  Jotaro knew she didn’t mean it, but acting all gooey with her boyfriend made him fume with rage. He’d been by her side this whole time, looking after her when that gang targeted her. Hell, he went to jail for her, before the Egypt debacle happened. Then boom, he came home with the confidence to finally tell her how he felt, and she was in the arms of another man.  Haruto had a cocky smirk, the kind of smirk that pissed Jotaro off most. He wasn’t a stand user, so there wasn’t any way he could kick the shit out of him and use that as an excuse, so any time he wanted to spend with Y/N was time also spend with that smarmy toad.  All that bastard every did was touch her and kiss her and make her blush, and Y/N didn’t even know that he was cheating on her. Still, it wasn’t Jotaro’s place to say. It’d just drive a wedge between them and give Haruto an excuse to isolate her from him. He didn’t want to lose her. He’d already lost Kakyoin, Avdol and Iggy.  In his festering, angry trance, he hadn’t noticed the commotion. All of a sudden, she was stood up off of her boyfriends lap, and his cheek was red with heat. He blinked, shocked, before he stood up too, trying to figure out what was going on, when he noticed how Y/N awkwardly pulled the hem of her skirt back down, and Haruto dropped a torn scrap of fabric, matching the skirt.  “What’s your deal, bitch? We’ve been dating for months!” “You can’t just grab my skirt like that!” “Like hell I can’t! You’re my girlfriend, dammit! Stupid bitch-!” he moved to slap her in return, with a boiling heat in his dark eyes. He was planning to do more than smack her: he wanted to throttle her.  In an instant, time was stopped. Jotaro didn’t have long, so he ran between Haruto and Y/n, before having Star Platinum punch Haruto’s smarmy face into oblivion. By the time that time began passing again, Haruto had been forced back, doubled over the chair and bent, awkwardly, on the floor, with his toes firmly planted on the floor either side of his face. he screamed, grasping at his now-crooked nose, cursing Jotaro and Y/N.  “You asshole! Prick! I’m gonna kick your ass! You’re dead, Jotaro Kujo! Dead! And you, Y/N! You’re next!” “No, she’s not.” Jotaro’s sole found itself firmly planted on the young man’s face, pressing down. “Good grief... Y/N, you ready to dump this weed yet?” The girl glowered down at her “boyfriend” before sending a swift kick to his side, making the boy scrunch up even more. “Yeah... Haruto, we’re done.” She snapped at him. “Come on, JoJo... let’s just go...” She murmured. Jotaro smirked. He usually got pissed off when others called him JoJo, but when it was her soft voice that said it, he couldn’t help but feel a twinge inside. He nodded, stepping off of Haruto’s face before walking away with Y/N.  “So,” He began, looking down at her, with his eyes shadowed by the brim of his iconic black cap. “you’re single now that you dropped the loser. You got any idea what you’d be looking for in a new guy?” She smiled up at him, before sliding her small hand into his. “I have a little idea... Dark hair, green eyes, gruff expression... could be called JoJo...” She then stopped, smiling. “Can you guess who?” she asked.  Jotaro’s heart skipped a beat, but he hid it, looking away. “No. Who?” Me. Me. Please, say me. “Your grandpa!” She chirped, before plucking his hat from his head and bolting. “Y/N! You get back here!” “Only if you catch me!” Oh, I will. He thought, chuckling quietly to himself. And when I do, I’m not ever letting you go again.

[mst3kproject]

Dracula vs Frankenstein (1971)

 I’ve been meaning to get to this one for a while.  It was directed by Al Adamson and stars Lon Chaney Jr. from Indestructible Man in his last and worst film.  Also featuring appearances by Greydon Clark (director of Angel’s Revenge), Forest J. Ackerman (the comic book guy from Future War), and Jim Davis (the grandpa from The Day Time Ended, not the guy who invented Garfield), and generally being one of the shoddiest and most confusing movies I’ve ever sat through, it is a mystery to me why Joel chose Carnival Magic and just left Dracula vs Frankenstein sitting there.  Maybe it was the widescreen thing.

It’s hard to say what the hell is going on in this movie but I’ll give it a try.  Under the cover of a carnival freak show, mad Dr. D’Ray is decapitating nubile young women and then sewing their heads back on, because… uh… because.  One night, his work is interrupted by none other than Count Dracula!  The Count reveals that he knows D’Ray’s secret – D’Ray is really the last surviving member of the Frankenstein family, and Dracula has recovered the body of the original Frankenstein’s Monster and wants D’Ray to help him bring it to life, because… uh… because.  Meanwhile, a woman named Judith Fontaine is looking for her sister, Joannie, who was last seen on the beach near Dr. D’Ray’s Creature Emporium.  Judith and her boyfriend Mike eventually find their way into D’Ray’s lair, and the doctor and his various deformed assistants (obviously he has deformed assistants) are all killed as the couple attempt to escape again.  What Judith and Mike don’t know is that they’re not safe yet.  They still have Dracula to deal with!

That outline actually only represents a fraction of the madness in Dracula vs Frankenstein.  There’s a rapey biker gang and a bunch of noticeably over-age hippies who seem to think they’re in a very different movie.  There’s D’Ray’s hunchback Groton and his pet puppy, and Grazbo the Angry Midget. There’s the stunningly unhelpful detective who’s supposed to be looking for Joannie.  D’Ray brings the Frankenstein Monster back to life with the help of a magical comet.  The idea that creatures like Dracula and the Frankenstein Monster actually exist is treated as obvious and commonplace, and the climactic fight between the two is over who gets to feel up Judith.  It’s a mess.

The reason Dracula vs Frankenstein is such a mishmash of incongruous ideas, at least according to El Santo of 1000 Misspent Hours, is that Adamson filmed for a while, then ran out of money and had to set the project aside while he raised more.  During this intermission, he got a bunch of new ideas, and had to shoehorn them in with what he’d already shot to turn his original sex-drugs-and-rock-n-roll film into a monster-versus-monster piece.  It should therefore surprise nobody if the results are about as graceful as a giraffe on roller skates.

The two title monsters are astonishingly shitty. Frankenstein’s Monster looks like the Pillsbury Dough Boy gone horribly wrong.  He looks like his head got stepped on and they couldn’t afford to fix it. The first time you see him, when Dracula digs him out of a cemetery, you can barely tell you’re supposed to be looking at something’s face – it looks like a mass of home-made play-dough that’s been left out in the sun.  He has claws for some reason.  That sequence of similes still doesn’t do justice to just how absolutely terrible he looks, and yet, shockingly, he’s less stupid than Dracula.

Oh, god, this movie’s Dracula.  His face is slathered in Observer makeup (though his hands aren’t, probably because it would have gotten all over everything) and he wears bright red lipstick and fake fangs that don’t allow him to fully close his mouth.  His vinyl cape almost definitely came from Party City. His voice echoes like he’s talking into an empty garbage can, even when he’s sitting in the back seat of a car. He has an incredibly funky goatee and a ring that shoots fire.  Everything he says and does is deeply, self-consciously dramatic and it all comes to an absurd crescendo in the series of priceless faces he makes as he turns to dust in the sun.

On a scale of absurd theatricality, Dr. D’Ray is only shortly behind him.  The mad doctor dresses like Colonel Sanders, has some classic evil facial hair, and spends much of his screen time monologuing… but nothing he says ever makes a lick of sense. The stuff that comes out of his mouth is literally indescribable so I’m going to have to give you some examples:

Rambling in his lab, D’Ray describes his work as follows: “human blood is the essence from which future illusion may be created, but the secret is not to have the blood at rest.  No, the circulatory system must experience a traumatic shock, one that is inconceivable to the human mind.  The idea of trauma is not a new one, but I am sure I am the first such experimenter to incorporate the horror of an actual decapitation into later rejuvenation of a human body!”  This is evidently supposed to be a justification for the sewing-heads-back-on thing – it ‘activates’ the blood and allows D’Ray to make his ‘serum’.  He then injects that ‘serum’ into Groton, who transforms into an axe-wielding maniac.  Later, Dracula claims that the same ‘serum’ would have made him invincible.  I, uh… what?

Sorry, I was talking about D’Ray’s monologuing.  When describing his Creature Emporium, D’Ray informs some guests, “the greatest mysteries in the world are not mysteries at all, unless we take time to become familiar with them.”  Isn’t that the opposite of how mysteries work?  It’s easy to believe in, say, the Loch Ness Monster, until you familiarize yourself with the history of the ‘evidence’ and realize that it’s almost all complete bullshit.

When Dracula shows up, D’Ray declares, “I am too old and too sick to be interested or surprised by anything, but when a man comes into my house and casts no reflection on my mirror, and on his hand wears the unholy crest of Dracula, there is no scientific answer to anything.  Now, what is on your mind, Count Dracula?” Honestly, this nonsense is spoken with such conviction that you almost don’t notice that the end of the sentence has nothing to do with the beginning.

The movie has two things that might qualify as a ‘special effect’.  One is Dracula’s zappy fire ring.  It’s crummy, but you can tell what they’re going for.  The other is the ‘comet’ that is instrumental in giving life to the Frankenstein Monster.  This is represented by a slow pan past a flickering light bulb against a black background.  Even having just heard Dracula talking about the importance of the comet, it took me a minute to figure out what I was supposedly seeing – it’s that bad.  This might be halfway forgivable if the comet were somehow important to the plot… if the Monster, for example, had to complete some mission before it sets or something.  But it’s totally gratuitous.  They could have taken that out, avoided a distractingly awful effect, and made the movie a little bit shorter!

As for meaning anything… Dracula vs Frankenstein does not, and indeed seems to go out of its way to avoid it.  The events that unfold are remarkably meaningless.  Judith finds her sister Joannie, who is not dead but neither is she alive, and then the story just forgets about Joannie and gives her no resolution.  Hippie girl Samantha is saved from being raped by her angry ex and his biker gang, but then she, too, is entirely forgotten.  D’Ray and his henchmen die in a series of contrived accidents that serve no purpose but getting them out of the way so that Dracula and the Monster can fight uninterrupted.  This is particularly anticlimactic because so far, D’Ray has been presented as our main baddie.  Dracula disintegrates Mike with his magic ring and then the movie rushes to its climax without giving either Judith or the audience time to deal with it.  Dracula, the movie’s actual main baddie, just turns to dust in the sun.

There are a couple of moments that are probably supposed to be social commentary, but they have nothing to do with the meandering main plot. One is the scene where a hippie guy says to his girlfriend, “let’s get ready for the big protest tonight.”  She asks, “what are we protesting this time?” and he shrugs and replies, “I dunno, but I bet it’s fun.”  Later we see this protest, which does seem to have a major ‘party’ component and features some very unspecific placards being waved.  In another sequence there’s a druggie bar with the walls covered in graffiti that say things like POT and SOCIETY SUCKS.

Boy, I bet Adamson was really proud of sticking it to those angry young people.

Dracula vs Frankenstein is mesmerizingly bad.  Usually the best bad movies are the kind where you can follow the story a bit, so you aren’t wasting time wondering what the hell is going on instead of appreciating the nonsense dialogue and unconvincing effects.  Dracula vs Frankenstein is a singular exception.  You never have any idea what anybody’s doing and yet somehow it doesn’t matter… the movie gives up on making sense very early, and just forges merrily ahead, dragging you along behind it.  What’s actually happening never matters enough to distract.  I honestly don’t know if this is a point in the movie’s favour or not… but it would have made a hell of an MST3K episode.

[giyuu-no-tsuma]

Heeeeeey, since you are manga caught up and you have read the ending, how about, Sumihiko and co time-travel to the Taisho era and meet their ancestors?? How interesting would that be, and Touko would recognize they all existed! (Also Kanata x Touko is cute, screw the sick minded people saying it's incest)

Ahhhh, what a awesome and interesting ask! Well, I don’t really argue with close-minded people about something, so if they still want to be stubborn and still want to think it’s incest, best thing is to leave them be, because we know it’s not incest and Gotouge already explained it, their fault they’re stubborn not anyone else’s. 

Anyways to the ask! Without an illustration since there aren’t GIF’s or pictures:

PS: Time-travel doesn’t seem realistic to me, so excuse me if I took it into my comfort zone, I had a better idea for it!

Sumihiko and his brother were having a sleepover over the Agatsuma’s, Kanata mostly by Touko’s side, holding her hand and both smiling to one another. Sumihiko and Yoshiteru talking about anything really.

Their conversation went on, until Sumihiko brought up the story of their ancestors and how they fought with the demons and the Demon King.

Touko listened to their conversation and rolled her eyes, stating that it was just fiction, that their great-grandpa was just someone with big imagination. Upong which Yoshiteru argued her statement, earning a harsh pull on the ear.

“What if they actually existed and fought against them? Can you prove it’s fiction?”

At Sumihiko’s answer, Touko had much hesitation, she herself didn’t have any proof to her statement. So she just said she didn’t.

“What if we time-travel?”

*Of course Yoshiteru was greeted by his oldest sister’s scolding and ear pulling.

“You dummy! Time-travel doesn’t even exist! Why is it that you’re like this always! Was great-grandpa Zenitsu like this?!”

“Of course time-travel is impossible... But if they existed, then surely some memory or something may be there.” Kanata tried to reason and calm Touko down, so she could stop pulling on poor Yoshiteru’s ear, which was pretty swollen and red.

Touko stopped doing what she’s doing, smiling and giving the reason to Kanata. That boy surely made her relax a little.

“Well, great-grandpa Tanjirou fought with this katana right?” It was when Sumihiko pulled out the katana they kept as memory.

Kanata wasn’t that happy his younger brother took the memorial katana without asking.

“Sumihiko, you shouldn’t have taken it. It’s a memorial.”

“I know, I know, but I’m curious about great-grandpa and his adventures with the demon slaying job! How he and great-great-great Aunt Nezuko had it. We know the story of our three-times great uncles and aunt dying and our three-times great aunt turned into a demon, how they went throught it, so many things I want to know!”

Sumihiko’s enthusiasm was evident, and it all started to get Touko more interested in the topic. Well if they really did existed, then maybe there is something somewhere to know about them.

The four talked about the topic until pretty late, and called it a night, everyone sleeping in futons in the living room. Soon, they all started to dream. It was a shared dream. In the dream, Sumihiko woke by started, he was in a different house, didn’t seem to be Touko and Yoshiteru’s. It all looked pretty ancient, like the Taisho era.

“Eh? Where are we?” The boy looked around, and felt pretty out of place and worked out, he noticed his brother was sleeping next to him and shook him lightly. “Kanata, Kanata! Nii-san wake! We’re not in home!”

Kanata groaned and slowly opened his eyes. “Sumihiko? What are you saying-” He was quick to sit up, his brother was right, that wasn’t  home. He quickly turned to Touko sleeping by his other side and shook her. “Touko? Touko-chan, wake up, something’s up.

Touko was quick to be up and smacked her brother awake. “Wake you you dummy!”

Yoshiteru yelped and scrambled to his feet. “Wha, nani nani?!”

“We’re not home, where is here?!” Touko was becoming pretty agitated, when Kanata held her hand and she calmed almost immediately.

“Don’t worry Touko-chan, if you’re here with me, then nothing can happen to you.” He reassured her softly.

It was night in that strange place. Soon they heard some voices, turning looking in awe.

“Tanjirou! Where are we going?!” A blond with the same appearance as Yoshiteru but save from the blond to orange hair.

Then the called boy stood there, it was Tanjirou, Kanata and Sumihiko’s great-grandfather, very alike with Sumihiko, save from the earrings and the scar.

“Great-grandpa Zenitsu...” Touko whispered

“And great-grandpa Tanjirou...” Sumihiko echoed.

“It was real after all...” Touko was no convinced and Yoshiteru took advantage of it.

“I was right all this time, not Nee-san?”

“Urusai, baka!” Touko kicked him in the side, she had such a temper, once again she found herself being held by the hand by Kanata and she calmed.

“I wonder why my sister is such a hooligan...” Yoshiteru grumbled, but then quickly shut up at the glare said sister shot him.

Soon it came the time where Nezuko pulled out of the box and stood next to her brother. Many similarities with Touko. The other girl at seeing her three times-great aunt, she got a real shock, she was demon. All the stories told by their other family members were right and the diary her great-grandpa wrote also was right, she could tell that this was a time where they still were not close to defeat the threat that was Muzan.

“Woah, that kid Giichi’s ancestor” Sumihiko commented, meaning Giyuu who was with the trio, same hair but longer, same deep blue eyes and face shape. Giichi was an elementary kid he often ran into when he was in a hurry to his school, he was watching the ancestor of that kid.

Suddenly Yoshiteru had parted from the group and it was only by Touko who freaked out.

“Ah, where did that idiot go?! Yoshiteru!!” She barked, searching around, they were in an unknown territory but that kid really had to disappear just like that?

Kanata put an arm around her. “Don’t worry Tou-chan, we’ll find him, that’s for sure,” Though he really was in the same with his girlfriend of wanting to smack that kid good.

Yoshiteru had adventured himself a little in the dense forest, wanting to see a demon or see if one would come. He was curious. And his urges to do so came when out of nowhere one jumped at him. The boy screeched. “GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

“Oh no that idiot got into trouble!” Touko ran where she heard her brother’s scream, going along with Kanata and Sumihiko. When they got there, they froze seeing it was a demon.

Soon a voice was heard. “Water Breathing, Second Form: Water Wheel!”

The demon’s head was sliced off, and Yoshiteru turned to look at his savior, Tanjirou stood there, going over to see if the boy was okay.

“Are you okay?”

“Yoshiteru!!” Touko ran over and immediately smached her brother upside the head. “Baka! Only you would think on getting lost and into trouble in unknown territory, you idiot!” She smacked him again, having half the mind to just smack his tush for that, but restrained herself.

“I-I’m sorry Onee-san...I was scared!” he immediately started screeching with tears, but this time his sister sighed and hugged him. She turned to look at Tanjirou... her three-times-great uncle...

Tanjirou blinked. “H-hey, you kid... you look like Zenitsu..” He stared at Yoshiteru then to Touko. “You like Nezuko...” And then was Kanata. “And you like Kanao....” what got him into a freeze was Sumihiko who looked like him, saved from the earrings and the scar.

“Tanjirou, what’s wrong?” Giyuu soon joined and so did Zenitsu and Inosuke.

The four kids from many, many, many years later where stared at like they were aliens.

“G-great-grandpa...” Sumihiko started.

“Great-grandpa?” Tanjirou blinked, was this some sort of dream? Was he asleep and dreaming that he had a great-grandson? Where were his kids and grandkids then? If this kid was his great-grand son? He didn’t understand.

After a big explanation, Tanjirou understood, in the future he was to marry Kanao, have kids and grandkids, these two Sumihiko and Kanata were his last generations, therefore in the time where these kids were from, he and the others were likely dead.

“This is unbelievable but, here you are.” 

“You were awesome, great-grandpa, really awesome!” Sumihiko exclaimed happily. “You fought with everything and the others too. I’m glad I was able to meet you, something that I thought impossible.”

Soon, back to the current time, the four were starting to wake.

“Uh what?” Sumihiko looked around, they were back at the Agatsuma’s home, so all that was just a dream?

Kanata rubbed his eyes and looked around, unsure of what just happened a while back.

Touko yawned and blinked. “A dream?”

Yoshiteru was simply sleeping soundly still.

“That dream felt very real.” Kanata commented. “So it might’ve been a clue to the mystery of our ancestors.

“Still awesome we got to talk to them even if a dream, that’s checked outta the bucket list!” Sumihiko chirped.

Touko smiled. “Great-grandpa Zenitsu, simply like Yoshiteru, a cowardly yet heroic and strong man. Not that Yoshiteru is that, but our great-grandpa was.”

“Now we now they existed, the heroes.”

From now on the ancestors were remembered as existent and so the demons, even honored. The dream was actually a real thing.

[hello-im-not-a-possum]

Prompt: Wally Franks, but he's a wizard.

One wizard Wally coming right up!

It was a miracle how the Janitor kept the studio clean.

Even when it was just a tiny shack of a building, it was a busy tiny shack of a building that had ink and papers constantly spilling everywhere; crumpled up balls of paper that would miss the trashcans, broken bottles of ink, and god knows what else because people are messy. But it was manageable and easily cleaned. After all, if Wally 'slacks off until the last possible second every single day in that dumb hat of his' Franks managed to keep the place spotless, it couldn't be that hard.

Anyone in the studio could recognize Wally without even meeting the man because of that ridiculous hat, but nobody could tell why he wore such a thing as he always changed the story behind it.

"Laugh now, but dese are all the rage ouva in dose hoity-toity upscale cities. I'm gonna mistaken for one of those shmucks and get famous!"

"Oh, dis old thing? Okay, let me set the stage fah ya: Way, way, back in good ol' 1692, my great-great-insert a couple dozen or so more 'greats' in dere grandpa really cheesed off a witch in da woods... *one over the top ridiculous story later* ...and now my entire bloodline is cursed to weah stupid hats."

"I Might've lost da first bet, but ya should've seen da getup the outha guy's stuck with!"

"Da best way ta keep a clown from sneakin' up an killin' ya is ta trick 'em into thinkin' you're one of them."

"All my outha hats got covered in ink."

"Didn't ya see dat Mickey Mouse short in da 'Fantasia' thang Disney put out? Obviously I wear dis stupid hat 'cause gives me magical powers."

"Isn't 'Steamboat Willie' they only animation that Disney made?"

"Aw shoot- I mean, I must've been thinkin' about something else then."

Often after answering he'd laugh and nonchalantly change the subject. Nobody really thought anything of it, the Janitor was the biggest chatterbox in the studio and always had a bunch of different subjects on his mind.

The day after Henry left, the studio expanded.

More rooms to fill with art, more people to fill the void of the lost creator, more ink to fuel it all. In fact, it didn’t stop there, why should it? Joey more musicians and started hiring voice actors to make future cartoons even better than the old ones, to prove to himself that he didn't need Henry to make their creation successful. Yet in spite of this rapid growth, the cleaning staff still only had one member; a single janitor and his stupid, colorful, pointy hat.

Joey didn’t even bother trying to hire anyone else for the studio’s cleaning staff. Even when animators and musicians got concerned for Wally about being the only janitor at such a big studio, Joey always said that he could never find anyone as ‘talented’ as Wally for the job. And to the Director’s credit, he was correct. No matter how large the studio grew, no matter how often the janitor slacked off, and no matter how bad the messes got, the studio would always be completely and perfectly spotless when the workers arrived in the morning. While Wally did complain to high heaven about having to clean up after everybody and often repeated what was essentially now his catchphrase, he never seemed to be exhausted from the job itself. If anything, he seemed to be overall more well rested than the other staff.

However, almost no one paid mind to this, after all, they work to do and had deadlines to meet, no time to spend wondering about the Janitor's uncanny ability to stay on top of his workload, they just were used to it and accepted it as one of the studio workers’ natural mysteries. Like how the building felt like it was changing itself sometimes, or how the projectionist seemed to be anywhere and or everywhere, or how the music director seemed to be a seer who made bitter, sarcastic, and or dry humored remarks that would often turn into accurate predictions of the future, or how Joey always seemed to know where everyone in the studio was. (Okay, that last one might’ve just been that he had the building wiretapped and there was nothing supernatural about that.)

Thankfully for Wally Franks, there was only one person who really took the time to sit down and question how he managed to get all several stories of the now almost constantly inked studio completely spotless was the man who had piled on a couple extra chores with his and his machine's arrival.

--------------------------------------------------------------

“So I’m cleaning da studio late at night an' I almost forgot dat Mistah Conner started doing late night shifts an' he almost caught me in full swing, I had brooms and mops out flyin' everywhere an' he almost saw everythang! Luckily, his footsteps are pretty heavy so it was easy ta know when he was coming but man dat was close! And I'm startin' ta think he's caught on to da fact dat there's something fishy goin' on down 'ere an' I bet I was really something suspicious back 'dere. 'Dis is the first time since dat incident he let me outta his sight while on da clock. What do ya think Sam? Last straw? Should I really get outta here before it gets worse? How'd my futuah look eitheah way?"

The music director sighed in annoyance before answering the janitor.

"For the last goddamned time, I CAN'T really see the future, Franks! That's just a dumb running joke between the studio."

"But you definitely can! And wit' accuracy too! remembah when ya told me ta not eat dat sandwich in the fridge or else I'd get punched even though it was MY Sandwich and afta I shrugged ya off, Jerry went an' clocked me in da jaw? You saw the freakin' futuah! You saw that I'd get punched and ya tried ta warn me!"

"Or, I saw the fact you have a long history of eating other people's food, had my back turned to you at the moment, and thought you were eating Jerry's sandwich. Jerry probably also thought you were eating his sandwich because you two brought in the exact same lunch!"

The musician stood up from his seat to refill his coffee mug, but before he could, the janitor dropped down on his knees in front of him and gave him his best 'puppy dog eyes'.

"C'mon Sammy! Please tell me what I should do! I don't wanna end up stuck in jail or dead from this! I have a girlfriend and a kid!"

The unwilling prophet pinched the bridge of his nose as he thought of something to tell the "wizard" to get him off his back.

"My best advice to you is to tell Conner about your secret in a secluded area, preferably a night shift you both work. If he doesn't believe you, demonstrate a simple yet flashy spell. And then wait for his reaction. If you get the feeling he's going to tell the world, tell him that if he tells anyone else, you will curse him and his entire bloodline."

"Wait, really? I mean, I don't plan on ignorin' ya but is dat really the best caurse of action?"

"What's wrong with it?"

"Well fer starters, cursing an entirah bloodline ain't somethin' you should take lightly! Even if it's something small, just, an' kinda silly like; 'Every time ya yell at someone for somethin' they didn't do, yer voice turns all high pitched and squeaky'. Ya could end up ruinin' someone's life! What if Tom's great-great grandson or whateva decided ta become a lawyeah and while defendin' his client, his voice got all squeaky. He'd be da laughin' stock of da legal system an' I'd be ta blame!"

"Okay, fine. Then just curse Conner specifically if he tries to ruin your life."

"But I don't even use magic on livin' things! What if I screw up an' accidentally turn him inta some kinda squeaky toy? Besides, is dere any otha way than just, revealing my secret dat I kept for my entirah life ta some guy who came in here an' started bossin' me around?"

Sammy rolled his eyes in annoyance. An action that registered to Wally as 'Why do these people keep asking me for help with the future if they keep fighting against me over the advice I give?' While Sammy knew his action meant 'Why am I constantly being bothered by my coworkers over their dumb running jokes pretending that magic is real?'

"Well, you told me, didn't you?"

"I mean, yeah, but dat's different! We're both, you know, and he's... well, not! I know you won't out me, but he might, even unda da threat of cursing!"

The two stood in silence for a bit before Sammy tried to leave again and Wally blocked his way.

"Just in case, do ya have any otha predictions?"

"I predict that if you stand between me and the coffee machine for any longer, you will suffer a terrible fate by my hands."

"Okay, okay! jeeze..."

And as the musician left for the break room, Wally silently dreaded the next time he and Tom would work a night shift together. Hopefully the studio's constantly irritated oracle was right about this being the best course of action.